#taylor swift outerbanks

[pink-princess-pussy-pop]

MASTERMIND - A Rafe Cameron x Reader Taylor Swift AU

DEBUT: Invisible

FEARLESS: You Belong With Me

SPEAK NOW: Foolish One

RED: Better Man

1989: Now That We Don't Talk

REPUTATION: Dress

LOVER: I Forgot That You Existed

FOLKLORE: Betty

EVERMORE: Long Story Short

MIDNIGHTS: Mastermind

Bonus: THE TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT: Guilty As Sin?

[karmasloverrr]

fresh out the slammer - rafe cameron

in which y/n realizes the only man she wants isn’t the one standing across from her at the alter

warnings- swearing, angst, kissing, mention of abuse

w/c: idk but a lot

guys this is my first fic so be kind please but like..also leave feedback lmao

———————————————————————————

Soaking in a bubble filled tub, wallowing in your sorrows and mind even hazier from your third glass of red wine, the fight you just had with your fiancé- soon to be husband- left you with an insurmountable amount of racing thoughts.

Getting home late was a recurring pattern for Tommy, drunk and tattered with his tie undone as well as an occasional obnoxiously red lipstick stain underneath his jaw, mocking you when he turns his head away from your “incessant nagging and bitching”.

You asking where he had been turned into hands pulling hair from stress, voice cracks of screeching anger, broken shards of glass from being flown into walls and streams of tears when he put his hands around your neck, again.

“Cover that up for tomorrow.” Catching your breath you glared at him with nothing but hate and irritation.

“Yeah, wouldn’t want the town knowing you’re I’m marrying an abuser or anything.”

Tommy whips around with a finger in your face. “Watch your fucking mouth, Y/N. You’d be nothing without me, your last name changing is a blessing to you, appreciate it. Knowing you’ll be associated with my family and reputation isn’t something to take lightly, got it?”

You stood there just taking it. Staring dazedly at the wall in your kitchen, anything to avoid looking at the man you once respected and maybe even loved.

Your father would be so ashamed of you, he never raised you to take shit from anyone, especially a man who didn’t deserve an ounce of your time. He tragically died when you were 15, leaving you with a narcissistic, alcoholic mother. The reason you were even in this situation with Tommy.

Tommy belonged to one of the most prominent and wealthy families in the OBX. The Randolphs have always had a good relationship with your family, with your dad being a loyal accountant associated with their law firm. After your dad passed they treated you and your mother like some charity cases, always baking food and lending money, to which your mother gladly took.

Your mother suggested the idea of marriage to Tommys parents after she caught you blushing too hard and smiling a little to often about “that Cameron boy”. Rafe Cameron had a reputation around Kildare and it wasn’t a good one. Drug addicted, college dropout, psychopath and constantly picking fights were all tied to his name but to you, he was the only reason the sun came up each morning.

Like you, he lost a parent at a young age, his mother. Trauma bonding and sharing hatred with the Randolph family became a stepping stone for you both. You met through Topper at a party in high school and never really looked back, you became inseparable.

Years spent indulging in each other’s company was platonic until a few years ago when he started looking at you a little more intensely, leaving longing glances and stolen stares across crowded rooms. You both knew your feelings but never spoke it into existence, seeing as you were then just freshly engaged.

Now here you stand, with no love in your heart for the man you’re supposed to spend the rest of your life with starting tomorrow, glaring at him stomping up the spiral stairs of your far too perfect and ridiculously gigantic sized “home”.

The drip of the tub faucet echoes throughout the bathroom, your foot thoughtlessly turning the water dial on and off every few seconds. Absently staring off into space, your face is blank but your mind is racing. You are at a true gut wrenching loss at what to do.

The only thing pulling you out of your daze is a text notification buzzing the ceramic tile counter. You snap your head to the phone, looking almost offended that someone could even concur to bother you right now.

Reluctantly, you step out of the bath grabbing a nearby towel to wrap around yourself. You pick up the phone to view the notification, Rafe.

Meet at beach in 10? I know it’s late.

Your lips tip up in a smile, it’s almost as if he knew your mind was off someplace else, the beach brings you both back to your rightful state of inner peace.

You type a few answers out, sounding too excited or desperate, you just delete them and start again. You can see it in your head, he’s probably biting his thumb nail in anticipation seeing the text bubble come and go, it makes you smile and bite your lip.

Yes, want me to pick you up?

He responds before you can even re-read what you said.

I’m already here…

You laugh out loud, covering you mouth knowing Tommy is already asleep in your shared bedroom right outside.

You type out a quick “of course you are, be there soon” before fully starting to dry yourself off. Rafe loves your message, signaling that he saw it.

Quietly entering your bedroom you pick out the easiest things to put on, settling on a crew neck, loose shorts and your birkenstocks.

Somehow you managed to leave your house unscathed but this isn’t the first time you’ve snuck out to meet Rafe and it won’t be the last.

The hidden path that you and Rafe found years ago comes into view, it leads right out to a hidden cove, making it feel like a secret that only you and him know, shutting out the rest of the island.

You take off your sandals and feel the sand enveloping your feet, you can smell his cigarettes and see him scratching the top of his buzzed head.

“Hi sweetheart.” He didn’t need to turn around to know you were there, he could just feel the air getting light around him, or at least he saw it that way.

You walk over and sit down matching his position with knees up to your chest, bumping elbows in the process. “Hi Rafe, what’s going on?” you ask in a hushed tone as if there’s multiple people around.

He looks at you now, taking in your natural hair flowing down to your back and a far out look in your eyes. His chest squeezes at how beautiful you look without even trying. “Shouldn’t I be asking you, Ms. Y/L/N, or should I say soon to be Mrs. Randolph?”

You chuckle with your tongue touching the inside of your cheek, “I don’t want to talk about it or him. Especially here, this is my safe space, our space so just let’s not, please”. You look at him with pleading eyes, he nods with understanding eyes as he blows smoke from the side of his mouth.

You sit in a comfortable silence for 10 minutes, enjoying each other’s company and listening to the sounds of the waves crashing up the sand, with every pull of the current washing away your stress.

Rafe breaks it by flicking his cigarette, clearing his throat and taking a deep breath, “You don’t have to, you know that right? It’s obvious you don’t fucking want to so just don-“ You shake your head and let out an unstable sigh.

“It’s tomorrow, Rafe. I can’t just call it all off, it’s too late, I have relatives from all over the country flying in, his family spent so much money I can’t just-“

“Fuck his family and fuck your relatives, respectfully. Do you think your grandparents o-or your aunts and uncles would support this knowing what’s going on in your head and heart? Cause I certainly don’t.”

“It’s not that simple. It doesn’t matter and our families, my mother would be disappointed and his dad would probably have me sent to a fucking asylum saying I went crazy or something” Your cheeks get increasingly hot with anger, so frustrated with your situation.

“Who fucking cares, Y/N/N? This isn’t something small like missing a dinner party or calling in sick to work, this is your future a-and the rest of your life if you don’t make a decision, seriously sweetheart it’s ridiculous.”

The nickname makes your stomach drop in ways Tommy never could. Rafe’s passion and way of words always leaves you feeling giddy.

You bite down on your lip, hard, to stop the fleeting tears building in your eyes and looking away from him to avoid them falling even quicker. He takes his calloused palm and places it on your cheek to turn your face towards his. “You aren’t happy, you know you’re not, I know you’re not and it’s killing me” He punctuates his words, shaking your face a little bit as if to really drill his feelings into your brain.

You look up at him with wet and tired eyes, knowing no matter how much he’s right, there’s just no way to fix this. You bring your hand up to meet his own on your cheek, intertwining your fingers.

“I appreciate your passion Rafe, I really do and I wish I could go back and say no but it’s just- there’s no use. It’s done and I fucked up and that’s on me.” You stare into his eyes, competing with the ocean in front of you.

His eyebrows furrow as if he’s in pain, he licks his lips and scoffs, hand and eyes leaving your face, making you feel cold.

It’s silent again, the air growing thick with tension until he breaks it, again.

“Let’s run away, yeah let’s do it.” He shakes his head in approval like he’s just solved the mystery, “I can buy us ferry tickets and we’ll never come back here again.”

It’s your turn to scoff and shake your head, “Now that’s ridiculous, seriously, Rafe? This isn’t some fairytale, we can’t just fly away to Neverland.”

“Why not, Y/N? You’ve always talked about wanting to live in Massachusetts. I’ll buy us a house on Martha’s Vineyard, we can have our own beach and 2 dogs an-“

You stand up in a fit of rage, sand flying everywhere from the abrupt reaction. “Wake up, Rafe! I’m getting married tomorrow. It’s happening and there’s nothing you or I can do to fix that.” You cross your arms before rolling your eyes and stomping away.

Rafe is quick to match your pace and grabs your forearm, flipping you around so your chests are touching and faces inches apart. “You’re the only one that can fix this. It seems like I want this wedding called off more than you do.” You’re both panting, from proximity and the situation but you’re convinced it’s just because of the heated back and forth.

“Rafe please, you need to let this go, for me please.”

“I can’t just let this go Y/N/N. You’re marrying a piece of shit who doesn’t make you happy and I know you don’t love him, tell me you don’t” His desperate eyes leaving aches in your heart.

He places both of his hands lightly on your neck but due to Tommy and his previous anger, you wince in pain from the bruises. Rafe notices, of course he does and you see it register in his eyes, pupils dilated turning from passion to pure exasperation.

He swallows heavily, his adams apple bobbing up and down. “Y/N. I’m gonna ask you something and you better tell me the fucking truth. Did he do that? Who did this to you?”

You grab onto his forearms and bore your eyes into his. “Please” you beg, knowing exactly how this is gonna go. He shakes his head, breathing in and out of his nose, bending down slightly to inspect the marks, moving your neck around slowly to examine.

“Baby. I can see where he placed his hands and pressed, so hard that you bruised?” His voice begins to crack, so devastated that anyone could ever imagine putting their hands on your beautiful face.

Tears have started shedding down your face, reaching yours and his conjoined hands. “Rafe. I-“ He lets go of your neck and starts trudging through the sand back towards the path. Your eyes widen and you run after him.

“I’m gonna fucking kill him, wring his neck out so he knows how it feels.” You shake your head and catch up to him, stepping infront of his chest and placing your hands there.

“I’m begging you, Rafe. I’m okay, see I’m perfectly fine. Please don’t do this.” Your patting his chest now, doing anything to relax him.

He looks down at you, eyes going from rage to sadness when your face comes into view. He lets out a whine and pulls your head into his chest. “You’re somethin’ else. Your soon-to-be husband puts his hands on you and you’re still gonna go through with it? So stubborn, always have been”

You laugh through your tears at how messed up it is. You wrap your arms around his shoulders and lean into his touch, rubbing your hand through his buzzed hair at the base of his neck.

“Rafe?” you remove your head from his chest and look up at him which causes him to look down at you as well, he hums in response, eager to hear what you have to say.

“I understand if you say no but, um you being there tomorrow would really help ease my nerves.” You wince, knowing how absurd the question is but it’s true, you need him there to be able to function.

“I cave on a lot of things for you but seeing the girl I’m in love with get married to someone who doesn’t deserve even a glance from you, is where I draw the line”

You widen your eyes and gawk at his confession, neither of you have ever mentioned the feelings that linger between the both of you, a love confession for the ages is the last thing you expected.

“Rafe, W-“ you shake your head, at a loss for words and mind blank.

He kisses his teeth and smiles out of vain. “I just can’t bring myself to witness everything I’ve ever wanted happen to another man”.

A heartbroken sigh leaves your lips, “Rafe, please don’t make this harder than it already is.”

He shrugs smugly, weight lifted off his shoulders at the overdue confession.

“Sorry, sweetheart but it’s true. I just can’t bear it”

You take a deep breath, wiping the stray tears that have fallen off your face. But then something happens, it takes over you, the urge. Fuck it, you place your hands on his cheeks and dive into his lips, standing on your tip toes for leverage.

You both don’t move for a second, not sure what to do, just the feeling of each other’s lips together being overwhelming enough.

Rafe mentally curses himself for not acting faster but as soon as he comes back down to Earth, one hand flys to your face and the other to your back. You use his arm behind you for support as you lean into it causing him to lean down as the kiss intensifies.

Minutes spent like this, expressing every emotion your both feeling into the kiss, breaking away only to catch each other’s breath before diving right back in.

It lasts a few minutes longer before you pull away, leaning your forehead on his, nose’s bumping. Swallowing, you begin “Rafe, I lov-“. He shakes his head and gives you a fleeting peck, “Please don’t.”

“But Rafe I-“ He nods.

“I know, sweetheart. I know, but if you say it I’m really taking you to Massachusetts and you won’t have a choice.”

He’s trying to be funny but you don’t laugh, devastated that he’s in so much agony and you caused all of it.

“What are we gonna do?” you plead.

“You made up your mind and I can’t change that, but if you ever do, just know I’m waiting and I’ll wait as long as it takes.” He steps away then, removing his hands and tucking a strand of hair that fell behind your ear.

“I’m sorry, Rafe. I’m so sorry.” You begin to sob now, guilty and just so angry that this is what has happened.

“I know, me too but please don’t cry, Y/N it breaks my heart.” You hug him again, tightly wrapping your arms around his torso.

“It’s getting late and you have a big day tomorrow. Let’s get you home, baby.”

“You’re just tormenting me now.” He laughs, his bright smile on display. “Maybe”, you slap his chest, “You’re an asshole”, which causes you both to laugh now.

He holds you steady by the waist while you put your shoes back on, when you’re done you place your arm around his waist, copying him.

Placing a kiss on your head he leads the way back through the path in the direction of his truck. Silent and reflecting you both have a certain sadness surrounding each other, not knowing how your relationship will change and if you’ll ever see him again but yet there’s a hint of relief and comfort knowing all the built up tension, smitten and blushed cheeks over the years have finally been brought to light.

Looking at your reflection, you don’t recognize yourself. A melancholy, pathetic version of you stares back. With a full face of makeup to cover up hand marks and eye bags from lack of sleep last night, an up-do topped with a vail and a fake smile, you have never seen yourself so miserable, so unrecognizable.

“I can’t believe you’re actually doing this, Y/N. We tried but you just wouldn’t hear it.” Kie paced the bridal room back and forth, just as frustrated as you, knowing her best friend is about to marry the islands biggest piece of shit.

“Kiara, she doesn’t need to hear this right now, ok?” Sarah is behind you, placing bobby pins in places that are needed.

“I’m aware I’ve fucked up, royally. I heard it from Rafe last night and I don’t need to-“. Both girls gasp, “Rafe?”.

You shut your mouth, cursing yourself for exposing the information, sighing you begin to reluctantly tell the girls what had happened.

Sarah and Kie look at you with remorse as you recall the interaction. Sarah takes your hand and Kie begins to tear up. “This is so bad you guys, I don’t know what to do.”

Kie looks around as she says, “Well nothing, now seeing as you have to be on the altar in 10 minutes.” Sarah shoots her a glare as you begin to sob. The girls come over for a group hug, sushing you and rubbing your back.

A knock at the door interrupts your sobs, causing you all to look up at the door as you nod, signaling that Sarah can let them in.

She announces for the person to enter, it’s JJ and he’s holding flowers. “Hi, uh, Tommy asked me to give these to you”. You take one look at the flowers and begin to sob again, “I don’t even like roses and h-he knows that”. With your head in your hands you just want to bury yourself in the hole you dug.

JJ is standing there white as a ghost, looking to Kiara for some support to which she brushes him off. “What did I do?” He confesses.

You look up slowly, sighing and fanning your face. “It’s not your fault JJ. I just hate my soon to be husband, he doesn’t understand me, never has.”

“Wait, what. You’re literally about to marry him in..” JJ stops to look at his watch, “7 minutes”.

You look around to the girls, feeling a panic attack coming on. “Fuck.”

Kie updates JJ on the “Y/N and Tommy lore” as Sarah rubs your back and makes you count and breathe. In the back you can hear JJ gasping and audibly reacting to Kie catching him all up.

When she’s done, JJ comes over to you and gives you a hug from behind. “As much as I don’t like Rafe, sorry Sarah, I really, really don’t like Tommy.” You look at JJ through the mirror and solemnly nod your head to agree.

“He just told me that when Tommy was handing him the flowers, he tipped him a $20 and thought he was a bartender.”

JJ scoffs, “I told him I was sitting in the row literally right behind your families and he just laughed, so yeah I fucking hate him too.” You realize that not only has Tommy tormented your life but all of your friends who you love so much.

“I’m so sorry guys, I’m so sorry you have to be here and I’m so sorry that I didn’t stand up for myself way back when our families arranged this but I just have to deal with it, just have to deal.”

They all nodded and the girls fixed your makeup, getting you ready to meet your wicked mother at the double doors, which led to the guest filled lawn of people who are unknowingly supporting your nightmare.

JJ gave you one last hug and words of encouragement before going to take his seat on the golf green. Sarah and Kie all gave you tight hugs and kisses on the cheek before leading you out of the room. Your mother waited at the end of the country club, beaming with pride and showering you with compliments as your manicured nails dug into your palms.

“Honey, your eye bags look terrible, I’m gonna go ask the makeup lady if she can add some more concealer or something-“ You huffed and slapped her hand away.

“I’m fine, Mom. Please, I just want to get out there.”

She changes her shocked expression of you swatting her hand away to instant radiation of happiness. “Oh, you’re so excited to just be married already, aren’t you?”.

You try your best to make your fake smile believable as she places both hands on your cheeks and nods in approval.

You take the biggest breath as the violins begin to play the bridal entrance, the guests all stand turning their attention towards you and the doors open. This is it, your mother grips your arm and begins to walk you down the flower petal covered isle.

All eyes on you, can they tell how close to breaking down you are? Some people are wiping their eyes with tissues, some stare at you like you’re the prophecy and all you can do is look around, where’s Rafe?

Hands shaking as you see Tommy at the alter, so smug falsely wiping his nose and eyes to put on a show for the Figure Eight mothers, who mourn for their daughters that never got the chance to have his last name.

Before stepping up to meet him, you make quick pleading eye contact with Sarah, she knows exactly what you’re thinking and she shakes her head solemnly and mouths a quiet “no”. He’s not here and you knew he wouldn’t be, in the back of your sick mind you had hope that he’d maybe show up just to be your support but he’s nowhere to be seen, not even lurking a few feet behind the whole ceremony.

Your mother turns to face you, before giving you off to Tommy she places a quick kiss on your cheek then slides her mouth up to your ear, “Don’t embarrass me” she snaps in a sharp whisper.

You pull back with wide eyes but she doesn’t give you time to react before she’s giving you a small shove to meet Tommy’s outstretched hand to guide you up.

In your mind, you hoped you’d be here one day, surrounded by your loved ones on a beautiful North Carolina day to celebrate the marriage of you and your husband. Except the man in front of you would be about 4 inches taller, brown eyes traded for blue and a dimple engraved in his cheek as his bright smile makes your head spin.

Rafe. Rafe. Rafe. Even before you ever realized it, swirled into all of your poems he’s always been the man in your dreams, all your manifestations come to life, everything and all you’ve ever wanted.

Tommy begins declaring that he will love and cherish you through sickness and in health. Looking at you so cynically, you can see everything in his eyes. He’s got you trapped now and there’s nothing you can do.

Now, it’s your turn. With a deep breath and slight pause you begin. “I, Y/N, promise Tommy” Rafe “to love him” Rafe “through sickness and in health” Rafe. It all comes out in a whimper but only you seem to notice.

Tommy turns to the officiant, eager to hear him give the speech that seals this whole thing. “Do you, Tommy Randolph, take Y/N Y/L/N, to be your wife?”

“I do.”

Your heart is racing, feeling as though your whole world is about to come crashing down on you. Rafe, you can see him in your head, handsome face and charming smile, you think back to your encounter last night, promises of fleeing the island and a white picket, blue shuddered house far away from here is all you can focus on, it’s all waiting for you and so is he.

“He’s waiting for me.” the sentence leaves your mouth before you can even help it. Tommy looks up from the ring he’s about to place on your finger. “What?”.

You slightly step back from his body, moving your arm away from the gold 20 carat diamond about to bind you to 40+ years of hell. The officiant doesn’t seem to notice as he asks you the same question he just repeated to the man standing across from you, now looking flustered.

“Do you, Y/N Y/L/N, take Tommy Randolph to be your husband?”

You look back and forth between Tommy and the officiant, beginning to shake your head. “I- I don’t.”

The ceremony comes to a hushed stop, the wind blowing from the coast can be the only thing heard. “I don’t, and I can’t and I won’t.” The guests look around in awe, not sure of what to do or say.

Your mother and Tommy’s father stand up quickly, both seething with anger, overlapping each other with protests of this “erroneous behavior”. You look at Tommy and begin to smile at his expression, face red with embarrassment and loathe.

“I just can’t.” You begin to look around at all the guests before turning to your right, looking at the faces of your 9 bridesmaids, 2 whom aren’t even trying to hide their shit eating grins. Kiara nods frantically, giving you the ok and Sarah begins to giggle.

With all the approval you need, you take your gown in your hands and begin to flee down the steps. Tommy grips your arm before you can get far and whips you around to face him, “What the fuck do you think you’re doing, Y/N. Do you have any idea what this is gonna cause?” He seethes in your face, teeth clenched together and progressively pressing harder into your skin.

You use all your force and rip yourself away from his grip while walking backwards down the steps. “I’m getting the fuck out of here and far away from you.” Guests are gasping as your mother and Tommy are screaming at you to “get back here” all while Sarah and Kie are giving each other a subtle fist pump.

All you can hear as your running is the sound of your heartbeat and what sounds like JJ, John B and Pope whistling and clapping in approval. “Go get your man, Y/N!”

It all turns into forgotten noise when you finally exit the Island Club and soon all your thoughts are consumed by him. Summers taking cover, splintered back in winters and silent, bitter dinners are all over now. You’re at the starting line, fresh out of the slammer and you did your time.

Breaking out into a sprint, your bridal heels are digging into your feet and your train is tattered, none of it matters when you start the familiar path to Tannyhill. The promise of Rafe at home is the one thing keeping you from collapsing in the Carolina heat with all your extra layers on.

You weren’t much of a runner but 10 minutes doesn’t seem too far when it leads to forever. You can’t help but break into a fit of laughter at the pure chaos of it all, some people passing by in cars honking at you but you just throw your hand up in a fleeting wave.

Rafe is on the second story deck when he sees you stop at the entrance gates, put the passcode in and push through when they open. He squints his eyes in disbelief, knowing this has to be some figment of his imagination, not until he hears you yell his name.

He rushes through his bedroom, down the hallway, stairs and to the front door. Swinging it open not bothering to shut it, he runs out to greet you. You’re both laughing hysterically in disbelief at the sights in front of you.

When you finally reach his grasp, you jump up and he catches you, gripping his hands against your back and thigh. “What did you do?” He exclaims, both out of breath from the adrenaline and running.

You pull back from the embrace and confess it all. “I love you, not him, never him. I- I just couldn’t fathom doing it, not when all I kept thinking about was you standing there at the alter and our house on the Vineyard and dogs and just everything, with you. I want to do everything with you for the rest of my life.”

Rafe eyes become misty and he just nods. “It’s me and you, Y/N. It always has been, I just- wow- you’ve got some nerve running away from your own wedding.” He places a harsh kiss on your forehead and settles you down on the ground but never letting go of your back.

“Are you complaining?” He shakes his head viscerally.“Fuck, no.”

He grabs your face and puts his lips against yours, smiling through the intense kiss you both can’t help but giggle into each other. Pulling away, you both just stare into each other’s eyes, nothing but immense adoration and love.

“How did everyone take it?” He asked still beaming.

You start laughing, throwing your head back “Oh my god, you should’ve seen their faces.” You begin to recount the reactions of Tommy, your mother and his father which makes Rafe smugly hum in approval.

“As much as I wish I could’ve seen that, this is..” You look at him in anticipation.

“This is everything I was hoping would happen.” You laugh at his wishful thinking of this whole wedding becoming a disaster.

“I just couldn’t do it, Rafe. This is my place, right here with you and I’m sorry I didn’t realize it sooner.” Rafe nods and places another kiss to your head.

“You’re here now, with me, and that’s all that matters. I’m not letting you go anytime soon.” You smile and lean in to give him another kiss.

Rafe hums and pulls away. “Now, as much as I enjoy seeing you in a wedding dress, let’s get you into something more comfortable, my bed, maybe?” You laugh and take his hand, guiding him up the front steps of Tannyhill.

“How about you pour us two glasses of celebratory wine and I’ll pull up my “dream home” Pinterest board, just so we can start to brainstorm or something” you shrug coyly, fearing your enthusiasm and excitement got the best of you.

Rafe brings your intertwined hands up to his mouth and places a kiss on your knuckles. “You and your beautiful mind. That sounds perfect to me, sweetheart.”

You enter the doors together, shutting the rest of the world out, just you and him. No way either of you are gonna screw up knowing what’s at stake. Years of labor, locks and ceilings all mean nothing when you look at him, the man of your dreams now escorting you into his room with nothing but you on his mind, even back then, even now and forever.

——————————————

“Now, pretty baby, I’m running back home to you. Fresh out the slammer, I know who my first call will be to”

[c6nrad]

MY BOY ONLY BREAKS

HIS FAVORITE TOYS — R. CAMERON

synopsis — in which rafe cameron and his girlfriend led a fairytale relationship, until he got bored.

❝HE SAW FOREVER SO HE SMASHED IT UP.❞

It started off with infatuation.

Even though you’ve known Rafe since birth, he’s never acknowledged your existence. Not until your senior year.

Suddenly, he bothered to bat his eyes in your direction. He would glare when you laughed with a boy at the country club, for whatever reason you couldn’t seem to understand.

You had no idea why he suddenly became interested in you, why he would suddenly turn up at the most random places you were at.

At the grocery store, he would appear in random aisles, giving you a quick wave that he would’ve never done a few years prior. You reciprocated, not thinking about it a second later.

Rafe would think about that wave as he fell asleep that same night.

The idea of you clouded his mind most the time, his thoughts wandering as he pondered what having you would feel like.

His friends would call it an obsession, the way his eyes followed you and your sundress as you walked across the deck of the country club to your parents.

“She’s gotta watch out, Rafe’s gonna pounce on her any second.” His friends would laugh, forgetting about you two a second later.

He watched you at parties, the way you declined every drink and had fun, sober. It was like a foreign thought for Rafe.

So, he crept closer. He started to inhale you, like a drug better than the cocaine he’d sniff daily. When he’d talk to you, it was like being lifted off the ground and twirled around so much that you’d fall out of dizziness into his arms.

He’d hold you, of course. Get a good whiff of your shampoo, smell your perfume that lingered onto your sweaty body, and caress your leg as you would sit on his lap at parties.

Rafe was high on love. So much so that he didn’t do cocaine for a full week, but in return wanted you by his side for almost that whole duration. He would be a gentlemen to you, opening doors, paying for everything, and taking you wherever you wanted.

“You’re so beautiful.” He would say at a bonfire, away from everyone so they couldn’t see the make out session that was about to occur, but close enough to still hear the muffled music and sounds of people talking.

“You’re so whipped.” You would reply, a sly smile on your face as you leaned in to give him that messy top lip kiss he loves, which would make him lust for you and your touch even more.

The peak of your relationship was the summertime, as Rafe could have you all to himself. Without the distractions of your guy friends as school, you were almost always either at his house or on his boat while he was fishing. Either way, he loved seeing you in a skimpy bikini. But only for him.

You stood between his legs as he sat on the anchored ledge of the Druthers, planting kisses on his neck and he rubbed his hands up and down your body.

A frown landed on your face as you pulled away from him, “Rafe, why are we always on the Druthers?”

“What do you mean?” He asked, looking up at you with a concerned face.

You pouted, crossing your arms and taking a seat on his lap. “It just feels like you’re stealing me away from everyone. Not stealing—I just mean that we’re always… Isolated.”

He sighed, tightening his grip around your waist. “I know princess, but how would we enjoy the sunset every night if we have drunk teenagers in our ears? Besides, does anyone else need to know the things we do? We can do whatever we want on here,” he smirked, his finger running up your bikini strap, “it’s all up to you.”

With that same seductive smile, you were convinced that he was a romantic for whisking you away from your friends each night, but it turned out just be a way to get you all to himself.

You saw a future—a life with him. You two had been dating for almost a year, and there was no way he didn’t think so either. It might’ve been a bit too early, but at some point he saw forever.

It was fine until July Ninth.

You had begged to stay on the island for one night to go to a party with Rafe, and he was still not on board even entering the house. He made you promise to stay by him the whole night, to which you did.

His eyes floated around the whole night, his death grip on your hand getting looser and looser and the night continued. “I’m gonna go to the bathroom, yeah? Go talk to your friends.” He said, dropping your hand and disappearing into the crowd before you could even get a word in.

You had no choice but to mingle around with people you hadn’t talked to in months, the awkwardness steaming though each conversation.

After thirty minutes with no signs of Rafe, you decided to go looking for him around the alcohol and weed smelling house.

To your surprise, Rafe was snorting a line of cocaine. As he looked up, you realized that another girl dared him to do it. Her giggle as he did so was contagious, wrapping her hands around his neck and embracing him as he finished. He mumbled something in her ear, but you couldn’t quite read his lips. As she turned around, a smirk was wide on her face and her cheeks were flaming red.

It was too late when Rafe spotted you staring directly as him, your plastic cup filled with Sprite dented from the tight grip you held on it watching their interaction.

You ran through the crowd as fast as you could, pushing and shoving your way through the sweaty and drunk people as Rafe was close behind you. Or so you thought.

By the time you were hyperventilating outside, Rafe gave up on you halfway through the house and went back to his original place with the other girl.

You felt sick to your stomach. The way Rafe had told you he saw a future with you a week prior to today and decided to throw it all away the second he was going to commit was a classic Rafe move.

“I should’ve fucking known it was a matter of time.” You whispered, collapsing on the grass as you threw your now empty cup onto the porch behind you.

A figure popped out behind you, catching the cup you threw. “Woah. You okay?” Topper Thornton asked, a smile plastered on his face.

“Do I look okay?” You replied, ripping out some grass from the perfectly cut lawn.

“You look… Nevermind. I saw Rafe in there with some girl. Did you guys break up?”

“No. No, Topper! Isn’t that the fucking funny part? We didn’t fucking break up! Last week he was like, all over me. I was all over him. He said that he saw forever with me. Now he wants to smash it all up?” You almost screamed, over exaggerating your hand motions.

“He’s known for this. It’s not your fault, really.” Topper replied in a much calmer voice, most likely in an attempt to calm you down too from causing a scene.

A loud scoff erupted from your angry voice, “You should’ve seen him when he first saw me, like really saw me. It was like he was obsessed with me. I liked it too, is that so bad?”

“No, no. Actually, I don’t fuckin’ know. This is all crazy. I’m gonna go get Rafe, and I’ll tell you if he’s doing anything else insane. ‘kay? Stay here, and don’t do anything stupid.” Topper said frantically, then running back into the house in an effort to search for Rafe.

You plopped back onto the grass, tears swelling at your waterline as you looked at the freshly cut grass. You wanted to rip out more, but you might as well wait to pull out Rafe’s hair.

A few minutes later came a disheveled Rafe and a worried Topper, “He’s here.” Topper sighed behind you.

“Bring him here. I don’t want to turn around.” You said, refusing to look behind yourself.

Topper rolled his eyes and pushed Rafe in front of you. His hair was messy, his cheeks were red, and his nose hairs were layered with a white powder.

“I’m sorry.” Was all he said before sitting down beside you. As he sat, you stood up.

“I can’t even fucking look at you. You destroyed me, Rafe. Everything I have is gone because of you. I don’t wanna know what happened with you and that girl or what you whispered in her ear to make her blush like that, but I can’t be the person you just throw away once you get sick of them. I’m not a toy, Rafe. But clearly I was your favorite one.”

He was silent after that. He couldn’t even look at you.

“Once I fix me and everything you destroyed, you’re gonna miss me.” Was your final words before walking away from him.

After you left, he went back inside.

❝THERE WAS DANGER

IN THE HEAT OF MY TOUCH.❞

[maybankswhore]

chain ’round my neck ’ jj maybank headcanon:

almost every one of the pogue’s knew of your obsession with taylor swift.

every occasion , whether it was getting hooked up to the aux , a bonefire or just a simple hangout at john b’s , you had a taylor swift song just waiting to be played from your many different playlist that was labeled for every different mood.

and every time they’d hear the familiar blonde’s voice , they’d groan. they had heard at least each album over five times against their will.

but they knew she made you happy— and her songs were catchy , especially to pope.

he’d sit right next to you singing his heart out.

when it came time for your birthday , your boyfriend jj knew just what he wanted to do.

the whole chateau was themed with your favorite album of hers— convincing each pogue to dress up in a theme that was their favorite.

he went crazy with the planning , even laying out all the details months in advance.

with hands covering your eyes , jj giggled excitedly as he walked you up to the front door. he had to bite his tongue to stop himself from screaming and ruining the surprise.

he was just so fuckin’ excited to see how happy you’d get.

when everything was revealed , you cried.

seeing everyone in their own little version of taylor ( john b the least done up of them all , but still sporting red swim shorts to represent his favorite song ) made your heart almost burst out of your chest.

jj was like a kid in the candy store as he soaked up your reaction , the streamers and balloons tying everything together perfectly.

“oh my god! you did not , jj! this is so cool , i love you so so much it’s amazing.”

“anything for my girl.”

you had partied your little t–swift heart out all night , absolutely plastered with love and happiness at how dedicated not just your friends had been , but your boyfriend too.

“i have one more surprise for you.” jj mumbled into your ear , finally getting you alone.

“jj! is taylor swift behind this door?” you jokingly laughed , holding his hand softly.

he removed his hands from your eyes and spun you around to face him. you gave him a sweet smile and a look of confusion until something around his neck caught the light , glimmering.

you gasped at the delicate gold chain with your initial laid securely against his chest.

“because you’re the one who really knows me.” he murmured , and grabbed your hand to place it against his heart.

you had swore cartoon hearts were forming out of your eyes looking at him , your stomach bursting with butterflies. his own cheeks rosey at your speechless reaction.

it was the sweetest thing , the sweetest moment , you had ever experienced.

“i love you more than anything else in this world , j.”

“even more than taylor?”

“touchy subject. . .”

[boysssofthemonth]

Cardigan

JJ Maybank Series: Teenage Love Triangle Masterlist

Genre: Angst Warnings: None Words: 1700

JJ makes the biggest mistake of his life, and you have the rest of your life to pay for it.

Vintage tee, brand new phone High heels on cobblestones When you are young, they assume you know nothing Sequined smile, black lipstick Sensual politics When you are young, they assume you know nothing

For much of your life, it had been ingrained that hate was a strong word. It would be best practice to refrain from carelessly applying it to your vocabulary. 

But from a young age you were confronted with life lessons prompting you to learn just how much more weight the word love carried. And without careful consideration, the overuse of the word could wear out its substance. Throwing around the word could do more damage than good. 

Your parents were never the role model for what love was supposed to be - they were everything that it shouldn’t be. 

You were determined to be careful of who you chose to love, and to do so with caution. And most importantly, don’t trust boys who say they love you. 

But, as much as your life was predetermined the same way everybody else’s was. You were young and inexperienced. The road ahead longer than what was behind you. 

An essential part of an individual’s young life is ignorance, and despite the wisdom of those older, the best way to learn a lesson is through exposure. 

Your biggest life lesson?

JJ. 

Your history dated back in elementary school but your first actual interaction did not occur until freshman year in highschool. You spent your childhood shying away from the crowd, and JJ had his friends. He always had friends. 

But the world was your oyster, and in freshman year, your life changed when JJ sat beside you one lunch time - which continued on for the next few years. JJ with his big toothy grin, sharp comebacks and boyish appearance. Who could not fall in love with his charming personality?

Eventually you became that duo and the school was well aware of your relationship. There no longer was a Y/n and no longer a JJ. It became Y/n and JJ. 

Where’s Y/n? Probably with JJ.

I’m gonna invite JJ to the party. Y/n will probably come too.

It began romantically - but messy - just as every high school love story goes. When your inexperiences catch up to you, and you both come to an understanding that being in a relationship wasn’t just holding hands and being seen around each other or calling each other cute names. 

A relationship was a bond, requiring commitment and change. There was now a link between two individuals and through life's greatest challenges, you were to stand strong together. 

But JJ was young, and she was always there.

But I knew you Dancin' in your Levi's Drunk under a streetlight, I I knew you Hand under my sweatshirt Baby, kiss it better, I

You and JJ came up against many trials that were critical to the development of both your individual selves but also your relationship. Your love and fondness of each other blossomed like an elegant rose, envied by others for its beauty and passion. A love overflowing with romance and childish dreams.

Your time was well spent in each others company and you shared many firsts. Like the much anticipated first kiss, first dance, first party, first drink. The firsts for everything was with JJ. And throughout it all he was caring and understanding.

JJ showed you what love was and could be. He was the role model that you needed growing up to show you how to be loved.

But JJ was also surrounded by all his friends. Everybody that he loved.

And when I felt like I was an old cardigan Under someone's bed You put me on and said I was your favorite

When family ties loosened and friendships failed. JJ became the one constant in your life, readily available whenever you needed him. 

When you felt unsafe in your own home, you found solace in JJ. He provided you a home in his heart, the same as you providing him a place in your heart. Nobody could understand the pain you were going through the way JJ did. In a way, you both lived similar lives - having parents who were never really there. 

When you felt like you were another hole in the wall, ignored but a silent burden, JJ patched you up and made you feel beautiful again. 

He would always, without ever a single doubt, pick you,

That’s what you thought, anyway. 

A friend to all is a friend to none Chase two girls, lose the one When you are young, they assume you know nothing

Your first warning from the very beginning should have been his kindness. 

JJ was the life of the party and was constantly surrounded by people. But your entire relationship he showed up, and his loyalty never once wavered. 

But you were seventeen, and everybody tells you that you’re too young and naive. Too immature. Life throws you obstacles so that you can learn from them.

First loves never last, but their impact will remain throughout the rest of your life. 

She was always there too. Sharing laughter, attending the parties, going to the school dances, riding out the waves of life the same as you and JJ. And JJ was kind to everyone, so JJ was kind to her.

But I knew you, Playing hide and seek and Giving me your weekends, I I knew you Your heartbeat on the High Line Once in twenty lifetimes, I

Roses are beautiful, they signify love and passion. But with everything beautiful, a dark side is concealed until eventually something forces it to come out of hiding. 

The signs became clearer and the thorns became sharper. 

She was only supposed to be a friend - that’s what he assured you - and you were supposed to understand. But she became a more frequent character in your life. 

You were the old cardigan again, shoved under the bed, no longer remembered. She was new, the latest style and perfect proportions. Only you could dream to be like her. 

All it took was one summer away from Kildare, away from JJ, to change everything. 

To kiss in cars and downtown bars Was all we needed You drew stars around my scars But now I'm bleedin'

You reminisce on the days being with JJ. How love made you feel. How JJ himself made you feel.

Running around town, not giving a care in the world. It was you and him, against everybody else.

Trying out all the new cafes, ordering new items that you both had never tried before, and JJ offering you his drink if you didn't like your choice.

Competing on regular bowling dates, with JJ never giving you the chance to beat him (that's just his nature, JJ always had to win). But making it up to you by buying whatever you wanted at the ice cream store.

Reading your favorite book and JJ taking the time out of his day to listen to your review, providing you with just the right amount of responses so that you knew he was really listening.

Watching tv shows together, laughing at the corny jokes, gagging at the love scenes. But also seeing your love portrayed in the films you watched.

If he had just been with you, maybe she would have never had the chance.

When it returns to your mind, the wounds that never healed are reopened and you are reminded of your loss. You lost your love, guardian and believer.

The one who could console you in your darkest days.

JJ had you believe that no other man, besides your father, could harm you. But they were lies, because the very boy that those words came out from, was the very same boy that hurt you. The wounds much more painful and deeper than your fathers. Because at least you grew up not knowing any better, that was your father and it was expected.

But JJ? He tricked you. He made you believe that he would always protect you.

'Cause I knew you Steppin' on the last train Marked me like a bloodstain, I I knew you

JJ’s disloyalty was the cause of the end of your relationship, but more than that, his treatment towards you as the relationship began to crash down. He chose that road, filled with lies, betrayal and dishonesty. He chose a life that he could not come back from when he willingly put her above you.

JJ proved to you that he was just a boy and you had more self-respect than to stay with a boy. You learnt first hand from your own mother what staying could do. 

Tried to change the ending Peter losing Wendy, I I knew you

You loved JJ, and love was enough for you to allow JJ into your heart in the first place. Although it did take some time. But you opened up to him. Nevertheless, deep down, you were aware of the dangerous path you had chosen for yourself. 

You knew the risks of getting involved with a boy, and that first relationships usually never last. But despite that, you gave him a chance. 

JJ was young and he was a boy still navigating life blindly. He was disappointed in himself, and ashamed of what he had done. 

The moment he found out that you knew what happened, he was quick to apologise, and begged you to forgive him.

You could see it in his eyes, the regret and shame. You knew this would have a lasting impact on him. But his mistakes were irreversible.

Leavin' like a father Running like water, I And when you are young, they assume you know nothing

The betrayal stained you, like red wine on a white dress. 

You reminded yourself that life was filled with lessons, and this was just a part of that, but the hurt remained a constant in your life. 

JJ promised you many things, but he had other plans. 

You were used to people entering and leaving your life, but this hurt the most.

But I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss I knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs The smell of smoke would hang around this long 'Cause I knew everything when I was young I knew I'd curse you for the longest time Chasin' shadows in the grocery line I knew you'd miss me once the thrill expired And you'd be standin' in my front porch light And I knew you'd come back to me You'd come back to me And you'd com*e back to me And you'd come back

Despite the break up, JJ was still there, haunting you at every corner of your life. 

You explored the town together and now every lamp post and every ice cream store were just reminders of his betrayal. Of everything that you lost. Every book you read had never felt the same again. 

You knew that you had to endure this pain endlessly, and your love for JJ, in spite of the circumstances, would never waver. 

But you were angry. Angry and shameful. 

Angry at JJ for what he did, lying to you and proposing empty promises. 

You felt shameful, that you allowed a boy to get so close to you and grant him the power to hurt you tremendously. Because all along you knew things could never stay blissful, but you still allowed him access to your heart and rip it apart. Leaving you with nothing but broken promises, tears of blood and a wilted rose. 

But he came back, knocking on your door, begging to be let in again and show you that love did exist in the midst of his infidelity. 

But how could you let him in again?

Taglist: @fals3-g0d

[featherandferns]

pirates (fic)

jj maybank x fem!reader | shamelessly and obviously inspired by taylor swift's 'seven'

content warning: mentions of abuse (physical)

word count: 9k. roughly

blurb: if you ever needed to find yourself or jj maybank, one would recommend you head to pirate's cove, no matter the age or day.

The water was tepid. There was some lingering woodsy fragrance, probably from the cedar trees that towered high all around the waterside, alongside something undeniably fresh in the air. JJ waded in the murky water. The ground was warm with sunlight that flitted through the canopy of trees. As it illuminated the leaves, there was a strange greenish hue that overcame everything. The water plants and reeds only added to it, making the place feel peaceful and serene. In one hand he held a net, and another a bucket. JJ was searching for frogs. His father had told him it was season for them and JJ had taken that as his summer-break mission.

There was a ripple in the water and something that wasn’t short of a ‘splash’, and JJ spun around in time to see a frog leap from the water and onto a moss-covered rock. He grinned.

“Got ya,” he muttered to himself.

Slowly, carefully, he approached. Net at the ready, he continued to ease towards it. ‘Slowly now, JJ’, he told himself. ‘Slowly’.

A sudden scream ripped through the trees.

The frog leaped away for safety and JJ, in the fright of it all, stumbled backwards and tumbled into the water. It came up to his shoulders, his tiny body almost fully submerged, and he swore out like he had heard his father do. Somehow, it made him feel slightly better. Before he could get to his feet, the scream came again. It sounded high, but there was no telling if it was girl or boy. It was probably somebody playing around. He rolled his eyes, frog now gone, and got to his feet. Just as he went to get back to frog spotting, he heard it again. Only, this time:

“Help!”

His head spun around to where it came from. That didn’t sound like no joking. He waded out the water as quick as he could, feeling as if it were pulling at his legs to keep him from land. Managing onto dry ground, he looked around through the thick forestry for where it came from.

“Come on,” he mumbled to himself. His little legs were a little scratched up from the rocks and dirt he’d fallen on in the water. As the air got to the tiny cuts, making them sting.

The scream came again, this time louder and more panicked. JJ started off in the direction of it, ditching his bucket but holding onto his net. He raced towards the sound, perfecting his course with each one that came, until he stopped at a bank.

There stood a girl on a mud bank.

You couldn’t have been older than seven. You were surrounded by marsh water. Hair falling around your shoulders as if the sea had churned you up and spat you out. Your cheeks were wet and eyes wide, focused on something below in the water.

JJ squinted as he tried to focus. Driftwood?

The wood shifted closer to the bank and you opened your mouth in a screech.

“Gator,” JJ said.

Your head darted up at the sound. You locked eyes with JJ. More tears came.

“Help me!” you cried. “Please!”

JJ looked around. Where was his dad? Wasn’t there somebody else here? Could nobody else hear you hollering like someone being murdered out in daylight?

“It’s getting closer!” you wailed. JJ watched the gator slowly slink towards you, as if taunting.

“Okay, okay,” he said, nodding. “Lemme think, alright? You’re gonna be fine.”

“Hurry,” you continued to sob.

JJ’s young mind was racing. He thought back to his mother’s lessons when they were sat out in the sun the other week. Snakes don’t like dogs and gators don’t like noise? Was that it? He looked down at the net in his hand. It was a long stick, at least half his height. If he were to disturb the water and yell, maybe it’d change course? That’d give you enough time, perhaps?

“Alright,” he said, voice trembling. He looked to you again and, as if you could feel his gaze, you looked up from the gator. Clearing his throat, he tried to make his tone more demanding like his pops. “Alright, here’s what I’m gonna do. I’m gonna try and distract him over here, and you’re gonna make a run for this here bank.”

“What?” you gaped. “I…I can’t do that!”

“You gotta! Run as fast as you can, alright! Keep running that way, back to the houses,” JJ instructed, pointing to his right. Your lip trembled. “You can do it, alright? I’m gonna be right behind ya.”

You stared at him. Looking back down at the gator, you seemed to consider his plan. Then, meeting his eyes again, you pursed your lips, sniffled, and nodded.

“Okay.”

“Okay,” JJ said, nodding himself. He swallowed his fear, squared his shoulders, and moved to the left of the bank. Grabbing another large branch, struggling only slightly with the weight, he took a deep breath. Then, splashing the water as hard as he could, he began to yell. “Come here gator! Come on!”

The moment the gator turned; you took off running. Your small body met the water and you started to swim as fast you could. JJ hit the water harder now, yelling louder.

“Come on gator boy! Come on!”

The frantic splashes of your front stroke seemed to catch the gator’s attention more so. You weren't looking behind you, eyes focused on the land.

“Come on! Come for me!” JJ practically pleaded.

The gator stayed still a moment. Then, slowly, began to sulk towards JJ.

His victory and smile were only brief, as his prepubescent brain caught onto the fact that a gator was making way to him.

Glancing to you, he saw you crawling onto the land, coughing and panting. You began to race towards the houses, just as JJ has instructed. Following suite, he ditched his net and branch and took off after you.

“Keep going!” he hollered. “Keep going!”

The pair of you ran and ran and ran. You ran until you were out of the marsh, out the of the clearing of the trees, and out onto the main street of the neighbourhood you were in. You finally stumbled to a slow, and eventually a stop. JJ copied. The two of you hunched over, panting heavily, hands on knees.

“Oh my God,” you whispered to yourself.

JJ felt as if he couldn’t get enough air in his lungs. It certainly didn’t help when you flung yourself at him, arms wrapping around his neck.

“Thank you!” you cried.

It took a moment for him to react. Then, he wrapped his scrawny arms around your frame.

“Hey, hey,” he coaxed, rubbing your back like his mom did with him when he was poorly. “You’re alright now.”

You nodded against him but continued to cry, nonetheless.

“I thought I was dinner for a second,” you laughed sadly. JJ chuckled too.

“You scared off my frogs,” he told you. You laughed harder, untangling yourself from him.

“Sorry,” you said, wiping your cheeks.

“What were you doing on that bank, anyway?” JJ asked.

You looked down at her feet nervously, almost embarrassed.

“There was this real pretty butterfly on there and…I just wanted a closer look.”

“Don’t nobody tell you that’s gator land?” JJ said. You looked back up to him and shook your head.

“No! I just…I wasn’t thinking!” you replied, becoming tearful again.

JJ reeled himself in.

“It’s alright,” he said. “It gets confusing out there.”

You smiled tentatively and nodded. Sniffling once more, you stuck out a hand and introduced yourself.

JJ took it and gave it a shake like he’d seen adults do at school and his daddy’s work. “JJ.”

“Nice to meet you, JJ.”

“Nice to meet you too.”

You both stood a moment and smiled at one another. “I’m sorry about your net.”

“It’s alright. Had it for ages.��

“I can get you a new one,” you told him. Then, as if a light bulb had gone off, you said, “I have a spare one I think!”

JJ hesitated. His mom had told him not to be greedy of people. ‘We don’t take charity, JJ.’

“You don’t have to,” he hesitated.

You shook your head firmly and took one of his hands in yours. You began to drag him as you set off walking down the road.

“Yes, I do. You saved my life, after all.”

JJ couldn’t really argue with that logic. Hand in hand, the two of you walked to your house. As you went, you asked about the frogs. JJ told you as much as he could remember reading. There was a picture book in school about them with a few easy-to-read facts put here and there. It was far more interesting than the maths the teacher had been going on about, so he’d read it under his desk. You nodded along and listened fervently. At some part on the walk, you'd started playing frogs. Ribbiting and hopping around, even playing leapfrog. Eventually, you came to your house.

JJ paused as you started walking up to it. When you noticed he was no longer by your side, you turned around.

“What?” you asked.

“It’s just…I live just down the road there,” JJ said, pointing. “Near the water.”

Your smile came back, wide and pure. “No way!”

He smiled back. “Yeah!”

You raced over and grabbed his hand, pulling him around the back, to the shed.

“We’re gonna be best friends!” you cheered, making JJ laugh.

He didn’t hate the sound of that. Making friends at school hadn’t been all that successful. There was only one boy who he truly got on well with, and he was called John B. JJ wasn’t sure why his name was John B, but then again he wasn’t completely sure why everyone called him JJ. He liked your name. It was different, a bit like you.

You came to the shed and pulled it open. Going through the tools and such, you dug about until you found a spare net buried amongst spider webs near the back.

“I knew it!” you triumphed, holding it up. Walking over to JJ who stood out in the late afternoon sun in her garden, you stopped before him. “Kneel.”

JJ did as demanded.

Tapping him on each shoulder, you announced with a laugh, “I now pronounce you sir knight JJ…Uh, what’s your last name?”

“Maybank.”

“Sir knight JJ Maybank!” you said, loud and proud.

JJ giggled as he got to his feet, giving a bow. He then began to wave like he’d seen the English queen do on TV once. You began to applaud and cheer, pretending to bow to him like he was Jesus walking into town on palm Sunday.

Someone called your name. "Is that you?” a voice called from the house.

The pair of you turned to see a woman stood on the patio, using her hand to keep the sun from her eyes.

“Yeah, ma!”

“Come on in! Dinner’s nearly ready!” She called.

You nodded and looked to JJ. You handed him the net.

“What’re you doing tomorrow?”

“Nothing, I don’t think,” JJ replied.

“Want to play pirates?”

“Sure,” he said, not fully sure what pirates involved but very interested, nonetheless. Maybe he could see if John B was free too. The three of you might make good ruffians.

“Okay,” you grinned. You flung your arms around his neck again before racing towards your house. As you went, you called out your farewell to him.

“Smell you later, Maybank.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*

The creek had quickly become the usual haunt of JJ and yourself. It was a little bit from the waters near his house, more secluded by forestry, though not as much as the marsh. You still got twitchy about going in there after the alligator incident. JJ couldn’t really blame you. The thing would’ve eaten you in one bite.

You'd found a small nook of fresh water, deep enough to swim. There was a rope swing tethered to a branch which made your secret spot feel only slightly spoiled, under the notion that someone else had gotten there first. Never the matter, every time you went, it was empty. Your whoops and hollers, and the narrative of whatever make-believe game you had come up to play, filled the air. It probably carried through to JJ’s house, which was nearest the spot that only JJ and you knew.

“Ahoy!” you growled, jumping out from behind a bush. “Gimme your gold and nobody gets hurt.”

“If I’m getting hurt then there’s gonna be two funerals!” JJ returned loudly as he unsheathed his sword.

You advanced forward with yours, already posed for fight. JJ slashed in return and the two of you heard the clink of metal hitting metal. You swung and sparred, dancing around the bank of the water. Bare feet treaded over pine needles and rotting, fallen leaves, damp from the water from when the rain pushed the level to rise yesterday.

Gasping, you ducked to avoid a deadly swing of JJ’s sword to your head.

“You’re gonna regret that, matey!” you threatened, and with that, drove him into the water. Before you could break free, JJ was pulling you in with him, and the two of you became submerged.

The water was cold. The continuous flow of it meant there was no time for the sun to heat it, least of all through the leaves above them. There was only one break in the trees where you could see the blue sky fully. You broke to the surface first, then JJ. The two of you were grinning as they clambered to your feet. The water came up to your waists, though only to your parent’s middle thighs most probably. Not that your parents knew their spot. This was sacred ground. When you'd found it, you had demanded that JJ keep it a secret.

“Cross your heart, won’t tell no other,” you'd said. JJ did as you asked and you grinned that same carefree grin as you copied. JJ was still warming up to ask youif John B could join. As the summer had gone on, he’d become closer and closer to Big John’s successor.

“You’ll never find me gold!” JJ announced, holding his sword above his head with one arm. “It dies with me!”

“As will I!” you countered loudly.

Another battle, bloodier than ever, and JJ ended up on his back on the wet bank, dripping from head to toe. His t-shirt was drenched, sticking to his sun-kissed skin, and you stood over him in your sopping blue summer dress. Your skin sparkled with the sheen of the water under the sunlight. It was as if the heavens were blessing you.

Your sword’s tip met his chin, driving his head backwards and up.

“Any last words, Maybank? Your crew is nowhere in sight,” you snarled.

JJ grinned. “Kiss my ass.”

You couldn’t help but gasp out a laugh. Taking advantage, JJ batted the sword off of him and drove his into your chest in one fluid motion. You stumbled backwards with another gasp, this time more dramatic. Holding the handle of the sword, you gently pulled it from her chest.

“You’ll rue this day,” you warned weakly.

Then, you tumbled backwards into the water to meet your untimely demise.

A hand searched for your arm and wrapped around your bicep, pulling you up to sit.

“What does ‘rue’ mean?” JJ asked you.

You sat in the water.

“I don’t know,” youreplied. “I just heard them say it in a movie once.”

“Hm,” JJ thought.

He sat himself beside you. You were no longer pirates battling over treasure. Instead, you were best friends for the summer. At that age, of seven-turning-eight, friendships come fast and easy. All what matters is if you’re any good at gallivanting and sword fighting, or running secret missions against the Russians and English, or racing from one house to another. Not what clothes you wear or how much money you have, or if you’re a kook or a pogue.

“I should probably go home soon,” JJ said. The sun was getting crisper, more orange, warning of dusk.

“You could stay for dinner at our house if you like,” you offered.

JJ thought it over. “I’d have to ask my parents.”

“Okay. I can come with you, if you like.”

“That’s alright,” JJ said. He got to his feet and you got to yours. “Come on.”

The two of you made their way out of the hiding spot and back into real life. A slight shiver had begun to run up your back now that you weren’t racing around in battle. It was a chillier night. You came to JJ’s house first. He hesitated as he looked up at the door. There was a faint ruckus coming from inside. You stood beside him and stared up. He’d been in your house plenty of times, but you’d never been in his. Come to think, you'd never met his parents.

“You gonna ask?” you wondered.

JJ didn’t look at you as he nodded. His eyes remained focused on the door.

“Yeah. Just…wait here a moment,” he said quietly.

JJ approached the house and made his way up the porch steps slowly, then opened the shutter. To the back door he went. He took a breath before pushing it open and walked into his home.

You stood in the garden and waited.

The ruckus was getting louder and it began to sound like voices, shouting. A woman and a man. There was the sound of something being shoved, maybe a table, and then a loud smash of a plate. You gasped and felt your heart begin to pick up. This wasn’t the same sort of heartbeat as when you were battling JJ on the water banks. This was true fear. The type you'd felt when you were face to face with the gator. It only seemed to speed up the louder the hollering got.

“Leave her alone!” you heard JJ’s young voice yell.

A crisp, clean noise echoed in your ears.

Skin hitting skin.

JJ’s unmistakeable screech.

You couldn’t stop yourself from taking flight. You raced to your house, up the street.

~*~*~*~*~*~*

There was the sound of something tapping. It wasn’t a regular tapping, like a leaky drain dripping outside. It came and went for ages, then again, maybe louder or quieter. You groaned and tucked your head under her duvet, hoping it would pass. It wouldn’t. You tossed your sheet off and flicked on your lamp. Staring to the window, you waited for it to come again. For a long while, it didn’t. Then: clink.

“Are you joking me?” you mumbled sleepily, getting up. You trudged to the window and pulled up your blind. It was dark outside. The sound of crickets and a distant owl hooting was the only sound you were met with when you pushed the window up and open. Looking around, there was nothing save for your back garden.

“Psst!”

You frowned and looked down. There stood JJ. He was in his pyjamas, barefoot.

“JJ?”

He replied with your name as if checking, nervous. You heard him sniffle.

“What are you doing? It’s really late,” you yawned, rubbing your eyes to help them adjust.

JJ rubbed his arm.

“I know,” he said. “I’m sorry.”

“Are you okay?” you asked, trying to keep your voice to a whisper. JJ looked up at you again and now, with your eyes adjusted, you could make out tear streaks.

“Can I sleep over, do you think?”

Glancing briefly to your bedroom door, you wondered what your parents might say. They liked JJ for the most part. He was polite when he came around. They knew he made a good friend for their daughter. Besides, it was the summer break. Why couldn’t you have a sleepover? You looked back down to him and nodded.

“Can you climb up?”

You lived in a lodge, the same as most of the people on the cut. It was elevated from the ground by a meter or more. JJ nervously eyed up the wall before shaking his head.

“Do you have a rope or something?”

You turned around and searched your room. You could tie together your bedsheets and blankets, like they did in the movies. No, that wouldn’t work.

“Ah,” you said.

You spotted a skipping rope hung up on the back of your bedroom door. Grabbing it, you came back to the window and lowered it down. JJ wasn’t particularly large. You were the same height and nearly the same weight. His shoulders were a little broader and his legs a little longer, but save for that, you were equals. You believed you might be able to tug him up.

“Grab on.”

JJ began to climb up the wall, using your rope to help. You struggled as you held it steady, managing his weight only just. He came to the windowsill and got a grip, clambering in. You helped him step down into your room. In the full light of your bedroom, you could make out his running tears. On his left cheek was a bright pink mark, almost the perfect shape of a hand.

“Oh JJ,” you mumbled.

That only seemed to make him cry more. You quickly wrapped her arms around him in a hug. It made you feel better to be hugged whenever you scraped your knee or fell off your bike. JJ hugged you back, crying into your shoulder.

“I’m sorry,” he wailed, voice small and fragile like a fixed China plate.

“You don’t gotta be sorry,” you told him quietly.

When JJ had cried most of his tears, you pulled away and closed your window. JJ made his way to your bed, burying himself under the pink and orange duvet. He mumbled something about his head hurting. You closed the blinds, climbed in too, turning off your lamp. You tucked your white childhood bear, named August bear, under one arm.

You lay in silence for a moment. This was different to the other sleepover you'd been to. You'd only been to one, for a girl classmate’s birthday. The other girls and you had spent all night whispering, giggling about anything and everything. The birthday girl’s mom had shushed you several times. Here, all there could be to hear was JJ’s shaking breaths and occasionally sniffs.

“JJ?” you whispered. It was dark now and you couldn’t make out his face.

“Yeah?” he whispered back.

“Can I tell you something?”

“Yeah.”

“I think…I think your house is haunted,” you told him quietly.

JJ sniffed. “Why’s that?”

“Well, your dad’s always mad,” you explained in a hush. “I think something in there takes control of him and…the ghosts are messing with you all.”

JJ’s face was slowly coming into view. His pale skin and blue eyes. Thin lips, still trembling, and nose redden from crying. “You think so?”

“Mhm,” you said.

You found his hand under the blanket and clasped it tightly.

“I think you should come live with me and…and we can be pirates, and sleep at sea, out in the secret spot, and never have to answer to anyone ever again. We won’t have to go to school when summer ends. And you won’t have to hide anymore.”

“That sounds nice,” JJ yawned.

Contagiously, you yawned too. “Yeah. It does.”

Closing your eyes, you felt herself beginning to drift off once more. Your hand remained enclosed around JJ’s. A strong grip, tight like a bowline knot. Then, JJ whispered your name.

“Mhm?”

“Thanks.”

“Anytime, smelly,” you hummed.

~*~*~*~*~*

A tapping at the door came. Three rhythmic knocks. Your face lit up and you got up from the breakfast table to answer it.

“Coming!” you called. You'd grown a little over the last school year and didn’t need to go on your tiptoes no more to open the door. On the other side stood JJ, smiling.

"Morning smelly!"

“Morning,” he said. He walked into the now familiar house. Two years of friendship meant he had become a local in your household. “Did I miss breakfast?”

“Nope,” you said, walking to the table with him.

“Morning JJ,” your mom said. She plated him up two pancakes and handed him the syrup as he took the spare seat around the table.

“Morning,” JJ said politely. He was always polite to your parents.

Your dad sat to the left, saying a hi behind the paper. He came alive in the afternoons. Your mom rubbed her swollen belly. JJ had never seen a pregnant woman before. At first, he was worried an alien was growing inside of her. When he told you that, you nearly died with laughter. It wasn’t the greatest feeling to be on the receiving end.

“What’re you kids plans for the day, then?” your mom asked as she took her seat.

“We might go fishing,” JJ said, lathering his pancakes. “There’s some good spots near the marsh.”

“Not the marsh,” you said. Still afraid of the gators, even after two years.

JJ rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, you gotta be careful of them gators,” he told you. He grinned as he lent over to steal a slice of bacon off your place. “They might bite!”

“Hey!” you complained, shoving him in the shoulder.

“Easy you two,” your mom chuckled. “What about John B? He coming with?”

“Maybe. We could go by his and ask,” JJ said to you. You nodded.

Your twosome became a threesome towards the end of the first summer. After playing pirates for the majority of your break, they had decided to invite John B to join. Your friendship with JJ was already set in stone (with him sleeping over almost every other night, though neither of you spoke about why), but considering you went to a different school to them both (a Catholic joint for girls only), your friendship with John B had mostly blossomed at the weekends or in the evenings after school like moonflower. Winter was filled playing games mostly inside, and spring in the grass largely. But now summer was back, school done with, and at the age of nine, there was little else more important than fishing, swimming and playing pretend in the wake.

The two of you polished off your breakfast and you finished getting dressed. Then, out you headed on your pushbikes. You stopped by John B’s, said hi to his dad, JJ stealing another slice of toast in the process, and then your trio went off to the jetty with the promise of being safe. John B had learnt how to drive his dad’s boat, so long as you stayed within a certain area, and JJ was becoming a natural fisher like his dad. You made yourself useful in anyway that you could. It seemed your blessing was swimming. You were strong in the water, could hold your breath the longest. You had taught JJ how to backflip off the jetty.

“I caught one!” JJ hollered. He tugged on the rod, struggling a moment. Reeling in a fish, he whooped loudly. It wasn’t exactly large but compared to the three nine-year-olds, anything was a marlin.

You did a little victory dance.

“Think we could have it for dinner?” John B wondered. His brown hair blew around in the summer breeze.

You pinched the still wiggling fish off the rod and dangled it in John B’s face. He cringed and scrambled away.

“Gross!”

You laughed like a mad man and then tossed it back in the water.

JJ whined. your name in complaint.

“What!? That thing wasn’t good enough to eat,” you said.

“I could’ve used it for bait,” JJ said.

“Oh,” you went meek. “Sorry.”

JJ kept his forlorn expression a moment longer as he got to his feet.

“You’re gonna be!”

With that, he pushed you in the water. You gave out a small squeal as you tumbled in. Before you hit the surface, you heard JJ’s mad laughter. An idea popped into your head. You broke to the surface, gasping for air and thrashing like you'd seen a guy do on TV.

“Help!” you gargled.

JJ panicked, leaning over and calling your name.

You kept your hands above you, splashing around. JJ tried to grab onto you. The moment you felt his hand in yours, a wicked grin came to your face, and you tugged him in too. When he came to the surface, you were cackling away, treading water comfortably as if going on a brisk jog.

“Hilarious,” he muttered, splashing at you. You splashed him back.

John B muttered something snidey about third-wheeling, and JJ and yourself shared a look. One nod then another, and the two pirates were hijacking the ship and pulling the third of their gang into the water too.

After swimming around for what felt like hours, the three of you clambered back into the small rowboat. Cheeks aching from laughter and chests heaving, you collapsed onto your backs. You grinned up at the sky. You wanted forever to feel this way. Lungs full, heart light, mind empty.

And hey - why couldn’t you?

~*~*~*~*~*

On his way back from school, JJ heard your laughter from your garden. He could recognise that sound anywhere. Walking over to your house, through to the back yard, he saw you sat on the porch steps. Your dad was sat with you, blowing bubbles in front of you both. The moment JJ came into sight, you were sitting up straighter, waving.

“I like your cap, smelly,” you said as he approached, nodding to his head.

JJ grinned and took it off. Placing it on your head, pushing down on the lip so it fell over your face, he said, “got it from my dad.”

“Nice,” you giggled, correcting it.

JJ smiled down at you. He was taller than you now, by a couple of inches.

It felt as though he had recently realised you were a girl. It sounded stupid, because JJ knew that you'd always been a girl, but when you were playing out it never seemed to matter. You were a good pirate nemesis and a decent fisher, and always up for a laugh. But in the latest school year, the girls had started whispering about the boys, nervously asking them to hold hands around the playground, playing kiss tag during lunch break. JJ and John B never got involved. They’d sit back and watch from a branch in a tree, talking about surfing. JJ was itching to try it out. His dad always raved about the waves.

You had nice hair though. Sun-stained skin and strawberry kissed lips. Your colourful eyes were squinting against the sun.

JJ stole back his cap and cleared his throat awkwardly, trying to distract his wandering thoughts.

“Wanna go get John B and head to the cove?” he wondered.

You turned and asked your dad. The answer was yes, so long as you were back before dark. With that, the two of you set off to John B’s place. JJ bumped your shoulder as you walked. You talked about school and your peers. Told stories about the fights that had broken out on the school yard. You complained about your school's mandatory summer dress's and the lack of good jello flavours in the canteen. JJ complained about only catching small fish and nothing big enough to fry.

When you went to retrieve John B, he complained that he was tired, and didn’t feel up to coming out. Walking to the pirates cove, JJ and you complained about John B not coming out to play when you hadn’t seen him in five days.

“He’s so lame,” you muttered, kicking a stone.

“What an asshole.”

“I don’t think he’s an asshole,” you said to JJ. “Sides, you shouldn’t say things like that.”

JJ shrugged. “My dad says it all the time.”

You eyed his side profile. “How are things, with your dad?”

JJ shoved his hands in his short pockets and shrugged again, watching his feet as you kept walking. “Fine.”

“He do anything lately? To you, I mean?”

He sniffed and looked the opposite way to you, at the houses. “What’s it matter?”

“Well…” You weren’t sure how to answer that. You sighed and conceded. “I guess it doesn’t.”

The rest of the walk to pirate cove was quiet. JJ felt badly and he wanted to apologise, though there wasn’t anything specific to apologise for. There was just a feeling itching at him that he’d upset you. As you came to the clearing which led to the cove, he stopped. You followed suit, watching him.

“Race?” he offered, giving you a small smile.

You grinned.

“Bring it.”

A countdown, feet poised and at the ready, and you were off. JJ stumbled over a tree root as he ran, making you laugh. You ran and ran until you got to the cove. There, panting, you had to accept defeat. JJ’s hand slapped the tree in victory.

“First!” he cheered.

You laughed.

“Best two out of three?” you wondered.

JJ eyed up where you stood, on the edge of the jump where the rope swing had been made. There was a small drop into the deeper part of the water. He grinned.

“Nah.”

Shoving you on the collarbones, you let out a screech as fell into the water. When you came to the surface, you were yelling all sorts of things at him. JJ knew you weren't really angry.

“Asshole!” you hollered.

JJ barked out a laugh.

“You said it!”

“Screw you!” you returned, making him laugh harder.

You swam to shore and unsheathed your sword. It was a little rusted from want of use, with school disrupting your battle. The older the two of you got, the more unnatural it was starting to feel to wield it. You raised it in threat of war. JJ raised a brow. Doing the same, he pulled out his own sword. Recently sharpened.

“You’re gonna regret that, Captain Maybank,” you said in a croaky voice.

“Argh,” JJ countered, advancing to you with his sword extended. “We’ll just have to see.”

The battle was bloody and brief. Though out of practise, you triumphed, with JJ dead on the dirt bank once more. Winning the fight, the map died with him, and thus the treasure. Upon realising this, you cried out a long, dramatic ‘noooo!’, dropping to your knees before falling flat on the dirt beside your defeated foe.

As you caught your breath, your smiles slowly fading, you watched the sky above. You'd fallen on the perfect spot where you could see it through the trees. Sun now lower, the days shorter thanks to fall, you sighed and folded your arms behind your head. JJ did the same.

“Hey. Can I ask you something?” JJ wondered.

“Yeah, course.”

“Have you had your first kiss yet?”

You kept watching the sky. A bird flew by, merely a dark spec.

“No,” you said. “I mean, I go to an all-girls school, remember? Not many guys to be kissing.”

“You could kiss a girl.”

“I don’t know,” you said. “Not sure if I wanna. Kiss a girl, that is.”

JJ nodded against the floor. He sighed and watched the leaves rustle in the breeze. A few fell.

“Have you had your first kiss?”

“No,” JJ admitted. Somewhat bashful and somewhat proud, he told you, “this girl Becky wanted to kiss me.”

“She did?”

“Mhm. But I didn’t feel like it.”

That was a lie. Ten year-old JJ was nervous as hell. Scared, even. He’d laughed it off with John B, was perhaps a little mean to Becky in the process, but she didn’t ask again. That was on Tuesday.

“What do you think it’s like?” you wondered. “I mean, they do it all the time in the movies.”

“Not sure,” JJ frowned. “Maybe wet?”

“Ew,” you laughed, snorting. You sat up and dusted the pine needles and dirt off your wet arms. They were already drying off. You looked down at him. His grey t-shirt was stained with dirt and dust. The red cap on his head sat funny, having been shifted since he laid down.

“We could always kiss,” you said.

JJ’s eyes darted to you.

“We could?”

“Why not?” you shrugged. You fiddled your fingers. “You and John B are the only boys I know.”

“Then why don’t you kiss John B?” JJ asked you, sitting up too.

You shrugged, looking to the water. “Just…don’t wanna.”

JJ considered your offer. He took you in as you watched the creek. Slightly imperfect features, sun-kissed cheeks, faintly rosy from running and playing. He’d rather kiss you than anybody else.

“Okay,” he said. You turned your head to face him.

“Okay.”

The two of you nervously giggled, then shifted around awkwardly. Somehow, you both ended up on your knees, facing one another. You had your hands clenched in little fists on your thighs. JJ had his buried in his short pockets. You stared at one another for a long minute, then slowly, nervously, leaned towards each other. You closed your eyes and JJ supposed he should do the same. That’s what they did in the films, after all. A gap, a falter, and then your lips clumsily met. It wasn’t a quick peck like JJ saw the other kids doing at school during kiss-tag. It also wasn’t long or passionate, like in the films. It just sort of…was. You pulled away first.

JJ opened his eyes just before you opened yours. His face was bright pink. You snorted before laughing altogether. JJ couldn’t help but copy. The two of you fell into hysterics.

“That was it?” you howled.

“What the hell is all the fuss about?” JJ agreed with a guffaw.

Your laughter echoed off the trees and rocks, and encased you in a joyous, jovial bubble.

~*~*~*~*~*~*

There were no more pirates, at pirates’ cove. Now, instead, you, JJ and John B would sit around on the dirt bank and listen to music. You passed stories back and forth about school, with the JJ’s become more and more filthy, making you and John B groan through your laughs. You often wished you went to the same school as JJ and John B. Jealousy tickled at your throat whenever you thought of the two of them hanging out without you throughout the day. You knew JJ didn’t love school. As you neared the age of thirteen, he joked about skipping class more often. You also had this weird feeling that he still preferred it to being at home. Just two nights ago he had slept at your house again. He had red markings around his neck, as if his dad had tried to choke him. As always, you didn’t ask and he didn’t explain. You just held his hand and let him sleep. Snuck him breakfast in the morning and helped him climb out your window. He didn’t need the rope as much anymore, having had a growth spurt over the summer. It remained your shared secret. It was the only one you had from John B now. Neither of you had said about keeping it on the downlow– you just mutually decide it was best to.

JJ’s aforementioned growth spurt hadn’t gone unnoticed by you. As the three of you passed stories about the boat race that happened a couple of days ago, in the first week of summer break, you found your eyes drifting to JJ. To the way his arms moved as he talked, the beginnings of muscles building since he started getting more obsessive with gym. Around his neck is a shark tooth necklace that you’d given him as a feel-better gift, a couple days after his mom left, a year ago now. It sits against his toned, sun-kissed chest. The black button-up shirt he was wearing hung lose on his frame.

“Hey! You wanna stop ogling JJ and answer the question?” John B asked, tossing a grape at you to get your attention.

You rolled your eyes at him and flipped him the bird. “In your dreams am I ogling JJ, John B.”

“Think they’re more like his dreams but whatever,” John B muttered. To that, JJ flipped him off too.

“What was your question, then?” you asked.

“Wanna go hang out at the docks? See if there’s some odd jobs that need doing? We might be able to earn a couple of bucks or something,” John B said.

You shrugged. That actually didn’t sound half bad. So, finishing your soda, you nodded and got to your feet. “Let’s do it.”

“I’m telling you,” JJ began as he stood up, too. “This guy Heyward gave me a twenty just for helping wash down his boat the other day.”

“You’re full of shit,” you told him, rolling your eyes.

“I swear to God! A whole twenty!” JJ argued back loudly. His voice cracked in the process, making you and John B share a snigger. “Fuck off.”

“Oh, someone’s got their panties in a twist,” you whistled with a grin.

“You think I wear panties?” JJ asked you, raising a brow. The three of you had started walking by then, out of the marsh.

“I know it,” you quipped back.

JJ grinned boyishly and sprinted ahead, back facing you, before promptly mooning you and John B. You both groaned, shaking your heads at him as he broke into hysterics.

“You’re so gross, JJ,” you muttered, pretending to gag.

“Lucy don’t think so,” he cockily replied, falling back into step with the two of you.

“Lucy? That the flavour of the week, huh?” you teased.

JJ rolled his eyes, smirking. “She’s cute. She’s got this wonderful, enormous—”

He gestured graphically to his chest.

“-Personality.”

“You need help, JJ,” John B said in response, making you laugh.

It seemed the moment JJ had become an official teenager, he started thinking more with his dick than his head. Girls weren’t blind to him. He was a good-looking kid; funny and outgoing and rebellious. One of the girls in your friendship group at school had a crush on him, too. Had started asking you all about him: his favourite food and favourite music. Shamelessly, she wore a band tee-shirt of The Kooks (which hung so big on her, you suspected it was from her dad’s wardrobe) the next day when the two of you went to the boneyard to hang out. The older kids didn’t much like you guys there, but when there was enough of you, they seemed to tolerate it. You had stuffed down the joy you had gotten when seeing how JJ barely even glanced at her.  

The docks were rather quiet that day. Miss Amy nodded hello to the three of you as you walked down the jetty. JJ made a crude joke about her to John B, earning a shove in the shoulder as the former boy laughed. You petted one of the fishermen’s dogs as you passed another boat. Then, you were walking up near Heyward’s. There was a boy sat outside, reading a book.

“Yo. Heyward in?” JJ asked him.

The boy looked up. Dark skin and dark hair, eyes wide as if surprised someone was talking to him. “He had to head out for a bit.”

“Damnit,” JJ sighed, looking to you and John B.

“Why? What’d you need?” the guy asked.

“We’re just looking to see if we can make a couple bucks,” JJ told him.

John B clarifies what he meant by adding, “we helped him out with some groceries the other day.”

“Oh,” the guy nodded. “You guys from around here, too?”

“Sorta,” you replied. “We go to Kildare High.”

“Me too,” he smiled. You smiled back. He seemed like a nice guy. A little awkward and tense, but friendly, nonetheless. “I’m Pope.”

You introduced yourself, shaking his outstretched hand. John B did the same and JJ nodded at him, dropping his name last.

“There’s no groceries to run but the boat needs a clean,” Pope told you all, rising to his feet. “I was just gonna finish this chapter before doing it.”

“We’re down to help if you like,” John B said.

“How much for, like?”

“JJ!” You scolded.

He held his hands up. “What? Just asking! Not gonna do slave labour!”

“Ignore him,” you said to Pope. You looked to the jetty. “Which one’s yours?”

“This one,” Pope said, pointing. It’s painted white; a little well-loved but still in good nick. He put his book down after dog-earing the page. You couldn’t help but take a scan of the cover. The World Of Autopsies.

Following his lead, you grabbed at buckets and sponges. Pope unravelled the hose pipe and pulled it with him as you headed towards the boat. JJ messed with his cap, chatting to John B about fishing, and you fell in foot with Pope.

“What’s that book you’re reading?”

“It’s about autopsies,” Pope replied, sounding somewhat embarrassed as he looked at his feet.

“What? They didn’t have any copies of Jekyll and Hyde left?” you joked.

He smiled at that. “I wanna be a coroner, when I graduate high school.”

“Damn, you’re thinking about after high school? I don’t even think past after this year,” you chuckled.

“I don’t even think past after today!” JJ added loudly.

“You don’t have any reason to!” you called back snidely. He stuck his tongue out at you.

The three of you climbed aboard and got to cleaning. The conversation came naturally; cracking jokes and telling stories, getting to know Pope. Already, he was starting to feel like he was slotting quite comfortably into your strange little gang of pirates. JJ took the piss out of him rather a lot, but you knew that he liked him; could tell by the way he kept asking him questions and offering him help.

As you hosed down the deck, JJ scrubbed away at a stain on the flagpole. A wasp flew at you. Made you screech and dodge out of the way, sending the water stream messy. It hit JJ and drenched him in a second. He shouted out your name in a curse.

“Sorry!”

JJ rolled his eyes, finding his smile, and grabbed at the bucket of soapy water. You already knew what he was thinking. Laughing, you went to start running, but he was so fast (legs now so much longer than yours) and caught up easily, tipping the water on you. Screaming from the cold, you directed the hose pipe on him, aiming for his face. The two of you laughed, starting to wrestle as he battled for the hose, and you feel like pirates again, just as you were when you were seven.

Finally, easing up, the two of you broke apart. Your chest ached from laughing. JJ wiped his face and took off his soaked cap to brush back his hair. Then, his eyes fell on you.

Laughing, pointing at you, he said, “you’re looking way to hot right now.”

You looked down to see that the t-shirt you were wearing was now see-through from the wet, sticking to your bralette. Rolling your eyes mirthfully, trying to fight off the heat that was rushing to your cheeks, you messed with your top so it was no longer pasted to your skin.

“If you two are done flirting, I’ve got some drinks for you kids for your hard work,” a deep voice called.

You and JJ spun around to come face to face with Heyward. He was holding up a tray of plastic cups. The warmth in your face only got worse. JJ mumbled something along the lines of ‘we’re not flirting’ under his breath as the two of you dumb your stuff. Stepping off the boat, hose pipe now switched off, you, JJ, John B and Pope all enjoyed a drink, an unspoken, newly formed foursome.

~*~*~*~*~*~*

At sixteen came the year of experimenting. Alcohol and weed and cigarettes. A few classmates were now in relationships. First kisses were a thing of the past and instead gossip consisted of sex. Who did what? How far did they go? Conversations like that were made for JJ. Sat around at John B’s house, you sat next to the latest member of the group (Kiara), he’d divulge in dirty stories of debauchery which none of you asked for, but all would listen to, semi-curious. Especially the boys. John B was already leaning towards being a hopeless romantic. He’d revealed to you, one night, his crush on a certain Kook girl. You tried your best not to laugh him out of your room. There’s was no chance in hell anything like that could ever work out. Pope was less awkward with you guys now, but still useless with girls. Flirting was like a foreign tongue to him. Kiara didn’t seem all that interested in dating. You and she had never talked about crushes or guys.

“I swear man, this girl was going down on me like she was thirsty,” JJ grinned, smug and sure of himself.

You gagged into your drink, making Kie laugh.

“You’re so full of shit,” Pope told him.

“Dude, I’m telling you. Getting your dick sucked is like the best feeling in the world,” JJ gloated.

“Can we please talk about something else?” Kiara asked, rolling her eyes.

John B seemed happy to indulge. “So, my dad’s got a new trial he thinks with this gold—”

“Not about the gold!” the four of you chorused at him. John B shrunk back into his seat around the fire, taking a swig of his beer, wincing at the taste. None of you really liked it all that much, yet.

“Well, my parents are still leaning towards sending me to Kook Academy,” Kie said.

You frowned. “Really?”

“Mhm. I’ve managed to convince them to let me stay another year, but I think when I turn seventeen, it’s gonna happen.”

“Damn,” you said.

“Well, we’ll still, like, come hang out with you,” JJ told her.

“Gee, thanks, JJ,” Kiara sarcastically quipped at his luke-warm sentiment.

“Yeah. I’m sure your life is going to be lacking without JJ’s sex-stories,” you joked.

“Jealousy is a disease, babe. Get better,” he said to you, semi-bitter.

The conversation fell into talks about school and summer. Daydreaming for the endless days, when the sun rises at four and sets at midnight. Life feels infinite then, full of endless possibilities. Possibilities that you dote in, like how maybe JJ might snap out of dating this endless string of girls and look at you for once as more than a friend. You knew it was a pipe dream. After being his friend for so long, it seemed pathetic to think he might be able to picture you outside of that box. No matter. He was still your best friend.

“I gotta get going home,” Pope eventually said.

“Me too,” Kie agreed, getting up.

“You guys staying?” John B asked you and JJ.

You shook your head. “Sorry, Stinky. My parents asked for me back for midnight, so I’m already past curfew.”

John B smiled at the nickname. JJ was Smelly so it only seemed right for John B to be Stinky. Downing the last of your beer, you groaned and got to your feet. JJ stood up too.

“I better head as well before my old man gets ticked off,” JJ sighed.

The two of you share a look. You know it was bullshit; he was crashing at your place tonight, just like he did almost every night. The last fight him and his dad got in got bloody. JJ was strong enough to fight back now. He didn’t cry like he did when he was a kid. Just got angry. More times when he’d show up to your house after a row, he’d be seething, cussing his dad out and tugging at his hair. It scared you to see him collapse under the pressure like that. It seemed more and more like there was this tension lying under him. Part of it must’ve been inherited from his dad – his short-fused temper – but it seemed the happy-household he lived in only coaxed it out of him further.

“Ciao ciao,” JJ called as the two of you walked away from the chateau.

“Later Pogues,” John B hollered back.

“Pogues?” you mumbled, looking to JJ.

“Like Pogies? Scum-fish?”

“Ah,” you said, nodding.

“I like the sound of it,” JJ said.

You hummed your agreement. He fixed his cap. This one was green. He got it cheap from a thrift shop.

“Hey, smelly?”

“Yeah?”

“Can I ask you something?” you wondered.

“I feel like you’re going to anyway,” he chuckled.

“Is sex…Like, is it actually that good?” you asked. You want to look at him when you do, but you can’t seem to be able to hold his gaze. Found it easier to casually look at the ground ahead.

JJ shrugged; hands shoved in his short pockets. “Depends. Sometimes it’s better than other times.”

You nodded.

“Why?”

“Just wondering,” you mumbled.

The two of you don’t talk more about it. You walked back to your house in near silence, but it wasn’t uncomfortable or tense. Routine as always, you headed up the front door and quietly call out to your parents who are sat in the living room, watching television. You snuck past your younger brother’s door to his bedroom before walking into your own. Opening the window, you started taking off your jewellery at your dresser whilst he clambered through the window. He grabbed his toothbrush from your make-up brush pot, checked the cost of the corridor before darting into the bathroom. By the time he’s done, you were in your pyjamas and sat on the bed, scrolling through Instagram.

JJ borrowed your comb to start taming his hair. He’s stood in front of your mirror, in a pair of gym-style shorts that hang low on his waist. You do your best not to look at him, stood half-naked, abs on proud display. It feels wrong for you too.

“You haven’t had sex yet, right?”

You have to look up from your phone with that.

“What?”

“You haven’t slept with anyone yet, have you?” he repeated.

“Well…No, I guess not,” you mumbled.

JJ looked to you. “Why not?”

You laughed, trying your best to keep your voice down. “Nobody’s really into me like that.”

“Bullshit,” JJ immediately said.

“What?”

“Bull-shit! I know Matty P was asking you to the kegger just last week. That guy’s so horny for you – it’s obvious,” JJ replied.

You rolled your eyes and looked back down at your phone. “He’s also a sad loser who thinks owning a designer watch is an entire personality trait.”

JJ sniggered. “True.”

“I mean, everyone knows it’s fake,” you chuckled. It seemed to work, your distraction from the topic. You didn't think there would be anyway for you to subtly explain how you hadn't entertained the idea of someone else, in the hopes that one day, JJ might want you back.

You move to crawl under the bedsheets as JJ finished up on his hair. He took his spot and you yours, like always, and you flick off your lamp. There’s nothing but a single string of fairy lights keeping your room lit up. They hang above your bedroom door, batteries half-dead, only half-lit. Sighing, you turned off your phone and dumped it in on the bedside table. JJ got comfy, shifting around under the sheets. He smelt of cologne and smoke from the bonfire.

As he laid on his back, you laid on your side, facing the wall. You felt wide awake.

“You remember when we kissed?”

Wide wide awake.

“You mean back at Pirates’ Cove?”

“Yeah,” JJ said lowly into the darkness of the room.

“I mean, yeah. I remember it,” you replied. Silence. “Why?”

“Just thinking about it,” JJ mumbled. Frowning, you wondered what he could mean.

“In what way?”

“I don’t know,” he sighed. You hear the rustle of the duvet as he turned onto his side. You weren’t sure if he was facing you or the other wall. “Just how that was the first time I sort of realised you were a girl.”

You couldn’t help but laugh. You moved the blanket to muffle the noise. Rolling over, you come to find he was facing you. There was barely enough space for Jesus to fit between you both. Maybe his arm, might?

“Flattering, smelly,” you mumbled. Both of you sported lazy smiles.

“You look so different now,” JJ told you.

“I should hope so. That was six years ago,” you replied.

“Shit. Was it that long ago?” he checked. You nodded. “So, we’ve been friends for…”

“Nine years,” you finished.

“Nine years,” JJ echoed.

There was a strange sadness to his voice, like time passed too quickly. He was so much older now. Youth still there but mellowed, from his dad and his mom and his life. One would think adult things like sex and drinking would make him more mature, but it just screamed out him being young. Wanting to experience everything the world can offer, as if he might drop dead tomorrow.

“You know the first time you slept here,” you began, “you were crying. It was after your dad hit you.”

“He’d been laying into my ma,” JJ said, filling in the blanks. “I tried to get him off her and he just went for me instead.”

“I told you something.”

“I know,” JJ smiled. “You told me my house was haunted.”

“I really thought it was,” you chuckled soberly. “And I really thought if we just moved to pirates’ cove, everything would be fixed.”

“I know,” JJ said. “I believed you. I…I remember thinking that it was one of the nicest things you’d ever said to me, when you did.”

“Really?”

“Mhm. I think…”

He cut himself with a sigh, eyes drifting down, away from your gaze. For some reason, it makes your heartbeat viscerally harder.

“You think?” you encouraged, staring at him.

“I think that was the moment I realised I liked you.”

“Well, obviously. We’re friends, JayJ. I knew—”

“No,” he said, cutting you off, firm. His eyes are boring into yours, as if he can see into your thoughts. Your short-lived smile faded. “I mean that I realised I liked liked you. That I had a crush on you.”

You licked your lips nervously. “When we were kids?”

JJ’s fingers brushed against your own, under the blankets. He tangled his into yours, intertwining your hands, just like you had done when you were kids. You couldn’t tell who moved first, but the two of you start to kiss. You sighed against his lips, bringing up a hand to stroke at his jaw, feeling half-detached from your body. Is this real? Is this actually happening? The moment JJ’s teeth gently nipped at your lower lip was your answer. Yes.

All the other girls and all the other bullshit faded away. It didn’t matter to you, in that moment. JJ was tethered to you from the start, since you were kids. Everybody could see it coming – maybe even you – that the two of you would tumble through life together. It just needed time to grow, like nurturing a rare but beautiful flower. Yes, you thought, as the kiss deepens and the hands explored; good things take time.

[proactivetypaperson]

i would just like to introduce yall to the genre of drew starkey biting his nails. that is it. that is the post.

how does he make everything bad look so good

*bites nail* plus *intense glare* i will immediately get on to my knees

if yall thought i wanted to suck on his fingers before-

[prophecysgirl]

jiara (taylor's version) JIARA WEEK: lyrics

[rafedaddy01]

Drew smut based on the song I can see you by Taylor Swift 🥵

A/n: uhhhh I absolutely love this idea!!!!

You and drew have been cast mates for a few months now and occasionally you’d catch the way he’d look at you when you’d rehearse lines or when the cast would go out for dinner, the way he watched your lips move when you’d engage in simple conversation or the way you’d push a strand of hair behind your ear giving him a better view of your pretty face. He thinks you don’t notice the way he stared at you, but you do. You felt the same way but didn’t want to ruin the professional relationship between you, occasionally teasing him you’d brush your hand past his crotch or grip his bicep when he said something funny, sometimes even finding way to the back of his neck and playing with the little hairs, or placing a hand on his thigh for a better ‘grip’ when reaching over him for something.

One night it was just you and drew in his apartment when everybody else left and you stayed to help him clean. You both knew you couldn’t be anything but friends because it would ruin the dynamic of the group, but what if nobody knew? “Here let me help with that” you said taking the trash bag out of his hand, fingers grazing the top of his hand softly making his insides turn with excitement. “Thanks” he cleared his throat as he gathered himself together and went to clear the beer bottles laying around furniture. “Thanks for staying and helping, I appreciate it” he said shooting you a smile. “Of course” you said genuinely turning around and running into his firm, toned chest causing a shy giggle to leave your lips “oh-sorry” you said looking up into his blue eyes. You both stared at each other before you threw the trash bag on the ground and cupped his face pulling him in for a kiss. It was like all time slowed down, everything around you both blurred like it was just you two, just both of you in the moment and all the thoughts of how this was wrong slipped past your mind. “Y/n..” he huffed pulling away from the kiss. “Come on drew. Don’t tell me you don’t wanna do this, I see the way you look at me” you said smiling at him. His eyes darted between yours before tangling his fingers in your hair and pulling you closer to him. Your hands wrapped around his neck as he lifted your body around his torso, hands gripping your ass and squeezing causing a moan to slip in between each others lips. He walked you both into his room and placed you on the bed never breaking the kiss. You tugged at his shirt instructing him to remove it. He pulled away for a split second to remove it and found his way back to your swollen lips.

“Mmm” you moaned into the kiss as his hands roamed your body, slipping under your shirt and palming your breasts. “Take it off” you said and he pulled your shirt over your head and unclasped your bra. He watched as your boobs bounced and he groaned. Your hands reached for his pants and pulled his zipper down, tugging at the denim material and pulling his boxers down with them. He unbuttoned your shorts and shimmied them off you leaving you in your red, lacey panties. “Your so perfect” he said eyeing your body up and down before placing soft kisses on your stomach and down to your sensitive area. “Drew… please touch me” you whimpered. His eyes peered into yours has he bent down to your cunt and removed your panties, never breaking contact. His tongue slid thru your wet folds making you hiss at the feeling. He attached his mouth around your swollen bud and sucked harshly as he moaned against your cunt. “Fuck!” You threw your head back in pleasure, legs closing in on his head. With one hand he pressed them open and took his middle finger to your dripping hole and teased it before slipping it deep inside. You gripped his hair and pushed his head further into you. “Right there. Oh god! Don’t stop” you cried out as he pumped you full and sucked harshly. “I’m-im gunna-“ you said before falling back against his cool sheets and releasing your juices onto his face. He licked up the mess before drawing his finger out and sucking it clean.

You pulled him up to your lips and pushed your tongue into his mouth, tasting yourself on his lips as he positioned himself to your entrance. He pushed the tip in and both of you groaned before he bottomed out and thrusted into you. “Fuck y/n” he groaned as he looked down at were you connected beautifully. Your soaked pussy taking him all the way in, he looked back at your scrunched up face and almost came at the sight of you. “Fuck drew, right there” you said clawing at his back. His lips found way to your neck and sucked harshly “don’t leave a hickey” you reminded him that nobody could know about this and it would have to be a secret. He removed his lips and came down to kiss you. It was messy as your tongues slipped in each others mouths and drool fell from your lips down your chin. His thrusts became sloppy but deep and you wrapped your legs around his bum pushing him closer if even possible. “Shit y/n, your squeezing me so tight, I’m gunna cum” he grunted. You both came down from your highs and he laid down next to you catching his breath. “Well that happened” you said giggling “yeah” he huffed and chuckled.

[pink-princess-pussy-pop]

DEBUT - Invisible

Rafe Cameron x Reader Taylor Swift AU

OMFG I'M SO EXCITED FOR THIS.

Warnings: Not with the OBX plot, language, rafe is kinda a douche, not proofread

She can't see the way your eyes, light up when you smile. She'll never notice how you stop and stare whenever she walks by.

You and Rafe had been best friends since kindergarten. Rafe had stopped a group of girls from pushing you around on the playground and the two of you had been inseparable ever since. You and Rafe were now eighteen years old. Through your many years of friendship, you'd seen Rafe develop into a, for lack of a better term, fuck-boy. He'd have sex with basically any girl who would flirt with him, which was a lot.

Now, there was a girl that Rafe just couldn't get enough of. Sofia had just moved to the Outerbanks and had slept with Rafe on her first night here. You had heard all about her, how different she was from any other girl on the island, how gorgeous she was, and of course, what an amazing lay she was.

Rafe was hooked on her. It was odd to you, since in your 13 years of friendship, he had never once had a girlfriend. Now all of a sudden, Sofia was the one.

From your perspective, Sofia didn't seem interested in anything aside from being friends with benefits with Rafe, really only utilizing the benefits part.

And you can't see me wanting you the way you want her, but you are everything to me.

At some point during those thirteen years, you had developed feelings for Rafe. And those feelings turned into an unrequited love. Of course, Rafe had no idea about your romantic feelings toward him, but you thought about him all the time. He was basically your only friend, because everyone else who lived in the Outerbanks was scared of him.

And I just wanna show you, she don't even know you. She's never gonna love you like I want to. And you just see right through me, but if you only knew me, we could be a beautiful miracle, unbelievable, instead of just invisible.

You longed to tell Rafe how you truly felt, but you knew there was no way he felt the same. You were the complete opposite of Sofia. She was gorgeous and popular, just Rafe's type. You always let Rafe have the limelight in the friendship, to the point where sometimes you'd feel invisible when around others. But you knew deep down, you and Rafe would be amazing together. He was pining after someone who didn't care, who didn't love him. And it was agony.

There's a fire inside of you that can't help but shine through. She's never gonna see the light no matter what you do.

Sofia just could not see how amazing Rafe was. He was so protective of the people he loved. His family, you, and unfortunately, her. You'd seen her disregard him, fully rolling her eyes at his offer to drive her home after she had gotten too drunk at a party. Later, after they had hooked up while you watched a movie downstairs, he had driven her home, leaving you alone in Tannyhill. When he got back, you had told him and he just said, "No, she was just being Sofia. Didn't wanna leave her friends, ya' know?"

And all I think about is how to make you think of me and everything that we could be.

After he said that you wanted to shake him. Shake him and say, "Rafe she is only using you for your money and for your dick. She doesn't want to be with you. Why don't you realize that?" But you couldn't. Sofia made Rafe happy, and he deserves to be happy after having such a crummy childhood. You couldn't ruin that for him.

And I just wanna show you, she don't even know you. She's never gonna love you like I want to. And you just see right through me, but if you only knew me, we could be a beautiful miracle, unbelievable, instead of just invisible.

But all you could think of was how good you and Rafe would be together. You knew everything about him. His favorite movies, foods, what side of the bed he sleeps on, his favorite mug, his coffee order. And Sofia? All she knew about him was the size of the condoms he wears. How is that love?

Like shadows in a faded light, oh, we're invisible. I just want to open your eyes and make you realize.

You and Rafe had decided during Junior year that you'd go to all of your future school dances together. He didn't want to ask a hook-up, afraid they'd get the wrong idea and want a relationship, and you were too scared to ask someone, and everyone else was too scared to ask you because of Rafe.

Your heart broke when Rafe told you the day before Homecoming that he had asked Sofia. He was dropping you off at home after school. You had gotten out of his truck before turning around and leaning your crossed arms on the open window.

"Oh hey, my dress for tomorrow is light blue, so do not wear a tie that clashes or my mom will kill you. She's expecting good pictures."

Rafe looked like a deer in headlights.

"Fuck. I totally thought I had told you, I'm so sorry. I, uh, I asked Sofia to go with me." He looked at you with so much sympathy, truly sorry that he was ditching you.

You willed yourself not to cry, forcing a smile.

"Oh! No, it's totally ok. I mean you like her, so it's only natural you'd want to go with her. Don't worry about it!" You had to stop yourself from rambling. You began to turn away from the window, far too embarrassed to continue the conversation. His hand on your arm stopped you.

You turned back to see him leaning over the center console.

"Hey, you should still come. I'm sure Sofia wouldn't mind, I can text her-"

"Rafe stop. I don't want to third-wheel. Go with her. It's ok. I'll just..." You blink away the tears. "I'll just watch movies or something." You smile. "Just let me know how the night goes, kay?" He nods, not convinced that you're ok, but doesn't push further. You wave goodbye as you walk into your house before letting the tears fall.

I just wanna show you, she don't even know you. Baby, let me love you, let me want you. You just see right through me, but if you only knew me, we could be a beautiful miracle, unbelievable, instead of just invisible.

You told your mom that you were feeling too sick to go to the dance.

"But what about Rafe?"

"He found someone to go with, don't worry about him."

You spent the night alone in your room, not paying attention to the movies playing on your laptop. You had sent Rafe a text almost three hours ago and hadn't received a reply. He always texted right back. No matter what.

have fun tonight and don't do anything I wouldn't do... ;)

You contemplated deleting it but ended up deciding not to. You were just being clingy. He was finally on a date with the girl he liked. Of course, he won't reply right away. He'd reply eventually, wouldn't he?

She can't see the way your eyes light up when you smile.

The next morning, you have no texts from him. But his Instagram has a new post of the pictures he had taken with her the night before. Sofia looks gorgeous, in the same light blue color you were planning on wearing. Then, you notice that she isn't looking at him in any of the photos while Rafe is looking at her like she was the love of his life.

You put your phone on Do Not Disturb for the rest of the day, not wanting it to alert you when he eventually texts you back.

fuck, just saw this, so sorry

it was great! thx for being so understanding about the whole date thing

ur literally the best friend ever

YAYAYAY! I know i said i was gonna wait until the ghostface au was finished but while i was away i had so many ideas about this. next chapter is...

Fearless: You Belong With Me

[pankowkisses]

Juby week day 1

I can do it with a broken heart

Jj’s P.O.V

I’ve been hurt way to many times more then a 16 year old should be hurt, the physical pain, the emotional tournament I’ve endured at the hands of my own father, he watched all the pieces of me shatter while the crowd of his mind screamed more, Ive been a real tough kid for way to long , I’ve handled my shit for longer than I’ve meant to , they said fake it till you make it and I did lights, camera ,bitch smile even when you wanna die , he said he’d love his child all his life, but that life was too short. Breaking down I hit the floor all the pieces of me shattered, while he continued shouting more , I’m so depressed that I can act like it’s my birthday everyday , you know your good when you can even do it with a broken heart, I can hold my breath, I’ve been doing it since he left, I keep finding her in my room healing my wounds , she’s been doing it since she saw, I was miserable she’s the only one who knows, she knows I’m good when I can do it with a broken heart, the heart she healed, cherished with the kindness she has given me , I’ll forever be grateful for my ruby, my love ,my salvation

My girl

My sincerest apologies for the shorter juby week post I’ve had quite a busy few weeks and a bad couple of days recently but I think I’m okay now

Yours truly juby’s number 1 supporter!

[honeysmoonn]

pls pls pls pls someone talk to me im so bored and willing to talk about any of the following (dallas winston, jj maybank, luke castellan, taylor swift) SND MKRE😘😘😘just pls message me

[rafesveryrealgf]

All too well | series

(College!rafe x highschool!reader)

Warnings: NON CANON, minor!reader x adult!rafe relationship, sexual innuendos, talk about sex, parties, drinking, drug use, toxic relationship, cursing, toxic!rafe, lowkey innocent!reader, loss of virginity, crying, angst, lots of arguing

Synopsis: you’re a seventeen year old that fell for a twenty-two year old, what could possibly go wrong..?

A/N: series was inspired by the song ‘all too well’ by Taylor swift, the age difference isn’t as drastic as it is in the song, but the lesson Taylor learned vs the lesson the reader learns is basically the same.

Chapter one

Chapter two

Chapter three

Chapter four

Chapter five

Chapter six

Chapter seven

Chapter eight

Chapter nine

Chapter ten

[msperfectlyfine2]

All Of The Girls I’ve Loved Before

A - Annabeth Chase, Avery Grambs

B - Blake Lively

C - Carol Danvers, 

D - 

E - Elena Gilbert, Elsa

F - Fleur Delacour

G - Gwen Stacy, Gamora,

H - Hermione Granger

I - 

J - Juliette Ferrars, Jude Duarte

K - Katherine Pierce, Katniss Everdeen, Kiara Carrera

L - Lily Evans, 

M - Minerva McGonagall, Michelle Jones

N - Natasha Romanoff

O - 

P - Pepper Potts, Pippa Fitz-Amobi, 

Q - 

R - Rebekah Mikaelson

S - Sarah Cameron

T - Taylor Swift

U - 

V - Valkyrie, 

W - Wednesday Addams, 

X - 

Y - Yelena Belova

Z - Zendaya

[proactivetypaperson]

NO CAUSE NAME ONE PERSON WHO LOOKS THIS GOOD IN SWEATERS ALSO BICEPS FOR DAYS

#hands hands hands

#he would step on me and id thank him

#his hair has a personality of its own

[lifeofafangirl1]

♡︎Welcome To My Blog♡︎

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𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫𝐭 𝐋𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐮𝐩:

𝐇𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐒𝐭𝐲𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐎𝐧 𝐓𝐨𝐮𝐫 - 𝟏𝟖/𝟎𝟕/𝟐𝟐, 𝐖𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐲 𝐧𝟏

𝐋𝐨𝐮𝐢𝐬 𝐓𝐨𝐦𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐨𝐧 𝐅𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐈𝐧 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐮𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝 𝐓𝐨𝐮𝐫 - 𝟏𝟐/𝟏𝟏/𝟐𝟑, 𝐆𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐠𝐨𝐰

𝐎𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐚 𝐑𝐨𝐝𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐨 𝐆𝐔𝐓𝐒 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝 𝐓𝐨𝐮𝐫 - 𝟎𝟖/𝟎𝟓/𝟐𝟒, 𝐆𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐠𝐨𝐰

𝐓𝐚𝐲𝐥𝐨𝐫 𝐒𝐰𝐢𝐟𝐭 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐄𝐫𝐚𝐬 𝐓𝐨𝐮𝐫 - 𝟎𝟕/𝟎𝟔/𝟐𝟒, 𝐄𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐛𝐫𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐧𝟏

(𝐔𝐩𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠) 𝐑𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐥 𝐂𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐫𝐢 - 𝟏𝟐/𝟏𝟏/𝟐𝟒, 𝐆𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐠𝐨𝐰

𝐎𝐔𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐊𝐒:

♡︎︎Public Insta: https://www.instagram.com/finelinearry_?igsh=MXZzcWxzajkxY3p0OQ%3D%3D&utm_source=qr

♡︎Second writing account: https://www.tumblr.com/heyangel28

♡︎Airbuds: https://i.airbuds.fm/maisie.vaughan/bzw2mRftoY

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Swiftie Analysis <3 Section

My opinions/how I view different lyrics from songs

The Manuscript <3

The Archer <3

The Manuscript x Tolerate It <3