#speaking of which i wanna see crowley lose his fucking mind

[love-has-a-way-ofgrowingbackward]

we HAVE to see crowley and aziraphales joint miracle power shatter everything and everyone. I HAVE TO SEE IT. THE POWER OF LOVE ETC. GOD.

[pianostarinwonderland]

Lies down

So I have . Thoughts .

Spoilers under the cut, do not read if you have not read the latest Pomefiore update

Fuck.

I just .

Listen here, from the very beginning of Pomefiore, I knew I was gonna like Vil so fucking much because holy shit, my heart was hurting for him because his situation is so relatable

Not to mention Vil does tick a shit ton of my boxes for my type ahaahhdjsmdn

BUT WOW.

YOU DID NOT HAVE TO GET ME SO HHHH

Please ok, Vil and Azul are very very similar (work hard, upholding an image) but like

Their pre-OB phase is kinda similar????

Both Azul and Vil were stopped from succeeding in what their og villain counterparts were successful in (Azul failed in getting Yuu to fail their side of the deal; Vil failed in getting Neige to drink the poisoned apple juice)........ wait Leona was also stopped too fdjsjksjdksk Riddle is kinda funky, and Jamil actually had short-lived victory

False hope! Azul experienced false hope when Leona was like, “Ok those conditions are tempting... but no.” Vil experienced false hope when Mira Mira said he was the most beautiful thanks to the video staff uploaded of his performance, only for him to be dethroned by Neige again.

Azul: “Ah, that’s right. I could just get my collection back by stealing it from everyone, so I can be the most powerful.”

Vil: “Oh, that’s right. If I make everyone else uglier than me, I can be the most beautiful in the world.”

Tell me they’re NOT similar

Not saying that Vil dethrones Azul because my tunnel vision for Azul is too extreme by now for me to switch, but I wll say that Vil can be my second or third fav

Yes, I really went for Vil-Azul first don’t mind me dkskkdkskdkskkdkdn

Anyway

So it’s just rehearsals but people are like “how tf did Absolutely Beautiful lose to Heigh Ho cover” and I got so confused kdjdjdkkdks but yes, it’s just rehearsals, the actual competition has not started yet

Which means

Okay, Heigh Ho cover was cool and shit but

I do not want to see YA HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO win against Absolute Beautiful like bitch please 🗿🗿🗿

Fnjdkfkkskdkd it sounds like a nursery rhyme I’m sorry, I just wanna cry

And they can’t make me have LSS over Absolutely Beautiful since before the end of 2020 only for it to lose smh also give us money we’re broke poor

Okok moving on

The way they really showed Vil’s internal feelings, like ..... the greying out, the expression, just ??????? DAMN????? Ouch????? Like wow, I felt that, what a fucking mood

MC actually seeing the old hag with the apple??? Like oh God??????? ARE WE FINALLY BECOMING SMARTER?????

Vil giving the apple juice to Neige, I was like “oh shit OH SHIT” the whole time

THEN ROOK CAME IN AND STOPPED VIL OOOH YES THE BETRAYAL

KALIM TOO CAME IN YO I WAS SO SHOCKED AT HOW HE GOT ANGRY???? Like holy shit, the fact he was the one that got the last word in before Vil OB’d and not Rook??? I need tl of what he said now hhhhrhrhrhb

Speaking of Vil’s OB

It’s so pretty omg, like I love the colors and shit

I was wondering wtf they were gonna do to make it pretty while incorporating the peacock theme and they used gold and like wow nice

THE DESIGN BEARS SOME SIMILARITIES TO CROWLEY (particularly the claws) OH GOD

Holy cow, Jamil has good foresight though. Got Neige to perform for everyone so they get distracted before swooping in with magic carpet to save everyone

Like daaaaaamn let’s go

Too bad he was easy to beat 💀 maybe it’s because he was grass/water but like man . Why was he so easy

Ok, something to note is that the beginning of his OB theme has the exact same bells as the theme of the scene with Crowley and the mirror from the prologue. The instrumentation of the whole OB theme is rather similar too.

BUT YO OK, DEUCE’S UM?????? HOLY SHIT

Called Bet the Limit, and like yooooooo

I bet it’s born out of his frustration with Ace because Ace called him idiot then, and he was very frustrated about that (and not to mention others like Vil had called him dumb in his lab story). And so, he set out to prove himself and BAM! Bet the Limit.

VIL’S PAST I SCREAMED

JACK ACTUALLY DEFENDED HIM, I AM SO HAPPY THEY CONFIRMED IT

BLESS JACK GOOD BOY

BUT ALSO VIL BEING TYPECASTED AS A VILLAIN, AND THEN THE FICTION VS REALITY THING I’M

GOD

Poor Vil 🥺🥺🥺 😭😭😭 wtfffff he just wants his happy end (he out here representing the villains theme now KSJDJDJDKDD)

The fact Vil’s first word upon waking up was ‘why’ at Rook, I was just . 😶😶😶

BRUH THEN MALLEUS COMING IN OK I HAVE SOMETHING EMBARRASSING TO ADMIT: I THOUGHT THAT IT WAS VIL’S DAD WHO CAME IN AT THE END BUT IT WAS JUST MALLEUS

EVERYONE GOING TSUNOTAROU???? GOLDEN HFJSJDKSKKDDKK

BUT YES FINALLY, MC KNOWS WHO MALLEUS IS

I THOUGHT WE HAD TO WAIT UNTIL CH7 THANK GOD

Malleus really entered a ruined stadium like 💀💀💀

AND HE JUST REPAIRED THE DAMN PLACE LIKE NOTHING JUST BECAUSE HE WANTS TO WATCH THE SHOW DJSKFKSKDKDKD

Godddddd I can’t wait for the last part hrhrrhhthhhfhfhfh I NEED

All in all, I really love this update, all the food we got, just Y E S AGHHHH THANK YOU TWST

[greenbergsays]

Good afternoon, are y’all ready for feelings again? Let’s talk about the break-up scene.

“But, Des,” you say, “you’ve already talked about the break-up scene!”

Yeah, I talked about the actual break-up, let’s talk about THE BEGINNING OF IT.

This isn’t really what I wanted to talk about, but it’s just another one of those great moments that I love between them.

Crowley, literally two seconds ago, says: “You’re ridiculous, I don’t know why I’m still talking to you,” and walks away.

But as soon as Aziraphale says, “You can’t leave, Crowley!” He turns around and just drops this bomb.

“Enough, I’m leaving.” / “We can go off together!”

Honestly, do the two of you even know how to be properly mad at one another? The answer is no.

But like I said, that wasn’t really what I wanted to talk about. 

What I wanted to talk about is what happens directly after that. I wanna talk about Aziraphale’s reaction.

The way his expression goes slack, lips parting, it’s surprise, yes, but it’s also more. It’s awe.

There are no words, none whatsoever, that do justice to Michael Sheen’s voice in this moment. 

“Go off together?” So soft, filled with disbelief and longing, like in those three words, Crowley has given him everything he’s ever wanted, but never even dared to dream about.

And then there’s this. He takes a little fortifying breath like Crowley’s just knocked the air out of him.

The thing that kills me, though, is that as soon as he realizes that he’s daring to hope, he has to reel himself in again. Because he is Aziraphale and he doesn’t get what he wants.

A little sigh as he lets that same breath go, his shoulders dropping again.

First of all, before I go off on a tangent, I wanna talk about Crowley’s body language.

He’s just said, “let’s go off together,” and he’s standing there with arms wide open like he’s offering up his entire self to Aziraphale, and in some ways he is, but it just kILLS me to see, knowing what’s coming next.

Now onto my tangent:

Listen to yourself, Aziraphale says. It’s a silly thought to entertain; a pipe dream.

This is the moment, the very second, that Aziraphale teeters on the knife’s edge of a life-changing decision. 

Taking what he wants means turning his back on Heaven. Being obedient to Heaven means losing Crowley.

For six thousand years, he’s been able to put off this decision, but he’s been aware more and more that it’s coming, that he’ll have to choose some day. Maybe in those first days, it would’ve been easy for him to choose Heaven.

But six thousand years later, it isn’t. Six thousand years later, the idea of choosing Heaven over Crowley makes him feel like he’s unraveling at his very core.

He needs to be talked into it, though, the same way Crowley talks him into everything else. Needling him, coaxing him, spouting absolute logic at him--because logic is the language that Aziraphale speaks most fluently--until Aziraphale can make his decision and feel good about it.

It’s easy to say that Aziraphale is a worrier and you would not be incorrect in saying so. But let’s call a spade a spade: Aziraphale has anxiety. Seemingly very severe anxiety.

The first time we meet him, he says, “Oh, I do hope I didn’t do the wrong thing,” and then he spends the next six episodes worrying about that very thing. 

That is his defining trait. He needs to do the right thing and his entire life is spent wondering if he’s succeeding.

The thing that Crowley does--that no one else will do, keep in mind! and that I think is absolutely, utterly wonderful--is he talks it through with Aziraphale. He doesn’t just say, “Stop being a worrywart,” or “Why are you worried about this?” or “You worry too much.”

No, he acknowledges and accepts Aziraphale’s anxiety as part of who he is and instead of dismissing or ridiculing it, he helps to ease that anxiety with the thing that works best for Aziraphale: logic.

Crowley gamely engages Aziraphale’s worries and lays out careful arguments to show that no, dove, you aren’t doing the wrong thing. This is the thing to do, I promise, and here’s why.

That way when Aziraphale makes his decision, he won’t worry about it afterward.

I mean, think about Aziraphale after he makes the decision to help thwart the apocalypse & raise Warlock with Crowley. Crowley’s the one voicing his worries in the flashes we see, not Aziraphale. Aziraphale’s fears have been squashed by Crowley and now he Knows he’s doing the right thing, no anxiety present.

So the thing is...he needs Crowley to do it again. He’s giving Crowley the opportunity to ease his fears again.

And Crowley tries to because he knows that’s how this song and dance goes:

He tries.

Aziraphale has spent the past 6,000 years putting boundaries on who and what they are to each other.

Crowley has spent 6,000 years trying to respect those boundaries. He’s ass over teakettle in love with Aziraphale, but he’s spent 6,000 years knowing that he can’t say that because to love one another is to disobey orders.

Something that Crowley is very comfortable with, but which Aziraphale is not.

And, of course, to say that first would be making himself too vulnerable. If he says it first, what if Aziraphale balks? What if it’s not okay to love him?

Of course, this whole conversation between them is a love declaration and Aziraphale does balk. And Crowley, as he walks away with a crumbling heart, is secretly glad that he did not say the words.

So he chooses the word “friend.” His question is calculated, but it’s also a miscalculation.

“How long have we been friends?”

Because I think that “friends” is a bucket of cold water for Aziraphale.

It’s the very moment when he starts to backtrack. It’s when he starts to pull away from Crowley and everything that's being offered. It’s when he starts building up his walls again.

It’s not that Aziraphale doesn’t value what they have--it’s not that what they have isn’t enough--it’s that he is in love with Crowley and he erroneously assumes that he needs more in order to turn his back on Heaven.

He wants the big sweeping gesture, he wants Crowley to say, “I’ve been in love with you for six thousand years, run away with me before the Apocalypse comes.”

Aziraphale has no doubts at all about how he feels about Crowley, but if he’s going to give up Heaven, he needs to know that Crowley doesn’t have any doubts, either. He needs to know that they’re on the same page, that they always have been.

He thinks he needs more of a commitment than “we’re friends, let’s go off together.” (Probably because among his first editions, he has quite a few trashy romance novels. Don’t base romance on that, Aziraphale, ffs.)

And Crowley? Crowley is looking back at the past six thousand years and assuming that the commitment bit was obvious. 

Aziraphale wants a big gesture because he's looking for Crowley's behavior to change, and to change in a way that indicates his feelings. He can’t turn his back on Heaven for things that are unsaid. 

The problem with that, though, is that Crowley's behavior can't change. It can’t because he's been in love since they met. He's ALWAYS acted in love, he can't just start now because Aziraphale’s ready for it.

Aziraphale wants a big sweeping gesture and Crowley thinks that standing there with his arms wide open, offering to run away together, is the gesture.

These dumbasses are so close to getting what they both want, it’s right at their fingertips. They’re on the same page of the same damn book, it’s just different translations.

Now please look at it again, along with what Aziraphale says next:

the thing 

that absolutely kills me

about this fucking part

is that Aziraphale can’t even look at Crowley when he says it.

That very last gif, he manages to glance at him for a second before he has to look away again, but other than that, he has to look away when he rejects what Crowley is offering, while he rejects what he so badly wants to accept

The other thing that kills me--actually there are two other things.

One is the look on his face as he says, “We’re an angel and a demon,” as if he’s having to remind himself of this fact.

They aren’t friends. They can’t be friends. They can’t be more. They are an angel and a demon. There’s no future for them; there can’t be, because this is what they are.

The other thing that kills me is that that line--”We are an angel and a demon.”--is such a meaningless party line and they both know it.

They’re so far past what they are that the fact that Aziraphale has to remind himself of it is telling in and of itself. 

It’s such an arbitrary thing to them at this point that Crowley doesn’t even bother arguing with it. 

The idea that that’s a reason to do or not do anything is just silly, honestly.

[sadddcatastrophe]

I'll Rather Die, Than Live Without You.

NOTE: (Based on season15 episode 3 of supernatural) 

It's been 2 weeks since Cas left after he and Dean fought, Cas missed Dean so much. if only Dean would have listened to what he had to say and understand why he killed Belphegor.

Cas heard his phone rang it's Sam calling, at least he and Sam are still friends he thought, he picks up the phone "Hello Sam" he said "Hey Cas, so I know this is last minute but I could really use your help with a case I'm on" Sam said. "of course I'll help you, just one question will Dean also be on the case?" Cas asked, "no, I thought it'll be better if he isn't" Cas heard that and he felt sad but also glad he doesn't think he can face Dean right now. "okay I'll see you in a few," Cas said before hanging up.

Dean was lying on his bed replaying the fight of him and Cas over and over again, He fucked up he thought, he can't believe he let Cas just walk out like that, he should have listened to what Cas was saying and understand that what he did was for the good, he can't believe he told Cas that "whenever something bad happens its always you Cas. " which is not true he thought, he remembers how many time Cas died for him, fought for him and with him, and how he saved Dean from hell. Dean hates himself so much right now, guess Crowley was right with that, he thought nobody hates him more than he hates himself. He heard sam yell his name "Dean!" that awoke him from going to deep down memory lane. He got up and walked to the Kitchen where sam was sitting.

"Dean!" Sam yelled into the empty bunker in hoping Dean would hear him cause he is too lazy to get up and go to his room to get him. Dean goes into the kitchen where Sam is sitting "yeah?" Dean asked irritably why can't Sam just let him be Dean thought. "I got us a case," Sam said excited "it's in Nebraska, so it's close by I thought we could go check it out," Sam told Dean. "okay what are we dealing with?" Dean asked. "Just the normal stuff, think it might be a vampire nest," Sam told him. "okay let's get our stuff and then I will meet you in five," Dean told Sam, walking back to his room to pack somethings for the trip.

They stopped at the motel they'll be staying at for a few days while working on the case. It's a nice place got two huge beds it's massage beds and Dean loves those! It got a nice shower bath and there is a pie place just around the corner Dean saw it when they came in. Dean was busy taking the bags to the room when. He turned around to get the last things when Cas came into the Room "Hey Sam, I came as fast as I-" but stopped midsentence when he saw Dean. Cas felt his stomach drop it felt like his heart has been ripped out of his chest, he just wanted to run to Dean and hug him and tell him he missed him but he doesn't he just stood there. "Sam! what is this!?" Dean asked Sam looking at Cas with confusion, Sam came inside with some of the stuff when he saw Cas, "well, see since you two have not been speaking to each other I thought why not force you two to speak to each other and sort things out" Sam said rather proud of his accomplishment. "But you told me you needed my help on a case" Cas said with confusion "yeah well I lied" Sam told them " there is no case, I just needed to get you too in the same room again" Sam said "now if you will excuse me I'm going to get us some food and you two" Sam said looking at Dean and Cas. "sort this out" Sam told them before he left.

Cas wasn't about to sort this out he made up his mind, no mate how badly he wants Dean back he is not going to until Dean apologized. he looked at Dean one last time before walking towards the door. It's not that Cas doesn't wanna fix things it's just Dean let him walked out and Dean didn't apologize to him, and Dean didn't even listen to what he had to say for why he killed Belphegor. Cas opens the door when Dean asks "Cas where you going?." "I'm going home, Sam surely doesn't need my help," Cas said sounding frustrated. "oh..." Dean said sounding Dissapionted." well we could always just wait for him to come back and eat some pie," Dean said hoping Cas would stay just a bit longer he knows this is his chance to fix things to get Cas back but he does not know how and where to start. "why!? So we can pretend nothing happened? This isn't a fucking fairytale Dean! I do remember what you told me so stop acting like you don't." Cas yelled at Dean with anger you could hear his voice breaking but Cas tried not to show Dean in how much pain he is, it's not that he is mad he is just in so much pain he didn't mean for it to come out like this. "look Cas" Dean said. But it was too late Cas walked out the door. Cas isn't coming back and Dean couldn't tell him what he wanted too how he wants Cas to come back how he is sorry for what he said and he didn't mean any of it. Now Cas would never speak to him again. And Cas sure as hell won't trust Sam with a case again.

But then Dean thought, fuck this I'm not letting him walk away again he needs to know I care about him and Dean starts running after Cas "Wait, Cas!" Cas turns around really surprised that Dean ran after him this time, so he thought maybe he'll listen to what Dean has to say. "look Cas I am truly fucking sorry that I hurt you. I'm sorry I let you walked out, and I'm sorry I said everything was your fault." Dean told Cas, looking him in the eyes so Cas knew that he was truly sorry. "It wasn't your fault there were so many times when you helped us so Cas I don't blame you. And I'm so sorry I didn't listen to why you killed Belphegor." Dean looked at Cas with pain and sorrow in his eyes. "Cas... I know I pushed you away... But I can't lose you too" Dean told him. "we already lost our mom again and we lost Jack and Rowena, and things just haven't been easy," Dean told Cas with pain in his voice Dean was choking saying the names of the people they lost.

Cas listened to what Dean has to say, he can see Dean is truly sorry. "look, Dean, it not that I don't forgive you. Cause I do I forgive you. But you have to understand since my powers are failing, and what I did with the Levithians I started to realize how worthless I am. I messed up so much. When Naomi used me, so many things are my fault and when you blamed me and told me everything was my fault I realized you had some truth in what you said. " Cas told Dean

Dean felt so bad now he should not have blamed Cas like he did it was wrong of him.

Dean went and hug Cas he holds him so tight the way he held his brother when Sammy was sad that one time. " Cas it's not your fault, okay none of those are please don't blame yourself" Dean whisper to Cas while he hugs him. Cas can't help but feel this longing pain of affection and how much he needed this hug he wanted to cry but he can't all he can say is "I forgive you, Dean," for once Cas felt like this whole weight have been lifted from him now that he knows it's not his fault. He felt happy again.

"you know that pie actually sounds good right now," Cas told Dean. Dean let go of Cas, "Yes let's go get some pie I bet Sammy is back by now." They haven't even realized that it started raining and that they are soaking wet. They walk back into the motel when they saw Sammy standing there looking all proud and happy that he made them patch things up.

They were sitting at the table eating pie and laughing and they felt happy for once maybe knowing Chuck isn't in control of them anymore made them have a bit of peace. They have lost so many people they loved. Jack. Their mom. Rowena. And they do miss them but at the moment they are laughing and have forgotten about all their problems and sadness.

Later that night Sam was sleeping and Cas and Dean where still up laughing and talking on the couch. When they both reach for the last piece of the pie they both stared at each other like they usually do but Cas didn't expect it to actually happen. Dean pressed his lips against Cas, Dean had been wanting to do this so long. Cas was in shock he didn't think Dean felt the same and with the whole fight and everything... But Cas pressed back, they kissed for a while their soft lips touching each other, all their problems just melting away it was just the two of them. Cas felt happy he felt complete he could spend the rest of his life with Dean.

But then the empty came, it told Cas it would come when Cas was happy and it would take him away, Cas just did not think it will happen so fast, Cas was happy now, he never told Dean about his deal Cas thought. "Cas!? Whoa-what is that" Dean yelled while jumping up, getting his gun wanting to fight the black gooey thing that's with them in the room all of a sudden. "it's the empty" Cas told Dean "it's where angels go when they die" Cas said looking at Dean sadly "what do you mean!? You aren't dead" Dean said to Cas "yes but the empty told me it would come and get me when I'm happy... " Cas paused "I made a deal with it to spare Jack's life and take mine instead," Cas said looking away he couldn't bear to make eye contact with Dean. he knows it was breaking Dean. "I love you," Cas said looking at Dean one last time before the empty took him away.

Dean just stood there in shocked of what the hell just happened!? but then he could feel the pain. the anger started rising inside of him. He just got Cas back and now he is gone again. And Dean couldn't do anything to save Cas. "Sam- Sammy!" Dean yelled unable to move or do anything else, he just witnessed the love of his life disappear in front of him.

Sam woke with Dean just standing frozen like he just saw a ghost they have seen a ghost before and Dean never looked like this Sam thought, he realized someone is missing "Where's Cas?" Sam asked Dean with a confused tiring look on his face. That's when Dean broke down crying Sam has never seen his older brother, like this. Sam went and hold Dean while he cried in between Dean crying he told Sam what happened to Cas. " and I.. I could not even save him" Dean said sobbing. "shhh shhh, it's going to be okay" Sam told Dean "we will get him back..." Sam told Dean hoping it will reassure him. but Dean knew they won't Dean just sat there sobbing while his little brother holds him. Dean's whole world was falling apart and all he could do is sit back and watch.

[secretsantasides]

Gift #15: Daydreaming

Gift for  @logic-is-not-missing​

For warnings, we've got a few instances of kissing, some cuddling, some negative thoughts, one panic attack in the middle, and falling asleep together in the same bed.

Logan was a very serious Side. Thomas counted on him for many important functions: organizing, planning, working through issues with any sense of Logic, technical information and vocabulary recall, and prioritizing tasks, just to name a few. He worked tirelessly to ensure that his Host was as well-managed as could be, given that he had other Sides that influenced him. It wasn’t uncommon to have Virgil, his loving, patient boyfriend, massage his head in a darkened bedroom while he dealt with a migraine at least once per week. His job required him to be taken seriously, to not have his input disregarded on the basis of character.

Which is why no one could ever know the secret to his relaxation.

Logan felt his cheek burn and eyes sting with shame whenever he opened the lower cabinet of one of the bookcases in his room. In it, there was a small, unassuming box. However, the plain cardboard box held Logan’s secret. A secret that would certainly make the other Sides, his Host, lose faith in him, which was entirely unacceptable.

He was still glowing from Thomas calling him “cool” after helping his Host learn to live with and manage Remus. To lose that now would be devastating. Only now am I “cool”, only now have I gained their acceptance. Only now have my actions, as diametrical to the others as they are, become palatable. Logan swallowed thickly at the thought of Virgil.

Perhaps now Virgil won’t have to try so hard to be happy with me.

He shook his head, useless emotional thoughts clouding his judgment. I need to clear my mind. I need to rest so my brain can operate at optimal efficiency. Too much depends on me. He pushed his insecurities about his boyfriend to the back of his mind.

You are rationalizing the use of a frivolous activity to delay necessary work.

Falsehood. Daydreaming mimics a meditative state, reduces stress, augments problem-solving abilities, improves memory retention, and promotes the ability to be empathetic.

You do require significant improvement in your empathy. 30 years, and this is the first time the others have considered you cool.

Logan blinked, ignoring the stinging in his eyes. I know. Which is why I must continue this behavior, as well as keep it a secret from them.

It still demonstrates your weakness, your dysfunction as a Side, your inability to be perfect Logic, your failures to-

Cease this!

The voices faded to whispers, cruelly taunting his from the back of his brain, but Logan found it infinitely more tolerable. He snapped his bedroom locked and sound-proofed and opened the box, excited to see what he’d be playing. Ever since he’d given in to his guilty pleasure, he’d used mindscape magic to have to box choose whichever outfit would best fulfill his needs for those minutes he’d allow himself to pretend. He had to stop himself from smiling too widely when he saw that he’d get to play Crowley from Good Omens. He stripped out of his clothes and laid them on his desk so they wouldn’t get wrinkled, then changed into Crowley’s outfit as fast as he dared.

Once he got the cosmetic contact lenses in place, he stepped back and appraised himself in the mirror. The slim black outfit made him undeniably cool and attractive, and he was already holding himself differently. Logan sauntered out of his bathroom, swaying his hips dramatically, hoping he could manage the swagger Crowley possessed. He allowed his mind to slip into that of Crowley’s; the confidence, the largely uncaring attitude, the pure sex appeal. He imagined that he was speaking with Aziraphale on raising the Antichrist.

He walked up next to his bed. “Now Aziraphale,” he began, speaking into an empty space but pretending there was an angel before him “if the world comes to an end, you realize there’d be no more sushi?”

He spent the next hour leaping across his room, walking about and having imaginary conversations and confrontations with various characters, fixing the things he thought could be improved on and fully feeling the emotions of Crowley during his devastation and elation. He closed his eyes and felt a gentle breeze coming off a pond, heard the ducks bickering in the background, smelled the vanilla from a nearby ice cream stand. Most of all, he felt Aziraphale’s presence next to him, adoring gaze upon him. Logan smiled to himself.

Virgil would be quite perturbed if he found out he was Aziraphale and I was Crowley.

He jumped when the timer on his phone went off. He tapped his phone to get the alarm to shut off and pushed away the sadness he felt. Logan had to fight to keep unbuttoning his clothes; his body wanted to keep them on and to keep pretending. He couldn’t deny the feeling of melancholy as he slowly, carefully folded the clothes back in the box and closed it, returning it to the bottom drawer. When he stood back up, he had to squeeze his eyes shut and bite his bottom lip for a few moments to get his emotions under control.

After a few deep breaths, he opened his eyes and focused on his desk, attempting to metaphorically leave his sadness inside the box with his daydreaming outfit. He quickly pulled out his laptop and began working on the budget for the next Sanders Sides episode. Despite the previous episode just being posted, they needed to work on getting the next one into production so the Fanders wouldn’t have to wait too long. Yet another reason I cannot allow my credibility to be damaged. We cannot afford any delays in a Side who’s not Logic attempting to manage my work.

/////

Logan set his empty coffee tumbler on his desk and stretched. He was feeling rather victorious; the new Sanders Asides episode had gone off swimmingly, and the viewers were reacting quite positively to it, including his improvised line:

“Just your cool teacher being cool.”

Thomas and the Sides were beginning to accept that Logan could be tolerable on occasion, and he did not want them to forget that fact. The thought of them going back to not thinking he was cool made his throat close up. He could feel tears gathering in his eyes while his mind’s eye helpfully supplied him the images and sounds of his ideas being laughed at, the twinge in his chest that would happen, the devastation that would follow. He attempted to rein in his thoughts using logic, but to no avail. He whimpered tightly as his vision became spotty.

Oh. Oh dear. This is a panic attack.

Logan laid down on the ground to prevent injuries should he lose consciousness. He gripped the carpet uselessly and struggled to follow the breathing exercises he himself so often helped Virgil through.

He whined as he felt someone rise up in his room. No, they cannot see me like this, I am barely seen as palatable, I can’t bear to lose my credibility as stoic-

“Hey L, have you- Logan holy shit!”

No! Please, not Virgil! Please no!!

“Uh fuck, okay. Hey, it’s okay Logan, you’re safe. Can you hear my voice?”

Logan nodded, shamefully only just noticing how wet his face was from tears.

“It’s okay buddy, you’re having an anxiety attack. Whatever your huge brain is telling you right now, it’s not that bad. I promise, it’s never that bad.” Logan sensed Virgil hesitate next to him. “Is it okay if I touch you right now?”

Logan nodded again, closing his fingers around Virgil’s when he felt them.

“Alright, listen to my voice. Breathe in for one, two, three, four…”

Virgil helped Logan through the breathing exercises. Logan stumbled through the first few, but managed to breathe through the next couple despite his distress. By the time they had reached their twentieth breathing exercise, Logan’s body and mind were feeling calmer. He slowly opened his eyes, illogically not wanting to see Virgil’s face after being so… vulnerable. Virgil’s dark eyes were watching him in concern.

I have caused my boyfriend distress. I need to rectify this immediately.

Logan brought Virgil’s hand to his mouth and kissed it softly. It had the desired effect; Virgil blushed fiercely, his cheekbones and ears turning a gorgeous red.

Virgil cleared his throat. “Uh, feeling better?”

Logan smiled, adoring the deep timbre of his lover’s voice. “I am. Thank you, Virgil,” he said emphatically.

Virgil’s blush turned a deep crimson. “Do you feel like you can sit up?”

“I do.”

Virgil’s hand hovered behind Logan as he drew himself into a sitting position. It left him and Virgil sitting side by side, Virgil itching to act but not knowing what to do. Logan decided to put him out of his misery and kissed his shoulder.

“Shall we retire to bed? I find myself rather drained.”

“Yeah! Yeah, of course! Want any water?”

“Certainly, one mome-”

“Be right back!”

Logan smiled and huffed at his sweet, caring boyfriend. He snapped himself into pyjamas, not wanting to embarrass himself or Virgil. He crawled under the covers just as Virgil returned with the promised glass of water.

“Here you go!” Virgil said, shooting finger guns at Logan and promptly wincing.

Logan quirked an amused brow and sipped the cool liquid. It soothed his parched mouth and throat and helped to further calm him.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” Virgil asked, mumbling.

Logan delicately set the glass on the nightstand. “No, I’d rather not.”

“Your call.”

Virgil watched Logan worriedly and crawled into bed next to Logan. He laid down and gathered Logan into his arms, clutching him against his chest. Logan smiled at the actions of the protective Side.

“I love you Logan.”

“I love you too Virgil.”

With a kiss to the top of his head, Logan drifted off to sleep.

/////

Logan practically ran to the bookcase that held his secret. The next Dark Side had been revealed, and he’d been talked over almost constantly. Thomas had finally gotten the other Sides to hear Logan out, and Logan understood because it was more of a creative endeavor, but the stress of having something to say and not being able to be heard over the din of panic had his blood pressure rise.

He set a timer for a half-hour - he was expected for dinner - and started tugging at his tie while he pulled out his box. He nearly jumped up and down when he saw what was inside.

Grinning in excitement, he quickly got into his Sherlock Holmes outfit. He pushed back the memory of amused judgment from Thomas and the other Sides.

Especially Virgil’s.

Logan adjusted his scarf. He’s apologized, he was only acting defensively because he thought he had to, he thought we hated him, he was in so much pain, he’s already apologized many times…

He shook his head and grabbed the empty pipe from the bottom of the box. He pretended to take a few puffs before smacking his lips.

“Interesting theory Wat-”

His bedroom door slammed open. “LOGAN!! REMUS HAS SHARKS AND- wait what? What’re you doing?”

Logan’s back stiffened and he froze in horror. He felt something in his chest shatter as tears quickly built in his eyes. No no no no no no no…

“L?”

Please GOD no, not Virgil! Please! Please no! Oh god, I can’t, I can’t look at him, he’ll see how pathetic I am, how horrible of a Logic I am, how useless I am. He likes me being serious, he likes my calm, my lack of theatrics. He’s going to break up with me, he now sees what I am, a, a…

A freak.

Logan’s throat spasmed in silent, painful sobs. He bit back a whimper when he heard Virgil walking closer. Please, please don’t look closer. Please spare me a single shred of dignity. Please do not gaze upon me. He’s going to tell everyone, and they’re all going to never listen to me again, Thomas will keep me locked in my room, I’ll lose all their love...

“Uh… what are you doing?”

Logan sniffled loudly. “Nothing of importance,” he said thickly, feeling a curious guilt at calling his daydreaming unimportant.

“Okay… It doesn’t look like nothing, Lo. What’s going on?”

Logan was shaking uncontrollably at this point. “I-I apologize f-for keeping this fr-from you, darling. I love you, s-so much.” His voice broke on the last syllable and he bent over a little, beginning to let out audible sobs.

“Oh! Oh shit, Lo, I love you too! Fuck,” Virgil circled around to Logan’s front and tilted his head up. Logan kept his eyes closed, not wanting to see the derision, the disgust, in his boyfriend’s eyes.

“Logan, it’s okay, I know you like your Sherlock costume. Shit, fuck, uh… do you want a hug?”

Logan let out a particularly painful sob at that. A final hug before we break up. A goodbye hug. “P-please.”

Logan collapsed into Virgil when lithe, warm, hoodie-cushioned arms wrapped around his shoulders. He finally allowed the dam to break, releasing his fear. His back and chest were heaving with grief.

“Shit, oh Logan, god. It’s okay, oh my god, you’re okay. Why didn’t you tell me something was wrong?”

“I-I’m sorry!”

“No, fuck, it’s okay! What’s wrong? Is it something with us?”

“N-no, I love you, b-but I’m-” Logan cried for a few moments before continuing, “I’m going to m-miss it.”

“Wh- are you breaking up with me?” Virgil gasped.

“N-no, but you d-do not want someone like m-m-me.”

Virgil let out a breath. “Fuck, okay, you scared me for a second. Lo, I want someone exactly like you. That’s why we’re dating, right?”

“I- yes, but what about-”

“No Lo. I know you like your Sherlock outfit. Is that what this is about?”

Logan nodded miserably into Virgil’s chest. “You’re always talking about how exhausting Roman can be and how I recharge you and-”

“Lo,” Virgil cut off again. “I panic sometimes, does that make you not love me?”

“Of course not!” Logan exclaimed, finally meeting Virgil’s eyes.

“Then you sometimes dressing up as Sherlock doesn’t bother me. It’s kinda cute actually.”

Logan’s lips quirked at the small blush on Virgil’s face. “But what if,” he sucked in a breath. “What if it’s more than…” he trailed off, too frightened to finish his sentence.

Virgil started rubbing Logan’s back. “I don’t care. I just want you to be happy. Like I said, it’s cute.”

Logan’s breath hitched. “Y-you don’t mind?”

Virgil shook his head, blush firmly in place. “Nah.”

“I d-don’t lose my credibility in y-your eyes? You’re n-not less attracted to me?”

“No, and definitely not.”

Logan searched Virgil’s face before kissing the tip of his nose. His breath with still shaking and his chest was still tight, but he didn’t feel like he was losing everything anymore.

“Irene Adler!”

Logan jumped at the outburst.

Virgil cleared his throat sheepishly. “Sorry. But don’t you need an Irene Adler?”

Logan blinked a few times. “I… I suppose so.”

Virgil snapped, and he was dressed in Victorian lace with elbow-length gloves. Logan raised an eyebrow, as Ms. Adler would not wear something so loud, but smiled appreciatively at Virgil.

Virgil traced his gloved hands over Logan’s sleeves. “Do you want to tell the others?”

Logan considered it for a moment before shaking his head. “Not yet.” I’m scared.

“Okay babe, we don’t have to. How do I look as Irene?”

Logan looked Virgil up and down. “Stunning, my dear.” He waved his hand, and slow jazz music began playing. “Shall we?”

Virgil just smiled and rested his head against Logan’s chest, beginning to dance slowly with him. The strains of the jazz chords washed over them, reaffirming their relationship and their love. They’d go to bed later. For now, they allowed themselves to be lost in the music and in each other.

[mummybear]

Strangers In The Night - Part 3 - He’s My Brother

Part 1    Part 2

Words: 3546

Warnings: Angst, Swearing, Threat Of Non-Con, Demon possession, knives, Threats Of Murder. Think that’s it.

Characters: (OMC) Sebastian, (OFC) Veronica, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester.

Pairing: Dean Winchester x (OFC) Veronica

Veronica awoke with a pounding in her head, she didn’t even want to open her eyes with the pain that was currently radiating through her skull. The sound of a metallic scraping quickly caught her attention even through her pain. It sounded so clearly like a door on hard stone floor, something she could have sworn she’d heard before. The banging of the door as it closed echoed through the room, making her head pound just that much harder. But at least that was a noise that she recognised, even under her current state of being. 

She even managed to hear the heavy footsteps that echoed outside of the room she was in, it sounded like just one person. Said person was pacing continuously outside the door, never straying too far. Whoever it was, walked slow and purposeful with every step as clear as day.

The room that she was in was completely disgusting, the smell alone was enough to make her eyes water. To top it all off she was completely freezing, goosebumps covered her entire body. It almost felt like she might have been in a basement, or it was underground at least, she wasn’t one hundred percent sure. Fighting everything inside her that was telling her to keep her eyes closed, she allowed herself to blink them open slowly. Squinting a few times before she could focus on anything at all around her. 

Even when her eyes finally adjusted to the darkness, there was only a little bit of light filtering into the room, it looked like it was coming from under the door. 

Veronica winced when she tried to move her arms, groaning quietly when she was met with nothing but resistance and more pain. In fact she could feel the blood that had crusted around the cuffs and the cuts on her\ wrists, or whatever the hell it was holding her to the wall. She just about managed to lift her head from her chest, her eyes were only met by the dark stone wall in front of her. 

The room was much smaller than she’d been expecting to begin with, but she was right, it was definitely a basement of some kind, definitely underground. Something else that was completely obvious, was that she wasn’t the first person to be brought here, not if the blood that stained the walls and floor was proof of anything.

The longer she stared helplessly at the wall in front of her, which she was sure was about to become the place she died, the more she began to panic. There was no way in hell she was getting out of here, the room was tiny, nothing but the chains that bound her and the blood stains were in the room. How in hell would Sam and Dean ever find her now, they weren’t close enough to follow the car that had brought her to this place. In fact, aside from knowing there was at least one demon, they had no plan for this, she was alone scared and trapped. 

Sam And Dean 

Sam turned to look at Dean with wide worried eyes, when his brother started shouting Veronica’s name into his phone, that was never a good sign knowing Dean the way he did it took a lot for his brother to break this way. Dean sped off around the corner, turning hard enough to cause a wheel spin, Sam’s hands slammed onto the dashboard instead of his head with the way Dean handbrake turned around the corner. 

Sam turned to look at Dean again, he could practically see the colour drain from his brother’s face in an instant, Dean winced and his jaw clenched hard, even Sam heard the scream that ripped through the speaker of the phone, the thing that he didn’t hear which Dean did was the sickening thud that followed shortly after, or the laughter of someone else, a man or more probably a demon.

“Dammit! Son of a fucking bitch!” Dean fumed angrily, tossing his phone without thinking, pushing the now free hand through his already messy hair. He narrowly missed Sam’s head. But the younger Winchester didn’t take any offence, he knew this was Dean trying to keep his cool. Dean’s fist slammed against the steering wheel as he practically growled out his anger. 

“Dean? What do you want to do?” Sam asked carefully, resting a comforting hand on his brother’s shoulder as he continued to drive. Though he was pretty sure there was no point asking what had happened, since it was fairly evident that whatever it was, it wasn’t good and it involved Veronica.

The cafe that Veronica had mentioned came into view, Dean turned quickly and pulled into the parking lot of Carlie’s cafe, the last place that they knew V had been for sure and she’d been here less than fifteen minutes ago. The elder Winchester spotted her car immediately, he quickly pulled the Impala into the parking space beside it. The brothers climbed out of the car, searching the area for any CCTV, unfortunately, there were no visible cameras. Sam was still in his FBI suit so he headed inside without a word to his brother, heading inside the cafe to ask if they had any just to be sure.

Meanwhile, Dean decided to search Veronica’s car in hopes of finding any clues of where the hell she’d been taken, and by who. Contacting Crowley had even crossed his mind, but that was at best a last ditch option, one he hoped that he wouldn’t need to use.

Resting a hand on the cars hood feeling the dent in the still warm metal, there were a few of the same shape dents littering the cars body work. Almost the shape of a baseball bat. It took a little effort to pry open the door, as it had been forced to close over itself. Dean stumbled back a little when the door finally gave way and swung open. He searched the car for her phone, but came up empty handed that was the first thing that was a positive at least, there were no other clues 

only blood pools in the car. His fist slammed into the roof when he emerged, angry eyes focused solely on the blood splattered across the steering wheel and dash.

If he hadn’t left her, just took her with him, or sent Sam and stayed at home with her, then she’d be okay right now. Cuddled up in his arms in her big bed. This was on him and he had no plans to stop until he found her safe and sound. He should’ve kept her safe was the only thing he kept thinking.

His hands rested on the roof of her car, head hanging low as he tried to think back to the phone call. His brothers hand on his shoulder pulled him from his thoughts though, with a deep sigh he turned to face Sam. “Anything?” Dean asked quickly but his face fell as soon as he looked at Sam. “So no then” he grumbled looking at Sam, he frowned when Sam joined him leaning against her car.

“Oh no, they’ve got CCTV. It’s just-” Sam pauses seeing his brother shift beside him.  Sam swallowed hard running a hand through his hair.

“Spit it out Sammy, what is it?!” Dean demanded impatiently, he sounded angry but Sam could hear the real fear behind his words.

Sam nodded as he scratched at the back of his neck, “She was unconscious when they left, they tossed her into the back of a car, I got the licence plate” Sam tells him before his demeanour changes further, he swallows hard and a small shaky sigh slips past his lips before he allows himself to speak again. “So, the camera had sound Dean, the things they were saying about her man. It made me wanna throw up” Sam told him regretfully, completely aware of how his brother was probably about to act.

Dean’s face changed straight away, his jaw clenched, his brow furrowed and eyes darkened dangerously, and his fists clenched at his sides. “Tell me” Dean practically growled, turning his attention to his brother, Sam watched his brother’s jaw tick and knew that he wasn’t going to take no for an answer.

“They said they were keeping her underground, undetected. Under an old military base the next town over. But Dean, please just trust me you don’t w-” Sam tried but Dean’s fist collided with the side of her car, leaving a slight dent behind.

Dean nodded for a moment before he realised the last part of what Sam had said, his head whipped back around to practically glare at him. “Sammy just tell me, for fucks sake! I need to know what the hell we’re gonna be walking into!” Dean fumed but when he saw Sam’s face he took a breath, trying to push the anger down slightly. “Please” he sighed as they climbed back into the Impala. 

Sam groaned not wanting to repeat the things they had said, “Fine. But don’t say I didn’t warn you” Sam caves as he slides into the passenger side,closing the door behind him before he turns to face his brother. But Dean remains silent, still, waiting for Sam to speak. Sam pulls up the location of the old base on his phone, letting the directions spill from the speaker. Of the base which is supposed to be deserted, of course why would demons care about that. Dean pulls out of the parking space and follows the directions.

“Keep talkin’ Sammy” Dean tells him his tone serious, eyes not moving from the road.

Running a hand through his hair the younger Winchester sighed, “Okay, first off at least four of them. From what I could tell from the footage, pretty sure that all four are demons. The guy I think was the leader, he said something about not telling Crowley, that this was his mission and he didn’t need him involved” Sam revealed watching the frown that crossed Dean’s face.

“So, what some of Crowley’s demons gone rogue. You think that the leader could’ve been V’s brother’s meat suit?” Dean asked curiously, making another turn.

“You think we should call him?” Sam asked his brother, hoping that he would forget the rest.

Dean shrugged before he shook his head with his own sigh, running a hand across the back of his neck. “No. We can’t guarantee that he won’t just kill Veronica and her brother. If there’s any chance he’s still alive, she’d do anything to keep him that way. And I can’t let anything happen to her, I can’t lose her Sammy. Not again” Dean explained, the confession at the end surprised Sam a little but he didn’t let it show on his face.

“Yeah, I get it. Okay, so we keep him as a last resort?” Sam questions, picking up his gun from the floor of the Impala and reloading it. Dean reached behind himself a little awkwardly, tossing Sam his gun as well.

Dean nods thoughtfully, “Yeah, probably for the best. You weren’t done though were you? You heard more right?” Dean inquired hands flexing around his grip on the steering wheel.

Sam nodded, swallowing the lump in his throat. “They said that. They said, they were gonna tie her up, keep her hanging for a few days without food or water, leave her until she was too weak to fight. Anything. That they’d get what they needed, and then she would be useless. Except for bait to get to us, ” Sam finished and that sick feeling was back in his throat and the very pit of his stomach, he couldn’t look at Dean, instead his eyes landed in his lap as he played with his fingers trying not to think too much about what he’d just said.

“Oh yeah. They’re gonna pay!” Dean growled through clenched teeth, his foot pressing down harder on the gas. As he pushed himself up straight in his seat, his eyes hard and his jaw set. 

“We need to be smart about this Dean” Sam sighed heavily finally looking up and over at his brother. 

“I know Sammy. We’ve been through worse. We’ll get her out safely if it’s the last thing I do” Dean replied leaving no room for argument. They turned the next corner and the base became visible, run down and it did look abandoned. Dean drove a little way down the road, parking up on the opposite side of the road from the base. “Let's do this, she’s been gone hours now” Dean said, taking his gun from Sam he tucked it into the back of his jeans, sliding his angel blade into the pocket on the inside of his jacket. 

Sam tucked the demon blade inside his jacket and his gun in the back of his jeans, following Dean as they headed over to the base, Sam lagging slightly behind Dean. They rounded the building tucked up as close to the wall as possible.

Back With Veronica

At this point she wasn’t even sure how long she’d been stuck in here. The room was so quiet now, deathly silent in fact, the footsteps outside the room had been long gone for what she thought was a long while now. Her head was beginning to spin, she was so thirsty, with her arms cuffed together above her head her breathing was starting to become difficult too. 

She fought with the strength that was left in her arms to pull herself up slightly, she gasped as the air entered her lungs, it was an almost painful burn. She wasn’t sure how much more she could take, every now and then a shock would be sent through the cuffs around her wrists. 

The door suddenly clanged open, and the cuffs lowered, allowing for more chain so that her shaky legs could touch the floor. Veronica gratefully breathed in the air, finding that the blurred eyesight began to fade but she was still swaying on her feet. A light flickered on and she winced as the room began to become bright, her eyes were burning as she fought to keep them open. “Well good morning my little Ronnie, nice to see you awake” that voice, she knew that voice, there was only one person who called her that. 

Blinking hard a few times her vision began to clear, finally, she was able to see, not that it made it any better seeing his face. Veronica’s eyes immediately fell to the bullet holes in his chest, “So, you lied typically then. He’s already dead isn’t he?” she asked quietly, trying not to let her defeat or sadness seep into her voice.

She tried to move away from his hand when his fingers brushed over her chin, he tilted her head much gentler than she’d have expected. Veronica tried her best to stop the sob that punched its way from her throat, but that wasn’t possible, as soon as her eyes met his, she thought that her heart had already stopped.

“No. I didn’t lie. He’s very much alive my love, this is an old shirt. Please forgive me” the demon wearing her brother smirked, curling the edges of Sebastian’s lips proving further it wasn’t her brother she was speaking to, it was a look she’d never seen on him before. That paired with the way his eyes moved over her face and body, had her skin crawling more than she’d ever thought possible.

“Bullshit” she spat, scoffing as she pulled her face from his grip.

His hand went over his heart and he gasped in fake hurt, “Baby doll. I would never lie to you, I’m shocked you’d accuse me of such a thing” he winks, as someone leans into the room and passes him a bottle of water.

The demon unscrews the cap and holds it to her mouth, “Fuck you!” she growls, whipping her head away from the bottle and bringing her leg up between his.

He chuckles sickeningly as he shrugs, placing the water carefully on the ground. Before he spins on his heels and is back in her face. “You keep fucking pushing me little girl, then I’ll do just that!” he threatens his lips grazing hers, she pushes herself back into the wall as far as she can.

Then something happens, he seems to trip over his own feet. She can’t explain it but she’s sure it’s him, her real brother hidden beneath the hard surface of this demon. “I’m guessing my brother isn’t a fan of that idea” she asks with a small smirk of her own, but it quickly falls away when he pulls out a knife.

“You’d be right about that. But he knows he can’t fight too hard or he dies. Perhaps my approach to that should change though” he smirks pressing the knife against her throat, he drags it down slowly making its way to the buttons of her shirt, leaving an angry red line in its wake. The tip presses into her skin and she winced, but refuses to show him just how scared she is. “Now, tell me. Has Dean had his way with your tight little body yet?” he asks with what seems like a slight interest. “Perhaps, Sam?” he questions, as the knife begins to move lower popping off every button it comes into contact with.

“They’re gonna fucking rip you apart” she grunts when the knife cuts deeper. 

“So is that a no then? From what I see in your brothers memories it’s more likely to be Dean?” he asks again, she does her best not to react but he can sense the slight raise of her heart rate and pulse every time the elder Winchester is mentioned.

“I’m not telling you shit!” she replies venomously, flinching a little when her shirt falls open, leaving her in a thin t-shirt.

“But princess, you don’t need to. The way your body responds to his name, is unmistakable” he smirks cocky and yet he seems angry still.

“Why? You jealous?” she chuckles darkly, her eyes meeting his again as she reminds herself that this isn’t her brother.

His grin is dangerous this time, seconds later the knife slides through her shirt she shivers as the cold air tugs at her bare skin. “Don’t flatter yourself, i’m fully covered there thanks. As I’m sure Dean is without you” he grits out and she smirks.

“Oh, I don’t doubt it. But that is all my brother, it has nothing to do with you, you sick twisted fuck. My brother, Sam and Dean. They’re twice the men that you’ll ever be” Veronica laughs in his face, she can practically feel the rage flowing off of him, but she can’t stop herself.

“Well we’ll see just how pretty all three of them are when I have my way with them. First I’ll deal with your precious Dean, real slow bleed him dry make you watch while I cut up that pretty face of his. I’ll keep him alive just long enough to watch as I kill his brother, little Sammy will go nice and painful. Then when Dean is eventually dead, I’ll kill you with your brothers hands around your throat. Finally, I’ll leave your brother. Nice and fucked up about what he’s seen what he’s done, until it’s all too much and he has to end it all himself” the demon spits the last words, laughing happily seeing the tears rolling down Veronica’s face. “You my love, don’t stand a fucking chance in hell” he chuckles, slapping her cheek lightly.

Veronica looks down, her heart sinking in her chest as the light blinks off. She’s even colder now than she was before. She can even feel the blood rolling down her stomach, as the cuffs are pulled tight again when the door slams shut behind him. She sucks in a deep breath as the burn in her arms returns again, he’s alive she can’t believe it she’s happy about that, of course she is. 

But she knows her brother, knows that he will find it almost impossible to live with the things she’s sure that he would have been made to do. He was never meant for the hunter life, let alone this shit show he was currently stuck with. 

Everything was beginning to go fuzzy again, all she could think about was when her and Seb had been younger, how he’d always protected her, right up until he wasn’t able to. When that sick fuck of a demon had caught him, he’d tried so hard to keep her safe. She was determined to get him out of here and that thing out of him, but right now she was screwed, he breathing was slowly getting deeper, each breath further apart. There was a loud bang at least that was what she thought she’d heard, who knows maybe she was dreaming.

She was stuck, completely useless to him. She thought she heard her name as she blacked out, but it would only be him again so she didn’t bother to fight the overwhelming darkness as it enveloped her.

Tags: @lusyschwa​​ @chewie-redbird​​ @julzdec​​ @lettersofwrittencollective​​ @stiles-o-dylan24​​ @mogaruke​​ @all-alone-he-turns-to-stone​​ @dylanholyhellobrien​​ @desiree-0816​​ @emichelle​​ @lilulo-12​​ @22sarah08​​ @flamencodiva​​ @hobby27​​ @akshi8278​​

[spac3bar7end3r]

In Which Beelzebub Decided to Take A Break

1295 words / Ineffable Bureaucracy after the Armagheddon

Read on Ao3

“I’m going up,”

Beelzebub, Prince of Hell, Lord of Flies said while spreading on the throne? Chair? Whatever it was, it was uncomfortable as fuck but Hell wasn’t a comfortable place and they didn’t care about it that much anyway.

“Why?” One of the hell goonies asked.

Beelzebub squinted their eyes, “Just because I want to.”

If Crowley could go up there and causing some random shits like that for six thousand years then, of course, they could.

“But what about the matters around here?” Another demon pointed around the damp place. Beelzebub shrugged, “Ask the other princes. I’m tired after that Crowley fiasco. I’m taking vacation leave.”

“And what the hell is that?”

“Dunno. One of heaven’s creations, I think. The one that we countered with Vacation Blue.”

“Ah, That.”

Beelzebub got up then walked out of the room.

* * *

“Why does your fashion look like a 13-year-old human?” Gabriel walked on the beach barefoot, looking like a tourist wearing a Hawaiian shirt and beige shorts.

Beelzebub slightly opened their mouth, tilting their head. “Why are you here? And do you even know what a 13-year-old human looks like?” Beelzebub stretched their legs, challenging the archangel to say something about their outfit. Look at yourself, they wanted to say. Dressing like that.

They didn’t know much about the human world, mind you. It was other demons’ job, not theirs. Their job was just making sure everything went according to the Great Plan, but now? Now, what was their job anyway. Beelzebub couldn’t believe after all this time after the fall, they still had to have another existential crisis.

“Of course, I am always taking measures to see how these human beings have evolved.” Gabriel raised his hands as if to say, see? This is the epitome of the master in human knowledge looks like.

Beelzebub kicked the sand with their boots to Gabriel’s direction. “You still haven’t answered my question. Why are you here?”

“I--” Gabriel opened his mouth to answer but before he could get it out, Beelzebub interrupted, “Wait, I don’t care anyway. Go away.” They got up and walked away.

“Hey, I wasn’t finished--”

“I don’t care.” Beelzebub walked away.

“Fine, but you’re gonna be overheated with that kind of clothing covering the human body of yours!” Gabriel yelled from behind but they decided that they didn’t care. 

A little girl, aged around nine or ten years old, looked up. She was sitting alone, digging the sand with a toy shovel.

“Hi,” She said to Beelzebub, smiling.

Beelzebub decided to sit on the plastic chair not too far from her. When they looked around, they didn’t see the archangel anymore. Beelzebub frowned.

“Are you fighting with your friend?”

“He’s not my friend,” They quickly answered when the girl asked as if it was the answer they always prepared to respond with--but to whom?

“Oh, an enemy then?”

They raised one eyebrow, “No, he’s not my friend nor an enemy, well, not anymore. He’s… nothing.”

“Can someone be a ‘nothing’ to you? Is that a thing?” The girl tilted her head, stopping her hand and throwing the shovel on the sand.

“I don’t know. I’ve never thought about it.” Beelzebub looked at their shoes.

“If he’s nothing then why are you guys yelling at each other. I don’t think yelling is good.” The girl pouted. Maybe she’s thinking of her own family, or friends, Beelzebub thought.

“...It’s not always like this. Well, before the fall” Beelzebub crossed their legs, looking at the kid’s innocent eyes.

  If one of the demons saw them sitting ridiculously on the plastic beach chair, they would either lose respect as the prince of hell or they possibly not care at all. All the demons only cared about themselves (read: Crowley and also, Beelzebub themselves).

“What fall?”

“The fall.” Beelzebub grinned mischievously, asking, “Would you believe if I said I was an angel?”

“I don’t know, would you?” The girl asked back.

“Would I what? Believe if I was an angel? Hah!” Beelzebub shook their head, “I don’t think I would but unfortunately it’s true.”

“But don’t angels suppose to wear all white? You wear black.” The girl pointed at them.

“Because they don’t know we look hot in black,” Beelzebub smirked.

“What’s your name anyway? Where are your… I don’t know, human adults?”

Beelzebub took off their plaid jacket while waiting for an answer. They looked up and cursing at the sun and the almighty, whoever took charge of this goddamn heat.

“This is why I said you should dress as a part of the human world if you want to stay here with that body.” Gabriel appeared behind, holding two cups of soda.

“Where’s mine?” The little girl asked.

“Buy your own,” Gabriel said and throwing himself on the plastic chair next to them.

Beelzebub snapped their fingers then one of the cups in Gabriel's hand had miraculously appeared in the girl’s hand instead.

“Who allows you to sit beside me?” Beelzebub asked grumpily while reaching for the plastic cup in Gabriel’s other hand.

“Um, me?” Gabriel pointed at himself.

Beelzebub shrugged. They decided not to care, and since this is their break, they wouldn’t give a shit anymore. If the archangel wanted to sit beside them, getting all chummy like the good old days then be it.

Gabriel reached for the cup and took it back without asking for Beelzebub’s permission. He drank the beverage then his expression became distorted. (If you dislike consuming human’s weird production then why resist on drinking it, idiot.)

“Don’t you have nothing better to do instead of sitting here with me at an empty beach?” They asked after a 5 minute of trying not to be interested and failed.

“No,” Gabriel answered, kicking the sand with his sandals. He got quiet for a second before looking up, asking, “What would God say if she saw us like this?”

“Congrats?” The girl said while her two little hands building a sandcastle. Gabriel lightly kicked the base to make it falter and laughed a little when the girl shouted hey.

“Like hell she would say that.” Beelzebub shook their head. God probably says nothing at all. They thought.

“She may say that or be angry at us...To be honest, I don’t know. After those Armageddon mishaps, I wonder if what I thought of her is true at all.” Gabriel sighed.

“Well, I’m glad I am not the only one having an existential crisis,” they said.

“Great!” Gabriel clapped his hands. “Then do you wanna take a break together? I came here to ask you this since I figured you would mope around too. We could go anywhere, like the olden days.” Gabriel got up then turned around and offered them a hand.

Beelzebub glanced at the hand nervously for a long time before taking it.

“We could... but do not speak about the past anymore or I will cut your tongue.”

Gabriel nodded, looking at their eyes with the expression they cannot read. Beelzebub stared at the lilac colour that they hadn’t seen this close in a long time.

“Congrats you two. I thought you guys weren’t gonna reconcile or even talk with each other for other millennia.” The girl sighed while dusting off her blue pants and got up.

When Gabriel and Beelzebub heard that they turned back to look at her but the little girl disappeared. Nothing. Even a toy shovel was gone.

The Archangel and the Prince of Hell turned around to look at each other again, mouth slightly opened.

“Well, turns out she really did say congrats after all.” Beelzebub shrugged after being able to compose themselves then grinned, “And archangel Gabriel, you were kicking God’s sandcastle earlier and even deny to give her a soda.”

[not-moose-squad]

Rebound Girl, Pt. 6

Pairing: Jensen Ackles x Reader

Word Count: 1.5k

Summary: You are devastated after you left Jensen and sure that he’s back with Danneel to start their happy family. But suddenly he is in front of your door.

Warnings: I’m so bad at them, tbh, I’m sorry. Mild Angst, language, tell me if I missed anything.

A/N: my entry for @casbabydontgoineedyou‘s 1k follower challenge and I honestly feel very bad because it has actually ended already and I’m still not finished. Hope you can forgive me?!

Catch up here

You were heartbroken, to say the least. You left your cellphone turned off after you came home from driving through Dallas senselessly for hours and even for three days after that. Not once did you visit any social media sites to avoid any pictures of Jensen and Danneel, any baby news. You had turned your answering machine on your phone off when you came home in the afternoon of that day you had left Jensen, not listening to the message that had been left.

The past three days had all followed the same course. You got up, made yourself a coffee and a little something to eat only to get back in your bed to binge watch a show. A few episodes later you would shower and brush your teeth and then you continued watching your shows. You were 12 episodes deep in Designated Survivor when someone knocked on your door. You cocked your eyebrows at Kirkman on the TV and then shrugged, not bothering to open the door. It couldn’t be anyone important and you weren’t expecting anyone anyway.

“YN?” It was Jensen. Fuck. A curse of adrenaline rushed through your body, made your heart beat faster. Not knowing what to do you paused the show on Netflix. A part of you was scared to see him, didn’t want to know why he was in front of your door so you thought that keeping quiet could maybe make him leave. But there was also that part that wanted to jump in his arms, let him tell you that everything was alright and that you needn’t worry about anything and especially not Danneel.

It was that part that made you get up. You tiptoed to the front door carefully so that he wouldn’t hear you move. You stood opposite of the door, with your back against the wall, unsure of what to do next.

“YN? I know you’re in there. Please open the door. I need to talk to you. Please”, he begged.

You knew that you were not strong enough to resist that part of you that wanted to see Jensen. He was also your best friend after all, the person you would have normally run to in a situation like this. But you didn’t want to make it easy for him.

Stepping forward you turned the door knob, taking one last deep breath before opening the door. At least as far as your chain lock would it allow it. You didn’t want to let him in yet.

“What do you want?” You asked staying hid behind the door, your voice hoarse as you hadn’t really spoken for three and a half days.

One of Jensen’s hands reached inside and grabbed yours but not in a creepy way, more in a I am sorry way. “Please open the door. I need to see you.”

You closed your eyes and inhaled deeply. It was all you wanted as well but you weren’t sure if it was the right thing to do. And so you told him.When Jensen spoke again his voice was breaking. “I – I made a mistake, baby. Please, I want to make it right. Let me – let me in.”

You bit your lip, looking up at the wall. You were probably gonna regret that but not letting him in was something you knew you would regret more. You closed the door, unlocked the chain lock and opened the door again. What you saw shocked you. Jensen looked like shit. Under his eyes were dark shadows which were exaggerated by the shadow of a beard. His eyes were red and all in all he was probably in the worst physical condition you had ever seen him.

Just when you were about to say something Jensen crashed his lips to yours. The kiss was full of need, as if your lips were oxygen and he had been without it for way too long. At first you kissed him back but then you realized what you were doing and that it wouldn’t lead you anywhere. The last time you kissed it meant the end of your relationship.

“Stop”, you breathed, breaking the kiss.

Jensen stepped back, he almost looked like a hurt puppy but then apologized. “I just… I need you, YN –“You cut him off by shaking your head. “I don’t wanna do this at my doorstep. Come on in.”

He followed you through to your living room. Slightly embarrassed you quickly threw away some of the Chinese take-out boxes that were lying across the room. Jensen laughed sadly. “Yeah pretty much how I spent my days as well…”

Unsure of what to say to this you sat down. For the first time in your life the silence between you and Jensen was uncomfortable and awkward. He sat down opposite from you, taking your hands in his which you withdrew immediately though. This was too soon. You didn’t want any further physical contact until he said why he was here. And depending on what that was you still wouldn’t want it after hearing him out.

It felt like you could have cut the air with a knife. The tension that was building in the room was unsettling, creeping up on you like a predator on its prey.

“Speak. Please!” You said in a slightly higher note than usual and faster than usual. You wanted this silence to be over.

Jensen sighed. “I talked to Danneel. And against her believe I made it crystal clear that I only want you. Damn it, YN, we barely had 24 hours together. Do you honestly believe I would throw all that away just because she comes in and declares her pregnancy? And I should have told you that right the second she said she was pregnant. I shouldn’t have slept with you...”

You sighed. You didn’t know what you should believe. And that was what you told him, hoped that he would understand. You needed… more. What you needed more of, you didn’t know though.

“Yeah, being a… a dad it’ll change my life – our life, hopefully – but it doesn’t change my feelings for you and it doesn’t mean that we won’t be having children on our own. It’s going to be adventurous and”, Jensen laughed sadly, “Danneel isn’t gonna make it easy for us but I want you to be in on this adventure. Please…”

He looked at you with pleading eyes and it almost reminded you of the situation you had only a few days ago in Vancouver in the restaurant. You wondered why life was constantly making it so hard for Jensen and you.

“Jensen, I – you can’t know that.”“You do realize that all of that sounds like poor excuses? I know this is a lot that is being thrown at us right now but what are you really afraid of?”

“Fucking losing you to Danneel, Jensen!” You yelled, springing to your feet. “A baby isn’t ‘adventurous’, it’s not climbing the Mount Everest. It is a human being you need to take care of, you need to be there for and naturally you wanna be there for its first steps, first word – for everything, Jensen. And you’re gonna be there with Danneel. These are going to be precious moments you will share with her while I’m in Vancouver, alone.”

You sighed and ran your hands through your hair. Still standing, you looked down at him. “I want you more than anyone but I don’t wanna be with you and see you fall in love with Danneel again.”

Jensen looked down at his feet and sighed. You weren’t sure if he was contemplating whether to say something or leave and as he remained silent you walked in your kitchen and got a glass of water.

When you turned around, Jensen stood behind you, leaning against the counter. “You are right. These are moments I wanna experience. But what if I’m on set when it takes its first steps or at a Convention? I’d miss them. Would that be sad? Yes. Could I change it? No. We can’t cross bridges before we even come to them.”

He came closer to you, carefully, as if he was afraid you’d push him away again, and when you didn’t move he put his arms around your waist. “And besides, I told Danneel that you’d be there with me when we came to visit and when it’s older there’ll be Daddy weekends. She’ll be the mother of my child but it doesn’t mean that I want to spend any more time with her than you do.”

His strong arms around you made you feel safe and even though you didn’t want to, you enjoyed his touch. It felt like home. You held onto him tighter when you felt tears welling up in your eyes. Maybe what he said sounded too good to be true but it allowed you to look at this shitty situation from another point of view. One that was filled with hope and a future for you and Jensen.

“Okay”, you whispered and looked up at him, a shy smile on your face. You could see how it took a load of Jensen’s mind and he crashed his lips to yours.

“Thank you”, Jensen murmured against your lips before he kissed you again.

You were sure that tough times were ahead but you knew that somehow the both of you would get through this. Even though Danneel probably didn’t deserve the leap of faith you were giving her.

Read part 7 here

Tag list

Rebound Girl

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