#she never has and she never will its some gross fixation of hers

[saddlepunk]

fascinating message from my mother vis a vis the camera in the living room that i unplug any time she leaves. her reasoning is that shes been cheated on in the past, so shes paranoid and needs to keep track of who's coming into the house. my reasoning, i feel, is that reason makes 0 sense because i am her Son, and if i bring someone into the house thats not... even close to the same thing??? what the fuck kind of logic line is that??? i might be doing secret illicit relationship stuff with... my own boyfriend? in my house where i live? what kind of an example for needing the cameras is that????? shes not in a relationship anymore, my """"dad"""" moved out already. what is the fucking issue here.

[seeyoulbleed]

Fixation

For @the-slasher-files Bloodfest 2023 event!! Chose the prompt trap(s). Go check it out, it's open to everyone!!

Summary: You learn some unsettling things about what it means to be loved by a Uchiha, let alone Madara himself. gender-neutral reader. SFW.

"It's a bit hot, so be careful-" You jinx yourself, your long pant legs tripping you. Down you go, scalding water splashing your hand. Tender is the flesh that it spills off of, red and welling and all too vulnerable.

He's there within a moment, catching your hand gently in his, tugging you into his grasp before you can truly tumble to the floor. Madara lets the porcelain teapot he bought for your birthday shatter across the tatami mats, his focus only on you.

You hate it when he looks at you like this.

Fathomless black eyes pinning you in place, the butterfly to his all-knowing gaze, the glimmer of red you catch piercing you right through. Saying Madara Uchiha is an intimidating man is a gross understatement, one that fails to truly encompass everything that he is. There's something primordial to the very air around him, something old and heavy that presses in on you to keep you in place.

You think he knows what he does to you. Knows how he's the hawk to your rabbit, caught in his talons. He's trying so hard to be soft, to be tame, as he calls for a healer. All is silent as he sits you down far from the mess. You look everywhere but him, a flush crawling up your neck. Does he have to stare?

"I apologize. I do not wish you discomfort."

Your mouth goes dry and you duck your head. You hadn't realized you'd said it out loud. But you always do forget yourself when you're with him- it's what made this...whatever this is, all the more concerning. Despite the improperness of the whole thing, he's moved you into the Uchiha complex, right within his own chambers. He's never done anything untoward, has been even kind in his own way, but there is not a doubt in your mind he is biding his time.

For what? He already has you. What is he waiting for?

The healer comes rushing in, startling you out of your thoughts. It makes you jump, and that makes Madara turn that heavy gaze of his onto the woman. You peek from the corner of your eyes and watch in real-time as fear strikes her, her elderly face turning ashen as she begs his pardon. He grants her the reprieve in the form of focusing on your hand.

"Heal it."

The healer nods, her once Uchiha black hair now a withered grey that twists out of her face in a simple braid. Familiar black eyes don't bother to look at you, only at your wound, her crepe paper-thin skinned hands trembling, unwilling to touch you fully.

Madara hears something you cannot, red filling the black of his eyes. The tomoe spins lazily in ire.

"Stay here. I will return shortly." His hand hovers by your cheek, his fingertips brushing the curve of it light as a feather. It twitches, something deeper in his eyes that you refuse to acknowledge flickering to life. Like a candle, it's snuffed out before you can pretend it was never there.

He's gone within a blink and it is only you and the healer.

Her chakra is mint green where it coats your skin, the healing energy flowing through you and remaking your cells anew. How it truly worked escaped you as most ninja arts do but its soft color entrances you. So used to black and red, you had nearly forgotten such a gentle color.

"The way he loves you...I will never understand it," The healer admits in a whisper.

"He does not love me." You reply, tone empty. "Not the way you believe."

"It may not be a love you understand, but he loves you all the same. An Uchiha loves with every breath. Every pulse of his veins belongs to you. It may appear twisted, but it is the way we love."

"It's just some kind of fixation. You said it yourself you don't understand his love."

She licks her lips and takes a moment to think of her next words, the green chakra sputtering out as the last of your skin heals. "He has always been an intense man. A devoted man. I do not doubt he loves you, I doubt he knows how to control it. And that surprises me most of all given all that he is."

"Why are you telling me this?" You mutter, taking your hand back. You flex it, watching the new skin with trepidation building in your gut.

"I'm warning you. Do not think things will stay as they are. You sleep in his room but the clan elders whisper how he has yet to bed you. They whisper how he has yet to bring up wedding plans, and yet he has ordered bands from the Land of Iron. This moment of peace you are living in will not last and you will come to know what it truly means to be loved by a Uchiha, let alone one like my Lord."

You drop your hand. Blood has spilled from where you bit into your cheek, a sudden rage filling you.

"I never asked nor agreed to any of this."

She gives you a pitying look. "Nobody ever does. But love comes and takes from us all the same."

[dairy-farmer]

Growing up I had a friend that non stop sucked her fingers, (like pointer and middle together) like ALL the time. She did it when she slept, watching TV, when we were playing games, in public, even sometime between bites of food. She also would just talk with her fingers in her mouth. Her family and friends just learnt to understand her humbled speech and could totally understand what she was saying.

When we were still young and we would be out in public together I’d see grownups that didn’t know her get angry and tell her to ‘take her fingers out of her mouth’ when speaking to them. She was very shy and would cry and get upset and I remembered defending her a lot as a kid even though she was a bit older then me.

I remember I got us matching baby pacifiers once for a sleepover and i used one too so we could match. We took them to a summer camp thing and would use them at night because we were sharing a tent. The next day she was sleepy and didn’t want to stop using it even after we got up and had to do our first activity of the day. So I took mine and used it to in solidarity because she was shy and didn’t want her to be insecure. Some older boys teased her and she would just put her head down and not say anything. I remember giving one of them a black eye and dumped a bottle of water on the other.

Her mum was very hippie/ alternative so never told her off for it even as she got older. Her mum also homeschooled her and her siblings. By the time she was about 14 or 15 she wanted to attend the public school.

I was still in primary school at the time and she was in highschool and I remember she got bullied and tease by the other kids and yelled at by the teachers. She was super shy and embarrassed by it so she actively tried to stop. She told her mum she wanted to stop but couldn’t, so her mum tried all these different methods to help her stop.

I remember for about a year her mum tried everything, putting chilli powder on her fingers, Tabasco sauce, fish sauce, black tar and other things that would taste bad if she went to put her fingers in her mouth. At one point they even tried taping her finger together or using látex gloves that taste bad. They all kind of worked a little bit it mostly just made her super tolerant to spicy food and she would pull faces at the gross tasting fingers and just suck on them till the taste went away.

We all actively tried to help her stop. Would gently pull her hand from her mouth when we noticed it or give her something else to suck on. Another time we tried taping her mouth shut while she slept.

It took ages but she stopped doing it in public I think she still sometimes does it in her sleep or if she’s really comfortable around people or cuddled up on the couch.

…. Anyway, just Timmy 🥺

His parents always just shoving a pacifier in his mouth to make him stop crying. Then not caring enough to make him stop when he’s older or not being around to tell him off.

your poor friend 🥺 i think its unfortunately common for comfort habits or compulsive actions to be misunderstood or relentlessly pressed out of people 😥.

sometimes there is no deeper meaning than someone just self soothing and in tim's case i think that he would've definitely developed the association of security and comfort with the pacifier. tim's parent conditioning him to form an attachment with a pacifier whether he realized it or not because they can't be bothered to comfort him so the only thing that comforted him was a pacifier that he continued using until he was a teen. there was a scene in this one brutim fic where tim has a fixation on having things in his mouth and sucking on them and in one scene bruce is investigating further and finds a note from tim's first grade teacher talking about how tim was bullied for having a pacifier and that he shouldn't be using one at his age. that conversation is taking place while bruce is essentially trying to convince dick to let tim suck on them because he needs it 🥺. for tim i think it would play out similarly because its the one thing he can depend on for comfort!!

[lightlycareless]

Au where y/n takes her daughter to go see the barbie movie 🥺🥺🥺

Heya anon!

I'm sorry I took a while to respond, but I never forgot about this ask!

I gotta say, I was happy when I got it; I was in the middle of a trip I didn't enjoy very much, so it gave me something to look forward to when I got back home! So thank you so much for this and your patience!! 🥺❤️❤️❤️

As always, here is thy chapter warnings: pure fluff, a bit of... innuendos but like slightly, almost invisible, it's Y/N and Naoya being gross with one another, like a true couple lol. And some of the topics that the Barbie movie talks about.

Without any further ado, happy reading!

It took me a while to decide whether Y/N would take her daughter to watch the Barbie movie or not, considering its PG-13 (I’m going with the idea that she’s not a teenager yet, maybe around 7-8?) and it has some topics that someone that young might not understand or become frightened by them you know? At least that’s what I thought when trying to put myself in the situation if I had a kid that would want to see the movie.

But after going through that dilemma, I’ve finally decided that Y/N would definitely take her daughter to see it, but only once she checked some things first of course!!

Let’s set a bit of context first.

I’m assuming you must know what my fixation, or major one at least, is so imma say Y/N and Naoya met during college, fell in love, got married, and after a while (not so much, they wanted a family ASAP) and had a lovely daughter named Naomi 😊

Naoya is the “breadwinner” per se, the one that works most of the time to provide his family with a good lifestyle, and that he certainly did. He initially bought a small apartment when it was still just the two of you, because in your own words, “with him at the office, and yours in your, there’s no need for that many rooms.”

That immediately changed when your pregnancy was announced. If anything, it seemed there were not enough rooms now.

“Our baby needs a room to play with her toys. But what if she wants to draw, or paint?”

“We’ll set up a room for that, that way she won’t dirty her toys.”

“And if she wants to play with her plushies? I’m afraid she’ll get hurt by the soft-hard contrast of each other!”

“We can’t take any risks; I’ll order a plush upholstered room just for that—”

“No, all the rooms! What if she accidentally trips and hits herself?!”

Of course, they didn’t follow through with that, because after sharing their plans with fellow relatives, they were quickly talked out of it. Saying that it wasn’t for the good of the baby to grow up so sheltered, and their wallets. Something that Naoya didn’t really pay attention to, eventually convinced otherwise when suggested that instead of spending money on that, it could be saved in literally anything else.

Cue the expensive, never-ending gifts from Naoya. Whatever his girls wanted, they would get—he’s the next CEO to his family’s company, it would be stupid to act like he wasn’t!

Because he’s so doting in one aspect, he’s a bit reserved in the other, at least outwardly… and a bit inwardly too since this is all new territory for him—He didn’t grow up in a loving household where words and displays of affection would be done, but Naoya is really trying his best.

He still cares for you and Naomi, of course, he just lets money do the talking for him.

But worry not, where he lacks, that’s where you step in!

Taking the role of “stay at home mom” once announced your pregnancy, you’re the one that ends up all the time with Naomi, showering her affection, reminding her how much she’s loved by the two, as well as keeping Naoya up to date when he’s away.

Wherever Naomi went, pictures needed to be taken: either posing near the ducks of her favorite garden, showing off her new acquisition (you always bought something for her, whether she asked for it or not) or just enjoying a scoop of ice cream in a hot day, or when picking her up when school—didn’t matter, it had to be shared, and Naoya appreciated all of those pictures, keeping them in a dedicated album for him to look back on to when he’s feeling particularly down, although he always ends up a bit regretful because he wishes he could be there in person.

Because of your closeness to her, you’re the first person she runs to tell of her day, or whatever crosses her mind, thus Barbie comes into your life.

Outside of the craze that seemed to taint every living thing with pink, your closeness with her is what led you to learn that Naomi wants to see the Barbie movie, which you were more than happy to oblige to as you usually did, until of course, this became the first exception.

You always liked going to the movies with her because it usually meant an amazing day out altogether. It was either going to the park first, getting something to eat later, and watching a movie at the end of the day; or anything else really, whatever Naomi felt like doing—it didn’t really matter, because going out with her was enough for you.

In fact, as soon as Naomi came to you, with her big adorable golden eyes and her even cuter smile to tell you how she wanted to see Barbie —which you were waiting for, really, it’s what everyone has been talking about after all— you immediately pulled out your phone to buy tickets… but upon seeing the rating, you stopped.

It was the first time you’d have to tell her a maybe, instead of the decisive yes she was accustomed to, making her frown and pout out of confusion.

“Oh, it’s nothing! It’s just that I remembered I had some things already planned with my friends, but I’ll let you know when we can go, ok?” you smile, gently ruffling her hair before pulling her into a tight hug and peppering her cheeks with endless kisses, only ceasing when she whined you to stop.

You’d let her be soon after, while you… well, continued to debate whether to take her to the movie or not.

After all, the whole world seemed to be in on it: the dressing in pink, greeting each other Barbie, or Ken, blasting the classic song from Aqua and singing along to it… it was only natural that your cute daughter wanted to be on it too, hell, you even the parents of her classmates being on it too!!

As days went on, and you still had to make a decision, guilt began to settle inside you for having unwittingly made Naomi feel excluded.

You attempted to mend this by changing her school supplies to all pink, decorating her hair with pink accessories—clips, ribbons, diadems, you call it, she has it— or styling her uniform with whatever was allowed to be pink. Her school actually bent the rules to comply to the children’s wants, after being… “persuaded” by the parents to do so—talk about the privileges of being in a private institution!

It didn’t take long after that before Naoya was deeply intrigued by her daughter’s newest obsession; first it was some show she watched when she was younger, then it was zebras, and now, the color pink.

Ever the one to ignore things he considered mainstream, more so when they extended beyond his realm of interest, this caught him completely off guard; even getting the point of believing he was going mad because once he saw his daughter obsess with the color, he began to see it everywhere.

It was in Naomi’s school supplies, her clothes, even bedroom, everywhere he glanced, pink was in. Sure, by that point he was really intrigued to know the reason behind this craze, but it still wasn’t enough for him to ask.

If that’s what his baby wanted to be happy, then he’ll oblige. He wasn’t like those parents that didn’t have money to subsidy their children’s interests, so he was for sure not going to act like one.

His curiosity would only get the best of him one night when laying beside you in bed.

Naoya had other plans in mind for the night, which were quickly foiled upon seeing you hyper focused on nothing but your phone, scrolling through endless and endless pages of stores, social media, and articles, all relating to the cause behind his wonder: Barbie.

“What are you doing, Y/N?” he’d finally relent after minutes and minutes of being ignored, resting his head over your shoulder and draping an arm over your waist. “Surely your phone can’t be much more interesting that me.”

“No, of course not” You smirk, getting into a more comfortable position so he could see what you were looking at. “But I have to this first, or I won’t be able to sleep!”

“Is that what’s keeping you up at night?” you sigh.

“It’s Naomi—she wants to see the movie, but I don’t know if it’s the right thing.”

“What’s this?” he smirks “You? Telling her no? That’s a first.”

“And it hurts me to do it!” You pout, he kisses your cheek.

“Then what’s stopping you?”

“Because the movie is actually much deeper than I thought, and I don’t know if our pumpkin is ready for that.”

“What the hell can a movie about dolls talk about?” he scoffs, voicing the same thought you had when seeing the rating.

“Very interesting topics, actually.” you explain, and he raises his eyebrows. “Social topics”

“Oh”

“Yeah, and I don’t know if she’s ready for them yet” you sigh again, before turning off your phone and putting it to the side, finally allowing you to snuggle against Naoya, who didn’t hesitate to move in a way that allowed your head to rest on his chest.

“I don’t recall ever worrying about those things when I was her age, but I guess it can only go two ways” you say.

“Which are…?”

“She either learns from this or is horrified by it!” you shrill “And I don’t want to scare her! If only could know what kind of reaction she’ll have beforehand!!”

“Why don’t you watch the movie first before deciding whether to take her or not?” he suggests, and at that moment, like the sun breaking the horizon, a new opportunity opens before you.  

“That’s it! That’s exactly what I could do! And once I see it with my own eyes, I can debate whether it’s suitable for her or not” you look up to him, eyes glistening with excitement. “How about it, hm? Shall we go to the movies, like we used to back in the day?”

Naoya hesitates, for he doesn’t want to be seen watching that movie, but your pleading eyes, the same one Naomi uses when she wants something, as well as the cause behind it, gets through him, and soon finds himself complying to your demands—not like he didn’t do so anyways, but truly, you and his daughter have him wrapped around their finger.

“Alright” he murmurs with a pout. “I Guess I could clear up my schedule and go.”

You giggle, admiring how he loves to play hard to get, as if he wouldn’t drop everything for his family.

It’s quite charming, cute even, and you feel so lucky that only you can see that side of him. Although you wished he’d be a bit more open with Naomi…

“I knew I could trust you to clear up my mind” you smile, snuggling further against him. “My dear husband.”

“I’m glad I was of help, but…” he begins slowly, one of his hands sliding further and further down your body. “I know another way to clear up your mind, I can show you if you’d like.”

You bite your lower lip, face flustered as you around, wrapping your arms around his shoulders.

“Well, we can’t be too sure.”

You end up buying tickets for a showing two the days after, the day Naoya took off to go with you—it’s one of the perks of being so high up the chain in his job, he doesn’t need to give explanations or why he’s not going to work, he can just do it and that’s it.

Doesn’t mean his co-workers won’t inquire about it, more so when his day off was in the most random of dates.

Knowing this, the two end up going to a theater of his choosing, far away from the ones he considered busy, but still up to his standards, and of course, with extra cautionary steps to avoid being followed by his pesky relatives, and subsequently recognized.

“Naoya, honey, this is too much.” You’d say when walking towards the entrance, hand-in-hand with your husband. “Don’t you think we’re… attracting too much attention like this?”

Naoya wanted to go undercover, discreetly as possible so as to avoid suspicions, although his definition of discreet greatly varied from one another.

While you decided to wear a pair of jeans, and a comfortable pink hoodie (gotta follow the trend)… Naoya decided to go full on… well, he looked good, that’s all you’re going to say.

“What? Just because we’re going undercover doesn’t mean we’re going to do it… like that” he says, referring to an unsuspecting movie-goer and their… seemingly underdressed appearance. You gently elbowed him. He groans.

“Don’t be rude” you scold. “Besides, we’re standing out too much.”

You tried to be solidary to his appearance by wearing a pair of black shades, but now that you compare yourself to literally everyone else, it looks like you’re both part of the Men in Black.

“Then what do you suggest?” he asks, rubbing his arm where it still hurts.

“Lose the glasses” you suggest with a pout. “We look like total weirdos going into a building with them…”

“Hey, you agreed to it.”

“I mean, that was before we got here. It’s not my fault I just realized how silly we look” you say, swiftly taking off your glasses and placing them on their respective case before putting them away. “There, much better—besides, you’re too handsome to be hiding behind them!”

“That’s what it was, eh?” Naoya smirks, taking off his glasses; you grab them. “You just wanted to see me.”

You blush.

“And what about it?” you look away. “It’s been a while since we’ve gone out on a date just the two of us… not that I mind going out with Naomi, but… you know… it’s not the same.”

He sighs, giving you a smile before pulling your hand to his lips and kissing it. “I promise to go out more with you—just the two of us.”

Your heart flutters.

“I’d like that.”

After promises were made, you and Naoya go ahead to check in, deciding to buy popcorn and a drink—at first your husband said he didn’t want anything, saying something about a diet or so, but after getting a taste he succumbed to them immediately.

Once finding your seats and getting comfortable, the movie finally begins.

There isn’t much commentary to give at the beginning, outside of laughing at some of the silly scenes (mainly on your part, Naoya just scoffs) and how suddenly dark it gets from time to time. But outside of that, you and Naoya seem to think of the movie as… well, adequate for their daughter, nothing extraordinary, it certainly has the silliness she enjoys, making them wonder why it even got that PG-13 rating…

Until, of course, “real world” part; that’s when you and Naoya understand why many people thought this movie might be inappropriate for younger children.

There’s a lot of topics most kids don’t even fathom yet, ones that need the appropriate guidance of a caring adult, so they know how to handle them when they reach certain maturity.

It doesn’t take long before you and Naoya began to envision how confused Naomi was going to be upon seeing Barbie getting catcalled, kicked out of her house, the sudden change of behavior from the rest of the Barbie’s, and overall, the dilemma Ken has regarding his relationship with her.

But most importantly, the main point of the movie: existential crisis.

While Naomi would most definitely not understand that, or any of the past points, you and Naoya would feel the movie to be hitting “a bit too close to home” having been forced to reflect on these issues in the past as the young adults they were, either for their own individualism, careers, or their future as a couple…

Soon, they no longer worried how this would affect Naomi, but rather, how it spoke to them.

And by the time screening ended, lights turned on abruptly and revealing your and Naoya’s response to it: teary eyed, soaked cheeks, and speechless.

Your husband was quick to cover his face, putting his glasses on before anyone else got to see him in that state, whilst cursing how “there’s no respect nowadays” as he dried the tears on his cheek. You, on the other hand, simply wiped the tears out of your face, careless if anyone else saw you like that because first, it was a darn good movie, so yeah, you cried because of it. And secondly, you weren’t the only one crying in that room so who cares…

It's only until they get into the car that they realize one of the messages of the movie, at least the one they could relate to the most: their baby girl was growing.

In a few years, she’d be a teenager, bringing along all the struggles that come with such age, and then, a woman. One that will have to face the world on her own—because even if they will always be there to support her, there are some battles only she could take.

No one ever said raising a child was easy, less in a society as harsh as the one they lived in, but even with all their fears, it was something both still looked forward to. To create memories together, guide her through this difficult thing called life, and see Naomi grow into the wonderful person she was bound to become.

Getting the overwhelming need to see their daughter, you and Naoya skipped the rest of their plans and headed straight back home, where Naomi was eagerly waiting for them alongside her nanny.

The child was undeniably happy to see her parents back home, always did, but at this moment she couldn’t be anything but surprised when Naoya was the first one to rush to her, picking her up in her arms and giving her the tightest hug he could without hurting her.

“What’s wrong, papa?” Naomi would eventually ask upon feeling his hug go uncharacteristically longer than it usually does, as if him hugging her wasn’t weird on its own.

“Uh—nothing.” Naoya would say, doing his best to hide the tears in his eyes and the tremble in his voice. “Can’t I hug my princess?”

And while she’s never one to deny affection, Naomi can’t stop herself from looking at you perplexedly, as if seeking the answers of her confusion from you.

But you only reassure her with a smile, walking towards them and joining their hug. It’s then that Naomi concedes to simply accept her parent’s doting, nuzzling against Naoya as she reciprocates the hug, as much as her small arms could.

“How about we go out to eat?” Naoya suggests, looking at her with a smile. “We can go anywhere you want, pumpkin.”

Her eyes twinkle, for it’s no secret she’d been waiting for the perfect moment to suggest this place—not like she needed to, but she likes to organize her dates. You and Naoya chuckle, kissing her on the cheek, each on one side, a gesture that makes her blush out of embarrassment.

It’s safe to say that after careful consideration, both decided to take Naomi to watch Barbie, dressed up in the cutest, pinkest, most adorable outfit you could put together—with you and Naoya to match along, although more discreetly in your husband’s part, he still doesn’t get the pink trend, less when he was suddenly called Ken.

And as expected, the movie was a total success to Naomi, although there were moments where she’d look confused, but those were nothing compared to the ones where she’d laugh out loud.

Overall, it was a movie she greatly enjoyed, even with the confusions that came along: ones that both you and Naoya were prepared for, having long understood this could be the perfect opportunity to introduce to her.

She’ll understand half of it, perhaps even less than that, but it didn’t matter, for both were ready to support and guide her through every step, like the good parents they swore to be the moment her existence was announced—and that’ll never change. Even after the Barbie craze ends, when Naomi grows and no longer lives with them, they’ll never stop loving and supporting her.

Extra:

“How was your week—” Ranta freezes mid-greeting when something… peculiar catches his sight.

“What?” Naoya asks, not bothering to glance up from the paperwork he’s supposed to finish before the day ends.

“Is that—is that a pink tie?” he says, taking a closer look at the pastel pink garment contrasting against his black suit.

“Got a problem with it?” Naoya sternly responds. One subtle gesture is sufficient to have Ranta immediately retract.

“No, of course not!” he shrieks, nervously waving his hands. “It’s just— it’s just different. It looks good on you though!”

“I know” your husband groans, eyes still intently looking onto his desk… before eventually lifting his gaze towards Ranta, cheeks slightly flustered. “…I just got it; do you think Naomi will like it?”

“Huh?” Ranta blinks, Naoya frowns. “Oh, I mean, yes! I’m sure she’ll appreciate it!”

It’s a sentence that makes a smile break through Naoya’s lips as he glances back down to his work, satisfied.

“I’m glad” He match to see the look on his baby’s face once back home, after all, he just bought a bunch of clothes to match with her.

A/N: not me making Naoya cry and cover it up with his shades lol. Ah, he's truly devoted to his family.

[actualadamtaurus]

Right when we thought the writers couldn’t write Blake’s character further into the ground they pull out “Would you rather be a cat or a human?” bullshit. Like ???? She ISN’T part cat bruh she’s a goddamn human with genetics that give her animal like features. That’s literally the WHOLE POINT.

I don’t know how to better articulate it because how the hell do you even come to that line of thinking. “Do you want to be a cat or a human” seriously it’s the equivalent of asking me if I’d rather be a human or the color brown, and I just. Wtf.

IT'S SO BAD. I cannot even fathom how they could still be this oblivious to the fact that Blake is an allegory for a Black person in America, and so anything they write surrounding her is going to translate as commentary on Black people in America. And this whole volume has been weirdly fixated on Blake's faunus trait meaning that she is the animal her trait comes from? And generally just othering her from her teammates? Which is SO odd after they set up the faunus as people who strongly dislike being considered the same as their trait's source.

Not to downplay the incredibly uncomfortable implications about "simply choosing not to be a minority," but also as some kind of character moment for Blake, it falls so flat. We have never seen her struggle with her identity as a faunus, only the oppression that comes along with it. This sudden desire to shirk a responsibility we didn't even know existed (be a bridge between humans and faunus? since when?) feels like it comes out of nowhere.

Speaking from the outside as a white person - which, in fairness, most of the writers are doing too - I have seen that people's experiences with their race and culture are multitudinous, complicated, and sometimes even contradictory. I don't doubt that there have been times when someone wished they could no longer be a minority. However. That's an extremely sensitive and nuanced area to explore and certainly NOT something to suddenly spring on a character in a show that has repeatedly butchered its commentary on race. It was gross.

[menalez]

I'm an older butch lesbian who stopped trying to gather with other butches about 20 years ago because even then (where I was anyway) being "butch" was becoming all about being a "silverback", the "daddy", and so on.

Because I was trying to find community and camaraderie, I tried to hang out with it for a time -- but it ended up convincing me that in no way was I trans, and that even if I was, I would never act to "transition" because -- frankly -- these women were seriously gross. For example, when I was told I should transition despite any protests from my wife, that it was up to her to go along/etc., I remember thinking "So, we hate it when men demand women twist who they are to conform to male demands, but I'm supposed to insist my wife has to do the same for me?"

But the final end to me was reading a butch online forum and a woman talking about her new testosterone experiences, excitedly saying, "How do men keep from raping women all the time with all this (testosterone)???" I was so angry-repulsed that I backed out of all of it. Better to be alone than to hang out with -- I'm sorry -- but twisted perversion and personality disorders.

those ppl sound awful. my gf was once also involved a lot with the taiwanese butch community, there wasn’t as much of a fixation on transition tho but there was this strong like.. stone butch, super masculine, tall & skinny & can pass for male, binding to look more male type of culture. she said they judged each other very harshly and it was quite toxic so one day she decided she doesnt care about fitting into the community & would rather be comfortably herself.

its sad bc butch lesbians are quite ostracised and having a community would really be crucial for many, but it seems many butches only experienced a butch community that makes them more insecure & self-hating instead of helping & creating unity.

anyways sorry u saw some fucked up shit. the person talking about wanting to rape women is clearly deranged and ur right that if u were to pursue transition that its not ok to somehow guilt ur partner into being in favour of it (& if u rly want to transition & she rly doesnt, then clearly the relationship would have to unfortunately end)

[juszar2]

The sick obsessed prior employment partner I'd known what it was, and so when we were set to host lunch with an out of state potential business partner to bring services to the area, I was focused and had to encounter the sick obsessed up in arms telling me that Child Protective Services had come in and removed all of the children from the home of an immediate family member. She went on trying to tell me who she thought was responsible for reporting conditions. I did not want to know and she was again crossing lines that I'd been forever consistently trying to keep the boundaries in tact. All that I said was that I did not believe that the person would have done that. I changed the subject and tried to solidify the business deal. All that I could think of is how this obsessed could not see the gross that it had been likely over entire life and correlate the CPS situation. So this person attacked me for a good span of time obsessing and I had no idea... To include it saying that the disrespect and gross is also what it has "taught" its own. All of that.... And it cannot see how its deeds and the real self is nothing that could approach integrity. If a woman removes herself from your sick obsessed fixated "setup" con artist, demonic lowly behavior and spirit... You then attack her on a forum and obsess and discuss her. It is the most severe effort to reduce someone that I've ever heard of. Someone you did not even have a conflict with... So what would one say that this Sicko's problem is. Literal if she gets the hell away from, I'm stalking her. This and more is what this person is. Had tried to sabotage my exit, and then when God moved around it to let me out, opportunity accepted, it had been laying a scheme all the while grinning in my face and praising asking that I "believe in the mission" it's mission was to keep an income and favor in its presence.... By whatever means. Who in life has ever encountered this?

I'd have to live my entire life twice and get started now to compare to the lowliness and deeds this -it- has been. It makes no sense that you embark on such...but it could not imagine that I'd remove myself quite quietly and never see it again. That was apparently disallowed. Or else it said it would want to harm me. I found that so gross and still do today. I could vomit when I talk about, show it to other professionals, or think of it. Disgusting. I really could not believe the stalker that I inspire in some freaks. To be a person who is most often very quiet, but intelligent and I observe but... Silently. I thought to myself this has to be the worst case of obsession I've experienced yet. I really like private, dignified life so I knew that I needed to remove myself.

It found liabilities and like Satan does... Con's and pulls strings, sows division and brings conflict and turmoil. God forbid that I could have wiped any trace of the rot from my life. It is shocking. The con does not work on me. And so I will assist you but when the snake shows it's hissing at my life, I go ahead and remove myself from the snake. So odd that it had slithered with those unwise, especially at this age. But they're good at finding the weak. That one is older than me having had serious situations and is interested in having reproduced its sickness. And documented so. This is why there exists what does. It is ignorance, lowly, no dignity, no class, just personified and unbelievable. I don't try and understand it, I just don't want to live near it, know it, or have it obsessing over me. And again.... I was not even aware that this pining and obsession was following me. Had joined up with the homosexual. All I knew was that there was a lot of the element coming in and staff would mention the whole women living as men situation and more. But I would tell them I hadn't noticed and didnt even know this was such a prevalent thing. I lived a sheltered but respectful life. So everyone could do what they felt suitable for them. It just feels so gross every aspect of these people and knowing this possible toilet is like a woman and let folks see him used. Quite shocking. But there is even more than that with the prior employment partner sicko. The fencing, intercepting food funds in the US mail as it was processed, and even more is the rot that I lowered myself to assist and it did what it is... And showed folks publicly. And is certainly still stalking. Shocking. This whole situation is gross and if I'd not met a weak toilet paper outlined here on this blog, these low life's and adolescent homosexual stalker would be nowhere near my life. But it appears that there is a bitch*able slime like woman that I thought was a man who has caused this. It is shocking. This person claims conservatism and lies all day I know now. Quite shocking how far people can fall and what they would have attached to their name and life legacy. Otherwise they'd have to stalk me from outside of my life and discuss amongst themselves their feelings about a woman who wants absolutely nothing to do with them. Maybe still be so sever that they'd have still taken to a forum... But outside my life. Strange to live in the world knowing you are not a public figure... But you're stalked and you have met the lowest possible and he had me connect my life to him in an unchangeable way.

[electricprincess96]

Plus, when you want the best for something, doesn't it hurt to see great potential wasted?

Yes exactly!!!

3Houses was dripping in potential that was just never realised due to a variety of reasons. Mostly down to the player pandering.

Now here's the thing about me and fanservice. I have never been anti fanservice. I understand its a somewhat necessary part of making a marketable product and most of the time I don't care. Camilla is Fates? I didn't care about her design, in fact I quite liked it despite not being the expected demographic for her.

If fanservice starts to negatively impact the plot or the characters in a story that's when it starts to annoy me. YKB was actively held back as a character by the inclusion of her fixation of Block of Wood Sensei. Rhea and Seteth are held back by the existence of Byleth in the plot, and aren't allowed to actively be siblings who bicker by mostly agree on the fundamentals of their families continued survival because neither of them are allowed to admit there are people in their lives more important to them than Byleth and dare I say 3Hopes has made me realise just how GOOD the Nabateans could have been without Byleth's inclusion because the little snippets we got in 3Hopes of them together just talking and being a family with Cyril is GREAT.

Back to the topic of YKB I will stand by my previous assessments that her best written route is Azure Moon because the story frames her now as someone Byleth should care about thus we the player should but someone Dimitri cares about. And she's allowed to be the unchained, unshakable, immovable badass that she could have always been if the developers just let her. She's determined, she's driven, she's ultimately wrong but she has her goals and her ideals and she is not willing to give in to anyone, not Byleth and especially not Dimitri and to prove this she's even willing to throw away her humanity, the very thing she believes makes her better than Rhea. And even when shes beat, on her knees she still goes out fighting because she made her choice and she was going to die by that choice. THATS A COOL STORY. Its tragic thus it doesn't fit well for a self insert fantasy. But it was one of the few times this franchise let a female villain have some genuine agency.

It's things like that, that made me see that 3Houses had such great potential but it was never able to reach it all the way due to multiple aspects, mostly player pandering and lack of a continuity guy.

With 3Hopes, as I say above it does some things great like the Nabatean interactions but it also does some things very wrong and as much as I'm annoyed at Clod. I think YKBs mind reverting back to that of a 10 year old in AG might be the part I'm most pissed about because they'd never do that if she'd been a man. Like it's sexist and gross, and while a subsection of her fans have infantalised her since the games release its a lot different when the actual developers are playing into that. 3 Houses Edelgard would have much rather died there.

[littleeyesofpallas]

I don't normally post straight up headcanon, so consider this a disclaimer: don't mistake this for my normal attempts at reading into Kubo logic. This one's basically all me. (Also, goddamn i really gotta get better about not trying to preface or explain every little thought i have with some kind of evidence in canon. Like, shit, it doesn't matter...)

Anyway.... the headcanon go thusly: Mayuri and Senjumaru are both trans --Senjumaru's a very oldfashioned kind of transvestite accordingly with her kabuki(onnagata*) adjacent aesthetic, and Mayuri's of course a post-op transman but kept his name. (I want Mayuri top surgery scars fanart damnit!)

*Had to delete a big ol tangent here to save space, but Onnagata are men who play the roles of women in Kabuki theatre. Professionally an onnagata typically commits to playing women's roles exclusively throughout their career. And they have long since been coveted as a kind of "feminine ideal." (Which is kind of gross and problematic in its own right, but again not going into that here.) Point being, her having a few clear traits that align her with that specific image carries a lot of implications beyond just "maybe she's a dragqueen," that I feel this observations tends to get brushed away as.

We know Senjumaru has to be pretty old because as a Royal Guard member she's one of the original Gotei 13, and thus a contemporary of Yamamoto's... And even though Mayuri's age is pretty up in the air, we can kind of assume he's not that old because we know he knew Senjumaru before she ascended, and subsequently never really interacted with Seireitei again, yet it'd be pretty noteworthy if he was as old as the Gotei itself.

So, at a point before her ascension to the Royal Realm, I imagine Mayuri would've been pretty young. I imagine the then young woman would've been part of Senjumaru's oiran* style entourage, and hating every minute of it.

*Not gonna derail this with a thing on oiran, but google or wiki search it, it's an interesting facet of Japan's old social hierarchy, and honestly just kind of a useful thing to understand if you steep yourself in Japanese period setting media already. You'll probably immediately recognize the aesthetic and tropes from shows or manga you've already seen.

But I actually like to imagine that his first surgery, his top surgery, was performed by Senjumaru. Sewing is her specialty after all. But I get the feeling Mayuri wouldn't be satisfied with that and would deeper explore his personal dysphoria. And I pinpoint his trans experience as a dysphoric one because of the fact that we know he's clearly tampered with Ashisougijizo himself. His zanpakutou, the reflection of his inner self, has been tampered with. He sat down, meditated, convened with his own heart and soul personified, and then attempted to change it. (Okay I said this wasnt strictly textual reading but as a consequencd of kubos worldbuilding and character design this brushes up against some borderline bioessentialist BS. Please try not to take it to heart as some kind of broader worldview, I certainly don't.) Hence the elaborate investment in surgical medicine and prosthetic engineering.

I imagine this process of struggle also lead to a deepening split with Senjumaru over Mayuri's increasing fixation on surgical alterations --even beyond his rejection of Senjumaru's high value on the feminine, on gender as performance, and of her personal entourage which Mayuri would've implicitly abandoned when coming out as a man-- where her refusal to further operate on Mayuri for him would drive him to start experimenting on himself, as we now know him for.

But we also know that at some point Senjumaru was promoted to Royal Guard, and that part of that entails the creation of a thing foundational to Soul Society. Ichibee named everything, and kind of implied to have created Kidou (as his drawing of power from true names is basically what kidou spells are, and why incantations make them stronger.) Oh-etsu gave SoulSociety the asauchi/zanpakutou, Kirinji I guess just taught people to heal??? So, it seems like a pretty obvious conclusion given her skills set that Senjumaru's contribution was the creation of the Shihakusho: The shinigami's uniform.

Even though Ichigo is the only person to have a uniform explicitly tied to his spirit power, it feels like it's kind of implicit that for that to even be possible, the two have to have some kind of natural link. For the same reason that becoming a substitute shinigami on Rukia's powers came with the uniform.

But here's the funny thing... We never actually see her special clothes do anything... (and also they're all kinda boring, save maybe Renji's. We really could've potentially had a bunch of wild over the top outfits with gimmicky powers complementary to the heroes' own tactics --i guess we kinda got that with Rukia's snowgear. But still, we were robbed.)

What we do see is that she is powerful, fast, and subtle with her many mechanical hands*. So I don't think she actually created the Shihakusho, at least not by herself. And I don't think her real specialty is clothes, I think he real specialty is being a thief. I think Mayuri was working on his own projects and after something of a prolonged estrangement she approached him about some early form of the Shihakushou: clothing, a costume/uniform, that can literally empower the people wearing it...

*I feel like I should have some kind of explanation for those, as there's reason to believe she's missing her actual human meat arms from the shoulders down... and also it definitely seems like if someone built her elaborate mechanical doll arms, it probably would've been Mayuri? But I dunno, I got nothing...

And given their history together in this headcanon, I think Mayuri disagreed with it on principle. But Senjumaru's deft hands we know are good for more than just sewing, she's a lock pick as well. And I think she broke into Mayuri's personal workshop and stole the material she needed to complete her Shihakushou --and thus giving us some basis for her smug taunting of Mayuri when they come face to face again. But more than that, I think that when the importance of the Shihakusho became apparent, she was the one who had him committed to the Maggot's Nest as a means of silencing the one person who could reveal her fraud.

And I know I'm not the only one who saw some (seemingly) obvious set up during the TYBW arc for some very Shaman King-esque "twist" where once the King was replaced the Royal Guard would swap sides, as their allegiance was to the throne more than the person in it: so when Yhwach would inevitably take the throne, the Royal Guard would become the new villain gauntlet for the heroes, and Mayuri seemed pretty clearly poised to confront Senjumaru over their old beef.

[bokutoslittlebird]

As The Sun Sets

King!Oikawa x assassin!prisonser!reader

Warnings — implied noncon, implied smut, trauma and traumatic pasts, Bokuto’s back, Kuroo x Alisa ship, Ushijima x Yachi ship, chains, collar, leash, not pet play, I wrote this and haven’t looked over it since I wrote it so read at your own risk, implied past abuse, alcohol (champagne), arguments, cheating.. kind of

The loud noises around you never stopped; the switching of guards at every 6th hour, the occasional thief thrown into a cell near you and leaving within the same day after Kyōtani disciplined them, it never stopped. Each and every day, you’d sit down in the cell and wish Oikawa would instead cut off your arms and legs instead of his harsh touches and never ending conversation. Time had passed to the point, you weren’t sure if your own kingdom was waiting for your arrival back home, perhaps Bokuto actually spent time with his own queen.

Your thoughts were cut off by the familiar click of heels on the marble stairs. The time of arrival of Oikawa was sooner than expected, your dead eyes looking up to meet his bright and cheery ones. “How’s my favorite captive?”

“You seem awfully chipper. Is it time for my daily lashings?”

“Someone’s masochistic,” he shoots back, his grin turning to a smirk, before it washes off. “No lashings tonight.. if you’re good. I have a special dinner planned and you’ll be accompanying me as a plus one. It’s just me and my court, no one special,” he’s cut off by Hanamaki slapping his shoulder. “Okay, mostly nobody special. Just a dinner and then we can explore the castle. If you’re bad, however,”

“I’m sure Iwaizumi and Hanamaki would have me dead before I dared to lay a hand upon your precious skin,” you quickly reply. Oikawa seems to smile at that, enjoying your awareness of the situation. “That or I’ll be forced back into my place with an audience, which is it?”

“I’d rather have your blood staining my garments and splattered on my dish than have anyone have a glance of your skin, my darling,”

“That’s gross,” Hanamaki cuts in. Oikawa gives him a look, but he just shrugs. “I’m sorry, but you’re kind of weird. Do I need Iwaizumi to smack some sense into your head?”

“Can he even handle a smack from Iwaizumi? That guys had biceps the size of my head,” you interject, reveling in the pout on Oikawa’s face.

“If he holds back, yeah Oikawa can handle it. Then again—”

“Both of you, quit it! Formal invitation to a dinner with me, I’ll pick you up before the dinner. And Makki,”

“Yes, my king?”

“No cream puffs for you!”

“Now you’re just being mean.”

Oikawa and Hanamaki left right after, but their retreating footsteps made your chest ache. It’s better to be with someone, even if it’s the people you hate, you conclude. Hanamaki makes you laugh occasionally, usually with his quick retorts to Oikawa. Even when Kindaichi comes down, he’s actually talking to you when he delivers your food. Kunimi disapproves of it, but he doesn’t do anything. Kyōtani and Yahaba are still distant, but that’s expected when they have a stick up their asses. Matsukawa and Iwaizumi are hardly down here, but Iwaizumi is usually accompanying Oikawa for his late night activities. He never looks at you, turning to stare at the other side of the dungeon or leaving the dungeon completely while you suffer. Although he left the dungeons in the beginning, now he mostly stayed back to stare at the wall.

You wonder if it’s because his moral compass wants to help you. Oikawa invited him to join, but it was quickly turned down, claiming there was no joy in torturing prisoners more than necessary. Although he was always there and never talked to you, he was close to Oikawa. He didn’t stay down in the cells to hear your screams, but his hand on his sword said he was ready to move had Oikawa’s screams joined yours. Your restraints prevented your hands from doing damage, but he’s well aware your legs and mouth are able to do a bit of damage.

Laying in the cell, you watched as the guards switched. Kunimi and Yahaba were switched to Kindaichi and Kyōtani, complete opposites. Kyōtani was more animalistic than you originally thought, going off instincts first and he had sensitive hearing, eyes glancing to your form whenever you shifted. Kindaichi was there to make sure Kyōtani didn’t do anything he’d regret, that’s all. But you wouldn’t make any unnecessary movements.

Though the wait eats you up inside.

It is what feel like hours before the Oikawa comes down, the sun lowering itself in the sky as orange rays lay across your face. Oikawa clears his throat, disturbing your peaceful nap. “Time to get dressed. Hope you can walk.” Two handmaidens enter the cell, one holding a gorgeous aqua blue dress and the other holding silver accessories. Hanamaki is down there with him, ready to attack should you make a move. The diamond shackles come off, you releasing a sigh once your wrists are freed from the heavy confines.

Oikawa doesn’t seem scared, even as he stands beside you while his handmaidens strip you and dress you up. Your wrists ache and your legs are unstable, finding the lack of shoes to be a blessing in this state. The blue gown is not too elegant, but it’s strange to be in such a formal gown when your position in the kingdom is below a commoner. Silver accents line the bodice and litter the skirt, with some being simple sparkles while others shape into different flowers. Fabric is simple, mostly tulle as it feels lightweight and easy for your weakened body to handle. Oikawa himself places the remaining silver accessories to complete the outfit — the chains. Shackles are clasped to your wrists, leading to a silver collar that is secured into place. There’s another chain leading from the collar, but the end of it is a sapphire gem, secured in a diamond crystal. Extravagant and unnecessary, but Oikawa drops the crystal and you fall down with it, unable to hold your body weight up.

“Fantastic, everything’s in order,” he says. You growl as you try to get up, but the crystal keeps you from going too far. Oikawa picks it up and gently ushers you out of the cell, dismissing the handmaidens. He walks beside you, making sure you’re able to walk comfortably, with Hanamaki trailing behind. Supporting your weight as he guides you up the stairs and lets you go at your own pace. The cold marble on your bare feet is almost burning, but the ache in your legs is from not using them for so long. The chains don’t help, adding weight to your body while Oikawa holds the end of the metal leash in his hand. It’s a struggle to get up the stairs.

Making it above the dungeons, you’re practically hissing at the brightly lit corridor. Every nook and cranny is well lit, with soldiers standing guard few in between. One soldier gets your attention, however, who has a familiar frown you’re usually only blessed to see under glimmering crystal light. Iwaizumi comes over and nods, sending Hanamaki away and down the corridor, leaving the three of you alone. “I’m sure you remember Iwa-chan,”

“Yeah, he’s always down with you. I remember him,”

“Well, this time, you’re seeing him in a new light. He’s my guard and my best friend, so enjoy the new side of him while you can,” Oikawa speaks as if he’s talking to an old friend, waving his hands around as he leads you down the corridor. The aqua colored curtains and silver items seem to bring more light into the castle than before, even as the sun takes its final breath over the horizon and plunges the world into darkness. “You should take this opportunity to ask questions, my dear,”

“Iwaizumi, will you kill me?”

“Not unless Oikawa commands it,” he’s quick to reply, as if he was expecting it. You sigh and shrug.

“Okay, fair. Why do you stick with Oikawa?”

“We grew up together. Our fathers were friends, so it was only common sense for us to be so close. I’ve seen him in every kind of situation you can imagine. He’s usually crying over a girl, though,”

“Iwa-chan! You can’t be mean to me when we have a guest!” Oikawa immediately whines, covering your ears as if you can’t hear them still. “I’m the king, I don’t cry!”

“No offense, my Lord, but you cried when you tried to drink coffee in front of Lady Kiyoko, only to then sputter and cough because it was too bitter. She downed hers black and you requested hot chocolate. With extra milk.”

“Iwa-chan!”

“Oh, we starting early?” Another familiar voice spoke. Oikawa’s hands fell from your ears and you looked at Matsukawa. He’s as tall and imposing as the day he caught you running from the throne room. “Nice to see you’re still thriving. How are you?”

“I’d be better if I wasn’t caught by a horse,” you smirk, moving to cross your arms when the chains clink and stop you. “Suffering by the hands of your king, but still alive,”

“I’m sorry, but that’s a precaution,” he finishes, patting your cheek before turning to Oikawa. You have half a mind to try and punch him but Iwaizumi’s hand falls on your shoulder. “Everyone else is seated, my Lord. Is there anything you request?”

“Have Watari sitting next to [Y/N]. She should be close to someone nice,” Oikawa commands. The doors open after he speaks, Matsukawa holding the door open as he urges the group inside. Oikawa tugs you forward, with Iwaizumi following right behind you. Watari stands from his chair, bowing to you in a brisk meeting before pulling out your chair.

“Oh, thank you, Watari,” you bow to him. Oikawa seems to have his eyes fixated on you as you settle into the table. Looking around, you seem to notice how everyone seems stunned by your arrival, but their eyes seem to be trailed to the chains and collar.

Oikawa settles down next to you, clearing his throat. Holding up his glass, full of a shimmering golden liquid, he encourages everyone to do the same. The chains clink together, but you manage a weak hold on the glass, getting Oikawa to smile. “Tonight, let us toast to those who have lost their lives and those who have joined us. With that, we shall discuss the topic of the evening: the impending threat from Nekoma and Fukurōdani.”

“Eh?” You squeak out, drowned out in the cheers from the men around you. Oikawa gently clinks his glass against yours, putting your hand down after. You lean closer to him to whisper in his ear, “should I leave? This shouldn’t involve me,”

“Oh, don’t worry. Any news spoken of will never reach their walls. You’re stuck with me,” he chirps, patting your head before turning to Iwaizumi. “Any updates, Captain?”

“A group of ten went into the forest and only two came back. They’re being treated for trauma, but they won’t speak of much besides the ‘monsters in the forest’ and ‘they’re gonna die soon’, so we don’t have much.”

“I didn’t know Oikawa’s face was in the Dark Forest. Guess Lady Kiyoko showed it around town,” Matsukawa snickers at Hanamaki’s comment, who is grinning at a glaring Oikawa. “Speaking the truth, my liege,”

“We should decree a law where you don’t say the truth unless asked, Makki. You’re much to comfortable with loose lips,”

“Well, then who’s going to tell you you’re being weird or annoying? Matsukawa, would you?” He turns to the man sitting next to him, who has a large piece of meat stuffed in his mouth. He bites down and drops it, in a rather inelegant manner.

“I could never come up with good things like you. How ever would the castle live in Oikawa was unrestrained in his rule, never to be stopped?” He dramatically sighs, an eye opened to glance at a fuming Oikawa.

“You make me sound like a tyrant! I’m a good king! [Y/N], am I a good king?” With eyes on you, you pause in your eating of the mashed potatoes. Looking at him with no emotion whatsoever, you reply.

“You tie me up and force me in chains. Do you really want my opinion? If you’re looking to a prisoner to be on your side, I have a feeling you’re below a-” yet you stop, seeing Iwaizumi’s eyes boring into yours. “Below a tyrant, but not quite the kings I’ve come across.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” he nods, sitting back down. “Anyways, Nekoma and Fukurōdani will be hard pressed to reach if we can’t bypass the Dark Forest,”

“Kuroo and Bokuto.. they’re strong, but are they smart enough to know we’re infiltrating?” Yahaba asks, downing the last of his champagne.

“We could ask Ushiwaka,” Matsukawa suggests, but it’s quickly overruled by Oikawa’s firm ‘no’. “With all due respect, you’re allies with Shiratorizawa. Use it to your advantage?”

“Ushiwaka bested Oikawa’s army and they signed a treaty to be allies so Aoba Johsai wouldn’t fall,” Kunimi interjects. “Why would Oikawa-sama want to call on him for help?”

“Because we keep losing soldiers? Let’s have the Shiratorizawa soldiers die at the hands of forest ‘monsters’ instead of our own,” Matsukawa said as if it was obvious. The talk of the allegiance between the kingdoms was good news. News you could take and run with. Not only that, Oikawa confirmed that he is looking to go to Fukurōdani and is going into the Dark Forest. This is vital information.

Now only if you could leave.

The bitterness of those words evaporates your appetite, you setting your cutlery down as you stare at the unfinished food. It’s the first real food you’ve gotten since coming here, yet you no longer want it. Oikawa seems to notice you’ve stopped eating, ignoring the remarks from his court as he scoots his chair back. The action has you turning to him, only to have your body moving into his lap as you squeak. Your noises have attention on you as Oikawa cages you in his arms. “You need to eat, you know,”

“I’m.. I’m not hungry,”

“Lies. Your stomach is growling,” he puts potatoes on his spoon and holds it up. “Say ‘ah’.”

“I’m not a—” he shoves the spoon in your mouth, humming in satisfaction as his hand holds over your mouth. If you had an ounce of common sense, you’d swallow and not spit. Risking a beating or worse over eating isn’t worth it.

“Good girl, look at you,” he coos, giving you another spoonful. “Eating so much,”

“He got weirder,” Hanamaki chimes in. “Remember you have an audience, Oikawa,”

“Makki, hush. She’s enjoying it, aren’t you?” You don’t respond, simply looking at him. “That look says yes,”

“Actually, how-” he cuts you off with more food in your mouth. He seems so happy, stuffing your face with food. It’s almost the only thing you’re focusing on, had it not been for the chains and the men talking around you.

Matsukawa’s voice, once more, catches your attention. “Wish that was you, huh? Need someone taking care of our big, strong captain?” He makes a heart with his fingers, with Hanamaki doing the same beside him.

“As if. If anything, Oikawa needs to be fed properly because he’s always off doing something weird,” Iwaizumi retorts. His eyes occasionally glance at the two of you, his eyes catching yours.

“Oh yeah, earlier Oikawa was fixing his hair in the mirror before going down to the dungeons. Making strange poses, like this,” Hanamaki tries to demonstrate, puckering his lips and winking while pointing at you. You giggle at his pose, although Oikawa seems to be fuming. “Or like this,” he winks and holds up a peace sign, putting the other hand on his hip. “It’s quite disturbing, actually.”

“Oh, did he do the kissy face?” Matsukawa then winks and blows a kiss to you, who’s now fully laughing at their actions while Oikawa puts his face in your hair.

“I don’t do weird poses! I have to make sure I look elegant and kingly!”

“You act like a woman who’s never seen themself in a mirror, Shittykawa,” Iwaizumi interjects. Oikawa then pouts, but you pat his arm. He seems hopeful when you do, but his eyes fall as you grin at him.

“You always look at yourself in the diamond bars, too. You love yourself that much? Narcissistic king,” you snicker. Oikawa’s jaw drops as Hanamaki and Matsukawa start to howl, as if you said the funniest thing ever. Iwaizumi sports a small smile, but he hides it by chewing on his food.

“Well, someone’s comfortable,” Oikawa pouts, but he keeps you on his lap. You’re no longer being fed by his hand, but he does take care to check if you’re still eating.

The dinner is mostly uneventful after that, turning into a mostly political discussion that involves Aoba Johsai’s army and possible future cooperation with Shiratorizawa. Oikawa keeps you secured, perfectly perched on his lap the entire time. Eventually, a guard comes in to interject, telling Iwaizumi that there’s a problem he needs to go oversee. Matsukawa and Iwaizumi leave, with the rest of everyone eventually being dismissed.

Oikawa takes you on a walk of his castle. With no other guards, you find yourself more open to talk and Oikawa opens more to you, encouraging your own tale in exchange for his. He takes you to his throne room, the place you two technically first met. He tells you about his father, how he brought him into the throne room for the first time to watch a petty thief beg for his life. A horrible story, one that makes you feel like you have to give him another story of your own. Torn between telling him your secrets and telling him nothing at all, you tell him your parents abandoned you at a young age.

“Both of them?” He asks. You nod, but his eyes show the sorrow you don’t feel. “You’ve been on your own for so long, not even a childhood friend?”

“One. We were close, but things changed as we got older. He.. changed. His mission was to protect and mine was to attack. Opposing sides, yet you’d think our friendship would outweigh that.” The tale is true, but elements are missing. Oikawa doesn’t pry, moving onto another topic. The trail down the corridor is familiar — back to the dungeons.

Oikawa comes and visits you at random times of the day, now. He offers his hand to take a walk around his castle and orders his handmaidens to dress you in some gown of his own choosing. Each walk breaks down more and more walls, soon enough you’re looking forward to talking to someone. Oikawa doesn’t pry more than he needs to, but he does encourage you to vent all you want. He’s there for you and your secrets are sealed behind tightly shut lips.

Your secrets are brisk, hardly showing too much vulnerability and brushing over the kingdom you’re from, or even what king you work for. Oikawa has an idea, but he doesn’t ask for you to go into any details. Oikawa tells you of his father and how he was cruel, saying only those who carried out his orders without questions were loyal. The ripe age of 16 wasn’t kind to Oikawa, having to wake up and find that the captain of the guard had poisoned the king, then himself. Iwaizumi was almost tried for treason, but he had been out on a mission with other soldiers and was pardoned per Oikawa’s request. They grew up together and Oikawa trusts Iwaizumi with his life, even if Iwaizumi shall turn on him one day.

It isn’t until the last walk do you spill the secrets and the names. Aoba Johsai’s garden is gorgeous, with blooming white and blue flowers, white marble fountains that hosts swans and other living creatures, frolicking in the crystal clear water. Oikawa makes it unbelievably awkward, with his constant closeness as he journeys with you around his garden. He brings up that his mother was beheaded before his eyes and his father told him that women are only meant for childbearing and are cruel creatures, only because she didn’t love his father. Oikawa has no Queen because he focused on growing and securing his kingdom, yet now he is expected to marry and have an heir by the end of the month. It isn’t harsh, it shouldn’t have broken you, but him settling on a bench in front of a red rose bush and crying has your walls shattering like glass.

“It was my mother’s favorite flower. That’s why I made so many blue and white flower bushes. This was the last thing she gave to me,” he had said, through his sobs. It was heartbreaking to see a prideful man cry in front of you, so you hugged him and told him the truth.

Your mission was to kill him under King Bokuto’s orders, sent as his personal assassin. You’re under his rule because you failed a previous mission. Finding comfort in Oikawa’s tragic past, finding it to be something nobody should carry alone, you console him. An assassin and a royal mistress for Bokuto, you abide by each one of his orders lest you find your own blade turned on you. Oikawa turns to hug you, letting you cry into his own chest and just sit in the garden, under the setting sun, ranting about anything and everything.

“Bottling things up isn’t good, you know. That’s why I have Iwa-chan. He seems mean, but he’s never once attempted to hurt me,” he murmurs, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “Bokuto seems like a tyrant,”

“He’s a good guy, he’s just... he’s the best warrior in the kingdom and prides himself on being the best king to live. He used to be cruel and merciless, but he has his moments. He can be soft and has his down moments, he just hides them behind closed doors. He was cruel to me, but he’s changed,” you try to reason, but Oikawa looks at you. “Really.”

“What would you get if you killed me? Let me guess, freedom? He would let you go? After you killed the king with security tighter than his? If you managed to kill me, you wouldn’t make it past the entrance of my castle,” the confirmation of accepting a doomed mission is bitter in your mouth. “You’re valuable. Bokuto wouldn’t just let you go like that. He’s not planning to give you freedom,”

“No, that’s— that’s wrong, he promised-”

“But I can offer you salvation. It’s not freedom, you’ll be stuck here, but you’ll be able to be free of Bokuto’s clutches. Will you take my hand?” Oikawa leans back, showing you his hand. Looking st you, you don’t move.

“What.. what is it?”

“Be my queen, [Y/N]. Bokuto can’t reach you if you’re here with me. Can you honestly tell me you want to go back?”

The thing is, you can’t. Taking his gloved hand, he brings you into his embrace and presses his lips to yours. For the first time, your hands clutch his shirt and you kiss him back.

It’s only a promise in the garden, yet the next morning, you find yourself in Oikawa’s bed, laying next to the naked king. It’s a strange thing to wake up to, but Hanamaki is entering the room shortly, quickly covering his eyes. “I saw nothing,”

“Hanamaki, not to be rude but, you’ve seen me change like 20 times. Why the hell are you turning away?”

“I’m a respectful man! I wouldn’t look at a lady and my future queen with such indecency,” he says, only go and try to wake up Oikawa with closed eyes. His words stun you, having the previous night really settle in and Oikawa actually asking for your permission before indulging in your body. Then the questions pops into your head, remembering Oikawa’s offer. A look at your hands — chains are gone and a silver ring with sapphire is on your finger. That settles that dilemma.

“I’m up, I’m up! What is it?!” Oikawa shouts, popping up from his cocoon. Hanamaki sighs, eyes still closed.

“I know you had a busy night, seeing as we could hear you, but you have responsibilities. Tonight is the banquet with the other kings. News of you getting a queen spread like wildfire, so they’ll probably want to deal with that before anything else,” Hanamaki explains. Then he points in your direction, though it’s at the wall. “And you need to be ready for their onslaught of questions. These kings prefer political marriages over marriages of love, so you need to know how to defend yourself.”

“No need. They wouldn’t dare ask her any questions if I’m taking care of them. I’ll be down shortly, let me dress.” Hanamaki bows and leaves, letting you heave a sigh as the door clicks shut. “Don’t worry, my dear. Bokuto won’t be able to lay a finger on you.”

“Bokuto’s going to be there?! He probably thinks I’m dead, Oikawa!” You panic, getting out of the bed to dress yourself. “I can’t— Kaori will be there too, yes? I can’t do that,”

“You’re untouchable, completely safe in my arms,” he’s behind you, hugging you close. “I’ll have you seated beside me and put Ushiwaka’s queen next to you. She’s harmless and sweet, you’ll be fine. Bokuto will look, but not touch. Trust me.”

Trust him, you do. As the day passes, you’re thrown into different outfits and putting on heels that make your feet hurt. Your hair is done elegantly, as if you haven’t been living in a dungeon for almost two months. Make up is done to make your face look a bit more lively, compared to the dead inside look you normally have. By the time Oikawa sees you again, it’s time for the dinner. You’re brought to the doors of the dining hall, listening to the chatter from inside. Bokuto’s voice is loud and clear, making your insides churn. But Oikawa is right next to you, smiling and letting your hand rest of his arm. Iwaizumi announces the two of you and lets you both walk in.

Avoiding Bokuto’s eyes, you settle down in the chair, but you feel him staring at you. Kaori has a small gasp that is quickly overlooked, but you’re sure it’s because of you. Ushijima and Kuroo seem to be on edge, but another king you don’t know of seems at ease. Oikawa settles down and clears his throat, requesting the food to be served.

“Oikawa, what is this?” Bokuto speaks through gritted teeth, yet his eyes are on you. Oikawa grins, holding your hand for him to see. “She doesn’t look like anybody we know about.”

“Well, to tell you the truth, Bokuto-san,” Oikawa begins, ready to spin the tale of your meeting together. “We met as she was tending to my garden. She would offer me an ear and listen, then I would listen to her troubles. Soon enough, we were both falling in love. She told me her family is going to have to move soon and I offered her a reason to not leave. Her position is but a commoner, yet I love her as if she was royalty,”

“Oikawa, shouldn’t you focus on expanding territory or a political gain over love?” Ushijima interjects. His booming voice startles his queen, which prompts him to lay his hand on her head and apologize. “If you want love, there are mistresses you can take up,”

“Yeah, Oikawa, love isn’t the reasons we get married. You have options, you know? Some nobody gardener isn’t worth it,” Bokuto’s words cut deep, even if they’re based on the lie spun. Kuroo interjects, before Oikawa can say anything.

“I don’t see a problem. I married my queen for love, so it shouldn’t be a big deal?” He tries to ease the tension, smiling warmly. Bokuto’s quick to create more tension.

“Kuroo, you married Lady Alisa because you expanded your territory to the Northern continent and gained three new ports. Love or not, she came with political advantages,”

“Ushiwaka, didn’t you marry for love, too? Yacchan didn’t have much political gain, the Princess of a kingdom in the southern isles. You got a port and some handful of new citizens, not that great,” Oikawa says, folding his hands and smiling at Ushijima. Yachi mumbles to herself and twiddles her thumbs, but doesn’t do much else. You pay her arm and smile, trying to make her less uncomfortable.

“To be fair, unless you go to another continent, there aren’t any women who can stand up to the challenge of being a queen,” the strange king says, then gestures to his queen. “Mai was given to us as an offering by the previous Dateko tribe,”

“Futakuchi, I don’t think that counts as either political nor romantic reasons for marriage,” Oikawa says, but quickly dismisses it. “The point is, I’ll marry who I want to marry and I chose to marry this woman. She will be my bride and give me an heir. That is final.”

Nobody speaks against him, but the seriousness of the situation has you feel queasy. Leaning over to Oikawa, you tell him you’re not feeling good. “Iwa-chan, take my queen-to-be to her room, she isn’t feeling well,”

“Yes, your majesty,” he bows and helps you out of the chair. Guiding you out of the room, you take a quick glance to Bokuto, seeing him still watching you. It makes you feel even worse. The doors shut behind you and Iwaizumi leans down to whisper to you. “Do I need to walk you to your room or do you need fresh air?”

“Some fresh air, please. I don’t really want to go back,” You mutter. Iwaizumi nods, then gives you directions to the garden. “Thank you, Iwa-chan,”

“Don’t push your buttons,” he growls out, waiting for you to leave before entering the room again. Seeing as you’re mostly alone, you sigh and take in shaky breaths. You’ve never felt so helpless before, unable to do anything or save your pride. Kaori and Bokuto expected you to be dead, not sleeping with Oikawa. But now they— no, he knows. He will find you and use honeyed words to bring you back, but you must be strong.

A throat cleared behind you has you whirling around. Expecting someone you’re familiar with is a given, but you didn’t expect to see Bokuto standing at the entrance. “Hello, my little bird,”

“Go away, Bokuto. I don’t want to deal with you,”

“I told you to kill Oikawa, not sleep with him. Now you’ll be his queen? Do you not want your freedom? Or is this an elaborate plan?” His arms are wide as he moves towards you. You back up, watching his face drop and pout. “Not a plan, is it?”

The lack of care in his words make you think he’s gotten rid of any guards nearby. Deciding your life is better than telling the truth, you lie. “I’ll come back. I got caught my first day, so I need to wait for an opportunity.”

“That’s my girl,” he’s close enough to hug you, pressing your body close against his. “I’ve missed this. You next to me. Me inside of you,”

“That’s vulgar and very gross, sir,” you cringe. He laughs, but it’s short. Then, he’s tilting your head up by your chin. “Boku-” he cuts you off with a kiss, pressing his tongue against your lips. Wanting him to leave you alone as soon as possible, you let him kiss you and bury your fingers into his sleeves. His grip on you tightens, a growl from his throat as he lets his hands brush against your ass. Feeling his intentions go beyond a simple kiss, you retreat and look away so he doesn’t pout. “Not here. Not now. You have to wait.”

“Then I’ll wait. I’ll wait for you to be with me once more and I await the news of King Oikawa’s lifeless body. Remember what I can give you. Oikawa wouldn’t grant you freedom, only I can,” he murmurs the last bit in your ear, pressing a kiss against the shell before leaving. The wind blows as you retreat further into the garden, feeling your cheeks wet with tears.

With only the sun setting as your companion, you find yourself wondering if you made the right choice.

[steve0discusses]

Yugioh S5 Ep 19: Yugi and the Only Neck Accessory He Didn’t Really Want to Wear

Been busy! Hopefully stuff will open up soon as I’m taking a hiatus on a different quarantine project and will be finishing painting the entire roof of my car this week? One can hope. Sanding the rust off the whole top of a car takes a long time it turns out?

Also, fun Yugioh fact, I recently painted a book cover for an author who is older so she’s never seen the show, and she looked at my tumblr, saw my Duke Devlin fanart and was like “That’s him. That’s my main character. OMG. You captured him perfectly!” and I was like “Ma’am that is Duke Devlin, hence the single dice earring on his lobes there, but we can work with this.” and now a spiritual Duke Devlin is on the cover of a Wuxia-style fantasy trilogy on the Vella. Had to give him a top knot and delete the eyeliner for Wuxia reasons but uh, that’s just Duke.

So long story short, fanart can get you work, don’t even worry about posting that stuff online because most people don’t even know it’s fanart anyway and older ladies freakin love it.

Back in Yugioh, the team was doing their best to navigate a map through the woods and they do about as well as they normally do.

And inside Tristan lifted up the floorboards and was like “I found the only way out, this is it, this is the only way.”

And they ended up in something that has a color scheme I would actually associate with a jungle. Finally. We have finally left California (in order to go to another Hell.)

Youknow, when we went to California, we visited Hell, and when we went to India, we also took a stop at the nearest death destination. There’s just so much death on this show and sometimes I forget because there’s been a ghost in our party for so freakin long it’s been normalized.

(read more death imagery under the cut)

Joey freaks out at a flock of crows and reveals in this episode something I never realized about him before.

Like I’m not always the perfect observer as I’m sure you’ve noticed, but I love that this is canon for probably only this episode, but I will never forget it for the entirety of this series.

You go on hating birds, Joey.

Bro was like “Maybe it’s a deep cut about Mai Valentine because she’s a harpy lady” but eh...pretty sure we spent like an entire season of Joey telling us that Mai was a good experience? Would be incredibly funny if immediately after all of S4, Joey was like “You know what? Screw Mai, guys.”

So my thoughts...it’s probably just a literal bird experience. Like I had a friend who hated deer because once she went to a petting zoo, got some pellets to feed the deer, but her finger was sticking up, so when the deer came over to nibble on some pellets her finger went up it’s nose by accident. She was so disgusted by this event that was entirely her fault, that she brought up how much she hated deer basically whenever we saw one.

So like...maybe Joey fed a bird wrong at a petting zoo. I can see him getting bit by a parrot because he was too Joey Wheeler.

But now that we’re in a graveyard neighborhood, Pharaoh decides to hop out because there’s a lot of ghosts here and he needs to practice socializing with his peers.

So that’s just a Yugioh monster doing the ostrich dance, right? Like this is a meme from like 2010 but on Yugioh in 2003(4?)

Good to see the Ostrich dance here in the land before Vine.

So they pull out their Pokemon to do some antics, Tea looked like she was about to do something useful, and Yami does a yump across time and space to get her as far away from playing (not)cards as quickly as possible and y’all...sure was a position these animators animated.

Holy crap.

And I was going off about that scene last season where they woke up in the same bed like...

...have these two been together this entire time? Like together together?

They’re like...way more comfortable than you’d figure they’d be considering Yugi nearly passes out every time he gets a hug. But Yami just like....How long has this been going on? As long as Joey’s fear of birds?

Like obviously this show would never cover what the hell Yugi may be thinking about this overreaching move here, because we’re gonna gloss right over that, and just run away up a flight of stairs. No one mentions this ever again. Which is mind blowing for an anime to do. I think in most anime I watch, the kids would be like “ahh ahhhh I bumped into a booooob!” like it does for I want to say every other episode of My Hero Academia. But in Yugioh, they saw that low hanging fruit and they were like “we expect a higher level of maturity out of our audience. Now here’s a fleet of ostrich dancing tree monsters with faces for crotches.”

They decided to sprint up this flight of stairs, and it enough of a slope to deter the monsters who are only unbalanced weird legs.

I want us to take a moment and admire this background painting. I can’t unsee the rocks that are all the same size, just piled on top of eachother. Did Alexander the Great just plop rocks here--or was the mountain made up of tons of similarly shaped boulders?

Like there’s a lot of nice bg’s in this arc, don’t get me wrong, but this one...I’m just trying to wrap my head around the logic of it.

At the top, they meet a pantheon, that is immediately blocked by this wall, because if this arc had a tagline, it’s “Yugi gets inconvenienced every 4 seconds.”

Bro was like “Clearly they would have pushed it over if Tea wasn’t slacking off” and like...she is actually. Look at her. Only used one hand? Slacker.

Joey was disappointed he couldn’t push over a massive wall, and the team decided not to analyze how much Joey Wheeler thinks of his own strength and instead fixate on these statues.

Usually in anthro characters they kinda look birdlike but act human. But what about an anthro that’s just a bird? Like human torso, but can turn his head 180 degrees? Yugioh made me ask this question.

And then Joey was like “wait, there may be a solution that isn’t just to use brute strength!”

Youknow it is a bummer that Kaiba couldn’t witness Joey own a dragon while he himself only has a robot jet dragon. Although, the jet is probably faster, stronger and overall...better than this baby dragon. It would have been great for Kaiba to witness Joey under-utilize this dragon and forget he has it for like huge swatches of the episode.

And then Grandpa pulled some body horror out of nowhere.

Wow.

I mean that is really gross.

I guess Grandpa can’t use Blue eyes, because Kaiba ripped it up, Grandpa can’t use Exodia because Weevil tossed it off a boat, and grandpa can’t use the card that’s just a building because...it’s a building.

So instead Grandpa has a bunch of meat and bones that look like something out of Doom. It’s probably from a more obscure Konami property, but I forget which.

I’ve seen Tristan hold back Joey in this hold, first time it’s been Tea.

So much shipping in this episode, it’s wild.

It’s also wild how low my standards are for what could possibly be shipping when it comes to Yugioh because of how freakin tepid all of these characters are, which as I’ve brought up before, I really don’t mind.

So Yugi decides that because Grandpa was folding his arms like one monster and it made a gem light up or something, to just do the video game thing and use the giant ass statues as clues.

Why was this arc not a video game? Like parts of it really feel like it was meant to be.

So Yugi falls down a hole, where the walls cave in like it’s that dumpster in Star Wars but like...it barely phases him.

Also...Yugi might be able to see in the dark. It’s never been brought up but like...the more I think about it...has Yugi ever struggled to see without the lights on?

After Joey disappoints everyone, he confronts death.

And Pharaoh and Yugi decide to solve the puzzle of “how do I get out of this trap dungeon room” which, honestly, is probably what they’re doing every time they hang out in the brain pyramid.

So they summon their mascot monster, and surprisingly the show decided its ability to fly cannot help them out here.

Kuriboh manages to become enough of a doormat to push Yami up to the stone and they end up in a set of weird cuts that ended in this?

Like seriously it was like flashes of light and then they were just...up here like this.

Hey like...

Alexander the Great, my man...

Were you planning to put that stone in the middle of a exhaust vent hoping someone would touch it? Because there’s no way anyone would rationally have done that. You would need to fly to do it. This is the world’s worst DM.

Like Yugioh pulls a lot of fantasy nonsense but this arc is a lot more like a “it’s a kid’s show, just go with it.” arc than most of them. It’s not a bad vibe, necessarily, it’s just not the vibe I’m used to.

So once I witnessed maybe the most boring conversation I’ve ever witnessed about corn (this was on a twitch stream, by the way, a guy was playing an interesting game, and then a guest came on and started talking about corn and plants for 2 hours) and they would not shut up about how all taxonomy is wrong because there are no such thing as trees and how all animals are labelled incorrectly, and then they started comparing it to like all sorts of mushrooms and phytoplankton as you would if you clearly got a little bit high before dumping your corn knowledge on a twitch stream.

Anyway, after that bizarre experience I suffered so I could learn how to play an obscure video game, I think I can safely say, that while I know everyone here thinks a bird can’t be a dog. If you’re a high biologist: a bird is absolutely a dog. Apparently you can just do that if you’re the most boring biologist alive and no one will argue with you because to do that would involve talking to you. We’ll just say a bird is a dog and no one can fight me or I will talk about the corn book that this guest on this twitch chat was thinking about renting from the library about the different types of corn mutations inherent in freakin Indiana. Therefore, Joey’s fear of birds and dogs is same.

So they use Dark Magician to save them from the statues, and Yugi busts into the pantheon again because they got to open this casket before a time limit that I kind of forgot about, tbh.

And inside the casket, is...this thing!

(enjoy this line on the bottom of the image I don’t feel like fixing it)

And you may say to yourself...it looks like it’s just floating in mid-air, that’s silly, and so I want to introduce you to the next panel where you can see that it is...quite literally...just floating in the air like a video game.

and it just slurps itself onto Yugi before he can be like “nonono.”

Wasn’t there some horror movie where you were stuck in some sort of body brace that slowly tortures you (was that Saw?) This has that vibes. Like man that looks uncomfortable to wear over a jacket and two belts and a collar that is another belt.

That and I...I gotta appreciate that Yugi popped his collar while wearing body armor and chunky necklace. What 00′s fashion appreciation right there.

Bit like...this isn’t breathable, right? Like Yugi’s gonna finally take this thing off and his jacket will just be completely soaked in sweat?

Anyway, that’s it for this post, next week we’ll see if Yugi can walk through a doorway in that thing.

Also, I can’t bring up the ostrich dance without sharing the vines of my generation

[words-are-my-soul]

Reading Gotham Academy #2

We have one very cool cover.

The Diary of Millie Jane Cobblepot - Nov. 1863

No. 11th "Today I am changed. Without looking glass or even basin of clear water at my disposal I am able to perceive the aberration. I fear it be not by the hand of my divine maker. I fear it especially as I am made stronger by it."

Nov. 12 "Father asked me again for its location. I told him I did not know. He promises me release from my captivity but the walls whisper not to trust him; and so I don't."

Millie Jane Cobblepot was an isolated, imprisoned girl, haunted by a supernatural force that was as scary as it made her feel powerful.

No wonder our traumatized Olive identifies with her and is so fixated by her diary. She might not be alone but trauma sure has a way to make you feel far far away from other people. Also, magic.

Millie Jane dreams of her father and his untrustworthy promises of freedom and love. She jumps to him, he turns out to be never ending black, she says darkness is her only true shelter.

Olive says she would welcome a little darkness upon seeing the bat signal. Which might be worrying, in hard times, yeah, a little darkness seems desirable.

Olive sees cultists.

Our girl is exhausted, people talk about the ghost, clanking through the halls and to top it off Pom is engaging in some gross PDA.

Teens stop making out in the center of a full classroom, making everyone present very uncomfortable challenge.

Pomeline I love you but no.

I'm surprised Olive hasn't started banging her head on a table.

Some make-out sounds are...difficult to ignore.

Professor McPherson arrives, sees the girls bickering and makes them do a history project together.

Putting two people that can't each other together is recipe for disaster, ma'am.

Shouting, crying, hair pulling... I've seen it all.

Lunch time!

Hey, it's this weirdo time! I've always felt bad for this dude.

Olive you should try out for the track team, running away from Kyle so much it's bound to be good practice for that, especially since he's a good athlete.

Can't really blame her, though. It's difficult to come back with trauma and feel that you don't fit in your old life anymore. Must be worse with a boyfriend you can't talk to.

Maps you have 0 radar for "awkward".

Maps, no. You don't say that to an artist.

And a D&D character? I guess they had to replace the ol' good "Can you draw me?"

After that incredibly clean escape there's even more awkward in the library with Pom.

That's the teenage life, awkward with more awkward sprinkled on top.

I still can’t remember how I feel about you, Kyle.

Hello Edward Nygma.

Hello mysterious pretty boy that's definitely not human.

Also, it's somewhat difficult to stand up to the spiteful people in your life when you don't have the energy for confrontation or courage to beat the anxiety. Sometimes it's better to roll your eyes and be dismissive, bitches hate when they can't get to you.

Anyway 15 years olds can be insufferable and hurtful and Pomeline is an example of that (And Olive too, in a "I don't want to deal with this so I will run and be defensive" way).

Professor Riddle sus.

They find a copy of the Diary of Millie Jane Cobblepot (whom I keep naming Millie Bobbie Brown in my head thanks to a friend of mine with an Stranger Things obsession) with a lot of interesting info.

Sigh.

The downside of adoring reformed bad kids is having to wince so much at the beginning.

Being called crazy when you have questioned your sanity before strikes a special kind of nerve.

Because it makes you question "Am I?"

Colton, my boy, you gotta know your audience.

Knowing Gotham that probably is a human (or human adjacent) bone.

Olive stalks her maybe ex boyfriend and runs into teacher McPherson smoking and walking her dog.

That is mostly solid advice, though even if it’s imposible for an event to completely change someone, it could change some important aspects of a person (and some people don’t like that). But yes, you’ll always have at least a little bit of the good things you think lost in yourself.

I love this kid. Just absolutely ready to destroy that wall, no hesitation whatsoever.

Yeah let’s just follow that cultist.

What could go wrong?

“I’m stepping on dead people” Did I mention that I adore Maps? What a brave and absolutely not squirmish child.

This kids have like 0 self-preservation instincs and I love that about them.

Let’s enter the crypt!

The girls find a secret entrance.

BATS! Someone protect this girl.

Aaaaaaand the cultists aren’t so mysterious now.

“Maybe it’s okay to lose it every now and then, maybe it’s okay to to let a little darkness in.”

Damn. That is a powerful line.

A little bit of harmless crazy is okay, gives life a little flavor.

Just make sure it doesn’t consume you.

[egyptian-sun-god]

Never Have I ever S2

SPOILERS.....Turn back now I’m serious.

I’m waiting....

Okay cool your fault at this point

I was fairly critical of NHIE S1, I won’t lie. And I’ll be real I still stand by the fact that NHIE S1 was fairly meh overall. 

But holy shit, they knocked this season outta the world man. The show really really found its proper footing this season. They were smart to keep the cheating for only two episodes and explore the repercussion for the other 8. 

1.Devi Vishwakumar.

Let’s start with the main character.  Devi still does immensely fucked up shit this season. Dating two boys and have them find out in the MOST humiliating way possible. Yikes. Being a really sucky friend to Aneesa and starting that rumour about her (inadvertently) and pretending to her. Stalking her mother and being possessive of her. The really awful apology that was pretty self centred, a bit not good. 

 But she really does do her best to improve and I am SO proud of that. She uses her father’s advice and apologizes better to Aneesa, she actually handled the Ben and Aneesa dating WAAAAY better than I’ve seen some people handle things like that. I might’ve blown a fuse if two of my friends had 4 tickle fights and had major PDA sessions when we were trying to do a group project. Like she handled that shit fairly well all things considered. Devi actually gets into the beginnings of delving into her trauma and her temporary paralysis and healing from it. I

 really see how the label ‘crazy’ weighs on her and how she blew up with it and the message of destigmatizing mental illness. (Crazy Aneesa and Crazy Devi)  Her properly bonding with her mother and watching videos of her father and remembering/honouring his memory hit REALLY HARD (since I lost many people in my family recently and that fear of forgetting them has been real). Devi is actually beginning to heal from the loss of her father by strengthening the relationship with her Amma. And the slap from Paati was so so needed, it really gave her a better respect of her mother and fixed the problem I had with Devi mouthing off so much to her Amma. I live to see good maamiyar marumagal relationships. Her relationship with Paxton is really good and it gets developed very logically and having her be scared of being pathetic but in the end she accepted her own self worth and stopped chasing after them which was good. 

Overall Devi really blossomed into her own developing person and I actually like her so much more this season. 

2. Paxton Hall Yoshida

I was honestly, like genuinely sad last season he was like 80% eye candy with not much else going for him. Paxton had so much faith as a character and Ms Kaling has really pulled him into such a better person this season. 

Paxton got hit by a car before swim season, lost his ticket to college and wow, got two timed by a girl he liked all in two episodes. If he was salty about that for more than one season I would’ve completely accepted it. Cause that’s a bad public humiliation. 

Paxton episode really really made me love him as a character (honestly more so than Ben) I think because I heard Paxton’s entire worry and irritation that he was being underestimated and no one really expected him to go to college from a friend of mine not more than a month ago. That shit is real, and it hurted my friends a lot that people were really underestimating them and just seeing them as a dumb athlete who has no hope of college. It’s really nice to see Paxton actually want to go to college and learn Japanese American side with his Oji-chan giving him advice and supporting him. And him bringing his grandfather to speak about the internment camps, that seriously do not get spoken about enough.

Also him putting effort and making a genuine effort to work hard and bring up his grades with Devi and therefore bonding with her was really nice to see. I wouldn’t mind them being endgame but Devi does really work a lot better as his pushy Indian mom/best friend/tutor.  And Devi getting mad at him for him expecting him to hold his hand throughout really hit well. Was it deserved yeah. But Devi also did blow him off after promising him to study so his anger is justified there. I’m just kinda vibing with Paxton like coming up and taking a better interest in school and being a full 3D character. And that one scene where he gives the extra credit presentation and Trent high fives the man. Classic. 

Can I also just say, it’s kinda valid that Paxton didn’t want to date her in public. Is it a dick move...yeah? But he’s within his rights to ask and she’s within her rights to deny. And he didn’t press her once she said no, he went along with it. And what Devi pulled on him is awful, and speaking as someone who’s seen popular kid cliques. Reputation really is important. Like what Devi did made Paxton lose face, if he gets back with Devi he ain’t gonna have any respect left in him. And Paxton was pretty right in deciding to not date her publicly, like even in the end he knows that his reputation is shot for what he did. Do we even know if Paxton has friends that aren’t fixated on his social status? Because becoming a social pariah without having any support of friends is gonna hurt like a bitch. Lord knows how Paxton gonna deal with it. I think Trent might be his only homie after the social downfall he will inevitably face. 

I’m just gonna say, Paxton is my favourite now and I’m really rooting for him. Something I decidedly did not do last season. I’m happy Ms Kaling developed him so much and got me interested. 

3. Ben Gross

Ah. Ben. Ben’s not my faaavouriteee.......like he’s fine. But I don’t love him. I can definitely see him and Devi becoming an almost endgame couple though. Especially with S2 ending. 

Ben is fine and he’s pretty developed, especially with his episode in S1 and it was good he took a backseat this season and let everyone else star. I feel like he’ll come back strong next season though. 

Personally do I ship him with Devi? No. I’ve been in a friendship with the similar competitive dynamic as Ben and Devi. And it was terrible. We loved to argue and we got each other’s super brainy side as Devi puts it. But we pushed each other faar too much and even the small things became arguments and each pthers achievements became jealousy. So yeah....I don’t have too much faith in the dynamic due to personal bias, but I’d love to see how it gets handled. 

Also my brother Ben, PDA is a thing and it is common courtesy to refrain from it. Man’s really going at it with Aneesa half the time. But also the moment where Aneesa sort of choked on the presentation and Ben’s irritation at it gave me BAAAD vibes. It feels like while Devi can match him, they might push each other too far, 

4. Kamala 

I LOVE KAMALA. Girl is an ENTIRE vibe. My sweetheart, love of my life. I could go on. I really like her development as well and the banter between her and Nalini. The part where Nalini practically said she looked like a call girl and she was like ippadi potathaan velaila mariyaatha kidaikum. I legit had to pause, scream in laughter for a good few seconds. 

They had such a good story with her and wanting to fight against the fact that they took her work and didn’t credit her and everyone was telling her to like take it bowing. Prasanth’s advice unfortunately checked out to me, because I’ve been told that all my life. My dad says it a lot and I know he doesn’t say it cause’ he doesn’t believe in me, but he loves me and wants my life to be easier and for me to succeed and his experience is that he’s had to deal with things like this and fighting won’t help. So yeah, what Prasanth said did not rub me the wrong way at all and I agreed with it and I’m fairly disappointed about that. I get that she got nervous and had cold feet about marriage but I do hope she and Prasanth can work this out through communication. Because I really don’t feel like Prasanth is the bad guy here. It’s just a miscommunication. 

So yeah, a LOT of Kamala’s storyline continues to really hit me hard. 

5. Nalini Vishwakumar

Nalini really had so much more screentime to blossom. I love that she has a good relationship with Mohan’s amma. It’s wonderful and I love it. Also I was shocked to see the house in Chennai. Like this house...in Chennai. The Chennai I’m used to and the Chennai they are used to are different Chennai’s. Basically wealth gap is crazy as hell and I was lowkey highkey confused if the actually shot this shit in Chennai. But props to the directors for putting some proper Tamil vibes in there. Like the scene where they kaala thottu kumbudurathu (touch the elder’s feet) before they leave for the US is so real and so vibes. I like that they decided to bring paati back. I was like hoping for it.

Also they really went at developing Nalini’s character as a workaholic mom who doesn’t get her daughter. That’s also a really common thing in Indian households with one working parent so I’m happy they portrayed that. I’m happy Nalini actually has a life outside her family portrayed and is still such a typical mother that it hits HARD. I love Nalini and she really developed as a character dealing with grief from Mohan’s death, the wish to move on with Dr.Jackson but knowing that she isn’t ready yet. 

They gave her character a life and proper working outside Devi and it really has shown to develop her character and impact her relationship with Devi. The advice to “just say yes” works with cousins and younger siblings as well, I’ve heard it before and used it..and it saves so much time. Especially with small children. 

(A memory I have is of my younger cousin going on and on about a princess and a castle and fighting a dragon and the witches and so much fantasy shit and ended with do you wanna come? I just clocked off my CCA’s and I had no energy left to question it so I just went yeah sure. Easiest decision, and 10/10 advice. )

6. Aneesa

I’m not gonna lie. I was skeptical of Aneesa and I didn’t like how Devi saw her in the trailer. But Aneesa reminds me so much of me....and its killing me. 

Also the scene where she charms the hell out of Nalini and paati ma has literally happened to me before. Most of my Indian friends hate it..because I was raised with a lot more traditional manners with my grandparents so me and my siblings all are old fashioned which parents LOVE. And I really saw that Aneesa charming them and Devi also realizing, Damn none of my friends actually treat my family the way they should be treated, perks of having an Indian friend. 

Also the scene where she gets Devi out of trouble is so so real. Because if you have one responsible friend that you parents trust, you could lie the hell to them, get you homie to back you up and it will work. Personal experience. So yeah, Aneesa character resonated with me a lot.

I also like that she wasn’t just a popular 1D Indian girl but she was genuinely cool and actually had proper issues and development where she gets more open to Sherman Oaks and actually kinda properly rebels against Noor, with having Ben as a boyfriend. 

I feel like Aneesa has a lot more potential for growth, especially with the relationship with Ms Noor and Aneesa acting as a foil to Nalini and Devi’s. Also, I feel like Aneesa can grow within her social status at school as well and have Devi maturely handle it. Aneesa I feel will really really challenge Devi’s ability to be mature. 

7. Eleanor and Fabiola’s plotlines

Okay like actually, major props to Ms Kaling man. This show touches so so many teen issues in one goddamn show. Emotionally manipulative relationships. So SO good. A lot of newer age relationships have a much more subtle and dangerous line of abuse that’s hard to find out. Like honestly it took me a while to see it as well and I realized oh fuck. oh fuck...I see it it’s bad. They really got the essence of Eleanor’s flamboyance matching with Malcom? (is it Malcolm..fuck it it’s Malcolm now) his “suaveness” and traditionally charming tendency. It made sense and it’s very realistic how Eleanor got played like a damn fiddle. I also again feel that the make up was faar to quick but I really appreciate that Eleanor got her own storyline with her step-mom and understanding of relationships instead of the show hyperfocusing on just Devi. I respect that a lot.  Petition to get a Eleanor narration episode. 

Fabiola’s storyline also was well taken. It’s an interesting added layer to the queer experience and how queerness can be expected to be performative and but really its all about being more of yourself. The idea that queer people don’t owe nobody anything or have to perform an ideal version of queerness and Fabiola struggling with that kinda hit. The part where they talked about her mother learning to support them and being Cricket? Queen/King. Like being trailblazers for the POC community and the LGBTQ+ community having overlapping struggles. Again, I liked that Fabiola was getting more personal screentime and less of her story revolving around Devi’s. 

8. Everything else

I liked that there was more Tamil being casually thrown around. Like the Kamala vaadi to hold the suitcase down as they zipped it together was funny and relatable. The accents were really interesting because I promise you, I had no clue what they were saying sometimes. Nalini’s dialogues in Tamil were like immensely difficult to understand, and my Tamil is fluent. This isn’t a criticism... I’m fairly certain the difference is to do with the regional difference. American Tamil and Malaysian + rural Tamil slang are going to have huge accent differences so there’s no surprise that I found Nalini’s Tamil hard to understand. 

I’m really really really meh about the Kamala and Manish/Mr Kulkarni thing. I still think she should sort it out with Prasanth maybe but I’m open to seeing where it goes. I might change my mind with it. 

This show like any other show had its highs and lows. But I really really do feel that NHIE season 2 managed to truly figure out what the hell it wants to do and developed into a very strong and very entertaining show in terms of representation and diversity. I’m looking forward to season 3. 

[menalez]

https://www.tumblr.com/youturningintodust/735765266414387200/yes-this-is-rape-culture-done-by-women-well?source=share

invert in op's bio

honestly the invert stuff is whatever to me bc i guess she’s a gnc lesbian so it’s like.. that was what they were called back then. if she feels it’s more succinct and fitting than terms nowadays, that’s fine, her choice. as a term it’s tied to homophobic ideology but i cant assume that’s her point in using it.

i personally don’t like the strap fixation online or in lesbian spaces, because it has made me & many other lesbians feel like weirdos tbh like. we feel like there’s sth wrong with us for NOT liking that but i guess she’s speaking from a diff perspective here, so that’s fine too.

i disagree with framing it as “butch/femme sex” & i dislike the assumption that there being a masc & a feminine woman within the same relationship means we’re having sex a certain way. it’s rly not like that and it sucks when ppl assume that butches can’t possibly enjoy reciprocal sex and only want to give instead of receive any sex acts. or, perhaps less damaging imo, that feminine women only want to receive and not give. it’s just… not the case. how we present to the world doesn’t say much about how we have sex.

the idea that not liking the fixation with strap that can be found in many spaces for women into women is tied to the idea that u need to “use your vagina (penetratively)” is also odd to me. there’s definitely lesbians who don’t enjoy receiving any penetration but enjoy receiving oral for example, or clit stimulation, or some form of rubbing like tribbing or scissoring or w/e else. idk why theres this assumption that it’s either u wear the strap or u get penetrated?? like. it’s not that rare for lesbians to not enjoy or want penetration, actually. maybe its rare to never want any form of penetration, but that’s also not that rare nor is it limited to butches??

but yeah if someone expresses only wanting sex in one way, to guilt trip them in any way or shame them in any way for not wanting to have sex the way YOU approve of is rapey and gross. she’s right about that.

idk why she’s acting like topping being “alien” to lesbians is normal tho…most of us enjoy reciprocal sex, meaning we are mostly vers. if a woman acted like topping is a totally weird thing to do, i reckon most women would not be compatible with her.

again rly hate the equating of female masculinity with being a stone top! she means stone butches, she should say that. it’s more common among butches, but it’s neither exclusive to butches to only want to have the type of sex she describes nor do all butches fit that standard either.

i’m sure what she describes exists but honestly the phenomena i’ve noticed more often is the opposite where people expect butches to not want to be penetrated or not want to have sex acts done onto them… i agree w her ppl who feel entitled to do that to butches are awful tho.

[kodzumie-archived]

can you do some yandere!mikan nsfw hcs?

❝YANDERE! NSFW❞

Synopsis; Yandere Mikan certainly is a freaky one, isn’t she?

Featuring; Mikan Tsumiki x GN! Reader

Warning(s); Yandere themes, nonconsensual somnophilia, drugging, manipulation, blood (taking of blood samples), blood kink, consumption of blood, cum eating, mentions of piss (watersports), masturbation, use of sex toys, mentions of needles, and intentional misuse of medical supplies. (Things do get pretty fucked and gross, please pay attention to the warnings!)

Kodzumie’s Note; Absolutely! Thanks for your request, and I hope you’re doing well. Muah! <3

➤ MIKAN TSUMIKI

⤷ She’s calculating and rapacious; plotting all the ways she can get you to succumb to her. She practically thrives in the vulnerability you’ve unknowingly put upon yourself due to the blind trust you’ve put in her.

⤷ As hopelessly in love as she was, Mikan was aware; she knew that it was far too soon and sudden to formally ask you to engage in such bare intimacy with her. She was also aware of the possibility that you wouldn’t even want to do something so lewd with her.

⤷ But she can’t help herself. So much has been taken from her by those who’ve recognized her weaknesses, her bullies taking anything and everything as she’s unable to do a thing. Isn’t it only right that she’s a little selfish?

⤷ It’s not like you’d mind, of course. You can’t mind something if you don’t even know it’s happening, right?

⤷ Mikan’s desires surge through her with insuppressible fervor. Yet she wouldn’t dare do something so reckless; she wouldn’t dare run the risk of tarnishing your treasured friendship.

⤷ So she covers her tracks. She takes full advantage of your trust within her as a friend and the faith you’ve put within her talents as a nurse. A common tactic she’s picked up is replacing the sugar within your tea—which she orders you to drink to retain good health—with a finely powdered drug; their appearances akin with only a minuscule difference.

⤷ After drinking, you’ll subconsciously succumb to the effects of the drug within fifteen minutes, and then she’ll begin her ministrations; pampering your unconscious body and exploring your most intimate realms.

⤷ A hidden utopia reserved for only the eyes of those you’ve allowed seeing you so bare; so exposed. And, even if you hadn’t known it, Mikan was those eyes. Peering down at you so sickeningly gleefully as she thinks to herself; Your body, sprawled beneath her, was all for her.

⤷ As you’re knocked out, there isn’t an inch of skin she doesn’t smother in sloppy, wet kisses. Her breathing rapid and crazed.

⤷ She savors each moment; relishing in your taste as she sears the memory of every sensation into her core memories. She will never allow herself to forget the blissful oasis of her beloved’s body.

⤷ At first, you’d only assumed that your state of fatigue and extreme exhaustion were the aftermaths of stress. It was understandable; that week had been your finals week.

⤷ And yet, it kept happening; moments where you feel fine, but then you’ll experience powerful waves of nausea before slipping unconscious. So much so, that you asked Mikan about it, of course. She was the Ultimate Nurse, after all.

⤷ Just like you expected, she managed to deduce the possible reasonings behind your experiences. Even going as far as to pinpoint habits that are a common occurrence before you fall into such a vertiginous state.

⤷ “W-Well, typically it’s when you’ve consumed a beverage with sugar.” She deducted, a thoughtful visage as her soft features sharpened with determination. “If I remember right, you’d felt particularly nauseous after you drank tea with sugar that one time.”

⤷ “That can’t be a coincidence though! It happened another time too. Remember when I gave you those sugar cookies? You fell unconscious from those too...” She ponders, her bottom lip jutting out in thought. Your eyes widen as the dots connect internally. That is true, all the instances had been induced as you’d consumed anything with sugar.

⤷ “If you’d like—“ Mikan’s voice cuts out as she nervously squirms under your curious gaze, her hesitant nature bringing a smile to your lips. “Take your time.” You assure her, placing your hand over hers to, hopefully, calm her nerves. If only you knew what you did to her and her poor little heart.

⤷ “W-Well I just thought that if I took some blood samples, I-I could confirm my suspicions!” She exclaims, cheeks flushed as her gaze remained fixated on your hand atop her own.

⤷ Your eyes widen once more as they glimmer with surprise and appreciation. “Would you really do that for me?!” She’s taken aback by your exclamation, accidentally tearing her hand from yours as she falls backs.

⤷ But she’s quick to recover, smile faltering at the lost connection of your hand with hers. “Of course!” She confesses.

⤷ And that’s how it began, her odd secondary obsession. Behind you, of course.

⤷ You hadn’t given her suggestions much thought other than that you trust Mikan, and what she was doing was simply what’s best for you. This was her talent, her field. If you couldn’t trust her with what she did best, who could you possibly trust?

⤷ So she began taking samples of your blood. At first, it was only a weekly thing. Once a week, she’d draw out enough blood to fill a miniature capsule and examine it to determine the underlying causes for your sudden fits of falling unconscious. Though she was more than aware of the true reason.

⤷ For each blood sample she took, she returned to you with the discovery that the amount of glucose within your blood was alarmingly high, and that her hypothesis was, in fact, correct.

⤷ But that’s all lies. Lies, lies, lies that you oh-so-helplessly believe. Mikan’s the nurse, she knows best. Mikan knows best, Mikan knows best, Mikan knows best!

⤷ Regardless, you believed her. And you provided her the weekly blood samples as she instructed. Though it was a bit tedious to have the pricking of a needle within your arm so often, it was better than randomly passing out at the most unfortunate of times.

⤷ Once she collected the capsules, she informed you that she’d take them back to her house where she can perform more thorough research. Since all of her equipment is there, of course!

⤷ You don’t question it. Not even as you wonder what she’d done with the capsules after weeks of no word of them. Surely she threw them away. You shouldn’t question her, you trust her, after all!

⤷ If only you’d questioned her. If only you’d taken the second to doubt her; debunk your trust in her. Perhaps then you’d have realized the red flags within everything.

⤷ Within the confines of her bedroom, Mikan’s moans are barely concealed as she unscrews the capsule filled with the familiar crimson liquid; your blood.

⤷ Her mind fuzzy with idea of her possessing such a fluid. Your fluid, of all things. Her obsession fueled further as she coats her fingers in the viscous liquid. It was still warm, still so fresh from within you. The thought of how this blood was once within your body sends jolts of depraved pleasure down her spine.

⤷ She lathers the blood around her fingers, savoring the sensation. A shaky sigh of ecstasy escaping her lips as she stutters out a moan. Everything was so overwhelming at that moment. She was in disbelief, yet oh-so alarmingly aware. This was your blood. This was your blood.

⤷ “Ha...Aha!” A delirious moan escaping her lips as she swirls her blood-coated fingers over her clit. The stimulation paired with the searing reminder that it was your blood beginning to smear over her clit instantly sent tremors through her legs.

⤷ The pleasure felt so intense; so very intense. Even as she has pumps two fingers into her pussy, stretching herself out as your blood coats her walls, it all felt so intense. Almost unbearable. The feeling of your blood within her driving her to the brink of insanity as if she hadn’t already plunged into the abyss of madness.

⤷ Yet even as her fingers continued to plunge into her sopping cunt—her slick blending with your blood—she couldn’t help but yearn for more. She wanted to have your blood coat her walls entirely. And her petite fingers simply wouldn’t do.

⤷ Thankfully, she has just the thing. Within her hands she cradles a dildo, having already removed her two digits from her cunt as she eagerly drags her fist down the girth of the toy. It’s lengthy. Good.

⤷ She grabs the previously discarded capsule which still witheld blood. Perfect; everything was perfect.

⤷ Mikan tilted the small bottle, drizzling the viscous crimson fluid as it glazed over the dildo, painting its pink exterior in a contrasting red.

⤷ As the bottle emptied, the last of your blood poured onto the toy, an eerie giggle escaped Mikan’s lips. Her eyes swirling with psychotic euphoria as she pumped the blood upon the length of the dildo. Successfully smearing the blood all over the toy, not a trace left untouched.

⤷ Her breathing turned erratic. Huffs of air forced from her lungs as she sunk onto the blood-coated toy. It stung; the stretch searing through her senses as she gasped, squiriming in discomfort. And yet, it felt so damn good.

⤷ Your blood was inside her, your blood was inside her, your blood was inside her, your blood was inside her, your blood was inside her—

⤷ The idea driving her mad as she bounced, squelching air bubbles caused by the drool of her pussy mixed with the blood, arousal poisoning the air as she released an unsettling laugh, moaning mid-way through.

⤷ This was it. This was true happiness! To be filled with your fluids, no matter what they made be. Stuffing her pussy full of you and anything reminescent of you. This was true ecstasy.

⤷ The blood upon the tip of the dildo nuzzling against her cervix—painfully—yet smearing your blood deep within her.

⤷ It’s painful. Her thighs ache as she bounces, yet she craves the stimulation; the pleasure. It’s so overwhelming she trembles, shaking until she’s attempting to squirm and retreat from the toy as her orgasm begins to bubble within her stomach, ready to boil over.

⤷ And so, the string snaps; her climax washing over her with violent shudders and breathless sobs. Her cum oozing around the base of the dildo as the length remains snuggled within her clenching pussy.

⤷ Mikan breathes heavily, shifting her weight to ease her knees as she moans. Every movement forced a jolt down her spine, her cunt throbbing with sensitivity.

⤷ Her fingers delicately brush over her stretched slit, toy still buried within her as she dabs her digit in the mess, coating her fingers in her cum mixed with your blood.

⤷ It was a rosy hue; the translucent, milky white of her orgasm and your deep vermillion blood mixed together. The dew an embodiment of the connection you and her shared; your shared fluids mixed into an addictive concoction.

⤷ Mikan brings her fingers to her lips, sucking on the mixture as she licks her digits clean. It tastes so good; it tastes like love. It tastes precisely like the bond you two shared, a bittersweet cocktail.

⤷ And as she layed spewing your combined mixture of love—an unknowing commitment and the blossoming of yet another depraved addiction—she couldn’t help but grin. She couldn’t wait for how many more times she’d pleasure herself with your fluids.

⤷ What more could she take from you? What more could she use to satisfy her needs, yet keeping a piece of you with her? She wanted more. She needed more. But she knew better than to be impatient.

⤷ One day, you’ll willingly engage in such ludicrous acts with her. One day, you’ll provide her with whichever fluid she selects; blood, cum, spit. Hell, she’d even accept your piss. She just wanted more of you, you, you!

⤷ She’ll wait. She’d wait a millenial for you; lifetimes. If it’s for you, she’ll do anything and everything. But for now, she’ll settle on waiting; waiting as your blood coats the valleys of her pussy’s walls. If she can’t get you, she’ll get the next best thing.

[perhapsthanatos]

06:01 am with sungchan ♡

nct's sungchan x fem!reader (ok do u guys know that one vine where its in a party & a girl is vaping & a dude says “wow”? yeah, thats where i got my inspo from)

alternate title: after the afterparty

genre: fluff. pinning. non idol au. party!au (is that a thing?).

word count: 1250~

playlist: melodrama (the whole album) by lorde.

warnings: mentions of some of the nct dream members as well as some mentions of the loona members (not really a warning though). this is set before corona was a thing (pls dont do this now). it is set in a house party (with tension). mentions of drugs (weed), alcohol & smoking. mild swearing. making out perhaps? lower case intended.

a/n: this has been on my mind for awhile now & im really excited to put this out there! it also has more tension compared to the other works so yay :)) i also just wanna take a moment to thank the lovely @nct99 for helping me out with this plot & giving some prompts & ideas too?? :(( she is such a sweetheart & pls she is so talented too ugh im so glad we r mutuals & fellow lorde stans :(( give her love rn or else i will eat ur shower curtains (& nae i hope it was worth the wait! i wish i added more references tho lmaoo)

another graceless night and another house party. this time, it was chenle’s birthday. he is a friend of yours, known for having a huge mansion and known for throwing the best parties regardless of the occasion. come to think of it though, it could easily be the 7th one this week and it’s barely wednesday. the evening passes fast as golden rays already start to gently peek through the thin curtains of the tall windows near the living room, as bodies of wasters are sprawled all over the house.

you lean back on the couch further, a curtain of haze taking up your vision as you inhaled another hit of the fresh blunt. even with the sun rising, you still make most of what you can get before everyone (and everything) starts leaving. you never were a party person until your friends dragged you into it. since that day you found it to be a fun way to get rid of your problems and worries (even if it was just for a few hours). partying (as gross as it sounds) became a routine, even becoming its own cycle. you come, you leave and you have everything in between be a complete blur, maybe even staying completely jaded until the daylight returns. some nights it feels good to kiss and keep busy rather than face the constant harsh reality.

you turn your head to see sungchan, the back of his head resting on the top of the couch right next to you. his leather jacket rubbing against your bare arm. his eyes are closed showing off his long lashes and his pink lips are chapped and parted. he looks seraphic in this light.

to be honest, you didn’t know much about sungchan. all you knew was that he’s the new kid who started getting close with jisung barely a month ago. that led jisung to introduce him to the group and him getting welcomed in with open arms by everyone, except you. it’s not that you hate him or have anything against him, if anything he seems like the most charming people out there. you just have trouble opening up to new people especially when you’re already so comfortable with the others (which he could kind of guess already). but since he joined, he was also dragged into the party scene and often played the role as the designated driver and part-time babysitter (a role that he takes seriously along with jeno). it isn’t an uncommon occurrence for him to be seen wrestling the bottle of gin away from hyejoo, strapping in renjun’s seat belt for him, cleaning up yerim’s vomit or carrying an unconscious donghyuck over his shoulder. come to think of it, he fits in just fine. you have often found yourself near him during parties. just kicking back and sitting in a comfortable silence with you drinking and smoking from time to time. he is the one that notices when you’ve had enough and wanted to leave. maybe you’re more alike than you think?

“feeling good?” he asks, smelling the fresh smoke. he turns his head to you and opens one of his eyes.

you only nod and sigh, turning your head back to the ceiling. waves of calmness hit your head, forcing every burden out. you were about to offer him a hit but you remembered that he would only reject it. but you take another for yourself and he can only stare, completely enamored. we watches the smoke escape your lips in slow.

the thing is, he always had some sort of thing for you. a crush? a person he found cool and therefore admired? a person who he found so damn gorgeous all the time? god knows. all he knew was that there was something in you that was so addictive. on the nights where he’d stay sober, he’d watch you sit by his side, quietly drinking up your little movements and habits. even if he hates the taste of alcohol or the smell of gasoline, he loved how your teeth would close around the liquor-wet lime slices that would sit on the side of your cup and how your smoke always finds a way to leave him stained. he would constantly be falling into this fixation of you. you are etched into his mind as the embodiment of perfection even if you have multiple flaws just like he does. his mind constantly lays restless during the most ungodly hours while all of his dreams show you and him in different dimensions. it hurts him to violently like you like this but how can he not resist when the heartache came from you?

“sungchan,” you quietly call out, turning your head back to him, only to see him already staring.

“hm?” he takes one of your hands, in case you wanted to get up and couldn’t walk.

“may i try something?” you ask him, curiously with your hooded eyes barely holding on to consciousness.

“what is it?” he sits up, trying to help.

you gently push him back into the couch and straddle his hips. his eyes slightly widen and his cheeks turn a rosy red.

“ah, y/n, you’re fucking high.” he warns, stroking your hair and leaning further back.

you only giggle. your finger lifts his chin up, making him look directly at you. his shaky eyes are too irresistible.

“tell me when you wanna stop.”

you take the blunt, inhaling deeply. he continues to hold you, admiring the view while he’s at it.

you then gently pulled him closer by the neck (quite slowly incase he wanted to oppose) to leave an open-mouthed kiss on his plum lips to transfer the smoke into his mouth. he does not fight the feeling, how can he when your lips are the softest thing he has ever felt? the smoke began to seep through as he started to move his lips, eliciting a groan from you. is this what euphoria feels like? his grip on your waist tightens as your arms wrap around his neck, prompting him to go further.

sungchan, almost breathless pulls on your bottom lip, bruising them to then pull away to work at your neck, licking and leaving kisses all over. butterflies filled your stomach for the first time in awhile. you never felt this way towards another person in too long. is it love or desperation? you watch the smoke flow away so gracefully around your bodies, despite what just happened. sungchan pulls away and looks at you, his eyes holding the world. you pray that you didn’t frighten him away.

“you do not know how long i’ve been wanting to do that,” he whispers, his forehead against yours. you smile in return, pulling away to place a small kiss on his jaw which clenches from the sudden contact. you rest your head on his shoulder, closing your eyes as his head rests on yours and his cold hands trace patterns against the skin of your back.

“know i think you’re fucking awesome, right?” you hum, making him smile like an idiot.

“hm, no. but i think you should know that i think you’re really fucking awesome, right?” he says holding you tighter and gently swaying from side to side.

“you wanna leave here and get some mcdonalds or something?”

“ooo, what ever happened to the babysitter and designated driver, hm? so what, you plan to leave them here hungover and defenseless?”

“shut up, it’s already dawn. they can take an uber. i just wanna spend time with you right now.”

“alright.”

© perhapsthanatos (efa)