#shoutout transitioning i love u transitioning

[dog-teeth]

been a while

[aropride]

shout out to trans people who want to transition but know they can’t. whether that be for legal, medical, social, personal reasons, a combination of those, something else entirely. i see u i love u i hope the world is nice to u today

[gayofthefae]

"The van scene is just for Will's plotline it doesn't affect Mike" what if I said the opposite was true. What if I said it did not serve as a climax for Will because he had already demonstrated an ability for honesty, vulnerability, and the self-assurance required in his confrontation of Mike in episode 2. What if I said that it only served his story as an inciting incident for the Jonathan coming out scene - a scene which, as I've said before, was the actual climax of his season arc, which was about his queerness, not Mike.

It is a setup for Mike, we know that, but it also doesn't really directly serve Will's arc at all. It is a self sabotage - setup for season 5, but something we already know him to do. It is a transition point for Mike. And it is the straw that breaks the camel's back for Jonathan. Besides that, it speaks directly to the audience at best. But it does not serve Will. He gets nothing truly off his chest because he is not unburdened - if anything worse off because he gave up his hope, he doesn't teach us things we couldn't otherwise deduce, and it moves him no internally closer to closure.

The speech only serves for Mike to react to and Jonathan to witness (and the cinematography reflects that). The following scenes reflect that too. The only scenes of importance in either plot following that are Will's scene with Jonathan and Mike telling El he loves her. Both directly tied to the speech, Mike's more textually, and no independently actionable resolution for Will.

This was the post but I had more thoughts, per usual

Will has a theme of unactionable resolutions. In episode 2 he is honest and from there the ball is in Mike's court. His most actionable plot is the painting, which he has demonstrated the vulnerability for already but the self-prioritization required is not a line he as a character is willing to cross, something that isn't a character flaw in need of resolution given what he logically believes the effects would be. The ball is in Mike's court from the beginning and remains there. And will remain there. Will had no arc necessity to confess because not confessing exposed no character flaws (shoutout to the writers for not presenting choosing to remain in the closet as a character flaw!!!). He was put in a helpless position of heartbreak and sadness and, like all of us wanted for him, wanted to do something about it, wanted to be able to do something about it, so he tried, but ultimately realized that the risk outweighed the reward, and the cost of the reward (El) would outweigh it anyways. That is logical. He is logical. He does everything logically. He is helpless this season. And he wants to believe he isn't, and we want to believe he isn't, but he is. Because the ball is in Mike's court. It was then and it is now. And it has been since the Snow Ball, really.

Because in December, 1984, after Will's perpetual but logical inaction towards a relationship, Mike took action against one. And since, it has been his job to undo, and his job to communicate contradictory to his actions that he wants one. Inaction does not require a solution unless it is representative of a problem to be solved. Will's is not. Mike's problem is he takes protective action impulsively when he gets scared that ultimately traps and harms him and others. Mike's problem is not inaction either. If they had stayed silently pining 13 year olds forever it would not have been a character flaw on either of their parts. But Mike took unnecessary - understandable, but unnecessary - action in the eyes of the plot. One can debate whether he did it in December 1983. Or whether he did it in July 1985. Or whether he did it in March 1986 when he ignored Will, because silence is not inaction if it as an active change. But no matter when it became an unnecessary choice,

The ball is in his court because it was never in anyone else's. The ball is in his court because Will never stepped foot on a court. Will isn't playing the game, he didn't pick up a ball. He sat in the stands and watched. In March 1986, he moved to the bench and Jonathan saw him but still, he never stepped foot on the court. He was never playing the game. (Apologies. This isn't a stupid sports game)/ref.

The ball is in Mike's court because as far as actionable plotlines reflecting internal growth go, Mike and Will's relationship is and always has been Mike's plot. Will's is allowing himself to take up space; he's getting closer, and allowing himself to have Mike will be the ultimate demonstration of that, just not its purpose. But Mike's is Will.

[gravyhoney]

YOOOO WHATS UP W THIS SILLY I'M SO CURIOUS

EHEHEEHEEHEH I LOVE HER THANKS FOR ASKING‼️‼️ Quickkkkkk warning for VERY brief mentions of underage drinking/weed smoking.

So she’s half dragon half shapeshifter. Specifically Geathal shapeshifter (the world my best friend and I have worked on since we were 13 n 12 respectively)

Dragon mom (Farrah) on the left, shifter mom (Asha) on the right.

She’s got two wayyyy older brothers (Juno, 11 years old than her, and C.J., 9 years older than her)

She’s the oldest of her friend group and dating Inky.

Fae and Inky started dating in Inky’s Junior year and faer own senior year, bc Inky was DOWN BAD the moment they met but never said anything bc Pastel had this awful boyfriend (insert obligatory joke about bisexual women dating homophobic men bc. That’s what happened.) but Pastel ALSO liked Inky, was just fucking awful at picking up cues n shit and didn’t know until they were doing ✨underage drinking and smoking weed✨ at a party none of them were supposed to be at and Inky and Pastel kiss, which leads to Pastel breaking up with luns shitty bf (who was also cheating on lun) and they talk about feelings and shit and take it way slow and. They’re the healthiest relationship in Golden Dandelions.

I’m planning on writing GD I PROMISE but for timeline shit, Pastel ends up out of the picture near-ish the beginning bc faer going off to college out of state. It’s gonna be a whole plot point about Inky needing to learn to let go and accept change and stuff, but yeah. Pastel goes to college and wayyyyy in the future after she graduates, she and Inky get happily married after Inky successfully doesn’t die. And then Pastel uses her psychology degree to become a therapist.

ALSO fun thing about her, she spent literal YEARS having to pretend to be human do to the ✨illegal nature of being not human in the city they all live✨ (this is remedied long before Golden Dandelions takes place) so her ref sheet reflects how she looked and presented when she was 19. Even after inhumans were allowed to exist as they were, the human beauty standards had been SO drilled into faer by then, that fae didn’t fully transition back to looking like faer true self. So in real actual canon, and way after Golden Dandelions ends her skin is a v light pinkish-purple instead of human person white.

She’s very fun to draw and I consider her one of my first ocs, only bc I created her after I knew what the term oc meant. Also she used to be an Undertale oc. Undertale AU oc if u wanna get specific. Shoutout Inktale.

[willow-lark]

one thing about me is that i will always and forever be a stoncy girly. i occasionally rb posts about them but i'm mainyl involved in the byler fandom atm so i don't talk ab them as much as i want to. anyways

stoncy is really interesting to think about particularly considering where things are in canon for the three of them right now. so, firstly, my thoughts on that:

i am 100% rooting for jancy endgame in-show. i'm not a fan of love triangles (hence why i started shipping stoncy in the first place, they all have chemistry n i think they should all kiss each other at the exact same time) but up until s4 there was no reason to think that jancy wouldn't be endgame, and honestly i'm upset that the writers brought stancy back in, considering that steve's s3 arc was all about him learning he doesn't need romantic love to fulfill his life, and what he and nancy each want in life simply are not compatible. jancy r iconic. jancy r goals. jancy had a whole speech in s4 talking about all the things they love about the other. although they've hit a slight rough patch due to jonathan's conflicting desires in supporting her goals while also being there for his family which has historically needed a lot of his support, they just need to get on the same page about this. they WILL prevail i KNOW this i TRUST

okay, lark, you say. if ur so obsessed with jancy endgame then why stoncy at all? AND I WILL TELL YOU WHY.

it all comes down to stonathan. also shoutout to @messrsbyler for championing the stonathan agenda lately. we should all attempt to live up to your example. SO TRUE.

so. post-s1 era in-show. or, honestly, u can rework this and make it fit at any point in the timeline. but anyways: nancy's with steve, they r trying and somewhat struggling to make it work (though they did last an entire YEAR so kudos for that ig). nancy VERY obviously has feelings for jonathan, who hangs out with her sometimes but is generally avoiding both of them. and honestly? steve thinks jonathan's pretty cool too. and, like, he spent a while treating jonathan like shit so he should probably try and make it up to him. right??? AND THEN THEY KISS.

no, but actually: steve's the type not to even realize that he's actually in love with jonathan. he's like, well, nancy loves him, and i love nancy, so... (that's the transitive property, right? i don't remember anything from 5th grade math class.) he doesn't even realize it's gay of him to feel that way. (NOTE: stoncy r bi4bi4bi and you WILL NOT be changing my mind.) if u extend the timeline to post-s3, robin might be able to help him w this LOL, i've read a really good fic or two where that's the case

on the other side, i feel like jonathan would have an easier time accepting his feeling, especially now that steve is making an effort to make friends with him. not to digress about the byers brothers but i'm gonna. when it comes to accepting his bisexuality jonathan doesn't have nearly as much internalized homophobia to deal with as will does regarding being gay. will has really internalized all of the things lonnie/the bullies have said about him, whereas jonathan is openly defiant of them. but in true byers fashion, he's not gonna make a move about it.

honestly i'm inclined to say that nancy, the girlboss that she is, (perhaps along with robin, again, if the timeline goes later) is the one to witness stonathan making goo-goo eyes at each other and she's like. you know what. this Might Actually solve 90% of my problems. so SHE'S the one who prompts them into it. but to be completely honest all three of them are so completely dramatic about everything so i could even see it all coming down to robin and maybe argyle to force them to get their shit together 😆

this is honestly just one way that it could go down, i've read a lot of different iterations and i love them all.

[hellonpluto]

Spider-Man 2 (2004) during-the-movie notes!!! Goofy shit under the cut :]

Spider-Man 2 notes

-once again whipping out the banger intro sequence, this time with more colors being used and better transitions

-peter!!! Ur fuckin late peter!!! Gahd.

-pizza ....

-broom closet scene is so silly

-boyfail pt 2

-pizza time(you can kill me)

-pizza time again bc oughhhhh pizza time

-pizza ROLL time in a minute actually(gonna make pizza rolls)

-"ill give you 150." "300." "Thats outrageous! Done."

-desk lady is now nicer! Yay!

-osborn would be proud. He would

-OCTAVIUS???? who's octavius

-"..ben? Oh, peter..." aunt MAYYYYYYYY

-is 20 dollars alot? What year is this set in. Am i stupid

-when peter knocked on the restroom door my dog perked his head up like "huh? What?"

-peter is getting shat on in this one. Like what the fuck

-"eeehhh rosie i love this boy!"

-this movie is making my inner 'getting shit done' want to beat peter up. Reduce time as spiderman, or try and encourage others to be better. Sit down, set a timer for 2 hours to get college work done. Then work. Bud.

-run past the evil landlord guy

-get those carnations for yo NOT GIRL

-"how'd you do that?" "Uh.. work out, plenty of rest. Yknow, eat ur green vegetables?" "Thats what my mom is always sayin'! I just never actually believed her!"

-pider man.....

-🤨 towards street lady

-i honestly think the older suit looks cool

-spiderman. In elevator

-its giving elevator scene from neon genesis

-holy shit its so awkward

-doculous oculous. In the house

-mans could just admit he wanted to wear a fucked up corset but ok

-bro is just showing off his evil lair crap n nobody bats an eye

-"the power of the sun... in the palm of my hand." Girl ok slay

-system unstable? More lik... system of a down

-"he humiliated me by touching me." He saved yo life harry

-horror movie ass scene in the surgery room

-lowkey fire tho

-they act like pet snakes

-"dr. Strange. Thats good! Its already in use."

-dr octopus....

-bro i love how they did the arms. They're so cool

-cool ass doc ock shot

-what the fuck

-shoutout to aunt may for stopping the guy from stealing

-eating the cinematography up rn

-aunt may slaying in this movie, actually

-let peter rest!!!! Let that man sleeep!!!!!

-newspaper man is best character ngl

-peter caught fumbling part a billion

-harry. Wtf. Thats ur lover

-beeber barker loses powers

-bro is just peter parker

-this is so fuckjng sad what

-he did his homework!!!! Yay!!!

-"peter. Im getting married." Ive heard that before

-spiderman no more...

-doc ock

-sorry its 12 am

-pov u save little girl from fire but someone else dies

-mystery girl is so cute

-chocolate cake break

-do a flip!!!!!

-"my back!!! Ough ... my back....."

-why is she recreating the upside-down kiss with her fiance 😭😭😭

-mj knows. I think

-peter pick a fuckin struggle

-please

-oml

-peter looks like he has more lip gloss on than mj

-doc ock is def trans

-anyways

-Doc ock? More like. Do cock

-ANWYAYS

-"did he just grab his BOOBS??" (rewinds a bit) "oh no its just his shoulders... ok"

-THE TRAIN SCENE OMG

-"He's... just a kid"

-OUFGHHH

-"we wont tell nobody."

-HOOPLAHHH

-"HE'S MINE!!" Man what

-"run!" Proceeds to stand there

-doc ock is so cool man

-ew i forgot mj exists

-MB MB MB

-"i will not die a monster." BANGER AFTER BANGER AFTER BANGER

-doc ock niooooo.... NOOOOOO

-harry wtf

-mj runs away from wedding! Everyone is disappointed!

-"cant you respect me enough to make my own decision?" Girl respect his. He doesnt want u to get hurt, dingus

-WHAT

-ew

-ew. Ew

-ugh

-blue eyes white dragon(pt 2)

-banger ending song version of the amazing spiderman song

-good movie!!! 8-9/10. Rlly good!!

[loveoaths]

new mandalorian episode thoughts:

finally, cameos i care about! (outside of andor)

wish jack black and lizzo had fucked on screen for 30 minutes though

din saying "handy" made me laugh. his dialogue has always been dumb as hell but handy really got to me this week

shoutout to the old man sleeper cell agent for a political party that hasn't existed in 40 years. gotta love his tenacity!

love that a dude can release murder nanobot droids and his punishment is to hang his head real low and do a slow walk of shame off to private exile on a moon somewhere! like unironically i do love that because fuck prison, but also watching him mope off like a kid who got told he gets no dessert tonight was stupid as hell. A+ all around

it's becoming more and more annoying to me that grogu didn't get to stay with luke, because he serves zero function in the narrative right now. this season would feel more balanced if the story was split into three: din helping bo retake mandalore; luke training grogu; and moff gideon's schemes spreading corruption and and dissent throughout the new republic. as a triad, din's absence from his own scenes would feel less jarring because we would be balancing two other stories, grogu and luke's characters would be expanded on and become plot relevant again as grogu's powers advanced, and more seeds of intrigue about gideon's plans could be spread without dropping 30 minutes of pershing bullshit into a single episode, which i am still flabbergasted about

this really really should be bo katan's own show (i get why that isn't possible etc etc) and sometimes it annoys me that it isn't, because while a good creative team could have made this show a two-fisted hand-off from din to bo that didn't feel jarring, this creative team is not that. so it still feels off to me personally to tune in knowing i will see din for all of 5 minutes in an episode

however i am enjoying bo katan's story. i just wish din wasn't relegated to audience surrogate / question asker so bo can exposit / be cool. because even the action shots / din action moves are reduced and bo katan takes the spotlight for fights even when it would fit din's character just as much to make certain moves / take a fight highlight, but also because this series is now about setting her up as a redeemed action heroine figure, it makes sense why they are shifting focus in everything to her. still feels not right though. i hope they at least find smoother transitions into her focus scenes because right now it's just. not the best. and imo people would respond to her better if her narrative was seen more as assisted by/woven into din's, rather than her suddenly taking his place in the narrative, which is what i suspect the anti-bo fans are actually upset over. trick people into thinking they want the same thing as you do, and they will. but the season's structure so far has done the opposite of that, which is bothering people, which is bothering me because i have to see those people complain about her all over my dash

fix the season for me and me alone favreauni. thank u.

[mirandamckenni1]

Corrie Yee: Beauty, Brains & Business When you need extra confidence in the bedroom, BlueChew is there! Try it for FREE when you use our promo code HOLLY at checkout - just pay $5 for shipping! https://bluechew.com/ The newest Penthouse Pet has arrived! Corrie Yee tells Holly about her transition into n u d e modeling after a decade-long career, then they swap stories about sketchy photographers through the years. Corrie gives tips for growing your Instagram, declares the perfect p e n I s length, and explains why she’s looking for daddy vibes. Plus - she reveals the shocking mind behind her “P e n i s PDF” filled to the brim with d I c k data! SHOW NOTES: :41 introducing Corrie 1:49 how she got into modeling and nude modeling 3:59 why she chose Las Vegas over NYC or LA 4:51 what she loves about modeling 5:30 if she’s had any bad modeling experiences 6:30 why Holly’s mom didn’t want her to model 11:27 their penthouse shoot together 18:46 fake Playboy spinoffs 20:30 print version of Penthouse 21:37 the moment when she realized she had “arrived” 22:45 what she says to people who think Instagram modeling is not a real job 23:57 tips to grow your Instagram 25:18 accidentally posting her nude on Instagram 27:02 how she accidentally found the secret to go viral 28:47 cat calls and if they work 33:35 her ideal penis size 41:57 bad experience with agencies 43:32 starting her own agency 45:10 if she’s the same in person as online 46:05 what’s on her OF 46:43 fans who cross boundaries 50:00 holly’s modeling lesson 51:57 what people would be surprised to learn about her 54:44 her experience dating in the industry 56:21 her ideal guy 1:00:23 if she wants a family 1:05:30 social shoutouts Want more from this podcast? Get access to tons of perks by joining my Patreon! We have exclusive bonus content such as live streams of our interviews, early releases, exclusive Q&As, access to my fine art photography and video, plus so much more! Join our community now at Patreon.com/hollyrandallunfiltered via YouTube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BYBUzOfOXe0

[mdverse]

rating the glee kids based on how easy it was to animate them

finn: 9/10

-1 bc i kept underestimating how long his part was and had to go back and add more frames at least once

all of the frames were pretty similar and tbh that was simultaneously a blessing and a curse

britt: 10/10

im a britt apologist, she can do no wrong to me, so she's the only one whose bopping around did not cost her any points

honestly the best person to get me started experimenting with smear frames here! i love her

-1 bc these aren't my best britt drawings (sorry babe)

+1 bc she somehow managed to look cute in her transitions from finn and to puck. i didn't think that was possible. who else is doing it like her <3

puck: 2/10

did not need to be moving that much. sir pls stop why were u whipping ur head around like that

also the mostly bald head keeps tripping me up but that's just a general puck thing

mike: 7/10

pretty quick, pretty easy! no complaints there he is vv cute and it's nice to draw him more

rachel: 1/10

i was feeling pretty neutral about her for a while but i'm back to hating her just bc of this

i can draw her from one angle only so everything else was a nightmare and i learned to draw her out of sheer spite

she was singing the "it's tough for you to get by" part so a. i had to sync her mouth to the words and b. it felt like a personal attack 😔 yes it was tough rachel thank u for rubbing it in

every time i thought i was done with her i had to go back and add more frames and i was seething about it

mercedes: 5/10

still not used to drawing her so genuinely who knows if the resemblance is there or not

very short segment for her tho so i suppose it could've been much worse? but i don't love what i did

sam: 8/10

so little screentime (literally 4 frames rip samuel)! quick and easy, i have to appreciate that

the hair transition from mercedes to sam was so fun actually

kurt: 9/10

literally the same :D expression the entire time! adorable <3

rory: 5/10

i have never drawn this man in my life and i may never do it again (not an insult)

santana: 9.5/10

the "go girl give us nothing" lack of movement in her shoulders is everything to me

thank u for making my life easier and looking flawless the entire time ily queen

-0.5 but only bc i got really sad the entire time i was drawing her and tbh that's not her fault in the slightest

also shoutout to her for getting The Best frame in this entire animation??

quinn: 4/10

listen usually i like drawing quinn but this was a struggle

miss ma'am did not need to be tipping her head up and down like that :(

honestly i did my best but ive definitely drawn much better quinns than these

artie: 3/10

by this point i was ready to commit murder this lil fucker would not stop moving and i wanted to cry

why. what was the point of all that. he was doing the most like his part wasn't already The Longest by a lot

every time i thought i might be getting close to the end i realised i was wrong. genuinely so emotionally devastating u don't understand

he earned himself points back tho bc i drew so many good arties and im proud of that. growth babey <3

[holllandtrash]

Congrats on 3K followers! Very much deserved. I'm a new follower and was curious to know the story behind your blog (how long youve had it for and how you started out/transitioned into f1) only if you want to share your story of course (:

sit down and get some popcorn babes, here is my life story

Back story, I’ve been writing fanfiction since 2011, I started on quotev (If anyone remembers that) and it was solely 1D fanfics also i was way too fcking young to be writing fanfiction

I started this blog in like mid 2016 and it was mainly an mcu blog (cough cough Tom Holland/Peter Parker) and I wrote a lot of one shots and more on here, but that where the name ‘holllandtrash’ comes from :’)

I took a break from writing fanfic from like mid 2018-2020 bc I started school, moved across the country, dropped out of school, moved back home, went back to school, thought I was in love yadda yadda but I sort of fell out of writing during that time or if I did write, I would never post it

Oh but what happened in 2020 ??? Pandemic !!!! AND the 10 year anniversary of one direction so I actually started to get back into 1d fanfic writing (didn’t post any of it) but I fell back in love with fanfiction while I was stuck at home

I also fell in love w Harry Potter again and then I started a wattpad like mid 2020 and wrote a few HP fics on there that are horribly long and one of them isn’t even completed yet BUT that was most of my 2021, hp, tik tok, wattpad and school

That leads me to falling in love with F1 early in 2022 (I’m a new fan) and honestly for the entirety of last year I was still writing my Harry Potter fics, (shoutout to Elusive & Burn) I was in school up until May, had a full time job after that (still have it), broke up w my ex 💅 decided to save up to move across the world (still working on that part) but everything was going good up until December of 2022

I stopped writing because Christmas is always chaotic for me and my family and work was stupid busy and i was planning a 3 week trip for January and then I got back from that trip and suffered from a burst fucking eardrum of all things so I couldn’t work and i was stuck at home I was lonely and had no motivation

And then one day in February, still with the HP fanfic on hold bc I just couldnt bring myself to write it, I decided to log onto my good ol tumblr and what do I see but some F1 stuff and I’m like oh this is lovely (bc the season hadn’t started yet and i missed the drivers) and one of the first things I saw was a social media au and I was like hey wait…I could do that...

So I did and the Pierre smau (worlds collide) was my first ever piece of f1 writing- if you can even call it that, but then I was hooked. I stuck with the smau’s for the most part for the first few weeks but it was a really good transition to actually writing one shots and eventually back into chaptered fics

I wish I had liked or reblogged that first social media au I saw because it really jump started me back into writing after taking almost three months off

anyway now I am writing when I can, splitting my time between Tumblr and trying to write a real book. My Harry Potter fic on wattpad is still on hold and I would like to go back to it but it’s hard. But this platform really pushed me to just focus on what i love and all of the kind and supportive messages from followers like you remind me why I love to write, I want to write for other people, I want people to feel the things that I feel, even if just for a short amount of time

i'll try to publish a book one day but man writing is fucking hard so who knows

if u made it this far, thank u for reading all of this xoxo

[fayes-fics]

Favorite stories of yours? How much time do you have... Because I love A LOT for a lot of different reasons 💙

Stories that made me clutch my pearls and realize I was your adoring fan:

Kinktober Gags

Kinktober Frottage

Sonnet #29

Tell Me

The re-read spank bank:

Waking Up

Lessons (all of them, but especially the first one)

Temptation/Innocence (all of them, for real, each one)

Riding Tandem

Transitions

The Right Answer

Driven To Distraction

Revelation

A Helping Hand

The ones that shine like precious little jewels in my heart because they are so beautiful:

Somewhere Only We Know

The Things We Do For Love

Portrait

(Be)Longing

Our Cottage

Absolutely amazing little gifties that I will always hold so dear:

Cravats (seriously, how dare you be so amazing?)

Double Bind

The one that broke my fking brain and made me want to be impregnated, thank god it's by a fictional man:

Moments - Ladder Interlude

And just a general shoutout to your 2k celebration fics, esp the Anthony smut ones because GODDAMN they were all TOP TIER HOT. Idk what was in your Coke Zero that weekend, but you brought straight fire. 🥵

ELEANOR!!! 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹😭😭😭😭😭

I 🫶 U. Stopppppppp

I don’t even know what to say except…. You’re the best and I’m speechless. I’m so glad you like so many. I’m very lucky to have a talented generous mutual friend like you. I’m a lucky lady 🥹🥹🫶🫶🫶

[picrossingguard]

Alrighty!!! So I was tagged by @berrymeter and @rainevybes

rules: tag 10 ppl u want to get to know better

relationship status: qpr polycule ehehe (I have 1 partner but like transitive property or whatevs)

favorite color: Alright, so I absolutley love green in all forms, but if I have to pick one, I would say a nice sage green with a neon lime toxic slutch green in close second. (Also shoutout to red and purple for honorary mentions)

song stuck in my head: People are People by Depeche Mode

last song i listened to: Pocketful of Sunshine by Natasha Bedingfield (off of one of my character playlists <3)

three favorite foods: Chicken Mole (just ate some and it was fucken delicious as always), Carbonara (the kind with the eggs, while I do enjoy the cream one, the egg one is so special to me), Chicken or Lamb Biryani (these are the first that came to mind but I love so many types of food my top favorites change so often)

last thing i googled: looked up where Potomac was since I was watching a video and they mentioned the Real Housewives of Potomac

dream trip: Well, I mean aside from a massive trip to go see all of my friends across the US and in other countries, I would absolutely love to take a trip to Korea and stay with a host family, be able to practice and improve my Korean skills, get better at cooking Korean food, and just see everything from the natural beauty to participating in everyday activities. Some runners up are Finland to see the Northern Lights and vibe out in some saunas and getting to see some cool underground catacombs, caverns, and the massive cisterns like in Istanbul.

anything i want rn: Getting high w/ and kissing a boy (or several), Having a tea party with all my friends, A good night’s rest, A nice thermos with a tea infuser, Motivation to respond to my RPs, Ice cream, Some cool clothes (maybe some different goth stuff and other stuff I can feel both powerful and sexy in, especially if it involves an exposed midriff and/or a tiddy window), An eyeshadow palette so I can branch out with my makeup and use more colors, More scrunchies, Several kisses, Going out to a 24-hour diner at 3am with friends, Sharp teeth, Glowing eyes, Horns perhaps, Hanging out with my partner and cook and cuddle and see them in person again, My brain fog and lethargy to go away, A good rice cooker, More kisses, Holding hands with someone, and I’ll just end it there because I could go on for a while.

Okay, now let’s get this bread gamers and tag some of the besties, trying not to tag people I already know have been tagged ehehe: @mxdice @taffy-glitch @junior-spacejunk @tonyoso @anemptyaquarium @lemmmmmmmmmmonade @chirpchangeling @wariolandiv @krispyjb @snow-points

[citrispace]

how long have you done digital stuff! very envious of your skillz

Hi, thank you so much!!! I got my first (and still current LMAO) drawing tablet back in 2014 and I've done digital art pretty steadily since then!

[nat-20s]

Wonderful! Au Part 6 <3. This one takes place IMMEDIATELY after part 5, so I’d recommend reading that one first if u haven’t or else it’s kind of nonsense. Another non episode exploratory bit babey.

~*~

The second that Martin stops the recording, they move in tandem. They remove their headphones, lean back in their chair, and let out something that’s more of a sigh than a word. “Fuck.”

Jon scrubs a hand over his face, while Martin simply stares at the message containing the shoutout. The following silence hangs in the air with a density that makes breathing feel like more effort than it's worth. When the atmosphere makes the transition from 'cloying' to 'actively suffocating', Martin blinks himself out of his trance and asks, "Did you...did you ever look them up? I mean, not when we we first got Here, obviously, but, after?"

Considering his answer, Jon twists his wedding ring back and forth. As far as nervous ticks go, it's by far Martin's favorite, because of the involvement of the aforementioned wedding ring. He'd, however, prefer that Jon wasn't nervous, and hopes that whatever nerves are present are more due to the inaccurate but nonetheless present feeling that they've been contacted by a dead man rather than because he's reading anything accusatory in Martin's question. Instead of answering, Jon asks, "Did you?" which means yes, but he's trying to gauge the direction of this conversation.

Trying to be reassuring despite the fact that he's currently, to put it lightly, considerably freaked out right now, Martin shakes his head. "No. Not for, um, lack of curiosity. I looked for us, first, and when I couldn't find anything, I just sort of assumed that..that none of them were out there either."

"Hmm. There is a logic to that line of thinking."

Martin lets out a weak laugh, and clasps his hands together to stop the shaking he now notices. "Thanks, love, but I think it was more avoidance than logic. That first year we were here was, uh, tumultuous? I think I would've done something, er, inadvisable if I had found any of the other online."

Sucking his teeth, Jon tells him, "I nearly sent out what would've been very confusing emails myself, but other than a quick perusal of public social media accounts years ago, I haven't interacted with any of them."

"Until now."

"Yes. Until now."

They both glance at the shout out, pixels seeming to burn into the screen, before glancing away. Martin opens and closes his mouth a few times before getting out, "Would you be willing to tell me? About- about what you found?"

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. It's gonna bother me now, and I'd rather hear it from you than from facebook or, or whatever."

"Basic rundown from about 3 and half years ago? Tim, as you saw, is still at the publishing house. At the time, Danny had taken up pottery, though has likely moved on from that interest since. Sasha is a cyber security expert and had adopted some ferrets recently. Melanie and Georgie still cohost What the Ghost as a youtube show, though it's significantly lighter in tone than Ghost Hunt Uk ever was. Basira, unfortunately, still works for the police, and I couldn't find an Alice or Daisy Tonner on social media that matched ours. Elias Bouchard, presumably not taken over by a certain dead bastard-"

"-rip in piss, you stupid fuck-"

"-may his memory be scorched from the earth and as insignificant as the worm he was, is the head of some prep school. Not a thrilling indictment for the next generation of Britain, but also not something I felt any particular need to get involved in. Did that, um, help things?"

"I..think so? I..it was easier, to act as if none of them were in this reality, but I can't really do that anymore, huh? So, yeah, it's nice..it's nice to know those basics. Raises a few..general existential questions that I don't want to get into right now, maybe, but. Yeah. Okay."

Grabbing one of Martin's hands and kissing the knuckles, Jon replies an infinitely soft, "Okay."

After delivering a deeply besotted smile, Martin adds on, "Still don't know what the hell to do about Tim messaging us."

With a sigh, Jon tells him, "I don't think we do anything. It's just a nice show of support from a fan who happens to resemble someone we miss. Good lord, could you imagine? You send a bit of money to some podcasters you do not know, and they respond by telling you they're so glad you're alive, and also, how's your mental health, and do you have a personal vendetta against clowns, because they're concerned. Utterly ridiculous. Plus..plus no one deserves to be looked at as a ghost, which..is probably the only thing we'd be able to see him as."

Martin blows air through his lips and concedes. "Christ. That sucks. You're right, but it sucks."

A beat passes, then Martin adds, "We're never doing liveshows."

Jon lets out a sharp bark of a laugh that helps re-establish the jovial mindset they try to record with. "Hard agree. Back to the episode?"

"Back to the episode."

[dcbnam-aep]

Star Trek picard 209 thoughts:

- once again here for the agnes content in the episode recaps and alison pill getting to narrate the ‘last time on…’

- still not over how rios brought his new crush and her son to a ship that’s about to be attacked by the borg, not his smartest choice

- kinda sad seven is referring to the borg queen as jurati tho, out of everyone she should understand the most that agnes isnt rlly agnes

- oohhh dead borg?

- ok the changing clothes thing was cool

- ALISON PILL IS AN ACTUAL GENIUS THIS PERFORMANCE IS ALREADY AMAZING AND SHES ONLY SAID LIKE 2 LONES

- shoutout to the cinematography crew, im already rlly liking the vibes and the shot of everyone transporting in amongst the vineyards was very pleasing

- *opening credits*

- ok but now suddenly they’re all together i though the ships transporter was offline??

- ACTUAL AGNES MY LOVE

- MORE AGNES BORG QUEEN MINDSPACE WITH BOTH OF THEM BICKERING MY FAVOURITE SCENES

- ‘trash dump of a mind’ lol even AI cant organise their files and thoughts

- lonely ahhhhh

- ayyy agnes genius is definitely not an idiot pop off

- OMG NEW HOLOGRAM AND ELNOR I LOVE THIS EPISODE ALREADY

- ACTUAL AGNES AND HOLO ELNOR TEAM UP AGAINST THE BORG SO GOOD

- forgot how much I loved actual agnes like ahhh bestie is so smart and considerate and HUMAN and ahhh I’ll say it again Loml

- the switch to baby picard was at the worst time I was getting so invested and excited

- haven’t decided whether I’d consider this mental health rep good or bad yet

- ok back in action love and also the transition was nice

- rios what are you doing ur gonna get someone killed- maybe yourself-

- oohhh that was some nice tech

- rios don’t be mad at least let her treat ur arm first

- completely removing rios from the core of the episode AGAIN *sigh*

- why did Tallinn lowkey look evil in that shot tho

- Soong is so… Soong

- I predicted that shift back into the past ngl

- why do I want to play hide and seek with young picard now?

- ok at least Seven is not in the white top so we’re not at risk of her being killed YET

- The green beam thing made me jump

- the green beam thing made me jump AGAIN

- ok and then what was meant to be the jump scare didn’t make me jump

- gfs who kill borg together stay together 🥰🌈

- kudos to the picard child actor cause he’s doing a rlly good job

- i like the lighting giving dnd vibes

- Raffi bandaging up Seven 🥰🌈 (clexa parallel)

- the white shirt underneath the white shirt underneath the white shirt underneath ahhhh

- don’t forget the ice pick

- ‘we’re not getting out of this’ ‘no, probably not’ IF THIS IS FORESHADOWING I SWEAR TO GOD-

- why they didn’t look for Elnor in the weapons area is beyond me like that’s highkey obvious-

- stop with the rios flirting scenes ndjhfhf agnebal 4 life ✋😫

- damn it Soong also being a genius and working the hidden door out

- i predicted the ‘like me’ owch- I feel so so bad for the mum she just needs some help and truly does care for Picard

- ahhh now im invested in the young picard storyline cause I wanna know what happened to the mum but at the same time I want them to go back to agnes out queening the borg queen

- ahh I missed Elnor’s accent

- ahhhh fake but not exactly fake reunion awwww

- ‘she’s still in there fighting the queen’ u bet she is

- Seven has no right to look that hot covered in blood

- core theme of this entire series- loneliness

- now the jacket is unbuttoned we’re slowly creeping towards her maybe death uurrgghhhh

- ayyy pop off seven

- would’ve been bad if they’d rematerialised not in the walls lol

- huh well that didn’t work

- the borg queen kinda slaying in agnes’ body means agnes has great fighting potential

- ahhh fuck and there’s the mortal injury noooo

- ‘love’ at least we’ve got it acknowledged on screen that seven and raffi love each other

- THE BLOOD IN THE SHAPE OF SEVENS BORG IMPLANTS THATS SO POWERFUL BUT ALSO OWCH

- GO AGNES FIGHT

- the borg queen confused at crying giving tpol energy

- sadness, loss, dispair- the things agnes is plagued with actually helping her fight the queen

- REPETITION FOR EMPHASIS AGNES JURATI IS THE LOML

- damnnnn go agnes gonna defeat the borg queen with some well-placed rambling

- ‘cant be sad forever’ agnes is gonna take that as a challenge lol

- throwing the queens words back at her

- agnes ready to save everyone who wants help awwww <3

- collect scraps and offer second chances

- ‘a real collected based not on assimilation but salvation’

- weakness can be strength go agnes keep preaching

- AGNES GONNA MAKE AN ACTUALLY GOOD BORG SYSTEM- USING THE BORG TO HELP

- muscly rios arms

- he’s gonna kiss her and leave anyway

- oop he kissed her

- aaannnddd he left

- wow prediction expert go me

- SAVE SEVEN NOW GO GO GO MERCIFUL BORGATI FOR THE WIN

- RAFFIS FACE AS SHE THINGS SEVENS DYING THO-

- boom

- *runs away* that would also be me

- GIVE AGNES CONTROL TO TALK TO SEVEN AND RAFFI PLS

- ‘becoming something new, something better’ IDC IF ITS BETTER I WANT OG AWKIES LOML CYBERNETICIST AGNES

- ah no the mum- i still haven’t decided if it’s good or bad rep, bit of both? at least it was dont somewhat sensitively? but not sensitively enough?

- not the slo-mo of the brick flying stop jsjjdjd

- and the crack sound why is it funny-

- Raffis adorable sigh at seven and her calling her extraordinary kskdjdj 🥰🌈

- ‘whoever you are now’ THE WAY THEY WONT EVEN CALL HER AGNES STOP

- I DONT KNOW HOW I FEEL ANOUT THIS YET

- PLS GIVE ME NORMAL AGNES FOR AT LEAST A LITTLE LONGER

- SHE NEVER GOT TO SAY GOODBYE TO RIOS-

- WHAT IF THEY JUST REMOVE HER FROM THE STORYLINE TO THE VERY END OF THE LAST EP NOOO

- ‘we’ve lost a friend’ THEYRE RLLY JUST GIVING HER UP LIKE THAT STOP-

- agnes leaving a final message for her wannabe father figure

- well they basically confirmed that agnes is the borg queen from ep 1

- final thoughts: I MISS OG AGNES ALREADY JSJJDJDJDJ

[mostlymaudlin]

happy to help. here's some asks: 11, 13, 31, U

thanks friend!!

11. Ever used the 'inspired by' ao3 function?

ha, yes i have thanks 2 u, queen of remixes!! ive written three -- two for remixfest/madness, and one just because im obsessed with @fatalfangirl hahaha

playing for keeps is a simon POV remix of part of @fatalfangirl 's football au playing the field

signs is a baz POV remix of @snowybank's fun watford get-together spider

approximately to infinity is a sci fi remix of @tea-brigade's football au always, almost. apparently i love to remix a football au lol

13. Most productive year (stats - years -wordcount)?

I started writing fanfic in earnest about a year ago, almost to the day (i'd published two random 1k one shots before then). since then, i've published a little over 200,000 words and written tons more. i hadn't realized that -- it's really cool to see :)

31. Beta or no beta? What do you ask betas to look for?

okay i go back and forth here!! i think i had a period where i was really nervous to post something without someone else's eyes on it, but the past few months i have not rly been doing betas. i often get my friends to read a google doc when i finish a first draft of something but mostly so they can pump me up hahaha.

my background in writing before fic was largely professional -- and to get better at that ive learned to love a scathing edit. but one thing im getting used to about fanfic is that i dont rly need to get better. nobody is measuring my performance except me. on the flip side, sometimes theres certain things i want to get better at -- right now im trying to get better at adding more of a sense of like ... ~mystery~/suspense to a story for the reader. (shoutout to @whatevertheweather, because her time loop au the space in between was a master class in this. and it made me be like: i want to be able to do this!!!). so @sillyunicorn is beta-ing a longer wip for me that im working on where im trying to do that, so that we can make sure it hits. but yes! my answer to this question is kind of in transition.

U) Check out author's pages or go back to tag search after reading a good fic?

im so chaotic about reading fics lol. i dont really do tag search! i operate mostly on recs people send me/i find in servers. but if i really really love an author i'll usually save the links to all their fics -- but i try not to binge author pages, because i like having new-to-me fics that i know i can get excited about.

from this ask meme