#she rides them like horsies too

[wake-up-and-face-the-sun]

Betelgeuse’s creations are all straight analogue horror

[yourlocalghoulette]

Part One ~ Grand Opening

Series masterlist~ Main masterlist~ Meet the horsies~

w/c- 3k

warnings- eventual smut so MDNI, this chapter is pretty much fluff, language, reader has riding trauma but not explained in detail (yet), Joel is a softie for horses and Sarah, he's so sweet he'll make your teeth ache!

lmk if you want to be on the taglist!

horses used to be a favorite past time.

a place in your life where you could feel alive, feel comforted, feel free. an escape from reality. home.

happiness doesn't last forever, and you found that out quick. being the best in your hunter/jumper team didn't mean you had it good. hell, it made it worse. more stress, more demanding work, more pressure from trainers to hold up the team and win the gold medals. but one thing led to another, and after a few mentally and physically abusive trainers and a bad fall, you decided to quit.

quit the one thing that made you happy.

sometimes you wish you could go back in time, to when you were five and sat on a pony for the first time at the fair. your mom always smiled at the memory, saying she wished she could see that light in your eyes once more.

living in Austin, Texas, the land of cowboys, wasn't exactly helpful. horses were everywhere, from hunter barns to trail riding stables. although horses are practically shoved in your face in Texas, you've done pretty well with staying away from them. they bring back too many unpleasant memories.

little did you know that a tiny new stable across town would change your life forever.

Joel Miller adores horses. his life, heart, and soul, or at least some of it.

his daughter Sarah takes up most of his everything. she's his sun, moon, stars, and his rock ever since he woke up in an empty bed eleven years ago. well, the horses too. sometimes the only time he would feel grounded was when he was mounted up in the saddle. it's a strange comfort, knowing that you can trust the 1,000 pound animal with your life. most of the time, of course. he's had his fair share of accidents, as would anyone that's associated with horses.

after years of working double shifts for a contracting company with his brother Tommy, he finally saved enough money up to build his own riding barn.

he doesn't want to be like the showy, expensive barns that are found all over Austin, Texas. he wanted his barn to be a safe house, an escape from reality for whoever walked into his barn. he had grown up in the dressage barn his parents owned, and the toxicity among the members was palpable. everything was a competition.

Joel didn't like that at all. he thinks horses should be a man's best friend, not a ticket to a gold medal. which is why he is opening the new stable. he knows it won't compete with the larger barns around it but at least it will be a home to the few people that come to find it.

your mission to stay away from horses is hijacked when you get a call from your best friend, Sōl, while you're driving home from the coffee shop you work at.

"hey, girlie pop!" you answer the phone, jumping as her voice comes through the car speakers loudly.

"hey, babes!" you hear her cheery voice on the other side of the phone.

"Jesus, Sōl. you're connected to AirPlay and about made me cause an accident," you laugh, turning the car volume down. "what's up?"

"ok, you're not gonna like this," she starts out slowly.

"girl, just tell me," you sigh knowingly, hearing her attempted compelling tone of voice.

"I know you don't really want to be around horses anymore butttt there's a new barn opening in Leander and the grand opening sounds super fun. horse rides, food, and games. you wanna come with me?" she questions slyly, using her sweetest voice to convince you.

you let out a long sigh, running a hand over your face as you stop at a red light. "I don't know, babe. i...I haven't been around horses since...since like high school. I don't know if I'm ready for it."

"come on girl, it's gonna be a good time! and it's not like the other barns you rode at, or like Cedar Ridge." Sōl rides for Cedar Ridge, a large jumper barn outside of Austin, and is one of the best on the team. "listen. I'll send you the website and you can look at it, then decide. okay?" you can hear Sōl's grin through the speakers.

"fine. but it's only a maybe, okay, babe?" you let out an exasperated breath.

once you're back home and settled on the couch in your apartment with a bag of cheddar popcorn, you open the link Sōl texted you and scroll the website. the description catches your eye and you click on the read more button.

Sarah's Stables is a small, family-owned barn located just outside of Austin. our goal is to make people comfortable around horses and to bond with these amazing creatures. we aren't about competitions and gold metals at Sarah's Stables. we believe horses should be a second home, a place to rest your head. we also believe that the privilege of being around horses should be available to everyone, so we have affordable prices and volunteer-to-ride programs as well. come to our grand opening on July 26th!

below the paragraph is a picture of the owner, Joel with his daughter Sarah. you look closer to see that he is undeniably handsome. his dark brown eyes crinkled at the corners as he smiles widely in the photo. brown curls frame his forehead, streaked with a few silver hairs. his jawline is specked with salt-and-pepper scruff. his daughter is beautiful as well, with light brown skin and tight curly hair. you can see the resemblance in their eyes.

you sigh deeply. it doesn't look like the barns you're used to. it looks more relaxed, more fun. and it was only a small plus that the owner is easy on the eyes.

you give in and call Sōl. "i read the website. I'm in," you grin.

who knows, maybe it'll be good for you to see horses again.

July 26th dawns bright and early for Joel. he wakes up with a start to the sound of Sarah knocking on his door.

"Alarm!" she calls into his room.

"shit," he mutters, hitting the top of the beeping alarm with his palm. when he remembers what day it is, his hands turn clammy with nervousness. he glances at the alarm clock. 5:40; he has twenty minutes before he has to go to the barn to feed the horses. he rolls out of bed with a grunt, stretching his limbs. he throws on a worn t-shirt and a pair of jeans and walks downstairs.

he finds Sarah in the kitchen, scrambling eggs over the stove. "mornin', kiddo," he grunts, ruffling her hair as a small smile plays on his lips. "how'd you sleep?"

"i didn't," Sarah grins. "i was too excited and scared. scare-cited... scexcited...?"

"scare-cited sounds right to me," he chuckles, pouring coffee into a red mug.

"i was gonna make pancakes for the big day but you forgot to pick up mix. you're gonna have to settle for scrambled eggs," Sarah hands him a plate, grinning knowingly.

"Was I....I was. sorry, kiddo. I'll pick some up later. I've been a bit stressed lately, obviously." Joel sits down at the table and starts quickly eating the eggs. he picks something out of the eggs and holds it up to Sarah. "shell," he says gruffly.

Sarah grins widely with a mouthful of eggs. "calcium."

"lovely," Joel rolls his eyes. "well, i best be off to feed the horses. Uncle Tommy will be by in a few hours to pick you up. love you, kiddo." he plants a soft kiss on the top of her head before discarding his plate into the sink. he grabs his wallet and phone before sliding on his black Ariat boots.

"love you too, dad. good luck," Sarah sticks her tongue out as he slings his backpack over his shoulder.

the short drive to the barn is quiet, with Long, Long, Time by Linda Ronstadt crackling through the old truck radio. Joel pulls into the barn driveway just as the Texas sunshine starts peeking through the darkness, a sight he'll never get tired of. he can already hear the six horses banging against their stall doors from outside, impatient for their morning grain.

he fishes the door key out of his back pocket and opens the door. he's met with a chorus of snorts and nickers as the hungry horses wait impatiently for their grain.

"mornin', ya little glue sticks. you gonna behave well today?" he grins playfully, stopping at Whiskey's stall, the one-eyed, cinnamon-colored Tennessee Walker gelding. he pets the front of Whiskey's face gently, tracing the long white blaze that splits down his face. "guess what, little man? you get to give pony rides," Joel smiles, his eyes soft and full of admiration for this horse. he know Whiskey loves the kids. he's the sweetest horse, always giving you kisses and loving nudges. though he is missing one eye, his other is very expressive.

Joel parts with his favorite horse to go make feeds, scooping a variety of different grains and supplements into the six color-coded buckets.

once the feed is distributed and the horses are happily munching on their food, Joel gets to work. he sweeps the stall aisles clean of hay and manure, then shovels it into a wheelbarrow. while he's dumping it outside, he sees his younger brother Tommy's truck pulling into the driveway. When Tommy and Sarah come inside, Tommy grins, giving his brother a firm hug.

"Ain't this a sight for sore eyes," he whistles lowly. "it's okay big bro. we'll help you get ready."

Joel rolls his eyes. "fuck you."

"da-ad," Sarah grins. "that's a quarter in the swear jar!"

"you're right, kiddo, sorry," Joel mutters, shaking his head.

"alright, big bro, we gotta get to work," Tommy nudges Joel in the shoulder.

back at your apartment, you're awoken by the sun peeking through your floral-patterned curtains. you groan, shielding the light from your eyes with the back of your hand. you pick up your phone, glancing at the time. 10:23. shit. 40 minutes to get ready. a text notification pops up on your phone from Sōl 😜.

Sōl😜~ morning bb! u ready for today?? im picking you up at 11!

morning girlie! just woke up lol. I'll b ready for u! ~you

you turn on your morning playlist and climb out of bed and into the bathroom, where you dance to Take On Me by A-ha while brushing your teeth. you get dressed into faded blue bell bottoms and a yellow tank top with white flowers. you even pull out your blue cowboy boots that you'd stored away in your closet for so many years. you leave your hair down, knowing you'll probably have to wear a riding helmet later.

it's 11:05 when Sōl knocks on your door, and you answer it quickly. She squeals excitedly, pulling you in for a hug.

"babes, you look so goddamn cute! maybe there'll be some hot cowboy at this here grand opening," she smirks.

"as do you, babe! I know one's gonna be there for sure," you grin as you walk out with Sōl and into her car. "did you see the picture of the owner? whoo-ee."

Sōl nudges your shoulder across the center console. "told ya. this was meant to be."

the car ride is full of laughter, Disney songs, and off-key singing, and you finally pull up to the stables along with a few other cars. the barn is a quaint, white wooden structure with periwinkle blue trim around the open barn door and windows. yellow and white flowers hang from around the overhang over the entrance, where a big banner is posted that reads Sarah's Stables in curly cursive handwriting.

"this place is so cute! this Joel guy sure knows how to decorate," Sōl says approvingly, admiring the small concrete horse figurines standing guard outside the door.

you walk into the clean, homey barn to see Joel Miller in the flesh. God, he's even more handsome than he was in the picture.

"welcome in, darlin'!" Joel smiles warmly, shaking your hand. "the name's Joel. so glad to meet you."

you smile widely as you tell him his name. "I'm excited to be here. this place is gorgeous."

"why, thank you, darlin'," Joel grins proudly. he tries to push the thought of how pretty he thinks you are away. "do you ride?"

you bite your lip for a second before nodding. "used to. haven't really been around horses since high school."

"how come?" his dark brown eyes soften, studying your face. Sōl has ran off to see the horses at this point.

"I rode at a few hunter jumper barns on a high level," you explain. "you....probably know how those trainers can be. I didn't exactly want to go back after how they treated me."

Joel nods understandingly. "I know exactly how it is. my parents owned a dressage barn for my whole childhood. everyone's always after everyone's ass and trying to be better than the other and such. it wasn't a healthy environment for me as a kid." "dressage, huh? you seem more like a cowboy to me, Joel," you smile infectiously. "it's the accent, believe me. don't let it fool ya." he chuckles. "oh, there's some new guests. I gotta go introduce myself. there's pony rides, games and drinks outside through that door."

"thanks," you stare after him as he walks away, admiring the way his broad shoulders fill out the sleeves of his navy blue t-shirt. you walk out the door Joel had directed you to, immediately spotting Sōl who is already talking up a storm with a tall, younger blonde man wearing a cowboy hat. you grab a sparkling raspberry lemonade can from the cooler and walk over to them.

"hey, girlie! bout time you made it out here," Sōl grins. "this is Chase. He rides at Cedar Ridge on my team."

he tips his hat to you as you politely tell him your name. you gently nudge Sōl's shoulder. "wanna go look around?"

"sure. see you later, cowboy," Sōl flashes a wink towards Chase, who blushes slightly.

you and Sōl walk the barn aisles, admiring the cleanliness of it. you inhale the mixture of horse, hay, and manure, an odd smell you always found oddly comforting. you take in your surroundings, admiring how beautiful the simplistic decorations are. you peek in the tack room, which is unsurprisingly clean and organized. each intricately stitched saddle sits on its own stand, polished to perfection.

"this place feels...different," you say thoughtfully, peeking into a stall and smiling at the sight of a little chestnut shetland pony.

"different how? awww, look at this cutie." she scrunches her nose up at the shetland, giving his muzzle a little boop.

"I don't know. it feels comforting....like home." you stroll down to the next stall to find a tall black percheron. the small handwritten sign on his stall reads that he's an 18 year old gelding named Amadeus, and he was rescued along with the Shetland from an animal hoarder.

"I see what you mean. feels a lot less fancy and...sterilized than the other barns we've ridden at."

"and the trainer is nicer," you say quietly, tracing the white star on Amadeus's forehead. Sōl raises a knowing eyebrow.

"is someone developing a crush?"

you shoot her a pointed look. "no....no. it's just... refreshing for it to feel like the owner actually cares."

"someone's developing a crush?"

your eyes widen as you hear Joel's voice behind you and you spin around to face him, a flustered expression on your face. "no one," you grin. "just Sōl being a bit of a menace." you try to laugh it off.

Joel smirks and looks over at Sōl who just shrugs innocently. "anyways, I wanted to talk to you before more people come. I'm in dire need of some extra help, having the barn just startin' up and such. you seem to know your stuff, and-" he gestures to Amadeus's calm expression as you pet him. "the horses seem to be relaxed around you."

you purse your lips, taking a deep breath. are you really ready for this? after so long not being around horses....no. you push that thought out of your mind. this place feels good. feels natural.

"of course. i...this opportunity will be good for me. I need to gain confidence around horses again." Joel's eyes crinkle as he smiles, obviously relieved.

"thank you so much, darlin'. you're truly a blessin'. I'll pay you of course. looking forward to see you around."

[kiame-sama]

What does Baby Spider think of each member of the troupe, including Chrollo?

I also find it hilarious that Baby Spider has the upper hand for Little Spider's attention, compared to Chrollo.

Little Spider:

- Baby Spider adores their Mama more than any member of the troupe. They are a Mama's kid and loves how sweet their Mama is to them. If they have a choice of who they want to be with, it is their Mama. Baby Spider knows their Mama will always coo over and protect them and they adore the attention and affection their Mama gives them. Baby Spider loves their Mama more than anyone else and knows Mama loves them too.

Chrollo:

- There is something wrong with Papa and he is very strange, but not entirely sure why yet. Confused as to why Papa doesn't spend half as much time with them as he insists on spending with Mama. Starting to wonder if Papa even actually loves them based off of how he acts with mama and even gets possessive of Mama's time and attention. Baby Spider wants Papa to pay attention to them but that only happens when they are with Mama, so they intentionally monopolize Mama's time.

Pakunoda:

- Pakunoda is the favorite auntie because she has the most even temper with Baby Spider. Paku is the one who is most likely to be taking care of Baby Spider when Chrollo gets jealous and possesive. The main one who takes interest in Baby Spider's general education.

Machi:

- Nurse Auntie! If Baby Spider ever gets an owie, nurse auntie is the one to patch them up and make sure they are okay. Nurse Auntie acts like she is annoyed but the Baby Spider knows she actually cares a lot. She is actually happy to teach Baby Spider how to sew up injuries and how to treat them.

Shizuku:

- Forgetful Auntie. Baby Spider knows to stay around forgetful Auntie because she may forget Baby Spider should be with her and leave them places. She is no longer allowed to take Baby Spider to a playground or park unless one of the other spiders goes with them. She is most likely to play with Baby Spider at the playground.

Uvogin:

- Favorite Uncle. Nothing is more amusing than to ride around on Uvo's shoulders and play wrestle. Uvo is very good at tossing and catching Baby Spider even though it greatly distresses Little Spider to see the baby being thrown like a basketball. No civilian will try and mess with Uvo or the Baby Spider while they are together.

Nobunaga:

- Samurai Uncle. To Baby Spider, Nobunaga looks and acts like a samurai, so that means he must be a samurai. Baby Spider thinks he is fascinating to hang out with. Nobunaga is fond of the Baby Spider and entertains the Samurai idea.

Franklin:

- Horsie Uncle. Franklin will carry Baby Spider around in that pocket on the front of his overalls and is usually the one left to guard Baby Spider if someone ever tries to attack the troupe. Franklin is the safest one for the Baby Spider to be with whenever danger is near and can't be with Little Spider.

Kortopi:

- Uncle It. Baby Spider watched a lot of Adam's Family when Shalnark had to babysit. Baby Spider used to be afraid of Kortopi until seeing Cousin It and immediately made the connection of Kortopi being Uncle It. Kortopi is thrilled the Baby Spider is no longer frightened of him.

Bonolenov:

- Baby Spider actually likes playing pretend with Bonolenov and is more comfortable with him when his bandages are off. At first Bonolenov scared Baby Spider until the first time they saw him without the bandages as a newborn infant and showed no fear.

Feitan:

- Angry Uncle. The Baby Spider is intimidated by Feitan but knows that if they need anything he is the one to ask. Feitan isn't usually the one to watch Baby Spider because Feitan has a habit of being gruff and short tempered. He will watch Baby Spider if he needs to, but he will not be playing games with the Baby Spider.

Phinks:

- Nice Uncle. Phinks tries and somewhat succeeds at buying Baby Spider's love. Baby Spider is as emotionally manipulative as their Papa and understands Phinks is the one the buys what they want. The apple doesn't rot far from the tree and even as a toddler, Baby Spider knows how to get what they want and manipulate others to get it.

Shalnark:

- Techie Uncle. Shal will be the one who entertains Baby Spider most of the time. Any little gadget Shal gets his hands on will also be played with by Baby Spider. Shal also lets Baby Spider control the human puppets and thinks it is hillarious.

[insipid-drivel]

Tack And Upkeep: The Equine Influencer's Daily Routine

This is a continuation of my post, "Horses: Since There Seems To Be A Knowledge Gap". The first post I'm pretty satisfied addressed general horsie behavior and what's genuinely realistic in portraying horses, riding, and the relationships between horses and their riders that most people just plain don't know because you only learn it by working with them. The overall reception to the first post has been sincerely touching and inspiring from those of you who have shared and tagged or commented, so let's expand your knowledge some more! In this post, I'll be addressing the specific routines horses go through on a daily basis to be happy and healthy, and covering the different names and uses of tack.

Warning: This Is Going To Be A Very Long Post And So I've Placed A Readmore Below

Phase One: The Asscrack of Dawn

Horses are extremely high-maintenance and demanding animals when it comes to their routine upkeep. They're highly routine-focused, and will literally scream at the tops of their lungs if you're late in getting to the barn. If you think your cat is strict with their daily routines? It's because they learned it from horses, I'm 99% sure. My mom was once late as a teenager to getting to her horse and feeding him breakfast. He responded by picking the latch on his stall door, escaping from his paddock, and nosing his way past her bedroom window to whinny at her asleep in bed so she would get up and feed him. Like "I know where your stall is, too!"

Horses usually want to start the day in the pre-dawn hours. This is why stable hands and squires are essential throughout history. We adorn our eye crusties from rolling out of bed around 4am with oat dust as we head to the barn and first start with breakfast while you're able to stay in bed and sleep in time to get to work without being so sleep-deprived you walk into your car door instead of getting inside it.

So, what do horses like to eat anyway?

-Hay: The generic Wheaties of the horse world. Hay is a mix of dried grasses and healthy herbs meant for general munching and snacking on when the horse is in their stall or otherwise has no access to a pasture for grazing. They tend to be pretty "meh, okay" on being presented with hay, which we stable hands deliver in wheelbarrows and go from stall to stall filling each horse's individual feed bucket/trough. Hay and straw are not the same. Straw isn't very edible for livestock, and is almost exclusively used for insulation and bedding instead of food.

-Alfalfa, aka Clover flakes:

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Alfalfa flakes, or clover flakes as I'm used to saying, are a sweet-smelling, green bale of lightly dried and compressed alfalfa and clover. The bale itself can be broken up into flat, square "flakes" that we often present to horses like treats. The flakes can either be placed on the ground in the stall (not recommended; they poo and pee there), or in a loose net, open-topped grid, or some other form of mounted feeder they can comfortably snack on. The flakes themselves smell very sweet, herbal smell that was always my favorite when I was a stable hand.

-Oats: Oats are kind of the treat of treats for horses, and are carefully measured and controlled when it comes to portioning. Horses tend to love oats so much that, if allowed to, they will literally eat until their stomachs rupture and die. Every barn and every horse has different dietary needs, such as ratios for oats vs. alfalfa vs. hay in order to keep them healthy.

-Molasses: Horses absolutely love sugar, but molasses in particular is something they go crazy for. When I was learning to barrel race and was establishing my working relationship with my Quarterhorse, Chip, my mom would help me out by making homemade horse treats consisting of rolled oats, molasses, and chopped up bits of apple that I'd slip to him when it was time for me to bring him his breakfast.

-Apples: The stereotype is true that horses adore apples, carrots, and other safe-to-eat fruits and veggies. But again, we treat these like actual treats, since they wouldn't be something a horse could safely eat in large quantities without developing stomach and intestinal problems.

-Thistles:

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Horses go absolutely hogwild for thistles like the ones that grow in Scotland, Ireland, England, and Wales. They're a common sight along a lot of roads in the US nowadays, too, and while they're spiky as hell to us, horses are kinda like giraffes in that they have very tough mouth and tongue tissues designed to be tough against thorny and rigid vegetation. If you happen to be a fan of artichokes (also thistles), you may understand why horses get so excited to eat the little purple flowering ones! They're just yummy to 'em.

A very good rule of thumb to follow when it comes to writing up a rough feeding routine for your OC's horse, think of the natural ratios of food a wild horse would find. They would mostly eat grasses, with limited access to grains and fruits, and alfalfa/clover only tends to grow in large patches compared to the way grass likes to spread everywhere, so even the alfalfa would be lower on the list of most-eaten foods for a horse. As for stuff like thistles; those are treats even among horses. Stable hands will put up with a lot of literal horseshit, but the horses can forage for thistles themselves.

Phase Two: Bathtime

Now, routines can vary, but in my experience, the horses tend to be more relaxed and cooperative for cleanup time after they've been given breakfast, but every owner runs their barn differently.

The first thing we do is put a halter on. This is a halter:

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The difference between a halter and a bridle is a bit like the difference between a sports bra and a steel-boned corset: One you can stand to sleep in if you have to, while the other is there for good looks and tight control. Most horses don't mind wearing a halter 24/7, while others are crafty enough to figure out how to rub their heads against a tree/fence/stable door to slip their halter off.

It is possible to ride with a halter instead of a bridle, but you basically have to be willing to trust the horse with your life/are learning to ride bareback (although even bareback riders will often still use a halter or bridle for their own safety, and to control the horse when they're not riding it). 99% of the time, the halter is just there to help us stable hands guide and direct the horse to where we need them to be, with the rings on the halter used for clipping things like ropes to them to control the horse's head:

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The above image is a good idea of how we "control" the horse's head. In the barns I worked at, we usually took the horses to a hitching spot just outside of the tack room to keep them warm inside while we prepped them for the day.

Once the horse is comfortable and properly controlled in place, it's first time to "swamp out" the stall behind them! A horse's stall only stays clean when the horse isn't in it, and so every time you're preparing to take the horse out or put them in their stall, it's essential to clean the stall first. This means shoveling poo and soiled straw and hosing down the stall floor (most modern barns these days keep heavy rubber mats on the stall floors to keep the horses warmer and more comfortable in general), distributing fresh straw for them to sleep in, refilling water buckets, and topping off hay feeders. Once all that's done, we turn our attention to the horse.

Bathtime Stage 1: The Gear

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The diagram above is a bit fussy and more meant for show horses, but it gives the gist of what all we use to make sure the horses have their best glam day, every day. We'll often keep our grooming tools in designated bags or buckets that just make keeping track of our tools a lot easier than getting them one at a time.

ADVISORY: NEVER WALK BEHIND A HORSE, NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU TRUST AND LOVE THEM! The biggest etiquette no-no you can commit when practicing horse safety and working with horses is to walk behind them. Horses have nearly 360 degree vision, with their only blind spots being directly in front of and directly behind them. When you're in a horse's blind spot, if it's spooked in any way with its head restrained, its first response will be to kick. A kick from a horse can absolutely be lethal depending on how big the horse is, where they hit you, and how hard they kick. A horse will easily kill you by breaking your skull if their back hoof impacts your head. To avoid being kicked by a horse if you have no other way to get around them, you literally hug their butt with your body while scooching around to the side you need to get to. Only once you're clear of the horse's back hooves can you un-hug that booty and step away. That way, if the horse does decide to kick, they're more likely to scoop you up on their legs and knock you aside than pummel you with an iron-soled fist made of thumbnails compressed to be hard enough to crush a wolf's skull.

Bathtime Stage 2: Brushies!

Now, brush time is usually happy time for the horse! It feels good and is very much like stimming for them. On more than one occasion, I've actually had horses doze off and start snoring while standing up as I was brushing them because they were having such a nice time. It's a myth that horses always sleep standing up like cows do; they usually hunker down in their piles of straw and curl up like even bonier borzois, but they can nap standing up. And yes, horses can and do snore! They can fart hilariously loud, too. I've never heard such thunderous cheek-clapping as when I've heard horses farting.

Generally speaking, the body-brush we use is called the "dandy brush" in the above diagram, but I was always used to calling it the "bristle" brush, because they're usually made with the bristles taken from wild boar hides to make them. We generally brush their bodies with the dandy brush for as long as our arms can hold out, because you never can get all the dirt and shed hair out when you're brushing a horse, and we're going to bathe them anyway.

Some horses don't like having their faces brushed, and don't usually need it unless they actually have gotten dirty. That's when we use the face brush, which is much narrower with denser, yet slightly softer bristles for working out mud spots and dirt without irritating the horse's skin. I, personally, would only spot-clean visible dirt, and then use a small washcloth during bathtime to give horses a face wash.

A "curry comb" is just a brush with very thick, firm pegs or wire bristles that's meant for breaking apart thick cakes of mud matting in the horse's hair. Horses instinctively like to roll in mud and dirt as a natural way of keeping pets like flies away and to keep cool in the heat - especially after they've just been bathed and prepped for a show goddammit - and so they can come in from the pasture pretty heavily caked in mud, and proud of it. Curry or wire combs just help break up dried mud and loosen it from the horse's skin so it's easier to wash out.

Combing a horse's mane and tail are also essential to their care, just like it's important to care for your hair on a regular basis to keep it from matting and getting yucky. Their manes and tails tend to be very, very wiry and stiff, and it can be surprisingly tricky to work out tangles and knots. Along with a very sturdy steel comb, sometimes we'll use something like coconut oil - which is safe for their skin and if they ingest it - like a natural leave-in conditioner to help us work out bad tangles without hurting the horse. Braiding a horse's mane and tail is highly traditional, especially in folklore from the British Isles. To this day, legend says that if you find your horse's mane and tail braided overnight one day, the faeries snuck into the barn and did it as a show of favor!

There's actually a huge link between horses and Celtic folklore that's really fun to explore, but that's another post.

Stage 3: Hoof Picking

While stable hands and riders aren't necessarily trained to trim a horse's hooves, we do keep their feet and legs healthy through regular "picking". Maintaining a horse's hooves is how you can directly protect them from injury and illness, and is probably the most important part of a stable hand's job in prepping a horse for the day.

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Horseshoes are always crafted to sit on the very outermost edges of the bottom of a horse's hoof, as that's where their feet spend the most time impacting the ground as they walk. As you look inward, their hooves actually have hollow spaces in the bottom like the arches to the sole of a person's foot. The person in the above photo is using a hoof pick to gently scrape out dirt, mud, rocks, and any other bad stuff that can get gunked up in those hollow spots.

In my experience, horses are often trained to lift each leg on command for picking-time by either a verbal command, or a gentle squeeze to the tendon on the leg you want them to lift. For most of my working time, the signal was two light squeezes on the back of the leg.

Once a horse lifts their leg up for picking, it's easier for people who have limited physical strength to straddle either side of the horse's bent leg, facing away from the horse's face, and help keep the hoof held up with one hand while picking and cleaning it out with the other. While we're picking, we're looking closely for anything that could hurt the horse later. The #1 worst thing to find in a horse's hoof is a rusty nail, which are very, very common around a farm setting, and can cause a serious and life-threatening infection if it's able to pierce the horse's foot. We also check for any smells or visual signs that the horse is injured or hurting.

Regarding horseshoes and nail trims: It's pretty uncommon for your everyday stablehand to trim your horse's hooves. A significant, yet essential, cost for any horse owner is maintaining a ferrier, or horse foot specialist, whose main job is to maintain a horse's feet. Many nowadays are also equipped to make and fit their own horseshoes on-site for if your horse "casts a shoe" (has a horseshoe come loose and fall off), so they can fit them with a new one at the same time as they're trimming up their nails. I met one ferrier that actually had a miniature forge in the back of his work truck. It was awesome watching him work.

Stage 3: The Bath Begins

For the sake of their long-term health, most working ranches will see to it that their horses are bathed daily - sometimes multiple times - just like giant dogs. Horses that aren't ridden every day or are otherwise kept more like pets don't typically need as much bathing, but you should never put tack on a dirty horse. Horses don't have fur; they have hair like humans do, and so we use special horse-formulated shampoos and conditioners for bathtime, even in winter when it's so cold your hands go numb carrying in the water buckets.

I've never encountered a horse that was bothered by cold water, but that's because I live in a region that gets very cold winters, and I always bathed horses inside the barn where it was warm on days where it was very cold out. Some horses will refuse to cooperate unless they have tepid or warm water to bathe with (or will only allow a cold water bath if it's already very hot outside), and you have to be careful when around their legs and feet, since they'll sometimes stomp their legs from the sensation of water dripping off them.

For the most part, you only need to wash a horse from neck to backside, and down their legs, and you want to get them wet with their bathwater first before you apply any shampoo. Then, gently rub/massage with a soft sponge or grooming gloves until caked-on mud gives way and the shampoo starts to really lift away dirt and grime. We always wash manes and tails, but we never use shampoo or soap on their faces! Like I said before, a soft, damp cloth and regular water is usually all that's needed to bathe a horse's face.

Blow-drying horses isn't usually something I'm used to seeing, as they don't tend to appreciate the noise. Microfiber towels, or even just regular paper towels, combined with a sweat scraper are usually enough to get the horse comfortable and able to air-dry the rest of the way. After the excess water is gone is when coat conditioners or skin moisturizers are applied, and if a horse needs to stay pretty before a show or event, it's not unusual to line their stalls with wood shavings instead of straw beforehand. Wood shavings wick away the moisture they want to roll off, and are also pretty easy to brush off before it's showtime.

Phase Three: Tacking Up

I'm going to break this up into two examples: English, and Western style tack. There is an absolutely massive array of different kinds of tack all over the world, but the most common forms of riding and tacking in the Western world are English and Western, and I'll be comparing the tack used in both.

Blankets:

English Saddle Blanket:

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Western Saddle Blanket:

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Blankets or saddle pads are essential to riding! Saddle blankets/pads help protect the saddle - which are universally Not Cheap - from the horse's sweat, dirt, and shed hair, the blanket itself also protects the horse from developing sores on their backs from the friction of the rider moving in the saddle. Generally speaking, the very first thing we grab when it's time to tack up the horse is the blanket or pad that goes under the saddle.

The essential aesthetic difference between Western and English blankets is mainly that: aesthetics. Western blankets tend to be a lot bigger and almost always rectangular, made of a heavy material like wool or alpaca fleece, and bearing some kind of flashy pattern woven into the blanket itself - the most common styles being either made by or reminiscent of local Native American art styles. An English blanket or pad is either much smaller (again, a key to the aesthetic of the English riding style is subtlety), can be made of smoother and lighter fabrics, and can even even cut specifically to fit beneath the saddle with as little excess material showing as possible.

Speaking of, a lot of indigenous groups in America sell things like hand-woven saddle blankets at shows, farmer's markets, and online as a way of supporting their community! There's nothing wrong with you, as a non-Native American, buying from a community that's willingly selling to you, and it's a great way to help both show them monetary support as well as show off their work to other potential customers. Horse-people talk a lot about where they get their gear!

Western vs English Saddles:

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As you may be able to see, Western saddles are a lot more complicated than English saddles, mostly because they're designed for different types of riding.

English saddles, and English riding, is usually considered the typical "fancy rich people horse show" riding style, and the most common things done with that riding style is something commonly called "showing". Western riders tend to practice more competition-based, sports-centered riding, while English riding is more about showing off you and your horse's grace, etiquette, and bearing, and it's usually the horse that gets the most scrutiny out of the judges; being assessed for the quality of their gait and their precision and speed in completing tasks like a jumping obstacle course.

As a result, English saddles don't have that many bells and whistles to them, and generally tend to be designed to be as light and unassuming as possible. As I've said before, I've never liked English riding, because I feel fragile in the saddle and like I can't really get stable to go fast, as I am a speed freak in the saddle.

Western saddles were designed to be tough, heavy, stand up to a lot of abuse, and give the rider plenty of room on the horse's back to move around and work. Western saddles are built to be less likely to slide off the center of the horse's back if the rider has to lean hard on one stirrup (such as to shoot a gun sideways or lasso a sprinting cow before it can barrel off the side of a gully and get itself killed). The iconic horn is largely used for holding things like coils of rope, and it's considered a Western riding etiquette no-no to cling to the horn for stability. The horn is not there to stabilize you. It's there to keep your hands free.

The stirrups are also very different. A Western style stirrup needs to be much thicker underneath the rider's foot in order to give the rider a better platform to stand on, as well as more static friction (yeah, physics is involved in this stuff) to keep them stable in the saddle when the horse is moving very fast or very aggressively while they're also doing their own thing on the horse's back. The extra long fenders compared to the English knee pad are also there to help keep the saddle itself, which can weigh up to 60lbs/27kgs, centered so it doesn't slide and dump the rider off!

English stirrups are more there to slot into the heel of a riding boot, which always have a tiny bit of a heel regardless of whether it's designed for a male foot or a female one, as the heel serves an active purpose for the riding process rather than being there for fashion. Riding boots are designed with a channel in the heel to more securely and comfortably align with the stirrups, and don't need to be very thick or tremendously sturdy to heavy use, as English riding is more about showing off the skill and communication between the rider and the horse with as few flaws as possible vs. something more sports-oriented like target shooting, where the judges are factoring in your accuracy:speed ratio.

The Dreaded Cinch:

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Depending on the rider and the style, a saddle can have either one or two cinches (leather belly straps). The frontmost strap usually fits behind the horse's front legs, out of the way where it could cause the horse any harm while running, and often comes with a pad to keep the strap from chafing the skin, and to help keep the front portion of the saddle centered. Most horses don't mind that strap, as it just needs to be tight enough to fit.

What every horse I've ever met hated is the center belly cinch, which is the primary cinch for a lot of riders. It's critical to keeping you, the rider, alive on horseback, but it's one of the least fun sensory experiences for the horse due to how tightly it needs to be drawn to keep the saddle steady regardless of speed. Some horses will inflate their bellies to look fatter while you're tightening the cinch up to try and trick you into leaving it a notch or two too loose. It doesn't actually hurt them to have the cinch properly tightened; they just find the sensation annoying and can get mischievous if they're having a lazy day.

After the belly cinch is tightened, if you share your saddle (such as if you're taking classes and rent the tack that goes on your horse), you also want to adjust the length of the stirrups to properly suit the length of your legs. If you own your saddle and aren't getting any taller or shorter, this is usually a skippable part because you've already done it a while ago.

Bridles:

Once again, there are different kinds of bridles for different uses! There are bitless bridles, like this:

Reasons for using bitless bridles can vary. A bridle with a bit usually doesn't do any harm to the horse while providing more control to the rider over where the horse is going with its head. Horses that spook easily, are prone to misbehaving, or just aren't very thoroughly trained yet are usually trained on bridles with bits in order so the rider can take control of the horse's head and better guide them in the direction they need to go.

Bitless bridles are naturally more comfortable for the horse, since nothing has to go in their mouths, and allows for them to do things like graze freely if you're riding them out in pastures and spaces where you're likely to take breaks from riding in places where food is growing. Horses with sensory issues, that were late in being trained to ride, or that have dental problems a bit would irritate tend to do better with bitless bridles, but the rider themselves have to be willing to sacrifice that extra control and trust the horse more.

What are bits for and what types are there?

The main bit types I've seen most in my experience are Snaffle Bits.

Snaffle Bits:

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As you can see, there are quite a few varieties of snaffle bits. In horse terminology, snaffle bits are considered "severe" bits, although they don't actually do any harm to the horse. "Severe" is more meant to describe the level of control and rigidity the bit provides to the rider compared to the level of freedom the horse has when they're riding together. Most horses are trained on and completely fine with snaffle bits, and if they do have any issues, the owner can switch types to see if the horse is more comfortable with a different type.

(source)

With bits, their primary uses are to communicate with and direct the course of the horse's head when the rider pulls on or relaxes the reins in their grip. Some horses can be very flighty and need the help of a sturdy bit that has the potential of pinching the corners of their lips if the rider has to pull too hard to get them under control in the event of a scare. For other horses that don't need as much correction or situational control, they respond best to the sensation of the metal's pressure even on their tongue and lower jaw and move in the direction they feel the metal press the most firmly in their mouth.

Bits do not automatically destroy a horse's teeth. What a lot of people who haven't worked with horses aren't totally conscious of is that horse's jaw looks like:

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Between their frontmost teeth and molars, there's a huge gap where there's nothing but free space, and a bridle's bit is usually so small compared to the space the horse naturally has in its mouth that they can often comfortably graze and drink water with the bit still in, although some will try their hardest to spit the bit out when they want to eat, but that's more of a preference than a pain issue. Their front teeth are used for plucking food out of the ground (or biting the shit out of your unsuspecting stable hand's love handle when they're distracted), and they use their tongues to guide the food back toward their molars to chew. Experienced horses can often figure out how to eat around the bit still in their mouths, but they don't like it, and nice riders will take the bit out (you can do this without removing the bridle) when they're not needed so the horse can have its mouth back.

My character is in from riding. What's the routine like after you're done?

Firstly, if the horse is very hot and still huffing and puffing from all the work/running it's been doing, we'll swap their bridles out for halters, put them on a leading rope:

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Which, yes, can be tied into a bridle if you aren't a raging lazy ass like I was if you have the right type of rope, and then we'll take the horse on a cool-down walk in the paddock or a covered arena.

Like joggers and other heavy-exercisers, it's essential for the health of the horse's heart to help them slowly wind back down from working themselves into a literal sweat for so their heart rate gently returns to a lower pace. Stopping an overheated and overworked horse cold can actually be more stressful on them than if you take them for a slow, steady walk (sometimes just in circles until they slow down to a stop on their own), until they're steady and relaxed enough to be ready to tack down, brush out, and either let them back out to the paddock to roam, or put them to bed in their stall for the night with some fresh food and water. Their hooves are re-picked and checked again for any signs of damage or wear, and if they're especially sweaty, may need some towel-off time with a sweat-scraper and actual towels or fistfuls of straw.

The final, most important part of the day:

Spending quality one-on-one time with the horse with no tack, no riding, and no fussing around with work. Horses love to play, they crave affection and attention, and are extremely intelligent and curious. They get zoomies. They can be complete dorks. They can be love-bugs. They can even be protectors. They love following their favorite people around and watching what they're doing, and even try to involve themselves somehow (usually by flagrant acts of hat/jacket theft). They can get bored and destructive like puppies and kittens. If they're lonely for you and you haven't visited in a while, they'll chew on the edge of their fence to comfort themselves - it's called "cribbing".

You know those videos showing quirky families that live with a horse in their house part-time or full-time? That's not that unrealistic for horses at all. They're highly social, and prefer to sleep and live in close groups. They love to be pet and scratched, and often will try to reciprocate shows of cuddling and affection the best they can.

When a horse loves their rider, riding becomes fun for them both! When there's a real bond between them, the tacking and riding process can all be part of what the horse perceives as play and bonding time. Horses that are trained to do handle other sports, such as horseback sharpshooting, barrel racing, racing in general, polo, and the like can also genuinely enjoy the sports they play like human athletes!

[7ban-sama]

hello 7ban-sama !! i have a question.. about the mahou shojou tbhk au - so… if nene was captured by the evil horse twinsies??? would they maybe… corrupt her..??? what would happen to her ? would they take all her magic away.?????

Hiya. *placid smile* I'm being asked about my silly horsies... wow...

Ah but yes, Nene is being captured by them in my art... Well. Historically I've really liked shoujo as a teen, so I've read and watched a handful of magical girl things. I'm a fan... I even like ah, specifically the cheesiness of villains flirting with the heroine. So imagine my delight, that AidaIro would have the Yugi twins as some sort of dastardly villain counterparts to mahou shoujo Nene-chan...!! So exciting!

Kidnapping was my most immediate thought, I wanted to see it. 9.9 I imagine that Amane has been taunting Nene for a while on her adventures, but it's never felt too 'serious' to Nene... The twins, they are strange, Tsukasa like fangirls over Amane being cool, and Amane doesn't seem like he's taking anything too seriously either. Cycle of: they banter, they battle it out, they all go home at the end of the day. (The twins tf into unicorns and trot off together. Or, Amane like rides, Tsukasa, hyaa.) Episodic, whimsical. So at first when she's captured by them, she thinks this will be rote, that she will be rescued eventually or outsmart them. The twist is this is going to be permanent... (Like if this was an anime you were watching, you'd be shocked, wait what do you mean she's not going home? What? What happened to all the other stuff?)

I think the first thing Amane does is strip her of her power, like break her wand... I imagine that what lets Nene transform is some bond with Yako (?) as she seems to be standing in as a magical companion of some sort ww, but I think she would be channeling her abilities through the wand she's wielding. Breaking it would mean she can't cast spells etc. for the time being, and while being kept away from her companions she can't get help recuperating her ability. She will stay in her magical girl form until she is fully exhausted physically, however.

Nene still believes things are normal at this point, she thinks she will endure whatever... Random evil things they will do, use her as bait, or try and abuse her powers, huff huff-!! What she can't predict is that it has nothing to do with that... Amane has come to covet her, wants to steal her away. Imagine he hasn't even consulted with his 'faction', this is entirely personal, his own desire. It's... Amane, so he's become convinced that Nene is so into him, she's just playing hard to get at this point. Enough games though... Done with playing games.

While Amane is thinking all of this, Nene is... further behind, she may sometimes wonder if he "likes" her, but also doubt it since he's... evil?? Pfshh... So— while she is bound in rope, and Amane begins rambling, implying that this has been a long time coming, she is not thinking the same things he is. As he. Like starts, groping her, jkjfgh... and Tsukasa is behind her, restraining her, being instructed to move her around for Amane. Instructed to touch her as well! Confusing, disorienting, wait where am I-? That's how Nene feels.

I do imagine it being, fully noncon, something sprung upon her, ignoring any of her protests. Gets treated like she's being a difficult mare. Further restrained and made to wear (functionally) fetish gear, in the form of horse gear like, bit, halter, hobbles. Passed between the twins, run ragged. My vision, is VERY EXCESSIVE...!! But the point is that Nene is a normal girl, she had 'normal' expectations of what this dynamic was. Not ready for what Amane wants of her! The next shock would be that they don't release her at the end of this, even as Nene-chan has gone back to her normal, non-magical self. Just carry her off into the lair, keep her...

At this point, I do think of corruption...!! Both psychologically and magically. The first stage is just... excessive... sex... so much sex kfjfghg kind of mind-breaking Nene through this all. I think it's a little grim initially, really, because Amane has to process that she really was um, unprepared, and I think Nene would become despondent realizing she just won't be going home? And none of her team has found her or come for her... She doesn't feel valuable to them yet, and now she doesn't know what they're capable of, so there's this nebulous dread... Amane is kind of like, moody yandere, why aren't you happy to be trapped with me forever. But well, persistent as well, not going to let her go... Over time though I think Nene uncontrollably feels the allure of villain romance, and the, mystic being, unicorn, parts, like wait. I'm like their fair virgin maiden they couldn't resist. *really thinks about it* ... also it's crazy sex but also it feels good, there's just a point where it's like ahnghh wait but what IF this is my life. Forever now. HM.............

The magic part however... I actually owe it to my wife, she came up with something really interesting — a sort of magical horn that could TF Nene into a unicorn as well. But Amane would have to stab it into her skull. Simultaneously it would mind-wipe her, reduce her, made into a beautiful horsie as well... I thought of an extreme ending where Amane and Tsukasa give up their human forms and give up all they were doing, to live with this unicorn Nene. It'd be a crazy commitment though so it's the final note in their story, if that came to pass. Like Amane realizing he doesn't want anything else but to be with her and Tsukasa in some magical forest eternally together.

Ultimately I think they'd all have magic still, between them all. It's just that they're giving up the powers specifically granted by whatever their little familiars are, and whatever destiny they are tied to. It's like a story where the main character and the villains escape out of their roles... I mean, really it's a dumb hentai, but you know.

[rosyjuly]

PLEASE I WOULD DIE FOR 5 HC'S OF COWBOY MICK

thank you to both you and @userhamilton for indulging me 😌

1. When his mother tells Mick that it’s time he starts overseeing the ranch, Mick thinks she must be joking, because Gina is doing an absolutely stellar job at it. His mother purses her lips, tells him that Ian’ll propose soon — he’s already asked for her blessing. So they hire someone who can ride out in Mick’s stead while he tries to learn the — the damned big picture. After a too long week, Gina grows tired of it, and tells him that he needs a better teacher than her.

2. He’s known Sebastian for years, running into him in the parlor or on the porch, thick stacks of books pressed under Sebastian’s elbow. He’s kind, and patient, Mick finds, always ready with a joke to lighten the mood. The ledgers seem so simple, so evident when Sebastian talks about them, receiving Mick in his office in town after the sun’s gone down and less work is to be done.

3. They take to sharing a glass of whiskey or two when Sebastian deems their lesson done for the day, pulling out the chess board from his drawer. It’s a well-loved set: the pieces smooth and shiny from wear. Sebastian keeps a captured piece curled in his palm, his thumb idly tracing its edges as he thinks of his next move. Once, when neither of them are ready to cut their game short, Sebastian topping up their glasses, Mick takes his hand after another terrible pun, and recklessly presses his lips to the ridges of his knuckles. The piece clatters against the table and Sebastian’s hand slides to cup his jaw, and then they’re kissing, Mick finally stroking the gentle curls framing Sebastian’s face. Afterwards, Mick spends a good five minutes trying to locate the white queen that rolled under Sebastian’s desk when they knocked over the board in the heat of the moment, Mick too busy trying to press himself along the length of Sebastian’s body, the roll of his hips tantalizing, addictive as they rutted against each other.

4. “Take the long way around,” Sebastian tells him, and Mick was planning to — it must be what, ten more minutes, but it feels like a lifetime. When he finally spots Sebastian’s cabin, the soft light spilling out the windows,it’s a relief and torment all the same, vicious doubt twisting in his chest. It quietens when Sebastian opens his door, the small, pleased smile lighting up his face immediately. He takes Mick to the small stable, pats Angie’s side and tells her she’ll do just fine here with the horsies. Then they’re in the kitchen, Sebastian asking if he’s eaten, if he wants a drink— but his half-lidded gaze betrays that he hungers for what they’ve confessed they want, pressed into the other’s skin, breathed into his ear, promised between hot wet kisses. “Maybe— after,” Mick says, and Sebastian laughs, takes his hand and leads him into the bedroom.

5. Birthdays are a quiet affair. Mick spends most of it working, eats apple fritters with his mother and sister, and then steals away to Sebastian’s, where a notebook bound in soft leather is waiting for him, identical to the one he’s admired on Sebastian’s nightstand. And then Sebastian’s underneath him, drawing Mick in with his strong arms, winding his legs around him, heels digging into Mick’s back. The noises spilling out of him are everything; the choked off moans, the little sighs, the litany of Mick’s name repeated in his lovely voice. “Your mother asked me if I have any suggestions who you should marry,” Sebastian says, afterwards, and Mick’s hand promptly stills on his back. “I— what did you say?” Mick asks. Sebastian is still tracing idle figures on his chest, his fingers featherlight. “That I’d think about who’d make a good match,” Sebastian says, and then he finally looks up, his blue eyes still glinting as a promise, but his smile is sad, resigned. “We knew what this was.”

[bugeyedfreaks]

2, 5, 12, 23 for each of the Gangreen Gang, and each of the Amoeba Boys

Oooof, that’s a lot! 💀 [cracks knuckles] Well, okay, here we go…

2. Favorite canon thing about this character?

Ace — I loooooove his sexy leotard! Kidding! I guess in general I just really admire his canonically chill attitude and fine leadership skills. If he wasn’t a wanted criminal he would be a really cool guy to hang out with.

Snake — IMO, one of the funniest scenes in the series is in Buttercrush, when Ace hands Buttercup a bat while Snake is in a junkyard car, and he pleads and begs her not to hit it, fear in his eyes, but she does, and he gets launched into (presumably) the stratosphere. The fact that he canonically survived that is very impressive to me.

Big Billy — The gang needs muscle, and Billy is it, but it’s adorable that he’s such a sweetheart. It really feels like he just goes along with whatever the gang’s doing because, at the end of the day, he doesn’t really know any better. It’s less about doing crime for crime’s sake and just more about having fun with his homies. Despite being so big, he’s the little bro of the gang.

Also I love that he is a cyclops, very cool. 👁️

Li’l Arturo — I love that he can be tossed around like the football or the basketball. His talent is being smol and aerodynamic and I love it (I also love his pride for his deadly comb Maria!).

Grubber — You have to respect a hunchbacked boy who likes horsie rides. That whole sequence with him on the horse at the arcade in Schoolhouse Rocked is so cute and wholesome. …weirdly enough, as strange and gross as he can be (affectionate), there are many other wholesome Grubber moments in the show.

Bossman — His VOICE is just so iconic. Rest in peace, Chuck McCann, and it’s so sad he had to be in the awful reboot before he passed because I’m gonna miss hearing that amazing gangster voice in the future, see?

Slim — 😳 Uh… I…… love that…….. he is…… canonically….. skinny! (Phew! 😮‍💨)

Junior — I love his BOTTOMLESS STOMAAAAACH he has like the Mary Poppins neverending bag of innards. It may be gross, but you have to admit, it is quite the talent.

5. What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them?

I don’t think of specific songs for each of them, but for the Gangreen Gang AND the Amoeba Boys, they both have very iconic theme songs (the GGG’s one is VERY funky, I love it… plus the gloopiness of the Amoeba Boys’ one is veeeeery gloopy and fits them well).

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

Okay, I know you asked for one for each of them, but I truly do look at both gangs as, like, whole units when I think about headcanon stuff. One that I like to think about with the GGG is the origin story I have in my brain of how they all met. I imagine at some point they were all total strangers, just happened to all be green, all happened to wander into the dump on the same day, said, “Hey,” and immediately decided they were gonna be best friends for life and were cool chilling with each other. It’s really stupid, but it makes me laugh thinking about it. 😆

With the Amoeba Boys… I dunno! Never really thought about one for them before. Maybe a headcanon could beeeeee that they’ve been wandering around the Townsville area since the dawn of time, constantly splitting/reproducing/reforming to survive (which is why in modern times they’re almost as big as humans), attempting to cause mischief because they’ve always thought the people they saw doing it were really cool (of course, they’ve always inexplicably had their gangster accents and hats, too). Perhaps back in the day they would bug the Ministry of Pain to let them join in on their chaos so they could help fight Captain Righteous and Lefty. Who knows!

23. Favorite picture of this character?

Again, I dunno if I have the strength to pull from all of my screencaps for ALL of them (because if I do I will never finish this to post it), so I will round it down to two of my faves to represent each gang, inspired from my canon favorites list:

[forever-eternal]

Do you have any stories a out Texas? Or anything about him being a cowboy

Trip to the Market

Gabriel wants to ride Pa’s horse.

———————————————————————

The first tome Gabriel ever saw a horse, he was five-years-in-body and three-years-a-state. His Pa had several horses, for when he and Mama wanted to take the long way somewhere. They had horses for solo riding, horses for carriage pulling, and horses the Humans could rent or purchase.

Gabriel’s favorite of Pa’s horses was a brown and white splattered saddle horse named Milky Way, Pa said she was named after the galaxy they all lived in— whatever that means.

He remembers the day very clearly, the first time he ever saw a horse. The first time he ever rode one.

———

“Pa!” His little feet thud against the floor as he ran to catch up with the man, who paused— his black top-hat, with the buff-yellow ribbon around the base, a blue pendant on the left side, just inches from sitting on top of his head.

The man’s green eyes were curious and so warm as they looked down at the boy.

“Yes, Gabriel?” The man lowered the hat as he turned to kneel, “Is there something you need?”

Gabriel flushed, looking away shyly— all his previous confidence gone in the face of his Pa’s gentle smile. He scuffed his foot on the floor, and fiddled with the ends of his sleeves.

“U-um— are you riding your horsie today?” He stumbles over the words, peaking at the man from the corner of his eye.

His Pa hummed.

“Yes, your mother needs something from town but was called into work an unable to get it herself. Since it’s not too far, I felt Milky Way would like to stretch her legs.”

“Can…can I come? I-I wanna ride the horsie too.” He turns to his Pa, eyes large and pleading— the way Mama taught him to get what he wanted from Pa.

But from the look in Pa’s eyes, it was unnecessary.

Pa smiles, large and proud.

“Of course, my dear star!” He stands, sweeping Gabriel up into his arms with a squeak. “You’re already dressed and have your shoes on— why, all you need is your coat!”

Pa puts on his hat and swipes Gabriel’s coat from the closet before they’re out the door— the solid wood clicking shut behind them.

His Pa takes long strides along the worn path to the stables, humming as Gabriel holds tightly to him. They stop at the middle stable on the right, where Milky Way resided.

He’s placed on his feet, pulling on his coat as Pa unlocks the stable— carefully guiding Milky Way out into the open.

Pa shows him how to attach her reigns and put on her saddle, holds him up so he can pet her nose— he giggles when she huffs a breath into his hand—, and shows him how to sit on the saddle without hurting Milky Way.

Once he’s settled, Pa climbs up behind him and fits his feet into the stirrups. Pa’s reaches around him to hold the reigns, and he’s settled back against the older man.

Gabriel holds tight to the reigns as well, once Pa makes a noise and Milky Way starts to trot down the road, his small hands next to his Pa’s larger ones.

The feeling of Milky Way walking, the motion that came with it, his Papa warm behind him…it made him sleepy, but he wanted so bad to stay awake— it was better than he imagined, riding a horse, and he wanted to experience it entirely!

His Pa’s body rumbles behind him as the man chuckles, clearly noticing Gabriel’s drooping eyes.

“Go ahead and sleep, little star.” Pa’s voice is quiet and gentle, and it makes him even more sleepy, “Your mother will be very cross with me if I were to let you go on without a nap.”

And with the knowledge that Pa won’t let him fall, Gabriel leans back and falls asleep.

———

Gabriel wakes up, carried in one of Pa’s arms as the man walks through the market, with his little arms feeling heavy.

He grumbles slightly at being awake, but blinks his eyes open slightly, his head tucked into Pa’s neck.

He watches his Pa speak to the shopkeep, decides it isn’t worth his time, and closes his eyes once more.

[lyxanislive]

Hi (●’◡’●)ﾉ

Do you have any shallura headcannons?

SHALLURA HEADCANONS?!?!

Oh my god! YES! 4 years after the finale Here I am!!!

Anyway sorry this took so long I've been travelling and have been trying to put this together during bullet train rides and this is formatted badly!

Okay here we go!

PRE EARTH HEADCANON

-They talk at night, all the time. It starts small and like every other night sorta thing but then grows to them purposefully not going to bed so they can talk

-After one too many times of Shiro and Allura falling asleep around the castle in these talking adventures they wind up just going to Alluras bed, even if shiro's real awkward about it at first, Alteans have no reservations about this kind of thing

-When it comes to flirting not only are both of them So bad at realising it is happening but their flirting is so alien to each other as it should be

-Shiro is very touching and longing stares for flirting. He'll stare at her from across the room or stare into her eyes when she's talking at night and often reaches out and touches her arm or hand or hair. If it weren't for Adam, Shiro would not even know how to date

-Allura is very talk flirty and action flirty, the problem is 2 fold as the innuendo are altean and even if they made sense, Shiro wouldn't get them anyway. She also tries to prove how capable she is infront of Shiro as this is an Altean flirting technique.

-Shiro is, and will always be an ass man. Legs are okay BUT he always 1st checks BUTT while Allura is an eyes person, while she finds Shiro physically appealing I like the idea that Alteans love the eyes and the markings by them. 

-they never make it past a DISCUSTING amount of longing for each eachother

-Allura and Shiro often touch forehead to forehead when resting together, while Shiro thinks it's cute to Allura this is very intimate

POST SOUL TRANSFER HEADCANONS

-When the soul transfer happens, Shiro clings to Allura so tightly that part of her goes with him. This makes it so that Shiro is always longing to be with Allura and Allura feels empty without Shiro. They never find this out but they do know they feel better together 

-They can now tell when the other is close by and what direction they are in

-in quiet moments they can almost feel how the other is feeling. Not really mind reading but like super empathy?

-it's only after the soul transfer do they know each others feelings and they just kind of unspokenly get together. Like oh she likes me, I'll kiss her. While she's thinking, oh he likes me, I'll kiss him.

ON EARTH HEAD CANON

-Allura never learns to read any Earth languages, but she has an Instagram. She takes the pictures and Shiro writes the captions for her. She does learn to read numbers though.

-Alteans don't wear underwear. This is both delightful and mortifying to Shiro depending on when he finds out

-Neither can cook - and since allura can't read they struggle to not burn the frozen things they usually make. Hunk is mortified and often gives them leftovers from his big family meals

-Allura is terrible at piloting anything smaller than a lion. Like just God awful at it. Especially things she's not connected to. Shiro, ever patient, tries to teach her but she gets frustrated and he doesn't own a single personal vessel that doesn't have at least 3 dings in it

-Allura is a fantastic navigator and great copilot for not only Earth trips but space trips too. She quickly picks up on identifying horses so she can point and say "horsie" while on trips. But Allura misidentified many "horsies" and it becomes an inside joke with them where Allura will point to litterally anything and say "horsie"

-Allura hates ALL of Shiros music. She'll put up with it but man he puts on "danger zone" or "final countdown" or something and she'll cringe. It turns out metal is very close to altean music, so they compromise with nu metal.

-they visit the memorial wall every year to leave flowers for Adam. Allura feels awkward and stands far back at first but eventually Shiro invites her up and she starts talking to Adam too when they visit

-Bed time is a struggle, Allura likes to stay up and talk like they used to but Shiro can fall sleep in an instant. Like mid sentence. He also drools on her pillow, but she hogs all the blankets and turns diagonally in her sleep. Her feet are also impossibly cold all the time

-Allura wears Shiros sweaters because she finds Earth cold. However she seems to always get random stains on them

-Shiro is TEAM DAD and organizes outing and trips, but Allura is just so enthralled by every thing Earth and other planets have to offer that his military precision timing goes RIGHT out the window

-Allura does not understand vacuum cleaners and refuses to own one. They get a roomba

-Alteans cannot eat red meat, it makes them violently Ill. While Coran is the first to discover this, Allura still has her own trials. Shiro always orders her food

-Shiro never fills the water filter and Allura claims that if he wasn't perfect in every other way - she would have left him in the lion for this injustice

-Their favorite boardgame is sorry. Allura likes saying sorry in increasingly dramatic fashions 

-Alluras favorite card game is Uno. Shiro has never beaten her.

-Shiro is allergic to bees, he once got stung and Allura thought he was flirting with her. Matt had to drive him to a hospital.

-They get a big 5 bedroom house not far from the Holts. Coran and Romelle live with them because Allura can't stand a quiet house. Keith has a trailer on their land which Allura hates the look of and she constantly goes out to redecorate and paint whenever Keith leaves for Blade things.

-when cuddling on a couch, allura Always has to have her leg on top of one of Shiro's 

-Shiro loves playing with Allura hair, he never styles it well he just likes touching it

-Allura is afraid of the ocean so she wears a life jacket over the cutest swimsuits. Shiro pulls her in a ridiculously large pink floatie around 

-Shiro cannot take allura grocery shopping, she constantly grabs the most weirdest things and puts them in the cart. Once she put sprigs of ginger in the cart and then insisted she wanted them for a snack …. She later threw them our and pretended the whole thing never happened

I left out the sexy headcanons for now but I hope you enjoy this list!

[monty-glasses-roxy]

Ya know, current setups are real fun, but I've been playing horse games again lately and I've noticed some things...

If Roxy were to find the horses in storage and decide to keep them as her own, her only knowledge of horses up to that point would be horse games. I'm trying to think about the other ones I've played because I can't say I ever really looked for accuracy before, but depending on the games, Roxy would have a surprisingly hard time with this.

To my memory, none of them have the saddle positioned correctly. I don't remember any that used martingales or chest plates which some of the Plex horsies have. Horse games are designed in such a way that you can visibly see where the budget and time was put in, meaning you have some games that tell you a little about what you're doing, and some that are very detailed about certain aspects of horse care, but completely fuck up the rest of it. It's fascinating to me.

If Roxy played Bella Sara for example, she would know you can't ride until you've cared for your horse, but she wouldn't know about any sports outside of show jumping. If she played Pony Friends, she would know about trail riding, that racing is a thing and that horses get sick if not cared for properly, but may not understand that you can't ride a sick horse. Sick horses aren't really relevant here, but you see my point.

Like the standard sports tend to be show jumping, cross country and the chronically under-explained dressage games. They also all have a mechanic for brushing the horse and cleaning the hooves out, with most of them having you clean out the stable too. BUT none of them are consistent outside of that. So even if she played a bunch of them, she's not going to know what she's doing at all

Brushing and combing is straight forward enough. There's a method to doing hooves and stuff she'd not know but if she can figure out how to lift their foot up, she'll be fine. She may also know about leg wraps from some games and would find it pretty easy to do simple hairstyles with them, though the tail would be a bit harder.

But that saddle is not staying on that horse. She may get a basic bridle right but probably doesn't know what the bit is. The horses are literally built to help in teaching this stuff and they're struggling trying to find ways to help her but they're fucking horses man. What are they gonna do? All they can do is kinda give her a nudge, make loud noises, move out the way, steal shit and bite her. The Minis are trying to help but they also don't know what they're doing at all so that's not working either

The absolute relief when Roxy finds Foxy's bird and reactivates her. They've never been so excited to see a duck before. Things get easier at least, but lack of information is only part of the issue for Roxy so uhh... Yeah it's not the biggest improvement ever, but hey! At least the saddle's staying on this time!

[slasheru]

how would the romancables react to mc wanting kids with them (biological or adopted doesnt matter)

Oh my god how have I never thought about this?!?!?!?1

HEX: Holy SHIT Hex would be the best dad ever. EVER EVER EVER. He's out there giving horsie rides (no offense to Headless Horsemike), swinging the kids around, letting them ride on his shoulders, playing pretend, letting them dress him up, taking them to the park, I'm actually getting weirdly emotional thinking about how wonderful of a dad Hex would be. So warm and compassionate and understanding and loving :'))) and he'd be an AMAZING stay-at-home dad, too. Downside is he'd want like, 7 fucking kids. GOOD LUCK.

TATE: Tate never, ever wants kids, or so he says. The reason should be obvious (he never wants to end up like his dad or mom), but if he accidentally knocked the Player up OR somehow found himself in the position of having to look after a kid, he'd step up to the plate HARD. Tate might not be the most mentally well dad, and he might not know how to even, like, INTERACT with a kid ("uh.... is Saw appropriate for a 6 year old? No? Okay, I can do this. PeeWee's Playhouse was directed by Burton, right??") but he WILL show up to all their events and sports games and plays and graduation. He will try SO FUCKING HARD to be the best dad because he never had one, even if he doesn't know how. I love you Tate :'((((

LAILA: Takes this shit SO SERIOUSLY it's not even funny, lmao. Laila treats having kids (probably wisely??) like it's arranging a contract between feudal kingdoms. Are we financially stable? What will happen if we break up? What religion are we raising the kid?? (Laila doesn't follow a religion but she'd freak out about this sort of thing, for sure). That said, if she was in love with the Player and was ready to take the next step?? Get ready for 2.5 kids (the national average), AND starting to pick out what kindergarten they're going to when you're just STARTING to adopt/try for kids. GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR ALPHA MOM (Laila)

SAWYER: Okay, Sawyer has never said this and it's never come up, but he would secretly ABSOLUTELY LOVE TO HAVE KIDS. Like, a LOT. It's something he's always dreamed about - finding someone to settle down with, maybe having a family, having his own law practice or just being a good criminal justice lawyer helping people everywhere, it's SO wholesome. (Unlike Sawyer's sex life and murder career, which is holesome). Sawyer would probably prefer to adopt cause he's the kind of guy who thinks there are plenty of kids out there who need help (plus, he'd kind of rather teach a toddler how to communicate with the world than look after a straight-up newborn baby, but if you DID have bio-kids, you bet that baby would be SPOILED ROTTEN (positive, ofc)!

JUNO: Nope nope nope nope nope. Nope nope nope. No no no no. Oh, Player, c'mon. Why did you have to ruin this? It's a wonder that Juno even made it out alive (dead???) being the [ACT 1 JUNO SPOILERS] offspring of a dead guy and a live woman, but who KNOWS what would happen if you guys had a kid?? Plus, Juno is MAD dysphoric about getting knocked up. Maybe they'd be more okay with it if the kid was adopted, but Juno was meant to be the cool aunt/uncle and DEFFO not a parent. At least, that's what they say. (:

[chordsykat]

It’s The Revenge of Fanart Free For All!!!

I wanted to do something a little different this time. No colors, just working on some line art so I can focus on some new techniques with pencilling I haven’t used in a long time. BUT I did put some tones into them.

Here they are in “rainbowlogical order” :D

First up, we have @basthr0hmnse​ requesting some cuteness of the Toki/Aero variety! Love that Aero’s so little and so portable even next to a fairly-normal sized guy like Toki :D

@gointothevvater​ wanted some Ceelie arts and couldn’t choose between Mags or Pickles... and neither could I, so you all get both! And hey! Is Magnus back from the dead??? (yes)

And @hercannonyourface​ wanted a Charles but failed to note how naked they wanted him, so here’s a drawing of average-naked Charles!

And when you have a Charles without a jacket, it has to be hung somewhere. So I went ahead and drew one of my favorite things in this world to draw, which is Kris, requested by @cruisingheightswithdragons​ modeling the much-too-big Charles jacket!

A JD was requested by @vicekings​ and who am I to say no to that? Saw some of the horsies back out in the fields by my house for the first time in a while, and decided old Cowboygear (TM) had to be riding one, too!

@failedintsave​ said I should be drawing some Ness and Nita hanging out at one of Vanessa’s yoga classes, and I completely agree! This is definitely a pastime I can see Nita getting really into, with her love of meditation and all.

@exclectical likes reminding me that Skwisgaar gets worried whenever anyone gets hurt and that includes his rival/fuckbuddy when she battles the forces of evil. He gives her cookies BECAUSE DATS AMS WHATS THE REDS CROSS DOES TO CURES BLOODSLOSS.

@garnetcicada wanted a sketch of Wolfgang Vulpes Fox, who has the best name ever and I realized this was the first time I got to draw his very handsome grin... so I went all-in. :3

@fishklok had me choose between Satenik and some MagCharles AND ONCE AGAIN I HONESTLY COULD NOT CHOOSE BETWEEN THE TWO HOW COULD YOU MAKE ME CHOOSE IT IS NOT POSSIBLE! :D Satenik was inspired by the fall leaves (already) blowing by my truck as I made my way up the drive this afternoon. Ah, fall..!

And last but not least, @frienderbender​ wanted to see more Rikki and Nikki and so did I! There’s always room for more RikkiNikki ‘round these parts!

Guys, this was a great time as always. Thank you so much for your prompts. I look forward to the next one and will try to make it happen again as soon as possible! <3

[i-rate-horse-games]

starshine legacy playthrough part 1

level 1

dang these graphics are CRISP!!! this was a CD rom game??? jealous!!!

i did in fact think there was an award for “Dyke” in there

got confused because i thought the massive stairway landing counted as a floor

wow we have to explicitly demonstrate that we’re not like the other girls?? dang

HAHA showed our guts by winning at a horrible game of tag

wow ?,,, uhh, already foiled an attempt at framing the book girl… what kind of horrible school is this…

level 2 - jorvik stables

the music and ambiance is so cool and spooky and sad and mysterious

alright i tried every door in this courtyard trying to find linda and one opened so i thought i’d finally found it but . i can’t go anywhere in the arena i ended up at so i guess i haven’t found The Stables yet. rip

ah. found the door. i just hadn’t done the dialogue all the way

OH SHIT DEPRESSED HORSIE??

DEPRESSED HORSIE CAN TALK?? WHAT THE HELL

don’t worry girlie just believe in urself and riding a horse for the first time since ur injury won’t be a problem!!” last time i rode i got thrown off for the 7th time and got a concussion lmao this game knows me too well

nooooo why are they letting the transfer student get right in the saddle no questions asked

“you’ll hit the ground faster than i can say ‘white trash princess’!”

“i thought i was the white trash princess…”

ah shoot i got stuck trying to dismount and accidentally did a gesture on my touchpad that works as a back button. didn’t know it could do that

i could have sworn it said starshine would only jump if he was in a gallop, but we are clearly cantering.. odd

lisa is very carefree about what side she mounts and dismounts from

casually “hey kid! you rode the horse good! i bet you have superpowers!”

“oh i might have superpowers? lemme try this” [instantly is able to use powers on command] lisa is just built different

wow!! lisa’s ringtone is Awful!!

level 3 - the library

linda tells us to meet her at the school library after hours? book girl being a rulebreaker? way to go!

hehe the janitor humming

“i was afraid the janitor wouldn’t let you in!” so we could have just talked to him? instead of sneaking around?

mr sands is a vampire?? mr sands is immortal??

whoa starshine is immortal too?? you would think all immortals would know each other by now

level 4 where is starshine?

whoa the nighttime ambiance at the stables is so great there’s huge stars and HAHAH THERE’S THE SPOOKY LADY VOCALS I KNOW!! WOOOHOOO HELLO SPOOKY LADY

now which one of those hired arms wrote the location of their secret base on a prominently branded matchbox and left it at the scene of their crime??

sabine: “omg you can’t go after them, the parents and teachers will hate it!! so instead i’m locking you in the stable overnight. this is a good plan.”

i accidentally clipped through the floor of the watery basement sdjfksjdfhkjdfh

“we need to find a way out of the stables!!” i think i’m out haha

“i think it’s better if i go alone” no it isn’t??? hello???

[edit from the future - i now understand that lisa went alone so that her friends wouldn’t be put in the uncomfortable situation of having to report her extensive property damage and trespassing crimes]

level 5 - the industrial complex

ok we’re just breaking in . by walking in huge pipes! great! awesome! there’s those spooky lady vocals again!

oops i didn’t even notice the searchlight got me. very nice of the game to just calmly fade to black when we get spotted instead of jumpscaring me

we just exploded a huge pipe!!! awesome!

we are now walking through said huge pipe which we just exploded by buildup of steam internally! and not getting burned!

uhhhh

i don’t know where i’m supposed to be going but there’s a star down there soooo

I SHOULD NOT BE HERE????????

well if you leap into the water you only go back to the start of the water so that’s nice

OH WHAT THE HELL????????

this is a really fun escape scene but uh we fell . through the floor, it just disappeared. these are my True Powers..

rats now i gotta do it all over again

i love how there’s no falling animation, she just chillin

oh man i got so into that level that i let my laptop battery die for the first time ever… luckily it managed to save my progress somehow and i didn’t have to start the level over for the third time

 something i like about star stable franchise is how the game is less Horse Game and more Game heavily involving Horses, plot takes place surrounded by horses, which is fun

level 6 - the woods

at first i was like “i dunno, lisa, this looks like a pretty safe trail” but then it just kept getting WORSE and WORSE and OHHHH MANNNNN !!! WE SHOULD NOT HAVE BEEN JUMPING THOSE CLIFFS

level 7 - the competition

surprised that the snobby rich girl is our friend and on our side now? guess our gang has a common enemy in sabine. way to go girl! unity!

ok that was really fun!! looking forward to playing the rest of the episodes!!

part 2

[ndostairlyrium]

10 things about me 🍰

Tagged by @greypetrel @shivunin @idolsgf and @demandthedoodles 💛 thanks guys for the free therapy session! ;u;

1 - Sometimes I feel like I don't have a personality, just coping mechanisms and a whole lot of reactions caused by anxiety, which is one of the reasons why I started therapy. Apparently I need to just sit down and ask myself "what do you need now / in general?" and it's helping me finding out who is the person I'm wearing << she's kind of an idiot but I'm starting to like her the more I connect to her.

2 - Huge cat person. They're the most communicative beings on earth, they have social cues and a plethora of personalities. Did you know they evolved to mimick the cry of human babies to attract our attention? They have a special "meow", basically. When they do that, we immediately turn our attention to them because our preservation instincts kick in and we're forced to respond. I just love cats so much omg 💛

3 - I can't remember shit, really. It's either a problem or a funny thing because my memory is very selective for no reason lol I know that you hate peas but I can't remember if you needed a lift to the airport or a pack of crackers when we talked yesterday. But when something negative happens... ooohboi! I'll somatize that for years and would remember every single detail, even the color of the sky in that specific moment.

4 - Never tell me that The Divine Comedy is a fanfiction. That's a major turn off. It's one of those things I take very seriously, tbh <<

5 - I don't vibe with horses lol I befriended a horsie called Carrot when I was 7 and horse riding was one of my favorite things ever, until the guy made me fly to the ground because something scared him :' I don't really blame him, but it was a painful experience - hopefully for me only. I tried to connect with other horsies later on but it never worked out.

6 - I horribly love chocolate based desserts. Big faves are sachertorte (of course lol), tiramisù, millefoglie (it's a layered cake with custard/chocolate ganache and puff pastry), and everything that comes with chocolate ganache. Carnival fritters give me so much joy too! Last time I had those I almost wept because they were so good lmao

7 - I really enjoy weird Medieval guys, the miniature style critters you could find on tomes. I'm fairly obsessed with them because they're so stylistically elegant but so dumb to look at 💛 A new addiction I found out I have is looking for creepy looking baby jesuses on Medieval and Renaissance paintings whenever I visit an exposition.

I mean... Doesn't he make you laugh? He's glorious!! A Unit™

Also HIM! The lovechild of Billy Crystal and Tim Curry 💛 yes I have more, yes I will post my collection somewhere <<

8 - I never had bubble tea, but I will - once I gather enough confidence to try this cute Japanese bar that opened around here << they have like 50 different options and options make me feel like I'm in front of an audience ready to hit me with rotten fruits. Hopefully it's worth it? Lol

9 - My body refuses liquorice. I thought I was allergic but you can't be allergic to liquorice apparently. But like, hear me out, whenever I ate it, I got the most horrific allergic reactions, no kidding! Even its smell, or a smell close to that makes me wanna run as distant as I can because my skin reacts to it o-o

10 - I did write more than 5 long fics (not counting one shots) in a span of 10 years, which they say it's impressive, considering the amount of chapters and the multiple revisions I always do. I tend to be overly critical when it comes to my writings, so I tend to avoid rereading what I do, except for my second mass effect fic about the Lazarus project, "In A Moment", which I'm very proud of. It's a "what if Shepard asked herself how she came back and if she really came back before the events of me3? And what would her reaction be if she found out reapers' tech was involved in her comeback?" kind of fic. Spoiler: she didn't take it well. I couldn't find anything like that in the mass effect section of the site I publish my stuff in, so I wrote it myself lol it's in my native language tho .-. Hopefully one day I'll find an editor and a translator to cover in money

-

No I'm not dense, it's just an impression << whoops! Sorry!

And since even my grandma got tagged in this, I'm tagging automatically whoever feels like doing it lol

[abyssmalice]

📰 winks with both eyes

Send “📰” And my muse will answer these questions about your muse! / Still Accepting!

What is their name?

"Beebo!" She knows it's Sylvie. But Beebo is Beebo.

Relationship with them?

"They're..." Frowns, eyebrows furrowing. "Acquaintances...? Friends? They're friendly but I don't want to call them a friend. Because friends are— they're friends. And gods can't be too much of a friend to me."

What do you view them as?

"—Instead, they should be my horsie! They owe me a piggyback ride and a horsie ride anyway! It's an obligatory part of being a divine being, so I don't know why they just won't do it.

"Is it because they don't really think of themselves as a god anymore? Well, even if they were human, I'd still ask for a piggyback ride, so hah! Checkmate on that! In any case though, right now they're definitely not human, so there's no need to pretend around them. No need to be close, but no reason to act as much as I would for others."

What’s one thing you’d like to do with them?

"When will Beebo give me a piggyback ride..."

Tell us one memory you have with them.

"I remember putting flowers in their hair! It was fun! A good test of creativity, my Dendro skill... though, thinking back, I wish I could've put more poisonous flowers in their hair. They probably wouldn't be affected compared to a human, and big sister Tosha told me that sometimes, a flower is more beautiful to hide how much more dangerous it is - so the prettiest flowers are just too dangerous for humans, but Sylvie probably wouldn't bat an eye. What a missed opportunity."

Anything you’d like to ask them or state to them? If so, say it now, please!

"You can't run away from turning into a horsie forever, Beebo! Or a slime! One day you'll do it!!"

[tinytinybumblebee]

Tiny Astarion and my tiny Tav are master manipulators when it comes to getting things from the others with their puppy dog eyes and babby abilities.

They want one more horsie ride on Karlach's lap? Tav gently squishes Karlach's cheeks and tells her that she "is the bestest at it, even better than Halsin!" And bam, more horsie!

A sweet before dinner? Astarion will rest his chin on the counter Gale is cooking on and give the most powerful puppy dog eyes saying how he and Tav have been sooooo good today and should have a litttttle treat- typically Gale is firm on the "No, you'll ruin your appetite." so- the two tiny ones will just go on over to Halsin, lay their heads on either thigh of the druid until Halsin can't help but coo over the two little ones and sneakily give them a treat xD

Want to play with real weapons? Well- Lae'zel is actually very chill with just handing them swords, Shadowheart buts in like "What the hells are you doing?? They're much too young for swords! Here," as she takes the swords away and hands them daggers, "A bit more appropriate, yes?" (Cue Gale and Wyll running over like "Nope, nope, nope. Wooden swords only." )