#sexuality is weird and gender is like... such a vague concept

[piplupod]

[whispering nervously] hey i feel like this is the equivalent of throwing a beehive at a bear, but i genuinely do not understand what is going on with the latest queer label discourse,,, why is calling urself a mspec gay/bi lesbian/etc such an issue ?

[lesbiangiratina]

Not very fond of people like waving off testament’s gender as just a Gear Thing but well at least it becomes funny when people apply it to gears as a whole. Like yeah i can agree with that. It has nothing to do with being a gear tho theyre all just transgender

[thaltro]

this ask is a free pass to talk abt did/osdd as much as you want 👍

I love these free passes..thank you..please give me more 🫶🏽

Spending my pass on a rant about the online perception of DID/OSDD

One thing I find interesting is the concept of fake claiming and how that’s affected the community. In 2020 there was a large increase in mental health “awareness” online- mass vague posting of common symptoms and connecting it to larger disorders. This eventually lead to a lot of people misdiagnosing themselves with DID/OSDD. And Contrary to popular belief, I actually think most misdiagnosing was in good faith- younger teens for the first time connecting to disassociation, maladaptive day dreaming, emotional swings, PTSD, and derealization- and genuinely believing they had it. It’s more likely they had more common disorders like maybe Bpd, DDD, depression, psychosis- because there is a huge overlap in symptoms. (It’s also important to note it was also a huge awakening for actual systems too- because I’m definitely not saying everyone who had did/osdd in 2020 was misdiagnosed, in a lot of cases people were right!)

Buttttt

The internets reaction to this wasn’t with reeducation or kindness or even respectful criticism- it created a whole list of “faking signs”. I personally think the people who misdiagnosed themselves harmed the community much less then the people pushing for constant fakeclaiming. And now these arbitrary concepts plague actual systems pushing them into a deeper denial and opening them up to waves of unwanted harassment. Like ok, here’s some common misconceptions you’ll see (all the ones I’m listing are just bullshit and are contradicted with actual medical research)

-Systems can’t have fictives

-Systems can’t unmask

-Systems can’t have littles

-Systems can’t have factives

-Systems can’t have internal relationships

-Systems can’t have high amnesia

-Systems can’t have rapid switches

-Systems can’t have faceclaims or go by different genders/sexualities

ALL OF THIS IS BULLSHIT! None of these actually are backed up with medical research! And the worst part is I see groups of people just harass normal systems who show these normal symptoms and constantly fakeclaim them. I see cringe compilations, r/fake disorder cringe, tik toks, and video essays just spewing this nonsensical shit and it genuinely hurts. (It’s SO ANNOYING when they say shit like “people who do this hurt actual systems” YOUR HURTING ACTUAL SYSTEMS SHUT UP 😭) but Yes I do think there are people out their who do fake this disorder and use it to hurt and manipulate people. But I don’t think that’s the majority of misdiagnosed people. Even if someone was wrong I think it’s safer to just ignore them then to spread misinformation about DID/OSDD and encourage the possible harm onto genuine systems. (Also being wrong and admitting you are wrong is fine)

But yeah I’ll end my rant by saying If you support this weird online fakeclaiming witch hunts then I don’t want to associate with you. And to the self diagnosed systems or suspecting systems, it’s incredibly hard being in that position- harassment is almost guaranteed online and that sucks. Self diagnosis is valid especially if you can’t afford DID specialists- however with that statement If you do self diagnosis its necessary to do research. Don’t look at plural pedia or random websites- I recommend reading the DSM and The haunted self (it explains the fundamentals of structural dissociation)

PDF for the actual book ^^ (it’s also good for self diagnosed systems because it can help you weed out any other possible disorder overlap with BPD and PTSD)

But yeah 🙁 sorry for the rant I’m just really frustrated with the current climate of the internet especially for systems.

[yloiseconeillants]

OC Smash or Pass: Yloise Coneillants

Tagged by: @azure-dragonsinger (thank you!!)

Tagging: free tag for anyone who hasn't been tagged yet (PLEASE tag me if you haven't!!)

Rules: pretty self explanatory. include physical descriptions or pics, and propaganda. the “other” label can be used for “sexuality misalignment” (ie: oc is femme and you’re gay, vice versa or you aren’t into smashing but a specific thing you wanna do with them like perhaps hug or study them under a microscope idc).

Quick Facts:

Height: 6' something or other (very short for an Elezen)

Age: 35ish

Pronouns: she/her

Gender: clown daughter

Sexuality: bisexual

Pros:

Pocket healer! Very good at her job! Which is healing! Which you may need! Attentive bedside vigils a specialty!

Exceedingly cahoots-driven. Loves to toss herself into a scheme and will drag you along. It'll be fine. Everything always works out fine! An adventure, even!

Knows every food cart in Eorzea and beyond like it's her calling. Feeling peckish at 2:45 am in Thavnair? No worries, she knows a spot.

Intensely curious about the world and what drives people. Inquisitive, but respects boundaries (except the laws of nature, those she's trying to break pretty often).

Tries very hard to cultivate a welcoming atmosphere and meet people where they are. She doesn't like to give up on what other people think are lost causes.

Cons:

Will Not Engage unless she's like 100% certain that whatever Romantic Thing may or may not be happening is In Fact Happening and Absolutely Reciprocated.

Invites you over for dinner at her place and it's probably oatmeal. She cannot cook. (that being said, she will find something good for you to eat. just not by her hand)

Bad communicator. Avoids facing her own problems with increasingly niche distractions. Will indulge your bad coping mechanisms.

You will probably get arrested at some point.

She might be haunted?

Details:

Indulges fairly regularly in recreational drug use - mostly psychedelics and tobacco.

Not really into monogamy as a concept - prefers to remain uncommitted (if devoted). Putting labels on things will spook her.

If she does get spooked, she'll ghost for a bit and then reappear and act like nothing weird happened at all.

Very accommodating as a switch: she's a little dubious as a dom, but tries valiantly if that's desired. Enthusiastic sub and prone to giggles in bed.

Very touchy and affectionate once she's been given leave to do so - platonically or otherwise. She spends a lot of time observing how people respond to touch and acting accordingly.

Absolutely delighted by sincerity, earnestness, and corny acts of romanticism. Your attempts are much more important than the results.

Weird about Your Insides! If You're Into That!! (She is!!)

Elezen Neck

[partywithponies]

BEGGING U TO ELABORATE ABOUT THE WHIFFERDILLS

OKAY OKAY listen. listen. I'll give you the brief version.

Whifferdills, originally from the Doctor Who comics, where things can get already get really weird and conceptual, are one of the most alien alien species in the Whoniverse, even by comics standards. They're shapeshifters, right? Nothing new or strange in sci-fi. Except usually when a shapshifting character or species is plot relevant and lore-important, the writer will write in some kind of limitation to their powers. Some kind of set of rules. But when it came to Whifferdills, they just... didn't.

Whifferdills can be anything. Literally. They can be inanimate objects. They can be puddles of liquid. They can be microbes. They can be the size of mountains. They don't seem to have one set default form that they revert back to, they're supposed to be always changing. Frobisher staying in one form most of the time is established to be him just being a little freak by his own species's standards, and even then, the form he stays in is. A penguin. Because he just likes penguins. Whifferdills don't age, at least not physically, unless they actively choose to, because they have conscious control over what their own bodies do at all times. They are functionally immortal. They are almost impossible to kill. Try to throw them off a cliff and they'll shapeshift instantly into something that can fly. Try to drown them and they'll shapeshift into something with gills. Throw them into a vacuum and they'll shapeshift into something that doesn't need to breathe at all. They don't inherently need to breathe at all. Shoot them or stab them and they'll just shapeshift the wound closed. In his first story Frobisher shapeshifts into a burger and survives someone literally eating part of him and is entirely unaffected outside of being mildly annoyed.

All this to say, Whifferdills are weird as hell and OP as shit. There is literally no reason to assume they reproduce sexually or organically. Why would they even? How would pregnancy even work, in a being whose body is by design supposed to be ever-changing? And how can you spend half your existence living as insects or cash registers and still have a concept of gender? Again, why would they even?

And to bring up just a few specific moments: in one comic, Frobisher (in penguin form) mistakenly believes he's laid an egg, and The Doctor (with the air of someone who's had to explain this before) tells Frobisher that this is impossible, because he's a male penguin, and Frobisher still seems a little confused by this. And to be clear, Frobisher is supposed to be highly intelligent. Frobisher is a notorious wanted criminal. Frobisher is a professional private detective. The Doctor sees Frobisher more as an equal and a partner than a companion. Frobisher plays chess against the TARDIS for fun. And Frobisher struggles to remember the difference between male and female penguins, the species he has a vaguely autistic special interest in.

And in the Big Finish audio The Maltese Penguin, Frobisher makes an offhand comment about he finds the humanoid form particularly tricky, because they have all these "odd dangly bits" that he can't see the purpose of.

I put it to you that Whifferdills do not even have a concept of biological sex or gender, because it's just so far outside of their perception of life and the universe. The TARDIS just translates Frobisher as "he" and Francine as "she" for the benefit of us the audience and the benefit of people like Peri, who in return could not even begin to fully comprehend the lived reality of a Whifferdill.

[princess-of-the-corner]

Ooh Ranma 1/2, so much fun gender and sexuality stuff there.

I tend to go with gender fluid or trans girl Rama, the latter being especially rooted in the fact Ranma generally seems a lot happier in curse mode and across the manga says and does a lot of things indicate a deep sense of connection with her cursed form. While everything to do with her birth body is wrapped up in duty and social expectations.

Ryoga did indeed get upset that Ranma complained about her curse, something to the effect of "You call having a huggable body like that a curse!?" So its very easy to read her as trans too :3c I love utilizing Ryoga's fangs and saying the Hibiki family are descended from Oni whose mountain was destroyed & so they have no internal compass.

I feel like Ukyo is tragically underutilized and frankly could have easily served as the 'main rival' to Ranma though it'd likely have been more tragic in tone. Also very much lean on Ukyo being gender fluid, or a very specific (But variable) exploration of butch womanhood.

Shan Pu just doesn't put labels on sexuality and the concept is rather weird to her, though she'll occasionally play into "Normal" social roles if it lets her antagonize someon- Akane, she antagonizes Akane.

Akane also has ISSUES due to the social pressures put on girls, her own complicated relationship with femininity, and it all got violently magnified by the boys morning charge. Hence why she's soo aggressively closed off to some stuff like Ranma's curse, or sexuality & so committed to being "Normal". & the boys charge for a date is why she tends to have a default "boys are inherently bad" mentality early on.

Also all three Tendo sisters were messed up by their mother dying and their father basically becoming none functional for years. Soun did eventually sort of get his act together as he has some sort of role in the local council, but he's still not really a functional parent.

As a result, Kasumi was parentified and basically forsook anything she wanted to fulfill the role of mother. Akane was such a handful due to her age & her efforts to study martial arts that she became the focus of Kasumi & what little attention Soun had. This left Nabiki feeling disconnected and isolated from her family and with a rather "Take care of myself" mentality. She & Kasumi still have a degree of a bond, as the older sister did compensate for some of Nabiki's more reckless ventures, but also never told her that or confronted her about some of her bad decisions, so Nabiki's only vaguely aware Kasumi has been in her corner. Nabiki also 100% finds Ranma's cursed form attractive.

Tatewaki, for all his shitty behavour otherwise, is actually a surprisingly good big brother to Kodachi, and their dad is fucking AWFUL, so he's actually right to be as paranoid as he is about the guy. Gtrnted being raised by a brother who is 1 year older and ninja servants who enable every unhinged idea one has is who the two are rather childish.

Everyone needs therapy actually.

[butch-corvid]

About me:

You can call me Crow. I’m a poly butch in his 20s, and a switch, though this blog tends to feature more submissive thoughts. I’m primarily t4t. I have experience with kink in private and through the broader community and I’m making this blog to explore fantasies and make friends. I’ve been on T for a year. Use he/him usually, or it/its if you’re trying to turn me on. Exclusively masc titles and terms unless I tell you otherwise. I have two girlfriends but I’m down for anons and DMs. Actually I love attention from mean women/girlthings. I follow back from co***************an

DNI: minors, no age in bio, bigots, pedos, cishet men

Posts tagged #diary. are actual abridged writeups of actual scenes I have done with actual people. They were all consented-to, prenegotiated roleplays. Do not be weird on any of my posts, but on these ones especially.

I typically don’t tag reblogs, so if my kinks are triggering, only look at posts tagged “mine.” and filter according to my tag guide.

Kinks (in vague order of frequency on the blog):

-gender & sexuality play! not in the “be cishet” way, but still playing with concepts of gender/sexuality and the tropes & heuristics we use in our interactions with queer people. this does include homophobia and transphobia, through language (slurs/pejoratives) and content (transmisogynistic tropes, misgendering, predatory queers, identity invalidation). tagged “identity.”

-forcefem (typically in a butch lesbian—-> femme lesbian context; super light on bioessentialism). tagged “forcefem.”

-CNC, including everything from high-resistance to intox to somno. tagged “cnc.” but also “intox.” and “somno.” when applicable.

-Breeding. tagged “breeding.”

-Group/free use/threesomes/gangbangs

-edge play (Intense fear, knives, and occasionally guns). will be tagged as “edge.” and the corresponding subcategory will also be tagged

-Primal

-politics/class play. i like rich women abusing their power over my poor working class pussy < 3

-Leather (boots, heels, gloves, harnesses, everything)

-Sadomasochism

-Religion

-Degradation

-Orgasm denial/edging

-monsterfucking (knotting and tentacles and heats and)

- pet play (I’m a birdsub and a mothsub which means I am literally the only person alive creating content for this </3)

Limits: medplay, ageplay, raceplay, bodily fluids that are NOT sweat, blood, cum, or spit, detrans, patriarchy

[ticklishraspberries]

hi hello i hope this isn't weird but what do you love about The Great? I finally have hulu and im about to start watching it because of you fr like i dont go there but I WANNA GO THERE // @tickle-bugs

omg hi i love this question!! i'm gonna tell you my favorite and my least favorite aspects so u can make a genuinely informed decision lol!! i believe this is all vague enough to not give anything away but give you a genuine review of the show to help you decide to watch it!! i would LOVE if you watched it, i think if you wrote a fic for this in your gorgeous style, i would DIE bc...i just know you'd KILL IT but also 0 pressure, seriously.

my favorite things about the great are:

the characters are all incredibly well-written, well-rounded, and well-acted - especially elle fanning's portrayal of catherine

the humor is sort of dirty/low-hanging fruit but it genuinely always makes me laugh, every episode, someone will say/do something so absurd or hilarious that it cracks me up

the dynamics between all the characters are fascinating - it takes place in a country/time period where class/status, gender, etc. all are so important to your place in society, and yet, characters often have unlikely imbalances of power and different dynamics that you might not expect

the romance is so compelling, just about every romantic relationship has so many layers to it and plays into many different tropes: you have the doomed-by-the-narrative lovers, the childhood besties to star-crossed lovers, the enemies AND lovers simultaneously...just the romance and the sexual scenes are all so compelling and well-done, they clearly had a great intimacy coordinator on this or smth bc damn

THE COSTUMES ARE SO FUCKING STUNNING, like the costumes are indescribably beautiful and actually breath-taking. the dresses that all the main women wear are like actually perfect, i want to steal them all. elle fanning is so beautiful and they manage to make her look even more amazing, like her hair/makeup/outfits are just incredible, but everyone looks so good.

this show doesn't use "it was a different time period" to justify any lack of diversity - there are characters of all different races, multiple canonically queer characters, women are badass and well-written/represented, and while it does address issues like aspects of discrimination in russia during that time period, there is very little actual racism/homophobia in the show, like the characters who are black or queer do not suffer.

my least favorite things about the great are:

the historical inaccuracy is self-proclaimed, but gets a bit silly at times - catherine the great was so fascinating and well-documented in history, but they really just took a concept and ran with it without even trying to get anything right? there are little things like, the number/gender of siblings catherine had, but then the huge differences like how catherine rose to power and became empress. it makes a compelling story, but if you're a history buff, it can be frustrating!!

on that topic, it does gloss over a lot of the good that catherine the great did in real life as it gets caught up in the drama/comedy/romance of the show and forgets to show her as the genuinely accomplished woman she was.

this is a big one: it got cancelled. i haven't finished s3 yet, but i'm a few episodes in and i'm not confident that it is going to end on a fully satisfying note. if a show being cancelled is a turn-off for you, this one did just end and i'm still not sure if the ending is anti-climactic or not, lol.

lastly, this doesn't personally bother me, but it is extremely inappropiate. there is a lot of violence (not too much gore, everything is either very obviously fake, or not explicit), nudity/sex, and totally vulgar language. there is a lot of infidelity, implied/mentioned SA but no scenes that are violent or explicit, overuse of the word "cunt", etc. so just proceed with caution and consider looking up content warnings if you're wary!!

[dogfags]

rambles about gender and how I don't understand it

I think I'm just too autistic to understand the concept of gender or rly.. figure out my own gender identity. like I don't think I even have one? I want to live my life as a man and present and be seen as one. but I don't FEEL any kind of gender. like transitioning was more of an aesthetic choice for how I want to look and be seen by others. but "gender" is such a vague concept to me and I never felt any kind of gender I just do things and people ascribe gender to them. like when I was a kid I did not think about gender at all until puberty started and I began having trans thoughts™ and day dreaming about swapping bodies with boys I knew or becoming a boy or pretending to be a boy on the internet. I guess I don't feel like I'm nonbinary bc most nonbinary people I've met at least still feel and understand gender. but I don't even get it in other people really. like I know gender and presentation are different but presentation is kinda all gender is to me. if there's nothing physical to ascribe to gender and it's just an abstract concept I literally cannot wrap my head around that. which is partially why I don't understand some GNC trans people. not that I ever question them or tell them they're fake but I just don't get it? I don't get how you can "feel" a gender but not want to present or be seen as that gender. if there's nothing physical for me to hold onto I don't really understand gender as a concept. I consider myself a trans man bc I take T and got surgery to look more like one so that I can live as a man in society. so if people aren't doing those things I just don't get why they're trans bc to me trans isn't a feeling.... gender is not a feeling... when people say they "feel" like a man or woman I literally cannot fathom what they mean. I don't and have never "felt" like a man. if I wanted to I could have just lived as a woman my whole life. like I would have been depressed/suicidal bc I have gender dysphoria but I still COULD have. it's confusing to me that all trans people have a different experience of being trans and like there's no real set of symptoms or whatever to ascribe to transness bc everyone is so different. I don't know what makes me trans. I suspect for me it's just a mental disorder that comes from my C-PTSD and history of sexual trauma. I tried living as a woman and I fucking hated it, but like idk. with enough therapy maybe I could have been "saved" from transitioning lmfao idk. I have accepted a while ago that I am not a typical trans person and don't have the experience most trans people have nor do I understand others experiences. that's why I feel so alienated from the trans community. I don't "feel" trans. and for a long time I rejected any specific labels and I am starting to get back to that but "trans" just makes sense for me in how it is literally defined. I've read a lot of radfem stuff and queer theory stuff trying to make sense of it from all angles. sometimes I can follow the logic. sometimes I'm just like, no this makes no sense for me. maybe for other trans people but not me. I'm in a weird place bc I'm dating a cis gay man and I don't feel.. worthy? to be doing that? like, idk. I feel like he'd be happier with another cis man. but maybe not. who knows. if all I am is a woman who wants to live as a man then that's fine with me, I don't really care what gender I am lol. I just know how I want to look and present to the public eye. this is why ppl think I'm truscum or whatever but I'm not, I don't push my feelings about my own gender onto others. I don't rly care what other people do and call themselves even if I don't "get it." by some definitions I am nonbinary but I have little interest in exploring that as an identity for myself as I've done it before and just feel more dysphoria at the fact I am not "really a man" but some mysterious third thing. I have theories about where my gender dysphoria comes from but none of it is proven and it's kind of a waste of time to dwell on it. anywayyyyyy

[sunlitmcgee]

 Hello! This is a ramble-style masterpost type thing about the version of c!Benchtrio that is in my fic “Heal What Has Been Hurt.” It is filled with headcanons, ramblings, interpretations and general behind the scenes things that I’ve had in mind when it comes to how I write them and their various gender presentations throughout the course of the fic.

 I’d like to say that I am a GNC fem-presenting AFAB transman. This is just something to keep in mind when it comes to my thoughts and opinions on the concept of gender, gender identity and presentation. If anything here doesn’t align with your personal experiences, that’s okay! Just please don’t be an asshole, because this is based upon MY experiences with gender identity and is inherently quite personal for me.

 Another thing I’d like to say is that while the majority of what I say here is related to my AU fic, some things reflect my feelings around DSMP canon and my perspectives of the characters 

I always wanna remind that HWHBH!Benchtrio’s relationship is strictly queerplatonic and that anything described here is not meant to be taken as romantic or heaven’s for-fucking-bid sexual. If you think something here is…just….keep it to yourself and don’t say it to me. Pretty fuckin please.

 And on that last note, nothing here is meant to apply to ANY of the CCs who created these characters. This is about the characters and ONLY the characters. This isn’t a place for truthing or whatever. Get the fuck outta here with dat shit.

Don’t be weird, ya dumb piece of cu-

Let’s get into it, shall we!

 For starters, let’s start off with the basic idea that, to me, Mister Author Man, whose opinions on these characters obviously shape the way I write them but shouldn’t be taken as the word of god when it comes to vague stuff that’s more open to interpretation, all 3 of HWHBH!Benchtrio embody a sort of “archetype” of masculinity. A different flavor, one might say. Their presentations and performances of the concept vary, but the core idea of “man-ess” is present in all 3, albeit to varying extents.

 If we want to go in order from “most masc” to “least masc” in terms of traditional ideas/roles, then let’s begin with our darling little draggie goat HWHBH!Tubbo.

 HWHBH!Tubbo is buff.

 HWHBH!Tubbo is fat, muscular, and heavy set.

 HWHBH!Tubbo is short but built like a full-grown bull, horns and muscles and all.

 And above all else, HWHBH!Tubbo is the member of the trio that to me embodies the sort of masculinity that I shall lovingly deem “The Stronk Guy.”

 When it comes to how he’s dressed/often described, you rarely see HWHBH!Tubbo in anything traditionally feminine. He wears tank-tops, button-ups, heavy coats and thick winter pants. He wears overalls,which are a very boyish sort of clothing item commonly associated with the American South and physical labor, usually on a farm. The two sets of horns of his head make up for his generally short stature, making him seem as tall as he is wide, thus increasing the intimidating presence he has thanks to his claws, scales, wings and oh yeah constant smoke that pours out from every hole on his round little face. Round face=wide facial features=square shape. Squares in terms of character design are often used for characters that are sturdy and strong with a big presence in the scenes they’re in. Another very “macho” trait. Manly men get your attention as soon as they are in the room.

 Out of the 3, Tubbo is the one that works out the most.

 He is the one who performs most maintenance-based tasks around the house, such as repairing furniture. 

 He helps with the farms in Snowchester and lifts many heavy tools.

 He’s the one that gets a spider out of the house when it scares Michael when he goes to lay in his little race car bed.

 He picks both of HWHBH!Alliumduo up like they weigh nothing.

 And he is the one that makes Tommy go from “C!Tommy if he had proper therapy” to “stereotypical young teen girl swooning over her popular jock crush in an early 2000’s disney channel original movie” thanks to those burly arms of his. He has a way. With the Tommy.

 Boy could snap you like a motherfucking glowstick-

 Basically, when in regards to his gender and overall presentation, HWHBH!Tubbo is the kind of boy who is best at home in himself when he can go at with his power tools in the lab and go home wiping the sweat from his brow to his two lovely partners so that he can eat dinner, help with all the dishes, take a bath and kiss both his children’s foreheads, then flop himself onto the bed and hug both of his platonic husband’s.

 He isn’t a very girly boy.

 And that is okay!

 HWHBH!Tubbo doesn’t feel drawn to most typical “girly” things. He mostly wears earth-tones along with his coats and leather jackets. He likes flowers, yeah. But everyone likes flowers! And he cannot cook for shit, so in his mind, he really isn’t the “”lady”” of this household.

 (Any usage of words like “woman”, “man”, lady-like or “manly” here are intended to refer to the traditional stereotypical Western ideas behind gender and gender roles. Just as a friendly reminder!)

 But there’s a reason behind heal!Tubbo’s specific brand of manliness that isn’t just his personal preference. Think back to Manburg. Pogtopia era. Think back to the time when c!Tubbo served as a political spy during a time of war against a nation that was ruled by c!Schlatt: a bumbling idiot obsessed with “gains” and protein powder who constantly hurled verbal abuse and beat down on anyone who defied him, be it physically with his hands or politically through various abuses of authority.

c!Schlatt is an almost Comical icon of toxic masculinity. Loud. Harsh. Always quick to Anger. Aggressive and self absorbed. Dismissive of the emotions of others including his own and valuing raw strength and power above all else. On several occasions, there were scenes where he’d directly attack the masculinity of the cabinet members, be it telling c!Fundy(a transman!) that he’ll “never be a man” or talking down to c!Tubbo and calling him weak, soft, cowardly and all manner of insults commonly hurled at people our society sees as men who don’t conform to a rigid binary.

 With hwhbh!Tubbo, he has taken that weakness that an abuser saw in him and Embraced it for the strength it actually is. He is soft. He’s fat with a big round belly! He’s physically strong, yes, again, bulk like a tank. But in terms of his emotions, by Schlatt’s standards, he’s much Weaker than he used to be because of how open and vulnerable he is: and that’s a Good Thing.

 Manliness isn’t toughing it out and beating down on anyone that defies you. Manliness is giving your 2 kids 20 kisses on they little heads as you hold them to your chest and carry them upstairs for bedtime.

Manliness is Softness.

Manliness is Openness.

Manliness is Gentleness.

Manliness can let you Heal.

 Let’s talk about heal!Ranboo. Much like Tubbo, Ranboo has a pretty typically masculine presentation. He wears suits, formal vests, sweaters and button-ups, but has a dash of more feminine apparel with his various earrings and rings and necklaces that contrast to the lone wedding bane and bee-charm bracelet we see on heal!Tubbo.

 Fashion aside, heal!Ranboo’s sheer height makes him stick out like a sore thumb. He’s a tall, thin creature with long, gangly limbs and shiny scales. He’s a fighter! He knows how to handle himself in a scuffle. He prefers to use his words and to avoid fighting via diplomacy, but he is not afraid to use violence(or at the very least Threaten To) when it comes to Clingyduo or his children. It’s best to say he simply has a bit more self Restraint than Tubbo. But only Just.

 heal!Ranboo is the middle child of heal!Benchtrio. Despite this, he is the universally agreed upon “mature one” and often takes the role of the “””straight””” man compared to clingyduo’s goofy mischief.

 With this notable maturity, Healboo, like his counterpart in canon, takes it upon himself to be the household’s main Provider. He’s the breadwinner. The moneymaker. The one who goes out each day to work and toil in the mines to gather resources to bring home. He brings home the bacon! Therefore, he is also the one in charge of the family’s Finances. His name is on the contract for the mansion’s construction. There were many jokes about c!Tubbo being a golddigger, way back when the two first got married. I see no reason to say that there weren’t similar jokes made between the two when they first got together in HWHBH.

 Financial control is a right that’s long been limited to men. Men do the work, pay the bills, own the house and make the Big Choices for a family.

 Going back to the point about his skills in combat, it is traditionally a Man’s job to protect his family. It’s Man’s Work to be tough and fend off the danger. The man brings home the Kill(money and household finances) while the woman cooks, cleans, raises the children and provides whatever Affection her husband may require. Golddiggers, as a concept, are women who specifically seek out Wealthy Men to reap the riches from this(very harmful) arrangement.

 But all of this hinges on the idea that a man is a tough, strong, scary, loud go-getter who’ll lash out at any opportunity to climb up The Ladder ™. 

If not that, then a wealthy man is one who has to be Smart. Clever. Good with his words. A charmer. A suave, dapper figure in fitted clothes with well-kept hair. A man with visible wealth in the form of pretty jewelry. A tall, dark and handsome kind of fella. A princely sort! This type of Man is one you see at gentlemen’s clubs and cashios who most certainly is inclined towards the academics.

 hwhbh!Ranboo is. Basically that. He’s just transmasc. And aromantic asexual. And platonically gay. And riddled with 70 flavors of psychosis that’s worsened by his severe anxiety, paranoia and memory issues.

 (hwhbh!Ranboo is, specifically, a young trans man who had his body hijacked and controlled by an older man in a position of authority who used that control to abuse him and his loved ones. Just a side note to think about)

 Basically, hwhbh!Ranboo has the Aesthetics of the “tall, dark and handsome and filthy Rich suave ladies man” type of manhood…just as a paint over a very anxious, very emotionally-driven young queer boy.

 He spoils his beloveds. He coddles and pampers them. He is a partner who finds joy in showering his qpps with material gifts In Tandum with his physical affection and words of praise. In many “traditional”(read: sexist and fucked up) circles, this would make him someone who is perceived as Weak. He’d be Emasculated for his behavior.

 But ofc, he’d be denied his manhood in the first place in these types of circle, because being trans, heal!Ranboo’s masculinity is one Directly in contrast to the roles he’d be put into on the basis of his birth sex. 

 That makes you think: maybe there’s a reason Ranboo sticks to very masculine dress when he’s out and about, and only wears stuff like dresses and skirts when he’s at home with his two partners. People he trusts. People he feels safe around.

 heal!Ranboo is a breadwinner/provider who turns to those he provides for for comfort and safety.

Manliness is seeking Comfort.

Manliness is not viewing your Fears as a Flaw.

Manliness is indulging in self Expression that makes you feel the most like Yourself.

Manliness is showing Love to those you care for.

Manliness is Caring.

Manliness is Gentleness. 

 Now. Let’s talk about the main character protagonist himself. c!Tommy. The boy. The guy himself. The most character ever of all time in the history of anything.

 hwhbh!Tommy is, to put it simply: A pretty boy.

 He’s very pretty! He’s got long hair that goes well past his shoulders, shiny blue eyes, a lean(for the most part) figure that makes him rather petite next to Beeduo, and a pair of earthy brown wings that have flecks of gold on each feather. He wears skirts, dresses, lace, silk and cardigans. Most of his outfits have either natural earthy tones(greens, blues, browns, etc) or brighter pastels(purple, pink, white etc). He wears jewelry. He had butterfly pins that he bought from Claries. 

 On top of that, he’s got a shit ton of plushies, blankets, pillows and general soft cutesie comfort items. Plushie Henry is a big one.

 He’s got many traditionally girly hobbies and interests. Knitting. Sewing. Cooking/baking. Gardening. He loves to sing and likes to read about the symbolism of different flowers. He’s made a point for there to be plenty of plant life in the Big Innit such as in the lobby and connected cafe. While video games are stereotype as being a “boys’ thing”, one of heal!Tommy’s favorite games is OMORI, which is a game with a very cutesy art style that consists of soft pastel colors and a cute, feel good ost. Again. Very girly, very pretty.

 heal!Tommy is a character that I’ve given a lot of my Personal Gender Stuff as a transguy who found myself leaning into a lot of girly cutesy feminine things when I was first recovering from my trauma. For me, it was a matter of being able to indulge in media/hobbies/aesthetics that gave me a sense of comfort and safety while also further allowing me to explore my gender. 

 For hwhbh!Tommy, it’s a matter of him finally being able to indulge in what gives him the most joy without being hurt for it: loving things, loving people, and caring for them. Being a nurturer.

Who sings to the flowers to help them grow?

Who made a Prime Path and keeps it maintained?

Who inspired Wilbur Soot to make L’manburg, acting as a sibling’s muse?

Who fills the server with music? With song?

Who reaches out and tries to mend broken relationships?

Who forgives?

Who tries his very best to understand, even when it hurts him more?

Who is the person that takes care of the server? 

 c!Tommy is a character who is Driven by Love. Platonic love. Familial Love. This boy loves and he loves to SHOW his love to people by caring for them in whatever way he is able to. He isn’t always the best at it. He is often brash and harsh and loud and blunt and yes, annoying. He’s a little shit.

 He’s weird in a weird little girl way.

 He is also an incredibly caring, sweet, emotionally intelligent person who always puts the needs of others First Before His own, often always to his own detriment. Caring for cWilbur in Pogtopia. Reaching out to cBeeduo during the outpost. Forgiving cEmeraldduo, time and time again. Asking his abuser “why don’t you hurt” while in the prison.

 In my experience as an AFAB individual, women* (*or people society views as women) are expected to 1: keep their own emotions bottled up and tend to the emotional needs of others around them, 2: be quiet, submissive, polite and “ladylike” 24/7 constantly. Or else we will be labeled as annoying hysterical bitches who are just looking for attention.

 Sound familiar?

 In HWHBH, Tommy’s gradual shift from his original masculine presentation of a plain t shirt and pants to his current mix of sweaters, skirts and dresses is a visual way to show his shift throughout his recovery.

At the start of the fic, Tommy was still riding the aftershocks of his near-death in the prison. He wore simple clothes, lived in an empty house, hardly ate, slept and was unable to take care of himself. The entire first chapter is XD watching him nearly freeze to death because he wandered out into the forest without a coat while dissociating. His hair was thin and cut short. He thought that beeduo wanted nothing to do with him. He was unwell. He was alone.

 But look at him now. Long, thick hair. Healthy diet. Gained some weight. (Mostly) healthy sleep schedule. Lots of family members and friends he talks to daily, either in person or over the phone.

He has a garden.

He sings to the flowers.

He sings constantly.

He is always singing or talking or downing something. He enjoys doing chores. He thinks it’s fun.

 Throughout the entirety of the DSMP storyline, c!Tommy was punished for Wanting. For wanting People. For wanting to be Loved. For wanting TO love without having whatever/whoever he cared about taken away. Now he has a child(2 actually, he’s just silly and hasn’t realized it) and a father and 2 platonic partners who love him dearly. He has hobbies and favorite TV shows. He grows his hair out, wears skirts and plays with his father’s make-up. He gets flustered when Beeduo call him pretty or beautiful. He watches Sailor Moon. He made an oc self insert for it. He regularly daydreams about heal!beeduo being tuxedo mask the same way a female lead in a teen romcom talks about going on cheesy dates with her crush. He has a flower cow with buttercups on it. 

 Michael calling him Mummy and Shroud calling him Mimi doesn’t need an explanation, I feel.

 For a character whose main joke catchphrase is some variation of “I’m a Big Man”, cTommy really is very Girl Coded. Hwhbh!Tommy is just the result of me taking that and amplifying it for the sake of comedy and fluff. Mostly fluff. Because I think he’s a character who deserves the softness that can come from “girl stuff” and things we commonly associate with femininity.

Masculinity and Femininity and all forms of gender stuff and gender expression are, at the end of the day, just made up gobbledy gook we humans made up in the same way we made up shit like Money and Language. But I still like to talk about them, because it’s a topic I find to be very interesting and important when it comes to storytelling.

Manliness is Nurturing.

Manliness is Loyalty.

Manliness is the capacity to care for and protect and fight for what you value the most.

Manliness is the attempt, however vain, to understand the people around you(though ofc, there are always times when you shouldn’t because it isn’t Safe for you)

Manliness, like Womanliness, is whatever YOU want to make of it. Same with any other clusterfuck of a queer identity. 

I just think that hwhbh!Benchtrio’s gender stuff is fun to talk about. I hope you enjoyed reading about it :)

[yiga-hellhole]

please give me your ghirahim headcanons im curious （＾_＾）

OH WOW!!!!!!!! okey :3 i don't think about ghira as much as i do zant, but it's about time i do so given that he's the protag of my fic. under the cut!!

he sews. the ghirahim tag is full of him in multiple outfits and i really enjoy the thought of him having different styles for different occasions. but think about it. he has a very refined and campy taste, but throughout skyward sword you don't really see many people with the skilled hand to make fine garments. thatleaves him to do it!!

he doesn't have to eat or drink anything whatsoever, given that he's made of metal and has no actual internal organs. but he might have some minor fascination with the concept.

obligatory gender/sexuality headcanon. he's masc-leaning nonbinary but wears whatever the hell. he has no gender whatsoever and uses masculine pronouns exclusively like one would a fashion accessory. also gay. or bisexual with heavy male lean. or homoflexible, if people still say that

contrary to popular belief he has little to no experience with romance. he has kind of a little girl watching princess movies' understanding of the prospect

speaking of being made of metal. he's weird to touch. even under his false skin, he's kind of cold to the touch (unless he has been sitting in the sun, or under a blanket, or in a warm bath for a while), is *way* heavier than a guy his size should be, and underneath the minor padding of his false skin he's hard like a rock

this one is so widely accepted it probably isn't just my headcanon anymore but his left ear was docked as punishment by demise

he's actually kind of a friendless loser and incredibly lonely all the time. throughout skyward sword, link is the only being that will speak (or, really, other than the one or two times you can snark him, listen) to him, and even before that he spent centuries talking to literally nobody. that's why he acts like *gesturing vaguely* That. and it really, REALLY pisses him off that link is his only conversational partner, ever

him and fi are kind of like estranged siblings. they were made for the same purpose for different sides, and he remains ambivalent about her. the way she's so monotonous and serious completely ticks him off, though

this isn't even a headcanon either. he has issues. demise could grind him to paste into the dirt with his heel and he'd just say thank you. in hyrule warriors, though zant resents his timeline's ganondorf for casting him aside, ghirahim still remains loyal to demise and unquestioningly follows ganondorf, and might even blame himself for his true master's loss all those millennia ago.

this is also obvious. he's an awful dancer, while zant is actually kind of really good at it. this pisses him off also

during hyrule warriors, ghirahim is the best commander when it comes to hand-to-hand combat, while zant is the better strategist. they fill each other out near perfectly because ghirahim's idea of strategy is the same as that of a 10 year old playing pokemon and zant. um. well, just look at him. ghirahim understands bloodshed, but every other aspect of war he has not the slightest clue about

[wyldblunt]

Glyn question! Idk if you’ve talked about this before but I was wondering what your vibes on his Gender Stuff are. I extremely enjoy your “cis people never heard of xir” approach to OCs and would love to know what metaphorical part of the open-world gender map Glyn has unlocked.

i haven't ever talked abt is specifically before, i think! to be honest he's one of the ocs whose gender i've put the least thought into? or at least it's like, i have some vague ideas in my mind but i've never bothered putting it to words before. which actually coincidentally is largely how glyn feels about gender

i think he just straight up didn't think about it (and probably used any/all pronouns) until he had already left the nightmare court and started traveling up around kryta and ascalon, and therefore interacting with more different people who had Genders. he's never really thought about it specifically but at some point he started observing and absorbing different kinds of masculinity from the kinds of people he found himself drawn to (both in terms of attraction and just like, Vibes) and kind of absentmindedly internally going "hm. yes. i'll have some of that as well" until eventually he was just kind of always using he/him, agreeing with (rather than just, like, Not Correcting) people who gendered him as a man, etc. that kind of shift ended up happening hand in hand w him being gay; basically both his gender + sexuality over time went from a place of "i don't care? this doesn't mean much to me" to "oh wait. now that i've seen it in action i do have a specific niche i'd like to live in actually"

wait this just made me remember i read a thing once about a weird climbing plant that somehow gradually mimics the leaves of whatever host plant it attaches itself to. that's what glyn did with the concept of Men

[queenkoalas-corner-of-hell]

Whilst I take care of the next installment of “A Mate Reject and a Gamma” I figure I’ll take a poll from the masses to see of actually Intersex Tobirama is a good idea for Useful Blades. Important; bold is addressing fanfiction in general as well.

Before you nuke me, here’s the thought process I had. Originally, what made me think about Useful Blades was what lengths Tobirama would go to be useful and obviously I wanted it to be MadaTobi so an arranged marriage would be the call to action and has been done effectively and beautifully (love this corner of the fandom, you guys are the best) but as a (mad) scientist and a bride growing up in the period, providing an heir would be one of those things he’d consider. I could go the drama route of him pushing Madara to girls or second wives (blergh) and I might end up using briefly but the scientist genius part struck me as “if Orochimaru could do it…..” and so on. But then I thought, seals and such are possible sure, scifi tube baby too (which would be hilarious with the idea of Izuna walking down to Tobirama’s science cellar and finding glass cases of infants and freaking tf out). Sexy no jutsu and Kage Bunshin’s lovechild could also be a possibility. But then I thought, what if it was his understanding of medical science that he twisted himself? Then I thought, what if he already innately had a set to work with.

Thus, I thought, if he was intersex in a time with poor understanding genetics as a whole and had XX chromosomes but appeared “incompletely” masculine Tobi would still be raised a man and identify as such. Infertility and difficulty of getting pregnant would be interesting concepts to explore in a person driven to provide an heir. Very angsty.

Of course there’s already plenty of angst to be found in his albinism and consequential hinderances to his health. It is also a personal headcanon the man has some degree of autism or something akin to it, the man has a neural divergence for sure. So it wouldn’t be necessary but it would be an interesting thought to follow.

Chimerism was considered too since it seems like a possibility with what happened with Itama’s hair. Albino and not? Genetics are weird enough but applying to anime is madness….

Intersex Tobirama hasn’t been explored much if at all outside of the strange pseudo intersex of omegverse mpreg which… is weirdly close to the idea of a “true hermaphrodite” and fetishization of it. Granted heats and bonds and such aren’t, ya know, an actual thing so it blurs the lines for most. Could get into a whole rant about it but no…

If I did make Tobirama intersex I’d be dancing a very precarious line. Lines. XX is sexually recognized as the female chromosome set. Intersex XX Tobirama/Cis XY Madara could read as a heterosexual if not futa sort of thing. Stepping vaguely on trans territory by nature, misconstrued as homophobia, and so forth. Intersex individuals are in the political crossfire at the moment, what with the US doing whatever it is they’re doing about gender affirming care. The last thing this group needs is a salt on wounds monkey show in the form of glorified dehumanizing porn.

That being said, Actually Intersex Tobirama could be problematic as it could be beneficial. Exposing people to accurate information in the form of storytelling is an amazing way for masses to learn. Intersex representation in modern media and art is negligible at best. However because it is a story it is bound to be unrealistic. I’m also not intersex myself so conjectures made by the information I have and just human empathy wouldn’t mean it would apply to everyone across the board. The human experience is a vast one and the intersex community is vast in itself. Experiences and cultures and times all so different…

So yeah, I could dive head first and try my best, or I could leave it. I don’t care for “political correctness” as a face thing, I care more for the people that can be validated and felt seen. Or likewise, hurt by it.

But… anyway…

[once-and-future-alaskan]

A Thought on Remixing A Particular Piece of Otherwise Traditionally Uninteresting, Conventional Abrahamic Mythology in An Interesting Way.

Or: That title is way too long and poorly phrased.

While listening to Ben Caplans Plough the Shit, i realized there’s a common trend in media that bases itself on biblical stories or wildly misunderstanding christian cosmology. In these stories, the story of Adam and Eden is typically a throwaway piece of information that’s taken at face value and largely just there to introduce Lilith because apparently everyone decided she’s real I guess.

Which is weird since if you look at the bible, the story of the Garden and Adam are really not super straight forward and there’s a lot of opportunity for open interpretation of the vague and broad language. From a writers perspective, the story of the first man leaves a lot of room to question how much, if any of it,is true after so long. Also i swear to both G-d and the One Eyed Wanderer that if i see one more story with Lilith I’ll- look. She’s biblical fanfiction that combines two completely unrelated parts of the text from two seperate books and the actual reason for the double creation part of Genesis is much more interesting than some demon mother.

So anyway the actual reason I bring this up is my proposals for making Adam an interesting character, or threat, in biblically inspired fiction. I took inspiration from a loose interpretation of this specific lyric from Plough the Shit. As well as the fact that I actually quite like things like the Cainite origin of vampires in media like World of Darkness.

At last, the Supreme Maker decreed that this creature, to whom he could give nothing wholly his own, should have a share in the particular endowment of every other creature. Taking man, therefore, this creature of indeterminate image, he set him in the middle of the world and thus spoke to him: "We have given you, O Adam, no visage proper to yourself, no endowment properly your own, in order that whatever place, whatever form, whatever gifts you may, with premeditation, select, these same may you have and possess through your own judgement and decision. We have made you a creature neither of heaven nor of Earth! Neither mortal nor immortal! In order that you may, as the free and proud shaper of your own being, fashion yourself in the form you may prefer. It will be in your power to descend to the lower, brutish forms of life. You will be able, through your own judgement and decision, to rise again to the superior orders whose life is divine!"

Ok so my proposal is thusly: G-d, a being beyond human comprehension and physical form creates Adam, a physical living thing, in their image. Adam as a result is quite frankly eldritch in nature, lacking anything in the way of true gender or sexual characteristics and exists in an ever shifting, unknowable body. In this blank template state he goes on to father humanity Asexually, there is no Eve and the idea of Eve is just a failed attempt at understanding it’s origins.

From there a story could do a lot with an eldritch Adam, a silent observer of humanity. A shadow in history. The Man Who Sold The World. etc.

Alternatively you could take a much more Dark Souls approach with a concept like this, a furtive pygmy. Maybe except it becomes a horrible nightmare boss or something idk i’m not your mom. 

[vinylfox]

side tangent this is absolutely not a huge deal at all but it’s something that bothers me personally. is this weird fetishization i see sometimes of trans guys or transmasc people in general.

specifically weird posts or memes i see mutuals on twitter repost sometimes. like the spongebob (its always dat damn spongebob…) saying gary i need boypussy.

like lol? at first i thought it was flattering but im coming to realize its the same objectification fem people are subjected to, just under the guise of being progressive or accepting of gender non conformity. the reducing of actual people to genitals and body parts. its like i, as a human being with all sorts of complexities and experiences, do not matter- the only thing of value i offer is my body.

like i’ve met quite a handful of people where their treatment of transmasc folks in general is just offputting. their demeanor is friendly at first- but you realize in how they talk (and the topics they choose to discuss) that they have this weird fixation on people with transmasc bodies. boypussy this boypussy that. oh my god a man with a vagina! hummina hummina googly googly etc. it’s like they think they’re complimenting you, but all they’re doing is reducing you down to an idea, a concept, a vague thing they find sexually appealing.

i guess it all comes back to the fact that most, if not all trans people, are just kind of viewed as sexual in and of themselves. like trans women are implicitly viewed as objects of sexual desire, even if they’re literally just existing. it’s the same sort of general ideas- misogyny, sexualization of the human body- especially gender nonconforming bodies, that sort of thing.

[llycaons]

monster baru: notes as of ~halfway through

Dickinson's exploration of topics related to culture, sexuality and colonization is pretty neat to see in a fantasy series. I liked the discussion around cultural relativism, sexual fluidity, and Stakhi gender roles. a white man he may be, but careful and well-researched

I did think it was weird when baru extended sympathy to svir for the discrimination he faced as someone the reader would recognize as white, but ig it does follow the prejudices of the setting to their logical conclusion, and it makes sense that a series so involved in breaking down bioessentialism and misogyny would also challenge assumptions around white supremacy and the idea that white is the default

I kind of dislike that baru has non-sight senses/esp (?) on her blind side. I can't imagine this actually exists, but I suppose DIckinson would know

ulye xe is a GREAT character. her mannerisms and perspective are so cool to get into, and her sense of humor is subtle in a way that rules. also reminds me of lwj, actually, in that sense

I really liked the depressing bath sex scene. it was perfectly appropriate and it made a strong point about baru. also the sex scene itself was really good! hasn't been as graphic as other I've read, but I think the vagueness really works in the scene's favor

the switching POVs is still kind of confusing, but at least they're not doing it in the middle of the chapter anymore. and xy's voice is so strong, and her backstory is insane, I love it. her passion! her outlook! her commitment to the common people! I didn't realize how much she hated the ducal system. but who is XY addressing? 'my friends??'

also antiroyalist XY killing the Duke fucks. WILL THAT BE ALL YOUR GRACE

I picked up on a sense of 'tear down the ducal system' in traitor but it was never explicitly laid out. it certainly doesn't factor in baru's plans

anyway xy's 'side' is so much more complicated than just 'empire or rebel', she's a tactician who sides with the masquerade strategically in order to protect the most powerless of her people.

tain ko is so fucking cool. all the tains are honestly they rule

TAIN SHIR!!! HOLY SHIT!!!! I want her. and to see how she started...oh my god

TS and TK's backstory... 'I am not mastered'. I have chills. star wars WISHES

I love seeing more of oriati society, and the class critique thereof was super compelling.

it's nice that orientalism was so thoroughly avoided (especially compared to the dany chapters I'm forcing myself through 🤮stop talking about ~strange spices~ dany you have lived there for YEARS just eat the fucking locusts) but imo the world seems kind of small (Taranoke, Aurdwynn, Stazhi, Falcrest, Oriati, with some other peoples to the far east and west) - I would love to see more places and peoples. they all feel like vibrant, living, dynamic places that could actually exist

baru's relentless self-reflection is endlessly fascinating. she never stops questioning, either herself or others

unfortunately I still dislike the try tryhard chapter titles. DIckinson got so excited about all the new elements he wanted o incorporate and is trying to do so much at once. it feels overburdened and needlessly complex. like, tighten it up!

many many beautiful women. it continues to astonish and delight me that so many characters just continue to be women

very confused by this passage

I'm going to ask a mutual but the matricide line jut has me so baffled. how are lachta and the tain family related? why would lachta need to kill HIS mother?

it's really neat to see how Falcrest took over a different country. the weapons adapted to the situation of the place they conquer

Stakhi sounds really cool too! I want to go there!. the concept of 'a necessary king' is so neat. they're a people who don't like to be ruled, by anyone

finally I wish they hadn't used to word weed. it sounds silly and modern and informal when stuck into the language of the narration. just say cannabis

baru's crush on lao seemed like it came out of the blue and I was slightly weirded out that they were cousins, but then she clarified second cousins and honestly I met my second cousin this weekend at a family reunion and I think he's kind of hot so I can't even judge

the interrogation island is REALLY neat

I think the oriati concept of trim, and the critique of the princes, is one of the most fascinating and realistic aspect of the worldbuilding. look forward to reading more