#stop ignoring your responsibilities erik

[bigautomaton]

you mean i have an excuse to draw Wet horror? like. Wet Wet? bust out what The Thing taught me Wet?

[nicohischierz]

one in a million: luke hughes

tagging: @ivy-34, @francesfarhadi, @hzstry8, @cixrosie, @itsnotgray, @estapa94, @trevs-swiftie, @heartz4hischif you want to join the taglist let me know!!

he searched for you at every gathering, the saving grace and the only incentive he needed to attend anything.

the two of you would often hide away from the rest of the party. consumed in a world where it was just the two of you.

a world with no responsibilities and no comparisons.

luke understood you and you understood him.

“i’m gonna miss this when i’m gone,” luke whispered.

you smiled up at him, snuggling further into his chest. luke was your calm during the storm. the one person who always put you first.

both of you wished everyday could be like this.

“so you’re going to jersey? straight after frozen four, win or lose?” you asked.

he nodded.

when the game was over, luke only searched for one person. he found you almost immediately. to him, you stood out in the sea of faces, wearing his ntdp jersey.

luke tried changing as fast as he could to meet you but the devils representative stopped him. "I'm sorry but they want you on the plane immediately," the guy explained.

"i need to see her," luke fought.

the guy shook his head. "i'm sorry kid," he ushered luke away, giving the boy a solemn look.

walking into the locker room, you noticed the sour looks on everyone's faces. but at this point, you were only looking for one face and he didn't appear to be there.

erik portillo saw you first.

he initially came to tell you he was signing with the kings but when he saw your frantic nature, he knew he had to tell you about luke's departure.

the tall swede ushered you outside, making sure you were away from the media commotion before whispering "he left sötis,".

you almost let out a laugh before looking at erik. "that's not funny erik, where is he?" you asked.

erik's eyes were a giveaway that he truly wasn't lying. luke had left without so much as a goodbye.

your breathe was shaky as you looked around the hallway, tears filling up your eyes once again.

once you were back in your hotel room, you did what any sane person would do. you texted luke, telling him what a coward he was for leaving you like that.

lukie pookie: call me

that text alone sent you into a spiral.

obviously, you didn't call him. he was the one who left without saying a word so he should be the one to pay for the pain he caused you. a pain that rivalled what you felt with the pressures of the world.

it was obvious to everyone who knew you and luke that something was going on.

the once energetic duo, now barely had the energy to say hello.

after luke left the others started to leave one by one.

nolan joined a team in russia.

the seniors said their last goodbyes before going off.

mackie signed with the panthers.

and when erik left you felt as if things were changing too fast.

you followed the swedish boy to california and stayed with him until you wrapped your mind around what was going on.

alex turcotte was shocked to see you when he arrived to training one morning. well, he was shocked to see the shell of the girl he once knew. the chicago native immediately texted jack that you were in california and asked what happened.

“sötis, you can’t hide here forever.” erik prompted. he was currently trying to find flights for the two of you back to michigan so that you could spend summer with your family.

you ignored him and ate your soup dumplings. “i’ll pay the rent cost while i’m here erik. please don’t make me go back,” you begged.

but alas, erik had enlisted the help of alex who had brought trevor along with him. both older boys had their bags packed and tickets in hand as they reached the apartment.

“listen y/n/n, we’re not taking no for an answer. now either you pack your things and follow us or we pack for you and you get stuck with whatever we choose,” trevor gave the ultimatum.

rolling your eyes, you walked into your room as the three boys followed. they smiled as they watched you pack, happy that their slight threat worked.

erik drove the three of you to the airport and gave you one big hug before whispering “stay there for two weeks and if you don’t like it, i’ll buy you a ticket to sweden,”

you nodded. now you just had to get through two weeks and complain that it was a horrible experience.

“but you’re not allowed to make yourself hate the trip,” erik added. you hated how well he knew you.

that’s how you found yourself waiting for jack to pick you, trevor and alex from the airport.

jack ignored his two best friends as he ran over to you. engulfing you in a hug, spinning you around. “i missed you squish!” he exclaimed.

you smiled into jack’s shoulder. “i missed you too rowdy,” the middle hughes held onto you a little longer before greeting his friends.

the car ride to the lake house was silent in your part as you furiously texted erik about your dislike for his plans.

upon reaching the house, you were greeted by your fellow michigan classmates. they all yelled in delight at your presence and swarmed you into a hug.

“we thought we lost you to sweden!” dylan exclaimed, his arm around your shoulder.

you chuckled and looked to alex and trevor. the two boys wearing cheeky grins as they grabbed you bags. “well if it weren’t for these two i might’ve gone with erik,” you answered.

luke looked from a distance. pain and hurt in his eyes as he watched you interact with your friends and his family.

once everyone was done greeting you, you looked up at luke and smiled. the boy smiling back at you but no words exchanged.

you didn’t talk to luke until the boys first party.

just like every other party, you were hiding away on the roof. it didn't take long for luke to find you but once he did, he was glad.

the two of you sat in silence until you spoke up. "you didn't say goodbye," you murmured.

luke's heart broke as he heard your voice crack.

"they didn't let me bubbles. i wanted to come say bye to you but the guy said I needed to get on the plane. then my phone died and I didn't get any of your calls. when I tried to call you back it didn't go through," he ranted.

at this point, you were turned to luke. tears in both your eyes as you finally spoke about your feelings over the past two months.

"you're my best friend luke and we promised we'd be there for each other. you promised you'd never leave me and you didn't say goodbye," you raised your voice slightly.

more tears were streaming down your faces. your chest rose and sunk furiously as you tried to remain calm.

when luke didn't say anything more, you made your way back into the house. you glanced at him one more time before reaching his door.

"you weren't at my debut," he exclaimed.

you stilled and turned to him. "i was there luke. i bought the first available ticket to new jersey and the first ticket i could get my hands on for the game." you confessed.

luke's eyes softened. he ran over to you and brought you in for a hug. your face was nuzzled in his chest as both of you cried in each others arms.

"i don't want to lose you again bubbles," he whispered.

"you never lost me lukie,"

[songficsbyrissi]

Do You Remember part 4

Warnings: mentions of past trauma (emotional abuse?, miscarriage, mentions of possible infertility), swearing (of course),/mentions of sex, I didn’t proofread sorry 😭

*Click for part 3*

********

“I think I fucked up, T.” Erik groaned loudly, taking a seat on his full size bed.

“When do you not?” 

Erik sucked his teeth at T’Challa’s smart ass reply. He was over here having a damn crisis and his cousin wants to joke. He pinched the bridge of his nose trying to hold himself back from punching the air.

“I told her I loved her.”

T’Challa stopped chuckling and went silent. Erik sucked his teeth, rubbing his forehead in frustration. The silence was killing him. He needed advice, and his cousin wasn’t saying shit. He wasn’t sure why he said it. At the moment, it just felt…right. It wasn’t until he retired to his room he realized that was the first time he said it. He had no idea how you felt about it or if you even heard it. Or did you hear it and plan on ignoring it? There was so many possibilities and they were all fucking with him. He didn’t want to lose you.

“Well…do you love her, Erik?”

“I wouldn’t have said it if I didn’t fucking mean it.” Erik snapped in response, which cause T’Challa to chuckle.

He heard some movement from Ashanti’s room and knew it was you. He bid T’Challa goodbye, not without hearing him express how he needed to meet you now. Erik had expected you to come into his room as always, however you didn’t. He didn’t hear you leave, but your presence was not in his bedroom. The anxiety was killing him, so he exited his bedroom to find you halfway between his front door and his bedroom door. You were staring ahead, breathing heavily. Erik slowly approached you and carefully took your hand into his, quietly begging you to say something. He was terrified. It looked like you were having another panic attack and he felt like he was the cause. Once you got your breathing together, you quietly spoke.

“I wanted to run…” you started, taking a large gulp and swallowing. “But I couldn’t.”

Explains why you were halfway between the outside and his bedroom.

“You said you loved me.” You finally gave Erik a glance where he saw there was unshed tears in your eyes. Oh no. He fucked up. Erik let a low breath, looking down on the floor and using his other hand to hold the back of his neck. 

“Sorry…maybe it was too soon to say th-“

“So you meant it?” You questioned, cutting him off. You wanted to be happy that Erik loved you, but you couldn’t. He can’t love you.

Erik groaned at the fact that he was gonna have to pour his heart to you once again. He was never the nigga to pour his heart this much to a woman. The man wasn’t sure if it was him being a #GirlDad that softened him up so much or because you just had that effect on him. Maybe a deadly combo of both. The female species would be the death of him.

“Yes, of course I meant it. I wasn’t trying to put you on the spot or make shit uncomfortable. If you ain’t feeling it, baby girl-“

“You can’t love me, Erik. You just can’t.” You began to cry and his arms immediately wrapped around you in a tight embrace. You sobbed on his shoulder and lifted your head to release yourself from his hold, but he didn’t loosen up.

“Please, Erik, let me go-“ 

“WHY?!” He yelled, causing you to flinch. He quieted down, remembering his sleeping daughter in the other room. Before you could open your mouth to reply, he cut you off again.

“Why can’t I love a beautiful, smart woman? Please tell me why.”

You sniffled. “Because I can’t give you everything. You’re a wonderful man and you deserve the world and I can’t give it to you.”

Erik was confused now. “What? What do you mean?”

“Kids!” You screamed, taking a step back. Your boyfriend was still confused because he didn’t recall ever bringing up the conversation of having kids with you, even though that was something he didn’t mind.

When he didn’t say anything, you took it a sign that it was finally time to explain yourself.

“Ever since I could remember, I always wanted to have children. Always. During college, I started dating a man and eventually we got engaged. As much as I wanted to wait until we were married, he said we had the time in the world to get married so I was ok with being engaged for years. But he brought up children and wanted us to have a baby so we tried for a baby and…”

He was listening intently and you loved him for that, but it also hurt because you knew you were doing this trauma dumping to just leave him in the end. 

You swallowed hard, holding your head up. “We couldn’t. We couldn’t conceive. When we finally did…I lost it. I grieved so much for my lost baby and I thought he was grieving too but the whole time, he was secretly mad at me. Everything was my fault. I was the reason it was so difficult for us to conceive. I was the reason why we lost it. I mean I had one job, right?! Carry the damn baby and I couldn’t do that!” 

More tears came out as you sat down on his sofa with your face in your hands. As you cried, he sat next to you, just holding you, still not saying a word. You took a deep breath and continued.

“He got checked and his sperm was fine so it was pretty obvious it was on me. The resentment he had towards me, the hate in his eyes when he broke off our engagement…I hurt him so much. I told myself I would never hurt someone like that again and be ok with never becoming a mother.” You then turned him, giving him the saddest smile he’s ever seen in his life.

“But then, I fell in love with you. I don’t know when it fucking happened, but it did. Once you said you loved me, I realized I did too, but, we’re in too deep so I have to go.”

“Do you wanna leave me?” Erik finally spoke. He didn’t sound angry, he didn’t sound sad. He sounded… calm.

“Yes.”

“I don’t believe you. Because if you sincerely wanted to end this, you would’ve left, but you stayed.” 

You looked down at the ground. “Erik, please. There’s no way you still want me after what I told you.”

You’re a broken woman, Y/N! Why would I or anyone want you?!

Erik grabbed your face, making eye contact with you. “Well, I still want you. Now what? We going to bed?”

“Erik-“

“First of all, ain’t nobody worried about having another baby right now. I live in a 2 bedroom and that little girl is my world, but a pain in my ass and my pockets!”

You held back a laugh as he continued. 

“And yes, maybe down the line, I would like to have a couple of more babies, but Y/N, I told you once and I’ll tell you again, I ain’t your bitchass ex. There’s so many other options and he didn’t want to take those with you, but I would. You know, if we get to that…”

Your face softened as you caressed the side of his face. You didn’t say anything, so he continued, taking of your hands into his.

“Baby, I appreciate you telling me all that and I hate that you went through that.”

You sighed, smiling despondently. “I’m sorry for trauma dumping on you. I just… needed you to know…”

He pecked your lips and smiled at you. “Have you thought of talking to someone?”

“Like a therapist? I remember you not believing in therapy in high school.” You were taken aback. “What was it? ‘White men’s way of getting in the head of the negro.’”

Erik groaned loudly, causing you to finally laugh. “Of course you remember that. I’m not that much of a hotep anymore.”

You giggled and he smiled, kissing you again.

“It feels good hearing you laugh again. I see you got your issues and shit, I got mine. But we gotta work on that shit and not ice each other out. We can’t fix each other, but we can still there for each other.”

You smiled widely. “Erik, I love you.”

“You better.” 

You hugged him tightly and he hugged back just as tights with his lips near your ear.

“Besides, us breaking up would be bad.”

You pulled away, slightly. “Yeah, Ashanti would be hurt.”

Erik shrugged. “Yeah but to be honest, I was referring to the fact I gotta stay calm in those damn PTA meetings knowing I fucked one of the teachers.”

You gasped loudly, shoving him hard so he fell back on the couch, causing him to guffaw loudly. 

“You’re sick.”

“And you’re sexy.” He sat up, kissing your lips and you let him.

Erik might’ve been vulgar and annoying at times, but you loved him and he loved you.

You still couldn’t help that nagging feeling in the back of your head that this was gonna end and end badly. Trauma was truly hell.

The next morning, you woke up with the sun shining directly in your face. You groaned loudly because what was the point of Erik having blackout curtains if he wasn’t gonna close them? Speaking of that man, where was he? He usually slept in with you on Saturdays, still getting up before his daughter. Oh shit. Erik was supposed to wake you up so you could leave before Ashanti got up. 

You sprang out his bed, removing his t-shirt you slept in so you were fully naked. You didn’t sleep with panties on, which Erik thanked the gods for. The bedroom door swung open, revealing your boyfriend and causing you to yelp, diving into the bed to cover yourself.

“Erik!” You couldn’t help the flustered look on your face. Him, on the hand, had a grin that rivaled the Cheshire Cat. He was biting his bottom lip and you hid your face in embarrassment. 

“Baby girl, I’ve seen that before. Why you acting all embarrassed?” He commented, closing the door behind him. You groaned audibly behind your hands.

“Yeah during…You know. Not…like this.”

“There is no difference, but your body is looking so much better in the sunlight, baby.” He savored the small glimpse he got of your smooth brown skin, glistening in the sunlight.

You attempted to ignore the tingling in your cheeks as you stared at him, annoyed. “I know it’s your room, but you could’ve knocked!”

Erik chuckled putting his hand on his chest, apologetically. “I’m sorry. I thought you were asleep. I have some…guests that wanna meet you.”

“Me? Why?” You were confused. It couldn’t be his parents. Both of his parents died when he was young, so who could it be that wanted to meet you?”

Erik shrugged and you could tell he was getting shy. Erik getting shy was a rare and wonderful sight. You got to savor it for a bit before he spoke.

“Just important people to me and since you’re important to me, I think y’all should meet.”

You giggled, feeling mischievous and all embarrassment forgotten. “So I’m important to you?”

It was his turn to feel embarrassed, especially since he was the one that usually did the teasing. He picked up a stuffed animal Ashanti left in his room and threw it at your head as you fell back, laughing.

He told his people to step outside for a minute while you went to the bathroom to doing a quick routine. You did leave clothes over here in case Ashanti ever caught you sleeping over so you could act like you didn’t spend the night. Why was it a big deal? Because you and Erik were still keeping up the image that you two were just nice friends that spend time with each other and kiss occasionally. It was to preserve her innocence and also seeing your teacher sleeping in your dad’s bed had to be extremely jarring for a six-year-old to witness. How do you even explain that?

Once you finished your routine, you took a deep breath and let yourself out of Erik’s bedroom to find two people sitting on the bar stools. They looked like a good looking couple. All 3 of the adults all turned to look at you, giving you a smile. Oh fuck. Your anxiety was on a full on high now. Before you could even speak, the woman got up from her seat and pulled you into a tight hug. Fuck, she was strong.

“Hello! It is so nice to meet you finally! I am Nakia!” The beautiful dark skinned woman smiled so widely at you and you returned the smile, anxiously.

“I’m Y/N. It’s nice to meet you too.”

Nakia turned to Erik, gushing. “Erik! She is way more beautiful in person!”

“Yeah, I told you that” he replied in a “duh” voice, but he was looking away, scratching the back of his neck. The sign that he was nervous and you weren’t sure why he was. The man she came with cleared his throat and got up from his seat. He walked as if he was royalty. Who were these people?

“Come on, Nakia. You are hogging my future cousin in law.” The man gave you a wink and put his hand out to you. “I am T’Challa , or you can call me T. This is my fiancée, Nakia. It is a pleasure to finally met you.”

You took his hand to shake when he pulled you into a tight hug, which left you flustered. He released you from the hug, giving you a wide, gap toothed smile.

“I hope you don’t mind. Our people are very affectionate.” Nakia commented, matching her fiancé’s smile. Just now, you were noticing they had accents. 

You finally spoke, giving them a nervous giggle. “That’s ok. I’m honestly happy I got to meet Erik’s family.” You directed a smile towards Erik who was already staring at you in admiration.

“Uncle T!!!” Ashanti’s voice boomed throughout the apartment.

The 4 adults focused all their attention on the bouncing little girl that was sprinting for T’Challa. The man gave her a gap tooth grin as he threw her in the air and kissed her cheek. 

“Good morning, my umtshana omnandi! Did you sleep well?”

She nodded happily and greeted Nakia, who gave her a hug while she was in T’Challa’s arms. The little girl’s big brown eyes fell upon you , which caused them to widen with a twinkle in her eyes. You felt your heart rate pick up.

“Ms. Y/L/N? Why are you here this early?”

Shit. Why were you struggling with an explanation right now?

“Your father invited your favorite teacher to come out to breakfast with us! Now, let me help you get ready!” Nakia grabbed her from T’Challa’s arms and made a beeline for the bathroom. T’Challa looked between you and Erik with a raised eyebrow.

“Is she not aware of…”

Erik sighed, passing a hand over his face. “Uhhhh kinda? She knows we be hanging out a lot…”

“But doesn’t know I spend the night sometimes.” You finished sheepishly, looking away from T’Challa.

A wave of understanding took over his cousin’s face, causing him to grin in a goofy manner. Your eyes grew 3 times bigger and Erik chuckled at your reaction. You waved your hands vigorously. 

“I-I! No! I mean…uh…we sleep! We actually sleep! Nothing happened last night! 

“Yeah…nothing happened last night.”

You glared at your boyfriend who cackled some more and came around to give you a hug and kiss, which made you instantly forgive him. What was this man doing to you? You felt safe and loved. You haven’t felt that in years. Unbeknownst to you and Erik, his cousin was watching the interaction with a genuine smile on his face. He was happy for his cousin. The man who swore that after Ashanti’s mother left, he would never fall in love again and his heart was reserved for his daughter only.

Looks like he freed up some space for you.

When Nakia finished with Ashanti, the 4 adults and 1 child packed into T’Challa’s SUV    and drove to a breakfast spot that Erik suggested. It was delicious and you had fun learning more about Erik’s cousin and his fiancée. They were good people and they loved Ashanti as if she was their own child. You saw why he cherished them so much.

After Erik and T’Challa fought over the bill for a good 30 minutes, which T’Challa won, there was a decision to go to the park and let Ashanti play with other kids while the adults talked. There was a moment the other couple had to run to the car to retrieve their forgotten phones and your boyfriend squeezed your hand tight. 

“I’m sorry if I’ve made you uncomfortable with…you know…talking about…” Erik looked down shyly and you furrowed your eyebrows in confusion until it clicked what he was referring to. He was worried about you being offended by the mentions of sex before. You laughed at him, kissed the side of his temple, and spoke in a low voice.

“I’m just glad you clearly like having sex with me.” You smirked at Erik, causing him to grin widely, letting out a deep, sexy chuckle.

“I love it. Just like how I love you.” Erik pulled you in by your chin and pecked your lips softly.

“I love you too…cheesy ass.”

Erik gasped jokingly. “Miss Y/L/N is swearing?!”

“I think you’ve heard me swear plenty when we were-“

“Miss Y/L/N! Can you come push me on the swings, please?!” Ashanti ran up to you guys, out of breath and smiling wide. She tugged you by your arm before you fully got your “yes” out. You looked back at Erik who was still a little shocked by what you were about to say. You weren’t bothered by him. In fact, You were matching his energy. He liked it. So in response, he mouthed, “We gonna fuck.”

You finally made it to the swings with the little girl and pushed her, making her release the sweetest giggles. You found yourself following suit. You could get used to this. You didn’t really notice the mom next to you watching her child on the swing until she said something to you.

“Your child is so adorable!”

You felt your heart drop, but you pulled yourself together and gave the woman a smile. “Thank you so much. Your child is adorable as well.” 

You weren’t going to explain yourself to this random woman. It was better to lie.

“Thank you! He’s my stepson, but I love him like he’s my own. His name is Mason.” 

You felt shuddering in your chest. That was supposed to be…

You shook yourself out of it. “Her name is Ashanti.”

The lady’s smile dropped, which made you nervous. She glanced at you, Ashanti, then, you again. She narrowed her eyes. “Have I seen you before?” She glanced at Ashanti. “Or her? What school does she go to?” 

Before you could even answer, you felt a large hand grabbing your arm roughly. You looked back to your boyfriend with the angriest look you’ve ever seen. You gulped hard. Did you do something wrong? Why was he so mad? You looked over to see Nakia scooping Ashanti in her arms and walking away with T’Challa. Your confusion and fear grew more.

“Y/N, we’re leaving.”

You managed to utter something as he was dragging you away. “Erik, I-“

“Erik? Erik Stevens? Oh my God…” you could hear the woman speak before you were completely out of earshot. You were stunned at how rough Erik was being with you.

“Erik, what’s going on? Who is she?”

“Nobody. We have to go.” 

You did not like that answer. A surge of anger coursed through you and you yanked your arm away.

“Erik! Talk to me! Why are you so mad? What’s going on?! ANSWER ME!”

“THAT’S HER MOTHER! THAT WOMAN…” Erik took a deep breath, lowering his voice. “That’s…Ashanti’s mother.”

The oxygen in the air had disappeared when he spoke those words. You couldn’t move. You couldn’t speak.

That was her mother. Her real mother.

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[dross-the-fish]

Just pointing out that as a creator you do have some obligation to your audience. I notice a pattern with you where your responses are affectively "go find another artist" I find that dismissive of people who are upset about how you depict their beloved characters.

Your characters who aren't OCs belong to the fandom and the fandom has a right to correct you. Our comfort characters are not your toys. Artists of your caliber who also write aren't as common as you seem to think so it's not as easy as you think to "find another artist"

We came here for you. The least you can do is appreciate that. If everyone just left to "find another artist" your blog would be nothing. Have some fucking respect.

Ok, I've had a few asks like this and I've been mostly ignoring them but I think we need to have a conversation about "respect" since you're so concerned about it.

Most of the "criticism" I've gotten has been to the effect of "I believe Erik and Christine are in love," "I don't personally prefer your version of Hyde due to my subjective tastes" and "Adam is a helpless victim and Victor is evil," I've even had people complain that my design for Erik doesn't have enough hair. I don't think it's disrespectful of me to call these out as being shallow or based purely on preference rather than literary merit.

You're allowed to have these opinions and I'm allowed to disagree with you. And I do, I vehemently disagree with all of these. I have weighed and considered them and decided not to indulge them.

I'm not trying to be ungrateful but at this point my versions of these characters are my own creations and I have decided how much or how little I want them to deviate from canon. I'm sorry you don't feel like you can find another artist who's style you like but my work is what it is and I'm not changing it. People are either here because they enjoy what I make or they'll leave and if it happens one day that not a single person on tumblr enjoys what I make then I'll just delete this blog and I will go elsewhere to seek a new audience or maybe just stop sharing online all together.

I do appreciate everyone who is here and I think my regular followers and my mutuals are all lovely people that I enjoy seeing every day but people like you, anon, you make me feel like a vending machine that's getting kicked because I didn't stock the right candy. I know I'm also not the only artist on this platform who has been made to feel this way by people like you. I've known artists and writers who actively quit producing anything online because attitudes like yours made them lose their ability to enjoy sharing their creativity. So maybe you should consider having some fucking respect before you and everyone with your mindset drives creators off the platform.

[passionxwrites]

Best Thing (2)

Erik smirked to himself as he stalked away from the shapely woman fuming behind him. He knew that Noli could not stand to see him coming and honestly he didn’t give her a good first impression so he couldn’t be upset about her feelings. However, that didn’t stop him from picking with her just to get a reaction. Okay, he might have had a tiny crush on the woman….or a little more than a tiny crush. She was hard not to like and admire. She stood around 5'6 and was built like God took all of his time making sure she was perfect and don’t get him started on that southern charm she carried with her everywhere she went. That accent of hers drove him wild on more than one occasion. Erik never fathomed the thought of stepping a toe into Mississippi until he met her but he had to thank whoever was responsible for the ethereal creation that was Noli.

Shaking his head of the young woman Erik glanced at his phone and grimaced at the 30 missed calls from someone he never wanted to communicate with again, Angel. Yeah, more like Satan's reincarnate. Erik met the young woman at a Gala for the Outreach Center three months ago and she had become a thorn in his side. At first everything was fine until she began to pester him about getting into an official relationship. She even told him she had picked out a wedding ring and knew what she wanted to name their kids. The bitch was fucking crazy and after she began to tell her friends and family that he was thinking of proposing he knew he had to cut her off. The problem was that she did not want to back down and had been continuously been calling, texting, and showing up at his apartment.

Bzzz Bzzz Bzzz Erik's phone jolted awake in his hand with the familiar vibrations of a phone call incoming and he knew exactly who it was. "How may I help you Angel?" "Stop fucking ignoring me Erik! I know you see me calling you, stop playing this little game with me and just act right for once damn!" That was the one thing that always pissed him off about her. She was a fucking spoiled brat who was always used to getting everything she wanted because she came from a wealthy family. Her father was a a thriving business owner and had multiple five star restaurants all throughout Cali and had just opened a new one in Vegas. Her father was the reason she was even at the Gala that night because he brought her as plus one. Daddy's little hellhound wasn't required to have a job. "I'm not fucking playing with you. When we started this shit I told you what the fuck I was on and you agreed did you not," he gritted into the receiver as he had finally begun to reach a breaking point with her bullshit. He stood there for a second before he heard whimpering from the other line that eventually turned into full blown sobs. She sounds like a wounded dog. "Why are you doing this to me? I was a good woman to you, I even did that threesome you asked for and you can't even make me your girlfriend? Was I only a fuck toy to you," Her voice was getting louder and louder as she fired off questions and he could tell she was getting ready to blow but of course he had to light the final match to set her on fire. "Yes," and with that simple word he hung up knowing exactly what she was about to do which was more than likely send a string of messages filled with threats he had no fear of. With that out of his way he decided to finally take his shower since he had just come in from a jog when he noticed the package sitting outside of Noli's door and picked it up pretending it was left at his just so he could have an excuse to bother her. Call him childish but seeing her nose wrinkle up every time she was agitated with him was the cutest thing ever and he would bother her all day just to see it again and again. Simp ass nigga. He rolled his eyes at his own thoughts before he stepping into his shower with thoughts of his plans for the rest of his Saturday.

******

Okay, I know this is a little short, don’t kill me!! I just wanted to give an intro into both characters so we can start getting into the juicy stuff!! I hope you all like it.

[senditcolton]

Talk

a/n: i actually really love writing for EJ. so here’s some more of him! sort of a prequel to this blurb from my last birthday celebration. hope you all love sunshine/golden retriever EJ.  word count: 1.5k warnings: dirty talk + implied smut (basically the proposition of the act but not the act itself). feminine reader this time!

I won’t deny I’ve got in my mind now all the things I would do.

“Looking good, sweetheart.”

You hear EJ before you see him and your shoulders heave in a sigh as you cast an exasperated glance in Nate’s direction. You knew he was going to be here; it was Colorado’s charity brunch after all so of course the entire team was in attendance. But still, that didn’t mean that you had to interact with EJ.

At least, not right now.

So, you sigh again before spinning around in your chair, your eyes darting up to his face. And to your unfortunate surprise, he looked hot; in his casual suit, the top few buttons tastefully undone, his blonde hair artfully ruffled.

“Thank you, EJ,” you say, your voice dry, not at all willing to let him or anyone else sitting at your table know how much this man managed to fluster you.

You think that your forced politeness would be the end of it as you turn back to continue the conversation that you were having with Nate, your friend who was responsible for bringing you here. But you should’ve known that Erik wasn’t going to give up that easily and your body bristles when you feel him settle into the chair next to you, his voice sounding again.

“Woah, being nice to me? That’s a surprise,” he laughs. You roll your eyes in Nate’s direction, an action that was met with a scolding glance from your best friend, silently telling you to behave. Which you always do. EJ just never made it easy for you.

You turn back towards Erik, finally giving him your full attention and plaster on a smile before responding.

“We’re at a charity event. I gotta be on my best behavior.”

EJ doesn’t give you a verbal response at first, just shoots you that ridiculously goofy grin. The two of you back off each other for a moment, turning your attention to the delicious food in front of your and the conversation surrounding you. However, the peace only lasts a minute until you feel Erik lean over towards you, his voice quiet.

“I prefer you on your worst behavior.”

The way his voice drips with desire and passion makes you falter, almost dropping your fork. The glare you send in his direction does not discourage him. In fact, judging by that stupid smirk that remains on his face, it seems as if he actually enjoys it.

Which, after spending a few too many nights tangled in his sheets and in his arms, you know that was the truth.

Yes, you were sleeping with Erik. What started as an accident turned into a full-blown habit that you couldn’t seem to stop. Somehow, this obnoxious golden retriever of a man snuck his way into your life and it was now hard to shake him off.

Although, the two of you did promise that you would keep your ‘status’ quiet in front of your friends and the rest of the team. But here was EJ, flirting with you at a team sponsored event.

You swear you could throttle him.

In an attempt to settle your skipping heartbeat and ground yourself to the present moment, you turn your head, cracking your neck as you brush off his words, not wanting to encourage him anymore. Erik doesn’t take the hint and it isn’t long until you feel a strong hand land on your thigh, the warmth of his palm seeping into your skin through the fabric of your dress.

“I love how this dress looks on you,” Erik whispers again, his fingers caressing the silk. “I think I’d like it better if it was on my bedroom floor.”

You once again stiffen in your chair and glance around, eyes jumping between the others sitting at your table. Thankfully, they are distracted by their own conversations that no one has seemed to notice how close Erik has gotten to you. You are grateful for their ignorance, not only for the proximity of your bodies but also the undeniable rise that EJ’s words pull out of you.

“I wish I woke up with you in my arms this morning. We could’ve snuck in a quick fuck before we had to come here,” Erik continues, his hand moving higher on your thigh, calloused fingers dragging the soft material of your dress up.

“Or maybe we would’ve made up an excuse not to come so I could have spent all morning with my head between your thighs. You taste sweeter than anything on this table.”

There is no stopping the pounding of your heart and the rush of heat that pools as Erik’s hand slips underneath your skirt, his warm hands finally coming into contact with the soft skin of your inner thighs, lightly gripping the flesh as his hand continues to sneak closer to your aching core.

“Do you like the sound of that?” he questions, no doubt in response to the heat he can feel radiating from your center. “What if I just took you here, in front of all our friends? Let them know how weak you get for me. How loud you moan for me.”

You force yourself to suppress the full body shudder that runs through your body as Erik’s fingers just barely caress the edge of your underwear. Your thighs instinctively widen to give him more access and you hear the small chuckle that rumbles from him – a sound that you immediately want to smack out of him. He shouldn’t get the satisfaction of pulling this reaction from you.

Two can play at this game.

“You know I love hearing you,” EJ states, his fingers moving again to brush against the front of your core. “But you think you can stay silent for me now?”

Without thinking, one of your hands fly down to grip his wrist, halting his movements and lightly pushing him away from you, his hand retreating to rest on your upper thigh. You look over to him and when your eyes connect to his, you can see the question in his eyes and a twinge of guilt. The worry that he might have taken things too far is painted in his expression but you are quick to silence those fears with a mischievous grin of your own.

There was no hesitation from you when your other hand falls from the tabletop to land on his thigh, squeezing the strong muscle there and your smirk just widens when you hear the small gasp on EJ’s lips.

“Can you?” you ask, hand trailing up, following a very similar path as the one that Erik traced up your own thigh. “Don’t lie to me EJ. You try to act all suave and smooth but really, you just want me to drop to my knees in front of you.”

You can feel his grip on your own thigh tighten as your hand creeps up over the soft material of his dress pants. It isn’t long until your fingertips reach out to barely trace the side of his cock, half hard from both his teasing and yours.

“Does that turn you on baby? The idea of me looking up at you from the pretty tiled floor. You know it would be one way to keep me quiet. But if we were in that position, I don’t think I’d be the one who would struggle staying silent.”

Your words are almost instantly proven as you get bolder and place your hand over his bulge, softly palming him underneath the tablecloth and you smirk as you watch Erik disguise a moan as a cough, reaching out to take a drink of his water. You giggle, your own hand withdrawing to mirror his, resting heavy on the top of his upper thigh.

“Shall we see? Make it a contest? See which one of us can keep their composure at this beautiful charity event while we do the most sinful things in the bathroom?”

The proposal lingers there for a moment before the words truly register with EJ, his head whipping to face you and you can’t stop the genuine laugh that falls from your lips at the eagerness shining in his eyes.

“Are you serious?”

“Only if you are.”

You watch as Erik’s eyes register the sincerity in your words and those beautiful grey irises dart from your own down to your lips and back again.

“God, I really want to kiss you right now,” he whispers and you can’t stop your heart from softening at his gentle declaration. It is short-live though as the smile on your face twists again, returning to that playful smirk.

“Men’s room. 10 minutes. Then you can kiss me all you want.”  

EJ’s only response is another firm squeeze on your thigh before he is practically bounding out of his seat and you once again have to swallow a giggle at his obvious excitement. Your eyes follow his trek to the back hallway where the bathrooms were located.

You shake your head slightly, taking another drink and reorienting yourself to your surroundings. You make small talk with some of the others at the table before you are politely excusing yourself, your own desire rushing through your body as you follow Erik’s path.

This was a shit idea.

Didn’t stop you from wanting it though.

[izbelross]

Por la vida que soy libre

A/N: Welcome back my fellow strangers :D Yesterday I had a hell of a ride on this planet called Earth in a big place called Mexico. It. Was. Awesome. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this second chapter, that is actually the third part of this hopefully ten chapter series. Leave a comment, I'm always wanting to read what you think.

Warnings: violence (kinda explicit) / angst / triple pinning / Fratt being Fratt / fluffishness / panic attacks / swearing / bad words, really, really bad words ;) / reader being a lil' piece of shit (do not mind me, just putting my issues here)

Synopsis: everyone is born with a soulmate (a/n: wouldn't that be mental?) Soulmates can hear their thoughts since childhood, some others up until they're older. This connection only becomes stable when soulmates meet, but as it can be nourished to bloom into something solid it can also be stopped. Soulmates come with a free choice, you don't die without them, you can learn to live with the one of your choice, free will no matter what. Although those who chose their destined ones can coincide in one thing: "You could never regret it". But when you are raised like a puppet of violence, your free will in every aspect of your life seems to have never existed. Along with your chance of meeting the ones destined for you.

Prologue / Chapter 1 / Chapter 2

✨Taglist: @scoliobean @dusstory

Chapter 2

"Solo llorar no es bueno"

"Remember? We were so young back then, no worries, just you and me, me your ignorance that made everything else meaningless. Now look at us, you have gotten older, meanwhile I am here, the same as always, just not for you, baby."

.·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·

"Frank! Where are you!"

His lungs where burning with every jump and landing he made all around Hell's Kitchen, his eyes trying to focus, to gain a little more time to talk to Castle, hear him again wherever he was. "Frank!" Matt was a man that never really thought things thorough, half his choices were done in an instant, which gave him repercussions with time, losing friendships, losing lovers, losing support. All of those time he always felt the right choice was being made. The only truth was his and his only, no other way, no other options.

But we have already talked about destiny, remember?

After bolting out of the firm, with the nagging feeling on his head coming from Frank's mind, he almost goes mad with the amount of fear that blinded him. Castle was far, far away, and the obvious sound of water was the last sound that he received from the other man.

Daredevil came out then, for it wasn't enough for Matthew Murdock to handle losing someone else he cared for, someone he hasn't even had the chance to-

"Matt" Frank whisper almost making him drop to his knees in the middle of a landing, he had to stop himself to breath once, exhale, breath another time and exhale. His constricted lungs making the air travel up to his fogged mind. "Castle, where the fuck are you? What happened?"

"I got- someone attacked me, got rid of'em, so, it's 'kay."

Matt got up again and started running, Frank's voice only a whispered carried by the wind, but strong enough to tell him where his soulmate was. "I'm coming, stay there." Frank's short growling was his only response.

////////o.o////////

You forgot very soon about the weird lawyer and the strange feeling on your chest right after he bolted out the room, and apparently out of the rest of city. "How long?" You have asked Nelson "We will have to continue without him." He answered, and so, you signed the papers without Murdock and continued with your life like nothing had happened.

There was so much that could be done for the next part, with you searching for Erik and trying to reach contact with Charles without really getting anywhere near Canada, where you had a penalty of dead if ever set foot there again. Yelena had almost disappeared, no one of you knew why or where, but you really hoped she was okay.

Sharon was the only one that still held contact with you, from a biper without register on the internet data and the geolocalization from government trackers.

Seating cross ledge on the open field, your closed eyes moved behind your eyelids. You had been meditating for almost an entire week, four to six hours a day without breaks, it was the first safest option to try to speak with Charles.

So far it was being useless.

Back in your mind though you felt it again, a strange impulse to see, not with your eyes, but with that deep hidden part of you that knew you were needed somewhere. "Castle" you heard a murmur and in your state of catharsis the voice became clearer.

"... metal bender or some shit. On the first and second street, near the dumpster, he made the deal to give me his location."

"You can't go on this condition, we don't know what he's capable of and-"

"Red, I honestly don't give two shits about it! I've been hunting these assholes for a long time and I'm not gonna stop now!"

The loud voices made your skin turn warm, they weren't as near threatening but more a sad plea of help and understanding. A pain that got under every fiver and made your hands twitch, wanting to hold to whoever this was and embrace him forever.

"I know! You think I don't give a fuck about it! I care too! You are my soulmate too! I can feel your pain too! And I-" the sound of a groan came out of this softer voice. "I can't lose you, not like this. I know how much pain it gives you, but you can't keep doing this to yourself. I told you I'll help you hunt them down and that's what I'm doing-"

"Listen-"

"You listen here right now! Me helping you with them doesn't mean I'll just sit there and watch you rip yourself apart o let other do it! Do not ask that of me Castle, you know damn well I wouldn't and if it were you in my place, mhpff-"

The muffled sound of a moan flew to you, a private thing that your ears were witnessing and for some reason, it felt like the reason you were listening was because you had to be in this exact moment. And even more, you should be there, seeing with your eyes, your own ears, feeling their warmth that even only their voices could give you.

It felt like a dream, until like every other you woke up like a punch in your gut, the next words freezing your longing.

"Erik Lensherr is the last one of 'em, Red. I'll end him and then all'll be over."

Your eyes flew open. Concentration lost for a solid minute and even when you closed them again, trying with all your might to reach them, it was futile.

"Shit, shit, SHIT!"

Scrambling to your feet, you ran to the hotel you were staying it, the pressure of a really bad thing climbing to your bones.

/////////o.o/////////

"So now we're hunting a Castle and a Red?" Bucky asked while you waited for said men to appear, you didn't know when they were going to be here, or how much of a threat they were capable of, but the way Castle talked about the mutant told you enough to know he wasn't one. So instead of trying to dig for more info, like Sharon at right suggested, you took all your lest heavy weapons, took Bucky and Sharon, sending Sam as a snipper into one of the buildings and camped in the dumpster. After three days and two nights, Bucky was starting to get on your nerves.

"For the twenty fifth time, Barnes, yes, now shut up, please" Sharon answered. Looking through night-goggles. After a few seconds of silence with Bucky cleaning his weapon, she murmured your name softly. "I see two figures coming," you quickly took your own, focusing on the both silhouettes, one was barely lit by the moonlight, he was all clad in red, Red, and the other was bulkier and taller, Castle. "The red one stopped walking."

You didn't dare speak "Shit, that's Daredevil and The Punisher." Said Sam through the comms.

"You've worked with them before?" Sharon spoke, getting her ammo checked and unlocking her three guns. Bucky nodded, "Once, it was enough to know the man is a psycho and the other is no better." You gulped, you knew the reason why you have heard them, still you didn't acknowledge it, you didn't want to. If they were here for one of the most important people in your life, then it would only bring you pain. "They're close tho, they wanna hide it but, i think it's pretty obvious." He moved his chin, like signalling at them and there they were, moving like a unity, Castle kept his gun pointed slightly down, ready to shoot in a movement, and Daredevil kept a steady a few steps behind.

"They probably know we're here, you should go out." Sharon and you shared a look at Sam suggestion. "Daredevil has super hearing or somethin'"

"He's a mutant?"

"Nah, only an enhanced. That's what they told us at least."

"Let's go then." Murmured your blonde friend. You still didn't dare speak and instead opted to put on your mask and yellow goggles. "Why are you-?" You cut in before she could finish.

"Caution." The metallic voice coming through the vents of your mask would suffice. If the man used a mask, he could be any one, he would naturally detect your voice if you ever had had contact. And you weren't risking your privacy, didn't matter if they were your- your- "Ugh, let's go."

"Gentlemen, good night." Greeted Sharon, while coming two steps in front of Bucky and you, her hands relaxed at her side, close enough to grab at her guns, and you and the Soldier fanned behind her slowly, setting a perimeter to reach them as well.

The Punisher and Daredevil were defensive, muscles waiting at the least threat to set into attack mode. When the Devil talked you immediately recognised his voice. Matthew Murdock.

"Splendid time for a walk it seems." The phrase made for setting the contact with Frank's intel flew over all your heads.

"Not so much, sadly." Answered Bucky and in one blink of an eye The Punisher's guns, each in one hand was pointed towards Sharon and Bucky, a little insulting if you admit it, but it was an obvious reaction, they were the only ones with fire guns, yours were just a little less visible.

In automatic, Sharon and Bucky pointed to them as well and the little red dot from somewhere in the far buildings behind, found home at Castle's head. "You'll probably want to put that down, Castle." You spoke and if he or the Devil were surprised with you saying his name or whatever, they didn't show. "If they are already here," Frank thought, "it's probably obvious they know about our names as well."

"A pretty logic thinking, but that could back fire at us if we give away too much info." Whispered Matt to his soulmate's mind.

You looked at the way they stood there, unmoving, without answering. They are talking to each other. And so you decided to play a little, after all, you were trained by the beat liars in the world: If you want to lie, then you have to believe your own lies, they aren't as much but truths, truths you aren't trying to make believe but truths your are informing.

"What would they think of you if they saw you with him, Red?" You spoke and he turned his head a little, Frank's eyes glancing so fast to his partner that you would have missed it, but Sharon and yourself were pretty focused on every inch of reaction. She knew exactly what you were doing. "I don't think Page and Nelson would be so happy about you running around with a murderer."

Aaaand... there it was. Murdock's body stiffen and Castle's head turned to look at him directly.

"What are you doing here?" A smirk played in your lips, he didn't bite.

"Perhaps you don't care too much because, option one: You don't care about them, their reactions." Bucky didn't move at your side, he was probably hearing Sam's breathing, steady and grounding. "Which I doubt from what I've seen." Sharon's multitasking was perfect, pointing her guns at both men, following the chit chat, listening for threats. "Number two: They already know and don't give a shit because they love you." No reaction. "Number three: they've come with you."

Matt Murdock was an impulsive man, as we already know. So it was no surprise that his other face of the coin, the Devil, sometimes took his place to make things, no, not better. Actually worst. That's why he reacted the most stupid way he did.

Frank barely registered when his other stupid half ran straight towards Sharon, who didn't give two shits and shoot to his leg, leaving him screaming on the floor. Frank shoot her but didn't have in mind that you all had more technology from Tony –blessed Tony Stark wherever he is now– and as soon the bullets touched the invisible shield surrounding you, they flew backwards in every other direction.

Surprised filled Frank and terror soon stroked next, when Bucky shifted and shot him straight to his calf, bullet coming out, just like Sharon's bullet to Daredevil.

"Don't you dare touch him!" Screamed Murdock when you approached Frank. You stoped in your tracks and sent him an annoyed glare. "I'm not stupid, double D, calm your nipples."

You crouched down, away from Frank's trembling form and were met by his eyes trying to kill you. "Why are you here?"

"Tha's non of y'business." He answered, barely containing his pained groans.

"It is my business when someone wants to reach my boss." You said, firm pulse containing the lie. He only stared at you for a second but his gaze snapped towards Matt when he tried to move away from an approaching Bucky.

"I have to apply pressure in that leg. Or you'll bleed out." Bucky got closer to Murdock, with Sharon following behind every move. Still Matt didn't dare to speak and for what you could see, Castle was about to scream some more, this time at the soldier.

Murdock nodded one time and Bucky got into action, cleaning the affected area as fast as possible without doing more damage and applying the drying spry for the wound. "And who are they?" Asked the man in red, pointing to you and Sharon with his chin. Sharon didn't waver in pointing at Daredevil nor Castle, not even when Bucky send her a pointed look.

"We're the ones that will end you if you don't answer our questions, man." Replied Sharon.

"Sorry before hand, blonde." Said Murdock.

"Sorry about what?" Before any of you could say something else, Frank screamed "Cristianismo!" Leaving you all weirded out for a few seconds, until Sam spoke through the comms telling you that there were red dots on your backs.

"Well shit." You whispered.

In front of you, Bucky stood still, and you did the same when the voices of unknown people were heard from speakers all around the place.

For a moment Frank knew they were saved, this wasn't the first time someone had shoot them in what seemed a pretty civilised environment, he never imagined that people that used to be part of the avengers would ever wield a gun against someone, not even someone like them. He looked at you, like an unknown force that dare him to lay his eyes on you once, and then twice.

Your mask and yellow goggles didn't let him known for sure your features, not even your hair was visible, but the way you moved, the way you spoke, that was something that got his eye. However, the moment was lost when the voice he was expecting with such conviction, wasn't exactly the one he hoped to hear.

"Well, well, well... look what the fuck we got here."

Soon more red dots appeared in the heads of Castle and Matt, and yours and your friends. And so, a collective "Shit" was heard, it would have been comical, and if Wade was here for sure he would have laughed.

"When I told you to bring the party, Mr. Castle. This wasn't what I meant." A laugh was heard through the speakers and the "meow" of a cat. "Shh, darling, daddy's working. What was I saying? Ah! Yes, yes... yes..." Bucky and Sharon shared a look. In front of them, the injured men didn't move. "Bring my friends to me. Kill the others. Good bye, little flowers!"

"What!"

"Sam!"

"You fuckheads!"

Before the shots could be heard, Sam let go the eon bomb, stopping any kind of energy to run, so the comms turn off, the guns stopped working and the entire lights stopped working. Like about twenty people got out of seemingly nowhere, annoyed as hell, and Matt was the only one that could take notice of their exact spot.

"They are coming from all around us! You all need to leave!" He screamed at your team.

Bucky shared a short conversation with his soulmate, that soon turned into a rippled scream that told you and Sharon enough about what was going on in that building, away from all of you. "I need to go! I need to...!" He didn't even finished his sentence when you and Sharon started to run alongside him, leaving the men laying on the floor who were soon surrounded by their new "friend" and the hanging feeling on your chest that you did something very, very wrong.

But you ignored it, again, and followed your friends to help Sam.

The lights came back as you all were in the building, climbing the first fly of stairs. Outside of there, you couldn't pick a single sound, your forceful puffs of air while trying to get there on time not letting your ears get anything else but the thrumming of your head or the burning in your lungs.

"Sam!" Bucky threw himself through the door, watching his soulmate fighting five people on his own, without a second thought hi got into action and not even Sharon or you, that got there ten seconds after, were fast enough to help. Poor Sam was left standing there right about to punch another fellow that was grabbed by the neck and thrown across the room, the force cracking his skull on the wall and ending him just as fast.

"Wow." Whispered Sharon and you couldn't do anything else but nod with big doe eyes. So powerful was the love, that the heavy feeling from moments ago started to tug to you, like commanding you to go back outside, to help the men that surely were being drag now into a trap.

You were going mad, probably, you weren't a hundred percent sure, but when you realised the "I need to follow them" phrase came out of your mouth and stumbled through the door running down the stairs and jumping three at a time, you were already helping Castle and Murdock kick the shit out of the ten people left in there.

Both of them saw you running to help. But in very different ways. Frank was there, watching over the shoulder of the man he was literally kicking to death, you sprinting towards another that was pointing directly at Matt and how in one flying kick you broke his spine. The bullet flying in the opposite direction. You turned to look at him and Frank send you a nod, which you reciprocated.

Matthew was another story. He first heard you with clarity, like his ability to identify Frank's footsteps had suddenly expanded towards yours, with only meeting. Although he knew, he wasn't completely sure, but he had the suspicion that he had already heard the compass of your walking. After spotting you around them, he could smell your adrenaline, the sweat that clung to your body and the aroma that told him exactly who you were, and, for his own shame, his foot almost slipped with the revelation.

Like transported for a mili second, he was back on the day you were on his firm with the Soldiers. It was definitely you, and now he knew, he fucking knew for sure, Barnes and Wilson were two assholes that deserved to have a good ass kicking for shooting them both. And you for acting all so incapable of harming someone. Not like he wasn't doing the exact same thing but, you get the point.

"Castle! At your left!" The man followed your warning, dodging a punch with a metal bar that opened his chances to strike at his attacker and left him unconscious.

A couple more minutes after. The fight was over, leaving you three gasping for air and hurting in many places.

The mental fight began between Frank and Matt. Like always, there was the pull that dared them get closer. To get to help each other, care for each of their wounds in the gentle manner and un-judging way a soulmate can. First assessing in mentality, asking themselves if the were damaged beyond scraped, cuts or punches. But when their closed banter was starting, your voice shut them up inmeadiatly, lulling them instead into paying you close attention. Like dogs who are in the middle of being defensive and wanting to trust.

"You two look like shit." They didn't answer and you took that as a good sign. What are you doing down there, Y/N? You ignored Sam's voice through the comms. "I have medical supplies that can help you but first we need to get out of here."

"I assume you have more questions at hand, don't ya' sweetheart?" Frank took a step closer to you, at his side, the other man was a little unsure.

"Y/N?" Looking at Murdock you could only nod, Castle didn't look surprised. "Why? I mean-" he licked his lips, a question hanging heavy between you three. "I can tell you whatever you want to know if, only if you come with me. After all," your eyes settled in Castle's with a heaviness to them that his breath got stuck on his throat. "I have questions of my own, darling." His adan apple bobbed and you knew you had him right where you wanted.

You eyes twinkle with the knowledge that these men here, right there in front of you were probably trying to hunt down the most important man in your life, you were going to do whatever the shit was needed to stop them, even if you had to fight them, kill them and die trying.

But then... then you heard it.

"I don't like this, Red. They just shot us!" You could swear that the big man lips didn't move and you could swear that....

"HOLY SHIT!" You and Matthew flinched at the same time when he screamed, his almost always controlled voice getting louder and louder, both in your heads and in the outside.

"Did you just speak in my head!" Joining to his string of curses he took a step closer to you and even if he kept on murmuring obscenities no one could deny the look of amazement on his irises. "You are- are there, right there- here."

It felt weird. Not like finding something you have been searching for, not quite like it but close enough.

You were your entire everything before this moment. Like there was no other someone that was waiting for you or you were waiting for. The parts of you that were full, didn't suddenly got to make space for two split souls you just encounter, no, no. On the contrary, it's like you expanded, like the world you lived in, your little you suddenly decided that here, tight now, those two men right there were an extension of you.

A void that has never been a void. A void that is still a void ob blackness that is you, a darkness so deep that makes you what you are because it can mold, it can reflect the light that wants come inside it and make it its own and now, now there were two more voids that were, that are, to make you company.

"I can feel your head spiralling." Chuckled Murdock, just not out loud, and it was a different voice, something softer, something like silk that ran through your sensitive fibres, making your last cell purr in pure extasis. "Dear mother of fucking christ." Frank let out a loud laugh with your mumble that made an echo inside of you, waves that slowly formed with the deep sound of one of your soulmates.

"Welcome to the club."

For seconds that got longer and longer you three stood there, not knowing what to do but more so hearing each others rush of thoughts. The "And now what?" "What do we do?" "This is soooo fucked up."

Honestly you couldn't blame them, your own mind made you believe that you were dreaming, like your body was there but you were watching everything from the outside.

"I-" Murdock got interrupted by the sounds of many screeching cars near the place, the reality of the situation came crashing down again in all of you.

This wasn't the most preferably moment to have an encounter. "We have to move" whispered Frank on his head and there you went. The comms going off with the soft bump of someone crashing them and fear started to creep to you. You could hear both of the men in your head, telling you to keep running, even if you were ahead of them and they could barely stand on their not so healed legs.

Still, you didn't let on your speed, jumping over the fence even with the sudden gunshots going off all around you, lights that didn't quite reach any of you but that surely would have had if only you were slower.

You didn't went back to the point of encounter with your team, not daring to bring back more danger than was already ahead of them. Letting your chaser follow you to the deep forest far north of the place. "Cheers for American random forests" you thought. "Not time for joking, kid." Frank's mind answered to you.

You only kept running, to the thickest of the forest.

Looking to Frank getting a car engine started you thought in all the ways he could do the work faster. How he was making it all the more complicated way and how you knew different tactics for that, Castle only spared few quick glances at you, grunting low every now and then.

Matthew was far away, doing his god knows what, but for the newly connection his string of curses to the paperless toilet was pretty clear.

"Got it." The man in black finally got the engine purring steadily, "Hurry up before we leave you here, Red."

Not you nor him dare to glance at each other, he kept his gaze looking through the front glass and you through the copilot window.

You didn't know what you were doing. Going along with them and helping them buy stuff from the pharmacy was like playing to the fucking doll house. Many questions hanged from your mind, they were there and they could read them. Each one of them and yet, they all went ignored. Castle only looked at you in few occasions, not daring to share, not daring to ask.

Murdock just stood into his playful self of pure Daredevil. Joking once in a while and sassing you and Frank with every step you took. But behind all that you could sense that this wasn't new for them. Being defensive. Unattached.

It was a match were even if you happened to be a new player, knew the rules very well and followed them to the letter. After all, Yelena and Natasha and yourself used to be like this. Unapproachable but making believe the world mattered when in reality it was far from it.

And now this two men were like you were years ago. Before meeting and joining the Avengers. Emotionally constipated.

"What the fuck does that even mean?" Castle looked at you through the mirror, a hint of amusement in his tone. "Just speaking my mind, man. Can't even do that?" Snorting he looked away to an approaching Matt.

There was no point in stoping the conversation when Murdock entered the back seat, so you didn't dare not answer when Frank continued talking, "Your sisters?" A lump formed in your throat and he glanced at you briefly, an intensity heavy of understanding, even if it were only few seconds, for your damaged soul it was warm enough to lit a fire your years. "Yes"

That was the only thing you answered. Frank nodded and a quiet pat on your shoulder was given by Matt.

For the next half an hour no more words were exchanged, just images that flew past from them to you and vice versa.

"I thought we lost them!" You wheezed, Murdock hanging for dear life to the edge of a cliff, Frank panting at your side and like you grabbing the terrified hanging man from one arm to pull it towards yourselves.

Far away the crashing sound of the car still echoed all around the hills, a coming explosion throwing black smoke that would take time to evaporate away.

Matt was clutching your and Frank's hand, his eyes blinking, moving one side to another trying to make out your faces in all of the infernal world he was able to see. Your right hand clutched his t-shirt from the back and your forehead rested on his cheek, sending images of the ocean, the sound of the waves, the smell of the refreshing salty weather.

Frank's hand didn't let go of Murdock's but he didn't got close either, preferring to observe you both, a coming and going of soft reassurances and quiet terrified exhales. He had never been this touchy –if you could call that to holding the wrist of someone so hard to almost leave imprints– with anyone, not after Maria and more strange even, with Red. Knowing that you could someone, that the mere chance of it was about to happen a few seconds ago was enough to not let go of his hand and in exchange Matt gripped his even harder.

You could feel his eyes on you, so you took a peak over Matt's shoulder and there, Frank's little smile, without hesitancies, without awkward feelings.

A tenderness washed over you, this men were just as troubled, just as confused even after years of having each other. But you, you had that question still in you, that nagging part that didn't let your open perspective go over all the details, the changes that were already blooming.

You let yourself enjoy, just for a little bit more. A bittersweet memory of Matt's shaking figure and Frank's frantic eyes, the warmth enveloping your bones.

"Why were you searching for Erik Lensherr?"

The travel by car had come to a stop with said car falling of a cliff and exploding at the bottom. There was nothing left of the supplies, you could fantasise that you made it out of the way from the "secret friend" of Castle, the stupid prick of a soulmate that was now hanging from a post, his hands over his head, prickling from lost of blood.

It wasn't surprising that after trying to fight the men that got you against the edge of the mountain you wouldn't be able to over power them. Fighting five each and being to tired to go against the rest of them, almost like twenty more. More and more you try to grab sand in your fist, the more it slips between your fingers until everything went dark.

So here you were now, hanging from a post, the same way as Murdock and Castle, hands over head tied together and aching ribs.

They didn't need to look to deep into your mind to see the memories barely contained of your days with Erik, the good ones and some dark ones that you let slip. It was hard trying to block them out, but you were a fast learner.

Matt took a long breath and sighed tiredly, this wasn't going to end well. "I have very strong suspicions that your beloved Magneto helped in murdering my family." Frank locked eyes with you, a strong feeling behind them, something you knew very, very well.

Revenge.

But you couldn't believe such a thing, maybe a little, Erik after all used to have many enemies, and getting rid of them was a speciality of his but, you were there looking at Frank giving you the bomb of information that some stranger gave him. "How you know this friend of your isn't lying?"

Matt grumbled a little, his tied extremities starting to get itchy. "Probably should talk some other time." Nor you or Castle spared him a glance.

"I trust him, he had some pretty logical reasons." Even with five meters separating you from each other and the barely lit room you could see his eyes setting on stone, getting defensive. Squinting your eyes you didn't dare think about something else but what you were about to ask. "And that's it? You think that because someone know simple things about you that make them trust worth it?"

"They aren't simple things," Frank seethed through greeted teeth "And no one-" he looked at you, Lensherr was someone you cared about, someone you were right now defending, you. He didn't know you, he had never hoped but for life to give him a glimpse, a single second of being with his other soulmate even if it was just a glimpse through a crowd street and no more. Right now tho? He was starting to regret it, mainly because his soulmate was talking back at him in pos of one of the murderers of his family, his children, his wife.

Matt inclined his head, his brain starting to pound with the mental battle, the conclusions so fast running from one mind to another. The mask off his face only made it better for you and Frank to watch the worried barely contained expression, but it's not like any of you two would lose the staring battle.

"Are you defending him?" The words were spitted out his mouth, and it would have made you flinch, the anger behind them and the promise of something that probably would never get fixed. His heart got into a steady rhythm on his chest, like when he was calculating the perfect angle for shooting. You with your vulnerable position just like him and a lot of alone time but not enough time all in the same moment, just closed your mind, he didn't care. "What if I am?"

There it was.

Frank Castle rejoiced a few hours ago, when your connection got stable, when Red and him woke up first than you and he was able to look at your face ridden of that mask and glasses. A gorgeous sight even in the fucking cell they were. His chest wanted to have you close, the longing was there and he knew with a little more time, just like what happened with Red and him, you three would find a peace in your daily lives.

But he had forgotten about Erik Lensherr and the way you had pronounced his name, with a voice that had behind curiosity, caution, even fondness, and then the world was clear from the high of being reunited.

He shook his head, not believing, not wanting to believe, "You're not better than him."

Pain crushed your mind, a feeling not so foreign for you. Many times back in the red room they had tried to cut your connection, prolonging the mental pain and allowing the suffering to clean you from the bond that hadn't bloom at that time. It would have surprised you that he wouldn't dare to break the connection "Castle, stop right now, don't you fucking dare!" Matt revolved against the chains, his body wanting to get closer to his soulmate crying soul, both of you were lashing against each other and he wasn't sure if he agreed with you or him, he just couldn't .

Frank's lost had been –and still was– a wound that wouldn't close, it wasn't bleeding or infected. The pus had been cleaned and patched but the stitches would reopen every now and then, right after the anniversary of their deaths or when they encounter people left that knew about the most minimal detail, no matter how insignificant it was.

Now tho, he could feel again the blood going straight to his head not allowing him to think of anything beyond the rage, the misery and so before any of you could speak the door opened reviling him.

"What is this my eyes see? A hound? A wolf?" He looked at you, the incredulity shining in your eyes. For more than ten years you- you believed that- "A little kitten perhaps?" His white teeth were left in sight when he smiled, a face you recognised so well from the memories, from nightmares.

"(Y/n), look at me, look at me." The man in front of you continued talking, Frank's voice reaching your ears as well, his menacing tone but not quite understanding anything beyond this monster getting near you and the feeling of his cold hands on your face. "Focus on me, sweetheart, please, focus on my voice. I need you to breath." Matt was pleading, your memories going in all directions for him and Castle, the man still talking to him, to them, touching your face like a lover would and you there just unmoving, with the edge in your mind that got their ears with a numb noise, just like years before, when they knew about your existence.

It was maddening, seeing you there so close again, and they were unable to do anything.

Frank's rage went below the surface, his own pain coming back, the guilt of not being capable of helping in the right time. "Do not fucking touch them! I swear I would end your fucking life!"

Matt's hands buckled against the restrains, his wrists going lax and slowly trying on disarticulating his union with the thumb.

"Erik Lensherr!" Screamed Frank at the man in front of them and Matt stoped his movements looking at Frank like he had grown a second hand. "I am talking to you stupid fucker! Look at me!"

The man caressing your trembling form chuckled without no care he looked back at them. "What do you mean Erik Lensherr?" Asked Matt, not knowing the fuck was going on "Frank, that's not Erik Lensherr."

"Look at him! What do you mean-?" A piece of metal wrapped around his throat, or at least, that's what Frank felt, shutting up inmeadiatly and stretching his neck.

"This is a vision" screamed Matt, your head trying to comprehend and trying to even your breath "He's not real!"

"Dear Matty," an old voice that made his blood run cold came out of the man, Matt couldn't distinguish him, the unusual movement around him, the cackling fire not settling but forming a mass of savage oranges and furious reds. "You're still weak, caring too much, hanging onto useless feelings, kid."

"Well shit." You whispered, the spell of a nightmare going right against Murdock and Frank letting you breath and your mind to clean. "What are you?" You asked. Frank looked at you, too stunned to speak with the flow of memories from Red, you were barely resisting the urge to scream at the thing in front of you. "What are you?" You asked.

"Stick is dead, he is dead, he is dead." said Matt like a mantra, repeating it over and over until he could believe it, until the voice of the old man was lost to his ears and he focused instead on your voice, your questions, the fast beatings of Frank's heart. One of his hands was still on the tight grip of the handcuffs, the other aching and gripping hard to his still trapped wrist, he focused on that pain as well, better than the rage he felt for the last man he almost got to consider family and all the complicated relationship he build around them.

"I am simply a friend of yours that offers an answer for your questions." He spoke to Frank this time and again you couldn't believe that he was trusting this... this thing. "You wanted to know something, I happen to know what you seek for, but every knowledge has a price, what would you give me in return?"

"Don't you dare, Punisher, don't you fu-" your throat got caught by an imaginary metal as well, not that you were able to discern between them, for it felt to real.

Castle looked at you, both between the sword and wall and your warnings ringing high on his head, your whispered angry warnings on his mind "What do you want?" Matt's head moved in his direction and the bubbling anger just got deeper in you.

"I want... I want..." The copy of Erik sing sang, prolonging the vocals and getting nearer to Castle. "You'll have to give me something powerful and old, something strong, yes, yes..." taking a knife out his pocket, you and Matt bristled and screamed when he cut the vest covering Frank's chest. He didn't even care, only looking at the image of Erik in front of him, he didn't care when the bullet proof vest fell to the floor, or when the knife cut through his black clothing, showing his chest. "When you find it, when you take it. You'll bring it to me and your debt will be payed."

A heartbeat pass between your eyes boring into Frank's skull, his closed mind to you not letting the very furious words reach him and Matt's pleas for Frank to don't do it, not accept.

But even if he glanced at both of you he didn't dare refuse "Agreed." The monster in front of your eyes smiled at Frank while rapidly cutting an 'x' on his left pectoral, a hissing came out his mouth and suddenly the cuffs on his wrists and ankles weren't there anymore, letting him to fall to the floor clutching his newly mark chest and that monster disappeared between yours and Matt's swearings and worried screams.

Both of you fell hard to the floor, the room around you disappearing, the poles were no where in sight, the place turned into greens, and mountains and the smell of burning gas and you were again at the edge of the cliff, the car far below you and the sound of cars getting far away from you, through the forest road started to ground you.

For two minutes Matt and you were dumbfounded, "Son of a bitch!" You screamed. "It was an illusion" Murdock scrambled on his knees to you and took your face into his hands, it was rough, the movement of his fingers checking the places the monster touched you. Looking at him, you took his hands away from your face and both got up, running to Castle's whining form on the dirt.

His vest was on him, as well as his shirt but still he clutched his chest, sobbing in a terrible burn that was slowly fading.

With desperation he but tear away his vest and pull down the neckline of the black clothe.

You all sat there, flabbergasted racing hearts that didn't stop you from reaching out and roaming your fingers over the scar in form of an 'x', Frank looked at your hand, tracing the lines that should be hurting, following your arm with his eyes and finding your neck he checked from his spot that your neck wasn't hurt.

Then he looked at Matt, that had a hand on his right shoulder, wandering eyes focusing between him and you. "That was- it all..." his voice barely heard with the wind of the small mountain.

"Yeah." Matt answered.

The sound of an alarm startled you, your minds too tired to take precautions just turned at the forest behind your back and Frank's.

There sat like it was normal a smartphone. Left with the distinguishable tone of an alarm.

Matt got up and offered his hand to you, helping you on your feet while Frank ignored you two and walked to the device waiting for him.

Picking it up and turning off the alarm the screen had a text for image, "We have a deal, check notes, check documents."

"You are so fucked, Castle. I swear..." you murmured.

He was too occupied reading the notes with the date of delivering of what he promised and the place. And then documents with the next stop of Erik Lensherr, his weaknesses, his contacts, his past and his friends.

Frank looked at you, then at Matt a few steps ahead, poetically between you, "I'm not gonna stop 'til s'dead," you knew that, of course you knew, not even a few hours ago you met but his entire life wasn't going to change only because he had you or Matt. You looked at the man between you. His body stiff and surprisingly you heard Frank in your mind as well, reading as fast as he could, generally, through the pages and pages, photos.

"I can't let you hurt him."

" I know." He put the phone on his back pocket and walked to his vest on the floor, picking it up.

"I'll help you find him." You said while watching how he strapped it to his chest and how his hands trembled with your words.

Matt had a sense of deja vu, having being in your place a few weeks ago and for the fleeting cloud of uneasiness at Frank's mind, he knew he wasn't the only one.

Frank Castle stood on all his height, arms limp on each side of his body, rigid shoulders but with strangely soft eyes. "When I find him, I'm gonna kill'm"

You took a step forward, Murdock trying to keep a level headed thinking, not focusing on the many possibilities where you trying to save Lensherr leaded to Frank having to hurt you, or worst.

"I know."

[fallinallincurls]

first happy tumblrversary i'm so happy you're here and that we connected you're one of my best friends ever and i love talking with you and coming up with ideas 💗💘💓🌟👑 your writing is amazing and i have to request with ej (of course) the prompt "shut up" and they smirk and say "make me" BECAUSE WHAT'S MORE EJ THAN THAT?????

I LOVE YOU!! thank you so much & so happy to have you in my life as always!! <3 hope you like this and it lives up to the ej expectations (since you're the expert)!

we've got some 18+ themes here but nothing explicit!

"ej, we are not doing this here!" you exclaim, voice a hushed whisper as you try to push against his chest with no such luck of moving him. "your teammates and their families are downstairs. no way."

"that's never stopped us before. remember when we went home for christmas and my-" erik starts, that playful glint you know and love so much appears in his blue eyes.

"stop! i don't need to be reminded of the incident that happened in minnesota. that was bad enough and somehow we still got away with it. but this is different." you argue, pointing a finger at his chest as if to make a point. it doesn't work.

"how? this is our house. we can do whatever we want."

"there's little kids down there! linnea, lucas, bennett. we can't corrupt them, ej. that's terrible. and not for nothing, you aren't very quiet so facing the questions would be even worse."

"hey, you like it when i'm loud." ej fires back in a teasing tone, ignoring the rest of your argument as his large hands start traveling across your body. "last time i checked-"

"shut up." you say with a laugh. the words are practically an automatic response now that you're dating ej. you don't think you've ever said that phrase more than you have since being with him.

but you know what you just started. erik doesn't back down from challenges and now this isn't going to end anytime soon.

ej leans in closer to you with that ridiculous but charming smirk on full display across his lips. his fingers tighten on your hips, sending a wave of heat to your core and you try desperately to hold onto your stance of not letting this happen with guests here.

"make me." he murmurs, the tone of his voice full of challenge. those blue eyes are twinkling with mischief and when you hear the delightful sound of laughter mixed with the clinks of dishes and utensils from downstairs, you make a decision.

one that will definitely shut erik up.

"promise to be quiet?" the question surprises erik, who eagerly nods in response. he has no idea what's about to happen.

you lean in to kiss him, soft and tender with a little bit of need, and ej smiles against your lips. slowly, you let your hands wander and before he can really process it, you've sunk to your knees in front of him.

"ohmygod, babe."

"ah, gotta be a quiet, remember? in my experience, this is the best way to shut you up. only following through on what you said."

bre's three year tumblraversary!

[anime-kia]

Sleeping Beauty (Part 2)

Omg! Yes it is finally here! 2 years later I present to you, part 2 to Sleeping Beauty! I'm actually so excited for this, it took me so long, but I feel like I'm prepared to write it and keep the style that I started with. So enjoy!

Warnings: Violence, Smut

Relationship: Soulmates - King Erik x Reader

Weeks passed since Erik's last encounter with your dormant frame. He was tense, pacing around the throne room with heavy steps. The Dora, tribe leaders and servants watched him quietly as he dominated the room with his vexed aura.

It's not that he didn't succeed in his plan to embed spies in every nation and distribute vibranium across the globe. It was that pesky panther nagging at him in his dreams every single night.

She appeared to him in the ancestral plane, perched on a tree. Erik stood below, dressed in nothing, but his gold fanged necklace.

N'Jadaka, why are you so hesitant?

Fari was her name.

"What you talkin' about?" He regarded her with no respect, the irritation laced in his tone.

Have we not guided you enough?

We... The ancestors? Erik assumed.

"Guided me?"

You are intelligent, N'Jadaka. Whether you choose to use your cleverness or not, it is up to you. The she-panther leaped off of the tree and circled around the man.

He watched her with his eyes, never moving from his place in the tall grass.

Listen to your heart.

Erik's eyes narrowed at Fari.

Ever since coming to Wakanda, Erik felt as though everyone was treating him like he was a naive child. Constantly they would give him cliché advice or try to alter his well-thought out plans. Erik knew what he was doing, he didn't need anyones outside opinions.

Just mere hours ago, he had awoken from his slumber. Heavy eyes and a cloudy mind. Erik felt ill despite the heart-shaped herbs enhancing abilities, but a weak mind makes a weak man.

In his previous dream, Fari mentioned that he appeared smaller as if the large man had lost mass.

Though he didn't want to admit it, his clothing fitting him loosely was more than enough proof. Even his weight lifting seemed more rigid than normal.

This ailment only began to occur since he stopped visiting you.

Erik decided to visit the king's personal doctor.

"My king, this is not much of a physical problem." She explained, shifting a braid behind her small ear. "Nor is it something I can fix."

His dark eyes narrowed at her, as he did to the she-panther.

"Ain't that your job?" Erik gibed at the doe-eyed doctor.

Ignoring him, she proceeds, "Have you been to the ancestral plane lately?" He only nods hesitantly. "Then that means you are near your soulmate and you must find her quickly."

"Or?"

"Or you both will perish." She explained in a soft tone, avoiding his eyes.

He couldn't believe his ears. The king wanted to think she was fooling him, as was the servant girl, Anathi. But as he could feel himself grow more weak, choices were limited in believing what was true or false.

"Who am I?" Erik asked the members of the room. His pacing stopped, back facing them.

The princess was not there to list every one of his titles as she did on their first encounter.

"Hm?" He turned around, arms crossed over his scarred chest.

Everyone was afraid to speak up, expecting him to lash out as he'd usually do.

"You are the king." W'Kabi spoke up proudly, his wife eyeing him callously.

He chuckled, "Then why do I feel like y'all still not getting it? I ask questions and I get bullshit responses."

"My king, we are being very honest with you." Anathi had voiced.

"Lying would be pointless and would not benefit anyone." An elder added.

"Y'all keep giving me the runaround. I ask about that girl, and you're telling me shit about a fairy tail?" The volume of his voice grew.

Some of the members had rolled their eyes in secrecy.

It always came down to the sleeping girl. Maybe it was time they encouraged him to see if he was the real connection.

"Would you like to try and awaken her, King N'Jadaka?" One of the elders suggested.

Okoye almost stepped out of line to dismiss the proposal, silencing herself as she realized that sacrificing her position in protecting Wakanda would've been a grave mistake.

She had made a promise to T'Challa prior to his battle, that no matter what, he could entrust her to protect you regardless of his outcome. But what could she really do now?

Besides, a man like him could never be the one for you.

Why are you still hesitating, N'Jadaka? Fari had questioned him again in his slumber. What is it that is holding you back?

"If I knew I would tell you." He frowned at her.

You have always been a man of action.

"You don't know nothing about me."

I know a lot more than you think, Young Prince.

"I'm not a prince, I'm a king."

Oh?

The panther appeared much taller than him, as did the tall grass. Her golden eyes shined brightly, rivalling the moon.

Erik looked onto himself, a much smaller frame appearing before his very eyes.

"What did you-" He held his neck, shocked at the pre-pubescent voice that came from his throat.

It is not what I did, N'Jadaka. She leaped back into the tree, resting her head onto her paws. Time is ticking, Young Prince.

Erik rose out of his sleep in a cold sweat, glancing into the mirror to check that he wasn't the eight-year old boy from Oakland, but the man who he grew to be.

The bathroom tile was cold underneath his bare feet, but the hot water soothed his tense muscles. Fari's words ran through his mind as the water cascaded down his large frame.

He shook his head and chucked, intentionally she had called him a child without words.

Sneaky panther...

"I ain't a fuckin' kid no more." Erik silently spoke to himself.

Erik waltzed into the garden where the heart-shaped herb once grew, now replaced with other greens and flowers. Anathi was tending to a patch of peace lilies along side her grandmother.

"Yo." He called out, their attention turning onto him.

Anathi raised from her dirtied knees, dusting them off. "My King?"

"Follow me." Erik commanded, turning on heel his immediately. I hope you're watching me now, Fari.

The young girl's feet shuffled quickly towards the king, not wanting to anger him as he'd been so tense lately.

The walk was silent, she carefully watched Erik in case he were to try anything. Their strolls usually consisted of him nagging her, but this time he remained silent, dark eyes focused on the corridor ahead of him.

She couldn't be at ease because it felt as though he was still on guard, but he hadn't even glanced at the girl since leaving the garden.

Anathi had recognized the path he'd taken, one that lead to the room located underneath the sunroof.

His hands rested on the handles, pausing before looking over his shoulder. "You said a kiss should work, right?"

"Y-yes, your highness." She nodded, hands clasped together.

"You do realize what'll happen if it fails." He threatened with a low voice, almost a snarl.

Anathi bit her lower lip before nodding once again, "Y-yes."

An amused sound silently came from his throat before pulling on the golden handles. It was always like a fresh of breath air once the doors opened. The air was so pure, feeling like a hug to his nostrils when he inhaled.

As Erik approached, his eyes fell onto your frame, too appearing smaller and slightly frail. This time, the palace servants had your curls styled into flat twists, pinned up into a bun. One of their daughters had crafted a flower crown and laid it around your head.

Anathi had remained outside, planning on her escape. This could be her chance to have a possible head start in case all failed.

Erik gently ran the back of his hand down your face, the beating in his heart increased, and that nagging feeling that he would compare to a raging sea became calm.

This would finally be the moment of truth...

His deft fingers lifted your chin, bringing your lips closer to his until they had finally touched together.

It felt... like... nothing?

Not exactly sure why, but Erik had expected a feeling of electricity to shoot through his body. He had expected his soulmate to spring awake, deepening the kiss to solidify the truth. But this was real life, not a damn fairy tail.

It wasn't magical nor did it feel like anything truly happened. Your body still felt lifeless, but the beating of your heart indicated otherwise. Not even a little sound indicating that you were soon going to awaken was given to him.

What Erik wanted, Erik never got.

That made the man very angry. He slowly released and departed from you, fiery eyes looking onto Anathi whose knees were visibly shaking.

It didn't work...

The only three words replaying through his head as he aggressively approached the servant girl, fingers digging into her shoulder. She silently winced, wishing that she had ran as she had planned earlier.

They must take me for a joke.

He summoned another meeting calling everyone in.

You want something to laugh at, oh imma fuckin' give it to y'all.

By time they had arrived to the throne room, all members were there, silently watching as he dragged the girl and tossed her to the centre of the floor.

Her grandmother helplessly watched, fearing for her grandchild's life.

"Y'all like to tell lies, huh? That apart of Wakandan culture?" He accused, arms folded over his chest. "Hm? You like to make niggas look like idiots?"

The members were quiet, uncertain of what had happened.

"She still asleep!" Erik shouted loudly, some of the members had jolted.

"M-my king, we did not say that you were the chosen one." A woman from the river tribe reasoned. "Only the one who is the chosen shall know."

Erik's eyes cut sharply onto the woman, "What?" He seethed.

Her hands squeezed onto the man beside her, as the look in his eyes were terrifying.

This pent up rage was both confusing and extremely concerning to everyone. This woman he had never met before had driven his emotions through the roof, even more so than T'Challa had done.

Calm down, N'Jadaka. Fari counselled in his mind.

The king was terribly angry. I'll show you calm.

"I think we need some new rules." He declared, nodding. "A lie for a life? I think that's fair."

Still silent, the members had looks of disapproval. Not that Erik was looking for an outside opinion, he was sick of being lied to and played around with. Maybe they could try that with T'Challa, but whatever he decided, it was finite.

Erik approached Anathi, lifting her from the cold ground in one hand. Her breathing was constricted as his grasp around her neck was tight.

Smaller hands beat on his with no avail, her consciousness slowly slipping further and further away.

"This is what y'all want?! Huh?!" Erik taunted the horrified and helpless members.

Would you really kill a child, Young Prince?

Shut the fuck up! He wanted to scream at Fari.

No longer was he going to allow her to treat him like a child.

Tears streamed down Anathi's puffy cheeks, rolling onto his hand and between each finger. Quiet cries came from her grandmother who was being consoled by those around her.

Erik callously watched the life force being drained from the girl.

"Stop!" A new voice had emerged into the air.

Audible gasps flooded the room, Erik too was caught off guard, releasing Anathi to fall onto the ground.

He turned around, knees almost buckling at the sight in front of him.

"She lives." Okoye rejoiced with a rare smile on her face.

You stood there, staring at the new man you had never seen before, but oddly enough it felt as if you had known him for a much longer time than reality said.

He was the most beautiful man you had ever seen, standing tall and strong. Though he had one of your best friends in a vice grip, it was almost impossible to be truly angry at him.

The astounded look in his eyes captivated you, drawing you closer and closer.

Only mere moments ago were his eyes filled with wrath, something that you would never see.

Who is he?

Erik had stared you down, feeling frozen in time as you drew closer to not him, but the girl on the ground.

"Anathi, ingaba ulungile (are you alright)?" Your hands gently touched the young girl, disturbed by the bruise forming around her neck.

"Uvukile (you are awake)." She hoarsely voiced in amazement.

It hadn't felt that long for you personally, but it certainly was for those who were still staring at you in complete shock.

You stood up to get a better look at the stranger who had almost taken the poor girl's life, and for what?

"Ungubani (who are you)?" You sternly inquired, poking at his chest sharply.

A spark had zapped you, both of you recoiling.

Erik had received that fairy tail shock he was initially expecting, but what no one else expected was the smile that grew on his face for the first time ever, a genuine one. 

"So you are my soulmate?"

"And you are mine." Erik said.

It took a lot of time for him to explain his initial reason for coming to Wakanda, and how he had not expected to find his soulmate locked away and trapped under a spell.

"If you are king, then that must mean-"

Erik nodded.

This would be the hard part to explain, but whatever happens, soulmate bonds were strong and could never be broken.

Processing your emotions over T'Challa's death was both confusing and hard. You wanted to be upset, you wanted to cry, you wanted to be mad, but none of the emotions came to pass. 

Sure it had been a long time since you fell under the spell, but you certainly did not expect your Prince Charming to also be the new ruler and murderer of King T'Challa.

Weeks passed and Erik had spent his time courting and getting to know you. It was all incredibly flattering, but alas, T'Challa still ran through your mind.

He was suppose to marry you, and you would give him an heir.

But all was changed once this American man had stepped his foot onto the Wakanda soil.

Erik slept soundly in the large canopy bed, his large arms wrapped behind his head. You remained awake, thinking about the previous king, the princess and the queen.

Vengeance.

You pondered, soulmate bonds cannot be permanent. If I sever his ties to the earth, I can be set free.

A knife laid tucked underneath the bed.

It was now or never.

Without leaving the bed, your hand slid against the marble floor, feeling for the weapon. The sharp edge pricked your index finger slightly indicating its location, so you raise it from the floor cautiously.

The man remained fast asleep, as peaceful as ever.

Your legs went on either side of Erik, careful not to sit down on him, the knife was pointed straight to his heart. Tiny droplets of blood dripped from your finger and onto his chest.

If I really love T'Challa I will do this for him. 

One breath in and the knife went down swiftly, eyes closed.

The problem was, there was no separation of tissue, no splatter of blood, no pained groaned.

Your eyes had opened, staring into the ones that captivated you earlier. They were void of anger or fear, but rather filled with bewilderment.

His much stronger hands squeezed arounds yours softly, holding the knife mere millimetres from penetrating his chest.

His hips bucked, flipping you over, knocking the knife away. The positions had switched as he was now on top, trapping your hands above your head.

"Y-you killed him!" The outburst had come from you, breaking the silence.

Immediately knowing who this was about, Erik explained. "It was ritual combat, he agreed to the conditions."

There was no resentment in his tone, it was so delicate and caring.

"I loved him."

"Yes, you loved him. But honestly tell me now, do you still love him?"

"I do." A fast response, with no chance to think. It was a lie.

"Then why do you lie in this bed with me?" He questioned, eyes peering deep into yours. "Why does my heart beat so calmly when you're around?"

"That is only you." You argued.

"Every time I touch you, I feel something." He placed his hand just above your bosom. "I know you feel it too."

You did, just then too. The way he was looking at you only made you want him even more.

But T'Challa...

An unresolved battle persisted in your mind.

"You're the reason I can't show you all I can give. You still holding onto the nigga who couldn't even wake you up, baby."

Bottom lip pulled between teeth, you tried to look away, but could not.

"Do you love him?"

As much as you wanted to scream yes, it wouldn't happen. It was a lie.

Was it fear? Uncertainty?

"Why you so hesitant, (y/n)?" Erik was surprised to find himself asking you the same question Fari had asked him all that time ago.

Your eyes had looked away, confronting the situation felt like betrayal to T'Challa.

"If you don't want me, tell me to leave."

You could not.

You wanted him, needed him to be here with you.

"I ain't believe it at first, but this soulmate shit is real..."

"But T'Challa-"

"Did nothing..."

You stared at the king silently, resisting him would be next to impossible. The glow of the moon enhancing his features beautifully.

"Ask me to leave." He demanded once again.

"I-I can't... I need you."

Three words Erik was delighted to hear.

Your head lifted to capture his lips between yours. Suddenly nothing mattered anymore. Erik spread your hands apart, wrapping his fingers between yours to deepen the kiss. Your head rested back against the plush comforter, tingles coursing through each body. He detached for air, giving you the chance as well before claiming your soft lips again. He came in hungrier, more passionate than the first time, unclasping his fingers from your left hand and raising your neck.

His thick lips latched onto your neck, sucking against the skin. The warm scent of vanilla filled his nose pleasantly, the taste sweet against his tongue.

Moans escaped your mouth as he precisely worked his lips around your frame. Now resting above your breasts, Erik gazes into your eyes for approval, in which you granted him.

The long silk garment was removed from your body, revealing a pair breast and erect nipples waiting to be licked. His large hand grasps the right as his head moves to the left, latching onto it hungrily.

Your fingers run over his head, holding them as he skillfully attended to your breasts. Soft moans filled his ears, encouraging him to continue.

He detached, sliding down even further where a wet patch had exposed you.

A smirk graced his lips as he pealed the blue panties away from your body.

Erik positioned himself between your thighs, bending your legs up and over to allow him better access to your dripping core.

He trailed kisses on each thigh before placing one onto your centre. A shiver coursed through your body as he increased the intensity with his tongue.

Experience wouldn't even be the best word to describe his precision.

The moans that were leaving your body were no longer quiet and sultry, rather loud and desperate. Your fingers grabbed his dreads as his tongue continued its assault onto your clit. The further Erik pushed his tongue in, the louder your volume grew.

Pressure continuously built up inside of your core, and shortly after, you had released onto him. There was a lot, nothing that you were expecting.

"Damn, baby." He marvelled with a wet jaw. Erik stood up to remove his bottoms.

The monster growing in his pants sprung free, bobbing slightly and menacingly at you.

But suddenly you had realized something.

I'm a virgin...

Erik noticed the change in your eyes, it appeared more like fear than anything. And not the 'there's no way it's gonna fit' fear.

"What's wrong?"

"I... I've never done this before."

He chuckled, grateful that he would be your first. "That ain't no problem. I got you, baby."

Shyly nodding, you lie back down with a shaky breath. His hands hook underneath your knees, bending them towards your chest. He lubricates his member against your folds before coating it with a hand.

He watched you, watching him. "Don't tense up on me."

You nod again, watching him move closer until it poked at your entrance. A sharp exhale left your mouth as he pushed in slightly.

"Just breathe, you good." Erik coaxes you. Your hands find the bedsheets, nails digging firmly into them.

His member breached even deeper, causing a pained sound to leave your lips. He slows down, giving you time to adjust.

"O-okay, go." You stuttered, allowing him to fit the rest in.

He pressed down slowly but firmly, letting out a moan of his own.

"This shit so tight." He groaned in pleasure, bitting his lower lip.

Ocne he had bottomed, a spark coursed through both his and your veins. It felt as though an even deeper connection had been made, solidifying the meaning of soulmate bonds.

Erik's hips moved backward, removing some of the pressure off of your cervix, but it came back as soon as he moved again.

"Ungh- shit." You winced, trying to manage the strokes.

He continued a slow pace, just for you to adjust. It wasn't going to be a purely pleasurable experience, especially not for the first time, but it wasn't all painful either.

When you finally relaxed his pace increased, thrusts moving more efficiently in and out of you.

"N'Jadaka, ohhh!" You whimpered, eyes shut, body bouncing underneath him.

He admired you underneath the moonlight. Eyes closed, eyebrows narrowed, mouth ajar. The moans, your voice, all so pleasing to him.

She is beautiful.

His lips moved back onto your neck as he forced his hips against yours. Juices mixing with each other, adding to the sounds of heavy breathing and moaning.

Erik had you in multiple positions, each one causing a different sensation. He had you flat on your stomach, his feet planted on the ground, Erik had sloppily thrusted into you until the both of your climaxes were achieved.

Tears rested on your cheek, air flowed in and out heavily as your tried to catch your breath. Sore, but very satisfied.

He pulled you against his body. Sweat moistened your skins, and despite your fatigue, Erik looked ready for another round.

Had to be the effects of the heart-shaped herb.

The intense feeling in each body had finally settled steadily, a deeper connection had been formed and you both knew for certain that soulmate bonds were real. A man who came and caused an uproar brought both dark and light onto the Wakandan nation.

He brought your knuckles against his lips. "My queen, I am yours and you are mine."

"My king, and my soulmate." You contently responded, awaiting all that was to come in the near future.

I am so happy I finally finished part 2 (the final part) to Sleeping Beauty. It's literally been 2 years LOL!

I hope you enjoyed, especially for those who requested!

(Start/Finish: March 31 - April 1, 2020)

[harlowhockeystick]

hi dbf!ej angst era anon here… i attempted to give them somewhat of a happy ending but idk if i managed that i'm not good at writing groveling... hope you enjoy anyways!

you were nearly back at ejs place when you made a decision. he turned the radio off in a huff after it started playing some song he couldn’t stand instead of switching to a different station so you were left listening to the AC and traffic noise. at one point you were debating simply getting out at the next red light but that could lead to attention, something you wanted to avoid, so you decided against it. the thing between erik and you was never meant to be more than a casual summer fling, for him to feel young and for you to feel mature, but his actions made you feel like nothing but a dirty secret. you knew the two of you didn't have a future but that didn't mean you took his apathetic response lightly. you truly thought you meant just a little bit more to him than that.

his car came to a stop but you didn’t get out right away. erik must have because then he was knocking on your window, almost making you drop your phone. he just walked back into his house though so you reluctantly followed.

the mood was thoroughly ruined and erik must have felt the same since he just silently watched you gather your stuff. he didn’t even touch you on your way out. normally you weren’t able to leave his home without him pulling you back in, pressing a kiss against your lips or dragging you back to bed completely. all he did was say “text me when.”

you didn’t know if he meant text me when you want to fuck again or text me when you get your period so that i know i didn’t knock up my best friend’s daughter. it didn’t matter. you wouldn’t be texting him.

erik didn't text you either. it shouldn't make you this upset but you couldn't help but feel hurt. the fact that he didn't even try told you a lot about the type of relationship the two of you had.

your period came and for what must have been the first time in your life you were glad about the pain it brought.

what added insult to injury was the fact that erik still hung out with your dad. after that day you had taken to staying in your childhood bedroom in your parents house, isolating yourself from everyone and everything for a while in an attempt to rid yourself of any leftover affections. ideally you'd be back to normal by the time you'd have to head back to school and if not you could always try to drown them with cheap frat party liquor or smother them in the bed of a random guy. when you finally emerged from your cave to get some snacks and see if you could sneak a bottle of wine the last person you expected to see was erik, sitting in your living room and sharing a beer with your father like he had no worry in the world.

they hadn't noticed you and you almost turned around before you heard them talking about you. the audacity of him to ask your father how you’re doing. you had to listen to your father talk about your weird behavior and hiding from the world. had to listen to erik nod along and act like he wasn’t the cause for all of it. instead of listening any longer you just retreated back to your room without the food.

when somebody knocked on your door a while later you assumed it was your dad and just pretended to sleep so he would go away. instead erik quietly entered your room and closed the door behind him. you ignored him.

“i know you’re not really sleeping.”

you continued to ignore him.

“i told your dad.”

you couldn't ignore him after that. "what?!"

"i told your father about us. and that i fucked up. and that i'm going to fix it." he came closer to sit on your bed but he didn't reach out to touch you. "i'm going to fix it but i can't do that in secret."

"so you just told him?! are you insane?! do you have a death wish?!"

"he's not happy about the situation. he's not happy about the age difference of over a decade or the fact that i am his friend and you are his daughter. but ultimately you're an adult and he just wants for you to be happy. i want you to be happy and i want to do right by you."

he took your hand in his and for a moment it felt so unbelievably amazing to feel his touch again, to feel his skin against yours, before reality set in and you cursed yourself for feeling that way.

"i acted like a complete asshole and i want to make it up to you. you deserve somebody that will treat you right and i know i completely failed at that but could you give me another chance?"

THIS IS EVERYTHINGGGGGGGGGGG

[unitedbydevils]

A dressing room leakier than Old Trafford's roof: why fans must ignore the nonsense

Another day of drama for Manchester United. Another day of ridiculous media coverage because guess which club has the biggest news pull.. that's right, it's the (temporarily not so) mighty reds.

Unity is needed to fix our poor form, but I think an inquisition is needed to root out the leakers because it's boring. Years of shit being passed out from Carrington like it's a paper note in a classroom. Grow up.

Does Erik Ten Hag have favourites? Perhaps. Does this mean you should down tools? Absolutely not. The attitude here forgets several things:

You are an asset in of yourself. If you give up, other teams notice. This will lessen your value for a sale.

It also reduces your personal growth as a player. 6 months of not trying might have been the period where you level up your skill set and playstyle.

Football is a game of small margins. Anything less than your best could be the difference between a salvaged point and a painful defeat.

The rumoured leakers are obvious: Sancho, Maguire, McTominay, and maybe Donny Van de Beek (I doubt this last one). Henderson was also rumoured to be leaking before, as was Eric Bailly. Disgruntled players are the obvious suspects, and normally it's correct.

Roy Keane, seen here on Sky Sports, has the right take: players are failing to take responsibility for their poor performances, and are giving up too easily. Could ETH make better subs or quicker tactical changes? Sure. But it's his second season, having finished 3rd, won the League Cup, and reached the FA Cup final, all with Weghorst up front for crying out loud. Give the man a chance, believe in his plans. We can't keep cycling through managers. United will just be a graveyard for talent and a money pit.

The latest 'leak' or drama is about David De Gea's departure. People have short memories. He was a good goalkeeper, and kept United alive for many shitty seasons, but his last few years saw his shot stopping - the star attribute - fall off in terms of stats and success. This is an issue. Onana is a solid replacement for the keeping metrics, but with great feet to help play out from the back.

Our current form isn't derived from Onana playing badly. It's derived from an injured Varane showing the gulf of skill between him and Lindelof, and how important Varane is to getting the best out of Lissandro Martinez. Hence the need for Kim Min Jae in the summer.

Beyond that, Eriksen starting games at 31 with a heart condition. What the fuck. Casemiro looks overweight and slow and needs to be eased in to the season. Last year he played more games in the season than he EVER did at Madrid. Ever. They're playing though because Mount, Amrabat, Mainoo are all injured. All three would be playing if they were fit. They might all feature tomorrow versus Burnley, and they'll make a huge difference going forward.

The media is to blame as much as the players though. The Daily Mail published an article about Onana dropping his car keys. How is that journalism? The same goes for Samuel Luckhurst, seen above. There's a lot of stirring the pot to cause drama, to generate clicks.

The reality is that people shouldn't be taking the Manchester Evening News (M.E.N) seriously because they're clickbait these days. The death of local/regional news; clamouring for clicks and views rather than offering actual substance and building loyalty and respect.

United are in a rough spot, and perhaps this poor start means we fail to make the top 4 this season, but if - in the grand scheme of things - Ten Hag gets United playing the way he wants to then so be it. I want us fixed, and I'm willing to back this manager to get it done. If everyone was pulling the same way, trying, and it just wasn't working then fair dos, Erik might not be the man, but no. He hasn't had his preferred first XI. He hasn't had players properly trying. He's had issues with leaks, player insubordination, scandals off the field, and the takeover farse.

There are better managers, but I guarantee they cannot be arsed with United and the Glazers. Lets get behind Ten Hag, back his authority, lose the dregs and crybabies, and see what we can achieve with a committed squad of battlers and ballers. Up the reds.

[bigautomaton]

Entering a a very character focused fandom as a primarily landscape/scenery and creature focused artist feels like bringing in a leaf to class because you thought it was show and tell but it was actually parent career day

[caelumsnuff]

i want to hear your recent opinions ^O^

Thank you for soliciting my opinions lol

So! With the resurrection of the whole “making characters a certain race” discussion, I have had So Many Opinions about the entire situation.

I feel like a significant amount of people from both sides have come at the discussion in bad faith and that’s only caused more tension and halted any meaningful dialogue we could have been having from this whole thing. On one hand we have people who are rightfully suspicious about the entirety of someone’s cast being white/seemingly only making characters poc when they fit stereotypes associated with those races, and on the other hand we have people who did such a thing and refuse to analyze their own mannerisms.

To be very very clear: we are correct to be suspicious when white people do these things!!! But i think where many go wrong is walking into discussions having already let their suspicions turn into assumptions; if you show up to a discussion already having made up your mind about someone, you’re never going to get anywhere! You cannot have productive discussions whilst attacking another person for being racist when you don’t even know if they are actually a racist, they’re only ever going to go on the defensive. And you know, when you think someone may have a little bit of implicit bias, you want to actually get them to analyze and deconstruct those biases, not immediately get defensive and shut down criticism because they feel attacked.

And also, i think it's ridiculous that almost every single white person has just automatically ignored why we may be uncomfortable with a cast suspiciously missing any people of color, or only making characters of color when they seem to fit into stereotypes. They ask "why?" and then disregard any of our explanations. I understand when someone comes and accuses you of something you can end up feeling attacked, but as an adult it's your responsibility to 1) assess whether you're actually being attacked and if you're not, 2) whether or not their assumptions are true. If you want to be an anti-racist person, you should actually be analyzing the things you do that might be born of implicit bias instead of going "nope! not racist! therefore i am incapable of doing something racist!" because thats just blatantly false.

Theres so many reasons that someone could have made every character played by Erik white, the easiest of which being that Erik's white. People associate voices with faces sometimes, and we all know what that white guy looks like, his face is everywhere. I wouldn't be surprised if some people cannot imagine characters Erik voices as looking drastically different than him. The appearance of his characters are supposed to be for you to decide. I can imagine that for some people not being give a face to associate with a certain character they just automatically see Erik or someone who looks similarly.

I also find the idea of looking for representation from random artists in the fandom pretty iffy, especially when its from characters that are all voiced by a single white boy. Please please please, go find and support VAs and ASMRists who are actually POC instead of relying on fan-artists and a single white boy for representation.

All in all just.... treat each other kindly and with grace, do some introspection on your own subconscious actions and decisions, and stop spitting straight vitriol at one another because of something in a fucking boyfriend roleplay asmr fandom. Give others the benefit of the doubt, and give yourself the chance to grow and unlearn some things growing up in a racist society may have taught you.

[free-pool-trash]

happiness - peter maximoff

yay a new peter fic <3 i was feeling a little unmotivated for a few days (since our boy wasn’t in episode 8 at all :/) but im back 😎 although im back in school so i might be on and off for a while 😩✋🏻

!!!it’s not a songfic those lyrics at the start are just my inspo!!!

word count: 5k <3 😳

warnings: maybe swearing but i dont think so i cant remember, peter being sad, angst, but mostly fluff, WandaVision spoilers maybe??? I pretty much made up this plot so idk, endgame spoilers, reader was an avenger, kissing but it’s not graphic😽 probably some mistakes yk how it is

feedback is appreciated <3

tagging: @enchantedcruelsummer (should i make a peter maximoff taglist? let me know and I’ll do it)

masterlist

haunted by the look in my eyes that would’ve loved you for a lifetime

leave it all behind

& there is happiness

Loneliness had always been something that plagued him. That and a plethora of other negative emotions.

There wasn’t a day that went by where Peter Maximoff wasn’t made to feel like a loser. Admittedly, he’d never held himself to a high standard, he grew up thinking that he’d never fit in anywhere and eventually that thought mutated into a lifestyle as he began isolating himself from the world around him, either far too good or heartbreakingly not enough to be a part of that crowd.

He liked spending time with himself. Nobody else knew him the way he knew him, and still, he found nothing but an overwhelming hollow space where his deepest most important hopes, aspirations, dreams and self discoveries should have resided.

Peter had always put this feeling of exile down to the fact that he was a mutant, it was the most likely explanation, right?

It was only when he’d decided to join the X-Men that he finally came to the conclusion that maybe the rest of the world wasn’t the problem, nor was his mutation the problem, but that he himself was the problem. For even in a school full of people exactly like him he was still the same loser that he was in his mother’s basement.

And he was under no illusions that that was exactly what his teammates saw in him; nothing. No potential. Just a space holder to bring the numbers up.

Super speed was incredible. That’s how Peter acknowledged jobs well done, he praised his speed but never himself. He just saved Charles and Erik from a room full of armed guards? No that wasn’t him, that was simply his speed. He saved an entire mansion full of people from a potentially fatal explosion? Nothing special, Kurt probably could’ve done the same.

Forget all of the good deeds and saved lives because the bottom line of it all, to him at least, was that all he was good for was cheeky one liners and hopeless kleptomania.

His life took a turn for the worse when he found himself being mind controlled in an alternate universe. And even then, he was playing the part of someone that wasn’t him, the thought humbled him, reconnected him to his roots and reintroduced him to his life long philosophy that he’d never be anything more than a social pariah. Not even an alternate reality could accept him for who he was. There wasn’t a warm welcome and despite not knowing what was going on, the definition of “imposter” or the weirder, “recast”, still shot to kill.

He settled on the notion that he was an inter dimensional waste of space. At least in WestView he could be blissfully ignorant, let the real him be drowned mercilessly in favour of being an integral part of someone’s life- to feel important, even if it wasn’t real.

When WestView fell apart he was completely lost. In every sense of the word. In a new world with no way home and as it turned out, nobody was looking for him. Although he didn’t expect anyone to care, it still stung that nobody did. He always hoped that one day Erik would step up as a father figure for him, this; getting kidnapped and smuggled into a different dimension, seemed like the perfect moment for that epic father son moment, but it wouldn’t surprise Peter if his father has yet to notice his disappearance.

But then, seemingly out of nowhere, he came into contact with a beacon of hope. A guiding star that might possibly lead him to an existence consisting of something other than misery and self loathing.

It offered him a choice; return to being the self proclaimed loser he was known as or start fresh as someone new and mysterious, with first impressions yet to be made and conclusions about him yet to be drawn. Peter had known himself to be rash in the past, when it came to making decisions he had the tendency to act impulsively, never putting too much thought into how his decisions would affect his life in the long term. The choice before him now is no different, he knew exactly what he wanted going forward, however selfish the choice may have been, the second he realised it was an option his heart was set on it.

That previously mentioned beacon of hope arrived to him in the form of a girl, in the form of you. An ex-avenger and close friend of Wanda’s, you were hired by S.W.O.R.D to help them clean up the more ‘sensitive’ fallout that the fall of WestView brought about. Obviously, they were sticking you- the only other avenger with magik- on babysitting and rehabilitation rather than letting you go after your best friend who had gone completely off the rails. Having said that though, you didn’t want anyone else handling him.

You hadn’t watched WandaVision, nor were you even aware that any of it was going on until it had reached a boiling point and you got a call from Monica Rambeau, she’d begged you to come and wait on the edge of town while she went in and act as her eyes on the outside along with Jimmy Woo.

That’s where you stayed until the hex broke down.

As soon as the barrier came down the base you manned was overrun by an armada of terribly confused and distressed citizens, Monica and Wanda were not among them but in their places stumbled in Darcy and the man playing the role of Pietro.

Jimmy appointed himself to Darcy, who in all honesty seemed relatively unscathed by the situation while you made a beeline for the dirty blonde charading as your former, dead teammate.

Peter was, to put it simply, completely enthralled by you as soon as you’d strolled over to him and in the moment he’d put his almost magnetic attraction to you down to the fact that you were the first friendly face he’d seen upon breaking free of Agatha’s possession.

But one thing in particular struck him; you’d asked him his name. You hadn’t immediately assumed him to be some knock off Pietro, as everyone else had. You acknowledged that he had his own personal identity and despite how often he caught himself hating the person he was, he found that when it was torn away from him that he wanted it back. The simple question you posed gave him the opportunity to regain his identity.

“Peter. My name is Peter.” He answered you, almost unsure of himself and you found your interest in the man piqued even further.

He remembered with perfect clarity the way you’d offered him a grin, tilted your hand, extended your hand and said, “Well it’s nice to meet you, Peter. Come on, I’ll be your babysitter for the next while.” There was something about the way you’d laughed after saying the words and the slight, yet unmistakable, glint of mischief in your eyes that had him captivated from the get go.

With you came a whirlwind of new emotions. After only a few weeks of knowing you, Peter noticed he wasn’t as lonely as he had been back home. He didn’t hate himself half as much either, he wasn’t entirely free of self deprovative tendencies and maybe he never would be, but undoubtedly, he likes himself more in this world than he ever had in his last. He thanked you and your determination to make him “a functioning member of society” for that.

It didn’t feel belittling, the way you helped him. You hadn’t dragged him to your favourite mall every weekend just to taunt him about how he couldn’t stop himself from stealing something. Even the very first time, when he’d sped away from you and returned within a second adoring a pair of freshly stolen sunglasses. Your only reaction had been to laugh and casually place your hands on both sides of his face.

“At least remember to take the tag off next time, speedy.” You’d muttered, subtly pulling the tacky stickers off the arms of his shades. No, you weren’t dragging him sight seeing or forcing him to help you go clothes shopping because you thought he was a loser who needed reforming you were doing it because you were a true friend who wanted him to succeed.

The pair of you seemed like two peas in a pod. Which to be fair, you were. Peter Maximoff intrigued you in every sense of the word. He was new, quite literally other worldly, he was kind, he was funny, he was perfectly mischievous and completely wonderful.

What caught your eye the most was the way he held himself, as if he wasn’t entirely comfortable in his own skin. It became apparent to you that he lacked confidence with the phrases he usually tacked onto the ends of his sentences. When you’d invite him to hang out in the beginning his response would always be something along the lines of, “Sure. If you want me to.” But the excitable puppy dog eyes told you that he was dying for someone to want him to tag along some place.

There was a certain understanding between you. You were both more than accustomed with the harrowing feeling of being alone and even though you’d never exactly voiced those thoughts with each other, you couldn’t deny that his was a spirit kindred to your own and he felt it too.

Since the Avengers has disbanded, one of your best friends, Natasha, was dead and your other best friend, Wanda, was gone completely off the rails and the people chasing her wouldn’t let you anywhere near her or even attempt to help pull her out of her darkness. You were being kept as a wildcard in case they needed her taken down. Peter was no stranger to the feeling of being cast aside and so he quickly responded to your frustrations, and in doing so, forced himself out of his comfort zone to be there for you. To his complete shock though, you’d been so appreciative of his efforts.

You never failed to thank him for the little things he did for you, always complimenting his mutation when he’d use it and giving him the recognition he never received at home. The friendship he formed with you was so… two sided, again, something he wasn’t accustomed to before. It didn’t involve him giving everything he had to offer and receiving nothing in return, you matched his energy meticulously and never left him hanging.

In a series of firsts, he didn’t wonder whether or not you genuinely liked him, never feeling the need or want to question it as you’d left him with no reason to doubt.

As he walked around the mall with you now, his mind brought his attention back to the question you’d asked him rather casually a few nights ago. You were both lounging on your couch, watching some ridiculous reality show (a favourite of yours and Peter’s) when you’d turned your head to look at him, a thoughtful look on your face. “Do you think when S.W.O.R.D figures the technology out to crack into other realities, you’ll go back to yours?”

The question had taken him aback for a second, in all honesty, he hadn’t thought about going home, not when he was with you at least and considering he’d become your roommate about three weeks after he got out of WestView, the thought of returning to his old life had barely crossed his mind.

Being an ex-Avenger you were fairly well off, you lived alone in a two bedroom apartment in New York that you’d bought to be closer to Stark tower. Peter had nowhere to go and aside from having a spare room to offer you’d also been sort of lost in the current of the busy city with everyone you once loved in the area either dead, on the run or busy elsewhere.

While the question hadn’t crossed Peter’s mind, it had crossed yours on several occasions. He’d been staying with you for six months and the moment you realised that he was becoming one of the most important people in your life, the thought of him leaving you too weighed on your mind but at the end of the day you wanted him to feel happy. He deserved to feel happy and if going back to his reality brought him that happiness then you’d support him.

“Dunno,” he’d replied, turning to face you, chucking a handful of popcorn at you when you looked incredulous at his response, “To be honest I haven’t really thought about it, m’way too busy babysitting you anyway.” He joked, effortlessly dodging the few pieces of popcorn you attempted to throw at him.

For the last few nights, the question haunted him, but it wasn’t just the question that was bothering him. You were at the forefront of his mind as he replayed the past six months of his life which also happened to be the best six months of his life. WestView put him through hell but coming out the other side of it and meeting you felt like heaven.

He weighed up the pros and cons of returning to his native timeline. The cons: he’d have to leave you behind, he’d go back to being the loser who nobody took seriously, his talents would be downplayed and disregarded and he’d inevitably end up revisiting his lifestyle of solitude. Then there was the pros: he’d get to reunite with his pac man machine. He couldn’t manage to think up anything else.

If he stayed he’d have everything he ever wanted and needed. You’d be there and he knew you always would be, besides he couldn’t leave you knowing that you needed him. If he left who would wake you up when you had night terrors about the catastrophe that your reality was still recovering from? There would be nobody there to comfort you when you woke up from the nightmares, reliving the deaths of Natasha, Tony or Vision and the experience of being snapped out of existence? If he wasn’t there to make you laugh when you were about to cry then who would be? In his heart of hearts he knew you had a huge support system at your disposal, he’d met most of them. Even though he was well aware that Sam visited you as often as he could, that Bucky wrote you letters on a monthly basis and sometimes tagged along with Sam on his visits, that Stephen Strange appeared in your apartment whenever the urge struck him, that the literal god of thunder invited you out for beer whenever he was visiting Earth, that the little spider-kid, also named Peter, swung by your apartment at least once a week to tell you all about school and his good deeds. Despite knowing all of this and knowing all of these people loved you dearly, Peter wanted to be your main source of support, he didn’t want to be someone who came and went, who’d love you then leave you. He wanted to be with you through anything and everything and the feeling that you’d love him for a lifetime had him satisfied with the decision he was about to make.

If leaving his old life meant he could stay here, with you, and experience happiness for more than a fleeting moment then he’d simply; leave it all behind.

“I’ve been thinking about what you asked me the other night.” He spoke through a mouthful of curly fries. You were sitting in the food court of the mall when he decided to let you in on his desire to stay with you indefinitely.

You raised your eyebrow, “You? Putting thought into an answer? Peter, I think I’m starting to become a bad influence on you.” You told him teasingly, taking a long sip of your drink as he rolled his eyes humorously.

“You’re a terrible influence which is exactly why I’ve decided to stay here and put you on the straight and narrow.” The glee you felt at his statement was undeniable, your eyes lit up and your lips curled upwards.

“You’re staying? Really staying?” Your smile was contagious, Peter’s face now painted with a wide grin as he nodded his head.

In a moment of weakness he frantically added, “Y’know only if you want me to though. If you don’t that’s completely cool.” He rushed through the words, feeling more embarrassed when the fond look on your face never faded.

“Of course I want you to stay. You mean a lot to me.” You reassured him, a gentle smile on your lips as you reached across the metal table, intertwining your fingers with his.

Peter squeezed your hand gratefully, holding it in his grasp securely and allowing his smile to return to his face, “I know. You mean a lot to me too.” It was somewhat of an understatement, he was starting to understand that you didn’t just mean a lot, but that you meant everything.

His resolution lifted a huge weight off your shoulders that you wouldn’t be losing yet another best friend. You were glad he’d be with you when everything blew over with Wanda, the two of them definitely had the potential to develop a beautiful sibling relationship and they both deserved that. Of course, Peter would never replace Pietro and having known them both it was obvious just how different the two men were, the only thing they had in common being their powers and last name. Still, he and Wanda would still be able to work on it. He didn’t hate her after WestView and you knew Wanda well enough to know that she was kind hearted and she’d be more than willing to give him a chance. When she eventually comes back to her senses, that it.

As the months went on, life with you and Peter seemed to only get better. You never stopped laughing, your nightmares died down and Peter had taken on a whole new lease of life. Yourself and Peter were the perfect example of meeting the right person at the right time, you balanced each other out and accentuated the other’s good qualities.

Peter could now say with complete confidence that he was happy and what’s more is that he was finally sure that he was making someone happy.

Up until nearly eleven months of living together your relationship had been purely platonic, save for the constant flirting but flirtation pretty much ran in yours and Peter’s blood. Peter wasn’t going to lie to himself, he’d fallen for you the second you’d peeled the security tags off his stolen sunglasses.

You, on the other hand, had been fighting with yourself because yes, you love Peter but you couldn’t have told him when there was the possibility he’d eventually leave and now so much time has passed and you’ve got such a good thing going you didn’t have it in you to ruin it.

However, all of that changed when your original Maximoff best friend came knocking on your door.

Wanda was on the run. She’d caused an amazing amount of chaos but Stephen Strange and S.W.O.R.D were hot on her trail and now she needed a place to lay low with the twins. She figured there was no place more reliable to go than to the always open arms of her best friend, who conveniently had a divinity for earth magik and could muster up a protective barrier without raising suspicions. And that’s exactly where she found herself; outside your door.

You’d been chasing Peter around the apartment when you heard the knock on the door. Peter was on the opposite end of the kitchen to you, using the bar as a shield from you. “You better get that.”

“Oh you’d like that wouldn’t you?” You glared as you spoke, it was his own fault really. What sort of idiot jumpscares a witch while she’s mid-meditation? He’d frightened you so badly you accidentally blasted a ball of your signature green energy and ruined your favourite couch throw pillow. When you were ready to pounce on the scared speedster the knocks sounded again, more frantic this time.

With one last glare towards Peter you stomped towards the door. Your anger melted away completely when you saw her. Her hood was up and she looked completely exhausted, two small hooded little boys by her side.

“Wanda…” You breathed out, relief flooding your system at the sight of her alive. She didn’t get a chance to speak before your arms were pulling her against you tightly, hugging her as if your life depended on it. Wanda returned in your embrace, allowing herself to relax for the first time in nearly a year, she sniffled against your shoulder, holding back tears as she realised how much she’d truly missed you.

Billy and Tommy watched in confusion as their mother cried into your shoulder. They didn’t know who you were, all their mother had told them was that they were going somewhere safe.

It was the yell of one of the boys that caused you and Wanda to separate, “Uncle P!” With that you felt a familiar rush of air across your leg but instead of Peter appearing one of the kids was gone.

You shared a perplexed look with Wanda, although your confusion was for different reasons.

“Hey hell raisers!” Peter responded, catching the mini speedster who all but threw himself at him barely regaining his balance before the other child had flung himself into the hug.

“Wanda? Those two… are they...?” You started, at a loss for words Wanda cut you off quietly, her tone as disbelieving as yours.

“My children? Yes. Is that…?” You nodded your head numbly, anticipating the end of her question.

“Your fake brother? Yeah.” Quickly, you realised you and a wanted woman catching up with the door wide open wasn’t ideal and you ushered Wanda inside, shutting the door when she walked in.

“Hey.” Peter greeted her simply, as if he hadn’t been used as a meat puppet in her altered reality. It wasn’t in his nature to hold any grudges.

“Hi?” Wanda replied, her voice still twinged with confusion.

“Peter, will you keep an eye on the kids for a bit? Wanda and I have some catching up to do.” You asked him with a nervous laugh, just thankful that Wanda was too tired to argue with your suggestion.

Peter ruffled the boys’ hair and gave you a grin, “Only if you stop trying to kill me.”

You rolled your eyes as you began to lead Wanda into your bedroom, “You’re on probation, jerk.” You called over your shoulder.

Once you were securely in your bedroom, the door locked and sitting comfortably you fixed Wanda with an amused look, “I’d ask you what’s new but I’m not sure I even wanna know.”

Wanda gave you a sad smile while she shook her head, “No, you probably don’t. I will tell you tomorrow, I don’t want to get into it tonight. I’m so tired.” She admitted, her voice overcome with sadness.

“I’ll pump up the air mattress and you and the boys can sleep in here for however long you need. I’d offer you the spare room but that’s where Peter’s been staying and I don’t think empty food containers are the kind of decor you’d be into.” Wanda nodded, squeezing your hand gratefully.

“So his name is Peter?” She asked, curious about the man Agatha had used to trick her in WestView.

You nodded in confirmation, “Yeah. Peter Maximoff, actually.”

Wanda’s brows came to a furrow at that, “Maximoff? So he’s a relation?”

“Yes and no. Peter is from a different reality but he’s still a Maximoff and he’s got super speed. So, and this is just my theory, while you’re not directly related he could still be your brother- if you wanted him to.” You explained, as gently as you could, not trying to push her too far but to nudge the idea in her direction.

Wanda, to your surprise, didn't seem to hate the suggestion, “What is he like?”

A genuine smile made it onto your face then, as you shot into your description of your roommate, “He’s caring, funny, a little bit of a kleptomaniac but he’s working on it. He’s understanding and moronically selfless, moronic in the sense that he doesn’t even realise he’s being selfless. Huge pain in the ass too.” Wanda had a soft smile on her face by the time you’d finished.

“You like him.” Was all she said and you let out a laugh in disbelief, standing up and opening the door.

“Go grab a shower. I’ll have Peter blow up the air mattress while I go introduce myself to my god sons.”

“I thought you’d at least wait until I actually asked you.” Wanda laughed as you walked out of the room.

Things moved fairly quickly after that. As promised you introduced yourself to Billy and Tommy as their god mother, which they seemed more than thrilled about and you assumed that excitement had to do with whatever description of you Peter had given them. Wanda and the twins were all cleaned and fed and had all but collapsed into bed, foregoing the air mattress and huddling together in your double bed instead.

“Where are you sleeping, mother Teresa?” Peter teased as he noticed your eyes drooping where you stood.

“On the couch probably. Or the air mattress.” You mumbled, cutting yourself off with a yawn.

Peter, unimpressed with your options, scoffed, “No way. Come on, you can bunk with me.”

Much like Wanda, you were too tired to argue and you let Peter pull you to his, surprisingly clean, room by the hand.

You both crawled into the bed, lying close together despite the amount of empty space on the mattress.

“How are you feeling about all of this?” Your soft voice broke through the silence and Peter turned his head to look at you.

“About Wanda?” You nodded your head, watching him intently as he rolled onto his side, facing you more comfortably.

Peter shrugged lightly, “I’m feeling ok. Just glad the twins still see me as their cool uncle.” You let out a small laugh at his response.

“Wanda was asking about you. Seemed interested in getting to know the real you.” You informed him, your heartwarming as you watched a hopeful look fall across his face.

A lull settled over the room once again and Peter caught himself staring at you. His eyes drifted over every visible part of you, reminding him of most of the points on his pros list for staying in your universe; your eyes, your lashes, your nose, your lips, you.

“What’re you thinking about?” The sound of your tired voice pulled him out of his thoughts and ultimately pushed him to bite the bullet and tell you how he’s feeling. With you curled up beside him, in his bed, fighting sleep just to stay in his company for as long as you could; he knew there would be no better time.

“Just about how happy I am to be here with you.” He answered you honestly, the butterflies in both of your stomachs fluttering in sync at his words.

You trailed a hand under the duvet and onto the bedsheets between your bodies, feeling around until you found his hand and gently intertwined your fingers. “I’m happy you decided to stay.”

“What you’ve all gone through in this timeline sucks- don’t get me wrong-“ Peter started sincerely, scooting closer to you and dropping his head back down on the edge of your pillow, leaving the pair of you practically nose to nose as he went on.

“And I hate that Wanda had to go through so much… but I’m really glad that it led me to you.” Peter swore in that moment, right after the confession left his mouth, that he could die right now and be completely content knowing that you now knew how he felt.

His heart stopped, and he thought that maybe he was about to die, when you gave him the softest, sweetest smile he’d ever been on the receiving end of and whispered, “I feel the same.”

Time moved in slow motion as he felt you moving your intertwined hands towards your lips, your lips pressed gently against the back of Peter’s hand before you brought them to rest against your chest.

It was a fact to say that Peter Maximoff had never felt intimacy quite like this before. But, experiencing it now, with you, led him to wonder how he’d ever survived without it. He wasn’t sure whether it was natural to crave more, especially when the affection you were showing him was so gentle, but he didn’t care as he let the impulsive side of him take over.

Not sparing another word, Peter closed the small distance between your lips and his. His free hand cupped your jaw while yours wasted no time in getting tangled in his silver hair.

His lips moved softly and surprisingly slowly over yours and he savoured the feeling of your hand holding his while your other got lost in his hair, your body pressed up against him, the way your jaw moved against his palm as you reciprocated the movement of his lips and the taste of your lips, promising himself he’d never let the memory slip from his mind for as long as he lived.

With complete clarity, Peter could say he had felt true, genuine happiness and he had no doubt in his mind that there was absolutely nothing Charles, Hank, Scott or anyone else from his original timeline could say to make him leave this happiness behind. Because in the process of forgetting his old life, he couldn’t deny that he has undoubtedly found himself in the position of a man who had so much more to live for.

[textsfromthefifthbasement]

Hey, @brbdaly​, maybe don’t reblog this post while you’re supporting a blacklist full of POCs managed by another white person?

You, as a white person, have ignored, silenced, and talked over POCs in the Phantom of the Opera fandom for too long. You prize yourself on elevating marginalized identities but only listen to the POCs YOU deem worthy of listening to, so maybe I shouldn’t be surprised that you supported a list determining which marginalized identities are worth listening to. Rest is under cut as this is a long post.

This blacklist was originally created by phandombigotryarchive, who disproportionally targeted POCs who disagreed with her and her methods. She is no longer active in the fandom but is happy repeatedly posting pictures of Asian women in sexy poses over on her other main. It was later promoted by asianphancollective, whose explicit goal was to send targeted harassment against other Asian fans. Now, it’s managed entirely by trans-flint aka cefantomeenhabitnoir aka so many other shell accounts I’m not even going to name them all.

Trans-flint. A white person. Like you.

Yeah sorry, white people piling on POCs for woke points is about the farthest from anti-racist activism you can get.

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That’s fucking rich coming from someone who actively refused to listen to people discussing anti-Asian racism. @helloitskrispy​, an Asian person, reached out to you about the anti-Asian racism being perpetuated by phandombigotryarchive, asianphancollective, and trans-flint. Your response was that it was an intracommunity issue, and that Asian people should be listening to the Asians who supported phandombigotryarchive. AKA your two Asian friends.

White people stop using “I have a ___ friend” as an excuse challenge 2021.

Anyways.

Then you turned around and wrote/reblogged these immediately after ignoring Asian voices:

You DO realize that we can talk about anti-Asian racism while addressing antiblackness, right? But then we’d have to look at the inconvenient truth that the people you supported throughout these callouts, phandombigotryarchive and trans-flint, are not Asian while accusing literal Asian people of orientalism. Phandombigotryarchive herself wrote that Pharoga shippers (people who ship Erik/the Phantom and the Daroga) have avoidance of confrontation “in their blood.”

Most Pharoga shippers are Asian.

You’d think it would stop there but. You reblogged this on February 28, 2021:

Not a problem! Anti-racism resources are great to share! And then a day later, another Asian phan, @phannah--montana​, reblogged this same post.

That earned her a callout post.

So, let me get this straight, it’s alright for a white person to reblog anti-racism resources but not a literal POC. Gotcha. How progressive.

You want to be seen as a champion of marginalized identities. You want to be seen as a good ally. The thing is, for a white person to be a good ally, you kind of have to listen to other POCs than just the voices you like to hear.

The hard truth of the matter is neither you nor phandombigotryarchive nor trans-flint nor asianphancollective ever cared about antiracism and antiblackness. You did not care if a blog actually campaigned for antiracism if they disagreed with you. You did not even care when several bad actors in the phandom were racist towards Lucy St. Louis. All you cared about was bullying a small fandom into silence so you could control things.

No more.

[senditcolton]

You Always Have Been

summary: Brittany Hill imagined a different life for herself when she was younger. but now, celebrating her boyfriend Erik’s incredible achievement, she wonders why she ever wanted something else.

songs: X X  word count: 974 (plus insta edit!) warnings: none! pure fluff!

The warm summer breeze danced across Brittany’s skin as she took a deep breath, inhaling the clear crisp Colorado air. Behind her, she can still hear the party going strong, hoots and hollers finding their way into her ears.

She was celebrating – there was no way that she was going to sit out a celebration of her boyfriend’s biggest accomplishment in his long career. Erik won the Stanley Cup. There was no better reason to throw a party.

And Britt was proud of him. Insanely proud of him. Even though they only met a little over a year ago, she knew how much this meant to him and she was just grateful she got to spend this time with him.

She loved Erik, loved recognizing his victory. But this moment, out here away from the commotion, was her way of commemorating the moment in her own way.

Now, on the bench on the edge of Erik’s property, Britt takes another deep breath, grabbing the old Nikon film camera hung around her neck, lifting it up and adjusting the settings before snapping a picture of the landscape in front of her. Looking down, she pulls the lever to advance the film, absorbed in her work that she doesn’t notice the presence walking up behind her until a pair of warm hands land on her shoulders.

A reactionary jump and a turn of her head reveals Erik, standing behind her, his thumbs caressing her warm skin.

“Sorry,” he murmurs, walking around the wooden bench before taking a seat next to her. “Didn’t mean to startle you.”

Britt easily relaxes, leaning into his side as his strong arm wraps around her body, hand coming to rest on the top of her hip and she can feel the heat of his skin soaking through the soft linen of her sundress.

“It’s okay,” she replies with a sigh.

“What are you doing out here all alone?”

“Just thinking.”

“About what?” he questions, looking down at her with those gentle grey eyes.

“My high school crush, oddly enough.” Britt can’t stop the slight giggle that escapes her as she watches Erik’s brows pull together in confusion.

“Should I be jealous?” he asks, the teasing evident in his voice in response to her reaction.

“Not at all.”

“So, why were you thinking about your high school crush?”

“It’s stupid,” Britt shrugs, content to snuggle deeper into Erik’s side.

“Nothing you say is stupid,” Erik replies quickly. “Besides, out of the two of us, I’m the dumb one in this relationship.” Britt laughs again, pulling a similar chuckle from Erik’s chest, his thumb once again stroking over her skin. “Come on. You know you can tell me anything.”

Another sigh falls from Britt’s lips as she adjusts her position, coming to lay her head in his lap, looking up at him as the setting sun makes his blonde hair glow golden.

“Just sitting out here reminded me about the first high school party I went to. Filled with all the popular kids, my crush being one of them. I thought ‘wow, this is going to be the night everything changes for me. He’s going to notice me and we’ll fall in love.’ Instead, I spent the night sitting on a bench away from the party, being completely ignored.”

Erik adjusts his position above her, leaning closer and listening to her intently.

“And then I thought, ‘that’s okay, I can change. I can be better.’ And I spent so much of my life trying to be accepted, to be wanted. I hosted parties to buy people’s love. I starved myself to feel desired. And I got to feel that for miniscule moments but I tricked myself into believing that was enough.”

Britt exhales, shaking her head slightly as she goes back through her memories.

“I don’t know what eventually led me to snap out of it. I guess I just looked around and realized that it wasn’t fulfilling me the way I needed it to. And I wondered ‘why did I think this is what I wanted?’ So, I left. Left New Hampshire and came out here. Made myself a career doing what I love, found a place where I didn’t need the approval of others. I changed – for the better. And then I met you.”

With those words, she glanced back up at Erik with a soft smile on her face which he mirrors.

“I guess, it’s funny looking back and realizing that all of that led me here,” Britt concludes. Erik doesn’t say anything for a moment, just continues to stare down at her with that soft look in his eyes before he finally speaks.

“I kind of feel the same way.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah. Not in exactly the same way but, you know, after all the injuries and thinking I might be forced to retire… to being here, celebrating winning the Cup with my friends and family,” he pauses, shooting Britt the dorky wink that never fails to make her laugh. “With the most beautiful women in the world. Who I knew I couldn’t have done this without.”

“You’re just saying that.”

“I mean it. Think about it. The only difference between the previous seasons and this one is that I had you cheering me on from the stands every game.”

“I’m not that magical,” Britt laughs.

“Yes you are,” Erik quips back, his hand moving from it’s spot around her waist to cup her face, thumb brushing against her cheekbones. “The most remarkable person I’ve ever had the privilege to meet.”

There were no other words to say. Instead, Britt lifts her head up towards him, a silent request. Erik reads it easily, leaning down to capture his lips in hers. The two of them stay there, wrapped up in each other until the sun finally sets; a picture-perfect moment.

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