#sometimes i ​wish i could get a little robot or something to write all my ideas so i don’t have to lol

[barefoot-joker]

Destined for Heaven, Stolen by the Devil~ Yandere!Lucifer X Reader

Hey, guys and welcome to another Lucifer story. I'm sorry I write for him a lot. I just find to him be a very relatable character and I love him so much! Anyway, this fic deals with heavy Christianity themes, so I did my best to research. If something is wrong, please tell me and I'll do my best to fix it. I was very inspired by the song 'The Plagues' from "The Prince of Egypt". As always, I hope you enjoy and have a great day/night!

Words: 2899

Warnings: Heavy Christianity Themes/Beliefs, Swearing, Christianity Mocking, Slight Possessive Tendencies, Reader's Aunt likes crystals, Reader Dies, Kidnapping?

I sighed as my mother pulled a light blue cardigan over my shoulders. She dusted off my dress and fixed my hair so that I looked presentable. Today was Sunday so that meant we had to go to church. I wasn’t too fond of going and I would have rather been playing in the backyard as a twelve year old does. However, my mom made it her duty to take me and make me a good Christian girl. “Why do we have to go, mom? It’s soooo boring!”

I stuck out my tongue at her. She gently pushed it back in. “You know I want our family to have a good relationship with the Lord. It’s our Christian duty. Besides, going to church is in your blood. After all-”

“Yeah, yeah. God told you that I was destined to be a wife for Adam. How can you believe that? It came to you in a dream.”

“Y/n M/n L/n! You do not question God’s ways! You know better! Now come on, we don’t want to be late.”

Dragging me by the hand, she ushered me into the family Cadillac and sped off. I sighed heavily. There were so many things I’d rather be doing than go to church. I could be with my friends, heck I could be at my cool Aunt’s house. “Hey, mom?”

“Yes, dear?”

“When are we going to visit Aunt Hailey? When she called you said we’d be seeing her soon.”

“I only said that to get her off my back. You know how I feel about her.”

I grunted and crossed my arms. Aunt Hailey was seen as the black sheep in the family all because she was wealthy. A lot of our relatives (my mother included) thought she sold her soul to the Devil in order to be immensely rich and refused to interact with her. I, however, thought she was so cool. When she used to come over she’d regale to me hundreds of stories about her travels around the world. She even showed me her cool crystal collection when we went over to her house a few times. “Now don’t be like that. It’s not ladylike.”

I grunted again and slid down in the tan leather seat. A few minutes later the car was parked in the church parking lot and I was being dragged inside. Sometimes I wish I had siblings so I wasn’t the only one to feel mom’s wrath. She seated us near the front and handed me the heavy white Bible from the pew. I robotically turned to the page with the Lord’s prayer and stood when Pastor Bob entered. We began reciting the Lord’s prayer and sang a hymn before we sat. I didn’t pay much attention as our Priest told us his sermon for the day but I didn’t dare to look around the room. I had to look the part after all. Fidgety, I played with my ring finger. Glancing down, I took in the birthmark that oddly looked like an apple. I remember it showing up after I stayed at Aunt Hailey’s house one day. I never told my mother about it though. I was often reminded of the tale of Eve and the apple and I don’t know what she would do if ever saw the fruit insignia. After the sermon and another hymn, it was time for communion. We all stood in line and when it was my turn I took the small Ritz cracker and ate it. I coughed lightly and then took a sip from the golden chalice. My mom and I returned to our seats and when everyone was done, we recited the Lord’s prayer one final time. Thank goodness it was over. 

As we walked out, I was forced to shake hands with our elderly Pastor. “How is my favorite little disciple doing today?”

I cringed at that. Ever since my mother told the church of her insane dream I was treated like some goddess. “Good.”

“That’s great to hear. I look forward to our weekly blessing.”

“Of course, Pastor Bob,” my mom butted in, “we wouldn’t miss it.”

He smiled and bid us both ado. We walked back to the car and drove home. As we passed by houses in our neighborhood, I looked longingly at the kids playing. Besides church, Sunday was dedicated to my education of becoming a housewife so when I did die and go to Heaven I was prepared. Parking the car, we went inside. I slipped off my Mary Janes and put them by the door. The rest of the day was spent cleaning, doing embroidery work and cooking. Just as I was getting ready for bed, the phone rang. I went into the kitchen and picked up the landline. “Hello?”

“Is my dear Y/n there?”

“This is her.”

“It’s your Aunt Hailey.”

“Auntie! Hi! How are you?”

She chuckled. “I am good, my darling. And you? Surviving another day in that stuffy house?”

I giggled at her commentary. “I’ve been okay. What can I do for you?”

“I was wondering when you can come over. I was talking with a friend the other day and he would like to meet you properly. I believe he saw you at my house when you were five.”

“I’d love to come over! Let me ask mom real quick.”

I walked into the living room and pressed the phone to my chest. “Hey, mom. Aunt Hailey’s on the phone. She wants to know when I can come over.”

She looked up from her book and glared at the phone. “You know my answer.”

“Come on, mom! It’ll just be for a day!”

“I don’t know.”

“Please! I promise when I get back I’ll focus on my wifely duties! Please!”

I gave her puppy dog eyes and slightly whimpered. She sighed and rolled her eyes. “Alright. You can go tomorrow, but I expect you to stay true to your promise. You know how God would feel if you went back on your word.”

“Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you!”

I lifted the phone up to my ear and quickly ran into the kitchen. “She said I can come tomorrow.”

“Wonderful! I’ll see you then, my dear.”

“Bye, Auntie!”

“Goodbye for now, darling.”

I ended the call and put the phone back on the receiver. I returned to the living room where mom and I did our nightly prayer. When we finished, she gave my forehead a kiss and sent me to bed. 

The next morning I dressed in a plaid dress shirt, brown capri pants and black oxfords. I bounced in the passenger seat giddily as my mother parked the car in my Aunt’s gravel driveway. “Now remember to behave. I don’t need any calls about your disobedience.”

“I’ll be good, I will.”

“That’s my girl. And you have your cross necklace?”

“Yes, mom. Can I go now?”

She kissed my forehead and I got out of the car. “Be safe! Call me if something happens and I’ll be back around dinner to pick you up!”

“Okay mom, bye!”

I waved and she drove off. I turned towards my relative’s mansion and walked up the stone steps. I grabbed the handle from the golden lion’s head and gave three loud knocks on the large oak door. The door opened to reveal Timothy, my Hailey’s middle aged butler. “Ah Miss Y/n, we were expecting you. Please come in.”

He stood to the side and allowed me inside. Closing the door, he led me across the marble floor to one of the drawing rooms near the back. I could hear muffled voices talking as we entered, Timothy clearing his throat. “Your niece is here, madam.”

“Thank you, Timothy. That will be all.”

He bowed and exited the room. My Auntie smiled and gestured for me to come over. I ran to her and gave her a big hug. Her navy silk and lace dress clung to me. “It’s so good to see you, darling! I’ve missed you so!”

“I’ve missed you too!”

I pulled away and she motioned to the gold and floral print armchair next to her. I sat and looked at her guest on the chaise lounge. He seemed quite the esteemed gentleman. He had slicked back blonde hair, pale skin and red eyes. I found them quite odd but didn’t judge. Mother said it was bad to judge based upon appearances. He wore a white suit with a red dress shirt, a black tie with black flower detailing, black leather gloves and shiny black dress shoes. He was on the shorter side as well. “Y/n, I’d like you to meet my friend Luci. He’s the one to thank for my wealth.”

The man stood and bowed to me. He took my hand and kissed my apple birthmark. “It’s a pleasure to finally meet you, my little apple. Your Aunt has told me so much about you.”

“It’s good to meet you too, sir.”

“So polite. Your mother is raising you right.”

“Except for the amount of gospel she puts in my poor baby’s head. I swear all because of her fucking dream, she’s gone total Bible thumper.”

Luci titled his head to the side. “Oh you’ll have to tell me over tea. Speaking of which, I think Timothy has finished setting up the garden for us.”

“Splendid!”

We all stood and the blonde offered me his arm. I gladly took it and we walked outside to Hailey’s marble floored porch. A metal table sat in the middle overlooking her large flower garden, a lacy white tablecloth set on top. Luci pulled out my chair and after I sat, pushed it in. He sat next to me and began pouring tea for all of us. Today Timothy had picked out the clear glass kettle so we could see the yellow liquid inside and the pastel teacups. I thanked Auntie’s friend when he poured into my cup and marveled at the small pink flower floating. “I see we’re having chrysanthemum tea. You know it’s your Auntie’s favorite.”

I giggled and picked up my cup. Blowing a little, I took a sip and smiled at the sweet taste. “So you were talking about Y/n’s mother?”

“Ah yes. She’s always been a Christian woman, believing in the power above. Then one night she had a dream, a vision she calls it, that Y/n is to be the third wife of the first man Adam. Ever since then she’s been obsessively devoted and is dragging my poor niece with her.”

“I see.”

Luci seemed to become stiff at the mention of Heaven and God. Perhaps it was a touchy subject?

“So God came to her and said this, hm?”

“Sure as shit supposedly.”

The three of us sipped our tea in silence. “So has school been going, my dear?”

“Good, Auntie. We learned how to do cursive in English the other day so now I can write my name all fancy!”

“That’s great, darling. Anything else?”

“I’ve been feeling kind of left out lately.”

Both adults turned to me in curiosity. “How so?”

“Well none of the other kids my age are really learning wifely duties, at least not as much as me. When I want to go outside and play mom forces me to do my skills.”

“Wifely duties? Pray do tell,” Luci cocked an eyebrow.

“I learned how to clean the house from top to bottom, cook all three meals, sew, embroider, and do laundry. Basically anything my mom deems necessary to please this angelic husband of mine.”

“I can assure you it will come in handy. Especially with how much of pigish brute he is.”

“How do you know?”

“I just got that impression when I’ve read his passages in the Bible, sweetie.”

“Oh.”

“If you had a real man I can be sure you wouldn’t need those skills, darling,” Auntie piped up, sipping her tea.

“A real man? Like who?”

“Like Luci for example!”

I turned to the blonde and he smiled. His eyes glinted with what looked like adoration. He gently grabbed my hand and held it, his hands quite warm through his gloves. He brought it to his lips and kissed the back of my hand. “It’s true. If you were my wife you wouldn’t want for nothing. Every day would be spent in marital bliss.”

“Sounds gross!”

He chuckled and kissed my hand again. “When you’re older you’ll come to love it.”

‘If you say so.”

“I know so.”

The rest of the afternoon was spent listening to Luci’s tales from his travels while drinking our tea. They were quite intriguing and full of adventure. The people he met, the places he went were all so fascinating. It soon became dinner time and true to her word my mom sat in the driveway. Luci walked me to the door and gave a little bow. “It was a pleasure to chat with you, Y/n. I have a feeling we will see each other more in the future.”

“I hope so. You’re so cool, Luci!”

He smirked and patted my head. “Farewell, little lady.”

“Goodbye, Luci!”

I gave him a quick hug before running to the car.

Sure enough as I grew up I ran into the short blonde more often than not. From trips to the grocery store to when I was allowed at Aunt Hailey’s house, we would bump into each other. We’d always exchange a few words and always those red eyes sparkled bright around me. 

That was eleven years ago. Now I lay in a hospital bed, feeling like I was on the brink of death. A few years after meeting Luci I had gotten terribly ill. I was feverish, pale and felt nauseous. My mother was worried and took me to the clinic. I was just diagnosed with the flu. I took my medicine and stayed in bed as best as possible but the final straw was when I fainted in the backyard while gardening. Since then, I had been in and out of hospital with different doctors viewing me like prize cattle. I was poked, prodded and dug at only to be told no one had a clue as to why I was sick. It was like it had just fallen upon me. My mother became even more obsessive in her Christian ways. I was blessed every weekend and prayed upon every day to try and heal my mysterious illness. I was forced to drink holy water at every opportunity and had to wear my cross necklace with two rosaries. 

Currently, I was coughing so hard I felt like I dislocated my lungs. My mother sat next to me holding my hand, a rosary wrapping around us. As I continued to cough she pushed some hair out of my face. “You’re going to be alright, honey. Just stay strong.”

After my coughing fit, I laid back and tried to catch my breath. “I feel like I’m dying.”

Her hand tightened around mine and I could feel her body shake with sobs. “Maybe this is God’s way of letting us know Adam needs you. As much as I’d hate to see my baby go, you’d finally fulfill your purpose.”

“Mom, please. Not now.”

“I’m sorry.”

A knock at the door made us both look over. There in the entryway stood Luci, his white hat with the dark red band hanging tightly in his hands. “Come in.”

He stepped forward and gave a small smile. “Hey, how are you feeling?”

“Like shit.”

“Y/n! Language!”

“Sorry.”

He chuckled and came to my side, putting a hand on my shoulder. “May I have a moment alone, please?”

My mom looked at me and I gave a curt nod. She sighed and stood. “I’ll go get something to eat. I’ll be back later, honey.”

She gave my forehead a kiss and walked out, shutting the door behind her. Luci took her place in the chair next to my bed. “What can I do for you, handsome?”

“I wanted to come see you. Hailey told me how you were faring and I knew I needed to come immediately.”

“I appreciate that. Especially since I feel like this may be the last time you see me.”

“Nonsense. We will always find each other, even in death.”

He brought his hand up and caressed my cheek. I smiled and then began coughing. I turned away and hacked into my arm, only turning back when I was done. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be.”

His hand wrapped around mine and squoze tightly. “You know, I could end your suffering right now.”

“Yeah right.”

“I’m not lying to you, my dear. One small kiss and you’d go peacefully.”

“Luci-”

“And then we can be together forever. Adam, not even Heaven will keep you from me.”

“What are you talking about?” “Just kiss me.”

What could go wrong? I was already suffering so much.

“...Alright.”

He leaned forward and connected our lips. He tasted sweet like caramel apples and I just melted. My soul felt like it was being sucked out of my body and when he pulled away I couldn’t breathe. “You’re mine, little apple. Forever and always.”

He caressed my hand and my eyes closed.

The beeping of the heart monitor slowed and then faded to silence all together.

[kairiscorner]

i saw your miguel requests are open!! Yay!

Could you write a Miguel x f!reader where reader is a stubborn, confident daughter of a crime lord and Miguel is required to be her bodyguard even though she doesn't want anything to do with her father's work?

HI DEARRRRR OFC OFC !! sorry if the climax seemed so sudden, i just wanted to do something related to the third image on the header bc it looked so cute rgh ... anyway, hoping you like this !!

(reblogs are greatly appreciated, it helps get my content out there! if you guys like what you see, please reblog it too <:D)

bodyguard!miguel o'hara x fem!reader

the guy your father hired to protect you was... a real piece of work.

first of all, he was worse than your dad; he refused to let you do anything by yourself or go anywhere all alone, even in the most private of places. he sits close by you, or across you, while eating–he stands outside of the comfort room, standing all menacingly by your stall door and glaring down at anybody who walked by, and he'd decline invitations to anywhere fun and exciting for you in fear that you'd 'get all rebellious' on your father. "do you not know how to have fun? i'm starting to think you were, what, synthesized in a lab, never experienced wanting to have some excitement in your life?" you asked him sarcastically as he drove you home, with you at the front seat–your arms folded over your chest as you narrowed your eyes at your stoic-faced bodyguard.

miguel didn't budge and kept his eyes on the road; expertly driving without flinching or looking away one bit from the road ahead of you two. you raised an eyebrow and sighed, slumping further into your seat. "you're like the terminator, like, i don't even know if you kill people, but you're like him–a mindless robot that can only follow orders." you said with a huff. he finally spoke soon enough as you two hit a red light. "your father's paying me to follow orders, not to do anything else, let alone have idle chit-chat with his daughter." he said pretty bluntly and monotonously, making you groan exaggeratedly. "of course he would never pay for me to have a friend. he did when i was seven years old, though, that went to shit after a while, however." you blabbed as miguel looked at you from the corner of his eye.

"wait, of course, you don't wanna hear it." "no, no, keep talking, ma'am." miguel then blurted out himself. "that is... if you wish to keep talking." he added, distancing himself from you while still getting a little closer than ever before. you were surprised at how miguel was taking the initiative to talk to you, and you figured that since you had nothing better to do, why not tell this man your whole life story, thoughts, problems, and... just everything you've been keeping to yourself all this time. "fuck, i wanna leave home." you confessed to him as miguel slowed the car down, coming to a turn. "...and why's that?" he asked you, making you immediately shrug in response. "well, my dad wants to protect me and all, which, i'm grateful for, but... i don't wanna have a part in everything he does, i don't want... i don't want to do what he does, and i'm scared that, one day... i will end up like him." you confessed, tears streaming down your cheeks without you realizing. this has happened multiple times while you were alone, but never with anyone else–you'd sometimes cry without you realizing and mask it up, switch your emotions like flicking a switch on and off.

miguel, for the first time in a long while, turned his head to look at you and away from the road for a bit. he slowed down his driving and just... looked onto your scared, worried eyes that reflected just how fearful you were of becoming like your father. you were always so daring, rebellious, and confident to boot–you never showed fear unless it was a real, tangible fear you felt like it might come true one day if you weren't careful. he cleared his throat and looked up ahead, back on the road. "it's not my place to say anything regarding this matter, i'm not the most well-equipped person to have anything remotely helpful to say about any of this, but, um... you don't know that." he whispered those last few words in a small, creaking voice, not even sure why he's saying what he's saying; gulping back the already spoken words and shirking back in the driver's seat silently.

you sniffled back the tears you didn't realize you were holding in and looked at him quizzically. "...don't know what?" you asked him with a gentle voice, prompting him to finish his thought. miguel sighed and pulled up to the driveway, cutting through the dark evening with the bright lights illuminating from the luxurious car miguel drove you in and shut off the ignition, shifting in his seat as anxiety and nervousness filled his mind. "you... you don't know if you'll really be like him. you're not your father, you might not even become your father; you're... you. and, i like you for who you are, for all your snarkiness, cheekiness, you giving me a hard time all the time, i... i appreciate you as you are now." he finished, feeling his face get all flustered as he saw the way your eyes shone in the dark, how your tears from earlier glistened as the moon shone above and let light pour down upon your twinkling face. he got out of the car and went over to your door as usual to escort you out, but when he got close to your door, you left the window open and—as he got nearer towards you—you grabbed him gently by his tie, pulled him in close, and pressed your plush lips against his. you didn't know what you just did or why you even did what you did—but something about his words stuck to you and compelled you to... do some things you'd keep to yourself.

"i, um... thank you. you're... not as emotionless as i thought you'd be, i-i suppose..." you murmured silently as you pulled away from him and let his tie slip from your hands as you scooched out of the passenger and driver's seat, exiting out the door miguel left through; watching him stare at you with widened eyes and a bashful, surprised look on his face that made him think and ask himself, 'was that... real?' he merely nodded and kept clearing his throat as he stumbled away from the car, but fumbling the keys in his hands to lock the doors once he realized he forgot to do so. you swore you heard him mutter how 'soft your lips felt, how 'if your dad learned about that... there was no telling what'd happen to him', but most of all—you swore that he seemed softer, kinder, and a lot more vulnerable than before you kissed him.

he seemed so much warmer now, somehow...

this wasn't stopping you totally from overthinking all the time, though, it was good to know that he respected you as a person as opposed to some girl he was going to protect at all costs. but the reason why you kissed him... it sent your face to a furious fluster and made your brain short-circuit even remembering it all, made you weak in the knees and stutter a whole lot while thinking about it, looking forward to the next time you'd see him, for once.

tags !! @miguelswifey04 @hearts4gabri @hisachuu @wreakingmarveloushavok @fictarian @yuridopted0 @simsrandomstuff @luvstarrstruck @popeheywardssecretgf @meeom @arachnoia @melovetitties @fable-library @ophanimgold @smokeywhalee @capnshtfce

[classic80sand90smovieloves2]

totally feel free to ignore but what are some tips you have for writing? I rlly want to write x readers soon but idk how to start

Write for yourself: write what you want, when you want, for whatever reason you want, and don't let it become an obligation. It's hard to gain traction on a site like tumblr so you don't want to get discouraged by a lack of feedback/notes: which will probably happen if you're trying to write for others instead of yourself. Gaining fame should be irrelevant to you: it'll make you happier in the long run and save you a bunch of self doubt.

Read a lot. It can be whatever you prefer: fiction, nonfiction, fanfiction, etc. It simply helps to remind you what proper grammar, sentences, and characters look like. If you ever find yourself struggling to word things, take a break and read something else.

If you're creating a new blog to write on, reblog things to it or make unimportant posts on it immediately upon creating it. They can be things you'll end up deleting in the future, it really doesn't matter, it simply helps your blog be seen in the tags you're looking to post in quicker. Tumblr; at least when I started, has a sort of authorization process (for lack of a better term) where a new blogs posts will not be seen in tags until they've made a couple posts/reblogs. It's a sort of "prove you're not a robot" process that ends quicker by doing the aforementioned things.

Tag things properly and learn proper fanfiction terms.

Rewatching/rereading is your friend. Sometimes it's necessary to watch clips back again to see the little things that you might have missed on your first viewing. Even the smallest of interactions can really help to flesh out a character when writing for them.

Watch other films. There's only so many different kinds of character archetypes out there and finding similar characters to watch can help you come up with ideas for the ones you want to write for.

Don't limit yourself. Experiment with different kinds of fanfiction and see what works for you. You might prefer one type of fanfiction over the other or you might want to write different kinds. (i.e. look into the difference between imagines, headcanons, blurbs, etc.)

Don't force yourself to finish something. If you want to write ten different things all at once, don't force yourself to complete the post you're struggling with when you could finish two different ones in the mean time.

Give credit where credit is due. Don't grab a gif from a random place and claim it as your own or steal writing from somebody else (even if it's just a small segment). Always tag or link wherever you've found something and respect peoples wishes if they don't want you to use it.

Being self indulgent is part of the fun but try not to let it cloud your judgement when writing for different characters; especially if you're trying to appeal to an audience. There's a fine line between writing fanfic and making an oc out of preexisting characters: both are fine but if you're trying to appeal to the masses and/or be accurate, don't force things to fit just because you wish they were so.

That's all I got off the top of my dome so I hope that this helps! Good luck!❤

[kaylinalexanderbooks]

Personality through quotes

Thanks to @elsie-writes here and @mk-writes-stuff here!

Rules: provide a quote from an OC given a prompt

A quote about magic

Lexi: "I've always been a bit skeptical of the existence of magic. Personally, I think it's more beautiful and wonderful if things we consider magic are just nature or humanity. Alium is just an alternate reality where magic exists, but even then it's not really magic. Just different science."

Maddie: "Magic doesn't exist. Even in Alium, it's just science."

Ash: "It's classic to say magic is just science we don't understand, and I agree. Science is so fascinating. Studying telepathy as a science is interesting."

Gwen: "Just because you understand something as a science doesn't mean it's not magic. Magic is about wonder. Even in Ceteri, there are many wonderful, magical things to appreciate."

Robbie: "I kinda agree with Gwen here. I'm in the robotics elective at my school, and watching the little guys move... Boom, magic. Ash and Maddie are in their school's robotics club, and they tell me I shouldn't anthropomorphize the robots, but I can't help it!"

Akash: "Not sure about magic, but once in a lifetime friendships that rely on chance meeting is pretty close to it. In fact, anything amazing that happens by chance feels like magic, to an extent."

Jedi: "Alium does not have magic, per se, but there are many fascinating things about our world we do not understand. The revolution around our birthdays--two random ones at that. The existence of dragons. The workings of the portal. I wouldn't say magic is just science we don't understand, but science is in of itself magic because there's no reason for it to work the way it does other than the universe itself."

Carmen: "Pfft, we're debating magic again? Magic doesn't exist. Grow up."

A quote about the weather

Lexi: "I guess I'm glad I'm used to hoodies and don't get warm easily. Houston weather can get pretty warm and humid, especially in the summer."

Maddie: "I wish it didn't get so hot in the summer. I'd go outside a lot more than I do. I do enjoy watching the downpour through my bedroom window. Though when lightning strikes and takes out our power...that sucks. But it's kinda fun, in a way."

Ash: "I really like going outside when it's overcast. Sunburn and heatstroke is lower, and it's just generally nice to be outside without the sun ruining your vision. Thunderstorms are also super cool."

Gwen: "I feel like if I was born in a different family, I'd hate the outside. Staying in my room with a book sounds nice. But my family has a perfect place for a natural hike we go to near our house. So sometimes I read on the back porch swing. I like it when there's a nice breeze but not strong enough to where it blows the pages shut."

Robbie: "Life hack - avoid bad weather by never going outside! Unfortunately my parents are doctors and make Sammy and me go outside for Vitamin... Uh, C? It's C, right? Not confident about that. Whichever one it is, Sammy and I have prescribed Outside Time."

Akash: "If mobility isn't an issue, I like being outside. Warm, bright, sunny days with soft breezes are epic. Could be out there for hours. No need for prescribed Outside Time."

Jedi: "Hm? Oh, weather is nice, yes." (Goes back to his work)

Carmen: "... Weather sucks. I would much rather spend my days inside. I definitely don't miss walking through the forest and seeing all the plants and animals. Recognizing certain individual creatures. Enjoying the breeze. The warmth... It's stupid, is what it is."

Your prompt: A quote about teaching or learning

Softly tagging @rickie-the-storyteller @mk-writes-stuff @i-can-even-burn-salad @willtheweaver @jezifster

@aziz-reads @ohnomybreadsticks @buffythevampirelover @dyrewrites @theeccentricraven

+ ANYONE ELSE

TSP intro

TSP tag list (ask to be +/-): @thepeculiarbird @illarian-rambling @televisionjester @finchwrites

@nebula--nix @literarynecromancy

[guttedwhxre]

Hello! I saw you took requests and wrote for Jesse! Could you maybe write where the and reader are together but Spann is a bit friendly with Jesse (because let's face it, we saw how she was in the movie, she definitely did things with Jesse like an assistant with benefits), and reader is trying to keep their cool while showing Spann that their not going anywhere and is in it for the long run?

Sorry if I didn't explain too well, but thank you for writing and take your time I know you must be busy I get sometimes it takes a bit so really no rush!

Thank you 🤗

thank you soo much for the request love, sorry for the wait <3

tw: none!

INCONVENIENCE - JESSE CROMEANS X READER

he knew you were in it for the long-run. of course you were, you’d learned every single one of jesse’s flaws and secrets, as he learned yours in turn. you were his rock, and he was your light. together you made a lovely couple, as shown by the heavy ring on your finger. you knew that your lover was desirable, he is a man of great power after all - it’s just a pain in your ass when the help tries to have their way with him. preston was dead for a reason, and you just wished he’d wise up and do the same thing to spann. 

the lingering looks and barely concealed touches were grating in your nerves. if you were a worse person you’d take one of jesse’s shiny knives, kill her, record it and show it to him as an early birthday gift but you know it’d only serve to piss him off - and yeah maybe you didn’t have the prowess to take spann on. but it still made your blood boil when she dares to try and subtly flirt. 

you were in his office, sitting on his desk as he sat in his office chair. his hand began to creep up your thigh and you smiled, fully ready to give him exactly what he wanted. then someone knocks at the door. 

“come in,” bleats jesse’s robotic voice, and in strides spann; seemingly a little startled at your presence. 

“mx. cromeans,” she says, smile with a little too much teeth. “i didn’t expect you to be in today,” you do your best to bite back a scowl. spann seems to quickly recover, icy eyes meeting yours. 

“i thought i’d surprise jesse,” you say, smiling at your spouse. “he’s never one to complain,” at this you feel your man scoot closer to you, hand wrapping around your waist. you smile wider, but spann is unphased. 

“right. well, i was wondering if mr. cromeans would like to join me for lunch,” she pauses, as you repress the urge to clench your fist. she smirks slightly, eyes falling on jesse. “there’s some things i’d like to discuss. about the company, of course,” smug bitch. you’re about to open your mouth to respond when jesse’s monotonous tenor interrupts you. 

“no. don’t ask again when i’m with my spouse,” it’s final. spann, ever the collected one, purses her lips and nods. 

“i’m sorry mr. cromeans-“ she begins to say, but jesse holds a hand up, typing something quickly out on the keypad he holds in your lap. looking down at it, you bite back a smile as he presses the ‘send’ key. 

“matter of fact, don’t ask again. if i ever need to speak with you about something, i will come to you. is that clear?” you’re trying to suppress your giggles but this is just too good. you hold a hand to your mouth and laugh quietly, squeaking when jesse pinches your side. you look down at him but his mask is still turned towards spann. the woman is looking down at the ground, suddenly meek. 

“yes sir. i apologize,” she quickly turns out of his office, tail tucked between her legs. you smile freely now, kissing all over jesse’s mask. 

“you told her, huh?” you coo, leaning forward to wrap your arms around his neck. his broad shoulders shake with silent laughter, you feel the rumble in his chest when he presses closer to you. 

“of course,” his machine says, his fingers tapping quickly against the keyboard. “i won’t tolerate any inconveniences when i’m with my love,” you feel his gaze from behind his gleaming mask and any fear you may have felt melts away. it’s you and him forever, despite what spann may think. 

“seriously though, i think i want her dead.” you murmur, and jesse throws his head back with rumbling laughter, squeezing you close to his side.

xoxo, babe 💋

[deep-space-lines]

re. your tags on that amazing gabriel/v1 comic: i'm not a biblical scholar but i AM a religious studies scholar and let me tell you that all your interpretations & the questions you bring up are super bangin. i love this so much. i wish i could send this to my 40 yr old thesis advisor (who IS a biblical scholar and also loves video games) but i would have to explain the gay sex game to him so . maybe not. anyway rest assured that there are biblical scholars in the world who would eat this shit up

oh ok so this is probably one of the coolest things anyone's ever said about my art ever. reading this brought back the joy of getting a graded essay back with a gold star sticker on it thank you

this is super validating honestly, & just the overall positive feedback on that comic-- not to get Personal but it's so much harder for me to post anything i put a lot of genuine thought/effort into as opposed to silly doodles because of the little voice in my head that says "what if everyone thinks this thing you poured a part of your soul into is stupid and bad forever". for me that gets amplified like tenfold with writing or anything where i'm actively trying to communicate something more complex. drawing something pretty is easy, but creating something that'll make an idea resonate with other people the same way it resonated with me when i'm not even sure it makes sense is HARD and i'm really glad i apparently managed to pull it off this time

so yeah thank you very much. i absolutely could not have predicted that buying the silly robot game a month ago would lead to someone saying "there are biblical scholars in the world who would eat that shit up" about something i drew but i'm not complaining. its scary but... maybe i'll start posting some writing on here sometimes <3

[theleafunderneath]

dear man i once loved,

by the time you read this letter, you will be completely devoid of my heart. however in the moment im writing this (november 2nd, 2023) you still have a place in my heart, unfortunately. i wish i could say i dont love you anymore. im not at that point yet. you dont know this but even before we had gotten together that id loved you for a year and a half, unconditionally and more. i was willing to put so much of my heart into you, and before i knew it, i already had. you know its bad when im frustrated and upset at you yet i still love you so much that i wanted to start this letter with “im sorry.” isnt that ridiculous? you break my heart unintentionally and yet still, IM the one who wants to apologize. because it feels as though im not enough to be somebody you could love irrationally. i know i can be overwhelming because my love is gigantic. perhaps even unattractive. maybe this is why i wasn’t worth fighting for. i hate that i still love you. i know you probably dont love me more than friends, hell maybe its just “like”. its just a shame that i had invested so much of my emotion into something you most likely never had your entire heart in. i know you tried your best, you had done as much as you believed you could for me. knowing the person that you are, even all the little things you had done for me counted tenfold more in my heart than they shouldve. youre not an emotional guy, youre like a robot. which is why it surprised me so much with what you gave me. for others its the bare minimum but me and our friends know that youre not the type to do anything like that at all. so i truly believed in my heart that you loved me. im grateful that i was plenty of your firsts. first girlfriend, first girl youd held hands with, first girl whod ever laid in your arms, first girl whos heard those words come out of your mouth. it was, and still is so incredibly special to me. in my head and in my heart we were the perfect match. our values aligned, you made me laugh like crazy, your faith and character made me instantly fall in love. you reminded me of a man who id want to father my future kids. somebody who i knew anyone would be lucky to have. and i was lucky enough to have you even if it were just a season of my life. whoever your next girlfriend is will be one lucky girl. i just wish i could get over you faster. my heart still makes my eyes follow you in a room. even after all ive tried looking away its like my heart is looking at you but my eyes arent. it still waits to see you in between classes. it was and still is so willing to do just about everything for you. everything for us. it hurts. it hurts when your heart is completely and utterly in love with someone. and it all crumbles in a matter of weeks. im sure you just don’t understand how i feel. but love is completely irrational sometimes. it makes you do crazy, stupid things. and i was stupid enough to put so much of my heart out only for it to be set to the side. thats how much i loved you. and i want to say i dont feel that way anymore but i know if you came back that id give my heart back to you in… a heartbeat lol. still, thank you for everything. as much as it hurts to love you, im glad i did. and im grateful for all that youve done for me. the friendship, the temporary “love” we shared, and all the memories.

love,

me

[soapisahimbo]

Hi, I’m totally the person that had no clue who konig was. I’m pretty new to this fandom and to writing these characters, do you have any tips on writing them? (I need total help writing anything about Simon he’s so distinct)

Oof, I mean I can try, I'm not really good with tips 😂 we'll go at them one at a time, yeah? Keep in mind that this is just my personal interpretation of these characters and that others might not agree to these at all lol

Soap can easily be written off as comic relief, and he is sometimes, but I think his humour and timing comes from a place of wanting to make others feel at ease, to calm the nerves. He wants others to see him as easygoing because he wants them to be comfortable around him. He's very friendly and very respectful of people's boundaries and does his absolute best not to cross them, and he also expects others to respect his. He's loyal to a fault and cares a lot about his teammates, which makes it that much more contrasting when he's faced with someone he doesn't trust. All that friendliness and warmth and banter is long gone. He's smarter and sharper than others might think, calculative and quick on his feet, adjusts and adapts quickly. A lot of people think he's just the clown of the team, but it's easy to be fooled, and he uses that to his advantage.

Simon is definitely a challenge to write. Just don't fall for the "I can fix him"-narrative. He's been through a lot of intense trauma and he's very hardened because of it. He's not going to just randomly open up one day - gaining his trust can be a long and arduous process, and while it is strong when gained, it's near impossible to regain when lost. He keeps even his closest people at arm's length, mainly for his own safety in case someone were to turn on him, because he knows that anyone can have the capacity to stab him in the back. He does care, though. He's not an emotionless robot, he just doesn't let much, if anything, show. If he does, it's subtle. He can also, kind of like Soap, revert to humour to ease tension and nerves, and it usually works, but not because his jokes are actually funny. His humour is just very dark and dry, and people are usually just surprised that he even makes jokes that it snaps them out of whatever anxiety they were feeling in the first place (he thinks he's a comedic genius). Otherwise he's very cold, very methodical, there is very little that can disturb him or make him uneasy. Shuts his emotions off and moves quickly on, even if he's hurting.

Gaz can also be a bit of a challenge, mostly because he tends to sit on the backburner for a lot of people in the fandom. Has a very strong sense of justice and fairness, wants to do good by his team, his friends, the world. Loyal to a fault, much like Soap, but not blind. He'll question even his highest superiors if he thinks something is amiss. Incredibly attentive and attuned to who and what's around him, very little actually passes under his radar. He's quite friendly though, and can crank up the charm when needed (or wanted). He's cheeky, likes to push buttons to see what elicits the funniest response, although he's careful not to take it too far. He doesn't need to try hard to make others feel at ease, they just do. Also gets underestimated because of his young age, and because others think he's Price's lap dog, but Price brought him into the team for a damn good reason. He's quite a force to be reckoned with.

Alejandro is... hot. And I don't mean that like "sexy", I mean that as like, his manners, his sense of justice, his morals - it's a constantly burning fire within him, and he gains people's loyalty by that fire. He warms others up by that fire. He always finds something to keep fighting for, and he wants others to find that as well. Complacency is humanity's biggest enemy in his eyes. He cares greatly about his team, knows every single person in Los Vaqueros by heart and would give his life to save even just one of them. He wishes he could spend more time with his family, but what he does, he does to keep them safe. He leans very much into that "traditional masculinity" of being the protector, not because he thinks he has to be, but rather because he wants to be. He knows all the telltale signs of a good fighter, and he knows how to turn the good into the best. Very courteous, very clever, almost irrevocably loyal, hot-blooded and strong. He's the guy you want on your side.

Rodolfo is honestly very tricky for me to write because there's not as much info on him as the other characters. He's quite similar to Gaz in a lot of ways - he wants to do good, he wants to help, he wants to leave the world a better place than it was when he entered it. Blindly loyal to Alejandro and to Los Vaqueros, but only because he knows with his entire being that they would never betray him. He's incredibly dependable and trustworthy, eager to fight what he considers to be the good fight. He can be quite disarming and very charming, a bit reserved, and rarely comes across as any sort of threat to anyone. He's calm, levelheaded, attentive and is the type to stand by quietly and listen and that is why, I think, he's also underestimated. But just like Soap, he's smart and sharp, and just like Gaz, he's a force to be reckoned with.

I think people tend to forget that König is actually terrifying. Yes, he has severe social anxiety and he tries his best to shrink himself down, but social anxiety is not the same as shyness, and he's been trained to be ruthless on the battlefield. Even if it can make him self-conscious, he knows how to use his size to his advantage, and he is frighteningly agile considering how big he is. He keeps to himself, with the exception of a select few that he sticks to, doesn't say much unless spoken to. Has a tendency to just loom over everyone without meaning to. He's also the type to stare, but only because he's paying attention and he forgets that a 6'10 giant hooded figure standing in the shadows like 🧍‍♂️is usually nightmare fuel to most people. His view on justice can be a bit skewed because he's been taught not to ask questions. He's been manipulated by his peers and superiors for their own ulterior motives and he's been trained to believe that he's just a tool to be used, so while he doesn't lack confidence, the idea of self-worth is not one he's very familiar with.

I don't know how helpful this is or if these can even be considered tips, but I hope it can be of some assistance at least 😅

[rav-rabies]

Hi Fi Rush Headcanons/ideas: pt 1 Heroes

got a few ideas bouncing around mostly just backstory stuff I wanted to write down to clean up my head and thought I'd share.

Pt 2

Possible trigger warnings: discussions of family fights, age gap relationships

Chai

Sun sign: Cancer, Moon: Sagittarius, Ascending: Sagittarius

Is smarter than he lets on

Grew up in a small town and got himself into trouble because there wasn't much else to do.

Never knew his father. He left home to pursue his dream of being a Rockstar and disappeared.

Chai created an idealized version of his father. Wants

Majored in Business as his mother wished but negotiated to study Music Theory as a minor. Got mostly A's and a few B's.

Quit school after being discouraged by an asshole professor and because he wanted to live his own life on his terms.

Couldn't find work after dropping out because ableism and struggled on disability payments.

Peppermint

Sun: Sagittarius, Moon: Capricorn,  Ascending: Virgo

Was an invitro baby and was conceived around the same time as Kale.

Roxanne and her husband had been separated for three years when there was an accident at the treatment center Peppermint's zygote was stored in. Roxanne was relived one of her zygotes survived and she and her estranged husband agreed to bring the child to term.

Her father died when she was barely a year old so she never got to know him.

Has a small tattoo of two intertwined violets on her back to represent Sapphic love.

More interested in environmental science and politics then robotics but was supported by Roxanne as both fields a line with her worldview.

Is planning on returning to school soon after her mother gets everything back on track at Vandelay.

Macaron

Sun: Libra, Moon: Taurus, Ascending: Pisces

Spent his vacation reconnecting with his old friends outside of Vandelay.

He was that kid who took things apart. His parents were great though and supported his interest. Just they made sure to redirect his curiosity towards lest destructive

First learned about Roxanne when he was finishing collage and wanted to become a part of something bigger. He was drawn to her ideas and drive.

Korsica

Sun: Virgo, Moon: Scorpio, Ascending: Aries

Had not been working at Vandelay long before Chai came along.

Had a tentative "friendship" with Zanzo due to both being bottom of the social hierarchy.

Has zero interest in Chai and Peppermint as romantic partners. Though that can change for peppermint. Her age is the only hurtle really. (NOTE: I do love this ship and have no problems with age gaps in shipping or sometimes irl. But, as someone in their thirties, I feel comfortable saying that we're not as inclined to date younger unless we're kind of immature like Zanzo or said 20 something is really chill.)

CNMN

CNMN doesn't need headcanons from me he's perfect as is.

Roxanne Vandelay (Heads up she gets Rose Quartzed a little)

Sun: Capricorn, Moon: Sagittarius, Ascending: Aquarius

She values altruism above all. She believes the purpose of creation in both science and the arts is to better the world.

Also values hard work and sacrifice, not to insane levels but again to the point she lacks some sympathy for those

Has a hard time accepting others as driven as her. She isn't actively mean but she's not very understanding of those with different values.

She and her husband both wanted to create a better world and fell in love while working for it. After Kale was born Her husband became devoted to his son. She believed both still/would support her vision and spent as much time with her family as she could and hoped love would be enough.

It wasn't. Overtime her son grew to resent his distant but caring mother and her husband grew sad and frustrated.

Arguments started and the rift got too big for anyone to ignore. She left.

After her husbands death Roxanne found herself a CEO of a rapidly growing company and a single mother to an unruly teen who just made a strange new friend.

[jerzwriter]

Off the Beaten Path

Book:                   Open Heart

Pairing:                Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Kaycee)

Rating:                 Teen

Category:            Fluff

Summary:   Getting stuck in traffic on the way back to Boston teaches Ethan that sometimes detours are the best things of all.

Words: 813

A/N: Day 7 of @creativepromptsforwriting 's 30-Day Writing Challenge: Use the words: small town, bar, jukebox. Also participating in @choicesjanuarychallenge Day 13 - It's sort of Sunny and Grump :)

Ethan x Kaycee Masterlist 30-Day Writing Challenge Masterlist

It was a late August afternoon, and Ethan and Kaycee found themselves driving on a country road somewhere in Pennsylvania. Ethan decided to get off the highway to avoid traffic some time ago, even though Kaycee told him they were bound to lose their GPS signal. But why should he listen to the Pennsylvania native? Now, she was doing all she could to suppress her giggling as she watched him coming undone.

“Siri! Get us back to I-95!!!!”

His exasperation was compounding as he yelled at the robotic device for the umpteenth time.

“One second….”

His hands clenched around the leather of the steering wheel, his knuckles almost white.

“Still searching….”

“Oh, this thing is….” a trail of barely intelligible curses followed.

“I’m sorry, nothing was found; please try again later.”

Kaycee turned away from him as he palmed the wheel, unable to contain herself anymore.

“And what, exactly, do you find so amusing?” He growled, attempting to prove something (though no one knew what); he tried to stay angry. But it wasn’t an easy task when she was so adorable.  

“There’s no GPS signal. I told you it would happen, and Siri’s told you four times. So, who is the foolish one here?” She grinned.

“Is it wrong that I expect things to work as they’re meant to?”

“No, but things aren’t always within our control,” she shrugged. “Besides, it’s nice to get off the beaten path sometimes. You never know what you find.”

“Really? What exactly should I be looking for.”

“A place to eat! I’m starving!”

“There are granola bars in the glove compartment.”

Kaycee rolled her eyes so hard she thought he might hear them. “I also have to pee. So granola bars aren’t going to help me.”

 “You’re impossible,” he chuckled through a good-natured sigh.

“Yes. I’m so sorry you have an eating, peeing girlfriend, Ethan,” she teased. “Clearly, you settled. Now, why don’t we go there?” She pointed to a little ramshackle building in the distance. “that place looks good.”

“Good?” He questioned. “Besides, it’s a bar.”

“Bar and GRILL, Ethan. You’re not in Boston anymore. Now pull over; I’m sure it will do fine.”

~~~~

The dimly lit, one-room dive looked like something out of a honky tonk movie, and while Kaycee looked intrigued, Ethan was aghast.

“Stop acting like you’re from the Brahmin, Ramsey,” she laughed, taking his arm. “I know where you grew up.”

“Fine,” he said, slipping into the wooden booth. “But it’s been a long time since I’ve been in a place like this.”

“It’s not so bad,” she shrugged. “Kind of takes me back to my childhood.”

“Kaycee… you grew up in Philadelphia.”

“Yes, but you forget, I spent summers with my grandparents on their farm, and they lived in a small town just like this.”

“I forget you’re so diversified,” he smiled.

“The best way to be!”

Fifteen minutes later, Ethan groaned with delight as he bit into a juicy cheeseburger.

“Still wish you were back on I-95?” Kaycee mocked.

“This is the best burger I’ve ever had!”

“Hmmm… and at a fraction of the price we’d pay in Boston. Sometimes we have to be happy that life takes us to unexpected places.”

His face softened as he reached over to wipe a bit of ketchup from her chin.

“You think I would have learned that lesson by now. I mean, look at us.”

“Exactly,” she beamed. “Look at us.”

When the meal was over, Ethan was no longer in a hurry to get back on the road, and Kaycee had the perfect solution.

“Let’s drop some dimes in the jukebox, and we can dance a little to work off the burgers.”

“Dance?” he asked, looking at her as if she had two heads.

“Yes, that thing we do with our feet….”

“I know what dancing is, Rookie! I just don’t know if I know how to do the kind of dancing one does here.”

Once again, she rolled her eyes as she grabbed her wallet from her purse. “It’s a two-step, love. If you managed to graduate med school, I think you can pick this up relatively easily.”

“Totally different skillset required.”

He startled when Kaycee fell into his lap, throwing her hands around his neck and lavishing him with kisses. 

“Dr. Ramsey, haven’t I proven the point already? Live a little. God, you’re so lucky you found me. I hate to think of what a boring old man you would have grown to be.”

“Hmm… and now you’re just aging me rapidly instead.”

“And that’s why we’re going to two-step,” she winked, taking his hand and leading him to the dance floor. “Keeping those joint limber… for other things.”

He let out a snort with an impish grin adorning his face. “You know what, I’ll agree with you on one thing. I sure am lucky I met you.”

Permatags: @a-crepusculo @animesuck3r @annoyingmillenialnewbie @crazy-loca-blog @differenttyphoonwerewolf @doriopenheart @fayeswiftie @genevievemd @gryffindordaughterofathena @inlocusmads @jamespotterthefirst @jennieausten @kingliam2019 @liaromancewriter @lucy-268 @onikalover @openheartforeverinmyheart @potionsprefect @quixoticdreamer16 @rookiemartin @secretaryunpaid @socalwriterbee @tessa-liam @trappedinfanfiction @jerzwriter-reblogs-asks @choicesficwriterscreations @openheartfanfics

30-Day Challenge: @mydemonsdrivealimo

Tagging others seperately

[brandnewhuman]

FACE IT

Starring:

Big sad robo boy Nines and his mean himbo human Gavin Reed

CONTENT:

Tw: description of panic attack, mention of suicide. Mature language, THERE'S ANGST BUT THIS TIME I HAD THE DECENCY TO ADD COMFORT DW. Gavin just being Gavin I guess and nines having big ass feelings

Summary: Gavin finally succeeds in his questionable attempt at make Nines vent

A/n: I'm having too much fun in my own little Dbh world lately. Kamcon has already gone through my atrocious writing so now it's reed900 turn. I WAS WATCHING I,ROBOT A FEW DAYS AGO SO YOU ALL KNOW WHERE THE ANSGT IS COMING FROM. Shout-out to @the-anxious-youth for helping me so much with this and for putting up with me and my Dbh brainrot bullshit lol. AND @hamartia-grander I TOLD YOU I WOULD TAG YOU SO HERE YOU GO, I HOPE YOU LIKE IT.

\\\

The car ride was uncomfortably quiet and it was driving Nines insane. He could feel the mean comment from Gavin coming and he found himself wishing he would just get over it and say it, to just start the inevitable argument that was about to happen. He hated that feeling, the gnawing dread of knowing someone was judging him and he couldn't do anything about it.

He couldn't for the life of him understand why the detective seemed to have all this hatred for him, considering he has been beyond patient and accommodating as a partner.

He knew why other people avoided him, why rooms seemed to quiet down as soon as he put a foot in them, he knew why everyone tried to avoid asking him anything as much as possible. He's scary, he's intimidating and unsettling, and he knows it. He also knows too that when people look at him they can't help but see Connor and then get disappointed when the similarities between his brother and him are just merely physical. He has learned recently after recent events that their physical likeness makes people ever more upset and avoid him.

But, sometimes, Gavin's behaviour towards him seemed to go so far beyond his distaste for androids, it felt personal. Every time they seem to get close to what one could call friendship something happens and they get to square one, getting at each other's throat and tearing apart all the progress they've made.

While normally it doesn't affect Nines too much, he had started to notice certain things the detective said seemed to cut through his wall of indifference, he felt hurt like really hurt all of the sudden and it only made him even more stressed.

Maybe it was his already heavy baggage of personal matters that was starting to catch on with him or maybe it was the fact that the detective's opinion mattered more than what he would like to admit, but he did find it increasingly more difficult to recover from his arguments with Gavin.

Admittedly lately, the reason for his annoyance towards the detective wasn't really about arguments or fights since they have been surprisingly sporadic nowadays. It was more about the detective trying to get some sort of reaction out of him for almost everything. Going out of his way to mind Nines's businesses and, rather rudely sometimes, doubt his deviancy.

Normally he would just deal with all of that by ignoring him and move Gavin's focus towards other things but today everything was going just… wrong. The day couldn't go any slower and the entire universe seemed hellbent testing his already thin mental stability. It shouldn't be surprising that Gavin would push it even further too.

"You're not gonna say anything tin can? I mean…that girl died in front of you and you didn't even flinch" His voice was unusually calm, somewhat tired. He kept his eyes on the road, a frown on his face as his grip loosened on the wheel.

"There's nothing to say detective, the android was going to self-destruct regardless. Besides, I don't make a habit of making cases a personal affair to me" the rk900 replied with his usual flat, matter-of-fact tone. He hated it, it only proved Gavin's point more. His eyes kept observing the empty night streets of Detroit outside the window. He wasn't sure looking at Gavin right now would make any good to his already foul mood.

The detective scoffed softly and shook his head. "So that's it for you, why care if they're gonna kill themselves anyway?" He retorted, his words didn't carry the usual harshness or spiteful tone that seemed to come so naturally out of Gavin. No, it was something even worse, it was disappointment.

The thing is, Gavin wasn't disappointed. If anything, he was worried, like he has been ever since Connor had been gone.

Nines was this unbreakable and unfailable force of nature who never took a wrong step or showed weakness, a perfect and balanced being always accomplishing every mission with a perfect score. And for the longest time, it made Gavin melt in pure fury, to see how everything he had worked so hard to achieve was so easy to do for Nines. Even if the android was guilty of Gavin's worst traits too he seemed to pull them off as something useful and almost admirable, while on Gavin they were just a list of his countless bad qualities that would always set him up for failure.

Now it was just sickening to see how much they share, how much of his self-destructive nature Nines seemed to have. He wasn't perfect, he was just ready to ruin his life to prove he could be.

He couldn't exactly pinpoint the moment he realised the unbelievable pressure the android put on himself but he knew that somewhere along the way he just couldn't find it in himself to be so hard with Nines on purpose.

He knew being such an ass right now was uncalled for but he recognised the signs of someone just bottling everything inside, he knew what would come out of it too and wanted nothing more than to spare it to Nines.

He needed to get it all out and Gavin knew that a more gentle approach would work on other people but not on Nines, so being an ass had to do it.

They had come to a point of what he would like to think of as more than just work partners (god knows that Nines had to endure too many of Gavin's personal and embarrassing moments to be just called a coworker) and to hurt his feelings was something Gavin was certainly not enjoying but he just kept pushing through it, telling himself that it for the sake of his beloved tin can.

"Do you feel fucking bad at least? Did you think about doing something?" He took his eyes off the road for a second to look at the android. His led has been spinning a steady red ever since they left the scene and honestly it was starting to scare the shit out of Gavin.

Suddenly Nines felt very self-conscious of his led but didn't feel like doing anything to change it besides tilting his head a little bit more towards the window.

"There wasn't anything for me to do." The android replied quietly. He just wanted to get home as soon as possible and forget everything about today.

He did feel bad, horrible even but he just couldn't bring it out and it was making him even angrier than it was making Gavin disappointed.

It was an easy case, something he could've handled without a bat of an eye but he froze. The android that was still there, hiding away in the crime scene, shot herself just when Nines and Gavin found her.

She was responsible for the body bleeding out not far from where she hid, there was no doubt. And she was…so scared. Even without interfacing, he was able to see this was a self-defence case, but she was terrified and even more when she laid her eyes upon Nines. That stare he would get from some people at the police station, that glance of fear, it was the same she was holding then. He was so close he could've stopped her but he just couldn't, something inside him, like a glitch, rooted him in place.

He couldn't explain why he didn't do anything, or rather he didn't want to admit why he just froze. One thing was certain, it wasn't because he didn't care

It had been too many things at once; she reminded him in some unexplainable way of Connor, of how he looked the last time he saw him. She reminded him of the androids that more often than not, upon seeing him, still seemed uncomfortable and intimidated. It felt like suddenly all that was making him feel bad became too loud and big to ignore it.

He knows how it must have looked from the outside, him just staring without doing anything to stop her from killing herself. But he was just struck down by a violent wave of really overwhelming and negative emotions.

Every time he closed his eyes all he could see was her body flopping to the floor and the thirium spluttering out of her head.

His led spinned a darker shade of red and he rolled slightly his shoulders to try and get some tension off.

Gavin's grey eyes trained forward, trying to not dwell too much on what he was about to say. "God…you really don't feel fucking anything don't you tin can? Are you even sure you're a deviant? Cause it sure doesn't seem like it" he breathed out, sighing a humourless laugh.

Nines's hands, which neatly folded on his lap, clenched slightly and his whole body tensed. "Detective Reed, I think I have made it clear that there was nothing else to do. The case has been closed" his voice was low and dark, it didn't leave any room to misinterpret what he meant with his last sentence.

"Why are you so defensive, uh tin can? Are you angry because the suspect got away? Is that it?" Gavin replied with his most sarcastic tone, swallowing hard as the tension grew inside the vehicle. He wouldn't let Nines's intimidation tactics stir him away, not this time.

"You said yourself, you don't get invested during cases so why are you so fucking aggressive about it?" He stole a glance at the android, the window reflecting a very dark and concerning red light from his temple. "Why don't you fucking say the truth? I felt worse than you and it's not even one of my own"

"Detective Reed, you're deliberately twisting the situation more than-"

"No cause everyone gives me shit for being insensitive or rude but you-" he breathed out a bitter laugh "you get the fucking shit cake of insensitivity. A girl kills herself in front of you and you just fucking get over it like nothing"

"Detective, It's enough."

"All those fucking emotions you say you have, are they even there?"

"Reed, you're pushing it." The android muttered through gritted teeth. His jaw piece could've snapped from how hard he was clenching it.

Gavin could swear that if Nines needed to breathe his breaths would be laboured from anger, but he couldn't stop "why? Why should I care? You didn't give a single flying fuck, why should I then?"

"Gavin."

"Admit it!! Just fucking say it!! Stop pretending to be a fucking person and just get over it and fucking admit it!!" The man demanded. His voice matched Nines's in intensity, his knuckles turning white from his tight grip on the wheel and his shoulders tense under the pressure of the imminent outburst on the android's part.

"Shut up…shut up shut up SHUT UP!" Nine's usually flat voice seemed unnatural when he shouted, his head snapping towards Gavin with a murderous look in his eyes. He was glaring at Gavin with such intensity he would've expected the man to just start to burn spontaneously. He could feel every beat of his thirium pump inside his ears and his HUD was flooded with flashy and red warnings of high-level stress.

Gavin flinched slightly at the sight and thanked God he was able to stop the car since they were on a relatively isolated road, he didn't trust himself to keep driving. He felt incredibly small now against Nines rage, mostly because he was caught by surprise rather than from actual fear.

"I do care!! I don't fucking understand why is so vital for you to know but I do!! I feel SICK I can't even fucking think properly because all I hear is her bloody head getting blown off!!" The rk900 upper lip twitched with anger with every word, his hands were now closed in fists. His eyes were no longer a light calm blue but rather a darker and angry one.

"I don't what the fuck have I done to you to be always so hellbent on tormenting me with the most hurtful things Reed but I'm. Done. YOU HEAR ME?! Done." His voice trembled lightly and his eyes sported what seemed the glossy tells of blue tears.

All Gavin could do was watch and let him talk, flinching slightly every time Nines raised his voice. He was afraid that if he tried to interrupt the android would just try to recollect himself as always so he did his best to not just blurt out a string of apologies.

"I'm. Not. A. Bad. Person." Nines hissed, his lips trembling with every word, struggling to not let his impending tears make him stutter. "I know what I was created for and what everyone seems to think of me but that doesn't give any of you the right to make me feel bad just over something I CAN'T FUCKING HELP!" he shouted once more.

He closed his eyes as if he was blinded by his anger which at the same time freed the tears, his hands and body were now shaking. Gavin wished for nothing more than to reach out and dry his tears, his face contorted in distress as he had to watch the seemingly always put-together android fall apart.

"EVERYONE acts like this I'm fucking monster and It's not fair, it's NOT!" His silent tears were now starting to turn into violent sobs, he couldn't stop shaking and somehow it felt like his thirium pump had grown in size and it was threatening to burst out of his ribcage.

Logically he knew that he couldn't experience pain but he did and it was making him panic. He leaned slightly forward, gripping his chest and squeezing his eyes shut as hard as possible, desperately trying to shut down all the angry alerts displayed in his HUD.

"I know that everyone looks at me and sees him and they ask themselves why the hell I'm not as gentle and kind as him. Do you know how it feels reed? DO YOU?! To know that all people can see it's the stupid reminder that the version of their friend that didn't like it's there while THE OTHER HAS DIED!" his yelling was more of a strained cry and to get it all out he had to shake his head slightly. His sobs were so violent that he had to lean forward to curl on himself as possible, just to feel some pressure over his chest so it would make the weird sensation of being seconds away from a heart attack go away.

Panic flooded through Gavin's veins and he felt his heart drop to the darkest pit of his stomach

"shit shit! Nines hey! I'm sorry, okay?! But you need to calm down I was just-" The detective tried to reach for the android's hands that were clawing at his chest but Nines flinched away, like a wild hurt animal trying to protect himself

"D-don't." Nines sneered at him, giving him a look more akin to panic than to anger. His lips quivered slightly as fury washed over him once again.

"you…you're always saying the most horrible things, you're always making me feel like nothing more than a heartless piece of plastic." The android voice was barely a whisper now. He seemed to hesitate for a moment, almost trying to swallow back his words just to fail miserably.

"I don't have anyone Gavin, anyone left…

except you.." another sob racked his body before he breathed out a humourless laugh "and..and you don't even like me!!..." he dug the heels of his palms into his eyes, his face scrunching in pain and with the struggle of trying to stop crying.

"Connor is gone and Hank too and I don't have anything left and…" he paused, taking a useless deep breath, running his hands through his hair desperately. Never once opening his eyes.

" I didn't want her to die," he explained with a strained voice. His face twitched as he tried to hold back the tears.

"She reminded me of him and I couldn't take it and I didn't want to touch her 'cause I didn't want to feel her die. I didn't want to-...i-" he tilted his head to the other side, hiding it with his arms so Gavin couldn't see his face, even if now was too late for that.

"I didn't want to feel what Connor felt when he…" he clenched his jaw so hard that a warning of facial damage popped into his hud. He felt empty and so tired which he had never thought possible but he did. He just felt like with every word a piece of him dissolved away with them.

He felt like if he finished that sentence then he would never be able to pull himself back together, that he would just break into pieces and it would never be okay again.

It seemed like some sort of understanding settled between the two of them at the mention of Connor's name since Gavin didn't try to mutter a single word about what Nines had left unsaid. During the android's rant he just listened, truly listened, and watched his friend crumble under the weight of his own sorrow.

He could feel his own eyes getting wet as Nines kept talking, holding his breath hoping it would make his heart slow down and hurt less. He forcefully pulled himself together before Nines could see him.

The android turned his head to look at the detective, lowering his arms to fully face him. He could only imagine what he looked like right now. His hair was a mess, his face coloured with the blue android version of a blush, a shade lighter of thirium staining every corner of his cheeks and eyes.

"I know you're not a bad person Nines…" Gavin mentally applauded himself for being able to keep a steady voice without breaking eye contact with his partner. He fidgeted frantically with a loose thread of his jacket, swallowing hard as he racked his brain to find the right words, "I know you miss him, and that you feel alone. I can see that all this emotions stuff is fucking hard for you" he allowed himself to tear his eyes away from Nines for the sake of not losing the small amount of courage he has managed to gather, "The thing is…that feelings suck ass for everyone and no one knows how to make it better" his breath hitched slightly and his eyes flickered towards the android before glancing back at his hands.

Nines gaze seemed empty and for a moment it could've looked like he wasn't listening at all, but he was. He didn't move an inch while the detective talked, letting his voice drown out his own thoughts and focusing on what he was saying instead of what was going on inside of him.

"What I'm trying to say tincan is that…" his lips twitched slightly as he tried to put together his poor attempt at comforting his disheartened android, "Nines, nothing bad, and i mean nothing, is going to happen if you admit you're not feeling great. Or that you're feeling something in general" this time his own grey eyes holded the android's blue gaze without hesitation.

Gavin's face and voice held nothing but genuine understanding and Nines seemed to flourish under it. It spread through his whole body as some sort of warm and calming wave making his led go back gradually to a serene blue, the tension on his synthetic muscles finally rolling off. The effects of Gavin's words were in equal parts scary and exhilarating in how they made Nines feel.

The realisation of how well Gavin could read him came so suddenly it almost left the android feeling dizzy. It sounded a lot like a corny movie cliché but everything seemed to finally come together in his puzzle of very confusing and frustrating interactions with the detective that always left him feeling as if Reed's animosity was with the purpose of just making his life miserable. How wrong he had been and how much his own distress clouded his judgement to think that all of this was just part of some childish rivalry between them.

Nines shouldn't have found it as surprising as he did that Gavin's help came in the form of aggression.

The detective didn't need a reply from the android to know that somehow the message had gone through. He nodded slightly more to himself than to Nines and allowed the humming from his car engine to fill the silence that had somehow become comfortable and free of the previous tension. A pair of blue eyes glanced from time to time at him with an almost shy gaze in them, making his features softened everytime a little more.

Despite the arguments and the fights or how much they would end up offending each other, Gavin wasn't just all he had but all he needed, whether he wanted to admit it or not. One day, he promised to himself, he would tell Gavin how much this meant to him.

[kanohivolitakk]

Rambling about Bionicles incoherent worldbuilding in terms of rigid morality

So, I was rewatching Legend Reborn the other day when I remembered an issue that bothers me about Bionicles writing so so much which I have wanted to talk about here at some point.

And that’s just how not only the series functions on a "your moral alignment is decided for you upon your creation and cannot be changed because the nature of a being is unchangeable and because destiny" logic, but how that logic clashes with the series central premise on "the world is inside a giant robot and every single character was created to aid said giant robot."

First things first, a lot of my detestment of this decision comes from personal preference. In fiction I tend to dislike rigid moral boxes and black-and-white-morality where the good guys are 100% good and bad guys are 100% bad with little to no nuance in-between. Sure it can work for some stories based on the plot, tone and themes, but in general I think that kind of storytelling is really limiting and boring. It puts things into clear cut boxes when real life is not so simple most of the time. I find morally complicated characters and even things like flawed heroes or villains with a few redeeming qualities more interesting interesting than a simple good vs evil story. These types of characters give the story more flavor and intrigue by showing that things aren’t black-and-white and that more complex shades exist.

But even my personal preference in storytelling aside, I think that completely black-and-white morality where a characters alingment was chosen upon their creation doesn’t just work with Bionicles setting and the Big Twist. Because like. This is supposed to be a world inside a giant robot. Every single character we meet during the first couple of years exists to fulfill their purpose and to help the giant robot to fulfill it’s task. In addition, most (if not all) of the characters originally had next to no sapience til one of their creators who was secretly inside the giant robot decided to make them sentient because why he was getting bored being one of the 5 sapient beings on this robot spaceship.

So if this is the case that MU inhabitants were created to aid Mata Nui, then why are some beings in this world created evil?? What kind of benefit would creating malicious beings bring? If every character is in one way or another supposed to help the GSR to fulfill it’s mission, then why on earth would you creating something that could easily sabotage and backstab you?

To be fair, there are traits we usually associate with evilness that aren’t inherently evil by themselves, like ambitiousness or being selfish for instance. These traits can be useful in certain situations. It’s very possible that Great Beings didn’t design MU inhabitants to be evil, but rather gave them those traits as a way to aid them in whatever purpose they were created for. These traits just ended up corrupting them because that easily happens. And honestly I really like that explanation. It explains why a lot of MU inhabitants are evil without going “they were designed to be evil”. And just feels very nice and satisfying. But at the same time...idk if giving like most living beings those traits make any sense if you know what I mean.

There’s also the argument that the reason the world is like this is because the Great Beings are these mad scientists who like making things dramatic because they are too confident in their abilites and because they can. But honestly that feels like lazy writing for me. Handwaving the implications by going “yeah the Great Beings did so because why the fuck not” makes the Great Beings seem far more incompetent than they probably were meant to be.

Idk I just...like Bionicle but sometimes I wish it’s view on morality was a bit more flexible than “toa good everyone else evil”. But that’s just me

[bleachbleachbleach]

3/12-3/19/2023

I gave this up a month ago, because the amount of time and active effort I need to put into MY DUMB JOB in order to still not get everything done rn is “all of it,” and the only thing attempting to write my single pumpkinposted sentence every day was accomplishing was making me more stressed and more upset, and I felt like I was on the verge of literal collapse, physically and mentally, so I was like, “well, fuck me and fuck having a hobby, then” and cut it. I do find extinguishing vain hopes helpful (at least until I take the time to remember to be upset about it), so that’s been relatively helpful. Sad little work robot me hasn’t completely kernel panicked yet, in any case. 

This week was supposed to be less garbage (and is not), but I did give up after 6pm this Tuesday and wrote, and added the missing pieces of Hinamori and Shinji’s scene, and finished the first half of Hinamori and Hitsugaya. There’s a beat in the Hinamori Shinji scene that I thought was out of place, but turned out to weave in thematically really well, and links up to part of HitsuHina2 explicitly, which I am very pleased about.

There’s four more segments to this chapter, all of which kind of exist currently and kind of don’t; three of which should be relatively short (Hinamori and introspection, Hinamori and Matsumoto, Hinamori and Nagakiso Shuutetsu) and one of which is long (Hinamori and Hitsugaya, part 2). 

I just really wish that I could reflect on my dumb blog how much I love my blorbos and the way they float around with me daily even if I don’t have space to think about them. I keep the chapter doc open on my personal laptop and whenever I open this laptop it’s the first thing I see and it fills me with joy! It feels very unfortunate to me that trying to access it more often does not play out as accessing joy and instead results in accessing the feeling of not getting to have this. 

“Write in little bits” they say; “MAKE the time,” they say. SURE except that’s the layer of existence I’m currently using to get a set of prodigal work projects done, and like, my taxes. Shoveling snow. Vacuuming! Anyway, that’s grim, but I think there might be something there for me sometime in the last two weeks of April, so I will set my sights there. I’ll be on vacation for two weeks in May, and come June my hope is to work normal hours and not a moment more, which will be a welcome change.

[dailyaudiobiblechronological]

12/27/2022 DAB Chronological Transcription

2 John 1, 3 John 1

Welcome to the Daily Audio Bible Chronological, I'm China. Today is the 27th day of December, welcome. It is so great to be here with you today. We're inching closer and closer and closer to the end of this year. And I hope that it's been a great year for you, as you've had a few moments to reflect or have had lots of moments to reflect and just ponder, wondered all what the Lord has done in your life, and how the Bible has really affected your life this past year and what the Lord has really shown you and highlighted and done for you. And I pray that you are really meditating on that and really feasting on that and setting your eyes on above, and that we end this season in this year well and we go into the next one with good hearts and ready to receive what the Lord has for us. So today we are in the book of second John, chapters one, and then we are also in third John, chapter one, and we continue on with the New International Version for this week.

Commentary

Something that I've consistently noticed again and again is that the greetings from these men who are writing these letters, whether it be John or Simon, Peter or Paul, the greetings that they give are so genuine. They're so genuine and they're so beautiful. I love that it's always grace, mercy and peace and maybe sometimes more than likely, there's also love thrown in there too and just saying, may that be with you, that's a big deal. You know, we wouldn't say, hey, I hope hatred and, you know, malice and let's throw in a little bit of jealousy. I hope those are all doing well with you. Like, I just wish them on you. That would feel like a big deal, right, if someone said that. But someone's bringing grace, peace and mercy and joy and love may that be with you. I feel like that's so beautiful. It encourages me to extend that more. And of course it may sound weird, but also that's okay. I think it could become a thing if you're not already, maybe you're someone who's like, I've been doing that my whole life, great. That's amazing. The other day, Ben and I were at church and someone came up to us and asked like, hey, how are you guys? Everything well, everything doing great. And I was like, okay, I'm not going to pause because I don't know what I want to say, but because I actually want to think about it and not just give you a generic response. And I was like, yes, actually, things have been great. Like, hasn't been a really crazy Christmas season. Like, it honestly has been very enjoyable and just getting to really enjoy it as parents. We enjoyed it as parents last year, but we're just trying to figure it all out. And Reagan was so still so tiny and now this year there's just a lot more of like, establishing and it's just been really enjoyable and I just felt like because I wasn't giving a robotic answer and I thought about it, I was able to be genuine. And so I just love that these letters just come from a genuine place. And I feel like when you're saying, let there be grace, let there be mercy and let there be peace, from God the Father and from Christ Jesus the Father's Son, be with you in truth and in love, I feel like you're going to be pretty receptive to anything that they're going to say after that. I would because John is talking about, listen, we need to talk. I want you to learn what love is. And now I want you to walk in love, walk in obedience and know that that is love and that God is love. And I just have been really enjoying John's letters and the sweetness and the tone that he has that is just like, understand who God is, understanding who Jesus is, and understand that the commandments that we have are valid and we should take them seriously and they are to love. And so I love that. May we walk in that today and forevermore.

Prayer

And so Jesus, I thank you for these men and their ways that they wrote and the ways that they thought and the ways that they heard from you. And God, I just pray that we would be people who choose to trust in you and the fact that you used them and that you spoke through them. And I pray that we would learn to love and that we would learn to receive love and to give it. God, may we enter into spaces and bring your peace, your joy, your mercy and grace and love. And may we also deposit it, may we be committed to bringing that about not just in the holiday season, but also just in the mundane as we're going and coming as we are in conversations and just in our own thoughts and communicating with others. And pray, Lord, that you would be glorified and magnified in it all. And it's in your name we pray, amen.

Announcements

Dailyaudiobible.com is our website that is a place of connection. Be sure to check that out. And if you have prayer requests and things that we as a community can come along the side of you and encourage you and pray over you, it's so necessary and it's so needed. So if you are needing that, then let us come alongside of you, and to do that. So you can call in at 800-583-2164. And if you listen through the app, you can also do that as well. But that is all for today. I'm China, I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

Community Prayer Line

Hello, everyone at Daily Audio Bible Chronological. My name is Heather and I'm from Regional Victoria in Australia. I just wanted to send in a message to thank firstly, China and Jill for your ministry through this program. At the end of last year, I was inspired by a friend who had finished reading the Bible chronologically and I loved the idea of doing it, but couldn't see myself managing to sit down and be still enough to read every day. But I discovered your audio program and thought that that would work perfectly with my morning walks and who would have thought that I would jump out of bed every morning at six excited to be walking and in the word of God. And it's just been such an amazing part of my year. I've learned so much, I've had questions answered and more questions created and I can't wait to repeat it all again next year with you all. I love the thought that as I am listening here in Australia and praying through the prayer requests as they happen because I'm in that different time zone that people in other parts of the world at other times would be praying those same requests and that there would just be this endless flow of prayer and time spent together that just happens continually all day. So I just thank you very much for this program, for everyone who contributes in so many ways and I pray that you will all have a very merry and a very blessed Christmas from Australia. Love to you all bye.

This is under construction and I just heard back from the apartment complex and we're approved. My husband and I are going to have our own home for the very first time ever since the day we met and God is just so amazing. Literally, you guys, we have to be out of the house by the end of this month. The move in isn't until January, so we got it extended. But like I could not tell you how many times the devil just attacked the whole situation and just made it seem so hopeless what if and I just kept on holding on like, no God, you are bringing this all together, you're going to make this all happen. You are the one moving us forward into this and just really tried to dig into the word of God and his promises. It has been really hard fighting the devil and just all of his just crap, but I just want to tell everybody that just hang in there because when things just feel so bleak and hopeless and scary, they're not always and just thank you everyone for all of your prayers. Thank God is truly just phenomenal because there is no way this could happen without him. Blessings, everyone.

Christmas greetings, my Daily Audio Bible, wonderful Chronological family. All right, this is Chicago peg and calling in to pray for Adrian from Maryland, god's mighty tortus. It really touched my heart when I heard your request and okay, that Maxi need you and Megan, Jared need you. Adrian, I'm lifting my prayer together even with all the DABbers for your travel back and forth to Baltimore and back to Boston, and probably will have traveled by the time you hear this. And yet, in God's perfect, omnipotent timing, I'm lifting my prayer for safe travels and for God's shalom peace to be with you, that you don't be anxious, Adrian, and that God will give you a calm heart, and everything in his purpose will be accomplished through you. And this is my prayer and my belief, and we trust in Him and just come together praising God and lifting you up, Adrian, and your family. Be safe and be blessed. And I just love you very much. And to all the DABbers and to the Harden family, I want to say I'm really enjoying my first year of the DAB Christmas party. This is my first time partaking in that, and now I'm listening to it each day. I just keep playing it over, through and through, just different parts of the day, and it really blessed me so much. So praise God, for the Harden family. All right, chicago signing off. God bless each of you. Amen.

[overx]

Cale

If you were reborn as someone/something new, who or what would you want to be?

If you could meet someone who has died, who would it be?

How did you die?

What’s the last thing you remember before death?

Is the afterlife/undeath exactly as you pictured it to be?

Do you wish you were alive and mortal again?

Was Death frightening to you?

What have you learned since your death?

When you meet living people, are they afraid of you?

If you could be brought back to life, would you accept?

Ask My Muse About Death | Accepting!

If you were reborn as someone/something new, who or what would you want to be?

"I don't really want t' be someone new." Cale doesn't mean to sound irritated but it just comes out that way. This fun hypothetical feels a lot less fun to the already deceased. "I wish I had more time as me."

If you could meet someone who has died, who would it be?

"...a lot of people. Poets. Authors. Artists. Musicians. There's so much of our past that was buried t' make room for today." Cale sounds wistful, but bitter.

"Why were those books burned? Movies banned? Art destroyed?" Rhetorical when he already knows the answer. Knows that suppression comes before preservation. "There are love stories I'll never know. Architects whose names are gone. Myths. Recipes. Languages..." he notices only now that his fist is clenched, and relaxes the intangible tension. "...how can ya pick just one person, when every life has so much value, so much to teach? The mistake is believin' only some people have a story t' tell."

How did you die?

"...I... wasn't careful enough." He shifts, grasping at the incorporeal fabric of his hoodie. "Sometimes, ya trust the wrong people with the right information. I knew there would be a reward for my head eventually, just... thought I wasn't worth enough yet."

What’s the last thing you remember before death?

Morbid. Should have expected that in hindsight. "...gets fuzzy," he admits, though he might very well be tiptoeing around the subject. "The thing 'bout it is... not all your systems fail at once. Depends on where the damage is, y'know?" Maybe in that way, he's fairly human after all.

"Pretty sure some of my internals that write memories in the first place took a beatin' before I was actually 'dead' so... I sorta remember gettin' jumped but... if you're hopin' for some messed up play by play, you're outta luck."

Do you wish you were alive and mortal again?

"Every day." A pause, a frown. "The work ain't done yet. Had a lot of ambitions." I wanted to save the world. Reduced to nothing but a spectator. "Lots of things I left unsaid t' a lot of people." How many of them were left in the dark?

...how many of them still thought of him at all?

Was Death frightening to you?

"...no," it's said with a slow thoughtfulness. "...I found him... familiar. Comfortable, in a way. I prob'ly shouldn't have," an awkward laugh. "...but he reminds me of someone I know. It's... almost nice t' see him around sometimes..." a fond smile. "...his partner, too."

What have you learned since your death?

"Oh, lots of things," the android gestures vaguely with his hand to himself. "I mean primarily the fact robots have souls I guess," he sounds a bit sarcastic, but not at all meanspirited. "Or that there's an afterlife at all. Plenty 'bout myself too, but you don't have all day for that."

When you meet living people, are they afraid of you?

"...depends on the person. I think seein' any spirit can bother those that ain't used t' it. I'm just lucky 'm not the most gruesome lookin' guy floatin' around." He shrugs, for the most part unbothered. "Still get weird looks sometimes."

If you could be brought back to life, would you accept?

"....yes, but I'd... like a little warnin', first. Just cause I'm dead doesn't mean I've got nothin' goin' on. It's called the afterlife, y'know." A grin from the spirit. "There's at least one person I'd like some time with before that happens. He knows who he is."

[declanfs]

November 9, 2023

I’m trying to write this while you are awake and playing in the playroom because there are only so many hours in a day that you are asleep and I can’t save everything for nap time or the short time before I join you to go to sleep myself.

Last night before bedtime you said you needed to go pee in the potty so I told you I would go get the little potty and bring it back. You insisted that you come too and help me so you walked down the stairs and then I had to carry you and the potty back up the stairs. This was maybe 7:05, and I was hoping you’d be asleep by 7:10 because of daylight savings ending, but it is what it is. Anyway, we got back upstairs and I asked if you wanted to use it, but you say no. “I just want it riiiight there, in case I need it,” you said.

So then we went back in the bedroom and it took you maybe 20-30 more minutes to fall asleep. I went downstairs to do my own bedtime things and you woke up at maybe 8:45 and dada and I heard you come out of your bedroom. You were not upset, but dada went upstairs to check on you because this is very unusual and if you ever leave your room its because you are looking for one of us. I heard him talking to you but couldn’t tell what you were saying. I finished getting ready for bed and then went upstairs so I could go to sleep too, and met dada as he was leaving your room. He closed the door behind him so he could tell me something.

He told me that he came upstairs to you trying to push down your pj bottoms and pull up to sit on your little potty. You were still half asleep so he helped you. Especially because you have NEVER done this before, not even during day time. You sat on the potty, peed, and then let dada help you pull up your pull up and pj pants and then you just walked right back into your room to lay down. Dada waited with you until you fell back asleep and then he left so he could share this story with me.

I was just shocked! This proves you are physically ready and capable of potty training, but you just don’t want to and/or are too stubborn. Which tracks, because you’re a Taurus and I’m a Taurus.

Other funny things before bedtime last night were that you randomly burst into song all the time now. You like all the nursery rhymes and try to sing them, but you don’t always know all the words. Last night you were singing baa baa black sheep, but you said “One for the boy, one for the girl, one for the lane” and then on the second round you said “one for Kreacher one for Bella one for mama one for dada.” There are just so many funny things you say and I wish I could remember or record them all, but I do know that you are such a delight to spend time with. You are so funny and smart and a good thinker and a little trickster.

It’s fun to ride in the car with you because you look at the window and comment on all the things you see and sing songs and its just like literally 1000 times better than riding in the car with you when you were a newborn or infant. Everyone is so vocal about how awful and terrible 2 year olds are, but you are seriously the best and so much fun. You have your moments of wanting your way and wanting to be in charge and make decisions, but I can take a deep breath and thinking of a playful way to say or ask you to do something, it works pretty easily like 90% of the time. It can be frustrating because sometimes I just want you to do something really quick or I want to do something really quick, but it actually saves time to pause and think of a playful thing than to try to power struggle through.

The current go to tactics are to talk in a robot voice. “Declan robot, come bite your eggs” and you’ll say “mama robot beep boop beep” or something like that.

The other one that works for most things is to pretend you are a baby animal: a mouse, moose, bear, bunny, whatever. Sometimes you’ll make the noise or hop like a bunny, but you’ll almost do whatever I’m asking. Putting on shoes, picking up a toy, taking a bite of dinner, getting ready for bedtime. It feels like magic. When it doesn’t work, then we have to compromise. Like playing with you for a few minutes and saying in a few minutes we will ___ and be all done playing. And then you’ll say okay.