#startingover

[atomiccreative]

Where there is death, there is life

[in-tenebris-et-in-solitudine]

[zenwords]

Breakups are ok. Starting over is ok. Moving on is ok. Saying no is ok. Being alone is ok. What is not ok is staying somewhere you are not happy, valued, or unappreciated, that’s not ok. — Unknown #breakup #startingOver #movingOn #sayingNo #beingAlone #happiness https://www.instagram.com/p/CmALDzRuG-F/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[skylarmoon71]

Timeless Wells (Flash) Soldier- Chapter 1

Surviving a war wasn’t hard.

It’s the path that came after.

They always said that the battle would be hard. For you it really wasn’t. Most of your life was a fight. Jumping from home to home was no way to live. So when you were offered a chance to serve, you took it. Not because of patriotism. Nor was it for some need to protect. It was only for a roof over your head, warm clothes and something to eat. You were strong, you’d always been. So fighting for a cause was worthwhile.

Months, years of training and drills, you were exposed to the real thing.

Life.

It was cruel.

Brutal.

Standing out there with a rifle in your hand and the people you’d come to call your friends drop one by one felt unreal.

For the first time in your life, you felt fear. Not for your own life. But the ones of the people who actually had something to live for. Someone to go back too.

“Fall back!!”

You ducked behind the boulders after the yell from your lieutenant.

“Sir we’re surrounded!!” Your evaluation was an understatement. If you made it out of this situation alive, it would have been a miracle. His head laid back on the rock, clutching his tags. You just watched. Waiting for some kind of signal from him. It was down to the both of you. There were more than a dozen people out there. You swallow.

“I’ve got a little sister back home. For the longest time it’s just been the two of us. She’s always taken care of me. Whether I live or die out here, her tuition is getting paid. I was a wash out. I’d never done anything good with my life. She is the only thing that matters to me.”

It feels like yesterday that he’d told that story. All of you had been sitting at a checkpoint as you went over lost loves and past screw ups. You’d never been someone of sentiment. That’s why you’d spent the night just listening to the very entertaining stories of your comrades. Your family.

He was your family.

Maybe your life didn’t have to be for nothing. For once, this felt like a decision you made out of understanding what was next. Not just a choice for your convenience.

“It’s been an honor sir.”

His eyes shift to your side, and when you jump from behind your spot, he panics, rushing to load his gun.

“S-SOLDIER STAND DOWN!!”

He cursed, scrambling to reload. His attempt to follow was stopped, because the onslaught of bullets continued. He jumped behind a thicker rock. You just lifted your weapon, taking out as many enemies as you could. The crashed truck from earlier presented a good cover. Huffing, you did a mental note of the positions of each person. You’d only managed to strike down two, and that alone felt like sheer luck.

Gritting your teeth, you continued. Your first shot took down another, and you gasped when a bullet struck you right in the shoulder. Eyes clenched in pain you pushed through. You're fired with all your might. The second your bullets ran out, you accepted your faith. There were maybe six men left. Help was ten minutes out. If your Lieutenant was smart about his approach, he could survive this. So you dropped your empty gun, waiting for the inevitable.

The sound of lightning ahead is what seems to stop all movement. At first you assumed it was some kind of enemy battleship that was approaching. Because the earth seemed to shake. But your enemies didn’t look very reassured. Because they had seized all attacking to look at the gaping hole that opened in the sky. You staggered back, eyes wide in disbelief.

That doesn’t seem like the only unrealistic situation. Just beneath it, your eyes catch a flash of green. The light seems to disappear just as fast as it came.

“YALE!!”

Your mind just barely processed your name being called. Your superior was sprinting in your direction as he fired his gun. It’s obvious that he was just as terrified at what seemed like an impossible anomaly in the sky. He took down each target, easily. They were far too distracted by the freaking worm hole that appeared in the sky. The second he was by your side he grabbed your hand.

“We need to get the hell out of here!!” It was an order, but your body wouldn’t move. It refused to.

“SOLDIER!! WE HAVE TO GO!!”

You blinked, staring at him. Motion returns to your body, and the second you take a step, your Lieutenant is thrown at least ten feet away by what looks like a spark of lightning.

“LIEUTENANT!!”

Your scream echoes and so does the clap of thunder. You race to his side. When you drop to your knees, you check his pulse urgently. He’s unconscious, but alive. You sigh, dropping your head on his chest in relief.

“I’m back.”

The tremoring tone of something behind you makes the hair stand up on the back of your neck. You turn around shakily, greeted with demonic red eyes. This stranger is wearing a bright yellow suit, with a bolt as what you can only assume is his emblem. If you can call it that. The red slowly retracts from his eyes, and you make out a very human gaze. Blond hair, dangerous eyes. This is not a friend. It can’t be.

“W-What the hell are you…”

He tilts his head, a satisfying crack ringing. His steps are slow, taunting almost. A sinister smile planted on his lips.

“Never mind who I am. It seems you both are in a tough situation.” His eyes mark the many dead bodies. Some of which are people from your squad.

“You’ve lost quite a bit of people, how tragic. “

His tone is mocking, and you grit your teeth. Your evaluation of an enemy is correct. Your eyes drift to a gun a few feet away. One you hope has bullets for you to at least defend yourself.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you.”

Your eyes dart back to his form.

“What do you want?” You try to level your voice. Because he seems to get off on your fear. He’s just a few feet away.

“Ultimately, I’m going to kill the Flash. But I suppose I could have some fun here with the both of you. What year is it, where are we?”

Your mouth stays shut. You aren’t sure who or what this Flash is, but it can’t be good if this thing is after it.

“Not in the talking mood.”

You barely have a chance to breathe, because your body is lifted right off the ground. You struggle to pull in air as he holds you upright. You grab at your neck, but his grip offers no resistance.

“Speak.”

Your gaze hardens. Even though you’re terrified, you would quicker die then let this enemy gain whatever it is he’s after.

“Maybe if I kill your little boyfriend over there, you’ll be more willing.” He shoves you to the ground, and you hit the dirt with a grunt, coughing, gasping.

He moves over, the sound of dirt beneath his feet are like daggers to your chest. You crawl, trying to stop him.

“N-No...”

The closer he gets to your lieutenant, the faster your heart beats.

“If I manage to make it back after this tour, I promised her I won’t come back. It’ll be over. We’ll move to a nice quiet town in Florida and just enjoy life. “

You sob at the words of your commander that rush back.

The man kneels, lifting his hand that now appears to be vibrating.

“I’m going to kill him, then I’ll make you suffer until there is nothing left. You’ll wish those men had killed you.”

It all feels like it’s happening so slowly. His hand is aimed right for your Lieutenant’s heart.

“STOP!!!!”

A pulse of green flashes throughout the entire terrain, and he grunts as his body is forced into the air. You stare as his body hits a boulder. He’s wedged between the rock, and all you can do is gape. You’re still somewhat groveling in the dirt, You can hardly comprehend what just happened. But it’s clear that whatever it was, he’s not happy about it. He pulls his limbs out of the rock aggressively. When he’s free, the deadly red light in his eyes return.

“I’m going to kill you.”

He rushed forward, but didn't even make it within ten feet of you or the Lieutenant. His body is stopped by what you can only assume is an emerald shield. The bubble sound it makes is so loud. Both your bodies are completely sheltered. The being in yellow slams his hands angrily against it. When it's clear that he can’t get through, his angry grunts turn into laughter.

“I will be seeing you again.”

The tone of that brings an unpleasant chill. In a rush of red lightning, he is gone.

There is nothing you can say to try and make sense of all that has just happened.

All you can do is be thankful that you are still breathing.

That is all your brain can truly process.

It is the only thing that appears real.

[eric-sadahire]

Seems irresponsible to start another year the very next day after this one ends.

Borderline reckless.

[sagenatural]

New Post (2/19/23)

...on the primary website.

[getawaykar-89]

got bored and started writing a story based off of champagne problems from the other person's perspective. 4 chapters are posted <3

[sirravenous2]

My whole life has been a rollercoaster.

I've fought through the very physical as well as degrading mental abuse from childhood. That experience turned to evil vengeful hateful actions during my 20's. Always hiding my depression.

Then being betrayed by the one person I thought wouldn't do me harm.

People trying to exploit me when down.

My love blinded me.

I thought my life would never got better.

I completely had given up on love.

Fuck, I couldn't trust anyone, especially with all these online fakes a hundred a day.

Wrong guy, I smell scammers from half way around the world!

At this point I no longer believe that anyone could accept the love I gave, honest, loyal, communicating, passionate nurturing love.

And I can't see anyone that could literally legitimately love me back loyally & being truly honest & open.

And if I did try the girls must of thought they were far too damaged, they didn't deserve wholesome pure love or the famous bullshit;

I must be too good to be true!

Smh...

Deep down I hoped some one would come along & show me the true meaning of what a committed relationship was.

We could share notes, effort & iron things out...ll

Love we both are missing.

I'd be singing in the shower again, content finally.

I just wish too much in a world full of damaged people quick to compare a great guy or girl to their last piece of shit narcissist or abusive cunt, or a thief of time, money, ability to trust, etc...

Is it possible that an actual truly good person could maybe, just maybe have their own little fairytale; if people could let go of past idiots or gold diggers or shit humans?

Should one just wait for it till it's too late, or your tomorrow didn't come?

Fuck... I don't know.

I've been close, but no cigar.

I'm still waiting, searching, not like I used to.

Because shit, I've walked the soles from my feet trying to hopefully find my person, that one & only.

And with a heart that bleeds, it's fractured & still pained...

My mind nowadays relentlessly guarding the last pieces of the only heart I have, pushing more people away because through experience being single my 1st thought about each new person is: Bitch is fake, A dude from Nigeria/Ghana who knows..with some stolen pics of some poor girl who has no clue a Motherfucker is pretending he's her. (I'm never fooled, all fakes have suck ass grammar).

If I approach any woman to learn who they are, and to see if they are my compliment, not my completion.

It'll turn out I'm not their compliment because they want more than me, more like material things or monetary gain not love & romance happily ever after!

With this world going government ape shit with control actually being the 1% or ELITES, YOU ALL NEEDN'T BE WORRIED ABOUT MONEY & THINGS!

More like who will be by your side when majority of population are just things controlled, used or disposed of like trash?

Time counts, time never stops & what passes is forever gone, no money can buy time back, you cannot bargain or borrow time.

No money will purchase happiness or love.

And NOBODY is promised tomorrow!

So no rush to love out of fear!

Yet I weigh on each hand what's worse?

Dying alone still waiting on an imaginary perfect person?

Or, not dying but aging till the heart slows too much & the search ends & nobody their to even know you're dead?

As the sunsets in our eyes that final time, you turn to look beside you:

I want to see in someone eyes that's right there saying my last I love you, & go in peace because our lives were full.

After all what becomes of that real lover, the soulmate that never had deviant motives or hidden agenda?

They never had silence, gave all of themselves, always loyal, affectionate with passion & compassion and was always honest, never abandoned you?

That's loving.

Real living!

Or...

A heart beating slower saddened wasting what somebody missed because of pride, shy, comparison of that past experience keeping them there, pushing others away as if that last narcissistic guy still has control or became magically this new legitimate person?

And then twin flames who missed connection..

Sadly both alone, apart, yet still simultaneously hearts stop beating.

It's over.

Your mind is a good thing but we should always trust our heart & gut more and our mind plays tricks!

Just hear me out...

Don't let the last fuck up person or your mind seal your heart.

And never having the chance to have your last beat be with the one you belong with.

Nobody is promised a tomorrow.

[workingonwisdom]

My Anger Box

When the sh*tstorm that was my 'restructuring' happened, my husband told me that it was OK to be angry. Indeed, I could be as angry as I liked for the next two weeks, or even a month. Truly revel in my anger - take it out for walk daily if need be. But then I had to move on.

My husband is a wise man. Because when something truly odious happens to you, it is ok to feel angry. It is healthy to feel mad, enraged even, because you are totally justified in doing so. But the trick is knowing how to let go and more on.

I'm a pretty positive person, so I don't like spending my time with negative feelings. But in this instance it was needed. I needed to let the poison out so it would not fester and, ultimately, take me out.

To help myself move on quicker, I created my Anger Box. It is a little box in my psyche, where I have put my justified anger. Every once in a while, I let it out and have a little moment with it. I don't feel bad about doing so, I don't feel guilty. I just blow off a little steam, and thusly relieved, put the feelings back in my Anger Box.

By following this strategy I am not denying my feelings - ‘cause, boy, do I deserve to have them. But I am also not letting them run my life. They have their place, and I do not deny them that. But I also know when to say 'ok guys, that's enough. You need to go have little nap now'.

In the article 'What does anger do to your body? The physical and mental effects of anger' on thriveworks.com, Kate Hanselman (Psychiatric Mental Health Nurse Practioner) tells us that 'it’s healthy and normal to feel angry from time to time! However, if we don’t take the time to manage and recover from our anger, we’re at risk of suffering from negative effects — both physically and mentally'.

The article goes on to explain that anger releases huge amounts of cortisol and adrenaline into our bloodstream; this is a biological response which over the long term can interfere with the body’s ability to heal itself.

"Occasional anger is fine for the body — as long as there is a recovery time for the body to clear itself of cortisol and adrenaline. Constant and building anger are detrimental to the body and often are ignored because a person has become accustomed to living in a toxic and over-stimulated environment," adds John Sovec (Physchotherapist).

Patrice Douglas (Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist) also gives us a deeper explanation of what happens to the body when anger takes hold, and how harmful it can be.

"When we are angry, it takes three seconds for our body to go into full fight or flight mode, which means our body is ready to take on an attack. When angry, we stay in this state for approximately 30 minutes each time we are mad throughout the day. This creates exhaustion and wears on our bodies causing weaker immune systems, which then leads to a higher risk of infection.”

“Having body in attack mode can increase blood pressure and rapid heart beating, which can ultimately cause heart attacks or a stroke [later in life]. Many people report feeling exhaustion and headaches when having anger issues. While anger is an extremely important emotion to have as it alerts us when something is wrong and change needs to happen, health-wise it can be dangerous if it occurs frequently and/or lasts for too long.”

We can exhaust our bodies with anger, leading to weaker immune systems. And a weaker immune system means a greater risk of becoming sick."

Seems as if I am on the right track with my Anger Box. It keeps my anger in a healthy contained place, where it is not ruling my life. And, like dealing with a feral cat, each time I let it out it is a little less ferocious. I'm not saying there will ever come a time when it's cuddly, but I'm hoping that someday we will at least be able to peacefully co-exist.

Image sourced from a video by WorkshopTinkering on youtube.

[thegirlwiththe-mask]

Is It Enough?

when do you know when enough is enough? Is it when your heart has been broken too many times or you have no choice but to walk away? Being in a toxic relationship for so long can trick your mind into thinking what's wrong may be right, what's wrong may be the only right your gonna get and so you settle. When has one had enough? After all the nights of holding in the tears when you know if you show any sadness it will be a fight. Sometimes we hold on to fear and do not even know. The fear of change, the fear of what's on the other side, the fear of the unknown. Does Fear force us into toxic relationships? or the lack of confidence? Can childhood trauma be a factor? Sometimes we commit ourselves to make someone happy we can forget who we are. Losing yourself is not permanent but it's not too late to find yourself again.

[cornerboothseatconversations]

Sometimes the first sip’s too hot and you end up burning your tongue...

"this previous trip around the sun has been a whirlwind.'' I suppose I should've packed light. my bags are very heavy, I haven't really stopped long enough to assess the damages. I guess in a way I haven't truly accepted what's happened. I keep telling myself it gets easier.....

[mleighsquickspot]

image: Fantasy background. Holographic illustration in pastel colors. Cute cartoon girly background. Bright multicolored sky. Vector. 4796594

We all have to keep trying my friends.

[randomlynavi]

Where in the World is Navi?

Where in the World is Navi?

Hello! Hope you’ve been doing well. It’s been over two years since this site has been up, but it hasn’t been very active. I set up this blog back in October of 2020, but a few days afterwards my brother, my one and only sibling, passed away tragically in a hiking accident. This tragedy shattered my family in ways that I never saw possible. For the longest time after that nothing seemed to go well…

[cemoimonde]

[eric-sadahire]

I lived it: I played a cool song at a party...

but everyone was fucking talking.

[realtor-arielle]

Don't be afraid to start over again. This time you're not starting from scratch, you’re starting from. experience. -Biggs Burke