#specifically so I could get the best possible insurance available in my area

[tj-crochets]

hey y'all weird question time again In the US, with insurance, what's a ballpark range for how much you'd expect to pay out of pocket for an MRI?

also hi crafting updates should resume in the next few days I was panicking a little about getting an MRI and that prevented crafting, and then I ended up not even getting it so all the panic was for nothing

[dirtyboysconcrete]

Questions to Ask a Concrete Contractor in 2024

No matter if it's your first experience or second, the estimate process can be challenging and require several appointments before gathering all of the relevant data needed for decision making.

As there are so many concrete replacement contractors available today, finding one suitable can often seem an impossible feat.

Rest assured, though: asking the appropriate questions during an estimate can help ensure a suitable solution for your project.

As such, we have compiled this list of 13 questions you should pose to concrete replacement concrete contractorduring estimates to get an idea of whether they are suitable to your specific needs.

Are You Licensed and Insured? 

Establishing that any contractor hired for an estimate has the necessary licenses and insurance is absolutely key, making this the number one question you must pose when seeking estimates.

A licensed decorative concrete contractor is defined as anyone legally approved to perform the work you need done, while insurance covers them (and you) against expensive accidents that could occur if things go awry.

What is Included in the Total Cost? 

Concrete replacement involves multiple moving parts, not all of which will always be included in the estimate's final total cost figure.

Extra costs incurred due to extra material being hauled away, grading the land before installation, demolition work such as tree or rock removal, proper curing time and sealing are often unexpected costs that surface later.

Make sure to ask what exactly is included in your total costs, as well as potential extra expenses that might surface throughout the replacement process.

How Should I Pay You? 

Deciding when and how you owe payment can be challenging, depending on which contractor is involved in your job. It varies based on what payment terms they specify for their services.

By asking these and related questions, it can help you select a contractor who suits your financial situation best.

How long will the process take? 

Each project entails unique factors, and your concrete contractor should provide an estimate as to when yours can be finished.

They should also give an estimate as to when they can begin the project; this depends on their schedule and availability.

How experienced are you in doing this type of project?

Finding an experienced contractor with your specific replacement application is ideal, since that will provide more benefits in terms of both time and costs savings.

Questions such as, "What experience and examples have they worked on similar past projects do they have?" and "Can they provide any examples that are similar to my project?" can help provide insight into how yours may turn out.

What kind of property damage should I expect during the demolition phase?

Concrete replacement often results in lawns, landscaping and other areas around a property being left devastated or damaged as part of its destruction process.

As part of your replacement project, it is important to ask what damage may occur and if the contractor will fix any damages when their work is complete.

Do You Offer Warranties on Concrete Installations? 

Most reputable concrete contractors will offer warranties to provide peace of mind to customers when selecting them as contractors for their installation projects.

Before committing to any contractor for that specific reason, however, it's essential that you carefully read over their warranty details. Many warranties contain terms which make qualifying them extremely difficult, effectively rendering them non-applicable and therefore rendered null and void.

From where should I obtain concrete?

Different concrete manufacturers produce different quality products, making it possible to end up with an inferior batch that could crumble or disintegrate more readily than desired.

An experienced concrete contractor should have extensive knowledge of the products they typically utilize and can vouch for the quality of their source.

Will You Add Rebar To My Concrete? 

Rebar is an integral component of concrete construction and should be included as needed during different replacement situations.

Experienced contractors should know when rebar is needed and asking about it during an estimate will give you an indication of their expertise.

What is the permitting process like in this area? 

Certain replacement projects will need permits, which could add both time and costs.

Experienced driveway contractor should be well aware of how the permitting process works and can guide you through any additional steps needed for completion of work in your region.

Who Will Manage the Project? 

Trusting someone new with your concrete construction project can be daunting, which is why having one dedicated manager makes all the difference.

Ask about their protocol for managing replacement projects, and make sure that the same person handles everything from start to finish or if this project changes hands frequently along the way.

[oliversmith1]

Why You Need a Workers Compensation Lawyer

Are you a victim of carelessness on the part of your employer? How can you go to deal with your own clinical costs alongside your family's future? In this grave circumstance you and your family needs support, both intellectually and monetarily. During their disability, not everyone is capable of covering their own costs. Will you allow your responsible side to get away with it, even if you have enough money to take care of yourself? If you answered "no," you need to fight for your rights and get your employer to pay workers' compensation. Cases involving workers' compensation can be extremely challenging. It is crucial available a particular legal counselor who can unravel the legitimate bunches and assist you with obtain an effective result.

There are a few questions that many people are unable to answer when it comes to hiring a workers compensation lawyer Boston. The most frequently asked questions and their responses will assist you in understanding your rights:

If my employers refuse to compensate me, what should I do?

Inquire about financial compensation and inform your employers of the incident. Get written medical records from a doctor. A workers' compensation attorney should be consulted as soon as possible if your employers refuse to cover your medical costs or if they delay payment for an extended period of time. Only by doing this can you protect your rights and get enough money for your medical bills.

If I file a lawsuit against my employers, will I be fired?

No, you cannot be fired by your employers for asking for what you deserve. However, once you have completed your disability period, it is in your best interest to look for a new job. Assuming you keep doing likewise work, you might deal with a few issues. Because you have filed a lawsuit against them, your employers won't like you, so it's better to start over.

How can I locate a competent attorney?

You can get recommendations from your neighbors, coworkers, or friends. You can also search the internet online. After finding a lot of names, think about each one separately. Choosing a lawyer who has successfully handled a large number of workers' compensation cases is crucial. Make sure you hire the right attorney by looking at his credentials and reputation.

Therefore, do not allow your employer or insurance provider to deprive you of the benefits you are entitled to. Find a lawyer who will fight for your rights and assist you in obtaining financial support. You can find a lot of lawyers in Iowa City (IA) if you want to file for workers' compensation. However, ensure that the attorney you hire has experience handling cases involving workers' compensation.

Workers' compensation Boston: As a result, this is the best option for you if you're looking for skilled and seasoned lawyers who specialize in workers' compensation. To provide you with high-quality services, Bellotti Law Group, P.C. has lawyers who are highly skilled, knowledgeable, and trained.

What law governs worker's compensation?

On a construction site, a worker might get hurt. This could be because of anything. The worker's inattention or the office staff's or employers' negligence could be to blame for the injury. Workers who suffer injuries as a result of employers' carelessness may be eligible for financial compensation to cover some or all of their losses.

Where are the injured workers?

There are some jobs that are referred to as high-risk jobs. In these positions, high possibilities of the laborers are being harmed. For instance, there is a possibility of physical harm if the worker is required to work in a mine or in high-temperature areas like a furnace. Even death may occur. Workers' families may seek financial compensation from the business in these instances.

Who are lawyers for workers' compensation?

Laws and a lawyer: People who are familiar with the specifics of a state's worker's compensation laws are called worker compensation lawyers. A worker's compensation attorney can be consulted in the event of an injury to a company employee. The regulations vary from state to state. The specialist pay legal advisor knows the standard which is pervasive in the state and can recover the expected measure of cash from the business in the event of injury brought about by manager's carelessness.

A lawyer's assistance and company guidelines: He can also provide you with information regarding worker's injury compensation if you consult your company's worker's guidelines. Even if you are unaware of the differences in compensation between businesses, a lawyer can advise you on how to determine the correct amount. The consultation with the attorney is very important because in some cases, you might only be able to get some of the money back. You can get the full amount of compensation if the personal injury attorney helps you.

Laborers Remuneration is a type of protection that is given by organizations and proposed to workers as a type of clinical consideration pay. Employees who sustain workplace injuries are offered this sum of money. The employee forfeits the right to sue the employer by accepting compensation from the company.

Examples of fraud by employers: There may be instances of fraud by employers. The employer refuses to pay the sum in this instance. If the employer still refuses to pay, the worker compensation lawyer talks to him or her and drags him or her to court. When requesting compensation, the employee's payroll and the position performed are all taken into consideration.

[cazort]

One thing that I don’t hear people talk about enough, when it comes to the experiences of trans people, is the fact that some trans people have body dysphoria but choose not to medically transition because of constraints that, to them, might be worse than their dysphoria.

These constraints could be dislike of or discomfort with the medical system, which can be related to medical trauma, not wanting to deal with the medical gatekeeping (this can be especially hard for GNC trans people living in conservative areas), technological constraints that make it so that the medical treatment cannot actually give us what we most want, lack of insurance and/or other funding, not wanting to go through the experience of and recovery from surgery, not wanting to navigate the problems associated with traveling and/or moving to new regions where the same medical treatments might not be available and/or legal.

I myself have a great deal of emotional trauma associated with the medical system, so just seeing a doctor and getting a prescription for something even once for a short-term thing is difficult for me. It angers me that there are people out there who tell me that if I choose not to medically transition, then I’m not really trans, because these people are downplaying or erasing the trauma that I have experienced through the medical system.

I also have seen other trans people struggle with problems when traveling and living long-term in another country. Sometimes they’ve had to change and/or discontinue treatment, which can be, at best a major inconvenience, and possibly really dangerous. It angers me that there are people out there who would tell a trans person that they’re not really trans because they would choose to delay or not pursue treatment, rather than deal with these types of constraints, constraint which, I might add, in some circumstances might put their safety, health, or even life at risk.

Medical transition is also expensive, especially when surgeries are involved. It angers me when people assume that medical transition is available to everyone, like they assume that people have insurance and/or are able to pay for out-of-pocket costs. Beyond this there is also the assumption of living close enough to providers that can give adequate care, and having the resources to get to that care, which involves both transportation and available time. There are so many different levels of privilege. People without insurance, people without money, people with many responsibilities and little free time, and people with transportation challenges, are only a few examples of the sorts of people left out of the dialogue. I’ve spend many years of my adult life without insurance, and I’ve also spend many years not living in a major city, so I would have to travel quite far to get many of the common treatments, even something as basic as gender-affirming therapy.

We people who choose not to medically transition still need support and acknowledgement. Our choice is valid whether it is forced, or simply a balanced decision in which we are weighing pros and cons. Our choice has no bearing on our identity. We are no less trans because we choose not to medically transition.

We need representation in the dialogue and in depictions of trans people. We are still trans. We often face additional discrimination. We are less likely to have our gender recognized or acknowledged by others. We are often excluded not only from spaces for people of our gender identity, but excluded from trans-specific spaces, by other trans people who do not recognize the validity of our identities and experiences. And, because we do not seek medical transition yet many of us experience just as strong dysphoria, we need additional tools to manage and/or overcome our dysphoria (both body and social) without medical transition.

This is the reality that I live every day. It is not easy and I want it to be acknowledged.

[lambourngb]

re: your tags on that one post abt plotholes in rnm: what are the plotholes that make you lose the most sleep?

(this is my main btw, my rnm blog is @curlyguerin )

Hi! Okay... strap in, because there are a lot of little and big things that wiggle into my thoughts and makes me wonder ...am I the only one who couldn't follow that plotline?

In my opinion RNM suffers more from abandoned narratives and continuity errors than plot holes I guess, since we only have 2 seasons, with at least 2 more to go I guess I can hope they come back to these issues... but: [Under the cut plus some spoilers for season 3]

Things I would like explained :

1. What did Jesse Manes fund with family money in 1x08 ? I'm guessing it was surveillance of the town and the search for more aliens that could have escaped the military in 1947-1948. The idea that Jesse funded Caulfield is just laughable to me, along with how he was able to get his Army-assigned son moved from Germany to New Mexico for 5 years and no one noticed?? Caulfield has to be separate from whatever Jesse was doing in Roswell. Clearly there is still an ACTIVE military project focused on aliens because Flint isn't AWOL, Flint also takes Noah's body to Area 51, so where was Jesse in violation of his orders (Alex's threat to Jesse in 1x08 and then shipping him to Niger)? Surveilling citizens and setting up cameras all over town?

2. Did they ever build an Air Force base on the Fosters Homestead Ranch? (1x01-1x02) ...then it's never mentioned again.

3. I am aware I am the only one who cares about this little bit, but the show seemed to set up a narrative in season 1 about the spotlight Roswell shined white victims of crimes - like Katie and Jasmine, that the town of Roswell holds quite a lot of racism regarding justice- vilifying Rosa for over 10 years, ignoring the deaths of people around Ranchero Night, and then Noah kills Wyatt Long's best friend Hank Gibbons in 1x13. I dunno, I was expecting more from Wyatt in season 2 about this than picking a fight with Michael over Mimi's missing persons sheet and showing up with a crossbow in 2x04. And like, there was a theme of people going missing in season 2!! Mimi, Jenna, the weird twins from 2x06, Charlie -- but yet, no closer scrutiny by Sheriff Valenti other than her focus on Max Evans and the story about Mexico- Like this felt not like a plot hole, but a dropped narrative -- to wrap up the fate of Racist Hank in a missing persons sheet in 2x01. To treat him weirdly like all of Noah's other victims (who were women and men of color and poor), but for a few factors like he was white, he had actual lines in the show over a couple of episodes, and he's one of the few townspeople we learn his first and last name still sticks out in my mind as strange. The Doylist explanation is the actor wasn't available for season 2, but the Watson-perspective of this is just someone the in-show universe doesn't care about ...? Okay. I will keep that in mind, and try to ignore the fact that the town of Roswell swings wildly back to caring about white victims again in 2x13 with Jesse Manes.

4. The Alighting from 1x13 - just how far away was it from happening? Noah was ready to stick a sheriff's deputy, the town event planner and Michael (who probably would be been the only one to go missing without much fanfare, except maybe by Alex) into a pod...for how long? Months? Years? What was his endgame? how did he expect to go unnoticed by the town while he waited for his alien salvation/alien UBER to arrive? Could he just mindwarp everyone into forgetting about the pod squad? Since we didn't see any alien ships show up in the six months from 1x13 to 2x13, and no further follow up by any of our heroes about what Noah was babbling about... I'm going to say this should come back into play for season 3, otherwise it's the most egregious plot hole from season 1.

5. Why did Flint want to work with Helena? Jesse had this master plan that Helena knew all about apparently but she never shares the plan with Flint? Jesse never shares this plan with Flint either? Why? As far as I can tell from the plot of season 2, Jesse takes the console piece from Alex, he was going to kill Alex to keep him out of the way, use the console to blow up civilians, he created a paper trail that pointed the finger at Max, and then when everyone knew the truth about aliens, he was going to use HIS atomizer bomb to release the toxin that Charlie had already developed for Project Shepherd to kill all the aliens.... WHY would Flint want to stop that, especially since they fight in 2x11 over how slow Jesse was moving in his plans? Other than objecting to killing Alex, why would Flint turn Alex over to Helena to blackmail Michael into building a second atomizer bomb? He should have just kept Alex out of the way until it was all over and let Jesse proceed with his plans. Flint's desire to work with Helena Ortecho remains a plot hole to me, that is explained in the most flimsy way of he thinks his dad isn't serious about killing all the aliens even though he has the means? And if he takes Alex from Jesse's control so easily, why not steal the bomb Jesse had too?

6. These are more gripes about continuity, not really plot holes, but the fact we have this loose timeline of events but it doesn't match the weather of filming.... Like Heather Hemmens looked so gorgeous in that little silk outfit in 2x01, but she's wandering outside in Dec in Roswell New Mexico looking like that. I get that it was filmed in August/Sept of 2019 but come on... so my main frustration is I have no idea what season and month is supposed to be on screen. Universe timeline says Winter but filming schedule meant it was early fall with still having the heat of summer there...then the show ends in May/June in the universe, but we all know RNM wrapped in Dec 2019/Jan 2020 so they are all bundled up in winter again.

7. Also on continuity, small things like Rosa's birthday being wrong, the fact her astrological sign isn't Pieces for either date, openly letting Greg Manes see Rosa, not seeming to care that Liz's ex-fiance hears that Rosa is alive - like i'm sure her "dead" sister came up in conversation between Liz/Diego

- the show gives us this beautiful conversation with Michael sharing his background with Alex in 1x10, but then Alex completely forgets it in 2x04 by dropping some line like "this is what you do with family" when Michael expresses confusion about a height chart. Also, on the same note- the jabs about the Library being a dive bar, also felt like a drop in continuity because Alex knows that Michael just lost his mom (1x12) , the government IS studying aliens, and his brother is in a pod, so like, he has some very valid reasons to drink if that's what he wanted to do with in his life in early season 2!! but, also he knows Michael is a genius??

- Why Alex never mentions Rosa, Isobel's blackouts/why Michael gave up UNM, or even hint about what happened with his dad in the shed during his conversation with Maria in 2x05 is also beyond bizarre to me. It was an "information" dump conversation that Alex still doesn't share all the information he has about a situation and just ends up looking kind of judgmental in my opinion.

- the truck conversation in 2x06 between Maria and Alex, why Maria prompts a girl's name when Alex says he's never been in a real relationship INSTEAD of addressing the very real elephant in the room, Michael Guerin, that they had a conversation about in 2x05- also feels like a gap in continuity.

8. Science wise- the pathogen that Charlie developed? It was supposed to be so specific that it could kill a leader of Al Quada and all of their direct descendants but leave the rest of the population unharmed. [Which um, that's a war crime, but whatever!] How was Maria affected? the DNA they had at Caulfield to develop it - like, Maria was descended from Louise and Louise lived free. The only person that pathogen SHOULD have affected was Michael (if they used Nora to base it on) Unless you're telling me that there's some protein in "alien dna" that is so specific to aliens, that no other human shares it, but also so completely undetectable that Kyle couldn't find it in Maria's blood... ? I suppose it's possible. I hope we get more explanation about that in season 3. It makes me wonder why Caulfield/Project Shepherd ever let Patty Harris go after she volunteered for some study then, and remained content to just pay her medical bills through a fake insurance company? [But also didn't flag Mimi and all the doctors that Maria took her to???]

9. Michael's hand. I'm going to reserve judgment about this, because some of my salt on this is based on season 3 promo pictures, but I really thought that moment in 2x13 when he takes off his hat, while Alex is singing, you see him without the wrapping on his hand, that maybe he found some peace with Jesse dead and demolishing the shed with Alex. But then it looks like the hand-danna is all over season 3, right up until the finale of season 3, so... was that a mistake in wardrobe AND not a beautiful moment of character growth??? I wish I could extend some grace to RNM about that, but alas... see above for why I have trust issues.

10. Perhaps I wasn't watching season 1 closely, but I thought Noah's madness was brought on by the fact he was stuck in his pod? That it was "lower class travel accommodations" and Isobel's scream at 13 got his attention? I assumed that he stayed in the pod, possessing Isobel on and off, right up until he used her body to kill Rosa in 2008, absorbing enough power to break out. So how did Noah find Jim Valenti so quickly? If it was through Isobel's memories, then why did Jim not immediately have Noah, some random alien approaching him about his recently dead daughter, hauled off to Caulfield? Jim pays $1,000 for Rosa's body, putting her in a pod [Noah's broken pod??] and stores her, waiting for...something? An alien to come along to bring her back. So did Jim know about The Savior? Why would Jim work with Noah and vice versa? Again, I'm hoping we get more about this in season 3.

11. Was there a point of keeping Alex in the Air Force? He arranges a place for them to work on bringing Max back, but I feel like anyone could have done that? Like Isobel had money, she could have rented a storage facility. All of the equipment was borrowed from the hospital, not the military. The information about 1947-1948 was from the drives decoded from Caulfield or the AAR report left by Flint in the Project Shepherd bunker (which again was decommissioned, not an active military installation). I could support the decision if it had provided some richness to the plot or some conflict within the character, neither of which really happened. Alex hacking the government and going undercover in the Air Force to protect Michael is basically fanon. I love that fanon, but alas...

12. Finally, the time jump. What year are we jumping into? 2020? 2021? Why does it make me think none of those questions above will be answered.

[raleighliving]

Budget Living Raleigh

Living in any city you’re gonna look at higher costs of living.  Rent, utilities, and insurance all add up before you even factor in groceries.  But just because you’re living in the city doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have nice things.

If you find all your money is being eaten by rent, and your bed is supported by the ground itself, then this article is for you; cause we’re going to talk today about bargain hunting in Raleigh and what to look for when you want a good deal on good furniture.  Maybe I’ll do this again for groceries or other such things but for now we’re just focused on general niceties.

Best part of this is it’s gonna be fairly general too.  Anything I mention here you could probably find or do in any American city or small town since the institutions are fairly ubiquitous.  

If you find yourself lacking furniture, decorations, or just general quality of life enhancers my answer boils down to two main points:  Thrifting and Resale stores.  At times they can seem similar enough but there are fine differences that separate the two using fairly recognizable criteria.

“RL,” I hear you say between fistfuls of knockoff Cheetos and self-loathing, “Of course if you want bargains  you go thrifting! Did you JUST hear about Goodwill recently?”  

Yes, in terms of hot takes this is especially dull but what I can lend to the conversation isn’t about how prices at thrift organizations are cheaper than retailers, how you should support your local thrift organizations, or even the general good they provide to low-income communities; what I’m looking at is knowing what you have and what you can expect to find when visiting.  

Take Goodwill, for instance, since everyone has seen at least one in their life. Outside of their larger outlets where you’ll find more furniture, walk into any Raleigh Goodwill and you’ll have seen all of them.  90% of the floorspace is dedicated to cheap clothes with a backwall full of knickknacks and a small bookshelf.  If you’re lucky, there may even be a sofa or two and some paintings along the wall but most of what you’ll find is cheap clothes.

Now, if that’s what you’re looking for that’s great! However, I’ve grown to have a deep distaste for the homogeneity of local GCF stores.  Customers can donate their clothes, toys, and other items to GCF at any store locations; but those items are shipped to processing and then distributed to other GCFs across the country based on inventory need and sales patterns.  What you see in one donation center/store you’ll likely see in every other with maybe the odd rare find if you’re lucky. 

GCF aside your options for Raleigh include org thrifts, mom and pop stores, and discount thrifts to provide some much needed variety in your day-to-day shopping. Each with their pros and cons, yet all sharing the glorious benefit of providing furniture and clothing for a fraction of the price of bigger brand stores.

Org thrifts (short for organization thrift stores, creative I know) are exactly what they sound like.  Thrifts run by an organization or charity, similar to Goodwill's, with a stated goal of helping others and supporting the organization financially over seeking a profit margin. 

Cause 4 Paws, Raleigh/Durham Rescue mission, and Dorcas thrift stores all provide a wide variety of products while using the store proceeds to help the less fortunate; but with phenomenal prices.  It’s not uncommon for a thrift store run by one of these organizations to have fifty cent books, clothing sold by the pound, and furniture/power tools under the $40 price tag if you’re lucky.  Plus, not to sound like a broken record but, your proceeds go towards good causes like animal adoption and feeding the homeless.  

Most thrifts of this nature are run by religious organizations, so if you’re at odds with supporting that sort of thing you might be more interested in the other two options; but otherwise this type of thrift store typically comes with very few downsides. 

|Image Credit:  Dorcas Thrift on Nextdoor

Of course, one of those other options is the standard mom and pop operation.  Not linked to any specific organization or franchise, these tend to be small businesses run by local families serving a smaller radius.  

Prices as a result tend to be a little higher than your average thrift store since it’s, y’know, a business; and the selection can be a little below average, usually consisting largely of estate sale leftovers, but this also works to their favor.

There’s no central distribution center for these businesses, so what people sell/donate to these stores comes from nearby communities typically.  So if you find one near an upper class area like Honeycutt Rd or Ebeneezer Church Rd, they’ll typically have nice furniture, art, and electronics for thrift store prices. 

There’s not too many of these, but my personal favorite is Fabulous Affordable Treasures in Southwest Raleigh.  A decent assortment of clothes and decorative pieces (and a very relaxing general environment) makes it a positive visit even when I’m just browsing. 

|Image credit:  Affordable Treasures Facebook

Finally there’s Discount thrifts.  They’re not too common, and are usually supported by an organization additionally although not all are, but if you find one check back with them regularly because it’s almost guaranteed to be worth it.

These thrift stores operate by having a degrading price scale; setting prices when the object comes into inventory, and then lowering them based on how long its been with them or the condition it was received in.  

Stores like Habitat for Humanity ReStore and Petersons Consigning Design use this, and typically offer discounts upwards of 60% if you wait long enough.  On top of having equally large selections of product from org thrifts, they offer plenty for the savvy shopper. 

The downside is, the best possible price you can receive for any given product is a gamble.  That sweet leather armchair you have your eye on might be dropped from 40% to 50% in the next two days, but if someone finds the price acceptable where it is then that products gone forever (or at least until something similar winds up in inventory).

|Image Credit:  Petersons Consigning Design website

Regardless of which thrift store you choose though, you’re bound to find a bargain in one eventually if you check back every once in awhile.  I’ve only mentioned a fraction of the stores available in Raleigh, if you find a few favorites of your own and check back regularly, you’re bound to find something you’ll love at a price you couldn’t find anywhere else.

Of course, if you’re looking for more niche deals you could always use programs like Facebook Marketplace or Craigslist for people just looking to get rid of their junk.  They’re easy to use and both are incredibly active for the Raleigh area; but if you’re looking for something a little more...interesting then I’d recommend checking out liquidation stores.

There’s not many of them in Raleigh, but recently this past week a store by the name of Treasure Hunt Liquidation opened up with an interesting premise.  They buy tons of returned and opened merchandise from places like Amazon and sell them to other people on a degrading price scale similar to the thrift stores we mentioned above. 

Fridays the price-per-item is $10, and then day by day it drops till it hits $1 per item on the following Wednesdays (and they close Thursdays for inventory).  large bins full of boxed or repackaged goods line the floor with everything from car parts to 3D printing filaments depending on when you can get there. 

Additionally, you can purchase pallets of goods as well; with some of the more high ticket items ranging from $300 up to $1500; but generally containing some of the more desirable items like bikes and kitchen equipment.  

Overall, the whole experience is like a giant rotating lootbox; you’re never quite sure what you’re gonna get when you go but you’re likely to find something that at least catches your eye, even if it doesn’t come home with you.

|Image Credit:  Treasure Hunt Liquidation facebook group

You can’t find everything you’ll ever need at stores like these, but you’ll definitely be able to find affordable furniture and clothes even on a college student’s budget. Even a few dollars saved can make a huge difference though, so if you get the chance or see a store on the side of the road that catches your eye, be sure to at least stop in and see what they have for sale. 

Or, if you’ve read this and have some books/clothes/toys to donate please consider donating or selling them to your local thrift location.  These secondhand finds can make all the difference in the world to a kid who wouldn’t be able to get them otherwise.   Regardless, hopefully at the very least this article kept you entertained, and I hope everyone reading has a great day!

[rebeebit]

So, your parents are getting old.

TL;DR

Stuff: start cleaning out stuff they don’t need now. You might read “The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning” as a guide.

Where to live: research retirement and assisted living options in your parents’ area.

Medical considerations: HIPPA authorization, advanced directives, long term care insurance

Financial considerations: accounts, power of attorney and trusts

Dementia: what to remember when your parents forget.

So, your parents are getting old.

Most of us have parents. Many, if not most, of us will be supporting them somehow as they age. And I read somewhere that most people are not happy with how their parents have prepared for aging (I’d cite it, but I ran across that statistic a couple of months ago and ... you’ll have to take my word for it). I’ve been observing my parents as they age for a while, and in the past two years, my sister and I have become very active in the process of making sure they are safe and cared for. I decided to write a guide to help all of my friends who have parents so maybe you can avoid some of the mistakes my parents made. There are lots of resources out there, so this is by no means exhaustive, but I hope someone finds it useful!

STUFF

This is the easiest way to start, it doesn’t require uncomfortable conversations or lengthy phone calls, but could instead be an opportunity to reminisce and connect with your parents. If your parents have lived in their house for any length of time, they’ve probably amassed some STUFF. My folks lived in their house for 43 years, and they abhorred wastefulness. They also had loads of room for storage - you can imagine how much stuff they accumulated after 43 years! My mistake: I didn’t reclaim items I wanted over the years to the degree that I could have, and had to scramble to get the things I wanted when the time came to move my parents out of their house. So here are some ideas.

Your parents might feel strongly about passing on certain items - find out what these are if you don’t already know. Then you could suggest they give them to you for your birthday or another holiday. This way they get the satisfaction of knowing you have their special belongings while they’re still alive.

Did you leave your stuff at their house when you moved out, and you just never got around to getting it? That’s on YOU! Get it now, or get rid of it, if possible! 

As you’re going through your stuff, you might “accidentally” run across items your parents don’t use anymore. Help them by donating these items or throwing them away.

The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning by Margareta Magnusson is an excellent guide to this process, and a quick read. Read it, and if possible, suggest that your parents read it.

We were able to move our parents’ photo albums, but they had boxes and boxes of unsorted photos and even slides. Encourage them to go through these old memories now and put them in albums - or better yet, digitize them. They won’t have room for all those boxes when they downsize.

If you wind up having to get rid of everything at once, like we did, there will undoubtedly be heartbreak as valued heirlooms get sent to the thrift shop (or the dumpster) and even loss of some income because you won’t have time to drag it to consignment shops. The more you deal with now, the happier everyone will be with the outcome.

WHERE TO LIVE

Aging in place seems like the best option for many people, but it can be quite costly. There’s no deadline by which your parents should move out of their house, and perhaps they never will. This is where you might have a conversation about the future with your parents: what do they envision for themselves, what do they want? This is a great way to phrase it, as it sends the message that you want to know their desires for aging, so you can meet their wishes as best you can. Regardless of what they say, you can do a little homework into options in their geographic area. We didn’t make too many mistakes in this area, but my parents weren’t willing to move in advance of it being a necessity, and then when it WAS necessary in the summer of 2020 … well, who would move their parents into communal living during a pandemic? 

Several friends told me how important it is to move earlier rather than later, as it makes it easier to add levels of care as your parents age. Keep this in mind! Find out what is available, and make sure options for living include assisted living, skilled nursing, AND memory care. The last two are not interchangeable: memory care is very specific for dementia patients. If you have time, take a tour of a few places to get an idea of what life might be like for your parents there.

The move to assisted living was very important for our mother. Our father was hospitalized 15 or more times in the past year, and two of those included multiweek stays in nursing rehab - in fact, he’s still there now, and it’s been over 11 weeks (as of 7.24.21). The time alone in the house was difficult for my mother, and she will benefit from routines, social interaction, and 3 meals a day that she doesn’t have to cook for herself ... among other benefits! Moving was so hard for them to contemplate because they didn’t want to leave their community - which is very understandable - but moving gets much more difficult as your parents age, and in my mom’s case, as her dementia has progressed.

MEDICAL CONSIDERATIONS

Helping your parents navigate the healthcare system is difficult. I won’t claim to be an expert in this at all, but will at least tell you what I’ve encountered.

RIGHT NOW: find out if your parents have long-term care insurance. If one or both of your parents has a lengthy stay in the hospital/nursing home, Medicare will eventually STOP covering them, even if they need skilled nursing or memory care. This will easily start costing $350/day, which is $100,000/year. Long-term care will kick in after 90 days in hospital/nursing/memory care, and will cover most, if not all, of the costs. 

You will eventually need HIPAA authorization with your parents’ doctors. This allows the doctor to talk freely to you about your parents’ health. Without it, the doctor can listen to your concerns, but they cannot share information. My mother was reluctant to give this to us, but when she finally did, we were able to get her evaluated for dementia and take away her car keys. 

If you live close enough to go to doctor appointments with your parents, find a way to do this. When my father returned from one of his earlier but more serious hospitalizations, I requested to join him at his follow-up appointment so I could hear what the doctor had to say and ask my own questions. My father is a reasonable guy and allowed this, and it was really helpful.

Advanced Directives are their medical wishes about resuscitation. It’s a morbid conversation, and you may not want to discuss the details with them, but you should make sure they have their wishes in place.

While you’re on morbid topics, make sure you know their wishes regarding funeral and memorial services and burial arrangements. Some people even want input into their own obituaries. We knew both my parents wanted to be cremated (and where they wanted us to scatter the ashes), but we were surprised to learn my dad did not want any services. Good thing we asked!

FINANCIAL CONSIDERATIONS

For your peace of mind, you will want to know what the state of your parents’ finances is, and you will likely need to manage these finances at some point. Here is what I learned about this realm of the aging process:

Set up autopay for as many bills as you can for them, if they haven’t done so already. As my father’s health situation became more overwhelming, bills got overlooked and they started having to pay late fees. This is an easy step that you can do now and avoid the hassle later.

Suggest your parents simplify things. Do they have multiple credit cards, or multiple bank accounts? Suggest that they consolidate. Again, life gets more complicated with aging, and it becomes harder to manage. Trying to keep track of multiple accounts will be a headache for them, and they could make costly mistakes.

Make sure your parents have designated beneficiaries for all accounts. Apparently the probate process after a person dies is lengthy and annoying, and not something you’ll want to have to deal with on top of your grief when your parents pass away. On active accounts, like checking or savings accounts, try to get your name put on the account. This will help you with managing their finances when the time comes. Banks will literally not talk to you if you are not the account owner or don’t have POA.

Power of Attorney. This document WILL have to be signed, and you will want to discuss with your parents when, not if, they want to do this. The sooner the better. Sign it and scan it, and save it on your phone. This way you can email it to whoever needs it immediately so you can manage all of your parents’ affairs. I needed POA to cancel their phone service, sell their house, sell their car ... you name it.

Finally, if their finances are looking good, read on. Talk to your parents about putting their assets in a trust, especially if you have kids. If you’ve read this far, your parents probably want your kids (and you) to have something of their estate after they’re gone, but they can’t leave anything behind if they haven’t protected their assets. Medical care is expensive, and Medicaid will not kick in until you have only about $1,500 to your name, so protecting assets is important for some people. I don’t know much about this process, but if it is a concern for your parents, encourage them to reach out to their lawyer and financial advisor to take care of this.

DEMENTIA

My mother’s dementia has been the most challenging part for my sister and me over the past several years, but if you think this is in your future, it doesn’t have to be. As a society we’ve gotten better at talking about mental health, and that should also extend to dementia. As with any other health problem, early detection and intervention will lead to better outcomes. In my mother’s case, we attempted to intervene in 2017 but were unsuccessful. My mother was finally diagnosed in January 2021, but at this point she had progressed to mild dementia, and has been unable to process or accept the diagnosis. This has caused her to have worse anxiety because she’s upset about forgetting things, and fewer coping skills because she doesn’t recognize what is wrong with her. While early intervention may not prolong the life of your parent by much, it will lead to better quality of life - which is why you have read this far in the first place, you want your parents to be safe and cared for!

A primary care doctor will do a preliminary screening for dementia, so it is important for this screening to be on your parents’ radar as soon as possible. At this point, it is not automatically done at a certain age; you have to ask for it (which is idiotic, but that’s our health care system, so…). The screening will be important because it will hopefully give you peace of mind that any memory problems are age-related, and not a cause for concern. If not, it will allow the doctor to refer your parent to a specialist and get the appropriate interventions. While there is no cure for Alzheimer’s, there are some drugs that show promise, but also processing and accepting the diagnosis are important for implementing coping skills.

If your parents are diagnosed with dementia, there are loads of resources out there to help. It’s really hard for children to cope with this disease in their parents, as it’s the beginning of the role-reversal where YOU become the parent. Some tips that have resonated with me are that, in dementia, the brain still processes emotions normally, even if memories are starting to erode. So when you inevitably get impatient, frustrated, or even angry with your parent, keep this in mind: they won’t remember why you got angry, they will just remember how you made them feel. Depression and dementia go hand-in-hand because dementia patients get told so often “don’t you remember?” “I already told you that!” and so on. I am by no means perfect in how I handle my mother, but this tip has helped me find patience and calm.

If you’re like me, and you’ve seen both of your grandmothers and your mother decline due to dementia, you have more than a little concern about what the future holds for you. I recommend reading Remember by Lisa Genova (author of Still Alice). The book eased my anxiety about memory lapses I’ve noticed in myself, as lately I regard any lapse as a harbinger of dementia. She also has tips for improving your memory and for preventing Alzheimer’s - which my mother and likely my grandmother had. The number one tip? Sleep.

REACH OUT!!

I was fortunate to have many good friends lend their ears to me while I’ve been in the process with my parents, and several who have been through this and offered their advice and support as well. It was invaluable to have this support system, so I offer that to you. Please reach out if you have questions, want advice, or just want to vent about what you’re going through. If you like, add comments about your own experience below. 

[thelightofthingshopedfor]

just once, just fucking once I would like to have a reasonably productive long weekend instead of spending most of it too stuck in decision paralysis to actually do much of anything until I reach a point where I feel like I could very well break down crying because I’m too overwhelmed with everything I need to do but I still don’t actually do most of it because the decision paralysis is a huge part of what makes me so fucking overwhelmed in the first place

like. right now probably the most urgent thing is a semi-complicated Etsy commission that the buyer would ideally receive by Dec. 10, which probably means sending it Dec. 7 at the absolute latest. so I should be working on that, right? but it’s going to take a while so it’s a time commitment, especially because it seems kind of pointless to get out a lot of messy supplies to only work on it for a few minutes. and I need to order parts for a different order--well, at least that’s quick. I also really need to reapply thermal paste to my CPU as soon as I can because I think the fan’s getting louder and that can’t be good for anything in there, and theoretically it won’t be that hard, but realistically I’m sure it’s going to take a while and I have to look up a little info on how to do it, first--and it involves my PC being out of commission while I’m working on it, so that’s not something I can do halfway. and while my PC’s open I really need to replace my dead hard drive, which wouldn’t be that hard except I want to install the new one alongside the old one so I can try to clone the dead one onto the new one, which will definitely take time on both the hardware and software sides of things, but it needs to happen sooner rather than later because, again, there’s a lot of stuff I can’t do until I get that done. and I need to send the recent invoices for Hazy’s dental appointment to pet insurance to see if they’ll pay anything, and that should be quick, but nothing ever stays simple. and, shit, I should really do some actual work this weekend because I didn’t get enough done before...and I still need to decide what to do about the vision therapy thing now that it’s clear the best they can do for me is a payment plan for like 36 expensive appointments, ugh. and ah shit I signed up for Yuletide and I’ve done almost nothing, and that’s due...Dec. 17? fuck, that reminds me, I gotta go get a new notebook from my room because I just finished this one, I mean that’s quick and easy but it also means I now have two notebooks that mostly aren’t typed up, which is bad because I can’t do anything with the contents until they’re typed up and of course they’re not backed up (unless I put them in my fireproof safe, and then I’d never get them typed), and typing those is going to take forever, and yeah I’ve been meaning to make it easier on myself by just doing like 15 minutes a day but I haven’t done that at all and they really need to get typed--and, well, I could just do a 15-minute stint, sure, but that seems silly when there’s so much that needs to be done--and, ugh, I’ve sorta been ignoring my email for the last three days and I need to go through that because otherwise I’m guaranteed to miss something I won’t want to miss, but that takes time and it’s going to mean opening up more tabs when there are already too many tabs open (there are always too many tabs open) and I need to deal with those too, and a good share of the emails are probably about Black Friday sales that I’ll probably want to do but that means more tabs and more decisions and shit there’s all that stuff in my Etsy cart that I should really buy sooner rather than later because sometimes Etsy stuff disappears or sells out and then I’ll be sad and frustrated with myself and also some of the things I want to buy are for gifts, which reminds me that I have almost no Christmas gifts yet for anybody, and my birthday is soon so I should probably make some kind of list myself but actually why am I focusing on that at all when the Georgia runoff elections that determine Senate control are in barely more than a month and I need to be writing letters/postcards to voters since I don’t want to phonebank and time zones actually make it really impractical anyway? I was going to do that in a reasonable way this time too, just a few letters a day like I meant to before, use up a lot of these stamps and stuff I still have--and ah fuck it’s been a while since I’ve called my own legislators about anything, I need to do that, that’s theoretically quick because voicemails cut me off at two minutes, although to be able to do that I also have to do at least a little research so I know what’s the most important thing to call about and what to say so that’s more tabs and more time, and I still haven’t fucking reposted the tiny little Endgame fix-it fic I wrote at the end of August, let alone finished anything since then

and I would, on some level, like to work on one of the many, many writing projects that is theoretically close to being done, or one of the recent ones I started because I foolishly and incorrectly thought it was something I could bang out quickly

and on some level I would also like to work on more stuff for Etsy that could be pre-made so it’s not another stress point when I get orders, especially because several things are holiday-specific and some wouldn’t even take that long, but I’d still be choosing to do those instead of more urgent things

and none of that even begins to touch other stuff, like my room that continues to be a disaster and I need to sort through my shit so I know whether I can relist my most popular Etsy item (if I even want to, which I don’t right now because stress), not to mention all the stuff I need to clear out by listing on eBay, and I could do at least one part of that (flatten the boxes I’ve saved for shipping) without committing to a week-long project but even that part would take a solid chunk of time that I should be spending on something more urgent

and we can’t even put up the fucking tree until I move some of my shit away from the spot where the tree goes, which is tough because a lot of it is from work or otherwise theoretically temporary stuff that doesn’t have an actual home, so that’s going to take a while, and then putting up the tree is also going to take a while, and my room is already a disaster so I’d need to clean in there to make room, which would take forever, and for that matter my areas of the living room are generally a disaster too, as always

and while I’m thinking about stuff I brought from work, let’s go back to how I need to do some work stuff because I’m lucky enough to have a decent job with good insurance that can be done from home and I’m still just like...kiiiiiiinda endangering that by not being a functional adult in general? which is at least partly because my brain is a dumpster fire that doesn’t seem to be improving (which is something else to worry about) but regardless of the cause I still have to do something about it? oh yes and speaking of the good insurance I’m kinda endangering by being a fuckup, haha sure hope this knot under my jaw doesn’t turn out to be...you know, the type of bad thing that a knot under the jaw could turn out to be! which is another very good reason I need to stop being a fuckup so I’m not maybe endangering the job that would pay for that, along with all my other medical issues! and also the entirety of our rent because my mom’s really high-risk and the only available jobs she’s qualified for aren’t safe for her to do!

and my knee hurts! and my elbow hurts! and my neck fucking hurts, my head and neck always hurt and I think I’ve been sleeping even worse than usual lately, partly because neck pain and partly just my body fucking hates me, it’s always a problem and I don’t know what to do about it anymore

and now it’s after 8:30 pm and obviously I’ve done none of this, and I’m still tired, and my head and neck still hurt, and there are still so many things I need to do but I can’t choose because the time-consuming things are the urgent ones but I don’t have the time or energy for them and choosing a specific thing (an urgent time-consuming thing, or a less urgent but much quicker thing) means actively choosing not to do one of the other things, and it’s all important, and I can’t fucking choose, and I’m pretty much at a point where I can continue running ever more painful and crazy-making circles in my brain trying to make myself decide something or I can say “fuck it” and do something that would be fun but not urgent or important at all, which I shouldn’t do, so for fuck’s sake I should just pick even one productive thing to do and then maybe let myself do something fun and then get to bed at a good time for fucking once but I still can’t fucking choose and I want to either cry, scream, or possibly hurt myself, and none of this is healthy or productive

and I think possibly my therapist is getting impatient with me for not making much progress and not really having specific goals for our sessions aside from “I hate that my brain is Like This and I want it to not be Like This and no I haven’t done most of the things you’ve suggested and no I don’t have a good reason why, I just want the meds to work so everything won’t be so fucking hard and yes I know that wouldn’t be something you could control even if it was in your wheelhouse, which it isn’t, but I get overwhelmed so fast and I know I need to do better and be better but I don’t know how”

and I wrote this instead of actually doing anything, apparently, because there was at least some chance that dumping it all out would make me feel better or help me see more clearly what I actually need to do, but I think I actually made myself feel worse by articulating just how overwhelmed I am, mostly by things that objectively aren’t actually that difficult or important.

and I still can’t fucking choose.

[elwingflight]

Coronavirus: Information & Guidelines

What you can do now, and what to prepare for

There seems to be a lack of what-to-do suggestions on tumblr beyond handwashing, so I thought I’d put something together. I’ve never actually encouraged people to reblog something of mine before, but this might be the time. To be clear: I am not personally a public health expert of any kind. Both my parents are (epidemiology/global health degrees, worked for CDC) and I’ve run this by them. My information is coming from disease researchers on twitter and official public health guidelines online. Sources at the end of the post. This is mostly directed at people in countries where COVID-19 has been reported (I’m in the U.S.), but is not *yet* widespread in the community. Written Mar. 1st 2020, last updated 3/9 (shorter, helpful twitter thread here, helpful NPR article here)

General Info

Firstly, a lot of politicians are *still* trying to sugarcoat things, but it should be clear by now that the new coronavirus is spreading widely and will continue to do so. Because of the incubation period, and in the U.S. at least the delay in testing, the number of cases is almost certainly going to increase rapidly in the near future no matter what we do now. Official government sources are helpful, but its also good to look at what experts on viral epidemics who aren’t directly government-affiliated are saying. Their agenda is purely informing the public in the most constructive way possible, without politics getting in the way.

Two key points- COVID-19 can have a long incubation period (the time from when you catch the virus to when you start showing symptoms) and most people don’t get severe symptoms. Some are entirely asymptomatic, but most people get typical flu-like symptoms. Specifically, the early symptoms to watch out for are a fever and dry cough (meaning, a stuffy nose is probably just a regular cold). Its possible but unlikely to transmit the virus while asymptomatic, most transmission happens when you have heavier symptoms.

The most vulnerable people are the elderly (~ over 60) and those with preexisting health conditions (i.e. cardiovascular disease, respiratory condition, diabetes), or a simultaneous infection with something else (NOT kids in particular!) So far the mortality rate has been about 1-2% (compared to 0.1% for the general winter flu - yes, this really is worse). However, that might be an overestimate, both because people with mild cases aren’t getting tested (the denominator should be bigger), and because the early situation in Wuhan, where a lot of our numbers come from, was especially bad in regards to availability of healthcare.

This is an emotional, difficult situation. Don’t panic. The world didn’t end in 1918, and its not going to end now. But it is very serious, and we need to be thinking about it rationally, not pretending everything is just going to be okay, or uselessly pointing blame. Take care of your mental health, and check in with each other. Epidemics test our generosity and selflessness. Those qualities are needed right now, but don’t neglect yourself either.

What You Can Do Now

There is stuff everyone can do both to prevent yourself from getting infected, and to prepare if you do. ***The big picture to keep in mind is that the biggest risk of epidemics is that they overwhelm our system, especially our healthcare system. What I mean by this is that our society is built to deal with a certain volume of things happening at once- people buying groceries, getting sick, etc. If we suddenly all rush to do something, we overburden these systems and they won’t be there for the people who need them most. Therefore our goal is to slow down the spread of disease, buying time and lowering the overall burden on these systems. This is called “flattening the curve”. It looks like this, and I cannot stress how important this is.***

A very helpful thread on preparedness

Staying Healthy

Like similar viruses (think colds and flu), COVID-19 is mostly transmitted from person to person, usually by close contact but sometimes from an infected surface. More here.

Wash your hands. Everyone has heard this one- 20 seconds, soap all over your hands, wash the soap off. If you can’t wash your hands use an alcohol-based hand sanitizer (at least 60% alcohol). But handwashing is absolutely better. Also- cough into your elbow/shoulder, not your hand, and avoid shaking hands- try elbow bumps or maybe a polite nod instead! If you’re handwashing so much that you’re hands are threatening to crack and bleed though, consider washing more strategically or using hand sanitizer instead.

In combination with hand-washing- stop touching your face, especially while out! This takes practice, everyone does it all the time without thinking. A good practice is to avoid touching your face while out, then wash your hands thoroughly as soon as you get home.

Similarly, avoid touching surfaces as much as possible! Particularly bad are door handles, elevator buttons, that kind of thing. The virus can probably (based on studies of related viruses) last a while on these. Regular gloves can help a bit. Use a tissue then throw it away, use your elbow, etc.

Do Not buy face masks! There’s mixed evidence on whether they’re at all helpful when used by the general public to prevent catching a virus, but actual medical professionals who need them are facing shortages (that’s probably part of why so many healthcare workers got sick in Wuhan), so our buying them up is really bad. The only times you should be wearing them is if you yourself are sick (they do help then!) or if you’re looking after a sick person. Seek instruction in that case in how to use them properly. (Thread on why buying those fancy masks is not good).

If COVID-19 is in your community, try to stay 6 feet from people, which basically means going places as little as possible. See below.

Planning Ahead

Its also a good idea to prepare in case you need to self-quarantine. Self-quarantine is necessary if you’ve potentially been exposed to COVID-19, or if you’re sick but not enough to need to go to the hospital. Follow local guidelines- if there’s lots of transmission in your area, nonessential workers will probably be advised to stay home as much as possible.

If you’re able, get medication now. Don’t go crazy and buy out the drug store, just a reasonable amount. Try to get at least a month’s worth of any prescription medications. This can be hard at least in the U.S. - your doctor may well be able to prescribe more, but insurance companies and drug stores can be terrible. I’ve found trying a different drugstore can sometimes help. Try your best. They may also be reluctant to prescribe more to avoid causing shortages. Idk what the right answer is here.

Don’t go crazy and buy out the store, but start getting a little extra shelf-stable or frozen food. Even some root vegetables that will last a few weeks. You want enough for 2 weeks in case of self-quarantine, but you do NOT want to empty out stores. Panic buying is definitely a stress on the system. Just add a few extra things each time you shop. Don’t forget about pets. You can always eat the food and replenish it over time.

Make a plan with your family/community. If someone gets sick or needs to self-quarantine, is there a corner of the house they can stay in? Who can take care of them? etc. I haven’t focused on plans for schools/religious communities/workplaces etc but those are very important too! This is one place where keeping an eye on local and national news is important. In the U.S., for example, school systems are planning ways to make food available to kids if they’re not going to school.

If COVID-19 is starting to spread in your community, think about how else you can be a good community member. Cancelling nonessential doctor’s appointments, surgeries etc may be very important, for example. If schools are closed, can you help out neighbors with childcare? Do you have a cleaner who may need to be payed in advance if there’s a quarantine?

If You Might Be Sick/Need to Quarantine

See likely symptoms above. Remember, normal colds still exist, and if you go to the doctor for every one of those you will overwhelm the system.

Don’t just go to a hospital! Call ahead to your doctor/clinic/hospital and get instructions on what to do. Getting healthcare workers sick is something we really want to avoid. That said, DO get tested as soon as possible, and act as if you are contagious. The health coverage situation is the U.S. is not yet clear (and ofc its not something the current admin is eager to clarify). Hopefully testing will be covered financially by the government, but I can’t promise that at this time.

In the meantime, stay home and quarantined if you show any symptoms of illness if you possibly, possibly can. This is especially difficult in the U.S. if you don’t have sick leave/childcare, but please. Do your utmost.

Look after yourself. Skype/google hangouts/etc is great for keeping connected. Have some chocolate/chicken broth/other sick foods ready.

The Big Picture

Coronavirus/COVID-19 has not been declared a pandemic yet, but it probably will be before long. This is almost certainly going to get worse before it gets better. We don’t yet know if warmer weather will slow its spread, and a vaccine will probably take about 1-1.5 years to be developed and tested. As I mentioned before, the best thing we can do to keep the world working, minimize mortality, etc is to slow the spread as much as we can, and minimize the strain on the system. Hospitals are going to be overwhelmed. There aren’t infinite unoccupied beds or ventilators, or people to operate them, and supply chains could get disrupted. Thinking about these things is scary, and it will take time to adjust to what’s happening. Start that process now, and help everyone you know reach the point where they’re able to act, not panic. Another reassuring thing- if we slow the spread of COVID-19, in addition to fewer total people getting sick, you will soon have people who are recovered and almost certainly immune. These people will be invaluable as helpers in their communities.

Now that the practical stuff is out of the way, I want to say from a U.S. perspective that yes, our lack of social welfare other countries take for granted is going to hurt us. Lack of access to childcare, no guaranteed paid sick leave, and of course expensive healthcare are massive problems that will make it much harder to limit disease transmission. Help each other in any way you can, and vote for candidates that support implementing these policies! And of course, watch out for propaganda of all kinds, whether its using the virus as an excuse for racism, calls to delay elections, etc. So far my biggest concern is a lack of willingness to admit how serious this is, but we can do this. Lets put extra pressure on politicians to be honest and change policies to actually help people. But, yes, lets also stay united. We need each other now (just, you know, 6 feet apart).

A few sources

In general, the Guardian is a great, free, reliable source of news. In the U.S., NPR (website as well as radio) is another great source. The Washington Post and Seattle Times have made their coronavirus-related coverage open access, not sure about other national newspapers.

twitter thread from World Health Organization (WHO)

U.S. Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) COVID-19 homepage (not being updated in some ways it should be, like total # of tests)

A reality check from some non-Governmental experts (basically, what governments don’t want to say yet, which is that this virus is going to spread, and the goal now is to infect as few people as possible, as slowly as possible. Read this.)

Why you should act now, not when things get bad in your area (we’re always operating on outdated information)

If you want the latest technical info, The Lancet (major medical journal group) has all of their content compiled here, open access.

I can do my best to answer questions (i.e. ask my dad) but those or other reliable, readily find-able sources should have you pretty well covered. Do let me know if anything on here is wrong or needs to be updated! Stay safe, stay positive, we can do this.

[amysubmits]

What areas of life would you say are out of the purview of a Dom? I remember a while back you responded to a post about a Dom telling their sub to vote for a particular political party and you seemed very against that. I would also assume any life-altering decisions (ie. moving, having a child) must be made by both partners, not merely decided by the Dom. Where do you set these boundaries in your relationship and where do you think is a reasonable place for others to set them?

Well, I try to be open-minded about the reality that all submissives are different and all relationships are different. So I think where those lines should be drawn can vary really dramatically depending on the people, the relationship, and other factors. I think if a submissive doesn’t feel assured that if they let go of an area of control, that their needs will still be met, and that the responsibility will be handled well, then that is ‘too far’ for them. But it’s also just possible that something may not be ‘too far’ in an unhealthy way exactly, but may just not be a way that the sub or the couple wants to do D/s. 

I think what you may be trying to get at is, what things are *always* too far? This is just my opinion that is largely based on my own instincts, which I think is all any of us can go on because we don’t have definitive answers on what may or maynot be damaging in D/s. But in my mind, D/s shouldn’t be used to change who someone is, to try to control their addiction or mental health. Those are the two main things that come to mind, I guess.

I think it’s great for D/s couples to support each other's mental health, but not to try to control it or take responsibility for it. I don’t think rules or punishments or rewards should be used to try to require a sub to avoid addictive behaviors or mental health behaviors. I just think it’s messy and potentially dangerous, and is kind of trying to ‘play’ psychologist. I also think it’s bad to see it as your responsibility even. I don’t think it’s good for partners to feel like ‘well they’re having a bad day so it’s my job to figure out how to make them happy’ or whatever it may be. You can’t take responsibility for someone else's wellbeing on that level. Try to support how and when you can, but don’t feel like it’s your job to fix their mood, cure their addiction, correct their mental health issue,etc. 

With identity or not changing who you are...that’s pretty subjective. But I don’t think it’s good to feel like you’re being asked to let go of a piece of what makes you, you. Or I don’t think it’s good if a sub feels like they’re having to become something or someone that just isn’t natural to who they are. In my mind, red flags related to identity and D/s would be things like trying to force a “tomboy” sub to wear dresses, or trying to cut off contact with the subs friends or family, or saying crap like ‘what you want doesn’t matter, you should find all your pleasure in pleasing me.” or “You don’t need to think for yourself.” or “Daddy is always right.” in genuine ways. As roleplay, pretend, dirty talk, that is no big deal. But genuinely thinking that a sub shouldn’t have needs and desires of their own outside of pleasing their dom, genuinely thinking a sub doesn’t need to think for themselves, genuinely thinking that a sub should always pretend their dom is right...those things all suggest to me that the submissives identity is being ignored and I don’t see that as okay. 

The identity reason is why I agreed with that ask about voting. I see voting as a way that we express our moral values and/or our moral priorities. And our personal values are just such a big piece of what makes us who we are. That the idea of a dom trying to tell a sub they have to vote the way the dom wants them to...that just tells me that the dom doesn’t value the submissives values/beliefs. Which to me is quite dehumanizing, really.

I agree with you that big decisions like moving or having children shouldn’t be solely decided by a dom. In my mind that falls into the ‘identity’ category. I think adults need a say in major decisions in their lives for their own mental wellbeing and sense of importance, respect, etc. However, in general, I don’t think that allowing an area of your life to be controlled by your Dom has to *at all* mean that it’s solely his decision. Even in the areas where CD has explicit control, I still get to share my opinion and preferences as much as I want. It’s just that he gets the final say, or like 51% of the vote. Which for me is really important. Even on insignificant issues, if I wasn’t allowed to express my preferences on something, I wouldn’t feel respected in the way I need to feel respected in order to have a loving relationship and to feel like a true partnership. I can feel respected if he hears what I want and tells me no. I can feel respected if I tell him how I think something would be best handled, but he decides to handle it another way. I can’t feel respected if he doesn’t even want to hear my preferences and opinions. That’s not to say that he specifically asks my opinion all the time, particularly on ‘smaller’ issues he might just tell me what he plans to do. But, I always know I can speak up and share my opinion whenever. And for bigger issues he always makes things a conversation and explicitly invites my input. He doesn’t want to decide big things entirely on his own as that wouldn’t feel good to him either. 

As far as where we draw our lines? Well, some of the ‘kinda farther out there’ things that CD gets the final say on would be where we live/move, big financial decisions, health care decisions for our dogs, health insurance decisions, our work/life balance, we practice sexual availability, etc. As far as what's too far for me? None of these are things CD would want to control but...when we have kids, what I eat, how I speak, and I just generally need to not feel micro-managed. For example, I wouldn’t be okay with a D/s style where he gave me a scheduled that mapped out every 30 minutes of my life all day long. I wouldn't be okay with having to ask to go to the bathroom. I wouldn’t be okay with being given ‘busy work’. I wouldn’t be okay with him wanting to do “too much” for me, like in general I wouldn’t want to feel like he was treating me like child. I’m sure there are others. It’s kinda hard to really think about because we’ve never really sat down and created boundaries, we’ve just always kinda naturally felt things out. Most of our D/s is based around domestic stuff and letting him lead our relationship. So if he wanted me to start mopping the floor on Sundays he knows he could just give me that rule pretty much without even asking. But he also knows things that are more emotional or sensitive for me that might be harder for me to let go of, so if he wanted to encourage me to work on something we’d talk about it and he’d ask in a case like that. So overstepping just isn’t an issue we’ve had, even though we don’t have a formal list of what is off-limits. I think we’re also just kinda lucky that our natural inclinations for what we both like him to control are pretty similar. But anyway, most of these things I that I say would be ‘too far’ for me, aren’t about being ‘too far’ for D/s in general they are just things that aren’t right for the type of submissive I am personally. 

[gateelbow71]

The Pensions Consultatory Service

The People's Pension Trustee

Content

Divorce And Pensions.

Pension Sharing (In Some Cases Called Pension Splitting).

Martin Lewis: Functioning From Residence Because Of Coronavirus, Even For A Day? Claim A Year's Worth Of Tax Obligation Relief.

Learn what pension advantages your members would receive if your plan transfers to the PPF. More than 160 personnel with specialist trustees from a varied range of histories. Trustees, employees and funding companies are covered for lawful expenses and also costs incurred in protecting insurance claims brought against them about their tasks to the pension plan. These expenses can consist of referrals to alternative conflict resolution and mediation. Trustees and also staff members engaged in the management of the pension system are covered for losses experienced as an outcome of wrongful acts, such as violation of trust, oversight or misstatement. Keep up to day with pension trustee work by signing up with Pension Careers.

He was greatly involved with the major refinancings in 2004 and 2006 and also handled pension concerns as part of those. He was a fiduciary of the Invensys US pension system while he was Team Treasurer.

Separation And Also Pension Plans.

Since 2007, Will has actually been benefiting the professional body for corporate treasurers, composing and also instructing thoroughly. These include the repayment of benefits, such as lump sum repayments after the fatality of a pension fund participant, kids's pension plans and also ill-health pensions. Before signing up with the board, Anna was a trustee of the Accenture Retirement Savings Strategy. As a digital technique consultant, she is experts in the Web of Points, and has actually also dealt with artificial intelligence and also blockchain projects. She brings this technical know-how to the board, in addition to her passion for great member communications as well as re-engaging plan participants. Long-term companions-- form our solutions to find the ideal equilibrium of assistance for your scheme, till the last pension is secured.

Canada’s largest pension fund bought SolarWinds stake days before hacking disclosure, stock plunge - The Washington Post

Canada’s largest pension fund bought SolarWinds stake days before hacking disclosure, stock plunge.

Posted: Thu, 31 Dec 2020 08:00:00 GMT [source]

We spend for the long-term-- including our innovation to support governance as well as clerical services. Whether you call for an administration or effectiveness testimonial, a recurring governance consultant, or an assistant for your trustee board, we can help you fulfill these increasing demands and also increase value on behalf of your participants.

Pension Sharing (Often Called Pension Splitting).

However, the ability to reimburse pension payments if the participant leaves solution within two years has been modified. Before 6 April 2006, trust-based plans had two significant benefits-- employers could pay even more money right into the plan and members could take a bigger tax-free cash amount than participants in contract-based plans.

Never miss out on a brand-new pension plans trustee task by subscribing to work alerts-- simply enter you email into the box above. The Trustee is legitimately independent of BUGB and all the churches as well as various other companies joining the System. It holds the Scheme's properties in support of members, so that those assets are maintained separate from BUGB and also the other employers, and also by law can just be used to pay Scheme participants' benefits and Plan expenditures. We have actually constantly found them to be specialist, educated and able to suitably challenge professional recommendations. The group are pragmatic and also sensible, bringing a common sense approach and an ability to equate complex issues for fellow trustees to make sure the very best results for recipients. As a Sole Corporate Trustee, we fill in a traditional trustee board, presuming duty and also accountability for all the task accomplished in governing the scheme; a method which is growing in appeal. We have dealt with clients to tackle every possible pension conundrum.

Martin Lewis: Functioning From Residence As A Result Of Coronavirus, Also For A Day? Insurance Claim A Year's Well Worth Of Tax Alleviation.

such as a laptop computer with a camera, which the participants have accessibility to the relevant products prior to initiating the conference. Pension trustees have actually typically relied on normal trustee conferences in the existence of their consultants in order to properly manage their system. The COVID-19 pandemic has actually suggested that in a reasonably short room of time, trustees have had to adjust to a new means of functioning. The Pensions Regulatory authority expects trustees to have a company connection plan. The Regulatory authority's 29 April advice informs trustees to be sharp to threats associated with transfer requests and also provide participants ideal warnings.

Fees for advice are not considered to be administration charges. The key obligation exists with trustees and also managers to be compliant with the regulation. As a system provider, Prudential has a crucial function to play in sustaining trustees to be able to meet their commitments. Adhering to the policies set in April 2018 by the Department for Job as well as Pensions, trustees are needed to make all prices and fees details publicly readily available. This is to permit system members to see if they are getting value for cash as well as to help drive far better end results for them.

Northern Ireland has its very own pensions regulation and referrals in this assistance to the regulation of Great Britain, includes the equivalent regulation of North Ireland. It ought to be kept in mind that some areas of pension plans law-- such as pension civil liberties on divorce and some aspects of trust fund law-- are taken care of differently in Scotland. Where the trustee is a business, you will certainly be a supervisor of that firm. However, you will certainly have the exact same responsibilities as a specific trustee in connection with the plan. If right pensions and divorce Burnley for you are an individual trustee, you will usually be one of a number of trustees responsible for running the system; this group is frequently referred to as a board of trustees.

If you are a trustee, or are thinking about becoming one, you require to understand some standard details about pensions, trustees and also the lawful framework surrounding occupational pension plans. In becoming a trustee of a work-related pension plan, you are choosing to take on an extremely vital role.

Maintaining Notified Of The Company's Strategies.

In summary, on a non-group basis, there is no difference between an agreement based or count on based pension plan and also it is dealt with specifically the exact same for FCA and also FSCS objectives. Additionally, the master count on might establish various other constraints which a typical trust-based system wouldn't have. Maybe that the master count on locations responsibilities on the employer in regard to financial investment option, which wouldn't take place under a contract-based scheme. In a contract-based scheme the employer would certainly assign a pension supplier to run the plan. This develops a contract in between the carrier as well as the employer, and the service provider makes all the choices regarding exactly how the scheme is run. In most circumstances the company will certainly have made a promise to the employee to contribute to the pension system every month, but their responsibility ends there. So the only continuing to be benefit trust-based systems have more than contract-based plans is the reimbursement of contributions.

How do I protect my retirement in a divorce?

Protecting Your Money in a Divorce 1. Hire an experienced divorce attorney. Ideally, this person will emphasize mediation or collaborative divorce over litigation. 2. Open accounts in your name only. 3. Sort out mortgage and rent payments. 4. Be prepared to share retirement accounts.

Participants asking for a transfer worth quote must be sent a letter that the Pensions Regulator, Financial Conduct Authority and also Money and Pensions Solution have produced concerning transfer threats. The Regulatory authority also asks trustees to consist of messages from its different template letter when replying to a transfer request.

If a major injury maintained you or other staff members at your business unemployed for a long term period of time, could your company manage? Individual mishap insurance can supply economic protection for your organization when injuries take place.

Trustees are asked proactively to keep track of the number of ask for transfer quotes they receive as well as which advisors are included. If you recognize uncommon or concerning patterns, you are asked to report these to the FCA at PTL, the leading independent trustee and also governance companies, today introduced its third consecutive year of record-breaking results because the company's MBO in 2017. PTL, the leading independent trustee and administration companies, today revealed the fourth new Customer Director to join its group this year, with the visit of Louisa Harrold. Will joined Invensys in 2000 and operated in the treasury division in the London HQ, first as Replacement Treasurer, after that Group Treasurer.