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updatecrazy · 2 years ago

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A new Sons Of The Forest update 7 is available to download on PC(Steam). According to the official Sons Of The Forest patch notes, the latest update adds a new boss battle along with a new cutscene to the end of the game, as well as drivable golf carts, a rifle that can be found in one of the caves. Apart from this, Sons Of The Forest patch 7 also includes a bunch of stone building improvements and lots more Previously, Sons Of The Forest update 2 added new features and quality-of-life fixes. Unfortunately, players are still facing various bugs in the game. Today’s Sons Of The Forest update 7 will resolve a few of these issues. Read more details below. Sons Of The Forest Patch Notes - June 23, 2023 Features New end boss battle and cutscene Dedicated servers Drivable golf carts Rifle Decorative frogs Animal head trophies Stone doorways, struts, windows and pillar detached placement New stone holder structure Window shutters Updated environment on East side of the map with more streams, waterfalls, lakes, ponds, cannibal villages, rope bridges and more Some new story note pickups added Dirty/clean water system added https://youtu.be/HWwW7NF9gSA Improvements Stones now apply damage to things when thrown You can now attach stones or any length of log to ziplines rather than just full logs A held relocated structure is now thrown if the player opens their inventory Added new cat food visual Wall shelves can now store cooking pots Kelvin can now finish building stone fireplaces Improved look of burning sticks material Improved look of boiling water Improved performance of trees in winter Improved stone/rock text localization Cannibal winter clothes now burn when the bodies are burned "Collected" and "added to backpack" text when picking up items is now localized Added LOD support so that items in storage holders will disable when far away Fixed issue with armor pieces on shelves having expensive scaled mesh colliders Adjusted some duck landing spots on water that were over land Repairing floors no longer re-orders its planks Disassembling a Custom Effigy now takes the limb you are targeting instead of the last limb added It should now be easier to place furniture in crowded areas Improved player on fire visuals Added an idle variation to ducks and increased their drinking and eating rate when on lakes Added new stone building tutorials to book Added some small cannibal camps to cave D Light bulbs can now be used from the grab bag and can be added to shelves Player can no longer perform interactions when aiming their weapon Player can no longer open their inventory right at the same time that they trigger a hatch or security door interaction Fish on spears will now fall off when the spear is put away or thrown Set armor racks to only allow a single user to interact with them at a time Added some hot springs to some mountain areas Dismemberment blood splat optimized Visual fixes for cave entrances : shimmering density, seeing through entrance from distance Improved lava impact visual Setup stone beam & pillar electric wire elements Pillar detached placement now works with any combination of log quarters or stones Balance Drinking dirty water will now cause a small amount of health damage, boil water or collect in rain collector for clean water Added custom game setting to allow players to toggle the pausing of the world sim when in inventory Pausing in inventory now defaults to false in hard survival Demon boss reduced health and damage it delivers. Some attacks have longer cooldown and increased it’s damage against structures Added additional ammo and health pickups to corridor before gold room Added rifle ammo chance to ammo cases Doubled strength of stone structures Gold Armor now reduces incoming non-demonic damage by 30% Fixes Fixed Knight V’s and gliders vanishing in some save games

Improved and fixed most cases of artifacts caused by having too many built lights Improved weather occlusion and added a quality option that can be turned up if needed to fix issues of occlusion visually breaking Fix demon boss in overworld rescaling during some attack animations Fix for idle heavy male cannibal audio being audible from far away Removed deprecated option to place wire on standing stick Fixed pillars placed at the corner of two connected stone beams shifting if a stone is removed from one of those beams Fixed incomplete stone beams allowing removal of sibling beams supporting a pillar Fixed dismantling first stone from a complete stone beam not cleaning up links to supported structures until the last stone was removed Fixed stone fake pillars remaining on when disassembling a grounded stone Beam in a specific order Fixed stones allowed to be added to quarter log pillars Fixed using a repair tool on a second story leaning beam causing it to clip into the pillar its leaning against in a specific context Tweaked stone beam visual so lightbulb fits under it Fixed placing a strut underneath a tarp causing the tarp to collapse Fixed dismantling and replacing ramps resulting in broken weather occlusion for those tiles until game was reloaded Improved weather occlusion inside of the beached yachts Fixed being able to remove a pillar supporting a strutted beam if there was a linked beam with a strut on the other end Fixed cut pillar calculations sometimes preventing cutting a half log high pillar into a quarter log high pillar Fixed invalid linking issue when adding a pillar bellow a beam that connects a pillar to a wall Fixed various small building issues with struts and beams Fixed being allowed to cut pillars that are supporting furniture Skinned animals now have head removed Fix player sometimes stuck sliding on ground while in knocked down state Fix "Take Item" Kelvin order causing player to try to equip previous item before opening grab bag Fixed placing a beam between two pillars with a full wall underneath not linking that beam with those pillars properly, which resulted in a beam impossible to dismantle while it has sibling beams linked to it Fixed half log spawned when cutting window sometimes staying stuck in the wall Fixed second stick placement failing when building a fire in a stone fireplace Fixed error spam when placing a leaning beam on beams supported by a wall in some context which would prevent the beam placement Fixed stone fireplaces getting destroyed too easily Fixed struts broken off of a structure not spawning a pickup Fixed picking up a held item while holding multiple stones causing player to only drop one stone pick up Fixed error spam on multiplayer client side any time a trigger touched a log pickup Fixed placing door not orienting it as the inside towards the player consistently Fixed stone structures not affected visually by snow and wetness occlusion volumes Fixed Defensive Wall Gate handles changing orientation when repaired Fixed cooking pots not always having the correct stew after save load Fixed adding the the first item to a storage holder being difficult in some cases Fixed issues with the cooking pot loosing its recipe in certain situations Fixed issue in multiplayer where the cooking pots current volume on the fire was not being updated when another player takes liquid from it Fixed pots with stew turning into water when moved from one fire to another Fix for erroring when trying to pickup any item that is a volume container but does not have a recipe Fix for empty cooking pots getting destroyed when a campfire burns out completely Fixed issue where dumping out the flask or cooking pot would also dump out the other if the other had been equipped before going into the inventory Fixed issue with shelves where some spots on shelves would not save properly

Fixed standing fire UI interaction positioned too high Fix for getting into a broken state if the player tries to open the guide book when in inventory Fixed issue with multiplayer clients not being able to send objects on ziplines in both directions Fixed Kelvin sometimes able to get pickups far out of reach Fixed ducks sometimes getting interrupted while going to lake Fixed some activation and render distance inconsistencies on enemies and animals Fixed bug where it was possible to skin animals or creepies through collision In peaceful mode, villages will no longer have a chance to get covered in creepy spittle Chair inside bunker food will no longer show up in the inventory view Fix for having to look away from the zipline for its interaction UI to update Filling a held pot with stew that’s on the fire will now look like the correct stew Fix for opening inventory when the waiting for sleep interaction is active getting player into a bad state Fix for being able to eat from pot and light fire at the same time when loading into a game that had a cooked pot on an unlit fire Amount of stew remaining in a pot on a fire is now synced across multiplayer clients Fix for sometimes getting into a bad state with held items when equipping previously held item at the same time as performing another action like eating Fix for ziplines not getting destroyed when attached to trees that are not LOD 0 or other destructible world objects that are not trees Fixed missing visuals for one of the mushroom pickups Fix for boiling audio continuing to play if the fire that an active cooking pot is sitting on is destroyed Fixed cooking not always taking the satisfied recipe that has the most ingredients Fixed sporadic collision on laptops after they have been broken Audio Added all the missing mouseover and pickup events (Action Camera, seeds, lightbulb heads) Updated distances on flare audio attenuation and tuned levels Impact sound effects are now also triggered when they hit other pickups so that a pile of pickups would make sound Download free Sons Of The Forest update 7 on PC.

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luiina · 2 months ago

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I think it would be something like this:

Wilbur: he would do a little bit of evrything, just chatting streams. He would have stupid ass debates with Quackity as a guest, with the topic being something along the lines of "what's the best biome to live on", "what's the superior mithical creature", "best superpower to have", etc. Somehow they always end up screaming bloody murder at eachother, but they have so much fun, so they always tune in for silly little debates. He would also do guitar streams, or he would go to the sea to film salmons and talk about them for hours on end. I also see him doing book analysis from time to time, except he is unreliable af. Sometimes he gets drunk or stoned on stream and bitches and moans about L' Manburg and Fundy not wanting to have anything to do with him anymore.

Tommy: a prank streamer for sure. He would go around the server pulling pranks on anyone and recording them. Tubbo is a recurrent guest. Also, skits. And streams dedicated to cuss out Dream in any way possible. Chill streams from time to time, with him mining or knitting something in his ugly ass dirthouse.

Tubbo: he talks about nuclear power so enthusiastically. Also shows how to engineer stuff that looks very illegal, but he's cool. Michael appears on stream often, Tubbo can't stop gushing about him. Most of the time, he streams alongside Tommy.

Technoblade: farming streams, weaponery crafting and enchanting tutorials, 100 ways to cook potatoes (live cooking), sometimes gives out combat tips. Chill streams where he reads greek miths.

Philza: similar to Techno's streaming style. He makes survival streams in the most mind blowing places you can think of. Also makes emergency crafting tutorials for so many things. Shows viewers how to befriend crows and tries to encourage people to worship Kristin because he's sad she dosen't have as many followers as she did millenia ago.

Quackity: Las Nevadas propaganda left and right. He films the casino so much. Ecourages gambing addiction. Rambles about his hate for Wilbur Soot, talks about doing politics 'the right way'. He sometimes does papework streams. He just sits on his desk and complains about the incompetence of his employees.

Fundy: his streams feel like a personal diary. He records his thoughts, talks about his dreams and tries to make sense of them, it's all very personal. He hasn't got many viewers, it feels too personal to watch. Wilbur, however, tunes into the streams as often as he can, since they are his only way to find out about his son's life.

Dream: he barely even streams. He's got much better things to do. When he does, it's in response to Tommy's streams insulting him.

George: 24/7 sleep streams. All this dude does is sleep in a bed at the center of the forest. People still put his streams on as white noise or asmr. And because George is a sight for sore eyes even with srooms growing out of him.

Ranboo: he dosen't stream much, but he does cooking streams. Chaotic ones. His skills aren't the best, but it's comedic gold, so he gets many views.

Niki: similar to Ranboo. She does baking streams. Good ones. And mostly just chats with the viewers. She isn't too big on streaming.

Slimecicle: he does chill streams where he attempts to study and understand humans in order to become the closest thing to a human he can be. Also tries to learn widely spoken languages.

((Wanted to do others but tbh I don't know what kind of streams they would make.))

If the DSMP characters were streamers... what would they be streaming?

When they're not live streaming their criminal activities, of course.

#dsmp #dream smp

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gods-revolver-twice-as-shiny · 4 years ago

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I'll be making this into a long fic, but for now I chose to keep it short. Hermitcraft x Dream SMP crossover

Title: button

Grian sat down at the oak wood table, brow furrowed. Another day, another failed attempt to reconnect to Hermitcraft. The strange glitch that had caused the border to fall in the first place must have been repaired, for the world border was back up and running. His communicator didn’t work outside of his home server, and Phil’s crows (who insisted on following the man everywhere, and who Phil had put up to the task of flying between the severs, trying to gather intel on the border glitch and if people were trying to find him) haven’t delivered any news.

The builder glanced out the window as the sun set over the horizon. Past that was Hermitcraft. His home. What was Mumbo doing? Scar? Iskall? Xisuma? How was the war progressing without him? Did anyone notice his absence? No, Grian, don’t get sad. Happy thoughts only...Happy thoughts.

“Grain!”

Torn away from his thoughts, Grian looked up to see Philza, his dark grey wings fluffed up in distress. “Wil’s sent a letter.” The avian said, holding up a piece of paper.

“Well, that’s good!” Phil had been under extreme stress these past couple of days since Wilbur hadn’t sent a letter in weeks and the past few he had sent were...concerning, to say the least. “What’s it say?”

Another letter should have been a relief, but from the look on Phil’s face, Grian concluded that this letter was everything except relief.

“It’s just a date, time, and coordinates. November 16th, noon, with a set of coords in L’Manberg…” Phil’s voice trailed off as his dark emerald eyes scanned the page, over and over, as if he were looking for more writing than just a simple date.

“That’s tomorrow, innit?” Grian questioned, trying to distract the man from his distress. That’s how Grian ignored his. Happy thoughts. Happy thoughts. Happy thoughts. “I mean, you’ll be able to see your sons, check up on Wil?”

“Something doesn’t feel right about this, Grain.” Even after all this time together, Phil still called him Grain. Grian stifled a laugh, as it wasn’t the appropriate time to giggle. “His last few letters concerned me. He mentioned something in his last one about 11 and a half stacks of TNT.” Phil looked Grian dead in the eye and whispered, “Grain, I think Wilbur is going to blow L’Manberg!”

“But why?” Grian attempted to rationalize with the distraught Phil, who was now pacing across the room making stressed-out bird noises. “He won the election, shouldn’t he be content with that?” This type of stuff never happened on Hermitcraft. There were never serious talks of blowing up anyone’s builds, much less an entire country! The only time TNT is used is in pranks, and they always helped clean up after.

“You clearly don’t know Wilbur...He’s a force of chaos, I’ll tell you that. A creative little shit who always comes up with new ways to get what he wants. If he wants L’Manberg gone, then he’ll go to crazy lengths to achieve that goal.”

Silence fell.

“We need to get to L’Manberg. Now. It’s about a day’s flight from here, and we need to leave now if we want to get there as fast as fucking possible.” Phil tucked the letter into the pocket of his dark green kimono and flexed his wings. Unlike Grian, who used the sleek and slim elytra to fly about, Philza had a pair of actual feathery wings. Upon arrival, Phil explained that he was a bird hybrid, also known as an avian. He had feathers on the sides of his face and neck with elfish ears. Back on Hermitcraft, every member of the server was human.

Grian and Phil started out on their journey north, towards the world border of Dream SMP. The sun had risen, and the world border was in sight. Phil stated that Dream, the apparent Admin of the server, had agreed to let up the border for a few seconds to let Phil and Grian inside. Phil took a rest on a tree, breathing heavily after hours of non-stop flight.

“You alright, Big P?” If Phil could nickname him Grain, Grian would nickname him as well. A smile twinged across Phil’s face.

“Ahh...You sound so much like my youngest, Tommy. He says that to people too. You remind me of him so much. Right down to your red shirt and the aura of pure, unbridled chaos you emit.”

Both men laughed. Grian really enjoyed Phil’s laugh, and despite how giggly and giddy the avian usually was, it had been a few days since he had last heard him laugh. Wilbur’s lack of letters had really spooked him.

“Will you stay?”

“Hmm?”

“In L’Manberg. I mean, it’s closer to your sons.”

Phil shrugged and drank a potion of strength, and stood.

“I might, depending on what happens. If my theory is correct, and Wilbur is going to blow the place up, then I’ll probably stay. Just to help him out and help clean up y’know? Maybe I’ll be able to convince him to come home. Before you got here, I was...really lonely.”

“Well, you won’t be lonely anymore! Since I can’t return home yet, I’ll be your friend so you don’t have to be lonely!”

“Thanks, Grain.”

“You’re welcome, Big P!”

The two rose and started to fly towards the world border. Maybe Grian could make a new home on Dream SMP. The builder already started making plans for an epic build, having a vague idea in his head. However, he would have to inspect the landscapes available to see what his block palette would be and what style his build would be. Grian thought of his mansion back home and wanted to build something similar to remember it.

“Oi! Grain! You there mate?”

Grian shook his head as he was, again, dragged from his daydreams by Phil. They had arrived at the world border. “I’ve sent word to Dream, he should be letting us in soon.”

“Alrighty! What kind of base do you want to build if you stay?”

Phil just shrugged. “Eh. Don’t know just yet. Don’t want to start anything too ambitious, like a Hardcore project.”

Grian kept forgetting that this man held the world record for the longest Hardcore run. Phil was only 5”4 and didn’t look that intimidating. He looked loving and fatherly, and Grian considered Phil to be like a father to him. But the man was a dedicated Hardcore player, and could easily take Grian down in a fight. It scared him, sometimes, about how little he actually knew about Phil.

“Alright, mate, let’s go.” The blue striped border had been removed by the mysterious admin, and the two flew into Dream SMP. Grian felt a buzz from his communicator and pulled it from his pocket.

Unlike in Hermitcraft, when a member joins the server (especially a new member), the entire chat would be flooded with ‘hello!’ messages. However, on the Dream SMP, there were one or two directed at Phil. How peculiar. Phil went silent as they flew over the woods and forest. In the distance, Grian could see what appeared to be a city. That must be L’Manberg. It wasn’t as big or as grand as some builds on Hermitcraft, heck his own base would have taken up over half of the area if he lived there. On a tall pole lay what Grian assumed was the flag of L’Manberg, inky black, with a fiery red arch and X. Interesting design. Phil didn’t go into the city, however, he flew towards the coordinates that Wilbur had written in his letter, his brow furrowed. Fireworks crackled and popped throughout L’Manberg.

Grian landed with Phil, in front of a small tunnel that bore deep into a hill that was just outside the country.

“It’s now or never. Grain, stay behind me.” Phil tucked the letter away and led Grian through the tunnel, and into a compact stone room. Carved into the wall were words. No, not just words. Lyrics.

I heard there was a special place,

where men could go and emancipate.

From the brutality and tyranny of their rulers.

Well, this place was real, you needn’t fret,

With Wilbur, Tommy, Tubbo, fuck Eret.

It’s a very big place, not blown up L’Manberg.

MY L’MANBERG

MY L’MANBERG…

Those lyrics were carved all over the stone walls, and in the middle, was a stone button. In front of that button, was Philza’s eldest son, Wilbur.

Grian had never actually seen Wilbur before, only in an old picture of when Phil, Wilbur, and Phil’s other two sons, Tommy and Technoblade, won MCC 4. In that picture, Wilbur wore a cute yellow sweater with a brown beanie, with a shimmering smile on his face.

The man that stood before them now was not that person. It couldn’t be. Wilbur stood, hunched over a stone button, whispering to himself. He donned a brown trenchcoat and ditched the beanie.

“What are you doing?” Phil asked.

Wilbur turned to face them. His eyes had no emotion in them, his smile no longer shimmered. Standing before them was an insane man.

“I will admit,” Wilbur said. His voice sent a chill down Grian’s spine, “Do you know what this is? What this button is?” Phil’s speculations appeared to be true. Wilbur was trying to destroy L’Manberg.

“Uh huh. I do.” How, how could Phil be so calm?

“Have you heard the song? The song on the walls?” Wilbur’s fingers gently ran over the words ‘MY L’MANBERG’. His eye twitched, “I was just making a big point you know? About how there was a special place, it was a special place. But that's not there anymore.” Wil’s voice lowered to a hush.

“It is there, Wil, it's out there.”

“PHIL I’M ALWAYS SO CLOSE TO PRESSING THIS BUTTON! I’VE BEEN HERE LIKE SEVEN OR EIGHT TIMES--” Voices from above cut Wilbur off. Grian could hear footsteps above them. Wilbur turned his eyes to the stone ceiling and lowered his voice. “Oh they're going to come…I need to block this off.” Wilbur hastily piled blackstone bricks in the doorway, which not only sealed whoever “they” were out, but also sealed Grian, Phil, and Wilbur in.

“Oh Phil...I’ve been here so many times.”

Numerous fireworks exploded outside.

<Tubbo_ went off with a bang due to a firework fired from [Rocket Launcher] by Technoblade>

“Oh they’re fighting, they’re fighting…” WIlbur whispered, sounding tired.

“And you just want to...to blow it all up? You fought so hard for this land, Wilbur, and you just want to...destroy it all?” Phil tried to reason.

“I don’t even know if the button works anymore, Phil, I could press it, and it might--”

“Do you want to risk it? There is a lot of TNT potentially connected to that button.”

Wilbur seemed to hear him. His breathing got heavier as he returned to that hunched over position over the stone button. What was this place? Nothing serious ever happened on Hermitcraft. There were no seriously high stakes, there were no serious threats, no serious danger. It was all in good fun.

“There...there was a saying, Phil...by, uh, by a traitor. Once part of L’Manberg, don’t know if you ever heard of Eret, but he had a saying.”

Wilbur looked up at Phil. Grian could see the familiar resemblance between the two, they shared emerald green eyes.

“It was never meant to be.” Wilbur whispered that phrase, and pressed the stone button.

#dream smp #hermitcraft #dream smp x Hermitcraft #grian #fic #philza Minecraft #phil #philza #wilbur soot #wilbur #button room #angst #dream smp lore #c!Phil #c!Wilbhr #Insanebur

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zombiesbecrazy · 6 years ago

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strangers and lost ones

Summary: Magic, Bruce had long since decided, was frustratingly random and he very little patience for it.

AO3

Note: This stemmed out of the batfam discord server and a conversation about neonatal abstinence syndrome and then it got wildly out of hand. This is for @helplesslynerdy and @androbeaurepaire, because the conversation inspired this fic. Andro also made awesome art that inspired this fic, which you can find and love and appreciate HERE

Magic, Bruce had long since decided, was frustratingly random and he very little patience for it. From an outsider perspective he could appreciate the artform; the skill, talent and dedication it took magic users told hone their craft to accomplish great things, but as a man dressed up in armour currently trying to outsmart someone who could conjure things out of nothing and rain lightning down from the skies it was just exhausting, especially after having spent days tracking down the offender only for them to slip through dimensions to disappear.

This was the fourth time he had tracked down Klarion in the past five months and at this point part of Bruce was hoping that he would just get tired of this game of cat and mouse that they’ve been playing and just stay in his own damn dimension for a while to give Bruce time to test the prototype he and Zatanna had been working on to seal access between the two worlds.

Klarion cackled as he opened the doorway to his home, casting out a final curse causing yellow sparks to blast around the field, before he and Teekl escaped through his portal back to Witch World. Again.

Bruce ducked and dodged, missing the spell by inches, but he heard a shout behind him, Jason’s familiar yelp of surprise when something caught him unaware, and his heart jumped into his throat and sank into his stomach at the same time and he turned and ran to where his back up for the evening had been fighting from.

But they weren’t there. Not exactly.

Instead of Red Hood and Nightwing, Bruce found a baby and a small child, curled up together on the forest floor in tiny, maskless versions of their uniforms, somehow less armor and more like footie pyjamas, but easily recognizable. Bruce crouched down and picked up tiny baby, Jason, who now that Bruce was closer to him, was even younger than originally thought at first glimpse, days old at best. Bruce had held babies before, countless of times both as Bruce, where people seemed to thrust them into his arms for photo ops, and as Batman, when people always wanted to pull them away because they had just been rescued, but he had never held one with this much personal meaning to him before. He had missed all of his kids at this age, when they were absolutely helpless and dependent on others in the world for everything beyond breathing. Jason was so small that Bruce could barely even notice the weight in his arms, less than five pounds and impossibly fragile, and all he could do was coo in attempt to settle the trembling baby.

He directed his attention to the older boy and Dick was staring at him with wide blue eyes, sitting back on his hands and feet like a crab and schooched farther away from Bruce, just out of arms reach, as soon as Bruce attempted to get closer.

Had Klarion somehow de-aged them twenty years? It made sense based on the apparent age of them. Jason’s twentieth birthday had been mere days ago and as much as it was terrifying to have a newborn baby in his arms, Bruce had to let out a sigh of relief because it was a good thing Tim, Cass or Damian weren’t there because Bruce wasn’t sure what would have happened then. “Dick?” It wasn’t a common event, but de-aging was something that had been known to happen, and there were two regular ways that it seemed to go. The person either retained their memories from their time as an adult and was just trapped in a younger version of their body or their minds were regressed along with their body back to their corresponding developmental stage. Both weren’t without their challenges, but only one of the two targets could tell him which it was, because even if Jason’s adult mind was in the baby, he wasn’t able to communicate it. “Can you tell me how old you are, chum?”

The child stared at him for a moment longer before holding up a shaking hand with four fingers extended. Four tiny and delicate fingers that he then closed again tight and curled up into a tight ball, eyes darting around quickly, looking at the forest clearing they were in in bewilderment before looking back to Bruce and sucking in a quaking breath that shook on every part of the inhale. The child, his son, was terrified and confused and did not remember that he was a twenty four year old superhero at all.

“I don’t know where my parents are,” whispered Dick, voice high and soft, and tears started dripping down his cheeks. He struggled to swallow and took another deep breath. “I think I’m lost.”

Bruce’s heart shattered at the words, not just at the verbal confirmation that Dick and Jason had reverted twenty years in mind as well as body, but that Dick sounded so scared. It wasn’t an emotion that Dick often let show as an adult and seeing it now, so open and raw, had Bruce wanting more than anything to wrap him up in his arms and assure him that everything would be alright but he couldn’t because four year old Dick, who appeared to be teetering on the edge of a very much deserved meltdown, didn’t know Bruce at all and probably wouldn’t react well to that at all.

“I know, Dick.” A lot of kids, even those who had toys of him and knew that he wouldn’t hurt them, found the Batman costume terrifying in person, especially the mask, so pulled off the cowl and gave his hair a shake so that Dick would be able to see his face, a small attempt to let him know that he wasn’t a monster but Dick’s expression didn’t change in the slightest. Bruce huffed out a short breath, and looked at the ground, because of course Dick didn’t bat an eye at the mask. At four he would have spent his whole life travelling with Haly’s, surrounded by people in costumes and masks. He tried again. “My name is Bruce and I’m going to look after you for them while they are gone.”

The small boy finally looked away and buried his face into his knees, and his little body shook. “But I don’t know you,” he finally mumbled. “I’m not supposed to go with strangers.”

Something snapped into place for Bruce. Of course the child knew that he shouldn’t go with strangers, especially with travelling from place to place it would have been something repeated over and over again by his parents, but it was also very possible that because of that lifestyle, Dick had never been left alone with a stranger at all. Never had a babysitter that he hadn’t grown up with, hadn’t been dropped off at daycare or first day of school. Bruce was quite possibly the first stranger that Dick had ever met in person and not just seen from a distance in a circus crowd. “I understand, and that is very smart, but I can’t leave you here all by yourself.” Dick’s head rose from his knees, face red and a mess of tears, and he looked around the field again before settling back on Bruce, but didn’t say anything. “I’ll take you back to my house and we’ll wait for your parents there.” He didn’t know if that was going to work, if four year old Dick would ask how they would get in contact with his parents, how they would know where to find him. Bruce rocked the baby in his arms gently, and tilted his chin down at him. “You can help me look after Jason.”

Dick’s eyes dropped and then widened, apparently not having registered that Bruce was holding a baby in his arms before with everything else that he was trying to absorb. He uncurled from his ball and leaned a little closer to Bruce, trying to look at the tiny version of the brother that he didn’t know he had. "Is he lost too?"

"I think so."

Dick straightened up, squared is tiny shoulders in resolve and rearranged his face into a smaller version of one Bruce knew quite well on Dick; fierce protection. It frankly looked adorable on a small child in a pyjama version of the Nightwing costume. "I'll take care of him." I don't know you but I'll protect the baby. "Do you know my dad?" Dick asked, not taking his eyes off Jason.

“I’ve never met him,” Bruce admitted because it felt like a test more than it did genuine curiosity. He could have lied, said that he did know John Grayson if for some reason that made Dick feel better about him, and fake his way through whatever questions Dick followed up with, but it didn’t seem right to lie to him any more than was necessary. “But I do know Mr. Haly, if that helps any.”

That seemed to catch Dick’s attention back and he looked up at Bruce again, still uncertain but a little more at ease, tension easing from his frame. “You know Pop?” He slid closer to Bruce, finally back within reach, close enough that if he wanted to, Bruce could reach out and run his hand through Dick’s soft hair.

“I do.”

That seemed to be the deciding factor for Dick, because he got to his feet and held out his hand to Bruce. “Okay. You can look after me until Mama comes.” He was still scared, as he absolutely should be, but between wanting to look out for the baby and Bruce saying that he knew Pop Haly was enough to make him feel like going with a strange man was a better option than staying alone in an empty forest. As glad as he was the Dick had agreed to go with him without a fight and he didn’t have to drag him kicking and screaming to the car, it made Bruce nervous how easy it was to convince the child to got with a strangers in a scary costume into a car, with only the slightest of prompting. It was terrifying how much trust was being placed in his hands. Bruce got to his feet, made sure that Jason was snug and secure in his arm and held Dick’s tiny hand and led him back to where they had left the car.

They got to the car and Dick stopped short, looking at it in awe. “Your car is cool!”

“Thank you. My son named it the Batmobile.”

“You have kids?”

“I do. Five, but they are mostly all grown up now.” Or they were usually all mostly grown up at least.

Bruce paused at the car and tried to think about logistics. The car had taken a lot of damage earlier in the night as they had been chasing down Klarion and the autopilot function was offline and the steering column was malfunctioning and he was going to need both hands to drive home, which left the problem of what to do with Jason. Considering all of his options, he looked down at Dick. “Have you ever held a baby before?”

“Once, but she was bigger.” Dick bit his lower lip and looked at the baby in Bruce’s arms. “He’s really little.”

“He’s brand new,” and probably a premie. Bruce detached his cape and laid it on the hood of the car before carefully laying Jason in the middle before wrapping him tight into a burrito wrap. This was a terrible idea, but it was the best that he had right now if he was going to be able to drive back to the cave. “I’m going to need you to do a very important job for me, Dick. Climb into the backseat and put the seat belt on.” If he was going to drive with a four year old holding a newborn without car seats in a car that was absolutely not street legal, they were going to sit in the backseat even if it was only for some pretense of safe decisions. Dick climbed in, Bruce resisting the urge to give him a boost, and pulled the belt across him. “Do you need help with the buckle?”

“No, I can do it.” It took him a few tries, but he got it locked in place and smiled up at Bruce triumphantly.

“Good job,” Bruce said and then smiled as Dick kicked his legs against the seat at the praise. “Now, I’m going to put Jason in your lap and you are going to hold him like this.” Bruce arranged Dick and Jason in a way that was going to be the best that he could do in the moment. “Can you hold onto him like this until we get to my house? Keep him safe in the car?”

“I can do that.” He looked down at the tiny baby. “I’ll keep you safe, Jason.” His head snapped back up to Bruce, expression serious and dour, like it did when Dick saw an unexpected bomb as an adult. “What if he cries?”

“Just remember that it isn’t anything you’ve done. Babies this small mostly just cry when they are hungry and we’ll get food for him at my house.” He looked at his first two children in the car, curled up together in a way that in his wildest dreams he never thought he’d get to see and fought the urge to take out his phone for a picture, knowing that the cameras in the car would cover that for him. “If something happens and you think you need to let go, tell me and I’ll stop the car right away to help you, alright?” Dick nodded and tightened his arms up around Jason, either so that he could be sure that he had him or that he could show Bruce that he was taking his job seriously, Bruce wasn’t sure, but it was as good as it was going to get.

He slipped into the front seat, frowned as the engine turned over in a struggling way, but managed to get on the road without a lot of issues. He’s glad that he hadn’t tried to drive while holding Jason because the steering was even worse than he had thought, pulling severely to the right and he had to overcompensate to keep the car straight on the road. He was headed back towards Bristol, driving through the heights of Gotham, under the speed limit, when a call came through from the cave.

“Master Bruce? Is everything alright.”

“Things are,” he shook his head as he tried to sum up what happened before he settled on “complicated.” He looked at Dick in the rear view mirror and saw that he was being watched with interest. He didn’t know how to best explain to Alfred without potentially frightening tiny ears not understanding properly what was going on before he decided to be honest, but while using big words and hope that Dick didn’t understand what they meant. “There has been a mystical chronological regression anomaly in regards to Nightwing and Red Hood. I’ve found two unattended minors and I am transporting them home now. My new young friend Dick is listening from the backseat. He’s doing a very good job of holding on baby Jason for me.” He saw Dick beam at the praise, but kept looking at Jason’s face.

Several seconds passed in silence before Alfred responded. “That explains the changes in their vitals, I suppose,” Alfred muttered, more to himself than Bruce, and it sounded like he was looking something up on the monitors, keys clicking quickly in the background. “They are both unharmed?”

“It seems so.” Dick hadn’t said anything about any injuries and Jason hadn’t been crying at all, but he hadn’t actually checked either of them out physically, instead choosing to get out of the field.

Alfred hummed and there was more typing and clicking on his end of the line. “In that case we may need to take a look at Master Jason in the med bay when you arrive. Nothing to be alarmed about, but I’d like to examine him thoroughly to be certain.”

Minutes later, Bruce drove into the cave and Alfred rushed over to meet them in the parking area as the car shut down and the automatic doors opened. Bruce got out and came around to Dick’s side where Alfred was already crouched down and introducing himself.

“Hello, Master Dick. My name is Alfred. I heard that you were looking after the baby.” Dick nodded, but said nothing, maybe nervous again now that they had arrived at their destination and in the face of yet another unknown stranger. “Would you be willing to let me take him? I would like to give him a medical exam to make sure he is healthy.”

Dick’s arms tightened around Jason. “Will you hurt him?” The little voice shook, fear back in his eyes as he looked to Bruce before turning back to Alfred’s kind face.

“I’m going to use a needle to take a little of his blood and it will pinch, so he may cry, but no.”

“Like a doctor?”

“Yes, my boy. Exactly like that.” The small boy looked at Alfred inquisitively, trying to discern about whether he should let him take Jason or not, but Jason took that moment to let out a sharp cry and Dick loosened his grip in surprise. He nodded quickly at Alfred, who scooped him up in a practiced and steady way, rubbing his back through the cape burrito. “You can come watch over him while I do the examination.” Dick unclipped his seat belt and clambered out of the car, determined on following Alfred. He got a few feet away from the car and then ran back and grabbed Bruce’s hand and tugged him along after Alfred.

Alfred laid Jason down on the bed, and unwrapped the cape, and took in Jason’s appearance and then looked down at Dick before turning to Bruce. “Did you stop on the way home and buy… costumes?”

Bruce shrugged, because yes, he had noticed that they were in kid versions of their costumes, but hadn’t really had a chance to think too much about it. “No, it’s what they were in when it happened.”

“How peculiar,” Alfred mused as he unbuttoned Jason’s Red Hood onesie, when he paused and chuckled. “He’s even wearing a nappy.”

Bruce and Dick watched as Alfred did his examination, warming the stethoscope with his hands before listening to his heart and letting Dick listen to the beat as well, gently feeling his muscle tone, and as he had told Dick he would, taking a sample of his blood, which Jason chirped at, but didn’t actually cry and Bruce didn’t know if that was good or bad based on Alfred’s expression.

Dick had climbed up on the bed beside Jason and was watching everything with interest. Bruce hesitated, but this was probably going to be the best opportunity that he had to change out of the suit, and he still needed to contact Zatanna about the situation. “I’m going to go get changed and shower, Dick. Will you be fine with Alfred until I get back?” Dick shrugged and Bruce bent down to look at him in the eyes, putting a light touch on his shoulder. “I promise that you will be absolutely safe with Alfred. He looked after me when I was your age.”

“Is Alfred your daddy?” Dick asked, looking back and forth between the two of them. Bruce gazed up at Alfred, who was currently doing an examination of Jason’s ears, but listening to the conversation between himself and Dick. Dick was looking uneasy at the idea of Bruce leaving the room, and his little face was threatening to flood with tears again. He had to express to Dick that he trusted Alfred more than anything in the world in a way that he would understand, so he nodded firmly.

“Yes, and I swear he’ll keep you safe.” Dick sniffed said nothing else, seeming to decide that was good enough for him to agree to stay with Alfred while Bruce changed. Bruce leaned in and mock whispered close to Dick’s ear, but so that Alfred could hear as well, “And I happen to know that he has a jar of lollipops that he gives out after he gives someone a needle. Jason’s too small for his, so he will probably give it to you after he’s finished if you ask him nicely.”

“A red one?” Bruce nodded and Dick copied the action before wiping his eyes with his hand. “Okay. Come back soon?”

“Ten minutes.”

Bruce could do a lot with ten minutes. He went back to the locker room, stripped out of the suit, texted Zatanna, showered, threw on some sweats, downed a protein shake and then followed up with Zatanna that she would stop by tomorrow morning for some breakfast and magical evaluations and possible conjuring if the case needed it, however she confirmed what he already knew that more de-aging usually wore off on it’s own over time.

He walked back to the med bay to find Alfred sitting at a chair beside the bed, holding Jason just in his diaper against his chest and rubbing his back in slow circles, while Dick sat on the bed, swinging his legs over the edge, lollipop sitting in his mouth, chattering away at Alfred about tightrope walkers when Dick saw him and froze.

“You look like you lost a fight with a lioness,” he gasped, and Bruce followed his gaze down to his chest where he hadn’t zipped up his hoodie. He had some fresh cuts that weren’t deep enough to suture but needed bandaging and he was mottled with scars from previous exploits. “Are you okay?”

“I will be. It looks worse than it is. Alfred will look after me.”

“Just like you are looking after us?”

“The very same.”

“You have a dinosaur in your house,” Dick remarked randomly, looking out past the limits of the med bay into the rest of the cave. “Do all houses have dinosaurs?”

It was such a calmly asked but bizarre question and it threw Bruce completely off guard, and by the expression on Alfred’s face, did the same to him which meant a lot because Bruce could count the amount of times that he had seen Alfred truly caught unaware during his lifetime on his fingers. “Have... you never been in a house before?” It was something that Bruce had never really considered, and when Dick had moved in when he was eight he hadn’t mentioned anything remotely like that, so Bruce had to assume that by then he had been in a house at least once, but now that he thought about it, not only had Dick never met any strangers before, his entire upbringing had been either on a train or in a caravan. The child had travelled internationally and had more stamps in his passport than most had in a lifetime but had never lived in a stationary residence.

And now he just accepted that Bruce’s house was an underground cave with a dinosaur in it because he had no other frame of reference.

“No,” said Dick, as if was the most obvious answer in the world. “Can I go look at it?”

“Yes, but be careful? Just to the dinosaur and back. Stay where I can see you.” Dick jumped off the bed and then walked towards the dinosaur a little skip in his step.

Despite Bruce’s words to Dick, he didn’t need Alfred for these injuries and was able to reach to the cabinets for the tape and gauze that he needed and set to work on his own injuries in silence. He looked at Alfred as he bandaged himself up, still holding Jason in his arms and caressing his skin, and was troubled by the pinch in Alfred’s face, the way that his eyebrows were drawn in, ever more slightly than they usually did, unless he was upset about something. “Is he okay?”

“His blood work is still running, but he is as I expected.” Alfred frowned, but leaned down to kiss Jason’s small head. “He is dehydrated and has a slight fever, as well as being underweight for his approximated age and I suspect that he was not full term. He’s quiet, which is unusual, but based on what we know of his personal history and the information we do have, I have reason to suspect that he may be dealing with withdrawal.”

Bruce’s breath caught in his chest. “NAS? Even though that was twenty years ago?” His fingers twitched with desire to track down the ones who had hurt their child, his child, in such a way, who had focused through own wants over the well being of their unborn child like that, but Sheila Hayward and Willis Todd were long past punishable for this particular sin and Bruce was going to have to just swallow this rage down and redirect onto things that he could help the current situation. “Jason doesn’t touch drugs. He barely ever drinks.”

“His de-aged body doesn’t appear to know that,” murmured Alfred. “Has he been fussy?”

“No. Barely a peep.” He stared down at the baby nestled against Alfred. He wasn’t sleeping, and Bruce wasn’t sure that he had slept since the entire incident had occurred. He just laid there, lax against Alfred, simply breathing with his eyes cracked open, too young to even see anything besides blurs.

“Well, that is something at least.” Alfred looked out towards the dinosaur, and smiled as he watched Dick walk around it, running his hands across the surface of it as he wandered between the legs which made Bruce snort. It was something so achingly familiar that Dick had always done and never grew out of, dragging his fingertips across all kinds of surfaces and letting the touch translate his environment around him in a way that only made sense to him. It had taken forever to train it out of him when he was Robin, but it was something he still did when he was Dick, without even noticing he was doing it. “Why don’t you and Master Dick get settled while I feed Master Jason and prepare something for a snack and bring it up to your room?”

“Are you sure?”

“I’d rather try feeding him for the first time without Master Dick around if it is alright with you. I’m not sure if there will be issues and I’d prefer not to frighten the boy further.” The two of them stood and walked out of the med bay and Dick ran towards them as he saw them move. “And he seems rather fond of you.”

The four of them rode up the elevator to the manor, where they then parted ways with Alfred and Jason headed to the kitchen and Bruce leading Dick to the third floor when he noticed that Dick was no longer beside him. He turned and backtracked and found Dick sitting on the stairs, silent tears painting his cheeks, everything that he had been doing is best to hold in having reached a breaking point and bubbling over. Bruce sat down beside him, trying to figure out what to say or ask, but before he had a chance Dick launched himself at Bruce, climbing fully into his arms and wrapping him in a tight hug as he started sobbing a full force.

There was nothing that Bruce could do other than to hug him back, which only made Dick somehow cry harder which he hadn’t thought was possible. He petted Dick’s hair in a way that he remembered Dike liking when he was a child and hoped that it would have the same effect now, and mumbled reassuring nonsense that everything would be alright.

They sat there for a long time, much longer than Dick’s meltdown had lasted, wrapped up in each others arms, Dick’s tiny hand curled into the fabric of Bruce’s shirt and with Bruce wanting more than anything to be able to be the thing that Dick needed him to be right now but knowing that he was a weak substitute at best.

“My mama and papa aren’t coming tonight, are they?” A small voice asked out of the silence, muffled into the fabric on Bruce’s shoulder.

“I’m afraid not. Hopefully they’ll be here tomorrow.” Bruce had no idea what to do if this was going to be a long term thing, what he would say to convince Dick that he hadn’t been kidnapped or separated from his parents by force or any other thing, but he could only focus on the now. “It’s okay if you’re scared. You are in a new place, and you don’t know anyone and you miss them. You’ve been very brave.”

“I’m a Flying Grayson. I’m always brave.”

“Very true.” Bruce stood up slowly, carrying Dick carefully in his arms and still holding the hug tight, while continuing the walk up to the bedroom. “How about you and Jason and I have a sleepover tonight in my room so that none of use have to be alone. We’ll get a big pile of blankets and pillows and snacks and watch any movies you want.”

“I don’t have to go to sleep?” Dick wiped his eyes, whether it be from the tears or a self conscious reaction to talking about sleep.

“Not if you don’t want to.”

“Okay.” He rested his head back against Bruce’s shoulder. “Do you have…” He trailed off into silence, question disappearing.

“Do I have any what, Dick?”

“Stuffed animals?” he whispered hopefully. Of course the child would want a toy for comfort, a familiar face in the middle of chaos even if it wasn’t their own.

And Bruce had something even better.

“I can think of the perfect one for you if you don’t mind that it is used.” He stopped and walked back to the door that they had just passed and adjusted Dick in his arms as he turned the handle and opened the door slowly, flicking on the light. “This is my oldest son’s room. He’s not here right now, but I know that he has some that you can borrow.”

“He won’t mind?” Dick asked carefully, as if he didn’t want to get excited about the idea only to be told that he couldn’t borrow the toy after all.

“Not at all. He’ll be glad that you played with them.” Bruce settled Dick down onto the carpet, and rubbed his back, nudging him forward. “There is one on the bed that I think you might like. It’s his favourite.”

Dick walked up to the bed and let out a giggle. “It’s an elephant!” he whispered, before turning back around to look at Bruce, excitement in his eyes. “I have an elephant like this at home!”

“I thought you might.”

“Are you sure it’s okay? If I use his elephant?”

“Absolutely.” Dick reached for it and hugged his arms around it tight as soon as it was in his grasp, burying his face into the worn fur and Bruce was caught with a sense of deja vu, remembering a slightly older child, but in the same room with the same elephant doing the same motion when he was upset and homesick. “Let’s take it and go to my room and settle in for the night.” He reached a hand out to Dick, and they headed back to Bruce’s room.

They worked to pull blankets and pillows together on Bruce’s big California King bed, building a nest fort hybrid on the mattress until Dick deemed it perfect and snuggled down into the goose down duvet, while Bruce propped himself up against the headboard and stretched his legs out before turning the television on. Dick didn’t know what movie he wanted to watch and Bruce had the suspicion that the Grayson’s may not have had a TV in their trailer so he didn’t have a good idea of what he liked. He was flipping through the options, trying to figure out what movie wouldn’t be potentially triggering for a four year old in Dick’s situation (Tarzan? No. Bambi? Definitely not. Why were all these movies about death and loss? Toy Story? Maybe?) when Alfred tapped a knuckle on the door frame, which startled Dick and had him diving under the covers.

“Master Bruce?”

Alfred entered the room with Jason cradled against him and a picnic basket tucked in the crook of his arm. “There are bottles of formula and snacks for the two of you in there, as well as some other baby supplies that you may need for the evening.” He didn’t say the words exactly, but as he settled the basket onto the bedside table Bruce understood that this was his way of saying that he was going to bed and that it was now Bruce’s turn again.

“Did he eat?”

“Not as much as I would like, but some. He has some issues with suckling but he managed to keep some formula down.” Alfred swayed back and forth, rubbing Jason’s back and looking at the pile of blankets that was Dick before turning back to Bruce. “Skin to skin contact is best for struggling newborns, my boy.”

Bruce stared at him blankly for a few seconds as the words registered and information that he had read on NAS, premature babies and other such illnesses came rushing back. Kangaroo care; skin to skin contact for as long as possible, human touch can help to normalize breathing, heart rate, weight gain, among other things. It was an interesting phenomenon that he had often wondered about but had no way of testing himself. He shrugged off his hoodie, laying it beside him on the bed and reached out for the baby in Alfred’s arms and was reminded again of just how small Jason was as he came to rest on his chest, receiving blanket covering them both.

It was different than before, when there had been a layer of armor between them, now when he could feel the skin on his own, feel Jason’s tiny heart fluttering in his chest, fighting battles so hard from the very start and doing so well.

Bruce was going to do everything in his power to keep this tiny heart safe from harm.

"Do you want for anything, Master Dick?" Alfred asked kindly. Bruce thought for a moment that Dick might says something, but instead shook his head silently and burrowed deeper into the blankets, closer to Bruce's hip, snuggling up against him.

“Thank you, Al.” Alfred nodded and retreated from the room, leaving Bruce, Jason and Dick to along their own devices.

They sat in the quiet for a little while before Bruce started to hear a voice in the general area that Dick was hiding under the blanket. He couldn’t make out the words, but it sounded like Dick was having a conversation with somebody. “Are you alright, Dick?”

A tiny head popped up, closely followed by a stuffed elephant, which Bruce only now realised had been the thing that Dick was talking to. Dick shifted up closer and cuddled close enough that his head was resting on Bruce’s stomach as a pillow, but below the bundle that was Jason. “I miss my family.” He confessed, squeezing the elephant tight. Bruce couldn’t see his face, but he could feel wetness under Dick’s face again. “What if they don’t know where to find me?” he whispered.

“Your family will find you Dick. They’ll always find you.” Bruce reached down and ran his hands through Dick’s hair, just as he had a million times before and would do countless times again, and the boy leaned into the touch. “You’ll never be lost again.”

#whumptober2019 #no.26 #bruce wayne #dick grayson #alfred pennyworth #Jason Todd #de-aging

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deathsprecepts · 7 years ago

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Come one, come all...to a League of Villains Discord!

Have you been searching for a server dedicated wholesomely to the appreciation and love for villains? Or, maybe you’ve just been on a lookout for a server of people who love villains?

Oh for god’s sake, enough with the questions. They’re getting redundant anyway. So, fellow Tumblr user, how would you like to join our Discord server? No? I’m being too forward? Okay, fine, I’ll start over.

League of Villains, you know them, yadda yadda yadda. Bad guys? Possibly, considering that they grouped up on a cliff where any hero could have found them and burned about a half of a forest where our anime protagonists were, all while sacrificing three of their members. It’s quite probable, yes.

But do we love them and would gladly commit any kind of arson, murder, homicide, assault, kidnapping, [shortened for length] for them? You bet your now single big toe we do! Even Moonfish? You might ask. Well, since I am a moderator of the server, I am contractually obligated to tell you yes. But hey, who’s making up the rules here? Me! Moonfish is a lovable, teeth extending son of a gun that I would gladly be cannon fodder for.

So, look past the chaos and the morally questioning ideals that we might (MIGHT) have and join us in our little family today! We don’t make any promises, but if a limb or appendage of yours goes missing, it’s probably being sold from the black market, on the way to some witch doctor practicing in the outskirts of god knows where.

What are you waiting for? The inevitable end of all humanity? How you’re going to speak to your crush? That all can be easily solved by communication, y’know.

Nah, you aren’t waiting for those things. What I do want you to do is to join us and ignore the chloroform slowly seeping into your respiratory system.

Here’s the magic link: https://discord.gg/5txx8nP

Oh, you wanted information about the server? Aw, that’s the boring part. Fine, uh, I guess there’s fan clubs for every villain where you can post art/writing for that particular villain and creative channels where you can post art/writing.

Sheesh, who’s paying me to do this job again? @kamisartblog, was it you? Huh, I don’t recall. Anyway, Kami’s the admin of the server, so hit either of us up if you have a question! We will get back to you as soon as possible, or spontaneously combust when either of us forget to answer your question.

Either way, it’s beneficial.

Disclaimer: We will not address any claims of us doing anything related to the devil or sinning in any way. Oh, what’s that in my mug? Ah, simple!

They’re the tears of antis who I roasted with more force than Dabi’s flames could ever muster.

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robertbryantblog · 6 years ago

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Will Domeinwinkel Back Up

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quickclickhosting · 6 years ago

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Will Domeinwinkel Back Up

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tourguideexpert-blog-blog · 6 years ago

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10 of the best US road trip stopoffs readers travel tips

New Post has been published on https://travelqia.com/must-see/10-of-the-best-us-road-trip-stopoffs-readers-travel-tips-2/

10 of the best US road trip stopoffs readers travel tips

Anyone driving in the US will encounter kitsch diners and gaudy motels, but the roads are also lined with oddball museums and unique amusements New Testament mini-golf anyone?

Winning tip: Freight car motel, Pennsylvania

Visiting Amish Country on our road trip from Philadelphia to Chicago, we stayed in an old caboose (railroad wagon): the Red Caboose Motel in Ronks. The motel consists of a string of old carriages in bucolic countryside. On the farm beside our caboose we watched Amish men in wide-brimmed hats farming with old-fashioned tools; we bought produce from women in bonnets and long dresses, and waved to Amish children peering from buggies. The cabooses vary; larger units cater for families with bunk beds, whereas the smaller baggage car is more basic. Theres a dining car restaurant and even a honeymoon caboose with whirlpool bath. Doubles from $80 room only, redcaboosemotel.com bowbank

Florida island restaurant

Stepping into the Bubble Room on North Captiva island, off Florida, is akin to stepping into every dream of 1950s America. From the vintage toys inside glass tables, to mommas own cooking in the kitchen, youre overcome with the sights and sounds of this playful restaurant with a kitsch Christmas theme. The hardest part will be choosing which room youll eat your dinner in. Dinner mains from $18.95, bubbleroomrestaurant.com Anna Kilcooley

Hooked on barbed wire? Texas

Photograph: Mark Williamson/Getty Images

The Devils Rope and Route 66 Museum in McLean, just off the old Route 66, is housed in a former (underwired?) bra factory. Barbed wire was used extensively in ranching, and many of the 2,000 different patterns of wire, and the tools used to construct the fences, are displayed here. Not grabbing you yet? Theres also a photographic and textual history of the dust bowl (the 1930s period of dust storms caused by drought and poor farming methods) and cattle rearing. You can even buy barbed wire art, including some unique sculpture; and theres a section devoted to Route 66 memorabilia, including the original Big Texan Steak Ranch cow, an old motel sign. barbedwiremuseum.com fionachaillier

Gods golf course, Kentucky

Weve done our fair share of US road trips and often use roadsideamerica.com as inspiration for detours. The Bible mini-golf at the Lexington Ice Center, set in gardens with waterfalls and streams, was worth stopping at for sheer quirkiness alone. You can choose from three different courses, Old Testament, New Testament or Miracles, where youll find holes called Mount Sinai and Jonah and the Whale, for example. We played Miracles … its as underwhelming as you might imagine! lexingtonicecenter.com Chris0000

Classic roadside cafe, Montana

As you head south from the west side of Glacier national park, side-step the main US93 in favour of the scenic MT-35 which hugs the eastern shore of Flathead Lake and takes in cinematic Montana farmlands and landscapes along the way. Echo Lake Cafe in Bigfork is the perfect place to refuel. A classic American roadside cafe with a menu to match (lunch from $9.40), wooden booths, outside seating, excellent bottomless coffee, and impeccable service. Be prepared to queue up alongside the locals; its definitely worth the wait. echolakecafe.com VonBon

Kitsch amusement park, Indiana

Just south of Interstate 64 in Indiana youll find the bewildering, charming town of Santa Claus. Although the town features many Christmas-themed attractions, the main draw is the appropriately named Holiday World amusement park. The place is planned around four holiday-themed sections: Fourth of July, Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas and is as kitschy and wonderful as it sounds. With amazing wooden rollercoasters and a superb water park, Holiday World is a must see if you ever find yourself driving through southern Indiana. Adult $50, children $40, holidayworld.com klo3912

Big Sur literary stopoff, California

Photograph: Alamy

The Henry Miller Memorial Library is on Highway One at Big Sur. It is dedicated to the renowned writer and describes itself as a place where nothing happens. In the winter its a beautiful spot where you can stop off and enjoy the stunning coastal surroundings, browse novels and enjoy free tea and coffee. During the summer it hosts a variety of cultural events from film screenings in the forest, to intimate gigs on a makeshift stage. For a man who said memorials defeated the purpose of a mans life. Only by living your own life to the full can you honour the memory of someone, Miller certainly has the most beautiful one Ive ever been to. henrymiller.org todayherenow

Wild west jailhouse, Arizona

We found this little corner of the wild west while driving through Arizonas Tonto national forest. Founded as a mining camp in 1875, remote Globe in Gila County has remained a real frontier town you can still find a few unique stores and old-time diners. Theres also the notorious Gila County courthouse, now the beautiful Cobre Valley Center for the Arts and the adjacent rather spooky Old Jailhouse. Globes history is laced with murders, hangings, stagecoach robberies, Apache raids, vigilante justice and links to the Clanton brothers of Gunfight at the OK Corral fame. Phineas Clanton married, had a ranch and is buried there. Jailhouse tours from Cobre Valley Center for the Arts Rachel Bloomfield

A desert oasis, Arizona

Rosies Den in 2010. Photograph: Alamy

We first stumbled across Rosies Den on the way to see the Great Wash (the westernmost part of the Grand Canyon). The exterior had a Bates Motel feel to it clapboard shack with fading paint, windows thick with desert dust, a disused pickup truck surrounded by tumbleweeds and a rather sad looking Joshua Tree emerging from a gravel pit. Inside, there were just a few wooden tables, one elderly server and a short counter, so we werent expecting much. Then the menus arrived. Between the four of us we ate steak and mashed potatoes, biscuits and country gravy, pancakes and eggs, a cheeseburger and fries, and lemon meringue, blueberry and coconut cream pie. Rosies has undergone many changes since. The original building burned down, then Rosie passed away, but her son rebuilt, landscaped and refurnished it. He extended the counter, installed a jukebox and hired more staff. New menu items were added and the place now sells cocktails. But Rosies still has a huge amount of nostalgic charm and good, homemade food. Its not just a roadside stop its a destination itself. On Facebook MelRoy

Giant hole, Arizona

Photograph: Tony Rowell/Getty Images

Meteor Crater is an enormous and well-preserved meteor crash site in the middle of the desert. Everything about the build-up to the crater the billboards, the gift shop, the museum is wonderfully kitsch, but seeing the 1.2km-wide crater itself is a surprisingly powerful experience. It is just a six-mile detour off Interstate 40 (which replaced the old Route 66) about 20 miles west of Winslow, and is well-signed – you cant miss it. The flat, dry landscape on this stretch of highway can be a little repetitive so this unique stop-off is certainly the best thing to break up the journey! At $18 entry this is a bargain be sure to walk the crater rim for the full experience. meteorcrater.com sw0001

Read more: http://www.theguardian.com/us

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