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writer1 · 3 years

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Fear of the unknown

Chapter 2

Summary: Your boyfriend Rex has been gone for a month long campaign and you can’t wait to see him, but something has happened during the campaign that changes everything

A\N: The rewrite of fear of the unknown! Any feedback on this is greatly appreciated.

You and Rex both arrive back at his quarters, completely exhausted after the Council meeting. Rex was asked all kinds of questions about the mission, and the circumstances that lead to him becoming a werewolf. And everything that happened after. It was tiring for Rex, both physically and mentally, but you stayed with him the whole time, and he is grateful for that. You both learned that the Kaminoans wanted to experiment on him as soon as they heard, but they were quickly and harshly stopped by the Council.

The whole meeting ended up lasting a few hours, and it was late when you had arrived on the Resolute, so it’s way past supper time now, but you were supplied with food. Obi Wan was trying to figure out why Rex wouldn’t transform, so he went down to Coruscant earlier to go through the Jedi Archives. He’s hoping to get some answers.

One you’re in Rex’s quarters you turn to him. “Hey, would you mind if I borrowed one of your shirts? I didn’t bring anything to sleep in.” Rex looks at you with wide eyes. “Aren’t you going to head back to your apartment?” You raise an eyebrow, “This late?”

Rex blinks in confusion, then he looks sheepish. “Sorry, I forgot what time it was.” He rubs the back of his neck sheepishly, making you chuckle. “That’s okay, but even if it was earlier. I would still stay with you, Rex.” Rex Smiles at you. “Thank you, Cyare, I just don’t know how you can sleep in the same bed as a monster.”

You frown with a sigh, walking over to Rex and placing a gentle hand on his arm. “For one, you are not a monster, Sweetheart. Nothing could ever make me change my mind about that fact. And two, You are the most handsome werewolf I’ve ever seen.” Rex snorts, then chuckles and pulls you close. “I’m the only werewolf you’ve ever seen, Cyare. But thank you.” You smile against him, pulling away only to press a kiss to his cheek. “I love you, Rex.” Rex smiles and hugs you close again, being careful of his new strength. He gently licks the top of your head again, nuzzling it as well.

“I love you too, and yes, you can wear one of my shirts." Rex lets go of you and walks over to the tiny dresser, he grabs a shirt and tosses it to you, and a pair of his shorts. You smile. “Thanks, Rex.” You turn around and Rex looks away to give you some privacy, you change out of your clothes and into the shirt and shorts Rex had given you. “I’m done, you can look now.” Rex turns around to see you walk towards him and set your clothes on his dresser.

You turn to him. “Ready for bed, Sweetheart?” Rex yawns a big yawn, showing off his sharp teeth. But you don’t care at all. “Yeah, I haven’t slept very well since I was turned into… this.” You frown, but offer Rex a comforting smile. You walk over to the bed in the corner and lay down, you squeeze yourself as close to the wall as you can. Rex is going to need lots of room. Rex stares at you with doubt for a moment, but you pat the bed and smile. “It’s okay, Rex.” He smiles and walks over, crawling into bed beside you. He’s very careful not to break the bed, or you, in the process.

Rex wraps his arms gently around you, then pulls you against his chest like he always does. You snuggle into him and get familiar with him, some things are the same. He’s still wearing the same pants that he always does during the day, the only difference is the rips in them that allow his fur through. It tickles your knees as you chuckle a little, Rex is usually one to wear shorts and a t-shirt to bed, but not tonight for obvious reasons.

He snuggles into you as well, letting out a sigh of longing and content. He hasn’t held you in his arms in a month, and he has missed you so much. “You smell amazing, Cyare! I missed you so much, Y\N.” You smile at him, moving up and pressing a kiss to his cheek. “Well, I’m glad that you don’t think I stink.” Rex lets out a breathy chuckle, nuzzling your hair. “You could never stink to me, Cyar’ika.” You sigh as you sink into his fur, allowing your eyes to drift close. You listen as Rex’s breathing slowly evens out and he falls asleep, he still hugs you close, even in sleep. You smile as you slowly drift off as well, allowing the quiet hum of the ship and Rex’s quiet breathing lull you into a deep, peaceful sleep.

xxx

Your eyes flutter open and you breathe in deeply, sighing as you feel Rex gently nuzzle your neck. You smile until you realize that this feels too normal. Wasn't Rex a werewolf? You think to yourself, waking up a little more, you glance down at Rex's arm, he must've thrown it across your waist in his sleep, and found it much smaller, with no blonde fur in sight. You turn over and come nose to nose with Rex, human Rex, you gently cup his cheek as he lets out a little sigh. He's still asleep and has no idea what has happened.

You smile softly, happiness bubbles up in you. Although there's confusion with it, he's been trying to transform, but he only transformed now. It doesn't make any sense. Why would it happen while he was asleep? And he has slept in this form before, so why now? You look at Rex closely, there's nothing to indicate that Rex is a werewolf except for his torn, stretched out pants and the bite scar on his forearm.

You push the thoughts away, only wanting to think about Rex right now and how happy you are that he's human. You love him no matter what form he's in, but you know how unsure and scared he was when he was stuck as a werewolf. He's going to be so happy to know that he can be human again. You lean over and give him a soft, gentle kiss on his lips. Rex hums a little in his sleep, then you pull away and do it again. This time his eyes gently flutter open and he looks happily at you. “Mornin’ Cyare,” You smile and cup his cheek. “Rex? Have you looked at yourself yet?” you ask quietly, and his face twists to confusion, he raises an eyebrow then looks down at himself.

His eyes widen when he sees that he’s human again, a large smile appears on his face as he jumps out of bed and looks himself over. “How… I’m human again!! How did this happen! Y\N?” He looks over at you, but you frown and shake your head. “I have no idea, Rex. I woke up and you were human, I’m not sure why?” Rex gives you a soft smile and sits back down on the bed, hugging you close to him. He presses a soft kiss to your forehead. “Thank you.” he whispers gently as he hugs you tightly, you blink in confusion, unsure of why Rex would thank you.

“What are you thanking me for, Rex?” You gently pull away and cup his cheek, stroking it with your thumb. Rex sighs, closing his eyes and gently leaning into your hand. After a few seconds he opens them again. “You never left me, you stayed even when I was a monster. And you are still here even when I may turn back into that monster.” You pull him close, kissing his forehead, then his lips. “Again Rex! No more calling yourself a monster, and of course I stayed, you are still the man I fell in love with, just… Furrier. You always are no matter what you look like.” Rex smiles and nuzzles his forehead against yours, closing his eyes and sitting like that for a few minutes. When Rex pulls away he gently grabs your hand and laces his fingers with yours.

“We should probably go tell the General’s that I’m human again. Hopefully General Kenobi’s figured out why I couldn’t transform.” You smile at Rex and give him a quick kiss before standing up. “I’m sure he has, Sweetheart.” You grab your clothes and quickly change into them as Rex turns to stare at the wall after grabbing a new pair of blacks to change into. “I hope so, I don’t really want to get stuck like that again” you smile softly as you turn around to see Rex clipping his armor on while staring at the wall, you let out a little chuckle, prompting him to turn around. He smiles as he finishes up putting his arm pieces on. He walks by you and sits down on the bed to put his leg armor on. Once he’s finished he walks over to you and gives you a soft but quick kiss. “Ready to go, Cyare?”

You smile and give him a nod. “Yeah, I’m ready.” you grab his hand before pulling him towards the door, he comms General Kenobi as you punch his code into the door. No one answers, making you and Rex both raise an eyebrow. The door slides open and you both walk out into the hall. Rex turns to you as you walk. “I’ll call General Skywalker, he always knows what General Kenobi is up to.” Rex waits patiently as his Comlink tries to get through to General Skywalker, after a few seconds General Skywalker finally answers. "Hey, Rex. How are you feeling after everything that happened the past few days? " You smile softly, General Skywalker is one of the friendliest Jedi you've ever met, you should have known that he would ask how Rex was first. Rex smiles excitedly "I'm doing good, sir. I finally turned human." There’s an excited gasp from Anakin.

"That's great, Rex, I'm so glad you're okay now." Rex smiles as you chuckle. "Thanks General, do you by any chance know where General Kenobi is?" Anakin sharply breathes in, obviously annoyed. "How many times have I told you to call me Anakin, Rex? But yes. I know where Obi Wan is, he's sleeping in his quarters after I had to rip him away from the Jedi archives." You and Rex share a look, Of course General Kenobi would research all night instead of sleeping, from what Rex has told you he hardly ever sleeps. Rex sighs softly, but filled with annoyance. He hates that General Kenobi almost had a sleepless night because of him.

"Well, just let him sleep, force knows that he needs it. Just tell him to comm me when he's up, please." “Of course, Rex.I’ll talk to you later.” Rex hangs up the call and you both get going, walking through the halls of the Resolute as you run into Fives, you smile. The surprise and happiness on his face is evident when he sees that Rex is back to being human once again. He grabs Rex and hugs him close. “Rex!! You’re human again!!” Rex chuckles as he hugs Fives close. “Yeah, I am.” Fives pulls away and gives Rex a confused look. “How? We-- we tried so hard, how did you figure it out?” Rex sighs, looking at Fives. “I didn’t figure it out, I just woke up this morning and bam, I’m human. Neither me nor Y\N have any idea why.” Fives gives Rex the most comforting smile he can muster and pulls him close again. “Who cares, at least you’ll be able to go back to leading the boys. I seriously have no idea how you ever managed it Rex." Rex smirks as he hugs his brother back. “Lots of Caf, and I have Y\N here.” You roll your eyes and punch his arm as he pulls away from Fives, groaning when you realize you punched his armor.

You glare at him. "You're just sucking up." Rex smirks at you as Fives outright laughs, but then Rex frowns. “Just because I’m human again, doesn’t mean that I won’t transform again.” Rex is trying to be strong, but he can’t keep the tremble out of his voice, and both you and Fives notice.

“Hey, whatever happens, you are still my brother, my Ori’Vod. No amount of fur, claws or sharp teeth will ever change that.” Fives tells him, pulling Rex close again, he then pulls away only enough to place his forehead against Rex’s. You then place a hand on his shoulder as Fives pulls away. “He’s right, none of us are going to leave you, Rex.” Rex smiles, nodding at you both.

“Yeah, thanks. That made me feel better.” Fives smiles. “Well, it’s true. Now let’s head to the Mess, I’m starving.” Both you and Rex burst out laughing at Fives, who glares. “What? I am!” with that the three of you head to the Messhall, you agree with Fives, you are absolutely starving.

xxx

All the Troopers in the Mess pause their chatting to turn and look at you three, but mainly at their Captain. Some wave happily at Rex, and others yelling a welcome back at him. They are all definitely happy to have their Captain back. None of them mention a word about Rex being a werewolf, or being human again, your bet is that they are trying to keep Rex comfortable, and you are very thankful for that.

The three of you grab your food,then go and sit down with Jesse and Kix, who wave you three over. You sit between Fives and Rex on one side, while Kix and Jesse sit across from you. You try a bite of the food, making a face and deciding that you hate the food here, it tastes horribly bland. No flavor at all.

Rex must see the face you make, because he starts laughing, but quietly. “Now you see why I love your cooking so much, Cyare.” You give him a shy smile, you aren’t sure that your cooking is that good. And you tell Rex that. “It isn’t that good, Rex.” You tell him quietly as Jesse, Kix and Fives all widen their eyes, giving you a surprised look.

“Not that good!? Kriff, Y\N! We all fight over the leftovers Rex brings with him, even General Skywalker!” Fives tells you as he gestures around the room, your own eyes widen with surprise, you can’t believe that everyone loves your food enough to fight over, even General Skywalker! You don’t think your food is that good. Kix chuckles. “He’s right, Y\N! Fives, Jesse and even General Skywalker end up in the medbay because they’ve gotten injured fighting for your food. I can’t blame them though, it is delicious.”

You smile at them softly, happy to know they like your cooking. “Now that I know, I’ll definitely cook extra food for you guys to share.” Both Fives and Jesse’s smiles widen considerably, even Kix’s smile gets a tiny bit bigger.

Rex frowns slightly, he’s happy you want to do that for his brothers, but he doesn’t want you to have to do all that. “You don’t have to do all that, Cyare.” You smile, grabbing Rex’s hand and giving him a soft kiss, he hums but looks around, his cheeks heat up in embarrassment. You’ve only been dating for six months, so he’s still not used to kissing you in front of his brothers, who chuckle.

“It’s okay, Rex. I really don’t mind. I’ll just make bigger meals and send it with you.” Rex nods as you give him another kiss as his brothers chuckle, but don’t make any comments so as not to make him uncomfortable. You pull away then continue to eat, you do your best to ignore the bland taste of the food. Jesse, Fives and Kix do the same.

Then Rex’s Comm goes off, he raises an eyebrow and pauses his eating to answer it. He looks at the ID. “It’s General Kenobi!” He answers it. “General Kenobi.” “Rex, it’s very nice to what from you, Anakin has informed me that you’re human again?” Rex smiles happily as you and his brothers smile as well.

“Yessir. it somehow had happened while I was sleeping, I still haven’t figured out why.” You hear a hmm sound from the other side of the Comm. “Well, we’ll try to figure that out. Can you meet me in the meeting room, I think I've found some information about werewolves you should hear. It might help us figure out this… predicament." You sigh in relief, not believing that you and Rex might finally find some answers.

"Yes, Sir. We'll be right there." Rex tells General Kenobi, then You and Rex excuse yourself and head to the meeting room, you both hope to finally have more information about werewolves that might help Rex, maybe even a cure.

xxx

You both make it to the meeting room, General Kenobi and General Skywalker are already there, making you smile happily. Although he does look very tired, General Skywalker wasn’t kidding when he said he had to drag General Kenobi to bed, and that he needed rest. You both sit across from them, and you bounce your leg nervously as Rex squeezes your hand.

“Rex, I’m very happy to see that you are human again.” Obi Wan smiles and Rex returns it, but squeezes your hand again. “Not as happy as I am, General.” General Kenobi smiles. “I’m sure, and you can both just call me Obi Wan, no need for formalities, same with Anakin.” You nod, making a mental note to do that. General Sky-- er, Anakin looks over at Obi Wan.

“Master, what exactly did you find out about werewolves?” Obi Wan sighs, giving Anakin an annoyed look. “Be patient, Anakin. I’m getting to that.” Anakin sits back and pouts, making Obi Wan shake his head. You and Rex both chuckle. "So, I found out a few things. Pretty much there isn't much besides legends about werewolves. But I found out that one of our own Jedi padawans was bitten by one 300 years ago."

Your eyes widen significantly. Wait! What? There was a werewolf Jedi. You think to yourself, you almost can't believe it, Anakin and Rex both have surprised looks as well. “What? That's impossible, we would know about it? Wouldn’t we? Why were we never told this!”

Obi Wan sighs. “It wasn’t that we weren’t told about it Anakin, nobody knew. His Master had a journal where he had talked about it, that’s the only place I found any information about him, or anything else about werewolves.” You give Obi Wan a curious look, how could no one have known about this.

“Who… Who was he?” You ask, curious about who this Jedi was. You’d like to know everything you can about this so you can hopefully help Rex. Obi Wan gives you a sad look. “His name was Jak, Jak Evos. and he was only ten years old when he was bitten.” Everyone's eyes widen at hearing that, and Rex looks over at Obi Wan with a look of sadness. “H-He was only a youngling, I-Im an adult and I can hardly handle any of it, I can’t even begin to imagine being his age. The poor child.”

You grab Rex’s hand, giving it a squeeze, you agree with him, that boy was just a child, it’s absolutely horrible. Obi Wan nods as Anakin sighs with sadness. “Yes, what that poor child must have went through must have been horrible.” Obi Wan shakes his head, trying to clear his thoughts to no avail. “I asked Master Yoda about him, he knew the child, but he never had any idea that he was a werewolf. Him and his Master kept it a secret from everyone.” You look down at the floor in sadness, your heart goes out to that youngling, how afraid must him and his Master have been to never tell anyone, not even Master Yoda.

“What happened to him, Master?” Anakin asks softly, voice filled with sadness as he asks, he’s just as upset as you and Rex. Obi Wan turns to him. “Master Yoda said that Jak died in battle, he was in his forties.” Then he looks towards Rex. “I did find some useful information in the journal so far though.” Rex perks up at that, making you and Anakin both hold back chuckles. “Really? What is it?” Obi Wan gives a soft smile.

“Well, a werewolf's transformation is connected to their emotions, such as fear or anger. Which is probably why Rex couldn’t transform, he was much too afraid and nervous.” Your eyes widen as you think about it, that’s definitely not good. After a few seconds, Anakin pipes in. “So once Y\N arrived on the Resolute and spoke to Rex, he calmed down enough that when he fell asleep, he transformed back.” You smile, Anakin is definitely right, Rex had fear pretty much radiating off of him when you had arrived, but once you told him you still loved him, and that you would never leave him, he calmed down considerably.

Rex blinks in confusion. “So what does this mean, exactly? I'll transform whenever I get upset!?” Rex squeezes your hand hard, not hard enough to hurt, but still hard. You can tell he’s afraid, and you squeeze his hand back. “Hey, it’s okay.” You whisper to him, making Rex look at you and calm down a little.

Obi Wan smiles at the two of you, but then he frowns. “It’s not just then, if you’re on a planet during a full moon cycle, you will transform no matter what. Nothing will stop it, and to make matters worse, the journal says that transformation’s caused by the full moon are very, very painful.” Obi Wan has an upset look when he says that information, and you have the same kind of look. What’s going to happen now? Most planet’s have a full moon cycle, what will Rex do if he gets caught up in one?

Anakin sighs heavily with frustration. “What are we supposed to do, Master? What if Rex transforms during a mission and none of us can calm him down?” Rex looks down at the floor, knowing that his General will say he’s a liability, but-- “I won’t have him in a position where he could get hurt or killed, Master. He’s my friend and one of my men!”

Rex looks over at Anakin, who smiles softly at him, making Rex give a surprised look. It brings a smile to your face, but then you frown. Rex can be gone on missions for up to months at a time, although none of those have happened so far in the time you have been dating. But if he did transform and couldn’t transform back, he could jeopardize the mission. Or it could take a long time to get him back to you.

Obi Wan looks between the three of you before smiling. “There is a bright side, from what I read in the journal, Rex may be able to learn how to control it. Jak’s Master wrote that Jak couldn’t stop it completely when he was too upset or angry, but he could hold it off, although it was kind of painful too.” You squeeze Rex’s hand as worry fills you, so many things could happen if Rex couldn’t hold it back.

But Rex just smiles at you, then at Obi Wan and Anakin. “That could help, if I start to transform, I could hold it back until I get to better cover. Away from the battle.” You smile at Rex, that’s a good idea. It would keep him safe, and not jeopardize the mission at all. Then Anakin turns Obi Wan. “But we still have the problem of Rex transforming back to human.” your smile drops as you realize that, that's still a problem.

Obi Wan smirks. “That's where Miss Y\N comes in.” You look at him with surprise as Rex and Anakin both do the same. “Wait? What do you mean, me?” You ask, pointing at yourself as Rex nods. “Yeah, what do you mean, General?” Obi Wan looks between the two of you and smiles. “I was thinking of asking the Council to allow her to accompany you on missions, she is a Mechanic. And Anakin does need another mechanic on the Resolute, do you not, Anakin?”

Obi Wan gives Anakin a sly smile, who happily returns it. “He’s right, we do need another mechanic.” You smile as you see where they’re going with this, and you love it. This way you can be with Rex all the time and if he does transform, then you can help him turn back human. “I’m in!” You tell them excitedly. Making Rex turn to you, he has a worried look on his face. “Are you sure, Y\N? It’s going to be dangerous.”

You smile at him. “I’m sure.” You squeeze his hand reassuringly, you are absolutely sure that you want to go with him. You then turn to Obi Wan. “Is that all you learned, Obi Wan?” You ask as you glance at Rex, you can tell he’s ready to leave. He seems to be having a hard time processing everything. Obi Wan nods.

“I haven’t finished the journal yet, but that’s all I’ve learned so far. I’ll comm you two if I learn anything else. And Rex, you may take a break today, you deserve it.” Obi Wan looks at Rex, who nods. It worries you since Rex isn’t one to take breaks. You grab his hand gently, and you both leave the room. You turn to him and offer a comforting smile. “Where do you want to go, Rex?” He looks at you, a face full of fear and nervousness. “My quarters, please?” Rex whispers, making you nod and chuckle. “Okay, lead the way.” You tell him and he smiles, as he pulls your hand and gently starts leading you to his quarters.

It’s only a few minutes of walking through corridors, and you're there. Once you are both through the door, Rex closes it behind the two of you, and walks over to his bunk. He starts stripping off his armor, and you look away when he gets to his blacks, giving him some privacy. Rex chuckles sweetly at you, making you smile. “You can turn around now, Cyare.”

You do as he says, smiling when you realize he’s wearing the shirt and comfy pants you had bought him a few weeks ago. He then frowns, worry filling you as he starts pacing around the barracks, breathing heavily as his mood takes a complete turn for the worst. He hugs himself, and you can tell that he is freaking out over… everything that has happened in the last few days.

“What… What the kriff do we do!! I…” He takes a deep breath, and you walk a bit closer, only for him to start walking again. “I can’t be in the middle of a mission and just… just suddenly turn into a giant wolf!!! Do you know how bad that could end!!!” You look closely at your scared boyfriend as he paces around, seeing tiny bits of blonde fur starting to grow on his face and arms, as his ears grow a tiny bit longer and pointed. His eyes are a glowing yellow as well.

He seems so afraid, breaking your heart into a million tiny pieces. You know he’s scared… so so scared. And he has every right to be, this is a scary and new situation. One that is almost completely unknown. You walk over to him, he’s taller now, but you don’t care, not at all. You gently grab him so he stops pacing and looks down at you, eyes filled with fear. You gently wrap your arms around him, standing on your tip-toes and pressing a soft, sweet kiss to his lips.

Rex hums, wrapping his arms around you, the kiss ends and he immediately shoves his face into your hair, and you feel him take a sniff. It makes you chuckle, but then you pull away, cupping his cheek and gently thumbing a bit of his fur with your thumb as he looks you in the eyes. “Rex, it’s going to be okay. Remember what Obi Wan said? You can hold it back if you have to, maybe long enough to hide.”

Rex looks down at you with so much love in his eyes, but there is still so much fear in them as well. “Y/N… I… Look at me. I’m partly transformed as we speak. If this happens, and the Separatists find out--” “Shhh.” You shush him, as tears fill his eyes and fall down his face. It isn’t often that your captain cries, but when he does, you know it’s bad. “I’m scared, Cyare. I’m so, so scared.” He lets out a heart shattering sob, as he breaks in your arms.

You pull him close, feeling him nuzzle and smelling your hair on the top of your head. “We’ll… We’ll figure this out, Rexy. I promise.” You tell him, trying not to cry. “But if you don’t want to transform right now, then you need to calm down. Try taking a few deep breaths for me, alright?” You ask softly, and Rex nods. He starts to breathe deeply, and you feel him relax in your arms. After a few minutes, he starts to shrink down to normal height, all his fur disappearing as his eyes and ears return to normal.

Rex pulls away from you, smiling softly at you as he wipes his tears away. “What would I ever do if I didn’t have you, Cyar’ika?” He asks softly, and you smile, but then tears flood your eyes, finally falling down your cheeks. Rex immediately frowns, pulling you close. “Hey, hey, hey. Don’t cry, Mesh’la. Please don’t cry.” He whispers, gently kissing your tears away, but more continue to fall.

“I… I’m scared too, Rex. I don’t want to lose you… I… I want to be strong for you, I shouldn’t be crying.” Rex’s eyes grow soft, and he pulls you into a hug. “You don’t have to be strong, we’re both scared. I’m not going anywhere, I promise.” He kisses the tip of your head, holding you close in his strong arms.

“You're going to have to grab your things from Coruscant soon, Cyare. We're probably going to have another mission in the next few days.” He tells you quietly, nuzzling the top of your head. You’re thankful Rex changed the subject, as your tears slow and you smile.

“I’m sure Fives will get a gunship ready for me tomorrow, he probably already has. Now, how about we spend today watching some holo-films and cuddling together? Just you and me?” You ask, earning a happy smile from your boyfriend. “Yes, please. I’d love to.” He presses a kiss to your lips, pulling you tight against him. Then Rex swings you up into his arms, carrying you over to his bed and setting you down on the bed.

Rex sets up the holo-player, and your favorite movie, then he lays in bed, pulling you on top of his chest. And that’s how the two of you stay, snuggled up to eachother, just relaxing and forgetting about the events of the past couple of days.

Taglist: @captainrexisboo @tobitofunction @pentaghasm @ohmsjedi @pro-fangirls-unsocial-life @ellie1366 @marine-captain-deku @reimet @commanderrivercc-3628 @ahsokatano-thetogruta @captainrexwouldnever

#star wars clone wars #my writing #werewolf au #wererex #werewolves #werewolf rex #wererex x reader #werewolf rex x reader #fear of the unknown #captain rex #captain rex x reader

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hapalopus · 3 years

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Darren Shan is actually hilarious, just look at this:

The scariest scene I’ve ever written was possibly chapter two of a book called Lord Loss, the first in my Demonata series. In it, a teenage boy wanders into his parents’ bedroom to find his mother, father and sister all ripped apart by demons. It’s vicious, heart-wrenching and visceral, and 10 years after it was first published, I still think it’s at the cutting edge of what is acceptable when writing for teenagers.

When I sent the early draft of Lord Loss to my editor, she was horrified. She loved the book overall, but chapter two had to be drastically rewritten before she would feel comfortable publishing such a work. She asked me if I would undertake a complete rewrite of the offending chapter. If I’d been a younger, more naive writer, I might have baulked and refused point-blank. But having been around a while by that stage, I’d got to know the workings of an editor’s mind, so instead I did something different.

I lied.

And said, “Why, of course, I’ll be happy to change it.”

See, the thing about horror is that it usually carries the greatest impact the first time round. When you read a really creepy scene, it will hit you hardest upon your initial exposure to it, because of the shock of the unexpected. Second time round, it’s almost never as bone-shuddering.

So I figured my editor would be less traumatised by Lord Loss the next time she read it. I gambled that I could actually change very little in chapter two, but that if I made one substantial tweak which would be immediately apparent, then she’d feel that I’d actually changed far more than I had.

In that early draft of the book, the main character’s mother was beheaded, and he walked in to find her body hanging upside down, “blood dripping to the floor from the gaping red O of her neck.” (I’m still proud of that line all these years later!) His father, meanwhile, had merely been ripped apart, and was lying in bloodied shreds in a corner. (I won’t go into any detail about what happened to his sister, as I don’t want to spoil all the sweet surprises for those who haven’t read it!)

My brainwave was to change almost nothing else in the chapter, but to swap the fates of the mother and the father. So, in the subsequent draft, it was the dad who was found hanging upside down, head chopped off.

And that was absolutely fine!

“Oh yes,” my editor said with relief after she’d read it. “That’s much better. Thank you for all the hard work you’ve done addressing our concerns. We’ve no issue with releasing this now.”

Source: https://www.theguardian.com/childrens-books-site/2015/jun/30/darren-shan-horror-books-for-teens-demonata

#darren shan #the demonata #i love this man

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cycwrites · 3 years

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WIP Things aka Unofficial Fic Tease

In order to remind myself that I’ve left all of you hanging for the rest of my trilogy rewrite, I thought I would post my unbeta’d, unedited, good with the bad chapter 1 for the second movie. I also have hope that it will make me feel guilty for taking so damn long and get back to it. Especially since I’ve basically closed myself off from writing (and the muses) and I’m trying to pry the doors back open because I really do miss sharing my stories with you guys.

I wrote this well over a year ago, along with a 2nd chapter that deals with the Dean’s office, and really just hope you like it.

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About Damn Time

Chapter One: So That Happened

Word Count: 2600 -------- ~B~

At the end of Beca’s junior year, two things of note happened.

First: Chloe, once again, made the decision to stay with Beca and the Bellas and failed Russian Lit for the third time. Beca had tried to talk her out of it, torn between wanting Chloe to move forward in her life beyond Barden and guilt that she was relieved they wouldn’t have to figure out how to work a long distance relationship. She wasn’t ready to try that and couldn’t imagine leading the group without her. But Chloe had insisted this was where she’d wanted to be and she didn’t feel like she was missing out on anything.

Second: The Bellas were asked to perform at President Obama’s 50th birthday celebration at the Kennedy Center on August 8th.

Beca had laughed when the call had come through the never used landline at the Bella house.

“Good afternoon, this is Mack Johnson and I’m calling on behalf of the White House…”

“Yeah right. Nice try, Jesse.” She hung up and pulled out her cell phone as she walked into the kitchen. Pausing by the counter she typed out a quick message to him.

Beca: I’ve gotta give you points for originality though. You almost sounded like an actual adult.

She poured herself a glass of lemonade before he answered.

Jesse: I’m going to take that as a compliment and ignore the wound to my manly pride, but I have no idea what you’re talking about.

Beca: Whatever you say, ‘Mack.’ If you’d said you were calling from anywhere but the White House I might’ve let you keep talking.

Instead of answering via text, Jesse called her.

“Are you day drinking, Mitchell?” Jesse clucked his tongue. “Without your lesbro? I’m hurt, Becaw.”

“I was going to ask you the same thing.” Beca lifted her glass and took a sip. “What inspired your call today?”

“Uh, your cryptic and confusing texts to me, of course.” Jesse chuckled. “Want to clue me in?”

Beca sighed. “Man you’re committed to this.”

“To what?”

Beca set her glass on the counter. “Fine – you just called me and –” She jumped as the phone in the living room rang for only the second time in her years at Barden. “Pretended… to be… from the White House.”

“I thought you said you weren’t drinking?” Jesse laughed but it sounded distant as Beca watched Chloe answer the phone.

Her girlfriend’s blue eyes went wide and locked on Beca’s as she said, “I’m sorry, did you say you’re calling from the White House?”

“Jesse?” Beca said absently.

“Yes, Beca?” His voice took on an echo as all the blood drained from her face.

“I gotta go pass out now.” She swallowed dryly. “I’ll call you later.”

“Beca wa-”

Beca had remained frozen in the kitchen while Chloe became more and more animated, frantically scribbling down notes on the notepad sitting beside the phone, though her voice was carefully calm and collected. Then she’d run into the kitchen, screaming and jumping in excitement and talking faster than Beca’s shocked mind could process. Drawn by the commotion like a frat boy to a kegger, the rest of the girls soon joined the chaos while Beca still stood frozen by the counter as they swirled around her.

The school had allowed them to stay on campus through the summer so they could discuss songs and choreography. The time had been a whirlwind of security checks and practice and everything they planned needed to be vetted by the performance organizers. Of course, since they’d come to the Bellas after their third ICCA win in a row, there weren’t any real problems.

Until the night of the performance when one set of tangled silks and a desire for no panty lines wrecked everything.

No pun intended.

~B~ Sunday, August 24th, 2014

Beca lay on their bed and stared at the ceiling, listening to Chloe pace beside her.

“I’ve ruined everything.” Pace to the head of the bed. “Destroyed our reputation.” Pace back to the foot. “Made the Bellas a joke.”

Beca sighed and pushed herself up on her elbows. “Chloe. It’s a capella. It’s already a jo-” She stopped as Chloe spun to face her, outraged. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it.” Beca tried a smile. “I was just trying to lighten the mood.” She let it slip when Chloe just stared at her and Beca dropped back down to gaze at the ceiling. “Won’t make that mistake again.”

“I’m the one who gave Amy the green-light to do ‘Wrecking Ball.’” Chloe resumed pacing.

“Because, despite most of her claims, she actually had done some training on the silks before coming to the states.” Beca countered, as she had for the past three weeks. “She was good on them and never once in our rehearsals did she get tangled up.”

“But-”

“No.” Beca cut her off and sat up, pulling her legs up to sit cross legged and face her. “We all agreed to let her do it. It was a group vote.” She softened her voice and held out her hand. “This isn’t all on you, Chlo.”

With a sigh, Chloe took her hand and let herself be tugged onto the bed. Beca stretched back out and Chloe settled against her side. “It feels like it.”

“That’s because you’re the one who looks out for us.” Beca gently rubbed her back. “No one could’ve predicted this, love.”

“No…” Chloe said grudgingly. “But…”

Beca cut her off again. “There’s no buts.”

“Except Amy’s.” Chloe huffed, tension that had begun to fade making her stiffen up again in Beca’s arms. “All over the news.” She groaned. “Why didn’t I just use the cloth I was freaking holding to cover her up?”

“Same reason I didn’t,” Beca said reasonably, having heard a version of this several times before. “My mind went blank and I couldn’t move. I just… kept waiting to wake up.”

“Same.” Chloe pressed her nose to Beca’s shoulder. “I still am. This is such a nightmare.”

“She feels bad.” Beca offered. “It was her idea to do that press conference.” She winced as Chloe snorted.

“Yeah, where she then tried to show her ‘silk burn’ to the entire world.” Chloe sat up and pushed herself off the bed. “Again.” She resumed pacing and Beca’s mind hunted around for anything she could say to defuse things.

“At least we saved Aubrey’s college legacy from Pukegate?” Even as the words were out of her mouth Beca knew they were stupid and wrong.

“And ruined ours with Muffgate.” Chloe snarled.

“I wish I could find the asshole that came up with that. Bet it was those podcast people and of course everyone else jumped on it.” Beca made a face. “It was an accident and eventually there will be another crisis for them to focus on.” She slid over to the edge of the bed and swung her legs over. “It won’t be forever, Chlo.”

Pace, turn. “But tomorrow we go see the Dean.” Pace, turn. “With those podcast people who are apparently actually part of the Collegiate A Cappella Association.”

“They’re still weird and he’s an ass.” Beca stood up and stretched as she heard the door open at the bottom of the stairs. “Think you’ll be able to enjoy yourself at dinner tonight?”

Chloe stopped by the small table they inherited from Aubrey and took a deep breath. “Of course. It’s Amy’s birthday. I’m not going to ruin it for her.” She flashed Beca a small grin, the first in an hour. “Why do you think I’m up here instead of downstairs?”

“Speaking of,” a new voice said from the stairs. “There’s maybe… A situation.” Jessica smiled apologetically when they both looked at her as she reached the top.

Beca sighed. “Of course there is.”

“Do I even want to know?” Chloe pinched the bridge of her nose.

“Probably not, but Stacie sent me to get you.”

“Coward,” Beca muttered. “She knows I can’t hit you because you’re too nice.” She took a deep breath. “Okay, quick like ripping off a band-aid.”

“Amy’s sitting on the couch. With a towel on her lap.” Jessica hesitated.

“That’s… Why is that a big deal?” Chloe asked, confused.

“She’s… commando. Because of her silk burn.” The blonde’s shoulders bounced once but she didn’t say anything else.

“I swear to fucking god I’m going to glue underwear on her,” Chloe muttered under her breath.

Beca was struck by a horrible thought. “Is she sitting on another towel?”

“We were afraid she’d show us if we asked.” Jessica looked at Beca. “That’s when Stacie sent me to get you.”

“Why do I have to do it?” Beca knew she was whining but couldn’t help it.

“Because you’re the captain.” Jessica shrugged again. “You can threaten her with cardio if she tries to flash us again.”

“Yeah but Amy doesn’t always listen to me and I don’t want to have flashbacks.” Beca reluctantly headed for the stairs as Jessica started back down.

“Birthday or not…” Chloe muttered as she followed.

“I’m sure Lilly has a hot glue gun you can use,” Beca mused, not surprised to find Ashley hanging out in the hallway when they left the attic.

“Don’t tempt me.” Chloe didn’t say anything else the entire trip down the stairs.

Beca rounded the corner, passing Jessica and Ashley who had stopped in the entry and came to a halt herself, Chloe running into her back.

All she could see was the back of Amy’s head but she appeared to be looking straight at Lilly who sat cross-legged on the ottoman and staring back.

“Do I even want to know?” Beca turned her head toward Jessica but didn’t take her eyes off the scene.

“I didn’t ask that either,” came the whispered reply.

Beca took a bracing breath then walked into the living room. Despite the reassurance that the covering towel existed, Beca didn’t relax until she saw it for herself. It was nothing personal against Amy, but Beca just didn’t want to see any of the Bellas naked, Chloe being the obvious exception. You never knew when the visual would pop back in your head and Amy had already shown up enough in the past few weeks to last a lifetime.

“Amy.” Beca looked up at a sound from the kitchen and saw Stacie leaning in the doorway with Cynthia Rose and Flo sitting at the center island.

“Captain.” Amy didn’t turn her head or avert her gaze.

“Are you guys in a staring contest?” Beca frowned, looking between the two women. “And if so why?”

“I don’t know,” Amy lifted one shoulder. “All I know is she hasn’t blinked since she sat down and why take the risk of losing.”

Beca felt her eyes twitch at the thought. “Jesus, please cut it out before my eyes start watering.” She stepped between them and Amy closed her eyes in relief.

“Thanks, Shawshank. That was starting to burn.” She started to lift one corner of the towel to wipe her eyes and Beca threw out her hand.

“Nope. That stays there.” Chloe said it before Beca could.

“Please tell me you’re sitting on another towel.” Beca sighed and ran her hand through her hair.

“Of course I am!” Amy actually looked indignant. “I’m not a heathen, Beca.” She rolled her eyes. “The pants I want to wear to dinner are tight, so I’m giving my bits time to breathe first.”

“Now that’s in my head.” Cynthia Rose muttered from the kitchen.

“That’s in all our heads,” Ashley said from the doorway behind them.

“You could always wear that blue skirt,” Chloe offered diplomatically. “That way you’re not uncomfortable for your birthday dinner.”

“I do look hot in that.” Amy thought about it while the rest of them made sounds of agreement. “Alright, you’ve swayed me. And as it’s almost that time, guess I’ll go upstairs and change.” She started to stand as Beca moved back then paused. “If you’d all turn around and give me some privacy while I wrap?”

Beca rolled her eyes as she turned to face the front window that, thankfully, had the curtains drawn. “That’s what you get for being half naked in the public areas of the house.”

“I got bored in my room.” Beca heard Amy stand up and the rustle of fabric. “Alright, I’m decent.”

“Hey!”

Beca jumped at the unexpected shout and looked over her shoulder. Stacie had come out of the kitchen and was pointing at the couch.

“That’s my favorite towel!” Outage filled her face. “I was looking for that for over a week!”

“It’s also the softest towel in the house.” Amy said as she picked it up, tucking the other firmly around her waist. “It’s the only thing that doesn’t hurt when I’m sitting.”

A choked sound from behind her brought Beca’s eyes back around to Chloe, who was biting the inside of her cheek and trying not to giggle. “I’m sure she’ll wash it before she gives it back.”

Beca tried to choke back her laugh and ended up sounding like a pug with a cold as she snickered into her hand.

“I think…” Stacie sighed. “Happy Birthday, Amy. It’s all yours.”

“You sure, Stretch?” Amy threw the towel in question over her shoulder. “I don’t think I’ll need it for much longer.”

“Yup.” Stacie nodded emphatically. “I’ll go get another one this weekend.”

“Thanks, Stacie.” Amy smiled at her before her lips twisted slightly. “Sorry I didn’t ask first.”

“’S okay.” Stacie shrugged. “Now go get changed so we can celebrate your day.”

“Are you allowed to give me orders on my birthday?” Amy mused as she headed for the stairs.

“Probably not,” Beca said. “But I’ll probably do it anyway.”

“Bossy.” Chloe whispered behind her and Beca flashed her a grin.

“Alright.” Beca clapped her hands once. “Show’s over, let’s go get our party outfits on and get some grub. We’ve got a Bella to celebrate.”

Stacie walked past her, shaking her head. “Bossy.”

Beca let her head fall back as she stared at the ceiling. “I can’t with you two.”

“What?” Stacie paused in the door to the entry. “Did we do the thing again?”

“Yup.” Chloe pushed Beca toward the stairs. “I called her that thirty seconds ago.” She high fived Stacie over Beca’s shoulder when the tall woman grinned and held out her hand.

“Score one for us.” Stacie laughed and started up the stairs.

“I hate you guys.” Beca said weakly as she followed.

“Liar,” Chloe laughed and ran her hand down Beca’s back.

“Maybe.” Beca let Chloe go before her.

“Definitely.”

“Yeah yeah,” Beca waved her up the stairs, unable to help admiring the way Chloe’s muscles flexed as she moved. “But seriously, my stomach just woke up and if I don’t feed it soon it’s going to take over the world.”

“Aye aye, Captain.” Stacie saluted as she stepped into her room.

“Smartass,” Beca threw back.

“And you love it.” Stacie closed the door with a laugh.

“Stop flirting with Stacie and let’s go change before you get hangry.” Chloe took her hand and tugged on it.

“She wishes,” Beca muttered but followed Chloe up to their room, ignoring the ‘Often’ that came from Stacie’s room behind them.

‘She’s got bat hearing, I swear.’ Beca thought to herself as she went to the closet to get her outfit for the night.

Tomorrow was still looming over them, but Beca pushed it all away, determined to think about Amy and the Bellas for the rest of the night.

It was one mistake and they’d just won three years in a row. Surely they weren’t in that much trouble.

Right?

#bechloe #beca mitchell #chloe beale #all the other bellas #rise 1 #cyc fic tease #cyc motivational seeker

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misscorn · 3 years

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Day 5: Roleswap/Formal

This @takaritsuweek prompt inspired me to do something I've been putting off for years: a rewrite of my fic Stalker-Senpai. So, please enjoy the first chapter :D its pretty much the same except third person now lol, we'll see how much I change in the future!

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It was such a stupid reason to fall in love with someone.

Onodera Ritsu had been struggling to reach a high up book on a shelf, wobbling slightly on his tiptoes for a few brief moments before Saga Masamune decided to intervene, mostly just because something about watching the underclassman struggle was both sad and annoying. The older teen grabbed the book for Ritsu, handing it over with a blank expression.

Ritsu returned the simple, polite gesture with such a wide and sincere smile that Masamune's heart reached incredible speeds that he didn't know were possible. Why is he looking at me like that? Masamune wondered, shifting from one foot to the other, feeling warm from Ritsu's gaze.

Masamune swallowed hard as Ritsu took the book out of his hands and said an enthusiastic thank you, one that was way too cheerful considering all Masamune had done was reach up and grab something. The older boy couldn't help but to notice Ritsu's cheeks were a little red from what he assumed was embarrassment and Masamune suddenly wished to see that adorable expression every day.

God, what am I thinking? Adorable? He's a guy, Masamune hoped none of his thoughts were showing on his face. Apparently they weren't since Ritsu gave a quick and polite nod before scampering off. Masamune found his eyes following the underclassman and his feet almost followed as well. Almost. But Masamune somehow managed to hold on to a string of self control.

All he did was smile and say thank you, why am I acting like such an idiot? I don't even know his name, Masamune silently scolded himself. It was too late, though. Masamune was already on his way to become a hopeless, lovelorn fool.

It didn't take long for Masamune to notice that Ritsu was in the library as often as he was after their minuscule interaction. It was like Ritsu had suddenly appeared and was now here everyday. Not that Masamune was complaining; he found the underclassman's constant presence very comforting.

He reads a new book almost every day. Either he has a short attention span or a lot of time on his hands, Masamune noted. It was quite difficult to keep up with Ritsu's appetite for literature, though Masamune did his best. I want to read all the books that he reads, Masamune thought as he grabbed a novel Ritsu had recently finished. The older teen was hoping that he could use this as a way to get to know Ritsu better. Masamune was particularly ecstatic to learn from his book-stalking that his Kouhai's name was Onodera Ritsu.

The two of them always sat at different tables, but Masamune made sure to keep Ritsu in his sights. Masamune loved seeing the brunette's reactions to what he was reading. At times Masamune would hear a small chuckle leave Ritsu or see Ritsu purse his lips in thought or even see Ritsu rub at his eyes insistently to hide the fact that he was tearing up. I want to know what he's reading, Masamune would think desperately before he was able to get his hands on the book, I want to know what makes him smile and laugh, I want to be the one who makes him smile and laugh. Masamune felt positively pathetic with this train of thought, but he couldn't help himself.

Yes, it was official: Saga Masamune was in love at fifteen years old. He didn't understand how it happened so fast nor did he fully understand why, but he had enough self awareness to realize he was totally whipped for an underclassman who he hadn't even said a single word to.

That was precisely Masamune's problem; talking with people wasn't exactly his forte and he feared that he would somehow scare Ritsu off if he approached him. Not to mention, this feeling of want, this inexplicable desire to hold someone through the night and into the day, this need of seeing someone's face just to feel at ease, all of it was new to Masamune. It was scary to be so enraptured in someone. It was terrifying to know that someone else had so much power over him, power that Ritsu didn't even know he had. If Masamune confessed his feelings, he'd be freely handing that power over and Masamune didn't know if he was even capable of being vulnerable and trusting like that.

It didn't help that watching Ritsu from afar suddenly wasn't entertaining enough for the cruel deity laughing at Masamune's hopelessness. What other possible explanation was there for their paths crossing once again? He had peacefully watched Ritsu and stalked his library cards for three years, but now those days were seemingly over.

Masamune was reaching toward a book when a smaller, more delicate hand came into contact with his. Masamune looked over, his breath catching in his throat at the sight of Ritsu. Ritsu was quick to rip his hand away and met Masamune's eyes with an anxious gaze. Ritsu opened his mouth, looking like he was about to apologize for nothing.

"You can take the book, Onodera." Masamune said quickly before he could speak, not enjoying the sight of Ritsu appearing so guilty and worried. He wanted to alleviate the anxieties clear on Ritsu's face, but he seemed to only make it worse.

"How do you know my name?" Came the quiet, nervous response. The book was quickly forgotten by them both. Masamune felt like he was short-circuiting as he wracked his brain for any possible excuse or lie, but his mouth started moving without his permission.

"I love you."

What?

What the hell did I just say?!

There was a pause between the two of them, the air around Masamune feeling as if it were crushing his bones.

"...eh? Eh?!" Ritsu's face flushed a beautiful shade of red, but Masamune didn't have the time to admire it because he was desperately trying to think of a way to prevent Ritsu from sprinting away.

"What I meant to say was-well-would you want to go out with me sometime?" Masamune asked, watching Ritsu's surprised, flustered expression closely. The brunette shifted uncomfortably from foot to foot, as he opened and closed his mouth, grasping at straws for a response.

"Y-Y-You know I-I'm a guy r-right?" Ritsu finally settled on after a few seconds of awkward silence.

Masamune almost wanted to laugh. Out of all the things Ritsu could've said, that was what he decided on? Masamune's lips quirked up ever so slightly in amusement as he started to find it a little easier to breathe.

"Yeah, I'm aware." Masamune replied dryly. "Does it bother you that I'm a guy?" That had been one of the reasons Masamune had been so hesitant to approach. It was possible that Ritsu wasn't even into guys and now maybe the two of them didn't even have a chance of being friends.

"I-no! Not really? I don't-" Ritsu inched closer and closer to retreating, which simply wouldn't do.

"It's alright, Just take a breath, okay? You don't have to say yes." Masamune quickly assured him, though I really, really want him to say yes, Masamune hoped it didn't show.

"I-I don't even k-know your name..." Ritsu started, seeming to try to find some sort of excuse, perhaps wanting to spare Masamune's feelings instead of outright rejecting him. However, Masamune's heart was stubborn and dead set on Ritsu. He wouldn't be dissuaded easily and not knowing his name was an easy fix.

"It's Saga. Saga Masamune."

Ritsu nodded slowly, visibly swallowing as he wrung his hands, seeming to be carefully considering his next few words.

"O-O-Okay...I-I'll go out with you...Saga Senpai..."

When an upperclassman grabbed a book for Ritsu and handed it over he was grateful for a few seconds, but forgot about the interaction quickly. It had been nothing particularly special after all. If there was anything he did remember from the brief conversation-if one could even call it that-it was that he felt terribly embarrassed for being too short to reach a book. And then a certain name started to pop up everywhere...

Ritsu scanned the shelves for a new read, not looking for anything in particular, just something unfamiliar and fresh. He started to reach for one when a larger hand met his and he instinctively recoiled away from the touch as if it had burned him. He looked over to see an older student that was often slinking around the library, somehow always seeming to have a certain aura of sadness around him.

"You can take the book, Onodera." He told Ritsu quickly, his expression blank and unreadable.

"How do you know my name?" Ritsu asked hesitantly, though he already knew the answer. This is my stalker. Saga Masamune, Ritsu felt nervous now that he was face to face with him. Ritsu had been ignoring the behavior for the longest time, three years in fact, but now his stalker was right in front of him.

Ritsu often liked to reread books that he particularly connected with and it didn't take long for him to realize a certain name kept appearing and reappearing underneath his own.

Saga Masamune.

Ritsu didn't know anything about this 'Saga' person. He was far too shy to ever venture out to try to talk to many people, especially an upperclassman. He was still young and fresh enough to high school to think that upperclassmen were untouchable Gods. Though, after noticing the name he also noticed that a certain upperclassman was constantly in the library: the one that had helped Ritsu grab a book. Ritsu decided he was as good as a suspect as anyone to be his stalker. It wasn't like many other students spent hours upon hours in the school's library. To confirm his suspicion, Ritsu once quietly walked up to his table when he had fallen asleep sitting up and took the opportunity to look in the back of his book. There was his name: Saga Masamune. The upperclassman shifted and Ritsu took that as his que to quickly put the book back down and retreat.

Ritsu tried to ignore it, not understanding Masamune's motives or actions and wondering if perhaps he was looking a little too much into it. That was, until the two had bumped into each other again.

"I love you." Masamune said.

Ritsu's heart punched the inside of his rib cage before beating erratically in all directions. A confession had been about the last thing he was expecting.

"...eh? Eh?!" Is all Ritsu could choke out in response with his legs feeling weak yet also prepared to sprint a mile if necessary.

"What I meant to say was-well-would you want to go out with me sometime?" Masamune asked, but Ritsu's confusion didn't cease.

"Y-Y-You know I-I'm a guy r-right?" That question sounded much dumber out loud than it did in my head, Ritsu thought as he refrained from facepalming. Masamune smirked a bit at his question and Ritsu tried not to frown, feeling like he was being made fun of and this confession had perhaps been a joke of some sort to mess with him.

"Yeah, I'm aware. Does it bother you that I'm a guy?"

Ritsu struggled to swallow as he started to shake his head. "I-no! Not really? I don't-" He wanted to hide behind the bookshelves at this point and forget this entire conversation.

"It's alright, Just take a breath, okay? You don't have to say yes."

"I-I don't even k-know your name..." Ritsu lied, wanting to somehow escape this situation.

"It's Saga. Saga Masamune." He replied smoothly. The upperclassman obviously didn't see their lack of knowledge of one another as an issue and suddenly Ritsu was out of excuses.

I should say I don't like guys, or that not interested, or that I have a girlfriend, Ritsu thought, but instead he just gulped nervously and nodded slowly.

"O-O-Okay...I-I'll go out with you...Saga Senpai..."

Why did I say that, why did I agree to this, what am I going to do now, oh God, I bet this really is just a joke and he's going to start laughing at me now, if my parents find out about this I'm completely done for-, Ritsu's panicked thoughts continued to race, but stopped once a gentle hand reached up to ruffle his hair.

And that was how the wonderful, complicated mess of their relationship started.

#onodera ritsu #saga masamune #sekaiichi hatsukoi #takaritsuweek #fanfiction

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duelistkingdom · 3 years

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you’d come back to me

chapter seventeen: closure

[first chapter] [previous chapter] [master list] [read on ao3]

Summary: Seto Kaiba has been presumed dead for four years after the events of Dark Side of Dimensions. His return causes both unresolved feelings of grief to be brought to the surface and the past to be dragged right back up. In hopes of helping Seto move on and reintegrate back into society at large, Mokuba asks Yugi to work on Spherium II with Seto. Never one to leave a friend hanging, Yugi agrees. Over the course of the project, Seto and Yugi both come to terms with their mutual grief and grow towards a better understanding of each other.

Rating: T

Ships: Yugi Mutou/Seto Kaiba, Mokuba Kaiba/Rebecca Hopkins, Katusya Jonouchi/Mai Kujaku

Warnings: aged up characters, grief, references to suicide

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Being reinstated as CEO of Kaiba Corp felt strange to Seto. Mokuba had stated that it was overdue, admitting he didn’t like being CEO anyway. Spherium II was due to be launched any day now and it reminded Seto of another old project that was time to let go of. He walked through Kaiba Corp and examined the walls of the office, noting Mokuba’s changes to the building. He no longer felt like he was on the outside looking in. This wasn’t the abstract idea of the future anymore - it was real and here. The doors to where the AI of the Pharaoh rested opened in front of him and he examined the area.

Nothing had changed in the past five years that he could note. It was almost as if this entire room went unused. Seto supposed that made sense considering the fact that Yugi had been surprised to find the AI in the first place. He strode up to the computers, pulling up the code that had been the basis for Duel Links and now Spherium II. It was an impressive bit of coding that he had built five years ago but technology marches forward. It was no longer the most impressive thing he’d done. To be expected, of course.

Seto examined how the Pharaoh - he caught himself. This was not the Pharaoh and he finally allowed himself to think the name that matched to his former rival. Atem. He understood why Yugi’s additions made Atem’s reactions more lifelike now. Kaiba had once assumed that dueling meant he fully understood everything about a person. He’d been proven wrong and he was grateful for it. In a way, the best thing to do to prove he was ready to move forward would be to shut it down.

Still, he couldn’t just shut it down. Not after everything he’d done to make this possible. His finger hovered over the button and he thought more about what his therapist had told him. To stop and think about what he was actually feeling, to try to name each emotion. He tried to remember the names of the feelings he was having. The truth was that he always had felt emotion - he just never fully understood what each one was so it was easier to ignore them. One of them was sorrow. That much he was certain of. It ripped up through his stomach and clenched at his heart in a way that was painful. He knew each emotion had a physical reaction and describing the physical reaction often led to understanding the emotional tie.

Closure. That was the word he had been looking for since Atem had left this mortal plane for the afterlife. Kaiba had been denied it and now he was starting to pull the pieces of himself back together. He’d been ripped apart at the seams and was starting to stitch himself back together. A void had been filled that he didn’t know had been there. He’d been filled with so much spite and anger and hatred. Part of that was still there but it didn’t dominate his life the way it once had. It no longer had a hold over him. What had helped was the assurance that was okay to be angry over these circumstances he’d been given. He’d been thrusted into a role he’d been wholly unprepared for at only fifteen. Now he was still trying to adjust to the fact he’d never been allowed a childhood.

Seto sighed as he moved away from the option to completely wipe it away and stepped away from the console as he looked up over the room. Vast, empty, white, and a fresh slate. It allowed his mind to wander back to his childhood. No matter how fucked up it had been, it had been a childhood. He couldn’t rewrite the past and he could no longer run from it. He had to embrace everything that made him who he was. He’d been so certain that he’d been doomed to damage everyone around him, that he could never grow. He could wallow in that feeling.

Instead of doing that, he pulled his phone out and almost grinned at the mere notice that Yugi was still messaging him on that kc_blimp account despite the fact the mystery was now gone. A small smile crossed his face as he’d thought about how Yugi admitted later that was how he knew to go to Seto’s apartment when he had. It’d been a lifeline he didn’t know he needed. He dialed Yugi’s number as he stared at the code that had been the basis for both Spherium II and Duel Links immersive play styles. When Yugi answered, Kaiba was at a loss for words.

“Seto,” Yugi prompted. “You called me. That usually means there’s something you want to talk about, right?”

Kaiba nodded before remembering that this phone call didn’t include video. “Yes,” he said as he cleared his throat, trying to get his thoughts together. Where did he begin? “I’m in front of the AI of Atem and… I was thinking that maybe you might want to be here for the shutdown? To... Say goodbye, as it were.”

Yugi was silent on the other end and for a second, Seto thought maybe he said something wrong. “Seto, I said goodbye to Atem five years ago during one of the worst days of my life,” Yugi said gently, as if to assure Seto that he hadn’t done anything wrong by asking. Still, Kaiba couldn’t help but feel a little scolded regardless of how gentle Yugi was. “Unless there’s something else?”

Seto felt put on the spot as he tried to figure out exactly what to say next. Yugi was right - it had been a flimsy excuse and Seto scolded himself for giving such a flimsy excuse for something that he needed Yugi to be here for. It was hard for him to figure out the words to what he needed. Finally, Seto admitted quietly, “I need you here.”

There was another moment of agonizing silence that allowed Seto to overthink every single aspect of what Yugi could possibly be thinking. Was it that Yugi thought he was weak? He hated the idea of Yugi knowing that he could be weak even now. It felt strange to be so vulnerable and he wished he could cram the words back into his mouth. “Oh,” Yugi finally said and Seto started to over analyze the tone that Yugi used. “Of course. I’ll be over there in a moment, Seto. Do you want me to stay on the line while I head up?”

Kaiba shook his head before once again remembering that he couldn’t avoid voicing what he wanted to say. Yet again he was thinking of how Yugi could see right through him. If he said no, would Yugi be able to tell that Kaiba very much did want him to stay on the line? The desire was there and yet he’d been vulnerable enough to even admit that he needed Yugi there at all. He needed time that he did not have. It seemed like time would always remain this cruel and not allow him what he needed to process what he was thinking. “Yes,” he admitted despite himself. “I want you to stay.”

“I’ll stay as long as you need, Seto,” Yugi said so gently that Kaiba was dizzy instantly. How could Yugi remain this kind after everything he’d put him through? He’d never been one to truly be the level of vulnerability that Yugi deserved. Seto was incapable of the kind of courage that Yugi displayed on a daily basis. He couldn’t give Yugi the peace that he deserved. He kept dredging up the past that Yugi deserved to have buried. And yet Yugi was still here, despite everything. “Do you want to tell me what made you decide now was the time to shut down the AI?”

The first question that Yugi asked and Seto couldn’t answer him. It felt like Yugi was asking so little and yet Seto couldn’t bridge that. Despite everything, Yugi was still there on the other end, despite how little Seto could bring himself to say. “I just thought it was time,” Seto said, rather clipped. “It is… unnecessary.”

Once again, Kaiba was left to wonder what each of Yugi’s silences meant. What each soft sigh on the other end meant. He wondered if this would ever change or if he could simply never give Yugi any sense of peace. “I see,” Yugi said, and once again Kaiba was struck by the gentleness in his tone. He was not used to it. He wanted so badly to get used to it, however. “So you’re ready to let go, then?”

How did Yugi do that? How did Yugi always manage to strike right into the heart of the issue even before Kaiba could figure out what he was thinking? It was unnerving. Yugi never let Kaiba keep things cradled close to his chest. Instead, Yugi demanded openness that Seto felt odd about giving. “I want to be ready,” came the more honest answer. It was impossible to not be honest with Yugi as Seto was discovering. It was like he could not give less than a hundred percent of his honor. Yugi had managed to knock down his walls and Seto had no intention of putting them back up again. “I can’t keep this around and move forward with you.”

There was a hitch in Yugi’s breath. For a minute, Seto thought he must have said something wrong and then Yugi sounded overly emotional as he said, “Oh, Seto.” Once again, Seto didn’t fully understand until Yugi elaborated, “I’m glad that you’re committed to this.”

Was that what this was? He supposed that was the case. Seto had been one foot out the door for so long that it felt strange to be fully planted back on Earth. Moving forward was hard enough. He turned and there was Yugi standing in the doorway, his phone to his ear. For a minute, neither of them moved. Seto took the first step forward and Yugi met him, pulling him into a tight embrace as their phones clattered to the floor. “I’m glad you’re here,” Seto admitted, allowing himself to be overwhelmed by emotions he’d rather not feel. “I can’t do this without you.”

Yugi pressed a gentle kiss to Seto’s cheek, just a little lower than the center of his cheek. “I’m here,” Yugi assured, his fingers tangling with Seto’s. It struck Seto how well his hand fit in Yugi’s, as if Yugi’s hand had always been made for him to hold. How could he have missed it all this time? How could he have missed that Yugi was always the one there for him in the weakest moments? It had been Yugi who had visited him in the hospital when Seto’s heart had been shattered into pieces, supporting his growth. It had always been him. It was a shame it had taken him so long to realize this. “I’ll always be here for you as long as you’ll have me.”

“You’ve always been there,” Seto stated and Yugi seemed surprised by the matter of fact statement and how sure Seto was of it. He regretted that this ever would seem like a surprise to Yugi. He regretted all the hurt he’d ever caused and yet, he knew that he couldn’t change it. All he could do now was do his best to make it up to Yugi. And he had so much time to do so. “I’m sorry it took me so long to see that.”

“It’s okay,” Yugi said even though it wasn't okay. He’d been so dismissive and he didn’t know how he could have been. Still, he was grateful that Yugi remained steadfast to the idea that the past was entirely in the past. “Shall we?”

Seto nodded and the two of them approached the AI’s programming. As much as Seto would miss it, he couldn’t ignore the fact that it would be good to say goodbye to it. It was a relic of the past, one he couldn’t keep if he was going to move forward. Yugi’s hand was firm as he finally shut it down. He thought of Alcatraz and all the relics of the past that he’d burned before this. He couldn’t get Alcatraz back and he won’t be able to get this back, either. However, in their place stood shining new beacons of the future.

Seto didn’t know where the future was going to take him anymore. He didn’t know what it meant to be in a real relationship. He certainly didn’t understand the concept of the family that Yugi brought with him. Despite all of this, he was eager to actually learn for once. He could imagine a future on this plane of existence now. There were no guarantees of where life would take him and at one point, that might have terrified him. Now he greeted it as a challenge, and a welcome one at that.

Yugi’s hand squeezed his hand and brought Seto back out of his thoughts. There was a soft smile on Yugi’s face and a look of concern hiding behind his wide, violet gaze. Instead of feeling like Yugi was mocking him, Seto understood now. “I’m fine,” Seto said softly. “I’m with you.”

The nod and determined grin caused Seto’s heart to skip a beat. He understood what that was now. He understood so much more now. Rather than his usual optimistic speeches, Yugi leaned into Seto and they walked into the future together.

#rivalshipping #rivalshipping fanfiction #myfanfic #fanfic: you'd come back to me #holy shit... it's finished #fic: you'd come back to me

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anxiousstark · 4 years

Text

S2 02 | Shape Shifted

BIG MASTERLIST | TW REWRITE

Stiles Stilinski x Reader! Half-sibling!Mccall Word count: 2736 Warnings: Mentions of dead bodies, injuries, blood, angst, swearing (always). A/N: I’m not really proud of this chapter. It is fast and not too long. At first, I thought about skipping it, but I totally needed it to be able to introduce Isaac Lahey. Furthermore, the black backpack it’s truly important for Y/N’s past with her mother, and for her relationship with Scott!

↪ PLEASE RESPECT MY WORK. DON’T COPY, TRANSLATE OR CLAIM THEM AS YOURS. NOT ON THIS WEBSITE OR ANOTHER. ALL RIGHTS ARE RESERVED.

"Scott told me you weren't coming today." Allison stared at me, concerned.

"What's the point of staying at home?" I chuckled. I didn't remember anything about last night. I had this uneasy feeling, but I couldn't recall anything. I remembered running after Lydia when she escaped from the hospital's window, and the next thing I was lying down on my bed after being found in the woods. "Melissa will kill me when she finds out I'm not home." I laughed.

"Oh, she will kill you." My half-brother's girlfriend smiled, clutching her books against her chest. "Stiles told me that you guys are better than ever." She blushed, nodding. "I hope you guys stay like that. Scott glares at me less when you guys are together." I smirked. It was true. Scott seemed to be calmer when he was in good terms with Allison.

"I need to go grab some books from my locker." She kissed Lydia's cheek, who had been quiet most of the time. "See you guys later." She side-hugged me.

"They called it a fugue state, which is basically a way of saying ‘We have no idea why you can't remember running through the woods naked," Lydia said while I opened the door for her. "But personally, I don't care. I lost nine pounds." She giggled.

"We were out there for almost an entire day," I answered back. "Isn't it crazy that we don't remember anything that happened during the time we were wandering around?"

"As I said before," She retouched her lipstick. "I lost nine pounds." I saw Jackson a couple of meters away from us, Lydia was walking directly to him. But his eyes were fixed on me while he smirked.

"Do your ears and nose bleed a lot?"

Fuck you, Jackson.

I walked to the bleachers, sitting down behind Scott and Stiles. Again, I was surprised that Scott was a werewolf because he hadn't noticed me as he was too busy talking to his friend. I got closer to them. "Boo." Both boys jumped, terrified. Their screams were so high pitched that half of the lacrosse team were staring at us. They both turned around to look at me. "Oh god, that was so fucking fu-"

Two arms wrapped around me, Stiles. Now, I was almost sitting on his lap, arms wrapped tightly around my waist, his face hiding on my neck. At first, I didn't know how to react, but I ended up wrapping my arms around him too. My right hand rubbed his back while the other rested on the back of his neck, pulling him closer to me, which seemed almost impossible. "I'm sorry." He whispered.

"For what?"

He sighed, his warm breath caressing the side of my neck, making me shiver. "I'm sorry for leaving you at the dance just to go with Lydia." His voice cracked.

"Stiles, we talked about this." I rubbed his back in circles. "It was your opportunity to get close to Lydia." Forming those words made my heart throb, but I continued. "You don't have to apologize for something your heart was telling you to do."

"My heart was confused." He whispered. "And because of that, you got hurt."

"It wasn't your fault." My fingers caressed his buzz-cut hair. "You didn't hit me, Chris Argent did."

"He could have killed you if he wanted. He didn't do it because you are of value. Because you are something that interests him." He clenched his jaw. "He could have killed you if he wanted to." Stiles paused. "And I never thanked you for saving me from Peter Hale back at the hospital."

"Anyone would have done that for you, Stilisnki."

We heard someone cough, and we decided it was time to part ways. Even though I didn't want to. Stupid Scott.

You know when you shower and wear clean clothes. You get inside your bed with fresh sheets. The smell and freshness embrace you, and you feel safe. That's exactly what I felt in Stiles's arms.

"Uhm. So what about the plan?" Stiles stopped looking deeply into my eyes to glance at Scott, who had interrupted us.

"What plan?" I curiously asked, sitting next to Stiles.

"There seems to be another wolf in the lacrosse team." The Hazel-eyed boy explained to me. "I told coach you're switching with Danny for the day."

"But I hate playing goal."

"Remember when I said I had an idea? This is the idea."

"Oh." He didn't understand. "What's the idea?"

"I seriously don't understand how you survive without me sometimes." He shook his head. "McCall's will always need me."

Coach called the entire lacrosse team. Stiles was the first one to go back to the field while Scott stopped to look at me. "Uhm, I hope you feel better."

"Did Melissa tell you to say that?" I jokingly asked.

"Actually, yes." He grinned when he saw how my face went back to a serious one. "I'm kidding. I really hope you feel better."

I nodded, smiling. "Thank you." I looked at him directly on the eyes. "And thank you for finding me."

"It wasn't me." He pointed at Stiles when he saw my confused expression. "It was him." Then he sighed. "And please, I can smell you guys."

"Smell what? I got showered so you can't joke about me smelling or something because I promise you I will kill you."

"No," He chuckled. "I smell Stiles." He paused. "And you, you know."

"No, I don't." He groaned, going back to the field, murmuring something about it 'not being his job'.

It seems like Stiles's plan was for Scott to throw every lacrosse player to the ground, smelling them to make sure that they were not a werewolf.

I was confused when in the distance, I saw Sheriff Stilisnki marching towards the field.

The match had been stopped by the police. "His father's dead. They think he was murdered."

"Are they saying he's a suspect?" Noah Stilisnki softly grasped Isaac's arm, letting him know that he had to go with them to the station. He was a major suspect. "Because they can lock him in a holding cell for 24 hours." Scott was still trying to understand what Stiles was trying to say. "During the full moon."

"How good are these holding cells at holding people?"

"People, good. Werewolves, probably not that good."

Isaac followed the sheriff's orders, but before completely disappearing from our sight, he turned around, looking at the other werewolf boy. "Stiles, remember when I said I don't have the urge to maim and kill?"

Stiles nodded.

"He does." I interrupted Scott. I could also feel it. I could feel the rage. He was going to explode.

After what happened in the field, we had to go to class with Mr. Harris. I didn't fancy that man, he made me feel quite uncomfortable, and his subject was monotonous.

"Why would Derek choose Isaac?" I heard Scott whisper. Both boys were sitting in front of me while I was sitting behind them, in front of Danny boy.

"Peter told me that if the bite doesn't turn you it could kill you. And maybe teenagers have a better chance of surviving."

"Doesn't being a teenager mean your dad can't hold him?"

"Well, not unless they have solid evidence. Or a witness. Wait." Stiles turned around, he offered me a little smile, making my heart beat like crazy. "Danny. Where's Jackson?"

"In the principal's office talking to your dad." My interest peaked when I heard what he had said.

"What? Why?"

"Maybe because he lives across the street from Isaac."

The hazel-eyed boy who only liked to get into trouble glanced at Scott and me. "We gotta get to the principal's office."

"How?"

I saw Stiles ripping a blank page from his notebook, shaping a not-so-round ball with it. "Everyone please turn to page 73." Mr. Harris was writing on the blackboard when the paper ball hit the back of his head. "Who in the hell did that?" Both troublemakers pointed at each other. Oh god.

Gosh, Mr. Stilisnki was right. I would only be into trouble if I went along with Scott and Stiles. But I couldn't let these two fools get themselves killed. I quickly made a paper ball, throwing it at Mr. Harris, hitting him directly on the nose. Classmates started snickering while Scott and Stiles glanced at me perplexed, but with grins on their faces. "Damn guys, I thought you said we were throwing them at the count of three." I winked at them.

However, Mr. Harris didn't seem to find it hilarious as he sent the three of us to detention. We were sitting outside when Stiles's dad came out. He hid his face behind my back, in hopes that his father wouldn't see him. Stiles under pressure was as dumb as Scott in his daily life.

"Scott." Sheriff Stilisnki greeted him. Then, he looked at his son, letting a sigh of defeat leave his mouth. "Y/N," He also greeted me. "How is that wound?"

"What wound?" I smiled, letting him know that I was feeling just fine.

He grinned back. "Good. I'm happy for you." He crossed his arms, telling his coworkers to go ahead. "I suppose you three are here to go into detention." I bit my lower lip while Scott nodded. Stiles still hiding his face behind my back. "Well, Y/N, you aren't going."

I gazed at him, utterly confused.

Stiles finally decided to stop using me as a shield. "Oh, wow-Dad! What a surprise!" Mr. Stilisnki, Scott, and I rolled our eyes. Sometimes, Stiles could be a complete fool. "Why isn't she going?"

I swallowed. I could feel both boys gazing at me.

"It isn't an interrogation, don't worry." Noah intervened. "But we need you to come back to the station. It is quite important, Y/N." I couldn't help but glance at Stiles, my anxiety going up as seconds when by. Why did they need me at the police station?

Stiles smiled at me, but I could see that he was as nervous and bewildered as me. "You are lucky," He punched me lightly on the arm. "You skip this stupid long detention." He moved a strand of hair away from my face. "And you are going to be with the coolest Sheriff of the city." He winked at his dad.

"We will still talk about this at home, Stiles." He smirked. "Come get her at the station when you finish whatever you did."

The hazel-eyed boy pouted, conducting his gaze to me. "Seems like it's going to be a long day for both of us." He muttered.

"Do you want anything to drink or eat?" Noah Stilinski took a seat in front of me. We were separated by a metal table. I shook my head while placing my hands on top of the cold surface. "I know you must be nervous about me taking you here without giving you any hint."

"And I'm in the interrogation room, so I'm even more nervous." I chuckled. "Please, go directly to the reason that made me be here."

"Do you remember Sheriff Posey? Back where you used to live?" He slid a picture of said Sheriff so I could see at him.

I nodded my head. I didn't remember much of him, but he saved my life a couple of times and did his best to snap Alice back to real life. Of course, it didn't work. "He was the one who 'took care' of Ali- my mom's situation."

Noah nodded. "He is gonna retire due to some health inconveniences."

"I hope he is okay," I sincerely expressed my feelings. "But what does that have to do with me?"

Sheriff Stilinski sighed, pulling something that was under the table, letting it fall on top of it. A black backpack. "Do you recognize this bag?" I shook my head. "Sherrif Posey had it for a long time, he wanted to wait until you were older." His eyes searched deep in mines. "This is the bag your mother took to jail. It was given to Sheriff Posey when-"

"When she killed herself." I finished for him. No tears. But my hands were full of sweat.

"Inside the bag, there are items she took to jail, and the ones they let her keep." He sighed. "Of course, those who work in jails must be strict about what inmates can keep. There won't be much, maybe a couple of pictures, something that reminded her of the outside world. Sheriff Posey thought you should be the one deciding what to do with all of this."

He slid the bag towards me. "I don't want it." I was surprised. My voice didn't creak. "You can throw it away."

He sorrowfully smiled. "I had a feeling you would say that." He coughed a little. "I've been following your case since my friend Posey told me about you. I know how much you went through, from an outsider point of view." I nodded, he was the first person who talked to me that way. It was nice, and it made me think of Stiles. "I'm still gonna give you this bag. Do whatever you want with it." I glanced at the bag, nodding. "You can take your time with it. It isn't a decision you must take right away."

My eyes glistened while I peered at him. "They re-opened the case, right?" My voice came out in a whisper. "Her family re-opened the case, right?"

Noah nodded. "It wasn't your fault, okay? They are a heart-broken family. What they went through...nobody should have to experience that. But it wasn't your fault, and the judge gave you the reason." He grabbed my hands, his thumbs caressing the back of my hands. "You have all of us now."

After the conversation with Mr. Stilinski, he made me wait in his office, telling me to feel comfortable while I waited for Stiles to come for me. I was sitting on a couch, my eyes examining the black bag that used to be the most precious thing that my mother ever had. Funny, right?

The door opened, and I was met with Stiles. He smiled when he saw me, and I did the same. "Finally!" I got up from the couch. "I'm so tired. I want to go home."

When I saw his nervous laugh I concluded that we weren't going home yet. "I need to grab the keys of every cell in the station. There's a dude dressed as an officer who wants to kill Lahey. Also, seems like Isaac was being abused by his father, Scott is in his old house, trying to investigate and Derek is flirting with the receptionist. Well, distracting her, you know."

"Okay, so where are the keys?"

Stiles walked to a little grey box that was on the wall, introducing a code. But when it opened, it was empty. "Fuck, someone already got to them." Stiles ran out of the office without waiting for me.

"Yo, wait." I grabbed the backpack, throwing it over my shoulder. When I heard the fire alarm, I started running. "Stiles! Stiles?"

In a couple of seconds, I was able to find him. His back was against the wall while he looked ahead. Isaac Lahey has escaped from his cell, and he was fighting with a man that was dressed as an officer. Isaac grabbed the head of the fraudulent officer, slamming him against the wall. Then, he turned around, looking at Stiles. He moved to get closer to him, stopping when I firmly hissed at him. Nails coming out, ice-blue eyes and scales decorating from my wrist to elbow. He felt threatened but still tried to attack me until Derek appeared.

"How did you do that?"

"I'm the Alpha."

Derek left, taking Isaaw with him before the other officers came to the room due to the alarm. Stiles rushed to me. "Are you okay?" I nodded. "You need to calm down. The scales are still out."

I glanced at my arms. "I don't know how to control it. It just happens." He nodded while talking his plaid off, helping me wear it. We were interrupted by coughs. Uh oh, Sheriff Stilinski and other officers were looking at us.

I peered at Stiles while he looked at the man laying on the floor. "Uh," He pointed to the man. "He did it."

TAGLIST: @og-baby-ob14 - @savemypostcards - @cas-loves-pizza - @used-avocado - @mvrylee - @bilesxbilinskixlahey - @honeydoll-stark - @arieltheworldisamess - @softpeteparker - @kit-kat-katie99 - @thatsuperherosidekick - @bexbetterxthanxwords - @big-galaxy-chaos - @littlemiss-forgotten - @enchantedcruelsummer - @coldfreakeggsexpert - @merla123 - @sammypotato67 - @weirdowithnobeardo - @maggiesblogsblog - @itskindyl - @bobo-bush - @moongoddesskiana - @multifandxm353 - @irwxnhugsx - @xoprincessmel - @iclosetgeek - @andreagf956 - @niawoods - @anerroroccurrrrred - @perrytheplatypus11 - @trustfundparker - @nmriia - @steve-harringtonnn - @trustfundparker -

People in black means it doesn’t let me tag them.

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vendettaparker · 3 years

Text

Where’s My Love? (Teaser #2): I Lie Awake [T.H]

Summary: Tom can never escape his greatest blunder, the one that cost him everything.

Word Count: 400

Warnings: Poetic Angst

a/n: i hate to be that bitch, but chapter one is almost done and i don’t like it so i’m gonna rewrite it :/. i will leave a lot of the dialogue and plot, but it feels too rushed to me so i just need a cleaner slate. i also have a lot more time on my hands and i feel way more comfortable in my writing, so it shouldn’t be another 2 months, but who knows

Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist

✼ •• ┈┈┈┈๑⋅⋯ ୨˚୧ ⋯⋅๑┈┈┈┈ •• ✼

“Tom.” Your voice whispered in his ear, taunting him. Reminding him of what he lost. What he couldn’t save. The only one he couldn't save. The only one he needed to save.

“I’m right here, Tommy.” You never ceased. You constantly called to him as he tried his best to put his tortuous thoughts to rest. You stood over him, eyes wide in fear. You watched him, and you whispered.

“Tommy, why couldn’t you save me?”

You broke his heart all over again every night.

He sat up in his bed, body wet with sweat and eyes clouded with tears.

“(Y/N). Please, darling,” he begged, “I tried, please, I’m still trying.” You walked over and stood right above him, face inches apart. It was almost as if he could smell the sweet scent of flowers on you. The orchids and daisies you loved so much wafting over him, calming him. Until your cold, dead grip latched onto his shoulder.

“You failed, my love.”

Tom woke with a start, screaming and crying into the empty abyss of his room. You were nowhere to be found. He couldn’t take it anymore. He needed you back. You needed to come home and never leave his side ever again. If he had to spend one more day without you, he’d lose it. He’d become the monster he felt like on the inside. All the dark, twisty despair holed up in his heart would rush out in acts of unchecked rage and violence. He was never the villain, but he would be.

He couldn’t follow through with his promise to Harrison. He couldn't just move on and pretend that life made any sense without you, because it didn’t. Nothing made sense, and everything hurt.

Zeus created humans to have another half, and they would spend the rest of their lives if they had to, searching for it. You were Tom’s, and you were ripped away from him. That just won’t do.

He couldn’t spend another night lying awake, thoughts ripping apart his mind. He couldn’t sleep either, or else he’d see you. See what you’ve become. A ghost of happier times. A reminder of what never was and never will be. A figment of his ill fated mind.

Tags: @justapurrcat @keithseabrook27

#tom holland #tom holland x reader #tom holland angst #tom holland au #tom holland x y/n #tom holland smut #tom holland fluff

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thelostguardianau · 4 years

Text

The Lost Guardian- Chapter Eight

“Heed the Silenced”

(Authors note: aha.. yknow I should probably stop making promises for this fic. Months later, w/ a chapter that doesn’t have Thomas in it, three different outlines down and i’m really just at the mercy of this fic at this point xD considering midway through writing this chapter I had to cut and rewrite an entire scene i’d spent a month on bc I’d decided that Dee had a chance at redemtion that added an actual direction and a tangable end goal to this story. So. Yeah. And!! A loud Thank You!! to @bumblebeekitten for helping me bounce ideas back & forth for this au and being my beta for this chapter!!)

Character Info & Art:

Chapter Seven | Chapter Nine

Fandom: Thomas Sanders Sides

Pairings: Eventual Polyamsanders (LAMPR/CALMR-a.k.a LAMP/CALM + Remy ‘Sleep’ Sanders)

Warnings: THIS CHAPTER IS KINDA DIALOG HEAVY!(sorry) Currently depicted as morally grey Deceit(subject to change in future chapters), though the side of Deceit from his first appearance doesnt make an appearance in this chapter and it is explained why, mentions of past betrayal and dark descriptions of bodily concepts, curses, limitations, and changes only really explained as possible through the lore of this au. Deceit speaks in riddles because he has to, ominous warnings. Virgil still isn’t okay mentally. Mentions of indifference to death, lack of selfworth or self preservation. (Let me know if I need to add anything!)

[[MORE]]

Brown eyes flutter open at the chilly breeze of a fan, and the ravenette’s mind comes to realize that he’s been moved from resting on his stomach to laying on his back. Groggy from his much too short nap, it takes a few moments to realize there are no warm bodies near him or under him, no breathing or chatter of familiar voices to sooth him.

The room, he realizes, is empty.

The room itself is, in fact, not Remy’s bedroom at all.

Shooting straight up, Virgil’s first clear thought is that he’s back at home. At his apartment, this time in his hoodie yet still roughed up from his latest ‘adventure’. The scene is eerily familiar, and yet he knows this time that work is not where he needs to be. It’s already daylight and his mind now knows this familiar scene, he should feel alone. Yet, this time he can hear the sound of honking cars and people, his loud neighbor from upstairs stomping around.

It doesn’t make sense as he walks to his window and peers out to see vague cars and people, he can’t even seem to make out any individual faces. It’s grey and raining outside, but there is no pattering sound against the foggy window. ‘What’s happening?’ Virgil wonders.

“Life seemed so simple a week ago, even months ago, did it not..?” A familiar voice drifts from behind him. Ice cold fear shoots down the ravenette’s spine as he recognizes the voice.

“I can hardly believe you were able to leave it, your routine. It was your everything, back when you came to terms with what you had left. Am I wrong, Virgil?” Whirling around to face the voice, Virgil finds the terrifying ex-Guardian sitting on his couch looking quite at home, if a little sheepish.

“What do you care?” He spat back, stepping back against his window.

“I am only looking out for you, you know. I have been protecting you all your life. Of all people I think I would know what is best for you, don't you think? We are connected after all, you and I.” The man sighed, making a surrendering motion with his hands.

“Why would I trust you?! You tried to kill me yesterday!” Virgil growled. “Why--h-how are you even here!?”

“False, my dear Virgil. I tried to warn you. Sure,” The guardian rolled his hand as he spoke, “I am forced to have a round-about way of speaking my truths, it is just part of my consequences it seems. But how else was I going to get you to listen to me after the others fed you lies about me? I do sincerely apologize for my other half being rough, though. I cannot quite.. Control.. Him.” The guardian tilted his bowler hat down to guiltily hide his eyes, regret briefly twisting his expression.

Finally the Guardian stood, dusting himself off as if his immaculate attire had acquired dust from just existing in his apartment. “I needed my physical body to reach yours and make our soul connection strong again, so that my soul could reach yours. However.. The pain I caused you was far from my intention. I am deeply regretful that it came down to.. That awful encounter.

“To answer your question though, Virgil, I am here because I created ‘here’. A realm made to form this illusion of being home, sweet home, just on the corner of the little street you had come to live on for the past year. It is all my doing. Where you stand is simply an illusion only you and I can access, a manipulation of your dreams and memories. The only place where the real me can talk to you mostly unhindered.” The guardian gestured to his surroundings.

“It takes only one person to flip your life on it’s head, a matter of hours to make the decision of a lifetime, and a matter of days to have completely changed your life’s direction,” He turned to Virgil, and looked him straight in the eyes, feeling distant and lost.

“And only a matter of years to succumb to the depression of the lonely consequences..”

Virgil blinked at that. The sad, longing tone had him thrown for a loop; it almost felt like the Guardian wasn't even quite talking to Virgil. “I-What..? I.. I don’t understand.”

The Guardian shook his head, snapping out of it and refocusing himself. "Nevermind that. It is time I talked to you for real, if you will have me?" The Guardian held out a hand politely, though there was no real expectation for Virgil to take it.

After a pause, Virgil gave a slight nod, still suspicious of the other's intent. The Guardian returned the nod, and his hand fell to his side.

“I am limited to the time that you rest and for now I will not be able to explain myself thoroughly, so, I ask you to understand that I do not expect you to trust me when I am done. I honestly do not expect you to ever trust me. With the mistakes I have made, I firmly believe I would not deserve it.”

Virgil blinked in surprise, not having expected his captor to admit to his faults straight off the bat.

“Okay.. Well, we’re here, might as well hear your side of the story. So.. Shoot.” Virgil said lightly, distrust and suspicion still evident in his tone and stance.

“I would assume at this point you are well aware of how the story you have been told paints me as the villain, a mastermind seeking power, immortality, and revenge? At least, that is what I am led to believe is still the story, it has been many years since I have heard the tale first hand… And... Well. Would that not be so lovely?” Virgil made a face, eyes narrowing in confusion.

“I am serious. Life would be so much easier if it was all black and white, true or false, good and bad, would it not? If those who meant well knew everything and those malicious few could not corrupt anything?” The Guardian frowned a bit, frustrated with his words that couldn’t seem to cooperate with him.

“Would it not be lovely if I could talk to you without fighting to keep from turning every honest thought into a question or theoretical statement just to let it be said? That my words could hold a meaning not forcibly disguised in the forms of fables and riddles?” The Guardian looked down lamely, his words tapering off in agitation. For a moment, Virgil waited as the Guardian was silent, contemplative. Then, the next moment the Guardian’s face scrunched up in sadness and his words were soft as he placed a hand over his golden wrist markings.

“My story is complicated, and twisted with shades of grey. One could say what I did was an attempt to keep you safe, another could say that what I did was outlandish and impulsive, and stupid. But no one will be able to tell you that what I did went according to the plan I had... at first. No one will tell you that my intention was to save you, to keep your fate safe. No one will tell you that my plan was ruined. Because there is no longer anyone who remembers what happened that night except for me,”

The Guardian’s eyes flicked up to meet the ravenette’s, a hurt look passing over his face as he continued. His steady voice now just barely trembled with uncertainty as he continued.

“No one but me and the soul who wants so desperately for everyone to forget. The soul who ripped my own in two to bury the secret, and ruin you and I both.”

“My final warning is this: Beware of the man who carries the world on his shoulders unflinchingly, he will be watching you closely. You have immunity to his power thanks to our connection, you might use this knowledge well to find the truth that lies in plain sight. However, your fate lies in the decisions you chose to make with this knowledge, I can only warn you of what might come.” The Guardian nodded solemnly, choosing to finish his cryptic warning there.

Virgil stood there, reeling with the information. Sure, he definitely wasn’t completely convinced he could trust this cryptic stranger, Guardian? Foe? Friend? Virgil wasn’t really sure what to call him anymore. But damn, his life was already so fucking crazy, this was all just fucking crazy! He could just be dreaming for all he knew.

But… Deep inside, he was hoping he wasn’t.

This was, well. This wasn’t what he’d been expecting to hear when facing the man whose, er, body? Had originally tried to strangle him? Now he’d heard his sob story and, well, Virgil wasn’t that easy to fool, but he’d also been told that it wasn’t expected that he’d trust the guy even in the end and he didn’t really want to.

He’d been on the path to death for so long, and then just two days ago everything had changed. So much was happening, it was frankly exhausting. What the fuck was he, some book protagonist? Couldn’t he get a little time to think about all this before he went crazy?

Still, something under all his incredulity begged to hear the guardian out. He vaguely wondered how Stockholm Syndrome worked before he gave in a little. What difference did a little more crazy make in his life at this point?

“Fine, I’ll heed your warning, or whatever the fuck. But only if you can tell me what you mean when you said that this guy ripped your, uh, soul? In two.” Virgil huffed, partially relaxing. It was odd how comforting he found it to be, floating in this weird feeling imaginary world, where he could interact with objects that weren’t real. It felt like he was really standing in his home, and yet it was just built from memory.

The guardian’s solemn expression formed into a grim smile, eyes distant once more before nodding. “I will do the best that my words will allow.” Virgil nodded, and waited for the now very familiar stranger to gather his words and take a breath. Then he began, his markings lightly flashing gold.

“You find yourself whole one day, as you have always been. To be whole of body, whole of mind, both human and guardian in nature. To have conscious thought and control over your whole physical being and soul..

“You find that yourself and others of the winged variety are capable of separating your soul from your being, though only the most Elite can do it well. You find out the family you made would soon be in danger. You then find yourself lost and alone when you once had a home to call your own.

“You find yourself knowing a truth, a perilous truth. Your home is in shambles now that you are gone, yet they do not know it. This truth is at fault, but the blame is not fully your own in a world built on lies.

“The source of truth tucks itself into blankets of grey, drawing itself further from discovery with each passing day. Now only you know the truth. The source of the truth finds you, it seeks to hide you too.

“You find yourself split one day, as you have never been before. Forced apart from the body, trapped within the mind. Guardian in nature, to have conscious thought and your dying soul trapped within, a false mind piloting the puppeteered confines of a broken body with a blind goal.”

“You find you cannot control what you used to, you are a prisoner to a body that is no longer your own, mostly unconscious to the world around it. Crazed by the false emotions that fuel it.”

“The you that used to be is no longer, and has not been for over a hundred years. The world that knew you knows not of what you’ve become. Knows not of the shackles that bind you.

“The you that used to be is no longer, and will never be again.” The Guardian finished, hesitant yellow eyes meeting Virgil’s carefully. Phantom goosebumps trail down Virgil's arms as the final sentence strikes a cord in him.

Virgil found he really wasn’t quite sure how to respond to that, the rawness in the other’s tone spoke volumes of the sore spot they’d reached.

“Your body rests, but your mind also needs time to process today. I shall see you when you next rest, though only if you wish to seek me. Rest well knowing that you will not be scooped from your safety once more, as I hope I’m never to do so again. And...” The guardian paused, considering their next words very carefully.

“I know it is selfish to ask... but, I hope and wish that Thomas is alright, after all this time... Do take care of him, would you?”

Virgil paused and stared, finding only concern and longing in the guardian’s expression. And, well, fuck. What a way to pull at a guy’s heartstrings.

“Er, yes. Yeah. I’ll try my best.” Virgil gave his signature mock salute, the Guardian tipping his hat in return.

“Trying is all I could ever ask of you, Virgil. Rest well, you will need it.” And with that final sentence, the world around Virgil gently grew dark, and he sunk into the comforting arms of sleep.

Despite it all, Virgil still found his mind vaguely conscious. Sluggish at best, but awake nonetheless.

He figured it was likely some lingering effect from the Guardian’s dream realm, but didn’t dwell on it. His life had way too much else going on to be debating the side effects gained from Guardian powers.

First, he’d been pretty damn convinced two days ago that he was going to be a goner by the end of the month. Completely resigned to die believing that his very existence was scorned by the world he’d been unwillingly born into.

Then Patton had stumbled onto his shitty apartment’s roof, found him in all of his resigned and depressed glory, and changed his life forever.

They’d mostly skipped the whole ‘Human nature is a series of life, death, and rebirth’ spiel that guardians were known to give in these situations because... Well, It wasn’t like they’d really had time to address it before the truth about his soul had come out. That he wasn’t exactly human to begin with.

Virgil didn’t think that Guardians had ever had a situation like his before. There wasn’t a protocol for comforting a kidnapped guardian soul. It’d never been a possibility before!

So it wasn’t surprising then, that Virgil didn’t have any better of a time processing it.

His whole life, all that he’d known to be true, all that he’d believed in? Everything had been uprooted and turned on its head. He’d apparently been living a life that was not supposed to be.

Perhaps for the first time in two days, Virgil realized that the thought of his death at the end of the month had not been consistently worming into his brain. It had once been something he could never seem to stop thinking about.

The death indicated by his soul timer was now perhaps the farthest thing from his mind.

Perhaps the strangest thing so far was that he wasn’t alone anymore. He’d possibly had more physical contact with other people in the short two(three?) days since this adventure started then he’d had in the past 16 years.

And wasn’t it just the cherry on top that he’d also gotten nearly choked out by the very guardian accused of kidnapping his soul in the first place? And now he was considering trusting the damn guy.

Virgil hollowly wondered why he even cared.

Why did he care about staying alive now when he’s spent his whole life believing he never would? Up until two days ago, that belief had still been true. But now? Avoiding death was the goal, Logan had stated as much.

Really, would Virgil lose anything by trusting the banished guardian? Even if the guardian was trying to trick Virgil and got him killed, what difference would it make? That’d always been the goal before. What did he, Virgil, really have to lose?

If it happened that Virgil lived past his twentieth birthday, if he became a guardian like he was supposed to be in the first place. Would he want that? Did he want that?

He wasn’t sure. Didn’t know if he ever had been.

His life had been built on resignation to the inevitable. Nothing seemed to motivate him towards liking or hating that possibility. He was just that.

Indifferent.

And wasn’t that just the greatest revelation of the night? Finding out that you’re indifferent to living or dying.

Once this was all over, if Virgil lived that long, he would make a note to see a therapist. He knew very well that this kind of mindset was unhealthy to keep. It just couldn’t be helped that the nineteen years he’d lived with this particular affliction couldn’t be fixed by a few extra hugs and comforting words.

Even if he didn’t like the fact that death sounded like the more peaceful option.

His thoughts paused, mentally sighing at the downward spiral he’d caught himself in. It was tiring, and going nowhere.

‘For now,’ he decided, ‘I’m just going to see how this plays out. The Guardian said that none of the others remember the truth, or whatever. So, It’s a ‘he said-they said’ situation right now...’

‘I’ll have to keep an eye out for the guy that he warned me about, then. Who knows if he's as dangerous as The Guardian made him out to be. It’s hard to tell with the weird way he has to talk..’

Virgil paused again, a realization striking him. If he could have groaned, he would have. Not once had he been given or even remembered to ask for the name of said Guardian. What was he supposed to call the rogue Guardian now? He couldn’t just keep calling him The Guardian!

Amidst the disbelief of such a slip up, a foreign yet familiar feeling prodded questioningly at his conscious mind. Adding confusion into the mix of emotions, he returned the feeling with a questioning thought of his own.

He briefly heard the Guardian’s whispy voice once more, now acting with permission.

“You may call me Janus”

Then all at once, Virgil woke up.

Chapter Nine

#sanders sides #virgil sanders #deceit sanders #lamp/calm #LAMPR/CALMR #LAMP/CALM + remy ‘sleep’ sanders #tw angst #tw long post #long fic #thelostguardianau #morally grey deceit #for the time being #the aim is that he reach sympathetic but trust aint that easy

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thegeminisage · 3 years

Note

for the fic ask meme - 3, 9, 17, 23! <3

ANON MY BELOVED <3 thank you this is so many!!! sorry this took so long to answer!!!! i wound up having a lot to say rip

3: Do you have any upcoming WIPs? How far along are you with them?

i have 3!! there was one thing i was working on prior to nov 5 of last year, which i have only just started considering again. the tag for that is “secret project tag” because well. it is a secret. im not even saying that like “oh im playing i secretly do want to be asked” i dont bc if i told anyone about it i think that i would stop being able to work on it :( like i’m just not sure i’ll finish!!! in the beginning i didn’t even want to say that it was writing, yk? i only even started tagging it because it’s obnoxious to talk about something i can’t talk about & i wanted people to be able to blacklist. i am only about 10k into it, and it will probably wind up being quite long, 150k bare minimum, so it will probably be a very long time before it ever sees the light of day, IF it sees the light of day at all.

second wip is of course the claire-centric envesseled from @cambionverse. cally and i have been struggling with it on and off since 2013 and it is Finally Time. for anyone not familiar with it, cambionverse is a fixit for the end of s6 (initially written during the airing of s6) that centers on claire novak, cas’s vessel’s daughter from s4, ben braeden, dean’s not-kid from s3/s6, and jesse turner, the little half demon from season 5, as young adults. they’re basically ocs at this point and the idea was to do one story for each of them. we did one for jesse and one for ben and claire’s was supposed to be the end of the trilogy, but we got started on a bunch of side projects and had to rewrite almost everything to prep for it, so it’s taken nearly a decade. i am so glad to finally be getting to it!! right now we’ve got about 36k, the first chapter is completely done, the second chapter is in a couple of pieces we’re trying to stitch back together, and the third chapter has like half a scene in it. it’s slow going rn because we’re sort of putting everything from previous drafts back together in coherent pieces, but i think after we get to truly new stuff we haven’t written before (this is our third draft...) it will go a lot faster. i hope so anyway, because we have 7 chapters an an epilogue planned lol. and there’s no guarantee it won’t get bigger! as these things often do.

third & final wip is ofc triptych part 3, the third in the series after to an angel and broken road, currently being called 12:46pm because i don’t have anything better to call it. (12:46pm is when i had the idea for it, or more accurately when @cleaver-2007 GAVE me the idea like the horrible influence they are.) i wrote some about it here! right now i only have about 2500 words for it because i’m struggling with my structure + trying to devote most of my free time to envesseled. i don’t want to give away the big spoiler for its premise but i am really looking forward to it & also terrified because i have seen other people doing it and i think they probably did it/will do it better than me. the way i pick my projects out is “nobody else has done this in a way that satisfies me” or “nobody else has done this at all” because then i don’t feel like im competing with anybody. like NO ONE ELSE wrote a fic where all of camelot, including uther, got magic. i was the sole corner on that market so there was no pressure yk? but this is a fairly popular concept so im angsting hard about pulling it off!!!!!

9: Are there any fics you’d love to see but don’t want to write yourself? What are they?

weirdly enough not too many! most of the time if i REALLY wanna see something and no one else has done it i will simply do it myself, assuming im in a place where i can take on a big project. such as for example a good nuanced john winchester fic. i’m sure there are some but i’m blanking, nothing is coming to mind...i think the only one i can think of right now is really long season/series/episode rewrites, but even then i am reluctant to get too invested in longer works because What If The Author Has Bad Opinions. i bet i will think of a better answer to this question when i am trying to fall asleep tonight

17: What has been the proudest moment for you so far since you started writing?

ok, so it’s a tie. one is of course the huge response to broken road, particularly that bombshell of a 6th chapter...even though i don’t think broken road is my best work, it is by far my most popular one, and i was and still am absolutely humbled by the huge amount of people who followed along week-to-week, who sent in almost literally more comments than i could reply to before it was time to post the next chapter. i know fic popularity is a matter of writing for the right thing at the right time, but it felt like the work resonated with so many people! i can’t even describe with words how that feels.

the second moment is when i finished my first-ever fanfic, which was a novelization of ocarina of time. i started writing it because i wanted to read a novelization but nobody else got to the end...i’d read dozens of deku tree chapters and no ganon’s tower chapters. it wasn’t a great or even very good fanfic, but it was a FINISHED one, and as far as i know i was the first person on FFN (maybe even the only person on FFN) to actually get to the end. when i got done i was like “that is literally the most fun i’ve ever had doing anything and i wanna do it for the rest of my life” and i started a novelization of majora’s mask the very same day. haven’t quit since!

23: What’s one piece of advice you would give to anyone who wants to start writing or posting their writing online?

i actually have a whole list of advice posts but i’m going to cheat and do two again anyway. the first one is, OUTLINE. i swear by the triangle method which posits you need 3 things to do well: enthusiasm about what you’re doing, time to do it, and to know where you’re going next. that last step IS CRUCIAL.

my second piece of advice is to have fun!!! i see posts constantly about how wrting is hard and it sucks and people quit writing all the time because they didn’t get enough comments or whatever, but if i had based my willingness to write on the amount of comments i got i would never have finished my first story, let alone go on to write another (almost) two decades. if you can find even one person to be excited with your shit about, that can be enough. write bc you love to do it - if you don’t, why bother at all?

[fic ask game]

#liz answers asks #anonymous #ask memes #liz loves writing #long post #WAH ty i was so bummed i didnt get any this is so many ilu <3 #cambionverse #12:46pm #undisclosed project tag

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broken-minded-love · 3 years

Text

@sad-sweet-cowboah Hope you don’t mind if I start a new post here, I don’t want to prolong the debate by doing this, but I still have some things to say and the other post is getting kind of ridiculous and is hard to reply to due to it’s length. I’ll quote a few things from the original thread to keep it linked in reply and physically here for posterity. [...I know it makes me seem suspicious but I have a habit of reading things without saving them, etc...] I appreciate that you wouldn’t keep track like that, who does? However, I can’t see any credit given to HOGO or her work on your blog/story before the original call out drama in 2019? Obviously you may have done that privately, but I know how fandoms work and there’s a lot of mutual backscratching in drama’s like this so it seems impossible to truly validate any of this independently, which is a shame. Perhaps it was my mistake, but when you said you’d been inspired by HOGO’s fics I assumed she’d written a full fic. I can’t find an actual chaptered fan fic following videogame Arthur in modern times from HOGO, and nothing of him in that setting by himself. It all seems to be involving the gang too, which is quite a different dynamic to what occurs in your series and Wish Upon. I can see how it would be difficult to keep track of HOGO’s posts, even if you were trying too, because I can see dozens of drabbles, but nothing as a titled fic you could keep track of. I can also see why those little scenes and dialogs may have inspired you, but as I said I can’t see any credit for the inspiration as you claimed? Besides which, it’s all kind of a moot point, because I think the bigger issue seems to be less about the initial inspiration and more about the timing and direct comparisons that can be drawn between your series and Wish Upon. [...I also included the-awkward-outlaw’s series as an example since you mentioned previously that it’s a “very niche” topic when it’s more popular than one would think. ...] Well, yes, it is now, but it wasn’t to begin with. Ever since the onset of this drama, I’ve only seen a tiny handful of attempts at covering Arthur in the modern world in a fic, which still makes it niche when you compare to the volume of repeated themes in Red Dead fics over all. It was a completely non existent plotline (at least on AO3/FFNET) in October ‘18 through Jan ‘19, and the game had been out for three months already when @miss-oscurita published Wish Upon. Yet no one had stepped up to bring us a story covering the concept of video game Arthur alive in 2018/9. The reason Wish Upon hooked me personally, was because it was completely different to the numerous “damsel in distress”, “highborn babe”, “tough outlaw chick” that were a dime a dozen. There was also several “modern reader goes back in time” stories too, but Wish Upon was the first incarnation of Arthur coming out of the game into the modern world, in an actual fic at least. No doubt the idea could have been circulating, but no one had actually taken the time to put it into an actual story to my knowledge. Does that mean Oscurita should hold a monopoly on the idea? Of course not, but it does explain why anything that followed Wish Upon’s publication, including TOA’s recent works, will be bound to draw comparisons simply because Wish Upon was first on the scene to cover the topic, and as a result is likely the most well known version of it. I think the real issue here isn’t who all’s covered Arthur living in modern times, it’s more the issue over the dynamic where the protag is familiar with him as a character, because the dynamic of the pairing and the story itself changes so much when it’s explored from that angle. The dynamic is also affected when the fic focuses only on the two main characters (as with the gang being in the modern world in HOGO’s concepts) especially when they are both aware he’s fictional that it’s really something that can only be done once, maybe twice at a push. And yes you’d have to be certifiable to believe ideas won’t overlap, I mean it’s going to be a really hollow story if you don’t cover things like Arthur using a microwave, or using a toothbrush and showering for the first time, or learning to drive, discovering movies and what not. However, from what I seen over the course of this matter, it seems the issue with it all lies in how and when these elements are explored in the story. I may be wrong, but I don’t think there’s ever been an issue raised with any other parts of your series beyond that of As We Meet, has there? And the issues raised over the original instalment and the rewritten piece seemed to be because it essentially follows the exact pattern of Wish Upon’s first few chapters, as we’ve already discussed.

[... I’m 99% positive the catalyst was a h-o-g-o oneshot of Arthur discovering lingerie...]

Funny that you should mention discovering lingerie when @miss-oscurita’s most recent update included Arthur discovering modern underwear for the first time. I don’t recall in which of your stories he did that?

Just in the interest of being informed, I searched HOGO’s blog and found a chapter mentioning lingerie (which I assume is the one that inspired you?) but that in itself is a classic example of how the same idea can be done by two different people and still be complete different.

Which I’m sorry to say really only further highlights why the similarities in your opening chapters are such a cause for concern.

Regardless of the inspiration, if we list the similarities we have from the original piece, and the rewrite the issues are pretty clear.

1) Young female gamer protag.

2) Modern day setting.

3) Both have adopted silver tabby cats.

4) Both have the backdrop of being alone on a stormy night.

5) Both involved with an event that brings Arthur out of the game.

6) Both aware of him as a fictional character before being a flesh and blood man.

4) Both immediately assume him to be an intruder.

5) Both think they are dreaming and pinch themselves.

6) Both use touch as a way to confirm he’s there in the flesh.

7) Both fics use the same name for animals.

8) Both fics almost immediately go on to explore Arthur showering, discovering cellphones, watching TV/movies, using a microwave, in almost the exact same order. 9) Both use some variation of the “my Arthur” device.

Then in the rewrite you make changes to also include:

10) Both use his horse to confirm he’s ripped straight from the game.

11) Both use extremely similar types of names for the horses.

12) Both work from home, for one reason or another. Seeing it written out like that I can more understand why people have red flagged it, as it goes a bit beyond simply exploring the same concept as the likes of HOGO/TAO may be doing. I mean it was bound to flare things up to include additional similar elements. What I don’t get is, knowing how toxic the fandom is, and that you’re under the microscope over this, why you didn’t take the rewrite as an opportunity to distance yourself from those similarities? And if I’m brutally frank with you here, it does come across as a bit of “drama farming” when you know the consequences of similarities all too well. And what I still don’t get is how you’ve not managed to move away from these controversies? I’m a lot of a loser, and have kept an eye on this drama since it began and I have to say when you interjected with the other drama around Wish Upon late last year, that came across to me as looking for drama, or at least being lead to it by someone else somewhere. I don’t know where you got the tip off for that, because the post wasn’t tagged and I only saw it due to following @miss-oscurita/you on my fandom account and the other writer in question was very new to the RDR fandom and likely didn’t have much of a following. Add that to the poor wording on the announcements of your rewrites and you know, I’m sure it’s innocent on your part, but I can see why it doesn’t look good to others. I mean I could easily believe you were trying to avoid making the stories similar and accidentally included the horse thing simply because your ideas and the ideas from Wish Upon merged, because unless you’re able to keep them firmly separate in your head it’s going to happen now you know of Wish Upon. If it was me, I’d be doing my best to not give anyone any more reason to throw shit at my house. Instead you’ve somehow managed to do the opposite. The rewrite was a missed opportunity to draw a line under all the past drama, and that’s disappointing to see as a reader and a writer too. I do hope you manage to sort this all out, and that there’s no further public bashing over it all but now the seal is broken on it all it’ll be very hard to prevent the sharks smelling the tiniest drop of blood in the water.

#writing #fan fic dramas #not going to tag this for fandom to avoid inflaming the situation further #sad-sweet-cowboah #miss-oscurita

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littlemessyjessi · 3 years

Text

Torn: Remus Lupin Story: PS OC:Chapter Four: Ninja

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Remus Lupin Imagine Turned Story

Re-Written and Edit of an old story of mine I had on Mibba that deserved some more love and attention, lol.

Remus Lupin x Vega Black (OC, OFC, PLUS SIZE OC, PLUS SIZE OFC)

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"Blame it or praise it, there is no denying the wild horse in us."

- Virginia Woolf

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Song that inspired the vibe, lol. I literally listening to this while writing it.

“Get Off of My Back”- Bryan Adams

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It had been three weeks since the incident and Vega was once again in the hospital wing. Not for injuries this time but instead helping Madame Pompfrey. During her brief stay, she found many things about the Healer that interested her. When a seventh year Quidditch scrimmage went wrong and poor Jeanette McDonald was carried in almost unconscious...she jumped into action clearing a bed and getting Madame Pompfrey's kit. Vega, it would seem, was a rather natural at this kind of thing. She assessed the situation, analyzed the details and sought out the proper ingredients...all while jumping into action very quickly and keeping a cool head. For a first year, it was rather impressive and Madame Pompfrey had offered her a spot on the Early Healers program. It was rather odd for a first year to do this but she seemed to have natural talent. After her discussing her outstanding work in Potions with Professor Slughorn along with her impressive talents in Charms and Transfiguration according to the other Professors....Madame Pompfrey felt it a true waste to not at least entertain the idea. Vega had jumped at the offer. It was all very exciting to her and though it was stressful...it was extremely rewarding. She felt a sort of passion for it as she worked as assistant to the school's resident Healer. However, at that moment in time...something sour had settled in her stomach because Remus Lupin was laying in the hospital bed looking extremely worse for wear. Madame Pompfrey had initially told her that she would deal with it alone but upon seeing his wounds...she called for the quiet girl. "Pat the wounds." she said quietly, as to not waking the sleeping boy. Vega steadied her hand as she cleaned the blood from her friend's chest. "What goes on here is secret." Madame Pomfrey told her. "What you see and come to know stays here. Do you understand?" The young Black nodded. "They are not our secrets to tell, Miss Black." she said and Vega simply nodded. She didn't know what had happened to Remus but she had an inkling of a thought. She desperately hoped she was wrong but she was far too smart and read far to many books to believe that. She had her suspicions, of course. She was very observant and had noticed little ticks of his that tipped her off. But she just...she didn't want to believe it. But after this. The full moon, the horrible sounds last night and now here he was looking almost ripped to shreds....she'd be stupid if she denied it. Remus Lupin...was a werewolf. She finished him up with Madame Pompfrey before helping the woman with the necessary potions. The Healer told her she was finished for the night and to go and get some supper at the Great Hall. She was tired but a violent rumble from her stomach told her that bed was not an option at the moment. She was almost there when she heard a familiar laugh behind her. "Well, if it isn't the itty bitty baby Black." Vega bit her tongue. Bellatrix.

She really wasn’t in the mood for Bella and her childish antics.

Not today.

Not after the week she’d had.

Not after she’d spent so much time with her own hands drench in Remus’ blood.

Not after she’d spent so much time in her head worried about him. "I believe Regulus is less cowardly than you are...and he's not even in school yet." she teased. Vega turned to stare at her cousin.

“Go away Bella.” she said. “I’m not in the mood.”

“Oooh, grown a bit of backbone have you?” Bella sneered. “Good, it’ll be all the more fun to break.”

“Get off my of my back, Bellatrix!” Vega snapped as her anger bubbled. Bellatrix was flanked by her Lucius Malfoy and Rodolphous Lestrange. "What the matter?" she taunted. "Scared? Maybe we should sing a song for the baby? What was it that the blood traitor used to sing? Oh, yes! Row, row, row your boat...gently down the stream...scarily, scarily, scarily, scarily, life is but a SCREAM!" Vega’s stomach churned as Bella turned the innocent song her father used to sing to her into something sour and dark. Her cousin cackled manically. "She's scared boys!" she erupted. "Look, she's shaking!" But Vega was not scared. She was angry. She was shaking because she was trying to keep from drawing her wand. Bella smirked, "Get her, boys." Vega braced herself for a moment before something washed over her...and she changed.

She was done.

So done. Rodolphus was first and when he came at her she pulled her foot back and landed a hard kick to his chest before using the force to spin around and kick Lucius in the nose....effectively breaking it. Bella snarled at this unexpected rebellion and drew her wand. However, Vega was quicker and bellowed, "Expelliarmus!" Bella's wand flew into her hand and she gasped. Vega arched a dark brow at her cousin and said, "One more move and I snap it in half." Bella almost growled but there was still clear shock on her features at this unbridled attack. "I'll get you for this you little blood traitor! We're cousins!" Bella snapped. "Yes, we are and you've done nothing but torment me since the day you met me. I've had enough. The next time, I won't be as lenient, Bella. The next time...it'll hurt." Vega told her very seriously. "Now get out of my face.” Lucius and Roldophus skittered up to their feet, the blond leaning on the other for support as his nose bled profusely. "My wand." Bella pressed. "I'll give it to Andromeda. She can decide if you get it back." Vega told her, staring her down with stormy grey eyes. "You little-!" "Or would you prefer I take it to Slughorn...or perhaps Dumbledore?" she challenged and Bella bit her tongue before sneering and heading off after her friends. Vega watched them go and let out a deep breath only to tense up when something grabbed her. Only...she couldn't see what it was. Something had her....that she could tell...and it felt soft. She hesitantly reached out and grabbed it. It crumbled in her hand and she pulled it off to reveal a disheveled, well more so than usual, James Potter. "James!" she gasped. "What the?" "Vega, that was brilliant!" he exclaimed as he hoisted the little girl up and twirled her around in the air. "Sirius, will be so proud!" "Don't tell him!" she rushed out with panic in her eyes. "Tell me what?" She looked past James' horribly messy dark hair to see her cousin looking at her with an odd look on his face. He looked between her and James' rather compromising position with an arched brow that mirrored Vega’s own almost identically. It seemed to dawn on them and they backed away from each other. "So?" he pressed, curiosity clear in his grey eyes. "What wasn't I supposed to know?" Both were silent. James was dying to tell his friend...but he hated to betray Vega like that if she really, truly didn't want him to know. "James." Sirius pressed, looking his friend in the eye. Well, he tried to. If James hadn't been avoiding eye contact like the plague. Sirius glanced at Vega again before his eyes drifted down to her hand. A grin overtook his features. "Is that Bella's wand?" Vega sighed sensing the inevitable.

"Yes!" James exploded. "It was amazing, Sirius! She was incredible! Like some kind of ninja! She broke Malfoy's NOSE! And she disarmed Bella and send them on their way, sassed them into oblivion!" Sirius grinned but then his eyes narrowed, "And how do you know this?" James shrugged and held up his Invisibility Cloak. "And you were just doing to watch?" Sirius pressed, irritation growing at the prospect of James standing by and letting Vega get hurt.

Again. "Well, I was gonna step in if she needed help but Andromeda did say to let her fight her own battles....and she was great!" he said before looking at Vega. "It was really impressive." Her cheeks flushed red. "I'll see you later." she told them. "I'm starving and if I don't eat something soon, I might attack someone." James dramatically cleared the way, "By all means, Great Ninja of Ravenclaw. Lead us to the bountiful mountains of food. I, Sir James Potter of Gryffindor, shall accompany you into the journey of badassedness in exchange for lessons on your mad skills." Vega and Sirius cracked up at that and the three of them headed off to the Great Hall for something to eat. She headed for Ravenclaw but instead Sirius pulled her over to sit with them. "Sirius." she pressed. "I'm not in your house." "It's fine." he rolled his eyes. "Besides...I want to hear how you smashed stupid Malfoy's nose to smithereens." She scowled at him making him smirk. "You tell me or I'll have James tell it...and the more he repeats things...the wilder they get." he warned her as the very boy in question was currently retelling the story to an older Gryffindor...this time saying that Rowan was a jujitsu master.

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Chapter Three

Chapter Five

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Hello my lovelies!

Woooo child! We got some friction! How do we feel about Vega fiesty retaliation? I’d love to hear from you!

Here is another rewrite of a previous work of mine that I had on Mibba! I did a bit of reworking on the character, her name and her backstory because I just felt like she deserved more! I would love to know what you think of little Vega!

So please comment, reblog with thoughts and/or smash the ask box! I do so love hearing from you my loves!

Love,

Kenny

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@frankie2902

@pleasantdreamqueen @becrazy–beyou

@littledeadrottinghood @blackirisposts

@therealmrshale @woodworthti666@thegreatirene@fanfictionandjunk

@angelus320

@alanlizzingtonshore@buriednurbckyrd@disneymarina@tubbypeachwriting

@sullybot @georgiagrl1990 @whenallsaidanddone

@mischiefnevermanaged94 @inumorph

@congurl

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@qtmeryr

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@thickemadame @babygirl-barnes

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Love, Kenny

#remus lupin #remus john lupin #remus lupin x vega black #remus x vega #marauder #marauder era #marauder era remus lupin #young remus lupin #sirius black cousin #sirius black sister #vega equuleus black

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to-be-small · 4 years

Text

Chapter One

Part Two Part Three

It was a miserable wet night when I reached the tavern. The moon was a silver faintly glowing behind light clouds. The rain was just letting up, that hadn’t helped with the fact I had been walking through hours of downpour just to reach this town.

By wrist ached its pain slowly crawling up the rest of my arm, and my stomach felt ready to lose itself any second if I didn’t get something to eat. If I wanted to eat I’d have to earn it, my pockets were as empty as a temple during a bacchanal.

I kissed my fingertips and raised them to the sky before pushing the door open to the tavern.

It was a decent tavern, if not on the smaller side. The furniture was well made and clean, worn but still presentable. It smelled like beer and unwashed bodies but that was to be expected. It wasn’t like we were in the cities where people bathed daily. Patrons scattered across tables all farmers and work men. I grimaced slightly, not the type to appreciate fine art much less loosen their purse strings for it.

I could be wrong of course. I could always be wrong.

Not that it happened much.

I made a beeline for the bar and to the man behind it. He was the best dressed in the room, under a stained apron he wore fitted clothes of muted purple and reds. Money to spare it seemed. I gave my most winning smile, pushing my hair out of my face. “Hello kind sir, I was wondering if you would allow me to let me perform in your most fine establishment?”

He gave me a once over. Noting my soaked dirt stained, ripped and soaked clothes and my bandaged wrist. “You won’t get any coin from me bard, but it’s no skin off my nose if you do.”

“Understandable, thank you.” My smiled was much more strained than before. When I was turned around I couldn’t help my shoulders falling slightly. I chose the emptiest corner of the room.

I unfurled my shawl from my hair stuffing it in my bag. I hummed slightly, realizing I wasn’t going to have time to properly warm up my voice.

It was going to be fine. I was sure.

My first song was a quick ditty about the Gods. It was the story of how the Nine divided the earth. It got a few glances my way but that was it. I moved onto a more bawdy song about a farmer's daughter which was a poor choice I got more glances some guffaws but mostly scathing looks. My voice was strained and it keep cracking. I only had one more song in me before I hurt my voice too badly.

I looked over the patrons some of the snoring into their drinks. I caught a trio pointing and snickering at me.

If that was the way the wanted things. I pulled off my bag and left it on the floor.

I started to stomp rhythmically, chanting an old prayer and heads started to turn.

I paid them no attention as I started to move my footsteps rattling drinks on tables.

I began to sing. “Eyes of gold, hands of hair and meat, the giants who wait for your sleep,

“The love the smell of blood, they wish to stomp you into the mud,

“The men who live in the mountain,”

“Hide your wives, hide your daughters,”

“They come, they come, the men of the mountain”

As I moved across the tavern for a few moments I remembered why I chose to live my life like this. Eyes watched me, memorized by me, by my song. They forgot drinks and worries and focused only on me. The song is more about proper rhythm and enunciated than it is about vocal power.

When I was done, I was happy with my work. Sure that they would show their appreciation. Two men gave a copper each and the rest turned back to what they were doing.

I hated small towns.

Defeated I slinked back to the bar and put my two coppers down. “How much is will this get me?”

The bar keep looked down at me before slinging a towel over his shoulder. “How much do you want?”

“A warm drink and dinner?” And spiced wine and a bath and a bed and dry clothes.

“One or the other”

I stifled a groan and pushed the two coins toward him. “Give me the dinner,” purposely leaving off the please. He scooped them up and put them into a pocket, he turned toward the back.

Two more copper coins fell on the counter. “I’ll pay for the drink” a new voice said.

The bar keep looked to me and shrugged turning away before I could say anything. “One dinner and warm drink coming up.”

I turned toward the man who paid for my drink. The first thing that hit me was his height. He towered above me, and it was a wonder why his head didn’t brush against the ceiling. He was built solidly, like an oak. Dark brown hair that pulled up and away from his face.

“Thank you,” I started unsure of what to say next.

He pulled at the chair next to me and sat down. “You’re welcome friend.” My eye brows rose at his forwardness. “You shouldn’t blame them too much you know.”

“Pardon?”

He jerked his head to the rest of the tavern. “Its been a bad winter, money’s tight.”

I huffed. “If money is tight then they shouldn’t be drinking, they should be saving their coins.”

He grinned and I noticed his green eyes for the first time. They looked as if they were built up of hundreds of tiny dots all different shades of green. It was like there was a forest in his eyes. “You can’t blame a man for wanting a bit of comfort in dark times. You always sing, or do you do anything else?”

“Of course I do” I snapped. “I was trained to sing and to play the lute.” I held up my hand and the other man’s smile faded. “I wouldn’t be just singing if I had another option.”

“What happened to your hand?” He asked eyes still on the purple and brown bruises, still slightly swollen.

“A man thought my services included late nights. I got it for my trouble.” The barkeep came back dropping a meat pie and a mug of what smelled like spiced cider. Both me and the man nodded to him.

I picked up the pie with my good hand and took a bite. It was cold and fatty and to my stomach the best thing I had in a month.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to insult you or pry. I liked your singing but I can tell that its been awhile since you’ve had time to practice at it.” It was warm apologize and a glance to his face told me he was sincere. “My name’s Pyotr.” He held out his hand.

I brushed off my hand and shook it. “Bria.”

His smile returned. “That’s quite a lovely name, got any good stories for me Bria?”

His smile was so wide and earnest, I hadn’t seen one like in almost a year. It melted my cold heart too quickly. “Only if you have a few yourself.”

I told myself it was worth it to have a reason to stay in the warm dry tavern. That was the only reason.

We talked for hours. Pyotr was quick to laugh and it made him a good listener. He was quick witted as well, and I didn’t have to water down any of my stories like I normally did. He had good stories as well, mostly stories about him and brother. One story of how they tried to steal a cow, had me howling. I begged him if I could rewrite as a song and he said he’d be honored.

He also paid for drinks which made all of the stories much more funny. When I was into my cups and I couldn’t help myself. I hummed softly under my breath as he told another story, and watched the colors around him change.

He was outlined in purple. And if I wasn’t drunk I would have been more interested in that.

With magic I see colors that surrounded a person. Most ranged in earth and jewel tones. They told me if the person was touched by magic in any way and what type. Most had none or slight earth colors showing something but nothing they could call on. The more intense and thick the colors the more intense the magic ability. Earth tones meant simple magic, little spells things for witches and mages. But jewel tones, like myself meant different more unique talents tied to a skill. Singing was mine, but for another it could be painting or farming.

I had never seen purple before, not once in my entire life. But I couldn’t say anything. Magic was forbidden unless you were under the service of a noble. I couldn’t risk outing myself and him. So I brushed it off.

By the time we were done it was just before dusk. I picked myself off my chair and thanked him for the wine and the company.

“Where are you going?” He asked as I started to stumbled off.

“I’m going to go sleep all this off somewhere.” I said, slightly swaying as I stood.

“Ah, I see, stay safe friend.” I waved to him before turning toward the door.

“Hope to see you soon again friend.” I said. He said something but I was too far away to hear it clearly.

The moon was gone, and sunset was soon. What I needed was somewhere to sleep. I cursed as I stumbled through the underbrush my night vision failing me.

I stumbled around for maybe half an hour before I found a clearing.

A loud yawn escaped me as I stretched out my arms. I started to pull out my sleeping kit, when a rush of birds flew above and away from me. I turned towards them spooked myself, just in time to see something rushing toward me.

I raised my hands, stumbling back. Something pushed my legs out from under me and I fell backwards arms failing.

Something encased me and my vision went dark. I was still on my back my hands still failing hit something warm, something pulsing with life. My chest grew heavy as I looked my my sight returning.

I realized what I was staring up at was two giants hands encasing me.

My entire body went limp my head slamming into the warm flesh. Quicker than I would like to admit, I passed out falling into a safe dark place.

#g/t #G/t story #g/t fiction #gt #Giant/tiny #fantasy giant #g/t fantasy story #I know I was supposed to have Part four of the Princess and the Giant out by now but I got the idea for this and had to write it #I don't have a title for this yet but soon I hope #Lets see the reactions to this and then see how it goes

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demisexualemmaswan · 4 years

Text

the story can resume (2/???)

A/N: "I'll definitely update in October," I said to myself two months ago. I tried to write but I admittedly struggled a little bit with writing this chapter. Hoping you'll enjoy this chapter! Also, I thought Henry was going to bet he sole narrator and then the muse decided otherwise. Hoping you’ll enjoy Emma and Killian’s perspective too!

Summary: “The story can resume. … I will return. Find you, love you, marry you and live without shame.”An unfortunate misunderstanding caused by secrets and naivety forces a young couple to be torn from each other far too soon. It’s up to Henry Nolan to put the clues together and right the wrong he has caused his sister and the man she loves most.Inspired by the book/film Atonement for the Captain Swan Movie Marathon. Tagging: @kmomof4 @hollyethecurious @teamhook @jarienn972 @dreameronarooftop15 @captain-emmajones @klynn-stormz @snowbellewells @csalltheway @captainswanmoviemarathon @captainswan21 @xsajx @lonelyspectator12 @yasbio2015 @mariakov81 @xarandomdreamx

[Read on Ao3]

“And he burnt the manuscript?” Killian asked angrily, digging another hole in the ground for the new shrubbery.

“He tried to,” Emma sighed from where she was lounging on the grass. “Apparently it was rescued from the fire with only a singed back cover and enough emotional scars to almost keep Henry from writing ever again.” She closed her eyes, tilting her face toward the sun. “Was it a mistake for me to leave, Killian?”

Her voice trembled and it stopped him in his tracks.

“I...I can handle it when father gets like that. It’s been this way for ages, and he’s never understood Henry. I should’ve stayed here to protect him.” She slung her arm over her face to stop him from seeing her tears. He could tell by the way her chest hitched a little bit. “At the very least, by now they would’ve married me off and I could do something they’d actually be proud of.”

“Emma,” Killian murmured, putting the shovel down. He furtively glanced around to make sure no one was watching him before he sat beside her. “Emma, love. You would’ve hated being stuck here. As awful as those gits were to you, I know how much you relished using your mind the last four years. You’re brilliant in so many other ways that your father is an arsehole for being unable to appreciate. There’s no point in sacrificing your happiness for everyone else’s. You deserve to be just as happy as any of them.”

He reached out to touch her and then thought better of himself.

Killian glanced around again to make sure that Emma was the only one who had heard him. If he was to be honest, he had gotten quite used to the freedom that had come with being at Oxford. No one scrutinized their every movement, he could speak his mind to Emma, and she could speak hers in turn. If anything, their time away from the manor had solidified their ironclad friendship. When they were taking the train home, Emma curled into his side as she slept, the nightfall cloaking everything that they had wanted to hide from each other, everything they’d wanted to ignore. But daylight had thrown everything into a sharp relief.

Their stations, and Emma’s family, would never accept him as being more than the servant boy that they found on the street. Which would’ve been perfectly fine, if Killian had not been ardently and devotedly in love with Emma. He had no idea if she returned his feelings, but he fancied himself the keeper and protector of her heart.

(He had other feelings toward Emma that he would only act upon when he was alone, as he pictured the hollow of her throat, her hair tossed back and what she would feel like around him.)

He would just have to simply resume the task in secret. If anything, it made him feel like her knight, championing himself for her, promising himself in all things to keep her heart safe. He was quite sure Emma would break his nose again if he ever verbalized his feelings, either sort of his feelings. She was a tough lass and she certainly didn’t need to be rescued. An incident in a bar at Oxford involving one Neal Cassidy and a broken foot certainly proved that to all and sundry that Emma Nolan was not to be trifled with.

But Killian did not mind building his best friend back up when she felt knocked down. She was fierce and brilliant, but it did not change that she needed to be reminded of this when the world knocked just a little too harshly.

“I’m supposed to be picking flowers,” Emma muttered, finally drawing her arm away from her face. Her eyes were dry, if a little red. “David’s coming home today. For a visit. Did you know?”

“Aye, I’d heard,” Killian murmured. “A very reliable author informed me.” Warmth and amusement flooded his tone and Emma chuckled softly in spite of herself. “He’s bringing the fiancee. Mary something.”

“Mary Margaret. And two friends: Walsh Ozman and Graham Hubert,” Emma sighed, her green eyes flickering up to him. In the sunlight, he could see the golden flecks that were found in both Henry and David’s eyes, but they made her eyes look all the more striking. “Apparently they’re both extremely eligible bachelors.” Her voice hardened and her eyes narrowed.

“Well, you can always break their noses and send them running,” Killian said serenely, standing up and getting ready to return to the yard work.

Emma rolled onto her side and looked up at him, a smile playing on the corners of her lips. “It didn’t scare you away,” she reminded him softly.

“And it never will,” he promised, heading over to the wheelbarrow and shovel again.

Emma’s hand reached for him as if to call him back and then she seemed to think better of herself, her fingers neatly folding in on themselves. “Thank you,” she murmured softly. “I don’t know what I’d do without you, Killian.” She came up beside him for a moment and rested her chin on his shoulder, her arms ensnaring his waist.

He tilted his head slightly so he could look at her over his shoulder. “You’ll never have to find out,” he promised softly, his lips so close to hers that it wouldn’t be out of the realm of possibility to just turn around and kiss her.

For a moment they shared a breath, simply looking at each other. His eyes searched hers, desperate for some sign that he could do what he’d wanted to do for the last four years. Her gaze never broke from his, and he could’ve lost himself in the green of her eyes forever. She leaned in a little closer until a yell from the house distracted them both.

Emma pulled away abruptly, her breath rattled. Though he had not kissed her, he felt like his lips were buzzing with the anticipation of the act. “I need to go get the flowers,” she rasped, immediately turning on her heel and all but fleeing back into the house.

“Emma!” Killian called after her, racing to try and grab her hand, to get her to explain, to get her to tell him what the hell that just was.

But the honking down the lane signified the return of Liam with the car and the arrival of David and their guests.

And then one car became two, signaling the arrival of Emma’s cousins and Killian sighed. It was going to be a very long day.

“But I don’t want to act out your stupid old story!” Jack protested, folding his arms over his chest. “This is horrifically boring! Hardly any violence in it at all!” “I agree, I want there to be some action! I think it’d be rather exciting for Leon to be stabbed at the end and I am an excellent stabber!” Nick added excitedly.

“And I am very excellent at falling over and pretending to be dead!” Jack exclaimed. He leapt to his feet and Nick pretended to stab him. Jack held onto his chest and staggered before falling over, pretending to be dead. “See, Henry?” the boy asked, his voice muffled by the floor.

“No one is getting stabbed!” Henry protested hotly, crossing his arms. If he had known that casting his cousins in the reading of the story was going to be such an arduous task, he wouldn’t have done it at all. They were every bit as opinionated and bossy as they ever were, and any sympathy Henry had for their plight was long gone in the wake of their atrocious behavior. “If you want a part with stabbing then you can write your own story.”

“Let’s go swimming!” Jack cried, springing up from the ground. “It’s too hot and I don’t want to write or read any sort of story! It’s summer and I shan’t do any school work while I’m here!”

“It’s not school work,” Henry short back.

“No school! No school!” Nicholas chanted.

“Let’s go for a swim!” Jack cried.

“But then we won’t be prepared for--” Henry started, but the uproar of the twins drowned out his protest as the two bolted out of the rooms, racing to see which one could find their swimsuit the fastest and which one could do the biggest cannonball off the docks.

“Just a half an hour break, Henry.” His cousin, Ava, had only sat back during the whole exchange with a little smirk on her face. Even when she spoke, there was still a condescending edge to her tone that had Henry crossing his arms. “I’m sure you can manage that for your guests, can’t you? It’s what Uncle Leopold would want.”

Henry’s shoulders slumped. “Yeah, go take your swim,” he muttered, looking at the floor. “I’ll just be up here waiting when you guys get back.”

“Will you rewrite Arabella’s last scene so that she faints?” Ava asked, tapping her cheek. “I’m a wonderful fainter. My drama teacher at school says so.” Henry just nodded mutely. “Good boy,” she said snidely before flouncing out of the room.

WIth a sigh, Henry sat back down at his desk, pressing his forehead to the wood. There was a moment where he briefly considered tearing up the whole thing and letting his cousins off the hook. But he was sure that it would come back to haunt him someway.

No doubt Ava would complain that Henry wasn’t being courteous to the guests and had destroyed the book because it wasn’t going his way. And then Henry would get a long lecture which certainly would feature the phrase “man up” several times over.

Besides, as much as he wanted to, he was sure ripping up his manuscript would only prove his father right and greatly disappoint Emma. He was more afraid of the latter in that regard that the former and so he set it aside.

Still, there was nothing that said he couldn’t write a revenge story about his cousins very quickly. That he could shred up so that it would never see the light of day, and it would make him feel more amiable toward his cousins upon their return from their swim.

After quickly adding in a line at the end to indicate that Arabella would faint, Henry began work on his project to let out his frustrations. In this story, he was much braver, all but shouting at his cousins. In this story, his voice roared like a lion when he took back his manuscript from his father and his father kowtowed to his interests. And maybe in this story, he was just a little bit better at math. There was nothing quite like getting lost in a story, as the world around him seemed to fade away. His bedroom no longer seemed to exist, but instead a world of evil queens, werewolves and monsters. He was quite entranced in his plot when a shout drew him away from his writing. Going to the window, he saw Emma and Killian standing by the fountain. Their father’s favorite vase was beside Emma, full of flowers. Henry was too far away to hear exactly what they were saying but he could hear Killian’s voice shouting at Emma. His sister stood stock still before she brusquely began shimmying out of her dress leaving her only in her chemise. Henry ducked away from the window, his heart pounding against his chest. What had he just seen?

Had Killian told her to do that?

Emma, after leaving Killian in the garden, had walked back into the house to get the vase. Her cheeks burned with how close she and Killian had been, though she tried to convince herself that it was just because it was hot outside.

She only had a moment’s notice to pull herself together as the twins came barrelling down the hall.

“I can jump farther than you!” “Well I can swim faster than you!” “Goodness, what’s all this about?” Emma laughed, watching Jack and Nicholas chase each other around the table.

“Can we go for a swim, Emma, please?” they pleaded in unison, still chasing each other in a circle.

“Yes, of course you can go for a swim!” Emma laughed. “Go on! Race to see who can get there faster!” The boys giggled and went tumbling out of the house, shoving each other as they went. She smiled fondly for a moment before she went back to find the vase.

She picked her father’s favorite vase, knowing that he would want to show it off proudly on the table, and at least if she’d picked the right vase it would be a small recompense for whatever damage she was liable to do later on in the evening.

Closing her eyes and counting to three, she took in a few deep breaths still trying to will the heat in her cheeks away.

“Why are you so flushed, cousin?” Ava asked suspiciously from the door.

Emma’s eyes flew open. “Because it’s the hottest it’s been all summer,” she replied. “And I’ve just been in the garden.”

“With Killian, I’m sure.” Her cousin responded, then took a considerable pause before adding, “I’m sure your father would be very interested in hearing about that.”

Emma did not appreciate the tone that her cousin was taking. She stepped closer to Ava, just to remind the other girl she was a little taller and a little older.

“A reminder to you that this is my house, and I am to go where I please,” Emma replied firmly. “And if Killian happens to be working while I’m lounging in the garden, then there’s nothing wrong with that. If anything, I’m sure my father would love to hear how committed Killian is to the upkeep of the estate.”

She brushed past Ava before turning around and adding, “It would do you well, cousin, to be more gracious to your hosts. You may be a guest, but don’t think I don’t know about the money that’s gone into keeping your family’s indiscretions quiet.”

“Are you threatening me?” Ava demanded.

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” Emma replied with a thin smile. “I’m just reminding you that you could certainly practice a little more gratitude. After all, your reputation hangs quite precariously and if you fall out of my father’s favor, then you might actually have to work for a living, cousin.” She tilted her head and added, “Perhaps Killian might be able to teach you about gardening. He’s quite good at it.”

She began to walk away, but Ava was determined to have the last word. “At least I’m not a good-for-nothing like you!” Ava shot back, folding her arms over her chest with a pout.

She stopped in her tracks, turning around to face her cousin. The remark didn’t sting coming from her cousin. She heard it so often that the remark barely made a mark coming from anyone. “Was that meant to insult me?” Emma laughed, the sound high and bitter. “You’ll have to do better than that. I already know I’m a good-for-nothing.”

With that, she walked back out into the garden. Killian straightened up when he saw her, but didn’t dare approach. He went back to his work, watching her out of the corner of his eye. Emma picked flowers while she waited for Ava to stalk past them and follow her brothers. True to form, Ava flounced past them with her nose in the air.

“It’s an excellent bouquet you’ve picked, love,” was the first thing Killian said to her, after a few moments of heavy silence.

“Yes, I think David will like them a lot,” Emma said, trying to keep her voice bright. “I just need to grab some water from the fountain.”

“Well, that works out for me. Your mother wishes me to water the rose bushes by the fountain. I’ll come with you.”

Emma and Killian walked side by side to the fountain, the only sound passing between them the rattling of the wheelbarrow at first.

“You’re not a good-for-nothing,” he said quietly to her. “You have to know you’re…”

“I am, Killian,” Emma said quietly. “But you’re sweet for saying I’m not.” Her sigh was heavy. “Knowing me, somehow I’ll have picked the wrong flowers or the wrong vase too.”

“Well, let me water them for you,” Killian offered gallantly when they arrived at the fountain. “So that you can say you didn’t mess up the watering.” He wrapped his fingers around the handle of the vase.

“No, I’ve got it.” She tugged the vase closer to her.

“I insist, love.” He tugged it back to him.

“It’s watering a vase. I can do it.” A firmer tug and a firmer tone.

“Emma, it’s fine!” His handle broke off of the vase and fell into the fountain. His eyes met hers and he shrugged. “Oops.”

“Don’t ‘oops’ me, Killian Jones!” Emma demanded, running a hand over her face. “That was my father’s favorite vase. He’s going to kill me.”

“I’m sure he won’t,” Killian replied. Emma took a step forward to yell at him. “Careful!” he shouted. Her feet had barely brushed the jagged edges of the vase and she stopped, frozen for a moment. Realizing that the handle was still in the water, she quickly stripped down to her chemise and dove in to fetch it. She winced when she felt the jagged edge of the broken piece cut into her hand, but she still held on when she came up for air.

“Emma, your hand! It’s cut!” Killian exclaimed. “Let me help.” “It’s fine,” Emma replied, fully aware that she was dripping with water and her chemise was essentially see through at this point.

“Let me help,” Killian insisted again, gingerly taking her hand in his own.

“So now you’re going to a gentleman?” she asked, trying to keep her breath from hitching at just how close they were standing to one another.

“Goodness only knows what’s been living in that pond and if we have to cut off your hand, I’ll never hear the end of it,” Killian replied. “And I’m always a gentleman.” He took a bottle out of his pocket and gently began pouring it on Emma’s hand. “Ah!” she hissed. “What the hell is that?” “Rum,” Killian replied, closing the bottle and taking her hand back in his. “And a bloody waste of it too.”

“What? Are you drinking on the job?” Emma asked, raising an eyebrow. “Hardly, but it makes for an exemplary disinfectant,” Killian replied. He took a handkerchief from his pocket and began wrapping it around her hand. Using his mouth to secure it, he very gingerly tied it in a knot to secure it in place. “There.”

“Thank you,” she said breathlessly, the hairs on her arms standing up.

“Is that all your hand is worth to you?” he teased, pulling back. “Perhaps some gratitude is in order.” He tapped his lips playfully, and Emma rolled her eyes.

“That’s what the thank you was for,” Emma retorted, her eyes shining with mirth. “Besides, it wouldn’t have happened if you had just let me fill the vase.” Killian quirked an eyebrow at her, and she smirked at him, knowing full well that he had blushed when pretty girls looked at him at Oxford. “Please. You couldn’t handle it.”

“Perhaps you’re the one who couldn’t handle it,” Killian taunted, popping the ‘t’ sound in ‘it’.

Emma stared at him for a moment before grabbing him by the suspenders and yanking him toward her. Her mouth slid against his and she desperately pressed into it for more. His arm hooked around her waist while his other hand went to her hair, trying to draw her in closer. She couldn’t help but moan as their lips slid together and he pushed back as if he could never get enough. When they broke for air, she was still clinging to his suspenders. They were sharing a breath, and though Emma couldn’t see Killian’s face--when had she closed her eyes?--he sounded as wrecked as he felt. Then, with a horrified spring of guilt, she realized that this was her best friend, and by kissing him, she could’ve compromised his future and his esteem in her father’s eyes.

“That was…” Killian started, the wonder still in his voice. “A one time thing,” Emma said frantically, pulling away from him. She gathered her things together and headed back into the house, leaving Killian there alone.

It broke her heart to leave him there, but she couldn’t put his future in danger.

The kiss made her realize that he meant too much to her for that.

#blaire's writing #csmm #csmm20 #captain swan movie marathon #cs ff #cs ff au #captain swan fanfiction

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