#so it feels weird to jump in and start analysing stuff that was likely already talked about

[etinceelle]

I rewatched some stuff from RWBY Volume 8 and some specific moments in Volume 9 too, and like. With some distance all of the topic of life and death is truly even weirder. I know I talked about it already, but the contrast between the end of Volume 8 and the overall Volume 9 around death and Penny's death is so strange : they constantly jump from a tragic death to ascension/reincarnation + the Cat being shocked because "goodness no", people don't have to die someday, + "nothing, no one is ever truly lost" and it directly be ABOUT Penny's sword and by extension Penny herself, I mean. And there's this epilogue with Winter feeling guilty about "Penny gone forever" while right before that in the V8 finale Penny tell her she'll be a part of her.

I know things aren't supposed to be always taken literally or to be completely true but still, my senses are tingling it feels like they cook something big but we can't tell or confirm anything and this is soooo interesting and frustrating and so great but AAH --

Just to be clear, even if Penny doesn't come back I'm still enjoying so much theorizing and thinking about the narrative of her character and RWBY, but I mean. Overall I still can't help but think that there's more, truly I don't understand why people don't talk more about this scene in V9 Chapter 5 with the Blacksmith, is it because we saw it in the trailer ? Everytime I saw people react they were like "here we go, the scene from the trailer", but it's MORE than that don't you think ? Of course we saw Penny's reflection in her sword but what Ruby and the Blacksmith are saying is so important too, also why is Ruby able to see Penny's reflection (and Alyx, and Summer as well) in her weapon ? WHY EXACTLY I NEED TO KNOW-

I'm really curious about this scene specifically and I just feel like because a bit of it was in the trailer, not a lot of people are actually thinking about it and understanding what it is and what is said, and WHY. It wasn't even just about Ruby herself here, they started to talk because of Penny's sword. How did it get here ? Was it an illusion ? Or was it real but the Blacksmith changed it ? But in the end, the Blacksmith know what all of these weapons are and who it belonged to before. So she/they have to know more than we think but we can only speculate on everything rn. At this point I'm starting to doubt and analyse everything krkr-

Also, back from Volume 8 : what is really weird that many people talked about already is Penny's Aura during the transfer. WHY is is gold/yellow. It doesn't make sense, is that because of her own body ? Because I looked back at the "creation" sequence with Ambrosius and there's also a gold light when he separates her Aura from her robot body. So is that linked or is it different ? Is that because the place Winter and Penny were is magical/different as well ? Is it because it was easier to make a gold/yellow Aura than a green Aura for the transfer ? But even on Winter who has a blue Aura, it wouldn't be a big change of color or difficult to see at the moment, so I don't really get it.

I don't know if us Penny fans are all losing our brain or if there is TRULY something more to come, but man I'm so hyped for all of these revival theories oh my god xD

[my-lunaberg]

Okay, this confrontation/chase has been going on for too long, Im not sure if Im capable of actual analysis rn so Im just jotting all my thoughts so far down bullet point style

I find it very telling that Dream just got out of prison, where he was almost completely isolated and rarely visited and starved and also actively tortured for about half of his almost year-long time there, and instead of going to his base or finding shelter or resting or anything like that, he seemingly went straight to Logstedshire after getting the gear from Punz. Idk if hes there bc he suspected that Tommy would try and get the axe of peace or bc he wanted to remisce but either way, very interesting

Im too lazy to dig up my old posts where I try to predict the effects that the prison will have on Dreams psyche and I dont really remember what I even said, but I do know that I said the prison would make him a lot more unhinged so I'll take that as a win for me

That being said, Im not entirely satisfied with the way Dream is acting so unaffected by like, the physical torture especially. Yeah sure, it does seem like being trapped in jail for a while was part of Dreams game plan all along somehow, but I dont think Quackitys torture was, judging by how surprised he seemed when he showed up. And even if it was, while I do think of Dream as a pretty deluded character, no amount of delusion is gonna make the Literal Fucking Torture hes endured for months on end not feel like Literal Fucking Torture

When the confrontation started my first thought was "oh, his manipulation tactics are a lot sloppier and a lot more obvious, I feel like Tommy wouldnt fall for that even if he didnt already know that Dream was bad news" but then I thought again and I realized that hes talking in a very similar way to when Tommys exile started, where he just kinda says stuff to try and bring him down because hes so confident in his manipulation tactics that he thinks he can just make Tommy forget all about how he compared him to an annoying bug right before he started saying he was his friend. Now, he got progressively more unhinged over the course of the confrontation, so his attempts at manipulation land even worse but still

Basically, I think hes trying to do exactly what he did at the start of exile which is to say, break him down and make him "his" in some weird way, only that with the exile the goal was to get him on his side and become Dreams protegee of sorts, while this time its mostly just to beat him down and break him like a toy

Idk Ive made a lot of analyses of Dream and one the things i keep coming back to is the fact that he wants absolute control over everything everyone and he cannot handle the loss of that control, but deep down he still desires Challenge and Tommy gave him that. His relationship with Tommy is fascinating because its essentially Dream attempting to reconcile those two fundamentally uncompatible parts of his psyche. However, I dont think he wants Challenge anymore. Even if the stay at the prison was planned, it nevertheless showed him what its like to experience loss of control, to truly eperience being challenged and its clear to me that he doesnt want it anymore and that he just wants to break Tommy down until he listens

This is another complaint that sorta ties into Dream being so unaffected by the torture and a suggestion to 'fix' it. I realize that theyre working with Minecraft mechanics and everything so it doesnt matter that much, but Dream should definitely be having issues with food after being starved and only given raw potatoes for that long and I also dont think he should be able to sprint. I feel like they couldve done something really neat and have Dream be like "no Im not hungry" when Punz gives him those baked potatoes and then later when hes chasing Tommy around maybe he starts out sprinting but after a short while hes just kinda jumping around and you realize that hes starving but hes szill not eating and just keeps following Tommy with his pearls and maybe a trident if he has one rn. Idk just something that couldve been cool

I realize that Tommy is obviously there too and I feel like I shouldve written more about him but honestly, I dont have any thoughts abt him rn, maybe I'll have some later down the line. Idk man, I like c!Tommy a lot but hes not really a character that I like to write analysis posts about (i love reading others analyses though!! I think hes interesting, I just dont have a lot of interesting thoughts about him beyond that sry), while c!Dream very much is lol. I see a lot of myself in and thats definitely part of the reason I enjoy him so much and why I symphatize with him so strongly and why analysing him is so fascinating, its kinda cathartic for me. I know a lot of people in the fandom tend to really dehumanize him, both bc he doesnt have his own POV which makes it easier and bc they seemingly just dehumanize any Bad People in fiction, but its honestly a struggle for me to try and do that too, simply because I am human and I know hes human because we have done similar things for similar reasons (only that hes obviously worse bc its fiction and things get exgerated yknow)

Idk thats about it for now, I just spent like two hours writing this when I probably shouldve just kept watching the video lol

[heloflor]

A few random thoughts/comments after finally reading the Sam and Max comics (Surfin’ the Highway + “The Big Sleep”) :

- I absolutely love how, whenever they’re in town or in an open place, there’s stuff happening in the background. Random details like that don’t really have any purpose in the story but they make the world feel so much more alive !

- I’m really fond of the way Purcell draws Sam for some reason. Idk, his face is just pleasant to look at.

- Max is getting the Pikachu treatment, looking chubby/chonky in the first interpretation of the character only to look thinner later on.

- It’s very interesting to see how the first “official” Sam and Max comic, “Monkeys Violating the Heavenly Temple”, introduces so many moments that became recurring things (“Sam, I mean Max”, Max being the one who needs saving, Max not being into girls, “you crack me up little buddy”, the fight for the phone, Sam’s long-ass “holy-“ lines, Sam being overprotective, Sam finding Max cute etc)

- It’s also interesting to see “Bad Day on the Moon” in comic form and the few differences with the cartoon version.

- I love how everytime they walk to their office door, they check on Flint Paper. Also Max mentioning how Flint probably wasn’t hugged enough 🥺

- I need an entire series of Sam and Max going on a road trip ! Not only can we have small adventures with new environments and characters, there’s also their cute interactions in the car !

- It’s funny to see places and characters you know are going to come back later on in the franchise, like the carnival from “Hit the Road”.

- I kinda like the random intermission in the long comics, though it feels like a random commercial that’s somehow relevant to the comic. Also that page about the board game to play in a car trip with the advice of “if you don’t have dice, just look at the last number of the plaque from the next car that’s coming” is absolutely genius.

- There’s SO MUCH TOUCHING between the two, especially on Sam’s end ! Like, dude can’t keep his hands away from his bunny ! Ok I may be exaggerating here but still ! So much touching ! And between that and other small moments, it makes me low-key question if they were already boyfriends back then 🤔

(I swear “Purcell wanted to create goofy stories with a fun duo but ended up accidentally creating an amazing and healthy gay relationships with pretty good rep overall and ultimately decided to just accept it and roll with it” is my second favorite thing about this franchise)

- Speaking of which, there’s that one moment in the second road-trip comic in which Sam uses Max as a weapon and then immediately asks Max if what he did was alright or if it bothered Max. And I absolutely adore that.

I think it’s due to the fact that, usually, Sam and Max are on the same wavelength and know each other’s boundaries and likes/dislikes. So it’s interesting to “come back to a time” where they still had to understand those boundaries. I also love how asking this is literally the first thing Sam does, showing that there’s really good communication between the two, which could also explain why in later entries they understand each other so well.

(and sure, I know moments like this one happened in other entries of the franchise, like for example Sam in 301 telling Max he's uncomfortable at the idea of Max teleporting alone, but for some reason this panel really stuck with me)

- The office each time having different framed pictures of the duo like in the cartoon 💖

- As someone who loves when anthropomorphic characters behave more like animals, I am so happy that the comics mention Sam smelling stuff a lot and especially Max having good hearing at least once ! Because this is something I really liked to think about, so it’s nice actually getting to see it being mentioned in canon !

Also there’s that one page (I think in “Bad Day on the Moon” ?) where Sam straight-up bites someone and then gets weirded out by his own action. That was fucking amazing.

- Apparently one of Sam’s favorite things during missions is cornering the villain and telling them to freeze with his gun pointed at them. For some reason I really like that fact.

- The comic about the cereal aisle monster has some pretty good action and a cool monster design. Also apparently Max already had weird powers back then with him being able to communicate with the dead.

Also also Max at the end helping a kid while casually talking to Sam was really cute. Fun fact : Max having baby fever and loving kids is my favorite thing about him, especially due to how much it clashes with his usual “wilder” personality (And for those wondering, my favorite thing about Sam is him being protective and going apeshit when Max is in danger).

Also also also it’s pretty funny to see Sam disliking physical contact from the shopkeeper given how touchy he is with Max in those comics.

- There’s a one-page comic about a lady talking about aliens with Sam not buying any of it, and one of the panels is Sam with a glass of water in hand saying “Lady, I’m this close to pouring my drink on you” while looking completely done with this shit. Hands down my favorite comic panel of all the Sam and Max comics.

(Btw, my second-favorite panel is from the first comic, after Max was kidnapped, when Sam is spitting on a portrait of the villain while pointing out how he’s going to destroy him if he took a single hair off of his precious bunny)

- It’s pretty funny how the comics suddenly start having colors at some point out of the blue, like someone randomly gifted Purcell a box of colored pencils. Though, I don’t know what I like most between the black-and-white or the colored comics. On one hand, the colors add to the background. On the other hand, the black-and-white gave a style that’s pretty fitting with the titular characters being detectives/police.

Ultimately, I think I like the black-and-white more, not just because of the style but also because like half of the stories in color are AU stuff (“The Adventurer” comics) while the black-and-white ones are more “grounded” stories.

Yeah, most of the time, I’m not the biggest fan of AUs. I know, pretty surprising for someone whose first fandom was Unde//rtale of all things.

And yes I learned later on that the first comics actually came out in a colored version. That being said I do like the black-and-white version more since, again, it gives them a “detectives” vibe.

- Sam really has a thing for twin popsicles, doesn’t he ?

- Some comics, especially the ones in color, have a few small “mean-spirited” moments between the duo, especially on Sam’s end, and it feels weird to see them like that. Like when one says “shut up” to the other, when Max does something cruel and Sam points it out by actually calling him cruel instead of cute, or when Sam jokingly threatening to hurt Max for being annoying, including the “killing Max and being sent to heaven” comic.

Now I know those jokes also exist in the rest of the franchise, like for example the “I wanna write a reminder to smother you with a pillow in your sleep” from the first Telltale game or the “shut up it’s starting !” from the cartoon, or even some moments in “Hit The Road” like when you rescue Max at the golf game. But for some reason, the ones in the comic stand out more to me.

I think it might be due to the duo dynamic they have and how much more openly affectionate they are in the games and cartoon, making those “I’m going to hurt you” jokes feel insignificant. 🤔

- There’s a comic about Atlantis that opens up with Sam mentioning how he “never dated within my gender” and I don’t know what surprises me the most between Sam unironically saying this, as if open to the idea, or the fact that they used the word “gender” in a comic form the 90s. In any cases, I like it.

(Also I guess this means Sam and Max weren’t together back then ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Unless you picture the comics as taking place out of order, which I might do considering that one Christmas comic with the duo living in a house and having a family dinner. Plus this could explain the “mean-spirited” stuff only being in some comics. Also the cereal aisle comic has a guy from the cartoon + Max having powers, so I could see it taking place around the time of the cartoon, after the Telltale games)

- Sam with abs from that one biker comic is cursed. Chubby Sam with “uncool 40 years-old dad” energy is best Sam.

- And from that same comic, Max gets a tattoo on his right arm. Headcanon that he still has it but it’s hidden under his fur, hence why it’s never visible.

- I love how “The Adventurer Comics”, “The Big Sleep” and the first page of the unfinished comic are just casually available to read on the official Sam and Max website.

- “The Big Sleep” was apparently written around the time of “Save The World”, and I feel like you can kinda see it from the way Max looks in this comic. They removed the chonk in favor of a rounder stomach that resembles his 3D model.

Also I really like how this comic has Sam in danger and Max trying to save him, with Max’s last line of the comic showing some protectiveness. Given how rare it can be at times, I like when they switch around which one needs saving.

Also also this comic has Max calling some guy gay and later on almost saying “piece of shit”. I love it.

Also also also, there’s a cameo of granny Ruth as part of Sam’s memories !!! (along with a picture of Max because of course 💖)

Last thing, since earlier I mentioned the “mean-spirited” moments : this one shows my point by having Sam mentioning bashing Max in the head to help him calm down, with Max reacting by saying “aww, you spoil me !” This is the kind of instance where a joke is actually not mean-spirited because there’s something immediately afterwards showing that Max is enjoying the thought, while in the older comics, it’s just Sam mentioning hurting Max without Max commenting on it, which gives off this “mean-spirited” side.

- There are at least two comics that I’m missing, or at least two that I’m assuming are official. Given how the franchise started with Purcell drawing after his brother’s stories, I’m pretty sure there’s a lot out there that was never published (for those asking, yes I stumbled across some of the earliest versions of those characters from back when Purcell was messing with his brother’s work).

But yeah, from what I know, one of the missing two has a page with Sam and Max pushing n*zis off a cliff, and the second one has a joke about Sam asking Max to remove what he’s wearing and Max refusing, with I think some kind of stereotypical tribe behind them ?

- Thinking about it, I’ve seen people talk about how trigger-happy Sam and Max are in the comics compared to the rest of the franchise, with them being toned down due to age rating. But tbh, I didn’t find them that trigger-happy in the comics, at least not more than the games. They felt pretty on-par with how they act in “Hit The Road” specifically. Might be just me tho 🤔

- Overall, I’d say my favorite comic is “The Big Sleep” due to the whole “Max saving Sam” situation. But more than that, I especially adore how evident it is that Max absolutely loves Sam without outright saying it. It’s shown very well with how worried Max gets, the fact that he greatly compliments the doctor at some point or even the way he decides by himself to investigate the phone because he feels uneasy about the bug and wants to find out what happened to Sam.

This comic aside, the road trip trilogy is a close second and I especially enjoy the moments with the duo in the car, like Sam telling Max a creepy story or them sleeping while still having the car on, etc. I’d probably put the very first official comic as third, mostly for how many recurring things this comic sets up + the usual “Sam saving Max” being nice to see. And the unfinished “Max getting shot” comic would be fourth, because angst is my jam.

[about-faces]

so, i been seeing some of your posts in your livejournal and i love your analyses and reviews. am curious, what do you think about two things? what do you think of Harvey Dent's portrayal in the Dark Knight movie? also, what do you think of Mr. Rogues videos about Two-Face? i think he likes some storylines you dislike, but i don't remember well, check his top 22 Two Face stories to see what i mean. i really like your content, keep it up, the Gilda stuff is awesome!

I see TDK's Harvey as two separate characters: an overall pretty damn good Harvey Dent, and a horribly half-baked Two-Face.

As Harvey, I think he's generally a solid, great take on the character. He's noble, he's heroic, he's tragic, but overall, he's also kind of shallow. He's more of a walking pile of themes and messages than a person, which isn't wholly a bad thing. The fact that he was genuinely heroic really goes a long way with me. But there's not much to him beyond that. It doesn't help that he's a Baxter, the bland other man opposite Bruce, in a relationship with a woman who strikes me as pretty much already being Lady Harvey. The fact that Rachel herself was also underdeveloped didn't exact help matters.

I also think TDK!Harvey is commonly misunderstood as a character, with many people looking at his scene with the Polka Dot Man actor as evidence that he was unstable and coming unraveled. I don't know what the Nolans' intention was, but personally, I firmly believe he's completely in control and bluffing. The scene follows right after Batman breaks Maroni's ankles and threatens to kill him, and Maroni calls his bluff. Bruce and Harvey are the same, both using fear and intimidation to bluff, only Harvey manages to sell it better because his unwillingness to kill isn't well-known. This makes Harvey more interesting, while also making his transformation later more inexplicable and jarring to me.

As Two-Face... he really needed his own movie. I didn't buy his jump to being willing to murder a child within the space of, what, a day or two? Less? Nor did I for one second buy that he was willing to listen to Nurse Joker's oh-so-writerly monologue manipulations, given his all-consuming rage and the fact that he should either be dead with burns like that or at least be screaming in constant agony because he was refusing painkillers what the living fuck Nolans. Two-Face was wasted in order to serve the narrative point of the overall plot, and it only further made him more overshadowed in all regards by the Joker.

As for Mr Rogues, I'd purposely been avoiding his stuff until I'd finally been able to finish projects like my own Top 22 list (which I started years ago, but now I worry people may see me as ripping him off). My Henchgirl told me about Mr Rogues a while back, and how he seems to be a Swedish clone of a younger me, from our interests right down to our physical appearances! It's weird.

Skimming through his own Top 22, he has a lot of my own choices, but there are a lot of differences too. And even the ones I dislike, I can understand why he included them. I’ll actually sit down and watch it properly when my own list is finally posted, but I appreciate that there’s someone else out there who seems to care enough to put out Two-Face critical content like that. I just wish I had the spoons to keep up with it myself!

Speaking of which, thank you for saying that about the Gilda content! I’ve had a very hard time getting back to those because I wasn’t really seeing much new interest in those posts, and coupled with seasonal/regular depression, I was feeling very discouraged. So I really appreciate that, thank you!

[poetofthedyingstars]

each dps members favorite SRR’ movie episode story, yet another filipino content.

not everyone's a fan of horror, that's for sure. but when in comes to tight and close friendships, nothing is ever more fun and satisfying than watching good horror movies with them.

i'd like to think meeks and pitts were an avid fan of this movie franchise, probably one of the things that made them closer when they were just in acquaintance/talking stage. they also love regal shocker!!

neil thinks horror movies are neat and the actors are always amazing but doesn't watch too many of them so he had only heard srr and saw some.

im still wishy-washy with todd. i'd like to think he loved horror movies but sometimes is too anxious to watch it.

knoxxie, my boy, who thought john keating is creepy on his first class, that's a hint that he WATCHED way too many movies when he was a kid. bet he thinks everything's weird and jumps to conclusions way too often (affectionate)

“oh yeah nope i already watched that on a horror movie once so no i will not be doing that”

charlie?? belongs to that big percent of horror movie lovers that uses it to cope with childhood traumas. yeah

cAMERON? i can't decide, i think he watched a handful of them. comments and analysed it. but eh, he prefers some other genre.

SO, now that we've discussed that lets jump to the main point of the thing

(take note i love this movie franchise but im either too busy or nervy to have the time to watch all of them + it's so hard to find a good filipino film streamer. tell me if u know one.)

meeks

meeks favorite movie was the earlier ones! his most favorite episode is LRT from SRR VIII. i mean manilyn reynes? she's literally part of the scream queen squad of the filipinos (and i mean being one of the most finest leading ladies in horror movies). plus, inspired by a manila urban legend? yes. sure. perfection. absolutely. flesh eating monster and terrifying ending??? yep. personally, im terrified by this episode. i don't recall much about it but im feeling VERY scared about it. it's scary. meeks love every single thing about but ever since he watched it, he, sometimes, feels very different riding on LRT. he makes sure when he transport thru LRT, he's with a companion (pitts) or never ride the LRT ever. meeks also love the undin episode. again, manilyn reynes and, who doesn't like the undin episode????

pittsie

like meeksie, pitts love the earlier episode ones !! as much as i hate that episode i feel like he'd like pridyider. janice de belen was the lead in this, i think. janice de belen one of our scream queens. love a good janice de belen horror movie. pittsie also loved the anak ni janice movie btw !! this episode is literally too scary im not even gonna tell you why pitts love it. im just gonna shut up. he also love punerarya the one with the u know *spoiler* cannibal aswang kids with carla abellana as their tutor

neil

this kid, like i said, only saw some and by some i meant like the most recent or the popular so i feel like if he gets asked what's his favorite RSS episode, he'd say the flight 666 (or anything with carla abellana) but flight 666 is the one with lovie poe and that tiyanak baby. yep. that shits wild.

todd

todd and i are the same. we're basically the same. like shhh. so his favorite episode? nothing. why would he pick just one? and he's too terrified to relieve the memory so don't ask him what's his favorite episode. but seriously, i think he loves the horror-comedy episode ones like the one with marian rivera and pekto (nieves?) and the thirteenth floor episode.

knoxxie

NOW HOHOHO you know when you get asked by someone what's your favorite things on particular stuff and you just go "oh i love x but like i also really adore y but *starts to ramble*" i do that and knoxxie does that. he's way too enthusiastic with this. (there are just too many filipino horror movies don't touch me im-) but i guess one of his top ones are yaya, the one w krissy aquino. knox loves krissy's acting tbh. and in feng shui? danggg.

charlie

well, this god of love? undin episode. no i will not elaborate.

cameron

like i said he didn't really liked horror movies but since SRR is very GOOD, he likes some of them. can i just *takes a deep breath* objectively, he'd say the best one is rain, rain go away. but a favorite for no fucking reason at all except beloved kathryn bernardo???? his favorite would be parola. ex best friend witches tried to kill each other on the lighthouse as a symbolism for the tragedies and misunderstanding that happened between them? yeah. he'd ate that shit up.

also bonus:

chris loves the parola episode too because of kathryn bernardo and witches. NO I WILL NOT STOP. filo chris’ gay awakening is kathryn. i will not elaborate.

ginny loves the one with marian rivera just like todd, nieves is the name of the episode. because filo ginny’s gay awakening is marian and she loves rom-com especially the ones with dongyan (marian rivera and dingdong dantes relationship name)

sir john keating??? all of them. just not pick one. i will not. shh.

[emoyuuta]

Sashisu vs Itafushikugi: an Astro Analysis

So this is going to be an analysis about these trios and the similarities and the differences they have (I’m also basing this on my precedent analyses about all six of them, feel free to check those to know more).

First of all, when analyzing different groups of people we have to keep in mind their social and generational planets.

Sashisu: Cancer Jupiter, Capricorn Saturn/Uranus/Neptune, Scorpio Pluto.

Itafushikugi: Leo Jupiter, Gemini Saturn, Aquarius (Megumi&Nobara) and Pisces (Yuuji) Uranus, Aquarius Neptune, Sagittarius Pluto.

The thing that could easily explain the overall mood of all of this is probably this meme:

Scorpio vs Sagittarius Pluto

This picture is especially representative of the difference between Scorpio and Sagittarius Pluto. Pluto defines the overall “existential mood”, the survival spirit of entire generations. It’s not a surprise that Scorpio Pluto kids (1984-1996 circa) were emo/scene teenagers, and that Sagittarius Pluto teenagers (1996-2008 circa)  now are “the meme kids”. Pluto is the planet of death and rebirth and “life cycles”, and it is in domicile in Scorpio. You can really understand how Scorpio Pluto kids were the conclusion of an era and the start of another, their job was (and still IS) to use the power they have, even if they think it’s scarce and not enough, to end whatever system existed before. And from the ruins of that emerges the Sagittarius Pluto generation.

Sagittarius is the “explorer” so it’s its job to travel through the wilderness and find another way of living, a new model to follow, so it’s normal that nowadays teens may feel a deep sense of “lostness” that they try to cover with “at least I’ll have fun”.

Saturn vs Uranus

Another reason why Sashisu may feel more “mature” compared to Itafushikugi is that they have that Capricorn Stellium really “grounds” them a lot. The fact that their sense of discipline and morality (Saturn), their views of innovation (Uranus) and their inspirations and their dreams (Neptune) have all the same common denominator. To quote another person from the same generation aka Nanami, it really looks like what they think they need is a 9-5 job that gets them enough money to retire early and then go finally live their life. That Capricorn energy, especially since it’s trailed by that Saturn in domicile, invites them to grit their teeth, to calculate your actions and stick to your plans, to “sacrifice” a bit because the results of those efforts are “delayed”, it’s like putting aside any spare coin you have and only a lot of time later you’ll see how much cash you made. Heck, I’d say that meeting them when they’re adults and then discovering that they too were young and vulnerable seems like a very Capricornian thing.

Itafushikugi’s social and generational planets lack earth energy, and that’s why their generation may look more “active” and dynamic.That air energy makes them more free-minded while the fire energy makes them more “fiery”. Their Saturn is in Gemini, which is a very weird placement because it’s debilitated or anything but you can already feel that struggle between a curious, “mercurial”, childish (or better, teenager-ish) sign and the hard job Saturn requires. I’d argue that this generation is lead by that Uranus (in domicile) in Aquarius, because if Sashisu were the people who discovered the system (Saturn) isn’t working anymore, then it’s up to younger kids to lead the revolution (Uranus).

It’s also very interesting how Yuuji is actually NOT part of the Aquarius Uranus generation. He’s the youngest character in the series and his Uranus is already in Pisces. I think it’s a distinguishing trait that makes him seem a bit different from his peers, like standing out as the “weirdo” in the group because his sense of originality is different from them.

Cancer Jupiter/Capricorn Saturn vs Gemini Saturn/Sagittarius Pluto

It’s very interesting how both generations present an opposition among social/generational planets.

Sashisu’s one is marked by the Cancer Jupiter theoretically opposing three Capricorn planets, but I think that overall the Jupiter/Saturn is the most important one because those planets represent concepts that seem to be antithetical. Cancer (exalted) Jupiter incites you to share your resources with others, no matter if it’s influence, information or material stuff or just “gut feeling”, to create a warm and welcoming environment. Capricorn Saturn (in domicile) tells you to stick to the rules, to deal with the responsibilities dumped on you by higher structures, no matter how hard they are. The one who has the tightest opposition here is Shoko, while Geto doesn’t really have this aspect because the two planets are too far away, but he has so much Saturnian energy that I think this works for him too.

Itafushikugi’s generation is highlighted by the Gemini Saturn/Sagittarius Pluto opposition. If Saturn is related to rules and authoritative figures, and Pluto represents regenerations and crave for power, we could say that there’s an innate feeling of antipathy for any social norm or structure, which could literally try to prevent their rise to power. It’s interesting how the person who has the tightest opposition is Yuuji, followed by Megumi, while Nobara basically escapes it (Yuuji risking execution, Megumi defied the laws by saving Yuuji, and Nobara...well she’s the least tied to that occurrence).

Similarities and differences among their personal planets

It’s very curious that Sashisu all have their Suns square their Moons, which highlights a struggle between what they feel and their sense of identity. I have already said this, but a very very peculiar thing is that Geto and Shoko’s Suns are perfectly squaring their Suns (Aquarius and Scorpio), and so do their Moons (Taurus and Aquarius). So Shoko’s Moon is conjunct to Geto’s Sun, while Geto’s Moon is opposing Shoko’s Sun. I think that this scene is the perfect representation of this kind of synastry, it’s like Shoko gets him but Geto doesn’t think so because his idea of her seems to be opposite to what he feels.

Gojo’s Moon doesn’t really square his Sun, and the fact that both are in Jupiterian signs (Sagittarius and Pisces) may ease just a teeny tiny bit this aspect.

Another thing that is very very interesting about Sashisu is that all three of them have Venus in Capricorn.

Itafushikugi, instead, all have Suns inconjunct their Moons, so that kind of struggle is not there. There’s kind of a parallel: Nobara’s Sun sign is the same as Megumi’s Moon (both in Leo), while Megumi’s Sun and Nobara’s Moon are in opposite signs (Capricorn and Cancer). The planets are all far away from each other so it’s not a real conjunction/opposition, BUT Megumi and Nobara’s Moon (being at early and late degrees) are actually kind of conjuct (?) each other.

Also not a parallel but let’s not forget that both generations have a person with a “what the fuck” chart (in very different ways: Geto with his six (6) planets in Capricorn (Mercury, Venus, Mars, Saturn, Uranus and Neptune) vs Nobara and her five planets in domicile (Sun, Moon, Mercury, Venus and Uranus).

Somebody said that Yuuji and Geto seem a bit similar, the closest explanation I can think about it is that they both are Venusian Moons (Libra and Taurus) with an (exalted) Capricorn Mars (why such gentle souls have a bazooka in their hands???). Actually, all Sashisu have dignified Mars: Gojo and Shoko’s are in domicile in Scorpio, and Geto has an exalted Mars in Capricorn; Megumi has also Mars in Scorpio, Yuuji in Capricorn, only Nobara has it in Leo, which means it’s not dignified BUT it’s very very tightly conjunct her Sun and trining her Pluto so it’d be an insult to not take that into consideration.

Another difference between the two generations is that in Sashisu each person lacks an element (Gojo lacks Air placements while Shoko and Geto lack Fire placements), while Itafushikugi all have at least one planet in each sign.

As a conclusion, here are some elements that jump to the eye when analyzing each character’s chart:

- Gojo: enough Jupiterian energy to contrast those four Capricorn planets

- Geto: Six planets in Capricorn + Sun in Aquarius, aka SEVEN Saturnian planets

- Shoko: both Mars and Pluto in Scorpio, but only Pluto possibly in her 1st house while Mars slips in her 12th house

- Yuuji: Pisces/Aquarius energy

- Nobara: Leo stellium (Sun, Mars, Jupiter), Sun very closely conjunct Mars and Sun perfectly trine Pluto.

- Megumi: Pluto in the 4th house and Jupiter in the 12th house perfectly conjuct.

[artificialqueens]

Stagnant (Taywhora) - pureCAMP

A/N - I keep wanting to write some fun diamond chaney stuff but rn I’m going through some shit so I have created angsty taywhora. You’re so welcome <3

Love isn’t supposed to taste sour. Love isn’t supposed to go off, like opened milk left in the fridge too long. When love breaks down, it should be explosive and intense, because logically, scientifically, all that energy has to go somewhere. Atoms, molecules, chemicals, matter can be created but not destroyed and all of that. It’s physics. All of that love, that energy, has to be channelled somewhere, so it should be channelled into a bright flame, severing any bonds as the energy dispels.

It shouldn’t just… be like this. Like a tiny hole in a balloon, slowly and silently deflating rather than the sudden, heart-stopping pop. Like that moment where you take the bottle of milk from the fridge, take a whiff, and sort of wrinkle your nose. Because it’s vaguely unpleasant, enough to know it’s a little off.

Love should be more than that. If it’s not, was it ever really there?

A’Whora wonders if she should start writing a diary, confiding in a journal, whatever. It’s not something she’s ever considered before, not with Tayce. She tells Tayce everything, every last pet peeve and irritation or deeply analysed personal flaw.  There are no secrets between them, it’s honest and open and A’Whora has never felt more understood than she does with Tayce. Tayce feels like someone who she finally fits with, the jigsaw piece that slots in perfectly. Tayce is perfect.

Tayce hasn’t changed, but they have. Something is different now. Maybe another piece fell out of place, and the picture is incomplete now. If that’s the case, then why does their relationship feel like it’s taking the brunt of the loss?

They argue. No one would bat an eyelid at that; flirty banter is entirely their thing, insults delivered with a single raised eyebrow, gasped responses with faux high intonations, specific looks. But these arguments, this bickering… The flirtation, if it was ever there, certainly isn’t now. Sometimes Tayce does things, and A’Whora feels like little twigs are being snapped in her chest. She feels like she’s sitting in the fields trying to listen to a teacher while someone next to her won’t stop tearing up the grass and tossing it around. She feels like someone is endlessly clearing their throat and she can’t tune out.

But it’s Tayce. How can it feel like that when it’s her? A’Whora loves Tayce. She knows it.

She thinks it.

The beginning of the end starts with Tia. Tayce knows all about A’Whora’s opinions on Tia, starting with how insufferably annoying she’d found her, then morphing into the guilt of she’s a perfectly nice and funny person and I’m so shit to her and I feel so bad that I judged her like that and acted like a bitch when there was nothing wrong with her and then, finally, to the friendly toleration. They get along fine just now, and while they never really choose to hang out one on one, it doesn’t feel like a loss or a dig for either of them. They’re friends, and it’s good.

The girls are all out for brunch. Or, they started at brunch, and then blinked and it was 7pm, and the cocktails they’d shared at lunch started to sound a lot like hey we’re already out, we may as well go out out and now they were out out, nestled into a pub with an empty pitcher and too many glasses on the table in front of them. A’Whora can barely rest her elbows on the sticky wood without knocking a glass or two over, but they’re packed in like sardines and putting her arms down means brushing up against Tayce.

They’re dating, but for some reason touching her casually like that feels wrong. Not dangerously wrong, glaringly wrong, or evoking some kind of deep sulphuric hatred that burns holes through her stomach. Just… off, like touching the unprotected relics in an old church. You can, but it feels a little like you shouldn’t, even though nothing will happen if you do.

She keeps her elbows on the table. The stickiness bothers her, but not as much as the looks that Tayce sends her way when their arms accidentally touch. What does that look mean? Why is it so irritating?

Tia pulls focus, thankfully, grinning like she’s never grinned before in her life and digging through her purse. Veronica has her arm looped around her waist, sitting close enough that Lawrence and Ellie have room to sit beside them. It’s a good thing Bimini and Asttina are small, because A’Whora and Tayce are nowhere near as snuggled up as those two.

When she finally stops digging, Tia presents a hand like she’s a princess expecting a kiss, and everybody’s eyes are drawn to the ring adorning her finger. If she’s honest, it only caught A’Whora’s eye because Tia’s choice in jewellery is usually much flashier and cheaper than that, but she reasons that obviously Veronica chose it, and then the reality of what’s happening kicks in. Tia and Veronica are engaged. They’re getting married. Everyone, A’Whora and Tayce included, excitedly congratulates them. She’s genuinely happy for them, but she’s not genuinely happy. It doesn’t make much sense.

Maybe it’s the cocktail buzz, but A’Whora feels funny. She registers two sensations at once, managing them by way of urgency. First, she mumbles something about needing the bathroom and click-clacks her heels up the stairs into the women’s, finding it mercifully empty, or close enough. She picks the first available stall and awkwardly crouches over the bowl, trying to gag, waiting for it so she can finally feel better.

She pukes twice; some of it gets on the wall, but only a small amount. She holds her breath as she fumbles in her bag for tissues, cleans it up as best as she can, and steadies herself. Too much fucking sugar and fruit in those cocktails, she thinks. They taste amazing and feel terrible. Her stomach still feels horribly fragile, like it’s separating in the middle, but when a test heave brings up nothing, she decides a regular drink, non-alcoholic, will probably settle her.

Before leaving the bathroom (and after washing her hands), she opens up her phone and follows her second instinct, tapping on the screen until everything’s confirmed and then tucking it back in her bag and heading down the stairs. She won’t tell anyone she’s been sick, because that’s both embarrassing and would ruin the fun.

When she rejoins the table, Lawrence is halfway through a roaringly funny anecdote that involves burnt toast, Ellie being a disgusting whore, and possibly a ruined anniversary. Everyone is howling with laughter; Tia’s hanging off of Veronica, Ellie’s clutching her stomach, Bimini and Asttina have both thrown their heads backwards off their chairs in laughter, and Tayce is laughing so hard she’s completely silent, vibrating. A’Whora sits down and forces a chuckle just so she fits in, desperate to maintain at least one of her jigsaw puzzle pieces while she can. Tayce clasps a hand over her knee as she laughs, and the touch is not uncomfortable, but unwelcome. She gently moves her leg away from Tayce’s hand - Tayce stops laughing, looks at A’Whora, then looks away and resumes her laughter like it’s nothing. It was something, but for now it needs to be nothing.

It just solidifies the idea in A’Whora’s mind that she’s done the right thing.

-

The following morning, she suddenly remembers it. They’d both awoken a bit headachey, but otherwise fine, fresh as daisies even. Ellie keeps texting the groupchat about her wicked hangover, and as she says something about am literally desperate enough to try raw eggs at this point A’Whora mutes the chat, not wanting to get distracted.

Tayce is in the living room, not a stitch of makeup on, wearing a big t-shirt with Eeyore on it and a pair of grey shorts hidden somewhere underneath it. She’s absolutely beautiful, breath-taking, stunning. No one in the world is built like she is.

A’Whora wonders if it’ll ever be enough.

Steeling herself, she makes her way into the living room, briefly stopping in front of the hallway mirror. She looks a mess, hair in a gravity-defying bun, dark circles under her eyes, the remnants of last night’s lipstick still smudged on the inside of her lips. Does Tayce think she’s just as beautiful when she sees her like this? Is there still beauty in her ugliness?

“Morning, you,” She greets, injecting a cheerful note into her voice. Tayce nearly jumps out of her skin, but when she turns around she meets A’Whora’s eye, mercifully, with a smile that looks genuine.

“Hiya love,” Tayce replies, beckoning her to come and sit on the sofa next to her. “How you feeling after last night? Have you seen all of Ellie’s bitching?”

A’Whora sets herself down, leans into Tayce’s side, embracing the early morning closeness before it can evade them. Her head rests on her girlfriend’s shoulder, and neither of them move to rest it elsewhere, so it’s a good start.

“I don’t feel too bad, head’s a bit fucked though,” She admits.

Tayce laughs, causing her shoulders to bounce and wobbling A’Whora’s head. “Here, I think your head was fucked before a couple of cocktails, babe.”

She’s not wrong. A’Whora grants her a laugh which is only a little bit fake, and then sucks in a breath to start speaking. Unfortunately, Tayce beats her to it,

“And all this about our Ronnie proposing to Tia? You know, I was thinking about it all night but I didn’t wanna say anything and make it all about us, but what are they gonna do about the hen do? Like, a joint one, or two separate ones on different nights where all but one of us is out?”

It’s a very fair point, but it’s so far from important in A’Whora’s mind that she brushes it away. Dwelling on the success and excitement of another friend’s relationship is hardly going to ease the tempest waging war in whatever part of her body processes weird emotions that feel the need to migrate to her chest and stomach. She’s happy for them. Her feelings end there. It doesn’t need discussion.

She presses a kiss to Tayce’s shoulder, feigning nonchalance over the topic. “I don’t wanna talk about them, they have it all figured out and that’s boring. I, however, did something last night.”

Tayce raises an eyebrow and waits. A’Whora pulls up her phone, shows the screenshots of the booking confirmation.

“We’re going on holiday!”

A second passes. Then another. Then another. Silence.

Then, Tayce hunches her shoulders and A’Whora takes the cue to remove her head, to stop resting against her, to sit up and be serious. She sighs heavily, glancing at A’Whora’s phone again and then up at the ceiling, her enthusiasm about her friends and a night out stripped away immediately.

“A’Whora…” She hates when Tayce uses her name properly, it feels wrong now after getting used to so many nicknames and pet-names. “What- We’ve got work, we can’t just jet off on holiday whenever we want.”

Is this the first hole in the balloon, the start of the slow deflation, or is it one of many slowly letting out air, gaining speed with every interaction that goes the wrong way? Either way, there’s a sinking feeling in A’Whora that just won’t let up. She doesn’t even want to try - she considers cancelling the booking, giving up the tickets, apologising for such a stupid oversight. But no, she wants to try. Making an effort is important, and she doesn’t want to just sit back and let things sputter out like a dying fire. They will burn bright or not at all.

“I know I - I rushed it, a bit, and I’m sorry I didn’t think that far ahead. But I think this’ll be good! Just you and me, away from all the stress and chaos, some proper alone time.”

She feels like they’re never really alone. They’re not, when she thinks about it - friends always texting, TV always on, always aware of the presence and existence of other people when the whole world used to be just Tayce and A’Whora, A’Whora and Tayce, and everyone else was secondary. Her plan had been pretty bare bones, but a long drive through Middle America until they reach sunny California feels like it can fix things. They can reconnect properly on the long drive, fall in love with being in love again, and then bask in the sunshine and luxury of wherever in Cali takes their fancy when they make it there. Escaping to a place where just for a while, they’ll be the only ones… That sounds good. That sounds like what they need. The panacea of relationships, the reminder of what they were.

Tayce agrees to go.

-

“You know, I literally hate people and I can barely be alone with someone for ten minutes without getting pissed off but I honestly feel like I could sit here talking with you forever,” A’Whora admitted, blushing and laughing at Tayce’s expression. “No, really! We could go anywhere, where shall we go? Barry Island?”

Tayce snorted. “Oh fuck off with that, Lawrence’ll never let go of this bloody Gavin and Stacey thing she’s got going on if we go there. Anywhere but that.”

They collapsed into laughter, mindful of gear sticks and cupholders digging into their sides as they went limp. A’Whora feigned offense, wrinkling her nose and sticking out her bottom lip in a childish pout.

“I’m just annoyed that her joke means I’m the bloke of the relationship. Fucking Gavin, I mean he’s such a wet wipe.”

“I wonder if that would make Lawrence Nessa though?” Tayce pondered, gasping as genius struck her. “Oh my god, Rory, would that make Ellie Smithy?”

A’Whora was sure her stomach was going to fall out of her body with the force of her laughter, so sore she couldn’t do anything besides screeching and trying desperately to stop, to no avail. The car was parked up in a lay-by overlooking the sea, still with no destination in mind as of yet, but they were happy to observe the view as they munched their sandwiches, scrambled for a plan and tried to assign each of their friends a Gavin and Stacey character. (Bims was obviously Pam, if she was slightly more unhinged.)

Tayce wiped her eyes. “This is beastly. Alright, alright, where are we actually going then? Do we have any plan at all?”

A’Whora shrugged. “Drive til we find somewhere that looks nice?”

“Sounds good.” She leant over, the two of the meeting in the middle for a sweet, lingering kiss.

“Happy six months, gorgeous.”

-

It’s not the same. Of course it’s not the same. Everything is different now, so why would this be the same?

America is big. Big enough that you can drive and drive and the landscape will stay the same, dusty and yellow with nothing else to see beyond the occasional sparse red rock. There is nothing for miles in any direction, and they are the only car on the road, just driving through endless space.

At first, she’d thought that the big open space would make it easier to run from their problems, the simplicity providing some clarity into why everything seemed to have shifted and allowing them space to fix it all. Instead, the emptiness was just exacerbating her own emptiness, a barren landscape horribly reminiscent of their lives at home.

They had been so colourful, once. When had the barren desolation crept in? Where had it all gone?

America is so big, and they are so small.

Some of these Middle America states are so similar that the line between them seems to just be an arbitrary thing, as the sign indicates they’re somewhere new while the landscape suggests they’re anything but. Tayce is driving, occasionally tapping her fingers on the wheel in tune to the music, which A’Whora pretends doesn’t annoy her. It used to be endearing, but hours of tap tap tap feels like some tame iteration of water torture. Then she feels ridiculous for such a dramatic comparison, and tries to count her blessings.

She’s in a beautiful country with a beautiful girl. She should be happy.

They both should.

“So we’re due in California in like two days of driving, yeah?” Tayce checks, still drumming away on the steering wheel. “Where are we staying tonight, then?”

A’Whora shrugs. “I just thought we’d find somewhere along the way, a motel or something.”

Apparently that’s the wrong thing to say. Tayce huffs.

“What, so we’re just driving aimlessly? You didn’t book anything?”

Her memory jolts back to their six month anniversary, almost forever ago now in the timeline of their relationship. She doesn’t know if Tayce remembers any details of that day, or just the fond memories that she clings onto as best as she can. Before she even says it, she’s knows it’s stupid, knows it won’t work, and is annoyed at herself before Tayce even can be. In fact, she knows it’ll start an argument. But what else is there to say?

At least their arguments have a bit of passion, a tiny spark. Nothing like the explosions, but maybe it’s a start. It’s better than letting their love sit stagnant and off until it slowly disintegrates.

“Drive til we find somewhere that looks nice?”

She thinks about sharing a kiss, feeling a sort of young happiness that melts away everything else in the world. She thinks about how lucky they felt.

“For fuck’s sake, A’Whora. I thought you would’ve at least planned something for your little impromptu holiday,” Tayce snaps, turning off the music. Thank God - no more tapping.

“My impromptu holiday? This is about us, Tayce, which apparently you’re too blind to see. I did this so we could spend some time together alone and actually start getting on.”

“Start getting on? What the fuck are you talking about?”

“Oh my god, okay, it’s all in my head then and I’m the bad guy. I just mean that we’ve been bickering a lot and I thought that getting away from home would help us recalibrate and get back to normal, Christ.”

“This isn’t a coming of age film, you can’t just jet off to fix things. We’re fine, but this is a bit of a piss take because there’s nothing literally anywhere and we have no idea when the next place to stop will even be. Can you at least look on your phone for somewhere instead of making this into a fight?”

“I’m not making it into- fine, yeah, I’ll look. There’s no signal, though, we might need to get further towards a town before we can look something up.”

“Fuck me. This is so relaxing, I’m so glad I booked a week off to do this.”

“I was trying to do something nice, you don’t need to be like that.”

“I know, I’m sorry. Let’s just - I’ll put the music back on, we’ll keep going.”

They drive in silence.

-

Four hours later, there’s a motel. It’s a single isolated building in the middle of the emptiness, with neon signs that buzz and hum with electricity and flicker on and off. There’s only three other cars in the car park besides theirs, all aggressively American looking, but it’s dark and they’re both too tired to care. It looks like the kind of place that a murder is definitely going to take place, probably tonight, but Tayce stacks up the chairs in front of the door in case the lock fails and flops down onto the bed, exhausted.

“This is fucking delightful.” She comments dryly. “I guess it’s an authentic American road trip experience, though, so I’ll give you credits for that.”

Her tone is unnecessary - A’Whora prickles. “Oh wow, thank you so much for all the credit you’re giving me. I feel so inspired to do nice things for our relationship again now.”

It happens again. Arguments, none of them screaming matches, no blinding fury and passion, no explosive fights and hateful sex and the feeling of losing it all, so throwing everything in at once to stoke the flames. It’s just another small thing, again and again and again.

They’re fighting and there’s just no reason for it whatsoever. No one has done anything wrong. No one has said anything wrong. They love each other, desperately, and they’re fighting.

Eventually A’Whora realises what they’re doing, and it hurts somewhere deep and cavernous in her chest. Their love won’t end in explosions and flames and hysterics and tears, but they’re still arguing and bickering for a reason, just not the one she thought.

If love is supposed to be so big, all grand gestures and bleeding heart fights, then what are they? Were they ever in love?

It doesn’t matter. The truth is, they’re just breaking something because they don’t know how to fix it.

There’s no fixing this.

-

They don’t make it to California.

[uncertaininnit]

a bitch is going to analyse the appearances of wilbur and tommy in the vlog w/ pictures because it is 2:12 am, i get simpy at night, and i just watched the vlog and have shit to say

aight literally im writing an essay on them and pinning it for the time being because there is no better way to introduce myself than this because this is honestly what i am anyway its below the cut 

Alright. Allow us to just jump in, okay?

The thoughts are a bit incoherent at times it took me a while to piece together my shit.

To make it easier, we are going to start with Tommy. I am going to just be... talking about how he looked in the video. Don’t take it a weird way.

So basically when I am deciding whether or not Tommyinnit looks good in a specific clip/picture I just kinda use 3 things. How much I like his shirt, How fluffy his hair looks, and how much his eyes stand out. What I mean is I rate him on, like, aesthetic attractiveness. So.

In the vlog, and just generally whenever he goes outdoors on camera, Tommy wears his signature colors on his signature type of shirt. White with red sleeves, shoulders, and collar. It’s the Tommyinnit shirt. (Also known as the protagonist shirt, because just so many main characters wear that shirt.) That kind of shirt is my second favorite, below his pink shirt. So it scores very highly for me. (Listen, his pink shirt is something hard to describe. It makes me happy.)

Also, forgot to mention the MASKS. For in public? They are what inspired this essay. Anyway.

Tommy’s eyes. Man. If you know me all I do is talk about Tommys eyes/his pink shirt, and this paragraph is the eye paragraph. So anyways. Tommyinnit has pretty blue eyes. How do I explain what makes eyes pretty? I can’t. They are really blue. And they are his eyes. And they are pretty eyes. Anyway, so, during certain parts of the video, his eyes really stand out.

Also, his hair is pretty fluffy. Would rate it high.

Time to thread together my thoughts.

So, Tommy’s mask that he normally wears in public is like a generic cheap-ass light blue mask, but like. That mask. It’s light blue, so it really compliments his eyes, but also, because it’s blue, it contrasts his shirt, which is just really cool? IDK how to explain it, have a couple pictures. 

Neither of these pictures are actually from the vlog but like... that’s just his fit when he goes outside. It’s easier to show through like a good picture than just a screenshot. Anyway, do you see what I’m saying? Somehow the mask just is doing it for him. Nice job, Tommy.

Also, in his in-between parts where he was explaining stuff, his eyes REALLY stood out?

Look at his eyes! They look really unremarkable apon deeper thought but this isn’t about that. I think it’s the natural lighting? Like, I think he’s just using the light from his windows, and he just looks good in natural lighting? All evidence points to yes. 

(I kept on watching the video to get screenshots for later and ended up just wisper-screaming ‘they are literally STUNNING! what the FUCK!’ about his eyes so I think you understand by now how they make me feel. These pictures don’t do them justice, they are like S P A R K L I N G in the video.)

Anyway, onto the bigger and more simpful part. Wilbur fucking Soot. I could go on and ON about how he’s the prettiest fucker on this side of the cosmos, and I will. Not really, but to explain how I feel, I gotta go in depth, so bear with me. If you survived the pictures of Tommy and me talking about eyes you can do this.

so actually im just going to resist the urge to write everything about wilbur that i think is gorgeous because we would be here forever and let’s just skip to the point. wilbur in the video was wearing his glasses, this really really light like... beige shirt that is like a button up or whatever and very his style and looks great and. a mask. a plain white mask.

i cant even explain it to you. it just highlights his features REALLY FUCKING WELL. its like really tight on his face and so like his jaw,,,,,,,,,, and shit and it matches really well w/ his shirt. just- look at the pictures.

look at the- at- at IT

seriously its just its so like tight on his face and like- how do i even explain how pretty he is? he’s just already pretty, and that mask does nothing to hide it one bit. it’s RIDICULOUS. 

also forgot to mention his hair, but his hair literally always looks fucking incredible. damn. 

and then LATER, when Tommy breaks onto Wilbur’s stream, and Wilbur comes on to another stream to apologise, and he just looks so GOOD. like the gods were in his favor that day or whatever, because he just looks SO good. just- look.

how is he so fucking pretty? like doesnt it hurt to be without flaw all the time? 

anyway i guess thats it.

started at 2:12am and ended at 5:10 but tbh i got distracted by panama and that took a lot of my time. anyway.

[normiewrites]

can you write something where the s/o is on the girls team? i love your writing btw! ^for kags

i have a feeling that this wasn’t an angst request lmaoo

thanks to @kingtamakimurder and @kenmaksuwu for helping me out!

warning(s): angst, character death, a lil graphic stuff

your elusive dream-boy - tobio kageyama x (fem)reader

you felt him everywhere. when you would jump up to hit the ball for your serve, you could feel his hands on your shoulders and arm, directing you how to move your body to hit it at your strongest power. when you would pull the knee pads up your legs, you could feel his warm and calloused hands trailing your skin afterwards, but not lingering long enough to get addicted. when your team mates hugged you after a victory, you could feel his warm and broad chest up against yours, his arms enveloping your exhausted body and sending tingles up your skin, making you feel at home.

not only did you feel him everywhere, you saw him too. he lingered around you like a shadow; surrounding you in the dark and just out of reach in the light. when you would set the ball, he would be there, the opponent on the other side, right at the net. when you would practice your spiking, he would be there, blocking them. when you would go to refill your bottle, he would be there, his back turned to you as he refills his bottle, before walking off.

he was there but wasn’t at the same time. he was like those annoying mosquitoes that no matter how fast or how good your reflexes are, you can never seem to smack them. he was your elusive dream-boy. you even thought it was a ghost at one time, but that didn’t matter, because he wasn’t supposed to be there. he never had this much free time to be following you around, he should’ve been in practice instead, or rather, dead.

but no matter how dead he really was, there was something about this mirage that you made you want it to stay. maybe it was because of how greedy you were, clinging onto any memories that he had, because you were never ready to say goodbye.

you never would be.

or maybe it was the universe punishing you. for not being there on time. for not saying ‘I love you’ in time. for not letting go of him already.

the way he went out was pretty simple, a driver on his phone hits an unsuspecting boy as he tried to cross the street. they never knew why he was crossing the street, but you knew he was going to the flower stall where he got you your favourite flowers whenever he went out. it wasn’t anything special. it made the newspaper headlines for a week or two, ‘team mates hold ceremony in memory of pro volleyball athlete.’ he would reach people’s mouths for a while too, ‘he had so much potential’, ‘he was so young, how shameful’ or ‘I hope they put the driver behind bars for life.’ they never seemed to understand that it doesn’t matter what happened to the driver, there would still be blood seeping out of his head and onto the hood of the light blue car hood.

he would still be as lifeless as the chemistry books resting in the shelves of a delinquent student.

he would still be dead.

he would still be only a memory, forgotten and eluded over time.

but no matter what, he never left you. he was always there, even after death.

overtime, you got used to it. it was almost second nature to check if he was there or not. you never needed to check because he always was, but you feared that if you looked away for a second, he’d be taken away from you again, like your acknowledgement of him was the only thing keeping him here. you were the only thing keeping him here.

but maybe he didn’t need to be kept here any longer, make it was time for him to go. but you never knew what the right time was. the concept was always so weird to you, some would say that time is a social construct, others would say that it governs your body or even that it restricts empowerment. you knew the second one was partially true, but the concept was so abstract that it never had a definite answer. it made it harder for you to decide when you needed to let him go. especially because you knew, that if you never made the decision to date him, he would be earning trophies and getting interviewed.

“why are you still here?” you had asked him one winter morning, as you both sat on your porch stairs.

your breath went out as smoke from your mouth like a fire breathing dragon, joining the smoke that your warm cup of tea made as you both sat on the steps. the distant chirping of the migrating birds were loud yet empty, almost as if it was inviting you to mark the snow with your spirit and to sing along.

he didn’t answer, but for the first time you felt like he was actually looking at you for once, his dark blue eyes piercing into your side profile. you could feel them rake over your features, as if he were analysing a new object and regaining his surroundings or as if he were looking for the last time and wanted to memorise it.

he kept staring at you, till the point you felt slightly conscious about your face, almost wanting to mould everything into something else like clay. you had always wanted to melt away in the most uncomfortable situations, escaping to some gutter or drain, but his stare made you realise that you still had a face, even if you couldn’t feel it. that’s how the rest of the morning went. his stare burning into the back of your head. he might as well have tattooed his eyes onto you.

but just like time, the answer was never definitive and never given, and you didn’t know what to do. maybe you needed to actually tell yourself that the boy who hit you in the head with his jump serve and insulted you afterwards was really dead. that maybe he wasn’t going to be there to wrap up your knee injuries or scold you for keeping your nails too long. that maybe his time on earth was enough and he really needed to go.

so, little by little, he started appearing less, and you couldn’t feel him as strongly as before. you did start feeling a certain pang of sadness in your throat whenever he wouldn’t be there in your sight, but it wasn’t sad enough to pull out the tears from your eyes.

and little by little, you didn’t have enough time to focus on him. exams and practice was all that was on your mind, and sometimes he would squeeze in whenever there was space, like a mouse when escaping from a cat and diving in between the walls.

but he was pushed to the back of your mind, and you barely noticed or cared to look for him anymore. you didn’t want to admit it, but at times you would will him to appear when you felt yourself drifting off into your own world of school.

that’s how it was for the remainder of your years at karasuno high school. you were droned into a monotonous routine of studying, eating, practicing and sleeping, barely even stepping out to hang with your team-mates or friends. you seemed to like it better that way, all alone to do something productive or just be bored by yourself. in those times you were by yourself, you could feel a tightening tension in your throat, like you were waiting for something you didn’t know of. you would grip onto your shirt whenever that would happen, wanting to tear the murky feeling out.

it was surprising yet expected when that ‘thing’ you were waiting for was on your graduation day, when you found yourself face to face with him on the court.

everything was slightly dark but the lights from the main school building gave a soft glow to the gym, as if it were apart of your dream, a dream you knew you didn’t want to wake up from because he was there, right on the other side of the net.

he looked as fresh as the day you first met him. he was practicing after hours and accidentally served a ball out of the gym, hitting you in the leg as you passed by to go home from your own practice. he came running out, his face flushed unevenly and sweat dripping down it. the look he gave you told you he didn’t have the patience for you, but the moment you asked if you could help, it changed to annoyance. maybe it wasn’t the best first impression, but it wasn’t the last.

even with the grids of the net blocking the whole view of him, you could still tell he was as beautiful as the day he confessed to you. his raven silky and arrogant, his face pale yet full of life, his lips loud yet secretive and his eyes, dark and inviting.

the net felt so rough yet so familiar as you put your forehead against it, the pleasant warm and soft feeling of his forehead greeting yours. it was almost like you both were meeting at a border, you both were right there yet so far away. and like at a border, he watched you cry. he watched as the drops raced down your skin, very much the same way his fingers would, but he knew you weren’t sad, you were just so happy to see him one last time.

taking a few breaths in and holding in your sniffles, you talked, not caring that your voice cracked, “happy graduation, tobio. I would tease you for not being able to graduate because of how dumb you are at studies, but you still would have, because you could easily work hard if you wanted you, and I’m sure you would have bothered me to tutor you. you would have graduated with all your medals dangling on your neck, and you would get so annoyed by how loud they would clatter that you would hide them in your gown. in fact, they did mention you at the end. ‘tobio kageyama, the king of the court.’ I knew you would have grown to love the name, hinata told me so.”

he wondered how you could chuckle in such a sad situation. it’s actually one of the things he admired about you, knowing not to give up. it’s what attracted him most to you.

“fuck, I miss you so much. I know I’ll never be able to let go of you because you make a room in my heart and left all of your stupid books and equipment in there and I can’t move it. it will always hurt to think about you, because you aren’t fucking here, graduating with me or exploring the world like we wanted to, mapping off countries which we’ve been too for matches. we were supposed to be the setters couple, the best in the world. but it’s okay, I understood that you had to move on, and maybe you’re doing better things right now. but so am I, I’m going to join the national team and win every single match for you.”

the tears were so hot against your skin, you could almost believe that you were in a sauna. your nose was blocked and sniffling and your throat hurt so much with how many words you wanted to say but couldn’t. looking into his eyes, you could see a flicker of sadness, but what really caught you was that he was smiling. he did smile around you a lot, but this smile said it was the last one.

“I love you tobio kageyama, I love you for everything that you were and everything that you did. you will always be apart of me and each time I set the ball, you’re always going to be there, guiding me. I just want your dumbass to hit me in the head again with your serve, but we can only dream. happy graduation, tobio kageyama, everyone’s so proud of you.”

taking in his dark blue eyes for the last time, you closed yours, trying to feel his soul through his skin. even with the pain burning through your body, you could feel him and it calmed you so much, it made you understand that while there may never be the right time to let go, there didn’t have to be a right time, because he was always going to be there.

little by little, the feeling of warmth that he exuded was gone, leaving you alone in the court; the place where you both began and ended.

he was your elusive dream-boy, and he was always going to be your elusive dream-boy.

[aeruthien]

Do have any Haymille headcanons? I have a lot of feels about them lately and was wondering...

Ok, so romantically, I suppose that Hayley and Cami could start to feel something for each other in between s3-s4, provided that Cami is still alive.

They work well together. Hayley has a great drive. She is like a dog with a bone, and will never let go. Cami has a great analytical mind and good insight in people's motivations and thought patterns. Other than that, they can really help each other. Cami could give Hayley some tools to analyse her feelings. About the wolves, about the Mikaelsons, about Hope, while Hayley can help Cami put her thoughts to rest and just start somewhere.

It would be perfect for the 'there is only one bed' trope, tbh. They have been searching for the cure, they arrive at a motel, and there is only one bed. They are exhausted, and don't care enough to continue driving, and just crash into the bed together.

And then they wake up in the middle of the night, limbs tangled, pressed very close. They are both lonely, and really got to know each other now that they spend much more time together, and they both realize that oh. OH. This could complicate things.

Maybe they kiss, maybe they kiss later, but anyway, they kind of get together. And at one point Hope calls Cami 'Mom' and Hayley just gets this warm feeling in her chest.

Anyway, I also took the liberty of using this post with Haymille!

Who was the one to propose: Hayley. It was really awkward, because Hayley is an all or nothing girl, who isn't faced by feelings, but she got nervous on the spot. Who stressed more over wedding planning: Cami. Hayley went through it once already. Who decorated the house: Cami. Hayley doesn't really care about house decorating, except for some of her own smaller items. Who does the cooking: Cami, mostly. Hayley is very good at burning stuff and helping. Who is more organized: Cami. No need to elaborate. Who initiates bedroom fun: Both. Cami when she is tipsy. Hayley during weird times of the day. Who's more dominant: Hayley is more openly dominant and jealous, but Cami has this smouldering look when guys (or girls) get too close. Who's the cuddler: Both, but mostly Hayley. Who's the big spoon/little spoon: They switch. What's their favorite non-sexual activity: Watching stupid series together and laughing about bad acting. Taking Hope to the zoo/park/etc.. Who comes home drunk at 3am: Both, but mostly Cami, because Hayley is a responsible Mom. Who kills the spiders: Hayley. Cami wants to let them live and put them outside, and Hayley doesn’t give a damn. That spider better be gone. Who falls asleep first: Cami. A head canon: When they got together they felt guilty, because Cami was also still in love with Klaus, and Hayley with Elijah. But then Cami admitted that Klaus had alluded to being in love with Rebekah and Elijah during one of their sessions, and they stopped caring. Do they have any "rituals"? Hayley likes to change during the full moon, and after she (and later Hope and Klaus) return from spending the night outside, she jumps in bed with Cami still in wolf form and they snuggle. Who is louder? Both try to be louder than the other. Who is more experimental? Both, but mostly Cami. She approaches it very analytically, and takes notes. Who takes more risks? Hayley. Do they fuck or make love? Both, depending on the mood and if Hope is anywhere near them. Lights on or off? Candle/dimmed lights Who is more likely to be caught masturbating? Neither? Who is more likely to suggest a threefoursome? Both of them, but Cami first. If they are also both in love with the boys and the boys with them and each other... who is stopping them? Who comes first? Depends. Who is better at oral and who prefers it? Cami is better, Hayley prefers it. Who is more submissive? Both are equally dominant. Who usually initiates things? Hayley. Who is more sensitive? Hayley, due to her hybrid nature. Who has the most patience? Cami.

[iam-kenough]

Will  you ever notice me? Arthur Morgan x Original Female Character

Summary: During they wandering in deep snowstorm, man from van der Linde gang found odd looking girl and Dutch decides to take her to camp to see if she can be any use, leading life of outlaw with them. Quickly, new girl develops feelings towards Arthur, but he sees her just as a kid...and she won't take that! It's an original character story that starts in the place where Arthur, Dutch and Micah were supposed to first meet with Sadie. Instead she's already with them.

Authors notes: It’s second chapter and you can find the rest of chapter on my blog if you want to read more of my fanfiction.

Word count: 2978 Chapter 2

It was next day's evening when they landed on new camp's place. Everyone started arranging their tents and some of them decided to go to the lake and bath after long trip.

- The water is so damn cold! But it was nice to take a bath after all those hours- Iris was talking to Mary-Beth and her teeth were chattering. She decided to wear woolen dress Mary gave to her, not being even slightly suspicious why Iris would wear a dress so badly. It was nice, wine red and warm one. She decided to tweeze her brows a little bit and she brushed her long, black hair putting them in loose bun. Even though she will undress and wear only chemise in her bed in less than 3 hours.

Iris looked around and sighed. All good places for a tent were taken and she couldn't sleep with girls in their tent 'cause it was too small. She had to prepare her own but there was only one way left to do that.

- Knock, knock - she said awkwardly, knocking on one of polls holding Arthur's tent. He was on his coot, drawing something in his journal. It catched her attention. Didn't know he's romantic soul who would sketch while sulking like this.

- How can I help ya? - he closed the book and looked at her shyly. He analysed her posture in new clothes but very quickly so it wouldn't scare her or make her uncomfortable. Girls usually didn't like his sight on them.

- Will it bother you if I will place my tent right next to yours? All good spots were taken when I took a bath - her cheeks flushed a little bit. She even tried to flirt with him and bat her eyes, while she squeezed fabric of her dress.

- It's rather if I won't bother you, kid.

If I could I would devour you right here, Mr Morgan and you would be the only person not bothering me. I would undress you from your bright blue shirt which matches your eyes so good and I would let you pop my cherry...

- You'right out there, kid? Asked ya if I won't bother you.

- N-no, never. Thank you, Mr Morgan - she jumped into the air and disappeared to set her tent. It was mirroring his and when she was looking above her trunk she could see him, deeply in his thoughts. Honestly, if they would rearrange it a little bit more they would have big, shared tent with two beds next to eachother. But she they wasn't close enough for Iris to ask for it even if she wouldn't mind.

Later that night they had supper prepared by her and Mr Pearson. Almost everyone was eating together but she noticed Arthur hidden in his spot. She went to her tent and sat on the coot mirroring his position.

- I hope it tastes good? - Iris asked after few minutes. He raised her eyes surprised at her.

- You eatin' with my poor companion? I see everyone gathering around the fire.

- They're all nice and stuff but I like to eat in peace. You're not bad to be with, Mr Morgan.

It sounded a little bit frivolous and she actually liked it, surprised with her own temper.

He blushed. Or rather tips of his ears did.

- It's just surprising 'cause yall girls are always eating together. And yes, this stew is amazing - he liked his fingers and brushed his dirty mouth with his sleeve.

Normally she would jerk away on this kind of behaviour but she giggled at sight of big man eating messy like that.

- Girls are okay, especially Tilly and Mary, but Karen has...a little bit to intense character. Oh, and Dutch's girlfriend. That lady hates me.

- She hates everybody, dont'cha worry.

- Today she hit Dutch with a book, saying he's throwing me looks - Iris was giggling and she brushed loose hair behind her ear.

- Looks, ya say? Oh don't worry, you just new, that's why he does that, kid.

- She's rather young too, you know. It's just the make-up she uses, makes her look older.

- Ya say? Nah, you still look like kid to me. With all those freckles and you being thin. Not so sure you should go with us to rob that train, I will have to watch you all the time - his voice was low and he chuckled.

Ouch, that was bad! So he doesn't like freckles...It's nothing I can do about it. But maybe if I'm gonna eat more I'll stop being thin, get some bust maybe and then-

- You sure you want to sit here with me? You seemed bored with my old feller talkin'.

- I-I am not bored at all. Can you show me what are you drawing?

He brushed his chin, sign of him being shy and he passed her the journal. On two pages he drew their whole new camp.

- I must say you can draw, Mr Morgan. You've got talent - she passed the journal back and their hands brushed against each other. She blushed again.

- Talent that's useless for sure - his voice was low and nice and he almost sounded like purring cat. Iris felt knot tying up in her stomach.

- It's not, it's not! - she shaked her head - I find it really pretty. You could draw something for me one day - it was supposed to be flirt and she bit her lower lip but he didn't notice that. He just cheered up.

- What you like, then? I can draw it for you - he patted her arm in friendly manner. They were so close right now, their faces next to each other. She could smell him.

What do I like? Your lips, your intriguing eyes, the fact that your hair was so messy and the fact you smell like whiskey, cigarettes and sweat.

- Flowers - she said plainly, looking at her feet - Any flowers are good. Or animals. I saw you sketching deer one day.

- I've been hit on my head a lot so if I would forget remind me of it, kid - she looked at him once again and licked her lower lip, becoming red on her cheeks. He started looking at her quizzically.

- I think you catched a cold, kid, you seem burning up. Better go to sleep, tomorrow's a day too.

Knot in her stomach popped and she lowered her head. Kid, you say. Im gonna show you, one day I will gain weight, have some reall boobs and nice mature dresses and you will look at me the right way. She got up a little bit too quick, tears forming in corner of her eyes but he was facing her back almost immediately and he didn't see.

- Y-you right, I don't feel my best - she answered with shaking voice and she rubbed her eyes - I'm...gonna get some rest. Goodnight, Mr Morgan.

- Uh-, yea, good night - he read her bad, he was sure she's sick but she seemed rather irritated by the fact he noticed? I will apologize tomorrow.

She put on the curtain between the halves of tent which was giving them privacy now and she sighed. At first she looked in small mirror she owned and analised her own face. You ugly, Iris.

Girl looked at herself quizzically. Big, green eyes with long lashes and nice, pink lips but then freckles happened, covering her nose and cheeks. Her hair were jet black but wavy instead of sleek locks of other girls around. Iris started undressing herself and she looked at her figure with disgust. She had round hips and long legs, but that's it. She looked thin and had small breast and that was not what men would look at. It's not what he would look at.

When she put on her night gown and layed down she looking at tents ceiling and thinking. Oil lamp in Arthur's half stopped giving light, he was going to sleep. She heard him getting comfortable on his bed and after few minutes he was breathing heavily.

She drifted away in her sleep, thinking how it would be to cuddle his big frame.

Another few weeks passed and in this time Iris tried her best to prove she's mature and strong but also femine at the same time. It was difficult to kill a man at 4 and then acting like a subtle lady few hours later. It was nice, warm evening and girls decided to go swimming after long day of work. Iris was so happy and relaxed as she and Mary - Beth was looking at red sky and Tilly with Karen was fooling around in water.

- Can I tell you a secret? You will like it - Iris whispered. Mary seemed excited immediately.

- Tell me, tell me! - she giggled

- I fell in love - Iris whispered to her ear and her friend become red from blushing.

-No way! Who, who is he? Or maybe she? - Blond girl tickled brunette a little bit.

- It's him, yes. But I wouldn't mind you...- they purred at each other and then burst into laugh.

- Who? I bet it's John, all girls are sweet on him and Abigail hates us for that.

-Nope!

- Bill!

-No!

- New O'Driscolls boy!

- Ew!

- Then who, Dutch?

- You must be crazy! I mean...he's not bad if you think about him but this red-head witch he's with? I have no chances - Iris was laughing so badly.

- You have to tell me! But then it has to be someone from outside the camp...

-No! He's there, Mary-Beth, please don't make me say his name out loud.

And then Mary became pale. Then red again. Then she got up.

-No! From all of them you choosed Arthur Morgan?!

- Shhh! We are too close to the camp!

- But why?! He's sweet but we have never seen him with woman, you know. I think he's a little bit weird about it. Dutch once laughed at him taking a bath with a dog when camp had one.

- W-Well...he seems a little awkward and he's like wild animal more than a man but he's charming and he always complemented food I make and he always talks to me in the evening.

- At least he talks to you, he usually doesn't. To no one.

- That's my problem, he talks to me but he seemes to see me as a kid. I tried everything! Few days ago I was sitting with him and we was both reading a book and I looked at him so nicely, I tried my best to look at him with hazy, flirting eyes. And he asked me if I needed glasses because I blink a lot.

- Well...I don't know how to help you - Mary said as they were walking towards camp - usually it's easy, a little bit of exposed skin and being close. You should try it.

- I should...I should go to his tent dressing my nightgown for example?

- Oh, that's an idea! I saw it and it's really cute and...hot.

-Mary- Beth, are you hitting on me? - she joked as they was passing Hosea's tent. Girls heard him talking with Arthur and they would ignore but they heard Iris's name. They started listening immediately, hiding behind the tent to eaves dropping.

- And this new girl, Iris's her name - Hosea said.

- What's with her?

- Just wanted to know what you think about her - he seemed to tease Arthur a little bit.

- It's good kid, she seems to like my company. And honestly, I like hers, she doesn't talk that much comparing to any of you fools - he cleared his throat.

- I thought that you are much closer. Basically sharing a tent and talking every evening...

- What d'ya say, Hosea?

- How long have been since you had a woman, Arthur?

- Not long enough to think about it again- his voice became angry in the nick of time - it's kid we talking about, don't get the wrong idea.

Iris inhaled sharply and bit her lower lip, while her eyes became glossy. But she listened, she couldn't stop.

- Isn't it obvious, Arthur? She looks at you very odd way and she enjoys your company a lot, lot more than others.

- I didn't notice. By the way, she's not stupid. I'm much older and I have past, just no way I would be with her. She doesn't love me to start with. One day she will leave the camp to have a normal life.

Sound of tears dropping on Iris's dress was the only sound she was making. She got up quickly and in a blink of an eye disappeared, running into the woods.

- Iris?! - Mary- Beth tried to follow her but she tripped over one of tent's strings. She sweared ugly.

This is bad, so bad - was all Iris was thinking. Her breathing heavy, her eyes red. She stopped in the middle of nowhere, just when she was sure all around her was dark forest. She didn't even know why she was so agry. Maybe because he said out loud things I thought about myself? Maybe because she was sure that his ears getting red were sign of him considering her as someone hot?

But look at yourself, c'mon. When father lived, he always told you you gonna become a maid, because no man would touch something so fragile, that looks constantly sick. He was right, oh so badly right. And now Iris had to apologise to Mary-Beth for leaving her like that.It was dark night when she got back to the camp, everyone sleeping in their tents. Only one oil lamp was glowing. She decided to act like nothing happen, just not to lose his friendship, ever. So she took a deep breath and peaked her head inside his part of tent.

- Just wanted to say good night, Mr Morgan - was all she said, smiling faintly.

- Kid! You weren't there for supper. Did something happened?

- N-no...just small fight with girls - she lied without hesitation. Then smiled a little bit more so he won't be suspicious. He always was but he was taking her lies as an answer, 'cause she lied when it would expose her feelings.

- Small fight made you disappear without word? Y'got hot head then - he joked. His blue eyes were piercing her.

- Maybe a little - he didn't see nothing good about her anyway, she could become hothead in his eyes even it was inappropriate for woman.

- Wanna talk about it?

- With you? I-I mean we can but it's nothing. Really.

- You seem sad lately, kid. Is someone or something bothering you?

- Ah...no, just stupid, girly things.

- Girly things - he seemed a little bit scared now.

- Interests of heart, to call it. Nothing too exciting, especially for you.

He became silent. So she wasn't considering him as a close friend if she didn't want to tell. He thought different for a second but...she was right, he was no friend.

- Were you ever in love, Mr Morgan? - he heard her voice from behind one of trunks. She probably lied on her bed.

- F'course I was. But if you askin' me 'bout those things ya need to share with me first, ya know? What are those Interests of heart, huh?

She took deep breath. After few seconds she knew how to tell it without being obvious.

- I just fell in love with someone who will never accept me. He's good friend and that's only reason I didn't tell him yet. But I know....I heard what's he talking about me, no need to share my feelings with him, because he considers me strongly as a friend, nothing more. It would make our relationship awkward.

He furrowed his brows. So she was seeing someone. He wondered who.

- That sounds a lil' bit bad, kiddo. Maybe I don't look like but I know how to have a broken heart - he said as his eyes become glossy. She couldn't see them anyway, so he didn't hold back thinking about Mary right now - But if it's your friend he shouldn't judge ya, ya know. Even if he doesn't share feelings with you. You sure, he does not?

- One hundred percent sure - she said that very slowly because those words left bitter on her tongue - and I'm not afraid of being judged, I just know it would destroy our friendship.

- He's no friend then - Arthur replied shortly. He felt like dumbass but if she liked talking to him about all of this he felt appreciated.

Iris took deep breath. You are a friend. The closest one I have now after those weeks that passed. And I will cherish you forever, even if your lack of knowledge will hurt me sometimes.

- He is. About this I'm sure. I really love this person. Thank you, Mr Morgan for listening to me - it sounded like she thanked him for listening but she was actually thanking him for everything.

It seemed like yesterday when they rescued her but it wasn't. Many days passed and she already shared with him many thoughts but also many jobs, even dangerous one. They robbed trains together after all. They was murdering together. And every evening they were lying in their beds and talking. They usually looked at their tent's ceiling but she didn't mind. He seemed so sad and distanced, always worried. She also noticed his extremely low self-esteem, he always was talking that he's not good man and that he's stupid on account being hit on the head to often.

She had fallen asleep to those thoughts.

[where-theres-smoak-2]

Riverdale Season 5 Trailer Thoughts/Breakdown

Yay the trailer is finally here! So excited. Anyway here is my breakdown of the trailer and my initial thoughts and theories. I do want to say real quick as a trigger warning that the trailer did have images of what appeared to be a suicide by hanging and there are images of that in this breakdown (I have put them under a tag) so if this is something you feel will upset or trigger you please be careful. Also obviously there are spoilers.  

Firstly they didn’t really give us much new content. Most of the footage was stuff we have already seen and consisted of shots from the videos the voyeur had put out and the characters staring at tv screens. But there were a few new scenes in there for us to over-analyse and go crazy over. Also most of the scenes look like they are pre time jump which to be honest I was expecting because season 5 footage could potentially spoil the ending of what would of been season 4/ the current storyline with the voyeur. 

So the first bit of new footage I think is this shot:

At least I’m pretty sure we haven’t seen it before. It’s clearly Jughead and it looks to me like he’s got a book on his lap (circled in red). Here’s the question I have, is he lighting the match to read the book because there’s no light where ever he is or is he going to burn the book. One theory I have is that from the character description for jughead’s new girlfriend it talks about a book that he’s not writing. Basically he’s struggling to write a book. Maybe this is actually a cleverly placed post time jump scene and he’s frustrated about his fight with his girlfriend over the book and so he burns it. That is the book in his lap is a draft or something of his own book. Maybe he then goes back to Riverdale to start the book over and get new inspiration. But that’s just my best guess of what’s going on here. I mean it might not even be a book in his lap. 

Next new scene is this one where Betty and Jughead are talking to Brett in prison:

Anyone who read my season 4 theory/review posts knows that I think Donna is involved in the whole voyeur plotline and is in fact the leader of a ring of voyeurs I spose you could call it. For me this scene makes me think this is even more likely. Brett says ‘something’s coming and it’s going to hit you like a mack truck.’ So he obviously knows something about the voyeur. Unfortunately I think this might also suggest that Charles could be involved, if anything is going to hit them like a mack truck it would be finding out their brother is out to get them. I really hope thats not the case though. I mean Brett could just be being dramatic right? 

Not really sure how I feel about the B*ghead scene. I talked about this in one of my reviews, about how when Betty and Jughead slept together for the first time I was uncomfortable about it because at the time Betty was lying to Jughead about having kissed Archie and to me that just didn’t seem right or fair to Jughead. This is a very similar situation. I feel like if Betty has already told Jughead about the kiss with Archie and they’ve worked it out then fine its another b*ghead sex scene whatever you know, I’m not overly invested in B*ghead but I don’t really mind them either, I’m just bored of them to be honest, so it is what it is. But if she’s still sleeping with him without having that conversation with him then I do think that’s a mistake on Betty’s part and that she isn’t being fair to Jughead. But from the look on Jughead’s face in this shot:

I think it looks like she does tell him which I am relieved about it even though it’s going to really suck to see Jughead heartbroken like this. In which case if she has told him then this could be breakup sex or it could be Jughead decides he wants to try and make it work and this is like makeup sex. If it is the latter I do think later they will both realise they just can’t make it work and they decide to part before or during the time jump. Though I do want to make it clear no matter what does happen if she does tell him or not that I would never hate on Betty, the same as when she cheated, at the end of the day she’s a teenage girl and she makes mistakes, hopefully she learns and grows from those mistakes, she has time to and the same for Archie too.  

 So prom looks like it is going to be fun, well at first anyway. It does look like Veronica is going to find out about Betty and Archie at prom which isn’t really new information:

Look as excited as I am to see Barchie and the potential of them being explored, and as bored as I am with the current couples it’s still going to be really hard to see Veronica (and Jughead) hurt. I mean look at my poor girl she’s devastated and 100% doesn’t deserve this. But I do feel like the current couples did need to be changed up a bit and breakups are always going to hurt, but it does suck to see. 

It looks like more than just relationship drama goes down at prom. There is this scene:

It’s hard to tell whether this is like on a big screen at prom or whether this happens after prom but either way it looks like someone else is going to die and this is going to be a disturbing scene. What does make me curious is this shot:

 I’m sort of confused by this scene because at first I thought this and the image above were related and there is obviously something happening, some kind of drama but we can’t see what it is. The thing is they don’t look scared. They look more shocked/ surprised. And the guy on the end next to Reggie (apparently he’s a character from Katy Keene but I just know him as Austin from a show called Make it or Break it and honestly its weird seeing him in Riverdale but I digress) he just looks really confused. My theory is that Veronica and Archie are having a fight in the middle of prom after she finds out about the kiss with Betty and Reggie is making that ooh face because Veronica has slapped Archie. I reckon something has caused Betty and Jughead to have already left prom so Jughead won’t find out until later. Another explanation could be that theory that footage of Barchie’s kiss gets shown at prom. Obviously Austin/ Character from Katy Keene is confused because he doesn’t really know anyone there so probably doesn’t have any idea what’s going on. 

(Ok so the next part is to do with that trigger warning I mentioned earlier so again please only continue if you are comfortable to do so.)

So we’ve got our first potential shot of the voyeur here wearing an owl mask. That’s not creepy at all.  

The interesting thing though is this shot:

As you can see cirlced in red this person who appears to have hung themselves is wearing that same owl mask. But I actually think this is a bit of a red herring. I think the top image is Donna, the jacket they are wearing is similar to the jackets she likes to wear and to me the build of the person in the top image is different to the build of the person in the second image. To me the top one looks more feminine and the second more masculine. Though it is hard to tell because of the difference in angles and what not. But my theory is that Jughead and Betty start to get a little too close to uncovering her so she kills someone else to make it look like the voyeur has taken their own life and throw them off. Maybe she takes a page out of Jughead’s book and fakes a death so to speak. Another possibilty is this is a re-enactment of Clifford Blossoms death and like a last message to Riverdale if I’m making sense but then it doesn’t make sense that they are wearing the owl mask and not the cliff one. It does make me wonder who this person is. They’ve got dark hair and they are wearing quite a formal suit but otherwise we don’t have much information to go off. Also I wonder if this is the same person who appears to be killed in the prom video or whether two people are going to be killed. 

Ok whoever is standing over Jellybean with a knife better have their running shoes on because I’m coming for them. I don’t think they will hurt Jellybean but I actually think this could be what they use to have FP leave the show. I think the voyeur will release videos of them all sleeping and show that they have been in their house with the knife and that they have the potential of harming them which is really really terrifying and like one of my worst nightmares. I think FP will be like Nah not my little girl and for her safety will take Jellybean and move away from Riverdale. I could see some arguments in the family where some members like jughead and Betty refuse to leave and others want them all to go. Maybe in the end Alice decides to stay to look out for Betty and also maybe help Betty, Jughead and Charles with the investigation and FP takes Jellybean. 

From these two images and that image that was released a while back of Archie in the boxing ring it looks like Archie is going to have a boxing match I know an amazing deduction there what can I say I’m a true detective. There’s not really much that can be said about it. I’m not sure why he is having a match, maybe something to do with the navy if he hasn’t already decided to join the army instead? Or maybe its more Hiram Lodge shananigans. Hopefully Archie will win. But it does look like Archie won’t be the only one getting into fisticuffs. 

 Looks like Jughead will be having an altercation with someone as well. I think it might have something to do with the voyeur because you can see a projector in the background with images of houses on them. But I can’t tell who the people in the picture are. If I were to take a guess I would say its possibly that tickle ring. I said in my season 4 theories that I think Terry the ticklemaster is involved in the voyeur plot as he would be able to get the ‘actors’ for the videos. But who knows like I said its hard to see from these pictures. 

Speaking of the voyeur it looks like the next person they want to mess with is Archie with an re-enactment of the blackhood in the diner. I have a horrible feeling that this is only the end of that video and it will also show someone in a Fred mask getting shot first then we’ll see this image of the blackhood holding Archie at gunpoint. Obviously this is going to be soo upsetting for Archie and is going to bring back up his grief at having lost his father. I feel like this will happen after prom too so I feel like he’s going to have just broken up with Veronica then get home to this video. I think he’ll then go for a run to try and let out some of his emotions and end up at his father’s grave where he’ll have a bit of a break down. I mean poor Archie. I’m going to cry at this scene I just know it. 

So this picture is one of the ones I’m most curious about. Now I’m pretty sure that this is one of Cheryl’s dresses, like I can’t remember where I’ve seen her in it but I am 90% sure I have seen her in it. Also to me this looks like the crypt under their house where she kept Jason and where her uncle was killed. Cheryl wasn’t wearing this dress when her uncle was killed so its not his blood on the dress unless she wore it when getting rid of the body. I did wonder if it was the voyeur’s way of letting Cheryl and Toni know that they knew what they had done. But it does beg the question of why is there blood on the dress. Was Cheryl wearing it when it got the blood on it? Or did the voyeur take it and wear it whilst killing someone then bring it back? One theory I have is maybe someone is messing with Toni and the others and Cheryl goes missing then this dress shows up and it looks like Cheryl has been killed but obviously she won’t be. I am interested to see what this is about. 

Ok so the last scene I want to talk about is this one:

I actually think, like the first image, this might be post time jump. Betty’s hair looks a little different here. Although it is pulled back she has got some bits of hair framing her face which is not normal for betty. Usually when her hair is up it is all scraped back. Also I know it sounds odd but she just looks more grown up to me. Also she seems alot more confident in holding a gun now which if she’s been training with the FBI would make sense. As to what is going on in this scene it could be exactly what it appears Betty hears something down stairs and theres some kind of threat down there. But I actually think this might be more of a comic scene. My scenario is as I said I think FP will take Jellybean away from Riverdale. It’s possible that Alice will than go join them after the kids graduate and go to college. I think this scene could be where Betty has come back to Riverdale and is in her old home (from what I can tell from these images it looks like her old house) some freaking stuff has happened in Riverdale since she’s arrived back you know a murder here and murder there and she’s hiome alone when she hears a noise downstairs, investigates gun drawn and its actually Alice showing up in the middle of the night unexpectedly. The both get a scare. 

So what did you guys think of the trailer? Are you excited for season 5? Do you have any theories on what you think will happen? 

[p4lparker]

Lost

We both remained still, as if that would stop the embarrassment from setting in. Stiles was still pressed against my back, hell he was still inside me. I had never been so mortified in my entire life; I'd come close a couple of times, when I fell off the stage and broke my arm during the play in 6th grade, the time I ran into the front entrance doors at school last week and finally the first time I experienced my monthly friend- I was with Scott and Stiles at the time. But none of that even compared to having the Sheriff walk in on you doing the do… with his son. I truly hoped that, that didn't actually just happen and that we were experiencing some weird 'What if' scenario. I wished the earth would just swallow me whole- Stiles and his Jeep too. We were gonna get 'the talk' from Stiles' dad. The friggen Sheriff was gonna tell me to make sure his kid wraps it before he taps it. I changed my mind. That would be the most embarrassing moment of my life to date.

 I wriggled, and sighed waiting for Stiles to pull himself together and pull out. He got the message, grasping my hips and drawing his own back and away from- he was released from me with a mildly disgusting sound. I shimmied my tights and undies back up my legs, trying to right my rumpled and disturbed outfit- when I was fully dressed I turned to look at the man who'd just ravaged me.. He was too trying to redress himself, though he looked like he was going to be sick. I reached a hand out to him, but he flinched away slightly, before letting me rest my fingers gently on his lightly stubbled cheek.

He nuzzled into my touch before jerking back and moving to get into his Jeep. I followed suit, getting in and buckling up. The engine started and, the atmosphere inside was tense and almost awkward. The cab was silent, not even the load groaning of the old, abused engine was enough to distract from the tense silence. I looked over at Stiles, his face was still pale- he looked like he was going to pass out.. or die one of the two. I guess he felt worse than I did, I mean it was his dad catching him humping me at the side of the road. In the process of analysing Stiles, he turned to face me; his usually happy mocha coloured eyes looked sad. I felt him reach out and grasp my hand- he held it softly in his own, gently squeezing it every now and then. Though the cab still remained silent. He was comforting me, letting me know everything would work out.

 Even though Stiles took the long route home, we arrived at the Stilinski residence all too soon. The Sheriff's cruiser was already sat in the driveway, and the lights were on in the front room. He was there. He was waiting for us.. Waiting for the most uncomfortable conversation in the history if uncomfortable conversations to take place. Stiles heaved a heavy sigh and slowly let the air leave his lungs as he unbuckled his seat belt and gestured to the front door- with an awkward sort of nod, in its general direction. I followed his motions, unbuckling and jumping out of the cab as slowly as humanly possible. I wanted to prolong the time before the end of my sanity as much as I could. We were soon situated on the well-worn couch, Sheriff Stilinski sat in his armchair. He was leant forwards, his elbows resting on his knees; hands clasped in front of his mouth and eyebrows furrowed. I shifted my eyes to look at Stiles, he was sat on the couch next to me. He was sat in a similar way to his father, though he was running his fingers through his short hair- which was steadily becoming longer. I on the other hand, sat scrunched up, I was trying to hide from the embarrassment. I watched as the Sheriff looked up at Stiles and I- he looked almost as pale as us, and his hazel eyes looked haunted. He removed his hands from his mouth, rubbing them over his face as if trying to rub away the memories or to fend off an on-coming headache.

 "How long has this been happening? I think that's a starting point and we'll move on from there..." Sheriff asked, he sounded drained, and the worst was still to come.

 "Its recent.. as in very recent.. as in so recent we don't really know what's happening.. and just gahhh..." Stiles muttered, shifting awkwardly. I watched from the corner of my eye as he turned to face me. "I mean.. is there something happening? or like.. hnngg.." Stiles was rambling, it was uncomfortable to witness. But it was true, all he said was true, it was new and we didn't even know if there was actually anything happening between us. Which was suddenly making this whole exchange with his dad all the more painful and scarring for all involved. I turned my head fully to look directly at him, I looked directly into his eyes- searching him for answers. I didn't really know how I felt about the whole situation. I mean, I liked Stiles- I was friends with him. And I really liked having sex with him. But was there more to it? Were there other feelings there? I wasn't sure. And from the lost look in his eyes, neither was he. I turned to face his dad.

 "In all honesty, we aren't sure. We don't really know what's happening between us. But when we do figure it out, we'll let you know?" I said it all as a question, before looking to Stiles for confirmation. He nodded, which made me release a breath of wasn't even sure I was holding. Turning to face the Sheriff again and he just looked bemused, as if mine and Stiles' explanation was stated in Klingon or something.

 "Right, well that's by not all that insightful.. but I guess it'll do for now. Next question, you protected yourselves right? Cause pregnancy isn't the only thing that can happen... I mean there are other issues here, not saying that either of you have other issues.. but you need to be safe about this type of stuff.. A kid isn't for Christmas- its for life.." Stiles' dad said, and he looked even more humiliated to be saying things like that. I think I could even see his cheeks burn a light red at the end of his little rant. I could feel the laughter bubbling up inside, this was awkward enough- I did not need to be bursting into a fit of mortified giggles. I felt Stiles grab my hand and squeeze hard, letting me know not to bust up.

 "Look dad, we get it. We have been safe, and if it happens again or anymore we will continue to use protection. But the kid comment.. this is a safe sex conversation.. not an adopt a dog commercial. It was just painful. Now Y/N and I are gomna work on some homework and stuff.. Later Dad..." Stiles said shaking his head. The Sheriff nodded his head, Stiles grabbed my hand and began to lead me to the stairs- we were half way up them before we were stopped by his Dad calling after us.

"And leave the door open.." The Sheriff's voice seemed to carry itself behind us- like a creepy stalker. I cringed, feeling almost like he was saying it directly into my ear, that phrase had an effect on Stiles also- his whole body tensed, from his shoulders down to his feet. This moment seemed to drag on, almost for a life-time, before Stiles jerkily gripped my hand tighter and dragged me more quickly up the stairs.

 To say the next few hours were tense and incredibly awkward was the understatement of the century. Stiles and I barely made eye contact, let alone physical. It was painful, as soon as I stepped foot in his room, I was flooded with memories of what had transpired here only hours ago. I felt the familiar tingle and heat settle in the pit of my stomach, that thrill running through my body. And I was mortified, here we were in Stiles' room, studying and there I am practically moaning at memories! I tried to focus on the paragraph of information in front of me- but I just couldn’t reign in my imagination or my thoughts. Which kept drifting back to the way Stiles’ fingers had grazed over my skin, had gripped with an almost bruising strength. The way his lips had marked me as his own- blossoming purple splotches on my chest and stomach. I wriggled around on Stiles’ bed, trying to get rid of the lust that was rushing through my body- hoping that if I moved or changed the way I was sitting, it would stop me having those thoughts or memories trickling through my brain.

I crossed one leg over the other, so my thighs were pressed together in an attempt to create some much needed friction. Though my efforts were in vain, nothing would ease this ache. I looked around in frustration, the only way to help this situation was to help myself. I looked to Stiles, he was unfazed- it was almost as if this wasn’t affecting him at all. I shuffled along the bed, getting closer to him- I was trying to be subtle about things. Once I was sidled up to him, I could feel the heat his body was throwing off seep through the layers of clothes I had on covering my quaking body, excitement was running down my body trickling all the way to my trembling fingers.  I watched as Stiles, forced his eyes to stay on the page he was focused on- I allowed one hand to spider walk up his arm. Following the line of his body, my fingers reached his shoulder. I slide my body closer to his own, my head resting on his shoulder closer to his neck; that soft creamy coloured skin, that was practically begging me to colour it. Stiles turned his face to look at me, brows furrowed in concentration and confusion, his soft and full lips pouted and looking as kissable as always.

“What uhh, what are you doing?” He asked, his voice deeper from not being used for a time- it’s baritone sending a shiver down my spine and adding to the heat boiling over inside my belly. I just smiled in response, moving my beaming lips closer to the pale column of his throat. I watched his Adams apple bob as he swallowed. Biting my lip to restrain the giggle that was bubbling, I contained myself before puckering against the taunting skin before me. Gently I kissed my way up the length of his neck, I could feel Stiles shift beside me. I could tell he was beginning to feel the effects of my lips- I could feel the effects I was having on his body. He became tense; shoulders straightening and muscles taut, neck bending more to the side to allow me more access to that delectable creamy flesh, his breathing quickened, his bottom lip was drawn between his teeth and being bitten down on harshly, his mocha eyes were closed tightly. I sat, face nuzzled into the crook of his neck- lips attacking him, I let my hand wander down his body. I could feel his stomach muscles pulling in and dancing as my fingers tickled the skin carefully, before continuing their journey down to his lap. I rubbed my fingers gently over zipper, feeling his cock twitch in anticipation. Applying a little more pressure, I rubbed more fully on the bulge that was beginning to form. Scraping my teeth against his skin before sucking it into my mouth. I wanted to mark him as mine, for the world to see.

His answering groan was quiet, but I still heard it. Biting and sucking harder. Leaving my signature on his skin. My fingers were itching to relieve his zipper, to pull it down it’s track and release him- so I could see him and feel him, use my mouth or my hands for my own sick pleasure and his. But just as my fingers danced over to the top of his zipper- preparing to pull in down, I heard foot steps thudding up the stairs. I hastily pulled my hands and lips away from Stiles’ waiting body, shoving myself away from him and towards the head of his bed- picking up the book I’d left there I continued to ‘study’ the pages in front of me. I shifted my eyes to watch Stiles, he was shaking his head as if trying to rid the cobwebs or shake the lust from his system. I gazed at his eyes; they seemed darker almost black- like his dilated pupils.  I bit my lip as I held in the smirk that was begging to claim my features. I managed to get my mouth under control just in time, Stiles’ dad poked his head around the open.

“Hey. I uh, I just got called into work.. I don’t wanna be that Dad- but from what I saw today I think I have to be. So uhh, Y/N- I uh think it’s time you should go. Maybe you could study more at home or something, and you’re welcome to come around whenever I’m around and stuff. But for a couple of days I want you guys to cool it..” Sherriff stated, I could tell he felt awful for this- but I could also see his point. I mean, we were lucky in a way that it was him that caught us this afternoon. If it had been any other police office, they’d have surely written us up or even dragged us to the station. And that would have been even more mortifying than what had already happened. I just smiled tightly and nodded- beginning to pack up all of my stuff and preparing to leave.

“Dad, c’mon. Don’t you think that’s a little much? I mean with the door open and then asking Y/N to leave.. Is it really necessary?” Stiles began to protest, his voice tight. From being annoyed at my dismissal and the fact that he was sporting an impressive tent in his jeans. I grabbed his hand to try and stop the possible conflict that was brewing before me. I could see both Stillinski men were boiling with anger, that was yearning to be let loose. At the touch of my hand, Stiles calmed down slightly. Bowing his head as a way to show his acceptance and submission. I watched as the Sherriff sighed, shook his head and then rubbed a hand over his face- almost as if he regretted this. I just smiled in what was hopefully a reassuring manner. Shoving my books in my bag and grabbing it up off the floor I went to follow the Sherriff from Stiles room, though as I passed by the end of the bed Stiles stood and grabbed my hand. Preventing me from going too far, tugging me back to him. So our chests met abruptly, the hand that wasn’t gripping my own trailed its way up to my neck. Cupping it and pulling my face towards his own. Our lips met tenderly, just pushing gently against each other- until Stiles decided he needed more, until I was craving a more solid and substantial goodbye.

His lips pushed more furiously against my own, lips trying to pry my own open, his tongue seeking my own out to taunt and tease with his own. I felt his teeth nip at my bottom lip playfully before he let his tongue run along it to soothe any pain there may have been. Soon, almost too soon- he pulled back slowly. As if testing his restraint to not yank me back and kiss me to death. I smiled faintly at him and stroked my free hand over his cheek, feeling the faint stubble that was beginning to cover his lower face.

“Skype you when I get in? I’m gonna miss your face..” I joked, before pulling away from him gently as a throat being cleared was heard from the door way. I looked over my shoulder to see the Sherriff looking slightly bashful, before nodding his head to the hall next to him. I nodded, as I heard Stiles sigh again, nodding himself in answer to my previous question. I made my way from his room and house and began the short walk back home. It was empty, as I assumed it would be- I quickly ran up the stairs to my room. I jumped in the shower quickly, thinking quickly through the devious plan that had just sprung to my mind as I journeyed home. Once I had finished washing off I jumped out the shower and dried off quickly. I returned to my bedroom and checked that nobody was in still, it was starting to get dark, the house was still empty apart from me, I walked to my bedroom door and locked it- ensuring I wouldn’t be disturbed. I quickly raced to my drawers, searching through the ridiculous amounts of underwear and bras, investigating for a specific number I’d bought with hopes to wear it for someone special at some point. It appeared Stiles was that special person. I pulled on the blue lacy numbers. Jumping onto the bed and lying on my side, when I was ready, grabbing my laptop and setting to start up skype. I called Stiles quickly, making sure my camera was off for now- Stiles answered right away.

“Hey, you wanna carry on studying together? We could quiz each other?” I spoke into the mike, I watched as Stiles nodded- his mouth full off a handful or two of chips. I grinned, watching as he pulled out his books ready to start with studying.

“I’m sorry for the way my dad was acting earlier… It was just so embarrassing. And he had no right to throw you out or anything.. and I guess I’m just well sorry..” I could hear the aggravation in his voice watching as he shook his head, rubbing a hand over his face.

“Hey don’t worry about it, he was kinda right. Maybe we should cool off for a couple of days..” I stated nonchalantly, trailing off as a confused and upset look crossed Stiles’ face. I bit my tongue to stop the giggles from escaping.

“I uh..  I don’t understand what you mean.. And your camera isn’t on by the way..” Stiles uttered, his voice wavering slightly as he tried to wrap his mind around my words and their meaning- though he didn’t realise I was just playing with him like some kind of predatory animal playing with it’s prey before eating it. Though I wasn’t going to eat Stiles, I was just going to torture him some more.

“Yeah, maybe we should cool off.. But that doesn’t mean we have to stop seeing each other..” I say, smirking as I turn the camera on. I watched as he stared at the picture that revealed itself to him. His eyes widened slightly and his mouth dropped open, he raised one hand to run through his hair- fingers twisting and tugging on the ends of it. I could feel myself grin, and only hoped that it didn’t appear as feral as it felt.

“Oh god..” Stiles whispered as he stared desperately at the screen, captivated as I moved my hand to trail up and down my side- each time getting dangerously close to my breasts. I smirked as Stiles gulped, his eyes trained on my hand as I cupped on of my breasts giving a light squeeze- letting out a faint moan. Which had him almost growling in response.

“D-d-do you uhhh, need me to c-come over or something?” He whispered, watching intently as I continued to squeeze at my confined breasts. I shook my head giggling lightly.

“No, you stay right where you are babe. I’m gonna give you a little show..” I taunted before moving the laptop further away from me. I stood from the bed, turning my back to the screen- pressing play on my sound system- letting the music flow through the speakers. I listened to the beat of the song carefully before beginning to sway my hips in time. Turning to face the laptop again, I watched as Stiles leaned forwards in his seat, I slipped one hand up to the shoulder strap of my bra flicking it from my shoulder and letting it slip down, before doing the same to the opposite strap. I turned from him looking over my shoulder and watching as he bit his lip, I reached for the final strap on the bra- undoing it and letting the garment slide from my body completely. I swayed my hips a little more, shaking my ass to tease him a little more. I trailed my hands gently up and down my sides before pushing my thumbs into the lace cheekies I was wearing to rid them from my body. Once I was completely naked, I continued to sway my hips before I span to face the screen again Stiles was leaning back in his desk chair- his lip still between his teeth and one hand was suspiciously hidden underneath the desk. I grinned and let my hands wander to the apex of my thighs, feeling just how wet I was getting.

A groan came from the laptop on my bed, I watched as Stiles stood abruptly. He fumbled with his zipper and button on his jeans before he aggressively tugged his jeans and boxers down to his knees before he took his seat once more. I watched in interest as he pushed his chair back from the desk slightly and altered the angle of the screen so I could see all of him. His now black eyes were still glued to the screen, he spit on his hand and then lowered it to the place I had been dreaming of for the last few hours. His cock was standing to attention, resting on his belly- leaking slightly, I could almost see the thick veins straining on the underside of it, the head looked delicious as it was stained a dark pink waiting to be relieved by something; I licked my lips in anticipation and let a moan slip free, this man had a truly beautiful cock. I’d had him only mere hours before- but my body craved him all the more. He pumped himself slowly as he watched me standing bare before him, one hand buried between my thighs. I dipped my finger between the soaked folds, wetting my fingers before they led themselves to the sensitive bundle of nerves. I rolled it beneath my fingers, pressing with more pressure as I massaged in figure of eights. Stiles was watching avidly, moving his hand up and down his length more quickly. My eyes were glued to him pumping himself, he squeezed himself and lifted his hips up slightly.

“C-c-come closer, I want to see you.. Need to see you..” Stiles groaned out, I practically ran to the bed and threw myself onto it. I shifted the laptop around until it was at the foot of the bed and I was at the head of it- I bent my legs at the knees and then spread them to allow Stiles a view of how wet I was. Of how much I was wanting and needing him. I let my fingers wander back to my needy clit, rubbing and rolling at it letting out moans and mewling sounds at the pleasure and for Stiles’ benefit. I watched in fascination as he continued to pump himself furiously. I could feel a trickle of wetness drip from between my thighs.

“U-use your fingers.. Like I would.. O-o-one then add a-another for me..” Stiles moaned. I nodded, biting my lip as I did as he said. My finger was wet enough to slip in I pumped it in and out a few times slowly, allowing myself to get used to the sensation. I heard Stiles groan he was pumping himself quicker- nearing his end I could tell. The way his mouth was dropping open in an ‘o’ shape, and his moans were flowing freely and more quickly. I slid another finger inside myself, the wet sounds that were coming from me only excited the pair of us further- I swear the noises I was making only forced me to become wetter. I pushed my fingers quicker and more ferociously inside myself hoping to reach my end soon, as the coil of pleasure wound itself tighter and tighter within my belly. With one hand buried between my folds and pushing myself further towards that delectable ecstasy, my other hand drifted up to my breasts, I cupped my left one in my hand and massaged and squeezed. I moaned louder, I was so close. I just needed to push Stiles that little bit further.

“Stiles..” I whined out, I opened my eyes slightly and watched as Stiles pumped his hand up and down more forcefully two or three times before he tensed. His shoulders hunching. Hand stilling, I could feel the beginnings of my own peak wash over me. That coil finally snapping. It felt like a balloon had finally had too much air blown into it and burst from the pressure. A loud, almost embarrassingly loud, moan left my lips.

“Ffffuuuck..” I heard Stiles groan out. I knew he too had reached his end, filling his hand with his delicious essence, the one I wished I was tasting at this moment. I opened my eyes to see Stiles breathing heavily and almost in sync with myself.

“Well shit. I uh.. Really like studying with you..” Stiles chuckled cheekily. I grinned in response before laughing with him. I watched him quickly wipe his hand on a random serviette he had lying on his desk beside him. I just stayed where I was basking in the after-glow. Stiles and I continued talking about nothing in particular. The conversation was easy, considering we were both still partially naked or completely bare in my own case.

“Shouldn’t you like put some clothes on or something? Cause no offence but you’re uhh you’re kinda distracting me..” Stiles stated, I smiled and nodded. Leaving my position to pull on some undies and then searching for one of the many shirts I’d stolen from Stiles and yanking it on. I returned to my previous position on the bed and grinned as Stiles’ eyes flashed with recognition at the shirt he’d perhaps been looking for- yet was in my possession. I glanced to the clock at the bottom right hand corner of my computer screen and noticed the time, it was quite late and I should be getting some rest, considering I didn’t get much the night before. And I was going to see Stiles tomorrow anyways, he was picking me up for school.

We said our goodbyes, Stiles’ was only slightly disappointed- and I settled in to bed. Letting my thoughts wander to the brown eyed boy who’d just occupied my laptop screen, he was beginning to occupy more of my time and thoughts also. I smiled and let my eyes slip shut as my mind replayed the way Stiles would groan and moan, only making me more excited for what the next day and our next encounter would bring.

[diamondcamefromhell]

Timeless love

Jaskier x Female reader series part 2

[PART 1]

Summary:  This is an AU, where Y/N is a young woman, trying to make ends meet with her freelancing writing job. She lives in her small Nottingham studio apartment along with her cat Apollo. Things change when one evening as she is waiting for her taxi, she meets what she thinks is Joey Batey, but the man in front of her is convinced he’s Jaskier, a character from her current favorite show. Y/N now has to figure out what to do.

Warning: Swearing

Word count: 1,877

NOTE:

This is a slowburner, as there isnt too much going on yet, but i’d assume it would take a bit for them both to become more comfortable around eachother. next part stuff starts to pick some paste up, but there are more trigger warnings in that one, sorry in advance. however, i hope you enjoy this, as i try to navigate jaskier in our world

as per usual, any and all feedback is appreciated. and requests are open!

I put my phone in my purse again, not taking my eyes off the man in front of me. I basically dragged a complete stranger into my home. But he looked exactly like Joey, or Jaskier. Whatever. I was confused. As we continue staring at each other, Apollo walks towards us, rubbing himself on Jaskier’s feet.

My cat seemed to trust him. And I trusted my cat.

“Sit down.” I say, gently. “I will get you some water.”

“What is this?” He looks around, still scared. But he follows my words, sitting down. I pour some sparkling water, but then realize it might freak him out. Does he know what this is? I sigh, pouring regular spring water instead.

“My home.” I hand him the glass, which he begins examining. “The feline is my cat, Apollo.”

“Okay. Why am I here?” He asks, putting the glass on my coffee table. His red outfit really stands out in front of my brown couch. I wrap my hands around my stomach.

“I couldn’t leave you on the streets.” I say, using the voice I use when I talk to babies. “It’s not safe for you, Jaskier.”

“And I am safe, here?” I hear strong doubt in his voice, as my shoulders drop.

“I know this isn’t… the finest place you could stay at, but it’s the safest one you’ve got.” I sit down next to him. My coach can barely fit three people, but he moves as far away from me as physically possible. I pretend not to notice. “I need you to tell me, what is the last thing you remember?”

“I had a fight with Geralt. I decided to leave him alone, so I walked off. I suddenly got really tired, probably from all the traveling, so I stopped for a quick nap. I woke up and you were there. And I was here.” I can tell he’s confused, but it seems what he last remembers is what happened in the show. Great. This meant nothing to me.

“Okay.” I say, pressing my lips together. I knead my arms, staring at Apollo, who has now jumped on the table and fixed his gaze on our guest.

“You said I was in Nottirnam?” I can’t help but chuckle.

“Nottingham.” I correct him, as he nods.

“Where is that? I never heard on such place in the Continent.” My heart drops as I look him in the eyes. I can tell he’s still very much on edge, but he doesn’t seem to be scared anymore.

“Not a place in the Continent, I’m afraid.” My voice drops, as I wonder what his reaction will be.

“Then where?” Surprisingly, he manages to stay calm.

“England.” My word turns into a whisper.

I don’t know who he actually is, but I felt for this man. He is convinced he’s Jaskier, this must be so scary. He’s so far from home. Completely alone. Just like I was, when I rented this place. Now it’s my home. Hope it can offer some shelter for him, until we figure things out.

I look at the man, who seems lost in his thought. Apollo sees the opportunity, jumping on Jaskier, startling him. But he doesn’t push the animal off, instead pets him, until he starts to purr. I notice that our guest is also a little bit more relaxed. I stand up, going to my bed, taking a blanket and a pillow off it, bringing it to the couch.

“You can rest on the bed, I’ll take the couch.” He stares at me blankly, and I wonder if they have couches where he thinks he came from. I point to the bed. “You can sleep there. I will sleep here.”

I see him compare the two sleeping options.

“Couch is good for me.” He says, as my heart skips a beat. He manages to stay kind even in a moment of pure chaos. I give him the pillow and the blanket. I look at the clock, realizing it’s not that late.

“Are you hungry?” I ask as he shrugs. At the mention of food, however, Apollo wakes up and meows. “I’ll take that as a yes, boys.”

I go behind the couch to my small kitchen. I notice how Jaskier doesn’t move an inch, sitting there like a statue. I sigh, taking out a pot, running some water in it. I will cook some pasta.

I am surprised how I manage to stay this calm. I guess I know if I freak out too, it will be bad. And I want to help this guy, maybe because he looks exactly like Jaskier and is convinced he is Jaskier. Maybe because he just seems lost and scared. Maybe because I am simply stupid, bringing an insane person in.

Or maybe part of me wanted to believe it was really Jaskier. Somehow, in my world. Sent from the stars.

The water boils quicker than I expect, so I pour pasta in, mixing it. I see Jaskier stealing glances at me, as I realize he probably has never seen a stove.

“Come here.” I call out. He thinks, for a moment, but then springs to his feet, walking to me. His eyes analyse everything, and he is still clinging to his lute. “You can put your instrument down.”

“Okay.” He follows my words directly, putting it right at his feet. A sigh, picking it up and moving it out of the way. I put the lute, leaning it on the side of the fridge. His eyes scan it.

“It’s a fridge.” I say, trying to force a cheery tone. I feel like I am explaining things to a child. But for him, this was all new. “It keeps things cold inside of it.”

“How?” I shrug, as he raises his eyebrows. “Magic?”

“Technology, magic – the same thing.” I say under my breath, before going back to the stove. “This is the stove. It’s where you can cook your food. Careful, however, it is hot. And don’t ask me how it’s hot, Jaskier. I am a simple-minded woman, I don’t care about things like that.”

“Y/N?” I glance at him, mixing our pasta. It’s weird to hear him say my name. “Thank you.”

“I haven’t done anything.” I murmur, hiding my blush my turning away.

“But you’re trying. We will figure something out, we will get home.” Oh. He still thinks I am from the Continent, lost in this world, too. While I was lost, his home was not mine. I didn’t have a heart to tell him.

“We will.” I promise, as Apollo meows.

“It is impressive how you adapted.” Jaskier keeps blabbering, as I turn the stove off. I pour the water off and add some butter, placing some pasta in two bowls. I am weird like that, I like my pasta plain. I hope Jaskier doesn’t mind it too much either.

I silently walk to the coach, lost in the thought, as he follows me, blabbering on. Just how naïve can one be, to trust a stranger so easily? I remembered how Joey said that Jaskier was like a puppy. Falling in love with everyone. I hand this puppy-person his pasta, as he sits down, still talking. This time he doesn’t try to be as far away from me as possible.

Trust so easily. You get hurt even easier.

I eat my pasta, and Jaskier follows, finally shutting up. I usually would be watching something on my laptop now, but I wasn’t sure if Jaskier was ready for moving pictures just yet. It would make him completely lose his mind. And if I opened my laptop, first thing he would see would be, well… himself.

He begins questioning what kind of meal this is, and as I begin to explain what pasta is, his eyes spark up. He seems so genuinely interested. How can it be so interesting, I may never know. When we finish our meal, he even goes for his water. I stare at him.

“Why are you staring, Y/N?” I look away, still lost in thought.

“You must be so scared.” I say, quietly. In the corner of my eye, I see his shoulders drop a little. “This is a complete different world than the one you came from. So, so different.”

“But you know our world. You can remind me, if I begin to forget.” He says, cheerfully. When I look at him, though, his eyes seem cold. “And you said we will figure it out. Until then, I hope you can guide me.”

“I will.” I promise, looking at Apollo, who meows at my feet. “But I don’t know where to start.”

“Well. Who knows, maybe the answer will come to us tomorrow.” I take the hint.

I take the bowls to the sink, making a note to wash them tomorrow, when we wake up. We need to rest, although I doubted sleep would come easily to either of us. But who knows. I leave Jaskier with Apollo, as I wash my face and change from my dress. I walk back and Jaskier seems surprised at the appearance change, but chooses not to comment.

“Sleep well, Jaskier.” I say, as he gets comfortable on the couch. I see Apollo has made himself comfortable at his feet. “You too, Apollo.”

“Have a good dream, Y/N.” Jaskier says, already yawning, and I wonder, if sleep will find him easily.

I turn the lights off, covering myself under my blankets. It’s weird to hear someone else breathe in my apartment, aside from me, and Apollo, who sometimes snores. I keep listening to it, as a reminder that this is real. He is really here.

Sleep doesn’t come. I twist from side to side, restless. Until I hear Jaskier move. My eyes focus on him, as he sits on the coach.

“Shh Apollo, don’t wake Y/N up.” I hear him whisper, as my heart skips a beat. I pretend to be asleep, covering most of my face. I keep my eyes on him though.

He looks so sad, leaning back on a coach, looking around. His hand anxiously pets Apollo, who is meowing at the bard. Jaskier proceeds to stand up, tiptoeing around my apartment. He goes out of my vision, but I hear lute sing a little.

He must’ve went for his instrument.

He comes back to the coach, lute at hand. He places it on his knees, staring at it. I would pay to know what is going on in his head exactly. I wish he would just sing his feelings out. Do whatever to make himself feel better. But he just silently stares at the instrument.

It must remind him of home. I wonder if he will ever get to see it again. We don’t even know how he ended up here, yet alone how to get him back. And I am feeding him lies, giving him a false sense of security.

I will eventually have to tell him the truth. Show him, well, himself. Break his heart even more. He was thrown into the deep end, not given a lifeline. The storm is just beginning, how can I even begin to help him?

I close my eyes, praying to God I don’t start crying.

Tonight in this room, we have two broken hearts.

[PART THREE]

~~~~~~~~~~

TAG LIST [if you wish to be added or removed from this list, feel free to let me know, could be in replies, could be private message x]

@viyamystic ; @ultracolorfulnerdcollection

[saikostories]

BTS - Because of me (Yoongi)

“Fifteen til showtime,” the stage manager warned Yoongi by sticking his head into the group’s dressing room.

Yoongi was the only person still here. Every other member had gone out to do last preparations before going on stage but Yoongi was tired. He had a nightmare last night, so he barely slept, and he was getting ready for the performance the whole day today, so he couldn’t take any naps to make up for his lack of sleep, either.

On top of that, he was worried about you not texting him back. You had gone out to have dinner with your friend and you’d told him you would text him when you returned back home but it was now almost three hours later, and he still hadn’t heard from you.

Sending you the thirteenth text in the past half an hour, Yoongi sighed and got up from the sofa on which he had tried to get some rest before he became too worried about you to even consider the possibility of falling asleep.

And then finally, just as he had given up, his phone buzzed, indicating a text message from you.

             YOU [09:47pm]: phone’s dead, so sorry for not texting you back. charging it now! good luck at the show, love you!

Exhaling in relief, Yoongi shook his head. Just one exclamation point after the declaration of love and he had already forgiven you for making him worry so much.

              YOONGI [09:48pm]: no problem, glad you’re safe & okay. talk to you after the show, love you

You didn’t reply again but, this time, Yoongi wasn’t as nervous. Now he knew you were home, so he finally joined the rest of his groupmates as they jumped around, warming up for the show.

“Did you get in touch with her?” Namjoon asked, noticing Yoongi’s arrival.

Yoongi hadn’t even told him he was waiting for your text but Namjoon was always intuitive about this. He claimed Yoongi wore all of his anxiety about you on his face, although the other members never suspected anything.

“I did,” Yoongi said, unable to help the small smile spreading on his lips. That tended to happen every time he talked about you and it thoroughly amused everyone. “Her phone died. She’s okay.”

“She always is,” Namjoon said gently.

“Yeah, I know that, but…” Yoongi hesitated, glancing at the watch on his wrist. They still had about eight minutes left before they had to go on stage. “Ah, I don’t know. I guess I’m just on edge because of the bad dream I had tonight.”

“What was the dream about?” the leader asked, crossing his arms over his chest and frowning slightly. Namjoon got bad dreams, too, but none of them were so horrible that he couldn’t still get enough rest. And, to be honest, he’s never heard of Yoongi having a dream that bad before, either, hence the natural curiosity.

“It started out as one of those cliché nightmares,” Yoongi said, his eyes glazing over as he stared at the equipment around them, losing himself in the memory of the dream. “I was running through a dark forest. I thought I was running from someone but then I realized I wasn’t. I was actually chasing someone. As I got closer to the person, I realized I was actually chasing… Y/n.”

Yoongi stopped to check Namjoon’s reaction but he seemed unphased, so he continued, “and she’s running from me, b-but I’m not really me, you know? Because she’s screaming for help. She’s screaming my name. She wants me to help her. But I can’t help her b-because I’m the one chasing her.”

Namjoon considered this for a moment. Yoongi was a bit of a cynic when it came to dreams. He insisted they didn’t mean anything, so he didn’t really care about what he saw when he was asleep – that’s why Namjoon found it so interesting and, perhaps, slightly off-putting that Yoongi would be so concerned about this particular dream.

“I know you don’t believe in this stuff,” Namjoon said. “But I’m sure this dream was just the projection of your inner anxiety about the relationship. The fact that you’re chasing her might mean that you think you’re making it difficult for her. Maybe because you’re an idol and she isn’t. And since she’s running away from you but still calling you for help probably means that you think she’s putting up with all of this because she loves you but what she really wants is for you to… just be a normal, simple person. I don’t know, that’s just my, uh, interpretation.”

Namjoon added that last part because he saw heaviness on Yoongi’s face. He knew he hit everything head-on, especially the part about Yoongi’s constant concern for his relationship, but he didn’t mean to cause Yoongi even more worry by interpreting his dream. He was just trying to ease his mind since, clearly, the nightmare had left the older member alarmed.

“Look, I’m sure the dream doesn’t mean anything,” Namjoon gave in then, even though he wasn’t sure about anything at all. But he knew that sometimes, you were meant to say things you didn’t mean just to make the people you loved feel better.

“What if it does but you’re just understanding it wrong?” Yoongi asked, his open-minded attitude towards dream analysis surprising Namjoon. “What if the dream means that I have these two different personalities?”

“Ah. Kind of like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde?”

“Yeah, uh, that,” Yoongi nodded although he wasn’t familiar with the details of the book Namjoon had just mentioned. “Or Fight Club.”

Namjoon understood. “You don’t have two personalities, hyung.”

“No, not to you, maybe, because we’re in this together,” Yoongi continued. “But what if Y/n sees me as two different people? The Yoongi – her boyfriend – that she knows personally and the… the Suga everyone sees on stage. And the latter is exactly the one she’s trying to run away from, while she’s asking the Yoongi she’s dating for help.”

Namjoon swore he almost got shivers. That tended to happen a lot if he and Yoongi sat down and just talked about whatever – which usually turned into deep philosophical conversations that somehow strengthened their bond, even if they found things they disagreed about – but he was still surprised about how deep Yoongi’s mind really was. He may have put up an almost nihilistic front, but really, Yoongi was open to believe anything if it had enough legitimate proof.

“Maybe that’s the way you think she sees it,” Namjoon chose to say. “This is a dream that you had. It manifested your unconscious mind. Not hers.”

“Yeah,” Yoongi said, various thoughts and further analyses of the dream buzzing in his mind. “Maybe.”

Namjoon was going to say something else but Yoongi’s phone vibrated and the stage manager materialized by their side at the same time, warning them that five minutes were left. Immediately, the staff began to double-check their microphones, fix their hairstyles, and make sure their make-up was still on.

Yoongi – while avoiding the make-up artist’s brush – glanced at his phone.

              YOU [09:54pm]: don’t you have a performance tonight?

Confused, he frowned a little – earning a groan from the make-up artist – and responded.

              YOONGI [09:54pm]: i do, i’m about to go on stage. why?

And just like that, he was worrying again. He seriously had a hard time maintaining his cool attitude that everyone assumed he had at all times because of you. He just needed constant reassurance that everything was okay with you because he couldn’t check for himself and that bothered him. He wanted to be there when you weren’t feeling well. He wanted you to share your worries with each other.

              YOU [09:55pm]: oh. nevermind then, i just thought i heard someone in the house

He could feel his stomach drop as he read this even though the sensible part of his brain told him that it was probably nothing, just like you said. You two had creaky floors in your house that seemed to have their own personality – they just creaked whenever and wherever. It could have also been a gust of wind coming from the open window.

              YOONGI [09:56pm]: close the windows, babe. it’s cold. i’ll be home soon. love you

“Hyung, we’re going,” Namjoon said, nodding his head in the direction of the elevating mechanism that was going to lift them to the stage. Then he stopped, noticing Yoongi’s shaky hands. “Everything alright? What happened?”

“Nothing,” Yoongi chose to say. There was no time to fret over something that could have just been your imagination. He had a performance right now. “Let’s go.”

Yoongi always felt like their performances only lasted for a moment. They just got on stage – the time stopped – and within a blink of an eye, he was already climbing off the stage, sweaty, slightly tired, but incredibly hyped.

Laughing at something Hoseok had just said, Yoongi got his phone out to let you know that he was going to be coming home after the finished the encore stage with the other artists. However, as soon as he unlocked his phone, he saw two missed calls from you and five texts that he hadn’t read. You must’ve been trying to reach him while he was on stage.

The adrenaline in his blood suddenly settled down and Yoongi quickly opened the chat with you to check what had happened.

              YOU [09:57pm]: okay, good luck on stage!

             YOU [10:02pm]: this is weird, i thought i closed the windows before i left but they’re all open. did you open them before leaving?

              YOU [10:06pm]: yoongi? please don’t freak out but i think there’s someone in the house

              YOU [10:08pm]: i called the police

              YOU [10:08pm]: i love you please don’t worry

Feeling his throat close up, Yoongi didn’t understand how he could have not worried. You had just told him there was an intruder in the house and then disappeared. The last text message Yoongi received from you was twelve minutes ago.

Immediately, he shook the white, glittery jacket off his shoulders so he could put his plain jean jacket on.

“Whoa, what’s wrong?” Jin asked, noticing Yoongi’s frantic eyes as he dialed your phone number while attempting to change his stylist-picked stage shoes into his own shoes. “What’s the rush?”

Namjoon overheard this and stood up. “Hyung, what happened?”

“It’s Y/n,” Yoongi said, putting the phone to his ear and feeling the way his heartbeat frequency became five times faster than that of the signal on his phone, while he waited for you to pick up the call.

You didn’t and Yoongi felt all color drain from his face. Something had to happen to you while he was performing.

“Shit, I have to go,” he said, his voice low and tingling with fear.

“What? We have encore stage,” Jin said, glancing at Namjoon who wasn’t doing anything to stop Yoongi from going for the door of their changing room. “Yoongi!”

Namjoon still said nothing – he knew that trying to stop him when he looked like he’s seen a ghost would have been pointless – and Yoongi sprinted out of the changing room, running down the hallway and barely avoiding other idols who were just preparing to go on stage for the two-song encore. Yoongi wasn’t going to be there.

He may have put his work over a lot of things but your life wasn’t one of them. If you had indeed heard someone in the house and Yoongi had played it off by simply telling you to close the windows, he was never going to forgive himself. He needed to get to you. He needed to know what happened.

But hailing a cab in a street filled with people screaming at the sight of him wasn’t just problematic. It was nearly impossible.

He ended up having to wave at the people who saw him and began to take pictures of him – he hated fake-smiling at them but if he didn’t want this to blow up, he had to pretend everything was alright – while attempting to call his manager at the same time.

“Yoongi?” the manager’s confused voice picked up on the second ring. “Why are you calling? What happened?”

“I need someone to drive me to my house,” Yoongi said as quietly as he could, but still loud enough for the manager to hear through the excited screams outside. “My girlfriend said someone broke into the house. She called the police.”

If he had been someone else, there was no way he would have gotten out of that crowd of people by the venue unharmed, and then reached his house in the next ten minutes.

Probably for the first time in his life, Yoongi thanked the God that he was who he was. He had a whole team of people ready to escort him away from the crowd. He had a driver ready to take him home and a police car which joined their van about two blocks away from the venue, so no suspicions would arise.

While waiting for the van to reach his property, Yoongi tried to call you six more times but all calls went to voicemail. Your phone wasn’t turned off – that was promising – but you still weren’t picking up and Yoongi couldn’t calm his rapidly beating heart down.

He jumped out of the van as soon as the driver stopped outside of his house. He couldn’t see very well through the tinted windows inside of the vehicle, but he heard the police sirens. His house was surrounded by them. He couldn’t waste another second.

Running towards the gate, Yoongi called your name, ready to enter his front yard, until a police officer grabbed his arm, stopping him.

“Sir, please, you can’t go inside,” he said, trying to contain a wild Yoongi, who immediately pulled his arm out of the officer’s grip. “There’s an investigation going on.”

“That’s my house,” Yoongi said shakily. “My girlfriend was inside, is she—”

“Two intruders were reported inside of the house,” the officer informed him despite not really having any right to do so. He wasn’t an investigator working on this case, but he knew very well whom the house belonged to. Word traveled fast even between police officers. “They had weapons. The area is on lockdown.”

“Weapons?” Yoongi’s eyes widened. He thought he was truly going to pass out. “My girlfriend was inside!” he repeated. “Did you get her out? Where is she?!”

“Sir, please calm down, we are—”

“Y/n!” Yoongi’s voice cracked as he screamed your name, cutting the officer off and completely disregarding everything he’d just said by pushing the gate open and running towards his house.

“Sir!” the officer chased after him but due to the fact that he hadn’t expected him to run, he ended up hesitating for a good moment and, thus, giving Yoongi a good headstart.

Yoongi stopped right outside of his house, breathing heavily as he took in the number of police officers around him. There were at least three cars parked on his lawn and investigators were talking to each other by his porch. The policemen were walking around, guns at their sides, but Yoongi couldn’t see where you were.

“—no, actually. We think the intruders knew who the owner of the house is,” Yoongi overheard one detective say as he walked past him, looking for you. “They also had to know that he wasn’t going to be home tonight, that’s why they broke into—hey! You can’t be here!”

Yoongi knew the detective was addressing him but, evidently, he hadn’t realized that he was talking to Yoongi, the actual owner of the house they were just talking about. And so, suddenly driven by the new knowledge that these people broke into his house specifically because it was his house, Yoongi ran around the porch, his eyes frantically scanning every person in search of you.

“Y/n!” he called again, not ashamed of the desperation in his voice.

“Sir—”

“My girlfriend was inside of the house!” Yoongi turned around at the voice of a yet another police officer attempting to detain him. He couldn’t believe he was repeating this for the third time. “Did you get her out? Where is she? Are those men still inside?”

“Sir, please, calm down. We will get everyone out of the house safely,” the officer had an unnaturally calm voice when he spoke and it pissed Yoongi off.

But it was his words that almost made Yoongi throw the uniformed-man against the door of his police car and punch him. He had just told Yoongi that you weren’t safe yet.

“Are you saying she’s still in the house?!” Yoongi asked, clenching his fists. “She called you over twenty minutes ago, how could you not have gotten her out by now?! Is she inside of the house with these—the people who broke into it? The ones who have weapons?”

“They—um,” the officer clearly hadn’t expected Yoongi to already know this many details about this and he certainly wasn’t used to civilians talking to him in such a threatening tone. He must have been new. “There are armed men inside, that is true. But our officers have entered the house to escort any hostages out, sir.”

“They will fucking kill her!” Yoongi wasn’t really aware that he was yelling but he had a feeling the ambulance that had just pulled into his front yard might end up having to sedate him nevertheless. He wouldn’t have minded that at all, except he still hadn’t found you and it was this panic specifically that made him aggressive enough to look for you despite being told not to.

Yoongi was moments away from going into the house himself and the policeman probably noticed this because, placing a hand on Yoongi’s shoulder – that Yoongi immediately shrugged off – he tried to explain, “Sir, our officers are professionals. They will—”

“I fucking swear, if anything happens to—”

The door of the house suddenly opened and both Yoongi and the police officer he had been talking to whipped their heads to look. Two officers were helping your shaking body stay up as they walked you out of the door and Yoongi, as soon as he realized that the scared figure between two uniforms was you, immediately dashed in the direction of the front door.

“Y/n!” he wailed, running up the porch stairs and throwing himself at you before any of the officers could protest.

Another few police officers walked out of the door, escorting two handcuffed men to the closest police car. Out of the corner of his eye, Yoongi could see the intruders but he didn’t bother to turn his head to look. He couldn’t have cared less about them in that moment.

He wrapped his arms around you, not giving you a chance to say anything – and certainly not giving the officers nearby a chance to pull him away from you, either – but just listening to your shaky breaths.

“Yoongi…” you whispered then. “W-why are you here? Your performance—”

Yoongi’s heart broke as you mentioned the performance and his grip on you tightened. He couldn’t imagine how you were even able to think about his work when your life had just been in danger.

“Baby, no. I got here as soon as I saw your texts,” he told you. “The performance is over. I’m here with you. I’m so sorry I couldn’t get here earlier.”

He pulled away only to check on your face. The tears had stopped but your eyes were still red and puffy, and Yoongi swore he had already mentally prepared to strangle the two intruders with his own hands had you not spoken.

“You’re here now,” you said, your voice small. “It’s okay now.”

“I am here,” Yoongi nodded, bringing his thumb across your cheek to wipe the remaining tears away. “But it is not okay. They… these people came here because they knew it was my house. T-the weapons they’d supposedly brought… God, I don’t know what they would have done with them. I can’t imagine that. But it’s all my fault.”

“Yoongi,” you said, parting your lips in surprise. “No. It’s not your fault. You couldn’t have known—”

“You told me you heard something,” Yoongi continued. “I should have gotten home as soon as you said that but I didn’t. I ignored that and went on with the performance. Baby, I’m so sorry.”

Hearing his guilty voice and feeling how fast his heart was beating in his chest when he wrapped his arms around you again, you almost broke down in tears. Seeing him in so much pain over this hurt you much more than any of these intruders could have, even if they’d brought weapons.

You never blamed Yoongi for not being here when these men broke into the house, not even once. You were afraid, sure, but you weren’t certain if you were more afraid of what’d happen to you or how it’d affect Yoongi. You knew how anxious he was about the health of your relationship and about you, in general. You strived to give him as few reasons to worry as possible because you knew he’d drop everything and run to you.

Yoongi – despite being a workaholic – always prioritized love and family, even if he didn’t realize that he did. The way he was beating himself up right now was living proof of that.

“I love you,” you said, turning your head so you could gently kiss his cheek as he held you in his arms. “Please don’t blame yourself for this. I’m okay. We’re okay.”

But Yoongi still felt guilty. He could feel your love and forgiveness – even if you insisted there was nothing to forgive – but he couldn’t help himself. There you were, screaming for his help inside of the house, but he was busy being a different person on stage. It was exactly like the dream he had and he shuddered at this realization, clutching your body tighter in his arms.

“I’m not leaving you alone again, baby,” he promised in a whisper. “I love you so much.”

[neilada-d6-meghah]

My opinion on every route for episode 16

As usual Priya’s stuff came a day late, so today I finally found a playthrough. Now prepare for a long post.

In general

I loved this episode, I liked the fact that almost everything was different on every route.

I don’t usually talk against the AP system, but this time I have to say it. Now we don’t waste AP for nothing, but we can’t have a long episode because that would be too expensive, and that’s a problem for Beemoov, but I can’t help to compare the sex scenes of this episode, to sex scenes in Eldarya. It was well written, but it was rushed, because of what I said.

Eldarya has basically the old AP system (you can think about episode 40 in HSL in the old AP system too, if you like), the first time there, when you meet your boyfriend, you have a really long scene with him awesomely described as it should be on their first time. This was the special “first time” in mclul, and the AP system cut it short because otherwise people would complain, and for good reasons. That pisses me off, because I want long episodes, I want informative long scenes, or having long pointless conversations with the crush, but we won’t have it because every single thing we say costs AP.

I did like that they included the condom on the scene, that was the right way to do it, unlike the dam thing. Just make it a part of the normal dynamic, don’t make a class out of it right on the scene, thanks.

Now, my thoughts on every route.

Castiel

I worried at first when he got mad, I didn’t want to feel him as an overprotective boyfriend who feels like he is on his right to treat you badly just because he was worried. I actually took one of the negative answers for him on purpose, because I didn’t want to just go with it when he was talking shit about my hurted friend. But he stopped and properly apologized, at least for my taste, and actually went down to a cuter level of worrisome.

I loved that we are getting close to be the official girlfriend of Crowstorm’s Castiel. I’m a little surprised we’re not everywhere on internet yet, but well, we are being seen by his fans slowly.

I have mixed feelings on the text messages because of the damn translation. In Spanish server he said things that melted me, but they’re not on the English server, so now I’m waiting to see if he said it on French server.

The scene in the Snake Room got me a little awkward at first because I didn’t understand what was the point of it, but once I finished that scene I stop to analyse and I LOVED IT, it was such a sweet thing to do. It was Castiel introducing the love of his life to the other love of his life and I couldn’t think of anything more especial. Castiel opened up entirely this episode, and the talk about Demon was clearly a relationship development sign (remember when we had the chance to ask him about it in episode 5, I think, and the l’o’m dropped down?).

I found funny the freaking out over the lingerie thing because I thought it only happened in Castiel’s route if you were his ex, as a little wink to the pineapple incident (HIMYM flashback) in HSL, but turned out it happens always with everyone.

The date was perfect, he buying everything because he wasn’t sure what did she like (as his ex I felt a little offended, but whatever), his stressfulness, the talk, the hot moment that he stopped was also cute. I like their dynamic when they are together for a long time, and him suggesting that she should stay in his apartment for the entire week was precious. The massage scene is gold, the sex scene was perfect, I loved that he finally said that he wants us to go with him on the tour, but Candy didn’t say a thing about it, and she really should have.

They had sex with the curtains open again, let’s hope there are no pictures this time.

Basically, on this episode I felt comfortable with him, and that’s pretty much all I was asking for this route in UL. I absolutely loved it, and I appreciate that they are making this so romantic now, because at one point it felt emotionless and all I wanted was to leave his route. I understand that he is a wilder, but he had a late entrance, and got together too fast, I wasn’t in love with him at all, that’s why I totally agree with them making his route so… tender? thoughtful? cute? you pick the word, but now they are making me fall in love with this guy, and it worked because I couldn’t be more sure that this is the route I’ll follow. Just give it some time and he’ll be the hottie he has always been again.

Rayan

I ABSOLUTELY LOVED THEIR FIRST MOMENT. It was SO heartbreaking, she just broke down in his arms in front of absolutely everyone, and he couldn’t do anything for her because that hug was already too much for a professor-student relationship. I would’ve like to see what did he came up with in the beginning to go with the group to look for her on the fair, especially because he went back home in episode 15. I picture his worrisome when he decided to go back for her when she disappeared. And it is funny to think that half of the group actually knew what was actually going on before the hug (Chani, Rosa and Leigh knew from us, and Castiel figured it out), and still Chani was shocked too.

It was gold, but then came the meeting in the library. I thought everything was going to be alright when she got there and asked him if she could sit there because it was the only free chair, because from that place they had complete control of who is coming close to them or who could hear them, but they didn’t took any attention to it afterwards, and it got risky because they are so obvious pretty much jumping away from each other every time someone got close and shutting up suddenly.

The visit to the apartment wasn’t that risky at all in comparison. I was a little annoyed by the fact that he didn’t even show her his beautiful apartment before having sex, they went straight to it, but then Irealized it makes sense since they don’t get to touch each other like the other routes, they always have to hold themselves when they’re together, and this was the very first time they could be physically expressive without worrying about anything else.

The sex scene was good, but I felt a little cringy reading it, but it was a personal thing, like I felt I made the right decision when I didn’t change my route when I wanted to. But, I totally approve this episode for his route.

Nathaniel

[x] Good for you, Beemoov, you didn’t rush it, I keep my faith.

It was a really sweet episode with him, it was really sad in the end. I was hoping more blood and drama in the beginning, but it’s fine, we got the drama in the end.

I like that Nathaniel didn’t steal the entire episode for people in other routes. I hope they keep it that way on the other arcs, because right now it feels like Nath is the purest love in the entire game, and I’m ok with it, because is his arc, and I hope they make me feel the same when we face Castiel’s.

The sex scene felt a little out of place, especially for someone with stitches, and because he was in pain with just a hug. I don’t know, I don’t understand how can you get in the mood for it in that situation, but for the dramatic touch, it was ok.

I know I’m not saying too much about him right now, but I feel like everyone already said all the good words for it.

I liked the fact that he cleaned up his room this time, and him living Candy his apartment and credit card was such a pure thing for me, I can’t even-

Hyun

He was cute as usual. I laughed SO HARD at the little “cheating” text message-drama, because if there is anyone I wouldn’t EVER buy it, it’s him, it was hilarious.

I like how they are all confident to let his sisters get to know Candy.

The Toy Story thing was awesome, although I didn’t quite get if it was a joke from Morgan and Alexy or an actual mistake, since he mentioned that they were also going to see a movie, but I doubt it, I think it was just another mistranslate.

On the sex scene I definitely got surprised when he went wild on the table, I was expecting him to be more shy, but he wasn’t. On everything else… he was just cute, that’s it for him.

Priya

Now things with her are getting cuter too, but sadly, it’s still behind all the other routes.

I liked the fact that she didn’t agree with Castiel and actually tried to understand Candy’s decisions (I hope it wasn’t just to disagree with Castiel, it annoyed me that she is still not over his proposition in episode 11)

I hope she keeps calling Candy Pumpkin. I’m happy that she can take the exam, if I were her I would’ve been crying for those two whole days, she is awesome for that. I liked the fact that she was the only one to notice the necklace.

About the date, I loved her room, I loved that she put on her pajamas, that was a cute detail too, like a different kind of intimacy. When she falls asleep was a real plot twist, it would’ve been so funny if the episode ended there, and next episode started with the conclusion of the date.

About the illus

Rayan looks gorgeous and passionate, I love how his hair looks, but he looks a little too alive, I remembered him more grey than that, but I’m fine with it. Candy, on the other hand, looks awful, her face is drawn weird, she has one giant boob, and a nonexistent one. Well, that or she totally broke her shoulder. I’m getting a little annoyed by the way they shadow the muscles lately, makes it all confusing and unrealistic in my opinion.

Nathaniel’s illu is probably the best one, but I think Candy is a little too high up, and it’s weird not to see her nipple there since we’re seeing almost the entire boob. Now, my real problem with it is that they decided to make a sexual illu on every route, but on this one, it wasn’t the more important moment at all. I totally would’ve preferred a picture of them crying together, or Candy alone when she woke up, that would’ve been heartbreaking. Yes, some people could disagree with me, because it can be ‘unfair’ but nothing stops them from having a sexual illu on further episodes.

Castiel’s face looks weird, although every time I see it, it gets better. Is cute to see him blushing, but his body looks weird, especially in the shadows on his torso, and the perspective on his legs. Candy looks gorgeous, I think this one has been her best illu so far, I don’t quite get why people say she’s looking at us, but I can’t deny she has too many toes, lmao. This illus is the cutest one, the way Candy is looking at Castiel is so loving, and him looking straight to her face while blushing is so romantic. This one is my favorite.

Hyun got the worst one. He looks weird, the position is weird, Candy looks weird. I think they should’ve gone for something more classic here. Although his left hand is getting brave.

Priya is a goddess, she is so pretty. The only thing that annoys me is how dark it looks for a morning, and Candy’s back is broken as everyone had mentioned.