#suddenly deciding he does want to talk to her and demanding she speaks to him???

[yiangchen]

.

[astrophileous]

Love Bugs (Pt. 06)

Pairing: Derek Morgan x Female Reader

Synopsis: You and Derek Morgan have an arrangement. At work, your relationship is strictly business. Under the sheets, it's all about pleasure. Nothing more, nothing less. Until, of course, your feelings start to get involved. Your situation is complicated enough without the unexpexted predicament that suddenly befalls upon you. But with a maniac serial killer on the loose, will you ever get the chance to make everything right?

Warning(s): cursing--there's a lot of it--like a lot, psychopathic behaviors, being held captive, verbal and physical violence, degrading nicknames, talks of death and unaliving someone, strangulation, PLS READ WITH CAUTION BECAUSE THIS PART IS REALLY GRIM I'M NOT EVEN KIDDING

Word Count: 4200-ish

Tag(s): I'm tagging everyone who requested to be tagged prior to the long hiatus, pls tell me if you'd like to NOT be included in the tag list for future updates, thanks! @marvelousgoldroses @jay-2s-world @whore-of-the-pumpkin-patch @maxinehufflepuffprincess @cat-or-kitten @littleshadow17 @itzz-me-duh @geeksareunique @paisleebubbles @whateverrrrrrrrs @crazyunsexycool @louderfortheback @wifeyofeveryone

Author's Note: HI EVERYONE HOW ARE YOU?? I know this is long overdue, but pls enjoy the new part of love bugs! I'm so happy to be posting again and I hope you like what I've got in plans for this series. I think we only have one or maybe two chapters left for this story (depending whether I want to write an epilogue or not lol) but in the meantime, pls enjoy this part and don't forget to LIKE+REBLOG+COMMENT !!! thank you 🌹

Love Bugs Masterlist / Criminal Minds Masterlist

The bullpen of FBI headquarters was still reeling in the aftermath of a Derek-Morgan-shaped hurricane.

Emily was just about to enter the vicinity again when she heard the tail end of Derek's furious words, right before Hotch had ordered him to retreat.

"What was that about?" Emily asked as she approached Rossi's side, eyes never straying from the two men who soon disappeared into Hotch's office.

Rossi never addressed Emily's question. Instead, he gestured for her--and everybody else in the room--to be quiet with a finger on his lips, before he pressed the unmute button on the telephone.

"Hello?"

The UnSub's head jerked at Rossi's unfamiliar voice. You were barely successful in getting him to calm down following Derek's unexpected outburst, but the sound of Rossi's voice was threatening to throw all of those poor attempts straight out of the window.

"Who is that?" he demanded warily. "Where's Agent Hotchner?"

"He had to step away for a second," Rossi notified. "I'm SSA David Rossi. I also work with Agent Hotchner and Agent (Y/L/N)."

"I know who you are."

"Yeah? I still don't know who you are, though."

A responding groan vibrated from the other line. "Why does everyone keep asking me that? Do you think I'm fucking dumb?"*

"No one thinks anything here, pal. Just wanted to know who I was speaking to, that's all." At the UnSub's clear signs of agitation, Rossi quickly added, "It'd be nice to know the person who clearly means a lot to (Y/N)."

Rossi's reassurance obviously managed to trigger the intended effect it had sought. Everyone could see how the UnSub physically deflated at Rossi's words, meaning that hopefully he was soon going to let his guard down.

"I can't tell you who I am," your assailant said, still adamant, although his resolve was wearing thin with each word he had stated. "You're just gonna use it to track me down and keep us apart."

The last syllable of his sentence was emphasized by the weight of his dagger on the side of your neck. You instinctively winced at the unwelcomed touch of the blade before schooling your expression once more so your captor wouldn't notice.

"I promise you, no one is going to do that," Rossi said.

"He's telling the truth," you decided to chime in, surprising everyone including the UnSub whose grip of the dagger had teetered dangerously closer to your pulse point at the sudden proclamation. "They are good people. They don't break promises or tell lies. I promise you, nothing will come between us."

The silence that fell next was heavy with the UnSub's hesitation. Bracing yourself, you forced your head to tilt back, locking eyes with him who was still standing like a guard dog right behind you.

"I swear, Darling," you vowed.

The lull in your voice--or perhaps the fact that you had called him darling in front of your team, which he could arguably take as a display of affection--must have stirred up something in his twisted mind. He actually preened at you before his eyes went right back towards the direction of the camera on the wall.

"My name is Arthur," he confessed.

A particular thread of memory in your brain immediately lit up.

Back in the bullpen, JJ and Spencer were finally returning with documents containing your phone records that they had promptly asked Kevin to gather. Spencer didn't waste any time before perching himself on his desk to start rummaging through the thick pile of files.

"Arthur?" Rossi repeated the name, eyes flicking over to Garcia with a silent request to start cross-referencing the name with the other names they had acquired so far in the investigation.

The tech analyst didn't need to be told twice. She began typing furiously on her laptop as Rossi's attention was drawn back towards the projector.

The UnSub hadn't moved an inch. His hand was still just as sturdy on your shoulder. The blade was also still just as cold as it pressed onto your skin.

One wrong move, and you would end up no better than a slaughter animal on the cold hard ground.

"Do you have a last name, Arthur?" Rossi asked.

The entire bullpen held their breath in anticipation. Rossi had planted the bait as strategically as he could. It was up to the UnSub to take it and slip up the one information that would give them a major lead to end this case once and for all.

But before the UnSub could respond, a muffled beeping resonated in the air, through the telephone line, and finally into the bullpen. The sound was enough to make your assailant faltered.

"I have to go."

It was the last thing he uttered before the line, along with the livestream, went completely dead.

The atmosphere was laden with restlessness as everyone tried to make peace with the fact that they had just lost the only mean of communication they had with you. Without the feed from the livestream, no one could possibly know what was going on. The team would have no idea if something were to happen to you.

They would have no idea how to determine whether you were alive or dead.

"Did you find anything yet, Garcia?" Rossi questioned, although in all honestly, it sounded more like a desperate plea.

The thick regret behind Garcia's eyes gave Rossi the answer he needed to know.

"I can't find any Arthur in our files, sir," Garcia informed.

"Anything from her phone records? What about the hospital?" Rossi tried again.

Emily shook her head almost remorsefully.

"Nothing yet," Spencer spoke up from his place on the desk. "Not a single thing stands out from her records."

"What now?" JJ sighed, exhaustion and worry beginning to decorate the lines on her face.

The whole bullpen stood still, as if everyone was waiting for a slice of miracle to descend into the room, holding a map that would eventually lead the team to where you were still being held captive. But such a map didn't exist in this piece of reality, and the BAU knew that they were running out of time.

"Garcia, did you record the livestream by any chance?" Spencer asked at last.

"Yeah, of course I did."

Penelope punched a few keys on her keyboard before the projector once again came alive with the footage from the livestream.

"Can you fast forward to the very end?" Spencer requested. "And then play it again backwards to the beginning."

"What are you thinking, Spence?" JJ wondered.

"I don't know. I just... maybe there's a detail we missed. At this point, even the smallest piece of clue is worth pursuing."

Several pair of eyes glued themselves on the screen as the livestream footage ran backward at a faster speed. Bated breaths waited in tension for just the tiniest hint that the team could scour to determine your location.

"Wait. What was that?" Spencer interjected. "Garcia, play that again."

"What? What is it?" Emily spoke up.

"Look at her hand." Spencer stood up from the desk, approaching the screen to get a better look. "She's knocking against the chair. Garcia, zoom in on her hand. The left one."

Penelope did as she was asked. "Is that--"

"It's morse code," Rossi muttered, realization overtaking his countenance.

"What is she saying?" JJ questioned.

"A-U--" Spencer began spelling out loud, "--T... Auto. She's spelling auto."

"Auto?" JJ's forehead creased. "As in... auto shop?"

"Her records said she went to a mechanic a week ago," Spencer recalled. JJ immediately rummaged through the papers on Spencer's desk, but the pages flipping inside of Spencer's mind moved at a thousand times more speed than any normal pair of eyes ever could. "Dinozzo's Auto Service, 894 Southwell Street."

"Got it," Penelope chimed in from her place in front of the laptop. "Dinozzo's Auto Shop. Originally owned by Carlo Dinozzo before it was passed down to his two sons after his death a year ago."

"Any of them named Arthur?" Rossi asked

"Nope. Luca and Piero."

"What about the employees?" Emily suggested.

"No. I'm not seeing any Arthur anywhere near that place."

"We profiled that the UnSub could be holding down a steady job in his everyday life," JJ said. "He might not even be related to that place. Maybe (Y/N) encountered him there by chance?"

"Nah, I doubt it." Rossi shook his head. "The bastard's too sophisticated to leave anything up to chance like that. He must have found a way to orchestrate it one way or another."

"There must be a connection somewhere, then. No way he just chose a random place off the map," Emily muttered. "We should cross-reference the name to anyone associated with the Dinozzos."

Penelope began to frantically type something into her laptop. "We've still got three names here. Oh, never mind. Two names, 'cause one of them is dead."

"What do we have on them?" Spencer asked.

"First is Arthur Doyle. He went to high school with Luca and Piero Dinozzo, works in a local company, and looks like he travels a lot for his job," Penelope explained. "There's also an Arthur Harrison, works as an accountant in the heart of Arlington. His dad and Carlo Dinozzo were long-time pals. Apparently, his dad was an accountant too and used to handle the shop's finances before Arthur inherited the office. Oh."

"What? What'd you find?"

"Arthur was engaged," Penelope murmured, "to a Claire Dumont. They were gonna get married last year but the wedding was called off just one month before the D-day."

"Where's Claire now?" JJ asked.

"She moved to Ohio shortly after the breakup, and... oh my God. Guess what?" Penelope looked up, her eyes widening almost comically. "She just announced her engagement three months ago."

Spencer hummed. "That could be the stressor."

An image of a woman suddenly appeared on screen, right above the paused footage of your hand. Everyone stared at the picture in shock.

"That's Claire Dumont," Penelope murmured.

JJ held her breath. "She and (Y/N) could be sisters."

"We've found our guy," Rossi declared. "Garcia, pull up every known address associated with this man. And hurry, we don't have much time."

"I have three properties so far connected to Arthur Harrison. Sending the addresses to all of your phones."

As JJ, Spencer, and Rossi rushed to exit the bullpen, Emily turned around and called out to the others, "I'm grabbing Morgan and Hotch!"

Without stopping to knock, Emily pushed open the door to Hotch's office, ignoring the slivers of tension dancing around in the air.

"We may have something," Emily announced to the room. "We think we know where (Y/N) is."

Your assailant--Arthur, as it turned out--pulled his phone out and pressed a few buttons in, silencing the beeping. Once the noise was gone, the room was quiet again.

He looked at you, then. Piercingly. You squirmed underneath his scrutiny.

"Wait here," he eventually said. "I'll be back."

Without taking a second to breathe, Arthur flew past you and towards the direction he had appeared from earlier.

"Wait! Wait. Where are you going?"

The sound of steps ceased on top of concrete. You waited with bated breath for his response. But the only sound ever came was that of the metal door, and as quickly as you could count to three, he was gone.

At last, you were alone once more.

The traces of adrenaline had begun to dissipate out of your system, leaving you in a shivering mess inside that damp concrete room. Once again, you attempted with all of your might to free yourself from the state of confinement you were in. But the metal cuffs binding you to the chair only dug further into your skin the more you tried to escape, while the chair itself stayed nailed in place no matter how hard you tried to rock it.

After a few more minutes of futile attempts, you were forced to face the reality of your situation.

You were never going to get yourself out of that dingy place alone.

Huffing a breath, you knew that there was nothing more you could do except to hope that your team found the hidden message you had left for them to solve.

And with that last thought conquering every room your head, you let yourself succumb to the impending darkness.

You woke up gasping for air.

It took you a few seconds to remember where you were, to remember that you weren't back in the comfort of your apartment and instead, you were still holed up in the darkened cold room where your abductor had been keeping you captive.

It took a few seconds more to realize that the drowning dream you just had might have been a tad bit more real than you initially thought.

Still reeling in shock, you peered up and locked eyes with your abductor, eyes barely registering the empty bucket he was holding in one of his hands. It didn't take a genius to conclude that he was the one responsible for your drenched state.

"W-what?" you stuttered meekly. "What's going on?"

He only stared at you in response.

"Arthur?"

You shrieked loudly when Arthur threw the empty bucket against the wall, sending a resounding "bang" throughout the whole room and breaking the plastic object into two misshaped pieces.

"Arthur--" you gasped, searching for your voice that seemed to have disappeared beneath the layers of brewing fear, "--w-what... what are you... what's going on? Talk to me."

"I don't want to talk to you, you fucking bitch."

The beating inside your chest fastened. Before you could ask yet another question, Arthur had lunged forward, grabbing a fistful of your hair and tugging your head back so you could stare directly into his eyes.

"You're a fucking liar," he seethed. "You lied to me. Everything you said was a lie, wasn't it?!"

"I don't--" you hissed, trying to ignore the biting pain in your scalp, "--I don't understand what you're talking about."

"Stop fucking lying!!!"

A sharp smack reverberated in the air.

It was only when the ringing in your ear grew louder did you realize that Arthur had slapped your cheek.

Hard.

Ignoring the tingling on the side of your face, you lifted your head once more. The room was spinning, tilting your balance left and right, but you held your ground through it all.

"What did I lie to you about, Arthur?" you asked carefully.

He threw something at your feet. It clanged against the hard ground below before landing face up near your toes.

It was your phone.

But the fact that Arthur somehow had your phone in his possession wasn't what caused the sick feeling to stir northward in your belly.

It was what you were seeing on the now cracked screen of your phone: a picture of you and Derek. A selfie that you had impulsively taken of the two of you in bed after one of your nighttime escapades.

For awhile there, you had briefly forgotten about that photo. It was another lost memory in the ocean of rubble left behind in the wake of your fallout with Derek. Seeing that photo again after such a long time triggered waves of emotions that you had been desperately burying for the past few weeks.

The longing, the guilt, the heartache.

The regrets.

The regret of ending your little arrangement so abruptly in such a hostile manner. The regret of not telling Derek sooner about the baby. The regret of maybe never being able to see Derek for one last time.

But most importantly, it was the regret over not revealing the truth of what your heart felt for him that was eating you alive.

"You're fucking him," Arthur fumed, eyes blazing with an indescribable fury that made your entire body shudder.

"Arthur, please... I can explain--"

"Shut the fuck up."

He stepped forward once more, crowding your personal place and rendering you helpless underneath his psychopathic gaze.

"Tell me the truth, and if you dare lie--" Arthur paused, his hand disappearing behind his back before it appeared again with a dagger that he promptly pressed against your abdomen, "--don't ever dream of meeting your child."

"Okay. Okay, I'll tell you the truth."

"You're fucking him, aren't you?"

The bile in your throat had tripled in size. Swallowing it down, you tried to even your voice out as you answered, "I was."

"Ha," he scoffed. "I knew it. You fucking whore. You're no better than any of them."

To your relief, he eventually chose to retract the dagger and stepped away from you, opting to circle the room like a distressed lion in a cage. But even with the blade no longer touching your skin, you knew very well that the danger wasn't over yet and that things could escalate even further in a matter of seconds if you weren't careful.

"Arthur," you called out to him softly, slowly, as to not startle him and risk doing something that would trigger a psychotic break. "Arthur, please. You have to listen to me. That arrangement ended long ago. It meant nothing to me. It happened long before I met you."

Arthur's voice echoed coldly as he replied, "I don't believe you."

"Please, Arthur--"

"That's his child, isn't it?" he cut you off, pointing the tip of the dagger at your belly. "What he said on the phone. He said my child. That's because it's his. You're having Derek Morgan's child."

"No--"

"I thought you were different. I thought you were the one." The dagger in his hand shook with venom. "But you're just the same as the rest of them."

"I'm not. Please, I'm not--"

"I have to start searching again. For the one. You're not her, which means she's still out there."

"Arthur--"

"I'll have to get rid of you."

"Arthur, please!" Your voice cracked, leaking of terror and desperation larger than anything you had ever known. When something wet touched the side of your nose, you realized then that you had started to cry. "Arthur, you have to believe me. I've ended everything with him. There's nothing between us anymore."

The words you uttered kept lingering in the air in a bubble made out of despair. But as if every single one of them had fallen on deaf ears, your captor paid no attention to them. Not even a single acknowledgment to your pleas.

Instead, he had begun taking careful steps forward. Silent and deadly, like a predator stalking its prey.

"Arthur, please! I choose you!"

To your shock, his steps faltered upon your words.

For a moment, you could taste relief on the tip of your tongue before it was washed away by the knowledge that you were not entirely out of the woods yet. But from the corner of your eye, you could see the slight loosening of Arthur's grip around the dagger. It filled you with enough hope to push forward.

"I'm choosing you, Arthur," you stated confidently, trying to convince him of your sincerity. "I don't care about Derek. I'm done with him. I'm done with my old life and everyone in it. I'm ready to leave everything behind to be with you. I choose you."

"You choose me?"

"Yes. I choose you to take care of me. To take care of this baby. The three of us can be a family. How does that sound?"

Seconds ticked into minutes. Minutes stretched into a long silence. The anticipation threatened to break your chest in half.

When he finally began to move once more, Arthur surprised you. He threw the dragger towards a darkened corner in the room, far away from his reach and, most importantly, far away from the possibility of it harming the growing life inside of you.

When Arthur took off the ski mask he had been wearing since the first time you opened your eyes in that harrowing place, you weren't at all surprised to see the face staring back at you. After all, it was the same face belonging to the man who had stopped his car for you when your own car had mysteriously broken down in the middle of the road just around two weeks prior. The same face who offered a business card of his friend's auto shop where you eventually went to get your vehicle fixed.

In retrospect, you should have been at least a little bit suspicious by the whole ordeal, but was it really your fault for choosing to put your trust in the good of humanity?

You knew there was no point in dwelling over what-ifs anymore. Arthur would've found a way, like any psychopath would, and you would've still ended up being tied up in this dismal room with him.

"Did you mean it?" Arthur asked.

You put on your best fake smile before answering, "Yes."

He grabbed you in his arms in just two long strides.

You wanted to throw up. You hated the feeling of his fingers stroking your back. You wanted to kick him away and get this piece of shit as far away from you and your baby as possible. You wanted to rid yourself of the lingering smell of him that had now undoubtedly transferred into your skin.

And maybe, you would've done all of those things if it was only your life that was on the line.

Unfortunately, fighting back was a luxury you couldn't afford anymore. So, you were forced to stay quiet instead, letting your captor whisper sweet nothings in your ear as if it didn't repulse you even being in the same room as him.

You were close to counting towards the 200s in your head when, suddenly, a clanking noise in the distance ripped your attention away.

In a split second, Arthur had peeled his arms from around you and got back on his feet. You knew then that he must have heard it, too.

You watched as he stepped away, dragging a crate from one corner of the room and placing it strategically underneath the only opening on the walls. He got on top of the crate to allow himself to peek outside, but whatever he saw must have startled him greatly. Because the next thing you knew, he had backed away from the wall in the blink of an eye, face crumpling in what could only be described as panic.

"The cops are here," he managed to sputter out.

"What?"

Your heart was hammering inside of its cage. The cops are here. You realized then that the team must have solved the clue you left them. They had solved the case, and they were coming to save you.

Derek was coming to save you.

"What did you do?!"

In a moment of weakness, you had allowed yourself to rejoice in the promise of freedom that you momentarily forgot you actually hadn't possessed it yet. The slip-up was miniscule, but it wasn't fleeting enough to escape the attention of your captor.

"You tricked me!" Arthur's voice boomed throughout the room, carrying rage unlike anything you had ever known. "I trusted you, and you lied to me! Again."

"Arthur--"

This time, there was no room for negotiation.

Arthur didn't even waste a millisecond before he dove forward. He was a lion, and you were the deer. His sharp teeth were calloused fingers, and they dug into your skin as Arthur tightened his grip around your throat.

"You lied to me. You lied to me."

He repeated those words like a mantra, his voice drowned out by desperate gasps as you tried to scour for what little bit of air you could still revel in. Your feet and arms shook beneath their restrains. Your head pounded from the pressure that had gathered inside your skull.

In that moment, death was imminent.

You could feel it coming. You could feel its claws clutching every single drop of life that was still remaining in your bloodstream. It was a battle between the two, and unfortunately, death was winning.

As the dark spots in your vision spread into a massive blotch, you allowed yourself to say goodbye. To life. To the world. To the memories of your loved ones whose faces you wished you could've memorized one last time.

To Derek, the one who could've been, the one you wished had been.

And to the child in your womb, the one you wished you could've met, the one you wished you could've saved.

When darkness came, you expected it to be cold and unforgiving, but as it turned out, darkness was easy. Simple. It welcomed you into its home with open arms, shielding you from the cruelties of the mundane world.

As it pulled you deeper into its abode, you could faintly hear the sound of your name being called repeatedly. It sounded similar. It sounded like home.

But this was your home now, so without turning back, you allowed darkness to lead you further down the dim path. Away from the pain and the heartbreaks of life. Far from the evil that lurked in the streets behind their well-crafted masks.

In the darkness, there was nothing.

In the darkness, you were nothing.

And nothing was exactly what you were going to be.

[neptuneiris]

for the crown (02/03)

and then suddenly i cared even less, too broken to stay.

pairing: prince!aemond × lowborn!reader

summary: you gave yourself to him, you love him, he said that despite your low status at court, he will still marry you, because you are his, the woman who was his friend since childhood, until the war comes.

word count: 8.6k

previous part • next part • series masterlist

and here I am again, realizing that I can't anticipate that it will be two parts only, because if I leave it at two, the chapter will be extremely long, so there will be part 3 haha. thank you for reading, enjoy!🥰

warnings: sex content, angst, denigration, abusive behavior, possessiveness, infidelity, betrayal.

If Aemond thought he would have a perfect escape with you after he decided to take you with him to Harrenhal as well, he was wrong.

With only a few dresses, a few pairs of shoes and your night gown, you emerge from your chamber holding Aemond's hand, both of you having a firm grip on each other, ready to march to DragonPit and eventually fly to Harrenhal.

With the entire Prince Regent's army ready to listen to Sr. Criston Cole's command upon seeing Aemond's signal in the skies, your prince is interrupted in the middle of his action as he is basically stealing you away by his mother, his grandsire and also your father right at the gates to leave the Keep.

Your father watches you completely surprised, ready and willing to leave with the prince, while the Queen Dowager and Otto Hightower watch Aemond completely confused and alert.

Also both watching you basically not understanding anything.

"Aemond, what is the meaning of this?"

"What are you doing?"

His mother and grandsire instantly inquire, clearly disapproving of this madness, but Aemond couldn't care less, watching the three of them indifferently.

While you start to worry and basically hide behind him, not letting go of his hand.

"Y/N?"

Your father calls you softly, confused and uncomprehending, looking for your gaze.

But when you look back at him, he knows you've already made your choice, so he begins to get more alert and seriously worried.

"What are you doing?"

But you don't answer him, you can't.

Sorrowful, you seek more reassurance and support from Aemond, basically leaning closer to him, holding his hand a little tighter, revealing your nerves and your fear at having been discovered.

This Aemond notices instantly and stands in front of you with a determined and firm stance without letting go of your hand, facing this alone knowing that none of the three of them stand a chance against him.

"Y/N, come, please," your father pleads as he sees worried the prince's behavior, raising one of his hands in your direction.

"She will do no such thing, my Lord."

Aemond finally speaks, drawing the attention of the three of them as well as yours, watching him over his shoulder,

"Lady Y/N will come with me to Harrenhal. In fact we must leave now and this is not up for discussion," he makes it clear almost threateningly.

Your father immediately exchanges glances with the Queen, more than concerned and demanding that something be done about it, but the Queen Dowager also continues to stare at her son completely confused and as if she does not recognize him.

"Aemond, you can't do this," she tells him gently wanting to talk some sense into him.

"Have you forgotten about your betrothed? Lady Baratheon?" his grandsire inquires him seriously, "Her father is fully supporting you in this because of that betrothal. And when Lord Borros finds out you are enjoying the company of another woman he will not be very pleased and will call off his men."

"And that won't be very wise of him," he says completely disinterested, "It would be unwise for Lord Borros to no longer give me his support if he doesn't want all of Storm's End to burn."

"That's not how things work, Aemond," his mother tells him worriedly, watching him intently.

"I think that's exactly how things work, mother," he tells her in a more serious tone, "After all, I'm not breaking off the betrothal and eventually I'll have to marry his daughter or not?"

This immediately gets your attention, but right after Aemond says those words, he lightly squeezes your hand with his, as a signal.

He has told you that when the war is over, he will marry you and that he promised you. He's not meaning all this now, it's just a way for the two of you to finally leave.

"Aemond, you still can't do this, you're betrothed," she insists.

"And what about Lady Y/N?" his grandsire points out to him, "According to the news, she is also betrothed."

"I don't care. She's coming with me whether you like it or not," he says as a final word.

"My prince…"

Hour father quickly steps forward to speak, worried and almost anguished.

"I beg you not to do this, you cannot take her away, please," he begs, "Lord Hand is right, she is also betrothed. If you take her now her betrothed will not be pleased and will put her maidenhead in question. Because of this my daughter will probably not be able to find a good husband in the future."

His words and behavior makes you feel sorry for your father, as he is right. Basically Aemond will ruin you for all men by taking you away, that action already speaking for itself, as the two of you share a more intimate relationship.

What your father and his family don't know is that he has basically already ruined you by claiming your maidenhead. But of course neither Aemond nor you will say it out loud.

"Don't worry, my Lord," he tells him still disinterested, "I'm sure by the end of all this, you and I will come to a generous agreement for my indiscretion."

Still, this does not reassure your father at all.

"B-but, please my prince, you c-can't…" he begins to speak nervously, looking at you pleadingly, "You can't take her away, please. I have already come to an agreement with her betrothed, they'll be waiting for her to discuss the wedding, please—

"I've told you not to worry, Lord Y/L/N," Aemond tells him again seriously and annoyed.

"But…

"You dare to question your prince's order?"

Aemond inquires him instantly, watching him serious, threatening and expectant, while your father purses his lips into a thin line as Aemond continues to threaten him with his gaze, then looks at his mother and grandsire in the same manner.

"You are also against my own word?"

"Aemond, please," his mother pleads with him as well.

"Don't be a fool, Aemond. Enough of this nonsense," his grandsire tells him seriously, "You are making a big mistake that will cost you the battle if you lose soldiers."

"That will be my problem, not yours," he tells her in the same manner as he does, ready to resume his journey again, "Besides we are not going to lose anything and I advise you not to question me anymore, any of the three of you," he warns them.

These are the final words of Prince Aemond, the Prince Regent, the one who currently holds the crown and carries the weight of the entire Realm on his shoulders, with his other hand he takes your waist and begins to lead the two of you on your way out of the Keep.

The only thing you can feel at that moment as you walk away is the worried and anguished look on your father's face, while you feel sorry for him.

However, you don't want to marry this Lord Beesbury, you don't even know him and you know that your father blindly gave your hand in marriage.

But what you didn't expect is that you would have to walk away from your father, leaving him alone, when it has always been the two of you against the world, which is what really weighs on you and grieves you as you continue to walk away from him with no idea when you will see him again.

You also feel the stares of the Queen Dowager Alicent and Lord Otto on both of you, who probably don't even have any idea how to react to this, not even being in a position to do anything about it.

But Aemond doesn't even care about them and steadily and willingly continues his pace with you by his side, him leading you towards one of the horses that will take you both fast towards DragonPit.

Soon you both find yourselves flying towards Harrenhal, with Sr. Criston leading Aemond's entire army on the ground towards the cursed castle as well.

However… had you known what would await you later in that very place, a cursed castle where its curse never leaves and curses also the people who dare to set foot there, you would never have let Aemond take you with him.

Still, when your prince takes you with him to Harrenhal, you feel important.

You feel you are one of his complements to go on and win the war, like an incentive to gain motivation and strength.

At first, the black and dark castle scares you, knowing perfectly well its reputation and curse, but Aemond is the one who motivates you to stand by his side and help him in everything he needs.

He specifically asks you to settle in his chamber, where it will also be your room, while he once he takes over the castle, begins to plan strategies and move his entire army, alert to any threat and securing his position in Harrenhal.

You know very little about his planning because you know that his matters must be of no interest to you, so during the day, you can only find entertainment in books and learning a little more about the dark castle.

The only thing you attend to is your prince, waiting each night at the end of his exhausting days, as you can't really do much in these circumstances, only being available to him.

This fact does not bother you, but your boredom increases every day considering that you only see Aemond in the nights and very early the next day he is no longer by your side because he goes to attend to his duties.

In your loneliness, you often think about writing a letter to your father, just to let him know that you are well.

But you know that Aemond probably wouldn't be too pleased and you don't know if your father wants to hear from you after what happened.

You wouldn't be surprised if he was furious with you… after all, what you did was very unwise.

You could have stood firm with Aemond, you could have supported your father and attended to your duty properly, yet you did not.

And in the end the only thing that gives you comfort is that at least, by the end of these difficult times, you will finally marry Aemond. And by the time your father sees that, he will probably forgive you.

Today is another one of those days when Aemond has a lot on his mind, taking his position very seriously and getting frustrated when one thing doesn't turn out the way he expected.

It's a lot to handle even though he has Sr. Criston by his side, but that doesn't seem to be enough.

He constantly sends reports to Kings Landing with his position and what is currently happening, understanding that even though Aegon is injured, still his brother wants to be aware of everything, considering he is not at the Keep to protect them in case of anything.

There are countless times when Aemond does not rest properly as he has so much to think and do. And when he finally heads to his chamber almost at the Hour of the Wolf, you help him to get all that stress out of his system.

Aemond lets out a sigh as he lets his head fit all the way back, with his eye closed, as you begin to slowly move up and down his entire hard, heavy, swollen length, in need of release.

You moan and place your hands on his bare, firm chest for support, beginning to move your hips up and down in a more consistent pace, moving back and forth and even circling at times.

Aemond at all times lets you take control, which normally it is not usual for you to do as he prefers it to be him in charge, however this is another one of those nights where he is too tired not to let you ride him.

You groan and begin to move your hips faster and harder, as Aemond moans low and holds your waist firmly, watching as your bodies come together and as all of him repeatedly enters you.

You watch him in complete delight, his beautiful face contracted in pleasure, his brows furrowed and his lips parted, sighing and leaving marks on your skin with his long fingers.

You smile and lean fully into him, still moving, as you bring one of your hands to his hair, stroking it gently, and then bring your lips to his ear.

"Do you like it, my King?"

This only fills Aemond more with pleasure, who grunts and makes you increase the speed of your movements, as you moan loudly and feel him deliciously also ground on his feet and penetrate you harder.

The sound of skin on skin, your juices with his sweat and now Aemond claiming one of your breasts as he takes the nipple into his mouth, only makes you moan more in pleasure.

"Oh yes, my King. Just like that, please."

You whine, moaning and leaning further into him.

"Oh fuck—yes," he murmurs into your breasts, kneading them completely to his liking, "Yes, my Lady. Oh Gods."

You sigh and moan louder when Aemond suddenly takes all your hair in one of his hands, making it into a fist, to forcefully pull you down as he raises his hips in a firm upward motion, penetrating you hard and hitting exactly your nerve core.

All the air escapes your lungs and that explosion inside you begins to grow as Aemond penetrates you in that steadier way, not letting go of your hair, holding you tight.

"Are you going to cum?" he asks you in a deep husky voice.

"Yes," you moan, "Oh—fuck," you whimper.

"Cum, cum all on my cock, my sweet girl."

Then you are no longer thinking straight and become completely absorbed in the moment as he brings one of his hands between your bodies and begins to stroke his thumb over your most sensitive spot, causing you to close your eyes tightly, arch your back and continue to move with more fervor.

"Yes, yes, just like that," you moan, "Please, don't stop."

"Look at you," he grins, "Making a mess."

"Please, my King."

He grunts and increases his speed more as he again begins to suck on one of your nipples and then everything about you explodes in a delicious and more than satisfied way as Aemond fucks you hard across your peak, seeking his own release.

And by the end of the night, with one hard, strong, final thrust, he spills all of his seed inside you, filling you completely.

You let yourself fall completely on top of him, just as exhausted and breathing fast, catching your breath, as Aemond continues all soft and warm inside you.

You relax your lips and lazily raise your gaze to him, while still remaining on top of his hard, strong body, to see him also catching his breath, calming his heart rate and looking so tired.

You leave a soft kiss on his lips and move off on top of him to lie down next to him.

As every night, Aemond pulls your body to him and hugs your back as the two of you begin to be carried away by sleep, both of you more than satisfied, especially him after so much pressure and stress.

This is the way you can help him and be there for him. Honestly you don't complain, because as each time Aemond takes you, everything becomes more and more intense, already being more of a necessity.

Even during the day, one of his guards seeks you out and lets you know that the prince has requested your presence immediately in the room where Aemond plans his strategies and has meetings with all his advisors.

Arriving there, you expected anything but Aemond needing to fuck you right there in his chair and where it is a public place, even though only he and you is here.

"Try not to make too much noise, my love."

That's all he says to you and then makes you start riding him again, while you hold on and lean on his shoulders, moaning into his neck, while he listens to the sounds you make only for him and continues to demand that you move faster, harder and deeper.

You let your whole head fall back, closing your eyes in pleasure and you part your lips, as Aemond attacks and leaves marks all over your neck, grunting and holding you as if his life depended on it.

You move deep from front to back and he moans into your neck.

"Oh fuck—just like that, don't stop," he tells you hoarsely.

You gasp and muffle your moans as he desperately makes your breasts spring free through the collar of your dress and attacks them like a hungry man, as he brings both hands to the soft skin of your ass, kneading both your cheeks.

You cry out from the pleasure and continue to move deep from front to back.

"Yes, Aemond, yes," you moan.

"Always so responsive," he murmurs with delight.

He gazes proudly at your hard nipples, slightly red and swollen from his caresses, as he brings his hand to your center and strokes you with his thumb firmly, feeling all your juices sliding down his fingers.

"You like it, don't you?" he watches you with a grin, "You like it when I fuck you hard."

"Yes," you say as best you can, in a whisper.

He grunts and stops your movements abruptly to suddenly charge you and rise from his chair, as he sits you on the edge of the big table in front of him where the maps perch and begins to penetrate you faster and harder.

That time you had to drink moon tea again, considering that the dragon seed is strong and Aemond insists that always after every act, you must drink it, not even being able to let yourself forget it.

So the days go by when the unexpected news arrives about the battle of Lakeshore, where Aemond loses numerous men, all from the Lannister army, where they were attacked by a Northern army, being a major loss for the Greens and a victorious battle for the Blacks.

Aemond, furious, orders the death of Simon Strong and his entire family, as well as nearly killing the soldier who told him the news, blinded by his own anger and madness.

While you confined to your room, you can only wait for him to return to you when he has taken care of the whole matter, but with that great loss, Aemond and everyone begins to realize that they are losing the war.

If before Aemond didn't sleep and rest properly, with this news he doesn't anymore, to which you can only continue to wait, worried about him but unable to truly do anything, spending days in which you don't see Aemond anymore.

Until one night, the unexpected news arrives, but this time only for you.

"Where is Prince Aemond, Ellya?" you ask the maid who has been at your disposal since you arrived here, "Have you seen him? Do you know what he is doing with his men?"

She gives you a somewhat wary and curious look at the same time.

"You haven't heard, my Lady?"

This immediately catches your attention and you watch her completely attentively.

"About what?"

She blinks a couple of times, watching you a little surprised, to which this draws your attention more and alerts you, watching her intrigued, while she looks hesitant for a few moments, not quite sure if she is the one to tell you the new news.

"Ellya, what's wrong?" you urge her, beginning to worry.

She swallows hard, lets out a long breath and looks at you with some pity.

"The prince has approached the witch, the witch of Harrenhal," she lets you know, "For days now it seems the two of them started having their meetings."

You watch her more than attentively and confused at the same time, having no idea who this witch is, but instantly getting a bad feeling about the whole thing. You ask Ellya to explain who she is and she tells you everything.

Alys Rivers.

That's her name and apparently she's a bastard of Lyonel Strong, the once lord of Harrenhal who burned to death along with his son right here in this castle.

When you then remember… she is that same woman that Aemond did not give the order to kill and apparently spared her life when he killed Simon Strong and all his kin.

Instantly your assumptions are correct when Ellya tells you that this woman possesses dark magic and those kinds of abilities through witchcraft. And again you don't get that good feeling if Aemond has searched for her and is apparently having meetings with her.

Certainly after knowing this, you can't ask Aemond anything about it since you don't see him and don't dare go looking for him with all the duties he has to attend to.

However, the uncertainty lingers and all the time you think about it, feeling worried just imagining Aemond having encounters with her and also scared about what she might do.

Until one night finally the opportunity presents itself when you see the night through the small windows in comparison to the Keep, unable to fall asleep, when the doors open and you turn to see Aemond enter the chamber after so many days.

"Aemond?"

You call out to him in your soft, sleepy voice from trying to fall asleep but you simply can't, thinking all the while of him and her, the witch, as he watches you without at all expecting to hear your voice.

And even though you shouldn't, at that moment you feel sorry for him. You can tell he hasn't slept well in days, his whole face shows it to you, the extreme tiredness reflecting through his body as well, truly worrying you.

And that's why he actually watches you without having any expression on his face, leaving his sword on one of the tables and starting to take off his belts, preparing to sleep.

"Keep sleeping. I'll join you in a moment," he tells you just the same without much emotion in his voice.

"Where have you been?" you still ask him, carving your eyes, watching him closely, "I haven't seen you in days."

He lets out a long breath, turning his back on you and continuing to remove his clothes.

"Are you forgetting that we are at war?" he asks, "What do you mean, where have I been? Of course I have been leading all my men and attending to my duties as Protector of the Realm."

You press your lips together, instantly understanding that you must not upset and irritate him any more than he clearly already is. Still, like the stubborn one you are, you can't help yourself and again speak in his direction.

"I know, Aemond," you say softly, "But that's not what I meant. I meant that you didn't come here to sleep."

"I barely have time to sleep, Y/N," he tells you definitely more serious, alerting you, "And now that I finally have the chance, you're not letting me have my five minutes of peace," he tells you bitterly.

"No, Aemond, I swear that's not my intention," you instantly clarify, concerned.

"Then?" he looks over his shoulder at you, serious and clearly irritated, "You're going to let me be able to undress and sleep in peace?"

"Yes, of course," you tell him instantly, bewildered, "I-I just wanted…" you bite your lips, nervous, "…to know where you'd been," you mumble barely audibly.

And even though Aemond has heard you, he still doesn't say anything else, still taking off his clothes and with every movement feeling more tiredness all over his body, urgently needing to lie down on the bed and sleep as much as he can.

But you continue to watch him more attentively than before, Alys Rivers not leaving your thoughts and what he has talked or has been doing with her, that precisely not leaving you alone.

So in the middle of the silence, you dare to ask him in a soft murmur, watching him carefully.

"You were with Alys Rivers?"

Then suddenly Aemond stops his movements abruptly, slowly turning his head towards your direction, but only a part of it, barely managing to watch you over his shoulder, the tension in his whole body being more than visible.

When without further ado he resumes his movements, saying absolutely nothing to you and turning his back to you, while you continue to watch him attentively and expectantly for his response, whatever it may be.

And it is not until Aemond finishes processing your question that he finally answers you or rather answers you with another question in a serious and cold voice.

"Who told you that?"

You swallow hard, truly not wanting to give Ellya away.

"I heard it."

"From who? Where?"

He demands to know, more serious and annoyed, turning fully towards you. That's when you see his dark face, clearly annoyed, you stare at him bewildered, really not understanding his behavior.

"What's wrong? Why didn't you want me to know?"

At this he continues to stare at you annoyed, his lips pressed into a thin line and clearly irritated by your questioning, while you, starting to feel fearful, still continue to stare at him with your whole face soft but in confusion.

Aemond lets a few seconds pass, when he averts his gaze from yours for a moment as he licks his lips and finally lets out a long breath to turn his back on you again.

He reassures himself, having already taken into account from before that it would be impossible for you not to hear the name of the witch of Harrenhal and also how he would find himself in her company at times.

However, in a way I had hoped that you wouldn't find out and wouldn't question anything about it.

But with everything going on, him losing the war and resorting to desperate measures, there is basically no such thing as his patience and good humor.

"She's helping me with some war matters, nothing else."

He tells you coldly as you watch him and listen completely attentively, not understanding his answer.

"War matters?" you repeat.

"Yes, war matters," he repeats back to you as well, serious.

"And it's not something I can help you with?" you ask him without understanding.

He lets out a long sigh again this time, his patience again beginning to hang by a thread.

"No Y/N, you don't know all of Riverlands and the most convenient spots where I can send and command my men," he tells you serious, "Nor do you know the secret paths and where they might attack us by surprise, but she does."

At this you remain completely silent, watching him with your lips parted, thinking about his words.

This really continues to give you a very bad feeling, frustrating you because even though he has explained, you still don't feel convinced and can't do anything about it, not wanting to bother him anymore.

But it strikes you how he has been annoyed that you have asked him about her, that you have talked about her, so bringing up the matter again would not be smart on your part.

Still, you can't stay quiet.

"Nothing else?"

"Yes, nothing else," he tells you quickly and still in his serious tone.

You don't say anything else, watching him attentively, while he remains completely naked in front of you, as he usually likes to sleep. And still not feeling convinced, you decide not to bother him anymore and return to your same position as before to be lucky enough to sleep this time.

But you can't.

You continue watching the void, when you feel Aemond's weight sinking on the bed next to you, while you turn your back to him and think about his words, also about the witch and the two of them.

You press your lips together and finally close your eyes, needing to sleep to stop thinking.

However, this one night Aemond doesn't even come close towards you. Normally he always wraps one of his arms around your body and pulls you close to his body to sleep close, but nothing, he doesn't do anything.

And the next morning you wake up, he is gone.

Your days again pass without seeing Aemond, always being in your chamber and barely getting any news about what is going on with your prince and his side of the war.

At least you find comfort in your maidservants, with whom you talk and give you some company.

You also wander around the castle only a little during the day, not lasting long for fear that Aemond might find out and get annoyed with you not having any guards with you. But considering you don't have much to do, this comforts you as well.

When one day, the whispers in the cursed castle become too loud and rumors reach your ears: your prince is sharing a bed with the witch of Harrenhal.

This shocking and devastating news you don't want to believe, thinking that it is simply impossible because Aemond is yours, just as you are his. Or so you thought.

But even though you try to convince yourself that Aemond wouldn't do such a thing to you, betray you with another woman, let alone a witch, sadly it all starts to make sense to you.

He hadn't gone to sleep in his chamber, you also chambered, basically you didn't see him at all. And even though he told you he barely has time to sleep, he still must have… but not in the room you both share.

You really don't want to believe it, especially since he told you himself that she's only been helping him with war matters, nothing else.

But you knew all along that he wasn't being honest with you, you had that intuition and these rumors just confirmed it.

It is not until you see Aemond again after severe days without him being in your presence that you can finally confront him about it.

"You lied to me, didn't you?"

You ask him with your soft tone but sad at the same time, disappointed, with tears wanting to start coming out of your eyes when he watches you and he doesn't even need to ask you what you mean, because he instantly knows.

But it hurts you more when he lets out a long breath, it being another one of those times where you both barely see each other and he's already upset and annoyed by your behavior.

"See? This is why I didn't tell you, because of how you react," he tells you serious and watching you badly, tired.

"So you were planning to never tell me?" you ask sadly.

"You don't understand Y/N. You don't understand anything."

You look at him hurt.

"And how am I supposed to understand if you don't talk to me?" you ask confused, "Is this why you decided to bring me here with you? For me to stand here waiting for you while you enjoy the company of another woman?"

He lets out a huff as he rolls his eye in annoyance.

"You're getting it all wrong," he tells you serious, "I'm not doing it for my own satisfaction, I'm doing it because it's necessary and in order to win the war."

You continue watching him confused, not understanding what he is referring to or rather not understanding what that has to do with lying with her, to which Aemond, frustrated, explains to you in order to end this matter once and for all.

"Alys… she can see things, she knows things" he tells you, "Her power helps me to know what will happen next and what exactly I must do against the threats, what strategies to plan in order not to lose more of my men and thus win the war."

"And for that you must sleep with her?" you ask in pain.

"Getting that kind of information is not easy, Y/N," he tells you absurdly, "Of course she must have asked me for something in return and that is her form of payment."

You deny with your head, still watching him confused.

"But you don't necessarily have to pay her that way. You are the prince, she must obey you and in return for that… you can offer her gold or something else."

Crees que eso no fue lo mismo que yo pensé en ofrecerle?

"Do you think that wasn't the same thing I thought of offering her?" he inquires you annoyed, "Of course I did but she give me nothing."

And yet he decided to give her exactly what she wanted.

Your mind tells you, as you continue to watch him intently and pained, as he turns his back to you and you see him starting to take off his belts at the same time you feel that sharp pain in your chest, thinking about all the weeks he had been keeping this from you.

And when you asked him, he still lied to you.

"But…" you try to say, watching him sadly, "I'm sure you don't need her, Aemond."

He lets out a derisive, dry snort, shaking his head slightly, this hurting you instantly as well, but you continue to insist on changing his mind so that he doesn't have to do this… win the war through witchcraft.

"There are other ways that I know are more complicated and time consuming, but you can win and fairly, I know that," you observe him hopefully.

He laughs unfunnily, low and bitterly, as he turns to you again and looks at you as if you were a fool.

"How easy it is to talk when you're not the one serving the Realm and losing a war, isn't it?"

You watch him completely speechless, while he takes a couple of steps towards you watching you even in that way and completely upset and annoyed because you don't understand him.

You don't understand anything of what is happening and what he must be doing.

"What are you doing here besides warming my bed, hmm?"

He inquires you with a cruel tone, his words instantly being a dagger to your heart.

"Yes, it's true, I was the one who decided to bring you here with me and I made you a promise for the end of all this, didn't I?"

He asks you seriously and expectantly.

"But now the least you can do is to understand me and give me peace, whether you like what I have to do or not," he makes it clear in a threatening tone, "And what I must do now Y/N, for the good of the Realm and to secure my brother's Throne, is to keep Alys on my side because I need her and I need her very much."

This last is completely etched in your mind, watching it attentively, your lips half open and the first tear falling down your cheek, under the attentive and annoying gaze of Aemond, who in spite of this does not care and turns away to continue undressing.

Then the other tears run down both of your cheeks, feeling more intense that sharp pain in your chest, hurting you completely by his insensitivity and how even though you know he is sleeping with another woman, he still doesn't care about you.

When has Aemond ever needed you the way he has told you he needs her?

Never.

You thought that bringing you here with him was his way of telling you that he needs you, but now that you have to share him with another woman and he apparently doesn't care about your feelings, you think it was all a bad idea.

You swallow the tight lump in your throat and clear your tears as you avoid completely breaking down by being in the same place as him.

"Perhaps I should go back to King's Landing," you say amidst the silence and tense atmosphere, avoiding hearing yourself as broken as you really are, "Perhaps I should talk to my father, apologize and do my duty by getting married."

Again Aemond lets out an unfunny and completely incredulous laugh, again turning to watch you but with the difference that he is actually watching you slightly amused and expectantly at the same time.

"Don't tell me, Y/N."

He watches you intently.

"And who are you going to marry, hmm? Or rather who or who will want to marry you?"

He asks you still amused.

"Haven't you thought that I've already ruined you for any other man by the simple fact of having brought you here with me? Haven't you thought that with that alone people can assume an intimate relationship between the two of us? Although it's not really an assumption, it's a fact, isn't it? For a long time now."

Tears again steadily stream down your cheeks, watching him with all the pain in your gaze, as he again averts his gaze from yours and again shakes his head in disbelief.

And you know he's right.

But you don't think it's fair that he can get annoyed with you when you call the attention of other men, but you are in a much worse position, he doesn't care how you feel because he is the man, he is the prince and you must understand him.

So it doesn't matter that he can have as many women as he wants at his disposal, in any way, while you should be reserved only for him.

"Stop crying," he tells you cold and serious, without looking at you, "If you feel so bad for Alys, understand that this is just for the moment, it will all be over when I win the war, so stop this foolishness."

And there it is again… his insensitivity.

And after that… everything changes.

That night Aemond again doesn't try to touch you or hug you during his sleep, nor is it as if you would want him to, considering that he had probably been in her company before.

That is why now knowing that Aemond warms her bed, you no longer desire his touch or even his presence.

And not only because of that, but also because of the way he had made you feel with his cruel behavior and with his cruel words, and that painful feeling just won't go away, not even him realizing how much he did and does hurt you.

Fortunately you continue not seeing him very often, in all that time just locked in your chamber, not even having the courage to talk and enjoy the company of the maids as usual, wanting to be alone all the time, going back to your days of having no appetite and no mood for anything.

If Aemond notices, he doesn't say anything to you or do anything about it, just watches you intently every time he appears in the chamber, where you just greet him and nothing else, not really giving him attention like before, your whole gaze dull, empty, disinterested and sad.

You can smell a strong scent, like citrus and a bit sweet at the same time on his clothes sometimes when he comes to the chamber very late at night, certainly belonging to her and of course he must not even notice it.

And not only that, cautiously you can see some marks on his neck and chest as he begins to undress, to which you lie on the bed with your back to him and completely covering yourself with the sheets, letting a few tears fall without him seeing you and without making a sound until you fall asleep.

Now all you think of when you see him is him in the company of his witch, receiving everything she offers him, her visions and letting him know everything he wants to know, in exchange for sleeping with her.

It is not until days later that he slowly begins to approach you again to caress and touch you.

At first you didn't let him turn your back to him and he started to caress you by putting his arm across your stomach, trying to pull you closer to him.

But when you stayed completely still and with your eyes full of tears, he felt the tension all over your body and at the end he let out a long sigh and stopped touching you, resigning himself.

You didn't understand why he needed that from you when he certainly always gets that from her.

That went on for a few more weeks, until Aemond was beginning to lose patience with not being able to have you that he finally lost it completely.

And you had to give in to pleasing him, letting him make you his after a considerable time. However, he was no longer making you feel anything.

Just the thought that he had previously been inside her and now he's inside you looking like he can't get enough… it was too much.

Aemond doesn't notice your lack of disinterest as he begins to fuck you, nor does he notice how your heart breaks into pieces. And it's not until you stop being responsive to his touch that he's finally disconcerted.

Without feeling your juices that made penetration easier, he gasps and lifts his gaze to you, peeling his face from your neck, watching you intently and curiously, still entering you continuously.

"What is it, my lady? Doesn't it feel good?"

You don't answer.

You don't even look him in the eye.

At this, Aemond kisses you with need, moving in and out of you faster, needing your response, for you to feel the same as he does, as before.

But it doesn't feel good, not good at all.

After that night, unable to stand being cooped up in your chamber any longer for the whole day, you decide to go out into the hallways and eventually end up in the kitchens to offer your hands to the maids for whatever it is they need.

You can't even stand your loneliness anymore, so you finally enjoy the company of the maids and help out as needed, even taking your meals with them and even returning at night to the chamber, almost at the same time as Aemond.

Surprisingly, he notices this and questions you about doing maid duties as well, telling you that you have no need, to which you without much emotion tell him that it's all right, that you like to help, not to say anything else to him and clearly not to give more importance to the matter.

In those moments is when he starts to get tired of your behavior, when the truth is that even he doesn't understand himself.

Before it bothered him that you cared too much about him and that you questioned absolutely everything, but now that you have stopped doing it, it also bothers him your lack of interest in him when before you were always there at his disposal, also bothering him your cold behavior.

But it bothers him more that you don't even respond to him anymore when he makes you his.

However, he knows he can't blame you for her, for Alys, because you know what he is doing with her in the darkness of her chamber in exchange for what.

But it still bothers him.

Fortunately for you, he decides to give you time and not force you into anything again if you don't want him to, to which you could only feel relieved, although you still have to endure how he hugs you during his sleep but nothing more.

It is not until one night that you return to your chamber later than usual, since you lost track of time and were all the time in the company of the maids, that you think that Aemond must probably still be attending to his duties or that he must already be asleep… or that he must be in the company of his witch.

The latter is what you believe the most, not surprisingly. In the end, however, it does surprise you.

About to open the door to your room, you don't have to, as it opens on the other side and you find yourself face to face with a woman with pale skin, huge green eyes, long black hair and wearing a robe around her body, holding it with one of her hands.

Your eyes widen and you freeze completely, as she stares back at you with such intensity that it almost brings you to tears, but in the end it is not that, but the realization of what has happened here, in your chamber, which is in fact more yours than Aemond's.

You then watch behind her, where Aemond instantly watches you with an expression you can't really read, as he finishes buttoning his belt, with his entire torso naked and the clear marks on his neck.

Again… you feel that sharp pain in your chest, the sadness and humiliation hitting you hard, with your tears starting to want to spill out of your eyes and run down your cheeks, watching him with the most hurt look of all.

How could he dare?

You don't even expect anything else, you just run away from there, tears streaming down your cheeks instantly, as you hear Aemond say your name, quickly coming after you.

But you don't look back, not even wanting to look him in the eye, having no idea where you're really heading, but not in your greatest madness are you ever going to lie in that bed again, not even he having any respect for you in that regard.

Still Aemond is quicker and manages to catch up to you, grabbing you hard by your arm, demanding you to stop and watch him, pulling you closer to his body, to which you put up resistance and crying you try with all your might to get him to let go of you to get away from him, but he won't let you.

"Y/N! Look at me!"

You can't.

You don't want to.

He irritated, grabs you firmly with both hands, reluctantly stopping you, while you continue to cry and feel completely weak, everything about him, his grip on you when he had touched her on your bed before and that scent of hers also impregnated in him… it's too much.

"Let go of me."

You say pleadingly, sobbing, trying to pull away from him.

"Stop fucking acting like this!" he exclaims to you in annoyance.

You deny with your head.

"H-how could you?"

"Look at me," he demands.

"No! Let go of me!" you resist again, very hurt and very humiliated.

"I said look at me!"

He exclaims to you angrily, grabbing your face with both of his hands and making you look at him in a firm and demanding manner, his grip strong.

At this you stand completely still, but still crying and sobbing, trying to control yourself, but you cannot.

Thinking about it, about her and him already hurt you enough, but now having seen it… you can't stand it, as well as his touch now on you, finding it unpleasant.

And when you finally open your eyes and dare to look at him again, he is worried about noticing all that pain, rejection and displeasure.

However, he doesn't allow it and continues to hold you in that firm manner.

"Listen to me," he says seriously and firmly, "This was the last time, the last one."

You put up a resistance again, not believing his words at all, looking absurd in the midst of all your pain.

"Y/N!" he exclaims stopping you again, looking at you as honestly as possible, " It has been the last time, truly," he insists, "I promise."

You say nothing to him, just continue to cry almost silently, as he promises and assures you over and over again, wanting to reassure you, when the truth is you don't even believe him, so you make him believe that you do, to which he finally lets go of you.

"Go back to the chamber and wait there for me, she's gone," he tells you softly, but still firm and demanding.

And you are surprised how he dares in ordering you such a thing, while you just nod so you can finally get away from him and feeling relieved you do so, definitely not going back to that room, at all.

You find another empty chamber where you lie down on the bed right there and continue to let the tears flow freely from your eyes, trying to calm down little by little, feeling so lonely, so silly and as if you mean nothing.

It is not until after Aemond finishes talking to Alys and returns to the chamber expecting to find you there, but nothing.

He lets out a long breath, frustrated, only to later ask his guards where you've gone to find you in another chamber, completely balled up, asleep and with dried tears on your cheeks, your whole face suffering.

He lets out another long breath, running a hand through his face and hair, shuffling it in frustration, that he decides not to do anything else, just leave you alone to sleep, that being the least he can do for you after witnessing such a thing taking advantage of your absence.

Severe days has passed since that breaking point between you and Aemond, where neither of you have spoken about it.

He tried, of course, to explain to you so that he could properly ask for your forgiveness, but you never let him, not wanting or needing to hear anything from him, still too hurt and too humiliated to bear such thing.

Since then, you now sleep in that new chamber, this not being to Aemond's liking at first.

But acting so cold to him, not even being able to look him in the eye when he spoke to you and making you so tense in his presence, he understood that he could not force you to sleep with him if you did not wish to do so.

Aemond hated every moment when he did not wake up with you by his side, also when he could not touch you and make you his, or have the maids assist him in absolutely everything, when before it was only you.

If he kept his promise not to have any more meetings with Alys, you were no longer interested in knowing, only focusing on you and sometimes on him when he asked you for something, but always with that cold and indifferent behavior.

When the time of battle comes again.

He and his entire army prepares to march to a point where Alys had told him before that it would be where an army fighting for his half-sister would be and that is approaching Harrenhal.

Aemond awaits the return of Sr. Criston with a small but efficient army that he prepared for him by sending him and those men to the nearest house settlements of Harrenhal to demand that they bend the knee for his brother Aegon.

Once he returns with those men, they can finish preparing and stop that army of Rhaenyra's, having him more opportunity to protect his entire army from the skies and burn as much as he can.

You along with some maids provide food to the men who will go to battle, you also help with their supplies, walking back and forth under the watchful eye of Aemond being so helpful to his men, this not pleasing him but not being able to do anything about it either.

When an ambush happens.

Everything happens too fast, as suddenly a not very big army surrounds all of Aemond's surprisingly with black flags, symbol of Rhaenyra.

And then a man grabs you by force, takes you to the center of the whole ambush and then puts a dagger in your neck.

[bonny-kookoo]

the 'I like you' couple is soo cute 💖💗💓❤️ but now we need to know! 🥺 does jungkook find a nickname for her? does he really think about it? does he try out a few before deciding which one he likes? or does she does or likes something random or particular and he gets the nickname from teasing her? or he just has a light bulb moment on a random moment? lol, I love them, can't get enough!!

A/N: Masterlist

"Baaaaaby-kookoo-love-of-my-life-" you whine, and he squints his eyes as he walks into his bedroom where you're laying on your back. "My tummy hurts." You complain, and he sits down on the edge of his bed next to you to take of his socks.

"...okay?" He wonders, and you kick him with your foot a little.

"Make it better." You demand, and he chuckles.

"How?" He wonders, and you scoff.

"The fuck do I know!" You huff. "Like, I don't know, talk to it? Maybe it'll get intimidated if you're all angry with it." You offer as a solution, and to your surprise, he turns around and points an accusing finger at your lower stomach.

"You better stop fucking hurting right now because I want to go sleep and God knows my spoiled princess won't shut up until you're quiet.!" He threatens at your body, before he turns around and closes the opened window before turning off the lights as he crawls into bed next to you.

It's quiet for a moment, until you speak.

"I'm both mildly turned on and offended right now." You say, and he snorts a laugh, hand patting over the blankets to find yours to hold in the dark. "Spoiled princess? Really?" You scoff.

"You are one." He defends himself.

"I mean, a princess? Hell fucking yes, and you better start carrying me around as one from now on, prince charming!" You laugh, and he rolls his eyes in the dark.

"You're spoiled enough." He says, closing his eyes.

"So?" You ask, before a slap is heard.

And its quiet.

For a good moment.

"Did you just slap my ass?!" You yell out, sitting up, and he laughs whole heartedly.

"Was it? I couldn't tell." He laughs.

"Oh so you just blindly aimed to smack me and ACCIDENTALLY hit my ass? Fucking lying piece of shit, you knew exactly what you-"

"Do I need to spank you again, or are you gonna be a good girl and sleep?" He asks. "You've got work at 6 am, and I need to be up at 5:30." He reminds you, and you suddenly fall back into the pillows, scooting closer, closer, until you're full on clinging onto him.

"...jungkookie..?" You ask quietly, awfully shy. He hums a reply. "Can you say it again?" You ask.

"You have work tomorrow-"

"Nooo, that part before that? Like, I did what you said so I'm aaaaaa~?" You draw out the last syllable, wiggling your toes as you wait, and he suddenly chuckles.

"Good Girl." He says, and you squeal to yourself, cuddling up to him.

It's the first time he's ever really comfortable saying things like that- and maybe it's the way you've gotten closer by now, not only emotionally. Yesterday he'd been so lost in kissing you that he didn't even notice you getting so riled up on his lap- and it left him both excited and terrified.

And these days, he's been trying out some petnames for you here and there to see what would stick.

Babe or baby are cute when you say it, but they feel way too boring to him. They're too basic, nothing special, and it just doesn't feel right.

Until you're out at a shopping center, randomly spending a day at the mall together when you spot something in a kid's store window. "Oh- did you know I always wanted to be a princess for Halloween?" You say, spooning up some icecream from your cup. "But my dad never bought me the costume, and we never went trick-or-treat-ing." You pout, making Jungkook smile as he tucks in a strand of hair that had escaped your messy bun on your head.

"Well, you're a princess to me now, no need for a costume." He shrugs. "And I even buy you candy, so you don't have to knock on stranger's doors either." He jokes, and you look up at him at that, pulling him down by the neckline of his shirt to peck his lips. "Huh?" He wonders, and you just smile.

"You're just so dreamy." You sigh dramatically. "Your flirting is getting a bit out of hand though. Makes me feel all fluffy and horny." You boldly admit, making him laugh as he shakes his head, taking your empty cup from you to throw it away in a bin nearby. "Ah, such a prince charming!" You giggle, and he takes your hand In his at that, kissing the back of it for a second.

Successfully making you blush for the first time since he's met you.

And he's starting to really enjoy making you flustered.

[pandemoniumonwheels]

I have a crazy theory about episode 7 of The Wheel of Time, but I need it to cope. Feel free to cope with me. Feel free to discard that too.

It was all Siuan's quick thinking and her masterplan. And Verin didn't lie.

To start we need to separate all Moiraine - Siuan meetings. There were three.

The first one, the cold one.

Moiraine demands answers and gets none. Siuan is visibly angry, but also worried. She outright calls Moiraine's stilling a violation. She is aware how hard it is, how dangerous, how difficult to survive. And she loves Moiraine, we know she does, she worries about her. She also has to check if Moiraine can continue their mission. At the same time she can't speak too freely, they're in Cairhien, the chances of someone listening to them are higher than chances of people not eavesropping on them. She needs to be careful. What Siuan says is: "The Tower's laws have stood for 3,000 years, it's time we obeyed them." She is quite vague about the laws she refers to. And she doesn't lie, they stood for 3000 years and every time is the time to obey them. According to the law. Moreover, it's a clear parallel to season 1, episode 6 Moiraine's words: "When have we ever followed the rules?" Since when Siuan who took a marriage vow in front of the whole chamber of Aes Sedai gives a damn about Tower's laws? Why would Siuan suddenly care? Well, she doesn't, it's just a phrase only Moiraine would understand, a code in case someone is listening. This scene is also the only one we see them being close, showing affection (Siuan's hand on Moiraine's cheek? I almost hear "pufferfish" in the way Moiraine relaxes). It's another sign to Moiraine, the non-verbal communication of Siuan's real intent. Then it fades to black. We don't really know what happened between them later. Siuan also talks about rowing together. Keep that in mind, because all that she does next contradicts that statement at the first glance.

The second scene - Rand

Siuan talks with Rand, a very weird conversation. Just a few seconds earlier we saw Lan reassuring Rand that Siuan is not a typical Aes Sedai. And what is Siuan doing? Talking about caging him. But also, she doesn't say she is planning to do it to him. Only that Tower laws require it. The idea is to have Rand as a warrior, not general. But Siuan never says it is hers idea. She shows him how powerless he is. Stresses how he needs to learn. How caging him would help with that? And then Moiraine comes in. Why? To be told (in front of Rand) how incompetent she is? Only to lock them later together, because why not suddenly imprison a banished Aes Sedai with the Dragon Reborn. It doesn't make sense. Unless it's a show created to convince Rand to trust Moiraine. Rand is afraid of the Tower, rightly so. He keeps pushing Moiraine away afraid she is trying to manipulate him, make him follow the path created for him by the White Tower, put a leash on him. Moiraine can't guide him if he sees her as an agent of the power he fears. That's why Siuan becomes exactly that - the White Tower Rand doesn't trust, an Aes Sedai carrying more about forcing him to obey rather than reaching his full potential, an image he hates. On the other side is Moiraine, taking his side, arguing with imprisonment. In comparison, she is extremely trustworthy. And it works. Rand finally confides in her, shares his plans, his brilliant idea of bringing Lanfear to the city(/s). That's when Moiraine's and Siuan's plan fails, one of the Forsaken is not something they wanted, but we'll get to it.

Bonus - Verin 007

We all assume that Verin lied because that's what Moiraine suggested. But did she really? Moiraine decided to trust her to some extent. Why wouldn't Siuan? The phrasing of the "order" was very careful, but maybe not because it was a lie, but as an attempt to allow Siuan to deny such order without suspicion. And to keep the pretence in front of Rand. It worked again.

The third meeting - the pain

It all went perfectly. The Dragon trusts Moiraine and takes her with him (finally) instead of running from her. Siuan is ready to proclaim him. She doesn't need him to do so. Him fulfilling the prophecy in Falme will only make her words more believable. Verin helped them escape, no one can trace this ploy back to Siuan. There is, however, one factor they couldn't expect. Lanfear. Maybe her appearing changed Siuan's mind about letting Rand go? More likely she just Aes Selies about some boy and runs after Moiraine. And magically she finds her without any issue in front of the Waygate. How? Only Verin knew where the Waygate was, and where Moiraine would take Rand. You know where I'm going with it, right? So we get to the closing of the Waygate. Because suddenly it wasn't only about convincing Rand. They had to deal with one more, unexpected guest, and they didn't have time to discuss any tactics. Siuan had to make sure Lanfear didn't see Moiraine as a threat. She would never allow Rand to keep close someone who is working for the White Tower. The risk would be too great. Someone cast away, alone, someone who just lost their love, whose grief might be just enough to turn them to the Dark is, however, a very different thing. Siuan had to create a scene which could convince the very mistress of the dream world that Siuan and Moiraine do not work together anymore, and that Moiraine is no threat to Lanfear's plans. There was no time for planning, no time for explaining, for games. Lanfear was getting closer with every second and they wasted some of the precious time on "you lied to me" part. Side note, I do think Siuan actually believed she was lied to, and her shock was real. So was Moiraine's reassurance. But that's when Siuan came up with a way they could fool Lanfear. All she needed was Moiraine looking utterly broken and betrayed. And there was one way she could achieve that easily. By violating Moiraine more than even Ishamael did, by taking control over her in the most violent of ways, by making herself a villain. So she did. She used the only thing Moiraine never suspected could be used against her by Siuan - their love, their devotion, their secret, sweet, forbidden dream. Siuan broke both of their hearts. And when Lanfear came all she saw was shattered pieces of their love. For her that was what made her turn to the Dark, what's more convincing than a lost loved for Lanfear? Before she could think for too long, see through it, or before Moiraine could do anything, ask questions Siuan would not be able to answer, Siuan attacked. Possibly expecting that's the last thing she would do in her life. And it worked again. Lanfear let Moiraine live. Lanfear took Moiraine with her and Rand.

Siuan made herself a villain in front of Rand. And a betrayer in the eyes of Lanfear. She took that burden from Moiraine, so Moiraine could focus on helping Rand. She used every resource she had, she gave up everything she had. Because Moiraine isn't the only one that knows the right thing to do, no matter how hard that is. And her last plea was for forgiveness and nad of hope that Moiraine understands and continues their mission. As Moiraine herself said, guiding, protecting Rand is more important than Lan. It's more important than her. It's more important than any love. It was Siuan's time to give up everything to the cause. Just like Moiraine did at the Eye of the World.

__________

And it was longer than I expected. I think I will be adding more analysis to the certain scenes, words and looks. Because as I said, I do cope hard.

[paperbag34]

Hazbin Hotel roleswap au concept? maybe?

Got bored, started thinking about "What if Alastor found Vaggie instead of Charlie", snowballed a little from there.

_______________________

Edit: an expansion: How Deals Work

_______________________

What's swapped in this AU:

For now, only Alastor and Charlie.

Alastor remains largely unchanged. He's still the Radio Demon, the terrifying overlord with a meteoric rise to prominence after killing multiple century-old overlords and broadcasting their screams, then disappeared after a fight with the TV Demon, Vox.

But, now after seven years of. well. Radio silence (lol). His radio has begun broadcasting once more. And unexpectedly, what the voice on the radio speaks of is not the brutal murder of Overlords, but instead, a pet project of his. The Hazbin Hotel, an establishment accepting all, and under his protection, with its insane goal of redeeming sinners.

No one really knows what made the Radio Demon take on such an impossible, foolish task, thuogh speculation is abound. Vox, in particular, likes to ridicule Alastor on his shows to the point where it's a bit of a running gag for his viewers. No one knows anything, except that these days, the Radio Demon is often seen around a winged cat, and an odd, gray-skinned girl.

Charlie, on the other hand, is the Princess Of Hell. To the common sinner, not much is known about her. She's more of an abstract presence since her role has her with responsibilities that don't et her get out as much. What is known is that sometimes appears after an Extermination, you can catch a glimpse of the third-most powerful demon in Hell looking around the devastated circles, cataloging the destruction.

While it's unknown how much of Hell's ruling she actually does, most of the things she attaches her name to have to do with the Extermination, or more accurately, the aftermath. Ways for sinners to get back on their feet after the exterminators pop in and trash shit, for example. Most of the Overlords don't really like having to do this, but even the greatest detractor puts the programs in place with some level of competence, after how the last Overlord to disobey her rules was... Punished.

______________________________________________________________

So, why the change of heart? Why would Alastor suddenly decide to try to redeem sinners? In a word: Vaggie.

During that particular Extermination Day, Vaggie crawls in an alley, injured and in pain. Lute left her alive, but her eye will never grow back, and she left her torn-off wings to rot in a trashcan a few steps away. Leaning against a dumpster, she decides she needs to rest.

Normally, she'd be afraid of sinners finding her, but she knows from the few of her former colleagues that she's talked to that were trapped in Hell after the Extermination ended and had to be extracted, that Sinners actually have a bit of a grace period after an Extermination, where violence is at an all time low. (She doesn't know this, but this is actually a decree by the Princess of Hell).

As she begins to drift off, however, a shadow falls over her. In canon, this would be Charlie, deciding to help what she thinks is a demon lucky enough to escape the Extermination with only a missing eye for it.

Here, though, the responsibilities of the Princess keep Charlie in her office, working and unable to go see what's been happening with the devastation. Here, her eyes snap open as she senses the aura of an Overlord, and right before everything goes dark, she realizes with horror, that whoever this demon is, he knows she's an Exorcist.

_________

When she awakes, she's tied to a table, restrained by dark tentacles that radiate demonic power in a room lit by a single bulb. The demon from before walks in, introducing himself as Alastor, and he asks for her name.

Naturally, she ignores him, instead demanding to know what he wants. She considers threatening him that she could call Exorcists down to extract her, but she knows that she's considered a traitor, and it'd never work. For some reason, the demon acquesious, and he explains that he's curious what exactly managed to harm an Exorcist so badly.

As an Overlord, he's seen and even fought off Exorcists before, and he's seen what happens when a demon harms one. They get back up. Tear an limb off and they regenerate, punch a hole through their chest and they'll be down for a while, but it'll close and they'll keep going. Suffocate one and given time, they'll start to breathe again. Even the more thorough methods of disposal simply result in the Exorcist turning into golden light and reconstituting themself or flying back to Heaven.

So, four years into his "sabbatical", when he followed the scent of an unfamiliar type of blood to the sight of an Exorcist missing their wings and an eye, he was naturally very interested. Knowing what, exactly managed to permanently harm an Exorcist is invaluable knowledge for an Overlord, after all, even though he's on a sort of sabbatical.

He threatens torture if she doesn't tell him how to kill an angel, even proposing a Deal where he won't use the knowledge against her (as long as she doesn't attack him) if she tells him. It's his turn to be surprised, however, when she just laughs, rejecting his deal only to just tell him the answer: the only thing that can harm an angel permanently is angelic power. He couldn't kill her even if she wanted him to, and with the guilt she's feeling and the pain she's in, she actually kind of wants to die.

Alastor, after some prodding, gets her to spill her story, and sensing opportunity, offers another Deal; for her to work under him in exchange for his protection, or if not, she can just leave, and he'll let her go. Demons gain power from having Deals, after all, and having one with an Angel is far too tempting.

Vaggie, believing that this is the best option she has, and that she'd probably not have to do that much more than what she'd have to even if she struck out on her own, accepts the Deal.

_________

Two years later, the two have formed a sort of "friendship?"with each other. It helps that despite Alastor being Alastor, with all the cruelty that implies, since Alastor's basically decided to disappear from politics, he has no real need for any sort of "enforcer" role for Vaggie, and she's more of an assistant than anything. She's also friends with Husk, having bonded over the collective experience of Alastor having them in a Deal, though it is strained at times since Vaggie's Deal is so much more lenient while Alastor owns Husk's soul.

It also helps that Alastor did defend her during Extermination days whenever some Exorcists tried to attack them. He doesn't want to lose his Deal with an Angel, after all!

Eventually, the topic of what goes on in Heaven when they're not down in Hell exterminating demons comes up between Vaggie and Alastor. It's all well and good until Vaggie mentions a woman she knows, and how she talks about her beloved son, and Alastor freezes. That woman? It's his mother. After some talking, Alastor tells her that his only real regret to what he's done (being a serial killer) is that his mother would be heartbroken that he'd turned out like that.

The conversation eventually turns to if Alastor could do someting she'd be proud of now, and, well. He's in Hell, there's not much he can think of right now that'd have the large impact he would want it to have. And honestly, while it does eat at him, he's had decades to make his peace with the fact that his mother would be severely disappointed in him now.

But the idea of doing something that'd make his mother proud stays with him. And eventually, after a conversation with Vaggie he comes up with the idea of redeeming sinners.

And so, one year later, Alastor's radio comes back up, and sinners start hearing of the Hazbin Hotel.

[star-girl69]

My Heart Never Knows

a/n: ok just to clarify- the confession last chapter was mostly just for jake and neytiri to say that they're both ok with this and that it is an option they're willing to explore. but please keep in mind they have not know reader long and basically they're trying to figure out what they want while flirting w reader at the same time. it's a mess but they're cute so!!

and this chapter kinda sucks… i’m still figuring out where i want this story to go but i hope you all enjoy!!

warnings: mentions of fighting, swearing, tell me if i missed anything!!

Chapter Five - Breathe

—-

"Why are you dressed up?"

Ronal looks at you oddly as you enter their mauri, the sun still rising behind you. You pause in the entrance, placing your hands on your hips, feeling like a fool.

"I am not."

“You are." she shoots back, before a smile finds its way onto her face. "Have you met someone?"

“No!" you blurt out, far too quickly, and she only smiles wider.

"You have," she insists, walking over to you and touching one of the green jewels on your woven top, reaching up your neck, falling just to your ribs.

You shake your head adamantly, explanations spilling from your lips, but she only shakes her head.

"No. You must tell me, Y/N," she pushes some of your hair over your shoulder, knuckles brushing your skin.

"I haven't.” You repeat, trying to sound unbendable, truthful. She cannot question you, and you cannot question yourself.

“Fine. Do not tell me. I understand new love... and it is nice for it to be just the two of you,” you have never known Ronal to give up easy, and she scoffs at your unimpressed look. "I speak the truth." she says, before smiling at you once more and turning her back to you.

While you eye her, suspicious that she will suddenly turn around with demands on her lips, you do think about her words.

Have you met someone?

—-

When you wind down the woven paths, no mothers pull their children away. A few passersby even smile at you, and you return the gesture, eager to distract yourself from your thoughts.

Have you met someone?

The words ring in your head like a prayer, but instead of making you feel connected to Eywa and fulfilled, you feel like you are being torn in two.

Your feet take you to their mauri of their own accord, you body betraying you and already used to your new routine.

When you came around the bend, you saw them, standing and talking. Your eyes flicked to the blue water next to you. You could jump in right now, swim out to the seawall and live in Three Brothers Rock forever.

Instead, you keep walking. If only because no matter your heart, you promised Tonowari, and it would break you to not keep your promise.

You had decided late last night that you would take them in the water today. They have swam before, but not with the breathing techniques you had taught them. Besides, if Jake was so insistent on riding a tsurak, he needs to get used to the water.

But while the path bounces and wanes and waxes beneath you, you cannot help but feel that this morning is different.

Maybe it is the change of plans. Maybe it is the fact that you are wearing your nicest top, for reasons unknown to you.

Instead, you ignore it, because you have a duty to fulfill.

When Neytiri sees you, she smiles brightly, and you resist the urge to pull away. Neytiri is kind and beautiful, but not the type to smile at you the way she is now.

Then, Jake turns, and you see him do a double take.

You resist the urge to look down, wondering if perhaps you top is crooked, or your bottoms have shifted over. But you feel the fabric, the twine against you, and it is in all the right places.

But as soon as it is there, it is gone.

"Good morning," you say, hoping your smile does not reveal the storm underneath that is you.

"Good morning. Y/N,” Neytiri says, stepping out in front of Jake. Her eyes trail up and down, and while it still makes that ache under your ribs flare, you have grown used to her encompassing, wandering looks.

"You look fancy," Jake blurts, almost as if he has to say it before it burns him up inside. But when you look back towards him, he is only confidence. Thoughts swirl- did he mean to say it? Did he want to? Does he know what it does to you? “I like the green things. Pretty."

Suddenly the floor seems very interesting. Anything to get away from his burning eyes, like he is looking into your soul, your heart, under your ribs. “Thank you,”

You wish Eywa would appear in front of you, press your face in her hands, command you to be well, a little less of the mess you seem to become around them.

You feel stupid and small. The urge to wrap your heart in layers and layers of cloth and flesh, protect it from this strange man and woman who you refuse to believe what you feel about them.

“Would you like to swim?”

A wide smile crosses Jake’s face.

Even if you do humor the possibility that you see a future with them, they would never like you. Never want to mate with you. Not you.

“Hell yeah,”

Have you met someone?

When you walk past them, dive into the sea, the ache under your ribs hurts the most it ever has.

—-

You hear splashes behind you, and you feel the disturbance in the still water, the currents pushing at you.

You try ignore it, instead diving deeper and deeper, trying to escape their current, until you get to the bottom and can hide yourself in the coral, bury yourself instead.

But you don’t do that. You have a duty. Instead, you turn towards them, watch Neytiri’s eyes fix on a small fish swimming past, and she reaches out to touch it as it swims away.

Her hand raised, she watches as the small creature carves a path for itself, and you watch her.

When you tear your eyes away from her, you go out farther and Jake follows, Neytiri slowly trailing behind.

When you move your hands, Jake squints for a second, and you almost smile. But he recognizes it, one of the first words you had taught the two of them in Metkayina sign language, in your hand-words, as Jake said.

Breathe, you say, and-

He starts to breathe.

—-

Two Weeks Later

It is much easier to live in the moment, you have decided.

The label “friends” is precarious when placed on the three of you- you, Jake, and Neytiri- but the more you think about it the more your ribs ache and your head starts to hurt.

You have decided to let yourself float, enjoy their attention, their company. They are still cautious around others, but you think they have let you in, if just ever so slightly. They like you and you like them, and it does not have to be anything more than that.

You had dinner with them once, where Lo’ak spent most of the time trying to subtly ask questions about Tsireya, and you found that you got along well with all of their children.

Later, when Neytiri was handing you a shawl to walk home- she had insisted, saying you could return it when you saw her again- you confided in her that you had been nervous.

She had just smiled and told you, “They loved you. We all do.”

And when you look at her now, your mind flicks back to that moment.

Not thinking about what it means, for you, for the clan, for them, but instead just basking in the feeling of being wanted.

Neytiri has taken your place, assisting Ronal in her day to day tasks as the Tsahìk, and there is really no use for you anymore. But Ronal doesn’t trust Neytiri, not like she trusts you, so she still wants you to come.

And she is your sister, so why would you refuse her?

Now, Neytiri sits next to you, helping you wrap a man’s leg, cut open in a hunting accident. Ronal makes a tea on the far side of the room- too far for her to hear you two.

The man you tend to is delirious from the pain, but you can’t bring yourself to speak.

It is too nice to just be here with her, to sit next to her, to feel your knees touch so slightly. Your skin burns where it touches hers, but you don’t move.

Would it matter if you burned, as long as you burned with her?

—-

“Jake! Jake!” when you call, you almost expect him to ignore you. But he turns, almost immediately, walking towards you.

He is a force, cutting through the people on the walkways, because he commands a room. His song is one of violence, and he is walking towards you, fists clenched, dark look in his eyes.

It is only a few steps, but it feels like a lifetime until he is in front of you. Scars line is chest like a spiderweb, and you want to reach out and trace each one with your fingers, your tongue-

“I- I didn’t think you would-” you say, flustered, surprised that he actually gave you the time of day.

His face drops. “I’m sorry, ‘M just-”

He curses under his breath, fists clenching, and is it so wrong for you to grab his hand? Because you do, pull his fingers out, unfurl them like a flower.

He stares down at your intwined hands for a second, the back of his palm resting in the bowl of yours, your other hand wrapped around his fingers. It is just basic biology- his hands are bigger than yours, but you find that you quite like it.

“I heard what happened,” you whisper, staring at him, but his eyes are still downcast. “I’m sorry that Ao’nung said that to Kiri, did that to your boys.”

“It’s alright,” he murmurs, shaking his head, and when he looks up it is your turn to look down.

“You are not your children, and I am not my nephew. But, I- we are okay, right?”

“What?”

And the disbelief in his voice makes you look up, makes you stare him right in the eyes and you are pinned under him and your ribs ache and it is not enough, you think, not enough not enough-

“We- we are okay?”

He smiles, and you are standing on a cliff and he is below and you are falling, falling, doing everything you said you were not.

“Why wouldn’t we be okay? We are. Okay, I mean. I can’t blame you for the actions of someone else.”

And you cannot bring yourself to answer, because you don’t know what you would do if the three of you were not okay. You let go of him and nod, swear his face drops, and say you will see him tomorrow.

You are sinking underneath their waves, and you know you should be dying, drowning and falling and sinking. But you still breathe.

You do not- cannot- think about why that is.

—-

taglist:

@sully-stick-together @corrupt-cadaver420 @jadynchronicle @imthefunniestpersonalive @fangil101 @mashiromochi @rey26 @soothinghummerz @myheartfollower @pwallettes @melodykisses @ghoulfiendz @fanboyluvr @itsyaspwr @khaleesihavilliard @capbrie @nothingfuninthislife @faceaeter @thetrashindrakensroom @makeup-stuff-and-such @my-dearest-agent @miyamuraaaa @ex0ticnobody @xoxovienna

[runespoor7]

For the ask meme, au where wwx kills lxc at qiangpi path instead of jzx.

Or gender swap jc au.

Ok, so it took me a while to think this over, because there’s a lot here, and then talking it over with @demoiselledefortune I realized there’s even more than I thought! (still thinking about the genderswap jc one)

Also, poor, poor LWJ. 🙁 (LQR doesn't bear thinking about. That poor, poor man. I don't talk about LQR under the cut because it's too sad for me to contemplate.)

1) So the thing is, this isn’t a noticeably better accidental killing for WWX, because while the Lans may be less the powerhouse than the Jins, JGS will definitely try and use LXC’s death to turn against WWX. And it’s going to be stupidly easy, because LXC was a sect leader and the sworn brother of his son.

(I assume LXC was there because he was invited to JL’s 100 days ceremony and his passing there was a coincidence, while in canon he was already at Jinlintai. So maybe JZX is still in Jinlintai here, the confrontation happening earlier and thus before JZX departed; or JZX is here as well as he was in canon, and LXC was the one running late - in which case, JZX is alive and a witness and might speak up on WWX’s behalf at least to his wife and his BIL, at least to tell them that it seemed an accident. This turns out not to have much of an impact on the grand scale of things OR on JYL and JC’s understanding of what happened, bc they already trust WWX so much, but it does have an impact on JZX’s view of the world and himself. This is less about WWX than it is about politics in general and his father in specific. In that version he’s much more in-the-middle of things, much more aware of being personally dismissed. In that version there’s a chance he and JYL go live in LP.)

Besides the Jins, there’s also NMJ, who is a big fan of his sworn brothers not getting killed and of not shielding people from the consequences of their actions. Just putting it out there where we can see it. On the other hand, they’re not LXC’s most direct family. LWJ and the Lans are, so NMJ lets LWJ take point.

(There's a version of this prompt where NMJ qi-deviates when he hears about LXC's death. In that timeline should WWX get killed NHS' plans never feature bringing him back.)

2) Know for whom LXC dying instead of JZX changes things a lot, though? WQ and WN. When they decide to surrender themselves, they go to Cloud Recesses, not Jinlintai. LWJ and his sect I feel wouldn't punish WQ for LXC’s death. She wasn't there.

(WN, otoh, is very done for. There is no way GSL pulls a Jin to keep him around. He's a fierce corpse and the one who killed their sect leader at that. They execute him/lay his soul to rest. There's no further desacration of WN and that's probably the bitterest comfort WQ could hope for. WQ does try to shield WN when she realizes the Lans aren't planning on executing her, but she doesn't get that.)

WQ would easily get a promise of safety from LWJ for at least A-Yuan, probably Granny, maybe the others - on the sterner end of the scale for the adult cultivators. This is somewhat dependent on what JGS (and NMJ) are clamoring for but JGS wants the Stygian Seal more than he does the Wens and NMJ would be satisfied with the Lans supervising the fate of the Wen remnants. Besides, the most high-profile of the Wen remnants is WQ and she just surrendered herself. WN would say WWX isn’t responsible for LXC’s death, it was a freak resentful energy accident–

3) I think what LWJ does demand about WWX is... that WWX be given over to Gusu Lan. They can lock him up. And purify him of the resentful energy.

LWJ is in a frankly abysmal mental space - it’s only because his cultivation is so orthodox that he doesn't qi deviate. It’s all tearing him up, LXC’s death because of the guy LWJ has a crush on, LWJ’s want for WWX and LWJ’s wish that he could (imitate his father) bring someone back to CR and lock them up and LWJ suddenly being in the horrendous situation where he is imitating his father. The memory of the kiss is now a nightmare. It was always a mixed memory (how shameful, to lose control of himself thus - to take advantage of the one he loved - to lack even the courage to simply ask, either for the kiss, or at least for forgiveness) but now it makes him retch.

It's all twisted in the fact that LXC is dead, because of WWX. There can be nothing between LWJ and WWX now. Simply wishing there could be would be the worst betrayal.

(LWJ remembers the days of their youth, LXC’s delight and gentle teasing at LWJ’s inexplicable liking of WWX. The Water Abyss. And now LXC is dead, because of the boy he was so happy LWJ wanted for a friend. LXC always wanted LWJ to have friends, something akin to his own friendship with NMJ.)

0) (the Problem. The Problem is that I cannot see WWX staying in the Cloud Recesses if he's imprisoned there. If he wouldn't rather die at first, he will afterwards. LWJ thinks of his mother. If WWX dies LWJ would enter seclusion like his father once did. This isn’t something LWJ tells himself consciously.)

4) JC and JYL visit WWX in the Cloud Recesses while he's imprisoned there. JC hates LWJ for it, but I think he's self-aware enough to think “what if it had been Jiejie.” It’s hard to hate LWJ wholeheartedly.

5) WQ is in Cloud Recesses, too. She’ll never live outside the Cloud Recesses again, but it could have been far worse. She’s allowed time with A-Yuan (she is not in forced seclusion and neither is she A-Yuan’s mother but LWJ cannot let himself see them together, or else he starts to think of how she isn’t allowed to raise her kin herself.)

When it comes out *pretty damn early* that WWX doesn’t have a core, she’s the one who implies WZL got him.

(JC is in LWJ’s office clamoring, begging for WWX to be released into the care of YMJ in a hot minute after he finds out - which takes at least one or two visits, because no-one wrote to tell him, and it takes him asking a question about how getting WWX rid of resentful energy and not letting go when the answer’s too cagey to his taste for him to know. If it were just LWJ– but LWJ has elders. plus there’s also LXC’s sworn brothers to contend with; LWJ isn’t thinking of that, and JC will think of it later, after LWJ has refused to return WWX to YMJ.) JC is so so so angry at everyone involved - WWX for *lying to him*, why didn’t you *tell me*, I would have *helped* - WQ for hiding it from him AND not telling him when she told the Lans (to which she retorts that she isn’t exactly allowed a free correspondence. Hmph. Okay. JC allows that. WQ has negative scruples about lying to him about the core rn.) - LWJ for keeping WWX a prisoner here even though WWX is, is, WWX isn’t a cultivator anymore he’s a normal person let YMJ watch over him, let JC - even JYL for having something else in her life that she loves, that isn’t WWX locked up in another sect.

WQ is also the one who sees when WWX is seriously at risk of his life just fading away, and this time she tells JC: if WWX doesn’t get out, he will die.

The fic ends with WQ and JC breaking WWX out of the Cloud Recesses (it’s implied LWJ is looking the other way). WQ stays in CR, of course, but JC is taking WWX to Lotus Pier. There’s no plan for “later”.

[fanficshiddles]

Jealousy and Tricks, One Shot

Thank you for the prompt, toshisurtsdottir: Snape railing Toshi and Tom is somewhere in the background passively standing around so the one shot passes the requirements :)

I shoulda known you’d submit something like this! Haha! I’ve changed it quite a bit, since I know you just want the Toshi and Snape smut, so I came up with a diff idea around it and had a little fun.

Note/warnings: Hogwarts/Asgard AU thing. Jealousy. Un-accepted Voyeurism? I dunno how else to describe it. Basically, Severus and Toshi being watched unknowingly. *shrugs*

-

‘I think it’s ridiculous that Dumbledore has resolved to having idiotic gods in the school.’ Severus huffed as he and Toshi made their way down one of the halls.

‘I think it’s a good idea. If it helps keep the kids safe, we can continue on with our lessons without worry.’ Toshi shrugged. ‘Besides, that Loki one is quite hot.’

Severus raised an eyebrow and his head whipped round to face her. He opened his mouth but found he couldn’t say anything. He despised Toshi and she him. They got on each other’s nerves, she always bugged him while he was busy making potions, hanging around him and interfering. She was so infuriating…

Yet, he couldn’t help but have a bit of jealousy creep up inside him at the thought of her crushing on someone else…

Toshi noticed his reaction, she smirked to herself and flounced off into her classroom. Leaving Severus to continue on his way without her.

That evening during dinner, Severus was sitting in his usual place at the top table and he noticed Toshi speaking with that Loki at the side of the banquet hall. The way Toshi was blushing slightly and giggling, touching his arm where possible didn’t go unnoticed by Severus.

Loki smirked charmingly at the beautiful young woman who seemed to have taken a shine to him.

He had been reluctant at first when Odin demanded that he, Thor, and a few others were to go and protect a ridiculous ‘magical’ school for wizards and witches on Midgard. He found their way of using magic tedious in comparison to his. Though after arriving, even he couldn’t deny that after he had seen some of the more experienced students and teachers use their magical powers that some were rather impressive. Toshi was one of those.

Though as the days went on, Loki didn’t fail to notice that Toshi was often looking in the direction of the potion’s teacher, Severus Snape. And that Severus was often looking at Toshi, and glaring daggers at Loki whenever Toshi was next to him.

Loki wasn’t stupid, of course he put two and two together very quickly. He was surprised to learn that the two teachers disliked one another, that they found the other irritating, but the glances at one another was so evident to him.

One weekend, Loki bided his time and he knew that there was a dance tomorrow night. So, he decided to put his little theory to the test. The teachers were all just hovering around, talking and having a drink. Loki waited until Toshi was near Severus, then he approached her.

‘Ah, Toshi. I’ve been looking for you.’ He smiled charmingly at her.

Toshi did find herself melting a little, he was a very good-looking god. Very charming, too. Though it made her realise she most definitely had a certain type…

‘Hey, Loki. Everything ok?’ She smiled at him.

‘More than ok.’ He grinned and could see out of the corner of his eye that Severus was listening and watching intently, even though he was pretending to listen to Hagrid rambling on about his Hippogriff, Buckbeak.

‘I heard about the dance tomorrow, we’ve been told we’re allowed to attend. I thought I’d ask, whether you’d like to be my date for it? Providing you don’t already have one, that is.’ Loki asked her.

Toshi’s cheeks turned a little bit red. Loki noticed she glanced very briefly over at Severus before looking back at Loki and she nodded in agreement. Before she could speak though, Severus was suddenly right beside her, hand firmly gripping her elbow.

‘She does indeed already have a date for the dance.’ He announced quickly, glaring daggers at Loki.

Loki raised an eyebrow at him. ‘Oh, well, my apologies. I wanted to make sure that this beautiful woman wasn’t going solo.’ He grinned.

‘No need to worry about that.’ Severus said through gritted teeth.

Toshi was in too much shock to say anything, she couldn’t do anything but look at Severus with wide eyes.

‘A word, Toshi.’ Severus said in a rather clipped tone, he guided her out of the room by her elbow.

Loki smirked as he picked up his drink and watched them leave.

‘What are you looking so smug about, brother? I hope you’re not up to your mischievous tricks again.’ Thor asked suspiciously as he approached him.

‘Oh, just using my observant skills to help two people realise their feelings for one another, is all.’ Loki grinned.

Thor just looked utterly confused in response.

-

‘What on earth are you doing? Why would you say I have a date for the dance when I don’t? I could’ve gone with Loki, a literal God!’ Toshi hissed at Severus once she got her brain to kick into gear.

‘You are not going with him. I’m your date for the dance.’ Severus said determinedly, he kept walking as he dragged her along. Though with his large strides, she was struggling to keep up without tripping over her own feet.

‘Sev, stop!’ She yelled at him and pulled free from his grasp.

Severus raised an eyebrow at her and surprised her by backing her against the wall, he placed a hand firmly on the wall beside her head, making her jump a little. Though she was instantly aroused, even if she was trying not to be…

‘What have I told you about calling me that?’ He narrowed his eyes at her and got far too close for comfort… but Toshi didn’t want him to move. She liked having him this close. She could smell him, and he was making her head swim.

Toshi smirked and shrugged. ‘I thought you’d know by now, I don’t do what you tell me to.’ She said snarkily.

Severus raised an eyebrow at her and he gripped her chin. ‘Well, maybe you should start doing what I say and behave yourself.’ He growled out and kissed her roughly, surprising her completely and knocking her off guard.

Fuck, his lips were so soft against hers. She instantly melted and Severus could feel the change in her body straight away, he couldn’t help but smirk against her lips.

His hand slid down to her neck, he gently caressed her there for a moment and then wrapped his hand around her further and squeezed slightly, making her gasp into his mouth.

‘Maybe it’s time I put you in your place.’ He drawled slowly, punctuating every word carefully as his other hand landed on her hip.

Toshi squeezed her thighs together at the thought. She knew she had to pick her words carefully, this was it. The moment she had been waiting for…

‘I’d like to see you try.’ She whispered.

Severus smirked, then in a flash, he threw her over his shoulder and stormed down the hall, until they reached his office and he bundled her inside. He didn’t bother locking the door behind him as he had his hands all over Toshi, he just kicked it closed.

He went straight for his desk and shoved everything off it in one large swoop of his arm, not caring that his papers scattered to the floor and ink splattered everywhere.

Toshi quickly found herself folded over his desk, her cheek was pressed against the wood and she felt bits of spilled ink seep onto her skin. Though she found she didn’t care and had other things to think about, as Severus used his wand to remove her clothes in an instant, making her gasp.

She did attempt to lean up, but Severus put his hand at the back of her neck and forced her back down.

‘You will do as you’re told.’ He barked at her, then, using his wand he began spanking the back of her thighs.

Toshi gasped and moaned with every strike, even as he got higher and began spanking her ass with it. It stung like hell, biting into her skin, she found she was a bit relieved when he relaced his wand with his hand, which made the pain a little more bearable… Though not by much, he had a mean swing with a lot of strength behind it.

‘Naughty girls get punished. Good girls get rewarded. Now, are you a naughty girl or a good girl?’ Severus growled into her ear as he stopped spanking her and leaned over her body.

‘Good… I can be good…’ Toshi panted, she struggled to stay still, feeling his weight against her back, his clothes rubbed against her raw ass.

‘Hmm, we shall see. You’ve certainly been naughty up till now. I don’t know if you deserve a reward. Though I know I certainly do, and you need to learn who you belong to. Not some god that thinks he’s every girls wet dream.’ Severus sneered.

There was a brief and strange cold wind that seemed to flow through the office, making them both shiver. Toshi did look up and could’ve sworn she saw a large shadow in the corner of the office. She didn’t get to dwell over it for long though, as Severus rudely shoved his hand between her thighs.

‘Jesus, you are soaking. It seems you’ve been desperate for me all this time, hmm?’ He tsked at her.

‘Please, fuck me, Sev. Please!’ Toshi whined.

Severus rapidly brought his hand down on her ass again, making her yelp. ‘What did I say about calling me that?’

‘Severus! Please!’ Toshi yelled, she began wiggling frantically in need.

‘That’s better, good girl.’ Severus purred as his fingers glided through her soaking wet folds. He felt her body tremble in response to his praise.

‘Ohh, you like being my good girl, hmm?’ He grinned. His finger began to trail over her throbbing clit, causing her to buck against his hand as she gripped the sides of his desk so tightly, her knuckles started to turn white.

‘Yes! Please... I’ll do anything.’

‘Hmm, there is so much I’d like to do to you, and have done to me by you… but right now, you need to be claimed thoroughly and properly. So there will be no more shenanigans from you and you’ll never forget who you belong to.’

Severus was saying all the right things to set Toshi’s body alight. She had never seen this side of him before, but her body was cheering in delight at the revelation.

Toshi began to see stars when he thrust two long fingers into her, twisting and curling in all the right ways to make her crumble. She didn’t expect him to make her come so soon, but he did… He enjoyed feeling her come all over his fingers, and he sucked them clean after with a moan.

‘I’d say you’re more than ready now.’

He pulled her a bit closer to the edge of his desk, for easier access for him. He flipped his cape back out of the way and undid his trousers, letting his cock spring free.

Toshi kept wiggling her ass, tempting him to hurry up as much as possible. He smirked at the sight of her, splayed out on his desk. So desperate and wet for him to take her.

He gripped her hips as he pressed his cock into her. They both closed their eyes for a moment, catching their breath… Then Severus unleashed hell on her. His fingers dug hard into her hips, leaving marks, as he pulled back until just the tip of his cock was still inside her, then he rammed back into her as far as possible.

Toshi began unashamedly moaning and whimpering as Severus fucked her roughly. The legs of the desk began to wobble and shift, neither of them cared though if it were to break.

Severus’ jaw was clenched hard as he focused on fucking her into next week. He wanted to break her, to make her completely high on his cock, a blubbering wreck… and that’s exactly what he did.

Toshi couldn’t form sentences or even think straight, she knew in the moment she definitely saw someone in the corner of the room, and was sure she even heard another lewd moan that didn’t belong to Severus… Though sounded slightly familiar. Yet, she forgot about it within seconds. All she could focus on was Severus’ cock pounding into her.

Severus let go of her hips, his nail prints were embedded in her skin, and he opted for grabbing a fistful of her hair. He tugged her head backwards as he lay himself over her more, his lips right by her ear.

‘I’m going to fill you up, make sure that every step back to your room you take, you will feel me inside you, trickling down your thighs. You’re mine, and you’re my date tomorrow night.’ He growled ferally as he thrust deep and held himself there as he came inside her.

That set Toshi off like a rocket, too. She clamped down hard around his cock, like her body was trying to milk everything out of him. They were both panting hard and a sweaty mess as Severus collapsed on top of her, though she found she enjoyed feeling the weight of him pin her down. Even if the edge of the desk was digging into her abdomen, she would’ve stayed there all night if he wanted her to.

‘Holy… fuck…’ Toshi gasped after a while.

Severus chuckled and kissed her shoulder as he forced himself up off her. He gently helped her to her feet and turned her around, her face was flushed and grew even redder when she saw Severus eye up her body hungrily. She looked down and saw his cock starting to harden again already.

‘I think we should take this to my room.’ Severus hummed as he stepped in closer to her and held her chin to kiss her.

Toshi moaned in response and nodded in agreement.

Neither of them noticed the flash of green from the corner of his office as they left…

-

The following night at the dance, Toshi was delighted to be on Severus’ arm for the duration. He barely moved away from her the entire time, dancing with her and keeping her company.

They both noticed Loki with a woman on his arm, an ex-student who was training to become a teacher at Hogwarts. Loki noticed them both staring in wonder at how he got another date so fast.

He wandered over to them after telling the woman he’d be back shortly.

‘Nice to see that my plan worked.’ Loki grinned widely as he approached.

‘Plan?’ Toshi frowned.

Loki chuckled. ‘Did you really think I was so blind to not notice the way you two lusted after one another?’

Toshi and Severus both blushed a little bit as they glanced at each other.

‘I knew that Severus was close to bursting with jealousy, he just needed one last little push…’ Loki picked up two glasses of wine from beside Toshi. He tilted his head at them. ‘It was quite the show in your office last night, Severus.’

Severus’ face dropped and he looked furious. Loki put his finger up to stop him from saying anything.

‘I got it to happen, I had to take my reward somehow. A god has needs, too. Besides, I already had a date for tonight lined up. They don’t call me silver tongue for nothing.’ Loki winked at them and then headed back to his date. ‘You’re welcome.’ He called back to them over his shoulder.

‘So there was someone else there!’ Toshi gasped.

‘I’m going to kill him.’ Severus snarled.

Toshi couldn’t help but laugh. She put her hand on Severus’ chest and patted him. ‘To be fair, his plan did work.’

Severus sighed and glared down at her. ‘If he pulls anything like this again, can I kill him?’

‘Deal.’ Toshi nodded.

[nightqueen1221]

Hello!!☺️ I have a request! Can you do Kurapika finding out there's another Kurta alive and the reader is a F!Y/n

If you decide to do it, I'll be looking forward to reading it!🤗💗

    It had been years. You thought you were the only one left. For years you kept the fact you were Kurta away from people. You just happened to not have been found when your clan was attacked. Even with Kurapika not even being in the province, you had assumed that if they found your clan they easily could have tracked one person down.

    This was your only thought so long before till you saw him. You were walking around when you glanced over to see him talking with a person with a small but round physic. Their were a few other people in the area with a girl in the center with light blue hair and intriguing clothes. You took a second glace, trying to see if it wasn't a dream. He really hadn't changed in the past few years. He still had the same beautiful face, the same golden hair, and enchanting eyes.

    You had a crush on him since childhood, thinking he was dead made you feel worthless, like you didn't even try and stop it. Then suddenly he just appears in front of you alive and well. It made your heart skip a beat. You wanted to just run up to him and hug him, tell him everything that happened. Yet, it made you think why he never went back the province. Did he not care? Did he not want to see you? You started to realize you were over thinking things and lost focus on the main thing. He was walking away.

    In the split second of your thoughts, you pulled a hold up over your head and started following from behind. The people around the girl, including Kurapika, you assumed to be guards or servants of some sort. You didn't want them to notice you as a threat or a creep, but it was kinda hard to. You were following them for a specific person, not the girl they were surrounding. You finally got at least a closer look at the man you wished to see again. He looked, sad? Mad? You couldn't put your finger on it. However, you could just tell he wasn't the same.

    "Hey! What do you think your doing?" A tall man with short black hair and tattoos under his eyes shouts at you demanding an explanation.

    "I-I umm, I can't really explain why I'm following you. I promise I'm not dangero-"

    "Than why were you following us?" His tone getting more a aggressive. You could feel your heartbeat getting faster, all you could think was, 'this is it, I'm dead.'

    "Dalzollene, your scaring her." A soft voice speaks up. It was the girl Kurapika was talking to. "It's a bit hard to tell, but it doesn't seem like she has bad intents."

    "We can't make such clear bets as of now when, we have yet to learn who she is over what she's doing." Kurapika had talked in a way that made you feel like he could take control over any situation. 

    "Could you tell us your name?" He asked, it was calming hearing him speak. Dispite the fact you were getting interrogated. You didn't really know how to respond, you had so much to tell him yet, the words never came out.

    "Maybe she's a customer?" The girl in the center said. "Neon, who would follow you around to get their fortune read while your bodyguards are around?" The man from before replied.

    "But it's light out. If she really wanted to do something, wouldn't she wait till nighttime?"

    "She could have just happened to spot us while it's light out, and it doesn't really matter time it is."

    "Yes it does!" She yelled, he was getting on her temper. She definitely had a bratty attitude. "People are around during the day and can clearly see us. If it was night than she would have less to worry about. That's why I get more deals that are to be kept secret during the dark!"

    The man, clearly annoyed, turned to you and asked, "Are you a customer?"

    "Uh, um, n-no, I'm not a customer for whatever you guys are doing." You really didn't want to keep talking about this and wanted to just run away.

    "She was probably just walking the same way as us. I'm sorry for the inconvenience miss." The soft voice apologized.

    "N-no, I'll just take a different way, I'm sorry." You quickly said and walked across the street. You mental cursed at yourself for getting caught. They turned the corner, most likely to forget the incident by tommorow. It was one of your only chances to talk to him. Yet you screwed it up. History does repeat itself. There was something inside of you, it made you want to follow then again, telling you, "it's not over yet."

    It felt like an instinct, a command you couldn't deny. Your mind fought, but your body moved. You blended in with the crowd, hoping for wherever they were going wasn't too far. It couldn't have been, if she had a business and was walking the streets rather than driving... She had to be going somewhere close by. The group entered what seemed to be an open spaced area. Maybe if you were lucky, you could get close enough to talk to him!

    There were a lot less people here than before. Taking caution was an understatement. They could most definitely sense you if you got to close or suspicious. You almost didn't care about getting caught, the boy of your past, standing in the distance. Yet the voice shouted in your mind, "be patient." Resisting the urge to shout back at it, you waited. Waited and waited. It felt pointless, standing here doing nothing.

    Without warning, he walked away from his group. It was a juvenating feeling that settled within. You walked, more like rushed, over to his side. The fear of him not caring appeared once more and made your pace much slower. Does he really want to see you? Would he tell you to leave? Could he even remember who you are?

    "U-um, hi, I'm the girl from earlier, that was following you guys. I wasn't following for any other reasons, than... ummm..." It felt like your mind went blank. " I was following you, b-because I wanted to see you...again."

    "I'm sorry, but I'm not the person you're looking for."

    "No! No, you are! I would recognize you from anywhere. I don't know if you would remember me though." You removed you hood revealing your face. " We've already met before, but I'm Y/N" You looked at the ground before staring up at him. His face previously had shown little to no emotion. Now? It wasn't something you could quite read, he looked, joyous? Sad? Maybe even nostalgia, but it was so much that you couldn't have expected to see.

    "Y-Y/N!? I-I thought you had died! I mean, I couldn't find your body when I went back the province. I had just assumed the troupe took your corpse!" He was on the verge of tears it looked. He wrapped his arms around you in the tightest, yet most caring embrace you've felt in quite sometime. He backed away for a moment, "Wait, how can you prove you're who I think you are?"

    You knew the answer to that, The Scarlet Eyes. Which were activated wether you wanted it or not. You were to full of satisfaction in the moment causing this. He hugged you again, feeling his heartbeat against you. You could swear his heart skipped a beat, or perhaps yours? It didn't matter, nothing mattered here. You could feel him begin to cry. The feeling was unknown, a mutual and shared, but unknown, feeling.

    "Please, please stay by my side." His words were strained, yet powerful enough to make you do as they command.

[dandorime]

Continued from Part 1

Reginald Crane took a moment to scan the empty cafeteria space. Other Agency staff were surely working late somewhere in the building on other floors, but he needed this one to himself for a while. The janitor, Peter, had been along to empty the trash a minute ago, but he and his yellow cart were far down the hall now.

The lack of an audience didn't make Crane feel any less anxious about what he had to say, unfortunately.

"Agent Phoenix..." he haltingly enunciated into the microphone, "has... uh, confided in me, recently, that he has...er... died."

Roxana Prism, on the other end, said nothing.

"Okay, so..."

"... multiple times," Reginald added, with emphasis.

There was lengthy, worrisome silence on the frequency.

Prism didn't sound annoyed this time. She sounded... well, what was that tone? Curious? Intrigued?

"Isn't that Cotard's delusion or something? I think I remember that from my second year of neuropsych..."

"It's certainly some kind of delusion," Crane continued, "He told me he dies quite regularly, in fact. Furthermore, he's developed what I can only surmise is a hallucination to cope with the, uh, incidents."

Crane gave an inward sigh of relief. Good, he thought, she was going to take this seriously, as a doctor and a woman of science.

The way he desperately needed her to.

Prism was definitely interested now, speaking quietly and directly into the microphone pinned to her collar. He imagined her stepping away from her robotic prototypes for the moment to focus on this issue with him, and it gave him hope.

"What kind of hallucination?"

"It's strange how specifically he described it. He told me that, having just, uh, died, he always finds himself in a 'little room' somewhere. There is no way in or out, although he says the shape and size of it have changed over the years-..."

"Years?" Prism's voice strained the slightest bit on the word, "this has been going on for years?"

The concern in her voice was a genuine relief to Crane. For the past week, he had kept his agent's confounding revelations to himself, mulling over the potentialities of revealing them further. How best to reach out for help? How not to break his agent's trust in the process? How to live with the consequences if he maintained his silence on the matter, and let the neuroticism develop further?

Finally he had someone to share his anxiety with.

"Yes," he said tiredly, "for years."

"What's in the room?"

Prism's voice cut through Crane's sense of relief.

"Pardon?"

"The little room where your agent wakes up every time he dies," she demanded, "What's in the room with him?"

Crane heard the click of a door closing on Prism's end of the conversation, and the squeak of someone sitting down in a rolling chair.

"In the room? Ah... there's, well, he says he receives a report about how he died..."

"Morbid. What else?"

Crane hesitated. He had wanted Prism's ear, and now he had it, but there was something... unnerving about the sudden urgency of her questions.

"Reginald?" the radio crackled sharply in his ear. "Talk to me. What else does Agent Phoenix see in the room?"

"He... told me that he sees a button. If he presses it, he's suddenly alive again. Everything is... undone."

There was more to say, but in that moment, Crane decided to stop revealing details.

"That must be how he breaks out of it," Prism muttered, almost to herself, "a definite symbol he can activate to return to..."

Crane could hear the furious scratching of pencil on a steno pad behind her words.

"Do NOT write any of this down, please, Roxana!"

"Sorry, scientist habit. I'll burn it," she assured him, "But listen, you need to get your agent a full psychological evaluation, like, yesterday."

"I'm not sure I'm comfortable doing that," Crane admitted, "Which is why I'm reaching out, you see. I was hoping you could, er, suggest some technology or technique to help me solve this matter internally, so to speak."

There was a pause. The rattle of the rolling chair in Prism's office told Crane she had just stood up sharply, leaving it behind.

"I'm not that kind of doctor, Reginald."

"But the implants," Crane pleaded, "you've designed and installed them yourself, in dozens of agents! Your research on neural pathways is internationally lauded. Certainly you have some advice-..."

"Get him to psych," Prism said flatly. "That's my advice."

Crane heard a click, then the static of an empty frequency. He gazed forlornly down into his slightly soggy paper cup of tepid tea.

Now there were two people in the Agency who knew Agent Phoenix was insane, and Crane only felt worse.

_____

Dr. Prism stared for a solid ten minutes at the pale yellow pages on her desk. She really hadn't recorded more than a few words of her conversation with Crane, but from the minute she recognized what was occurring, she knew she had to write down something to keep from screaming aloud:

- Thinks he's died (lots of times)

- Wakes up in a room somewhere (???)

- Learns how he died (!)

- CAN START OVER

Prism took a deep breath and let it out slowly. She carefully tore the sheet of paper from the pad, folded it neatly, and tucked it inside the breast pocket of her lab coat. She then calmly walked to the door and locked it.

Prism lifted the receiver of the secure internal phone in the corner of the office. Dialing was unnecessary: this line was direct.

There was a click on the other end.

"Sir," Dr. Prism said softly, "we've got a second one."

[linasofia]

Any chance of an early Obsession fic? Asking for me a friend

Hi @enchantzz!

Thanks for your ask. How can I resist writing a ficlet after the latest tease from Netflix? My muse even decided to create a moodboard. This is my idea of teasing…

The Game

Fandom: Obsession (Coming to Netflix April 2023)

Relationship: William Farrow x Fem!Reader

Warnings: 18+

He’s watching me. I know he is. Even from across the room, I sense his presence. Every step I take is a struggle to remain calm, and I can feel his gaze burning through my silky dress. When I glance in his direction, he captures my gaze with his steel blue stare, and that makes it impossible for me to breathe normally. He doesn’t drink—he never does—but I have to take a sip of my champagne every time I feel I’m on the brink of exposing my true feelings. I am deeply affected by his presence. How could I not be when the man I willingly obey during the darkest hours is watching me like I’m his property? Which I am—at least in his bedroom. William and I met only a month ago, but we have already formed a strong bond. He leads, and I follow—that’s our game.

I was surprised when William asked me to come and join him for a night at the hotel. He is one of the key speakers at this event, and I… I don’t even belong here. I saw his face on a huge roll-up as soon as I entered, with Dr. William Farrow written below in large italics. There were some other faces too, but I didn't even bother registering them. I stand in a crowd of people. The warm light from the many small lamps hanging from the ceiling creates a soft atmosphere in the room, and people around me mingle with glasses or small plates in their hands. But I can’t eat. I try to talk to people. My mouth smiles kindly to the faces I meet, but I don’t see them. In my world, it is only him and me—and the strict discipline he demands as soon as I let my clothes fall to the floor.

My body aches as I suddenly notice how William turns to talk to someone who approaches him. I can’t see her face, but something in the way he leans in when they speak tells me that she is not a colleague. The blond woman’s perfect locks spill over her shoulders, and I can’t help envying their beautiful shine. Without control of my own actions, I excuse myself to a small group of people, whose attempts to have a decent conversation with me already bore me more than I allow them to see, and move closer to William and the unfamiliar woman. My unreasonable heart beats hard, jealousy floods my veins, but I try to tell myself that I have no right to react this way. I swallow the last of my champagne as I cross the floor, and when I reach the bar, I put the empty glass on the counter. The bartender instantly gives me a polite smile, and with a small tap on the bowl, I signal to him that I want another one. My glass is refilled without a word, and I watch how the bubbles dance in the glass. I recognize the golden label on the bottle’s neck very well, and I briefly wonder what an open bar mustcost on an evening like this. Not that it matters to the wealthy owners of the company who will pay for their guests' comfort.

Our plan for the evening is that I’m supposed to follow William to his room as soon as he can leave. Time is precious for us, and I don’t want to waste it on meaningless conversations. Just the thought of being alone with him again sends a small shiver of excitement down my spine. A whole night together—without the risk of being interrupted—is something we have never had the luxury of experiencing. With slightly trembling fingers, I pick up my glass and take a careful sip. I don’t want to drink too much. Alcohol weakens my senses, and I want to be able to feel every touch—soft or harsh—of William’s hands. I rest against the counter and take a deep breath. The dim light above the bar makes the area appear smaller and more intimate, and I manage to filter out the constant chatter of voices around me. When I focus, I can hear the music playing. The seductive tones from a cello seep from hidden speakers and surround the room with a classy yet alluring sound. I close my eyes and listen. A beating I recognize as my heart accompanies the music, and I smile.

William doesn’t speak, yet I instinctively know he’s standing next to me. I don’t understand if it’s his scent my senses catch or if my body just craves him beyond what can be explained as sane. But it matters less—he is here. Like a flower basking in the warm light from the sun, I turn my face towards him, and when he acknowledges me with a nod, a hint of a smile crosses his thin lips. He must have been to the barber recently, his hair and short beard are newly trimmed, and I can’t wait to make a mess out of his well-styled hair. I’m so grateful that he doesn’t dye his hair, for his beautiful grey sides give his hair character, and it suits him so well. William always dresses nicely, and tonight is no exception. The suit is no doubt the result of a skilled tailor, and his shirt is the same color as his expressive eyes. Their unusual shade of blue was the first thing I noticed when I met him, and I still fall helplessly under his spell whenever I look into them. A small gasp escapes my lips as I let my eyes wander to his casually open collar. Two buttons, but they make all the difference—and he knows it. None of us speak, for words are not needed between us. Our communication is on a more lascivious level, and William discreetly lets his gaze follow the shape of my dress. I know that in his mind, I’m already undressing, and that knowledge heats my body. When I meet his gaze again, the dark look in his eyes only confirms it. He slips a key card into my hand and leans closer. His breath is warm against my ear, and it makes me weak when he lowers his voice to a daring whisper. ”Room 505. Wait for me—naked.” Then he turns and walks away with not even a glance over his shoulder. With a small smile, I hide the card in my hand and try to look unaffected as I scan the room. Then I walk through the ocean of unfamiliar bodies to the elevators. My glass of champagne stands abandoned on the counter, half empty.

💙 If you like my writing, please consider spreading the love and reblogging.💙

Taglist and others who might be interested: @lathalea @legolasbadass @laurfilijames @i-did-not-mean-to @enchantzz @fizzyxcustard @middleearthpixie @xxbyimm @bitter-sweet-farmgirl @kibleedibleedoo @mariannetora @haly-reads @sunnysidesidra @rachel1959 @knittastically @quiall321 @medusas-hairband @fulltimecrazy @s0ftd3m0n @emrfangirl @glimmering-darling-dolly @lilith15000 @clumsy-wonderland @theawkwardbutterfly @exhausted-humxn-being @beenthroughalot @chaikittie @piscesvancouverite @sotwk @dontaskmehowdontaskmewhy @mrsdurin

[pure-garbage]

Lullaby Of The Lockbreaker. Reconciliation And Contemplation At Midnight

"Hey."

Zoro's voice broke through Lana's reverie. She had drawn the night watch and the calm sea was providing her the perfect backdrop to reflect on the events of the day.

"Hey," she replied quietly as Zoro settled across from her in the crows nest. The bandages around his right arm caught her eye, the remnants of Aokiji's freezing touch.

"Does it hurt?" she asked.

"Yeah. I hate to imagine how Robin must feel," Zoro observed.

"She's tough. She'll be fine."

"Yeah."

"Zoro?"

"Mm?"

"I'm sorry about earlier. You upset me, but what you said wasn't wrong either. I should have given you more credit for your intentions."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. The fight with Aokiji proved you trust me to handle myself, so I guess that means I was overreacting, huh?"

"Just a little. If it makes you feel better, I won't speak for you again. You were right too, even if you were being too sensitive."

"I appreciate that," Lana smiled.

"So, did you and the admiral end up making any plans?" Zoro asked, only half-teasing.

"Huh? What do you mean?"

"When you were talking by the rock."

"Oh. Tch! Don't be a jerk," Lana scoffed when she realized what he was implying.

"Come on," he goaded, hiding any trace of how bothered he'd been by Lana's interactions wtih Aokiji behind a devilish smirk. "I saw you blushing at him."

"Yeah, 'cause he caught me off guard with his nerve," Lana said with a roll of her eyes.

"Just his nerve? He didn't charm you? His power didn't impress you?"

Lana frowned at the resentment Zoro couldn't completely conceal in his tone.

'Hey! She's not free, you perv!'

Lana's eyebrows shot up, Zoro's earlier words suddenly cast in a new light as she realized what was really going on.

"Zoro! You didn't feel jealous of that old creep, did you?"

"No!"

"You did!" Lana gasped accusingly.

"Not really! I didn't like that he was looking at you that way, that's all," Zoro growled.

"That's what it means to be jealous, stupid."

"I don't think so," Zoro insisted stubbornly.

"Don't argue for arguments sake," Lana tsked. "C'mere."

She beckoned him with a finger and he scooted closer obligingly.

"Wasn't jealous," he grumbled.

"Stop talking."

Lana straddled his hips and guided his hands to her waist. He wrapped his arms around her gratefully while she kissed him, clasping his face tenderly between her palms. Zoro returned the kiss hungrily, fingers digging into her flesh with a possessive greed that made her breath come harder as she pressed her body close to his.

"Listen," she sighed, hands sliding up to tousle his already disheveled hair. "I'm only interested in making plans with you. Okay?"

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. So don't get all worked up every time you catch someone looking at me the wrong way. It's not worth it. Right?"

"'Kay," he sighed.

"Just take it easy. Let me handle myself, or I'll have to handle you, you got that?"

"As if you could," Zoro smirked. Even so, her words soothed his injured ego and her assurances smoothed over his ruffled feathers.

Briefly, Lana thought again of admiral Aokiji and the advice he'd given her, advice she'd just passed on to Zoro. She put him from her mind as Zoro demanded another kiss. She gave it to him, savoring the heat of his body as the wind picked up a little, rocking the ship and sweeping a chill over the lovers. The sea to the south was still glaciated from Aokiji's power, lending the the atmosphere of the island an unseasonable coldness.

If Lana was being completely honest, she would have admitted that she had spent a few hours up in the lookout wondering what might have happened if she made plans with Aokiji. Would it have changed the way the day played out at all? Unlikely, she decided.

'A marine and a pirate. What a recipe for disaster,' she thought disparagingly.

Still, the tall, handsome admiral enticed her in a way that she couldn't fully put her finger on. She didn't want to linger in contemplation on the subject, preferring to forget the fleeting attraction and focus instead on the present moment and what she had in her hands.

"Stay up here with me," Lana requested, climbing off Zoro and pulling with her insistently.

"I'll distract you," he protested, even as he settled into her lap.

"No you won't," Lana assured him, playing with his hair and his earrings while she scanned the horizon.

"I will. I'll want to touch you," he warned her. True to his word, his hands trailed over her thighs, wandering with a lazy lustfulness that made Lana bite her lip.

"You won't touch me," she said confidently, gathering his hands onto his chest and folding them around one of hers.

"I won't?"

"No."

"You're overestimating my self control," he sighed, nestling his head against her stomach. Her free hand traced his collarbone, slid up his neck to caress the sharp line of his jaw. She rubbed a path from his chin to his ear, over and over as his steady breaths brushed softly across her knuckles.

"Self control won't matter," she purred soothingly.

"It won't?"

"Not even a little. 'Cause you'll be sleeping in about two minutes."

"Nuh-uh. I'm going to keep looking at you. All night, probably," Zoro informed her.

"You won't. You're feeling really tired."

"I know what you're doing," he accused. "You're not as sneaky as you think you are."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

"If that's true, why do you want to yawn so bad?"

"I don't-"

Lana intentionally took a deep, shuddering breath, letting her mouth fall open wide in a long, forced yawn. She glanced down to see Zoro instinctively following her example, sighing in defeat after his features settled.

"You play so dirty," he complained half-heartedly.

"What do you expect from a pirate?" she chuckled. "Now... close your eyes. It'll feel so good..."

She dragged the pads of her fingers over his eyelids, pulling them down gently. He complied with her instructions, groaning quietly as she stroked his cheek lightly with the backs of her fingers. His eyes fluttered open, long, layered lashes sweeping up so he could take one last look at her. She closed his eyes for him again patiently, sinking her fingertips into his hair after to rub his scalp.

"Go to sleep, Zoro," she sighed sweetly.

He hummed contentedly, breaths steadying as he gave in to his fatigue and the spell Lana had woven for him.

__________________________________________________

<== Previous Chapter

Next Chapter ==>

== First Chapter ==

[fuwaprince]

I'm howling as in doing whatever Howl is doing here in this gif

Got no family, my friends are all far and most aren't even in positions to support themselves (bless them) let alone others/questionably-worthy me. Life feels almost loveless, the economy sucks and I still haven't got a job. I get daily reminders that the people closest to me don't particularly enjoy me taking up space.

My body is twitching and I'm just so alone. I don't speak as in talk to anybody who actually likes and wants to talk to me so whenever I use my voice it's usually to defend myself or escape an interrogative situation. Barelyyyy eating enough. I'm actively losing weight not in a good way

This next one is big.

The one person willing to help me irl is a disrespectful creep to say the least. I'm hurt that people can be so shallow and sickly motivated. I'm sad that no one else here cares. His care comes off so insincerely when he says it's "because he GENUINELY loves me" but consistently doesn't fuckin act very loving. Do I block him? HOW COULD I? I TRULY depend on him for emergencies... rides to interviews, for covering the difference when I'm short on rent, for food when begging doesn't work. He was the only person willing to look for me when I was on the streets and maybe his reason for doing so wasn't very nice but he did it. That means something to me I guess? What does it mean?

I straight up BEG this dude "PLEASE... DO NOT only decide to help my desperate ass based on the premise that you expect your fantasies (that I'm going to be pressured enough into becoming your wife legal possession at the end of all this) to turn into reality!!!!!!".

When I need a hug and have no one but he says he's willing to drive to see me, I HATE knowing I need to say no because I know it's also like saying yes to something else secretly!!! I just want hugs. Innocent physical intimacy. Handholding, just sitting on a bench close enough to touch! I need a hug more than I need food sometimes so it feels.

If I ask him to stop, he asks WHY HUH? 😡 while continuing. Anyone remember Boris from Dreaming Mary? He does this all the time so I expect it when I see him and he immediately gets touchy. When I kindly remind him that I'm not interested, he suddenly shifts into offended fucking asshole. Rude comments. Degradation. Suddenly starts talking about his gun and how he wants to shoot it and wants a new one 🙄. Sometimes it's pettier punishment like I'll be lucky to get a response if I dare mention anybody else especially if I love them more than him. I grieved my ex gf and he was just not happy about that at all. Kept demanding I explain why it couldn't be him and kept being all "what makes her so great? 🙄 pfft" ( EVERYTHING BTW SHE WAS THE MOON AND STARS AND I WILL FOREVER STAY LOYAL TO HER). But no this dude gets NASTY MEAN. Don't fall for the sad boy shit. Like he hopes I fucking starve without him type shit!!!!!!!!!! He'll ignore me complaining about hunger pains all the time but when he wants to he'll ignore me and then come back after some period of punishment (shunning) like "did you want food? get ready so you can get a small snack" "there's snacks at my house" and what am I going to say??? No???? Well actually that is exactly correct. I do say no because I'm that fucking seriously not interested and I choose to starve over taking that.

He gets angry but he knows his demands aren't possible. NOT A CHANCE . I'll say it to his face. I have to walk on eggshells but I still hate to be taken advantage of because I'm not standing my ground.

He still tries to tower over me and shit when I'm turned around and I elbow/kick behind me to remind him I fucking feel his body heat because that's how close he is without actually touching me. He likes to do that in stores. I was in so much pain from cramps that I accepted his offer to go to the store in the middle of the night. There was a store open down the street from my house but he chose to drive to the one farthest away and says oops when I ask where he's going. He misses every exit he possibly can before I catch on when taking me back to where I live on the way back from trips like these. He always does that. It's so manipulative and shitty. Just take me fucking home.

One time he saw I had a stun gun in my bag while going through it without my permission and he said I didn't need to carry that around him and I said I sure as hell do. Which fucking sucks. Any normal person would just exit and block but if I did that, who would I be able to turn to? He really has caused me trouble but I would be in greater trouble without him and that's the truth. The only answer is to lean on myself or get the support of the state, which I was receiving and then my mom sabotaged (!) So it got cancelled which is why I'm depending on the help that he happens to offer! Do you see the issues there? I don't have any family. My friends can't help me besides sending me virtual hugs and everybody is so tired. They're doing their best not to be depressed and here I come! A doomsday cloud big enough to cover the sun. I wouldn't want to talk to me either. I've been blocked for asking for help from friends just because people don't want to be involved and don't want the stress. I remember "I want that shit out of my hair".

Another thing: I call my stuffed animal my son because like... Idk. He's my son!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And that creepy asshole fucker kept calling him HIS SON and OUR SON and I got so pissed and kept correcting him. The same way I would correct him when he'd call me his girlfriend to his friends.

Can someone who isn't him please care more than he does?

[the-broken-truth]

Hi! I just had another idea!!

Imagine a moment similar to when Sif confronts Thor about Odin’s negligence and Thor decides to kill Atreus.

In that moment, Sif tells Thor that they can’t let Atreus/Loki get closer to his children, but suddenly Kratos appear and tells them that they are gonna take Björn and Revna away from them. Of course Thrúd and Thor gets ready to fight but Björn doesn’t want to any of them to fight and just get out of there, but Kratos pushes harshly the Great Bear away and the boy falls and hit his head against a rock.

Angrily Thor and Thrúd begins the fight and Thor request Sif to take Björn away from there. Sif does that and she ran off with her son, of course Kratos and Atreus wanted to chase them but Thrúd and Thor stops them,

Later Björn wakes up screaming “AH! THRÚD, FATHER CAREFUL!!!” but when he realizes he’s at home and in that moment Thor and Thrúd appears a bit bloodied but saying that they just didn’t killed or got killed is because Odin stopped all the mess.

Broken Truth (Reads the ask): When Thor tried to kill Atreus, they were in Niflheim when Sif appeared and started talking to Thor about Odin and Loki. I'll have Björn come and Thrud come with her and talk to Thor when Kratos appears with the Bifrost Gateway. Now, let the words weave together.

[Location: Niflheim - After Finding The Mask Fragment]

"No! Leave him alone, I command it." Odin said as he held his hand up to stop the Valkyries from taking another step toward the Jotunn.

"You said no more Aesir blood would be spilled. You said family comes first. You don't think this is retribution for him being here? He's put your granddaughter in danger. He's made your son miserable. You know what he's done to your grandson and that he's hellbent on getting him back; you can't let that happen to Björn after everything he's done." Sif said as she gestured to Björn and Thrud, who was glaring at Loki, who was looking at The Great Bear with obsession in his eyes.

"Loki didn't kill Heimdall - his father did. Your daughter is old enough to make her own mistakes and your husband started drinking again all on his own. And one more thing - I don't care about this 'Blood Contract' that was done, this bear cub is not Aesir, nor is he my grandson. Dismissed!" Odin demanded as he walked over to the Valkyries.

Sif was silent as the All-Father walked away from her after he dismissed her concerns in order to speak to Mist and Hrist - The Valkyrie Sisters that accompanied her in order to arrest Loki for the death of Heimdall caused by the Ghost of Sparta even though the All-Father swore that there would be no more Aesir Bloodshed but his words played back in her head. She looked at her son, who looked at the All-Father with a hurt expression on his face; after all this time of serving the All-Father and being bound to him by blood, he still didn't consider the Bear Cub as his grandson. Björn looked to the frozen ground as Thrud walked over to him and placed her hand on his shoulder, making him look at her.

"You're still my brother." Thrud said as she hugged Björn, who hugged her back much to Loki's displeasure. Sif looked at Thor, who stood off to the side when his father arrived and walked over to him.

"Can't you see what's happening? He's not protecting us." Sif placed her hand on his husband's chest, "Magni. Modi. Our Boys... We used to tell them stories by the fire, do you remember? We would carve those wooden horses. We would play and laugh until the sun sank and they fell asleep in our laps. They were thrown at the All-Father's Problems like brittle knives to a mountain face. And for what? They were able to share their blood with someone they considered a brother and we love him like a son - Björn, our little bear cub. He's been through so much because of Loki and his father and he came to us. If this keeps up, He, Revna, or Thrud could be next. I don't want to lose another son or my daughters."

Thor said nothing as he slowly took Sif's smaller hand into his own and gently kissed her knuckles before he glared at Loki with his icy blue eyes. He was about to pull Mjolnir from his holster when another hand touched his, he looked at saw Björn and Thrud standing beside him - his whole family was there for him.

"Father... Please. No more fighting right now. Losing Lord Heimdall was enough and I don't want you to get hurt. The All-Father will get his mask and I'll help him see through the rift, then maybe he'll see me as his Grandson but if you attack Loki, something bad will happen. I know it." Björn begged with his eyes, Thor nodded and removed his hand from his hammer when the sound of stone gathering got everyone's attention.

A pile of rocks stood up and took the form of a doorway before a light shone through the threshold and a familiar figure walked through. The familiar marking on the man's body caused Björn's breath to get caught in his throat.

"The Ghost." Björn whispered.

"What are you doing here, Father?" Loki asked as he walked over to him with the ask in hand but Kratos just looked at Björn who shivered in fear and hid behind Thor, who took his hammer into his hand and Thrud pulled out her swords in defense position.

"Boy." Kratos called to Björn but the boy didn't move, "Come to your father, Boy. You've been with the Aesir long enough."

"No. The Aesir are my family now, I'll never come back to you or your son, Ghost of Sparta." Björn said but fear was in his words.

"You will. You and the girl will come back to us and I shall make sure you never leave the house again." The Ghost said as he pulled his Axe from his back and Loki placed the Mask on his hip and pulled his bow out with an arrow.

Björn walked from behind Thor and stood in between the two Groups with his arms out.

"No. No more fighting. It doesn't have to be like this. Loki and his father will leave and we won't have to see them again. Give me the mask, Loki." Björn said but as soon as he turned his head to face Loki and his Father, an ashy grey hand was mashed in his face and pushed him with great force, sending him flying until his head collided with the icy wall, making him blackout as his body slumped to the ground.

"Björn!" Sif said as she ran over to her son and placed his hand on his head, instantly pulling away when something wet touched her hand, it was blood. Björn's Blood.

"Sif, get our son out of here!" Thor yelled as he charged at Kratos who clashed his axe with Mjolnir. Sif called the ravens to teleport away but Loki was running at her, but Thrud got in his way, allowing Sif to get away with her injured son in her hands.

[Unknown Amount of Time Later]

“AH! THRÚD, FATHER CAREFUL!!!” Björn called out as he jumped up and held his arm out but his hand touched nothing - in fact, he wasn't in Niflheim anymore. He was in his room in Asgard. There was a bandage on his head and he looked around when the door opened, Thor along with Thrud walked in with bandages of their own.

"Father! Thrud! What happened to you?" Björn asked as he got out of bed and walked over to them.

"You took a blow to the head and you're worried about us, Little Bear Cub? How kind of you" Thrud smiled at her brother. "But to answer your question, Father fought with the Ghost again and I fought against Loki but they got away when the All-Father got in between our battle. Loki managed to get away with the mask though."

"Damn, I was hoping there was no need for a battle. Sorry, Father, Thrud." Björn looked at the ground but Thor's hand on his shoulder made him look up at him.

"It wasn't your fault, Björn. I know that you were still scared of the host and I didn't expect you to get over that fear just yet but with more training, I know that you will get through this. We'll help you." Thor smiled at his son as Björn hugged his father and Thrud joined in just to be there for her brother - she knew Björn was n fear for his life when he saw Kratos again and she was going to help her brother get over that fear soon.

[psalacanthea]

WiP Whenever

Thanks @oxygenforthewicked for the tag!  A little of the Baldur’s Gate 3 fic!  A vampire and a pathological liar of a bard stop fighting just long enough to out themselves as total idiots who have no idea what they’re talking about.

...

“Tell me a secret,” Astarion demanded, head shifting from her breast to a more comfortable spot against her shoulder.

Zyn huffed a sigh.  “What?  No.”

“You said I get whatever I want right now, and I want you to tell me a secret.”

“Well, I can’t decide what sort of secret to tell,” she dismissed, dragging a knuckle along the line of his exquisite cheekbone.  “You’ll have to be more specific.”

He tilted his chin up, catching her forefinger in his teeth.  Just a hint of painful pressure, his fangs barely breaking the skin as his eyes rolled up to meet hers.  Reaching up, he caught her hand in a courtly gesture as he released the bite, clutching her fingertips as he licked a bead of blood from her knuckle.  His scarlet eyes stared into hers, arresting.

“Have you ever been in love?”

Amused and rather seduced, she couldn’t find it in her to resist him.  “Oh, that’s not a secret.  Once,” she admitted fondly.  “She was…so beautiful.”  The memories drew a sigh from her heart, dark tousled curls and soulful hazel eyes.  The kind of eyes that could speak whole verses of poetry without saying a word.  “Her name was Melia.  She was an innkeeper.  Owned a place outside of Amn called the Blue Lark Inn.  It’s long gone.”

“What was she like?”

Idly she stroked through his silver locks, letting the half-curls twist around her fingers.  “Sweet and rich, like good honey.  Sharp and sardonic wit, but with a gentleness to her.  Like a bright flower with razor leaves.  Sunshine and thistles.  She could…walk down a street and find beauty in a dozen things you hadn’t even noticed.  The slant of light through a fence, a delicate plant growing out of a crack, the sound of snowmelt dripping.  And when she showed it to you…you could suddenly see the beauty, too.”  Zyn’s voice thickened with nostalgia.  “She lived her life with her eyes open.  The sunlight to my darkness.”

“What happened to her?”

Zyn smiled, feeling it crack at the edges.  “I don’t know.  One day I stopped there in my wandering, and…she’d sold the inn.  She was gone.  Without even a word, without waiting for me– she didn’t even leave a letter.  The only time I’ve been in love, and the only time I’ve had my heart broken.”

Astarion laughed with delighted mockery, toying with her fingers.  “You are so positively cold-blooded!”

“What?  I confess my broken heart and get called cold for it?  The one solitary painful wound upon my heart that aches still on melancholy nights, and you laugh at it?  That’s harsh.”  She scowled and shook him free of her hand, pushing his face away when he tried to bite her fingertip in retaliation.

Astarion turned over, resting his chin on her shoulder, finger stroking down her throat.  “I’m harsh?  Really?  Tell me, how long had you been gone from her side?”

Zyn frowned, well aware of what he was implying.  “It doesn’t really matter, does it?  I wrote often enough.  If love can’t survive distance, then it’s not love, is it?”

“If you love something, you want to keep it by your side,” he contradicted her lazily.

“As if you would know of love.”  She stared down at the top of his head, letting his hair slide between her fingers.  “Love means accepting someone for who they are.  We choose who we love, and so we have to choose the person for who they are and not who we would rather they be.”

“We choose who we love?”  Astarion asked, laughing mockingly.  “Hardly.  Hmh.”  He paused, smirked, and then decided, “you really are cold-blooded.”

“I don’t even understand what you’re talking about,” she grumped, tilting her chin down into his hand as he reached for her.  A gentle grip.  She accepted the lazy kiss he offered her until she had to dodge his attempt to bite her lower lip, pressing her finger to his nose in warning.

He smirked at her, reaching up and catching her by that finger.  She let him kiss the palm of her hand, despite half expecting him to bite her again.  His voice softened, musing and slow. “Love is…a glorious imposition.  A single-minded fire that burns away everything in its wake.  A dangerous dependency, a consuming passion.  Love is…”  He smiled, but there was an edge of something hard and bitter in the curve of his lips.  “Dangerous.”

“That’s not love,” she dismissed.  “That’s fascination.  Lust.  Infatuation.  Obsession, maybe…but certainly not love.”

“We are the two worst possible people to be having this debate,” he decided, his attempt to kiss her neck interrupted by her palm.  He frowned against it, and then pursed his lips in a kiss.  “You’re very rude,” he said, muffled.

“Stop being a mosquito.”