#sometimes i use mobility aids on days when i don't require them

[honeysbunchesofoats]

when I walk somewhere without one of my usual mobility aids and someone I know (even vaguely) who knows I have a chronic illness says "oh is this a good sign?! are you improving?!?!!!" please please please shut up. I'm fighting so hard against the urge to strangle you. i WISH I had my cane so I could smack you with it. I'm having an okay pain day and now I regret not bringing my mobility aids just so you'd not say the most insensitive thing you could think of. I'm NOT improving. I CAN'T improve. I'm chronically ill and it hurts when you get excited that I can walk "normally." I get it to some extent, you don't want me to be in pain, because, you see, I *also* don't want me to be in pain. but I'm never recovering. I'll never be healed. I will be in pain for the rest of my life. I don't need you making it worse with your ignorant comments.

*abled people can fuck right off this post. do not try to explain. do not defend yourself. do not derail.*

[lesbxdyke]

Decided to steal my own tags from This Post because I didn't want to detract from the very good points being made about wheelchair accessibility in the art

So I'm disabled. And I often have to use crutches as a mobility aid. Sometimes one, sometimes two. And even with that, I still sometimes can't get around.

There have been numerable occasions in my life where something has been marked as 'accessible' that is not accessible to me, because it was made with ONLY wheelchair users in mind.

And like I said in my tags, it's a genuinely great thing that things are now being made with wheelchair users in mind! I am genuinely heartened and happy that wheelchairs users are being recognised in public spaces and accommodated for!

But they are not the be all and end all of physically disabled people.

I need the extra space of a disabled bathroom. Especially as another physical disability of mine causes me to often require space to change underwear or clothing.

However, if I'm having a bad pain day, I can't wash my hands. Because the only sink is at the height for a wheelchair user. So my options are to eschew hygiene and pray that a cleaner wipes down the door handle regularly so others aren't interacting with a thing that I have touched without washing my hands, OR risk furthering my own pain by bending to reach the sink, which could end in me stuck in the bathroom as my back seizes and I cannot move.

As I'm sure you can imagine from reading that, neither option is a good option, but one is a safer one for me. And I hate it. I'm 'lucky' in that I have to always carry baby wipes with me anyway so I'm somewhat able to mitigate the hygiene issue, but what if I didn't? What if I didn't have the extra disability and just had the back problems that required the extra space of the disabled bathroom for my mobility aids? What then?

I also have a radar key (for those not in the UK: disabled bathrooms are often locked. A radar key is a skeleton key for disabled bathrooms all around the UK) so I can always gain access to the disabled bathrooms. Except... I often have to find staff to help me open them anyway because the door handles are low and I can't bend to press them.

Now this post isn't me saying that the world should be built only to cater to me in particular (tho gods it would be nice!)

This post is talking about competing support needs and how my experience as a disabled person, struggling with how so much 'accessible' stuff is only designed for wheelchair users is just as valid as a wheelchair user celebrating that they can use an ATM and a public bathroom without needing the aid of a stranger or a carer.

I've seen quite a lot of people, in real life and elsewhere on the internet, want to call it Ableist when people ask for there to be a different option that would be inaccessible for a wheelchair user to use within an accessible area like a bathroom. They think it's able bodied people, or parents (since often in the UK, disabled bathrooms also double as baby changing, which is a whole different kettle of fish) demanding we take away the accessibility that the bathrooms are there for. They don't think about people on crutches, or canes, or with mobility that changes by day, or who can walk unaided but cannot bend, or, or, or.

Two sinks in a disabled bathroom would change my life. One wheelchair accessible, one not. I could wash my hands. Other people who needed the bathroom could wash their hands. Everyone could be hygienic in an accessible way!

Two ATMs, side by side. One lower, one higher. I can access my money. Wheelchair users can access their money. Everyone can withdraw their money safely in an accessible way!

Maybe there's no solution for some (like the door handle) but if others were solved, then the remaining ones would bother me a lot less. It's a lot less frustration and humiliation inducing to say "Hey, can you open the bathroom for me?" When you know you'll be able to wash your damn hands once inside, yknow?

[insipid-drivel]

Honestly I wish abled people took more advantage of accessibility and mobility assisting stuff.

Not just because we need more attention paid toward the world of mobility aids and accessibility in general (we do, but still), but also because a lot of able-bodied people unconsciously put themselves through more discomfort and suppress more pain than they may actually realize they're feeling and wind up going undiagnosed too long.

Like, we live in a world where getting exercise and spending good quality time in Third Spaces and other forms of staying active, socially engaged, and healthy just isn't an easy thing anymore, and most jobs force us into painful and ultimately chronically-painful positions like sitting and typing for most of the day. I just have a hard time believing that there aren't that many silent endurers of chronic pain that, due to being able to still move and carry on without assistance, most people push to the back of their mind and endure in silence.

A shower chair makes a world of difference just for regular bathing. You're resting your legs, able to recline a bit, still clean yourself as well as any other bath or shower, but still give your body more time to unwind and relax. The heat from the kinds of baths and showers most of us like is really good for most overworked and sore muscles, so having the opportunity to rest while bathing and spending a while under genuinely-therapeutic water therapy could actually be a great help to people that don't even know they'd benefit from it.

Walkers and canes that double as seats are great for if you're on your feet for long hours, especially outdoors in hot weather. Even if you're just going to Pride or hanging out at a con of some kind, a walker can be a great way to take more frequent breaks to let any tension from standing and walking for long hours unwind, and reduce the amount of strain in general you're putting on your body, so you can enjoy your time at con longer. A lot of lower back spasms and aches are actually the product of overworked thighs, hamstrings, and even irritated sciatic nerves.

No-rinse sponge bath cloths used by nurses in hospitals, hospice, and palliative specialties are great ways to keep yourself clean if you deal with executive dysfunction and realize you forgot to shower or put on deodorant and can smell yourself. They're as discreet as keeping a pack of wet wipes in a bag or purse, and are designed to require no water to rinse with after using them to still clean your skin. They work great even just as face cleaning wipes you can keep on your night stand for if you forget to wash your face and don't want to get out of bed.

Sometimes a wheelchair is actually psychologically comforting and can allow you to relax enough to go into spaces that usually make you uncomfortable (especially in ERs; I've seen A LOT of people in a lot of pain or general misery that would have a better time in a wheelchair than if they kept making themselves walk, and all you have to do is ask for a wheelchair in an ER to get one in most places), even if you're completely ambulatory. If you deal with feeling anxiety in particular spaces or become overwhelmed easily by too much stimulation, wheelchairs can allow a friend or loved one to take over the walking part for you, and a wheelchair itself forms a literal metal-framed square of Personal Space Just For You. In a wheelchair, you can cover yourself with a blanket, and they even make weighted lap-blankets for wheelchair users to provide comfort for anxious users and help them sleep when they want to nap. Nobody expects you to make eye-contact in a wheelchair, either, and so people who deal with severe issues with feeling forced to make eye-contact with strangers as they're trying to pass by have the excuse of "I need to see where I'm wheeling to" to keep their eyes down.

This isn't to say that physically abled people need to use these things in order to be allies; just that they're objects considered restricted to disabled people only, and so demand for them remains low, advances in their technology is slower in coming, and there are a lot of people in the world that walk around just fine and don't fully realize that the reason they have insomnia or struggle to focus sometimes is that they're suppressing pain they've been dealing with that certain mobility aids can reveal by relieving.

[totalspiffage]

ok regarding your tags on that post on accommodations: is it ok to use a cane if none of your disabilities are supposed to impact your mobility? i'm just supposed to have digestive issues and fatigue, but when i go to walmart i test out canes and i found that some of the taller height ones help me feel less tired when i'm walking, but i'm scared to use them, because i'm mostly just neurodivergent (so i have balance issues from meds side effects, but i'm mostly able. bodied) and i have lymphocitic colitis, which is just supposed to affect digestion? so is it ok to use a cane if you don't have EDS or arthritis?

First off yes!!!!!!

There are many reasons you could choose to use a cane. None of those reasons require you to justify using it. If using a mobility aid helps you in any way, please seek it out.

Also! I want to point out you're really minimizing your issues. Digestive issues can impact the way you process food and energy which can in turn throw your body completely off! I'm betting there's a lot of pain that doesn't go away or that comes in waves. That sticks with you. Don't discount those things.

I walk around my house most of the time without a cane. I sometimes leave the house without it if I'm feeling up to it. But if I have to stand I regret not bringing it because it prevents future injury and pain. If I stand for too long without it, I'll be out for a whole day recovering and I know that.

I want this to be normal. I want you to not hurt. I want you to have the tools you need when you need them! Give yourself permission to try.

[swampgallows]

hello! ive been curious about going to a rave - some time in the nebulous future, as it's not something that's feasible for me rn + covid - but i do use a cane. do you have any thoughts about if that would impact a rave experience a lot? + if it's not too invasive, do you have any thoughts about raving while disabled/disability and the rave scene in general? thank you, and have a good day!!

this is long, but hopefully informative!

raving with mobility aids is definitely a thing!! one of the longtime DJs in the soCal scene, DJ Alexander, was the first cane user i thought of: he also throws events with Technostate in addition to playing at them. i also know some candy kids who are wheelchair and cane users, and i've seen occasional crutches and boot casts. i also know neurodiverse ravers who have sensory sensitivities, ravers with invisible illnesses that need accommodation, and ravers with mental illness such as myself. for any kind of disability i'd say it really depends on the venue. in my "going raving alone" post i mention gauging your own comfort level and preparing accordingly, and a lot of times that boils down to the location.

underground raves happen in cool but sometimes inaccessible areas. outdoor parties can happen in forests, open fields, mountains, beaches, deserts, and even on top of a dried up dam. indoor venues can be places intended for music events, like concert/banquet halls, elks lodges, galleries/studios, arenas, convention halls, and bars/clubs, but underground events can be in trickier places like airplane hangars, old warehouses/factories/stores (god i wish i had pics of the rave inside the abandoned mall), industrial district apartments, trainyards, or even under a freeway overpass.

i'm including my old posts partially as a trip down memory lane but also so you can see the variations in space, crowdedness, ventilation, lighting, etc. the following is a quick n dirty list of how things usually go, but are not necessarily guaranteed:

outdoor events -- pros: lots of space, (people won't trip over your cane or knock you over); open air ventilation; you can bring whatever you like (food, drinks, chairs, even a tent); the music is loud enough to hear from a good distance away, so you don't have to be crowded by the speakers; no rules for when you arrive or leave; earplugs always recommended but not required if far enough away. neutral: sometimes outdoor parties are multi-day events. plan beforehand for how long you will want to stay and what supplies you will need. cons: ground could be uneven; chance of wild animals/bugs; no bathrooms; VERY little lighting (sometimes none at all); subject to weather changes; anything you need you have to bring with you; car required.

indoor events -- pros: bar or access to drinks/water and snacks; atmospheric (but dependable) lighting; house sound; accessible via transit in the city; "repeat" venues lead to familiarity with the venue itself and the surrounding area so you know what to expect. neutral: there are bathrooms. sometimes they are indoors with running water, and sometimes they are port-o-potties. cons: stairs only; hundreds of people in a limited space can lead to crowding; "no ins-and-outs" = people tightly packed inside; amateur sound and/or lighting rigs might be overstimulating or painful; potentially very unsafe in general (e.g. abandoned warehouse); poor ventilation = smoky, humid, and hot; fog machines are the devil; NO seating/chairs; exposure to dirt, dust, mold, trash; spilled drinks + sweat + darkness + mobility aid = slipping hazard; EARPLUGS ALWAYS. to emphasize: indoor underground venues are dirty as hell. your toes and snot will be black with filth in the morning. [these cons are worst case scenario but i have experienced all of these things at one point or another. also sometimes there is violence and/or crime. it's rare, but it has happened.]

hybrid/corporate events (EDC, Ultra, and other arena-style events) -- pros: designated accessibility areas and amenities (elevators, escalators, etc.); medics on site; bathrooms with running water; access to food and water/drinks; seating; paved pathways; cleanup crews; professional sound; accepts both cards and cash; accessible via public transit and has ample parking. neutral: these tend to be multi-day events, sometimes with corresponding apps on your phone for a map, timeslots, digital ticket, etc. treat it more like a convention or music festival than a rave party. cons: THOUSANDS of people; extreme lighting rigs might be overstimulating; difficulty traversing the grounds due to sheer size of the event; a rave-adjacent experience but not necessarily the same vibe or community as an underground rave; corporate greed and poor management has infamously led to overcrowding and medical emergencies; expensive as hell (ticket, hotel, travel, etc.). (these are less disability-specific but I feel they're important to mention).

---

you can always scope the venue beforehand for accommodations, at least for public venues. underground events oftentimes will not release directions or an address until the night of the party to keep away undesirables. however, in my experience if you contact the crew (or even one of the local DJs) they'll be happy to give you the rundown (e.g. bathroom situation). also, i think most modern day events don't use map points anymore, so that eliminates a layer of complexity.

if you're not sure what your tolerance level might be, keep an eye out for day parties. these are usually at public parks or beaches, so there's plenty of parking, lots of space to spread out, and the sound isn't too amplified. they also rarely reach more than a few dozen people, as anything else requires a permit and risks being broken up by authorities. day parties are generally more chill and low-key, sometimes serving as an afterparty for a "real" rave the night before. this is a nice way to test the waters and to spend an afternoon meeting people, making kandi, or having a picnic, all while enjoying sets from local DJs.

there are also "raver day" meetups at places like amusement parks, zoos, aquariums, and other places that offer group discounts without strict dress codes. as part of "magic in the making" my buddy vince organizes biannual (summer and winter) raver days at disneyland, which i have loved and attended nearly every year (pre-pandemic) since 2004. we wear our favorite outfits, trade kandi made just for raver day, and meet new people. if you don't know anyone in the scene, doing a big group activity like a meetup is a great way to introduce yourself.

--

i do have many thoughts about disability and the rave scene, especially in this " "post"-covid era" (please imagine infinite quotation marks around "post"), but this answer is long enough already. all i can say is that some crews have done their due diligence in promoting the safest atmosphere possible, requiring proof of vax/negative covid tests (and actually checking them), masks while in indoor/crowded areas, and installing upgraded HEPA filter ventilation systems in their venue—but that was about a year ago. now, as we approach the end of 2022, many raves and their crews are not concerned with whether or not their events are accessible. in my opinion, that is a major detriment to the scene's unity, and it effectively prohibits me from attending any events for the foreseeable future. i miss raving more than anything, but i am currently not willing to risk lifelong disability or death to return to it prematurely, or to return to a scene that i, frankly, no longer recognize as the community that once loved me so much in return.

on a positive parting note, here is the late rave legend Keith Flint of the Prodigy greeting and embracing some disabled fans (0:45, warning for flashing lights from 0:00 - 0:50). He was the realest dude there ever was:

i can't wait for you to make your foray into the scene once it is safe for us both :)

[autisticlee]

I wasn't diagnosed with hEDS, despite very much suspecting it before that. my doctor used that testing method (I always forget the name of) that looks at like 5 joints only and judges based on that. some of those happened to be joints I don't have as much issue with (for example, my elbows and knees don't bend past the degree required and my back is way too stiff to touch the ground without a lot of stretching first) but I was told I have general, basically harmless joint hypermobility and there's no treatment to help me or anything. I'm basically fine I guess?

I was told by a few people on twitter that the test is outdated and the issues I mention having sounds a lot like hEDS and I need a second opnion (but can't get one because that's the only doctor in my hospital/insurance system) so all I have to go by is what people online have told me from a guess and what a doctor told me. so I really don't know what the truth it. but I feel obligated to go off of what the doctor said and say "I'm fine" because I was also told by twitter people that this "isnt something to wish for/it's a very serious condition/you can't just self diagnosed this/etc" so I can only assume I just have a few joints that bend more than they should but it's fine.

(this is longer than i expected so i'll cut it)

my joints are always popping and cracking and feeling very loose and floppy. I don't get big dislocations requiring hospital visits that I am told are a required symptoms of hEDS. )I can dislocated my jaw on demand though and have to use my hands to put it back lmao and other joints get stuck and feel like they're trying to dislocate and stuff like that? i've had toes and fingers dislocated and my parents just yank on them until they pop back in. my hips are some of the worst joints i think. of course those aren't tested in the EDS test. i'll be walking and suddenly my hip feels like it pops out of place or gets stuck. if i'm standing and shift my hips, I can feel it pop really dramatically. always a dull pain, sometimes sharp pain that makes it very hard to walk untol it goes away. but I try to ignore it.

I feel like I have high pain tolerance (not sure if due to being autistic and having weird sensory issues, or from basically being trained my while life to ignore my pain because my parents couldn't afford to take me to doctors, being told to suck it up i'm being dramatic, getting ignored or told others "have it worse," etc.) so i've just been accepting the joint pain I get, especially from my very physically demanding job, and don't do much about it. I'm pretty sure most, if not all my sleep problems are due to chronic pain and discomfort. everyone tries to tell me it's all in .y head and I can't sleep because my mind is "too active" and i'm just "thinking too much" so i've been suggested so many things to treat anxiety. thkae don't work and meds made it WAY worse. i'm the definition of "head empty" when i'm trying to sleep. I don't think that's it lmao. if it's anything in my head, it's the vivid dreams I have. but do dreams make you feel like you got physically hit by a truck? maybe mentally, yeah.

my mom, who I work with, has chronic pain and back and other problems. so since she "just deals with it" she applies that to me and says "mine is worse/I deal with it every day and it mever stops/I can't help you/you have nothing to complain about/etc" and not just her, my whole family seems to have chronic pain and stuff. it's like it's genetic, idk. so i'm expected to work through it and ignore it. she doesn't use any mobility aids despite probably needing to, so it was never suggested to me. i've had pain and issues most my life but was always told i'm "too young to have any pain. wait until you're 25/30/35" (the number changes as I get older for some reason...) "you arent allowed to complain/experience pain now, you're too young. exercise more. you sit at your computer too much. etc" so i've just tried to ignore it and deal with it because i'm overreacting and it's not bad, right? others have it worse.

I visited some friends this past week. One friend is disabled and uses a cane/wheelchair to aid her mobility due to severe chronic pain. I brought my hip brace with me, which helps hold my hip in the joint a little and helps stop it popping out as I walk (there's still pain though, but it stops my joint from popping out sideways when i move it, if that makes sense?) my friend noticed me struggling and despite me telling her i'm fine and this or normal, she demanded I don't just "deal with it" like everyone else. she made sure I had my brace on, shared her pain meds, and made me borrow her cane while she used her wheelchair.

we went to an anime convention and met up with one of my friend's friends for a little bit. she also uses a cane when walking around a lot. she noticed my hip issues and my skin having a bad reaction to the double sided tape I was using for cosplays and asked if I had EDS because I showed signs like people she knows who have it. that kind of further makes me wonder if maybe my doctor misdiagnosed because of the bad outdated test? perhaps it's not and i'm overthinking it. i'm just thinking that if that's what it it actually is, it would be nice to know so I know how to help myself? like maybe there's more treatments than just ignoring standard hypermobility? and what if there's other related issues i'd have to watch for amd not know about?

but anyway, borrowing my friends cane, with and even without my hip brace (sometimes with wrist brace too if i remembered because wrist pain particularly due to an old, severe injury as a kid), doing a ton of walking all week, I noticed I never got sharp hip and knee pains that I get normally that almost down me every day at work or when going for a walk. I always try to ignore them and push through and continue what I'm doing. I assume that's fine and even get annoyed at myself for being so overreacting to it????? i'm suppsed to have high pain tolerance, right? i'm making a big deal out of nothing probably!!!!

but using it that whole week and finding that it helped makes me wonder if I should get my own???? not that I really go anywhere and I can't use it at work because I have to use my hands the whole time. (or is that attention seeking behavior? I know using one draws negative attention because people are assholes about that stuff. but it's still attention. am I secretly wanting attention???) I also wonder if i'm experiencing more issues than I think. like have I gotten so used to ignoring things that it's actually worse than I think? am I a walking imposter syndrome? i've heard you can dull your own sense of pain by ignoring it long enough and being autistic with sensory issues can also cause a reduced sense of pain. it seemed like being around other disabled people and people who actually paid attention to me meant people noticed me struggling more than I notice, if that makes sense?? but I don't know i'd I am truly struggling or i'm unconsciously making it up????

when I was on my way home walking through the airport, I thought I was doing fine. yeah, I was going slower than everyone else and leaning on my rolling carryon luggage, but i'm sure I was fine......I must have looked like I was struggling. a man driving one of those little transport vehicles through the hall stopped and asked if I was ok. I said i'm fine and he insisted I get on and he take me down the rest of the very long hall. he got to the end where it splits and I needed the opposite way he was headed so he called for someone with a wheelchair to scoop me up and take me to my gate and wouldn't accept a no.

I thought i'd be fine shuffling the hour long layover I had to the opposite side of the airport to my gate, but turns out I made it a minute after boarding time started even with other people running me through on wheels double the speed or more i was going myself. I may have missed my flight if I kept shuffling on my own.....

even though it was a lot of help, I still felt bad, like I was taking up resources from people who really needed it. I never considered myself physically disabled despite my weird joint issues, weakness, chronic pain, lack of balance and coordination, etc. it was a lot of help, and like I said, I may have missed my plane without it, but I still felt really bad and still do, like a fraud, like I was wasting something others needed more. I just feel like my struggles aren't enough to warrant any thpe of disability aid, if they can even be considered struggles at all. I felt like i'm an able person being fake and taking something that doesn't belong to me, wasting resources that aren't meant for me, despite it not being me who chose it or asked for it. I tried to refuse, but it was given to me by someone who seems to have felt I needed it????? should I have rejected it more and tried to be more insistent on being fine? (though i'm not sure i'd be capable of that since I was overwhelmed and my autistic brain can barely handle airports....so talking at all was kind of out of the question)

i really feel like I don't need or deserve help like that! I need to deal with it on my own and ignore it, right? others have it worse! it's not that bad. I can deal with it on my own. maybe i'm being dramatic about any pain and stuff i'm experiencing and need to suck it up and stop complaining. It's not bad enough to even mention it! maybe i'm unconsciously trying to get attention or something like that. unconsciously looked like I was struggling for some kind of attention or something (despite trying to always shrink and hide myself in public to be left alone, especially when sensory overwhelmed). I hope I didn't impede anyone who needed and deserved help more than me 🥺😔

[thebibliosphere]

Hello! I hope that you are well* (*As well as can be, in spoonie terms). I'm writing to ask if you have any Spoonie Advice on how to keep going with house repairs when it seems like your house invents new ways to be inaccessible every week. I had to move recently, and meeting the rising tide of accessibility challenges in my new apartment is daunting and tiring. Any tips, tricks, or words of wisdom? (No pressure to answer though, if you don't have the spoons or wouldn't like to!)

Hello, thank you <3 I hope you're doing well too. (With the same caveat of course lol)

My advice would be to do what is immediately available to you to improve your life and help you preserve energy for the big things.

When we first moved into our house, I was suffering the worst of my fatigue. Yet foolishly, I did very little to make my life easier. I was stuck in the mentality of not wanting to spend money on temporary fixes that would make my life easier because we would eventually redo the entire space.

So why bother to invest in a shower chair so I can sit down and preserve energy while I wash? We were going to redo the tub soon. Why bother with mobility aids that suction to the wall and don't require drilling? We're going to be installing permanent ones at some point. Why waste $20 on an ugly piece of plastic that I eventually won't need?

I did the same in our apartment. Why bother to do XYZ to the space when it would never be our permanent home? I could manage, I could cope. I didn't need to make minor accommodations when we would eventually make major ones.

Was there some internalized ableism going on there? More than probably. Was I justifying denying myself aids that would improve my life because I was suffering under the idea of being more efficient and cost-effective in the long run? Absolutely.

So yeah, when everything seems overwhelming, look around your space and try to assess what can easily be helped with a quick trip to your local Walgreens or Home Depot, or a quick look at Amazon and browsing through the accessibility options.

Would a shower chair help you preserve energy in the shower? Great! They can also double as extra flat storage space at the side of the tub/shower when not in use.

Would temporary suction cups bars help your stability in the shower? Also great. And the good thing about temp ones is you can take them with you if you wind up going somewhere where you're not sure your accessibility needs will be met.

Would extra laundry baskets help you pre-sort your laundry, thus removing an extra step from the executive dysfunction chain come laundry day? Awesome.

Would removing cabinet doors help with executive dysfunction so you can see where everything is? Cool. Most are easy to unscrew and set aside for putting back on later if/when you move on from a rented space.

Same with labels? Would labeling things help you find stuff? You could buy a label maker, or you could get some crafting tape that peels off from (most) finishes easily and write them by hand.

Would something like the 15-minute pick-up help you keep on top of your cleaning routine and make it easier for you to tackle? Fab. I bought a bunch of cheap buckets and baskets from Ikea to keep things contained. Helps with my dust allergies and reduces tripping hazards in the house.

Can't reach the storage space in your house? We bought low-down sorting bins for me to use that don't require a lot of upward mobility. You can get some pretty stuff at Ikea too if you're able to build things or have someone who can help you with them.

If the counters in your kitchen are too high, are you able to place a table you can comfortably sit at for food prep, or can you bring a chair into the space you can use to boost yourself up the counter height?

What about your utensils? Would tools designed for mobility help save energy/reduce injury? (Some good examples when searching Amazon for 'knives for arthritis'.)

I don't know what your specific needs are, but if you would like to discuss examples with me, I can try to help troubleshoot them and lighten the mental load. That’s the benefit of having a diverse disabled community around you. We get to share our experiences and our life hacks. And they're usually more helpful than "install an entire pulley system of ropes and sliders across your basement staircase to do your laundry in the basement" when you're talking about waiting to install a washer and dryer on your main floor lol.

(I love all of you. It's just mentally taxing when people all keep suggesting the same thing repeatedly. Especially when that thing involves major structural work that isn't actually as simple as it sounds.)

Of course, these are all steps that require money, but that is sadly true of most accessibility steps. The world is not built with us in mind, so it always costs extra for us to function in it. But from experience? It's money well spent, even if you have to do it gradually and if the goal is to replace them with "better" things in the end. Tackling things in little steps helps. And honestly, sometimes you don’t realize how much the accumulative weight of minor problems is weighing on you until you pick them off one by one.

A kilo of feathers still weighs the same as a kilo of steel. Just because one is softer and not as hard looking doesn’t make it any lighter to carry.

[prof-peach]

Hello there.. My name is Ranny and I saw Pokemon matchups are open.

I read somewhere among your posts that Ghost types could be good for little exposure to the outside? I could be mistaken, but I'll leave it to the expert.

I feel I'm quite.. difficult.. to matchup with and I can't think of something myself, I don't want to hinder any Pokemon's growth with my circumstances.. which I should probably explain? I guess I don't need to go into too much detail but I have a lot of anxiety and depression, social anxieties and ptsd (very reactive to things moving too fast above me). I have fluctuating agoraphobia also, when at a severe level being too close to windows and doors will trigger panic attacks.. I have mobility issues down to Fibromyalgia, communication and management difficulties due to Autism, and I have a hard time concentrating or get lost in hyperfocussing down to ADHD..

I'm very introverted, an INFJ personality, but I do get lonely, very lonely. My depression pretty much has me feeling low more often than not but also pretty hopeless in finding a Pokemon friend, partner, companion, or anything that won't ultimately become hindered by my existence..

Any shred of hope I have of finding someone, even if just the right direction toward one, has been poured into this.. But ultimately, please don't feel too bad if you can't think of any or don't have any available.

I have seen many specialists for my mental and physical health too, it's a painfully slow process, I just thought some company might help the journey perhaps..

Fingers crossed, huh?

Many kind regards, Ranny

The right thing you did here was explain. I’m able to give you a far more accurate suggestion because of that, so thank you for being honest about what you need a Pokemon for, aside from good company.

You’re not wrong, finding a Pokemon must have been hard for you, no one individual Pokemon could cover all the bases. That being said, a group of three low impact species could indeed help you here.

Because your situation is so specific, there’s a little less wiggle room on what you could get away with keeping, but for sure you have some choices.

So first off, emotional help, shuppet. A Pokemon happy to be indoors, often willing to help those who show them love. They’ll help regulate the moods, keep you calmer, happier, and overall more freed up to handle other things. The feelings of anxiety and depression are exhausting, You know that, but without that constant background noise of it all, you’ll have a lot more energy and opportunity to enjoy more things. In serious cases, even two shuppet would help, so talk to your doctor and also the pokecentres near you about this. This of course can be done over the phone or online, if it suits you better. Shuppet are underrated, and have high populations in the wild, I don’t know why folks overlook them, perhaps the dex entries around the species spook them. Either way, can’t suggest better than them.

Second up, indoor happy psychic types. The psychic lines are adept at aiding day to day, if you hurt and can’t reach something, or you feel tired and can’t get up to deal with going to the bathroom or something, they’re more than capable of using telekinetic powers to assist your movements, even in the bad days. Some are fully able to learn how to help regulate moods too, predicting panic attacks for their trainers, using various methods to help you before things get too stressful, or even dangerous. They also regulate brain waves, so your autism may feel a little easier to manage the longer you spend with a psychic partner. It’s proven most psychic types will do this automatically, to aid their human family day to day.

My top psychic pokemon picks for you:

solosis - a Pokemon that can and does exist in the vacuum of space, they don’t require food like average Pokemon, and have a very upbeat outlook on things more often than not, thrive indoors, so long as they get enrichment and company.

Espurr - correctly trained these Pokemon can also double up as a really good buddy for those who feel calmer when petting or brushing fur. They can be great loving companions, but also are notoriously happy entertaining themselves should you be busy, and find the life of an indoor Pokemon quite agreeable sometimes.

If I was in your position, and I felt like I could afford and handle three, I would get all three Pokemon I suggested. This gives them days off, time to relax, and breaks from the duties of a support Pokemon. Everything needs time out, so having a care rotor will allow them to plan for time out, to do things they enjoy too.

You’ll have to take this list to your local adoption centre, or even lab/professor, and they will help to put you on a waiting list for the correct species you decide upon in the end. You can’t just go and catch one from the wild in this case, these Pokemon all need very intense and specific lessons to help them be the best aids to you. The facility that eventually helps you find a set of partners will then try to match your personality to those of the support Pokemon then have ready to be rehomed. Get ready for a few visits to the facilities, to meet potential matches, but it’s well worth it. The company and love Pokemon give us is proven to aid in mood, and wellbeing. I think it’d really do you well to take at least a shuppet on.

Be aware, when possible it’s still nice for these Pokemon to go outside, even if you don’t. If you have access to a yard, or a shared garden, try to let them have time in the sun when possible if they are interested. Socialising them is also advised, even if only with friends and family’s Pokemon, send them with trusted individuals to the shops, just to take a break from the house, you know, normal junk like that.

The facility that will eventually assign you a partner will make sure to pick individuals who suit your lifestyle as best as possible, so you shouldn’t end up with a partner who isn’t ok with the conditions you’ve set out.

Do not lose hope, there’s a combo out there for everyone, and I think this set is a good one for you from what you’ve told me. Hopefully you can move forward and make some neat friends!

[annakendck-blog]

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