#so i still feel hesitant about trying again tbh :'^)

[guiltyasdave]

28 "No one ever cared about me like you." for Joel or Marcus Pike, please?? Thank you for writing all this amazing stuff for us <3

no one can hurt you now

pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader

word count: ~1.2k

summary: You’ve been traveling through the country with Joel and Ellie. After finally arriving in the safety of Jackson, you realize how much Joel means to you.

tags/warnings: post outbreak, mentions of infected, fighting and blood, reader doesn’t value her life that much tbh, angst, anxiety, comfort, able-bodied reader, no use of y/n (please let me know if i missed something <3)

a/n: dearest anon, thank you so much for your kind words and for sending this prompt in! this started out as a drabble but got out of control, so i hope you enjoy this little fic 🫶🏻

dividers by @saradika-graphics who is amazing <3

full masterlist here / follow @guiltyasdavenotifs and turn on notifications for fic updates!

The clicker’s teeth snap at you inches away from your face, your arms straining desperately to hold the creature off. A shot rings through the air and the clicker stills as blood splatters across your face.

You push the now lifeless weight off of you and try to stand back up, your shaky legs underneath you barely cooperating.

“Thanks,” you mutter, gasping for breath.

“The fuck was that?” Joel barks, the gun still grasped so tightly in his hand that his knuckles are turning white.

“It was- running at Ellie, I just-“

You’ll admit that you hadn’t really thought it through when you lunged at the clicker that had charged in the girl’s direction without any weapons in your hands. Not her, had been the only clear thought in your head. She wasn’t replaceable.

You were.

“You just what? Thought you’d get yourself killed?”

“No! I don’t know, okay? I still bought us time, and you got it, so-”

You don’t like the way he’s glaring at you, like you did something fundamentally wrong. You took a risk, yes, but his main objective is taking the girl across the country. You’re just… there.

“So?! Fuckin’ stupid, is what it was,” he snaps before he turns around abruptly and stomps further into the abandoned house that you’re hoping to spend the night in. You wait until your legs finally stop trembling before you follow him.

It’s the middle of the night when Joel finally speaks to you again. You had settled down in one of the bedrooms on the upper floor, not before searching the house extra thoroughly after the clicker incident earlier.

You can hear Ellie’s soft snores from across the room and you would have sworn that Joel was asleep too. Your mind didn’t rest, replaying the scene over and over, the way Joel snapped at you making your chest hurt each time.

“You don’t get to not make yourself a priority, you hear me? I won’t let you.”

You flinch at the unexpected sound from his corner of the room, but his voice is gentle, like he’s approaching a scared animal.

“But Ellie-” you still try to protest.

“I care about Ellie just as much as you do.” He hesitates for a second. “But I also care about you.”

You feel heat flushing your cheeks and you avert your gaze, even though it’s too dark for him to see your face anyway.

“You shouldn’t,” you mutter, “she’s the one that matters.”

“So do you,” he grumbles.

“Not like her.”

He heaves a sigh and you hear him moving closer to you in the darkness.

“Listen to me.” His tone is gruff, but you can feel the intensity behind his words. “I couldn’t- shit, I couldn’t do this alone. Just take care of yourself. Don’t be stupid. Okay?”

“Okay,” you agree in a hushed voice.

You know that this is the closest that Joel Miller will ever get to admitting that he doesn’t hate you. You try to fight the feeling, but warmth is spreading through your chest at the thought that he actually wants you around, that he’s not just letting you tag along because he doesn’t know what else to do with you.

It’s your first real night in Jackson, the first time that you’ve arrived at a place and didn’t immediately make plans on where to go next. The first night that you’re spending in a real bed in god knows how long. The first night that you don’t have to sleep with one eye open, always waiting for the next danger to find you.

And the first night in a bed with Joel. Neither of you had protested when you were assigned to one house with him and Ellie. You know what Joel and you look like, from the outside. You don’t think that you care, not really.

The house has three bedrooms anyway, so it didn’t matter. At least that’s what you thought, until you had all said good night to each other and you were lying alone in the darkness, wide eyes staring up at the dark ceiling, as you were trying to stop the anxious shivers running through your body.

It was too quiet, the mattress too soft, the room too… empty. You had gotten used to the steady breathing of two other people around you, and now that they weren’t in the room with you, everything felt wrong. What if you woke up tomorrow to find them both dead, to find yourself alone in the world once more? How were you supposed to make sure they were safe when you weren’t with them?

Before you could overthink it, you got up, checked on Ellie who was sleeping soundly and padded over to the room Joel was in.

“Can’t sleep?” his low drawl had greeted you as soon as you cracked the door open.

You wordlessly shook your head and he sighed.

“Me neither. Doesn’t feel right like this, does it?”

That’s how you ended up under the covers next to him. No touching of course, both of you keeping a firm distance. This was just so you could both catch some sleep. Just for tonight.

Except that you’re still not able to let sleep drag you under. Your body is tense, acutely aware of his presence next to you, his body heat easily traveling the short distance between you. You could bridge it just as easily, just reach your hand out to - do what, exactly?

You huff out a breath and turn onto your side, shuffling the sheets with your movement.

“What’s wrong?”

His voice is barely above a whisper and before you can open your mouth to respond, his fingers find your face and graze over your cheek in a barely there contact.

He had touched you before, of course, checking you for injuries, soothing you with a hand on your arm or a brush over your hair, but never like this. Never in the darkness of the night and never when you could sense the tension in the air between you, could almost feel his breath on your face. You have never been so acutely aware of the warmth of his fingers that’s seeping into your skin right now.

“I just- I never thanked you for taking me here, for taking care of me.”

It’s not what’s on the forefront of your mind, not the thing that’s plaguing you in this moment, but it’s still true, and much easier than admitting to him that feeling his body so close right next to yours has you practically burning up, has your fingers itching to touch him, to breathe him in.

Joel hums.

“You don’t have to. Of course I did that.”

You try swallowing the lump that suddenly builds in your throat.

“No one ever cared about me like you,” you admit in a whisper.

“Hey,” Joel mumbles, alarmed at the thickness of unshed tears in your voice, “come here, sweetheart.”

Both of his arms reach towards you and his hands splay over your shoulders to pull you into his chest. His warmth engulfs you and you feel the tension in your body subsiding as you’re resting your head over his steady heartbeat.

“We’re safe now,” he whispers into your hair. “I’ll always keep you safe.”

if you liked this, please consider leaving a comment or reblogging - nothing would make me happier 🤍

[lyneira]

♡ "you're so handsome" ♡

-> how the genshin impact men react when you call them handsome

Knows it

Kaeya, Heizou, Childe, Lyney

This guy has 100% confidence in himself and has likely already heard it from others, so he'd probably give you a smug grin and say, "I know, thanks". Don't be instantly dismayed though, he still appreciates the comment more than you may think.

Having the compliment come from your mouth is worth much more to him than hearing it from anybody else or even himself. He may be confident in himself, but he also cares about you and about what you think of him. Hearing you say that he's handsome out loud eases him and makes him feel content.

He'd still act cheeky though, saying a comment like, "you're not too bad looking yourself, either", winking, then giving you a playful kiss.

Wants you to tell him that everyday

Itto, Venti, Kaveh

You've awakened something in him, and now he needs to hear those words everyday. He'll be just like a puppy. He'll melt if you suddenly hold his face with both hands and ask, "who's the most handsome in all of Teyvat?", and watch as his eyes brim with excitement and love, "ME. IT'S ME!!" And if you forget to tell him, he won't hesitate to remind you

"Y/N, tell me again- Who am I?"

Initially, you'll be like ???, but then realize what he's trying to get at

"You're my handsome guy"

"YESSSS" and he'll get excited all over again, just as the first time, and pull you into the biggest hug.

Gives a simple "thank you"

Cyno, Albedo, Wriothesley, Tighnari

They'll say thank you, seemingly nonchalantly, but he'll hold onto that compliment for the rest of the day...or week...or month...they'll hold on to that compliment forever, really. Your words will replay in their mind, 'they called me handsome', and he'll feel so warm inside.

Returns the compliment

Ayato, Neuvillette, Zhongli, Thoma, Baizhu, Kazuha

It will actually take him by surprise a bit. He wasn't expecting to be complimented, but the gesture warms his heart, especially since it's coming from his beloved. He'll smile at you, bringing up a hand to hold the side of your face, "And you're beautiful, my dear", before giving you a kiss, "a kiss for my beautiful one"

Doesn't really care

Alhaitham, Dainsleif, Diluc

I get a sense that these guys don't care about looks at all, so the compliment wouldn't produce a big reaction from them tbh. Then again, it reassures him of how you adore him and find him attractive, so he'll show his gratitude maybe by patting your head, giving you a quick kiss, and saying a quick "thanks"

Gets flustered

Xiao, Gorou, Scaramouche

A light blush will appear on their cheeks the moment you tell them that. They're not used to being complimented like that after all. but they feel good about it.

"Well, thanks...I guess", is all they can make out in response because he's too busy processing these new, mushy feelings whenever you compliment him.

a/n: some of these felt a bit repetitive and some of them felt like they were miscategorized or mischaracterized tbh 🥲 I'm kinda rusty, but I've had this in my drafts since last year so I thought that I might as well finish it lol

© 2023 lyneira. PLEASE DO NOT COPY, PLAGIARIZE, OR REPOST MY WRITING ONTO OTHER PLATFORMS

[thebearer]

the idea of you and carmy both being pretty inexperienced and figuring it all out together is so !!! to me. like it’s shy and sweet and nonjudgmental and you both just feel so safe with each other. i can just imagine telling him that you’re insecure about being inexperienced and he’s so sweet but so confused?? and he’s just like?? why would i care about that??

so non-judgmental and just sorta freeing?? getting to explore each others interest and turn ons like that. carmen, genuinely, it would take some coercing for him. just bc he’d be so anxious, so worried that he’d be “lesser than” for not being experienced. then when he finds out you’re the same way??? it’s over. he’s in love. LOVE.

he’s so shy but i know he’d be a freak in the sheets once he got with the right one. someone he felt comfortable with who built up his confidence. he’d only aim to please. he’d get so good at fucking you the way you liked, and would be mind blown and in love at how you do it to him.

love this trope tbh. picturing giggly, kinda nervous, kinda shy sex at the beginning. a lot of:

“that? that felt good? yeah?” carmen looks up from between your thighs, eyes rounded so sweetly you want to squeeze his cheeks. you nod, instead, giving him a grin that he returns.

and some of this:

“did i do that right?” you squeak, watching carmen carefully.

“fuck, yes. yes you-you did it right.” carmen’s arm thrown over his eyes, chest blushed and heaving, trying to catch his breath coming down from his high.

and some:

“do you wanna try this position maybe?” you flash your phone at carmen, the illustrated depiction shining towards him. “could be interesting?”

“yeah that one looks fun. let’s try that.” carmen’s trying to keep his voice level and even, not blush and show his flusteredness at the casual sex talk. it was new to him but comforting, being able to talk so intimately with you.

sometimes the position worked, exceeding your expectations. you’d mark it a success, both of you adding it to your own mental lists of favorites to try again later, becoming more and more natural with it over time.

sometimes it was a fail. uncomfortable, harder than it looked like, or just not for you.

“are you- do you want me to stop?” you look over your shoulder, hips stilling on top of carmen.

“what? n-no. sorry, i was- sorry.” carmen blushes, heat spilling down his chest. you were on top of him, riding him deliciously, yet, he still found himself fidgeting- unsettled, uncomfortable, just not feeling right.

“am i hurting you?” you started to lift, carmen groaning at the loss of you around him.

“no, fuck no. it’s just-“ carmen hesitated, mind foggy from the feeling of being inside you, racing with worry. “i think i like it better when… you know, when you’re lookin’ at me.” carmen muttered. “i just- i dunno, i’d rather see you than just your back. not- i didn’t mean it like that. i-i meant- i just-“

you smile, adjusting yourself carefully, legs swinging and turning until you’re straddling carmen again, this time facing him. “i get it. i wasn’t crazy about it either. i don’t like not being able to see you.”

“yeah. you-you didn’t either?” carmen swallowed, trying to still his hips, feeling you still around him.

you shook your head lightly. “no it felt… impersonal? is that the right word?” you giggled.

carmen laughed with you, soft and sweet, a little airy. “i dunno but this,” his hands found yours hips, squeezing them gently. “feels better already.”

carmen’s a reverse cowgirl hater idk what to tell you??

[baelabong]

ʙᴀᴄᴋꜱᴛᴀɢᴇ

(ɢ!ᴘ ᴄʜᴀᴇᴡᴏɴ x ᴍᴀᴋᴇᴜᴘ!ᴀʀᴛɪꜱᴛ!ꜰᴇᴍ!ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ)

plot: being chaewon’s personal makeup artist came with its perks

notes/warnings: smur, g!p, p in v, cumming in p, riding-ish, not much plot tbh

waiting for u @1luvkarina 🫣🫣

chaewon sat on the edge of the chair, her leg bouncing slightly as she watched you lay out your makeup kit. her eyes locked onto your every movement, filled with urgency. “please, y/n,” she said, her voice low but trembling, “i need you. just a little, before the show.”

you glanced over, smirking as you grabbed a brush. “fine, but you need to sit still. no moving while i do this,” you replied, your tone teasing but firm. “come on, get in the chair.”

without hesitation, chaewon slid off her skirt and briefs, her hands trembling a little from the rush. she sat back down, her hard cock already throbbing with need. you noticed how her chest rose and fell quickly, showing just how desperate she was.

you pushed your panties aside and moved closer, the cool air hitting your bare skin. with a quick shift of your hips, you pressed yourself against her length, earning a sharp hiss from chaewon. her precum smeared against your thighs as her eyes darted up to meet yours. the heat between you was palpable, an unspoken urgency hanging in the air.

straddling her, you slowly sank down, feeling her stretch you. your breath hitched as the pressure built, and chaewon gasped, her grip on the chair tightening. “god, you’re so tight,” she muttered, her voice thick with lust.

you grabbed her chin, forcing her to look at you. “keep your eyes on me, or i won’t move,” you commanded, though your voice softened with need. she nodded, her eyes wide, pleading.

“p-please move,” she whispered, her voice barely holding steady. you could feel her fingers digging into your waist, her body trembling beneath you as you started moving, slowly at first. you built a steady rhythm, watching her chest rise and fall faster with each thrust.

you reached over for your makeup brushes, not breaking your stride. your hips rocked against her as you dabbed foundation onto her flushed cheeks. chaewon let out a moan, trying to keep her composure as you continued riding her.

“you look so beautiful,” you whispered, your breath catching as you stared at her. her lip quivered, trying to hold back another moan, but her eyes screamed with need.

just as she was about to lose herself, you stopped. her hips bucked up instinctively, a frustrated whine escaping her lips. “please, don’t stop,” she begged, her eyes full of desperation.

you chuckled, brushing a lock of her hair back. “you have to be quiet, or i will,” you teased, your words sharp but playful. chaewon bit her lip, nodding quickly.

the sound of footsteps outside made you both freeze. “chaewon, you’re on stage in five!” the manager’s voice rang out, muffled through the door. chaewon’s eyes widened in panic, but her body still craved more, torn between the show and you.

“we’ve got time,” you whispered, resuming your pace, faster now. her breath came out in short gasps, her hands gripping your waist as you rode her harder, pushing both of you closer to the edge.

chaewon’s breath hitched again, her body trembling. “i’m so close,” she gasped, barely holding on. you leaned in, your lips brushing her ear.

“let go for me, just focus on this,” you whispered, your own body aching for release. chaewon’s grip tightened as you sped up, riding her with everything you had. her breathy moans filled the room, louder and more desperate.

the door knocked again, louder this time. “chaewon, now!”

but she didn’t care. with one final thrust, chaewon came, her body convulsing as she gripped you tighter. her release was hot and overwhelming, and you followed her over the edge, collapsing onto her, breathless and shaking.

you slowly lifted yourself off her, watching as her cum dripped down between you. chaewon’s chest heaved as she tried to catch her breath, her cheeks flushed. she smiled up at you, her eyes still full of lingering desire.

“well, that was cutting it close,” you said, grinning down at her as you reached for the makeup brush again.

chaewon laughed softly, still catching her breath. “totally worth it.”

[qtkoshi]

Maybe gn!Reader and Hobie adopt a kitten and the other three (Pavitr, Gwen, and Miles) come to see the kitten? Maybe a orange kitten gn!Reader wanted to name Spunk or Spike while Hobie gave them a spike collar? Would be cute lol

i luv ur brain anon

"you got....a kitten?"

- ok ok idk if this is what u meant, but u can feel free to run this with the bubblegum reader + hobie bc i think it fits alright :-) - also get a little deep with describing relationship,, but it’s necessary for the plot ! (...) - also!!! tysm for the requests; i am very excited to get into them, but will prob wait till tmrw to release bc it is my birthday today <3 much love to you all

──★ ˙ ̟ to the stars ！

general headcannons

alright first of all: hobie with a kitten? i’m in tears. 

i love the hc that hobie has a soft spot for cats and the fact that y’all got one together? bye.

NAPS WITH THE KITTEN JUST NESTLED BETWEEN BOTH OF YOU

this cat is gonna be SPOILED in attention i tell u rn

hobie isn’t as obvious ab it as u, but the amount of times u see him chilling with the cat just perched on his shoulder?? (why are u taking the baby swinging across the city hobie; wait a min now–)

how u got him

imagine this: ur walking past an alley and hear this small little meow; after further investigation you find this tuft of orange fur crying outside the dumpster and

now u gotta take it in what r u talking about!!

bringing him home immediately ; hobie's spidey senses prob picked up the cat's presence before you got in the door.

'baby what's that.' 'c'mon spiderman we got saving to do'

man can't even argue with you

hobie not naming the cat himself bc he doesn’t wanna enforce socio-constructed labels on an unsuspecting creature that can’t consent

u can tho.

and while you very much want to, you tell hobie you gotta think on it for a bit – it has to fit just right!! (tbh he rlly doesn’t mind the cat being nameless, but he’s kinda whipped and will kinda go with what u want if it helps give that pretty lil smile to him again)

spider-squad finding out ab him

the besties r wrapping up something with a fight and hobie’s all k gotta leave and check on the cat and the rest are like ????? 

pav absolutely floored bc how dare did u not mention this sooner hobie

'so you lot wanna come see him?' (inter-dimensional travel ensues) – also never gonna complain ab coming to hobie’s house they all think his place is dope

i’m sure we all know orange cats are fucking crazy and that does not exclude the little gremlin jumping off the walls of your flat rn

hobie ofc is smirking bc his son the cat is a little agent of chaos and he couldn’t be more proud 

you, on the other hand, are just a little tired trying to get the fucker to stay still for a second so u can put on the damn flea medicine

everybody loves him are u kidding (miles a little hesitant tho, he still has beef with the last spiderman-variant cat he met :/ ) 

“so whats its name?” miles was watching with wary eyes as the little ball of fur darted around. with a heavy (and definitely not dramatic) sigh, you walk over to the group “still haven’t picked. we just found him yesterday.”

luv the idea of hobie looking at u anytime ur in the room (stay with me now) — can’t help it u just grab all his attention, maybe stop being so lovely idk

speaking of your relationship: he has spent years battering against everything life throws at him that having your love in the palm of his hands? something to protect not in the way he does as a hero, but in the way to cherish as a person?? give the man a break, he deserves to admire you whenever he can.

anyways hobie’s looking at you before going ‘oh yea’, just grunts and pulls out this little collar with little spikes and their matching and oh my that is so cute

says he found it in some garbage, most def made the collar with some scraps like he did his own (gotta keep it cool yk)

you giddy and putting the collar on the little heathen and just all ‘omg wait a min’

promptly lifting the cat up and “THIS IS SPIKE.”

cue golf claps from the squad with some ooo’s and aah’s

more gen headcannons

remember when hobie and the cat were swinging around the city? yea he's taking that mf everywhere. puts him in his pocket like a little surprise

hobie loves to play fight with the cat

spike is the perfect mix; got hobie’s energy and your brightness it’s a win-win

i could write more but i'll stop here for now 🕸️

⊗

[murdrdocs]

been thinking about luke fucking you on the beach in the sand tbh - like you’re whining about the sand on your back and he grips your jaw and forces your mouth open with his thumb so that he can spit in your mouth 😳🤭

cw spitting; MDNI

you're trying your hardest to enjoy the rock of luke's hips against yours.

it's a perfect scene to revel in it. with nothing but the soft chirp of birds and the soothing crash of waves against the shore a little ways away creating the perfect background noise, an amplifier for the soft and pretty grunts coming from luke's lips.

it's supposed to be romantic. maybe. at least you think that's what luke was going for. but any possible romanticism is lost along the sand grating at your back, exfoliating your skin in a way you would've appreciated if it weren't for your never ending concerns.

"luke." the sound of your voice makes your boyfriend hesitate.

eventually, he hums. with attitude, you don't fail to recognize.

"i think the sand's gonna–" you don't even have to finish your complaint before luke's adjusting your position. he sits on his haunches and pulls you closer by your hips, resuming his pace by thrusting up into you slowly, not at all deterred by having to hold your lap onto his and fuck you at the same time.

"better?" he asks, that same sass still heavy in his tone.

you hum appreciatively, closing your eyes and letting your mouth drop open in a sigh as luke nudges against a spot previously left unattended to.

you're placated, just for a bit, and that bit ends quickly when you're once again made aware of the grains against your upper back, likely making their way into your already ruined hair.

you groan, low and deep in your throat.

"luke," you whine, eyes open in a squint as you hold a hand up to block the suns glare. your unobstructed view is of luke staring down at you, eyes dark with frustration and his lips twisted into annoyance. a look you recognize well, one he's given you many times when you've danced on his nerves without any second thoughts.

your lips part, preparing to complain yet again. but that's all cut short when luke hooks his thumb into your mouth, the calloused tip pressing onto your pink muscle enough for him to pull your jaw down.

he purses his lips and you watch the glob of spit travel for a second before it lands in your mouth just slightly askew. tending to the remnants that landed on the outside, luke removes his thumb and glides it along your lip as if it's nothing but chapstick.

you don't have to be told to swallow. but you do have to be told to behave.

"will you shut up and let me make you feel good?"

although he poses it as one, it's definitely not a question.

[faith-forgxtten-land]

Hihihi!

I'm not sure if your requests are open, but the fic I just read was a request and was posted within the last 24 hrs, so I'm gonna take the chance that they are (can you tell I'm autistic yet?😂)

Could I request a slightly nsfw (just a lil spicy) Bay!Raph fic where the Fem! Reader is watching him workout and offhandedly mentions that she wishes she could lift as much as he does?

Her question prompts him to let her lay on the bench and "lift" the weights (obviously he's carrying almost all of the weight). Just a corny little piece that shows our Big Red some love.

Thank you for your time!💜

Spotting | Raphael

requests are open dw!! honestly feel free to send as many requests as you want at any time, if they're not open you'll know because i'll plaster it somewhere obvious. and corny pieces are the best kind <3

since its valentine's day, i kind of went extra corny with a vague valentine's plot... i hope you like it and lemme know what you think! it's only slightly spicy and suggestive because tbh i wasn't sure how far to go.

warnings: suggestive, slight choking? (oops) valentine's day mentions, single people try not cry too much. everyone is 18+!! never proofread

summary: it's valentine's day and for some reason you have nothing better to do than watch raphael lift weights

word count: 1195

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

“Why are you lifting weights on Valentine’s Day?”

“Why are you watching me lift weights on Valentine’s Day?” Raphael retorts quickly and it’s such a good question that you pause.

Well, then. You sniff in mock indignance. “I’ll have you know that I was asked out by 12.5 different people ahead of today, thank you very much.”

You can’t see it, but you can tell he’s smirking. “12.5?”

“I figure Mikey only counts for 0.5 since I’m pretty sure he’d ask every woman he sees if he could.”

Raph snorts and your mouth pulls into a stupidly wide smile knowing you’ve amused him. He’s so relaxed like this, when it’s just the two of you, and your smile turns soft at the thought. There’s no one you’d rather spend the day with – Valentine’s Day or not – and the view isn’t bad either.

Speaking of... you tilt your head. Rivulets of sweat trickle down his green skin and you bite your lip watching the flexing of his muscles. He’s so much bigger than you, you’re pretty sure his bicep is bigger than your head, and he could cover your entire face with his palm – he’d done it just yesterday when you wouldn’t stop pestering him about a romcom you wanted to watch (it’s okay, you knew they were secretly his favourite kind of movie too, he didn’t have to protest so much – even grown turtles should be allowed to indulge in some Richard Gere and Julia Roberts). 

His size had intimidated you at first, had made you hesitant, but now it makes your knees weak and makes your heart accelerate with something entirely different to fear. It’s quiet apart from his breathing and the clang of his weights and you wonder if he can hear the thundering of your pulse.

“You’re staring.”

“Hmm?”

His muscles flex again and you’re quick to press your thighs together. You’re certain it's deliberate at this point. “You’re staring,” he repeats, his voice a little deeper.

You flush as you realise what he’s saying. “Not my fault you can bench press a truck,” you grumble to hide your embarrassment. “I’m jealous.”

The terrapin smirks again and sits up, his eyes bright. “C’mere.”

“Ex-squeeze me?”

It’s Raph’s turn to grumble. “You’ve been hanging around Mikey too much.”

You grin because it's true and walk slowly towards where he’s waiting. Your feet are clearly more sensible and less fuzzy than your brain (you are definitely not still thinking – and staring – at his arms, nope) because they stop just before you can stand between his legs. His eyes run along the curves of your calves and his gaze feels like a dizzying caress as it glides up your torso, lingering on the bare skin around your throat in a hungry way that makes you swallow just to watch him watch the movement. “What’s the plan, Red?” 

Your voice doesn’t feel like your own and you’re kind of impressed by how put-together you sound. It’s not the breathless wheeze you expected, it's low and sultry and suggestive and your eyes flutter as his breath hitches. The two of you have flirted before but this feels different. It’s intimate beyond your typical friendly banter and you have the urge to touch him.

He reaches for you first, pulling you closer and resting his hands on your hips. His hands are huge, and your mouth feels dry as he squeezes a little too hard to be innocent. “Raph...”

He squeezes again at your murmur. “Lie down.” His voice is rough and you shiver. He brushes his fingers across the goosebumps he’s raised, and you let him manoeuvre you with ease.

It probably looks so silly, and you fight the incredulous laughter that bubbles in your chest. The bar above you is ridiculously oversized and heavy and the thought of you lifting it is absurd and your laugh can’t be stopped this time as you look at the green-skinned ninja above you. His lips are twitching as you cackle and your eyes focus on the scar that decorates them, longing to soothe your tongue over it, as you regain your composure. “You good?”

“I’m good,” you reassure him. He’s so fucking cute, you think. You can see his nervousness now even if he tries to play it off and you feel like you’ve just swallowed a bucketful of butterflies. “Are you spotting?”

Raph runs his tongue – you do not shift your hips at how thick it is – across his upper lip, over that scar you want to taste for yourself. He looks torn for a moment, building himself up, and places his heavy hands on the bar above you. “Something like that,” he agrees before instructing you on how to position your hands.

You push up and immediately swear at the impossible weight. Raph snickers and you pout and glare simultaneously. “Don’t be mean.”

“You haven’t seen me be mean, baby.”

Oh. Your glare falters. That’s just not fair and he knows it. He’s grinning now and you curse him in your head. You push again and this time the bar lifts, as light as a feather. His hands are still wrapped around it and you’re not lifting a single thing, but the moment feels heavy. He hasn’t let his eyes drift from yours and you don’t dare look away. It feels intense and intimate and you can admit that your skin is on fire and your pulse is throbbing knowing how easily he’s carrying a weight that you couldn’t budge with all your might.

He guides the bar back down after a moment that could have been seconds or minutes or hours and you release a breath you didn’t realise you were holding. He’s still looking at you as you sit up and he invades your personal space. You have to tilt your head back to maintain eye-contact and you shudder as his palm cups your chin.

He’s so tall and imposing and you have to bite your tongue as his hand trails further down. You let him wrap his fingers around your neck and you rest your hand on top of his in encouragement, unable to stop a needy whine as he heeds your silent request and squeezes gently. His pupils are blown and he’s breathing harder than he had been while working out and you feel smug knowing you’ve caused this reaction. In a blink he’s pushed you back and he’s leaning over you. He smells like sweat and his skin is damp from exertion and it's kind of gross and it really shouldn’t be turning you on, but it is and your legs spread involuntarily.

You expect him to close the gap between your lips as he hovers above you and your eyes that had fluttered shut open again when it’s clear he has no intention of moulding your mouths together. He’s got a soft look in his eyes paired with a devilish smile and it makes your chest burn. You don’t expect the next words out of his mouth.

“Be my Valentine?”

You splutter and he laughs as he finally presses his lips to yours.

[number1jeonginstan]

Hi! I was wondering if you could write a story in which hyunjin overstimulates y/n? And if you want, could you make y/n sensible and scared? Ty! I love your writing btw!

A/N: Sorry for taking so long to get this out, I’ve been kind of in a slump for writing and then I got the idea for what I should do because I was kinda struggling for a minute. I hope you liked it and I’m so thankful for the request! Thank you so much for your time and patience, I really appreciate it.

WC: 1.25k

Pairing: Hyunjin x (established relationship) afab!reader

Minors don't interact, 18+

Warnings: SMUT, overstimulation, some light slapping, good girl, baby, use of that stuff, idk what else tbh this was written at like 1 am

It was a lazy day between you and Hyunjin. Both still in your pajamas, you in silk shorts and one of his t-shirts, and him in his matching yellow and white checkered pajamas. You enjoyed this new mystery novel on his bed while he painted in his studio. It was the comfort of being next to one another that you had no idea what was yet to come. 

As you turned to the next page in your book, Hyunjin got up coming towards you. “Wanna have sex?” He asked, lying down next to you on the bed. You barely paid attention to him, too immersed in your book, simply humming. 

“Come on” he groaned lifting his head to you, “I need you baby” he huffed, still not eliciting a reaction from you. To try and get any reaction out of you, he began to run his fingers on your thighs. 

Ts when he ran his fingers along your thighs, placing wet kisses along your smooth thigh. “Jinnie, please” you whined “I want to finish this chapter, they are about to say who did it” 

“Wow, a book is more interesting than fucking your insanely hot boyfriend?” 

“Right now, yes!” you giggled, finishing reading the page you were on. Before you could even turn the page, he snatched the book out of your hand. “Don’t you dare fold the corner” you yelled, trying to snatch the book back. He giggled adding the bookmark he made you as a gift to mark the page. He got up and placed the book on his easel, far from your reach. 

“Fine” you groaned, falling back onto the bed, your head hitting the pillow. He walked back to the bed, crawling on top of you so his thighs locked yours in place. He placed a kiss on your lips, causing a giggle to leave your lips.

He moved to your neck, kissing and nibbling at the spot that drove you crazy. You could slowly feel yourself getting wetter. “Jinnie, please stop teasing” you whined, rubbing your thighs together to get any sort of stimulation. “I need you” 

“Be patient baby, we have all the time in the world”

He kissed your lips once again, trying to savor your taste. He began to move down your body, lifting your (his) shirt slightly to kiss your stomach, slowly moving down to your shorts. Without hesitation, he pulled down your shorts and underwear, throwing them somewhere in your shared room. 

“Fuck baby, this pussy is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen” he ran his fingers across your folds, capturing your wetness and putting his finger in his mouth, licking it off his fingers. “And you taste even better” 

You moaned watching him, and before you could even say anything, he dove into your pussy. His plush lips kissed your clit as he slowly inserted one of his long fingers into your hole. You grabbed his hair in his hand, forcing him to eat you like a man starved, and he was happy to. 

He was licking every inch of your pussy, slowly inserting another finger to give you the extra stimulation you needed. His fingers were long, not as long as his cock, but longer than your own and he was skilled with them. It took him another minute for you to cum around his fingers, moaning his name as your walls clenched around them. 

He began to kiss down your thigh, his plush lips covered in your cum from eating you out. “Jinnie, please, need you” you whined.

“You are a greedy little girl aren’t you, just made you cum with my mouth and fingers, but you are still begging for my cock” 

He slapped your thigh lightly, moving so he was on top of you, in between your legs. “Fuck, you are such a slut” he groaned, pulling his already hard cock from the confines of his boxers. The tip was already red, pre-cum slowly dripping out of the tip.

“Who’s the slut now?” you giggled, trying to joke around, but it only made Hyunjin to tease you more. Before you could react, he grabbed your face, making you look directly into his eyes. “If you keep acting like this, I’m going to fuck you like the little whore you are” 

“Sure Hyunjin, you can try and do that” You rolled your eyes, knowing that your boyfriend would never “fuck” you. Whenever the two of you had sex, he always liked to describe it as making love. He was someone who believed that sex was something that should be cherished. 

“Don’t test me baby, tonight you are going to be my cocksleeve” Before you could even react, he thrust his cock inside of you, not even giving you a warning. “How can you be such a whore and have such a tight pussy” 

You just moaned you had never seen him this way, and you were a bit scared, and your face reflected it. “Aww, baby don’t be scared, you’ll get to cum, don’t worry”

He nibbled on your ear softly, his pillow lips wrapping around your lobe as he continued to thrust into you. He slowly began to lift your legs slightly, signaling you to wrap your legs around his back, allowing him to hit that one spot inside your cunt.

“Such a good girl, moaning for my cock. Is it just that good?” 

He continued to thrust into you, not faltering his pace as he continued to abuse that one spot inside of you. All you could do was moan out in response. You were too fucked out, getting fucked too well to even understand the words coming out of his mouth. 

He slapped your face slightly, causing you to look up straight into his eyes. “I asked you a question, is my cock that good” 

“Yes Jinnie, your cock is the best I’ve ever had” you moaned out loud. He kissed your lips, muttering “good girl” on them, and with him thrusting into that one spot that made you whine, it was all you needed to cum. 

“Fuck baby, I can feel your walls clenching around me, but just because you came, doesn’t mean we are done” You whined, feeling overstimulated as he continued to abuse your pussy like there is no tomorrow. 

It all felt too much, him continuing to thrust into you even though you had just cum. You thrashed around slightly, not being able to take it. Just as you thought you were going to break, like the world around you was going to go black, he came inside of you, kissing your lips. 

You were still out of it as he quickly got up, getting a cloth to clean the cum that was spilling you out of with as well as a glass of water. “Baby, I need you to drink this” 

You just nodded, slowly drinking the glass of water that your boyfriend was holding in front of you. 

“Sorry if I was too rough, I just overheard you say that you wanted me to fuck you more often, I hope it was okay” 

He looked like a hurt puppy so you pulled him close to you, kissing his lips gently. “It was amazing Jinnie, but next time, give me some warning because I was scared shitless” 

He just giggled as he wrapped his arms around you as you both fell asleep together. Maybe not knowing the end of the book is worth it. 

[gamarancianne]

Azriel x reader - In Between part 2

Part 1

Summary: trying to regain your confidence after your broken heart, you met someone in the same position as you and developped one of the best friendships you had ever had. A genuine and sincere friendship. But this person may be closer by other ways to you than you thought.

Warnings: still angst, alcohol in a not healthy way, heartbreak again, hypocrite Elain (kinda slander ig), Lucien being the best.

Note: well maybe a part 3 ig 😅, I was really inspired tbh. Thank you all for having loved the part 1 and shared it with me ! Ily 💗💗 and don't hesitate to ask me something or chat with me in my inbox or dm, or in the comments !

You had been a crying mess for two weeks now, sometimes you went out in a bar to drink so much you would forget even your name. That was the point, forget the constant sting in your heart and you head. Forget him, his beautiful Hazel eyes and inked tattoos on his broad and golden chest. And here we go again: the tears flooded themselves on your face. It was a day to drink today, or tonight, you didn't really have a time notion for the past two weeks: waking up at dawn or dusk, eating, crying and sleeping. You had to forget about all those beautiful things about him, you had to empty your brain and heart. You didn't want to feel something again.

As you were walking to the nearest bar, you thought about those letters elain had sent you, saying you were her dearest friend and asking if your confession went well. You knew she knew that it was you in her apartment that cursed day, but she still pretended and even was saying the complete opposite of what she had said to azriel, falsely comforting you. Was she ever was your friend at this point ? Or has she always criticised and stabbed you behind you back ? Anyway you had decided that it was way better for you to ignore her and keep living your life, if you could still call what you were living a life, without her.

You didn't even noticed when you had arrived in front the door of the bar, but you did and entered, going directly to your now favorite spit in front of the barman : the alcohol was there easier to get. You didn't see then, the redhead man who was at the exact place you had been the few days prior. How dare he steal your chair like that ? Approaching slowly you stilled and you understood that this man was surely in the same situation as you, a heartbreak, seeing his bent frame and the many empty glasses in front of him. They could only have been his because no one was seated near him, and everyone was judging him. They were all avoiding the poor man whose name you didn't know.

"I was almost mad at you for stealing my favourite seat" you stated, seating next to him as his head shot to your side wondering if you were really talking to him.

"Yes I'm talking to you"

"Ah, I'm sorry for your seat do you want it back ?" He asked, genuinely embarrassed, his cheeks flushed.

"No I'm fine here, I can speak with you ...?" You asked ?

"Lucien".

"I'm yn, and as I was saying, I can speak with you here Lucien" he nodded.

"Nice to meet you yn, but you don't wanna talk to me, don't you see all the glares everyone sends me here ?" He drank in a one shot what seemed to be whisky and stared again at his now empty glass.

"Oh gods you men !" He looked at you confused "I know what I'm doing fuck ! I'm a grown up woman and I can make my own choices ! You re the second on in two weeks who tells me what I want or not." You snapped.

"Oh I'm sorry, then stay if you want." He apologized quickly.

You asked shots to the barman and stayed silent a bit nefore you both asked in one voice "what are you here for ?". You two chuckled a bit before you said "you first".

"Well I've kinda learnt that my mate, who knows that she is my mate is dating someone else. And I feel like I'm not allowed to have just once an ounce of happiness." You were hurt for him as you heard his story that he told you with a careless demeanor. He must really be at his lowest.

"Ouch that hurts, I'm sorry man. She's a fool if you want my opinion." He smiled sadly at your answer and pointed you from his chin asking you silently your story.

"Well im heartbroken as well, my best friend encouraged me confessing to the man I love, but he rejected me, and not in a nice way. But as lucky as I am, I learnt that he is dating my best friend who is a back stabber." I emptied my glass in one drink.

"Ouch that hurts too, I'm sorry." He said echoing my words.

We spent the night drinking, and drowning ourselves in alcohol but in a more joyful way than usually.

I then went more and more at the bar to see him, but we drank less and less, leaving place to real conversations between us. It became quickly a routine, and Lucien became one of my best friends, well my only friend of the time actually. And I was one of his only friend as well. Two broken hearts healing parts of eachothzr then didn't even break. Lucien had explained to me his family problem, and how his former male best friend was a toxic man in relationships, how he had been poorly treated in his biological family, and how his actual best friend was his mate's sister so he didn't know how to approach her anymore. He came a lot in my appartment to spend time with me, he even slept in sometimes, because he couldn't face his current family. He practically had his room in your home, some of his stuff never really left.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

After 2 knocks on your door you unwillingly got off your couch and opened it letting a wild and out of breath Lucien appear in front of it.

"Lu ? Are you okay ?" That was his new nickname, he loved it, because he felt like he was loved for once in his life.

"Yes.. no ? I need you to come with me like right now ! "

"Oh okay let me get me keys and I'm coming" you trusted Lucien too much to ever doubt about him, if he needed you then you were there for him.

You left your apartment and went to the direction he indicated. After a while you panicked a little, seeing that you were going to the high lord's house.

"Lucien you know I love you but where are we going?"

"To a family dinner, I can't go alone. See, my mate's relationship got complicated and she always complains to me when I'm alone, which is all the time. So I feel like I'm just a plan b and I'm really uncomfortable when she does it. Don't worry I've told them that someone was going with me."

"I understand Lu, but at the high lord's ?" You asked sceptical.

"Well yes, because my best friend I told you about is Feyre."

"What ?" Lucien, had never told the names of his family members, and you neither, so discovering that his friend was you high lady so that you were going to see Azriel made you weak to the bones.

"Lucien ? Your mate is Elain ??"

"What, yes ? How do you know ??" He exclaimed as he stopped on his tracks.

"She is the fake friend I told you about !" You answered on the same tone.

"So it means that.."

"I am in love with Azriel... yes."

"Oh gods" you both sighed.

"Hum yn ?" He asked unsure of what to say.

"Mmh"

"Have I told you that Cassian and him were the ones to get us to the house?"

"No, no, no. Please no ! But what would we even need to be picked up ?"

"We can't winnow so it's either that or climb 10 000 stairs".

Both fearing the fast approaching dinner, the last part of the walk was silent and the air heavy with tension. You held your breath when you saw two winged big figures, Cassian and Azriel. The first one shot his head in your direction and smiled confused.

"Yn ?" Azriel stiffened as he heard your name. "What does owe us the pleasure to see you ?"

"I'm the one to go with Lu today but I didn't know it was with you...". Azriel froze completely still turning his back to you. He wasn't sure it was you but now it was certain and he couldn't face you after the mean things he had said to your face. He hadn't talked about it to anyone except Elain and he kinda regretted it now. Things had got complicated between them because after your love confession she had grown so much jealous! He couldn't bear it anymore, he was a free man, he hadn't wings for nothing! They would argue a lot more and he hated that because it triggered bad memories in him. Plus he felt a bit bad about you. You hadn't done anything to him to deserve to be treated that way, he was ashamed of his actions because he knew that, as insecure as you seemed to be, you might have been spiralling since. That wasn't him, that wasn't how he was supposed to be. When he got Elain, she changed him a lot, and he wasn't sure anymore that it was for the good. She crushed all of his efforts to keep the bad parts of him inside. He was meaner, colder, he wasn't himself. Rhys have scolded him a little about that and he had really reacted in a bad way. An evidence of what Rhys had advanced. Azriel was sure he had made you feel bad, and he didn't want it : you were a nice and smart female, a little clumsy but still beautiful and lovely. As he finally turned to you, all of his regret splashed on him when crossing your look and seeing you pained eyes. You quickly put your head down and he felt even more bad to have made lose enough confidence for you to fear to hold his gaze. Thinking about it, he didn't understand you insecurity of the beginning, before the altercation. How could you, a very beautiful female, ever doubt about yourself ?

Realisation hit him, that he would have to take you flying because it would be awkward if he took Lucien, his girlfriend's mate. He knew she was complaining to him, and he felt even sorry for the poor Lucien. But a question lingered in his mind: how did you two know eachother ? And why the fuck would Lucien bring you to a family dinner ? Were you dating ? Fear crossed his eyes for a second before regaining his composure. You couldn't be dating Lucien, it was impossible, you had just said two weeks ago that you loved him. Could you have moved that fast ? It frightened him, knowing that he had grown to like you when thinking of your shared moments at training, where you two had laughed, sometimes until crying joy tears, and regretting the mean rejection he had given you in return of something so intimate and innocent as your love and devotion for him. Damn him he had even insulted you ! He cursed himself more and more until he got out of his head when Cassian called him.

"Azriel wake up ! You take yn." He said when shooting in the sky Lucien in his arms.

You both stayed in an awkward bubble, without moving an inch, avoiding the gaze of one another, for 30 long seconds that felt like hours.

"I'm sorry" and "so how are you doing" came at the same time from him side you. You awkwardly chuckled but he stayed still so you stopped finally having the guts to look at him in the eye for more than a millisecond.

"I'm sorry." He repeated, louder this time. You froze. You didn't want that to happen. You didn't want him to face you abut what happened. It would made it real, and you still hadn't enough courage for that.

"What for ?" You asked, your voice breaking.

"You what for".

You hesitated a lot before responding. "No actually I don't. Was it for mean rejecting me without an ounce of regret or nicenessin your words ? Or maybe the fact that you destroyed my confidence? Oh no ! I know, it was for the time you mocked me in front of my friend, who is in fact your girlfriend, and a fake friend!"

"You weren't supposed to be there that time." He said, suddenly finding the floor really interesting.

"Maybe but I was, so it's the same result and the same mean words that came out of your mouth."

He knew you were right. You were completely allowed to be mad at him for the way he treated you. But it was still hard. Azriel had never been in proper relationships nor had he ever been confessed to. It wasn't a proper excuse but it still made it hard to accommodate to those things for a boy deprived of love for all his life. He didn't know how to react, so to him, the better solution was to stay silent. You sighed, disappointed and he came awkwardly closer to you to hold you and shoot in the sky, following Cassian and Lucien, long arrived and waiting for you worried (especially Lucien).

Elain was waiting for Azriel, or Lucien, no one knew, on the balcony of the House of Wind and almost fell when she saw you. You in Azriel's arms, accompanying Lucien. Azriel struggled to let you go, especially after your conversation, but the second you were out of his hold, Elain held you in a crushing hug. You rapidly got out as well, feeling uncomfortable after her hypocrisy. You gave her a sad smile and Lucien introduced you to Feyre and Rhysand who had already told you to call them by their name, and to Mor and Amren. They all welcomed you warmly except Elain and Azriel of course who both looked like ashamed puppies with their tails between their legs.

After dinner, everyone went out in the garden for a tea and you found yourself on a couch behind Lucien sat on the floor. Automatically, because it was something you were now used to do, your hands found his head and started playing with his hair. Everyone had their eyes on you, confused on your proximity but you didn't notice and kept going on braiding his hair.

"I'll do yours later I promise" Lucien said, looking at you from above.

"I hope so !". Leaving everyone even more confused now.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

When you were ready to left with Lucien, Elain caught you and asked you to have a word with her.

Lucien gave you a worried look and you nodded making him understand you were okay for now.

She led you to a private room and paced in it awkwardly. She opened her mouth twice and closed it almost instantly like she wanted to say something but didn't know where to start.

"So, you ans Azriel ? Huh"

"You have actually no right to be mad at me." She cut you off.

"Excuse me ? But I have every right to be mad at you right now ! You have treated me poorly faking to be my friend and laughing at me when you should have been comforting me !" You snapped, angry.

"Well, it's not like someone could ever treat you well."

"What, what do you mean ?"

"Look at you yn, nobody would ever really be with you. You're not ugly but you're not beautifu, you're not dumb but you're not smart, you're just.. Well you. And that's clearly not enough." She looked at you disgustingly.

"But Lucien is treating me well.." You said tears welling in your eyes.

"Don't be blind, yn, he's a man, and like Azriel he will ran to me when he'll see that you're no longer interesting. You were nice and all, you listened to me but I guess I just got bored of you, anyone would." And with that she left the room, leaving 8 pairs of eyes on you as she opened the door. They instantly approached you, Feyre apologising a thousand time for the mean behaviour of her sister and Azriel staying in the back, his eyes full of worry and apology. He was trying to make you feel like everything she had said was false, that you were so much more than that, worthy of the stars,of two shining stars. Because yes they had heard everything. Lucien made his way to the crowd of his family surrounding you and hesitated before he hugged you out of nowhere. Azriel clenched his jaw and his hands turned into fists. When Lucien released you of his grasp, your expression hadn't changed, its like you were empty, just one single tears had escaped your eye. Cassian and Azriel flew you to the ground of Velaris and the last one had kept his hand on yours to make you look at him.

"I'm sorry, for what she said. It's not one bit true."

"Don't worry, she's surely right..." You had answered your gaze falling on his hand. You had never noticed the scars an them, they were so beautiful, so textured, so unique. You eyes widened at the sight and Azriel quickly hid them behind back before keeping going.

"No she wasn't, please don't doubt yourself because of what came out of her mouth because of jealousy. Because that's what she was and still is, jealous."

"Thank you Az really." You sadly smiled at him before joining Lucien who was waiting for you.

He didn't know why, but something clicked in him seeing you walk away under the arm of Lucien and hearing again his nickname from your mouth. He thought it rolled well on your tongue and really wanted to hear it again, as soon as possible. And it tensed him a lot to know that this man who touched you, was probably sleeping at yours tonight, maybe in your bed to comfort you after this emotionally hard day. It puzzled him a lot and didn't even know why, until his shadows came to his ears and murmured repeatedly "want to be him".

Tag list:

@kalulakunundrum

[mysaintkitten]

you want to do a student/teacher roleplay with Mike kiernan 😏 he is hesitant at first but gives in

Bad Behaviour | Mike Kiernan x fem!reader

prompt: mr. kiernan punishes you (NSFW!! NO MINORS!!)

WARNINGS: very minimal plot. pure smut. student/teacher role play obvi, spanking, innocence kink, size kink(ish), unprotected sex (p in v), creampie, orgasm denial

word count: not sure tbh, not very long 🤷‍♀️ (not proofread)

“i don’t know .. i just feel weird about it because i’m like .. i’m an actual teacher, you know.” mike admitted, he was fully down for role play, but when you mentioned a teacher and student role play .. he got a bit wary.

you sigh softly, “i understand, mike, but i’m not an actual student. we’re two adults. it’s pretend, baby.” he nods, but he still doesn’t budge.

“how about this,” you start, “we’ll try it out, and if it gets too uncomfortable for you, we can stop. okay?”

after a few moments of consideration, he huffs and dips his head back, “fine.”

as you bite your lip with excitement and lean over to kiss his cheek, you quickly scramble off the bed to start getting changed.

the two of you start to prepare for this role play. he dresses as he normally would, but a bit more formally, and you slip into a short plaid skirt and a tight button up with a bit of cleavage peaking out.

once mike gives you the heads up that he’s ready, you knock on the bedroom door, and the show begins.

“mr. kiernan?” you ask from outside the door,

“come in.” he responds sternly. “and shut the door behind you.”

you comply and slink your sway inside, shutting the door behind you. mike hasn’t seen you in this costume before, and he can already feel himself getting a bit worked up at just the sight of you.

“do you why you’ve been brought to detention, young lady?” mike questions, leaning his body forward to open a small drawer and pulling out a wooden ruler.

“no sir .. i’m not sure.” you say coyly, clasping your hands behind your back while giving mike an innocent glare

he sighs and slowly walks over to the edge of the bed and sits down. “you’ve been a very, very bad girl.” he claims for the sake of the role play, “now, come here.” he adds while patting his lap.

you approach him timidly, watching how his eyes scan from your tits down to your legs. you’re so exposed, yet clothed enough to leave just a bit to the imagination. mike knows exactly what your body looks like, yet when you’re packaged up like this it’s almost like you’re brand new to him.

as you stand beside him, he pats his lap again.

“lay across my thighs, darling.”

you follow his commands and lay your stomach against his thighs, wiggling around a bit to get yourself comfortable before slightly perking your ass out for him.

“do you know how we punish girls who misbehave?” mike purrs, running his large hand against one of your clothed ass cheeks. you shake your head, “no, sir.”

“they get spanked, sweetheart. you’re going to get ten strikes and you’re going to count them aloud, understood?” mike hums as he switches the ruler to his dominant hand.

“yes, sir. i understand.” you breathed, mentally preparing yourself for the smacks.

“good girl.” he praises quietly as he slowly lifts the bottom half of your skirt, quickly realizing that you have no underwear on underneath. he groans at the sight of your pussy, you smirk proudly while hiding your face.

he clicks his tongue and skims his hand along the bare skin, “no panties either? dirty, dirty girl ..” he scolds, bringing the ruler down to your ass and teasingly pressing against the cheek, “ready?”

“mhm ..” you mumble, biting your fist in anticipation,

“what was that?” mike taunts, lightly tapping your ass with the ruler. your body jolts gently at he light smack, and you clear your throat to respond. “yes, sir. i’m ready.”

“good.” he purrs before bringing the ruler up and quickly snapping it back down, causing a harsh sting to spread across your ass.

“mh!” you whimper, “one ..”

he snaps it down again,

“t-two ..”

and again,

“th.. three ..”

and again, and again, and again, until you reach 10. you don’t know if it was deliberate, but it felt like the smacks were getting rougher and rougher as they went on.

“there you go, hopefully now you’ll ..” mike begins to say before his voice trails off, your now glistening pussy catches his eye. he leans in a bit closer and spreads your slick lips apart with his index finger and thumb, chuckling breathily at what he sees.

“did those spankings get you excited, pretty girl?”

“i feel all tingly and warm between my thighs .. i don’t know why, sir ..” you whine, shifting your hips around in attempt to give yourself some friction on your needy pussy.

mike sighs as he dips a finger between your folds, spreading your slick around. “it’s natural, love. your body likes the touches. and when your body wants more, your sweet little cunt will get all wet ..”

he slides his middle finger inside of you with ease, you moan quietly and clench your thighs together. mike feels his cock twitch in his pants at the slight grip of your pussy against his finger.

“‘n it loosens up, see how easily you took my finger, baby?” he adds, slowly fucking you with the lone digit. “your cunt wants something bigger, doesn’t it, darling?”

“yes .. i think so, sir ..” you moan, feeling your cheeks tint pink from the eroticism. for someone who initially didn’t want to do this, mike is doing a really good job.

“you want me to fill you up, baby? make that cunt feel nice ‘n full?” mike purrs, his eyes glued on your pussy as it eagerly accepts his slick finger, your arousal beginning to spill onto his palm.

“yes, sir ..” you groan pathetically beneath him, he tuts quietly as he slides his finger out, teasingly sliding it between your folds again while you whimper. “where are those manners, sweet girl? let’s do this again .. would you like me to make your cunt feel good?”

“yes, yes, please sir!” you huff, arching your back against his touch, mike smirks and pats your ass gently. “good girl. get on the bed and lay down on your back.”

you quickly rise to your feet and scramble onto the bed, you lay on your back and patiently wait for mike with your knees bent and thighs together. mike gets up and crawls onto the bed, you can see something different in him. something in his eyes. he’s too far into the role play to want to stop now.

he sits on his knees in front of you and places his hands on your thighs, “spread your legs for me, love.” mike cooed. you comply, slowly spreading your thighs apart for him. he finally gets a better view of your pussy, but your skirt is still adding the slightest bit of coverage. something about it is so slutty, he didn’t realize how much it would rile him up.

he reached his hand out and toys with your folds again, using his free hand to lovingly pet your outer thigh.

“has anyone ever licked you here before?” he questions softly. he knows the answer. he’s eaten you out before, but it’s a part of pretending. and some deeper part of him does like the idea of being the one to make you feel all these things for the first time.

“no, sir .. never ..” you breathed as you shift your hips forward slightly to give him a better angle to play with you.

“would you like me to, pretty girl?”

“hm ..” you breathed, “what if i don’t taste good ..”

mike brings his slick fingers up to his mouth and sucks your arousal off, humming approvingly at your taste.

“tastes real fuckin’ sweet, love .. “ he praises, his cock is aching at this point. he wants to be inside you so badly, but he needs to taste you first. if he had the option between penetrating you and eating you, he’d pick the latter every time. he was an absolute fiend for oral, giving and receiving.

before you know it, his head is between your legs and he’s lapping you up like his life depends on it.

“oh, jesus, sir!” you moan loudly as mike brings his attention towards your clit, sucking on the swollen bud skillfully.

“does it feel nice?” he temporarily moves his mouth to ask, quickly returning continue sucking on your clit.

“it’s .. it’s good just .. too much ..” you pant, shifting your hips around beneath his head. he doesn’t allow this for long, his hands make their way to your hips and he forcefully holds them down in place.

“poor baby ..” he taunts, breathing heavily against your warm core. “is your clit too sensitive for that? would you prefer for me to ..” before finishing, he licks a long flat stripe against your cunt, starting right from the bottom of your opening and ending with him flicking his tongue off your clit.

“o-oh, mike!” you gasp, temporarily losing your ‘character’ in the moment, he lets out a small breathy laugh against you before correcting you. “it’s sir, or mr. kiernan, sweetheart. don’t make me have to correct you again.”

“i’m s-orry .. sir, please, need you-“ you ramble as your heels dig into the mattress, your hips wriggling around involuntarily as mike eagerly prods your hole with his tongue, occasionally bringing his tongue back up to lick your clit before bringing it back down to your hole and repeating the process.

“need me how, love? come on, you’re a big girl. use your words.”

“mmf “ you whimper in desperation, “your cock, sir, please-“

“there we go. so polite.” he purrs as he removes his head from between your legs and finally begins to free his eager member. as he unzips his pants and tugs them down, he refrains from palming himself. he’s already so hard, and he wants to feel you more than his measly palm.

he removes his pants and boxers, your eyes shift down to his flushed hard cock. the slight shine of pre come on his tip catches your attention.

“sir ..” you choke, “you’re .. really big ..”

he chuckles, “think you can handle it?”

you nod slowly while tucking your bottom lip between your teeth.

“has anyone ever fucked you raw before, pretty girl?” mike hums, lowering himself down to align his tip with your opening. he teases your folds, nearly pushing himself inside before pulling back out, spreading your arousal around with the head.

“n-no, mr. kiernan ..” you pant, lolling your head back as pure desperation floods your system. you know he’s probably working you up on purpose, fuelling the role play in a sense, but you need him, oh so badly.

mike smirked, “it’ll feel so nice, sweet thing .. nothing between us ..”

as he finishes his sentence, he slowly begins to insert himself inside you, exhaling deeply at the snug sensation.

“is this ..” he starts before groaning, “‘s this comfortable for you, love?”

small whimpers spill from your lips, “yeah .. mmf- just .. hurts a bit ..”

mike thrusts into you slowly at a calm and steady pace, slowly stretching you open around his cock. the stinging began to dull and you were left with the pleasure of mike inside you

as your whines shift into moans, mike begins to pick up the pace. “look at that ..” he hums as he watches himself disappear inside of you, “who woulda thought that a little thing like you would take my cock so well ..”

“ngh-“ you huff as mike gets harsher with his thrust, “‘m not little-“

“you’re little compared to me, sweet girl.” he corrects as his eyes make their way back up to your face while placing his hands onto your hips and gripping them roughly. “and this cunt- fuck, this cunt .. gripping me so goddamn good, baby.”

you glance at mike as he pounds into you. there’s something so sexy about seeing him get so dirty in his formal wear. if anyone saw him out in public dressed like this, they’d never be able to guess what disgusting things he likes to say in the bedroom. they’d wouldn’t assume he’d be fucking his girlfriend raw while she wears a school girl outfit, that’s for sure.

“how’s it feel, hm?” mike groaned, “‘m so fucking deep inside of you .. can you feel me here, love?” he asks while pressing the pads of his fingers onto your lower abdomen. you whimper loudly as you feel his tip brush against the area he’s pressing on, “yes- yes, s-sir-“

“pretty little thing has never been this full before, has she?”

you shake your head while whining, finding it hard to articulate any sort of sentence right now.

“keep being a bad girl .. and i can ‘punish’ you whenever .. fill up this cunt whenever you need it ..” mike chuckles, “i’ll still spank you .. now that i know how wet that gets you ..”

a new wave of arousal rushes through your body and you feel yourself becoming wetter around mike, “s-sir-“ you mewl.

“sweetheart ..” mike growls at the sensation of you getting slicker around him, your walls occasionally clenching around him in the process. “you like the idea of me punishing you, don’t you?”

you swallow and nod, gripping the duvet beneath you so harshly that your knuckles begin to turn white.

“filthy little thing .. showing up to her punishment with no panties on .. hoping her teacher sees and takes advantage of her ..” he hisses, his thrusts becoming sloppier as his jaw hangs slack.

mike screws his eyes shut and tips his head back, “god, fuck-“ he moans under his breath, “gonna come, baby-“. you clench around him more, deliberately, trying to get him closer to his orgasm. and unsurprisingly, you succeed.

as he holds his hips tightly against yours, his load spills inside of you, you feel the warm liquid shooting out of him as he huffs loudly, mumbling curses and praises.

with a few more weak thrusts, he slowly pulls himself out. he lifts up your skirt to get a better view of his come spilling out of you. he groans, slowly pushing a finger inside to stuff his come back inside of you.

“sir ..” you whimper, “hm?” mike responds, crawling off the bed to zip up his pants.

“i didn’t finish ..”

he tuts and pouts condescendingly, “aw. too bad, baby.”

“but i was so close ..” you frown, spreading your legs a bit for him in hopes that he’ll come back and resume the job.

“for future reference, my love, orgasms aren’t just given. they’re earned. and you haven’t earned it.” mike shrugs, “sorry, pretty girl. behave better in class and maybe i’ll consider letting you come.”

and with that, mike leaves you on the bed. high and dry. well, not really dry, but high for sure.

—

helloooo !! this isn’t very long, i know, but i hope you guys still enjoy it !!

[loveywon]

♡𓂃 ALWAYS BE HERE !

part 2 of START NOW !

pairing: jungwon x gn!reader

synopsis: after being stuck with jungwon in a new and unfamiliar world, you start developing newfound feelings about him.

wc: 4.0k+

warnings: fluff! there’s a baby, one (1) mention of throwing up, the fluff in this is so sickening seriously i feel gross, i think that's it tbh, not proofread as per usual

a/n: surprise!! thank you guys sm for 800 notes on my first fic, im literally experiencing whiplash from it. hope this was written well to your likings, i love you all and thank you guys again<333.

you feel like you’ve been slapped in the face. 

jungwon has basically adapted the routine within the first week, between taking care of the kid that is apparently yours and his job that he only found out two days ago because he got a call saying “you’re gonna get fired if you keep skipping work like this” from sunghoon. with a look at his checking account, his eyes almost popped out of his head with how much money was in there. when he showed you, you simply shrugged. of course jungwon was going to be successful, with how his high school life is (now, was), he’s bound to live a fulfilling life. he’s taken aback by your nonchalance to the money in the account, and you have to swallow your pride down to admit vocally to him that you always admired his dedication to the academic school life. 

speaking of, you found yourself swallowing your pride often. almost too often, you think, but you feel like its character development, or at least it’s what jungwon says. he’s done a great job at making sure you’re not too overwhelmed in this new life that you two have to adapt, and you feel kind of bad that you’re not really doing much with helping out. you do try, really! it’s just the fact that not being around kids often is a tad bit hard and being thrown into a situation where you have one of your own is more difficult than you thought it would be. jungwon does a great job at teaching you the basics, and he always reassures you that you’re doing great with the baby, even if it’s just holding her or feeding her. 

you also find yourself being more open with jungwon. it still feels foreign, and you always hesitate still and almost back out often times, but you’re determined to stick to your promise and to at least try, because jungwon has been nothing but an angel to you ever since, and the newfound realization that he has been pining for you this entire time makes you want to try harder for him. you’ve confided in him and you start to feel more safe around him as well, and admittedly, it’s something you never thought would happen, but when jungwon tells you every moment that has made him fall harder for you, you start to feel fuzzy and warm, even giggling a little. jungwon feels over the moon, like he’s absolutely won at life. he doesn’t want to leave. 

on the other hand, you want to leave. as cute as the baby is and nice the house is, something is still off and you don’t know how jungwon does everything so naturally and pretends like everything is so normal when it’s so far from reality. neither of you have figured out how the two of you got here, because there was quite literally nothing to go off of. every night you wonder if you’ll ever be able to go back to high school, but now you’re letting yourself fall into the daily routine you and jungwon curated. 

the sunlight shines through the blinds, and you’re already awake. every morning feels like deja vu, and you’re not used to sleeping on a foreign mattress. jungwon lays on the floor beside you, a blanket wrapped around him like a burrito. he insisted on sleeping on the floor because he didn’t want to pressure you, even though you assured him it was fine, but he still was stubborn and laid out his own makeshift bed beside you. it’s a sweet gesture, you think, and every night you invite him to sleep up on the bed because it can’t be comfortable to sleep on the floor, but he still refuses and makes himself comfy. 

you lean down, poking his shoulder. he stirs, but he’s still asleep. you smile slightly at his cute sleeping state, but you slap a hand over your mouth when you catch yourself. something you’re not used to is smiling at something whenever jungwon does something because you’re normally grimacing in disgust. you decide to let him sleep in and try to take care of the baby yourself since he’s been doing everything lately. he must’ve been so exhausted, and you feel yourself frowning. 

you roll yourself out of bed, making your way to the baby’s room. she blinks her eyes open as soon as she hears the door knob turn, and she reaches her small arms out for you. “hi, sweetheart, had a good sleep?” you ask, even though you know you’ll only get random babbles as a reply. you tickle her side and she giggles. you feel a fuzzy feeling again, and you admire the baby for a few minutes. one thing that ‘future you’ didn’t put in the scrapbook was the baby’s name, so you and jungwon refer to the baby as the baby. it feels almost too adulting to give the baby a name, so honestly you’ve been avoiding it but jungwon doesn’t bring it up either so you assume it’s mutual. you go over to the little counter by the wall and start making the baby’s milk, remembering what jungwon had taught you last week. pouring the milk into the baby bottle, you walk back to the crib and pick the baby up, opting to sit on the carpeted floor and feeding her the bottle. you smile as you simply look at her, almost fondly but it’s still off. 

jungwon walks in, rubbing his eyes groggily. he woken up not too long ago, and upon not seeing you in the bed, he almost panics. he thought you somehow had went back to high school or something, and he was just left here. he sighs in relief when he heard the milk machine stir loudly from the baby’s room. after his vision’s finally clear and sees you feeding the baby, he matches your smile and sits down on the floor across from you. the only reason why he has not brought up the baby’s name is because you haven’t, and he thinks he knows you enough to know that you’re not used to this new world, and he also knows its scary to put a label on things and naming the baby feels almost too official, like the two of you are stuck here. but jungwon doesn’t feel stuck, and he almost feels content in this new life. he has you now, with him, what more could he ask for? just like you, he wonders if you two will ever go back. but he’s more worried if you’ll still try to reciprocate his feelings for you if you two go back, and if you will forget everything that happened in this life. he’ll go back to square one, and he’s not sure if he can go through it again. although if it’s for you, he knows he’ll go through hell and back if it meant being with you. 

he leans forward a bit to watch the baby drink from her bottle, and your gaze changes from the baby to jungwon. it’s a quiet moment, no things are spoken between the two of you and it’s definitely less awkward than it would have been a week ago. silence is now comfortable to you, which is very odd considering you hate any silent moments and you always have to break the silence whenever it happens. “she is so cute,” jungwon whispers, but still loud enough that you can hear. you nod in agreement, she really is cute, and she took a lot of features from jungwon. the resemblance is almost uncanny and you think it was obvious from the start that the baby is definitely jungwon’s. the baby finishes her bottle and pops it out of her mouth, and jungwon takes it to the built in sink on the counter to wash it. she’s dozing off in your arms, and you swear you almost loudly coo at her but you catch yourself in time. you stand up and lay her down gently in the crib as jungwon finishes washing the baby bottle. 

you two make your way downstairs and you sit down on the kitchen island with the scrapbook laid out in front of you. this would make it the second time you’ve looked through the book, and you wonder if you missed anything from the first time you flipped through it. jungwon busies himself with the stove, preparing breakfast for the both of you. you lean your head on one hand, opening up the scrapbook. you don’t remember ever picking up the hobby of scrapbooking, but then again, it feels like you’ve aged ten years, and a lot of things can change in ten years. you also think a lot of things can change in a mere week. 

as you continue to flip through the pages, you stop at a page that had pictures of you and jungwon in front of different landscapes around the world. it’s secretly your favorite page because you’ve always wanted to travel, so to know that you did, even if you don’t recall, it makes you feel a little giddy. maybe when you go back home, you’ll get to experience it. as you’re scanning through the pictures, one of the tapes keeping the pictures on the page loosens up, and you try to fix it until you see handwriting on the back. you furrow your brows in confusion, taking the entire tape off and flipping the picture over. the entire scrapbook didn’t have any writing, so seeing something written on the back was new to you. and not only was it your own handwriting, but what was written on it gave you goosebumps. you always felt odd about this entire situation, even though it was quite obvious that you’re currently in the future, it was just the question of why and how. 

‘you’ll be here one day! 2/17/2034’ 

you flip the photo back around and messily tape it back onto the scrapbook page before shutting it and shoving it to the side. you try your best to think nothing of it, and it could mean literally anything if you think about it deep enough, right? wrong, you frown. it’s too oddly specific, and it’s like you knew that you want to experience traveling. you stare off into space, your bottom lip capturing between your teeth. jungwon finishes cooking, and he places a plate in front of you before taking a seat beside you. he looks at you when you don’t make a move to eat, leaning forward to see your face. he waves a hand in your face, calling out your name. you snap out of it again, and you shake your head. “sorry,” you mumble, grabbing the fork he gives you and taking a bite out of the eggs. “mm, this is so good! seriously, how did i not know you can cook like this?” you turn to him, quickly changing the topic before he could ask what was wrong. you know that you’re technically hiding and guarding yourself again, but you let yourself just this once because you’ve convinced yourself that you’re only inconveniencing jungwon with your thoughts. 

he shrugs, “because you always fought with me back then?” he answers obviously, and you let out a silent “right”. the week has felt like an entire year so you almost forget that you literally hated him just a week ago. “sorry. but you know, why didn’t you ever clear up the misunderstanding with me? we could have been friends then,” you ask, it’s simply out of curiosity because it’s not like it would have changed anything now. he shrugs again, “i don’t think you would have listened to me, to be honest. you probably would’ve death glared at me and killed me with silence… and i guess i was just content with you bickering with me because you were still talking to me. i don’t know if you still would’ve talked to me if i cleared it up, and i still want to talk to you.” he replies, smiling more to himself because he thinks it’s kind of funny. 

“ohh. that’s fair, i guess. i probably wouldn’t have talked to you if you cleared it up, to be honest as well. would have moved on with my life and not think twice about it,” you shrugged, continuing to eat your breakfast. you always play the nonchalance role, but jungwon always has a way with his words that make butterflies flutter in your stomach and it almost makes you feel queasy even. “but, i still want to talk to you too.” you smile at him, and he returns your smile. he thinks you’ve definitely put in effort with tolerating him, because a week ago you probably would’ve spilled your guts if you heard what he said, and he appreciates your efforts. he’s still not really expecting an ‘i like you back’ from you, he still thinks its unrealistic. it doesn’t mean he’ll stop trying and vying for you. 

you finish your plate and grab jungwon’s empty plate to the sink to wash, and he watches idly since the baby is still asleep and there isn’t much to do. you think jungwon’s already used to the new life, but you really couldn’t be more wrong. he’s used to taking care of himself already, which is why it comes to natural to him, but he’s really not used to the whole thing of you being nice with him and the fact that there is a baby in the room above that is his. his baby, your baby. he gets fuzzy thinking about it, which is why he thinks he’s trying his best to take care of the baby with little to no experience. his cousins are the closest thing to experience he has. 

once you finish with the dishes, the two of you silently make your way onto the couch. it’s not really awkward silence, as again, you feel more comfortable around jungwon now. but you’ve been itching to ask him the question that you think about every night, and you think that it’s been an entire week; he must want to go home, right? so you ask, “hey, jungwon?” he perks his head up at your voice, wide eyes giving you his full attention and you melt a little bit unknowingly. “do you know…if we’ll ever go back?” you question and his brows raise in response. he purses his lips into a thin line, breaking eye contact with you to think. he knows his answer is something you don’t really want to hear, but he wants to be honest with you. 

“no… or well, i don’t know. but it’s not so bad here, is it? i think it’s kind of nice…” he answers you, but his voice fades out towards the end of his sentence because he knows you disagree. he sees the way you lie awake in bed, silently hoping to wake up to your childhood bed and return back to high school normally. you, however, don’t expect his answer. yes, it it’s not bad here. but you really miss home and your high school friends, and you feel like you’ll never be used to this new life that you and jungwon were thrown into. you don’t respond to him, and you slump into the couch a little bit. he meets your eyes again, and even though you’re looking straight ahead and not him, he slumps with you and leans a little bit towards you. his scent fills your senses, and if he didn’t smell so good you definitely would have pushed him away immediately. but it’s jungwon, so you don’t. 

he blows your hair in a playful manner, and it sticks to your face annoyingly. “hey!” you laugh as you push hair out of your face, finally meeting his gaze. he gives you a smile that you know and love, a smile that makes you forget what the two of you were talking about earlier. “even if we don’t get out of here, i’ll still be here for you,” he says sincerely, and you know it’s sincere with the way his eyes shine as he looks at you with so much admiration that it makes you feel like jello. you don’t doubt his words for a second, so you nod, giving him a slight smile. “thank you. me too, even though i know i don’t really do much around here,” you mumble, pouting slightly because you feel bad for him taking most of the responsibilities and setting aside his worries for taking care of you and the baby. 

jungwon simply shrugs, “you being here is enough for me.”

another two long days pass, and you’re snuggled up next to the baby in the master's bedroom where you and jungwon sleep. you and the baby are both fast asleep, even though you tried to stay awake until jungwon got home from his work. you’ve stayed up the past week whenever he’d go to work, but you suppose the sleepless nights have finally caught up to you. jungwon announces that he’s home from downstairs, and is appalled to not see you watching television or something in the living room. he assumes something is happening with the baby upstairs, so he quickly rushes up the steps and enters the baby’s room to only find neither of you there. he panics a little, and it feels a little bit like deja vu when you weren’t in bed that one morning. he prays that you didn’t find a way to leave, somehow taking the baby with you. he rushes to your shared bedroom, only opening the door to see you and the baby cuddled up together, eyes closed in a slumber. 

he thinks he must’ve done something in his past life to get such a beautiful sight in front of him, with his own eyes. 

he smiles at the two of you, before deciding to change into clean clothes so he can join you two in the bed. he decides, for just this once, he’ll let himself be selfish and enjoy this domestic moment. you feel the bed dip beside you, and it stirs you awake. you turn around, only to meet the soft eyes of jungwon. “i’m sorry, did i wake you?” he asks quietly, careful to not wake the baby up. you shake your head, “it’s okay. how was work?” you whisper back, and this conversation feels so real, it’s so domestic and you feel sick. mentally, the two of you are still teenagers so even having this conversation feels so surreal and you don’t know if you like it or not. you do know, however, that you like jungwon. you feel pushed to your limit, and everything that has happened made you realize a few things about yourself that you didn’t know before. you couldn’t ask for anyone better to be stuck with. 

“it was alright. are you tired?” he replies. his voice is laced with such genuine concern for you, and you can’t help but bury your head further into the pillow and towards his chest. jungwon’s taken aback slightly with this change of position, but he doesn’t show it, or at least you choose to not point it out. “i like you, so much. it makes me feel physically sick, not gonna lie.” you confess suddenly in a quiet whisper, and this time, it’s obvious that jungwon is shocked. if it weren’t for the silent white noise of the air conditioning and nothing else, he would have missed what you said but the words ‘i like you’ rings in his head and he has to remind himself that the baby is still sleeping beside the two of you. his absence in words make you feel even more sick; did his feelings for you disappear? you can understand it, if that’s the case. being stuck with someone for more than a week makes it easier to stop liking someone. you fear that’s what happened. 

“i literally can’t even believe this right now,” he whispers under his breath, and your head shoots up to look at him. his eyes are brighter than ever, you think it’s brighter than the sun and you can’t look away. “i like you too — even though you already know…but i like you so much too. sorry i make you sick. i’ll always be here to make you feel better, though!” he assures with a sweet, toothy smile. you hate him so much. you don’t understand how he was able to change your feelings about him into a complete 180 degrees, and yes you’re complaining about it but you secretly thank whoever put you both into the future. 

“ugh, you’re disgusting. please kiss me now.” you grin, and he grins back until both of your lips meet in a soft peck. it’s sweet and innocent, and it’s more than what jungwon and you could ask for. “you have no idea how long i’ve been waiting for this moment,” jungwon says cheesily, and you roll your eyes. you make another comment about how those words are so gross but you know you felt a part of you melt. the two of you soon fall into a blissful sleep, wrapped around each other’s arms. it doesn’t occur to either of you that it’s the first time you’re sharing the bed with jungwon, but it doesn’t matter because the next morning when you wake up, it feels like it’s the best sleep you’ve ever had in your life. 

a blaring alarm wakes you up, and when you open your eyes, you find yourself in your own bed again, in your parents house. you rush to get out of bed, checking your mirror, only to see the teenager version of you once again. you smile to yourself, touching your face and you’re relieved. but the feeling is quickly set aside when jungwon crosses your mind again, and you pick up your phone to text him. you then realize you don’t have his number, because you literally hated him. you suck in a breath and decide to get ready for school, because it’s the only way you’ll be able to see him. if you do. 

you put on the first thing you see in your closet, rushing down the stairs and your parents don’t even spare a glance at you, just a “good morning sweetie!”, as if time didn’t pass when you were in a different time. you speed walk to school, and the halls are already all crowded with students talking and walking to their first class of the day. your friend greets you, but you don’t really pay much attention to what they’re talking about, and you ask them, “where’s jungwon?” they give you an odd look, “why’re you looking for him? didn’t you literally tell him that ‘anyone who has to wake up next to him is the unluckiest person ever to exist’ just yesterday?” they quote you, and you roll your eyes, waving them off. “doesn’t matter. have you seen him?” you brush it off, but when you turn your head to the left you see the boy you’ve been looking for. “never mind. gotta go, see you!” you say goodbye to your friend, who is only left staring blankly at your running figure. 

“jungwon!” you say his name as you’re making your way towards him, and his eyes meet yours. it’s only been a night, and you’ve never missed someone this much before. he smiles upon seeing you, and the two of you meet in a hug. “how did we get back?!” you ask ecstatically, but you honestly don’t care about how. you’re just happy that you’re both back with newfound perspectives of each other. he shrugs his shoulders and laughs, “i don’t know! i guess a kiss solves everything?” he jokes and makes puckering lips to you. you scrunch your nose up, holding your hand in front of his face as you feign disgust. “shut up, i hate you,” you mumble. 

you both know it’s a lie. 

taglist!: @hafsa-hoofsa-heefs @hyunes4ngel

[moonjxsung]

Hey! What do you think the reaction the skz members be to you being the quiet type during first time. Although you seem to be enjoying.

-🧁

Chan: is a little worried at first. I think he loves hearing that you like what he’s doing, especially if he’s going down on you. Likes to hear you compliment his tongue skills or his massive cock or whatever, and if you don’t, he’s worried that he’s either hurting you or you’re not enjoying it. Definitely the type to ask if you’re okay and comment “you’re a little quiet”, but once he realizes you’re just sorta dazed by the feeling, he’s satisfied. In FACT, it’s even hotter to him knowing you can hardly verbalize anything to him because he’s fucking you so well.

Minho: doesn’t mind. If you’re having sex with him, and you’re not physically asking him to stop or showing any signs that you’re not enjoying it, he’s fine with silence. In fact, he’s a little quiet too, I feel like the room would just be full of panting and groaning while he fucks you. Definitely says a few words here and there to maybe encourage you to verbalize if you like something “this okay?” “Are you close?” But definitely doesn’t care if you just want to moan or nod in response. The fact that you’re both a bit quiet means the sex is even better frfr like you can barely breathe bc he’s fucking you so good.

Changbin: will try to get you to talk- but it turns into him wanting you to desperately moan or gasp in response. At first he wants some form of answer from you, but he quickly finds it amusing when you can’t talk because it feels so good. So then he’s playing with the idea for the rest of the night- “do you want me to do that again?” Right before he slams his hips into yours so that you can’t answer. After the first few times he gets well adjusted to your quiet tendencies during sex and as long as you’re satisfied, he’s happy.

Hyunjin: wants you to be loud. And he won’t hesitate to tell you. “Moan for me baby, say my name”. Won’t necessarily reprimand you for being quiet, but he cums more when you’re at least moaning or begging him to pick up the pace or something. He gets more shy and a little embarrassed when you’re too quiet, so do not be shy to be loud!! Also wants you to beg him to cum inside of you or on you or something- just likes to hear about him reaching his release.

Jisung: he’s loud during sex, so he’s embarrassed if you’re quiet. He’ll bring a hand up to his mouth to stop his own whimpers and then apologize for being so loud. But mostly he wants praise. “Am I doing okay? Does that feel good?” It doesn’t even have to be some complicated answer, just hearing “yeah, that’s good” is enough for him. He just wants to know if he’s doing a good job and he definitely wouldn’t mind if you ordered him around during sex.

Felix: he would hate you being too quiet :( not like where he holds any animosity toward you, but he loves communication and that doesn’t stop when it comes to sex! Tell him he’s doing a good job, tell him what you like and what you don’t like, ask him about what he likes, etc. it’s more fun for him when he can have a genuine communication with somebody during sex, so being quiet just makes him feel like you’re either not enjoying it or you’re somehow mad at him or something. Also loves praise like Hanji does, especially if he’s trying something new. Just a yapper in bed fr 🫶

Seungmin: doesn’t mind. Do whatever you want tbh, he’s going to fuck you whether you feel like moaning for him, whether you feel like being quiet or talking about your day or whatever. He does match your energy, he’ll talk if you want to, but there’s no requirement for it when it comes to sex. In fact sometimes he’ll go so far as to ask you “are you gonna talk today, or just be quiet and take it?” And he can find a way to make it sort of degrading at times (in the best way possible) but he’s still sweet about your decision.

Jeongin: he likes a little bit of both- tell him what feels good, but when he starts picking up the pace and really getting into it, there’s no need for anything except for you to enjoy yourself. Just knowing you’re comfortable and reciprocating his energy is enough for him. He does like talking during foreplay though, so definitely tell him he’s doing a good job and get a few moans in there for him, but he likes whatever feels natural to you.

[ohdeerfully]

Hi! Can I request Alastor x NonBinary!Reader? Like how would he react/learn about it?

hii sure thing! heres some headcanons! i struggled to write a decent bit because i honestly dont think he would care (or understand) at all, but i hope you like 'em!

Alastor x Nonbinary!Reader

Alastor x Reader (headcanons)

TW: brief mention of transphobia, but nothing upsetting or graphic join my discord!

◈ ══════════ ◈ ══════════ ◈ ══════════ ◈

Tbh i dont think Alastor really understands the concept of gender outside of male/female

But he would support you either way

Probably finds out through one of the other hotel residents who correct him on a pronoun

Or he saw you looking at your body in the mirror, upset about something

“Why do you look so critically at yourself?”

You hesitated to tell him at first

I mean, he died in the ‘30s. People who died in the modern age are still super transphobic so you were terrified what he would think

You started with explaining how you felt dysphoric sometimes, like things in your body just didn’t fit

He made an awkward comment about how your figure was great, that you were a beautiful (man/woman)

Then you tried to explain how that was the problem, how you didn’t want to be labeled that way

 If you prefer to look androgynous, he would actually surprisingly understand the idea. Sort of. 

“Ah, like Angel Dust! Not an issue, my dear” obviously referring to the male with feminine features

I mean, kind of. Though you preferred not looking one way or another, you could tell he was trying his best to act like he understood

As an overlord in hell, he’s got much bigger things on his mind than worrying about what gender identity somebody else had. It wasn’t that big of a deal to him

Still, he makes sure those around you respect your identity because he knows it’s important to you. Demons in hell can be unnecessarily cruel, so he will hit them back with equal cruelty, either physically or verbally

Nobody can disrespect his partner like that >:(

Definitely the type to say something like “um excuse me she goes by they/them” 

He tries though

if you changed your name, it wouldn't take him long to catch on and kind of just forget your deadname

it isn't uncommon for people in hell to go by a different name, so this wasn't any different

Affirmations go crazy when he notices you feeling particularly bad about your figure

Though, he usually opts to just take you out to get your mind off of it 

He’s not the best at comfort, but you appreciate the gesture

Rosie has definitely made fun (polite) comments about you and him being a queer couple, though Alastor doesn’t understand these At All

“Huh :D?” is a general response from him

Again, whether or not he fully understands the concept of gender binaries, he would care for you just the same as before

[hadesrise]

meet the addams.

previous part.

summary ➳ the bat family meets the addams family

pairings ➳ jason todd x addams!male reader

warnings ➳ fluff, strong language, pet names, hesitant bruce, weapons, typical addams family behavior ( homicide, dark humor, weird, etc ), jason and reader being a simp for each other, the addams being wholesome as always, implied reader’s atheism (i think the entire addams are atheist tbh), mention of torture

author’s note ➳ wow, hades updated !! shocking, i know. i'm sorry for the long hiatus and inactive, i wasn't okay and it was difficult for me to write when my mind was in such a messed up state. mental health can be a bitch, you know :D i'm trying to recover, and went back on writing again. hope this was a good comeback.

Letting his family meet you hadn’t crossed Jason’s mind at all until that very day when his annoying older brother caught him by the ice cream truck buying a dark chocolate and a mint chocolate flavored ice cream.

Dick was on officer duty patrol in undercover civilian clothes that afternoon, walking around the streets of Gotham in hopes of catching some shady business going around the city or just someone doing a simple act that goes against the law, being a good police officer that he is. Though, instead of seeing criminals like he assumed he would, his most rebellious little brother dressed in bad boy-ish clothes as usual buying ice creams caught his eyes.

He was supposed to walk right past since there really is no reason to approach Jason, but seeing him sit down next to a mysterious, old fashioned, well-dressed, expensive looking guy in all black with sunglasses resting on the bridge of his nose and give the dark chocolate flavored ice cream to? Now, Dick certainly can’t walk past without knowing about you because he’s a little shit who just can’t help but stuck his nose into his brother’s business. That and, well, he also found you really cool. There’s not a thing in this world that can stop Dick Grayson from wanting to befriend someone who seems cooler than the Dark Knight himself.

So, in all his glory, Dick approached Jason with his usual charming smile dancing across his lips.

“Oh, god...” Jason groaned in annoyance as soon as he spotted the grinning male, rolling his eyes. Peace seems to never be an option whenever he takes you around the city for simple walks.

“Jason, are you uttering your all father’s name religiously or simply as an expression as of the moment?” Your elegant yet soothing, deep voice speaks out a sentence composed of well thought words and syllables, innocent curiosity behind the gentle tone.

Dick takes a mental note that your way of speaking sounded similar to the way humanity used to speak centuries ago, when everything was still old-fashioned and technologies hardly ever existed. It made him feel like you came from the past, as if he was witnessing the existence of a time traveler. Stopping in front of you two, he gives you a charming grin as soon as your eyes catches his. A hint of curiosity and wonder flashed within them behind the dark shades of your sunglasses before they were gone in an instant, replaced by a questioning look instead.

“May I help you?” You simply asked, but Dick doesn’t fail to notice the sudden drop in your previously soft tone and the piercing, calculated gaze holding wariness as well as subtle suspicion.

“Sorry, I’m Dick Grayson. I was curious about the person Jay’s hanging out with, I couldn’t help myself but approach.” He elaborates himself while trying his best to ensure he wasn’t a threat through body language, relaxing his figure. “I’m sorry if I freaked you out a little.”

Recognition flashed in your face, brows raising only barely to show subtle surprise, “Jason’s older brother. The name’s (Y/n) Addams. It’s a pleasure to finally meet you.” You smiled, and even something just as simple as that looked graceful in Dick’s eyes.

Somewhat unsurprisingly, you were enchanting to look at as everything you do or say was captivating. How Jason managed to pull you was beyond him.

“Nice to meet you too,” He says back with a soft smile.

Even though his little brother hasn’t introduced you yet to their family, at least you seemed to know about them. Hopefully, nothing unpleasant has been said, but Dick doubts Jason would hide his trauma from you, considering how he was leaning to your side now subconsciously, as if being away from you will bring back awful memories.

He was worried about his practically traumatized-for-life little brother living alone, but it appears he didn’t have to worry at all.

“What are you doing here, Dick?” Jason more of grumbled, annoyed that your date has been interrupted. Almost automatically, one of your hands move to settle itself on his thigh to give it a gentle and soothing rub to ease his growing annoyance, while the other held your dark chocolate ice cream that you had begun eating with clean manners. He relaxed in an instant after feeling your touch.

“I think you should introduce (Y/n) to our family, Jay.” Dick suggests with enthusiasm that didn’t match Jason’s, not really answering his question. “They would want to know who you’re going out with. We can all have a dinner together!” There was excitement shining in his eyes as he shrugged his shoulders, trying to remain nonchalant despite his body language practically screaming excited.

Your lover groans, “Why the hell do they have to know who I’m going out with?”

Amusement crosses your face as you smirked, licking off the small bits of ice cream that got on your lips. “I wouldn’t be opposed to that. I’m certain my family will be more than happy to meet them.” Jason gives you a look, to which you responded with an innocent smile. “Oh, mon amour. What could go wrong? I have been looking forward to meet your family, but you’ve never considered to bring me there. It’s a little concerning how you seem too hesitant to let them meet me.” You pout, feigning sadness.

Your lover widens his eyes, panic appearing in them as he gripped your hand that was on his thigh after realizing what you were implying. “That’s not what it looks like, babe! I just don’t want you to meet them ‘cause they can be a bit unbearable. Bruce is the worst person you could ever meet,” He scrunched his nose. “It’s not you I don’t want them to meet, it’s them I don’t want you to meet. There’s a difference. You’re never the problem.”

You chuckled at his quick attempt of elaboration.

Jason feels his cheeks redden at how deeply elegant and amazing your laugh sounded; it never fails to make his heart go haywire even after all this time. You manage to effortlessly make him fall in love with you deeper and deeper every day without even meaning to.

“Worry not, darling. I was just teasing you. I’m far from upset.” Reassuring him, your hand gently cups his cheek to rub the skin comfortingly. “Let me meet them once you’ve gotten rid of your doubts completely, my Jason. It isn’t necessary to rush.” You then let go of his face to push some of his hair away from his forehead before leaning back to continue eating the ice cream.

Dick witnessed a starstruck smile spread across Jason’s lips in an instant, the way his expression was so soft when looking at you, how his emerald eyes that usually held pent-up rage towards the world sparks brightly in love and adoration.

Huh. He’s never seen his brother this happy and content.

Maybe you are Jason’s one true love.

“Dick,” Jason calls out after watching you eat your ice cream with a barely hidden happiness. You looked happy to meet one of his family even though you haven’t said anything, and he was willing to throw away his pride if it meant making you happy.

“Hm?” Dick hummed, smiling when Jason glanced at you and looked back at him.

“Tell the others.”

That was all he needed to let out the excitement he was holding in, beaming at you two. “Right away, little bird!” He doesn’t waste a time to pull his phone out of his pocket, “I’m going then. It was nice meeting you, (Y/n). I’ll text you when!” He waved his hand and walked away, already dialling Bruce’s number.

Jason watched him go incredulously. “Did he just come here to convince me to introduce you?”

You chuckle under your breath, “Perhaps. Your brother has sorted out his priorities well.” However, a frown appears on your lips when you turned to Jason. “Do you genuinely feel comfortable letting my family meet them? We could always cancel, mon amour. There are many other fascinating activities we can bother ourselves with.”

Jason felt his heart swell at your gentle tone and concerned eyes, making him feel loved in many different ways. You don’t even realize that you’re slowly healing his troubled heart with simple things like this. He already knows you love him more than the Guillotine itself (which is a really big deal since nothing except him could ever beat your love for it) as you’ve always told him before, but the way you treat him, talk to him, and look at him just adds so much weight on your words. You don’t just tell him you love him — you show it in the most perfect, best, casual ways.

Intertwining his hand with yours, he brought it up to rest on his chest, hiding how overwhelmed he was with the love for you. “Like what, sweetheart?” Faint amusement laced his tone as he already knew the answer.

“Like slicing or shooting criminals, of course.” You winked before bringing your intertwined hands to press a kiss on his knuckles.

Jason laughs, and you admired the way he threw his head back to let the sound escape. “Knew you would say that!” He wheezed, before calming down to kiss your knuckles just like you did to his. “But it’s really fine, (Y/n). I want to introduce you and your family to mine.” His expression then turns apologetic, “ ‘m sorry if it seemed like I was keeping you in the shadows.”

You shake your head and leaned in to capture his lips in a peck, a gesture to let him know you didn’t mind. “If you were keeping me in the shadows, we wouldn’t be having a date out in the open where any of your family can see me. Don’t be apologetic, chéri. I’m nowhere near upset.”

Letting a smile break out, Jason leans in to kiss you more longer this time before pulling away.

Just like that, you both sat on the bench and ate ice creams in comfortable silence, holding each other’s hand.

Dick, Tim, Damian, Barbara, Cassandra and Stephanie all stood in front of the Wayne Manor with barely contained excitement, waiting for the infamous Addams family and Jason to show up.

Dick was mainly looking forward for his family to see the side of Jason no one had ever seen before, Tim was occasionally standing on his tiptoes to see if any car was nearing, and Damian was keeping himself still but his body practically trembled with excitement due to being a fan of your vigilante persona for a long time. Barbara had a smile on her face with a hint of nervousness, while Cassandra and Stephanie talked to each other to calm their nerves.

Even without research, the Addams family was quite the celebrity family in Gotham because of their richness that seemed to tie with Bruce Wayne, but moreover, they were rather infamous for being “weird” and gothic as those experts for minding businesses that aren’t their own paparazzi claimed. The Wayne family didn’t really need to dive into the deepest parts of internet in their computer; one newspaper — with the front cover of five people with gothic outfits standing in front of the big ass almost-castle-house — dedicated entirely to the weird family already helped.

Only thing they needed to research about was you, and surprisingly, it wasn’t hard to find information about your vigilantism — which is how all of them realized not only was Jason dating the person Damian idolizes more than his own father, but also the one who brutally tortured and straight-up dumped Joker into Arkham Asylum. Needless to say, it kinda made sense to them that Jason’s dating you, though Bruce wasn’t pleased.

The gates being opened to a black limousine caught their attention, making Cass and Steph break their conversation to watch the car drive closer before eventually stopping in front of them. A butler, who took them by surprise due to his seemingly inhuman looks similar to the Frankenstein monster, got out to open the door.

A man wearing a black suit with white stripes was the first to come out of the limousine as he smiles cheerfully at them, helping his wife to step out. Cassandra’s jaw dropped at the beautiful woman with black, long and silky hair who gives them an enchanting, almost hypnotizing smile.

Next to step out were a boy wearing black and white striped shirt and a girl who had her hair braided on two sides. The boy gave them an all too adorable friendly smile, but his sister only held a blank face as she observed each of the Wayne members. Finally, Jason got out together with you, all of them noticing your intertwined hands.

Your lover raised his brows, “Why are you all here?”

“Well, Bruce said we didn’t have to, but we wanted to welcome you here.” Dick shrugged, nodding at you. “Good to see you again, (Y/n).”

“Likewise, Dick.” You smile. “Greetings, ladies, gentlemen. The name’s (Y/n). This are my parents Gomez and Morticia,” Your parents greet them with a nod and friendly smile. “And my siblings Wednesday and Pugsley.” Pugsley waves his hand, enthusiastic to meet Jason’s family, while Wednesday crosses her arms above her chest and simply nods without a word.

Dick was grinning at your siblings because of their adorableness, not even the slightest bit bothered by Wednesday’s lack of emotion. Cassandra and Tim were gawking at Gomez and Morticia, how they seem so perfect and gorgeous, not only each on their own but together as well. Stephanie and Barbara beamed at you while Damian observed Wednesday and Pugsley, but there wasn’t any hint of malice or bad intention in his eyes — just curiosity. The Addams family sure are good looking individuals.

“Uh — hi,” Tim was the first to speak out of the Wayne’s, awkwardly waving his hand because of the fact he felt as if the Addams were ethereal beings due to their beauty. “You... You all look beautiful. I’m surprised.”

Wednesday’s brows raised as you tilted your head slightly to the side, looking confused. Morticia and Gomez exchanges a glance from not knowing what to say, while Pugsley smiled nicely at Tim despite the truth of being called beautiful feels like an insult. Yours and your family’s reaction immediately worried the Wayne children; none of you seemed pleased or happy with the compliment Tim gave, in fact, you kind of looked offended.

Seeing his siblings getting worried that they might’ve done something wrong, Jason clears his throat to catch everyone’s attention and successfully did so. “What he means is you all look deadly and loathsome. He wasn’t trying to offend you in any way, he just isn’t used to our ways of compliment.” He elaborated with a genuine look, and his siblings looked taken aback that he seemed really calm and gentle with you and your family. Jason have always had anger issues; his rage was explosive everywhere he goes and the main victims of it were criminals, but sometimes it was directed entirely at Bruce because of their unpleasant history.

He was never known as a calm person even in the family. Always seemed on edge, like a walking bomb that’s ticking every second, unknown by people how to stop it from exploding so suddenly. However, as Jason stands with you holding your hand tightly, his entire demeanor was almost completely different from what his family was used to. He was as calm as a wind that caresses the Mother Nature so softly in fear of disturbing her and as gentle as anyone who holds a little kitten in their hands — there was no ticking time bomb, just a soft man caring and pouring his heart and love out to his awesome lover. Jason looked comfortable around you and your family, extremely to the point that he hadn’t noticed practically calling himself an Addams. It made his siblings’ hearts swell with happiness.

“Oh,” Morticia sighed in relief, and even just that felt and looked so heavenly. “We’re sorry, my dear. We weren’t aware of that. I was afraid you found us tolerable.”

Tim chuckles, not really knowing what to say. He was visibly confused, though from what he was able to pick up on, negative comments seems to be taken as positive ones in your family. While most of them were confused just like Tim, Damian quickly understood how compliments worked within the Addams and smirked fondly.

Dick finally gathers his thoughts to clear his throat, “Well, let’s go in now, shall we?”

As your family nodded in sync, you turn to Jason while fixing your collar with the empty hand. “Love, do I look menacing? I have to look presentable when meeting your father. I despise looking good.” You stated, checking your outfit and trying to fix where you found unpresentable.

It’s rare to see you fidgeting and uneasy, making Jason smile. He knew you lose your composure only when it comes to him and it made him feel so loved, appreciated, and important. “You always look menacing, babe. Could scare off any children that passes by.” He compliments, bringing up your intertwined hands and kissing the back of yours.

The corner of your lips twitched up, squeezing his hand back as amusement and adoration shows themselves on your expression. “That’s very lovely. This is why I loathe you.”

The flirting between you and Jason was so natural that even Damian wasn’t affected by it — he’s mostly disgusted and cringed out when people flirt in front of him, but for some reason, Jason flirting with you didn’t bother him at all. Perhaps, because it isn’t a modern type of flirting where couples show disgusting amount of PDA or say things halfheartedly just to make their partner feel good, but rather, it’s one that uses old-fashioned yet romantic language which truthfully comes from the heart. You and Jason flirt with respect for each other, where neither of you objectify nor sexualize the other.

There was a clear unspoken understanding between you, which was shown in just this little flirtatious moment. The way you show your love for each other might be old-fashioned and out of ordinary in this modern day, but it’s honestly more romantic than any of the modernized ones.

“You two always flirt,” Wednesday spoke as she swiftly turned around to meet yours and Jason’s eyes. “It would’ve been more perfect if you were holding a human heart and giving it to each other.”

Barbara, Cassandra, and Stephanie all widened their eyes at her opinion — is she telling you to kill someone, take their heart out, and give it to each other to show your love? That wouldn’t be a romance anymore; it’ll be a dark romance.

However, you only shrugged your shoulders while Jason chuckled in amusement, as if that comment was as normal as seeing trees and nature everywhere. Neither of you were even concerned with what Wednesday said. “There’s precisely a possibility of that occurring, though it’s not yet now.” You responded calmly, as expressionless as Wednesday but slight amusement littered your tone.

The others tensed at your statement with the exception of Damian, who only smirked in pride, as they all remember the news of Joker getting dumped into Arkham Asylum by a vigilante that isn’t Batman. Like mentioned before, Joker was in a really bad shape when he was quite literally thrown into the Asylum, very visible signs of torture coating his body everywhere.

When Bruce visited, it was worse than how the media portrayed it to be. Tongue cut off, fingers broken and two missing, heavily concussed, several cuts along his face and body, and bruises covering most of his body parts. Worst of it all was that Joker didn’t seem like himself anymore; he does laugh — never had been a time when Joker didn’t laugh — but it wasn’t his typical laughter. All the mockery, self-confidence and cockiness weren’t there. Instead, fear and paranoia filled the laughter Bruce was so used to hearing. It was so uncharacteristic and very unlikely of Joker.

He’s finally put behind bars for good, but how the fuck can a vigilante absolutely destroy the Joker? He was indestructible yet you managed to break him so bad that his insanity got flooded with immense fear rather than the urge to kill everyone and everybody for no reason.

And as they stand in front of you now, none of them can even imagine how such a gentleman like you could’ve broke him completely. You seem so respectful, sweet, gentleman, and lovely that it’s almost impossible to believe you were the one who did it. But everyone should always expect the unexpected, right?

“Dick,” Jason’s voice snaps the oldest boy out of his own thoughts as he nods his head towards the door. “Let’s go in.”

The Grayson only hummed, turning around to open the door and gesture inside with his other hand, bowing a little to show respect. Morticia and Gomez smiled pleasantly and brightly, touched by his manners as they enter. Wednesday followed next with a usual expressionless face, and Pugsley said “thank you” first before entering, then Jason pulled you along with him at last. The door closed behind Damian who was the last to enter.

“Welcome,” Bruce immediately greeted as soon as all of your eyes met his, and your parents doesn’t hesitate to smile respectfully and kindly at him.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Wayne.” Gomez steps forward with his hand extended to shake Bruce’s hand before gesturing to his wife standing beside him. “She’s my wife Morticia and these are my children. Perhaps, you already know about (Y/n)?”

Bruce’s unreadable gaze shift from your father to you, attempting to figure out your characteristics by just looking. However, despite the nervousness you’re feeling, you didn’t fail to compose yourself and appeal confident with the usual emotionless expression on your face. Your gaze sparkling darkly under the light made him feel uneasy somehow, as if you knew all of his dirty little secrets and his entire characteristics as well as personality and attitude without analyzing that much.

Truth be told, you heard Bruce’s attitude from Jason when he opened himself up to you. Your Beloved was extremely traumatized by what happened with Joker that it affected the way he saw the world; it should’ve been that way too with Bruce because he’s Jason’s adoptive father — yet what really happened was the complete opposite.

Bruce may not have had an ill intent of dismissing or ignoring what happened to Jason, but to continue living like Joker didn’t kill his second son made him unlikable on your list. You’re a very respectful person as Gomez and Morticia didn’t raise you to be an awful entity, and you would never want to go against your lover’s adoptive father — although, that does not mean you accept his morals.

Hiding the unsettled feeling building up in his stomach, Bruce attempts to smile at you and shake your hand. “So you’re (Y/n). I’ve only ever heard once about you.”

Only the corner of your lips twitched, a barely formed smile appearing as you shake his hand, eyes still piercing through him like a dagger. “And I’ve heard a lot of... things about you, Mr. Wayne.” The calculative tone in your voice set an alarm within Bruce’s head and he would’ve pulled his hand away from your grasp if it wasn’t for his conscious mind forcing himself to calm down. “Be not afraid — You’ll see no judgement here.” You gave him a pointed look.

Jason quickly goes behind you and wraps an arm around your waist, the soft look on him being noticed by everyone present in the room. “Babe, let’s have dinner first. You’ll absolutely love Alfred’s cooking. They’re hella tasty.” He compliments, winking at Alfred who stood at the side. Alfred smiled with gratitude.

Bruce notices the way a small bit of light shine on your dead-like eyes as soon as you looked at Jason. “Well then, may we?” You shift your soft gaze from Jason to Bruce as you tilt your head slightly to the side.

From then on, the peaceful dinner began with mainly your parents and Bruce sharing thoughts about their own children while the others watch with a smile as Damian starts a conversation with you, the one he idolizes the most. It’s surprising to see Damian being really talkative — for the first time ever, he was being an actual child, asking you questions after questions with his eyes sparkling in joy. Not wanting to ruin this seemingly precious moment for Damian, everyone just decided to listen and chime in only once in a while when they feel like it. You were extremely patient with Damian the entire time he was bombarding you with questions, answering all of them without getting annoyed.

Jason felt relieved to witness the dinner going smoothly.

Truth be told, he was secretly worried about it turning into a disaster due to your vigilantism — Jason knew how Bruce felt about you after realizing you were the unnamed vigilante that nearly killed the Joker, and he thought Bruce would bring it up right away soon as dinner started. Luckily, he didn’t. It made Jason sigh in relief and relax on his seat, smiling as he watched you talk with his siblings.

However, perhaps it was too soon.

“(Y/n), how long have you been a vigilante?”

Jason immediately froze at Bruce’s question. The chit-chatting within the dining hall quickly falls into silence as everyone, too, froze — except the Addams family, who were still eating calmly and quietly, unbothered.

You first swallowed the food you were chewing before wiping your mouth elegantly with a napkin and not even hesitating to meet Bruce’s piercing eyes. “Since I was a child, Mr. Wayne.” You answered simply.

Bruce leans on the table, taking it slow. “Why did you become one?”

You felt Jason squeezing your hand under the table, as if to say you don’t have to answer everything. Though, you still did. “One of our ancestors was a vigilante, although he was hanged alongside his wife’s burning body when a rumour spread that she was a witch. He’s quite the legend within our family, you see.” Dick, Stephanie and Barbara’s jaws dropped. “I could say I was inspired by him. Although the sole purpose of my vigilantism is to bring justice to those who were rejected, neglected, and ignored by our unpleasantly ridiculous, worthless justice system.”

Feeling nervousness radiate off of Jason from how he squeezed your hand even more strongly, you gently hold and knead his hand to give him relaxation. After he stopped squeezing and slightly calmed down, you readjusted his hand so your and his fingers would intertwine with each other. You could feel him staring, but you never avoided eye contact with Bruce.

“To bring justice...” The Billionaire trails off meaningfully, as if it was something he wasn’t expecting to hear from you. “Was that your way of bringing justice?” The sharpness in his tone clearly gave everyone an idea of what he’s talking about.

However, despite the tension thickening and Bruce’s eyes narrowing in judgment, you kept your composure with an expressionless face, nerves surprisingly as calm as water flows. There wasn’t anything you were feeling at the moment, just the patience you need to deal with Jason’s shallow-minded father.

“I’m most definitely certain yours and my understanding of justice varies.” You immediately responded without missing a beat. Bruce’s eyes pierced through you, but your (e/c) eyes were much worse. It was reading him thoroughly, looking into his soul, his mind, feeling as if you knew everything.

“Though, I must admit for everyone’s knowledge, just so no one is left unaware — I tortured Joker not to seek justice for my lover, but to feed my vengeance and urge to revenge.” Your dark eyes glinted in amusement under the lights as the confession slips from your mouth with no restraints, like you’re just talking about nonchalant things. That’s not the only thing that made a cold shiver run down everyone’s spine; it was also the way your supposedly expressionless face completely shifted for the first time only to form a dark, prideful, egotistical look, accompanied by a smirk which obviously stated you weren’t regretful.

Now, there’s no way Bruce would take it lightly.

Sensing the events had turned out more worrisome, Jason tries to tug on your intertwined hands. “(Y/n), sweetheart, we should—”

Your cold gaze avert towards him, and it softened only a bit. “Apologies for interrupting you, my love, but leaving our dinner without finishing them would be disrespect to the person who cooked them for us.” You placed a gentle kiss on the back of Jason’s hand to assure him. “Worry not so much. Your father and I are only getting to know one another.”

As soon as your cold and piercing eyes returned to him, Bruce immediately feels an unsettling feeling in his gut as his heartbeat quickens. He could see it’s easy for you to deal with him or this kind of confrontation — the dangerous thing he noticed about you is that you never lose composure and patience regardless if the situation at hand benefits you or not. The only time you’ve probably ever lost your collectedness was with Joker, whom you actually had every right to get absolutely livid at. You love Jason more than words could ever tell, Bruce can easily see that, but your actions not lining up with his morals made it difficult for him to accept you willingly.

While the Addams simply minded their own business by continuing to eat, the others couldn’t find it in themselves to act like there was no tension rising in the air. They knew this confrontation was coming, but witnessing it unfold before their own eyes isn’t easy. Most of them had to swallow the lump that formed in their throat, with Damian being the only one who isn’t nervous in the slightest.

“Mr. Wayne, I have a deep understanding of your morals and the regulations you’ve set in this home... how none of your family is allowed to kill criminals.” You stated with a smile that was barely visible, though respectful nonetheless. However, it instantly vanishes. “But I must remind you one thing — just because you believe your morals are correct does not make it righteous in any way.”

That certainly struck a core in Bruce.

“We, humans, are incapable of finding the correct morals that all of humanity would agree on. You may believe your morals are absolute and there could be a wonderful soul who has developed the same belief as you, but it would never be everyone.” Your hand gracefully gestures to the people in the dining room to emphasize your point before it comes to rest on the table as you intertwine it with your other hand. “You see, humans are not humans without distinctive differences, and pushing your own standards on others likely causes more harm than it should help put them in control.”

The way you’ve said every word with such grace and elegance was nothing but fascinating as everyone found themselves suddenly voiceless. Your every gesture and movement showed an exquisite manner no other human beings were blessed with, alongside your use of sophisticated language that silently told your high level of intelligence. Other than that, Bruce was speechless from how much your words contained truth and wisdom only a philosopher has. He had never seen nor met someone so wise as you.

Perhaps, that’s why you’re so intimidating — every bit of your intelligence and attitude is your very own power no one else could ever have.

Taking a deep breath, Bruce clears his throat to find his voice and meets your eyes. “Are you implying I should accept how different yours and my morals are?”

“Precisely,” You answered without hesitation, sipping the wine Jason had poured for you when the dinner started. “My morality is concerned with the victims, not the perpetrators nor myself. Your morality is concerned with your inability to control your murderous urges when committed.” Bruce inhales sharply, making your eyes glint since he proved you right.

Gomez and Morticia smile to themselves as they felt proud of how you’re always able to point out things others usually don’t or can’t. Despite your brutal honesty, there is clearly respect within the way you speak to Bruce, which is why neither of them stopped you from defending and proving yourself. Helping you was not in their options; they knew you can handle yourself perfectly fine with the number of times you’ve put people in their place physically or verbally.

“(Y/n), baby... It’s okay,” Jason quietly attempts to stop you, knowing those words were intentionally spoken to strike a nerve in his non-biological father.

He knew how your blood boiled when you found out Bruce didn’t kill the Joker because of his ridiculous morality. He can still remember the way your eyes always darkened at even the slightest mention of Batman or Bruce Wayne. It took two years for you to overcome your wrath on the billionaire before you went after the Joker.

Before you could respond to your lover, Bruce caught your attention again with a simple question — “Why did you do it?”

You look back at him, seeing him staring at you and waiting for an answer. The corner of your lips lifted. “Well, wouldn’t we do anything for love?” Bruce's brows raised at the warm look on your face, not knowing your face was capable of making such expression. “No one hurts my soul and live freely without heavy consequences.” You shrugged, looking heavily smug.

Wednesday scoffed, “You should’ve just put a curse on him. It would have saved you all the trouble and exhaustion.” She looked at you as if what you did was the most incorrect thing in the world.

“No, should’ve electrocuted him!” Said Pugsley with a grin. “It didn’t make me insane when Wednesday did it to me, but it could break his mind.” Everyone’s face shifted into a look of shock at the sudden revelation.

“Now now, children.” Morticia interrupts, “What (Y/n) does to his enemies should be decided by him and him only. You don’t decide for (Y/n).”

“Well, Joker hurt Jason and he’s our brother. Nobody hurts my brothers and lives.” Wednesday responded immediately with empty eyes seeking vengeance, stabbing the steak with a fork and making Dick, Tim and Stephanie flinch.

You threw a knife at her with a single flick of your wrist, just narrowly missing her face, stabbing the wall behind her. She doesn’t flinch and instead gives you a look, which you ignore and reach for another knife to cut your steak with. “Manners, Wednesday. If you wish to stab something, search for someone that would be worthy of it, not a supper.”

“You missed on purpose,” Wednesday complains, annoyed.

You sarcastically smile, “Perhaps, I wouldn’t intentionally miss again if you’re respectful towards a supper.”

She glared, “Miss again and I’ll dump you in a paint full of pastels.”

You just rolled your eyes at her tactics while Jason bursts into laughter, knowing how much you and your family hate pastels. To the Addams, pastels and joyful people are the most insufferable matters in the world. There’s nothing you all hate more than that.

His father and brothers couldn’t believe what happened in front of them. None of the Addams, even Jason, cared that you just threw a knife at Wednesday. In fact, your parents were far from concerned as they only watched with warm smiles on their faces, because truthfully that was just you and Wednesday bickering. It’s nothing serious although others might disagree.

“Apologies for our children, Mr. Wayne.” Morticia says casually after Wednesday had returned to eating her dinner, making Bruce turn to look at her. “They’ve always bickered even when they were just a child. (Y/n) and Wednesday in particular, they liked to attempt burning each other alive ever since hearing the story of one of our ancestors who got burned at the Salem Witch Trials. Children love those stories, you know.” She places a hand on her chest, right above her heart, smiling at her children.

“Wait, hold on— You tried to burn each other alive?” Dick was the one who questioned what everyone couldn’t find their voices to ask about, too shocked and horrified that attempting to kill each other seems so natural and normal within the Addams family.

“Yes, for the record.” You answer without looking up. “Being burned alive is classified as the most painful, agonizing way to die, which is why it had been the perfect punishment for those who were accused of witchcraft in 1692 and 1693. My sister and I were intrigued to see whether this was a fact or just merely false information, so we would always attempt to burn each other in hopes of discovering the truth.”

“Funny thing is, they never did.” Jason cackles as Wednesday shot him an unamused look. “(Y/n) still wishes he could die being burned alive, though.”

The corner of your lips merely twitched in a soft smile as you kissed the back of Jason’s hand affectionately, eyes closed. “Have I ever mentioned I want you to do the honor?” You say with such a loving and adoring tone that Jason felt his heart swell, knowing this is somewhat a proposal that only an Addams would understand.

It was a traditional Addams way of showing they love the person rather than wrapping it up in just three words that rarely comes from the bottom of one’s heart. You would die for him, and only he could bring your ultimate demise, no one else. You were offering him your heart and soul, as well as life, permitting him to hold and treasure it for the rest of your lives. It was an implication that you would dedicate your life to him with nothing in return — you will do everything for him. It’s easy to kill — you’ve nearly done it with the Joker — but it’s not easy to live and die for him, but you will and you would.

Feeling overwhelmed with all the love you endlessly give and show, Jason couldn’t help but hide behind his empty hand in an attempt to hold his tears in, always being emotional whenever he gets the love he doesn’t think he deserves. But he does. You’ve never failed to show him he deserves everything you offer. God, how did he even end up with you? You’re so good to him, so loving and giving, Jason didn’t even expect you’ll be like this back when you two were just strangers building friendship. Jason can’t let you go anymore, and he would never even if you asked him to. He loves you just as much as you love him, although yours seem bigger than his.

The Wayne family witnessed Jason, the usually insufferable Todd who thrives off of violence, cry at the mere love and affection his lover gave. Jason was crying because you reminded him of how significant he was to your life. The big bad wolf, the ruthless Red Hood, the boy who had an immense thirst for vengeance, the boy whose blood is filled with utmost rage towards the world, was crying at the simple showcase of love.

And that’s how Bruce — no, his entire family — knew they failed to love him enough.

But they don’t have to make it up to him anymore. They can’t, because you’re already showering him with love and adoration and appreciation and everything he deserves. You did everything what they were supposed to do — what Bruce was supposed to do.

“Oh, mon amour...” You let go of his hand to gently hold his face with both hands, kissing away the tears that overflowed from his eyes. Jason stayed still, relishing how good you are, how soft you treated him as he gripped your gentle hands. Once you’re done kissing his tears away, he buried his face into your chest while wrapping his arms around you, embracing tightly. You kiss the top of his head, caging him in your arms as you gently run your fingers through his hair.

Jason closes his eyes within your embrace, inhaling your calming scent mixed with a cooling hint of cologne. It’s funny how you’ve always associated yourself with death and darkness, yet for Jason, your mere presence is a light at the end of the tunnel that makes him alive every day. “Thank you, (Y/n)...” He murmurs into your chest, barely audible, but heard by you nonetheless.

You gently scratch his scalp, not caring about your meals and attention solely focused on your lover. “For what exactly, chéri? I have not done anything for you to give me such gratitude, at least not that I remember. I have only been attempting to drown you in my love and affection, haven’t I? Are they worthy of your gratitude?”

He chuckled, “You know damn well they are.”

You tilt your head, a smile tugging at your lips. “Even so, do you truly believe it’s significant for me more than just your presence?” Jason slowly looks up at you, his mesmerizing eyes meeting yours, before shaking his head quietly. A satisfied look crosses your face at that, “There you go. It isn’t difficult to figure out now, is it?” Jason shakes his head, burying his face into your chest once again.

As you continue to comfort Jason, Damian stares at the sight with a weird look. “Todd is extremely quiet when he’s around (Y/n). It’s... weird.”

Dick nudged him, “Hey, let him be. Jay’s probably just very comfortable with him.”

“It’s still weird, though.” Tim insists.

Barbara and Stephanie watched with smiles while you kiss Jason’s forehead, too willing to accept you despite finding your family quite strange. People have different traditions and cultures anyway; they figured yours are just too extraordinary and unusual that don’t fit society’s standards. Being different doesn’t matter when it’s clear that you love Jason too much, in your own special way.

Cassandra glances at Bruce, who seemed to be in deep thought. “I don’t think you have any other choice but to accept him.” Her voice snaps him out of his thoughts, “Look at them. They’re very much in love. More than in love, I’d say. It looks like they were meant to be with each other. Like destiny’s the one who wrote them together.”

Bruce looked at the two of you, who obviously saw nothing but each other in your little world.

“Besides, he basically called bullshit on your morals. And you know all too well he’s beyond right.” Cassandra smirks, “I hope your pride doesn’t get in the way of welcoming a new member, dad.”

Bruce sighed.

Well, it’s inevitable that you’ll be a member one way or another. Cassandra was right about that, and although he didn’t want to admit it, Bruce knew he accepted you the moment you stood up against him. It’s not always there’s someone who is brave enough to speak up against the Bruce Wayne.

Though, he may have to teach you not to strangle literally every single person who mess with Jason.

© ᴀʟʟ ʀɪɢʜᴛs ʀᴇsᴇʀᴠᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ʜᴀᴅᴇsʀɪsᴇ. sᴛᴇᴀʟɪɴɢ, ᴘʟᴀɢɪᴀʀɪᴢɪɴɢ, ᴏʀ ᴜsɪɴɢ ᴍʏ ᴡᴏʀᴋs ғᴏʀ ᴍᴏɴᴇᴛᴀʀʏ ɢᴀɪɴ ɪs sᴛʀɪᴄᴛʟʏ ᴘʀᴏʜɪʙɪᴛᴇᴅ. ᴀsᴋ ᴘᴇʀᴍɪssɪᴏɴ ʙᴇғᴏʀᴇ ʀᴇᴘᴏsᴛɪɴɢ ᴏʀ ᴛʀᴀɴsʟᴀᴛɪɴɢ.

[madschiavelique]

was a bit hesitant to ask this but thoughts on how Miguel would feel if reader was vv self conscious abt their body/said anything negative abt their appearance..? (talking abt this as someone who's also self conscious abt their body cuz i need to know how he would react/what he would say to the reader tbh 😭)

AAAAAAA BESTIE I FEEL YOU !! I'm part of the self conscious about their body gang - i just had to write more than just a thought on this<3

when it comes to self consciousness about my body, there's always one line from the song Paradis by Orelsan (french rapper), that says "Je comprends pas pourquoi tu t'inquiètes quand tu prends du poids. Pour moi, c'est ça de pris, ça fait toujours plus de toi." which i used in this text (clue : it'll be in italic)

summary : miguel reassures a self conscious reader on their body content warnings : comfort, fluff, miguel being a worshipper of you, genderneutral!reader, no use of Y/N word count : 739 tag list : @fandom-ash

Miguel is a man who notices details, all the more so when those details are related to you. He noticed how you looked at yourself in the mirror from time to time, how you sometimes stood on your tiptoes when you were sitting to make your thighs look less large, how some days, even when it was hot, you wore a sweater covering you completely.

You were used to wearing baggy clothes, oversized sweaters and t-shirts, baggy pants, nothing that showed too much of your curves.

He'd noticed how you'd changed your diet lately, and how the portions you allowed yourself were... far too small for a normal meal.

You were depriving yourself of your favorite snacks, and even when Miguel offered you some, you begrudgingly refused. He could see the pain in your eyes, and he couldn't understand.

Then one day, standing in front of the mirror in your underwear, you started to cry. Miguel came running straight to you, taking you in his arms as you wept silently, little jolts shaking your body.

He stroked your back and hair gently, letting the sobs take their place as you sniffled against his shoulder.

"Hey hey hey," his voice was low, as if he felt that a word or a gesture a little too strong could break you into a thousand pieces, "nena, what's wrong?" he asked, stepping back.

He wiped your tear-streaked cheeks, your eyes were reddened and your lips bulged with heartache.

"I hate my body."

His heart cracked, and he came to take you in his arms again. So that was the reason for all this, for your restrictions, for all these choices that were doing you more harm than good. He couldn't understand how you could think such a thing, because he worshipped you like the goddess or god or deity you truly were.

"I wish I just looked different," you murmured against him.

"Why?" he asked, pulling away from you again to cup your face.

"Because, I look ugly, I feel ugly..." you sighed, your brow furrowing as hot tears rolled down your cheeks.

His lips were parted, he couldn't understand how it was possible for you to feel this way, to think this way about yourself. He found you so beautiful that the very thought of you thinking that way seemed almost impossible.

"I'm not pretty enough to be with you. There are so many prettier girls and boys than me-" you began, but he cut you off, not even letting you finish your sentence.

"Don't ever say that again," he said, his tone serious and almost warning.

He looked at you, sorry and almost angry. Because he was wondering who he was going to have to correct (annihilate) for having succeeded in making you think you weren't beautiful.

"Come here," he said, lifting you with ease to rest you on the sink while you were still wiping your cheeks. "Listen to me: Your body is not the reason I love you. I've fallen in love with your soul, your qualities and your flaws... even if I'm still trying to find the flaws."

You blew out a quick laugh from your nose, a tear running down your cheek as he brushed it away.

"It doesn't make you a failure, or undesirable, or ugly not to have the body of a celebrity on the cover of a magazine." he said softly as he kissed your cheek, his hand gently caressing your thigh. "Why should you worry about gaining weight?"

"Because it makes me ugly." you murmured, but he gripped your chin between his fingers so your eyes observed the truth in his.

"No, it doesn't make you ugly," he assured. "Even if you do gain weight, for me it's a given, because it always gives me more of you."

Your chin trembled slightly, and you bit the inside of your cheek.

"No matter how long it takes, I'll make you love yourself," he confirmed. "I don't care what you look like, I'll still love you."

You smiled, tears still gently flowing, Miguel coming to place both his hands on your cheeks to clear them. You let out a little laugh:

"Even if I was a worm?" you joked.

He smiled, sighing softly.

"Yes, even if you were a worm." he laughed, kissing your forehead before hugging you again.

"Lucky worm." you whispered, wrapping your arms around his back.

"Lucky me." he whispered against your hair, stroking it gently.

[genderkoolaid]

Cw: "Aaron" Bushnell https://www.assignedmedia.org/breaking-news/bushnell-gaza-immolation-protest-trans-identity

I thought I should let you know if you didn't already. Rip Lilly

While there is evidence pointing to Lilly/Aaron being trans, I still think we should be careful in how we talk about it. I don't really have a problem agreeing that the username and the reddit history does feel like someone who, at least, is exploring their gender identity. A person who says they knew him/her in life is very insistent that s/he could not have been a trans woman based on private information. However, others who have said they spoke with him/her online frequently insist s/he went by Lilly and used she/her and he/him. Although I don't think there's any reason necessarily for those folks to be lying, I do wish there were actual screenshots of the pronoun use in discord servers? Given that rn the conversation is just People Online Making Claims.

I'm still unsure of how I feel we should talk about this tbh. Lilly/Aaron was very deliberate in how s/he presented his/her gender to the public. As the person interviewed says, I don't think Bushnell would be upset by being seen as trans if s/he was a cis man. But even if s/he was trans, I am hesitant to make assumptions about what is best for a trans person's legacy. The issue of trans recognition in death is very sensitive for most of us, so I understand why people are so invested in this. But it should be kept in mind that the discussion around Bushnell's gender should not overshadow support for Palestinians. That was his/her goal and its clear that s/he cared more about that than making a statement about his/her own gender. It is fully possible for a trans person to make the decision to let themselves be assumed cis, and be comfortable in that decision, and its not up to other trans people to decide whether they made the wrong decision with their own legacy.

Its possible s/he made that decision solely because s/he wanted to prevent his/her message from being derailed by transmisogyny. But again, that shows to me that s/he wanted more than anything for his/her death to be focused entirely on raising support for Palestine. I don't want to be patronizing about Lilly/Aarons's decisions and I definitely don't want any Discourse on this to do exactly what s/he was trying to avoid. Additionally, Bushnell is reported as having used he/she pronouns. The person who claims s/he used both uses both Aaron and Lilly. Its very easy for genderqueer and nonbinary people to have their identities reduced to binaries in death, even by other trans people. If s/he was trans, why are we making assumptions about if s/he was fine with being called a woman, or that s/he wasn't okay with being called a man? There is too much grey space and too much exorsexism that goes unchallenged in our community for me to not feel the need to point this out.

Anyways. I guess my Take on this is that both trans and suicidal people tend to have our choices undermined, and have people on all sides debate over what we Really mean and what we Really want. We are rarely seen as being the experts on ourselves, or having our autonomy respected even when it makes others confused or uncomfortable. I don't think anyone online discussing this can have a full picture of The Truth. Like I said, I don't think there's any reason to assume people claiming they knew Lilly and that s/he used she/her and he/him pronouns are lying right now. But more than anything I'm concerned that the debate over this could end up doing exactly what Lilly/Aaron was trying to avoid. And I don't think its my place to insist any trans person has to be out. I want to respect what s/he wanted for his/her legacy. I don't want him/her to be a trans hero if that results in detracting from his/her goals.

I think this is part of larger moral issue trans activists have to deal with when it comes to trans history: when is it okay for us to correct the language someone used for themselves? When is it illuminating and respectful, and when is it whitewashing someone's own self-perspective to fit our goals? Bushnell was extremely purposeful in everything s/he did as a part of his/her suicide, and that includes how s/he presented his/her gender. I don't want to disrespect those decisions.