#spicy baby aloo

[strawberrytalia]

ask game! 🥰💚

top 5 foods? (hard lmao)

top 5 non DC characters?

OOOH LETS GOOOOO

Top 5 foods!

Thai red curry is such a comfort food for me omg. I mean I love Thai food in general (esp shrimp Tom Yum Soup) because it’s like not TOO spicy for my whitewashed Bengali ass, but it’s sooooo good and flavorful

Caprese Salad, or even caprese sandwiches. Summer vibes iykyk, and omg I love basil. Pesto is also my fav condiment (if it counts) so all of that combined is 💯

Aloo samosas! Esp when my grandma makes them homemade. We use flour + water to make the dough, then fill it with spiced potatoes and fry them. Not the healthiest lmao but def my fav cultural food!

Shawarma!!! SUCH a comfort food omg, I have so many good memories tied with it, and also it’s an easy food solution bc it’s always halal lol

Tteokbokki (korean rice cakes)!! I love Korean food, and this is 100x better than ramen I promise 😫 Its SO GOOD

Top 5 non-dc characters!!

1. AANG

HE MEANS EVERYTHING TO ME!!!! 🥺 I love him so so so much!!!! He’s always been my fave in ATLA, he’s so sweet and kind and GOOD, he’s not perfect but he tries his best and he lost everything and he’s been robbed of his loved ones and culture but he doesn’t give up GRAHHHH

2. TOHRU

MY ANGEL. MY DARLING. MY BABY TOHRU. I love her so much!!! I’m not exaggerating when I say Tohru improved my mental health more than therapy ever could. She makes me want to be a better person lol and i know that sounds crazy but fruits basket fans know what I mean 😭🫶 Heartwrenching in the best way possible. She’s so selfless and compassionate.

3. DIANE

UGH Diane is so relatable and real, and she’s probably the fictional character i’m most similar to. I loved her story in the show so much, and I really love how 3-dimensional she feels.

4. Billy Butcher

Okay no more nice characters lmao, we’re going to the opposite of the spectrum. THIS MAN IS SO FUCKED UP 😭😭😭 but he was also my favorite part of The Boys fr. I find him interesting in like a social experiment way lmfao. He’s also so funny in the worst way, and I really love the chaotic element he drives into the show, even if it ends up horribly.

5. Aragorn

I know what you’re thinking, Zaina why are there two white men in your top 5 😭 I was trying to think of a good mix of media or else it would be all anime. Anyways…I love pr much everybody in LoTR, but he’s special to me and he always has been.

[kurapikaschai]

okay 1: bengali mashed potatoes? would you like to share a recipe? I love mashed potatoes 2: 16, 22, & 25 :)

1: This is a good recipe for aloo bhorta! the key tbh is to mash the potato(es) with your hands after boiling it so it's still a bit chunky. and if the recipe I linked is too spicy / you don't want to have chilli in your mashed potatoes what I do sometimes is just mix in salt, mustard seed oil, cilantro and sometimes onion. I hope you get to make it it's really good :p

2: thank you for the ask !! (⁠✿⁠^⁠‿⁠^⁠)

16. thoughts on mint chocolate chip?

hit or miss sometimes 🤔 I have to be in the mood for it but overall p good

22. do you have an emotional support water bottle?

I DO it's a stainless steel nike water bottle I got for free w so many other free things including air force 1s :0 anyways this water bottle>> I don't have any stickers on it but I like holding it... it's my baby

25. would you say you have good taste in music?

yes ! I would link a playlist however now I just listen to my liked songs on shuffle 😭 here r some fave songs btw

[vanitasmagickitchen]

Aloo Masala Fry | Jodhpuri Masala Aloo- No Onion No Garlic आज में आप के लिए जोधपुरी आलू की रेसिपी लेकर आयी हूँ ,बनाने में बहुत आसान है बोहोत सिंपल से घर के मसालों से आप बोहोत ज़्यादा टेस्टी जोधपुरी आलू घर पर बना सकते हैं और इसका टेस्ट इतना शानदार है कि स्वाद ज़ुबान से नहीं उतरेगा | अगर आपको हमारे video और रेसिपीज ट्राई करने के बाद पसंद आती है तो video को लाइक और शेयर और चैनल को सबस्क्राइब, करना बिलकुल भी ना भूलें और साथ में जो घंटी का बटन है उसे भी ज़रूर दबा दे, उससे हमारे रोज़ आने वाली video का नोटिफिकेशन आपको सबसे पहले मिलेगा |

Ingredient

Boiled Potato- 5-6 Medium Size Cooking Oil- 2tbsp Hing- 1 Pinch Fennel Seeds- 1 tsp Cumin seeds- 1 tsp Dry Red Chilli- 2 White sesame seeds- 1 tsp Turmeric Powder- ¼ tsp Kashmiri Lal Mirch Powder- ½ tsp Chilli Flakes- 1 tsp Amchur Powder- 1 tsp Salt to taste #aloomasalafry #jeeraaloo #jodhpurialoomasala Written recipe 1.In a pan put 2 tbsp cooking oil and temper with Hing, Fennel seeds, Cumin seeds, Dry Red Chilli and white sesame seeds. 2. Now add Potato and fry for 2 minutes on medium flame then cover it for 2 minutes. 3. Open the lid after 2 minutes and now add turmeric powder, red chilli powder, chilli flakes , Amchur Powder and salt. 4. Now again Cover the lid for 2 minutes. 5. After 2 minutes open the lid and switch off the flame. 6. Garnish with coriander and serves hot. 7. Serve chatpata Jodhpuri aloo/Rajasthani Aloo fry with Rice and dal Bahut hi tasty masala aloo fry ki recipe jarur dekhiye vanita’s magic kitchen par, delicious jodhupuri aloo ko jarur try kare, rajasthani aloo fry recipe apko jarur pasand aayegi, no onion no garlic aloo recipe, jodhpuri aloo fry, rajasthani aloo recipe, chatpate masala aloo, no onion no garlic aloo ki sabji, सूखे आलू की सब्जी, जोधपुरी आलू मसाला, राजस्थानी आलू, जीरा आलू, jeera aloo, aloo masala fry, potato masala, masala jeera aloo, aloo sabji without onion garlic, baby potato masala fry, no onion no garlic recipe.aloo fry,jodhpuri aloo fry,potato recipe,jeera aloo recipe, potato fry, indian aloo fry, aloo chaat recipe, aloo sabji simple recipe indian street food masala aloo chatpate aloo dum aloo how to cook crispy potato fry quick aloo sabji spicy aloo fry tasty aloo ki sabji instant potato sabzi sukhe aloo ki sabji easy potato recipe

[physicalhealth]

Kashmiri Cuisine: A Culinary Journey

Exploring the enchanting region of Kashmir is a dream for many, and planning a trip there can be both exciting and overwhelming. If you're looking for an immersive travel experience, understanding the highlights of local cuisine and the best accommodation options can significantly enhance your journey. Here’s a detailed guide to help you navigate through your trip to Kashmir, focusing on the best hotels and must-try local foods.

Best Hotels in Kashmir

Kashmir is home to some of the most luxurious and comfortable hotels, ensuring a memorable stay amidst its scenic beauty. Here are a few top picks:

The Lalit Grand Palace Srinagar: This heritage hotel, set amidst sprawling gardens, offers a royal stay with stunning views of the Dal Lake. The blend of modern amenities with historical charm makes it a top choice for travelers seeking luxury.

Vivanta Dal View, Srinagar: Overlooking the majestic Dal Lake, this hotel is known for its exceptional hospitality and breathtaking views. The contemporary design and well-appointed rooms make it a perfect retreat for those looking to relax and rejuvenate.

Hotel Heevan, Pahalgam: Nestled in the heart of Pahalgam, this hotel offers cozy accommodation with panoramic views of the Lidder River and surrounding mountains. Its proximity to major tourist spots makes it an ideal base for exploring the region.

The Khyber Himalayan Resort & Spa, Gulmarg: For those heading to Gulmarg, The Khyber offers an unparalleled experience with its luxurious rooms, world-class spa, and easy access to the famous Gulmarg Gondola. It’s a haven for adventure enthusiasts and those seeking tranquility alike.

Nedous Hotel, Gulmarg: Another gem in Gulmarg, this hotel combines old-world charm with modern comforts. It’s perfect for travelers who appreciate a mix of tradition and luxury.

Kashmiri Cuisine: A Culinary Journey

No trip to Kashmir is complete without indulging in its rich and flavorful cuisine. Here are some must-try dishes that will give you a taste of the region's culinary heritage:

Rogan Josh: A signature dish of Kashmiri cuisine, Rogan Josh is a fragrant lamb curry cooked with a blend of aromatic spices. It’s a dish that perfectly encapsulates the essence of Kashmiri flavors.

Dum Aloo: This vegetarian delight features baby potatoes cooked in a spicy yogurt-based gravy. The slow-cooking method infuses the potatoes with rich flavors, making it a favorite among locals and tourists alike.

Yakhni: A yogurt-based mutton curry, Yakhni is a mild yet flavorful dish often served during special occasions. The use of subtle spices makes it a comforting and delicious option.

Kashmiri Pulao: Unlike regular pulao, the Kashmiri version is sweeter and often garnished with dry fruits and saffron. It’s a delightful accompaniment to the spicier main courses.

Gushtaba: Known as the "dish of kings," Gushtaba consists of meatballs cooked in a creamy yogurt sauce. It’s a rich and indulgent dish that showcases the culinary prowess of Kashmiri chefs.

Kahwa: End your meals with a cup of traditional Kashmiri green tea, Kahwa. Brewed with saffron, cinnamon, and cardamom, and often garnished with almonds, it’s the perfect way to relax and digest after a hearty meal.

Planning Your Trip

When planning your trip to Kashmir, it’s essential to balance your time between sightseeing, experiencing local culture, and relaxing at your chosen accommodations. Here are some tips to help you plan:

Choose the Right Season: The best time to visit Kashmir is during the spring (March to May) and autumn (September to November) when the weather is pleasant, and the landscapes are most beautiful.

Pack Accordingly: Depending on the season, pack warm clothing for the cold winters and lighter clothes for the summer months. Don’t forget comfortable footwear for all the walking and exploring you’ll be doing.

Local Transport: While taxis are widely available, consider hiring a local guide or driver for a more insightful experience. They can take you to hidden gems and provide valuable cultural context.

Safety and Permits: Some areas in Kashmir require special permits for tourists. Make sure to check these requirements in advance and arrange for the necessary documentation.

Kashmir promises a blend of natural beauty, rich culture, and delightful cuisine, making it a perfect destination for a memorable vacation. Whether you’re soaking in the views from a luxurious hotel or savoring the local delicacies, every moment in Kashmir is sure to be enchanting.

By focusing on the best places to stay and the must-try foods, your trip to Kashmir will be both comfortable and gastronomically delightful.

[thedigirealm]

Discover Kashmir's Charm: Top Valleys in Kashmir to Visit in 2024

Nestled in the lap of the Himalayas, Kashmir is often referred to as "Paradise on Earth" for its breathtaking natural beauty. One of the most enchanting aspects of Kashmir is its valleys, each offering a unique blend of majestic landscapes, serene lakes, and vibrant flora. In this comprehensive guide, we will embark on a journey through the top valleys in Kashmir that are a must-visit in 2024. But before we delve into these picturesque destinations, let's first tantalize our taste buds with the exquisite flavors of Kashmiri cuisine, renowned for its rich spices, aromatic herbs, and delectable specialties.

Kashmiri Cuisine: A Gastronomic Odyssey

Kashmiri cuisine is a reflection of the region's rich cultural heritage, influenced by Mughal, Persian, and Kashmiri Pandit culinary traditions. The cuisine is characterized by its use of fragrant spices, flavorful herbs, and slow-cooking techniques that enhance the taste of each dish.

Wazwan Feast: A Royal Affair At the heart of Kashmiri cuisine lies the legendary Wazwan feast, a lavish spread of aromatic dishes traditionally served during weddings and special occasions. The Wazwan is a symbol of hospitality and is prepared with great care and attention to detail by skilled chefs known as "Wazas." The feast typically consists of multiple courses, with each dish showcasing the culinary expertise of the Wazas.

Rogan Josh: The Crown Jewel No discussion of Kashmiri cuisine is complete without mentioning Rogan Josh, the crown jewel of Kashmiri curries. This aromatic lamb dish is cooked in a rich gravy infused with spices like saffron, Kashmiri red chili, and fennel, giving it a distinctive red hue and a heavenly aroma. Rogan Josh is often enjoyed with steamed rice or traditional Kashmiri bread like naan or roti.

Yakhni: Comfort in a Bowl Another beloved Kashmiri dish is Yakhni, a comforting yogurt-based curry made with tender pieces of meat, typically chicken or lamb. The delicate flavors of Yakhni are enhanced with aromatic spices like cloves, cardamom, and cinnamon, creating a dish that is both soothing and satisfying.

Dum Aloo: A Vegetarian Delight For vegetarian travelers, Dum Aloo is a must-try dish that showcases the versatility of Kashmiri cuisine. Baby potatoes are simmered in a spicy gravy made with tomatoes, onions, and a blend of aromatic spices, resulting in a dish that is bursting with flavor and texture.

Kashmiri Kahwa: A Soothing Elixir To round off your culinary journey through Kashmir, don't forget to indulge in a cup of traditional Kashmiri Kahwa. This fragrant green tea is infused with saffron, cardamom, cinnamon, and almonds, creating a warm and soothing beverage that is perfect for sipping amidst the serene beauty of Kashmir's valleys.

Top 9 Valleys in Kashmir to Visit in 2024

Betaab Valley: Betaab Valley, named after the Bollywood movie "Betaab," is a picturesque destination located in the Anantnag district of Kashmir. Surrounded by lush greenery, snow-capped mountains, and glistening streams, Betaab Valley is a paradise for nature lovers and adventure enthusiasts alike. Visitors can enjoy activities like trekking, horse riding, and picnicking amidst the breathtaking landscapes of this valley.

Gulmarg: Known as the "Meadow of Flowers," Gulmarg is a world-renowned hill station located in the Baramulla district of Kashmir. This stunning valley is famous for its verdant meadows, pristine golf courses, and thrilling adventure sports like skiing and snowboarding. Visitors can take a ride on the Gulmarg Gondola, the highest cable car in the world, for panoramic views of the surrounding Himalayan peaks.

Pahalgam: Nestled at an altitude of 7,200 feet above sea level, Pahalgam is a picturesque valley situated in the Anantnag district of Kashmir. Surrounded by dense forests, meandering rivers, and snow-capped mountains, Pahalgam is a haven for nature lovers and outdoor enthusiasts. Visitors can explore attractions like Betaab Valley, Aru Valley, and Lidder River, or embark on treks to nearby glaciers and high-altitude lakes.

Sonmarg: Translating to "Meadow of Gold," Sonmarg is a stunning valley located in the Ganderbal district of Kashmir. Surrounded by towering peaks, alpine meadows, and gushing rivers, Sonmarg is a paradise for trekkers, campers, and adventure seekers. Visitors can explore attractions like Thajiwas Glacier, Zoji La Pass, and Krishnasar Lake, or indulge in activities like fishing, river rafting, and pony rides.

Aru Valley: Tucked away in the Trans-Himalayan region of Kashmir, Aru Valley is a hidden gem known for its pristine beauty and tranquil atmosphere. Surrounded by lush meadows, pine forests, and snow-capped peaks, Aru Valley offers a serene retreat away from the hustle and bustle of city life. Visitors can enjoy activities like trekking, camping, and birdwatching amidst the breathtaking landscapes of this valley.

Lidder Valley: Lidder Valley is a picturesque destination located in the Anantnag district of Kashmir, renowned for its stunning natural beauty and rich cultural heritage. Surrounded by dense forests, snow-capped mountains, and crystal-clear streams, Lidder Valley offers a peaceful escape amidst nature's splendor. Visitors can explore attractions like Lidder River, Pahalgam Golf Course, and Mamleshwar Temple, or engage in activities like fishing, trekking, and horse riding.

Yusmarg: Nestled in the Budgam district of Kashmir, Yusmarg is a charming valley known for its verdant meadows, dense forests, and glistening lakes. Surrounded by snow-capped peaks and alpine flowers, Yusmarg offers a serene retreat away from the crowds, making it an ideal destination for nature lovers and solitude seekers. Visitors can enjoy activities like trekking, camping, and picnicking amidst the pristine landscapes of this valley.

Gurez Valley: Gurez Valley is a remote paradise located in the Bandipora district of Kashmir, known for its breathtaking landscapes and rich cultural heritage. Surrounded by towering peaks, alpine meadows, and gushing rivers, Gurez Valley offers a glimpse into traditional Kashmiri life and customs. Visitors can explore attractions like Habba Khatoon Peak, Dawar Village, and Kishanganga River, or engage in activities like trekking, fishing, and birdwatching.

Tarsar Marsar: Tarsar Marsar is a pristine valley located in the Pulwama district of Kashmir, renowned for its stunning alpine lakes, lush meadows, and panoramic views of the surrounding Himalayan peaks. Surrounded by dense forests and snow-capped mountains, Tarsar Marsar offers a tranquil retreat away from the crowds, making it an ideal destination for trekkers.

CONCLUSION-Kashmir's valleys are more than just stunning landscapes; they are experiences waiting to be embraced. From the heart-pounding thrill of trekking to a glacier to the soul-stirring serenity of a flower-filled meadow, each valley offers a unique story to tell. In 2024, let Kashmir unveil its magic. Pack your bags, choose your adventure, and embark on a journey that will leave you with memories that will last a lifetime.

[24x7newsbengal]

Trailblazing flavours and feasting galore begins with the Kebab Festival at The Nest, EcoHub

Dressing itself in Pujo finery and armed with a dedicated menu for Kebabs is the Nest, at EcoHub, where choices are plentiful at their Kebab Festival which will run from 23rd-25th September. The Festival will leave you with rich and delightful memories, worthy of a pre-pujo succulent spread. The candied aroma of spices from the kitchen, and interactive dining elements, the décor will create an inspiring vibe as you embark on the flavours of the world but with an Indian touch. The delicious spread of Kebabs will transport the guests to a global culinary journey. Guests can select from choices of vegetarian and non vegetarian dishes prepared and grilled to their preference. The kebabs inspired from global flavours will be served to the customers at this unique festival. One can enjoy marinated veggies, and choice of proteins with just the right amount of seasonings.

The beginnings of the fabulous feast can be started with Jaitun Tulsi Paneer Tikka (INR 255), where juicy pieces of cottage cheese will be stuffed with olive tapenade, basil pesto and cooked in a clay oven, then go the spicy route with Bird’s Eye Chilli and Khubani Cheese Poppers (INR 255), where melted cheese and apricot galettes are panko crumbed and fried with a spicy twist. The flavour explosion continues with the favourite Gondhoraj Aloo Banjara (INR 255), where baby potatoes marinated with tandoori spices and the aromatic gondhoraj lemon pairs seamlessly to form a dish worth repeating! The Tandoori Mushroom & Ricotta Duxelles (INR 255), features button mushrooms stuffed with spinach, ricotta cheese, tandoori spices and roasted in a clay oven for that charred finish, the Four Cheese Broccoli Malai Roast spells cheesy delight with peri peri spiced broccolis. The Tandoori Rotolini (INR 255), is the chef’s special potato barrels stuffed with spiced couscous and tabbouleh, the Mediterranean Soya Palak ki Galouti (INR 255) goes the exotic way with sumac and zatar playing a prominent role in the preparation.

The fusion Kaeng Murgh Tikka (INR 355) is a super blend of thai flavours and mughlai with thai green curry infused hariyali chicken morsels roasted in a clay oven, the Peri Peri Murgh Tangri Kebab (INR 355) infuses greek yogurt, generous amounts of peri peri spice marinated drumsticks roasted to perfection. The Three Pepper Murgh ki Seekh (INR 355) has minced chicken with bell peppers roasted in a tandoor. Fish lovers can try the Moroccan Spiced Fish Tikka (INR 655), where chunks of fish are wrapped in moroccan spices and grilled till it melts. The Malai Parsley Prawn Kebab (INR 655), has marinated prawns in yogurt and cheese topped with malai and parsley sprigs for that vibrant finish. The Schezwan Fish Tikka (INR 655) has fish medallions marinated with schezwan pepper and red tandoor marination gives a spicy oriental kick, and the piece de resistance is the Sambal Oelek Mutton Boti Kebab (INR 655), has indonesian fiery sambal paste marinated mutton chunks cooked till delectable.

Mou Mondal said, “Pre-Pujo feasting is taken very seriously in Bengal and what better way to entice our patrons than serving them a short festival celebrating kebabs with a twist. Our patrons will surely relish the rich flavours and the sheer variety of the kebabs and be provided with a supreme gastronomic experience. We are also starting with our Pujo special lunch buffets after this, so that our patrons get to enjoy the best of both worlds.” So head over to the Nest by the Conclave at EcoHub and delve into a stunning array of kebabs and an unforgettable dining experience.

Photography by Biswajit Saha Read the full article

[dilsegourmet]

Hey Guys, I am sharing with you all the recipe of Spicy Baby Potato which is tasty and simple to prepare with all the ingredients easily available in kitchen. do prepare the recipe and comment below.

Subscribe and hit the bill icon to see new recipes :

https://youtube.com/c/DilSeGourmet

[mynewsexpress]

Move Over Chilli Potato, Try This Spicy Baby Potato Recipe By Veranda Restaurant Spicy baby potato can make for an interesting and unique dish. Highlights Spicy baby potato is a delicious chinese-style preparation…

[todaynewsadda]

Move Over Chilli Potato, Try This Spicy Baby Potato Recipe By Veranda Restaurant Spicy baby potato can make for an interesting and unique dish. Highlights Spicy baby potato is a delicious chinese-style preparation…

[scone-lover]

Simon Snow’s Guide to the Best Diwali

AKA, all the delicious Diwali food that Simon would love. ❤️ 

Here’s a teaser... 

And the rest is below the cut!

Let’s start off with an overview of Diwali! (Pronounced Di-VAH-lee.) Celebrated on the night of the new moon, usually in late October or early November, Diwali is the festival of lights and a commemoration of the triumph of good over evil. During this holiday, people decorate their houses with festive colors, light hundreds of candles and oil lamps, and set off firecrackers into the night. It is the largest and most widely celebrated holiday in India, with a variety of colorful customs.

Rangoli are colorful designs crafted at the entrance of homes to welcome the goddess of prosperity, Lakshmi, and usher in the New Year. Rangoli features in my zine fic for Let it Snow!

Diwali has its origins in Hindu mythology with the story of the Ramayana. Rama (Rahm) was a great king and warrior who completed a hero’s journey and returned home after a 14 year exile. However, there was no moon that night, so the villagers set out thousands oil lamps to light the path home. 

Diwali is celebrated over 5 days; Diwali itself is the 3rd day, and the 4th is the Hindu New Year! Read more about Diwali here.

Alright, now for the fun part.

Simon Snow would love Diwali because one of the core traditions is exchanging food and sweets as gifts with your family and friends. Every year, we spend a few days making mithai (milk sweets) or baked goods, and then it’s like the world’s best secret santa. We receive platters of assorted sweets and savories throughout the entire week leading up to Diwali! 

Let’s start with the sweets. The main desserts eaten during Diwali are mithai, various milk sweets that usually include gram (chickpea) flour and nuts or coconut. They are vibrantly colored and usually arranged beautifully on platters! There is a huge variety—here are some examples of arrangements.

Most are simply a combination of condensed or powdered milk, sugar, and gram flour or nut flour. In addition, they’re flavored and adorned with ingredients like rosewater, cardamom, saffron, and even pounded silver. 

Here are some of the more popular types!

Kaju Katli: Cashew mithai, always cut in diamond shapes, and topped with real thin-pounded silver. A classic!

Ladoo: Chickpea flour or semolina condensed milk sweets, rolled into balls. They’re amazing, and the texture is unrivaled. Chickpea flour is fine and gritty, so it’s like biting into a ball of kinetic sand... but actually edible. When I was a kid, we used to make ladoos with coconut and use food coloring to make the Indian flag! Here’s the mix we received this year from a friend:

Barfi: Milk squares that can be made with various flavorings, like coconut, almonds, walnut, etc. So soft. So delicious. Sometimes they’re bright pink.

Soan Papdi: chickpea flour squares that flake away in strands when you bite into them, like if you condensed candy floss into a bar. 

Peda: I don’t even know what’s in these, they’re just fucking delicious. 

Alright, onto the other sweets!

My personal favorite: gulab jamun. Soft, perfectly round dumplings made of like, magic. Basically. They’re sweet, fried, flavored with cardamom, soaked in a sweet rosewater syrup, and served warm. If you haven’t tried these, you’re missing out—Indian grocery stores, and certainly some normal ones, sell them in big cans and you can heat them up on the stove. 

Rasmalai: my other favorite. I don’t know how to describe these—happy spongy dumpling disks served cold in a sauce that’s basically ice cream, but better. Pistachios, delicate rosewater, and sweet creaminess. It’s basically heaven.

Two photos, because they’re that good. (These are definitely Baz’s favorite, by the way.) 

Jalebi: Essentially, batter is piped into pretzel shapes, like how you make a funnel cake, and then fried, and then soaked in sugar syrup. You bite into it with a satisfying crunch, and then the syrup floods out and it becomes chewy. It’s a dentist’s worst nightmare. I mean, look at this shit:

Who even came up with this? I don’t care, I love it. Tis the season for tooth rotting.

Kheer: Indian rice pudding... or sometimes it’s made with vermicelli. With almonds, and saffron, and... agh. I dream about it.  

Last but certainly not least, gajar ka halva. 

This stuff could build a cult following if it wanted to, I swear. It’s like if carrot cake one day said fuck it and stopped pretending it was healthy. It’s ground carrots, sugar, ghee, milk pistachios... so good. 

I almost posted this without even going over the savory foods. Who even needs them? 

...Okay, fine. 

Diwali food is traditionally vegetarian, and it’s pretty standard fare: naan, rice, samosas, daal, paneer makhani, etc. The appetizers are top notch. It’s literally all fried.

That spiral thing is a chakli, jalebi’s savory friend. Just... a fried spiral. Various crispy things are eaten. It’s great.

Brb, might actually cry from how hungry I am right now. 

Simon would love aloo tikki, a north Indian specialty... imo, the best way to make potatoes.

Pakoras, too: mixed vegetable fritters served with chutney.

Pani Puri/Golgappa: The best street food. You take a baby puri shell. Crack the top. Fill it with a spicy potato mix, and then add mouthwatering tamarind sauce.

Paneer Makhani (butter paneer) would be Simon’s favorite veg dish. Soft cheese in butter sauce... sounds right up his alley. 😂 

There are a ton of other different dishes made with various vegetables and sauces and spices, like four types of daal, and if I continue this will go on for ages. So I’ll just do a special shoutout to chicken tikka masala, the national dish of the UK lol. ❤️ 

Shoutout to Penelope Bunce as well for being half-Indian and thereby giving me a totally valid reason to write a thousand-word rant about Indian food on Tumblr and claim it’s fandom. Shoutout also to Simon Snow for his canonical love of Indian food. 😂 

If you’ve made it this far, I hope you enjoyed, found this educational, and most of all... I hope you’re really hungry now. 😂 Go eat some Indian food to celebrate. I know you want to. 

Happy Diwali, everyone! ❤️❤️❤️ 

[sustenance-soon]

foods to make when i get my kitchen back. i swear i am going to cook / eat my way through this list and cross stuff off as i go:

new:

apple lemon ginger drink (apple, 1T lemon juice, 1 slice ginger blended then pour over hot water and add honey and cinnamon)

theroamingchef’s butter chicken and garlic naan

list of british food to cook!

soon dubu ✅

lavendar syrup

korean spicy pork (doesn’t use much soy sauce??!)

CRISPY EGGPLANT (also easy to make low sodium if u just use less sauce on top!!)

spiral cucumber salad!!

french toast breakfast sandwich (egg, cheese, ham or bacon)

korean corn dogs mini w bread

french toast ?

pancakes but like, some cool version

banana bread ✅

zucchini bread

japanese 7-11 egg salad sandwich (just get brioche and use the extra for french toast !)

vietnamese spring rolls — do no salt in the roll (just rice noodle, mushroom, carrot, cabbage, etc + wrapper) and put sodium / fish sauce etc in the dipping sauce!!! yesss

kitchn copycat starbucks lemon loaf (do a shorter version if possible / or freeze some)

coffee cake??

CHOCOLATE COVERED ECLAIRS W CUSTARD

maybe try cream puffs first lol to not have to do everything at the same time

croissants……!!!!!!!!!!!!

cream filled donuts …!!!

KOREAN CORN DOG .. maybe do minis not on a skewer to be able to fry fully. i feel like 1 hot dog could make 3 little corndogs!!!

in fall: COTtage pie! do the fork think on the potatoes so they get crisp up top!! no salt in the potatoes! all the salt in the filling! maybe grate carrots and onion and celery and use ground beef to make it faster. or if cheaper get a cut of whatever beef is used in joc beef curry and cut that into 1/4-1/3” cubes!!! actually i kind of like that idea best.

homemade pizza ✅

palak tofu ✅

yu xiang eggplant

hashimaki

shrimp tempura ✅

congee / porridge ✅

shrimp and carrot kakiage ✅

PANZENELLA OMG??

chocolate chip cookies ✅

KEBAB i want kebab!!

steamed buns!!!! i want to make pork buns…!!

swedish meatballs and mashed potatoes (needs cubed white bread)

and japanese grilled meat and green onion

ok i am adding paprika hendl unfortunately i am not immune to peer pressure of my 25k person book club

quiche!!! ham swiss onion!!!!!!!!! ✅

brownies to have with ice cream or whipped cream and strawberry sauce or other fruit sauce!

chocolate chip and walnut cookie ✅

sour cream coffee cake!

yuzu ice cream via joc!

joc chicken spring rolls!!! wow easy to make low sodium! woohoo!!

french toast bacon and cheese sandwich

frittata ? with ... potato?

nyc japanese-style curry

peter morwood’s pork with chili and chocolate

pork belly shabu shabu salad!!!

bone-in chicken curry ✅

soba noodle salad (needs soba tho wahhh)

swedish meatball and gravy!!

egg curry!!!!

aloo mattar

sushi!!!!!!

fried egg rolls

hong shao pork belly ✅

baby potatoes curry (indian)

mattar nimona?

dahi aloo

vegetable biryani (needs cashews, fresh herbs)

punjabi khadi pakora (needs chickpea flour)

Panch Phoron Dahi Baingan (needs curry leaves)

punjabi dum aloo (uses menthi and cashews)

spicy pork belly stir fry

soon tofu from packet ✅

soon tofu from scratch again

bossam (korean boiled pork belly wrap)

nori sour cream dip ✅

shepard’s pie ✅

fish n chips (i love the idea of frying the chips alongside the fish in the oil!!!!) i need to buy malt vinegar and learn to make tartar sauce. maybe i can use sour cream or yogurt instead of all mayo, that’d be good.

crispy potato tacos! could use leftover tortillas to make quesadillas ... breakfast .. quesadillas... oh boy. i think i want to use mixed corn and wheat together tortillas those are the best to me

chang fen from dim sum!!! steamed tasty guy! plus just other dim sum recipes from scratch!!! bbq pork buns, soup dumplings, shrimp dumplings too!!!

chicken tikka masala

can also use fried fish in corn tortillas with coleslaw for fish tacos !!!

stovetop butter chicken with this sauce and this chicken

honey walnut shrimp ✅

eggplant and tofu (some riff on the panda express vers my beloved lol) ✅

samosas!!!

tomato soup!!! ✅

eggplant donburi omg i lOVE EGGPLANT ✅

kabocha gratin with extra mushrooms and yeah maybe shredded chicken!! oooh making a bechamel!!!! not as scary now that i have made my cream pasta! ✅

tamagoyaki

butternut squash soup

japanese beef curry with tomato

japanese pork belly curry

japanese tonkatsu curry

taiwanese stinky tofu

taiwanese beef noodle soup

stewed pork feet

stewed chicken feet

tiramisu again ✅

mosaic sushi

korean tofu soup ✅

beignets !!!!

nacho cheese

bbq chicken wings or drumsticks in the oven ooooooogh!! ✅

homemade coleslaw to go with ^??

okonomiyaki omg

di san xian but what if i roasted the eggplant and bell pepper and potato FIRST would that not be the shit???? it would not lol ✅

dittalini sage pumpkin and chickpea stew!!

chili and cornbread with roasted carrots

pan fried ginger pork belly ✅

tunamayo or ham and cheese onigrazu

swedish meatballs with roasted carrots

spicy garlic tofu ✅

eric kim's salmon bowl ✅

white fish chowder but use heavy cream and sub extra 1T butter for bacon ✅

crispy roast potatoes

fried tofu with dipping sauce (thai)

satay chicken pork and tofu and eggplant

alu chaat (need sev, good blender) or aloo tikki chaat with tamarind and cilantro- mint chutney ✅

ground beef kebab rolls ✅

chicken biryani and raita

black pepper tofu instead of beef!! ✅

indian egg curry!! and raita!!! (just do another kind of raita lol)

nice foccacia or something dipped in olive oil and balsamic, maybe with some kind of pasta ✅

rabbeokki

handmade wontons

calamari

jalapeno poppers

chicken korma!!!

malai kofta

baingan bharta

indian potato and spinach

a meal that is ALL frozen apps. i am thinking: tiny meatballs, more bacon wrapped dates, mushrooms with something, vegetables and dip. i want to GRAZE FOR HOURS!! bruschetta. caprese salad or on a stick! ham and swiss sliders??? honey garlic cauliflower! brussels sprouts and dip!

chicken parm tenders omg

sweet potato tostada

just bread / veg and dips: caramelized onion dip, nori sour cream dip, guac, eggplant and yogurt dip — these all seem really really doable!!!

ricotta spoonable with pasta, tostini, and crackers and veg (see recipe end notes)

tang cu yu: method 1 + method 2

roasted corn tomato risotto (maybe with yurucamp rewatch??) ✅

braised daikon????? ✅

vegetable / bone stock from scratch ✅

no salt udon noodles!!

spicy wontons oh my gOD i could kill for these

corn salsa

beef and potato stew (maybe lebanese?)

BORSCHT

burmese chicken and potato curry!!

handmade meatballs for spaghetti

lamb meatballs also!! maybe could use leftover breadcrumbs from loso bread

big pot of miso soup with rice noodles, enoki, napa cabbage, firm tofu, tomato!! i just want to make actual miso soup like imamu room instead of always instant miso soup from packet. i dream of miso soup with stuff and fresh rice and little a pickle meal!!

soup dumpling

sukiyaki / tomato sukiyaki from yuru camp

baingan bharta (requires gas stove or charcoal grill for best flavor tho)

easy spicy tteokbokki ✅

korean braised potato

hasselback baked potato ✅

one-pot japanese-style hot pot: fish, enoki mushroom, napa cabbage, tofu, vermicelli. with sesame paste and chili crisp based dipping sauce!!!!!!! (all in one pot, lid, cook, eat. not rounds.) ✅

korean green onion pancake with dipping sauce

faster bai qie ji ✅

yaki onigri!!

queso for one (??) to eat with nachos (sour cream/lime crema, diced or small chopped fajitas, beans maybe, diced tomato, guac, hatch salsa if its still good)

tempura via imamu room husbento week 27 — i can also do green bean and shimeji mushroom! or carrot, kabocha, sweet potato, tofu, yummy! broccoli if that’s what i have, too. maybe it all needs to parboil first? honestly idk but how hard can it be? ✅

vietnamese spring / summer rolls ✅

fried egg rolls

italian bread soup!!!

watermelon and sprite slushy (watermelon, sprite, blender)

seared salmon don bc then i can stop buying it at stores lol (requires blowtorch)

korean tofu with spicy ketchup

leigh smith’s eggplant pasta

easy:

teriyaki tofu ✅

hashbrowns and scrambled eggs with sliver sauce (once my ketchup order comes in!! ✅

croque madame ✅

salads with hardboiled egg ✅

burger and sweet potato fries ✅

guac and chips ✅

baked potato or loaded sweet potatoes (with sour cream and butter and green onions and garlic powder and maybe a little smoked paprika!!) ✅

squid hotdog spaghetti

soup with dipping bread oh my god ✅

cheezits and dip

blta sandwich. bbq chips. fuck YEAH. ✅

medium:

kimchi fried rice!!! ✅ with pork belly is best!!!

kimchi fried rice with some kind of asian mushroom in it and cheese but actually use gochujang this time! ✅

nachos: refried beans, cheese (ideally queso for one), avocado, chopped tomato, roasted corn, fajitas, sour cream, some kind of sweet salsa, hot sauce, rice ✅

burrito bowls ✅

unagi don and rewatch yuru camp s2e3!!!✅

pickles (red onions and bread and butter pickles!!)

medium hot golden curry with PORK BELLY carrot fresh shiitake. celery. potato. cabbage?? tomato?? i feel like tomato curry would taste good.

ooooh pork katsu again!!

onigrazu. tunamayo, cucumber, lettuce. ham and thin egg. just boiled chopped egg and mayo. spam. unagi!?????

tj lee’s taiwanese cucumber salad

ok in general i just need to learn to make more taiwanese food! argh!!!!

tomato hot pot

shrimp and avocado burgers

beef boruginon

lebanese stuffed pitas ??

SHAKSHUKA but maybe half or 1/3 recipe

out:

blaze pizza pizza ✅

bulk boxes of chips oh my goddd yesss sunchips!

hong shao tofu from DE my beloved + soup bao ✅

more ... indian food. i constantly want. indian food. which means i really need to learn to make. indian food. ✅

chipotle, to my eternal shame. i just want. queso!!! ✅

[moonguilt]

random klance and adashi headcanons? 🥺🤲

i have been meaning to put some grocery shopping headcanons out there… so here u go (plenty more beneath the cut as well):

-when keith and lance are falling in love and in their honeymoon phase with each other, they jump at the opportunity to go grocery shopping together because a) they wanna spend every moment with each other, and b) it’s domestic af and it makes them feel like they Have Something

-once they’ve been together a while, the novelty wears off and the laziness kicks in and they both try to find increasingly ridiculous ways to get the other person to go shopping without them

-keith usually goes for willful/feigned ignorance: “what kind of toothpaste did you say you wanted?” like 4 separate times, and then “idk they all look the same to me, i usually just grab whatever” and when lance inevitably goes on a tirade about the importance of his Very Specific brand and flavor, keith concludes with a “maybe you should buy it in person if you want to be sure you get the right one”

-lance’s tactic neglects logos and instead relies on pathos: “keeeith i am so tired” “keeeith my toes are still so cold from the walk home” “i promise i’ll go next time keith pleeeaase kosmo is in my lap and he’s so comfy look at him keith look. we are having a bonding moment keith dont interrupt us”

-when lance REALLY wants something Very Specific and is genuinely worried that keith will mess it up, he will give in to keith’s strategy and just go shopping himself, but 90% of the time keith is a Weak man and lance always gives him a big toothy grin and a kiss whenever he agrees so honestly you can’t blame him

-also it gives him a chance to restock his emergency midnight snack lunchables stash without lance giving him the “you are a grown man and my mamá gave me so many good recipes for us to try out and yet you choose to bring this under our roof” lecture (even though keith is sure that he bought 5 packs last time and only ate 3 of them but now their pantry is mysteriously devoid of lunchables, which means somebody in this house is lying about their disdain for lunchables)

-but ANYWAY sometimes they still actually do go to the store together just like old times and when they do:

-taking turns doing the thing where you run and put your weight on the back of the shopping cart and let it glide-(getting caught doing exactly that by an employee and being told off for it after they nearly knock over a chef boyardee can display)

-choosing an item on the list that they have no idea where to find & racing each other to see who can find it first

-“do you see this toothpaste keith. do you see this? can you see the name? can you read the flavor? you see how it says ‘for sensitive teeth’? do you see it?”-“considering you are practically shoving it down my throat, yes.”-“well then maybe your esophagus will be able to remember it for you next time you go shopping”

-keith grabbing the last pack of rainbow gold fish bc they are his favorite-toddler wanted those goldfish & starts crying-”ah shit fuck hey hey hey uhhh” cue keith turning a desperate look toward lance bc he Does Not Know how tf to handle small crying child-lance is like “dude, baby, sweetheart, my man, just give him the goldfish we can get the regular ones”-but keiths like?? bitch?? i got these first?? also im gay and these are my pride fish?? dont be homophobic-lance is about to argue with him abt it but then the kid’s mom gets involved and is like “how could you make my baby cry he’s just a kid let him have his goldfish dont be selfish”-you’ve activated Protective Lance mode-“um okay first of all, rude, keith got them first. second of all, this isnt even healthy for your kid. THIRD of all these are rainbow colored and keith is gay so maybe dont be homophobic??”-things escalate and keith and lance nearly throw down with karen and little jimmy in the snack aisle-they savor every last one of those fucking rainbow goldfish later that night, just out of pure gay spite

-lance spending several minutes inspecting individual broccoli stalks meticulously to make sure they buy only the very best-he narrows it down to two but keeps debating between them until keith comes up behind him and slumps against his back, wrapping his arms around lance’s waist and muttering something about how cold the produce aisle is-lance makes a snarky comment about keith being a whiny baby & keith retaliates by slipping his freezing fingers under lance’s shirt, prompting a startled yelp and giving keith the opportunity to pluck a broccoli stalk from lance’s hand and put it in the cart

-“okay, while we’re here, let’s grab a cucumber for the salad”-“gotcha, one cucumber coming right up–.. hey.. hey, keith, this one kinda looks like a–hehehe–hey keith, do you think i could–hnnkeehehe–do you think i could fit this one up–”-“oh my god”-“what do you say keith–you, me, this cucumber, a bottle of wine–”-“alright im getting on line.”-“wait wait babe im kidding come back let me put the cucumber in the cart”-“NO go get a different one, i am NOT letting that one anywhere near our salad”

-selfies with the local Stop & Shop robot. lance thinks it’s kind of creepy but keith thinks it’s cute and lance thinks that’s cute, so

-“lance we left the reusable bags in the car”-“quiznak. well that’s okay, we can just use plastic bags this one time and i’ll make sure we put them to good use at home so it’s not wastefu–”-“no. we paid money for our bags. we have to use them. i’ll be right back”-“keith we parked way down on the other side of the–oh my god KEITH WATCH OUT FOR THAT OLD LADY holy shit SLOW DOWN oh my god man”

-keith tries to sneak those storebought sugar cookies, you know the clear-boxed ones that they always put out front with holiday-colored frosting and sprinkles, into their cart-“keith what is with your obsession with processed food”-“it was all had to eat when i was living alone in the desert”---“baby that is very sad and you know i empathize with your tragic anime backstory but put those godawful abominations back or so help me”

-only, keith isn’t the only one who likes processed food

-yeah, another reason keith is so used to it is because even after he started living with shiro, he kept eating that junk because that’s all shiro ever ate too

-shiro is a slut for kraft mac & cheese

-this presents a problem for him and adam, because adam loves spicy food and loves to make spicy food for shiro to eat

-but shiro is a big baby, and due to his inability to cook and his subsequent reliance on kraft & campbell’s & top ramen, he basically has white people taste buds

-adam is scandalized when he learns this the hard way after finding shiro nearly in tears over his half-eaten serving of dum aloo

-adam promptly declares that shiro needs a culinary intervention and they have been working towards the recovery of his palate ever since

-shiro is a creature of habit though, and he will try to convince adam to let them buy kraft mac & cheese whenever they go to the store together (which is often because unlike keith and lance, they never got tired of it and they still consider it a romantic domestic activity to this day. they’re just gay like that)

-when keith and shiro have their “broganights” together they indulge in all their crappy processed comfort food, much to the consternation of lance and adam, who bond over their shared exasperation and begrudging affection for their respective partners

[intheendlessbluewine]

If you ever find yourself in need of yummy vegan snacks, come on over. Absolute Nirvana brought to you by these Aloo Matar Tikki ❤️

[thedigirealm]

Exploring the Best Kashmiri Food and Must-Visit Places in Kashmir

Kashmir, often referred to as "Paradise on Earth," is not only renowned for its breathtaking landscapes but also for its rich and diverse culinary heritage. In this guide, we delve into the tantalizing world of the best Kashmiri food dishes that every traveler must try, along with highlighting the most captivating places to visit in kashmir in this enchanting region.

Kashmiri Cuisine: A Gastronomic Journey

Kashmiri cuisine is a delightful fusion of aromatic spices, slow-cooked meats, and flavorful vegetarian dishes. The cuisine is influenced by Kashmir's geographic location and cultural diversity, resulting in unique flavors and cooking techniques. Here are some must-try dishes:

1. Rogan Josh

Rogan Josh is an iconic Kashmiri dish consisting of tender lamb cooked in a rich, aromatic gravy infused with spices like Kashmiri red chili, fennel, and saffron. The slow cooking process ensures the meat is incredibly tender and packed with flavor.

2. Yakhni

Yakhni is a yogurt-based curry made with either chicken or mutton. The meat is simmered in a spiced yogurt sauce flavored with cardamom, cloves, and bay leaves, creating a creamy and comforting dish.

3. Gushtaba

Gushtaba is a specialty meatball dish where minced lamb is shaped into large meatballs and cooked in a creamy yogurt gravy. The dish is delicately spiced and has a rich, luxurious texture.

4. Dum Aloo

Dum Aloo features baby potatoes cooked in a spicy and tangy tomato-based gravy. The potatoes absorb the flavors of the spices and are often garnished with fresh cilantro before serving.

5. Modur Pulao

Modur Pulao is a sweet and aromatic rice dish cooked with saffron, nuts, and dried fruits like raisins and almonds. This fragrant rice dish perfectly complements spicy Kashmiri curries.

6. Kahwa

No Kashmiri meal is complete without Kahwa, a traditional saffron-infused green tea brewed with cardamom, cinnamon, and almonds. It's both refreshing and comforting.

Best Places to Visit in Kashmir

Beyond its culinary delights, Kashmir offers a wealth of natural and cultural attractions that captivate travelers from around the world. Here are the top places to visit in Kashmir:

1. Srinagar

Srinagar, the summer capital of Jammu and Kashmir, is renowned for its picturesque Dal Lake, where visitors can enjoy shikara boat rides amidst floating gardens and houseboats. Explore the historic Mughal gardens like Shalimar Bagh and Nishat Bagh, showcasing stunning terraced landscapes.

2. Gulmarg

Gulmarg is a paradise for adventure enthusiasts, especially during winter for skiing and snowboarding. In summer, the meadows come alive with colorful flowers, making it an ideal destination for nature lovers and trekkers.

3. Pahalgam

Pahalgam is a serene town surrounded by lush pine forests, gushing rivers, and meadows. It serves as a base for treks to breathtaking locations like Betaab Valley, Aru Valley, and the stunning Kolahoi Glacier.

4. Sonamarg

Known as the "Meadow of Gold," Sonamarg offers stunning views of snowy peaks and lush green meadows. Visit Thajiwas Glacier or embark on adventurous treks amid pristine natural surroundings.

5. Leh-Ladakh

While technically not in Kashmir but part of the broader region, Leh-Ladakh is a must-visit destination for its rugged landscapes, Buddhist monasteries, and high-altitude adventure opportunities like trekking and biking.

6. Martand Sun Temple

Explore the ancient ruins of the Martand Sun Temple in Anantnag district, showcasing impressive architecture against a backdrop of scenic countryside.

CONCLUSION-

Whether you're a food enthusiast eager to savor the best Kashmiri dishes or an explorer seeking the natural wonders of Kashmir, this guide offers a comprehensive overview of the culinary and cultural treasures that await in this breathtaking region. Plan your trip to Kashmir and immerse yourself in its flavors and landscapes for an unforgettable experience.

[slaytorism]

My parents are my biological parents..

On a certain Freaky Friday, a raccoon and I swapped souls. Now, this is how I look like after 10 years, while the coon is serving time in prison for sex trafficking. It is a joke, needless to say. Turns out the said crime is only frowned upon among humans. 

But, never have I not been a bit solicitous around my identity. When I was little, probably 4 or 5, my parents humoured me with an accidental slip of a tongue - that I may have been an adopted child. I was a pretty self aware kid, as all children usually are at that age; so I started maintaining observational notes about behavioural traits, similarities and dissimilarities alike. I presume, these were signs of a boy with an extremely bright future ahead of him. But it was not until the age of 7 I dolled up the courage to confront my supposedly biological parents about this issue. Well, that’s a lie. I was looking for an excuse upon being asked, ‘Why the hell, wasn’t I studying and instead watching TV?’

My only creative response to it was, “Mother, am I adopted?”. My mum was obviously taken aback; established an unusually stern eye contact while adjusting her face to emulate someone who is visibly agitated; as if she was upset about her favourite Hindu deity being featured on a desi edition of the Hustlers magazine. Flabbergasted, her only swift response was, “Well... it depends.” Now wouldn’t you agree that this response is a siren of a sort. All this time I had imagined I could turn out to be a snowflake or a comic book inspiration and here I was, projecting my insecurities encapsulated in a bombshell of a discovery about my birth, which I hadn’t made yet.

Me: “What do you mean, it depends?”

Mum: “It depends on your exam results. Look, it’s no secret. Your father is an accomplished engineer and I am an award winning teacher. So, there has to be something about you that would be socially recognised as a bit academic. Isn’t it honey? (looking at my father) What do you say, dad?”

Dad: “Yeah, yeah - he is fine.”

Me: “What do you mean I am fine?”

Mum: “What your dad means is that, you are so far... not adopted.”

Me: “So, if I perform poorly in the exams, would you put me up for adoption? Mum, I am 7. It’s usually done before human conscience manifests into thoughts and memories. I will remember who you are and frankly, I would be very unhappy with your actions.”

Mum: “Well, let’s not go there young man. WE.. have been pretty unhappy with YOUR actions. (looking at my father) Wouldn’t you say so, Dad?”

Dad: “Yeah, yeah - not good.”

Mum: “Exactly. We have been observing and you are not serious about your education at all. We are concerned!”

Me: “Is that why you’d put me up for adoption?”

Mum: “Now hold on, (pause).. we would never do that..  (looking at my father) right. Dad?”

Dad: “(nodding) Its not as easy as it sounds.”

Mum: “Correct. Also, as you said, it is too late.”

Me: “Is that why? Is that the only reason?”

Mum: “No! We think you’re special.”

Dad: “Did we give him the brochure of the special camp, we are going to drop him this summer?”

Mum: “Oh, yes! Baby, you’re going to a camp for special kids. How exciting!”

Me: “Are you... (whispering) are you calling me the R-word?”

Mum: “(twitching her eye brows) R - what, honey?”

Dad: “He means Retarded.”

Mum: “No! Never! (looking at my father) Right, dad?”

Dad: “Yeah.. we don’t (pause).. we don’t think you are.. (air quoting) the R-word.”

Me: “Then, why am I going to special camp?”

Mum: “Look, we are your parents. We know what is best for you. Just to summarise; a) you are not up for adoption; b) you are not (hushing) the R-word. Good? Now, do you feel better my baby?”

Me: “But that was never my original concern. My question was, AM I ADOPTED?”

Mum: “I have got papers to grade, I cannot deal with this right now; (looking at my father) can you please take care of this?”

Dad: “Yeah.. yeah. On you go! I will sort this out..”

Me: “(whimpering) Dad?”

Dad: “Now look son. (thoughtfully) Do you enjoy spicy hot food?”

Me: “Yes?”

Dad: “Do you know why?”

Me: “I don’t know. I am Indian?”

Dad: “Nope. Of course not. It is a misconception. Indians are more genetically prone to have ‘peptic ulcer’ than most other racial communities in the world. It is demonstrably incorrect to assume Indian food is spicy hot. What is more accurate is.. Indian food is simply.. (with pride) ‘spicy!’. (spelling out) i.e.? We are the best in the world when it comes to flavours in our diet!”

Me: “I don’t get it.”

Dad: “Can you list out all the meals that your (a bit loud, enough for my mum to hear from the kitchen table) BEAUTIFUL MOTHER ... has been cooking all this week?”

Me: “Well, yesterday we had Palak Paneer (Cottage Cheese with Minced Spinach Gravy), day before Gobi Aloo (Curried Cauliflower and Potato)  and Tadka daal (Spiced lentil soup); before that, Bhindi Masala (Okhra in spicy gravy)? The day before that..”

Dad: “Nope. There you go.. I mean, well done. You got the first two correct. But, no Bhindi my friend. It was Baingan bharta (mashed Aubergine with herbs) and vegetable stew.”

Me: “Oh. Yeah. (confused)”

Dad: “You take it lightly my friend but this a fortune not everybody is lucky to have. (he continued) You. Are. Getting. Freshly cooked, delicious meal every single night for your dinner and every night it is different!”

Me: “Okay..”

Dad: “Meaning, you are not having the same garbage some of your friends have, EVERY NIGHT!”

Me: “Well.. my best friend’s muuuu..(interrupted)”

Dad: “..I would not finish that sentence, if I were you.”

Me: “Understood, sir.”

Dad: “Now, what I was saying... “

Me: “Why do I enjoy spicy hot food more than an average gassy Indian men...”

Dad: “Well put (high-five-ing).. and not just enjoy, you can TOLERATE it better also.”

Me: “Is that my superpower?”

Dad: “No! That shit will kill you someday. But you’re 7 now. Anything you eat is simply a blessing, really. You’ll figure it out yourself in future. Hopefully after you’re 18. Depending on how the summer camp goes.”

Me: “(staring blankly)”

Dad: “The point is, you are different.”

Me: “I know! I totally, knew that! Thank you, Dad!”

Dad: “And, it is simply because Alcohol is super cheap in Srilanka.”

Me: “.. wait, what?”

Dad: “Yes! 8 years ago, your mum and I, travelling young and free in the mystical land, eating the shitty shit Srilankan food.. just chillies, really. We had been eating chillies for 10 days straight. Goes without saying, one good night, we find a cool British pub, we get super hammered and what do you know, voila! (pointing at me).”

Me: “(staring blankly)“

Dad: “Dude! You were conceived in Srilanka! That’s why you are so good in gulping chilly soup all day.”

Me: “What is ‘con seeve’, dad?”

Dad: “Well, that part comes from your mum. Not me! At least, you can breathe easier buddy. You are not adopted! Congratulations, man!”

Me: “I guess, that’s a relief. I guess, I am not adopted.”

Dad: “In theory, yes. Definitely. Not Adop..(switching on the TV).. I need to watch the news buddy, do you wanna go to your room?”

Me: “Okay, dad.”

Mum: “(oblivious to the whole discussion) Guys, I am tired. Can we order some takeaway tonight?”