#smh. look at me. i'm so weak rn.

[veeples-archive]

6, 30, 43 PLEASE !!!!!!!!!! IM BEGGING

jade!!! <333 hello my love thank you for sending these in!!!

6. Who would beg the other not to leave? Who has to leave to protect the other?

I find it so hard to imagine Charlie OR Morgan begging for the other to stay 😭 I think it's probably mostly Morgan tempting Charlie to stay in bed which Charlie would gripe about, but always relents to anyway. On the flipside, if Charlie felt she really were too much of a liability she'd be the first to suggest she leave which I know Morgan would shut down immediately :/

30. Your OTP gets to pick out each other's outfits; what is each wearing?

LMAO oh boy, I think Charlie really liked that black button up from way back in book 1, I think she'd love to see Morgan in a nice button up (probably linen, since it's nice and breathable) and some sturdy pants instead of the jeans. Morgan might put Charlie in one of her backless dresses since Charlie has a nice slender neck and some defined back muscles.

43. Who would give their life for the other without a second thought?

Morgan, but Charlie would ream into her if she honestly tried or even suggested it :') Same issue she'll have with Nat smh but she really doesn't want or need anyone to die for her when she wants something to live for most of all.

Obligatory OTP Asks!!

[luna0713hunter]

Hellooo~

I just found your blog rn and I immediately fell in love with your works(especially sukuna ffs).

I love the way you write sukuna and reader's relationship.

And if ur ok with it, may I request a sukuna x reader angst? Maybe where reader is a sorcerer and she got badly injured and got into a almost death situation during a fight and sukuna is smh guilty for it??

You can ignore this if u want to<3

-🍪

Author's note : Hi hi ( ꈍᴗꈍ)oh my gosh im so happy to hear that!!!thank you so much darling!it makes me super happy

Mhm,i love the smell of fresh angst with happy ending in the midnight lmao. I'll gladly write it!! Hope you enjoy this,Cookie-chan!

Warnings : Sukuna Sorcerer au!,angst,injury and blood,happy ending!

*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘

You knew this would happen,and you were happy to rub it in your idiot boyfriend's face with a big "i told you so."

That is,if you make it out alive.

The curse before you lets out a loud noise, something akin to cackle,as it watches you with it's multiple eyes. You glare,but even you know it's lost all heat;with blood oozing out of each part of your body,you can barely even keep your eyes open. Your body feels weak,and all of your joints hurt like hell. Your eyes drift to where you broken phone is laying and you just hope that your help signal has gone through before it was damage for good.

"ah," you mumble as you spit a mouthful of blood on the ground below; watching as it drips down on your hands, "today sucks. Its all Ryo's fault."

Your hazy eyes turn up and you watch as the curse dances around;each one of it's disgusting eye spinning around wildly as it looks at you with glee.

The son of a bitch is having fun killing you.

"you're lucky, y'know," you giggle slightly from how slurred your words sound; the blood lose making you lightheaded, "If Ryo was here,he would've torn you to pieces. But, he's an idiot."

Because he really was; starting that morning with the message from the higher ups about your new mission, you had told Sukuna that it would end badly. You had told him more than twice that something smelled fishy;that the higher ups were out to get you. But Sukuna,had dismissed your worry,and with a small scoff had said you're paranoid. At least,now with you dead,he would be proven wrong.

You grin maniacally at the thought;serves him right.

Leaning your back against the tree,you watch with bleary eyes as the curse steps closer;you dont even care. You're too tired to fight back. So you just sit there, thinking about all the things you'll miss;your friends and family,that one bakery with those delicious coconut buns,your boyfriend Sukuna,and most of all-

"i never got the chance to hear him say i love you..."

Maybe out of everything, you'll regret not dating your boyfriend sooner.

You're so lost in your thoughts,that you dont notice the sound of the curse has been faded away. And when you hear a small shriek,and hurried footsteps running your way,you just close your eyes and drop your head. You're fully expecting the curse to rip out your heart,when gentle,but frantic hands,take hold of your bloody cheeks and raise your head slightly. With a pained groan,you open your eyes just enough to see a heap of pink,and a familiar pair of red eyes.

"Ryo...?"

"yeah,yeah babe. Its me," his voice is steady,like always,but you can hear a small undertone of worry and it brings a smile to your lips.

"told ya..."

The hands on your cheeks rub at the corner of your lips to wipe away the blood.

"yeah,i know. And I'm an ass for not believing you." You feel yourself shift,and with foggy mind, realize he has lifted you up in his arms, "I'll make it up to you. Promise."

You giggle and rub your head against his chest;his scent already soothing your mind.

"can i have those sweet buns then?with hot chocolate?"

"whatever you want. First, let's get you fixed up yeah?"

You mumble your agreement and close your eyes. And when you wake up the next time,its to a tray full of your favorite sweet buns and a warm mug of hot chocolate.

Your boyfriend embraces you tightly,and kisses your forehead.

"i love you."

And maybe getting almost killed,was worth it after all.

*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘

P.S : I love coconut buns and im currently craving some so i had to add them lmao.

[riooklee]

My NO's in Fanfiction !

TW: opinions

( Just to clarify, this post is ABSOLUTELY NOT made to offend anyone. Seriously, write whatever you want to write and have fun !! I'm just trying to find other people who share the same views as me, thank you<3 )

1) Turning a mlm/wlw ship into a straight ship.

Sorry, but this just gives me the biggest ICK. Literally makes me want to throw my phone out the window, smash my head against a wall and gouge my eyes out. LIKEE, tell me you're homophobic without telling me you're homophobic smh.

You may be thinking rn, "Rio, how do people turn em into straight ships?" WHEN THEY FKIN GENDERBEND ONE OF THEM.

I LITERALLY CRY WHENEVER I TRY TO LOOK FOR A TOMARRY FIC AND I SEE "Female Harry Potter" / "Female Tom Riddle". LIKE NOOOO??? WHY ARE U TURNING MY POOKIES INTO FEMALES... THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO BE A MLM SHIP. WHY R U MAKING IT STRAIGHT??? It's giving "homophobic" !!

P.S. I just wanted to say, NO I AM NOT TRANSPHOBIC. I know some of u lots might jump onto that conclusion. BUT I AM COMPLETELY AGAINST THAT BS.

Don't get me wrong, I'm alright w ppl genderbending characters! NOT WHEN ITS IN A MLM/WLW SHIP THO.

P.S. I know that I can just exclude those tags whenever looking for a fic, but..the thing is, some people DON'T EVEN TAG THAT IN THEIR FICS WHEN THEY TOTALLY SHOULD BE TAGGING IT.

2) Making characters act so OC.

Yes, I do know that it IS fanfiction, people can do whatever they want with the characters. BUT SOME OF THEM MAKE THEM SO OC-ish THAT I CANT EVEN RECOGNISE IF THIS IS THE SAME CHARACTER IM OBSESSED W AND LOVE.

Some people make Harry an "UwU" cutsie little silly guy, all soft, and totes a cute cinnamon roll that he's defenseless and weak that he needs big almighty strong 10-pack Tom to save him because he's too little to do stuff for himself >-< .

EW, ICK.

STOP MAKING HARRY A PICK ME. My guy fought a literal war and defeated the dark lord. So why, IN MERLINS NAME are YOU making him act like this:'((

LIKEE, where's my sassy, sarcastic silly guy?? :((

AND TOM. OH MY DAYSS, TOM. Y'all either make him too mean or too nice I SWEAR. Likee, mean as in would Avada u if u even say a single word to him. LIKE BRO, HE WAS A PREFECT AND HEADBOY. HE DIDNT BECOME SO BECAUSE HE AVADA 'D INNOCENT PEOPLE.

P.S. I'm talking abt teenaged Tom Riddles, Voldie would def kill innocent people ykwim?

Or nice as in would call u pookie wookie bear and cuddle u if u had a bad scary dream. Let's bffr rn.

LIKE, where's my crazy psycho nice silly guy??? DD:

IF U WANT THEM TO ACT SORT OF OC-ish PUT THEM INTO A SITUATION THAT'LL FORCE THEM TO ACT AS THOUGH. Seriously, some can get away w this behavior if it is played correctly!!

3) First Person POV.

Pretty self-explanatory, next.

4) "He growled"

Okay, alpha, remus wannabe, furry looking ahh.

JS STOP PLS, IT'S NOT ROMANTIC AND PPL DONT FIND IT ATTRACTIVE.

When I say "ppl" I'm talking abt myself.

[hinamie]

hi hina! in terms of your art, what would say is your strength(s) and what is your weakness?

!!!! omg ily mariam you're always so good at asking rly thoughtful questions that make me take a step back n Ponder,, tbh im not sure if this is just a Me thing or if every artist experiences this but i feel like my main strengths/weaknesses in my art are just reflective of the strengths/weaknesses i have in all areas of my life .., i am not going to unpack that too much tho smile :)

strength(s)

a bitch is Persistent !!! when I decide to learn how to do something i put in 200% to learning it and learning it Well . ths how i got good at drawing a lot of the things im told i'm "good" at --i did it with hands i did it with torso anatomy i did it with clothing ,, i did it with yuuji's gd hair,, the list goes on !! also i think this is maybe related to why i love making character reference sheets ? granted they take forever and i hate it while i'm in it but at the end of the day i am a proud character sheet Advocate. if u ever want to really hammer something into ur brain .. character sheets.... angles......just sayin ! shit works.......

character design listen i dont want to sing my own praises too much but character design rly is one of my favourite kinds of art to do and i think . im maybe a bit good at it.,, idk,... :3 fr though I put so much time and effort in2 the research and ref compiling and it takes Hours on pinterest and 543254 open tabs but finally getting to put the pieces all together to make something cohesive makes all the pain worth it . whether it's for an oc or an existing character i love designing outfits or alternate forms that Tell u something abt the character i love translating personality into clothing choices and silhouettes and colours and hiding little defining Traits and !!! idk i just have so much fun :'> it reminds me why i love art

weakness(es)

kind of the dark side of persistence, a bitch is Stubborn and Resistant to Change (not just an Artist Flaw(tm) but also a recurring Character Flaw i need to work on gsfdhjfsgd) . I find i don't know how to easily break habits or push myself outside of what's Worked for me in the past, even if i know that other, better ways exist ,,. like I joke abt working harder not smarter and complaining about it but that's not even a joke that's just what I do because I'm too afraid of being Bad at something or trying something and having it not work so I just stick to what I know :( smh if comfort zones r meant to b left why r they comfortable.......

perspective/rooms/dynamic poses,, look ik im microdosing on these rn but a lot of it is still so HARD ,, improvement jail.... :( unique poses r starting to come easier with reference but rooms i hate u . how do u make objects look like they are in a scene and not on it . how to give objects Weight ????? i dont get it...

[kithtaehyung]

RYEN HELLO OMG i'm finally here to scream in ur inbox about the window JFNDKFJNGK it's taken a minute bc i like to scroll through the chapter to make sure i don't forget anything and i can't stop re-reading it instead smh so first of all WHEN I TELL YOU MY JAW DROPPED WHEN I SAW THE TAGS omfg literally,,,, I DIDN'T EXPECT LIKE ANY OF THEM i was fr already a little feral and a little sweaty tbh. so u can imagine the whiplash when i start reading AND READER IS UPSET </3 but thank GOD for my queen dom <333333 always talking sense into reader!!! i am still literally screaming at her saying "make up with my future brother-in-law" LMAO AND EVEN THOUGH I KNEW THAT YOONGI WAS GOING TO SNEAK IN I STILL COULD NOT BELIEVE MY EYES WHEN I READ IT. i rlly love how this was "i'm yours and you're mine" but make it >:( lmao. yoongi said it best when he said "teach you to think i'm not yours. as if i don't wanna give you my shit so you can walk around everywhere with it on." SCREAMS (cut to yoongi giving reader HIS CHAIN kjgnkdjfgkjd i literally cannot stand it BUT OH MY GOD RYEN ALL THE SNEAKING AROUND GKJFKJGNDKJG literally saw my life flash before my eyes when bro came in and had to remind myself that This Is Not Real Life Please Breathe. literally every second bro wouldn't LEAVE i was just yelling in my head bc why are you here cockblocking. i love you please GET OUT. then i thought it was over AND NO??????? RYEN. look me in the eyes rn. hold my hands. ARE YOU KIDDING ME. HE KNOCKED ON THE WALL ??????? i can't complain too much bc cockwarming <3 BUT HELP. and vmin overhearing them when they think they're alone????????? dnkgjkjfdg i'm not strong enough to think too much about reader calling yoongi bitch and what happened right after. i am a weak weak person and you are so evil for making "you're gonna show me how you get off" yoongi GRAMMYS YOONGI. also bratty reader i am SCREAMING. like you're gonna call him bitch then disobey his orders????? "pass." ICON. talking about him being put in his place??? I WOULD PAY TO SEE IT. (also love how shy he was about it at the end gkjdnkfj like, sir, don't dish what you can't take. u wanna be punished a little, we get it, just say so) but it wouldn't be 3tan yoongi if he wasn't constantly checking in and taking care of reader </3 like when reader thought they heard smth and he said he was watching </3 when he thought they were in subspace and wanted to check </3 idk smth about it made me </3 </3 he's so </3 </3 i would like to end this off by saying i've never read so much smut i wish i could reenact. WHICH REMINDS ME. YOU'RE TELLING ME??? PEOPLE ARE OUT HERE USING 3TAN AS INSPO FOR THINGS TO DO WITH THEIR PARTNERS??? oh i'm so sick THAT SHOULD BE ME. like i'm glad for u but also jealousy is a disease and i'm SICK. anyways, i'm glad you took your time with it!! it was (as always) worth the wait and i'm p sure i say this every time but perhaps this is my new favorite part???? it's got it all. angst, fluff, communication, their friends, yoongi being sweet, yoongi being a menace, i would keep going but the list will get so long and this is already. A LOT and i don't want tumblr to eat it!!! -loona anon MWAH

LOONA OMFGGGG HI BABE gonna put this under a cut bc it's time to scream back!

WHEN I TELL YOU MY JAW DROPPED WHEN I SAW THE TAGS omfg literally,,,, I DIDN'T EXPECT LIKE ANY OF THEM i was fr already a little feral and a little sweaty tbh. so u can imagine the whiplash when i start reading AND READER IS UPSET </3 but thank GOD for my queen dom <333333 always talking sense into reader!!! i am still literally screaming at her saying "make up with my future brother-in-law"

LMFAOOO i told y'all the warnings were already enough to make me sweat!! and look where we ended up. i don't think anyone knew the extent of my truth there ahahaha. but also, reader baby is upset?? who do i fight oh we're fighting yoongi</333 tragic.

LMAO AND EVEN THOUGH I KNEW THAT YOONGI WAS GOING TO SNEAK IN I STILL COULD NOT BELIEVE MY EYES WHEN I READ IT. i rlly love how this was "i'm yours and you're mine" but make it >:( lmao. yoongi said it best when he said "teach you to think i'm not yours. as if i don't wanna give you my shit so you can walk around everywhere with it on." SCREAMS (cut to yoongi giving reader HIS CHAIN kjgnkdjfgkjd i literally cannot stand it

HAHAHA yes. yoongi managing to surprise us even though his threat about going through a window is right there in writing.... we are the whole circus!! but yeah both of them were just so upset and adorable and i can't stand them actually?? lol.

BUT OH MY GOD RYEN ALL THE SNEAKING AROUND GKJFKJGNDKJG literally saw my life flash before my eyes when bro came in and had to remind myself that This Is Not Real Life Please Breathe. literally every second bro wouldn't LEAVE i was just yelling in my head bc why are you here cockblocking. i love you please GET OUT. then i thought it was over AND NO??????? RYEN. look me in the eyes rn. hold my hands. ARE YOU KIDDING ME. HE KNOCKED ON THE WALL ??????? i can't complain too much bc cockwarming <3 BUT HELP.

the bro interruptions were honestly so FUN to write i was cackling and crying the whole time!! like how does this man know exactly when to ruin a good time his comedic timing was gd hilarious. the fact that you had to take a breath to remind yourself it's not real is so cool?? wtf that's a huge compliment! and the double down is my absolute favorite bc it led to super cute moments :((( but was HORRIFYING when it started happening ahahahaha

and vmin overhearing them when they think they're alone????????? dnkgjkjfdg i'm not strong enough to think too much about reader calling yoongi bitch and what happened right after. i am a weak weak person and you are so evil for making "you're gonna show me how you get off" yoongi GRAMMYS YOONGI. also bratty reader i am SCREAMING. like you're gonna call him bitch then disobey his orders????? "pass." ICON. talking about him being put in his place??? I WOULD PAY TO SEE IT.

I WANT BOTH OF THEM LET ME IN COACH IM SLIDING DOWN THE WALLS BANGING ON THE DOORS. i want vmin too but that's a different story lol. but gOD reader in this was an icon a king a queen a god a goddess all of the praise. to be like that in front of grammys yoongi telling you to show him that? i dunno how reader got the words out lmfao. but the adrenaline rush must have been a huge boost to confidence levels.

(also love how shy he was about it at the end gkjdnkfj like, sir, don't dish what you can't take. u wanna be punished a little, we get it, just say so) but it wouldn't be 3tan yoongi if he wasn't constantly checking in and taking care of reader </3 like when reader thought they heard smth and he said he was watching </3 when he thought they were in subspace and wanted to check </3 idk smth about it made me </3 </3 he's so </3 </3 i would like to end this off by saying i've never read so much smut i wish i could reenact.

PLEASE. YOU GET IT. yoongi being a fcking menace in the control seat but we all know what he wants to see!! he isn't slick at all omfg i'm so sjfjddjks if we ever get to reader's turn? it's over. it's over for everyone involved i may need 28 business days to get through it lol. but yoongi was an absolute sweetheart here. he was mad! he was pissed! but that didn't mean he was gonna disregard the basics like wellbeing and awareness. he knows how to hold himself back and that puts reader in a wonderful position.

WHICH REMINDS ME. YOU'RE TELLING ME??? PEOPLE ARE OUT HERE USING 3TAN AS INSPO FOR THINGS TO DO WITH THEIR PARTNERS??? oh i'm so sick THAT SHOULD BE ME. like i'm glad for u but also jealousy is a disease and i'm SICK.

HAHAHAHA YES LOONA. THERE REALLY ARE PEOPLE OUT HERE DOING JUST THAT AND IM LIVING FOR ITTTT. if i could send you a 3tan yoongi i most definitely would</33

anyways, i'm glad you took your time with it!! it was (as always) worth the wait and i'm p sure i say this every time but perhaps this is my new favorite part???? it's got it all. angst, fluff, communication, their friends, yoongi being sweet, yoongi being a menace, i would keep going but the list will get so long and this is already. A LOT and i don't want tumblr to eat it!!!

i'm screaming?? if this is your new fave part?? hell yeah. that makes me happy bc i didn't think this was on the same level of quality as the others! but if you like it then i'm very satisfied. and you got a point about it having a bit of everything! it's not a holiday special for nothing ehehehe. thank you so much again babe. this made me smile and laugh today LOL ily!

[acaiasahi]

୨✩୧ ۫ 🍞𓈒 ⭒ ݁ . TNX REACTS! the one where you confess to them

SYNOPSIS: the new six's reaction to you confessing your feelings for them.

INFO: fluff, nonidol!tnx x gn!reader, 969 words

WARNINGS: profanity, jokes, let me know if there are any! grammatical + structural errors, lowercase + smaller text intended, proofread-ish!

NOW PLAYING ✧ BEAUTIFUL.

WOO KYUNGJUN! — 우경준.

✩ three words: awkward as fuck.

✩ you don't take it the wrong way if he's silent, i mean that was one of the many reasons as to why you started liking him.

✩ it's not like he doesn't like you back, bc trust me... he definitely does, but he just doesn't know how to react.

✩ when you confess, you're kinda walking around the subject until you finally say something and that's when kyungjun reacts.

✩ cuts you off just to ask, "wait... you like me?!" and you kinda give him the deadpan face that says 'bro wtf i literally just said that i like you... wtf are you even on?'

✩ you have to verbally say it one more time bc he thinks he's dreaming but when you laugh at his wide eyes and dropped jaw... bro is on the floor crying with snot bubbles bc he thinks you're absolutely breathtaking.

✩ "i really like you, kyungjun. can you say something?", "are you free anytime soon?" :3

CHOI TAEHUN! — 최태훈.

✩ acts like a fool bc he's overwhelmed at the fact that you like him.

✩ def tries his hardest to keep his cool n look all swag for you but his emotions take over and can't help but smile upon hearing you confess to him.

✩ fr tones you out for a sec when you're still confessing and straight up rambling... and it kinda makes you sad bc... hello? earth to taehun?

✩ takes him a solid minute to realize that he's just staring at you and not saying anything so he tries to speak up but then...

✩ "y'know it's all good if you don't feel the same, i just needed to get it off my chest!" yeah... you said that with literal tears threatening to fall but crying is for the mf WEAK (just playin bc i cry like a damn faucet...)

✩ kinda just stands there bc he swears that if he makes any sudden movements, you're set to be running for the hills (... erm... okay...) but he ultimately speaks up.

✩ "nonono! i like you too, y/n. like... a lot!" was it as swag as he wanted to be... no... but did your smiling face and twinkling eyes looking up at him make him feel like the swaggiest? hell yeah bro!

JANG HYUNSOO! — 장현수.

✩ loud as fuck bro... literally running laps around you, arms flailing, tears streaming down... homie hitting a victory lap rn!!!

✩ kinda catches you off guard bc... erm... where are you going?

✩ it's obvious that he likes you back but you wanna hear it from him to just confirm.

✩ so when he comes back to you, literally out of breath with sweat dripping (fr dawg?? 😕), you quickly ask him if he likes you back.

✩ "so erm... do you... y'know...???", "what... like you back??? i thought i made it obvious??!??"

✩ "you literally ran around the whole school before i could even confess... so idk... you tell me bro"

✩ "i liTERALLT AM IN LOVE WITH YOU WHAT ARE YOU TALKINF ABOUT???!?!?"

✩ two idiots confessing their idiotic love for one another!!

CHEON JUNHYEOK! — 천준혁.

✩ super duper shy n doesn't know how to react at all.

✩ "o-oh, thanks, i guess?" is his response... out of all responses that you would say to your crush... that's the one he chose. smh.

✩ cue sad y/n... (i'm sorry for his stupidity) "ah, okay, sorry." and you walk away.

✩ takes junhyeok a good 24 hours to realize the damage he'd done especially when he noticed that you had been avoiding him the whole day.

✩ simply put: he fucked up big time and made it seem like he didn't like you back.

✩ literally had to corner you after school like some spy to finally get you to talk to him.

✩ is quick to explain everything that went through his brain when you had confessed. "y/n i really like you too, y-you just caught me off guard! and i'm so sorry i didn't say anything to you... you're just like super pretty so i don't really know how to function around you! and —"

✩ you have to kiss him to shut him up but hey! it works!

EUN-HWI! — 은휘.

✩ literally has no clue wtf is going on but is there for the ride!

✩ kinda just sits there, listening attentively and when the words, "i like you" come out... he's literally like ^0^?!?!?!!

✩ lots of "woah... really?" and dropped jaws but from your pov... he looks so cute, kinda like a kid at the aquarium, he's in awe staring at you.

✩ you get straight to the point after your confession, "so... d'ya like me back, hwi?" you fr used your big, glossy, sparkly, puppy dog eyes and got his ass wrapped around your finger more than he was before!

✩ "what kinda question is that? OFC I LIKE YOU?!???"

✩ both of you get super shy and kinda just stare at each other until he musters up all the courage in the world and grabs your hand, leaving school to walk you home even though he lives the opposite way... omg how cute </3

OH SUNGJUN! — 오성준.

✩ so cocky yet so... shy... how does he do it!!!

✩ is over the moon and multiple planets at the fact that you're literally confessing to him rn.

✩ probs the most normal-ish out of all the boys.

✩ likes the fact that he can make you blush with his words on the daily but the roles are reversed when you confess to him.

✩ blushing for absolute DAYS on end!

✩ lowkey thinking and planning of all the possible ways to take you out as soon as the words "i like you" come out.

✩ my boy's on a roll and literally suggests going out after school, probs to a café or of that same idea.

✩ uses corny lines like "did you fall when you came from heaven", or "are you a parking ticket? bc you got fine written all over you"

✩ two corny love-birds <3

٩(ˊ〇ˋ*)و ☆ tnx taglist! [ taglist form ] @kflixnet ... @ficscafe ... @enhacolor ... @alohajun ... @yogurteume

━ jaydi's notes! ୨✩୧ ۫ 📓𓈒 ⭒ ݁ . super busy n all that but hope this is good. see y'all till my next fic haha

© ACAIASAHI 2022 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. DO NOT COPY, TRANSLATE, OR REPOST UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES.

[6okuto]

Hcs for felix & mc during the time between CH 11 & 12?? 👀 what do u think they got up to,,,has felix been horny for mc the ENTIRE TIME??? WHAT ABOUT HIS DEPRESSION GIRL HELP IM SO SAD

— felix and mc between chapters 11 and 12

warnings: erm.. angst. horny. note from nia: anon fantastic news there is almost never a moment where felix is not horny! he was infatuated by mc and now he finally has someone to direct it to. horny depression combo. EDJFGJH /hj. /HJ. but everyone who said he knew what he was doing putting on that outfit was Right you should be loud and be proud . i went overboard i don't know what happened to the hcs i got overwhelmed with felix angst i'm so sorry i am not ok

distraction time...you know how he said he wanted to take mc on a date. first of all, :headinhands: . second of all, i want to think mc was able to take him somewhere. his favourite bookstore maybe...for a walk...just a quiet place without many people around

he probably felt guilty about being so upset and y'know,, it not being the dream first date he wanted. but mc was just like "nope. i don't need a perfect first date or anything, felix. i just want you to know i'm here for you and to help you feel better" SMH SMH

maybe they'll have a canonical real first date later. consider these unofficial outings

fr though i don't even want to imagine felix realizing he can't use his magic. like the devastation of that scenario...help girl..."magic was all i had, all i was ever good at" and he can't even keep his favourite flower bloomed? :/ like the insecurity and genuine depression that would bring me . having mc was a saving grace

i'd think that felix, after some rest y'know, would try to do something he could usually do. even something he'd use as a warmup after exhausting himself and then he just..couldn't.

so he kept trying to do smaller and smaller things and god why is nothing working?

depressive episodes r such Ass and felix seems like the kind of person to struggle with wanting to isolate himself and also wanting mc to just,, hold him and tell him it'll be alright

i'm pretty sure he mentions them bringing him food and generally just being very helpful which is </3 i am so sad. he seems to dislike being reliant on people and :// mc is really helping him work through that

they definitely spent a lot of nights together trying to figure out what had happened to him. mc would not let him stay up alone because he'd probably spiral or stay up too late and feel worse without them

break from the pain: he still goes down in the middle of the night for his olives. actually mc brings it to him themself. he laughs

asian parent bringing up cut up fruit except your partner brings your coping mechanism olives HLESDFSOI

bath . b. bath. bath :thumbs_up: they took more baths together. it's warm and comforting and how are you going to be sad while i put suds in your hair to make you laugh

perhaps mc, seeing how terribly stressed he is, decides to read a book to him. even ask how taxidermy works. what his favourite projects were. things that don't. involve magic.

time to be sad again. he'd try to do simple spells while he was alone and every time he failed he'd get more and more frustrated which eventually boils into. sadness

and the mark would just continue to grow and he'd feel worse. before wearing the new ch 12 outfit where it's visible,, he couldn't even bring himself to look at it in the mirror :/

my god. imagining felix having a genuine breakdown at his desk just crying and venting about how useless and weak he feels and how he feels like nothing and how sorry he is to mc for being this way and having to deal with him and maybe if he was stronger maybe if he could stop messing up and tried harder and he just keeps going and going

help. sorry.

that's grounds for a completely separate hurt comfort scenario. i will tell you rn it ends with him clutching mc almost impossibly close and maybe just maybe accidentally saying i love you (i want a canonical i love you HAS THAT HAPPENED YET? but that scenario would be quite silly and fun if he did it!!!)

suggestive/nsfw starting Now // but also with all the time together and comfort and kisses and shit he was probably on the verge of losing it because Help Him He Is So Down Horrendous

like,, building off that breakdown scene. he wakes up and he's like oh god that really happened and then he looks and their face is(/lips are) so close and he's like oh god.

i would not be shocked if they made out multiple times. not even a little bit. once felix was getting more accustomed to their new routine y'know. ermmm smth smth strong emotions smth smth

i don't fully doubt that the mark is actually uncomfortable but no way in hell that was the only reason he put on that outfit. he sat there putting on the corset then started getting these images in his head of mc kissing him again and touching his chest and taking it off himself and there he goes to shove his face into a pillow absolutely flustered and sweating

WHY WOULD YOU NEED A CORSET FOR THAT OTHER THAN TO SLUT OUT

sorry.

his little smut books are on the bookshelf and he passes by that section while trying to research and he physically tenses up. has to lean his forehead against the wall telling himself to get it together. poor guy

once his horny TM overrode his depression TM then mc asked if he wanted to take a bath together again and he yelled No.

sorry but "All I can think of is you. You're on my mind every waking hour. I ache terribly for you...I want you to hold me, and touch me, and..." WHAT!!!! AND WHAT !! fuck. you want to fuck say it with your chest dear god.

that was obviously being pent up for so long he probably got caught staring at them multiple times.

insert cliche scene where their hands brush each other while reaching for a book and they make eye contact like [ ?@?@!# ]

they were both emotionally all over the place. mc is not innocent here mx. check your chest & "i want you to crack me open like one of your books" EXCUSE ME! yeah? what else mc? you want him to pin you down? you want him to try one of his favourite book scenes on you to spoil him? Get Away From Me

and i know it mentions those little awkward silences which first of all, pain. second of all, would only make all of this worse because Oh i want them so bad but Oh No this is awkward Why Is It Awkward

sorry guys i'm dead. if you want explicit nsfw i could try :heart_eyes: but not in this post i need emotional help

[thisdreamplace]

I had a nasty fight with my former bff. This was long ago. She did the whole 'boycotting me' thing at school and afterwards had a mutual friend pass her msg to me, saying "tell her [me] to get it into her skull that she's not the center of the world, who does she think she is? Stop acting like a #" Im simplifying the words, her actual words were nastier

I got thinking today abt this fight, and her comment abt me that is still way too fresh in my mind even tho I hadn't recalled it in 2-3 yrs!, and I actually decided to use the law to revise my friendship to feel better as what happened after the fight was shameful on my part. But before I knew it, I started rmmbring my relationship with her. How I became a total victim. Got so stuck on her validation, begged her to be friends with me (after I got the degrading msg. 🤕 silly me w/o a backbone lol) and stayed her 'bestie' for way too long. Only after it's all over im noticing smth messed up abt out 'feiendship'. It wasnf that normal I think. She would get so pissed if I did anything that went against her thoughts/beliefs/way (which is why she called me a selfish # that major fight). It was so subtle the way she showed her disapproval. To her, if I did anything not aligned with her, or even makih decisions on my own which didn't involve her, it was wrong. And had consequences like her beinf distant for days etc, or getting angry if I didn't mind read her bla bla, I just had to keep her at the top 24/7 and she expected everyone else to do the same... which I thought was normal... It wasnt. And what would be even more crazy is she never realized how that meant she always wanted the attention. That she always wanted it her way! It just makes me feel... Sad.... When I look back. How couldn't I have notived it before? I used to be strong headed, opinionated before I became 'besties' with her.. That all has changed. I wonder why -_-

It may be dumb on my part but with the weak mind and insecurity I had then, I took that fight/her reaction to the heart and internalisef this stupidiy (DENY MYSELF if the other alternative was denying HER. I didn't think it was wrong. For the oldme, it really wasn't wrong smh). Aaah I'm so sorry old me :(

This fight started bcoz she asked me for smth and I refused, instead of relenting like I always would, and I see now that her reaction (to me not being an obedient # to her ig?🤢) was basically her setting rules. It was wrong of me to refuse, yes, but why did she react that way? Why did this pattern continue? That everyone was selfish if they didn't think of her ;_; like how do u deal with this? And the icing is when I too started to defend her and make excuses for her all the time. And ik I'm making her out to be so strong, don't worry... I accept the strong only rule when the weak submit. And I was weak as hell, so its understandable this whole thing. I think 😅

Idk. I seen your posts abt eyipo with other anons so i hope u can tell me figure out what this was. Its clear to me she was projecting smth about me, and mb throughout our whole friendship she was projecting me. And I would think it was her hurting me, that she was right and I was wrong or maybe I did smth wrong. Mb I thought I deserved being punished that way?!

Today I suddenly had an aha moment and I realised... this is how a victim thinks. I didn't know I was a victim when I was living that stoey aka thought I was powerless. When in fact I really wasn't?! Haha still accepting I 555% created ALL that. The law can knock you out haha

Enough old story I just want to ask, what du u think the msg she sent to me was? Did I really deserve such a reaction (did I mention she included other girls in the boycot? 🤢) just for standing up for myself? What about the whole 'fight' aka showcase of power? And the entire yrs of being friends why did I never realize I was only hurting myself so much by putting her before me? And also, with the everyone pushed out thing, how did it fit in? Like why the hell did I give her too much power in validating me by giving in after the fight in the first place?, and while I did have some fun times (saying this so anyone else who reads this doesn't think it was pure torture lol. We had some common interests tyat no one else in the class shared when we first became 'friends'), deep down I was so unhappy so why didn't this reflect on her? I mean why didn't she ever sense just how much she'd hurt me, why didn't she see how much I put on the back burner coz of her?! Was it as she saw it as her right? I'm just so confused

This is still a bitter pill to swallow tbh but I have to face this in order to move on. This person and my life with her has left me wit many scars and I got to understand how I did this so I never attract such a person in my life again. Its not even abt bejnf a victim. As I said, these victimy things were subtle and I only noted them when it was too late and I was a shell, like she getting super pissed and disapproving if I had a differing opinion and me blowijg it out of proportion and tailoring my views or not expressing them so as to not feel the disapproval...thanks boycott conditioning ig? 😭 Aaaah even talking agaunst her rn is making me uncomfortable. Which makes me think I still am scared of her subconsciously even tho she's no longer in my life. Like, what in me made me choose her? I haven't healed, obviously by this ask as u can tell, but idk what is it in my self concept that had this whole thing in my past even happen

My friend, I also want to say I think you're a beautiful soul 🥺. And im sorry for the long ask lol. And I pray you'll always have all your desires. And plz, was it hard for u at first when u learned about u creating everything? The good, the bad, and the repulsive (like this story)? How did u get over old stories? Ty ty ty 😭

To begin with you're being really harsh on yourself. Like, I know it's hard, but it's never that serious. And trust me, this is something I have to remind myself of regularly. Because there have definitely been moments in life where I look back on myself in that moment, and I feel like I was pathetic and would slap myself if I could. But the truth is, there's just no need for any of that. We always did the best we could. We always did, period. We couldn't have done anything differently and this will continue to be true our entire lives. Looking back on the past with such overwhelming feelings, is really not needed. I get looking back to learn from it, but practice coming from a place of love and acceptance instead. It will help you grow, rather than get stuck back in this cycle of self-hate and confusion. Plus, you actually never need to analyze the past to grow but that's beyond the point right now.

To me, by reading your ask, the message she sent to you was clear. You feel you deserve less in life, you feel you're not good enough, you feel like a victim to life and others, you feel like you're not empowered or the operant power of your reality. It's not about her being wrong and you being right, and I get this is one of the hardest pills to swallow. Everyone is you pushed out. Therefore, there's simply no such thing as who is right and who is wrong anymore. It was only ever you.

When it comes to everyone is you pushed out, you have to understand this person isn't this way because that's who they are. They were that way because that's who you were. Inside of you, you brought their character to life. Therefore, the same way you are not stuck to such an undesirable self concept, neither is that person. It's not that you chose her and attracted her in. You were just dealing with yourself. That's what I hope you walk away from this response understanding. Because by thinking she was outside of you, you're missing the mark. And this is such an important concept to understand when it comes to the law of assumption, because it's really at the forefront of everything. People play such a huge role in our lives, whether it's relationships, jobs, opportunities, etc etc. So understanding how everyone is you pushed out actually works is extremely important.

So instead of putting all this blame on her or even putting the blame on yourself, all these memories really do is give you a glimpse into who you were at the time. It shows you the beliefs you held about yourself. It shows you what your self concept was. That's all it's doing. So in that way, there's actually no one to blame at all. I know it feels good to put blame, even when it's on yourself, but the truth is there's no room for blame when you learn about the law. You simply take responsibility and become empowered by the power you have held this entire time. And you practice making it work in your favor.

If you want to see how something was apart of your self concept, all you have to do is pay attention to what you are thinking/feeling. Shame, not being good enough, etc etc is all just stories you once held onto. Now you don't have to hold onto those stories anymore. Now that you know the power you hold, you get to make a new decision for yourself. Rather than ruminating of the painful past, allow it to be and know how that's not your story anymore.

Was it difficult for me to accept how I created everything? Yes and no. It's been a journey. While I could accept it logically, emotionally it was still very painful. Many times I wanted to cry and lash out when I felt alone and felt upset that no one was there for me. Although, I knew deep down it appeared that way because of my own concept of self. So yeah, it's been a journey. And it's honestly not always delightful. But this is the journey we have to take for the rest of our lives, so we might as well get used to practicing and applying these concepts. Instead of continuing to hold ourselves in such painful lights. I got through old stories, and I continue to get through old stories, by feeling all the pain that came up. By allowing myself to cry and feel however I felt like during those times. And in the back of my mind I knew I was getting stronger in my power. I knew how I would keep persisting once the pain subsided. And little by little, old stories fade more and more. That persistence to continue choosing better for yourself, is truly more powerful than it may seem in a difficult moment. Have trust in how it's all working out for you regardless.

Hopefully this is helpful! Thank you for your kind words. 💖

[harpersplay]

Sure some people could go on and on and say that that Beth really does have feelings for him deep down or whatever but I'm choosing to see what's on my screen. MISS hates him and wants him dead . I know some ppl r happy with the fact that he's fawning over her and that he believes in her or whatever. honestly good for them. I'm happy that they're able to find some joy in this show . cuz everytime time I watch the show I want to gouge my eyes out. I just think it's kinda weird that we always see this man's trauma like constantly and THAT never gets talked about. I've no problems with toxic ships I mean i shipped them heavy in season 1/2ish but it has to be 50/50 . Rn its like 30/70 and it rly does not sit right with me at ALL. They're making him look so pathetic and weak. I keep watching and hopes that it will get better but it never does. Lol SMH

I think my feelings on the Beth/Rio romantic relationship are well-addressed on this blog. So, yeah, I'm not getting anything positive from the supposedly shippy scenes this season. But you hit on a big problem. The "relationship" is completely unbalanced.