#she just kept putting out song after song after song like longest concert I’ve ever been to I think????

[dany36]

RIP to England but My Queen still lives and she Sold Out 👑

[all-things-fic]

Somewhere Only We Know

A/N - Hello, you lovely lot! Hope you are all keeping well in these utterly shit Covid times. Who would’ve thought that we would still be here in December?! Please see my offering for @goldenbluesuit​‘s Christmas Fic Challenge. Hope I’ve done a bit of justice with this piece.

I can remember Katie texting me telling me about the challenge, and I’ll admit I was given first dibs and now I’m absolutely shitting myself because I’ve seen all the brillaint entries so far and I’m not sure I really cut the mustard with this piece but I’m proud of myself for being able to put a solid 70% of this together in just one day (that one day being today).

Anyway, I hope you enjoy! Katie has done a brilliant job and I know how grateful she is towards anyone who has joined the challenge or supported by reading/sharing etc.... I need to stop rambling... Okay, thank you for sticking with me as always and happy reading! .x

***

The last thing you remembered actually reading in the group chat was “make sure you have your wellies”. You were glad that you remembered that part at the very least.

Winds whipped around you as you buried your face further into your cream roll neck cable knit jumper, all but hidden underneath your tobacco borg teddy coat that someone had already likened to Macklemore.

Nothing like being back home with your closest and oldest friends.

Mud squelched under your feet as you walked in line with two of your oldest girl friends, eyes looking over the four males in front of you as they led the way over the grassy hills.

There had been zero planning on what today’s events would bring. It was quite clear that the seven of you just wanted to be reunited with the country air and wind bitten cheeks.

It was nice. How simple it was. On the surface at the very least. That was until you zoned in on the little things. 

Like his laugh. The same laugh that always carried somehow and it seemed like the wind was making it that much more prominent than usual today.

There was no denying, he had this glow about him. Even from the back of him. You felt silly for thinking it, but it was true. It was in the way he held himself as he attacked the grassy hills with his feet clad wellies and brown trousers.

Life had changed a lot in over a decade. Christ, had it been that long? You’d all gone from baby teenagers to fully fledged adults. The age range of your friendship differing slightly, the odd person here and there slightly older than a couple of people in the group.

Nonetheless, many of the experiences had been the same. The big job offers, and the even bigger promotions. The heartbreaks, regardless of their prominence or lack of, had been the felt the same. The flirtation between some of you sparked probably a bit more so now with a finesse that didn’t have you rolling your eyes but rather leaning into it. 

Four out of seven of you were single. Jack and Jonny were virtually married off, however neither of them were with their partners this year with both deciding to spend Christmas at home and New Years with their significant others. Alice was still loved up and going strong with her fella, as was Grace who you hadn’t heard a peep from as she constantly checked her phone to see when the person she was besotted with finally arrived up North thanks to West Midlands Trains pulling into Crewe. 

So that left Will, you and Harry. Harry who had  quite publicly made it known that he was single. Well, according to your Mum he had, in several interviews. Including the one that she had described as an ‘incredibly relaxing watch and nice background noise to my Sunday evening brew and ironing session’. 

That was a strange one for you, his honesty. In earlier years of friendship, he always seemed quite aloof. Like he was keeping his options open. Guarded in a way that frustrated at least 75% of the friendship group, in the nicest way possible. You knew that was a contradiction but any annoyance came from a good place. 

You remembered one night in 2014 when he wouldn’t quite give you a straight answer over tequila shots whether he was shagging someone or not. You also remember the way he’d been pulled away from you tactfully by Alice that night when she sensed how you were about to blow up at his lackadaisical attitude. 

The same had been felt in 2016. Not so much in 2018, but you weren’t single then so maybe you just didn’t care. 

2019 was significantly different though.

See the thing was, you knew him now. Like, knew knew him. 

Some would think it was a lapse of judgment, a reading that you would agree upon given what had happened two days prior if ever prodded about it publicly.

Others would vehemently disagree. Stating how long any sort of energy between the two of you had been bubbling for a number of years. 

Looking back you couldn’t even understand why you’d attended his show. You lived in Camden and it made sense, but that’s where the sense stopped. Even the ways he had reached out had been one of the most random messages you’d received from him

There was no context, just a simple ‘I’m playing the Electric Ballroom and there’s tickets waiting for you if you want ‘em.’

And the thing was, you loved that venue. The grungy-ness of it all. The way you had stuck to the floor while trying to dance along to the likes of The Hives and Kings of Leon when seeing them playing there, basking in your sweaty happiness. 

But the stickiness of the floor and sweatiness of the room didn’t compare to the stickiness and sweatiness you later found yourself partaking in as Harry took you from behind over the side of his couch. 

A shiver rolled through you at the thought, one that you would blame on the December bitter chill because it was a secret. One that neither of you had mentioned since it happened on Thursday night, or to be technically correct the early hours of Friday morning. 

He’d been good. Of course he had been.

He had that way about him that night that pulled you under a false sense of endeared security. From his dimpled smile to gleaming eyes. He was happy. 

And the way he had shone as he found you on the balcony had warmed you like nothing you had known in the longest time.

It caused you to forget about the worry that had laden you limbs as you turned up at 9.13pm to the wooden doors of the building, wondering how many songs he was in to the set as you convinced yourself he would start at 9.00pm.

As you’d been ushered over to a clear box window and uttered your name to a dorky looking man wearing a tracksuit pull over and watched him handover a white envelope through the circle hatch. 

You stood in the dark, next to two much younger girls who enjoyed the way his glances lingered over at their side. Eyes had found Gemma in the opposite corner of the balcony, her dancing and singing with some recognisable faces mainly more so because you had seen them on social media.

You, however, kept yourself to yourself. Until you were anchored in the tightest hug from Gemma that you had ever felt from her and swayed from side to side as she made it known how pleased she was to see you once the concert was over. 

That familiarity had been nice. The vibrancy of nostalgia consuming you in your entirety. 

Watching him work a room when he finally entered the after party was a sight to behold, in his navy blue pinstripe suit and yellow ‘I’m gonna die lonely’ t-shirt. 

He wasn’t. Gonna die lonely, that is. 

He glided so smoothly from one person to the next, spilling a drink down himself in the process you’d seen (and later felt when your hand clung to the fabric of his t-shirt as you kissed), making time for everyone in his own unique way.

Big eyes followed you over Gemma’s shoulder when he had finally found himself within your circle and hugged his sister once more that evening. They were hard to read but also openly filled with a glimmer of hope as he dropped his gaze to see what you were wearing.

And when he approached you, he hugged you in a way that managed to pull you into the darkened corner of the dingy space. Spinning your body to keep your face concealed from any prying eyes. 

He revealed to you how he didn’t think you were going to turn up, scanning you with his gaze as he spoke. You did the same, a bit taken aback by just how attractive you were finding him. He had always been handsome but the aura he gave off, made your fingers itch to have him closer to you. 

Words ran away from you that night as he begged and pleaded with you to tell him what your favourite song had been. Based on first impressions, which the show has been, then Canyon Moon and Watermelon Sugar had smothered you and given you no other option but to pick them.

If he were to ask you now you’d probably say To Be So Lonely, thanks to the drive home being longer than originally thought and said album being your choice of road trip music. 

Forget Driving Home For Christmas, nothing slapped more than one of your closest friends admitting to being an arrogant son of a bitch. 

After your chat, he mingled some more but Harry was always tactile and that night had been no different. He veered conversations with people you had never seen before to take place by the zone that you all occupied.

He actively kept his back against yours, allowing the faintest of touches and brushing of arms - sometimes hands too if he dropped them down heavily enough with his arms as he spoke - to entice and create a spark. 

You were kept late enough to miss the last tube. Battery dangerously low on your phone that you didn’t know if a transaction with Uber would be worth a try. 

Jumping into the same car as him had been easy. His soft and tired eyes findings yours in the cab as he leant his head back against the headrest in the back seat and let his lips tip upwards in an expression of tenderness that had you melting in your seat. 

“‘S been a while since we’ve both been a bit pissed in the back of a taxi,” he mused, pushing his fallen locks out of his eyes to ensure his view of you wasn’t obscured. “Come an’ cuddle me like you used to do when we went out a’ home and were worse for wear.”

Falling into his side was almost second nature, eyes closing as you let your forehead rest against his jawline and let his worn in cologne fill you senses and scatter your judgment.

You don’t even remember how you ended up kissing that night. A mixture of confessions about missing each other and praise of how good you both were in your own ways. The sound of his whispered, “are you coming home wi’me?” against your lips an offer too good for you to refuse as you sat pressed into his side and half in his lap. 

The giggles that night, around dramatic shushes as you tripped and shuffled from the car to his front door were almost haunting in your memory as he tried to chastise you around spluttered laughter about being respectful of his neighbours. 

Getting the key in the lock proved unchallenging -  one of the better analogies aligned to your memories and latter sexual endeavours - as you slipped into the house. He enjoyed watching the way you walked ahead of him into his home, not realising how much he needed that visual of seeing how well you fit in. 

While time seemed to slow in that moment, movements desperately sought the opposite. Hands gripped and clawed like their lives depended upon it. 

Looking back now, both he and you wished it hadn’t happened the way it did. Skirt lifted and over the side of his couch. Teeth clashing and hips knocking.

It had been every inch a drunken fumble. A first meeting slightly cheapened but wanted nonetheless. Only made even cheaper by the hush-hush concealing of it ever occurring. 

But a secret it was and a secret it would remain. 

And oh how you wished you had a pillow you could press you face into right now and scream, this time for an entirely different reason. Unlike that night. 

“Not seen a sign of any deer yet, mate,” you heard a voice break you out of your indulgence of recollecting past events. Harry was the worst at wanting to get a reaction. 

“Christ, have a bit of patience would yer?”

You smiled at the bickering, just like it always was as the River Dane could be heard in the distance somewhere as you walked. If you listened really close, that is. 

Lifting your eyes, your smile lingered as you watched Harry spin his body around and let his hands get lost in the massive pockets of his parka. He walked backwards holding your gaze softly with his eyes twinkling before he gently rolled them at the overreaction and impatience of your friends.

He seemed pleased that you’d enjoyed his teasing as you once again hid you smile into your jumper. 

You’d be alright.

***

You heard giggles and screams ahead of you as your friends stumbled in the dark and messed about as you got closer to the viaduct. This place or the people didn’t change, and at times while it filled you with a warm nostalgia, it could be heavily jarring.

A soft and lazy smile pulled at your lips as you felt his heavy forearm lightly tug you closer to him, his lips finding your hair. And then there was Harry. 

“Think we should go this way m’self,” Harry mumbled, the nudge of his hips against yours had you stumbling slightly in your heels away from the direction of your friends and somewhere completely different. 

“And why’s that?” You turned your face slightly, cheeks warm and flushed thanks to the mixture of alcoholic beverages; eyes glazed as they lifted up to look at him. 

“Cause you never would’ve let me when I was sixteen,” he admitted. 

“You didn’t ask.”

“‘M askin’ now.” 

With slow blinking eyes, you looked at his own unfocused vision. A soft shine to his skin, hair blowing gently against his forehead. The softest of smiles tilted at your lips.  

“On yer go,” he nudged you forward, this time more so with his crotch and his hands, which wrapped around your hips to help steer you. Harry was met with only a small amount of resistance from you as you split off from your friends and turned in the different direction. 

You bit back your laugh, dropping your head slightly as you felt your heels started to sink into the grass as you walked. Harry was level with you when you sunk down noticing the way you legs slightly gave way, a soft chuckle omitting from his throat as he asked, “You alrigh’?”

“I’m sinking in these bloody things,” you grumbled, pulling your heel from the grass and trying to place the sole of your shoe onto the ground beneath you first. 

“So much for no’ being able to take the country out o’ the girl. London’s changed yer, swear it.”

Shaking your head, you cut your eyes to give him a harsh stare for his wind up. His amused expression lit a fire in you like no other. He really wasn’t one to talk though, was he? 

“Gi’me your hand ‘ere,” he held his out to you, quickly cupping it when you handed it over and pulled it under his bent elbow. “Remind me again who’s idea this was, eh?”

He didn’t need reminding, he had been one of the keen instigators for the whole jaunt down Twemlow Viaduct. It usually was him, or Jack. The two of them often reminiscing on times they had both raided their parents' alcohol cupboards and managed to sneak out with some dusty bottle that held a liquor that tasted out of date and stale, and if not that then, cheap. 

“‘S still fucking freezing down ‘ere, in’it?” He asked, lifting his left hand up to his mouth and blowing against it to try and get some feeling back into his fingers.

“We’re so close to the river, I don’t know why you’d expect anything different?”

“Is this why everyone was always so insistent on necking anything with over 11% alcohol in it when we came down ‘ere as kids?”

“Probably,” you softly laughed. 

“‘S a bit different now though innit?”

“Oh, I’m not so sure,” you started to correct him, shrugging your hand out from under his elbow and reaching for your bag. Quickly fumbling with the clasp, you lifted up the quilted flap and managed to pull out the stainless steel hip flask.

Harry cackled a harsh laugh, his eyes crinkling as he slowly let his laughter die down and softly let his joy wash over his features. “Impressive. Gone all proper on me.”

“You know I haven’t,” you held his eyes watching as he nervously cupped at the back of his neck for a short while, a gentle bite down of his bottom lip, as you quickly uncapped the item and held it out to him. He looked like he needed the courage.  You continued, “We’re just a bit more refined, that and we earn a good living. Some more than others, and by some I mean you.” 

He held his hand up towards you with an amused grin at your comment. “You first, ‘s yours after all.” 

Lifting the item and knocking back your head, you swallowed the whiskey with a small grimace, before offering it to Harry once more. This time he accepted, his right hand making light work of taking the item from your hands and sipping at the contents.

His face wasn’t as contorted as your’s when he swallowed, a fan of the chosen beverage if needs must. “‘S the proper stuff, tha’ is,” he commented with a quick lick of his lips before continuing, “Come a long way from sneaking the bottles of dusty Blossom Hill from the back of the cupboard.”

“Don’t know about that,” you smiled, taking the item and pushing it back into your bag. “I’d still drink if, if it were on offer.”

“‘M sure Mum’s got a bottle or two going at home?”

“Is that your way of asking me to go home with you?” You paused. “Again.”

Harry remained silent at your words. Both you and he knew it was going to happen. A mixture of sparks and lovelorn, lingering glances was enough to make anyone both want to give up, while also giving a burning confidence usually unknown. 

Neither of you expected it would be you who started the conversation, however. 

“It is, ‘f it’s gonna work. ‘M not sure I could wait any longer t’be’onest wi’yer.“

Laughing, you reached up to push at his shoulder. He always knew exactly what to say, but no way was he going to make a laughing stock of the whole thing. “Oh, give over,” you spoke, harshly swallowing when he kept your hand against the thick cable knit black jumper he had on. “You’ve made it this far, thus far just fine.” 

“‘M not playin’,” he whispered, hand gently curling around your own and lifting it up to press against his face. His cheeks were warm underneath the cooler hands, despite the cold night whipping around you both and your mind quickly wondered if he was just as embarrassed for his lack of acknowledgment as you had been. “Homes nice, you’re nicer.”

“I thought we weren’t going to talk about it,” you let your soft voice get taken by the wind.

“An’ what gave you tha’ impression?”

He did. He gave you that impression. By not mentioning it. By treating you how he always did.

“You.”

“Me?” Harry responded, indignantly, blowing out a sigh that had his cheeks puffing out underneath your hand. “‘M not doing a very good job then am I? I can’t keep m’eyes off o’you. ‘S not my fault you don’t bloody notice ‘em.”

But you had noticed them. 

His eyes, gaze following your every move, near enough. Stupid little touches. Glances of approval. Not just now, but from years before. 

Treating you how he always did.

Oh, treating you how he always did.

Bringing your eyes back to his figure, you saw the way his gaze darted and nervousness dragged at his features. A frown began to set itself between his eyebrows from worry. 

“Changes everything.”

Running his tongue along his teeth, Harry pursed his lips. “Everythin’ has changed, changed a long time ago an’all.” 

You dropped your hand down, it now massaging against the back of his neck and shoulder as you felt the tension of his body radiating through his clothes. Under the dim moonlight and the odd spotlight that had been added to the viaduct with each passing year for safety, Harry exhumed everything anyone would want in a boyfriend. He was soft, and so bloody gorgeous. Not just because he was personification of an almost six foot tall string of handsomeness, but his character did the talking for him.

He knocked the door before he walked into a room, for example. Who really did that kind of thing anymore? 

But you could also still see the heartbreak that lingered, albeit not as strong as it once was, it was still there. And that was problematic and scary. To be on the receiving end of it. Not that you would hold it against him, because you had been him at one point too. At many points in fact. 

When the two of you had shagged, because let’s face it that is exactly what it had been, while a sense of familiarity in the person was prevalent it was definitely overruled by the desire to just hit a euphoric high that if hit right could not be topped. 

Familiar overruled in other aspects, and it wasn’t to be brushed away. But was familiarity a mask that would slip sooner rather than later? Was it the start and the end?

The both of you experienced similarities in your life that could not be matched by the friends in your friendship group. London had chewed you up and spat you out, ruthlessly so. While rewarding you with long hours but fat pay cheques, careers that catapulted you to new heights and enabled you to see parts of the world that two country kids (which in one way you were) could never have imagined. 

Sure Harry’s had been on a much, much larger scale - you would not ever deny that - but you no longer fit in. 

And neither did he. 

This was a place that only the two of you knew. A place where you watched those around you fall in love and have the time to do so. A place where your friend's happiness was created a lot easier than it wasn’t and allowed a sense of success to weave its way in, through the most unexpected of happenings.

Not a place where you found happiness in your work because there was less of a space for happiness to blossom elsewhere. Not really. Not like you; both of you. 

Understanding was vital. 

This had been a place you knew like the back of your hand. A place that had you feeling the earth beneath your feet, fresh air in your lungs and had at times made it so you found yourself sitting by a river and finding yourself feeling complete. 

Yet looking over at the almost 26 year old, that just wasn’t the case anymore. 

And for once you didn’t feel alone. 

The sound of the odd piece of cobbled pavement underneath Harry shoes, buried beneath overgrown grass and plants, broke you from your thoughts, as you watched him kick at the ground and scuff his shoes.

He sighed, head tilted back before he knocked it to the side and caught your eyes. A small scoffed laugh left his lips as he shook his head and dropped his gaze to his feet.

“‘S it fucked?”

You hummed, a small frown lacing your features.

“Fucked it, haven’t I? Fuckin’- idiot-“ he breathed out a noise as he clenched his teeth, one that wasn’t quite a growl but enough to let you know he was agitated. Only strengthened by how tight his jaw became. 

Before you could even think, the back of your hand gently brushed against the pulsing hinge of his jaw. Muscles taut as you tried to soothe him in a way that your mind was screaming was far too intimate.

You didn’t want him having any internal battle about right and wrong. Not when you had both taken the same steps to get here. 

“Thought it was just meant as a one time thing,” you admitted. “Like you needed it, and I needed it. Was what it needed to be at the time. Bit rough, bit sloppy-“

You cringed are the use of the word. Wanting the ground to swallow you in a weird fashion. You should be able to talk open and honestly with someone who you had known longer than hadn’t. 

“Rough?“ Harry swallowed audibly, his face fallen. “That’s not-“ 

His eyes held an emotion similar to sorrow at the mention of the word. “That’s not the impression I wanted to give you.” 

“We were both drunk, it happens.” 

“Not with me it doesn’t. Not when it’s me, wanting to be wi’you.”

“I mean I was into it if that helps anything?” 

“Were yer?”

You looked at him from the corner of your vision, watching his lips try to fight a smile as you rolled yours into your mouth to not give yourself away. You knew what you were trying to do by speaking those words aloud but you wished you hadn’t. Awkward breathy laughs were shared by the two of you as you held his eyes. 

“Was I?”

You hummed in agreement to answer his question, letting your smile dance along your lips now and watching as Harry’s dimples started to show. His expression was youthful, slightly smug. 

“Good t’know.”

***

Finishing saying your goodbyes to your friends and ignoring their suggestive expression because ‘Harry was stopping as an extra pair of hands’, you shut the heavy wooden door and reached up to close the deadbolt lock at the top. Shortly after, you let your feet drop as you stopped standing on your tiptoes and pressed your forehead against the door. 

The silence of the pub was always a strange one to you. A place that was usually thriving, whether it was just your friends, or your parents friends. When the lights were turned out, it was actually quite a lonely place. Regardless of growing up around this sort of industry your entire life and having parents as publicans nothing was more depressing than an empty bar, lifeless and nothing like it was intended.

A suggested lock-in from Jack, who managed to interrupt both yours and Harry’s conversation earlier had not been a bad shout after all. You knew it meant that you would have to deal with the fallout with it being Christmas Eve, but it wasn’t very often that you found yourself in the setting. 

Turning to move from the door, you almost jumped out of your skin when you heard the opening of a familiar Lily Allen song start to play over the speakers. 

Harry emerged from the corner of the pub that housed the jukebox, slowly rubbing his hands together before he wordlessly picked up the scattered pint glasses that had remained on one of the tables that had been missed by the staff on the evening shift. His eyes glanced over at you, as you stood with a hand to your chest.

This wicked smile and gleam washed over his face as he paused his movement. “Did I scare yer?”

“Do you not think it’s a bit loud?”

He wrinkled his nose at you, a soft shake of his head no, to answer your question. 

“‘S your fave innit?” He asked, head nudging to where the jukebox was now hidden.

With a small smile you nodded, “Prefer the Keane version in all honesty.”

“Don’t have it in the bloody jukebox though, d’yer? Can’t like it that much.”

Your smile deepened at his exclaim and how prominent his accent sounded as he spoke, the small clink of the glasses he was holding only heard if you really zoned in. 

“Where d’yer want these?” He asked, holding up the five pint glasses he had collected. “Behind t’bar?”

Humming, you nodded and watched as he weaved his way through the tables to you. You frowned as he got closer, not understanding why he hadn’t bypassed you completely.

Once he was close enough to you, you watched as he reached for what you knew to be your own glass of wine that was almost finished. 

“Fancy the rest of this or can it go too?”

Looking at him and down to the glass, you gently wrapped your hand around it and brought the lip to your mouth. You knocked the item back quickly, swallowing the rest of your wine, before handing over the now empty glass back to Harry.

“Good girl,” he joked, light laughter lacing each word. “Sit yourself down.”

Wearing an amused and quizzical expression, you let yourself sink down into the wooden chair. Resting your chin on your hand, you spun slightly in your seat to keep your eyes on Harry as he placed the glasses down and lifted the hatch so he could step behind the bar. 

With your free hand, you started to tap the worn beer coaster labelled with the Cheshire Brewhouse logo against the table. Part of you hated how Harry had a knack for anything, including knowing his way around a bar. 

He busied himself with collating the glasses once more as you let your eyes take in the surroundings you had known, loved and even grown out of. 

Your parent’s pub was cosy and friendly. A truly 

classic and quintessential British village pub, featuring open fires, bookcases found in the very far corner or the jukebox in the other, lots of old oak and a really pleasant garden with benches for the summat and heaters for the winter. You know the kind that had its regulars that had kids who had seen each other grow up.

The bar was the centre of the pubs house, with an extensive array of whiskies amongst many other delights. A nice range of local ales and a well-balanced, great quality list of wines on offer designed (which you would be taste testing if the service hadn’t decided to take a break) to complement the food menus designed daily by a team of chefs who all have a passion for great cooking using fresh, seasonal and local ingredients.

It looked as Christmassy as Christmas could get, with a real tree which was locally sourced from one of the many surrounding farms and traditionally decorated with golds and reds. Twinkly lights shone, not only on the trees but as part of the garland that was hung above the bar each year, much to the annoyance of your Dad and the delight of your Mum.

Slowly dragging your eyes back to the bar, you watched Harry as he poured you another glass of white wine and started to recap the bottle. He must’ve felt your eyes on him, his gaze meeting yours almost immediately. 

“Service is a bit slow,” you jibed, once you knew he was with you. “Going to ruin the reputation of a fine establishment.”

His chuckle was breathy in response, but warmed you through as he turned his back and pushed his tumbler glass up against the device at the bottom of the Glenfiddich distilled malt whiskey, not once but twice going for a double. 

“Helping yourself to the stock now, as well.” 

“‘M sure your Dad won’t mind,” he responded, twisting his body back around to reach for your own glass and place it onto a tray that sat along the bar top. “In fact he’d probably make a comment about how it’d put hairs on m’chest.”

You laughed, unrestrained, knowing just how right he had been with that comment. 

Over the otherside of the room, Harry smiled and shushed you as he walked closer, easily holding the tray with your drinks upon it. “Being a bit loud,” he taunted as he slid the tray down to the oak table.

“Oh, now you’re concerned about the noise.”

With his hand against the back of the chair which was currently housing your outstretched legs, you felt him start to wobble the seat to give you a warning. 

“Hang on,” you said, “Plenty of other chairs.”

“This one’s mine,” he responded.

Wanting to roll your eyes but deciding not to, you let your legs drop down and gave the seat back to Harry. Once he was comfortable and he’d taken your drink off the tray, he gestured with his right hand.

Not entirely focused, he had to do the ‘come hither’ motion a couple of times before you finally cottoned on. He was willing to let you put your legs on his lap instead, while he may have taken the seat it didn’t mean he wanted to take away your comfort.

No sooner had your legs been raised to rest against his tan washed velvet corduroy trousers, was he fiddling with the buckle of your stiletto sandals.

“Got mud everywhere,” you commented, wiggling your toes that were painted a festive red and inspecting the little dots of dirt that were splattered against your skin, as Harry dropped the first shoe to the floor and quickly worked on the second. “Dread to think what they smell like.”

“Smell alrigh’ from ‘ere,” he mused, smirk faint but glaring obvious in his tone of voice as he threw a quick and mischievous glance at you. As you elongated your foot against his thighs, the tips of your toes were just about able to press into his thick jumper to try and jab at him for his comment. 

Before you were able to put any sort of force behind your action, Harry’s hand clamped down around the top of your foot causing your eyes to snap up away from his hand and up to his eyes.

There he sat watching you, top two teeth pressed into his bottom lip keep his smile at bay. Releasing his lips slowly, his whispered threat left his throat, “I will tickle.”

You tried to fidget away but to no avail. With a whined laugh, you frowned as Harry goaded you by slowly raising his eyebrows. “You wouldn’t dare.”

“Try me.”

You had tried him. 

Truth be told you wanted to again.

If he wanted to.

Reaching for your wine, you took a hefty sip and let the silence swallow you both. Harry, who kept his hand on your foot and his fingers dancing gently against the top, let his head fall back awkwardly against the hardwood. His head dropped to the side taking in his surroundings and their familiarity. 

“Do you ever get tired of coming back?” 

You hummed, sure you had misheard due to the way the blood was rushing around your ears. He turned to look at you, all double chin and puffy cheeks.

“Of everything being the same, but different?”

His whispers captivated you, hushed confessions not quite meant for anyone else but his own mind yet spilling from him with such an ease that he did nothing to fight them. 

“I’ll admit, I come home for other people. Not for me.”

“People?”

“Mum, Dad,” you paused. “You.”

His smile deepened. His chin knocking down to his chest, his eyes looking up at you from underneath his curling hair from being caught in the moist winter evening just hours before.

“You can stop looking at me like that.”

“Like what?”

“Like you did three nights ago.”

Harry breathed in deeply, his nostrils flaring and his chest expanding. A lick of his lips, before his mouth dropped to sit slightly agape. 

“What if I don’t wan’to? What if I want t’look at yer like this all the time?”

You found yourself unable to respond, nose burying itself into your wine glass as you pressed your lips against the cool outside to try and hide your burning smile. 

His lips curled lightly, before he breathed a laugh once and gently shook your foot with his hand. “Eh? Come ‘ere-“

“Harry,” you breathed.

“C’mon, c’mere. ‘S room for more than just your feet.”

If it wasn’t for the creak of your chair as you slowly started to push yourself out of it, you wouldn’t have consciously been aware of how you were making your way to him. 

His body relaxed, somehow managing to become closer to horizontal than sitting upright in his seat, as he peered as you walking the short distance over to him. 

With his legs widened, he pressed his face into your side now that you were close enough. His nose inhaled the familiar scent of your perfume which was only faint now due to the other senses and scents it had mixed with throughout the evening.

Rolling his face out of your body, he knocked his head back and pressed his chin where his face had been. The face you showed him was worn with worry, an expression he did not want to meet.

“‘S wrong?”

His ask was lazy. Not wanting to dig deep and know. What if he didn’t like what he found? 

“We know how this is going to end.”

“Do we?” He prodded. His eyes moved over your features quickly before they partly disappeared to him, thanks to your curtain of hair which slowly fell down.

His hand reached up, desperately brushing it away and cupping at the back of your head as best as he could while he remained seated. 

“How’s that? Tell me.”

“Same, but different.” 

You knew you shouldn’t use his words, not in a way that could be considered against him, but they - in the most ambiguous of ways - described everything perfectly. 

“Not if I have my way.” 

His words were almost lost against your stomach as he pressed his face against you once more and wrapped his hands around you; sweaty, nervous palms pressing to the backs of your thighs. 

“Same, but better.”

Harry guided you down to his lap, his lips somehow managing to remain pressed into stomach, or your chest, or your clavicle, as your face became level with his. 

“Different, but better.” 

He kissed against your cheek slowly, nose nudging at your skin as he willed for you to relax against him. “I don’t know how you like it, like this,” he whispered in confession. “Show me?”

A puff of air left your lips as you turned to look at him with hooded eyes. His mouth was closer to yours than you originally thought, corners of lips brushing as you slightly pulled away. 

When your lips met, it was in the softest of pecks that trembled under your nerves. Both sets of eyes looking back at each other as you innocently engaged. 

If you were to take your eyes away from him in any way, you would notice those fluffy curls of his falling over his forehead and the lightest dusting of red blush making itself known against his cheeks and the tops of his ears.

He felt like a school boy, lost and clumsy. The kid who was once again flicking paper at you in science class just so he could pull a face at you over something your teacher was saying to get you to laugh. 

Mouths hovering over each other, your breathing mixed, as Harry nodded to you slightly. You pressed your lips to his once more, feeling the way he gradually opened up to you, warmed and softened underneath the puckering of your mouth against his. 

His hands, that slightly trembled, smoothed over your hips trying to pull your body so that it was more so flush against his. You moaned softly, your hands running over his jumper covered shoulders, fingers digging and pulling at the material just below the nape of his neck. 

The chair beneath you moved lightly against the floor, not quite a scrape but a dull drag. Neither of you broke the kiss, but his hands against you allowed fingers to dig in to hold you steady to him so if you were to fall from where you were sitting, he still had you. 

His lips slowed, moving to press against your cheeks again as he panted and his warmth breath bounced off your skin. “Think I got it,” he heaved. 

“Do you?”

Harry hummed his ‘yea’, before pressing his lips so tenderly to your chin and the underside of your jaw. He felt how you swallowed heavily, throat dry from the way your mouth hung open and your neck further exposed itself as you lolled your head back. 

You were falling further and further back, finding it hard to stay upright as he devoured you and made you weaker with each pulling kiss. His groans were needy, muffled and making your ache. While yours were silent and making his desperate to pull something from you. To build is confidence in that he was doing something right, you liked it this way too. 

Hands fumbled and dragged upwards at your skirt, faintly aware now how it was similar - if not the same one - to the garment you wore to his show. 

“Gonna take this off properly,” he mumbled, feeling the way your hips moved slightly from his hands to roll over him. 

“You don’t have to-“

“No?” 

Your voices were rushed as you spoke to each other, barely audible but loud enough all the same. His head was knocked back slightly as you hovered over him and you found yourself admiring his blissed out face even only in the lead up.

This was a sight that you hadn’t received last time, and if you had your way it was one you were going to greedily enjoy in all its glory.

Like watching the way his eyes closed and he softly grinned, the left side of his teeth started to show as the one side of his face reacted first while your hands blindly moved to lift up his jumper and the white tee he had on underneath, to allow you to find the button of his corduroys.

“What ya doing?”

“Nothing,” you mused. 

He pulled a face, the kind that down turned his lips, eyebrows raised and head slightly tilted to the side. The kind that had you smiling. 

“Not trying to get m’trousers around m’ankles for a second time within a week then?”

You giggled. “No.”

“Please do.”

A low moan left you as you pressed your forehead to his jaw and dropped your eyes. Your hands slowly started to pull at the brass button and pop it open before seeking out the zip thanks to his desperate plea, encouraging you to continue. 

Hands quickly sought out the waistband of the trousers and gently pulled at the item. From the way that you were sat, you knew there was no way you were doing to make them budge.

“Stand up fo’ me,” he mumbled, quickly helping you get off his lap so that he could make light work of his clothing and pull down his trousers and underwear. 

His bare bum made easy contact with the cushion leather beneath him, eyes carefully watching you as your hands moved to underneath your skirt. 

The fabric of your underwear slipped so easily down your legs, his eyes just about caught the sight of them as they pooled against your ankles and you kicked them away. 

Legs pressed together, you slowly untucked the v-necked blouse you had chosen and pulled it over your head. Wearing nothing but a fancy black bra, and a tight little skirt you hastily snatched for your wine and took a hefty gulp.

You could feel his eyes on you, a gruff groan catching in the back of his throat and when you finally turned your eyes from where they had been looking down at your heaving chest and how great this bra made your boobs look, causing him to move his hand down to start playing with himself. 

His name left your lips in a breathy gasp, causing you to look up quite surprised at the find of his right hand gently tugging at his hard length.

“Keepin’ me waitin’,” he groaned, his left hand sloppily reached for the back of the collar of his jumper and tee, pulling the item roughly over his head.

“Fuck sake,” he mumbled under his breath, agitated that he was unable to get both items of in one go.

“Smooth.”

Harry stared up at you with a playful squint, before he gently fell back and moved the chair as he did so, the dull scrape heard once more. 

And if you didn’t know he was flushed before, when you first kissed, you were definitely aware now. His eyes were blown out and hungry as they devoured you. Hair wildly haphazard before he let go of himself with a soft slap of his skin and harshly pushed his fingers through it.

“‘S it still a couple of quid for a strip of three,” his words brought you back to him. This smugness radiated off of him as he groaned and leaned forward to push his trousers down all of the way. Over his vans and socked feet, before he toed them off as well be harshly pulled at his white sport socks. 

You didn’t even need for him to explain what he meant, staying silent as you watched his hands tug at his corduroys from the floor and retrieve his wallet. As his fingers moved around to find a couple of quid, the jangle of the coins was taunting. 

One leg crossed over the other, you swayed and found yourself blushing when he looked up at you once he’d managed to find enough money and then some. With his wallet thrown on the table, he stood proudly from the seat and closed the short gap between your both.

Leaning forward he easily took your lips with his own before pulling away. With his face still close to yours he whispered, “Promise not to look at my arse.”

He didn’t hang around long enough for your reply, instead turning away and brazenly giving you all the time you would ever need to admire him, his fantastic bum and his hairy legs before he opted for a jog-walk type of thing, suddenly conscious that he was absolutely walking around naked from the waist down in a pub owned by your parents. 

While you waited you took a quick pull from his whiskey, needing the heftier burn for Dutch courage. Nervousness returned when you heard the endings of what you believed to be Harry whistling. 

“Machine ate all m’fuckin’ change,” he grumbled, regardless of the twinkle in his eye at the strip of overpriced condoms he had managed to score from the men’s bathroom. “‘S Durex. Business must be booming, your Dad’s definitely gone up in the world.” 

“Please don’t talk about my Dad.”

He smiled brightly before he reached for your face with one hand and pulled you towards him mumbling his ‘sorry’s’ against your lips as he gave you several kisses in quick succession. 

His other arm loosely wrapped around your back and pulled you with him as he walked backwards and slowly lowered himself back onto his previous seat. The chair creaked as you joined him, slipping into his lap and feeling the way he was smiling now.

Pulling away from your kiss, he quickly tore away one of the condoms allowing the others to fall without much care to the floor. Teeth took a hold of the foil-like packaging and he tore it not so elegantly with his eagerness.

With his cock nestled in the crease of his own thigh now, the heat radiating from it matched your own agonising yearning. Scooting back to give him space, you heard him groan as he gently rolled the condom down onto himself. Eyes looking up just in time to see him knocking his head back and breathing deeply through nose. The foil-like packaging was back in between his teeth once more as his hands were otherwise preoccupied.

Slowly your hand reached up to take it from his mouth, feeling some playful resistance as Harry continued to hold it in his teeth. His eyes were open and boyishly sincere, as you tugged at the item and he finally released it when you lightly laughed. 

“Gi’me a kiss.”

Obliging him, you leant forward and slotted your mouths together a lot easier than you had done at the start of the night. A heat built easily between the two of you, as Harry gave you his tongue and you felt the flex of his jaw under your hand as he worked your mouths together.

He was eager, his hands tightening on your waist before he growled when he understood he had to grab handfuls of skirt before he could cup your backside. But when his skin met yours and you ground down onto his lap, the groan that left him was the most animalistic sound imaginable. 

The frown your face fell into showed your desire to whimper, as he kept you atop him and marvelled in the way you writhed, both from satisfaction and keenness at the pressure of his cock against you. 

“Can I have you again?” He asked, the startings of sweaty hair being pushed off your face. His eyes peered at you, searching for his answer as you seemed to be able to do nothing but pant and look back at him yearningly. “Are you letting me?”

You dragged your fingers down his t-shirt covered torso and lifted it slightly just to see the quiver of his stomach as pulled you onto him once more. 

“Like this?” you voiced, meekly.

“‘F this is what you like then, yea’”, he breathed into your mouth, hands shifting your pliant body. “Is this what you want?”

You wordlessly nod, mouth falling open in a breathy gasp when he managed to move you so he sat so enticingly at your entrance. He was teasing both yourself and him, wanting to keep you both on the edge. 

Harry blinked a few times as he looked at you, and you revelled in the way he couldn’t seem to concentrate. His hands held your flesh tightly, fingertips dipping into the skin of your bum cheeks as he gently guided you down.

An unattractive and dull, quite strangled noise, left your throat as you let your forehead fall against his temple. Eyes falling down you see the cups of your bra fall slack, you felt his hands softly gliding over your shoulder blades and shoulders. 

He rid you of your bra, hands moving to your chest to squeeze your breasts. His jaw fell slack when you found yourself sitting snugly on his lap - on him - settled and already feeling spent.

This was so different compared to the last time; if not overwhelming so because of the way you both appeared to be so present. Each movement of your hips, and the way they rolled and grinded and dragged felt too much. So much so that you had become nothing more than a mess of short, quick breathing and blushing, sweaty cheeks. 

Slack-jaw, you were unable to find it in you to return Harry’s kisses, and his joyful, breathy chuckle seemed to lead you to believe he was fine with it. In fact he was happy to keep going as you were. 

Your movements were frantic, and despite the build up, not entirely driven by lust either. Harry continued to encourage you to move as you were; slow, grinding motions on his lap that caused the filthiest of groans and dirtiest of laughs from the two of you. Laughter that was only made stronger as the chair that held you both started to creak too. 

You couldn’t do much about it though other than to breathe into each other’s mouth, and rock your hips together with more fervour each time. 

“Yea’,” he breathed against your lips, left hand at the back of your head holding you to him, while his right rested just above your bum. “‘S better. That’s better.”

It was better. Better than last time. Better than anything before. 

And while it hadn’t been frantic before, it was now as your legs that were hanging down either side of the chair started to tremble and your toes started to dig into the worn carpet beneath them. Hips knocking and your clit dragging heavenly against his public bone, you grasped his name as you buried your face into his neck and dug your nails into his nape.

Harry hissed his approval which fell to a groan as your nails pushed up into his hair and lightly pulled as you sought leverage. There were so many things you were learning this time around and his penchant for liking his hair pulled from time to time, was one of those things. 

“God, ‘m gonna come soon,” he admitted, gruntly as he forced your hips down as he anchored his legs and widened his seating position. “Are you close?”

“Yeah,” you whined. “Yes. Like this-“

And as you pressed your face to his once more, he was everywhere. Soft but hard, loving but commanding. Smelled like clean washing detergent but of country air. Inviting and alluring, allowing you your lingering kisses between grounding breaths that became staccato in unison with the movement of your hips. 

You aren’t ashamed of the whines that escaped your throat as you squeezed down on his cock, praised by indecipherable works that left Harry but were nothing more to you than lips moving against your rough and dry ones. Word that made the burning feeling of your pending orgasm spread through your entire body, warming you and setting you alight.

It was long and deep, with your toes curling into the carpet they were pressed against now. Barely able to catch your breath, sucking in harshly and shaking. 

And when you came to, thoroughly exhausted, you noticed that he was waiting for your say so. That he could let go and enjoy the pleasure brought about by your shared labour. 

“Coming-“ was all the warning that you got and was enough to encourage you to watch him as he came, his face completely void of anything other than pure pleasure. Wrinkles and frowns fade, his mouth falling open with his pink lips glinting prettily under the dim Christmas lights around you.

His forehead gleamed with sweat as he wrapped his arms around you tightly and his hips bucked up one, two and three times for good measure. “Fuck me,” he heaved gruffly.

You were suddenly desperate to feel his lips on yours despite the way you both continued to fight to get your breath back, but settled for resting them against the skin of his cheek, which was hot to the touch. 

When you felt Harry start to go soft, you reluctantly pulled away and let him slip out of you. He wasn’t so keen to let you get too far, holding you just that bit higher than before with his hand cupping gently but firmly at your hip. “Where’d you think you’re going,” he hummed, eyes still closed as he continued to heavily inhale and exhale. 

You softly smiled, taking in his soft face and responded by nuzzling close to him again. 

Nowhere. Somewhere. Anywhere with him.

A place where only the two of you knew, like the back of your hand. The same way you knew each other. Now and possibly forever.

[yessadirichards]

Tony-winning choreographer, actress Ann Reinking dies        NEW YORK

Ann Reinking, the Tony Award-winning choreographer, actress and Bob Fosse collaborator who helped spread a cool, muscular hybrid of jazz and burlesque movement to Broadway and beyond, has died. She was 71.

Reinking died in her sleep Saturday while visiting family in Seattle, said her manager, Lee Gross.

Tributes poured in from the Broadway community, including from Tony Yazbeck, who called her “an absolute inspiration” and Leslie Odom, Jr., who thanked Reinking for being a mentor: “She honored the calling for real. RIP to a legend.” Bernadette Peters took to Twitter to say her heart was broken and Billy Eichner said she was “one of the most mesmerizing people I’ve ever seen on stage. A singular genius. RIP.”

Trained as a ballet dancer, Reinking was known for her bold style of dance epitomized by her work in the revival of the Kander and Ebb musical “Chicago,” complete with net stockings, chair dancing and plenty of pelvic thrusts.

Reinking co-starred as Roxie Hart along with Bebe Neuwirth’s Velma, and created the choreography “in the style of Bob Fosse,” the show’s original director and choreographer who died in 1987. She and Fosse worked together for 15 years and she was also his lover for several of them.

Her work on “Chicago” earned her a 1997 Tony, Drama Desk and Outer Critics Circle awards. Reinking replicated its choreography in productions throughout the world — England, Australia, Austria, Sweden, the Netherlands and elsewhere. She was portrayed by Margaret Qualley in the recent FX series “Fosse/Verdon.”

The musical’s revival was first done in a concert version at City Center’s “Encores” series in 1996 and then moved to Broadway, where in 2011 it became the second longest-running show in Broadway history.

“You know how you hear sometimes a woman goes into labor and 10 minutes later she’s got this beautiful baby? You couldn’t believe that it was materializing in such a beautiful way,” she told The Associated Press in 2011 about the early days of the revival.

In 1998, she co-directed “Fosse,” a salute to the man who had the largest influence, both professionally and personally, on her life. He once called her “one of the finest dancers in the jazz-modern idiom.”

Her movie credits include “Annie” (1982), “Movie, Movie” (1978) and the documentary “Mad Hot Ballroom” (2005), which portrayed Reinking as a ballroom-dance competition judge for New York City kids.

Reinking’s career began in Seattle, where she grew up. In the beginning, she wanted to be a ballet dancer, “like all girls,” she said. As a student, she won a scholarship in San Francisco with the Joffrey Ballet, but at many of the students’ after-hours improvisations, she would just sing and not dance.

Robert Joffrey said that with her outgoing personality and other abilities, she should pursue musical theater. “I waited tables to save up enough money to get here,” she said of New York City, where she arrived with a round-trip ticket back to Seattle and $500. She didn’t need the return trip.

“You wouldn’t get into this if you had a guarantee. People who get into this have a certain sense of the high stakes,” she said. “You need the break and when you get it, you’d better be ready for it.”

Reinking’s break was strung out over several shows. She was in the ensemble for Broadway’s “Coco,” which starred Katharine Hepburn as Coco Chanel, in 1969, and was in the chorus of “Pippin” in 1972, picked by its director and choreographer, Fosse. The ensemble was so small — there were only eight — that the dancers were really seen.

Choreographer Pat Birch was one who noticed, and in 1974 put her in “Over Here,” a World War II musical starring two of the three Andrews Sisters and featuring another unknown, John Travolta.

It led to a starring role in “Goodtime Charley,” a musical about Joan of Arc opposite Joel Grey. The musical was not a success, but it did make theatergoers look at Reinking as a principal performer and not just a member of the chorus.

Her other big break, she said, was in “Dancin’” in 1978, “because I realized you had to be in an original part and that show has to be a hit.” The music-and-dance revue directed and choreographed by Fosse was, running more than three years and earned her a 1978 Tony nomination.

But it was her work on the revival of “Chicago” where Reinking basked in the most attention. The original, a dark indictment of celebrity and hucksterism, opened in the summer of 1975 and ran for about 900 performances. Though not in the opening night cast, Reinking eventually slipped into the role of Roxie Hart, taking over the part from Gwen Verdon, Fosse’s third wife and dancing alter ego. In the 1996 revival, which is still on Broadway, Reinking kept the part of Hart opposite Gray and Neuwirth.

Reinking also gained experience — and stayed in shape — by replacing stars in hit shows: Donna McKechnie in “A Chorus Line”; Gwen Verdon in Fosse’s original “Chicago”; and Debbie Allen in the 1986 revival of “Sweet Charity.”

And she embarked on an eclectic film career — from playing Roy Scheider’s lover in Fosse’s 1979 semi-autobiographical film “All That Jazz,” to the screen version of “Annie” to Blake Edwards’ “Micki and Maude.”

She also created dances for a revival of “Pal Joey” at Chicago’s Goodman Theater and a musical about first lady Eleanor Roosevelt called “Eleanor.” She was on the national tour of “Bye Bye Birdie” opposite Tommy Tune.

After “Eleanor,” offers to choreograph “kept falling in my lap,” Reinking said. She created dances for a pre-Encores “Chicago” in Long Beach, California, with Neuwirth and Juliet Prowse.

In one of the more cringe-worthy moments in her career, Reinking was asked to sing and perform the Oscar nominated song “Against All Odds” by Phil Collins at the 1985 telecast. Reinking lip-synched as she danced a bombastic, cheesy rendition marred by fog.

In recent years, she choreographed “The Look of Love” on Broadway and the Roger Rees-directed off-Broadway “Here Lies Jenny” (2004), starring Neuwirth. In 2011, she helped choreograph “An Evening with Patti LuPone and Mandy Patinkin” on Broadway.

Reinking also produced a documentary called “In My Hands,” about working with children of Marfan’s Syndrome, a rare genetic disorder of the connective tissues that often leaves its victims with limbs that are disproportionately long. She also produced the film “Two Worlds, One Planet,” about “high-functioning” autism.

Reinking’s first three marriages ended in divorce. Since 1994, she had been married to Peter Talbert. She also is survived by a son, Christopher, who has been diagnosed with Marfan syndrome and autism.

“If there is a heaven, I think Bob can look down and be satisfied. He really did have an exponential effect on the next generation of choreographers and dancers,” Reinking once said.

“He demanded the best from you and you wanted to give it. So you got better. All great directors — however, they do it — make you want to be good. I hope I do it. It’s like being a parent, a psychiatrist, a disciplinarian and a friend. You really have to know when to hold them and when to show them.”

[goodnightkisseu]

Time To Heal - Chapter 7

→ pairing: sehun x reader

→ genre: fluff, angst, struggling musician sehun x rich reader

→ word count: 4,054

→ warnings: none

→ summary: you had your life planned out for you ever since you were a little girl. However, when your friend, Baekhyun, takes you with him to his old hangout, you meet someone, someone you were willing to risk your parents’ criticism to be with. His name was Oh Sehun. But, in the end, what you really should have asked yourself, was if Sehun was ready to face your parents…

→ masterlist // exo masterlist // time to heal masterlist

→ [prologue] [ch.1] [ch.2] [ch.3] [ch.4] [ch.5] [ch.6] [ch.7]

→ updates taglist~: @chanyeolol​​​ @meryljill-111192​​​ @sehunscutiepie​​​​ @hi-cupid​​​ @lilian235​​​

note: we are coming up on the end of this series! ;A; honestly I’ve fallen back in love with it as I’ve been editing it for all of you to read ;; I hope that you’ll all enjoy this chapter!

Also, please let me know if you would like to be tagged in this story~

- ash <3

Over the last two years, you had run through hundreds of scenarios in your mind. You theorized about seeing Sehun again, about the things that you would say to each other, but nothing quite amounted to what happened when you actually met. It was definitely awkward, and rightfully so in your eyes. It had been years, and there was no way for either of you to grasp the type of pain the other went through. However, seeing each other again didn't feel nearly as bad as you had expected. You had a nice dinner, and Sehun even went out of his way to apologize for his past behavior. That was never something you had planned to hear.

When you told Baekhyun about your encounter with Sehun, your friend was quick to ask how you felt. He knew it had been trying for you, so, for the meeting to take a completely different turn than you had hypothesized, it was likely a shock. And honestly, you weren't sure if you even knew how you felt. Sehun was someone that had broken your heart, and never did you think he'd feel remorse for it. But you could tell that he was aware of his actions, and that felt more in line with the Sehun that you knew. Your feelings towards him at the moment were... complicated.

Yet, as complicated as they were, you weren't going to let them stand in the way of his apparent efforts to make amends. Additionally, you felt like accepting his apology might have been the step that you needed to move on with your life, to keep him from running through your mind. So, after receiving his new number from Baekhyun, you sent a simple message. It read, "Let's put the past behind us and move forward. Good luck with your new single, and I can't wait to hear it!"

In the days that followed, you felt a sense of relief, weight lifted off of your shoulders. It felt like making amends after all of this time was the right move. It felt right to move forward, and that was what you did. Slowly, you found yourself emerging from this space that had only been occupied by you and Baekhyun. You started to go out again, whether you were invited by Baekhyun or your coworkers. You started living that life that you had unknowingly put on hold. The more time you spent with others, the more you felt like a whole person, your own person again. You were able to have fun, to chat with them, to really experience life in the way you wanted to.

And in due time, you even started dating again.  

Nothing was ever quite permanent. It had been a long time. You had to rediscover and realize what you were actually looking for in a significant other. Guys came and went, but you never quite clicked with any of them... until Changmin. He was your longest relationship after Sehun, though it only lasted for a little over half a year. The two of you had met during fashion week. Your parents sent you to oversee their part of the show, as they had some other business out of the country. You had met backstage while you were directing some of your models, and he taking pictures of the different lines from each company. Something at that moment just clicked for the both of you.

Coincidentally, Changmin was someone that your parents had been trying to set you up with for years. He ran an editorial company that was well respected across the industry. To your parents, it was a match made in heaven for you and your business. He was a nice man, and his reputation had the possibility of boosting up your family's brand. The potential for both companies to grow together was exponential. Your parents were thrilled.

Unfortunately, it didn't work out. You weren't sure exactly what drove you apart. Everything had been going so well for the two of you... until it wasn't. It could have been the extra hours that you had to put in to get the new line ready for the coming season. It could have been the fact that Changmin was overseas for most of the year, the two of you only meeting up when he was in town. Honestly, you spent so much time apart you wouldn't have been surprised if maybe you fell out of it because he already had someone else. At the end of the day, the relationship came to an end, much to your parents' disappointment.

Admittedly, it was painful losing Changmin. During those periods where the two of you had been inseparable when your relationship was in a good state, you had started to depend on him. With things in Baekhyun's life picking up, Changmin had become your source of comfort in your best friend's absence. Now that he was gone, you felt that emptiness again. It was that same type of void you felt when Sehun exited your life, and like a creature of habit, you threw yourself back into your work. The only difference was that you didn't close yourself off this time. You still went out, had a good time with the people closest to you, but with your career picking up, you decided that there wasn't time for another serious relationship.

Instead, you had to focus on your true passion, your job. And in seemingly no time at all, three years passed.

You had been working hard to learn the ins and outs of the industry, immersing yourself in everything it had to offer. You went to every show, board meeting, and kept your focus on learning how the business was run.  With retirement around the corner, your parents very naturally started to give you more control of the company. They were transitioning you into the full-time over and representative in their absence. And though it had been stressful at first, time and patience made it all a bit easier. Everyone that worked at the fashion house gave you time, and for that, you were grateful. You still had a lot to learn, but with your parents' excitement with their newest line, you knew that you had no choice but to make sure that it did well.

Today was filled to the brim with work, much like your schedule had been for the last few months. You were to oversee the photoshoot for the new line, so that morning, bright and early, you drove out to the studio, meeting the rest of your staff in the large open building. You worked with the stylists to organize the clothes in an easy to access manner. You talked with the makeup artists about which looks would suit the different moods and styles of the wardrobe pieces. You coordinated with Jinhee, the lead for this line, making sure that you had each checked off everything on your list. She was in high spirits today, and you couldn't help but chuckle at her eagerness.

The entire time that Jinhee had been working on this line, she had a model in mind that she wanted to represent it. She was never forthcoming with his name, but this was something that you had all grown accustomed to. She didn't want to ruin the surprise for anyone because, to her, the model was such a big part of making the line come together, and she wanted everyone to properly experience that. What she had said about him was that he wasn't a model by trade. He was someone that worked in the entertainment industry and had a knack for photographing well. Many magazines had asked him to be a part of their issue, and each photoshoot turned out better than the last. So, when the model walked arrived, you weren't sure exactly what to expect.

Well, you knew one thing you weren't anticipating. You hadn't suspected that it would be Sehun.

As one of your interns gave him a tour of the set, blushing like mad whenever he would throw her a smile, you couldn't help but realize how strangely life worked. It almost felt like a twisted form of fate to bring the two of you together like this. Even though it was for a work function, it still felt very surreal. You hadn't seen Sehun in years. Life had picked up so quickly that the last time the two of you met up was about a month after you reunited at his concert. But it wasn't just you that got busy. It was also Sehun.

From what the news and Baekhyun told you, the single that Sehun had mentioned was in the works when the two of you last met was the one that shot them to stardom. It didn't make waves on its initial release, but the more that people heard it, the more interest the band garnered. Within a month, the song topped the charts for multiple weeks on end, a feat that had been difficult for many artists in recent years. Sehun and the band started to get more recognition. They ended up doing lots of interviews and television appearances. Their schedule got so packed that even Baekhyun had a hard time meeting up with them. The two of you lamented about how the job of a celebrity must have been hard. Still, you knew that, no matter what, Sehun would always keep in contact with Baekhyun, even if it was just a simple text.

You would also send Sehun a message from time to time, though you rarely expected an answer, unlike your friend. Granted, your words were usually congratulatory, messages of excitement when a new album or tour was announced. Sehun's answers in reply were always rather simple, typically a 'thank you' or something along those lines. He would do the same for you, mostly if he saw good things about your company in the headlines, about how innovative it was or how well it was doing. The two of you would sometimes chat after that, filling the void, but it never got personal. It was strange to think that, at one point, you were in love.

But now, you were just acquaintances. Ones that would check in on each other from time to time. It definitely made Baekhyun's life easier, not having to dance around when he talked about the two of you. Still, there was something rather... bittersweet about it.

You had been so busy running around, making sure that everything was in place, that you didn't get a chance to properly greet Sehun at first. It wasn't until your intern brought him over to meet the team that the two of you finally met. Everyone happily greeted him, lamenting on his handsome features. You knew that he couldn't show it, but the way that his eyes locked on your own, you knew that he was surprised to see you. Still, he politely greeted everyone, and you did the same, inviting him to sit and relax for a bit while you worked with the team on the finishing touches.

Overall, the photoshoot went rather well. It was outfit after outfit, lighting change after lighting change, and makeup touchups, but every time you studied the monitor or watched the live shoot in front of you, you had to admit that Jinhee was right. Sehun really did fit this type of styling. Granted, you were sure that Sehun could pull off anything, as he was the type that always made what he wore seem comfortable and fitting to him, this particular set of colors, combined with this strong features, completed the look. He really suited the vibe that the higherups were looking for from this line, and you were relieved. The slight awkwardness for you was well worth the results, in your opinion.

As everyone prepared for the next set of outfits, your eyes wandered around, making sure that everything was proceeding as expected. Your eyes eventually landed on one of your stylists as she helped Sehun into his next outfit. Yet, something about it felt... off. Slowly, you left your spot behind the monitors and approached them, the issue catching your eye immediately.

"Hyerin, this type of shirt doesn't lie quite like that," you told her, the young woman jumping slightly when she heard your voice. You apologized for scaring her before you proceeded to direct her on how to adjust the fabric. However, instead of doing what you suggested, she moved out of the way instead, leaving you to pick up the material and fix it yourself. Though, as you worked, you never focused on the person in front of you, only on the clothes.

"It's more like this," you told her, demonstrating how the cloth should lie. "The style is more open, so you want to make sure that it sits comfortably on the model's shoulders," you instructed. You saw Hyerin nod, thanking you before she excused herself to get the next outfit ready. You continued to fiddle with the fabric for a bit longer, making sure that it suited the style you were looking for. Once you finished, you turned to head back to the monitors, when the male in front of you finally spoke.

"I didn't expect to see you today. I had no idea that you were directing photoshoots now," Sehun stated. His words managed to stop you from walking away, and inwardly he was glad. This was the first time in years that you were in front of him again, and everything in his being told him to keep you there, to keep you talking.

"Well, I've been promoted a couple of times since we last met up. The upside is that I have more say in everything now. The obvious downside is the responsibilities and the lack of sleep," you joked, wanting to keep it light between the two of you. Yet, you also knew that you needed to address the obvious elephant in the room, as well. "By the way, I'm sorry if this is a bit uncomfortable for you. Jinhee never disclosed the name of the model she wanted for this photoshoot. I never would have known that you would be the one to show up, or else I would have asked for someone else to direct..."

Gently, Sehun shook his head. "Don't worry about it. I'm actually not uncomfortable at all. We did decide to put all of that behind us, didn't we?" he inquired, seeing that small smile cross your features as you gave him a nod. "Actually, if I'm, to be honest, I'm glad you're here. It's good to see you, and your presence has helped to ease my nerves..."

At that moment, you dared to look up at him, your eyes looking into his, getting lost in those gentle dark orbs you used to love so much. As much as you were a source of calm for Sehun, he had been the same for you. Honestly, no photoshoot you had ever directed had gone as smoothly as today's had, and though you didn't want to admit it at first, Sehun definitely was a factor in it.

"It's nice to see you as well," you told him earnestly. There was more that you wanted to say, but when the photographer announcing that he was ready for the next set of shots, it cut you off before you could. "Keep up the good work, okay?" you told him, before running back to your previous position, picking up your things and getting right back to work.

"I... I missed you..." Sehun murmured to himself, the words that he wanted to speak to you directly, but wasn't able to. It annoyed him that he didn't just say them, but he knew that there were other things to focus on at the moment, and that was not one fo them. Instead, he moved back under the bright lights, going straight to work, in front of the cameras that he had grown accustomed to.

After the two of you met up again, having made amends for the past, it became painfully apparent to Sehun that he missed having you in his life. At first, he had thought it was just a fleeting feeling, a strong sense of nostalgia at your presence, but as the weeks and then months passed, he knew it was more than that. There were days, after long hours of practice that he longed for your comforting and supportive aura, that presence that used to calm him when things were difficult. He missed that beautiful smile you would give him and the way it would light up the room around you. He missed your encouraging words, the ones that would lift his spirits and make the days more comfortable. Sehun knew that all of these small things, these things that he used to love about you, were things that he wanted in his life again.

For a long time, he told himself that they were things that he could no longer have. He convinced himself that he had broken the relationship beyond repair. Instead, he found solace in your little congratulatory messages and the light conversation that would follow. Yet, he wanted more. He craved for more conversation, for more interactions, and eventually, he threw his pride aside and asked Baekhyun about how you were doing. What he hadn't expected his friend to tell him was that you moved on, that you had started to date again.

It wasn't something that surprised Sehun, and he knew that it was bound to happen. He wanted you to be happy to find someone that made you happy. It just pained him that he might not be able to be that person for you anymore. He found himself interacting with you less, trying to still the pain of his own heart. Work became his best distraction, and he stopped hoping that anything would change between the two of you.

Seeing you today, though it was a surprise, also brought some of those feelings to the surface again. Sehun knew where he was, and that, as professionals, you both had a job to do. But still... he wondered... if maybe...

The remainder of the shoot went smoothly. There weren't too many lighting changes or even makeup changes for the rest of the day. A majority of it was just getting Sehun in and out of the remaining outfits, something that the stylists could handle on their own. You continued to monitor from a distance, only piping up if something felt off. In the early evening was when the photoshoot finally came to an end. You thanked everyone for all of their hard work in making this line look and feel as amazing as it did before you all started to pack up for the day. You helped sort through the clothes, making sure that they were put in the correct boxes while your photographer and his team packed away all of their lights.

As people shuffled around the noise level at its highest for the day, you almost didn't notice the older man approaching you. It was Sehun's manager, and the moment that he got your attention, he asked if you would have a minute to speak with Sehun later. It seemed like your old acquaintance wanted to see you. In turn, you asked if it would be possible to meet with Sehun after your staff had left, and the man agreed, going to relay the information to his charge.

Once everything was accounted for and neatly stowed away, you helped your team move everything out to the vans that were parked outside. They informed you that they would be able to get everything back to the studio on their own, and you thanked them. When all of the cars were gone, you made your way back into the building, the space larger now that it was emptied out. You heard the sound of footsteps approaching the room as a familiar and tall figure entered, giving you a small wave. Sehun arrived without his manager in tow, and you could only imagine that he was downstairs, waiting for the artist.

"So, why did you want to talk to me in private?" you asked softly.

"I figured that you wouldn't want the people you worked with to gossip, so I thought this would be better. It is a private matter at all, between us," he replied, seeing you gently nod. Both of you were aware of the damage that could be done if rumors started flying. You may have been in a relationship before, but it wasn't well-known by anyone. Something like that coming out could be detrimental to both him and you... mainly if people went digging for information.  

Still, now that he was given this time alone with you, he wasn't too sure how to proceed. What were the proper words to use in this situation? Maybe, he just needed to say it. "Earlier... I wanted to say that I missed you."

Everything that Sehun had to say lately felt like it surprised you, though you tried not to let it read on your features. There was a time when you had also missed his presence. Over the years, you decided not to depend on that old feeling too much. You had tried to move on, but you couldn't deny that he had been a big part of your life, and that, sometimes, you would miss him too. You just never thought that he'd admit that, given how things had gone before.

"I... I feel the same sometimes," you confessed, seeing that bit of surprise flicker across his features.

"I guess... I guess that's a natural feeling for both of us. That sometimes, it could be weird not having the other around," he explained, watching you nod. "It feels like something is... missing, right?"

You nodded. Sehun was hitting the nail right on the head, but you weren't entirely sure where he was going with this, and you wanted to know. You wanted him to make a move.

"I know that we can't be who we were before, but I miss your companionship. We said we would make amends, and we've started to, but I would like to try harder. I would like for us to be able to confide in each other again. I know that pain doesn't expire, and I'm not saying that we just throw all of that out the window, but I... I miss having you around as a friend. The guys are great, but they don't understand me like you do..."

It was apparent from his words that Sehun shared your sentiments. You, too, had missed the comfort and safety that he used to provide for you. Before, it wasn't just Baekhyun that you could run to, but Sehun too. Often, you would even feel more comfortable speaking to Sehun about things than Baekhyun. Maybe having that back... it would be nice. It was better than hiding those troubles away from the world.

"It's going to be strange and awkward, you know. Going back to being friends... there's obvious damage that's been done," you pointed out.

"I'm well aware. But I think, because we're aware of it, we won't try to push it if it doesn't feel right," Sehun added. "Plus, don't you think it would make Baek happy? You know, getting to spend time with the both of us, and not having to have split custody?"

You scoffed. "You know how I feel about Baek, Sehun. I have a soft spot for him. You can't go using him against me..."

"Unfortunately, Baek is the only card I have to play. After all, you're his ride or die," he teased, a gentle smile lining his features.

The silence grew between the two of you, and you were the first to speak up after giving it some thought. "Then let's give it a try. For old time's sake."

With that confirmation, Sehun gave you a small nod and a smile. As he saw you off that night, Sehun felt the void in his heart filled. Though he didn't know how to express it, having you back in his life, even as a friend, made him whole again...

[mirkwoodshewolf]

Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise; Freddie Mercury x black!child reader

Now I was skeptical at first to post this fic for the LONGEST time but after last night and Rami Malek winning his 1st Oscar, I feel like this story needs to be shared with my tumblr people. Now this is my first ever specific racial reader insert (I’m always fair when it comes to my reader inserts by also putting the abbreviations for skin color just to make it more fair for my readers) from the requester that I had this from on Wattpad who either so I want a GOOD WARNING HERE. THERE ARE RACIAL SLURS HERE BIG ONES. Only spoken TWICE but the N word is said, so if this OFFENDS YOU, you don’t have to read this. I beg of you because I don’t want to insult anyone. I AM NOT A RACIST person and anyone who is is scum of the scum.

Plus as this is my first solo Freddie Mercury oneshot, please go easy on me. People on wattpad told me I nailed his character but I hope I do the same for all of you. 

Warnings: RACISM *WHICH I DO NOT PROMOTE NEVER BE A RACIST it’s  TOTAL dick move in the words of the famous Deadpool*, violence, beatings, the use of the N word *AGAIN ONLY TWICE BUT FAIR WARNING!!* 

Taglist Queen *open*:

@alexfayer

___________________________________________________

It has always been my dream to go to a Queen concert. Ever since I first heard their record at a friend's house, I felt this instant connection to their music that no other musician that I've listened to before. The way they create new sounds and cross genres with each other, its unlike anything I've ever heard.

I've begged and begged my parents to one day go see them in concert one day but when you're in my family and you live in the south of New Orleans, Louisiana money is hard to come by. My daddy always says he can only afford working double sometimes triple shifts to last us enough rent for a couple months and groceries, but concert tickets are as expensive as they can get.

But then one day on my 11th birthday while my mama was working with one of her best costumers for her seamstress job, he had gotten wind that it was my birthday so he gifted me with a special surprise present. When I opened up the box to reveal an envelope, I opened it up and I was shocked to see that inside it were concert tickets to Queen coming to New Orleans tonight.

I screamed and jumped up and down with my best friend Laura who was also a Queen fan, in fact she's the friend who got me into them. At first my mama couldn't accept such a generous gift but Laura's dad wouldn't take no for an answer. In fact he told my mama that it was payback for all the house calls of seaming up dresses for Laura or doing adjustments for his suits.

So after she was done with Mr. Burn's suits, she took me home and got me dressed in my finest clothes and we waited for Mr. Burn's and Laura to come by in their new Cadillac so that we could head to the concert. I heard the horn honking and Laura crying out my name. I could barely contain my excitement when my mama said.

"Hold on (y/n) honey, now remember stay with Mr. Burns at all times, don't leave his side and do everything he tells you alright?"

"I will mama, I promise." She smiled and gave me a kiss and told me to have a good time. I could barely hear her because at that point I was in the car with Laura and the two of us were talking in high pitched tones of how excited we were to see Queen.

We arrived at the stadium and Mr. Burns gave the man our tickets and we were lead to our seats.

"Ohh I'm so excited I could just leap like a frog in the bayou! Gahh I can't believe they've finally come to New Orleans. Oh aren't they the bees knees?" Laura fangirled out.

"They are, hey Laura if you had to pick your favorite, which one would it be?" I asked her.

"Oh Roger Taylor hands down, he's the best drummer of any band. Plus he's as handsome as an angel from the Lord, how about you?"

"I would have to say.....Freddie Mercury, his voice is so.....so....raw yet tamed. Like it's almost supernatural and yet, belongs in our world." I've always admired Freddie's singing because of the way he's able to control his voice. I've heard tale that he can go 4 octaves higher than any male singer that ever did live on this Earth.

Soon the lights in the stadium dimmed until it became pitch black and the audience roared with applause like we were about to watch a football game. The stage lights flashed on and soon the first song of "We will Rock you" came on. Laura and I stomped our feet and clapped along and we sang along to the chorus and once the final part of the song came on, there standing on stage as the lights on stage shined upon them, stood the four members of Queen themselves, right before my very eyes.

The entire concert was filled with cheers, singing along to all of mine and Laura's favorite songs, and even hearing new songs that have yet to get a record release but Queen graced New Orleans with those songs. During one of their pieces, Freddie raised his mic up towards John Deacon and he cried out.

"We love you New Orleans!" At that declaration, everyone was going nuts.

By the end of the night, they gave one final bow and the concert was over. Laura and I were walking out fangirling hysterically at what we had just seen.

"Alright I'm gonna get Carl back over here so you girls just stay here alright?" Laura's dad said to us.

"Okay daddy." Said Laura. Once he left us alone Laura and I continued our fangirling out. "Oh my god do you remember when Freddie actually came onto the stage to crowd surf?"

"Oh Lord have mercy on my soul that was the best part! He always makes people even in the back row feel like they're important to the show."

"I really loved Roger's drum solo that he did."

"Oh yeah that was awesome!" We kept gushing out to each other when we heard a voice say.

"Why did you bring that here?" we turned around to see a couple of teenage boys maybe around 15-16years old, all three of them white.

"Excuse me?" asked Laura.

"You heard, in fact why are you associating with people like them?" A brown haired boy stated as he pointed to me.

"They shouldn't even be allowed to even watch concerts in our sections, why didn't she go to the top rows with all the rest of them negros?" Now that was a comment that I have heard for most of my life. Anytime when I would go out shopping with my mama, there's always either a white man or woman who says that word to both my mama and me and it always breaks my heart to be called that.

I'm smart enough to know what that means, I maybe black but I'm not stupid.

"Why shouldn't she? She's my friend and she can come to a Queen concert with me no matter who says." Laura said sticking up for me as she stood in front of me to protect me.

"Aww you hearing this fellas? Looks like we got ourselves a negro loving traitor." Said the same brunette boy. Soon he and his friends circled around us and then one of them grabbed Laura and pulled her away from me. We both screamed for each other but I was shoved harshly to the ground.

Before I could even stand up, I felt a hard kick to my stomach and soon it began. What my older brother DJ went through about a month ago when he got jumped heading home from work. I could hear Laura screaming at them to stop and from what I could see, she tried to fight back but the blonde boy holding her was too strong.

I was almost about to black out when I heard a voice say.

"What on earth is going on here!?" I managed to slowly lift my head up and I thought I was dreaming because I swear to the Lord above that I was seeing Freddie Mercury along with the rest of the band members of Queen standing just a few feet away from us.

"Nothing." One of the boys that was standing over me tried to cover up what was really happening.

"Really, cause from where we're standing it looks like you cowardly dicks are picking a fight with two young girls." Roger's voice spoke up.

"Well we uhh....."

"You little boys think you can dictate on who comes to see us? Did we ask you to beat up a poor, innocent child for our sake?" Freddie's voice spoke up in a stern, harsh tone as he walked right up toward us. "Now unless you lads want to get into even more trouble, I suggest you clear on out of here." Soon the three boys took off.

I looked up to see Freddie Mercury standing over me. He knelt down in front of me and held out his hand and he asked me.

"Can you stand dear?" I shakily reached out for his hand and I managed to grab it. Slow and steady he tried to help me up but suddenly my world went black and I found myself falling forward.

*3rd Person POV*

Quickly reacting, Freddie managed to catch (y/n) in his arms.

"Is she gonna be okay? Please she's my best friend in the whole wide world I can't bear to lose her. She's not gonna die is she?" Laura began to sob out hysterically when Freddie spoke up.

"Calm down darling, I promise we'll try to help your friend out as best we can. What's your name love?"

"Laura. Laura Burns, and my friend's name is (y/n) (l/n)."

"Okay Laura did you come here with anyone?"

"Yeah my daddy, he went to go find our driver to take us home."

"Alright, Roger why don't you and Brian help Laura find her father, Deacy you come with me and help me find a medic for (y/n)." Roger and Brian both guided Laura to find her father while Freddie took (y/n) back inside the stadium to their dressing room.

While Freddie placed (y/n) down on the couch trying to make sure her head was fully supported. He had asked John to find a medic as fast as he could and while he waited, he looked back down at (y/n) and couldn't help but feel this rage building up inside.

Now he and the band were aware of the brutal racism that goes on in America, especially down in the southern states where black people can freely be assaulted by white people and not be given the justice they deserve just because of their skin color. But it sickened him to know that in this case it was a child involved in a brutal beatdown that should never have happened, and near a Queen concert of all places.

He soon heard light moaning and when he came back to his senses, Freddie saw that (y/n) was beginning to gain consciousness.

*My POV*

I woke up to feel my head resting on a bunch of pillows and a bright light shining down from above. At first I thought I was in heaven because my mama always told me Heaven was a bright light, but I was still feeling this roaring pain in my head and pulsing feeling along my ribs, I thought heaven meant no more pain?

"Take it easy darling, you had quite a rumble outside with some heartless dicks." I looked to my right to see that sitting right before me was Freddie Mercury himself. I almost was about to pass out again but he said to me again, "Careful darling, can't risk you passing out again with the condition you're in. You might have a concussion." I looked around trying to find Laura and fearing that those boys might've taken her away I finally spoke up.

"Laura....my friend Laura is....is she—"

"She's fine darling, a little shook up but Roger and Brian are taking care of her right now, they're trying to find her father and they'll be here soon to come find you. For now I need you to do something for me, do you think you can do that?" Normally you wouldn't trust a stranger with anything but for some reason I felt like I could trust Freddie so I found myself nodding softly.

He smiled softly before reaching into a drawer and taking out a small flashlight and he explained.

"Now I'm no doctor and I have no idea what the hell is taking Deacy so long to find one, but all I'm gonna do is just shine this in your eyes, and I want you to follow my finger okay (y/n)?" I was surprised to hear Freddie Mercury say my name when I hadn't told him yet. So I nodded again and he said, "good, okay now eyes forward, straight at me." The flashlight came on and I squinted a bit and then he said, "okay now just follow my finger just with your eyes." He then slowly moved his index finger to the right and I followed it.

He moved it to the left and I followed it. Wherever his finger went my eyes followed it, then he did a crazy flick with them that was too fast for my eyes to follow. At that point he chuckled softly and said.

"I'm only messing with you darling."

"Uhh Mr. Mercury..."

"Oh darling please that makes me sound old, call me Freddie." He interrupted me.

"Sorry. Freddie, how did you know my name?"

"Your friend Laura told us before I brought you in here."

"How do you know to do the 'follow the finger movement?' if you say you're not a doctor?"

"I used to be a boxer when I was a lad. Even though I was top fighter I first started out getting a few blows to the head. Guess that medical procedure of figuring out whether one had a concussion still stuck with me even now. And lucky for you you're gonna be fine. Just a little bump on the head, but we'll have the doctor take a look at the rest of you." He explained as he turned the flashlight off and set it back inside the dresser. As I adjusted myself on the couch trying to sit up, I felt the pain intense around my ribs again and I said to myself.

"Maybe I shouldn't have come here."

"What do you mean by that love?" I looked up at him before shamefully looking down and I said.

"Maybe they were right. I shouldn't have come here, never should have even gotten an interest in music that didn't belong to my kind. Then maybe none of this would've happened. I've caused nothing but trouble tonight, now Laura will never want to be my friend again."

"You don't know that." He said. I felt the couch dip beside me and an arm wrap around my shoulder and he said to me, "Now you listen to me (y/n), okay? Queen does not belong to one particular race. We do not play for just the whites, look at me do I look like a white man to you?" I looked at him and noticed that his skin wasn't white at all but tanned. Almost as if he had been kissed by the sun.

"No." I answered softly.

"Damn right I'm not, hell I'm handsomer than any white man out there." That statement made a soft laugh pass through my lips which in turn made Freddie smile. "Don't let anyone tell you what you can or cannot listen to. If you want to listen to Queen, then fuck it all you raise up volume on your stereo till your house shakes and listen to our music. Because behind all the fame and fortune, we're just four misfits who don't belong together playing for other misfits. The outcasts right in the back of the room who feel like they don't belong. For we belong to them. To you. And no one can tell us otherwise."

"You really stand for that?" I asked him.

"Of course, this world's always wanting to stay by standards and rules. And rules are meant to be broken, right?" I smiled and nodded at him. "So you keep being a fan of Queen darling, and never let anyone tell you to stop. You promise?"

"I promise." He held out his hand and I immediately took it and we shook on it to seal the deal permanently.

It was then at that moment Laura and her father came in with the rest of the band members of Queen plus a medic.

"Oh (y/n)! When Laura told me about what happened I raced over here as fast as I could. You tell me what those boys looked like and I promise to make sure the police show no mercy on them."

"It's all taken care of Mr. Burns, in fact as an apology for such a traumatic experience that should never happen at a Queen concert, I've decided to fly both of your families to our next concert in Los Angeles plus be given backstage passes to talk about the concert afterwards." Freddie proclaimed.

"Ohh no we cannot accept that....." Mr. Burns started up but Freddie interrupted him and said.

"I won't take no for an answer darling. I want these girls to get the proper Queen experience both before and after the show."

"You might as well take it Mr. Burns, once he sets his mind to something he never lets it go." Said Brian. Laura pulled on her dad's arm begging him to agree to it. After her begging and pleading, Mr. Burns agreed to the tickets and boy did Laura act as happy as a jack rabbit in May. We were then given the tickets and Laura came over to me hugging me tightly which made me wince cause even now with bandages wrapped around my bruised ribs, I was still in pain.

Laura then began to rant on about how excited she was and just as boys of Queen left to continue on the road, I looked up to see Freddie turn back toward me and send me a wink before following behind the rest of the band. While I tuned out Laura's excitement, Freddie's words continued to ring in my head and I knew from then on I wasn't going to allow anyone to tell me what I can and can't do.

If I wanted to be a Queen fan, well like Freddie said, then I be a Queen fan, and no one can tell me otherwise.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #233

lalala song lyrics i’m about to go home so copy/pasting time.

What subject do you seem to struggle with the most? Various forms of mathematics. Have you ever solved a Rubik’s Cube? Noooo. I don't have that dedication. What’s the worst feeling in the world? Specifically? Giving someone everything you have physically and emotionally with full force and finding out you weren't enough. Who do you think is the easiest to talk to? Sara, probably. What is your favorite genre of movie? Horror, probably. What’s the best thing that happened to you today? Being told I don't have strep throat. Do you have a favorite metal band or do you not like metal? Metal is my favorite genre. I claim a lot as "favorites," but the reigning king will always be Ozzy Osbourne. What’s your favorite kind of science? Genetics. What’s your homeroom? We don't have those in college. If you had to move, where would you move to? Well, my only choice would be to move in with my dad, his wife, and her son. I'm not financially independent. Who did you last go to the movies with? Dad. I think. Have you ever read anything written by Shakespeare? I'm not going to include things assigned in schools because everyone had to read like, Beowulf or something similar at some point. I once started to read the full Macbeth (we read a condensed version in school) during a hospital stay, but I didn't finish it. Who’s the cutest person you know? Have you fuckin SEEN Sara when she's excited because- How about the funniest? Girt's funny as fuck. What is your current desktop picture? An adorable meerkat pup looking at the camera al;sdjfal;kjwerads If you could be reincarnated into anything you wanted, what would it be? I don't know if I'd even want that, but let's just say I was. Maybe... I was gonna say a lioness, because they're high on the food chain, beautiful, and social animals, but yeah I'd prefer to not be poached. Perhaps a house cat. What talent would you like to have? I wish I could draw hyperrealistically. What New Year’s resolutions did you make? I don't make those. What are three songs that mean the most to you? "Pretty Woman" by Van Halen, "The Only Exception" by Paramore, and probably "It's Alright" by Mother Mother. What do you think of your parents? I love them. What is one thing you would do to make the world better? I wish with a snap of my fingers I could just make all litter disappear or something like that. If you could be invisible for a day, what would you do? ... Wow. I actually thought about it, and the first thing my mind drifted to was "go to Jason's just to see he's okay," and I don't like that. We pass his house every day to go to school and come back, and I think it's only natural that I get curious, particularly when his car is there, but I don't want to care. How much cash do you have on you right now? Just a few dollars from Mom to get something from the snack or drink machine from school if I need to. What’s the hardest thing you’ve ever had to do in your life? Move on. Let go of people. Forgive. How do you measure intelligence? I dunno, how do you? Define the *type* of intelligence. What cartoons do you watch? None actively. Have you ever used drugs? Not illicit ones. Are you into tattoos? *blinks* Do you like photography? I fucking read this as "pornography" first aslkjweoaider. But yeah, I love love love photography. What’s the biggest celebrity you’ve ever seen in real life? The only celebrity I think I've ever seen is Alice Cooper, and it was at a concert. What person in history do you admire most? I don't know enough about any historical figure to really answer this with passion. What is the most daring thing that you have done in public? I don't know considering I'm not that daring. Probably a kiss momentarily going too far or something. Are you afraid of anything that most people are not afraid of? Whale sharks lmao. But pregnancy is the biggie. Well, maybe most are to a mild degree at least, idk. Have you ever watched someone struggle with addiction? Yeah. Who do you look up to for your style? I don't look up to a certain person. If you were to invent something, what would it be? I don't know off the top of my head and I don't feel like sitting here- OH NO WAIT! Remember that one year deviantART's April Fools prank was that it produced some sort of technology where you could visualize a drawing, and by scanning your finger or some weird shit while you envisioned it, it could produce it on the screen? Yeah, something like that. I'd pay big bucks for something that could put my ideas on paper. Who would you like to get to know better? One of my RP partners that I've known since childhood. She's just extremely private online. What’s your favorite thing to order at a Chinese food restaurant? Pork fried rice is my jam. In your opinion, what is the greatest challenge the world faces today? Greed, probably. What have you achieved that you once thought was impossible? Getting over Jason. What have you tried to quit, but weren’t able to? Meat. Not for lack of motivation, but health needs. What was the last rumor that you heard? I don't know. What country star would you most like to meet and why? I'm not interested in meeting any. Have you ever been in a car accident? Yeah. What is the most dangerous thing you have ever done? Overdose. What is the meaning of life? I don't pretend to know anymore. I think everyone gives their life its own meaning based on values, goals, beliefs, etc. Do you prefer cupcakes or muffins? That's hard, man. Depends on the kind, I guess. What is the funniest movie you’ve seen in your whole entire lifetime? White Chicks never fails to get me. What’s the worst nightmare you’ve ever had? My dad about to molest me. What’s your favorite amusement park ride? Merry-go-rounds lmao. Who are your musical influences? This seems like a question for an aspiring musician, which I'm not. What’s the best pick-up line that’s ever been tried on you? I don't know if anyone's ever tried one on me. How many drinks can you handle? I wouldn't really know as I've never reached the point of being drunk, but seemingly quite a few. Weak ones, anyway. If it has a high alcohol concentration, I'm not drinking that shit. What was the longest phone conversation you’ve ever had? Idk, most of the afternoon or evening. I think one occasion with an old best friend went past five hours. Do you know where you want to go to college? I'm happy at my current college. They care a lot about their students. Are you satisfied with the picture on your ID card? Permit, fuck no. School ID, it's alright. What fruit did you last eat? An apple. Aside from yourself, who was the last person to see you naked? My mom. How many classes are you taking? Four, currently. Jumping up to six next semester... though not really by choice. My adviser wants me to have like a safety net by having two classes I CAN drop if I need to, but she's realistic in pointing out that the school path I visualize doable for me will be a VERY slow one and ultimately cost so, so much more money, so she wants to nudge me along as best she can while keeping my limitations in mind. I'm definitely going to try the best I can to do this in four years, but yeah... unlikely. But that's okay to me, so long I get there in not TOO long of a time. Have you ever lost anything down a toilet? I don't think so... but I do recall when my older sister was tiny she flushed a little toy truck down the toilet. We had to get a plumber to save it lmao. I think my mom has kept the truck. Are you someone’s best friend? One of hers. Do you have any goldfishes? No. Have you ever had a pet that you disliked? I absolutely hate my sister's dog that for whatever fucking reason lives with Mom and me. Why we keep a dog that does nothing but annoy us and piss us off is a subject of more than frequent arguing. When was the last time you saw hail? I don't know, a long time ago. What color eyes do you prefer: Green or Brown? Green. Have you ever given a nickname to your pet(s)? Oh yeah. Of my living ones, I call Venus "Miss Venus" and "pretty girl" a whole lot, while Teddy has a whole lot, but mostly "booga," "bub(by)," "boogie," and "Teddy-boo." I just call Roman "butt" a lot, lmao. I don't really have a common one for Mitsu, but I sometimes use "baby girl," I think. Ever been on a boat before? Like, fishing boats. Which is better: Skiing or Snowboarding? I wouldn't know, never tried either. Can you change the oil on a car? I have no clue how. Ever ran out of gas? Not while I myself was driving. I don't even know if I've ever been in the car while that's happened. Favorite kind of sandwich? Most of the time just an 'ole pb&j. Best thing to eat for breakfast? mmmmmmm cinnamon rolls are the GOOD SHIT. Are you horny? Nah. Do you have any magazine subscriptions? Nope. Which are better legos or lincoln logs? Lincoln logs or GET OUT. Are you stubborn? Yeah, most of the time. Are you afraid of heights? YEAH. Ever used a gun? Nooooo and I don't want to. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer? Idk if the guy who did my school ID card was an actual photographer? I dunno? Ever eat a pierogi? I hate those goddamn pockets of disgust. Favorite type of fruit pie? I dun like pie. I used to be okay with apple, though. Do you believe in ghosts? 110%. Ever have a deja-vu feeling? Yes because our world is just a simulation and it's a glitch- (I'm only semi-kidding btw idk I kinda believe it) Why do you think others get deja-vu? Because our world is just a simulation and it's a glitch- Take a vitamin daily? No. I need to, though. Wear a bath robe? No, I get dressed right after the shower. What do you wear to bed? Pajama pants and a tank top. First concert? Alice Cooper. Outside. During a thunderstorm. Shit was badass. Peanuts or sunflower seeds? Both are ew. I can handle a little bit of peanut better, though. Ever take dance lessons? I grew up taking a lot through middle school and some of high school. I tooook... clogging (I was embarrassingly good at that omg), jazz, modern (my fave), lyrical very briefly 'cuz I am NOT graceful, and hip hop. I always hated the music, but the dancing itself is fun. Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing? No. They can do whatever they aspire to. Have you ever cried because you were so happy? Yeah. Own any record albums? Not anymore, Mom sold them. I wish I had them now, ahhhh. I love 'em. Own a record player? No. Who would you like to see in concert? I am seeing Ozzy next year or I will fucking riot, Metallica, and Rammstein. Many others would be cool, but those are the biggies. I'd love to see Manson and Otep, but their shows are... yeah. They do gross and/or really disrespectful shit. Hot tea or cold tea? THERE ARE SO MANY TEA OR COFFEE QUESTIONS IN SURVEYS but they tend to be different so I just keep them in alsdjf;awe. The usual: I hate tea. Can you swim well? I guess I swim fine? DJ or band, at a wedding? DJ. I want a variety of music. Ever won a contest? A few, don't feel like trying to remember 'em. Ever have plastic surgery? No. Which are better black or green olives? Olives are fucking gross. Best room for a fireplace? Living room. Who was your high school crush? My first was either Sebastian or Kyle. Or Girt. Then Juan, though that crush was questionable if it was serious or not. He really flattered me a lot, but I've told the story before plenty. Idk if the emotion was romantically reciprocated, though honestly I think it was mostly because of his reputation? I only knew him as extremely sweet. BUT ANYWAY, after that, do I even need to say "Jason?" When he came along, whether or not I really liked Juan was totally forgotten. What do you believe happens to us after death? Hell if I know. Have you ever cheated on someone? No. Does the thought of growing old frighten you? More like the thought of my body deteriorating does. Have you ever hurt someone for your own entertainment? um the fuck. I've done it out of heartbreak and pain, but never for my entertainment. What is your favorite song of all time? Of all time, probably "False Flags" by Massive Attack. Has anyone you’ve known died on a holiday? Possibly, idk. If you could write a book, what would it be about? Sometimes I wish I could make a series out of the meerkat RP I engage in, but I don't have the motivation or dedication for that. And I wouldn't be comfortable revising our "tribute" characters for the sake of legality and just respect in general. What are some lyrics that speak to your soul? "For such a little thing, you sure are in your own way" from a Mother Mother song. I'm not exactly small for a human ha ha, but in the scope of the universe perspective, we're all less than microscopic. Have you ever been in love with more than one person at the same time? Not in love, not. Attracted to, yeah. What is the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to you? I remember, though it's a tad blurry, the occasion I was having a serious "grieving session" for Jason at Colleen's house, and her sister was there alone with me. She was talking me through it and grabbed my shoulders at one point, looked me dead in the eye, and told me so firmly yet gently how beautiful a person I was and that I deserved the world and more. I won't forget that, like ever. Do you have any taboo fetishes or preferences? No. What is the thing you are most ashamed of? I've talked about this enough. Well, that or just being a general "this is all your goddamn fault and I am the only victim here" cunt to Jason following the breakup. Actually, yeah, I'm probably more ashamed of that. What is the emotion you seem to feel most strongly? Hm. Embarrassment? Heartbreak? Love? Idk. Do you think of yourself as a unique person? Yeah, honestly. I mean not incredibly, but unique, yeah. What is a movie from childhood that you loved? I've talked about TLK and Finding Nemo and that kinda stuff a lot, so here's a STUPIDLY underrated one: Spirit: Stallion of the Cimmaron. That movie is fuckin beautiful wtf. Are you afraid of death? Aren't we all at least to a small degree? What are your top three biggest fears, actually? Losing my mom, being raped, and all those I love just abandoning me. Do you have an accent of any kind? You can detect a Southern one sometimes. What do you want to be remembered for? Sending a message of love, especially to animals. Are you currently sad about anything? I am literally permanently sad about my weight, though it's not like, an *active* sadness at this very moment? Have you ever changed your spiritual beliefs? Three times now. Catholic to Christian to theist. What is your favorite alcoholic drink? MARGARITAS gotDAMN Do you ever talk to yourself? Sure. Have you ever cried yourself to sleep in your adult life? Oh yeah. What do you think is the meanest thing you’ve ever said to someone? "Thanks for sending me to the ER again." Fucking bitch. Do you have a favorite book? If so, how many times have you read it? Johnny Got His Gun and The Outsiders. Only read both once. I almost never read a book more than that. Have you ever wished you were from another country? Half the time, especially as an adult, I wish I lived in Canada. What are you thinking about currently? My throat is absolutely killing me and I'm ready to leave school. What is a subject that makes you uncomfortable to speak about? I'm more uncomfortable talking about sex than I used to think. Do you have anything you are extremely particular about? When I'm in the passenger seat controlling the music? Oh my god, Mom, DON'T turn the volume down manually. I can do that on my iPod myself, but can only turn it back UP but so loud as it gets lower by the car itself. She knows I turn it down when we're talking, she is, or we slow down, but she does it anyway sometimes and I get unreasonably annoyed by it. Have you ever seen the ocean? Only the Atlantic. What is your most fond memory of your current S.O, if applicable? THE FIRST KISS Y'ALL it was fuckin CHEESY but I LOVE IT Do you find yourself confused often? Oh hell yeah. What was the best time of your life? It's so funny to me how I can answer "2017," the very same year I OD'd. That's rapid growth, my friend. Have you ever been on a cruise? No. Do you miss any of your exes? I only miss the memories of him. Are you religious? I mean I believe in some ultimate creator, but I don't really like calling myself "religious" anymore. I don't worship it, I don't pray to it. I'm thankful to exist, but that's. It, I guess. ANY entity I would respect wouldn't demand me to kiss its feet. Do you think you are attractive? HELL NO. How many people have you slept with? Do you mean like, as in having sex? One. Slightly fooled around with, two, including the previously-mentioned guy. Do you consider yourself a catch? Besides my looks, I do think I'm a good girlfriend. What kind of sauce do you eat your chicken nuggets with? Honey mustard, actual mustard... that kinda stuff. What do you think you could do to improve your life? Get a goddamn job, I'm just really not capable right now. What song is playing right now? "Hag" by Otep. What is your LJ name? I don't have a LiveJournal. I don't even want to EXIST on the same site with a particular fat-headed, bigoted fuck of a bitch. Holy shit I've nearly made an account multiple times JUST to talk that cunt back to Earth. What was the most recent movie you watched? UHHHHHHHH I don't remember actually. How many times have you got stitches? UHHHH twice or thrice? What are your pets’ species and names? I'm excluding the dog I hate because he's not even "mine." Teddy is a beagle/cocker spaniel/probably something else mix. Roman is a cat mix; he seems to have Siamese or something similar in 'im. Mitsu is a fancy rat. Venus is a champagne ball python. What is your most recent musical crush? Mark is a fucking singer, DON'T EVEN @ ME ABOUT IT. Which is better; immense heat or extreme coldness? God, the latter. I literally can't handle like anything above 70 for even like 10 minutes. It's not just that I find heat uncomfortable, but I sweat to a disgusting degree and get extremely weak, dizzy, and sometimes nauseous. Do you have a disease? Just mental ones. I have at least one physical disorder, but not a disease. Do you like gore? BITCH yes. Especially in art. It's the smell irl I can't really handle, as well as seeing like, human gore, but also exclusively in the real world. It feels too personal and close to home, y'know? Do you stutter? YEP. Name a cool person you have lost touch with? Megan, particularly. Who was the friendliest person you have met on the internet? MAN, I don't know if I could pick!! Maybe uhhhh... Megan again? She was nice to like... everyone. Or Connie for the same reason, and she's also chill as hell. I really don't know, I've met a load of great people. Name a song that is overplayed. I don't listen to the radio, so. What websites do you visit frequently? Kalahari Manor, deviantART, YouTube, Facebook, the Silent Hill wiki to make sure it's not exploding from mental cases again to not make it to fucking video game and horror sites/blogs again, and especially lately, Tumblr. There's more, but those are the regularly frequent ones. Does counting sheep help you fall asleep? Never tried. What is the biggest mystery? Where the universe came from and why.

[fleetwooded]

talk about music!!!!!! gimme the whole top ten, then i also want 22, 44, and 88!!

THANK YOU FOR ENABLING ME STEPH!!! this ended up predictably long-winded, so here is the list, and you can click through to read how i feel about all these songs if you want to. if you’re on mobile, and have to scroll through, i’m so sorry. 

1. why, fleetwood mac2. from the dining table, harry styles3. home, one direction4. animal, troye sivan5. i’m yours, pixie geldof6. ambitions, donkeyboy7. bring it on home to me, sam cooke8. bad (live), U29. american tune, paul simon10. 1950, king princess

22. everywhere, fleetwood mac44. trouble, lindsey buckingham88. border, years & years

ask me about my favourite music of the year! 

1. why, fleetwood mac - this is ZERO PERCENT a surprise, i think i’ve fallen asleep to this song every night for the past three years. it is one of my favourite fleetwood songs even though it’s a real niche one - the final track off mystery to me, which is uhhh not one of their more popular albums. but a) i am very fond of the awkward post-peter green pre-lindsey/stevie albums, b) christine mcvie gets paid DUST by everyone, but she is an incredible songwriter with an incredible voice, and really held the band afloat during that era, and c) this song is so gentle and beautiful and i could never ever get tired of listening to it. i’m obsessed with the extended guitar opening, which keeps you waiting for the piano to kick in for ages and makes you instinctively listen more closely to the guitar throughout the whole song. also the lyric well, my heart will rise up with the morning sun / and the hurt I feel will simply melt away is such a beautiful and clearly expressed sentiment. and when those strings come out from the back of the arrangement just before the last stanza!! ugh i love this song.

2. from the dining table, harry styles - honestly this is only so high up because it is one of the other two songs on my sleep playlist and therefore gets played every day lmao. i will say that this is pretty much the only song of his where the studio version is better than the live version, and therefore the only one i regularly listen to after going to his concert bc i don’t resentfully compare it to the live experience. that harmony on the third maybe someday you’ll call me and tell me that you’re sorry too and the strings in that whole section make the entire song worth it. 

3. home, one direction - lol i always say that my favourite 1d song is walking in the wind, but it’s really this one. i was in a very small, l*arry-free corner of the fandom when this came out, so it never had those associations for me, and i just think it’s a very warm and beautiful song and i DO NOT understand why it was not on the album. i also used to listen to it every morning back when i had to walk to work at 4:30am (in the winter! when it was pitch black and i lived in a not-so-great area!), and it was very very comforting to me, so listening to it always sparks that feeling of comfort, like being wrapped up tight in a warm blanket.

4. animal, troye sivan - the last song on my sleep playlist, and one of the best songs off his new album imo. my favourite kind of song is the kind where you can put on big headphones, get on a bus or train, close your eyes, press play, and just have an experience. it’s unquantifiable! everyone’s mileage will vary! you either feel it, or you don’t! but i really really feel it with this one, especially on the second verse. it’s such a stripped back song, but has this rich sonic landscape that just pulls you in if you let it. 

5. i’m yours, pixie geldof - ugh, this album was such a huge and exciting discovery for me this year. i had no idea she made music until i heard woman go wild on one of nick grimshaw’s insta stories and looked it up, and then i listened to her album over and over and over again for months and developed a massive, useless celebrity crush on her. it’s a little bit derivative, definitely nothing groundbreaking, but so perfectly matched to my sensibilities and so endlessly listenable. i also find it very satisfying to hear something and instantly know it’s going to be your new favourite thing, and then get to prove yourself right. i usually listen to the album all the way through, so i don’t think about the specific songs too much, but if i had to pick a favourite, it would be this one!

6. ambitions, donkeyboy - i’m pretty sure i found this song because it was referenced in a fic lmao? if that is the case, a million thank yous to whoever wrote that, because i never would have come across it otherwise. it’s a collaboration between a 2000s norwegian synthpop band and a girl whose only other resume builder was finishing in seventh place on norwegian idol. but it is a BOP, and a bop with a strong emotional drive, which is the best kind. the lyric I can't tolerate / the feelings that I feel when I feel is another one i spend the whole song waiting for. 

7. bring it on home to me, sam cooke - another song i have been listening to for years and years and never tire of. when my best friend moved out of her parents’ house, she said that the only reason she wanted her own place was so she could sit in her living room and play this song on a turntable. she did play it, often, because she only owned a few records for the longest time, so listening to it always brings me back to curling up on her couch and talking and talking while she made me dinner in her tiny and dark but beautiful home. 

8. bad (live), U2 - god i love this song. i think i have talked about it on here before, so i won’t go on and on, but i LOVE this song. tbh i have never actually listened to the album version of this song, and maybe it is just as good, but i really love live albums - when they can capture the spirit and energy and RISK of a live concert, they feel so electric. anything could go wrong at any moment when music is being played live, or it could go SO right, and the artist and crowd could feed off each other’s energy until the whole venue feels alive, and the music could take on a whole new artistic life. idk what exactly it is, but i feel all that potential in this song. it’s eight glorious minutes of that electricity, and every time you think it’s peaked, it just keeps going and reaches new heights. my favourite is the bit where bono just belts out the words desperation, dislocation, separation, condemnation, isolation, desolation, isolation, let it go like a cry out into the universe. i think about it so often. sometimes i also want to just stand in front of a crowd and yell ISOLATION, DESOLATION. i feel that live music can often feel like a purging, or a cleansing, or a transformation - like singing about these feelings of profound misery or pain or anger with a crowd of people who also feel those feelings can reshape them into something joyful and exultant instead.

9. american tune, paul simon - damn, this really was a melancholic year!! this is another of my go-to comfort songs when i am feeling those lost feelings. i listened to it a lot in the winter, and again this fall, and related a little too much to the bits about being so far away from home. it’s got this sense of deep weariness in its lyrics and structure that i like listening to when i am very tired and want to commiserate. the drums leading up to the and I dreamed I was dying are my favourite musical moment, but my favourite lyric is the ending, with: tomorrow's going to be another working day / and I'm trying to get some rest / that's all I'm trying to get some rest.

10. 1950, king princess - honestly, introducing me and the world to king princess is the best thing harry did all year. first of all, it’s truly remarkable how much cultural power he has - not that this song wouldn’t have been successful without him, but literally every write-up and interview mentions him tweeting the lyrics as a mark of approval that propelled her into the public eye. it’s also just an incredibly well crafted song, and i’m endlessly impressed by her talent. to write and perform a song like this at her age is no small feat, and i’m very glad she’s ended up getting the attention she has. i got to see her live this summer with my sister and a few of our friends, and she was every bit as commanding and magnetic as i would have imagined. 

22. everywhere, fleetwood mac - another all time favourite!! at my work this summer, my boss was a very cool woman who played in a very cool all-female punk band. we got along tremendously, except for that she had NO patience for me constantly playing what she referred to as “mom rock.” this one is the only fleetwood mac song she liked, so i would just play it over and over and we would delight in that shimmery little intro. when i was closing, i would put it on just as the sun went down enough to shine right through the big windows at the front of the store, and it feels good to know that i am going to listen to it years from now and remember that summer and that sun.

44. trouble, lindsey buckingham - my fave song of his, except maybe never going back again. i really like this whole album, but this song is another one i just want to burrow inside because it feels so rich and dense. i feel like i have nothing to say about him that hasn’t already been said - he’s a massively underrated guitarist, and a great songwriter, and i just love listening to him play.

88. border, years & years - a fantastic song off a fantastic album. i’m ngl i was a little disappointed by their sophomore album, so i just kept listening to this one. also brings me back to great memories of seeing them live and the catharsis of yelling my heart, it will start to shine / and I will be alright with a whole crowd of people. live music is magic!!

if anyone made it here, thank you for reading. i love year-in-reviews. it feels good to take stock of a year and try to put all the little moments and periods of time in order and make some sense out of them. i also love music, and it feels good to sit down and listen to my most listened to songs with new ears and try to remember or figure out why i listened to them so often. it’s been a long, hard, tumultuous year, but my relationship with music has really flourished, and stuff like this feels like nurturing that love.

[allegra0]

Franz Ferdinand 8-8-18

one of the best concerts i’ve ever been to and basically one of the greatest nights of my life.

sorry this is so long i just love them so much!!!!

I got to the venue around 5:30 when doors weren’t even going to open until 7. Even as I sat outside with only six people ahead of me in line, I was SO anxious about getting front row and I was really afraid that I wouldn't make it. I know this sounds weird, but when they let us into the theater and I bolted for the barrier and actually got it, I felt like I could finally relax for the first time in months.

I loved chatting with the people around me on the barrier! I don’t know any Franz fans in real life so it was nice to be able to talk to people about them.

I really enjoyed POW! They were fun. The keyboard player was cute as hell and her outfit was adorable. I was dying laughing at all the people in the audience who kept randomly yelling POW!!! between songs.

It was surreal when the lights finally went down and they came out. Bob and Paul first, then Julian and Dino...and then Alex, casually strolling onstage with his guitar in one hand and a mug of tea in the other. This video says it all. ♥

I was so happy they opened with Always Ascending! It's one of my absolute favorites of theirs and I feel like it's a great opener with the way it builds up. My memory of this song is a fucking blur because I was mostly just standing there attempting to process the fact that holy shit, this is happening, they're real!!!!! They're fucking real!!!!

They played Come On Home next (which I wasn’t expecting at all!!!) and they dedicated it to a woman in the front row, Reese, for her birthday. :’) Such a lovely song and the fact that they played it for her is amazing.

Alex had to stop during the second verse of Walk Away because he was having some sort of sound issues...they finished the song, but afterwards he had to walk over to the sound guy to get something fixed and he told the other guys to jam and told Bob to start lmao. So they all started awkwardly jamming and laughing and it was cute af.

When Alex came back they played The Dark of the Matinee which was AMAZINGGGG. The intro with Julian and Dino and Alex all on guitar??? So fucking cool. This was the song that sort of lowkey got me interested in them last summer (shoutout to @flakybandit ♥) which made it even better.

Come and dance with me...come and dance with me...now cOME ALL OVER ME MICHAEL

Lazy Boy is so much fucking fun!!! Alex played that shaker thing during the intro (idk what it's called) and then just fucking...flung it onto the floor behind Bob and it landed with a soft chhhk and I was dying. It was also cool to watch him counting out the 10/4 time signature in the middle of the song!

Alex held my hand during the second verse of Glimpse of Love!!!!!!!! aaaa 

It took me a second to recognize Lucid Dreams when they started playing, because I'm more familiar with the version on Tonight, but when I figured it out I fuckin lost my shit. I LOVE THIS SONG SO MUCH.

I was still reeling from hearing Lucid Dreams and then they fucking started playing EVIL EYE. SAJDJSDJ OH MY GODDDD. This song makes me so fucking happy. Screaming “IT'S RED YA BASTARD!!!” is definitely a life highlight.

I know I said that DotM is the song that got me interested in them last summer, but Do You Want To is the song that finally got me hooked on them this spring. I lost my mind a little bit haha. So much fun. They really drew out the “lucky lucky” part, which I loved. Alex was so into it dsjfjsf. Like yeah, Alex, you know what? I am so lucky. ❤️

Ulysses though ;o; I’ve loved that song from the moment I first heard it. I was a junior in college when it came out and I distinctly remember listening to it while walking around campus, rewinding the “you’re never going home” part over and over because I just loved it so much...yeah. Finally getting to hear it live was incredible.

The first song of the encore was Finally!!! This song means a lot to me for various reasons and I'm so happy I got to see it live. The whole band stopped playing during the little breakdown part in the middle of the song and Alex encouraged the audience to sing along. It was quiet because most people didn't know the song haha but he tried. (God, how it feels good to be with people like me.)

Feel The Love Go. Oh my god. I know I say this about a lot of Franz songs but I honestly think this is my favorite song of theirs. Back in May, when I was first getting into FF, I had a really horrible day at work. I felt like such a failure and I honestly wanted to give up and quit teaching forever. I remember listening to this song that night and the next day, and that was the first time I really paid attention to the lyrics. “For the things that you do are not who you are.” “Think of a friend and wish them love. Think of an enemy and wish them more.” It sounds ridiculous, but it spoke to me at a time when I really needed to hear it – and it kind of put some things in perspective for me. I love it so much. It gives me such a good feeling every time I listen to it. And it's so good live!!! Alex's dancing is impeccable, and I absolutely love when he gives his fucking sermons on feeling the energy and the love in the room tonIGHT!!! Fucking magical. ♥

One of my favorite things about concerts is how the energy in the room changes when a band starts playing their most popular song. The Killers with Mr. Brightside, Duran Duran with Hungry Like The Wolf, The Mighty Mighty Bosstones with The Impression That I Get...everyone just seems to come alive. That's how it felt to hear them play Take Me Out. I love it sosososo much. It takes me back to being 15, in a good way haha. Alex and Julian and Dino jumping at the beginning is cute as hell. I love those bouncy boys.

I'm pretty sure Julian noticed me at one point during Take Me Out, since he was in Dino's spot... I smiled at him and did a heart with my hands and he smiled :D

This Fire was insaneee. if you haven't seen FF play it live go check it out here (not my show but it sounded pretty much exactly the same). I loved the extended guitar jam in the middle! When Lexi and I were outside later talking to Alex, she told him how much she loved this version of the song, and Alex said he thought it was great, too! He said it's not always so drawn out, it all depends on whether he and Dino hit the right groove or not, and tonight they did. :D

Getting down on the floor and watching them through the barrier and then jumping up and dancing my ass off is another experience that I'll never forget. Part of me regrets not taking any videos of this, because it was fucking amazing, but I knew I had to just experience it. (Oh, how I burn for you. <3) Some more random observations from during/after the show:

Alex came back out for the encore with a second mug of tea

When he introduced Dino he referred to him as “the man that is loved by every cat in the world” :')

Julian has the longest legs known to man

Also Julian kept randomly giggling throughout the show jdsfjds so cute

Paul and Bob were so far away :( but it was cute to see them looking so focused and intense!

Alex has a nice butt. Thanks for coming to my TED talk

When Dino and I took our picture he leaned his head into mine (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

When I went to take my selfie with Paul we did that awkward thing where we both put our arms up so he was like “Here, I'll go up” sdjfsfj :’)

I wanted to talk more to Bob but I didn't know what to say! At least I got to tell him that the show was amazing and he thanked me :) What a cutie.

This is going to sound weird I think but like...Alex looked really nice in the dim glow of the streetlights in the alley? It really brought out his eyes or something haha. He's just so stunningly beautiful, and it's even more pronounced in person. <3

I almost didn't tell Alex how much their music has helped me this year. Lexi and I had taken our pictures and she was talking to him and he looked like he was about to head over to someone else and I knew it was kind of a now or never thing so I just...fucking did it. He smiled and put his hand on my shoulder and told me how much he likes hearing things like that and he hopes that next year will be better for me. :)

I was SO nervous to talk to them, especially Alex, but they all instantly made me feel at ease. They're just as lovely as everyone said they would be. If any of you ever have the opportunity to meet them after a gig, do it. They’re so kind and genuine and you can tell they enjoy getting to talk to their fans. 

It’s been a week since I saw them now and I’m not gonna lie, I’m sad and I miss them so much. Weirdly, though, I’m comforted by the fact that even though I don’t know where or when, I’m going to get to see them again (and maybe even meet them again!) and that’s enough to keep me going. ♥

[kimonobeat]

natalie.mu Power Push: aiko “Awa no You na Ai Datta” interview

aiko has wrapped up her 11th original album, titled "Awa no You na Ai Datta". It includes her previously released singles "Loveletter", "4 Gatsu no Ame" and "Kimi no Tonari" for a total of 13 tracks, all of which are jam-packed with her honest thoughts and feelings right now.

This album has the most lyrics of any album of hers so far-- what do you think she wanted to say? aiko walked natalie through her thoughts on it in this interview.

(A big thank you to parasmichael for the coffee!)

I wanted to put everything I felt like saying right now out there

──You've completed your 11th album, "Awa no You na Ai Datta (Our Love was Like a Bubble)". When I heard the title I thought it sounded really bittersweet and wistful. And when I listened to the album, there were a lot of songs that made it feel like the only right title.

I'm glad you think so. The words just kinda came to me around the time I'd finished recording about 10 songs and the album was coming together as a whole. There are plenty of bittersweet songs on it. It also includes the song "Cider", which has the words ‘carbonated water’ in the lyrics. I was thinking about the songs on the album and kinda realized: "You know, bubble shapes can be soft, fragile, enveloping... They can have lots of different shapes. They're like love in a way." That’s how I settled on the title "Awa no You na Ai Datta".

──How did you choose the 13 songs that went on this album?

I chose the songs I wanted to sing right now out of all the songs I’d written in the last year or two. A lot of the songs I wrote last year, but I wrote "Ashita no Uta" and "Toumei Drop" this year.

──After listening to all the songs, the lyrics in particular really made an impression on me. It felt like you were laying your true feelings bare in a way you've never done before.

I think that's just because I'm getting older. (laughs) I've always written songs, so you can tell how much more important words are to me now compared to before, and the way I express things has changed. The things I was a little too embarrassed to say in my 20's aren't embarrassing to me now, and no matter how bluntly I show my feelings, I just think to myself, "This is me, this is how I feel." There are probably people out there who think I sing love songs that aren't very appropriate for my age because of how I show those emotions. I don't think there's much I can do 'bout it thought, it's what I feel like sayin' right now. I wrote about whatever I was feeling at the time.

──Doesn't it make you nervous to put your emotions out there in the open like that?

I used to kinda wonder what people thought when they heard them. But it's what I wanted to say. Last year at Zepp Nagoya during the last concert of my tour, I'd given 110% and honestly was ready to just fall apart. But even then, I still would've been happy to do concerts like that every single day. So when I write songs, I really try to include everything I wanna say out.

The longest lyrics of any album so far

──One result of you saying everything you wanted to say is that there are quite a few more words in the lyrics.

There are, aren’t there. (laughs) When I'm at the point where I'm writing lyrics to a song, in my head I'm coming up with notes, or I guess I should say with rhythms. I write lyrics as they come to me and just naturally end up with an A melody, B melody and chorus. I really wanted to stop doing that this time around though.

──So then how'd you do it this time?

Knowing that whatever I write might not end up being in the lyrics, I tried to write everything, good or bad, in paragraphs. Then I ran out of music notes in my brain and kept writing about whatever I'd been thinking, and it just got longer and longer. The result was that this album has the longest lyrics of any album I’ve released so far. (laughs)

──So you write lyrics first when making songs then, aiko? Would you say that the way you put words to music was different because there were more words, too?

I think so. The melodies were different because of the intonation of the words. I had to sing pretty fast too during recording, it was so hard to deliver my lines smoothly. (laughs) There were a lot of words... I really wanted to get it all across though.

──There's a lot of ‘rock’ songs on here too.

As my producers would say, my songs seem to be different genres depending on the time period I made them in. Right now it's been that "band" sound, so a bunch of the songs sound kind of convoluted because there's a lot of words. And ─ maybe this is just what I'm picturing in my head ─ but sometimes I wonder if I'll start singing more quiet ballads as I get older. I'd like to write songs from yet another angle and keep surprising you all. I'm sure I'll want to do something else as I get older too. Maybe there'll even be things I can't do anymore. That’s why I really just wanted to do whatever I was capable of now.

If I ever stop changing or evolving, I'm done for

──When your last album "Toki no Silhouette (Time's Silhouette)" came out, you told us that your real self came through. I felt that whereas it "showed" almost by accident on your last album, you very intentionally "showed" yourself on this one.

That's true. I'd say that I've been changing myself almost every single day since my last album. That probably influenced the songs.

──What kinds of things would you say you’ve changed about yourself?

When I’m talking to somebody, I try to be more aware and say that I will do something and not that I want to do it. When you say you want to do something, you're sharing ownership of it with someone else and end up depending on them to do it, and if you mess up, you find yourself blaming someone else instead. I've run away from things doing that. So now I just say that I'm going to do it and take responsibility for it myself. Maybe that awareness shows in my songs, too.

──I see. Changing your everyday awareness of things changes the way you write lyrics, and as a result your songs have changed as well. This album still has that ‘aiko’ feel to it, and yet it has a different overall image than anything you've done so far. It feels like you've evolved some.

I'm really happy that you feel that way. If I ever stop changing or evolving, then I'd be done so I'd like to keep on changing. Even if it's only the teeniest tiniest amount. Having done this for 15 years now, on the one hand I'd like to keep on going the way I have so far, but on the other hand, I'd also like to try new things. It felt really self-indulgent to just keep on doing the same exact thing. I’d like to do more and more new things because I don't want to depend on that, and I want to make things I'm satisfied with. Also, I guess I'd be done once I can't even get myself excited about a song I've written.

I don't have the time to wait and see

──Did you start thinking this way because some crisis happened that made you feel like you couldn't go on like this anymore?

Yes. For the past few years I've started thinking about just how hard it is to keep making music your whole life, and that someday it'll eventually end. But I'd like to keep making music. Thinking about stuff like that has really made me treasure every single moment that I get to keep making music, and realize all over again that I wanna write songs that sway both my heart and the hearts of the people who listen to my music. I'm the one who creates it from start to finish. If I decide I want to change something, I'm the only person who can make it change in the end. I feel really nervous about the future because I'm not sure how things will go, and I don't have the time to wait and see. Maybe that's a weird way to put it, but thinking of it that way finally made me feel independent and self-reliant. I think consciously changing my "I want to" statements into "I will" has been big for me.

──Was it tough for you to make this album, given the worry and sense of crisis you were feeling?

I didn't really have much time for this one which made it really difficult, but getting to sing the songs during recording and thinking up lyrics on the way on home was fun. It makes me so happy to slowly finish up songs; I just felt so happy. I was especially happy recording the songs for this album. I’ve got so much going on in my life, but there were moments where I just felt so alive once I started working on my music, even when I was feeling down. I really think that making an album as important as this one is to me was the only path I could’ve taken, even if it ended up not being any good.

──And that album kicks off with the track, "Ashita no Uta".

As soon as I finished this song, my heart was set on using it as the first track. I’m the same way with set lists for my concerts: choosing the first song makes me feel like I've finally crossed the start line ─ like, "Yay,  made it out!" There was another song that was supposed to be the first track, but then I finished "Ashita no Uta" and it just totally ousted it. It's the sort of song I'm really glad I made, and one I'm glad I put as the opening number.

──There's this line in the song that goes, "I hope someone will hum it and laugh it off for me / All the way to the other side of the clouds". It really leaves an impression.

Sometimes while writing the song, I’d think to myself, “I feel this way. I wonder if anyone else thinks the same thing?” I hope everyone who hears it hums it every now and then. I want it to be something that belongs to us all. When I was singing it during recording I was able to visualize the scene and thought, "This song will be complete once I've sung it with everyone at a concert."

This album has a proper ending

──The album starts with the song “Ashita no Uta”, then after all these songs expressing various emotions in very realistic ways, ends with the track “Sotsugyoushiki (Graduation Ceremony)”. Why write a graduation song now?

I’ve always been bad at writing songs that like, commemorate things. I get so worked up about it that I can’t write. I can finally reflect back on things now, though. I wrote this song right around graduation season, and wasn’t sure what kind of song I’d be able to write now about such a priceless moment. I ended up overlapping my current self with who I was when I graduated. Graduation ceremonies are dream-like affairs that are over in a flash. It feels like everything’s ending for you then and there, right? We all have to accept that things end, many times in life. You’ve got to face it head on, but deep down you still feel like running away. No one wants to accept we’ve graduated after the ceremony’s over, like we don’t wanna go home from school. (laughs) I wrote this song because I wanted to put that feeling to music.

──Compared to the other songs so far, this one felt the most like a standard aiko number. Why’d you leave this song for last?

I went on quite a few adventures on this album and wanted to leave all the people who’ve listened to my music with one final song at the end that made you think, “Yup, that’s aiko.” When I listened to the album with the finalized tracklist, it just felt right to me. Like, “Ah, this album has a proper ending.” It jumps around in various places and double-jumps sometimes too, but still. (laughs) Ending the album with “Sotsugyoushiki” really made me feel like I’d finished up the album. It’s also a song I picture myself singing at concerts. I can’t wait for everyone to hear it.

──If you had to sum up the album in one word, what would it be?

This album... definitely the word “live”. I wrote about things that had been on my mind until just now, and even now it just feels so “live” to me. Writing so frankly hasn’t all been good so it’s a bitter pill to swallow. Still, the album is full of the things I’d been wanting to say.

I say the word “boobs” so casually

──The album comes with a bonus CD. The Limited First Press Edition comes with “aiko’s Radio side A”, and the Regular Edition comes with “aiko’s Radio side B”. Both feature you talking quite a bit.

Oh, is that okay? (laughs) Radio stuff normally just plays and is gone, along with the times. Is it really okay to save stuff like this on CDs? (laughs)

──I thought it was great, your characteristic indifference really comes through. (laughs) I actually hope you do more like it. (laughs)

Oh geez! (laughs)

──I think one major thing about you is the way you entertain while chatting between songs during concerts, or on the radio. When you were making guest appearances on different radio shows while promoting “Kimi no Tonari”, I was watching listeners reacting to you on Twitter and saw that a lot of people were surprised by what you were like.

Oh, that’s true. When I first started my Twitter account and tweeted about boobs, I was really surprised at how everyone reacted. People were saying all over that my very first tweet was “boobs”. (laughs) I just watched it happen and was like, “Well, that’s just how it’s gonna be I guess.” I felt like I needed to be myself.

──Did you think this bonus CD would show more of yourself?

The staff who do all the radio stuff are the same staff that I've done it with all this time, so they know the darkest parts of me. The first version had more juicy stuff in it... They made it a little bit softer. (laughs) Those staff members keep me under control, but t’s almost like they flip this “Go go go!” switch in me. I hope people get warm fuzzy feelings listening to the bonus CDs.

──You use various music in the background when you’re on the radio.

I do. I use big band performances as background music and to end my concerts with. I also used the song “Radio” which was at the end of my best album “Matome”.

──The LE version and RE versions come with “Koibito Rock version” and “Kagami Rock version” on their respective bonus discs. Why’d you choose those two songs?

It’s something I’ve always wanted to do. I’ve been saying that I’ve wanted to sing a rock version of “Koibito” at concerts with this arrangement for a while now. I sang it at a concert last year and a lot of people told me it was great. So then I thought, why not make it official? “Kagami” also gets the crowd riled up at concerts. Sometimes the crowd sings the last chorus along with me. Hearing everyone sing that for me makes me so happy, it gives me goosebumps every time. I put both songs on there because it would make me so happy if the people who come to my concerts heard these songs and were reminded of them.

The kind of concerts that make you think, “I could travel through time and still have this moment”

──With this album under your belt, your 15th year since debuting as an artist is coming to a close. What’s it been like for you to look back on it all over again?

It was the people around me who let me know it’d been 15 years; I was barely even aware. I never thought it’d be celebrated quite like this. I did 4 tours commemorating my 15th anniversary and got to make an album, but both of those things felt like something I did with everyone else. So much has happened to me all within the same period of time, it made me want to keep changing in different ways so that I can continue singing. If I hadn’t had realized that, I don’t think I would’ve been able to make this album. I got to meet so many different people... It’s been a very important year for me.

──And next month, you’ll be starting another tour.

I am! Well, since this album had so many words, and there were a lot of rock songs on it, it got me and my producer talking about how hard it might be to sing live. But if I hadn’t had that wall to overcome, I wouldn’t have accomplished some brand new things, so I believe it’s been good for me. I’m gonna do my absolute best on tour.

──Would you say that your concerts have been changing along with the progress you’ve made with the album?

I think they have. When it comes to concerts, there’s always gonna be things I keep doing ─ especially the “Ladies! Gentlemen!” thing ─ but unless I keep evolving, I don’t think the audience is gonna enjoy themselves. For example, let’s say the people who’ve always come to my concerts get married and have a kid. They come to a concert once their life has settled down a bit and are reminded of that one time in their life, and yet they can enjoy it in a new way: “I could travel through time and still have this moment”. That’s the kind of concert I want to put on. The more concerts I do, the more I’m constantly thinking about how to make a lasting impression on people’s hearts. I’d love to create concerts all them people who tickets to my concerts can enjoy.

──I can’t wait to see your upgraded concert!

I will change! I will do my very best!

[show-choir-gal]

13 Reasons Why Preference: How You Two Met

Clay: You and Clay met one night when he was on one of his shifts at Crestmont. You went with a few friends for a 'girls night' and as soon as you all walked into the theatre you and Clay's eyes met. One of the girls bought the tickets and you all made your way into the theatre number that was on the ticket. You offered to buy treats and everyone handed you their money and told you what they wanted. You made your way and ordered what they wanted.

"Clay, hm." you said.

"What?" He asked with a chuckle.

"Nothing, it's just a cute name." You replied.

His face got red and a smile started to slowly form on it which in return made you smile.

"Do you come here often? I haven't really seen you around." He asked.

"I just moved back to live with my dad." you replied.

He finished with the snacks and handed over a few napkins, he turned around and you quickly and stealthily pulled out a pen and wrote down your number.

"Clay, you forgot something." You said while collecting the food.

"Oh, I did? I'm sorry, what did I forget?"

"You forgot to ask for my number." You said with a smirk and a wink, you slid the napkin over to him and started to head towards the movie. You looked back and he had a big, cheeky smile on his face when he looked at the paper and he rubbed his neck.

Alex:

You two met when he stumbled upon you in the band room. You were practicing your Oboe solo for the Winter concert but it also an audition piece for the state band. The days to the audition and concert grew closer and closer and you were growing more and more nervous by each passing day. You asked the band director if you could have the band room to yourself to practice during your free period and he agreed. It was the longest period of they day which at first was a great idea in your mind. But mistake after mistake was being made and you grew increasingly frustrated. You replaced the reed to see if that was the issue, and alas, it was part of the issue! You kept practicing the piece over and over again. Marcello Concerto in C minor was the only sound in your mind and in the room, you were fixated on this piece of music, so it was no surprise you didn't hear the door open. You finished the last eight measures and you looked at the sheet music with a pleased smile forming on your face. You let out a sigh of relief.

"Wow, that was amazing." A voice said. It startled you and you fell off the chair and onto the floor. He ran over and helped you back up.

"Uh, thanks *laughs*" You replied as this mysterious boy helped you up. When you were stably on your feet, you looked at the boy and holy hell was he cute. Bleached Blond hair and a gold septum ring, 'He's my type' you thought.

"Is that for the winter concert?" He asked.

"Yeah, and it's my audition song for the state band." you replied.

"Well, if you do what you just did, they'll have to let you in." He said, which made you blush. A few moments of awkward silence passed before another word was broken.

"I'm sorry about scaring you, I'm Alex by the way."

"I'm Y/N. It's fine, I was just so emerged in my music that I didn't notice the door open."

"Hey, this may seem a little too straight forward, but are you busy after school today?" He asked.

"No, why?"

"I was just wondering if you you wanted to go to Monet's and grab a drink and...uh...chill...?"

"If you're trying to insinuate that you're asking me on a date, then it's a yes." You replied with a smirk.

A smile grew on his face and he bit his lip as he walked toward the door.

"I'll meet you at your locker." He said with a wink before he closed the door.

Justin:

You met Justin when you went to a basketball game to support your twin sister Amanda, who is a cheerleader. You always sit right behind her in the bleachers and help her with her hair and makeup. Everyone asks you to join the cheerleading team but it's not really your style. You give her a hug as the team goes up as they announced the home team, which was us. The team did their routine and then our players came onto the court. You scanned the area and your eyes laid upon Justin Foley, and when he noticed you look at him with a smile, he turned to talk to Zach Dempsey and Zach then talked to your sister

The game started and the cheerleading team sat back down, you noticed Zach and Justin glancing in you and your sisters direction fairly often. You tapped Amanda's shoulder.

"Mandy, what did Zach talk to you about?" You asked in a rather hushed voice.

"Oh, Zach said that Justin asked if you were single and if we were actually twins."

The game eventually ended, and the cheerleaders were heading to the locker room to change. You caught up with your sister just before she opened the door.

"I'm driving us home, I'll meet you in the car." She nodded and you headed out.

You were about to unlock the car when you heard two familiar voices.

"Hey Y/N." They said in unison.

"Hey Zach, hey Justin." You responded.

"Is it true that you and Amanda are twins?" Zach asked.

"Well, yeah. We're identical twins. Can you not tell?" You responded.

By the look on his face, he couldn't tell. You laughed and hopped into the drivers seat, Justin made his way to your window.

"I think you're really pretty, would you like to hang out sometime?" Justin asked with a wink and a smirk.

"Sure, here's my number." You replied and quickly jotted down your number and handed it to him.

He took it and smiled this smile that you'd get when you got that box of 48 crayons back in third grade.

Monty:

You met Monty when you stood up for your brother, Tyler, when he was being made fun of. You went to your brothers locker to get one of your books and you moved down the stairwell and saw a crowd around Monty and some kid. Normally you'd just go around, but your class is right where they are. You pushed to the front of the crowd and saw Monty making fun of some curly haired boy, but you saw the camera under the water fountain and your heart sank, it was your brother.

"What kind of faggot takes pictures?" "Why don't you just fucked in the ass like every gay kid likes." and even more remarks were made, but they stung you.

"Shut the fuck up Montgomery." You yelled and stepped into the circle, your history book in your right hand.

"You need your nerdy little sister to save you? C'mon baby, let's fuck so you can actually be a normal person." Monty smirked.

Something snapped inside you. You gripped the bottom sides of your history book and put all your force into a baseball swing towards his head. The book made contact and was sent to the ground, a huge thud and a gasp erupted from the crowd. You looked down at Monty, who had gushing from his nose and lip.

"Don't you ever mess with my brother and I again." You said.

You grabbed Tyler's camera, put you book in the crook of your arm, and grabbed Tyler and walked out of the school and to your car. You texted your parents what happened and that you're coming home and you were comforting Tyler who was in the front seat.

Jeff:

You met Jeff when he sat next to you before Chemistry started. Jeff normally doesn't acknowledge that you exist, nevertheless sit next to you.

"Hey Y/N." He said with that world famous smile of his.

"Hey?" You replied, you have a crush on him but why was he talking to you?

"I know this is kinda weird, but you're really good at this whole periodic table stuff and I really need a really good grade on this test to stay on the team. Do you think you could tutor me?"

"Yeah, of course! When are you free?" You asked.

"I know this is very last minute but I'm free after school today, I can drive you to my place if that's alright for you."

"Yeah, that's fine. I'll just need to text my sister that I won't be home when she gets off the bus."

"Awesome, thank you so much! Just follow me when class is over."

Jeff stayed next to you the entire class, you never knew he was struggling in chem, but when I looked over he gave that very confused look to the paper as the teacher was teaching us about about the periodic table and how the test will be on every single element on the periodic table. The class went by in the blink of an eye. You packed your bag and followed Jeff to his car. You hopped into the passenger seat. He drove away and he started small talk, but you noticed that his hand was hovering about the stick which was odd but you didn't really think much of it. Once we made it to his house, we got out of the car and he unlocked his front door. He showed you around his house and then we finally landed in his bedroom. We hopped onto his bed and you began helping him with what he needed.

Two hours later and most of what has been taught is actually making sense to him. He knew almost every element group and what each elements properties are. He offered to drive me home since I live on the other side of town. We got back into the car and he started driving to my house.

"What do you want to do when you get out of high school?" He asked.

"I really want to be an analytical chemist, this is going to sound so cheesy, but I've wanted to be one since I was a little girl." He smiled at the response.

"That's not cheesy, that's cute. You're really cute when you talk about chem." He said, he looked like he regretted what just came out of his mouth. You blushed.

"What do you mean by that?" You asked, genuinely wanting to know and see if I could get information from him that he was obviously withholding.

"Well, you have this really sweet smile when you talk about anything chem, even in class you get a huge smile on your face. And you had this spark in your eyes when you were teaching me and helping me. You're just, so cute."

You were blushing, your face was beet red and you had this huge and stupid smile plastered across your face.

"I remember back in fifth grade, Monty spread the rumour that you liked me. I can't believe I'm even admitting this, but I always wished it was true even though we never really talked." He said, his face growing almost as red as mine.

Zach:

You met Zach when you were covering a shift at the local diner. The girl you're covering for got the stomach bug and can't stand up without puking her internal organs out.

Your shift was about to end so you were cleaning up a tad bit so the next persons life wasn't too bad, but as you were cleaning, the basketball team at your high school piles in, one-by-one. You were the only available person to wait tables so you had to drop the cleaning supplies, pick up the notepad and pen, and head over.

"Welcome to Rosie's Diner, are you ready to order?" You asked with a smile. You noticed that Zach was staring at you, not in a creepy way, like an admiring way.

The boys told you their orders one by one until it came to Zach, who was too zoned out staring at you to notice anything around him.

"Yo Zach!" Justin said as he snapped his fingers to get him out of his trance. "I think he wants a piece of you." Justin said, laughter erupting from the table, and a nervous laugh and a flushed face was gained from Zach.

You handed the cook the orders and brought their drinks and then continued cleaning. The bell rang with the food and you brought the meals to the table and continued to go back to cleaning. You looked up when you heard the boys snickering and looked up at you and back to snickering, but you just brushed it away. Moments later, you heard someone clear their throat. You looked up, it was Zach.

"Here's what we owe." He said as he handed over the stack of money and the receipt.

You looked at the receipt to see the tip, there is a phone number on the bottom. You looked up.

"Call me?" He asked.

You simply nodded your head with a smile and he smiled back and went to his boys and they all clapped and left. 'Picking up shifts are too bad' you thought to yourself.

Tony:

You met Tony when your car broke down in front of his house. Your car started screwing up and making weird noises and you pulled over. Steam started coming from under the hood. You shut you car off and slammed your palms against the steering wheel. Moments later, you heard a knock on your passenger window. You got out of the car and walked over to the cute guy with black hair.

"I work on cars, yours seem like it really needs help." The guy said.

"Yeah, I was just driving and it kind of just shit the bed." You said with a chuckle and scratched your arm.

He lifted the hood and started fiddling with a few things before saying anything.

"This isn't an easy fix. This should take a few days. I can fix it up for free and I can drive you home." He said.

"That would be amazing. Thank you." You responded

Tyler:

You met Tyler during photography class. There was a partner assignment and you ended up getting paired up with Tyler. You two had never talked so this was a new friendship opportunity.

You two sat together on the bleachers after school to discuss what we were doing. It was an open assignment but you still needed to plan something.

"I was thinking taking pictures of you in the sunflower field a few towns over." He said, fidgeting with his camera.

"Why me?" You asked.

"You're basically model status. You're gorgeous, why wouldn't I use you as the subject?" He said, you blushed. "Cute girl, cute field, cute pictures. Perfect." He said with a smile.

Requests are still open!

Masterlist

Who and What I can write

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[almost-sweet-music]

I honestly just melt when I hear 2D sing! Get i get a fluff with the s/o just becoming a puddle?

This is by far the longest I have ever kept a request in my inbox and anon, HOLY FUCKING SHIT AM I SORRY FOR THIS. No, seriously I fucked up. I was attempting to write this three times and each time I got to like… 400 words and realized that it was utter shit. THIS TIME I am semi fine with how it turned out so I’m uploading it.

This was also the last request I had pending but I can’t yet open them since my friend from school wanted me to write her an imagine about Hank Mccoy from the x-men so that’s what I’ll be doing for probably the rest of the week :/

Anyways, enjoy!

Warning: Some sexual innuendos but it’s barely 2 sentences.

Y/F/N if your friend’s name

“Aww c'mon Y/N, it’ll be fun I promise!” Your friend chirped in your ear, trying to convince you to come to some concert with her. She’s been praising them for over an hour now, determined to make you come. She was saying how awesome their music is, how great the people are and something about a…. Satanist? And about some possessed guy? You were hella confused by now but to be honest… You were starting to give up.

“What even is that band anyways? I have no clue what they even do.” You Sighed sipping your tea and typing away on your laptop.

“They’re great, I’m telling you. Besides, after the show we can go get some drinks at a bar nearby.” She wiggled her brows at you. You glanced up at her and smiled shyly. “Ah see? There we go. It can be our…. Ladies night.” She skipped around the room and put on her shoes. “I think you’re going to like the frontman. He’s… Your type.”

“What do you mean my type? I don’t have a type…” You look up from your computer slightly offended by her tone.

“Mmmm yeah you do.” She grinned and left your flat in a victorious prance. You sighed and pinched the bridge of your nose. How in the hell were you supposed to say no to her?

______

You looked at yourself in the mirror and pouted. You turned to your friend.

“Be honest, do I look like a slut?” She looked up from her phone and glanced over you.

“Yeah, you look like you’re ready to gobble up some reaaal cock.” You scoffed at her and blushed. She giggled. “Just kidding! You look perfect. I mean, I’d tap the shit out of you.”

“Jesus Christ Y/F/N…” You turned back to the mirror.

“Hey, you wanted me to be honest, I was honest. Besides, you said it like being a slut is a bad thing. C'mon everyone likes sluts. The only people that don’t, don’t get any.” She said and stood up. She walked over to you and hugged you from behind. “Look at my girl. Finally leaving the house for once in her god damn life.” You huffed and pushed her away. She snorted and pranced out of the room. “C'mon slut, the cab’s here.” You rolled your eyes and picked up your purse, following her outside.

______

You were already hot and sticky. A crowd of people surrounded you as you all waited for the band to come on stage. Y/F/N stood next to you, all giddy and stuff, way more excited than you. To be honest, you were so regretting this… You were dreaming of coming back home and never going on a concert like this ever again.

The hall went black. Music started playing and some time later a group of four entered the stage. It was still all black but judging from the silhouettes at least one of them was a definite girl.

A very much british sounding voice started to greet the crowd and say some random stuff you didn’t honestly care about, still mentally far, far away in the warmth of your bed.

The lights went back on and only then did the scene grab your attention.  Your eyes skipped from person to person trying to see as much as you could through the sea of hands. Indeed, as you predicted, one of them was a girl. Pretty one I’m fact. The drummer was a slightly heavier, dark skinned man with completely white eyes but a really nice smile. The frontman, standing behind the microphone had blue hair and…. Pitch black eyes. No iris… Just pitch black. You were confused… Was this the guy Y/F/N was talking about? And lastly, the bassist. He had jet black hair and he was… He was just straight up green.  It could’ve been body paint but… It looked so real??

Minutes later the proper concert started and no joke… You were blown away. The music was great just as your friend told you. It had nice melodies a practically every song was different from the other. The blue haired boy was a great singer and since the first song, you couldn’t get your eyes off of him. It was like he was putting you in some sort of trance like state. The way he sang, especially the slower songs made you putty and for god’s sake you swear you locked stares with him for a second.

You sort of knew that Y/F/N was looking at you and smirking, but you chose to ignore it an not give her the satisfaction she wanted.

___

“See? I bloody told you you’ll like the guy didn’t I?” Y/F/N skipped next to you, on your way to some pub nearby. You rolled your eyes.

“Oh please, who told you I like him?” She huffed.

“Y/N… I saw it in your eyes. You were UNDRESSING him with them.” You punched her arm.

“I was not!”

“Sure lady, lie to yourself as much as you like but I know what you’ll be doing after you come back home and who’s name you will be moaning at night…” You groaned.

“Y/F/N, please.”

“Oh. so you’re not denying it?”

“Yes of course I’m denying it!” She laughed. You two entered a pub that was just around the block from the place where the concert took place. It was a bit crowded but not that much and you found a table easily.

“So, you sit here, look pretty and try to scoop out some hot peeps kay? I’ll get the drinks.” Your friend said and left you on your own. Some time later she came running back, with no drinks but the biggest grin on her face. She slammed her hands on the table. “Forget the hot peeps, I have someone I’d like to introduce you to.” You were confused bit didn’t even have time to ask questions before getting tugged through the group of people by your wrist. Somewhere in the distance you saw a glimpse of blue hair and you immediately stopped, pulling Y/F/N back a step. “Y/N?!”

“Please don’t do this to me.” You said and tried to pull away.

“Oh come on Y/N! He’s a great guy, I talked to him. He said it’s okay to introduce you! Please, come!” You cringed at the thought of having to speak with a stranger like that but in the end succumbed to her.

You stopped in front of the guy from before. You clutched onto Y/F/N’s hand and hid behind her back. She tapped his shoulder and pushed you forward a bit.

“Hey so this is the chick I’ve been telling you about. Her name is Y/N and she’s pretty damn cool and she’s been looking at you the whole evening so yeah. I’m just gonna leave you two now and I gotta blast!”  She said, seemingly in one breath only before letting go of your hand and jogging away.

“Wh- Y/F/N??” You called out to her.

“Gotta blast!” She giggled and gave you the thumbs up before running out the building. You were speechless and frozen in place.

“What the…” You whispered.

“Your friend is really… Jumpy isn’t she?” Blue haired guy said. You felt yourself grow hot. What were you supposed to do now?

“I uh… Yeah…” You turned to him. “Listen… I’m sorry for this I uh… Won’t ruin your fun and I’ll just leave okay? Great show by the way I’m a fan-” Just as you were going to leave, you felt a big hand grab your.

“Oh, no please stay.” You blushed and looked down. Your hand was intertwined with his, bigger one. He noticed you staring and pulled it away. “Sorry. No but seriously, stay. I’d love to chat a bit with you Y/N.” You kept silent for a second before sitting down next to him awkwardly.

And you chatted. A lot in fact. You talked about everything and anything and nothing and the conversation didn’t seem to want to end to the point where his band mates left and he stayed with you. Finally after an hour or so you decided to go home and Stu - that you just learned, has volunteered to walk you home.

He pulled out a cigarette and lit it.

“Ya smoke?” He asked. You shook your head and continued to walk alongside him. “So… Which song did ya like the most?”

“Hmm? Oh. I liked a lot of them similarly. I really liked the slow kinda sad one. Busted and…. Blue?” He smiled.

“Yup. That’s the one.” He looked at the moving ground and sighed happily. There was a pause where you were both just walking silently when suddenly you heard a faint voice sing. “Where does it come from?When everything was outsideBusted and Blue”.  You glanced as in awe at Stu who started to silently sing. He looked up at you and smiled shyly.

You got that feeling again. That warm flutter in your belly that made you all giddy inside. Your legs felt like they were made out of jelly, ready to give out at any moment.

“All my life

All my lifeBeam a lightOn me I am a satelliteAnd I can’t get back without you.” The way he looked at you when he sang that, although the thought was completely foolish and almost certainly wrong, made you feel like he sang it to you specifically. That probably wasn’t true, given that you just met a few hours ago but you liked to think it was. You blushed at the thought and continued to listen and walk along silently.

He finished not long after. You grinned and clapped a couple times.

“Bravo. That was great! Honestly I’m kind of angry I didn’t discover you guys earlier.” Stu chuckled.

“You seem pretty nice. Nicest person I’ve met in a while actually.” He said, putting his hands in his pockets. You smiled and tucked a strand of hair behind your ear.

“You think so?”

“Yeah. Well I mean… I live with a guy that fractured both me eyes and kidnapped me a couple times. On top of that he’s generally pretty mean. Real bastard that one. He’s green too.” He turned his head over to you. “Uh, you a'ight?” Your mouth has fallen agape and you were speechless. “Luv?” You closed your mouth.

“Sorry I was just… You… Actually live with that person? And you didn’t do anything about the abuse?”

“Well, no…”

“D- Stuart…. Do you know how much money you can win in court after all that guy has done? Why didn’t you sue him yet??” You were almost shaking in anger. How did he manage to not do anything all these years?

“I uh… You know, he was in jail once. Besides he’s been through some tough stuff too. He’s not that bad really. Jus bad temper. He really loves Noodle though. Seriously, she’s like a daughter to him. I’m sure she wouldn’t be happy if he was gone.” Stu said and looked at you with a soft smile.

“But… Okay, what about moving?”

“Wha bout it?”

“Well, why can’t you just move away? At least you wouldn’t be living in the same house as that guy.” Stu chuckled.

“Maybe someday…” He sighed. “Is your place far away?” He asked.

“No actually, just around the corner.” You pointed in the distance to the big building where you lived.

“Oh. I’m kind of sad actually. I enjoyed your company t'night.” He admitted.

“So did I!” You replied.

A minute or so later you were there, by your door.

“So uh… See you soon I guess.” Stu said.

“Hopefully!” You said cheerfully.

“Hey uh actually… Can I get your number? I’d really love to see you again.” You agreed and quickly exchanged numbers before, 2d had to leave. You came back to your flat and immediately flopped in the bed, screaming into your pillow.

____

You got a text from Stu, early in the morning. It was a video.

“Hello Y/N! It’s Stuart Pot, recording from the studio. I’m currently doing audio for a new song I made myself and it’s called Sleeping po-” He got cut of by a voice you recognized as Murdoc.

“Aye, faceache!We got work to do!” 2d turned around and yelled

“Shut up gobshite, I’m doing something!” You giggled and bit on your finger “So yeah, we’re recording a new song, it’s called Sleeping Powder and I just wanted to say that I miss you a lot and I love you and I’ll see you, very very soon! 2d signing off!” He smiled wide and the video finished and after that, you couldn’t stop grinning til the end of the day.

[halalhyungwon]

1-100 odds

Jaz you’re a real one

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk?

It depends on the cereal, tbh. Some cereals I prefer a lot of milk and others I put less

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books?

I’ve used my phone, random sheets of paper, pens/pencils, white out tape…

5: are you self-conscious of your smile?

A lil bit

7: do you name your plants?

I don’t have any plants :( If i did, I probably would

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself?

Yes, I do it constantly

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends?

Inner joke? Like, inside joke?… I have a lot. And yet, I can’t think of one to share lmao

13: what’s something that made you smile today?

I was on the phone with my bestie for like 5hrs and I hadn’t called them in a while so that made me happy (: 

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is!

“A total of 32 monkeys have flown in space.”

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair?

This shade of purple that Minseok had because it is sooo pretty. I’ve wanted to dye my hair that color for the longest time

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it?

I do have a journal and I used to write in it regularly but kinda stopped once I got into sophomore year of college. It was kinda my brain dump and also where I just spilled all my emotions that I never talked to anyone about

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces.

Favorite?? Hmmm there’s the bag my cousin bought me for my high school prom. It’s cute and small and white and going over your shoulder. I don’t use it much but I’m still happy to have it.

23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations?

watch exo and seventeen make fools of themselves lmao

25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into?

I don’t recall breaking into anywhere…but I remember one summer my brother and I went for a walk to a school in my cousin’s neighborhood and an alarm went off and scared tf out of us

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor?

wintermint (?) i think it’s called

29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? 

One of my friends has this pack of cards that says “I LOVE YOU BECAUSE” and then it has a bunch of bullet points for different reasons you could love someone. She gave me one sophomore year and another one just recently and honestly it’s so sweet

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks.

Socks and I…we acknowledge each other’s existence and hang out when we need to. I only where socks with my sneakers and boots, and when it’s really cold. I cannot where socks all day. Like it’s impossible. When I wear socks I just feel hyper aware of the fact that there is cloth on my feet and it makes me uncomfortable. I can’t go to sleep with socks on, unless I’m extremely tired and just fell asleep. Even then, I’ll wake up with my socks kicked off in the morning.

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends.

Most recently! My friend and I were trying to observe the meteor shower last weekend. And like the thing is for the first hour or so we didn’t see any and kept trying to find the best place to observe them. Then, I finally saw one, but it was right when my friend was looking down so she didn’t get to see it! And then, another hour or so passes and it just seems like we’re never gonna see another one, so we decide to head back to our dorms. BUt, on the way back we find a spot that would be just perfect to see them, so we just loitered there for almost another hour, jammin to music and just waiting to see some shooting stars! And then the next one comes but it happens right as I’m looking at my friend to talk to her, but she’s looking up so she gets to see it. After that some time passes and it’s already 3:30 a.m. and I’m tired and lowkey gotta pee, so we start making our way back to the dorms again. And then we find another spot that would be good viewing, so we chill there for a while because, though we’ve both seen a shooting star, we haven’t see one together. So we’re standing there, chillin, being goofs and listening to trap remixes of the Wii theme, when we both look up and go “OH!!!” and freak out bc we finally saw another shooting star and it was just great. 

(I realized I answered this even tho it’s not odd but i’m just gonna keep it bc i love it too much)

33: what’s your fave pastry?

do cinnamon rolls count as pastries?…i could really go for one…

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often?

Yes I do!! But I don’t have many :(( Part of me wants to buy a big set but like I already have a bunch of pens and notebooks (but they arent all aesthetic and pretty and stuff) and I also think i’d stop using them after a week or so

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean?

I like having a neat room (I cleaned my room today I’m so happy, it looks so spacious) 

39: what color do you wear the most?

Black, probably

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving?

I don’t read often but I think the last book I really enjoyed … Howl’s Moving Castle

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with?

@batmanlemonade hey ;) [see #32]

45: do you trust your instincts a lot?

No? maybe? idk

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe?

pickles…

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought?

I wishhh I could just buy all the cd’s i’ve ever wanted. If I had more money I probably would have a nice collection. The last CD i’ve bought was back in high school and I think it was OneRepublic’s Native album

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them?

My little brother… whenever i hear transformer, touch it, monster or kkb I think about him bc those are his favorite exo songs loll

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them?

I don’t think I’ve watched any of these but beetlejuice, and I love beetlejuice

55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point?

I scrolled through my kyungsoo tag for a good hour or so to prove to my friend how much i love him sfdjkl; that’s not very dramatic but it’s the first thing I thought of. She really didn’t question that I loved him, I just love any excuse to look through my tags

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics?

bohemian rhapsody is a classic sfkl; um it always reminds me of my childhood bc my brothers and i used to watch these animated videos and one of them was of bohemian rhapsody but with megaman characters lmao

59: what’s your favorite myth?

UHmmm I really don’t know lol sorry

61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received?

In sophomore year I wanted to buy my roommate her favorite flavor of ice cream but I didn’t have money so I drew ice cream on a post-it note for her I can’t think of a stupid gift I’ve received…

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be?

lol no, i just let ‘em be. they’re chillin

65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with?

my cousin who’s in med school, I haven’t seen her in too long :c

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel?

I kinda like those days. If I’m in a good mood, gray skies, cool breezes and light rain make me feel better. Otherwise, it’s just meh.

69: what are your favorite board games?

There’s this Korean board game that I can’t remember the name of for the life of me, and tbh since I haven’t played it in a while I don’t remember the exact rules, but it’s kinda of like Sorry! I’ve only played it twice but it was really fun both times

71: what’s your favorite kind of tea?

Chai

73: what are some of your worst habits?

putting myself down and procrastinating

75: tell us about your pets!

I don’t have any :-( I’ve been really wanting a cat lately

77: pink or yellow lemonade?

Pink~

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you?

Hmmm when I was in high school I reeeally loved Michael Buble (I still do, have you heard that man’s voice?) so for Valentine’s day, my friend got me this box and taped his face on the top lmaoo with a reference to one of his song lyrics. The box was filled with flowers and chocolate and gum (but at the time I had braces so i couldn’t even chew the gum lolll)

81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of.

I really wish I could but I’m not creative and this headache I have isn’t helping safhjlk sorry

83: what’s some of your favorite album art?

I really like the cover for 1R’s Native album, and also p!atd’s too weird to live too rare to die

85: do you read comics? what are your faves?

Not really, but I’d like to

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives?

Howl’s Moving Castle, Room No 7 starring Do Kyungsoo, coming out November 15 and..I can’t really think of another one

89: are you close to your parents?

Kinda sorta

91: where do you plan on traveling this year?

i have no plans to travel :( 

93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most?

My hair in it’s natural state lol covered by my hijab

95: what are your plans for this weekend?

Chillin! I was supposed to lock myself up in my room and finally watch the exo and seventeen concerts I have downloaded but i haven’t gotten around to watching them yet. But I have been chillin in my room so it’s been alright

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house?

infp, scorpio, and i have no idea

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them.

UHhhmmm Call Me Baby and Heaven by EXO; Healing and Don’t Listen in Secret by Seventeen; Hug Me by Jung Joon Il

[mstakitakeshima]

170729 Put Your Teen Top 7 Concert @ KBS Arena Fan Account

We arrived at the venue 2 hours before the concert. First we claimed the tickets we bought at Hanatour then placed our gifts in the gift box. (We soon thought that we could've left the gift for Ricky at his parents' restaurant (BHC Chicken) and C.A.P's gifts at his sister's cafe (Coco Valley)--both places we visited days after the concert.

After putting our gifts inside the boxes, we walked back out and my friend, Lyn (@YooByungChan) purchased some of the merchs. All the while, I was trying to listen to the annoucements of the staff.

Soon, I heard the word "Standing" and I know that that's our cue to approach the staff and ask about where to line up. While in line, I met @Hedgehog_1104, an awesome awesome Angel, C.A.P fan, and the woman behind some of the most awesome fan-taken photos and videos of C.A.P. She helped us purchase our concert tickets and so, I asked her to meet me at the venue just so I could thank her. I gave her chocolate mango from Lyn and she gave us hand fans with C.A.P's handsome face on it. Soooo happy!

Before walking inside the venue, we were arranged by the numbers in our tickets. Yep. Even though we're standing, we're still very organized. :)

By the gate, we were handed this: 

The concert started almost on time. It was a little past 6PM when all the lights went out and "Love Is" started to play. I don't have a copy of the setlist but if I remember correctly, they sang at least 5 songs in a row. Teen Top's stamina is almost unbelievable. This is the fourth time I've watched their concert live and I am always in awe at how strong their lungs are. Wow! Just wow!

They introduced themselves and talked for a while, laughed, and joked around. After that, they sang and danced again. Ricky was so sweaty that his undershirt was sticking to his body. Yep. We are that near to the stage that I can see this. Also at some point, I got a peek at Niel's chest tattoo since I think 2 of his undershirt buttons are undone.

There was a part when one of them asked someone to dance as though they're "clubbing". I forgot who but it soon went down to Niel. Haha. So he was asked to dance in the middle and he did. It was a silly dance that made everyone in KBS Arena extra happy than we already are.

In the middle of Niel's "clubbing" dance, Chunji went to join him but as soon as he did, the music stopped. Chunji then whined and  asked, "Wae?!" C.A.P, laughing, said that the director doesn't want him to dance, so he stopped the music. Chunji was still sulking when he went back with the rest. This is soooo funny. HAHAHA!

Next to do the "clubbing" dance was C.A.P. Here's a video of bouncing baby boy, Minsoo. Hahaha

The boys interacted with the fans a lot! Their relationship with K-Angels is really beautiful. Ricky kept on waving and smiling and talking to fans. I also saw Niel, Chunji, and Changjo doing this. There was a part when C.A.P asked a fan about her thoughts about the concert so far and the Angel replied: "Minsoo so handsome!" C.A.P laughed but said that she's saying nonsense then asked another fan. This fan then said something like, "It's fun or she's having fun." Angels screaming and telling C.A.P that he's handsome didn't stop there. Once, C.A.P asked a fan to get out the venue after telling him that he's soooo handsome. C.A.P was laughing when he said this and the boys are laughing with him. Sooooo cute! :))

Again the lights went out and a video was played. It was like a look back from Clap to Supa Luv days, NMPOY, and so on. It's so obvious that they've cut all of L.Joe's parts. Not one frame showed him and I couldn't help but feel nostalgic.

The first video began by showing a letter T, the second video began with a letter E, the third with another E, then an N, then T, O, and lastly, P. TEEN TOP. Every time a video ends is a performance. First was Ricky for his solo stage.

Ricky went out again in the extended stage, near where we're standing which was really wondeful! :) He changed into a dark blue long-sleeved button down shirt and he's still sweating! Haha. He had his eyes closed during most of the song because, I think, his sweat is getting in his eyes. But his voice really did improve a lot! So proud of baby Ricky. :)

Here’s a fancam: 

I like the part when K-Angels started chanting Yoo Changhyun during the first part of the song. I only hear that on fancams but this time, I was part of that crowd. It's truly great to be there. :)

Next came Chunji, looking so pretty with his light colored clothes. He sang "Marry Me". Here's a fancam:

Again, he performed on the extended stage. The first time he laughed while singing, it was because he missed the right tune and struggled with the lyrics. Just like with Ricky, Angels started chanting "Lee Chanhee". During a short break in the song, Chunji let go of the laughter he's been keeping in and the fans grow wild. He's soooo cute! And his voice, wow! I fell in love with Chunji that night. And Lyn, well.. she's a Chunsa and I can see her melting right where she's standing while Chunji sings, in his sweet sweet voice, "Marry Me." Superb!

Third solo stage went to Niel. My first reaction when I heard his voice was, "Wow! Niel so hot!" Watch the fancam here. That distinct voice, that angst, the mature vibe.. it's porn waiting to happen. I didn't know the lyrics of the song then, so all I got was the melody, how he interpreted it, and his voice! Niel's voice is really unique and eargasmic.

Niel was dressed in all white and he has this dancer wearing all black and dreadlocks dancing around him. Another fan later interpreted it on Twitter as: "Like an inner demon wanting to get out." Well thought of concept, I must say, now that I know the lyrics of the song. Check it here.

Fourth stage goes to giant maknae, Changjo. Teen Top grew to be a group of good looking and hot men. Changjo. Wow. This boy. Here's a fancam:

He first sang a very beautiful ballad and just like Ricky's, Changjo's voice also improved a lot! I've been a fan since 2012, so I kinda witnessed them grow mature each passing year and with it, saw their talents get sharper and better year after year. :)

The ballad was short and he soon asked the crowd to "help him" with his performance. He said, as you can watch in the video: "When I say, You get me high, you say, Get me!" And so, we all sang with him and it was awesome! He moved to the upper stage for the next song which was perfectly fine because up there, we can better see the choreo and boy was it soooo sexy! Damn, maknae!

The sequence of the solo stages has been well thought of as well. It started with Ricky's and Chunji's ballad songs, followed by Niel'emotional and angstsy number. Changjo followed suit with his ballad then dance song which lightened up the mood. He also had a little rap which prepared us for C.A.P's stage. My favorite part, of course. *wink wink

C.A.P first appeared on the upper stage where he stayed until the first song is almost done. He also had the longest solo stage. As you can see in this fancam, his stage lasted for over 7 wonderful minutes.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FUR3ZvOeoM4

Everything about C.A.P spelled H-O-T. The sunglasses with that nerdy string, the lose white shirt tucked in by the belt buckle, the ripped black skinny pants, the tattoos, THAT FACE!, and of course, that voice. That unmistakable deep voice. Ugh!

This may be a little too bias but I love love love C.A.P's solo stages because then, he's all by himself, doing the thing he loves which is rapping. It's a feast to see him being passionate over his craft. He'd be raising his voice, he'd be screaming, all the while staying in tune with the beat. I just... I have no other words to describe it but beautiful. Simply beautiful.

After his first song, C.A.P said, "Sorry if it was too hiphop, the next song will be quieter" or so I thought I heard him say. Hehe. Next song came and it's still very hiphop. Haha. But I love it. Because I love hearing his voice, I love seeing him dance, see him move, and because I can see that he's enjoying every second of it. Ah.. I love him. :))

The sixth video came and after that, all five of them went up the stage once again, coming from different directions. Changjo came from behind us while the other four went up the stage from different directions as well. It's party time!

I may not remember it chronologically but I do remember that after the solo stages, the peformances got better and better. Teen Top jjang! They sang songs from the new album, High Five and when it's time for I Love Girl, I was giggling. It's because in one Teen Top On Air video of their Japan concert, I saw the choreo and it was soooooo hot! Seeing that live is waaaaaay over the top. I almost couldn't handle the sexiness. Wow! I haven't seen fan cams of this, so if you have, can you send me the link so that I can update this? :))

For the next segment of the concert, the boys introduced this certain DJ who then took over the stage while the boys go backstage to rest and prepare for the next round of performances.

This part was also sooo much fun. The DJ played Teen Top songs one after another with the beat turned up and the lights dancing along the music. It's like we were all transported into a club and it was the awesomest club ever because it's all Teen Top songs. So we all sang and danced along. Sooo much fun!

The boys came back out after that and it's an all out party! Teen Top turned their concert into a party. To name a few songs that I remember, they performed Hot Like Fire (changing "Welcome to L.Joe airlines with Teen Top airlines), Why, Oh Good!, Get Crazy, ugh! I forgot the others but do you see where I'm getting at? They performed dance songs after dance songs and we all jumped up and down and danced along with them. It's one great party!

After that set, they went backstage and Angels started chanting "Encore! Encore! Encore!"

Of course there's an encore. I think they performed Rocking, Crazy, and a few others. During Rocking, Chunji danced alone in the middle while the others stare at him and laugh. Haha.

Oh! During "July", we put up the banners that were given to us when we entered the venue and after the song, Ricky thanked all of us. We can see from his face and hear from his voice that he was moved by it. Aww.. ever the emotional one, Ricky. :))

When it was time for the traditional selca, we know that the concert is almost done. But I'm still waiting for them to sing "Angel", so when they left the stage and the lights went on again, I was a little sad that they didn't sing it. Maybe because it was already the background song in one of the videos? But still! It's Teen Top and Angels' national anthem. :(

But all in all, it was a wonderful party, I mean, concert. Soo much fun! For years, I've been watching fan cams and DVDs of Teen Top's Seoul concert and I've always believed that their Seoul concerts are waaaaay better and extra special than their concerts in other countries. I've watched them in Thailand, Philippines, and Taiwan and I can say that their Seoul concert is, indeed, the best!

That dance song medley is the killer. I really hope every Angel in the world gets to watch Teen Top live in Seoul. It's almost magical. :D

Lastly, I would like to take this chance to say this:

Kudos to all fansites for taking photos and videos so that all international fans, and even Korean fans who weren't able to watch the concert live, still get a glimpse of what happened during the concert. For sharing the awesomeness that is Teen Top, thank you soooo much!

I could've taken photos and videos since I was there but I didn't. Because: 1. I don't have a great camera for high res pictures and videos 2. I wouldn't risk being caught and interrupted from watching the concert 3. I won't be able to enjoy the concert fully if I was taking photos or videos

I'm calling out to all international fans, please honor all these fansites and respect their properties. They've invested time, money on their equipment and the concerts and events, patience, to name a few. So please please credit them always and never NEVER remove or alter their watermarks. Do not pass their work as your own. That's stealing.

Let us all respect one another and love Teen Top Forever. :D

[snake-house]

Rock Star!Aomine X Groupie!Reader - pop princess.

warnings: -language and slight sexual themes her/she pronouns used for reader when you see '--' it means times has passed in some sense _____ The roaring blaze of the crowd no longer pumped you up. It was the same old thing, concert after concert, and you were getting tired. You were no longer that seductive nineteen-year old that had Daiki Aomine wrapped around your finger. Now you were just the girl that he went to when another fan or celebrity didn't want to climb into his bed, he'd slink into yours for meaningless sex. Four years full of fame for Aomine later, you were the stereotypical groupie. 

You didn't have to buy tickets to the rock star's concerts anymore, you just had to show up and you'd be escorted to the VIP lounge, but it wasn't fun anymore. There was no thrill. That first concert of his you went to, with a front row ticket and a backstage pass, it felt like a fantasy. And when you locked eyes when Daiki was on stage singing your favorite song of his, lighting struck through you. You got your autograph from him back stage, and snapped a few pictures with him, and then he leaned over and asked you to stay for the after party. -- "You know," You mused, your hand lingering on his arm, "You're taller in person." Aomine laughed through his nose, "Most girls tell me I'm more attractive in person." "But why would I tell you something I already know?" You asked coyly, quirking an eyebrow up. Daiki's eyes lit up at your explanation, "Well," He lightly pulled you towards him, his head dipped down to your ear, "Can't you stay so I can teach you something you don't know?" -- That night, that was the night that sealed your fate. It wasn't the sex that sealed this fate, it was how he spoke to you afterwards. The pillow talk he gave you was the pillow talk you would give a lover, not a one night stand. Then he asked you to come again. After the next concert, and the next, and even the one after that, everyday felt like the first. Your parents didn't care how you sent your time, since your father was a successful businessman, he didn't even care how you spent his money, just as long as you didn't give him a bad reputation. Even though everything was amazing, and you were living the life you only dreamed to have, it started going south when you fell in love with someone who could never love you back. Everything started falling apart when you accidentally told him you loved him after a concert. All the laughing together and late night runs to fast food joints meant more to you than it did to him. He started looking to other girls when it came to sex, only once in a while sneaking into your bed. Your [color] eyes were left dull and lifeless. You no longer cared. Though you loved him, it didn't show through like it used to. You still let him use you like the sex toy groupie you were, you couldn't find it in you to push him away. Sex was the only time you could see him let go around you since the incident. "Thank you everybody! My fans are the reason I keep pushing everyday! Good Night!" You could hear Aomine coming off stage from yet another sold-out show in California. And another wave of screaming. You clapped just like the rest of the stage crew, but you stayed sitting on the couch provided. Tonight was the night. You were going to say goodbye. As you sat there, scrolling through some social media on your phone, you heard the constant stream of praises towards the blue-haired male over tonight's show. Slowly through the process of fans leaving, so did parts of the stage crew to pick up the stage, leaving you Aomine and a few of his friends and manager alone. You didn't have to look his way to know he was approaching you, you stood just as he got to you. He had the hazy look, the look of pent up frustrations and want. He was going to ask for sex. "Hey [Name], what do you say about getting out of here for a few hours?" You could feel his arms circle you and his lips meeting your neck. Weakly, you pushed him away, which confused him. Your eyes were sad, you were sad, but you had to get out of here, "How about we don't?" "What do you mean?" He asked, that look you used to love seeing was gone, it being replaced with irritation. You never told him no. "I mean I'm done." You picked up your purse, stuffing you phone into it in the process, "I'm done with whatever this is. I've changed. I'm no longer that helpless nineteen year old that clung to you as my life support. I'm twenty-three, and ready to be on my own." You looked up at him, his intense dark blue eyes met your sad [color] ones, "I'll always love, whether you ever come to feel the same way, it's ok. I'm ok with it now." Daiki was too shocked to respond as you pulled him down to give him one last kiss on his cheek. "What the fuck? No, you can't leave," He broke out of his frozen state, his voice raising as he saw you heading for the door, "You're no allowed to leave [Name]." You could tell there was an underlying threat. You no longer cared. "I can and I will." You kept your back towards him, "Why should I put myself through this any longer? I love you. I'm tired of living through the pain of you not loving me the same way." The few people in the room were now listening in to your conversation, "I'm sure you can find another sex doll to replace me if you ever get horny and no other fan wants to fuck you." Finally you turned to him, tears already flowing, "Goodbye Daiki." And you left. You left Aomine there as if you slapped him in the face. The door swung shut, and there was a wash of murmurs filling the room. "I was wondering when she would leave." "It went better than I thought." "Good for her, I don't think I could have lasted as long as she did." "Wow, I kind of feel bad for-" "Jesus Christ, just shut the fuck up," Aomine growled, jolting everyone, "I'm leaving, call the car around." -- A few weeks after you arrived back at home, you started to feel normal again. Through those weeks, your parents didn't pressure you into getting a job, since they could easily provide for you, but also because of your state. They didn't know what happened, but even if they did, there wouldn't be anyway they could comfort you. You started working out again, reading again, you went shopping with your friends, you went out with them, you seemed relatively normal. But everyone could see the scar that was healing since returning home. On one of your better days, you would just write. Write and write whatever was on your mind. Sometimes it was a dream you had, others is was a goal you wanted to meet, and some were memories. You wrote your favorite memories. Like when you were six and your father blew off a major investor to help you learn how to ride a bike. You scrapped your knee really bad that day. Another was when you went prom dress shopping with your mom and you both tried on the ugliest dresses the store had and laughed and laughed forever. And you wrote about when you first realized you were in love with Aomine. It was when one of his outdoor concerts was cancelled because of a bad thunderstorm rolling in. You and Aomine took advantage of the newly free night to relax. You ordered take out while Daiki started to make a blanket fort in the middle of the hotel room. When the take out arrived, he surprised you by calling room service and getting [favorite dessert]. There was no sex that night. You two just watched movies until three am. It was something really simple, but it was because it was one of the first times he treated you more like a friend, than a sex buddy. You don't think you've ever had that much fun ever. -- For the rock star, these weeks went differently. At first, he acted as though you really meant nothing to him and continued with his North America tour. From city to shinning sea, he sung his heart out without caring what you were doing or how you felt. He was crueler during this time. Treating his friends like trash and his manager worse. It was 'do this' 'get me that' and 'go fuck yourself' for the longest time. Aomine didn't care that you left, or at least he thought he didn't. Only when he had a blonde sitting his lap in a heated make-out session did he realize he was wrong. When she saw his rock star status, he pictured you. When she was calling out his name, he slipped out your name. He drunk himself to sleep for days after that blonde chick slapped him after call your name and stormed out. He even had to refund a sold out concert in Ohio because he was so hungover he couldn't do the show. "Why are you doing this to yourself?" Aomine looked up at his manager, who was also an old friend from his basket ball days, "I don't know what you're talking about Tetsu." He gave the shorter male a bored look from where he was sprawled out on his hotel bed. "I'm talking about how you're more willing to give yourself alcohol poisoning than admit to yourself that you're in love with [Name]." Kuroko sighed, leaning back against the desk that was provided, "You're honestly so blind." Daiki's eyes narrowed at his accusation. "I don't love her." He started, "She was really good in sex, that's it." "Sure it is. You must not remember about two years ago when you couldn't stop talking about her laugh, how you thought it was the most beautiful thing you've ever heard. Even more than your own music." Kuroko added, knowing he hit a nerve when Aomine flinched, "I may be quiet, but I still listen." "That was before. I'm a famous rock star, and she may be rich, but she's a nobody." He looked up at the ceiling, "It doesn't matter anymore. I don't love her, she doesn't love me, she left." "You're an idiot." "Hey!" "She left because of you. You really never saw her or understood how she felt. She was in pain." Kuroko walked over to block Aomine's vision of the ceiling with himself, "She was so in love with you, she left because you didn't feel the same. She was willing to try and forget her feelings and get out of the toxic environment you created." "What envi-" "You took more than a handful of other girls into your bed right in front of her. She said she loved her and you treated her like trash." Tetsuya said cutting him off. "So? She probably did the same." Daiki sat up on the edge of the bed, Kuroko backing up to give him his space, laughing through his nose, "What's so funny?" "You're just as blind as I say," He leaned back against the desk, "[Name] and I were good friends, and she's told me many things you don't know." Before Aomine could ask for examples, Kuroko beat him to it, "Since all you ever think about is sex, you were [Name]'s first time, and she never had sex with anyone else on tour." That information was like a punch to his gut. Aomine just assumed since you were so willing to have sex with him, that you've been to bed with as many people as he has. He thought you were a whore, and ended up treating you like one. "And," Kuroko started to add, "She lied to her family and helped me get rid of those rumors about her being your secret slut in the tabloids." By this, Daiki felt like the dick he was acting like. He was almost crying, realizing how wrong he's treated you. "What have I done?" He whispered to himself, burying his head in his hands, "I have to get her back, I have to apologize to her." He said, standing up suddenly. Tetsuya didn't even flinch, "Knowing [Name], you're going to have to more than just say sorry." He patted Aomine's shoulder before heading to the door, "Think it out, don't just get her back. Win her back. Good night Aomine." "... Good night." Though he would never admit it, Kuroko was right. -- You stuck another [preferred candy] in your mouth as you finished painting your nails. Tomorrow you invited a few friends over to go swimming, so you had to paint your nails to match your new swimsuit. It was almost midnight, but you didn't have any obligations tomorrow, but your friends. There was a rhythmic tapping on your window, startling your heart. 'What the...' You thought as you slowly made your way to your window. You slowly moved your curtains out of the way and screamed when you pulled your blinds up and saw a person standing there. But after your initial freak out, you weren't actually as scared as you thought, because it was Aomine. With a dirty look you opened your window, "Literally what the fuck Daiki." And you heard music. This fool had a boom box from before 2008 playing Pop Princess by The Click Five. You had a pang of that familiar pain shoot through you, but you kept an annoyed look on your face. 'Pop princess hold my hand Pop princess I'm a fan Pop princess I need you now Freak me out turn me inside out' "What do you want Daiki?" You asked with a sigh. And he sung along to the next lines. 'Pop princess make me smile Pop princess drive me wild Pop princess I need you now So baby turn your love up loud' "Why are you here?" You asked again, wanting an explanation, "How did you get over the fence without the alarm going off?" The tan male turned down the volume on the boom box, so the song was now only background music, "I may be a famous rock star, but I was a sneaky teenager once," You broke a small smile at that, but quickly returned your glare, "I'm here for you [Name], I'm here to win you back?" "Why?" You had anger in your words, but you didn't care. "Because I treated you wrong. I was a huge dick, and I didn't realize what I was doing to you, how I was torturing." He was chocking himself up, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. If I only realized my own feelings sooner, I wouldn't have lost you, and I wouldn't have put you through that hell." "Damn right." You muttered, but not giving up to him that easily. "You once said that this song truly explained how you felt about me. I was your prince. But you're my pop princess." "What are you even getting at?" Your heart rate was picking up, and you didn't want to lose to him, you weren't going to let yourself get hurt again. "I'm your biggest fan, I always have been. You're the only one that I can let loose with and make me smile. You drive me wild, and you, you're the most amazing person I've ever met." You could see that he was really swallowing his pride to be truthful with you and himself about what he was saying. "I love you, I love you so much. I should have told you sooner, and I won't make up any excuses for how I treated, only how I wished I was truthful with myself sooner. If you find it in your heart to forgive me, to love me again, I'm settling down back in Japan to start my work on a new album, I leave three days, and I would love to have you by my side, to be my muse again." "What do you mean again?" "I didn't realize it until Kuroko told me, all those stupid love songs were for you, they were all for you." You were contradicting yourself. You were falling for him again, but, did you really ever stop? You may regret it later, but you were going to take this chance. You had to. With a pregnant pause, you turned away from the window and drug something from under your bed, "Well, I guess if we're going to Japan in three days, I better get packing." You said with a smile and placed your [color] suitcase on your bed. The joy and love that lit up in Aomine's eyes was something you've never seen before. You could cry. The six foot plus rock star pulled him self through the window, letting the boom box fall into the grass and break. He picked you up and twirled your around, smothering you in kisses. "I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you," He repeated between each kiss, "I know I'm not fully forgiven, but I will do everything in my power to make it up to you [Name]." He said as he set you back down on the ground, but still keeping his hands around your waist. You smiled as bright as he was, "Thank you, but really," You laid your head against his chest and listened to his heart, "Just be honest with me from now on and never leave my side." "Of course," Daiki said in a fake offended tone, "Where else would I be? But, will you stay by mine in return?" "Yes, because I love you too."

[mirkwoodshewolf]

Rock Angel takes Japan; Queen x reader

*Author’s note*

Hello my fellow readers of my “Rock Angel” series I have yet another chapter for you and this time this comes from an actual event the boys of Queen got to experience in Japan 1975 so click the linked video to see and you’ll get an idea, especially during the tea ceremony. Anyways I am so happy more people are taking an interest in this series and loving it and as always tag list is always open. I’ve already done multiple parts already but they are more for the future so once I do include an introduction to another character, then I may or may not post the chaps. I’ve got done already in the past 2 days. Alright just one swear word but overall FLUFF enjoy my darlings :)

Taglist *open*:

@phantom-fangirl-stuff

@mr-badguymercury

@onebigfangirlworld

@labessieisallama

@starswin

@naturalswifty89

@isabella-bby

_______________________________________________________

*April 2nd, 1982*

        I had been invited over to Freddie’s place along with the other boys just to do a little catching up.  Ever since my big break out, I had recorded my single “Set it all free” plus my very first album which took about three months to finish up, had it not been for the boys coming over to help me I might’ve burned myself out and probably want to crawl in under a rock and die.

        My single had been recorded while the guys were still on tour and was released last October when I was still recording my first album.  I still have yet to hear the results of my single and I was getting worried that if no one world wide liked it, would they even like my first album.

        “Darling your as jumpy as a cricket, what’s gotten you so frightened darling?”

        “Guys, how long was it to hear the results of your first single?”

“Oh it was awhile love, the longest we had to wait was maybe 8-9 months.” Answered Brian.

“You worried about yours?” asked Deacy. I looked down shamefully and told them.

“I mean sure America loved the song, but what about the rest of the world? I mean….sure there are female singers out there now but—what if they don’t like me because it’s just me and not an entire band I’m performing with?”

        “Then fuck them.” Proclaimed Freddie.

        “I agree with Fred, you’re incredibly talented love, and we’re not just saying that because we’re your friends. We’re speaking as four musicians to another rising one. You sing what the world needs to hear but refuses to acknowledge it. Even if the world doesn’t love your music, we will always love it, as well as you.” Roger said as he came up behind me and wrapped an arm around me.

I smiled softly and placed my hands on his arm as I felt him kiss my temple and I thanked him.  Freddie’s phone soon rang and he picked it up and said.

“Freddie Mercury darling, oh Miami what a pleasant surprise, couldn’t resist hearing my voice could you?” We all rolled our eyes at Fred and soon he continued, “Yeah she’s right here, okay I’ll put her on,” he held the phone out to me and he said, “He wants to talk to you darling,” suddenly my heart began to speed up as I got out of Roger’s one armed hug and took the phone.

“Hey, Jim what’s up?” I held the phone close to my ear as I paced around and said, “Uh-huh, yeah….okay. Yeah, uh-huh okay thanks. Yeah you too, bye.” I then hung up the phone and I collapsed onto Fred’s couch right where Delilah was sitting.

“What’d he say love?” asked Deacy.

“Was it your single? Did you sell out?” demanded Freddie.  I remained silent trying to take what Miami had told me all in.

“(Y/n)? Love are you okay? Is it bad news?” asked Roger in pure concern as he looked at me with worried eyes.  I finally then decided to tell them by first asking a question.

“Tell me what it was like when you guys went to Japan back in ’75?”

“Ohh I still get tears remembering our welcome there. We just had no idea what to expect and the sheer amount of people that came to welcome us was just overwhelming.” Brian said.

“Why do you ask?” asked Deacy.

“Well you guys got some competition because my single just sold out in Japan. They want me to perform live in Tokyo, Japan!” The boys all cheered as Freddie picked me up spinning me around leaving me in a laughing fit as I embraced him as tightly as I could.

I was soon engulfed in a Queen group hug as they all cheered for me.  Once I was free Brian said.

“That’s incredible love, when do you leave?”

“Oh shit I gotta go home and pack! Jim’s hoping to get the first nonstop flight to Japan tonight. Sorry gotta cut this visit short you guys, I’ll call you as soon as I reach Japan bye!” I quickly raced out of Freddie’s house and got on my bike and revved it up before taking off back to my flat.

Once I got home, I began packing up for the week tour of Japan.  Packing all my clothes, hats, heath and beauty stuff, shoes and minor accessories like a couple of rings, my fingerless gloves, bracelets and necklaces.  When I was sure I had everything I heard a limo honk and I knew my ride was here.

Grabbing my suitcases and a couple of my guitars, I opened my door and soon my stage handler Hank came up and helped me pack up the stuff into the limo.  José my driver opened up the door and I thanked him as I stepped inside to see Miami sitting inside the back.

“Hello (y/n), so you got everything?”

“I’m pretty sure. Oh my god I can’t believe this is really happening. I mean the last time I went to Japan I was still your intern, now I’m one of your many clients.”

“It’s unbelievable how much has changed. And I couldn’t be more proud of you, I knew I chose right when I picked you. I knew you’d become more than just an intern to me one day.” I smiled at him and then Jim told José to get us to the airport.

We reached the airport and for the first time ever, I would get to experience a private airline where I am the star and not just part of the crew.  The limo stopped right by the plane that I would be taking all the way to Japan.

“Alright now just head on straight into the plane, I’ll take care of everything with the rest of the crew. You just find a seat okay love?” I nodded then our doors opened up and I went out first and raced towards the plane and quickly raced up the stairs until I reached the plane.

“Good afternoon Miss, I’m Captain Trevor and I will be your pilot for the nonstop flight to Japan. You will be in safe hands with us Ms. (l/n).”

“Thank you Captain Trevor.” I saluted to him before walking further in the plane and see the luxurious interior of the plane. I picked me a spot and one of the flight attendants came up to me and said.

“Can I offer you any refreshments Ms. (l/n)?”

“I’ll just take a water for now,” she nodded then went to the back room to get my drink.  Jim soon came in with a few more assistants who were going to help me get through the airport.

“You ready love?” asked Jim.  I nodded as I fastened my seatbelt and soon the flight attendants went over the basic checklists for safety procedures and within about 5-10 minutes we were taking off.

I was currently reading my old English-Japanese dictionary that I had to have for a class for my foreign language credit I still had to take and practiced some basic greets that I was going to say.  Hours ticked by and soon it was getting pretty late and there was still about 6hrs left of the 11hr flight so I decided to sleep the rest of the trip.

As I got myself situated, I pulled out my locket that I always kept around my neck and opened it up to reveal the picture of me with the boys at the Madison Square Garden show.  This picture was taken right after the concert after my first outbreak performance.

“I already miss you guys, I sure wish you could be here.” I closed the locket up and tucked it back under my shirt and covered myself up with my favorite blanket and soon fell fast asleep.

After six hours at 4am in the morning, we arrived at Japan.  Jim woke me up and I got myself woken up so that way I wouldn’t risk any embarrassing photos of me getting out.  I re-did my makeup and eat me some M&M’s to get myself woken up since they always did the trick for me.

Our plane landed right at Tokyo International airport right in the private plane landing parking lot.  I grabbed my bags and we all left the plane and headed on inside the airport.

We met up with the representatives of Japan as well as my translator.

“Ms. (l/n) I am Yamamoto Kaizo your translator, it is a pleasure to meet you. My daughters are big fans of yours.”

“Arigato Yamamoto, I’m honored. And I can’t wait to see all of Japan, my friends of Queen spoke so highly of this country so many times.”

“Come on (y/n) the car’s waiting to get us to the hotel to drop off your things, then we need to get you ready for the press conference.” Jim said.  I nodded then we all raced down the hallways out of the gates.

And as soon as I could be seen coming out of the gates all I heard were loud screams.  Over my security I saw hundreds of pictures from some of my photoshoots that I’ve been involved in, signs with my name saying “Welcome” or the word “Rock” with two angel wings sprouting out either side of the word.

Oh my god Brian was right, I felt like I was about ready to cry.  No other place in the world has ever greeted me like this, I mean it’s almost as if I were suddenly royalty to them now.  I waved to them and I wished that I could stop and sign autographs for them but I was on a tight schedule and they wouldn’t allow me as I was rushed out of the airport and into the car.

Crowds of Japanese fangirls and boys were trying to get through hoping to even catch a glimpse of me, press were snapping pictures like crazy and security was trying to keep them back as I finally got in the limo and was in the safe zone and the driver took off.

I waved to them and I saw some of the fans trying to chase after the car and I leaned back sighing deeply as I said.

“Wow that was….insane.”

“Life of a Rockstar love, I’m sure the boys have told you a lot about Japan” said Miami.

“That they have, okay now this press conference. What exactly do I have to do for it?”

“Alright, well first they’ll talk about a bit about your history and then we’ll open it up for a brief Q&A. Then they will present to you a platinum of your single just like they did with the boys when they sold out here back in 75, then they’ve invited you for a traditional Japanese tea ceremony where you will give Japan a thank you message and to help promote more people for coming to the concert which will happen tonight at the center of the capital right near the Tokyo tower.” I nodded and soon we arrived at the hotel where we quickly got checked in and I did a quick shower.

Once I was done and blow dried my hair up and straightened it out.  When I was presentable and cleaned up I redid my makeup and quickly raced out of my room and met Jim downstairs in the lobby and we left for the press conference together.

We arrived at the building at around 8:15am and the conference was to start at 9.  I was staying in the back room where I finally got the chance to meet my Japanese fans. Some of the girls were dressed up like me with the same leather jacket, long flapped jeans and having highlights in their hair.

I happily signed all their stuff and I was given so many presents like bouquets upon bouquets of roses red or white, Japanese yo-yos, a spinning top, painting of me as an angel holding a guitar shooting out bolts of lighting, just so many sweet gifts and I thanked them all in Japanese which all the girls were amazed and clapped for me smiling.

Finally at 9am sharp, the press conference began. I left the backroom and was guided towards the front and as soon as the doors opened and I walked onto the platform stage where a large table was set up for me, I was bombarded by flashes from cameras.  As I took my seat the press conference began.

As the conference went on just like Miami said, I told them about my process of making the single, what the song meant to me (without giving too much detail, even though I could publicly humiliate Adam at this rate but I didn’t want to.) and then what was next for me.

I was then given by one of the top record producers of Japan a large framed platinum cover of my single “Set it all free” to which we shook hands and we posed for pictures with it.  At around 11:30am the conference was over and I was then taken out to a park near the Tokyo tower where I would be taking part of the tea ceremony, just like the boys were.

We finally arrived at about 12:20pm and I was one hungry girl, but I still wanted to be respectful.  Women in traditional Japanese kimonos surrounded the blanket along with photographers and camera crew people.

I took off my shoes and I sat down on the blanket and one of the girls came over to me and set down my tea as another one was instructing me the proper way to drink their tea.

It was a nice spring day, the cheery blossoms were in full bloom, the wind was blowing at a nice, gentle breeze and I was given some cakes and tea.  All the while the photographers were getting pictures for their magazine and the camera crew were filming me.  I was talking to the girls asking them questions about Japan and what other traditions they partake in.

They were friendly and told me all the tea ceremonies they helped out in for the summer festivals, the cherry blossom festival, and they themselves told me this but these girls also gave my boys the exact tea ceremony they were giving me right now.

After the ceremony I was playing with some of my presents and taking pictures of the beautiful park for my own keeping so that one day I could look back on this and remember exactly what Japan had done for me. Finally it was time for my thank you message before I got ready for the concert tonight.

I stood where the camera people wanted me to stand and they emphasized to me repeatedly to not turn around, just look right at the camera and not look at anything else.  At first I was a little scared at the fact the man kept emphasizing it and looking me dead in the eye as he said it, so I did what he asked.

Once the camera started filming I gave my message to the people of Japan.

“Kon'nichiwa Nihon, watashi wa (l/n) (y/n). Hopefully I said that right hahaha. Anyways I just want to thank all of you for such a warm welcome to Japan. You all have been so kind and I can’t repay for making me feel so comfortable. Thanks for all the presents,” I said as I held up my yoyo, “And umm—”

Little did I know as I began my message, someone with shaggy blonde hair was photobombing me in the background going across the shot with his arms raised in the air.

“I hope you all come out to see the concert later tonight or any show that I’ll do in the near future. Heck I may just even move here.” As I continued, two men one with wild curly hair like a poodle and another with shorter poofy hair both came up behind me and crouched down so that they wouldn’t be seen in the shot.

The poodle haired fellow raised his arms up like wings while the other one kept his arms low, so the shot would look like I had two different wings in the back. Before peeking out on either side of me and making funny faces or sticking out their tongues.

For some reason I kept feeling someone was behind me so I quickly turned around and let out a squeak and laughed as did the rest of the crew.  I fell to my knees laughing and crying at the same time.  John picked me up and held me in his arms swaying me back and forth as Freddie came into the shot and he said.

“Come see this lovely angel perform tonight. She is a saint and a true angel. Let her grace you with her wonderful voice darlings. She has the Queen seal of approval.”  With that the camera shut off.  I turned and hugged Deacy as tightly as I could before I separated and I said.

“What are you guys doing here?”

“Did you really think we’d miss you making it as big as we did here in Japan?” asked Brian.

“Plus Miami called us and thought we’d give you a good surprise so—surprise!” Freddie said as he did the jazz hands at the end of his statement.

“Oh my God!” I cried out. “You lot better not have made me look stupid in that video.”

“Oh you wound us darling, why would we ever do that to you deliberately?” Roger said as he came up and wrapped his arms around me swaying me just like Deacy did earlier before playfully giving me a noogie and bopping my nose.  I shook my head at him as he hugged me closer to him before releasing me.

After the tea ceremony it was time to head to the concert arena and do soundchecks and get ready for my concert at 6pm. After going over and making sure everything checked out, I was now in my makeup room getting all pretty for my show when I heard the door knock.

“Who is it?”

“(Y/n) (l/n) Rock angel fan club, party of 4.” I heard Freddie’s voice say.  I smiled and said.

“Come right on in.” The boys entered inside my huge dressing room and Freddie made himself comfortable right on the couch.

“You nervous darling?” he asked me.

“A bit.” I admitted.

“Well don’t be, you’ll do great, you always bring the rock in Rock n roll, especially to the younger fans since you know how to connect with them.” I smiled at him and then I turned to see Brian holding up a long wrapped up present.

“What’s that Bri?”

“Just a little something for you.” He handed it over to me and I set it down on the table in front of the couch and I asked him.

“Can I open it now or do I have to wait till after the concert?”

“I’d really love to see you open it now.” He said. I knelt down and began to rip up the paper slowly.

“Come on love are we saving the wrapping paper just rip it off!” Roger teased which made me laugh as I took a big chunk of the wrapping paper and threw it at him which made the boys laugh.  After ripping the last of it off, there in front of me was a black case.  I looked up at Brian before unbuckling it and slowly opening it up and I let out a gasp.

Inside was a red special guitar.  At first I almost thought it was his own red special since it was the exact same pattern of red and black design but I noticed that at the red portion tattooed in black into the guitar itself was the word ROCK with angel wings on either side.

“Ohh….”

“It took a while to make it with the time I had, I…..was almost afraid I wouldn’t have it ready in time. Give it a go,” I delicately took the red special out of the case and adjusted the strap to my size and held onto it before giving it a gentle strum.

After giving it a couple of tunes and strumming it until finally it gave out a beautiful hum.

“Oh Brian this…..this is the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for me.” I set my red special back in the case and sat up and hugged him tightly, burying my face into his chest.  “Thank you so much.”

“I’m glad you like it love, it would be an honor if you were to play with that red special tonight for Japan.”

“Of course, I’ll play it at every performance I’ll ever do. Ohh I love you guys I’m so glad you all came.” The boys soon wrapped me in a group hug as I happily wept and as we separated I whimpered out, “Fuck now my makeups ruined.” The boys laughed so Deacy guided me back to my chair, Brian took the wipes and wiped away any strays of makeup and both Roger and Freddie reapplied my makeup making me all pretty again.

A knock was soon heard and one of the stage crew members told me that it was showtime.  I grabbed my newly gifted red special and I put it around my shoulder and the boys and I walked out onto the stage.  I stood backstage getting myself pumped up as the boys gave me final words of good luck until finally a Japanese announcer came over the speaker and I heard my stage name being called and I came onto the stage hearing thousands of people scream my name.

And with that the concert began.

I sang “Set it all free” and seeing all the Japanese girls bouncing up and down singing along to the song even though they probably didn’t know English, it made me feel so happy inside.  And by permission as long as I didn’t give too much away, I was allowed to do one song from my new upcoming album so I sang a song that I titled “So good.”

Which felt like the perfect song since it was all about shining through in the spotlight even after having the dream of reaching for your dreams, but you had to have the courage and strength to achieve them.

I also went ahead and sang a couple of my favorite Queen songs just to show my boys my love for them.  I sang my all-time favorite “Somebody to love”, my next cover song was “Don’t stop me now” and finally to end the show I did “You’re my best friend” and I even told the audience that I dedicated this cover to my boys of Queen.

After the end of the concert everyone cheered loudly holding up signs of my name or of my stage name.

“Arigato Nihon! You’ve been a great crowd!” I said into the microphone as I took my final bow and ran off stage.  I met up with the guys who each one by one embraced me and gave me a kiss of congratulations on either my cheek, temple, forehead or the top of my head.

The boys and I stayed in Japan for the rest of the week exploring all of Japan.  The boys taking me to their favorite places or restaurants they ate in years ago.  And I did a show in Tokyo, Kyoto and Osaka.  To show my love for the boys, I had them come up on a couple of songs and I performed alongside them and let me tell you sharing the stage with them, that’s what truly made me alive.

And singing alongside Fred on some of their songs, it’s a blast and an honor when Freddie Mercury allows you to take the stage and sing a verse of a Queen song.

At the end of the short Japan tour it was time to go home.  The boys and I waved goodbye to Japan and took final pictures together of us both getting on and in the plane.  

Of course Fred high-jacked the camera and wouldn’t stop taking pictures of me all the while acting like a photographer telling me to show him the stuff and to work it like I owned this plane.

As we were now in the air, Deacy and Bri were already out like lightbulbs while Fred was reading through a magazine and I was sitting next to Roger now.

“Does it only go up from here?” I asked myself.

“So long as you keep giving the fans what they want, you’re already the talk of the world love, just make sure you don’t get a big head like Fred over there.” He whispered the last part which made me giggle softly.

“I promise Rog, I’ll stay humble and not act like a hysterical queen.”

“Good, cause god knows we don’t need another one.”

“Oh so you’re not talking about yourself?” I teased. He glared at me before flicking my forehead making me whimper out “ow! I was joking.” I rubbed the spot where he had flicked me and he smirked at me.

“Serves you right.” I rolled my eyes at him before letting out a soft yawn.  “You’ve had a long week love, you should get some sleep.”

“Yeah you’re right.” I then got myself comfortable by leaning up against his chest and he immediately brought my blanket back over my shoulders and wrapped his arms around me.  One hand stroking my head while the other wrapped around my shoulders gently stroking my arms with his thumb.

I could hear him softly humming “Somebody to love” all the while he’d kiss the top of my head every now and then until finally I fell asleep to Roger’s humming, the sound of his heartbeat and the gentle strokes and massages he was giving to my head.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #146

“peace sells, but who’s buying?”

Have you ever been arrested? For what?  No. Do you like Pres. Obama? Why?  Don't even fight me, dude was funny.  From a political position, I can't answer.  I didn't pay enough attention to form a well-supported opinion. Do you know how to change the oil in your car?  Nope. At what age did you obtain your driver license?  I don't have it yet, but I do expect to probably get it this year. Do you like Slim Jim’s?  g i m m e What are you favorite kind of chips?  Spicy Cheetos. Are there any plants in your house?  I think there's none... How important is it for you and your partner or friends to share a similar taste in music, movies, shows, etc?  Not very important at all. What sort of compliments make you feel the best?  Because I'm a self-conscious piece of shit, calling me pretty or something of the sort and actually sounding sincere can brighten my whole day.  Also just a compliment on my behavior means a lot. If you have a pet, do they sleep with you at night?  Roman does. <3  He sleeps on my hip, arm, or curled beside me. What is the climate and geography like where you live?  Usually warm, humid as fuck in the summer...  We live in a pretty flat area.  Farming terrain. Do you have a Facebook? If no, then why not?  Yeah. Has there ever been a murder in your town?  Yeah. Are you someone who has to analyze everything?  AAHAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Are you too sensitive for your own good? YUP. Do you still have pictures of you and your ex best friend?  I'm sure in old photo albums Mom keeps. Where does your grandma live?  My only living one technically lives in Florida, but she stays in NY with her son's family a lot.  Probably doesn't much now that she's married, though. Is there a mirror in your room?  We have one we need to put up on my door. Have you ever done hard drugs before?  No. Have you ever lived with a roommate before? Jacob and Amanda when I was in the apartment with Jason. What's the littlest you have slept in?  Naked accidentally lmao. What is your favorite juice? Mixed ones.  Particularly mango ones. Do you love one parent better than the other?  Yeah, admittedly.  But I adore them both. What’s the best club you’ve ever been to? Never been. Do you prefer hardly toasted at all or burnt toast?  You will never see me eat burnt toast. Are there any forms of Art you personally find pointless?  I will never in my entire life understand why scribbles a two-year-old could make sometimes sell for thousands.  But for the artist themselves, if it's therapeutic, then, *shrugs* Have you ever been told you naturally tilt your head a certain way?  YUP and my mom would always try to fix it.  I still do it. Who were the last two girls you texted?  Sara and Mom. When was the last time you completely broke down?  Uhhhh I'm unsure. Have you ever gone to court?  Yeah, but only to explain to a judge why I felt I should be released from the mental hospital sooner.  Won.  They wanted to keep me for a whole month and I was like um fuck no, especially when your facility sucks. When was the last time you felt left out?  *shrugs* Do you know if women in your family tend to get gray hair early? Have you yourself ever had a gray hair?  Idk, and no. Who in your family has the longest hair? How long is yours? Nicole easily has the longest.  The longer side of my hair just barely passes my ear. What professional teams do you and/or your family root for? Dad's for the Carolina Hurricanes and Cleveland Browns. How many people have you truly fallen IN love with? Two. What’s your favorite bird?  Barn owls. Does your car have an alarm?  I don't have my own car.  Mom's doesn't. What about your house?  No, but Teddy and Bentley suffice well. Have you ever seen your siblings naked?  As kids, sure, and then Nicole has like zero shame walking around the house naked after a shower to get clothes. Did you ever really believe in the tooth fairy?  Lol yeah. Would you ever get your legs waxed? No, sounds painful as fuck.  Especially when your hair's as thick as mine. @_@ Do you like the picture on your license/I.D. card? HELL NO.  It looks n o t h i n g like me. Have you ever had surgery or stitches? Both. Are you unemployed?  Yeah. Do you think the govt has a cure for cancer, but is hiding it from public? Tbh maybe.  Like, have you not heard the billion ideas that could cure cancer, but these ideas are never pursued?  And even those that have been, I would not at all be surprised if one way or even multiple have been found but kept silent because the world runs on money.  Might as well let people stay sick and milk millions out of them, right?  I don't trust the government for shit. Do you have a Mexican friend?  Yeah. Are both of your parents still alive?  Thankfully. Was your ex born in America?  All but one, although I really don't even consider us as ever dating. What popular social media platforms AREN’T you on?  I don't have a personal Instagram, no Snapchat, and I literally only have a blank Twitter to like Mark's shit get on my level. What was the last thing you were stressed about? Uhhh how am I blanking on this. Would you rather have a trampoline or swimming pool?  Pool.  I could never handle a trampoline again with my knees, plus it just doesn't entertain me as it did as a kid. Do you have the same favorite colors you had when you were a kid?  Yeah.  My favorite color has always been hues of red. What do you like to put in your tea? I hate tea. Who have you been told you look like? My sisters, at least somewhat.  And Mom and Dad. What color are your doorknobs?  Gold. Do you own a bobblehead?  No. What do you make wishes on?  Nothing. What is your city known for? "You mean Tennessee?" What is your state known for? Mountain Dew, Pepsi, Bojangle's, probably half of all country bands... What’s your favorite Paramore song?  "That's What You Get." What was the subject of your last photo shoot? I couldn't tell you the last time I was in what I'd call a "photo shoot," not since I was a kid...  The most recent one I did was of Colleen and her son. What are some of your favorite sounds?  Wind chimes, waves, fire crackling, the breeze through leaves, sARA'S SINGING YOU GO AMY LEE... lots of things. When two family members are fighting, what do you usually do?  There's a chance I'll be dumb and butt in if I think I could defuse the situation, but I'll sometimes just awkwardly stay silent. What’s your all time FAVORITE freezer food? Do you eat that a lot?  I dunno, that's broad as hell... If you had to choose, would you rather be an alcoholic or pothead?  The latter. What are you listening to?  A Jeffree Star video oops I've fallen in love with him tbh. What if someone asked you to be in a relationship with them?  I'm already happily in one so the answer would be no. What will your next piercing be?  It's probs gonna be my collarbones. Your phone is ringing. It’s your ex. What do you say?  Well I know none of my ex's numbers but Girt's, but I'll just say I knew them.  Aaron, I'd be very confused considering we haven't talked since like freshman year, but greet him like I would any old friend.  Juan or Tyler, wouldn't answer.  Girt, answer like normal.  Jason, tbh I'd answer and do whatever I could to show how much better my life is without him.  Bitchy but idc.  After the shit he shoved me into, I want him to know I came out better than ever. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed?  Quite a few times but still not enough weeps. Will you kiss that person again?  YEAH. Do you like champagne?  Never tried it. Do you like cinnamon on your apple pie?  I hate pie. Do you clap or cheer when at a concert?  Only been to one, but yeah. Do you use a comb or brush?  Mostly a comb now that my hair's short. Do you eat the crust of your sandwiches?  It's the part I eat first. Have you ever had a vacation where you stayed in a cabin?  No, I wish. Would you rather call or text?  Omfg do not call me. What color would you dye your hair right now if you could, and it was guaranteed to look good?  Okay so currently I'm dying (hawhaw) to get this mostly peach color, but have it fade to fiery, reddish-orange on the longer side.  It's based on a picture and would cost over $100, so.  Guess who's not doing it anytime soon lmao. Do you like the way you look naked? PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF. Have you ever dissected an animal?  In high school. Do you believe that humankind has a future in space (will we live there some day)? Maybe.  Probably, actually. What (not who) do you care about?  Gay rights, animal rights (no, not to PETA degree), equal human rights in general, the first amendment, maintaining peace/pacifism, conservation efforts... I'unno, lots of stuff, if you want the answer to be like, big topics. Who or what is really the absolute root and source of all evil?  Discontent.  Now this itself doesn't always lead to evil actions, but just about any malevolence I can think up stems from that. Has anyone ever led you on? No. Would you rather date someone 4 feet tall or 9 feet tall? The former. What is the one thing you do that your friends wish you didn’t? I've heard "don't be afraid to reach out first" a billion times. Do you believe you have a soul?  Yes. Would you rather have a child that is more confident or more curious? Curious.  Ask questions, learn things. Who influences you to be the way you are?  LOTS of people! What is one idea that you live by?  Yikes, that's hard.  But I suppose one of the biggest is that caring about the world and what's within it does wonders. How can people act to make you want to get to know them? Be super open, honest, and shameless of yourself.  See the positives, SHOW you clearly care about others, have passion... and if you're funny, that's a bonus. When are you at a loss for words?  It's honestly rare I seriously am.  If I in person was to witness something like abused dogs screaming at being pet for the first time, that'd almost definitely get me. What is the worst time to be alone? When suicidal.  You.  Need.  To.  Talk. What do your parents do that you will try never to do?  I'll never smoke like Dad.  And I'm never having kids, but if I did, I would never, ever spank them like Mom did me and my sisters. Who is your favorite visual artist?  Some folks on deviantART.  The three probably in a tie are NukeRooster (I prefer lots of her older stuff, though; also got permission to tattoo one of her paintings one day yeets loudly), sandara, and Culpeo-Fox. What is the most magical thing that has ever happened to you?  I'm fucking pathetic that time Mark reblogged my gif lmao my soul evacuated my body and left me for dead for like three days & nothing felt real.  Whenever that gif comes up in my activity now, a single tear falls. Do you have high blood pressure? No, it's usually kinda low. Have you ever pumped gas?  No.  I'm 22.  Weeps. Do you have any appointments this month?  I have a therapy and psychiatry appointment monthly, so yes. Do you like bras that have removable straps? h u n n y I ain't in the Itty-Bitty Titty Committee so it makes no difference to me, me wearing bras without straps is a danger to society. What are you the most sensitive about? Can we like never comment on my weight.  Actually, scratch that, that's not the worst.  I would probably rip someone's eyes out and sob for a week if someone claimed I did Jason wrong.  I'd fucking lose it. Have you ever left a mean unsigned note? No, I don't think I've ever left a mean note. What are three things that you try not to think about?  Perhaps more than anything is the fact one day, I may become immune to the medications that played a big role in saving my life.  I try really, really hard to never think about that.  I do pretty well at that, thankfully...  Two others are hazards of me driving and the possibility of getting another job that only flops. Is casual sex acceptable for you? Abso-fucking-lutely not. What form of sexual protection do you use? Being in a gay relationship lmao.  Okay but seriously I take birth control, but for my period. Do you believe in the need for political correctness? It's gone way too goddamn far jfc. Does anyone have a video tape of you doing something embarrassing?  Mom probably lmao. What is the worst fault a person can have?  Abusive. Who have you read a biography about?  Ozzy Osbourne. What do you find yourself encouraging others to try?  BELIEVE IN YOUR CAPABILITIES!!! Are there any animals you flat out refuse to touch?  Maggots, slugs, some spiders and insects, centipedes... If it were legal would you own a human slave (race unimportant)?  Nope. Do/did you always say goodnight to your parents before bed?  No. Are there any holidays you don’t celebrate?  It'd be easier to tell you what we do celebrate.