#scratch that i already am

[silver-horse]

moving into the elfsong tavern is hilarious because of the type of folks who decided to hang out at camp. Now the aasimar with angel wings and her resurrected girlfriend are looking at a devil with leathery wings at the other end of the room. That poor very scared cat Grub has to be in the same room with not only an owlbear but also a dog. There is a skeleton man in one corner and three of his undead vessels are standing around with their dicks out because I wanted their clothes and underwear for myself. If any maids are told to bring food, they probably rush to the exploding wizard and the vampire who are sleeping in the same corner. The woman who is on fire is sleeping nearby, but it's still the most normal location in the room.

[sparkoflena]

The problem with being a fan of both Gambit and Tim Drake is that their respective comic companies have no idea what they're doing with my favorite characters.

Gambit has "LOOK, A MYSTERY! How does he know legit everyone? This information is a surprise tool that will help us later!" except they never ever reveal what the mystery is because they don't know either. Which has basically been happening since his origin in the 90s.

Tim Drake hasn't had a unique storyline since 2009 with Red Robin (yes, I count the 2022 Tim Drake Robin because they backtrack him into Robin). In the Red Robin comic series, they establish that Red Robin is essentially punishment for him, Tim's only really been special for his role as Robin, and this is a transition period to get him elsewhere. And then they just NEVER gave him anything else. He's STILL Red Robin. Sometimes he's back to Robin and sharing the mantle with Damian, which is WORSE.

Writers, I love my characters. Please stop backtracking their character development IN THEIR OWN COMIC RUNS.

[sysig]

Simon Petrikov is a service top and you can fight me about it (Patreon)

[mr-rdark]

A redraw of the newdad Madra cover but Doc Scratch cause it looked cool

[screwpinecaprice]

I really don't have time to be bummed out right now so I made them a little sad instead.

[timetravellingkitty]

so elections are starting tomorrow and I've lost all hope yall sorry gang but it's gonna get so much worse here it's like watching the titanic sink while those orchestra people are playing music

[keeps-ache]

blood of the covenant

[birdchildsnest]

I post and reblog a lot of stuff about DC canon, canon vs. fanon representations, etc. But I want to reiterate (as I probably will periodically) that you are allowed to do things "wrong" in your own fan works. You are allowed to have weird headcanons, self-indulgent projections onto certain characters, and just absolutely bizarre "he would never say that" scenarios. Fandom is by nature about a personal, emotional connection to the source material. And every fan's connection to that material is going to be different. Don't jump down people's throats when they don't share your headcanons, of course. (And try not to blindly insist that you know something when you haven't read the actual comics.) But please feel free to love what you love in the ways that bring you the most joy.

[coffeeandstrawberries]

In replies to my post a couple of people have expressed the opinion that Erik didn't care about Wille going through rough initiation/saw it as a necessary experience for his brother.

@raincitygirl76: "Erik wasn’t worried about Wilhelm’s upcoming initiation in 1.01 because Erik got initiated as a first year himself, and it was probably nearly as or just as brutal as the initiation he subjected August, Nils, Vincent etc to. It’s Wilhelm’s turn to suffer. In a few years it’ll be his turn to inflict the suffering. So Erik isn’t worried about Wilhelm.

That’s how hazing perpetuates itself. Most people who went through it and survived convince themselves it wasn’t as bad as they remember. So they pack their own kids (or in this case their kid brother) off to the place where they got hazed, and they don’t see it as a problem.

Erik would be considered a lousy Forest Ridge graduate if he gave his little brother a heads up beforehand that it would be brutal. Or if Erik asked August to go easy on Wilhelm. Erik doing so would imply to the current third years that Erik thinks Wilhelm is weak. If he cant get through the typical initiation unlike all the other boys, is Wilhelm even worthy of belonging to Forest Ridge?

So no, Erik would neither warn Wilhelm nor intervene with August."

I see how it could work in real life but it doesn't work for a piece of media. Because it is the opposite of good storytelling. Good storytelling means introducing important themes in the beginning, not two episodes before a series finale. Good storytelling means including hints and clues that start to make sense only after the reveals are made.

SA plotline turned out to be crucial for how conflicts in the show had been resolved. It was an important if not the main factor behind Wille's intention to renounce his title in the future. Therefore, SA plotline should have been treated as such since the very first episode.

If it was conceived as pivotal at the very beginning, we would see the signs of it.

For example:

Erik wouldn't look like a happy idiot while in Hillerska. Maybe he wouldn't have a talk with August or warn Wille, but we would see something was bothering him;

during the parents' weekend some of them could express their concern over initiation rituals back in their days;

the initiation August, Nils and Vincent went through should have been discussed — by them or by other senior students;

the warnings Hillerska supposedly got in the last decade would have been mentioned;

when Henry was talking about Hillerska's problem with applications or when the headmistress was insisting on August paying tuition, Hillerska's financial situation could have been connected to its toxic culture;

Sara's initiation was a great moment to give the audience a hint: yes, rituals of The Manor House are crazy, but they are nothing in comparison to the Forest Ridge ones.

None of that was done. A crucial plotline has been consistently treated as backdrop to the main plot. Why?

I don't follow interviews of the cast and creators, but my understanding is that Lisa Ambjörn has been actively participating in shaping a certain narrative around her writing. She specifically insists that the plot of the whole show had been established even before S1 started shooting.

SA plotline and the glaring absence of foreshadowing around it is just one example that makes me question this narrative.

[lit-in-thy-heart]

[ID: the train hitting a school bus meme. In the first panel, an empty school bus edges over train tracks and is labelled 'writing planned angst' with a train approaching. In the second panel, the train crashes into the bus and knocks it off the tracks. The train is labelled 'different angst suddenly writing itself'. End ID.]

[illegiblehandwriting1]

went to the best store on the planet aka barnes & noble yesterday with my heart set on shakespeare and had a crisis over whether i should get Fantasy Space Lesbian Necromancers or Man in Coma Loses Memory and Saves Human Race but with Real Physics (both of which i have yet to read but desperately want to) so of course i walked out with hamlet and the four swords manga *sighs in nerd*

[onyxsboxes]

My phone just survived a 3-metre fall and it's still working 🥹🥳

[existencebringsonlypain]

this place

THIS PLACE is testing my FUCKING PATIENCE

[the-bi-space-ace]

Daniel Jackson & Why Stargate SG-1 is the Best Show in the World

Here we go again. Listen, my obsession with this show knows no bounds and I’m going to simply have to take you through my thoughts on every character. 

Strap in. It gets long.

Daniel Jackson. Linguist and ancient aliens believer (Daniel. It really is your worst quality. Even worse that YOU WERE RIGHT HOLY MOLY) and he figured out how to dial the Stargate and get it to work. A character known for his intelligence and empathy, his moral compass and being petty as fuck. A man who pushes those around him to be better people, and to think outside of themselves. Also he has allergies which plays into a very cute intro to his character in the show where Jack literally tosses a tissue box into the Stargate to make contact with Jackson. Let’s get into it. 

We open season one with the SGC traveling back to Abydos where they left Daniel Jackson in the og movie after disaster struck (that disaster you may ask??? ….. I have no clue I haven’t watched it yet BUT I DIGRESS). There’s a problem. Aliens came through the Stargate and took one of their own. They need to talk to Daniel, to the Abydonians, and what follows is unfortunate. 

You see, they defeated Ra in the movie, a parasite pretending to be a god, and thought they were done with this villain. Unfortunately they’re facing a new one, same shit different name: Apophis - brother of Ra. And it turns out they aren’t finished with stealing and enslaving people. Now, the genre of villain they’re against is swift, cunning, technologically advanced, and ruthless. The Goa’uld. They attack Abydos and take a young boy named Skaara and Sha’re, Daniel’s wife, captive along with the SG team member. 

Ugh. Sha’re. Daniel is so sweet to her. They’re so clearly in love. Daniel Jackson has my favorite quality in a man which is that one of his primary personality traits is that he loves his wife. Ugh. It kills me that the Goa’uld took her away and he spends the next few years desperately tracking her down. The Goa’uld end up possessing both Sha’re and Skaara and it leads to Daniel Jackson rejoining the SGC and joining Jack O’Neill and Sam in SG-1. 

It’s important to note a few things about Daniel here that inform me about why he is the way that he is. He was orphaned as a child, he lost his wife whom he loved very much, and he is extremely empathetic. He basically imprints on every being he comes across that doesn’t have a family and that kills me. He’s desperate for connection and he tries to understand the motives and meaning behind everything. He cares about people. He cares about culture. He cares about respecting things you don’t understand. 

While we’re on the subject of imprinting, let's talk about Daniel and his friendships. We’ll start with Sam and Daniel. True science besties. I love every interaction between these two. It's like they found their platonic soulmate that they’ve spent their lives looking for. They info dump with each other, bask in each other’s intelligence and value it even when they have zero clue what the other is on about. Their friendship is pure and quick and beautiful and I can’t talk about Daniel without touching on how he quickly latches onto his friends and makes them important and how it makes his life fuller to have them. He does the same with Jack. They clearly care deeply for each other and Daniel finds a safe space in Jack. A space where he can push and be angry and ask questions and share how he feels and never receive rejection from Jack. Yes, they fight and argue and disagree but it is (typically) a safe disagreement where they’ll mend anything they hurt. Then there’s Teal’c. Teal’c, the man who is… kind of responsible for taking Sha’re from him. A man that Daniel wants to hate but can’t. Because Teal’c is a changed man. A man who had little choice. A man who Daniel has come to recognize as a friend and ally. This. This is big for Daniel. 

Imagine. Your wife is taken from you. The man responsible for choosing her to take is now saying he is going to help you defeat your enemies. He lives on earth with you. He is treated as an honorable man and warrior. He is part of your team. Your everyday life. And you forgive him. You forgive because it’s the right thing. You forgive because you know it’s not his fault. You forgive because your heart is big enough to do so. To not assign blame where it’s unfair. That is Daniel Jackson. That is who he is. And fuck do I admire this in him. If it were my partner taken, life stolen from them, parasites taken over their body and using them to harm people. If I had to look at the man who chose her every day I might not be so forgiving. I might not have it in me to see a difference. This quality is something I admire because it is something that would be excruciating for me. 

Speaking of excruciating things: watching Daniel’s face when someone he loves is in danger is like getting stabbed through the heart. One of the moments that sticks out in my mind is when Jack and Teal’c are trapped on a submarine that is being overrun by Replicators. Their only hope at not letting these bastards take over the earth is to blow it up, with both of them on it. Jack tells them to prepare to do it and Daniel is immediately against it. Jack takes his helmet off so he can hold the camera up so Daniel can see his face, can talk directly to him, and tells him to do it. When Daniel, in desperation, pushes again Jack reiterates that he does not want to die by the replicators. He doesn’t want his life to be over that way. Daniel has to let him and Teal’c go. Daniel eventually gives in but he refuses to look away while two of his friends die. (Spoiler alert is that they get saved at the last minute, thank fuck.) 

We watch this despair each and every time one of his loved ones is in danger. We watch his expression, his heartbreak, his feelings of powerlessness. He’s desperately done everything he can to keep them safe. Daniel is not a soldier. He is an academic. He doesn’t have the training that the rest of them do. He hasn’t been taught how to handle battlefields and death and loss like they have. Watching his friends get hurt or die is so devastating for him. They are his family. Losing them is like losing everything he has left, especially since losing Sha’re and leaving everyone on Abydos. His heart holds all of them so dear. 

We know he values his friendships, but what about the times he makes friends with beings from other planets? One of my favorite times is with an Unas who kidnaps him to sacrifice him. Now, Daniel spends a lot of time trying to communicate with this Unas. He shares food with him, talks, they play games. All while he’s being dragged through the wilderness to be slaughtered. He starts to understand the Unas, to learn that he has a connection with this one. Eventually this connection is what saves him in the end. Daniel even goes on a rescue mission to save this Unas when he gets captured in a later season. 

Then we have Reese. Oh, Reese. I liked her. She was an android responsible for creating the Replicators, a dangerous villain in later seasons of SG-1. Daniel spends time bonding with her, learning about her, and figuring out why she made the Replicators. She was lonely. She spent her life being told she was ‘made wrong’ and that she needed to be ‘fixed’. She was sad and emotionally uncontrolled. I’m about to be annoying about this but this is why Daniel bonds so well with her. She was lonely. She wanted friends. She wanted kinship. Daniel so desperately wants these things. He’s so lonely, has been since childhood. He sees himself in her. And when she dies he’s heartbroken. It’s the first time you hear him cuss at Jack, a line that will live in my head forever: You stupid son of a bitch. Now, Jack isn’t stupid. Daniel knows this. Daniel is angry. But Jack was just trying to protect him, doing the thing he does to show his love, and it was rejected. This moment stings. It stings because of the context. It stings because of when it happens. It stings because of what happens only a few episodes later. 

Daniel dies. Daniel dies because of his empathy and action. He dies protecting people. He dies. And it’s heartbreaking. Watching everyone say goodbye to him is one of the most tear-inducing moments so far. (I cried for… a long time.) Teal’c honors him in a way culturally significant to him with tears in his eyes. A man that is usually stoic and a strong silent type letting himself mourn a friend he’s grown to love. Sam cries and reminds him that she loves him and she wishes she could do more for him. He can’t even respond to her at that point but she sits with him and takes in what little time they have left. And Jack, well, he makes a joke. He tries to be serious about it but it’s too uncomfortably close to talking outright about his feelings so he makes some joke about how Daniel has been a pain in his ass for five years and despite all of that he has grown to admire the man that Daniel has become. It’s so painfully Jack O’Neill that it’s charming and gets Daniel to smile. (CAVEAT Daniel is not like… dead dead… I’ve been informed that he returns and my sadness over it is only temporary since the character will be back soon… and yet I still cried for over an hour over him.) 

The worst part is that there is a chance for him to be saved. But he stops them so he can ‘ascend’ and ‘do more’. And how does he stop them? Well, he talks to the one person he knows will respect his decision, the one person he knows will let him go, the one person he knows he can trust to have the responsibility to take care of it. Jack. He tells Jack to let him go, to make them stop, to let Daniel move on. And Jack, despondent and unhappy as he is to do it, does. It is horrible to watch. Daniel standing in front of Jack, crying, telling him he’ll miss everyone while Jack says ‘yeah. Me too.’ and lets Daniel go. Ugh. It kills me. He says at some point during the episode that his life is worth no more than anyone else’s. That he hasn’t done much. He’s not done enough to help. Oh boy. He’s so wrong. He’s so unbelievably wrong it hurts. He’s an idiot. Not enough? Daniel, sweetie, you’ve given your life to this. You’ve saved civilizations, saved earth, saved Skaara, what more do you need to know that you have done miraculous things? His low self esteem hurts me here. He doesn’t believe he’s done good, that he is good. How does a man who has given his life to this cause think so little of himself? Well, I think it stems back to his parents. 

Goodness. I believe his parents loved him more than the moon and all the stars. I believe they raised that boy with attention and affection and love and care and it is a damn shame that they died. It’s a damn shame they died at the same time. It’s bullshit that Daniel watched it. He watched both of his parents die when he was around 10-12 years old. He became an orphan in an instant. He went from two loving parents to the foster system in seconds. Now, he didn’t have to go to the system. He had a grandfather that could have adopted him but the man didn’t. He had a career more important than Daniel. I wouldn’t make the same choice if it were me. Hell, this little baby lost everything in a day and he needed someone. He needed love. He needed a home that was familiar. And instead of taking on the responsibility, instead of working through his anger and helping him cope you left him. My sympathies lie with Daniel here because I love him so deeply so I get angry when I think about little Daniel having a family member that could take him and instead being given up because of… what? A career? Some things are more important. (Sidenote that I am not condemning people for prioritizing themselves instead of having children… I am not ever going to have children and that is completely of my own free will and choice and wants and needs. What I am saying is that Daniel’s grandfather chose to leave him for the sake of himself and I think this rejection is where Daniel’s low self esteem comes from.)

His grandfather’s rejection is the start in a long line of rejections. Rejection from his peers, rejection from superiors, rejection from society. He finally finds somewhere he feels he belongs (Abydos) and that is gone too. In the blink of an eye. He thinks he isn’t good enough. And I think that blows. (Another side note that I think Daniel has at least ADHD if not also Autism and since I have both of those things I get really fiery about Daniel so… I’M BIASED OKAY.) He spends the rest of his life searching for connection, community, love. Hell, he even tries to infodump to Jack in episode one and faces yet another rejection of his skills and interests and I can’t help but feel like that hurts. Now, Jack does this song and dance often throughout the show with Daniel but it starts to feel more like they’re purposefully winding each other up and not like Jack is trying to hurt him. But… a different post for a different day. 

Now, I won’t lie. I am super drawn to characters like this. I had a huge crush on Milo from Atlantis as a kid and Daniel is very very close to that character in a lot of ways. The floppy hair, the glasses, the nerdiness, the excitable way he talks. So… I’m a little biased… but this character… this character rules. He’s sweet and kind and sometimes so petty it makes me laugh. He’s funny and charming and GOSH I JUST LOVE HIM OKAY. HE’S STUPID CUTE IT MAKES ME MAD. But. He has flaws. Flaws that make me like him even more but flaws nonetheless. He can be one track minded. He takes things into his own hands and puts himself in danger and puts his team in uncomfortable positions because of it. He lets his emotions get the better of him. He compartmentalizes by throwing his all into things like working and solving something. He’s a great man. But he’s confused and scared and has such low self-esteem it hurts. 

His flaws are on full display when he puts himself in immediate danger to stop Jack from destroying a ship that is about to wipe out a civilization that they helped get a new home for. Daniel has talked to this person, knows that he can prevent two civilizations from being destroyed, but Jack is focused on helping the one they’ve already connected with. Daniel disobeys Jack’s order. He puts himself in the path of an explosive in order to convince the other person to cease unintentionally destroying the planet in order to find another solution. While Daniel does succeed and it is the right thing he still puts Jack in a situation where he has to choose to sacrifice Daniel if he is to complete their mission and save a whole group of people. It isn’t fair. It hurts Jack, pisses him off, but Daniel isn’t putting that piece of it as his top priority. He’s putting saving two whole civilizations of history, art, and passion as his top priority. He doesn’t think past the consequences of what he’s doing. 

Another case like this is in season one, The Torment of Tantalus, where they find a device that contains information well beyond our wildest dreams. ‘Meaning of life stuff’ as he likes to say. He values this preservation of history and knowledge. Even more than his own life. His one track mindedness here almost gets him killed. Jack begs him to go, tries to force him, but Daniel refuses and again forces Jack to make the choice to leave him behind and get everyone else to safety. Now, Daniel does end up following and getting out of there but it does take him a little bit of time to come to the conclusion that he does have to leave. He can’t just give up his life to stay behind on a planet about to be destroyed by a storm. 

I want to touch on his pettiness for a moment because it is damn entertaining to watch him get… petulant for lack of a better word. I have never seen a man more willing to mouth off to high ranking government officials or question his bosses or down right taunt someone holding him captive. He will say some stupid joke in the driest tone I’ve ever heard and all I’m thinking is: yep this is the day he gets punched in the face. This is it. They’re going to do it. This man does not know when to shut up. My dear, sweet boy sometimes you have to SHUT UP!!! Self preservation, Daniel! Ever heard of it?!?! By far the best part of his pettiness is the looks him and Sam share when someone says something stupid. Some high ranking officer saying something stupid or derogatory? Sam and Daniel are sharing a ‘do you hear this guy?’ look. Someone being a bit too mouthy for their liking? They’re side-eyeing each other. They are true best friends. Having silent conversations with one another while everyone else in the room argues. I love their very first meeting. Sam geeking out over the dialing device while Daniel watches her like ‘who is this and why is she literally the most amazing person I’ve ever met’. Them interacting that whole first episode is just the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. They are best friends, your honor. I cherish them.

Daniel, above all, is the definition of what it means to have a found family. His was taken from him and he spends his life finding a family again. The great thing is that he does find it. He finds it and he holds on so tight. I’m still working through the seasons of Stargate but Daniel is an interesting and beautiful character. He’s traumatized and sad but he’s also wonderfully complex and still learning. 

If you haven’t watched Stargate consider this: the found family trope runs rampant here. There’s plenty of content to watch, plenty of relationships to explore, and plenty of things to be said about this show. Plus, you could write some damn good fic about it if you wanted to :)

[sergle]

also for folks who ask if I could try medical tourism instead: Technically I Could, Yes... that’s on the list of possibilities. only problem: adding even MORE steps to the process of getting my surgery kind of makes me want to cry.

[daisywords]

EVERYONE HOLD UP I think I just discovered the missing piece that connects the worldbuilding and the plot and the characters and everything and surprise surprise it's an element I was considering near the wip's genesis but discarded and now it's back in full force babey