#stupid big doggo boy

[ghostly-gator-snek]

You good fam

[anime-grimmy]

Trigun hyperfixation has an iron grip on me and I desperately need to get my head to think of something else. Especially cos I crave so much for good stories but to my suprise, a lot of (vashmeryl) fanfics I read are extremely samey, especially the post-anime ones.

That being said, while reading, I was actually suprised to see a few scenarios or themes never explored? So I thought, since I can't get my brain to focus anyways, might as well drop some vashmerly hcs and prompts.

the one I'm most suprised has not been explored at all is Meryl and Milly trying to teach Vash how to actually talk/flirt with women. I still dunno how Vash came to be known as a womamizer in the og anime cos he is abyssmal when it comes to flirting. So, after an especially embarassing rejection, Meryl picks a fight with Vash as usual and he's all like "yeah, then you show me how it's done." Not one to chicken out on a competition (and with avid encouragement by Milly) they set up a fake date. I can totally see it going really funny, Meryl trying her darn hardest to act like an actually interested date but can't help herself from cringing and and scoffing at how stupid Vash' approaches are. So basically, it would be a mix of silly flirting and a lot of bantering. By the end Meryl admits that he's not half bad if he just turns down the goofiness a bit, mentioning if he just ties up the night nicely he might even score a second date (she means in general, not realizing that it sounds like she's implying a date with her). Cue Vash doing the only smooth move in his life and stealing a goodnight kiss, asking "well, did it work?"

less of a prompt or headcanon, but in all the scar-centric fics Ive read, not once is it mentioned how Vash has a literal cage over his heart? Ive always loved this little design aspect, since it so obviously shows Vash fortifying his heart and keeping everyone out. I can also see Meryl being all smug like "well, im small and nimble, and the spaces between the bars are wide, I can easily slip through"

another funny thought about the metal grids on his body would be them cuddling but Meryl's hair gets caught on the metal and now they have to akwardly maneuver out of this situation

Meryl uses any and all situations to be taller than Vash. Since she is so much smaller than him, she usually stands when he sits, especially when they argue, tries to be just a few stairs above him or walks a few more steps up a slop so she can peer down on him. Not that her presence isn't big enough already, but she for sure tries her hardest to assert dominance.

To her dismay, Vash likes to use this moments to pick her up. I dunno why, but since Meryl is so small I can see Vash just enjoying it to pick her up and twirl her around. Lugging her around like a pretty looking sack of potatoes.

Vash is a human pretzel. He will contort his body in ways to hug as much of Meryl as possible.

Meryl becomes incredibly good at ignoring Vash if she needs to work. She could be sitting at her typewriter, only noticing Vash has her in a vice grip when Milly asks if she isn't distracted.

Despite how spiky it looks, Vash' hair is actually pretty soft and fluffy, and once Meryl finds out she uses any opportunity to run her fingers through it. Vash doesn't mind cos he totally digs the head scratches (humanoid typhoon? more like humanoid doggo)

when traveling together, they usually share a thomas cos Vash can't ride for shit. Vash likes to be dramatic and complain about it (cos he's a big boy thank you very much) but he can't deny that he wholly enjoys being cuddled up behind Meryl for hours on end.

Welp, just some food for thought cos my brain is in Trigun overdrive. These are specifically based on the 98 versions of them but I have a whole lot for Stampede as well haha

[chihuahuawashere]

Guide dog!

As kids Perona and Kuina tried everything they can to make sure that Zoro doesn’t get lost. As big sisters it was their duty to make sure that their little brother is safe.

But they didn’t realize how hard the job will be. He’ll be practicing with his wooden swords one second and in the blink of an eye his gone. Literally /poof/ and the girls panic every single time. And don’t get then wrong they really tried everything.

They tried teaching him how to read a map and how to tell form his left to his right but nothing really seems to click for him. It’s like his brain was switched on backwards or there was no switch in that part of his brain.

Which was so confusing to them because he’s a really smart kid academically from reading to writing to math but this one life skill that he needs in order to survive isn’t working and it’s making his sisters more and more worried as they get older.

One day when Perona and Kuina had to wash the clothes in the river zoro really did wonder off and he was deep into the woods. And it took /hours/ to try and find him and once the sun has long set and it was dark dark they finally found Zoro chilling with some birds. And Perona had had enough she yelled “He just doesn’t want to walk in a straight line! It’s so simple” she really snapped at him for it. She thought that this was a cruel running joke and was over it.

And zoro being the baby brother was really shocked up by with and didn’t talk for a whole week after that. Honestly was just too scared to miss up and get yelled at again.

Kuina as the older sister scolded her and made her apologize and made Zoro apologize for running off (again)

But they were back at square one again. And honest to god they really tried everything they tired: 

At first it was holding on to one of their hands as they walk but he’ll get embarrassed and let go and wonder off

They’ll even from a line and hold onto rope kinda of like a kindergarten line (Kuina in the front Zoro in the middle and Perona in the back) but Zoro would still wonder off.

From having a backpack leash on him. (He takes it off and runs) he thinks that there to stupid looking

Trying tie rope on one hand and tying to one of there own hands (he CHEWS off the rope) and runs

They even had a backpack with a hole in it. And with the hole had dirt rocks dried petals anything so that when he ran off there’d be a trail behind him. It kinda of worked until he took it and the trail ran cold.

They even tried making little cards for him to carry and when he was lost to give it to someone so they can help him find his way back home. It’ll have his name his sisters name and their address. But that never worked because zoro was to prideful to admit when he was wrong

At this point Kuina and Perona were 15 and Zoro was 14 and he was getting really tired of his village and was looking for a was to run away any minute. And they still haven’t found a way to keep Zoro from getting lost.

That was until one day when Perona and Kuina were walking back home after being done grocery shopping they heard barking and splashing. Turns out some evil little kids were trying to drown a puppy in the river. Perona and Kuina dropped their bags and chased after the boys. Perona isn’t afraid to square up with and elementary schoolers.

While Perona was WWE body slamming the kids into one another Kuina ran into the river to safe the mutt. Once the kids were crying their way back to mommy Perona grabbing all the bags so Kuina can carry the tried wet pup back home.

To their surprise Zoro actually stayed home for once instead of running off. And he’s sure glad he did! He got to see a doggy! After helping Kuina wash him off and helping Perona make some food for the puppy they decided to keep the doggo.

But instead of imprinting on Kuina the pup imprinted on Zoro! But the dog acted just like he older sisters. Also tugging on Zoros shirt to go one way or bumping them head on Zoros leg to go another way and even fact snapping it get Zoros attention. And making sure that he followed his sisters.

It was like the dog /knew/ that zoro couldn’t walk in a straight line. And soon after the little puper became Zoros guide dog! And Perona and Kuina never really had to worry so much about him. They still worry don’t get them wrong! But they have one less thing to worry about now!

[brandnewhuman]

Hey, can I get a match for some slasher?♥️ (sorry if i'm doing it wrong💀)

i'm 5'2 tall (my native language is not english so if miss anything i'm sorry again) i'm gender fluid and i go for all pronouns, i have light blonde hair but they are dyed, i always put on vibrant colors in my hair, i have green eyes and my skin is kinda pale🚶 my hair is kinda short, i change a lot of style but for now i'm LOVING pink clothes(man i'm being influenced by bimbos, THEY ARE BEAUTIFUL😭), but i usually wear black shoes and mary jane/demonia shoes and lots of accessories I love any kind of art, but especially drawing, it calms me down a lot.

I'm trying to heal from an eating disorder and sh, but I'm very insecure, I'm silent for a long time but when I start talking NOBODY stops me lol, I think I'm easy to lie even though I'm not proud of it i love animals especially dogs but i don't have one now it seems stupid but i'm addicted to sweets this is kinda funny but still true I think that's enough information

I paired you up with....

♡Asa Emory♡

(TW ED MENTION)

English is not my first language too^^ so don't worry really. We're here for funsies not to be grammatically accurate. Second I wanted to say that even if I know you I'm really proud of you for choosing to recover from the ed, it's not always easy to choose yourself over what your mind is trying to tell you but the fact that you want to get better is a huge step forward! I suffer from ED too so I know how hard It can be, just keep going. I promise it's not going to be always bad♡♡♡ 

Now moving onto our bug  boy here. 

I- IT'S NOT THAT BAD AS YOU THINK I PROMISE. HE'S GONNA BEHAVE WITH YOU I SWEAR. 

First of all he loves, no scratch that, HE ADORES your style. Bimbos and himbos are the best thing ever BTW

But as I was saying, he really enjoys your style. Like we all saw how he decided to dress Abby. He's gonna spoil you rotten with as many dresses and accessories as you like♡ 

Like he's stupid rich, bro here is a whole ass universitary professor so money doesn't really worries him. 

He would actually like it if you let him help you dye your hair cause he finds the whole process entertaining. 

If you feel like changing aesthetic or style he's going to 100% support it and would actually help you pick something you might like. 

Asa would be absolutely over the moon if you draw him something bug themed. He's going to hang every drawing in his office. 

I think Asa's more dominant personality could actually help someone who struggles with taking care of themselves. He would make sure to help you in any possible way but without pushing you or making you uncomfortable. He doesn't mind taking care of someone he loves and he actually feels kinda nice when he knows you need him in more ways than just the plain boyfriend stuff. 

He is glad to listen to whatever you want to tell him. He enjoys stimulating conversations and having someone so passionate to talk with is actually exciting 

He would probably take you out on museum dates and then he takes you to a nice fancy cafe to have some coffee and pastries while you both talk about the paintings ecc

HE LOVES DOGS TOO AND HE HAS TWO BIG DOGGOS WAITING JUST FOR YOU 

He might be a little bit iffy about the lying thing but being Asa the smart man he is, it won't take long until he finds out how to tell when you're lying. That's something he won't like very much but if you're lying about small things or even things that are worrying you, instead of being mad he will try to talk to you about it and ask if he can do anything to fix it. 

This matchup made me think about this song:

[himbos-hotline]

I’ve been thinking about watching Markiplier (most cuz you keep posting about it) but like I don’t really get what it is? Like it’s a YouTube guy right, but the different things he has, are they like one-shot kinda things or like long form tv? What’s his deal? (Idk just tell me about Markiplier)

Okay so his "deal" is that none of his fans know what it is. Mostly he is a gaming youtuber but sometimes we get videos where he is bullying corperations and tormenting del monte until theyre dead to him or him "eating" takis which was....

he also owns many tatical shovels and so many flashlights and one of them harbours the power of the sun. So yknow- the man is a god and could kill any one of us if he had the brains to do it.

He is full of ADD and its great to watch because I dunno its relatable. also theres not that many content creators that I know off that talk about having adhd/add other disabilities which makes me feel less, awkward and subconcious about having it.

trust me friend, none of us "get" what markiplier is. My big sibling and I have this running joke where he is just a forth dimentional being.

also, apart from gaming and random "I BROUGHT A THING!" videos and some other videos like Pain where he talks about the different accidents/illnesses he had and how pain isnt something to be ashamed off because we all go through pain and its okay to feel hurt and emotional and stuff because thats what makes us human- us feeling pain and being able to still exist and be a good person. He is a very big supporter of like queer community and other communities which is another reason why I like him.

There is a story about what Mark really means to us but thats long and sappy and emotional and kinda depressing so we wont get into that right now. But yeah hes just a really cool dude who to me, growing up in a very catholic household showed me than masculinty doesnt equate to being strong or handsome [and he is both, very much so, men my beloved] but its also about having a good heart and making people laugh and not having the fear or guilt of disappointment around our emotions. that crying is okay because the tears will grow the flowers of new emotions. That people matter regardless of who/what they are. Like there are videos where he wears dresses and is just "it spins!" and being like 15/16 growing up and being surrounded by a lot of catholics seeing an AMAB be in "womens clothing" was really special too me and caused me to look into it. There is also a video where he asks someones pronouns and not only sticks to the "he/him, she/her but also xe/xem" which is also very cool!

Watching Mark is a bit like having a dad, a big brother and a seven year old wrapped into one body and sometimes hes all of them but also sometimes he is none of them and were just "..cool!"

also, from a video perspective. there are also the "aventures with markiplier" or the markipler cinimatic universe or simply the micu. It starts with who killed markiplier, a who done it which dives into the story of a cheating wife, a depressed husband, the lover being a former best friend with supernatrual bullshit and ends well....as far as we know its not ended yet.

I can go more into his channel or the MICU or the man himself because ive been watching since I was 12 and have a lot of feelings and thoughts about the stupid little youtube man who does the sceme at pixels on his compooter

he also has a super cute doggo Chica and another good boy called Henry whose technically his girlfriends dog, but chica and henry come as a pair and they are really the reason why people watch [/hj]

[crying-is-your-latest-fashion]

1.) these two disaster gays texting is the best thing ever. I love it.

2.) the small detail of Charlie’s phone screen saying gay panic is great

3.) Nick is so carrying and - HE HAS A Dog!!

4.) I must know everything about the doggo. Must know all I can.

5.) Back on track, Nick is being very honest about everything and I do appreciate how the show highlights that. Honest communication is the most important thing in a relationship and that includes voicing fears and concerns.

6.) the gay music in the background is also a plus.

7.) Is this a flash back? With Charlie playing the drums and Ben. Is this how they met?

8.) Was Charlie outed?? That’s terrible.

8.) No make the straight joke so he can come out. Gays love coming out via joke.

9.) Dang it. Don’t be the straight friend, be the gay or bi boyfriend

10.) Nick staring at the heart is very un straight.

11.) Elle!! My love!!

13.) No, let the teacher help you, make a friend please. They seem nice!!

14.) Another lesbian song!! And a crush montage. I love it!!

15.) Based on Charlie’s joke I’m guessing Tou has a crush on Elle but she’s a lesbian? Makes since. It’s fair.

16.) Issic being a good boy. I get that Tao is trying to help Charlie but he’s being a bit mean.

17.) THE ART TEACHER IS GAY??? Damn I love this show. Queer struggles exist but the shitty ones like being in th closet and homophobia and transphobia aren’t the highlights of the show. It’s queer kids existing and dating like every other high school kid, with just a few more obstacles. It’s amazing to see it.

18.) THIS IS WHAT I MEAN!! Elle can just sit with Darcy and Tara and not have to deal with stupid questions about being trans. She doesn’t have to come out, no one makes a big deal out if it. It simply is what it is and I love that.

19.) Speaking of Darcy and Tara. I love them. They are such a positive representation of female friend ship and it’s amazing.

20.) Is interesting seeing Charlie in comfy clothes. He looks like a regular boy but the gay still shines through.

21.) The hair comments after he was so nervous about how his hair cut looked. It’s such a soft thing but without even trying Nick is waving away Charlie’s anxiety.

22.) Is that how snow works? It can just fall at any point during the day? We don’t have any where I’m from so it’s a legitimate question.

23.) The scene is the snow is so pure and so sweet and I love it. Just the two of them in the freshly fallen world, a place for just them and Nellie, where nothing matters.

24.) Oh no, what does the mom want? Am I going to have to rewrite my earlier points?

25.) The soft, almost broken I do when his Mom indirectly tells him that she likes Charlie, that he’s happier around Charlie.

26.) The immediate switch from his face when he’s thinking of Charlie to when he’s with his friends.

27.) Nope. Refuse to believe that Tara and Nick are dating. They’re are beards. Beards I say, beards!!

28.) Tao is such a good friend. Assembling the gang so that they can help him get over his crush while also giving him something to cry on.

29.) Elle being oblivious to Darcy and Tara dating is gold!!!

30.) No!!! Not the bad fantasy of Nick being straight!!

31.) Loved the subtle coming out.

32.) If these two don’t kiss while on that tiny chair, then why have them sit on a tiny chair?

33.) The fires around Charlie’s hand when Nick goes to touch it.

34.) I like who this episode is more Nick centric. It’s nice.

35.) The hug was so cute.

35.) The music in this show is incredible, every song is purposeful and has a meaning for being where it is that related to the scene or the characters. It takes things to a new level.

36.) Tao is being an ass at this point. Like bro chill, you’re doing too much.

37.) Aaaahhhggg. Everything’s coming together.

38.) This show has done more for lgbt representation in 32 minutes then Supernatural and Love Simon combined.

[chibirisa20]

Some fish are able to change sex for mating purposes, unlike humans who just present themselves whenever.

So imagine the embarrassment and culture shock merman!Red goes through after trying to serenade Ash(in his Ashley attire), thinking he's looking for a mate only to be told that, no humans can just put on dresses just cause(hell the only reason he's even wearing a dress is that the girls found another outfit that they'd thought would look cute on him).

Of course, after getting over his initial shock Red still thinks Ash looks rather pretty in a dress(tho in his opinion Ash could do w/o the wig, he prefers Ash's natural hair). Afterward, Red starts picking up old torn up dresses from nearby shipwrecks for Ash to wear tho Ash tends to be hesitant about it, not because he wouldn't wear a dress willingly if he had/wanted to(if anything he's kind of doesn't mind them all too much nowadays) but just that he's not sure how to feel about wearing clothes from long-deceased people.

[konata-izumi-kinny-writes]

Luigi x GN!Reader sfw and nsfw HCS

Might as well 💚

Warning: some bad grammar and smut hcs bc why not. Me being stupid in an attempt to come up with a simile ;-;

Aight lets get one thing straight... you two are the cutest couple in the whole Mushroom Kingdom

Cuddles and kisses galore, not really in public tho, Weegee is too shy for that

So instead, lots of hand holding and the occasional kiss on the cheek

Luigi is clumsy and you may have to help him sometimes, from catching him when he slips, or helping him out of the dryer because Polterpup accidentally scared him and he fell backwards and got stuck in it. Nobody is safe, but thankfully nobody is seriously injured (yet lmao)

Luigi turns a bit red every time you kiss him.

Kiss him all over his face, he will be redder than a rose bush in the middle of a ladybug swarm (dont judge pls i came up w that on the spot ;-;)

Luigi isn't as on edge around you as he is everyone else, sure he's still a bit nervous around you, but only bc he loves you so much 😭💚.

This boi unfortunately snores, however its not that kind of snore thats so loud it shakes the glass on the windows (thank god).

He will be overjoyed and flustered if you make something for him, whether its food, drawings, plushies, he will love anything you give him ^^

If you insist on going with him to help Professor E. Gadd with another ghost problem... hes stuck to you like glue, not just because hes scared, no no no, Luigi wants to absolutely make sure your safe.

You two hum together while wandering the mansion (like he hums the theme in the game)

If you see a spider in your house... sorry yall but hes just as scared as you are.

Both of yall backed up in a corner screaming and throwing stuff at it until you get it or until Mario walks in🤣

Polterpup absolutely LOVES you. Ghost doggo jumps on you whenever he sees you (such a good boi)

Luigi will put (most of) his fears aside to help you if you're in trouble

Keeps track of your hyperfixations and hobbies

You two travel together sometimes and its the funnest thing ever.

You sit quietly, share ear buds, and hold his hand on the plane, bus, or train

But in the car... KARAOKE THE WHOLE WAY BABYYYYYY

Your guys's relationship is so fun and awkward ^^

AIght yall idk how to put a cut on these thingys so imma just warn you here, SMUT AHEAD IF YOU DONT LIKE THAT STUFF PLS SCROLL and thx for reading this far 🤗

Ooooooh boy

Where do i start

Switch, hes a switch

Yall put Polterpup out in the living room on his own little bed before yall actually do anything

Luigi is SHY AF, so you're gonna have to initiate this, you need to get him going

HES BIG imma just leave it there

Red faced the whole time

A bit shaky at first, nervous boi

He loves you though so he'll put the nerves aside and focus on pleasuring you

Hes pretty vanilla other than a praise kink, Luigi loves you and he wants you to know that

This boi loves your thighs, loves how squishy and warm you are

He goes pretty dang hard but will go slow and gentle if you ask

Checks up on you and makes sure you're ok

Tummy rubs

Lots of neck kisses and marks on your body

Kind of quiet at first but will get louder the longer yall are at it

Loves having you on your back and nuzzling his face in your neck as he makess love to you

After that he helps clean you up and cuddles with you, you two have a bath tomorrow morning.

Aight yall thx for reading :D

[captainlevisteacup]

All Characters, the Nicknames MC has For Them, and the Events That Follow: A Wholly Unnecessary Thread

Warnings: None, unless you count demon boys being butthurt about being called out

Enjoy my stupidity!

Lucifer👿🖤🥀☕🍷

Luci

Pridey Pants

Gordon Ramsey of Life

Mom

Loosen-up Luci

Jesus's emo brother

*cough* Daddy *cough*

The results of these nicknames....they were not pretty. MC calls him Luci? He doesn't LOVE it. Does that small scary smile that MC knows (or should know) not to push.

Pridey pants...ohhh boy. MC says it at dinner....is absolutely terrified when he doesnt do anything. After dinner, follows MC into the hallway to dole out *ahem* punishment

Beel is the only one to understand the Gordon Ramsey one. Starts booming laughter

Mom. Oho. This is the second worst. Happened when MC asked Luci to pass them a steak knife. Ended up with the knife being thrown into the table, inches from MC's hand.

Ah. The worst one. Jesus's emo brother. He doesnt even know where to begin. The brothers AND Diavolo have to SPRINT away to keep from cackling like crazed lunatics. Simeon is the only one who openly laughs. Kitchen duty for 2 months. Absolutely worth it. Would do it again without hesitation.

Mammon💛💵💰💳

Mammory Gland

Finding Nemo Seagull (Mine! Mine!)

Crow

Tan Elsa

Greedo

General Greedous

"Ehhhhh? What's a mammary gland?"

*muffled Satan laughter*

Mc has to explain the crow one, because apparently it isnt common knowledge that crows love shiny things?

Tan Elsa. Levi was crying when this one slipped out of MC's mouth. All Mammon could do was be offended. After much, MUCH coaxing, reluctantly agreed to dance to "Let it Go" in a dress.

Levi💜🐍🎮🕹

Has a thing for degradation, so you can really only insult him with anime stuff

Levi Heichou (if you get this, we can be friends)

Leviathan the lonely

Snake man

Mermaid Boy

Snekky snek

Levia-hand

He could ignore all of them.....except for

LEVIA-HAND

I mean come on!

"MC did you really have to go there? That was really-"

"Below the belt?"

"UGH MCCCCC"

*distant suggestive Asmo noises*

Satan💚💢📚

Angry bean

Grumpy kitty

Nerd

Angry librarian

Blond, angsty James Charles

Fashion disaster

There isn't a single one of these that DOESNT make Satan want to break something.

Who is James Charles? Fashion disaster?! "I happen to dress very nicely, thank you very much"

"How am I a librarian? I just read, it's very different, honestly MC"

Refuses to even acknowledge "grumpy kitty"

Asmodeus😘💋❤💅

Asmo-dick-us

Ass-mo

Momo

Polly Pocket

The kinky one

*jokingly* slutttttt

He, surprisingly, doesn't mind any of them. He thinks it's really cute that MC has nicknames for him. He always encourages you to call him them more often, and even makes a bunch of them for MC. His favorite one is Momo, because:

"Its just so cuuuuuuute!"

Beel🥺🍔💪🏻

Sexy Vacuum man

The last Weasley

Snack Buddy

Hungry Bean

Un-beel-eavable

These all make the boy SO HAPPY

MC cares enough to make nicknames for him?

*happy Beel noises*

Wait. MC thinks he's sexy?😳

What's a Weasley?

He has a snack buddy?☺☺☺

Belphie🙁💭💤🛏

Sloth man

Sleepyhead

That bastard with a choking kink

Killer grip

The emo twin

Black Sheep

"I woke up like this" master

He wants to be mad. He really does. But there's a problem: he can't argue with ANY of them. Kinda makes him smile just a LITTLE

Is glad MC has forgiven him enough to actually JOKE about the choking incident.

Spends a lot of time trying to get someone to explain what "emo" means. Levi knows what it means, and refuses to tell him because he thinks its funnily accurate

Dia👑💮🔥

Double D Dia

Big Tiddy Divvy

King of the Boobs

Díablo

Milk man

Firehead

The rich, gay uncle

There isnt a single minute he doesn't find these hysterical. He thinks it's a charming human world custom, to give someone a nickname. He also thinks it shows how comfortable with him MC is.

His favorite is easily DD Dia. Mc noticed his body? *smirk* interesting

Why are so many of them boob related? MC does realize he is a male, right?

The rich, gay uncle. Diavolo has no words. Absolutely shook.

Lucifer overheard some of these...was appalled MC was harassing the PRINCE with their ridiculous nicknames.

He was about to go off on a terrified MC, when Diavolo stepped in laughing and told Lucifer....

"Calm down, Mom."

Mc nearly choked on their own suppressed laughter

Barbatos had to quickly usher them away so MC could openly laugh and therefore breathe

Barbatos 🧐👀🐀🕓

Barbie

Simply one hell of a butler

Sebas-chan

Time warp man

Chuck E Cheese

The cake maker

Understands every single reference, is actually surprisingly cool with it, as long as MC doesn't embarrass him with it.

Diavolo catches wind of what MC is calling Barbaties, eventually starts adopting the nicknames

The only one Barbatos doesn't like is "Chuck E Cheese", because he hates rats so so much. How dare they compare him to one of those disgusting creatures?

Simeon🌙🤍🌹🌈

Boomer

Dad joke central

Beautiful man

Sinful shoulders

Angel Dad

Sin-ammon Roll

Simeon can't decide between being flattered or appalled. He's not THAT old. Nor is he a father! Well, maybe more of a father figure in regards to Luke, but still! He doesn't tell THAT many dad jokes.. right?

Blushes intensely at Beautiful man and Sinammon roll. Wonders if MC really means that or is just teasing him.

Eventually he makes the stupid decision to ask Asmo....wrong move. Asmo ends up laying out all of Simeon's desires towards MC, the week following he can't even look MC in the face. MC has no clue what happened and starts to think it was their fault.

They confront Simeon about it after a while, and Simeon full on breaks and confesses to MC

Asmo takes full credit for this happening

Solomon😑🖤💫🧙🏻‍♂️

Shady Lady

The sus one

Kinky dude

Draco malfoy

Doesn't mind MC having insulting nicknames for him....he has them too. Starts swapping them with MC to see who can make the other laugh harder.

Sometimes, the brothers will sit in and listen while they exchange them, and they'll keep score and vote on who wins

Eventually, Diavolo and Simeon get involved

Barbatos caters these events

Luke😇👶🏼🌸🧁

Baby angel

Son

Woof

Puppy

Little doggo

The poor boy has no idea which one he hates more. Gets so flustered whenever MC calls him one of these that his whole face turns red

Simeon tells him its adorable every time without fail

This makes Luke even worse. All MC has to do is call Luke one of the names and its fair game for Luke hunting

The only one he actually...kind of...likes is Son. He likes the idea of MC as a parent figure.

Which leads him to realize: what if MC and Simeon got together! Then MC WOULD be his parent

Gets Solomon and Barbatos to help bring MC and Simeon together

They end up bombarding the two with an obnoxious Valentine's day-esque cake

Did it work?

[georgiapeach30513]

Let’s Walk the Giant

🖤🖤🖤🖤

Summary:  WAFFLE

Pairings:  Ransom X Kitten, Foxley

Rating:  cotton ball

Warnings:  floofy animals, 18+ ONLY

Word Count:  650

Desperate Lives AU Masterlist

Papa & Mimi’s Grandbabies Masterlist

This was completely @marveloustaylortot​ idea, down to the cute doggo, and even hims name.  It’s about time the rest of the Drysdale’s get pets!

Ransom comes to a complete stop as he looks at the open dishwasher.  Dramatically he looks around the kitchen.  And the thing squats down, butt up in the air.  “Nope.  No.  Kitten!  Kitten there is a cotton ball in the dishwasher.  Kitten!  Where is my wife?  KITTEN!”

“Papapapapapapapapa,” Foxley waddles in and stares up at Ransom.  “Waffle.”

“Foxy, I’ll make you some waffles when the white cloud dissipates.  Kitten!”

“Waffle!” Foxley shouts stomping her foot.  “My Waffle,” she growls up at Ransom, which only confuses him more.

“Let me figure out the mystery of the puff ball first.”

“Papa,” Foxley grunts at him.

“Foxley.”

“Waffle.”

“I know.”

“Ransom,” both Ransom and Foxley turn to look at his wife, and his whole hand gestures to the white fluff ball.  

“Waffle.”

“Your granddaughter wants waffles, and there’s a thing in the dishwasher.”

“She doesn’t want waffles,” feigning more agitation than he feels he throws up his hands, while she squats.  “Waffle, come here boy.”

“Waffle, Papa.”

“Waffle?  She named the dog Waffle?”

“Yep.  My Waffle,” sitting completely in the floor, Waffle licks all over her face.  “Waffle.”

“First, the giant bunny, because Poppy didn’t want to be without something fluffy when she was here,” she rolls her eyes at him, and gives the fluffy dog some pets.  “Now, cotton candy.”

“You love Biscoff.”

“I have to take care of him.”

“Ran,” she rolls her eyes, walking over to close the dishwasher.  “You ordered Biscoff a special harness.”

“He needs to go for walks.”

“How much did that harness cost?” 

“He has a lot of fluff, and the other one made him uncomfortable.  He’s a big boy,” Kitten looks down at Foxley before back at her husband.  “What I’m saying is,” he stops when Buttercup walks in and sits down beside Ransom.

“Why is Story’s dog here?”

“She was being neglected, because of the babies, so I went and got her.”

“Do you even hear yourself?  You complain more about the animals than anyone else, but you buy Biscoff a custom two hundred dollar harness, you kidnap Buttercup, and every time Noodle is here, she sits in your lap.  Now, you have another fluffy thing to complain about, but secretly you love it completely.”

“Well,” he sputters as she walks away.  “Biscoff was uncomfortable.  Noodle loves me, Buttercup is my princess, and,” he looks down at the marshmallow that follows him, “Shoo.”

“Waffle.”

“I know, the cloud paint is Waffle.  Kitten, why are you walking away from me.”

"Your son is also bringing Squish’s dog by.”

“No!”

“Waffle friend!”

She stops, to glare at Ransom.  “Oh, you just wait.  Harry went against Blade, and got the pet Fable really wanted.  She looks like a teddy bear.”

“Tell him to take it back.  Next we’re going to have something stupid like a llama in our yard or something,” Kitten gives him the biggest smirk, but he shakes his head no.  “No!  No more animals.”

“You sound like Aster.  How many kids does she have now?”

“Kitten, don’t do it.”

“Ooh, which child would want a guinea pig or a parrot?  How majestic you would look with a parrot on your shoulder.  Put you in a puffy shirt and you can be captain of my ship,” she gives him a wink before walking off, followed by Foxley and Waffle.

“Did you hear that?” he asks looking down at Buttercup.  “Your mom has two babies that aren’t a year apart, so I do you a favor.  And that woman, she called me captain, but also is mocking me at the same time.  She’s ridic...”

“You’re ridiculous!” Kitten screams from off.

“I was saying it first!  Buttercup, you wanna take Biscoff for a walk?” Snorting, Buttercup lays down on the floor.  “You’ve got to get along with the giant rabbit.  Poppy said she wants me and her to take all the bunnies for a walk.  Go get your leash.  I’ll give you a strawberry when we get back,” Buttercup perks up, her tongue hanging out her mouth as she looks at him.  “Who’s a good girl?  Go get your leash, lets walk the giant.”

Masterlist

[gothamsdogtrainer]

So, I’m a professional dog trainer. I used to train K9 and military dogs, but started to train service dogs instead. I run several classes on training dogs for pretty much everything. But, I have my own dog Harley (a pittie lab mix) who I’ve trained to come to me whenever I say his name. I’ve also trained him to walk beside me without a leash and leave other dogs alone. He’s a very good boy and I love him! Anyways, I’m talking him out on a midnight walk which is already ten levels of stupid, but I come across the new Tiny Robin and Harley Quinn(I’ll call her Quinn and my pupper Harley to keep it simple) teaming up against this dude who is always harassing girls on their way home. I’m just chilling and slowed down to give them time to do their thing, and it looks like everything is done for when he pulls a knife out of nowhere, and aims for Quinn. Robin screams “Harley!” and my worst fear in that moment came to be when MY DOG starts BARRELING down the street and bites this guys arm. I tear off after my fuzzy son just in time to stop him from hurting my boy. I vaguely remember saying something like “ Keep your nasty ass hands off my dog!” as I clocked him into next week. And, oh, did I mention I’m ex military? So I pack a punch. I let Red Robin, who showed up out of nowhere, take care of dealing with him while I made sure Harley was okay. Next thing I new, Quinn AND Small Robin are both smothering my doggo in kisses and praises. Quinn tells me she likes his name. The next morning I receive a knock on my door and a very big box of dog treats and toys is outside my doorstep with a very nice handwritten letter signed from “Harley, Bud, and Lou” with two huge paw prints in red ink. Or, what I’m hoping is red ink. Didn’t realize Quinn was a fellow dog mama! 

Update: Three weeks after this happened I’m outside teaching a group some basic dog training when Damian Wayne and Tim Drake show up? Damian asks me if I still teach K9 search and rescue and defensive techniques and reveals his gorgeous german shepherd. So I guess I have new clients?

#onlyingotham #gothamitestories #maybeharleyisn’tthatbad #thedogsnameisace #ourdogsgetalongverywell

[pillow-anime-talk]

Yooo thank you again for my Eiji request ❤❤❤ . It was healing to my soul lmaoo. Can I request again if it's okay? For my dear Bokuto with prompt 41 please 💞

# tags: scenario; current relationship; light romance; fluff; reader as dog person; big bby bokuto; sfw

includes: gender neutral reader ft. koutarou bokuto {hq!!}

author’s note: my pleasure! and of course, it’s totally okay! i love bokuto, my big baby.

41. “But I want a kiss too!”

“... Hey, hey. Who’s a good boy?” Bokuto immediately turned his head towards your voice and was about to say something, but hearing your next sentence closed his mouth again, making him a big and pouty baby. “Of course you’re a good boy, you lovely doggo.” Your joyful voice echoed against the living room walls again, and the young man frowned.

“Bab...” The volleyball player started, but your joyful squeak cut him off again.

“You’re so cute, oh my God...! I can’t, I can’t.” Your eyes sparkled and your cheeks were flushed cutely, so Bokuto wanted to grab you by them, but... “Shake, please.” You put your hand forward and the little dog passed you his paw, wagging his tail happily; that caused you another sweet grunt and praise that you said towards him.

Of course, you and Akaashi’s pet liked each other from the very first moment. Anyway, how could you not do that? You’ve literally begged your boyfriend’s friend to give you and Koutarou a dog for the weekend, when he himself will be away in connection with his work. You were overjoyed when Keiji agreed and he also seemed to be like that when he saw a huge smile appear on your face and your sweet voice greets the brown miniature spitz.

You had a good hand with animals; as a kind person you have always attracted different creatures to you. From the neighbour’s cats, to squirrels in the park and ducks in the pond. So Akaashi’s dog was no exception. He was obedient, polite and liked to play, so from the early morning you spent time by his side stroking him, carrying him in your arms, watching him eat his dinner or taking him for a walk to the nearest park.

Bokuto, on the other hand, watched it all from behind the couch or the table. Of course, he was also extremely happy that you had such a good time, because you didn’t have your own pet at home, but on the other hand... You didn’t pay much attention to him that day, devoting all your free time to the puppy... He felt a little lonely? Jealous? Something like that, it was stupid, but... It’s Bokuto, he liked being the center of attention, especially yours.

“Ahhh, who’s a good boy? Who? Who? Yesss, you!” You asked again and the dog barked, causing you to giggle again. Shortly after that, you picked up the pet and gave it a quick kiss right on the top of its small head.

“... Ehh, Y/N~!” Suddenly you heard a loud groan from your boyfriend, so you raised your head and glanced at his figure lying on the big, black couch. “I know Akaashi’s puppy is very cute, but I want a kiss too! You haven’t been paying attention to me since this morning, baby! I’m so so so sad! Come to me!”

You raised your right eyebrow slightly, then laughed sweetly as you walked on your knees towards the sofa. After a while you placed a sweet peck on the lips of the twenty-four-year-old, who shortly after grabbed your waist and lifted you. You ended up cuddling together on the couch, and the dog fell asleep between you two. 

It was a really charming sight.

[witcherslittledove]

Home is Where the Heart Is

A Joey/Henry lockdown fic - AO3

Rated: T

Words: 7k ish

CW: RPF, covid, far too much pining?

_______

“I’m sorry, Joey,” Madeleine sighed again, pressing her head into the crook of Joey’s neck, her hair tickling his cheek.

It was pulled back into a messy bun, flyaway strands surrounding her face in a halo, and as the sun shone from behind her, she looked like some kind of angel. Joey wondered, not for the first time, how he’d even been so lucky to have Madeleine as a friend. She truly was a wonder, his favourite person and light of his life. Everyone should have a friend like Madeleine Hyland.

He laughed and pressed a kiss to her temple as he pulled back from her embrace. “Nah, it’s alright, Madeleine. Your parents need you, much more important than little old me.”

“Oh fuck that, you bastard, stop fishing for compliments,” she laughed, swatting him on the arm.

“Aww,” he pouted, “Oi!”

She’d hit his arm again, barely a tap but he pretended it hurt, rubbing his arm and pouting even harder at his friend.

“Come off it, Joey. You’re staying with Henry for the rest of lockdown, that’s hardly a trial,” she teased, poking him in the chest.

Ah yes.

Henry.

The bane of Joey’s existence, mostly because of the fucking ginormous crush he had on his co-star. He hadn’t known Henry had been signed on for Geralt until his audition, really he hadn’t known much at all, just that he’d be auditioning for a bard and that he should probably take his lute to the audition. A spur of the moment decision that had turned his life upside down. He’d gone from a nobody to... well, not exactly famous but people had started to recognise him, much to his despair.

And then there was Henry.

He’d been admiring Henry from a distance for a few years now, watching him in the Tudors had sort of been Joey’s bisexual awakening, and then he’d suddenly been thrust into the most bizarre experience of having to work fairly closely with the man.

Joey would never forget the feeling of Henry throwing him over his shoulder as if he wasn’t almost the same size as Henry.

Fuck, that had been hot.

And now, Joey had to cohabit with said crush for an indeterminate amount of time, preferably without making a fool of himself.

He was doomed.

Of course, he could have said no when Henry had offered his place when Joey was grumbling about being alone during lockdown after Madeleine's parents got sick, but no… Henry had stared at him with such shining hope in his eyes that Joey never stood a chance.

Joey just needed to keep reminding himself that Henry was straight. He was practically the poster boy for heteronormative; classically gorgeous, action star, gymrat, lover of sports and building fucking computers.

Okay, maybe Joey was generalising a tad, but it was a form of self-defence.

Christ, the mere thought that Henry could be interested in men… interested in him.

It was too much.

So here he was, saying goodbye to his best friend whilst waiting for his biggest crush to pick him up. Madeleine bundled into her car with the last of her bags, and Joey was left waiting on the pavement. In all honesty, he would have preferred to drive to Henry’s place himself or at least get the tube, something where he felt like he was actively doing something. The waiting was killing him, making his thoughts run out of control. Maybe he shouldn’t have packed his guitar. He could have at least been tuning it, or plucking out some meaningless melody, anything to keep his hands busy and his mind distracted.

When the black car pulled up, Joey let out a sigh of relief before realising that it was very much frying pan, fire. Luckily, before he could really start to panic, the back door opened and Joey was almost bowled off his feet by a large bundle of fur that Henry claimed was a dog and not, in fact, a bear.

“Kal!” Joey greeted warmly, burying his fingers into Kal’s neverending fur, and letting the dog lick all over his face.

“He’s missed you,” Henry called in lieu of a greeting.

He was wearing a grey henley that looked like it was two sizes too small and his dark blue jeans seemed to strain against his quads. Henry’s arms were crossed in front of his chest and he looked down at Joey with a blinding Hollywood smile that made Joey’s heart flutter. Dark curls seemed to have finally recovered from the weeks stuck under Geralt’s wig and they fell in front of his so very blue eyes.

He was bloody gorgeous, and it wasn’t fucking fair.

So Joey did the only logical thing, and started to coo at Kal instead. “I’ve missed him too,” he trilled happily into the dog’s fur, scratching Kal behind his ears. “Such a good boy! The bestest, cutest doggo.”

“He’s not the only one who’s missed you, you know,” Henry groused, although when Joey looked up, he was still smiling so Joey didn’t feel too bad for paying far more attention to Kal than the gorgeous specimen of a man that is Henry Cavill.

“Aww, you sap,” he chuckled. “Well, I still haven’t forgiven you for those cruel and terrible words you cursed me with the last time we met.”

It wasn’t the last time they’d met. They’d had a few scenes after the argument in episode six. Scheduling had meant that it wasn’t filmed entirely in order, and then there had been reshoots and post-production parties, premieres and the table reads for season two, but it was a sort of in-joke. Joey liked to tease Henry about the argument, they’d both lurked enough online to know that ‘the mountain’ was a big fucking deal to the fans of their characters.

Henry rolled his eyes and opened his arms out for a hug which Joey eagerly returned, inhaling the soft musky cologne that Henry wore and enjoying the strongs arms that wrapped around him. He loved hugs, but most of Joey’s male friends would do that god awful hug and pat thing, then pull away too soon. Henry had never been like that and it was delightful, even if it really didn’t help the not so little crush that Joey had on the man.

It was cliche but it really did feel like coming home.

Fuck.

He was utterly screwed… and not even in the fun way.

The drive to Henry’s place was quiet, Joey spent most of the time watching the streets of London roll past as they weaved through bendy roads that webbed across the city. The traffic was weirdly non-existent, a side effect of a global pandemic, and he couldn’t help but be reminded of the ghost towns from films and books.

It was truly haunting, spooky in just the right way. Horror and the Wild had very much had woodland magic vibes, but driving through the dead streets of London, Joey wondered what happened to the fae when a city sprung up near their home. Did they adapt like the wildlife did? Urban spirits that lurked in the shadows, in the alleys, behind the bins and cobbled streets at the back of theatres.

Most theatres were supposed to be haunted, Joey had always wondered just who the spirits were that glided through the aisles when the shows went dark.

Henry didn’t feel the need to fill the silence which Joey was grateful for. On set, with Jaskier on his fingertips, Joey was happy to joke about and laugh and banter, but he was nervous about the move to Henry’s and the silence gave him time to get lost in his own imagination, a reality that wasn’t quite the one they knew.

He was almost disappointed when the car pulled to a stop in front of a rather grand house. It was part of a terrace but that was unsurprising, most places in London were, but it was much nicer than the shitty little flat that Joey shared with Madeleine.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

They were poles apart. Even being friends was unrealistic. How the hell was Joey supposed to even pretend they were in the same league? It was fine. Everything was going to be fine. Joey just had to be a perfect house guest, no clumsy mistakes, no setting fire to any ovens, and no slipping in the shower and messing up his ankle.

He’d just have to spend all his time with Kal lest Henry find out just how much of a walking disaster he could be.

Henry had only offered because he was a caregiver, selfless and kind in everything he did. He would have done the same to anyone else if they’d mentioned spending lockdown alone. Joey was just the lucky one.

Or unlucky.

He hadn’t quite decided yet.

Yes, he would just have to spend his days with Kal and his guitar, stay out of Henry’s way and then everything would be fine.

Right?

___

Joey’s plan went according to plan for almost an entire week. He mostly kept to his room and occasionally the living room. Henry wanted to show Joey some films he liked and it would have been rude to say no, so Joey curled up with Kal on the floor to keep some space between them. That way he wouldn’t be tempted to snuggle up against Henry’s chest the same way he did with Madeleine, only it wouldn’t be the same because Madeleine was his best friend and Henry was… well… Henry.

It was such a mess.

And he was probably being an arse.

They’d gotten along so well on set in between takes, but now, without Jaskier there as a crutch, Joey’s anxiety was getting the better of him, and all because of a stupid crush. This would all be a lot easier if Joey were straight; no awkward crushes, no pining for a man he couldn’t have, no… whatever this was?

He could flirt and tease and banter just like he would with any of his friends because it was harmless.

If only.

No.

He had to do better. The reason Henry had invited him to stay was so neither of them would be alone, and despite all his cuddles with Kal, Joey was really starting to feel touch starved. He’d never gone so long without human touch.

The problem was that Henry was just so fucking sweet. He was so bloody understanding that it made Joey just yearn even harder. There was never any pressure to hang out, just gentle suggestions, and the most amazing home-cooked meals that Henry said could be heated up another time if Joey wasn’t hungry. The wine Henry picked out to go with the meal was heavenly, and fuck, the man could cook.

He felt like he was being seduced; wooed with the most gorgeous culinary delights that were truly to die for.

What was a poor bisexual to do?

So every evening Joey would sit across from Henry at the table, trying to joke and laugh just as they had before, but even to his own ears it felt flat. Madeleine’s voice in his head reminded him that that was probably his anxiety speaking but, of course, he ignored it. They ate their food and then Joey would either retreat to his room with his beloved guitar or Henry would suggest a film.

Until Henry decided enough was enough.

Joey was lured from his room with the sweet delicious smell of pizza, and when he came down the stairs he found Henry already on the couch, two boxes of pizza and a couple of beers already opened and ready to go.

There was no sitting on the floor, not with pizza and a Kal. Joey wouldn’t get to taste the greasy wonders of his takeaway if he sat on the floor, and the pizza box was already being guarded by Henry on the couch.

He had to break his rule.

Fuck.

“Kitchen table not good enough?” he teased with a quirk of his lips.

Henry scoffed. “Who eats pizza at the table?”

It was a fair point and sighed, resigning himself to an evening pressed up against his friend when his cuddle instincts got too much. Maybe it wouldn’t be a bad thing, maybe it would help get him out of his head and into the moment… maybe he should just let Jaskier out of the box and pretend that all was fine?

No.

He could do this. Just… be himself?

“Before I open this box, there is one very important question I have to ask,” he said far too seriously, barely able to hide a smile as he scooped the pizza box into his lap and sat down next to Henry, keeping a safe distance between them.

“There’s no pineapple.”

“Oh thank fuck for that,” Joey laughed and opened the box. It was a standard pepperoni pizza, not his go to, but it was a safe option and one that was always yummy regardless of the restaurant. “Garlic dip?” he asked with a cock of his head.

“Damn, I hoped you wouldn’t like it,” Henry grumbled and pulled a small green topped tub from inside his own box.

“You!” Joey said in mock outrage, “keeping the beloved dip from me. It’s like the mountain all over again.”

“It’s not like the mountain,” Henry grumbled. “I didn’t make the script, you can’t keep blaming me for that.”

Joey’s heart sank as he wondered if he’d taken the joke too far, but when he met Henry’s gaze he saw the man was smiling despite his grousing. “I can,” he insisted.

“Hmm,” Henry replied in his most Geralt-y voice.

And with an internal sigh of relief, everything seemed to be okay. Yes, Joey was pulling some of his energy from his beloved character, but so was Henry, and it seemed to smooth out the edges of his anxiety. The beer helped and everything seemed a lot more relaxed with the takeaway pizza and the film already starting to play on the TV.

“I’m sorry,” Henry whispered after the pizza was finished and the credits had started to roll.

Joey’s head was resting on his friend’s shoulder but he’d managed to keep himself from koala hugging… so far. The vulnerability caught his attention though, and he sat up wearily to peer at Henry.

“For what?”

“I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable by inviting you here.”

Joey wanted to swear, to stomp around the room and tear the place upside down. He’d fucked up. He knew he’d fucked up, his damn anxiety keeping him from being the person he wanted to be, the person he knew he could be if his head just shut up! He didn’t do any of that though. Instead, he slumped back down to lean against Henry and took a deep breath.

“You didn’t make me uncomfortable.”

“I didn’t?”

“No. I’m just- it’s hard for me, being somewhere new,” not a lie, not entirely the truth, “and I didn’t want to encroach on your space. This is your home, and I- umm- I didn’t want to get in the way.”

Henry laughed, running a hand through his hair, pushing the curls back off his face, and Joey was entranced for a moment, wanting to reach out and feel the soft hair between his fingers for himself. It was a miracle that he managed to keep his hands in his own lap.

“Joey, this is our home, for now at least,” Henry said with such conviction and warmth that Joey made a sort of strangled noise in the back of his throat.

“Our home?”

“We have no idea how long this nightmare is going to last. It could be months, Joey. I want you to feel like you can relax here,” Henry insisted, wrapping his arm around Joey’s shoulder and pulling him into a sideways hug.

“Right- yeah, no, I know,” Joey mumbled, trying and failing not to blush.

Now that Henry wasn’t really having to watch what he ate and stay dehydrated for dear old Geralt, he was big.

And Joey was weak.

It was like all his wet dreams were becoming a reality, one by one.

He was just monkey-braining over the fact that Henry was one big, large, strong man that wanted to take care of him. It was pathetic. Joey wasn’t exactly small himself, and he could, should the role require it, hold up pretty well in a sword fight with Henry and not look entirely ridiculous.

“And I know Kal is very cute,” Henry teased, nodding to the dog who was sprawled on the carpet in front of them, “but if you ever need a hug, he’s not your only option.”

Joey definitely didn’t squeak this time. Instead, he finally let himself snuggle up to Henry the way he’d been wanting to all evening, every evening since he’d arrived. “Like this?” he teased.

Henry chuckled, and just squeezed his arms tighter around Joey, “Exactly.”

“I’m sorry,” Joey mumbled. “I was being an arse.”

“No, it’s not your fault.”

Joey scoffed.

“I should have been clearer on day one,” Henry sighed, “although seeing as you live here now, maybe you should cook?”

Joey laughed nervously, burying his face into Henry’s jumper. “Neither of us want that,” he muttered. “Trust me.”

“I’ll help?” Henry suggested, which of course brought forth a dozen images of cooking together, dancing in the kitchen to whatever songs fell past Joey’s lips, lazy early morning kisses as they waited for the coffee.

He swallowed, blinking away the fantasies. “How about you cook, and I’ll help?”

“Lazy,” Henry said with a chuckle but just pulled Joey closer.

“Only trying to keep you safe, darling.”

Darling.

Fuck.

“I mean, Henry, sorry, slip of the tongue. I mean- fuck. I call Madeleine darling all the time?”

“Joey, it's okay,” Henry reassured him.

“Okay.”

“Okay.”

With a sigh, Joey untangled himself from Henry’s arms and gathered up the pizza boxes and empty beer cans. Booping Kal on the nose as he went past, he busied himself with clearing up. It wasn’t much and didn’t take long, so sooner than he would have liked he poked his head back around the door.

Henry was sitting on the floor, rough-housing Kal, chuckling as the dog kept licking at his face. The sight made Joey smile softly, and he almost didn’t want to leave, but he was getting tired and he really didn’t want to slip up again. He couldn’t blame every mistake on Madeleine. It wouldn’t be fair to her.

“I’m going to bed,” he mumbled, scratching the back of his hair. “See you tomorrow, Henry.”

_______

After that, things started to get easier. Joey would flop down onto the sofa next to Henry in the evenings regardless of what they were doing. Sometimes he’d lie with his head in Henry’s lap whilst they both read a book, other times he’d pluck at his guitar and laugh over stupid limericks that he could make up about his co-star. True to his word, Henry made Joey start helping with mealtimes, although he soon regretted that decision but refused to back down. The food still tasted good but the presentation was lacking. They spent an afternoon trying to bake bread together… Joey’s did not turn out so well and Henry’s attempt was thankfully less than perfect but still edible. The little flaws made Joey feel a little less inferior, and made Henry seem all the more human.

Kal still got a lot of Joey’s attention. How could he not? He was just so fluffy and adorable, plus Joey loved the little pout that Henry did whenever Kal got more hugs than he did. Joey could pretend that his friend was jealous, and that just helped him sleep a little easier at night.

Cuddling on the couch had become their usual routine, and it settled something deep inside of Joey that had been becoming restless. Mornings were spent watching Henry workout. Joey joined in occasionally but usually he would just cheer Henry on from the sidelines sipping his cup of tea. It was a sight to behold, and Joey thanked the lord that the gyms were currently closed otherwise he would never have been allowed to enjoy the view.

Henry’s arse was truly spectacular.

Despite his morning workouts, Henry had definitely gained a rather lovely layer of fat over his previously tightly toned muscles. He looked stronger. He looked cuddlier. Joey’s crush was only getting worse by the day, wanting to run his hands over the broad muscles of Henry’s back, thighs, arms… wherever he was allowed, but he just settled for the cuddling each day.

Joey tried not to think about the fat building over his own stomach and filling out his cheeks, barely noticeable unless you’d had a lifetime of his mother breathing down his neck about his weight. He was cuddlier too, that’s what he told himself whenever the familiar buzz of anxiety started to build up.

And anyway, Henry didn’t seem to mind.

Kal certainly didn’t. The beast of a dog had started to share the sofa with them in the evenings, squishing between them for maximum cuddle potential until eventually he got bored and retreated back to the floor.

It was really starting to feel like home. There were signs of Joey around the house, sheet music left on the TV cabinet, a set of spare lute strings in the kitchen, the bastard instrument tucked away in the corner of the living room until Joey could bring himself to pick it up. Two sets of keys now hung up by the front door so they could both take turns walking Kal without having to worry about getting locked out if the other was busy. A fluffy worn blanket was now strewn over the big armchair where Joey liked to sit during the day. Even the fridge now stocked Joey’s favourite rosé wine.

All in all, Joey wasn’t hating lockdown. It was frustrating but he enjoyed being inside anyway, and well, the company was pretty great.

The two of them were curled up on the sofa watching the Great British Bake Off on netflix, gin and tonics flowing a little too freely, and Joey felt like he was on top of the world. He had the best cuddler in all of England, nay, the world, a big fluffy puppy to boot and some bloody brilliant booze in hand.

The best thing was that Henry’s hoody had shifted up at some point during the evening, and Joey couldn’t take his eyes off the soft but defined muscles that were often hidden under Henry’s clothes. The dark hair that dipped beneath the exposed band of Henry’s boxers was tantalizing, and Joey longed to reach out and touch…

Only he was drunk enough that his inside thoughts had his hand moving before he could realise, landing on Henry’s stomach.

He froze and stared up at his friend with wide eyes.

“Oops,” he slurred.

“That’s my stomach,” Henry pointed out.

And still Joey didn’t remove his hand, relishing the bare skin beneath his fingertips, but he knew he needed an excuse, so he did the only logical thing and launched his attack. Henry was stronger than him, but Joey had the element of surprise as he tickled his friend, fingers dancing across the exposed skin as Henry desperately tried to shove Joey away. They were both laughing, too busy pushing and pulling at each other, that neither of them quite registered that at some point in the tussle, Joey had straddled Henry’s waist in an attempt to keep him pinned down.

Until suddenly their lips were barely a breath apart.

Oh.

“Hi,” Joey mumbled, smiling coyly down at Henry, the longer strands of his fringe falling into his eyes.

“Hi.”

It wouldn’t take much to lean down and kiss him, maybe Henry would even reach up first. There was no denying the sudden pull between them, and god, Joey wanted it. He’d wanted it for so long now.

So close.

The warmth of Henry’s breath brushing against his lips.

Eyes closed.

Hearts racing.

A soft whisper of a moan.

And then a bark rang out in the room, startling Joey and shattering the moment. He cursed as he fell to the floor, the world spinning from the gin and giddy burst of adrenaline. Kal jumped up into Henry’s lap, barking and whining excitedly at his owner, checking that he was okay following Joey’s tyrannical tickle attack.

Joey felt like an ice bucket had been dumped over his head, feeling far too sober, far too fast.

He’d almost kissed Henry.

He’d almost kissed Henry.

Fuck!

“Right,” he slurred as he pushed his hands back through his hair- too long, needed a haircut. “Bedtime, sleep. Yup.”

“Joey?”

“See you in the morning?” he mumbled, although glancing at the clock, he wondered if that was a little optimistic. “Tomorrow,” he amended.

“Tomorrow,” Henry agreed, looking a little disappointed.

Joey refused to think about it. He wouldn’t start to hope. It would hurt too much if this all went wrong.

______

They didn’t talk about it.

Or rather, Joey, didn’t talk about it.

Henry tried to bring it up the next morning but Joey just laughed it off before his heart could get torn to pieces. He didn’t need confirmation that his crush was a no go. He already knew, but he really didn’t need to hear the words. Not to mention his hangover was an utter bitch and all he wanted to do was crawl back into bed and feel sorry for himself, which is exactly what he did.

After a few days, or was it weeks, months, years? Time seemed to stop existing, all Joey knew was his clothes seemed to be tighter than before and he was in desperate need of a haircut, but after a lockdown-eque period of time, all was forgotten. They fell back into their usual routine, and Joey’s crush continued to simmer just below the surface, unnoticed by Henry.

He’d started to facetime Madeleine most evenings just before bed now that the novelty of living with a bloody filmstar had worn off. He missed her terribly and she seemed to be going crazy at her parent’s house. There was a twinge of guilt stabbing in his chest when he realised he’d all but forgotten about her the first few weeks of lockdown, but it was nice to catch up with her again.

Henry was brilliant, but he was no Madeleine Hyland. He wasn’t Joey’s best friend.

And sometimes Joey just needed to vent about Henry’s stranger habits. Like seriously, why wass there that weird sponsored water just stationed around the house? And what was with the weirdly staged selfies on instagram. It made Joey feel a whole lot better about his own lack of media presence. He’d rather be a mystery online than this boomer energy than Henry had going on.

Venting to Madeleine helped too, he got less frustrated about the shit hole that was life during a pandemic. A little less angry, a little less depressed, and a little less pathetic with his pining over Henry, although Madeleine would probably disagree.

She was probably right.

The sudden cold turn in the weather hadn’t helped. It wasn’t too bad but Joey had mostly brought summer clothes with him because he honestly hadn’t thought he’d be staying more than a couple of weeks. Thankfully he’d thrown in a couple of onesies for comfort reasons so he spent most his days dressed like a tiger and hoping that Henry would find it endearing. The best part was his onesies were a bit looser and fit him more comfortably than his normal clothes. A lockdown diet was brilliant, but not exactly what he’d had in mind when he’d gone shopping all those years ago.

What he hadn’t expected, was for Henry to rock up to dinner wearing the stupid bunny onesie that Joey had left in his room.

“There,” Henry greeted him with a broad smile, “Now we match.”

It wasn’t fair. Joey wanted to kiss him so badly. The white onesie was a little short on Henry, pulling up just above his ankles, and it still managed to stretch at his shoulders, but it was so fucking adorable and Joey could pin point the exact moment his crush tumbled over the edge into love.

It was the crinkles at the corner of Henry’s eyes as he smiled, the slight tilt of his head, the sparkle in his ocean blue eyes.

Except they weren’t just blue. No, there were specks of golden brown in one eye, that were just captivating. Joey felt like he could so easily get lost in Henry. Every time he looked at the man he found something new and exciting.

“Darling, you look adorable!” he cooed, before he could get too distracted by the fluttering of his own heart. “Very cuddly.”

Henry chuckled and opened his arms wide, allowing Joey to barrel into them. “That was the idea.”

“So, what’s for dinner?” he asked, hoping that Henry would have forgotten that-

“It’s your turn to cook.”

“Bugger,” Joey whined. “Cheesy pasta?”

“You made that last time,” Henry teased.

“I’m very good at carbonara!” Joey countered.

“Melted cheese on pasta isn’t carbonara.”

Joey scoffed. “Eh, close enough.”

“Fine, make your cheesy pasta.”

“Carbonara,” Joey said with a wink. “I’ll add bacon this time.”

The pasta was overcooked and the bacon was a little chewy, but it was dinner, and afterwards Henry made them both extravagant hot chocolates made from actual chocolate rather than powder shit that Joey used. It was covered in whipped cream and marshmallows and had a healthy amount of Baileys to top it off. They curled up on their usual spot on the sofa, buried under blankets and held the warm mugs close to their chests.

If it had been snowing, then Joey would have thought he’d walked into a Christmas film, all it needed was a fireplace and some fairy lights. It was cosy and warm, and a little bit romantic, or it would be if Henry was interested in men and Joey was his type.

No, he couldn’t think like that.

They were friends, good friends, good friends that liked to cuddle and almost kiss if the dog hadn’t interrupted.

It was fine.

Everything was fine.

He took a long gulp of his hot chocolate to stave off his anxiety, not noticing when his nose dived straight into the whipped cream until he looked up to find Henry staring at him with a fond expression. Warmth flooded through Joey’s chest as he returned the smile, feeling high on love and sugar.

“Hi,” he breathed, sounding as love sick as he felt.

Henry’s smile brightened, filling the whole room with light and Joey could have sworn he could hear the swell of violins in the soundtrack of his life.

“Hi,” Henry replied easily as if he hadn’t stolen Joey’s breath, heart and soul. “You- umm, cream, here!”

Henry tapped his own nose.

“Oh cock!” Joey hurried to wipe his nose, almost spilling his hot chocolate in the process, “Fuck! Bugger, shit balls!”

Henry, the bastard, just laughed, his arms reaching out to steady the mug and stop Joey from falling to the ground. “I think you made it worse.”

Joey snorted “I got that, yup, thanks.”

This time he could feel the sticky sweet cream clinging to his cheek, the subtle taste of vanilla on his lips. He pouted up at Henry, gazing through his eyelashes in a way that he hoped could be played off as friendly, but also maybe a little bit seductive. His tongue flicked out to lick his lips and he barely resisted the urge to wink.

Maybe there had been more Bailey’s in his drink than he realised.

Instead, he just wiped his face and snuggled back up to Henry, pulling the blanket up to his chin. They settled on watching Always Sunny, so Joey didn’t really have to concentrate. He let the tension drain from his body as he listened to the familiar TV show and then closed his eyes. Warm, happy and wrapped up in the arms of the man he loved-

Joey fell asleep.

He didn’t notice the way Henry was staring down at him as if he hung the fucking moon and stars, or the inner turmoil his friend was plague with as Henry resisted leaning down to kiss Joey in his sleep.

No, Joey was blissfully ignorant, sleeping better than he had in weeks.

________

The rest of lockdown went by in a blur. Their routine started to seem normal and any doubts Joey had about spending so much time with Henry faded away. They bantered easily like they had on set, laughing and giggling over whatever stupid thing one of them had said. Henry would spend hours playing his video games whilst Joey zoomed Madeleine to work on their new album together. When the regulations relaxed they started to walk Kal together, enjoying the quiet summer days and fresh air. The cuddling never really stopped, and some mornings Joey would wake up still curled up against Henry’s chest, their limbs tangled from the night before.

Those were Joey’s favourite mornings. He’d be stiff all day from sleeping on the couch but he could pretend, for just a few moments, that things were more than they were.

The pining never went away but it was truly the sweetest torture that he’d ever had to endure. The domestic bliss being barely a step away from everything he craved.

And when the time came for Joey to return to his flat with Madeleine, he felt like shit. He didn’t want to go. He wanted to stay in the strange fantasy world he had with Henry, eating too much food and drinking too much wine, cuddling and watching crappy Netflix shows.

Which was why he was sat, staring at a messy pile of clothes on his bed, clothes he’d not worn in weeks. Over the chair were his onesies and a collection of jumpers and hoodies that he’d stolen from Henry over the last few months and weeks. Kal stared up at him from the floor, tail thumping against the carpet.

Joey sighed and ran his hand through his hair, trying desperately to ignore the ache in his chest that was growing more painful with everything second that passed. “I don’t know, Kal. I should be happy about going home.”

Kal didn’t respond, his tail still wagging away just like it always did whenever Joey paid attention to him.

“I miss Madeleine, of course I do, but living with Henry has been great. And you, I love you, big fluffy puppy!” He cooed with a big smile as Kal barked happily and jumped up onto the bed. Joey laughed as he tried to keep his face away from the attack, wrapping his arms around Kal’s neck and pressing his nose into the fur.

“If I tell him how I feel that’s just going to make season two really really awkward, but I just feel like I’m missing a chance, you know?”

If Kal knew, he either didn’t care or just enjoyed watching Joey suffer. There was no reply and Kal just rested his head in Joey’s lap.

“Yeah, right,” he muttered, still running his fingers through Kal’s fur. “You’re no use.”

Kal snorted at that and Joey rolled his eyes.

“But I love you anyway, yes I do!”

“Ready to go?” Henry asked from the door.

“Shit!” Joey yelped. “How long have you been standing there?!”

Henry chuckled, striding into the room and perching on the bed opposite Joey. He reached out to scratch Kal on the head with a dazzling smile. Joey felt his cheeks warm up and he buried his face in Kal’s fur to hide the blush. So many months and he still couldn’t stop his heart from racing whenever Henry smiled. He was pathetic.

And he was running out of time.

He knew it was a bad idea, even entertaining the thought of dating a co-star, but he’d regret it if he didn’t give it a shot. I mean he could always blame the mixed signals if it went wrong. They’d nearly kissed twice and Joey didn’t even cuddle Madeleine as much as he’d cuddled Henry. They were probably the only people that were less touch-starved during the lockdown than before.

So Joey was going to tell him.

Just three words.

He could do that.

Fuck!

He couldn’t do that.

“Joey?” Henry said, reaching out to squeeze Joey’s shoulder.

Joey blinked. Had Henry been talking to him? He’d asked a question so that would make sense. God, his anxiety had gone through the roof, it was like that first day all over again.

“Need to pack,” he mumbled, gesturing at his clothes.

Henry let out a long and heavy sigh, sounding just as thrilled about the idea as Joey did. “I suppose you do, yeah. When is Madeleine due over?”

Joey hummed, glancing at his watch. “Ten minutes ago. Lockdown traffic must be a thing of the past.”

“Pity.”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah,” Henry sighed.

Neither of them moved, both staring glumly at Kal who was happily nestled between them. It was strange but Joey had almost begun to think of Kal as his, theirs. Their home, their life, their dog. He would miss Kal very much.

He would miss Henry even more.

“Do you have a start date yet?” Joey asked, the restrictions were lifting and there were talks about getting back to work again, but it was all up in the air.

Henry shook his head. “Should be getting a call from my agent some time this week. I need to make sure my other projects can work around the schedule.”

Joey smirked, “Or my dear witcher will have a new face next time we meet,” he teased.

Henry scoffed. “Not a chance, you’re stuck with me, bard.”

“You still owe me an apology,” Joey shot back, not quite realising how close they’d gotten during their mock argument.

He swallowed and licked his lips, one hand reaching up to scratch the stubble on his cheek. His face was burning right up to the tips of his ears, his heart thumping in his chest. There was a spark of electricity crackling between them, the scent of coffee lingering on Henry’s breath.

“I’ll make it up to you,” Henry promised, voice hoarse and low, making heat spread through Joey’s body and the world around them seemed to disappear.

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah,” Henry breathed, the words shaky.

Joey longed to reach out and brush his fingertips along the strong line of Henry’s jaw, to feel the scratch of stubble beneath his skin. He longed to tangle his hands in the dark mess of curls, to see if they were really as soft as they looked. It felt as if there was a magnetic force pulling them closer, a string tying their souls together, binding them as one. Joey couldn’t ignore even if he wanted to, and he was over that. He couldn’t live inside his head any longer, not when there was a chance.

Hope.

Deadly, poisoning his very soul, until he could think of nothing except Henry’s lips on his, hands roaming bodies, pulling at hair, unable to resist the promised pleasures of sin. Tongues tangling. Hearts singing. One breath shared between two. Heat. Lust. Love.

Just Henry.

His love.

Joey closed his eyes and pressed his forehead against Henry’s, their lips barely ghosting over each other, you really couldn’t call it a kiss; not yet. One more breath, a millimetre to close the gap.

A horn honked from outside and they pulled apart before they could cross the bridge, past the point of no return.

Joey let out a slightly manic laugh and ran his hands through his hair, whilst Henry went back to stroking Kal as he cleared his throat.

“Bollocks, I still haven’t packed.”

“I’ll invite Madeleine in for some tea,” Henry chuckled, stretching as he stood up.

Kal barked happily and jumped down, wagging his tail as he sniffed at Henry’s socks.

And Joey was left alone once more.

“Fuck!” he groaned, covering his face as he flopped back onto his pillows.

By the time he finished packing, Madeleine and Henry were laughing away in the kitchen like old friends.

Like Joey and Henry had so many times.

He wasn’t special. Henry was just that guy.

Hope.

Dangerous and lethal, stabbing into the heart and tearing the soul apart.

“Ready,” Joey mumbled, holding up his suitcase and guitar. “Might take a couple of trips, I have another bag upstairs and the damn lute.”

“Not sure I ever heard you play the lute?” Henry teased.

“Yeah well,” Joey grumbled and turned away from the kitchen before he could start crying.

He really really didn’t want to cry in front of Henry. What was a little heartbreak between friends? At least he could channel that into Jaskier whenever they finally got back onto set. God, he was a fucking mess.

“I’ll help you,” Henry volunteered because of course he would. He probably just wanted Joey gone sooner.

The poor bloke probably couldn’t wait to have his own space back without Joey’s inedible attempts at cooking, non-stop music and chatter, lazy slobbish evenings in front of the TV.

He wasn’t going to cry.

He wasn’t.

Fuck!

Joey sniffed and stumbled out the door, his hands gripping his suitcase so tight he thought he might break the handle. Back home with Madeleine, to his life, and his bed, and nights spent drinking too much wine and lurking on social media.

He’d just about managed to throw his suitcase into the boot when he heard a loud bark behind him, followed by Henry grunting. Joey was almost knocked off his feet as Kal bundled into him, circling around as he jumped up, winding the lead around Joey’s body and pulling a poor Henry with him.

Not that Joey was particularly complaining about having Henry pressed up against him, but did it have to be when he was crying?

Henry cursed, struggling to keep hold of the lead. Their faces were close and they had to wrap their arms around each other to keep steady. Joey laughed through his tears, reminded of a similar moment from one of his favourite Disney films.

Only Kal was a lot bigger than a Dalmatian.

“I don’t think he wants you to leave?” Henry said, smiling sheepishly.

Joey smiled back despite his broken heart. “Doesn’t look like it.”

“I- I don’t want you to leave either,” Henry whispered so quietly that Joey wasn’t sure whether he’d heard it at all. “I- umm, I like having you here… with me.”

“Oh,” Joey replied stupidly.

“Fuck, I- Joey… Can- can I kiss you?”

The world turned upside down. Joey's heart stopped and everything started to spin. He tried to process the words but nothing seemed to make sense. There was no fucking way that Henry had said that, that he wanted to- wanted to…

Fuck!

“Oh,” he repeated, blinking at Henry as he licked his lips. “I mean. Fuck. No, I mean… Christ. Yes. Please. Yes.”

Henry chuckled and cupped his cheek, pressing their lips together in the most tender of kisses, taking Joey’s breath away right there on the pavement. Joey just giggled when they parted and then swooped back in for another kiss, and another-

And he never wanted to stop.

He didn’t need to breathe, he just needed this; Henry’s lips on his.

Henry had other ideas though, pulling away with a blinding smile.

“Stay with me?”

Joey nodded and threw his arms around Henry’s neck. “God, yes.”

And then they kissed some more. They had months of lockdown to catch up on, after all.

[ikevamp-annalyne]

Hi there! I'd love to see headcanons on the reactions of the suitors (Leonardo, Theo, Comte and Mozart if you're low on time) to the MC cuddling and playing with the suitors' respective pets. If you're not taking requests at the moment, I'm terribly sorry and feel free to ignore this request. I love your headcanons and fics btw ✨

Hi!!! ヽ(｡ゝω・｡)ﾉ Thank you so much for your request: it really means a lot to me! And fjdjdjsbdjsj thank you for loving what I do TwT

(Also, I am not sure about each animal's gender so if I am wrong with one, please do tell me!)

Napoleon:

It's not easy to pet Jupiter since eagles are pretty wild. But Jupiter really likes you, and sometimes, he will land on the balcony and let you pet his head before leaving. Napoleon is surprised at how Jupiter reacts, but he soon smiles and stares at your back, his mind full of "really, even my pet is in love with you, nunuche". He will call Jupiter back a lot just to see the two of you getting along -and he teases Jupiter about it, leading to a bite from him-

Mozart:

Schelm is very calm and not the type to mingle with others. But with you? Godness he is so possessive! Whenever you come to pet Schelm, the owl will ask for more and more pats and hugs. And if Mozart comes in, Schelm will bite him. Mozart and Schelm are in competition for you... So when your boyfriend sees you petting Schelm, aside from being happy you two get along, he will do anything to remind his pet that you are his.

Leonardo:

Cooing and fanboying boyfriend. He looooves seeing you playing and petting Lumiere. He will sit on the floor and observe you from behind, sometimes sketching your games, always internally screaming at how cute you are both. He can look at you for hours, to the point he falls asleep regularly. But when he wakes up and you are both around him, he smiles and hugs you both super tight. And then, cuddle time in bed for the three of you! Lumiere is truly your baby boy.

Arthur:

His baby dog with his lover? Sign him the funk up. He will look at you, literally cooing at the sight of the two of you playing in the garden and being crazy together. Ocasionally getting jealous at how much attention you give to Vic -and how Vic looks proud of it...-. But he will always join the fun, petting his dear doggo while kissing you on the cheek and smiling like a child at how cute your family is.

Vincent:

Brush and his beloved cuddling in his bed while he is getting ready to paint is his deepest wish. So he is more than happy when it happens! He will stare at you both with the most precious smile and will start to paint a portrait of you two, ocasionally coming to play with you, all of you splattered with paint and laughing in his bed. Brush will fall asleep between the two of you, just like a baby.

Theodorus:

When he sees King getting crazy around you, asking for pats and even jumping on you to lick your face up and down, he will grin and let you struggle all alone. It seems like teasing, but he is just enjoying the sight of you two being together because he loves how family-like it looks. And he will melt if Vincent comes in the picture because everyone he holds dear are together.

Isaac:

Baby angel is surprised when he witnesses how Harry lets you pat him, not showing his spikes. He will be super nervous, not wanting any of you to get hurt or scared. But when Harry sleeps in your hands, a sigh of relief from him and a big smile will blossom on his face. You will both feed him, smiling at each other, and you will be like "awww" when Harry yawns.

Jean:

Chérie is a cutie, but he knows she is dangerous so he doesn't let you approach her all alone. But when he sees how Chérie is cute with you, to the point she licks your fingers, he will be happy and smile. He will then teach you everything about her, and you will become so good at taking care of her he will leave her to you anytime he is out.

Dazai:

Bunta will land on your shoulder a lot, and he loooves giving tiny peak hits to have your attention while you are writing. You give him food and pet him while Dazai looks at you from outside the window, grinning while having his legs in the void... And falling. Causing you to run to the window and throw Bunta at him to punish Dazai from being stupid. Bird attack.

William:

Puck is very possessive with William so she doesn't like you. But for her Master's sake, she will let you pet her when he is here, because he will have the brightest smile ever and will hug you then Puck before leaving. Once he has left, Puck will bite you to blood and act like nothing happened... Brat rabbit, and William finds it funny.

Comte:

Time loves to sleep on your stomach while you are napping. When Comte comes in and sees this, he has to leave the room because he is on the verge of screaming and crying of happiness. He will run to Sebastian and asks for a cup of coffee to calm down, while bragging about how his lover and pet are the cutest pair ever. He doesn't show it to you, but it can be seen in his eyes.

Sebastian:

Fraulein is such a scaredy cat. You try to get along with her but she keeps on escaping. Until Sebastian formally introduces you to each other and you can finally pat her head. Sebastian will look calm and composed, but his eyes are fiery and you can clearly read his happiness all over his face. He will write about this day in his new notebook: The Daily Life of MC, lover and fellow coworker.

I hope you liked it! ^^

[sevenkittensinatrenchcoat]

1998 Film Mungojerrie Rewatch Part 3

I’ve had the pictures saved for this for almost a week now, but if you’ve followed the other recent posts on this blog, you can see that I’ve gotten very sidetracked. I’ll probably continue to get sidetracked a lot, but the rewatches will continue.

Now, it’s time once again for The Awful Battle of the Pekes and the Pollicles and The Rest of the Absurdly Long Full Title Rumpus Cat!

But, the twins skipped rehearsals and Jerrie is about to reach peak Doesn’t Know What’s Going On. While Rumpleteazer seems to be able to awkwardly improvise through it with cues from Munkustrap, her brother, with the smaller half of the braincell, is hopelessly lost the entire time. 

As everyone gets into place, Jerrie talks to Jemima, asking what’s going on now. She can’t help him now, since there’s no time to explain. He’ll just have to go to stage right and try his best.

And that’s who Mungojerrie ended up with a shoe on his head, boxes on his paws, an no time to change out of his crop top before it got covered in even more garbage, with absolutely no idea why any of this is happening. Jerrie’s probably had weirder nights out than this, but at least he thought he did something cool in all those stories.

We’ve already gone over the routine of Jerrie messing up his barks, but, not only did Munkustrap point to each twin when it was their turn, not only did Teazer also start pointing to help Jerrie out when he messed up, Jerrie points to Teazer on her first turn, demonstrating some comprehension of how this is supposed to work. And he still doesn’t get it.

He barks twice again, despite everyone, himself included, being aware that this wasn’t right.

Munkustrap can’t figure out if Jerrie’s doing it on purpose or if he’s just that stupid. Really, it could be either one. If he is doing this to troll, Teazer wasn’t in on it and is ashamed to have been involved at all.

Munkustrap suggests that Jerrie should just forget it and go get in line with the other toms. There’s no line forming at the moment, so Jerrie still doesn’t get it and conditions are not about to improve. Teazer laments her existence. 

While Munkustrap prays to every possible feline deity for strength, Jerrie decides to let Pouncival go ahead of him in the line. He assumes that Pouncival was at the rehearsals and knows what they’re supposed to do, so he’ll just follow him. As a kitten, with parents that would care if he skipped rehearsals, Pouncival probably did attend them. He just really wasn’t paying attention. He also never realized that his costume didn’t quite fit and he couldn’t see out of his shoebox. But, Pouncival always likes to be the first to show up to everything, so he’s the one who volunteered to take the lead. You can see Responsible Adults in the line. Asparagus knows what he’s doing. Even Alonzo or Coricopat probably know, but Pouncival went first in rehearsals because Mungojerrie wasn’t there, so they’re used to it by now.

After a lot of nearly crashing into things and going the wrong way, Munkustrap decides that Pouncival needs to be stopped. Jerrie Doesn’t Know What’s Going On. Why are they stopping? How was he supposed to know that Pouncival was leading them the wrong way? Why can’t they just keep going?

After that fiasco, Asparagus gives Jerrie a talking-to. Jerrie wonders why he’s in more trouble than Pouncival is. All of this is very hard to see because the Scottish Pollicles are hard to ignore. Skimble’s a cat who cannot be ignored by his admission and the camera thinks Misto’s the main character.

Enter Tugger on the bagpipes. Jerrie Doesn’t Know What’s Going On. But, this time, nobody does, except for Tugger himself and Pouncival who was in on it. It’s why he didn’t pay attention during rehearsals. He was starstruck that Tugger wanted to conspire with him of all people.

When everyone gets caught up barking, Jerrie Doesn’t Know What’s Going On, so he’s the only one who’s actually behaving himself. That literally never happens, so the idea that he’s become the well-behaved one probably sends him spiraling into an existential crisis.

Coricopat and Jerrie, apparently independently of one another, because they’re looking opposite directions, both decide that since Doggo Go Pant they should have their tonbues out like panting dogs.

And as everyone cowers in fear of the Great Rumpus Cat, Jerrie Doesn’t Know What’s Going On and just points.

Everything I have to say about Jerrie during the Song of the Jellicles basically applies to Teazer as well. But, the two eventually separate and while Teazer stays up front with the her queen friends, Jerrie wanders off and ends up hanging out with Tantomile. It’s really hard to tell Coricopat and Tantomile appear from a distance, but I’m pretty sure it’s her, because throughout the first part of the Jellicle Ball, Jerrie and Tantomile are consistently right next to each other.

You can see that when everyone gathers together to watch a plane go by and then hiss at the camera, Mungojerrie is between Teazer and Tantomile, because she was who he was standing closest to when they flocked together.

You might be wondering why I keep pointing this out, because two character happening to be standing next to one another for a while doesn’t really mean anything, but I think that this might’ve been supposed to mean something and I’ll explain why.

So, we have this Big Sexy Dance where the younger adult queens (and Etcetera) dance and Tugger leads a group of toms to join them. Jerrie is not one of those toms. He spends the scene sitting on the car, watching from a distance. Jenny’s there too, so I guess he’s taking time to say hi to his mom. What a nice young man!

Skimbledad comes along to join the family as the toms and queens pair off. Alonzo dances with Etcetera and George with Cassandra, though they switch partners for the Can’t Believe It’s a Mating Dance. Since Alonzo and Cassandra already appear to be a thing, I don’t know why they didn’t do this before. Etcetera isn’t supposed to be here and Alonzo just decides that since this dance is already becoming an inappropriate disaster, he might as well make a contribution.

Tugger is with Bomba, which is to be expected. They’re basically Friends With Benefits. Plato and Demeter is a bit random, but since Victoria’s not an option Plato has to go with someone else. Why her and not Tantomile? I mean, that’s left poor Coricopat dancing with his sister while most of the other guys are getting to sexy dance with women they’re not related to.

Well, I think this is because, for whatever reason, whether in-universe or out, Coricopat wasn’t actually supposed to be part of this dance at all. Mungojerrie was. If he’d been cozying up to Tantomile before, he’d obviously pair off with her, leaving Plato and Demeter as the only two left.

Tugger leads a group of toms in another dance later, and it’s all the same toms that he leads here: George, Plato, and Alonzo. But, Coricopat is swapped out for Mungojerrie. What if Mungojerrie was supposed to be one of Tugger’s Boys in both dances? Putting him close to Tantomile earlier in the ball would build up to that and since this particular dance is a bit more sexualized than some of the other dances, having two siblings together wouldn’t have fit the pattern.

During the whole Jellicle Ball, Mungojerrie ends up in the back of the crowd quite a bit with Rumpleteazer is usually right up front, on of the more featured dancers. Since we’ve already seen Jerrie and Teazer’s number, they’re equally skilled dancers, so it’s not like they were trying to hide Drew Varley because he wasn’t good enough. But, combined with his absence from Tugger’s number, I think something was going on there. Varley was playing Mungojerrie on stage during this time, so maybe he was getting tired out from doing the show at night and they decided to lighten the load for him during the filming, but he wasn’t the only one in this situation. Jo Gibb, who played Rumpleteazer was in the exact same situation. This whole thing might just be a bunch of really weird coincidences, for all I know. I don’t doubt the qualifications of anyone involved, but this is odd.

So, pretty that Jerrie dances with Tantomile instead of Coricopat. It makes more sense that way.

Mungojerrie’s back for the ballet, but ballet’s not his style, so He Doesn’t Know What’s Going On. Teazer, on the other hand, appears to be hard at work to impress Victoria, the Ballet Queen of the Jellicles.

Okay, Not Mating Dance Time. All pairs of twin siblings end up together for this bit. Coricopat and Tantomile sit next to each other and stare out into space. Meanwhile, Rumpleteazer is really into watching the Platoria action while Mungojerrie is pretty much already asleep, only looking up occasionally. Both Plato and Jerrie are in the club of Tugger’s Boys and both Victoria and Teazer are part of the Hormonal Trio, so they’re both watching their friends hook up here, which has to an interesting experience.

This bit should’ve been in the Teazer rewatch, but I didn’t catch it until later. When everyone falls asleep in the Cuddle Pile, Tugger wraps his arm around a nearby leg. The lighting at this angle made it hard to see whose leg it was, so I, because I have no life, went frame by frame through this portion of the Jellicle Ball and watched the Cuddle Pile form to see where limbs were ending up. I took a bunch of screenshots of everyone’s journey from pairing off to the Cuddle Pile, because why not do that while I was there. But, I eventually figured out that The Leg is Rumpleteazer’s. She tried to cozy up to Tugger when everyone was pairing off and he appeared to turn her down, but I guess he’s humoring her a bit by cuddling with her in the Cuddle Pile.

Jerrie doesn’t acknowledge Grizabella at all, so I’ll just end on this picture of Tugger’s Boys because of my previous claims. George is hiding, but Coricopat and Jerrie definitely swapped out.

[ava-valerie]

I dare you to do the "all about me" Challenge

I was tagged by @hungmanhorsecarriage 💖 Thanks, hun!

✌️Full name✌️: Barbara Maria H.

😳Single or taken😳: Happily married

😘Crushing😘: Taker, Baron, Kane... my big 3

📏Height📏: 170cm (I'm too lazy to look it up)

❤️Favorite color❤️: Pastel pink 💖

😝Girl best friend😝: @luna-loo

💯Boy best friend💯: My hubby 🤭

👰🏽ever want to get👰 married: I already am, but funny tho... I never wanted to... until I met Chris

👨‍👩‍👧want kids👨‍👩‍👧: Yes

🙎🏽if so how many🙎🏽: One would be good as a beginning

👻Snapchat👻:  That's an app, isn't it? 🤪

♒️Zodiac sign♒️: Libra

☕️Last drank☕️:  Water

💀Goth,emo or both💀: Bubblegum Babygirl

👓Glasses👓: Yes

💄Makeup or no💄: Depends on the day, the weather, my mood...

🐱Cat or dog🐶: Doggos!!

😈Evil or good👼🏼: I think I'm good, at least I never harm someone on purpose

⚽️Favorite sport🏀: Wrestling

🐼Favorite animal🐨 : Guinea pigs

😜Weird😜: Yes. Yes I am a weirdo first class

🙅🏽do you have haters: YES! And I am so proud of it, because one of them now even follows me... because they had a fight with the other hater.

😂Funny or nahh😂: My sense of humor is stupid

📱Apple or Samsung: Samsung please

🤓Smart🤓: IQ 124... So... yes?

Now tag 10 people you nominated😏 :

@aj-the-cat @axelsfirecracker @brodieleesclothesline @enigmaticandunstable @justamess44 @jessiebean00 @lasupay3 @new-zealand-chic @omg-im-such-a-masochist