#t: exes to lovers | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

potaetopic · 1 year ago

Text

You expressed firmly, "That's not going to change anything. We are not getting back together." You reiterated your stance, hoping he would come to accept it and eventually find a way to move forward.

WE. ARE NEVER EVER EVER. GETTING BACK TOGETHER. WEEEEEE— i just had to that, im sorry😭

The way Jimin said your name almost made you hide out of shame. "You can't retaliate. What happened to 'we are never getting back together'? Taylor Swift will be very disappointed in you."

AHAA! i knew it!!!!

In Jungkook's case, he was willing to risk his life and climb seven floors to reach you, showing the depth of his determination to make things right.

oh god, he's crazy. reminds me of seven jk at that high thingy (idk what its called, that for build and stuff)

"Fine, I'll go now. But I won't stop," he declared, stopping right in front of you. "I won't stop until you realize that you're the one that I want. I won't stop until I convince you that you're the one for me, and I love you more than anything in this world. I'm not giving up on you, on us, baby. I don't care how long it takes, I'll beg you every day if I have to, but I won't stop until you come back to me."

yep, that's it. the lines that make me rethink my life choices. its a hella toxic relationship, and jk is one hell of a walking red flag, but he just. had to deliver this line. and knock my beating heart again

exes trope always has a place in my heart. and this? thank u for bringing this out for the world to see. i love it v v much

Night After Night

Established relationship au

Pairing: Fuckboy bf! Jungkook x Reader

MINORS DNI

Genre: lovers to exes to exes to lovers, Mostly crack, fluff, and smut but a little bit of angst because I'm a bitch.

Words : 17.6k

Summary: "Show you what devotion is, deeper than the ocean is".... You broke up with your boyfriend because he couldn't let go of his fuckboy antiques now he's gonna win you back whatever it takes.

Warnings: Toxic relationships, Jungkook is the biggest red flag but we love him, SMUT [ ITS FILTHYYY, FINGERING, ORAL SEX (Both receiving), PENETRATIVE SEX ( Vaginal), UNPROTECTED SEX (Don't be stupid like Jungkook, please)].

A/n: This is unedited, no proof reading done.

*******

For the thousandth time this evening, you couldn't help but roll your eyes as you witnessed your boyfriend, once again, openly flirting with another girl in your presence. It wasn't as if he was unaware of your presence, and he wasn't doing it secretly behind your back either. He knew very well that you were right there, and the irony was that he was supposed to fetch you a drink when he stumbled upon a pair of boobs on the way.

'Baby, it will be fun,' he had said when he insisted on taking you to this party. Yet now, you found yourself sitting awkwardly on a filthy couch, uncomfortably witnessing two guys passionately making out while your so-called boyfriend indulged in flirting with the brunette, who had her hands all over his biceps. You could bet a million dollars that he was flexing them right now.

When you first met Jungkook in your college, he had the title of the biggest fuckboy of the campus and a snap score of 3 million, yes 3 million and if that's not the biggest red flag then what is? But despite the fuckboy behaviour he was a decent person. After trying (and succeeding) to get in your pants at the frat party you first met, he asked you out on a date. And of course you said yes. He gave you the full date experience, in fact it was one of the best dates you had in a while.

He took you to the movies and was respectful, keeping his hands to himself throughout the outing. During the date, he took care of you, ensuring you were well-fed and enjoyed yourself. Afterward, he even made the extra effort to drive you home in his own car, instead of that death ride he usually brings to college. He was so determined to show you that it wasn't just about sex that he didn't even insist on kissing you at your door, it was you who dragged him inside by his collar to fuck you senseless.

Jungkook surprised you, everyone else and himself when he asked you to be his girlfriend only after three dates. And he was really really sweet so you said yes. To show you how devoted he was to you and how he only had eyes for you he didn't even look at other girls let alone flirt with. But that only lasted for two months. Yes, once a fuckboy always a fuckboy. Although Jungkook remained faithful and never slept with anyone else or outright cheated on you, he still indulged in flirting and entertaining any other woman he found even remotely attractive.

Initially, you tried to dismiss it as harmless flirting, but as time went on, the situation became increasingly unbearable. The only thing preventing you from ending the relationship was the fact that he genuinely loved you. Jungkook proclaimed his love for you just three months into the relationship, whereas it took you more than six months to reciprocate those feelings.

You knew Jungkook loved you because he never failed to show you. God, the extremities that boy has gone to show you how much he loves you. One time he ran 12 miles to get to you because you sprained your ankle and was in the hospital and his car was stuck in traffic. Later he ended up fainting from exertion and you found yourself taking care of him instead. It was still really sweet gesture from him.

Once Jungkook managed to free himself from the other girl's company and arrived with a big smile and your favorite beer in hand, you promptly got up and headed towards the front door, leaving your boyfriend behind in confusion.

"Where are you going?" Jungkook asked, following you outside.

"Home." You were already ordering an uber.

"We are leaving already?"

"No, Jungkook. I am leaving already."

"But why? We were having fun."

"Again, no. You were having fun, I was just asked by two guys if I wanted to have a threesome."

"What guys?" Oh the hypocrisy.

"That's not the point JK," you finally snapped, turning to confront your boyfriend. "You're the one who dragged me to this pathetic party, and instead of being there with me, you spent 20 minutes flirting with some random chick."

"Baby, you know that was harmless."

"Again with that FUCKING EXCUSE."

"I'm sorry, baby. I'm sorry, ok? You know I only have eyes for you. I don't even remember her name."

"Is that supposed to make me feel better? I'm leaving."

"Let me take you home, ok?"

"I already booked a ride."

"No, those things are dangerous at night. I'm not letting you leave in a cab," he insisted, without waiting for your reply he led you to the parking lot where his Harley was parked. Without any further protests, you let him firmly place your helmet on your head. Within just a month of dating, Jungkook had already arranged customised helmets for both of you as a couple. Though it might have seemed a bit tacky to some, it was his way of expressing a significant commitment, almost like a symbol of marriage in his eyes.

The ride was silent. Only him rubbing your thighs once in a while. You had time to think the whole ride. Contemplate every situation till now that has led up to this moment. Every time that he had flirted with other women and made you feel like shit, invisible. Every time he says 'oh but baby, at the end of the day I come back to you.' You have decided. You were done feeling like shit.

As the motorcycle came to a halt, you realized he had brought you to his place instead of your own. While you hadn't officially moved in together, it felt like you practically had, given the amount of time you spent there and the belongings you had at his place. The fact that he took you there didn't even surprise you; it was a place that felt like 'home' to both of you.

"Jungkook why'd you take me to your place. I said take me home."

"This is home, baby." He said helping you off his bike and taking off both of your helmets. "Let's just go upstairs and talk this out, then I'll make you cum and we'll go to sleep."

The short elevator ride to the upstairs apartment felt much longer, with neither of you uttering a word. As you entered and took off your jackets, you let out a sigh. The impending conversation was something you had been dreading, but you knew there was no other option; it had to be done. The atmosphere was heavy with tension as you prepared to address the issues that had been bothering you.

"Jungkook."

"Baby." He mocked your tone.

"Sit down." You pointed at the couch.

"Is this an intervention?" He asked with a grin.

"Just sit." He followed your order and stared at you with those big doe eyes that stopped you from breaking up with him until now. "I love this POV. Your tits look amazing."

"Jungkook, be serious."

"Why, do you keep calling me Jungkook. It's Koo and Baby for you."

Ignoring the comment you continued with your speech.

"Jungkook... I, I don't think this is working anymore." You said.

"What is not working? Baby, we're fine."

"No we're not. I've been waiting for you to grow out of this...fuckboy phase but it's been three years, Jungkook and you still haven't changed. It's even worse now."

"Come on, is this about Ally?"

"So you do remember her name."

"Does it matter? It was just some harmless flirting, I swear. I even told her I have a girlfriend."

"Oh, I'm so flattered," you retorted, the sarcasm evident in your voice, which seemed to annoy him slightly. Your frustration and displeasure were clear, as you couldn't overlook the impact of his behavior on your feelings.

"Look, what am I supposed to do? Stop talking to women? Is that what you want?"

"Oh my god, do you not see?" you exclaimed, your emotions pouring out. "You entertain them and flirt with them, and it makes me feel terrible, Jungkook. I'm your girlfriend, yet you don't even bother to introduce me to these women. And you call it harmless flirting? What about this?" You pulled out a piece of paper from his front pocket, confronting him with evidence of his actions.

"I had no idea she slipped it in my pocket."

"I saw you take it from her."

"But I was not going to call. I swear, baby. You know I would never. I only took that so-"

"So what? So she would wait around the whole night for you to call? That's even worse."

"Babe, look. I'm sorry. I'll do anything you want me to do. I made a mistake and I won't do it again, I promise. I swear on it."

"You don't have to. You can call her if you want to. We are done here," you declared firmly, your decision made. His eyes widened in response to your decisive words, realizing the gravity of the situation.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that I'm breaking up with you, Jungkook. It's just not working for me anymore. I'm so tired of your behavior," you expressed with a heavy heart. He was now on his knees before you, tears welling up in his eyes but not yet streaming down his cheeks. Despite the pain, you knew that ending the relationship was the best decision for your well-being and emotional health.

"No no, baby, no. We are not breaking up."

"No. Jungkook we're done."

"No."

"What do you mean no? This is not how it works."

"I'll be better, ok? I promise. Please don't break up with me. I can't live without you. Please. I'll do anything you want. I'll prove it to you." The tears were falling down now. And as much as it hurt to watch him cry you were going to stand firm on your decision. "Let me make it up to you, baby. Please." When his shaking lips made contact with yours you couldn't push him away. One last time wouldn't hurt right? Maybe you'll give him this one last time. God knows he needed this. You needed this.

So you let him. Didn't stop him when he picked you up and took you to yo- his bedroom, Laid you down on his bed, undressed you. You didn't stop him when he kissed down your body, brought you to your high with his mouth. You let him love you one last time.

******

Breaking up with Jungkook had been difficult, and it's been a week since then. The impact of the breakup weighed heavily on you as well, despite your decision being the right one. You cared deeply for him, though maybe not to the same extreme extent as he did for you, it seemed his love for you bordered on being overly intense and possibly unhealthy.

The breakup had also left you feeling deeply saddened and missing him greatly. However, the impact on Jungkook was even more profound, and describing it as devastating would be an understatement. The next day, as you began getting ready to leave, you noticed Jungkook gazing at you with a lost and vulnerable expression, like a bewildered bunny. It was heartbreaking to witness, and you had to gently remind him that you had broken up with him the night before. The pain of the breakup was evident in his eyes, and it made the situation even more challenging for both of you.

"But, baby we had sex."

"Sex doesn't fix everything, Jungkook. I'm still breaking up with you. It was goodbye sex."

Jungkook was frantic when he realised you were serious about the breakup. Begged you to stay but you had already made up your mind.

Seeing the overwhelming number of missed calls and text messages from your ex-boyfriend, you let out a sigh. Despite the breakup, he was persistently trying to reach out to you, with all the messages saying almost the same thing. While you believed that blocking someone was immature and didn't want to stoop to that level, his relentless badgering was becoming too much to handle. If he continued this behavior, you might eventually have no choice but to block him on your contacts and social media platforms.

As your phone blared for the 58th time, your coworkers shot glares in your direction, clearly annoyed by the constant interruptions. Feeling apologetic, you flashed them a smile and finally picked up the phone.

"I swear to god, Jungkook. I will block you if you don't stop calling me."

"Baby-"

"No, Jungkook. No baby. We broke up remember?"

"You broke up with me, I never accepted it. You're still my baby."

"Jungkook I'm serious. Stop calling me. I will block you."

"You won't."

"Try me."

"Come outside?"

"What? Kook, I'm not home."

"I know. I'm outside your office. They won't let me in."

"Yes I told them not to. What are you doing here? Jungkook you have a job too, you know that right?"

"I know. But it's not important right now."

"Not important right now? That's your only source of income." You reminded him, resting your forehead on your hand.

"I don't care. What will I do with the money if you're not with me?"

"Pay your bills?"

"Come outside. I wanna see you."

"I can't. I already had my lunch break. Look, Jungkook, just go back home, ok? Don't do this to yourself. I'm hanging up. Don't call me again or I will block you." You ended the call without waiting for a reply, and the calls finally stopped, but the messages persisted. Deciding it was necessary for your peace of mind, you muted his contact to temporarily shield yourself from the continuous messages.

It was 4 hours later you were exiting the office building with your coworkers when one of them pointed something out.

"Is that Jungkook?" Sherry said and you turned your attention to where she was pointing, and to your surprise, there was Jungkook sitting on one of the benches just outside the building. He stood up with a hopeful smile and waved at you as you approached. His unexpected appearance caught you off guard, and you couldn't help but feel a mix of emotions at seeing him again after the breakup.

"You guys go. I'll talk to him."

As your coworkers questioned if you were okay, you gave a simple nod to reassure them. However, you couldn't hide the glare in your eyes as Jungkook approached you. The mix of emotions inside you was evident, but you tried your best to maintain composure in front of your colleagues.

"What are you still doing here, Kook?"

"Well you told me not to call you again and your guard wouldn't let me in so I had no other option."

"Yes you did. You had the option to go home."

"But I wanted to see you." Oh god it was frustrating. You are not even surprised that he's acting like a child. He has always been like this, nagging and pestering until you give him what he wants. You are actually more surprised by the fact that he waited a whole week before showing up at your workplace.

"So what you just wait here for 4 hours?"

"No .. 8 hours. I've been here since morning."

"ARE YOU KIDDING ME?"

"No. Ask your guards. We are friends now." You closed your eyes to calm yourself.

You spoke with concern in your voice, realizing that Jungkook's actions were not healthy for him. "Jungkook, this is not healthy… Why are you doing this to yourself?" you asked, genuinely worried about the toll the breakup was taking on him. You understood that he was struggling with the situation, but his continuous attempts to contact you were not helping anybody.

"Baby, I'll do anything to prove to you that I want you back."

You expressed firmly, "That's not going to change anything. We are not getting back together." You reiterated your stance, hoping he would come to accept it and eventually find a way to move forward.

"You're saying that now."

"No. My answer is not going to change." He looked unconvinced. "At least tell me you ate something?" a small smile crept across your face as you heard his stomach loudly grumble in response to your question. You decided to set aside your differences momentarily and focus on making sure he was okay in the present moment.

"You still care about me?" Of course you still cared about him. You didn't break up with him because you don't love him anymore, you broke up because he was an asshole and you realised he was never going to change. And you have to keep reminding yourself that. He's never going to change.

"Where's your bike?"

"I didn't bring it. I don't like riding without you holding me."

"Did you bring your car at least?"

"I walked."

"You walked?"

"I figured that when you come back to me, we'd have to deal with the hassle of taking both of our cars back home and riding separately, which I didn't want to go through. So, I decided to walk instead."

"You're unbelievable." He just smiled at you as if it was a compliment. All you wanted was to go home, miss him to death and cry yourself to sleep while holding his old shirt. Was it too much to ask?

His stomach grumbled again. As if asking you to feed him. Jungkook knew he was not only torturing himself but you as well. Was this his strategy? Annoy you back in his arms?

"Fine. Let's go?"

"Are you taking me home?"

"No. I'm taking you to eat something."

"Then you're taking me home so I can fuck some sense into you and we can get past this?"

"You know what? I'm leaving. Die starving."

"No I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Please feed me."

Despite your current feelings of frustration and hurt towards Jungkook, you chose to bring him to your home that night. It wasn't for any romantic reasons or to give in to his demands. Instead, you prepared a home-cooked meal for him, knowing that he likely hadn't been eating well, surviving on ramen, cereal, and a whole lot of alcohol. And you couldn't let him go to sleep hungry, so you set aside your emotions and cared for him, making sure he had a satisfying and enjoyable meal.

*******

"You know you can't take him back right? He's very toxic for you."

On that Sunday evening, you and your best friend, Jimin, had a movie night planned to lift your spirits. The hot topic of discussion was none other than Jeon Jungkook. Unlike the rest of your friends from college who always cheered for your relationship with Jungkook, Jimin was the only one who never rooted for you two. He had always expressed his concerns about Jungkook, labeling him as toxic, and reminding you that you deserved better. Back in college, you used to get upset with him, feeling he was always negative. Ironically, as time passed, you realized that Jimin was the only one who consistently stuck by your side, while your other friends became distant.

"I know I know. But you should have seen his face, Jimin. I felt like I kicked a puppy."

"So you just took him back to your place?"

"Only to feed him, I kicked him out after, I swear."

"Really?" Jimin asked, keenly observing the guilty expression on your face. He had an uncanny ability to detect when you were lying, almost like a human lie detector. You knew you couldn't hide anything from him, and in this moment, you couldn't escape his discerning gaze.

"Ok, fine, He did stay longer than I initially said," you admitted, knowing that Jimin could see through your attempt to hide the whole truth. His raised eyebrow made it clear that he was onto you. You confessed, knowing you couldn't keep anything from your perceptive friend. "We might have had sex on the kitchen counter... And the couch... And my bedroom. But I swear that's it. I'm not lying, I kicked him out and told him it was a mistake right after. Didn't even wait till morning."

The way Jimin said your name almost made you hide out of shame. "You can't retaliate. What happened to 'we are never getting back together'? Taylor Swift will be very disappointed in you."

"I know. I know, it was wrong. It was just a moment of weakness. I swear to god it won't happen again."

Feeling guilty and conflicted after Jungkook left, you realized he might have misunderstood, thinking there was still a chance but you were still determined to not give him another one. You knew you shouldn't have done what you did that night but God did it feel good. You knew for a fact that Jungkook had already ruined you sexually for any other men or your hands or even your vibrator. You tried doing it three times after breaking up with him but not once could you bring yourself to orgasm. You just gave up after the third time, just accepted the fact that you're not going to have an orgasm ever again. People live without having orgasms right?

That is why, when Jungkook stood so close to you last night, your body seemed to betray your intentions, and you found it hard to resist him. The lingering emotions and history between you both created a pull that was difficult to ignore.

As you cleaned up the kitchen after feeding Jungkook, you hoped he would leave soon. Knowing his tendencies, you knew he would try to sneak into your bed if you went to sleep while he was still there. So, you waited for the right moment to gather enough courage to kick him out. However, Jungkook had different plans in mind. Sneaking up behind you, he cornered you against the kitchen island, catching you by surprise. The close proximity left you heavy breathed and questioning your own decision.

In the heat of the moment, everything felt like a blur, and you couldn't recall who initiated the first move or who kissed whom first. It all happened so quickly. One second he was thanking you for the dinner, and the next, he was kissing you passionately, pulling you into the moment so deeply that you momentarily forgot about the complexities of your situation. You only remember how you were so desperate that neither of you even bothered undressing completely before he thrusted deep into you on that kitchen counter. You only remember cumming as he carried you to the couch and you rode him there. You only remember him slowly laying you down on your bed and making love to you.

"You're right, Jimin. I need to be stronger. I can't let him get to me like this. You know what? Next time, I'm not even going to look at his way if he shows up."

"Yes, that's the spirit. Ignore him like all those times he ignored you while flirting with that girl from the boba place." The expression of your face immediately turned sour after hearing his words. "I'm sorry. Too soon?" You only nodded in response.

"I can't believe I kept giving him chances after chances for so long. I should've listened to you in the first place; guys like Jungkook never change," you admitted, feeling regretful for not heeding Jimin's advice earlier. Reflecting on the past, you realized that you had been hopeful that Jungkook would change, but now you understood that some people's behaviors remain consistent despite the chances they are given.

"It's still not too late." As if on cue, there were a series of knocks on your front door, and you knew all too well who it was. The familiarity of Jungkook's knocking left you feeling a mix of emotions. Gosh, was it pathetic that you could tell Jungkook from the way he knocks? "Did you order something?" Jimin asked, raising an eyebrow as he noticed the look on your face.

"No. It's Jungkook."

"How do you know."

"I know." The knocks grew more impatient.

"Should we not open the door?"

"No. Let's ignore him." You said turning up the volume of your tv.

"Baby, did you change the locks? My key's not working." Instead of asking Jungkook to give back your keys you had settled for the less agonizing option and got your locks changed.

"Let's just pretend that we're not home," you suggested to your best friend. Hoping to avoid any confrontation, you both waited until the knocks finally stopped after what seemed like five minutes. Relieved, you thought your plan had worked, and you both resumed watching the movie. Unbeknownst to you, your ex-boyfriend had other plans and was determined to come inside some other way if you didn't let him in.

Jungkook had never been one to give up easily, whether it was in sports, academics, or winning back his girlfriend. He was determined to do whatever it took to have you back in his arms. Realizing his mistakes, he was now ready to redeem himself. Jungkook had heard about grand romantic gestures that people used to prove their love, and he was determined to do the same for you. Some people run through airports to stop the love of their life, while others write a hundred letters to confess their love. In Jungkook's case, he was willing to risk his life and climb seven floors to reach you, showing the depth of his determination to make things right.

Both you and Jimin were startled as the silence was broken by loud knocks on your bedroom window. The sudden sound startled both you and Jimin as you looked at each other thinking the other might have the answer.

"Is that-?" Jimin couldn't even finish his sentence before you swiftly got up and ran towards your bedroom. It was indeed Jungkook hanging outside your bedroom window.

"Oh my god, Jungkook, are you fucking kidding me?" You quickly opened the windows, concerned that he might fall and get seriously hurt. Jimin followed you to your bedroom and raised his eyebrows at the scene in front of him. You were screaming at Jungkook while he tried to explain himself, hanging from the window.

"This is what I've always been talking about," you continued in frustration, "You always act like a fucking child, doing ridiculous things to get your way. It's just ridiculous. You can't always get whatever you want by pulling stunts like this. You could seriously get injured, you seem to have no regard for yourself or anyone else. I'm so fuc-"

"Dude, what the hell are you doing?"

"None of your business. I want to talk to my girlfriend."

"Ex girlfriend."

"I said none of your business."

"Seriously, what the hell are you doing?" This time it was you asking, exasperated, as Jungkook continued to hang from the flimsy pipe outside your window. The precarious situation he put himself in only added to your frustration and concern.

"You weren't opening the door, what was I supposed to do?"

"NOT CLIMB UP THE FUCKING WALL LIKE A CREEP?"

"Can I please come in now? I don't think I can hold on to this pipe much longer." You and Jimin quickly helped the boy inside.

"Chim, can you please wait outside? I need to talk to him," you requested, and Jimin obliged, but not before warning Jungkook not to try anything or he would kick his ass. Jimin might have been smaller than your ex in size but damn that man can fight. With Jimin gone, you turned your attention back to Jungkook, ready to confront him about his reckless behavior and demand some answers.

"Care to explain yourself?"

"Baby, I miss you. So fucking much. You have no idea."

"This is insane. You have to know you're crossing a line, Jungkook. Not only are you acting like a fucking child, you're also putting your own life in danger."

"I know, I know I'm acting crazy. But how else do I show you how much you mean to me."

"Jungkook, if I meant to you that much you wouldn't make me feel like a shit in the first place."

"And I am sorry about that. I promise to be better, I wouldn't look at another woman ever again."

"Do you realize how many times we've had this conversation? It's too many, Jungkook," you expressed, "You always say the same things, but then you repeat the same mistakes all over again. I can't keep going back to you; it's just not healthy for either of us," you firmly stated, making it clear that you were determined to break this cycle and move on from the relationship.

"Baby, pl-" he walked closer to you only for you to back away.

"And you need to stop acting like this. You can't always act on impulse, you could've seriously hurt yourself."

"It's nothing. It's not that high anyway."

"It's seven floors."

"Actually, 8. I miscalculated, and well, you might wanna avoid Mrs. Katz for a while," Jungkook admitted with a hint of amusement in his voice. Despite the seriousness of the situation, you couldn't help but laugh a little at his confession. Oh how much he had missed your laugh, he has always told you that you have the most beautiful laugh he has ever heard and to go without hearing it for more than a week? It's just torture.

"You have to leave."

"At least let-"

"No. Jungkook please, I can't do this. Not right now. You have to go," you said running your hands through your hair. "I miss you too, I really do. You have to understand that this is hard for me as well. And you doing all these things is not making anything easier. So please, for me, just leave." A single drop of tear fell down your left eye, you didn't have it in you anymore to back away as he walked toward you.

His words were sincere, and you could see the determination in his eyes. A part of you desperately wanted to give in, to feel his embrace again, but you were also afraid. Afraid of going through the same cycle, afraid of getting hurt again. The conflict between your heart and mind was tearing you apart as you stood there, facing the man you still loved, but uncertain of what to do next.

He leaned closer, and you instinctively closed your eyes, expecting a kiss, but instead, you felt a light brush of his lips against your forehead. His touch was gentle, his thumbs wiping away your tears, and his lips seemingly kissing the tension away. He stayed like that for a few seconds, leaving you with mixed emotions as he showered you with affection. And with that, he left, not sparing a glance at the man in your living room. As he walked away, you couldn't help but feel a whirlwind of emotions, torn between the love you still held for him and the need to protect yourself from potential heartache.

Like a good friend, Park Jimin didn't ask you any questions. He simply held you close, providing a comforting embrace as you sniffed against his chest all night.

*******

It's been almost a week since that conversation you had with Jungkook in your bedroom, and it's now apparent that you have a stalker. He's been following you around like a lost puppy for the better part of the week. At first, it was annoying, and you had frequent arguments with him about his behavior. But as the days passed, you've grown somewhat accustomed to his presence. Now, you mostly ignore him as he follows you around the city, giving him only the occasional side-eye before continuing with your daily routine.

Jungkook's constant presence has become both annoying and puzzling. You're not sure how he manages to track your every move or who leaked your information to him, but he seems to be everywhere. If you were riding the subway he was there sitting across you, if you were in a bar with your friends he was there scaring away all the guys that approached you, even when you were on office lunches he was sitting two tables away smiling at you. If it was anyone else it would have been creepy and you would hand them to the police but with Jungkook, sure it was annoying but also... Cute?

Sometimes he approaches you to say something or brings you flowers, while other times he simply waves at you from a distance or quietly observes you while you talk to your friends at a restaurant, much like he is doing now.

"Not to alarm you or anything but there's a really really hot but kinda creepy guy has been following us for 20 minutes now, I'm guessing more but I have only noticed him for 20," Mia was new in the city and in your office, she was also one of your only colleagues who has never seen Jungkook or didn't know who he was. Today you have taken Mia out for lunch and to show her around the city like she so politely asked you a few days ago.

"Don't look right now, but he's standing across the street, and he's looking right at you," Mia whispered, her tone laced with concern. "Should we lead him to the police station?"

Her words of concern brought a chuckle from you, which seemed to confuse Mia. The irony of the situation wasn't lost on you, as Jungkook's persistent presence had become a bizarre and somewhat amusing part of your daily life. While Mia saw him as a potential threat, you couldn't help but find his actions, however creepy they might be, somewhat endearing. You assured Mia that you could handle the situation and that there was no need to involve the police.

You turned around to see Jungkook holding a roughly wrapped bundle of sunflowers and waving at you as soon as your eyes met. Of course you didn't bother to wave back.

"Don't worry, he's... he's harmless."

"Do you know that guy?"

"Yeah... Well it wouldn't sound very good if I say it. He's my ex boyfriend."

"Oh my god. Is he stalking you? Shouldn't you report him or something?"

"Oh no, no. Like I said, Jungkook is very harmless. To others… Very harmful for himself, though," you added with a mix of concern and amusement as Jungkook clumsily ran to cross the street, narrowly avoiding getting hit by a car in the process.

As you and Mia continued walking, she looked back and forth between you and Jungkook, clearly unsure of how to react in this unusual situation. You could understand her confusion, as dealing with Jungkook's persistent presence was not something you had ever expected to be a part of your daily routine.

Jungkook finally spoke up when he got closer, saying, "I know you saw me."

"Then you must know that I'm ignoring you."

"You look gorgeous." The simple compliment caused a blush to creep up from your neck, and you couldn't help but feel a flutter of warmth in response to Jungkook's words.

"I know."

"Babe, talk to me. Then I won't bother you the whole day. I promise." Jungkook's plea made you stop in your tracks, and even the girl beside you seemed surprised by your response, as you decided to give him a moment to talk.

"Fine. Talk," you said, crossing your arms over your chest, clearly signaling your skepticism but still willing to hear him out.

"Uhhh..." Jungkook hesitated, caught off guard by your willingness to listen. He struggled to find the right words, unsure of what to say beyond the usual apologies and expressions of missing you.

"These are for you." He said offering you the sunflowers. "You love them."

"You remember that?" It was surprising honestly, you weren't expecting Jungkook to remember some minute detail you mentioned in the passing.

What's more surprising is that Jungkook's eyes not once has drifted to the girl standing awkwardly beside you. To simply say that Mia was beautiful would be the understatement of the century. She was one of the most gorgeous women you've ever laid eyes on and had the body of a goddess. Honestly she made you doubt your sexuality for a second so the fact that Jungkook didn't even spare a glance at her was really surprising. Probably because he knows you'd be watching him like a hawk if he did but still, it's progress right?

"I do."

"By the way, this is Mia. My new colleague. Mia, this is Jungkook, my boyfrie...ex-boyfriend," you corrected yourself, catching Jungkook's reaction as his face seemed to brighten momentarily at your slip.

"I would say nice to meet you if you weren't being creepy and stalking us."

"He wasn't stalking us," you said, feeling a sudden urge to defend Jungkook, even though you were trying to keep your distance from him. "Stalking is a form of harassment, and I do not feel even slightly harassed by this man. He knows me and he wanted to talk to me, so he followed me here. You have no right to call him a stalker." Both Jungkook and Mia seemed taken aback by your strong defense of him.

"Oh I'm sorry. I didn't know-"

"It's okay. Actually, there's the restaurant. I already made a reservation under my name. You should go in; I'll catch up with you in a sec," you said and Mia gave you a polite smile before walking towards the restaurant. As she left, you turned back to Jungkook and noticed his gaze fixed on you. There was no ogling of her ass as she walked away. Progress, you thought to yourself.

"What are you smiling at?"

"I love you." He said giving you those lovestruck puppy eyes.

"Shut up."

"You really do look gorgeous today," Jungkook said, and you couldn't help but look down at your simple outfit—a plain beige shirt and brown work pants. He thinks you look gorgeous in this boring ass outfit? You didn't think there was anything special about it. "You really do," he insisted. "I'm not just saying it to kiss up to you."

"What do you wanted to talk about?" you asked, brushing off his compliment and getting back to the point.

"You left some stuff at the apartment. They seem important. If you want I can bring them back to your place... or you can come by. Anytime." Your heart did drop a little. He wants you to pick your stuff up from his apartment? What happened to I'll try as long as it takes? Sure you're planning on getting those back anyway but hearing him say that... hurts a little.

"I can come pick them up. If you're around tonight. I'll also bring your key, I still have it." Why did saying it felt so official?

"Yeah cool..."

*******

Oh god it was so not cool. Jungkook was freaking the fuck out. The reality was sinking in, and it was not cool at all. You were going to pick up your stuff, and it felt like the official end was approaching. Until now, it felt like a temporary fight, where he could apologize and you'd come back to him. But now, it felt like a real breakup, and it was hitting him hard.

"Why the fuck did I have to say that? WHY THE FUCK? I'm such a fucking tool. I could have said anything, literally anything and what did I say? Pick your stuff up from my apartment. Why the fuck didn't I just get hit by that damn car instead?"

"Kook, calm down."

"What the fuck you mean calm down? She's gonna be here in two hours or something and she's gonna take the last pieces of her from this apartment and my miserable life and then she's gonna move on while I'll probably die alone because I can't ever love anybody as much as I love her." By the end of his rant all three of his hyungs were looking at him with mouth hung open.

"Bro, you've got issues."

"You think?" Jungkook sarcastically asked as he paused his pacing around the living room for a moment. Namjoon, Yoongi, and Hoseok, Jungkook's best friends, were gathered around him in the living room as the youngest ranted to them for an hour. Jungkook had called them as soon as he got back to his apartment, seeking their help to salvage the remaining pieces of his love life. True to their friendship, they all showed up within an hour. However, so far, none of them had been even slightly helpful, and Jungkook was now two bottles of wine down.

"Here's an idea," Hoseok offered. "Don't open the door when she comes here, she's gonna think you invited her and forgot, hence she can't take her stuff." All three men looked at Hoseok.

"Yes, Kook. And punch her dog while you're at it." Namjoon scoffed.

"At least I'm giving some advice. You guys are useless."

"Yes, Hobi hyung. And I appreciate that. But she already has a key she's just gonna get in and take her stuff and leave."

Yoongi finally broke his silence, offering his perspective. "You know what, JK? If she can't already see the efforts, maybe she's not worth it. You already spent a week following her around like a puppy, and she doesn't have the decency to acknowledge your efforts?" His words held a hint of frustration, clearly disappointed in your lack of response to Jungkook's attempts to win you back.

"She has every right to be mad at me. I was a horrible boyfriend. A week is nothing, even if it takes a year I'm still gonna try to do everything I can. And what efforts? All I've done is stalk her around, probably even made her uncomfortable."

"I agree with Yoongi, Jungkook. Maybe it's a sign that you should consider moving on," Namjoon gently suggested, feeling sympathy for his young friend. He had never seen Jungkook so frustrated and heartbroken before; usually, he has always been the life of the party, bringing joy to everyone around him. Witnessing him like this was truly disheartening.

"No, you guys don't understand. I love her. You know why I was always carefree about the future? Because I always knew it was her, I don't care what I do or what I am as long as its with her. She's it for me and I want her by my side for my whole life. I want to be hers more than I want to be anything. I want children, I want a dog, I want a marriage, I want everything with her and if she's not in the future I don't know what I am anymore. I don't know who I am without her." Jungkook's monologue has left everyone speechless and in awe.

"Dude you wanna get married? I never pegged you to be the one to get married?"

"Not right away but in the future, yes. Only if it's to her tho. I don't want anyone else."

"Wow... Never thought Jeon Jungkook would have children in his future." Yoongi knew him the longest and all through his fuckboy phase so it was hardest to digest for Yoongi.

"Well not anymore. The mother of my children wants a divorce."

"Did you say all that to her?" asked Namjoon.

"What?"

"That little speech you just gave? Does she know all that?"

"No... I guess we never got to talk about all those things. I realised all this after the break up anyway."

"Then tell her. Tell her everything you just said, exactly how you said it."

It was easier said than done. You arrived with a knock on his door an hour after the boys left. An hour which Jungkook spent cleaning every surface of his apartment so you wouldn't notice how pathetic his life has gotten after you left.

Upon seeing you walk into his apartment, Jungkook's mouth went dry. He couldn't help but notice how effortlessly beautiful you looked, even in the simplest of outfits. He still has no idea how you manage to look so beautiful in the dullest outfits ever. Your dress modestly covered your legs, and your top had a conservative neckline, not even a hint of cleavage was seen yet you still managed to radiate a captivating charm.

You were also wearing little to no makeup. He did not want to be one of those boyfriends who bragged about their girlfriends looking pretty without makeup but if it was a compitition he'd win. If situations was different he would have made a joke about you going to the church but he stops himself.

"You want some wine?" Jungkook asked.

"Sure. Did you clean the place?"

"Uh...oh yeah. Just a little." He replied pouring wine in two glasses and brought them out to you. You had to mentally remind yourself that this wasn't a romantic date; you were just here to pick up your belongings. Being back in his apartment after such a long time stirred up mixed emotions, and you couldn't help but feel your heart racing.

You took a sip of the wine, only to find it tasted terrible, and you immediately spit it out, making a disgusted face.

"Oh my god, is this the wine we tried making at home?"

"Yes."

"It's awful," you said, both of you bursting into laughter. "Oh my god, why do you still have this? Throw it out, it's literally trash."

"Nah… I like it sometimes… it goes well with that cheese you tried making," he said with a playful grin, recalling a failed culinary experiment from your past. The two of you shared a knowing look, the memories of your shared moments flooding back.

"Noooo that's disgusting... I can't believe you still eat that." You continued laughing. Ok focus, you're not here to have fun.

"Only sometimes... when I miss you." He said and your laughs stopped. "Baby I-"

"So? Where is all my thing?" You ask, completely ignoring the nickname.

"I'm sorry I didn't pack anything." Because I don't want to let you go. "Some of your clothes are still in the laundry room. We can start there." You headed to the compact laundry room, which was conveniently connected to his bathroom. Jungkook trailed behind you in silence as you began sifting through the sizable laundry baskets, searching for your clothes among the various items.

The atmosphere was a mix of awkwardness and nostalgia. Memories of the times you spent together flooded your mind as you touched the familiar fabrics. You tried your best to focus on the task at hand and not get lost in emotions that might cloud your judgment.

"Koo, you mixed up the dirty and clean basket again," you said, using the old nickname almost instinctively. Jungkook's ears perked up, and he couldn't help but notice the fondness in your voice as you gently pointed out his little mistake.

"Did I?"

"Yeah. Blue one is for the dirty laundry, and the white one is for the washed clothes. You mixed them all up, and now you'll have to wash 'em again," you said, teasingly holding up a definitely used Calvin Klein underwear from the clean laundry basket. It felt oddly domestic, and a sense of nostalgia washed over you. Part of you wanted to spend a little more time just doing this with him, the way you used to when you were together.

"Did you try washing my clothes?" You asked picking up your white, well now pink t shirt with your hands.

"I wanted to do something nice."

"That's sweet of you, but there's a reason I told you not to do the laundries. I do the laundries and you do…" You paused, catching yourself before you continued talking as if you were still a couple. It was a slip, and you needed to remind yourself of the reality. You were here to pack your clothes and leave, not to discuss how to divide chores between couples.

"Well you're not here anymore. So I do the laundries and I do the dishes."

"Right... I'll seperate my clothes and then pack them." As you started sorting through the clothes, memories flooded back when your hands grabbed a certain grey t-shirt. Tears welled up in your eyes, that t-shirt held significant meaning in your relationship. It was the first time you stayed at Jungkook's place, and he had given you that t-shirt to wear. You loved it so fucking much that you still wore it often. It represented a sweet and intimate moment between the two of you. Despite the emotions it stirred, you simply placed the t-shirt in his pile of clothes.

"What are you doing? That's your t shirt." He picked it up to put it back in your pile.

"No, it's yours."

"Yes but I gave it to you because you love it."

"Well we're not a couple anymore so I'm giving it back. How are we supposed to move on if-"

"Why are you so fixated on that?"

"On what?"

"On moving on." This was the first time after the break up you were seeing a glimmer of anger in Jungkook's eyes as he walked around the counter to come to your side.

"Well we have to move on, don't we? We can't keep living in the past."

"It's not the past yet. I still love you and you still love me. And don't you fucking say that you don't. Because you do."

"Well it doesn't matter. Love is not enough to work a relationship, Jungkook. We are not compatible."

"And who decided that? You? You suddenly know everything about compatibility?"

"Can't you see? We are fucking fighting over a fucking t shirt."

"No it's not about a t-shirt, we are fighting over the fact that you're giving up on our 3 years relationship so easily like it meant nothing to you."

"Easily? Do you think any of this is easy for me, Jungkook? Do you think I just want to fucking break your heart because I just want to give up? Do you have any idea how much courage it took for me to fucking walk into this apartment just to walk out for your life?"

"Well you could have fooled me. It sure as hell look like you don't give a flying fuck about us right now?"

"I don't give a fuck? How dare you say that? I have given the most fucks about this relationship out of the two of us." Your voices raised in intensity as you found yourselves in close proximity, chests nearly touching, and only a few inches of space between your faces. Despite the heated argument, you couldn't help but notice how his chest was heaving from all the emotions, and how strikingly handsome he looked tonight.

Jungkook was so angry that he had no idea what he was saying anymore. He was just venting his frustration and shouting whatever came to mind in the heat of the moment. But your mind had drifted away from deciphering his words. Instead, you found yourself fixated on his lips, the way the little freckle moved up and down with his lips, and how his hands gestured frantically as he tried to make his point. The intensity of the moment seemed to fade away, and you were lost in the small details that had once been so familiar to you.

"You know what? You're such a hypocrite. You've nagged me all this time for not making efforts, and now you don't even acknowledge any of them. Do you have any idea how cruel you are-?" Unlike last time, this time you remember who made the first move. You took him by surprise, grabbing his gray hoodie to pull him closer. It was you who pulled him down and pressed his lips against your own. The kiss was intense, filled with a mixture of frustration, love, and longing. In that moment, all the pent-up emotions seemed to find release, and you found yourself melting into each other's embrace, at least for a brief moment.

Jungkook doesn't know what the hell took over you, but he sure as hell wasn't complaining. No. It only took him a mere second to acknowledge the situation, but once he did, his arms were already around your waist, pulling you closer than physically possible. The intensity of the moment, the rush of emotions, it all felt overwhelming and right at the same time. The world seemed to fade away as you both embraced, holding on tightly to each other as if afraid to let go. It was a moment of surrender, a moment of pure vulnerability, and for that moment, everything else ceased to exist.

The silent laundry room filled up with the sound of lips smacking each other. And both of you trying to breath between your kisses. Kissing Jungkook has always been a treat in itself, you have had your fair share of lovers before Jungkook but none of them had ever kissed you like he did. Kissing with them was always sort of a task that you would have to go through until both of your clothes were off but not with him. With him kissing itself was such an amazing experience, you could and you had spent hours just kissing those lips, that's how good of a kisser Jungkook was.

Jungkook didn't only kiss with his lips; he kissed with his whole body. His hands explored every inch of your skin that was available to him. One hand was tracing the curve of your hips while the other moved up your back, sending shivers down your spine. The gentle squeeze of his hand on your ass elicited soft moans from you, and you felt your body responding to his touch in all the ways it used to when you were together. The physical connection between you two was undeniable, and it was as if no time had passed since your last intimate encounter.

Without breaking your kisses for a second, Jungkook swiftly picked you up and placed you on the counter, not caring that the laundry baskets fell to the floor. The kisses became more desperate and fervent, his tongue demanding authority inside your mouth. It was as if all the pent-up emotions and desires from the past week were being unleashed in this passionate moment, and neither of you could resist the pull of each other's lips and bodies.

"Wait, wait," You pulled away, panting with droopy eyes from the intensity of the moment. Your small hands gently pushed against his chest when he tried to lean in again. "What are we doing?" you asked, seeking clarity amidst the intoxicating rush of emotions and desire.

"I think, I think we are making out."

"No I mean... I'm not here to do this. This is not right."

"Who cares?" Jungkook shrugged, capturing your lips in another kiss. One much shorter than the previous.

"I do."

"Do you want this?"

"I do...but-" you were cut off by his plump lips.

"Let's talk about it later then... I miss you."

"I miss you too," you whispered, giving in to the overwhelming emotions and desires that filled the air between you both. With those words, you granted Jungkook the permission he needed to take things further. In that moment, you embraced the vulnerability of being human, unable to resist the pull of his charm and the way his body ignited your own.

His hands eagerly roamed along your back, searching for the zipper that must be hidden somewhere on the dress. His touch sent shivers down your spine, and your breath hitched as you felt his fingers deftly find the zipper's pull. The anticipation of what was to come next filled the air, and time seemed to slow down as he slowly, teasingly, pulled the zipper down.

"How was the meeting with the reverend?" He finally made the joke he had been dying to say all evening, making you smack his chest slightly

"Shut up. I thought if I didn't look hot, I'd make it easy on you." you playfully responded, justifying your choice of the dark green dress that covered most of your body.

"Are you kidding me? You can never not look hot. You are feeding my sexy liberarian fantasies." Ignoring his comment you started unzipping his gray hoodie revealing the white wife beater underneath.

"Meals you can skip, gym you can't?" You commented admiring the muscles adorning his shoulders chest and biceps. You shivered when his hand suddenly reached under your dress to caress your bare thighs. Close to your core which you were sure was practically drenched now.

"Can I take this off?" All you could do was nod in response and he ripped your dress off of you in mere seconds. "Gosh, baby, you're so beautiful." Jungkook whispered looking at your mismatched pair of cotton underwear. "Look at you... dripping already. You got this wet just with my kisses?" You shook your head in agreement as he gaped at your clothed pussy. A very noticeable and big patch of wetness covering your panties right at the centre. "I missed playing with your pussy so much. Did it miss me too, Baby?" Once again all you could do was nod when his fingers slowly started tracing shape on your clit. "Words, sweetheart."

"Yes... it missed you. Please do something, Koo." The way you mewled out the words sent blood rushing towards his already hard cock. That was all the encouragement he needed to push your panties to the side. His face lit up at the sight of your dewy folds. Slick dripping between the slit.

"What do you want first?"

"Fingers. I want your fingers." Jungkook quickly moved to take off his rings but you stopped him. "Fuck me with them." Jungkook almost came at your words, you never told him before that you liked getting off with his rings.

"You like the cold metal?" You couldn't answer the question as he started playing with the bundle of nerves, pinching it occasionally. All your words turned into whimpers. "Look your pussy baby. Begging of my fingers." He smirked before slowly entering your folds with his middle fingers.

"Ah... baby." You shakily reach out with your hand to bring his face near your chest. He seemed to understand the assignment as he quickly started nibbling at the skin of your breast, pulling down the cups to release your nipples which were now hard like pebbles.

Jungkook had a way of eliciting reactions from you as if it were the first time every time, despite having experienced it countless times over the past three years. It amazed you how he could still have such an impact on you after all this time.

"I missed having your tits on my face." Jungkook murmured before quickly taking one in his mouth. You moaned out incoherent words when his ring finger joined his middle finger inside your cunt. Thumb rubbing slow circles on your clit. Your hands found solace in Jungkook's hair as he continued leaving kisses all across your chest.

You let out a tiny whimper in protest when his fingers pulled out from you. He brought them up to his lips and gave them a suck, eyes looking deeply in your half closed once.

"Shhh don't worry, baby. I just want more access." You understood what he meant when he pulled you up easily with one hand to take off your panties and throwing it somewhere in the laundry room. "You know, you taste just as sweet as day one." He picked up some of your slick on his fingers and brought them closer to your lips. "Taste baby, taste how devine you are." You took his fingers in your mouth and sucked them clean. Jungkook's cock was now as hard as a rock. He quickly took one of your hands and guided them to his clothed boner in order to get some relief. Like muscle memory your your hands quickly started working on his crotch. Squeezing it just the right amount.

"Wanna suck your cock." You quickly said.

"Later. Let me have this cunt for now." He quickly bent down on his knees to swipe his tongue up your slit pulling out a sudden loud moan from you. "Yes baby. Keep screaming." He said before leaning forward and getting to work, lapping at your juices like a dog dying from thirst.

His two long fingers went back inside your seeping hole as his tongue started flicking your clit. His free hand grabbed your thigh and put it on his shoulder. You were halfway hanging from the counter and practically sitting on Jungkook's face. Jungkook on the other hand was in his heaven right now. Imagine two of the most favourite things to mankind, ass and pussy and then imagine being buried in them, Jungkook thought if he died right now right here, it would be the best death.

Your hips started moving in circular motion as you ground your pussy against his face. Hands tugging at his raven locks. His nose occasionally bumped against your clit. You looked down at the scene in front of you, Jungkook's eyes looking up at you and his mouth ate away at your pussy. The look of his face trapped between your thighs was so filthy that you almost came from it only.

His tongue had now replaced your fingers in poking and prodding inside your walls. His hand came around your hips to rub at your clit.

Jungkook loved eating your pussy and it showed. The way his eyes closed in pleasure only by bringing you close to your orgasm. He was a very selfless lover, he found pleasure in pleasing you and he could spend days licking your juices and playing with your pussy. Right now his goal was to make you cum, if you squirt then it would be a bonus.

"I'm close, Koo. Lick my clit please." And like the always obedient lover, he did. Fingers parting your pussy lips and tongue getting back to licking the bundle of nerves, lips wrapping around it to give it a suck now and then. The sounds you were making were pornographic to say the least. You were sure you sounded like one of those girls making high pitched noises in the porn videos but you couldn't help it. Jungkook made you behave like a whore and you loved it. You loved screaming his name and you loved making these obscene sounds, and Jungkook loved it even more.

"Koo, I'm cumming." You cried out. He started licking even faster at your words, helping you reach the high faster. His heart jumped with joy when he saw the juices coming out of you. He did it, he made you squirt. Your legs quivered around him as you came down from his high. He didn't stop there. He licked you until you were clean and drank every single droplet of your arousal. You were shaking from the orgasm and the oversensitivity you felt in your pussy.

With one last kiss to the hood of your clit Jungkook came up and you immediately pulled him in for a kiss. You were determined to pleasure him like he did you. Shaking hands fidgeting with his clothes as you tugged at his lip ring with your teeth.

"Slow down baby." He helped you take of his wife beater.

"Can't. Want your cock." You were once again drunk on arousal. Your hands worked as quick as they could after that earth shattering orgasm to pull out his cock from his sweatpants. Mouth watering at the sight once it finally did.

Jungkook had the most beautiful and delicious cock you have ever seen. It was long and thick with just the perfect mushroom tip, which was now swollen and red and leaking from precum. The veins in his cock were imitating the veins on his arms, ready to pop any minute. Your thumb already started doing its job by spreading the precum all over his tip.

The groan he let out as your hand played with his cock was very loud. Almost as if giving you a warning.

"Is baby a cockslut?" He asked, reaching out to trace your lips with his tumba. The same thumb that was rubbing your clit only a minute ago.

"Only for you."

"Yes. Only mine."

"Wanna suck your cock." You pleaded once again.

"Go ahead, babygirl. Do whatever you want." You took that as permission to sink down on your knees and come face to face with his throbbing penis which was begging for your attention. Your hands stroked him slowly up and down and tongue came out to tease the top. "Don't tease, baby." You giggles once he used his heavy tip slap you slightly.

You looked up at him, making the most innocent face as you collected some spit in your mouth and then spit on his cock to lather it up with some slick. You slowly took the warm tip in your mouth, swirling your tongue around it like a lollipop.

"Just like that, babe." Jungkook sighed out and his words arrange you to take him in inch by inch until he was in your throat. One of your hands came up to play with his balls. His moans were now louder working as your inspiration to please him more. You loved the way he said your name. Moaned your name like you were some goddess that he was praying to.

Your head started bobbing up and down as you took him in and out of your mouth. Tongue continuously playing with the warm slit on tip of his cock.

"Fuck my mouth." You said once you took him out completely.

"You sure?" You only responded with a nod and that was all the answer that he needed to grab the back of your head and start thrusting in your mouth. You angled your teeth in a way you knew he loved. In a way that they grazed his shaft enough to feel but not enough to hurt. His tip was bumping at the back of your throat as one of your hand kept playing with his balls.

He pulled out of your mouth too soon to your liking and you gave him a questioning look.

"I'll cum if we kept going. I wanna cum in your pussy." Jungkook did not take one more second to pull you up and bend you against the counter. Fingers once again playing with your entrence to make sure you were wet enough to enter. "Look at you. You are wet again already, baby. Such a fucking whore." Although his words might have offended you naturally but right now they just added to your arousal. "My little whore wants to get fucked?" His hands digging in the flesh of your ass, slapping it to make it jiggle.

"Yes, Kookie. Please, fuck me." You begged, splayed out on your front on the cold counter. His cock was running along your pussy, poking in your slit but not really entering. "Stop teasing me you, asshole." You screamed earning a chuckle from the man behind you.

"This is what you get for being so mean to me." The loud smack that came at the flesh of your ass was very unexpected. "Tell me you forgive me and I'll fuck you." He bargained.

"No." Another smack making you yelp out from pleasure and pain. Your cunt once again was dripping from your arousal and this asshole was doing absolutely nothing about it. Wasn't he turned on too?

"Say or I won't fuck you."

"You're an asshole"

"That's not the answer."

"Fine. I forgive you. Just fuck me, please." Jungkook laughed at the way you begged.

"See. It wasn't that hard." He finally sink into you. A synchronised moan escaped the both of you once he was completely inside. "So warm and tight, baby. The best pussy ever."

"Jungkook, faster." You moaned and he obliged instantly. Your ass jiggling as he started snapping into you in a fast rhythm. His cock was hitting you in all the right places, he had found your g-spot instantly. One of his hands sneaked to the front to rub your clit as the other pulled you back and held you against his chest.

You hiked one of your legs up on the counter to get better angle and feel all of him in all the right places. Jungkook kept grunting in your ear, letting out words of encouragement, telling you how good you were holding up and how wonderful your pussy was.

Your breast bounced up and down as he pulled out of you and pushed in with equal force. His fingers kept rubbing and flicking your clit side to side and soon you were close to your climax.

"Jungkook I'm close."

"Hold it."

"Can't," you were cut off by your own moan at another hit against your g spot. "Can't hold it for long."

"Just for a little, baby. I'm close too." His hand turns your jaw sideways to capture your lips, drinking all of your moans. Just a few thrusts of his later he was almost there. "On the count of 3, ok baby?" You nodded against his lips.

"One." He slapped your clit, earning a loud moan from you.

"Two." His hand tucked and pinched at your nipples.

"Three." With one final thrust the both of you came down from your climax with a loud scream.

"Oh god I love you. I love you so much baby." Jungkook said as his seeds filled your pussy up to the brim.

*******

"What are you doing?" Jungkook looked at you confusingly as you pulled on your clothes 15 minutes after having sex with him. Although he did clean you up there was still some of his cum inside you right now.

"I can't go out naked."

"Why do you have to go out?"

"Because I don't live here? We are still broken up, Jungkook." Your words hit him like a ton of bricks.

"What? But we... we just had sex... you said you forgave me."

"Don't act like you never said anything to get whatever you want." You said looking for your panties. "Where the fuck are my panties?"

"What do you m- did you just say that to have sex with me?" He said as you looked for another pair of panties in the laundry basket. "I feel so used right now."

"Don't be dramatic."

"But baby... I thought we made up. Please don't leave now."

"Jungkook... You want to win me back? Do it without sex. The sex was amazing but I'm sorry it did not solve anything. I still feel the same and you still haven't gave me any assurance."

"So we're still broken up?"

"Yes. I'll pickup my things some other time. I'm leaving." He sighed knowing there was no point in arguing. You were nothing if not stubborn.

"At least let me drop you off. It's getting late."

"It's ok. I called Taehyung when you were in the bathroom. He's already outside probably." You said, checking the time in you wrist watch.

"Fucking Taehyung." Jungkook muttered under his breath.

"Bye, Jungkook. Don't torture yourself, please."

*******

"Oh the walk of shame." Taehyung teased you when you walked out of a certain apartment building to his awaiting car.

"Shut up, Tae. If I wanted to be judged, I'd have called Jimin." Taehyung was your other best friend, and although you hadn't known each other for long, he quickly warmed his way into your heart. Ironically, you met Taehyung through Jungkook; he was Namjoon's cousin. However, now he was closer to you and Jimin than he was to Jungkook. You first met Taehyung at a club where Jungkook had dragged you with his office friends. Despite hitting on you initially, he politely backed off when you declined, and you both ended up spending the rest of the night talking and bonding over feeling neglected by the people who dragged you to the club.

"He's going to have field day with this." Taehyung chuckled as he drove away from the building.

"That's why we're not telling him."

"Fine by me, if you think you can lie to him."

"Oh god. What did I do?"

"Look, babe. I don't know what to say, you clearly still love him and he's clearly still obsessed with you. You are only torturing yourself by trying to stay away from him."

"I just... It's not enough you know. I know he loves me, more than anything but if I get back with him who's to say a week later he just won't go back to his usual self? I'm just scared Taehyung, I just don't want to get hurt. I don't want to be one of those women in the future who just sits at home and waits for her husband while he's out their flirting with a waitress or something."

"I just hope you'd stop hurting. Nothing else." He gave you a sympathetic smile and held your hand for the whole drive.

*******

Life can be cruel, and it seemed like the universe wasn't on your side. You want something so much and when you'd finally have it, you don't want it anymore. You had wanted space from Jungkook and asked for it repeatedly, but now that he had given you that space for the past six days, you couldn't shake the feeling that something significant was missing from your life. It was as if a big piece of your heart was absent, and you found yourself longing for his presence once again.

Six days had passed since you left Jungkook's place in Taehyung's car, and during that time, he hadn't reached out to you even once. There were no phone calls, no text messages, and no unexpected appearances at random places. It felt strange and unfamiliar not having him actively pursuing you, and it only added to the confusion and uncertainty swirling in your mind.

Every time you made a turn or entered a cafe, a part of you half-expected Jungkook to be there, waving at you with that familiar, endearing smile on his face. But each time, you found yourself disappointed as there was no sign of him. The absence of his constant presence was both a relief and a pang of longing, leaving you torn between wanting to move on and wanting him to come back into your life.

Wasn't this what you wanted? For him to stop obsessing over you and move on with his life? However, now that he had seemingly taken a step back, you couldn't help but feel a mix of emotions. A part of you wanted him to fight for you, to prove that he was willing to change and make things work. Another part of you longed for his familiar presence and the comfort that came with it.

"Did you hear any of the words I just said?" Mia asked you and you gave her a guilty smile.

"I'm sorry, I'm a little preoccupied today."

"Is this about Jungkook again?"

"I'm so sorry... I think this is a very bad idea. I really don't want to disrespect your friend." When Mia suggested the double date with her boyfriend and their friend a few days ago you were very skeptical about it. You didn't want to get into anything right now with the mess that your head was but after discussing it with Jimin and Taehyung, they convinced you that you should go, to take your mind off of things for a bit. Double dates are nothing serious, it was just a way to lighten up your mood. Although now you were regretting the whole ordeal. You shouldn't have come here. Not only was your mood very sour but it was also very evident on your face.

"Oh no. You wouldn't. Trust me. Actually the thing is Chris is going through a bad breakup as well and Jisung and I thought you could, you know help each other out or something."

"That's very sweet of you, Mia. But you sure I wouldn't ruin the whole thing?"

"Oh don't worry at all. And even if it does not go well nothing will be ruined between us. We'll laugh about it later." You gave her a grateful smile when she rubbed your hands.

A few seconds later, the bell of the restaurant rang, and two very attractive men walked in. As the woman beside you stood up, you realized that they were your dates. Mia quickly introduced you to her boyfriend Jisung and your date Chris. You were relieved that Chris wasn't at least horrible looking, and you hoped you could get through this one date.

"Wow, they did not mention how beautiful you are," Chris said as he shook your hand and took the seat in front of you. You couldn't help but wonder how many times he used this line, but then you reminded yourself that not every guy is a player. For all you know, Chris could be a very sweet guy who was genuinely complimenting you.

"Thank you, that's very kind of you," you replied with a polite smile. "You don't look so bad yourself."

As the conversation flowed, you found yourself getting more comfortable around Chris. He was easy to talk to, which helped lighten your mood. But despite being a genuinely sweet guy, you couldn't help but compare Chris to Jungkook. Whether it was the way he spoke, sat, or even called for the waiter, Chris lacked the same level of confidence that Jungkook possessed. Even on your first date, Jungkook had a way of making you feel like you had known him forever.

You observed that Chris couldn't hold a candle to Jungkook when it came to a sense of humor. While Jungkook was effortlessly funny, Chris tended to build up to a joke too much, and it often fell flat, leaving you with no choice but to give him pity laughs.

You had to consciously remind yourself to stop comparing this man to your ex boyfriend. Chris might not be as funny, or confident, or curious, or smart, or handsome, or cute, or witty, or energetic, or adventurous, or a good wine orderer as Jungkook but he was still a decent person. Perhaps, if you gave him a chance, things could potentially go well. It was essential to keep an open mind and not let your past experiences cloud your judgment.

The mention of your name from the man in front of you snapped you out of your train of thoughts. "So, tell me something about yourself," he said, and you suddenly realized that all three pairs of eyes were expectantly on you. Not knowing exactly what to say, you started talking about your work. With Jungkook, this was never an issue; conversation always flowed effortlessly, even in the early stages of your relationship.

"Oh… um well, I recently got promoted to a junior copywriter in our advertising company," you replied, giving him a small smile.

"No none of the boring work stuff. Tell me about yourself. What are your interests?" he asked, and you were slightly surprised by his directness. Didn't Mia mention he was going through a breakup as well? Must have been one happy breakup if he was still so cheerful.

"I... I like horror movies."

"Oh, I can't stand horror movies," Chris replied. Jungkook, on the other hand, loved horror movies. Every weekend, the two of you would go watch horror films or shows and then mock the scary scenes together. He adored seeing you jump at the jump scares and relished the opportunity to hold you close in his arms to "console" you.

"Then what kind of movies do you like?"

"I'm more into non-fiction and political cinema, and occasionally documentaries," he said. His response didn't exactly excite you, and you wondered if he was just trying to impress you or if his taste in movies was genuinely that dull. If it was the former he was doing a very bad job.

"Prude," Mia's boyfriend, Jisung, let out a cough, and it actually made you laugh, realizing it might be the first time you've genuinely laughed during this date. Normally, Jungkook would have already… No, no more thinking about Jungkook.

"I think it's adorable that Chris gets his jollies from 'our planet'." You laughed again, finding some amusement in the conversation. This date might end up being a little more bearable after all.

Finding an opening, you slipped into a conversation with Mia and Jisung instead of focusing solely on Chris. You couldn't help but awe at how adorable of a couple Mia and Jisung were. They recently celebrated their 1-year anniversary. Jisung was much younger but despite the age difference, they seemed so happy and in love. They reminded you so much of you and Jungkook. While Jungkook might not have been younger than you, he was definitely the more mischievous and playful one in the relationship, while you tended to be more responsible and level-headed.

"Do you happen to know the guy sitting behind you? Because he has been glaring at me like I just stole his kids and traded them for wool," Chris said, catching Mia's attention first. She turned around, and you followed suit, curious to see who was giving Chris such a fierce look.

To your surprise, it was none other than Jeon Jungkook sitting at the table behind you, and he wasn't alone. Yoongi, Hoseok, and Namjoon were with him. Your heart skipped a beat when your eyes met his, and a myriad of emotions surged through you, but one was the most overwhelming of them all. Guilt.

Regret washed over you as you realized the impact your decision to go on this date had on Jungkook. His hurt expression tugged at your heartstrings, and you couldn't help but feel guilty for putting yourself in this situation. It was clear that this double date was a mistake, and you were left grappling with your emotions and the consequences of your choices.

Feeling overwhelmed and needing a moment alone, you excused yourself from the table without waiting for any response from the others. You rushed through the restaurant, trying to find a washroom where you could collect your thoughts and emotions. The encounter with Jungkook had caught you off guard, and you couldn't help but wonder if he had intentionally come here like he did that past week or if it was just actually a coincidence.

"So we're dating other people now?" He sounded hurt when he stepped in behind you in the restroom.

"Kook, this is not what it looks like."

"I'm not mad. I'm just surprised."

"You're not?"

"Maybe a little."

"Where were you for the past six days?" You turned the question on him.

"So I disappear for a week and you start dating someone else. Thought it would take at least 30 days to move on from a 3 year relationship." His remark was bitter but you knew where he came from.

"Kook, it's not what it looks like," you said, stepping closer to him, feeling the need to explain yourself even though you knew you didn't owe him anything. After all, you were not together anymore, and it had been almost three weeks since the breakup.

"By the way I didn't disappear because I was giving up on us. I was just trying to give you some space. Our friends forced me to give you some space," He said "I wouldn't have if I knew..."

"Jungkook,"

"What's his name?"

"Don't do this to yourself."

"What does he do? I mean we can still be friends right? I know it-" you cut of his words by pressing your lips against his in a very soft kiss.

"Koo, you presence was not so insignificant in my life that I'd forget you in a week." Your words brought a hint of smile on his lips. He let out a sigh in relief.

"Oh thank God, I thought I lost you to that leprechaun."

"Hey," you scolded him. "I swear to god if you pick a fight with him on the way out, I'll whoop your ass."

"That would be so hot." There he was. Your precious Jungkook.

"But we're still not back together." The smile left his face as soon as it came. "Kook... I'm still not yours but... Make me. I'm willing to give you another chance but... You have to assure me that it will be worth it. Win me back and I'm yours."

"I will, baby. I'll show you how devoted I am." With one last kiss on your lips he left the restroom.

As Jungkook left the restroom with a newfound sense of hope and determination, you couldn't help but smile at his enthusiasm. It was like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders, and he was ready to face the challenge of winning you back with all his heart.

As you returned to the table, Mia and Chris looked at you curiously. "Is everything okay?" Mia asked with concern.

You nodded, a small smile playing on your lips. "Yeah, everything's fine. Just had a little chat."

Chris raised an eyebrow playfully. "A little chat, huh? Well, I hope it was a good one."

You glanced back at the restroom door, feeling a mix of emotions inside you. "Yeah, it was," you replied, your heart a little lighter than before.

*******

And the cycle began anew on the following day. The affectionate text messages resumed, starting from the sweet 'good morning' greetings to heartfelt 'I love you's. You received a bouquet of a 100 sunflowers on your desk with a note that only read 'because roses are cliche'. He sent boba at your office because you hated coffee and he sent you sushi's from your favourite restaurant.

It was like a cycle. Once again he was following you around the city but this time you didn't roll your eyes at him, didn't cuss him out or ask him to leave you alone. You even heard from Jimin and Taehyung that Jungkook deleted his Snapchat and Instagram. Jimin was the most shocked one at the news. 'Oh my god is Jungkook actually trying to redeem himself?'

You laughed as Jungkook ran after your subway because he was a minute too late and couldn't get in as it left the station. But like the lovely ex-girlfriend you were you decided to get off on the next station to wait for him. And like you expected 10 minutes later a you saw Jungkook running down the stairs, eyes looking for you. Quickly running up to you when he found you.

"Did you run here?" He didn't answer you but only because he was too busy catching his breath.

"There are trains only two minutes apart."

"I...I know that" He said between catching his breath. "But that... would not... have been very romantic."

"And what if I didn't get off at this station."

"I would run to your office."

"You're crazy."

"Only for you."

One more week goes by with Jungkook showing you in every way how much you mean to him. You were finally starting to get the assurance and security that you have always craved for your relationship. You were finally starting to see the depths of Jungkook's devotion. The smile on your face now was just a constant. And there were only two reasons for it, Jungkook and thoughts of Jungkook.

"So, how's everything going with your crazy stalker ex?" One night Jimin playfully commented when you him and Taehyung were spending it at your place.

"Don't call him crazy."

"Fine. How's your completely sane stalker ex?" You only roll your eyes but soon started smiling widely. "Oh my god guys... He's the sweetest. I don't think I've seen him putting this much efforts in to anything like ever."

"Yeah, Namjoon says he's so whipped for you that it's disgusting." Taehyung's comment makes you blush. "So? When are you getting back together with him."

"I don't know. I mean I know. But, I don't know, should I initiate it? Should I wait for him to ask me again? Should I ask him to ask me again?"

"Don't think too much about it. If you wanna be with him, be with him." Taehyung being the ever level headed one said.

"I say make him work some more. That man had you going crazy for three years, the least jail time he deserves is three months." Jimin said sipping on his margarita.

"Don't listen to, Jimin. In fact call him right now."

"No, don't call him right now. This is our night. Don't be a simp."

"Did you guys bet against me and Jungkook?" You asked looking between both of your friends who looked like deers caught in a headlight. "Who else?"

"Just Jimin and I... and Namjoon and Yoongi and Hoseok." You gasped dramatically at your unbelievable friends.

"If either of you win, I want my cut."

The next day you were surprised to not see the usual series of morning texts that you get from Jungkook. There were no flowers outside your doorstep or your desk. Nobody sent you boba or lunch and you could say that you were having a very Jungkook less day today. The lack of your cute stalker ex has taken a toll on your mood and you found yourself becoming increasingly snappy and cranky with others, unable to shake off the disappointment and longing for his attention. This made you realise how much accustomed you have become to Jungkook.

You looked longingly at your phone but there was nothing, still no text, no calls. You could always be the mature one and call him to see what was the matter but a part of you hesitated, not wanting to appear too eager or like you were desperately missing him. After all, he had been the one pursuing you, and you didn't want to reverse those roles.

Soon it was time to get off from work, and with a series of goodbyes and good evenings you quickly left your office, You couldn't help but wonder if Jungkook would be waiting for you outside, just like he used to do. However, as you stepped out, there was no sign of him, and the reality sank in that he wasn't there. Still holding onto a glimmer of hope, you decided to wait for a little while, thinking he might show up a bit late. You stood there, keeping an eye out for any sign of him, and time seemed to slow down. Every passing minute felt like an eternity, and you were torn between staying and leaving.

Soon the guard to the building adviced you to leave saying that their was a big storm on the way. You quickly looked up the weather forecast to realise that he was right indeed. You looked up at the sky to see the angry black clouds had started to gather around.

Searching for his contact you finally decided to give him a call. You were seriously getting worried about Jungkook now. As the call went straight to voicemail, your worry for Jungkook intensified.

Deciding it was the only choice, you headed towards Jungkook's place instead of your own, opting for a cab over the subway to reach him quickly.

Your excitement soared when your phone finally rang after a long day of silence. But, it quickly turned to disappointment as you noticed an unknown number instead of the one you had been eagerly waiting for. Despite the uncertainty, you chose to answer the call, just in case it was something important.

The voice asking for you on the other side was definitely unknown.

"Yes this is she." You replied.

"I'm speaking from Hope Memorial Hospital. You are listed as an emergency contact for a Jeon Jungkook. He has been involved in a motorcycle crash, and it's a very serious accident. We urgently need a guardian. Are you able to assist, or could you direct us to someone else?" The voice on the other end was serious and panicked, but you found it hard to accept the gravity of the situation. Your heart pounded in your chest, and tears streamed down your face, hoping that it wasn't as critical as it sounded.

"No, it's okay. I'll be there in... 10 minutes," you replied, your voice shaky but determined. You swiftly instructed the cab driver to change the route, urging him to go faster as you anxiously bit your nails in anticipation.

During the ride, you tried to stay strong and reassure yourself that it might not be as critical as you feared. Your mind couldn't help but drift to the worst-case scenario. What if he was already... No, no, no, you couldn't bear to think that way. You pushed those thoughts aside, trying to stay positive and hopeful as you rushed towards the hospital.

The driver observed you with sympathy as you quietly wept in the back seat. Regret filled your heart as you realized you should have called him. You blamed yourself, thinking that it was all your fault, and if anything happened to him, it would be on you.

As the car came to a stop, you hastily tossed all the remaining cash at the driver and rushed inside the hospital. Your must have looked frantic as you ran around, sobbing and calling out Jungkook's name. Thankfully, a compassionate nurse came to your aid and calmly checked the hospital charts for the name you managed to utter amidst your sobs.

"Come with me, dear. He's in the ER," you swiftly followed the nurse to a bustling room. As the nurse drew back the curtain, you braced yourself for the worst—expecting to see Jungkook badly injured, bleeding, or worse. However, what you did not anticipate was finding Jungkook sitting there, looking.... perfectly fine?

You stared at the man sitting there, feeling a mix of confusion and relief. He was laughing at something the blond girl standing beside him had said. It was unexpected, given the seriousness of the call you received earlier. You couldn't help but wonder if there had been a mistake or if he had recovered miraculously.

"Baby, you came." His eyes lit up as soon as he saw you, there was not even a single scratch on Jeon Jungkook, maybe beside the scratched leather jacket. Now not to get you wrong, you were very happy that he was okay. You were just very confused. What was happening? You had stopped sobbing breathlessly but the tears were still flowing.

"I don't understand... Somebody called, they said... That something happened and it was serious." You tried explaining.

"I did get into a crash but it was nothing. They thought it was internal bleeding but that wasn't the case either. That's why I was here all afternoon, doing tests an all. But now I'm fine."

"Then why did they say that?"

"It was just a prank. I'm sorry it was Sua's Idea." He said pointing at the blond girl standing there. Your blood was boiling so fucking much that you didn't even care asking who this bitch even was let alone what she was doing with your boyfriend.

"A prank? You think this is funny?" Jungkook finally grasped the seriousness of the situation when he saw the mortified look on your face, realizing the impact of the prank. Your makeup was ruined from all the crying, and you looked exhausted.

"Baby, calm down it was just a joke." His hands came forward but you slapped it away.

"Do not Fucking touch me." You glared at him. "Do you seriously think that was funny? I almost had a heart attack, Jungkook. Do you know how fucking scared I was?" Jungkook didn't like when your voice did that. He could handle you yelling, screaming, and even calling him names, but seeing you speak with that dead serious look on your face was something he couldn't bear. It made him feel like he wanted to disappear. Jungkook wanted to jump off a cliff.

"You know what? I can't believe I even thought about giving you another chance. We are seriously done this time." You didn't even look back as you walked away as Jungkook struggled to get that IV out of his hand and run after you.

"Baby, stop I'm sorry. It was Sua's Idea, I swear."

The thunderstorm had finally hit your city with full blast. It was raining cats and dogs. In the midst of it all, everyone ran to sought shelter. However, that didn't stop you from sprinting out of the hospital. The storm didn't concern you; what mattered most was that you couldn't even bare the thought of being near Jeon Jungkook at that moment.

As you dwelled on everything that had happened, your anger intensified. You felt a surge of anger directed at Jungkook, the thunderstorm, and that stupid blond woman who played the prank. But, the strongest force of anger was aimed at yourself, for even thinking that he can take anything seriously. Why did you even bother believing he could change? He was and will always be a man-child.

"Babe, it's really dangerous outside."

"THEN STOP FOLLOWING ME."

"I'm not leaving you alone," he insisted, stepping out into the heavy rain to follow you. As you walked, you had no clear destination or plan in mind. All you knew was that you were so angry with Jeon Jungkook that you couldn't bear to look at his face.

After just a few minutes of walking in the worst thunderstorm you've experienced in years, you came to the realization that this was a reckless idea. Your emotions had driven you to act impulsively, and now you saw the potential danger not only for yourself but for the idiot following you as well. While you knew Jungkook seemed to have little to no regard for his own life and safety, you cared about him.

Recognizing the need to be level-headed and responsible, you decided to find shelter, a place where both of you could wait out the thunderstorm safely. You understood that even in moments of anger, you needed to prioritize the safety of both of you. You began searching for a suitable place where you could find refuge from the harsh weather.

Ignoring the constant pleas from the man behind to listen to him, you led him to a nearby subway station. The station provided shelter from the heavy rain and the strong winds that accompanied the thunderstorm. Inside, the noise of the rain was muffled, creating a more peaceful atmosphere.

"Babe, I'm so sorry, please talk to me," seeing your silence he continued "I messed up, and I'm really sorry. I should have never gone along with that prank."

"Yes you shouldn't have." you snapped making him jump a little. Taking a deep breath to calm your anger and clear your thoughts, you finally addressed the question that had been gnawing at you. "Who was that woman anyway?"

"Just some girl, she was in the bed beside mine and we got to talking but I swear to god, I did not flirt with her once. When I told her about you she came up with the prank and I should not have gone along with it. I'm sorry."

"I just feel that you can't take anything seriously. It's like everything is a joke to you. How do I know that you'll take me seriously? That you'll take this relationship seriously?"

"No... I know I've been a little childish," watching you raise an eyebrow he corrected himself "A lot childish. But I swear, babe. This is the most serious thing in my life. I've made many mistakes in the past but I swear I'll start redeeming everything. I'll prove how serious I am about us. You are everything for me, baby. Everything. You're it for me. I want to spend my whole life with you, __." The way he said your name sent shivers down your body. The way he looked at your eyes eased your mind a little. "I want to have a future with you. I want to marry you, I want to have a home with you, I want to grow old with you, that's how serious I am. I love you more than anything in this entire world and I'll prove it to you." You only realised that you were crying when he wiped a year from your eyes.

"You mean it?"

"Every word."

"Fine then. Let's go." You held out your and he quickly grabbed it. When you dragged him out of the subway station you realised that the storm had stopped. The universe was on your side for once.

Jungkook did not utter another word the whole way that you led him to your house. The silence was thick when you closed the door behind you. He still didn't know what it meant for you both, your silence did not give him any answer and he was scared to ask.

"I swear to god, Jeon Jungkook" You finally began after the painful silence and his heart skipped a beat in anticipation. "If I see you entertaining another women ever again, I'm walking out of your life. And this time it would be for good. I will not come back no matter how much you beg me to." It took him a couple seconds to take in your words.

"Does that mean-"

"Yes. I'm giving you another chance. But you mess it up and I'm dumping your ass." The next thing you know Jungkook is showering your whole face in kisses and he finally let go of the tears. Crying happily as he held you close.

"Thank you, baby. Thank you so much. I will not disappoint you, I promise."

"I hope so too." The both of you stood in the middle of your living room, soaking into each other's warmth.

"Now let me fuck you right." He said, making you yelp as he picked you up all of a sudden and rushed toward your bedroom. Your kisses soon turned heated and desperate. Both of you panting as he started taking off your wet clothes.

You were wet in more ways than one. His kisses traveled down your face along with each piece of garment he removed from you. Lips not sparing a single inch of skin as he spent the whole night showing you how much he loves you.

The next morning your wakeup call was none other than Jungkook's tongue swiping away at your center. You woke up with a gasp when the sun was yet to come out. You glanced down to find the mop of raven hair between your thighs.

"Oh god, koo yes." You moaned out loud when his plump lips wrapped around your clit and started sucking. His hands pushing down on your hips, keeping them from arching up on the bed.

His tongue swiped up from your opening as your juices trickled down to your posterior hole. It was too early for your head to comprehend whatever was happening. Your finger started tugging on his curls when he pulled you close to your orgasm. Agressively lapping at your pussy. The pleasure you felt was tremendous. Too much to handle.

Jungkook ate you out like he had rent to pay and this was his job. His tongue playing with you as you came down from your high screaming his name louder than ever. After pulling two more orgasms from you in the next 15 minutes Jungkook was finally satisfied and he kissed up his way to your lips.

"Jungkook, we had sex like, 7 times last night. It wasn't enough?" You giggled when you felt his hard boner pressing against your ass.

"It's never enough with you. Seven times is nothing, baby," he said as he slowly entered you, pulling out a moan from your lips. "I wanna fuck you seven days a week." He added between his lazy thrusts. "Every hour." He lands a gentle kiss on your lips. "Every minute." Fingers intertwining with your own. "Every second."

********

#ugh i love it!!#this jk has my heart #tightly in his grips #and never let go.#god I LOVE THIS #m: jungkook #au: exes #g: fluff #g: angst #g: smut #g: crack #i mean its jk we're talking abt ofc it involves crack #l: one shot #ex!jungkook #t: exes to lovers #n: fav

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kasagia · 27 days ago

Text

I love you... I am sorry IV

Pairing: Aleksander Morozova/The Darkling x fem!witch! reader Summary: Aleksander spends more time with Alina, playing with your heart. Luckily, an old friend returns to your side. Will he help you get over your Sasha and finally put yourself first? Or maybe you'll find that you're not dodging a bullet, you're just losing the love of your life. Aleksander Morozova's Masterlist ~•♤♤♤•~Main Masterlist ~•♤♤♤•~ Part 3 ~•♤♤♤•~ Part 5 ~•♤♤♤•~

"Any longer you stare at her like that and you'll burn holes in the back of her skull." Ulla comments as you sit in the tavern a bit apart from the rest of the group. And you look. At Aleksander and Alina's.

You shake your head and look away from them, digging into the beer in your hands. Ulla was right. You were pathetic, giving him exactly what he wanted – attention – when he was flirting with Alina just to spite you. Son of a bitch.

"I have no idea what you're on about." You mumble at her, the bitterness in your voice so obvious you grimace into your beer.

"About that donkey head, aka my stupid brother and his annoying Sunny Queen. I know you love that stubborn bastard, but the way you look at him and her, you're giving him exactly what he wants. Your jealousy. Just ignore him and go have fun with someone. Preferably a guy. That'll piss him off more."

You roll your eyes at her brilliant plan to get back at Aleksander. Sometimes you really wonder if you didn't make a mistake in raising her. She was such a teenage drama queen at times. Just like her brother.

"I doubt that adding another guy to this mess will help me in any way. Besides, he's right. We haven't been together for what… an age? I think it's time to move on."

"What?!" Ulla shouts at you, drawing the attention of the people around your table. And not only them.

You ignore the quick glance that Aleksander throws your way and try to speak as quietly as you can so he doesn't understand anything of your little conversation.

"What you just heard. I stayed where he left me for too long."

Ulla stares at you with wide eyes, blinking several times.

"But… but you can't… you love each other and… but…" You place your hand on hers and give her a sad smile.

"The thing is… sometimes love is not enough. You have to meet the other person halfway. Understand them, accept their flaws and be with them… we probably lacked that." You shrug and take a sip of your beer, trying your best to keep the tears from welling up in your eyes.

It would be better this way. After all, Luke and the other witches were after you. It'll only be a matter of time before they get you... or when you get them.

“Stupid boy.” Baghra comments as she sits down next to you. You raise an eyebrow at her unexpected company, noticing Ulla tense up next to you out of the corner of your eye. “I told you he wasn’t worth the effort.”

"Since when on earth are you interested in my personal life? Or anyone else's except yours?" You mock her as you sip your beer and try to ignore the way Aleksander delicately tugs at a strand of his Sol Koroleva's hair.

You feel like throwing up. And it's not from the amount of beer you've had. Maybe you need a little more to get drunk. This is probably the best way to spend tonight.

"When you make stupid decisions. Which means always." You roll your eyes at her and glance around the bar, trying to ignore the monologue she's giving you.

Keeping your gaze from wandering to the Darklina, as Ulla affectionately called it, is getting harder with each passing second.

You might want to gouge your eyes out.

But then, you notice the fire in the inn's fireplace flashing with different colours. Curious, you look closer until you see a hand in the fire. You frown, finishing the rest of your beer and watching as the hand waves at you, encouraging you to come over. You come up with some stupid excuse and get up from the table, heading towards the inn's exit.

The cold wind hits your skin, a clear reminder that you should have brought a coat with you. Especially when you're on the border with Fjerda in the dead of winter. You rub your arms together and mutter some kind of warming spell when suddenly, a thick coat is draped over you... a reindeer coat. With tiny crystals sewn into the leather.

You only knew one person who would voluntarily wear something like that.

"Mijomir?" You ask in shock and turn around to find yourself in the arms of your old friend.

"So obvious?" He asks with that trademark smirk of his. You jump into his arms with a squeal and wrap him in a tight hug.

"I've been looking for you for a decade, you idiot! Where have you been? We last saw each other at the port in Western Ravka."

"A little here, a little there. Kerch is a very interesting land. I'm sure you'd like it. For the record, I'm still mad at you for not coming with me, but I understand. Your boyfriend and all. But… I heard Luke's after you."

"Yeah… minor inconvenience."

"Luke or your man?"

"Both." You answer quickly, not wanting to delve into the subject. “Actually… I don’t have a man. He... he is not my man.” You mumble it more to yourself than to him.

The words are like a bitter goo on your tongue, a poison you must taste… or a terrible medicine that will heal you. Anyway... saying it out loud confirms what had been happening this week. Alina and Aleksander's closeness... your distance from each other. Maybe you were never meant to be together. Maybe you weren't the one he saw at the heart of creating the world. So why did it feel so right while it lasted?

Mijomir frowns at your confession but doesn't comment or question it. A true friend. One of the very few. If there was anyone you could trust with your life, other than Ulla and Aleks… other than Ulla, it was him. And only him.

"Anyway… I figured you could use some help. Either killing Luke or pretending you were dead. Although from what I gather, you managed to pull off the latter. You scared the living daylights out of me, by the way. I thought you were actually dead until I found that damn communication stone."

"Sorry, drastic measures and all that. Besides, I haven't heard from you in 10 years."

"I was busy. I thought I was…" He sighs and runs a hand through his hair. "We don't have much luck with significant others, do we?"

"Hell no. But I'm guessing most witches don't." You nod, agreeing with him on that one point.

You open your mouth to ask him exactly what he was doing during that time, but just then fate decides to put another witch in your path. This time, a worse one.

You don't even know the redhead who attacks you. She simply throws ropes at you and uses her magic to bind you with them. But before she can leap at you with a golden dagger, Mijomir is there to save the day and push her away from you. Clumsily enough that the woman cuts your right cheek.

You hiss as you feel blood drip down your skin but quickly recover. You shrug off your heavy cloak and use an old trick taught to you by the older witches in your coven. The woman begins to choke on her own blood, which unfortunately has the same effect on you.

Blood pours from your eyeballs as you work your dark magic, tearing apart every cell in her, causing her heart to stop as you strip away every tiny tissue of her muscle and nerves to her heart.

Meanwhile, Mijomir kills another witch who came to the aid of the first one. You catch your breath in quick gasps, exhausted from using so much power. Mijomir quickly shoves the bodies into a ditch and sets them on fire, controlling the flame so it's not big enough to attract anyone's attention.

“Are you okay?” He asks, grabbing your arm and pulling you away from the fire. You nod, looking around the alley. "Don't worry; these are less-travelled areas. Although I think you know that when you stop here. What are you even doing here? You should be far away from here, either planning to assassinate Luke or to escape and start a new identity and life."

"I… I'm not exactly alone." You mumble, staring at the small fire.

5th attack this week. And it was only Wednesday. I think you're going for a record this week. And I guess the news of your death wasn't convincing enough in the witch world.

"What do you mean?"

"Y/N!" You shiver at the sound of Aleksander's voice behind you. You turn to see him, Baghra, Ulla, and Ivan heading your way. You sigh, realising that you're in for another long evening of explaining what happened.

You frown as Mijomir suddenly slumps on his knees to the ground, shivering in pain as he puts his hand on his heart. Luckily, you connect the dots quickly.

"No! Leave him alone, Ivan! He's a friend!" You shout at him and kneel next to the wizard.

Ivan thankfully listens to you for once, you doubt it was out of respect for you. More like your furious look or Aleksander's nod as he dismisses his shadows.

Anyway, when Mijomir can finally stand properly on two legs and is not in danger of being attacked by your little company, he is recognised.

"It can't be…" Ulla mutters, taking a step towards you and looking at him.

"Ulen'ka?" Your friend mumbles, squinting at her as if trying to connect the face of the child he knew with the face of the adult woman now standing before him.

"Uncle Mijo!" She screams and rushes to hug him. He can barely stand on his two legs.

Luckily, you support him, keeping your hand on his back and making sure Ulla doesn't jump on him and throw the two of them into the ditch where the witches' bodies were still burning.

"Uncle? I don't exactly remember you being part of the family." Aleksander speaks up, drawing your gaze.

You ignore the way your heart beats a little too fast, pleading with the saints who still listen to your pleas for Ivan not to sense this, and you give him a distant, cold look.

"He's my family, so don't be surprised that he's the same for Ulla."

"I thought you had no family." He notices, jabbing you in the sweet spot with a pin, using the knowledge of your past to hurt you intentionally. Son of a bitch. A real one.

"Well, I have Ulla and him. I guess that counts."

You mask your winning smirk, turning your head towards Ulla and Mijomir at the perfect moment, ensuring you do not notice the spark of pain in Aleksander's dark eyes as you exclude him from your 'family'. Serves him right. Although you doubt you would think so if you saw the true effect it had on him.

No… you end up putting him first.

"Let's go inside. Fedyor will patch you up." Aleksander says, nodding at your bloody cheek and the streaks of blood under your eyes.

"Ah, that. Don't move, Y/N." Mijomir says and walks over to you. He cups both of your cheeks in his hands and presses his lips to your forehead. You feel the magic swirl between you as he helps you heal without the little science of Grisha, just his magical essence.

After a while you feel much better; your head isn't spinning as much as before, and you feel more energetic after Mijomir lent you some of his magic so you could replenish your supplies.

He doesn't give you a chance to check Aleksander's expression. He grabs your hand and simply drags you into the inn, mumbling something about the bloody winter and how he won't be rubbing you with healing oils if you catch a cold.

Ulla will later describe to you in full detail how furious her brother was watching this interaction between you two.

You feel that Mijomir will help you with this exactly as a true friend would... or maybe even someone more.

"I don't want to leave you alone with her…" Aleksander grumbles, feeling guilty as he packs to leave.

You sigh, walking over to him. You take out the black linen shirt he wanted to take and leave it on your small bed. You hug him tightly, burying your face in the crook of his neck and inhaling his scent, tracing gentle, soothing circles on his back.

"I know, honey… But you said yourself that this is a good opportunity for us. Quick earnings, low risk of being discovered. And we need this money. Ulla is growing faster and faster; Baghra hasn't shown up in years… And you know perfectly well that my little witcher tricks and money creation are quite limited for now. You have to go."

He mumbles something into your hair and plants a long, tender kiss on the top of your head.

"Are you sure you'll be okay? And that you'll be safe without me?"

"Aleksander, it's only two weeks." You notice, pulling away to get a better look at him before he will leave.

Damn, you were lucky. He was all yours. Only yours.

"A lot may happen in those two weeks... just promise me you will wait here for me." You snort in amusement, as if you were going to move anywhere else until he comes back for the two of you.

His serious expression, however, suggests he's not in the same playful mood as you. You smile and cup his slightly bearded cheek in your hand.

"I will. I'm not going anywhere until you come back here again. Consider this a vacation from me and Ulla." You add playfully and press a kiss to the corner of his mouth.

You gasp in surprise when he grabs you by the waist, pressing you against the wooden wall of your little cabin in the woods and stealing a breath-taking kiss.

One of his hands wraps gently around your neck, the other cupping your cheek, lifting your head higher as his tongue makes its way into your mouth.

He devours you.

He takes everything you have from you, and all you can do is moan into his mouth, tightening your grip on him, pulling him closer to you desperately, melting into the feeling of having him so close to you, almost as close as he should ever be.

Your lips chase after his as he pulls away, but he doesn't let you kiss him again. Instead, he trails along the column of your neck, leaving soft bites and kisses, marking you for his absence, as if he hadn't done enough the night before, as if you weren't still sore from a long evening and morning of goodbyes.

As if you would ever let anyone have you the way he had you.

"I could spend all eternity with you and still not have enough of you." He mumbles against your skin, pressing one last kiss to your jaw and resting his forehead against yours, inhaling your scent, revelling in his final moments of closeness with you.

"Silver tongue…"

"As always. Just look at another man in my absence and you'll see what else I'm capable of."

"And jealous… you look damn handsome when you're jealous, Mr Morozova." You can't help but tease him, sending him a mischievous smirk as you ruffle his hair.

"Only about you, future Mrs Morozova."

"A bold statement from a man who didn't even give me a ring."

"Bold assumption that this man will let you go and have other options."

And maybe other women would have been scared of that, taken it as a big red flag, and packed their bags and run away long ago. But you loved that he was almost as madly in love with you as you were with him.

"Did he leave?" Mojomir asks, knocking on your door a few minutes after Aleksander leaves. You nod and open the door wider for him. "Woman, I feel like I'm in some kind of occupation. Or a secret cult. Or both. Are you sure you want this one? He keeps you locked away in the middle of the forest, away from the world, and makes you babysit his sister, as sweet as she is." He whispers, not wanting to wake Ulla from her afternoon nap.

"It's not like that… He loves me. And I love him. We just have each other, and that's it. Besides, I doubt the world would welcome a witch like me and a Grisha like him so willingly. I'm happy here."

You defend Aleksander, unpacking all the supplies Mijomir brought you from his last expedition. A few herbs that can't be obtained anywhere in Ravka, crystals, a new cauldron for your collection, and two new potion books.

"Does he even know what you're going to do? How much are you willing to sacrifice for him?" He asks you, taking one of the chairs. You sigh, putting the new things back in their places with your other witchy things.

"It's my choice. He has nothing to do with it. Anyway, if I told him, he'd try to stop me."

"That's what I was hoping for. This is crazy, Y/N. No one has ever attempted to create something this strong. Maybe only Ilya Morozova himself."

You smile to yourself at the irony of it. He was right. No one but Aleksander's grandfather would have dared to do something so crazy. You regret that he is dead, that you can't meet him, and talk about what you are going to do out of love for his grandson and granddaughter.

But it didn't discourage you. Or scare you. After all, you were supposed to be Morozova. You were supposed to create great things yourself.

"Only lunatics are worth something."

"I'll carve that on your tombstone. And mine, when that boyfriend of yours finds out I had a hand in this and helped you get killed."

"I think he'd sooner kill you just to come here and talk to me. You don't have to do anything more."

"Poor consolation. But seriously, watch out for him."

"He's a good man… despite what others may think."

Mijomir mumbles something under his breath about a psychopath with a heart of gold who kills innocent friends, but you don't have a chance to comment on it. Ulla, awake, runs to her step-uncle, peppering him with questions about his travels and adventures from the doorstep. You prepare dinner, listening to everything Mijomir exposed himself to, making little remarks about his safety from time to time.

You felt a little bit downhearted without Aleksander... but at least you had other family members to take care of.

After a long day of explaining to everyone the reason for Mijomir's presence, you almost thank the saints that you can finally rest.

You lie in the tavern's dingy bed, tossing and turning. Your restless mind effectively prevents you from falling asleep in these already questionable conditions. You sigh and get out of bed. You put on your coat and step out onto the small balcony that was somehow held up by the tavern's rotten wooden planks.

Your thoughts, of course, are none other than Alexander. As they always have been for centuries. You sigh and close your eyes, remembering the way he's looked at Alina these past few weeks. And even though you should have been over it, even though you should have walked away with dignity ages ago, let go of this losing battle with his pride; you just... couldn't.

He was the love of your life. He had told you a thousand times that you were the love of his life. And yet now, after so many centuries, after so much gossiping, after so many years together, after so many plans for a future together, so many promises that felt almost sacred... it felt more like a loss of your life.

It hurt all the more knowing that you would love him no matter what he did. Even if it was to hurt you. Sick, really. How could anyone love someone to such an extent? You suspected it was because of your immortality. Maybe if you had fewer years to waste sighing over him, it would be easier to forget him.

"Can't sleep?" You shiver as his voice booms from behind you. He pursues you like a plague, yet he won't even touch you with a three-foot pole. Ridiculous.

"I don't need sleep." You mumble without turning to face him, still leaning against the wooden railings. You wonder how much longer they can hold your weight before they break.

"Probably." He snorts mockingly and walks over to you. He leans against the railing, wincing as he hears the crunch of wood. "This is going to collapse soon."

"Probably." You nod apathetically, looking at the streets in front of you, not giving him a second glance. “Maybe you should go inside.”

"Who was he to you?" He growls, either unable to stop himself or biting his tongue too late.

"Who? Mijomir?" You ask, giving him a quick glance. “A friend. He would come over sometimes to help me with my witch stuff. Ulla loved playing with him.”

"Only a friend?"

This innocent question asked in the most nonchalant way he could muster makes you lose your composure. You snort in disbelief, finally giving him your gaze, only to see hurt and anger in his irises. He was acting like a 5-year-old who had a toy taken away that he didn't play with anyway but decided to be dramatic about it.

"You've got the nerve of a donkey turd to ask me that. Besides, I don't have to answer you. We're not together." You snap at him, ready to go back to your room and leave the balcony you share with him, but clearly today he's made it a point to annoy the living hell out of you.

"True. We are not together. And yet you are irritated by the sight of Alina and me." You stop at the door, clenching your fist at his irritating, cocky tone. Little son of a bitch. Scum.

"What can I say? You're not my favourite people. I actually only tolerate Ulla. And Mijomir." You engage in a verbal spar with him, even though the rational part of you is screaming to get out of there. You turn around and fold your arms, taking a step towards him. "But I see that today the roulette of your multiple personalities has drawn the version of you that wants to cling to our past." He snorts mockingly at your mockery and takes a step toward you, undeterred by the fury with which your eyes burn into his face.

"I think you're upset for a completely different reason." He replies confidently, as if he had any right to point out how he makes you feel.

"What do you want?" You sigh, tired of this game between you.

You had a coven of witches coveting your head, a war with Fjerda, and all of that combined with your ex's moods made you slowly prepare to explode. Preferably at him.

"Tomorrow we have our first serious battle with Fjerda. Alina has gathered the men." He explains it to you as if you were not a participant in any conversations about strategy for this particular battle.

"I know. And?" You ask impatiently, raising an eyebrow at him. He sighs and shifts his gaze from you to the streetlights.

"Look after yourself." He mumbles through clenched teeth as if someone had forced him to utter that small request. For a moment you stand there, frozen in shock, before you burst out laughing, shaking your head in disbelief.

"I don't have to. I have Mijomir."

"Y/N..." He growls, grabbing your elbow the moment you turn to go back to your room. You close your eyes and swallow as he spins you around, holding both of your forearms in his tight grip. "I am serious."

"Me too. You should go to Alina." You reply, looking him straight in the eyes, trying to maintain that unfazed attitude.

But he knows you better than that. One look in your eyes, the slight tremor in your voice as you say her name, and he knows everything he needs.

"Jealous?" You snort mockingly at his question. His raised eyebrow and mischievous smirk quickly fall under your indifferent and nonchalant attitude.

"I have no right to."

"But you are, don't you?" You frown as he continues to push the subject.

Even if you were... what would it change? Absolutely nothing. He's burnt himself too many times to put his hand in the same fire a second time. And you... you were probably too bruised to fight for him anymore.

"What game are you playing right now? What do you want to prove?"

You stare at each other for a long moment as he ponders the answer he was supposed to give you. Because what exactly did he want from you? Why did he follow you here? Why did he go out on that damn balcony after you without a second thought? Why did he tell Ivan to keep an eye on you? He knew. But it would be too pathetic to admit it.

"You were with me just to create this necklace, weren't you?" He watches you closely, asking you this question, a question that has hung unspoken between you ever since he found out what exactly the glass heart on your chest was supposed to do.

He watches with stoic calm as your eyes widen in shock at his question as you hold your breath for a moment, processing exactly what he's just said to you. And the moment you pull away from him, when tears briefly fill your eyes, quickly giving way to anger and frustration, he knows that the answer wasn't going to be quite what his logical, rational side was expecting.

"No. I loved you. I loved you, Aleksander. I fucking loved you with all my stupid heart. From the moment I saw you, I knew I had to have you, and from the moment I really knew you, I knew I had lost my heart to some guy who was too mysterious to tell me his damn name. And I should have known better; I should have walked away at the first sign of trouble, but damn it, I LOVED YOU. That's why I created this necklace. To never leave you alone, to always be with you, to help you bear the eternity that awaited you. But you can't seem to get it into your thick skull, so what does it matter? Too many years have passed to continue digging into it. You won't trust me anymore, and I won't forgive you for choosing to believe I was against you from the very beginning of us for so long, so... so maybe we should finally let this go."

"Let this go? Do you really want to let this go? Just like that?"

"I am dead to you either way. Am I not, Aleksander?" You ask with your head held high, even though your voice cracks slightly at the end.

He's astonished. He instinctively moves closer, extending his hand in an attempt to grasp your arm. However, you deftly retreat, evading his touch before his fingertips can even touch your skin. The sight of your tears sends a pain through him as intense as the merzost itself has never caused.

"How can you expect... you were the love of my life..." He stutters through his words, too afraid to open up to both you and himself and too petrified to let you go forever.

"And you were the loss of mine, Sasha." You whisper, letting a few tears roll down your cheeks before you aggressively wipe them away with the sleeve of your shirt. The glass heart of your necklace clinks against the metal buttons.

This destroys him completely. He stands frozen in place, watching as you take off that damn immortality necklace and place it on the railing that looks like it's about to collapse in any second.

"Here… do with it what you want." You reply in resignation as he is frozen in pure panic, only able to hear the pounding of his own heart as it accelerates by several hundred miles a minute.

"Y/N..." He mumbles, reaching for you one last time, but can only manage to graze the fabric of your shirt with his fingertip as you run as fast as you can back to your room. "Y/N!" He calls after you as you slam the door shut, nearly ripping the already questionably constructed frame off its hinges.

He takes the necklace in a flash and clutches it securely in his hand, having a small heart attack as a silver pendant almost falls off the railing from the power of which you shut the door.

You wanted to get rid of that damn necklace and him… but all you did was prove to him what you had just said so loudly.

You didn't want immortality just for yourself.

You wanted it for him. So he wouldn't be alone.

And now that Alina was there and you thought he was with her…

No… you couldn't just do it… without it you'll die, if not of old age then from those who hunted you… and he couldn't… Ulla will kill him.

"Trouble in paradise?" His mother asks, leaning against the door frame and watching him carefully.

He takes one deep calming breath, shoving his shaking, empty hand into his pocket so as not to show her the unstable, trembling emotional mess he currently was.

"For centuries, thanks for noticing, mother." He growls back at her with clenched teeth, staring at the necklace in his hand. His blood. In this heart. He had thought for a long time that it was meant to symbolise your power over his heart. In fact, it was a symbol of his power over yours.

How funny it is that in the moments when he feels the most powerless, his mother is always there with him...

"Are you just going to let her go?"

The irony is that the same woman who pushed him away from you is now questioning your idea of leaving him. Even dares to talk him out of the mere idea of allowing it… or maybe that was his mother's way to make him completely disgusted with you. Although… in all these years, has he ever really had a resentment for you that outweighed his… his love for you?

"You wanted this. Weren't you the one who told me she created that necklace behind my back? Weren't you the one who rubbed it in my face with pleasure that I had let a witch who wanted to use my immortality for her own gain? That it was never about me, but about the power I have? Didn't you do the same with Alina?" He throws accusations at her furiously, as if a moment ago he did not have tears of helplessness and despair in his eyes.

"I was right about Alina. You wanted to use her, you can't convince me otherwise. The saints know that all you really loved was that witch girl and your sister."

Aleksander just shakes his head and heads inside his room, knowing that arguing with her is a lost cause. He sits on the bed, the necklace still in his tight grip as he wonders what the hell he's supposed to do now.

"You were right. I made a mistake with Y/N. But how was I supposed to know she did it for you?"

"And how was I supposed to trust her when you spent your whole life teaching me to rely only on myself, mother?" He asks mockingly, lifting his gaze to her, surprised that she had gone to the trouble of following him and continuing his tirade.

"Don't put the blame on me. The pride that prevents you from telling her you were wrong is something you earned entirely by yourself." She continues to mock him, to which he just rolls his eyes. Her demeanour changes though, becoming a tad… awkward as she avoids looking at him. "I… I may have been wrong in a few matters. But I know one thing for sure. Pride, Aleksander, does not go hand in hand with love."

"Another lesson?" He mumbles, raising an eyebrow at her.

She doesn't grace him with an answer, though. She leaves his room, leaving him alone with his thoughts, the shadows moving around him, and the necklace still safe in his hand.

And Aleksander is faced with one dark truth that he has been running away from for so many years, centuries even.

He had wasted so much time with you, believing the worst, clinging to his mother's suspicions of you, and then, when some sense returned to him, he had clung to his pride. Because admitting that he had ruined your lives… who had condemned your love to loss and failure would have been too devastating for him.

For a long time he had thought that the Sun Summoner would be his guide, his equal, would show him the way, would stay with him, and would fight for their people together. Would fight for him. Would give him light in his darkness. But the truth was, he already had his equal. You. And he had lost you.

No. He won't let you go.

He jumps out of his bed and walks out of his room, storming into yours. He almost breaks the door down with his strength, and if he weren't so desperate, he'd wonder why it's open, but all he can think about is getting you back.

Damn his pride. Without you, none of this mattered anyway; nothing worked out for him the way it should. And although he couldn't live with you, living without you seemed a much crueller, more torturous process than admitting that he needed you desperately, painfully, in a crazy way that took away his rational thought.

"I love you, Y/N. I'm sorry, I…" His confession dies on his tongue when he sees only an empty room. An empty room with a broken window and signs of a fight in it.

His apology catches in his throat, ash on his tongue as he realises exactly what happened while he was in the next room, oblivious, when he should have been in your bed with you, holding you safe in his arms, killing whoever came after you.

A cold chill runs through him, his shadows churning within him, ready to be released, to create another Fold, like when they first took you from him. Thankfully, he is much older and has much more self-control. He does not want to destroy any clues.

"IVAN!" He's yelling at the entire tavern, not caring who he wakes up. In fact, he wants to wake everyone up and immediately go on a search, chasing you. "IVAN!"

He places your necklace around his neck, his own heart racing with fear. You were defenceless. Mortal. Vulnerable to ordinary blades and bullets.

"Moi soverenyi, what..." Ivan’s question dies on his lips as he runs into the room, his kefta barely fastened. Heartrender swallows hard. “She’s gone.”

"Collect our people. We're coming for her. Spread the word. Everyone who believes in the Starless One must show up."

"What's going on?" Alina enters the room, tying her robe. He can see Nikolai and Ulla right behind her, but he's too preoccupied to answer her.

He walks deeper into the room, analysing every inch of the floor covered in blood and blade scratches. And then he finds. A small figurine of a wolf's head. A Drüskelle.

If they had her, word would spread quickly to the Sabbath who hunted her.

"You can't disappear and look for her now! We have more important things to do! We have a war to win!" Alina protests, tugging on the sleeve of his shirt, forcing him to stand up from the floor and look at her.

He's faster than she can process. He grabs her by the throat and pins her to the wall. Alina gasps, barely able to say a word, let alone take a proper breath. He casts his shadows, seeing Nikolai reach for his gun out of the corner of his eye. Saints praise Ivan; he'll quickly overpower the little Tsar.

"Sasha, stop!" Aleksander hears Ulla's weak protest, but all he can do is stare at Alina with pure hatred.

For a moment, he thinks of a similar situation between them in his grandfather's workshop. The difference is that then he did care a little about the Sun Summoner, but now he doesn't feel that sentiment anymore.

But after the diminutive form of his name uttered by Ulla seeps into his brain, all he can remember are your words.

You were the love of my life...

And you were the loss of mine, Sasha.

"If I don't find her, I'll make sure you have nothing to fight for. There'll be no Fjerda, no Ravka, no Shu, nothing. I'll leave nothing that my shadows won't turn into one big fold. Do you understand now how important she is, moya tsarista?" He growls, using his most intimidating tone. Shadows gather around him uncontrollably, his hand around Alina's neck shaking as he struggles to retain any remaining control.

You were the loss of mine, Sasha.

He watches with satisfaction as she just nods, barely able to do anything. He lets go of her, letting her fall to the floor, coughing, holding her neck as she gasps for air.

"You are mad... completely mad." Alina is panting on the floor, trying to pull herself together after his attack at her. But he doesn't see her. He only sees your tearful eyes.

You were the loss of my life, Sasha.

"Don't blame me, my Sol Koroleva. Love makes me crazy." He scoffs mockingly and turns to Ulla, who has been watching this with panic and slight disappointment. "Go get that wizard of hers. Maybe he'll be useful." Aleksander replies, unfazed by her gaze. He will be whatever monster he has to to get you back.

He was the Black General. A Darkling. He would kill anyone who dared to touch what was his.

His sister nods and runs out of the room, leaving him with a furious Alina, an unconscious Nikolai, and Ivan, who is the only one who seems unfazed by the whole situation. May the saints bless him.

"We'll find her." His heartrender assures him, at which he just nods.

He has to find you. He sees no other option.

The glass heart now hanging around his neck had evaporated a hole right through him. This is the last time he lets you take off that damn necklace.

Suddenly he doesn't care at all that it was created without his consent. What an irony…

All he thinks about is your last words to him.

Do with it what you want.

He will. He will put it right where it belongs. On your neck.

Or he'll kill everything around him trying to do so.

Did I have fun writing the end of the chapter? Yes. I'm curious what you think about Mijomir and what your attitudes are towards the next chapter. I'm also wondering how long this series will be, what else you want to see, etc., so if you have any special requests, feel free to write! (I love all my anonymous people, so do not be more shy than me! 😊😘)

Any comments/messages/hearts are greatly appreciated! Thank you so much!!! If you want to, let me know what you think 🥰🖤🖤

Taglist (As always, I hope that everyone who wants to be here is here): @aoi-targaryen @chelseyyouraverageluigi @watersquirtpewpewboomm @summersummoner-pat @barnes70stark @meadowshelby

@zeeader @the-desilittle-bird

@thepassionatereader @budugu

@sinistersnakey @diaries-of-a-hopelessromantic

@aryhyuuga

@oh-thats-cute

@meadows5

@dreamtheatre

@sinistersnakey

@lovelydoveval

@shatteredheartofdarkness

@m-ichelles-world

@ariesmai

@flostvs1508

@darkdaydreamer

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estrellami-1 · 11 months ago

Text

Steddie Week 2024 | Steddie Microfic

July 7th prompt: Free Space - Mystery, Hands, Long, Trade, Exes to Lovers or Getting Back Together, Drunken Confession (aka I combined all the prompts I didn’t use this week) | July prompt: one

Day 1 | Day 2 | Day 3 | Day 4 | Day 5 | Day 6

Word count: 1,111

No warnings apply

Rated T

@steddie-week | @steddiemicrofic

It was never a mystery, to Steve, how they got together. How they worked together.

The only mystery is how he managed to let him go—to lose him in a way Steve hadn’t understood until Eddie. Because Nancy was great, she was fantastic, Steve was in love. He doesn’t doubt that. But it never felt like it did with Eddie: low lights in the club, hands on each other’s bodies, open-mouth kisses that really was nothing more than them panting into each other’s mouths—

Stumbling into the bathroom, or into either of their bedrooms, hands in hair and under shirts and unbuckling belts—

Sleepy, slow morning kisses. Breakfast. Holidays.

How did it end?

Steve thinks, remembers fists clenched at sides, red faces, stiff shoulders.

Remembers shouted words, cold shoulders, slammed doors.

Remembers the key left on the kitchen counter.

That had done it, he remembers, he had called Robin, already sobbing, and she was on her bike and halfway there practically before she had hung up the phone. She’d held him as he fell apart on the kitchen tiles.

Then again, when he went to go to bed. Saw the two pillows. Threw one off; it hit the wall, slid down. Had to change the sheets; they smelled too much like him.

It took him a long time—a really long time—to get to the point he’d be okay on his own for more than a couple hours, to the point he could go out to clubs again. Not the same ones he’d gone to, never those, but… he moved on. Kind of.

He knew, and Robin knew, that part of him, at least, would always love Eddie.

It’s why when they’re in a club—a new one they had just found, okay music but better drinks and prospects—and Steve grabs her arm, she looks the direction he is.

He feels like he’s swallowing sandpaper. “His hair is longer.”

“It is.” She pries his fingers off, just so he’s not bruising her anymore, but holds his hand. “What do you want to do about it?”

“I don’t know,” he mutters, watches the way Eddie prowls through the crowd, smirking at people, but still definitely on his way to the bar.

The bar. “I’m gonna get us more drinks,” he says. They both ignore the fact that they’ve barely touched their current glasses.

“Let me know if you need backup.”

“Will do.” He looks at her, for the first time since seeing him, and smiles. “Love you, Robbie.”

She rolls her eyes, but smiles. “Love you, dingus. Go get your man back.”

Steve makes it to the bar before Eddie, asks for whatever is on tap. Looks away at the wall. Can’t watch him walk up.

“Long Island,” he hears directly beside him, and turns to see Eddie turning to see Steve.

He takes a breath. “Eddie.”

Eddie looks… he looks good, because he always does, but he looks tired, maybe a little thinner. Not… not good, not happy like he was. He swallows. “Steve.”

The bartender hands over their drinks, and Steve takes a sip only to cough. “Sorry, fuck,” he mutters, finally looking at the glass in his hand. He’s got the Long Island, and Eddie’s got his beer.

Eddie’s watching him with an interesting little smile. “Trade?”

“Trade,” Steve agrees, nodding. He coughs again. “God, how do you like that?”

Eddie snickers, pulls a lock of hair over his face. Steve wishes he wouldn’t.

Miraculously, they keep talking. They’re never searching for the next word to make the silence go away because there is no silence.

Eventually Robin comes up to him, pulls him into a hug. “Imma go home with that girl,” she murmurs, pointing behind her. A cute, preppy-looking blonde smiles nervously at Steve. He smiles at her, then back to Robin. “Of course. Call the house, give me the address.” He kisses her forehead. “Have fun.”

“Oh, I will,” she grins, then turns to look at Eddie, eyes narrowed.

Eddie gulps. She grins, scary as anything, and whispers something in his ear that has him paling. “Yuh-yep. Yeah. Got it. Thanks Robin.”

Steve grimaces when she walks away. “What did she say?”

Eddie looks at him for a long minute. “Something I’ve known for a while now,” he eventually murmurs.

It was inevitable, really, that they would end up back here, hands in hair and under shirts, stumbling into Steve’s apartment, panting into each other’s mouths, trying to undo buckles by memory because the worst thing in the world right now would be to stop kissing.

“God, Steve,” Eddie gasps, pulling him down the hall. “C’mon- c’mon, please, need you, need you-”

“Yeah,” Steve answers against his mouth, just as affected. He’s got his own pants halfway off, thinking about his shirt next, thinking about the lube in the drawer that hasn’t gotten as much action as it used to, and suddenly he aches for it. “Need you inside me,” he mutters, kissing down Eddie’s neck, stopping at a place behind his ear that he knows from experience makes Eddie’s knees weak.

“Fuck,” Eddie chokes out. “Yeah, yeah, c’mon, c’mon baby, lemme in you- lube’s in the drawer?”

Steve opens the drawer in answer, roots around until his fingers close on the bottle. Pushes it into Eddie’s hand, pushes him away so Steve can get naked.

Eddie’s eyes rake along his body. He drops his own pants just as fast, limbs flying as he strips out of his shirt too, clambering onto the bed beside Steve’s hip, eyes wide and fingers shaking as he lubes up.

It’s after, when everything’s cooling and drying and becoming itchy, that Eddie’s breath wobbles. “I shouldn’t,” he mutters into Steve’s shoulder. “Shouldn’t say anything. But hell if I don’t miss you like crazy.”

Steve closes his eyes, tries to keep the tears at bay. “You’re drunk.”

“I had less than one drink.”

The tears win. “We broke up for a reason,” he whispers. “Didn’t we?”

“I was scared,” Eddie says.

“And you’re not now?”

“Only of losing you.”

Steve sobs, can’t help it, but he feels Eddie’s hot tears on his neck, too, and that somehow makes it better.

It’s the next morning, after slow, sleepy kisses and breakfast, that Steve sighs. “I never stopped loving you. I don’t think I can.”

“I don’t think I can, either.”

Steve slowly turns to look at him. “So what does that make us?”

Eddie shakes his head. “I don’t know. All I know is it makes me yours.”

“Yours,” Steve parrots, daring to curl his fingers over Eddie’s, breath hitching when he holds on just as tight. “That sounds pretty damn good to me.”

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steddieunderdogfics · 11 months ago

Note

https://archiveofourown.org/works/54410164/chapters/137825320 for the enemies to lovers theme!

do you think i have forgotten (about you) by stupidwithsteddie

Rating: Teens and Up

9,811 words, 3/3 chapters

Archive Warning: No Warnings

Tags: Battle of the Bands, Musician Eddie Munson, Musician Steve Harrington, Enemies to Lovers, Exes to Lovers, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Gay Eddie Munson, Angst with a Happy Ending, bitchy steve harrington, Hurt Steve Harrington, Hurt Eddie Munson, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Upside Down (Stranger Things), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, make ups, Love Confessions, Misunderstandings

Summary:

“I hope you’re successful, Eddie. I genuinely hope that for you but I hope you know that the songs that your fans will love the most will always be the ones I wrote. I hope you’re haunted by me every single time you step onto a stage. Fuck you, Eddie.” He spat, watching as Eddie’s face contorted into anger but he stormed away before he could let him respond. Steve Harrington didn’t know much but he knew one thing — he hated Eddie Munson and he always would. -- or the battle of the bands au where steve and eddie have a complicated past and they're forced to confront it through the only way they know how - music

Thanks for the rec!

This rec is a part of Theme Weekend. The theme this weekend is Enemies to Lovers.

Know a fic that deserves extra love? Submit through our asks or the submission box!

#steddie #steddie fic recs #steve harrington #steve x eddie #eddie munson #stranger things #steddieunderdogfics #theme weekend #enemies to lovers #exes to lovers #angst with a happy ending #rated t #misunderstandings #modern au #no upside down au

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potaetopic · 1 year ago

Text

awh, this is incredible!! the pining, ughh. AND THE MOODBOARD THAT U MADE????

def suits the mood, ugh, I love it!!!

lover’s revenge | kim taehyung ROCKSTAR AU

summary | you dated Taehyung before he made it big, so it was easy to assume he’d forgotten all about you. but for the past two years you’ve been his muse even after your split. a forbidden love that never faded.

warnings | 13.4k words. rockstar!Taehyung x f!reader, BAND AU, smut, angst, bad parenting [your dad hates tae], age gap [18/21, later on 22/25], family problems, break ups, heart ache, mentions of tobacco, smuuut. cock worshipping, cunnilingus, face sitting, oral [m and f], safe sex, soft sex, floor sex, dirty talk but soft,

visuals: Tae’s band plays music like the neighbourhood and cigarettes after sex type shit

2020

He slumped back, hair falling over his face staring at the garage light above him. He was trying his best to listen to his bandmates. They were going on and on about new music, something that'd help them get a deal. He couldn’t be with you anymore, so there was no reason for him to stick around and stall his future. Getting signed was the only way they could see themselves achieving their dreams. He was feeling conflicted though, between wanting to help his bandmates and his feelings.

In reality though he was just scared to bring back old feelings. They weren't even that old, six months that's all he's had to come back to his old self. It was his way of coping actually, repressing his emotions until they no longer bothered him. The first week was the hardest, he couldn't get out of bed or even shower. He couldn't eat and all he wanted to do was sleep, forget everything that had happened. But then anytime he'd go to sleep, his body would ache missing the feeling of someone else in his arms.

The second week it got a littler better. He was responding to his friend's messages again, being more focused on practice, and eating at least one full meal a day. He still aches for your touch but he was able to hide it better behind packs of cigarettes and alcohol late at night. His friends stopped asking him how he was doing and he stopped showing how affected he still was.

As time went on he got better at hiding it. There wouldn’t be any awkward silence when it was his turn to speak, or people walking on egg shells around him. Every now and then when he'd be laughing over something and suddenly he'd struggle to hide his sudden change in emotions. He'd think about your laugh, when you’d laugh so hard that you wouldn't be able to breathe anymore. You would hold your nose, trying to silence yourself from making the screeching noise that came out when you laughed. Or how you’d get cute lines on the side of your eyes. Then he'd think about what made you laugh, and how usually it was because of something you said or did.

So when they asked him to try and write again he was originally distraught. How was he supposed to write songs like how he used to? Writing about love and adolescence but now he couldn't write about that. How was he supposed to write about being in love or feeling happy when he felt the complete opposite.

Anytime he thought about writing he thought about you. How you left him or no, he left you? He could never really understand which but it didn’t matter. He missed your kisses and touches on his skin. The warmth you brought when he'd hold you in his arms late at night after sneaking into your room. Your pretty smile and photogenic features always picture perfect on his cameras. Or their arguments where tears would be running down your face and his voice would become too hoarse because of the constant yelling back and forth.

But he tried writing again, and he couldn't help that all he could write about was you, he just didn't know how much it'd change his life.

It was easier for you, at least during the day. You’d spend all your time studying, paying attention in class, going out with classmates, anything really. If it could distract you long enough to not go through your old pictures, you did it. Your friends didn't ask how you were doing anymore, you were obvious with how you felt. You were better, or at least they thought you were l. Behind your smile you’d find yourself unable to hold back from thinking about him.

How he'd sneak into your room through your window late at night after you would get into a fight, and he'd have the biggest pout on his face trying to butter you up into letting him stay the night after your parents went to sleep, they never liked him. You’d think about how he'd lay on top of you, head rested on your chest as you played with his hair listening to him hum a new sound asking if it was good enough for a song on his mind.

Or when he'd have you sit between his parted legs, arms wrapped around yours, hands holding as he helped you try and find the G on the guitar. He'd kiss your hair when you’d cheer for finally playing something audible even if it was just two simple notes that'd have you giddy between his legs and arms.

It's been six months already, you should be at least a little moved on by now. You’ve started University like your parents wanted. You’ve made new friends, you should be moving on now. You weren’t. He was your first real love. You still thought about him late at night alone in your bedroom. How he used to sneak in and bring snacks so you could eat them on the roof of parent’s house watching the moon and talking about your future together. You were twenty and in love. Had been for two years already. Since you were eighteen, that’s when you met him. He was the cool musician guy working at the record store. He was a couple years older, just 21, but your parents hated him for dropping out of school. It didn’t make you love him any less.

You were trying to get over him though, you’d look whenever your friends would tell you there was a cute guy interested in you, you’d message and hang out in group settings but emotionally you weren’t ready at all. Not when someone would give you a smile and all you could see was Taehyung’s cute little boxy smile. How he'd grin so wide whenever you’d cheer at every band practice.

But it was only six months ago, and you were together two years during your most vulnerable years.

2021

You’d been in the middle of a drive to your friend's house. At first you couldn't recognize the sound, something completely new, but the soft melodic voice began singing. It felt like everything was spinning, it took everything in you not to go down on your brakes and stop the car instantly. The rain thudded against your window, you slowly drove off the main road, parked to the side of the street trying to get a better listen. You could be right, right ?

Turning the music up, you listen carefully to the song playing on the radio.

Kim Taehyung was playing in the radio. He’d made it.

It had been an entire year already, struggling to even think about anything but him for months, like a broken record constantly putting the thought of him in your brain. And on a day where he hadn't crossed your mind yet did the music play. You could spot his voice even if he was muffled by thousands in a heartbeat.

It was too engraved into your brain to forget. How could you forget the gentle voice that used to sing to you on a late night? You’d be in his arms hearing him him lightly feeling the vibrations of his chest as you rested your cheek on it.

The late afternoons by the bridge where the two would sit, bags spread out along with pens and notebooks content with watching you study. His straight posture as he asked you to listen to yet another idea he had, lyrics flowing out in a soft melody each time. You don’t think you could ever forget what his voice sounded like, especially not playing in high volume in the small car of yours.

It was the only thing keeping him from returning to his old ways. He'd spent so much time trying to distract himself with anything possible just so he wouldn't think of you. He'd write about things like your warmth and your future or the past, but it'd always come around about you. About your smile and how it'd make his chest ache each time he was the cause of it. Or the smell of your lavender shampoo stuck in his nose all day after holding you in his arms all night.

And he sang about love, or heartbreak actually. The thought of never finding anyone like you again, and he missed you and wished to hold you in his arms. How it wasn’t your fault you didn’t work out, he didn’t blame you for leaving him. But another second would pass and he'd sing about how he hated you. How he never wanted to see you again and he hoped you weren’t doing well but only because he was angry. Sometimes that he was sorry, that he wished he could be the person your parents had wanted for you. And his songs would become angrier as time went by. They wouldn't be as soft as the one you’d heard in the car.

They wouldn't be about missing you and always loving you but instead about how you hurt him too. How you let your parent’s decide the fate of your relationship. How you didn’t fight hard enough. How you left him behind too. Songs about wanting to break girl’s hearts and get back at them. So the band's image did a huge 180 degrees from the soft love struck image they had to this darker version of rock, smoking, and sex.

The image of what your mother warned you about, turning him into what your parents hated. Almost like it was his own way to express his pain and his change, he wasn't the same boy he once was. Hell always remember what they told him, “You think you’re good enough for our daughter? A dead beat musician who can barely even take care of himself? Y/n is better than you, she always will be and you’re a sorry excuse for a man.” He remembered wanting to tell them off. You were twenty, you could make your own decisions. They acted like it was wrong for them to be together.

Your phone rang, you struggled to find the want to get back on the road and leave to your friend’s house. Digging around the console you found it, pushing it to your ear and lowering the volume of his singing voice to answer.

"Hello?" You said through the phone, holding it between your cheek and shoulder as you turned your signal light on and motioned to try and swerve into the lane.

"How are you?" You stopped, car honking behind you as you pulled back into your lane. The voice from the radio speaking softly through the end of your phone. "Y/n?"

Without thinking, you hung up, chucking the phone onto the empty passenger's side, biting your lip nervously as you finally got back on the road. There was nothing to come out from receiving a call from him. You couldn't even find it in you to answer. As much as you wanted to talk to him you knew you wouldn't be able to control yourself. You’d want to crawl back into his arms like before and forget everything that has happened since then.

But he was still confused, holding the phone in his hand looking down at the blank screen with a tight jaw. His fingers tightened around the device, inhaling slowly as his tongue poked against the inside of his cheek. He threw the phone on the bench, standing up and hiding his face in his hands.

He was an idiot to think you’d care about their debut. To think that maybe if he snuck off from practice to smoke a cigarette and call you, you’d actually stick around and hear him out. At least he knew he wasn't blocked, but he couldn't tell if that was for better or worse. You answered, you knew who he was, if you didn't you wouldn't have hung up on him so quickly.

2022

It was almost taunting you, his image staring back at you like you were still the only two people in the world. That wasn't the case though, and you’ve no reason to really be upset but you were. He was off living his dream, doing what he's always done and you felt bitter about it. The image of him smiling widely with his arm around his bandmates like he was the happiest kid in the world. The woman on his side fitting the image of the group perfectly. You wanted to blame him for leaving you behind but you couldn’t. He didn’t leave you behind, you left each other. No one was more at fault than the other but fuck did it hurt.

You didn’t care about his fame other than that you were happy for him. It’s what he’d always wanted and you’d gotten in the way of it for too long. That’s why when he called you after their debut you didn’t say anything. He had to live his life and you had to go live yours.

“You have to!” He whined dragging you along behind him, “The place just opened and we’re lucky to even get in tonight. Namjoon got us early admission since BTS is performing!”

You looked to Jimin, a pout on his face as he yanked you along. He couldn’t understand what the big deal was. You were his close friend and you couldn’t even spend his own birthday with him? Like come on, he can’t even understand what was the problem all of a sudden. How was he supposed to know that you did not want to see the band BTS perform? They were his favorite band! He didn’t know you had pictures of you with the lead singer from years before? His arm thrown around you, lips pressed against your cheek, large smile on your face.

“Fine, we’re here anyway,” you let him drag you to where your other friends stood waiting for you, “I’ve never met a birthday boy who plans his own birthday. Come on!”

A smile spread across your face as you went to your friends. It’s fine. By the looks of the line, the new club will be packed especially with the band performing tonight. Apparently close friends with the club owner, Kim Seokjin. “It’s my fucking birthday!” Was the first thing Jimin shouted when you all made it in.

You kept to his side, hiding a little. You couldn’t risk being seen even if the chances were slim. He probably wouldn’t even recognize you. Your hair was different, your style was different. You weren’t the same person he was with. Plus, he was a big time celeb now, he probably had more things to do than worry about his ex girlfriend he dated when he was younger. Maybe you were just being super conceited thinking he’d still think about you every now and then. Or hopeful, maybe.

“Let’s go get him a drink,” Namjoon told you and you nodded. You looked to your friends who surrounded Jimin taking orders before you left. Namjoon was a close friend of yours, they bother we’re actually. Jimin and Namjoon were both your seniors in college until they graduated. Jimin had a shared requisite course with you and that’s how you met. Namjoon was part of a tutoring program and he became your friend through that. The other such as Jieun, Heein, and Yuna you roomed with them in college before you moved out. You don’t talk to anyone from before going to the University and maybe it was for the better.

“I’ve still never met anyone who would rather plan every little detail of their birthday than let someone else,” you laughed lightly as you waited at the bar. You were thankful for Namjoon at the moment, he always had a way of sending something was wrong even if you didn’t tell him what. His presence was calming enough. He just laughed finally catching the bartender’s attention, “He’s a perfectionist when it comes to celebrating himself.”

“Four shots of…” you weren’t paying attention fully. Namjoon was smiling warmly at you that you didn’t notice what was going on around you. When the bartender spoke again, “Need a little boost for the stage tonight?”

You froze at his words. The stage? Not wanting to turn, you let your eyes wander off to the person standing next to you, scared to see who might be standing next to you. It was a guy with black hair, tattoos and piercings. He must’ve caught you looking because he sent you a wink. You didn’t react, eyes flickering behind him to the stage where stagehands were getting equipment ready. The stranger’s brows furrowed as he glance over to you again. Did he know you from somewhere? He didn’t bother hiding the fact that he was looking, letting his eyes trail over your features longer than necessary. When they set a tray of the shots in front of him, the bartender telling him they were on the house, he turned to you.

“Hey, have we ever met before?” He asked suddenly looking over to you. You looked back to him, Namjoon preoccupied with paying to notice and your brows only scrunched together in confusion. Was this some rockstar pick-up line? “No?”

He forced a smile on his face, “Right sorry.” And he left. He did know you from somewhere, or he’d at least seen you before. He walked back to his bandmates, shots for them all, “I’ve got the drinks!”

“Took you long enough,” Hoseok was the first to say something smiling at him as he set his drumsticks down. Jungkook paid him no mind as he stared ahead at the lead singer, “Tae, mind if I borrow cash for a tip? I don’t got any.”

Taehyung shrugged, motioning over his shoulder where his wallet was in his bag. Jungkook handed the tray to Hoseok as he went over to their pile of things. He dug through Taehyung’s bag until he found his wallet. Inside it was the usual stuff, he kept rummaging though. Hidden between some punch cards he found it. A small, wallet sized picture.

A picture of a woman. A woman with a lazy smile and half glazed over eyes. She was in a messy bed cuddled into bed sheets with a small puppy in her hands. It was then that Jungkook noticed that it was you. The one he’d just seen at the bar is the same person Taehyung kept hidden in his wallet. The only reason why Jungkook even knew of this photo is because of the time he meant to steal a couple bucks from his hyung, dropped the wallet and the picture slipped out. He wasn’t sure what to do, should he tell Taehyung who he just saw?

But then he remembered the time he asked his hyung about the mystery girl, Taehyung had gotten mad and stormed off. As if summoning him too, a hand snatched the picture and wallet out of his hands, “What the fuck are you doing?”

Jungkook looked up at him, “I—Tae—“ he took a deep breath, “Who is that again?”

“None of your business,” his voice was sharp, mean almost and he shook the thought, “Nobody, it doesn’t matter.”

“Hyung, I think I…” should he tell him? He shook his head, he shouldn’t. But he had to. He didn’t know that much about Taehyung. He barely joined the band a year ago but his band mate was always quiet and on his own. He never seemed into anything and always out of it. Did this person have a say in it? Is that why Taehyung still carried this picture around despite how sensitive the topic was. No, he had to say something. He’d feel guilty if he knew and never spoke up about it. For better or worse, Jungkook just saw the person Taehyung keeps hidden in his wallet.

“That person in the picture,” Jungkook swallowed the lump in his throat.

“Alright guys!” Sungha, their manager cut in, “On stage, come on. Okay, Taehyungie?” Taehyung didn’t listen to her, Jungkook had to say something about you and he needed to know now if it was gonna piss him off or not.

“She’s here, I-I just saw her—“

“Alright let’s go!” Yoongi smiled widely, high off the thought of performing but Taehyung didn’t react.

He couldn’t stop his voice from cracking as he pointed to your picture, “H-Her?” Jungkook nodded, “At the bar.”

You were here? You came? You actually came to one of their shows? He knew this was a smaller performance, just fitting this little favor into their schedule for Jin since it was his opening night. He spent so many shows in Seoul searching for someone in the crowd who wasn’t there and now you were. Did you know he was here? Did you come alone? No, definitely not. Who goes alone on a Saturday night to a opening night for a club? Did you come with friends? A boyfriend? Probably. Why would you be single anyway? Not like you’ve been waiting for him.

“Come on,” Jungkook tried pulling Taehyung but he shook him off. Taehyung shook his head, “You’re telling me… her? You saw her? Here? Tonight? Where, tell me where is she?”

“Tae come on man!” Hobi put his hands on his shoulders leading him onto stage away from Jungkook. Jungkook just followed, maybe after the performance Taehyung could explain what’s going on.

“Holy shit they’re about to perform!” Jimin shook you, arms around your waist trying to lift you up in his excitement, “Fuck, someone get me a shot!”

“Here, here,” Jieun laughed as she handed him more alcohol. You rolled your eyes laughing as your best friend got shitfaced for his birthday. You refused to look to the stage but you could hear the cheers all around you.

It wasn’t until his voice spoke up, the same deep, calming voice speak through the mix. The same voice that used to sing to you in the back of some shitty truck parked by traintracks. The same voice that’d whisper in your ear, I love you.

You couldn’t. You couldn’t do it.

Taehyung’s eyes had been racing over all the faces in the poorly lit club. He was going to find you, no matter what.

The music began, he could hear Hoseok behind him counting down to start but he was frozen in place. He was going to find you. You weren’t in the front, or the right, or the left. He could barely see the back but he knew you had to be here. He just needed to see how you were doing. And like a miracle happened, one of the set lights ran through the crowd, that’s how he saw you and you saw him. Your eyes met for the briefest of moments before you were moving. No, leaving.

“I’ll be back,” he couldn’t stop himself from getting off the stage. Ignoring his manager and bandmate’s he was leaving, going after you. He tossed the mic to Jungkook and as if his band mate understood he was taking over. Sungha reached for Taehyung as he made it backstage but he moved again. He was going after you so he had to hurry.

Shit, he saw you. God was this so fucking weird. What if he thought you were stalking him. What if he thought you were bitter or not over him? You apologized to your friends telling them you just needed a breather. You walked to the back down the long hall where the bathrooms would be. You didn’t know that it connected to backstage until he was intercepting you. The light above you flickering, too dark in the tiny hallway.

Neither of you said anything, all you could both do was take in the other person’s features. He looked differently, obviously older than the last time you saw him when he was 24. His face was more structured, sharper and masculine. His eyes were still hooded over, lazy almost unamused but you knew that wasn’t the case.

“Y/n,” it came out just above a whisper. He looked over you. Your hair was different, your face a little more soft. Your glossy lips slightly parted, your dress fitting your curves perfectly. Still so damn beautiful.

You took a step closer, you had to. You hadn’t seen him in two years. It’s crazy how affected he made you. He looked great. When you took a step forward he did too until you were standing directly in front of each other. He wasn’t thinking when he did it, just took you in his arms, pressing you against him enjoying the feel of your arms wrapping around him. He took a deep breath of your hair, same lavender scent. He wanted you closer, no, needed you closer.

“Taehyung, Tae—hey,” you cupped his face in your hands forcing a friendly smile on your face, “You look amazing. You guys are amazing, wow.”

“Then why are you trying to run away? I’m sorry, I just had to see if it’s you.” Taehyung shook his head, “I know you don’t want to see me but I just needed to see how you were doing. I’m sorry, I’m sorry for—“

“Taehyungie! There you are!” Sungha came over quickly, arm slinging around him as she smiled widely, “I was wondering what happened.” She looked over to you; eyeing you up and down with distaste. Another groupie, she assumed. You looked down at the way she clung to him, the same girl in the pictures. Right, of course he’d moved on. Silly enough to think he wasn’t over you yet, but you could say now that you still missed him. He still mattered to you, you couldn’t escape him. The band plastered on billboards, bus stops, commercials.

You took a step back and immediately Taehyung grew anxious. No, you weren’t done yet. He pushed Sungha’s hand off, “Wait, do you still have the same number?”

You looked up at him as did his manager. Shaking your head no he sighed, “Y/n… please.”

“Tae everyone’s waiting for you,” Sungha caught in. Look, she didn’t care who you were. Taehyung had a show to do and she wasn’t going to let some groupie ruin their image. “I’ll call you,” you told him looking down at the floor.

“Here’s my new number,” he took your phone as you handed it to him. He put his number in and called himself. He wasn’t going to risk giving you his number only for you to never call him. He needed to be able to reach you two. You said a single goodbye and turned away.

He stood still, staring after you as you walked down the dim hallway. No, he couldn’t let you go yet. Not yet. He let himself slip away from Sungha again as he followed after you, “Y/n wait.”

You stopped, your hands were shaking a little so you hid them behind your back as you turned to him again. He stood in front of you, “Come backstage, please?”

“I can’t,” you answered quickly, “I’m here with some friends and we’re celebrating a birthday. He’d kill me if I ditched on him.”

“They can come too,” Taehyung pointed out, “Sungha, make sure security lets them through, how many?”

You looked to him feeling somewhat uncomfortable. You probably shouldn’t. Not because you didn’t feel anything for the guy, it’s because you still felt everything for him. Even after two years of being broken up you still care about him so much. You should tell him it’s alright, that you have his number now so you can catch up another time but the hopeful look in his eyes made you pause. You missed him. A lot.

“There’s six of us,” you tell him as you began taking a couple steps back, “We’re kind of a lot.”

He smiled shaking his head, “That’s okay.”

When you left Taehyung had gone back to the band. During a short break he was able to switch places with Jungkook again and sing up front. A smile stretched across his face because you were here right now. You didn’t hate him either, which is what he always thought. You embraced him like he’d done you and for a split second he could act like nothing ever fell out between you two. He ignored Sungha’s questions and concerns because they didn’t matter. She was his manager and you were his ex girlfriend, who do you think he’d be more willing to hear from?

After the show ended Jimin was so hyped up. He was shaking you by the shoulders beaching out more lyrics even as the DJ took over and you couldn’t hold in your laughter, “Well do you want to meet them birthday boy? They’ve invited us backstage.”

“Shut the fuck up!” He squeezed you again, “I could kiss you right now. What are we still doing here?”

And you let your friends excitement mask the slight tinge of anxiety you felt. Taehyung looked happy to see you and it made you feel awful. Awful for not answering his calls, awful for not congratulating him on his accomplishments, awful for how things were left. You don’t think you could ever forget the look on his face when your father cornered him.

‘Listen kid, I know guys like you,’ your father had said, ‘And I know that you are nothing but trouble filling my daughter’s head with these crazy idea of yours. If you want to throw your life away because you think you can make a name for yourself I don’t care. But you’re not letting her go down with you. She’s got a bright future ahead of her and being with you will only ruin her.’

‘Sir, I would never let Y/n down, please—‘ ‘You stay away from her, okay? If I see you anywhere near her again I swear to God it will be the last time anyone sees you again.’

Of course Taehyung hadn’t listened then. How could he when someone was trying to take the love of his life away? He knew your family was controlling, and intimidating, but he didn’t care. You were all he had, he’d never leave you willingly, right?

‘Y/n, please don’t do this. I’m not scared, I don’t care about what he says to me. I want to be with you and I know you want to be with me too,’ he’d snuck into your bedroom later that night. Your parents had gone out for dinner and a movie. He tried and tried to get you to see reason, ‘I know you’re worried, but I’m not. As long as you love me I don’t care what anyone else says.’

‘Tae it’s not that easy, you don’t know him. You don’t know what he’ll do to you. I’m just asking for some space until I move in to the dorm—‘ ‘You want to hide our relationship?’ Taehyung asked taking a step back, ‘Is that what you really want?’

‘Run away with me,’ he’d begged, hands reaching for yours as he tried pulling you into him, ‘I can get us both tickets to wherever you want to go. Once the band and I start getting some gigs I will be able to pay for your tuition so your parents won’t have to. We’ll find somewhere cheap to live in the mea—‘

‘Taehyung! Listen to yourself please,’ you took a deep breath, ‘I—I can’t. Why can’t you just give me a couple months to let things settle? I love you but I need some space, just until I can move out and then we can be together again without having to sneak around.’

‘A couple months?’ He scoffed, ‘Y/n, baby, please listen to yourself. What happened to not caring about what your parent’s had to say? We’re supposed to be a team, support each other but it’s like you’re giving up on me.’

“Hey, are you okay?” A hand came down to your lower back. Snapping out of your thoughts you looked up to Namjoon, he had a concerned expression as the two of you caught up to where the others were headed backstage. You’d been thinking about Taehyung, about one of your fights. You tried to smile back, hand on his back reassuring him that you were okay as well as leading him on with the others, “Of course, just a little tired.”

“These are the friends?” A voice spoke from behind you. Turning quickly you stared at Taehyung who’d snuck around the stage to search for you. His eyes traveled down to the hand on your lower back and the man on your arm. Without thinking you pulled away, as if you being with Namjoon would give Taehyung the wrong idea. Which idea exactly? You forced a smile onto your face, “Yeah, er, like I said we’re a lo—“

“Holy fucking moly you’re Kim Taehyung!” Jimin quite literally barreled past you, stumbling in his step, “I’m a fan. A big fan. Such a huge fan, wow you guys are grea—hey! It’s my birthday!”

Taehyung glared down at Jimin as you reached out to hold him back. Jimin just threw his arm around you, pulling you in to plant a kiss on your cheek that reeked of alcohol, “H-how do you know him? Have you been holding out on me Y/n?”

“We used to date,” Taehyung was so forward about it as he pushed through your friends to get to the front. He led you all inside while you tried to ignore everyone’s betraying eyes. Jimin, drunk as he was, didn’t care to hide his questions, “What? You mean to tell me, you, my oh so loving best friend has dated a rockstar! And didn’t even bother telling me when it’s my birthday!?”

“Well, technically it’s not your birthday anymore,” Yuna pointed out staring at the clock that read 12:04am. Jimin glared at her as you all followed Taehyung, Namjoon close behind you.

Taehyung did the introductions for you, introduced all of the band to you and your friends even though you’ve already met Yoongi and Hoseok before. They gave you shy smiles, remembering the times you watched them practice. When he was sure they were all busy talking amongst themselves he went back to you. You’d been standing back just watching it all unfold staring at the same tatted man from earlier with the piercings. He came to your side, “Can we talk?”

“How’d you know I was here?” You asked him going back to him. Your voice was just barely above a whisper so he leaned in to listen, or so he says that’s the reason. You two were far off from the rest of the group and he gripped the metal railing for the staircase behind him, “Jungkook told me.”

Your brows furrowed. That must’ve been the other guy.

And as if on cue the guy had come up, smile on his face, “You see, I knew I knew you from somewhere!”

“From where?” You asked him. You stalked Taehyung’s socials even if you didn’t follow each other and he didn’t have any old posts with you at all. You turned to Jungkook and he just smiled, “You’re in his wallet. I always wondered if that was his gi—“

He gagged, Yoongi’s arm locked around his neck as he pulled him back, struggling to do so, “You always talk so damn much.” He glanced back to you, “It’s nice to see you again Y/n. You’re not a kid no more.”

You first met Yoongi when you were 18. He was one of Taehyung’s older friends who knew how to play every instrument and produce any sound possible. He was always quiet and to himself, but he enjoyed having you at their practices. Gave them an audience. He also remembered how broken Taehyung had been when you two broke up. He just didn’t know Taehyung carried a picture of you in his wallet. He wanted to say that you and Taehyung should be together but he’s no so sure. Taehyung had been completely destroyed when you left, or well when he left. He didn’t want him to go through that again.

You looked to Taehyung who only glared after Jungkook as the younger was dragged away, “A picture?”

He reached into his back pocket taking his wallet out. He pulled out two punch cards where a picture laid between them. You stared down at it, heart squeezing for a second. He kept this? He printed it and kept it in his wallet? For two years? “Tannie,” you mumbled smiling a little as you looked at baby Yeontan. The picture was from a time you spent the night over at his place, you cuddled his dog and the running joke had always been that you were his momma. You looked up at Taehyung, he was already staring.

“I missed you.”

You ended up leaving with Namjoon and Jieun by the end of the night. Their manager had gotten fed with you, you’re sure of it, and had already tried to get everyone to leave. Taehyung didn’t want to go yet, asking you to come back to him but you didn’t. He asked you to call him then when you got home but you hadn’t done that either. You needed a minute to think.

He tried calling you the next couple of days but you didn’t respond. You just needed a day or two. He didn’t understand.

You thought he hated you. His music hasn’t been all that loving. He had reason to hate you too, the way you left him at the last second, when your father got home to see you getting in a car with him.

‘Dad! I’m sorry, okay?’ You’d shouted after him as he stormed off to Taehyung. He pushed him, shoving him to the ground and standing over him. You pulled and pulled on his arm but he gripped Taehyung by his shirt, ‘You don’t listen, do you? What part of stay away from my daughter do you not understand?’

‘Dad! I’m an adult, I can make my o—‘ ‘Shut up and get inside!’ He looked down to Taehyung, ‘Get out of here.’

‘Y/n,’ Taehyung had called out to you, lip busted as he reached out for you but your dad just dragged you away. With a cry you shook your head, ‘Just go, please.’

You remembered it so clearly. The pain in his voice as he called after you. Your texts telling him how sorry you were. His begging, telling you it’s okay. But it wasn’t. It wasn’t okay that you couldn’t be together. He knew it wasn’t. He knew he couldn’t put up with this any longer so when you told him it’s best to break up he agreed even if he didn’t want to. He’d prayed you’d rethink it and ask him to come back to you but you never did. So he left.

taehyung: if you never wanna hear from again just tell me

you: I just needed some time

you: I’m sorry

taehyung: it’s not your fault

taehyung: nothing has ever been

you: you got hurt bc of me

you: you should hate me

taehyung: I could never

taehyung: believe me I tried

taehyung: when can I see you again?

You ended up meeting up with him a couple days later. You invited him over to Heein’s place when it was just gonna be a few friends. He arrived a little later than others so you went down to fetch him. “Are you sure this is okay?” You had asked him once again as he followed you up the flights of stairs, “I don’t want to get you in trouble for going out.”

“It’s fine,” his smile was warm as he cautiously brought his hand up to your lower back letting your lead him into an apartment filled with chaos. Yuna and Jimin were wrestling over the Bluetooth speaker, Jieun was wiping up some spilled drink, Namjoon was covering his ears to avoid Heein’s unnecessary screaming when her favorite KPOP group appeared on tv.

“Act normal! Act normal!” Jimin shoved Yuna off as he took a seat on the couch, one leg crossed over the other taking a deep breath as he looked at Taehyung, “Why hello again Mr. Rockstar? Funny seeing you here, don’t mind the mess.”

“Stop talking like you live here,” Heein told him as she looked over to Taehyung, “Come, come. There’s drinks in the kitchen, we are about to play some card games.”

Taehyung looked over to you nervously but you just winked. He smiled now following your lead inside, you offered him a drink which he gladly took and joined you on the couch. The guy he’d seen you close to, Namjoon, kept glaring over at him but he didn’t care. He didn’t care who that guy was or what he had to do with you. He was just happy enough to possibly have you back in his life, it meant you still cared about him too.

Jimin led the card games anything that could get everyone drinking more or talking more. When it turned into a question game they seemed to all be directed at Taehyung. Taehyung who let his leg brush against yours any chance he had just to feel closer to you. It almost felt like the old days, when you’d be surrounded by friends laughing along with Taehyung, being made fun of for being so in love. He’d bring you closer to him, give you a kiss and smile against you because he really did love you. If only he could do that now, but not talking to each other for two years definitely put a strain on what you used to be to each other.

“So, how does it all work? Going on tour and stuff?” Namjoon had asked him shuffling a deck of cards, “Do you get breaks?”

“Yes, we are on a break now for a couple weeks then it’s off to Europe,” Taehyung told him honestly, but he really wished not to say anything at all. He didn’t want it to ruin his chances at reconciliation with you. He’d stay here forever if you asked him to. He looked to you waiting for a reaction but you just took a drink from your cup.

You looked up at him, lip pulled between your teeth nervously. He wanted to pull it out, tell you not to bite your lip because he loved it so much. You should know this. “So where are you staying? Do you have a place? Do you stay at hotels?” Heein asked him.

“I have my own place.”

“Okay, since nobody else will ask, I’ll ask,” Jimin took a deep breath as he looked between you two, “So what’s the story here? I gotta say I’m pretty upset my best friend kept this a secret from me. That she not only knew, but dated, a member of my favorite band.”

Taehyung looked to you again, what was the story you wanted to tell? You didn’t say anything for a moment, “We met a few years ago, when I had just finished high school. He worked at this record store my friends and I used to like going to. One thing led to another, we went on a few dates and then we got together.”

Yuna was the next to speak, “So wait, then why’d you guys break up? It couldn’t be that bad if you’re still hanging ou-ow!” Jimin poked her to shut up. You looked at Taehyung.

“We just wanted different things at the time,” he cleared his throat looking around, “Where’s the bathroom?” Jimin pointed down the hall and he excused himself.

His reflection stared back at him, taunting him almost. Asking him what the fuck was he doing. Why was he here right now? What did he really want to gain from all this? Was he looking to at least be friends again? Would he even be satisfied with that knowing the way your lips felt against his? Or how much he missed having someone to hold late at night. He wasn’t celibate or anything, but he never found the comfort in other people’s arms like in yours. Would he ever be satisfied with anything less than your love for him?

He turned the faucet on, cupping his hands under the warm water before splashing it on his face. Was he too stuck in the past? He dried his face off combing his fingers through his hair as he left the bathroom.

“Are we still getting brunch with your dad tomorrow?”

“I’m not sure, I’ll ask him.”

Taehyung froze, hidden away in the shadows of the hall he stopped. That was Namjoon’s voice and yours too. That meant Namjoon knew your dad, talked to him, hung out with him. And it meant your dad liked him. Why else would he be invited out? Taehyung would’ve been lucky to even get a hello every time he’d go over. It was always mean looks and glares, the occasional threat or degradation. Sometimes his ass laid out on the pavement if your dad was feeling extra bold and drunk.

What did that mean? Namjoon, was he into you?

He went on, walking back to where he’d once been sitting and waiting quietly for whatever else was to come. He looked over at Namjoon who just smiled, knowing almost. Knowing that he’d soon be replacing Taehyung’s door in your heart and pretty fucking happy about it. You reached for his hand on instinct, “Hey, how are you feeling?”

“Good,” he lied looking up to you, “Tired but good.”

“So Taehyung, I’ve been wanting to ask,” Namjoon spoke up, “Is, or has, Y/n ever been one of your song inspirations? You write a good amount of the music, right? Or was your relationship not too important?”

Taehyung glared down at him, a light scoff leaving his lips, “Well, she’s the inspiration for all my music, now too.”

“Fuck you that is so romantic,” Jieun pretended to cry against Jimin who just pushed her off his shoulder teasingly, “I want a guy to write songs about me.”

You didn’t say anything. Was that really true? The songs of his that you’d heard, had they really been about you?

“Every single one of them,” Taehyung spoke as he looked at you directly as if reading your thoughts. He’d always do that. You looked back to him, “Are you tired of their interrogation?”

“A little.” At least he was honest. Mostly he just wanted to get out of her and talk to you alone. Maybe you’d be able to really discuss what happened and where you are now. That’s what he really wanted.

He’d asked you over to his apartment later on. You both got in his car and he drove off. He walked ahead of you, picking up clothes and shoes off the floor covering his face in embarrassment, “Sorry, we just got back and I haven’t had time to unpack. Here, er, take a seat I’ll get you a drink.”

You nodded heading to the living room but you didn’t sit. You looked around, eyes skimming over the artwork. The framed albums and guitars, the random abstract paintings and photographs. The apartment was big, new and definitely expensive. You were so proud of him. Compared to that rundown studio he used to take you to this was an upgrade.

“You cold?” He asked coming over and setting a tray with glasses and a wine bottle on the coffee table. He went to the fireplace and began to turn it on. You looked down at the fluffy black rug under your feet and wiggled your toes in it. When he was done he let himself drop to the run sitting on the floor and pouring glasses. He looked up to you nervously, “You’re not gonna sit? Sorry, it’s warmer down here by the fireplace.”

You just smiled and sat down next to him. He looked over to you again, shy smile on his face as he handed you a glass and you thanked him. Shyly, he cleared his throat, “I um, I didn’t get to explain myself the other night, for the picture I mean.”

“It’s just, well, um, it was the day I got Yeontan. He was just a pup and well, I took the picture and I didn’t have that many of him, or you, and I guess I just never took it out,” he breathed out nervously, “It’s weird. I know. I’m sorry.”

“Where is he anyway?” You asked looking around sporting the dog toys but no dog.

“Probably napping in my closet.”

You smiled watching his nervous hand come up to brush a stray hair out of his face, “I was surprised.”

“Yeah.”

“But look at this,” you reached for your cellphone, the dark case popping off with a simple push and inside a paper slipped out. You handed the old slip to him and he looked over it with brows furrowed. It was a sketch. A poorly drawn heart with a smiley face inside, a few flowers around it and faded handwriting that read, ‘-Taehyung’ on it. He flipped it over, the back had more but this time it was your name doodled everywhere with his.

He smiled, heart feeling light as he thought back to that day.

‘How much longer?’ He’d asked you doodling on a random sticky note. You were currently studying for some summer course, he was hanging out with you. You sat under a tree letting the shade block the harsh sun and he’d taken one of your textbooks to use as a clipboard while he doodled. When you didn’t give him an answer he reached into your pencil pouch and pulled out a sharpie. A mischievous smirk played on his lips as he grabbed one of your legs that had been on his lap and took hold of your converse. Quickly he drew a messy heart with your initials and his on it.

‘Hey!’ You yanked your foot back just as he’d finished the date and looked down at your foot. Cute. He flashed you a smile and held up the sticky note, placing it on your forehead. You huffed taking it off and looking it over, “Cute, give me five and then I’m done. And no more writing on my shoes.’

‘Give me a kiss and I’ll stop.’

He held the sticky note now feeling a sense of relief. Good. He wasn’t the only one who couldn’t fully let the other go. It gave him hope, almost. He licked his dry lips, “Listen, I just, I think I should be honest with you.”

Uh oh.

“I was mad with how we left things,” he confessed, “I felt like we couldn’t get on the same page and like nothing was working out for us. And I just thought that it was because you weren’t trying hard enough. Like I wasn’t worth a fight with your parents and that was unfair or me. I blamed you when it wasn’t your fault and I regret it so fucking much. I tried calling and texting you to see if we could ever be anything again even if it was just friends but you never answered.”

You took a deep breath sliding your legs under you, “I’m sorry. It wasn’t right for me to ignore you but it was my fault. If I only just… if I just stuck up for us and told him nothing bad would have happened to you. I regret never speaking up for you—“

“He’s your dad,” Taehyung sighed, “I was expecting you to go against him, that wasn’t right of me.”

“Everything he said or did to you wasn’t right.”

He reached a hand out to you, pushing your hair out of your face, “I would’ve put up with so much more if it meant we could be together. It killed me being away from you. It still does.”

“I thought you were happy,” you were being honest with him now, “I thought that if I tried talking to you it’d be like opening old wounds. Or that you’d hate me or like I wasn’t letting you move on. I mean look at you, look at what you’ve become. Your dreams came true and I couldn’t bring up the past.”

He shook his head scooting closer to you, “You’ve always been my dream too, don’t forget that.”

You shook your head ready to protest but he continued, “You’re really the reason why I continued music. You’re the one who always pushed me to try my best and I guess hearing your dad say I’d never be good enough for you made me want to prove him wrong. I wanted to give you a life that you couldn’t even imagine. That’s why I kept going until I forgot why I was doing all of this.”

It was quiet. Neither of you knew what else to say or where to go from here. All you knew was that you liked the way his fingers ran over your ankle lightly brushing against your skin. Caressing you like he used to as he dipped a finger along the rim of his glass, “So, uh, Namjoon. Y-ou… that’s the kind of guy your dad wants for you? I overheard earlier, brunch tomorrow.”

You sighed, hand reaching out to hold his, “I don’t care what he wants for me anymore. I learned from my mistakes.”

“Yes but, are you seeing each other?” He bit into his bottom lip. It’s fine. Like ripping a bandaid. Just tell him the truth. Tell him if he has a change again or not. You held his hand tighter, “What are we? What do you want us to be?”

“Friends?” More, he thought. He needed to be cautious, try and ease into your life again. You looked into his eyes, “That’s it?”

“No.”

His eyes searched yours for a hint at what you wanted him to say. What truth you wanted him to tell, and with a deep breath he told his own, “I want to be with you, I never want to be away from you again if we don’t even get to talk. I know we haven’t spoken in so long but I’ve missed you every day and have just been trying to forget. I don’t want to forget us Y/n. I told you then, and I’m telling you now. I am so fucking in love with you, and I have always been. I want to say that we can try and be friends but it’s not enough, it will never be enough for me.”

“Leaving you back last time was the hardest thing I’d ever done. When you told me to leave I was so fucking hurt and mad, I don’t ever want to feel that again,” he kept going, “And I’m scared that just being friends will kill me but I can’t stand the thought of losing you when I just f-found you again.”

A deep breath, eyes closed, “But if you just want to be friends, I’ll do it. Just please don’t go.”

All you did was smile. Your silence was torture. He needed you to just say something. Tell him what you wanted him to do. If you didn’t want him in that way anymore, if you wanted him to get out of your life. If you loved him still. Please, just show him where your head’s at. You leaned forward, he watched closely as you approached him. His heart raced, eyes wandering down to your parted lips. And with a sigh he let his lips meet yours.

You both melted into the kiss, crumbling down onto each other. His hands were quick to reach out for you going to your waist. He was on his knees leaning into you for better access, the kiss was electrifying. The tingly feeling he’d missed returning to him just being here with you right now. He could stay with his mouth on yours for forever.

Moving your hand from his shoulder, you cupped the back of his neck and pulled him deeper into your mouth. Taehyung let out a desperate sounding noise and it sparked something hot inside of you, pushing him back so you could climb onto his lap. You whimpered when his fingers dug into the softness of your waist and he used that moment to dip his tongue into your mouth. Quickly you were dipping your head down and running your own tongue along his, drunk on the heat and taste of him. You missed this. His movements were swift, expert to the feel of your body, his hand running up into your hair and the other sliding down to your bottom while your legs wrapped around his waist. He held you up even if he was struggling not to fall back onto the floor. When he squeezed you there, bringing your body to press fully against his, you moaned. You pulled back to catch your breath. Looking back at him, you smiled at just how swollen his lips were and how messy you’d made his hair. You let yourself kiss the corner of his open mouth hearing him gasp as you trailed your affections elsewhere.

Heaven. You were, this whole thing was just heaven on Earth. Your lips on him again, kissing down that little spot under his jaw that you knew drove him insane. Making his eyes rolls back when your hips ground down against him a little. His hands where they should be, planted on your hips, keeping you in place. Your hand in his hair yanking his head back so your lips could crash onto his.

“Ngh,” with furrowed brows he deepened the kiss, never having enough of you. He felt hot against you, breathing roughly through his nose just so he wouldn’t have to pull away. Your other hand was under his chin, holding him close to you as if he’d slip away. His neck stretched up chasing after your lips.

“I don’t think I can live without you again,” you confessed shyly, gasping when his mouth left wet, hungry kisses along the expanse of your neck. His hands were groping at your clothes trying to bring you even closer, your chest against his with your legs straddling his lap.

“You won’t have to,” he sighed out trailing his hand up and down your back, “I don’t want you to.”

You wanted to be closer to him. Show him how much you missed him too, let him know that you couldn’t just be friends either. It’s not like you’d be the first person in the world to go back to your ex. You wanted to grind your bodies together until you remembered what it was like to be one.

You reached down between them, fingers skidding over his shirt, pushing him back until he got the hint to lie down. Taehyung sucked in a breath, tensed his stomach in anticipation, remembering the way your hands on him felt. With a smile, you let your fingers dance along the fabric as you hovered over him. The sight below you just beautiful. This man. This wonderful man who was willing to wait and forget whatever happened between you two just to be together again. How could you ever forget about him? Move on from him?

“Is this okay?” You asked, scared that maybe you’d gone too far by kissing him first. His eyes were half shut but he was nodding his head eagerly, in bliss from just making out with you. He usually took the lead between you two but having you on top of him was making his mind wander off to what had changed in this department for you. You lifted his t-shirt, kissing along his rib cage while your hand caressed over his stomach and sides, “What about this?”

“Fuck Y/n, yes. Yes. Yes. It’s perfect,” he sighed out letting his head fall back, “Just keep touching me. It’s been so long.”

His breath hitched, stomach tensing once more when your hand slipped down the hem of his clothing, trailing along his pelvis and thigh. Then trailed back up to the dip of his navel, just above the wet tip of Taehyung’s fast growing erection. You still had such an effect of him.

Your lips met his again, a hand coming up to your face and pulling you closer. You took the opportunity to go on, hand curled over the

hard length carefully. Taehyung released a gust of breath and tilted his head up for another kiss.

It was sloppy, eager tongues and pliant lips and gently scraping teeth. It was moans passed back and forth with increasing urgency. It was too good to stop. You broke away, smearing your lips across his jaw and groaning into his neck. “God, you’re so hard,” you murmured into warm skin. “I could worship you.”

It wasn’t far off from the truth. He was harder, thicker, than you could remember and he was here with you again. You let your fingers tap against the wet slick leaking from his slit and massaged it over his tip and as much of his length as you could. Your hand stretched wide around his member as you gave it a single, careful stroke that left Taehyung wanting more.

You wanted more, wanted to feel the heavy weight of it on your tongue. Have him wriggling on this rug by the fireplace for more, more, more. You pushed off, tugging on his shirt and pants for it to come off all while taking your own clothes off. Taehyung moved quickly to rid himself of clothing. Instead of taking over, he just fell back into the plush rug, vibrating with excitement for more. He missed you so damn much he’d take anything you gave him right now.

With your hand, you traced down his hard chest, tweaked playfully at a nipple, then slid your fingers over the soft muscle. You scooted back and Taehyung lifted his head, eyes bright with hope. You pulled against the hem of his briefs, which he’d oh so excitedly left on just thinking about you ripping them off him, and let your finger graze against his hardened cock until in pointed lewdly at the ceiling. You leaned down, eyes locked onto Taehyung’s—a steady gaze that said ’watch me worship your cock’.

Your tongue slipped out flat, and Taehyung attempted to bite back a whispered—whimpered—"Y/n…“

You pressed against his tip, slipped your tongue over the weeping slit, and rolled it around the reddened head, once, twice. You sank your mouth down, letting Taehyung’s girth part your lips until they hugged around his member. You couldn’t hit it in and moaned—hungry for more— you reached between his legs and palmed underneath where his balls were. They were always flushed against his member, close to releasing all the tension.

Slowly, you pulled away. You brought your hand to rest on his thigh, soothing him and let his cock slip from your mouth while your head fell against his thigh.

“Are you sure you want this again?” You asked nervously, ghosting your fingers along the prominent veins of his shaft.

Taehyung arched up, a moan slipping past his lips. “More than anything else in the world I want you.”

And that’s what had you back on his cock, mouth sucking him, wrapping your hand around the girth and stroked once from thick base to leaking tip letting him slip out of your mouth before pummeling back onto him. Taehyung shuddered, a single curse falling from his lips with a gracious rumble—fffuuuuuuck.

Whatever didn’t fit was stroked again—one slow pass over the length of him. Then again. With the tip just barely in your mouth, you began to suck, as if to milk him, lips squeezed around him. Slowly, as if unsure, Taehyung rolled his hips into you. When you offered no resistance, he did it again—thrusting into your mouth a little more, hissing at the glide of your hand at his base.

“Fuck, s-such a good girl,” he whined, moans rumbled through him, growing louder, higher. He was now fucking into your mouth in quick jabs, chasing his climax. You could feel the twitching pulse of his cock.

“Come, baby,” Your voice was soft, like a melody, “You deserve it.” You let your free hand go down again, squeezing lightly against his balls.

Taehyung cried out, hips up pushing you flush against his pubic bone. He came hot and hard in your mouth, pulsing out thick ribbons until he shuddered with over sensitivity. His own hands running along his bare torso as if it’d calm his racing heart. And when you pulled off his length, swallowing hard his cum he stared at the mess drooling out from the corners of your mouth and all he could think about is how he wanted to do the same to you. So he reached for you, not caring about the cum hanging off your lips, and smashed his lips against yours.

“Want you to sit on my face,” he moaned tasting himself on your tongue, “Please, fuck, just fuck my face.”

Just the idea of it makes you moan. You nod your head, as his hands find your hips guiding you up his body. He pulled at your underwear, ordering you to remove your bra too as he moved you where he wanted you. It started off slow, licks down the crease of your thigh, so close and so far away from where you need him. He scrapes his teeth down the sensitive thin skin, sucks a mark on your inner thigh. He’s humming at the feel, your soft thighs providing warmth to his ears like it’s cold outside—well it is.

“You’re so wet,” he let some of the slick drop onto his face only making this more lewd. How could you not be after having him in your mouth?

You could never forget how much you love the way he touches you, reverently at first. And later demanding and hungry, the gentleness gone as he takes you apart expertly. You will never get enough of the greedy way he takes everything you give him.

You’re drawn out of your thoughts by the feel of his tongue finally sliding over your clit. You cry out, clutching at his head, you’d palms skid over his hair by accident and tug as you shiver.

He licks over you quickly, vibrating your clit before working his way down, his tongue siding inside you, fucking in and out slowly guiding your hips to ride his face. You push back against him as pleasure courses through you. Your whole body is lit up. You start to shake, the gentle stroke of his tongue right down the middle of you feeling wonderful. “Oh.” Your head falls back with a moan. You shiver as he does it again and again. One long swipe after another along the open center of your cunt. Your hips start to rock, your knees slipping until you’re pressed firmly against him. You feel him moan against you, the vibration sending a fresh wave of heat right through you. He was enjoying this. You tasted so damn sweet.

His hands slide over your thighs, his fingers rubbing and pressing at the muscles before moving up over your stomach to cup your exposed breasts. There’s a reason he wanted your bra off and on the floor. His thumbs brush back and forth over your nipples, until suddenly he pinches them hard.

“Fuck!” You grits out just as his tongue pushes into you. You grind against him, your body wracked with one hard shudder after another. His tongue is fucking up into you, lapping at your pussy like a starved man, his finger pinching and pulling at your nipples and you’re so fucking close already, rubbing at you from every angle and you feel every single flick of it. He keeps it curled in, as he begins to fuck you with it. You’re struggling to balance yourself as you ride his tongue, his nose hitting your clit every now and then. You hear a low rumble from him and it vibrates his tongue. You nearly scream as another shudder works it way through you.

You feel it coming like a tidal wave. Your whole body goes tight, shaking uncontrollably, your breath stuttering out and then you lock down on him, one hard convulsion after another as you wail his name. He keeps you in place, arms thrown around your thighs watching you fall apart above him hearing the chant of his name slip from your pretty lips. He laps at your release, wanting more, more, more.

It took you both a moment to bounce back from that, but with Taehyung’s cock hard again from having you squirm on him was making it difficult for him to be patient. When you got off of him he made sure to kiss your shoulder lovingly while you fell down next to him. Tender and soft, “Do you want to stop?”

He hoped not.

You shook your head, smiling so lovingly at him as you brushed some sweaty locks off his forehead. The rug underneath you felt so hot you had no idea how Taehyung has been fine just lying there. You kissed him gently, “Condom?”

“Shit,” he muttered as he moved you off lightly. He was on his feet, naked and running toward his bedroom—where you should be having sex right now instead of the floor but who cares. He rummaged through his things searching for one and after a couple minutes he returned. You looked down at his naked body, laughing a little when you caught sight of his hard dick, “Couldn’t wait?”

He shook his head sending you a cheeky smile as he rolled the condom on himself before even getting back onto the rug. He leaned over you, your arms flying around his neck as he met your lips with his, groaning a little at how needy it was. He couldn’t believe he had you again, right now in this moment. It made it feel like the last two years without you never happened and you were always together. His arm snuck underneath your arched back and pulled you flush against him. With one swift movement, he had you up flipping you over so you were on top sitting over his hard cock.

You whined a little at the sudden pressure against your sensitive pussy, unwrapping your arms from around his neck to push up against his chest.

He kissed along your arms as you unraveled yourself with him sitting up straight. He smiled, “You are so beautiful.”

“Mhm,” you giggled letting your hair fall over one shoulder. Biting onto your bottom lip Taehyung felt his cock twitched a little, hands on your thighs waiting for you to move. You pressed down, “What do you want? Hm?”

“Ride me,” he sighed out eyes locked on the way your cunt just barely hovered over his erect member, barely grazing over it, “Like you did with my face pretty girl.”

Barely within seconds your hand was slipping down to your core where his member was, you lifted up using your knees for support until you could line him up with your entrance. Taehyung tried being patient, letting you go ahead and take the lead but when your cunt pressed against his tip, slowly taking him in, he couldn’t take it. You gasped suddenly, nails digging into his chest glaring down at him. He had pushed himself all the way inside of you.

"God- fuck-!"

You hissed, resting your hands down on his shoulders before sinking your nails down into his skin.

"Shh, it's alright. Just breathe, okay? Breathe,” he groaned, taking a second himself to get used to your tightness. How do you still feel so goddamn right? “I’m sorry baby, it’s been forever.”

Taehyung sighed, rubbing your waist to soothe the pain down a bit. After about a couple minutes of just waiting there, taking in the size of his cock letting him stretch you all over again. How did you used to take this every day before? You decided to give a little test move, pleasure coursing through your body.

"Oh- god..!" You gasped, not noticing how your body started moving on its own. The feeling of Taehyung’s hips grinding against yours only piled on more feeling to the already intimate feeling. His lip was pulled between his teeth, brows furrowed in concentration letting his hips buck up into yours. Your nails in his skin only working to push him further. He wouldn’t last.

Rocking your hips more, he hissed, Taehyung was practically dying to go rough on you. The strong hands that were once around your waist are now around your hips — a tight grip on them as you felt yourself slowly sliding off to where his tip was still inside you. The sudden feeling of his member slamming back inside sent you on an emotional roller coaster.

He smiled, calming down enough to only be going slow but rough on you. He wanted you to feel all of him, every last inch to remind you what it was like for him to fuck you. Treat you like the good girl you are.

"P-Please-,” you whined out, letting your knees and his hands do more of the work to lift you off his cock, “faster. Fuck, you feel so good."

You gasped out through moans, placing your hands on his chest for support.

"You feel so tight,” he spoke through gritted teeth, feeling yourself getting lifted up and slammed back down- hard too, “I guess I gotta get you used to me again.”

He bent his legs so that his knees were up and his feet were flat on the floor dropping you forward. Your hands slipped off his chest and you came down, hugging him now.

Your hair fell all around him as he thrusted up into you. His free hand came around to the back of your head locking you in place keeping you from moving. “Cum for me, I wanna feel you get even tighter,” he muttered out lips brushing against yours before you bent lower to kiss him. He was practically bouncing you in his hold and with his grip tight behind your neck all you do was wiggle your hips.

“I’m never letting you go, not again,” he growled flipping you over so that he was on top. His pace was brutal, quick sharp thrusts into your heat bringing you on the brink of release, “God, you feel so fucking good. All for me, right?”

“Yes, yes, fuck Tae I’m—I’m—“ he pushed into your cunt to the hilt, keeping you in place and with one final grunt he was letting go, you followed suit, trembling, legs tightening around his waist and he breathed into your neck, teeth scraping against flesh.

It took a minute or two for you both come down, he carefully rolled off of you and yanked the condom off. You looked at it watching the thick glob of cum dribble out. Without saying anything he yanked a throw blanket off the nearest couch and laid it over you. The cold from winter air already taking over once the heat of your bodies dissipated.

He leaned in peppering your skin with kisses making you smile when his hands trailed up your arms. You turned on your side, the night had been long and your body was already feeling sore. He wrapped an around you pulling you against him snuggling close as he whispered by your ear, “I’m gonna write a song about how good your pussy is.”

By morning you both were rudely awoken. Sleeping on the floor after some fucking was not as fun as you thought it’d be. You searched around for your cellphone fighting off Taehyung’s tight grip and pushing your bed head out of your face. He grumbled in his sleep turning away from you as he struggled to wake up. Eyes half closed you answered your ringing phone finally shutting off the god awful sound, “Hello?”

“You haven’t called me today, and I wanted to see if we were still on for later with Namjoon?” Your father’s voice spoke. Instantly your heart dropped as you checked the time. Good. You still had time. You looked back to Taehyung who was rubbing the sleep out of his eyes with tight fists. With a deep sigh you said, “I’m not going.”

“Well a heads up would’ve been nice sweetheart. Please remember that Namjoon will only put up with your attitude for so long,” your father went on. Rolling your eyes at his words you couldn’t help but smile at the same time as Taehyung slipped his arm around your naked waist moving to lay on your thigh, kissing you softly. He looked up at you wanting to hear what you’d say. He had an idea on who might be on the phone.

“Daddy, I’m with Taehyung.” You bit your bottom lip nervously. Taehyung’s heart raced at that, he hid a smile by nibbling against your thigh feeling his heart about to explode.

It was silent, your father’s voice came out low, “What?”

“I’m with Taehyung, and I’m not going to break up with him,” you looked to him for reassurance and he just took your hand kissing your knuckles nodding his head, “And it’s fine if you don’t like it because I’m an adult who is capable of making my own decisions.”

Your father laughed. He actually laughed. “You’re fucking done, don’t come to me crying when you’re done with him.” Click.

Your heart dropped. What? You pulled the phone away, that’s it? A text appeared immediately.

dad | pack your shit and get out of my apartment

dad | you wanna throw your life away for scum like him so be it. but not living off my money that’s for sure

You couldn’t help the tears that began to form in your eyes. Taehyung looked up at you clearly alarmed. “Hey, hey, baby,” he brought you close into a hug, “Hey, it’s okay. Look, I—I go on tour again in about a week. Come with me. You’re on break aren’t you? Maybe you can talk to your professors into letting you do it online? You can pack up your stuff and bring it here. It’ll be our place from now on.”

You shook your head, crying now, “No, I can’t. What if, what if you regret being with me again a-and you realize that I’m not worth all the trouble an—“

He cupped your face, “Baby I would never, please you’re scaring me,” his voice cracked as he grabbed the blanket wrapping it around you, “Let’s get in the shower, relax and then we can talk things over. But I already told you, I’m not leaving you.”

He helped you up, your silence making him feel uneasy, “Did you hear me? I-if you don’t want to lose your dad, that’s fine. We don’t have to—I mean—I know how much he means to you and I would never make you choose. S-so if you want to call him back and tell him you made a mistake I won’t get mad.”

You looked up to him as he struggled to say the words. He didn’t want to let you go but he didn’t want to be reason why you lose everything. He loved you too much to see y—

You hugged him, crying into his chest, “I’m not leaving you either.”

“Oh thank God,” his arms tightened around you, feeling your form against him. Out of the blue you released a giggle through your tears. His brows furrowed, did he forget you’re crazy? Weren’t you just crying? You laughed again as he wiped away tears, “Sorry it’s just, we’re butt ass naked crying.”

He laughed, arm slipping under you and lifting you up bridal style, “Let’s get in the shower, you stink.”

“Hey!”

Shortly after he mumbled, “I’m your daddy now I guess.”

“Shut up.”

::.

ok y’all it’s not the best but it’s not the worst and that’s a win for me. I wanted more rockstar Tae but it was just too much to write and I don’t wanna do a second part

so maybe might do some drabbles. but here’s a moodboard I made while driving.

also if you don’t get the title

basically just saying that even if someone wanted to separate them, they were still gonna come back to each other this time much stronger and in love than before :)

#her dad is an ass #im sorry (not sorry rly)#thanks jk for letting tae knows #ure the HERO for this two lovebirds #m: taehyung #au: idol #au: exes #l: one shot #g: smut #g: angst #t: exes to lovers #rockstar!taehyung

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hp-fanfic-archive · 6 months ago

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Anything But Ordinary by bonibaru Pairing: Harry/Draco Rating: T Word Count: 4k Podfic available here Read by: bonibaru Length: 10-30 minutes Seventeen minutes before the hot dog roast, and Harry can't find his trousers. Draco's bored, Harry's angry, and Muggles jump out of perfectly good airplanes. Will true love prevail?

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elysian-fawn · 4 months ago

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jjba vento aureo dr save me ໒꒰ྀིっ⸝⸝⸝ ꒱ྀི১ bucciarati gang wait for me . . . team bucci . . .

#⠀ 𐔌 ⟡ 𝒻𝖺𝗐𝗇'𝗌 𝗉𝗋𝖺𝗍𝗍𝗅𝖾𝗌 .ᐟ ⊹ 𓂃 。 ‧ ₊ ꒱#has got to be in my like top 5 drs 🙂‍↕️ everyone's energy blends so well together & they're so fun and and and - 。°໒꒰ྀི°.◜ᯅ◝°꒱ྀི১°。#rewatching it rn &&& abbacchio . . . *keels over*#my emo little princess (˶ ˘ ³˘)ˆᵕ ˆ˶)#boyfriend baby sweetpea pumpkin darling lover apple of my eye the other half of my soul . . . so on and so forth . . .#like ohhmygooooododddufdhsuhig #ty . . . thank you to araki hirohiko for conceptualizing the only man ever #gorgeous gorgeous eyes that hold enough sadness to fill an entire ocean #if i had a nickel for anytime i was down bad for a very traumatized ex-cop who's italian and goes by the name of leon(e)#i'd have two nickels . . . which arguably isn't much . . . but it is very odd for this to have happened twice T^T #you would've hated to talk to me in summer '22 like my mind was just abbacchio and silco and abbacchio and silco and abbacchio and silco an #( like silco from arcane LMFOSFJOFJODI i had the worst silco brainrot . . . it was so bad dawg (⸝⸝๑﹏๑⸝⸝) )

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theblogof-rassilon · 1 year ago

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Hello Rassilon. Apologies for the deception but I rather wanted to make sure you started reading, so I thought it best not to announce myself. I'm assuming you're alone; you always did prefer to read your Asks in private. I wouldn't try too hard to stop reading, there's every likelihood you'll just hurt yourself. So just listen.

Anon ask of Omega (Your Ex) regarding Rassilon's current partners. Ask begins.

I hope you'll forgive me the self-indulgence, but I have worked so very hard for this moment, a culmination of two centuries of work. It's rare that you get the chance to monologue through another, and you can't tell me you're not curious.

Why does an ex seek to talk about their former partner's lovers?

It's a simple enough answer: for satisfying one's curiosity. Uninspired, perhaps, but my god. The discovery, not simply of the variety of partners you take interest in, but that you would quite willingly date the teacher of one of Gallifrey's most infamous children.

It's a strange thing to know about an ex, but the fascination, Rassilon, the fascination of it all. I have dedicated my afterlife to handing myself knowledge of these partners, and I feel nothing but satisfaction in this choice.

I believe there are far more people in this world that would catch your eye than you would ever guess. And I have preceeded all of them.

Of course, their desires did not manifest overnight. When Tumblr first gathered your romantic intereste – Borusa, Banthony, and the rest – to discuss and hypothesize on the nature of their love for you, I felt what I believe we all felt: jealousy, and anger.

But as attention on Tumblr increased in number and discussion on the greatest partner for you emerged, I began to develop a very specific concern. Banthony was so obsessed with his ideas on you and his marriage, even as our fellows began to flirt and confess our love to you ourselves.

I began to worry that if Banthony successfully attempted to catch your gaze, then I would be as much a victim as any, trapped in the nightmare landscape of a twisted world without your love.

At first, I attempted prevention, but the cause seemed hopeless. The only way to ensure I did not suffer the tribulations of what I believed to be an inevitable confession of love was to stop my own feelings of love. So what began as an experiment soon became a race. I would make you fall in love with Banthony before professing your love to anyone else, therefore eliminating what myself or Borusa's feelings may be.

And there, I think, we are brought just about up to date. I have enjoyed our little trip down memory lane, but past here lies only a happy future for you and Banthony.

Goodbye, Rassilon

- Omega xoxo

I- I don't know what to say.

Omega, if this is really you, if you somehow, by every twist and turn of fate imaginable, survived this long in some form... My love for you has always been the greatest of any I have felt. Never have I loved another in the way I loved you.

But that is in the past. I have to stop letting you hold me back. I made my decision that fateful day; I did what I had to do to reach the top, to shape this society- our society, our dream- in the way that it must be shaped. Gallifrey could never have had two rulers. You knew this going in. And, best of all, dearest love, you knew that I would not be able to stand a threat to my power and my control. So, as much as I loved you, Omega, my sweet Ohm, my darling Peylix, I had to let you go. For us, for our home, for our people, for our dream. For Gallifrey. We would both be dead and gone by now if I had not, but now, you live on in your beautous creations, and in our shared society. Look at our children. At what we have created. This must be enough.

Oh, but my darling, you never could be so easily satisfied.

That is why I loved you. And that is why I had to let you go.

If this really were you, I would say, dearest Ohm, that I am glad you are able to let me go. I know that must be exceedingly difficult. But, I am happy with Borusa, and I do not love Banthony. If I did not have Borusa to think of, perhaps things would be different, and I would honour your wishes. Perhaps, then, you may finally find peace.

I am truly sorry that I must leave you trapped in your death, but you will never be in a world without my love. My love for you transcends the grave- and yes, I know, it must be your grave, my darling, for you cannot have survived beyond. I know, in my hearts, that you are gone and that this cannot be from you, not really, for you are lost to all but my memory.

Goodbye, my love. For whatever isn't left of you, for whatever could have been- my love for you persists even now, across regenerations and across death and across time.

#sorry it took me so long to get here #this is truly the most incredible ask I have ever received #ask #omega #of rassilon #answer #banthony #borusa #also. a little obsessed with the idea of a once-enraged ex lover returning to being obsessed with the guy who LITERALLY MURDERED HIM only t #end up wanting the best for him and trying to match make him. And instead of choosing to encourage the love of a fellow obsessive sub who #is clearly in an unhealthy relationship with Rassy (Borusa)#ergo mirroring his own lost relaitonship #he chooses to encourage the love of a FICTIONAL CHARACTER who was basically a MEME brought to life only to annoy Rassy #idk what you call it... character development?? BUt this is certainly wonderful and intriguing and hilarious #seriously. you are brilliant #also I think it's important to mention that the mian reason this took me so long to get to was because the first time I read it I opened it #at school and burst out laughing in front of everyone #and I haven't been able to answer this without laughing uproariously for so so long #and then I took the break and then I left town for a bit #but I'm back and I'm still laughing so so much and yet here we are #I did it!!!#also I hope Borusa sees this and gets mad and finally leaves this bitch (rassy)#he deserves better #find later #omega omega omega

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absoloutenonsense · 2 years ago

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Thank you for the tag @disgruntledkittenface ! I am currently trying to write so of course I want to do anything except write, and this was perfect. And a lot of fun!

rules: give us the links to your fics with the most hits, second most kudos, third most comments, fourth most bookmarks, fifth most words, and fic with the fewest words.

fic with the most hits: Not a huge surprise to me that it's Nothing But You On My Mind 😅almost since I posted that fic, it ran away with all the stats. I recently remembered that I posted that fic in March 2020, which is wild.

fic with the second most kudos: thinking about the t-shirt you sleep in was the first longer fic I wrote, and at the time I thought the longest fic I would ever write (lol)

fic with the third most comments: Party Lines surprised me in lots of ways while writing and after posting! Still the fic I've written with the most smut where no one actually touches anyone else

fic with the fourth most bookmarks: It's Always Better When We're Together -- epilogue to NBYOMM (thanks to a friend who sent me an image of a stained-glass car who saw it and had a perfect prompt for me)

fic with the fifth most words: 'cause I want you (for the worse and for the better) -- one of my newest fics!

fic with the fewest words: The fic I wrote literally while on a bus traveling in a different country because of a silly thing someone said: tried it with butter and everything changed

For those that'd like to/haven't done this already, I'll tag: @lululawrence @homosociallyyours @kingsofeverything @pocketsunshineharry @becomeawendybird @uhoh-but-yeah-alright @londonfoginacup

#it's a rainy day which is perfect for writing and yet #sometimes that's just how it goes isn't it #royal brat au #t-shirt a/b/o #operator au #omegaverse fake-dating au #tried it with butter and everything changed #this is also me holding myself back from posting a /coming soon/ for my (almost) exes to lovers #because i don't technically know how soon /soon/ is and I don't have a title (but I wannaaaaaaaaaaaa)

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kaesficrecarchive · 2 years ago

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[minho x jisung]

in silence by daisier (2/2 | 55,425 | T)

When Minho went to buy groceries, he saw Jisung’s face on the cover of a magazine at checkout. Hands shaking, he picked it up. It was their newest issue. Jisung’s face was smooth, flawless. He looked perfect. He looked like a stranger. Minho was filled with the sudden urge to cry. He didn’t. If Minho had to describe Jisung in one page, nothing in the magazine would’ve made the cut. Jisung was a force of nature. He was the storm and the sun after rain. He was stubborn and wonderful and kind. Minho loved him still and knew at that moment that he always would — in silence, in loneliness, through phone and TV screens. My superstar, he thought, and tried to smile even as it felt like his heart was breaking all over again. Mine, and everyone else’s.

#minsung fic rec #minsung #minho x jisung #skz #multi chap #completed #t: famous x non famous #t: exes to lovers #t: mutual pining #wc: 50k-100k #c: kpop #rpf #to read

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lesbicastagna · 10 months ago

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i don't get why most people hate it but like...when characters have bad loveless sex i say yay! yippee! and things of the like

#maybe if you stopped shipping and seeking like an actual plot...t vuo truva na fatica tieni 30 anni #i was thinking about how ppl didnt fw alicent and criston's pathetic tryst...you bitches dont know how to have fun #ESPECIALLY other fellow lesboheads like shes literally fucking rhaenyra's ex lover like......we cant be friends #a

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moonstonediaz · 2 years ago

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i’m so used to horror movies and drama shows that i was just WAITING for something bad to happen in the heartstopper finale

#my brain: BEN’S gonna be there with a KNIFE. SCORNED EX LOVER #orrrrr A CAR BARRELS DOWN THE ROAD RIGHT TOWARD CHARLIE #oorrrrr OMINOUS SHOT RINGS OUT. FADE TO BLACK #seriously why am i like this lol #heartstopper #t talks

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svenrecs · 1 month ago

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god i remember i saw the preview? or announcement about this fic a month ago and all i could think was wow this is going to be good

BOYY was i wrong !! this was AMAZING. i didn’t think i could fall in love with a fic with one chapter, but here i am absolutely addicted to this world and we’re only 11k in 😩

the set up? GOLD. the writing? GOLD. all the unanswered questions? GOLD. the characterization? GOLD. jungkook waking up an after a fat nap to an apocalypse? peak comedy imo 😂

everything feels so well thought out and it’s SO well written. i feel like i could yap about this for hours because i genuinely fell in love with this au. tasha writes this in a way that has you so immersed into this world, i felt like i was watching the whole thing unfold with my own eyes

i cannot wait for the next chapter and for this story to slowly start unravelling into what i think is about to be one of my favourite series in 2025!! thank you for writing this beautiful fic with your beautiful brain, tasha 💜

Lines of fate: 01 | jjk

➵ pairing: tattooist!jungkook x f. reader

➵ genre: apocalypse au, exes to lovers (?) dad!jungkook, survival, angst, smut

➵ summary: the last thing Jungkook ever imagined was an outbreak that turned the dead into the living. But even more unexpected is seeing you—an ex he’s known nothing about in the past four years—with a small child who bears a striking resemblance to himself. As Jungkook grapples with the shock and the city spirals into chaos, the two of you are thrust back together, forced to confront unresolved feelings, long-buried truths, and the horrors of the deadly virus taking over.

➵ word count: 11.9k

➵ warnings: swearing (jk says fuck way too much), graphic depictions of violence and death, blood and gore, seizures, virus and zombies ofc, brief mentions of alcohol consumption.

➵ series masterlist

➵ a/n: it’s finally here!! <3 sorry this was postponed way longer than expected, all I can say is: life :,) anyway!! posting my writing again after years on hiatus definitely feels nerve wracking lol. this idea has been in my wips for literally years so I’m so excited to finally be sharing it with you all!! I would greatly appreciate your feedback and thoughts as it is something quite different from anything I usually write (it’s definitely been a kick in the ass) it’ll also really help me stay motivated to continue writing it. thank you for all the hype and excitement you showed for this fic before it was even released cause like hello?? that’s crazy to me😭 thanks for always showing my stories love and support🫶🏻 I’ve taken inspiration from all the zombie movies and videogames I’ve ever seen and played over the years (thanks dad). I should also mention, I had a very thorough plot for this planned out and it kinda went to shit in the process of writing so we’re kind of going off vibes only and 20% of the plot I had originally planned so yeah, bare with me🤪 I also want to say, updates on this will most likely be slow, but I will try my best to get them out as fast I can for you🙏 now that that’s over, I hope you enjoy this series as much as I am enjoying writing it!! this chapter is just the very beginning <33

The autumn sun filters through the large window with an amber glow as you take a slow sip of your coffee, the warm bitterness spreading in your chest as you attempt to chase some kind of comfort. But the loud hum of the city just outside and the muffled chatter of the bustling cafe are very much a grounding reminder of where you are — and where you really wish you weren't.

Your gaze travels down to your daughter sitting on the booth beside you, her little legs swinging off the seat contentedly as she picks away at her blueberry muffin. Completely oblivious to your ongoing little inner torment. Her big eyes flicker up to meet yours, brimming with glee. Brushing a crumb off her cheek, you force a little smile for her.

Like a dull sting under your skin, you feel how little teeth of guilt gnaw away at you, not only because it’s been almost impossible to offer her a genuine smile in the past two days since you stepped foot in this dammed place, but because you simply wish you could share the same excitement as she does, and perhaps…feel more positive about this whole situation. For her.

But all you’ve been able to feel is guilt.

An incessant amount of it. Guilt and fear. Slowly brewing up inside you like some sort of poison that has had you feeling a little sick to your stomach.

”You’re spiraling again.” Hoseok pulls you out of your absentminded state, studying you over the rim of his half finished iced americano.

You blink. You often tend to forget how well he’s capable of reading you. Though you suppose that’s a skill acquired with nearly twenty years of friendship, and an unavoidable consequence of growing up constantly together, practically like siblings.

Hoseok has been the only constant in your life for as long as you can remember, like a brother to you — conjoined at the hip as his mother always used to joke. It all began when you moved next door. With your parents always working late and often times far away from home, Hoseok's home slowly became your second one — the place you spent most of your childhood and adolescence and formed some of your fondest memories. A place where you were never alone.

You do suppose it’s no surprise the years and the unbreakable bond you’ve formed have given you exceptional abilities to know when something is off with just a simple glance. But it's never less surprising.

The corners of your mouth tug upwards into a tiny smile at his words, brows pinched in a pathetic attempt to hide your truth. “I am not.”

“You are. You’re thinking too much,” he stirs the ice in his drink with the straw, eyes flicking up to meet yours again. “Which if I may remind you, is one of your fatal flaws.”

You scoff, only slightly offended as you watch him take a slow sip. Pushing your sunglasses further up your head as you lean back. “Thinking too much is not my fatal flaw.”

He’s may very likely be right about that, but of course, you’d never actually admit it.

Hoseok snorts, clearly unconvinced. His voice just above a whisper when he murmurs, “Right. Sorry. It’s definitely lying.”

Before you can argue, he leans forward to accept some crumbs of muffin Jieun is so eagerly offering him. The sight tugs at something deep in your chest, watching his expression soften to mush as he thanks her with that brightest, tender smile he only ever uses for her before he brings his attention back to you.

“If it weren’t your fatal flaw, you’d actually be enjoying that overpriced coffee and oh—, maybe being reunited with your best friend again. I haven’t even seen you in like three months.” He shakes his head in utter disappointment, sitting back with a dramatic sigh.

“Hobi, I am so thrilled to be reunited with you, truly.” You roll your eyes ever so slightly and place a hand on your heart rather sarcastically as you say it, but deep down you hope he knows you’re only half joking. No one has done for you more than what hoseok has in the time you’ve known him.

You suppose all the change has got you in a rather sentimental state. But you bury it away. Hoseok deserves a nice time out with a friend for once too. He’s seen enough of your tears.

“Yeah?” he leans in, studying you with mock concern. Though not falling for it even a bit. "That's your thrilled face? You sure about that?” You almost laugh in response, but then, he shifts, looking more serious than just seconds ago. “You know,” he pauses, crossing his arms over his chest. “For someone who finally landed a nice new job and has everything working out, you don’t look all that thrilled to me, actually. That’s all.”

You press your lips together and glance down at your coffee, suddenly the truth a little too hard to face. You should be happy. He’s right. Because things really are starting to look up for you again. Everything you’ve spent the last few months wishing for has finally become a reality. And yet, you can’t shake the fact that there’s a deep buried sense of dread that seems to be getting in the way of that, a familiar fear that's been present for years, but only intensified since you stepped foot in Seoul again.

Hoseok follows your gaze, watching you carefully, then nudges your foot under the table gently. “Come on.” He murmurs softly, eyebrows raised gently. “What is it?”

You suppose your real fatal flaw is your emotions showing up as flashy neon subtitles over your head apparently, or the fact you are simply terrible at hiding them, because Hoseok doesn't budge. He sees right through your little facade — always has. And as much as you know he is a great listener and that he genuinely cares to hear it all, always ready to give you a helping hand in any way he possibly can, you just don’t want to sound ungrateful. Not when anyone else in your position would be feeling over the moon right now.

Besides, you’ve never liked burdening him, or anyone for that matter. Never wanted to add more weight to the heavy things he already carries himself. He deals with so much of that at work already. So many problems significantly worse than your own worries. So you simply shake your head, putting on a small smile once again in hopes to appease him.

“I’m alright, Hobi. It's just…strange. Being back here. Overwhelming, I guess,” you admit, though only to half of the truth. “It’s so calm on the island. I suppose I got used to it. Everything here is just so intense. But that's all.” You cross your arms on the table as you gaze out at the busy streets. Hoping you don't sound as pathetic as you feel. Though in truth, this whole things isn't just strange. It’s all actually fucking terrifying.

In many ways it seemed like nothing here had changed since the day you left four years ago. The cityscape is as bustling as you remember – a stark contrast to the quietude and stillness of Jeju, where you had been building your new life up until now. People in suits rush back and forth and push into each other with no care, everything is always shadowed by a maze of buildings that don't seem to have an end. Cars weave through traffic like they want to crash into each other, and neon signs and billboards still flicker blindingly even in the daytime.

The fact that everything remains the same, terrifies you. The rush, the stress, the chaos. That constant hustle and bustle that seems suffocating. It wasn't the reason why you left. but it was certainly a factor that made your life here something you wanted to escape from. It feels like stepping back into the life you thought you’d left behind for good. Like stepping onto a moving treadmill, when you no longer know how to run. Not sure if you’ll ever find your place here again.

Hobi hums in understanding, and the warmth in the familiarity of his smile helps lessen the knot that's been forming in your stomach all morning. And though you've only let out a tiny portion of what's on your mind, you already feel like you can breathe with more ease.

Sometimes, it’s not so bad that he can see right through you. Because you also tend to forget he’s the only one that truly gets you, understands you when even you struggle to understand yourself, and has never once been one to judge you, no matter how small or ridiculous it may be.

“Yeah, I get it. It can be overwhelming.” He nods slowly, letting the words settle. “But if I were you, I’d be damn proud of myself.” His expression is calm and his words full of sincerity as he speaks. “You did what you had to do, and now you’re doing it again. Making more big changes. Really tough decisions, and I know that’s not easy.” He pauses. “But you've always made it after all. This time won't be different. Besides, think about this, we’re close to each other now. I’ll be here for anything you guys need, you know that.”

Your heart softens at his comforting words, and the reassurance feels like it melts some of the tension off your shoulders. And for just a split second you feel that roar of confidence, thinking about everything you've accomplished, but it's not lasting, and deflates with the weight of your heavier thoughts.

You want to believe what he says — you really do. For your daughter's sake. Because this is finally your chance to start over and build something better. To give Jieun the life she deserves, something stable, a chance to thrive in a place full of new opportunities.

A fresh start.

After all, isn't that all you've ever been chasing?

You don’t want to allow your fears and the past to come in the way of that. But it's never so simple. At least, definitely not here — definitely not for you.

Because the truth is, being in Seoul again feels like roaming a haunted city. Tainted and plagued by shadows from the past, by who you used to be, and everything and everyone you left behind all those years ago when you ran and didn’t dare to look back. Being here now, you can’t shake the feeling — the apprehension and fear that everything you once left behind is lurking around the corner, ready to jump out and haunt you, making everything you've finally built up crumble to pieces once again. This place just gives you an indescribable feeling of…dread. Eeriness even. Enough for it to linger gut deep with a painful sense of discomfort that hasn’t eased since the day you arrived. As if you can never truly let your guard down.

But after all, it was an opportunity you couldn’t pass up, even if it meant returning to the city you swore you’d never step foot in again. The offer came at just the right moment, a lifeline after months of uncertainty and dead-ends. After losing your job, and endless nights crying yourself to sleep with the heavy burden of becoming a failure of a mother and not knowing how to make ends meet. You practically cried with joy the morning you finally got the call, and ignored the pit that formed in your stomach when you heard where it required you to move to. It had felt like you were about to reach the peak of a mountain, only to drop all the way back down to the bottom. But it was a steady paycheck, and a chance to finally give Jieun some stability. It wasn’t glamorous or grand — a position in a small marketing firm. But it was enough to rebuild. The breakthrough you so badly needed to start over and secure a future for your little girl.

How could you possibly turn it down?

That was your biggest and only goal in life.

There was nothing you wouldn’t do for her. So you knew in that very instant you had to take it. Even if it meant returning to the place that broke you beyond repair. So you packed up your life and now, here you are. Back where you never thought you’d be. So far from the tranquility of the home you had made for yourself in a secluded tiny seaside town four years ago. Where you were happy. Where you didn't live in constant fear.

“I know this is what I need right now,” you speak softly, more to yourself than anything. You reach out, gently brushing your fingers through Jieun's baby soft hair, watching as she focuses intently on her muffin, completely unaware of the heaviness of the conversation. “I just don’t want to mess anything up…the job, you know, our new life here. I want to get this right. I don’t want anything, getting in the way of that.” You swallow thickly, fingers tightening around the mug of coffee in front of you, and Hoseok knows exactly what you mean by that. You hesitate, letting out a quiet breath before speaking again. “I know there's so many opportunities for us here but…I was happy in Jeju. Jieun was happy.”

Hoseok nods, slow and understanding. “I know you were. A city like this takes some adapting to, you know that.” He reaches out and gives your arm a gentle squeeze, “but give it time. You’ll settle right back in.” He says warmly, reassuring. You return a tiny smile, more genuine this time.

“Seriously though. Change is good. New home, new job, meeting new people…maybe even someone special…” he adds.

You scoff, eyes widening, only half incredulous at how fast he swerved the topic there. So typical of him.

“Yeah no, thanks. You can stop it right there.” You shake your head.

“What?” Hobi leans back in his chair, crossing his arms as he waggles his eyebrows, a tiny smirk pulling at the corner of his lips, completely unbothered despite your clear opposition. “I'm just saying,” he adds in, raising his hands in mock innocence, though he feels like your glare could actually kill him. “You’re young. You’re no longer in that tiny ass town full of old drunk married cheating men. Everyone deserves a little fun. It wouldn't kill you to-”

“Hobi,” you sigh, cringing internally at the memories of disastrous dates you told him all about over the phone. You throw a pointed look in his direction, but Hoseok just chuckles. “I’m done with all that. Seriously.”

“Come on,” he presses.

“No. No way. I told you.” You interject, tone firm, not even allowing space for the idea. “I’m a single mother, Hobi. That’s been off the cards for years. I have different priorities now.” You straighten in your seat, making a point to scoop Jieun's hair back and out of her drink. These are your priorities now.

Hoseok raises a brow, watching you carefully, but there's no judgment in his expression now — just silent understanding. He leans back in his chair again, smile dying down, tapping his fingers absently against his iced americano before his gaze drifts over to your little girl. His expression softens, fondness flowing in his eyes.

“I know,” he says after a moment, his tone a tad more gentle. “But I’m just saying…you’re allowed to let yourself be happy again, you know. You deserve that.”

Something uncomfortable twists in your insides. Happy. What a simple word, but what a complex thing.

You lift your eyes to meet his, the sincerity in his gaze cutting right through. You could argue, explain that you don't agree, that romance is a door locked for good. Not only out of fear, but out of necessity. It’s no longer just about you. You don’t have the luxury of reckless choices or fleeting little flings like you did before.

There's simply to much buried history to let anyone new into your life.

And deep down, you don't believe you deserve it. But you don’t voice any of that. There's no need to explain. Hoseok knows your history better than anyone, the pain etched deep into you, the one you carry like a scar beneath your skin. He knows Jieun's father plays a big role in that, even though you don’t dare to mention him and haven’t in years. He knows his existence and every memory he’s involved in is something you merely refuse to acknowledge. And though Hoseok wants nothing more than for you to thrive, he knows better than to press on the matter.

Still, he hesitates before speaking quietly. “I’ve been here four years, and I’ve never seen him again.”

He says it gently, in hopes the information is comforting to you, to maybe put you at ease, but instead it feels like a small jab between your ribs. You stiffen, for just a second. You feel your heart begin to race a tiny bit faster. And you wonder when the mention of him will stop having this goddamn effect on you.

Hoseok notices, and regret quickly flickers across his face. He realizes he might have overstepped, treading on thin ice that he fears may slowly be cracking beneath him.

But it doesn't. You take a deep breath, and you simply nod. It’s okay. You know you can’t avoid it forever. Besides, who’s to say he even still lives here? The thought should be reassuring, bring you some sort of peace, be relieving. But it isn’t. Because the thought of ever seeing him again makes your palms sweat, and your chest a little tight.

“Yeah.” You say quietly. “You’re right. Who knows.”

You don't mention how many late nights you've stayed up, haunted with thoughts like if ever did make it out of here. If he ever made to the states and accomplished all those things he wanted. If he's perhaps settled down and started a family or if he's stuck right where he used to be, how he used to be. You don't mention how sometimes, you mind even attacks you with the thought of if he’s even still alive.

You don't dare mention any of it.

Hoseok exhales, rubbing the back of his neck. “I’m sorry. I just-” He pauses, voice lowering as he checks Jieun to make sure she's not listening, not that she would know or understand, but you appreciate that he does. “I know we’re not meant to talk about him–“

You push past it, giving a small dismissive shake of the head. Instead, you plaster on a small practiced smile, turning to glance down at the little girl beside you as well. It isn't something easy to avoid. But for the past four years, somehow, you’ve managed it.

“Anyway. I am happy,” you say, voice softer now, steering the conversation elsewhere. “I get all the love I need from my little lovebug right here, don’t I?”

The little lovebug in question remains completely unaware of the heaviness of the conversation. Instead, her wide eyes are fixated on something outside, her eyes big and small fingers suddenly clutching your sleeve.

“Mommy, look!” She gasps, tugging desperately for your attention, she calls you again, tearing you away from your conversation. “The birdy!”

You follow her gaze, a small black bird just on the other side of the glass, and the simplicity of her joy softens you, eases the heaviness for a second. It really doesn't take much to amuse a child, and you’re glad to see at least someone enjoying her time here so far. “I see, baby.”

You smile with her, that is until, just a moment later, you notice… the small bird is no longer pecking at crumbs on the pavement. It’s… acting rather strangely. Its head twitches sharply to the side, body jerking with twitchy erratic movements as it flaps it’s wings like crazy, then suddenly, it freezes, before twitchting again.

Your brows furrow, unable to take your eyes off it. What the hell? Something about it sends a strange chill through you, suddenly understanding what had Jieun so surprised.

“Oh, I think that poor bird might have gone a little coo coo.” Hoseok turns his head to take a look himself, and you both exchange a puzzled glance, to which Hobi just shrugs with a mildly disgusted expression.

“What, you know I hate birds.” he whispers, shrugging like someone just walked over his grave, and you swat his arm and shush him, suppressing a laugh. You wouldn't want your sweet animal loving daughter hearing that.

“Isn't that so weird. I’ve never seen one do that before.” You say, and hoseok tilts his head, staring at it with a mildly grossed out frown. “Probably has some kind of parasite or something. Not sure.”

“It’s gonna die?” she looks up at hobi, her little face full of worry. You wrap your arms around her, pulling her in closer.

“Not necessarily, bub. I’m sure it’ll be okay,” Hobi answers, trying to be tactful, however, Jieun doesn’t look convinced, but she nods sadly and resumes eating spoonfuls of her hot chocolate that's long gone cold.

“Yeah, it’ll be fine baby.” You kiss the top of her head, as you glance out the window once again, only to see it’s no longer there.

“So odd.” You shake your head, taking another sip of your coffee, and Hoseok nods and lets out a low hum, taking another sip himself.

“So, what’s the plan for the rest of the day? Are you actually gonna start unpacking, or are you going to let those suitcases rot in your living room for another week?” He taunts.

You chuckle. “I’ll unpack eventually. This little girl and I have a long list of errands left to do today.”

“Uh-huh.” He gives you an unconvinced look, then looks at Jieun with a dramatic pout, cooing. “My poor little monkey. Prisoner to moms to do list. I remember that feeling.”

She giggles, and you speak up. “Shhh, she loves errands with mommy, don't you-”

Suddenly, a loud crash sound from the back of the café, startling you all.

The sharp clatter of metal rings out and you hear a young worker gasp, emerging hastily from behind the counter as the previous muffle of conversation begins to die down. Heads immediately start turning towards the scene unfolding before them.

“What the hell?” you murmur as you hastily turn around yourself, pulse spiked from the jump.

Near the back of the cafe, a chair is knocked to the ground, a mans body hunched over on the floor, shaking and convulsing with an unnatural force that seems to take over him completely. The man sitting beside him instantly scrambles to the floor next to him, shaking his shoulders in a failed attempt to break him out of whatever is happening as he calls out for help in a trembling voice, panicked.

“Oh my god, Hobi-” You gasp and your stomach twists as you take in what is occurring, grip instinctively tightening around your daughter's hand, turning her away from the scene. One of the members of staff pulls out her phone, announcing that she will call an ambulance right away, the man on the floor now surrounded by two other workers that instantly made their way over to him.

Hoseok takes just a few seconds to register what’s going on. “Shit.” He mutters, “A seizure.”

Instantly, he’s up on his feet, leaving you and Jieun behind and rushes over to help, but before he can reach the man on the floor, a young worker steps in front of him, his hands raised.

“An ambulance is on the way!” he blurts out, eyes darting between the unconscious man and the crowd gathering around him, Hoseok noticing his eyes full of panic. “Please, just give him space.”

“It's alright. I’m a nurse,” Hoseok urges, trying to step around him. “Please, let me-”

This time, there’s no resistance — only relief in the young man's panicked eyes as he steps aside, allowing Hoseok through to where the man is convulsing on the floor.

Jesus christ. On his one day off. He thinks internally.

Without hesitation, Hoseok drops to one knee. “Don’t hold him down,” he instructs the mans friend beside him as he proceeds to unbutton the first few buttons of the man's shirt to facilitate his breathing. He presses his fingers to his wrist as best as he can, taking a pulse. He attempts to roll him on his side, but he seizes with too much force, limbs jerking far too erratically for him to do so.

“Has he ever had seizures before? Is he epileptic?” Hoseok asks without tearing his eyes away from the man.

The man's friend just shakes his head. “No…no- he was fine right before.”

“Ambulance is just two minutes away,” the barista yells, phone still pressed to her ear. Hoseok nods but keeps his focus on the young man. Face contorted in concertation as he's checking his pulse once again before tilting his head to ensure he’s breathing properly.

You sit speechless few tables away, watching the scene unfold, your heart erratic in your chest. But feeling so much relief Hoseok was here. Jieun's small hand holds yours tightly, grip strong. She shifts in her seat, trying to peek over the booth to the commotion, but you gently pull her in beside you. Pulling her close, you brush a soothing hand over her hair.

“It’s okay, baby,” your whisper. “That man wasn’t feeling very well. But uncle hobi is helping him. Isn’t that so good? He’s really good at helping people remember. It's okay.”

Jien nods slowly, though her brows are still drawn together in concern. She doesn’t fully understand, but she doesn’t doubt your word, or her uncle's abilities.

Across the large space, Hoseok presses his lips into a thin line, his eyes watching carefully as the man's convulsions finally begin to slow, the violent jerking finally seeming to ease up. But just as the worst seems to have passed…Hoseok stiffens.

There’s a concerning, deep purplish hue creeping up the man’s neckline, peeking through the gap of his unbuttoned white shirt. Dark veins snaking against his pale skin, spreading like ink through thin cracks. Hoseok swallows hard, alarm bells ringing at the back of his mind.

That…that doesn’t look right. His medical knowledge kicks in, a thousand possibilities racing through his mind, digging for the most fitting answer. Is it cyanosis? an undiagnosed vascular disease? Possibly an infected wound? blunt trauma?

His mind dashing for answers in an instant, but before he can take a better look and unbutton his shirt completely, after what feels like a lifetime, the piercing wail of sirens cuts right through his thoughts, and just moments after, paramedics burst into the café, pushing past the gathered crowd near the Hoseok and the patient on the floor. Hoseok quickly regains focus, stepping back to allow them to take over.

“He had a seizure. Approximately a minute long. His breathing is stable but—“ He hesitates for a second, then presses on, giving them a brief diagnosis and rundown. “I think he may have another underlying condition. Possible hypoxia.”

The paramedic beside him nods, wasting no time as they swiftly load him onto a stretcher. He stands back, his jaw tight, fingertips tingling with the urge to do more, watching as they wheel him out through the entrance. The murmurs of the coffee shop begin to start up again, confused and concerned looks turning left and right, but Hoseok can’t shake all the questions in his mind.

He just hopes the guy turns out to be okay. The same way it goes with every patient he sees. You have to do your part and let go. That's how it works. but this time, he's left with a weird feeling bubbling inside.

After a few minutes, Hoseok turns back to your table. The moment his eyes meet yours, you’re already standing and asking, “God, is everything okay? He’s okay, right?”

“It’s alright,” Hoseok reassures you, though his tone is softer than usual. “They've got it under control.”

His gaze flickers toward Jieun, who’s still clinging to you, her small face twisted in worry as she glances between the two of you. She tugs your sleeve, her voice barely above a whisper. “Mommy…what happened to the man?”

“The ambulance people will take care of him and take him to the hospital so they can help him.” You say gently. She blinks up at you, then glances toward Hoseok, as if waiting for confirmation.

Hoseok lips form a small smile, crouching slightly to be at her eye level. “Your mom is right,” he says carefully, patting her head. “Sometimes when people don’t feel well they need a little help. That’s what doctors and nurses are for Jieun. It’s okay.”

Jieun watches him for a moment, and gives him a slow understanding nod. He then straightens and exhales, running a hand through his hair. “Let’s get out of here,” he murmurs, his gaze flicking back toward the road in front of the entrance where the ambulance is now setting off.

You nod, now feeling a weight of unease in the crowded space. It would probably be best to give them space to handle the situation, and to get some fresh air after that. So you retrieve Jieun's little pink puffer vest from off hobis chair and gently help her arms into, zipping it up snuggly to keep her warm from the afternoon chill, before taking her hand in yours.

As the three of you finally step outside, you're grateful for the crisp autumn air that lifts some of the heaviness off you. God, that was stressful. The distant sounds of the city hum around you, and life moves as if nothing happened.

“God, I hope that guy is okay.” You say quietly only for Hoseok to hear, taking your daughter's hand as you let out a slow breath. “First that weird bird and then that poor guy.”

Hoseok hums in agreement and gives a small reassuring nod, pushing his concerns aside. But you know how hard it is for him to switch off. How even when the emergency is over, his mind replays it again and again, analysing— wondering if he could have done more, if he could’ve done better. Even when he deals with stuff like this everyday, it’s never been easy.

“Jesus Christ. What's that saying, bad things always come in two’s? Three’s? ” He chuckles, letting out a huff. “I told you, there’s never an uneventful day out here.” Hobi shakes his head, forcing a smile to lift the mood. But his body still buzzes with tension. Then, in one swift movement, he scoops Jieun up, swinging her into his arms. “Now, time for ice cream?”

Jieun giggles loudly, kicking her feet excitedly at his words, all her earlier worries forgotten. “Yes!”

“Hobi, she just had a hot chocolate. Do you even have space for ice cream, Jieun?” You say, trying to sound stern, but the sight of them giggling together pulls a real smile out of you. And something inside already tells you you’re going to give in.

“She’s with uncle hobi now, there’s no rules.” He sing songs, walking ahead of you with your daughter in arms, all smiles as she squeals at his gentle tickling. The spitting image of joy if you ever saw it.

And for just a moment, you try to push away the nagging feeling that’s been pressing at the back of your mind.

Because maybe, just maybe, this time, everything will be just fine after all.

Jungkook steadies his hand, a quiet hiss of pain getting lost in the low thrumming of the tattoo gun that fills the quiet studio, lulling him into that comforting sense of calm he knows so well. It’s a fairly big piece, he’s been here hunched over for hours now, that familiar dull ache creeping up his back, but he barely registers it. Because all that matters is the art taking form beneath his touch.

Here, in these moments, it's when the feels most himself. Distracted, at peace, In control. Something he’s never found that easy outside of these four walls.

Every stroke, every line falls exactly where he intends it to. In a way, the rest of the world seems to fade away — no worries, just ink and skin, art coming to life. And it grants him a satisfaction nothing else can quite offer. And if there’s one thing Jungkook prides himself on, it’s his work and dedication. He built this place with steady hands and relentless effort, and he knows damn well he’s good at what he does. Confidence hasn't always been second nature to him, but time and experience have definitely sharpened him.

He leans back slightly to take in the work before him, his disheveled strands of dark hair falling over his eyes as he uses a paper towel to wipe up some excess ink from the client's forearm before glancing up. “How are we holding up?”

The young guy shifts in the chair, letting out a breathy chuckle. “Let’s just say I felt that last bit there.”

Jungkook nods, noting the slight sheen of sweat on the guy's forehead. He’s just glad he’s not a squirmer. That shit makes his job so much harder than it needs to be.

His own body is the canvas of plenty tattoos. All colours, shapes and sizes. He's more than numb to the pain now. But he gets it.

“You’re doing really well. I won’t torture you much longer. We’re almost done with the worst part.” Pressing the pedal again, he feels the familiar vibration travel up his arm, he tongues with his lip piercing, a habit that signals his concentration. His hair is dusting over his eyes as he continues with the last bits of shading and does the final touch ups of all the smaller details. Another forty five minutes pass, broken by lighthearted conversation here and there. Though Jungkook never used to be one for making conversation before, he has long mastered the art of letting his mouth wander while his hands and precision remain steady and focused.

“Alright, and we’re done,” he wipes down the fresh ink one last time before setting the tattoo gun aside, letting out a silent exhale as he wheels back, peeling off his black gloves to grab the aftercare instruction sheet, ready to spew his usual little lecture he knows most people don’t even pay much attention to.

“Sit up slowly.” Jungkook instructs.

When the guy finally stands, he marvels at his tattoo in the mirror. Jungkook feels a flicker of pride swell in his chest. No matter how many times he does this, seeing the completed, polished work and his client's expressions of amazement never gets old. “Looks sick man. Better than I imagined.” He beams, twisting his arm under the light, his smile spreading all across his face.

“Good choice with the design.” Jungkook replies with a faint smile tugging at his lips. He then places the protective film, gives him a quick rundown of the aftercare and hands him the sheet. “Take care of it. Follow the aftercare instructions and it’ll heal nicely. And you know, any issues just come by or give me a call and I’ll check it out.”

“Will do. Thanks man, it’s perfect.”

As the last client of the day slips out with a final wave and he hears the bell over at the entrance ding, Jungkook finally feels the exhaustion set in — the kind that only comes after hours of steady concentrated work. Fuck, he really does need to work on his posture. He stretches his back, then cracks his knuckles, stretching his toned, inked arms over his head. But despite the tiredness, he feels no rush no rush to get back to his empty apartment.

He never does.

Instead, he takes his time wiping down his station, tidying all his clutter and ink in the methodical and organized way only he understands — something Yoongi always grumbles about when borrowing his space. But this is his sanctuary. He makes the rules. And yoongi may complain, but he accepts it.

When he's done cleaning up, Jungkook emerges into the entrance area of the studio, rubbing the back of his neck and ruffling his hair at the nape.

Yoongi stretches in his chair behind the front counter, arms lifting above his head as he lets out as wide yawn, smacking his lips as his eyes land on the younger. “Christ, I thought you were dead in there,” he says deadpan, watching as Jungkook attempts to roll out the tension coiled in his shoulders, stifling a yawn himself. “Or are you? I genuinely can't tell.”

“Very funny.” Jungkook mutters, slumping onto the leather couch with an over dramatic sigh, throwing the back of his arm over his eyes as he lets his body sink into the plush cushion. It’s moments like this he’s really fucking glad they invested in a good sofa. He wants it to swallow him.

“Sure you can survive the schedule tomorrow? We’re fucking packed.” He says.

Jungkook’s brows knit together as his eyes dart over to Yoongi, eyeing the printed schedule in front of him as he rubs his jaw. “What? You think I can't handle it?”

Yoongi shakes his head, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. He coughs into his fist, a rough dry sound that echoes through the quietness of the now empty studio. “I know you think you’re some kind of machine,” he gives the younger a pointed look, “but let me just remind you that you are, in fact, very much not.”

Jungkook's lips quirk. “Woah, woah. I’ll be fine. Unlike someone who sounds like they've caught the plague.” Lifting his arms from his eyes just enough to peer at Yoongi, he swings his arm as if to push him away. “Stay away from me with that. I can’t afford a day off anytime soon.”

Yoongi scoffs, waving a dismissive hand as he coughs into his fist again. “Relax, it's just the dust. Or if you’re lucky enough I've caught that shit going around. Won't be on your case anymore for at least two weeks. That's if I survive.”

The sound is muffled by his arm as Jungkook lets out a tired chuckle, but his eyes remain closed. “Now you’re just trying to get out of work tomorrow, hyung. I know your little tricks.”

“If anyone should be trying to get our work, it should be you. Admit your running on fumes.” Yoongi drops the piece of paper to the desk and crosses his arms, looking right across to Jungkook, his eyes squinting lightly.

Jungkook feels his heavy gaze, but he's not in the mood to face one of Yoongis lectures right now. He can’t exactly argue that. Because he knows Yoongi is not entirely wrong.

He's working six days a week, morning till night, barely stopping to take a breath. Hell, it would've been the entire seven days of the week if Yoongi hadn’t raised hell the day he suggested it. Jungkook had tried to reason with him, insisting that Yoongi would still get his days off as usual, that he’d open up the studio alone on weekends and get everything sorted for the week ahead. But it was never about that, and he knew it.

Jungkook has always had a knack for picking up self-destructive tendencies. A slow brewing kind of self destruction, pushing himself way past his limits, working himself down to the bone until he can barely function. And Yoongi simply wasn't going to stand back and watch it happen all over again right in front of his eyes.

Most days, he only eats because it’s Yoongi who shoves food his way, whether he wants it or not. Prepping meals and stashing them away in their mini fridge in the back room where Jungkook can find them, labeled with a little note in his unmistakable messy handwriting that reads “eat.”

Because behind his serious facade, Yoongi had always tried his best to care for him.

From countless nights of dragging his black out drunk body home back in college, and many times after college as well. To picking him up from the streets at 4 am after he got into a nasty fight, bruised and bleeding and sobbing his heart out alone on an empty sidewalk. Yoongi didn’t question it back then, didn't hesitate. He never does. He just helped quietly with no second thought, allowing him to sit with his silent sobs on the car ride home. He had always been there, offering him a home when he had nowhere else to go, offering everything he had if it helped Jungkook from drowning.

It was Yoongi that had seen the potential in him and had patiently guided him to finally see it for himself, helping him build this studio from nothing — helping him build every piece of furniture, putting up every shelf, painting every wall, making sure Jungkook finally had something to call his.

And now, despite all the hardships, he’s come further than they both could have imagined.

Yet deep down, Yoongi knows no amount of help can stop Jungkook from being who he is, not when he has it so deeply rooted in himself to self sabotage in every way he possibly can. It's simply how he’s wired. Yoongi has long accepted that some things are simply beyond his reach, and that Jungkook won’t ever fully change. And he may never admit it out loud, but somewhere in his heart, as the eldest, he’s always felt an unspoken weight of responsibility for Jungkook. That's why he tries relentlessly to guide him towards better choices.

Even though Jungkook has matured and come a long way from his troubled past and the reckless kid he used to be, he’s far from eradicating his bad habits entirely. He knows he’s working himself down to the bone. He knows it's not healthy. Unrealistic for him to sustain in the long run. But he doesn’t like himself when he’s unoccupied.

He doesn't like the quiet.

Because when there’s silence, there’s space for his mind to make noise.

So that’s what he does. He works, works until he can exhaust himself to the point of passing out, too drained to even feel. It means no thoughts can haunt him when his head hits the pillow. And he’s okay with that.

Besides, he loves his job. That's a fact. The only thing he’s passionate about. All he’s ever found himself to be good at. He doesn’t need anything or anyone else.

Or at least, that’s what he tells himself.

“Fumes are still fuel,” Jungkook shoots back. He reaches behind his head to grab an old vintage manga off the small side table, flipping through the pages without really reading.

Yoongi studies him for a moment, his sharp gaze softening just a fraction. He shifts in his seat, resting his elbows on the counter, zeroing in on him as if he were ready to throw out a serious scolding, like he did back when he was a kid. But his next words are nothing but gentle. “You know, if you wanna keep up with that schedule, you’re gonna need sleep. I can close up if you wanna head out first.”

Jungkooks expression falters — just a flicker. But he covers it with an exaggerated groan. It does get on his nerves ever so slightly, just slightly. What is it with everyone always underestimating him? Treating him like he's not capable of making his own decisions. But his tongue toys with his lip ring as he continues flicking through the pages, feigning nonchalance. “I’m good. I wanna sketch out a few new designs first. Got some ideas ratting around.”

Yoongi squints at him, clearly unconvinced. “You do know that old couch isn't a substitute for a bed, right? and you could just…do that at home.”

Jungkook tosses the comic aside as he shrugs, already bored of the conversation, his inked fingers drumming relentlessly against the worn red leather. “I focus better here.” Is his simple answer, but before Yoongi can speak, a loud siren cuts through their conversation, blaring jarringly as it flashes by across the street. Almost instantly another follows, and then another.

Instinctively, both of their heads turn towards the window, though it only gives view to a small glimpse of the larger front street, most of their view blocked by the building across from them, all they can see is the bright lights flashing as they rush past.

“The hell’s that about,” Yoongi mutters, straightening in his chair.

Jungkook furrows his brows, pushing himself up on his elbows to get a better look outside. But from what he can see, everything seems normal enough — cars passing by, people going about their night and a few students heading home from late study sessions. Nothing in particular out of the ordinary.

The studio is located on a fairly quiet smaller side street, on the outskirts of the city, just a little further from the booming heart of Seoul. It’s never as busy or chaotic here, much quieter.

“Accident, maybe?” Jungkook guesses, a tired breath slipping past his lips. It’s still Seoul after all. When is it ever completely quiet?

Yoongi hums in agreement, but as if on cue, another set of sirens blares through the streets, overlapping with others as the noise grows, this time it’s police cars too, wailing violently and urgently before fading into the distance as they speed away. Jungkook glances at Yoongi, who meets his gaze with an equally puzzled expression.

“Must be pretty bad.” Jungkook says.

Yoongi just pulls out his phone to check the time and sighs. “Well, whatever it is, I'm not sticking around to find out.” He pushes himself to his feet, patting his back pocket to pull out his dented pack of cigarettes before reaching for his jacket draped over the back of the chair.

A slight sense of uneasiness crawls up Jungkook's spine. That was about four ambulances and three police cars if not more. That’s….that’s a lot. But he soon brushes it off. “I’ll check the news later.” He mumbles, letting his heavy body drop back against the soft cushion, with no energy or intention to move.

Yoongi tugs his jacket on, tossing him a small glance. “Well, if you’re gonna stay here, at least don’t fall asleep on that damn couch again. You drool, and it’s gross.”

Jungkook chuckles, though it's half hearted. “I won’t ruin your sacred couch, hyung. Don't you worry.”

“Good.” Yoongi deadpans, heading toward the door. He flips the neon sign to closed before turning back to Jungkook once more, his tired features softening just a touch. “Don't stay too late. Tomorrow is fucking packed and you’ll regret it when youre half dead in the morning. And don’t forget about that girl you booked in at 9.”

He presses his eyes shut for a moment, letting out a breath. The girl needed some touch ups to her tattoo but had a busy schedule and no time to visit any other day or at ay other time. So Jungkook did the favour, and offered to book her in before opening time. But fuck. He really does need to stop bending his schedule for people.

He knows he’s going to regret it.

Jungkook just waves a dismissive hand, already getting comfy on the couch. “Yeah, yeah. I’ll leave soon.”

Yoongi doesn't believe him, but he doesn't argue, just pulls out a cigarette from the pack and raises his hands in surrender before he pulls open the door. “Alright. See you tomorrow.”

Jungkook hums in acknowledgement. “Rest up, Hyung.”

The studio fades to dead silence once the door closes. Though sirens still echo faintly in the background.

Stretched out on the couch, Jungkook stares at the ceiling a little longer than necessary. His limbs feel heavy, exhaustion pressing down on him heavily. He wants to work on those sketches, he wants to push his limits a little further. But his body seems to know what's best for him. And within minutes, he’s passed out.

When Jungkook’s eyes crack open, it’s to the gentle sound of rain pattering against the windows. But it’s not rain the noise that woke him. Distant voices shout over one another, and the erratic wailing of car alarms and sirens blast in a near distance, sounding like he’s still stuck between consciousness and a dream. Jungkook blinks, then suddenly, screeching tires follow into a loud crash, something heavy and metal hitting the pavement. His heart spikes, and his body jerks up instantly before his mind can register what the hell is going on. The sudden movement makes him lightheaded, blinking as he tries to shake the disorientation fogging his mind.

Shit. How long had he been out?

He curses under his breath, his head throbbing. Did someone just fucking crash their car outside? In his dazed state his fingers fumble for his phone in the front pocket of his jeans. He squints, the bright screen glaring back at him painfully in the darkness of the studio.

11:48 PM.

The first thought that comes to mind is drunk people causing a ruckus. It certainly wouldn't be unusual for Friday night. But then… he stops to listen. Are they breaking in? then his mind steers more towards the possibility of some petty street fight, or some idiots causing trouble. It’s the only conclusion his sleepy can come to.

But then, he hears it.

Raw, panicked, screams erupting from the streets outside. It sounds close. Really close.

What the fuck?

Jungkook feels a sickening pit form in his stomach.

Because that's definitely not the drunken shouts of a fight, not the sound of some petty fight or a car accident. It’s the kind of scream that crawls under your skin. And Jungkook knows the sounds of panic when he hears it. He feels his heart beating in his chest now, fast and strong. Something isn’t right. Before his mind can think further, he pushes off the couch and yanks his leather jacket from the armrest, pulling it on in a swift motion, feeling a little dizzy as the room slowly begins to spin from getting up so fast.

Behind the front counter he crouches, reaching for his motorcycle helmet. But his grip isn't steady, his palms suddenly feel a bit sweaty. The air in the room slightly suffocating.

His mind scrambles as he finally strides for the door, all he knows something is telling him he needs to get out. He’s ready to leave and check on what's happening outside, but just as his fingers brush the cold metal door handle—

A loud bang crashes into the large front window of the studio.

The impact rattles the entire front window, the glass shuddering violently as something smacks right into it with bone crushing force, causing large cracks to expand from the center like a spiderweb, blooming outwards across the glass. The helmet drops to the ground with a loud thud and Jungkook stumbles back in the darknesses, almost crashing back into the front counter as his breath gets stuck in his throat.

Jungkook freezes. His entire body completely paralyzed as he watches a thick, dark gush of red begin to trail down the ruins of the window. His eyes slowly follow it upwards and then…then he sees it.

A face, wedged between the shards of glass.

Jungkook sees the face of a man...except, it can't be. The skin is unnaturally pale, sickly white, dark veins bulging beneath the surface, tiny pieces of glass wedged everywhere into its flesh. Blood coats its entire mouth, dripping to the floor beneath — but it's the eyes… They send a shot of terror right down Jungkook's spine.

They’re clouded and gray, almost white and eerily vacant, yet somehow, they’re locked right onto him.

Jungkook feels like he can’t take a breath, his chest tight as his eyes grow with complete shock and confusion.

Then, it moves.

Its head twitches in a slow agonized form before it seems to fully register Jungkook's figure standing right across. It cocks his head towards him completely with a grotesque sound of craking and lunges forward, slamming its hands against the glass with inhuman strength. Giving it all his power to break inside. It lets out another groan, a guttural broken sound as it reveals a row of blood stained teeth, the deep red liquid dripping from its mouth.

Jungkook swallows hard. If he moves will it move too? Will it...chase him? He feels like no oxygen is reaching his lungs, or his brain, his mind struggling to even process what he is seeing. That…that can't be real. It can’t be human. All he can do is watch as his heartbeat pounds like a hammer in his chest, louder than the sirens and screams growing outside, louder than the animalistic banging against the window.

That…thing is trying to kill him. It’s going to kill him.

It doesn’t stop. It claws at the glass, smearing the blood, desperate, mindless — growing more violent as it seems to realise its stuck. But the glass creaks more with each hit, trembling under the pressure of each movement, and Jungkook realizes it might not hold up much longer. He has no time.

Move.

He has to move.

Like a spring snapping, his body finally kicks into action. He stumbles backwards, feeling glass beneath his shoes as he tries to hold in a breath, his eyes fixed on the creature as he tries to back away with steady steps. After a beat, he sprints towards the back of the studio, running as his body pushes through the beaded curtain into the back room.

His hands fumble frantically in his pocket — keys, keys, keys — but his hands are trembling too much to grip them. Fuck.

Jungkooks mind races with a thousand questions colliding all at once. But none of them make sense. None of them are even remotely rational.

That thing. It wasn’t human. Then what the hell was it?

Another jarring bang echoes in the studio, followed by a loud screech. But Jungkook doesn’t look up. He doesn’t have time. His only thought is to get out of here. Fast. He needs to get away from whatever the fuck that is. He needs to get to his motorcycle. He needs to get the police.

His fingers finally curl around cold metal. The keys. With a sharp inhale, he yanks opens the heavy back door leading into the tiny side alley and slams it shut behind him as he rushes out.

It’s dim, lit only by a flickering street lamp near the end, casting eerie shadows across the brick walls. The air is cool and damp, the smell of rain fresh on the damp asphalt and the sound of sirens and shouting voices in the distance become even clearer than before. But Jungkook can't see the one thing he’s looking for. His gaze darts around frantically and he feels a dreadful realization claw at his throat.

His motorcycle is gone. The spot where it’s always parked is empty.

Jungkook panics, his hands coming to his hair. Fuck, fuck, fuck. As he looks around helplessly, his breath only grows more erratic. He finds no other option but to run, so he runs to the end of the alleyway, running right towards the screams and tumult, and when he reaches the end, the scene unfolding before him almost kicks him to his feet.

The once quiet street had turned into a horrifying scene. People mindlessly running away from something. But what his eyes land on almost immediately is on a young woman in the middle of street, clutching her neck with both hands, her body swaying as she chokes out for help before she drops to her knees, her body shaking. Jungkook watches in horror as someone else runs right past her, coming from the same direction, white button up shirt soaked in something dark as his features display a kind of terror he’d never witnessed before. Across the street, an older man is pulling down the storefront gates as he locks himself inside, letting two kids in high school uniforms scream and kick as they beg to be let in, screaming and crying.

“What the fuck...” the words escape involuntarily in a quiet mumble to himself, his hands coming to his head.

Jungkook blinks repeatedly, completely aghast. But he doesn’t think— just moves, bolting down the street. His thick leather boots slam against the wet pavements as he runs, his dark hair blows in the air, his skin covered in a layer of sweat as he weaves past a fallen trash can and then a body, his breath ragged as he tries not to slip on the broken glass. The rush of adrenaline coursing through his veins too strong to even feel his body protesting.

Rounding a corner, he nearly collides into another person, but his hands instinctively come up to push them away, almost knocking them to the ground. He doesn’t have a space in his mind to think about it or time to dwell on it. His body acting on autopilot. The more he runs, the more people seem to be running in the opposite direction. Away from something. His legs burn as he sprints faster, but coming off onto the main street of Jongno, he comes to a halt as he takes in the state of the streets, pupils blown as something terrible dawns on his expression.

The city is in shambles.

Everything.

Chaos.

Cars sit abandoned in the middle of the road, their doors flung open, some have crashed into street lamps and traffic signs, into each other at intersections, even buildings, the smoke clouding up into the dark sky. Blending with the red and blue of wailing sirens. People are everywhere. Hundreds of people are running in all different directions — some screaming, some covered in blood, some sobbing and some seemingly unmoving on the ground. Pushing and tripping against each other, running, but most don’t even know what they’re running from, simply following the crowd.

How many more of those rabid people were there? How far had this spread?

He wants so badly to be wrong, but something deep inside him tells him this is something big.

He stills for an instant, trying to orientate himself. He scans the street hurriedly for the best route to avoid getting stuck in a crush, to avoid more of those things…but all he sees is the panicked chaos spreading by the second.

Jungkook feels like he’s outside of his body, like this is a dream, a nightmare he’ll wake up from any second now. He closed his eyes for a second and inwardly prays for it to be just a bad dream. But the air is thick with the acrid scent of smoke and blood, and the pounding in his chest is too real. The world around him still screams, set aflame.

This can’t be real.

This…this can’t be happening.

Just a few meters away from him two figures wrestle on the ground — except one of them isn’t fighting back anymore, and the other is hunched over them, their head buried in the victim’s throat. Jungkook staggers back, his stomach lurching at the gut wrenching sounds of someone being mauled alive, bile burning the back of his throat when he watches infected pulls back, large chunks of flesh dangling from its bloody mouth, dripping crimson.

The truth slams into him, but his mind is till fighting to accept it.

People are killing people. Eating people. Except…they're not people. They’re monsters.

Jungkook scans the crowd for an escape route, desperate. After a moment, he catches sight of the least crowded street, it's right on the way to his place. He takes a sharp breath and runs, runs non stop down a dozen blocks. But as he navigates the frantic roads, he spots something as he runs past a small street. Stopping him in his tracks. He notices a tiny figure huddled up alone at the beginning of an alleyway, wearing bright pink, shoulders trembling and hands pressed over her ears as she sobs violently.

A child, no older than three or four if Jungkook had to guess. He halts, heart pounding as he registers her small frightened face, streaked with tears.

He should keep running, he knows he should. His body is urging him to just keep moving, his insides shaking with adrenaline. That’s not his responsibility. He hasn’t stopped for anyone. But the burning images of what he’s just witnessed flash fresh in his mind. And something deeper roots him in place. Something inside him twists, snaps almost, an unfamiliar instinct that overrides his own confusion and fear.

Ah, fuck it.

Before his mind can catch up with what he’s doing, he rushes into the alley, approaching the child cautiously with slow steps as he gets closer. He crouches down to her level, looking over his shoulder nervously. “Hey, hey, hey, it’s okay,” his voice is gentle but hurried as he searches her face. “Where are your parents? Are you lost?”

The small girl just looks up at him with large, wet eyes and a trembling pout, her hands balled into tiny fists. She doesn’t answer, just stares, whimpering and hiccuping softly, like she’s been warned to not talk to strangers — especially not ones clothed head to toe in black, covered in tattoos and piercings like himself. He glances around, hoping to see someone rushing towards them, any sign of this child's parents so he can just hand her over and run, but there’s nothing, just the crowd at the end of the alley pushing past in frantic waves and yelling, no one stopping to even look in their direction.

He has to do something.

“Do you…where did you see your parents last-” a loud metal bang echoes in the distance, making Jungkook and the child flinch, a heavy breath escaping him. Fuck, his mind races as he realizes she’s truly alone. The girl just sobs more and he curses under his breath, eyes pressed shut as his mind scrambles for what to do.

He can’t just leave her alone in whatever the hell this is. But what the hell is he supposed to do?

“Uh, alright,” he coughs, throat dry, and speaks softly but hurriedly, trying to mask his unease as he reaches out his hand. “Come with me. It’s not safe here. I’ll… I'll help you find your parents.”

He’ll take her home, get her out of danger and call the police. That’s what he should do.

It’s the right thing to do.

Okay.

He hopes she knows he’s only trying to help. God, his pulse races every second he’s standing here still. They need to move. Now. She just stares at him, uncertain, then slowly reaches out with her tiny fingers, clasping his much larger hand with a surprising grip. She must see past his intimidating exterior, or be so terrified that she’ll take up any offer of being reunited with her parents, either way, her innocence makes Jungkook's heart sting a little. He can't just leave a child out here, he has to help her before something terrible happens to her or she falls into the wrong hands. He doesn't know what the hell to do, all he knows is they have to run, run right now and get away from this, and-

Suddenly, a piercing, desperate voice breaks through the havoc of noise, loud enough to catch Jungkook's attention.

“Jieun!”

The sound makes his entire body lock up, his heart jumping in his chest as he turns toward the voice.

Running towards him, just feet away, eyes filled with worry and tears, he sees you.

Jungkook feels the blood drain from his face.

For a split moment, the world seems to fall silent. The noise, the screams and chaos, the sirens — all of it blurs into a distant hum in the back of his mind. He feels like the air is knocked straight from his lungs as he slowly takes in your face, a slightly more matured version of a face he once knew every inch of, a face he’d buried away along with every memory he’d tried so hard everyday to annihilate ever since you disappeared from his life. A face he could never forget, not even after four painful years.

It can’t be.

No, no, no-

But it’s real, because there you are. Lunging forward and arms out reaching for the little girl beside him with thick tears of relief flooding from your eyes. The child lets go of Jungkook's hand instantly and her tiny feet pat across the concrete as she launches herself into your embrace, leaving him behind to watch, frozen and stone cold like a statue.

“Mommy!” She cries.

Jungkook feels his stomach drop. He thinks he's going to throw up.

He must’ve heard that incorrectly.

Mommy? That child is…

He feels like he can’t move, blood cold as he watches you crumble to your knees, gathering the little girl into your arms with a grip that looks suffocating, as if she might disappear into thin air again. Your whole frame trembles as you hold her close, relief pouring from you in loud, choked sobs, your fingers getting tangled in her wet hair as you comb though it desperately.

That’s.. your child?

“Jieun, oh my god, baby. You’re here, you’re okay,” your voice cracks with all the pain your body just underwent, whispering against her temple. “Are you hurt? You’re not hurt are you, baby?”

The last thing you remember is being in the convenience store when the chaos began. When you walked out you had no choice but to run into the crowd. How Jieun was holding your hand and in the blink of an eye, her hand slipped from yours. You turned back, screaming her name, but she was gone, just another small figure lost in the stampede of a city falling apart.

By the time you fought your way out of the crowd, Jieun was nowhere in sight. Your heart is still hammering loudly between your ribs, mind stuck on the past horrifying minutes since she disappeared from your side.

But as you finally look up… all your relief shifts, eyes darkening with shocking realisation that mirrors the expression in the man standing just feet away when you. Heart hammering in your chest as if it recognized him before your eyes do.

You blink once, twice to make sure your eyes aren’t deceiving you. Completely distraught.

If Jungkook thought he was stuck in a bad dream before, he’s certain now this is all a cruel, sick and twisted nightmare. He feels his stomach churn. The weight of clashing emotions and utter disbelief thrown over him. So many questions he can’t yet voice crashing into him like a bucket of ice cold water, making his blood run cold.

This has to be some kind of sick joke.

All of it.

“Jungkook?” Your voice trembles, barely a whisper, as if the sound of his name out loud might shatter you to pieces.

He’s standing in front of you, drenched from the rain, his wet dark hair hanging messily in his face — so much longer than it used to be. He has new piercings on his face, and his features have definitely matured. He looks…different, yet somehow exactly how you remember him. His big dark eyes lock onto yours, and for a moment, you feel your world stop.

“Y/n?” His voice cracks slightly, like he’s just been punched in the gut. “Wh…what are you doing here?” but there’s no anger in his voice, just confusion, and perhaps, a hint of something painful. His words hang heavy between you, getting lost in the sounds of the burning city beyond this tiny street, and you feel a paralysing weight on your chest. Your mind reeling beyond comprehension.

You open your mouth to speak, ready to say something, anything. But you feel like you’ve forgotten how to form words. So you close it again, no words come out. His eyes flicker from your face to the little girl clutching your side, and you feel a pit sinking in your stomach. God, please no.

This can’t be happening — not here, not now.

Not like this.

You want to bolt, to run and not look back like you always do. You wish the earth would just swallow you entirely. But all you can do is stand there, your heart pounding faster in your chest, mouth dry.

You try to step around him, desperate to move forward, to escape this horror. But before you know it, his hand catches your arm. He grips you gently, but with a force that indicates he won’t let you slip away again. His touch almost makes you fall to your knees.

“Come with me.”

Your body stiffens at his words, and you swat your arm loose of his grip. You lift Jieun into your arms instinctively, fingers curling around her small body as if the mere act of holding her can shield you from everything. From him, from all the pain, from all of this living nightmare.

“No,” you say, the word coming out broken, like your breath is caught. “I can’t go with you. I need- I need to get hob-”

“My apartment isn’t far,” he cuts in, not giving you space to say more. “We need to get off the streets.’’

You hesitate, watching his gaze scurry between you both again. Everything in you is telling you to just run, to put as much distance as you can between yourself and Jungkook. Willing this conversation to die before it can even begin. Before he can start asking questions you’re not ready to answer. Before you have to face things you’ve already buried deep. Before it’s too late. You need to leave. But Jieun is shaking, clutching onto you for dear life as she whimpers against your chest, and the sounds of screams still ringing in your ears. And there’s infected everywhere. You’re stuck in the middle of a warzone, and you have no idea what to do, no idea where to go.

All you know is you need to get Jieun out of this. Away from danger.

“Have you not seen what the fuck is going on? People have gone fucking insane!” His tone grows harsher now, trying to knock some sense into you. “We need to move.”

A gut wrenching scream echoes from somewhere beyond the alley, closer than before this time. Too close.

Jungkook swears under his breath, running a hand through his hair, torn between a storm of brewing emotions and the immediate danger closing in. His jaw tightens as he looks behind him then back to you. “Y/n, we need to go. Now.”

You shake your head violently, and you can feel hushed tears burning behind your eyes. You can’t breathe, can’t think clearly. All you can feel is Jieun trembling in your arms.

“Please-” his voice drops, raw and desperate. Almost a plea.

And don’t know when or why it happens, but the next thing you know, your feet are moving. You’re running with everything you have left in you.

Somehow, the world is ending, and you’re allowing yourself to be guided by Jungkook down streets devoured by chaos, heading to the only safe place around you.

His home.

➵ taglist: @amatun28 @ahgasegotarmy116 @knjs95s @jeoncookiebar @badaspice @lachimolalajeon @tearykth @lovingkoalaface @jcrl99 @hellbornsworld @mortqlprojections @xumyboo @honeymeraki @justanarchiveforfics @iamnotdrunk420 @iveivory @k-p0p-4ever @jksjx @yoonberriez @lotustv @hannahmae18 @eclipsethemagic @bybyash @rjooniesdimples @minimoninini @satisfied18 @pinkpunkdynamite @jheneeko @sungiesworld27 @neuviloved @somehowukook @iohwa-com @lola75111 @hanversace @ot7even @rie-pdf @futuristicenemychaos @chl0buggy @happycheesecakedelusion @busanbby-jjk @minyoongi7016 @stellamalonesolaria @qyurryus-m @ex7stance @dchimminie

#m: jungkook #t: series #g: apocolypse #g: exes to lovers #g: parents au #g: angst #g: smut #AAAHHHHHHHH THIS WAS SO GOOD IM ON THE EDGE OF MY SEAT #but also i’m genuinely terrified about this angst bc if anyone i like dies… lord help me

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kasagia · 2 months ago

Text

I love you... I am sorry III

Pairing: Aleksander Morozova/The Darkling x fem!witch! reader Summary: Your past is catching up with you, Aleksander regains his full powers, and everyone around you says you're losing your mind. Too bad that they didn't notice that you went mad agea ago. Aleksander Morozova's Masterlist ~•♤♤♤•~Main Masterlist ~•♤♤♤•~ Part 2 ~•♤♤♤•~ Part 4 ~•♤♤♤•~

"How did you do that?" Ulla asks you as you both hunt for food in the forest. You move slowly through the trees, keeping an eye out for any movement in the bushes in the distance or the audible sound of a deer or a wild boar.

"What?" You ask, stopping. You close your eyes and focus on the sounds around you. You place your hand on the tree trunk next to you and focus on its energy, the tips of its leaves fluttering in the wind and the veins in its roots. You open your eyes when you locate a deer nearby and nod to the black-haired one to follow you.

"Dragging Aleksander here with us. Mother was convinced that we would go alone with Alina and her retinue. And yet he actually ordered them to take him with us on this journey."

You shrug at her words and prepare your bow when you manage to spot deer tracks in the snow. You slowly follow the trail, telling Ulla to be quiet. A few seconds later, a whistle pierces the forest as you hit your target with an arrow.

"I'm not inside his mind. I have no idea what made him decide to come with us." You sigh, feeling the woman's gaze on you. She throws the small game you'd hunted earlier over her shoulder and helps you carry the deer to your camp.

"That's the kind of crap you're telling my mother. I know perfectly well that he changed his mind because of you. You avoid being around him like the plague when he doesn't have a gag, and he keeps looking at you like a desperate, furious, kicked puppy. Just blurt it out and say what you did."

You want to roll your eyes at her, but you keep any hint of your irritation to yourself. Your hand instinctively goes to your bare neck—the place where the glass heart pendant once rested. And Aleksander's blood. You don't know what he did with it, and honestly you don't want to know.

Lately you've been overcome by... a feeling of emptiness. Numbness. Not of your limbs because the magical properties of the heart necklace have left, but... of your soul. You've had it a few times before, usually during the winter-spring equinoxes. Ordinary people had the biggest endorphin surge then. You, on the other hand... let's just say you found your way better in the darkness and shadows of the longer nights... not because of one Shadow Summoner.

"He annoys me. I don't need to be around him anymore, so I don't. Besides, I'm almost certain that he's planning my painful, long, torturous death this way. At the hands of the volcra or his nichevo'ya—I'm not sure yet." You shrug and fall silent as you approach the camp.

You frown when you see that the fire is almost extinguished, and there is not a single living soul around it. Strange. Very.

"You two are like two stubborn donkeys. When will you realize that you really…"

"Stay behind." You tell Ulla and release the deer. She gasps from the sudden burden but makes no further sound at the sight of you acting strangely.

You approach the fire and use your boot to sweep away the ash that was left there from the burnt branches. You wrinkle your nose and uncertainly reach for a log to throw it into the fire. You crouch over the barely burning hearth and blow, throwing in a handful of dried herbs from your hip bag, causing the fire to suddenly ignite with a living flame. And in the process, you remove another witch's spell.

You gasp as you are suddenly pinned to the ground, a hooded figure looming over you, now holding a dagger to your neck. Out of the corner of your eye, you see Baghra, Alina, her loyal friends tied up next to the Aleksander, right where you left him.

You snarl as the witch presses the dagger to your neck, drawing your attention back to her.

"Jelena. We haven't seen each other for a long time. How long has it been? An age? Two?"

"What betrayed me?" She asks dryly, completely ignoring your attempts at decent conversation. Rude. You mentally prepare yourself for a fight with her.

"The seal under the ashes. If you can't cast a spell without drawing your weird markings, just don't do it." You mock her as she presses the dagger to your skin

You hiss in pain, crimson-black blood running down the column of your throat, drawing the younger witch's attention. Jelena bulges at you, her hand on the dagger trembling as she surveys her handiwork.

"You are vulnerable. It can't be real…" She mutters to herself in shock, scanning your blood as if it were a living stream of water in the desert.

"Not so vulnerable." You gasp and use your magic to throw her off of you. You sigh, pressing a hand to your neck and feeling the sticky blood on your fingers. "I still have a few tricks up my sleeve. So if I were you, I wouldn't taste me. What do you want?"

"Kill you. Just like practically all of the witches from Ravka and Fjerda."

You snort at her obvious statement, watching in relief as she tucks the dagger into her boot. It's nice that for old times' sake she decided not to slaughter you with such a primitive tool. Ulla's searing gaze reminds you that you need to be quick with her if you don't want the young Morozova to enter this interaction uninvited.

"Oh please. I'm not that popular." You joke, earning a slight twitch at the corners of her mouth. You sigh, sitting down by the fire and nodding for her to do the same, ignoring the stares of your forced companions. Especially the one with exceptionally dark irises. "I thought you had finished your hunt for me a long time ago?"

"It's nothing personal. The Great Witch has a bounty on your head. And I need the money they offer for your head. I happened to be passing by and heard your name. I decided to try my luck."

"And they say it's a bad thing to gossip." You mock your bonded companions. "Since when does Reyana want me dead?"

"The leadership in the coven has changed since you were gone. Reyana is dead. Luke has taken command."

"That son of a whore..."

"Believe me, I hate him more than you. But I need this reward, Y/N." She says, sending you a serious, meaningful look. You sigh, knowing exactly what you need in exchange for her 'loyalty' to you.

You stand up and go to Nikolai's bag, rummaging through his things, pulling out a pouch of gold and playing with King Ravka's coins, looking from under your lashes at your old companion.

"How much does he value my head then?"

"5 thousand gold bars for your heart. And thousand for your head."

You scoff at the absurdity of the amount. You fiddle with the purse a little, casting a spell of limitlessness on it. You sigh, closing your eyes as you use up a significant portion of your powers on such a… trivial thing. You knew perfectly well that Jelena didn't have the strength or resources to acquire such a spell. None of the lesser witches did. But you were no ordinary witch…

"Nice. Maybe I could give them to him myself; it would be more rewarding than watching over those spoilt children." You mumble, sitting down by the fire and throwing the purse at her.

She raises her eyebrows, turning it over, trying to spill all its contents. When she sees that the coins are not running out, she raises her eyebrows, gives you a wicked, wolfish grin, and puts it in her bag.

"Since when have you been dealing with kings and queens?" She asks curiously, nodding at the people she has trapped.

"Since when circumstances force me." You mumble and dig into the pocket of your coat. You lean in and hand her a roll of paper, text starting to appear on it. “Here. An illusion spell. Strong enough to trick Luke into thinking you gave him my head and not some farmer or criminal’s.”

"He'll kill me if he finds out I've deceived him. Why would I help you and make him believe you're dead?"

"Who said you knew it wasn't me? Sell him a story; you can lie, right? You'll have your money, and I'll have peace... for a while. We both know I'm stronger than you. You would never win anyway. So take advantage of my generous and good heart and leave. Or I will make sure you won't be able to."

"Smart. And cunning. But watch yourself. There are many besides me who will try. And when no one succeeds… Luke himself will come for you." She warns you and stands up, dusting the dirt off herself.

"Oh I know. And I can't wait." You promise her, the dark, cold tone of your voice sending shivers down the young witch's spine.

"By the way, your boyfriend is cute. I understand now why you killed half of our coven for him." She adds with a wicked smile, nodding her head in Aleksander's direction. "If he didn't stink of you so much… I might still be tempted." She says, licking her lips.

"He is centuries older than you." You growl at her, fighting the blush that wants to bloom on your cheeks at her words.

"Has that ever stopped us?" She asks cheekily, waving at you before disappearing into the fire she started. You giggle, finally letting yourself lose control.

You take deep breaths and press your hands to the ground as a trail of blood begins to run down your nose. Damn necklace. The lack of it has weakened you more than you thought it would.

“What the fuck was that?” Ulla asks, being at your side sooner than you’d like.

You take a few ragged breaths, feeling her gently brush your hair away from your face and soothingly rub your back as shivers run through your body. You were too old for this shit.

"The past. And too much use of magic. Don't worry, lapushka. It'll pass… in a few hours." You assure her and place a hand on her shoulder, standing on wobbly legs. "Take care of these idiots. I need to take a nap for a while." You say and trudge to your tent.

Aleksander's glance is duly ignored by you.

“Will you stay for dinner?” Aleksander asks you, trying to control little Ulla who was running around the room, already setting the table for three.

“Will you stay forever?” His little sister asks you, completely ignoring her brother. You laugh, amazed at how happily she welcomed you just hours after you first met.

You kneel down to be at her height and send a few dust butterflies her way, cleaning the table that has been unused for a long time.

"I will stay as long as you want me to." You declare solemnly, to which Ulla throws herself into your arms with joy, chattering about how she will finally have someone suitable to play with dolls, because Aleksander, with his too low voice, is not suitable for pretending to be a princess.

You smile, stroking her dark hair. You lift your head to take a glimpse at your lover, but instead of seeing that beautiful, tender look he gave you whenever you and Ulla had one of these interactions, he looks at you with a blank, distant gaze. And from the shadows gently swirling in the corner of the room and his clenched fists, you can tell that nothing pleasant is on his mind.

"Ulla, go get some bread from the kitchen. Y/N, she must be starving after this exhausting day." The girl nods on command and runs excitedly for food. You know perfectly well that her obedience will not last long. She will disappear the moment her excitement dies down. "Don't promise her such a thing."

"Why? Are you bored of me already?"

"Because we both know perfectly well that sooner or later you'll leave us." You open your mouth to start arguing with him, but he continues, not giving you the opportunity. "You... won't be living as long as we will."

"Aleksander..." You mumble and try to put a hand on his shoulder, but he pulls away from you before you can.

He grips the back of the wooden chair, barely sparing you a glance, and your heart aches to see him going back down the old paths of isolation Baghra had led him down.

You won't let him do that though. Not after he's claimed you as his. You walk over to him and gently cup his cheek in your hand, briefly appreciating the way his delicate stubble teases your skin before you pull him in for a kiss, momentarily dispelling his dark thoughts and the shadows he's unwittingly let loose.

You loved kissing him. His soft lips against yours, the quiet sighs every time you tenderly caressed his cheek, his hair, the way he trembled under the smallest act of your undeniable love and tenderness. You loved him. Madly. To death. Sometimes so much that it worried you how much power he had over you. Almost as much power you had over him.

"I promise you. I will find a way. I AM finding a way. And I will stay forever. Even if I have to claw my way into eternity, I'll fucking do it because I love you. More than anything in this saint-forsaken world." You whisper shakily and press your lips to his in a silent promise.

Aleksander wraps his arms around you, enveloping you in a tight embrace as he presses you against his chest, hiding you from the world in the safe warmth of him around you. He buries his face in the crook of your neck, allowing himself to be vulnerable with you - rare moments that you hold close to your heart.

"I... just don't give her false hope... and me." He mumbles against the skin of your icy neck, sending shivers down your spine from his warm breath.

"My dear Shadow Summoner... I will never leave you. I promise. Nothing will take me away from you. Neither Baghra nor death." You say, stroking his hair and pressing a kiss to his temple.

"I would be careful with Baghra." He mumbles a quiet warning against your ear, and you giggle, pressing kisses along the line of his jaw.

"I am not scared of shadows anymore." You promise him tenderly and capture his lips in a gentle, slow kiss, enjoying the way he entwines his hand in your hair and pulls you as close to him as possible, as if he wanted to make sure that really no force would tear you away from his embrace.

"I love you. I will always love you." He whispers against your lips and rests his forehead against yours, inhaling your scent deeply.

"I love you too."

Your bubble of peace only lasts for a moment. A few seconds later you hear quick, small footsteps as his sister returns.

"I found honey!" She exclaims happily and places the jar in the middle of the table, right next to the bread.

You give her a smile, ignoring Aleksander's embarrassed blush and destroying his attempts to explain the small supplies of their pantry by announcing that you're going fishing tomorrow. After all, they had to eat something.

As it turned out later, you had never been happier than that night, eating bread with honey in the company of the two people most important to you.

"So? Who was that?" Alina takes you out for a chat as soon as you leave your tent.

You look around the clearing, seeing Zoya and Nikolai sitting next to each other with bowls of food, Ulla writing in her book next to a still-tied Aleksander, and Baghra watching it all from a distance with a sneer on her face. It's a good thing Feydor, Ivan, Genya and David had the decency not to stare at you like the rest of them did when you went closer to the campfire for food.

"I have no idea what you're on about." You mumble, rubbing your aching temples and with a grateful smile you take the plate of food from Ulla. Deer. Oh the irony.

"No? So who immobilized us all 4 hours ago?"

"Maybe Ivan was having a bad day." You say evasively, biting into the meat. You really had the feeling that you were going to kill more than just that deer today. You wonder how much the world would miss Alina Starkov.

"Y/N…" Ulla starts, giving you one of her damn looks that you can't refuse. Bitch. She must have learned that from her brother.

"You have your past and I have my past. You don't need to know anything more."

"But our past does not threaten our mission." You raise an eyebrow at Alina's words and cast a significant glance at Aleksander - your first in weeks. You freeze as his dark irises stare back at you.

Another mistake you made today. You think to yourself as you let yourself drown in the blackness of his eyes. And you see many things there. Betrayal, pain, rage, but also... concern. For reasons obvious only to saints, he cared about what happened today. He really cared.

Before you can escape to the safe materials of your tent walls, Ulla unties the gag and ropes binding Aleksander. (The condition he was here under – he was to have shackles blocking his powers and a gag if he tried to throw another fold. They only took them off when you were nearby to eventually stop him.)

Your delayed reflexes cause you to stand, but you don't get very far before his cold, commanding voice echoes through the camp.

"Stop."

You freeze. Your heart beats a few times, but you don't turn to him yet, your gaze goes to the forest path that could take you far away from here and this uncomfortable conversation.

"Don't even try." It's like he reads your mind. A second later, he's standing right behind you, grabbing your arm and forcing you to turn to face him. You lift your chin, giving him an emotionless look, silently hoping he can't feel your heartbeat through his grip on your wrist. "Who was that?"

"My friend. Old one. From my last coven." You answer as briefly as you can, trying to ignore the way he stares at you intensely, as if he wants to rip the true, better answer out of your soul through your eyes.

"That's what I heard. Same with the part where she talks about how you killed half of them for me. Why?

A shiver runs down your spine, your heart clenching at the dry, indifferent way he asks you the question. So you do the one thing you do best – you enter a self-defence mood.

"None of your fucking business." You growl, practically spitting angrily in his face.

He raises an eyebrow at you, the tension between you so palpable that out of the corner of your eye you see Alina nodding at the others to move away from the two of you, clearly taking them out of the potential path of your mutual rage.

And good. You've never desired more to hit him ever before. To sink your claws into his heart and make him suffer as you did. To send him the darkest curse you have in your books. To leave him as miserable, as abandoned, as hurt, as angry as you have been all these centuries without him.

He deserves that for being a hypocrite. He... he had no right to worry about you when he was acting like this. So cold to you. Like nothing ever connected you. Like you where nothing to him.

"Everything you do in my name is my damn business. But let's move on to more pressing matters, why on earth was she able to hurt you? Why were you bleeding? I thought you were beyond… that you were insensitive to any attack."

"It's none of your damn business anymore." You repeat firmly, seething with rage that he has the nerve to be outraged at you for allowing yourself to be hurt. Like you're begging Jelena to put a dagger to your neck.

"Y/N..." Ulla's warning fades beneath the rush of shadows across the clearing.

His burst of power is so sudden and so fast that you can't block it, not with so much emotion churning inside you. And the bastard took advantage of the moment perfectly.

As if from a distance you can hear Ulla and Alina's screams as she tries to shine her light through his shadows, but Aleksander is stronger even than the Sun Summoner with her amplifiers.

Which is logical. He's had centuries of practice.

Without your necklace, all you can do is stand there, dazed by the sudden darkness around you. And though his shadow creatures growl around you, though you should be looking around frantically for a way to escape from him, all you can do is look into his eyes as he maneuvers you and pins you to a tree with his body.

You see many things in his eyes. Fury, rage, spite, and resentment, most of all. He wraps his hand around your neck, tightening it, reopening the wound that had somehow healed itself during your brief nap.

He watches the blood run down the column of your neck, staining his fingers. His grip on your throat tightens. You grunt and snort, fighting for air, but he doesn't seem to notice at all. He stares at your red and black blood, completely ignoring your gaze.

"Go on. Kill me. Do it." You hoarse into his face, his grip on your neck tightening.

Shadows circle around you like crazy, you can hear the others' cries in the distance, but they're effectively muffled the moment he leans down and rests his forehead against yours.

You freeze, completely unaware of what's going on. How can he be so hateful towards you one moment and then… hold you so gently, like you're still the only thing in this damn world that matters to him?

"You're a damn poison. A plague. How many times... how many times when I think I've finally gotten rid of you, you come back and…" He sighs, and you feel his breath tremble slightly as he traces the wound on your neck with his index finger. "I've dreamed of killing you as many times as I have of having you in my arms again."

The confession catches you off guard a little. You wonder if he wants to sweeten your death with sweet lies, but you know Aleksander. He doesn't lie. He just avoids the truth that's inconvenient for him, but he's never lied to you... unlike you.

"Same here." You mumble as your noses brush.

His lips so close to yours, memories of the days when you had every right to press your lips against his, to feast on him like he was the best delicacy in all of Ravka. He was still... just not yours anymore.

"I hate you." He whispers, shattering your heart into another thousand little pieces.

"I know." You answer, swallowing hard. After a while he pulls away from you. No hesitation. No trembling. As if pulling away from you was as easy as pulling away from a stranger. A slip in his composed stance. That was all you could count on.

The lack of his hands on your body, the cold without his touch becomes something much more uncomfortable than his gentle strangling of your neck. You wonder what would be better, death by his hand, as he holds you, or without him, living each day alone with the ghostly memory of his touch. Indeed, there are fates worse than death.

"Never again… never give it to me again." He says and pulls your necklace out of the pocket of his kefta. The glass heart with his blood rests on your neck again. He gently lifts the material of your shirt and hides it under it, covering it with his hand. Your heart beats like crazy under his palm. Pathetic how small and helpless you felt under his slightest touch. How desperate you were for him like a dry well for water. "I don't want… don't leave me. Not you."

"But you hate me." You mumble, unable to meet his gaze. Not if you want to maintain some dignity and not cry in front of him.

"And I've known you too long for you to die before me. Just like everyone else."

If he knew that with each such confession your heart was dying in longing for him, he didn't seem at all merciful today to spare you them. Or maybe he just didn't want to be merciful to you anymore.

"I have no intention of dying after you." You respond with a challenge of your own, congratulating yourself internally as you see his gaze harden and his hand involuntarily clench into a fist. It felt good to know you could hurt him as much as he could hurt you. That you still affect him...

"You killed those witches… to gain the spell to create this. Yes or no?" He asks, his hand tightening on the glass necklace hidden under your shirt.

You swallow, looking away from him. He’s having none of it. He grabs your chin and forces you to look at him properly, to confront the pieces of your past you’ve desperately wanted to keep from him.

"Yes." You mumble, unable to stop yourself from leaning into his touch.

"You are a monster." He responds, stroking your jawline with his thumb as he looks at you with a faraway gaze, thinking intensively.

"Everyone with as many centuries lived as we do is one." You state, undaunted by his accusation.

All was fair in love and war.

And when you were at war with Ravka, Fjerda, with the whole world against you, when he and Ulla were everything to you... what else could you have done? Nothing. If you could turn back time, you would go back and do the exact same thing.

Love could make you crazy, reckless, selfish, monstrous, but if you could live another day with Aleksander... you would do the same and worse. Much worse. You could do anything in the name of your love for him.

Even kill yourself.

Even live for him forever.

"Who is chasing you?" He asks, but seeing you turn your head away from him again, he cups your cheek and forces you to look at him properly. He leans in a little, his fingers unconsciously caressing your skin, which burns from his touch. And you want, no, you CRAVE more. So much more… "Y/N."

Your name falls like a whispered prayer from his lips, so tender, so different from the way he treats you now, so similar to the way he whispered it in the middle of the night and pulled you into the safe embrace of his arms.

You almost cry. You almost cry for him; you almost cling to him, crying your heart out, explaining to him the sacrifices you've made for him, how many enemies you've made by giving him your heart and yourself completely. But you don't. No, knowing he'll pull away from you the moment he gets the information he needs.

You weren't that much of a masochist.

"It's none of your business. I'm not yours. And you're not mine either."

You don't know who you're reminding of this, whether it's him, yourself, or both of you, but after your words he goes back to his cold demeanor towards you.

"You're right. Sometimes I forget about it." He pulls away from you as if burned.

You feel him shrinking the number of his shadows, letting his power hide again. After a moment, a blinding light appears instead of his shadows, and then you are back in the clearing, Aleksander, as usual, an ocean away from you.

"Good job, Alinochka." He praises her, giving her one of his smirks that once made you melt. Now it makes bile rise in your throat.

You know perfectly well that he's saying this specifically to hurt you, to show you the truth of your words. To prove to you that after all these centuries he has moved on and is truly no longer yours.

But that didn't mean it hurt any less.

And when you see Alina staring at him with the same inscrutable, angry, and lovesick gaze you had all those centuries ago at the beginning of your relationship, you know one thing.

You were slowly getting tired of apologising to him for loving him.

It's been ages. It felt like ages. I hope you enjoyed it! Any comments/messages/hearts are greatly appreciated and thank you so much!!! If you want to, let me know what you think 🥰🖤🖤🖤

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