#soc textpost

[its-shakespeare-bitch]

[inejs-knife]

[hauntedbythenarrative]

Kaz Brekker + textpost

[shit-im-bi]

THIS IS SUCH WYLAN ENERGY IM CACKLING

- Jack Wolfe, A Storm of Crows and Shadows

[19burstraat]

anyone want to hear my six of crows x jane austen's emma au. yes of course you do don't be silly. the only person allowed to be silly is me as I descend into madness in the course of trying to cast this. (if you think 'I've heard this before' yes I've posted abt it before tho I think it was on my main)

kaz is emma, a bored, overintelligent rich bitch stuck in a country house with a bunch of shit idiot neighbours and almost no one to entertain or match him. fucking useless dad per haskell / mr woodhouse is a weaksauce hypochrondriac, and jordie / isabella has gone and got married and ditched kaz, the bastard. the only consolation is their neighbour inej / mr knightley, who is rich, sensible, popular, and elegible as hell... glory be, an intellectual equal for kaz!

in order to be less bored, kaz takes on a protege, mysterious randomer and natural son wylan / harriet smith, who kaz decides to mould in his own image and make a good match for. wylan is in love with gentleman farmer jesper / robert martin, but kaz is a snob and tries to push him towards local vicar kuwei / mr elton (I KNOW. I'M SORRY KUWEI), but that all goes tits up bc turns out kaz is a fucking terrible matchmaker, who'd've known.

meanwhile, unassuming and a little cold, but locally well-liked matthias / jane fairfax has arrived back in the village, and kaz busily commences hating on him because he's another accomplished young man and he makes him feel inadequate. hot on his heels comes the mysterious nina / frank churchill (NINA I'M SO SORRY I FUCKING HATE FRANK BUT THIS IS WHAT WORKS FOR THE COUPLES YOU CAN BE A NICE FRANK CHURCHILL ): ), who kaz is kind of fascinated by and enjoys sparring with, and hence kind of misses the really obvious signs that nina and matthias are secretly engaged, even though inej, ever thief of secrets, has lowkey noticed something's up, like matthias getting mysterious gifts from someone. kaz ends up being convinced that possibly it's inej that's pursuing matthias, which nina encourages because it helps her cover, and kaz kinda panics.

everyone has petty village drama which culiminates when kaz sneers at pekka rollins / miss bates (LISTEN. LI actually you don't need to listen bc I laughed out loud when I thought of this comparison but hear me out, if you just think of it as the equivalent of the church of barter scene except instead of 'I buried him' it's 'when have you ever stopped at three?' it kind of works. sorry to miss bates tho who is still kinda my fave austen character) at box hill, which culminates in inej going BOY WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM and kaz is like wow she kind of has a point should I be a better person :/

uhh what else even happens. there's a ball after nina massively encourages one, inej saves wylan from being partnerless and later dances with kaz (think of the gloveless dance scene from the 2020 adaptation? yeah? yeahh??). the regency gender conventions here are getting so messed up lmao, never mind. in emma harriet fancies herself in love with mr knightley and emma is forced to realise that she likes him, so let's say that wylan pretends to be after inej, in order to strong arm kaz into realising that he's wanted to marry inej this entire time. wylan's dad turns out to be minted (I'm stretching the book here to make it work w SOC but never mind) but that's after kaz has admitted he fucked up and sent wylan off to marry gentleman farmer jesper, yaaay. nina's relatives who are stopping her from marrying matthias die and hence there's a massive revelation with 'oh they were engaged this whole time lol', kaz is PISSED bc he didn't clock it. uh. everyone gets married and now kaz can escape the shit village and actually go places. the end.

[whitevesper]

hedcanon that kaz was a secret heartrender.

pluses:

- he could easily hear when inej was coming (maybe he heard not steps but heartbeat);

- he could tell what people feel and manipulate them;

- he survived after firepox (somehow healed himself, no?);

- he controlled his own emotions perfectly;

- he could play cards and, not including that he had a perfect memory (like nina — also a heartrender!), he could understand peoples’ emotions;

- he he agreed to the kidnapping of bo yul bayur who invented jurda parem (that threatened grishas’ existence). yeah, we all know that “this is not about the money, kaz” but what if they were right all this time? and money is just bonus;

- when crows got to the ice court, kaz knew how to hide nina’s and jesper’s “talents”, but how? yes. bc he was a grisha too.

minuses:

- ????

- i’m still trying to think about them, but… no. my mind is clear.

[emtheoddball]

"If I die, remember that you're the ones that made me come here."

-Wylan Van Eck, during the ice court mission, probably

[five-of-cr]

here's the thing about matthias: he isn't the honorable, reformed hero some of the fandom seems to see him as.

yes, he was raised by a tight-knit family of comrade soldiers and decides to betray them in the end. of course that took incredible strength. i don't deny that. but we also need to recognize that the drüskelle are not just some rogue cult. they are a core part of the fjerdan government, who is trying to wipe out the grisha because they are seen as dangerous. that's literally just genocide. however indoctrinated someone is, this is something that is evil from every angle, even if the character can't or won't see it.

and look, i love a good redemption arc, but matthias is such a passive actor in his. he falls in love with nina against his will. she changes his attitudes toward grisha because she's beautiful and kind so all grisha can't be bad, right? this a classic example of the trope of separating the "good ones" from the rest, where you cherry-pick specific individuals to point to as exceptions to a group's nature, which is still implied to be evil. you have to do a lot more than fall in love to truly unearth and address the roots of bigotry.

tbh, this is my biggest critique of the books as a whole. i loathe the "love conquers all" trope that pairs together a character from the oppressed group and one from the oppressors, letting the one show the other through the power of love that being bigoted is not nice. it puts all the responsibility on the former to prove their humanity, and gives all the credit to the latter's ability to be persuaded to recognize it. and then it inevitably leads to forgiveness, because the character has "earned" it by changing their views, once again making the victim seem like the villain if they don't absolve the oppressor of their past "mistakes". also, it's incredibly unrealistic for someone to fall in love with a person who actively hates them and considers them sub-human. in real life, people have to work on their bigotry before that happens, not use the relationship as a plot device for character development.

i think the idea of writing a character like matthias is neat. i think portraying someone's struggle to throw off the suffocating, hateful dogma they've been fed all their life is a story we need more of. i think personal growth of this variety should be celebrated, because otherwise people would never change. but i don't think the people, fictional or real, get to do this without facing profound consequences. it is not enough to feel sorry. it is not enough to apologize. it is definitely not enough to fall in love. and i think writing that lets people off the hook like this grossly oversimplifies power and oppression, and ends up being a feel-good way to romanticize people who cause a lot of harm.

a last note: my opinion is 100% influenced by my being bipoc. matthias is a classic aryan supremacist, even if being aryan isn't the thing he's being supremacist about. my gut reaction to that type of character is always going to be mistrust, both because people in real life have given me reason to be mistrustful and because characters like these are often written in a way that makes you sympathize with oppressors. i don't think matthias earns that trust, and i don't see why i owe him my affection as a reader.

[thstarsofsilver]

i'm reading crooked kingdom and kaz brekker is genuinely a comedy king

"i suspect you and your fjerdan might want something more to subsist on than patriotism and longing glances"

[about a literal child] "it was that or snap her neck and make it look like she fell down the stairs, wylan. i think i showed remarkable restraint. move."

HUMOUR

[daughterofathenacarli]

netflix posting “six of bros” like no you don’t understand. their amazing (practically sacred) relationship is something you just don’t get. you don’t get to call kaz with the girl he loves so much through a pure emotional, non physical bond, whose laugh he would bottle up and get drunk on if he could and with the guy he considers a brother even after everything he went through with jordie. you don’t get to call them bros. 

[its-shakespeare-bitch]

hi, found family trope has cured me.

[inejs-knife]

CROOKED KINGDOM SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

[unkindledliege]

Started my first DS3 playthrough on June 22nd

Here's a summary in 3 pics

[shit-im-bi]

Lil crow hc I've had in mind for a while

Kaz, pointing at his broken cane: So.

Kaz: who broke it?

the rest of the crows: *absolute and utter silence*

Kaz: I'm not mad, I just want to know

Inej, immediately: I did it. I broke i-

Kaz: No. No, you didnt.

Kaz: Jesper?

Jesper: Don't look at me, look at Matthias

Matthias: WHAT

Matthias: I didn't break it

Jesper: huh, that's weird... how'd you even know it was broken then, huh?

Matthias: because it's sitting right in front of us AND THE DEMJIN SAID IT'S BROKEN

Jesper: suspicious.

Matthias: the only thing suspicious is why Kaz is actually asking us instead of manipulating us into confessing.

The Crows: *absolutely silent*

Kuwei, piping up from literally nowhere: If- if it matters, probably not but um, Wylan was the last one to touch it.

Wylan: liar. I don't touch Kaz's things, I dont have a fucking death wish.

Kuwei: oh really? Then what were you doing by his room earlier?

Wylan: I was practicing self defence with Jes's guns and KAZ IS THE ONLY ONE PARANOID ENOUGH TO HAVE A BULLETPROOF ROOM.

Jesper: to be fair, Wy has terrible aim, he needs the bulletproof room.

Wylan: YEAH, everyone knows that, Kuwei.

Inej: alright alright, let's not fight, I broke it, so I'll pay for it, Kaz.

Kaz:

Kaz: no.

Kaz: who broke it?

Jesper, lowering his voice: Kaz

Jesper: Nina has been awfully quiet

Nina: oh wow, REALLY JES

Jesper: yeah really

Nina: I thought we were fucking friends, Jes.

*cue the commotion as Matthias very loudly takes Nina's side and Wylan takes Jesper's side*

*everyone starts arguing*

Kaz: I broke it.

Kaz: A splinter from the wood poked my hand so I broke it over my knee and didn't regret a second.

Kaz: but I predict that 10 minutes from now they'll be at each others throats with war paint on their faces and a pig head on a stick.

Kaz: I'm bored and I need entertainment.

[malconnorsupremacy]

masterlist

here's the masterlist where there's (mostly) all of my posts- headcanons, fics, textposts, etc.

here we go!

PJO

Malconnor headcanons

all pjo nonsense, including textposts (keep in mind i was immature and very 16 for most of these)

fics:

malconnor:

we're happy, free, confused and lonely in the best way (250 words, T)

Malcolm has a hard time getting his eyes off a certain son of Hermes.

percabeth:

golden like daylight (378 words, T)

Percy has a nightmare.

Six of Crows

Kanej x Massages

Kanej x hair worship

other soc nonsense (no textposts lol)

kanej fics:

our secret moments in a crowded room (1.5k words, M)

Kaz and Inej, at a party.

love is a ruthless game (unless you play it good and right) (multichapter, M)

Inej is kidnapped, and it doesn't help when the abductor is the man she walked away from a year ago.

dancing with our hands tied (AU, multichapter, M)

Inej is presented with a golden opportunity to make a name for herself as Kerch's first Suli to get a Bharatnatyam Arangetram, a ceremony she had always desired, when Dirtyhands gets her out of Heleen's institute.

But she does not see the consequences of being associated with the most dangerous man in the Barrel coming.

this love left a permenant mark (multichapter, each chp less than 500 words, M)

Inej, as she learns that marking and being marked does not mean losing one's identity.

[whitevesper]

when you kiss wylan and tease kuwei but suddenly something gets wrong: