Sometimes I find myself thinking about Din Djarin a little too much that I get concerned and think that I really should go to therapy...
Well, I'm finally doing that (again) tomorrow... :)
Feeling pretty nervous about it but hoping that because I now know I'm autistic it will help me understand/explain things a little better! Hopefully this is the start of a journey to finally become a healthier, happier version of myself :)
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So here's what happened: I went in, panicked for 24 hours straight, cried so much the skin around my eyes is now red and raw, paced back and forth on the verge of screaming for help due to all the noises and all the people with no stop to it, and I dropped out and went home. I still want to stay sober, and I'm considering calling tomorrow to re-enroll in the outpatient so I can just go during the day and go home to my apartment at night
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7:49 PM EDT March 13, 2024:
Ze Malibu Kids - "Sleep Therapy"
From the album Sound It Out
(2002)
Last song scrobbled from iTunes at Last.fm
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My last bout of sleep paralysis (which was when I was recently hospitalized for nine days and getting no sleep because literally almost every half hour someone was waking me up for vitals or a blood drawl or to give me medicine or to prod my stomach or the attending bringing in the interns because I'm a great case study or because my infusion pump wanted to make obnoxious noises for no reason) was so horrific that when I told my therapist about it yesterday she visibly paled and freaked out on my behalf. Is that a good sign?
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Nerve pain is quite literally a nightmare, I hope you got the surgery and that it helped!
It is, I did, and it did! My microdiscectomy was performed laparoscopically and took less than 2 hours; later that same day, I was taking my first pain-free steps in over a year! I still have some nerve damage, but that pain is nothing compared to before.
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To @alisachik
Hey! Don't be so hard on yourself! We all have dreams, and as long as we keep going, they will accomplished. Don't EVER give up on what you want to succeed! NOTHING is ever a waste of time!!! You don't have to "act your age" everywhere! Just be you and do what makes you happy!!! Heck, I still act like a kid sometimes out in public! You don't have to follow what anyone says. (Unless it's the actual law.) Sometimes, do what your heart tells you. If it tells you to give up on your blog, I got nothing against that. But, sometimes, you just gotta be YOU. If I weren't me and followed my heart, well... I'd literally be dead on the floor right now...... So, follow what dreams you want to fulfill! It never mattered about age! It never mattered about peoples opinions! All that matters is BEING YOU. Life lesson, always have friends and family, but you don't always have to listen to them. (Again.) Just be you. Your blog is amazing! Your animations are amazing! And having people actually be them is amazing! Be yourself, not other people. (I feel like I repeated many things, but hopefully you get what I mean by all this)
From: @lill-cute-fluffy-devil
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