#some day.... some day we are going to hear matt ask robbie to come to the table again

[septembermonologues]

it brings me peace to know that we dorym dorian girlies (yes that includes liam) have sam and travis in our corner

[aspiringsophrosyne]

Episode 5: Pass Through Fire

Is it hot in here? It seems hot in this theatre. Maybe their air conditioning's on the fritz. Better get yourself a drink, because it seems like the temperature's going up and staying up.

The Good.

Janet Varney. Of course they got Korra to voice Keyleth's mom. Of course they did. This whole opening sequence screams Avatar, and I'm here for it. And it's nice to see such tenderness between Keyleth and her mom, given their separation. Also, just seeing Good Parents in TLOVM is a joy, given the majority of the group comes from less-than-ideal families or home situations.

Raven Queen's not the most tactful conversationalist, is she? I like that this is something that just won't let Vax go until he deals with it; it might be easy for him and the audience to think it'll go away without those little flashes. Similarly, it fits that he cannot get the armor off; there's no escaping it or what it represents. 

Yay, Vex and Scanlan banter. I love what the runes say if you look close enough. Nice nod to Viridian, too. I'm happy to see more between these two in particular. Laura has talked about how they both put up fronts and that this was something Vex recognized in Scanlan and related to. They have their own interesting dynamic it's good to see more of.

I like that the show portrays Keyleth and Vax's concerns as equally valid. They are trying to fight something that could affect everyone in Tal'Dorei and perhaps even the world, but Vox Machina had previously backed each other up in their personal quests.

Very cool getting to see Keyleth just beat on something. Her magic is always a treat for the oculars, but there's something fun about watching her hit a monster in the face.

Yes...! Flashback to Allura and Kima's adventuring days!! I would watch an episode focusing on that group. It's also nice to see it so quickly and casually established that the two are a couple. In the original, they had been together before the stream, then split off to do their own things. Matt left it up in the air whether they would get back together or not. They eventually did, but that left us with hours and hours of ambiguity until it became clear that Allura and Kima were very much in love.

Hey, Robbie! Robbie Daymond was a player on Exandria Unlimited and a guest player for Campaign 3 of Critical Role. He's fabulous, and I didn't even realize that was him playing Cerkonos.

Keyleth's whole transformation scene is beautiful and cathartic. She spends so much time unsure of herself or struggling to control her abilities, but then she gets that extra bit of confidence to let loose, and it's awe-inspiring. Her surrendering to the fire has a certain painful, uncertain beauty. You don't know if she'll be able to do whatever she needs to without hurting or destroying herself.

Neal's score compliments the moment perfectly; it's a musical epiphany spliced with the triumph of a battle won. There isn't anything more I can say about the music without repeating myself; it's always amazing.

Keyleth gets a little costume upgrade, yay! I like that the characters' looks change to represent their development and growing power. We saw something similar with the character art starting in C2, and it was always fun to see the new looks.

The Bad. (Or at least, not great.)

Grog and Craven Edge

So here's the thing about the original shitting scene. And yes, that is a sentence I just typed.

Originally the second Sphinx was not on the same continent as Vasselheim, and the crew went back to Tal'dorei to meet with Osysa's mate, to get the Vestige and some other treasures Identified, and to rest for a bit. Whitestone, in particular, was where the scene with Grog and Scanlan happened. Even if you didn't see the original, you might be able to guess it was transplanted from a more populated setting because Grog asks Scanlan for a song so that no one else will hear.

When they're in the woods. Away from the group and far away from any other people.

Grog's dumb, but he's not that kind of dumb.

It's not a huge deal, but it's one more instance on a growing list of the writing CRew's inconsistencies.

To fix it, I'd change the line to something different (Grog asking for mood music instead, perhaps) or, hell, have it chronologically take place in Whitestone when they first escaped the Conclave. Just have Grog flashback to it in this episode. You'd have to change some things in a few episodes, though. Have Grog fight some residual undead or monsters hanging around the city so he can see what the sword is capable of first, for instance. But you could make it work. 

Nitpicks:

I need more damn banter.

Not just because we had more banter in the original stream and not just because it would be a great way to organically world-build and establish and develop these characters and their relationships...

But because none of these people have books, iPhones, or music to listen to while they travel, presumably for hours if not days. All they can do is talk. So it makes sense that they would.

There's another reason, but I'll get into that next episode.

~ * ~

Again, I wished they'd added some visual effect to indicate Allura was at least trying to cast a spell when those rocks fell. If you know the original story, you know she lives, and if you know D&D wizards, you know they have tricks for that kind of thing, but if you're new, it can look cheap that they got out without any previous indication that they had.

Aramenté

So...to pass through the fire.

For various reasons, the way this moment was presented in the Campaign can't happen here. And even if there was no getting around that, it breaks my heart that the way it went down, so much of the original meaning of this phrase was lost.

The long and short of it was that it was part of a pep-talk for Keyleth that was a metaphor for enduring adversity. And it's such a disservice to Kiki's anxiety and her struggles with her confidence to just have her suddenly understand the concept out of nowhere when we have everything we need to give it more weight.

We have the whole prior season.

Instead of Keyleth just suddenly realizing what she needs to do, what she's capable of doing, have her flashback to the Blue Dragon she helped kill. The badass magic she used on the road to Whitestone that saved Vox Machina's lives while they were chasing after Scanlan. When she healed Cassandra. Her ice magic against the zombie hoard. When she killed Sylas. Hell, you could throw in her escaping the Conclave, which was her almost literally passing through fire.

Then hit us with her mom's voice. Because then both she and the audience can connect her mother's phrase with all she's endured up to this point. Hammer home what it means.

And then it's clear that Keyleth's already done what Air Ashari are made to do. So she can do it now.

Pyrah And Future Conflicts

Keyleth is told that Thordak had help getting out of the Fire Elemental plane, which led to the death and destruction that's come to Pyrah. In the stream, the confrontation between Keyleth and the being that provided that help was electric, charged with her anger and outrage in a moment where all her lack of surety fell away and was the foundation for some incredible moments later. There could still be more coming to set up for it....but as it stands, I can't see this episode providing the same heft that its stream counterpart did.

Mainly because, in the stream, we got to visit Pyrah before the attack. We saw it thriving, calm and peaceful. After the Chroma Conclave's initial attack, Allura showed Vox Machina the devastation the dragons had wrought outside Emon. Pyrah had become the sight of a smoking crater and mounds of dead. It left Keyleth and Marisha both in tears.

We're not getting the same impact here, but maybe we could've gotten closer to it by having Keyleth's flashback with her mom occur in Pyrah. We could see how the city was meant to be, and then we could've further empathized with Keyleth when she gets there and sees how devastated it is.

Heading into the next show, we've got one hell of a performance coming up. Don't miss it!

[crazedlunatic]

Matt & Adrian’s First Date

“I honestly didn’t think you were going to show up. That’s why I suggested the beach… since, you know, you spent two months cancelling within two hours of the date.”

Adrian sat down on the ground in front of him, looking apologetic but not actually apologizing. “I didn’t even know there were beaches here.”

“How did you not know there were beaches here?” Cookie Guy, or Matt, looked at him like he was crazy. “There’s seven… although, honestly I would only consider three of them real beaches myself. Massachusetts has a weird definition of beach.”

“I probably did not know because I’m not from here and spend 90% of my life at work or school.” Adrian shrugged.

“So, you don’t live here live here?”

“I’ve been here about a year and a half. I go to Harvard.”

“You were giving me a hard time about my age and you’re still in undergrad?” Matt looked amused.

“No. Harvard Law.”

“Oh. Wow.” Matt’s eyes widened. “Okay then.”

“Yep. A pretty guy who is smart too. Love the trope.” Adrian sighed.

“School isn’t really my thing.” Matt said. “But good for you.”

“What is your thing?”

“Apparently playing date tag with a stranger who stole my cookie.” Matt shrugged.

Those freaking blue eyes.

“Yeah. Sorry.”

“There is no way you had things come up for two straight months, by the way. So why did you even come?”

Adrian narrowed his yes.

“I mean… I even had to get two shifts covered only for you to cancel… that meant I had to work St. Patrick’s Day and I really wanted to get drunk, so…” Matt said. “It’s literally the first actual holiday I’ve had off in three years… well, would have been.”

“Your job sounds like it sucks.”

“It pays well.” Matt shrugged.

“Are you even old enough to legally drink?” Adrian asked him.

“Do you think you’re better than everyone else or just me?” Matt titled his head.

“Wh—”

“You aren’t very nice. I thought the whole cookie thing may have been a fluke because we all have bad days… but you don’t seem that much better today.”

“Are you even old enough to date somebody out of undergrad?”

“Okay.” Matt stood. “Have a good day, Adrian. Watch out for sharks. Probably aren’t any at this beach but they saw three yesterday in Cape Cod.”

“I’m sorry. Don’t go.” Adrian looked at him.

“Why did you keep rescheduling for two months to sit here and do this? Do you think because you go to Harvard Law and you’ve got a nice face, that you can treat people however you want?”

“Because I don’t do this very well.” Adrian said. “I’m sorry.”

“Well with that attitude, I’m not surprised.” Matt sat back down. “Where are you from?”

“Colorado.”

“Denver?”

“No.”

“Aspen?”

“No.” Adrian scrunched his nose up. “Boulder.”

“What is even there? Nobody can ever tell me.”

“A lot of mountains, a lot of parks, a lot of trails, and a lot of skiing… among other things.” Adrian said. “Where are you from?”

“Here.” Matt shrugged. “But you already know what’s here.”

“Yeah, some of it.” Adrian laughed a little bit. “Honestly the only time I really get to see any of it is on winter and summer break.”

“You don’t go home?”

“I went back when my grandmother died two months ago but that was it… and I basically left after the funeral.” Adrian looked thoughtful.

“Oh my God. Is that why you cancelled?”

“Just the second time.” Adrian looked around. It wasn’t a typical beach… but it was still very nice… and very Cambridge.

“I’m sorry to hear that. Where do you work?”

“CMJ.”

“Oh God.” Matt groaned.

“What?” Adrian asked, somewhat dismissively.

“Oh, it’s great. My dad is really close friends with one of the owners, though, and he gives me a hard time.” Matt laughed.

“… Which one? Jeff?”

“That guy is an idiot. No. Bob. Er, Robert? I don’t know what people call him at work. My dad just calls him Robbie but it feels weird to call him that.”

“Your poor dad.” Adrian said.

“No. Bob’s great.” Matt shook his head. “He’s a really good person. He can be a bit of a dick, though. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to go to CMJ to…”

“To what?”

“Give him stuff for my dad.”

It was kind of true.

If by stuff you meant following him home after bad trials and keeping him from getting beat up in the office when giving criminals bad news.

Technicalities.

“What does your dad do? Is he in law?”

“No. He’s the Chief of Police. When I have nothing to do, he sends me on errands… I mean, he could just make Pete do it but I’m the youngest and we always get the short end of the stick… even though I am taller by half an inch. Which I remind him daily.”

“I’m the oldest sibling.”

“Yeah, I can totally see that.” Matt nodded.

“What is that supposed to mean?” Adrian laughed, not sure whether he should be offended.

“The oldest sibling always thinks he’s better than everyone else.”

Adrian opened his mouth and then closed it.

“You didn’t even disagree. Oh my God.” Matt rolled his eyes but he was smiling. “How many siblings do you have?”

“Four. Including a twin.”

“Oh God. Do I have to worry about you switching up on me?”

“Well that would be a silly thing to worry about because she is a girl, so no worries there. My youngest brother does look a lot like me when I was his age, though.”

“I am the youngest of four… and all of us are boys.”

“Your poor mother.”

“Everyone always says that. I mean, we were all pretty good, though.”

“Well you had a police officer for a dad.” Adrian pointed out.

“Same as any other dad. We just saw him a lot less on holidays.” Matt shrugged. “Plus, I basically put them through hell from fifteen to eighteen so I was the only trouble child… My mom used to call me ‘Trouble.’”

“What, was that last year?” Adrian teased, but this time Matt could tell he wasn’t doing it to be rude.

“Ha. No. And quit fishing. I’m not telling you.”

“I’m 23. I’m not going to be very happy if you are still a teenager or only 20.”

“I am not 20.”

“21?”

Matt shrugged.

“22?”

Matt shrugged again.

“There is no way you are older than 23.”

“I dunno.” Matt singsonged.

“If I was this anxious about a date with a 20 year old, I am going to be so pissed.”

“Let’s go do something.” Matt hopped up and held out his hand to help Adrian up.

As soon as Adrian was standing, a kid came and tackled Matt, arms going around his legs.

“THANK YOU MATTTTT!”

Adrian looked around, very confused, as a woman rushed up after the small girl.

“Mommy, it’s Matt and he saved my cat. Matt Cat. Cat Matt.”

“Sweetie, please have boundaries and he’s not even working.” The woman said.

“Nuh uh, Mommy. They’re always working. It’s in the rule book.”

“That rule book actually doesn’t exist. I was joking.” Matt said as the little girl let him go.

“At any rate, thank you again for saving her cat.” The girl’s mom said.

“Who doesn’t want to climb a million foot tree in the rain to save a cat?” Matt shrugged.

“You’re the best.” The girl looked at Matt like he’d hung the moon… and also kind of like a child-stalker.

“Okay. Tell him thank you one more time and then we have to leave because he’s on a date.”

“But they’re both boys, Mommy.”

“Well sometimes boys like boys.” The woman said. “Tell him bye.”

“Bye, Matt! Have fun kissing!”

The woman mouthed ‘I’m so sorry’ before going after her daughter, who had run off.

“What was that about?” Adrian asked. “Random girls call you when their cat is stuck in a tree?”

“I mean… not usually. My assumption is the firemen were elsewhere?” Matt shrugged. “Honestly, though, I’m pretty sure she’s in love with me. Any time she sees me she does the same thing—makes some excuse to run over and hug me… but her Mom is close friends with one of my brothers so it’s kind of hard to say, ‘I’m tired, sorry.’”

“How many girls have crushes on you?”

“What age range are we talking?” Matt asked.

“How many age ranges have crushes on you?”

“Well, you’ve got your toddler range, your kid range, your preteen range, your—”

“Okay, okay. You’re cute and likable. I get it.” Adrian laughed. “What are we going to do?”

“Are you hungry?” Matt asked.

“Not yet.” Adrian shook his head.

“Have you been to the Museum of Bad Art? It’s in the Somerville Theater.”

“How far away is Somerville?”

“You really haven’t been around much, have you?” Matt stopped outside of a very sporty Honda Civic.

“Oh God. Is this yours?”

“Yes. It is. I was too lazy to fill up my work car. I’m actually very selective about when I drive it.”

“Well, it’s very nice… how far away are we going, though? You’re not going to kidnap me, are you?” Adrian was mostly joking but gave Matt a look.

“It’s less than ten minutes away.”

“Okay.” Adrian got into the car.

Honestly, if people were coming up and thanking him for saving cats, he must not have been that creepy.

…

“That was ridiculous. I mean, I hadn’t been before either. But wow.”

“I don’t know. I was kind of partial to the ferret in a brothel one.”

“Not the creepy cat that looks like it was about to recite the Pledge of Allegiance? That or go off to war?” Matt looked at him. “Or that torso phone? I couldn’t tell if it was supposed to be being murdered or having an orgasm.”

“Yeah, that was creepier than the cat. I liked the sign that said the gallery was protected by fake security cameras.”

“Like 60% of all security cameras are fake.”

“How do you know that?” Adrian asked.

“Because companies are cheap as all get out.” Matt shrugged. “So… are you hungry yet?”

“Not really.”

“Fine. Can I just kiss you now then?”

“What?” Adrian looked at him, shocked.

“Well usually you wait until the end of the date but I’ve pretty much been thinking about it since the first time I saw you and—”

Adrian stepped up, kissing him mid-sentence.

“Oh. Okay. That was unexpected.”

Adrian smiled brightly.

“What if we just… go to my house and do that some more until you’re hungry?”  Matt asked.

“Okay.” Adrian got into the passenger seat of his car.

Sure, he’d literally had sex with one of his classmates two nights before. It wasn’t serious, though… Actually, Adrian was never very serious.

Although this did feel… different.

“To be honest, I haven’t been there in two and a half days and I had barely any sleep before I left so I’m not sure if it’s clean or not but…”

“I don’t plan to be looking at your tables or floors, Matt.”

…

Adrian woke up the next morning, comfortable and warm but having no idea where he was.

Neighborhood, anything.

He could remember making out with Matt, things getting heated, and then zip. Nada. Nothing.

He was still dressed, though, so that was good.

He stood and left Matt’s bedroom, walking into the living room. Matt was sitting in his pajamas and talking on his phone.

“I mean, I’m already pulling 64 hours next week and after tonight, I’ll be at 58 for this week… Theoretically, yeah, but nobody wants to do that… Logan, seriously, if you don’t give me my birthday and Christmas off, I am going to make your life a living hell until one of us dies—probably you because you’re older… Yeah, love you too asshole. Seriously. Birthday. And. Christmas. Fine. Bye.”

“That sounds like a very crazy work schedule.” Adrian said, coming over.

Matt didn’t even jump. He just shrugged when Adrian sat down next to him.

“You knew I was back there, didn’t you?”

Matt nodded.

“I fell asleep, didn’t I?”

“Yeah.” Matt nodded again.

“We didn’t have sex right?”

“Nope.” Matt shook his head.

Adrian nodded his head once, looking at Matt. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay. A first date doesn’t have to end with sex.” Matt shrugged. “You must have been tired. You were just out. I was almost worried you’d passed out from lack of oxygen.”

“Oh God.” Adrian’s eyes widened in horror.

“I’m kidding. You fell asleep when I went to use the bathroom.” Matt smiled.

“Your pillow was comfortable.”

“Yeah. I’m kind of partial to it.” Matt’s smile grew and he looked into Adrian’s eyes.

“I… uhm…” Adrian bit his lip and looked at him. “I really enjoyed yesterday with you.”

“I had fun too.” Matt smiled again.

Adrian leaned forward, his hand resting on Matt’s thigh.

“Before we do… this.” Matt sat up. “I have to admit something. I was just not going to tell you, but…I probably should.”

“If you tell me you’re straight and married with children, I might kill you.” Adrian said.

“We, uhm… met before.”

“At the coffee shop. I know. You gave me the cookie.”

“Well I almost gave you something earlier that day too.”

“What?” Adrian looked confused. “Is that an inuendo?”

“No!” Matt said quickly. “I almost gave you a ticket.”

“You wha— Oh my God. I knew I know you from somewhere!”

“Yeah. I should have told you at the coffee shop but… I didn’t want you to just turn me down again.” Matt admitted. “And then I was going to just not tell you at all but… I had a lot of fun with you yesterday and if this goes somewhere, I didn’t want us to start out with a lie.”

“They were on lunch by the way.”

“I know. Ugh, they always are from 1 to 2… but people have died going 20 miles over the speed limit several times, so…”

Adrian leaned forward and kissed him. He then pulled away quickly. “Hey! You gave me a hard time but you parked illegally outside of the coffee shop!”

“I know, I know. I didn’t know the line would be so long and honestly, they never care when I do it. Actually, it makes their shop look safer. It’s not in the best part of town.” Matt shrugged.

“You’re a cop.”

“Police officer.”

“You’re a police officer.” Adrian repeated.

“I promise I’m not a buzzkill at parties… I am, however, the one that barely drinks so I can make sure everyone gets home safe.” Matt said. “Even if you don’t see it, I will always have a gun. And I’ll always walk in before you because it’s what I do with my team out there and it’s kind of habit. I will hold it open for you still, though. I probably just won’t be looking at you while I do it… and I’ll always want to sit facing the entrance because I like to know who and what’s around me.”

Surely he’s not super young if he’s got his own team and goes in first… He must be good.

“I might be able to handle that.” Adrian gave him a small smile. “Are there perks?”

“Donuts.” Matt grinned. “Seriously. I’m not even joking… although I’ll eat any pastry. That and girl scout cookies will shut the office down.”

“What is the best part?” Adrian asked.

“The kids. My partner and I always stop at the lemonade stands and when it’s slow, we’ll play ball with kids in the neighborhood… also, when it’s slow when we work in the winter we sled with them.”

He is just too freaking adorable, Adrian thought.

“Worst part?”

“There’s a few worst parts.” Matt admitted. “Like being the first one to an accident and having to hold someone as they’re dying… coming up on an accident from speeding and seeing mangled bodies of people who didn’t have on seatbelts—especially kids. And… having to kill people.”

“You’ve had to kill people?”

“Twice. It really sucks knowing that you’ve ended a life even if it was to save someone else.”

Adrian nodded, frowning.

“The pros definitely outweigh the cons. All the emergency services are like your second family. Well, I guess I have actual real family in the police station too… And Shop with A Cop at Christmas is the best although I usually end up spending my own money too, not just what we’ve raised…I mean, basically anything with kids and I’m down. They’re so funny.”

“You don’t have a handcuff kink, right?”

“Oh God, no. Besides, handcuffs are disgusting. Everything from cocaine to feces on them. Anyone who would willingly put those on is crazy.” Matt shuddered. “Plus, I’m pretty vanilla. Very vanilla actually.”

“Are you going to tell me how old you are yet?” Adrian asked.

“Eventually I will.” Matt nodded.  “But not yet.”

“But you are 21 or over?”

“Yep!” Matt said cheerfully. “So… you’re taking me out on the next date, right?”

“Yes… but only if you come back to bed with me now.”

“Don’t have to say that twice.” Matt hopped up.

“Hey… where’s your gun now?” Adrian asked, crawling onto the bed.

“Safe where nobody can get to it. Literally. In a safe.” Matt crawled on top of his, unbuttoning your shirt. “You’ll definitely be doing a walk of shame back into your apartment tonight. Sorry.”

“I have a feeling it will be worth it.” Adrian pulled Matt down on top of him.

[sibsteria]

cheatercheater [rob benedict] [part 2]

prompts: ''I don't love you anymore'', ''look what you do to me'', ''let's just stay in bed'', ''it was you the whole time''

summary: a year after [part 1] took place, about 6 months after you and Jensen broke up the fans found out about his cheating. Most of the fans supported you, some of them remained blinded by the media 'he wouldn't do that' or 'it's not like Jensen' but a full year after the incident, you and Rob were happy

characters: Rob Benedict, Jensen Ackles, Richard Speight Jr, Matt Cohen, Misha Collins, Jared Padalecki, (mentioned) Mark Pellegrino

warnings: fluff and a fraction of smut

part 2/2

---

The pristine sheets of the hotel room seemed rather grim against the beauty of the sun, that shone through the thin curtains. Lay beside me, Rob, looking so alluring wrapped up in light covers that contrasted his dark curls. His head lay soft against the pillow opposite to mine, light exhales from his nose calmed me in the early hours of the morning. I watched him for a while and wanted to run my hand against his beard, but I decides against it, today is going to be a long one.

Slowly creeping out of the warm covers, I slipped into the bathroom to brush my teeth, I zoned out as I felt the bristled against my teeth and gums. I could never stop thinking about him, the way his hand felt, brushing against the most delicate parts of my skin. The delicate trace of his lips against my shoulder as heaven revelled.

I filled up the kettle with water before flicking on the lever, illuminating an ugly orange hue. Clad in only an oversized shirt, I decided it was time to get dressed.

Walking in to the room where he lay, sleeping, or so I thought- I picked out the most simple clothes. A soft, grumble of a 'hi' sounded from the plush bed.

''Mornin', Robbie.'' I turn around and smile at him, tongue poking between my teeth as I grin from the sight of him.

''Time is it?'' His voice was light yet gravelly, still tired.

''Early, you could have had a few more minutes. Didn't want to wake you, sorry.'' Giving up on getting dressed just yet, I sat back down next to him.

''You didn't, don't worry.'' He directed his gaze at me, picking up his hand to trace my cheek as I lay facing him. ''God, so beautiful.'' An almost whisper resonated from him, my heart as it always does, flipped and flared due to him.

''Shut up.'' I whined, he tugged to roll me on top of him, in a straddling position. I lay my head against his shoulder as his hands grazed up my skin. From the skin of my thigh, to my hip, following under my shirt.

''Rob.'' I sighed against him, his face leant down to place a kiss on my shoulder. ''Don't think about it, we have a big day.'' He pouts, how fucking adorable.

''I'm not doing anything, I promise.'' I see the glimmer in his eyes.

I lift my head up and places my hands on his chest, leaning down and hovering over his lips.

''Don't tease me, you won't kiss me until I brush my teeth, I know you.'' He groaned, placing a rogue strand of hair behind my ear.

''Do you?'' I raise an eyebrow, before pressing my aching lips against his, desperate for attention. He pushed back with an unrequited fever, releasing the quietest of moans into my mouth.

''Now that is love, guys and gals.'' Groaning in appreciation, he grips my waist.

His hips involuntarily bucked up to mine, pressing his against me, nothing in between us but the fabric of his boxers. He gasps, his parts his lips, this can't go any further. There's no time.

''Robbieee, no.'' I try to shuffle off him only to be flipped over and crushed by his body.

''Look what you do to me.'' He whispers, his mouth trailing wet, hot kisses down the fixate of my neck. I sigh before putting my hand over his lips. ''Let's just stay in bed.'' He mumbled into my skin.

''We literally have to be in the lobby in an hour and a half. Come on.'' He grouses, removing himself from on top of me.

''Maybe I'll catch you backstage later, if you're lucky.'' He winks my way, I bite my lip and laugh.

''Not backstage, maybe the restrooms if I feel like you deserve it.'' I give him finger guns and start to pull on what I picked out.

''Ca-Can you, leave why I get dressed?'' I turn back to look at him.

''There's nothing I haven't seen befo- Oh?'' I smirked at him. ''Got a problem?'' A raging boner poked against his boxers.

''As much as I'd love to help you, I think I'll leave it to you so we can get there quicker.'' I bite my lip, a fuchsia hue painted my face.

''See you out there.'' I leave the room and finish getting ready.

---

''Where is he?'' Misha huffed. ''Usually I'm the late one.'' Our group of six agree in a short burst of laughter.

''We had some problems this morning.'' I tried to sound as casual as possible, but as Rich is a mind reader, he chooses this as an appropriate time to tease me.

''Problems, eh? Why are you not up there?'' He flamboyantly drums my arm with his fingers, I glare at him.

''Didn't want to get carried away, told him we had to be earlier.'' I cross my arms, a shy blush plastered on my featured. An awkward silence fell over Jensen and I, although I thought we had moved past us, he clearly hadn't. Leaving it to Matt to break the tension for us.

''Tonight is karaoke night then, huh? Let's try and get Mark to revisit Rocky Horror.'' I nod in agreement.

''I can do that, he'll listen to me.'' Bad choice of words, Y/n.

''Oh, I bet he will.'' I her come from Ackles, low yet loud enough for me to hear.

''Excuse me, what?'' I ask him, innocently.

''Nothing.''

''No, if you have something to say then say it, we're all family here.'' I gesture to us all.

''It was nothing.'' I pull him to the side angrily, Jared walks from his side to the group of us.

''Look, I don't have to be here if you have a problem with me-'' I start, Rob's entered the lobby, he reads the situation.

''I still love you.'' He rushes out, a hand holds his forehead.

''Jensen, I don't love you anymore. And you clearly didn't love me, or else you wouldn't have cheated.'' Rob can make out the conversation from the distance he's in, so can the rest of the group. ''I'm happier, aren't you? We don't have to lie to ourselves any longer. You can sleep with as many women you want and I can be in the loving relationship I need.'' Rob's heart swells as I defend our relationship.

''Please, I'm not myself without you, I miss you. Give me another chance?'' His pleading eyes do nothing for me.

''You had one, you fucked it up. Let's move on from this, go fall in love, go fuck, go have fun. It's what you wanted to do whilst we were together, so do it.'' I put a hand on his shoulder as he inhales.

''I can't promise I won't let you go.'' He whispers, I shake my head.

''Try, please?'' I walk away from him, before Rob steps in.

''You okay?'' He whispers into my ear, as I stood next to him and the group.

''Yeah, just clarifying some things.'' I reach up and rub the space under his eye with my thumb.

''You-You wouldn't go back to him, would you?'' The hopeful look in his eyes almost me into tears.

''No, never, it was you the whole time. Always will be, you ain't getting rid of me now.'' I kiss his cheek before we jog to keep up with the group who had already started to move as some handlers arrived.

''Good.'' He says to himself, although I hear him, he needs to work on that.

[ibelieveinharrystyles]

Chapter Ten: We’ll Be A Fine Line

Here it is the final part of Ashley and Harry’s Story! Enjoy!!!

Christmas was a big thing for both the Hanson and Twist families, ever since that fateful day when a new tradition of joint Christmasses was coined, the two families had been intertwined. Not just by their mutual appreciation for the Gavin and Stacey Christmas special, but the adoration between two members of their families, a bond that thanks to the trials and tribulations of life was stronger than it had ever been. At last there was no hostility, no aggression, just love.

Out of the kindness of his heart, Louis had offered to drive Ashley and both the little ones up to Holmes Chapel, normally Harry would, but having just come back from filming in America, his flight had taken him straight into Manchester three days prior, rather than Heathrow. Louis and Eleanor were travelling up to Doncaster anyway, so as far as he was concerned, a little detour wouldn’t be a problem. Christmas Eve was always the best bit, Daisy was finally old enough to appreciate the traditions that Ashley once loved as a child, thankfully the traffic wasn’t too bad after all. “How are those two getting on the back?” Louis asked Ashley from the driver’s seat.

“Daisy’s watching yet another episode of Care Bears on the iPad and Robbie’s spark out, I swear all he does is sleep.” Ashley sighed, admiring her two children who were sitting either side of her in the back of Louis’ car.

“Mummy, when can we get doggies like Brucie and Cliff?” Daisy asked, looking up at from her iPad, as the two dogs sat behind them in the back of the car.

“I think we’ll have to wait and see Dais.” Ashley replied, sharing a knowing look with Eleanor, as she had asked her a few weeks beforehand for recommendations on dog breeders. 

“We’re here!” Daisy clapped in excitement as Louis pulled up on Linda’s driveway.

“Thank you so much for driving us up you two, I owe you big time.” Ashley smiled.

“It’s not a problem darling, Harry wouldn’t have wanted you getting the train, especially with the two littlens.” Louis replied.

“I’m sure my mum will be more than happy for you both to stay for tea.” Ashley offered, unbuckling Robin and putting him in his pram, before helping Daisy out of the car.

“Thanks a lot love, but we should probably get back on the road before the traffic hits, have a lovely Christmas though.” Louis smiled.

“You too, thanks again.” Ashley pushed the pram up the driveway, Linda answering the door almost immediately.

“Hello my lovelies! Merry Christmas!” Linda smiled, greeting them all with warm hugs. “Let me grab your bags for you, Anne and Harry are in the kitchen eating mince pies, Gem and Michael are still on their way.” 

“Harry!” Daisy ran off into the kitchen to find him as Ashley took Robin, who had just stirred from a nap out of his pram.

She made her way into the kitchen, Anne had already met Robin, but this would be the first time Harry saw him, Harry looked up at Ashley from where Daisy was showing him her new dress, “Hello stranger.” Ashley smiled, holding Robin in her arms, “Do you want to meet your little boy?” Harry nodded, standing up to greet him, Ashley passed him over, allowing Harry to hold him close to his chest.

“Hello little man, how’s it going?” Harry asked, rocking him softly as Robin gazed up into his eyes, “You did it Ash, he’s so perfect.”

“No Harry, we did it.”

The smell of Linda’s wonderful homemade Christmas Eve pie and mash spread throughout the house. Michael and Gemma had arrived after a nightmare journey and everyone was finally sitting around the table ready to tuck into a delicious meal. “I just wanted to make a quick toast,” Linda announced, “the past few years have been interesting and difficult for us all, but we made it through the other side. Although we’ve lost people along the way, we’ve gained two new little sweethearts, our little princess daisy, and her beautiful brother, darling Robin, I’m so thankful to you for welcoming me and Ash as part of your family. While we’ve always felt so welcomed and loved in all the years of our friendship, the arrival of little Robbie has finally completed us all as one unit. So let’s raise a glass to chosen family.” Everyone clinked their glasses before proceeding to tuck into their dinner. 

“Thank you for having us Linda, this is beautiful as always.” Anne smiled.

“It’s delicious Linda.” Harry smiled.

After falling asleep in her old bedroom, Ash stirred from her nap to hear nothing but silence from the rest of the house, the nap was well deserved after the lengthy drive up from London. She made her way downstairs to see Harry sat on the sofa, Robin lying peacefully on his chest as he hummed along to the faint sound of Christmas music coming from the speaker on the mantelpiece. “Glad to see you two are getting to know each other, how has he been?” Ashley smiled.

“An absolute angel.” Harry replied as Ashley sat beside him, resting her head on his shoulder.

“Where’s the others?” She whispered.

“They took Dais to see the Christmas lights in the village, the little man was getting grizzly so I thought he’d be better off staying here.” Harry explained.

“You’re an incredible dad,” Ashley smiled.

“Ash, I’ve literally known him for less than a day.” Harry chuckled.

“Yeah I know, but I’ve seen you with Daisy and I’ve seen you with our little Robin, and you’re incredible with them both.”

“Mummy it’s Christmas!” Daisy ran into Ashley’s bedroom, jumping up and down on her bed excitedly. Ashley wiped the sleep from her eyes, looking up to see Daisy, and Harry stood by the door holding Robin. “Harry came over to bring us a special Christmas breakfast!” Daisy exclaimed. 

“Merry Christmas,” Harry smiled, sitting on the bed beside Ashley, Robin dressed in a little baby grow covered in Christmas robins.

“Merry Christmas to you too.” Ashley replied, “Come here little man.” Ashley smiled, taking Robin from Harry. 

“Have you told Daisy yet?” Harry asked.

“Told me what?” Daisy interrupted, still jumping up and down on the bed.

“Well if you get dressed we’re going to take you to Nanny Anne’s house to get your first big present.” Ashley told her.

“Okay!” Daisy cried, jumping off the bed and scrambling to find her red dress and white tights. 

They eventually made it to Anne’s house, Daisy was beyond excited, Linda had Robin in her arms to allow Ashley and Harry to focus on Daisy and her present. They led her through the kitchen, both holding a hand each, “Now Daisy, you’ve got to be really quiet when we go into the conservatory,” Harry told her, he opened the door slowly and let Daisy in. “Merry Christmas Daisy.” He led her to the basket in the centre of the room, inside was a fluffy little caramel colour labradoodle puppy. 

“Is it mine?” Daisy asked.

“Yep, she’s your little puppy.” Ashley told her, picking the puppy up and holding her so Daisy could stroke her. “What do you want to call her Dais?” 

“She looks like honey, let’s call her Honey.” Daisy replied, transfixed on her new best friend.

“That’s beautiful Daisy, she’s going to love you.” Harry told her as he crouched beside her, wrapping her in a big hug.

“This is the best Christmas ever.” Daisy smiled.

Everyone else had arrived at Anne’s and they were finally all sitting around the table, tucking into their turkey. “I just wanted to say something,” Ashley said, “I know I’ve been a bit all over the place this year, I messed some of you around, some more than others. But having you all here means a lot to me, I’m so incredibly grateful that my children have such a loving family. I wanted to give you one of your presents early Harry, before we do the rest later, I know we’re not together, but if anything ever happened to me, I’d want to know my children were in safe hands, I’d want to know they had a loving home with a loving father. Which is why I got you this.” 

She handed him a white envelope, he opened it, pulling out several pieces of paper, he scanned over it, before seeing the words ‘adoption proceedings’, “Is this what I think it is?” Harry asked.

“Yeah, Matt hasn’t been an active part of Daisy’s life since her birth, and I spoke to your solicitor and he said it’s completely viable for you to be Daisy’s adoptive father.” Ashley explained.

“This is the best Christmas present you could’ve got me Ash, thank you so much.” He wrapped his arms around her, hugging her tightly.

“I know it’s an unorthodox situation because we’re not together but it feels right.” Ashley told everyone.

“I think it’s a beautiful idea,” Anne smiled, “I know Linda will agree, we’re so proud of you both and we’re so grateful for you giving us two wonderful grandchildren.”

“That made his year Ash,” Gemma whispered to Ashley as they stood at the sink in Anne’s kitchen washing up the last of the dinner plates.

“I’m glad he was happy, it just felt right, even though we aren’t in a relationship he’s been the best father figure Daisy has ever had. When I think about the time I spent with Will, he didn’t love Daisy, he wanted me, Daisy was just an extra. But when it comes to Harry, he accepts that Daisy is part of the package, and he’s happy that she is.” Ashley replied, gazing through to the living room where Daisy and Harry were playing with Honey.

“You’re good for him Ash. You, Daisy and baby Robin keep his world spinning, I know you’ve been through a lot but it’s always going to be you. Regardless of who he’s with he’ll always pick you and the kids, because although he’s probably scared to admit it, he really does adore you.” Gemma told her.

“Mummy! It’s snowing!” Daisy ran into the kitchen screaming hysterically, Harry and Honey trailing behind her. 

Harry chased after her, managing to scoop her up in his arms, “Before we see the snow Dais, do you want to open some more presents?” Harry asked.

“Yes!” Daisy clapped excitedly as Harry bounced her up and down on his hip.

The two families lay flat out on the sofas in Anne’s living room, Daisy was curled up beside Anne, playing with Honey, and baby Robin was fast asleep on Harry’s chest. Ashley stood outside in the cold, flakes of snow dancing through the lengths of her hair. She stared up at the blanket of stars, one thing she loved about Holmes Chapel was how clear the sky was, unlike London, was how clear the sky remained each night. “I wondered where you got to,” She turned to see Harry joining her as they both leant against the fence of Anne garden terrace. 

“It’s a madhouse in there, I’m surprised Daisy still has so much energy.” Ashley remarked.

“Well at least she’ll sleep like an angel tonight.” Harry chuckled.

“Fingers crossed,” Ashley smiled, “I’ve had the loveliest day today, I’m really glad you’re home.”

“I am too, it was great working on another film, but nothing beats being here with you and the little ones.” Harry replied.

“Harry when we started this year together, I told you I wanted to take things one step at a time, because I was scared, I was scared of what would happen if I opened my heart again, I was scared of getting hurt, and I was scared of Daisy getting caught up in everything.” Ashley told him, “When really I was incomplete without you.” 

“Ash what are you trying to say?” Harry asked.

“I want us to try again, as a couple,” Ashley explained, “I know that this might be a bit sudden, but seeing your bond with Robin, and seeing the way you are with Daisy. It doesn’t end there either, you’ve done so much for me, you’ve been more of a rock for me than anyone ever has, I was just so naive I didn’t realise that even when you were half way across the world you were still right there by my side.” 

“Ash,” Harry whispered, taking hold of her hands, “I want nothing more than to be with you.” 

“It’s funny, isn’t it?” Ashley kept her eyes on Harry’s, tracing delicate patterns across the skin of his knuckles as a smile beamed across her face. “That we always knew, but were too scared to say anything.” 

“I never felt the need to say it.” Harry’s gaze was intent, as a tentative grin appeared on his face. “But I love you.”

“Forever?” Ashley whispered.

“Always, my golden girl.”

[vanchlo]

The Assistant / Chapter Thirty-Seven, “The Tables Have Turned”

Clickable Links:

- Masterlist feat. all chapters and POV surveys

- Inspo tag

- Playlist

                                 SNEAKYYYYYY PEEEEEK

“At least I had my orientation with Harry to look forward to that coming Friday, but I still wouldn’t start at his firm for another week after that. The anticipation was killing me, and so were the little moments Harry and I shared when I happened to remember them. Sometimes I wish the alcohol had stolen those memories away, because they hurt too much to remember, but then at other times I’d never wish them away, because they give me something irreplaceable - hope.”

Music Inspo: Everywhere by Niall Horan (click to listen)

              “You think I like having you in here, destroying everything that was me until all that’s left is you and a dead shell? You're all I bloody think about ... dream about. You're in my gut ... my throat ... I'm drowning in you.” 

                        - Spike, Buffy the Vampire Slayer (S5 x E14)

“How’s yer dad doin’?” Harry asks me when I return to my seat across from him, the soda threatening to spill over the top of my cup.

“He’s doing good, thanks. It took a while for his energy to come back, and sometimes he gets tired easily, but it’s a process,” I answer, plucking a chip from the small white bag and drenching it in the yellow queso. “He’s pretty happy to have all of his hair back, and he’s started to get back into running and lifting weights. Late last summer he started back to work where he does construction.”

“Wow, I feel like I learn mo’ ‘bout yer dad e’ry time we talk ‘bout him. I didn’t know he was into weights and all that, good fer him. Bloody hell he’s like superman. Ya dunno how happy I am t’ hear he’s back on his feet, and doin’ well,” he murmurs with a gentle warmth adorning his features.

It spreads with a spark across my skin when I feel his fingers wrap around mine, squeezing my hand. I’m guilty again with an absence of words when I look back into his eyes, all syllables stolen away from me at the sight and by his gesture. I don’t need to say anything though because unspoken words pass between us as he stares back at me, memories unraveling from all of the times he showed up for me. I still don’t know how I could have ever doubted he cared about me.

“Thank you,” I reply emphatically, squeezing his toasty hand in return. His thumb brushes along the back of my hand before letting it go.

“Welcome, Becks. ‘m sorry I wasn’t there at tha end t’ celebrate,” he responds softly, sadness laced throughout his words as his head falls. His eyes avoid mine as he picks up a few pieces of shredded cheese that fell onto the wrapper laid in front of him.

“It’s okay, Harry, we both kinda forgot.” His head of curls goes up and down at my softly spoken words that only brush the surface. Regardless, I think that it did the job and he knows what I mean. We both know that we ignored the other and forgot, whether on accident or purpose. “I guess there are several reasons for our celebratory dinner and drinks.”

“Very true, bug,” he agrees, the dimples finding their way back onto his cheeks once again. The itchy nervousness abates when his eyes lift again to mine and he holds out his half-eaten taco, grease and warm sour cream dripping from it. “Cheers t’ yer dad’s recovery, catchin’ up with old friends, and tha best o’ all - Becks gettin’ tha associate position at me firm workin’ with me. ‘m excited t’ see what tha future holds for me new favourite lawyer.”

“Stop it, or else I’m going to start crying, and you’ve seen me cry more than enough,” I smile, blinking back the tears as I hold out my taco and bump it against his. “Cheers to new beginnings, Harry.”

“Cheers, Becks, and ‘s okay if ya cry. Happy tears are good too.”

“Very true,” I agree, taking a page from his book before I finish the rest of my taco, a silence falling over our table. It’s replaced with crinkling of wrappers, sips of soda, chewing of crunchy chips and chocolatey churros, and stolen glances at the other.

“How’re Skye and Robbie these days? What’re they up t’?” he inquires, squashing the wrapper of his third taco into a ball that he sets on the side of the tray for our trash. I watch as he plucks a quesadilla from the stack of dwindling food, but he stops and grabs a churro as well with a sly grin. “Hey, they’re fer me too.”

“Harry,” I warn teasingly, a giggle peeking out from my words which he quickly echos, although accidentally. “Um, they’re both good. Skye got a new job at a salon on the west side that she likes. It’s called Roots or something or other, and Robbie is still working at Black and Blue. He actually started dating a girl recently, but I’ve yet to meet her. God, it seems like everybody else is having luck with love, beside us. Myles told me he’s engaged now, and then Robbie’s girlfriend, and Skye said the other day she has a date this week.”

“Ya, we’re ratha pathetic, aren’t we? We haven’t even had any drinks yet and we’re gushin’ ‘bout bloody love,” he cracks, clucking his tongue before feeding the rest of the crisp churro between his rose lips. My oh my, is that a scenic sight right there.

“Yeah, you’re right about that,” I remark, finishing my second taco and grabbing the remaining quesadilla, earning a disapproving head shake from him.

As the flavors of the tangy sour cream, fiery seasoned chicken, and gooey cheese melt on my tongue, our words hit a sensitive spot in my heart. I just hope we can avoid it for the rest of the night, or else I’m afraid I might blurt out some words I’ve been itching to say.

+

“Hurry up, ‘s bloody cold,” Harry titters, digging his hands further into the pockets of his matte black coat.

“How far are we even going?”

“Oh, hush, you. ‘s not very far, jus’ anotha block,” he answers, his lengthy legs far ahead of mine.

“Harry, that’s what you said like five minutes ago, and slow the fuck down!”

“Hey, watch tha language, there’s no need t’ swear,” he remarks, meeting my eyes over his shoulder with his brows quirked into a V. When we arrive at a busy intersection, our feet stop on the sidewalk, and a muttered curse falls from his lips.

“Oh, so you can swear, but I can’t?” I quip, poking his arm playfully.

“Yes, li’l one, I can. ‘m not bein’ a very good role model fer ya, am I now?” he replies, a hand leaving his pocket to pat the top of my head covered in a knit hat. I respond with a roll of my eyes as his sly grin graces my eyes. “Are ya shrinkin’ on me, Becks?”

“Don’t.”

He only giggles, turning back to the onslaught of moving lights around us. I’ve always enjoyed the sights of London like this, the neon and fluorescent signs hugging every street, and the towering buildings. Harry mumbles a ‘c’mon’, tugging on my sleeve until I follow him across the crosswalk. Soon, we come upon a pub with a green neon sign donning the front, reading ‘Murphy’s’ that Harry pulls me into. His long legs lead me through the entryway, across red-tiled flooring, and to the long wooden bar where boisterous laughs sound.

“Can I have two Purple Haze martinis, please?” Harry says to the bartender, a tall fellow with an interesting red mustache that curls at its ends. He nods and turns around to grab two martini glasses.

“What are Purple Hazes, like is it something Prince liked to drink?” I ask Harry, falling onto the black bar stool beside him.

“I dunno, but you’ll like it. Jus’ trust me,” he smiles as he slides off his coat, and I admire the new view of his side profile. Something I haven’t seen in a long time. Seven months both does and doesn’t feel like forever, especially compared to that day I found him standing at the front of that lecture hall. Yesterday, when I turned around to find him standing in Myles’ office, it felt like it had been years. I blame it on all of the hurt. “‘Scuse me, can we also get two Skittles shots? Thanks.”

“So, now you’re my drinking mentor too, huh?”

“Pretty much, ya,” he smirks, balling his hand into a fist that he lays his cheek on to look at me. The smile winding its way along his lips under the dim lights drills a hole into the armor around my heart that’s cracking more and more. “And yer not doin’ that sissy thing ya do where ya have a glass o’ water on tha side.”

“Harry, I don’t want to be hungover tomorrow!”

“Becks, you’ll be fine! T’morrow’s a Saturday, anyways. What will it hurt?” he answers, shrugging his shoulders as the crinkles begin around his eyes. They almost disappear from my view when he looks to the bartender who sets the shots down in front of us, Harry mentioning adding it to his bill after thanking him. “Bottoms up, bug.”

“Oh, God,” I sigh, taking the greenish-yellow shotglass of liquid from his outstretched hand. “Stop looking at me that way.”

“What way?” he inquires with a furrowed brow, holding the shot close to his grinning lips.

“Like you know we’re about to get drunk.”

“Cheers,” is all he says, clinking his glass against mine before downing the liquid effortlessly. Shaking my head, I exhale loudly as the liquid nears my lips, and then it burns with hints of sweet and sour on the way down. “See, not so bad, was it?”

“Shut up,” I retort in the middle of a cough racking my chest, setting down the glass with a clunk.

“I have a question,” he announces after his giggling dissolves into the air. “Ya neva told me how you and Skye met, so how’d it happen?”

“You’re thinking about that right now?” I quip, carding a hand through my hair after I slip off my mauve-colored beanie. He shyly nods as he fidgets with a ring on his left hand, meeting my gaze only shortly. “We met in first grade. She was scary at first, because one day early on she got mad at me for stealing her friend, or something- I can’t remember. Then the next day, she came up to me and we were both wearing pink Hello Kitty shoes, and decided to be best friends. Like they say, the rest was history, and we were joined at the hip from then on. We were in the same class a lot throughout the following years, took the same electives in high school, and moved to London together to go to uni.”

“Sounds ratha picturesque, dontcha think? Or I s’pose that’s how it goes with five-year olds,” Harry murmurs, nodding to the bartender when he brings us the purple martinis. An awe leaves my lips when I see the ombre of purple hues filling the glass. “‘s vodka, Curacao, Black Raspberry Liqueur, and cranberry juice. I think you’ll like it. Go ‘head, try it, Becks.”

I obey and bring the chilly glass to my mouth, relaxing at the sweet taste of berries, filling me with the color purple. Then I wince at the harsh bite of the alcohol, eliciting a titter from Harry whose foot I kick with mine. Beside me, he gulps down a quarter of the drink, unfazed.

“How about you and Myles?”

“Good question, I dunno if ‘ve eva told ya that story,” he hums, tickling his stubbly chin with his fingers while thinking. Even the way the skin between his eyebrows disappears when he’s thinking is cute. God, everything about him is and I don’t know if I’ll be able to keep it to myself once all of this alcohol passes my lips. As another drink of the martini burns my throat, I think I may be warming up to that idea, but there’s the possibility it could all be for nothing if the alcohol steals our memories away.

“We met in high school inn’a class I can’t rememba tha name of, but we both hadd’a crush on tha same girl, and we both played guitar. So it was natural,” he mumbles, licking his lips and making me feel woozy all over at the sight.

“Sure, that’s a real natural friendship,” I giggle. “You know I’m a lightweight, by the way.”

“Oh I know, ‘m bettin’ onnit,” he returns with a wink, bringing the large glass to his bubblegum lips.

“You know what’s good?” I follow, watching his thick eyebrows hike up his forehead. “That Kinky stuff,” I respond, taking another sip. I almost choke on it when I glance at the shocked look screwing up his face.

“Becks.”

“No, God- t-the vodka, Harry . . . not that other stuff,” I chuckle, my entirety collapsing into nervous laughter. His own echoes mine as a prickly warmth spreads like fire across my body.

“My bloody God, Rebecca Holte, are ya already feelin’ that drink?” he hums, his bony knee knocking against mine underneath the table. The fiery nervousness abates briefly at the mention of my formal name, one I can’t recall the last time I’ve heard him say in its entirety. It comes as a shock to me, considering at times I’m convinced he’s forgotten it.  

“No, I-I just thought a liquor connoisseur such as yourself would know what I’m talking about.”

“Sure, I totally don’t believe you on that one, love,” he replies, scoffing when I softly hit his shoulder. “Yer prolly into handcuffs and gags, arentcha?”

“Harry Styles!” I exclaim, squirming when his hand covers my mouth. It falls within seconds, but the spicy vanilla smell coating his body remains with me, along with the warmth of his touch. Most of all, the familiarity and safety wrapped all in it causes a pang in my chest. “I do not do handcuffs, or bloody gags, and nor would I ever tell you, if I did.”

Words fleet his lips as he drowns them with another swallow of his violet martini. I turn away with my hair tickling my cheek as it shakes from side to side. It flies in front of my eyes when his fingers plunge into my sides, yanking laughs from my mouth as he lifts his eyebrows at me with a look that tells me to be quiet.

“I missed you,” I blurt out at random, feeling his fingers still on my side and his expression relaxes. The happiness falls from his eyes and cheeks, and with it I turn away, unable to deal with the disappointment I’m sure I’m on the verge of.

“I missed you too, y’know . . . loads,” Harry concurs, his fingers dangling at my side until they wander to my hands clasped in my lap. He steals one of them away and holds it against his leg, rubbing circles into my knuckles.

If this doesn’t make me spill the beans, then I’m positive the following liquor just may, and it all might come crashing down in front of me.

The next shot, a Lemon Drop, didn’t go down as smoothly. I felt like I was going to hack up a lung when I feel Harry’s warm hand on my back.

“Alright?” he murmurs in a rush, patting my back firmly until the cough subsides. “Sorry, that lemon one ‘s kinda hard sumtimes, ‘s ratha sour.”

“Ya think?” I respond, trying to make it go away with the last gulp of the Purple Haze, but it’s only a few seconds of relief.

I exhale and only feel his hand leave me when he orders a water, and two Tequila Sunrises, his a stronger one.

“Breathe, love, a water’s on ‘s way,” Harry hums, squeezing my arm. I nod and swallow hard, embarrassment coating me like a musty sheet.

“I thought you said no water.”

“Hush, I gotta take care o’ me li’l one,” he assures me, bringing a finger to his lips when I dare a look at him. A smile returns to my lips and remains there when the cold water graces them, him sipping at the Tequila Sunrise sat between his ringed fingers.

Oh, what I’d give to be able to wake up to a sunrise with him by my side. Oh, Harry.

“Hey, wha’s that ya got there?” he inquires, soon his painted nail lifting the bracelets from my right wrist. “Becks has a tattoo?! Since when?” he exclaims, astonishment and shock mixing into a cocktail amongst his features. His eyes bug out of his skull and then narrow when they return to my wrist.

“It’s a Queen Anne’s Lace, Robbie has one too, just on his upper arm and bigger. We got them when we were eighteen, um . . . . after our Gran passed. Grandma Holte . . Ann Holte,” I explain, helping him by removing the bracelets from around my wrist.

I’m not sure if it’s the alcohol or just him, but my wrist finds a new home in his palm that he turns to better look at. The shock is replaced by a slow smile transforming his face, bleeding into his eyes that find their way back to mine.

“‘s gorgeous, Becks, truly. ‘ve always found tattoos o’ flowers t’ be so beautiful, yer makin’ me want t’ get anotha one even mo’ now. I mean, I have tha rose and anotha sumwhere I think, but now I want anotha thanks t’ you,” he hums, tracing the ink with the tip of his thumb, just a whisper of his touch. “‘m sorry ‘bout yer Gran, sounded like it was premature which ‘s always tha worst. Knew ya were strong, but fook, ya amaze me e’ry day, Becks.” Unannounced tears press warmly at the back of my eyes as he admires the sprawling flower, tracing each little petal until he’s tracked them all.

“You didn’t think I was that badass, huh?”

“No, ‘ve always thought ya were a badass, babe. A flower tattoo jus’ takes the cake,” he quips, looking me in the eyes and sending another crack down the case in my chest.

I don’t know how many more little shocks like this I can take, or my heart, before it breaks free from the cage I locked it up in so long ago. I hid it there to protect it from him breaking it, again.

+

“This ‘s me,” he announces, bringing us to stop in the parking lot. My confusion only grows as I look around, until my eyes stop on the black Harley Davidson in front of us.

“What? It’s the middle of winter, Harry.”

“I know, I know. That’s what e’rybody says, but I dress warm. I like t’ take her out e’ry once in a while t’ keep her runnin’ good. Maybe ‘ll hafta take ya onn’a ride when ‘s not too cold fer pussy Becks,” he coos, voice rising to a mocking tone.

“I’m sorry I don’t like the cold wind ripping my skin off,” I titter and his eyes roll into the back of his head with a groan. I stand there awkwardly, eyes following him as he grabs the helmet from the locked bag towards the back seat.

“Ya sure yer good t’ drive, bug? I can give ya a ride if yer not too much o’ a puss puss,” Harry remarks, turning to face me as he holds the buckle strap to the side, a smirk claiming his face.

“Yeah I’m good, thanks. Those four waters and twenty trips to the bathroom helped,” I answer, although regretfully as everything inside of me screams at me to accept.

Girl, how dumb are you?

Quiet, demon, I can’t take it back now.

“Good, ‘m glad t’ hear that, love. I uh, reckon ‘ll see ya inn’a week then?” he replies, sliding the helmet over his dark curls, fingering the chin strap.

“Yeah, the eighteenth.”

“Don’t miss me too much now,” he jests from behind the lack of visor that he had pushed up and out of the way. Even with the bulky metallic gold helmet, he’s so goddamn sexy it’s unbelievable.

“As long as you don’t miss me too bad either.”

“Eh, ‘ll try not t’ but it’ll be hard,” he echoes jokingly, squishing his lips to the side with a thought and suddenly they collapse into a pout. Then, he winks at me as he settles onto his bike. “See ya inn’a week, Becks.”

“Bye, Harry. Have a good weekend, and careful driving.”

“You too, bug, drive safe. ‘ll talk t’ ya soon, gotta get tha recipe fer that Kinky Blue drink from ya,” he tells me, the bike rumbling to life when he twists the key in the ignition.

“Bye,” I exhale, taking one last look at him before I turn around. I put one foot in front of the other and walk away from him, my least favorite thing to do of all things on this planet.

From behind my steering wheel a few cars down, I watch in awe as he slides on gloves before toeing away the kickstand and pulling out of the lot, looking more handsome than ever.

Just when I think he can’t surprise me, he does just that, and in the best way possible. Every time.

+

“Care to explain where you’ve been all night, missy?”

“It’s not even eleven, Mom,” I respond with a firmness trying in my voice, but I can’t muster it as I slide off my boots. No, there’s not really any reason in the world that I could be upset right now, or feign anything other than utter happiness.

“I know, I can read a clock, Ree. Hey, what’s that big smile for? I never got to hear how your interview went yesterday.”

“Oh yeah,” I realize aloud, the words falling automatically as I hang up my coat in the closet by our front door. Boy, is that a lot to unpack and rehash, and yet I look forward to relaying it all to her. That way, I get to relive all of it a little bit, and I don’t mind if I do. “Well, you were out all night partying too, so you can’t be mad at me.”

“You got me there, I’m guilty. Or can I say that yet, Ms. Lawyer?” Skye responds, a lightness showing in her words. After closing the door to the closet, I find the anxious eagerness waiting in her eyes, bringing elation to the front of my mind as I nod.

“I got the job yesterday,” I barely am able to say before she crossed the room, surrounding me in a hug. “Harry called me when I got home from work and told me the good news!”

“Oh my god, Ree, that’s so amazing! I’m so happy for you, holy shit!” she exclaims, amazing me at her strength when she squeezes me with her noodle arms. “Was he happy to see you?!”

“Yeah, I think so, and fuck he looked so good, Skye. He hugged me the first second he saw me.”

“Aww, that’s so bloody cute. So, when do you start?”

Pulling away, I look her in the eyes and revel in the happy celebration coating me in waves again.

“Monday the twenty-eighth, but I have orientation with him next Friday.”

“Oooo, lucky you!” she smiles, and I swear my happiness about the whole thing has only doubled since she stopped being angry at me for applying.

“And I may or may not have just went out for those belated dinner and drinks with him tonight,” I reveal slowly yet eagerly, watching more shock paint her face and her jaw drops.

“Ree, you basically went out on a date with him, that’s my girl!”

“Skye, it wasn’t a date!” I protest feebly, because once again any of the negative emotions have no chance at outshining the wonderful positive ones right this second. “It was just to celebrate my new job, and to make up for the dinner we never had this summer, and the drinks he wanted to get for my birthday which also didn’t happen.”

“Wait, what?!” she almost explodes, nearly all of the emotions under the sun covering her face, if only for a few seconds at a time. “I thought you didn’t talk to him on your birthday?”

“Well yeah, I didn’t besides that one text,” I answer, and then I slowly see the realization shine in her eyes.

“You opened his presents?!” she shouts, coming to grab my arms as I giggle with a nod.

“Yeah, after I got home and right before he called. Talk about a lot of happy tears yesterday.”

“No wonder you weren’t answering my calls, and I don’t blame you, you were a busy girl. Busy with Harry,” Skye notes aloud, the same sunny emotions showing in her words, but they die down as she nears her finish. “I told you he still cared about you.”

“I know, you were right all along, and it kills me that I ever believed he didn’t. He got me a mini purple piano keyboard, a journal to write songs in, the first season of FRIENDS, and wrote me the sweetest birthday card. Then, he called right after to tell me I got the job, and fuck, it all seems like a dream sometimes. But then I called him at work today to set up the orientation, and he had the idea to get together tonight, and it’s all like a dream come true,” I tell her softly, and slowly it all doesn’t seem so fake anymore, but instead it feels just like the dream I’ve always wanted my life to become.

“Girl, you are so lucky,” Skye comments, dragging me by the hand over to the sofa where we fall with a thud, heads resting on the back cushion. “Did you kiss him tonight? Because God, Ree, you are both so in love with each other, I dunno how you haven’t kissed him already.”

“I don’t know,” I muse aloud, staring at the ceiling, but really all I can see is him smiling at me at the bar. His hand on my back when I was coughing, bringing my hand into his when we said we missed the other, and all of those feelings sitting in his eyes that I’m sure he could’ve seen in mine as well. “I think I’ll wait until I get settled at the job, because starting a new job is always the worst part and overwhelming enough as it is.”

“If you say so, Boops, but I figure that’s not too bad of an idea.”

“Yeah, guess why?” I counter, turning my head to face her, finding strands of purple hair sticking out of her messy bun. She looks back at me, confusion etched into the lines in her forehead. “He’s my mentor for the next few years and I’m his mentee, so I get to work with him every day and all day.”

“Ree, you should’ve led with that! Holy shit, why didn’t you?” she exclaims, swatting my arm in disbelief as I dissolve into a happy laugh. “That’s amazing! You get to work with him and under him, it sounds like a pretty good deal,” she chuckles, her laughing lips falling into a please smile.

“I know, I really can’t believe the last two days sometimes. I hit the jackpot, the Harry jackpot,” I giggle happily, relaxing against the sofa, trying to remember his spicy vanilla scent. If I try hard enough, I can smell it when his hand covered my mouth in a joke, and the warmth of his touch the few times our hands met. It wasn’t nearly enough times, though. “I have to work with Myles my entire second week though, because he’ll be in Scotland to try the case I’m helping him prep for my first week.”

“That’s shitty,” she grimaces, crossing her arms over her chest clad in a fuzzy blue bathrobe. “Just ask him out when he gets back then, it’d be too annoying starting to date while he’s away. If you didn’t, I’m pretty sure you’d die from missing him, Ree.”

“Fuck, I already might, I’m dreading it,” I sigh sadly, not even wanting to think about how pathetic I already feel not looking forward to that week.

“I know you are, but don’t. You have so much more to look forward to just in the next few weeks, and maybe you can sneak your second and third date in there, and a kiss perhaps.”

“Oh my God, Skye, shut up,” I retort, but it’s soon consumed by my laughter as she pulls me into her arms and her chin rests on my head.

“I’m so blooming happy for you, Ree. I’ve been waiting a long time for this.”

“So have I, Skye, so fucking long,” I recall aloud, trying not to let the melancholy find me as I lose myself thinking about how ungodly perfect he looked tonight. And how I get to see that handsome face five days a week for the near future; talk about lucky. Talk about a dreamboat finally lifting its sail.

+

The next few days seemed as if they took twice as long, and the mild headache I woke up to on Saturday morning didn’t help. Although relaxing, the day dragged on and soon it was Sunday, with another long week ahead of me. At least I had my orientation with Harry to look forward to that coming Friday, but I still wouldn’t start at his firm for another week after that. The anticipation was killing me, and so were the little moments Harry and I shared when I happened to remember them. Sometimes I wish the alcohol had stolen those memories away because they hurt too much to remember, but then at other times I’d never wish them away, because they give me something irreplaceable - hope.

One of the many things they don’t tell you about becoming an adult is how music makes everything all the more tolerable, and exciting. Air Hostess by Busted fills one of my ears as I pass the aisle for boxed pasta, pasta sauces, and the like. On an endcap, I grab a box of fettuccine that I toss into my cart. Lifting my eyes, my legs move again and come across a figure that walks right out in front of me. Our metal carts bang against the other’s as a warmth tickles my insides, and my lips.

“God, Styles, you’re an awful driver,” I remark with a tsk, removing the earbuds to stuff into my pocket.

“Oh, hey, Becks. ‘m sorry I didn’t see ya there,” he comments, turning his tired green eyes to mine. He messes with the gray knit beanie covering most of his messy locks, and it suddenly makes me hyper aware of my godawful just-fell-out-of-bed appearance.

“No duh you didn’t,” I snicker, kneading the plastic sheath on the cart’s push bar. “Wow, nice Sunday Best, I’m impressed,” I tease, running my eyes over the baggy gray sweats covering his legs and the cream Abbey Road crewneck on his torso.

“You as well, Ms. Power Rangers,” he quips, nodding his head at my outfit that compares very much to his with black cheetah sweats, a hoodie, and beanie. “Which one was yer favourite since there was neva a purple one when we were li’l?”

“I know, I felt so ripped off by that,” I sigh, following him as he takes off and turns into the next aisle. “But I always loved the red power ranger, I don’t really know why.”

“Hmmm, interestin’ seein’ how he was always tha one in charge. D’ya have a thing fer bossy men or sumthin’, Becks?”

“Oh, shut up,” I laugh, tapping his bum with the front of my cart, earning evil eyes from him over his shoulder. “Who was your favorite Power Ranger, then?” I say, turning the tables to him. He comes to a stop in front of me, straying from his empty cart to grab a few cans of corn and peas.

“Green, I think. Can’t really rememba why,” he shrugs, placing the cans in the cart, soon returning to another section of shelves to pluck a large can of crushed tomatoes from it. “Which season was yer fav’?”

“Time Force, for sure.”

“Oh c’mon, Dino Force was far betta,” he scoffs disbelievingly, giving me another dirty look as he sets down the large can in his cart, crossing off something on the piece of blue paper he holds.

“Maybe you should be friends with my brother, seeing how you like all of the same stuff. The green Power Ranger was his favourite, and so was Dino Force,” I laugh, comparing two different brands of green beans, deciding on the cheaper one that I grab. My legs pass his cart and when I see him shrug his shoulders with a sly grin, I softly swat him on the arm, his name leaving me.

“Becks, ya betta watch it,” he giggles, catching my arm in his gentle grasp.

“Or what?”

“Don’t test me,” he warns, but the grin creasing his cheeks tells me otherwise, he’s harmless. I bump my shoulder against his after he lets go, but not without a tickle from him.

“Harry Styles,” I groan, grabbing a can of tuna from the shelf. His grin is wider when I turn around, rolling my eyes at him on my way back to my cart.

“Rebecca Holte,” he whines in a mocking voice, once again shocking me with his recollection of my name.

“Don’t, it sounds weird when you say my name like that.”

“It really does tho’,” he remarks agreeingly, words falling into a hearty laugh. I almost echo it until I spot the look on his face. Following his eyes to the shelves, I find his stuck to a display of Spaghettios. Some have meatballs in them, hotdogs, the pasta are in different shapes, and some cans are bigger than others. I’m not sure which one he’s looking at, but the absence of anything on his face whisks that question away. “Alright?” I ask softly, taking a few steps towards him, and he wakes back up when my hand touches his arm.

“Y-Ya,” he hums sadly, letting my fingers come around his forearm, almost as if I’m about to hook arms with him. God, I wish. “‘s been a while since ‘ve seen these, and even longa since I ate ‘em. I always used t’ eat ‘em at me granddad’s house with a piece o’ buttered bread,” he explains, nodding towards the arrangement.

“Oh, Harry,” I exhale, sadness bending my features as I squeeze his arm. He musters a forced laugh, carrying his eyes over to mine with apology held in them. “It’s almost been a year, hasn’t it?”

“Ya, this week. I can’t believe it,” he remarks softly, kneading his bottom lip between his thumb and pointer finger of his free right hand. “Almost think I should grab a can fer him, but I dunno if ‘d like ‘em now. I don’t wanna ruin that memory.”

“It’s okay, you don’t have to buy it. You could buy or do something else to remember him, Harry.”

He nods beside me as I look up at him and watch the thoughts paint his face. It seems his face goes through every emotion within a minute - sadness, regret, confusion, frustration, grief, etc.

“Maybe get something you both like.”

“Ya, he loved those fudge-striped cookies, maybe I can find some o’ those instead,” he decides, tearing his eyes away from the lines of cans to meet mine. “Thanks . . Boops,” he smiles, that simple image calming the worrying of my heart.

I laugh and walk away from him, returning to my cart that I begin to push, but I find Harry’s in my way. With a playful groan, my lips part, “Come on, Harold, move it so we can go to the cookie aisle.”

“Hey, that’s not me name,” he responds, wrapping his bare fingers around the handle, giving me another glare over his shoulder.

“Well, neither is Rebecca, so don’t call me that.”

“But it ‘s actually yer name. Yer confusin’, y’know that?” he tuts, shaking his head as he looks straight ahead, moving down the aisle. “Hey, how’d ya eva come t’ be called ‘Boops’, anyways? I rememba Skye would call ya that sometimes when ‘d come ova.”

“God, I can’t believe you remember that nickname,” I groan, receiving a light chuckle from him ahead of me. On purpose, I bump the front of my cart against his bum again as he waits for somebody to pass.

“Becks- I mean, Rebecca, stop,” Harry says, turning halfway to meet my giggling eyes. One sits in his greens as well, but he only lets it show as a curling of one side of his mouth. “Ya I rememba, that’s all she called you. I think she did it on purpose.”

“Probably, knowing Skye she did it to bug me or embarrass me,” I comment, taking a right down the big aisle in between all of the smaller ones. Rows upon rows of cookies come before our eyes soon, along with baking supplies like flour, sugar, and chocolate chips. Dang, the amount of chocolate in this aisle is unreal, and somehow comforting. “My dad started it when I was a baby, or so I’ve been told. He’d tap my nose with his finger and it always made me laugh, I guess, so it stuck.”

“Aww, that’s adorable. Does he still boop yer nose when he calls ya that?”

“Sometimes,” I laugh, leaving my cart on the side as I pull out my phone, bringing up my shopping list. “So what are you all buying today?”

“That’s cute, y’know, and jus’ stockin’ up on some stuff. ‘m makin’ a pot pie t’night, so needed stuff fer that - carrots, an onion, celery, pie dough, broth, chicken, y’know,” he answers, bending down to squat so he can pull a pack of fudge stripes from the shelf. “Ah, here they are. I can’t rememba tha last time I had these eitha, but ‘m excited t’ try ‘em again, and think of Granddad when I have ‘em with a glass o’ milk.”

“Good idea,” I agree, patting him on the back as I tote a sack of flour in my other arm.

He finds me with his eyes over his shoulder, and those to-die-for dimples make an appearance again as his lips open with a smile, “Thanks, Boops,” he grins, tapping my nose with his finger. I want to tell him how original he’s being with that response, or the lack thereof, but the butterflies taking flight in my stomach consume all the bravery I had. “What’re you buyin’, hmm?”

“Same, just necessities.”

“Looks like yer bakin’ or sumthin’ with all that flour,” he comments, nodding to it as I set it down amongst the other items.

“Well, I’m going to make brownies, so yeah it’s a necessity, but that’s nothing new.”

“Ah, so Becks has become a baker, has she now?” he inquires, filling his arms with items up and down the aisle, because of course he is. I nod, joining him by a box of premade mixes, watching as he debates over which brownie mix to buy.

“I literally just said two seconds ago that I’m making homemade brownies, and you’re buying a box mix of them! Homemade is always better!” I exclaim, then groan with a disapproving shake of my head. “Harold.”

“Boops,” he returns, a smile winding its way up his cheeks covered in a light layer of dark facial hair. Now, that’s new, and what’s not to like? “I don’t mess with bakin’, so yes, ‘m buyin’ a box o’ premade. Unless ya’d like t’ make me some?” he suggests, wiggling his eyebrows at me with an idea forming inside of my head.

“Maybe if you stop calling me Boops and Rebecca, I will one time.”

“Noted,” he responds, winking at me as he replaces the box on the shelf.

“Good boy.”

He continues to smile at me, and quickly I remember what it’s like to stare into this sunlight, and how it’s not so bad sometimes. It’s quite wonderful, actually. The buzzing inside of my chest grows when his finger nears my face again, and then brushes under my eye.

“I like seein’ yer birthmark when ya don’t cover it up, ‘s pretty, Becks,” he hums, tracing his thumb over it, tickling my skin. A small ‘thanks’ drops from my lips at his words, and the buzzing only intensifies as he stares back at me. In that moment, I swear I could do it and I almost try to until he turns away. I attempt to find comfort in assuring myself that I don’t want our theoretical first kiss to be in the middle of the supermarket, lest anybody join us in this aisle. “I think that’s all I needed t’day.”

Thoughts are building into words on my tongue until the ringing of my phone interrupts my plans. This is definitely not all that I needed today, per say. Lifting it towards my face, I see my dad’s smiling face waiting for me, reminding me I haven’t spoken to him in days amidst everything going on. He’s already called a few times and I wasn’t able to answer, and he’s probably starting to grow concerned. I also really need to tell him about the new job. He’ll be so happy, and I can only imagine the suggestive things he’ll say about Harry. Oh boy.  

“I should take this,” I announce, bringing my eyes back to his. He nods as he arrives back in front of his cart. “It was nice to see you and only one of you,” I snicker, alluding to the far too many drinks we consumed the other night.

“You too, Becks, it was nice runnin’ into ya. ‘ll try not t’ crash carts with ya tha next time,” he returns with a warm smile, coming towards me as he pushes his cart. The next time? Can you please not tease me like this, Harry? I want all of the grocery shopping trips with you, even if they’re only like this where I can’t have my arm hooked through yours. Maybe one time we’ll only need one cart, just maybe. He lifts an arm and squeezes mine on his way down the aisle. “Take care, bug, ‘ll see ya Friday.”

“Bye, Harry. Careful driving that thing!” I call out, and this time he doesn’t give me a dirty look when he looks back at me. Instead, he sends me that blinding smile of his I love so damn much. “And, I’ll be thinking of you this week, I know it’ll be a hard one.”

“Thanks, bug, I appreciate it,” he returns, winking at me before turning back around and rounding the corner, just as I press Accept on my phone.

“Hi, Dad,” I say, waiting to hear my dad’s comforting voice.

“Hey, Boops. How’s my favourite girl?” he asks, the warmth in his voice providing me with happiness, and stealing it away at the same time. God, I miss him sometimes, I realize inside my thoughts. As I still stare down the aisle, I miss another man too.

It seems I’m always missing these two every second of every day, and one of Harry’s hugs that I wish I’d stolen a few seconds ago.

+

As the numbers climb in front of my eyes, the last few days flash before them. Somehow, I’m amazed when the number seventeen appears before my eyes in a bright red font. The last week has dragged on at times, thoughts of Harry and standing in this very lift occupying my every thought. Checking my watch, I’m glad to see I’m early, just like I had planned.

The gunmetal doors part in front of me and I’m rewarded with the sight of Seventeen in all of its glory. The buzzing returns in my chest, and so do the multitudes of butterflies in my gut as I look around. It does and doesn’t look the same as before, but it smells the same, and in some ways it sounds the same. The Cubiclers are gone and now more offices line the walls, and a certain somebody sits inside of one this very instant. The very same person I get to spend the entire day with, and it’s the first of oh so many. I take a long look around, admiring the gleaming tiled floors and the dark wooden walls, a new cream chandelier or two dotting the ceiling. God, that remodel must not have been cheap, I think silently, and soon wonder if a certain somebody’s father in construction had anything to do with it.

I almost expect to see him round one of the corners of the large floor dedicated to the firm, but I don’t, and I’m unsure of how I feel about it. It’s all washed away when I find the door I’ve been looking for, and it’s open.

“Hey, stranger,” I announce, leaning against the door frame with a cheeky grin plastered across my face. “Look at you with the fancy new office all to yourself.”

Their tousled head of sandy hair lifts from their computer screen, and I watch his eyes change almost entirely. My name falls from his lips as he stands up and crosses the room to me, enveloping me in a hug.

“What are you doing here? Does Harry know you’re here?”

“Yeah, he knows,” I smile against Asher’s shoulder, pulling away after a moment of being surrounded by his crisp cologne. “I work with him uh soon - I got the associate job, and he’s my mentor.”

Again, the look on his face changes in a blink, and astonishment paints him in stripes. A nervous laugh falls from his lips as he grips my shoulders and clucks his tongue in disbelief.

“You’re always good with the surprises, aren’t you?” Asher replies and I nod, waiting for him to say more. “Becky, t-this is what you want?”

“Yeah, it’s what I want. He’s already been so kind to me, and we’ve been talking a lot. He picked me over everybody else, Ash!” I respond, watching the words register with him as he nods the slightest. “I’m not going to let him get away this time.”

“As long as you’re happy, and he’s good to you,” he insists, pointing a stern finger at me dotted with shiny blonde hairs.

“Yes, he’s already being good to me, Ash. We went out for dinner and drinks that we meant to do this summer, and things are already looking up.”

“Good, good. That’s already progress, Becky,” he hums, and I mumble a brief agreement. “But still, what are you doing here now?”

“Oh, I have my orientation with him today, but I don’t start officially until the twenty-eighth, after I finish my job at the courts,” I reply, and he nods a little harder this time, biting on his thumb.

“I see, it’s all making some sense now, thank God. So, when are you going to ask him on a date?”

“Ash!” I exclaim, following him further into his plain looking office where he sits on the corner of his desk. He crosses his arms over the ochre button down showing a white t-shirt underneath. “It’s not even my first day of work yet!”

“So? You’re wasting precious time!” he argues, his loud chuckle soon stealing away his words. I groan as my eyes roll into the back of my head, soon pushing up the sleeve of my dark violet blazer to find my brown leather watch.

“Yeah, sitting here arguing with you,” I giggle, returning my eyes to his summer blues.

“No, you’re right, because you could be talking to him right now. You know, flirting with him and asking him on a date.”

“Ash, stop!” I laugh, turning to walk away, but I stop when I reach his door. “I like the new office by the way, I’m happy they finally made you head of I.T. I’m really happy for you,” I say softly pointing to the words on his door, hanging onto the handle as he meets my eyes softly.

“Thanks, Becky, I appreciate it. It was about time Bitchie Trishie retired anyways, fuck was she old.”

“Ditto,” I smile and he returns it right away. “I’m really happy to be back.”

“I’m happy you are too, and I’m sure Harry is as well. You should get going, you don’t want to make a bad uh, second impression,” he notes, shooing me away with his hand.

We say our goodbyes and I return to the hallway, straightening my unbuttoned blazer over my long slacks the same color for probably the twentieth time this morning. What feels like for the fiftieth time, I smooth down the chiffon black blouse tucked in underneath, hoping I ironed out every single wrinkle. Skye’s words from his morning when we said goodbye come back to me with a warm smile.

“Ree, if he doesn’t realize what he’s been missing the second he sees you in that outfit, I’m going to be very disappointed in him,” she mused, shaking her head with pursed lips and arms crossed over her chest as I laughed nervously.

My black pumps echo with every step I take on the immaculate floors, soon finding Amelia at the front desk who I wave at, not bothering to check in again. Asher’s comment and its ambiguity comes to mind as I take a right through the lobby. What did he mean that he’s sure Harry is happy I’m back, too? Since when do Asher and Harry talk, or when have they ever spoken to each other with more than three words? Does he know something that I don’t know?

I don’t get another second to think about it, because soon I turn down the hallway. His hallway. The nerves of anticipation and excitement come over me as a smile grows hastily on my lips. I’ve been waiting for this moment for longer than I think I know, probably months, or even years. It’s hard to believe that the last time I was in his office, it was two years ago. The thought appears with a sting when I remember the last time I was in his office, because of him walking in on Amber well, assaulting me. A moment that I ended when I walked away from him, and here I am walking back to him, and I couldn’t be happier.

Oh, how the tables have turned.

I see his door first, and how it’s ajar, letting a section of his office peek through. Then, I hear the Paul McCartney song escaping from his office, followed by his humming. The humming doesn’t match the song oddly enough, but it transports me back to the hospital in Madley when I was wrapped in his arms. It’s the same song he was humming then that I still can’t figure out. God, those kinds of things bug me.

I see him first, and I couldn’t be more grateful for that, because I get a few extra seconds to admire him. It allows me to remember the way he absently twirls a piece of hair around his finger when he’s lost in a thought, how he always crosses his legs at the ankles under his desk bobbing a foot to the music, and just how incredible he always manages to look in a suit. A pastel teal number hugs his trim body with a cream button up underneath, giving me a peek at his thick chest hair underneath. Oh, I could just eat him up. If only.

Swallowing, I take the time for a silent deep breath before rapping my knuckle against the cold glass of his door with nervous lips, “Good morning, boss.”

His head flies up and I think I’ve scared him almost, but the happiness that consumes his face is instantaneous and contagious as ever. It spreads across his flushed skin until my favorite little things about his smile appear before my eyes, making this all the more real. The perfect little curls falling over his forehead make it all the worse, and the better.

“Mornin’. Are ya ready t’ get started, Ms. Holte?”

“Yes, I’ve never been more ready,” I reply, the anxiousness abating as he stands from his chair.

“Great, then let’s get started with yer official orientation as a lawyer fer Styles and Lawson,” he announces, firmness playing in his words until they end with sunshine dancing across them, his footsteps finding their way to me. “Y’know, ‘ve been waitin’ a long time fer this day, Becks, too long.”

Me too, Harry. I’ve been waiting for what feels like forever for this new beginning.

[mitchintille]

2021 Mock Draft 1.0

Super Bowl 55 is just a few days away, which means draft season is looming in the rearview mirror. In a class that is expected to produce an abundance of offensive talent, several teams could benefit from this year’s crop. With a reported possibility of 18 teams looking for a change at the quarterback position, there is quite a bit of ambiguity as we approach the draft, and this year could shape up to be one of the wildest drafts we’ve seen in recent memory. Without further ado, here are my early first round predictions for the 2021 NFL draft....

1. Jacksonville Jaguars: Trevor Lawrence, QB, Clemson

From the moment he set foot on campus his freshman season, Lawrence has always has shown the capabilities of being a future NFL star. He took no time bursting onto the scene. After a dazzling freshman season, in which he lead the Tigers to a title in blowout fashion over an absolutely loaded Alabama team, he followed it up with two more trips to the playoffs, including another trip to the title game.

The former No.1 overall recruit in the country offers everything one could wish for in a franchise quarterback.  He is a gifted, natural thrower of the football who is wise beyond his years at the position. Even new head coach Urban Meyer feels that he has the potential to be the best QB ever. Jaguars fans, your savior has come. Rejoice. 

2. Houston Texans: Zach Wilson, QB, BYU

Houston receives: 2nd overall pick (2021), 23rd overall pick (2021), 3rd round pick (2021), 1st round pick (2022), 4th round pick (2022)

New York receives: Deshaun Watson, 6th round pick (2022)

Let’s get weird. Deshaun Watson being traded has reached inevitability status, and the Jets are stockpiled with draft picks over the next few years. It has been rumored that Watson would prefer to play for the Jets under the tutelage of new head coach Robert Saleh. The Jets have the firepower to make this pick happen, and in this scenario they pull off the mega deal and get their guy. So where does that leave Houston?

 They luck into a talented, natural thrower of the football, with a very clean feel for the pocket. He has a rocket arm, and is particularly impressive when asked to go off script. The Texans rebuild will undoubtedly be a long one, but with Wilson, they have a fresh face of the franchise moving forward, and will look to continue adding more weapons around him to set him up for success.  

3. San Francisco 49ers: Justin Fields, QB, Ohio State

San Francisco receives: 3rd overall pick (2021), 5th round pick (2022)

Miami receives: 12th overall pick (2021), 43rd overall pick (2021), 1st round pick (2022), 3rd round pick (2022), 7th round pick (2022)

Between the Rams’ recent trade for Matthew Stafford, and Kyle Shanahan remaining noncommittal on Jimmy Garoppolo for the foreseeable future, it wouldn’t shock me to see John Lynch be aggressive and try to nab their QB of the future. 

Fields put up gaudy numbers in his first year as a starter, posting an absurd 51-3 TD/INT ratio. He showed a bit of regression in a COVID-shortened year two, but still displayed all of the tools you’d hope to see when searching for a franchise QB. 

Finding a way to get Jimmy G’s lucrative contract off the books, and adding a talented player like Fields would be a win-win for an organization whom I feel would GREATLY benefit from a changing of the guard under center. 

4. Atlanta Falcons: Trey Lance, QB, North Dakota State 

With the arrival of new head coach Arthur Smith, it is time for a rebrand in Atlanta. Matt Ryan is expected to make over $40m a season for the next two years, and while he is certainly not the main issue with this team, the Falcons need to move in a new direction. 

Lance is perhaps the most polarizing player in this year’s class. Similar to Fields, he too posted video game like numbers in his first year at the helm. The Minnesota product threw for 28 TD’s, while posting another 14 on the ground. He also didn’t throw an interception all season. He possess all of the physical tools that NFL teams salivate over, and while questions will remain in regards to the inferior competition he’s been exposed to over his career, the opportunity to sit and learn from Matt Ryan could serve both himself and the Falcons some good.

5. Cincinnati Bengals: Penei Sewell, OT, Oregon

If Sewell is on the board, he will be the pick for the Bengals. After breakout rookie quarterback Joe Burrow suffered a season-ending ACL tear, the sense of urgency to upgrade the offensive line should be at an all-time high for the Bengals.

 Sewell allowed just one sack over 1,376 career snaps and will spend the majority of his rookie season at age 20. He is a smooth mover with easy power, who is capable of playing on either side of the line. He is the exact type of stalwart that is needed for the Bengals to protect their QB of the future. 

6. Philadelphia Eagles: DeVonta Smith, WR, Alabama

I don’t know what to make of the Eagles’ current situation. They are in QB purgatory and have gaping holes riddled across their roster. With the recent hiring of Colts’ OC Nick Sirianni, I’d imagine adding offensive firepower would be at the top of his to-do list. Assuming they move forward with Jalen Hurts at QB, it is imperative to surround him with quality skill players. After drafting Jalen Reagor in the first round last year, they double dip this year and take the reigning Heisman Trophy winner.

 Smith is not the most conventional receiver, being that there aren’t too many 6′1, 175-lb receivers who have enjoyed prolonged success in the league, but Smith doesn’t care about your player profiles. Smith can make plays all over the field and beat you in a myriad of ways. He is a nuanced route runner with a seemingly natural feel for his position, and someone I can assume Sirianni will fall in love with as the draft process begins to heat up.

7. Detroit Lions: Jaylen Waddle, WR, Alabama 

If Lance were to have fallen to this spot, I’d have probably made him the selection. However, I’ll opt to give them a difference maker like Waddle.

 With Kenny Golladay’s impending departure and both Danny Amendola and Marvin Jones Jr. testing the open market, that WR room could get UGLY in a hurry. Waddle is essentially a supercharged version of his former teammate Henry Ruggs. He has legit 4.2 speed, and does a great job of tracking the deep ball. The Lions are desperate for speed on the perimeter, and Waddle would be an instant upgrade to what they have now. He’s a true, top-10 talent assuming he manages to stay healthy.

8. Carolina Panthers: Ja’marr Chase, WR, LSU

Now just hear me out on this. Curtis Samuel is approaching free agency and will likely be headed elsewhere. Aside from DJ Moore and Robby Anderson, the cupboard is bare. Chase put up record-setting numbers in his only year under current Panthers OC Joe Brady when they were at LSU, so a reunion would only be right.

 Chase is perhaps the best player in the entire class regardless of position. He is a physical route-runner who attacks the catch point with ease, and his RAC ability might be his best trait. He is very reminiscent of Moore, and pairing those two along with Anderson’s deep speed could perhaps create the most dangerous receiving trio in the NFL.

9. Denver Broncos: Caleb Farley, CB, Virginia Tech

After an heavy offensive draft last year, the Broncos buck the trend and refocus on rebuilding their defense. Farley’s size and athleticism are a perfect fit in Vic Fangio’s versatile defensive scheme. I believe Farley has the potential to be a star in this league very quickly. 

10. Dallas Cowboys: Rashawn Slater, OT, Northwestern

After wrestling back and forth with myself on this pick, the Cowboys settle on Slater. The once elite Cowboys offensive line has suddenly deteriorated into mediocrity. With both Tyron Smith and La’el Collins returning from injuries, Slater can serve as an insurance policy at either position, or kick him inside if need be. 

His versatility and strong lower half are both commendable traits that should allow him to see a long career in the NFL.

11. New York Giants: Patrick Surtain II, CB, Alabama 

Truthfully, this might be the most unpredictable pick in the first round. Dave Gettleman is tricky, but recently he has invested into the secondary quite a bit. After signing James Bradberry to a pricy extension last off-season, they also invested a pick into Xavier McKinney, as well as the addition of guys like Logan Ryan and Jabrill Peppers.

With Surtain, he brings a combo of length and savvy to the position, and would serve as the Giants’ other outside corner opposite of Bradberry.

12. Miami Dolphins: Kyle Pitts, TE, Florida

San Francisco receives: 3rd overall pick (2021), 5th round pick (2022)

Miami receives: 12th overall pick (2021), 43rd overall pick (2021), 1st round pick (2022), 3rd round pick (2022), 7th round pick (2022)

Yes, I’m highly aware that Mike Gesicki exists. But hear me out on this one, Pitts is more than just your standard “tight end” prospect. If it weren’t for a TE listed next to his position, I’d say that he’s the second best receiver in the draft. 

He is nearly impossible to match up against. He’s too fast for linebackers and too physical for corners. He’s shown the capability to play in the slot, flexed out wide, or with his hand in the dirt. Pairing him and Gesicki together will give Tua Tagovailoa (assuming he remains their guy moving forward), a plethora of weapons at his disposal.

13. Los Angeles Chargers: Christian Darrisaw, OT, Virginia Tech

Keeping Justin Herbert clean and protected should be the top priority heading into the offseason for Tom Telesco. After a breakout rookie season, it seems the Chargers struck a goldmine in Herbert. Being that the Chargers haven’t had a decent offensive line in years, a trip out west would make sense for Darrisaw. 

The Virginia Tech product is a very fluid mover, whose length and quickness allow him to reach the second level with ease as a run blocker. He will be an instant upgrade to their run game, and has the maturity to protect Herbert’s blindside from day one in LA. 

14. Minnesota Vikings: Gregory Rousseau, EDGE, Miami

After the loss of Everson Griffen to free agency, and Danielle Hunter missing most of the 2020 season due to a back injury, the Vikings should be looking to rebuild their pass rush. Mike Zimmer seems to have a knack for high-ceiling pass rushers with athletic upside. Rousseau fits the bill.

 The Florida native saw his star shine after a dazzling sophomore season, racking up an impressive 15.5 sacks. Rousseau has easy power off the edge. While he is still a bit raw from a technician standpoint, his natural power and length will be a nightmare for tackles to deal with from day one. If he can mature his game, he has the potential to be one of the most productive edge rushers in the league in due time. 

15. New England Patriots: Micah Parsons, EDGE, Penn State

After some recent concerns over Parsons’ character, he sees his stock slide and he falls into the lap of Bill Belichick. After being used in several different spots at Penn State,

 Parsons projects best as an EDGE, but has the necessary tools to develop his skills over time. Belichick has a fetish for hybrid linebackers that can rush the passer, and pairing the two together would do wonders for his development over time.

16. Arizona Cardinals: Jaycee Horn, CB, South Carolina

After adding Matthew Stafford to the division, and the Niners looking to upgrade at the quarterback position, it is time for the Cardinals to get better in the secondary. Quickly.

 Horn is an excellent press corner, with an alpha-dog type mentality that should fit in well in the Cardinals’ back end. He does have a tendency to be too grabby and aggressive at times, and his lack of size will hurt him against bigger receivers. He is not a perfect corner prospect, but the Cardinals don’t have much of a choice here. 

17. Las Vegas Raiders: Jaelan Phillips, EDGE, Miami 

Truthfully, I have no idea what to predict here. The front office is an absolute mess, and have proven themselves to be incompetent when it comes to drafting. After missing badly on Clelin Ferrell a few years ago, they have a chance to redeem themselves with the selection of Phillips. 

The former number one overall recruit had a late start to his career, after suffering several injuries and at one point declaring himself medically retired. After transferring to Miami from UCLA, Phillips began to improve his game, and vaulted himself into first round considerations after a breakout 2020 campaign. His injury history may force him to fall, but his combination of size, speed, and motor is very exciting, and he may be the exact type of player Mike Mayock falls in love with.

18. Miami Dolphins: Zaven Collins, LB, Tulsa

Brian Flores is one of the few Belichick proteges recently that has found success as a head coach. Much like Belichick, Flores places a large emphasis on versatility, particularly on the defensive side of the ball. This is why Collins would be a perfect fit on day one. 

Collins was truly a jack-of-all-trades in his time at Tulsa. He was one of the best players in all of college football last season, and did so in a number of ways. He can rush the passer, cover a runningback out of the backfield. Think D’onta Hightower type role for Collins if he were to head to south beach.

19. Washington Football Team: Mac Jones, QB, Alabama

With the trend in the NFL heading towards a youth movement at QB, it wouldn’t shock me to see Washington fall in love with Jones.

Although he’s not the most dynamic passer, Jones is a solid athlete with an incredibly comfortable feel for the game. He is a great processor with plus accuracy, and has shown impressive flashes of improvisation. He may not have a very high ceiling moving forward, but I can him instantly making that team better and elevating them into playoff contention on a year-to-year basis.

20. Chicago Bears: Rashod Bateman, WR, Minnesota

With Allen Robinson likely headed elsewhere in free agency and Anthony Miller’s slow start, the time is now to add playmakers on the offensive side of the ball. Insert Bateman.

One of the most forgotten men in the whole class, Bateman is silky smooth in everything he does, and will be the most physical WR on any field he steps on. He eats up intermediate routes, and is capable of being a vertical threat. His game reminds me a ton of guys like Keenan Allen and Michael Thomas, not the most physically gifted guys, but masters of their craft and play to their strengths.

Whether or not the Bears decide to move forward with Mitchell Trubisky at QB or not, it is imperative to give the man under center some more feasible options to work with in the passing game.

21. Indianapolis Colts: Kwity Paye, EDGE, Michigan

While the temptation was high to take a receiver here, I opted for the highly athletic EDGE with limitless upside.

Not having a combine will prove to affect Paye’s stock, as he was expected to test through the roof at his position. Once listed as one of Bruce Feldman’s “freaks”, Paye finally applied his athleticism to the field in 2020. He is very reliant on his natural power and speed, and has yet to develop any consistent counter moves. If developed properly, his size/speed combo alongside Deforest Buckner could prove to be deadly for an already improving defense.

22. Tennessee Titans: Azeez Ojulari, EDGE, Georgia

Being that the Jadeveon Clowney acquisition backfired on them, the Titans are still in search of a consistent pass rush opposite of Harold Landry.

Ojulari is young and lacks experience. But when his motor gets going, he could be the most explosive rusher in the class. He’d be perfect in their 3-4 defense, and has the potential to be a good player in space as he gains more experience. 

23. New York Jets: Joseph Ossai, EDGE, Texas

One of the staples of a Robert Saleh defense is consistent pressure off the edge. The Jets lack any and all types of pass rush at the moment, and Ossai’s intriguing upside in that defense could see him turn out to be a very productive player.

24. Pittsburgh Steelers: Liam Eichenberg, OT, Notre Dame

Man, Notre Dame just pumps them out, don’t they? With GM Kevin Colbert’s affinity for drafting players from big name schools, Eichenberg becomes the most recent, NFL product of the offensive line factory that is Notre Dame.

Much like any of the Notre Dame linemen of the past, Eichenberg is techincally sound in everything he does. He may not be athletic enough to play left tackle, but is a plug and play right tackle from day one.

25. Jacksonville Jaguars: Samuel Cosmi, OT, Texas

Although the temptation would be to select a receiver here, the Jags have $100m in cap space to work with, which can be spent on one of the receivers in what is expected to be an impressive free agency class. 

Cosmi may be a little undersized, but is very athletic and light on his feet for the position. If he can bulk up and maintain his athleticism, I can see him being the Jaguars’ left tackle for the next decade. 

26. Cleveland Browns: Jeremiah Owusu-Koramoah, LB, Notre Dame

A surprising slide leaves Cleveland with one of the most gifted players in the draft. 

JOK is a heat-seeking missile, who showed very impressive flashes in coverage. He is the prototypical, modern-day NFL linebacker through and through.

27. Baltimore Ravens: Kadarius Toney, WR, Florida

Eric Decosta recently hinted at his lust for the dynamic Florida receiver. Toney was used in several different ways over the course of his career, but really seemed to find himself as a slot receiver in 2020.

On a team desperate for playmakers on offense, Toney would fit like a glove on that intermediate/short game offensive scheme. Toney is a menace with the ball in his hands. He has incredible contact balance and vision. If he continues to progress as a receiver, he would be a very nice addition. 

28. New Orleans Saints: Christian Barmore, IDL, Alabama

In what looks to be a fairly uninspiring IDL class, Barmore’s stock rose in his first season as a starter. The Philly native has clubs for hands, and he proved himself to be un-blockable down the stretch. Ohio State had no answer for him in the national championship game, and he seems to only be sratching the surface of what he can become.

In this case, the Saints don’t reach for a QB and draft the best player on the board, which just so happens to be Barmore. 

29. Green Bay Packers: Dyami Brown, WR, North Carolina

The Packers failure to address the receiver position came full circle this season. After losing their second consecutive NFC Championship, the lack of talent at WR cost them in the end. Enter Dyami Brown, one of the best kept secrets in the entire draft. 

Brown is a budding star. Only listed at 6′1, 185-lb, Brown consistently plays larger than his frame. He is perhaps the best vertical threat in the entire draft. Brown displays freakish ball tracking skills, along with 4.3 speed. Pairing him with Rodgers could be the missing piece that gets them over the hump moving forward, and would show that the organization is dedicated to Rodgers as their guy until he retires. 

30. Buffalo Bills: Nick Bolton, LB, Missouri 

With Matt Milano’s future with the Bills in question, it would not surprise me to see them cut bait and go after the athletic and physical SEC backer.

Bolton is a bit undersized for the position, so pairing him with Tremaine Edmunds would be the perfect complement. He great sideline to sideline speed, and will be an immediate upgrade over Milano from an athletic standpoint.

31. Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Alex Leatherwood, OT, Alabama

With Donovan Smith set to become a free agent, I’d imagine the Bucs will look to replace him this off-season.

Leatherwood was a two-year starter at left tackle, but is capable of playing on the interior as well. Even if the Bucs were to bring Smith back, having a depth piece to the quality of Leatherwood could serve vital for a team who is destined ti make a run until Tom Brady’s retirement.

32. Kansas City Chiefs: Alijah Vera-Tucker, iOL, USC

An interesting storyline that has gotten lost in the mix of guys like Patrick Mahomes, Tyreek Hill, and Travis Kelce, the Chiefs have battled several injuries along the offensive line. They’re likely to play 3-4 backups in the Super Bowl this Sunday. 

Although the production remains elite and ultimately the deteriorating health on the line hasn’t bitten them yet, it is not a sustainable way to move forward. 

Vera-Tucker is a highly refined player, who has experience playing at any spot on the line. Much like the Bucs, adding quality depth and talent among the offensive line to protect your franchise should never be a move that is scrutinized.

[polygamyff]

61. Part 2

Reign is being a little clingy with me, I think she feels I am going to ditch her which I will be soon because mommy needs to some time to herself and have some fun “come on baby, what is wrong?” Reign hid her face in the crook of my neck “ok, ok” she is just being silly now “girl! This place is like a whole ass apartment!!!” Jacob shouted as he entered the room first, walking into the room “oh this is nice. Well this is the best room here, apparently they don’t actually have bad rooms. They are all generally like this” this is penthouse “hello Miss Romano, I am Pierce” I gasped, my eyes all wide eyed “I am your butler, if you need me then please tell me. I have the champagne ready and also non-alcoholic for you” he bowed his head “oh my god, he called you Miss Romano?” Leon said “that is so cute, awwww” Maurice is the cutest, I love him so much “thank you Pierce, I will pass on the alcohol” smiling at him “ohhh chile, give me that flute” my auntie spat, walking into the room looking around “I am shook, this place is beautiful” Asia said, I am in awe “look at the balloons, he really throwing a little party for you too. Where do I find a man like him” sitting down laughing “he is unique, he didn’t want me to have a party but here he is setting the room for a party” sitting back on the couch “you’re breaking mommy’ back, I got a backache baby” Reign is so sad for no reason too, moving Reign back and on my lap, lifting her head up with my hands “mommy loves you what is wrong?” she smiled, she is just being silly “let’s ring your dad before he gets angry that I didn’t let him know about arriving, mom. Do you have my bag please, and also my medication. My back is killing me” the butler made his way over “We can get out a physio to massage your back?” I am just sat here staring in shock “say yes Robbie, you have a long day tomorrow “ok, please. Thank you” I didn’t expect that “please tell me anything you need because I can make it happen for you” Gloria took another drink, she is something else that woman “Thank you Pierce” my mom passed me my mobile “what is it?” Reign is really going to try and work my nerve today, she doesn’t like me to speak to anyone “I should have left you with your dad to be honest” unlocking my phone “she is going to play up ain’t she?” my mom said “probably, try and ask for her and see if she goes to you” pressing my phone to my ear calling Maurice “Reign, shall we go for a little walk. Come on” my mom picked Reign from my lap “Bonita, I have been waiting. You got there I am guessing?” smiling at just the sound of his voice “I did baby, thank you for the room. Miss Romano too? Mhmm, you made me so happy. And the room is fit to be partied in” he chuckled down the phone “well I know you would like to turn up, why not” seeing my mother coming back with a crying Reign “I should have left Reign with you, she is in that mood. It’s gran gran, don’t be like that” my mom looks over it too “ok, you talk to your dad” let Maurice deal with her, putting him on speakerphone “you’re on speakerphone before you like to say something stupid” that would be him all over.

Reign doesn’t want to speak but won’t let me talk to him “you want Lenny to bring her here, I can take care of her” I cooed out “you are too cute baby but no, she will get over it. I know she will” Reign hit the phone from my hand for the third time “thank you Reign-Texas” Leon picked it up “I come baring a balloon, this is all for you Reign. Oh, wow look” taking my phone from him “I think you may be onto something Leon, keep going” taking my phone off speakerphone “anyways, she will be ok. What are you thinking of doing, I feel bad now. I didn’t like do what you did for me” I am so useless “literally just sit and watch a movie in this home with Rich and Matt, going for a meal and that is it. I am boring Robyn, but I prefer it. I done did it all, I don’t need it. Just heads up, my sister has landed also, with my mother. But she won’t be coming near you, my sister said she will behave, and then I said what about my dad, Nalah said dad will shut his damn mouth. I said it to him, Nalah is taking responsibility, I love you. I can’t wait to see you in your dress, and also that shit is on my dad’ dime. He paying for everything, I just told them what to do” so his mother will be here, I don’t know what to feel about that but I am not going to say anything he is going to be sober this time around “that is fine, least you told me now. I can’t wait to see you waiting for me and sweating as you keep saying. I am nervous and I am getting stared at, you need to go now. But if you do need me, call me. Bye” I could talk to him all day, Maurice laughed out “I got you, bye” disconnecting the call with the biggest smile on my face.

Leon’ acting an idiot has helped, Reign is letting me live and is chasing balloons instead “I did say to Jacob and Leon, they need to adopt. Look how good they are with her” Asia sat next to me on the couch “I think knowing my friend, he will not want any kid and just take mine so he can give it back. He likes freedom but Jacob, he seems to be more loving. They can take the kids when they want, my god. It will be a good break” I laughed “I am like I want another baby but I regret it, back pains before my damn wedding” rolling my eyes “girl, that physio about to have your back straight, you will be ok. You must be extremely nervous about tomorrow; I can’t actually see myself in a wedding dress. I mean I can’t even see my ass married in the first place” I wish I could drink; I am jealous right now “I have to admit that I am nervous, I didn’t want marriage or a baby actually. I have so much going for me, but my world has taken a whole different road and I am kind of stuck on what to do, my job is the best” Asia gasped “you’re a whole surgeon at your age! I get what you mean, that is hard for you but if it were me I wouldn’t work in no ghetto hospital for my own safety. It would be some private rich hospital type; you have to think of you. You’re not just Robyn from the block” Asia and I both laughed “but you’re known now, and people won’t like that. I think keep it but change that shit, I personally would see you modelling, sorry not sorry. You’re too beautiful to not be” Asia has a point.

Reign has only left this room because of Leon so he is missing “don’t you think this room is less dramatic now he gone” I told the butler to rest, I thought that we needed our own little space and we don’t need him for now “how your back feeling girl, that whit man has some huge muscles too” grabbing the glass from the side “is this the mocktail the butler bought before he left?” I questioned, Jacob and Asia both nodded “cool and yes, he was so good. His hands worked well. He has way bigger hands then my husband to be” walking around the bar “I saw him and was like, let me switch him for Leon” I busted out laughing “he was nice about it all too, I said I am pregnant and getting pains, he was like take off your top and I had to add on the first meet? So he laughed, but I didn’t take my top off I just lifted it so he can reach my back and then the rest is history” Jacob yelped out “oh my god, I bet it felt so good” placing my glass on the table “it was, my back is not hurting anymore. Can Leon hurry the fuck up so we can start playing games already. You know what I am so happy my circle is small” hearing a knock at the door, getting up from the couch but the butler came out of nowhere “I will get it for you” he said, I shrugged sitting back “Nalah is here!” he announces, getting back up. Let me see here “Robyn!” she yelped out before hugging me “I am so glad you came out” Nalah cooed out.

These niggas got me sat here thinking mad hard on things to put in the hat but I did it “so now we take it in turns to pull come confessions out, if we get it right then you don’t win shit. Maybe just a side eye but I hope you all have been truth. So because it is Robyn’ wedding day she can go first” Jacob placed the hat on my lap “you know what” placing my drink on the table “I will know if it is about Leon so let’s see” placing my hand in the hat “she is right” Leon pointed at me “she will know if it is me” picking a piece of paper out “whew chile, I am excited” opening the paper, I instantly frowned seeing the word funeral “ok this is interesting and I am judging, so which one of you nasty asses had sex at their granddaddy funeral?” looking at them all, they all busted out laughing “wooo, who sinned oh my god. At a whole church? What!!” Leon screamed out; I am trying to figure out who the hell did it “ok, ok calm down. Robyn please decide who you think” looking at everyone as Jacob tried to calm them down “uhhh, I think it’s Asia. She seems a little too calm, that sneaky little laugh” Asia gasped “oh my god, seriously? I am not that bad” squinting my eyes at Jacob “the person that had sex at their grandparent’s funeral, raise your hand. You’re getting judged” I mean luckily there isn’t a whole room of us “me” hearing a tiny shameful voice next to me “Nalah!” we all shouted in unison in utter shock “I mean I didn’t like my granddaddy so who cares, it was good dick” I am shook “sis, at a whole ass fucking church!” Jacob spat “god blessed me with some good dick on the day, and he was a family friend” Nalah got me shook “you dark fucking horse, I cannot!” I am shocked as fuck.

I feel like I haven’t lived in that manner, mine seems all minor and boring “Lost virginity in the back of a car, boring Robyn” Leon looked at me which made everyone laugh, putting a finger up at him “ok, that is cute though. Robyn is good. She ain’t sinned like us, we going to hell” Asia out here helping me “thank you Asia, you all are bad. You all are going to hell” Nalah hit my arm lightly “girl, you have an automatic hell card marrying into our family. But honestly, I think I Am the worst. But the dick was good” Nalah is out here carrying it on, pushing Nalah laughing “let’s forget this, oh my god. Nalah got me weak as fuck” this little secret of hers was unexpected “ok, so can I just say something before I get drunk” Leon got up from the floor “listen bitches, hear me out!” he shouted, looking up at him “I just want to say, my beautiful best friend. I am so happy for you, like I know you have heard this many of times, but you are the most humble, loving friend. Right from when I met you, I mean we had Tiffany yes, let’s forget her but it was you. Tiffany wasn’t there for the friendship, and also the men weren’t there for her either but that is a whole ass different story. But I just want to say how much I love Robyn, I am ever so overprotective over her and to see she now has another man that can do that, I can rest easy because you stressed me out girl. The amount of times I played boyfriend” I laughed at Leon “girl, when those men would say I look gay I can’t be with you. Let’s just say, Robyn got soft lips. But we been through it, I just want to make it known that I am your biggest fan, I adore you so much and I thank you. Thank you for showing me love, a family. A home with you” Leon got me emotional “this is about you and I am so happy for you, you deserve it. To my friend Robyn” Leon raised his glass, but I got up to hug him “I love you Leon, thank you for everything” Leon is an emotional mess right now.

I opened my eyes and Robyn is the first thing I thought of, I wonder if she will do the same, today is going to be one of the best days of my life. I am marrying the love of my life and I am awake extra early, extra early because I needed time to just lay here and think of Robyn and the fact I have an empty bed without Robyn here with me. I could have married Robyn in Vegas without anyone around, I just love her so much and I miss her. Reaching over for my phone, the phone screen lit up and there is really nothing on here because there is no Robyn messaging me, she really going through with this but today is the day. Resting my phone against my chest “Maurice! Are you awake!?” Rich said outside the bedroom door “I am Rich, thanks though” moving onto my side, I am so excited. I didn’t really sleep, I kind of dropped off but then my alarm went off. I am going to be so emotional seeing her “today is the day big man, no more single life!” Rich is still out there “I know, I am happy about that though” I grinned “I would be too, see you downstairs” he right, I mean who wouldn’t want to marry Robyn.

[lovemesomesurveys]

Ready to answer 151 Questions? 1. When was the last time you swam in a pool? Like 6/7 years ago. 2. Do you like to party? My idea of a party is a small get together with friends just chillin’ with food and music. Maybe play some boardgames. Just super laid back. Crazy party scenes with a shitload of people I don’t even know is not my thing at all. That all being said, I haven’t been to a party in like 3 years. 3. If your ex suddenly kissed you right now, what would you do? I can’t even imagine a scenario where that would happen now. We haven’t talked or seen each other in almost 5 years. For that to happen, that would mean we were talking and hanging out again and yeah, don’t see that happening. Plus, SO much has changed for the both of us. Our ship sailed a longggg time ago. 4. Are you a virgin? Yes. 5. What are your parents views on your relationships? Ty and I never dated, but my parents really liked him. My mom definitely thought something was going on and she was rooting for us, ha. 

6. If you ran into your current boyfriend/crush in 10 years, would you marry them? I don’t have a boyfriend or a crush right now. But also, I wouldn’t just marry someone I bumped into 10 years later. Like, a LOT would have changed in that amount of time. Just because I dated or was interested in someone doesn’t mean things would be the same seeing each other that many years later. Would the feelings come back? Would we still vibe? What are we doing in our life at that time? Are we both single? 7. Is your best friend dating anyone?  My mom has been with my dad for over 30 years. 8. Describe the shirt you’re wearing? It’s a tie-shirt with pastel colors.  9. Do people who wear Hollister and Abrerbrombie every day bother you? I really don’t care. 10. Could you go out in public without wearing make-up? I’ve been doing that for the past few years. To think that there was a time I would have never done that... 11. What is one feature that you don’t like? On me? I mean, everything, but my smile/teeth for one. 12. Would people describe you as happy? No. 13. Are you single? Yep. 14. Does it bother you that pretty much every survey you take asks if you’re single? Yes or questions about relationships. 15. Do you have Tumblr? Duhhh.

16. What about Xanga? Aww, RIP Xanga.  17. Have you ever babysat before? Yeah, my younger brother and a couple of my cousins when they were kids.  18. Is there a teacher who you absolutely hate?  I had two awful math professors in community college. Like, they were horrible. 19. Ever shopped at Sephora? Yeah. 20. If your current boyfriend/crush suddenly moved away, what would you do?  21. Do you have any university plans? I graduated with my BA five years ago. I’m not going any further. 22. If your best friend revealed she was a homosexual, what would you do? I mean, it would definitely come as a huge shock if my mom came out now. Of course it wouldn’t change anything between us, but things would be different for awhile. Like, it would take time to get used to a new normal, one where she’s not with my dad who she’s been with for over 30 years and one where she’s with a woman.  23. What are your views on sex? Be safe. If you’re an adult and it’s consensual then I don’t see an issue. 24. Do sexual questions bother you?  No. I just don’t have much to say on the matter. 25. Would you rather have sex with your boyfriend or break up? Wth. 26. Have you ever dreamed about your wedding?  Nope. 27. Does it bother you when people TYpe 1yk dis’?  Omg. I’m so glad I don’t see that anymore. That seemed to die when Myspace did. 28. Do you delete pictures of you and your exes off of Facebook? There’s still photos of Joseph and I. *shrug* 29. Would you ever date a friends Ex? No. 30. What’s the last book you read?  The Girl and the Hunt by AJ Rivers. 31. Ready for 10 simple questions? Sure. 32. What is your last name?  Stephanie. 33. What grade are you in? I graduated college 5 years ago, I’m done. 34. What school do you go to? 35. Summer, Fall, Winter or Spring? Fall and winter. 36. Favorite Color? Pastels, rose gold, yellow, coral, mint green. 37. Are your parents together? Yes. 38. Any siblings?  I have two brothers. 39. Favorite subject?  Psychology.

40. Least favorite subject?  Math. 41. Favorite song? I could never just choose one. 42. Okay. Simple questions are over. Happy?  I don’t care. 43. How many friends do you have on Facebook?  150ish. 44. Ever been requested by some old guy from another country? They weren’t old, but yeah I’ve had several requests from men from other countries.  45. Have you ever googled yourself? Yeah. 46. Have a Formspring? I used to. I suppose it still exists out there since I never deleted it. I haven’t been on there in several years, though. 47. You’re offered free tickets to a Justin Bieber concert. What do you do? Probably decline the offer. I actually do like both his current and previous album, but I don’t know if I’d want to go to his concert. *shrug* I also don’t know anyone who would go with me and I wouldn’t go alone. 48. Would you rather spend the day at an amusement park or a water park? Amusement park. I don’t do water slides and whatnot.  49. Been to Disney world?  Nope, but I’d love to go. I’ve been to Disneyland several times, though. 50. If someone posts their status “9 Inches :(” do you know what they mean? Sounds like one of those things where people post a random status from a list of things that will likely get people’s attention and whoever comments on it is privately sent said list of thing and they then choose something to post as their status and so on. That was a popular game thing on Facebook years ago. 51. Ever had a boyfriend?  Yes.

52. Ever had a huge crush on someone who still doesn’t know? I’ve had crushes on guys who never knew, but the really serious ones (there were 5) all knew. 53. Have you done something in the last week that you regret?  Yes. 54. Ever drank alcohol?  Yeah. I drank in my early 20s until I was 24. 55. Know anyone who’s currently doing drugs? Yeah. 56. Ever watched The Hills?  Yeah, the OG one and the reboot that came out last year. 57. What about Jersey Shore? No, I never got into that one. 58. Ever called someone a slut?  I’ve said that jokingly to friends. 59. What do you think of short shorts? I don’t wear them. Or any length of shorts.  60. Does it bother you if people swear around you? No. I think it’s funny because my dad is still weird about cussing in front of me and so is our family friend. She always apologizes to me if she does it.  61. Have you ever gotten an A in a subject? I mostly got A’s and B’s throughout school with some C’s because of stupid math. 62. What about a B?  ^^^ 63. And a C? ^^^ 64. How about a D? No. 65. Ever skived? What’s that? 66. Would you consider yourself popular and outcast or somewhere in the middle? I’d say I was the outcast. I mean, I had some friends, but I really just didn’t stand out or fit in.  67. Are most of your friends older or younger than you? My friends were my age or a year younger. Ty was the only one who was older than me (just by a year). 68. Ever been stabbed in the back by a close friend? Yes. 69. Do you think it’s immature when people laugh at the number 69? I have my immature moments, too. That one doesn’t do it for me, though.  70. Ever watched porn? I’ve seen it, but it wasn’t for my viewing pleasure or anything. I just personally don’t get the appeal. 71. How many laws do you think you’ve broken in the past month?  I don’t think I’ve broken any. I don’t do anything or go anywhere, ha. 72. Do you wake up with an alarm clock? Yeah. I’d sleep later than 3PM if I didn’t and I don’t know, for some reason I don’t want to. Not like I have anything better to do, but *shrug* 73. Do you prefer Wednesdays or Thursdays? Makes no difference to me. 74. If your school had a Glee Club would you join?  No. I can’t sing. I’m surprised I did choir for a few years in elementary school. 75. Ever performed in a talent show? My 2nd grade class did. We did “This Little Light of Mine” with a few very simple hand movements that went along with it. 76. Have you ever cried in public? Yeah. For the most part it’s only been at funerals and doctor appointments, but there have been a few other times in public where I felt the tears coming and tried to fight them back, but they started coming out anyway. I’m definitely someone who doesn’t like to cry in front of other people, so when it happens then you know it’s bad. 77. Do you have a favorite between your Mom and your Dad? I love both of my parents, but my mom and I have a closer relationship. She’s my best friend. I truly don’t know what I’d do without her. 78. Would you audition for a reality talent competition? Nooo. I have zero talent. 79. How many celebrity crushes have you had?  A lot. 80. How many non-celebrity crushes have you had?  A lot. 81. Name 5 male celebrities who you think are attractive. Alexander Skarsgard, Henry Cavill, Chris Evans, Matt Bomer, and Chris Pratt.  82. Name 5 female celebrities who you think are attractive. Margot Robbie, Jennifer Lopez, Ariana Grande, Hailey Baldwin, and Natalie Portman.  83. Ever been compared to a celebrity?  Ha, no. 84. Have any embarrassing pictures on Facebook? If someone uploads a photo of me that I don’t approve of it gets deleted asap. 85. Do you think spending £20 on Lip Gloss is a waste of money?  That’s too much to me.  86. Are you opinionated?  I do have my opinions I feel strongly about, but I also consider myself to be openminded. I’m open to hearing different sides of things. I want to. And it’s certainly possible for my opinion to change.  87. Do you have a favorite store? BoxLunch, Hot Topic, Kohl’s, Target, and Bath & Body Works. 88. Would you ever wear Flare Jeans? No. 89. Do you own jeans that aren’t skinny? Nope. 90. Have you ever worn the same outfit twice in one week?  Yeah. *gasp* Call the fashion police! 91. What’s the longest period of time you’ve been away from school?  Well, I graduated college 5 years ago if that counts. But if you mean like while I was still going to school, then a few months. I had to miss school 3 times for a few months because I had to have surgery. One of the times was when I was supposed to start UC, but ended up having to start the following semester instead. 92. Do you google abbreviations you don’t understand? Yeah. 93. Does it bother you when people have cats as their profile picture? I don’t care? 94. Own a pair of converse?  Yes. 95. Is there a teacher at your school who has obvious favorites? 96. If yes, are you one of them?  97. Do you text in class?  I never did that. I was a goody-goody lol.  98. What brand of jeans do you wear the most? I haven’t worn jeans at all in like 3 years, ha, but anyway most of my jeans are the Arizona brand from JCP. They’re the perfect fit for me and they’re reasonably priced. 99. At what point do you think sizes are “Plus Sized?” According to Google, it starts at size 16. 100. Do you want to lose weight?  Nooo. I’m too underweight as it is. I need to gain weight. 101. Ever seen a therapist?  No, but I should. 102. Ever watched porn?  Yeah, I’ve seen some of it. I didn’t watch out of enjoyment, though. I don’t get the appeal, personally. 103. Ever purposely ignored a text?  Yes. 104. A facebook message?  Yes. 105. A poke? I always ignored those. That was a dumb feature Facebook had. 106. A friend request?  Yeah. I don’t accept a request from anyone I don’t know. 107. Would you say you read into things too much?  Yepppp.  108. Is your best friend more likely to be the one suggesting something stupid or refusing to do something stupid? Refusing. 109. Do you have a “fun friend?” (A friend who you have tons of fun with but you never really have deep conversations?)  No.  110. Ever been called a bully?  No. 111. Ever purposely hurt yourself?  Yes. 112. Ever gone to church? Yes. I used to go sometimes with both sets of grandparents when I was a kid. They were of different religions, so that began my complicated and non-existent relationship with religion. That changed a few years ago, though, and now I’m a Christian. For over a year I’ve only been listening to the audio version a local church uploaded to their website every Sunday until they started uploading video earlier this year. The past few months they’ve been doing live streams because of the quarantine/lockdown, but they’ll be continuing that going forward for those like me who aren’t able to physically attend. I plan to when I’m able, though. 113. Would you call either of your parents screw ups? Absolutely not! 114. If you turned out exactly like your mom would you be pleased? Yes. 115. What do you want to do with your life? I don’t know. That’s the problem. 

116. Let me guess… You have brown hair? Naturally, yes, but not currently. 117. Already know what you’re being for Halloween? I don’t dress up or do anything for Halloween anymore. The past few years I’ve just stayed home and watched scary movies. I do for the whole month of October, though. 118. Do you still go Trick or Treating? Uh, no. I’m going to be 31 years old this year. 119. Ever liked someone WAY older than you? Celebrities, but not anyone “in real life.” 120. Does it bother you when people have really loud conversations on the bus?  It didn’t really bother me back when I had to take the bus sometimes in college. 121. When you have sunglasses on, do you stare at people?  I don’t wear sunglasses. Also, staring is rude. I’ve had to deal with people staring at me, mostly kids, all my life. Not cool. 122. Ever had a credit card denied? No. 123. What’s the last movie you watched?  Parts of James and the Giant Peach yesterday. 124. Last TV Show?  The Golden Girls. 125. You see your Ex making out with one of your friends. What do you do? I don’t have any friends, but I imagine I wouldn’t like seeing that. 126. Ever been called a whore?  Jokingly. 127. Are you american?  Yes. 128. Ever made yourself throw up? No.  129. Have you ever kissed someone who wasn’t your boyfriend?  Yes. Joseph and I did that for the entire time of whatever it was we had going on.  130. Are you Cute or Gross?  I’m trash. 131. Does it bother you when people say “LOOK HOW MUCH YOU’VE GROWN!”? No one has said that to me in a very long time. I don’t recall being bothered by it, though. 132. Can you say intelligent things around the guy you like?  I don’t like anyone, currently.  133. Ever had the lead in a play?  Nope. Never tried out for a play either. 134. What about a solo in a concert?  Ha, no. I was in choir in elementary school for a few years, but there definitely weren’t any solo parts for me.  135. What kind of a student are you? I did well. 136. Worst subject?  It was always math. 137. Best subject? English. 138. Ever had a crush on a teacher? No. 139. Would it bother you if you found out that your mother was pregnant?  She had a hysterectomy several years ago. 140. How late do you sleep in?  Until like 230 or 3ish. 141. Do you edit your profile pictures before posting them?  I use a filter.  142. Be 100% honest. Do you have any friends who are uglier than you? I was the ugly friend. 143. Do you believe in love? Well, yeah. It exists. I just feel like I’ll never experience romantic love. I’ve been in love twice, but both times were unrequited. I can’t imagine finding love in return and someone who actually wants to be with me.  144. Would you consider yourself a good student?  Didn’t you ask this? 145. Does it bother you when Surveys ask “Did you like this survey?”  It just seems kinda pointless cause they likely won’t see it.  146. Salty, Sweet, Sour or Spicy?  Salty and sweet. I would have said spicy back in the day, but I can’t eat spicy food anymore. Haven’t been able to for the past few years. D: 147. Are you going into High School this year?  Nooooo. Thank goodness. I did my time and graduated over 10 years ago. 148. What about Junior High? Omg, no. I’m old. 149. What is one thing someone could say to you right now that would make you cry?  Let’s not try and make me cry. It’s almost 7AM, I should be asleep. 150. Where did you find this note? LiveJournal.  151. Last question. How many unread messages are in your phone?  I don’t leave any unread text messages. 

[ourloveisforthelovely]

Things done differently 2

Supernatural RPF 

Link to Chapter 1 

Words: 3,979 

Pairings: Richard Speight Jr x Reader

_____

The next morning you woke up with Richard’s arm around your waist. The two of you had spent most of the evening lying snuggled in your bed. You were afraid that he would want to rush into a physical relationship, however, to her relief, Richard didn’t even try. Instead, he lay pleased with just the contact. As much as your hormones were begging Richard silently to make love to you, saying no seemed like the best thing..

The 9:30 alarm going off made Richard jump. You silently laughed hearing him mutter a string of cuss words.

“Still not a morning person are you?”

Richard shook his head as he pressed his face into your hair.

“That will never change, sugar.”

You let Richard lay a moment or two longer. Part of you dreaded facing your parent’s barbecue that day. You knew that there were definitely going to be some fireworks between Richard and Andrew.  That was just a given! You knew that Andrew would never accept Richard now. Even if Richard turned out to be the perfect boyfriend and father, Andrew would never be cool with him. That was just how Andrew Carmichael was.  He had never been the person to let someone who offended him or someone in his family slide by unscathed. It didn’t matter to Andrew that you told him how things actually went with Richard. In Andrew’s mind, Richard should have come crawling back to you begging you to take him back then proceed to kiss your ass for the next however many years. You chuckled at that thought! Neither Richard nor yourself would have any part of that!

If Andrew had it his way, Richard would never again be involved with you or the baby-to- be’s life. He would stay in California and act as the whole relationship never happened. You knew better than to even think that would be how Richard would handle the situation. If he didn’t plan on being involved he wouldn’t have wasted time in coming to you the previous night. He would have never sat there looking so miserable. There was just a whole list of things that he wouldn’t do.

“What are you going to say to Andrew today?”

You asked softly. Richard took a deep breath from behind you. He was quiet for a moment before gently rolling you onto your side.

“I’ll behave if he does. You don’t need all of that shit going on anyway.”

  You smiled. Richard was definitely being the adult here. You knew that he wanted nothing more than to give Andrew the ass chewing of a lifetime! Richard could do it too. You had seen Richard and Andrew have their fair share of spats in the past. For some reason, Andrew and Richard just didn’t click and this was odd because Richard could get along with almost anyone. Even if he didn’t care too much for said person he was still for the most part polite. When it came to Andrew, Richard’s attitude was another story. He didn’t like the way that Andrew seemed to want to control every aspect of your life.

“Older brother or not he needs to shut the hell up. He bosses you around like you are five. You are both on the same level at that recording studio and he thinks you know nothing.”

You knew that Andrew was hard to get along with! He always had been. Andrew had always been arrogant and full of himself. He often left you wondering how his wife Ashton could tolerate him. The thought was always justifiable once one discovered how Ashton truly was. She was a little mouse of a woman who didn’t know how to say no or enough. She let Andrew control every detail of their life. You had considered telling Ashton numerous times that she needed to tell Andrew to take that stick he had shoved up his ass out. Nothing would come of it though.

Marrying a good looking music executive that made more money a year than you had seen in a lifetime was hard to speak up against apparently. Ashton knew not to bite the hand that fed her! You had always pitied the woman and did whatever you could to make her feel comfortable. You remembered the day that your mother had taken Ashton to pick out her wedding dress. The poor woman was in tears when she saw the prices of the gowns. It took both yourself and your mother’s gentle yet firm assurance that price was no issue to get Ashton to even try on a gown.

“What are you thinking about?”

Richard’s voice pulled you from your thoughts. You sighed.

“Just thinking about Ashton. I don’t know how she puts up with Andrew on the daily. I know he’s my brother and don’t get me wrong I love him but if i was married to him he would have been kicked out a long time ago.”

Richard smirked.

“I couldn’t be with him if I were a woman. If I was on the other side of that playground and he came my direction I think I would run. It’s weird enough that he kind of looks like Matt. Attitude, however, is totally different. What I don’t get how is he such an asshole and you are just precious?”

  You laughed slowly sitting up.

“Some in the music industry say that I am an asshole too. Apparently, my family has a bit of a reputation of being cutthroat.”

Richard chuckled.

“Darlin you kind of have to be. You have random ass strangers walking up to you and bursting into song. That would have to get old after a while. Not to mention you have to reject people who have dreams of being something that they clearly aren’t meant to be. I’ve heard you reject people and you are a lot nicer than you think. Andrew is like a fucking Simon Cowell on steroids.”

You laughed at that.

“ You’re biased when it comes to me.”

Richard shrugged as he got out of bed and started looking around for his abandoned jeans.

“Yeah, maybe so but I’m usually right. So, is it almost time for me to go wreck your brother’s day?”

You got out of bed and half waddled to the closet to find something to wear. After a moment, you glanced back at Richard with a smile.

“I invited Rob too ...in case he needs to talk you down or something.”

Richard grinned obviously happy that his best friend got to tag along and join in on the fun that was about to take place.

“Sugar, you do realize that is just going to be like adding some more fuel to the fire right?

You  nodded. You knew that Rob would back Richard up and that was part of the reason for wanting to bring the guy along.

“Well, maybe Andrew needs to be knocked down off of his high horse. Between the two of you, I think that could be done. Too bad we don’t have time to get Matt here then it would really be a party.”

Richard looked pretty excited at the thoughts himself.

“I love the way you think.”

The doorbell ringing pulled both of you from the conversation at hand..

“That will probably be Rob.”

You said with a smile as you pulled a long black sleeveless dress out of the closet. Richard sighed.

“I had plans of coming over there and romancing you off your feet but now that isn’t going to happen thanks to Rob.”

Your eyes rolled up to Richard as he walked over and gently pressed you against the wall.

“Is that so?”

You asked as Richard kissed you softly.

“Mhm….I had some good plans up my sleeve.”

And there it is! You thought. You knew Richard would want sex soon enough! At the moment, however, you didn’t care if it would be jumping ahead too quickly. All you could see right now was the lust written all over Richard’s face as closed the space between them.

“Rich, are you sure you want to do that with me looking like this?”

Richard frowned.

“You’re beautiful. I don’t care if your pregnant or not. That’s my kid. I put it there. I am not some shallow prick that wouldn’t want to touch you because you're knocked up. If Rob wasn’t down there repeatedly ringing the doorbell like a lunatic I would make love to you right here.”

You swallowed as Richard’s mouth closed around your pulse point gently sucking.  

“Richard ...what about Rob?”

Richard groaned as cupped your breasts.

“He will be okay for a moment. He can check your mail or something.”

You giggled pulling Richard’s face back to yours for another kiss.

“Tonight…when we get back…you can have all you want.”

    Richard looked again like a child at Christmas.

“Sounds good to me. I’ll go let Robbie in before he short circuits your doorbell.”

The ride to your parent's house didn’t take long. Rob sat in the back obviously nervous about the upcoming situation. He fidgeted every few moments clearly trying to keep himself calm.

“Rob would you calm down? Nothing is going to happen?”

Richard said looking in the rearview mirror at his best friend’s nervous expression. Rob looked up with a frown that mirrored what he did when Richard decided that it was time for a Dickchat.

“That is what you say all the time.”

Richard smirked knowing Rob was right. He had to hand it to Rob. The man seemed to know what Richard was going to do sometimes for he himself did. You looked back at Rob with a reassuring smile.

“Rob, it will work out. If Andrew starts his crap it may be for the best. He needs to be knocked  down a level or two from time to time.”

Rob nervously laughed.

“Rich, you can knock him down a level or two and I’ll tell you when to shut up.”

“Deal.”

Richard said before turning into the driveway.

Richard had no issues overseeing your mother. She was a nice lady.  His only worry was John D was going to go ballistic upon seeing him and start shooting. Now that he knew that John D was unstable due to his retirement his worry was a little more intense. That poor swan didn’t fair to well the day before. What did that say for Richard when your father saw him? The last way that Richard wanted to check out was like a swan at a country club.

You took a breath seeing Andrew’s Range Rover in the parking lot. You only hoped that since his children would be there; your brother would keep it down some. The last thing that you wanted was for your nieces to see what was going on! You didn’t want your 6 and 4-year-old nieces to witness their father being for lack of a better term an ass. The 6-month-old wouldn’t worry too much but the older ones definitely would!

    “Well here we are.”

You said softly. Richard looked over at you before taking your hand in his.

“I mean it when I say I am going to be good ...well as good as possible.”

You were glad that Richard wasn’t making a promise that he wouldn’t be able to keep. When it came to your honor, their relationship, or anything else that Richard held dear that particular moment he wouldn’t be the least bit afraid to tell Andrew to shut the hell up or he was going to regret being born.

Walking up to the front door, you kept your hand intertwined with Richard’s. As you reached out to open the door Richard grabbed your hand before pulling you into a kiss. You seemed to forget everything that was going on and what the two of you were here to do. Instead, your arms were around Richard’s shoulders deepening the kiss.

“Uh guys…I’m still here.”

Rob said awkwardly. Richard looked over his shoulder at his friend who looked beyond uncomfortable. Rob had been out with the two of you a few times and witnessed this same behavior. Every time it left him looking around awkwardly.

“Sorry, Rob.”

Richard replied innocently as the door opened. You looked ahead coming face to face with Andrew. Your brother’s dark brown eyes focused on you. You were still wrapped in Richard’s arms..

“Christ you have got to be kidding me.”

He said coldly. Richard smirked, ready to start letting the sass fly.

“Not April fools?”

He said with an extra sassy tone. Andrew opened his mouth ready to start but was stopped when your mother walked to the door.

“Y/n, there you are. We were wondering when you were.”

   Andrew scoffed,

“Probably under him.”

Your mother’s eyes narrowed on her eldest son..

“Andrew, don’t start.”

She hissed. Your mother mirrored your expression of disapproval.

“Go find your children, Andrew. Katy was trying to pull the living room drapes down last time that I saw her.”

Andrew muttered a few more things under his breath before turning and walking back into the house.

“Sorry about him. It’s good to see you again Richard. Hello Rob.”

Richard nodded.

“Nice to see you too, Susan.”

Your mother turned walking into the kitchen. She looked over her shoulder at you with an approving smile. Susan had liked Richard from the beginning and when the break up happened she had practically begged you to pick up the phone and call him.  

Richard kept his arm around your waist. Partially because he liked the contact and also he knew that Andrew was watching like a hawk from the other room. You immediately felt uncomfortable when you noticed Andrew whispering to his wife with a livid expression on his face.

“Ignore him dear. He will have to get over himself eventually.”

Susan said looking up from the lemonade that she was stirring. You snorted.

“Mom, he will never get over himself.”

Susan chuckled.

“That is true. Well anyhow, no sense in letting him ruin the day with his negative attitude. How are you feeling, honey?”

  You shrugged.

“I’m fine. If she would get her little foot out of my ribs I would be really happy.”

Susan chuckled.

“You used to do that to me all the time.  You, my dear, are getting your payback. I’ll be right back.”

Once your mother walked away Richard’s hand stroked over your stomach.

“She does move around a lot.”

You nodded.

“She goes crazy at midnight. I hope that is not a sign of the times ahead.”

Richard laughed.

“Better get some strong coffee, I think.”

Before you could respond, your father walked in the room. He smiled immediately seeing her.

“There you are baby! I was wondering where you were at! I’ve been talking to grumpy in there and let's just say he knows how to kill a vibe. You’re looking well now. Glad to see you don’t look so damn peaky!.”

You eagerly hugged your father while noticing Andrew giving him some major side-eye. John D meanwhile, had focused his attention on Richard.

“Hey, you’re back.”

Richard nodded noticing Rob who looked like he was ready to turn and run.

“Yes sir I am.”

Richard said confidently. John D nodded.

“Well that’s damn good. Come on I want to talk to you.”

Your eyes widened.

“Dad...”

John D shook his head.

“You’ll be okay without him for five minutes.”  

Richard shrugged before following your father into his home office. He had briefly made eye

contact with Andrew, who was smiling a little too eagerly.  

“Fuck.”

Richard grumbled as he closed the door behind him.

Walking into John D’s office reminded Richard of being at Bass Pro Shop or Cabelas. Guns and hunting trophies were all over the walls. Richard could only hope that these weapons were on safety. John D sat down in an oversized leather chair behind a huge mahogany desk.  

“Ignore Andrew, son. He is just a horses ass.”

Richard smiled slightly wondering if it would be okay to say that he agreed with that assessment. He decided to see what the conversation with your father was going to be like he would hold off on dissing Andrew too badly.

“He’s all right. Nothing that I haven’t seen before.”

Richard replied. John D nodded.

“So I see that you found out about the baby.”

Richard nodded, immediately feeling a little more on edge.

“I have.”

John D’s eyes were focused on Richard as he leaned back in the chair.

“I’m going to speak my piece then we are going to move on like the men that we are. I know that you had no idea about Y/n’s condition when you left. She’s told me all about that situation and I think it is important that you know I don’t blame you. I love my daughter. She is my pride and joy but she has a lot of her mother’s tendencies and one of those is when she gets backed into a corner she panics. However, you know now and what you do with that is up to you. If you get back with Y/n things better be different this go around. That’s my grandbaby that cookin in there and she isn’t growing up with fighting parents. If you want to be with Y/n,I am fully okay with it just keep this in mind that’s my baby girl in there and I would die for her. I take care of my own. You’re from here and I think you know what I am getting at.”

Richard nodded considering his words before he started speaking.

“I do. You are 100% crystal clear. Furthermore, John, I think you know that if I had any idea that Y/n was pregnant I would have never left her alone in the first place. I’m not leaving her now. I know my track record probably isn’t looking to squeaky clean for you….”

John D held up a hand.

“To hell with the track record!  You’re here! If you knew and you wasn’t here that would be a different story.”

Richard internally sighed with relief. He had been worried that John D would go on some power tirade and tell him that he didn’t want to see him with you. Instead, he was sitting here encouraging it.

“I love her and I’m not going to let her or our baby down again.”

John D nodded, appearing pleased.

“Sounds good to me. You and I are square then.”

20 minutes later Richard had gone outside to rejoin Roband yourself. The two were sitting at the outside table that Susan had expertly decorated. Your eyes widened when he sat down beside you.

“All good? You are in one piece so I am assuming that it went well?”

You questioned. Richard wrapped his hand around yours.

“Everything’s fine. There is nothing to worry about.”

You were relieved as your father sat down across the table.  He sipped on the glass of whiskey that Susan had put in front of him.  Andrew meanwhile eyes his father coldly.  

“Dad I don’t think you need to be drinking that. Thank goodness we have no swans here.”

John D looked at his oldest son with a raised eyebrow.

“Better be glad you ain’t no swan you giant sissy boy.”

  Richard had to pinch himself to stop from laughing. The look on Andrew’s face was the perfect ice cream on the cake.  

“Thanks, dad.”

Andrew mumbled coldly before looking at Richard.

“So, how long are you in town for? I’m sure you need to get back to  California to do whatever it is that you do. I am sure that ghost show just isn’t the same without you.”

Richard leaned back in his chair. He could hear Rob muttering about keeping it cool.  

“I don’t plan on leaving Y/n again if that is what you are getting at. As far as Supernatural...that is the beauty of airplanes, Andrew, if I need to go back to something I can go. Y/n can go with me if she wants to.”

Andrew rolled his eyes.

“Pregnant woman on an airplane that sounds like a bright idea.”

Richard watched Andrew closely. He knew exactly what the little punk was doing.

“It’s not like I am going to put her on a camel. Lots of pregnant people fly. Andrew, I get that you don’t like me and quite frankly I don’t care. You can kiss my ass. I’m not going anywhere and you might as well get over yourself. Y/n doesn’t have to do what you say. You may think that you are god’s gift and that’s okay. Probably best to let you live in your little fantasy world. After all, they do know you there. You may be business partners with your sister but you aren’t bossing her around. I’ll see to that.”

Andrew looked like the was ready to blow. His ears had turned red as he scowled right at Richard.

“You’re right. I don’t like you. I don’t think you are good enough for Y/n. You are just going to bail on her like that character you play in Supernatural. You’ll just run when the tough gets going.”

As Richard started to stand Rob reached up pulling him down with wide eyes.

“Andrew you need to shut the hell up.”

You said through gritted teeth.

  “I don’t have to do anything.”

He said back coldly. Having enough of the conversation at hand, your father leaned back so he could see his oldest son’s face.

“Andrew, don’t make me shoot you son. You and I have had a conversation about this. I don’t want another peep out of you.”

Andrew looked at his father with a gaping expression before he sunk back into his chair not daring to look at anyone else. He knew that it would only be a matter of time before Richard did something to hurt you and no one would listen to him to prevent it.

The rest of the afternoon was peaceful for the most part. Andrew stayed until after the dinner was over before whisking his family home. You were shocked that he stayed that long. Normally after your father laid an ass-chewing on Andrew he would bailout.

The ride back home was relatively quiet. You looked over at Richard with a satisfied smile. You knew that he could have given Andrew a lot worse but he didn’t. No longer did you need some grand sign to know that he cared about you. Everything that he said was perfect! If Andrew had more comments then the man would be preaching to a deaf choir.

“You okay?”

Richard asked softly. You nodded with a satisfied smile.

“I’m perfect.”

Richard’s free had tightened on yours.

“So I guess this is the point where we go public.  People are going to start putting shit together and when the baby gets here it will all be kind of obvious.”

Richard was relieved when you smiled. He knew this was what you wanted in the very beginning. You didn’t want any hiding and now you didn’t either. If someone had something to say about what they had that would just be too damn bad.

“Well time to get this party started then.”

________

@brokencasbutt67-writer

@supernaturalways

@fand0maniac

@shaylybaby2032

@tas898

@li0nh34rt

@summer-novak

@emiwrites3reads

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@shitfaceddaniel

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

Uncle Donald gave her $800 in the 1980s

She let him invest it for her up until now

And she has now $45B

I hope you enjoyed your game as there are more to come but with more people as it enters TV for free of course on Channel Fox.

As always enjoy life and what it brings with the most care you can afford.

Don't let the economy, crumble, Uncle Donald, i hit up JP for some cash since Jesse stole mine from United Business Bank located in Oregon, Washington, and New Mexico.

I own Chase, bought it with Donald and sold to the US Government for a mint. Jesse could got in on this deal but he wanted to challenge me instead.

So I asked Uncle Donald for a cash loan, how much he could afford and what was in his wallet. $4000 roughly. So we split it between his 4 kids (the 4th being me) and I gave him back $200 for the rest of the day.

And we returned to the bank and I asked him how to deposit the money into Chase Manhattan because Denise had bought me clothes but I wanted to be a fashion designer and had altered them So she threw them all away in a rage of jealousy and heat.

Of course i started to cry so we went back across the street to McDonald's and we talked. He said "i have a surprise for you, lets get to the bank"

So we walked alllllll around the building, up and down and he talked to a man and got us inside all the back rooms. He said "i wanna buy it!" And he turned to me and asked "would you like to invest your $800 into my bank as an investor?"

I said "what about my clothes! She said i had to return the money or else i get none!"

"But who did she spend the money on?"

"Me and my brothers and and her!"

"Well don't you think Its time to invest in you and your fashion?" He asked for my $800 i had to pull from 4 different pockets and my sock as he taught me to split to beat pick pocketers. And handed it all. He handed me back $200 and I handed it back then he handed me a $5 from his breast pocket and t told me to keep it.

And began to walk to the counter to buy the bank.

I chased after him and put it in his left cost pocket and told him, 'well you know you bought me lunch so you keep it"

I pulled it from his pocket to produce proof I had already given it and he couldn't give it back and then stuffed it back in deep, all the way i nearly ripped his shoulder off for which I promptly apologized, jumped on the counter and rubbed his soreness off and jumped down.

And he started to cry a little bashful at first then a full sob. And I tried to console him and Robby appeared with a trailing line of toilet paper so his silk hanky wouldn't be soiled with snot.

He thanked him and became startled and asked if he wanted in on the investment.

Robby said, "i might but i need to talk to you, I belong to this boarding school ran by this might be soon white bigger as he calls himself, inspired by her and taken completely out of context"

"Michael Jackson" interjected our new found Uncle Donald. "Come let's sit"

We moved to the side of the spacious lobby to a small table accompanied by two plus club chairs.

He and i talked about how neat it would be to have chaise chairs in Chase bank.

"Well, her mom is abusive, mostly about money so i would like to take control of her stock with her permission"

"Yes! I do! And i will wanna get married!" I jumped with my fist in the air and pushed against the chair like a standing push up and stood

....

"Her sit. First I would like to talk to you as an investor. I am run by the boarding house and they teach us things like to steal and bring back to get 'rewards' much often things less than they are worth like a stick of gum for $2 when I can get a whole pack for 20 cents. Uh oh, here he comes"

"Im about to invest into this bank with these two kids you got something you wanna say to me?" Instead of waiting for a reply, uncle Donald got up and briskly walked to the counter, asking to return to a different room, promptly and away from Mr Jackson whom was still solidly black (he doesn't have vitaligo its just bleached).

And we entered a nearly empty office and he turned fiercely, angry even, "this will be your office where you will WORK"

...

"Its okay! We are still friends!" I climbed into the chair then up onto the desk "this is where I will sit"

"Well close your legs and sit like a lady, like this hand me your foot, no don't take off your shoe"

"Well I didn't want to ruin you! Your suit is NICE!!"

And he moved my foot and crossed my ankles and patted my knee and said "or you cross at here"

I took my ankle to my knee "no not like that, that's like a man. Knee to knee"

"Oh like this?" I squeezed my knees together

Robby laughed and Uncle Donald looked flustered

"Oh i know I know cross at my knees, you need to explain better!" I patted his shoulder. In the 80s it was okay to touch, at least for a child.

"I said that first!"

"Oh! I interrupt!"

"No apologize" Robby groaned

"I apologize for interrupting"

"For?" Asked Donald "you can't tell her that Because ---"

"No he could I get misinformation that way"

"Except when I'm being scolded and she knows the truth" said Robby.

Tune in next week for another Miss Adventure of one Wild Single Mom's Childhood!

I had 48 cents. Robby had put in 2500 front Hayes then 1500 each from Mark and Mike Andrews which he had not signed and they got rejected. Yet Jesse notified me of this, restricted my remote deposit privileges and now i am to notify the Sheriff of Hays County, Austin, Texas that the money is kept hidden in the tax and revenue accounts of his great county. And to open an investigation which he will pretend he did and then not. So i get his hush money as well as the other two and the $15B JP Dejoria stupidly just paid me because i Told Jesse to tell his father in law that Jesse is a stupid piece of shit which he didn't.

And of course I will invest in schools across the nation, installing playgrounds at any schools that do not have them, including intermediate, Jr high, middle, High and etc.. And may be finally lockers at least were I'm centrally located and/or where i want to be, namely at high schools at least.

Because that is what I want to do. Make people happy in the funniest ways possible.

And if there is any left I want to reinvest at the parks i originally invested in, initially, to make them better snd brighter, starting at the older to the newer.

I want the world to seem happier and brighter and in the case of schools at least around here once they hit 7th grade (middle school) they change schools to those that no longer have lockers or desks to put things in, 7 or more teachers to please instead of one or two they spend all day with, like a parent who gives love and kindness and retribution, they go through puberty which in itself is a chore. Then the kids riot. I've seen it in small schools and i know it happens in big ones. 20 in one week at the beginning of school less than a mile from my house where i can hear the school bell.

And so they need a place to sleep their weary heads like the shoulder of an old friend instead of weeping a soul they can no longer call their own.

The secrets i have included here broke my heart to where it actually stopped over and over.

Instead of asking what was wrong, Mr Moneybags Jesse sent me to the doctor alone. -.-

He could have provided me with what i needed like I provided and protected him from Ms Dejoria and Mark Hindberg, Afghanistan and Iraq, which I will no longer do.

He is the one that encouraged Michael Jackson to pickpocket the slaves he had created.

Yes Michael Jackson is Wacko, is Him and is burning in Hell because I killed him with my own pistol Jesse had stolen from a cop, altered and resold to himself at a cheaper price than the way over inflated price he created to create a deficit in his company to receive a refund from the US government's IRS Department in the amount of $8,000 instead of paying the $1M he owed.

I plead guilty before a judge and Uncle Donald, Mrs Katherine Jackson, the Anne my 4 year old daughter that Michael Jackson attempted to rape in front of me, as well as Robby, my true love and of course Sunny and Jesse James himself whom gave me the gun.

Then, before then President Barack Obama, i was exonerated and pardoned completely without the possibility of parole or any other misconceptions that would be included with self defense manslaughter.

This week total I have arrested a total of 19 men and women thanks to the CIA as an unpaid civilian.

That would guarantee me Presidentship of one really great country, now, wouldn't it?

Thanks. And not to be repeated: No more games. Only truth.

Until next time my fair weather friends!

Now! Let's grab the bookie!!! Snag! You're in jail. What did ya know, Mike Andrews, I knew all along that Mark Hindberg was FBI. Why didn't you think that?

Moving along, hi JP. How are you? No one cares. Good thing you trusted into your rapist daughter who was married to a true hero whom puts up with my shit even after we name him Mr Vomit cause I make him so scared he actually vomits like I did tonight (that's included. No more scare, only truth)

Oh yes, JP, you have already been arrested and so you know -- you have no guns with you, right? Alexis Dejoria is no rapist, she's actually an excellent FBI agent whom hates her dad and is included in any exonerations I may have to hand out butbat my leisurely pace, because she actually didn't rape anybody!

Also the US government will pay your wages as you did file a lawsuit this very week by signing up with Namus.gov like we all did.

She like me, was an unpaid civilian whom ran into luck. While she's smart, she's not smart like me. Thus she's the FBI vs me who is CIA and can work against the world in a millisecond as i usually do and have in Afghanistan and Iraq where i protected many NHRA members during their tours in the US Military while they served with Jesse James and my little brother and were even kidnapped thanks to Matt Hagan's temper tantrum and Jesse James refusal to listen to command. Eventually I saved them from that too in a day and 6 hours after leaving base. They were involuntary bound and gagged and beaten within 20 minutes of their capture. Within the next 20 when I was finally told of their status they were rescued by Tony Schumacher and his team.

And now i have saved the NHRA from being beaten and raped and tortured. My time to continue here at home is not wasted,

I love you all and thank you very much for listening...

And now i have something to say about Jesse since i made him puke from a lie via email Because he made me mad for being a Dick douchebag and not caring enough about me, not wrecking his motorcycle and then lying to make me feel bad and stupider than ever although I saw the wreck and my being a girl, up and President running, couldn't stop to rescue or assist a man on his feet whom had already picked up his bike after a wipe out and the trailer passed me up to show me he would assist because forgive those trespassers as we trespass ourselves and i care that he could really been hurt. That may be a fault of mine but it is called Grace and not salvation which is being my daughter reincarnated into a goat in Iraq to keep everyone safe because Jesse is a dumb dumb sometimes and Matt Hagan prefers truth over himself, sometimes. Like being in love with a goat of my daughter's soul, in Iraq. (I bet he fucked her, too. Bestiality freak. Not my business tho, nor yours. But still, let's laugh instead of poking fun at his misadventures. It is funny, yo!)

Jesse cared about the goat so much he listened to her over every one, even me. Because he believed she was closer to God where he needed to be..

I changed his life once in Alabama and several times then, over and over, any time that need be.

But finally for this one time he trusted somebody else and learned to love as much as he could, the soul inside of him.

So God bless to all of the two headed creatures we will see wandering around the backs of people at the NHRA in the future to come. Including even on me.

I'm Mrs Cougar cause of my fingernails and my desire to be with someone young to keep me fresh and Alive -- not by his blood byt by the life he gives me. And he will be Mr Snake the one who slithers up beside me only for love while I labor in the grass kicking myself for what i might have done but not for what i might have missed out on because I was there the whole time thinking and feeling and frolicking through the grass, same as me.

And of course my tattoo will be scary cause the world as I know it, very much can be.

And you can thank me for the past or you can think about the future and beyond!!!

[hornsbeforehalos]

Forever, Sweetheart: Part 2

Pairing: Rob Benedict x OFC, past Norman Reedus x OFC

Warning: Smut, Language, RPF, mentions of violence and sexual assault, mentions of miscarriage, recreational drug use (weed), drinking, Rated E for EXPLICT A/N: TRIGGER WARNING: Mingus and Ky talk about the baby in this chapter. If you have triggers regarding subjects such as infant loss, please be cautious. 

As per usual I mean no harm or offense to anyone referenced or mentioned. this is a work of FICTION and no all your favorite people will be your favorite people in this. They’re characters.

Please do not read this if you are under the age of 18. Please do not copy or steal this and put it somewhere else. I will find you.

I do not own anything related to Supernatural or The Walking Dead or any other shows mentioned in this work of fiction. I am not affiliated with AMC or CW in any way.

MASTERLIST

Tags: @coffee-obsessed-writer @sandlee44 @wildefiction @sorenmarie87 @through-thesilver-lining @runekisses @pink1031 @zelda2248 @kazzieglove @journeyrose @his-paradox @docharleythegeekqueen @beffyblueeyes  Please let me know if you want to be added to the list!

My eyes drifted open the next morning as my senses kicked in, the strong scent of coffee wafting through the small hotel room. I could hear Rob in the shower, the sound of him singing while washing himself coming from the bathroom and making me smile.

I let out a groan as my body stretched itself out, the stiffness in my shoulders making me roll my neck back and forth for a moment before I climbed out of bed. Walking past the mirror on the wall, I let out another groan, this time as I observed the giant rat’s nest that resided itself on my head from falling asleep with it wet.

Lovely way to start out the morning.

I heard the shower shut off and the curtain be pulled back as I sifted through my clothes for the weekend while sipping on the cup of coffee Robbie had set out for me, selecting a Gishwhes t-shirt from the pile as well as a pair of shorts. I was pulling my pajamas off as I heard Rob open the bathroom door, my butt bent over in his direction as I stepped into my denim shorts.  

A low whistle sounded as he pressed his denim-covered groin against my ass as I straightened myself, earning him a giggle from me as his fingers dug themselves into my waist when I turned around in his arms.

“Don’t even say a thing,” I grunted as I watched his eyes widen as he took in the state of my hair, “Not a God damned thing, Benedict.”

Rob chuckled but made the gesture of zipping his mouth, patting my butt before shaking his head as he released me to select a shirt for himself. I made my way into the bathroom after getting the rest of my clothes on, sighing deeply as I stared at the heap on my head.

It took twenty minutes and Rob’s help to get the shit to cooperate, and I was grateful when I was finally able to get it tied into braided pig-tails. I was just done pressing the false last eyelash to my lid when the Richard’s unmistakable rap sounded at the door.

I exited the bathroom as Rob pulled the door ajar to let Rich inside, the poor man already looking flustered.

“Kay, Mish is looking for you. He’s on the war path already.” Rich warned, raking his hand through his hair as he turned to Rob, “Me and you gotta skedaddle, buddy, Daniella is having issues with the sound check guy.”

“Jesus, okay,” Rob sighed, shaking his head again as he pulled a flannel over shirt on. He walked over to me and wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me into a hug before kissing me, “I guess duty calls, my love. I’ll come find you later?”

I nodded before giving him another kiss, waving to Rich as I watched them leave.

It took about thirty seconds before my phone’s ringtone blared. I slide the answer button across Misha’s face, putting it on speaker as I pulled on my converse.

“Whaaaat? I’m on my way, damn. Let me get my fuckin’ shoes on.”

“Hurry your ass, woman! Did you know Marvel people are here too?” Misha asked excitedly. I could tell he had already made his way downstairs to the green room from the noises in the background, Bri’s unmistakable laughter sounding through the phone, “Sebastian fucking Stan even!”

Giggling, I strapped my laptop bag around my shoulder and grabbed my phone, taking it off speaker and pressing it to my ear as I made sure I had everything, “You’re such a nerd. I’m on my way.”

Misha hung up the phone without a good bye, and I placed it in my back pocket as I headed down to the convention.

The majority of the day had been hectic yet uneventful, and it was easy to slip back into the routine of convention life. As I had expected, I didn’t get to see Rob for most of the day, save for a couple of seconds here and there in between dragging Misha from one area of the hotel to another. I had hoped to at least be able to have a moment to go to his panel with Rich and Matt, but Misha wanted me to make sure the Random Acts information desk had everything they needed. I was talking to one of the past Gish contestants when Mingus approached with a couple of his friends.

“Hey Ming!” I beamed at him after the girl left, rounding the corner of the table I was behind to wrap my arms around him, “Glad you could come.”

“This shit is so cool, Ky,” He smiled, folding his lanky limbs across my shoulders as I pulled away to look up at him, “I’ve never been able to actually walk around one of these types of conventions before.”

“It has his moments of being cool,” I chuckled, turning to see two the two guys that came with him staring at me. They both looked familiar, and I remembered seeing them from the time when Ming had stayed with me.

“You guys remember my step mom, Ky, right?” Ming introduced with a wide grin.

Rolling my eyes, I smacked him in the chest with the back of my hand, “I’m like 7 years older than you, dude, don’t call me that.”

“Whatever,” He chuckled, “This is Matt and Kyle. You got time to go with us to get some food?”

I pulled my phone out and checked the time, noting that Rob’s panel was going to be ending soon and he’d texted that he wanted to meet in the green room afterwards.

“I can’t really leave, but ya’ll can come to the back with me if you want, they’ve got hella food piled up back there for everyone.” I replied, placing my phone back in my pocket, “Jensen and Jared should be headed there soon, too.”

“Yeah, that sounds good,” Mingus nodded, watching as I gathered all my things before following me.

I pushed the door to the green room open so the four of us could enter, my eyes instantly finding Robbie perched on the side of the couch with my brother’s guitar, strumming the chords as Jensen hummed. He looked up to me as he felt my approach, his grin faltering slightly as he saw Mingus behind me.

“Mingus! Dude! What’s up?” Jensen said joyfully as he stood up to hug the kid, Jared following suit before moving so everyone could sit down.

I turned to face Rob as Mingus spoke with the others, not missing the glint in his eye as I slotted myself between his legs in front of the guitar. His eyes moved back to the instrument, and he thumbed a few chords before returning his attention to me.

“How was the panel?” I asked sweetly, running my fingers through the thick curls on top of his head. Rob stopped playing and closed his eyes, enjoying the feeling of the scratch of my fingertips against his scalp.

“Mmmm, it was okay. Couple people asked about you.” He answered, his eyes opening and shifting up to look at me as I stopped my ministrations.

“Anything interesting?” I wondered out loud, watching as Jared and Jensen lead Ming and his friends over to the food table. I pulled the guitar from Rob’s grasp as I sat on the couch beside him, my fingers finding the frets effortlessly.

“Nah, just asking if you were going to start doing conventions again, how you were doing, stuff like that.” Rob replied, a smile on his face as he looked down at me playing, “If you were gonna sing with me tomorrow.”

I looked up at him knowingly, my lips pursed together in a straight line as I rolled my eyes at him and sighed through my nose, “Maybeeee.”

“Maybe means yes.” Rob snorted, his grin splitting his face into a  full blown smile, “What song are we gonna do?”

Shrugging, I looked down at the strings of the guitar, “I don’t know, probably just one ya’ll always do or something.”

“I’ll figure out the details and let you know, ‘kay?” He promised, his hand curling around my shoulders as he leaned down to kiss the top of my head. Glancing at his watch, he stood up, “I gotta get back out there, but I’ll see you in a little bit.”

“Kay,” I replied, looking up at him as he leaned down again to kiss my lips, his hand cradling my head and stroking my cheek, “Love you, Rob.”

“Love you too, babe.” he replied before waving to the others, Jared and Mingus rejoining me with his friends as Rob and Rich left the room.

“Mingus said he could join us for dinner after karaoke,” Jared announced as him and Jensen squished themselves onto the couch next to me, tossing a wrapped sandwich my way, “We’re going to that one place we went last year.”

“Cool,” I smiled, letting Jensen take the guitar from me as I unwrapped the sandwich, my stomach growling loudly, “I’m glad you get to hang out, dude.”

“I’ve got the photo shoot tomorrow and I’ll be busy for the rest of the weekend, so I wanna see you as much as I can. We never get to hang out anymore.” Mingus stated, a sad tone to his voice as he took a sip of his drink, “I miss my super awesome cool step mom.”

“Stop calling me that!” I groaned, rolling my head back and huffing as everyone chuckled, “I’m not your step mom!”

“Anymore!” Ming contested before taking a bite of food, playful grin on his face.

“Not never!” I huffed, tossing a piece of lettuce at him, “So weird, dude.”

“I wish my step mom was as cool as you,” Kyle snorted from beside his friend, “Mine’s a cunt.”

“She’s not as cool as you think, kid,” Jensen chimed in, his hands instantly rising up to defend him against a flying piece of food.

Everyone laughed, and I shook my head at Mingus, “Doesn’t he have a new girlfriend or something anyway?”

“Eh. I mean not really I guess. I’ve seen him hang out with that chick Keagan a few times, and he was dating this one chick for a while, but I don’t know what happened to her.”

Nodding my head, the mention of Keagan’s name brought a flood of memories to the forefront of my mind. She’d been my friend, but had let Jeffrey manipulate her into being the reason for Norman and I’s separation. I had no ill will towards her, though, I was extremely over Norman and extremely happy with Rob, but I still wondered from time to time if things would have been different with the baby if she hadn’t done what she did.

Sensing the change in mood, Mingus pulled the subject away from his father, “We need to hang out when we get back to the states. I’m going to be spending the summer in LA with Matt.”

“I’m down dude, I just work all the time so you gotta let me know.”

“I’m sure we will get it all figured out,” Mingus grinned as the door to the room opened, Misha entering, looking rather stressed.

“Kylin! There you are! I’ve been looking all over for you!” He urged, throwing his hands up into the air, “You gotta come to autos with me.”

“Uhhh, why?” I asked, quirking an eyebrow at him and tilting my head curiously, “There’s no reason for me to be there.”

“Because I said so,” Misha stated, his own eyebrow lifting itself, “Now come on.”

Sighing as I wrapped the uneaten portion of my sandwich back up, I turned to Mingus and the guys, “Sorry, my boss is a dick.”

Chuckling, Ming responded,” It’s fine, we gotta go meet my dad anyway for something with Ride, I’ll text you later for the dinner details.”

After telling them bye and showing them the quickest way to get to the exit, I followed Misha down a different hallway towards the autograph room.

“You know I wanted you to come with me so I could spend some time with you, right? You’ve been so busy, I’ve barely seen you.” Misha complained as he threw his arm around my shoulders.

“You’re the one that asked me for the help, dude,” I rasped as I wrapped my arm around his waist, “Runnin’ me ragged.”

“I know, I’m despicable” Misha chuckled, squeezing me close for a moment before releasing me as we neared the area, “I’ll give you a raise.”

“Ha. I doubt it.” I snorted, rolling my eyes and jabbing him in the gut with my finer as he held the door open for me.

I took my seat behind him as he got situated, pulling out my phone to scroll through social media while we waited for the fans to be allowed through. I had been tagged in numerous things on twitter and Instagram, and I ignored most of them as I usually did until one from Mingus caught my eye. He’d taken a selfie with him and his friends and Jared, with the caption ‘Supernatural in Rome, thanks step-mom!’ Followed by a winking emoji.

Stop fucking calling me that! I typed back in a comment quickly, adding a few laughing emojis myself as the room started to fill up. I pocketed my phone again and stood up, moving beside Misha to help the handlers take the tickets.

“Um, Kylin? Would you mind signing this too?” A woman asked shyly, about fifteen minutes into the session.

“Um, sure, I guess. What’s your name?” I replied, startled.

“Megan.”

I gave her a smile and signed the board she’d placed in front of us before handing the metallic marker back to her, “Here you go, Megan.”

“Thank you so much. It really means a lot. I’m sorry about what happened to you.” Megan smiled sadly at me, her eyes kind and gentle, “I lost a pregnancy myself not too long ago. I don’t know your whole story, but it was devastating for me.”

I could feel the crack in my chest try to reopen again as I gave her a small smile back, looking down at my hands before over at Misha, who wrapped his arm around me and kissed the crown of my head.

“Thank you, and I’m sorry for your loss as well. I don’t know where I’d be without my family.” I replied, my voice low in attempt to conceal the emotions threatening to bubble over. The girl got her hug from Misha and moved on, not realizing she’d broached a tender subject.

“You okay?” Misha asked as he watched me sit back down in the chair behind him, my arms crossing over my chest protectively.

“Yeah, I should’ve been expecting someone to talk about it.” I exhaled deeply, “I think I’m gonna go get a cigarette, okay?”

“Sounds good, after I’m done here I’ll meet you upstairs to figure out dinner plans before you leave for karaoke, yeah? I might just go with Ruth and Briana, Jensen and I are arguing today.”

“Just let me know, I’ll kick him in the nuts for you” I snorted, grabbing my purse and double checking I had everything I needed, “Grab my bag when you leave, please.”

“Got ya.” Misha replied with a wink, throwing a thumbs up in my direction as another fan approached and demanded his attention.

I found the side exit quickly, happy to be able to finally get some nicotine into my system. I exhaled the strong smoke as I scrolled through my phone again, trying to forget about the woman’s words. I jumped as the door I’d just came out of opened, but smiled upon seeing Rob crook his head around it, like he’d been looking for me.

“There you are,” He smirked, verifying my suspicions as he let the door close behind him. “You okay? Misha texted me that a fan had upset you.”

Letting one side of my mouth fall, I shrugged, “Not really, just threw me off guard I guess. I should have been expecting it though. It’s why I haven’t been coming to conventions.”

“I’m sure seeing Mingus doesn’t help either, huh?” Rob asked, leaning up against the wall next to me as I took another drag.

Shrugging again, I exhaled, “I mean he doesn’t really bother me, besides with the stupid step mom shit, but I don’t know. This woman decided it would be a good time to share her story with me, and... like I said, I don’t know.”

"I get it,” Rob nodded, reaching over to grasp my free hand, “I’ve had fans do that stupid shit too.”

He leaned his head over and onto my shoulder, chuckling as he said, “That step-mom stuff is definitely pretty weird.”

“Right?” I snorted, a smile breaking across my face that turned into a full blown laugh, “Kid is out of there, man. I’m so glad Calvin and Audrey aren’t like that.”

“That’s because they hate me.” Rob replied, the tone in his voice instantly shifting as he pushed himself off the wall to stand directly in front of me, our hands still entwined.

“They don’t hate you, Rob,” I argued, looking at him before taking another hit from the cigarette, exhaling quickly, “They’re going through a lot right now.”

“Feels like they hate me,” He mumbled, looking down at his feet and kicking at an imaginary rock, “They barely ever call me anymore.”

The kids had taken the divorce a lot worse than Rob had expected them to. Worse then I think they even expected to. They always knew the divorce was eminent, but their mom had them moved all the way to San Diego before the papers were even filed, making them leave behind everything they’d ever known. In their anger they blamed Rob, his inability to work things out with Mollie uprooting and destroying their whole lives.

“Hey,” I said, tugging on his arm to get his attention and make him look at me,  “They’ll come around, alright? Give it some time.”

He smiled weakly, pulling me to him to kiss my lips. I pulled away for a second to flick the butt of the cigarette into the parking lot before turning back to him and pressing my mouth against his.

Curling both my hands around Rob’s neck, I parted my lips to taste his tongue with mine, a soft encouraging noise coming from his throat as he tightened his grip on me. We kissed for a few moments, my skin growing heated under his touch as I moaned into his mouth before he pushed me back into the wall, the brick biting into the back of my thighs as he ground himself into me.

Panting when he finally pulled away, he rasped, “I love you, Sweetheart.”

“I love you too, babe.” I replied, small smile playing on my lips as I gazed up at him lovingly. “Forever.”

“Forever, Sweetheart.” He grinned before kissing me again.

After karaoke, Rob and I met up with the boys and Mingus, his friends having something else planned for that evening. Jensen and Misha were still arguing apparently, something Jensen ‘didn’t wanna talk about’, so he’d gone with Ruth and Bri and the rest of the band. 

We got a ride to the quiet restaurant the boys had been to the year before, the lighting low and music soft as we sat in the back corner and conversed between ourselves. Mingus was taking full advantage of the nonexistent drinking age, knocking back shots in between beers at a pace that would rival even his father’s.

“Mingus, you need some water or something?” Jared asked, concern lacing his voice as the boy finally started to sway back and forth.

“I’mmm...okay.” Mingus sighed, leaning his temple against my shoulder as he sat next to me.

“You sure?” I whispered, tilting my head to peer down at him. There was a sad look on his face, and I brushed a piece of his hair off of his forehead as his eyes met mine for a moment. There was definitely an emptiness there, and my heart broke for him. Poor kid was probably still in the grieving process himself.

“Mind if I bum a cigarette from you?” He asked lowly, up-righting himself on the seat, “I think I need some air.”

“Yeah, I’ll come with you.” I replied gently, giving him a small smile as I watched him stand up. He steadied himself by gripping the table, a goofy grin on his face suddenly as the alcohol started moving through his body again.

Shaking my head with a small chuckle, I turned to Robbie on the other side of me and excused myself, kissing him on the cheek and reassuring him I’d be okay. I looped my arm into Mingus’ elbow, my own slight intoxication making me lightheaded. We exited the building and turned down the narrow alleyway beside it, finding the small private smoking area dimmly lit by a street lamp down the way. Leaning against the cool brick, I passed Mingus a cigarette from my pack before placing my own between my lips and lighting it.

“You alright?” I drawled cautiously, my eyes scanning him as he looked down at his feet.

He stayed silent for a few moments, his eyes never leaving the ground before a silent tear rolled down his cheek, barely visible in the lighting.

“Hey, sweetie, you’re okay,” I instantly soothed, reaching my hand out for his and pulling him to me. His long limbs encased my shoulders, a muffled sob retching through him as he pushed his face into my hair.

“Shhhh, Ming, it’s alright,” I cooed, rubbing his back with my free hand as I flicked the accumulated ashes with the other, “Come on, let’s sit.”

I pulled away from him and tugged him towards a nearby bench, making him sit beside me as I helped him wipe his tears away while his breathing slowed.

“Sorry, Ky,” Mingus rasped, his voice still cracking with emotion, “It’s just…this year has sucked so fuckin’ much for me.”

Nodding my head as I exhaled smoke from the drag I’d finally taken, I placed my hand in his, “I know, babe. It’s been hard for everyone.”

“I have dreams about him, you know? Nax. I see him.” He mumbled, his words slightly slurred.

“I do too. Except I won’t ever know for sure if it’s really him I see.” I replied, my own voice shaking as I fought back the tears that were threatening to spring forth.

“What do you mean?” Ming asked, his brows furrowing in confusion. “Dad didn’t show you a picture?”

Shaking my head, I brought the cigarette to my lips for the last time before tossing it, “He never talked to me after the day I woke up. There were no pictures taken of him that I know of.”

“What a dick, are you fuckin’ serious?” Mingus cursed, swaying to the side slightly as he shifted to pull his phone out. Before unlocking the screen, he looked up at me, his eyes meeting mine, “Do you want to see?”

Nervousness pin pricked throughout my bloodstream, stinging my skin as my stomach dropped. I couldn’t stop the moisture from rolling down my cheeks, a sob gasping from me as I nodded my head.

It had been over a year, and I never once had seen a picture of my son.

Exhaling sharply, Ming sniffled before wiping his nose. He unlocked the phone and scrolled for a second. Finding what he was looking for brought a small smile to his face, his watery eyes looking up at me before asking, “You sure?”

Nodding again, I held my breathe, closing my eyes for a second while he turned the phone around. When I opened them again, I was peering into the most beautiful blue eyes of the most beautiful baby I’d ever seen.

My chest cracked open as a sob wracked through me again, but it was accompanied by a smile spreading across my lips as I took the phone from him. Lucian’s perfect face was was right there, looking up at me. I noted the nasal tube that curled around his cheek, the only thing besides his obvious size that made him appear any form of weak. My shaking fingertips drifted over the screen, tracing the lines of his little nose and lips. I felt strong arms wrap themselves around me from behind, the scent of my brother encasing me instantly. I’d been too absorbed in staring at my son that I hadn’t even heard him and the others approach.

“He was beautiful, sissy,” Jensen croaked, eyelids blinking back tears as I turned around to look up at him, “Just like you.”

Sniffling as I attempted to compose myself, I handed the phone back to Mingus, prying my eyes away from the little thing on the screen.

“Thank you, Ming. Can you please send it to me?” I sniffled, exhaling the tension from me as foot steps could be heard approaching.

I turned my head to see Norman’s silhouette, the looming figure unmistakable.

“You alright, kiddo?” He rasped, his voice husky as he took in the sullen expressions on our faces.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Mingus snapped, pulling hisself unsteadily to his feet.

“I sent him a text when ya’ll hadn’t come inside for a bit. Figured you needed a ride,” Jared spoke, clearing his throat uncomfortably.

“I’m fine.” Mingus spat, glaring at his father, “I’m so fucking pissed at you, dude.”

“What the hell did I do?” Norman questioned, confusion twisting his face.

“What the fuck is wrong with you, Dad, huh? You were so wrapped up in your own asshole that you couldn’t even let her have a fuckin’ picture of her child!?” The boy’s towering figure stepped into Normans personal space, his chest puffed out in fury, “Not only did you fucking blame her, you couldn’t even give her closure for that? And you never fucking told me?”

Mingus shoved his father back, Norman stumbling before catching himself before he could fall. Jared instantly shot his hand out to Mingus’ chest as the boy attempted to advance again, rage flicking in Mingus’ pupils and encasing his irises.

“Enough, Ming,” I begged, my hand wrapping around his wrist and pulling as Jared and Jensen placed a barrier between the son and the father. I could see Rob helping Norman to his feet over their shoulders, hushed words with a sharp tone being spoken between the two.

“Fuck you, Dad, seriously. I hate you!” Mingus continued, fighting against the bodies surrounding him, “I fucking hate you.”

“Ming, you don’t mean that.” I argued, continuing to tug on his arm until he looked at me, “Come on, I’ll get you back to your mom’s hotel.”

I turned to lead him towards the parking lot, when I heard Norman’s voice call out to me.

“Just know I’m sorry, Whiskey.”

[crazedlunatic]

Adrian and Matt’s First Date

“I honestly didn’t think you were going to show up. That’s why I suggested the beach… since, you know, you spent two months cancelling within two hours of the date.”

Adrian sat down on the ground in front of him, looking apologetic but not actually apologizing. “I didn’t even know there were beaches here.”

“How did you not know there were beaches here?” Cookie Guy, or Matt, looked at him like he was crazy. “There’s seven… although, honestly I would only consider three of them real beaches myself. Massachusetts has a weird definition of beach.”

“I probably did not know because I’m not from here and spend 90% of my life at work or school.” Adrian shrugged.

“So, you don’t live here live here?”

“I’ve been here about a year and a half. I go to Harvard.”

“You were giving me a hard time about my age and you’re still in undergrad?” Matt looked amused.

“No. Harvard Law.”

“Oh. Wow.” Matt’s eyes widened. “Okay then.”

“Yep. A pretty guy who is smart too. Love the trope.” Adrian sighed.

“School isn’t really my thing.” Matt said. “But good for you.”

“What is your thing?”

“Apparently playing date tag with a stranger who stole my cookie.” Matt shrugged.

Those freaking blue eyes.

“Yeah. Sorry.”

“There is no way you had things come up for two straight months, by the way. So why did you even come?”

Adrian narrowed his yes.

“I mean… I even had to get two shifts covered only for you to cancel… that meant I had to work St. Patrick’s Day and I really wanted to get drunk, so…” Matt said. “It’s literally the first actual holiday I’ve had off in three years… well, would have been.”

“Your job sounds like it sucks.”

“It pays well.” Matt shrugged.

“Are you even old enough to legally drink?” Adrian asked him.

“Do you think you’re better than everyone else or just me?” Matt titled his head.

“Wh—”

“You aren’t very nice. I thought the whole cookie thing may have been a fluke because we all have bad days… but you don’t seem that much better today.”

“Are you even old enough to date somebody out of undergrad?”

“Okay.” Matt stood. “Have a good day, Adrian. Watch out for sharks. Probably aren’t any at this beach but they saw three yesterday in Cape Cod.”

“I’m sorry. Don’t go.” Adrian looked at him.

“Why did you keep rescheduling for two months to sit here and do this? Do you think because you go to Harvard Law and you’ve got a nice face, that you can treat people however you want?”

“Because I don’t do this very well.” Adrian said. “I’m sorry.”

“Well with that attitude, I’m not surprised.” Matt sat back down. “Where are you from?”

“Colorado.”

“Denver?”

“No.”

“Aspen?”

“No.” Adrian scrunched his nose up. “Boulder.”

“What is even there? Nobody can ever tell me.”

“A lot of mountains, a lot of parks, a lot of trails, and a lot of skiing… among other things.” Adrian said. “Where are you from?”

“Here.” Matt shrugged. “But you already know what’s here.”

“Yeah, some of it.” Adrian laughed a little bit. “Honestly the only time I really get to see any of it is on winter and summer break.”

“You don’t go home?”

“I went back when my grandmother died two months ago but that was it… and I basically left after the funeral.” Adrian looked thoughtful.

“Oh my God. Is that why you cancelled?”

“Just the second time.” Adrian looked around. It wasn’t a typical beach… but it was still very nice… and very Cambridge.

“I’m sorry to hear that. Where do you work?”

“CMJ.”

“Oh God.” Matt groaned.

“What?” Adrian asked, somewhat dismissively.

“Oh, it’s great. My dad is really close friends with one of the owners, though, and he gives me a hard time.” Matt laughed.

“… Which one? Jeff?”

“That guy is an idiot. No. Bob. Er, Robert? I don’t know what people call him at work. My dad just calls him Robbie but it feels weird to call him that.”

“Your poor dad.” Adrian said.

“No. Bob’s great.” Matt shook his head. “He’s a really good person. He can be a bit of a dick, though. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to go to CMJ to…”

“To what?”

“Give him stuff for my dad.”

It was kind of true.

If by stuff you meant following him home after bad trials and keeping him from getting beat up in the office when giving criminals bad news.

Technicalities.

“What does your dad do? Is he in law?”

“No. He’s the Chief of Police. When I have nothing to do, he sends me on errands… I mean, he could just make Pete do it but I’m the youngest and we always get the short end of the stick… even though I am taller by half an inch. Which I remind him daily.”

“I’m the oldest sibling.”

“Yeah, I can totally see that.” Matt nodded.

“What is that supposed to mean?” Adrian laughed, not sure whether he should be offended.

“The oldest sibling always thinks he’s better than everyone else.”

Adrian opened his mouth and then closed it.

“You didn’t even disagree. Oh my God.” Matt rolled his eyes but he was smiling. “How many siblings do you have?”

“Four. Including a twin.”

“Oh God. Do I have to worry about you switching up on me?”

“Well that would be a silly thing to worry about because she is a girl, so no worries there. My youngest brother does look a lot like me when I was his age, though.”

“I am the youngest of four… and all of us are boys.”

“Your poor mother.”

“Everyone always says that. I mean, we were all pretty good, though.”

“Well you had a police officer for a dad.” Adrian pointed out.

“Same as any other dad. We just saw him a lot less on holidays.” Matt shrugged. “Plus, I basically put them through hell from fifteen to eighteen so I was the only trouble child… My mom used to call me ‘Trouble.’”

“What, was that last year?” Adrian teased, but this time Matt could tell he wasn’t doing it to be rude.

“Ha. No. And quit fishing. I’m not telling you.”

“I’m 23. I’m not going to be very happy if you are still a teenager or only 20.”

“I am not 20.”

“21?”

Matt shrugged.

“22?”

Matt shrugged again.

“There is no way you are older than 23.”

“I dunno.” Matt singsonged.

“If I was this anxious about a date with a 20 year old, I am going to be so pissed.”

“Let’s go do something.” Matt hopped up and held out his hand to help Adrian up.

As soon as Adrian was standing, a kid came and tackled Matt, arms going around his legs.

“THANK YOU MATTTTT!”

Adrian looked around, very confused, as a woman rushed up after the small girl.

“Mommy, it’s Matt and he saved my cat. Matt Cat. Cat Matt.”

“Sweetie, please have boundaries and he’s not even working.” The woman said.

“Nuh uh, Mommy. They’re always working. It’s in the rule book.”

“That rule book actually doesn’t exist. I was joking.” Matt said as the little girl let him go.

“At any rate, thank you again for saving her cat.” The girl’s mom said.

“Who doesn’t want to climb a million foot tree in the rain to save a cat?” Matt shrugged.

“You’re the best.” The girl looked at Matt like he’d hung the moon… and also kind of like a child-stalker.

“Okay. Tell him thank you one more time and then we have to leave because he’s on a date.”

“But they’re both boys, Mommy.”

“Well sometimes boys like boys.” The woman said. “Tell him bye.”

“Bye, Matt! Have fun kissing!”

The woman mouthed ‘I’m so sorry’ before going after her daughter, who had run off.

“What was that about?” Adrian asked. “Random girls call you when their cat is stuck in a tree?”

“I mean… not usually. My assumption is the firemen were elsewhere?” Matt shrugged. “Honestly, though, I’m pretty sure she’s in love with me. Any time she sees me she does the same thing—makes some excuse to run over and hug me… but her Mom is close friends with one of my brothers so it’s kind of hard to say, ‘I’m tired, sorry.’”

“How many girls have crushes on you?”

“What age range are we talking?” Matt asked.

“How many age ranges have crushes on you?”

“Well, you’ve got your toddler range, your kid range, your preteen range, your—”

“Okay, okay. You’re cute and likable. I get it.” Adrian laughed. “What are we going to do?”

“Are you hungry?” Matt asked.

“Not yet.” Adrian shook his head.

“Have you been to the Museum of Bad Art? It’s in the Somerville Theater.”

“How far away is Somerville?”

“You really haven’t been around much, have you?” Matt stopped outside of a very sporty Honda Civic.

“Oh God. Is this yours?”

“Yes. It is. I was too lazy to fill up my work car. I’m actually very selective about when I drive it.”

“Well, it’s very nice… how far away are we going, though? You’re not going to kidnap me, are you?” Adrian was mostly joking but gave Matt a look.

“It’s less than ten minutes away.”

“Okay.” Adrian got into the car.

Honestly, if people were coming up and thanking him for saving cats, he must not have been that creepy.

…

“That was ridiculous. I mean, I hadn’t been before either. But wow.”

“I don’t know. I was kind of partial to the ferret in a brothel one.”

“Not the creepy cat that looks like it was about to recite the Pledge of Allegiance? That or go off to war?” Matt looked at him. “Or that torso phone? I couldn’t tell if it was supposed to be being murdered or having an orgasm.”

“Yeah, that was creepier than the cat. I liked the sign that said the gallery was protected by fake security cameras.”

“Like 60% of all security cameras are fake.”

“How do you know that?” Adrian asked.

“Because companies are cheap as all get out.” Matt shrugged. “So… are you hungry yet?”

“Not really.”

“Fine. Can I just kiss you now then?”

“What?” Adrian looked at him, shocked.

“Well usually you wait until the end of the date but I’ve pretty much been thinking about it since the first time I saw you and—”

Adrian stepped up, kissing him mid-sentence.

“Oh. Okay. That was unexpected.”

Adrian smiled brightly.

“What if we just… go to my house and do that some more until you’re hungry?”  Matt asked.

“Okay.” Adrian got into the passenger seat of his car.

Sure, he’d literally had sex with one of his classmates two nights before. It wasn’t serious, though… Actually, Adrian was never very serious.

Although this did feel… different.

“To be honest, I haven’t been there in two and a half days and I had barely any sleep before I left so I’m not sure if it’s clean or not but…”

“I don’t plan to be looking at your tables or floors, Matt.”

…

Adrian woke up the next morning, comfortable and warm but having no idea where he was.

Neighborhood, anything.

He could remember making out with Matt, things getting heated, and then zip. Nada. Nothing.

He was still dressed, though, so that was good.

He stood and left Matt’s bedroom, walking into the living room. Matt was sitting in his pajamas and talking on his phone.

“I mean, I’m already pulling 64 hours next week and after tonight, I’ll be at 58 for this week… Theoretically, yeah, but nobody wants to do that… Logan, seriously, if you don’t give me my birthday and Christmas off, I am going to make your life a living hell until one of us dies—probably you because you’re older… Yeah, love you too asshole. Seriously. Birthday. And. Christmas. Fine. Bye.”

“That sounds like a very crazy work schedule.” Adrian said, coming over.

Matt didn’t even jump. He just shrugged when Adrian sat down next to him.

“You knew I was back there, didn’t you?”

Matt nodded.

“I fell asleep, didn’t I?”

“Yeah.” Matt nodded again.

“We didn’t have sex right?”

“Nope.” Matt shook his head.

Adrian nodded his head once, looking at Matt. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay. A first date doesn’t have to end with sex.” Matt shrugged. “You must have been tired. You were just out. I was almost worried you’d passed out from lack of oxygen.”

“Oh God.” Adrian’s eyes widened in horror.

“I’m kidding. You fell asleep when I went to use the bathroom.” Matt smiled.

“Your pillow was comfortable.”

“Yeah. I’m kind of partial to it.” Matt’s smile grew and he looked into Adrian’s eyes.

“I… uhm…” Adrian bit his lip and looked at him. “I really enjoyed yesterday with you.”

“I had fun too.” Matt smiled again.

Adrian leaned forward, his hand resting on Matt’s thigh.

“Before we do… this.” Matt sat up. “I have to admit something. I was just not going to tell you, but…I probably should.”

“If you tell me you’re straight and married with children, I might kill you.” Adrian said.

“We, uhm… met before.”

“At the coffee shop. I know. You gave me the cookie.”

“Well I almost gave you something earlier that day too.”

“What?” Adrian looked confused. “Is that an inuendo?”

“No!” Matt said quickly. “I almost gave you a ticket.”

“You wha— Oh my God. I knew I know you from somewhere!”

“Yeah. I should have told you at the coffee shop but… I didn’t want you to just turn me down again.” Matt admitted. “And then I was going to just not tell you at all but… I had a lot of fun with you yesterday and if this goes somewhere, I didn’t want us to start out with a lie.”

“They were on lunch by the way.”

“I know. Ugh, they always are from 1 to 2… but people have died going 20 miles over the speed limit several times, so…”

Adrian leaned forward and kissed him. He then pulled away quickly. “Hey! You gave me a hard time but you parked illegally outside of the coffee shop!”

“I know, I know. I didn’t know the line would be so long and honestly, they never care when I do it. Actually, it makes their shop look safer. It’s not in the best part of town.” Matt shrugged.

“You’re a cop.”

“Police officer.”

“You’re a police officer.” Adrian repeated.

“I promise I’m not a buzzkill at parties… I am, however, the one that barely drinks so I can make sure everyone gets home safe.” Matt said. “Even if you don’t see it, I will always have a gun. And I’ll always walk in before you because it’s what I do with my team out there and it’s kind of habit. I will hold it open for you still, though. I probably just won’t be looking at you while I do it… and I’ll always want to sit facing the entrance because I like to know who and what’s around me.”

Surely he’s not super young if he’s got his own team and goes in first… He must be good.

“I might be able to handle that.” Adrian gave him a small smile. “Are there perks?”

“Donuts.” Matt grinned. “Seriously. I’m not even joking… although I’ll eat any pastry. That and girl scout cookies will shut the office down.”

“What is the best part?” Adrian asked.

“The kids. My partner and I always stop at the lemonade stands and when it’s slow, we’ll play ball with kids in the neighborhood… also, when it’s slow when we work in the winter we sled with them.”

He is just too freaking adorable, Adrian thought.

“Worst part?”

“There’s a few worst parts.” Matt admitted. “Like being the first one to an accident and having to hold someone as they’re dying… coming up on an accident from speeding and seeing mangled bodies of people who didn’t have on seatbelts—especially kids. And… having to kill people.”

“You’ve had to kill people?”

“Twice. It really sucks knowing that you’ve ended a life even if it was to save someone else.”

Adrian nodded, frowning.

“The pros definitely outweigh the cons. All the emergency services are like your second family. Well, I guess I have actual real family in the police station too… And Shop with A Cop at Christmas is the best although I usually end up spending my own money too, not just what we’ve raised…I mean, basically anything with kids and I’m down. They’re so funny.”

“You don’t have a handcuff kink, right?”

“Oh God, no. Besides, handcuffs are disgusting. Everything from cocaine to feces on them. Anyone who would willingly put those on is crazy.” Matt shuddered. “Plus, I’m pretty vanilla. Very vanilla actually.”

“Are you going to tell me how old you are yet?” Adrian asked.

“Eventually I will.” Matt nodded.  “But not yet.”

“But you are 21 or over?”

“Yep!” Matt said cheerfully. “So… you’re taking me out on the next date, right?”

“Yes… but only if you come back to bed with me now.”

“Don’t have to say that twice.” Matt hopped up.

“Hey… where’s your gun now?” Adrian asked, crawling onto the bed

“Safe where nobody can get to it. Literally. In a safe.” Matt crawled on top of his, unbuttoning your shirt. “You’ll definitely be doing a walk of shame back into your apartment tonight. Sorry.”

“I have a feeling it will be worth it.” Adrian pulled Matt down on top of him. 

[nerdygayboi]

This is going to be a long post, and it's mostly just to help me bury some emotions and let go of the past.

This is a love letter to quite literally all the guys I've ever liked, loved, or obssessed over. My grand out pouring of emotions, whose existence I tend to refuse. I sorted all 50 guys into 3 categories: the ones I lusted for, the ones I liked, and the ones I loved.

To the ones I lusted for: Alex-1, Alex-2, Andres, Arturo, Daniel, Dante, Jake, Jason, Julian, Justin-1, Kevin, Matt-1, Nate-1, Nate-2, Robbie, Steven, Tyler-1, Tyler-2, Zach, That Freckled Guy, and That Sleazy Guy;

  You were all just pretty faces and pretty bodies to me. I talked to you all only a handful of times; you were never signifigant to me apart from when my mind wandered in my own company. The only reason I mention you all in this post is that I need to let go of my obession for boys that, though outwardly beautiful, lack inner beauty. Even as I write this I struggle to remember your full names, and for 2 of you, I can't even rememver your first names; all testament to the lack of importance having met you made in my life. Though I am grateful for having seen your handsome faces, or in some cases handsome rears, I found your personalities dissapointing. Tyler number 2 especially, since last I checked he was wanted for attempted burglary. I thank you all for your beauty, and wish all(but Tyler number 2) luck in whatever your endeavors are, I honestly have no clue what they are.

To the ones I liked: Alex-3, Alfonso, Andrew, Brian, Cody, Colin, Elijah, Ethan, Francisco, Harry, Jack, Jacob, James, Jordan, Justin-2 , Hector, Matt-2, Michael, Pedro, Ramon, Sam, Stephen, and Will,

      At one time, I considered each of you friends. Some were admittedly more dear to me than others, but I would let no harm come to any of you. I'm grateful that each of you made me laugh, and that you all suffered my presence with dignity. I suspected that some of you were not heterosexual, but given my need to conform to 'the norm' and remain in the closet, I never asked. I will admit that I did want to ask those I suspected on a date, but alas, my lack of conviction was my enemy.  I have the upmost confidence that you will all become wonderful people, and I am eager to hear from you in the future.

The ones I loved:

To Matthew V.,

      For many years I did not have a best friend, then I met you. We didn't take to eachother much on our first meeting, but you seemed interested enough in me when we started taking our music classes together. I remember you addressing me by name, that day I started music, though I couldn't remember yours since we only talked once two years prior. I don't think I ever told you how grateful I was for your help in music, I was placed in the advanced class by error with no experience holding a violin. I won't mention our history class, it was dull and I only just remember that we had it together.

You were also the first boy to invite me over to your house, granted it was for a project, but I was invited over many times after that. I love your family, they were so kind to me, and your mother even began chastising me for skipping meals. I felt like I fit in with them, and I was comfortable by your side. Your quirks were endearing - seriously, who tries to say 'sneeze' every single time before they sneeze?- and I loved that I could joke around with you every chance I got with only minimal scolding. You were everything I wanted in a boyfriend, and I secretly thought of you as mine for a time, though I can't remember a time when relationships came up in our conversations. You made me happy for some years of friendship, even if I liked to think of us as more than friends.

Then we started drifting apart. You started talking to people other than me, I stopped coming over to your house, you started dating Brittney. I missed you, for a time, but I knew it was better for you to grow into who you wanted to be. I thank you, for being my friend when I needed one.

To Dalton S.,

       You are perhaps the most handsome person I've ever met. Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, took notice of you. There were straight guys and lesbians that admitted to finding you attractive. It's baffling how someone like you exists, and even more so, how you were regarded as so handsome despite a combination of acne and razor rash on your face all four years of highschool. How an adonis like you ever thought of me as a friend is one of the greatest mysteries of our time.

I'll admit that the first time I saw you, I thought you were albino; with your hair so blonde it was white in the sun, and skin so fair that it went red under florescent lights. I didn't think much of you until we had classes together. I remember we didn't talk in our engineering class; but you did seem to express a bit more interest than most when I was praised for breaking 2 school records - highest flying bottle rocket, and farthest distance traveled by those race-cars we shot off the end of an air-compressor. You even ran out the classroom to keep my race-car from going into the parking lot.

The next memory of you that I have is when you stared in my general direction in our 8th grade english class. I looked up from working and you were just staring, almost like you saw a ghost. I looked around to see what you were staring at, but had no clue what you were doing. There were no instructions for us on the board on my side of the class. I even waved to get your attention, and when you looked at me, I mouthed 'What are you looking at?' to which you mouthed something I couldn't read and pointed vaguely. I couldn't find what you were looking at, so I sighed and returned to my work. I still have no clue what you were looking at.

After that, if I saw you staring blankly forward I simply waved to you and mouthed "hi". I think I pulled the gag of repeatedly saying hi an absurd number of times once, but I can't remember. I do remember you and some other boys mouthing "olive oil" to me in our science class that year, which I mistook as "Oliver" and became confused since there wasn't an Oliver in our class. The only memory I have left of you from 8th grade was when I sat behind you in math and had to tell you, on multiple ocassions, to pull up your pants. Sagging was not for you, and I thank you for defending me when Austin tried to critiscise me for making sure your pants were pulled up properly. Your pants being where they were supposed to be was both a matter of upkeeping your dignity, and removing a distraction - so I could focus on the whiteboard, rather than your white crack.

To speak plainly, I only remember being an admirer from afar until we were lab partners in high school biology. And that's when I learned your little quirks: finger tapping, humming, and singing country songs under your breath as you worked. Later I learned that you though of me as a friend, which I thought odd since we rarely spoke after getting new lab partners. We were- Who am I kidding, I can't not mention it.

I thought I was lucky as fuck to not only have you as a lab partner, but to also have the locker next to you in P.E. Ooooh so many people would consider it a sin for me to have looked at you in the locker room, but I don't regret it. You didn't have the most muscle of our grade, nor did you have a flat stomach or abs. For some reason knowing you had some body fat and stretchmarks made you so much more attractive. You, the most sought after boy, had what no one wanted; but you were so confident in yourself that it didn't matter to anyone. I'm cutting this off early within interest of actually finishing this. Thank you for being friendly to me, and sticking up for me that one time. I'm sorry I called you a "racist-ass motha fucka" that one time. You were/are the longest standing crush I've ever had; and I wish I had tried to be your friend instead of forcing myself to keep to minimal contact.

To Matthew M. & Skyler F.,

      I address you together because of your pre-existing history, and the emotions I've felt because of you both.

Matthew, I hope you've finally moved on from Him. You deserve someone who would actually love you, instead of just your body. I wanted to date you, but given that we're both from intolerant families; I made myself distant. Thank you for coming out to me, and trusting me with knowing what was happening. I wish you would have treated yourself better, though I know I probably couldn't have kept you from being so reckless. I hope everything is going well for you, you sweet, sweet giant boy.

Skyler, I hope your bloodline rots. I use you as a compairison for wether or not I am a complete failure. As long as I am above you, I am not a failure. I take pride in knowing that I will always have more worth than you.

And finally

To my ex-boyfriend, Jose M.,

      I'm sorry. I've tried to hate you, I've tried to blame you for everything; but I can't. I could never. I used to think it was all my doing, but I've realized that it was our circumstance that doomed us from the start.

I like to think I've moved on; I no longer cry on your birthday(which passed recently with no incident), and I rarely dwell on thoughts of you anymore.

I mentioned before, in that message that I don't know if you ever recieved, that I got rid of everything. There's no proof that we ever spoke, save the only pictures I have of you. I want to be free of the memory of you, but I don't want to forget either. You were my only instant of requited love, even if we were so young and oh so stupid.

I often wonder what would happen if we ran into eachother some place. You probably wouldn't recognize me, but I know I'll recognize you. Your goofy smile, your half-hearted bravado, the same sad eyes as mine.

It's funny, I thought I've moved on; but here I am, writing this with watery eyes.

Did you know that I can't even say your name? If I speak it, write it even, I have to put a different face to it. For some reason it feels wrong to say your name, almost like avoiding it will keep the memories at bay - if only that were the case.

I can't form the thoughts of what I want to say, what I need to say to you. I'm doing much better now, and I've kept my promise - even if you couldn't keep yours.

I lied, I haven't kept it. Breaking my promise was the first thing I did when I lost you. Please forgive me. But I am doing much, much better now.

Love,

NerdyMegaGayBoi

[writing-in-the-impala]

St Louis: Part 1

Pairing: Rob Benedict x Reader

Series Summary: A lake house, a high school reunion and a fake girlfriend with a real crush, what could go wrong?

Warnings: Fuff, angst, just a emotional rollercoaster.

Word Count: 4k

A/N: This will either be a short mini series (10k words/ 2 parts) or if you guys like this I’ll make this longer. I know this is aa ‘fake girlfriend” trope that is done all the time but I love to mess around with it.

St Louis Masterlist

You were packing your bag to go to a holiday lake house in St Louis, Missouri. You were flying out there to go see your friends and spend a week with them there while, Rob whose house it was went to his high-school reunion. You were on the phone to Rob while packing getting some last details.

"So the address is 32 Ladue Mdws, SAINT LOUIS, MO 63141." Rob said leaving time for you to write it down. "Got it?"

"Yep." You confirmed.

"Okay so when you, Kim and Briana arrive me Rich and probably Osric will already be here, the house has five bedrooms."

"Wow." You said.

"I know it's amazing, anyway there isn't a pool but it's a lake house so there's a lake, hm what else," Rob thought.

"What's the sleeping arrangements?" You asked.

"So I'm sleeping in one of the rooms alone and Rich is sleeping in a room alone, Kim and Bri have a double room, Osric is sleeping in a room with Matt and your sleeping in a room with your friend umm.."

"What you can't remember my best friends name because she isn't in Supernatural? Does that mean you forget who I am?" You teased Rob.

"hmm what your name again?" Rob asked playfully.

"I'm gonna get to Missouri and I'm gonna slap you." You said.

"Wait, wait I remember who you are, your Y/N Y/L/N , you've been my best friend for what like three years now? You have a tendency of hitting my shoulder whenever I say anything to offend you, when you wake up every morning if you don't listen to music you have a terrible day, you love supernatural conventions, you started watching Supernatural because you wanted to understand what's going on at the convention s and then you got obssesed, your-"

"Okay, okay Robbie you proved it you know me, wow you could write my autolbiography-"

"Well biography auto means that you-" Rob began correcting you.

"Anyway I need to pick up Charlie, yes that's her name," you said changing the topic.

"I- I know her name, I just forgot it, we hang out with her a lot, I mean it was my and Rich's idea to invite her along too." Rob interjected.

"I know, I know, any way I really have to go I need to go pick Charlie up and then meet Kim and Bri at the airport and then we're all coming to your house for a major sleepover."

"Okay talk to you soon, have a safe flight."

"Thanks, talk to you soon." You say hanging up.

The four of you arrived at the lake house around 1 am, you were meant to arrive earlier but your flight was delayed. A tired Rob opened the door, your eyes drifted over his whole body and you internally kicked yourself for it , over the past year it's been a habit to check Rob out but you couldn't let yourself, he was your best friend you weren't allowed to have a crush on him, of course no one but Charlie knew about those feelings so thank god you kept it secret.

"Hi girls, come on in." He said in a groggy voice. "Any drinks, food?"

"Rob it's 1 am we all just want sleep." Kim said walking in first.

"R-right I'll take you all upstairs to your rooms I'll show you around tomorrow." And then Rob took you to your rooms, before going back to sleep.

The next morning you woke up quite early, you went downstairs looking for the kitchen, still in your pyjamas which were booty shorts and a vest, you found the kitchen easily and then took out your phone and played some music on shuffle quietly while you made some coffee. You turned around to find Rob was standing in the door way.

"Morning." You said with a smile.

"Good morning." He replied. "How come you're up so early?"

"I slept on the plane and at the airport so I wasn't actually tried."

"Ah okay, I wish I could sleep on planes but with Rich it's hard to."

"You guys really are a old married couple." You stated picking up the coffee that finished brewing. "Coffee?"

"Please." Rob said, he was also wearing his pyjamas matching top and trousers.

"You look like such a dad." You said handing him his cup of coffee and sitting down at the breakfast bar opposite him.

"How so?"

"You sleep in a matching shirt and pants."

"Well if I'm a dad I'd tell you to put more clothes on because otherwise Rich will perv on you." He said and quickly you thought did Rob check you out? "L- Like I- we both know Rich is the type of guy to perv on someone so like beware." He said and you thought of course Rob didn't check you out how stupid are you he's just looking out for you.

"Yeah but it gives me a self esteem boost." You said and both of you laughed.

"Hungry?" Rob asked hearing your stomach make noises.

"Very much so, I haven't eaten since yesterday morning."

"Wow let's eat breakfast then." Rob said standing up. "What would you like?" He asked.

"What do you have?"

"Umm.." Rob thought looking in the fridge. "Nothing, I guess someone needs to buy groceries." Rob said returning to his seat.

"Damn, if you want I can go I just need to shower first." You suggested Rob thought for a bit.

"That would be great we can go together, I'll need to shower and stuff too so why don't you finish your coffee I'll go get ready and then you can get ready ect."

"Sounds good." You said and Rob went to get ready. By the time both of you were ready some people were already downstairs looking for something to eat.

"Okay Y/N and I are going to buy food any request?" Rob asked Kim , Briana and Osric.

"Beer," Briana said.

"Alcohol," Kim added.

"Food." Osric added.

"Okay, bye guys." Rob said. You guys took the rented car - that you all chipped in for to have a car this week - and went to the closest large grocery store, the car ride was mostly comfortable silence you and Rob listening to the radio. It was nice because you both have a similar music taste so there was never fights over what to listen to. When you got to the store you walked around picking up different food items, you were at the meat section and Rob was picking stuff out, you picked up the bacon and put it back in the freezer. "Wait why?" Rob said slightly offended.

"Follow me." You said and he did so you walked over to the fruit section, you picked up a melon and walked over to Rob who was watching you while leaning on the trolley. "Smell this." You said holding it up to his nose and he gave you a "mmm" while smiling.

"Now can I have the bacon ?" He asked with an adorable look on his face.

"Nope," you said putting the melon in the trolley. "Because bacon is bad for your heart." You said poking his chest. "And plant based diets have been proven to help unclog your arteries and help prevent , heart disease, cancer and diabetes while bacon causes Cancer, meat causes diabetes ect and I'm not letting you have another stroke Mr, so instead of bacon for the next week you're eating healthy breakfasts." You said proud of yourself that you are taking care of Rob.

"Thanks for looking out for me, what would I do without you?" Rob said sounding suspiciously sarcastic.

"Be bored out of your mind." You said turning around to pick some other fruit up as Rob laughed. Then all of a sudden Rob felt somebody poke his back.  "Robert! Fancy seeing you here." The tall man greeted him.

"Jeremy? Oh my god it's been forever, how are you man?" Rob said to his old high school buddy giving him a hug.

"I've been good, are you coming to the reunion?" Jeremy asked Rob.

"Yeah, actually it's the reason I'm back in town." Rob explains you shyly walked back to him and put the fruit in the trolley. "We're just here for some groceries, Y/N this is Jeremy a old buddy of mine." Rob said to you.

"Nice to meet you." You said shyly shaking the mans hand and then standing next to Rob or more like hiding behind Rob because meeting new people is all kinds of anxiety.

"Likewise, I've gotta say you two are cute together, I saw you two earlier with the melon and the first thing my wife Susan said was aw they're cute and then I realised it was you Rob." Jeremy explained and you smiled shyly waiting for Rob to explain you guys aren't together but instead Rob put a arm around your waist pulling you closer to him and said "Thanks, she's been trying to make me eat healthy, I'd die without her." Rob said with a chuckle looking at you with his signature grin and you laughed shyly. Jeremy said his goodbye's and you and Rob finished off shopping not talking about the incident, later in the car after spending $350 on only a week groceries you were in a comfortable silence when Rob spoke up. "Y/N..." He started unsure.

"hm?" You replied.

"I- I I have a question... Actually a favour to ask .... Well most people from my high school got married, and have kids or are engaged or something while me , nothing, can you come to the reunion with me and pretend to be my girlfriend?" Rob asked you looking at you for a second before returning his attention to driving.

"eh Rob, you are a successful actor and musician, everyone will be jelous of you already, but umm sure I'll be your fake girlfriend." You said wishing the word fake wasn't part of that sentence. You looked over at him and he was smiling as he said. "Thank you."

---

The next day you woke up early however this time Charlie was awake too, you promised her last night to explain what happened with Rob but you didn't have any alone time until now.

"Morning." You said turning towards her.

"Hey, okay tell me." She said.

"What?"

"The Rob thing."

"Right, okay so: we were buying food and this guy from his highschool came up to him and said that we were a cute couple." You said sitting up.

"Right is that it? I waited for hours for that?"

"No, Rob like didn't deny we are a couple and then in the car he asked if I will be his fake girlfriend for the reunion." You said.

"Oh no." Charlie said fully aware how this will affect your feelings.

"So I said yes." You said not making eye contact with her.

"No, no, no this will destroy you."

"I know." You said looking at the floor.

"Why are you doing this to yourself? You're just hurting yourself pretending that you guys are together when you're not." She whisper shouted at you.

"I know, I know, but this is the closest I will ever get to being with him, and maybe being his fake girlfriend will be awful which will destroy my crush meaning that only good comes out of this bad situation." You tried to reason.

"No." Charlie said. "You know you're just lying to yourself."

"What am I meant to say Charlie? There's nothing I can do, he doesn't like me, I wish he did, but he doesn't, he gave me the opportunity to date him for one afternoon of course I'm gonna take it." You explained standing up and picking up clothes to go take a showing change into them.

"Your just being pathetic." Charlie said.

"Conversation over." You said walking out the room.

"You're pathetic Y/N grow a pair." Charlie shouted behind you.

"Yeah love you too." You shouted back not realising that both Rob and Osric were standing hearing the shouting since you left the room.

After you took a shower you put on some shorts, a T-shirt and a checkered shirt on over the T-shirt. The shirt used to belong to Rob months ago but when you once mentioned "this outfit would look good with a checkered shirt." He gave you his and told you to keep it to make that outfit look better, you wore it with loads of outfits because it looked good.

You walked downstairs to the open plan kitchen and living room where you saw Osric, Charlie, Rob and Rich sitting around the whole area. When you walked in Charlie got up from her seat at the breakfast bar that was opposite Osric and made a B- line for you.

"What do you think you're doing?" She whisper shouted at you leading you back to the hallway away from everyone.

"Getting some coffee and breakfast." You said in a normal voice.

"You know what I mean." She said whisper shouting still.

"No I don't Charlie." You said slightly pissed off.

"You're fucking wearing his shirt, it's like you're trying to hurt yourself." She whispered less aggressively showing you that she just cares for you.

"So? It's my life Charlie! So stay out of it." You shouted too loud.

"Y/N I'm just trying to look out for you seeing that you're behaving like a fucking child." Charlie said matching your volume now you were sure everyone could hear.

"You know what I'm done!" You said harshly turning around and going to put your shoes on.

"Y/N-" Charlie tried to reason with you.

"No, I'm done all I wanted to do is drink some coffee and you're harassing me about this since I woke up." You said tying your shoes.

"I'm not harassing you I'm trying to be a voice of reason because you are behaving recklessly!"

"Sure whatever." You said standing up and walking out the door.

You walked sulking to yourself, you didn't know anyone here it was okay they could see you crying. You walked for about twenty minutes before walking into a park, it had the usual stuff, swings, a slide, a sand pit and a climbing frame however if you walked on a bit there was a skate park. You decided to sit on the top of the half pipe. You took a little run up to not fall trying to sit at the top. You sat there, legs hanging off the edge as you lay back starring at the sky.

Only minutes past, you're eyes blood shot with tears, you hated yourself for liking Rob it made everything so much harder, you were shocked when you heard a little sprint, you sat up to see Rob slip trying to get to the top of the half pipe, he got himself up as you giggled slightly and finally successfully got up and sat next to you not saying a thing.

The two of you looked into each others eyes, Rob looked slightly out of breath, but neither of you said a thing, you shut your eyes tight not allowing yourself to cry anymore, your biggest crush is sitting in front of you and you can't kiss him, hug him do anything because you're friends and the worst thing ever would be to loose this friendship.

Surprising you Rob put his arms around you pulling you in, your head being buried on his chest as he held you tight and placed his chin on your head, you felt safe for a second before remembering this is just a friendly gesture because you were sad. Rob still didn't say anything he just held you as you cried a bit into his chest, when he realised your crying again he said "shhh, you're okay." In the most calm and gentle tone, following it up with "shh, shhh everything will be okay, just please stop crying baby." Your heart paused "baby?". Rob's heart also pause as he thought "shit, shit" he wanted to call you his, he wanted to be affectionate with you but he knew you're never going to be more than his best friend, after all he is nearly double your age, he isn't the most attractive guy and you even hesitated on being his fake girlfriend. He carried on shushing you and telling you it'll be okay until you finally stopped crying but stayed in that one position.

"Rob?" You quietly asked.

"hm?" He chimed.

"How did you find me?" You asked.

"Well I knew you like to go to parks and sit on the swings so I sprinted to the closest park I knew of, and you weren't on the swing so I decided to walk around the park and I noticed you here." He explained.

"Thank you." You simply said hugging him tighter, before letting go and pulling away. "I'm sorry I soaked your shirt." You said looking at his chest that was stained with your tears.

"It's okay." He said giving you a gentle smile. "Are you okay?" He asked as you two sat next to each other looking down at your feet that were hanging over the edge.

"I'm better than I was."

"What happened?" Rob asked.

"Well, Charlie said something I did was reckless, it was but I wanted to do it, so she tried to protect me but I'm dumb and I ruin everything and ugh I just, I messed up, my head's messed up, it's all a mess." You explained best you could.

"Well I think you're a cute mess, come on I know something we can buy to make today awesome, instead of miserable." He said casually.

You and Rob went to a shop that was nearby and bought loads of pool floaties, you carried them all back home and as soon as you got back you started to blow them all up.

"What's going on?" Osric asked walking into the living room.

"We're blowing up loads of floaties." Rob casually replied.

"Mhm, we can see that Robo the question is why." Rich chimed in.

"For the lake." You answered.

"We're all going to go out on the lake and just have fun." Rob added.

-- When you got changed into your red bikini and got outside most people were already there. Rob, Matt and Osric were all in the lake while Charlie, Rich and Briana were on the side, Charlie reading a book, Briana and Rich sunbathing.

When Rich noticed you walk outside he whistled. "Y/N you look amazing, red is your colour, doesn't she look smoking Robbie?" He shouted.

"Y-yeah she looks great, come on in the waters  warm." Rob shorted from a float.

You were happy they couldn't see your face clearly as it was burning a bright red that matched your swimming costume. The water was in fact warm. When you got in the water it was feel so you decided to swim towards Rob's float and flip him. You approached slowly as he was relaxing now looking up at the sky, when you were close you were ready to flip him but Rob was clever and knew your plan all along so he was able to splash your face with water. That made you retaliate, you decided you'd jump and attack him off of his float, it lead to him falling in the water pulling you under with him, when you both swam up you jumped on the float at the same time as he did, leading to Rob lying on top of you faces inches apart. The two of you froze.

"Now this, this is comfortable." Rob said making you giggle.

"Get off of me you're heavy." You complained while you giggled.

"Oh so you'd prefer to be top, huh?" Rob said suggestively ending by chuckling.

"Ye- uh, no, fuck." You said laughing along with Rob.

"Now I'm intrigued what the answer is." Rob said still laughing.

"No answer." You simply replied.

"Only one way to find out eh? Let's take this to the bedroom." Rob chuckles winking at you and you laughed thinking that this was too much for you . You pushed him off playfully, into the water before submerging yourself in to, when he swam up he saw you swimming to the edge of the lake. You got out the water picked up a towel and went inside without a word. Charlie was watching this interaction and decided to stand up and follow you inside.

She found you on the bedroom floor crying. "Y/N, it's okay, please don't cry." She said wrapping her arms around you.

"No, you don't get it I can't do this it hurts too much." You whispered.

"I know, I know that's why I wanted to stop you earlier, that's why I said this whole trip was a bad idea." She was still comforting you.

"Thanks... I just," you said moving to sit normally without her hugging you as you drapped the towel over your own shoulders so it could supply some warmth. "The best I've ever had is just a daydream of my dreams, but I want more, but I can't have it , and I don't know how I cope with this." You explained.

"Tell him, maybe, see if it's mutual and if it's not you'll know that it won't work removing that little bit of hope."

"No, I don't want to, I like that hope, but I don't like my feelings."

"Just ignore it? I don't know pretend it's all fake feelings." Charlie suggested and you wiped the tears out of your eyes.

"I'll try." You sat there thinking, in silence just looking at the floor as Charlie looked at you when there was a faint knock on the door. Both of your heads snapped and Charlie stood up to check who it is. "Oh hi Rob." She said opening the door and you looked at him instead of the floor, he was still in just his swimming trunks.

"I'm sorry am I interrupting you guys?" He asked

"Oh, I was just leaving." Charlie said walking out the room. No one said anything for a moment and then Rob sat down opposite you.

"Hi." He said with a small smile.

"Hi." You replied with a shy smile.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah." You answered unsurely.

"Are you sure , this is the second time you walked away I'm starting to worry."

"Don't it's just me being stupid."

"Did I- I upset you somehow because-" You could see how genuinely worried he was that he might've upset you and it made you fall even more.

"No, Rob you didn't do anything wrong."

"You sure?"

"Positive." Rob stayed some time changing subject as you two sat and talked until Osric came looking for Rob because Rich broke something downstairs.

"You coming down or staying upstairs?" He asked from the doorway.

"Well I need to get dressed so I'm not walking around in a bikini and then I might come down."

"I like your current attire." He said chuckling and sending you a wink.

"Rob!" You shouted throwing a pillow at him. "You pervert." He laughed raising his arms in a surrender before walking out. You got changed and then sat down on your bed breathing out deeply only five days left.

Part 2 | More Rob

TAGS (let me know if you want to be added or removed): @waywardswain @supernatural-everyday @winchestergirl-13  @livingthelifeofafangirleverday @natasha-cole @girl-next-door-writes @itsfunnierin-enochian @rblstrash @shanghai88

[natasha-cole]

How would you feel about a flangsty Rob piece where Rob regrets being away from his family so much? You're doing great Babe! Thanks!

First Time for Everything

Summary: Rob is feeling like a failure. He’s certain he’s the worst husband ever and an even worse father for missing literally every big moment in his child’s life. A little surprise could turn his entire weekend around though.

Word Count: 1066

Warnings: slight angst, fluff

“She started crawling?” Rob asked, a hint of sadness in his voice.

“Yeah, she’s doing really well too,” Y/N replied.

“And I’m missing it. I’m missing all of the big stuff.”

“There will be other firsts.” Y/N reminded him.

“Yeah, I’ll probably miss those too,” he said. Rob let out a long sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration. Y/N frowned at him, feeling bad that she had even said anything.

“You know, Facetiming with you just makes me miss you both so badly,” he continued. He looked at her through the screen with a sad expression.

“I know honey,” she replied, feeling bad at how sad he was. “But, we’ll be together soon. And you’ll get to see how well she can crawl.”

“It’s not the same,” he mumbled in reply.

“I’m sorry Robbie.”

“I just wish the two of you were here with me. I don’t get to see you enough.”

“We’ll be together soon.”

“I could just tell everyone I’m leaving, go home and kiss you and hold our little girl.”

“The convention would fall apart without you,” Y/N reminded him.

“Speaking of,” he said quietly, “I’ve got to go. Time to introduce Ruth.”

“Okay, we will see you soon. We love you.” Y/N held up their daughters hand, helping her wave to Rob and he blew the two of them a kiss before ending the call.

Rob remained in a bad mood for most of the day. He just didn’t feel like he could have any fun now that he was thinking about his wife and daughter back home. He was even more grumpy over the fact that he knew that his crazy work schedule was forcing him to miss the important moments in his daughters life. He had missed seeing her crawl for the first time, and the first time she smiled. He had even missed out on the first time she was sick, only able to comfort Y/N over the phone as she tried to handle a sick baby on her own. Most dads would be thrilled to not have to be a part of something like that, but Rob desperately wanted to be there for those things. He wanted to be there to help Y/N get through those moments.

“We’re up,” Rich said as he headed for the stage with Matt. Rob followed, not ready to do their panel today. He was too sad and busy feeling like a failure.

The band played them on, and Rob immediately went into actor mode, trying hard to not let it be known that he was feeling so terrible.

It didn’t help that they got a few questions about their families. Rob choked up as he listened to Matt talk about his son and how amazing it had been to hear his first word and to see him walk for the first time and how all of those little moments meant more to him than anything. Rich added in his two cents; discussing his boys and how proud he was of them.

Rob talked mostly about what it had been like for him the day his daughter was born. He had at least been there for that moment, and it would always be at the top of his list of the most important moments of his life. He wished that he could say more, but he only felt worse when he thought about what a failure he had been as a father and a husband so far.

Rich moved on to the next question, pointing to the opposite side of the room.

“I have a question for Rob.” Rob squinted, moving to that side of the stage to try to see who was talking. For some reason, he recognized that voice. Despite the fact that the sound of it made his heart race, he knew he had to be wrong. But, he tried to focus, unable to make out who was talking.

“Um, I was wondering if your daughter and I could get a hug.”

Rob tilted his head, caught off guard by the question. It was then that he knew he had been right about her voice.

“Y/N?” He breathed out.

“Yes,” she chuckled.

Rob wasted no time. He rushed off the side of the stage, moving quickly toward his wife and daughter. As he got closer, they came into view perfectly now that the stage lights weren’t shining in his face. He wrapped his arms around them without a word, tears forming as he held them finally. It had felt like ages since he had held them.

“What are you doing here?” He asked. He kissed Y/N and moved to place a kiss to his daughters face. She laughed, reaching out to him. Rob immediately scooped her up, holding her close as the audience ‘awwed’ in unison. “When did you get here?”

“You’ve been having a hard time with being away from home, I figured we’d come to you. We got in this morning, it was hard to act as if we were still at home. But I wanted to surprise you.”

“I missed you so much,” he replied, voice cracking.

Their daughter reached up, grasping her hands in Rob’s beard and tugging at it, causing Rob to laugh.

“Dada,” she squealed with delight.

Rob’s eyes grew wide, tearing up even more.

“Did- did she just-?”

“Yeah, she just said her first word,” Y/N replied before he could finish his thought.

“You taught her to say ‘dada’?” He asked.

“I didn’t,” Y/N replied, looking surprised herself. “She said her first word… and you were there for it.”

“Thank you,” Rob felt a tear slip down his cheek and he wiped it away, embarrassed that he was getting so emotional in front of all of these people. “I know you don’t like to come to these things, especially since she is so little still.”

“There’s a first time for everything,” Y/N replied as she leaned in to kiss him. “Besides, I had a feeling you’d need your girls with you this weekend.”

“You have no idea how much I needed this,” Rob said as he held his wife and daughter tightly. He knew it wouldn’t be a constant thing, to have them with him during work weekends; but for now, he was going to savor the moment.

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