#sometimes she reviews things that literally look fine on her and says they are not flattering for her skintone

[treesbian]

there's a makeup reviewer i come across ever so often that occasionally refers to her completely normal lip textured lips as "wrinkly butthole lips" and recommends products to "cover" or "combat" this and girl that is such a weird insecurity to have. your lips look like lips. it's okay. it's okay.

[trainsinanime]

I feel like talking a bit more about Vanisher 2.0 and Red Volpina (todo: look up what these Miraculous Ladybug season 5 episodes are actually called). My previous review of them has been,

Yes there is stuff where the writing still has potential to get better (not once but twice does everybody in class believe a known liar over Marinette!? Marinette’s classmates suddenly realized Chloé was doing badly in school and somehow that’s Marinette’s problem!? Lol), but it’s still better than it’s ever been.

But maybe there's more to talk about here. Just a couple of days ago I saw a post that complained bitterly about how unfair it is that Marinette must always prove herself, and how Alya was a bad friend in these two episodes.

I don't think that's a great hot take, but I think there is a kernel of truth here. The writing in these episodes was not 100%, but in ways that are interesting to talk about. This isn't meant as salt; I watched the episodes with my sister and I had a lot of fun with them regardless of their flaws. I just think it's interesting.

First of all, I don't think it's actually a problem that Marinette must prove herself. Marinette encountering obstacles and overcoming them through cleverness and strength of will is the point of the show. That's literally fine.

The real issue here is that all the characters are written rather weirdly in order to make the plot happen. Alya is the most visible victim of this, but everyone suffers from it to a certain degree.

In fact, in Vanisher 2.0 (todo look up episode title), this even applies to the villains. Sabrina does not want to steal for Chloé because it goes against her code of ethics as a police officer's daughter. Where did that come from? She has stolen from Marinette before, on Chloé's behalf, back in Darkblade in season 1. The show is just summoning conflict out of thin air.

(There is probably a joke to be made here, about how the cop's daughter steals and plants fake evidence on Marinette to accuse her of a crime, but that's a different thing.)

But it is most notable with Marinette. In Vanisher 2.0 (todo look up title), everybody sees stolen high-value goods such as… paper doilies…? appear out of Marinette's bag, after Chloé told everyone they'd be in there. And the conclusion everyone draws is that Chloé is correct.

Then in Red Volpina, the class learns that Chloé has never made her own homework, something the teacher apparently never noticed before. The class somehow agrees with Lila that this is Marinette's fault for not recognising that Chloé is struggling, despite this not being Marinette's job, and despite Chloé's insistence that she isn't struggling, she just doesn't care.

Neither of these are at all consistent with basically anything that came before. The class knows who Chloé is, how vindictive, petty and entitled she is. They also know who Marinette is, are friends with her, and a surprisingly high percentage are or have been in love with her.

From a story perspective, it makes sense, though. Both episodes want to tell a particular story. In Adoration (todo fix all the spots where I called it Vanisher 2.0), the point is to get to Zoé's big heroic self-sacrifice for Marinette. In Revelation, it's about how always seeing the best in people can sometimes lead you astray. Those are both interesting ideas in their own right. It's just that the episodes used narrative shortcuts to get us there, and ignored character consistency along the way.

I think the point about Alya is the most important one here. Saying "Alya is a bad friend" is canonically not true (look at all the stuff our poor girl puts up with on Marinette's behalf), but also missing the forest for the trees. As smarter people than me have put it, Alya is often only in the story to make Marinette's internal conflict an external one, so we can see the different sides argue in screen instead of imagining them in our head. As a result of that, Alya is sometimes her own character, and sometimes, very often in fact, just whatever she needs to be to get the plot moving.

In Revelation (todo fix yada yada), the plot they had in mind wouldn't work at all if Alya took Marinette and Adrien seriously, and acted on all the information she has. So she just doesn't. That doesn't mean she's a bad friend, it means she's a narrative tool, one that the writers don't always wield super well. Alya is far from the most irrational person in this episode (come on, Gabriel, giving Lila superpowers again? Even though you know she hates you? That's just silly), but since she's one of the good guys and Marinette's best friend and often portrayed as the voice of reason, we notice it the most in her case.

I think the show is genuinely nice and fun, but there's no denying that its writing has flaws. Sometimes more, sometimes less, and these two episodes have some that just stand out a bit. Framing that as "the show is unfair to Marinette" (or even "Alya is a bad friend") is not an interesting way to discuss that, in my opinion. The real issue is that the show had a story it wanted to tell, only twenty minutes to do so, and so it crammed that story in with a crowbar, regardless of the cost. Both episodes have enough good moments to make up for it in my personal opinion, but they have central moments that are just plain clunky.

[mgarmagedon]

Okay today I'm giving my honest opinion about Earth Spark season 2 part 1 :D and I still think it's shit :DDD

Before anything, there are gonna be spoilers, so please don't read it if you want to have opinion on your own or just have fun of watching :D

You may ask then, "why tf are you watching it then you stupid hoe", oh silly because I like make my opinion on something, and how could I shit about it if I didn't watch it???

And I will not repeat myself here about things I already complain about it, like graphics (but sometimes I had a feeling like I was watching cutscene from the fucking game on nintendo XDD), texture, this fucking stupid bitch hashtag, etc. but yk have it in mind

But to not being rude I will say something nice first! I like sometimes jokes, like I cringed while them much much more less than last season which is good thing, because few of them were somehow decent like this one with Breakdown and Aftermath which was really lovely to me XD (still hate those bitches as a characters but ykkkk)

Or when Splitfire is calling Megatron, Optimus and Elita old farts, she is fine when she is just sassy

Also as always Jawbreaker was cute, but's just Jawbreaker uwu

Okay it's time to go back on judging this shit >:D

So writing, I think it's kinda random sometimes, and I still don't feel like what are they actually say nobody irl would do. Like they are making so much corny text about how they love each other and always saying something about family, and I'm like bruh, I never EVER heard any siblings even the most loving one say such a things.

I also think Robby became the most useless character there rn, like he didn't nothing important, and don't even let me start talking about episode fucking 8 because it's cringefest, and I needed to stop it every few seconds to take deep breath and continue

And why this stupid hoe Hashtag is managing his dating up, as we know he has complected relation with Elita which means they divorced, but never told anyone besides the closest ppl to them, stop her from doing that PLEASE, he is barely using internet

And I think everyone got stupider, because nobody expected that he will kill Aftermath and Splitfire for crystals and like Twitch didn't expected that chaos terran will fucking be a problem, when they literally call CHAOS TERRANS

But the most got it Soundwave and Shockwave pretty much, because they should be intimidating, and they are just fucking stupid to me

Besides how they build and found resources for such a high advance base and HOW American government didn't make a war with cybertronians after destroying G.H.O.S.T. there is no fucking logic to it.

Besides i feel quite lack of characters, because Nightshade was just background character, Shlouder didn't even talk with was just XD, Megatron was almost not there neither Elita, neither Grimlock, like I'm happy that Wheeljack became bigger part of this fr, but yyyeeeee

And Cosmo, like he was just for a little moment, where everyone had their dedicated episodes :CC

And the most is hard for me is lack of Twitch and Megatron relation, besides of this one moment

Because I'm like watching this show and torturing myself, mostly for them and I hope until the season 2 end we will get it more, because after they cancelled it, we will not get any more ep.

And to stop my bickering, over all for me this one small part had more good things than whole first season, but has lack of things that I'm watching this show for and Hashatag. . . this stupid-

I gave first season 3/10, so I thing fair would be gave it too 3/10, because of what I have said

(IT'S MY HONEST OPINION NOT THE ACTUAL PROFESIONAL REVIEW)

Besides about the show cancellation, I think Hasbro doesn't know what is doing like rn they CANCELLED also transformers reactivate, and I hope it's just weird as rebrand not deleting almost finished game 🤡🤡🤡

Because it's looking like they are cancelling whole transformers franchise to me, and Ik they are rumors of making new cartoon and new things, but then what? They will cancel it again, again and again?

So In my opinion, if new transformers movie won't be a massive success, I'm not seeing bright future for transformers.

[justafriendlystranger]

I'm loser baby~ (sweet carnage)

"you're a loser baby~ a loser but just maybe-"

"If we eat shit together things will end up differently,,"

"It's time to lose your self loathing, excuse yourself. Let hope in."

"Baby play your card, be who you are. A "loser" just like me~"

I just watched the new hazbin hotel and I LOVE HUSK AND ANGEL DUST'S DYNAMIC!!! QAQ <,333 Their song really reminds me of one of my favorite ships Meztli x Trickster!! because think about it! imagine the scene going like this:

Trickster is feeling rather down because of who she is, (as I recall, BP said Trickster hates killers right? and she's a killer herself so doesn't that mean she hates herself? idk it's just a theory... A GAME- nah just kidding anyway!! back to the story) and Meztli finding it rather annoying that one of he's favorite people to mess around with is not giving him the reaction he wanted because she's pitying herself, decided to "cheer" her up with this song!

"so things look bad and your back's against the wall.. your whole existence seems so fucking hopeless."

"You're feelin' filthy as a dive bar bathroom stall,, can't face the world sober and dopeless."

"you've lost your way, ya think your life's a wrecked."

and then hit her with the-

"well, let me just say... you're correct."

"wait, what??"

"you're a loser baby, a loser goddamn baby."

"your a fucked up little whiny bitch" he says with a smirk, taunting her.

"Hey!"

"you're a loser just like me." "Thanks.. you idiot."

"you're a screw's loose boozer, An only one-star-reviews-er."

>:0

"you're a power bottom at rock bottom but you got company~"

I know meztli wouldn't say this because he has the absolute most confidence in himself, and saying he's a loser is sooo unlikely but if it cheers up his girly and stop her with this sad and pathetic reason she's in. he'll stoop down to her level so he could mess with her again ;)

plus I think he's going to be the one convincing trickster "hey you're a killer and strong just like me, we can make people grovel at our feet so have the confidence like that too. It's pathetic seeing you like this and I'm not going to fight someone as strong as me but is being an emo."

plus the line in the song:

"there was a time I thought that no one could relate.. to the gruesome ways in which I'm damaged..."

"but lettin' walls down, it can sometimes set you straight~"

"we're all living in the same shit sandwich."

"I tried to kill my friends a couple of times.." trickster said looking disappointed at herself.

"Hahah!" and you think that makes you unique? (literally has done the same thing and even succeeded) get outta here man."

"were both losers baby, we're losers it's ok to be a-"

"messed up psychopathic freak?"

"baby that's fine by me~"

"I'm a loser honey, A schmoozer and a dummy-"

"but at least I know I'm not alone~!"

"you're a loser-"

"just like me."

I think Meztli means 'killer' in the word 'loser' but he knows trickster hates that word so he instead use this =)) plss take a listen to this song and picture them together!!!! QAQ <,3333!! god I'm craving to write/see a story for these two TwT

~~~

Meztli belongs to @aesopsbaby !

and Trickster belongs to @boiling-potato !

[whatyourusherthinks]

Arthur The King Review

Eeeey it's the Mahky Mahk dahg movie! Funnily enough, I've had the exact opposite pre-experience with Arthur the King than I've had with a movie like Imaginary. Which is to say I saw the poster, we showed the trailer, but as soon as it came out there was crickets. I haven't looked, but I also haven't heard a single thing about the movie. I was not looking forward to this, even though the trailer was good. One, I am vehemently a cat person. And two, I hate Mark Wahlberg. He's a racist asshole who can't act.

What's The Movie About?

Marky Mark is a runner who is competing in the Adventure Games in the Dominican Republic. Along the way his team finds a stray dog that follows them throughout the race.

What I Like.

The racing, mostly. If you remember that show the Amazing Race, it was kinda like that except it's in one location and all the participants are suicidal. Simu Liu plays a jerk, but he's so goddamn charismatic that I liked him despite that. The locations they shoot at are also very pretty. I liked that they didn't translate any of the Spanish in the movie, so if you didn't speak the language than you just had to pick things up through context clues.

What I Didn't Like.

Funnily enough, my two biggest problems are Mark Wahlberg and the dog. I'll say it again, Marky Mark cannot fucking act. His character is pig-headed and stubborn, and it's revealed at one point that he spent all of his wife's savings to run this super dangerous race. And she tells him at the end of the movie that she's pregnant! (Marky Mark also doesn't know what poor people are, since he's in dire financial straits but he still owns a pretty nice house in the mountains with a pool and eats steak for dinner every night.) This movie has a hilarious ego trip scene where Marky Mark carries two bikes and an adult woman across a zipline in one go like he's a goddamn super soldier or some shit. Speaking of unintended hilarity, there were several moments where something that was supposed to be dramatic was happening, and but I had to stop myself from bursting out laughing. Funnily enough, almost all the dramatic moments had the super obvious product placement happening during them. I usually don't mention product placements in movies (because that's what the companies want) but I want Nissan to be forever associated with the line, "My dad has cancer!" Both of the women characters all suck. The first is Marky Mark's wife, who not only is the breadwinner of the house, but literally just exists to support her husband as he tries to get himself killed. The other is one of the team members in the race, and her deal is daddy issues. She also weirdly gets coddled throughout the movie (She's the one who has to get saved on the zipline.) even though she's clearly the team member in the best shape. The camera work, additionally, sucks. It along with the editing are incredibly inconsistent. Sometimes it's shot in standard, sometimes it's clearly hand held, other times it's back-to-back drone shots. Sometimes you can see how the racers are running and where they are going, other times it's impossible to parse because of close-ups of Marky Mark's face and, of goddamn course, shaky cam! The structure of the movie as a whole is like that. One second everyone is buddy-buddy, then at a turn of a dime everyone is yelling at each other, then the dime turns again and its back to quips and goofs.

Finally, let's talk about that stupid dog. The dog is cute. Whatever. You might think from the trailer that the entire movie is gonna be Marky Mark's team running with this dog, but the dog doesn't even meet the team until halfway through the movie. We still see him, but's it's just shots of him wandering around the slums getting chased by other dogs in goofy scenes. Once he joins up with the team it's mostly fine, but then the ending happens. The ending was so saccharine that I got a cavity. I kinda hate that I watched with movie with other patrons in the theater, because I have never wanted to yell, "Just kill the damn dog already!" more in my life. The ending is nonsense. They pretend this dog is gonna die like three times, and he never fucking does. I know this makes me sounds like a miserable bastard, but that dog should've died. "But the dog survived in real life!" Shut up Buggnutz. Stories based on real events change things around all the time. I'm sure the real runner carried a woman and two bikes across a fucking zipline. "The ending is a tearjerker!" Is it? Because I wasn't crying. I was tapping my foot on the floor waiting for this movie to wrap up.

Final Summation.

I can see some people liking this movie. It's a feel good piece about a dog, maybe for you that makes up for the fact that Mark Wahlberg made and stars in this movie. But I wrote in my notes "If they pull a happy ending out of their ass I'm rejecting this movie", so unfortunately my hands are tied.

[louandhazaf]

ANNUAL WRITING SELF EVALUATION 2023

List of works published this year:

Wanted: Dog Walker // Louis needs a dog walker. / Harry answers the ad. A Social Construct // Five times Harry and Louis try to lose their virginity and one time they finally do.

Tongue Tied // Louis’ new bestie placed a hand on his shoulder; he turned with a sway and looked into his blue eyes. ”What do you wish?” / The world spun for a moment, and Louis shrugged. It was easy. The only thing he wanted. “I wish that I could tell Harry that I love him, instead of getting all tongue tied and chickening out.” / The Irishman winked. “You never know, your wish may just come true.” / “From your lips to God’s ears, mate.” He gave the man a hug. “I gotta go before my Uber leaves me.” / He stumbled to the door, and that was the last thing he remembered from the night. ‘tis the damn season // Harry returns to her small hometown over the holiday season and starts to think about the road not taken.

Work you are most proud of (and why): ‘tis the damn season because I have always said that there was absolutely no way I could write an advent fic day by day. And yet, when Nov 30th came around and I only had two chapters, my fomo won over my fear of failure and I thought I’d give it a try, because the worst that would happen is that I wouldn’t finish it, which would’ve been fine! But then with the help of everyone who read along, I actually did it! 

A favorite excerpt of your writing: unlike most years, when I quickly scrolled through my works, nothing specific jumped out, so I’ll just say that I really liked how ch 6 rolled into ch 7 in ‘tis the damn season! 

Share or describe a favorite review you received: literally every single one.

A time when writing was really, really hard: oh boy. Okay. so if you go back and read my 2022 recap, and 2021, you’ll see that writing has consistently been hard for me for a few years. So, this year I told myself not to worry about it, that I could not write a single thing and not feel bad about it. I didn’t do a ton of writing this year, but having the internal pressure off sure helped. Even though I really miss the way it used to be. 

A scene or character you wrote that surprised you: I’ll say Zayn in ‘tis the damn season, because I didn’t have a role for her when I started, and I really liked her as minor threat slash Louis’ bff and sometimes hookup. I want someone to write a story in her pov. lmaoooo How did you grow as a writer this year: I really tried to get rid of my perfectionist tendencies and tried to write without putting pressure on myself. 

How do you hope to grow next year: i dont even know, tbh. I’ll be very happy if I match my 2023 fic count. 

Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc): I adore everything that @disgruntledkittenface put out this year. The way she keeps pushing herself is really inspiring.

Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year: ummm, I guess the ‘moving back home thing’... idk. Nothing i wrote this year hit particularly close to home. 

Any new wisdom you can share with other writers: i love you. please keep going!

Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year: what I would give to be able to write the next installment of Swallow My Words. Thank you so much to @kingsofeverything @allwaswell16 @lululawrence and @haztobegood for tagging me! @phdmama want to join in the fun? @disgruntledkittenface did i miss yours? anyone else??? (also, here’re my responses from 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022)

[punk-pandame]

for the kank hc's anon

first i love you, second i love you, and third here's some hc's"

Canonverse

used to put on little puppet shows for baby gaara <3 started with just sock puppets and a cardboard box, but as kank got better at building and started practicing to be a puppet master shinobi, he graduated to marionettes and a little wooden performance stand.

temari claimed to hate said puppet shows but every once in a while she'd give him some spare doll clothes for the puppets that she "didn't want" for her own dolls, and he caught her watching with a smile a few too many times to keep believeing her heehee <3

middle child syndrome to the max. he has a super strong older sister and an even stronger younger brother, both of whom im assuming rasa favored. his father may not have put hits out on him "more times than he can count" (6) but he sure as fuck felt neglected!

i think he never had a canon love interest not because they didn't care enough about him to give him one, but because he doesn't need or want a partner. kankurou is cool taking his time and enjoying life on his own and if he meets someone, cool! but if not its no skin off his back, he's just out here doin what he do anyway

while i love world building and think it would be so cool if they had some sort of significance, i honestly think it'd be hilarious if his face paint designs didn't mean a damn thing. he just thinks they're cool and when he finds a pattern he likes he'll stick with it for as long as he likes it

that being said, he sometimes forgets he can just? switch it up? whenever? like he'll be painting the same shit on his face for three years, thinking to himself how much he hates this design now and wishes he could do another one, and mid-paint job realizes he can just. do that. so he scrubs it off and starts over. usually becomes an all-day affair of testing different styles until he finds one he likes enough to wear for the next few years lmfao

temari and gaara are his official face paint reviewers but he doesn't actually listen to a damn thing they say. he does not want criticism he wants emotional support pls and thnx. and it is 100% mandatory. cancel your appointments, kank is having a Crisis.

when he was younger he changed looks more frequently, and would sorta treat it as a a new-year-new-me type thing. inevitably would go too hard on trying to change his whole personality along with the new look and go back to normal in a week or two, but GOD that week or two was so trying for literally everyone around him asllahdjkgha

Modern AU

obviously he's a furry. loves the "yknow like nya?" meme and still does it, without a single care in the world for who may or may not be embarrassed of it

honestly subscribes to the "i am crazy/cringe but i am free" lifestyle he'll just do and say whatever tf XD

that being said, he really doesn't do anything that crazy. like the craziest thing about him is probably being a theatre kid. he likes performing just fine, but his real passion is in the set-building.

autism be damned, my boy sure can work a nail gun

goes SO HARD for halloween you have NO fucking idea. he's building himself a gundam suit as we speak

gamer boy! loves video games and has a sleek PC set-up. started his twitch channel for gaming but his viewers were actually way more interested in all his supplies in the back and now most of his streams are just him building stuff and talking to chat, but he'll bring back the games when he gets hyperfixated on one or a new game comes out.

special interest in animatronics. he loves them so much and will ramble for HOURS if you let him (please let him please god please let him he wants to talk about them SO bad)

[alukaforyou]

i am so pissed my crazy grandma keeps feeding people food to my cats holy fucking shit even tho me and my sis told her over 10 times now to cut that shit out, and every time shes like ok i wont ever do it again,, MOTHERFUCKER!!!!! literally she has given them fried chicken, MARINATED SAUCED CHICKEN, DONUTS?, cookies / crackers, and a huge spoonful of STICKY WHITE RICE THIS MORNING my sis saw and went off on her and SHE got angry saying that she wont do it again? but thats what she said last time?? so me and my sis kept going off on her about how thats what she always says and what is she not understanding when we tell her people can be harmful to cats so just do not fucking give them any. at least my dad will occasionally give her a piece of unseasoned boiled shrimp AFTER googling "can cats have x as a treat" nooo my dumbass grandma is convinced she is right and knows all about animals so feeding them a little bit of whatever the fuck is ok, well assflash newshole a little bit DAILY adds up holy shit who gives cats donuts. and we have cat treats and cat food, what the fuck is stopping her from getting some treats if she wants to feed them so bad. for real just dumped a spoonful of rice in front of them at 7am, 1 (one) hour after i ALREADY fed them???? like hello i buy premium ass food for them, take them to the best reviewed vets, spend a shit ton on insurance, for WHAT for u to give them korean chicken and whatever you have on hand every single day oh my god. and the nerve of her to SNAP BACK! BITCH!!! 지가 잘못하고 뭔 지랄이야 씨발 개또라이네 also its not even her old lady memory problems that makes her forget shes not supposed to do this, she SNEAKILY feeds them when me or my sis isnt around like i was chilling in bed a few days ago when i heard the wrapper opening sound for these kr fried donut things we have and i was like this is fucking suspicious so i went out to look, and my grandma was standing so suspiciously close to the cat by the window literally in position to feed her DONUT when i was like wtf r u doing, and she SHUFFLES AWAY SO FUCKING QUICK and was like "i wasnt gonna feed her" LITERALLY DIE BRO DIE PASS AWAY DIE DIE DIE. also my mom HATES living w my grandma too cuz she for real has ISSUES. christ. pass away. ur like old just die bro. honestly my mom & dad have been on their best behavior after i basically surprised moved out and went nc with them, like that scared them good so they begged for me back, and i gave them a 2nd chance which is why i visit them sometimes and they have been helpful caring for my cats while im away (my roommate is allergic so i cant have them at my current apt) but my fcking grandma. getting crazier by the day. she will also vehemently deny doing anything, even tho family members have WITNESSED her doing it, and she always says "i never did that" or "fine i will never do it again" but she keeps. clowning. :) lord help me im abt to beat this elderly womans ass for real

[gagfadget]

I wanted to ask for a second opinion on this because I'm not sure if I'm being overdramatic or not. Amc making Claudia go through SA absolutely disgusted me to the point where I don't want to finish the rest of the show. I know it may be petty but idc tbh :/ it was so out of left field and so mean spirited of the writers to include it but I still want to sort of finish the show so i can see how it ends??? I feel wrong for wanting to do that though. Am I being too sensitive about it? What are your thoughts about the scene?

TW FOR TALKS OF SA:

I’m going by to preface this by saying two things: You’re not being to sensitive! ♥️It’s perfectly fine if you’re not really feeling the show anymore because of that scene. If you feel like you’re forcing yourself to watch the rest of iwtv and you’re not enjoying yourself anymore then I’d say just drop it and maybe read a spoiler review of it on YT to see how the season ends. I literally do that with the anime One Piece because I love that show but the creator is so nasty that I don’t support it financially and just get the chapters via anime reviewers. The second thing is that my answer concerning my thoughts on the episode probably won’t be the answer you’re looking for 😭 my thoughts on it aren’t as straightforward as “no it was vile and didn’t need to be there” or “yes im completely fine with it”. My thoughts on it are complex is what I’m saying lol

After watching episode 5 I kinda think that Claudia being SA’d didn’t really need to happen…but at the same time I can say that for alot of good shows and movies that I like that include one or more characters being r*ped. The Boys is an example of this. To me it wasn’t really shocking and it came off as just..a traumatic experience that happened to a character that we care deeply about and because we care deeply about her, her going through something horrible like that is hard to imagine. Maybe because I have experience watching exploitation films where a woman being SA’d is there strictly to shock the audience and is made to be gawked at. I can definitely say that knowing that she went through that is jarring and sad but…atleast for me idk if shocking is the right word..but y’know that’s just me. Its also all implied and Louis stops Daniel from prying any further into the details. So to me that scene reads more like: this horrible thing happened to Claudia and she wrote her experience about it in her diary and we as the audience are only seeing the precursor to that assault. Mostly to introduce Bruce as a character but also to see just how bad other vampires can be. To me, episode 5 was like a vampiric endurance test if that make sense? Lestat warns Claudia about the brutality of other vampires and that warning, even though it was said callously to her, was fulfilled by Bruce and Lestat himself which is why they are paralleled sometimes. Not because the show is saying that their violent acts are the same but because they’re both examples of vampires Claudia and Louis know of whose humanities are rotting away. They are the worst vampires that we know of atm. It showed them examples of what would happen if they did follow in Lestat’s footsteps and let their humanity get chipped away. It also showed, not only the audience, but also Claudia and Louis what they’ll probably be dealing with later on when they meet more vampires.

TL;DR: I do think that inclusion of it is sort of unnecessary, as is most SA in media, but I atleast understand what the writers were trying to say and convey with having that happen to her.

[fandomfluffandfuck]

mr s i have a tmi question: since u hve experiences with casual sex, i was wondering how one... eases another person into it? as an awkward ace person ive certainly had opportunities to get into it but ive just refused bc im not rly into it, yknow? so my actual question is if u had any advice on how to initiate w ppl u know irl without sounding too forward? (i guess? u can tell i have no idea how any of this works lol lack of attraction is difficult to navigate)

That's a good question. I don't think it's TMI, lol. It's more just a relationship question to me, haha. Either way, I'm down to talk about it!

First story time, just for shits and giggles:

It depends on who you're having casual sex with, obviously. Some people I've heard of having hard, specific rules and some people have a similar experience to me where it was just... super casual. If there was anything up, we would just talk. We were friends. It's fun. It feels good. It's all chill, y'know?

I've had had a friends with benefits type relationships with two people--both women.

The first time it happened, we had been forming a friendship for a little bit, but we weren't super close or anything. Once, she straight up asked me if I was a virgin (which, in general, yuck, I dislike that terminology so much but whatever) when we were hanging out alone. That dissolved into conversation about sex in general. We came to the conclusion that we were both sex positive and both enjoyed sex. She told me that she had missed sex since she'd broken up with her boyfriend a while ago and hadn't gone out and hooked up with people after or anything. She didn't want to go out and just hook up. Fair enough.

I, half as a joke, half, just, why not said that we could have sex if she ever felt like it. We were friends, and I didn't want to date her, but we got along well so far, plus she was pretty. Why not?

She laughed at first, then asked me if I was serious at all. I told her, yeah, sure, if she wanted to. And... things kind of went from there.

We still talk sometimes, but she moved away, and while I have a lot of friends that are long distance so I'm fine texting and calling. It's not her speed. I have no hard feelings about it. If I'm ever where she is or she's here, I'm sure we'll get together to hang out.

And screwing around with her wasn't an all the time, like, weekly thing. We never met up specifically to fuck around, we would just hang out and then end up fucking occasionally.

(She was a fucking bomb kisser and I have to say she wore very pigmented makeup that would sometimes run and I- I can not tell you how much of A Thing I have for ruining pretty girl's makeup (or anyone's makeup for that matter 😏). It just looks so good messed up. Especially lipstick or eyeshadow/mascara. Jesus.)

The second time it happened, I met this woman in class, so we weren't friends prior. Friendly. But I didn't know her too well. We had talked in class, just chatting, and she emailed me for help on a few assignments because we were put into a cohort for peer-review stuff. Her voice was, just, gorgeous. And she was really smart. She wants to be a teacher. I could probably listen to her to talk for hours. Maybe if we'd gotten to know each other better, we could've dated or something, but we didn't. She graduated at the end of the term and moved onto her new, post-college life. I totally get it.

Anyway, she would compliment me here and there--she liked my hair, my eyes, the rings I wear, and some other stuff. She was really pretty herself, so I'd just reciprocate. Not exactly flirting but also not not flirting, haha.

I asked her if she had a partner, between asking about her life, generally, after we'd finished our work for peer review stuff once. She said she didn't and she asked if she could kiss me. I told her that sounded good. So we kissed, and then we actually went back to working, lmao. No funny business.

We kissed more the next time we met up outside of class. Literally, just taking a break from studying.

And, I don't know... dating never came up? It was one of those situations where we were alone and were kissing and more or less doing some heavy petting. Then it seemed just like it'd be a good time to keep going and I do like eating pussy, so I offered, she said yes. She actually complimented me on my skills the same way she had complimented me before and I laughed because... who wouldn't? She was sweet.

Then, the next time we got together, she asked if I'd do it again. She exchanged phone numbers and fucked around a few more times. Not too many times, though.

Funnily enough, I think my favorite thing that happened between us was when we were in class, and I licked my lips because... yeah. Sometimes you do. And she jabbed her fingers into my side to make me stop 💀💀 I choked, trying not to laugh too hard in front of everyone (and we did go to her car after class 👀).

(Also, I just have to confess that she was so, so good. She would stay still if I told her to, even when I went down on her. She also would stay basically silent if I told her to make not sounds, no matter what I did to her 👀 It was fucking incredible.)

Second, advice:

Again, it depends on the person. Some people want the straightforward version where there is an agreement, a conversation, and some people probably are more just about letting things flow naturally.

If you feel like you want a direct conversation, it might be better to just have that direct conversation so you can find someone who wants the same thing, so there would be the least amount of confusion possible. If you're content to let it flow... I don't know. That's harder. You can wait for conversations that shift in the direction of sex or push conversations that way.

I mean, maybe don't go, "hey, have you heard of this thing called causal sex? We should do that!" But you also could. Whatever you feel like.

If someone doesn't want to or refuses, that's them. They're allowed to say no. Try not to feel too defeated or rejected. There's a million reasons someone might not want to. It doesn't need to be a result of something with you. Y'know? (Not that I think you'll have a problem with that, knowing you've turned down causal sex yourself.)

If I were you, though, I think I might go for the direct conversation. Being on the ace spectrum makes sexuality different from allosexual people, obviously, and if you're going to fuck around with allosexual people it may come in handy to lay out, hey, this is what's going on with me, these are the feelings I have.

The people I've casually fucked have all known that I have a weird thing with sex where there needs to be some type of kink or power dynamic or something more than just strictly "vanilla sex" for me to be interested because... I don't know, that's just how I work 🤷🏻‍♂️ That and I'm not immediately in for being gotten off during sex. Sure, it's nice, but I'd much rather be getting the other person off. It's just more fun. And having said those things out loud to those women, it was much more fun because of that.

In conclusion... did I help? Or did I just tell you stories about the people I've fucked? I don't know. Hopefully, I helped. Or, hopefully, I at least gave you something to think about.

P.S. Everyone is awkward, you'll be okay, sweetheart!

[mermaidsirennikita]

Have you read the Henry Cavill blind item leaks about the actual reason he left the Witcher? Thoughts on him?

I mean my thoughts on the deuxmoi ~leaks~ are that they remind me a lot of when Rege-Jean left Bridgerton. Deux, with basically nothing backing it up, said that he was a diva on set, horrible to work with, etc. Funny how this is what happens when Netflix loses talent that was perceived to be a big asset to a show's success.

Also, interesting that this leak only occurred when it became official that Henry was not in fact returning as Superman anymore, a couple months after he left The Witcher. Like, you'd think that this type of gossip would be leaked way earlier. I personally don't trust anything Deux says unless it is pretty like... visually obvious, or is backed by sources other than "Deux's sources". Deux is a gossip mill; whoever is behind that account will post literally anything and be like "HMM WHO KNOWS MAYBE TRUE". There is true shit reported to Deux, but there's also a lot of bullshit to sift through.

To be super blunt, The Witcher is a show that has had big numbers but has never been super critically acclaimed. I've seen some critics love it, some hate it. Reviews are mixed. Reactions got worse for season 2, which was just.... a mess, imo. I had no idea what was happening for s1, but I had a good time at points. S2 was really not great, and a lot of fans seemed to share that opinion. The one thing that was largely consistently well-receive was Henry Cavill as Geralt. And honestly? I don't think Henry is like, a once in a lifetime talent; sometimes I find him good, sometimes I don't. Sometimes I think he's really hot, sometimes he doesn't work for me at all. But in that role, he was good. He fit very well. He was the main selling point of that show, and I think it's kind of deluded to suggest otherwise. Other actors were good. Freya was good. Anya was good--though I'll be real. I wanted to love that ship, but she had like zero chemistry with Henry and her role was horribly written. Henry was the very clear star, though, and people responded well to him.

Imo, the only way Netflix would have fired that man would be if he was like... physically and/or sexually abusing people, or very clearly sexually harassing people. And even then! If they could cover it up, they probably would (and they have, for other big stars). That's just the reality. It's awful. But his attachment to the series meant money, and they prioritize money. It's possible that he was a dick on set. It's possible that he critiqued what the writers were doing and was difficult. He would not be the first star of a show to be difficult on set. I just don't think he ever would have been fired, unless he was truly, honestly horrible on set. It's ridiculous to me that people think he would be. Big names just don't get fired unless something truly impossible to brush off has happened--Frank Langella being fired from Mike Flanagan's House of Usher on Netflix due to sexual harassment accusations is a recent moment. And 100%, I think that if Netflix had something to prove Henry was fired due to those issues... I think they'd do it. He's not being protected by DC anymore. He's a babe in the woods. The reaction to Liam Hemsworth (who I for the record think is fine lmao) has been kinda negative. Why wouldn't Netflix take the opportunity to look like a responsible hero? If they could? They can't. And I don't think they would have fired him for ANY other reason.

And I'll be real! If Henry was being a dick on set about the quality of the scripts... Yo, he was right. The scripts for season 2 were baaaaad. I'm not a Witcher fan, but I'm friends with people familiar with the games and the books. All of that. Sounds better. Than what this show has been doing. "But the showrunner is a woman," yes and her work is bad. I do believe now, after seeing some interviews with Henry, that he wasn't happy with the scripts. I doubt that's the only reason why he left. But if you look back to like... 2021, there were rumors on the ground that Henry was wanting to leave because he didn't like the scripts and he didn't like the creatives in charge. I think it's as simple as him already being unhappy with the people and the scripts, and him thinking he had a safe place to land with DC. Which, honestly? I think he absolutely should've gotten paperwork in order before announcing his Superman return, but if DC literally told him to announce... A lot of actors have done that kind of shit based off verbals before. The world is changing, but DC is also HORRIBLE to talent, in front of and behind the camera. Gal Gadot (who I dislike) and Patty Jenkins got screwed. Jason Momoa is about to get screwed. Everyone working on Batgirl. Before Zaslav took over, Birds of Prey got set up for failure. Ray Fisher got fucked over. I don't think shit is suddenly going to improve under James Gunn (someone everyone is acting like they love, despite the fact that he's said some pretty off color shit and was backed by actors like Chris Pratt). Talent is not being treated correctly at DC... unless they're Ezra Miller!

All this being said, I don't think Henry is like... this great guy. I'm not going to cry into my cereal about him as an individual. I think he's dated girls far too young (probably younger than is known to the public) and he said some dumb shit about Me Too. But I can say all of that... and also say that Deuxmoi didn't seem to have any real evidence there, and the hyperbolic HE'S BEEN RED PILLED is kind of playing into what Netflix (and probably DC) want. Like, maybe he has been. But I don't think that's ever kept actors from getting jobs (look at Chris Pratt) and I don't think there's any evidence to suggest he was fired.

[readnburied]

Book Review: A Lullaby for Witches by Hester Fox

Date of Publishing: February 1st, 2022

Author: Hester Fox

Publisher: Graydon House

Genre: Historical Fiction, Fantasy, Gothic

This is a standalone novel and follows the life of Augusta Podos and Margaret Harlowe who happen to be two different women from two different times but with a single connection between them. And when Augusta finds her dream job, that connection manifests into her reality as Margaret tries to take control of her life, not just because of the connection between them but for some ulterior and sinister motive. And Augusta needs to figure out whether to help the poor soul or save herself. But considering the connection between them, she’s not sure she can do either. 

I had forgotten I have this book until I was browsing my bookshelves and came across it. I love books depicting witches and witchcraft so this immediately intrigued me. But after reading the synopsis which told me it’s a gothic story, I knew I have to give this book a read and I did not regret it. I’m obsessed with gothic stories and it’s hard to find them sometimes.

There are two timelines running simultaneously throughout the narrative and I’m not sure which one I preferred more since both of them are so equally interesting. I loved Margaret’s life and what she’d been through was heartbreaking. I sympathized with her until I realized what she intended to do. And I don’t know if any of you have read the story, but the author does such a good job of making you empathize with Margaret that you don’t know what her true nature is until towards the end and I have to say the author might be good at writing mystery thrillers if they’re into writing them. 

Margaret’s motives seemed fine to me initially but as the story progressed and the truth came out, I have to say I was furious with her and I didn’t want her to do what she eventually did. But I’m glad justice was served in the end but yes, for a moment the whole story did get incredibly tense. 

The characters are very well fleshed out and it was as if you’d be able to find them walking around in the real world. You just can’t help but feel empathy for literally every character, and that includes the negative characters, and yes there are a couple. 

I enjoyed every bit of this story, especially the horror, gothic bits where I really wished to switch places with Augusta and live her life. I love art and its history but I’m not that into it. However, after reading this story, I actually wanted to know what it’d be like working in a museum or an old estate like Augusta. I love gothic places so working in one or living in one would be a dream come true. 

Initially the premise of the story didn’t seem that new to me. I could feel as if I’ve read something similar to this before but after half of the story, I understood how unique and beautiful it was. I thought it would have a cliche ending but it didn’t and that’s where it surprised me and I’m glad it did because this book wouldn’t be getting its own review if it hadn’t. 

The tone and setting of the story was impeccable and so intriguing. I loved the gothic tones and I definitely wish I could write a gothic story as well as the author. And the spooky stuff that happens in the story definitely added to the intrigue, not to mention the witchcraft that’s one of the main premise of the story. It’s like the author took all my favorite things and put them together in a neat and interesting story and I’m definitely looking forward to reading all their books. 

The side characters were strangely interesting. I’m saying strangely because sometimes authors don’t care about making the side characters as interesting but in this book that wasn’t the case and that just shows how detail-oriented the writer is that they think of everything. 

The author has written quite a few books and a new one is set to come out this year and let me tell you all, I’ll definitely be reading all the books and giving you my opinion on them. And I urge you all to go and buy this books or if possible, all the books written by this author because it’s crucial that you read this book and experience the story the author is trying to tell. The characters seem incredibly real and some of the situations the author created actually take place in real life despite this story falling in the category of fantasy. So do give this story a chance and I’m sure you’re not going to regret it. 

[kckenobi]

idk why but recently i cannot stop thinking about exhausted/sleep deprived/stressed out obi-wan kenobi literally in the process of actively giving himself grey hair i just crave it

It started slowly–so slowly that Obi-Wan wasn’t even the one to notice first. He was bent over a book in the Archives, Ahsoka seated beside him as they pored over an astrophysics text. Her exam was tomorrow and Obi-Wan was ready to quiz her on the Doppler equation, when he realized she wasn’t looking down anymore.

“You’re going gray,” Ahsoka said.

He sat back in the chair. “What?”

“Your hair,” she said, nodding toward his temple. “I never noticed it before. But you have a few grays, just above your ears.” She smiled. “Anakin’s going to have a field day with that.”

He chuckled, but it turned into a yawn. “Well, Anakin’s also the one who can answer for them.”

It had been a joke, when they were young–it started with Anakin calling him “old man,” and Obi-Wan claiming his Padawan’s antics would be the thing to turn him gray. Now, sometimes, it just felt like a fact.

Ahsoka had asked for another minute to go over her notes before Obi-Wan quizzed her, and Obi-Wan nodded in agreement. He leaned back in the chair and let his mind wander to all the other things he still needed to do today–the briefing, the mission log, the report to the Chancellor. There was a strategy that needed his review and approval for the next campaign, and then Anakin had asked him to cover a meeting he couldn’t attend, and then he’d promised to spar with Ahsoka, and–

“Master Kenobi?”

A voice. A hand on his shoulder. Obi-Wan jolted forward as his eyes flew open, choking down a surge of panic.

“Woah. Sorry,” Ahsoka said. She’d moved–was leaning over him now, brows furrowed. “I think you dozed off.”

“I did?” Obi-Wan said. He rubbed his eyes, feeling the budding headache beneath them. “Oh. I–I suppose I might have, Padawan. My apologies. Where did we leave off–”

She was eying him closely–too perceptive, that one. She could probably sense his headache, sense the fact that he hadn’t slept in…actually, when had he last slept? But he forced a smile, and she forced one back. And just when he was about to return to the textbook…

His comm buzzed.

He shrugged, apologetic. “And I suppose I’ll have to apologize again,” he said. “My commander. Apparently there’s a new development, and–”

“Go,” Ahsoka said, overly positive. “I’ll be fine. I can quiz myself. Tell Cody I say hi.”

Bless her. The girl had barely been on Coruscant recently to attend her classes at all–and he couldn’t even help her long enough to make a difference.

He stifled a yawn again. Shot her a grateful, regretful smile.

And then it was off to the next obligation. And the next one. And the next.

The rest of the day was much of the same–here, there, pulled in a thousand directions at once. Cody needed his opinion on a battle strategy for their next campaign–to Geonosis, of all places. And the Council called halfway through that meeting, to ask if he could please file his mission report from the last campaign, which he said he would do. But then there was a Council meeting in half an hour, and Anakin’s meeting later, so it would have to wait until after then. And he got a comm from Bant in the Halls of Healing, asking if he could please report for his yearly physical since he was so rarely on Coruscant, and it was necessary for him to be cleared for duty. He replied and told her he’d be there when he could–whether that was today or tomorrow or sometime next year, he didn’t know.

And so he found himself now, headed to the Council debrief. He hadn’t completed the report yet–didn’t even know if he could stare at a screen for long enough to do it. His headache was constant–and he felt a bit of the aura that signaled a migraine, just his luck.

In the Council Chamber, he took his seat. Scanned the other Councilors, until he got to a hologram image and the brightness and blueness made his headache spike so badly, he needed to close his eyes.

“Master Kenobi,” Mace said, once the meeting had begun. “Would you like to start with your report from the last campaign?”

He nodded. But when he stood, the room tilted sideways. He grabbed his chair to steady himself, eyes closed again.

“Obi-Wan.” Depa’s voice, somewhere. “Are you alright?”

“Fine,” he responded. Instinct.

And forced his way to the center of the room.

He did make it through, somehow. And he was about to congratulate himself for it, privately, as he made his way back to his chair. Around him, the meeting moved on, Mace’s voice growing more muffled and distant by the second.

He didn’t even process that the room was starting to dim too.

Not until he was already crumpling to the ground.

Distant voices. A bit of laughter, wheels across a marble ground, a door opening and closing. These were the things Obi-Wan noticed first, when he started to come around. His eyes flickered open, then closed again. His head felt heavy, too heavy to lift. But then there was a familiar voice breaking through the fog–

“Hey. He’s stirring.”

Obi-Wan forced his eyes open and inhaled. “Anakin?”

They were both there–Anakin and Ahsoka, sitting in the rigid chairs of the Halls of Healing, leaning over his bedside. He was covered in white sheets, and when he raised a hand to push them back from his chin, he found his hands shaky.

“I missed your meeting,” Obi-Wan said quietly. “I’m sorry–I was supposed to stand in for you…”

“Master Yoda called us,” Anakin said. “Told us you fainted in the Council meeting.”

Obi-Wan tried to scoff. “I’m sorry to have made such a scene. It was likely my own fault–I didn’t have time for lunch, I’m afraid–”

“Well yeah it’s your fault,” Anakin said. “You haven’t slowed down since–I don’t even know when. Bant said your blood sugar was low, and she could sense your migraine, and you were dehydrated–”

“Well, the migraine at least was beyond my control.”

“It was brought on by exhaustion, Master. You’re exhausted.” He exhaled, running a hand through his hair. “Your body just decided to force you to get some rest, I think.”

Obi-Wan’s eyelids still felt heavy, and he allowed himself to close them now. This was embarrassing. Inconvenient. Pride was unbecoming on a Jedi, on anyone. But it certainly wasn’t desirable for the entire Council to see him pass out on the floor.

Anakin was watching him closely–he could tell, even without opening his eyes. “What is it?” Obi-Wan said.

Anakin didn’t answer right away. “Nothing.”

“What?”

“It’s nothing, seriously. Just…” Anakin said, and then Obi-Wan was opening his eyes just a tad. “Just that you have a few gray hairs.”

Obi-Wan exhaled, trying to smile. “I was wondering when you’d notice. It’s prime material for you, isn’t it?”

But Anakin didn’t answer. Not for a long time, so long that Obi-Wan didn’t think he’d answer at all. And at some point, against his own free will, his eyes closed again.

And then came the squeaking of the bed–a sinking to his right, then his left.

When he forced his eyes open again, his Padawans were there.

“Goodnight, old man,” Anakin said quietly.

Obi-Wan was asleep before he could answer.

[rivalsforlife]

Phoenix Wright: The Truth Reborn Again: A Distracted and Agonized Review

Picture this:

You are me. You love Ace Attorney. You have consumed every piece of Ace Attorney material you could get your little hands on, including content exclusively in Japanese that you don’t understand. New Year’s Eve two years ago, you watched the first Takarazuka Musical in horror, baffled at the characterizations and plotline. The other musicals seem just as bad, if not worse. You want, so desperately, to understand what is going on with them.

Fast forward to two and a half years later. You’re having a rather crappy time. You need something to distract you, say, rewatching an actually well-characterized and delightful Investigations stage play. While you search for it, you notice something odd. You notice.... this.

That’s right. As of two weeks ago, one of the original fansubbers of the first musical has gone on to remaster the first and subtitle the second. They plan to have the third done sometime this summer.

The long lost land of Ace Attorney Takarazuka Musicals will soon be available to the English-speaking world.

I dropped everything I was doing to watch the entire thing. As it was rather late in the night when I started, I planned to not liveblog, not wanting to use too much time taking screenshots and formulating opinions, since I’d already be watching late into the night. Turns out, I liveblogged half of it in a discord channel anyways. I screamed “NO!!! NO!!!!!!” into my hands. I covered my face with my arms. I writhed in pain. I laughed. I wept. I questioned how someone who allegedly played the games could write this. I questioned the universe for bringing this into the world. I questioned myself for still watching.

Mostly for my own sake, I want to write down my thoughts of the musical to look back on it later. You are welcome to read if you do not want to put yourself through this musical yourself. I’ll summarize my experience. It is a wild one. It ended up being nearly eight thousand words long; prepare yourselves accordingly.

Okay. Review Time. I want to establish before we begin that I don’t have anything against the actresses or the theater company. As a musical, I think it was just fine! As an ace attorney thing, it was a disaster. 

First: Some Context

If you haven’t watched the first Takarazuka Musical, I’ll summarize it right now, because if you go into this expecting it to be anything like canon you’ll be in for a nasty surprise. I left the links above, you can watch either the old or remastered one, it’ll probably be about the same. But if you understandably don’t want to watch two hours of a terrible musical I’ll just provide a summary.

Pretty much, erase the entire backstory and canon of ace attorney. Pretend you don’t know anything about this series. Phoenix Wright is a blond American lawyer (yes, ACTUALLY America this time, they use the English names and setting in this musical despite it being performed in Japan in Japanese. No, it is not a translation choice, you can literally hear them say it.) When Phoenix was a child, he was put on a class trial for stealing another student’s lunch money. When the whole class was against him, two students stood up for him! They are: Miles Edgeworth, and Leona Clyde.

... Wait Leona Clyde, you might say, who is THAT? What about Larry? While Larry does appear in the first and third musicals, if I’m recalling correctly, he has no link to the class trial whatsoever. Leona was substituted for Larry in this situation, except she didn’t steal the lunch money. 

Here’s a little graphic they made for her, how cute.

Anyways, after the class trial, Phoenix and Leona become friends. And Edgeworth too I guess. Leona’s parents are both lawyers who fight for the truth! Phoenix and Leona decide to become lawyers together and fight for the truth as well. They start dating at some point into college. Eventually, Leona moves away, which if I recall correctly has something to do with a murder case covered in the first musical that’s like a variation on Rise from the Ashes where Leona is in the Lana role. Phoenix offers to defend her after being separated for a while. She argues she’s changed as a person! Phoenix says he’ll believe in her no matter what. She saved him back in the class trial. Now it’s his turn to save her, even if she’s acting cold and remote and distant.

... If you’re thinking here, “So she’s a mash up of Edgeworth and Lana Skye, but a love interest,” then you’re correct. A lot of the dialogue in the first musical sounded like it came straight from Turnabout Goodbyes. We’ll touch on this more a little later.

Of course at the end Phoenix proves her innocence, and they sing about how much they love each other, and it’s a happily-ever-after type of ending. Phoenix’s entire backstory -- dating Dahila, meeting Mia -- gets erased or altered in some way. While he knows Maya and she’s his assistant, it’s never established how they met or that Mia even exists. (Sidenote: Maya is ruthlessly massacred in both musicals. Her characterization, I mean, though it probably would have been a mercy if she’d been killed so I wouldn’t have to see her like this.) Phoenix, having dated Leona throughout college, probably didn’t date Dahlia/Iris. He became a lawyer essentially for Leona, and maybe Edgeworth too I guess, in the same way that canon Phoenix became a lawyer essentially for Edgeworth, and maybe Larry too I guess. 

So already we’re pretty far off the canon AA script. The characters are nearly incomprehensible. But hey, at least they’re happy.

... For now.

THREE YEARS LATER

The musical starts off with Phoenix singing and dancing around on the beaches of California, something about leading you to your destiny. It’s a cheesy sort of musical song that doesn’t seem to have any relevance to the plot. Just a sort of introduction. This song will come up a couple times later and seems to be the musical’s Main Song. 

Okay, Phoenix, you do you.

He sings and dances a little bit, then returns to his office and falls asleep on the couch in a generally depressed manner before being woken up by his Official Ace Attorney Alarm Clock.

Maya enters, and Phoenix provides some of the background. Basically, three years ago, they lived in New York for some reason, which is where the events of the first musical happened, I guess? Then they moved to California, Phoenix’s hometown. Where in California, you ask? That’s not for you to know.

They introduce Maya’s character here. It’s terrible. Somehow someone looked at Maya Fey and went “this girl has no idea what’s going on ever, totally oblivious to the world around her, generally helpless” and they just go with that. 

She was described as “as ditzy as they come” in the first musical and they have not changed that since. So, Maya’s here, or at least some imitation thereof. She doesn’t have much of a role though, since the musical is focused on Phoenix and his Dramatic Love Story. That’s probably for the best. I can’t bear to see her like this. Rest well, sweet princess.

Now that the intro is out of the way...

Enter: Lucia Aleia

A Beautiful Young Woman comes in. Her name is Lucia Aleia. Her mother has been arrested for murder! She’s smiling though for some reason in this picture because she’s prettier when she smiles, I guess.

And who is her mother, you might ask? This is actually an interesting concept, I think. Lucia’s mother is Phoenix’s former teacher, Rose Aleia. She was the teacher in the fourth grade class trial. She was the one who gave Phoenix his Most Traumatic Incident.

... Also for some reason they put Baby Phoenix in a suit. I don’t know why. Presumably to match with Edgeworth, so he doesn’t look like some nerd who wore a suit to fourth grade? Or they think baby American boys wear suits as uniforms to (presumably) public school?

like okay. that’s sure a choice you made.

Anyways, Oh No, Phoenix’s Teacher Who Traumatized Him Is Being Accused of Murder! Will He Defend Her?

Lucia begs him to do it, saying that her mother is her only family left. Phoenix takes this and draws a parallel to I believe Leona, who I believe said the same thing about her sister, the Ema-equivalent in the RFTA-based case. So Phoenix decides to hear her out. Since, you know, everyone who has only one family member is the same, I suppose.

So he goes to meet his old teacher. Surprisingly, she is wracked with guilt over what she did to Phoenix over fifteen years ago. She hurt an innocent child! She’s a sinner! I mean, from canon, I can’t really say Phoenix’s teacher felt Filled With Guilt or was even a remotely decent person, but, sure. We don’t know much about her, that very well may be true.

Then Phoenix says some of the most bizarre things.

Transcript:

Phoenix: That school trial is what made me become a lawyer! When I was alone without a friend in the world, Leona and Edgeworth stood up for me! And you’re the reason I met them! I have no grudge against you! You’re no sinner. You’re my savior!

Look I. Can accept. Phoenix forgiving his school teacher and deciding to defend her because he wants to defend the innocent. Be the person he needed for himself when he was younger. Show mercy. Stuff like that I can accept from Phoenix Wright.

... But “You’re my savior!” for traumatizing him as a kid because it meant he could meet Leona (and Edgeworth)? A little bit too far imo. 

Anyways, Ms. Aleia agrees to have Phoenix defend her. He takes some time to reminisce about his childhood here in his Childhood Home Of California.

Opening Credits

We are twelve minutes into this musical, which is two hours and eleven minutes long.

Anyways, look at this picture of Edgeworth in his office. They don’t have his Steel Samurai statue and instead have a giant trophy sitting there. Miles Edgeworth, who Hates Trophies And Recognition. In case you weren’t sure just how painfully off they are on their characterizations.

How Do You Solve A Problem Like Dick Gumshoe?

Okay so you know in the Sound of Music they have this big musical number with the nuns talking about Maria and how she’s such a problem and all that stuff. Well, consider that, but Ace Attorney, and they’re talking about Gumshoe and how useless he is as a detective. They’re in a church and everything. He gets everything wrong! He’s so enthusiastic about his job but so bad at it! He got demoted and moved from New York to California, which is their explanation for why he’s here. A pretty dramatic move if you ask me.

Gumshoe’s no genius in canon but the way they present him here is honestly quite pathetic. 

Officer (singing): The only thing this guy investigates is how to waste time!

Also they call him “Detective Dick” for some reason. That’s certainly something when you only know words in English and just keep hearing people say “Dick”.

One more thing in the weird name department, the victim is named Marcus Payne. Relation to the Winston and Gaspen Paynes unknown.

Edgeworth’s Gay Little Stroll

Edgeworth: It has been a while, Wright.

IT’S EDGEWORTH TIME. I believe they switched actresses for Edgeworth this time, and she plays Edgeworth in both this and the (ominous voice) third musical. This Edgeworth has a habit of holding one hand in a sort of half-bow thing. Not completely wrong but just enough to seem a little odd. I’m probably spoiled from Takuma Wada, who every five seconds I point at and go “THAT’S A MILES EDGEWORTH THING!!!” whenever he does something. Anyways.

In the first musical, Edgeworth was the only character who was somewhat preserved. So naturally I was interested to see how the second musical handled him.

The answer... very much in love with Phoenix? It won’t be apparent now, but hold that thought.

Edgeworth: Shall we go for a stroll? Only if you wish to, of course.

Edgeworth takes Phoenix out on a lovely stroll to the nearby beach. It is sunset, painting the sky in orange hues, reflecting off the ocean waters. It’s beautiful. Serene. Intimate. Maya has not come with them to give them some privacy. In the background, couples stand next to each other, watching the sunset.

Phoenix: Times change. People change. Edgeworth, staring at him: ... Phoenix: What? Edgeworth: Nothing...

After THAT weirdly charged conversation, Edgeworth explains what he’s doing here. After his crushing defeat in his one trial against Phoenix in the first musical, he’s started doubting himself, wondering about his path. Before, he solely sought a guilty verdict. Now, he’s lost. Sort of similar to JFA but without choosing death and without the context of Turnabout Goodbyes and the good parts of RFTA that the musical left out. So, whatever, for an adaptation’s sake, it’s close enough.

Then Edgeworth, talking about how Phoenix lost his way, breaks the news to the audience: Leona Clyde is dead. She died sometime in between the first musical and this second one. Phoenix has lost his way because of that. How did she die, you ask? ... Who knows. I don’t think they say. Sad Woman Disease or whatever they use to kill off women for man pain. 

And then, Edgeworth says this.

Transcript:

Edgeworth: Though she was a suspect, you kept believing in her. You fought for her. You saved her. You were supposed to wait for her here in California. But to think that all that was waiting for you was her death... Such a cruel fate must have been hard for you to accept.

Phoenix: But I never stopped doing my job!

Edgeworth: You were just chasing Leona’s shadow! Why did you become a lawyer?

Replace the name and pronouns, and who’s saying it, and you have a conversation that could have come straight out of JFA about Edgeworth. Continuing the parallels of “huh they really did just make a female Edgeworth to be Phoenix’s love interest, didn’t they.”

After this, Edgeworth introduces the concept of Franziska. Then this exchange happens, which made me absolutely lose my shit.

Transcript:

Phoenix: 13? How is that even possible?!

Edgeworth: Wright. Never forget. This is America, (dramatic flourish) Land of the Free!

Phoenix: Did they pay you to say that?

We are only twenty-two minutes in to this god-forsaken musical.

The Other Man

Tumblr deleted my draft here so I hope I remember all my jokes.

Anyways, Edgeworth, probably utterly humiliated by what he just said, flees from the scene. This paves the way for Lucia to return. If you forgot who she was, she’s Phoenix’s fourth-grade teacher’s daughter and a Beautiful Young Woman. This is an Ace Attorney Takarazuka Musical. You know where it’s going.

She has a guest with her.

Meet Roland Smith. He’s a nice, polite, cheerful dude. He’s Lucia’s fiance. I know fiance should have an accent on the e but I am too lazy to grab that right now. He’s here because he actually was a witness! He saw Ms. Aleia at the scene of the crime, running to call the doctor, meaning she probably stumbled across the victim and tried to help him! He talks about how he looks up to Phoenix, and how Lucia told him about him, and that he thinks Phoenix is a great person and noble lawyer. What a wonderful witness he is, and such a nice guy, too!

So here’s where my head was at for what was going to happen: 

- This dude is Evil. Capital-E Evil. The Most Evil Guy On The Planet.  - He’s going to be revealed to be Evil and then Lucia will run into Phoenix’s arms. Though he’s still mourning Leona, he will learn to move on and live his happy life with Lucia.

Was I right? Was I wrong? You’ll have to find out... if we ever make it there.

Anyways, Roland also mentions that Lucia wants to be a lawyer. She really admires Phoenix and Leona and wants to be Just Like Them, and Fight For The Truth, and hopefully not die of Sad Woman Disease. Also, both Lucia and Roland call Phoenix “Sensei”, which is cute, and I’m sure there’s no way they could ruin that. It seems like there’s a nice possible mentorship thing going on, I might say, if I didn’t know this was an Ace Attorney Takarazuka Musical.

Roland leaves his fiancee in the general realm of the protagonist, a very bad move on his part. Lucia and Phoenix chat for a bit, mainly about her dreams of becoming a lawyer, and then she leaves. As she does, Phoenix notices that Roland dropped something! It’s a pendant! He gives it to Lucia to return to Roland later. I’m sure this won’t be at all important in this murder mystery and is completely irrelevant.

Phoenix remains on the beach for a while and he thinks about Lucia, and Leona, and notices that they’re similar. I mean, they both have five-letter names that start with L and end with A. Then he starts grieving Leona.

Flashback Phoenix: Don’t die. Please don’t die!

Flashback Leona, dying: I... am so happy... that I met you.

Sad Woman Disease takes the lives of countless underdeveloped female love interests a year. If you or a loved one are at risk of Sad Woman Disease, take measures now. Bad writing is the greatest risk factor.

Phoenix dwells on how much things have Changed. Edgeworth, once a proud prosecutor, has taken a break from his profession. Phoenix himself, once a happy defense lawyer, is lost and intends for this to be his last case. Leona, once a living love interest, is now a dead love interest. 

On that somber (?) note, the trial begins.

The Trial

Trial portions tend not to be as bad, because the musical focuses more on the plot than whatever the hell their interpersonal relationships are.

So, here’s Franziska. As far as this musical goes, I think she was preserved pretty well, all things considered.

I meant to only take one screenshot but got distracted. Lots of her poses are true to the games and it’s beautiful.

So, Franziska wasn’t butchered, that’s nice. There’s a jury which is weird, but they don’t do anything, so it can pass. We can safely move on to a summary of the trial. On account of being less horrible, I won’t go into as much detail, so we can move on since this is getting wayyy longer than it should be.

- The victim, Marcus Payne, was killed in a church. What he was doing there is unknown. Ms. Aleia is accused because she fed him poison called Heart Stopper. - Franziska named “Heart Stopper”, because as you know, prosecutors can name poisons. She seems to be a very literal person. - Ms. Aleia’s claim is that she saw Marcus on the ground begging for help and asked her to give him the medication lying nearby. She did, and he died. She was not aware that it was poison. - Lotta is here, I think I forgot to mention she showed up in the investigation? She’s part-timing as a nun, because that’s a thing you can do. She has pictures! One of “Ms. Aleia” kicking the victim, and one of her escaping. It's pretty hilarious.

Yeah that’s how I look when I’m murdering someone too.

Anywayyyys 

- Phoenix argues that the thing on the floor is a nun’s hood, and therefore, it couldn’t have been Ms. Aleia because she isn’t a nun, and someone ELSE disguised themselves as a nun to kill this poor poor stock photo man. Franziska asks him the favourite question of prosecutors ever, “can you PROOOOOVE IT????” Luckily, Phoenix has a witness! - Roland Smith takes the stand and immediately sounds like the guiltiest man alive.

Transcript:

Roland: I want to build a brighter future for California. Creating comfortable communities brings smiles to people’s faces. I want to make California the sunniest state there is! That’s my mission.

Anyways, three guesses who the murderer is. You’ll only need one.

Oh No Roland’s The Murderer

Roland makes one critical mistake: he tells the court that Ms. Aleia called from her cellphone, when she actually called the doctor from a nearby payphone. After all, cellphones don’t exist here in the 21st century, so it must be a lie. Franziska points out this mistake and tries to use it to discredit his testimony; Phoenix turns that around to say “since he lied he’s THE KILLER” and huh. He’s right. Roland makes an ominous comment about how this isn’t over yet before being led away. Lucia, too, runs off in tears.

Honestly I don’t want to fully rewatch this because this has already taken up so much of my time, and a lot of my memory has been wiped because I had to look at this screenshot.

Maya: This prosecutor’s more toxic than 4chan.

The whole ensemble has a little song that doesn’t seem very relevant to the plot at all, and then that’s the end of act 1! Franziska finally gets to sing, she has a lovely voice, and I will forever be mad that she doesn’t get a villain solo like Edgeworth did in the first one. The misogyny is unreal.

ACT 2

oh god we’re halfway there maybe. 

Once again, Phoenix, lying on the couch depression napping, is awoken to the sounds of his Official Ace Attorney Alarm Clock. I guess he lives in his office now. Maya isn’t there, for some reason, which I’m sure isn’t important to the plot at all in this murder mystery game after the killer last time swore it wasn’t over.

I feel like I forgot to mention this part of the musical is loosely based on Farewell, My Turnabout? Did I forget to mention that?

Ms. Aleia comes in to thank Phoenix for defending her. Lucia bursts in, declares she’s given up being a lawyer, she’s furious at Phoenix for putting Roland in jail and at her mother for not going to jail instead of Roland or something, and runs off in womanly tears. 

Well, whatever, Phoenix was giving up being a lawyer anyway. Just as he decides that, he gets a nice little phone call from someone holding Maya hostage. Oh no! It’s not actually Shelly de Killer, it’s a group of some ominous looking men, asking for Phoenix to defend Roland Smith. But he’s the killer!

Roland claims he did everyone a favor by getting rid of Marcus Payne. He forces Phoenix to defend him if he doesn’t want Maya to die. Phoenix agrees, but he has to tell Edgeworth!

... Who is having a little dramatic moment.

Edgeworth, singing while gesturing broadly: I’ll become one with the wind and water and flow toward the boundless horizon.

Edgeworth cut that out MAYA IS IN DANGER BE DRAMATIC ON YOUR OWN TIME

Well, Edgeworth gives him advice kind of similar to that second investigation day of Farewell, My Turnabout. “You need to decide for yourself what your path will be, and you must do what only you can do”, in essence.

Phoenix: huh. no idea what that means.

So naturally it leads into another dramatic music number which is honestly my favourite one. Finally, I may be... enjoying myself? Guys, there’s a freaking von Karma sibling duet.

Transcript since it’s not clear who’s saying what:

Edgeworth: The road that leads Franziska: The road that leads Edgeworth: Into the distance Franziska: The distance... Both: Is too treacherous for those who cling to memories! Edgeworth: Where lies the key to tomorrow? Franziska: I shall seize it with this very hand! Both: The eternal refrain

Phoenix is not singing, he is just having a good time here, and I respect that for him. The lyrics don’t make any sense as well, but von Karma Sibling Duet makes up for it.

Once they’re done their epic duet and the best part of the musical is over, Phoenix has another Crying About My Love Interest’s Death Moment set to some specific music.

This is extremely relevant for later. I promise.

It’s All Downhill From Here

Lucia has a Sad Singing Moment about how her fiance turned out to be a murderer and is in prison awaiting trial, which, fair. This transitions into Phoenix meeting her on the beach... the same beach that’s been there the whole time I think. Phoenix is in a new outfit to be casual or something.

He monologues a bit about the skies in New York and California, mentions he’ll be defending Roland in court, mentions nothing about Maya being kidnapped and overall does not seem too bothered that she’s been kidnapped.

Then this starts happening.

Phoenix: Such a beautiful name! Your name. “Lucia.”

“It’s five letters long, starts with an L, ends with an A, has two vowels and a consonant in between...”

Phoenix manages to connect this to his current purpose. He talks about how being a lawyer isn’t always about saving people. Sometimes it’s about finding the truth, no matter how painful it is. Even if you have to lose your empty shell of a mockery of a best friend. He just really does not seem to care. Where Farewell, My Turnabout Phoenix was in anguish over what to do, desperate to save his best friend, Takarazuka Musical Phoenix seems to have completely forgotten what happened.

He then starts talking about True Love. Sometimes true love means staying together and supporting each other, even through bad times, he says. This seems like a good sentiment, right? We’ll See About That.

He encourages Lucia to go to the trial tomorrow. She has regrets, not wanting to see her fiance go on trial. Then it just keeps getting worse.

It’s Time... for a love song. It’s a reprise of that song in the beginning that he was singing about while having a dream about Leona or something.

Yes, that is karaoke with a cherry blossom petal effect, why do you ask? This is where I, drowning in denial and gasping for breath, surrender to accepting this is not going to be a sweet mentorship-type relationship.

Lucia, having now completely given up on her fiance, agrees to go to the trial tomorrow. 

The two walk off. And just as they do...

I did not expect what was coming next. 

Edgeworth’s Gay Little Monologue

I may be hyping this up too much so I want to confirm right now that the musicals did not make Edgeworth canonically gay. They actually do the opposite and are the only piece of media where he actually is attracted to a woman (in the third musical, I think.) When I first typed “media” I started somehow typing “murder” which was how I felt when I saw that.

Anyways. Edgeworth walks onto the beach right after Phoenix walks away with Lucia. He stares where they departed and starts monologuing. I believe it has to be seen to be believed.

Transcript:

Edgeworth: Wright. Whenever you decided to do something, you always saw it through to the end. We met again at that trial, in a battle of wills. And before I knew it, even I found myself drawn to you.

Me, the first time watching this: Wowww, that’s kinda... oh well it’s probably just a one time thing. ace attorney does this all the time and it means nothing.

Transcript:

Edgeworth: (soft laughter) ... You taught me how to believe. You showed me the truth reborn. Maybe I came back... because of you.

This was where I started absolutely losing it. I had to pause here for like five minutes to take deep breaths because NO WAY. NO WAY ARE THEY DOING THIS.

Then he starts SINGING. Softly. Tenderly.

Transcript:

Edgeworth: As long as there are people in this world, there’s only one path I will follow. As long as there is love in this world, there’s only one path I will believe in!

It is VERY IMPORTANT that you know. The moment Miles started singing the “As long as there is love in this world” line, the notes of Objection 2001 started playing in the background. You know, the one Phoenix is associated with.

Needless to say... I was in a bad state. Here’s a screenshot of me having a breakdown in discord.

I can’t believe the musicals notorious for being shamefully heterosexual gave me the closest thing to semi-canon one-sided narumitsu we have.

... holy shit I am nearly five thousand words in and we still have a ways to go. Like nearly an hour. We are only one hour and sixteen minutes in to this experience and tumblr is starting to lag. I’ll be a bit more stingy on screencaps from here on.

Basic summary of the relationships: Phoenix is still hung up on his dead girlfriend. Lucia, once attached to her fiance Roland, is starting to fall for Phoenix. Phoenix may love her back but we don’t know yet. Edgeworth is clearly pining for Phoenix but seems to be resigned to the fact it will be one-sided since musical Phoenix is very heterosexual, and instead sings about how much Phoenix changed him mournfully on the beach.

Anyways, the scene cuts to a upbeat piece of people screaming “PHOENIX WRIIIIGHT”, and the trial begins.

The Trial, Part 2

Franziska von Karma has been shot by an unknown gunman, to the surprise of no one who has played Farewell, My Turnabout. Edgeworth takes her place. Edgeworth tells Phoenix, “By the time this trial is over, you will see the answer these past three years have revealed to me”, which is probably that he’s madly in love with him if that song was anything to go by.

Phoenix thinks about what Edgeworth said to him: “You must do what only you can do.” Phoenix thinks that means Lie and say that Roland is completely innocent and he’ll willingly defend him. Edgeworth is... disappointed.

Edgeworth: I shall rain judgment upon you with my own hands!

So. That’s how the trial begins.

A random witness comes in. She’s Marcus Payne’s secretary, who comes in to talk about how he had a heart condition and provides a photo of them hanging out together. You, like me, may think that she is going to be the “Adrian Andrews” of the game and that Phoenix will try and pin the blame on her to buy time. He doesn’t. She literally doesn’t do anything.

Anyways, Marcus Payne has to take a heart medication called “Heartful” every day. “Heartful” was also named by Franziska von Karma, because prosecutors can rename FDA-approved drugs now.

Through this cross-examination, Phoenix proves that actually the witness couldn’t have been poisoned -- he died too quickly for the poison to take effect. He died of natural causes!

...

Huh. But earlier, Roland admitted to killing him? So what’s up with that?

Phoenix wants to object, but he can’t. Maya’s in danger, after all!

So we cut to Maya. She’s rolling on the ground screaming for Nick to save her and being completely useless. My enjoyment of the musical, temporarily raised by Accidentally Gay Miles Edgeworth, drops drastically.

We take a look at who kidnapped Maya.

Rude Beth, Played by Koumi Maito

I nearly screamed “HIS NAME IS RUDE BITCH???” out loud at 11:00 PM.

They do give an interesting bit of information: Roland requested that Maya not be harmed, and that Franziska not be killed. Certainly interesting for someone in the Engarde role. How could that be?

But first they take some time to establish their horribly out of character Maya.

“Maya”: God, I beg you! Please save me! I promise I’ll go to church every Sunday!

I have no idea who this woman is.

Mystery Woman Who Looks Vaguely Like Maya is saved! By Franziska von Karma, Gumshoe, and Lotta, who break in and take down the evil people and run off with Maya, or whoever she is. 

So she’s safe! Good thing her kidnapping actually didn’t matter at all to anything, or else they’d have to notify Phoenix right away, or something.

Lucia’s Big Moment

Back at the trial, since Phoenix proved Marcus Payne died of natural causes, Roland is about to be let free. But then Lucia objects! She talks about how Phoenix taught her want it meant to save someone and love someone. Or something like that. Anyways, she wants to throw Roland under the bus. 

Edgeworth tells Phoenix “Don’t worry about Maya, put your faith in Detective Dick, you know, the guy people sang a song about how useless he was”, and Phoenix just accepts it. The trial proceeds.

Lucia explains that she and Roland had dinner with Marcus and her mother. He had a heart attack there and took his medicine for it, so Roland knew about his heart condition. It seems that somehow Roland instigated a heart attack and then took away his medicine - I was picturing him jumping out from behind a statue in the church and shouting “BOO!”, which would be wild enough to be an ace attorney murder.

Either way, Phoenix points out that he noticed a contradiction! No one else noticed because the photos were distant and grainy, but they zoom in for your convenience. Marcus Payne, who normally wears a pendant... isn’t in his corpse photo! Who took the pendant? If only someone conspicuously dropped it earlier in this musical! If only someone has it!

Here’s (an exaggerated representation of) what happens:

Phoenix deduces: The medicine was in the pendant, and the culprit took it from him, depriving him of his life-saving medication and causing him to die of his heart attack!

Lucia stands there and says nothing.

Phoenix continues: Therefore, the culprit must still have the pendant!

Lucia stands there and says nothing.

Roland says: Haha, I don’t have the pendant! You can search me if you want, I don’t have it!

Lucia stands there and says nothing.

Phoenix, FINALLY, says: Lucia, you have the pendant.

Lucia: oh you mean THAT pendant, the large pendant Roland dropped that belongs to Roland, is the pendant we’re talking about that’s the key piece of the murder?

I mean obviously she couldn’t present it herself. That would mean she has agency, and we can’t have that.

Roland’s Motive

**CW for this section for discussion of suicide and other unpleasant stuff like that.**

Roland breaks down and confesses. He killed Marcus Payne. Then he talks about why.

Here’s what I got wrong: Roland is not Capital E Evil.

When Roland was a kid, he lived with his father, his only family. They were poor, and his father worked as a fisherman. When he got injured, he had to borrow money from a loan shark, Marcus Payne. When he couldn’t pay up, Marcus Payne started harassing Roland’s father.

At one point, Payne attacks Roland’s father, right in front of a young Roland himself. Worn down and ashamed, Roland’s father leaves him at an orphanage and then kills himself.

Roland, upset over the death of his father, vows to get revenge. But then he meets Lucia, who is so wonderful and makes him feel like his life is at peace.

Early on in the trial they thought Ms. Aleia’s motive for killing him regarded a loan to keep a school open. So Marcus Payne met with Ms. Aleia, while Lucia and Roland were there. Roland, not wanting the family of his fiancee to fall to the same man who ruined his father’s life, deprived Marcus of his life-saving medication in the middle of a heart attack, kicked him around a little, and left.

He hadn’t planned for Ms. Aleia to be caught up in the murder, so he tried to lie in order to have her cleared of suspicion, only to end up found out through that. He didn’t want to be arrested for defending his beloved and her family from such a horrible man; he saw Marcus Payne’s death as a benefit to society. And honestly, he was probably right. When Edgeworth does the “why didn’t you go to the police”, Roland explains about how nobody ever helped him or his family, the poor don’t have the luxury of being able to go to school to get big jobs like lawyers and change the world that way, and murdering Marcus was the only way he could protect his new family.

Here, I was thinking: wow, moral complexity? Is this actually turning out to be good?

Phoenix: But you killed someone. That’s EXACTLY what Marcus Payne did to your father.

No, Phoenix. No it’s not.

The Moral Of The Story

Phoenix tells Roland that he shouldn’t have done murder. And WORSE, HE’S the one who CRUSHED Lucia’s DREAMS!

... What?

Remember at the beginning of this act, Lucia, in tears, runs away screaming about how she’s not going to be a lawyer anymore because Phoenix put her fiance in jail? ... That’s Roland’s fault now, I guess.

Phoenix, clearly dealing with his own nonsense poorly, tells Roland that he of all people should not have made Lucia suffer. There is only one person who can truly make her smile, who can truly make her happy, and that is Roland. Phoenix looks like he’s about to cry as he says this, while Lucia looks kinda confused, because, uh... Phoenix is completely speaking for her. This is the beginning of the end.

Well, either way, Phoenix encourages him to try again, and he’s declared guilty, but it’s implied that given the circumstances he’ll be rehabilitated and let out someday. Good for him! At the end, Roland reveals he held on to the pendant instead of throwing it away because it was his father’s, and it was all he had left of him. Throughout this, Edgeworth is holding the pendant, clearly poorly dealing with his own trauma. I expect there to be some sort of sympathetic moment where he returns it to Roland, but he doesn’t. He just kinda holds it and dangles it in front of Roland while he’s led away. Huh.

Then this happens:

Phoenix: Everything’s over... Wait... Maya?!

HE COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT MAYA.

She returns safely, there’s a little hug, Gumshoe directly calls her a damsel in distress, I long for death. We are so close to the end. So close. Gumshoe talks about how Edgeworth is so cool and Edgeworth is proud about it instead of his usual “I hate flattery” thing.

Phoenix decides he’s found his purpose again as a lawyer and walks off. There’s the airport scene here, except in a courtroom, with the von Karma siblings. It’s about the same as canon so I won’t go into that.

Following that, we go to a scene with Phoenix and Lucia.

You Think You Know What’s Coming?

They’re on a beach. There’s soft romantic music. Couples stand with their arms around each other in the background. Quietly, close to midnight, I whisper to myself, “Oh, god, please, no.”

Phoenix tells Lucia she reminds him of Leona. They have the same eyes. That’s why he wanted to save her. But she ended up saving him instead; she taught him how to believe again.

... Sounds oddly like a certain someone’s other beach monologue, but I digress.

Lucia, who has been following the musical so far and seen the multiple obvious parallels, finally asks the question in the weirdest way possible.

Lucia: Can I... become Leona?

Phoenix takes this as “Can I become a great female lawyer and someday die of Sad Woman Disease?” No, no, Lucia clarifies: She wants to become his Leona. In other words, his giiiirlfriend.

Her fiance was arrested for murder one day ago. She’s talking about wanting to be his dead girlfriend.

Lucia, hon, this is not the way to do it.

She explains that Phoenix in his big dramatic love song singing taught her what love really was. She loves him! She’s about to say it when --

Phoenix: Don’t say it.

Note the hollow, distant gaze. He says it in the flattest tone of voice.

It’s around here that I realize this musical has been stringing me along a flat love story and is about to turn this entire thing on its head.

Phoenix: Have you already forgotten how to believe? He will definitely return. He will be the same man you once knew. The only one who can believe in him... The only one who can save him... is you.

I think Phoenix forcibly assigned Lucia as something like a manic pixie dream girl? I’m probably using the term wrong but you get the picture. Lucia, It Is Your Job To Save This Traumatized Man At The Expense Of Your Own Desires!

Lucia looks so fucking confused and I don’t blame her. I saw it, Lucia. I saw his hands on your bare shoulders holding you close and singing how he was going to take you to your bright shining future. You have a right to be confused. I’m confused and I absolutely hated this romance plotline!

Phoenix pushes it further and I finally understand what this musical has been planning all along: Phoenix Wright Is About To Snap.

Phoenix: I believed in Leona and waited for her return. People don’t change. I just know it. That’s why people... always return to their true selves sleeping deep within.

Phoenix: You already know... the meaning of true love.

Lucia: ...

SHE LOOKS SO CONFUSED AND SLIGHTLY DISGUSTED and I am transfixed. I am starting to see the beginnings of what this musical is doing. 

Phoenix encourages her to believe in Roland, the fiance she was prepared thirty seconds ago to abandon for Phoenix. He says that is the path to her future.

Phoenix, hands on Lucia’s (now covered) shoulders: Your future is shining bright!

This is the end of the musical. It is the start of Lucia’s Nightmare.

Phoenix Wright’s Spiral Into Despair

Lucia promises to become a lawyer and gets out of there. I can’t blame her. Something’s Up with Phoenix. His fixation on people not changing. Not even their relationships are allowed to change upon the revelation of “you murdered someone”. 

What does it mean? What does it all mean?

Phoenix starts talking to the sky. To Leona.

Phoenix: Leona. Now I finally understand... why I came back home. The power to believe. The truth reborn...!

So he’s talking to Leona, explaining that he found his purpose again. That’s great. That’s nice. That’s --

Phoenix: I’ll be with you now and forever!

UM????

Phoenix: Because Leona... you’ll always be alive... inside my heart!

It’s a nice sentiment, but something is... off. Phoenix starts to sing. It’s the song he sang at the beginning, and sang to Lucia, and now singing it to the memory of Leona.

Phoenix, singing: I’ll take you to that radiant future ...

The lights fade to resounding applause. But It’s Not Over Yet.

Dance Break!

The Takarazuka Musicals have these weird ending dances to character’s songs at the end, where they dress up in these bizarre costumes. It’s... something. I encourage you to watch them for yourselves because they’re uh. Interesting. Here’s a few screenshots:

It’s entertaining, but it distracts from the real issue at hand.

The Spiral Into Despair Continues

At the end of the last dance scene, Phoenix stands alone in a red room. Music starts playing. Remember this scene I said was important a long time ago?

The music that plays to this scene, general Upset Despairing Music, is what’s playing during this. This is context I think you need to fully appreciate this.

Phoenix, alone, starts to sing to the theme of this music, but slower and a little more dramatic.

Phoenix: I want to bring you back! I believe in you.

And then he SCREAMS.

(To be fair, this is musical screaming, it’s more like singing without words. It’s not like a guttural scream, though that would have been infinitely funnier and I never would have recovered from it.)

This is where I doubled over, wheezing, and is still making me laugh so hard to this day, a single day later. Because suddenly? Suddenly I understand everything. I understand what this musical, which was absolutely not trying to tell me this, was trying to tell me.

Phoenix associates his belief in other people with being a lawyer, and to him, being a lawyer is intrinsically tied with Leona. It’s why he’s so determined to save his childhood teacher who, despite traumatizing him as a child, introduced him to the person he was so dependent on. When Leona died, he lost his purpose. He lost his ability to believe. Seeing Lucia, who he projects Leona onto, be in a breaking relationship with Roland reminds him of what he used to have with Leona. That’s why he can’t bear to see them apart. That’s why he’s so adamant that, so long as she believes in him, they can get through any trial. He wants to believe that pure belief and love can keep a couple together through even murder, even death. 

He wants to believe that, if he believes in Leona, he can even bring her back from the dead. He can’t move on from her. That’s why he’ll be with her now and forever. That’s why she’ll always live inside his heart. Because so long as he believes in her, so long as he never moves on, it’ll be like she was still alive, in his eyes.

Takarazuka Musical Phoenix Wright is a deeply broken man. He’s trapped in his own despair and can’t see any way out of it. He has little to no support system: one distant friend pining from afar, another that is an empty shell of what she could have been. He associates Leona with the prime of his life. Without her, he can’t see himself recovering. 

This is the end of the musical, but it is only the beginning of the end for Phoenix Wright. Will he ever be able to move on from Leona? Will his friends notice his sudden unhealthy attitude towards relationships and try to intervene? Will he drive them away, convinced all he needs in this world is Leona, Leona who has taken up so much of his backstory, so many of his canon self’s important relationships, Leona who has taken that chunk of life with him and left him a broken man?

This musical was made in 2009. The third musical in this series does not involve Phoenix at all and chronologically takes place before this musical. I will never have answers. I spent my entire day puzzling over this musical and writing up this piece. I am taking everything wrong away from this musical and wildly misinterpreting everything. This has been such an experience for me in a way not even the first musical was. The first musical was just bad. This one... it was terrible, but in the way that has so much potential, if you divorce it completely from what it is and ask yourself, “but what if?” What if Miles Edgeworth is secretly deeply in love with Phoenix? What if Maya Fey was murdered and replaced with an imposter, an empty shell? What if Lucia and Roland’s relationship is doomed towards disaster? What if Phoenix Wright’s unhealthy fixation on Leona prevents him from living a full, happy life?

I just wrote nearly eight thousand words about a musical I fully expected to despise. In some ways I did. In some ways this will live in my heart forever. Thank you for bearing with me through this terrible, terrible journey. I did not mean for it to go this far.

TL;DR: oh my god this musical sucks in the best way possible

[4dtk]

NCT127 falling in love with a s/o with a time-consuming job like a lawyer or a doctor

NCT 127 with an s/o who has a time-consuming job

this is so cute, thanks for requesting! i made this in a format in the ways that the boys might show their care when you’re so busy with your job :) long as hell LOL enjoy!!

brief spoilers for shang-chi if you haven’t watched! i just watched it this week lol it was really good

→ TAEIL would direct conversations to a more neutral stance. it’s not that he wants to talk about himself, but sometimes if you don’t want to talk about your case or patients, he easily slips into conversation about theories or his favourite tv show or your rundown of what groceries to take for the next time you head to the supermarket. just really normal small things that take your mind off the stress, especially at night when you’re laying in bed and just before you’re drifting off to sleep, the two of you would engage in a topic that you both know fairly well about and then you’re usually the first to succumb to sleep. taeil purposely picks out topic he knows will excite you (and bc he knows you’re passionate about it, he reads up on it which allows a well-balanced convo). if you’re rambling on about a topic, then he’ll occasionally play the guitar while laying down, just simple melodies that bring a lot of peace to the room.

“wait- how d’you like this melody?” taeil softly says, changing it instantly when you commented on the previous, discordant one. your nod encourages him to carry on with the plucking of his fingers while you yourself continue with your rambles. “so i’m saying right, it seems totally unfair for him, and you’d think that, right? but all he ever does is whine and moan about his misfortunes, plus his character is so terribly written i kinda feel sorry for-“

the halted melody prompts a sharp turn of your turn to the guitar, which you almost collide with, “what?” taeil only shrugs. “nothin’. just like how passionate you get about the show, it’s cute.” your boyfriend smiles after, ignoring how his words affect you and how your cheeks heat up at it.

→ JOHNNY is one to take you out after your work. it’s not to a super intense, high-energy place like a club or anything, but small little dates that won’t take up much time. eating dinner at a restaurant, walk in the park, small cafe trip, strolling through supermarket to make fun of brand names. if you’re too tired that day, he always finds a way to make your time at home fun. from setting up a small karaoke session, to maybe making a pillow fort, to trying out new cuddling positions, he has everything on his mind. always showing you things to cheer you up if you happen, from memes to funny videos. is low-key down for you to review crime/doctor shows too, just to see how accurate they nail it. your time at home is consuming endless pieces of media until your tummies hurt or you’re sniffling at a movie together.

“hold on- lemme show you this video,” johnny’s hand is outstretched to you once he finds the video and your spoon full of food is left near your mouth. you proceed to watch the low quality video which your boyfriend claims to be the funniest video on earth.

W-HOR? WAH? the girl’s finger in the video traces over the word “who” as she struggles to pronounce it, with presumably her sister in the background prompting her. the repeated pronunciation of the word makes you snort, while the wheezing and the loud NO in the background causes you to fully erupt into laughter. johnny simply smiles at another successful attempt to make you smile.

→ YUTA always has a hand on you when you return home. he brings you into a hug, he guides you by your back, you have to eat with one hand bc he can’t keep his hand off of you. he hopes his little touches will ease your tiredness even by a bit and if you don’t want it, he’ll stop, but it’s yuta’s way of showing he cares without words. busy days with yuta usually involve just sitting in silence as you catch up on a show or a series, or even listening to a song in silence and enjoying each other’s company. he will talk if you want to, but if not that’s fine too, preferring more to stroke your hair in silence and think about how much he loves you. becomes very sappy when you’re in the quiet of your room and generally is very fond of the small pockets of time you get to spend before you two fall asleep. likes that you’re so resolute in your job but can be soft around him behind closed doors.

“you comfortable?” yuta calls out, barely above a whisper as he wraps an arm tighter around you. there’s comfortable ministrations that his does with his fingers, massaging the skin under your pajamas while you snuggle deeper into his chest. humming, you tighten your hold around his top.

“i am, yeah,” you can’t care much for the tv show on the screen now, with empty takeout boxes and tissues littering the coffee table. you feel the gentle kiss of yuta on your head before you’re drifting off to dreamland to a scratchy, 60s jazz song playing through the speakers.

→ TAEYONG would always welcome you back with a table set and food ready, always. he knows that food is the way to someone’s heart and you eating his food always makes him happy and offers to clean-up. lets you shower first if you come back together, puts you before himself very often that sometimes you have to tell him to tone it down because you don’t want him ending up more tired than he already is. following up on this, taeyong would show his love by cooking your lunches for you. when he has the time he makes the effort to put it in a nice bento or box for you to eat. he also does the general chores around the house (assuming the two of you live together) so the bed will be a little less messy when you come back, the floor’s cleaner, the countertops aren’t so cluttered with stuff. even if there’s nothing to clean up, he always these small little things before you come back, and even if you don’t notice it, he sees the way you’re able to navigate the space or when you’re more at ease and it makes him smile.

“do you want to shower first?” taeyong calls out softly, admiring the clean house he’s managed to do up before he went to meet you, “i’ll just hang around until you’re done.”

“you need to prioritise yourself too, yong,” you pout, rubbing a hand up and down his forehead as you toe off your shoes, “how ‘bout we shower together? you did clean the house up pretty nicely.” that earns a grin and a kiss from taeyong, who goes straight the prepare the bath. you chuckle, “he’s already forgotten what i’ve told him.”

→ DOYOUNG supports you silently and listens to your day when you return home and talk about your patient or a case you’re working on. he gives you his own input when he sees fit but other than that he wants you to explain the details. being a doctor and lawyer is crazy and hectic and just wants you to know that you’re appreciated in the workforce. the way he might show his love when caring for a busy s/o like you is when he brings you stuff that you might’ve forgotten like an umbrella or your lunch since you were rushing out of the house earlier. he doesn’t mind going the extra mile to you literally bc it’s a win-win! you get your food, he gets to see you, etc. if not he’ll send someone over to pass it to the receptionist, or he’ll make up for it by meeting you outside the office to apologise and then ask you what you wanna do so he can make it up to you.

“did you manage to get the bento i bought you?” doyoung asks worriedly through the phone, holding up a hand to the staff member who was beckoning him to his photoshoot. “you bought so much!” you exclaim, with a shoulder to your ear, phone perched in between, “thank you doyoung.”

“’m sorry i couldn’t come over to give you your lunch today, angel. i’ll see you after you’re done with work, okay?” you smile at that, shooting a quick reply before you delved into your food.

→ JAEHYUN would honestly serve you once you come back from a busy day tbh. where taeyong does the chores around the house, jaehyun helps by doing the chores on YOU and only you. giving you massages, bringing you dinner on a tray, other unsaid things… and maybe even carrying you from room to room lol he’s relentless and just goes you need to rest, lemme help. big gentleman even when you reject him, doing smaller things like constantly checking up on you, pulling the blanket higher onto your body, cuddling you closer to his body when it’s cold. on top of that jaehyun also one that would meet you at your workplace and take you out like johnny, but those dates are extremely chill. he lets you choose, and when you’re not sure, he takes you on a night picnic at the field or a rooftop, just dinner, but outside bc the view is really nice and he likes the way you look even after a long day of working.

“where should we park our mats?” your head moves from left to right, looking for a suitable spot while you tug on jaehyun’s hand. he hums at it, searching for a spot just like you are. the wind’s blowing gently when you settle near a tree, mat occasionally flying up which you counter with your heavy laptop bag.

“any idea where we can get desserts later?” you call out as a half-joke, not expecting jaehyun to pull up his phone to instantly search for a baskin robbins. “there’s one close-by, wait here for a minute and i’ll go get one for you-“ you laugh before pulling him back down, “don’t worry! we’ll go together, plus i don’t want to be left alone.” jaehyun softly smiles, nodding along as he takes out the food he packed.

→ JUNGWOO has similar intentions like johnny, except he would just wanna stay home. where johnny’s goal is to make you laugh, jungwoo just likes doing things together at home. playing board games, folding the clothes together, making dinner together. it’s not that he doesn’t want to do it, but when he’s given free time he sometimes just likes to laze at home and rest from schedules. he sometimes takes himself out of bed to help before you come back but he’s lazy lolol. loves it when you’re both equally tired and living off 5h of sleep. it’s not romanticising the lack of sleep but your schedules just don’t allow you to sleep equal amounts of hours of sleep. through that, you’re at least able to connect over sleepy talk and droopy smiles while you make the bed or assemble a lego piece or playing video games. if jungwoo’s energetic enough he doesn’t mind doing the crazier activities but he generally prefers those activities done in semi-silence while you exchange jokes and funny videos.

“noooo- no! you only need to move three times, you’re cheating-“ jungwoo pouts and moves back your playing avatar back three spaces on the board game. you purse your lips, not expecting him to see it since he was particularly invested in the movie playing on the screen. knowing it was a shitty film, you tried to talk him out of it, but he insisted. with eyes glued to the screen a few seconds earlier, you took your chance to move down one more space in order to get the benefit on the game board.

“you’ll get to buy a house soon, honey,” jungwoo grins cheekily, laughing even more when he’s able to move four steps, landing on the square that you wanted. now it was your turn to pout as he flips the card for property purchases, happily placing it next to his five other houses. “you’re so annoying!” you say as you fall back on the bean bag, but jungwoo doesn’t believe it when he sees a smile poking out from behind the hands shielding your face..

→ MARK sends you a looooot of texts. your convos with him are just him spamming questions or sending you memes. on every platform LMAO he has tweets sent, ig dm’s are blowing up from the weirdass nct memes that some of the fans make, he uses the official nct tiktok account to send you viral trending videos and he’s like we should try this!!!! and it’s a couple doing acrobatics or some shit. he’s crazy. anyway, he just likes to share things with you, from songs, to playlists, to youtube videos or interesting topics like crime psychology or movie theories etc. he knows that you’re hardly going to see it in your job but he sees the way you react across the room when he sends you stuff so he’s sure that you’ll like it after you get off work. sometimes likes to rickroll you, he knows it’s an old trend/troll thing but the thrill of seeing your frustrated replies always make him laugh out loud. when you’re back home, the both of you review whatever you send each other and then laugh together at them.

“hey, babe, check out this video,” mark says in a text, pasting a twitter link to a video. the video starts out interesting enough, mentioning something about a fun fact with stunning visuals has you wanting to learn more. when the guy in the video starts on his first word, the video immediately changes to rick astley with never gonna give you up. you mutter a small fuck under your breath, gaining a bit of attention from your colleagues during lunch break.

under the table, you flip him off in a picture, which he responds with a big smile of his that’s obviously teasing you for falling for it. you’re going to get it when i get back home!!!!! on a new high, you text the message and set your phone down, already excited for the evening where’d you be able to spend your time with him.

→ HAECHAN is a mix of everything kinda. he’d bring you out after work sometimes and other times likes to stay at home, mainly takes you out to eat after work, but that’s the extent of his after-work-escapades, he doesn’t want to tire you out too much. i think one prominent things he likes to do to is vlog to you, send you videos of what he’s doing on set or at home and just treats your convo like a bank for endless videos. y’know how there’s this video feature in telegram? he sends sooo many of those that you have the time of your life watching those on the ride back home. if you have time, you HAVE to facetime him during your lunch break and tell him how you’re doing and how’s your work coming along. do i have to kick someone’s ass for making you feel uncomfortable? is that patient being creepy again? and you have to explain that haechan, no, that patient is an elderly you cannot beat his ass. he’s like i don’t care, creepy dudes are not excused!!! and you can’t help but smile at that. always wants to be talking to you, close to you. if one day, you’re able to bring him to your job, this man follows you around like a lost puppy and just admires what you do, it’s endearing.

“ah, wait- you know how the sister, xia ling was sent to shut down the ten rings army? well… i just reviewed some of the articles and-“ the video cuts into the next one, haechan’s face zoomed in as he looks straight into the camera, “y’know, she might become a villain one day, i don’t know. maybe i should review some of the comics too?”

“anyway! come look at our set for the music video! it’s sexy, outfits are fire, sets are so good, the choreo this time isn’t too hard, either.” haechan asks the other members to wave as he passes them by, no doubt going his own make-up and hair after the others were already done, “okay, gotta go- love you bye!” you smile at that, texting a quick reply before you open up a video of your own, whispering through the speaker with a promise that you’d see him tonight.

[ispent5hrscreatingavalidblogname]

Do you know who I am,do riddle me this

Ive been hit by a bus and oh I've done that too,Ive strangled my wife so am homicidal and I've been convicted and sentenced death for what might be the hundreth time and I've saved lives too I've saved alot of them and no am not Omni man,more clues?.....lol okay okay let's cut this bull crap I have absolute no idea what am talking about but am just fresh out of watching The Amazon Original series Invisible and don't give me shit about why me just watching it now I've already given myself enough chastising to remind me not to miss something this awesome ever again,so this is me about to provide a sick ass review of this 8part thrilling series ('Floreis....... mind your language!") For those of you who haven't watched it don't worry this is a spoiler free review,I think,maybe...

Okayy I might have as well just pursued potential readers,just stick around please 🥺?

So Mark Grayson's life changes when he finally gets the powers he's always been waiting for, dreaming for,things suddenly starts moving quickly his dad Nolan Grayson (Omni man)the absolutely strongest hero on earth! Begins training him immediately on the ways to use his newly found powers,he starts dating this really hot girl at school everything seemed to be looking up for him but he soon realises the hero life isn't as romantic as it seems (like he literally gets beaten to resemble pulp and nearly died a few times so he learnt pretty quickly plus then he was given some extra beaten to remind him never to forget it 🤕🥴) ,balancing his personal life with his heroic life soon began to get really impossible-his mom feeling left out and seperated from her son because "she's become the only one between the two who can't fly"(that is Mark and Nolan) with all this happening around the same time a very shocking event occurs which threatens to reshape the meaning of everything he's ever known and belief.

Needless to say am proud how am able to suger coat this series and make it look like a normal hero and his everyday problems sort of story but this series is very traumatic and heart breaking and it does have some scenes that'd leave you depressed and speechless that would have yah mind going "what that fuck" I absolutely do not recommend if you are already going through issues in yah life or having negative thoughts...pfft don't listen to me what do I know,am sure you'd be fine..over all it's a really great show and it does get fucking funny sometimes especially with those two clone brothers lol they are my favorite.

Lol anyways see I did make a clean review no spoilers or anything although I would have had more fun if i was crazily revealing all the fucking ("Floreis watCH YOUR F***'in language!")Ali you really spoil the fun in everything! Oh well it was a pretty awesome 😎 series to follow so go give it a watch quickly and tell me what yah think cause I just might do a spoiler post soon and I would start it so innocently like "these are some of the unseen effects of climate changes and what we can do to stop it.." .then bam! I would throw the spoiler right at your face and you would be like "oh Noooo!" And I would be like "Oh yeaaah I told you so" . Who am I fucking talking to Anyways? See yah soon X ❤️