#staying afloat

[plague-of-insomnia]

The Promise AU: A Sebard Love Story

I’m very proud of this AU, and it’s very personal for me. I realized I couldn’t find a post for the first part of this series here on tumblr. So I decided to make a new post with links to all the currently published parts of this story. I would love if you read it and commented if you enjoyed it!

Please see individual pieces for their ratings and tags, as they vary.

Part I: The Promise

Sebastian pressed his head against Bard’s chest as if he were trying to meld them as one, letting loose a long, drawn-out sigh. “What’dyou do this time,” he mumbled, his breathing beginning to even out.

Bard held Sebastian, rubbing the other’s back in soft, soothing circles, rolling his eyes and scoffing. “Why does everyone assume I’m to blame?”

Relaxing further, the tall man began to grow heavy against Bard. “Tell me again, please?”

Bard wrapped a leg around one of Sebastian’s, as if his arms weren’t enough to keep his husband secure. “I won’t let anyone hurt you. Not today, not ever. I will protect you. I promise .”

Part II: Staying Afloat

Bard carefully perched on the edge of the bed beside his husband and linked his fingers with Sebastian’s far longer, more elegant ones, smoother, not covered in calluses and old burns. “We will get through this. Together. I promise.”

That made Sebastian smile faintly, even as tears struggled to break through. He refused to let them fall. Not now. He had shed more than enough over the past few weeks, and he was ready to stop wallowing in self pity and start trying to fight again. It was tiring being buffeted by waves constantly, but he wasn’t alone. He had someone to hold him when he felt ready to give in to keep him from sliding beneath the surface. Someone to help him stay afloat, to support and cherish him.

Part III: A Hopeful Halloween

“I got to cross ‘virgin’ off my sex bucket list.”

“Bard . . . I wasn’t—”

Shaking him subtly, as if to emphasize his point, Bard stared hard into his husband’s eyes, to leave no doubt that he was sincere. “You were to me.”

Sebastian’s lip and chest trembled. He slapped a hand over his mouth, but a sob burst through anyway.

“Hey, hey, shit. I’m sorry. I‘m an idiot. Forget I said anything.”

Sniffling, Sebastian shook his head emphatically. “Thank you.” He drew his fingers along Bard’s sideburn, scratching the stubble, making his husband shiver. “You never saw me as tainted, did you?”

Surprised, Bard replied, “Never.”

Part IV: Riptide

Kissing Bard always felt like coming home .

A home that Sebastian actually wanted. A home where he felt safe and loved. Licking his lips, savoring the taste of cigarettes and beer and Bard , he stared into his husband’s beautiful blue eyes. Eyes that had never looked at him with pity or disgust.

Absently, he trailed his fingers along Bard’s five o’clock shadow; he’d always loved the way the stubble tickled. A stark difference from the near flawless, hairless, overly-soft skin of his uncle.

Sebastian wanted to tell Bard out loud how much he appreciated and loved him, but the words caught in his throat.

Part V & Part VI: Coming Soon

Fan art originally by @geekeciel

[thejaytapes]

Me and my Partner's inksonas 💚💙

[maxgaspard1]

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[moth-ed-man]

EVERYONE GO WATCH JOE HILLS

[nibeul]

uncle aaron in spiderverse fucks me up so badly because here is a man who has done terrible, unforgivable things, and he loves his nephew very much

[aro-bird]

Okay, for aro awareness week, I need you all to start recognizing that:

NOT EVERYONE IN THE ARO COMMUNITY IS FROM THE UNITED STATES OR EUROPE.

Please, when we're having discussions about aphobia, allonormativity amatonormativity, and other issues for the love of god STOP PRETENDING THAT WE DON'T EXIST AND LISTEN TO US!

We aren't just your token aros that exist in the other side of the world just for you to prove that we are everywhere or whatever point you're trying to make, we are living, breathing human beings and members of the aro community and we deserve respect and to be remembered not as a point in your discourse but as equals.

I am sick and tired of people just assuming that everyone in the community is either from the United States or Europe and only centering those voices in the discussion. We exist too.

[tennis-shenanigans]

okay but has lewis witnessed ANYTHING that happened with Ferrari in the last couple of seasons???!??? like at ALL?!?!?!??

[kryptid-kat]

We should normalize being the average artist who never really goes viral and is happy in their lane creating for their own sake (be it commissions, or art for themselves).

The clout chaser mentality of all social media sites rotted our brain where we can't find value in our work unless it has a big number besides it.

Create for yourself, not to please some elusive algorithm that changes on a whim and pushes you back to square one.

[wife-beam]

we don’t make enough jokes about sqq’s workers rights persona

[tiny-crescent]

oh noo. I got a message in my inbox asking about Task Force headcanons, and now it's disappeared :') but I made these drawings to answer their questions– so I'm going to post it anyway!

long story short, I love the Task Force with all my heart, but I don't actually feel like I have many personal headcanons for them since I prefer to stick to canon as much as possible when writing fic. which is a really boring answer!! but I do have a few here and there, as well as just general thoughts on each character. so here they are!

[nomattertheoceans]

Staying Afloat - chapter 23

chapter 22 | chapter 24 | masterlist

The cake was good, although a little too sweet for her taste.

She was sitting on the couch of the breakroom beside Rhys, mostly listening as he caught up with a few of his former colleagues. She smiled as Agent Jones showed her a picture of his newborn baby girl, then got up to grab a coffee from the vending machine.

A woman was already waiting for her coffee, and smiled at Feyre as she grabbed her cup.

“You’re miss Archeron, right?”

Startled, Feyre nodded. “I am, yes. How do you know my name?”

“Oh, sorry. I’m Detective Ericksen, I’m in charge of the homicide case that happened at your house.” Feyre tensed up, but the detective continued. "I talked to Knight earlier, he told me that you might be interested in getting an update on how things are going.”

“Oh. Actually I'd really appreciate that.”

“Follow me.”

Feyre glanced at Rhys and found him looking at her already. He gave her a reassuring nod, and she smiled in return before following Ericksen out of the room and to her desk, where they both took a seat. The detective opened a file and perused the inside before talking.

“First of all, I want you to know that Detective Knight lied to you that night when he talked about erasing fingerprints from the murder weapon and the body. Those prints, along with his testimony, are more than enough to charge Mr. Hart with first-degree murder.”

“Then…” She wasn’t sure she was supposed to be asking questions, but Ericksen simply looked at her, so she continued, “why haven’t you?”

“We were waiting for Knight to be pulled out of his assignment. Once we arrest Hart and his lawyer gets access to the file through discovery, we couldn’t ensure Knight’s safety, so we chose to wait a couple of months.”

Feyre nodded. She was glad Rhys’ safety seemed to have been the priority, even though she wanted Hart to go to jail for what he’d done.

“I don’t know if you can tell me this, but what about Tamlin? Will he be arrested too?”

“Mr Atwell? Probably not right away, but eventually, yes, just like Mr Hart. He’s an accessory to murder, so he’ll face charges. We don’t have much on him apart from Knight’s testimony, though.”

Tamlin would be arrested for helping in covering up Sandy's murder. She wasn’t really sure how she was supposed to feel about this. A few months ago, she would have been devastated to imagine him going to jail, but now… Now she was much more at peace with the idea. Another question came to mind, one that she was almost too afraid to ask. But she had to.

“Am I going to be charged with that too?”

Ericksen shook her head. “No. You and Knight have immunity, the thing you signed when you become an informant. We couldn’t charge you even if we wanted to.” Feyre let out a sigh of relief at that, and Ericksen chuckled. “Don’t worry, Miss Archeron. Your job as an informant was extremely valuable, and nobody is forgetting that anytime soon.”

It was a little strange to hear, the idea that what she’d done was indeed valuable, and not just something that would be a footnote on a piece of paper. Amren had made it clear that the evidence she had gathered on Tamlin’s company’s deals with Hybern Inc. would be crucial for their case, but she still had a hard time believing it.

At that moment, Rhys joined them at the desk, taking a seat beside Feyre. Ericksen acknowledged him before focusing her attention on Feyre once more.

“Actually, there was something I wanted to ask you. We’ve had a full account of the events that led to the homicide thanks to Detective Knight, so I’m fairly clear on what happened that night. But I would be interested in getting your full testimony, too. It would be very useful if we could enter you as an official witness for the case.”

“What would that entail?”

“Well, you’d have to give a statement here first, then once the case goes to trial, you will probably have to appear before the court.”

“That would mean… It would mean being there with Tamlin and Hart, wouldn’t it?”

“Not necessarily. If we deem it necessary, we could have your testimony protected so that you wouldn't have to be in open court. But it's a possibility, yes. We would have you protected, in the eventuality you'd appear in court. And they still wouldn’t know anything about your involvement in the investigation against Hybern. Those cases aren’t linked directly, so you wouldn’t be at risk for that.”

“But,” she turned to Rhys, “what about you? If you appear in court, won’t they know about your true identity?”

He shook his head. “I won’t appear in court. It’s complicated, but my statement won’t have my personal data on it.” He leaned forward, and laid a hand on her shoulder. “Feyre, you don’t have to say yes if you’re not comfortable with this. My testimony is plenty enough to get a conviction, and I don’t want you to not feel safe.”

She wanted to say yes, she wanted to feel like she could say yes in a heartbeat and not regret her decision. But the idea of seeing Tamlin again was terrifying.

“Do I have to decide right now?”

Rhys shook his head. “No, you don’t.”

“Well...” Ericksen started, but Feyre saw Rhys throw her a look, and she didn’t continue. So Feyre turned back to Ericksen.

“I just… I need some time to think about it.”

Ericksen seemed to think for a moment, before she nodded. “Of course, Miss Archeron.”

Feyre could feel that her answer wasn’t the one the Detective was hoping for, but she couldn’t give her a better one right now. Not when she thought of the bruises that were slowly turning a clear yellow on her wrists.

***

It felt strangely good to be coming back to the house after an afternoon at the precinct. Feyre already knew she loved the place, but settling down on the lounge chairs outside, with a pack of beer and a couple of pizzas, she really felt like she was coming home. Especially with the warm presence of the man seated beside her, currently busy opening a beer for her.

“You’ve been very quiet since we got home,” she started, grabbing the bottle he was handing her. “Is everything okay?”

He nodded slowly. “I’m fine. It’s just very strange to be surrounded by all those people all of a sudden. I spent years pushing all of this away, and suddenly I’m eating cake in the break room like not a day has gone by. It’s a little insane.” He handed her one of the pizza boxes, and she started eating while he kept talking. “It’s happy and sad at the same time. Jones had two kids, Martinez got a promotion,... meanwhile I’m trying to remember what it feels like to not have to lie to everybody all the time.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I knew what I was getting myself into when I accepted the mission, and I’ll get over it eventually. It’s just that I’m not sure I fit in with them anymore.”

“Do you not want to go back to working as a cop?”

He shrugged. “Maybe not. I’m not sure yet, to be honest. Right now all I want is some time to get used to having a normal life again. Being able to connect with people without fearing for my life every second that goes by.”

“You connected with me.”

The words were out before she even realized what she’d said, and she felt her cheeks heat up when he looked at her.

“True. But you were easy to connect with.”

“Really? I’d have thought our meeting was a bad moment for you. What with you unknowingly telling me about a drug deal and all.”

He laughed. “It was a stressful night, I’ll give you that! But still a good memory,” he added with a soft smile, looking directly into her eyes.

“For me too.”

They went back to eating for a moment, the sun slowly sinking behind the horizon in front of them. Finally, as Feyre finished an umpteenth slice of pizza and emptied her beer, she said:

“Rhys, can I ask you something?”

“Sure.”

“Your colleagues at the police station, what do you think they think of me?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, to them I’m just the ex-girlfriend of a drug dealer who’s enjoying an immunity deal to get out of murder charges.”

“Nobody thought that, Feyre.”

“How do you know?”

“Well first of all, most of them have no idea who you are. Ericksen knows because she’s the lead on the case but that’s pretty much it. And I can guarantee you that people don’t see you that way when they first meet you. You give off much too positive vibes for people to dislike you.”

”Positive vibes?”

He smirked at her, “Very positive.”

Saying that, Rhys handed her a new bottle of beer and she grabbed it, enjoying the brush of his fingers against her as their hands met for a brief second. She took a sip of the cold beer and took a second to admire the varied colors of the sunset before asking:

"And what did you think of me?"

"What?" 

"What did you think of me when you first met me?"

He stared at her for a second before turning away. "I don't know."

But she had learned how to read him over the last few months, and she knew there was more to it than he admitted. She playfully pushed his elbow to make him look at her again. "Liar! I'm sure you remember."

The colors of the sky were playing tricks on her eyes, because when he answered, she could have sworn he was blushing slightly. "I… I don't wanna say."

"Why?"

"Cause you'll make fun of me."

"No I won't." He raised an eyebrow at that blatant lie. "I won't, I promise." She couldn't hide the excited smile on her face, and she saw him look at her and bite his lip. He looked away again, but this time she could feel the shift in the air between them, and she knew he was going to tell her, so she laid back on her chair and waited. He had been staring at the sky for a good while when his answer came.

"I thought you were the most beautiful woman I had ever seen."

She felt her heart starting to race at the answer she hadn't been expecting, but could feel was honest. She wanted to think about how to answer him, but nothing seemed to come to her mind as she looked at him and took him in, a faint smile on his lips as he sipped his beer, his eyes lost in the sky, or maybe lost in the memory of a party so many months ago, on the other side of the river. She wanted to answer, and yet she couldn't seem to be able to form coherent thoughts at the sight of him. But he wasn't done.

"You were leaning on the rail of the garden, in a gorgeous green summer dress, even though the weather wasn't anywhere near good enough for that, and you were so beautiful. But what really got to me was the expression on your face. You were staring at the Rainbow like… like it was a painting, like you were in an art gallery and you were watching a masterpiece in front of you. Your hands were fidgeting around your glass of champagne but you didn't seem to realize it, you were just lost in the landscape in front of you. And you were so beautiful."

For all that she tried, she couldn’t look away from him. And suddenly, she felt an urgency inside her, an irrepressible need to tell him what she had kept from him until now.

“It was you.”

He turned to her, his eyes still lost for a second before he focused on her. “What?”

“When I left Tamlin, it was because of a painting I made. A painting of the night of the party. I painted the river, and the starry sky, and the Rainbow, and… and you. That's why he was so angry. That's why he came to see you when he was looking for me.”

On any other day, she would have expected her confession to make him smirk and tease her, but not tonight. Tonight, she knew he wasn’t going to act that way. She could feel the change in the atmosphere around them. It terrified her. She didn’t want it to stop.

He looked at her, set his beer on the ground between them and slowly moved his hand to hers, interlacing their fingers.

“What happened to that painting?”

“He destroyed it,” she answered in a calm voice, despite the turmoil of emotions that had taken over her body.

His smile faded away. “It’s a shame, I would have liked to see it.”

She was staring at his eyes, at his lips, at their hands linked together so naturally. And she felt guilty. She released his fingers and turned away, looking at the sunset again, not wanting to meet his eyes for fear of losing control. But she could still feel him staring at her.

Finally, he turned back to the view and said in a taunting voice she knew all too well:

“If you ever want to paint me agan, Darling, I’m all yours.”

She rolled her eyes, slapped him lightly on the arm and mumbled an “insufferable” under her breath. But she was grateful to see him go back to a familiar terrain between them. They kept talking as the stars settled around them, the conversation flowing easily between them.

Taglist (please send me an ask if you want to be added or removed from the list!)

@quakeriders @summernightskyy @illyrian-bookworm @amren-courtofdreams @vanilla28 @philosophorumaurum02 @illyrianbeauty @kybaeza @sincerely-unidentified @highladysith @the-regal-warrior @kiss-my-mass @highlady-of-dusk @amusedowl @fucking-winchester-trash @sleeping-and-books @l0sts0uls1128 @everything-that-i-love @fourshizzle149 @musicmaam @voiceoftheroses @avenrebekah @queenofdorkville @outofstyles13 @bowdawn @city-of-fae @welcometothespeaknowworldtour @notyourclassicshadowhunter @ellenoftroy @staticpetrichor @propagandaprincess @ame233 @hopelesslyinlovewithbooks @shadowstar2313 @eve-of-the-night-court @fireheart-of-your-dreams @feeoly @alifletcher2012 @faefromthenorth @emmejo26 @lowhangingtreebranches @mynewdreamwasyou @feyrearcherons @ttakeitbacknoww @rtheinkqueen @thereaderandfangirl @the-last-apprentice @whilma-warfstache @julemmaes @meltalgel-ig @wifeofchrishemsworth @worldoffae @thesurielships @chemicha @kindofawalkingpoem @booksstorm @empress-ofbloodshed @awkward-avocado-s @thesirenwashere @tswaney17 @belamoonbeam @faequeenaelin @hedwig1751 @booksatteatime @over300books @keshavomit @girl-who-reads-the-books @tonystarktrash @thestarwhowishes @nitrot150 @randomtogacotar22 @greatwombatblaze @heroesofterrasen @worldoffae @lovemollywho @waves-and-dust-in-the-wind @blackjacks-donuts @faellyrian-warriors @becarefuloflove @m-like-magic @blueeyes425 @szklanydwormaas @becky8110 @lemon-check @bamchickawowow @flora-and-fae @girlofmanyfandoms148 @bat-wing-rhys @queenophelia @i-love-all-books @bellatrixship @queen-of-glass @always-singhal @emikadreams @aelinfeyreeleven945tbln @trinitybailey2003 @illyrian-tattoos @cursebreaker29 @sjmships @jesstargaryenqueen @yourtypicalbookworn @ireallyshouldsleeprn @lovelaces @booksofthemoon @stardelia

[maxgaspard1]

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[much-ado-about-whumping]

Help for when you’re having a rough time

(If you're looking for my old pinned post with my whump masterlists, you can find it here.)

In light of some deeply sad news in the whump community today, I’m thinking about how many of us here struggle with mental health, sometimes including physical or mental self-harm and suicidality. Since I know lots of folks might be having a hard time right now, I wanted to share some resources that have helped me in rough moments. Please feel free to add on to this post (or make your own, if you want!) with the resources that have worked for you. 

First, a note:

Trauma, shame, and suicidality all tend to isolate - they make us feel like we’re all alone in the world, like no one else would understand us, and like the only solutions we have available to us are ones we can think of all by ourselves. In my experience, the antidote to that is connection. If you’re feeling scared or alone, you can hop into my asks or DMs if you want. I’m sure there are other folks in this community who would offer that, too. Many of us have grappled with mental health struggles, including suicidal ideation, and sometimes we can offer each other the care that can be hard to offer ourselves. Don’t be afraid to reach out if you need support.

A quick note about location: I live in the US, but about half the resources in this post are written guides you can access from anywhere. The hotlines and warmlines linked below are US-based. One or two are accessible in Canada or have an online chat or moderated forum that could be accessed anywhere. If you have good local resources from another place, please reblog and add them! (Thank you, @straight-to-the-pain, for flagging this in the notes!)

That said, here’s my absolute first recommendation if you’re feeling generally awful and don’t know what to do:

1. You Feel Like Shit (also available at its original site here)

If you’ve read a lot of ~self care tips~ in your life (and if you’re a bit of a salty bitch like me), you might be sick of being told to eat something and take a nap. (I don’t think we can hydrate our way out of long-term trauma and late-stage capitalistic hell, but thanks.) That said, I’ve found this site REALLY helpful. Personally, I have ADHD and CPTSD, a combination that makes it ROUGH for me to know how to take care of myself sometimes. This site speaks to you calmly, like a non-judgemental friend, and walks you through steps that you might struggle with if you have a hard time with executive function in general, or if you’re ill, grieving, overwhelmed, or otherwise just off your game. I pretty much always walk away feeling at least a little better, even if I don’t complete every step.

There are more suggestions and resources below the cut. Wishing everyone in this community love and care. <3

2. The 15-Minute Rule (info available in many places; after a quick google, I really like this site as a place to start)

One key principle to understanding the resources I’ve put together here is the 15-minute rule. If you’re feeling an urge towards physical or mental self-harm or suicide, studies show that the urge is unlikely to last more than about 15 minutes at its peak intensity. (Sorry I don’t have data on this off the bat - anecdotally, I can tell you that this rule also tracks with my own personal experience.) This means that, if you’re presently feeling overwhelmed by grief or pain that’s turning inwards on you, if you can stay afloat through the next few minutes, the tide of it is likely to ebb. The site I linked above has information about this concept and some great harm-reduction ideas, too. (Another resource on this that I liked in my quick search is here.)

3. Read This First (a compassionate distraction from feelings of self-harm)

I’m gonna be honest; this resource is aimed at folks having urges towards physical self-harm, but it looks like something I would find helpful with urges towards emotional self-harm, too. (It also looks like it could be handy for body-focused repetitive behaviors - BFRBs - like dermatillomania/skin-picking or trichotillomania/hair-pulling).

4. Resources from Pete Walker, psychotherapist and author of Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving

Obviously not everyone reading this will have complex PTSD (also called C-PTSD), but if you’re a person who, in general, tends to beat yourself up a lot, I’d highly recommend checking Pete Walker’s work out. If some of it doesn’t apply to you, that’s okay - take what you need, and leave the rest. This site (and the book it references most heavily) assumes you may have had parents who were emotionally or physically abusive or neglectful. If that doesn’t ring true for you, but other parts of the resources seem helpful, use them anyway! A handy place to start maybe this page on Shrinking the Inner Critic in Complex PTSD (that is, reducing the volume of the voice that screeches unpleasantness at you when you feel ashamed or scared).

As a note: this website looks VERY mid-2000s (which I kind of love). Most of the resources you want will be in the right-hand column full of links. Some of those links will open new pages, and some will automatically try to download a PDF of the article you want to read. 

5. Warmlines:

This is something I just learned today - if you’re feeling really lonely and sad, but you’re not in immediate crisis, there are warmlines you can contact! These seem to be numbers where you can call (or sometimes text) to talk with a counselor or trained peer when you need support and connection. I can’t vouch for any of these numbers personally, but as someone who has definitely thought, “It’s not bad enough to REALLY need help,” I think this is a fabulous idea. Here’s a list of warmlines you can check out in the US.

6. Specialized hotlines: 

There are lots of good crisis hotlines out there, but some may be better for your needs than others. For one thing, if you’re feeling seriously suicidal, it’s good to know the policies of the hotline you’re calling. In my opinion, everyone deserves bodily autonomy and the right to refuse care; for that reason, I think it’s important to know the policy of the hotline you’re calling as to whether or not they’ll call emergency services without your consent. Everyone has to make their own judgment call on this one, and I’m a little too (lightly!) triggered to go deep into my analysis on this right now, but I wanted to flag that it’s something to be aware of - if you’re going to call a hotline, you can try to look up their policy on calling emergency services before you contact them. You could probably even ask them in the beginning of the call. (A script: “Before we start, can you tell me what your policy is about contacting emergency services on behalf of callers?” If this is true, you can add: “I’m having some feelings of [suicidality/self-harm], but I’m safe and am not in danger of hurting myself or others.”)

With that in mind, here are some hotlines that seem promising to me, in no particular order:

A. For queer and trans folks in general:

Trans LifeLine

Available in the US (1-877-565-8860) and Canada (1-877-330-6366)

Available in English and Spanish

Will NOT call emergency services without your consent (you can read more about this policy on their website, including here)

Peer to peer support for transgender and questioning folks; also, microgrants (small amounts of money) for trans-related needs!

Does not offer text/chat-based support

I’ve never used Trans LifeLine myself, but I’ve heard excellent things about it from peers who have.

The Trevor Project:

Support from trained counselors for queer, trans, and questioning folks

Definitely available in the US; I’m not sure where else.

Offers support via phone (1-866-488-7386), text message (678-678), and online chat (link here - scroll down to Start Chat)

Also offers an online peer support space, TrevorSpace, for folks ages 13-24

Their site says, “In very specific instances of abuse or a clear concern of an in-progress or imminent suicide, Trevor counselors may need to contact a child welfare agency or emergency service.” When you click Learn More, it takes you to their Terms of Service (informative, but in legalese that might be hard to parse if you’re in crisis).

Again, not a service I’ve used myself, but I’ve heard good things!

B. For BIPOC folks (Black folks, Indigenous folks, and people of color more broadly), especially those who also hold LQBTQI identities:

Call Blackline:

Available via phone or text (both at 1-800-604-5841)

Available for people in crisis. Call Blackline can also help connect you with local community organizers and officials if you need to report a negative, inappropriate, or physical interaction with police, other law enforcement, or vigilantes.

From their website:

Call BlackLine® provides a space for peer support, counseling, reporting of mistreatment, witnessing and affirming the lived experiences for folxs who are most impacted by systematic oppression with an LGBTQ+ Black Femme Lens.Call BlackLine® prioritizes BIPOC (Black, Indigenous, and People of Color). By us for us.

Here’s what I found regarding their policy on emergency services:

You do not have to provide any personal information to use the service. All calls remain private and will never be shared with law enforcement or state agencies of any kind.

Of course, a BIPOC person can contact any hotline for support, but for people dealing with racism, anti-Blackness, and other specific bigotries, I can very much see the importance of talking to someone who shares or understands that experience.

C. For folks processing bad psychedelic trips:

Fireside Project:

This one is something I didn’t even know existed! They do call- or text-based support (1-623-473-7433, or 1-62-FIRESIDE) for people processing psychedelic drug experiences, available 11am to 11pm Pacific time. I don’t have a ton more info, but their site seems really interesting and like they’re serving a unique need.

7. A soothing distraction:

One of the glories of the internet is the fact that it enables us to conjure up images of kittens at a moment’s notice. In that vein, I want to offer up a VERY cute distraction: Peptoc is a hotline (1-707-873-7862, or 1-707-8PEPTOC) where you can hear encouraging messages in English or Spanish from kindergarteners. How sweet is that? (Thanks to the wonderful @newbornwhumperfly for this suggestion!)

--------

Beloved whump community, I want to know about things that help you when you’re struggling. Please feel free to share them if you want.

And, Moya - we’ll miss you so, so much, even those of us (like me) who didn’t know you well. May your memory be an absolute blessing. <3

(I was going to put this in the tags, but oops, it’s going up here - I really hope this post will be helpful to someone, but it was also helpful to me to build. I feel better in a crisis when I can find a way to help - it’s how I soothe myself when I’m sad or scared. I really hope this doesn’t seem preachy or self-aggrandizing - it’s really just me processing-processing-processing. <3)

One more note: if this post makes you think you might want to follow my blog, you're totally welcome, but you should check out my note here first. This is not a DNI list; it's just a heads-up about my content, which could be inappropriate or triggering for some people.

[ebp-brain]

I probably shouldn’t wade into this but: as much of a bummer as it is to have to pay for stuff that keeps you happy in dark world, the watcher folks are just…not slimy profit-seeking sellouts. they are being squeezed to death by this particularly grim stage of capitalism where everything is dictated by advertisers and corporations who only care about profit for shareholders. I’m pretty sure they just want to make art free from corporate influence and pay their workers a decent living wage. it totally sucks for their largely low-income audience. but I think they are trying to remain viable and very specifically trying NOT to sell out to clickbait-hungry, mediocrity-producing capitalism.

[sea-buns]

[takes a long drag of a cigar]

[caitlynmeow]

Also, I'm sorry but you cannot convince me that these three know how to swim. Modern/human AU or actual game, those three gremlins do NOT know how to swim at all.