#so basically every few months I just suddenly remember and I go “oh right I have to shill for my game!”

[quibbs126]

Have you ever loved a game so much that you become instantly relaxed and uplifted just hearing the UI sound effects?

[reysdriver]

Phone Sex | E.M.

Day 7 of Kinktober: Phone Sex/Mutual Masturbation — eddie x fem!college!reader smut/a bit of fluff

Warnings: 18+, Minors DNI - smut, phone sex, dirty talk, mutual masturbation, pet names (baby, sweetheart), mentions of oral and piv sex

Words: 1.9k

a/n: I know it is absolutely not october anymore but I'm not quitting! I already made a post ab it but I'm gonna keep going until I hit at least 10 kinktober fics!

It’s been tough since you left for university. The feeling of withdrawal from Eddie was already setting in, even though you had only been away from your boyfriend for just about two weeks. The chaos of starting school had just been so much—from the hustle and bustle of orientation week to pages and pages of syllabi you had to read through and prepare for—you had barely spoken to Eddie for more than a few small, rushed phone conversations. 

You and Eddie had even made a big deal of buying a landline phone for your dorm room before you left along with one for his bedroom, and you two hadn’t even got to use them for more than half an hour total. 

But tonight was going to be the night. You had no assignments, and nothing else to do than call your boyfriend for as long as you both could stay awake. 

Taking the handset in your left hand and already holding it up to the side of your head, you dialled your favourite phone number in the entire world. 

You lied on your stomach against the mattress of your twin bed, listening closely to the dial tone. After a few seconds, Eddie answered and a smile tore across your face almost immediately. 

“You’ve reached the gates of hell; what can I do for you today?”

You bit your lip to stop yourself from laughing at his stupid way of picking up the phone. “You know it’s me, Eddie. Don’t try to scare me off.”

“I just had to make sure, sweetheart.”

You decided you would tease him for that. “Oh, you got a lot of people calling you at nine in the evening?”

“Nope. Just one special little lady calling from her smart people asylum.”

Another joke you weren’t going to give him the satisfaction of laughing at. “Good. I don’t want to have to beat any other girls away from you when I come back for Thanksgiving.” 

As soon as the words escaped your lips, you started to think about how far away that really was. It had been hard enough being away from each other for two months, you didn’t even want to think about being separate for two more months. 

Eddie was clearly thinking about this too, because he quickly changed the subject. “What about you, baby? Anyone you’re talking to late at night when you aren’t on the phone with me?”

“Nope. Just you, Eds.” You responded honestly. 

His tone changed from flirtatious to more sincere. “But you are making friends though, right? I don’t want you to have too good of a time, but I definitely don’t want you to be lonely.”

“I’m not lonely here, Eddie. Remember I told you about that group I eat dinner with? And I just joined a book club!”

“A book club, eh?” He tutted. “A shame. Bet they’re just gonna fill you up with the most basic of literature and turn you into a puppet for The Man.” 

This one, you did laugh at. You twirled the phone’s cord around your index finger as you crafted your response. “Don’t worry, Eds. There’s only one man I would be a toy for.”

You could practically hear your boyfriend’s jaw drop through the phone. 

“So it’s gonna be one of those phone calls, huh?” 

You suddenly lost a whole lot of your confidence. Did he just want to chat and catch up tonight? Was he thinking the sexual aspect of your relationship would be gone once you left for college?

“If you don’t want to, that’s okay.” You rushed to say. “I was just thinking we could have a little fun and then talk about everything else until we fall asleep—”

“Sweetheart, of course I want to. I just wanted to tease you a bit because I can’t do it every day in person like we’re used to.” He told you with a slight laugh. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. I would never pass up an opportunity like this with you.” 

That boosted your confidence back again. You shifted around to get as comfortable as you could on your tiny bed. “Oh, really? I’m that irresistible?”

“Of course.” He said honestly. “That’s why it was so hard to let you move away. Remember our last night together before you left?”

You absolutely remembered it. How could you forget? Although you had originally planned to go to bed early so you could get to school, Eddie had made you a romantic dinner at his trailer and he had ravished you all night as one of his goodbye presents to you. 

Although you stand by every one of your dates with Eddie being one of the best nights of your life, that one had to take the cake so far. 

“Yeah, I think it rings a bell.” You told him. “You want to try to recreate it like this?” 

“Like, by ourselves? Over the phone?” He paused for a moment while he pretended to think about your offer. “Well, I’m not sure you would be able to match the euphoria brought on by my special moves, but we can try it.” 

“Oh no.” You said with a giggle. “I don’t know how I’ll survive.”

“Well, you could start by taking off your pants. Wait, maybe I should ask what you’re wearing. What are you wearing, baby?” 

Eddie was just so incredibly funny without even trying sometimes. You thought it was so incredibly him to get caught up on something like that, but still be able to turn it around and try to make it sexy.

You looked down at your body when you realised you actually couldn’t remember what you had even put on that morning. “Um, your Judas Priest tee shirt, some jean shorts, and the black matching set you like underneath.”

Instead of being upset that you stole his shirt like you were slightly worried he would be, Eddie seemed to like your outfit. 

“That’s a good shirt; leave it on. But the bottoms can go.”

And you as he asked. You weren’t exactly sure how this was all going to go down, but you were excited nonetheless. Still lying down, you lifted your hips and shimmied out of your shorts. 

“And what about you? You’re not wearing one of my shirts, are you?”

He chuckled into the phone. “No, sorry to disappoint you, sweetheart, but I’m wearing a nasty old pair of jeans and my Ozzy shirt.”

“Well, that’s no problem. The nasty old pants can come off. Then we can match.”

“I love the way you think.”

You could hear the clinking sounds made by Eddie undoing his belt through the phone and it shot a wave of anticipation down your torso and right between your legs. You pictured your boyfriend with his phone held between his jaw and his shoulder, so excited for what you were engaging in that he just had to get his jeans off as soon as possible. 

“So,” Eddie started awkwardly, “Do you want to get all teasing with things or should we just get into it?”

You thought about it for a moment, then answered him. “I think we’ve been apart for too long. We shouldn’t deprive ourselves of each other for a second longer than necessary.”

“Amazing point, baby, as always.” There’s more shuffling on the other line, and you’re tempted to ask about it, but Eddie answers before you can even say anything. “Don’t mind me, just getting some lotion from the dresser. Not everyone here is as lubricationally gifted as you are, my dear.”

He was right; you were already getting wet. All you had done was think about the idea of you and Eddie getting off together, then you had taken off your jean shorts, and you had already made a mark on your underwear. 

You didn’t want to start anything without Eddie, so you just opened your legs and let anticipation pool between them. 

You could hear Eddie groan, then the springs of his old mattress creaked loudly. 

“Alright, babe, let’s get into it.” He said. “I mean, I can do my thing here. How about you bring a hand down there and start playing with your pussy?”

It was clear through Eddie’s over-the-phone dirty talk that he was new to this, but who were you to judge? You did just as he told you, taking two fingers and starting to tease your clit. 

The sounds of Eddie moving his hands up and down along his cock, muffled through the landline, just turned you on so much. Every few pumps, Eddie let out little grunts and moans, your favourite sounds. 

“I’ve missed you so much, baby.” He told you, still getting himself off. 

“I’ve been missing you too.” You replied sincerely. “I think about you every single day.”

You dipped two fingers into yourself and pumped them in and out, an attempt to replicate how your boyfriend can bring you to climax with just his fingers when he wants to. It worked somewhat; it was pleasing enough, especially when you used your thumb to rub your clit at the same time, but it just wasn’t Eddie’s fingers. 

“There’s been times where I’ve been in class, not paying attention to a single thing the professor was saying, just thinking about us in the back of your van or out by Lover’s Lake…” You admitted. 

Eddie seemed intrigued by this new idea. He absolutely knew what you were talking about, but he wanted to press more. “Yeah, tell me about that, sweetheart. What were we getting up to in the back of my van?” 

“Remember that picnic we had after graduation? I was running through that whole day in my head, like it was on loop. I loved that day so much. I love you so much, Eds.” 

He let out one loud moan that seemed to echo off the walls of his trailer. You knew exactly what that sound meant, but he confirmed it for you between heavy breaths anyways. 

“Shit, I just made a big ass mess on my shirt.” 

“Well, maybe when I’m done, I can make a mess on your shirt too.”

“Yeah, you just gotta keep going, playing with yourself. Are you thinking about my fingers, my mouth, or my dick?”

“Your fingers. I wish you were really here.” You sighed. “I’m close.”

Eddie told you to keep rubbing yourself and playing with your pussy, and you did so until you felt the knot in your stomach burst. 

You found yourself breathing heavily, just as Eddie was a moment ago, and now neither of you were saying anything. You held the handset of the phone against your chest and watched as it rose and fell with each deep inhale and exhale you took. 

Finally, you heard Eddie’s muffled voice and brought the phone back up to your head. 

“I was thinking I should make the drive up to see you next weekend, what do you think?” He offered. “Maybe we could recreate tonight in person, amongst other things.”You held back an ecstatic squeal from leaving you. Maybe university wasn’t going to be bad at all, you thought.

[highvern]

adamas et aurum

Pairing: Kim Mingyu x reader

Genre: fluff

Warnings: gross domestic fluff, boyfriend mingyu

Length: ~1.7k

Note: more Drunk Goggles couple bc im beating a dead horse. idk why i do this to myself :) crying :) in :) the :) club :)

read more here

“You owe me a kiss.”

“Oh, do I?”

Mingyu huffs, face covered in sweat, backwards hat matting his hair to his skull, bare chest rose-colored from the fiery sun and swampy humidity. You’ve both spent all morning moving boxes to and fro so he’s about two seconds away from laying down on the floor for a much needed nap. When it came to heavier stuff, Mingyu insisted you stay and start unpacking the necessities so the apartment would at least be somewhat functional around all the mess. He didn’t have the heart to tell you that his shredded patience couldn’t handle any more of your help. Thank god some of the guys are coming over tomorrow to help him with the furniture.

Because of his chivalry, you’ve stayed cool in the AC, humming to the music blasting from a speaker in the kitchen as you work to make the new space a home. All the while Mingyu slaves away to lug in stuff he doesn’t remember either of you owning. 

“Boyfriend tax.”

“Ahhhh,” you nod. 

Jumping up on your toes, you deliver a cartoonishly wet smack on his lips as a thank you for his hard word.

“How’s it going?”

“Bathroom is mostly unpacked but we need to get some bins to organize under the sink. Oh! And the beds made too!” You chirp, turning back to your task of wiping out the cabinets and drawers of your new kitchen. “If you wanna wash up and lay down, I’ll order something to eat.”

“You’re the best.” he sighs, stepping into the space behind you, chest against your back, face tucked into the curve of your shoulder, hands grasping the edge of the counter on each side of your hips. 

“My man works hard, gotta take care of him.” You praise, twisting your neck to drop a kiss to his temple causing you to get a whiff of his sweat.

“Now go shower, you stink.” 

“Hey!” Mingyu objects, face moving over your shoulder so he can look at you. “I’m sorry I’ve been roleplaying as your hot shirtless mover for the last two hours. Bust my butt and this is how you thank me?”

Turning to face him, you tangle your arms around his neck, linking your hands behind his head and pulling him into a bear hug. His palms slide around the sensitive skin of your back, pulling you closer as your shirt sticks to his sweaty chest uncomfortably where you press together. But that doesn’t matter right now. Right now, you’re together, in the new apartment you share, starting the next chapter of your lives.

“Thank you, Mingyu. I love you.” You whisper into his collarbone.

“Damn right.” He mumbles, tilting his head down to drop a sweet peck to your mouth, arms giving a tight squeeze before swatting at your ass as he turns towards the bedroom.

“Hey!”

“Boyfriend tax!” He calls over his shoulder, amusement bubbling in his voice.

Your eyes trail after him, heart swelling as it begins to fully register what you’ve done. He’s here and his name is on the lease next to yours; your matching keys hanging by the door, assigned parking spots downstairs next to each other. Mingyu just went into your shared bedroom, to take a shower in your shared bathroom, and tonight you’ll curl up beside him in your shared bed.

Wonwoo moving in with his girlfriend has been the catalyst for the much needed conversation. Mingyu had essentially been living out of your apartment for months already, only returning to his own place every few days for fresh clothes or to see his friend. When his roommate told him he was planning to move out after their lease ended in four months you simply scoffed at his distress about where to live. 

“You basically live with me anyway.” You mumbled, not thinking about what the statement implied.

“I—,” he gapes. “Are you asking me to move in with you?”

“I just mean, you already stay here so much anyway.” You grumble, suddenly feeling awkward in his hold.

“Can you just ask me nicely?” He whines. “I wanna be romanced.”

Humoring him, you slide to the floor in front of the couch you two had been draped across. Dropping to one knee, you cup your hands together in a makeshift box like you’re proposing. Your eyes round and brows raise, attempting and failing to give him an earnest expression.

“Kim Mingyu, love of my life, future father of my children, bane of my existence. Will you do me the honor of moving in with me?”

“Bain of your existence?”

“Focus.” You snap your fingers. “Will you move in with me?”

“Duh,” he beams, tackling you to the ground and snaring you in a bear hug as you squeal in delight.

Your friends had warned you about signing a lease together; that no matter how many nights Mingyu stays at your apartment (twenty three in a row is his record), when you call the same place home things will be different. And all of his bad habits won’t change just because he’s living with his girlfriend. If anything they may get worse because it's his home now too and he’s no longer a long staying guest.

You already knew that Mingyu tends to leave the seat up after using the bathroom, and will collapse with laughter if you fall in; that he insists on burying his cold feet under your butt when sitting on the couch, occasionally wiggling his toes just to piss you off; and how he will put the carton of milk back in the fridge even if there's only a drop left no matter how many threats against his person you make.

But Mingyu also sets his alarm ten minutes earlier than needed so he can hold you in bed before starting the day, basking in each others drowsy warmth before braving the world outside the sheets; he frequently insists you sit between his legs on the floor and let him dry your hair after you shower, gently combing his fingers through it, sometimes twisting the locks into messy braids or buns with his clumsy hands; how he’ll surprise you with a candle light dinner, insisting you both dress up even though your sitting at the kitchen table on a Tuesday eating reheated leftovers, just because he can.

No matter how annoying his bad habits are, the good ones are worth their weight and more in gold.

A shockingly girlish shriek shatters your daydream.

Hightailing it to the bathroom, you spot your stark naked boyfriend through the plastic of the shower liner, quivering in the corner of the stall like a leaf blowing in the wind. 

“What’s wrong?”

“Its fucking hot!” He cries, over his shoulder, trying to shield his body from the spray by curling into the tiled wall.

Heaving a sigh of relief and annoyance, you can’t help rolling your eyes as you step towards the front of the tub and twist the faucet, adjusting to a cooler temperature for him so he doesn’t have to stick his arm through the scalding rain.

“Big baby,” you grumble before heading back to the kitchen.

“I heard that!”

“You were supposed to!”

-

Mingyu shuffles into the bedroom, towel draped low on his waist, beads of water falling from his hair to his collarbone as he looks for the duffle bag he packed with clothes for the next few days; but the scene before him stops him in his tracks. The sun from the window casts the room in a buttery yellow, beams of light dappling your figure sprawled on the bed, mouth open slightly and hair a mess around your face. He leans a shoulder against the door frame, tired eyes full of love and mouth lifted in a gentle smile as his soulmate snores quietly a few feet away.

When you asked if he wanted to move in together, Mingyu lacked the self control needed to stop from jumping up and screeching like a kid in a candy store. The thought of living with his favorite person in the world had his heart tremble and his palms sweat. Despite all the oddities and quirks he learned about you in the past two years of dating, almost everyone warned him that you can’t really know someone till you live with them. He thinks the months before today had prepared him for the inevitable annoyances you two would face.

He’s accepted that you leave hair on the walls of the shower that eventually clog the drain, pooling water around his feet when he hops in the stall before work; how you push around takeout boxes and spoiled produce in the fridge for days instead of throwing them out; and that piles of unfolded laundry will sit on the edge of the couch for days on end until one day the planets align and you decide to re-organize your entire closet after folding the wrinkle garments.

Mingyu accepts all of those things because he also knows you like to surprise him by grabbing all the ingredients for a recipe he mentions wanting to try in passing, happily volunteering to be his sous chef and taste tester, insisting you both don the couple aprons his mom got you for Christmas; that when he isn’t feeling well you’ll scratch his back until he falls asleep with his cheek squished on your stomach while you fret over him; how you always wait up for him when he gets ready for bed, glazed eyes opening every few minutes to blink lazily, soft breath tickling the skin between his shoulder blades where your head lays only interrupted by an occasional sleepy kiss on his spine while he brushes his teeth.

His friends mentioned all the ways moving in together will change the way you see each other. But in the two years you’ve been dating, each time your relationship changed it's been for the better. When you two started hanging out on your own and he found his opinion on you shifting completely. When you admitted you liked each other and he learned you were a lot braver than he was. When you two fought for the first time and he realized that as brave as you were, you weren’t invincible. When he said he loved you for the first time by accident and discovered you were just as in this as he was. All the fights that challenged you to understand each other better, the struggles that strained your ability to take care of one another; all of it had changed your relationship but pressure makes a diamond.

A lot like the one he plans to give you when he asks if you want to change your relationship again one day.

[madaqueue]

Practice Makes Perfect | Chapter 10

synopsis: you and yuji have been best friends basically as long as you can remember, and you made a promise to each other to stay friends and help each other be the best versions of yourselves for your future partners. but will things change when yuji finally starts looking for a relationship?

pairing: yuji itadori (18+) x f!reader

themes/content: modern college au (characters aged up to 18+). language. 18+, MDNI

word count: 1.7k

a/n: clarity by zedd playing softly in the background

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After your fight with Yuji, things get bad. The next month is a blur. Your mind is clouded, unable to focus on your classes, or anything else for that matter. You feel like you’re watching yourself going through the motions everyday - wake up, go to class, come home, eat, sleep, repeat. As you stare at yourself in the mirror while you brush your teeth, it’s like you’re not even there.

Yuji hasn’t tried texting you, so you don’t even bother going on your phone anymore. You didn’t realize how dark your life becomes without the light of his presence in it. It feels like you’ve lost your ability to feel anything, too burnt out from the anger, confusion, and guilt you’ve been fighting the past few weeks.

Megumi can tell something is off when you sit silently next to him in class, your normal smile now gone without a trace. He wants to ask, but he has a feeling he already knows what’s bothering you, and pressing you on it won’t help. After every lecture you get up with a sigh, muttering a soft, “See you later,” to him, the only words he hears you say anymore.

You become listless. You no longer know how to fill your time, so you start wandering around campus. A part of you hopes that the fresh air will clear the dirt you feel clouding your soul, but it doesn’t seem to help.

During one of these walks, your eyes unfocused as you look down to trace the outline of the bricks lining the path beneath your feet, you suddenly get the wind knocked out of you as you collide directly into someone.

“Sorry,” you mutter without looking up, trying to regain your footing.

“Shit, it’s okay,” you hear the voice of the person you ran into respond. “Oh wait, I know you!”

You sluggishly pull your eyes from your ground to the person standing in front of you. Your eyes meet their face and you recognize the familiar shoulder-length brown hair - Nobara. She stands in front of you in a plain sweatshirt and leggings, almost perfectly mirroring your outfit. You can’t say anything, and you’re not even sure what you would say, so you just stare at her.

Sensing the silence, she takes initiative to continue the conversation. “You’re Yuji’s friend, right?”

His name sends a pang of guilt through your body and your eyes shift down, not sure how to respond anymore. Are you friends? Does he hate you? Does he even want to talk to you anymore? The questions course through your mind, but you’re pulled back by the realization that you should probably respond to her question. You muster an empty nod, your face blank, eyes still on the ground.

“Yeah, I recognize you! He talks about you all the time,” she laughs. “Sorry, I realize it’s kind of weird that I just started talking to you because we’ve never actually met, I just knew your face from all the pictures Yuji has shown me of you guys together. I’m Nobara Kugisaki,” she says, holding her hand out to shake it.

You slowly raise your hand to hers, shaking it loosely, still not making eye contact. As you do, her words replay in your mind. He…talks about you? He shows her pictures of you two together?

She raises one eyebrow at your visibly dejected demeanor, and decides to take matters into her own hands. “Hey, I’m about to go grab a coffee, do you want to come? I’ve honestly been dying to meet you,” she follows.

Scanning her voice, you don’t find any hint of jealousy in it. She actually sounds shockingly genuine. For the first time your eyes move up to meet hers. “Okay,” you say meekly.

“Great!” she cheers, wrapping her arm through yours as she practically drags you down the street.

She brings you to a cafe right off campus that you and Megumi had been to before, one that he personally described as “just alright.” You pick a table as Nobara brings over your coffees, setting a latte down in front of you as she takes a sip of her iced coffee.

“So,” she starts, “what’s going on with you and Yuji?”

Of course. You knew this question was an inevitability. What had he told her about you? Does she know about his feelings for her? Is she asking because she’s jealous, or because she’s confident in her relationship with him? Do they even have a relationship?

“Um, we’re just friends,” you mutter, eyes glued to the table.

“Mm, nope, sorry but I don’t buy it,” she smirks, stirring her coffee in the air.

Shit. Clearly he’s told her about you, and now she’s here because she feels threatened. She must know about his feelings for her, and whatever Megumi thought about her was wrong.

“I-” you start.

“No, see, there’s no way Yuji thinks you’re just friends,” she cuts you off. “He’s, like, in love with you or something. He literally will not shut up about you, to the point that it’s almost annoying.”

Hearing her words your eyes flit up to meet hers, shock evident on your face.

“Wait, did you not know that?” she takes in your surprise. “Oh my god, that little shit!” she exclaims, throwing her head back to laugh. “I’ve been asking him to meet you for forever because I feel like I already know you after everything he’s told me about you. I figured we’d be great friends, but he always made some weird excuse about it. I just thought he was trying to hide you from me, but now I get it - he never told you he had feelings for you!” she thinks aloud, still chuckling.

You just stare blankly at her, mouth agape as you take in the information she’s presenting to you.

“Wait, did something happen between you guys?” she suddenly asks, turning her attention back to your face.

Hesitating for a moment, you sigh, figuring there’s no harm in just being honest with her - clearly she and Yuji are close, so it’ll come out eventually. “Um, yeah…” you trail off. “We got in a fight.”

“I knew it!” she almost yells. “I knew something was up with him. The past few weeks he’s been extra weird, like more weird than normal Yuji. I kept asking him about you and he wouldn’t answer, and it was almost like he flinched whenever your name came up.” She pauses, taking a big swig of her coffee. “What did you guys fight about, anyways?”

Swallowing, you try to mentally weigh your options, deciding to just get it over with. “Well, we were at that party,” you sigh, Nobara nodding intently across from you. “And I…um…I saw him with you. And I just got jealous, and I saw you guys leave together, and-”

“Wow there,” she cuts you off again. “When did you see us ‘leave together?’ Because, no offense here, I would rather rip off my own legs than ‘leave’ with Yuji,” she laughs.

“He had his arm above you, and I turned around and when I looked back, you both were gone,” you explain hesitantly.

Recognition suddenly flashes across her face. “Oh my god, yes I remember that! I was making fun of Yuji because I could see you across the room and I wanted him to go over and talk to you, but he said something about you looking ‘too pretty to bother,’ so I shoved him to try and get him to go say hi. But when I did, he knocked into someone, they got pissed, and they threw their drink over me! Can you believe that? It wasn’t even my fault,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “I had to go upstairs to get a change of clothes since Maki was hosting and I knew she’d be cool about it, but Yuji just sat outside the door to make sure no one came in while I was getting dressed.”

“W-what? No, that…that can’t be right” you stutter. Your thoughts cloud again. You try to replay your memories of that night: Yuji next to Nobara, her shoving him, both of them disappearing…the timing would make sense.

“I don’t know what else to tell you,” she shrugs, “but you really have no reason to worry about me. I don’t really, how do I say this, go for the Yuji’s of the world, if you catch my drift,” she says with a smirk, taking another sip of her coffee.

“But…the two of you had a date?”

“Date?” she laughs. “He and I hang out for our group project sometimes, which he is totally not pulling his weight in, by the way, but we are definitely not going on dates.”

“But Yuji said…” you trail off.

“Yuji’s an idiot, respectfully. He starts talking before his brain can catch up sometimes. I wouldn’t put too much stock into what he says,” she continues. “All I know is that he’s been acting like an injured puppy for a while, and now I know why. Whatever he said or did, you don’t have to forgive him, but believe me when I say that he and I are nothing more than friends and you have nothing to worry about on that front.” She reaches her hand out across the table. “So, what do you say? Do you think you and I can still be friends?”

You nod, a smile starting to form on your face for the first time in a while as you reach out to shake her hand.

The two of you finish your coffee and you learn that she’s actually so much cooler than you ever could have expected. She’s a business major so she can learn how to run a national all-women tattoo shop, she was a semi-professional kickboxer, and she works as a carpenter on the side for a bit of extra cash. You silently thank the fates that she’s not interested in guys, otherwise you would never be able to compete with her. A few times throughout the conversation with her you find yourself laughing so hard your stomach hurts, a feeling you had all but forgotten.

As the two of you get up to part ways, you thank her for taking the time to talk with you. She punches you gently in the shoulder and tells you to call her any time.

On the walk home, you notice the sky starting to cloud as the wind picks up. The moment you step back into your dorm rain begins to pour against your window, as if the sky is cleansing the earth the same way you cleansed your conscience. The conversation with Nobara leaves you feeling rested and clear. Now, all that’s left is to apologize to Yuji.

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[httpknjoon]

(re)starting over again | kth; 10

plot | Your four-year relationship with Taehyung was going well and strong. Until he was involved in a car accident, resulting to him losing some memories. By some, it means everything that happened five years ago. Things he remember? His friends, his bakeshop, and his ex girlfriend from the past. With that, you tried to keep up, restarting over again.

words | 4.3k+

genres | fluff, angst, amnesia au

pairing | taehyung x reader

warning/s | -

note | oh my god. hi, everyone! i'm still alive haha i apologize for the *long* delay. may wasn't my month 🙃 but now, i'm here and I split this chapter, so expect a 10.5. this is A LOT OF ANGST. no fluff for now. just full-on gloomy. also, i'll be replying to everyone who sent their asks soon! tysm for sending 'em. again, i apologize for the delay! enjoy reading :)

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Someone’s a little gloomy today.

The sound of echoing thunder woke you up today, along with the rings of your alarm in your phone. 5:15 AM. You groaned as the brightness from your phone’s screen hit your vision. After five more minutes of just staring at the most uninteresting wall in your room, you get up from your bed to prepare for work.

Unsurprisingly, your head feels heavy and so is your chest and eyes. Every step of your bare foot on the ground strangely felt like you were floating into space. The weather is cozy and cold, but you didn’t even flinch when the cold water hits your skin. You stood under the shower, the heater not even on, just staring at your feet.

I mean, he could have told me.

The sentence popped into your head. There is this part of you that is in between the scale of angry and sad after knowing about Lily visiting the bakeshop and talking to Taehyung. You wondered if Taehyung even had planned on telling you or if he don’t think he should have told you. You are starting to think he was only friendlier with you these past few days because he learned what happened between him and Lily.  You’re beginning to think that he is only nicer to you now after bad their relationship went.

But did he even owe me that? I’m basically a stranger to him.

Another idea, opposite the other one, crossed your mind. You always try to be understanding and put yourself in his shoes in this confusing situation. The fact that your boyfriend doesn’t really have any idea who you are always staying in the back of your head. It’s always there as a reminder that Taehyung doesn’t know you. And his not telling you that he met up with his ex-girlfriend days ago confirmed that you are probably someone in the background for him. Someone… who suddenly lives in this house with him.

And thanks to that confirmation, more questions were formed by your brain.

You shut your eyes close and turned your head up, feeling the waterdrops on your face. Sighing, “Who even am I here?”

Taehyung, what am I even to you here?

The question floats in Taehyung’s head over and over again. The pain and confusion in your voice also play on a loop, adding weight to his shoulders and thorns in his throat. He wished he could answer that question easily, but he can’t. Seeing someone who treated him with care and kindness break down in front of him because of him is a slap on his face.

Because Lily is your girlfriend… right?

More guilt built up in him when he learned that you were aware that he still initially saw Lily as his girlfriend after he woke from the accident. It surprised him to hear you say that you cannot be mad with that. When you said that, he almost instantly wanted you to be angry at him, to let out every emotion you were feeling at the time.

Because you are too considerate and kind… and patient with him and this situation you’ve been put into. You didn’t even have to stay; you could’ve just left him the moment the doctor told you about his amnesia and all. But you stayed… and even looked after him for a whole month. Looking back at everything now, he knew. He should have just told you.

He thought you would be mad at him for reaching out to an ex. He didn’t know how you would react if he asked about Lily. He didn’t know you and he admit that was his fault. He has been working on knowing you these past few days, but now after last night, it felt too late. He should have made an effort earlier than this. As much as he hates it, Taehyung’s list of should haves is getting longer.

Now, a tray of chocolate chip cookies bakes in this oven you two have in your kitchen. He decided to make some after having trouble sleeping. He was shifting and turning on his bed for hours, possibly because of two causes: his head injury and you. Earlier, you were talking about how much you’ve been craving cookies. He knows that his cookies cannot resolve what’s going on right now, but he hoped that they will make you feel better. Even a little.

Taehyung managed to sleep for a couple of hours but still woke up later two hours past midnight. He quietly prepares and bakes the ingredients for the cookies. He was quick as it was the easiest pastry he can make. By the time he was putting the tray in the oven, he heard grumbles of thunder.

Should I put it in the jar? Or…

Almost thirty minutes past three, Taehyung yawned as he waited for the cookies to cool down before he stores them. He looked around your kitchen. In these quiet moments, he is finally starting to notice some details in some corners of this place. Particularly, the kitchen.  He wondered if he picked the color of the walls or what to put in it when you two bought the house. His curiosity begins to grow about what you built together throughout your four-year relationship.

He wondered how great everything was before he lost his memories of the last five years.

You were supposed to leave at six o clock. But you didn’t realize how much you took your time with your thoughts that you ended up leaving twenty minutes late than your plan. Rushing to leave, you didn’t bother for breakfast and ran straight to the front door in your scrubs and jacket with backpack and umbrella in hand. If you still have time to spare when you arrive at the hospital, you’ll just buy something in its cafeteria.

As you get off the bus, you speed-walk to the hospital. You were too in a hurry to recognize who greeted you along the way, but you just greeted them back anyway. By the time you reached the locker room, you were catching your breath with less than ten minutes left to prepare for your shift.

Thank God, Jisoo’s not here. You sighed when you looked at yourself in front of the small mirror in your locker. Your eyes… were puffy. It’s not that bad. But everyone who will look directly at your eyes would tell the difference. You hoped no one else would notice.

“Good morning!”

Your eyebrows raised. Julia’s jolly greeting filled the quiet room when she entered. A couple of nurses who were also there greeted her back while you hid behind your locker door, trying to think of a quick remedy or even an explanation for your eyes. Because next to Jisoo, Julia is your closest friend here. She started working here two years ago. Her kind and sociable nature made her a friend to everyone. You three immediately went friends during a mutual graveyard shift schedule.

“Hey, YN. Good morning.” she opened her locker, which was next to yours.

You gulped, “Good morning, Ju.”

After one last look in the mirror, you closed the door. Julia was busy organizing her things in the locker, while she continues speaking.

“Jisoo’s already on break for her wedding, right?” she asked, still not giving you a glance.

“Ah, yes. For only one week though.” You replied, trying to act normal. You don’t know if you should go or wait for her to time in since you two usually do—with Jisoo if your shift schedule match up.

“You know, my dress for the weekend is still in the— Oh, what happened?”

In a quick glance, she immediately spotted a certain emotion on your face. Concern was written all over her face as she stopped and faced you.

“W-What?” you chuckled awkwardly, looking away.

“Why did you cry? What’s going on?” she asked softly, still worried. “Are you okay?”

Oh, that question. You don’t know what the hell that question has, it always breaks you down. You bit your lower lip as you looked back at Julia. You tried to hold on to the strings that were putting you together.

You sighed shakingly, “Yeah.”

A small, sad smile formed on her lips, “You sure?”

You feel like if you try to say anything again, it will just turn into a sob. So, you just nod. Unexpectedly, she reached out her arms and hugged you. Julia knew something was wrong. Well, she can definitely read through your eyes and the simple quirk of your lips that you probably don’t know you do whenever you’re bothered or tired. She can even feel the weight you’ve been carrying in an embrace.

“How about let’s go out together later? After this shift?” she offered.

 

“Sure.” You agreed, washing down any effort to put a useless mask on your emotions.

The cookies that he left on the kitchen counter for you were left untouched. He left it in a Tupperware, something that can fit in your backpack, along with a small post-it, written: cookies u can bring @ your shift today :)

He likes to think that the Tupperware probably went unnoticed by you instead of thinking that you ignored it. But what if you did? The idea of you being mad at him scares him.

“I swear, whoever will eat those cupcakes would choke on rainbow sprinkles.” Jimin entered the kitchen when Taehyung was just spacing out. He hung his coat behind the door and put on his apron. “What’s up?”

“Hmm?”

Jimin went on, “I arrived twenty minutes late and you already made two batches of blueberry cupcakes, one tray of snickerdoodles, and a lot of banana bread. What’s going on?”

Taehyung stared at him for a second, having battles in his head if he should tell his best friend about what happened. Jimin didn’t fail to remind him about telling you about Lily. And if he learns how you reacted last night—Oh, just sucked it up. Taehyung exhaled.

“YN learned about Lily.”

Jimin raised an eyebrow, “You told her?”

“She found through Lily herself,” Taehyung replied and he can read the confusion on his friend’s face.

“Huh?”

Taehyung went on telling how you and Lily introduced yourselves, how you introduced yourself as his friend, how Lily shared that she visited the bakeshop just last week, and how you remained quiet and bottled up with emotions until you two went home.

“She was so upset, she didn’t want to talk about it,” Taehyung recalled. “But she just broke down and she is still so nice in the middle of telling me how she feels. She told me that she cannot be mad at me for meeting up with Lily or for everything else. Because she understands. She always understands and I’m sure she is a wonderful person– but… But I really didn’t just give us a chance. She reminded me that we also happened after asking me who is she in this whole thing.”

He paused, remembering almost every word you said to him last night. He was too busy chasing what happened five years ago that he ignored someone and something important in his present time. 

“Then, who is she to you?” his best friend asked.

“I… I don’t know.” Taehyung sighed, unsure. “But she’s not a stranger. Calling her a stranger would be an insult. I know she’s much more than that.”

There was a few seconds of silence. Taehyung looked down, resting his hands on his working table. Jimin just pats his shoulder for comfort. He knew saying things like I told you so or anything close to that is just useless. Taehyung already knew what he had done, he don’t need more reminders that he probably fucked up. 

“Well, you need to figure that out.” 

“I know.”

“I don’t know anymore, Ju.”

You wiped off the tears on your cheek as you confessed. Finally, after a whole day shift at the hospital, you get to open up to someone. As soon as you two left the hospital and changed into your casual clothes, Julia drove you two to her apartment since you don’t really feel like going anywhere. She ordered pizza and non-alcoholic drinks, which were delivered just minutes after you two arrived there.

No time was wasted. She didn’t even have to ask again for you to open up. For the last forty minutes, you’ve been telling whatever you feel like sharing to your friend. It did take off some weight on your chest as she listened and nods.

“I mean, I know that he’s just trying to know what happened between him and his ex. But I cannot understand why he didn’t tell me… Or maybe ask me about it. I know something about it. He told me how they broke up years ago. He told me what went wrong. Just like how I shared experiences with my past relationships too. And that’s how it used to be.” You reached for another tissue Julia offered. “We used to tell each other everything. Communication and honesty always mattered to him.”

“And it would have been nice if he let me know about his plans on talking with Lily. It’s perfectly fine by me. But he didn’t and now I’m starting to feel that he sees me as nothing. Just a person around him, who lives in the same house as him—or worse, he sees me as someone who just looks after him… like his nurse.”

The last thought squeezed your heart out. Taehyung even had a hard time introducing you yesterday to Lily. You took the initiative to introduce yourself to his ex as his friend. You don’t know what to feel about it. Should you be mad or sad? But can you blame him? You can never blame Taehyung. You always try to understand what he went through with that accident and what he is going through now. But as much as you hate to admit it…

“I feel like I’m burning out. I’m fucking drained.”

Another tear rolled down your cheeks while you shake your head. Saying that sentence felt like a confession of a crime. You don’t know why. You didn’t follow with another sentence again. Julia gave you a glass of water to help you calm down.

“You can take a break too, you know?” she whispered as you gulped in the liquid down your throat. “You can pause…”

Julia was gentle with her tone and choice of words.

“I think, you've already done enough. You took a month's leave to take care of Taehyung, to at least help him adjust to these big changes happen. You waited for him to ask about you or your relationship, which he did– Well, he tried. You are great. You were nothing caring and understanding for him and your relationship.” She paused and held your hand, preparing you for what she is about to say. “But he… he just has his eyes on people he knew before you.”

You almost hissed with the harsh sentiment of your friend. It felt like someone pulled the band-aid off your fresh, unhealed wound. But still, it felt like you needed to hear that. Julia, on the other hand, saw you flinch and held your palm tighter. 

She continued, “The Taehyung you met before the accident is different from the Taehyung you live together now. As you said, five years ago, he went through a breakup with his ex. That breakup may have caused changes in him that made him into the Taehyung you initially met.”

It’s complicated. But you get what she is trying to say. A lot of things happened in Taehyung’s life before you two crossed paths. He broke up with Lily, and his bakery began to hit success and invest in other stuff in his life. A lot of other changes happened. Then, you two met through mutual friends.

“And please, YN, let yourself feel things.” Julia spoke suddenly, making you meet her gaze, “It’s unhealthy. Be sad, be mad, or be happy. Or simply take a break if you feel like it. Don’t deny yourself of feeling anything. You can be mad.” She said it like a reminder. “You have every right to feel so. I know you’re trying to justify Taehyung reaching out to an ex behind your back as part of this knotty situation. But at least, out of respect to you, he should have at least told you before or after he did so.”

“That’s why you’re so burnout right now, hon. You’ve done nothing but give and give. You forgot about your limits too… Are you even still okay working in the same hospital after everything?”

She asked and almost instantly, you remembered the night of the accident. You were waiting for your boyfriend to pick you up in the same spot you always waited in. Then, you received this call. Next thing you know, you’re seeing him getting pulled out of the ambulance. Bloody and bruised. Your stomach twisted with the recollection of his state that night. Thankfully, Julia called your name, snapping you out of your trance.

“Just know that you’re not alone in any of this. You don’t have to carry everything on your own. Jisoo and I are always here for you.  And I really appreciate you opening up to me now.” She smiled softly before pulling you in for another hug.

After that hug, you two moved on to lighter topics. You asked her about her preparation for Jisoo and Namjoon’s special day at the end of the week. She talked about Chanyeol, her plus-one for the wedding. She shared about how things are going and you’re genuinely happy to see her happy. You ended up leaving at seven. Julia offered to drive you home, but you kindly refused, saying you need to be alone for a short while.

“Okay, just let me know when you got home.” She smiled and of course, was enveloped in the warmest hug you’ve ever received recently.

Just like when you left home earlier, the sky was dark and gloomy as you wait at the bus stop. Raindrops began falling just minutes after you got on the bus. You sat on the farthest empty seat your eyes spotted. Watching the raindrop rolling on the glass window, you thought about Julia and everything she said.

Change.

You wondered if change can help your emotional burnout while leaning your head on the cold surface of the vehicle. Truthfully, working in the same hospital after the accident is difficult. The first day you returned after your month-long leave you found yourself stopping in your tracks at every spot your feet took you that night of the accident. You also don’t enjoy the pity glances or smiles you get from your colleagues who knew about the accident. There were times, someone would approach you and say something nice or motivational. You appreciate the effort but it’s making your work more of a reminder than a distraction for what happened.

You get off the bus with a new idea and even more uncertainties in mind. You still felt like a deflating balloon floating your way to get home. After your breakdown, you wonder how Taehyung would react. He seemed pretty quiet last night. The Taehyung you know would prefer talking with you to at least mend these issues. But now, you’re really just tired and would rather organize your thoughts alone.

And when you walked up your front porch, you stopped as you saw the lights on in the kitchen. He’s home early. You turned the knob, preparing yourself with any awkward tension that is always suffocating. Walking in, a delicious smell of flavor filled your nostrils. You’re not planning to say anything but then, he greeted you.

“Oh, hey…”

It was short but soft. His lips formed a small, tight smile. He was indeed cooking as he holds a wooden spatula and you can hear the crinkling sound in the pan. You noticed he is wearing a familiar apron and a headband, exposing his forehead, to avoid his jet-black hair in sticking on the sweaty corners of his forehead.

“Hey.” you greeted back, forcing a polite smile on your lips. “You’re home?”

Taehyung noted the lack of any emotion in your voice or even eyes. You just looked exhausted. But he replied, “Yeah, we kinda closed early.  Sold out.”

He smiled again, hoping that maybe you would smile back at him. You didn’t. Instead, you zipped your lips. And there it is. The awkward silence took over--not only the kitchen—but the whole house. He looked at you and you looked at him. It didn’t even last a couple of seconds. You looked away again, scratching your eyebrow.  

“I should probably go—”

“I’m making dinner. Maybe—"

You two broke off the silence at the same time. You waited for him to continue but his nod asked you to resume.

“Yeah, uhm, I should go to my room.” You mumbled, not meeting his eyes. You just can’t.

It’s Taehyung’s turn to scratch the back of his neck, “Uhm, I made dinner. I was wondering if we can eat together.”

You timidly shake your head, “I’m kinda full… I had pizza with Julia. But thank you for the offer though.”

You were about to leave, wanting to leave this room since you were having the hardest time breathing with the thick tension. But Taehyung called your name,

“I was hoping we can talk… about everything.”

You turned around, finally looking at him. Suddenly, his heartbeat was louder than anything else for him. He can already see the rejection on your face. Like you’re not in the mood for anything that had to do with him. But he wishes his deduction is wrong. On the flip side, you can see his fingers fiddling with the spatula as he said that.

You exhaled, “I can’t, Taehyung. I really had a long day. I’m sorry—”

“No, it’s okay. Don’t apologize. We can talk whenever you’re ready.” He awkwardly raised his hands for thumbs-up. He saw your worried eyes landing on the dish he cooked. “Don’t worry about it. I’ll store it when it cools down. You can microwave it later if you get hungry.”

A simple, worn-out nod was your only reply before leaving him alone. His smile slowly fades as he turned down his chin.

He waited. Patiently. The morning after that, he waited for you to leave for work before he does. He goes home before you do. He prepared breakfasts and dinners for you, but you always seemed to be running late going to work and exhausted when you get home. And the rainy season didn’t stop. Taehyung once offered to walk you at least to the bus stop when you had a graveyard shift. He’s glad you didn’t decline and walked side by side with him under the umbrella.

“You know, you don’t have to do any of this.” You murmured in the middle of that five-minute walk to the bus stop. You were just looking ahead as you resumed, “You’re not obligated to do anything with me.”

“I wanted to do this.” He replied, glancing at you, hoping that he will meet your eyes. But he didn’t.

You didn’t say anything anymore. Even when you got on the bus and he handed you the extra umbrella he brought. But he really did. Even though you two haven’t really done a lot of activities together, he liked doing things with you or for you.

Now it’s been days since you broke down, you two still haven’t talked about it. Jimin told him to be patient and give you time. But the more time he gives you, the more he felt like you were already slowly drifting away from him.

“Are you sure? We still have space for another passenger.”

Taehyung heard you from the living room as he pulled his small luggage out of his room. He wore a white collared button-down, with the sleeves folded before it reached his elbows, tucked in beige suit pants.

“Okay, Ju. See you there. Take care.”

Your smile fades as you ended the call. With every emotion washed out on your face, you glanced up at him. Your eyes simply scanned him from head to toe before you spoke, “Let’s go?”

Jisoo and Namjoon will be having their rehearsal and the following dinner in the same area as their wedding. It’s in the same event place as their wedding venue. The couple already prepared rooms for a few guests, so that you can stay overnight for the wedding tomorrow. You, Taehyung, and Jimin will be carpooling in a rented car, with Jimin taking the wheel for an almost two-hour drive straight to the dinner event.

“Be careful, it’s fragile.”

You teased Jimin as he helped you carry the wedding gift for your soon-to-be-wedded friends. Taehyung carried yours and his luggage to the car.

“I am careful.” Jimin scoffed.

“Oh, I apologize. I’m just worried. You do have small hands.” You jested that made Taehyung choke and laugh.

“Ha. Ha. Ha.” His best friend laughed dryly, squinting his eyes at you. “You two are bullies! It’s not that small.”

You chuckled once again before stopping when Taehyung opened the backseat door for you.

“Thanks.” You mumbled.

Taehyung sat on the passenger seat while Jimin took the wheel. In the first quarter of the ride, you still managed to join chit-chat. Jimin was the one who sparked up topics, which you were grateful for as you don’t know what would happen if it’s just you and Taehyung in this car. But as time went on, you yawned and slowly lost yourself to take a nap.

a/n: i'm thinking of updating/resetting the taglist for this series. kindly comment below if you still want to be tagged. thank you so much for your support <3

taglist rules

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[thestarfishinjootsoffice]

Hi i was wondering how would slashers celebrate their s/o's birthday?

Omfg I was literally thinking about this a few weeks ago. I don't know if poly or separate so I'll just put separate + with making cake!

I'm sorry this took so long, it was basically like this

My day be so fine writing this, then boom. My mom wakes up and makes me do chores.

And I also lacking motivation. Let me know if I should add more slashers.

Slashers celebrating their s/o's birthday!

Michael

You woke up to Michael standing over you, trying to catch your attention.

"What's wrong Michael..?"

He then drags you out of bed, it was unusual. You thought he might've accidentally knocked over some things but he dragged you to a calender and pointed at the date. It was marked... Your birthday! It wasn't marked before so that could only mean one thing.

"Aw, you remembered!" You hugged Michael's arm as he just stood there, you would've been a bit moody being woken up out of your sleep but you were happy your stoic mute expressionless boyfriend remembered your birthday. You walked over to the bathroom to get prepared. When you walked out you saw Michael with a note almost was unreadable that said "cake?"

"Oh, of course. There's no good birthday without cake."

Now you were both in the kitchen, Michael was just going to sit back and observe you but you insisted he'd join too. Now there was flour everywhere and egg bits on the counter and the sprinkles and chocolate chips no where to be seen, It suddenly disappeared when you told Michael about it. Hmm... You made a major mistake in telling Michael to put the cake batter in the oven while you were making icing and then a few minutes later your oven and cake was on fire and you ended up eating the icing and buying a small cake in a convenience store. Still a fun experience though. It was filled with laughter and giggling the whole time, he even smile secretly under his mask.

"Michael be more gentle, the eggs are flying everywhere! "

"Okay just pour the flou- not so fast!"

"Michael don't lick that you're gonna get salmonella."

"Michael? Where did the sprinkles go?"

"Ok,I'm done with the ic- what? OMG THE CAKE"

"Oh this is really good, here have a bite."

Billy and Stu

You were awoken with crashing down stairs and a loud scream. Curious and worried you discreetly started to waddle your way down stairs. You probably shouldn't but your boyfriends were in your house what if they got hurt?

You called out "Billy? Stu?" You were getting really worried. And then you saw your boyfriend Stu on the ground with blood on him and a knife on the ground. You started to tear up.

"Stu..?"

And then a a ghostly figure jumped in front of you stabbed you in the stomach, you looked down and you were frozen, the knife retraced and you saw that it was a fake knife! Then you heard laughter. You saw Stu get up and the figure took off it's mask and you saw Billy.

"Oh my god.." You sighed. They do this every couple of months and you fall for it everytime, you swear they have an obsession with 'ghostface'.

Stu then ran to hug you.

"I'm sorry baby." He said still laughing and smiling though. Billy joined in too and said,

"Okay as an apology we'll bake a cake for you."

"Why?"

"Because it's your birthday duh."

"Oh. Right." You were so scared you forgot it was your birthday.

You cleaned up the mess on the floor as they got the ingredients ready, it was alot. They really prepared for this.

"Okay so what are we gonna decorate it as? I want something spooky."

"Uh... A pumpkin? Witch? A zombie...??"

"Nah too cliché."

"How about ghostface with red filling inside as blood?"

"Oh you are a genius Y/n!" You smile shyly. You liked it though, even though it was really fucked up.

You quickly put to work and Stu kept throwing flour at the two of you as a silly little joke and Billy would do it ten times harder. You'd have to eventually duck down every once in a while since they were really getting into it but it was still somehow working out. You got everything done you put it in the oven and you decided to join in the fun and then Stu fell down and accidentally turned the temperature really high so it was a little burnt but that's the good part. They were REALLY quiet and focused on the decorating part it almost looked uncharacteristic. The cake turned out awesome but not so awesome at the incredibly dusty chaotic filth on the floor.

"You're gonna mess up the cake!"

"Stop eating the icing it's for the cake."

"Apologize to the cake"

"Let's put some candies in it!"

"Wow you're really good at this"

"Wait how are we going to get the filling inside"

"Damn this shit hits."

Jason

You were chilling outside when you saw Jason come over to you with a shit ton of flowers in his arms and slowly drops it all over you. Making it rain flowers for a few seconds.

"What's the occasion?" You asked him smiling holding some of the flowers.

He signs "your birthday" Right, it's your birthday today!

You smiled at him "what should we do on my birthday?"

He shrugged. There wasn't really much around the woods you guys could do well. Except go outside out of the woods! But he was a little shy. him somehow once ending up in New York City in Manhattan doesn't count.

So you decided to get some groceries instead. After a few hours of being paranoid you come back. With baking ingredients! He was excited. He couldn't really bake anymore after he died so he was ecstatic and especially with you too? He was a really happy man.

He was really careful and gentle with his actions, making sure not to mess up and upset you. You could basically order him anything and he would do it. But as the good spouse you are you decided to help him. He carefully poured the flour and cracked the eggs. unlike Michael and listened to every word you instructed to him discreetly. The baking session ended with a small food fight and two hungry spouses. It was a beautiful forest decorated cake with a couple fruits in it which was soft and sweet just perfect for a birthday. You don't know if zombies can have normal human food but he got a couple slices anyway.

It was a very fun experience for the both of you and you'd bake again and not just for a birthday.

"It's okay, there's nothing to panic about."

"You're doing great!"

"Yeah pass me th- did you just throw that at me."

"Cut the fruits into half's."

"Oh you did wonderful!"

"Can you even taste that?"

Thomas

Oh I'm not sure how he'll be able to celebrate your birthday when he's busy working 24/7 but I'm sure he can fix something.

You were babysitting babi while the others were busy with the victims. Even though it was your birthday you didn't mind hanging out with Babi, it kept you entertained anyways. You got thirsty and went into the kitchen and you saw your boyfriend and greeted him when he stopped you all of a sudden.

"What's worry Tommy?" But he just shook his head.

"Let me in I'm thirsty, I don't mind if there's a dead body on the ground." He then yet again shook his head and pushed you into the room you and Babi were previously in and ran out and came back with your water. That was weird.. But you choose to ignore it. Nothing was normal here anyway.

Babi started to get tired and fell asleep and you tucked her in but you were started to get really bored so you went outside into the woods for some fresh air. While walking you suddenly tripped and scratched yourself and started to bleed. Great. And you then heard running and the faint sound of a chainsaw from behind you and you saw a bleeding dirtied girl look at you and then grabbed you and started running. What the hell? She whispered.

"It's okay, I know you're scared but were gonna get out of this place together." Her voice was shaky and weak. Did she think you were a victim? Well in the state you were you did look like one. You tried to break out of her grip but they were like iron. You were about to say something but you shouldn't let her go. it'd be a great danger for you and the hewitts. So you decided to play along. But what you didn't expect was that she threw you in front of Thomas when he got near the both of you.

It was so sudden he managed to injure you. He immediately dropped his weapon and rushed over to you. There was a cut on your shoulder and blade but it was just a small minor injury. But the girl was getting away.

"Tommy I'm fine, get her!" You hissed slightly.

He was reluctant but he had to and not even 3 minutes later he comes back and carries you to the house. You were patched up and you saw Thomas walked to you holding a cake! But it wasn't without any icing or cream on it. And then he pointed at the table where there were cut up fruits and the icing. So you get to decorate whatever you'd like to. And God forbid hoyt says anything about this. He'll get a direct smack to the head by Luda. And hooray, everyone gets cake!

"Tommy put the blueberries over there."

"What should we make?"

"Is that supposed to be me?"

"Babi don't eat too much too much of the cream!"

"Oh thank you Mom, you were so generous to bake a cake for me."

"This is the best birthday I've ever had!"

[aita-blorbos]

AITA for reminding a friend to keep the promise he made to me?

Everyone I've asked so far has had really weird knee-jerk reactions but I think it's probably just because they don't know me super well. I'm pretty sure I'm being reasonable but hey, best to double-check, right? (And sorry if this is long, but boy do I have a LOT of ground to cover!)

Anyway... I (??M) am a ghost, and a bunch of people recently moved into the place I'd been (un)living in, and then about half a year later all of them were suddenly able to see me. They're all really chaotic people, so a lot happened between them pretty quickly and I wasn't able to fully catch everything that went down before I became visible to them. This is to say -- I don't know why my friend (??M) decided he wanted to have the grand prize for his claw machine game be a no-strings-attached favor from him, I just know he did that.

I eventually got the grand prize (technically someone else won it first and it was a whole thing, but we're even now) and met up with my friend to talk about it. Basically, I told him I wasn't going to call in that favor unless there was something I really needed him to do, and otherwise we'd be fine to keep being friends as usual. He seemed a little unsettled (I guess my nervous laugh kind of freaks people out?) but said he understood.

Fast-forward a couple months later, and there's this whole... situation. Extremely short version: I need a bunch of diamonds to restore my memories from before I died, the queen keeps stealing precious materials because she's possessed, and my friend wanted to use the diamonds in her hoard to do an exorcism. I pulled him aside and asked if I could call in the favor and get him to give me those diamonds for something really important, and he flat-out refused. Even though this was technically getting into strings-attached territory, I respect him a lot, so I settled for asking him to get me the diamonds after we'd done the ritual.

Anyway, we do the exorcism and it goes great, and I nudge my friend and ask him if he can help me grab the diamonds now, and he says "no, let's go out to eat first." Honestly I probably should've just stopped him right there, but I was really hungry at the time so I agreed. Everyone went out to eat, but after a while I started getting antsy and ducked outside to ask my friend to help me go get the diamonds like we'd agreed on. We headed out to the ritual site and uh oh! A mutual friend (?M) of ours apparently had a relapse in his kleptomania, because all of a sudden all the diamonds are gone, something that wouldn't have been a problem if my friend had just listened to me and gotten them right after the ritual!

A lot happened that night (specifically, the apocalypse -- long story, everyone's mostly okay now) and everyone sort of lost contact with each other for a few months before finally reconnecting. I notice my friend is avoiding me, but I figured he just needed some space or something and waited for him to come visit me. He did (I actually showed him the new house I'd gotten) and we chatted for a bit before I got tired of dancing around the issue and asked him if he was still going to keep his word -- and y'all, he just leaves. Doesn't even explain anything, he just turns around and leaves.

I figure, okay, maybe he just remembered something else he needed to do, but it's been several weeks now and every time I ask him if we're still going to work on the thing I asked him for or at least ask him for something different, he insists that I'm "holding it over his head" and he's "going to follow through, just not right now" and it is getting really frustrating. I asked him for something, I even compromised on that thing despite the fact that I technically didn't have to, and now apparently I'm the bad guy just because he's being a flake!

Also I think he might be planning a coup and/or my murder. AITA?

[under-lore]

The absolute state of Undercards

This isn't the kind of post i usually make, but well, theorists can make call out posts too. And regarding this topic, it seems that no one else is going to do it if i don't so...

I need to talk about Undercards. And particularly what's been going on behind the scenes in this fangame & its community and that it seems no one wants to speak up about. I've been thinking of doing this for a while and at this point i think i should just go ahead and explain it.

Okay, before we get into the controversy, i'll present the game a little bit for those who haven't heard of it. (And for those who don't care about this part, just scroll down a little bit until the next bold text.)

Undercards is an online multiplayer Undertale/Deltarune fangame which is basically just Yu-gi-oh or Hearthstone, except that cards, spells and such are all Undertale & Deltarune themed. It was popularised a few years ago mostly by youtuber Merg.

The gameplay looks something like this :

This game has a bit of a Gacha side, but it is entirely possible for any new FTP player to climb the ranks quite quickly or to obtain anything a P2W player could obtain somewhat easily, making it not unfair in that regard.

The game has an entertaining mastery curve and progress in ranked leagues (the main part of the game) is primarly decided by improvements in one's strategy regarding synergy of your deck, artifacts & soul, which are all to be chosen by the player to get the best chance at victory.

So, this all sounds like a pretty neat fangame, doesn't it ? So what's wrong ? What is the point of this post about ?

The issues

Whilst the game itself can indeed be quite fun, there exists a very serious problem regarding its community, and particularly its moderation team which sabotages its own game.

I'll start with some of the more minor issues before moving on to more important ones. I will also mention that i will not cover personal experiences (as much as i want to) and rather focus on larger trends to avoid biases or fallacious generalisations of individual cases.

The balance bias

The game has a very severe balance issue, which is nearly entirely caused by the moderators serving their own interests over that of the game.

Because here is the thing :

Many of the moderators (and by that i mean, the ones who's opinions seriously count for the balancing, really) are also the game's top players.

This game not only has greater rewards for achieving higher ranks every month, but even beyond the highest rank, it also has a live public leaderboard of the top players of each month.

However, if you check the monthly rankings of the game in any given season, the top spots are practically entirely monopolised by the moderators and by the alternative accounts of the moderators. (Some have had up to 5 accounts at once)

In other words, those who decide which cards should be buffed or nerfed are also the same people who will benefit or suffer from rebalancing their own cards, or know what tiny change to make to a card to suddenly make it very valuable in their specific decks.

This leads to some pretty silly situations, such as moderators buffing cards that genuinely deserved to be nerfed to secure their own interests. Or, on the other side of the issue, there are regularly cases where 9 out of the top 10 players all use the same clearly overpowered card in all of their decks, but the moderators will continue to deny that the card needs to be nerfed, because they do not want to have to nerf their own decks.

These things are all still happening, and they have been for years.

Because, well, they are the moderators, they have the authority and some of them have been here for up to 7 years, who is going to monitor them ?

After all, moderators are the law, they can do no wrong, right ?

Moderator incompetence and toxicity.

See, the team isn't just biased, they are also frankly incompetent at handling their own game in a facepalm-inducing manner.

For instance, remember how the main entertaining thing about this game was the strategy aspect of how to select your cards, artifacts and soul in order to get the best possible deck you can create and use it to make progress ?

Well, the game also has a spectating function. Which isn't a bad idea at all in itself. But it does have some major issues, like deck copying.

It is extremely easy for anyone to spectate the games of a very high rated player, and simply note down all the cards they play until you have their whole deck figured out. After this, you can easily copy it, and just play with this stronger person's deck and rank up that way, skipping what is quite literally the main interest of Undercards.

Not only does this ruin a large portion of the point of the game for the person that does it, but the more people do it, the more everyone everywhere starts running around using copies of the same few decks and making the game incredibly blend for everyone else overall as the thousands of possible way to make interesting decks slowly get reduced to no more than a dozen considered "viable" possible decks as you climb up the ranks.

...So what did the Undercards team do about this ?

...They created a hub menu where you can publish and downloads decks.

Yes, this is completely counter-productive.

Yes, this means that anyone can publish any deck for any player to find and use, they don't even need to copy the deck, it does that for them automatically.

Yes, this means that someone else can spectate your games, note down your deck, and publish it online for everyone to see, copy, or specifically prepare counters for. And they do.

Not only has the team not fixed those issues, but they have added features to make things more convenient for the perpetrators. They are actively encouraging people to be copycats and anti-fairplay, severely damaging their game's main strength on the way.

Oh, talking about stalking people and anti-fairplay...

The spectate feature has another massive problem : Sniping.

See, a game in Undercards lasts around 5 minutes & involves just two players, and there is rarely more than a couple dozen games going on at the same time. The game also has a very large matchmaking pool, meaning that you can pretty easily be paired against somebody considerably higher rated than yourself.

What this all means is that, by spectating somebody and then entering the playing queue right after this person's game ends, it is very easy to purposely stalk somebody in order to have a match against this particular person.

So, not only can someone stalk you and post your decks and/or strategies online, but anyone even much lower rated than you can look at it, build a counter deck that exists specifically to crush your particular deck, and then stalk you to repeatedly beat you and leech off your rank points.

And there is absolutely nothing that you can do about this.

The only solution is to log off and come back online when the sniper won't be present, or stalk the person back yourself to make sure you only launch games when you know they are already playing and can't be waiting for you, which is quite tiring.

Okay, well what did the team so about that one, then ? Surely even they wouldn't like the idea of being sniped, right ?

Heh... Well, its a bit trickier.

Officially, the practice is not allowed and a couple of them are actually against it. But in practice, most of them actually do not care, for the simple reason that part of them are guilty of doing such things themselves, and simply only take action when someones tries to do it back against them.

In fact, while i actually do not actually have proof for that one, i do also suspect that at least part of the moderators who have several accounts decide on which account they're going to play at a given time by checking which other players are online right now, and picking a deck/account accordingly for easier wins.

Their crappy behavior does not stop at only in-game things, though.

For instance, one person brought up to me that members of the staff have called his religion "garbage". Which needless to say, is extremely inappropriate and disrespectful.

Beyond being scummy, the team also just doesn't know how to handle their player base in general. For example, not so long ago, they shot themselves in the foot by creating two new ranks despite the fact that their player base was already too low to fill up the many ranks they already had. This means stretching up the rank differences between the players, which makes rank gain/loss disproportionate compared to one's actual current level and renders progression even more frustrating for medium level players, as well as generalising higher differences between players for matchmaking, which thus makes all the previously mentioned problems like sniping even worse. (All of that just to make things feel a bit more comfortable for those at the very top like the mods, who won't have to match with lower rated players as much.)

There could still be a couple more things for me to say, but i think the picture is already fairly clear. The team is purposely throwing the quality of their own game under the bus for little more reason than to stroke their ego by seeing their own names at the top of their leaderboards and overall just don't make very good decisions for their game even outside of all that.

Okay, but that was a whole lot of speaking, now how about i give an actual direct example of what the situation is currently like ?

Consider the existence of a user named "Sktima".

Skitma plays the game every day, but practically only ever uses the public chat to either :

Trash talk his opponents either during a game or after a loss.

Complain about the game's RNG, calling it "rigged" or "scripted".

Condescendingly mock and talk down on players rated below 2200 ELO (that is, over 98% of players) for being bad at the game.

If ever called out on this behavior, Sktima will infantilise the whistleblower, calling them a "whining little kid" or similar term before painting them as the bad guy instead, and attempting to bully them into leaving the chat. (and holding grudges against them later on, too.)

All the while, of course, being arrogantly mocking and acting like he considers himself as superior to others.

The question is : How long do you think it took for this player to be banned ?

I encourage you to think about this for a second, before continuing to read.

...

...Okay, have you made your guess yet ?

Well, it was a trick question..

Sktima was never banned at all, for the very simple reason that Sktima is a part of the moderation team.

He even has a YT, too. And it kinda speaks for itself, honestly.

For those interested, here are a couple extracts from a conversation he had in the comments with somebody pointing out that with the size of that community, issues like sniping or hand peeking (another big problem i didn't bring up caused by another bad feature that allows you to directly see the opponent's hand with another tab via the in-game friend option) were bound to happen with the way the mod team handled some features.

Be warned, a good amount of rudeness as well as lying & manipulating to try and turn the situation backwards...

Im not going to analyse or detail more any of that nor point out some of the blatant irony in this conversation, but what i will bring up is that throughout all this, they've made their stance rather clear :

None of this is the fault of the moderator team, they consider that only the player base itself is to blame for the current state of the game, not them.

The underground status.

The thing is, a lot of players aren't oblivious to this, but won't speak a word when staff is present.

In just a couple weeks for instance, at least three separate users have admitted in the chats they thought Sktima was insufferable, including one which claimed he was "the most toxic person on the site." But all this was only at low activity times when the team members were offline.

This was even more obvious on discord, where the only results you could find when searching for "Undercards" in the history of other Undertale/Deltarune related discord servers were people complaining about how toxic the Undercards staff was.

People frequently complain about a lot of the previously mentioned gameplay issues like sniping, but it seems nobody dares to speak up about the actual responsibles, likely due to their position of power and because they consider it as a fait accompli.

Undercards is a great game with has the potential to be very fun, but it and its community are practically being held hostage by the game's staff, and yet it seems the community has just given up on itself and mostly accepted this unfair status quo. This kind of thing shouldn't be allowed to continue.

[dream-a-little-bigger-x]

Johnny and Dora | Spencer Reid

Add yourself to my taglist! | Here’s my masterlist!

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Gun use, mention of alcohol, not proofread

Author's note: This is basically the episode from Brooklyn 99 in season two where Amy and Jake get together. I'm fully aware that the BAU might not work on an identity theft case, but let's just pretend they do for the sake of this story, yeah?  

Words: 4.078

Y/N wasn’t too sure how she’d ended up in this position. One minute she was trying to catch Brooklyn’s most prolific identity thief they had been chasing for days in New York, the next she had her co-worker pressed up against a tree with her lips on his. 

It had all started when the BAU team was sent to Brooklyn, New York to investigate an identity theft that had been haunting Brooklyn for a couple months now. The team was working hard to find the man responsible for the crime, working every possible angle and trying to figure out the how and why before actually going en-route to catch the guy. 

“Tonight, Augustine will be handing off the laptop to a buyer from China,” Detective Peralta told them, concluding his briefing to the BAU team. 

Hotch nodded his head before turning to his team. “Reid, Y/L/N, I want you tailing Augustine until he makes the drop, then arrest him and the buyer.”

“Good call, though I suppose I could take Morgan,” Spencer objected with a light tone. “I’m sure Y/L/N has something better to do…” 

“No, I don’t,” she replied, confused as to why he would say that. 

“Really?” asked Spencer. “‘Cause I swore I overheard you saying to Prentiss you didn’t like… tailing… people…” 

Y/N stared at him with an incredulous look. “You think I said that?” 

“Word for word,” Spencer said with a slow nod of his head as though he was trying to convince no one but himself. 

Y/N stared at the man in disbelief until Hotch cut in between the two. “All right, enough. Prentiss and Morgan will join them in a surveillance van.” 

The detectives and the BAU team all dispersed. Y/N was determined to find out what was happening with Spencer. They had gotten along since the day she joined the team over a year ago. To say his sudden change of demeanor towards her confused her was an understatement. 

“Okay, what did I do?” she asked, slamming the door of the breakroom shut so the two of them had some privacy. Spencer looked up from where he was making his coffee, confusion written in his eyes. “Why are you so bent on keeping me off this case?” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Spencer muttered as he turned back to his coffee. 

Scoffing, y/n shook her head. “Come on, Spence. Is it because I finished your report for you last week? Because I was just trying to help you. I knew you wanted to leave early to call your mother.” 

With a sigh, Spencer turned to look at the woman. “I don’t care about that. I appreciate you doing that.” 

“Then what is it?” 

Inhaling deeply as if to calm himself down, Spencer put down his hot coffee again and took a few tentative steps towards y/n. He stuffed his hands in his pockets to keep him from fidgeting so much. “The reason I didn’t want to work with you is–” he puffed out a nervous breath. “C-can you not look at me like that?” he asked, suddenly changing the topic. 

Y/N was looking at him with interest, her head tilted ever so slightly, her eyes swimming with worry. 

“Like what?” 

“Never mind,” he grumbled and went back to his coffee. 

“No, Spence. Tell me what’s going on so I can fix it. I hate having  you mad at me.” 

Taking another deep breath, Spencer’s eyes met y/n’s. “Fine… I just… Remember when you told me you’d never want to date any law enforcement?” Y/N nodded her head slowly, trying to understand what he was saying. “It kinda… It kinda bummed me out?” 

“What?” The one-worded question came out in a soft whisper. 

“I was kind of thinking about asking you out…” 

Y/N’s breath hitched in her throat. “Oh… Okay…” she brought out, not really sure what else to tell him. 

“But I know that that’s not what you want, and I totally get it…” 

“Spence…” y/n heaved in a deep breath. “This is weird… And the whole reason for me not dating anyone in the field is so it wouldn’t be weird at work, you know?” 

Spencer offered her a soft smile. “Okay, then just– let’s make it not weird, okay? This is a case; we work cases together all the time, and we’re really good at it, so, you know, we’re professionals.” 

“That’s all I want,” y/n responded steadfastly. “For us to be professional.” 

Nodding his head, Spencer reached for his coffee again and as he passed y/n, he placed a hand on her shoulder and squeezed it reassuringly. 

Later that day, Spencer, y/n, Derek and Emily followed behind Augustine in their surveillance van. The bright red car they’d been following brought them to a fancy-looking restaurant. 

Confused, y/n turned to her co-workers. “Why’s he getting out here?” she asked. “I thought that detective told us he was going to be dropping it off at the park?” 

“Maybe he’s having dinner with his sidepiece first,” Emily countered. 

Y/N’s eyes landed on the object in Augustine’s hand. “He’s got the laptop with him,” she told them. “We should just arrest him right here.” 

“No,” Spencer replied. “The buyer’s the bigger collar. We gotta follow him in and wait for the handoff.” 

Nodding her head, y/n moved to open the door, only for Derek to stop her. “You can’t go in like that. You look like FBI.” 

“Right, you’re right,” y/n whispered as she shook off her blazer and unbuttoned her shirt a little further. “How’s that?” she asked Spencer, who was sitting next to her. A blush fanned his cheeks and reached the tips of his ears as he turned away from her. 

“I don’t know,” he stuttered. 

Emily chuckled at Spencer’s nervous behavior while Derek shook off his leather jacket. “Here, wear this,” Derek said and handed the black piece of clothing to her. Surprisingly, Derek’s jacket fit her very well. 

Once the jacket was hanging off her shoulders, she turned to Spencer and untied his tie. “What are you doing?” he asked, nervously while she lifted his tie over his head and handed it to Emily. 

“For heaven’s sake, Spence, just trust me,” she all but grumbled and unbuttoned a couple of his buttons too. “All right, think we’re good to go.” 

The two of them walked inside the restaurant, scanning the place for the suspect. “Did you know that restaurants are germ-infected? Even the tables are germ-hotspots, especially during rush-hours when the staff is more focused on giving peop–” 

“Spence,” y/n nudged him to shut him up. 

“Right, sorry,” he whispered. “Do you have eyes on–”

Y/N grabbed his arm and cleared her throat. Once Spencer’s eyes landed on who she had seen, he smiled politely. “The hostess stand,” he finished his sentence. “Hi. Table for two, please.” 

The suspect and his girlfriend were right in front of him, talking to the hostess. 

“Oh, I’m sorry, there’s nothing available. We’re totally booked up,” the woman replied. 

Knowing they weren’t going to get in unless they had a really good reason for the woman to make an exception. Without thinking twice about it, she grabbed Spencer’s bicep and leaned in closer to him. “Oh, that’s horrible. Tonight’s a really big night for us. Johnny and I just got engaged and this is where we had our first date,” she said dreamily. 

Spencer looked down at her for a moment in surprise. Over the years of having known her, he’d wanted her to say something along those lines for a very long time. While she was oblivious to his little crush, the rest of their co-workers weren’t, which is why it was always them two who got paired up to do stuff like this. 

“Oh, yeah, it would mean so much to Dora and me…” Spencer chimed in, jumping on the idea immediately. “I-I would’ve made reservations, but I didn’t know if she was going to say yes…” 

“Aww, I love how nervous you were, you little goose,” she cooed before leaning up and kissing his cheek, catching the man completely off guard. 

The look he gave her was one of surprise mixed with confusion. He had no clue what was happening. 

“You two are just the cutest,” the hostess said with a hand over her heart. “I’m sure we can find room for two young lovers.” 

It was the way she said it that made the butterflies in her stomach well up. Aside from herself, no one had ever even thought about them being lovers, let alone called them it. 

“Yeah,” Spencer croaked. “We are two lovers… Together… In beds…” 

“Okay,” she whispered, trying to keep her composure. 

The hostess asked them to follow her to the waiting area and told them they just needed a moment to free up a table for them. As y/n and Spencer stood together at the high table, she couldn’t help but glance over at him. He looked very handsome tonight. Having decided to discard his tie and loosen up a couple of buttons was a good call. She couldn’t deny that it did look very good on him. 

“Sorry about springing that engagement stuff on you,” y/n told him. 

Spencer shook his head. “No, no, no. That was great. It’s what’s got us in here.” He inhaled sharply before jokingly adding, “The cheek-kiss was a bit much though. And wet.” 

Smirking, y/n tilted her head a little. “What can I tell you? Dora’s sloppy.” 

Both of them chuckled but before either could add anything else, the hostess reappeared at their table. “All right, your table is ready. You can follow me.” 

They nodded their heads and followed behind the woman. “Okay, we can go back to being Spencer and y/n on the lookout for the suspect,” Spencer muttered, almost glad he didn’t have to sit through an entire dinner pretending he was madly in love with her as it wouldn’t even be pretending on his part. It would kill him knowing that all of it would be over when the case was done. 

“All right, there you go,” the hostess said, placing down the menus on their table. When the couple co-workers looked up, they realized they had gotten a table right next to the suspect and his date. 

The girlfriend gasped as she turned to y/n and Spencer. “You’re the couple that just got engaged.” 

“That’s us!” Spencer exclaimed as he reached for y/n’s hand. “Johnny and Dora,” he said, holding up your intertwined hands. “Definitely a couple…” 

Y/N and Spencer took their seats, both of them chuckling nervously. Augustine and his girlfriend even sprung them champagne and oysters to celebrate their fake engagement. 

“Wow, champagne and oysters,” y/n said with a sarcastic tone. “You really shouldn’t have, guys.” 

“Well, it’s a special night,” said Augustine. “So when did you guys meet?” 

Not having practiced any of this, the two lovebirds weren’t quite in sync with their backstory. “Last year,” y/n responded while Spencer went for “Two years ago.” 

Upon seeing the confused looks of Augustine and his companion, y/n chuckled. “We first met two years ago but we don’t count it because…” 

“I was dating a super smart scientist,” Spencer finished her sentence. 

“And I was dating the bassist of an up-and-coming Brooklyn-based band,” y/n continued the lie. 

“Anyways, about a year ago, we bumped into each other again in a bar and…” Spencer turned to y/n with a soft look on his face. “We haven’t been able to keep our hands off each other since.” 

Y/N hummed, unable to wipe the smile on her face. 

Augustine’s girl propped her head up on her hand, her elbow resting on the table. “So, how did you know she was the one?” she asked Spencer dreamily. 

Sighing, Spencer turned back to his fake-fiancée. “I’d love to answer that,” he said, surprising y/n a little. She was curious to hear what he was going to come up with. “Um, you know, just whenever I look at her face… and the… attached physique,” he answered a little awkwardly as though he didn’t want to say what he actually thought of her. 

“And you?” the girl asked y/n. 

Y/N’s eyes locked with Spencer’s and she couldn’t help but smile as her insides melted at the sight of his honeycomb eyes. “He’s the smartest guy I know and … he makes me laugh,” she responded honestly. 

“And, you know,” Spencer chimed in again, looking at the other couple. “There’s really no one else’s opinion who I care about more than hers, so…” When he looked back up at Y/N, he saw something in her eyes that he had never seen before and Spencer had studied those beautiful eyes before, remembering every detail about it thanks to his eidetic memory. 

“Okay, so enough chit-chat, let’s see the ring!” 

Panicking a little, y/n moved the ring from her ring finger on the right side to to one on the left before showing her hand to the woman. The ring was one she had gotten from her grandma when she had graduated from the academy. Y/N had always worn it as a token of good luck. It was the thing that kept her safe. 

The girl gasped. “It’s beautiful!” she exclaimed as she studied it. The band looked like twigs from the rose bushes in her grandmother’s garden with a small diamond that presented the rose. It reminded y/n of the days she’d spent at her grandparents’ house and helped her grandma with the rose bushes. 

“When I saw this ring, I knew I had to get it for her as it reminded me of the rose bushes her grandma had in her garden. Whenever Dora talks about spending time with her grandma in the garden, her eyes light up like a child’s on Christmas Eve and I just knew…” Spencer explained and though y/n knew in the back of her mind that all of this was just a ruse, she couldn’t help but turn into mush on the inside. 

How y/n survived the entire dinner without turning into a puddle, she didn’t know, but she somehow managed to get through to dessert. 

“Can you get the car from the valet, babe?” Augustine said to his girlfriend, handing her the keys. “I’m gonna go in the back and say hi to the chef.” Spencer and y/n exchanged glances when they noticed Augustine reaching for the laptop. 

“Good luck on your wedding, guys,” the girl said to them. “Oh, have fun on your honeymoon!”

“We will,” Spencer replied. “We’re going to Waco, Texas,” he said a little too excitedly. 

The girl looked at him for a moment before chuckling, “Huh, okay. Bye!” 

“Bye,” y/n greeted, giving her a wave that she couldn’t even see anymore, before turning to Spencer. “Waco, Texas?” 

“I’m sorry,” Spencer hissed. “It just slipped out.”

Shaking her head, y/n put the napkin down on her half-eaten dessert before scraping her chair back. “Let’s go, Augustine’s making the drop.” 

Spencer nodded and followed y/n to the kitchen where they found Augustine with the chef. “Look, there’s the buyer,” y/n pointed out, but then got confused when Augustine didn’t hand over the laptop. “Or he’s just actually saying hi to the chef?” 

As Augustine turned, his eyes landed on the couple near the door. “Oh, no. He’s seen us,” Spencer whispered and before he could properly think twice about it, he cupped y/n’s cheeks and kissed her on the lips. 

Confused and surprised, y/n wasn’t too sure what to do but then decided to follow along and melted into the kiss. His lips somehow slotted perfectly with hers and the tingle in the pit of her stomach felt natural. 

“Excuse me,” Augustine’s voice interrupted them. 

“Oh, sorry,” Spencer apologized. “We were just looking for a place to, uh…” 

A little groggy from that spine-tingling kiss, y/n finished Spencer’s sentence while holding onto him for dear life. “Boink…” 

“Yep. Boink…” Spencer agreed. “That’s my preferred term for it as well.” 

Y/N nodded her head to try and sell the point further. “I get it,” Augustine then said. “Newly engaged kids. Enjoy.” 

The couple watched as Augustine was out of sight before springing apart. “Good. Good, good, good, good,” Spencer mumbled, trying to convince himself. We kept our cover intact. Nice work.” 

“Quick professional thinking out there, Reid. Very quick. Very professional,” y/n rambled, not entirely thinking straight just yet. 

Trying to keep up his poise and to remind himself that they are, in fact, working, Spencer held out his hand for her to shake, which she quickly did. “Agent,” he said ceremonially. 

“Doctor,” y/n responded before the two of them headed out of the restaurant. 

As the couple joined their co-workers in the van again, they felt a little awkward. Neither of them was saying anything. Not to each other. Not to Emily and Derek. The two at the front found it slightly weird that Spencer wasn’t spewing facts and y/n wasn’t singing along to one of her favorite songs that was playing on the radio. 

“Okay, you’re being weird,” Derek pointed out. “What happened?” 

“Spencer and I kissed,” y/n responded with a roll of her eyes. 

“WHAT?!” Emily and Derek exclaimed simultaneously. 

“It was just to keep our cover from being blown,” Spencer responded. “We didn’t have a choice.” 

“Tell me everything!” Emily ordered, overly excited. 

Y/N shook her head. “Em, there’s nothing to tell, okay? It was for work. It was nothing.” She repeated the words in her head to convince herself that it was indeed nothing. That what she felt when Spencer’s lips were on hers was just a reaction to someone kissing her. That it wasn’t because it was Spencer kissing her. 

“Yeah, who cares about a kiss? Call me when you grab each other’s asses,” Derek chimed in. “He’s pulling over,” he then said when the red car in front of them had his blinker on. 

“Nothing like that is gonna happen, okay?” Spencer said before citing some facts about how in theater, the leads of the play almost never fall in love with one another and that it always just stays on-stage. 

“Guys, it’s not a handout,” Derek informed them as they watched Augustine drop off the case, cutting Spencer’s fact-spewing short. “It’s a drop-off.” 

“Okay,” y/n said. “Em, you and Derek follow Augustine.” 

“Right, and you two, follow your hearts,” Emily added, causing y/n to roll her eyes. 

“No, we’re gonna stay with the package.” 

Y/N and Spencer got out of the car and hid behind a tree to keep an eye out on the laptop case. The air was chilly for a summer evening, so y/n was glad she was still wearing Derek’s jacket. 

Spencer turned to y/n. “We’re cool, right?” 

“Yeah, totally,” y/n answered determinedly. “We’re fine.” 

“Good,” Spencer nodded. “You know, I’m actually quite hungry. I never really ended up eating anything at that fancy restaurant.” 

“Same. You know what I’m gonna get when I get to the hotel?” she asked with a grin. 

Spencer nodded his head. “Yeah, you’re gonna order Burger King and you’re gonna get the Crispy Chicken burger with cheesy chili fries, onion rings and a grape Sprite,” he summed up without hesitation. The fact that he’d remembered her exact order from Burger King surprised her and surprisingly also turned her on a little bit. 

“That’s exactly what I’m gonna get…” she mumbled, trying to shake off the feeling. 

While Spencer went on a ramble about what he was going to eat, y/n was distracted by the man a few feet away from them, closer to the package. She wasn’t paying much attention to anything Spencer was saying as she was trying to determine whether or not that was their UnSub. 

“Spence,” y/n tried to cut him off, but he kept on going with some facts about the restaurant he always went to. “Spence, he’s looking at us…” Before Spencer could turn his head to look at whatever y/n was looking at, she had already grabbed his face and brought his lips to hers, pressing him against the tree. 

Once again ignoring the feeling in the pit of her stomach, y/n opened an eye to watch the buyer walk off with the laptop in hand. She detached herself from Spencer and reached for her gun, stopping the guy in his tracks. 

“FBI! Freeze! We are co-workers!” she yelled, mostly to remind herself. 

“You’re under arrest!” Spencer joined in, pointing his gun at the man, too. “This is a work event!” 

Later that night, y/n found herself in her hotel room, pacing the floor with her crispy chicken burger getting colder and colder with every minute she didn’t touch it. She couldn’t stop her brain from rethinking everything that had happened that day. Every time she remembered the kiss with Spencer, her insides tingled and her heart skipped several beats. 

None of this made sense. She had been able to go about her days for the last year without thinking about Spencer this way. The thought had crept up on her once or twice, but she had always managed to shake it off. Why was this time so different? 

Before she could rethink everything, a knock on her door caused her to snap out of it. She secretly prayed it was JJ or Emily, just so she could rehash the whole thing and get everything off her chest. Though when she opened the door, she didn’t find JJ nor Emily there, but instead she was looking into those beautiful honey eyes that had melted her insides mere hours ago. 

“Spencer, I–” 

“Can I come in?” he asked, not allowing her to finish her sentence. Nodding, y/n stepped aside and let him in, closing the door right after. “A lot has happened today, huh?” he asked, wringing his hands in nervousness. 

“Yeah, I-I guess so…” 

Spencer sighed as he let go of his hands and stepped closer to y/n. “Look, y/n, I don’t want anything to get weird between us, okay? I understand why you don’t wanna date anyone in the field and I respect that. So, can we just forget today happened?”  

Going over her options, y/n’s mind skidded back and forth between every kiss and every word they had shared today. She could either ignore everything she had felt today and agree with him, forgetting about it all. Or she could take the plunge and try to figure it out with him. 

“I don’t think I can, Spencer,” she whispered. 

Spencer’s head tilted slightly as his brows furrowed in confusion. “Wh-what do you mean? I–” 

Before he could finish his sentence, y/n took two long strides towards him and cupped his cheeks, much like she had done before in the park, and kissed him deeply. At first, Spencer wasn’t quite sure what was happening, but he quickly melted into her body, grabbing her by the waist to pull her closer. 

“Y/N!” Emily’s voice sounded before they heard the knock on her door. “Can we go out for some drinks?!” 

Y/N looked up at Spencer and offered him a soft smile. “I’ll be right down! Order a Chardonnay for me, will you?” 

The two of them waited until they heard the footsteps of their co-worker recede before heading out the door together. Neither of them said anything. Neither of them needed to, either. They knew what they felt for one another was real and that they needed to figure something out, but that was not going to happen tonight. 

But whatever they would figure out, they would have to thank Johnny and Dora for pushing them this far.  

Everything taglist: @calamitykaty @littlemissaddict @n0wornever @wanniiieeee @unnowhatthisistbh @Jassy122

[sco07ut]

what just happened!!!!!!!! s19 rambles (negative) ↓

going to be messy cos im just planning on writing whatever outrageous moments stand out as i go along

first of all????? DOC FUCKING DIED?????????? i literally had to rewatch a few times to realise that’s what they were saying 😟 when the fuck did he die bc doc eas Inside the staff of charon and wash was fuckijg idk?? on the surface of chorus right?? how did doc die saving him what (genuinely someone smarter than me if you’ve figured it out please tell me) bc like the point of the charon fight is that they were stuck in the mementos room right? idk

anyway he was done so dirty i literally do not think there was a reason to reveal doc was dead in the last five minutes

on that note, where was donut?? did he die too ? how long after chorus is s19 set like was that undisclosed location iris or what. did he do his whole ‘tour of the universe’ thing early? like i would’ve been fine with even just a passing comment but they were so vague with it

WHY DID SARGE DIE AND THEN PROMPTLY BECOME IRRELEVANT????? aside from simmons grif & caboose not a Soul mentioned the fact that a whole man was dead. i was so convinced that there would be some big funeral with everyone attending at the end

i did sort of like the plot though, simmons getting a leadership role was kinda fun

tbh i did like simmons this season it was so great seeing him finally get recognition but good grief i cannot talk about simmons without bringing up the ending/lack of grimmons

it makes sense that they wouldn’t get together if grif went home and simmons stayed in the army BUT WHY DID SIMMONS STAY IN THE ARMY?? RICHARD YOU DO NOT HAVE A FUCKING TEAM ANYMORE (on that note. where did lopez go. i’m only just realising that he literally vanished) i’m so insane why did they do that. they could’ve gone home together. and kissed about it idk

i mean i didn’t actually expect grimmons to happen but i thought they’d stay together?? it’s always been them. like that’s the whole point of their characters. every other person who’s been on their team before has died and left them (grif sleeping through being glassed, hammer dying during basic, the red team at rat’s nest and now sarge and donut i guess?????) why did they not stay together

also on the grif family note, the kai cameo was nice (though i will say i do Not understand the point of the whole retro con thing, i feel like it went on for ages, did nothing to set up the plot. the meta could’ve been introduced some other way surely)

also while i’m thinking about it, why did it take tucker/the meta months to get from chorus to a point where he was actively searching for epsilon ?

anyway sorry kai cameo fun but she should’ve had a bigger role idc

it kind of feels like they suddenly realised almost all their female characters were overlooked and they tried to shove them in to be like ‘ohhh look we care about our female characters’ and then screwed them over by making them either insignificant or nothing more than a cameo

with the exception of tex maybe. i fully did not expect her to come back prior to watching but when caboose was like oh help me remember i started to get a feeling it wouldn’t be church. i’m also so glad they addressed the whole ‘created from failure/destined to fail’ thing, tex fuckijg deserved that win. sad that she died though (i wasn’t expecting that either and was like fully geared up to start making post restoration fanart of carolina and tex hanging out and learning how to be friends/family again)

idk i just feel like we missed out on so much stuff due to time constraints, there were so many scenes that should’ve been put in imo like carolina and tex having some sort of moment together, grif and kai having a moment, carolina & wash seeing 479er again

ok wait different chain of thought. everyone was like really eager to kill tucker. there was no moral dilemma of everyone being like ohh beneath the meta hes our friend we can’t hurt him but we still need to take him down what’re we gonna doo. although on second thought it was red team so . yeah the mindless attacking does make sense a bit

new thought again overall it just felt weird like everyone had their assigned pairings and couldn’t acknowledge anyone outside of them?? like during the fights there wasn’t much of a reunion when tex/carolina joined and then wash (and apparently not fucking doc) like idk. i was under the assumption thatvthere would be a sweet little scene where they got the gang back together

whatever man that’s everything off the top of my head. i had no expectations going in and still somehow left disappointed. i Will be making an au version that fits all the things i wanted to see

[iamyoursonly]

Sunsets (6/11/2023)

suddenly wanted to write this idk bro but life seems harder rn

As the remaining bit of the sunset gleamed over the horizon, after the last bit of light entered my eyes, everything seemed like it was all gone, as if all was left, but except for the street lights near where I was sitting. Looking down to my feet, I realised that the shadows on the ground weren’t plural anymore, it was just me myself and I. The other shadow was long gone…

Holding up my pen after getting home and trying to concentrate on my work was hard, especially when you somehow broke up with me out of nowhere. All those “I love you”s and “I would never leave you”s were lies, because what else could men do but lie.

Despite us going through hard times together for 14 long years, you decided the bonding wasn’t enough and left me. Where was the sense in that?! God, please let me just disappear from this world. All that loathe I have felt towards you seemed to have exploded in my thoughts, and I couldn’t help but bawl my eyes out at every thought of you.

Deep down I knew — I still loved you.

Gojo Satoru, I still remember your name. As if our breakup was yesterday, but time has passed since and it’s been almost 5 years. Our immature years were over and we were both working for our society, making money and just being alive for this sole purpose.

A chorus of delirium rushed through my head when I got accepted into my dream job — being a teacher at a high school. But life was unfair, I know, I’ve been through it all before. My delirium was destroyed when you showed up as my teacher in charge. I was basically devastated.

Maybe you were 27, but you didn’t act like it. You were just an over grown child even at work, I mean why did they accept you into the school even when you’re just a giant baby!

“Well look at that isn’t it my favourite youngster?” You’d say and look at me, I had to curse under my breath before looking at you in the face with a smile, “Mr. Gojo, may I inform you that I’m merely two years younger than you?” And when you pout and start acting childish again, the memories of us being together appeared in my mind again, it was as if fate brought back us together in this school.

My delusions were crushed when you had announced your engagement with another pretty lady, whom you apparently met a few months prior. It was almost so obvious that your mother set you up with her, but it wasn’t like you to agree without throwing a whole tantrum. But that smile you had on your face while giving me the invite to your wedding seemed genuine, and what could I do but respect your decision.

Denial is a river in Egypt, I know. But maybe it’s also what I’m feeling right now, how could you choose her over me though? I thought I had gotten over you, but all those thoughts just keep coming back to my head. “How could you do this to me, Gojo.” I mumbled, in my own house.

On the day of your wedding, it felt illegal to show up, but you sounded so anticipated to have me show up to your wedding, and have I ever said no to you? Never. So I went, in the dress that you bought me on our 4th dating anniversary. It was blue, just like your eyes. And that time of the day, was the sunset, my favourite time of the day.

When I arrived, you looked so handsome in that white suit, I might just faint from looking at you, and we might have made some brief eye contact before you broke it, and that tiny blush on your face was quite visible too.

The vows. I hated it, why would you vow to love a woman you didn’t want to marry, oh how I wished you would’ve pulled me onto the stage and married me instead…

“Would you, Gojo Satoru, be the legal husband of Naoko Tsurugi and love her forever?”

“No.” You spoke. That stern look in your eyes sent shivers down my spine, but thank god you spoke up. The girl you married also opposed your marriage too, and said she had someone she wanted to marry. Your gaze looked soft, as if a stone was lifted from your heart.

I’d thank the heavens if they gave me a chance to savour your love again, and I’d never thank it enough when you pulled me on the stage and asked me to marry you instead. Naoko didn’t seem opposed at all, instead, she was the biggest supporter and told us to kiss.

“Well what do you say princess, would you like us to get married?”

“What if I say no.”

“You wouldn’t say no to me.”

What could I say, those years of bonding really made us lucky. And it seems like I could never get rid of Gojo Satoru. But I love it so much.

Only that sunset finally had two silhouettes.

master list

sunrise

[krirebr]

♠️ Aspec stuff - I hope this is not disrespectful but I'm wondering how you found out? I'm bi and I remember the moment I found out clearly. Everything suddenly made sense and clicked into place. Did you have a moment like that?

Not disrespectful at all!! And my answer is, yes? Sort of? It was a very long journey that ended decisively.

It can be really hard, I think, to define the absence of something, rather than a presence. I only ever had my own experiences, so I spent my teenage years assuming what I was feeling was the same as everyone else. Also, it was the late 90s, early aughts, and we just really didn't talk about queer stuff nearly as much, especially not identities outside of being gay.

Around the time I turned 20, I finally started realizing that my experience probably wasn't what my straight friends felt. I also was fairly certain I wasn't gay. In 2005/6, the only other orientation that was really out there was bi, so I figured that's what I had to be. I mean, it made a bit of sense. My attraction to both men and women was basically the same. I just didn't have the vocabulary then to understand that that level of attraction was 0. But I also always knew that the bi label didn't really fit. But I had to be something!

So I really fumbled all the way through my twenties. I was much happier when I wasn't trying to hook up or date, but that couldn't be ok, right? Everything and everyone was telling me that I'd be happier if I was in a relationship and if I wasn't a virgin anymore. So, every few years, I would force myself to get on the apps, or let my friends set me up with someone and it was always awful. It always made me miserable.

And I was getting really frustrated with this part of my identity still being such a question mark. It was really starting to weigh on me.

So, a few months before I turned 30, I got on Tinder. And it was the worst one yet. I hated matching with people, I hated talking to people, I hated going on dates. Like once, I went out with a guy and on the date he told me he was married and I was so fucking relieved. It meant I never had to go out with him again and I wouldn't have to feel bad about it. 😂

After another bad round of dating, I was talking to my sister about how frustrated I was, and she said, "I just listened to a podcast about this thing called 'asexuality' and it actually made me think about you. I hope that's ok." And that night, I listened to the podcast episode. And it wasn't great - it was two straight, cis, white guys talking about something they didn't really understand, but it pointed me towards asexuality.org and their FAQ and that was my lightning strike moment. It defined not just asexuality, but also aromanticism and I was like "Oh! This is me!" And yeah, that's when everything snapped into place, and everything I'd done that I'd never quite been able to make sense snapped into focus.

It was still a bit of a journey after that to fully define these words for myself. But yeah, that was my moment. And things got a lot better, and easier, and happier for me after that.

Thank you for asking Jaqui and letting me share!! 💜💜

Kris's 700 Celebration

[hsmtmts-arrows]

okay SO basically, i was kinda half-asleep and half dreaming, yk??? like the thoughts just Come to u. it was like that

( /// TW TRANSPHOBIC LILY BECAUSE SHE SUCKS . ALSO SOME INTERNALIZED TRANSPHOBIA BC RICKY'S GOIN THRU IT // )

(i'd put it under a read more but. it's an ask)

so basically ricky was trans and had already told gina and a few of the wildcats, and just like in s2 canon he stays with lily for a while and. yk how ricky is abt to go w lily when he finds his harness and realizes she stole it and tried to ruin the show?

yeah, well.

when he does, she gets way way more defensive than in canon, and rebutts with a "well, you didn't tell me you're a girl so we can call it even."

ricky's heart drops. soul shatters. he feels hot and cold at once. he can only respond with a feeble, "what?" that's weak even to his own ears.

"i mean, come on, richie... what's even your real name?" her eyes light up. "rachel? rose? r—"

"stop." he whispers, and she rolls her eyes. "how did you—"

"i found out weeks ago." she tells him with a flippant wave of the hand, and he waits, but she doesn't elaborate. "i mean, how long are you planning to keep up this... delusion? you know it can't last forever, richie, or whoever you really are. do the wildcats even know?"

"yes." he says, trying to bring up anything of defiance even though his heart is seizing and catching. "and they—they support me no matter—"

"do they really see you like that, richie?" she's suddenly sympathetic, and he knows she means it like a balm, but it feels like acid. "i mean, they're obviously just doing it to humour you."

"you don't know that." it can't be true.

"nobody sane would endorse people like you."

i have to go. i have to go. i have to go. ihavetogoihavetogo i have to go i have t o go i h av e to leaveleaveleaveleaveleave—

and then it cuts to ricky and gina, during one of those nights where ricky sneaks into gina's room, and they're cuddled up together in her bed. and she's saying something, giggling, but he's barely there. his binder feels too tight and he's probably had it on too long but he doesn't care. every time someone sees him, they'll assume he's cis, and he can use that against lily's words that still feel like poison, even months later.

"hey, ricky? ricky?" gina waves a hand in front of his face and he startles. she blinks in surprise. "oh. didn't mean to scare you."

"wasn't scared." he replies in a voice a few octaves high. (you didn't tell me you were a girl.) he makes his voice a little lower. "sorry, zoned out there for a second, gi. fire away." he tries for a smile.

gina sits up, frowning, concern over every inch of her features. "ricky? are you okay?"

what's even your real name?

"it's nothing." he says. his chest is too tight. how long has he had his binder? how long is he going to keep pretending? fuck. fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck—

"ricky, i can tell something's bothering you." she grabs one of his hands and rubs circles into the knuckle. "i want to help."

her clock ticks. ticks. ticks.

he sighs and gina, after a second, lays back down where she was.

"you know how i was... with lily? i wasn't dating her," he adds quickly, noticing the crease between her brows. "but like, at the beginning of camp, i was going to go skiing with her, remember?"

"yeah." gina says, visibly unsure of where this is going.

"yeah... well... i found my harness. my beast harness." gina's eyes go wide and he can see her basically plotting murder right here and there. "and when i confronted her about it, she—she started... saying some things?" his voice wobbles dangerously and gina turns more to look at him, eyes openly worried.

"what things?" she says, with a dangerous edge to her voice.

he tries to calm his breathing. it's not working. he's feeling that tight feeling again. usually it goes away when he's with gina, or just with the wildcats, but ever since lily said those things, they've been working less and less.

"she said you guys were just... were just...."

"just what? ricky?"

"just humouring... me." he tries to take in a breath but it comes out as a sob. gina straightens, alarmed. "humouring that i'm—i'm a boy."

"oh, ricky." gina sits up and he does too, and she wraps her arms around him and he cries and cries and cries. "i'm going to kill that bitch—"

"because i'm not, am i?!"

"no, ricky, you are. lily's a deceitful prick who manipulated you." gina lets go to look him in the eyes. "you are richard bowen. you're a boy and always will be—so long as you identify as one, of course." gina hurries to add (and he remembers glimpsing her on a trans-positive subreddit the other day under the question, how do i support my trans boyfriend????? she'd closed it when he came over, but he saw it, and his heart sang.) "and i promise none of us are 'humouring' you. okay?"

that's all i remember JASHJSHJHJSJHASHJSJ

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I LOVE IT WHY WERE YOU EVEN PANICKING ABOUT IT BEING A LONG ASK FUCK LILY BTW BUT OHHHHHHH RINA RINA RINA ILY RINA GINA IS THE ALLY OF ALL TIME I LOVE HER I LOVE TRANS!RICKY HE DESERVES THE WORLD OH MY GOD

[miketownsends]

i found blaseball in season 3.

the very end of season 3, and i remember i only found it because one of the NITW creators tweeted something along the lines of “ok i’ll bite what’s blaseball” and i went “what IS blaseball?” and i Googled it and suddenly there i was

i picked the Garages because i always have been and always will be a Seattlite at heart - i remember briefly deliberating over the Tacos (who were just the LA Tacos at the time!) and a couple other teams, but the Seattle pull was too strong

i remember that i joined either very late on Saturday or very early on Sunday - it was post the s3 finals because i remember seeing the Tigers as the s3 champions, but it was pre-election because i remember casting my lone vote for Eat the Rich

but this was RIGHT before the first siesta, and i had no idea what the timeline of a season looked like, and i went “well i guess i’ll check back in later” and then basically completely forgot about it for the next couple weeks and might’ve forgotten forever if i hadn’t seen another tweet from someone when it came back.

i remember watching my very first game on the bus to work. i think i must’ve missed the first day of games, i think it must’ve been a Tuesday, because i caught the bus at like 7am and i remember seasons not starting until 8am on Mondays. i watched the Garages play the Crabs (Garages lost). i remember falling in love with Avila Guzman and Allison Abbott and Malik Destiny (pre-catboyification!) based on nothing but vibes because i didn’t know anything about blaseball lore, i didn’t even know blaseball HAD lore. i think i found the Discord later that day, and i remember the Avila-Farrell feedback happening right around the time i joined the Discord.

i got my best friend into it at the same time and it turned into a hyperfixation for both of us. i remember sitting in their living room watching the finals for s4 while our partners sat by slightly befuddled by this thing that had suddenly taken over our lives.

i moved a couple hours away for grad school at the beginning of Sept 2020 and it was possibly the most miserable time of my life. i was lucky enough to be with family at least, but i was away from my now-husband and because of COVID everything was online and i am NOT a person who does well with online courses - when i had applied in fall of 2019 i had obviously assumed everything would be in-person. i had multiple meltdowns the first few months and blaseball was often the only bright spot.

the Jaylen necromancy, oh man. i remember when i first started looking up our lore and went “i missed out on a player named Jaylen Hotdogfingers????” she loomed so large over the Garages those first few seasons. her death kind of set the tone for us, especially as we kept losing players - every team wanted to fight the gods, but it felt so viscerally PERSONAL. and then one day i opened the website and saw her on the idol board with the little flaming skull next to her name.

i cannot even begin to describe the chaos i walked into when i opened the Discord and went to the Garages channel. it was just something you had to be there for. i was IMMEDIATELY team necromancy, because what was blaseball all about if not slamming big red buttons? and i figured if we didn’t, someone else would, so it might as well be us. a lot of folks felt the same. some didn’t. my mom called me at one point and asked me why i was talking about necromancy on Twitter. the Garages, obviously, decided to go for it. we had to try.

and at the same time, the Garages, somehow, were finally becoming a decent team. we made the playoffs for the first time in season 6. Jaylen’s final words, as per lore, were “we’ve just gotta make it to the playoffs.” we swept the Pies and Tigers - both former 2 time champions - to get to the finals. Mike Townsend, he who lived always in Jaylen’s shadow, threw out the first pitch of the first game of the finals. the Crabs swept us but we didn’t care. we had made it to the playoffs. we could do ANYTHING. we could bring our star pitcher back. and we did.

god, i’m just telling stories now, but to be fair blaseball is nothing BUT stories. i remember i spent a lot of that weekend in bed sleeping and crying because i was so depressed, but i pulled myself out of it enough to watch the election results roll in. to see Jaylen come home. to see Mike truly relegated to Jaylen’s shadow.

on Ruby Tuesday i was busy trying to unpack my room with my mom’s help. i took a break to check in on blaseball. games weren’t running even though they should’ve been. i scrolled through the game feed until i hit the Tigers-Moist Talkers game and realized just what we’d done, what Jaylen’s debt truly meant.

i didn’t always remember to watch the playoffs if the Garages weren’t in them, but i was watching when the Shoe Thieves reverse-swept the Crabs and were launched into a boss battle. Jaylen pitching against the puppets of a God. (the results of the Snackrifice.)

i cried when Jaylen went back to the Hall, even though i was sure her story wasn’t done. (and it wasn’t.)

the s11 finals between the Beams and Garages was one of the most emotionally draining things i’ve ever been through. we KNEW the Beams had us beat but the Sun 2/Black Hole shenanigans kept us holding on. i cried when we finally lost. and then the Keepers opened up the eternal concert in the Discord, and for hours there were hundreds of us packed in there, listening to Garages songs that sounded like you were hearing them played at a dive bar down the street because the quality was so bad and “singing” along, and eventually Get Normal came up, and everyone had been waiting for it, and. i don’t know. god, i cried so much. something about that moment of connection. something about the closest to a concert i’d experienced in a year. something about knowing it was the literal end of an era.

i don’t even know where to start with expansion. yeah it was an exhausting mess. my hyperfixation fucking LOVED it. i may have to do an expansion era retrospective/ramble separately because this is already too damn long, and expansion was SO much. for now i’ll just say that i will carry the way the Garages handled the final season of expansion with me for the rest of my life. it was so… poignant. watching us cling to our philosophy of “the Garage is always open” even though we KNEW we were inviting our own potential destruction through the door. choosing containment because we refused to save ourselves at the expense of the league but we could at least make sure the damage started and ended with us. making a beeline for the Hall because at the end of it we just wanted to go see our friends one more time.

i’ve mentioned this before, but when we melted the Coin i was at a minor league baseball game. it was the first game i had been to in probably four or five years and it was the first time i can remember actively CARING about baseball as an adult. i work for that minor league team now and i absolutely would not be doing that if not for blaseball.

god. i’m so, so sad. i will miss blaseball for the rest of my life. what a weird little piece of the internet i was blessed to partake in.

[peach-the-owl]

A request by the always wonderful @sirkekselord: For Artagan: Basically a sequel to the other one: The kid has loosened up more around him and starts to enjoy letting chaos into their life but you know, still has their serious moments. And when Artagan suddenly goes missing for a few days the kid thinks he abandoned her not knowing he got into a tricky situation he couldn't get out of. Maybe some old foe? Or the Moonweaver? Who knows! And then he comes back and apologizes.

My goodness this was back during NPC month and I still hadn’t finished it. I feel so ashamed *continues to be dramatic* At least it’s finally done now 😅

A God Or A Fraud?

Artagan & Child!Warlock!Reader

It’s been a few months since you became a fully fledged warlock to your archfey friend and life was never a dull moment. Having started to embrace the idea of letting loose and causing chaos towards others was a lot easier then you thought. Sure you played nice and had to keep up the mature attitude, you did still have to survive after all, but taking the time to let out your more childish side was a nice break from all that. Now here you lay on a shops roof hiding from some guards, granted they were looking for you but at the time you didn’t look like yourself so they wouldn’t even recognize you as you were now, but you were tired and wanted to take this moment to relax. After a while you sense a second presents join in next to you, through you don’t have to look over to know who it is.

“How’s everything going?” You ask casually. Finally looking over you don’t even bother to hold back your chuckle seeing the archfey dressed completely in guards attire. “You do know that even the guards here barely wear their helmets, right?” You snort out.

“So it would seem…” Artagan trails off displeased, immediately taking off said helmet with a look of disgust before waving his hand and changing into what you were more accustomed to seeing him wear. “That feels much better.” He sighs in relief.

“That’s nice. Now back to my question.” You look up at him waiting, he just stares back with a raised eyebrow making you roll your eyes. “Seriously, you already forgot? You’ve told me a lot about this cult thing you’ve got going on and I was curious how everything was going.”

“Ah! Yes… that.” Artagan perks up a bit. “I mentioned how it’s getting a little out of hand, yes?” He asks, you nod and wait for him to continue. “Well I’ve thought up a solution so that I no longer have to worry about making personal visits to each and every follower when they ask for something.” Being as dramatic a ever, he takes a long pause to build up the anticipation. “I’ve decided… to fake my ascension.” He places his hands on his hips with pride, as if this was the most foolproof plan ever concocted.

“Somehow I’m not surprised.” You say with a straight face.

“Oh come now. At least pretend you’re showing interest.”

“But if I did it’d be giving you what you want, and we both know I would never do that.” You joke, earning a soft shove from him making you giggle. “So how do you plan on achieving this?”

“I told you about my favourite before, right?” You rack your brain, trying to remember what Artagan’s all told you about.

“Ah yes, your star pupil and my ‘opposite’ or whatever. What was her name… Jester, I think.” He nods in affirmation. “So what? Did you tell her you were going to ascend and needed her help to achieve it?”

“Not exactly…” He trails off a second. “I finally revealed my true self to her and it’s more like she helped me come up with a plan to fake ascension. In fact her group has already set off to put the plan into action.”

“Wow. Even after learning you’re not a real god she’s still helping you. That’s actually kinda sweet.” You say genuinely shocked.

“Yes, I suppose so…” He trails off again, this wasn’t normal behaviour from the fey so you were getting a bit suspicious.

“Alright, what’s wrong?” Deciding not to beat around the bush, knowing it’d get you nowhere, you get right to the point.

“What do you mean?”

“Don’t play dumb with me mister! You’re acting all hesitant and cautious. That’s not something you normally do, that’s usually my job.” You state matter-of-factly. There’s a small pause between the you two.

“Heh, to think I’d be confiding in a child.” Artagan mutters while giving a light chuckle. “Here’s the thing, I’ve chosen this specific location so that even if things went sour it could be used as a backup plan. However it is… just a tad risky.”

“Knowing you that means it’s extremely risky.”

“Well… I mean…” Artagan fumbles over his words a bit. “I know Jester and her friends can handle themselves just fine. They’ve been through plenty of hard struggles before.” He concludes.

“If you say so.” You sigh. You decide to finally change topics and talk about what you’d been up to and all the little bits of mischief you’ve been causing. It’s well past sunset by now, you having long since left the rooftops, setting up camp a little ways outside the city and preparing for the next day.

A week had passed since your conversation with Artagan and not much was different at first, Artagan would pop in for a time each day and fill you in on all the juicy gossip and some details about this Traveler Con that’ll be happening soon while you told him all about what you’ve been up to. Then he only showed up every other day saying things were getting a bit more complicated then he’d like, mentioning someplace called Rumblecusp. Then out of the blue he stopped showing up altogether, no explanation, no quick goodbye, just nothing. At first you didn’t mind, having some time for yourself was nice but the longer he didn’t appear the more concerned you started to feel. He’d mentioned many times how he wanted to cut ties with his followers so he could go back to doing more of what he pleased again, it made you wonder if that included yourself too. The only hope you still had that he hadn’t completely abandoned you was the fact you still had your Warlock abilities, surely that had to mean something, right?

More time came and went and still no word or sigh from you fey friend, it disheartening honestly, after finally allowing yourself to open up more to someone else they up and disappear without a trace. You tried to get his attention by causing some major chaos to some poor unsuspecting villagers, using illusion spells to make it look like a dragon was circling the city, swooping down and scaring the locals. It was entertaining, but in the long run didn’t really achieve much, not to mention it was exhausting using such powerful magic. You sigh as you sit yourself down at a nearby lake to rest, staring up at the moon, which looked oddly bigger and brighter then usual tonight but still really pretty. Letting your thoughts wander back to when you first met Artagan, how much of a nuisance he used to be, well he still was but you were able to tolerate it much more now. All this reminiscing makes you realize just how boring your life used to be, you used to just go about your days solely to survive but once Artagan showed up and taught you how to be a kid again you weren’t just surviving anymore, you were living, having fun and actually enjoying yourself. You didn’t notice you were curling in on yourself and crying until your vision started going blurry from tears, doing your best to try wiping them away.

“There there. Come now, there’s really no need for such sour tears.” The sudden voice followed by a cloth helping dab some tears away makes you back. Looking up at a set of familiar, shining green eyes and fiery hair. “Ha, you should see yourself, you look like you’ve seen- oof!” Now Artagan was the one left in shock when you suddenly spring up from the ground and hug him. Eventually he does hug you back, albeit a bit awkwardly, still confused about what was happening.

“I thought you left me.” You mutter, when he doesn’t respond you continue. “You said wanted to cut ties with your followers so you wouldn’t have to show up all the time, that’s what that whole Traveler Con talk was about, right? So when you stopped showing up I thought you meant me too.”

“Oh…” It comes out so softly you could almost mistake it as him simply taking a breath. “I uhh, heh… you see things got complicated and…” It sounded like he was trying to bring up the mood, but with how his grip tightened around you… “I would never abandon you.” It startles you how serious he suddenly sounded. “I don’t give the title of favourites to just anyone, Jester is a wonderfully devious friend to have. While you brought a sort of grounding I didn’t realize I needed. Funny isn’t it, the adult brings the carefree nature, while the child plays the voice of reason.” It goes silent between you both, but it’s a comforting silence.

“So why-why were you gone so long?” You finally manage to ask.

“Ahh, that. Yes, well if could imagine, I may have overstepped my boundaries by pretending to be the Moonweaver and she wasn’t happy about that…” He explains with an awkward chuckle.

“Somehow, I’m not surprised.” You say with a small giggle.

“Are you kidding me! It’s was the Moonweaver herself! How can you not be surprised by that!” He asks exasperated, finally stepping away from you.

“Because it’s you, and you always find a way to annoy someone.” You poke fun at him. He takes another step back with a overly dramatic look of shock. “Geez, for someone who doesn’t like the theatre, you sure love the drama.”

“Don’t get me started! If I’d known this is what I’d be greeted to when I made my glorious return I would’ve stayed away.” He pouts. Yup, still being a drama queen. You get a good laugh out of it though.

“Well if that’s the case then I guess I won’t tell you how I fooled a whole village into thinking a dragon was nesting nearby.” You huff lightheartedly, pretending to march away.

“No wait, I want to know. Tell me.” Artagan follows after you. For the rest of the night you both share stories of what the other had missed in your time apart.

Bonus:

“Hey Artagan, I’m curious about something.”

“Oh? Care to inquire about some new tricks or perhaps refine older ones?”

“No, I was just wondering, how would you react if I ever met Jester for myself?”

“…”

“…”

“I… I don’t know.”

“Alright, good talk.”

“Wait, why?”

“Goodnight.”

“No! You can’t just ask me that and then leave it!”

“…”

“(Y/n).”

“…”

“Oh come on! No one falls asleep that fast!”

[elflock-magician]

"Judgemental Stare"

Summary - Susie and Noelle become a Reddit meme.

Susie and Noelle had happily been girlfriends for a few months now. They hung out at school, ate lunch together, and spend every day with each other. Sunday was basically official movie night, and Tuesday was shopping together. And Saturday's were Darkworld visits. But today, Susie and Noelle weren't doing anything. So they decided to go and visit Rudy, Noelle's father. Susie and Rudy seemed to like each other. Noelle remembered when they first met, her father inexplicably gave Susie two thumbs up and an approving smile, Susie was a little confused but went along with it. Rudy was like a father to Susie. And today, they visited again. Kris was there too, they were playing a soft song on the piano. They were pretty good at it. The music echoed through the hospital. "Dad! We're here!" Noelle called happily as she quickly ran and hugged her father. Susie was calmly walking behind, but had a giddy smile. "Hey honey, oh, and hello to you too Susie!" Rudy said with a smile. Susie took her hand out of her pocket and waved back, "Yo." She said simply. "How's your twos been?" Rudy asked, his sentence short. "We've been good! Grades have been good. Oh, and Berdly says 'hi'!" Noelle said with zeal and happy enthusiasm. She put her hands on her hips while smiling. "Berdly...eh, I never liked that kid." Rudy said simply. "He's a little obnoxious, sure, but we've been friends for a while now. He means well." Noelle said and sat down on part of the bed next to her father.

"He always weirds me out." Susie interjected, leaning against a wall. "Hm, well, Anyways! How have you been?" Noelle asked her father. "Me? Ah, same old, same old. You know how it is." Rudy explained, avoiding details. "Kris has been visiting often, but that piano music is putting me to sleep." Rudy said jokingly. "Really?" Susie muttered. "I think the piano music is calming." Noelle said. Then Susie suddenly started beatboxing. "S-Susie?!" Noelle called out in surprise. "Haha! That's more like it." Rudy responded. Susie continued beatboxing while Noelle watched her girlfriend in confusion. After what was going on finally settled, decided to take out her phone.

Noelle took a selfie because it was kind of funny. Her dad was smiling and clapping mildly while Susie beatboxed her heart out, and Noelle just stared into the camera with a dead facial expression. She captioned the photo with,

"This is what I deal with every day" and she posted it on the Overnet. And that was that, she didn't think that the picture would get popular the way it did. But for the moment, she just enjoyed the company of her father and her girlfriend.

Susie eventually tired of beatboxing. "You know, my nurse was telling me about a new movie. 'Attack of the Killer Queen' was it? Two for one deal tonight." Rudy brought up with a few shaky hand gestures. "I thought it was Attack of the Giant Killer Rat?" Susie questioned. "Oh! Maybe we should go see it?" Noelle answered.

"Eh, if you want. I'm down for whatever." Susie replied and put her arm around Noelle. "Sure! Is that okay with you, Dad?" Noelle asked. "Visiting hours are almost over anyways. You two kiddos have fun." Rudy replied. And so, they left for the movie. The post she had made on Overnet didn't even cross her mind once. The movie was actually titled 'Attack of the Giant Killer Queen Rat.' The movie sucked, but Noelle and Susie were just happy to spend some time together. They spent the movie cuddling and cracking jokes at the movie.

"All right, sleep well, Noelle." Susie said as she walked Noelle to the front gate of her house. "Thanks Susie! And you too." She replied. "I love you." She added, she still got flustered whenever she said it. Susie smiled in response. "Love you too, Elle." Susie replied before giving Noelle a soft kiss on the cheek, and then leaving.

Noelle went inside the warm embrace of her house. The next day, when Noelle and Susie walked to school, Berdly was waiting for them at the door with Kris, who was staring into the abyss, as usual. "SUSIE, NOELLE, you must come and see this!" Berdly called, his phone out in front of him. Berdly sprinted towards the couple. "What's got your feathers in a twist?" Susie asked, taking a step back. "You two have gone viral!" Berdly shouted and shoved his phone into Noelle's face. "Huh?" Noelle muttered and took the phone from Berdly. "Berdly, what is all this?" Noelle questioned as she scrolled through the images. "Why do you have an active iFunny account? And I just thought you couldn't be more of a nerd." Susie spat as she looked over Noelles shoulder.

"Wait is that us?" Susie questioned.

The photo was a meme template, it had captions like 'me' and 'my friends' on it, like the classic Dank Meme stuff you'd find on Reddit. And it was the picture that Noelle had taken of Susie and her father yesterday.

Noelle was dead-faced, Susie was just confused and Berdly looked like he was having his fifth heart attack of the day. "You've become a meme format!" Berdly shouted. He seemed excited about it, happy for them, even. "Let me see that!" Susie shouted and snatched the phone from Noelle. She scrolled for a few seconds before saying, "Damn, and none of them are funny." With a small frown.

"Oh gosh! I'm so sorry Susie! I didn't mean to—" Noelle called out in fear of making Susie upset with her. "Woah, calm down Noelle, it's fine, I don't care. Besides, I look pretty badass in this picture." Susie replied and put her arm around Noelle, which she had found makes Noelle feel comfortable and safe. "Are you sure?" She questioned. "Of course." Susie replied.

From that point forward Susie had been recognized as the 'beatboxing lizard girl' and Noelle as 'idk the deer.' Alphys, their teacher, was a frequent user of the internet and practically chocked on air upon seeing two of her students become a popular meme. So, life continued as normal. But now Noelle and Susie were internet famous and considered a Reddit meme.

...yaaaay.