#sunshine-rainbows-pluto

[pearlprincess02]

1st house synastry playlist

mirrored vibes - 1st house synastry (playlist) / inner planets / asteroids

for when their jupiter is in your first house:

"good vibrations" - the beach boys / "happy" - pharrell williams / "ain't no mountain high enough" - marvin gaye & tammi terrell / "beautiful day" - U2 / "can't stop the feeling!" - justin timberlake /

for when your jupiter is in their first house:

"higher love" - steve winwood / "you raise me up" - josh groban / "firework" - katy perry / "can't hold us" - macklemore & ryan lewis / "hey soul sister" - train /

for when their saturn is in your first house:

"beautiful boy (darling boy)" - john lennon / "diamonds" - rihanna / "the scientist" - coldplay / "stronger (what doesn't kill you)" - kelly clarkson / "i will survive" - gloria gaynor /

for when your saturn is in their first house:

"the sound of silence" - simon & garfunkel / "say you won't let go" - james arthur / "someone you loved" - lewis capaldi / "best song ever" - one direction / "i'll stand by you" - the pretenders /

for when their uranus is in your first house:

"like a prayer" - madonna / "rebel yell" - billy idol / "electric feel" - mgmt / "blue suede shoes" - elvis presley / "don't stop believin'" - journey

for when your uranus is in their first house:

"power" - kanye west / "walking on sunshine" - katrina & the waves / "changes" - david bowie / "born this way" - lady gaga / "run the world (girls)" - beyoncé /

for when their neptune is in your first house:

"wish you were here" - pink floyd / "clair de lune" - claude debussy / "dreams" - fleetwood mac / "across the universe" - the beatles / "my immortal" - evanescence /

for when your neptune is in their first house:

"連れてって 連れてって" - dreams come true / "what the world needs now is love" - andra day / "imagine" - john lennon / "somewhere over the rainbow" - judy garland / "chasing pavements" - adele /

for when their pluto is in your first house:

"before he cheats" - carrie underwood / "runnin' on empty" - jackson browne / "carry on wayward son" - kansas / "holocene" - bon iver / "decode" - paramore /

for when your pluto is in their first house:

"secret" - the pierces / "heartbreaker" - pat benatar / "higher love" - kygo & whitney houston / "gives you hell" - all time low / "story of us" - taylor swift /

@pearlprincess02

main masterlist

[expired-crow]

Another headcanon of mine is that the deans sometimes let them visit each others dorms (A.K.A. sleepovers) and each group has a different way of spending it. ~

Annabel: We have to start planning ahead. Lenore and her friends are beginning to gain the upper hand.

Prospero: I agree, we need to work together on this.

Montresor: Sure! What do yall got in mind?

Ada: I think we should get rid of one of them. Perhaps a certain French man.

Annabel: That isn't a bad idea love.

Will: Hey guys... do you hear that?

~

Meanwhile with the Misfits...

Berenice: YOU LYING BASTARD! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS?!

Duke: ME?! YOU'RE THE ONE CHEATING!

Berenice: I TRUSTED YOU AND YOU DO THIS!

Duke: WELL WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD! EVERYTHING ISN'T SUNSHINES AND RAINBOWS!

Berenice: OH YOU WANT TO FIGHT?!

Duke: YEAH WHY NOT? COME AT ME!

Morella: Guys stop! You going to get us in trouble.

Lenore: Why don't we stop playing monopoly for a while...

Pluto: I'm betting on Duke.

Eulalie: Well I'm betting on Berenice.

[seafoamreadings]

week of july 21st, 2024

these are written predominantly for the *rising* signs but they are also intuitively "channeled" enough that they should work for any dominant energy you have! (try your sun if you don't know rising, or more advanced readers can try moon, anywhere you have a stellium, etc and see what works best for you!)

aries: your ruling planet mars breaks away from his much hyped and anticipated uranus conjunction last week just to trine pluto. it's scary planets but they're in a nice aspect; you win in power struggles as long as you act from justice. then he moves on to sextile the sun later in the week which can be a fantastic little energy boost if everything else has run you perhaps a bit ragged.

taurus: early in the week expect wires to be inconveniently crossed when it comes to communication or thinking. by the end of the week it's considerably better, although mercury is in the "shadow" of its retrograde (coming up), and behind the scenes you also get some kindly benefic boosts from venus and jupiter in the form of resources (or resourcefulness).

gemini: mercury oscillates between being difficult and being quite pleasant. but he is already in the pre-retrograde phase, which will affect you more than most. these are the last couple weeks before the proper retrograde season so be sure to tie up any loose ends you have going on.

cancerians: the sun makes a few pretty dramatic aspects here at the end of cancer season. some are "good" and some are "hard" but all of it is just what you make of it. this is a precipice time, which may not be your favorite, being that you love security so much as you do. but if nothing ever changes, nothing ever happens. even you would get bored.

leo: it's no secret that leo (like all the fixed signs) loves their own season. this week, your ruling planet the sun comes home to your sign and kicks off the festivities. but this comes with an intense neptune trine as well as a tense pluto opposition. it's not all rainbows and sunshine, even with the sun so center-stage. but that doesn't mean the rainbows and sunshine disappear! enjoy them even if you have a few roadblocks this week.

virgo: mercury is making its way into your sign. even if you, like i do, take ceres to be your true ruler, mercury is probably exalted in your sign. there's no way around it, the upcoming retrograde hits you harder than most. cover your bases now so that life is easier throughout august.

libra: you are of course a paragon of balance and poise any time at all, but this week especially, while the rest of the world is still recovering from and integrating the recent hard transits, you are (or at least appear to others to be) practically unaffected. it makes you attractive to those who need help, and it's good to help them, but don't let anyone be a vampire to you. you first.

scorpio: any relationship weirdness is still in the process of settling. it may take some time. it's not meant to be traditional, easy, or simple. and you're such a creature of the depth that you wouldn't be satisfied or fulfilled if it was, anyway.

sagittarius: although things seem to be getting less serene every day, it many ways it suits you. it's not that you love tumult, it's just that complete serenity bores you. this is all part of your experience as an incarnate being. so enjoy the increased passionate fire vibes and be sure not to spend any time wallowing in self pity, even if that's what your friends want to do.

capricorn: pluto rests just outside your sign, a hair's breadth away. you are really accustomed to his influence after the last couple of decades. but that is a quite uncomfortable position, as he is heading back for your sign and agitated by malefic mars as well as the sun this week. you may have flashbacks from recent years, or you may feel aggravation around self worth or financially net worth or similar themes. it's temporary. breathe in, breathe out, do what is to be done next.

aquarius: yes, the mars-uranus conjunction is fading out. but mercury still makes a square with that taurean uranus. this can aggravate any 'situations' you have ongoing with live-in partners, family opinions of a relationship, and so on. you get to want what you want, and do what you want. but it may be good to consider (not bow to!) the feelings of others in this process.

pisces: it's a hazily magical period. others have to squint to see it or they only catch glimpses in their dreams maybe, but you know it's there. like you can see two or three layers of reality at once.

[ffiahh]

PROJECT PLUTO

Please Don't Leave Me.

A journey on Vi learning how to accept and give affection again.

Pairings: Modern!Touch-Starved!Sub!Bottom! Vi x Masc!POC!Dom!Top!RugbyPlayer!OC! Aspen

Content Warning: Brief self-deprecating thoughts, cursing, brief mention of sexual harassment/assault, description of brief panic attack/meltdown, self-doubt, brief mention of death/dying (no one died). SMUT WARNING: choking/gagging (fingers), fingering, face-sitting, tribbing, description of spit, power play, praise, orgasm denial, back scratching, slight description of overstimulation, dirty talk, aftercare.

Word Count: 6.9K

☾*:･ﾟ✧. Now, now, don't look at the word count and get discouraged, that also applies to the x reader being x OC. Being top/bottom and Sub/Dom, are not the same, top/bottom determines whether you 'receive it' or not, and Dom/Sub determines control; you can be a Dom and also be a bottom; thought I would clarify. OC has vitiligo, not the focal point of the plot, but Vi likes looking at them. I know shit all about rugby, I just really like looking at hot, muscly, sweaty ladies wrestle each other for a ball. Vi is really fucking cute in here, I liked writing her in this.

VIOLET loved affection; she loved it in any form she could get. She sought out anyone’s love language and adapted; gave them affection the way they wanted it. She always made sure she had a comforting hand on those she cared about, made sure they felt safe. Powder was one of them; the way she looked up at Vi with her large eyes, leaning into her hand, with the softest, gentlest smile. For someone who had a heavy hand; well-versed in the art of violence; Vi was incredibly gentle, loving. Violet craved just as much affection, loved the way Powder always reached up on her tiptoes to encase her in a hug so warm; it would almost burn her insides. She loved the way little Ekko would almost always jump on his feet to hug Vi. Vi was a gentle soul with a good heart.   

It was a lot more difficult now.  

Prison was a shitty place. It was dark, and cold and hard. Literally. Vi took more beatings than she had food. It was shitty enough for Vi to finally understand to keep her hands to only fighting; nobody in prison wanted to fucking cuddle. Cuddling was absent in prison; kissing wasn’t a thing and sex was something forced. Vi of course knew going to prison wasn’t sunshine and rainbows; it was horrible, and traumatic and would always follow her. It burns into the back of her brain, fizzing in front of her eyes whenever she lets her mind talk. So, the touch of a gentle hand felt foreign to her now, a mere distant memory; Vi craved it though, she had to scold herself to keep her hands in her pockets whenever she talked to Ekko, whenever she could even get the chance to speak to… Jinx; they were old now, a hollow shell of what’s left of their childhood; they didn’t snuggle into her hugs anymore, didn’t rely on the strength of her hands to let their heads rest in her palms. Whose fault is that? You stupid bitch.  

Violet hates affection now. She doesn’t know who to give it to, she doesn’t know who to ask it from. Violet was unsure if she would enjoy it now, if it would feel different because she maybe grew out of the affectionate person she was; all because she was trying to survive. Violet has other things to worry about; like getting Powder back, or worrying if someone was going to attack her. Vi had to look over her shoulder, she never stopped but somehow it felt more daunting doing it all alone. Violet was an adult; it was time she started acting like one.

Aspen changed that though, she bulldozed her way through with that stupid, cocky smirk, with her insane, towering height and impressive build. Vi reluctantly let her through; Aspen was persistent and annoying, she tells herself that; but secretly enjoys the way Aspen so effortlessly flirts with her, or the way she could see Aspen’s dark eyes, and smouldering gaze wash over her figure. It was refreshing, and Aspen was funny. 

Meeting Aspen for the first time felt like a ton of bricks fell down her head and through her body. Aspen was annoying, never stopped flirting with her and was never embarrassed about admiring Vi.

Vi remembered the day she walked into the Last Drop; she had just gotten out of prison; and somehow, Vi felt no ounce of feeling. Hollow maybe was the right word, there but not there. Zaun was here, Ekko was, Jinx as well, but Powder was gone, Vi could barely remember what Mylo and Claggor looked like; and she saw Vander in that large statue every time she walked through Zaun. It was surreal being back in Zaun after so many years, everything was the way it had been when she left, but she felt unfamiliar; like as if she would get pelted by rocks until she was forced to leave. It was her home, but it was cold.

Vi was thankful for her hood, she could easily slip into the bar without gaining any sort of attention. Vi didn’t bother looking around the Last Drop, it wasn’t her home anymore; she had no right to melt away into the familiar scent of alcohol anymore. It wasn’t her home anymore.

Vi was a taking a sip from her glass when she first felt the gaze from Aspen; she could literally feel her presence; it was large, as large as her; with her large shoulders and thick thighs that strained against the fabric of her trousers. It felt as though the bar would part per her demand, kneel in front of her just to get her approval. There was an air of authority around her, one that wafted through her and lingered behind her, much like a cologne; a deep burnt scent.

The rest of Vi’s night carried on like that, with Vi- at first- feeling wary with Aspen’s glances before it turned into something softer, and inviting. They didn’t talk that night, or the night after that, or the night after that.

“Hey.” Until one night. Vi looked up from her glass, her eyes running over the expanse of Aspen’s legs, over her exposed torso- God, those V-lines, to her face. Aspen’s face held a small smirk, one hand lazily in her pocket. “Is this seat taken?”

Vi seemingly flushed by Aspen’s sheer, demanding presence and insane beauty just nodded as she scooted over the booth, allowing space for Aspen to sit.

“I haven’t seen you around from here. Just moved?”

This is my home. “Yup. Came from a land far away from here.”

Vi quickly realises that she has a big mouth, with no fear to speak her mind. And that her name is Aspen.  

“You’re pretty, does someone have you?”

Vi stops midway from taking her drink, her cheeks heating up as she sneaks a glance at Aspen. “No. Why? You want me?”

Aspen doesn’t answer Vi’s question, just lets her eyes flicker down Vi’s form as a smirk tugs on the corner of her mouth. “Alright.”

“Alright?”

“Alright.” Aspen repeats, she’s about to take a sip from her drink before she catches Vi’s incredulous look. “What? I can’t ask a pretty thing like you if you’re taken? Are you uncomfortable?”

Vi blinks up at Aspen, she was expecting a taunting tone from Aspen’s second question, but just gets a lilt of genuine concern in Aspen’s voice, and a slight furrow of her eyebrows on her otherwise playful face. Vi snaps out of her daze, with a small shake of her head. “You just didn’t answer my question.”

Aspen just smirks again, that same lazy one that’s lopsided and sexy. “Okay.”

“Hey, Bubblegum.” 

Vi rolled her eyes, taking a sip from her drink as she sneaked a glance at Aspen from the corner of her eyes. The purple neon lights of the bar washed over Aspen’s skin; the way it brightened the lighter patches and the way it seemed to melt into the rest of her darker skin. Always so beautiful. “Stop calling me that.” 

Aspen lets out a playful scoff, taking a seat on the booth next to her. “Only if you stop dying your hair red. Besides, it suits you.” 

Vi scoffs quietly, rolling her eyes. “How? And don’t say my hair.” 

Aspen smirks from behind her glass, the corner of her lip pulling up, before her eyes trail down Vi’s form. “Definitely not cause of your bubble butt.” 

Vi can feel her cheeks heat up, she takes another gulp from her glass. “I don’t-” Vi trails off, her eyes washing over Aspen’s face; the arch of her nose; the way her nose ring shimmered under the light, the odd splotches of white on her otherwise dark skin, or the way her dark hair looks so thick even with an undercut. Vi greedily lets her gaze wander over Aspen’s form; her broad shoulders, or the relaxed abs, or the happy trail peeking from her trou-

“You checking me out, baby?” 

Vi blushes, turning her head. She hopes the dark lighting and the colour of her drink hides her red cheeks. “No.” Shit, Vi. You answered too fast and you couldn't keep your eyes to yourself. 

“No?” Vi could hear the tease in Aspen’s voice, she could feel Aspen’s eyes on her. “I don’t mind. I want your pretty eyes on me.” 

Well, fuck. 

Vi could only take another sip from her drink, swirling the alcohol in her glass, before she puffs her cheeks out in embarrassment. “Well- it was just- you-” Vi ends up sighing, drinking the last of her drink before placing it on the table. 

Aspen only hummed; her eyes flitting down Vi’s form again with a smirk, before she lets her head hang backwards, leaning back in her seat, her legs separating to find a more comfortable position as she closed her eyes. Vi’s eyes widened, her cheeks burning up again. Is she doing this on purpose? What is she- why does she look so good? “Wh-what are you doing?” 

Aspen turned her head to look at Vi, her dark gaze once again washing over her form. “Relaxing. Why?” 

Vi shrugs, leaning back in her seat as she takes the courage to look at Aspen. “You’re just usually so loud and annoying.”

Aspen lets out a short laugh, revealing a set of white, almost crooked teeth. “Very funny. Just tired, sweetheart.” Aspen lets out another long sigh, settling back into the booth chair. “Rugby’s been kicking my ass.” 

“Wh-” Hot. “You play rugby? That definitely explains the physique.” 

Aspen smirks, her eyes opening slightly. “Knew it. You were definitely checking me out.” 

Vi blushes again, averting her eyes. “Shut up.”

“You want to come to my rugby match? You can see more of my hot, sweaty muscles.” 

And die at the scene of Aspen’s hot, muscled body straining as she tackles other players? No, thank you. “Yes.” Fuck.

Dearly Beloved, we are gathered here today to celebrate the short life of Vi: ex-convict, anarchist and raging fucking lesbian.

Vi should have disagreed, she should have put her foot down and told Aspen she would be busy clipping her nails. Vi was stuck in a crowd full of loud, angry rugby fans, the wind was cold; nipping her ears and nose, and some stupid kid was kicking the back of her chair. The worst part? Vi could see the way Aspen looked; dressed in her uniform; the short sleeves hugging the curves of her biceps. She saw everything. The way Aspen’s hair flew around her face in her ponytail; the way her thick, dark eyebrows furrowed in concentration and the oh so wonderful sight of Aspen’s muscles contracting whenever she effortlessly tackled another player. The worse worst part? Vi was sitting in front of row.

Vi didn’t know anything about rugby, she just knew how much it affected her to see Aspen play the sport. The Gods hated her apparently, because it seems as though Aspen was popular among the crowd; her face showing up on the large screen from time to time. Vi didn’t think she was good with eye contact, it was a vulnerable feeling; it was awkward, but with Aspen it was easy; like breathing. Vi soon looked away though, glad that the cold air can be an excuse for her red cheeks, and even in the cool air; her whole body burned with Aspen’s gaze washing over her, her stupid smirk falling into a concentrated stare before Vi could even stare at it. The crowd didn’t mind watching her move across the field, getting a little louder every time she showed up; and for whatever reason that irked Vi.

Aspen’s team won, and somehow Vi found herself with Aspen and her friends in a restaurant. Aspen had asked her so sweetly, and Vi was tired, worn out, but she didn’t have the heart to refuse Aspen. Aspen’s friends were loud, much louder than Aspen; and it rung in her ears a little, but Vi could at least zone out as she snuck glances at Aspen’s tattoo that ran in between her breasts; it was a simple one: the life cycle of the moon, but it enhanced Aspen’s beauty, melted well with the rest of her mismatched skin that Vi’s own tattoos couldn’t compare.  

The next thing Vi gave her attention to was well-deserved too; it was the soft tuft of dark hair that hung from Aspen’s belly button, through the faint lines of Aspen’s muscled abdomen and disappeared into the band of her trousers. Vi could only thank Aspen’s choice to wear a shirt that was split open in the middle, tucked into her trousers; showing the curve of her breasts.

Vi sneaked a glance at Aspen, who was weirdly quiet. Her eyebrows were drawn in; not in the way she looked when playing rugby, but in the way that it also pulled her top lip into a subtle snarl. Aspen’s jaw was locking, as she grinded her teeth together so hard, Vi could almost hear it.

Aspen was jealous, because Vi realised that one of Aspen’s friend had taken a liking to Vi. She would have felt flattered or embarrassed that somebody liked her enough to give her glances, but it was amusing to see Aspen so possessive over someone she hasn't even got.

“I need to use the bathroom.” Vi announced, stepping up from her seat, a few of them acknowledged Vi, so she left without another word. Vi didn't bother to acknowledge the gaze that Aspen had on her until the bathroom door closed behind her. She could almost feel it burn a hole in her back.

Vi was washing her hands when the bathroom door opened, she only looked up briefly before she looked down to dry off her hands. “Need to tinkle, Aspen?”

“No.” Aspen felt much closer, Vi had barely any room to turn. She said nothing as she rested against the sink, her arms crossed over her chest as she looked up at Aspen.

“What?” Vi didn't feel nervous, though she could hear feel her heart pounding in her chest at the close proximity of Aspen. Vi breathed in through her nose once and concluded she smelt like burnt wood.

Aspen’s eyes trailed over Vi’s face, creating a map of her most favourite points on Vi’s face; her bent bridge, her large puppy dog eyes; the scar running through her top lip and eyebrow. Aspen wanted to kiss it all. “I want to kiss you so bad.”

Vi didn't need to strain her ears to catch what Aspen was saying, it flew from Aspen’s mouth easily, like as if she had been saying it out loud over and over again. She just fluttered her eyes, letting out a brief sigh and small nod.

Vi didn't stop her when Aspen caught her lips with her own, she definitely didn't stop her when her fingers dug into Vi’s waist. Vi could feel Aspen’s chest press into hers, she could feel the edge of the sink digging into her back, but Vi could only reach up to claw her fingers at Aspen’s neck, hoping to bring her closer. Their kiss was crazy, and rushed. It was loud and wet, and put Vi into a daze where nothing but small whimpers came from her mouth.

Everything around them was a blur as they moulded their mouths together and when Aspen let go with a small ‘pop’, her chest raising and falling rapidly as she sucked in sharp breaths, Vi had to stop herself from leaning on her feet to reach Aspen’s mouth again. Vi could feel her own chest moving to let more air in, and could feel the pad of Aspen’s thumb run across Vi’s lips.

“Are you comfortable enough for me to take you home?”

Vi felt like a bobble head, nodding as she tried to keep her hands around the edge of the sink. She's touched Aspen enough.

Aspen didn’t feel like it was enough; she caught Vi’s lips with her own again; pressing her body unbelievably closer to Vi’s. She could feel Aspen’s hands claw at Vi’s shirt, almost as if she wanted to undress her here; in the dingy bathroom at the equally dingy restaurant.

It wasn’t long until Aspen was guiding Vi out of the bathroom, her hand placed on the small of her back; dangerously close to the curve of Vi’s ass. Aspen didn’t bother bidding bye to her friends, only gives Vi an eager kiss, and when she reaches up to try and smack Aspen’s shoulder in hopes of living through her embarrassment; which didn’t work because Aspen’s friends only cheered on; where the rest of the patrons in the restaurant could only look on in distaste.

Things got calmer when they reached Aspen’s house, and by the time Aspen had taken her to her bedroom; Vi suddenly found the patterns on Aspen’s blanket interesting, she was feeling doubtful and nervous, Aspen could see that; as much as she liked looking at Vi when she couldn’t hold eye contact; she could see it. Aspen crouches by the bed, her hands resting on Vi’s knees.

“What’s wrong?”

Vi just shrugs, still refusing to look at Aspen; she’s glad that her hair’s covering her face. She felt stupid, so stupid that she eagerly agreed to come back here, only to not follow through with it. It felt like a promise broken, and yet Vi was determined to fulfill.

“You nervous?”

Vi purses her lips, puffing her cheeks out slightly before she shakes her head. Vi blows out a short breath from her mouth. “Why would I be nervous?”

“Could be anything. We don’t have to do anything-”

“I want to! It just-” Vi sighs, she can feel her heart thundering in her chest; her mouth felt dry and her eyes felt too watery. Vi closed her eyes tight, pursing her lips as she looks away. “I haven’t had a-a normal human interaction since- when- since before I got arrested. I-It- it was- it was my fault. I led everybody to that stupid apartment, we-we just wanted to find some things to steal, and- and it went wrong-”

“Okay, hey.” Aspen reaches out her hands to hold Vi’s face, squeezing her cheeks; letting her thumbs run over the bridge of her nose and her cheek. “Take deep breaths for me, okay?”

Vi swallowed deeply; her lips trembling as she let her eyes trail over Aspen’s face. Her heart was still beating against her ribcage; she could almost see the curves and jumps it made across her chest; it thundered throughout her whole body.

“Okay.”

“When was this?”

Vi was quiet as she racked her mind for an answer, she didn’t get distracted by the open view of Aspen’s torso under her open shirt. She was starting to remember everything now; and wanted to bury it all again. Vi could only let her head rest heavily against Aspen, when she chose to sit on the bed next to Vi. “Seven years... I think?” 

“Seven- that was- you were kid then. For something as petty as theft? That was not your fault, and you shouldn’t have gone through that, okay?”

“Okay.” Vi didn’t believe her.

They ended up not having sex, they just curled around each other as they slept through the night. Vi didn’t mind; Aspen was warm; even if she did sleep shirtless; her skin warmed up quickly. Aspen certainly didn’t mind; she like the feeling of holding Vi to her chest as she slept.

Vi woke up; feeling warm; enveloping her back and chest, and realised it was the closeness of Aspen pressed against her back, and the weight of her heavy forearm wrapped around Vi’s shoulders and a firm hold on her waist; Vi was literally caged in, so she didn’t bother moving. Vi stayed quiet as she ran the tip of her nose across Aspen’s arm, feeling the sparse hair tickling her face. She stayed like that; her face buried in Aspen’s forearm, under the golden glow of the sun swimming through the room. It felt like the morning after sex, except Vi’s body didn’t feel sore and Aspen hadn’t touched her at all.

Soon the hand wrapped around her hip twitched, followed by a momentary squeeze around her body before Aspen let go; stretching her limbs with a quiet groan. Aspen soon settled back in, her arms finding home again around Vi’s body. “Have you been awake long?”

Vi nearly shuddered at Aspen’s voice, it was gravelly and deep; the kind that scratched at the back of the throat. “Not long.”

Aspen hummed, before she rolled over to get out of bed, leaving Vi to recoil at the absence of her touch. “You wanna take a shower?”

Vi looked up at Aspen; who was shuffling through her wardrobe. Vi’s mind momentarily stopped at the sight of Aspen’s back and shoulder muscles, contracting as she moved. Thank you, rugby. “You telling me I stink?”

Aspen laughed, standing up with a towel and a change of clothes for Vi. “No, of course not, baby. I like your natural musk.” Aspen teased.

Having a shower made Vi feel better, her body felt cooler; her muscles were more relaxed. Aspen’s shirt on her just about fit, hanging over her broad shoulders and stopping just below her hips. Her trousers fit her better, Aspen insisted it was because of her ‘bubble butt’.

Aspen soon walked out a towel wrapped around her waist, her chest out on display as she used a smaller towel to dry her hair. Vi didn’t feel embarrassed at her exposed torso; privacy was a gift in prison. Her eyes kept wandering back to Aspen’s pierced nipples; the pretty golden hearts; melted well against Aspen’s mismatched skin. Vi wasn’t ashamed to keep staring when Aspen’s towel falls to the floor; her eyes trailing over the curve of Aspen’s well sculpted ass, the corded muscles in her back and the way her thighs flexed when she put her tracksuit bottoms on.

Vi sighs, leaning back on her hands on the bed as she stared at Aspen. “Do you not want to have sex with me?”

Aspen stops tying the drawstring on her tracksuit bottoms as she looks up at Vi; her dark eyebrows were furrowed before her face softens as she lets her hands fall to her sides. “Only if you’re ready. Are you ready?”

“Thought I was last night.”

“You nearly had a breakdown, Vi. You weren’t in the right headspace; I would never take advantage of you like that.”

Vi was quiet, as she bites the inside of her mouth. She looks away when Aspen lazily saunters over to Vi; puffing her cheeks out.

Aspen lets out a quiet laugh; her fingers squeezing Vi’s chin, before they slide up to Vi’s jaw. “Why are you pouting?”

Vi huffs, subconsciously leaning into Aspen’s hand, failing to keep her eye roll contained. “Am not.”

“Now, you’re being a brat.” Aspen warns, her thumb digging into the side of Vi’s jaw, before they slide over Vi’s mouth, tracing the divot of her scar. “Want me to fuck you, Bubblegum?”

Vi swallowed thickly, her lips parting to form a sentence before it gets stuck in her throat. Her mind had left her body as she can only stare up at Aspen, it was hazy and Aspen wasn’t even doing anything. She stood over Vi with that imposing height, and that lazy grin.

“Hmm?” Aspen’s hand doesn’t let go of Vi’s jaw, her other hand slipping into the pocket of her tracksuit bottoms, as she stared down at Vi. When Vi doesn’t answer, Aspen merely chuckles; her forefinger and thumb gently pinching Vi’s bottom lip, pulling on it slightly. “Quite the sight. Lovely angle.”

Vi averts her eyes, feeling the heat seep into her cheeks; that was mistake as the only thing she could see was the faint ridges of Aspen’s abs, dusted with a trail of hair hanging from her bellybutton. Vi let her eyes dart over the various milky puddles on Aspen’s brown skin, before her breath hitched at Aspen’s command.

“Open your mouth, sweet thing. Tongue out.”

Vi listens, letting her lips part as her tongue rolls out. She can feel her heart thunder in her chest, as she anxiously waits for whatever comes next. Vi realised she quite liked this scenario; liked the way Aspen had a hold on her figuratively and literally. Perhaps, it was the rush of adrenaline or the excitement of doing something other than surviving. She felt grounded and she felt safe.  

She swallowed thickly when the weighted feeling of Aspen’s fingers sat on her tongue; Vi listened before Aspen had opened her mouth, closing her lips around her fingers; swirling her tongue over Aspen’s rough pads of her fingers.

“Good girl.” Aspen coos, her lip curling up as she hears a small, quiet sound from the back of Vi’s throat; something akin to a hum and whimper. Aspen doesn’t bother moving, just tilts her head as she stares down at Vi; the way her large eyes blinked up at Aspen. “Feel good?”

Vi just blinked blearily up at Aspen, a quiet whine spilling past her mouth; as she sucked harder on Aspen’s fingers. Vi didn’t feel embarrassed; she didn’t really have time to feel it, just very, very eager to please Aspen; and if that meant letting Aspen stuff her fingers down her throat, then so be it. Vi hummed around Aspen’s fingers, squirming slightly on her seat on the edge of the bed: she could feel the tips of Aspen’s fingers slide closer to the back of her mouth; it was so slow that Vi nearly didn’t catch it.

Vi whined again; her mouth widening slightly as tears sprung her eyes; she felt the urge to gag; her fingers quickly finding Aspen’s forearm, tightening around the muscles. Aspen’s fingers were so far down her mouth; it probably should have come out from the back of Vi’s neck.

“Breathe, baby. Through your nose. You can do it, pretty girl.”

Vi felt her skin heat up at the praise, as well as the familiar tingle up her spine. She listened, taking deep breaths through her nose, before the weight of Aspen’s fingers felt lighter. Vi didn’t think she’d enjoy this power play; but she definitely felt her boxers soak through, she might as well be sitting in a puddle of her own cum.    

Aspen still didn’t let go when strings of saliva fell from Vi’s mouth; and down Aspen’s hand. Aspen merely spared it a glance before they slid up to Vi again. In Aspen’s eyes, Vi looked divine; the way her grey eyes seemed larger, softer; almost as if she’d fall into a deep sleep, just by looking at Aspen. Maybe it the sight of Vi submitting so easily, even with the witty and snarky exterior, or perhaps Aspen just liked looking at the curves and sharp ridges of Vi’s muscles throughout her body; especially at this angle.

Aspen cooed, when she felt Vi’s mouth tighten around her fingers with a strangled whine. “I know, I know, it's messy. But you're doing so well for me.” Vi couldn't help but follow Aspen with her eyes, her mouth not letting go of Aspen’s fingers, as Aspen found a seat behind Vi. “You’re a good girl for me, aren’t you?”

Vi let out a tiny gasp, as Aspen’s fingers suddenly disappeared from her mouth. “Yeah.” Vi could only pant, placing a hand on her chest to calm her racing heart; she could feel some wet patches of her trousers, and could feel the sticky dried spit down her chin.

Vi leaned back into Aspen’s chest, her hand clutching onto the edge of the mattress while the other tentatively rests on Aspen’s thigh, and when she got no resistance did Vi squeeze her fingers around the muscle.

Vi squirmed, feeling Aspen’s hand run over her thighs, and her warm breath hit the back of her neck and ear. “You gonna let me play with you, baby girl?”

“Fu- yeah. Yes please.”

Aspen laughed, a quiet soft sound that swam through Vi’s ears like butter. “So polite.” Aspen had to stop herself from groaning out loud, as her fingers slipped slowly into Vi’s boxers; easily slipping through her folds, Aspen could already feel the familiar sticky substance on the pads of her fingers. “Taking my fingers in your mouth excited you a bit too much, eh?”

Vi sucked in a sharp breath, biting her bottom lip as she tried to keep her hips from bucking into Aspen’s touch. “Sh-shut up.”

Aspen said nothing, but instead leans in to press a few kisses across the curve of Vi’s neck and over her shoulder. Aspen’s fingers were lazy, just running through her core and purposely missing the round nub that sat atop her pussy.

“Y-you're doing that on purpose. Fuck me better.”

Aspen laughed, her teeth sinking into the muscle on Vi’s shoulder, before licking it gently. “I wanna take my time with you. You wanna leave me that quickly?”

Vi tuts, the sound turning into a little whine when Aspen’s thumb pressed into her nub, sending a glare at Aspen when her thumb slips down her folds.

Aspen laughed again, her spare hand reaching to rest on Vi’s stomach, her fingers running over Vi’s relaxed muscles. “Needy little thing, aren't you?”

Vi huffs out, her cheeks puffing slightly as she bites the inside of her mouth. Her fingers dig into Aspen’s thigh, feeling the muscle ripple under her palm in response before she looks up to Aspen. “J-just touch me. Please.”

Aspen’s face softens, her eyebrows curling in as her mouth curls into a playful pout. “Aw, well... if you keep looking at me with those large puppy eyes...” Aspen obliges, pressing her thumb into the small nub, smiling when Vi hisses in pleasure; leaning further back into Aspen’s body.

Aspen was cruel, Vi decided. No matter how many times Vi glared up at Aspen or dug her nails harder into her leg, Aspen wouldn't let her cum; going as far moving her hand back; marvelling at the sight of Vi slowly being pulled out of her pleasured state, with a small snarl and angry curve of her eyebrows.

“Aspen! This is the 3rd time now!”

Aspen laughed at Vi’s cute glare, reaching to kiss the cute little scrunch on her broken bridge, reeling back just in time to avoid Vi’s teeth biting down on her cheek.

Vi huffs out a breath, roughly grabbing ahold of Aspen’s hand, pushing them down Vi’s boxers again, settling back down once she feels Aspen’s fingers press against her entrance.

Aspen raises an eyebrow, her hand momentarily stopping to stare at Vi with a teasing smile. “Oh?” Aspen eyebrows raises even further when Vi sits up.

Her hands hover over Vi’s hips, as she turns around in Aspen’s lap; kneeling on either side of Aspen’s thighs. Aspen looks up at Vi, the tip of her subtle fang peeking through, as she finally settles her hands on her waist. “Oh? Taking the lead are we?”

Vi lets out a grunt, her thighs shaking slightly when Aspen finally, finally slips her hands down her trousers again. Vi lets out a quiet breathless moan, cursing under her breath when Aspen’s fingers slip inside her easily. “Y-you're so annoying. Ah- sh-shit.” Vi curses under her breath again, her fingers absentmindedly clawing at Aspen’s shoulders, before she presses an eager kiss to Aspen’s mouth.

“Is that why you're fucking yourself on my fingers, baby?”

Vi doesn't say anything, just presses her forehead to Aspen’s shoulder. She can feel her thighs jerk every time Aspen’s presses into her, whining when Aspen's fingers move at a faster pace. “You better let me cum this time.” Vi can feel herself getting closer, can feel it in the way her body shook, and the way she kept pushing her hips into Aspen’s hand.

“Hm, I don't-” Aspen cut off that thought when Vi looks up, her eyebrows drawing as she glares at Aspen. “Alright! You can cum, baby. You've done so well.” Aspen coos, leaning forward to press a trail of kisses across Vi’s shoulders, pushing her shirt out of the way to carry on down her chest.

Vi orgasm- finally- hit her hard, it was easier to hold onto Aspen as she fucked her through the orgasm, and she didn't let up until Vi had to push her hand away to avoid the onslaught of overstimulation. “T-too much, Aspen.”

Vi let out a breath, letting her body fall forward into Aspen, burying her face in Aspen’s neck. “I did it.” Her voice was quiet, but Aspen heard it clearly, and made it her smile.

“Yeah, you did. So proud of you. You did so well for me.” Aspen ran her hands over Vi’s hips and thighs, as she waited for her to come down from her high, before wrapping her arms fully around Vi’s waist.

Vi let out a yelp, feeling her body fall back onto the mattress, and blinking up at the sight of Aspen leaning over her. Vi was speechless; Aspen at this angle, looked good. She liked the way her muscles tightened under her skin, and the way her dark hair created a short curtain around her face.

Vi spluttered, leaning up on her elbows when she felt Aspen tug on her trousers, pulling them down along with her boxers. “More? Are you even human?”

Aspen laughed, her thumbs slipping past the band, and sliding it down her muscled legs. “I'm a hungry man, I’ve got a taste, I want more.”

“Wh- you're not tired?”

“I'm a rugby player. I’m never tired.”

Vi ended up finding herself digging her nails into the muscled expanse of Aspen’s back, scratching them deep enough to break skin and definitely leave marks. Vi tried to keep her moans in, but they kept spilling out breathlessly; she could feel the warmth of Aspen’s pussy grinding against her own, and the embarrassing sound of squelching every time Aspen pressed against her harder. Vi dug her fingers in deeper, pulling at the skin at Aspen’s back when she felt Aspen hurl her hips higher; feeling the pressure of pleasure buzz through her.

Aspen bit her lip, closing an eye as she smirked tiredly down at Vi. “Damn, baby. You're the scratching type, huh?” Smiling wider when Vi’s eyes roll into the back of her eyes, another whine slipping past her mouth.

Vi curses under her breath, she could feel the bed creak under their weight, and the tight hold she had on Vi’s waist. She could only grunt, and lightly slap Aspen’s back. “Sh-shut up.”

Aspen speeds up a little; letting out her own moan when their clits brushed against each other, liking the way Vi’s body moved under hers, one hand reaching up to move a strand of hair from Vi’s eyes. “A slapper as well? You're gonna bite me next, sweetheart?”

Vi pants, falling back on the pillow, and hissing in pleasure. “Y-you're insufferable.” Vi felt her body shake, squeezing her eyes shut. “G-God, please like that…”

“Good girl. Stay like that for me.” Aspen laughs, and suddenly Vi can feel the heavy weight of Aspen’s hands on either side of her head. “I'm annoying, but you're begging so sweetly with that pretty mouth of yours. Who are you fooling, darling?”

“Shit.” Vi couldn't say anything else, she could only grab onto Aspen’s wrists for support. She felt incredibly sensitive, it didn't help that Aspen slowed every time she saw Vi was close to orgasming again. “Aspen, please.”

Aspen stopped, her chest heaving as she let Vi's hips gently down onto the mattress. Aspen couldn't help but run her hands over Vi’s thighs, marvelling at the sight of her muscles contracting under her touch, before her eyes slid over Vi’s body; taking in the sight of her flushed skin, and her dazed eyes. “I need you to sit on my face.”

Vi raises an eyebrow, falling out of her daze. “You're going to die. Are you crazy?”

Aspen shrugs. “Maybe I am. Send me to heaven.”

Vi could only let out a startled laugh, when she feels Aspen’s hands take hold of her hips; trying to move Vi over her face. Vi holds onto the headboard tightly, looking down at Aspen; who seems very happy at this new position. “You sure you want this?”

Aspen peeked out from under Vi’s legs, looking up at her with an incredulous look. “You know, you can at least break my nose.”

“What?”

“Come on, baby. I’ll wear it with honour. I’ll tell ‘em all that my lady did it to me.”

Vi couldn’t help but blow a raspberry in hopes it would keep her laugh in; it did not work. Her whole body shook as she laughed, and Aspen could only look on with a slight look of impatience as she stared at Vi.

Aspen opened her mouth to speak, but Vi was quick to shut her up by putting her entire weight on Aspen’s face. “Stop talking. Just- f-fuck.” Vi felt the onslaught of Aspen’s tongue quickly; feeling it run through her folds, stopping just above her clit.

Vi’s thighs trembled over Aspen, her fingers digging into the wood of the headboard, while she reaches with her other hand to knead her breast. Aspen liked that view, moaning into Vi’s cunt, as her fingers reached to sink into her own cunt.

Vi gasped out a moan, feeling Aspen’s tongue stretch her entrance slightly as her nose dug into her clit. She couldn’t help but grind herself further into Aspen’s mouth; instantly whining when Aspen wraps her lips around her clit, sucking on it before flattening it out with her tongue.

At some point, Vi could feel her cum leak down her folds, dragging along the inside of her thighs, and she could feel the muscle tense in her thighs for holding herself up for so long. She loses feeling in her thighs, and giving out as she lands on Aspen’s face. Vi leans back up again, with an apologetic whine before gasping as she feels Aspen pull her down again. Vi soon reaches her release, with her hands fisting the pillow underneath Aspen’s head, and Aspen practically suffocating happily under Vi’s weight.  

Sadly, Aspen did not break her nose, Vi found that amusing, and also disgusted that Aspen wanted to kiss her.

“Aspen!” Vi laughed, trying to fend off an eager Aspen; who’s lips were puckered ready for a kiss. “I am not kissing you with that dirty mouth! Clean it.”

Aspen huffs, reaching behind her to pull out tissue paper, wiping her mouth hastily; throwing the soiled paper over her shoulder and pouncing back toward Vi, only to whine out a response when Vi pushes her back. “With water.”

Aspen rolls her eyes but obliges, running into the bathroom. Vi had to keep her amused smile in when she could see the haste mess Aspen was making in her trail to get to Vi quickly, and this time Vi let her settle in; smiling whenever Aspen pressed another kiss to her mouth. “You’re the needy one.”

It was quiet between them after that, Vi was nestled in Aspen’s shoulder, her arms tight around her waist. It was a calm feeling, one that Vi enjoyed a lot; she could feel the tips of Aspen’s otherwise rough fingers trace the lines of her back tattoo. It was a comfortable silence.

Aspen hummed, tightening her arms around Vi as she rests her chin on top of Vi’s head. She could feel the chill on her open, naked body but made no move to fix it. Vi didn’t bother to cover herself up either, just melted into Aspen’s arms.

“Are you sad that I didn’t break your nose?”

“Yes.”

Vi laughs, sneaking a glance at Aspen before shaking her head. “You’re crazy.”

“Crazy is what got you under me, ain’t it?” Aspen grins; her hand sneaking down toward the curve of Vi’s ass. “No matter, though. We’ll try again next time.”

Vi should have been focused on the persistent thought that Aspen wanted to sport a bruise after having Vi sit on her, but she was too focused on the next time. “You’d want this again with me?”

“Of course, I would. Not just sex either; I want to take you out and show you off, and date you and introduce you to my friends and my family-” Vi’s heart thundered in her chest at that comment.

“I was good?” Vi mumbles, her eyes averting and her cheeks reddening; she was so quiet that Aspen had to strain her ears, until she heard what she said.

Aspen looked down at Vi and her beautiful, beautiful puppy eyes. Aspen smiled, a certain softness to it rather than her sharp playfulness. “You’re the best girl. You listened so well. You were so good for me.”

Vi could feel a new softer feel blossom in her chest, it warmed her insides and created fumes of happiness that leaked from her pores. Vi just hid her face in the pillow, her fingers running across Aspen’s forearm. “You took control a lot…”

Aspen nods, pulling Vi in closer to her chest; kissing the back of her neck. “I can give up control next time.”

Vi pulls out from her hiding place, looking up at Aspen. “You’d do that?”

Aspen scoffs playfully, her eyes running over Vi’s entire muscled body. “Yeah. Look at you. Muscle mummy. My legs are open.” Aspen lights up, leaning up slightly on her elbows as she gapes down at Vi. “Are we doing this now? Take me. Take me now.”

Vi laughs, tightening her fingers around Aspen’s shirt, pulling her back down on the bed. “Lie back and cuddle me.”

Maybe coming back to Zaun was worth it.

[katapotato55]

my theory as to why doomers exist (and how to break that mentality to be a better writer)

yesterday my sibling texted me "hey can you list me what major historical events you experienced in life for an assignment? " of course I listed the big ones like COVID and other depressing shit I went through in my life but most of the ones i listed were not super depressing. here are some of them: -the rise of steve jobs and the popularity of modern OS -the rise of smartphones -new technology completely changing the world that I thought I would never see in my lifetime, like VR and self driving cars. -massive cultural impacts such as spongebob being created affecting pop culture -the start of facebook and modern social media -pluto being declared not a planet yknow stuff on the top of my head that I thought would be interesting to write about.

then my sibling came home to tell me that most of what I sent was not helpful at all and that they meant "world events" And i asked "how the hell is the invention of the smart phone and the beginning of modern social media not considered "world events" by these standards" they said "idk just not that"

I think what they meant to say was "my teacher only wants the really depressing miserable shit the media thinks is headline worthy"

You know, I think this is why my generation is full of so many doomers. God forbid we have a positive outlook on this world and try and look at the bright side of things. god forbid we try to be optimistic for both the future and our current lives. we seem to have this thin veil of maturity that depressing=mature somehow. That the only way to make anything of nuance is to basically spam "look how shit everything is! look how enlightened I am" like you are Steve cutts.

well you know what ?

I hate art like the stuff steve cutts makes, and I hate this redundant "look how shit the world is" mentality

I plan on making an analysis post later on about Mr. Cutts, but for now let's stay on point this mentality is redundant and helps no one. yes. we do need to be aware of the bad parts of life. But being a pathetic miserable sod and ignoring the upsides is just as immature and childish as an aggressive optimist thinking the world is all sunshine and rainbows. you know why I like undertale so much ? Undertale knows when to be optimistic and has a mature take on a happy ending. Undertale ALLOWS itself to be happy. enough with the rick and morty level of writing where everything sucks and "fuck you in particular for being hopeful" only edgy 14 year olds think being depressing is the same as being mature. Maturity is understanding that there is nuance to everything and understanding that things are what they are. Do you want to be a good writer ? stop overly relying on being a sad doomer. Even the darkest writers in history like Edgar Allen Poe knew how to lighten the fuck up, because you need to understand the positives in life to effectively create dark writing.

thank you for reading this ironically negative rant, I plan to expand more on the subject later on.

EDIT

ngl i was honestly scared this post would open me up to harassment. I was genuinely terrified of attracting the psycho political crowd that treats politics like religious doctrine. first of all, shout out to this person:

I feel like this would be the perfect opportunity to talk about my struggle with depression as an artist and the stereotype behind it. the stereotype is that only the best artists are emotionally tortured people constantly struggling in agony and putting that into their art. now as someone who has been battling depression for 10 years let me tell you: that mentality is a load of horse shit. the greatest artists in history such as Van Gogh were not great artists because they were depressed they were great artists because they had a combination of passion and unique life experience. It just so happens that depression is a unique life experience to go through. being depressed does not make you deep, it just makes you feel empty and possibly sad depending on what flavor of depression you have. all the great stories about depression are not great because its about depression, but because its about the writers personal experiences and the love and hard work that went into making it. if Van gogh got treatment for his mental health issues, he would have still created art. Yes he created art as his job, but he also did it because he loved it and put his personal feelings and passion into his work. the biggest reason why I detest Steve Cutts is because there is no passion nor personal experience in his work. yes he is talented but most of his animations are just regurgitating all the bad things he could think of and nothing personal is going into it. (again I plan on making an analysis post about steve cutts sooner or later) What makes the art of Van Gogh deep and Steve Cutts as deep as a dry puddle is the fact that you can tell who put their own soul and personality into their work. heed my warning new artists and writers depression =/= deep all depression does is cripple you. Seek out life experience to be the best artist you can be.

[boring-brooklyn-babe]

Sun Sextile Pluto Transit

Pluto is all about transformation, power, and deep psychological issues. When the Sun, which represents your sense of self and identity, makes a harmonious aspect to Pluto, it can offer an opportunity for powerful personal growth.

During a Sun sextile Pluto transit, you might experience;

A desire for greater self-awareness. You may feel a strong urge to explore your innermost thoughts and feelings, and to understand yourself on a deeper level.

An opportunity for transformation. This transit can offer a chance to release old patterns and behaviors that no longer serve you, and to embrace a new way of being.

Increased confidence and personal power. As you gain a deeper understanding of yourself and your inner workings, you may find yourself feeling more empowered and confident in your interactions with others.

Now remember, this transit isn't all sunshine and rainbows. It can be a challenging time, as you confront aspects of yourself that you may have been avoiding or denying.

So, if you're going through a Sun sextile Pluto transit, embrace the journey. Take some time to reflect on your innermost thoughts and feelings, and be open to the possibility of transformation and personal growth.

[evansblues]

Based on his chart, can you tell what all his soul is looking for in love? People have done chart readings before, but you give more a neutral reading and better understanding

I love this question. With regards to Chris I would say it’s not so much what he’s looking for but what he needs. I can tell from his Juno conjunct Pluto in libra that his spouse will change him significantly, and she will balance him out. It will be a very big, life-changing event when he finds her, and it will open the doorway to the next phase of his life. She will be his other half, and this is something that he hopes and dreams for since it’s his 11th house. I said before that he needs someone who simulates him mentally, this is crucial. He’s mostly, in his personality, a combination of Gemini and Scorpio. These are the two signs that are the most inquisitive. They are the two signs that need to have the answers; the other signs see the truth or facts as a function of some thing. A means to an end. Gemini and Scorpio see it as a necessity, he will need somebody with placements that support the same need for knowledge and exploration of fact, Gemini and Scorpio are the diggers. They are the ones who will go finding information. He needs someone who appreciates that, and probably has the same tendencies because if he’s with somebody that doesn’t understand that or doesn’t have the same passion for it, I t’s not going to validate him in the way that he needs. It’s absolutely crucial. This is further supported by his mercury conjunct Venus and Athena in his 8th house. Information is something he loves and is personally transformed by. These placements are trining his moon in Scorpio, so his emotions are tied into it. He’s a deeply emotional person with his moon in Scorpio especially in the 12th house and especially with those cancer placements, so he will need someone who understands a great depth of emotion and who can meet him there.

I have always seen people talk about his future spouse like she is some kind of 1950s housewife. Remember how television was back then where people never talked about serious or dark issues? She will need to have a darkness because he needs to connect on that level and he has a darkness so he can’t have somebody who’s all sunshine and rainbows because he won’t feel understood and he won’t be able to talk to them about his thoughts on things like the occult. I mentioned how Tara isn’t into that and probably says things that are denigrating of it; he needs somebody that he can express his more esoteric views to. It’s mandatory. The person he will end up with is someone who is going to have similar troubling life experiences, very deep emotions, and an interest in things like tarot and astrology, probably some sort of eastern philosophy. However, she will also have to have balancing qualities to her. She’ll have to have a depth of emotion, but she will have to have a constancy where he feels nurtured and grounded, like his Cancer placements need. I talked about a couple of his exes being too similar to him where they didn’t balance each other out. They just had the same traits, and it made things worse when they were bad or manic when they were good. It’s generally necessary for people to be understood emotionally but also balanced and soothed. This requires someone with similar life experience and outlook but a different temperament and approach.

He needs someone who stimulates and encourages his creativity. I see a lot of creative potential for him. But he’s very lacking in fire signs and he needs that for his north node   In fact, speaking elementally, he has a lot of air and a lot of water. They don’t go together. They are separate, that’s why he yo-yos. He needs fire and Earth. I would guess that he needs somebody with a balanced chart  because they need to relate to him with the signs that he has, but they also need to balance him out with the elements that he doesn’t have;  they can’t just have the opposite signs because those aren’t as relatable. Compatible, yes, but Scorpio in particular needs another Scorpio placement to be understood. For those of you that know at least sun sign astrology, where you talk about what your Sun sign is and how you relate to other people with difference Sun signs, (oh I’m a Leo, what are you?) you will know that there are some people that you always get along with and some people that you never get along with, just based on Sun sign. Scorpios need others Scorpio placements. They need people who have the same depth as they do, they need people who have the same inquisitiveness that they do, and they need people who have the same karma and darkness that they do. I wouldn’t want to see too much of it, but it needs to be present.

He’s always attracted to these people with cancer placements. He has his Venus and his mercury there so they stimulate his love and his inquisitiveness, but it always seems to be a problem. I think because it’s too much, particularly if it’s the sun right there. The thing about cancer placements is that they have the potential, if they’re conjunct especially his mercury, to directly square his Saturn and Jupiter, which means it’s would affect his career negatively. So as much as he likes those placements and is drawn to them, it’s probably not the best placement to have. A better placement. would be, for example, something in Virgo that’s trining his Cancer. It’s grounding earth and if it’s a good placement like Venus and it’s conjunct midheaven it will make him look good publicly. edit: it would have to be early Virgo in his ninth house to avoid squaring his Sun, and it would have to be a benefic.

His Gemini and Scorpio placements also cannot be too negatively aspected because they’re very dear to him and very integral to who he is so they can’t be a source of conflict. I would expect to see a connection to them, obviously, because they’re his personal planets and a negative but not terrible aspect to something like his Mars, where it would be more of a banter thing than fighting could be fine he might even like that. Although, one of the big obvious things that was wrong with his relationship with Jenny was that she has both her son and her moon in Aries, which directly sextiles his Gemini and it was too much fighting. It might’ve been fun banter at first, but then he just became too much because it’s both their Sun and her moon and his Mars and that’s way too much, even though the sextile is a harmonious aspect.

I realize I’m describing more of a chart than I am specific attributes, but the thing is charts are so complex I can’t tell you what this person would be like because there are a number of ways that various placements can manifest, and even people with very similar charts can have one significant difference in their big three and thus be very different people. Even identical twins are still different people, because the same chart can still have leeway in how it expresses. One of the key things that he needs is someone who has a chart distribution that compliments his and a lot of that is gonna depend on the rising sign. So even if you have for instance a Virgo Venus, which I already use as an example, if it’s in your fourth house it’s gonna be a really big problem because that’s his public image and a fourth house Virgo is gonna be very private, so he is not going to feel very good to someone who wants their privacy. It means that everything in their home life is gonna be out there. That’s another problem with some of the placements I see him being drawn to over and over is that the area of the persons life or the individual who has that placement is different from where he has it and if they don’t jive, it won’t feel good. He has a very public Leo, where his north node is and if somebody has a very private Leo, that would conflict with his need to be out there. Or it could conflict with someone’s sense of self. I don’t think he could be with a Leo rising, for example, because that would mean that what he’s trying to be is too much of what somebody else is an identify, since it’s their first house, that could be a source of conflict. This is why the rising is the difference in how the chart placements affect someone’s life and which areas it happens in. Thats why the rising sign is so important to have and that’s another thing  but I would be looking for. Because he has all of his planets in the top half of the chart he would need someone with a similarly public journey in life. That was the big problem with Minka. All her placements were in the bottom half.

In short, he’s looking for someone that can meet him emotionally, he’s looking for someone that can stimulate him intellectually, he’s looking for someone that doesn’t judge him and has similar experiences to him, he’s looking for someone that doesn’t negatively affect his work or public image, and he’s looking for someone that he can banter with, but not argue with; he’s looking for an equal. 

[finnslay]

"Trepidation" by Pluto, age 5. Friday, February 2nd, 2024

They call it insomnia. I call it impending doom. Extreme trepidation for the slumber to crawl onto my skin and my brain to unleash the horrors of unknown onto my body. I can feel the ice pulsing through my veins as I lay in bed, pulling up the cover. I get the urge to pull them over my head and suffocate myself, for perhaps then I could escape the so-called dreams that constantly haunt me. I resist the urge, settling my head on my pillow and turning onto my left side.

Tiredness sweeps over me, as does fear. It crawls under my skin and puts a chill down my spine. I inhale and exhale, attempting to remind myself that I am in a safe space. Even still, the thoughts persist. They scratch, puck, poke, and pull at my brain, attempting to lull me into sleep so that they can overwhelm me and my consciousness. I try to hold my eyes open, but thr longer I sit there, the harder it gets. Eventually, it wins.

I awake with sweat around me, heart pounding and body shaking. I blink and attempt to slow my breathing, which is running at a mile a minute. I sit and breathe, trying to think happy thoughts. I remember all the people that have said, "The bad thoughts cannot hurt you if you don't let them!" All I have to do is fight against them, right? I just have to push away their negative connotations and skin as cold as December away from my brain. Then, I'll be free.

However, it is not that simple. It never was and never will be. The thoughts will pry until they one day win. Life is not all positivity. There is no simple sunshine and rainbows. Sometimes, you must go through a storm with fierce thunder pounding against your skull and lightning flashing in front of you while sending electricity over all the cells of your body, shocking ever atom. You must brave the storm to see the bright sun rise over the horizon.

Sometimes, for people like me, this challenge comes with just falling asleep.

[damianbugs]

9 and 13!

9. What’s your favorite line(s) or scene(s) that you have written?

13. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

side note these were such fun questions but it took me so long to answer because what the hell since when did i write so many fics ???? someone needs to stage an intervention because FIFTY FOUR ?! goodness

despite the horror of realising i have way too much time on my hands i love talking about writing batfam so !!! here are some of my personal faves :]

9. What’s your favorite line(s) or scene(s) that you have written?

PLUTO.

it's another moment in the fic where i made jason see the painful cracks in this darker batman and see who pluto!bruce could have been, especially on the topic of family and choice. he's my friend and he has many problems

THE MOON KEEPING WATCH OVER ME.

this is the very last line in this tim and damian fic and its probably my favourite ever because its literally what i was trying to show in the story. sometimes all you need is a brother and some time to realise that :)

ALL THE ASHES IN MY WAKE.

writing this fic genuinely changed some sort of chemical balance in my brain because i have not been normal about bruce and damians dynamic since then. this line is like the sunshine rainbows unicorns i included before it all got very bad very quickly (with a happy ending!)

AN ACHING HEART TO SMILE INSIDE.

DUKE THOMAS AND BRUCE WAYNE DYNAMIC YOU WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS. if dc won't give them back to me I will take matters into my own hands and thats what this is

A GRAVE FILLED WITH BOOKS.

PLUTO might be a gazillion words but THIS? my true magnus opus. my downfall. i ruined my own life with this. never recovered. never will. i will be buried with it.

13. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

thankfully not really, but i do often get people who don't read the tags asking me why the fic is not finished or why it ended like that, despite the very clearly bright neon underlined flashing AMBIGUOUS/OPEN ENDING tag staring at them. sometimes people can be rather mean about things they're confused about that can be explained by looking at the tags! though i don't think it's always malicious :]

there was also recently where someone left a huge comment about why my fic was not good because they didn't like the way i made jason resolve things with bruce 😭 to which i laughed at it and showed all my friends and we all made fun of it together <3

[solardick]

And they cut the power

Night of romance with myself. Minus all

The trash.

What i do to deserve this time?

Ive already served a life sentence how many more years do you want?

May i have the power back now. Im sivk of thinking about how lifr fucks me. Id rather think about a pretty girl and rabbits and puppies and rainbows and shit.

But apparently thats a bad thing. Being a ositivr functional citizen promote good vibes instea dof negative ones.

But its not my choice i dont get to decide. Im just here to be fucked with. Going on 40 years.

Power. I eant to go back to working as a team slaying evil. Instead.

I think they enjoy. Fucking into suicidal longing.

Me.

I just want to lay vack on the couch wirh somebody. No need to talk. Watch a movie or binge a series. And hold them close. Lay back on my lap, even, as i touch their hair. Quiet, peace, obvess of people harming me. And think about the futire.

Ive never experience a sense of tranquility ans security before. And i most likely never will.

The world is full of heroes and villains. Not much for heroes.

No their bussy brain raping me right now.

And they cut off my internet.

Ir they kulled my xbox. No proactive social behavior from you. Mr.

Maybe bot. False alatm of attack. Got it back.

How to live in a hostil world serrounded by enemies raping upur existance while playing nice?

Is there a self help book with that tittle?

Its pretty bad when your own health care system is your enemy. Like uour not paying for its services.

You just get taxed to be fucked with. Add in all the thousands of dallards give from cig tax.

The hundreds of dalloard ive given for child health care services.

Then tell that foreigner. That he has no byssiness working in a shop of get it down attitudes while be thta feminine. He should go to walmart and he’ll be able to talk about his jappenese boy band interests to all the girls that eork there.

Can i not have a place to mtself man. I do not like the people you keep

Pairing me eith.

And my rejectiin of wellfare support. Or u enplyement. Even when ive been out of eorl for months.

All that money is going to old people that dont need ears.

All those baby boomers that gave hard pluto aspects on me.

Isnt the pluto swiare pluto about killing the homoerotic bs? The fact it happens in the i fluence of ky mother. With staurn conjucnt pluto and urabus conjucet sun. After quitting her church seasions. ….. hmm

What you trying to kill my

Mother or something. Id rather you killed my father. My motjer deserves her hell. And my dather is too much the fool to even.

That fucktard did nothing but curse and swear profanities and sexual derogatorues every moment ive ever known him.

Well that phone call did clarify one thing. They are intentional giving me poor mental health.

Swearing allows me to bypass the intensity of my bluntness

After i trained that kid and helped him overcome his self sabotaging, to have the confidence to work better.

Not many people who shw any gratefulness.

With after an hour of being fucked with by GAP opperatives. Never called the pharmacy. And to force me to repeat myself literally 12 times and over. Then i made her repeat it again. Just to own it.

It be like me teying to constantly pair they all with a bunch of mormons that they had to obey or else. Suffer the mormon punishment. All smiles and sunshine now.

And everytime you get out of line ill dose you with spychotics. Oe the equalvwnt of sleep

Deprivarion. So then they can beat on you some more. Or some group of people your prejusdice too. God knows you got more than i do.

Hey lookmim talking to the fuckers flicking my power. Like a bunch of losers. Right in sync watching on their cameras.

Fuck are they fucken with me right now. With the lights and the power. Flick flick. Fucken losers man. Good for nothign wastign their time. They could be spending on something awesome bu the waste ruining my life.

Wonder what i did to deserve it this time. Ive asked myself this question for 25 years now. Going on 26. Maybe even more. Time gets blurry the farther away uou are.

Well

So much for ever growing uo i guess. Not allowedd to.

Guess they dont want me gaming anymore.

When may i fart?

Amazing that they turned a broken tootb into this while big giant debacle to stupid rapist bs.

Well you guys did wisper that she was my wife in my ear one morning. So it must be true. Perfectly safe and sound.

Just like the family relates. No one loves you go kill yourself. If you dont want to be a woman.

Ok fune they are never going to

Stop fucken with me until i go full queer. Theres no gay for me. Im just here to be manhandled and fucked.

But im going to need two boyfriends since the relationship will be based purely on sex. The. I could quit having a job and become a ful time house wife. Then i could get fucked up the ass everynight. While sucking off my boyfriend. And ill cease being anperson. And juat become a sex addict. Perma child.

Wasting my life away year after year as they maneuver to turn me into a queer. So many years already. You’ll see man. I’ll do

Some

Pretty sick twisted ahit.

I dint understand why wveryone has always hated me so much.

Well lets go

See what they’re going to

Do

To

Me next.

And theres no other explanination other then they are all wrong. But being a minority. Doesnt affect the other side.

Soend all thise years framing me into this.

Byt theyre stupid and do t get it neither do they care. So my life is forfeit anyway with out a trial.

No one has ever gotten me right. And this is no different. What they see isnt what is there.

Its permanent. So ill be a sexually active senior?

Well guess im no longer bi-

Well, thats a no. Just fucken around like everyone.

Stay quiet. Stay alive.

Look its snothrr movie about my life. Its a real terrible movie. Its like being in your bedroom.

Theres not much left of my mind anymore. All these years of abuse have eaten away at me.

Because you jnow intook my gf cat and through it a wall because i eas mad. Of course i did. Some one said. So. Even though every kittwn sent home to be taken care off, litteraly died by a “mysteriously broken neck” same with my pet rats.

If enoigh peiple gef together the can twiste and weave whatever fabrication fits whatever make beleabe story they want. My entore teality is a hod damneed lie made by other people.

God damned i want a cigarette. Made a quick noose today. Simce im being framed and taped into suicide.

It be like ripping that kids patch on his jacket in elementary school. Mother said he cant be friends with me no more. Because im dis it in purpose. What kind of kid rips their clothing when their are playing. Oh lord. I also suppose that that kid who dislocated his knee while playing dodge ball was my fault too. Coming from a guy whos rescues baby bords from fallen trees.

When you have an entire group of peoplw intentionally pissing you off passed the breaking point. They sying oh what i bad man.

Supposed i also tried burning fown the old oga in knowlton too uh. The building i was no where near that day. Like its my fault peoplw were coming jnto my appartment and putting speed

In my food.

Or messing with me on every avenue to illicit a neutotic episode and then saying go to therapy.

Or like i tentionally teying to thrn me inot a sissy faget whole telling me gay jokes. I have an attituse problem sometimes. Really. I cant i dersstnd why. Understanding is the enemy to action. Tellign that little girl to stop making gay jokes at my expense. Or i’ll do domething about it. Gave her fair warning. Ahe didnt listen, so i made an official complaint agaisnt her. She dosnt get fired or sen tfor

An investigation. Nope. But i tell i girl to stop flirting with me and its sexuel harrasment. Ok sure why not. Seem sto me i m being punisher for what othe rpeoplw

Do to me.

Still feel guilty and bad about that kitten. But i didn’t through it agaisnt a wall. I dont kill or harm animals. Liek the tabbiys you fucktard left layign around. To suffer to be eatne alive by crows.

Now excurs eme i gave to go

Get raped i to suicide for

The crime if beign born.

Oh the reason why i stair at dildos all thr tine is because i fabtasize anout sitting on them.

Just giveng a fish a bone.

Well ill be my ass isnt infoamed for the first time in over 4 months. Coukd it be they stoped dosing me with dicknin ass desease medication?

You gonna pretend to be another storm and flicke my lights sone more.

Guess the pills i didnt take are working.

Aint nonage of aquirius here. Got to make that happen.

I already know hoe this story ends. Ends with me being dead.

Why would i get a pet. Someones hust going to kill it.

But a paa re nyly im just a peice of shit. That needs anti-spychotics while being damaged and fucked with sp i dont have neutotic episodes and i cant take my beatens in silence.

A re you allergic to milk. While here have some icecream.

So whats next in the plan to belittlement and make me feel like a small piece of shit. Surrounded but all this boys wearing their bigboy pants?

Wonder what not being attcjed feels like. Or lock in a prison cell feels like. Oh well.

Know what ive never experiences before being oaired with someone who doesnt want to hurt me. Something o the bucket list before i die. But Ll i get paired are homos. Spychotivs or criminal. Or a mix of the three. And all they do is hurt me. I hate homos now. Well modt of them. All the ones you keep pairing me with. Who speak crow.

But i feel bad that the majority are all brainwashed, manipulated and encouraged to keep it flowing.

Well

Lets go back to being derrounded by wnemies. Messing with my exixtamce. Its all i know. Its all

Ive ever known.

So thos whole thing. Is on one of my tooths tgat the dentist sabotaged broke and needs to be pulled.

Are they even using the right ascendant?

What wver it is im guilty off. It must be true. Because other peiple say it is. And othe reiple are tight because. Its just me alone. What else you got ive been thrpugh worst. Im just full of shit and a liar. So. Don’t beleive me.

Theres nothing worst than being swallowed by darkness. First time i deserved it. The bext three tomes i diddn’t.

Something you guys will never understand. Cause youve never been there. And then while your serrounded by a bumch of assholes that beat on you every other day. Wanting desperatly to say something but you can’t. And year after year. You die a little more. And all those assholes continue to treat you like dog shit. And then on those moments where you did. And they tell you. They don’t care.

And then some asshole comes and says you going to suffer for the eest if your life. Because you didn’t say anything. Yup. Hell its whwre i was born. Serrounded ny assholes. Calling me an asshole. Blow me.

Too bad a quiet place 3 is too heavily queer conditioned.

Wow people sure like making lies about me.

Apparently i told that queer foreign kid to get the fuck out of the van. Corabwrated by the guy who has the gay whis speaks crow. No. I said no im not done yet get out.

If yoyr gonna hive me shit. At least make it for somethign im guilty of instead bs that isnt even true. Which is probabbly90% of the bs toyr all

Talk about my back abouy.

Listen to my x apparently i trhoigh a cat a wall caus ei was

Mad.

Meanwhileni got family members killing my pets.

Probably already being set up for the next hit.

Injust can’t help it. I like to make people smile.

Amd its either my mother or my elsest brother whis a pet killer. Drowned a brothers turtles. Snapped a kittem neck and killed my rats.

But apparently im a homophobe whis also an asshole. Go figure.

Singled out and alone in the family. Singgled out and alone in the school, singled out and alone at work. Singled out and alone in the cominity. Always a minority always being shat on. Even in my solitude. Minding my own business.

Call me a homophobe. I have it just as bad as they ever did. Always have been under attack. And i always will. Going on 40 years. Used to be a point of solidarity. But, not anymore.

Huess the greeks were wrong. Sont lift the hydra into the light. Soesnt do anything. Its caretakers will interfeer.

Unlike you. Ive never talen oleasure or joy in fucken with people.

But it was kind of funny. Being written up on a lie. Instead of what i actually did worng, again. And then justin fidgeted behind my back when i mentioned there being a while lot of people fucking with me. Based on false accusations.

They really wanted to give me a lift home. So i said sure why not krystal. Lets see what other bs you have for me. Nice touch on the bottle of pills in your purse. Not to mention the two times you laughed at me. Well sniggered. But no one cares.

And its fun being beaten i to suicide by other peoples delusions. But thats what happens when you too busy sucking off the devils cock. Like its fun to be you.

Dont forget to share your home videos of me. In the bathroom.

Wouldnt be the forst. Wont be the last.

I want to donate some blood. Get rid of some of my dead blood cells.

Hopefully i can get back to myself again. Instead being distracted by a bunch of imbeciles. Almost died 4 times in the last four years alone. Thry think its funny. What do you call someone like that. Gotta label them somehow.

My empire is still growing. Hiw doesnt know my name. My name has more power in it then all you out together. Comming at you from the inside.

You dont love me?! But, but i shaved my butt for you. And it never grew back. What am i supposed to do now?

Rogaine.

Wonder how much longer ill survive being fucked with by all these rapist. Before i die.

What? No mire church letters to teel me salvation is coming?

Cheers in never havign experienced ehat not being fucked with feels like.

There was one girl who stook up for me. In elementary while i was being yelled by thr teacher cuase she didnt like the colours i used in my mothers day card.

Oh im goig to be late for work. God forbid if a miss another day of being manipulated and raped. Dont want ot get in trouble for what everyone else dies everyday.

Mother and sister pull by. “Hi!” Turn my head. Who is this? Oh. “ hi” keep walking. I font know who you are. Spent 30 with her. Dont know a thing about her. Uou hinna smack me around some more if, i ask a questiin?

Sorry i have an army of assholes whi treat me like a wife beater. Youbhonna smack me around dome more right after being punched in thr face by a spychopath?

Im not even going to attend your funeral. Leave me alone. Ill probablt die before uou anyway.

…. “Die now, and curse in vain.”

But it looks like hey dosed me again. Jo work tomorow. Back to suicide.

Last tine ghey brought my mither and sister into rhe picture. They gave me a masdive fose tgat put me out for over a week. They fave me break after to faux storm of twitchibg my powerbof and on. I couple days off. Aftwrcs made a noose.

Eithe rthey ruened my alarm off today. Or i did in my sleep. Considering they moniter by sevit card purchases. Its not a far cry.

Since i dontbhave the base security. I cant leave or make any decision. So im stuck here. Its the security that develops in childhood through adolescense. I dibt have that. So its for ed to be through another crisis whete i get paired woth abusive asshole.

Guess its this for the res if my life until i gave someone to talk to. Who treats me like a human being and isnt apart of the rapist comunity.

I dont even gwt to have any genuine human contact.

Just people fucken with me until i tell them to go fuck themselves and get punished for it.

Wow human contact. Well i meant it in consistency. But the breif moment. Was nice. Dont knownif it was genuine. Though.

[theerokeworld]

It's My Time Finally - My Hero | 210124

Game on! For the last time in our lives, the Sun and powerful Pluto join forces in Capricorn and your ambition arena early on Saturday, pushing you to tout your accomplishments and prove your capabilities. If you want to step into a leadership role at work or assume bigger responsibilities, you can use the week to polish a presentation or pitch. Make sure your objectives are in keeping with your highest values, Ram. Pluto can be manipulative, so you might inadvertently become a bit ruthless in your quest. That same day, both the Sun and then Pluto segue into Aquarius, shining a spotlight on networking, which is the ace up your sleeve until February 18. A whole new era of group ventures is dawning, thanks to Pluto’s transformative presence in your humanity house. While the planet of mystery crawls through Aquarius for the better part of 20 years, there could be allies AND adversaries around you. Ready for a new career chapter? Teamwork is the key to your success. And with the strength that Pluto has given you, you can make a solid decision about which way to pivot.

Finally! I've been counting down these funky ass days that I have been wondering about. Like I know I am not thee only one questioning if my last good years were right before I graduated from high school in 2009. Because of these state us Aries's, Libras, Cancers, and Capricorns was in. As soon as the 20th hit, I have been releasing and planning out my future and money (knocking on wood) everything comes along. Me and my son need rainbows and sunshines with a little rain to keep things growing. But I'm ready!

[blxndexbeauty-archived]

@sunshine-rainbows-pluto liked this for a lyrical starter!

Don’t You Worry Child - Swedish House Mafia

“There was a time I used to look into my father’s eyes in a happy home, I was a king, I had a golden throne. Those days are gone, now the memory’s on the wall.”

[stcriescfourlives-inactive]

@sunshine-rainbows-pluto continued from here!

[text: ☀️ Sunshine Matthews ☀️] nope. it’s lil sun emojis. your contact name is ‘ ☀️ Sunshine Matthews ☀️’ [text: ☀️ Sunshine Matthews ☀️] bc u r actual sunshine incarnate [text: ☀️ Sunshine Matthews ☀️] but also... did you just say you wanted purple cat emojis??

[herwindow]

@sunshine-rainbows-pluto liked for a starter.

    "What do you mean that putting someone in their place is a bad thing?" He looked at her, as if trying to figure out if she was actually mad at him for going off on someone or not.

[7-omen-7]

Here are some names that aren’t strictly for females or males

Alpha Astrix/Asterisk Axis Blur Bolt Brick Cube Cyan Data Delta Echo Entity Error Exa/Exo Form Friday Hazard Idea Impulse Infinity Ion Kilo Kite Limit Name Nebula Neon Obsidian Plastic Point Quartz Qwerty Radar Retina Reverb Rocket Scavenger Sigma Sonar Swing Tank Tax Tera Valence Vertex Virus Vortex Audience Beat Binary Brass Cable Canon Canvas Chord Clash Coarse Crash Discord Double Feedback Forte Genre Hack Hollow Hook Impulse/Pulse Ink Key Lyric Mellow Memory Neon Noise Note Omen Phase Quaver Riddle Shallow Sharp Shiny Snare Treble Tune Twang Aloe Arrow Atlas Azure Balsa Bee Beetle Branch Bread Bridge Candle Cedar Cello Chameleon Cherry Cloud Clover Coffee East Echo Egg Ember Fern Finch Flannel Forest Gecko Gem Goose Grey Jay Kale Lake Leaf Mango Maple Moss Oak Pond Poppy Rain Raven Rock Silver Topaz Violet Wednesday Willow Wood Frog Max Alex Shawn/Shawne Kai SCP 834 Nyx Ares War Criminal Cas Sky/Skie Bee Ash Arson Vin Sal Cat/Kat Tax Fraud Liminal Dream Fade Angel Glitch Tooth Centipede Chlorine Crayon Fever Bones Ghost Eye Omen Nurse Band-aid Tape Glow Legs Decay Poison Blowfly Needle Finger Mold Doll Wasp Moth Dirt Bunny Trinket Shell Cicada Ariel Astra Aurora Celeste Luna Nova Starling Starr Stella Sunshine Aldrin Apollo Callisto Castor Comet Hercules Leo Neptune Rocket Solar Aries Eclipse Galaxy Halo Mars Mercury Moon Saturn Star Sun book strawberry cherry tea soup lace butters melody lyric bunny slime apple Saturn star venus kandi/kandy/candy glitter monster zero/zee/z neo gutz/guts brainz/brains trixie roxy rex Moss Bones Arson Rain Feather Cloud Deep Raven Fall captain bone/bones patch/patches sparrow flynn skipper boots hook reef treasure Winter Midnight Crow Corvid Raven Siren Shade Nova Veil Salem Ash Aster Devin Day Hyde Dagger Knife Psyche Osiris Pandora Haven Jade Blade Gray Ember Ebony Blue Dee Day Dove Sky Rain Ash Coin Pax Rex Mick Reef Rory Ari Bug River Dane Finn Lumi Lux Ore Roux Note Tone Melody Piper Sonata Violin Coda Riff Alto Lyre Lyric Calypso Cadence Chorus Canto Chanson Harper Lorelei Octave Song Muse Canon Clef Motif Legato Nonet Pan Rhapsody Trill Vevace Dusk Indigo Orion Onyx Obsidian Somnus Hypnos Morpheus Noctis Noir Nero Umbra Ash Omega Orpheus Crow Jinx Hex Grey Pandora Morrigan Shade Silver Zephyr Storm Crimson sprinkle Bunny cloud Skittle kitty birdie bee flower Grass peach strawberry cherry Berry Apple Berry Apricot Huckleberry Mulberry Honeydew Lychee Peach Cherry Basil Bayleef Pepper Anise Clove Coriander Ginger Nutmeg Rosemary Rue Sesame Thyme Saffron exe/txt/pdf/gif web/website tech emoji sci beta dell chip zip Arson Blue Blur Brick. Cloud Detective Dice Egg Elmers Error Gremlin Icon Jester Lake Leaf Mischief Nike Nintendo Pi Royal Skull Spark Ten Tesla Vortex Yoshi Zero Zoom angela/angelo/angie angelonia/angel andy/andi ann/annie/anny antares andromeda bone/bones biscuit/biskit paw fluffy fetch scout chase skull corpse blade jinx hex bat bandit rogue trick/tricky smoke lee leo/lio pluto mars orion redd avery aster cyrus cleo miles quinn indigo amber ruby sugar lace/lacey boba rosie mae merry dottie plush/plushie cinnabun pompom teddy peach smile/smiles/smiley alphabet blocks bug snail paint crayon slime sticker rainbow gummy candy/kandi button bandaid glitch static disc pixel robot/bot glitter wire/wires code key/keys virus byte bunny/bunnie/bun kitty/kit/kitten plush/plushie milk fluff cloud bubble/bubbles angel ghost tea cookie bow / ribbon bonbon puff / creampuff Nintendo Mossy Quill Spark Vermillion Cotton Candy (or C.C. for short) Cocoa Indigo Sunset Elmers Snowy Sketchpad Frost Jester Poltergeist Spirit Cricket Poem Puck Mischief Truffle Golden Clay Feather Hatchet Gremlin Stone Brad Chad Thad Zoom Crayon Detective Otter Sonic Armadillo Ocelot Puggles (name for baby platypus) Dylan Logan River Fince Ellory Finn Converse Sage Saint Sal Saturday Saxon Scan Scatter Scoop Scorpion Scout Scream Sea Senti Sentinel September Serene Seven Shade Shadow Shake Shatter Shaw Silent/Silence Silver Siphon Skill

[solardick]

Year one.

As to pluto and uranus seeming interchangeable, one always has residue from the other.

Prime seal.

… ugh. And i give up having any human connectiin to anyone. Its never going happen. Been trying for 40 years. It diesnt exists in hell.

I was just born for the sole purpose of being fucked. And never experiencing anythign other.

Yay, neptune is coming to aries. Time to soems the rest of my life in a delusion.

Well, guess i’ll if i survive another year. Its another eros/psyche conjunction this Christmas. A spyche/ Eros return for my birthday. With okuto square oluto. And saturn square/ opposition uranus. Everything is hapoening on the late. 26th ish degrees. Ass is still sensitive. Makes me want to die. Another year stolen by the enrourage pf people working me over these last few decades. And this rapist culture. They tild me 20 years ago that i may not survive this.

But they’re dumb and biased and have my motives all wrong. Doesnt matter im always im the wrong being wronged.

Moral of my life story, dint fight for what you beleive in.

All my dreams are dead. Theres no point being alive. In hust a villain framed by fucken villains.

Maybe if i live to see neptune in aroes in this scrit dedigned yo rape my life. Ill spend the rest of my “functionsl” yeRs veinb an alcoholic.

Freat my ass is going to keep me up all night again. Miss more work. Lose more life. Not like im

Not serrounded by there anyway. Its always been that way. Since birth.

Well, tarot’s dead. Now i no longer even have a hobby. I have nothing.

I din’t need a brain or personal development or to learn anything. Ill just be pure sex. Nothign else.

And ill nusy pretend i like the people im with. Bit i really do not give a shit. Thats too bad i was good at tarot. I can just go back to indiscriminately watching tv again. And ill just go back to fantasizing about sex all day. Cause thats all im good for.

Wonder what hating myself for the rets of kife is going to be like. I don’t need to produce or create anything. Im just here to satiate desires for others to stabd over me. Its been 40 years of it. Its not going to stop now. Do need life guard qualities either. Don’t need to help and try to fix others. Or take any position of assertion. Theres no point.

There’s only tei reasons to be alive. To reproduce or to produce. I cant have either. Im just here to consume whatver cock they through at me. Cayse i live in a hypersexed perverted, rapist civilization. That Just shits all over natural law. They’ve destroyed everything. I dont even childhood memeries.

Well huess im not dtaying at wirk todsy.

Go hime play video games by myséf. In the dark. While syill being open to

Abuse. And smoke dope. I dont need a brain. Or a life.

Fuck tour shadow work and fuck yoyr byllshiy

My own family, took pleasure in being superior over me. Since my first memory own. Well except that short while i got to be a big brother and look out for them from all the negative influences on impressionable youth. Or dumb old people. Why wouldn’t the rest of the world too. If your own famuly did it. It doubles extra for the rest of the world.

So my suicide is still on the horizon. As with this fucken horrorscope is to year one.

Whilw this entire fucken entourage micro manages my fycken spyche, mirroring reality. If i do anything remotly masculime or hetero theyd put and leave signs around. That correspoded to ehat i was foing.

Doing everything in their power witj their homo nazi manifesto. Being totalitarians

Suppose to be happy right now with a wife and three year kid but whaéve r

I feel so wrkng and unatural i fucken hate this. Fucken kill me. My father is fucken laughing at me.

How many more years i am going to be tortured by assholes.

Im quitting my day rape job and hanging myselg.

Everyone including my family are forcing me to kill myaelf how do you think i feel. 40 fucken years of this shit.

Yeah ok, sure. All rainbows and sunshine abd mental bs. With no sleep, and a vagina that never goes dry.

And wveryone thinks im sonething im not.

Fuck your horrorscope and fuck uranus.

Fuck you all for dtanding by watching and reading and not helping me be rid of those fucken assholes being abusive fuckers. And for joining in on keeping mw envlosed in this bs. Perpetuaying the disorder and then raping me for it. Your entire way of oives deserve to burn.

A real himan bwing wouldvhave killed me instead of torture. What the fuck is wrong woth this picture. It aint me.

It dirsnt fucjen matter im being murdered ians im not hping to be alive much longer. So cheerios to a world populated by dipshits and rapists. Worse than whst russia gets flaked for.

Fucken woodpeckers.

Put that up on the list of sexual derogatories. It has the word pecker in it.

And eating chivken makes uou gay.

Finger livking good. Now im going to go buy some chocolat bars named after various cocks.

And good fortune. Saturn is the good guy. Keeping the fucks above at bay from crowsing its fucken boraders. And raping existance.

Pretty french girl with a daughter. She needed love. And to be noticed. So i watched a bit. She was trying to be inconspicous about noticing me. I smiled. Whether she saw. Im not sure maybe. My periphery iwas being used into somethign else. But, she came back aftwr she left. And whenni was walkign out the door she came back. Had her cart stuck in the door. I moved it. And like a ghost. She said something to me. That she has to go over there. An di had to move out of the way. For her to have the room to do so. I gave her the love she needed. If only in a small part that leaves her memory by tomorow.

Too bad im being murdered.

This os another part of me im teying to protect. But the world doesn twamt it.

I shouldnt show this side of me though. Unlike the sickness and bs. Its never been supported.

But their “therapy” is working.

And ill

Live out all the worset parts of me for the rest of days. And cry over never knwoing what love received feels like. Giving in to every craving, losing the conscience. Being envoloped by darkness and retard clowns.

Always filling a need or a desire over everything else. Over life itself. And the bodies it inhabits. Thats ehat the eorld wants.

I dont want to be slive anymore. Why cant i judg kill myself.

I dont need to be able to focus on anything. Or even sleep.

And i dont need to self -develop at all. In any posotive capacity. I have othets to do that for me. Save that they dont care.

I coukd be a normal person going through a divirce settlement at moment. But no.

Be on pills for the rest if my life. That restrict me from driving.

I aont taking anti depressants. That shit fucked me up. Made me unstable. And imbalanced. Even after 2-3 years of “covid” or emasculation. Same thing. I still firgot my mask everyday. It was the same with the pills. Then i got beat up again and family members ayanding over by body on the ground. Lecturing me. Then i quit the pills and got raped by the world.

One homo or drunk or drug addiilct after the bext fucken abusing me. Year after year. Place after place. While being in this entrapement of shadow assholes guiding me to everything negative experience. To force me into being a sissy slut.