#storm's aro ass

[storm-coax]

aro related patches I made

Minors DNI this is a NSFW blog

[garbagecxre]

You Know I'm Good For It (+18)

summary: It's your day off, and you want to spend it with your loving partner, but his work has him caught up and missing the lunch date you had broken you back to prepare. How will he apologize for this disrespect, you wonder?

warnings: raunchy smut, heavy nsfw, eating out, squirting, she gets it on the table lmao, sex in the spider cave, some spanish sprinkled in there!

dom!miguel x sub!reader

wc: 2.2k~

note: this is my first fic in a VERY LONG TIME, so sorry if it's kinda basic, i'm trying to put myself out there first. i do have many other pieces planned, so pls follow me!!

Your feet were like fire as you stormed out of the cave mouth and towards the dias, a plate of hot food steady in your hand.

“Bebo, viente,” You call to him once you reach the bottom, but get not response. Sucking your teeth, you crane your neck to look over his hunched form, but the width of his shoulders block almost everything. Heaving a frustrated sigh, you walk around the dias to face him and call out, “Lyla, can we have a minute?”

The AI assistant and mutant jump in unison, then swing their heads around to face you. Miguel’s fangs were out, and his mouth was twisted in a snarl. Previously frustrated by something, no doubt. Lyla, on the other hand, began to shrink away in guilt like she’d gotten caught provoking the giant. You didn’t care to ask, only smirked at her as she disappeared into the virtual ether.

Miguel begins stepping down from the dias, shoulders slumping a bit as he closes the distance. His towering form greets you and leans over to plant a kiss atop your head. You huff, almost shoving the plate in his hands.

“Cabron, you’re annoying as hell,” you began before Miguel got to open his mouth, finger already jabbed into his chest, “first, I tried to ping you, tell you food was ready. But no, you don’t even acknowledge that, and I know Lyla read my message out to you!”

Lyla from a distant comm replies, “I did! Many times!”

“Many times!” You repeat, “Then, I sent people down here to tell you that food was ready. I sent Ben down here, and what did you do? You fucking made him cry! Why did you do that?”

All the mutant could do was blink in stunned silence as he listened to your rant. The only response he gives you was some blubbering, “Pero, mi nena, I—”

“Save it,” you hold a hand up, “I was trying to be nice and play housewife on my day off, but it seems that your work is more important than my cooking.” There was a pout lining her speech.

Miguel notices the shift in tone and immediately melts on top of you, pulling you into a one-armed embrace.

“I’m so sorry, mi beba,” he mutters into your hair, tightening his grip a little, “this is an important case I had to take care of.”

“And that’s supposed to make me feel better?” You cut him off, head shooting up to glare at him, “You made me wait almost an hour!”

“Okay, that’s on me, I’ll admit. But, I’m done now, and you have me all to yourself.” You feel a hand slide down your waist as he spoke, “I can make it up to you.”

“How the hell will you do that?” You reach around to swat his hands away, but his next words stop you in your tracks.

“I could eat you out.” The superhero’s words grant him a hard smack to the chest that has him quickly rebalancing his plate, “Ay, mi nena, don’t be like that.” He sets his plate down on a nearby work bench and pulls you in for a proper embrace, “When’s the last time I made you squirt, hm?”

“Stop, I’m not in the mood,” you start to pull away from his arms, but his grip remains firm around your waist. With a huff, you cross your arms against your chest to get as much distance as possible between you and the spider-man.

“I can change that,” he replies, hands lowering to her ass.

You scoff, “oh really? Like I’ll fall for it.”

“You can’t resist me, beba, we both know this.” Miguel’s words became like honey at that moment, then his hands find purchase around your thighs, and you feel yourself being hoisted up. You yelp, legs wrapping around his waist on instinct. Your vision is temporarily blocked, but you could feel the low chuckle rumble within his chest.

You smack his chest lightly with a pout, “Not funny!” Your eyes look everywhere but up into your lover’s, cheeks growing hot with embarrassment.

Miguel nudges your temple in an attempt to get you to look up at him. When you don’t budge, he parts his lips to let out a soft growl, causing the hairs on the back of your neck to stand and your head to jerk up and face your boyfriend.

“You know I’m good for it, beba,” you had trouble looking into his eyes, but for different reasons now. It was like a cloud of lust was cast over is eyes, his lids were hooded, and his gaze was no longer on yours. You cursed under your breath, forgetting about the slip dress you’d hastily donned before coming down here, braless and pressed against Miguel’s chest, presenting ample cleavage to him. You could almost see the bead of saliva start to form at the corner of his lips.

“You’ve been down here by yourself for too long,” you huff but relax into his arms, surrendering yourself a little to the giant male. “Let’s go home and—” You were cut off by teeth grazing the side of your neck, forcing a shuddering breath to escape your lips. You were no longer able to utter another word as his tongue pokes out and laps at the sensitive flesh caught in his jaws. All you could do was release another shuddered breath and finally melt into his embrace.

“That’s my good girl,” you feel his lips form the words against your skin, then he picks a spot to suck on gently while his hands begin to explore your body. He cups the underside of your ass as he bites a hickey into your flesh, your moan echoes throughout the cave.

“Bebo, please,” you whine, tilting your head back a bit to invite him in, “Let’s go somewhere more private—”

“Can’t wait,” He grumbles, arms tightening around so much that you can feel the rising bulge pressing up against your navel. You curse under your breath, straining your gaze to catch a glimpse of your dress having been hiked up by said bulge.

You curse again and look back into his lust stricken gaze, “Work bench,” you say, eyes darting towards the steel table behind him. His hulking form turns to acknowledge it before swinging you around like a rag doll and settling you down on top of its metal surface. You hiss as the cold steel stings your bare thighs.

He doesn’t lean in to kiss you, nor does spare another glance your way before dropping to his knees, irises now glowing red and fixated on your exposed sex. You knew that it was easier to accept your fate when he got like this. So, leaning back against your forearms, your fingertips slowly curl into the light fabric of your dress. A gentle tug was all you needed to expose the rest and earn a growl of approval from the beast.

You bite back a moan as Miguel’s hot breath is like silk against your sex. Your legs moved like they had a mind of their own, spreading a little wider and giving more access to the man before you. The first contact between his tongue and your clit was like lightning, your hips buck up and lips part in a soft gasp. He gives you a few seconds to relax before poking his hot tongue back out to lap slow and sensual circles around your clit, a satisfied groan rumbles deep in his chest as the taste of your essence coats his tongue.

“Please,” you manage to get out between moans, “don’t fucking tease me.” No verbal response from the beast, only a quickened pace of his tongue. You buck your hips once more and gasp loudly, white-hot rods of pleasure shoot up your spine and spread throughout your body. Miguel has to grab hold of your thighs to keep your hips still while you writhe under him, but his tongue remains merciless, lapping up the glistening pearl between your legs. You had no choice but to take all of what he’s giving you and then some.

A mixture of your hips bucking against his ever tightening grip and the fast lapping of his tongue had you almost wailing out. You saw sparks in your vision and at this moment, you had no control over your body; your moans barely sounded like your own, they came out almost like a growl, something you’ve heard your lover do many times. Miguel’s only response was to flick his tongue faster against your clit, silently encouraging more of those primal sounds from you. It was maddening how good he was at making you scream, how easy it was to make your back arch off the table and make your thighs clench tight around his head. 

Your orgasm came in waves, first your toes begin to curl, then your hips start to shake and buck uncontrollably. With a final gasping cry, your back forms a deep arch off the cool surface, and you release all over his mouth and chin, a puddle forming beneath the both of you. But, his tongue doesn’t stop, you realize, and the pressure begins to build up a second time. You couldn’t brace yourself fast enough for the second orgasm, and he didn’t stop until the puddle became a pool, and you lay limp on top of the warmed steel.

Your eyes were glazed over, the only sound that could be heard throughout the cave were the sound of your whimpers. Miguel stood, the lower half of his suit dissolving as his hands grab your thighs once more. You feel something softly plop against your navel, looking down you notice your lover’s lower half naked and his erect cock pointing at you, precum slowly dripping out of its angry red tip and creating a small pool on your skin. It twitched in response as his eyes finally landed on you, gaze scanning your half exposed body and drinking it all in.

“Que buena eres,” the mutant’s voice comes out hoarse and breathy, your response was a whine and another buck of your hips. You were weak, and your desire left you hot and desperate for more, you wanted nothing more than to be broken over and over again on this table. Taking this as a sign to waste no more of your time, he grabs your hips and pushes himself past your folds. Yours and Miguel’s combined moans fill the cave, the warmth encasing him nearly making him crumble where he stood.

“Fuck,” he hisses, fingers digging into the soft flesh of your waist, “tell me when to move, beba.”

“Move!” You breathe as your legs wrap around his waist, pulling him deeper inside your heat. With a growl, he pries your legs back apart, bringing them to rest on his shoulders instead. His hips begin to move, a moderate pace that had you moaning softly, but it wasn’t enough. You watch Miguel’s brows push together as he struggles to keep his pace without hurting you. You grab his hand and bring it up to your throat, a silent message giving him your consent to let go.

He takes it gratefully, hand wrapping around your neck tight, but not enough to cut off your breathing. His hips gradually pick up in pace, his glowing eyes were trained on yours as the force of his thrusts nearly knocks over the table. This only encourages him though, hands gripping your thighs even tighter as his thrusts become erratic. The force of it all brought tears to your eyes, your mouth hung open as moans and cries just fell out. You were a pathetic mess under the mutant, the previous orgasms rendering you useless against his strength.

He only stopped when your cunt pushed him out and a steady stream of clear liquid hits his crotch. You were crying and writhing against his grip as your orgasm consumed your entire body. He barely gives you time to feel the pleasure before sliding back in with the same ferocity as before, hands now gripped around your calves. He spreads your legs wide so he could get a good view of your limp and sweaty body, lips parting in a snarl as his pace once again quickens so much that the pattern of his thrusts become erratic. Miguel loses himself in the pleasure, growls and grunts being the main sounds that fill the room. Your whimpers can’t even be heard over the sound of skin slapping against one another.

Finally, you feel his hips stutter and look up to see his face contorted in pure ecstasy. For a second, you could feel Miguel’s entire body tense, and then hot ribbons of cum coat your walls. You sigh out as your lover leans over and rests his upper half atop you, arms now wrapped tight around your waist. He sighs against your neck, leaving soft pecks on damp flesh. For a while, you both lay like this and catch your breath.

Then, Miguel stands straight again, his suite once again fully intact, “I’d clean you up, but I don’t have any supplies here,” He says sheepishly, “I could carry you back to the house if you want.”

“You know what,” you wave your hand lazily, “it’s the least you could do for making me wait an hour.”

“What, my dick wasn’t enough?” Miguel quickly ducks as a foreign object came flying at him, “Alright, alright, come here.” He chuckles, scooping your weak body into his arms. As he walks into the cave mouth, he pulls you in a little closer to whisper, “So… You think you’ll be up for round two when we get home?”

FIN

[hey-august]

“Do you know how much I love seeing you like this?” Buggy saying to Reader please? 🥺🥵 I love all of this.

i gotchu, anon!

Warnings: NSFW, NC17, oral M receiving, buggy x GN!reader Word count: ~800

all damn day. all fucking day, buggy has been messing with you. teasing you. at first it was subtle. standing a little too close. putting his hand on the crook of your neck, instead of your shoulder. then he got bolder. and more annoying. finding reasons to brush against you. any excuse that let him whisper in your ear. soon those whispers turned into teasing moans. just soft enough for you to hear. he loved seeing how red your face became. even better was waiting until you stormed off and sending a hand to grab your ass. the scowl you’d throw his way only made him want to do more. so he did.

buggy took advantage of any moment when people weren’t paying attention. empty hallways, blocked corners - hell, as long as people weren’t looking at either of you - he increased his advances. crashing his lips against yours, slipping his tongue into your mouth, pressing into you as much as he could. anything to rile you up, before pulling away, leaving you breathless and wanting more. and that damn chop-chop ability meant that you couldn’t keep hold of him. whenever you tried, the clown would simply dismantle himself and escape your grasp.

you’re nearly in tears by the end of the day. the last ferocious kiss pulled an embarrassing whiney noise from your mouth when buggy broke away. you had to pretend it was a sneeze, hoping your crew members believed the excuse. someone eventually passed along orders for you to report to the captain’s office and it didn’t seem like they suspected anything.

you knock on the door and wait. he’s expecting you, so it doesn’t take long for the door to swing open. you were only expecting a hand to be at the door. instead, it was buggy. all of him. and instinct takes over. you push yourself inside and grab the lapels of his jacket, using them to both pull him in for a kiss and to maneuver him around so he’s pressed against the wall.

you barely register the click of the door shutting and being locked, focusing only on the soft moans buggy releases against your lips. you get on your knees and try to undo buggy’s pants, but your hands are too shaky. your own desperation getting in the way. frustrated, you grasp helplessly at his pants and look up at your captain. that fucking smirk turns you into putty.

buggy places his bare hand on your face and runs his thumb on your bottom lip. you maintain eye contact and obediently open your mouth. his thumb slides in for you to suck and swirl your tongue around. it’s nice, but this isn’t really what you want.

“puh-lz” you beg around his thumb and tug on his pants again. you swear his eyes dilate.

“fuck, do you know how much i love seeing you like this?” he asks, finally undoing his pants. 

his hard cock springs out, nearly as desperate for attention as you are. buggy smears his dripping precum on your lips. he just can’t stop teasing you, even though you’re already sitting there, mouth open, begging to suck his cock. he breaks when you give him that pathetic look, though. a needy frown with tears collecting in your eyes. as though you’re taking it personally that he’s not coming in your throat already.

“open all the way,” he grunts, pressing the head of his cock into your mouth. 

the way your tongue curves around the bottom sends a shudder through buggy’s body. you start bobbing your head, taking as much as you can before you need to pull back for air. it’s still not enough for you, though. starting from the tip, you slide your mouth down the shaft, making sure every piece is surrounded by your plush mouth. you press down further, ignoring the tears in your eyes and tightness in your thought, going until your nose is pressed against buggy’s pelvis and his heavy balls rest on your wet chin.

“fuck! k-keep going, i-i’m gonna come,” buggy groans. you pull back and wrap a hand around his spit covered cock. it doesn’t take long before buggy feels his balls tightening. he places a hand on the back of your head and thrusts his hips in time with your movement, being sure to keep the head of his cock in your mouth when he starts coming.

you try your best to capture all of his cum in your mouth. despite some trickling down the back of your throat, and a few drops leaking out with the last few thrusts of his cock, you’re left with a surprisingly large mouthful as a reward.

“s-show me”

you open wide and stick out your tongue just a little, so buggy can see how much there is. he uses a thumb to wipe the cum dribbling from your mouth back inside for you to swallow. once your mouth is clear, you show him again, feeling pleased when he nods in approval.

now, it’s your turn. you were kind enough to not tease buggy, so hopefully he’ll return the favor. and if not, at least you’re in for a fun night.

(prompt list)

[ineffablyendless]

SMOCTOBER DAY 5: Mile High Club/I'd like that very much

Let's pretend I'm not awfully late to the party, shall we?

Monsterfucker bingo ticked: Claws, extra limbs, a lil bit of fangs

Rating: E

Ship:Hob Gadling/Morpheus|Dream of the Endless (Dreamling)

October 5th (Smoctober)

mile high club/golden/I'd like that very much

Monsterfucker Bingo

Fangs? Extra limb?

“You couldn't,” Hob pants, as he feels fingers and claws scrambling for the button of his jeans, pressed as his front is against the meagre strip of wall between the loo and the air-locked door. “Couldn't wait two more hours for us to get home?”

“Could you?” Morpheus purrs knowingly, whispered against his ear. There are no mirrors-nothing to indicate or show how hulked out Morpheus had become within the cramped confines of the airplane restroom (First class, but even that can only afford them so much)-but he feels fur in place of skin, and the chitter of too many teeth bitten into the stretched collar of his sweatshirt, digging for skin.

Another limb reaches past the band of his jeans, and Morpheus purrs once more to find no other hindrance to Hob's cock-rock hard, despite himself, Morpheus hadn't been wrong about either of their impatience, knows that his endearingly human partner has a libido to match his own, insatiable.

Hob moans softly as a single bone sharp tipped claw teases the slit of his leaking cock, before he brings up his arm to muffle his own noises, lest invite trouble for the poor, underpaid stewardesses. His palm, this palm, is rough with scars and callouses, almost as unforgiving as the inside of his own jeans, providing a satisying, delicious friction as the rest of the limbs Hob's awareness, two-no, three, entertain themselves by caressing the rest of Hob's lust-sensitive body; two hands pinching and flicking his peaked nipples, rucking up the hems of Hob's poor travel sweatshirt and another shoved down the seat of his jeans to tease the globes of his ass, dipping a teasing finger for the twitching hole in between: sore and open and wet from their earlier jaunt in the hotel room this morning, where Hob had laid Morpheus down and rode him screaming, full speed ahead, straight into the sunset.

The hand fisted around his dribbling cock pumps once, twice, thrice and pauses, and Hob is mortified to find himself keening desperately for the absence of friction, brought near to tears for the desperation. He is so, so close.

“Please,” he mutters, hips moving in circles for it's return, humping into slick channel of Morpheus' fist and the finger toying the rim of his gaping ass. He is near insensate with it. “Please please please please pleasepleaseplease,”

You do not seem to need anymore of my help to reach your peak, little one,“ Morpheus chuckles, and Hob only moans, feeling like an overeager puppy from his ministrations. ”Go on, chase it yourself.“

He feels feverish from lust, desperation, utter humiliation as he humps the unmoving fist, and the loving warm cup of his embrace on his ass. All the while he is pressed into the awkward slick plastic wall by what amounts to an upright, fanged weighted blanket, with a mouth void of breath and a slick, long tongue that dips, occasionally, to collect the sweat pooled in his collarbones like the rawest form of ambrosia.

Orgasm comes like the boom of thunder on a clear summer's day-startling-and relief like the invigorating storm. Morpheus purrs one last time, in approval, and Hob is released.

When he turns, the monster-in so many ways-has returned to it's fascimile of human skin, with his indigo starlight eyes and corpse-cold Ivory skin, licking the last of Hob's spends from between the webs of his hand, now returned to two.

”Better?“ Hob asks, teasingly, having gotten his breath back. The look Morpheus sends him is exasperated, humorous, as if he is the one who is meant to ask Hob that. He says instead, sighing: ”I cannot wait to come home.“

”I'll fuck you properly there.” Hob promises, reaching to wrap his arms around Morpheus' waist with a gentle peck to the tip of his nose, as if he had not just been brough to violent orgasm within the airplane bathroom. “Roses and candles, baby. We'll get to celebrate our anniversary properly.”

Morpheus sighs, melting happily into his embrace as he unlocks the restroom door. “I would like that very much.”

[bitebitesnap]

Kissing Vegeta is a bit of a challenge.

Vegeta is....special when it comes to affection.

He's independent. Prefers to be by himself so he doesn;t have to worry about someone else's problems. Unhindered by weaklings slowing him down, willingly or not.

But for a while, he;d been acting oddly out of place for such a pompous ass.

You couldn;t quite place why, though. The Saiyan was very private, rarely ever speaking to you specifically. After Bulma delegated the care of the prince's devices to you, those delightful chats increased, to your immense frustration. Though, after the defeat of Cell, he seemed to have calmed down.

But nowadays, there was something off about the hot-headed prince. He;d be tense, refusing to look at you directly during conversations, a softer, more restrained tone in his voice. Wherever you went he could pick you out of a crowd and if you needed something done he was the first to action, even if Goku was there.

It took Goku nearly walloping him right in the face, sparking a furious tantrum from the prince before he stormed off, to make his unusual nature piece itself together.

The earth-raised Saiyan had approached you not long after, rubbing his head in confusion while commenting Vegeta had been acting off for a while. When asked he said that he'd seemed distracted, unfocused at his worst as normally he could keep track of anything even if the planet was exploding. Usually if he was distracted it was because something was bothering him, but when he asked the prince had lost it on him.

For a moment the two of you conversed about what could be bothering the prince so much. The chamber was in order, as you commented, so it was out of the question. His rivalry with him was well into it;s normal state again, according to Goku, so that was also impossible. Maybe the lack of planet-wide decimation would grind his gears but it couldn't be that either as he was pretty chilled out after a year or so with just Goku.

But the Saiyan takes note, then, of a common factor. Of all the times Vegeta seemed distracted, it was when he was doing something he normally wouldn't. A new move, upgrades to hi technique, or increase in his own power to catch up to him, Goku said. All those times, he seemed unable to keep up as well. At first, he'd thought it was because of the focus needed for his training.

Then he notes that not only that, the only times he seemed to have something new, was when you were around to watch.

And all of a sudden it makes sense. The soft voice, the attention, the action in your favor.

Vegeta, prince of all Saiyans, had a crush. On you.

Once you figured it out you thanked Goku for his help. Though you hadn't quite told him your thoughts, the smile on his face said everything as he waved, a brief comment to not push him.

Of course just knowing was half the battle. Vegeta, stubborn as he was, would never outright admit his feelings to you no matter how much evidence you had. And even worse if you did indeed push him, he would retract into himself so tightly you feared he wouldn;t come out.

So naturally, surprise is in order.

THe best times are when he's just out of training. He's tired, hungry, and more than a little annoyed by people in general. Ever since getting his own personal chamber he'd been using it nonstop. He didn;t bother to park it anywhere special, so it's just out in the open. You've gotten more than one ramble from the prince about people talking about it on his 'territory'. Which, while it was literal miles wide, the chamber was on a section of unused land not even a few streets outside of town. To keep it within range of Capsule Corps in case he breaks it again, you guess.

So when he's outside, he's on alert. Sneaking up on him would be near impossible-he's got the ears of a rabbit and the punch of a bear. And being able to sense life energy like the rest of the Z-fighters, it was basically a lost cause at the start. He'd knock your head off if he so much as caught wind of you snooping around, even if he knew it was you he'd still give you a tongue lashing-at least some insults for trying.

Except, of course, when he first gets out.

It's the dead of night by the time the whirring gears shut down. Footsteps thump an unsteady path across the floor as the door opens. Vegeta pants hard, sweat dripping down his face and neck. Shaking his head throws droplets everywhere, the usual flame drooped like a dying leaf in fall. The towel on his shoulders is soaked, rimmed with crimson, as he brings it up to wipe at his eyes.

You watch from a few steps away, behind the chamber's door. He'd opened it without looking, his guard down from the lack of activity. But still he calls your name when he drops the rag back onto his shoulders, mild irritation to his tone. Those dangerous eyes slowly turn to you, unimpressed by your appearance in his comment of your lack of skill in the art of surprise.

But you hadn't meant to sneak up on him, you say. You'd only wanted him to know what Bulma was planning for the chamber. Which was not a lie, she had told you to tell him of her ideas to upgrade the booster coils again that would increase the gravity from 300 to 500 or more. The topic was taken eagerly too, as he raised an interested brow.

Perfect.

(Part 1)

[tobiasdrake]

Well, chief. I guess this is it. Thanks for everything, and I'll see you aro-- Oh, we aren't finished yet.

Goddammit.

Hypothetically speaking, if you were going to be alone with a man who might try to kill you, what size of knife would you carry on your person and where would you stash it? Asking for a friend.

Are you, though? You know in a Saturday Morning Cartoon when the adult guardian goes, "The plot is happening but YOU will go to your room and behave yourself. You will NOT slip out and go do the thing."

But this is like episode 87 and we all know they're going to slip out and go do the thing anyway so, really, saying this is just a formality at this point?

That's your level of authority, Yakou. Thank you so much for saving my life from my terrible mistakes last chapter; Anyways, back to doing the things that got me in trouble in the first place!

I'll write him a note and leave it in Halara's hotel room, along with an IOU formally requesting that they deliver it to Yakou upon confirmation of my death.

I obviously won't be able to pay the IOU but at this point I'm pretty sure Halara only cares about the optics of charging money.

Kurumi, I took you to meet my dangerous, ambiguous wildcard contact. There's a 50/50 chance he's going to tie you to a chair and dangle you over a vat of acid before all is said and done. We are well past the point where something as innocuous as worry is inappropriate.

OH THANK GOD. Of Death. Literally. Thank you for finally ending this awkward quasi-farewell, Shinigami.

We're running out of good ideas to escape from this sub. This is one step above pointing behind Yakou and shouting, "LOOK, A FALSE LEAD!" then bolting when he turns around.

Because then it will spoil. The best kinds of evidence have an expiration date!

Yuma finally proving that abandoning all pretense and bailing at the speed of feet is, and always has been, a viable option for dodging Yakou's paper-thin attempts at professional responsibility.

Sorry, man, but you-

HAHAHAHA OKAY, Yuma made me laugh but I was unprepared for Kurumi to then also bolt out the door. XD Run, guys! Yakou looks like he maxes out at a shamble! A brisk jogging pace should do!

To be fair, she does not work here. It'd be uncomfortable for her to stick around someone else's workspace without her one and only connection to this place.

Sorry, Yakou. As hard as you're going to kiss her ass, Kurumi is not interested in becoming your intern. She's here for Yuma. And she is as much of a troublemaker.

HOLY SHIT YOU GODDAMN VAMPIRE

I legit did not turn the camera to check the fireplace. He may have been here for this entire scene thus far.

I KNOW RIGHT!? We need to put a bell on him. Wait, no, bell only chimes when you move. ...one of those perpetual motion clicky ball sets that managers have on their desk to make them look important. He can wear it around his neck.

You heard as much as Yakou, man. Yuma was super cryptic and then fled.

*sigh* Okay, what's Desuhiko pulling this time, Vivia? Is the pale blue blink supposed to be Fubuki? But then the storm would be... him getting the shit kicked out of him....

Ugh, I don't have time for his shenanigans, I have a trap to go die in.

For a man who was all gung-ho about box cutting my throat out, you sure don't seem to be in any rush to do it. I think Vivia used up all of his energy trying to stand up dramatically.

How are you going to feel if I die before you have a chance to kill me, Vivia? Can you live with that regret? Or... I guess, since you want to die someday, maybe not being able to live with that regret would be a good thing.

I guess. Keep doing what you're doing and hope for the worst, my guy. Power of positive thinking!

[gurlbesimpin]

In the beast's den

(Karl Heisenberg x Gen!neutral reader)

chapter eight: true colors

Chapter eight: True Colors

Ever since that faithful night where Heisenberg opened up to you ever so slightly, he was silent. He barely speaks to you, only when necessary or during 'training'. Most days are spent with your shooting and dexterity practices, whilst Heisenberg remains in his workshop; working the days and nights away. 

A week had passed, a total of nine days since you stumbled into his factory during that particularly rough snowstorm that threatens to return soon. Despite only knowing him for such a short time, your heart openly welcomes him inside; his own feelings however, are unknown. 

It baffles you how surprisingly kind he is to you. Sure he had bitched around a few times, and he does still very much frighten you; he could kill you at any given moment with ease, and yet...

He is nice? 

After a ten second lecture from the lord and two hours of shooting small dots on the wall, you grow frustrated. Why is he avoiding you all of a sudden? You had just met, and he's allowing you to roam freely in his factory and workspace? Something has to be off, he has to be planning something. Was lady dimitrescu right? Maybe he's putting on a charming exterior to subtly persuade you into trusting him, just to cut you off later. 

Huffing and cursing, you all but gently place the old-school revolver down on the ground; turning on your heels to storm off into the dark, rusty and dangerous lower levels of the enormous metal structure underground, the factory.

Questions flood your mind whilst you quietly step through the barely illuminated halls and chambers. Why are you even staying here? You could just- leave? Is it because you crave protection? Surely if you left, something would kill you sooner than inside his factory. Or are you craving-

No. No you aren't craving that! Out of everything, you could want or need, the last thing is an old man who isolates himself inside a literal deathtrap of a factory. It has to be something else keeping you here, something incomprehensible at this moment.

You arrive in an old storage room, glancing around for any signs of the metal lord. You know he's likely in his workshop, but that is territory you won't step inside. His soladats and other 'specimen' he operates in roaming around outside of his little 'den'. 

Glancing around, you find nothing special in this messy storage. Old books, rusted scraps, old clothing, boxes, more boxes, some old jars with a scribbled label... but no Heisenberg. Turning to leave, there's a thump behind you, causing you to turn swiftly. Still nobody, but an open box on the floor. Sighing, slow and careful steps towards the fallen box. You lift it, seeing an old book inside. It, seems like a journal-

"Hmm?"

Should you, no. No you can't so that! But damn, you need to know more about him. With nimble fingers, you open the journal, information you've been searching for flooding your vision.  You find notes on these other 'lords' he spoke of.

'salvatore Moreau:

Stupid moronic fish freak, only wishes to please that witch with all the power he has. Even if I could get his slimey hands on my side, It wouldn't help-"

'Donna Beneviento:

Girl and her ugly-ass-pscho-doll. I don't know much about her, what I do know...

She's utterly useless in combat. She's of no use to me.'

'Lady Dimibitch:

Tall ignorant, selfish cunt. Her power could perhaps be of use, but that bitch and her bloodsucking daughters stand in my way-'

Most importantly however, there are diary entries inside. Experiences, his true... his true colors.

'We're nothing but mere failed Cadou experiments to her, forced into eternal servitude.

She still calls me her son, what a fucking joke-

I'll take that witch down, but this won't be a simple task. I'll need power, more power than the stupid brainwashed villagers could ever comprehend...

I need my freedom, my life, my dignity

I need it back.

I must kill her'

"Well well... snooping around are we? Aren't you supposed to be training?"

Your head shoots up, directly staring at Heisenberg. He has a faint smirk on his scarred lips, for once not a cigar with him.

"Heisenberg I-"

"Call me Karl, I already fucking told you"

He snaps back. So he hasn't forgotten about that faithful night, he remembers it. Of course-

"Right... Karl... why haven't you been talking to me?"

His smirk falters, if you could see through his sunglasses, your heart would sink at his intense glare. The takes a heavy step forward, now within arms teach of your trembling form.

"Answer my question, kid"

Gulping, you decide to take a bit of a risk, asking him once again why he hasn't been talking to you. Instead of angry shouting, he leans forward, grabbing you by the shoulders and shoving you into a wall. His face is mere inches away from your own, his face contorted in annoyance. 

When no words leave your lips, his annoyance turns into anger; the hand in your shoulder moving to your throat. Not choking you, but a silent threat. Tears form in your eyes, dimitrescu was right. He's cruel, careless ... so close to ending you with a singular hand. 

His scarred and dry lips part, his words like venom 

"Tell. Me. Kid!"

The tears slowly start flowing, the color draining from your face as your lips tremble wildly. Stumbling and whispering words, hopefully to soothe the enraged lord.

"I... was curious, hei- Karl" 

He snarls, considering your words for a moment, his grip loosening but not fully gone. His sunglasses slide down his nose an inch, revealing his hazel eyes. They seem conflicted, not fully angry, but certainly not friendly.

He doesn't speak, instead arching an eyebrow after your words finally land in his mind.

"I... was worried... because you didn't talk to me at all! I tried doing my training, doing the work you tell me to do... I did all of that! I- I don't know why I'm worried, but I care Karl! You listened to my venting the other day, I'm here to listen to yours-"

His grip tightens again, he seems to not believe a word you say. He spits out his response, his tone sharp

"As if you give a shit, don't lie to me kid. You don't give a damn about me, nobody does. Not that big bitch, not that fishstick freak, not that doll... not that old hag... not you-*

He pauses, his eyes glancing down for a moment. Whilst he's distracted, you wriggle one of your arms free; trying to knock him back somehow. This, is a fatal mistake. His eyes snap back up, the hand around your throat tightening as he slams you against the wall again. He growls, a primal sound sending shivers down your spine.

"I'm not one of your soldats, Karl! I'm not a machine you can program and train to kill your mother!"

Karl hesitates for a moment, leaning closer so that your noses are touching. His hazel pearls analysing your every move, every reaction, every emotion.

"Oh but you are, kid! You're a tool for my plans! You're nothing but a walking weapon to me, so don't fucking pretend you give a shit about me! Go to that super-sized bitchface if you have a problem with me!"

You squeak as he pulls you closer, his eyes burning yellow all of a sudden. A tell take sign of the Cadou.

"I do care Karl! Why else would I still be here?! You saved my damn life, and I'm willing to repay you by assisting in your plans! But treat me like a fucking human! I know how you feel Lord, I know it. I now know what happened to you, and I'm sorry that your life had to be this way. I didn't want to believe that you're a monster like Dimitrescu told me, but damn it, you have to believe me when I say I AM worried! You haven't been talking to me because if last week, right? Because you opened up? Why?!"

You shout directly into his face, your face depicts confusion, desperation and sadness. Dimitrescu... he thought you believed her... and this whole time, you didn't? Within a second, he pulls back; his eyes looking down as he huffs heavily. He glares at his desk, grabbing a metal rod with a loud growl and for a second, you believe he's going to kill you. 

Instead, he roars, slamming the pipe against the wall over and over again. Kicking, breaking, cracking it. The pipe bends, falling to the ground as he calms himself down. Taking deep breaths, he briefly glances at you, before turning away and muttering under his breath: 

"Go, kid. Leave."

You stand against the wall, sweating profusely and shivering in fear. When he turns to leave, you leap forward, grabbing his shoulder. A daring move. He halts, not reacting or turning his head; standing in the doorway like a statue. Your grip on his shoulder relaxes, only a faint and gentle touch.

"Karl, please... I- I do care. I don't know why, but I do"

Expecting your words to fall in deaf ears, you prepare for the worst. So when he turns and places a hand on your cheek softly, you're surprised. His hand moves down to your shoulder, pulling you close as he wrap his arms around you, allowing you to cry in his shoulder. He would do the same, if he allowed himself to do so. 

"I'm... sorry buttercup- I don't do the whole 'caring' thing... I took you for granted. I didn't know how to express my feelings, I'm so fucking sorry-"

His words sound genuine as he sniffles. The closest thing to him crying you've seen sofar. Gripping his jacket, you cry into the old fabric as he holds you close. A moment of silences passes, before he gently pulls away, his gaze soft and... caring? Hiccuping, you choke out your response:

"I'll help you get that bitch... just please- talk to me!"

Heisenberg closes his eyes, swallowing thickly as he pulls you close once more. He can't explain it, his anger now completely subsided and is now replaces with care. He doesn't know how to react, he's never felt this...

"I- I'll try buttercup. I swear- let's get a drink..."

[aro-culture-is]

aro culture is

tw - suggestive, very long and ranty

that thing where you're constantly questioning your identity cause you feel something for a person but it doesn't feel exactly romantic but you don't know so you keep searching up how romance feels and the check boxes say no but you can't stop that lingering in your mind saying maybe and you just keep thinking about it every time you look at that person

or when you're so violently shipped with someone (despite having said multiple times that you're aroace) that you actually start to feel something (above) and you try to explain how you feel but you just can't cause you don't register your feelings and your feelings are just little storms of pure emotion in your body and you just. can't live with it.

sorry about that long ass vent, have a good day :)

.

[astral-express-family]

Self-Insert Info! (Will be updated occasionally probably)

Overarching Info!

Pure of heart, dumb of ass. Would give all organs & limbs for any f/os. All have fucked up genders and daddy issues. All are sapphic, genderqueer/demigender in some way, and on the aro & ace spectrums. Usually have a twin and an older sibling. Has a pet frog named Noah - sometimes sentient, sometimes not.

Five Nights at Freddy's

Name: Meg Roseman

Pronouns: she/it

Nicknames (From Others): Meggie/Love/Sweetheart/Flower blossom (from Phone Gal)

Nicknames (For Others): Sunshine (for Phone Gal)

Extra Info: We're happily married, and have been for several years at this point. Our anniversary is 9/2.

Detectives United/Other related media

Name: Celine Aers/Brown

Pronouns: she/he/it

Nicknames (From Others): Kiddo (from Dorian), Favorite Niece (from Uncle Mortimer), Spirit (from Uncle James), Little Angel (from Uncle Dorian), Sport (from Aunt Amber), Kitty (from Aunt Shade)

Nicknames (For Others): Uncle Morti/Uncle Roses (for Uncle Mortimer), Uncle Ghost (for Uncle James), Aunt Photo/Aunt Memory (for Aunt Anna), Uncle da Vinci (for Uncle Dorian), Aunt Agent (for Aunt Amber), Aunt Vulpine/Aunt Girlboss (for Aunt Shade)

Extra Info: Definitely the most Mary-Sue-esc of my S/Is. She's a forest spirit with a few cat-like traits (claws & a tail) and behaviors (stretches like one & lays in the sun). I was already an older teen when I met Dorian, so I only sometimes call him Dad. He's still my dad and I still love him like one. My anniversary with Yasmina and Althena is 2/15.

Dark Parables

Name: Cel Daffodil Branch

Pronouns: it/she/they

Nicknames (From Others): Cookie (from Kai)

Nicknames: (For Others): TBA

Extra Info: A childhood friend of Kai and Gerda. After the Snow Queen incident, it ran away from home. She was found and taken in by the Red Riding Hoods Sisters. She was there during the Mist Wolves incident. They sometimes exchange letters with Kai, and followed him to Floralia when he followed Gerda.

GreedFall

Name: Leslie de Sardet

Pronouns: she/ze

Nicknames (From Others): Dear Cousin (from Constantin), Mundeinhanem (from Síora), Your Highness (from Vasco), Green Blood (from Kurt), my child (from Petrus)

Nicknames (For Others): Darling Cousin (for Constantin), Mundeinhanem (for Síora), Sailor (for Vasco), Captain (for Kurt), Aphs (for Aphra)

Extra Info: I project onto the GF player character. Síora and I are disgustingly in love, and our anniversary is 3/19.

The Legend of Vox Machina

Name: Xerneas Fate

Pronouns: she/they/fae

Nicknames (From Others): Love/Sugar (from Cassandra)

Nicknames (For Others): Cassie/Darling (for Cassandra), Percy/Gunsling King (for Percival)

Extra Info: Half-elf. Was second-in-command of the Whitestone Rebellion and pined (not-so-)subtly for Cassie for like 90% of it. Our anniversary is 3/15.

Wizard101

Name: Victoria Moonhunter

Pronouns: She/they/ze

Nicknames (From Others): Frosty/Sweetie/Sweetest (from Mellori)

Nicknames (For Others): Petal/Baby/Mel (for Mellori), Dad (for Arthur), Ben/Fireball (for Bentley)

Extra Info: Technically two S/Is combined. Ice wizard who dual-schools in storm. Friends with the rest of the Carpe Diem Society, I just am too lazy to add the nicknames at stuff rn.

Fortnite (Save the World)

Name: Rosebud Debonaire

Pronouns: She/they

Nicknames (From Others): Love/Rosie (from Clip), Flower (from Dennis)

Nicknames (For Others): Dear/Cas (for Clip), Denny (for Dennis)

Extra Info: An Outlander-class hero. One of the only people who can call Clip 'Cas' or any variant thereof.

Ace Attorney

Name: Meg Roseman

Pronouns: she/he

Nicknames (From Others): Girlie (from Larry)

Nicknames (For Others): My Man (for Larry)

Extra Info: Not very developed. Larry's just my best friend it is what it is.

Genshin Impact

Name: Aslia Rosebloom

Pronouns: she/ro

Nicknames (From Others): Azzy/Cool Big Sister (from Bennett), Snowflake (from Kaeya), Icicle (from Diluc), My Icy Friend (from Venti), My Dandelion/Sweetheart (from Amber), Guiding Star/Darling (from Lumine), Sweetie/Firefly/Little Light (from Lynette), Lovely Ice (from Lyney)

Nicknames (For Others): Floaty Pal (for Paimon), Benny/Lil' Buddy (for Bennett), Snowdrift (for Kaeya), 'Luc/Inferno (for Diluc), Feather Boy/Vens (for Venti), My Bunny (for Amber), Lulu/Lumi/My Crystal (for Lumine), Lost Boy Returned/Returned (for Aether), Nettie (for Lynette), 'Ney (for Lyney), Remi (for Freminet)

Extra Info: Catalyst user with a Cryo vision. Resident of the city of Mondstat. 1000% a member of Benny's Adventure Team. Lumine and I's anniversary is 5/16, and I will add Amber+Eula and I's is 7/2. Lynette and I's is 8/17.

Honkai: Star Rail

Name: Miya "Debonaire" Starshine

Pronouns: They/it/he/she

Nicknames (From Others): Little Bird (from Welt), Birdie (from Himeko)

Nicknames (For Others): Danny (for Dan Heng), Mar (for March 7th), Dad (for Welt), Astie (for Asta), Kiddo (for Misha)

Extra Info: Part of the Astral Express Crew. Met Arlan and Misha and promptly claimed both of them as their brothers within the day. Was perfectly content with being single until it realized "oh dang i love Asta". The only one of the Astral Express Kids (itself, Dan Heng, March 7th, Stelle, and Caelus) to call Welt "Dad".

Monster Rancher

Name: Ivy Flower

Pronouns: She/it/he/they

Nicknames (From Others): Babe (from Holly)

Nicknames: For Others): Flower Petal (for Holly)

Extra Info: Also not very developed. I just really love Holly, y'know? Our anniversary is July 23rd.

The Amazing Digital Circus

Name: Tundra

Pronouns: she/per/it

Nicknames (From Others): Baby (from Gangle)

Nicknames (For Others): Dear (for Gangle), Rab-b&@*% (for Jax)

Extra Info: Going to fight Jax on Gangle's behalf.

Monster Prom

Name: Skelly Taun

Pronouns: It/she/fae

Nicknames (From Others): Angel (from Amira), Bestie (from Vicky)

Nicknames (For Others): TBA

Extra Info: Has an incredibly misleading name - it's a siren and not a skeleton. Amira and I's anniversary is Nov. 19.

Doctor Who

Name: Joey Feather

Pronouns: they/she/bake

Nicknames (From Others): TBA

Nicknames (For Others): TBA

Extra Info: Rory's childhood friend. Wasn't super fond of Amy at first, but eventually came around. Lost touch, but eventually reconnected and fell in love. A healthy dose of one-sided pining on Joey's part. Cares more about their bakery job than about whatever world-ending catastrophe is happening this time. Rory & I's anniversary is 12/16.

Hi-Fi RUSH

Name: Cocoa

Pronouns: fae/hir/her

Nicknames (From Others): Sweetie (from Peppermint

Nicknames (For Others): 'Mint (for Peppermint)

Extra Info: Has an Armstrong tech prosthetic eye. Faer vision's been subpar most of faer life, so fae got an Armstrong eye to better it. Still wears glasses anyways. Has scarring on her neck, usually hides it with a scarf.

Kin list jumpscare!

(Most of these affect my selfshipping but some do not)

- Willow (Don't Starve) (she/he)

- Joey (Fortnite: Battle Royale) (they/she)

- Joey's my main kin but more will be added with time

[carnivorous-canine98]

Really need to get this out in the open so... here's a list of my Oc's and some stuff about them.

Dusk

- Deathless (Original Species)

- Bisexual

- Relationship status: Married (open marriage)

- Purely Pred, prey in very rare circumstances

- Gives off sumg bitch energy tenfold

- Very tall (6'11) and very well built

- Decent singer and very skilled violinist (Was the one who taught Dax how to play)

- Likes the taste of human food, but it offers her no nutritional value. She specifically dines on blood and raw flesh.

- Is able to gage a person moral spectrum by a single drop of blood (meaning she knows if you're good or not)

- Works as a bounty hunter as she prefers the taste of blood and meat of those who are evil

- Abilities lean heavily into shadow manipulation, magic use, and hand to hand combat

Astra

- Kitsune

- Lesbian

- Relationship staus: Married (open marriage)

- Purely pery, pred in rare circumstances

- Is an advid prankster

- Loves to sing

- Very much a foodie (have a curvy figure)

- Tends to be willing for only her wife when it comes to vore. If anyone tries to eat her, expect a very angry fox

- Middle of three sisters

- Abilities lean into very strong, tangible illusions and petty tricks

Storm

- Kitsune

- Aro/Ace

- Relationship Status: Not interested

- Never pred/prey

- Has a no-nonsense attitude

- Very easily annoyed/angered

- Very well bluit and lean

- Youngest of three sisters

- Abilities lean into the control of lightning and manipulation of earth and rock

Aurora

- Kitsune

- Straight/Asexual

- Relationship Status: Single

- Very, very rarely pred/prey. Only lets those who she trusts deeply eat her. She will freak out and have a bad panic attack if anyone she doesn't know well enough tries to eat her

- Is a complete pacifist, fighting when absolutely necessary

- Is a gentle soul at heart, gives off mother vibs

- Very skilled in the Arcane

- Oldest of three sisters

- Abilities lean into time control and ice manipulation

Nariah Goldenfellow

- Half high elf/Half drow (dark elf)

- Demisexual

- Relationship Status: Single (depends on what I'm tossing her into)

- Purely pery, occasionally pred in rare circumstances

- Kind, but also very much a smart ass

- Is not afraid to speak her mind.

- Has a knack for pulling pranks. (Good friends with Astra because of it)

- Is an absolutely beautiful singer

- Is an angel in disguise (died during an epic adventure and was made into an angel for deeds done)

- Is very well skilled in the limited Arcane and Divine magic she has access to.

Caldax (Dax) Dalana

- Drow (Dark Elf)

- Trans (Female to Male)/Pansexual

- Relationship Status: Single

- Purely pery, pred in very rare circumstances

- Is a very timid boy (particularly scared around his own kind)

- Very easy to make blush and easily flustered

- Very much nearsighted, wears enchanted glasses given by Aurora (his mentor/adoptive mother)

- A heavy bookworm (Will talk your ear off if given the chance)

- Skilled artist and decent violinist

- Won't outright admit it, but is in love with his mentor Aurora.

- Is very skilled with the blade and highly skilled in the arcane.

Kiba (K, Ki)

- Chimera shifter

- Demisexual

- Relationship Status: Single

- Mostly pred, sometimes prey (only for specific people)

- Comes off as an asshole to most... but is a good guy at heart

- Was cursed long ago for royally pissing off an archfea (led to his chimera form), but is on better terms with them thanks to Nariah

- Is the Guardian for a forest with a very prominent portal to the fea relam. Tends to use scare tactics to drive poeple away from the forest

- Good friends with both Dax and Nariah

- Unable to digest live beings at all

- Very much loves tummy rubs, both in and out

- Highly skilled in Druidic magic and knows some arcane (Tends to shrink people in his human form when the mood hits him)

Lady Mea (Yes... you must call her that)

- Arcanaloth tiefling turned Archfiend (Tries her damnist to come off as a Kitsune)

- Omnisexual

- Relationship Status: Single

- Exclusively Pred, never, never ever prey...

- Absolutely hates her ture form and hides it. Will get extremely pissed if it's even so much as mentioned

- Is the very definition of Lawful Evil

- Is a deal maker

- Uses her charm and sex appeal to her advantage

- Despite being Lawful Evil, she lives by a very strict moral code.

- Is very willing to exploit any morally gery loopholes as possible

- Perfers to work with other evil humanoids, but will take on deals from good souls if they are desperate enough

- Nariah absolutely detests her, and she knows it

- Is highly afraid of Dusk for both her sheer raw strength and magical capability. She does her best to hide this fear.

- Very highly skilled in all forms of the Arcane

- She and Dusk are the only two characters I'm willing to explore hard vore/digestion with...

[gildead]

a stranger lucifer asked:

hi this is luci and i'd like to hear abt ... 5, 17, 10 and 18!

Vetra's Hot Munday Takes

5. dash commentary

I think it's pretty safe to say at this point that I'm a huge fan of dash commentary? It's one of the most fun ways for me to get involved in whatever conversation or event's going on on the dashboard, and it's led to some of the funniest shenanigans I've ever been involved in. A good example from this blog was the time when Ben and Gold were cursing up a storm, and you only need to go back a few pages to see how everyone got involved in some way or another.

If you're having trouble getting interactions, dash commentary and responding to open dash commentary posts are a great way to get your muse involved in some wild stuff. Just make sure the other person's good with that, obviously.

10. anons

Believe it or not, I've only gotten... one anon hate message in my entire RP career? It was back when I played as Wolf-- somebody sent me a message telling Wolf to kill himself? I think it was directed to him? Either way, it was really out of pocket and I ended up having to take the anon to task OOC because I was not in a good place during that time.

In my experience, anon hate has been really uncommon and that's partially because people are learning how to IP block and make fun of people hiding behind anon to be assholes, which is a trend that I hope keeps on going.

I'm not holding out hope it's gone entirely-- hell, I know there's gonna come a day where someone didn't read Gold's giant warning page/rules closely enough and is gonna come on anon crying because they didn't know the creepypasta muse was gonna do creepypasta things. The least I can do is cover my own ass.

17. fanon interpretations

This is specifically gonna be a Fire Emblem-related take, so if you have no idea what I'm talking about feel free to skip on down to 18.

I REALLY have found myself getting irritated when people on Twitter put a ton of analysis and thought into the Black Eagles and Blue Lions, but when it comes time for the Golden Deer they immediately get brushed off as 'hehe funny meme house' without the same amount of effort getting put into them. It's starting to get to the point where it's not cute anymore, it's annoying and dismissive as hell to Golden Deer fans. I myself am a Black Eagles stan and I think we should be giving them equal time and effort.

There's actually a LOT you can say about the Golden Deer from an analytical standpoint. Here, we have a house where practically nobody save Claude and maaaybe Hilda have any loyalties or ties keeping them to the Alliance and will jump ship without provocation. Perhaps it's the culture of self-preservation and backstabbing propagated by the nobility, where you feel like you can't get close to anybody without them using you for their own gain. Only through the player's direct intervention can these guys grow past that and work to create an Alliance that's more willing to work together than be at each other's throats.

...but sure, tell us about how Claude's the funny upside-down meme man for the fifty-morbillionth time in a row, I'm sure that joke hasn't gotten stale in the slightest.

18. shipping

The RPC's over-reliance on shipping can be really alienating for people trying to roleplay different types of muses.

Like, for example, Gold's dead AND a very young teenager. Aside from a very select pinchful of characters who are also dead and young teenagers, he's basically going to be locked out from any muse looking to ship. Even then, most shipping memes/relationship prompts are SO NSFW/romance-based that there's very little room for anyone who wants to write any other kind of relationship.

And that's not even limited to Gold. I'm talking muses who are minors, muses who are older than the early-mid 20s demographic most characters are in the RPC, aro/ace muses, nonhuman muses... it can be very tough to navigate the RPC when a lot of people are looking for shipping and it's oversaturated.

I think it's worth noting that there are plenty of non-shipping related relationships that get overlooked but are just as valid and rife with plot ideas. Like... Luci, you know what I'm talking about. Looks at your Jeralt and my Shez.

also gold's shipping rule is mostly in terms of smut/overly charged shit. i'm fine with 'awkward teen's first relationship' fluff. didn't know where to say that so i'm just dropping that in here.

[storm-coax]

just saying as a newly figured out loveless and partnering arospec person ANY type of aphobia is not welcome on this blog and will be blocked immediately. /gen /th

Yall might have seen me reblog that fuckwad with not a single braincell who made that poll asking if a aro cishet man is still considered queer and the fact that aspec identities are still are seen as lesser is disappointing. Luckily I haven't experienced that from this community specifically but I won't hesitate to block mfers who think like this. /gen

Also don't get me started on people who have cishets dni on their blogs cuz that is still exclusionary towards arospec people who don't define their sexuality and or gender but that rant is for another day (I'm also aware that it my not be that person's intention but still making the point /gen)

[with-love-from-hell]

5 Sides of Human

{Part Ten}

Genre: Mixed

Character profiles for the Mc’s featured in this series

WC: ~5.1k

CW: time skipping from main plot (I’m not doing certain parts of the canon story and/or are doing them out of order because I didn’t like them the way they were and it’s my story so there lol), brief appearance of Mephistopheles (but no spoilers), anxiety, depictions of anger and verbal aggression, sarcasm,  suggestive, love triangle, Storm has a stutter but I am not depicting it with written word consistently, pining, spoilers for season 1&2!

Part nine   <<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>    Part eleven

“Man...how’d I get stuck doin’ this?” Mammon mumbled, dragging his feet slightly behind Storm and No. 2 as they approached the entrance to the carnival.

“Well I can’t say I mind much though, because this means I get to be with Storm!” Little D No. 2 mocked, pretending to voice-over Mammon’s thoughts.

“Aye, quit it!” Mammon grumbled, shoving his hands in his pockets. “I thought I told ya to keep yer mouth shut!” 

Storm ignored their bickering, gazing up at the huge Ferris Wheel that stood adjacent to the gate. “It always amazes me that y’all have similar stuff in Devildom that we do in the Human realm.” 

“They got stuff like this in the Celestial Realm too.” Mammon smirked, turning his attention away from No. 2. He watched her gaze float around the tent-tops and various rides. “One time I took Beel and Belphie to a carnival under Michael’s nose, ‘n they were so happy...but then they wandered off and I couldn’t find them. It was a real pain in the ass.” 

“Probably because you weren’t keeping an eye on them in the first place.” No. 2 giggled, skipping happily along in front of the pair. 

“Shut it, pipsqueak.” Mammon gritted his teeth. “Remember, we’re doin’ ya a favor here! Ya should give me some respect!” 

Storm chuckled, shaking her head as Mammon attempted to scold the small demon, who was clearly not paying attention to anything he was saying. The carnival lights twinkled in the foggy night sky, creating a lazy hue of green, yellow, and purple over the pavement. Each tent held some sort of activity or food, and the air was filled with an aroma of fried food. The sounds of laughter, boisterous carnies advertising their games, and vacant chatter filled the streets, creating an abnormally full atmosphere in the usually quiet streets that surrounding the large park in the center of town. 

“So, What brings Diavolo and Lucifer here on an investigation?” She pondered aloud, trailing her fingers and the thick canvas tent they passed by. 

“Ohoho! Apparently it’s something very scandalous and exciting!” No. 2 turned to face them, now walking backwards blindly into the crowed. “You see, there’s this rumor that the carnival is actually a front for an illegal casino!” 

Mammon cleared his throat, turning away to try to hide the guilt plastered over his face. Storm took no notice, instead shrugging her shoulders in response. 

“I mean, isn’t that kind of what carnival games are already? They’re always rigged as fuck, and you’re basically placing a bet on whether you can win the game. The only difference is that you get a shitty prize instead of the bets placed.” 

“W-well, it’s not like I know anythin’ about some illegal casino o-or nothin’ of course.” Mammon swallowed hard, darting his gaze between No. 2 and Storm, who both raised an eyebrow at him. 

“We didn’t ask if you knew anything...” No. 2 narrowed their eyes, causing Mammon to begin to sweat nervously. 

“A-actually, y’know what? I completely forgot that I got this, uh...thing...to do tonight, so...I-I can’t come with ya to find Lucifer and Diavolo after all!” Mammon turned on his heel, beginning to speed walk the other direction. 

“Wha- wait!! Mammon!” Storm turned, jogging to catch up with him. “You can’t just leave me here!” 

“W-well, Lucifer’s here...he’ll find ya eventually.” 

“That’s not very responsible of you, Mammon...” No. 2 scolded. “Losing both of us in one day? It’s a wonder you don’t get turned around in your own house.” 

Mammon growled, turning to try to walk away again. Though, he stopped when he felt a gentle tug on his jacket sleeve. He felt his face heat up as Storm’s hand slipped into his, her fingers curling around his own. He swallowed hard and coughed into his arm to hide the growing heat on his cheeks. 

“Mammon, please...” Storm murmured, trying to fight off the ruminating fears of being left alone, surrounded by strangers in an unfamiliar place. “Please stay...” 

Mammon groaned, stealing a glance into Storm’s shimmering icy eyes. Maybe it was the twinkling lights that gave her the cutest puppy-like expression he had ever seen, but regardless of the reason, he found it near impossible to refuse her. “Agh, Dammit...Fine. I’ll stay, okay! Ya happy now?! And stop lookin at me like that!” 

No. 2 let out a high pitched laugh, nearly squealing in delight. “I love how you’re such a pushover Mammon!” 

“Shaddup!” Mammon snapped, pointing threateningly at No. 2. “Ya best watch yer mouth, pipsqueak, or yer gonna have a date with the underside of my shoe!” 

Storm smiled, squeezing his hand to get his focus back to her.  “Thank you, Mams.” 

Mammon snorted in faux disdain, turning his head away as the blush darkened. “whatever, let’s just find them and go home.”

They walked side-by-side through the gates of the carnival, trying to see if the fur on Lucifer’s coat collar or the bright red pattern on Diavolo’s suit-jacket could be seen amongst the crowd. Suddenly, a bright flash of light caused both Storm and Mammon’s vision to go white for a moment, creating spots around their vision as they rubbed their eyes clear. 

“Oi! What the hell was that!” Mammon darted his vision around, trying to get a glimpse of what had flashed right in front of them. 

“Aw, what a perfect picture for the Newspaper club Devilgram,” The magenta-haired demon before them remarked, before snatching a polaroid out of the fanny pack at his side. “That’ll be 100 Grimm.” 

“Excuse me!?” Mammon snapped. “Mephisto! What the hell’re ya doin?!”

“Now now, Mammon. It’s his job to take your picture...and then pressure you into buyin’ it.” No. 2 chuckled, snatching the photo from Mephistopheles’ hands and running off with it. 

“No. 2! Get yer tiny ass back here!” Mammon yelled after the demon, attempting to run after him only to be caught by the collar. 

“I believe I said you owed 100 Grimm.” Mephistopheles growled, holding out his other hand for payment. 

“I didn’t ask ya to take our picture!” 

“Well, they seemed to want the photo,” he smirked. “Besides, I’m sure such a cute couples picture will make many folks quite jealous.” 

“C-couple?!” Mammon stuttered, his face turning red once more. “W-well...I...” 

“It’s fine, Mammon. I got it.” Storm sighed, digging in her purse and fishing out a large golden coin. “Here. Thank you for the picture.” 

Mephistopheles snatched the coins out of Storm’s hand flashing her a fake smile. “The pleasure is all mine, human.” 

"Uh, you know my name. It’s Storm.” She corrected, narrowing her eyes at him. Mephistopheles ignored her, strolling off with his camera already pointed at newly arriving visitors. She sighed, turning back toward Mammon, only to fine he had ran off. She saw the tips of his snowy white hair near the entry to a nearby game, rushing over to meet him there.

“...And Storm looks crazy cute, doesn’t she? So you should really be thanking me for forcing you to buy it!” No. 2 squirmed around in Mammon’s iron grasp, trying desperately to escape his hold. 

Mammon’s gaze appeared to be transfixed on the photo as Storm approached from behind him. “Hmm...well, I guess it did turn out pretty good...” 

“You can say she looks cute, c’mon!” No. 2 teased, kicking Mammon in the chest. “I know you’re thinking how much you wanna smooch her!”

“Stop that!” Mammon shook No. 2, causing him to be a bit disoriented. “Stop sayin’ what I’m thinkin’ out loud!” 

Storm blinked, surprised to hear Mammon admit to having thought she was cute. She’d be lying if she’d said she hadn’t had a crush on him in the past. She thought Mammon was sweet at times, but her interest in him diminished the more his insults and degradation stung her already sensitive self-esteem. Her breaking point was after the incident in the catacombs, where he had told her to die if he couldn’t be the one to save her. The comment wounded her more than anything he had said to her before, and it still haunted her thoughts to this day- particularly when he was being incredibly cold toward her. 

“Um...” Storm squeezed near Mammon’s side, taking a look at the picture, “did it really turn  out good?” 

Mammon jumped, letting out a yelp when he felt her presence near his side. No. 2 fell to the ground with a grunt as Mammon’s grip on him faltered. Storm glanced at the picture for a moment, not really seeing how her half-closed eyes and blurry arm coming up to shield her face could be counted as ‘cute.’

“Listen, I know this is a really forward, impolite sort of question, but just out of curiosity...” No. 2 batted their eyelashes, “Storm, Mammon...Are you two dating?” 

Mammon coughed aggressively at the unexpected question, his face immediately burning crimson at the question. He watched Storm out of the corner of his eye, trying to gauge how she would respond. He knew that they weren’t dating, but he hoped deep down she would say yes- just to spare him the embarrassment of having to ask her out himself. 

“What..? No.” Storm shook her head, her voice flat. “Why would you think that?”

Mammon’s expression dropped, feeling hurt that she had said ‘no’ so plainly. 

“Right, of course you’re not.” No. 2 began laughing maniacally. “He is Mammon, after all. You could do much better, Storm.” 

“Wait, what!?” Mammon snapped, attempting to snatch No. 2 up by their neck once more, but No. 2 dodged his grip.

“Well, Storm! As long as you’re single, what do you think of Lord Diavolo, hmm?” No. 2 nudged her forearm playfully. “I can assure you, he’s quite the catch, and he’s very rich so you wont ever have to worry about money. And he’s such a hunk- I mean, those Muscles?! Phew-wee! Plus you will have the very attentive Barbatos as your own steward as an added bonus!” 

Storm blinked a few times, trying to process what No. 2 had said after speaking so quickly. Before she had a chance to speak, Mammon butted in. 

“There’s so much messed up about what ya just said that I don’t even know where to start.” Mammon huffed, stuffing his hands back in his jacket pocket. “Ya really think someone like Storm could get with the prince of Devildom?” 

Storm flashed Mammon a hurt glance, causing him to immediately glance down in shame. There’s a moment of tense silence between them, before No. 2 suddenly gasps. 

“Oooh! Look! They have a crane game over there!” They skipped giddily toward the tent, tugging Storm’s pant leg along with them. “Oh! And check out the stuffed animals inside. Those are zombie iguanas, one of the hottest items in Devildom right now!” 

“Oh, they’re cute!” Storm noted, following No. 2 toward the booth to get a closer look. 

“C-cute? Those things??” Mammon scrunched up his nose. “Their so ugly!” 

“They’re so adorable I can barely stand it!” No. 2 squealed. 

“You two certainly have weird tastes...” Mammon scoffed, finally catching up to them at the booth.

“Mammon! I want one! Win one for me! Pleassseee?” No. 2 begged, hopping up and down in front of him. 

“What!?” Mammon barked, shaking his head. “No way! We’re s’posed to be finding Lucifer and Diavolo! No playin’ games!”

“C’monnnnnn! Papa! Please please Papa! I want one so bad I can barely stand it! Pleeeaaassee!” 

“G’AHH! Fine!” Mammon threw up his hands, grabbing the baseballs sitting on the booth counter. “If it gets ya to shut yer damn mouth, I’ll do it.” 

He tossed 20 Grimm to the carnie before whipping three balls at once toward the totems stacked at the end of the booth’s range. After knocking over the totem on the first attempt, Mammon presented the zombie ignuana doll to No. 2.

“Eeeeee! Finally!” No. 2 clutched the doll tightly, spinning around with it. “My very own zombie iguana! Thanks papa! I love you soooooo much!” 

Mammon kicked No. 2 away as he tried to hug him. “Quit callin’ me papa, dammit! I barely had any money to begin with and now I’m really poor!” 

Storm giggled as No. 2 writhed about on the floor, happily singing about their new iguana. 

“Hey...uh, Storm...” Mammon pulled her aside, shoving another zombie iguana in her arms. “I feel bad about sayin’ what I said earlier...y’know, about you ‘n Diavolo...so I managed to nab an extra plushie and...here. It’s yours.” 

Storm smiled, accepting the plushie carefully. She squeezed it lightly, finding comfort in the give that the soft spandex material and light stuffing allowed. Her smile grew warmer as she looked into Mammon’s eyes. “I love it. Thanks, Mams.” 

“I-I wasn’t tryn’a win it for ya or nothin’...it just...happened, okay?” Mammon turned away, beginning to walk the other direction as Storm called out to No. 2 and followed behind him.

“I’d assume if there was an entry to a hidden gambling den, it would be in plain sight, wouldn’t you agree?” Diavolo murmured to Lucifer as they walked into the gates of the Carnival, narrowly avoiding Mephistopheles and his Newspaper Club photo op. 

“If I know anything about Mammon and demons like him, that much should be true.” Lucifer glanced around, hoping to spot some suspicious activity right off the bat. “Though I will say, Mammon has a knack for being sneaky, so we shouldn’t rule anything out. While it may be obvious, we don’t want to underestimate their intelligence.” 

Diavolo chuckled. “Intelligence, huh? That wouldn’t be the first thing to come to mind when thinking of Mammon. 

Lucifer held back the urge to glare at the prince for insulting his brother. “Yes. Mammon can be dense in a lot of ways- that is surely true- but If there’s one way he shines it’s with numbers, and he is quick with it too. I’m assuming we must be looking for something related to numbers, or the passcode is something to do with numbers.” 

Diavolo nodded, impressed by Lucifer’s ability to so obviously dot on his brother’s strengths despite his cold exterior toward them normally. They first walked around the perimeter of the park, then worked their way inwards, interviewing carnies for what they may know casually, and watching more seedy demons make their rounds of the carnival. After an hour, they both sat for a break. 

“Would you like anything to eat, Lucifer? I may help myself to some Black Tapir bacon on a stick.”  Diavolo hummed at the thought. “I figure this can be some time for you to review the evidence we’ve gathered.” 

Lucifer shuddered at the thought, finding the choice in food to be atrocious. “I’ll do fine with a bottle of water, though I don’t like the idea of you wandering off. I’ll join you.” 

“Nonsense. I will just be at the booth here- so sit back and rest for a moment, would you? Just looking at you is giving me back pain.” Diavolo laughed and sauntered off to the booth only a few feet away, Leaving Lucifer alone near some benches and tables. 

With a resided sigh, Lucifer sat and pulled out his notes, flipping through the comments scratched onto the paper. He sighed, rubbing his temple as he tried to put the pieces together, but the constant pinging of his phone was becoming incessant enough to push him over the edge. He quickly pulled out his DDD in an attempt to silence it, only to see a flood of notifications in the group chat with his brothers. 

--

Asmodeus:   Did you guys see the picture RAD Newspaper’s Devilgram just posted!? 

Beelzebub:   No. Why?

Asmodeus:   It’s Storm and Mammon! Their on a date!!!! 

Satan:    😲

Belphegor:   😲

Leviathan:   Lol no their not, stop joking around. Mammon and Storm? Come on now, she’s smarter than that.

Asmodeus:   I’m serious! Go look!

--

Lucifer found his curiosity piqued, and immediately went to his Devilgram app. What had originally intended to be a simple silencing of his notifications turned into a hunt for the post Asmodeus was talking about. After scrolling for a few moments, he found the picture, immediately feeling his heart plummet into his Stomach.  The photo was blurry, and seemed ordinary for the most part, other than the obvious way Storm and Mammon were holding hands as they entered the carnival together. 

Lucifer gritted his teeth, feeling jealousy well up in his stomach as the notifications in the group chat kept pinging, each brother expressing their interest in disrupting the date. Lucifer felt half a mind to search for them as well- to interrupt their date, or even ruin it by taking Mammon away for questioning about the Casino. For a moment, he felt an evil smile curl onto his lips when imagining pulling the two apart from each other, but shook it away when he realized how petty it was. 

Storm is only a human. There’s no reason why she should make you feel this way, and you certainly don’t need to be jealous that one of your brothers has her on their arm...

...And yet...

Lucifer sighed as he tried to push away the conflicting emotions welling in his chest. He muted his phone, shoving it deep into his pocket just as Diavolo plopped down on the bench across from him, fried tapir in hand. 

“So, any leads yet?” Diavolo handed Lucifer a bottle of water before tearing into the tapir, continuing to talk with his mouth full. “The Carnie near the haunted house seemed suspicious.” 

Lucifer nodded, though winced when some of the tapir flew out of Diavolo’s mouth and onto the table. “I was thinking about circling back to the area and looking around.” 

Diavolo nodded. “Then I suppose we should maneuver our way back there.”

Lucifer nodded, taking a sip of his water. He decided to keep the fact that Storm and Mammon were present at the fair a secret for now, and perhaps he would run into them near the haunted house- given it was not far off from the entry of the carnival, and the photo on Devilgram was merely 20 minutes old. With Mammon’s distractibility and desires to impress Storm, he figured they could not have gone too far into the Carnival yet. 

Storm anxiously walked closer to Mammon’s side, having found herself growing more unsettled the larger the crowd around her got. A passing family rushed past toward the popcorn booth, causing Storm to stumble into him. 

“Whoa, hey now. Careful, Storm.” Mammon steadied her upright. “What’s the big idea? Cant ya walk straight?” 

“S-sorry Mammon.” Storm rubbed her forearm. “I’m just not fond of crowds.” 

He let out a heavy sight, snatching Storm’s hand in his. “ Alright, well...I s’pose someone outta keep ya safe. Stay close to me, got it?” 

“Oh, uh...Thank you.” Storm smiled politely, gripping his hand tighter. 

“Oh how cuuutee!” No. 2 squished their cheeks. “It’s like you two are star crossed lovers!” 

Mammon groaned. “I almost forgot we had this pipsqueak taggin’ along...It makes serarchin’ for Lord Diavolo much more annoying”

“Where should we look for them next?” Storm glanced at the nearby attractions, standing on her tippy-toes to try to see over the crowd. 

No. 2 jumped up and down to try to see as well. “Well, if we knew where the Casino was, maybe we’d find them faster.” 

“It moves every year so that’s gonna be a challenge.” Mammon shrugged. “That’s how they avoid being caught.” 

“You seem to know a lot about this Casino Mammon.” Storm raised an eyebrow at him. 

Mammon averted his gaze, stumbling over his words. “N-no! I don’t know nothin’!” 

“Maybe they went into one of the attractions...like that!” No. 2 rushed off through the crowd, pausing in the doorway of a large building. “C’mon!”

Storm and Mammon glanced at each other briefly before rushing after No. 2. The hall they entered into was dark, only lit by a single, flickering red light. Mammon gulped as they passed by a thick black curtain, seeing the walls coated in what appeared to be splattered blood, and hanging skeletons lining the ceiling. 

“W-wait, what are we doin’ in a haunted house!?” Mammon yelped as his shoulder grazed a spooky-looking statue. 

“Well the Casino was in the house of Mirrors last year, which is right next door. So I was thinking maybe they’d move it here!” No. 2 skipped off, their voice echoing down the corridor as he beckoned them toward him. 

“Hey- No! Get your tiny ass back here!” Mammon shouted, wincing when his voice reverberated off the walls. He began to whimper, clutching Storm’s arm. “I wanna go home! Now!”

“Mammon, relax.” Storm squeezed his hand. “We’ll just go through it quick and get it over with.” 

Mammon groaned, hiding behind Storm as they walked through the maze-like house. Mammon winced and yelped at every jump scare that came from every crevasse, jerking Storm’s arm violently with each action. The house was cheesy to Storm, having been in many of haunted houses scarier than this in the past. She wondered if perhaps the demons did haunted houses like this mostly for fun or as a laugh, but it was clear that things like this definitely did scare certain demons.

“M-m-make sure ya don’t let go of my hand, got it!?” Mammon squeezed tightly, causing Storm to wince in pain. “No matter what!” 

“Don’t worry. I wont.” Storm tried to give him a reassuring smile through the discomfort of having him gripping her so tightly. “We’re almost half-way through, so hold on.” 

“T-thank you Storm. Ya don’t ever let me down and it’s just...amazing. I definitely don’t tell ya that enough.” Mammon yelped as a skeleton suddenly dropped in front of him with a loud cackling laugh, bumping into Storm and nearly toppling her over to the ground. Storm managed to catch him and realign him upright, now wondering if his idea of holding hands was more for his sake than hers.  

He pushes her along toward the next room, hugging Storm so tightly to where she could barely move or breathe. She was about to give a response, but as they approached the next doorway, A small figure jumped out with a boisterous, ghostly ‘Boo.’

Mammon screamed at the top of his lungs, causing Storm to wince in pain at the shrill noise triggering her tinnitus. He lurched forward, jumping over No. 2, who lay on the floor in the doorway laughing maniacally. Unfortunately for Storm, she was dragged along with him, stumbling and tripping to the floor on top of Mammon. 

“L-let go, Storm! I know I said not to but I changed my mind. I need to get away- NOW!” Mammon tried shaking her loose, aggressively whipping her arm around.

“Ow- Mammon! Fuckin’ Stop!” Storm yelled, smacking him in the chest. “It was just No. 2! Calm the hell down!” 

“How could you possibly be frightened by that?” No. 2 cackled, leaping onto Mammon’s lap. “That was pathetic. Seriously.” 

Mammon paused his movements for a moment, before again trying to pry his hand free from Storm’s. “Ah- wait. Storm! I can’t let go!” 

“Oooh how romantic!” No. 2 teased, only to be flung off of Mammon’s lap and into the adjacent wall. 

“No, not like that. I mean our hands are stuck together- Look!” Mammon tried once more to yank his hand free, causing Storm to curse loudly at the sound of her shoulder popping. 

“Fucking OW! I believe you, alright! Now stop before you yank my arm out of it’s damn socket, Mammon!!” 

“Is it some kind of curse or somethin’!?” 

“Well even if it is, we can just have Lucifer lift it so you’ve got nothing to worry about.” No. 2 brushed himself off and approached, helping Storm and Mammon to their feet. 

Mammon let out an exasperated sigh. “Fine, but we better find them quick then. Lets get out of here.” 

Several minutes of wandering around the house turned into 10, then 20. Storm grew more and more agitated the more No. 2 tried playing on Mammon’s fear, having her arm jerked in several directions and Mammon’s shrill screaming echoing through her head. The area behind her eyes pulsated in pain, threatening the production of a migraine if she didn’t get out of this situation soon. Eventually, they came across a blood-stained room, the floors of it covered with various fake limbs, organs, and other body parts. Mammon jumped, nearly clinging to Storm like a koala as a voice echoed over the loudspeakers from above. 

“Within this chamber, the strength of your bond shall be tested.”

 Storm narrowed her eyes, glancing around the room to take stock of her surroundings. 

“To know each other is to know yourself. So let us find out how well you know each other...” 

“What the hell is it talkin’ about.” Mammon whined, hugging Storm tighter. 

The voice went over the instructions, indicating the “game” they would play was similar to that of a gameshow. It would ask 2 questions, and each would have to be answered correctly by the individual asked. If any question would be answered incorrectly, they would be killed by a hoard of zombies. 

“Wait, we’re not seriously going to die over some game...right?” Storm glanced at Mammon nervously, who merely shrugged his shaky shoulders. She sighed, straightening her posture. “Fine. Bring it on.” 

“Storm, wait! I-” 

“First question,” the voice continued, “Storm- answer me this. Mammon once won a figurine as a prize in a convenience store campaign. having no interest in it, he left it on the floor of his room and forgot about it. What was the name of the figurine?”

“What? That’s a stupid question.” Storm murmured in annoyance, crossing her arms. “How the fuck am I supposed to know that? And what does it have to do with our bond?!” 

“You have 5 seconds to answer.” 

“I think it was Seraphina, or something..? I don’t fucking know!”  

“Correct.” 

Mammon raised his eyebrows, impressed.  “Wow, I didn’t even remember that.”

“Mammon, I just guessed.” Storm grumbled, annoyed at this seemingly useless test. 

“Mammon, your turn. Answer me this.” Mammon shuddered, gripping Storm’s hand tightly. “During the group retreat at the Demon Lord’s Castle, Storm danced with Lucifer. Who did she dance with after him?” 

He blushed, turning his gaze downcast. “That would be Solomon.” 

“Correct.” 

Storm raised an eyebrow at him. “And you remember that...why?” 

Mammon rolled his eyes in anger. “’Cuz I asked ya to dance first!! But then Lucifer butted in and then-” 

Storm shook her head. “Okay, whatever. It doesn’t matter. We got our questions right, so we’re free to go then...right?” 

“Unfortunately for you, I have no control over the zombies.”

“Wait, what!?” Storm yelled angrily as the door they entered in burst open, spewing thousands of grotesque looking undead creatures into the room. The quality of whatever spell or animatronic was behind them increased 10-fold, causing storm to finally become alarmed at the thought of being torn to shreds.

Mammon screamed, burying his head into her neck. For once, storm accompanied him- stumbling backwards and gripping him just as tightly. 

“Storm! If we die, I just want ya to know that I love you! M-more than I have ever loved anyone!” Mammon squeaked into her shoulder as the groans and roars grew closer. 

Before she could answer, the noises suddenly stopped, and the room they were in completely changed. Before them was the exit, the sign above shining in bright green letters over the doorway. glimmers of light could be seen around the edges of the curtain, and the sounds of laughter and chatter could be heard from outside. Mammon quickly pulled Storm through, again jerking her around rather roughly. They stumbled outside, both panting in sync with the now relieving tension caused by that final scare. 

“Jesus, that was fucked up.” Storm coughed, brushing her hair out of her face as she tried to regain her composure.

“Oh hey! There you are! Finally!” No. 2 sauntered up to them. “You guys took so forever!” 

“What the- Where the hell were you!?” Mammon roared, pulling No. 2 up by the neck, pausing when seeing the sweet treat in their hands. “And where the hell did you get ice cream!”

No. 2 giggled. “I got it while I was waiting for you, duh.”

“I’M GONNA KILL YOU, RUNT.” Mammon screamed, shaking No. 2 aggressively.” 

“Ahh! Wait!” No. 2 yelled, dropping the ice cream and shielding their face. “I found Lucifer and Diavolo while I was waiting for you!” 

“Oh yeah? And where are they?” Storm asked, unamused by their lack of presence. 

“Th-they’re over by the roller coaster!” No. 2 paused. “Or...maybe by the bumper cars.” 

“So that’s what this is about then.” Storm shook her head. “You just wanted us to take you on the rides and pay for it because Barbatos wouldn’t let you come here.” 

No. 2′s expression dropped as they twisted their fingers together. “Y-yeah...I’m sorry...But I’m not lying about Lucifer and Diavolo being somewhere at the fair!” 

Storm sighed. “Whatever. Regardless, I think I need a break to sit for a minute.” 

“Me too. Let’s go over there.” Mammon pointed in the direction of the Ferris Wheel briefly before dropping No. 2 and tugging Storm along. “And ya ain’t comin’ with us.” 

Mammon stuck out his tongue and made a fart noise at No. 2 as he and storm scrambled into a cart at were immediately lifted into the air. Storm held her breath, unsure if Mammon knew that this wasn’t her idea of taking a break due to her fear of heights. 

“Heh, good thing we finally managed to lose that lil’ brat.” Mammon snickered, looking out into the skyline. “And check out this view. You can see all of Devildom from up here!” 

“Mmhm. Yep.” Storm swallowed hard, staring at her feet to avoid seeing how high up they were. “Very pretty.

Mammon slouched in his seat breathing a content sigh. “Y’know, everything is so much more fun when yer around, Storm. It was so boring without ya here.” 

Storm scoffed. “Really? I don’t really believe that. I’m nowhere near as exciting to be around as Sarah or Fern.” 

“Well, they’re fun too...but in a different way.” Mammon squeezed her hand. “I mean it when I say things were boring without ya.” 

Storm bit her lip and nodded, catching Mammon’s glance briefly before staring back down at her feet. The rest of the ride was completed in a tense silence, the excitement from today already catching up to her before they again touched the ground. 

[clit-eastwood-spicy]

02, 11, 30, 57, 67 😎

2. My dog shockingly lmao

11. Idr if I've ever mentioned it but like I'm hella Aro/Ace so like irl no but I've been insane about Itachi Uchiha lately (his post-death backstory nailed my ass so hard and now he's on my stinky brain a lot) udshfsudhf

30. Rolling power outs due to the storm here and this massive headache I've had all day (likely also due to said storm dushfsdf)

57. I believe in the idea of like soulmates but in a very specific like... "I've known your soul before and I pray I shall know it again and again in every life beyond" sorta vibes.

67. My brother when he was in town and offered to buy me cheese. My dog attacked him (lovingly) the entire time before he left.

[slow-drowned-angels]

Look the sequel is objectively worse but it’s also hilarious and if you watch it as a comedy it’s so much better.

Then again, I watched the original in Mandarin and so I did not understand like… the big exposition-y speeches that were made… because they were largely in more formal Chinese than I know. So uh. That probably didn’t help. I watched the sequel in Mandarin dub with English subtitles so it made more sense… ish.

Also I watched them out of order so that probably helped.

Spoilers:

Just like watching the fight scenes and being like “oh! I guess ALL the side characters are just dying now? Cool that’s A Decision.” Hilarious. Why. What. Okay cool whatever.

What the fuck are these romantic pairing who have so little chemistry or evident desire to be together???? As an aro I found it amusing. It was also preferable to the first movie where there was a lot more kissing and pining and sex scenes.

I love the “guy dressed in black sits in the corner of a restaurant and is a badass” trope so much. Silent Wolf is such a character.

Okay what the fuck is the prophet’s deal. Why does she just Show Up and cause mischief and then die and no one gives a shit about why she did anything. Who is she. Why can she Do Stuff Like That. ?????? It would make so much more sense if she didn’t leave a body at the end or something. But no. She’s a mortal ass human.

That ice fight scene? Why. Doesn’t make sense weather-wise. But damn did it look cool.

They were unable to defend their own town (and why did the enemy people stop fighting again? They looked like they were winning? Huh?) but then decide that like… six of them can storm the enemy town and apparently they can!

Why is it like this. It’s so funny. I love it.

[raccooninthedaytime]

Hey Juliet! This is me sharing this webcomic with the mutuals in hopes of finding a friend to talk with about it, we got:

Fun cute fantasy with traces of eldritch horror

Author is red from OSP

Ace (possibly aro) protagonist with a cool ass sword

Adorable cotton candy elf with a nightmare-inducing powerset

The most pathetically pompous ass (affectionate) you’ve ever seen

Emotionally repressed catboy

Random lady who steals and vivisects souls

Evil pile of corrosive goop that wants to eat the sun

Storm god that is also a theater kid

Cute art style

LOTS of cool worldbuilding

Read it it’s literally so good omg

I will read it right away my friend this sounds like it SLAPs