#so I blocked them as you do. besides they’re a Big Blog they don’t know I exist anyway | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

monstersinthecosmos · 4 months

Note

I know you probably don’t want to dwell on the show and the negative but I absolutely hate what has happened on here and how hateful people are in the VC fandom it’s just very demoralizing and makes me want to retreat from anything besides the books completely. The discourse was spicy before the show but everything is just even more divisive now and it has sucked the fun out of it. Not really an ask more of a vent sorry

Hi there!

You’re correct that I don’t particularly find it fun to dwell on the negative stuff – as you said yourself, SOMETIMES THE DISCOURSE SUCKS THE FUN OUT OF IT. But I do understand how you feel and I want to say a couple things and I hope this helps you find a groove.

First of all, I did my best not to acknowledge it too much because I didn’t want to validate the folks who were being cunts to me lol, but please know that this fandom (at least on Tumblr) has ALWAYS been kinda fucking violent towards me LOL. I started VC tumbling back in 2016 and it’s ALWAYS been a fucking trash fire. It is hard out there for Marius stans lmfao.

Like, when I was first posting on Tumblr and acclimating to the Tumblr culture it was so much of like, me feeling brave enough to share meta only for someone to be RB’ing me to tell me I’m wrong, or me talking about how much I liked something about Marius only for someone to vague me, or it was me hosting the huge fandom Discord back in 2017 only for people to then come on tumblr and complain about how the Discord was way too Marius Friendly as if like, a drama-free space where we can discuss the books makes it a harbor for predators.

Of course I also had the gaggle of fucking morons who were constantly stalking me, catfishing their way into my servers to try to take screenshots and write call outs and cancel me, who would not stop preaching about how “all these big blogs” are “actually such terrible people” because “look at the things they ship” even when I’d never been unkind to them, even occasionally donated to their GFMs. These are folks who think they’re morally in the right for protecting the virtue of Armand’s poor teenage asshole and executed this justice by stalking and harassing an ACTUAL PERSON LOL. Like, listen. I’m sorry to burst ur bubble, but Armand doesn’t exist. He’s letters on a paper. I’m actually a real person and you’re up my fucking ass because I don’t’ even fucking know why, you’re jealous of my fucking Tumblr engagement or something? Which one of us is actually the creep here lol?? Is this a race to the bottom to be the valedictorian of clown school on the website for homeschooled clowns?

I’ve also had the pleasure of being on the receiving end of acephobic discourse, being told I don’t do enough to protect every individual in fandom from their own bullies as if it's my job to do that, being called ableist for how I wrote Daniel in my fics even though I was projecting and discussing my own personal experiences – I’ve also had a project collaborator have a tantrum and try to steal my work until I had to threaten with legal action, I’ve been put on block lists, I’ve had many people consume my fics in secret without actually leaving comments because I’m too toxic for them to communicate with in public.

BLAH BLAH BLAH.

This was all before AMC showed up LMFAO. It was not easy for me! It’s still not always easy!

And so yeah like, by nature of the fandom EXPLODING we are going to see more drama. More people is more drama. The nature of the discourse often hedges into real life issues that people are very opinionated and passionate about and there are conflicting needs inside the same space about how to hold conversations. Even just the other day I RB’d a joke about Anne Rice and OP got upset with me because they didn’t want actual fans interacting with it. Whoops! I didn’t know! I just thought it was funny. ;.;

Even in good faith and with the best of intentions we’re going to step on each other’s toes, and we’re gonna find people we don’t vibe with. And that’s normal and it’s fine.

What ISN’T normal is this inability to disengage that I think we see often in online space, and I don’t want to get into a whole side essay about all the reasons why I think that happens. But sometimes you gotta be the bigger person and take it on the chin.

Like, yeah, it sucks. It sucks the fun out of the room when you share a space with such bitter people who can’t be kind to each other. But like. THAT’S A THEM PROBLEM, YOU KNOW? And I think we gotta remember that sometimes people like that do it for the attention or the spike of dopamine when they can pick a fight and honestly like, you don’t need to waste YOUR OWN time on it, but you’re also doing that person a kindness if you don’t enable the bad behavior.

And it sucks that Tumblr’s mute tools are awful!!!!! It would make navigating so much easier to be able to curate the dash a little better and keep the bad actors out of your space. I sometimes just fuck off and don’t even come online for days if I know I’m not in a good headspace and won’t have the strength to just fucking ignore it, because sometimes drama catches my eye and I get nosy and go down the rabbit hole, too – having ADHD makes it really hard to avoid sometimes LOL – but like I try to be reasonable and love myself enough to avoid it when I can help it. I’m not willing to make my own problems everyone else’s problem, and I hope that some of these shit starters in fandom will get there, themselves.

So yeah it blows when the vibes are fucking atrocious, and it REALLY blows when it’s a fandom this small where you can’t avoid it. Even when it’s a vocal minority it really just kills the fucking mood.

BUT WHAT I WILL SAY.

Whenever I say shit like “write what you want to read” and we’re talking about fanfic, or even meta or even silly headcanon posts or jokes, that also means draw what you want to see, it also means make what you want to hold, apply it to any creation you can think of. Put the thing you want to see into the world. And it counts for fandom, too.

I don’t want to be part of a fandom that’s constantly infighting and attacking people, so I don’t fight and attack people. I don’t want to be called a predator for being a Marius fan and so I don’t engage in posts that say as much, not even to argue, because I don’t want my followers (who might also be Marius fans!) to have to see that on their dash. I want us to protect our peace and create a space we want to be in.

Like I have a policy that any time someone says I’m a freak or any time I see truly godawful word salad discourse, I go out of my way to post something kinky and offputting about Marius LMFAOOOO because I want to be surrounded by reasonable fun people who share my sensibility for fiction. AND SOMETIMES IT’S CRICKETS, AND SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO WORK HARD TO FIND YOUR PEOPLE. But at the end of the day I know I’m being my most sincere self and I’m trying to have a good time and just post fun things that I enjoy. And like, the book fandom is small as fuck and we’re all famished, but I think if more of us did that, we’d build a much more productive and tolerant space.

And for all the shit I’ve mentioned, all the drama and attacks and all the times people have harassed me or tried to make me feel small, you know what? I just got back from @apoptoses & @cup-of-lixx 's wedding and they met in VCblr! We spent all week with our VCblr friends! We all went to New Orleans together last Halloween !

When I used to work on ships it was like a fandom friend world tour! I had so many coffees in port with my vampire friends!

I’ve learned so much about writing from all the time I’ve spent here and the community of writer friends who supported me! There’s folks I met on VCblr that I talk to LITERALLY every day! They are such huge parts of my life and genuine life-long friends!!!!!!

Sometimes it seems like the ROI is garbage but like, so much of finding the joy is also learning to protect yourself from the negativity.

It IS out there. It DOES suck. And it’s lonely when you haven’t found your people yet. But fandom doesn’t have to be the 500 angry assholes arguing with each other about a fucking TV show, it can be your 3 besties in a private group chat having a great time.

Like I just drove @hekateinhell to the airport (met THROUGH TUMBLR!) and on the way back I was listening to an episode of Last Day and they were discussing the concept that “community is a life raft” and it hit me so hard man!!!!!!!!!!!

Find your people! Block the shit starters! Mute discourse buzzwords that you know are going to upset you!

Keep! Posting! What! You! Want! To! See!!

Fandom is self-generating, we can do this!

My inbox is always open and BELIEVE ME I have been motherfucking persona non grata in this place before and I know how rancid the vibe can be so please come talk any time it's grinding you down, I got you!!!!!!!!!!!!

#fandom lolitics #also some more thoughts in the tags lol but #this also means LEAVE COMMENTS #not just on fics but like on art on HC posts on whatever #talk to people!#support each other!!!

38 notes · View notes

sleepingdeath-light · 1 year

Text

giacomo smut hcs ; 18+

requested by ; anonymous (22/05/23)

fandom(s) ; pokémon

fandom masterlist(s) ; here

character(s) ; giacomo

outline ; “Arven and Giacomo (separate) x reader headcanons!! :) can I request nsfw? I’m not a minor! I’m over 18 actually~ (Also both from Pokémon 🖤🖤🖤)”

warning(s) ; sexually explicit content, bdsm, pain play

note ; as paldea is based on iberia (spain & portugal) i’ll be incorporating some spanish and portuguese into this piece

minors and ageless blogs will be blocked

he has a well curated playlist of songs that he’d be happy to use during foreplay/sex — and it’s actually good

versatile switch but generally leans more dominant because he likes being able to take care of you, but if you ask he’s also happy to bottom

his nipples are both pierced and are extremely sexually sensitive

excels at dirty talk whether you prefer degradation or praise

equally as happy to call you ninfeta, vadia, safado or chachorro as he is to call you amor, corázon, mi reina/rey or mi amado/amada

he’s extremely good with his hands and his mouth, making oral and sensation based foreplay extremely enjoyable and often times overwhelming for you

also shockingly kinky but strictly abides by the standard rules of bdsm: always have a safe word and safe action, always establish boundaries before hand, always give the option to back out (and don’t punish someone for doing so), thorough aftercare for all involved parties

so you two can be as rough as you like — biting, scratching, cutting, bruising, etc. — so long as you know each other’s boundaries and engage in proper aftercare

slightly sadomasochistic and is open with you about what gets him off so you’re on the same page

aftercare usually consists of a detailed conversation and walk through of what happened whilst you clean each other up and check each other over for any injuries that weren’t intended — making sure nothing gets infected — with particular focus on the mental health of that day’s dominant and the physical health of that day’s submissive

you also go to the bathroom and have some water/snacks just to cover your bases

he’s quite sexually open and would be up for introducing more people to the bedroom so long as you both have set boundaries in place and everyone involved agrees to them — just wants to keep everyone safe

as much as he loves kinky sex, soft lazy sex also has a big place in his heart and he adores being able to wake up beside you and just slowly get each other off whilst praising and complimenting each other right as you’re waking up

up for collaring or you’re up for it, but since it’s a big commitment he wouldn’t bring it up for a while

if gags are involved then he insists on introducing a safe action for when they’re used

whilst he may seem overly cautious he just wants to make sure that you’re both as safe and comfortable as possible — prepares ahead of any potential bad situations in order to try and prevent them

amazingly well endowed but he doesn’t brag about it — only really bringing it up if you’re asking him to penetrate you because he knows that a lot of prep will be necessary

would be up for introducing toys like vibrators and cock rings but, as is standard for him, he researches them all thoroughly to make sure you get the safest and most effective versions of each toy — that are in your price range, at least

#sleepingdeath #gender neutral reader #minors dni #minors fuck off #smut #smut hcs #pokémon smut #pokemon giacomo smut #pokemon x reader #pokemon giacomo x reader #pokemon scarvi x reader #pokemon scarvi smut #pokémon scarlet x reader #pokémon violet x reader

46 notes · View notes

kipandkandicore · 11 months

Text

alright, so we feel like we need to respond to @eeveecraft ‘s post that they made using the document we’ve compiled.

looks like they’ve blocked this syscourse blog… but not our main. so we cannot reblog their post with our thoughts, but we can still see it (and therefore are going to respond to it). we don't think it's block evasion to respond in this way… (though if it is, let us know and we'll rewrite this response on our main blog which isn't blocked).

we don’t like to vague or to talk about a post without reblogging it directly, but we don’t see another way for us to respond properly, so here we go.

we are anticipating this will be quite long... so we're preemptively putting this under a cut.

here’s a link to the original post so you can read it for yourselves and come to your own conclusions!!

and here is a link to our document compiling thoughts on tulpamancy language by those affected. it is so important to center voices of marginalized groups in discussions that impact them!!

but after witnessing an announcement by Plural Nest that they’re switching to parogenic terminology because they’ve been convinced by sysmeds that tulpa = appropriation while literally “sourcing” things from minors, singlets, non-Tibetans, and yes, of course, sysmeds is just so goddamn frustrating that I’m going to write this post. I will be referring to this Google Doc Plural Nest themselves linked in their announcement that contains a motley of blogs and accounts by various people:

it's weird to us that at the very beginning of this post the author claims that the poc voices we've included should be disregarded because they are "minors, singlets, non-tibetans, and sysmeds."

first of all: do minors and singlets not get to have a say on their culture? do they not get to speak out when they notice cultural appropriation that is causing them harm? additionally, is this not an issue that concerns buddhists, and specifically asian buddhists? as we understand it, the term "tulpa" has direct ties to vajrayana buddhist practices. we believe that a buddhist does not have to be specifically tibetan in order to understand this language and to feel affected by western cultural appropriation.

also: how does this person define "sysmed?" because many of the individuals linked in the document are not system medicalists, nor do many of them disbelieve that the western practice of tulpamancy exists. as far as we know, this has always been an issue of adjusting language to respect people of color. not attacking the practice itself.

last, it's interesting that they linked the doc (which includes our tumblr information) but didn't feel it was necessary to @ us, either on this blog or on our main. huh.

now onto their prefaces:

Something that has always bothered me about this “discourse” is that the people who go on and on and on about how they’re protecting minorities and stopping actual harmful, real appropriation by attacking the Tulpamancy community never: Go after actual harmful depictions of tulpa that actively profit off of sensationalizing the paranormal version of the word and deliberately linking it to Tibetan Buddhism (Supernatural, Mandela Catalogue, Slenderman, etc). Uplift the voices of actual Tibetan Buddhists, even ones who disagree with them (which there ARE Tibetan Buddhists who are 100% okay with tulpa as a term, not just the Tibetan Buddhist AMA). Explain how us using tulpa to describe our systemmates is actively harming Tibetan Buddhists. They just say it’s harmful without providing any real examples of harm besides the word annoying them.

why put "discourse" in quotes? are we having a conversation? or are you trying to make it look like these discussions are one sided?

we're a white system. however, we are doing what we can to learn about racism, and are trying to become an active antiracist in our spaces. a big part of unlearning racism is learning how and when to pipe down and listen to the voices of people of color, especially when they're speaking out about something that harms them.

we're not the ones insisting that tulpa language is harmful with no basis for these claims. we are doing what we can to uplift marginalized voices who have said as much. centering poc voices in issues that they feel concern them is an important part of having less racist discussions in our spaces. idk if we’d say we're "protecting minorities" here... rather, we're attempting to make sure the voices of these minorities are heard, acknowledged, and taken seriously. and eeveecraft has done the first two in their post, but not the last.

1) we are personally unfamiliar with supernatural (watched a few seasons years ago and haven't touched it since), mandela catelogue, or slenderman. in fact, we haven't really seen tulpamancy acknowledged in public spaces and fictional works at all. that doesn't mean that we condone the racism within these works!!! we just can't speak on them as of yet because we haven't consumed that content. we certainly would like to, so we can understand what this author is saying about tulpamancy portrayals in media. but we feel like sensationalized instances of tulpamancy in popular media is not the only way this language has been harmful. people online using tulpamancy language have proven to be racist and unwilling to listen to marginalized groups. and since we're more involved with the system community than with the supernatural, mandela catelogue, or slenderman communities... we haven't spoken about it. because we are not a part of those spaces, and are still pretty uneducated about them specifically and how they have portrayed tulpamancy.

this doesn't mean we'll never get around to it! we'd love to help shed light on the racism of tulpamancy in popular media, and we hopefully will one day soon! but that doesn't negate the fact that advocates for tulpamancy language online are being incredibly racist...

2) again, we think that asian buddhists have the right to be upset about this, whether or not they're specifically tibetan. what's more, multiple people with testimonies in the document are actually, specifically tibetan! we'll be interested to see eeveecraft's sources of tibetan buddhists who are pro-tulpa language... maybe they'll be referenced later in the post? (edit side note: they referenced one person they know personally, one tumblr user, and one twitter user, whose thread we could not access for some reason. we added the testimony of the tumblr user to our document, though!)

3) we have explained it. language appropriation is real. it has genuinely harmful effects. our words don't exist in a vacuum. cultural appropriation is not some nebulous thing that never causes real harm to those who experience it!! i mean seriously... is that really what this author believes? we'll include some links to cultural appropriation and specifically how it affects buddhists and/or people of tibet:

x x x

we've said this before, but we will choose to believe the marginalized groups who say that this language directly affects and harms them, rather than those who claim otherwise without the ability to back up those claims with articles, resources, or testimonies from those minorities.

how are these not examples of real harm?

the testimony from the tumblr user referenced in eeveecraft’s post did speak favorably of tulpamancy as a practice, but didn’t say much if anything about tulpamancy terminology, which is what we have been trying to learn more about and discuss.

The intention of these people never was to protect vulnerable minorities, it was to deliberately blacklist a word a community has used for over a decade and a word that is literally being used in academic studies. If we as a community dropped tulpa, cold-turkey, 100%, we would lose access to so much of our history and access to scientific studies that the community NEEDS to be more accepted by the general public.

we vehemently disagree! our intentions are to uplift the voices of vulnerable minorities who have genuine, understandable concerns about tulpamancy language. we don't believe that if this language was changed that community members would lose access to their history and scientific studies.

language changes all the time. researchers have to adjust their language accordingly all the time. there are tons of words that used to be used in research, but aren't any longer because it was discovered that those words were bigoted or culturally appropriated. this literally happens quite regularly in academic spaces, as far as we're aware (examples: multiple personality disorder -> dissociative identity disorder, transvestite -> transgender, etc!)

we have a separate post we're actually working on that refutes these claims made by eeveecraft. we'd call this sort of thinking fearmongering: the action of intentionally trying to make people afraid of something when this is not necessary or reasonable, within system spaces. eeveecraft's post is actually rife with fearmongering, and there is a huge issue with fearmongering in pro tulpa discussion.

after this, eeveecraft links to a tibetan buddhist who was open on reddit about the practice of western tulpamancy and how it relates (or doesn’t relate!) to the buddhist practice. from what we can tell, the author of the post believes that western tulpamancy and buddhist tulpamancy are similar in the name alone, and that’s it.

our issue with this is… if they share a name but are not the same practice at all… why wouldn’t the tulpa community want to change their language? if the language was shifted, there wouldn’t be all this confusion and arguing about a western practice with an appropriated tibetan name.

it’s true though that this is a post concerning tulpa language made by a tibetan buddhist, so we’ll be adding their testimony to our doc. it was never our goal or intention to cherry-pick testimonies - we genuinely weren’t aware of dharmayokeyodasampa’s post!

eeveecraft’s next large section discusses the differences between modern and paranormal tulpamancy, how one is harmful while the other isn’t, and how the two terms should not be conflated.

but they fail to mention how common and likely it is for people to conflate two different terms that have the exact same name. how is the average person supposed to know that when the community talks about tulpamancy they’re referring to modern tulpamancy and not paranormal tulpamancy?

it’s especially bizarre that they claim alexandra david-neel’s tulpamancy definition is the one that is harmful. don’t get us wrong, we completely agree! but that line of thinking doesn’t align with that of other pro tulpas discussing tulpamancy. many tulpamancers are huge supporters of adn and still today claim that she was not racist and did not commit cultural appropriation through her “fact or fiction” tales in magic and mystery in tibet.

like, this is incredibly common. for as long as we’ve been in system spaces and have been trying to learn about tulpamancy (which has been more than a year at this point) we have never seen a single person try to separate sensationalized media portrayals of tulpamancy (aka “paranormal tulpamancy”) from the western practice (aka “modern tulpamancy”) that eeveecraft talks about. if other tulpamancers were also trying to make this distinction… wouldn’t it be more regularly included in discussion? we think it’s a huge and important distinction, if it really exists as one. but we’ve never seen anyone talking about it.

this also leads us to wonder… if people within the tulpa community themselves are having to make distinctions between two different types of tulpamancy - one of which is perfectly fine and normal while the other is racist cultural appropriation… wouldn’t practitioners of modern tulpamancy want to change their terminology as a way to distance themselves from the real racists?

they later write:

Also, important that another blog reblogged that post [our post with the doc, we believe] and mentioned that they’ve spoken to actual Tibetans on Facebook and how none of them think tulpa is harmful specifically because it’s so far-removed from Tibetan Buddhism. Like, they’re cool with it as long as the community doesn’t try and link it to Tibetan Buddhism, which is literally what the community does and has been doing for YEARS.

the most glaring issue we have with this is… if the term was coined by a white explorer appropriating tibetan culture in the 20th century (which it was…), and if other tulpamancers will readily admit that tulpamancy language has close ties to tibetan buddhism (which they do… and it does…) why the huge push from pro-tulpas to distance themselves from their own language and their own language’s history?

this post both claims and denies that tulpamancy language is connected to buddhism. other tulpamancers will readily admit that tulpamancy as a term was created by alexandra david-neel, an explorer which bastardized the terms “sprul pa” and “tulku” in order to write a best-selling book and make money.

it’s weird that those who are pro tulpa language recognize these facts while simultaneously trying to brush them off and sweep them under the rug.

the community is trying to link tulpamancy to tibetan buddhism by maintaining their culturally appropriative language. tulpamancy language directly ties this western practice to vajrayana buddhism and the asians who practice it. we don’t understand the willingness to acknowledge and deny this fact at the same time? maybe we’re misunderstanding this part of the post, but it seems incredibly bizarre to us.

the next section explains that asian poc should have no say over what is and isn’t cultural appropriation of tibetan buddhism. and at first, this does seem like an important point to make! the author explained how chinese individuals should have no say over what is or isn’t japanese cultural appropriation as an example.

but this point still sits weirdly with us. what about diaspora tibetans - those who are culturally tibetan but live outside of their homeland? what about those who are buddhist and who have concerns over their religion and how aspects of it are being taken, bastardized, and promoted without permission or adequate education? as white people, why do we get to decide who has more of a stake in these discussions than the buddhist people of color expressing their worries and concerns? do white non-buddhist voices matter more than asian buddhists regarding this topic?

we really don’t think so.

All it [tulpamancy terminology discourse] does is segregate the community and draw unnecessary lines, which is exactly what sysmeds want because it’s ways easier to harass and kill smaller communities that way or turn them against each other until they eat each other alive. And they won’t just stop with tulpa terminology, they’re just using tulpa because they found a convenient scapegoat to attack it. Sysmeds literally find ANY excuse to demonize or take away a word from the endogenic community, it’s no different here.

To further prove this point, sysmeds literally tried to say “system hopping” is a term appropriated from RAMCOA survivors, which was completely false. They are not afraid to pull the appropriation card on any word they can, tulpa isn’t the only instance of it.

again, many of the people who are bringing up these concerns aren’t even sysmeds. many of them actively support the practice of tulpamancy and endogenic plurality in general. this 100% has to do with racism in the community and unlearning racial biases. the goals of this discussion are not to destroy the tulpa community.

we genuinely don’t see what system hopping has to do with this. because again, the people making these points against tulpamancy terminology are mostly not sysmeds at all.

and if eeveecraft themself can admit that there are two different kinds of tulpamancy - one good (modern), one bad (paranormal), why in the world wouldn’t those who practice the “good” tulpamancy want to change their language in order to be respectful to people of color while further removing themselves from the “paranormal tulpamancers?”

they then say that many people who are against tulpamancy terminology don’t even know what it is. and that may be true for some systems, but certainly not all! we are against tulpamancy terminology and we understand completely what the practice is. our wife has created a thoughtform (which she achieved using tulpamancy guides and engaging with the tulpa community). she has been an active member of this community for quite some time, and changed her labels recently after learning about the dubious roots of the terminology.

just because willogenic (one of the proposed terms to replace tulpamancy) as a label does not cover the whole scope of tulpa experiences, doesn’t mean there are no other terms that have been suggested.

parogenic exists. paro/paromancy exists. thoughtform exists. and if none of these words truly would work as a suitable replacement, we fully believe in the community’s capability to come together and select a new, less racist term. we have complete faith that the tulpa community can achieve this.

it’s also worth noting that many of the proposed replacement terms were created by and for the plural community. we fully believe that if there is no term which perfectly fits the definition, we can change the definition of the term!! so paro could mean any headmate created in the way tulpas are created. the community made these terms, and the community can change them if they need to!!

it’s a shame to see eeveecraft does not share that same faith in their community.

next, they talk about how discussing tulpamancy terminology actually causes harm:

Let’s start with me. On multiple occasions, I have had multiple anons harass my inbox, calling me racist, calling me slurs, and even sexually harassing me in the comments of one of my posts specifically because of this issue. In fact, several sysmeds tried raiding our Discord server alongside harassing us on Tumblr because of what Amanitasys’s post started, and this has also happened to @cambriancrew, @sophieinwonderland, and more because we happen to be blogs that intersect both communities.

we have never, nor will we ever, support doxxing, targeted harassment, suicide baiting, or any other horrible thing that can come out of people being vicious and self-centered online. of course, we can see why folks may call eeveecraft racist, because they are promoting incredibly racist ideas.

the user cambriancrew has been a loud, ableist voice in discourse spaces for years.

the user sophieinwonderland is a proud racist, and is a promoter of zoophilia and other outrageously harmful ideas like transx. we’ve written on this before.

it makes sense that people want to call out and address these issues when they see them. while we do not condone harassment, it’s not fair to call those who are voicing understandable concerns “harassers.” it’s not fair to lump these people in with actual online bullies who cause serious, long-lasting harm.

further, they talk about how anti-tulpamancy terminology discussion harms the plural community by dividing it.

The relationship between the Tulpamancy and broader Plurality community was already tenuous, and for most of the Tulpamancy community’s history, it has stayed isolated from other Plurality circles. It was only within the past few years that the communities started to intermingle, but this drama can ruin that.

Because as someone who HAS been in the community for over half a decade, I can tell you that the majority of the Tulpamancy community thinks this drama is stupid and aren’t going to change terminology for multiple reasons. Now, do NOT take this as the community going, “Tulpa is a completely unproblematic word!” when the community has debated the term’s usage for YEARS. Nobody is saying the word is perfect, but it’s what the community has used for over a decade now and every attempt to change the word has failed. And honestly, as someone who’s reviewed the vast majority of Tulpamancy guides in existence, I likely know better than anyone else that if tulpa was blacklisted like some people want, the community would lose so much history and resources, it’s not even funny.

it's interesting to see the author here claiming that those within the tulpamancy community think this drama is stupid and aren't ever going to change the terminology. especially when multiple times in the post, eeveecraft admits that there are issues with the terminology that tulpamanvers will readily admit, and that those who are "paranormal tulpamancers" are somehow completely distinct from and unrelated to "modern tulpamancers."

we recently created a post on reddit's r/tulpas, hoping to share our document compiling asian buddhist voices on the matter. we wrote about our experience here - basically, our post was removed less than 5 minutes after being posted, despite complying with the subreddit's own rules and guidelines.

it leads us to wonder... how many other posts like ours have been taken down by the moderators without a second glance? how many other pro-tulpa, anti-tulpa terminology folks have tried to speak out on this issue among their peers, only to be immediately dogpiled, shut down, and have their posts removed? how can good-faith discussion happen in these spaces when the community leaders are so quick to remove content, and those seeking answers and discussion are dismissed as bad actors?

we think that those with concerns (either from within the tulpa community or from asian, buddhist spaces) absolutely have the right to air their grievances. and by ignoring, deflecting, and brushing off these voices, those who are pro-tulpa terminology are not doing anything to help, participate in, or even put an end to this discussion. instead, they are perpetually putting it off, and allowing a wound within the community to fester and get worse over time as resentment builds.

to us, this poses a more significant threat to the tulpamancy community and the plural community overall than any real attempt to discuss the issues of racism and cultural appropriation regarding tulpa language.

eeveecraft then claims that changing tulpamancy terminology will cause others to lose access to the wealth of resources created by tulpamancers over the years.

If we completely dropped the word, the ability of new people to look up and find these guides becomes FAR more difficult. “Tulpa” is a unique and consistent word and makes it easy to look into the community, which in turn helps people discover resources that can help them on their tulpa creation journey.

their responses to the anticipated "just change the resources" argument are as follows (paraphrased)

there are tons of guides, resources and research articles already published using tulpamancy language. and tulpas need these to remain the same in order for tulpamancy to spread in the public sphere

the majority of people who wrote resources are no longer in the community and may not consent to their resources being adjusted

they personally are critical of and found flaws with other tulpamancy replacement terms

there aren't as many resources being created now as there used to be

we've seen a lot of these claims before, and are actually working on a separate post that refutes many of them. but basically:

we believe sites like tulpanomicon, tulpa.io, and tulpa.info could include information as banners and on their front pages that express community concerns and explain that they are making the shift. sites can also be set up so they redirect to others. so, say, if the terminology changed to "paro/paromancy," the sites "tulpa.info" could redirect to "paro.info." the community could rally together to rewrite many resources that exist, while creating new ones. this wouldn't be an instantaneous shift, but it certainly could be achieved over time.

for those who aren't in the community or don't want their resources changed... they can be left alone. if the host sites (reddit, tulpanomicon, tulpa.io, tulpa.info, etc) included disclaimers on their websites about the language shifts, it wouldn't be that big of a deal for many guides and resources to be left untouched

if the community were to come together and choose, say, paromancy as a replacement for tulpamancy, the definition of this term could probably be adjusted to accommodate for tulpas who were created naturally or spontaneously. with such a huge language shift, it makes sense that some adjustments need to be made in order for everyone to be represented. additionally, we see no issue with "thoughtform" being both an umbrella term and meaning something specific based on the context. there are many, many umbrella terms which function this way!

honestly the shift of language might bring with it a resurgence of interest in the community. especially if people are vocal about the change and why the community has decided to commit to this shift! we genuinely think that this could bring so much good press to the community and help it regain popularity.

after this, they speak about how those pushing for a change in tulpa terminology remind them of sysmeds, and that they have to be doubly careful about which spaces they interact with because those which claim to be "inclusive" may be phasing out language that they believe is racist, ultimately excluding those who use tulpa language and cutting them off from the plural community.

we don't think this has to happen. we think this makes a lot of assumptions and assumes the worst about these communities, and fails to recognize or acknowledge the genuine concerns people have.

we run a positivity blog for systems, plurals, and multiples of all sorts. right now, we're nearing 2k followers. on that blog, we are very clear in our stance that we are pro tulpa, anti tulpa terminology. we will never turn away a tulpamancer from our blog simply for the words they choose to use to identify themselves. we will be vocal about lifting up marginalized voices, we will be honest about our concerns, and we personally will not be using or advocating for tulpamancy language on that blog. but we certainly have not and will not cut off tulpamancers from that space.

we don't see why this can't be the case in more places. it is not our goal to divide the plural community from the tulpa community. rather, we think this shift could bring us together as we join to make a long overdue shift away from culturally appropriative language. we fully believe this could make the community stronger as a result.

So, in the Tulpamancy community’s perspective, we either: A.) Give up our most used word and people lose access to so much history and resources, and create a huge divide in our already fragmented community. Or: B.) Stick to our guns, but be excommunicated and villainized by the broader Plurality community.

we aren't a fan of the false dichotomy here. we think there is a secret third option, which is:

c. band together with the plural community to address this issue, choose a new term, commit to change, and adjust the resources we can while uplifting the voices of those who have been so often silenced along the way. this change could bring the community together and also shed positive light on the community in public spaces, bringing us together and strengthening both communities as a result.

personally, we like this option a lot more!

in their next section, eeveecraft writes:

So, what are people trying to attack so hard and blacklist from plural spaces? What are people fighting so hard against to conform to their standards, or be labeled as racist? What Tulpamancy is, for a lot of people, is a means to living a better life. I cannot tell you how many stories I have read of tulpas stopping their hosts from taking their own lives, how creating a tulpa has hugely improved the mental health of others, or how tulpas encourage their hosts to socialize and take care of the body, or how just making a tulpa connects you to a community with the mutual interest in self-improvement and self-love, and so, so much more. Tulpamancy improves people’s lives, and Tulpamancy techniques are not exclusive to us.

we absolutely agree that the practice of tulpamancy can be immensely beneficial, beautiful, and positively life-changing. we ourselves have seen our wife's mental health and outlook on life drastically change for the better through fostering connection and building a relationship with her thoughtform, nevetien. nev has improved our wife's quality of life so much, and the community they've found online and with each other truly is something special.

we love this for her. we want them to be able to grow and flourish in the future together, and we feel so lucky to be able to help them nurture each other and witness their strength and joy as they grow closer together as a team.

this does not negate the valid concerns over tulpamancy language by buddhist poc. it is possible to support the practice of tulpamancy while rejecting the racist roots of the language. and shifting away from tulpa language does not mean abandoning those with thoughtforms, willomates, paros, or whatever term is chosen in the future.

finally, the conclusion:

“Tulpa” as a term, at best, is murky. Nobody is arguing that David-Neel was a saint. She wasn’t, and she’s dead and buried. Tulpa isn’t her word anymore. People in the Tulpamancy community are just fed up with outsiders trying to dictate how their community should be run. We know the term has issues, we know its history is not all sunshine and rainbows. We do not need outsiders barging in and stating the obvious and acting like they know more than we do about our own community and history. And look, I know some people who believe tulpa is appropriative have good intentions and just want to be non-offensive, but people take advantage of that. Sysmeds took advantage of people wanting to do right and weaponized people into being their mouthpieces under the guise of, “We just want to be racially-sensitive.” But instead of actually protecting minorities, all it did was harm another minority while ignoring groups who are taking advantage of the word, and using it for clout and profit. That is exactly why I started this LONG essay with why this whole thing is a bad-faith argument.

it is weird to us that eeveecraft is willing to acknowledge issues with alexandra david-neel, while deflecting issues that arise from the terminology coined by her. she may be dead, but the cultural appropriation she committed is still alive and well today, and will be for as long as tulpamancy terminology remains in use.

we understand the frustrations with not wanting the community's path to be dictated by outsiders. however, this language does affect many outsiders (i.e. asian buddhists and practitioners of vajrayana buddhism). it also does seem like there may be many people within the tulpa community who are uncomfortable with this language and want to shift away, but their voices are buried or silenced by others within the community.

you can't say "some people who believe tulpa is appropriative have good intentions," then follow that with "sysmeds will take advantage of that and weaponize others while claiming to be racially-sensitive." that attempts to negate and cast aside the real concerns of those who have issues with this language and want their voices to be acknowledged and included in the conversation. in this way, eeveecraft, you weaponize the voices of anyone worried about the racism of this terminology, by lumping them in with sysmeds so that you can ignore their valid concerns.

we are not attempting to ignore groups who are taking tulpamancy terminology and using it for clout and profit. we genuinely will take some time to learn about tulpamancy in popular media (specifically aforementioned supernatural, the mandela catalogue, and slenderman) in order to speak up against the use of culturally appropriative language. we just felt the need to address the problems in our own home (tumblr, and the plural community here) before stepping outside our front door. we can't be expected to properly or accurately discuss issues that we were never made aware of, because we just hadn't been exposed to it before.

we did not make that document in bad faith. we have never argued against tulpamancy in bad faith. we are not a sysmed, and in fact are vehemently pro-tulpa and accepting of systems of all origins. however, as we learn more about racism and struggle to call it out and come to terms with its existence within our own communities, we can no longer continue to support tulpamancy language in good faith.

we know this was incredibly, incredibly long. if you've stuck with us this far, thank you so much for reading. we are not an expert on tulpamancy, though we have been involved in the community for a while. we're no expert on race, cultural appropriation, buddhism, or anything that we've talked about today, really. we're just a system who truly cherishes the plural community, trying to confront our own internalized biases and sharing how we feel about this response to our document.

thank you for your time. take care.

#syscourse #tulpamancy #tulpacourse #pro tulpa #anti tulpa terminology #racism

30 notes · View notes

the1975attheirverybest · 28 days

Note

that anon is right though that was bad even coming from an evil person like you

You have no idea what you’re talking about bro.

Believe it or not, there’s more to the story than what you see. Most of the time there’s more to the situation than you know. Like yeah sure I do get random ass hate asks every once in a while. And those are always funny to me because they tell on themselves so bad.

But believe me, the shit that people do to me on a personal level? You’d cry and be brought to your knees if you had to do deal with it. Simply for existing on tumblr and being into the 1975. I’m not as big of an idiot as you like to think. Your hatred of me has so blinded you to the situation. There’s more than meets the eye. People have done some illegal shit to try to bring me down personally.

So, I am sorry if, for a few hours last night, I contemplated deleting the fuckin blog because the anti-Palestinian sentiment and people trying to actually hurt me in real life and not just by sending meaningless hate online kind of got to me and affected my mental health. You don’t know shit. So shut the fuck up and consider that maybe JUST MAYBEEEE I know a little more than you do. And maybe just maayyybbbeee I’m not sharing everything I know because I’m actually a decent ass person. And even though some people actively inflict harm upon me, I genuinely believe that they’re coming from a bad place and they’re going to one day regret it and I don’t want to permanently ruin their lives or any chance of them having a peaceful existence online. Have you ever considered that? No cuz you can’t imagine yourself having compassion for someone who hates you so you assume I wouldn’t either.

All of this is besides the point though. This is my blog. I will say and do whatever the fuck I want. I’ll leave and come back as I please. If you don’t like it, unfollow and block me.

I won’t pray that you’d ever experience half the hate and vitriol that is directed at me on a DAILY FUCKIN BASIS because I genuinely do not wish that kind of pain on anyone. Not even my worst enemies. Go ahead and believe whatever you want. Say whatever you need to say to be able to sleep at night. What you see happening on my page is the tip of the iceberg baby. The shit that’s on my shoulders? Nobody knows about. And I have kept it that way for a reason. No matter how hard people like you try, you’re not going to turn this into a negative space. Hate me I don’t care. But I recommend for your sake that you consider for a fraction of a second that you do not know everything about everyone. And that maybe you’re wrong sometimes.

Fuckin hell what an entitled moron.

2 notes · View notes

fangirlies · 1 year

Note

BESTIE YOU WON'T BELIEVE IT BUT THAT REQUEST WITH OLDER XAVIER WAS MINE YJWTKATKATKTAKTAKATK AAAAAAA

I'M SO HAPPY WITH IT!! I knew who to entrust it! Omg😭😭😭 it really made my day and made me so soft and happy. Thank you! You're killing it again! When I sent this, request I was at quite a low point and it was quite a struggle (still is tbh) and I just wanted something THIS comforting, peaceful and serene AND YOU SERVED IT!! And Lover by Taylor?? THAT'S LITERALLY ONE OF MY FAVOURITE SONGS BY HER! I think it's right next to Paper rings. Sometimes I like something romantic hahaha. Well, that was definitely a treat! Teasing, cocky, but soft Xavier> > > > > 💜 And also oldet Xavier out of Nevermore just hits differently. Give me that man! That fic is amazing, bestie! I hope you feel your pretty forhead getting kissed.

Regarding bugs😰 I FEEL YOU. I literally cannot function when I see even one of them. I don't care if they're harmless, they harm me on every emotional lvl just with their presence. But grasshoppers are the worst😭😭 why these mf have to be so creepy and also jump so high??

I'm majoring in a linguistic of some sorts. I've just always loved English and wanted to have it more present in my life, but at my college, at least my major, really sucks.

Not us just clowning on Xavier's name lmao😂 imagine annoying him with that. I would've had a blust lmao

AGAIN THANK FOR MAKING MY REQUEST SOSOSO GOOD! LOVE YOU

- elliot anon

NAUR BESTIE THIS IS SO FUNNY! MAKES IT EVEN MORE SPECIAL TO KNOW TOU REQUESTED IT BEFORE EVEN BEING KNOWN AS MY ELLIOT ANON. I was literally in the deepest writers block and even considered deleting my blog but thanks to yours and many others that literally dragged me out of it with your requests!

I know what it feels like to come on here and escape things you’re facing in real life. Tumblr and all of you are safe place. Thank you for trusting me to fulfill something you had in mind and I’m so glad it brought you some sort of comfort. Wish I can do more on my part but you know I’m always here to listen. I certainly imagine xavier a cocky and annoying boyfriend and I feel like I did a good job of it on this one shot! I’m lowkey proud of it! I definitely felt your lil kiss<33

Gross I can’t even relive my experience last night. And are grasshoppers a big deal where you are? I don’t think I’ve ever seen one in real life 💀 I hear them and they’re kinda relaxing but I would DIEE if i witnessed it jump.

Ooo it sounds like a fun major, ya know besides it not being so great at your college :( what other languages do you know/speak?

You would definitely have a field day 😭😭 but imagine him acting all annoyed about it but deep down he enjoys hearing your laugh and would let you clown him just to keep that smile on your face. I’ll see myself out bestie I’m sorry.

#fangirliestalk #Elliot anon talks

3 notes · View notes

faerune · 1 year

Note

Hi my love! This is a really random question and you absolutely don’t have to answer. But from one writer to another, I wanted to ask you something!

I’m doing basically a book which follows the TWD episodes/seasons as they are, but with an added OC who becomes a romantic “thing” with Daryl already in season 2/3. I have been really struggling with the infamous Daryl and Beth scenes when they’re on their on the run, and I could just use some unbiased advice! I don’t know whether to rewrite it to have it be a time for OC and Daryl to bond by themselves, maybe become official, whether it should be Daryl, Beth and OC somehow or whether it should just be Daryl and Beth still? I still want Beth’s death to impact Daryl in some way, but I’m trying to figure out how to do that without those scenes being there, so that I can instead use them to solidify Daryl and OCs relationship situation. You absolutely don’t have to answer, but I’ve been suffering from such heavy writers block due to this, so I thought I’d ask considering you have an OC with Daryl yourself and I love your blog/work. xx

Uh well I guess when I make OCs to write into media, I try to add rather than take away. Like I used the group being separated in S4 as a way to develop Tess on her own and explore some of her characterization, put her into new challenges. I try to avoid having an OC follow their canon love interest around the story like a puppy and develop other relationships/things outside of that character.

I don't know about anybody else but I know when I read Canon/OC fic I'm not a big fan of reading the same scenes that happened in the show I already watched just with an OC pasted over a canon character. And like you said Daryl and Beth’s few days together are big for both of their characters as a whole so honestly I might suggest finding a different way to ‘solidify’ a relationship.

I’m also not really sure Daryl would be up for a romantic relationship in s2/s3, he’s kind of just getting his bearings as a member of a group and relying on people besides himself and his shithead brother but that’s just me.

#asks

2 notes · View notes

13curses · 2 months

Text

‧₊ ⊹˚﹒ LAWS TO ABIDE BY ﹒✮ ˚₊‧

do not interact: minors*, ageless blogs, bigots. racists, ableists, lgbtphobes. israel supporters, zionists.

read my warnings / tags so you don’t fall into any unsavory situations ! i do not condone many of (the darker content) which i write irl, these are not real life expectations, but i love writing nasty stuff.

soft / hard block to break the mutual. i’m not ur fan anymore

nsfw content will be posted & reblogged w/o content warning. only up for 18+ interactions, as this entire blog is (besides sfw fics)

i occasionally reblog snakes—always tagging with tw snakes

prompts are appreciated marvelously ! but i have the rights to reject any material i find myself uncomfortable with. repetition won’t work, therefore . . no means no.

reblogs are so appreciated you have 0 idea. especially if followed by any singular hashtag = it multiplies my motivation ! ☆

asks are very much open 4 anything ever. just be respectful ♡ love yous

*it’s given that with sfw works it’s fine, but my blog has several unfiltered nsfw content scattered around. i know you will lurk anyhow — nobody became interested in smut the day they turned 18 — but respecting adult spaces is highly appreciated & i strongly advise you on practicing internet safety as well as avoiding mindless p*rn consumption especially at a young age.

reader is generally described as afab!, shorter/smaller than their partner & submissive. i do not describe body parts or features thoroughly as they’re imagined by you, but if there’s a specific thing i’m featuring on purpose (ex. big breasts, thick thighs, piercings etc.) i’ll warn them ! requests regarding this are welcome — but race is never specified.

not writing: incest, noncon, piss / scat / vomit play, kidnapping, feet fētish, roleplaying noncon (other normal fun lil roleplays r fine), aged up minors, heavy drug use . .

this list will be upgraded as stuff comes to mind (i’m not a kink-encyclopedia) so if something’s not mentioned here but i reject a req, do not hold it against me !

will include substance use & how i think fictive characters would react to those substances, with as much personal experience/accuracy as possible

will post irregularly due to uni & work — & as often as i please, i might pump out a lot of fics spontaneously then go on a writing slump

i'll most likely note on an original piece if i intend on writing a part 2

oh yea, english is not my native language

#₊ ˚ ⊹ rules ✮.ᐟ‎

5 notes · View notes

obervation-subject-753 · 6 months

Text

(dec 5, 2023) uhhh first rant/venting post on this blog, if you don’t want to hear me rambling about my personal problems, block/don’t look through my tag ‘#subject-753’s scribbles’

so idk if i’m depressed. i’m pretty sure it’s because i don’t have much of a social life.

i realized around end of high school that the only friends i ever had were from school.

up to this day, besides relatives i suppose, i can’t even semi-confidently say that i have one friend. rather, irl friend..like, i know much about them and vice-versa. i haven’t talked with them in months.

i’m not blaming either of my parents for the next blurb i’ll vom out

recently (almost a month later) my mom had a stroke, and she’s home now, recovering well.

i’m the only person that can take care of her basically 24/7. i love my family. i love my mom dad and sibling. i can’t blame any of them for me questioning if i’m in a not-so-great mental state rn

but soon, i’ll be the only person that can stay home with her (my dad will go back to work in a few weeks)

i love my mom and i’ll never blame her for me feeling this way.

i don’t know if it’s because i don’t have much drive for anything (really is a big part of it honestly) or i’m an introvert (not anti-social, just difficult for me to socialize with people i don’t know well)

i just…feel so alone. i know i have a loving and supporting family..but idk if they will be as supporting if i try to explain to them more of the lgbtqia+ community that i’m a part of, bc most of my immediate family are rather ignorant or intolerant of trans, and most likely gay people too.

i. i like to think i’m an honest person. i’m really not. only when i’m alone with myself i say my true opinions and feelings. especially when i’m crying alone in my bed at night, most likely quietly bc i still live with my parents and sibling. i do that too often.

all that accumulates, and makes me not like myself. maybe even not love myself. most likely the latter.

i want to be better, for myself and others..but living and life is just so hard. most likely because i’m not trying enough bc i think i don’t deserve it or i don’t think a world like this is worth living in.

no i never attempted to harm myself, but i have thought of what possible painless ways to go.

yeah i’ve been thinking about all this for a few (7/8? years?) years…and i really don’t know if i can ever stop quietly cry in my room or feel comfortable enough to tell my close and loved ones that i feel and think this way.

fandoms i’m in help me cope, but also heavily reminds me of my personal problems. a double-edged sword if you will.

i confide in fictional characters for comfort. that’s just sad. i know they’re all fake and i’ll never be able to truly get to know them like i want to. they’re all fake. not in the reality i live in.

the reason why i’m only now making these feelings and thoughts of mine known, i think is because now i have even less of a chance to tell someone close to me. my family’s going though a hard time adjusting and dealing with the recent event with my mom, and i need to stay relatively strong for them. but i do know that we care about the well-being of each other.

i really want to have a genuine, not forced, relationship with someone. i really don’t want to burden my family with what i’m going through. tumblr and games and fanfiction have been such a break for me from my real life. not to say that social media and entertainment don’t bring up real life problems and how to deal/solve them, some thankfully successfully do, but there’s only so much we can do.

life can easily be cut short. i don’t want to live like i’m trudging though the mud, nor do i want to life completely carelessly…i’d like to live a nice life where i helped people.

especially a life where i somewhat helped myself.

#subject-753’s scribbles

0 notes

beautifulpersonpeach · 2 years

Text

Repost: Ask on Navigating Fandom (1)

Anonymous: Excuse me for saying this but ure so unusual. U've clearly been in the fandom for a long time but u have views that would get u tarred & feathered on twitter like the fansites and shipping. U scold the fans but also know a lot about the history to defend them. U like jikook but u say u have rapline bias becoz how many rapline bias care about maknae line? Not Many! It's like u follow some rules and not other rules. How do u figure all of this out?

***

Hi Anon, I’m not sure if you’re the same anon that sent a related ask, but since this is less explicit, I’m posting this to respond to.

No offense, but I feel a lot of people who ask questions like this, i.e. there’s so many rules and worry about how to be a fan, are people who to some degree perhaps care a bit too much about what other people think about them.

Before I get into all the rest, I’ll sum it up this way: the best way to be a fan is to spend time on what you enjoy related to that thing/person/group. Some people like to casually engage and that’s okay. Some people are natural hobbyists and like to commit more time and their personal skill towards it including making fan-made merch to sell on Etsy, curating playlists, making edits, running music blogs etc. Some people have natural leadership qualities and start/join fanbases, write up guides, and organize catalogs and/or local meets with other fans. Some people feel comfortable being responsible for translation or voting accounts. Some people invest their time in voting, buying, streaming, etc, because this is how they’d like to support a group they love. All of this is okay and you’ll find every single type of this fan in the fandom. Note this also applies to people who are ‘fans’ but of a different kind: antis. Antis are actually very invested in the groups they dislike, and they also come in all the forms I described above, it’s only they expend their time and efforts towards doing the opposite: unrelenting criticisms, comparisons, dehumanizing, making hate blogs/youtube channels, etc.

My point is, the actions or the way you express your interest in something are varied and ultimately doesn’t really matter (of course if you’re being abusive, racist, transphobic, or dehumanizing that’s obviously problematic), what matters is the motive or heart behind it. If you’re the type to not memorize lyrics because it’s just not your thing but you try to find out what they’re singing about because you care about what they have to say, that’s okay. If you don’t memorize lyrics because you think Korean sounds gross and just want to listen for the instrumentals and overall vibes, you’re getting a side-eye from me. But again, nobody is stopping you from doing it either. You’re in your house, I’m in mine. You can log off or block me, and I can do the same.

For example, I have all kinds of asks sitting in my inbox, not deleted for any other reason besides that I find them amusing. To be clear, I’m not referring to people who ask me weird or unusual things out of curiosity (I see you guys and I’ll get to you soon but honestly half the stuff y'all are sending me are better dealt with in DMs :)). I’m referring to ARMYs and antis who need an outlet for really toxic shit, and have somehow decided I, ARMY, BTS, or all three should be targets of that. So I ignore it. The antis who make repeat visits to my inbox are for all intents and purposes, a bunch of binary code: a series of ones and zeros, like any other dimwit on the internet. It’s an occupational hazard of spending a lot of time in big online communities. To be very honest, this is how I see it.

A lot of people would prefer to have their views unchallenged, and the way they deal with that is something that’s easy to predict, because in general, people are people. We’re not that different.

Of course, many people have a problem with someone being racist, so if you are, well a lot of people will have a problem with that lol. In my post here I talk about some common ideas ARMYs have about BTS just as a natural consequence of listening to things they’ve said and done repeatedly over years and years. I personally think that if you take the time to really listen to BTS and have a good awareness of the ecosystem in which they operate, there are only few conclusions to reach.

My approach to most things is if something makes sense to me, then cool! If it doesn’t, well then it’s not my problem, and this is something I generally apply to BTS and ARMY (there are exceptions). And this is how I navigate discussions or arguments on ARMY Twitter as well.

I had one yesterday with an ARMY about merch prices where my position was: 'listen, BTS merch prices are on par with their Western counterparts. Billie Eilish’s pajamas set goes for about $150, and so as a group that’s on par with most big Western acts, those prices are expected. However, a good chunk of the fandom is still firmly in the k-pop sphere, and compared to merch prices in k-pop, BTS’s seems ridiculous plain and simple. And this is something the company should be aware of and it’s a good idea to include this in their considerations next time.“ The ARMY I was replying to had a problem with everything I said after “However”, but I’d stated my views because it was a conversation I was interested in contributing to, and left it at that. If that army became abusive or really weird, it would’ve been a block and report sitch and we’d all be happy lol.

Personally, there are a few lines I do not cross at all when discussing Asian artists. For example, I have opinions on many k-pop idols but feel no need to express negative views about any of them unprompted, based solely on my perceptions, for any substantial period of time online. <- This is an action that doesn’t make sense to me. If I enjoyed doing this, I would, but I don’t, so I don’t. I also do not entertain any further commodification of any of these artists because I see how this is disproportionately applied to Asian people in general i.e. the token Asian in the friend group, in Western movies, or the Western music landscape. Some people are comfortable doing this, and they will continue because ultimately no one can stop them (or you) from doing what you want. You can always block them, make a new account, find people who think like you, etc. All the sub-sets in the fandom exist because we don’t all agree about everything all the time. Find the one you click with and roll with it.

Good luck 💜.

Originally posted: January 21st, 2022 11:45am

#repost #bts fandom #bts army #fandom behavior

0 notes

isthisthingeven0n · 4 years

Text

someone special : s.r

something a bit different, as this is a vs blog - but i wanted to give it a shot!

penelope is determined to find out who is keeping you up at night, but when you refer to the someone in question as ‘no one special’ the statement breaks your secret boyfriends heart. (1.7k)

Walking into the bullpen, you dump the files back onto your desk before sitting down. “Someone had a late night, huh?” Morgan remarks as you yawn loudly, unable to conceal it in time.

“Had a lot of paperwork to finish, nothing new.” You shoot back as you glance up, seeing Spencer at his desk beside yours with a small smile playing on his lips.

“I don’t think so sweet cheeks,” Garcia speaks up, and you sigh quietly. “you’re tired, your hair is out of place and you wore those pants yesterday.”

Looking down at your appearance, you mentally swear. “I was in a rush, no big deal, Pen.” You chuckle, but you can’t help noticing the look shared between the devious duo. “You guys,” You start, but Garcia can’t help but squeal quietly.

“Who is he?” She asks now perching on the edge of your desk as she slides your papers away, blocking Spencer from the corner of your eye.

“And why’d you think I’m seeing someone?” Leaning back in your chair, Garcia clicks her tongue before resting a hand on your shoulder.

“Because my sweet angel, I know you all too well. That smile on your face hasn’t been wiped in weeks, and I doubt it’s caused by anyone here, besides me of course.” Derek scoffs lightly as he wanders out toward his own office, leaving you and Garcia to talk whilst Spencer eavesdrops.

“It could be a number of things, you know.” You comment, opening up one of your files, only for Garcia to close it again.

“I will find out who he is, I know people, Y/n.”

Quirking an eyebrow to the blonde, you cross your arms over your chest as you turn in your chair. “Such as?”

“Kevin.” She mutters, and you smile softly upon hearing the sound of Spencer chuckling over Garcia’s shoulder. “Reid, we’re having girl talk over here, shush.”

Moving out of the way, you catch Spencer’s gaze for a split second before he averts his eyes back to his files. But as always, it’s long enough to make your heart beat faster.

“Come on, just tell me who this guy is!” Garcia whines as she stands up, hands resting on her hips as you groan, running your fingers through your hair.

“Penelope, he’s no one special alright? Now, I’ll tell you what you wanna know later, I just need to finish this report, how’s that?” You answer her prayers, and she claps her hands together as she grins brightly to you.

“You are my angel child, I can’t wait to hear all about your new Prince Charming.” And with that, Garcia turns on her heels and you let out a small sigh before looking over to Spencer, only to see his brows furrowed and fingers clenched into his palms.

Rising to your feet, you head over to grab a coffee, knowing Spencer would be in need of one too. It wasn’t a lie, technically it wasn’t. You had stayed up late to finish your paperwork, but you just happened to have some company to pass the time by as well.

With two coffees in hand, one being overly sweetened you placed it on Spencer’s desk. “Thought you might want this.” You mutter with a smile, but Spencer doesn’t even look up at you. “I hope it’s sweet enough, just how you like it.”

Even with that, Spencer doesn’t react. “Thanks.” He mutters under his breath, hiding his face with his left hand as he rests his elbow on his desk, blocking you out.

“Okay then.” You whistle, turning back to your own desk, wondering what’s going on in that brilliant mind of his.

After a few hours, you’re all called into the board room for a meeting.

Pushing your chair back, usually, Spencer waits for you and walks alongside you about a variety of things, discreetly asking about your plans for the evening. Yet, as you rise to your feet, Spencer shoots off without you.

As you walk in, the seat he usually sits in is absent. Looking around, you spot him in the far corner, isolated from everyone else as he keeps his head buried in another book, a different one from last night (which isn’t surprising.)

“We’ve got a debriefing tomorrow afternoon,” Hotch announces now that everyone is present, and you tear your focus away from your boyfriend, forcing yourself to ignore the thoughts circling your mind as Hotch explains the protocol for the next day.

Weirdly, the rest of your day followed the same suit. Spencer ignoring you, or going out of his way to avoid any encounter with you.

“Okay my loves, I bid you adieu.” Garcia blows a kiss to you as she leaves whilst you carry on working, knowing it’ll be an hour or so before you head out yourself.

Another yawn escapes your lips as your eyes continue to grow heavy, causing words in your files to blur together.

“You know, around 1 in 3 adults don’t get enough sleep, that’s roughly 51% worldwide, but I guess those who do are lucky, then again, no one special, right?” Spencer comments, catching you off guard as you look over, seeing him wearing his glasses as his lips remain tightly shut as he focuses on you before raising an eyebrow.

“I, I guess not.” You respond, unsure for his sour tone before you return to your paperwork, trying to contemplate his reasoning for the silence and sudden remark.

Your ears perk up to the sound of Spencer rustling his papers before grabbing his satchel. “Bye Hotch,” He waves up to Hotch in his office, but no response is received as Spencer lowers his hand.

“Do you want a ride?” You speak up, playing with your pen as you look up at him, only to see Spencer shake his head.

“I could use the fresh air, think about things.” He tells you and walks out, not even saying anything.

Annoyance rises through your system and you close your files, knowing they’re pretty much done and grab your bag before following Spencer out of the building.

“What is with you today?” You yell from the safety of the parking garage, seeing Spencer up ahead as he stops and turns to face you. “You’ve ignored me all day, did I do something to upset you last night? Did I kick you again?”

Spencer grits his teeth before looking right at you. “No, no you didn’t kick me, Y/n.” He retorts, catching you off guard. In all your time of knowing Spencer, and in the last three months of dating him, he’s never been angry at you, nor lost his temper for that matter.

“Then what is with you today?” You ask, raising your arms as Spencer scoffs.

“You seriously don’t know?”

“Unlike some people Spencer, I don’t have an eidetic memory, so no I have no idea what is bothering you!” You huff, stepping back as Spencer simply nods, adjusting his grip on his Satchel strap.

“This morning, 9:36am. Garcia was asking if you were seeing anyone, and you said it was no one special. So, I’m obviously not that special to you, Y/n.” You can hear the pain in Spencer’s tone as his eyes dart away from yours, and his lips turn down. “Good to know that all of this, what we had wasn’t that meaningful to you.”

“Wait, Spence,” You call out as he begins to walk away, this time refusing to turn back. “that’s not what I meant at all. I just, fuck,” You sigh, unable to move your feet. “I’m scared, okay?”

“Of what?” Spencer questions as his voice echoes through the walls whilst his back remains turned.

Standing still, you fiddle with the hem of your jumper, pulling at the loose threads. “I’m scared of what this means, and the fact I’m falling for you Spencer Reid, and that I don’t want to lose you in my life.” You can feel your eyes welling up, but fight back tears as Spencer slowly looks over his shoulder, seeing you curled up into yourself as you stand still, desperate to hear him say something. “And if I ruined this, I’m sorry, but please, don’t ignore me forever.”

A tear falls down your cheek and before you can wipe it away, Spencer walks over and brushes it with his thumb. His large palm rests on your left cheek as you lean into it.

“I’m sorry for hurting you, Spence.” You mutter, closing your eyes as Spencer moves his hand to bring you closer into his chest, holding you tightly and not wanting to let go.

Resting his chin on the top of your head, Spencer shushes you. “Don’t be sorry, Y/n. If anything, I should be sorry for doubting you. I just, ever since Maeve, I’ve been so scared to open up like this.”

Removing yourself from his tight embrace, you focus on his big doe eyes. “I know, Spence. But you’re doing it, and she’d be proud of you.” You remind him, and Spencer simply nods as he sniffs lightly.

“I, what you said earlier, about falling for me?” Spencer starts as his hands find yours, taking them into his. “I think, no, I know I’m falling in love with you, Y/n. And whatever that truly means, because love is just a chemical reaction caused by the brain receiving oxytocin which is the love hormone, and-”

“Spence,” You giggle quietly, and Spencer just smiles back at you. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Y/n, so much.” He mutters, leaning down and kisses you softly before you wrap your arms around his neck, deepening the kiss between you both.

As Spencer pulls away, you breathe shallowly as he chuckles. “You know, an adult is supposed to get eight hours of sleep a night, and of late you’ve been getting half of that.”

“What’re you saying, Doctor?” You ask with a small smirk.

“Let me drive you home, and get some needed sleep, alright?” Spencer holds his hand out, waiting for your car keys.

You grab your keys, hovering them over his palm. “You know, if I have to get eight hours of sleep, we’ll have to postpone our nighttime activities for a while.”

Taking your keys from you, Spencer sighs as he unlocks your car and opens the passenger door for you. “We’ll work on your sleep schedule next week.” He remarks as he shuts your door, leaving you to lull into the seat as he climbs in and starts the car.

“Just as I thought, Doctor Reid.”

#i hope you enjoyed reading this!#i might do more in the future idk yet #spencer reid #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid imagines #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid angst #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid oneshot #spencer reid au #criminal minds #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds imagines #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds fluff #criminal minds angst #criminal minds oneshot #criminal minds au

2K notes · View notes

sk-lumen · 3 years

Note

Hello dear enchantress Lumen,

I hope you are well and safe♥️ I just came here to seek for some advice from you and ladies out there if possible. I often get men complimenting me on my eyes and lips, more so my lips (I know damn well what they’re thinking about while they’re at it lol) but it’s become frustrating and to a point where I am objectified because of my looks.

I feel like I am a shell with a pearl inside- weird comparison I know but men just rather focus on what’s on the outside paying little attention to what may be inside. I like talking about mind stimulating stuff and the conversations get dragged to sexual stuff. While I am playful being sexually objectified is really a buzz killer 😞They start asking for naughty pictures and such. Every conversation I make online or in person with men has to always start with me addressing the fact that I do not send nude photos or videos.

I do understand that men naturally have a big appetite for sexual things. My question is dear Lumen; How do I deal with men like that? To have them to see more than and past my looks, but the beauty within? And also how can I keep the sexual thing playful yet not super nudity type? (Like for eg can I pose half nude or wear things to still keep his i terest but playful enough to leave the rest of my body to his imagination, hopefully enabling him to see me for my soul as well) Please tell me tips you would think be best in how to keep men going sexually but not getting things over done, how to handle situations like this, etc)

Your advice and tips are highly valued and appreciated by me. Thankyou in advance. ♥️♥️

Hi darling,

Note: you pose some very good questions which is why I thought it's important to share it with others. I will mention that advice requests, which are slightly more explicit in nature, should be redirected to my personal inbox where I can reply in-depth: either in private, or share on the blog to help others as well. I'm happy to help, however such topics are not the main focus of my tumblr blog, which I would like to keep as a more light and safe space, welcoming to all regardless of goals or sensibilities. I'm open to everyone else's thoughts on this suggestion.

After reading your story, let me address each topic one by one:

You may be looking for gentlemen in the wrong circles. There is a repeating pattern here, and it is either from navigating the same circles, or attracting the same type of guys, or simply being surrounded by the same type in your local area. For this, I would advise to experiment and try new places more associated with higher value men (theatre, art exhibitions, museums, upscale restaurants, etc).

This whole trend with provocative photos is simply a result of the p*rn culture combined with consumerism, which has normalized the access to/objectification of female bodies as a product so to speak. Yes, it is unquestionable that the female body is a work of art - but unfortunately today's society does not yet understand this. Ignore the trend of n*des. Do not for a second succumb to it unless you are in a 100% committed relationship, completely trust your partner, and feel very much safe to do so — and even then, thoroughly considered. Is it worth risking things like having those photos leaked, your privacy and trust broken, just for a nondescript guy’s validation? The smart answer is simple: never.

Generally speaking, women have an equally big appetite. It’s simply about how both genders (or any gender) are socialized in expressing it. LVM learn that they can express it any way they wish, HVM act as gentlemen, as they should; whereas women oscillate between the double-edged blade of being too little or too much, either way facing risking judgement over it.

How to deal with low value men (because no man of class would ask for licentious photos, and I stand by that statement)? Block, delete, move on. If you are determined to embark on a journey of leveling up, you cannot waste time with such behaviour, dear ladies. There’s zero benefit, zero return of investment from engaging with men that have not yet reached the baseline of respecting you as an individual. There's no two ways about this, and there’s nothing to negotiate there.

You can’t make a man see, do or say anything. He either sees your value or he doesn’t. If you have to bring arguments to the table, the game is already rigged and you have lost, because the moment you question your worth is when they have already won. The only thing you should do then is find another table.

"Can I (…) to keep his interest" - Please don’t entertain this line of thought darling, it serves no one but LVM. You don’t have to do anything to keep someone’s interest, except be yourself. If you have to go above and beyond, bend over backwards, be someone you’re not, or step out of your comfort zone/boundaries at any point, it’s time to walk away. Besides, a man's interest is not a warranty for commitment or love.

Don’t rely on the mindset of luring in a guy with desire, to capture his heart. It should be the other way around, or simultaneous. But if he desires solely your body before even considering your mind, heart or soul… his priorities are clear, and they’re not likely to change.

My universal strategy for dating/relationships, which is in the best interest of your sacred feminine energy, the safeguarding of your heart, and the wise use of your time, is this:

Have clear standards, know what kind of man you’re interested in, take your time dating accordingly. When you find a good one, let him court you until he’s proven himself as a worthwhile companion that you can trust with all of you. Once commitment is made clear (and I mean clear, open commitment stated out loud, no juvenile "what are we" allusions), wait at least 3-6 months to further strengthen the relationship’s foundation of intimacy, and only then open completely.

It may sound complicated or long-winded, but it is a smart strategy for countless reasons: only a HVM will be patient, consistent and dedicated enough to stay for the long run all throughout. LVM will either bail, protest, test your boundaries, or other red flags which will reveal themselves on their own and spare you the trouble.

Hope this helps. Take care. ❤️

-Lumen

#glow up #dating advice #relationship advice #(note: should i tag such posts? with warnings or anything just in case?)#(i'm very mindful of any sensibilities)#ask

70 notes · View notes

princecharmingmendes · 3 years

Text

Heart by Heart | Chapter IV | Raul Mendes

*secret agent AU*

Y/N and Raul have been friends ever since they could remember. And falling in love with your best friend can be pretty tricky and messy 99% of the times, add that to the fact they're constantly risking their lives side by side on the field since they're both secret agents, and the best team that's ever existed. Perfect recipe for disaster.

Hi, this is the fourth chapter, you can find the first one here. This one's a bit shorter but I still hope you like it anyway. Please read the warnings on this one, if you don't feel comfortable with the contents listed on the "warnings" section, please read something else, there are a lot of other works on my masterlist and on the "fic rec" hashtag on my blog. Please give me some feedback and I hope you guys like. Happy Reading!

previous chapter | masterpost | next chapter

*Word Count: 2.9K+.

*Warnings: cursing, jealousy, mentions of weapons (barely any), slight angst (if you squint).

Please don’t read it if any of this subjects make you uncomfortable, feel free to check my masterlist for other writings.

*Posted: July 22nd, 2021.

-*-

Raul was fucked.

He learned that ages ago, but every passing day, it just seemed to get more and more fucked.

Y/N was the most beautiful girl he’s ever laid eyes on, he knew that the day he met her all those years ago, while she was still a kid like him. And as the time went on, she proved him wrong every single day, every time he looked at her, in his eyes, Y/N surpassed her own beauty and taking her own title as the pretties one. Raul knew he was a goner the first time he made her laugh, truly laugh, throwing her head back as she almost lost her breath, he knew he would have to do it all over again for the rest of his life just to hear the most beautiful melody ever created.

And maybe he was a fool, and obvious one for not even holding back whenever she was hurt or needed him. He would give Y/N anything in the world and he could be pretty reckless about it. Sure, Raul was capable of keeping it to himself all these years, even from his spy family and her, but Peter was slowly catching onto it and he knew it. There was a reason why Peter wasn’t a field agent and his not so subtle approaches only proved that right. But he honestly didn’t care, as long as he got to have her as his best friend and best girl, he didn’t give a fuck about what the rest of the world thought. He only cared about Y/N.

So watching her progress on the ring (hell, having his ass kicked by her was probably the best thing that’s ever happened to him), watching Y/N taking part of such an important role as to plan the mission that would take down one of the biggest criminals on the world left him so proud. He couldn’t even describe it. Watching her sleep peacefully among his bedding, the glimmer of pure and utter happiness whenever she watched one of the marvel movies or ate her favorite cake made butterflies go wild in his stomach.

And as Aaliyah would say, he was probably a simp for her. As sappy as that sounded, it was probably true.

“Still with me, champ?” Y/N’s voice ringed on his coms.

Raul had to hold back a smile as Jack smirked at him on their watching point across the street “Always, doll, see anything?”

“Not really” she muttered annoyedly “think the package is late”

“Oh, sorry the bad guy didn’t show up on the perfect time according to your planner”

“Fuck you, darling, before I forget”

Raul huffed a chuckle as he changed channels on the surveillance system she hacked the night prior.

He was with Jack sitting on his apartment watching Y/N from the perfect window. The initial plan was pretty simple, Y/N would be dressed in casual common clothes, going through her computer on Genoff’s favorite coffee shop, to possibly catch him after coming back, so he could be used to some of their faces on his absence justifying new people around. Her undercover role was as a graphic designer that pretty much had a home office, which would justify her always being around that area. Tommy was the local barista trainee, summer job to pay for his scholarship, and this way he could hear some stuff and also be ready to jump and protect whoever was undercover there that day.

Celine was working on the front desk on Geonoff’s cover up business building, she was replacing the other girl that just left due to maternity leave, so it wouldn’t look suspicious at all. James got the work as an executive driver on a company that often was hired to transport Geonoff himself and his people, and Raul would also be on home office as a free lancer photographer, he’d be in an untitled relationship with Y/N which would be a good cover for them always being out and about together.

They would all be living in the same neighborhood, Peter and Celine would be living in the same apartment complex, which was just next doors to the one Jack, Y/N and Raul were placed. This way it would still be safe and pretty low profile enough to not draw curious eyes. And since the mission didn’t exactly have a precise deadline, they didn’t have a precise date to actually leave, so their flat was poorly furnished and decorated, filled with the ultimate basic things they could need in a month period. And of course, heavily armed in every corner and drawer anyone could think about.

“He just left his car two blocks away, think he might be just a bit behind your schedule, Y/N” Jack called from his place behind the screens she had set up the night before “Tommy, grab the cash register as soon as you can”

“Yes sir” Tom mumbled under his breath.

Raul inched a bit closer to the window on a spot no one could see him from bellow, watching as Geonoff himself entered the shop with two other man right behind him. Probably security team. He had to hold back his breath once he noticed the way the man had his eyes fixated right on Y/N’s table, before quietly muttering something to the other with him.

“Hm, excuse me miss?” a deep slightly hoarse voice caught her attention from the fake project displayed on her computer screen, Y/N looked up to find Geonoff right next to her booth.

“Oh hi”

“Why is he talking to her? He wasn’t supposed to just approach her!” Raul practically growled to Jack as the other just shrugged in response “fuck”

“Dude, calm down, Tom is literally just across the bar and she’s a fucking spy, chill, she knows how to handle this” Jack said shoving Raul’s shoulder playfully, to which he just rolled his eyes huffing in annoyance.

“I know, I know that”

Jack arched his eyebrow at him, a knowing smirk playing on his lips “Is this your way of admitting you love her?”

“Shut up and pay attention to their conversation, you idiot” Raul said pushing his friend off of his sit.

“I'm sorry, I just had to ask, I haven’t such a pretty girl like you around in a while, are you new in town, darling?” Geonoff asked leaning his hip against the sit across from Y/N.

“Oh no, not new in town” she responded with a giggle, trying to ease the nerves and slight nausea from talking to him and his half attempt of flirting “I moved to this neighborhood last month though, used to leave on the other side of the town”

“Oh, was it for work? How are you liking this place so far?”

“It’s nice, I thought it was going to be quieter but it doesn’t really bother me” she said with a soft smile on her features “I moved here because I work from home, so I needed to get out of my last place cause my roommate was not exactly quiet, and my boyfriend said there was an available apartment on his floor, so it just seemed like a great opportunity”

Raul’s heart raced a bit more on his chest when she referred to him as ‘boyfriend’, which was completely stupid. Y/N was his best friend and this was only for a cover. But sometimes his feelings got the best of him.

“Boyfriend? Is he here?”

“Oh no, I think he’s at work now, he’s a photographer”

“It makes sense, he has the prettiest muse at home” he added with a wink, which made Y/N’s stomach twirl in her tummy, this man is absolutely gross and she just wants to find a way out of this conversation “is he joining you today or should I keep you company?”

“Tell him I’m on my way, sweetheart, don’t want this man any closer to you” Raul said through coms, Jack already grabbing his backpack with the material they had separated to be Raul’s cover as he threw a denim jacket and a pair of glasses.

Y/N gave Geonoff a gentle smile as she shrugged before adding “he told me he’d be coming here, something about the cupcakes being the best he’s ever had”

“Oh shut up, this is the worst excuse to get me to buy you cupcake ever” Raul muttered through coms as he jogged across the street and Y/N had to cough to hid a little giggle that threatened to escape at her best friend’s comment.

“Yeah, they’re really good, I think you’d like the chocolate one”

“Okay, thank you for the tip” she said, quickly noticing the mop of curls clumsy coming into the shop, a big grin blossoming on her lips as she waved at the heaving figure of her best friend “oh, there he is!”

Raul’s eyes found hers and he could only smile, forgetting only momentarily that one of the most wanted man in the country was just beside her, he shook his head to gain a bit more focus as he shortened the distance between them with every step “hi baby”

Y/N got up from her sit and was quick to throw her arms around his neck, as he did the same with her waist, planting a kiss to the crown of her head “Hi, honey this is… Oh my, just realized I never caught your name, I’m sorry, that was so rude”

“Geonoff, darling” he said with a smug smile on his lips, probably waiting some sort of reaction and proud of it.

And to Raul’s amusement, Y/N didn’t move a single muscle, didn’t give a single reaction, only offering a polite smile “Oh, nice name, I’m Y/N and this is my boyfriend, Raul”

“Beautiful name, suits such a gorgeous girl like you” he said, eyes on Raul waiting for some sort of response.

“Oh yeah, she doesn’t like it but I’ve always found it beautiful” he said softly.

“Well, I’ll leave you guys alone now, nice meeting the two of you” Geonoff said as his guards approached him with a paper bag “and Y/N, let me know if you need anything, I’m always around”

“Thank you” she said before pulling Raul to sit by her side on the booth as Geonoff walked out of the little shop “how was your day, honey?”

“Good, angel, got a couple of photos I think you’d like to see whenever we get home” he said throwing his arms around her shoulders, pulling her closer.

“You two are gross to watch” Jack grumbled through the coms making them both laugh.

Y/N turned her head to face him “you wanna go home to show me or you want to grab a cup of coffee first?”

“I think I want a bit of coffee, but we can order it to go, yeah?”

“Sure, whatever you want” Y/N said before sliding off the booth and pulling him with her, before stuffing her computer on her little backpack, which Raul promptly took from her.

“Come on, baby, can’t wait to lay down a bit” he ushered her to the register, where Tom waited patiently for them “hello there, I’d like an espresso please”

“Sure, anything else?” Tommy asked as he clicked on the little screen.

“Do you want anything, baby?”

“A red velvet cupcake to go, please”

Tom nodded looking a little nervous before speaking up “the other man with the security guards left this note and cupcake for you, ma’am” he then grabbed the little pastry and a fancy business card alongside it.

“Oh, I- are you sure it was for me?” she asked in disbelief as Raul tightened his arm around her.

Tom only nodded in response “positive, do you still want the red velvet one?”

“I- yes, please” Y/N let out before almost chocking on air, gently grabbing the card that contained the business information from his company (that she already had) and a little handwritten phrase next to a phone number, the note read ‘if you’re ever looking for a real man, let me know’.

“Someone’s got a crush on you” Raul teased trying to mask the anger bubbling up on his throat, but he knew she saw right through his facade. After all, Y/N knew him better than anyone else.

“Well, I feel bad for him, because I’m already taken, yeah?” she giggled at herself, lightly poking his chest to try and loosen his nerves a bit.

“Yeah, since I have you, know that I’m never letting you go” Raul pressed a kiss to her head huffing a small chuckle.

“Here it is, sir” Tom cut Raul out before handing him the paper bag, and he placed the money on Tom’s hand.

Raul offered a smile as he lead Y/N back to their place “Thank you, take care, kid”

As they were crossing the street, Y/N dropped the cupcake from Geonoff on the sidewalk, making it look like an accident as she cried out an ‘oh no, I can’t believe I dropped it!’ before tossing it on the bin. On the elevator to their apartment, Raul still seemed tense and too quiet for his normal self, but Y/N decided to drop it, maybe give him some time to deal with today.

Just as they opened the door, Jack was quick to pull them inside, grabbing the card from Y/N’s hand and tossing it into a special bag and running downstairs, probably to deliver it to a team so they could take it to the lab to run some tests. Celine was stretched on the couch, a knowing look in her eyes as she signaled for them to join her. Raul went to the kitchen to grab a glass of water in complete silence as Y/N sank down on the soft cushions with Celine.

“What’s wrong with him?” she muttered quietly, since there were no walls separating the rooms on this flat, only the bedroom and bathroom and Raul was standing pretty close.

Y/N sighed with a shrug “No clue, maybe just didn’t expect the interaction to go like that, I don’t know”

“By the way, you did great, he even got interested in you”

“Ew, no need to remind me, seriously that man is just gross, there’s something about him that’s just creepy, and I’m not even bringing up his criminal record” Y/N added grabbing a bottle water that Raul tossed at her after she nodded at him.

Celine nodded in understanding “Don't blame you, I think I would’ve punched him five seconds into talking”

“You wouldn’t last a single second with him talking” Jack said as he closed the door behind him.

Y/N and Celine laughed as Raul joined them on the couch, sitting on the armrest right behind Y/N as she leaned her weight on him. He threw an arm around her.

“I think we should order a pizza and have some beer, yeah? This was a successful day, Tom’s gonna be here any minute now and Raul didn’t die out of jealousy in 24h, only reasons to celebrate!”

“Don’t start celebrating now, Jack, he might combust at any second now” Celine said with a laugh and Y/N giggled shaking her head, looking up at him only to see his serious expression and a light pink tinting his cheeks.

“So, pizza and beer it is?” Jack asked pulling his phone.

“I think it’s a great idea” Tom said as he climbed through the back window.

“Okay, Jack, order the pizzas and grab us the beer” Y/N decided and Jack stared at her in shock.

“Why me?!”

“So you can do something useful for once instead of gossiping” Raul said playfully and Y/N smiled at that as Jack feigned hurt with a dramatic gasp.

“Well, there’s that and the fact that this genius idea belongs to you, doesn’t it?” Y/N asked

Jack stared at her and nodded “Well yeah but-“

“Then make it happen, darling” Y/N only threw a wink at him and he shook his head, but grabbing his phone to start ordering.

“Hey Tom, can I see the piece you brought back?” Celine asked without moving from her place on the couch.

Y/N took the opportunity to properly face Raul since the others were seemingly busy, so she cupped his face gently bringing his attention down at her “are you okay?”

“Yeah, of course I am, doll” he said turning his face to place a kiss at the palm of her hand before looking back at her.

“Are you sure? You didn’t seem fine five minutes ago”

“I just didn’t think he’d take such an interest on you so soon, I mean, you’re insanely gorgeous so it was obvious he was going to notice you, I guess I was just unconsciously hoping he wouldn’t” Raul sighed leaning his head against her hand and she let it slide on his face until she was able to curl her fingers on his hair “it’s stupid, I’m sorry, I was just being stupid yeah? Let’s focus on something else and relax”

“Are you sure?” she asked tugging on his hair a bit as he closed his eyes, nodding his head softly and she sighed “okay”

-*-

*Please reblog or like this post if you liked it so I’ll know.

*I’m sorry if there are any spelling mistakes.

*Please do not repost this without giving me the credit, this is a completely original piece and I do not give permission to copy this!

*Hope you guys enjoyed it!

*xoxo

-🌙

47 notes · View notes