#so basically mobei-want was helpful but not very much needed

[wildrosesayshigh3]

I just had another og Shang Qinghua thought and I am once again making it everyone else's problem. 😁 Your welcome.

How bad was An Ding peak and Cang Qiong in general for the Orginal Shang Qinghua to look at the demon who just killed his Martial Siblings and go yep I’ll serve you go life and not dip when he feel unconscious. Like what?!

Not much is known about og Shang Qinghua’s morals but I imagine he would t be that much different from a regular person in the cultivation world…. So someone with a looser set of morals to ours but not by much.

So how bad was a ding peak were someone as ambitious and self persevering as og Shang Qinghua decides to throw his lot in the demon who killed his sect siblings so quickly?

Don’t get me wrong he was probably very ambitious and rising up to the ranks of An Ding would have taken longer but I don’t think by much.

[nibbelraz]

SQH + An Ding Idea

-An Ding runs similar to a sort of college campus, everyone writes about An Ding basically doing everything for the whole peak.

(Architecture, Accounting, Business, Operations, Textiles, etc. etc.)

There's no way every disciple can learn all of the things An Ding does, and be able to perform them to a high quality.

So, perhaps SQH is the one who starts it because he realizes how kind of fucked the An Ding mechanics are. (Or system helped out, or possibly SQH god powers because that little guy is real busy and instituting all of these plans would take a whole long time)

But An Ding ends up running like some sort of campus, with a bunch of disciples specializing in different areas. Younger disciples take all of the essential classes, and then pick one or multiple areas of study/specialization. And they get real good at them, because specialization and not covering a million jobs at once means quality goes up. And I think SQH would just take in kids at the masses, just gathering up pretty much any kid with no place to go even if they have no real cultivation potential. Because running An Ding means they need a large number of disciples. He has a recruiting system or something, so there's a little girl in the street who fashioned her rags into a slightly cuter skirt. And an An Ding person is like 'hey, you like fashion? Textiles? You can do that for as long as you want if you join An Ding.' room, board, safety all for people who enjoy these sorts of trades to be able to specialize them and produce all the things the sects need. Street kids who are good with numbers or good with carpentry get taken into An Ding, no cultivation potential needed just kids who have passions but no way to enjoy them in their current situations.

This would also mean so much less outsourcing for the peak, much easier to work in house if it can be set up correctly.

Do the An Ding kids still get pushed around and shit on by other peaks, yeah for sure none of those peaks ever appreciate all the work An Ding does. But these kids are fine anyways because as soon as they get back on An Ding their solid, their doing what they enjoy and what they're good at. Who cares if some buff bai zhan kid teases them for being An Ding, they get to go to woodshop after this and the hall master is teaching embellishments and decor carving!

(one of the req. Classes would be a year long 'how to deal with Bai Zhan' training)

OH MAN OHHHH MAN I LOVE THIS IDEA SO MUCH??? OHHHHH THIS IS GOOD YES YES A THOUSAND PERCENT

Qinghua running the peak that has each category to specialize in is great. They handle literally everything for course they need more man power and of COURSE THEY NEED PEOPLE TO LEARN SOME THINGS THAT ARE VERY SPECIFIC INSTEAD OF A THOUSAND THINGS AT ONCE ohhh OH I love the does that he takes in just anyone

I wonder if he takes in whoever doesn't make it from the other peaks. "Trust me you don't want to be at Bai Zhan peak. You actually get to do what you like here" also I feel like there has to be a group that does the heavy lifting from all the stuff they get so there IS a group that are ready to fight anyone who picks on the other An Ding kids

This means An Ding must have the most disciples of course its HUGE, imagine if he doesn't tell the other peak lords

He's just like "fuck it what are they going to do? Tell me I can't when efficiency has SKYROCKETED AFTER MY SYSTEM!"

Yes YES i would read a fic with this premise so FAST I absolutely love this idea

Wonder what the whole "campus" of kids think when Mobei Jun starts popping in randomly

[i-will-cry-you-a-river]

Yandere Bingyuan in this house? It's more likely than you think!

Luo Binghe would like to say that he was perfectly normal, thank you very much. He was sooo normal about everything; he breathed the polluted air in Beijing just like everybody else. He worked tirelessly, like the good, normal nurse he was, just like any other good healthcare workers did. He cooked for himself, and ate whenever he had time, just like other workaholics did. His heart beat, pumping his blood everywhere in his body, his muscles carried him to places, his brain focused on the important things. He was just like anybody else.

No matter what Mobei-jun thought, or how he judged him with those icy eyes.

He, Luo Binghe, was just a normal person, with normal hobbies and normal feelings.

Feelings that bloomed so unexpectedly, so gradually that he wasn't prepared for them, but… well. Nobody could ever be prepared for Shen Yuan. He was just so bright and kind, so full of life and opinions! It started as nothing but a subtle curiosity towards the patient the other nurses just called “The Regular”. It was nothing serious - until it was, within the first two minutes of their meeting.

He was immediately charmed by the kind, cute little chronically ill patient, seven years his senior. He was just so- there was something about him that attracted Luo Binghe like a moth to a flame. His movements, his gestures were always so graceful, his smiles so kind, and his headpats addictive. Luo Binghe had been immediately hooked.

It was quite easy to befriend with his ‘Yuan-ge’, as Shen Yuan agreed to be called. He spend as much time as he could while he was in hospital, and when he was discharged, they kept up their friendship. It was nice to help out. It was nice to be needed. A freshly baked breakfast here, a careful hand to take care of a new injury there…

It was nice.

It was nowhere near enough.

Luo Binghe didn't just want to be needed. He wanted to be the only person Shen Yuan had; the only person who could care for him, who could see him, who could speak to him. It was even easier to become Shen Yuan’s personal nurse. First, at the hospital, then, when he insisted it would be better for Shen Yuan's mental health to stay home with a live-in nurse, at home.

He never really had a place to call home. Shen Yuan's place quickly became that.

Within a day, they fell into an easy routine, as if they were an old married couple.

Every morning, Luo Binghe would wake up an hour early than Shen Yuan to make him a healthy breakfast and make sure that everything was spotless and perfect for his little patient. Then, after waking up, he would check his vitals, measure the blood pressure, examine if everything worked just like they should, if everything reacted perfectly to each stimulus. (They always did. Those perfect little cherry blossom colored nipples were always so hard within seconds. The skin under his hands also became a lovely red color after a little bit of pressure. Luo Binghe adored how reactive his patient's body was.)

Then, breakfast together, some work next to each other on the couch, lunch and a movie or just reading next to each other. Everything was so domestic.

Especially bath time.

Shen Yuan couldn't bathe alone because of his dizzy spells, so Luo Binghe spent each one of his nights barely holding himself together while carefully washing Shen Yuan's back with his Legend of Zelda sponge. It was maddening!

How lovely Shen Yuan was. How trusting and perfect… It made Luo Binghe want to consume him. To own him. To have him at his utter mercy.

And soon, it was time to get him completely.

Except.

Huh.

Luo Binghe stared blankly at the wall of the wardrobe he never really had to touch before. It seemed it had a reason why Shen Yuan never used it when Luo Binghe was in his room. The wardrobe…

“Surprised?” Came the amused voice behind him. He didn't turn around. His eyes were locked on the wardrobe that was basically a shrine dedicated to him.

Walls adorned with pictures of him (was that his graduation ceremony?), soft sketches detailed every inch of his body, similarly thick journals as he had at his apartment about Yuan-ge filled with notes about his preferences, friends, likes and dislikes, and his movements.

Luo Binghe stared in disbelief-

-and relief.

“You were so cute when you tried so hard to become my private nurse. As if I didn't already plan that even before you received the job offer from the director,” Yuan-ge said with a knowing smile on his lips. His presence was intoxicating.

“The job offer? Wait, so… it was you? You planned this? You… knew?” Luo Binghe stammered, staring at Shen Yuan with stars in his eyes.

His Yuan-ge stepped closer, his gaze never leaving Luo Binghe's eyes. “I planned everything,” he admitted, his smile widening. It should have been chilling.

It was fucking addictive.

“You weren't the only one watching. Or manipulating. People tend to overlook me because of my illness, so it makes everything so much easier. Like making sure you could graduate even if you almost went on a blind date who was unfortunately the brother of the vice dean, who hated your guts and was looking for the tiniest reason to get you out of the program.”

Luo Binghe was speechless. The thought of Shen Jiu always made his blood boil, and he tried so hard to forget that pathetic man's existence, but.

Oh, wow.

To think that all this time they could have been together…

He wondered if Shen Yuan would mourn his brother if he would be notified of his unfortunate passing.

“No murder in my family. It was enough to make all the clues disappear after your cousin's death. You are quite a messy puppy, aren't you?”

Luo Binghe felt the world tilt, his carefully constructed reality fracturing. “You… Yuan-ge…” His eyes stung by the withheld tears. “Why?”

“Because,” Shen Yuan said, reaching out to pat Luo Binghe's bouncy curls on the top of his head. “We are the same, the two sides of the same coin. Because your obsession matches mine, your mental illness fits mine perfectly. Because you are cute, because I want to ravish you and own you and be ravished by you and be owned by you. Because we belong together.”

It felt true. It felt right.

It felt exhilarating that the one person he'd ever wanted was just like him. They were one soul stuck in two bodies.

He thought it was enough to just own Shen Yuan, to have him at his mercy. But this? This was so much better!

Taking Shen Yuan's hand, he laced their fingers together. “You are so perfect, Yuan-ge,” he said, his voice a mix of awe and reverence.

“We are perfect, for each other,” Shen Yuan corrected, his eyes gleaming with the same maniacal intensity that mirrored Luo Binghe's. The smaller man grinned wolfishly, and pulled Luo Binghe closer, their bodies flushing together as they both wanted for so long.

“Now kiss me, puppy!” Yuan-ge ordered, and Luo Binghe had never been more eager to comply.

[tossawary]

It’s also funny that Shen Yuan implied becoming peak lord was easy with the help of demons, instead of SQH just sabotaging the other disciples

They're both such unreliable narrators that you can introduce basically any reality you want, but it's true that the Airplane Extras make so much of the main story hilarious in hindsight. It generally reads to me that Shang Qinghua is honestly good at his job. It is super funny to think that maybe the original goods needed to assassinate people to get ahead in PIDW, but Airplane Bro is probably college-educated possibly in a relevant field and apparently working hard enough that he accidentally skipped the need for murder.

Cucumberplane get in an argument about something and Shen Yuan goes, "Big words from someone who killed 33 people to become the peak lord!" (He remembers the exact line from PIDW, even!) And Shang Qinghua goes, "I did what now?"

Because, like, between the deaths of his fellow disiciple when meeting Mobei-Jun and all the deaths he's partially responsible for at the Immortal Alliance Conference, his hands aren't clean! Though he's kept it to accomplice levels! It's very alarming to be suddenly accused of additional murder he doesn't actually remember committing. Big "oh shit, my king, what did you do now???" moment.

[shioritsumi]

Mo Tuxuan is a character I haven't figured out as much on, but I have decided him literally being Mobei-jun reincarnated is funny so i'm rolling with it.

He was set up in a cold and distant home to be reborn in, professional, educated, powerful....kind of like being the royal family, but not quite. He was basically predestined to be the head of North Kingdom industries from the start and his entire life has been rearranged to that end. He's a little disappointed, his second life is almost the same as his first...but he's not technically royalty, and he's not a demon. Very little else has changed.

And then he's at a meeting with the CEO of another company and he encounters an account manager by the name of Shang Qingshui who seems off put by him but not....scared. Well, yes, scared, but not in the feeble sheep-like way most office workers are. He's carried his demon king aura and attitude with him, and it intimidates almost everyone he encounters. Qingshui immediately recognizes the aura and bristles bc there's NO WAY Mobei-jun is here, he CAN'T be this unlucky he'll just do his job and get out of the CEO's hair and maybe if he stonewalls the man he won't try to pull him back in.

Except Mo Tuxuan is so amazed there's a human who can stand up to him and casually disregard him he's actually kind of obsessed now. He needs to talk to that man more. He looks at Tuxuan like he's a WORM. No one else does that, no one else even dares to look at him like that. Everyone else looks up at him and cowers, Shang Qingshui looks up at him and narrows his eyes and digs in his heels.

Meanwhile on Qingshui's end, after his very first interaction with the man he sincerely hopes is not actually Mobei-jun because if he was that would be really fucked up right, he receives a message from the System announcing that he's just gained 1000 B Points! Quest line unlocked- North Kingdom Industries! What even, how did this happen. He was hoping being rude would make him not want to interact with him ever again. Instead, every time he does business with their company he insists that he be assisted by Shang Qingshui.

"Are you sure, sir? He's...just an accounts manager, not an assistant or anything." "Which accounts does he handle?" ".....payroll...." "I am interested in acquiring accounts from your company, I'll need to see how the payroll will function. I will require his help."

Shen Tianyu watching the whole thing playing out: "I think he's smitten with you something fierce. Remember how I looked back when Lianhua started coming around back in college?" "Or how Binghe looks at you...all the time?" "Yeah. That's how he looks at you." "....I am actively trying to bully him into leaving me alone." "I guess that's his kink." "Gross." "You're into it, though, I know you are."

Meanwhile Mo Tuxuan doesn't know why he can't stop thinking about the tiny human manager who reminds him a little of someone he knew in his previous life and who takes charge over him and is a wizard with paperwork and accounts payable and every part of him absolutely fills him with desire. The fact that they're both clearly aware how easily he could crush Qingshui and the fact that Qingshui still pushes back against him just makes Tuxuan's crush worse. He finds Shang Qingshui pathetic, not in a sad hamster way like Airplane, but in the epic boyfail way that he acts like he's hardcore and makes way too many unnecessary risks while trying to make himself seem unlikable and accidentally making himself into the cold-blooded rebel punk instead. It's even worse since Qingshui is educated and experienced enough by now that he should totally know better.

New Moshang after the identity reveal like "You killed me!" "And you killed me....." Shang Qingshui just sort of gives him a light backhand "don't say that in such a reverent tone like it's a marriage proposal, sir" But the blush increases bc that backtalk just makes Qingshui HOTTER.

[dragoncharming]

su xiyan lives au

doesn’t change much from shen qingqiu’s perspective until the immortal conference

su xiyan slips unconscious after ensuring luo binghe is safely away on his lil boat. she doesn’t die since the cold slows her heart rate enough, but she’s out of commission long enough to lose track of lbh. with keeping under the radar of haun hua palace and canvassing the whole riverbank, eventually she finds the fisherman who found him but they sent him off with a merchant who has a sister who wants a kid but by then he’s long gone. since she knows he’s safe, she realizes this is more of a marathon than a sprint and decides to get backup.

it’s hard not to hear the story of the entire cultivation world uniting against a horrific demon lord, so it’s very clear to her that she has very few options. she finds tianlang-jun after he’s been imprisoned for only about six months. the impression i get of su xiyan is that she’s not going to tell him everything at once, so it’s a while into the process of her getting him out that it even comes up that she was poisoned.

there are two ways she could get him out. 1) she spends months slowly unraveling the layers and layers keeping him imprisoned. maybe she trusts wu chen enough to ask for some advice. 2) she’s v familiar w bai lu and knows about the mushroom and grows both of them new bodies to give them new faces which also helps w the longer campaign. i think regardless of how she gets tianlang-jun out, we might as well say she makes herself a new face so she can operate.

to keep him distracted during this whole process, su xiyan asks tianlang-jun to start working on a piece of her longer plan: a romantic epic of their story w the serial numbers filed off. she needs to start seeding the downfall of the palace master and the tragedy of a beautiful princess who was lured away as her noble father set a trap for the man she loved. i have this image of tianlang-jun reciting his latest version and su xiyan edits a couple words while she’s directing zhuzhi-lang ‘just another step to the left. perfect.’

next step is starting her own sect. this lets her recruit people to her cause, siphon potential disciples from huan hua palace, travel around looking for promising young kids around the age lbh would be now. we know she doesn’t find him, but she definitely poaches gongyi xiao. (and if i am personally delighted by him being zhuzhi-lang’s shidi, that’s just a little treat for me.)

the first hint that sqq has that something is weird is around the immortal conference when he’s expecting to find gongyi xiao listed for huan hua palace, but instead it’s some podunk sect he’s never heard of. huan hua palace is still hosting the conference, but there’s a tone of them compensating. over a decade of sustained whisper campaigns has done damage to their reputation and they’re trying to cover by being generous~. what sqq does notice but doesn’t give any thought to is that small sect leader staring when she sees lbh. ofc. he’s the protagonist, every woman stares at him.

zhuzhi-lang still coordinates w mobei-jun to attack the conference to lure all the elders in, but su xiyan doesn’t harbor grudges against the young disciples so the monsters they bring in are specifically shock and awe that aren’t immediately lethal, creatures that trap and knock out people as well as large scary but slow creatures and her disciples protect the people too inexperienced to survive that basic threat while helping scare them more thoroughly to lure the seniors in.

this leads to a confrontation with the palace master. they’re surrounded by a crowd and in the midst of this as he’s turning around, making his case to the community at large he spots lbh, clearly now it’s not thru the crystals, and figures out who he is and tries to attack him. not sure on the specifics, but it ends up with lbh falling into the abyss and su xiyan shouting over her shoulder ‘i want his head myself when we get back!’ and jumping after him. tianlang-jun grabs palace master’s throat. ‘you heard my wife. there can’t be any doubt now about how he attacked an innocent boy. you all saw it yourself.’

shen qingqiu is So Confused. he has been mentally preparing to do something awful, going over the steps of the conference over and over in his mind and everything suddenly slipped out from under his feet. the system dings but doesn’t say anything for a second, as if it’s also confused, and that shakes him out of it. ‘No! he ended up in the abyss! that’s what the task was. you didn’t say i had to be the one who did it.’ which works.

[serotocin38]

TL;DWrite: How to Court a Dumb Human Bean

Mobei-Jun/Shang Qinghua

In which Shang Qinghua is kind of in love with Mobei-Jun, and misunderstands everything. You know, the typical situation. But this time, after a run-in with a strange demon girl, he’s also oblivious to the fact that he suddenly becomes incredibly attractive everyone else. And they all want him. 

2,420 words, oblivious SQH, slight pining, courting, misunderstandings, harem potential but no harem, only Moshang

High cheekbones – check. Sharp jawline – check. Piercing gaze – check. Broad shoulders – check. Ridiculous height – check. Graceful air – check. Firm and defined muscles – double check. Very powerful – check, check, and check.

Shang Qinghua sighed to himself, shaking his head ever so slightly as he reluctantly drew his gaze away from his king and went back to the pile of paperwork in front of him.

Mobei-Jun stood across the room, glaring at a group of elders who seemed to have finally cornered him and wanted to get their point across while Mobei-Jun was still willing to entertain them.

Shang Qinghua had no doubt it was to pester him about getting married again. Ever since Luo Binghe basically up and abandoned his newfound seat of power like it was the side chick he accidentally got pregnant, Mobei-Jun had taken over full-time, and as a result, Shang Qinghua found himself with a lot more paperwork to get through.

While he worked his way through several stacks a day, Shang Qinghua silently cursed Cucumber Bro for going into seclusion with his demon husband to live the life of domestic bliss while he was stuck with a desk job! And he did not even get paid for this!

The only plus side of the paperwork was that Shang Qinghua was situated across from Mobei-Jun most of the day, and he could sneak as many glances as his heart desires. And if Mobei-Jun caught him in the act, Shang Qinghua only had to tap his brush against his chin like he was thinking hard.

Take that, Cucumber Bro. You aren’t the only brilliant actor in this world!

“What’s wrong, my king?” Shang Qinghua asked when Mobei-Jun finally stormed away from the elders, and they were alone.

Mobei-Jun sat down on the throne of ice with an angry glower on his face. If it were directed at him, Shang Qinghua would be a blubbering mess of tears begging for his life. He felt a shiver run down his spine.

“Do you want to get married.”

Shang Qinghua blinked, wondering if he mishead. Then, his face flushed bright red. “My- My king? I- This- This servant couldn’t possibly be fit to marry you!”

The glower grew deeper, and now it was definitely directed at Shang Qinghua. “I meant, if you ever plan on getting married to anyone,” Mobei-Jun gritted out slowly.

Shang Qinghua was feeling faint now. Of course that was what Mobei-Jun meant! What the hell was he thinking?! He had obviously been daydreaming way too much!

“This servant wouldn’t dare!” Shang Qinghua squeaked. “My entire life is dedicated to serving my king and no one else!” He wondered if now would be a good time to get on his knees and start blubbering.

Mobei-Jun grunted and turned the glare away. “I don’t have a choice,” he said. “The elders think… that the potential candidates they chose do not interest me.”

Shang Qinghua wiped away his tears and sniffled a few times. “Do they not appeal to my king?”

“…Not interested.”

Shang Qinghua thought about the long list of demon girls from various prestigious bloodlines. “Perhaps my king’s taste is... of another gender?”

Mobei-Jun’s glare turned back to him again.

Shang Qinghua was so dead. He just asked the second most powerful demon in the world if he was gay!

He gulped, his hand trembling and dripping ink all over the page. He quickly set it down and put his hands into his lap to hide them. Mobei-Jun just studied him hard, then looked away again, saying nothing.

…so it was not a ‘no’.

Shang Qinghua cleared his throat. “Should- Should this servant let the elders know? I’m certain that there are many eligible demon males that are fit to be my king’s consort? I- I’ve heard that homosexuality is quite common among demons! I mean, Sha Hualing is-”

“Not. Interested.”

“Eh? But- But my king-” Shang Qinghua was at a loss. He almost threw his hands up in the air and tore at his hair while screaming, “THEN WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU INTO?”

He took a deep breath instead. “Perhaps my king is not interested in anything romantic or, ahem, sexual. In that case-”

“No.”

Shang Qinghua just stared blankly at him. After a few moments of silence, Mobei-Jun stared back at him.

“My king, is there anyone you’ve ever liked before? Anyone at all?”

There was a long silence. “…Yes.”

“Okay! Great!” Shang Qinghua said desperately. “What- What did they look like? Maybe we can find them again, or- or at least find someone fitting those descriptions!”

Mobei-Jun tilted his head to the side a bit, studying Shang Qinghua with narrowed eyes. “Small,” he said slowly. “Helpless. Like a baby bird.”

Shang Qinghua’s mouth opened and closed a few times. “Uh, okay. What- What color was their hair? Their eyes? Male, female? When did you last see them?”

Mobei-Jun’s lips thinned as he continued staring at Shang Qinghua. “I see them every day,” he said slowly.

Shang Qinghua felt his excitement dim slightly. Ah, so it was a current crush. Despite being by his king’s side on a daily basis, Shang Qinghua was not aware of this interest of his.

His smile wavered ever so slightly. “Do- Do they know you… feel this way towards them?”

Mobei-Jun’s eyes narrowed further, boring deep into Shang Qinghua’s soul. “…They’re not very perceptive,” he said gravely.

Despite the dull throbbing of his own heart, Shang Qinghua silently comforted Mobei-Jun. Unrequited love was not a good feeling.

“Then my king just needs to be more bold with his advances!” Shang Qinghua encouraged. “Maybe you just need to tell them you like them!”

Mobei-Jun considered it. “I… like you.”

Shang Qinghua nodded. “Just like that, my king!”

Mobei-Jun’s glare grew deeper. Then, he shook his head. “Doesn’t work.”

Shang Qinghua gave a nervous chuckle. “How would you know if you don’t try, my king? Maybe if you spend more time with them, they’ll eventually catch on.”

“More time?” Mobei-Jun asked under his breath.

“Oh, and helping them out would probably show that you care.”

Mobei-Jun nodded slowly. “I see,” he said. “This… will work?”

Shang Qinghua gave him a weak smile that he hoped was encouraging. “Unless your person is a rock, they’ll certainly realize it.”

“Okay,” Mobei-Jun said. “Then, do you… want me to help-”

“Ah!” Shang Qinghua gasped as an amulet around his neck started growing hot. He quickly pulled it out, the red stone glowing dully in his palm. “This servant is late, my king!” he said. “I need to go pick up your new cloak now!”

He gave a hurried bow before scrambling out of the room, the doors slamming shut behind him.

Mobei-Jun sighed in annoyance. “…He’s a rock.”

~~~

Shang Qinghua was running terribly late. He was supposed to go to a specialty shop to pick up a custom cloak of Mobei-Jun’s.

A few weeks ago, Mobei-Jun had dropped a huge monster in front of his desk, blood still spilling from the fresh wound and staining the furs that served as a carpet in his room.

“This is- This is a Frost Flower Tiger Seal?” Shang Qinghua gawked. “What- What does my king want me to do with it this time?” he asked.

Mobei-Jun had recently taken up the habit of hunting rare demonic monsters with pelts that could sell for a fortune or two. And he never told Shang Qinghua what he wanted him to do with them, except he showed extreme offense to Shang Qinghua’s offer of selling them.

So he had no choice but to take the rare pelts and make them into rugs and coats and scarves.

The Fost Flower Tiger Seal’s slick pelt was extremely soft and completely waterproof. It was naturally a deep blue, with black streaks in it, like a tiger’s fur. So Shang Qinghua sent the pelt to a special clothing shop to have them customize a cloak for Mobei-Jun.

However, on the way, Shang Qinghua ran into a couple of demons who were in the process of dragging a poor human girl out of her hut.

“What a pretty little thing,” one of them leered. “Why don’t you come with us and keep us company?”

“Let me go!” she screamed, kicking and thrashing.

“Hey!” Shang Qinghua shouted, glad he brought his sword. It had been a while since he drew it, and he had never been particularly good at fighting in the first place, and he was definitely rusty. He just hoped the threat would scare away the demons.

The other demon sniggered. “Look, another tiny human,” he said. “Let’s take them both.”

Shang Qinghua swung his sword, the weight throwing him off a little bit. He quickly regained his balance, his heart thumping hard in his chest.

If he called out like last time, would Mobei-Jun show up?

Suddenly, both demons’ eyes were glued to Shang Qinghua’s sword. Then, with a mess of senseless apologies, they dropped the girl and ran off faster than Shang Qinghua could figure out what made them run.

It was only afterwards that Shang Qinghua remembered the tassel tied to the end of his sword with Mobei-Jun’s seal on it. Regardless, he gratefully sheathed his sword and rushed to the girl’s side.

“Hey, you really shouldn’t hang around here alone,” Shang Qinghua said, helping her up with a sigh.

The girl huffed. “I had it covered, you know,” she said. She reached into her sleeve and pulled out three needles, obviously coated with a deadly poison.

“Ah,” Shang Qinghua said.

“Thank you anyway,” she said. She looked him up and down. “What’s a human like you doing in the Demon Realm?”

“I could say the same for you.”

“Not human,” she said with a roll of her eyes. “And I’m a travelling merchant. Anyway, I suppose I should repay you somehow. What do you want?” she asked. “I’ve got strength potions, protection charms, cultivation enhancers.”

She seemed to have found all of Shang Qinghua’s weaknesses with just a glance. Each suggestion felt like a small stab at all his lacking points.

“Heh, no need,” Shang Qinghua said, remembering he was on a tight schedule. “I need to get going.”

The girl tilted her head to the side. “Where are you headed? I have a pill that can prolong your stamina. Most use it for sex purposes, but you can use it to travel too,” she said casually, ignoring the way Shang Qinghua coughed lightly.

“Just west,” he said vaguely. “I really should go.”

Finally, the girl sighed. “Fine, fine. I won’t keep you. Here, take some water, at least. You look like you could use it.”

She disappeared into her hut briefly and came back with a small bottle. “It’s a bottle of Replenishing Water,” she said. “As long as you’re thirsty, it will continue to produce water. And it doesn’t take up much space, so it’s perfect for travel.”

Shang Qinghua glanced at the sun. He took the bottle. “Much thanks,” he said quickly. He left before the girl could try pushing any more of her wares onto him.

The Replenishing Water did seem pretty useful though. Shang Qinghua took several sips from the tiny bottle, but every single time, more cool water poured from it. But if Shang Qinghua just tipped the bottle over dry ground, nothing came out.

He briefly wondered who that girl was exactly. But he did not think on it too much because he managed to catch the store just before closing.

“Wait!” he called as the store owner, an elderly demon lady came out to lock up.

“There you are!” she snapped, shoving the door open again.

Shang Qinghua followed her inside, apologizing over and over again for being so late. She grumbled as she went and grabbed the cloak, all wrapped up and boxed nicely. He reached for the money pouch in his robes when suddenly, the elderly demon lady grabbed his wrist.

“Come here,” she commanded.

“Eh?” Shang Qinghua was pulled downwards roughly. She stared at him with her old eyes. “Is- Is everything alright, Madame?”

Suddenly, the usually sour expression on her face softened. “I’ve never noticed before, but… you look like my late husband!”

“Wh-What? You- You have to be mistaken. Madame, I am merely a human servant for my king! How could I-”

“I’m not mistaken!” she exclaimed. “You look exactly like him!” Suddenly, she rushed forward, and Shang Qinghua stepped back, running out of the shop as quickly as he could. “Husband, come back! Your Gui-er has been waiting for you!”

Shang Qinghua did not look back. He ran for a few miles before he collapsed on the side of the road, absolutely exhausted. The sun had nearly set, and he was still a far way from the palace. He had really hoped he could avoid travelling by sword.

But before anything else, Shang Qinghua spent a few minutes chugging from the bottle of Replenishing Water. He felt much better after sitting for a bit and making sure the demon lady was not chasing him.

By then, it was completely dark and walking was no longer an option.

Still, Shang Qinghua was reluctant about riding his sword. He had not been confident about mounting his sword since rescuing Mobei-Jun and nearly killing both of them with his skills.

“Ah, my king,” Shang Qinghua sighed aloud.

“What is it?”

Shang Qinghua wished he could say he did not scream like a little girl and drop the box holding the new cloak.

“My- My king!” Shang Qinghua gasped, his heart doing a rapid staccato dance in his chest. “What- What are you doing here?”

“You called,” Mobei-Jun said sternly, like it explained everything.

“This- This servant was just heading back.”

“It’s late already,” Mobei-Jun said. He picked up the box and opened it. He took out the Frost Flower Tiger Seal cloak and inspected it.

“Does my king approve?” Shang Qinghua asked nervously.

Mobei-Jun rubbed the thick cloak between his fingers. “It’s good,” he rumbled. Then, he draped the heavy cloak over Shang Qinghua’s shoulders and clasped it in front.

“My- My king?”

“Let’s go,” Mobei-Jun said, pulling him in by his waist and opening a portal.

They reappeared in the throne room, and Mobei-Jun led them into the adjoining room that served as his and Shang Qinghua’s office.

Shang Qinghua started to take off the cloak, but a sharp glare from Mobei-Jun stopped him. He left it on instead.

Liked the idea at first. I just felt it would take a longer than a brief one-shot, so I kinda procrastinated and lost interest. Will I come back to this one? Not likely.

[spockandawe]

Oh, would you look at that, is it fish book pitch o’clock again? IT SURE IS!!

So, here’s my angle du jour. I’m a sucker for a feral and/or unsocialized fictional character, especially if the story puts them in a position where they either need or want to catch up to their peers on the social front. I didn’t really click with Jin Zixuan until I saw a post breaking down how his awkwardness made a lot of sense in terms of growing up isolated and undersocialized, and I really love takes on young Lan Wangji that really lean into him not knowing how to play with the other children. It’s more fanon than canon, given screentime, but I love takes on Mobei-jun that do the same thing. And! Outside of the cnovel world altogether, it’s part of why i would Die for both Gideon Nav and Harrowhark Nonagesimus. It’s so tasty! 

And Jing-wang is a version of this that I don’t think I’ve seen before. I’ve had this bouncing around in my head for a while, but I can’t quite come up with any parallels. Jing-wang grew up isolated in one way because he was an imperial prince, with a dead mother and no surviving siblings. The boy doesn’t have many peers, and things are... messy with his half-brothers. But since he’s mute, he’s (theoretically) not in the running for the throne, and he’s not involved in as much political wheeling and dealing as the other princes. And also since he’s mute, communication with other people is a bit of an ordeal, and only a few people who are very close to him are good at interpreting him, outside of him writing things down. I get the idea that he does very well for himself at understanding and steering the political playing field, even if he’s not mixed up deeply in things himself, but he’s.... very not good when it comes to connecting with anyone on any kind of personal level.

But what delights me the most is that this mainly gets expressed through him being 1) a very devoted and well-meaning pet owner, 2) who is very BAD at being a pet owner.

It gets expressed in little funny ways that go by quickly, like in a stressful meeting, where Jing-wang is squeezing Li Yu’s back in a self-soothing way, and Li Yu is like ‘ow, OW, TOO HARD’ and swims away, and Jing-wang is like >:( for two seconds before Li Yu comes back and starts swimming through his fingers again, and Jing-wang realizes he was squeezing too hard. Or later on, after Li Yu’s been living in a huge tank, Jing-wang is like ‘okay, you live in this bottle now, so i can bring you Everywhere with me’ and Li Yu has to fake being unwell so that Jing-wang realizes that the bottle is way too small to be a permanent fish residence. Very quick little empathy things, where Jing-wang gets the intended message pretty darn quickly, but he still had to be taught the lesson in the first place.

But there’s also like... also early on, Li Yu gets a side quest to steal a pearl from the headdress of the Emperor’s favorite concubine. In the process of doing so, he soaks Jing-wang in front of the Emperor, accidentally slaps the concubine in the face, freaks her out, freaks her son out, accidentally frames the two of them for trying to hurt Jing-wang’s pet fish, and knocks the pearl loose... but sends it to the floor. Fortunately, Jing-wang notices that the fish seems REAL interested in this pearl, and retrieves it, but he’s also pissed at the fish for causing so much trouble.

So what does he do? He’s like ‘OKAY. FINE. You want this pearl? Well what I’m going to do is seal this pearl TIGHT inside a glass vial, and then I’m going to put that vial RIGHT in your tank, so you can see the pearl, but you can NEVER HAVE IT’, you know, like a normal human way to treat your pet fish. Only then, Li Yu had already felt bad about causing such a big scene, and sets up a whole apology where he offers Jing-wang his food (because it’s the only thing he has) and tries bowing in apology, and Jing-wang thinks something like ‘...as long as someone was willing to deal with him sincerely, even if they were a fish, he would treat them sincerely in return’ and he gives Li Yu the pearl.

First of all, I never knew I so desperately needed a book where a man tries to play psychological games with his pet fish, second of all, Li Yu is the sketchiest “““fish””” of all time, and third, oh my god Jing-wang how sheltered are you, how do you not realize that this is nowhere in the vicinity of being normal fish behavior??

(to be fair to him, it doesn’t take him that long to realize things are suspicious, and by the thirty-somethingth chapter he has a decent hypothesis for what the fock is going on with his pet fish)

And later in the book, after he knows that this fish is at least sometimes human-shaped, I’d already been pleasantly taken by surprise (in the mtl chapters) to realize that the relationship development involved Li Yu laying down boundaries and holding Jing-wang accountable when he tried getting around them. And like with the squeezing plot point, Jing-wang is very quick to get the message that something he did made this fish/person unhappy, to realize that he doesn’t want them to be unhappy, and to make a very serious effort to change his behavior so he doesn’t make that mistake again. I just hadn’t quite connected the dots to realizing that Li Yu was coaching him through a number of basic emotional development steps even before things reached the point of sex and consent, haha

(in fairness to me, I think Li Yu is extremely oblivious to all of this. which is one of my favorite flavors of character development in fiction, honestly? i love seeing this growth that’s driven by another person, but unintentionally so, so that two people end up drifting closer and closer, and becoming more and more important to each other, without that ever being something they deliberately work towards)

And I think that the idea that Li Yu is coaching Jing-wang through the steps of emotional growth is honestly supported by the other characters in the novel. In the “original” book, Jing-wang falls in love with and marries Chu Yanyu, who very definitely is not in love with him, and is happy to let Jing-wang get hurt and suffer on his behalf, through what sounds like a very unhappy, toxic relationship. In the book we get, all it takes is a little affection and attention from a pet fish, for Jing-wang to totally ignore what should have been Chu Yanyu’s entry into his life, and for him to continue ignoring Chu Yanyu no matter how many times he’s thrown/throws himself into Jing-wang’s path.

Jing-wang does have some people who care about him, but those relationships are... either unequal, or not-mutual, or made difficult in other ways. The Emperor cares about him, but has complicated feelings, since the Empress died shortly after Jing-wang’s birth, where she was already in poor health after losing two other sons, and it seemed like her health got worse after Jing-wang was born mute. The Emperor also tries not to pay him too much attention, because he’s ineligible to inherit the throne anyways, and paying him attention would make him more of a political target. Jing-wang’s main servant, Wang Xi, cares about him deeply, and is the most reliable interpreter for his nonverbal communication, but is also a servant, not a peer. And Jing-wang’s cousin (on his mother’s side) likes him a lot, but their temperaments are highly incompatible, and Jing-wang tends to get annoyed and throw him out when he comes to visit. (the rest of his mother’s family cares about him too, but Jing-wang isn’t a social beast, and doesn’t make himself terribly accessible either)

And like, early, early in the book, at that stressful meeting where Jing-wang squeezes the fish too hard, before things get stressful, the Emperor is completely derailed from the initial purpose of the meeting, because he’s so pleased that Jing-wang has something he cares about, even if it’s just a little pet fish. He continues to be increasingly pleased with this fish as the book goes on, and it’s both hella charming, but also very :( for what it says about how detached Jing-wang was from the world for the last twenty years of his life. And as of chapter 27, Li Yu is trying to meddle with the book plot to save Jing-wang’s cousin from a scheme that will ultimately see him dead, and Jing-wang just agreed to go with his cousin to the imperial palace, to keep an eye on him. And Wang Xi is so moved by this outreach from Jing-wang that he legit tears up. 

Jing-wang is so isolated! Jing-wang is able to play politics, but he does not know how to deal with other people on a friendly social level, and Li Yu is accidentally helping him catch up! I was invested purely on the basis of ‘oh my godddd, jing-wang loves his fish so much,’ which he absolutely does, taking care of his fish is basically his number one priority, but that’s not nearly all there is to this situation! I’m so excited to read the chapters covering the initial relationship development as translated by a human, rather than a machine, because I just know there’s tasty, tasty emotional content in there. 

I could have been totally happy with a book where Jing-wang remained cold and detached with one (1) exception, and that’s a relationship paradigm I totally enjoy reading, but seeing Li Yu accidentally teach him to open up and form attachments to other people too is so rewarding and I love it! I know later on, his cousin is falling in love at the same time he is, he has more dealings with his father, and his mother’s family enters the scene here and there, and I badly need to read it. This is just the best comfort food I could have asked for right now. It’s a lovely balance of cute, moving, and absolutely ridiculous, and has character development more gripping than I could have ever expected. I love it so much, you guys ;u;

[foralternateuniverses]

K so, I can't not mix things that I like so an MXTX novels YgoISH au has been created. So some ideas for the au:

Millenial items? Not really.  

The Lan family is basically like the Ishtars, except their mission is only to keep items safe and supresed (they collect dangerous, usually very much possesed, items). But something happened and a lot of items were lost, now they’re looking for them.

Yue Qingyuan and Mu Qingfang are Shen Yuan’s older brothers and Ning Yingyi his younger sister. Shen Yuan has a fan -possesed by Shen Jiu- that he can`t get rid of. Shen Jiu has a personal vendeta against Luo Binghe because Luo Binghe’s past life was the one who brought his end.

Mo Xuanyu has Chenqing -possesed by Wei Wuxian (the only good ghost out of the main 3). He kind of wants to help Wei Wuxian gain the memories of when he was alive.

Xie Lian has the crying-smiling mask (possesed by White No Face). He’s also the one who has had the item the longest, he kind of has given up cuz no matter how hard he tries he doesn’t seem to be able to free himself from the godforsaken mask, yet it terrifies him all the same.

Lan Zhan has dreams of his past life.

The vessels (Mo Xuanyu, Shen Yuan and Xie Lian) recieve messages and missions from The System. Nobody knows what The System’s objective is; sometimes it gets them to do good things, sometimes not so good things and other ties it’s control is too much. Throughout their different lives The System has used the main 3 to collect/harvest rescentment, what does The System wants/needs the rescenment for? Who knows! Nothing good tho! TheSystemisbasicallyZorc,thodifferentofc

People with possesed items:

Mo Xuanyu - Chenqing - Wei Wuxian

Shen Yuan/Shen Qingqiu - fan - Shen Jiu

Xie Lian - mask - Bai Wuxiang

Ming Yi - shovel - He Xuan

Shang Qinghua - brush - Shang Qinghua

Luo Binghe - Xin Mo

I (and my sis) decided to have the characters divided in the 3 years of highschool and uni:

1st year:

Lang Qianqiu

Quan Yizhen

Gongi Xiao

Liu Mingyan

Luo Binghe

Ming Fan

Ning Yingyi

Nian Qingnuzi

QiRong

Qin Wanrong

Sha Hualing

2nd year:

Hua Cheng

Jiang Cheng

Lan WangJi

Mianmian

Mo Xuanyu

Nie Huaisang

Qin Wanyue

Su She

Wan Lingjiao

Wen Chao

Wen Ning

Xiao Ying

Jian Yu

Zhuzhi Lang

3rd year:

Feng Xin

Mu Qing

Xie Lian

Shi Qinxuan

Ming Yi

Jian Lan

Liu Qingge

Mobei Jun

Qiu Haitang

Shang Qinghua

Shen Yuan

Song Lan

Xiao Xingcheng

Wen Zhuliu

Yin Yu

Qin Qingqi

Uni:

Shi Wudu

Jiang Yanli

Jin Guanyao

Jin Zixuan

Jin Zixun

Ke Mo

Lan Xichen

Ling Wen

Mu Qingfan

Nie Mingjue

Pei Ming

Qin Su

Qiu Jianluo

Rong Guang

Wen Qing

Wen Xu

Xuan Ji

Yue Qingyuan

Yushi Huan

-mod Zeth

[delicioussshame]

Part Five of the Moshen Thing.

Shen Qingqiu waits to be announced before he enters Mobei-Jun’s quarters. He doesn’t want to disturb him for, if he’s honest with himself, is only personal gossip. He’s just really curious about what happened with Shang Qinghua? And if nothing happened Mobei-Jun might be depressed, and it’s not like Mobei-Jun is going to talk about his feelings on the matter to his entourage. It’s going to take all he has to get a few words from him if it went wrong, but he feels up to the challenge!

Turns out he won’t have to. He can tell from the relaxed way Mobei-Jun is standing and the faintest trace of a smile on his face that something very good happened since the last time he saw it. “How was Shang Qinghua?”

White teeth flash when he answers. “Fine.”

His fan, plum blossoms covered in snow, hides his own smile. “I see.” Hopefully they’ll be able to make it work. Shen Qingqiu has no trust in Shang Qinghua’s capacity to be a decent partner to anyone, but Mobei-Jun obviously disagrees. Shen Qingqiu wants to be the one in the wrong this time. “I wish you the best.” Since that’s how it is, he’s going to get all the dirty details from Airplane. That’s going to be way easier than trying to extract them from Mobei-Jun. “I’m sure you have better things to do than waste your time on me.” Like courting your new flame.

Mobei-Jun stops him from leaving by grabbing his arm. “Don’t go.”

He must have questions. Maybe he’s nervous now that he has to handle an actual relationship with a human? “Do you need something from me?” He keeps his tone calm and open. He doesn’t especially want to become their relationship therapist, but one does what one cans.

Mobei-Jun doesn’t let him go. “Thank you.”

Shen Qingqiu is flushed with pride. Look at this cold demon lord learning how to act like a person! Shang Qinghua better be grateful Shen Qingqiu warmed him up for him!

Emotionally! He meant emotionally! “I don’t need thanks. Just be happy.” He gestures at his arm, still caught in Mobei-Jun’s hold. “Though you might want to stop being touching me this freely.”

Mobei-Jun frowns. “Why?”

Shen Qingqiu waves his fan in amusement. “Shang Qinghua might get jealous.” That might have been fun. Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky deserves all the bullying he gets for having written this world. He shouldn’t have said anything.

“Why would he?”

Is that a hard concept to grasp? “It’s not really proper to flaunt your previous attachment when you have a new lover.”

“Previous.”

Shen Qingqiu starts to feel uneasy. “You did confess to Shang Qinghua, didn’t you? Or the reverse, it doesn’t really matter.”

This seems to make sense to Mobei-Jun. “Yes.”

“Then, he would expect fidelity.”

He can see the confusion on Mobei-Jun’s face. Shit. “Fidelity.”

“Most people only have one partner. They expect that partner to be loyal to them.”

“I’m a king. I might choose many spouses.”

Fuck. This is what you brought on yourself by writing a stallion novel, Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky! Your own love interest is planning on gathering a harem! “And you told him that?”

But he knows what he’ll hear before he does. “He must know.”

He might not. Mobei-Jun didn’t have any canonical love interest. “You need to tell him about it. As soon as possible.”

“Junshang doesn’t mind.”

Shen Qingqiu is not getting in, shit! Luo Binghe isn’t an example for anyone to follow! And Luo Binghe himself isn’t out there actively adding flowers to his harem without Shen Qingqiu’s input, which he would definitely need or they would be having Words. “He doesn’t matter. Shang Qinghua does. Talk to him.”

Mobei-Jun stays mute for a while. Shen Qingqiu waits in very awkward silence.

What he says when he finally decides to speak doesn’t help. “You wouldn’t mind?”

Shen Qingqiu chokes. He doesn’t want to be involved in this mess, thank you! “I thought this would end that once you had Shang Qinghua.” When he finally allowed himself to really think about it, it became obvious. Shen Qingqiu already has… a reputation in the demon realm for his unparalleled hold on the strongest member of their kind. The last thing he needs is to become known as a home-wrecker, thank you. As tentative as the relationship between Shang Qinghua and himself can be, he’s not going to ruin his chance at happiness for one of Binghe’s kinky wishes. “You won’t even miss me. Shang Qinghua is too much of a handful.”

Mobei-Jun seems doubtful

In other circumstances, Shen Qingqiu would be flattered. “Talk to him.” How did he even became the resident therapist, he will never know. Of all the anachronisms Airplane included, why not this one? A good therapist might just have saved Luo Binghe from himself.

Sadly, it would also have made for a pretty boring book. Shen Qingqiu can already hear the pleas of needing money and pleasing the audience.

Mobei-Jun frowns but nods.

Shen Qingqiu escapes from this hell he made for himself as fast as he can.

____________

And then nothing happens.

For weeks.

He means, lots of things happens, but not on the ice demon/fellow transmigrator front.

It is possible Shen Qingqiu hears nothing because they’re both not staying at Binghe’s palace and Shen Qingqiu himself has spent some time at the sect, but still. A letter would have been nice. ‘Hello, we’re doing fine, thank you for being our marital counsellor’, something of the sort. Or even ‘Never put your hand on my husband again, you trollop!’ He just wants to know!

“Shizun can stop fretting. Mobei-Jun will look over the castle while I’m visiting the Southern provinces. He can ask him himself.”

Shen Qingqiu shouldn’t be surprised Luo Binghe noticed his agitation. Very few things relating to him escape his husband’s attention.

Still, Shen Qingqiu knows why his disciple really requested Mobei-Jun's presence. Should he take it as a sign something went wrong? Or very right? “Mobei-Jun didn’t object?”

Luo Binghe snorts. “Why would he. He’s probably eager to put his hands on Shizun again.”

But Shang Qinghua! “Considering his actual status, I very much doubt it.”

“All this time, and yet my husband is still blind to his own charms. This disciple is very lucky. That way, Shizun won’t think of looking for someone else.”

Shen Qingqiu is torn between being flattered and sighing. Binghe, why are you still bringing that up? This master has no intention of leaving you.

That’s a subject he really doesn’t feel like revisiting again. Oh well, if Mobei-Jun is coming, he’ll surely bring Shang Qinghua along. Shen Qingqiu will get to the bottom of this himself.

____________

“Seriously, bro, what are you worrying about? Everything is fine.”

“Is it? Is it!? Your love interest has every intention of sleeping around with anyone he takes a fancy to and everything is fine!? Even you must have higher standards.” Shang Qinghua had very conspicuously arrived at Mobei-Jun’s side, looking less stressed than Shen Qingqiu had ever seen him, if no less hyper. Shen Qingqiu had detected the change in seconds. He knows when someone is getting laid right, okay? He’s intimately familiar with what that’s like, courtesy of basically being the heroine.

All he’d felt at the sight had been happiness for his compatriot and the other demon in his life. He had had no plans to disturb their bliss! So why are they having this conversation right now? Shouldn’t Shang Qinghua work on keeping his lover in check instead of trying to pimp him out?

“You’re exaggerating. It’s only you. He was already sleeping with you before he was doing me anyway. If anything, I’m the interloper.”

How is this his life? “I’m not romantically involved with Mobei-Jun, so of course I’m the one in the way.”

Shang Qinghua stays silent.

…What the fuck is that silence supposed to mean!? “Did you forget I’m married to the protagonist? I don’t need anyone else! I really wish people would remember that!”

“That’s something you don’t have worry about. Everyone knows you’re married to Luo Binghe. He’s not subtle about it. That’s not the point. The point is I knew, well no I didn’t know what I was getting in when I included harems in my story, but I did it anyway, the point is I expected this outcome okay? Luo Binghe being loyal to you is close to a miracle, not the rule. Getting Mobei-Jun is already more than I could ever have dreamed for. He’s not gonna go against the grain for me, and that’s fine. And if he’s gonna have someone else, who better than you? You’re not gonna marry him, and you’re not gonna ask him to leave me, so I don’t have anything to complain about.”

“…Are you fucking serious right now?”

Shang Qinghua pats his fucking shoulders like he’s a lady having the vapours. “Calm down. Keep breathing. It’s going to make sense if you think about it.”

“You allowing your lover to sleep around because you think you’re not good enough for him not to is never going to make sense.”

Shang Qinghua flinches like he just hit him. Good. Maybe he’ll understand how completely stupid he’s being. “Bro, that was way harsh. What did I ever do to you to deserve that?”

Shen Qingqiu just stares him down until he squeals. Please, Shang Qinghua knows exactly what he did, mainly everything around them.

“Not everyone has like, crazy powers of seduction that can make anyone fall for them, okay? Some of us have to content themselves with what they can have.”

Shen Qingqiu chokes. He does not have crazy powers of seduction, what the hell!

Not the point. “Did you tell Mobei-Jun that?”

Shang Qinghua’s eyes bug out. “So that I can look even more pathetic than I already do? No way, bro, no way. He told me he was eventually going to marry other people, I said I knew that, he kissed me, and then I-“

“Shut up! I don’t need to know about that!” He already knows more than enough about Mobei-Jun in bed! He really doesn’t need to know about Shang Qinghua! “Shouldn’t you have elaborated more?”

“And say what? Sorry, you’re not allowed to have an heir, you’re gonna have to let your bloodline disappear?”

“Are you seriously telling me you didn’t include mpreg in this mess? Or like, can’t he pick one of his nephews or something?”

“Excuse me, which part of stallion novel screams mpreg to you! Of course I didn’t include that! Not that I would be surprised if you fucking everything up caused a way for it to happen to exist! And yes, he could pick a member of his family as his heir, but then I would be stopping him from having children and that’s not cool. Tiny little Mobei-Juns running around with serious faces! Even your frozen heart must want to see that!”

…That would be heart-stoppingly cute.

So would all the tiny Binghes that were supposed to exist and that Shen Qingqiu ruthlessly culled by stealing their father for himself.

“…Bro, don’t be like that, that’s not what I meant, don’t be sad! They’ll kill me if you’re sad!”

Shen Qingqiu gets a grip on himself. Now’s not the time. “I’m not sad.”

“…Sure bro, you’re not.”

“You’re the one that has reasons to be sad.”

“Not really. I really am okay with it.”

Well, Shen Qingqiu isn’t.

Something is going to have to be done.

[peerless-soshi]

Moshang and 24/86 for the ask? Or 4/75 maybe

Rules: Send me two (2) tropes from this list + a ship and I’ll describe how I’d combine them in the same story.

Coffee Shop AU + Bed Sharing  

Most accidents occur at home. Or work, if you’re like Shang Qinghua and basically reside there.

Normally, he would be angry with his unlucky life, minimum working wage and hands trembling like a blender, but today it was all good since a certain customer visited the coffee shop and sat by the table to the right of him. Shang Qinghua looked away and swallowed a little too loud. It was almost suspicious how empty the coffee shop was, despite it being the Sunday evening. His heart raced, playing noiseless music and drowning out chill radio noises. He just hoped the customer didn’t hear it.

This particular customer’s name was Mobei Jun - Shang Qinghua spotted it entirely by chance on his credit card - and caught the waiter’s eye three months ago, when in the middle of winter he had ordered an ice cream as cold as his blue eyes. Back then, Shang Qinghua had spent way too much time daydreaming about his lips, a bit dirty from whipped cream, which resulted in spilling coffee on another customer and working after-hours. As if he didn’t live in this shop anyway. Shang Qinghua was ashamed only because Mobei Jun had looked at him like he was a clumsy snail falling off the wall, which was almost fair. And yet, from that day he was buying their coffee every weekend…

“You know, give me that already,” Mobei Jun growled under his breath.

Shang Qinghua jumped at it. He didn’t even noticed when Mobei Jun walked to the counter! Wondering what it would be like to drink this coffee together, preferably with just one straw, turned out to be a much more fun activity. He sighed as his gaze drifted down. A creamy snowflake he was trying to draw ended up as a milky pile of melted snow… How embarrassing. Though his client looked like a person who would just stir it at once.

Mobei Jun pointed to the cup. “Pathetic.”

“What?” Shang Qinghua snapped back, his tone resembling that of a child yelling about little scolding. “It’s just a small accident! Actually, I’m really good at making tea, fine?”

His knowledge on the secrets of barista’s work was pretty limited, but it didn’t mean he had to admit it here and now. What’s more, his tea was indeed good.

Mobei Jun’s eyebrow rushed up, and his lips twitched in a way that could be seen as a half smile. “If you say so….”

Maybe good appearance didn’t go hand in hand with a good character. Maybe Shang Qinghua should care more about such details. Maybe. But now, he just winced and walked past Mobei Jun, ready to save his wretched waiter honor.

As it turned our, serving coffee with grace was much easier in movies.

The problem was that Shang Qinghua didn’t even perceive what happened; one moment he was holding his head high, and then found himself on the floor, pitch black of coffee with no milk surrounding him. He groaned pitifully.

“Hey!”

No answer.

“You! Wake up. Now.”

With difficulty, Shang Qinghua opened his eyes and met Mobei Jun’s icy stare. The man was leaning over him with an inscrutable expression. Shang Qinghua’s head hurt, his back as well, and it sucked, but hey! At least he got the very awesome view!

“What’s going on?” he murmured, noting with surprise that his cheeks were on fire. Perhaps blood rushed to his head; a side effect of the fall.

“You slipped on some coffee. How have you even survived here?” Mobei Jun answered, helping him sit. Immediately, colorful butterflies flied before Shang Qinghua‘s eyes and burst into a rainbow mirage. He laid down again, through the floor was not comfortable enough to spend the night on.

“I’m tougher than I look,” he finally said with a faint smile that Mobei Jun didn’t return.

“Are you dizzy?” he asked in return, “or are you nauseous?”

Shang Qinghua shook his head, and the wave of sickness hit him like the floor. The only thing that could make this worse was actually puking on a customer’s shoes. Still, he would rather be caught dead. Heavens, let him die.

“It can be a concussion. Don’t die on the street,” Mobei Jun said, as if reading his mind.

“No worries. There’s a mattress in the back room, I’ll just stay here. I’d miss my last bus anyway.”

“You sleep here?” Mobei Jun repeated in disbelief.

“It’s close to work,” Shang Qinghua said and laughed to himself. It was painfully humiliating anyway - at least he could be cool about it.

What he would never imagine was Mobei Jun, still cold and serious, picking him up and moving to the store room. And carefully placing him on the old, stinky mattress with protruding spring. No chance in hell he would imagine something so surreal, so weird and beautiful.

“What? What are you… sir?”  Shang Qinghua said, getting red like a brick wall and making it all more awkward.

“I’m giving you first aid,” Mobei Jun answered.

Sure, just like that. As if every second weekendhe was carrying in his arms half-awake strangers. But maybe that’s what he did. Who knew? Of all people, Shang Qinghua was not going to complain, instead grasping this fleeting moment like a silly butterfly caught in a spider web.

“Then let me make you a thank-you-coffee, sir!”

“I don’t want it.” Mobei Jun shook his head, and looking right at him added, “But ice cream is fine.”

Hard to say if this was good or bad that Shang Qinghua spent his entire night locked from the inside in the coffee shop, eating frigid desserts with a person he knew nothing about. But in his eyes there were few chances worth the risk as much as this one. So when around 4 a.m. he woke up from a shallow dream to face Mobei Jun snoring next to him, Shang Qinghua didn’t think much and just pulled him on the mattress, wrapping tightly in a staff blanket. If Mobei Jun woke up, he’s never shown it. 

Shang Qinghua needed exactly one year - and one relationship anniversary full of ice cream - to ask himself why Mobei Jun didn’t just drive him home. 

[gothtistic-stims]

I was feeling invalid

Quick warning: the is a *long* post, and the invalidity I felt was actually remedied by writing this, so do not feel obligated to read it all! Sure, when I was younger I chose to be alone a *lot*, but I had friends. I was socially awkward, sure, but what 5 year old is really that great at being social? Yeah, whenever I went somewhere new I would cling to my sister and be completely unable to make new friends, but by the same token, at a *very* young age I figured out an algorithm for making and maintaining friendships: compliments! I think it was when I was 8 that I figured this out, which was fortunate because at around 7 kids were no longer friends with the entire class, and making friends was no longer easy. At 7, I found myself alone at recess nearly every day, hyperfixated on finding 4-leaf clovers (I was finding at least 1 a day at one point), so when I discovered the compliment algorithm I was able to smoothly transition and continue making friends. Of course, I still chose to be alone for a vast majority of recesses. But being asocial doesn't mean I'm autistic. I was an extremely naiive child, kids easily lied to me and I believed them. But being naiive in and of itself doesn't necessarily mean I'm autistic. When I was in kindergarten I was friends with someone. Close friends. In first grade, however, she avoided me like I was the plague. I cried and cried, and even confronted her, and she basically just told me "idk, I guess I just don't really like you." But having a person dislike me doesn't mean I'm autistic. I was always moving as a child, I had attention problems, and I also was diagnosed with both adhd and ocd when I was only 8. I talked too fast and was known to mumble (I say "was" as if I don't still do those things now lol). I also many times forget the word I want to use, and I end up blabbering nonsense trying to figure out how to convey what I want to say. Sometimes I don't forget whole words, I can't translate my thoughts because my thoughts aren't organized like normal thoughts. A majority of the time I am thinking in either pictures or feelings rather than words, and I simply can't say anything related to the topic I want to talk about because in my mind there are literally no words to even begin explaining it. I'm 1000% better at writing than talking. But speech problems don't necessarily mean I'm autistic. I guess I had experience with going partially nonverbal, but I never had a word to describe being physically unable to speak or initiate conversations unless spoken to first. But again, going partially nonverbal sometimes doesn't mean I'm autistic. When I was little my sister was diagnosed with aspergers. She would throw huge tantrums/melt down easily, so a lot of the focus went to her. I never really had any melt downs. In fact, when I was 6, my sister paid me a nickle to not cry in front of her, and it took *years* to be able to cry in her vicinity again. However, I was certainly not immune to crying; I was an empath. If you were crying, chances were I was crying too. Whenever my sister had a meltdown I would feel her pain, and I would hide in my favorite place underneath the same chair. I *had* to cry there. But high empathy doesn't mean I'm autistic - in fact, there's even a stereotype that autistics don't feel empathy at all. When I was 11, I was half forced out of my friend group and half decided for myself to leave it. I had one friend at the time, and she (let's call her "M") was hella popular. I never fit into the friend group. I was invited to fewer and fewer parties as time went on, and no one in the group except for my one friend liked me. Eventually she stopped liking me too, and I was left to fend for myself. But being disliked doesn't mean I'm autistic. I was briefly friends with the girl I was assigned to share a seat with on the bus. We started a whole mini show routine that we would do every day on the bus. It was called the Stupid and Cupid Show. Despite my efforts to get her to change the name, I was stuck being known as "Stupid." I never realized at the time how horrible that name made me feel, but it didn't matter, because eventually she left me as well. As is said in the last paragraph, being disliked doesn't mean I'm autistic. In seventh grade I was looped into a whole strange "family" (which is a story for another time) and suddenly had a *ton* of people considering themselves to be friends with me. It was around then that I realized I was touch averse, because PEOPLE I DIDN'T KNOW KNEW MY NAME AND KEPT HUGGING ME WITHOUT ASKING. Fortunately this didn't last long either, because like all of my frienships, it dissolved pretty quickly. This time, however, everyone blamed me for something I didn't do, and I was left with that entire huge group hating me. I didn't even find out why everyone suddenly hated me until a year later. But useless teen (not even, we were like ~11-12 years old) drama doesn't mean I'm autistic. My entire time in middle school was honestly horrible. My typical algorithm for making friends stopped working, and while I found a temporary replacement (empathizing with people as conversation) it was not nearly as effective. I was never exactly bullied per se, I just got stuck in the same classroom with some really fuckin mean people. I called them all "Tapper Dude." They would bang out off beat tunes on their desks *constantly*. This banging was sensory HELL ( though i didn't know the term "sensory hell" yet). I was going home and often crying because of the stress of being trapped with these people who wouldn't stop (the teachers didn't even try to stop them despite my many, many complaints). I couldn't do anything, couldn't work,couldn't concentrate, and would literally beg my teachers to let me work in the hallway so I could finally have some peace. They literally never let me work in the hallway, despite it being silent (except for that damn banging) individual work. ( I'm honestly still fuckin pissed that my teachers did nothing to help me!) But being hypersensitive to some banging on a desk doesn't mean I'm autistic. Jumping back to never being able to sit still, I still stim today. Not nearly as much then as I do now though. The need to stand rather than sit in my desk at school coulde easily be attributed to my adhd. On top of needed to stand, I was always doodling on my worksheets. Teachers would make me redo the entire sheet if they found my doodles, or they would grab my drawing off of my desk and crumple it up and throw it in the trash. Even as I type this now, my legs are shaking and bouncing and hitting each other. But this could easily be blamed on my having adhd. Having ADHD doesn't mean I have autism. I had weird fixations when I was younger. At 5 it was finding 4-leaf clovers, at 9 it was arranging bookshelves, which after ~6 months evolved into an obsession with reading classics. At only 9 years old, I attempted to read the entirety of Mobey Dick (I didn't get a chance to finish, the school year ended and I had to return the book to the school library 😣). Up until I was 8 I was obsessed with all things medical ( which involved reading the same 3 books over and over and over again). At 17 I became obsessed with slugs /sea slugs ( as I'm sure many of you are aware) along with developing an obsession with autism in and of itself. And ever since I was 5, I've been obsessed with hypnosis, the topic is in my brain basically 24/7, though I try to ignore this obsession because it's nearly impossible to find good media representations of it. I was exposed to porn at a very young age because of my seeking out hypnosis related material, and ever since then I've been wary of seeking it out for fear of finding even more erotic content 😣😣😣. Basically, what I'm saying is, I have had special interests, but I've also seen that something similar (hyperfixations) can be found in, once again, adhd!! So special interests don't necessarily mean I'm autistic. Eye contact. Hello darkness my old friend :)). I honestly have always hated eye contact, but, just like with my social skills, I figured out a loophole at an extremely young age. Foreheads and noses are an autistics best friends, and using these tools, I believe I've effectively fooled everyone I've encountered into think I have good eye contact. Honestly, up until I learned more about autism, I kinda just assumed eye contact was a figure of speech or something that people said better never actually did. But poor eye contact doesn't mean I'm autistic. Figures of speech are weird. I often overthink them to the point of incomprehensibility. I use figures of speech all the time (in fact I believe I used one earlier in this very post), but I've begun to suspect that all of the figures of speech I "understand" are only understood because school spent so much time drilling the meaning into my head. My suspicions arised from the fact that whenever I hear a new figure of speech, I don't understand what it means, even sometimes after it's been explained to me. On top of that, with sarcasm, I can only understand it if it's used by someone I know well. Understanding or not understanding figures of speech don't necessarily mean I'm autistic though. I've always been accident prone. I crash into walls and tables and chairs. I've also fallen both up and down the stairs. My fine motor movements also took much longer to develop as compared to others. Messy scissor cuttings, messy shirt after eating, and messy handwriting. My mom calls my handwriting "chicken scratch", though I personally don't think it's that bad. But poor coordination doesn't mean I'm autistic. When I was little, I only ate like 3 things. Everything else was considered absolutely disgusting. My parents would literally pay me to try certain foods, but it usually ended up being gross or a bad texture. Smells could also be *incredibly* overwhelming. Ketchup especially. I was supposed to clear the table every day, but whenever my parents used ketchup, I would either cry until they let me off the hook or pay my sister to do it for me. Even now, I refuse to even touch a clean ketchup bottle, it's just g r o s. My mom also eats this really gross cranberry chicken salad thing that I can't even be on the same level of the house when she's eating it because it'll literally cause me to cry. I also can't touch the carpet barefoot, and certain textures are *horrid*. Though not formally diagnosed with either autism or sensory processing disorder, I am 100% sure I have sensory processing disorder. My sensory issues are worse than my sister's, and she's actually been diagnosed with autism! From others, I've never really mentioned that I think I'm on the autism spectrum; I don't think they'd believe me. I seem to hold a conversation just fine! ( that is,until we're in a group of more than two people. Then I lose the ability to tell when it's my turn to speak, so I end up remaining silent, half because I don't know when it's my turn and half because I can never get a word in anyway). Sure, the few friends I have (the empathy algorithm stopped working because my friends broke me and I actually lost all empathy, which I'm still trying to recover from. The latest algorithm is bombarding the person with questions when you can't get a conversation going. * something* has to spark a conversation, right!? W r o n g. This is why I'm down to 3 or 4 friends.) all agree I'm incredibly socially awkward. And sure, I fill any silence with stimming, usually involving grabbing things I'm not supposed to touch or poking the person I'm with (idk man, my brain goes into panic mode and it just keeps repeating "poke them" until I appease it). In fact, just yesterday I hung out with a friend, and we had a casual good time. It's times like these that *really* make me question whether or not I'm autistic. Though it may sound like it, I'm not saying it's impossible for an autistic to have friends - in fact, in the short year that I've had this blog, I've managed to befriend quite a few of you wonderful people! I guess I'm just saying that while autistics can have friends and still be valid, *I* can't. Of course, having no friends doesn't mean I'm autistic ( much in the same way having friends doesn't mean I'm *not* autistic ). Overall, I'm worried my social awkwardness / social deficits, though they do exist, aren't enough to actually consider myself autistic. I am confident that I have ADHD and SPD, but what if those two are just combining to closely mimic autism? My blog has gotten fairly popular, and I'm really feeling invalid tonight, so I figured I'd outline the main symptoms and let you guys determine if you're okay with me running an autism blog and using the tags. I still think I have autism, and I shouldn't need to get validation from strangers on the internet, but I felt like it was important to outline this.

[tossawary]

wait can we hear more about da ge mbj au I'm very interested

MBJ getting abandoned as a child makes me enjoy imagining him being soft for babies, especially demon babies. Which made me want to see SQH put into a situation with a lost demon child and MBJ getting to see that. 

Which ended in 3,000 words of canon divergence fic.

-

The situation was bad. 

 Airplane’s fellow An Ding disciples were dead. 

 There was a young demon lord unconscious in front of him, probably dying, and Airplane couldn’t bring himself to bring down the rock in his hand. 

 His hand was shaking. He couldn’t make it stop. 

 This System really didn’t give a fuck about the author’s wishes, huh? Airplane Shooting Towards The Sky had been shoved into one of the worst character roles in Proud Immortal Demon Way and left to take the long way around to the plot. Now he was being told that his favorite character was expendable? Irrelevant? Talk about insult to injury! Nothing was sacred here, was it? 

 Airplane put down the rock. 

 Then he picked up the rock again. 

 He looked at it. 

 Then he hurled the rock away and put his head in his hands instead. 

 He came to a decision - a shitty decision for a shitty situation - and got to work saving his future murderer’s life. At least he would know some of what to expect if he kept the storyline mostly the same! Besides, his life wasn’t good enough to be that concerned about it! Maybe the System would put him into a decent role next time! 

 Maybe it was empathy at seeing someone being fucked over by the System! 

 Airplane did his best to slow down Mobei-Jun’s bleeding and loaded the man into the cart. He also did his best to ignore all the dead bodies around them. Gross. 

 That should have been that! He should have then been on his way to continue making a really bad decision in a really bad situation. But as Airplane moved to leave the scene of a massacre behind him, he saw movement out of the corner of his eye. He startled, snapping around, prepared to defend himself physically or verbally! 

 Instead, he saw a baby. 

 Ah, well, not a baby baby! But a child somewhere between the ages of three and four years old! A chubby one too! The chubby child was crouched halfway behind a tree, looking at Airplane with wide eyes, little hands clawing anxiously into the grass. It was impossible to miss their little pointed ears and the blue mark in the middle of their forehead. How could anyone miss that kind of family resemblance? 

 The demon child froze upon being noticed. 

 Airplane looked between the demon child and the young demon lord in the card, but the similarities only got stronger the longer he looked! 

 Holy shit! 

 HOLY FUCKING SHIT! 

 But he didn’t remember Mobei-Jun having a child! He remembered Mobei-Jun having siblings, sure, but he was pretty sure that... he’d alluded to Mobei-Jun’s uncle doing away with most of them. Did that mean that this child was supposed to… die? 

 This situation had gotten even worse. 

 Leaving a child here to die was… pretty bad. Airplane had done some not very good things to make it in this world and in his sect without losing any sleep over it at all, but the idea of leaving this child to die made Airplane want to be sick! At least, as soon as he realized that if Mobei-Jun had been protecting this demon child and woke up to find this demon child missing, then Airplane would be really, truly, totally fucked no matter how tightly he hugged the man’s thighs! 

 It looked like the demon child had to come too. 

 How the fuck did a person go about catching a demon child?! 

 “Is… this your gege?” Airplane tried carefully. “Is this your gege here?” 

 The demon child didn’t respond. 

 Airplane gestured at Mobei-Jun repeatedly, unsure how to get the message across. “Is this your gege?” he said, louder. “Baba? ...No? Not Baba? Da-Ge? Are you his didi?” 

 That got a blink. 

 “Didi?” Airplane repeated, desperately. “Come here, Didi.” 

 Airplane Shooting Towards The Sky hadn’t handled children since his last life. He’d been one of the younger siblings in Shang Qinghua’s family, so he hadn’t been involved in any of the child-rearing before leaving. But Airplane’s experience wasn’t very good! Some forced babysitting of his father’s do-over children and his mother’s stepchildren’s children didn’t make him an expert! And this was a demon baby! 

 “Didi, your gege needs you,” Airplane wheedled. “Come here! Come on!” 

 Slowly, the demon child began to crawl over towards the cart. 

 “Your gege is hurt and needs help,” Airplane said, in most most soothing and also urgent voice. It was a weird balance! “Come on! Come along! Didi, your gege needs help. He’s hurt. Come here, please, that’s it! That’s right! Good job! You’re doing such a good job coming up here for your gege! We need to get your gege somewhere safe!” 

 The demon child made it to the cart, trying to stay on the far side of it and away from Airplane. Airplane tried not to make himself look too threatening. He also tried not to contemplate his apparent natural talent for kidnapping children, which probably wasn’t something to make a person feel proud. 

 “Didi, can I pick you up? Didi, can I lift you up next to your gege?” 

 Reluctantly, the demon child lifted his chubby arms and let Airplane slowly approach him. Airplane carefully put his hands under their armpits and then hefted them into the cart beside Mobei-Jun. The demon child nearly kicked him in the gut, struggling to get to the unconscious and injured ice demon! 

 “Ah, be careful of the injury-!” Airplane said, trying to move the child back. “OW!” 

 The demon child bit him. 

 Airplane yanked his poor hand back. “You little fucker! Ah, fine! Curl up in your gege’s blood and see if I care,” he muttered. “Let’s just get out of here already.” 

 The demon child curled up against Mobei-Jun’s side and Shang Qinghua got back into the driver’s seat of the cart. Trying to channel his spiritual energy for healing purposes while focusing on driving was hard. Even if he could have managed it properly, he still would have been stuck with an aching hand as it healed, which didn’t make him feel very charitable towards the demons in the back seat. 

 Ungrateful! The both of them! 

 When they finally got to a decent hiding place, unloading Mobei-Jun was nothing less than a pain in the ass. Airplane was forced to negotiate with a two-foot tyrant with needle-sharp teeth who didn’t want to move and didn’t want Airplane to touch his gege. Airplane was forced to wheedle like never before. 

 “Your gege is hurt, but I can help him,” Airplane insisted soothingly. “See that place? It’s safe in there! Don’t you want your gege to be somewhere nice and safe, where no one can see him and I can heal him? Look at that hiding spot! It’s a good hiding spot. We all need to go into the hiding spot now. We’re all going into the hiding spot. Come on, Didi, help me get your gege into the nice, safe hiding spot. Come on now. Be good.” 

 The demon child bared his teeth as Airplane helped him down from the cart, but thankfully didn’t bite again. The demon child then hugged Airplane’s shins very unhelpfully as Airplane hefted Mobei-Jun into his arms. 

 Airplane was forced to shuffle. 

 He never thought he’d be so grateful for all the carrying that An Ding Peak forced its disciples to do! Sometimes, carrying things around was all Airplane did all day long and now it was paying off! Airplane wasn’t as strong as some of his peers, sure, but he still managed to carry a giant ice demon into the “hiding spot” with a little ice demon attached to his leg. He counted himself grateful there was only one Mobei-Jun to deliver inside, because he couldn’t have handled more. 

 Once inside, the demon child curled up against Mobei-Jun’s side again. Airplane took the opportunity to look after the cart’s beast of burden and unload the supplies from the cart, searching desperately for the medical supplies their mission had been allotted. When he finally found the medicine, returning triumphantly, the demon child was ungratefully unenthusiastic about Airplane’s careful approach. 

 “Ah, Didi, don’t growl at me! See, look! Look! It’s medicine! Medicine for your gege to stop the bleeding and... make sure his organs go back on the inside. Eugh. Ah, anyway, I’m helping. It’s okay because I’m helping. See, look, I’m helping. It’s okay.” 

 Airplane managed to get pretty far before the demon child couldn’t take it anymore and tried to bite him again. Airplane shrieked, but managed to wrestle the demon child off him, and ended up grabbing some of the food supplies as a desperate distraction. 

 “Bite this! Bite this! Didi, look, it’s food! Food for Didi!” 

 The demon child growled, but putting the food directly in front of his face caught his attention. The demon child’s eyes narrowed in on the food in a super predatory way that was unseen in human babies. Airplane gladly made the sacrifice. He threw the food to the demon child, who scrambled to catch it, gave it a sniff, and then started to hesitantly nibble on it before taking bigger bites. 

 “See? Don’t bite your Shang-Gege and he’ll give you food instead,” Airplane muttered, quickly turning his attention to the bigger demon. “You stay there and chew that and let me help your gege. I’m helping. I’m helping. I’m helping. Shang-Gege is helping Didi’s gege. Everything is good. Everything is okay. There’s no need for biting.” 

 Airplane didn’t really know how much the demon child understood of what he was saying. The demon child looked more than old enough to understand basic speech. He at least understood “stay”, Airplane decided, by sitting off to the side and anxiously chewing through dried food supplies while Airplane worked rearranging Mobei-Jun’s guts and then bandaging up the blood mess. 

 Maybe it helped to see that Airplane had no intention of eating the unconscious and vulnerable Mobei-Jun or something. He was pretty sure that was a demon thing. 

 He couldn’t bring himself to think about what he was doing! 

 If he thought about his actions here, he was going to throw up or something! 

 So long as he kept his hands moving here, he didn’t have to think about anything. He was just an An Ding Peak disciples hard at work betraying the sect. Yeah. 

 Eventually, Mobei-Jun was in as good a shape as Airplane could get him. The demon child - Didi, Airplane decided to call him - was curled up into a ball beside where Mobei-Jun was lying. Didi looked like he was forcing himself to stay alert. 

 “It’s all okay now,” Airplane said. “See? I helped. Shang-Gege helped your gege. Your Gege needs to sleep to get better and now you can sleep beside him.” 

 Airplane washed himself as best he could and tried to wash Didi a little, but the demon child was resistant and snapped at him. Airplane, expecting this now, successfully dodged the snap and wiped at Didi’s face. Trying to be nice was too much work! Airplane’s clean-up job ended up being pretty shitty. There was no doing anything about Mobei-Jun’s blood staining Didi’s clothes around the knee and elbow. 

 “Ah, fine, curl up in blood again, you little brat,” Airplane sighed. 

 Didi curled up against Mobei-Jun’s side again and, apparently, immediately fell asleep. 

 Airplane secured their hiding place as best he could, took stock of their pitiful amount of resources, and tried not to panic about what the fuck he was was going to do now. He was exhausted. Saving two ungrateful demons was hard work. He had no idea what was going to happen next. He was pretty sure he had just made the worst mistake of his life, but it was a little late to change things now. 

 Airplane found a good patch of floor to watch over the demons and let himself collapse. He was too tired to think anymore. There were too many things to think about. 

 He hoped that Mobei-Jun didn’t die. Demons were hardy and demon lords were even hardier, but the real world that had been made out of his shitty web-novel was really unpredictable sometimes. For all Airplane knew, Mobei-Jun was going to develop an infection and a fever. Maybe Mobei-Jun would die anyway and Airplane was going to be stuck with a bitey demon brat who hated him. 

 Airplane yawned. Keeping his eyes open was becoming really hard. Fuck. 

 Watching Didi’s back go up and down with his unconscious breaths was pretty mesmerizing. It was really tempting to sneak over there and pinch one of those chubby, chubby cheeks. Or those cute demon ears. But the demon child looked almost as tired as Airplane felt and probably bit in his sleep. 

 Airplane really didn’t want to think about what would have happened if he’d just taken off with Mobei-Jun, not knowing the demon child had been hiding nearby. That might have been the worst possible situation. Didi was dirty and exhausted now, sure, but he looked like one of those babies who should have been spoiled and happy all the time, and not mercilessly abandoned to the human world.  

-

 Airplane woke up with a hand around his throat, squeezing. 

 There was a dark shadow above him and an even darker feeling in the air. The hand at his throat felt freezing cold. The air was burning with hateful demonic energy that felt like acid on his skin. Airplane struggled, but it was all immoveable. 

 “Where is he?” the shadow snarled. 

 Airplane choked. 

 His shadowy attacker belatedly seemed to realize that Airplane couldn’t talk when he was being choked to death! The squeezing let up enough for Airplane to breathe again. His lungs felt like they were burning hot and cold! His throat felt crushed and ruined. 

 “What did you do with him?” the attacker demanded. 

 “...W-wh…?” 

 “The child! Where is the child?!” 

 Airplane realized here that he was looking into the face of his future murderer. It was hard to make out in the darkness when he was being choked! 

 Mobei-Jun looked wild. His eyes looked like lightning. 

 “The ch-child… ch- chi- is-” 

 Mobei-Jun snarled again with impatience. 

 Even though it definitely wasn’t Airplane’s fault he couldn’t talk coherently! 

 “H-here,” Airplane choked out. 

 Mobei-Jun’s grip tightened, but then the man froze. His head snapped to the side. 

 Airplane followed the demon lord’s gaze. 

 Through the darkness, if Airplane squinted, he could see a small figure crouched by the supplies. Didi was frozen, watching them, chubby cheeks stuffed with stolen food. 

 Oh, there weren’t words for what Airplane wanted to say to the brat! Sneaking around like this in the middle of the night! Nearly getting Airplane strangled for no reason! 

 Mobei-Jun released Airplane immediately and flew across the room to the demon child, who threw up his arms immediately. Mobei-Jun took his younger brother into his arms and then collapsed heavily to the floor. By the sound of it, he crushed some of their precious food supplies as he fell! But the man was too busy wrapping his arms around the demon child to care about things like that, letting Didi sob into his chest, glaring at Airplane over the demon child’s head. 

 Airplane kept his distance! He knew better than to get anywhere near that! 

 The silence was very heavy. 

 He was certain that Mobei-Jun had reopened his wounds, if they had managed to close at all! As time trickled by them, he could see red seeping down the man’s side. 

 “...There are more bandages,” Airplane said finally, hoarsely. 

 Mobei-Jun’s scowl deepened, his lip curling. 

 “Ah… if- if you want them.” 

 What an asshole! 

 Airplane stayed put and didn’t make any sudden moves. 

 His throat felt like shit, so he tried to heal it with his spiritual energy. It was hard to focus with the demon lord glaring at him like that, on the other side of the room, but he didn’t really have anything better to do. There were only so many names he could silently call this ungrateful young demon who’d attacked the bro who’d saved his life! 

 At least Mobei-Jun hadn’t bitten him too. 

 Time trickled by and by. Eventually, Mobei-Jun’s eyelids began to droop close. The man’s injury appeared to be pulling him back under, whether he liked it or not. 

 After Mobei-Jun’s eyes had closed without opening for a long time, Airplane finally risked moving again. Mobei-Jun didn’t wake up, but Didi’s eyes fixed on Airplane, which made Airplane fear being bitten as he carefully came closer. 

 “Ahhh, see? Your gege is fine. I’m just… just going to put him back to bed, alright? You- don’t get up… just stay there and don’t bite me. We’re putting gege back to bed.” 

 Airplane dragged Mobei-Jun back to where the man had been before, with Didi staying put on his elder brother’s chest. Airplane was sure that this couldn’t be good for the demon lord’s wounds! But clearly Mobei-Jun didn’t give a shit about his own health! 

 “Didi, can you get off gege’s chest? Keep hugging him, just slide off, please? Gege is hurt, remember? Gege is hurt and we need to help him. See, he’s bleeding. Please let your Shang-Gege help again and don’t bite me. Everyone is fine. Everyone is happy. Everyone is getting along just fine and helping and healing. There’s no need to bite your Shang-Gege who is only helping, okay?” 

 Didi was more cooperative this time, sliding off Mobei-Jun chest to hug his less-injured side, while Airplane poked at the demon lord’s bleeding. The injuries looked… a lot better than Airplane would have expected them to. This healing rate was nothing short of astounding. Was this the power of an OP demon lord? How unfair! 

 Airplane did his best fixing the man up again. 

 He should have just let the man rot! 

 Mobei-Jun had just tried to kill him again! He would totally deserve it! 

 But there was a demon child carefully watching and Airplane didn’t want to end up with custody if his future murderer died here after all. What would he do with a demon child? Take them back to the sect?! His master would love that, he’s sure! 

 “Ah, looks like he’s getting lots better,” Airplane told Didi hoarsely, rubbing at his poor throat. “You’re doing a good job looking after him. Good job helping your gege. Keep helping his sleep, okay? Stay right there and don’t go sneaking off again, okay? Please don’t go sneaking off again, your Shang-Gege won’t be able to take it.” 

 Didi just blinked at him. 

 “Good job,” Airplane said. “Good job. Shang-Gege is… going to make sure that everything is okay outside. You stay here and protect your gege. Good job.” 

 That said, Airplane crept backwards, got up, and went outside. 

 Once outside, he promptly fell to his knees and curled in on himself. 

 “Holy fucking shit,” he said. 

[tossawary]

Because my brain does NOT stop even when I’m grounded, today my brain told me, “Hey, I figured out how to make a Hobbit Fusion AU work.” And I was like, “Great! We’re working, though.” And my brain was like, “I’ve figured out how to make it a Pre-Canon Canon Divergence AU for Moshang.”

And I was like, “...I’m listening.”

The Hobbit is another one of my Comfort Media and it got brought up when I was asking about that, but I was feeling kind of “eh” about mixing Tolkien mythology with SVSSS. I mean, the mental picture of Dwarf Mobei-Jun is extremely funny and Shang Qinghua would make a great hobbit! But that interpretation felt a little too direct for my AU tastes.

So, hm, now I have another potential Big Bang contender. My love for The Hobbit is very, VERY strong and looking at my current outline, I have to be like, “Yeah, this could be 50,000 words, no problem.”

It’s a very good outline!

-

After saving Mobei-Jun, Shang Qinghua bailed A.S.A.P. because he honestly thought Mobei-Jun was going to kill him. He psyched himself out of sticking around before Mobei-Jun woke up. Mobei-Jun didn’t get enough information to track Shang Qinghua down.

Shang Qinghua (who isn’t SQH because he isn’t the Peak Lord) decides that he can’t fucking take it anymore and bails from Cang Qiong Mountain Sect too. The System objects, but also falls into line when Airplane shrieks at it. Airplane is going to go become a humble merchant and inventor and there’s nothing anyone can do to stop him!

It turns out that Shang Qinghua’s presence or help was actually crucial to stop some Emperor of the Abyss from taking over the Ice Palace and the Northern Desert. Airplane is like, “Oh, yeah, I remember… offhandedly writing something about that happening in the past off-screen?” It was one of those things that he just threw in there because it sounded really cool, and it gave Mobei-Jun another reason to “owe” Shang Qinghua and not kill him immediately, but he never got to elaborate on it because he was too busy writing stallion novel bullshit.

So, borrowing the lore from my “Horns” one-shot, an extremely powerful Emperor of the Abyss escaped the Eternal Abyss. This is some devouring horror being from the depths of the abyss, which ate everything in its vicinity in the abyss itself and crawled into the Demon Realm to eat more things. The Emperor of the Abyss was attracted to Mobei-Jun’s father. They fought. Mobei-Jun’s father should have won, but didn’t, because he was too fucked up (thanks to his own hedonism or something) to fight properly. What an asshole.

Mobei-Jun’s father was killed and devoured by the Emperor of the Abyss, which has made it… exponentially powerful. It’s now… basically a calamity. The desolation that it leaves in its wake across the Northern Desert is unspeakable. Mobei-Jun and his family, their allied clans, and pretty much all demons in the Northern Desert have had to flee.

Mobei-Jun is currently essentially a “guest” of the Sha Clan. He’s homeless. He’s lost the power of his ancestors. He’s a “king” without a kingdom. It’s humiliating. He needs to kill the abyssal creature to retrieve: his title, his ancestors’ power, and his kingdom.

While working for other demon clans to support his family and people, Mobei-Jun crosses paths with Airplane. Airplane has become a relatively successful merchant and inventor, and he calls himself Shang Houhua. He lives a very comfortable life and does his best to ignore anything resembling the plot. He’s pretty successful at ignoring the plot.

Mobei-Jun is never in a good mood these days, but he’s especially pissed off to see that human who abandoned him all those years ago. Airplane tries to argue that Mobei-Jun told him to fuck off, but Mobei-Jun is too angry. Airplane makes lots of offers in an effort to get Mobei-Jun to spare his life, one of which ends up being a claim that he can help Mobei-Jun kill the Emperor of the Abyss and make him a king again. Mobei-Jun pauses, now even more pissed off than before, and Airplane just starts babbling desperately to save his own skin.

Mobei-Jun was already forming a company to take on a Quest for the Northern Desert - in the hopes of slaying the Emperor of the Abyss and retaking his homeland. Part of the issue has been that forming the company is difficult. Mobei-Jun wants people who are loyal to HIM and ONLY to him. He won’t owe anyone else anything or promise them pieces of his homeland.

(Airplane is like, “Bro, I don’t know if you can afford to be so picky, but okay.”)

So Mobei-Jun is like… “I still want to kill you, but fine, you can come on our quest and help us.”

So Airplane ends up on the Quest for the Northern Desert, led by his very angry future murderer the “king without a kingdom” Mobei-Jun, to fight the calamitous Emperor of the Abyss who killed Mobei-Jun’s father. Fuck.

Some details beyond this opening premise:

Airplane and Mobei-Jun fall in love over the course of the quest, obviously. They have their own hijinks like each chapter of The Hobbit (equivalents to the trolls, to Rivendell, to Goblintown, to Beorn, to Mirkwood, and to Laketown, etc.). 

Oh, damn, I just realized that making a pre-fall Tianlang-Jun and Zhuzhi-Lang the Beorn equivalents would be so fucking funny.

The Emperor of the Abyss is a horrifying Smaug equivalent. It can totally talk because Airplane having a conversation with a draconian horror sounds incredible. I would love to have Airplane outwit the Emperor of the Abyss in some fashion.

Mobei-Jun and Airplane somehow manage to successfully kill the Emperor of the Abyss together. Like, together. Probably using some plot device whipped up or some clever plan devised by Airplane on his feet. Mobei-Jun trusts Airplane at a crucial moment and it all works out. Airplane actually gets Mobei-Jun his kingdom back.

I’m tempted to just skip over the Ring and not having a Ring equivalent. BUT if I made this into a longfic instead of a one-shot, I would have a Ring equivalent (if it was a one-shot, I would ditch the Ring equivalent). I think I would make Xin Mo the One Ring equivalent. During the Goblintown equivalent event, Airplane falls either into the Eternal Abyss or into Bing-Ge’s dimension, where he proceeds to successfully take up Xin Mo because he knows the trick and portal himself out of the Eternal Abyss, or he proceeds to outwit Bing-Ge in some fashion and uses the Xin Mo sword to portal himself back to the right dimension.

So then Airplane is stuck with this super powerful sword that he doesn’t want to use again because he KNOWS that it will fuck him up. He KNOWS that it will FUCK HIM UP. So Airplane has to go through the rest of the quest ignoring the temptation of the Xin Mo sword that he is absolutely not supposed to have and can’t possibly let anyone else have.

(Oh, man, imagining the influence of Xin Mo giving Airplane extra horny thoughts about Mobei-Jun on the rest of the quest is very funny. Like, Airplane was already hot for Mobei-Jun, but now it’s worse and he might never have a normal thought ever again.)

Bagginshield Movie Hug when Airplane turns up again, for sure. Mobei-Jun thought he was dead. Mobei-Jun smiles and everything, until he remembers to frown again.

I’m feeling like I don’t want Airplane to use Xin Mo to help defeat the Emperor of the Abyss, but it makes sense if he does. Him not using it doesn’t make much sense. I do like the idea of Airplane dealing the killing blow and Mobei-Jun’s pride being hurt by Airplane being the one to kill it. I also like the idea of Mobei-Jun being a little smitten by Airplane just… loyally handing him his kingdom and restoring the power of his ancestors. I also really like the idea of Airplane just… not having some super powerful plot device up his sleeve on the quest.

Like, instead of Airplane’s Author God knowledge totally setting him up to deal with this thing no problem, Airplane had NO FUCKING PLAN when he set out with Mobei-Jun. He was talking completely out of his ass when he said he knew how to help Mobei-Jun. That this all worked out at all is almost completely due to luck and improvisation.

That feels MUCH more true to both Shang Qinghua and to Bilbo Baggins. Lucky lads of fast-talking, complaining, lying, not knowing what the fuck is really going on, thirsting after kings with tragic backstories, and somehow not dying despite winging it all the time.

Instead of goldsickness, Mobei-Jun is forced to deal with some side-effects of consuming the Emperor of the Abyss to regain the power of his ancestors. (Demon cannibalism rituals. Yeah.) He starts acting really scary and out-of-character and forceful, until Airplane loses his nerve and runs away. Maybe under the influence of the late Emperor of the Abyss, Mobei-Jun actually tries to kill him? I could see Mobei-Jun trying to kill Airplane for the Xin Mo sword which dealt the finishing blow on the Emperor of the Abyss.

(I need a better name for this thing. If I can’t come up with something that actually sounds good, I might just call it “The Calamity”, but that’s giving me BOTW vibes so I don’t like it. Maybe I’d call it “The Desolation” or something? Ehhhh, I don’t really like that either.)

I want to have a Battle of the Five Armies equivalent, if only so Tianlang-Jun and Zhuzhi-Lang can swoop in as benevolent helpers as the Beorn equivalents. Currently, I’m seeing three options. 1) The orc army equivalent are neighboring demon lords who want to strike while the new Mobei-Jun is getting established. 2) The orc army equivalent is Linguang-Jun trying to kill his nephew and take power at the last minute. 3) The orc army equivalent is Bing-Ge here with an army and he’s pissed off and wants his sword back.

On one hand, 1 and 2 would be SO MUCH EASIER to pull off. I could be really lazy about the whole thing. On the other hand, 3 would be much fresher (more surprising and links back to the Xin Mo element), more challenging and the idea of pre-fall Tianlang-Jun facing off with Bing-Ge delights me. Kick his ass, Tianlang-Jun!

(Su Xiyan gets involved? My brain says YES. Kick his ass, Su Xiyan!)

Also, I was sad about there being no Fili and Kili equivalents, because Mobei-Jun has no friends, and I’ll have to make up a company pretty much from scratch. (Sha Hualing is too young and Luo Binghe hasn’t been born yet.) BUT then I was like, “Where’s Linguang-Jun in all this?” And I would absolutely have Linguang-Jun be a part of Mobei-Jun’s Company. Instead of nephews, Mobei-Jun has a sketchy uncle who might be trying to kill him. Keeping Linguang-Jun out of it might be easier, but actually doing some character-building with him sounds fun and challenging, and I’d rather limit the number of OCs if possible.

Mobei-Jun manages to shake off the goldsickness equivalent somehow, probably through “the power of love” (and/or straight-up “dual cultivation” with Airplane?). Moshang makes up while Mobei-Jun is apparently mortally wounded from fighting Bing-Ge and Airplane thinks this is all his fault. But Mobei-Jun doesn’t die! It’s all good!  

It’d be pretty funny if there was a “Returning to the Shire” equivalent where Airplane leaves because he thinks Mobei-Jun hates him now and never wants to see him again. So then Mobei-Jun has to track his man down like, “Get back here and marry me. (Also I am so sorry for trying to kill you. Please forgive me. I hate myself so much for that.)”

And they all live happily ever after!

Holy shit, this wasn’t in Proud Immortal Demon Way.

[tossawary]

I’m not the Original Asker, but i saw the ‘what if 1/2 demon SQH’ post, and tbh the only way i think it would work satisfyingly is if SQH didn’t know and then found out later? Him believing that he’s 100% human is important to his character, but iirc OG!SQH had basically no backstory, so SQH spending the whole plot thinking he’s an average dude with poor cultivation and then finally later on ending up discovering that he’s also half demon and the ‘sometimes the halves don’t mix well’ he described to LBH applies to him, no demon perks no human perks either?

I don’t think it could really support a full story? But i think that’s really the only way that it could work where SQH’s character is intact, while also playing a bit with the idea that the system or something has been going around filling plot holes, including the original goods’ backstory

But it’s not a plot hole, so there’s no reason for the System to “fix” it. 

I’m afraid I have to disagree, I don’t think that works at all. If Shang Qinghua has no special abilities, no connections, and no idea that he’s a half-demon, then there’s no reason to make him a half-demon. It has no narrative value. All it does is undermine the fact that the original goods was a two-dimensional traitor and weaken Moshang choosing each other despite the fact that they have nothing in common and are supposed to inherently despise and resent each other. In my opinion, it directly undermines SQH / Airplane’s core character concept. 

Now, I’m talking about this from a headcanon and canon interpretation perspective. I already said in the last post that I think Half-Demon or Demon Shang Qinghua has great one-shot potential. From a one-shot concept perspective, there are lots of ways to have fun with Half-Demon or Demon Shang Qinghua to explore lots of different character and relationship angles. 

(Please note, however, that I am not looking to write this idea. I do not need or want help brainstorming how to make Half-Demon SQH concepts work when I have already said that I don’t really personally vibe with the premise.) 

Concept: Airplane complains about being dropped into a totally mediocre, cannon-fodder traitor and demands to know why, as the author, he at least wasn’t made into the protagonist or something. The System takes him seriously, but he’s already bound to the character of Shang Qinghua. So, Shang Qinghua becomes a secret half-demon, which means that he’s got more shit to hide from his sect, and also a Rival Protagonist, which means that the System is suddenly throwing the protagonist’s plot-lines his way. 

This mostly involves demonic warlords showing up and feeling the urge to throw down challenges, or beautiful women being thrown in Shang Qinghua’s path. Neither Shang Qinghua nor the beautiful women are happy about this. Mobei-Jun is definitely unhappy about 1) his human servant having some secret heritage, 2) his human servant being attacked by wife plots, and 3) random demon warlords suddenly having serious aggro for his human servant. 

This can take place at pretty much any time in SVSSS, but I think it would be funny if LBH was shown in the background having a great time not being targeted by the plot, and also Shen Yuan being very confused why plot things aren’t happening while somehow completely missing the fact that they’re happening to Shang Qinghua instead because he’s watching LBH too closely. 

[tossawary]

Chapter 28: “A Growing Family” of “pride is not the word I’m looking for” quotes and commentary. Not a full list of favorite quotes or full commentary.

-

The fact that Shen Qingqiu is waiting for them, just outside of Yue Qingyuan’s office, really doesn’t help the dread that Shang Qinghua is feeling here.

A stocky young woman is standing attentively beside the seated Peak Lord. This is that Fu Qiang character, one of Binghe’s favorite shijies on Qing Jing Peak, here to whisk Peerless Cucumber away for a one-to-one chat on the other transmigrator’s potential relationship to the House of Rejuvenation. Or maybe to give the kid a tutoring session on recovering memories from trauma or something! Shang Qinghua doesn’t know exactly, not having been invited to sit in.

“Shidi,” Shen Qingqiu greets coolly.

“Greetings, Shen-Shixiong,” Shang Qinghua returns, feeling sweaty already, but also weirdly giddy. He’s tempted to wink, but he’s pretty sure that would get him killed. “How are you? You look very well! Aha, how did those ‘other engagements’ go the other day? Meet with anyone? Have a good time?”

Over the top of his elegant fan, Shen Qingqiu immediately gives him a look that could probably kill a lesser man - or maybe a greater one, like someone who has more dignity and shame and whatever than Shang Qinghua does. Shang Qinghua doesn’t flinch. He assumes that the meeting with Yue Qingyuan went well! Which is great! Super great! If it had gone badly, he’s pretty sure that Shen Qingqiu wouldn’t even be setting foot on Qiong Ding Peak now - or at least would have been projecting “I’ll kill to get out of here and I’m mentally picking all my victims” hard enough to send all the Qiong Ding Peak disciples and cultivators off like panicked chickens.

“I don’t know what you mean,” Shen Qingqiu says, downright frosty now. “Shang-Shidi must have been paying too much attention to nonsense gossip again.”

“Ah, of course! Of course! My mistake, Shen-Shixiong! Please forgive me!”

Shang Qinghua looks to his fellow transmigrator next, to reintroduce them, only to find Shen Yuan making a very strange expression. Shen Yuan is looking between Shang Qinghua and Shen Qingqiu kind of like he’s never seen them before. His mouth is even a little open and everything. It takes the kid a few seconds to realize that he has two Peak Lords staring at him and to swallow the strange expression.

- 

AN: Shen Yuan knows that 1) SQQ came to meet SQH personally immediately after their mission was over, 2) SQH stayed in bed the following day for a LONG time, and 3) SQH had a hickey on his neck. 

So when Shang Qinghua makes a reference to the meeting that SQQ had with Yue Qingyuan, almost flirtatiously asking if Shen Qingqiu “met with anyone” and “had a good time”, Shen Yuan is going to draw his own conclusions. 

Namely, that Shang Qinghua and Shen Qingqiu might be sleeping together. 

After all, Shen Yuan doesn’t know about the YQY and SQQ backstory! Shen Yuan only knows that Shang Qinghua is weirdly friendly with PIDW’s most famous scum villain and that Shen Qingqiu apparently likes SQH enough not to be an asshole to Luo Binghe. Shang Qinghua kind of talks like they’re friend, so what if they’re... more than friends?! 

Meanwhile, Shang Qinghua cannot fathom anyone EVER considering that he and SHEN QINGQIU might be lovers. It’s not an idea that he is in a position to have because what the fuck?! 

I was tickled pink when I realized that things were in position to have the disciples think that Shangjiu is a thing. I was already planning on having them notice Shang Qinghua’s brand-new-relationship good mood. Shen Yuan may not notice when people are in love with HIM, but he did still read a twenty-million-word stallion web-novel, so he’s totally prepared to assume that secret affairs are happening for OTHER PEOPLE. 

- 

His fellow transmigrator hastily performs the appropriate greeting. Shen Qingqiu doesn’t reply beyond inclining his head, instead sweeping his eyes over Shen Yuan, who stands hilariously still like he’s facing down a predator, except for how the kid squints back a little at the Lord of Qing Jing Peak. Ha! That’s pretty fearless coming from someone still so unnerved by the man who would have Proud Immortal Demon Way’s most famous scum villain.

“Fu Qiang,” Shen Qingqiu says finally. “I have instructed Assistant Ma to set aside a private room for your discussion. You may take Disciple Shen there now.”

“Yes, Shizun.”

The other disciple gestures for Shen Yuan to follow and the other transmigrator hastily takes her up on that. As the disciples disappear, Shen Qingqiu rises and, without a word, leads Shang Qinghua into Yue Qingyuan’s office.

- 

AN: It’s tempting to try and make Shen Qingqiu and Shen Yuan actually develop more of a relationship than “passing acquaintance”, but the thing is that I can’t see either of them really going for it without being forced or without a very serious push. They’re both so prickly. 

- 

Yue Qingyuan greets him in a friendly manner, like he’s genuinely pleased to see Shang Qinghua and happy to help. Shang Qinghua greets the man in the same way. It’s nice! It also kind of feels like they’re both pretending the past few months of awkwardness, resentment, and avoidance never happened.

- 

AN: It felt a little more true to life and to the characters to have Shang Qinghua and Yue Qingyuan just... move forward instead of getting into their issues with each other and what apologies may be due. 

It’s kind of like a mutual: “What if we didn’t talk about it?” 

And they’re both like, “Oh, thank fuck.” 

I think that if they both brew on it a bit more, they may eventually decide to try to assuage their respective anger or guilt by saying something, but right now they’re feeling raw and/or embarrassed, and don’t want to accidentally get into it again. So they’ll talk about work! They always have work to talk about! Work is more important than personal matters, so they’re just going to pretend everything is fine! 

- 

It’s not just the System who won’t let the Immortal Alliance Conference not happen! But, ahhh, Shang Qinghua can still dream of them actually managing to convince Zhao Hua Temple Sect and everyone else to call the whole thing off. He can dream!

Yue Qingyuan has this pained expression that says, “You’re not wrong, but I wish you were.” This guy knows what Shang Qinghua is talking about!

Shen Qingqiu has this expression that says something like, “I can only critique the accuracy of your assessment on the grounds that you may be giving our fellow cultivators too much credit in terms of common sense and cooperation. This annoys me immensely.”

“You have put a great deal of thought into this,” Yue Qingyuan says finally. “You received this news… when exactly… again?”

“Ah, yesterday morning?” Shang Qinghua answers.

 “While in bed with a demon lord,” he doesn’t elaborate. Nope! Not elaborating!

“I know it’s not- I’ll try to get more information, but everyone is still in the planning stages, and it’s not easy getting any information!” Shang Qinghua says defensively. “But, even with that, I thought, ‘Ah, my shixiongs will probably want to know right away!’ Someone will need to tell Zhao Hua to take precautions, at least?”

Yue Qingyuan visibly regathers himself and says, “It is better to know these things as soon as possible. Thank you, Qinghua, for this forewarning.”

“He’s very good at knowing these things,” Shen Qingqiu agrees, but the man’s gaze is like a very sharp pin and Shang Qinghua is but a lowly insect under it. “When might you be expected to know more about this?”

“Ah, I’ll have to get in contact with… ah, some people I know.”

- 

AN: Of course YQY and SQQ want to know more about where SQH is getting this information, but for all they know he might just have gotten a tip-off from one of his merchant contacts or someone in the black market. This has been brewing for a while between these demon lords and the cultivation sects. It’s really bad news, but it’s also not really that surprising. 

According to the Airplane Extras, when MBJ and SQH meet, Airplane offhandedly mentions that Mobei-Jun’s clan and Huan Hua Palace Sect have a serious grudge from a conflict at a previous Immortal Alliance Conference. In PINTWILF, this conference is why the IACs got cancelled and had to be recently “revived”. The coming IAC is the 3rd since this revival.  

Shang Qinghua has proven himself reliable enough by this point that YQY and SQQ will let him keep his informants close to his chest. Between SQH’s years of improved services (helped by actually getting his personal disciples to help him) and SQH’s interference in their personal issues, they do actually trust him. 

So, yeah, they think he’s a squirmy little rat man. 

But he’s THEIR squirmy little rat man who has come through in times of need. Also, SQQ, for all his glaring, might stab YQY if he started giving SQH a hard time about this. Sometimes a shidi just wants you to back the fuck off, YQY! Let him have his secrets! Even though SQQ absolutely wants to know SQH’s secrets and is on the verge of dying of curiosity. 

I am VERY MUCH looking forward to them finding out that Shang Qinghua has a demon prince for a boyfriend. That’s going to be fun. 

- 

“I have also been… considering the advantages of lessons and between Peaks to encourage both cooperation and… survival skills,” Shen Qingqiu says next. “Rarely does one become a master of all disciplines - the Twelve Peaks allow for many of our sect to become specialists, masters of one art - but it seems unwise not to be learned in the basics of as many life-saving arts as one is able.”

“A diversity of learning can be very beneficial,” Yue Qingyuan agrees immediately.

“My disciple, Fu Qiang, has become a very adept medic over the years, though this was in the hopes of avoiding visiting Qian Cao Peak. The head disciples of An Ding, as I understand it, have sought to take special lessons from Qian Cao and Xian Shu to improve themselves."

 “Ah, that explains how Hongpeng spied on Peerless Cucumber back when the little bro was still in Mu Qingfang’s clutches,” Shang Qinghua thinks. “And, ah, Shen Bro, I don’t know how to tell you this, but Wenjiao goes to Xian Shu Peak mostly to moon over pretty girls, especially my little sister-in-law.”

"There is also the example of Qi-Shimei’s most frustrating disciple, who must be routinely dragged away from Bai Zhan, but who has also apparently helped to improve her fellow Xian Shu disciples’ martial abilities.”

 "Ah, that's one of putting Qi Qingqi letting Luo Fanli and Liu Mingyan fight each other in order to hopefully wear them both out," Shang Qinghua thinks.

“Even if demons should not attack, though only a limited number of our disciples will be attending the Immortal Alliance Conference, it would nevertheless be beneficial to ensure that all disciples across the sect are well-equipped to keep themselves alive until the specialists arrive,” Shen Qingqiu finishes. “Shang-Shidi, as one of the most well-connected leading members of our sect, the organization of such an initiative would be best left in your hands.”

- 

AN: Okay, so I know that this is kind of a weird thing to be coming from Shen Qingqiu, but he’s grown a bit over the course of this fic! AND he’s totally coming at it from the perspective of: “I don’t have to cooperate or get along with anyone beyond what I’m doing now.” 

So SQQ is like, “My disciples are stupid. We should have more field medics.” 

And he’s like, “Some people’s disciples can’t fight for shit and we should make sure they know more self-defense.” 

And he’s like, “Liu Qingge’s disciples are animals. Someone at least teach them how to protect other disciples and how to not bleed to death, because he won’t. That man doesn’t teach them anything.” 

And he’s like, “Shang Qinghua, you do that. I don’t want to.” 

- 

Peerless Cucumber’s conversation with Shen Qingqiu’s disciple is long over, but apparently his fellow transmigrator didn’t just leave afterwards. Yue Qingyuan’s youngest assistant intercepts to politely point Shang Qinghua towards their waiting room. Shen Yuan is asleep in a chair, with one of his cultivation manuals open in his lap. Judging by his pose, Shang Qinghua is going to guess that the kid was trying some kind of meditation and ended up taking a nap by accident.

It happens to the best of them sometimes! Or at least to Shang Qinghua!

“Ah, I told you not to wait on me. Come on, bro, I don’t want to have to carry you back,” Shang Qinghua says, while jostling the kid awake. “You’re too big for that. My nephew is too big for that these days. Just because it would be nostalgic for me and just because I can doesn’t mean that I want to be carrying you around like a sack of vegetables.”

- 

AN: If Shang Qinghua can haul Mobei-Jun around, then he could pick up Shen Yuan no problem. Also, this is the bit where I was like, “Wow, I have very much made SQH into SY’s dad here.” 

Even SVSSS SQH gives me Uncle Vibes, to be honest. The man wants to pop into Bingqiu’s life, ask some nosy questions, be treated to a free meal (who doesn’t), tell some bad jokes, offer some terrible advice, complain about his workload, and then flounce off again with his boyfriend. SVSSS SQH seems to like being useful and appreciated and part of the group, but in a way where he’s not directly attached to anyone, you know? Give SVSSS SQH the benefits, but none of the responsibilities! 

- 

Shang Qinghua is kind of sick of this roundabout conversation and decides to bring out the big guns: a move taught to him by his extremely powerful sister-in-law, who has effortlessly defeated their resident War God. He knows the effectiveness of this technique personally, because Luo Jiahui has used it to defeat him many times. He puts on the best concerned face he has.

“Yuan,” he says seriously, looking the kid directly in the eye. “I’m not making jokes here about not skipping out on cultivating. It’s not always going to be fun - a lot of the time, it’s going to be pretty embarrassing and a little painful. Bro, I was an adult stuck in a teenage body, regularly getting my ass handed to me by actual teenagers. That was awful. But I really need you to keep doing it, even if you don’t become the next War God ready to challenge the protagonist, because I don’t want you to die. This shitty world isn’t safe. And if you want to be involved in these missions, then I need you to be able to carry yourself, or we’re both going to get trampled by some OP monster wandering out of an advanced chapter early instead of fixing anything here.”

Shen Yuan is having difficulty meeting his eyes. He keeps trying to force himself to look at Shang Qinghua and then looking away again automatically.

Shang Qinghua employs another of his sister-in-law’s immensely powerful techniques: he reaches out and puts a hand on the kid’s shoulder. “I will tell you stuff when I have stuff to tell you and when I can tell it to you. You’ve been super helpful, I’m going to need your help in the future, but I need you to be a little patient right now too.”

Shen Yuan nods. “...Fine.”

-

AN: Shang Qinghua: “I can’t believe that I’m tricking this person into thinking I’m a good person by being nice to them and looking after them and doing good things. I have learned this behavior for TRICKING PURPOSES only and have NOT accidentally adopted yet another kid.” 

- 

Shang Qinghua can’t answer the question right now! Leave a message!

He’s too busy replaying all the times he’s seen his nephew and his fellow transmigrator interact. Binghe did ask after Shen Yuan every time that he and Shang Qinghua talked, while the other transmigrator was on Qian Cao and after he came to An Ding, but… Shang Qinghua just thought his nephew was being polite and curious? Peerless Cucumber stands out! Binghe didn’t act too weirdly about it!

Luo Binghe is supposed to be a stallion protagonist with 600 wives!

Although… Shang Qinghua’s nephew has never really shown any interest in that kind of thing. Which Shang Qinghua has been pretty glad about! He doesn’t want to have 600 nieces-in-law! He also doesn’t want that for his nephew!

The protagonist of Proud Immortal Demon Way ’s harem was basically a snake pit of drama and desperation and decaying fantasies. For everyone who could read between the lines of empty papapa to see Airplane Shooting Towards The Sky’s tragic story of resentment and revenge, it wouldn’t be inaccurate to say the tyrannical, broken protagonist was like a black hole, dragging everyone else into orbit around this man who couldn’t really love anyone! You can take a blackened protagonist out of the Eternal Abyss, but you can’t take that abyss out of the blackened protagonist, right?

The original Luo Binghe didn’t take wives because he was in love. He took wives because he could! Because they were beautiful or powerful or useful! Because he pitied them! Because he liked being their savior! Because he didn't want anyone else to have them! Because he liked being an object of envy and desire and love! Because it was expected of him, as the man all the readers wanted to be, who was supposed to have everything a man could ever want!

 “...Ah, there are… some implications there,” Airplane Shooting Towards The Sky realizes, remembering just how half-hearted most of that harem bullshit was. “Maybe a bent man wrote a kind of bent protagonist by accident? Who knows?”

“Da-Ge?” Fanli says. “Da-Ge, didn’t you know?”

- 

AN: I’ve said this before, but there’s a meta argument to be made in regards to Luo Binghe and obligatory heterosexuality. 

Also, from what I remember, Airplane didn’t actually seem to care too much about Luo Binghe being interested in Shen Yuan. In the Airplane Extras, Airplane says that in the original version of PIDW that he never got to write, Luo Binghe actually ended up totally alone at the end of the story. He was apparently planning a pretty downer ending for Luo Binghe. But Luo Binghe ended up getting a huge harem instead because that’s what the readers wanted! 

So, my impression is, that when SVSSS Airplane first realizes that LBH is into men (and into SQQ specifically), he does a little bit of self-reflection and also reflection on PIDW, then just goes, “Huh. That makes... sense.” 

- 

“Though, aha, I can’t remember Shen-Shixiong ever really not being kind of angry at me and I’m not dead yet. I had to talk really fast sometimes, but I lived! Now go away.”

When Shang Qinghua looks up, all of his disciples are staring at him. They all look surprised, except for Shen Yuan, who looks embarrassed. Shang Qinghua would guess that someone cracked a dirty joke, but that doesn’t seem right.

"What?"

“...Shifu, how long have you known Shen-Shibo?” Chen Xuan asks.

“Since we were disciples? Ah, I think he hated me at first sight.”

“But you’re close now?” Lin Wenjiao blurts out.

“Closer, ” Shang Qinghua agrees warily. “Aha, don’t think that any of you can ask me for favors to do with Shen Qingqiu or Qing Jing Peak too! That’s not happening! Disciple Luo, Shen, get out of here before you give my disciples any more weird ideas.”

- 

AN: Okay, so what happened is that as soon as Luo Fanli and Shang Qinghua left the room, Shen Yuan was like, “...Shang Qinghua and Shen Qingqiu are... very close? Are they...?” 

And SQH’s disciples are like, “Holy shit, are you asking if SQH and SQQ are romantically involved?!” And SQH’s disciples laugh in SY’s face because that’s RIDICULOUS. Which makes SY really embarrassed and defensive! SQH’s disciples ask why he would EVER think a thing like that. 

SY provides the evidence. It’s a reasonable conclusion! 

And then SQH’s disciples are like, “...Holy shit?!” 

And then SY is like, “Wait, maybe I shouldn’t have mentioned that.” 

But it’s too late. SQH’s disciples are already putting all the evidence together and there is SO MUCH EVIDENCE of something going on there. 

I know I refer to this ship as “Shangjiu”, but that’s mostly just to specify which Shen Qingqiu and I doubt that anyone in Cang Qiong Mountain Sect dares to call SQQ “Jiu” besides YQY. They’d probably actually end up calling it something along the lines of “The Premise” like original Star Trek: The Original Series Kirk/Spock shippers. (See Fanlore or something for more info on that.) 

Again, SQH cannot... CONCEIVE of them conceiving this idea. 

-

By the time that Mobei-Jun shows up at his Leisure House, Shang Qinghua is a little on the edge! Honestly, he’s kind of off the edge, dangling from a very thin branch just underneath the cliff’s edge, and that thin branch is making some very concerning noises! Sure, at least the demon lord isn’t late, but Shang Qinghua is suddenly reminded of just how intimidating Mobei-Jun looks! Also, he’s cleaned up his house and knows his sister-in-law knows he’s kind of a slob sometimes, but he’s so sure that she’s still going to judge his cleaning job! What if she blames Mobei-Jun for it? (She’d be right to blame him a little! The man can be kind of lazy and messy sometimes too!)

A cool hand at Shang Qinghua’s hip prevents him from walking around in circles, repositioning disobedient cushions and offending tables. Shang Qinghua looks up at Mobei-Jun, who moves his hand to where Shang Qinghua’s neck meets shoulder.

“Stop it,” Mobei-Jun says.

- 

AN: It’s really funny thinking about how all of Mobei-Jun’s gentle and affectionate behaviors towards SQH are totally learned. This does not come naturally to the man. If SQH was having a panic attack, Mobei-Jun’s first (panicked) instinct would be to bark at him to stop it. 

- 

“It’s just… Jiahui is… it didn’t have to be this way for us? I would have just helped her get to safety and left her to live her life without me, but she didn’t let that happen, even though her family wasn’t any good either, so why would she want another one?” Shang Qinghua tries to explain. “She chose me? She looked out for me. She helped me understand a lot of things. Even though she probably could have picked anyone else. I don’t really know where I’d be right now if she didn’t? Ah, probably… not talking to or trusting anyone ever? You remember what things used to be like.”

“Yes.”

“I’ve never really liked any of the sisters I’ve had before very much,” Shang Qinghua admits. “Ah, but they didn’t like me either, so it worked. Anyway! It’s… important to me that things work out now because…”

 “I don’t want to choose,” Shang Qinghua doesn’t say.

He clears his throat instead.

“Qinghua.”

Shang Qinghua forces himself to look up from his hands on Mobei-Jun’s collar.

“I am glad that you were not without someone to trust,” Mobei-Jun says, though it sounds like it takes effort. “Your sister has nothing to fear from me.”

Mobei-Jun has already made this promise, but it’s good to hear it again.

“Thank you, my king. I’ll, ah- I should go get her now.”

-

AN: Mobei-Jun is jealous. He is very, VERY jealous. 

BUT Mobei-Jun can also see some parallels here. Luo Jiahui is to Shang Qinghua in many ways what Shang Qinghua is to him. Mobei-Jun understands the importance of this relationship and of this person. He understands that Jiahui and SQH’s relationship is not romantic, of course, and understands her to be the “head of the family”, so he has to force himself not to act on his jealousy. 

I think that a part of Mobei-Jun might see jealousy as something very negative? Thinking about what I said about Mobei-Jun’s hang-ups surrounding consent and possessiveness possibly originating with his father being a wife-stealer, Mobei-Jun can’t act on his jealousy for the same reasons that he needs Shang Qinghua to make the first explicit moves. He wants Shang Qinghua to choose him and to choose him of his own free will. 

So, he’s jealous when he hears about how LJH chose SQH and SQH chose LJH, but he can’t act on it because 1) he loves SQH and 2) he’s (possibly unconsciously) terrified of becoming his father and creating resentment that will ripple out into his family potentially for generations. 

- 

It’s so, so weird to see his human sister-in-law sitting across from a demon lord. Luo Jiahui is not a tall woman and her cultivation is very good these days, but she’s not a warrior. Seeing the height and width differences side-by-side make them really obvious! Mobei-Jun is at least twice Shang Qinghua’s sister-in-law’s size! He has to be easily twice her weight!

When Luo Jiahui puts food in front of Mobei-Jun, Shang Qinghua gets huge “I dare you to not eat my food” messages! It took a really long time before Mobei-Jun seemed to accept that Shang Qinghua really wouldn’t take every available opportunity to hand him poison. Thankfully, however, Mobei-Jun has eaten Luo Jiahui’s food before! Shang Qinghua has shared his sister-in-law's food with the demon lord! Shang Qinghua also communicated beforehand that Mobei-Jun has to eat the food. No matter what!

So, Mobei-Jun eats the food and Shang Qinghua breathes a sigh of relief. Mobei-Jun even goes so far as to tell Luo Jiahui that she’s a good cook (above and beyond social interaction! Also delivered kind of awkwardly!), which his sister-in-law accepts with thanks (and also maybe just a little bit as her rightful due).

Luo Jiahui already knows the basics of Mobei-Jun: that he’s an ice demon, the son of the Northern Demon King, and he’s going to be the next Northern Demon King. She already knows that he’s a warrior and that his time is mostly spent tending to his duties, usually on his father’s behalf. She even knows that demon families can be kind of violently competitive and that Mobei-Jun’s family is no exception.

So, when she finally decides to speak seriously, she says, “My brother is very important to me. I have told him that if he is happy, then I’m happy for him. He has told me that you are very important to him.”

- 

AN: Mobei-Jun is going to hold that revelation close to his chest for WEEKS. Shang Qinghua said that Mobei-Jun is very important to him! 

Juggling the tension of this scene was weird. 

Because, like, Mobei-Jun is not a kind or a gentle or a good person. He’s disdainful of humanity. It’s kind of a mindfuck for him to be having a meal with a strange human who is not of the things he has been raised to respect. 

Meanwhile, Luo Jiahui is fucking terrified of Mobei-Jun, dislikes him, and doesn’t want to like him. He’s a stranger who could destroy her family. He looks kind of monstrous. He acts strangely. 

But they HAVE TO BE CIVIL to each other for Shang Qinghua’s sake. 

So they are. 

Mobei-Jun tries not to make any scary moves around the soft human. 

Luo Jiahui tries to act like MBJ is a normal person and to be polite. 

They are both very out of their depth. 

- 

“...Shang Qinghua saved my life,” Mobei-Jun says, which is the first time he’s spoken without someone else speaking to him first. “Many times, he has done this.”

Luo Jiahui sets down her teacup, listening expectantly.

“Even when I did not trust him, and he did not trust me, Qinghua has always provided shelter and safety,” Mobei-Jun says slowly, solemnly. “Medicine, when I have been injured. Direction, when I have been lost. Company and loyalty. This is rare.”

“Yes,” Luo Jiahui agrees.

“The trust I have put in him has never been betrayed.”

Shang Qinghua kind of feels like he’s overheating here - like maybe his heart is melting! Mobei-Jun as a character has always prized loyalty above all! “I had no fucking clue,” he thinks. “Honestly, how the FUCK did I have no fucking clue?! Hindsight is incredible!”

“I would not betray him,” Mobei-Jun says, looking to Shang Qinghua directly. “My life has been his since the day we met.”

Shang Qinghua tries not to melt even more. Mobei-Jun is supposed to be an ice demon! What the hell is this?! It’s unfair! It’s embarrassing! It’s too much!

“...Good,” Luo Jiahui says, determinedly. “I’m happy to hear that. My hard-working brother needs someone to appreciate and cherish him.”

“Yes.”

- 

AN: Mobei-Jun is like, “Humans use words. I need to use words. I need to be direct about this because humans are bad at understanding things.” 

And Luo Jiahui is like, “Oh my, you are very intense. Okay.” 

- 

Mobei-Jun nods. “I did not think a human would ever care for a demon child.”

Luo Jiahui frowns a little. “Oh?”

“I admire this,” Mobei-Jun amends, frowning back. “I do not know how humans are raised. It is good that your child has never had to doubt his safety here.”

“...Of course.”

“It is clear that your child is loved beyond his bloodline.”

“Of course,” Luo Jiahui insists, with an offended note in her voice. “When I found Binghe in that river, I didn’t know he was part demon, but I would have taken him in anyway! Whoever the parent is, whatever the parent has done, it’s never the baby’s fault. Even if a parent has done something wrong, then babies shouldn’t suffer for it. All children should be cherished.”

Luo Jiahui’s voice breaks a little, her eyes turning wet. Shang Qinghua fumbles for a handkerchief to offer his sister-in-law, which she accepts gratefully.

He wonders if she’s thinking about her stillborn baby. She doesn’t talk about her other baby very often, but she does sometimes. She told him once that she observes that day. It’s something that she insists on doing alone.

“...I was left in the human world as a young child,” Mobei-Jun says.

Shang Qinghua’s head snaps up. He knows that, but that’s because he wrote that. He has never, ever heard Mobei-Jun talk about it before.

“Oh, no,” Luo Jiahui says.

“I was nearly killed by humans,” Mobei-Jun informs them.

“Oh, I’m so sorry,” Luo Jiahui says.

“It was my uncle’s doing. He wishes to see me dead.” Mobei-Jun says this like it’s just another fact of life, not even an upsetting one, which kind of makes it one of the saddest fucking things that Shang Qinghua has ever heard the man say.

“That’s terrible,” Luo Jiahui says vehemently. “How rotten.”

Mobei-Jun blinks at her. His expression is still solemn, but the pause seems surprised.

Shang Qinghua almost wants to shrug. Yep, his sister-in-law is just like this!

“I have promised Qinghua that I will protect your son,” Mobei-Jun says to her. “I make you the same promise now.”

“...Thank you.”

- 

AN: Mobei-Jun is like, “I understand you to be one of the rare humans who is not a piece of shit and who would have saved me as a child. I respect this. I don’t fucking understand it, but I understand you should be protected and that your child should be protected. I am doing this for Shang Qinghua and not because I have any personal issues surrounding the endangerment of demon children.” 

Luo Jiahui is like, “Oh, he’s soft inside! He’ll protect my Binghe. Okay, I like him now. I didn’t want to, but anyone who basically professes to be willing to die for my child and my brother has my reluctant approval.” 

- 

Shang Qinghua can’t help it. The energy in here is so weird! He laughs.

“My king, have you had that all this time?”

Mobei-Jun doesn’t say anything, he just frowns.

“Clearly he was waiting to return it in person, Houhua,” Luo Jiahui admonishes. “It’s not his fault that you took so long introducing us or surely he would have returned it sooner. Don’t make it out to be impolite.”

Mobei-Jun gives Shang Qinghua’s sister-in-law an approving look.

- 

AN: Mobei-Jun is like, “Oh, she’s smarter than Qinghua. Good. (Not that my Shang Qinghua isn’t very clever, but he’s an idiot.)” 

- 

And sometimes it’s just nice to take a minute to sit back, relax, and see his disciples daring their shidi, his fellow transmigrator, to chug the spiciest soup on the menu.

“Ah, kids,” Shang Qinghua says to Luo Jiahui.

Luo Jiahui is making a very concerned expression as her sisters, Shang Qinghua’s head disciples, and even Liu Mingyan chant: “Chug! Chug! Chug!” Yeah, he should probably stop them! But why would he? If anyone throws up from this, he’ll just appear out of nowhere to scare the shit out of all of them and then make them clean it up. It’s fine. He says as much to Luo Jiahui.

“They’re old enough to know better,” she says, but she looks fond now. “Their shifu should have taught them better manners, hm?”

“Hey! Only… four of those are mine.”

- 

AN: Friends for Shen Yuan! Friends for Shen Yuan! 

Also SQH being like, “Oh, fuck, I really have too many kids.” 

- 

Luo Jiahui sighs wistfully. “It is nice having children in here again, even big ones who are supposed to be adults now. I’m so proud of how Binghe has grown, but I miss when he was little. I miss when I could pick him up and carry him around. Uncle Han’s daughter brought her new baby in yesterday. He was so cute!”

“Aha, don’t steal a baby to fill the empty nest, please!”

Luo Jiahui swats him. “I wouldn’t do something like that!” she insists, cheeks flushing pink.

- 

AN: Baby?! Baby for Luo Jiahui and Liu Qingge?! Maybe!