#sabres.... i just can't like you i'm sorry

[nahoney22]

Hi! i love your writing and was wondering if you could do the tbb (or just tech if you dont wanna do all of them) reaction to their gender neutral S/O pulling out their old instrument or color guard equipment from their marching band days and practicing what they remember (i dont even know if star wars has an equivalent to marching band/color guard lol but i picked an old practice flag up for the first time since high school earlier and the thought popped into my head for this request..) feel free to disregard this if it’s not something you wanna write, keep up the amazing work!!

Colour Guard Memories

The Bad Batch Boys X GN!Reader

How The Bad Batch react to you pulling out your old instrument or colour guard equipment.

warnings: none, gender neutral reader, can be read as platonic or romantic, Batchers admiring/encouraging reader.

authors note: this is a really cute idea and sorry it has took so long to do anon. In the UK we don’t really have marching bands/ colour guards aside from royal parades from what I know so I’ve relied on Google to help me out 😅 enjoy!

Echo

"Think we've got everything?" Echo asks, sealing the final box of your belongings.

As you survey the sea of packed boxes, you're struck by the realisation of just how many possessions you've gathered over the years. It's only now, in the process of moving out of your family home, that the extent of it hits you. After what feels like an eternity of packing and stacking, you're finally done and you couldn’t be any more grateful for Echo's helping hand.

"I hope so," you reply, wiping your brow and straightening up, hands on your hips. "Now, all that's left is to get it onto the ship." The prospect of lugging boxes onto the ship isn't exactly thrilling, but you're itching to kick back and relax.

Echo chuckles and reaches for one of the sealed boxes, but disaster strikes as the bottom gives way, sending its contents tumbling to the floor. "Well, that's just great," he says wryly.

Letting out a sigh, you join him in gathering up the scattered items. Amidst the chaos, something catches your eye: an old, familiar object. "No way!"

Startled by your sudden excitement, Echo turns to you. "What is it?"

"It's my Sabre!" you exclaim, holding up the cherished item for him to see.

He blinks in surprise. "Uh, your lightsaber?"

You playfully roll your eyes at Echo, a mischievous glint in your eyes, as you take the equipment into your hands and wave it at him. "You've known me long enough to know I'm not a Jedi, Echo," you tease, giving the Sabre a quick twirl. "It's from when I used to be be a colour guard for a marching band."

Echo chuckles, shaking his head in amusement. "I didn't know you did that."

"Yeah! I loved it. Want to see what I can still do?" you ask, a hint of excitement in your voice.

"The floor's all yours," he says, stepping back to give you space.

You take a moment to steady yourself, feeling the weight of the stainless steel Sabre in your hands. With a deep breath, you begin your routine, the familiar movements flooding back to you. As you twirl the Sabre with practiced precision, you can't help but feel a surge of nostalgia. However, in the midst of your performance, disaster strikes as the Sabre slips from your grip, narrowly missing a nearby window.

"Okay, okay, I'm a little rusty. Give me a second," you laugh sheepishly, quickly retrieving the saber and regaining your composure but Echo was still smiling and impressed throughout.

Determined to redeem yourself, you focus on each movement, executing smooth transitions and intricate spins. With each flourish, you feel a sense of satisfaction, the familiar rhythm of the routine bringing back fond memories. As you finally come to a graceful finish, you can't help but feel a sense of pride wash over you.

Echo applauds, a smile playing on his lips. "That was really impressive. You should've told me you could do that before."

"We all have our hidden talents," you grin, a twinkle in your eye as you admire the old memory in your hand before carefully tucking it back into the box. "Anyway, we should probably get going before I get distracted again."

“Well,” he says, resting a hand on your shoulder, “you should perform for me again sometime. If you want to that is.”

There’s a shine in his eyes, genuinely in awe of you and your talent. “I’ll definitely think about it.”

Hunter

Low on credits and desperate for some food to fill your stomachs, you and Hunter venture into a bustling market on a remote planet, hoping to find some opportunity to earn a bit of cash.

"See anything?" Hunter asks, strolling alongside you as you take in the sights and sounds of the market.

"Not really," you reply with a frown. The market is dimly lit, offering little in the way of useful materials, and the locals don't seem particularly welcoming. It's no wonder Hunter insisted on accompanying you.

But then, something does catch your eye. "Hey, that looks like one of my old flags," you remark, pointing to a colorful flag tucked away at the back of a small pop-up stall.

Hunter stops beside you, his interest piqued. "You used to spin those, didn't you?"

You chuckle at his phrasing, yet surprised that he remembers since it was just something you mentioned in passing once. "Yeah, I did. Not sure if I still have the touch, though."

A smirk spreads across Hunter's face as he holds up a finger, indicating for you to wait a moment. A bit embarrassed, you watch as he approaches the seller and strikes up a conversation. After a brief exchange, Hunter returns, flag in hand. "Let's put that theory to the test, shall we?" he suggests with a grin.

"Hunter! Did you just pay for that?" you exclaim incredulously as he shoves the pole into your hand.

"No," he says with a mischievous grin, his eyes sparkling with amusement. "But they said if you can impress them, you can keep it."

You narrow your eyes at him, a mixture of amusement and disbelief dancing in your gaze. "Fine. But I'm warning you," you declare, stepping into a clearing and scanning the area to ensure there's enough space before attempting to recreate a routine you haven't performed in years. "I'm not as good as I used to be."

Taking a deep breath, you grip the pole firmly and let muscle memory take over as you start spinning the flag with practiced precision. The fabric unfurls in vibrant arcs, catching the sunlight and casting colorful patterns across the ground. With each twirl and flourish, you feel a surge of nostalgia as memories of your days in the colour guard come flooding back.

As you continue your impromptu performance, you can't help but lose yourself in the rhythm of the routine, the flag becoming an extension of your body as you spin and swirl with grace.

Hunter is watching you silently and appears to be actually enamoured by your performance. His eyes are wide in surprise.

When you finally come to a graceful finish, you turn to Hunter with a triumphant smile, the flag held aloft in your hand. "How's that for impressing them?" you ask, a hint of pride in your voice.

“That was… wow.” Is all he says, a proud smile on his face. He takes one look to the seller who just gives a brief nod. “And the flag is yours it seems.”

Hunter comes up beside you once more but you feel a tug on your top, turning to face a young child who was holding out credits to you. Bashfully, you accept and the credits swiftly came flooding in.

“Heh, seems like you still got it.” He nudges your side playfully.

This could be a pretty safe way to earn some extra credits it seems.

Wrecker

"Wrecker, come look at this!" you call out excitedly, beckoning your companion over.

With Wrecker's assistance in tidying up the Marauder and transferring some items to the Remora, you stumble upon an unexpected treasure: an old snare drum tucked away amidst the clutter.

"Woah, what's tha’?" Wrecker asks, intrigued, as he joins you on the floor, his eyes fixed on the instrument in your hands.

"I used to play it in a marching band. Forgot I even had it," you reply with a wistful smile, the memories of your band days flooding back, tinged with nostalgia and a touch of sadness for times gone by.

Wrecker notices the flicker of emotion on your face and decides to lift your spirits. "Well, go on then. Give us a beat," he encourages, nudging the drum closer to you and offering a drumstick.

You smile gratefully, feeling a rush of anticipation as you accept the drumstick from his outstretched hand and pick up the matching one from the ground. "Just so you know," you say with a playful glint in your eye, "it sounds much better in a chorus rather than individually."

With a deep breath, you position the drumsticks in your hands, feeling the familiar weight and texture of the material. Closing your eyes, you let muscle memory guide your movements as you begin to play. The rhythmic tapping of the drum reverberates through the air.

As you lose yourself in the music, your fingers move effortlessly across the drum's surface, producing a lively beat that echoes off the walls of the ship. With each stroke, super fast and then skilfully slow, you feel a sense of liberation.

Wrecker watches in awe, a grin spreading cross his face as he listens to the infectious rhythm you create. For a moment, all worries and cares fade away, replaced by the joy of listening to you play. Flourishing a finish, your cheeks warm to Wrecker applauding enthusiastically.

"Tha’ was amazing!" he exclaims, his voice filled with genuine admiration. "You've still got it."

You grin, feeling a surge of pride at his words. "Thanks, Wrecker," you reply, a sense of contentment washing over you. "Maybe we should start our own band."

“Definitely!”

Tech

"Is this yours?" Omega's voice interrupts your thoughts, drawing your attention to the slim case she's holding. As you approach, a wave of nostalgia washes over you at the sight of the familiar case.

"I haven't seen this for a long time," you smile warmly, taking the case into your hands. Kneeling down, you blow the dust off and flip open the lid, revealing your old clarinet nestled inside.

Omega's eyes widen with curiosity as she peers at the instrument. "Wow, that's cool! Did you play it?"

You nod, a fond smile on your face. "Yeah, I used to. In a colour guard and in parades."

"Can you play something now?" she asks eagerly.

Before you can respond, Omega suddenly calls out, "TECH! COME HERE!"

Tech, engrossed in his data pad, looks up in surprise and heads your way. "What is the nature of my presence this time, Omega?"

Omega launches into an exaggerated explanation of your discovery and her request. "Listen to them play."

Tech adjusts his goggles and looks down at you with curious eyes. "I was not aware you could play any instrument."

"I haven't in a long time," you admit sheepishly, wiping the mouthpiece and adjusting the bridge keys. "But I can give it a try."

With a deep breath, you bring the clarinet to your lips and begin to play a soft, melancholic tune. The notes fill the air, weaving a gentle melody that seems to resonate with the quiet stillness of the surroundings. It was a gentle tune, a stark difference to the ones you played in parades.

As you play, you notice Tech glancing up from his data pad, his expression softening as he listens intently to the music. It's a rare sight to see him so engrossed in something other than his work, and you can't help but feel a sense of satisfaction knowing that your music has captured his attention.

By the time you finish the piece, Tech is still watching you, a thoughtful look on his face.

Omega bursts into a loud applause meanwhile Tech smiled at you. “I would not mind you playing that whilst I do some repairs... it’s rather relaxing.”

Crosshair

“What are you doing?” Crosshair's voice breaks your concentration mid-performance, and you freeze as your arms flail, causing the wooden rifle to slip from your grasp and clatter onto the grass.

You spin to face the clone, feeling a flush of embarrassment creeping up your neck. "I found my old rifle from when I used to perform," you explain quickly, bending down to retrieve the prop. With a flick of your foot, you send it spinning into the air, catching it effortlessly as it falls back down. "Want to see?"

Crosshair eyes the rifle with a hint of intrigue, his skepticism giving way to mild interest. "Perform? Rifles are for shooting. Not messing around with.”

“It’s wood, idiot.” You knock on the equipment before you then shrug, a sheepish grin tugging at your lips. "Anyway, it’s called rifle spinning. I used to do it as part of a routine in a performance group. It's more about coordination and showmanship than anything else. Wanna see?” You ask again.

Crosshair nods slowly, his gaze lingering on the rifle as you twirl it expertly in your hands. He stands back as you shows off your moves and he couldn’t hide the small impressed smirk forming on his lips. "You’re quite impressive I’ll give you that. But don't let it distract you from our mission." The compliment was rare but not one you were going to refuse as you give him a smile of thanks. But, he was right. There were more pressing matters at large.

You chuckle, nodding in agreement as you secure the rifle back in its holster. "Of course not. Just a little trip down memory lane."

Masterlist

Tags:

@littlefeatherr @kaitou2417 @eyecandyeoz @captxin-rex @jesseeka @theroguesully @ladykatakuri @jambolska-grozdova @arctrooper69 @padawancat97 @staycalmandhugaclone @ko-neko-san @echos-girlfriend @fiveshelmet @dangraccoon @plushymiku-blog @chrissywakingup @pb-jellybeans @nunanuggets @sleepycreativewriter @erellenora @zippingstars87 7 @ezras-left-thumb @the-rain-on-kamino @tech-aficionado @grizabellasolo @therealnekomari @tech-depression-inventory @brynhildrmimi @greaser-wolf @tinyreadersmur @seriowan @kaminocasey @marvel-starwars-nerd @ladytano420 @ladyzirkonia @thesith @raevulsix x @mssbridgerton @cw80831 @knightprincess @crosshairlovebot @imalovernotahater @id-rather-be-a-druid @the-bad-batch-baroness @lulalovez @green-alm0nd

[fairuzfan]

hi! I know you like getting messages of support from other nations so I hope you will find some worth in this one, however meandering. it's a bit related to your talk about food appropiation,

In the Sierra Madre, seeing a prickly pear is nothing less than a relief. The land is full of life, but it is of a kind that can be thoroughly indifferent to human life, so seeing the bright red of a tuna can feel like gift from the land. It is the friendliest plant around, in its context. A lone dot of color and edible flesh in a sea of thornscrub. There's spines, sure, but those are a non-issue if you know how to handle the plant. It's not hard to peel the fruit one-handed, using just a sharp knife and a flat rock. My grandpa used to do that, and still does when we visit the ranges in San Luis Potosí where he used to shepherd sheep and goats as a child. The flesh is refreshing on a hot day and the sweetness warms you on cold one.

Which makes it all very shocking that Israelis adopted it as a national symbol, calling it "sabra", and also giving that name to the "native"-born Israeli populace. They say it is because they have a sweet interior surrounded by tough spines to pierce their enemies, but that does not sound right. The only way you could possibly see it as unfriendly or standoffish or as a symbol of self-defense, is if you are unfamiliar with land and context and go shoving youself places you shouldn't be. I can't help but think of their "making the desert bloom" mindset, and their misunderstanding of natural characteristics as hostility.

When Madagascans introduced the plant into their lifestyle, they used the fruit to feed cattle, and stave off hunger. And when French colonizers tried to get past the walls of cactus they wove with it, they were stung. It was only the engineered sabotage of the cactus with pests that ended that era of self-sufficience. I think the people of Madagascar were infinitely more worthy of taking it as their symbol!

I guess what I am trying to say is that Israel does not just merely appropiate things that are geographically close to it, and similarly, it is not just its neighbors that take stock of its, wrongness, to put it mildly. As much as Israel would like to believe that support for Palestine is a fad, we simply are not as incapable of drawing parallels as they would like us to be.

I think of Palestine every time I have to try and master my anxiety around U.S. Border Patrol. I tell myself I'm not allowed to back down give up when other people haven't given up, with walls in their own land. I hope that thought helps!

this is such an amazing message filled with so much thought, thank you SO much for sending this in. We also eat sabr in Palestine, I remember my mom and grandma talking about eating it back in the 80's when it was more available.

I did not know that about Madagascar, thank you for telling me. I'm going to write this down in my sketchbook for illustration ideas.

I hope that one day soon, the borders that are so violent to our peoples fall and are replaced with a kindness and community that we dream of. I'm sorry that you have to encounter such division in your life with the border wall, but I hope that we both work together to tear them down :)

[itzmshadow]

Okay guys I'm doing something different I have a story that's been collecting dust and I want to share it with you guys cause I just love yous guys sm

Also just don't judge I was prolly sleep deprived when I made it- (I love writing I'm trying to get back into it though so-)

Also adding a headcannon here before we start- time steve uses those really cutesy nicknames like dear and honey just because he is defintly that silly (nicknames reserved for Sabre only❗️❗️)

COTTAGE DUO FLUFF WITH A SPRINKLE OF ANGST <333

Enjoy please

'It was getting pretty dark wasn't it' Sabre thought to himself after finishing some notes for a future meeting that's happening in a couple days with the other leaders about random problems that are happening around the kingdom.

He looked around his room that was slowly being covered in light shades of orange yellow and reds as the sun set further across the horizon he looked around and realized that his room was way too quiet.

Him and time shared a room so there was usually a ticking noise from the clock mask time wore on his head or from the pocket watch he keeps in his coat pocket but now it's just silence which made Sabre worry about time. Times an adult he shouldn't be worrying about him but he can't help but be worried. That's just how he is, he's normally always tense, he's scared of anything loud and sudden, he's scared that time is going to find every single one his flaws and end up hating him or believing that he is still apart of the darkness.

He laid his elbows on the table in front of him and laid his head in his arms to overthink everything that could be happening right now outside of this safe comforted bedroom.

What if sol broke out of jail and started a riot in the middle of the kingdom  where time was trapped in the middle of the crowds slowly being trampled- or what if there was a sudden seige and since he wasn't in the actual castle part he wouldn't know to defend the castle until its too late and the leaders end up kicking him out because he wasn't there to help them-

His spiraling was interrupted by something touching his shoulder making him jump up and hit his head on whatever was behind him- behind him something was behind him.

He flies around in a panic ready to fight whoever was trying to get to him only to find the same person he was just worrying about holding his nose in pain.

"Time!" He runs up to him and raises a shaky hand to try and help only to take a step back in fear of hurting him again. "I'm- im sorry time I thought you were something else I hurt you I'm so sorry"

Time finally raised his head after checking if his nose was bleeding, it wasn't it just hurt like hell, and took a step forward to grab Sabres shaking hand and hold it up to his face so Sabre had to look up at time.

"You didn't hurt me, I'm the one who snuck up on you, which was a mistake on my part, it wasn't your fault you were thinking and I inturuppted" time pulled Sabre closer to him.

Sabre shakes his head, "no I'm I should be over this, sol is in jail and there was no reason for me to freak out like I did I'm sorry"

Time lifts Sabres hand and kisses it, "Sabre dear, I know you didn't mean to freak out but out of all people I think you deserve to, your so strong its honestly sometimes kind of scary" time softly laughs at that as does Sabre.

"You put up all these walls to protect everyone around you when everyone around you wants to protect you, you've taken care of us for so long let us take care of you" time lifts Sabres head to look him in the eyes and smiles softly then leans in to kiss his forehead.

"I love you darling, I hope you know that" Sabre nods and sniffles as if he was just crying, he was but you wouldn't catch him dead before he admits that, even though time knew.

"Cmon have you eaten anything today sabre?" The brunette shakes his head and Burries it in times chest shaking his head. "M not that hungry" time nods and slowly pulls Sabre towards their shared bed setting him down. " since it's been a hard day I'll let dinner slide but your getting loving time made breakfast tomorrow, alright?"

Sabre laughs and nods then leans into times chest who sits behind Sabre and slowly leans back until his back hits the bed and soon Sabre is just laying on top of him as time plays with his hair.

" I love you Sabre and I want you to know, no matter what happens I'll be here for you and take care of you the way you have taken care of everyone else"

The two lay together like that for the time being until Sabre eventually fall asleep on time steve making the older smile down on him.

The two stayed like that with time running his fingers through Sabres hair and he ended up falling asleep holding onto to Sabre.

[allthatmay]

I am waiting so patiently for Ch 4 🥺 Do you have any snippets to offer in these trying times? You started my ShanksAce addiction and now you’re the only one who can feed it. I am struggling lol🙏🏻.

Glad I'm not alone in my Shanks/Ace addiction! These are trying times for us all 🙏🏻 I do appreciate how patiently everyone's been waiting for the chapter. I can't help that it's taking its time getting finished, but I am sorry for the wait!

Here's a teeny, tiny, wee, little preview for you all! (But for you in particular, Anon. 😉)

Maddeningly, even in the rain—perhaps especially in the rain—Shanks is devastatingly handsome. He looks particularly lovely out by the sea like this, mired in the growing fog. His hair’s all tousled by the wind, his shirt blown open, his sabre hanging incongruously against his floral-patterned trousers. He must be able to read Ace’s mind with the way he inclines toward him, satisfaction written into the features of his face.

“Do I get a proper welcome?” he asks.

In lieu of a reply, Ace steps right up against Shanks and pulls him into a kiss, wet lips meeting warm breath. Tenderness slips between his ribs like a knife pressed up against his heart. He can feel the whole shape of Shanks, the heat of him, the strength in his hard muscles. The rain is beginning to soak them through, but it’s the sensation of something being nestled atop Ace’s ear that has him pulling away.

“Another flower?” he asks, carefully reaching for it.

Shanks nods, smoothly adding, “Though I’m yet to find one as pretty as you.”

“Suck up,” Ace says.

It’s a beautiful flower. The petals are silken beneath Ace’s fingertips, as red as the hibiscus he’d last been given. They’re round and layered enough that they collect the falling rain between them like morning dew, bringing out their refreshing scent.

“Camellia,” he recognises, twisting the stem between his fingers.

Shanks smiles. “Do you know what it means?”

“Naw. Well, a little bit. Depends where you go, doesn’t it? Makino taught me some of the common meanings in the East Blue but not much else. Don’t think she knew.”

“Makino, hm? She’s a shrewd woman, that one.”

“Yeah. She's always been good to me.” Ace squints at the flower, trying to remember what Makino said. Once he does, his eyes flicker up to meet Shanks’, skirting past his smug smile. “Do you know what this means, old man?”

“Hmm, well, let’s see…” With an air of drama, Shanks reaches into his pocket and withdraws a small, well–loved book. Heedless of the rain, he cards through the pages until he reaches the right one, at which point he loudly recites: “‘The red camellia historically symbolises a noble death to the samurai of Wano—’” He blinks, then says, “Hang on a minute.”

Ace cracks up, having to put a hand to his hat when he folds forward with the force of it. “Shanks!” he gets out between breaths. “The look on your face!”

Shanks carries on, flipping to the previous page. “Ah, here we go! ‘Throughout much of the world, the red camellia symbolises passion, romance, deep desire, and resilient beauty.’” He snaps the book shut, returning it to his pocket. “All of which I relate to you, angel.”

Just like that, it's not so funny anymore. Ace clears his throat, caught off guard by the sudden sincerity.

“So… not the death thing?” he half–heartedly teases.

“Not the death thing,” Shanks agrees, grinning. “Compelling though it may be.”

[stereax]

☕️ things you think the nhl genuinely does well for their players? And/or things you wish could/would change in the org?

I think, to start, you need to overhaul how player safety works. The lack of consequences for players is nuts. Repeat offenders need to be penalized appropriately. You can't let dangerous players like Matt Rempe continue to be the poster children for CTE.

Player assistance - I'm not sure how effective this is. We've had players like Valeri Nichushkin fail it; we've had former players like Scott Darling deride it. We've also had players like Spencer Knight and Connor Ingram who've cited the help they get from it as crucial to their mental health.

THE MEDICAL STAFF. Oh my god the medical teams are AWFUL in the NHL. I know it's the standard to play through injuries but holy fuck. On the Devils alone we had three cases of medical staff failing to spot a concussion or other major injury after a head hit and letting players continue to play for several more shifts before pulling them. You hear actual horror stories annually of players saying "oh, I messed up my shoulder in game 4 and played with it the entire season" (Tim Stutzle) or "oh, my knee's been fucked since January, sorry for not putting up more points" (Elias Pettersson) or "oh, I played a playoff game with a broken sternum and I couldn't even dress myself, so if I got hit there, there's a chance I could have died" (Matthew Tkachuk). We're seeing that players who prioritize their health, who sit out to recover instead of pushing their bodies (think Sidney Crosby here) are able to continue playing at a high level past 35, when previously this was considered too old to be a top talent NHL player.

Tying into that, LTIR. Teams need to be incentivized to use LTIR so that their stars can heal, goddamn it. You tell me "close the cap circumvention loopholes", I reply "I'd prefer if players are playing healthy and not forced to play while hurt, and LTIR is a major step in allowing players to heal without penalizing a team for their injuries". I don't know why it's a buzz topic now that teams like Vegas are "abusing LTIR" - good??? Every team in the league should "abuse LTIR" if it means helping to preserve the quality of life for its players down the line??? Why is this controversial???

But also - players who are definitely not coming back to play in the NHL (think Shea Weber, Carey Price, Nicklas Backstrom) should have the ability to retire without losing out on the final years of their contract while not penalizing the teams with them on their roster. Currently, these players undergo "LTIRetirement", a process where they're stashed on the LTIR until their contract is up, at which point they officially retire. This not only disadvantages the teams carrying these contracts but also puts unnecessary burdens on these players. Think how the 2018 WJC perpetrators were considered "NHL non-roster", effectively having no cap hit, and do something similar for LTIRetirement.

Just... eugh, I really wish some fundamentals about hockey culture and the culture of injury were changed. Every time I hear about how a player is trying to regain day-to-day functioning after an injury (go read up on Tanner Pearson's hand injuries and how the Canucks bungled the surgeries), part of me dies inside. Jack Eichel literally had to force his own trade out of his team because the Sabres weren't willing to give him medical autonomy. Which is another thing - the player should ALWAYS have final say in their injury treatment, not the teams. Whoever decided that... I'm shaking my fist.

[maxknightley]

Hey I'm very stupid (like genuinely) and I kind of get confused when people describe Biden as all kind of horrible things and then mention Donald Trump offhandedly. Are you saying they are both the same old white men or am I misunderstanding. I've heard people say Trump is better than Biden but I don't understand why people say that especially since he would probably just be doing the same thing as Biden is doing if he won the election. I don't need an explanation of things both have done I'd just like to understand the tone since I just can't understand what you mean via text. Sorry if my question is frustrating.

to be clear I do not actually think Trump would be better than Biden. the best-case scenario of a Trump presidency is that a combination of 1. his incompetence, 2. his ego, and 3. the center-left again being galvanized into some form of action will inhibit his ability to ruin the world further.

the real problem is that both Biden and Trump will almost assuredly continue to support slaughter and religious/ethnic hatred throughout the world in service of imperial interests. this is nothing new, mind you, but I do think their presidencies represent a particularly intense and naked type of brutality, one in which the few lines that the American empire would even consider not crossing are completely ignored. whichever one of them wins, I expect this shit country to continue turning a blind eye to the nation-state of Israel's genocidal ambitions, to aid Ukraine only as long as it's convenient (and to continue pressuring them to submit to the whims of international capital), to continue pointlessly sabre-rattling against the PRC and Iran, etc. etc. etc.

moreover Biden's administration has been remarkably apathetic about the ongoing conservative push to censure any public form of transness or sexuality. the few beneficial things that arguably can be attributed to the Biden administration largely couldn't have happened without organized labor anyway, certainly don't outweigh the massacre of thousands overseas; moreover, the sheer extent to which they fucked up the coronavirus response in favor of saving an economy which is still completely fucked anyway cannot be overstated.

tl;dr they're both shitheads and I expect that this country will continue to get worse until, god willing, it balkanizes entirely and ceases to exist as a superpower. you can still feel free to vote - and in the case of local elections, where your vote can have considerably more impact, I would actually encourage this - but the presidential election in particular is going to be a shitshow from start to finish

[thedissociatives]

Heeeyyyy, I'm so so intrigued by your hockey posting. I'd love to know more about Fedorov, like what's the lore, what makes him special? Have a nice day/ night <333

good morning/afternoon/evening anon! since you asked so nicely i'll try my best but i do tend to forget everything i know when i have to actually explain it. there is a lot of lore tho so i'm not gonna go over all of it (mainly the bits that interest me the most + some other stuff). i guess what really makes him special (at least to me) is the fact that we don't get players like this anymore. and i'm not talking playing style here (the impact of euro hockey players of the 90s on the nhl today is still so obviously there). a lot of his early career was directly impacted by cold war politics, and since those circumstances haven't existed for a while now, we don't get this insane type of backstories and lore anymore. i should also make it clear that i'm a massive nerd who sat in classrooms for years learning abt soviet stuff which i think definitely has an impact on who My Guys are

seriously there is a lot under the cut so be warned because i did get carried away with myself A Lot (i literally wrote over 1k words on this. sorry in advance)

ok so. sergei started playing "pro" hockey in the soviet union in the mid 80s (i don't think this is the place to explain whether these players were pro or amateur so will leave it like that), first in minsk (only for a year) before being picked up by cska moscow- the central army team. these guys made up most of the national team, which can probably be explained by the fact that their head coach also coached the national team (god that's a bit of a mouthful, but incredibly relevant). he wasn't the only rookie on the team that season; another kid (i think they were both like 16 at the time ?) called alex mogilny had also just arrived in moscow. they would become good friends. sergei would play three seasons for cska before being called up for the national team- he was going to the 1989 world championship. alex would be there, too, having already played on the team before. naturally, the ussr won gold (as they did almost every year). but that doesn't mean everything was good with the players. not long too after the tournament, some of the older players would finally get permission to play in the nhl, but for the younger guys it was looking like they had no way of getting out any time soon. in the days between the end of the championship and the soviet team's flight home, mogilny apparently approached fedorov and asked him to go to america with him- sergei said no, worried about what would happen to his family. alex would go anyway, disappearing for a few days before popping up in buffalo ready to join the sabres. (this might seem irrelevant right now but it's actually really not- i'm getting there now)

that same summer, sergei would be drafted in the fourth round by detroit. this choice may or may not have been influenced by steve yzerman telling them sergei was better than him. after a bit of back and forth, they got him to defect after cska played a series of games in north america. it literally sounds like the type of shit they write in spy films it was fucking mental. this made him only the second soviet to defect in order to play in the nhl i'm pretty sure (defo the second in like 18 months- funnily enough it was his bestie who was the first one. what a coincidence), but they weren't the first two from the other side of the iron curtain to do that. might be wrong but i think that honour goes to the stastny brothers. anyway. when sergei got to detroit he wore 91 because he wanted to "be like stevie" or some insane shit like that. which i literally think about all the time. like seriously what was that about sergei.

okok can't not talk about the russian five so doing that now. since idk how much you know about hockey i'll do a better job on this bit. after sergei arrived in detroit, management must've figured they could get more russians. over the next couple of years they got vladimir konstantinov (who was drafted the same year as sergei) and slava kozlov to make the jump to the states. since i'm mainly talking about sergei i won't go into how they got those two but it's just as unbelievable as you'd expect. after the 1994-95 lockout, the wings traded for another russian- slava fetisov. if you ever want to learn about soviet hockey you'll hear a lot about this guy, and for good reason too. he won two olympic gold medals and seven world championships with the soviet union, and captained most of those teams. obviously adding a guy with that much experience winning was a smart choice imo, even if he hadn't won anything in the nhl yet. by now the wings had four russian players- why not add a fifth ? in 1994 the wings were embarrassed in the playoffs, losing to san jose. it just happened that sj happened to have two of the older soviets who had fought for the right to play in north america. one of them was igor larionov- probably the smartest guy to ever play hockey. it was his tactics (and refusal to change his style of play) that led to his team's success in the first round. and i guess detroit didn't ever want to deal with that again because they ended up trading for the guy in the first part of the 1995-96 season. the russian five first played together in calgary, where they played that style of soviet hockey that nhlers could never really wrap their heads around at the time. they walked all over the flames in their own building, and would continue to do the same to the rest of the league. the five would be a key part of the 1997 stanley cup-winning team, which was the first wings team to lift the cup in over forty years.

sergei stayed to win a few more cups, and then left the city. he signed w the ducks in anaheim, bleached his hair and moved out to california (i think we can all resonate with wanting to change our appearance and move thousands of miles away from where we've spent over a decade building out lives amiright). from what i can tell, this move was Not Liked by detroit's owners (honestly i can't see any other reason his number hasn't been retired there). he'd bounce around a couple more nhl teams before going back to russia to play on the same team as his brother, eventually retiring in 2012.

jumping to 2015, that year's hockey hall of fame inductees included sergei (and nick lidstrom, one of his detroit teammates and one of the best defencemen to every play the game). it was basically a 90s wings reunion. in sergei's induction speech, he did like everyone else and thanked a bunch of people who helped him out throughout his career. and, you know, it was all the expected stuff (hockey guys can be so predictable sometimes), but "to my captain, steve yzerman" still fucking gets me. it had been twelve years since he'd worn a wings jersey. my captain. i think you get my point but i'm gonna have to stop there because i can't carry on and be remotely normal about it.

oh and in 2021, after spending a few years bouncing around random jobs for the team, cska announced that fedorov would be taking over as head coach. he went back to the team where all this started. now i don't know how exactly he is with his team but i sure hope he learned enough from his days there as a player under tikhonov on exactly how not to treat your players. cska won back to back gagarin cups (the trophy awarded to the khl team who wins the playoffs) in sergei'd first two seasons behind the bench, and they're probably looking to make it a threepeat with the playoffs starting today (?)

[butterflyintochains]

Le Nouveau Regime

A kind of successor to 'Of All They Survey'. Basically, Sid and Geno retire together after their 2025 Cup run. Leaving Pittsburgh down a captain and their longest serving Alternate. Of course, they stay in the city for their first season as retired players, their family still needs them, right? But, little does the team and city itself know, Sid has chosen his successor, and the organisation could not agree more. There is still a member of their trio active on the team. His husband is also right there. As is the outgoing captain's eldest son.

Welcome, to Le Nouveau Regime, Pittsburgh.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two AM, and he still can't fucking sleep. He really envies his husband right now, fast asleep with nothing on his mind. For Kris Letang, everything changes tomorrow evening. He knew about Sid and Geno retiring together, that was a long discussion they had over summer, he'll miss them more than he can say. But, they're still going to be in the building everyday, working with Kyle to guide the team into a better future after their sixth cup run. It's not that, it's the decision Sid made last week. Kris is deeply honoured to be doing this, and he wants to do as well as he can for as long as he has left. But, he'll be damned if it doesn't terrify him on a cosmic level. He turns over in bed again, rousing Erik from his sleep. ''Kris...'' Erik asks, blinking a few times.

Kris leans over to kiss his husband's forehead. ''Sorry, Erik, can't sleep, that's all. Go back to sleep, I'm okay.'' Erik raises an eyebrow, and flicks his lamp on. ''Well, what kind of husband would I be if I left you in your head like this? Talk to me, hjartat, what's going on in that beautiful head?''

Kris says, taking a deep breath as Erik clasps their hands together. ''The handover, amour, the captaincy. I've not been a captain since Val D'Or, and I'm just... worried that I'm not worthy of it.'' Kris confesses to his other half in the safety of their bedroom, he'd not dare voice this in front of the boys tomorrow. ''It's just... I'm not Sid, I'm not Mario. I'm all fire, and passion, and different.''

Erik tears up, he hates hearing his husband be all insecure like this, he knows the wonderful man he married. ''Someday, I hope you can see the you I see, you know? No, you're not Sid or Mario. You're you. Passionate, strong, determined, the conscience of this city.'' Erik says, reminding his beloved of 2015. ''Remember when I was made captain in Ottawa? After Jason left it to me? I called you up before that game, remember how scared I was? Scared of not being good enough because I'm not Canadian?''

Kris nods, massaging Erik's hand with his thumb. ''Yeah, I do.'' Erik asks him. ''Who do you think got me on that rink?'' Kris shrugs, Erik kisses his nose. ''You did, sweetheart.'' Erik continues. ''You will be our captain, Sid trusts you, Geno trusts you, so does Mario. You, Kris Letang, are my best friend, my husband, my soulmate... and my captain. I am so proud to be your Alternate tomorrow. Rusty and I will be with you every step of the way.'' Kris sniffles, what stars aligned to give him this man? ''I love you, Erik Karlsson.''

Erik kisses him. ''I love you too. Sleep now?'' Kris nods, Erik turns his light off, and they finally get some sleep together. Kris wrapped in the safe arms of his husband.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The day of their first home game against the Sabres, Kris and Erik dress into their gameday suits after their pre-game nap. Erik laces up his shoes, and grabs his keys. Kris gives one last glance up to his four cup rings, and joins him at the front door. They jump in the car together, and get going to PPG Paints. They drive in silence, a comfortable quiet in the car as they drive down to the arena, they've never needed to talk much. Erik drives, and Kris tries not to have another anxiety attack about what he's taking on. He contents himself with the knowledge that he's got his husband and nephew with him. Sid and Geno will be with Kyle for the game after the ceremony. Flower has even moved back to town for Kris' first season as captain. He's not doing this alone, thank God. Finally, they arrive at the arena. Erik looks to Kris, and asks him. ''Ready, sweetheart?''

Kris nods, and says. ''Come what may, darling.'' They get out of the car, and head inside hand in hand. Meeting up with Lars and Marcus as they head to get out of their suits. They grab something to eat, somehow Kris convinced Erik to drop the raw onions from his pre-game meal. ''Excited for tonight, captain?'' Drew innocently asks. Erik rolls his eyes, and says. ''Drew, maybe don't say that? He's been anxious for a week about this.''

Kris finishes eating, and says. ''I'm just treating this as any other game, Drew.''

Jack asks his surrogate dad, Kris has parented all of the young defencemen on the team for years, and done an amazing job at it too. ''How? You're gonna be the captain soon!'' Kris clears his dishes away, and says. ''I've been in this league for my whole adult life, Ivy, this is just another night.'' He kisses Erik's cheek, and goes for some quiet time in an empty media room, trying desperately to keep himself calm. Then, the call to get suited up for the ceremony comes. Kris holds his jersey in his hands, the A will be going on for the last time, he's grown so attached to it. He pulls the jersey over his head, and waits for the team's signal to get out onto the ice. Geno will be giving the Alternate jerseys out, Sid will be giving the Captain's jersey. The team gather at the bench, the incoming core ready to receive their new letters. After a presentation of the past captains, Sid and Geno come out onto the rink to a roar of applause, the new jerseys in their hands. ''With three cups as a Penguin, and a King Clancy nomination, we present to you, Alternate Captain - Bryan Rust!'' The announcer says. Rusty skates up to receive his new jersey from Geno. Both Sid and Geno embrace their surrogate son. ''The winner of three Norris Trophies and a long-awaited Stanley Cup, Alternate Captain - Erik Karlsson!'' Erik squeezes Kris' hand, and skates up to exchange his plain jersey for his new one. ''Finally, our longest tenured player. Four time Stanley Cup winner and 2023 Masterton Trophy winner. Your new Captain - Kris Letang!'' Kris skates up to Sid to receive his new jersey, the name an number the same, just a C where the A once was. ''I'll not let you both down, I promise.'' He says.

Geno hugs him. ''We know you won't, Legend.'' Sid places his hands on Kris' shoulders, and says to him. ''That's why I chose you for this, Tanger.''

Kris looks to his team, who are all applauding him, He takes a breath, and faces the fans with his new letter. He's pleasantly surprised at the wave of cheers he gets, maybe Erik was right last night? Maybe this won't be so bad?

After warmups, Kris is taken for a ceremonial faceoff against Sabres Captain, Alex Tuch. Then, they get on with the game. Which they win 3-1 to get their season started. Kris, Erik, and Rusty are the last off the ice. Back in the dressing room, Sully says. ''Very pleased with tonight, boys, to our new leadership - amazing job tonight. Johnny, Zuck - welcome home.'' He picks up the new helmet, and says. ''I think this has to go to our new captain.'' He hands it to Kris. Kris stands, and says. ''Good to be back, proud to be the captain, let's keep this up. Bunts, Glasser, Drew - good job on the goals. I'll not let you guys down, I promise.''

After media, Kris and Erik get home, and collapse on the couch together with something to eat. Then, it's time for bed, they're both thankful they're beginning this new era of the team with a five game homestay. For a change, Kris is out like a light, the rush of today catching up to him. Erik rests his head on Kris' chest, and joins him in sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few slower days pass, the team are hard at work in training for their game against Calgary. The third game of their homestay, they won in a shootout against Columbus in the second game. After this comes a four game roadtrip to Montreal, Toronto, Ottawa, and Winnipeg before coming home for two. Kris finds that the anxiety of being captain is lessening over time, the fans seem to be taking to it at any rate. Having one of his boys back does kind of help, he's missed Olli, Johnny, and PO more than he thought he would. Having Johnny back helps ease that worry. Rusty is every bit the leader for the forwards he's been raised to be. And, having Erik with him is all he's ever dreamed of. Sully and Quinn gather the troops around for a discussion about the powerplay and penalty kill units for the season. ''Alright, for the powerplay unit we're running with: Rust, Eller, O'Connor, Karlsson, and Letang.'' Sully says. Three fifths of the veterans unit from last season's cup run, the unit worked like clockwork. ''For the PK, we're going: Acciari, Hayes, Pettersson, and Zucker.'' Quinn says.

The top powerplay unit gets to work refining some drills and formations. Already, Kris and Erik are being given a nickname together by the rest of the team. Sid and Geno are and were the Two Headed Monster that will never change. But, the team took to calling Kris and Erik the Twin Terrors during last season's playoffs, and the name has stuck into Kris' captaincy. Drew wires a shot to Rusty, who sends it past Tristan's ear. ''Good work, boys, PK up next!'' Quinn says.

The powerplay unit take a sit down, and the penalty kill unit go over some drills together. ''How have you been lately, Kris?'' Sully asks after training.

Kris towels his hair dry. ''Good, actually, feels weird being the captain and on the PA, but I wear both with pride.''

Kyle asks him about his work with the PA. ''Do you want us to give that job to someone else, Kris?''

Kris shakes his head, he's been the team's representative for almost a decade now, and he'd love to keep that up. ''No, I'm happy to keep on with both positions. Erik thinks I take on too much, but I'm fine. I would love a backup rep, though.''

Kyle nods, noting that down onto his phone. ''I'll bring that up at the next team meeting.'' Kris goes for lunch with the rest of the team, glad nobody has been treating him differently with this whole captaincy thing. In any other world, he'd have never wanted that C on his jersey, and part of him still finds it weird, but Sid wanted him to have this, so he wears it with pride.

The team gets in for the game against Calgary, they suit up together in their stalls. The ballot for Kris' backup PA representative is narrowed down to: Bunting, Beauvillier, Pettersson, or Jarry. The team are talking about their plans for the roadtrip across Eastern Canada when Sully comes in for the read. He addresses the troops, the slip of paper in his hand. ''Here we go for tonight, let's make this count, boys. Up front, we've got: O'Connor, Glass, and Rusty.'' The room cheers. ''Up back, we've got: Letang and Marino.'' Johnny looks to Kris, his middle boy come home at last. ''In net, Ned! Let's get going!''

The game starts strong, Beauvillier netting an early goal on his first shot of his first shift of the game for 1-0. Acciari stealing the puck from a corner scrum and making off with it puts them up 2-0 going into first intermission. ''We're doing good, mes amis, let's keep this up. We stay together, and stay calm. The Flames are an annoying team, they will try and get on our nerves, we don't let them.'' Kris addresses the room, taking a leaf from Sid's book of a captain's address between periods. ''Owen, how are you doing these past couple of games?'' Kris asks the rookie, Owen Pickering, who he personally drafted. ''Good, thank you for drafting me, captain.'' Kris says, a big smile on his face. ''You're very welcome, kid.''

The second is scoreless, Kris directing the team whenever he's on the ice. But, to their credit, Calgary are holding onto their line. Midway through the third period, Kris gets the puck on his stick during a powerplay for the team, he passes to Erik, who dekes out Kadri, passing to Drew. Drew fires the puck past Vladar's elbow. The first goal in almost forty minutes puts them up 3-0. That ends up being the last goal of the game, their third win in a row to open the new season. Kris is among those taken for media after the game. ''Three games, six points picked up, how pleased are you with this, as the new captain?''

Kris says, sliding his wedding ring back onto his finger with a smile. ''I'm very happy with the results so far, still early days yet, I'm glad we're picking up these early wins, gives us some breathing room for the opening stretch.''

Another journalist asks him. ''How are you feeling having Marino back this season?''

Kris says, sifting in his stall. ''Great, good to have one of my boys back. I always thought Olli, Johnny, and PO fled the nest too early. It's good having him and Ivy.''

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They beat the Hurricanes 2-1 in overtime to finish their homestay, with Owen getting his first goal of his career. Then, comes the roadtrip across eastern Canada. Kris was more than a little bit terrified of the game in Montreal, coming home as captain for the first time. But, he got to sleep in his own bed with his husband, so it balanced out. They even won that game! 5-4 in a shootout with Kris netting two goals, his first goals as captain. They've got three free days between the Montreal and Ottawa games when they land in Ottawa. The first real stretch of days off of the season so far, and Sully has them on rest orders for the first day off. This is going to be a long season, they're defending Stanley Cup winners, so they need their rest as much as they need to play well. Erik gets his husband up early for a walk along the Rideau Canal after breakfast. They so rarely get true alone time during the season, even now as teammates, there's always someone poking around, especially with their two surrogate sons around. Johnny and Jack are wonderful, but they need some alone time. They set off into the chilly morning, arm in arm. For today, they're not the Captain and his top Alternate, or Letang and Karlsson, they are Kris and Erik, and that's okay with them. ''Never realised how beautiful Ottawa was until we got in yesterday evening.'' Kris says. He's only ever come here for work, and to spend time with Erik. ''Sweetheart, I played here for a long time, most of it you were with me.''

Kris says, gently nudging his shoulder. ''Back then, the attraction of this place was you, not the city, darling.'' Kris adds. ''Same goes for San Jose, actually.''

Erik laughs, some things never change. ''I guess I felt the same for Pittsburgh. Back then, the city was fine, I guess? But, you were there, so it became the best city on earth. Now, it's home.'' They keep on walking in silence, listening to the city around them, they've never needed to be constantly talking to each other, even back when they first got together. This comfortable quiet is something they've found in each other. In the loudest sport in the world, two franchise defencemen have found calm in each other somehow. ''Sid told me he's planning a trip to Russia with Geno for the summer. Says it's a surprise.'' Kris says.

Erik chuckles, and asks. ''Has his Russian improved any?'' He can't imagine Sid won't have done his homework ahead of time, but it always pays to speak the local language. ''Yeah, he's at sentences unaided, or rather back at sentences unaided.'' Kris says.

Erik asks, furrowing his brows at that, there's still so much he doesn't know. ''Back at that? What d'you mean?'' Kris laughs, it's funny how these events coincide really. ''It's funny, actually. The same time I was learning Swedish for you, and you were studying French for me. Sid was learning Russian for Geno.'' He smiles fondly at the memory of the books spread out on dining tables, and Geno drilling Sid on Cyrillic. ''Yeah? Tell me more.'' Erik says, intrigued.

Kris says, dusting off his coat. ''He was studying Russian, doing a pretty good job at it too. Kinda tripped himself up by trying to read Dostoevsky right away, but he was getting really good. Then, he just... stopped, for some reason.'' Kris has never known why, perhaps the duties he was tasked with got in the way? Geno's English got too good? The kids came along and took up time? Either way, Kris is proud of himself for keeping up on his Swedish, even with the leadership stuff, hockey, PA, and his own boys coming along.

Erik asks, sitting down on a bench next to the canal. ''Is that why he got all weird at us speaking each other's languages?'' Kris nods, and sits down next to his husband. ''Yeah, I guess he just wasn't ready for us being trilingual.'' Kris remarks, linking their arms again. ''That said, you're sexy when you speak French.''

Erik leans over to kiss Kris on the cheek. ''Likewise for you in Swedish.''

There's a comfortable lull in conversation again, Erik can feel that Kris wants to ask him something, but he leaves it be, Kris never responds well to being cornered. Neither does Erik himself for that matter. ''Erik, can I ask you something, captain to captain?'' Kris asks. Erik says, meeting his gaze. ''Yeah, always, Kris.''

Kris clears his throat. ''How am I doing? Am I doing a good job so far?''

Erik smiles softly, and nods. ''Yeah, you're doing so well. We're doing well as a team, you've got the room, the city, and the media. The kids are in the palm of your hand.'' Erik adds, he's biased, this is his husband after all. ''I'm a very proud Alternate, and husband right now.''

Kris nods, pressing a kiss to Erik's lips, if Erik is happy with him, that's worth a thousand Stanley Cups. ''Good, I'm glad.''

They come out of the Ottawa game with only their second loss of the season, a close run 4-3 shootout loss. Then, they get on the road to Toronto. Their first game back against the Leafs since game six of the eastern Conference Final. Kris has had an idea, he thinks Rusty could do with some help on the front end, so he calls a leadership meeting before they play the Leafs. ''What's going on, Kris?'' Rusty asks.

Kris says, pulling up a chair at the table they're using. ''I'm going to ask Kyle to give Lars an A, you need some help up front, I just want to know how you feel about that.''

Rusty looks delighted, he has been kinda lonely up front, especially with how Kris has Erik up back. ''I'd love that, Kris. Karl, how d'you feel about that?''

Erik nods, taking his hair down from its ponytail for the game. ''I'm good to add to the core. Anything you feel is best for us, Kris, do it.'' Kris nods, and says. ''Thank you so much, both of you. I'll talk to him after the game with Lars.''

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After the third period, they're tied 5-5 with a hattrick duel from Marner and Rusty in the second. Reminding Kris of the hattrick duel between Sid and Ovi back in the day. Sully deploys the Veterans Trio for overtime, the trio share a look and a nod. Wes drops the puck, Lars wins the faceoff, passes back to Kris. ''Darling!'' Kris passes to Erik, who fires the puck past Woll's ear to end the game. ''That's how we do it, darling!'' Kris says, wrapping his arms around Erik. Erik kisses Kris, and hugs Lars. ''Thank you both for the assists.''

After media, Kris goes to Kyle and Lars with his idea, explaining. ''Rusty is kind of by himself for leading the forwards, I think having Lars promoted would help him. Rusty and Erik approve of this, by the way.''

Kyle nods, and fires a text off to Tags. ''I like how you three think, consider it done. Lars, are you good with this?''

Lars nods, he helped Ovi in Washington, so he's used to leading teams. ''I'm honoured, can't wait to get started.''

The A goes on his away jersey for their final roadtrip game against Winnipeg. Which is a dominant win, 5-0 with a shutout for Ned. Then, they fly home to Pittsburgh for their four days off before a shorter homestay. On the plane, during a card game with Erik, Lars, and Marcus, Kris gets a call from Sid. ''Salut, mon frere, what's up?'' He asks.

Sid says. ''Not much, Geno and I are just out of the office, and heading home. Friedman wants to interview you and Erik.'' Oh, does he now? Kris puts the call to speaker, this concerns them both now. ''What's the interview about?''

Sid sighs, and explains. ''The same shit Geno and I used to get interviewed about, being a married couple leading an NHL team.'' Both of them roll their eyes, this was why they didn't wanna tell anyone about them until 2023, they wanted to escape the media frenzy. ''Can we turn the interview down?'' Erik asks.

Sid says. ''Yes, you can, or I can on your behalf as Advisor to The GM.'' Erik looks to Kris, gets the nod, and says. ''Can you tell him no interview, please, Sid?''

Sid hums, and says. ''Thought you'd say that. Will do. See you at Cranberry.''

Kris says. ''See you soon, Sid.'' He hangs up, and puts his phone away, Kris rolls his eyes, the last thing he needs right now is more dumb media. The team's press pack is more than enough. He also refuses to subject Erik to it, they've come this far without the media, and they'll be just fine keeping their home life private. Erik deserves better than that. ''You good, Kris?'' Jack asks him from the table across the aisle. Kris sighs, and says. ''Erik and I have been together for almost fifteen years, now all of a sudden the media gives a shit?'' Erik says, shuffling the deck again. ''They don't, sweetheart, they just want a story, and we're not giving it to them.''

Bunting says. ''God, fifteen years? Most of us haven't even been in the league for that long!''

Drew asks them. ''How the hell have you two kept this up? Like, Sid and Geno we get, same team and stuff. But, the long distance stuff?'' Kris says, turning his wedding ring on his finger. ''When you love someone that much, OC, you make it work, even if it gets difficult, because it's worth it.''

Erik nods, and adds. ''For us, we were born for each other, we are each other's first real everything. First love, first kisses, all of it.'' Raks seems curious at Erik's use of kisses in the plural form. ''First kisses? Plural, Karl?''

Erik counts on his fingers. ''Our proper first kiss was when we got together in 2011, our second first kiss was when we got back together in 2019, and our third first kiss was at our wedding in 2021.'' Kris nods, smiling with nostalgia, the plane falls back into that comfortable quiet. They're almost home.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The early stretch moves along well for the team, they're second in the Metro division by late November. Just three points off the Rangers, same teams topping the division, just a different season. They've got their first stage of the infamous Battle of Pennsylvania in a couple of days. For Kris, this is the biggest moment of his captaincy so far. He's mostly taken everything in stride, but games against the Flyers are always more important than any other game he plays. But, for right now, it's a rest day, and Kris and Erik have Johnny and Jack over watching some Premier League highlights. Rusty and Drew are spending the day with Sid and Geno. The team elected Marcus to be Kris' backup for the PA, and Kris is currently going over some stuff discussed in their last meeting. ''Erik, are you going to Italy for the Olympics?'' Kris asks.

Erik shrugs. ''No idea, that'll be our anniversary fortnight.'' Johnny says to his surrogate step-dad. ''If Team Sweden don't pick you, they're idiots.''

Erik laughs, he's not known Marino long, but he already likes the kid. ''Glad you think so, Johnny.''

Jack adds, looking to Kris. ''If Team Canada don't pick you, they're crazy.''

Kris gives his younger boy a small smile. ''Thank you for saying so, Ivy.''

The Battle of Pennsylvania game comes all too quickly for Kris' liking. He's oddly nervous for tonight, they're hosting, six points up on the Flyers, and Rusty is lighting up the score sheets lately. But, these games always mean more to him than any other. With both Sid and Claude gone from the rivalry, it's not going to be what it once was, but, that hatred between the two teams will probably never die. He and Erik turn up to the arena in their Pittsburgh suits, the same ones they wore to game seven against the Avalanche this past spring. Sid comes in to do the read after the team suit up. ''Okay, gents, up front: OC, Eller, and Rusty.'' Lars has been bumped up for what they're expecting to be a physical battle. ''On the blueline: The Twin Terrors.'' Erik and Kris share an excited look, they don't get to share the ice often, so this is going to be fun. ''In net: Jarry!''

The Penguins take to the ice, and get off to an amazing start, scoring four goals in the first period alone. Lars, Drew, Tito, and Ivy all getting them 4-0 up, and Jarry performing daylight robbery on Konecny and Hathaway more than once. ''Okay, boys, we're doing really well so far, but we've got 40 minutes of hockey left, so we stay alert.'' Kris addresses the room. Geno and Sid share an aside glance, they definitely made the right choice.

Philadelphia take over in the second period, Couturier netting a lucky goal early on for 4-1. Hathaway gets two a minute apart, seriously annoying the shit out of the very partisan Pittsburgh crowd. Late on in the period, Konecny gets a lucky breakaway for 4-4. There's a brief scrum when the third pair and fourth line are up for the final shift. ''Hey! Ivy! Seb! Fall back! Now!'' Kris orders the two younger defencemen. They both retreat, Kris and Erik go to calm things down. Strangely, Kris hasn't been in the box all that much this season. ''Kev, Blake, Cookie - enough.'' Erik says.

The third is even more of a battle of attrition. No goals until very late. Kris gets a goal to put the team up 5-4. Not to be outdone, Couturier nets his second of the game to tie it up again 5-5. On a rush in the dying minute of the game, Marino dekes out three Flyers, and scores the winner, ending the game at 7-5. ''Amazing effort tonight, boys, depth game, love to see it.'' Rusty says, and passes the helmet to Jarry. ''Let's not do that again, hard-earned two points, but let's not earn them like that again, please.'' This gets a big laugh from the room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The midpoint of the season arrives in no time, Erik learns that he won't be going to Italy for the Olympics in February. Neither will Kris. If Erik's honest with himself, he's more disappointed that Kris isn't going to the games than anything. Sid will be going for one last shot at gold, but he'll be the only one of the quartet going to Italy for hockey purposes. Geno will be going with him for support. However, it does give him and Kris their anniversary without work getting in the way, the only real annoying thing about having a January anniversary. Sully and Quinn hold an optional skate ahead of the last couple of weeks before Christmas. They've got a Central division roadtrip to St Louis, Minnesota, and Chicago to prepare for. They're still second in the division, and third in the conference, on top of being fifth in the whole league. ''Right, boys, nothing stressful today, we're just tightening things up for the midseason grind, we've got Vegas and Dallas coming into town this week, so we've gotta be ready.'' Quinn says.

They run some relays, do a mini skills competition, and Owen proposes a capture the flag game. Then, it's back to the dressing room. Kris asks everyone to stick around after showers and changing into casual clothes. ''What's up, captain?'' Tito asks.

Kris asks his team, it's still not entirely sunk in yet that he's the captain, and he's always vigilant about doing a good job with whatever time is left to him. ''I just wanna get the temperature in the room. How am I doing? Is there anything you all need from me?'' Noel says. ''Tanger, you're doing an amazing job, Sid chose you for a reason, right?''

Sebastian says, pushing his hoodie sleeves up. ''You've got us ticking like a clock, Tanger, we've had two fantastic captains in the last two seasons.''

Ned chimes in, putting a baseball cap on. ''One of the best captains I've played under, that's for sure.''

Sully speaks up, he's nursed all three of the trio through their various insecurities. Be it Sid's fears of not being tough enough on ice, Geno's grasp of English, Kris' worries about not being good enough at all, Flower's playoff yips, or Erik's late arrival. ''Kris, son, listen. We basically had three captains for the longest time, all three of you, Flower, and then Erik have all been captains in your own ways. We're incredibly lucky to still have you.''

Rusty asks his surrogate uncle. ''Is there anything you need from us, Kris?''

Kris nods, and says. ''Keep playing the way you are, help me keep this ship sailing, and help me keep my head quiet.'' He smiles, and adds a little request to Erik. ''And, darling, keep being the best husband on Earth.'' He can't do this without Erik, that's the simple truth of this new era of his life as a Penguin.

Erik beams at him, and kisses his cheek. ''I will, sweetheart, and you'll do the same.''

Kris nods, and kisses Erik on the lips gently. ''Always.''

They head for some lunch, Kris and Erik go over some tentative plans for their fifteenth anniversary. They're both free that fortnight, so they can theoretically do whatever they want with it. They spent their first, fifth, and eighth anniversaries at All Star Games. Their eleventh in San Jose. Their tenth apart, but planning their wedding. And, their last two at home. ''Where did we spend our third anniversary?'' Erik asks.

Kris thinks, he vaguely remembers spending that one in the fucking hospital after his first stroke. ''We had that late, over the summer break in Montreal. I was in hospital for our actual anniversary.'' Geno swans in, suited up from a meeting with Jason. ''What's going on?'' Erik says to Geno. ''Well, we had training, a team meeting, and now we're trying to plan our anniversary.''

Geno proposes. ''Fifteen, yeah? How about a big team party?'' Kris' eyes blow wide. ''No, no thanks, G. Besides, you and Sid are gonna be in Italy, you'd miss it.''

Erik finally has a revelation, the most obvious ideas seem to always come last for some dumb reason. ''How about we go to Sweden, just us, and stay at our place there for the two weeks?'' Kris takes Erik's hand over the table. ''I'd love that, amour, just to get out of here for a bit.''

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The team come out of the Christmas break strong, with four wins in a row against: Carolina, Columbus, San Jose, and Utah. The run only hampered a bit by two losses back to back against Vancouver and Edmonton. In all, January goes really well for the Penguins under what's now being called 'Le Nouveau Regime' in the media. Olympic break comes altogether too quickly, and five of the team will be going to Italy. Jarry and Sid for Canada and the US, Rusty for the US, Ricky for Sweden, and Lars will be captaining Denmark. Kris and Erik are packed up for their trip to Vetlanda for their anniversary. Kris is excited for this trip, even if it's just for two weeks, he's been longing to get back to their happy place, and get out of the constant fishbowl of North America for a bit. They leave the morning after their overtime win against Buffalo. Flying privately to Sweden together.

It takes them a couple of days to rest off the jet lag, but, they decide to take it easy for the short time they're here. It's funny how so many of their memories trace back to this small town in Sweden, Erik muses while they're getting dinner ready one night. Their first major holiday together in 2012, they spent the lockout here as well, that summer after they got back together, and their wedding. ''You good, amour?'' Kris asks.

Erik nods, and says. ''Yeah, hjartat, I was just thinking of how many of our big milestones have happened here, that's all.''

They sit down with dinner, Kris says. ''Yeah, it's kind of crazy, isn't it?'' Kris admits to his husband. ''I'm surprised at how much I've come to love this country.''

Erik chuckles, sometimes it does slip them by that they've also married two whole countries to each other, just as Sid and Geno did with Canada and Russia. ''Same for Montreal, whenever we go there, it's like coming home.''

On the day of their anniversary, it's far too cold for the picnic dinner they had been planning, it snowed through the night. So, thinking on their feet, they dress warm for a walk in the snow. The town is dead quiet today, nobody is out and about, it's almost like the whole place has been abandoned overnight. ''What the hell?'' Kris asks as they walk down the street arm in arm. ''I think Sweden play Slovakia today, hjartat.'' Kris nods, he almost forgot that the Olympics started today, to wrapped up in this little getaway with Erik to care. ''Oh, that makes sense, amour, yeah.'' Some might say the way they get lost in each other might be more than a tad unhealthy, but they've never given a damn about it. If anyone has an issue with that, they can take it up with Bettman for sending them to that 2011 All Star Game. ''Hope they win, I'd like to see Sweden get a medal.'' Erik says, dusting off his red coat.

Kris says, adjusting his scarf, the gold one. ''A Canada-Sweden gold medal match would be great. Even if we're not going to be in it.'' The snow comes back in, and they get going home to get warm. That night, they have dinner by the fire, and exchange gifts. They seem of the same mind, since they both commissioned artists to paint them from the 2011 All Star Game to their Cup win together. ''Happy anniversary, mon amour.'' Kris leans over to kiss his husband. Erik kisses back with equal passion. ''Happy anniversary, hjartat mitt.'' Fifteen years, there were times they never dared to imagine they'd be here, but here they are. Partners, best friends, soulmates, Captain and Alternate.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A big game comes in the third week of March, the biggest game of Kris' captaincy so far. A game against Vancouver in Rogers Arena that could potentially see them clinch a playoff spot if they win either way, or lose in overtime or a shootout. The team get in, get ready, and suit up together. Sully gives the read for the top unit, and they get out for warmups. Then, opening faceoff. Glass stares down the gun of Calder winner Elias Pettersson. Drew is matched up with Jake DeBrusk, and Rusty against Daniel Sprong. Staring Kris down is his fellow captain, Quinn Hughes. The DPS line has been tearing the west up for two seasons now. Cody wins the drop, and it's off to the races for the Penguins. Pettersson gets the Canucks up early 1-0, and that's the only goal for the next fifteen minutes. ''Hughes and Hronek are fucking deadly together.'' Erik observes, coming back from a shift out of breath.

Kris nods, downing some water. ''I know, it's like looking in a mirror too.'' He's never seen someone who reminds him more of himself. The third unit are up, and Tito scores a tying goal in the dying minute of the period against his old team. ''Good work, Tito.'' Kris says once they're back in the room for first intermission. Anthony is panting, leaning his head back in his stall. ''Thanks, captain.''

The second period is all Vancouver, the west's best team have one hand on the President's Trophy. Boeser turns on the jets to outskate both Kris and Erik to put his team up 2-1, and Nils Hoglander follows up with another goal from the circle for 3-1. Kris judges a puck battle between Myers and Marcus to steal the puck, and run off with it, he goes five hole on Demko, and salvages the scoreline to 3-2. They're gonna need at least two more goals to clinch their playoff spot. ''Alright, boys, we're holding on well, no panic mode yet, okay? We need at least two more goals to get this done. Tanger, any words?'' Sully addresses the room during second intermission.

Kris nods, fixing his newly short hair, he and Erik both got haircuts in Sweden. ''We stay calm, and we stay together.''

They come out for third period, and there's no scoring until halfway in, Owen reads a play quickly, and passes to Ricky, who fires a wrist shot past Demko's head to tie the game 3-3. ''Good job, boys, keep it up!'' Kris says as the second line come off their shift. The back half of the period goes scoreless, so into overtime they go. Sully gives the read for overtime. ''Up front: Glass and Bunting. Back end: St.Ivany. Deploying the kids.''

They get out for the five minute overtime period, Glass wins the drop against probable Hart Winner JT Miller, and passes back to Jack. Ivy winds up, and takes the shot. It goes in. They're back in the playoffs. They'll not be celebrating this, that's never went well in the past. ''Well done boys. Huge win, very happy with that. We're in the playoffs again, still loads of work left to do.'' Jack gets the helmet, and says. ''Never once dreamed of scoring a goal like that, thanks for the pass, Cody. Uhm, let's keep this going!'' Kris applauds his youngest, Jack has been the shy one of the d-corps all season, and he's happy that he's coming out of his shell a bit. ''Boys, captain's word of advice, we've got an 8AM flight home tomorrow, I want us all rested, no funny stuff tonight.'' Kris says, stepping right into captain-mode. He wants his troops rested for the final stretch, just because they've made it now, doesn't mean these last games don't matter.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Their first round opponent in the playoffs ends up being the Devils. The division's wildcard. They get rid of them pretty quickly, in just five games. Kris' first ever playoff wins as captain. They've got a couple of days off between the rounds, Sid and Geno come over for lunch. It's either going to be the Rangers or the Flyers next. That series is definitely going seven, and has been every bit as physical as it was billed as. The quartet have lunch in the living room, watching back some highlights of the Rangers-Flyers series. Seems as though there was a massive line brawl in game two during period one. ''Well... I'd say I didn't expect that, but... I'd be lying to my family.'' Sid says, looking shellshocked. Geno nurses some coffee in his hand. ''Hope they tire each other out, actually.''

Kris laughs, fiddling with his wedding ring. ''Same, makes my job easier to lead our team against a tired team.'' They watch as another fight breaks out in the third period of game two. This time between Konecny and Trouba. ''What did Captain Elbows do this time?'' Erik asks, returning from the kitchen.

Geno says. ''Trouba elbowed Hathaway, and TK got angry at him.'' Sid says to Geno, cringing from the armchair. ''What's it the kids say, honey? 'Fork found in kitchen?' Is that it?''

Geno shrugs. ''I dunno, solnishko.''

Kris nods, he's had to figure out more than his fair share of modern idioms these days. ''Yeah, that's the phrase, heard Ivy say it earlier this year, and had to ask what it meant.''

They switch to game three, which seems to be more civilized. The Flyers clawing back the 2-0 series deficit with a 3-1 win. Game four seemed to be a huge battle of attrition, the Flyers winning 1-0 in overtime. ''I don't think I've ever seen a more toxic playoff series in my life, mon coeur.'' Erik says.

Kris nods, whatever doubts he had about being captain here, he's a whole lot better than either Trouba or Couturier right now. ''I know, alskad, I'd never let this shit slide with us, or in Val D'Or back in the day.''

Sid gives his brother a shit eating grin, as though Kris has finally come to the conclusion Sid wanted him to six months ago. ''Good to see you've finally caught on to why I chose you, mon frere.'' Sid says, Kris smirks and rolls his eyes. ''Alright, no need to rub it in, mon frere.'' Geno nods in agreement with Kris. ''I know, Legend. Trouba is acting like a child, and Couturier is invisible.''

Erik leans up to kiss his husband's bearded cheek. ''Glad to be your Alt, and not theirs, sweetheart.''

Kris kisses Erik's temple. ''Glad to have you, darling.'' They watch up to game six which was last night as the Penguins eliminated the Devils. Game seven will be tomorrow night, and Kris can sense that it's going to be every bit as physical as the preceding six games have been.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They somehow use the fatigue the Rangers are playing on, and Trouba's suspension for elbowing Hathaway, to sweep the Rangers in the second round. Kris thinks that it kind of serves them right, the playoffs are no time or excuse for being assholes to other players. Like his coach in Val D'Or said: 'Play like idiots, lose like idiots.' He and Luc took that advice and ran with it, and it got Kris his first captaincy, and them both drafted into the NHL, even if Luc died well before his time. So now, the Penguins are waiting on the winner of the Boston-Toronto series, which will probably go six at minimum. Sully and Quinn have the boys in for a training scrimmage. Kris and Erik walk into the dressing room hand in hand, and see that they've been split up for scrimmage today. ''Uh, Sully... what's this for?'' Kris asks, pointing to his name under Team Black, and Erik's under Team White. Sully just chuckles, and says. ''Just a little experiment, captain, that's all.''

Rusty jokes. ''They're tryin' to stop you making out every time you score together.''

Erik says, lacing up his skates. ''Well, what if that's how we get the Wales? Have they considered that?''

Kris finishes suiting up for training, and kisses Erik before saying. ''We'll be fine, we've been together long enough, right?'' Erik nods, and follows Kris out to the ice. Team Black go up 6-5 after the first period and a half, before Lars ties it up for Team White in the last minute of the game. ''Alright, boys, good job. Let's run a shootout drill. Then, break up for lunch.'' Quinn says.

The teams are tied 7-7 in the shootout, next goal wins. Rusty goes up for Team Black. ''Go for it, Rusty!'' Drew shouts from the bench. Rusty gets the puck on his stick, facing down against Ned, he dangles, and sneaks it through to win the shootout 8-7. ''Good job, Rusty. Shower up and grab some lunch, boys!'' Sully orders the troops.

The team shower up, change, and grab lunch together. Eminently aware of what's to come ahead of them soon. But, they're the defending champions for a reason, right?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Toronto get the better of them in seven closely fought games, and will face the Canucks for the Stanley Cup. The Canucks mowed through Dallas in four to reach the final. Kris is proud of himself for leading these guys this far in his first season as captain. Le Nouveau Regime held up incredibly well this season, despite the media's doubts about having him as captain with three alternates. Toronto were simply too good to be beaten in that game seven, Kris and Erik are happy to have the extra resting time at any rate. The team decide to stick around to watch the cup final. Vancouver are already 2-0 up in the series on both of their home games. The DPS, Lotto, and Life Lines are working like a clock against Toronto's weakened defence. ''God, Demko is a force of nature.'' Jarry says as they watch the Canucks dominate game three in Toronto.

Ned nods in agreement, he says. ''If he doesn't win the Vezina, I'll be pissed off. He and Silovs deserve the Jennings too.''

Erik adds. ''Miller should definitely get the Hart and the Conn Smythe.''

The team are somewhat divided on who they're rooting for. Jarry is backing Vancouver because he's from there, Ned is right there with him for goalie solidarity. Erik is also backing the Canucks, reasoning to Kris last night. ''There's still a part of me that's a Senators Captain.'' Kris can't argue with that, he does find it funny how morally opposed to backing the Leafs his husband is though. ''Who are you backing, captain?'' Tito asks, wearing one of his old Canucks hoodies, supporting his friends.

Kris says, that's easy. ''Vancouver, always Vancouver.'' Erik puts a loving hand on his thigh as Rusty - backing the Leafs - asks. ''Why's that?''

Kris just sniffles, and says. ''For Luc, he was a Canuck.'' He points to one of his earliest tattoos, Luc's name and the guitar. The Canucks do go onto win game three, 4-1. He wonders how Sid and Geno's trip to Magnitogorsk is going, they'll have landed yesterday. It's been weird, not having them on the ice anymore. But, the three of them are bound for life regardless, and Kris is so proud that they trusted him enough to make him captain. He has no idea how much longer he's got left, he does want to retire with Erik, he does know that much.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Canucks do go on to win the whole thing in five games, their first ever Stanley Cup. Kris and Erik use their first day in Montreal to go deliver the news to Luc about the team that drafted him. As well as the news of Le Nouveau Regime. They'd have loved to come back here with the cup as they did last summer, but they're both incredibly proud of the Canucks. ''Luc, you'll never believe it, but your guys did it!'' Erik says, and adds. ''And, your best friend is our new captain in Pittsburgh too!'' Kris laughs, these visits never get any easier, he's been without Luc longer than he knew him. That stupid fucking motorbike. But, doing this every year with the man he loves makes it feel lighter if not better. ''Sid trusted me with it, and I think I'm doing okay at it.''

Erik says. ''He's doing an amazing job, take it from his husband.'' Kris also says. ''Sid won his third Olympic gold medal too. While we were in Sweden for our anniversary.''

After their visit, they head home. Ready for a few weeks to be Kris and Erik, the married men. Ready to shed Letang and Karlsson, the captain and his alternate, until training camp. Sid and Geno said that's the most important part of being a leadership couple. Kris and Erik have been doing it for fifteen years, and that part does get easier. Somehow, they've found sanctuary in each other.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Okay, really pleased with this one! Been going through a bit of a burnout on top of a bout of insomnia, so this took ages to get done. Kinda wanted to explore a hypothetical season where Sid and Geno retire together. In real life, all three of the core will retire together. But, here, Kris stays in the league. Mostly because he wants to play alongside his husband for as long as he's able to. So, I felt as though Kris would be the captain in the case of Sid and Geno both retiring at the same time. All of the guys say he's basically the brain and conscience of the whole team, and holds the whole thing together. So, he'd be a natural pick for the job in this scenario.

Been really nervous about this fic, but I got it done! Please, nobody take this fic as an insult to Sid and Geno, I love them to bits! Just wanted to explore something.

Enjoy!

Also: 800th post!

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

What do you think of the character designs for the historical heroes in fate? Do you like them? Hate them? Don't care?

I'm the fate/strange fake anon, btw, and I read your fate fic so I wanted to know what you thought of the fate version of Enkidu.

I thought it was very good and would've loved hearing your thoughts on the episode, but I understand if you choose not to watch it. The fate franchise is... something

I'm sorry I can't promise to watch it, anon, but Fate Apocrypha burned me so hard I just can't do it again. Maybe times will change but until then...

Now, to your question.

I think they're hilariously awful. No, really, they usually just make me laugh.

Fate/Zero makes it work in part because they bring it up explicitly in service to the story.

Artoria's being misidentified as a man in history and having to fulfil a man's role is a central part of the show (where in what I've seen in the other Fates... it's sort of brought up but mostly so that Shirou bangs a woman). Alexander the Great's appearance being wildly different than what is known brings up how legends drift from reality/what little is known about the past and allows him to be neatly characterized as "Sort of Alexander but Not Really, Just Roll with it Viewer" in a way that services the plot. Jeann D'Arc looks exceedingly like Artoria so we get that whole subplot and the fuel for our caster character.

The point being, even though many of the designs originated elsewhere in other parts of the franchise, they work in service to the story in Fate/Zero and make sense.

Everything else I've seen they're bad, just bad, in every respect.

First you have the fact that we get a lot of same-face in the Fate universe. There are characters who look exactly like one another and, not coincidentally, tend to have the same tropes/archetypes associated with them. You get sabre-face, berserker-face, caster-face, the list goes on and while there are artistic tropes and styles associated with kinds of characters they should look distinct.

Then they just often go off the walls with little to no explanation. Hans Christian Andersen, you know that guy who was a real person, yeah, he's now a blue-haired toddler who looks like he escaped from a toy store.

Half the characters are now women, which would be nice for gender diversity, except that they seem to be a different gender for sexy purposes.

Achilles? He's this guy who's oddly skinny looking and uh... not a Greek warrior.

And let's not talk about Nero, shall we?

Now, to Enkidu. I'll admit that one first had me doing a double take and going "ah, another Fate character design". And "not how I pictured Enkidu :/". However, I then heard that his appearance takes after the whore, and that he is some eldritch terrifying beast in truth, and that is a good explanation for me and also nice in that he still retains this strange otherworldly beauty and a face he's stolen from someone else.

[laaffogato]

Joseph X Afab Sub Reader 🍋

Requested!

☁︎Warnings: Smut, Dirty talk, Fluff

☁︎Story type: One shot

☁︎Anime/Video Game: Identity V

☁︎Characters: Joseph (The Photographer)

☁︎Words: 1,386

☁︎AN: This Is a Request Tysm for reading!!!!

☁︎Summary: As you wait in Joseph's office you can't help but to imagine how Joseph would look after his fencing practice. Just the thought of him bending you over the desk in front all sweaty makes you feel something deep within.

"Ms. (L/N) will that be all? " The butler says as he pushes in your seat to Joseph's desk.

"Yes, that is all" you say as you sit up straight.

You were well known for being the daughter of a famous entrepreneur and also known as Joseph's lover. You decided to visit Joseph today as a way to congratulate him for his last fencing match.

“Alright then I shall take my leave Ms. (L/N)” The butler bowed and left the room.

You look around the room and your eyes focus on a calendar in the room you noticed that this day was the time that Joseph spent practicing fencing. As you were staring you didn’t notice that you were drifting off. You were daydreaming about how Joseph looks after his practice. You rarely see him after such a thing but when you do you can’t help but want him to bend you over the desk in front of you and take you.

You snapped out of your day dream when you heard the door behind you close and a soft gasp.

“My Love, what are you doing here?” Joseph asked as he walked towards you swiftly and elegantly while still in his sweaty fencing gear.

He looked handsome with his hair all ruffled up and disheveled from having his mask on and the seat on his forehead dribbling down towards his chin as he switched his sabre to his other hand to wipe it off with the back of his hand.

“I wanted to congratulate you on your match last week, I'm quite sorry I missed it dear” You said as you got up from your chair and walked closer to joseph.

You looked up at his face and saw that he was staring at your breast.

“No it's fine my love I assume that you’ll make it up to me?” Joseph asked as he grabbed your waist and pulled you closer to him.

He walked you backwards till your bottom hit the desk.

“In what way are you talking about Joseph?” You asked as you lifted your hand to cup his face.

“Lately I’ve been thinking about you, the way you move and talk gracefully in front of people at party's " Joseph whispered through as his hands slowly tightened around your waist.

“The way after such activities you offer to wrap your mouth around my cock and use that warm cunt of yours to comfort me throughout the night” He said through his teeth.

“I also love the way you scream my name throughout the night. How about I make you do that right now so I could hear that lovely melody?”

Before you could reply, Joseph swifty dove to the sweet spot on the side of your neck kissing and nipping at it.

“Oh Joseph” you moan as you grasp the back of his neck to pull him closer to you. His left hand was slowly removed from your waist and used to push the stuff on the desk behind you off of it onto the floor, whilst he was doing this he was using his right to guide you to lay down on the desk. His fingers sneaked under your dress skirt to rub your clit in a circle.

“Hm~ you're so wet. ” Joseph moaned in your ear as he bit your ear lobe.

he began to pull your panties down your legs.

You moaned softly as you spread your legs wider.

“Heh” Joseph chuckled quietly " Tell me what were you daydreaming about?” He asked as he stopped rubbing your clothes and instead started to tap it in a pattern.

"I was daydreaming about how hot you look after fencing practice" You said as you tried to push your hot cunt more towards his hand.

"Oh so desperate, does seeing me like this really get you this horny and desperate for me?" Joseph asked as he rubbed your clit in quick circles.

Joseph quickly pulled off your panties and started fingering you, you moaned loudly.

"God you're so tight I can't wait to put my dick in this tight pussy." Joseph started fingering you with another finger as he used his other hand to pinch and rub at your nipple.

Angling his fingers upwards he started to hit that spot that made you see stars. Your walls tighten around his fingers as your moans and whines begin to fill the room as he begins to move his fingers faster in you.

You saw white and blank spots as you cummed on his fingers, he slowly slipped his fingers out which made you whine at the loss.

It didn't take him long to undress you and stare at your cunt fluttering for something to fill it.

"Beautiful and all for me" He whispered as he quickly dove down and started lapping at your folds.

You reacted immediately and quickly grabbed at his hair and tugged at it gently mindful of how much he likes his hair, this only enticed him to suck and lick faster at your cunt. You let out a quiet moan at the feeling of him using his tongue to go in and out of your cunt, He then sucked onto your clit which made you come again.

“Oh my please be patient my dear” He quickly pulled down his pants and boxers.

His dick looked pretty, it was not too long and not too thin he quickly positioned himself at your entrance and pushed himself in.

“AH~” You and Joseph moaned together

He slowly thrust into you in a rhythm and the pain quickly turns to pleasure and he starts to speed up his thrusting as a light groan passes through his lips.

“Ah Oh~” You moan in pleasure as you run your fingers through his hair.

His hand quickly grabs onto both of your hands and pinned them on the desk and tightly grabs your hip with a bruise inducing grip with his other hand.

"Come on princess sing louder for me" Joseph said as he thrusted into you harder.

You moaned louder with each thrust of his going in and out of your cunt your juices covering his cock as smacking and wet sounds sounded through the room.

Joseph slowed down his thrusts and flipped you over on the desk as your hands helped you hold yourself up.

Joseph grabbed onto your hair and pulled on it and he guided your hips back and forth roughly on his cock.

"Who do you belong to?" Joseph asked as his palm grasped your ass tightly and he slowed down and pulled out a little to grind on your g spot and pulled your hair more.

"I belong to you" you said as you desperately tried to get more from him.

"I couldn't hear you love what did you say? " he asked as he started to thrust again slowly

"You I belong to you and only you no one else" you half scream as Joseph smacks your ass leaving a red mark on it.

"You're right me your mine no one else's" Joseph says as he starts to thrust into you again.

Both your moans and Joseph's groans were heard in the room as his thrust began to grow sloppy, he slammed into you a few more times before spilling in cum inside of you.

Joseph pulled out of you slowly to watch as his cum flowed out of you.

Joseph gave you a light kiss on your back and left you on the desk for a moment to put on some pants and get you a fresh dress shirt out of one of his drawers in the desk. He gently put it on you and carried you to his bedroom.

When the both of you got to Joseph's room there was already a bowl of warm water and a fresh towel set next to it.

"Was I too harsh?" Joseph asked as he rang the towel out and started to clean your cunt from his cum.

You twitch a little from the little stimulation the towel gave you.

"You were just fine, my love." You said as you pulled him closer to you to give him a kiss.

"I love you very much Joseph" you said as you kissed him again.

"And I you the light of my life."

[silvertws]

Mh yes, I could have been obsessed over I don't know... mythology, dinosaurs, maybe some more known media like Percy Jackson.

But no.

I got obsessed, over Minecraft steves.

You've read that right.

FUCKING MINECRAFT STEVES.

CURSE YOU YOUTUBE FOR YOU PAGE.

I could have been watching maybe good quality Rps.

But no.

One video, and I was already hooked.

Goddamn it.

You know how many different series I've watched up until now?

Let me show you.

First video was episode 118 of "The Legends of the Balancers" back when it just came out, then I kept watching from there and after I finished that I decided to watch it from the start.

And you may think "surely 100+ episodes of a Minecraft Steve saga satisfied their needs" right...?

WRONG.

I.kept.going.

Bedrock Rising, Ruined Reality, Steve Saga (no, not Sabre's one, I tried that one but uh... I couldn't bring myself to enjoy it, I do love his newest series tho!), Ore Quest prime, A dark soul, Crimson Life Origins, and AT LEAST another one that I can't remember the name of- ToT it even was a log one I'm pretty sure. AHHHHHH

Oh and yes.

This all happened in less than a month.

I have a problem.

But it's fine :}

THIS IS MAKING ME WANT TO MAKE A FANON OC- WHY- WHY DO I EVEN HAVE A STORYLINE IN MIND- WHY AM I LIKE THIS.

AND. I STILL DON'T KNOW HOW TO DRAW THEM MFS-

LIKE WHAT.

like sure, I have head canons, I have made some sketches, BUT HOW.

Like, take FUCKING TIME STEVE-

IS IT A MASK? IS IT A FLOATING CLOCK HEAD? IS IT A CLOCK FUSED WITH HIS FACE?

I don't know.

It just exist.

oh and let's talk about THE FACT THAT THEY ALL WEAR THE SAME FUCKING SHIT-

MY MANS, I AM HORRIBLE AT DESIGNING OUTFITS, GIVE ME SOMETHING TO WORK WITH PLEASE.

I am going insane.

I am now attached to all of these characters.

Yes.

All of them.

I cannot help myself.

I have low standards I know, I'm well aware-

Anyway.

Someone should really make a Bingo for those series like:

"Naive AF mc, Darkness Go brr, Fought a God, Got mind controlled, has multiple people in their head, is in the WRONG DIMENSION, uses a crystal of some sort, L i g h t, music is loud AF and I cannot hear what you're saying, puberty hit during the series so the voice just changed, Sabre (which, I can exuse cuz yk, it's Sabre), got created by an all powerful being, is supposedly very powerful but somehow loses pretty often ngl (sorry <3), amnesia..." and so.much.more.

Which isn't bad, cause they're all unique in their own way <3

I mostly find that funny :3 they are all based off the same thing after all, so it makes sense.

I swear I am a responsible and serious adult.

I just uh... Like funky stuff ig-

Don't come at me please :'}

I feel like you can see my road trip to madness here.

Don't worry, this happens everytime I hyperfixate on anything.

Well, anything that I can't really talk about with any of my friends because they don't know and I don't want to bother them because if I start talking about the lore...

I won't stop.

You will have to stop me, knock me out or something.

I know my friend will read this, so *hi* :}

[majesticartax]

i was tagged by @suddenrundown like a million years ago and i'm sorry i'm just getting to it now!! thank you for tagging me!

Star Sign(s): *googles "how to find all your signs* sun: leo, moon: virgo, ascendant/rising: pisces. what any of that means, i'm not too sure. i was also born in the year of the tiger if that's anything.

Favorite Holidays: halloween

Last Meal: seared sesame tuna and roasted eggplant

Current Favorite Musician: uhhh i legit do not know.

Last Music Listened To: Dragonforce - The Power of the Sabre Blade, because i was playing beat saber lol that song fucks.

Last Movie Watched: i caught the last half of the Joker and sort of paid attention to it today. but the last movie that i WATCHED watched was, coincidentally, Beau is Afraid, directed by Ari Aster. stellar. 9/10. highly recommend if you want to feel bad for 3 hours.

Last TV Show Watched: Jujutsu Kaisen

Last Book/Fic Finished: Night Film by Marisha Pessl

Last Book/Fic Abandoned: The Troop by Nick Cutter (but i'm coming back to it some day!)

Currently Reading: just gay manga

Last Thing Researched for Art/Writing/Hyperfixation: circadian mediation of dopamine activity in the vental tegmental area of the brain (for Deadly)

Favorite Online Fandom Memory: omg everything blends together... i don't know, really. but whenever i get a long comment on one of my fics, that always sticks with me. even if i can't respond to it because i can't find the words in the moment, please know you've reached me and touched me deeply <3

Favorite Old Fandom You Wish Would Drag You Back In/Have A Resurgence: i don't really have this? i only started really engaging in fandom like 8 years ago, and i'm still immersed in the haikyuu/kghn fandom (even if i sort of fell off a bit in the last couple years, i never REALLY left. i've just been in the shadows)

Favorite Thing You Enjoy That Never Had an Active or Big "Fandom" but You Wish It Did: i think all of the things that i enjoy that i could wish had a fandom already have a fandom. did that make a bit of sense? there are things i like to enjoy just for myself and i intentionally avoid the fandom... i can't answer this lol

Tempting Project You're Trying to Rein In/Don't Have Time For: a/b/o and somnophilia kghn fics!

mmkay, i will tag @sagechan, @snikkeler, @majoringinsarcasm, @majikhara

[seedlessmuffins]

Hi! I have hockey questions, actually. So, I went to school in Western New York, which was the first place I experienced hockey as like a popular sport, and the team everyone was for was the Buffalo Sabres. A friend of mine actually is a huge fan and writes a lot of sports history papers and articles about them, so I know some of their history and it’s fascinating! But I’m also from Ohio and we have our own NHL team apparently. So what’re your opinions on the Sabres and the Columbus Blue Jackets? Just out of curious or y and because I know basically nothing about the sport 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

eleanor! hi! thank you for the question!

buffalo is a great team to be a fan of imo, they are very similar to my fav team in that they have struggled a bit in the last few years however with young talents such as tage thompson (center), rasmus dahlin (defenseman) and owen power (defenseman), they are slated to climb the standings and become a more competitive team this year. they also play interesting hockey, and though i don't follow them, whenever i watch their games i have a good time! they are fast, explosive, and score lots of goals which means they're a pleasure to watch. and they're one of the teams in the nhl i'm not necessarily a fan of, but im not against them! fairly neutral. their jerseys are pretty cool as well, i do love the blue/yellow/white colour combo. also if your friend writes articles for them, then that's great! honestly that's the best if you're looking for resources on the team. if you want to look more into them, there is this podcast, that does daily recaps of the team explaining things (although i must admit, while listening to it, it isn't the most beginner friendly), this website is the official nhl sabres website which will have the most reliable news and such, and if you're looking for sabres at a glance, this twitter account was helpful to me!

in terms of the columbus blue jackets, i have to say i don't really like their team that much and they aren't very good. they have a few good talents such as johnny gaudreau (winger) and adam fantilli (center), however the rest of their team isn't great players and they probably won't do well this year. i also just don't like them as a team sorry, so i can't say too many nice things about them because i don't know a lot! if you do end up wanting to support this team, lmk and i can do some more in depth research for you. same with the sabres actually, if you want more info just hmu!!

as always, if you want links to watch reply to this post here, and if you want more general information about hockey as a sport, you can check out this post here as well as my intro to hockey for football fans here (or check out my series #k the hockey prof??? for all my intro to hockey business!)

it's hockey season! ask me questions!

[elitehoe]

Forbidden Door Predictions

ZERO HOUR

Athena vs Billie Starkz. I wish Athena a very happy murder.

Mogul Embassy vs CHAOS and El Desperado. If Despy on the card I'm always rooting for him.

El Phantasmo vs Stu Grayson. Someone's getting their nips twisted tonight, let's fucking go ELP.

United Empire vs LIJ. These are currently my favorite factions in nooj so really either winner is perfect for me.

MAIN SHOW

CM Punk vs Satoshi Kojima. Punk is obviously winning, but it's gonna be a fun match.

Hiroshi Tanahashi vs MJF. I'm so sorry Maxie but I have a strict root for Tanahashi policy that I can't stray from.

Le Suzuki Gods vs Sting, Darby Allin and Tetsuya Naito. I hope Naito obliterates Jericho but I also wish Misu a happy murder as well.

Toni Storm vs Willow Nightingale. I'm just rooting for women, BUT if Saraya touches Willow I'm not rooting for all women.

Sanada vs Jungle Boy. This is gonna be an underrated banger of a match, Sanada retains tho naturally.

Orange Cassidy vs Zack Sabre Jr vs Katsuyori Shibata vs Daniel Garcia. OC getting slutted out in this match, I'm here for the fucking honestly.

Blackpool Combat Club vs The Elite. I'm always the winner when these men fight and then you add Eddie and Ishii which I hope they wreck Claudio personally.

Kenny Omega vs Will Ospreay. I feel like Will should win it back in the Dome as a final passing of the torch, but if it happens tonight I'll definitely cry about it.

Bryan Danielson vs Kazuchika Okada. I hope Okada is the world's biggest bitch and Kaito Kiyomiya's Bryan tonight, I'm rooting for my goat big Kazu.

[leopoldainter]

We know bout rain cl9uds butb9majna

It's askingbvsomeoje over to check 5he time

She's saying she hears it

9vyors doin turn inserts properly or misei9n feels whoa no phlash

That's glovely my eyes could do what hers just did if I had only g0nevwith faster Southington calcium now available at webinareas pharmacy

But that's today

It's pike

52 moa feature of high quality tunnelsm8tgung

Seems quill coinsadentuak uoublmow like how ms. Magic used a drawn dial pad to resurrection memorial tragedies

G is jot silent rather than not silent so it can redeem

Stencil my delight well can't you tell how sorry i must feel be strewn by some hellpl3ss 14 and sokmebuhliev me

How's your day it's my left idiot

Do I let you know i am waiting leaned open na

Na northinglike that I was once I'm Seville city some old mill people might but

We ssbredancw yey wl3xcimuwe me ms harris before you spit anything on the new snewkers can you explain TYIS border? Maybe a little. Just try.

Obviously its they used the song Sabre Dance in the barber scene from bugs yeah bugs remember I thought you were told we weren't to be seen together and then Fudds like lever almighty ride

I don't think that's anybodys belly hahaha

Egerywj34s

Its just the flash fonts yes for justice

Seems turfrp logo hey som3one says hey I'mam i? watching something overhear look how good I

Withoutbstarssrs

Your games rubber vermouth

Gil grades ted

Whose whistling

Please hold: who the fuck is Travis

I'm Trevor boris

Did you get my degree

Did we need to bring our degrees

Where are we going!

Why is boomer here

Wll every now and then peace is celebrated through a dynamite tweet.

LshhhkHksh im darth vader

No now we have to get our degrees and bring them back to studio

Why

I got the red one

Play pussycat dolls no YES

[imjustemo4genoyall]

I mean do we really think in early November the 20 teams with identical winning records can keep it up the whole year? The Pens can't go on a long losing streak either. Things can change in a snap in a NHL season with injuries and trades and coaching changes, so even if when my team is on top of the league I'd stay quiet because it can happen to us. Sabres fans trolling us need to stay quiet because there's a whole season left and we'll see how real they are with 11 out of their next 15 on road

Hi 👋 Sorry, yesterday was a pretty stacked day for me. This is really the best way to look at the situation though and I really do try to think about it like that 'cause you're right, those winning records aren't really sustained throughout the whole year just like any losing slumps we go through don't last the whole year and both of those can and most likely will change at the drop of a hat. The plus side for me personally is I usually don't have to deal with other teams fans bs since I don't have any other social media accounts except for this account and Facebook so I never really come across any of that, and I don't deal with it irl because, as much as the Bolts would like you to believe, central Florida isn't exactly Hockey Town lol For me personally, my anxiety is centered around the thought of the Pens having to climb back up in the standings. I'm gonna love these Flightless Fucks, win or lose, always but the lower they get in the standings the harder it is to climb back up and the anxiety for me over it makes my chest cave in lol