#thank you guys so much for reading along on this crazy journey!!

[huffle-dork]

Swap Across the CrystalVerse Chapter 25: Epilogue

Read Swapboys | Crystal’s AUs|

Read SITCV | SATCV Masterpost | AO3 Link

Alt and Jackie find themselves in a pitch black space. And yet, somehow, they can still see themselves and each other. Just... nothing else. 

Anti appears behind them. "Okay," he says. "Let's--" 

And then, suddenly, someone else appears. Bro, with Mag still slung over his shoulder. And behind him, another Anti with an eye-patch and green scarf. "Okay," that Anti says. "Let's--" 

And then the two Antis lock eyes. And they stop.

Alt stops as soon as he hears the other voice and puts an arm up to hold Jackie back behind him protectively. 

Bro's eyes meet Alt's and he breaks out into a huge grin. "Y-You're okay!" 

Alt and Jackie look relieved, "Chase!" they say almost at the same time. They all look like they wanna run towards each other- but they glance at the antis warily. 

"... how come you guys got an Anti too?" Bro asks, tilting his head. 

"Bro- this one hasn't even met us!" Jackie says. 

"what??? How does that work??" 

"Heh. You guys think you're the only versions of yourselves out there?" The Anti with Bro grins. "Didn't you see that shit back there? Lots of different worlds that are all pretty similar. I thought I was the only one of me, though." 

The Anti with Jackie and Alt nods. "Same. Maybe it's just the two of us." 

"Maybe." 

The Anti with Bro has a short sleeve shirt, and behind his tightly-wound scarf there are bandages around his neck. The Anti with Alt and Jackie is wearing long sleeves, and his scarf is looser, showing a bare neck beneath it. 

"So." Short-sleeve Anti gestures at his neck. "You... took care if it, then? Jack is safe?" 

Long-sleeve Anti nods. "From them, at least. We're having some trouble with IRIS. Did those guys fuck with you?" 

"Oh yeah. Give 'em hell." 

"Oh believe me, I will." A pause. "So... how'd you meet these guys, then?"

Alt watches the conversation with a furrowed brow. "...I feel like you are being really causal about this and its kinda freaking me out..." 

Jackie looks like he's gonna have a crisis thinking about other hims that are like him in the moment. 

Bro adjusts Mag on his shoulder and genuinely seems unbothered. He wouldn't be able to comprehend what all this means anyways. 

Bro then looks at long sleeved Anti and grins, "Oh! We got blasted into his universe by some black magic glitchy fuckery and he helped to save our friends from the messed up guys in your universe! Which... I'm guessing are the same considering how you two are talking." 

"I don't understand," Alt says, glitching forward and in between the two Antis. "How... are you guys the same but- you don't know what the other did? Aren't... you from the same world? The same things happen to you and... that's what makes you.. you- right?"

"Well... yeah, I guess when you put it that way," Long-sleeve Anti says. "We have to have shared most experiences." 

"Otherwise we wouldn't be so similar." Short-sleeve Anti nods. "I think I understand. The moment you guys showed up in our universe, it must've split in two--the version where you showed up, and the version where you didn't. That's why he doesn't know you guys. Hey, d'you remember Marvin's museum heist? With that weird ass doorway in the middle of the exhibit?" 

Long-sleeve Anti nods. "What? Something happen there?" 

"Marvin shot his magic at me while in that doorway. That somehow summoned these guys and two of their friends." 

"Ah. That didn't happen with me. I glitched out of the way just before. So that's the point of divergence." 

"ooh!" Alt says, eyes sparkling as he understands. "It's... its a timeline split! Okay... okay that makes sense!" He laughs, "I dunno why that's easier for me to wrap my head around..." 

"Would make sense," Short-sleeve Anti muses. "Marvin got really fucking obsessed with other worlds after that. If he never met these guys... none of that would've happened." Sadness flashes across his expression. "Jack would be safe right now..." 

Long-sleeve Anti glitches over to him. "You'll get him back," he says. "I know what we're capable of, and I know you can get him back." Short-sleeve Anti smiles. "...thanks."

Bro and Alt look kinda guilty and look away from the tender Anti moment while Jackie blinks a bit in confusion. 

Alt looks back to the Anti they know with determination, "...my offer still stands you know. If you ever need back up we can be-" He then cuts himself off and it dawns on him that... he can't make that promise anymore. The TRVLR is gone. Frustrated tears perk up in his eyes and he quickly tries to blink them away. "...well... n-nevermind can't... really u-universe hop anymore..."

Short-sleeve Anti raises an eyebrow. "I'm guessing something happened to your TRVLR." 

"Sounds like some IRIS shit," Long-sleeve Anti mutters. 

"Ha! That's exactly what it is. They got it from another world with them, stole it." 

"Nice." Long-sleeve Anti pauses. "You don't... think it's related to the rifts, do you? This TRVLR thing?" 

"I don't think IRIS is capable of doing shit like that. But... they might be linked." Short-sleeve Anti looks at the guys. "Well? What happened?"

Alt curls his hands into fists, magic flickering and sparking around him in anger. "...we were tricked. We thought the TRVLR got broken during a trip we took to that medieval world I told you about which is... such a long story. But- we thought it would be okay to take Jackie to go meet his superhero self! But then... it kept breaking- taking us to new places instead of taking us home... and we found out it was all a plan to bring the TRVLR to the universe we were in b-before all this rift stuff happened... and he, another Anti... he took Mag's magic and he destroyed the TRVLR and said he was gonna go d-delete other universes and... we couldn't stop him. The TRVLR tried to warn us! it said the universe was under quarantine but... I..." He gets angrier as he looks towards the still passed out Mag, "Mag got a hold of me right away and I- I couldn't warn anyone or get away and he... he-" Alt takes a couple shaky breaths to keep from exploding in anger, or bursting to tears. He honestly feels on the brink of both. "He got it and... We got sucked into the rifts and separated in the places you both found us. I... I dunno where he is now... who knows how many things he might have destroyed..." His shoulders shake and his voice breaks as he whispers out, "A-and it's all my fault...!" 

"Hey! Alt d-don't say that," Bro says gently. "None of us could have prepared for this..."

The Antis stare, eyes getting wide as Alt tells his story. Then they look at each other. 

"Must've been one of the places with a connection, right?" Long-sleeve Anti says. 

"Yeah." Short-sleeve Anti nods. "Couldn't have been the place with the facility, I don't think the Anti there cares for deleting worlds. Same with that place with the time loop city. So... the other one." 

"Yeah." Long-sleeve Anti nods. "That must be why They sent out a call. Because that Anti escaped. He can't do that much, though, can he?" 

"...connection... call... what are you guys talking about?" Jackie tries to ask.

"Some universes have connections to other worlds," Long-sleeve Anti says. 

"It's hard to grasp, I know, just... accept it and it'll be easier," Short-sleeve Anti adds. 

"Oh.. okay," Jackie replies meekly. 

Short-sleeve Anti frowns. Then he turns to Alt. "Your brother's right," he says in a quiet voice. "Nobody could have prepared for that. It's not your fault, okay? He was already working on a way out. He would have found it eventually, even if you didn't show up. It's not your fault. Okay? For some reason, people love to blame themselves for things that others have done. Not sure why. All it does is let the actual perpetrators escape blame-free, because they don't usually feel the guilt that decent people do. You gonna let this guy get away blame-free while you take it all?" He shakes his head. "It's not your fault. Anyone else in your situation would've been tricked, I'm sure. Even me. Or, uh, us." He gestures at himself and the other Anti.

Alt is quiet and is fighting back tears. 

Bro sees how this is affecting Alt and he throws Mag to the... well what they're standing on- hard to tell with all this black. And then hurries over to come and hug him. 

Alt seems resistant at first but eventually leans in, sniffling. He laughs half-heartedly at Anti's point and shakes his head. "... no...you're right I just... feel responsible..." 

Bro shakes his head rests his on top of Alt's. "You're responsible for your actions only, Alt. No one else's." 

Alt snorts and rolls his eyes. "Okay, Dr. J." 

"He has very good points! That's why he gets paid to say this stuff!" Bro laughs as he nudges Alt. Then, he takes in all the blood on him and gasp. "Holy shit Alt-!" 

From the combination of being tossed to the floor like wet garbage and the sound of the siblings bickering, Mag's eyes finally blearily open. He pushes himself up and has a nice purple bruise forming next to his eye on his left side. He notices the fact they're in complete darkness and there's two Antis and blinks super slowly, trying to process. "...the fucking hell is happening...?" He mutters dazedly.

The moment Magnificent is awake, the two Antis snap their attention to him. "So... who the hell is this guy?" Long-sleeve Anti asks. "A Marvin?" 

"Yeah, as bad as ours," Short-sleeve Anti growls. "I put him on the list." 

"Oh." Whatever that means, it apparently immediately sours Long-sleeve Anti's opinion of Magnificent, and he glares at him. 

"...I dunno what the list is but I'm intrigued... maybe I should have a villains list." Bro muses. 

Alt laughs, "Why bother? We all know Mag is at the top." 

"Not true! ...Overdose is up there too. ...and that King bastard." Chase says with a shudder. 

Short-sleeve Anti glitches over to Mag, crouching by him where he's lying on the black 'ground.' "Here's the deal, Mag," he says. "Right now, you're somewhere that only I--or this other version of me--can navigate. We could very easily leave you here, and you wouldn't be able to do shit about it. So, I suggest you play nice. Otherwise we might decide to just take these three with us when we leave. And keep in mind, your mind tricks don't work on me. Either version."

Magnificent stumbles back as short-sleeved Anti appears in front of him and looks between the two with even wider eyes. "T-There's fucking two of you?!" He gasps and tries to back up. He tries to save face by glaring at the Anti in front of him and glances at the other. But, eventually he sighs and frowns at Anti. "... I suppose that's do-able. I can humor you... until you idiots figure out a way out of this mess, I guess." 

"Man- can't believe Mag is actually scared of you guys," Jackie grins. 

"I am not-!" Magnificent tries to argue.

"Heh." Short-sleeved Anti gives a wicked grin, then glitches back over to the rest. "Well. Clearly, you guys all need to get home. Though I know what you'll say. About that other Anti who's running loose through the multiverse. You'll want to help, won't you? Or... at least you two will." He nods at Bro and Alt. "I'm not as familiar with you, Jackie." 

"I'm starting to realize I might not be the... adventuring type," Jackie says quietly, rubbing at his arm. "B-But I'd like to help where I can...?"

Bro smiles sadly at Jackie and brings him into a side hug, "You've been doing amazing, Jackie..." 

"They can't exactly help if they don't have a way to go to other worlds, though," Long-sleeve Anti points out. 

"Yeah. Which is why we need to ask for Their help. If anyone can figure out something to fix all of this, it's Them."

Alt blinks in confusion and looks between the Antis, "umm... who's them?" 

Even Mag's eyes spark curiously.

"Oh... just the most powerful being in this branch of the multiverse," Long-sleeve Anti says, giving a little chuckle. 

"They sensed when the rifts started opening up and sent out a call for anyone who might be able to help with that," Short-sleeve Anti adds. "I answered. And it seems like I also answered." 

"Sounded urgent," Long-sleeve Anti shrugs. "Especially since They mentioned people were out of place.”

"Hold on a second, They'll probably be coming here any moment," Short-sleeve Anti says.

Jackie notices it first, followed shortly by Alt. The area around them is pitch black, except for a small green dot of light in the distance. It grows bigger, getting closer. Baseball size, then basketball size, then beachball size. It keeps going. The size of a sofa, the size of a room. 

Mag senses it more than sees it as it approaches. When he first entered that world with the horror creatures, he felt Cait Coill's power was an ocean. This is like a million oceans... a million oceans of acid. The closer it gets, the more clear it is that he does not want this power in his body. The size of a house, the size of a building, and the green glow just keeps getting bigger and bigger and bigger until the whole sky above them seems to be glowing green. And then, the green glow rolls. A rim of blue appears, followed by an expanse of black. It is a massive, glowing green eyeball.

Magnificent's jaw drops, shuddering as he feels the power wash over him. 

Alt and Jackie gasp loudly. Alt tries to glitch back but realizes soon enough it's futile. They're becoming the very sky themselves. 

Bro is confused at first, "...why is the sky glowing green." Then, he sees the rim of blue and black and he makes a pog face then points up at the sky, "GIANT SAM??!" 

Alt bursts into awed breathless laughter, "i... I guess so…!" 

"Yeah." The two Antis say in unison, nodding identically. 

"What the fuckkk??" Jackie breathes. 

{I AM SORRY IF I'M FRIGHTENING YOU, BUT I CANNOT CHANGE MY SIZE OUT HERE BEYOND THE WORLDS,} a voice says in all their minds. {I WILL KEEP THIS SHORT. IT IS NOT SAFE TO BE AROUND ME FOR TOO LONG OUT HERE. I KNOW ALL THAT HAS HAPPENED. I'M SORRY THAT IT HAS HAPPENED THIS WAY.}

"..i..it's okay," Alt tries to reply. 

"But, the Antis said you could help us, right?" Bro asks hopefully.

{INDEED,} Sam says. {I CAN OPEN A WAY HOME FOR YOU.} 

"What about their TRVLR?" Short-sleeve Anti asks. 

"And the Anti that's going to fucking 'delete' worlds?" Long-sleeve Anti adds. 

{DO NOT WORRY ABOUT HIM YET,} Sam says. {HE HAS GAINED THE POWER TO JUMP THROUGH WORLDS, BUT DESTROYING THEM WILL TAKE MUCH, *MUCH, MUCH* MORE. AS FOR THE DEVICE... THAT WILL TAKE SOME TIME. IT WOULD BE BEST TO FIND THE PARTS THAT HAVE BEEN SCATTERED, AND EVEN I WILL HAVE DIFFICULTY WITH THAT.}

"I-If you could take us back to the world where we found it- we could just grab another one," Alt says, stepping forward. "There were so many more just lying around! All they need to work is my magic!"

{BUT YOU WOULD LOSE ALL THE WORLDS YOU HAVE BEEN TO BEFORE,} Sam says. {AND ALL THE PEOPLE YOU HAVE MET THERE. UNLESS YOU REMEMBER THE NUMBERS, THE ONLY WAY TO FIND THEM AGAIN WOULD BE THROUGH TRIAL AND ERROR.} 

"Couldn't you just give them a device with all the worlds marked?" Short-sleeve Anti asks. 

{NO. MY POWER IS NOT... PRECISE LIKE THAT. IT IS MUCH MORE BLUNT.}

Alt deflates and sighs, holding his arms, "But then... didn't we already lose them? Our TRVLR was smashed into bits... How can you possibly find every piece and put them back together?" He bites his lips, feeling the pinprick of tears again, "...I don't want to lose our way to them... but.. i...i dunno..."

{IT IS ALWAYS YOUR CHOICE,} Sam says. {I PROMISE YOU, I WILL BE ABLE TO FIND EACH ONE. I SEE EVERYTHING, AFTER ALL. BUT THE PRECISION OF GATHERING AND PUTTING THEM TOGETHER WILL REQUIRE AID. PERHAPS FROM ONE OF THE GLITCHES.} 

The two Antis look at each other. 

{BUT IF YOU WISH FOR SOME OTHER SOLUTION, I WILL BE ABLE TO HELP WITH WHATEVER YOU COME UP WITH.}

Alt is quiet for a second and Bro comes up and puts a hand on his shoulder. Eventually he sighs and looks up at Sam with a sad smile. "...I guess I'm gonna have to trust you guys... but I think I can do that...."

{VERY GOOD,} Sam says. 

"Well?" Long-sleeve Anti asks the other. "You or me? I think I have more free time." 

Short-sleeve Anti shakes his head. "I'm already involved in all this multiverse shit. I... have stuff to do back home, but I think I'm more qualified." 

"Hmm." Long-sleeve Anti purses his lips. "I guess... I've only really talked to that man who glitched into the In-Between and that young boy. You have these guys, they've visited your world and everything. But are you sure? What about your Jack?" 

Short-sleeve Anti hesitates. "I... have people who are helping. And I'm sure I can do both at the same time. Take care of your Jack, okay? I'd... rather that happen." 

"If you're sure," Long-sleeve Anti says quietly. 

{REMEMBER, ALT BRODY,} Sam says. {YOU CANNOT WORRY ABOUT EVERYTHING. YOU CAN ONLY TRUST YOU'RE CAPABLE OF HANDLING IT.}

Alt's eyes widen and he looks back at Sam with shock. "... You... was that... you? In the world where..." He swallows shakily. "...where i was corrupted...? or was that Sam... merely passing along the message?”

{THAT WAS ME,} Sam says, a smile in Their mental voice. {THAT IS THE WORLD I HAIL FROM. JACK IS A GOOD FRIEND OF MINE... AND ANTI IS MY MISTAKE. BUT THAT IS A LONG STORY.} 

"You're from that world??" Bro asks, "How... does that work? How did you go from a tiny thing back there to this... massive fucking thing?!" He spreads out his arms as wide as he can to emphasize his point. 

Alt looks surprised too but does smile hearing about Jack. And shudders thinking about that Anti...

{OH... I CAN BE THIS BIG BACK THERE, TOO,} Sam says. {IN FACT, THIS IS MY NATURAL SIZE. I SHRINK DOWN FOR OTHERS' CONVENIENCE. BUT I CANNOT OUT HERE. IT IS THE TRADEOFF FOR THE POWER I MUST USE TO OPEN A DOOR TO OTHER WORLDS.}

“Whattt???” Bro says, dumbfounded. 

“Do the guys back there know about that?” Jackie asks curiously.

{THEY KNOW I AM UNUSUAL,} Sam says. {THOUGH THEY DO NOT KNOW JUST HOW UNUSUAL. JACK DOES, I AM TELLING HIM EVERYTHING SLOWLY NOW THAT HE CAN HEAR MY VOICE NATURALLY. BEFORE THAT, COMMUNICATION WITH HUMANS WAS DIFFICULT. EVEN NOW, IT IS SLIGHTLY UNSAFE THAT YOU HAVE NOT ACCLIMATED, BUT I FEEL THIS WAS AN URGENT CASE.}

"We should get them home then, shouldn't we?" Short-sleeve Anti asks, nodding towards the four others. 

{SOON, YES. PERHAPS IF THEY HAVE A COUPLE MORE QUESTIONS, BUT KEEP THEM SHORT.}

Alt is quiet for a bit before he looks back up, “…how will you find us again? …none of us can get to here. And now we can’t travel to other universes… unless we use that doorway but… I don’t trust that thing one bit.” He glares at Mag who quickly looks away.

{I CAN OPEN UP A RIFT FOR A SLIGHT MOMENT OF TIME,} Sam says. {I TRUST ANTI TO GO THROUGH AND DELIVER ANY MESSAGES OR ITEMS TO YOU.} 

Short-sleeve Anti nods. "And I can get back to my home from anywhere."

“Damn lucky-“ Jackie giggles. 

Alt nods, “…alright. Then… I guess we’re all… good.” He still looks sad and uneasy about all this, anxiety about that escaped Anti clawing at his gut. 

“Our world is gonna be… safe, right? From that crazy Anti?” Bro asks quietly.

{YOUR WORLD IS FAR FROM HIS,} Sam says. {ON A DIFFERENT BRANCH. IT WILL BE DIFFICULT FOR HIM TO REACH IT. ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE. IT IS A MIRACLE THAT YOU HAVE BEEN ABLE TO REACH THIS BRANCH AND HOP THROUGH AS EASILY HAS YOU HAVE.} 

"If you see that crazy guy, I'll be right behind him," Short-sleeve Anti says. "Gonna fucking kick his ass for trying to reach you guys." 

Long-sleeve Anti raises an eyebrow. "You'd go that far?" 

Short-sleeve Anti pauses. "I guess I would."

“Awww have you grown a soft spot for us Anti~?” Bro taunts playfully. 

Alt smiles wide, laughing along. “…it’s good to know we can count on you, Anti.” 

Magnificent makes a gagging motion and Jackie kicks at him. Mag hisses at him.

Short-sleeve Anti gives a small smile. And at that, so does the other one. "Well... we should head home, shouldn't we?" he says. 

"We should. And you should too." Short-sleeve Anti nods at the four of them. 

{THEY WILL HAVE TO GO FIRST,} Sam says. {AFTER ALL, THEY NEED AN ENTRANCE, WHILE YOU TWO CAN GO BACK AS YOU WISH.}

“I guess… this is goodbye for now, then.” Bro says with a sad smile. 

Alt looks back at Sam, “thanks then… for all your help.” He smiles back at the Antis, “And you two too.” 

Jackie steps up next to his friends and laughs nervously, “Dunno if I’ll be doing another one of these things again anytime soon but… thanks.” 

Mag stays quiet and doesn’t look at anyone, rubbing at the bruise on his face.

The Anti in long sleeves nods. "Nice to meet you all. I can see why this other me got attached." 

The Anti they know rolls his eye. "You guys stay safe. I hope I'll see you all soon--to give you your TRVLR again." He glances at Mag. "And you." He doesn't say anything, just glares threateningly. 

Magnificent still flinches slightly- which have the other swaps giggling. 

Then Anti looks back to the others. "Here's to the future." 

{WHEN YOU ARE READY...} A bit of green lightning snaps down from the Sam high above. A small tear appears in the pitch-black of the Space In-Between, and through it... a familiar sight. Home. {STEP THROUGH. GOOD LUCK, AND GOODBYE.}

The swaps all watch in awe as the lightning strikes and then perk up at the small glimpse of home. Calling to them. 

Bro smiles and offers his hands to the others. “Together?”

Alt rolls his eyes with a chuckle. “Cheesy. But… yeah.” He takes Bro’s hand. 

Jackie grins, squeezing Bro’s hand, “One last hold for the road! Just in case it’s bumpy~” 

“By the gods your sentimentality makes me sick,” Mag grumbles. “Can we move on?” 

“Don’t be bitchy just cuz you’re jealous, Marv.” Jackie says, sticking out his tongue at Mag. 

Magnificent snorts but hides his look of anger. He teleports ahead of the others- just long enough to linger in the other side before he disappears from sight. 

The other swaps all roll their eyes and laugh- then, they step back through the portal, together.

They find themselves in a familiar place when they walk through the rift. The Brody brothers' apartment, right where they left. 

Magnificent is not with the three of them. When he walked through, he appears right where he left as well. In his warehouse.

The boys all look at each other and then collapse into different chairs or places to sit around the living room. They sit together in a long long silence- Their exhaustion palpable in the air. 

Finally, Bro speaks up, looking at Jackie. “…did you mean that back there, Jackie? That you don’t think you can… do these trips anymore?” 

Jackie doesn’t meet their eyes as he shrugs. He laughs uneasily. “Well… guess we do have a break now but… y-yeah… I think I… I need to step out of these.” Frightened tears come into his eyes. “…in the last world… I… I almost died- if Anti hadn’t found me in time… I… I…” he takes a shaky breath and holds his arms. “….all I could think about was Zara and the kids… never knowing what happened to me. I… I dunno if I can do that again…” 

Bro and Alt look at their friend with sadness and understanding. 

Then, the door to apartment opens quietly- before there’s a gasp, then an angry female voice yelling, “Jackie Finnigan Mann!! Where the hell have you been?!”

Jackie’s head snaps back to look at who’s at the door- it’s Zara. She looks a mix between angry and relived. “One day at most my ass! Where-?!” 

She gets cut off as Jackie clambers to get to her and almost knocks her over by hugging her tightly. “I’m sorry Zara! I’m so so sorry, love…” he whispers, voice breaking as he holds her tightly. 

Zara blinks slowly but then quickly hugs him back, “oh… love… you’re trembling…!” She rubs his back and kisses his cheek, “…I’m just glad you’re okay…” She looks to Bro and Alt with confusion, “what… happened?” 

Bro shakes his head, “it’s a long story, z… we can catch you up in a bit. I think we all need… some time.” 

Zara nods and squeezes Jackie before letting go- “here… you all look terrible and exhausted… come over to our house and I’ll make you all dinner okay?” Then she blinks and gasps, “holy fuck Alt! You’re hurt!” 

Alt blinks slowly and looks down, “…oh yeah-“ 

“Okay- first a trip to Ollie, then I’ll make you all dinner.” Zara says sternly. 

Alt laughs hollowly and nods, “okay… guess I can’t argue with that… Ollie has Glitches after all…” 

“Isn’t he not supposed to treat you now that you both are dating?” Bro asks with a smirk. 

Alt blushes and Zara snorts, “I think he’ll make an exception. Or we’ll see the other dooms I don’t care just-! C’mon you lot.” She leads Jackie out and Bro soon staggers up to follow after. He pats Alt on the shoulder and then walks out the door. 

Alt lingers for a second, noticing the empty feeling in his pocket more than ever. But, soon enough he follows after his friends. 

None of them had to do this alone.

[jjngkook7]

Choices (6)

Werewolf Au! Jungkook x Reader / Enemies to Lovers [Angst and mature content. Not smut but almost smut.]

Summary: Jungkook finally found her. His mate. His lifelong partner. But she’s a human. Does he have to stay with her or can he stick it to whatever and whoever binds mates together and make his own decision? ***THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR PATIENCE. I PROMISE I WON'T MAKE YOU WAIT THIS LONG AGAIN***

Chapter 1 / Chapter 2 / Chapter 3 / Chapter 4 / Chapter 5

You rang in the new year with some coworkers. The night was a blur of lights, laughter and music. Despite being a lightweight, you didn’t get as drunk as you thought, in fact, you were barely tipsy. It was hard to have fun when your reality didn’t even feel real. You had all the ingredients to drink your heart out: you met who was supposed to be your soulmate, you find out that mythical creatures are real and your best friend in the whole world has been hiding all of this from you for a year. To add more salt to the wound, Jennie spent Christmas and New Years with the pack. Sad wasn’t quite the right word for how you felt, maybe confused or disoriented? You had been in a haze since the last time you saw everyone trying to figure out if the past weeks were real or not.

After Jungkook dropped you back off at the cabin, Namjoon decided that you should leave for your safety. Apparently having someone as unpredictable as Jungkook free from his chains while his mate was hanging out with other men was not a good idea even after you told Namjoon that Jungkook actually saved your life. Namjoon took you home that night and advised you to keep your distance for a while. He seemed sad when he dropped you off and truth be told, you were kind of sad too. You had a fondness for Namjoon because he was the one that made you feel sane and safe throughout this whole journey. You would miss your friendship with him and everyone else.

Your phone pinged, reeling you out of your thoughts. You thew it towards the edge of your bed when you saw that it was just one of those annoying marketing texts. Your eyes then glided towards the Christmas card on your nightstand as it did almost everyday; it was the one artifact you had proving that everything you went through was real. Everyone from the pack had signed the card, all except for one. You reached for the card and ran your fingertips over the glitter covered snowman on the front page. I wonder how he’s doing. Embarrassed didn’t even begin to explain how you felt. You felt like a fool, an actual idiot for still wondering about Jungkook’s wellbeing when he couldn’t even write his name on a stupid Christmas card for you-he probably laughed when Namjoon asked him to contribute. With one last read through of the card, you placed it under your bed and made never thinking about Jungkook again as your new year’s resolution.

__________________________________

Maybe because there was no one to talk to about your new year’s resolution in full but getting over Jungkook was pretty easy. You hadn’t spoken to anyone in the pack in over a month and the memories of them become less and less clear by the day. Was it Jin that helped you with your injuries or Yoongi? Was it Namjoon that drove you home or did Hoseok tag along also? And did you actually feel sparks when Jungkook touched you or was it just your imagination? Either way, it felt good to feel less crazy. It was only when you and Jennie hung out that everything would hit you like a freight train. Seeing her was bittersweet. You were so happy to spend time with your best friend despite your guys’ schedule but you couldn’t help this building of resentment in your chest at the same time. Anger and guilt gnawed at you so raw that replying to her texts took hours to do. Luckily, both of you were so busy with work that seeing each other was few and far between.

One thing you had a really hard time forgetting was the night you had to leave. After Jungkook asked you to wait, you sat by his side and watched him catch his breath. It was hard seeing someone in so much pain despite the lack of physical wounds. Once Jungkook seemed to have a grip on himself, he told you to sit as far away from him as possible while he sat on the other side of the cabin. You remembered feeling like you were naked under his red gaze, like he could see every single movement you made. Jungkook told you that it wasn’t safe for you to leave yet and that you had to wait for a little bit. Unbeknownst to you, Jungkook couldn’t have you leave just yet. A wolf in the midst of his heat finally meeting his mate after being kept away from them was like a ticking time bomb. Jungkook needed to engulf your scent and calm his mind before letting you go back to a cabin full of fully grown men. He was surprised that you complied and that you kept your composure. Sure, he noticed your trembling hands and shortness of breath but you kept calm and collected. Jungkook needed to direct his attention to something else-anything- and so the small talk began. It started off with what you did for work and ended with Jungkook shit talking his pack mates. When Jungkook felt sane enough, he insisted he carry you home to be safe. You remember flinching when a low growl escaped from Jungkook when you hooked your arms around his neck. You felt his body shake as you wrapped your legs around his waist. It took a minute before he was able to hoist you up and get going. You remembered him being gentle and asking if you were all right the whole way back to the cabin. You remembered him letting you down a couple meters in front of the cabin because Namjoon would’ve killed him if he saw Jungkook and you together.

“Are you going to be okay?” you asked.

Jungkook offered you a nod, his bright red eyes doing the soft smile on his face an injustice. Perhaps it was the darkness playing tricks on your eyesight but Jungkook looked bigger. His muscles were more toned, his hair was thicker and his overall aura was just larger. You felt embarrassed drooling over his physique like some school girl despite almost dying a couple hours ago. Namjoon’s voice from inside the cabin redirected your guys’ attention and you suddenly remembered that it was below freezing outside.

“I-I’m going to go inside now,” you reached out your hand to give Jungkook’s arm a reassuring squeeze but retracted remembering how much he ordered you to not touch him, “goodnight.”

To your surprise, Jungkook reached out instead and caressed your face with both his hands. You closed your eyes and leaned into his touch pathetically. Jungkook left out an exhale of both relief and frustration. Every ounce of control he had was quickly slipping through his fingers. He was teetering towards the edge of danger with you right now. You opened your eyes to see Jungkook watching you but not like he did before. Just a couple of hours ago, you felt like a prey under his gaze. This time, he was looking at you like how Taehyung looked at Jennie.

“Do me a favor?” he asked, his voice almost hoarse.

You nodded and scrunched your eyebrows. What could you possibly do for him? Jungkook felt his stomach drop knowing what he was going to ask of you. The warmth that happened when you guys touched intensified as Jungkook brought your body closer to his. He knew he only had a couple minutes to relish your touch before his heat and his reality would take over again.

“I need you to forget about this night,” he finally said. Although subtle, he felt your pressure lift from his hands. “I need you to forget about me, about my pack, about everything. Make it like I never even existed, and I’ll do the same. Trust me, it’s for the best.”

As cruel as his words already were, Jungkook then sealed it by pressing his lips against yours. You couldn’t help but gasp which, he happily swallowed. A surge of electricity pulsed through you as he deepened the kiss. The heat from his body immediately making you forget how cold it was. As gentle as he was, you remembered his body began to tremble and the slight sting against your bottom lip when his fangs unsheathed.

And that was all you wanted to remember. Perhaps you were a masochist. Of all the memories you chose to forget, you just couldn’t let go of this particular one; no one ever really completes their new year’s resolution anyways. You knew you would never get an answer but it didn’t matter anymore. Every time Jennie saw you, she'd try to ask about Jungkook but you would either change the subject or give her vague answers. You didn't want to know more than you already did.

“Goodnight, Sooyoung!” you chimed.

“Goodnight,” Sooyoung replied with a sympathetic smile, “you should leave soon.”

“I will!” you lied, “see you tomorrow morning.”

Sooyoung hovered by your desk for a few more seconds before heading towards the elevator. It was common for you to stay after work but not for this long. You waved at Sooyoung until the elevator doors finally closed. When you were certain that there was no one else in the office, you closed the document you were pretending to work on and slumped against your chair. A tired sigh left your mouth as you roughly ran your hands against your face. Just as you were accepting your new reality, the past week and a half had you re-questioning your sanity. Being at home recently felt eerie. You were constantly checking over your shoulder and hesitant to sleep with your bedroom door closed. The nightmares you were having didn’t help either. Night after night, you would see the same things in your dream: rogue wolves chasing you and a Jungkook bleeding out to top it off. You’d jolt awake in the middle of the night and could only fall back asleep after taking melatonin. With the nightmares being a daily occurrence, the melatonin had stopped taking effect and you were left trying to calm your racing heart on your own. To your disdain, the only place you felt safe was at work. Your office was high up on the 25th floor and security here was pretty strict. You concluded that your paranoia was from these nightmares but those moments when you felt like someone was watching you felt too real to blame on lack of sleep. You put your head down against your desk and stared at the time displayed on your computer. It was nearing 7:45 and you promised yourself that you’d leave at 8pm. As the minutes ticked by, you tried to come up with some sort of game plan to combat another inevitable sleepless night.

____________________________________

“Jungkook!” Taehyung shouted as he kicked over a half conscious rogue towards Jungkook.

Jungkook caught it mid air and slammed it down onto the ground before ripping its head off. With that being the last rogue, Jungkook and pack were able to finally catch their breath as they examined the graveyard of torn limbs by their feet.

“Where the fuck are they coming from?” Hoseok panted.

Namjoons eyes wavered as he studied the carcasses on the ground. He had no answer for Hoseok. Rogue wolves attack here and there but never had he seen such great numbers. Their appearance usually coincided with the phases of the moon but recently, their attacks had been random and in hoards. He did notice that they foolishly always went for Jungkook first. As strong as Jungkook was, he was not invincible. Namjoon had also taken note of how haggard and tired his pack was from fighting almost everyday. If they didn't find an answer anytime soon, he feared that he would lose a pack member.

Everyone turned their head towards the trees when they heard a branch snap. In the distance, Jungkook caught a flash of white teeth and familiar pitch black eyes.

“I got it!” Jungkook shouted, before running after the rogue.

He was fucking exhausted. He really hoped that this was the last one because he was losing strength and fast. These recent attacks only fuelled his anger because if he had mated with someone of his species, he would’ve tripled in strength by now.

A yelp emitted from the rogue when Jungkook finally caught up and grabbed its legs. Jungkook swung the rogue against a tree, breaking its ribs in the process. As the creature whimpered against the ground, Jungkook winced when he saw that it was laughing.

“What’s so funny?” Jungkook sneered, angry that it was still breathing.

The creature seemed to be mumbling a familiar word over and over again but Jungkook couldn’t figure out what it was saying. Another yelp came out from the rogue as Jungkook kicked its face in. He crouched down and grabbed the creature by its scruff.

“Speak up!” He demanded.

Despite his impressive experience fighting rogues, Jungkook still had a hard time getting used to the disturbing ways these creatures moved and laughed even though they were near death. This rogue had its jaw kicked in and its tongue was hanging out due to the lack of the bottom half of its face. The grip Jungkook had on it tightened when it continued mumbling. Just as he was about to lose his patience trying to unscramble the creatures jargon, Jungkook finally put together what it was mumbling. The rogue seemed to notice the shift in Jungkook’s eyes and laughed even louder.

“I bet she’d taste so good too.” were its last words before Jungkook ripped out its heart.

Jungkook had to get back to Namjoon and let him know what happened.

It was mumbling your name this whole time.

The living room was quiet as the pack tended to their wounds. Jin went around ensuring that everyone was treating their injuries correctly even if it was just a little scratch.

"You need to clean it." Jin sighed, looking at the deep cut on Jungkook's forearm. The cut was his own fault. As Jungkook was ripping the rogues heart out, his arm got caught in the creatures ribs and it carved his arm as he was pulling it out of its chest.

"Just leave it, Jin." Jungkook grumbled, swatting Jin's worried hands away.

Namjoon and Jin exchanged glances, both annoyed and worried about the youngest member but Namjoon didn't have time to adhere to Jungkook's attitude. Thankfully, no one was seriously hurt but who knew when the rogues would come back to attack again.

"So," Yoongi said, sucking his teeth in the process, "anyone here knows what they want?"

Jungkook wanted to hear his members theories before jumping the gun because maybe the rogue was toying with Jungkook or maybe it wasn't even saying your name at all. The silence that followed confirmed Jungkook's fear. No matter what Jungkook did, he just couldn't seem to get away from you. All eyes were on Jungkook when he suddenly cursed.

"They're after her." Jungkook said, his fingers pinching his nose bridge.

"Who?" Jimin asked.

"His mate." Taehyung's grin only grew when Jungkook glared at him.

Amidst Jimin's surprise and the symphony of swear words thrown back and forth between the members, Namjoon felt his heart sink as a wave of deja vu hit him. The younger one failed to notice the sadness in the leaders eyes as he berated his pack mates who were teasing him with swear words.

"They're not after her," Namjoon finally spoke, breaking the fight, "Jungkook, they're after you and then her. They know that you'd go after them if they kill her before you mark her. They're after you first to get you out of the picture. As long as she's unmated, they're going to keep coming."

Namjoon felt a lump grow in his throat as realization washed over each member. All eyes slowly turned towards Jungkook who had his fists balled up. The pressure from his fists made his blood seep out from the cut on his forearm. Why did he have to deal with this? How come you were still intertwined with him despite being away for over a month? What did he have to fucking do to get rid of you for good?

"T-this could be different, Namjoon." Jungkook stammered, his mind moving too quick for his mouth to catch up.

"Jungkook listen to me," Namjoon said picking his words carefully as he approached Jungkook, "only you can stop this. We can't fend them off forever."

Jungkook grit his teeth and felt his breath labour. This wasn't fair. He didn't choose this and it seemed like life wasn't planning on giving him too many options either. Jungkook began to replay the conversation he had with Namjoon after he first discovered you. The blood from Jungkook's cut was now staining his pants as he remembered what Namjoon said about how strong humans were. What a fucking joke.

"I am stopping this! Who here in this room has killed more rogues than me? Huh? Who?!" Jungkook bursted.

Jungkook's brown eyes had now turned into a dark red shade.

"Killing them one will send ten. Killing ten will send a hundred. Killing a hundred will send a thousand. You have the responsibility to save her life," Namjoon argued tiredly, "look at your brothers. Look at you! We are not immortal, Jungkook."

Jungkook jumped up from his seat and grabbed his hair. His ears were now ringing. His responsibility?! He hadn't even marked you yet, why were you now his responsibility? He couldn't help but laugh aloud by how absurd everything and everyone was sounding. You had stolen what seemed like everything away from him-his freedom, his bodily functions and now even his morals. You kept taking from him and now you were his responsibility?

"Jungkook please," Jin pleaded, "can you please put your own ego aside and make a good choice for once in your life?"

Jungkook turned towards Jin and snarled, "Remind me who saved your fucking life just 20 minutes ago? If I hadn't ran to you in time, you would've been shredd-"

"Enough!" Namjoon yelled, "Whether you like it or not, her life is in your hand-"

"I will not be responsible for her death like you were for Irene!"

Within a second, Jungkook was slammed against the wall. His right cheek was throbbing and his nose bloodied. He wasn't sure if he had finished his sentence but the right hook from Namjoon answered that question for him. Before Jungkook could orient himself, Namjoon grabbed Jungkook by the neck and trapped him against the wall again.

"You will never utter her name in that context again do you understand?" Namjoon asked through gritted teeth.

Jungkook licked his lower lip, the taste of his own blood filling his mouth as he did.

"Do you understand?!" Namjoon bellowed, shaking Jungkook.

"Y-yes." Jungkook finally answered.

The older one finally let go but not without giving Jungkook one final shove.

"Have a better attitude tomorrow morning or you fend for yourself from now on." Namjoon threatened before disappearing into his study.

Jungkook kept his eyes on the floor as his members stood around staring at him. Jungkook could only count on one hand how many times he felt ashamed in life, he would now have to count on two hands after tonight. His members didn't say a word to him as they retreated back to their rooms one by one. Taehyung lingered for a little bit longer. He wanted to ring Jungkook out but decided to leave him to sulk all alone. Jungkook watched his blood drip from his nose onto his sweater. Would dying by some disgusting creatures be better than surrendering to fate? One thing was for sure, Jungkook would rather die with his brothers than alone. He turned his head towards the end of the hallway where Namjoon's study was. The searing pain from his broken nose was nothing compared to what he just said to Namjoon.

Namjoon had his head buried in his hands as Jungkook's words echoed in his mind. It had been years since Irene's death but it still pained him like it happened yesterday. He knew the younger one was speaking out of anger but if he only knew how much Namjoon did blame himself.

"You know, I couldn't even mourn her after she died. I think I finally did after three months." Namjoon spoke.

Jungkook figured it was probably the smell from all his blood that alerted Namjoon to his presence. He cautiously walked towards Namjoon and sat in front of him.

"Her death was the first out of the two times I ever regretted taking leadership of our pack." Namjoon continued, looking up to meet the younger ones sad gaze.

"And the second?" Jungkook asked, his voice barely audible.

"Tonight." Namjoon replied.

Jungkook let the uncomfortable silence engulf him. He stared at the picture of Irene resting on the bookshelf behind Namjoon and felt remorse like he had never before. Irene was Namjoon's mate. For years, Namjoon refused to mark her not because he didn't want to-because he did-but because he was afraid of bringing Irene in his world. He thought the best way to protect her was to keep her away. Jungkook had never seen someone love another person the way Namjoon loved Irene. He doted on her and gave her anything she ever wanted, everything except for one. Irene had begged and begged Namjoon to make her his official mate but he always rejected her advances. By the time Namjoon decided to turn a new leaf, it was too late. If Namjoon had marked her, he would've been stronger and maybe could've fought off the pack of rogues. That day, Jungkook and the pack were out hunting. When they came back, the cabin they had built had been ripped apart. The image of Namjoon carrying Irene's bloody body in his arms as he wept and called out her name was forever imprinted in Jungkook's brain. Namjoon's physical state was no better and if they hadn't returned when they did, they would've lost their leader too. Irene was one of the strongest people Jungkook knew. She was brave, unwavering and quick witted. Before Jin met Mina, it was Irene nursing everyone back to health after a fight and braving the forest to find medicine. Irene was strong and she was human.

"I'm really sorry. I didn't mean what I said and I shouldn't have said that," Jungkook apologized tearing his eyes away from Irene, "I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you."

Namjoon smiled. Although brash and somewhat arrogant, Jungkook always meant well at the end of the day. He couldn't even count how many brawls Jungkook got into because someone slightly badmouthed a member of the pack.

"Please, your life will probably end in the next few minutes with the amount of blood you're losing. Just let me punch the other side of your face and we can call it even." Namjoon joked.

Jungkook scoffed and wiped his nose. He really was losing a lot of blood.

"Jungkook, I couldn't save Irene but you have a chance here. Learning to love someone...don't you think that's better than losing someone," Namjoon wanted to laugh when he saw Jungkook flinch at the word 'love', "and if you can't do it for her, do it for me. For Irene."

Jungkook swallowed the lump in his throat, "I-I don't know if I can mark her right away, you have to give me some time."

Namjoon nodded understandingly.

"But I promise," Jungkook sucked in a breath, "I'll protect her with my life."

[jessicaloons]

E P I L O G U E - Invisible String

Masterlist - Previous

Hello lovely people, here it is, the Epilogue. Instead of a classic epilogue you’ll get to join Lizzie and Charles in their life together through the years.

I hope you enjoy reading this final part of Invisible String as much as I enjoyed writing it. The whole journey of Lizzie and Charles meant so much to me, finishing it is heartbreaking but relieving at the same time. I know I sent you in for a looong ride with lots of ups and downs with this one and I thank every single one of you who stayed from the very beginning to end now. But also everyone who joined in along the ride, thank you! And to the people who just recently started reading, thank you for taking time out of your day to start reading over 50 chapters of a fic, that started over a year ago! I loved every single interaction with you guys, the comments, reblogs, chats and anons, thank you so much for showing me/my story so much love!

There are a lot of people to thank, starting with my bestie who first was mildly confused by the fact that I was writing fan fiction, but then become obsessed and hated me when I hurt her precious baby boos (her words!) and literally gobsmacked me once or twice, when my "torturing went too far".

My lovely boyfriend fiancé who I met while being in the middle of writing this amazing story, who supported me and even read my story because he was curious, starting to get super invested in it.

And last, but definitely not least, a H U G E thank you to the person, without who this story wouldn’t even exist. Thank you, thank you, thank you @elisysd for not only writing my favourite fanfics, but also for motivating me to write and release my own! Thank you for being my torture partner in crime, thank you for always helping me out with title names, thank you for reading my new ideas, motivating me to continue and develop them into new stories. Thank you for all the conversations about our stories, new ideas, talks about the races, our shared views on certain people, and the talks about what is going on in the crazy whirlwind that is our life’s! I’m so very grateful that I found Cruel Summer (if you haven’t read it till now, DO IT! My favourite fic out there!) last year and that you started a chat with me, because life hasn’t been the same since then. So one final thank you, for literally EVERYTHING ♥️

And now I wrote enough! Some little blurbs, social media posts and a lot of time jumps are ahead, buckle in and let’s f****** goooo!

10th May 2026:

"Shhh Emmie, we don’t want to wake up mummy now, do we?" I whispered, tickling her tummy "I’m almost done, little princess."

I placed everything on the tray, and tried to lift it with one hand, before I picked up Emmie, making my way to our bedroom. Lizzie was still fast asleep, Arlo at the foot of our bed sitting up, looking at Emmie and me.

"Be a good boy." I looked at him and he laid back down, making no sound "Alright…" I sat down the tray on my side of the bed before I pushed the button to open up the shades, letting in the sun, a little groan letting me know that Lizzie wasn’t liking the light intrusion. Pulling the blanket over her head was the second indicator.

"Way too early…" she mumbled and I had to chuckle, Emmie clapping happily.

"It’s not that early…" I climbed into bed, Emmie in my lap, pulling the tray over.

"Everything before 9 is too early." Lizzie yawned, slowly scrambling up, her hair dishevelled. She took in Emmie and me, a big smile slowly spreading over her face "Good morning my beautiful baby girl." she cooed and our little one wriggled out of my lap, crawling over to her mum, cuddling into her side "Hi Emmie." Lizzie picked her up, cradling her to her chest, kissing her cheek, making our little girl giggle.

"Happy Mother’s day, cara mia." I smiled at them, pulling the tray close and turned a little to grab the bouquet of flowers from my night stand.

Lizzie made big eyes, looking from the breakfast on the tray, to the flowers in my hand to Emmie in her arms.

"Oh Charles… this is… this is wonderful." she whispered, leaning over, brushing her soft lips against mine "I honestly forgot about it… Oh god our mums!" she panicked a little and I cupped her cheek.

"They both get a beautiful bouquet and a bottle of the nicest champagne delivered today. Don’t worry. I talked to them, because I wanted to spend today with you and Emmie… it’s your first Mother’s day after all. Today is special." I smiled at her and she looked at me, glassy eyes and pink cheeks.

"You’re amazing…" she whispered and leaned in, kissing my cheek.

"It wasn’t just me, Emmie helped as well…" I said and Lizzie giggled, looking at our little girl, sitting in her lap and looking up at her with big eyes, smile on her face, eating everything up her mum said.

"You’re amazing too, Emmie." she kissed her chubby cheek.

"Ready to eat something?" I asked and she nodded.

"I’m actually starving."

"Perfect, because I made a lot…" I pulled the tray closer and Lizzie’s eyes widened.

"Watching Jamie Oliver and Gordon Ramsay made a real chef out of you…" she chuckled, grabbing a strawberry "Daddy is spoiling us, baby girl."

"Just wait for dinner and dessert." I wiggled my eyebrows, wiping some strawberry juice from Emmie’s chin.

"Ouhhh, I can’t wait!" Lizzie mumbled, looking through the options of food, while I fed Emmie another Strawberry.

"I was thinking we could do a little boat tour today, but because of the race next week it’s so full everywhere, I don’t want to navigate through it with you two…" I said, playing with Emmie while Lizzie munched on her cheese omelette.

"It’s Emmie’s first home race." Lizzie looked up from her plate, gently pinching Emmie’s cheek "You’ll see daddy race here in Monaco, baby girl. Daddy and his Ferrari."

"Rar-… rari…" Emmie babbled and I dropped the melon slice in my hand, Lizzie almost choking on her orange juice.

"Did she just?" I looked at Lizzie, her big blue orbs staring at our daughter "Princess did you just try to say Ferrari?" I picked her up, looking into her gorgeous face.

"Rari…" Emmie repeated, clapping happily.

"Oh my god Charles! Her first word is Ferrari! Well… almost… but oh my god!” Lizzie cheered "Emmie, baby girl, say Ferrari. Fer-ra-ri…"

"I don’t think it’s that easy, cara mia, you can’t just say a word and sh-…" I began but had to swallow my own words.

"Fr- fri-" Emmie chortled.

"Almost baby girl. Fer-ra-ri…" Lizzie tried again.

"Fr-rari…"

"Yes! You did it!" I chimed, littering Emmie’s chubby cheeks with kisses "My little genius baby girl! Ferrari! Your first word is Ferrari! Can you say 'Forza Ferrari'?"

"Okay, now you’re just reaching." Lizzie chuckled, but I ignored her.

"Fr-rari…" Emmie giggled when I kissed her nose "Fr-rari…"

"You’re just jealous that her first word was Ferrari, not Audi!" I smirked and Lizzie rolled her eyes "My precious little princess! I can’t wait to tell everyone about it!"

I cradled her to my chest, kissing her hair and she giggled happily. Lizzie leaned over, tucking some loose strands of her out of Emmie’s face, smiling at her, kissing her cheek.

"You want to try to say 'Audi'? Au-di…" she whispered and I pulled Emmie away.

"What are you doing, cara mia?" I laughed and she sat up, shrugging her shoulders.

"It was worth a try…"

"Even if she would say Audi, which is a way easier name by the way, so… unfair… but okay, her first word would still be Ferrari!" I looked at her and she was pouting a little, my eyes fell on her plush lips, before I looked in her eyes again.

"What about… we finish breakfast, put Emmie down and then we’re having a thorough discussion about what our baby’s first word was?" her voice sultry, lashes fluttering.

"Mhhh that does sound pretty good to me…" I leaned over, capturing her lips in a steamy kiss, biting her bottom lip a little when I pulled away "But it won’t change the fact that our baby girls first word was Ferrari…"

"Fr-rari!" as if on cue Emmie chimed in and I laughed against Lizzie’s lips, a soft smile on them.

"Ferrari it is…" she sighed.

"Ferrari it is…" I laughed.

"Fr-rari!"

7th September 2026:

"Food?"

"Check."

"Drinks?"

"Check."

"Decoration?"

"Check."

"Birthday cake?"

Silence. So I repeated it again.

"Birthday cake?"

"Umm-…"

"Charles! That was the most important thing! You said you would pick it up! I can’t believe you!" I groaned, walking inside, stopping dead in my tracks, the birthday cake sitting on top of the table.

"Birthday cake? Check." Charles chuckled and I puffed out some air.

"So not funny…" I rolled my eyes.

"Sorry, I had to, because someone is panicking a little… it’s going to be just fine cara mia!" Charles pulled me into him, kissing my cheek "Emmie won’t even remember this day, okay? Relax a little, pretty girl."

"Who says that she won’t remember today?" I cocked an eyebrow and Charles sighed.

"Are you serious? No one remembers their first birthday…"

"It’s just… I want this to be perfect…" I said quietly and he rubbed his hands up and down my sides "She’s one Charles, can you believe it? One!"

"Yeah… the last year went by in a blur… one day she was still in your belly the next we’re already celebrating her first birthday…" he replied and I looked around.

"We should take a picture of her. Before everyone is here and she’s too excited to sit still for a moment… just her, a balloon or two, her cake?" I said and Charles nodded.

"I set up a back ground and you get our little princess ready?" he said and I nodded, walking off, but then I stopped, turning around "You forgot something?"

"Yup…" I cupped his cheeks and kissed him "Thank you, for always calming me down… I love you."

"I love you more…" he whispered against my lips and I smiled "Now, get our little princess…"

I walked downstairs, opening quietly the door to Emmie’s room, pushing the button for the shades to open. I smiled when I saw that she was already awake, sitting in her bed, gorgeous smile on her little face.

"Hi baby girl, look at your little smiley face…" I cooed, leaning down and picking her up.

"Mama…" she said, her voice sweet like honey.

"Ready for your party?" I asked, sitting her down and she clapped happily "Yeah? You know that everyone is coming to see you?"

"Evy-one?" she repeated slowly and I nodded, brushing her wild hair.

"Everyone, that means… pops and gammy, granny as well. Your aunties Sissy, Charlotte and Shima. And of course your uncles Lorenzo, Joris, Daniel, Arthur-…"

"Tur!" she said excitedly almost jumping off the changing table.

"Yeah, Uncle Arthur is coming. And of course Liam and Noah." I smiled at her, kissing her cheek "Alright let’s dress you up and then go and find daddy?"

"Dada!"

"Yes, dada."

After putting her hair in a tiny bun, or rather a little palm, on the top of her head, dressing her into a cute dress I picked Emmie up, walking upstairs, where Charles arranged in the corner a little photo background.

"Oh look at my gorgeous girl! Hi princess." he cooed at her and she leaned over to him and Charles grabbed her, holding her close to his chest "Is that okay?" he looked at me and I nodded.

"I’ll go and get the cake…"

I watched Charles putting Emmie down, playing a little with our girl, and had to smile. He was born to be a father, like I always said. I took some pictures of them before I walked over, setting the cake down in front of Emmie.

"You have to watch her closely… I don’t want a foot in the cake… or hands…"

"I’ll take care, don’t worry…" Charles smiled "Ready?" he looked at me and I nodded, then he let go of Emmie and I took some photos.

"Alright. I think I’ve got it…" I showed Charles the results and he beamed at me.

"Perfect. Now let’s get ready for the party. They should all be here in the next minutes…"

And he was right, not even 20 minutes later the living room was full with our family and we gathered around, singing Happy Birthday for the very first time for Emmie.

February 2027:

"Charles Marc Hervé Perceval Leclerc! Are you serious?!" I sighed and Charles looked sheepishly at me.

"It looked so cute and I thought she doesn’t have one yet…" he said and tried to soften me with his smile.

"Charles! Her room slowly turns into the Ark of Emmie! She has a whole petting zoo full of stuffed animals!" I said as Charles crouched down and handed our toddler the stuffed panda bear. Emmie took it in her arms and cuddled it tight.

"Look! She loves it! As long as she loves it! Cara mia, she’s my pretty princess! Spoiling her is basically my job!" he said and I rolled my eyes.

"I used to be your pretty princess…" I fake pouted and Charles grabbed me by the waist and pulled me into him.

"Oh mon amour, you’re my beautiful queen! And she is our pretty little princess!" he said and kissed me tenderly.

"Mhhh I like the sound of that… my king…" I whispered against his lips, then kissed him again and pushed myself off of him gently. I walked away but stopped in the door "No more toys, Charles! She’s not even 1.5 years old and has already more stuff than 3 toy stores combined!" with that I walked out of the room, but I stayed in the hallway.

"You heard what our queen said, little princess. No more toys for you officially… but rest assured, I’ll bring you more, but that’s our secret!" Charles whispered and Emmie laughed and clapped excitedly.

"CHARLES!" I shouted.

"Oh shit…" he exclaimed.

"Oh shit…" Emmie repeated and I stormed back into her play room "Oh shit, mama. Oh shit, dada!"

"I’m so, so sorry!" Charles said and I glared at him.

"Mami? Dada a stupi io?" Emmie smiled at me and Charles looked flabbergasted.

"Emmie!" I sighed and Charles started grinning.

"No curse words in front of the baby girl I thought, cara mia? What happened to that rule?" he cocked an eyebrow and grinned at me.

"Someone was cutting the line…" I whispered.

"Road rage… I get it." he laughed and then picked up Emmie and pulled me in his arms too "My queen and my princess… I don’t know what I did to deserve this kind of magnificent luck…" he whispered and kissed my temple first and then Emmies cheek, she smiled her almost toothless smile, dimples showing just like her dads.

Bahrain 2027:

"Season opener for the husband on Sunday, charity race for you today with said husband, Max Verstappen, Lewis Hamilton, Jamie Chadwick, Doriane Pin, Maya Weug, Abbi Pulling, Carrie Schreiner and Bianca Bustamate. Excited to be back in the car?" Natalie asked Lizzie who smiled her most beautiful smile.

"Very excited. It’s only 10 laps, so I should be good, but yeah I trained a little with Charles the last weeks and I really hope that I’ll make it." she chuckled.

"First time little Emmie see’s her mummy race, how excited is she?"

"She made huge eyes when she saw me in the race suit and at the seat fitting she pulled at Charles leg and pointed at me, asking why I’m in the car and not he." Lizzie recalled and I had to laugh, thinking about Emmie’s face yesterday.

"So she’s talking now?"

"We’re getting there… but yeah, everyday a little more… if she’s like her dad, she won’t stop talking in no time…"

"It’s good to have you back here, Lizzie. All the best for the little family and of course good luck in the race later! And if I might say that, kick some asses in good old Lizzie fashion." Natalie smiled.

"Thanks, I’ll try my best, I promise!" Lizzie hugged her and walked off, a big smile on her face.

"So I’m the one talking too much?" I cocked an eyebrow and she laughed, kissing my cheek.

"But I love it when you’re talking…"

"Yeah, yeah… let’s go. The race will start soon…" I said, taking her hand, intertwining our fingers.

"It will be fine, you don’t have to worry…" she said, squeezing my hand a little.

"I know… it’s just- it was a risk that you finished your season 2 years ago… and now getting back in the car…" I sighed and she stopped.

"Charles, it’s only 10 laps… I’ll be fine, don’t worry! We talked with the doctor, I’m prepared, we did a lot of workouts-…"

"Mhh… that we did. I liked that." I whispered and she blushed, pinching my side.

"Get your head out of the gutter! We’re racing in 30 minutes!" she rolled her eyes playfully and I laughed.

"Prepare to lose, cara mia."

"Nope. I’m going to kick your ass. All my girls will kick your ass…" she smiled and I pulled her close, kissing her.

"May the best driver win…"

"So Max should win?" she cocked an eyebrow and I pinched her waist.

"Hey!" I pouted and she laughed.

"Let’s go, world champ."

"Did you let her win, because she’s your wife? Be honest." Max wiggled his eyebrows and I laughed.

"Yeah sure and never hear the end of it at home? How she beat me? Definitely not! You couldn’t catch up to her as well!" I looked at him and he scratched his chin.

"Maybe it’s better for us that she’s not in F1 anymore…" he shrugged.

"Yeah, I’m kinda getting used to winning titles." I joked and Max pushed me playfully.

"Yeah, yeah, Ferrari boy. Hold your horses, I’m this close of snatching the title away from you."

"Sure thing, slow bull."

"Ouch, what kind of conversation do I interrupt here?" Lizzie walked up to us and I pulled her in, kissing her gently.

"We just established that we’re pretty damn happy that you’re not in F1 anymore… we like winning and against you… well never mind." Max said and Lizzie laughed.

"Oh you poor boys… maybe I should give Felix a call." I chuckled and Charles shook his head, laughing.

"Please don’t."

"We’ll see." she laughed, walking off when Susie waved her over.

"But in all honesty, this was fun, we should do this more often." Max said as we walked back to the garages and I nodded.

"Definitely. It’s fun and for a good cause, we really-…" I began when a tiny little whirlwind in red ran towards me.

"Papa! Papa!" Emmie’s bright voice made everyone looking for the source of the adorable sound "Uppy!" she stopped in front of me, making grabby hands and puppy eyes.

"Hey my baby girl, you shouldn’t be running around here all alone." I picked her up and she immediately grabbed my face between her chubby, little hands.

"Pop!" she screeched and turned my head to the side, Juergen wiping his eyebrow, sighing relieved.

"And you shouldn’t make Pop sweat like that!" I booped her nose and she started to giggle hysterically, turning her head a little, stopping abruptly when she spotted Max.

"Hi Emmie." he cooed at her and she scrunched up her nose adorably.

"Say hi to Max, princess." I smiled at her and she looked between me and Max for a while before she turned to him, stretching out her hand, poking his cheek.

"Maxie." she said and he nodded.

"You can call me Maxie, that’s alright." Max smiled.

"Maxie…" she repeated and then looked at me "Charlie…"

"Hey! I’m not Charlie! I’m dad-" I began but got interrupted by her giggles.

"Maxie 'nd Charlie." she smiled poking first my cheek, then Max’ "Maxie 'nd Charlie."

"No, Emmie. I’m Daddy, Dad, Pap, Papa, Paps. But not Charlie. Okay? I’m not Charlie." I tried again.

"Charlie… Maxie." she said, nodding.

"Are you really trying to argue with her? You know who her mother is." Max laughed.

"Yep. That I know." I looked at Emmie and kissed her cheek "Thankfully she’s just as adorable as her mum, that saves her."

"Look at you, turned into a big, old softie." Max laughed when Emmie looked at him, a curious look on her face.

"Softie Maxie?"

"No, your daddy, girlie. He’s the softie!"

"No. Maxie softie. Charlie? Down." Emmie turned and looked at me, when she spotted Lizzie a few steps away. I sat her down and looked at her.

"Straight to mum, princess, okay? No detours!"

"Staight to mama." she nodded and bolted off.

I watched her hug Lizzie’s leg who bent down, picking her up. Seeing Lizzie back in a race suit, our daughter on her hip, made me feel all sorts of things and when Max started to laugh next to me, clapping my back I couldn’t stop the grin forming on my lips.

"Oh you’re so down bad for these two…"

"Oh yes… yes I am."

I watched the replay of the final overtake on the screen, Max next to me chuckling.

"Not gonna lie, after that move, I’m not even mad that you won." he said and I wiped my face with a towel.

"I had to try it, could’ve gone wrong as well…" I shrugged a little.

"Not today, you had an extra lucky charm with you." he nodded towards the screen, showing Lizzie with Emmie, wearing her little Ferrari hoodie, in her arms, standing right under the podium.

"Yeah… how could I not win with her around." I smiled.

"Little unfair advantage…" Oscar joked.

"Make your own lucky charm then." Max laughed.

"Hell no. I’m not ready for that!"

"Believe me. You’ll never be, it just works out magically…" I smiled when he was called out on the podium, followed by Max.

I took one last deep breath and stepped out, the cheering of the crowd almost deafening. But when I stepped onto the highest podium, I looked down. Lizzie and Emmie. Both smiling. Both beautiful. Both cheering louder than anyone else.

"DADDY! DADDY!" I heard her sweet voice carrying all the way up to me, almost jumping out of Lizzie’s arms.

I waved at her, blew her a kiss and her smile got even bigger.

"MY DADDY IS WINNER!" she continued and I felt tears well up. Happy tears.

Win or not today. I already won in life. Big time.

May 2027:

Emmie sat up and looked towards the door, her face lighting up.

"Dada!" she looked at me with her big eyes, clapping excitedly as soon as she heard Charles voice.

"Yes, baby girl, dada is home!" I smiled and she giggled happily, scrambling up on her feet, takings some cautious steps towards the door.

"Dada, I comes!" she screeched and made her way to the door.

I laughed and followed her into the hallway where I saw Arthur kneeling down opening his arms, Emmie slowly waddling towards him. The look on her face changed and she scrunched her nose adorably, realising that something wasn’t right. I heard her sigh and shaking her head slightly.

"You not dada." her voice full of disappointment.

"No, Emmie girlie, I’m not dada." Arthur chuckled "Can I still get a hug from my favourite niece?"

"Only niece." Charles said, appearing behind his brother and Emmie’s face lit up instantly.

"Dada!" she screeched happily, bolting towards her dad, ignoring Arthur’s open arms entirely.

"Ouch…" he mumbled and got up, watching how Charles picked up our little girl.

"Hey baby girl." he smiled at her but Emmie cupped his cheeks, studying his face intently, as to make sure that it was really her dada. Charles grinned, letting his baby girl turn his head to all sides.

"You dada!" she smiled after a while and Charles nodded, kissing her chubby cheeks. Emmie giggled and threw her little arms around his neck, cuddling him.

"Yes, I’m dada. I missed you so much, my little princess." Charles whispered, hugging her close, when Emmie pulled away, pointing at Arthur.

"You not dada!" she said accusatory and he sighed.

"No, Emmie, I’m not dada."

"You Arthie!" Emmie smiled a little and he nodded "My Arthie."

"Your Arthie."

"Dada… Arthie kissie." she looked at Charles with her big eyes and he laughed, walking towards his brother, so that Emmie could lean over, kissing Arthur’s cheek "Hi, my Arthie." she smiled and Arthur kissed her head in return.

"Only your Arthie." he smiled.

"But not dada." Emmie shrugged her shoulders, looking at Charles, smiling adorably.

"No. Not dada, I get it." Arthur shook his head and I laughed.

"Don’t be offended, as soon as Charles comes in, I’m forgotten as well. She’s such a daddy’s girl."

"Just like her mum, she’s crazy for me, what can I say?" Charles laughed, walking up to me, kissing me "Hi, cara mia. You look gorgeous today... you’re glowing!"

"Mama pwetty." Emmie chirped and Charles nodded.

"Mama super pretty, just like my little Emmie." he cooed at her, making her chubby cheeks turn pink "And now you’re blushing just like your mama." she giggled and hid her face in his neck and he sighed contently "You have no idea how happy I am to be back home."

I woke up from Emmie’s faint crying, hastily scrambling up, just to see that Charles was already leaving the room. I sat up, switching the light on, listening into the now quiet penthouse. A couple of moments later, the soft thuds of Emmie’s steps towards our bedroom made me smile. She poked her head around the corner, looking into the room, sighing happily when she saw me and then bolted straight for the bed. I pulled her up, sitting her in my lap and tugged some wild strands of hair out of her face, behind her ears.

"What is it princess? Did you have a bad dream?" I cooed and she nodded.

"Bad fishies…" she mumbled and I kissed her forehead "They meanies."

"What did the bad fishies do?"

"Didn’t lets me play."

"No! How rude!" I gasped and she nodded.

"Emmie?" Charles looked through the door and then smiled "Hey, I was looking for you. I’ve got your princess cup…" he walked over, handing her her little cup and she grabbed it happily, drinking some water "Come on. I’ll get you back to bed and then I’ll tell you what to do next time those fishies are mean!" he held out his hand but Emmie cuddled up into my chest.

"Nu-uh…" she shook her head a little, handing me her cup and I put it down on the night stand.

"Nu-uh?" Charles repeated and she pulled away, sliding down my lap, onto the bed.

"I sleeps here." Emmie patted the mattress next to her, already making herself comfortable.

"Yeah?" Charles asked and she nodded, pulling the blanket up.

"Lightses off." she said and I had to chuckle "Pwease?"

"Can I get in bed before mum switches off the light? I don’t want to stub my toe…" Charles walked around the bed, laying down "Alright." he pulled up the blanket and snuggled into the sheets before he pulled Emmie over, cradling her against him, making her giggle.

"Lightses off now?" her voice muffled.

"Lightses off now." Charles confirmed and I switched off the light, scooting a little closer.

"Good night, my cute little Emmie." I whispered against her head, kissing her.

"Nighty mama." she yawned and Charles kissed her forehead "Nighty dada."

"Good night, my princess." he whispered and then looked up, smiling at me "Good night, my queen."

July 2027:

Pregnant. The second test showing the same result. The mood swings, stomach bugs, my overly emotional state at times, it all made sense now.

"Whats dis?" Emmie asked, looking at the test in my hand "Is it toy?"

"No girlie, no toy…" I breathed out and she scowled a little.

"Why no toy?"

"Because not everything is a new toy for you."

"Dada always buys toys…"

"Yeah, because dada can’t resist your puppy eyes!" I chuckled, looking down at her.

"New puppy for Emmie?"

"No. Not a new puppy for you. It’s- umm well it’s… it’s something for mum and dad." I smiled at her "But you know what? It’s not a toy, but you’ll be able to play with it still in some time…"

She happily clapped her hands, beaming up at me.

"Tank you Mama for new toy."

"Not a toy, Emmie." I leaned down, cupping her cheek "A little brother or sister…"

"You’re pregnant?"

I flinched and looked up at Charles standing in the bathroom door frame, wide eyed, looking at me.

"Umm…" I grabbed the pregnancy tests and handed him the two sticks "Yeah…"

"We’re having another baby?" Charles breathed out, his eyes wandering between the tests in his hand, me and then Emmie on the floor.

"Looks like it…" I said quietly "Is that okay? I mean-… we talked about it… but never about the when…"

"It’s perfect, cara mia…" he stepped closer, cupping my cheeks "We’re having another little one…" he kissed me and Emmie got up, pinching his leg.

"Want kissie too." she pouted and Charles picked her up, tickling her belly.

"You’re going to be a big sister, princess. Are you excited? You’re getting a little brother or sister!" he cooed at her kissing her chubby cheeks.

"Big sis-sissie?" she tilted her head a little.

"Big sister, munchkin." I said slowly.

"Big sista…" she repeated and I smiled.

"That’s it. Well done pretty girl." Charles kissed her cheek again "You’re going to be an amazing big sister, I just know it!"

"The bestest!" she chirped.

"The best, girlie. It’s just the best."

"Na-uh… bestest." she shook her head and cuddled into Charles chest "Bestest, bestest, bestest."

"Okay… bestest is it- for now." he said and Emmie giggled, kissing his cheek, wrapping her arms around his neck.

"Emmies always right." she said and I laughed.

"She’s 100 per cent your daughter!" Charles and I said in unison and then laughed even more.

"Daddy, down pwease." Emmie said and Charles sat her down "Arlooo… me’s a be big sista…" she shouted, running away.

"Ready for another one?" I asked and Charles grabbed me by the waist, pulling me close.

"Another little trouble maker? I can’t wait… I think we can handle two…" he kissed me and then leaned his forehead against mine "I love you, cara mia. You, Emmie and the little one in your belly… I can’t wait for another baby…"

"Then I call the doctor for an appointment…" I whispered and he nodded.

"I want to be here for the first ultrasound…" Charles whispered back and I smiled.

"I’ll make sure of it… even if it might take a little longer then." I pecked his lips and he smiled.

"And there… oh there they are!" the nurse said and my eyes widened.

"They?" I asked and Charles looked confused.

"Yes, here we have baby number one and here is baby number two. Congratulations, you’re having twins!" the nurse smiled.

"Twins?" Charles repeated.

"Yes, Mr. Leclerc, you and your wife are having twins!" she nodded.

"How?" he asked and the nurse laughed.

"Happened the same way like it did with your daughter…" she chuckled and got up "I’ll leave you alone. If you’re dressed come up to the front desk."

"Charles, hey? Pretty boy, are you alright?" I asked as Charles sat next to me, visibly panicking.

"Twins, cara mia! Twins! I barely kept Emmie alive! How am I supposed to take care of two babies at the same time?" he said with a worry laced voice.

"Did I miss something?" I chuckled and Charles looks at me confused "Am I leaving and you’re alone with them? Besides, 'barely kept Emmie alive'? Charles you were born to be a dad! You were so very good at it, you know how jealous I was at times!"

"Yeah for absolute no reason…" he rolled his eyes a little and I sighed.

"We both did good, okay? Emmie turned out just great and with these two it will be just the same…" I cupped his cheek, rubbing circles on it "It’s going to be fine… okay?"

"Twins, cara mia… can you believe it?" he whispered and I sighed a little.

"I’m going to get so huge… blue whale like…" I mumbled.

"Beautiful. You’re going to be so freaking beautiful. Like you always are, just with a little more-…"

"… fat on the ribs and basically everywhere?" I groaned.

"Hey, stop that!" he pinched my waist "I wanted to say just with a little more of that gorgeous glow you had when you were pregnant with Lizzie… you’re going to be the most beautiful girl out there cara mia… you and Emmie of course." he kissed me and I had to smile.

"Three little rascals…"

"Three little rascals…"

May 2031:

"Why do you look so nervous?" Lizzie asked and I shook my head slightly "She’ll be fine…"

"How do you know?"

"Because she’s our daughter?" she chuckled and I rolled my eyes "She’ll be fine." she said again, cupping my cheek "You taught her everything she needs to know."

"I hope so…" I said underneath my breath and watched as the race director waved the flag, signalling for the race to start.

I closed my eyes and took one last deep breath before I watched the race unfold before our eyes. Emmie was fearless as well as ruthless, making up 5 positions in the first few corners.

"Fucking hell…" Arthur let out next to me, his eyes widening in horror when he heard the loud gasp from Elio on his shoulders.

"Arthi said bad word!" he chirped and I glared at Arthur.

"Yes Arthur, you said a very bad word!"

"Fucking hell!" Enzo said proudly, leaning his back against Lizzie, swinging his dangling legs back and forth.

"Enzo!" Lizzie warned him and he rolled his eyes groaning "Mister!"

"Fucking hell…" he repeated and Arthur mouthed an apology towards me.

"Enzo Doetterer-Leclerc. Stop it." I picked him up from the banister he was sitting on, making him look at me "No bad words. And no bad attitude."

"Yous boring." he mumbled, poking my cheek "Arthi funny."

"Nope, little man. I said a bad word. We don’t say bad words. Mum and Dad are right." Arthur tried it and Enzo sighed.

"Yous boring too."

"And you’re a little menace." I tickled his sites, making him giggle.

"Stop! Paps stop!" he laughed but I kept going "Not saying bad wordses again! Pomis!"

"You promise me?" I stopped, looking at him and he nodded.

"Pomis."

"Okay, now let’s watch your sister…"

"… winning her first race…" Lizzie finished and I followed her look, watching Emmie starting her last lap, a huge gap between her and the rest.

The moment Emmie crossed the finish line and stopped her kart, she jumped out, running towards us, happily screaming.

"I won! I won! Did you see that? I wooon!" she pulled her helmet off, hairs standing up in all directions "I WON!"

"You did amazing, Ems!" Arthur pinched her cheek a little and she chuckled.

"Did you see that?" Emmie looked at me and I nodded, hugging her.

"You were amazing princess!"

"We’re so proud of you!" Lizzie bend down, kissing her cheek "So, so proud."

Emmie smiled and wiped her face with a towel Lizzie handed her and then grinned.

"I kicked the boys asses." she chuckled and Lizzie pressed her lips into a thin line, trying her best not to laugh "They didn’t even had a chance."

"You’re a menace too." I said and Arthur laughed.

"Look what you guys did. Created 3 little menaces to the society." he nudged my shoulder.

"That we did."

May 2033:

I watched the twins getting into their race gear. Both with a big smile on their faces, chatting overly excited with Arthur and Pops.

"Dad?" Emmie poked my side and I looked down at her "Mummy is looking for you. She’s talking to Maxie."

"Please tell me you said Maxie to him…" I chuckled and she grinned "Good girl. Go help your brothers we’ll be there any minute." I kissed her head and she sauntered off, pinching her brothers as soon as she was close enough.

I looked around, finding Lizzie and Max standing at the exit, talking away.

"Hi Maxie." I said, chuckling when he rolled his eyes.

"Your kids can call me that, you? Definitely not."

"Oh come on, Maxie. Don’t be a party pooper."

"Lizzie, tell your husband to stop." Max looked at her and she just held up her hands.

"I didn’t want to get dragged in between you almost 30 years ago, I don’t want to get dragged between you now. You two are big boys. Behave." she chided and I laughed.

"I’ll tell you something. I’m only allowed to call you Maxie if I win the title this year, equalling with your 5 titles."

"Deal." Max said with not hesitation and I cocked an eyebrow "Mate your car is… well it’s not shit like at some seasons in the past… god just think back at 2023-…"

"Or 2020!" Lizzie added.

"My point is. 8 races in and you won how many? One? Only Monaco… I mean…" he shrugged.

"Just out of spite I have to win now." I said and Lizzie laughed.

"Look what you made him do…"

"You should’ve just retired like me last season." Max said, scratching his chin but I shook my head.

"No, I could feel that I have one more title in me. And I’ll win it, to prove you wrong. And then I’ll call you Maxie all the damn time." I punched his arm and he laughed.

"Alright. If you say so… for now I want to see our boys race. Let’s go." he said and I nodded, taking Lizzie’s hand.

"Let’s just hope these boys are not like you two…" she chuckled and Max and I looked at her "What? You were track terrors… and whoever got caught in between you two? Yeah no…"

"You were worse than us!" I chuckled and Max nodded.

"Yeah… if all, we have to hope that they are not like you!" he said and Lizzie glared at us "Oh… there it is, the Lizzie-death-glare… I wish I could say I’m not scared but… that would be a lie."

"Yeah, now imagine being married to her!" I said and Lizzie pinched my side.

"If you boys are ready now? There are 3 boys about to race and I don’t want to miss that…" she stomped away and I sighed.

"You know that I’ll have to pay for that back at home…" I chuckled and Max laughed, following Lizzie.

I sat down next to Lizzie on the bleachers, Emmie, Arthur and Juergen in front of us. Max sat down next to us and we watched excitedly the race start. Enzo leading into turn 1.

"He’s really good." Max commented and I smiled proudly.

"That he is."

"Just like his dad…" Lizzie said, and I threw my arm around her shoulder pulling her close.

"And like his mum!" I kissed her cheek, watching Enzo increasing the gap "But damn he’s fast…"

"That’s because he’s fearless… look, he’s almost not braking at all in the corners…" Arthur said.

He was right. Enzo was fearless, going into corners almost at full speed, dive bombing later than anyone I’ve ever seen. He won the race by such a big margin that he already had parked his kart and got out when Max’ son, Eric, parked behind him, followed by Elio.

"What a race…" Max clapped his hands and got up, and we walked down to our sons "Arthur is right, you know? Enzo is fearless…"

"He is. Not sure I like that…" I replied and he chuckled a little.

"Yeah… I feel you…"

"But then again. If he continues like this? He could make it pretty far…" I said as we stepped on the track, Enzo, Eric and Eli joking around.

"Yeah, if he wants to." Max said, taking Eric’s helmet "Hey buddy, good race."

"Yeah, couldn’t catch Enzo though… he’s crazy…" Eric said and Enzo chuckled, handing me his helmet "You drive into the corners without braking!"

"That’s how you win!" Enzo shrugged his shoulders and I chuckled.

"Or end up in a wall." Elio said and his brother rolled his eyes.

"It won’t happen, your brother is not stupid." I said and Lizzie chuckled next to me.

"Yeah… he’s not his dad…" she said and Max and Arthur began to laugh.

"Very funny…" I rolled my eyes when the race director waved at us "Boys, you’re needed…"

I ruffled the boys hair and they ran off, stepping on the little makeshift podium. It was the seventh race of the season and already the sixth win for Enzo, who got better each week. He jumped excitedly up and down on the top step on the podium waving at us happily.

"Look at him… he reminds me so much of you…" Juergen said, standing next to me "Whenever you were on the podium you were super giddy and couldn’t contain your excitement."

"He loves it… racing, the speed, the adrenaline, winning… Elio on the other hand…" I began and he nodded.

"He loves it too, but for him it’s more a hobby… while for Enzo… it’s everything."

He was right. Elio had fun. He enjoyed karting. But apart from the track, his mind wasn’t occupied with karting, not like his brothers, who couldn’t stop talking about karting, or racing in general. Enzo lifted his trophy over his head and cheered happily, waving at us and I smiled.

"Look dad! Another one!" he screeched, running over to us.

"Soon you’ll need a whole trophy cabinet!" I said and he nodded.

"Or I can put them next to yours and mum’s trophies in your trophy room?" he looked at me with big eyes, when Elio joined us, smiling shyly, presenting his smaller trophy.

"I tell you what, both of you, and Emmie, get a shelf in our trophy room…" I said and they both beamed up at me, running off again.

"You have a trophy room? Like… seriously?" Max asked and Lizzie cocked an eyebrow.

"Where? In our penthouse? You mean your office/ studio/ storage room? Where all of our trophies are kept in boxes?" she asked and I laughed.

"I mean… we could turn it into a trophy room." I shrugged my shoulders and she laughed.

"Sure. You do that…" she replied and I groaned "Your idea, you told your kids, so you do that…"

"Pops?" I looked at Juergen who just chuckled.

"Sure, I’ll help you… and maybe you can put your fifth world champion trophy in at the end of the year…"

"Let’s hope so…"

June 2038:

I watched as Emmie practically beamed at him, hanging at his lips, soaking in every word he said. I groaned a little and Lizzie looked up from adjusting Enzo’s helmet.

"What?" she asked and followed my look, then she chuckled.

"Do you see how she looks at him? She’s too young for these kinda looks!" I muttered.

"Charles, she has a crush on him! At her age I already had a huge crush on you too!" she laughed but I shook my head.

"That’s different… we knew each other for almost 5 years at her age! And I wasn’t so… so…" I rambled and Lizzie laughed even more.

"So what?" she asked and I sighed.

"So slimy! God, look how he laughs!" I groaned.

"Enzo, you’re all good, why don’t you go to Arthur, he’ll help you with your kart…" Lizzie send Enzo away "Love? She’s 13. She has a crush on Nick. That’s it. They won’t get married tomorrow. So relax, please."

"He won’t marry her in 10 years either! Never. I don’t like that boy!" I huffed out and Lizzie rolled her eyes. Both watching as Emmie put her helmet on, walking towards Enzo and Arthur. "Alright. I’ll be right back."

"Charles! Be nice!" Lizzie whisper shouts at me as I made my way over to Nick, but I just waved her off. The boy was about to grab his helmet as I grabbed it first, handing it to him.

"Here you go…" I said and Nick made big eyes.

"Th-thank you Mr. Leclerc…" he stuttered and I smiled at him. As he put his helmet on and sat down in his kart I crouched down next to him.

"That’s a nice kart you’re having. Looks fast." I said with an overly friendly voice.

"My dad and uncle worked on it together." he said nervously and I nodded.

"I saw you talking to Emmie, yeah, you know, she’s a tough girl. Ruthless on track. Very talented. Fast." I stated casually, checking his engine out "But you see, no matter how old she is, she’ll always be my little princess… and if everyone were to hurt her, make her sad, god forbid, break her heart? Make her cry… oh well."

"I don’t know what you mean… Emmie is… she’s great… but I didn’t…" he began to ramble but I just held up my hand, making him stop abruptly.

"What I’m saying, Nick, is… that’s a really nice kart you’re having… if you want to keep it that way… you better be as sweet as honey to my Emmie…" I smiled at him and got up "Because during these karting races accidents happen so fast…" I gently closed his visor "Good luck, Nick!" I said loudly and Lizzie looked over, smiling at me.

She didn’t have to know everything that I’m doing.

July 2037:

I watched as the kids cuddled him, one by one. Scratching his ears. Showering him with kisses.

"What did the doctor say?" Lizzie whispered and gently stroked by back, holding my hand.

"He won’t make the night. He said we should give him all his favourite treats…" I answered, voice broken and hoarse.

"I can stay with you? Lorenzo and Charlotte can pick up the kids and I stay with you and then we’ll go tomorrow together…" she began but I shook my head.

"You should be with them, they shouldn’t be alone…" I whispered and Lizzie nodded, kissing my cheek, wiping away some stray tears.

She walked down the lawn, sat down next to the kids and cuddled Arlo. His ears immediately stood up, of course, his mum was there. After a while they all said their final goodbyes, coming back in, Emmie hugged me immediately.

"You’ll stay with him, right? He won’t be alone?" she cried and I nodded.

"He won’t be alone, no. Not a single moment." I kissed her head and the twins squeezed right into our hug.

"Will he be in pain?" Elio’s voice barely above a whisper.

"No, little one. The doc gave him some medicine. He won’t feel anything. He will fall asleep…" I began and Enzo cried out.

"And then he won’t wake up anymore?" he asked and I nodded.

"He won’t." I swallowed hard and Lizzie gave Arlo one last kiss, then walked inside.

"We have to go now, come on. Dad will take care of our good boy." her voice was laced with tiny sobs. The kids slowly pulled away and I kissed them one by one on the forehead as they headed into the foyer, grabbing their bags.

"Will you be okay?" Lizzie whispered, pulling me into a tight embrace and I felt tears streaming down both our faces.

"Yeah… I’ll see you tomorrow…" one last kiss and she left with the kids.

I took a deep breath and walked outside, sat down next to Arlo on the soft lawn, the setting sun shining softly above us. He held up his head, tilting it a little and it reminded me of the day where I brought him home to our old flat. How I couldn’t tame him and knew that he would be a piece of work. All those years ago. Lizzie’s eyes, when she saw him, lighting up. The tears she cried. Happy tears. So many happy tears. The moments when Lizzie was pregnant first with Emmie, later with the twins. How protective Arlo was. Always looking out for his mum. Always putting his head on her belly. I scratched him behind his ears and he closed his eyes. Laying his head in my lap.

"Good boy. My Arlo. You can rest now. You took care of your mum and the kids whenever I couldn’t be here. Thank you, my sweet boy. I love you." I leaned down, kissing his head. I could hear his breathing becoming more shallow with every breath he took. I kept on stroking his soft fur. Giving him belly rubs. Kissing his head. Thinking about all the memories our little fur baby gifted us with. "I will miss you, Arlo. I love you. So much!" I whispered after a while and looked down. Watching closely. He wasn’t breathing anymore. Realising that he was gone "Goodbye, my Arlo."

September 2041:

"What’s up?" I asked, looking at Charles who just walked in "You look like you’ve seen a ghost?"

"That was John… he offered me the position as director of the FDA… starting next season…" Charles said and Enzo looked up from his iPad.

"Oh wow! Congrats Charles!" I got up from the barstool and kissed his cheek.

"Thanks…" he mumbled and I looked at him.

"You don’t sound too happy? You don’t want to do it?" I asked, but he shook his head.

"No, of course I’m happy. It’s just…" he stopped and looked at Enzo.

"I have to work now even harder… or people will say that I only got into the FDA because of you…" he said and Charles nodded.

"But that’s ridiculous. Everyone can see how talented you are. Also, you’re only 13… you won’t make it into the FDA for the next two or three years anyways…" I said, patting his arm but he sighed.

"Your mum is right, Enzo. Also, just because someone is in the FDA, doesn’t grant them a seat in a car." Charles said and I nodded.

"Yeah… sure." Enzo smiled and got up, hugging him "Congrats dad." he then grabbed his iPad and left the kitchen.

"Hey? It’s going to be just fine, okay? He’s talented. One of the best, if not the best… no one will think otherwise." I snaked my arms around Charles neck, pulling him closer "I’m so proud of you, my pretty boy."

"Thanks, cara mia." he smiled and kissed him, then he leaned his forehead against mine and he exhaled loudly "He really is the best right now… if he continues like this? Prema is already interested, also Carlin…"

"See? And that all without your help…"

"It’s 50% of my DNA in him, so I’d say a little of my help…" he laughed and I shook my head.

"You’re an idiot… but a cute one… so, yeah… that’s fine…"

September 2044:

"Okay… what’s going on here?" Enzo asked after a while, looking at Elio then at me "You said that there is something important we need to talk about, now we’re sitting here for ten minutes and nothing happened… I could sit in the simulator, you know?"

"Enzo!" I glared at him and he rolled his eyes a little.

"Sorry. But-… whatever." he groaned, crossed his arms and leaned back in the sofa.

"Elio, sweetheart? What is it?" Lizzie asked him quietly, smiling at him and he looked at me.

"It’s okay, take your time…" I encouraged him and he took a deep breath, closing his eyes.

"Maybe not that much time, Nick is going to pick me up in… half an hour." Emmie said, looking at her phone.

"Nick?" I looked at her and Lizzie shook her head "And where are you and Nick going?"

"To Clara, she’s having a party with drugs and alcohol." Emmie rolled her eyes and I glared at her "We’re just going to the movies…"

"To the movies?" I repeated and she nodded.

"Charles? We’re here because of Elio, remember? So… focus." Lizzie said and I knew that tone.

"Can Elio then please speak up?" Enzo said and Emmie nodded.

"Yeah, I’m not done with my hairs yet…"

"Guys!" Lizzie and I said.

"I’m gay." Elio blurted out and the silence was loud.

He looked at me, then Lizzie, Emmie, both smiling, and lastly Enzo, who didn’t react at all.

"That’s wonderful, sweetheart. Thanks for telling us!" Lizzie got up and kissed his cheek, followed by Emmie, who hugged him.

"You’re damn brave, little bro." she chuckled and he smiled at her.

Enzo still didn’t react and I was about to say something, when Elio beat me to it.

"Zo?" he asked quietly.

"What? I thought you would tell us a secret or something?" Enzo replied and we looked at him.

"What do you mean?" Elio asked.

"You think I didn’t knew? We shared a womb, dumbass? I think I knew it before you knew it yourself. My point is. More girls for me, because now all the girls who like the tortured poet that is you, will come to me now… thanks for that, El." Enzo got up, clapped his brothers back and walked away "I’m in the sim… Singapore is next…"

"Unbelievable…" Emmie shook her head, kissing Elio’s cheek "Love you." then she was gone as well.

"Umm- I guess that’s it then?" Elio shrugged, following Emmie.

"That was…" I began but then shrugged.

"Well, they’re clearly your kids…" Lizzie chuckled "Or at least Enzo through and through…"

"Not gonna argue with that."

Monaco 2046:

"Why are you so nervous?" Emmie put down her headphones, watching Enzo anxiously replaying old videos from the Monaco Grand Prix "You know those streets better than anyone else? Dad used to drive the track with us almost daily when we were younger…"

"It’s not the same like in an F2 car! Especially after having 3 shitty races in a row… and after all it’s Monaco… not the easiest track for our family…" he mumbled and Charles rolled his eyes a little.

"Ooouuuhhh you touched there a sore spot, Enzo." I said and Charles glared at me "Oh don’t look at me like that."

"You should’ve never mentioned this stupid statistic…"

"First of all, I didn’t mention anything, it’s all over the internet and second of all, it’s not a statistic, it’s a curse-…" I began but he interrupted me.

"Curses don’t exist! You’re all too superstitious."

"Oh really? We are superstitious?" I cocked an eyebrow and our kids looked between us.

"Yeah, you are, curses don’t exist, stupid rituals or whatever don’t help… it’s just about you and the car and your abilities… nothing else!"

"Says the guy who wore red pants on every quali day because he wore red pants when he got his first pole."

"That was not because of that…" Charles protested but one look and he stopped.

"And then stopped wearing red pants on quail day because during a shitty season 2023, when nothing worked out for him he once didn’t wear red pants on quali day and got pole position… the next time he forgot them, he got pole position again and from then on he never wore red pants on quali day…"

"Whatever." Charles groaned and I had to chuckle.

"Just admit it, you were just as superstitious like the rest of us!"

"Nope." he shook his head.

"Oh come on dad, not even a little?" Emmie looked at him, big puppy eyes on full display.

"I mean… I just don’t believe in it…" he sighed.

"Maybe that’s the topic of my next podcast? Drivers and their rituals and superstitions?" she thought and I nodded.

"That would be interesting! You should talk to Arthur, he also had a weird ritual…" I smiled at Emmie and she already scribbled something down in her little notebook.

"Didn’t uncle Arthur also crash out in Monaco?" Elio asked, looking up from his phone and I nodded "But you didn’t? Not in F2 not in F1?… well maybe it’s just a Leclerc curse then… therefore Enzo you’re cursed."

"Okay, stop that now!" Charles rolled his eyes, glaring at me "Look what you’ve started!"

"Me? I didn’t start shit!" I said

"Language!" Enzo, Emmie and Elio said in unison, cackling away.

"Very funny…"

"Hey, you made us watch that old movie! What was it called? Aviators?" Elio asked.

"Avengers." Charles and I said and he grinned at me.

"Same thing." Elio mumbled.

"We kinda lose the plot here! Dad’s Monaco curse and Enzo shitting his pants driving here." Emmie wiggled her eyebrows at her little brother, who threw a bread roll at her.

"Enzo Doetterer-Leclerc! We do not treat food like that!" I reprimanded him.

"Sorry… but she’s egging me on! And it’s-it’s…" I saw how frustrated he was, but before I could react Elio already seemed to be having an idea.

"If it’s a Monaco curse and that only applies to Leclerc drivers… maybe you dropped the wrong last name then? Maybe for now you should go by Doetterer." he said matter of factly and I looked at Charles, his jaw clenched, a muscle ticking.

"If you want to drop my name, because you want to driver under your mums name? Fine by me. If you drop your name because of a stupid, not-existing curse… that’s something different…" he looked at Enzo who shrunk a little under his dad’s gaze.

"No one is dropping anyone’s name. You chose Leclerc, and I get it, shorter, easier to pronounce, the name of a five time world champion. Also 5 time winner of the Monaco Grand Prix! You studied the track, and now you get into your car and you focus on nothing else but the car and the track. Whatever happens then, happens." I said and Enzo sighed.

"I just want to make you guys proud…" he mumbled and Charles look softened, grabbing him by the shoulders.

"We are proud of you, Enzo! It’s not so easy coming fresh out of F3 and your fourth race in F2 is already Monaco, but you’ll manage, okay? And if not? That’s also not the end of the world… it took me years to even finish our home race…" he said and Enzo nodded slowly.

"It’s going to be fine, Enzo, you’ll see." I said and he got up.

"And if not, you’re just continuing a family tradition." Emmie laughed and walked away, dodging another bread roll.

"Don’t listen to her. Your mum is right, it’s going to be just fine." Charles smiled at Enzo who just sighed "Let’s watch the races together. Maybe I have some tips and tricks on what to do…"

"Rather on what not to do…" I chuckled quietly, a bread roll hitting me straight at the temple.

"You deserved that one…"

October 2046:

"Dad? What are you doing here?" he was surprised, I could tell.

"I wanted to see your work." I answered simply and he looked at me confused "Jo told me that you asked him for advice, what pictures to choose. And then I found the flyer in the rubbish bin. Crumpled."

"I mean, I know how busy you are with the FDA and Enzo in F2 now, preparing for F1 next season." he mumbled and I just shook my head.

"Elio, I’ll always make room for you and your passion. If I know about it…" I said and he nodded sheepishly.

"I know… it’s just that…" he began but then stopped.

"That what?" I asked and he sighed.

"I just thought that this is nothing that would interest you… I mean Emmie is studying sports journalism. Has her F1 podcast and blog, everyone loves her and she has so many subscriptions! Enzo is stepping right into yours and mums shoes, starting in F1 next year. And me? I’m not in any way like them. I like F1. As a fan to watch. But that’s it. I just thought that…" he said and now I sighed.

"You thought what? That I wouldn’t be proud of you, wouldn’t be interested in what you’re doing because it’s not F1 related?" I asked and he nodded and looked down "How many times do I have to tell you, that I’m proud of you, no matter what! Any passion of yours, is something I’m interested in, Elio."

He swallowed hard and looked up, then he turned a little, pointing behind him.

"Do you want to see my pictures?" he asked and I nodded excitedly.

"Did you know, when I was younger I was also really interested in photography! I just wasn’t as talented as you!" I said and he looked at me.

"I didn’t know that…" he replied and then pointed at the 5 pictures in front of us.

One showing Lizzie and me in our garden, another one was from Enzo as he was breezing past me and Emmie in the feature race of the last Monaco GP, the one in the middle a shot of an old F1 car engine, one from a wild and rough countryside, the last one a busy street in London, with Emmie in front, pointing at something.

"Wow Elio, these are amazing…" I whispered, taking a step closer.

The photographs were impressive. The colours. The contrast. The lighting. I loved every single one.

"Thanks dad… for being here…" Elio said after a while and I looked at him.

"This is what you should do, you know? I think you could be an amazing photograph…" I said and he smiled.

"Yeah… maybe I will one day…"

I left my office, heading downstairs when Stella, John Elkann’s assistant bumped into me.

"Sorry Stella, didn’t see you." I smiled apologetically.

"It’s fine Mr. Leclerc-…"

"Charles. I told you before, it’s just Charles…"

"Charles, of course. Umm do you have a minute?" she asked and I nodded.

"Sure, what’s the matter?"

"Mr. Elkann wants to talk to you. I sent you an invitation for a meeting next week, but we came here this morning on a whim and you know Mr. Elkann…" Stella smiled at me and I followed her.

"Yeah, if you can do it now, do it." I nodded "Do you know about what this meeting is?"

"Umm- I do… but it’s better if he tells you this…" she said shyly and I got nervous "Oh it’s nothing bad!"

"You sure? The big boss comes in just to chat?" I said and she smiled.

"You’ll see. He’s waiting for you." she knocked on the office door and opened it, letting me in.

"Charles, good to see you!" John got up from his chair and hugged me "How are you? The kids? Lizzie?"

"We’re all good, thanks." I smiled, still a little nervous.

"Enzo must be excited, now that he has a seat in F1 next year. It was only logical that we would want our best driver from the academy, soon to be F2 champion in our junior team in F1 next season."

"Yeah, he’s really excited. He is really grateful for this chance, I mean, we all are of course."

"He’ll make us proud, I have no doubt in that."

I smiled and nodded only.

"Okay, I make this quick, I don’t want you to have a heart attack. Charles, you did an amazing job as the director of the FDA, but now we think it’s time for someone new…" he began and I felt my stomach twisting "… because we would like you to step up and become the new team principal of Ferrari."

"Sorry what?" I was confused.

"We want you as team principal for the Scuderia Ferrari, starting next season."

"Me? As team principal? Ferrari. The F1 team?" I almost stuttered and he nodded.

"Yes. You’re the right one for the job. You know the team, the sport. You know how it works. We believe you’ll be amazing… so? What do you say?" John looked at me hopefully and I tilted my head a little.

"If I agree, I have one condition…" I said slowly.

"Of course. What is it?" he asked and I began to smirk.

"Monza. All black suit. All black car. And I mean all black. Not some weird grey patterns on black. Or some black car parts. All black. I’ve been deprived of it my whole career, when I wanted nothing more than to drive an all black car, wearing an all black suit…" I said and John looked at me for a moment before he laughed, leaning back in his chair.

"Oh how I remember the disappointment in your eyes when they showed you the suit for Monza 2025?-…"

"2024… and then 2027 again…" I added.

"… yeah. You hated the 2024 suit. And the livery…" he finished wiping tears away.

"I thought 2023 was bad… but that topped it I think…" I shrugged my shoulders.

"Alright Charles, Monza is black. But not every year, no? But the upcoming season for sure. Do we have a deal then?" he got up, buttoning his jacket close as I got up as well.

"We have a deal." I said shaking his hand.

"Well then it’s official, Charles Leclerc, new team principal of Scuderia Ferrari."

January 2047:

"Elio? There's a letter for you." I put it down in front of him, walking around the kitchen island "Are you coming to Enzo's first race?"

"Huh?" Elio looked up from the envelop in his hands "What?"

I chuckled a little, beginning to slice up some apples, watching him tilting his head a little reminding me of Charles.

"Are you coming to Enzo's first race? I know you're not that into F1 anymore, but I think Enzo wants you there.. it's also your dad's first race as team principal of Ferrari and I know for a fact that he would definitely love to have you there." I smiled at him, and he rubbed his neck, looking nervous "What's going on?"

"Oh umm-it's just… do you remember how I applied for the Parsons School of Design in New York? Studying there would be a dream, although... I mean, chances were little that they even consider me, comparing my photography to those of others? But... mum, they want me.. I'm in..." Elio whispered, and I dropped the knife "I mean... I applied there on a whim, I first need to cheek for scholarships because it's freaking expensive and-..." he began to ramble and I walked back around the island, stopping in front of him.

"I’m so proud of you, Elio. Wow! This is amazing!" I cupped his cheek, kissing it, watching him blush.

"Thanks mum, but it's like I said I have to check if they have scholarsh-…"

"You do know that your dad and I have a little money on the side, right?" I joked and he looked at me "You're going. No scholarship needed. It's noble from you, to think like that, but you don't need it. I'm sure, you would get a scholarship if you would apply for one, but someone might need it more than you..."

"Are you sure? It's expensive? Like really." Elio mumbled, and I laughed.

"Your dad is a 5 time Formula 1 world champion, Ferrari team principal, investor, founder and whatever of god knows what companies, I honestly lost count, and your mum, little old me, also managed to make a little fortune with clever investments and commercial deals and from driving 3 seasons in F1! So yes Elio, l'm sure. And even if not? We could always sell one or two of your dad's cars, I guess that would cover the tuition fees and everything else."

"Who wants to sell my cars for what?" Charles walked in, all sweaty, hair a mess.

"Elio has some big news..." I smiled at our son who nervously grabbed the envelop from the counter.

"Okay? Then shoot..." Charles opened the fridge, grabbing a bottle of water, looking at Elio.

"So umm-... I applied at some universities... and the Parsons School of Design, they have one of the best photography programs worldwide, they accepted me..." Elio said nervously and Charles eyes brightened in an instant.

"The Parsons School of Design in New York? Wow! Elio, I'm so proud of you! Incredible!" he exclaimed, storming over to our son, pulling him into a tight embrace "You worked so hard for this! You deserve this so much, son. I'm really, really proud of you."

"Okay, Mr. Sweaty, can you please take a shower and not smother your sweat all over our son? Thank you!" I pulled Charles away from Elio.

"Hey! I just ran 5 kilometres! Of course I'm sweaty!" he snaked his arm around my waist, pulling me closer "I have to stay in shape for you cara mia..." he then whispered, his warm breath fanning over my skin, eliciting goosebumps all over, before he kissed my jaw.

"Eww! Here are children! Behave for fucks sake!" Enzo walked into the kitchen, fake gagging "Things I don't want to see before breakfast? My parents making out in front of me like horny teenagers!"

"You're just jealous because I landed a pretty girl and you didn’t." Charles laughed, pinching my waist "I'm going to take a shower and tonight we're celebrating you Elio..." he ruffled Elio's hair and was about to leave when he stopped "I still don't know why you want to sell some of my cars?" he looked at me.

"And I don't know why we're celebrating Elio?" Enzo plopped down on the stool next to his brother, eating his cereals "What did you do?"

"You're brother was accepted at the Parsons School of Design..." I said and he made big eyes.

"Are you serious El? Fucking hell, that's one of the best schools! I know that because you talked about it for years now! Congrats little bro!" Enzo side hugged his brother who smiled shyly.

"Thanks, but hey, you're only 3 minutes older, Zo..." Elio rolled his eyes playfully.

"Semantics..." Enzo shrugged his shoulders and I continued cutting the apples.

"Hello? I still want to know why my cars are being sold?"

"It was because of the costs of the school. But don’t worry, I won’t touch your precious cars…" I chuckled and Charles tilted his head, coming closer.

"You could sell them all, just not the F40… that one is special…" he said and I rolled my eyes.

"It’s your favourite car, I know…"

"Yeah, that too… but you bought it for me… so no, that one won’t be sold ever." he whispered and then kissed me, before stepping away "I’m going to take a shower now."

"And I need to wash my eyeballs with bleach…" Enzo mumbled and I saw the mischievous look on Charles face.

"Care to join me under the shower, cara mia?" he said, looking at me challenging.

"Sounds like a good idea. It’s also good for our planet… it saves water…" I put the knife down, grabbed the plate with the apple slices and put it down in front of the twins "Eat your fruits kiddos."

"Let’s go pretty girl, let’s save our planet…" Charles grabbed my hand, pulling me with him.

"One day you have to pay for your children’s therapy!" Enzo shouted after us and we both laughed.

"That’s fine. We can sell a car for that."

Montreal 2047:

"Charles. Round 7 here in Montreal, 2 Ferrari wins, but also 2 Ferrari DNFs. What are your thoughts on the season so far?"

"I think we started out pretty well. The DNFs were unfortunate, but you have to put into account that one was due to a damage after a collision, so I’d say only our DNF in Bahrain, where we had a mechanical issue, is something we need to work on." I answered and knew already what the follow up question would be.

"The collision in Miami you mentioned, was between your driver and your son… how do you handle such a sensitive situation?"

"That’s simple. I don’t. Enzo is not my driver. He has a team principal who talks with him after the races. That’s not my job. My job as his father is to tell him he gave his all and it didn’t work out, the next time it will…"

"But he’s driving for your junior team, I’m sure you have a say as well?"

"No, I don’t. Not my team. Not my place to say something."

"So you don’t think, you should’ve said something to Enzo about his attempt to overtake your driver at a corner that simply isn’t made for that? Which caused your driver to retire from the race? Costing Ferrari precious and well needed points?"

"Again. That’s his team principals job. Not mine. I did my job as his dad and that’s it." I said with finality in my voice, hoping the reporter would understand that he wouldn’t get a different answer from me.

"Thank you, Charles."

I nodded and got out, already seeing Enzo and his group preparing for their press conference. He saw me and rolled his eyes a little and I shrugged my shoulders, walking off towards the Ferrari hospitality where Lizzie sat, going through some timetables and documents

"What a bitch!" her first words and I had to chuckle.

"What did you expect. The Spanish media never liked me… why would they start now." I sat down next to her "What’s all that?"

"That are Mira and Callie’s schedules for the next weeks… who would’ve thought that managing two Formula 1 driver and co-directing the F1 Academy was so difficult." she chuckled and I sighed.

"Yeah well… who would’ve thought that being the team principal of Ferrari would only be my secondary problem and my first one would be my son who’s not even driving for my team…"

"I’m sorry they ask you these kind of questions." Lizzie sat up, cupping my cheek "And I’m sorry that Enzo is a little… well he hates that he’s compared to you all the time, so he’s a little frustrated and you’re the one who…"

"I know. And I’m not even mad at him. I’m sorry for him. But more in a way like… I know what good of a driver he is, I mean… he didn’t win his championships for nothing, but F1 is different. The media is different, the expectations… everything. I just don’t want him to crack under all the pressure." I mumbled and Lizzie rubbed soothing circles on my cheek.

"He’ll manage, you’ll see. He just needs time… and a thick skin." she said and I nodded, right when I saw Enzo picking up his microphone and turned up the volume.

"Julia Andres, ESPN Spain, question for Enzo. Out of the 6 races of this season you already had 3 DNFs, and finished only once in the points. Do you think the criticism from other drivers such as Ward Benton or Paolo Vasquez is justified that you only have a seat in F1 because of your famous father?"

"Well, no it’s not justified, because I’m not just here because of my famous father… also because of my famous mother, who won in 3 Formula 1 seasons more races than Benton and Vasquez have won combined in over 11 seasons together." Enzo answered and some of the journalists laughed. Vasquez on the end of the right side of the sofa only clenched his jaw, glaring at him.

"So you don’t think it’s justified?"

"I worked my ass off to be here. I won every junior championship there is on the first attempt. Did I have it easier than others because I never had to think about the finances and never had to think about if I wouldn’t win the next race a sponsor might drop out and I wouldn’t have the money to continue? Yes. I know how privileged I am. I know that the chance that I have to race now in F1 is huge and I have to step up my game to prove that I deserve it. I know that better than anyone else. But to say I’m only here because of my famous last name? No. Not justified. Because right now my last name is more a curse than a blessing… everyone looks at my races, sees my name and asks themselves and that’s the son of Charles Leclerc and Lizzie Doetterer? So yeah… I know that my results aren’t promising, but I’m working hard on turning my season around…"

"Thank you Enzo…"

He smiled but I knew him better than anyone, I saw how defeated and frustrated he was, his shoulders tense.

"I want to go in there and hit them. All of them…" Lizzie was seething, seeing the pain in Enzo’s eyes.

"He handled that pretty well, better than I would have to be honest." I smiled a little and she nodded.

"Still. These kind of questions are unfair… and Benton and Vasquez? I want to hit them too…"

"It’s okay mama bear. I want to hit them too. Or run them over…" I joked and she chuckled a little, then threw all of her stuff into her bag "And now you’re leaving me to look after him… fair enough…" I got up.

"Mama bear has to look for her cub, no?" she laughed and kissed my cheek when she spotted something behind me and I turned around.

Between our motorhome and the Mercedes one all the drivers from the press conference and some more were standing huddled together, Enzo, Benton, Vasquez in the middle, looking at each other like they would kill one other any minute. I walked towards the exit and opened the door, but stopped when I heard the dispute.

"Just admit it, without your famous Dad, you wouldn’t even be here." Benton rolled his eyes.

"Yeah just that he’s a failed mini Leclerc, right?" Vasquez sneered.

"Mini Leclerc-Doetterer… and at least I’m having my parents last name, they weren’t ashamed of me… can’t say that about you and your old man, never once world champion Carlos Sainz jr." Enzo smiled, everyone now staring at Vasquez "Oh right. I forgot. No one knew who your daddy was… well oops… now they know. Now they all know how you made it to F1… because let’s face it, without your dad and his influence in Williams, you wouldn’t be here… you didn’t even drive in any junior series. Straight from karting to F3 and then without a title nothing into F1. Where you drive now for 4 seasons, and only won one race because of a penalty and two disqualifications."

"I swear to god, Leclerc, shut the fuck up or…" Vasquez began when I cleared my throat, making all the drivers flinch.

"Charles." Marco, one of my drivers said and I looked at him "They were just about to go to our teams."

"Yeah… right." Benton said, pulling Vasquez with him, who glared at me.

"Tell your dad I said hi." I shouted after him and then turned around, only Enzo left, Lizzie behind me looking at him.

"Enzo Leclerc! Do you have anything to say?" she sounded mad, but there was something else in her voice, and if I wasn’t mistaken it sounded a little like pride.

"I’m sick of them asking me the same questions again and again! I’m sick of everyone saying I’m only here because of you!" he said looking at us but I shook my head.

"You can’t listen to that, Enzo. You have to ignore it. They will use that against you again and again."

"I know, okay? But it sucks still." he mumbled and Lizzie walked towards him.

"I know Enzo, believe me when I arrived in F1 I had to go through the same… but just because they have this opinion of you, doesn’t mean that they’re right, okay? Do the talking on track. That’s what I did. And your dad as well… just don’t give a fuck about them."

"Hey!" I pinched her side and she laughed "No curse words!"

"Whatever." she rolled her eyes.

"What I’m saying is, you made it this far because of your talent. You’re a damn good driver and it’s time that you finally see that yourself, don’t give a fuck about others, and just focus on yourself. Your race. Your team. You. Don’t listen to anything else." Lizzie nudges his shoulder and I nodded.

"Your mum is right. Always when I had a shitty season and I was too much in my head everything got worse, but the moment I stopped caring about others and started focusing on myself, it was always like the penny dropped and I was able to turn the season around."

"You know how uncle Danny always said fuck 'em all? Well… that’s the kind of attitude you need now… but please stay within the rules…" Lizzie chuckled and Enzo nodded.

"Alright… you’re right. I have to focus on myself." he said and hugged Lizzie, then me "I’m sorry dad, but Marco and Lucas won’t win this weekend. It’s my turn…" he winked once and then walked off.

"Well, I guess you have to talk to your drivers…" Lizzie said and I cocked an eyebrow "They have to watch out for Enzo. If he’s like you? He’s a menace and will force them into making mistakes that he will use to overtake…"

"That was more your field of expertise…"

"Congrats Zo! Damn what a race! Emmie and I woke up the entire hotel." Elio said and Emmie next to him nodded.

"You really kicked some asses today. I’m proud little bro. Seriously. The face of Vasquez and Benton? Priceless. I swear. I can’t wait to talk about it in my next podcast. You should be one of my guests!" Emmie said excitedly and Enzo smiled from ear to ear.

"If I can say whatever I want to? Yes. No PR trained answers. Just what I have to say…"

"Enzo…" Lizzie mumbled and I laughed.

"Maybe tone it down a little, you still have to race for a while with these guys…" I said and Enzo shrugged his shoulders a little.

"How’s New York? The campus? Tell me everything!" he asked and Elio and Emmie began to describe every single detail of their trip.

I looked at Lizzie, how she smiled at our kids, squeezed into Enzo’s side so she could see Emmie and Elio on the screen. She looked up and tilted her head a little and I nodded towards the door and got off the sofa, Lizzie following me.

"What’s up?" she asked and I grabbed her by the waist, kissing her "As much as I like that, something is going on in here…" she tapped at my forehead with her fingers and I smiled.

"Marco will retire at the end of this season…" I began and her eyes widened "John wants Enzo, but only if he proves himself… today was… today was amazing, but he needs more weekends like this."

"And you doubt that he will have them?"

"No! God, cara mia!" I said immediately, shaking my head "I just don’t want to put him under too much pressure. You know? But I also want him to race every weekend like today. If he continues like this? He’ll be driving for us next season."

"You won’t tell him, right?" Lizzie asked and I shook my head.

"I wasn’t even allowed to tell you… but we have no secrets so…"

"Don’t worry, I won’t tell him. He will do just fine, you’ll see. He doesn’t need our help. Not anymore. And if so, he knows he can always come to us…"

"You’re right. He’ll manage." I kissed her cheek and looked at the sofa, where Enzo was telling Elio and Emmie everything about his final overtake of Marco.

He would make it. He would prove that he deserves a seat at Ferrari. He would do just great.

Summer 2048:

"Here, cara mia." Charles handed me a glass of wine and sat down next to me "What are you thinking about?"

"Oh nothing…" I said quietly, but he pinched my side.

"We’re married for almost 23 years, together for more than 25 years, I know you for over 40 years… I know when something is going on in there… so spill the beans…" he pulled me into him, kissing my temple.

"It’s just… Charles we’re 50… our kids are successful young adults. Emmie’s podcast is in the top 10 of the most influential Formula 1 podcasts, one of Elio’s photographs was used in the newest National Geographic magazine and Enzo just won his first race in Formula 1… isn’t it crazy?" I said and Charles was quiet for a while, before he chuckled "What?"

"It’s crazy… you’re right. But it’s wonderfully crazy, don’t you think? Our kids are truly amazing, they go their own way, are their own people, but never forget where they’re coming from…" he said and I nodded.

"Who would’ve thought that this would be our life one day…"

"Me. From the moment I realised that I was in love with you. This was what I was hoping for. You and me. 3 kids. A wonderful house you made into our home. That was the life I was dreaming of…" he whispered and I turned a little, looking at him "I told you before that from the moment I met you, you were intertwined in my brain, my thoughts, my mind, every fibre of my body. You were it for me. I know I took a stupid detour, but at the end of the day it was just that, a detour, just a stupid bump in the road to my destiny. You."

"I always loved how you were able to say things like that out of nowhere…" I smiled at him and he chuckled.

"You’re the biggest inspiration there is." he cupped my cheeks and kissed me, time stopped and for a moment it felt like our very first kiss all those years ago in Miami, after I crashed out, after Charles confessed his feelings for me. I opened my eyes and looked at him. The little freckles on his skin, the gold speckles in his eyes. The boyish smile with his gorgeous dimples. For a moment it all came back and I saw the young boy I fell in love with all those years ago before my eyes.

"I love you, Charles Leclerc."

"I love you, Lizzie Doetterer-Leclerc."

"It’s you and me. Against the world…"

"…always."

The End ♥️

And that’s it. Again, thank you all for reading. It’s been one hell of a ride. ♥️

(Also, congrats Charles on WINNING Monza!!!)

Please leave a comment/ like/ reblog/ message and tell me how you liked it! I'm dying to hear your thoughts!

Last but not least, English is not my first language and although I tried my best: please excuse any mistakes I made!

Taglist:

@itsjustkhaos @eugene-emt-roe @sunny44 @silkenthusiasts @glitterquadricorn @aundercover @kakorrhaphiphobia @alittlebitofbooksandmagic @ru-kru @shimmermotorsport @janeh22 @kahhorri @18754389 @chiliwhore @hellowgoodbye @queensassybitchsworld @harrysdimple05 @skynel09 @fangirlforever2000

[kale-theteaqueen]

To Pay a Debt, Chapter 47

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This is crazy to write, guys.

224,000 words later and here we are!

The love on this fic is absolutely insane, and I cannot thank you all enough for the support, love, and undying dedication to coming with me on this journey. We still have an epilogue, and a plethora of bonus chapters, but the main story is finished, and I hope I did everyone justice for you.

Nesta means everything to me, and bringing her justice fills me with a deep sense of satisfaction, something I hope you felt while reading this.

I love you all very much, and hope to see you along the way as I write more works!

So much love and gratitude!!

- TTQ

---

Tag List: @c-e-d-dreamer @podemechamardek @talkfantasytome @moodymelanist @whyisaravenlike-awritingdesk @doriansgf @eerievixen @sweet-pea1 @thewayshedreamed @agents-assemble @jsmelodies @aelinchocolatelover @unlikelypersonalknight1 @slipknotvol3 @stylishmuser @lady-winter-sunrise @bri-loves-sunflowers @misswonderflower @acourtofladydeath

[tillthelandslide]

Insufferable Arsehole - Part 6: Inside Your Mind

A/n: Hi everyone :) just want to say thank you to everyone has read this series so far, the support means so much to me and its mad to think some of my fave writers on here think this series is good! crazy to me but thank you thank you thank you!

Hope you like this chapter :)

warnings: smut, mentions of drug abuse, addiction and rehab

over 5k words

Series Masterlist

Part 5

Their lips were on each other's again the moment they were in the hotel room, the drive to this particular hotel had been torture. She had been teasing him from the moment they got in the car, allowing her thighs to spread, dangerously close to flashing all of the boys in the back of the car. The usual tour bus wasn't needed for this seemingly short journey (one which felt far too long with how badly he wanted her)

Her lip was being abused by her teeth and he could see her nipples pressed against the "I hate Matty Healy" shirt she was wearing.

The boys kept teasing him too, commenting on the fact he seemed distracted by something. He was very much distracted: by the tanned flesh of her thighs, by the visible bruises scattered across her neck (of which he just needed to attach his mouth and maybe teeth too, darkening them further), by the fact that her underwear was stuffed into his back pocket, by her lips which were just begging to be kissed and sucked; by everything that was her.

But now they didn't have to hold back, they could simply show one another how badly they wanted each other.

"We should probably have those drinks with the boys like we said" she said as his lips drifted along her neck, down to her chest, pressing against her collar bones. The t-shirt she had been wearing had been thrown across the room as soon as they entered the threshold, as were his trousers, shirt and her skirt. She knew she didn't really mean her words but wanted to see what he said.

"They can wait, let me have you to myself for a bit" he says, lips not moving from her chest. He pulls against her bra, revealing the swell of her right breast.

"Fuck how are you so perfect. God I don't deserve you" he says, lips wrapping around her nipple, her hands fly to his hair as her head snaps back and she moans loudly.

"Can't believe I haven't seen all of you yet. Doesn't seem fair does it love?" He asks and she doesn't even know what he's saying, not really, but she's nodding against him. Now she thinks about it, whenever they've done stuff before, either one of them had been partly clothed, the thought of being completely bare in front of him has her feeling a bit nervous.

As if he could read her mind, his lips stop their ministrations as he looks her deeply in the eyes.

"You're so beautiful love. Unbelievably so. I'm the luckiest, you know that right?" He asks as he takes her hands in his, pressing kisses along each of her knuckles, it was sweet, a clear change from how they were acting earlier.

"And we don't have to do anything okay? Not if you don't want to. I'm just happy to have you here with me. But if you want to go join the guys that's fine" he explains as she pulls him into her for a soft kiss. She was growing to like this side of him, a side she was just learning about, one in which they had barely scratched the surface of.

"I want to, I want you" she says against his mouth, he doesn't speed up his movements, he simply holds her against him, his grasp firm but not harsh. His lips move softly against hers, tongue making languid movements against her own.

He slowly moves them to the bed, hands supporting her back as she fell against it with a soft thump. She knows now this was going to be different from before. And she felt anxious at the thought but was also excited to see a different side to Matty .

"Matty" she says, her voice hesitant.

"Tell me what's on your mind" he says softly, lips wandering to her neck where more soft kisses were placed. Her own hands ran down his bare back, over the muscles, sketching him out like a map, trying to memorise every curve, every bump and vein.

"I'm scared" she admits, her voice quiet. She didn't struggle to be sincere quite as much as Matty, but she always worried that her words (no matter how sincere) would be rejected, or laughed at, or worse denied.

"What are you scared of my love?" He asked. Her heart fluttered at the words "my" and she pulled him away from her neck to look at him. She didn't know whether to tell him the truth: tell him she was scared of all the feelings she was feeling, how quickly she was falling for him, how he didn't even have to say he was sorry anymore because she forgave him the minute he told her his true feelings. She didn't speak and he simply pressed another gentle kiss to her lips, trying to draw the words out of her.

"Nevermind, I'm being silly" she says and his eyebrows furrow.

"Don't do that love, don't push me away. Wish I could be in your mind right now, hear what you hear, all your thoughts and feelings" he says, lips pressing against her cheek.

"That's what scares me" she whispers, fingertips drifting along his skin, not managing to find his eyes, afraid she'll spill every single thought that was bouncing around her mind.

"What love?" His fingers find her chin, slowly lifting it so they're looking at each other again.

"Think you already know all that.... You seem to know what I'm thinking without me telling you" she says and he nods, because he felt like it was true.

"Truth is love. I hardly know you, not in the way I want to. Want to know everything there is to know, all your secrets, all the things you've never told anyone before.... Not G, not Ross... No one" he admits and her heart swells at the idea.

"I'd like that" she smiles up at him and he places another kiss on her lips.

The moment where they so desperately wanted each other seems to have passed, now replaced by one which was more special. One where they wanted to talk, about everything, and so they did, some things he already knew, things he had memorised during the time in which they 'hated each other'.

Like her coffee order, her favourite colour, her favourite flowers, her birthday, all sorts. She was surprised he remembered half of it, but the fact he had made her realise how much he truly did like her.

Matty told her everything she wanted to know too, like his favourite books, his favourite songs, stories about his childhood that she didn't get to witness. Some things he struggled to say but wanted to, like his experience with drugs and addiction.

"What's your favorite song?" He asked, something he was uncertain whether he knew.

"Hmm... Good question, what genre?" She asks making him laugh.

"Probably... Something by Fleetwood Mac. Hard to pick which, maybe Storms, Silver Springs, or Landslide" she explains and he smiles down at her. He notes in his head that they're pretty sad songs, songs about unrequited love. He wonders if that's the only love she knows, a question for another day he thinks.

"Wanna know my favourite song of yours?" She asks, hands pressing against his chest to properly look at him.

His nodding down at her, fingertips drifting along her back, the skin was warm under his touch. She had never spoken about their music to him and he was excited to know what she thought, having spent years writing songs and wanting nothing more than to pick her mind about them.

"Inside Your Mind" she asks and he smiles, a hidden meaning behind his smile.

"Oh yeah? Why's that?" He asks, he couldn't wait to tell her the true meaning of the song.

"Think it's a beautiful song... Remember the day G showed it to me... Couldn't believe how beautiful it was... Remember thinking I wish someone wrote such beautiful things about me" she admits and his smile stretches wider.

"What?" She asks, wondering why he's smiling at her the way he is.

"I wrote it about you" he admits. Her breath catches and she pauses, eyes drifting over his features to see if he was taking the piss.

"What do you mean you wrote it about me?" She asks, shoving him slightly, testing whether he was being earnest.

"I wrote it about you... Remember the summer before the album was released? We spent most of the summer together... Well you with the boys more than me" he says and her mind flicks back to the memory.

George had begged her to go on holiday with them, it was one of the only times their busy schedules lined up. She remembers agreeing despite knowing Matty was going to be there. She was having a difficult time with a relationship and she wanted nothing more than to be with her best friends.

"We seemed to avoid each other the whole holiday though" she says and he smiles at the memory.

"You avoided me... I was watching your every move love. I remember it was one of the first times I really got to see you... Without all the arguing because we hardly spoke..." He admits, she allows him to just speak, not interrupting him.

"There was this one night... Don't know if you'd remember, you were quite drunk... To be fair I was high as a kite too... I remember all of it though" he laughs at the memory. She listens intently wanting to know what he's about to say.

"We were all sitting out on the patio of that house, remember the huge pool? You had your feet in the water and I remember wanting nothing more than to just go up to you and just talk, without all the arguing" she nods at this, she thinks she would've liked that.

"Anyway... You came and sat with us and we were drinking and we were all talking, it was the first time we actually properly spoke without being mean to each other. Remember you like... Squeezed in-between George and me and I was shocked I had you that close" she remembers it now and she can't help but smile at the huge smile that rests on his lips as he tells the story.

"think I remember you were particularly bearable that day so I was nice to you... Also I was high too" she smirks and he chuckles at her, pressing a kiss to her head.

"We all drank way too much and Hann forced G and Ross to go to bed, you didn't want to so you stayed" he says, she doesn't remember any of this and she feels bad.

"I thought you were going to leave because it was just us... But we spoke for quite a while" he says.

"About what?" She asks, genuinely curious as to what they would've spoken about back then.

"About all sorts: your tour, our tour, you told me about this coffee place you had found in New York, told me to visit it, you told me about some douche you were seeing at the time" she groans at the last part making him chuckle

"... And then you fell asleep on me... And I didn't wake you up because I just wanted to have you there forever" he admits and her eyes soften as she looks into them.

"I eventually took you up to your room and then wrote that song... That whole holiday I was trying to memorise everything about you, just in case I never got to see it again" he admits.

"It was the November after that holiday you-?" She goes to ask, stopping her words completely worried she was pressing on something he didn't want to talk about.

He knows what she's saying even though she doesn't say it and he nods, grasping her hand, placing a gentle kiss to the back of it, letting her know it was okay to talk about.

"Can I admit something to you? Without you... Despising me for it.." he asks and she nods.

"That summer... It made me realise how much I had fucked up... I knew I could've had you the way that the guys had you, if I was honest with you from the start... The idea of never having you kind of broke me" he admits, she frowns and she feels her heart hurt at his words.

"I always hoped that one day it would all fall into place. But you went on tour after that and I dunno... I missed you even though... Even though I didn't have you. And I kind of just... Broke" he admits, she frowns up at him. She felt like it was her fault and he's quickly pressing a firm kiss to her lips as he sees her features fall.

"Baby you had nothing to do with it. It was me... Me being stupid and selfish and getting myself into this fucking pit of misery... There was other stuff too, don't want you thinking it was all about you because it wasn't. I got to this point in my life where... I didn't like the person I saw in the mirror, the douche that had fucked up his life... And using, it just made all that go away" he says and she nods, still feeling awful for his confession. She appreciates him being honest and that overshadows his confession.

"In rehab... I kind of realised that I can either pine over you for the rest of my life... Or I can do something about it. Kind of had that realisation about a lot of things in my life. I just knew I had to fix my life and myself otherwise I risked losing all of you"

"Matty" she says softly, leaning forward to press her lips to his. Her eyes were tearing up now, and he felt a tear drop to his cheek making him pull away.

"Why are you crying love?" He asks, pulling her tightly into her chest. She knew now she didn't need to be scared about anything, he was her person. He always had been.

"I just know now. I know how you feel about me. You don't need to prove anything Matty... That- that song, that story, it's everything I need to know" she says, pushing herself away from his embrace to look at him.

"Would you be mad if I said I wanted to prove it?" He says making her laugh.

"Of course not" she says, pulling him into a hug now. In fact she loves that he still does, he could easily settle now, accept the fact that she had forgiven him but he still wanted to prove how much he cared and that was the sweetest thing.

"Thank you" she murmurs against his neck.

"Thank you for what sweetheart?" He says.

"For telling me all that" she says, she knows it isn't easy for him to be like this with people and she's so thankful she is the one he's choosing to be like this with.

"One sec" he says, going to his bag to get something, whatever is, is being clutched in a tight grip in his hand and he hesitates as he puts it into hers, clasping his hands around hers, not letting her see it yet.

"I bought you something on that holiday... I knew... Well no: I hoped, that one day I'd be giving it to you, and have carried it everywhere with me since then... Just in case I needed it" he says, removing his hand, allowing her to open her hands, revealing a gold necklace, attached to the chain was a pendant, a small letter "M".

"Matty..." she says, voice trailing off as she looked at the piece of jewelery. "It's beautiful"

"You don't have to wear it... Not yet. Not if you don't want to" he says and her eyes find his.

"just promise me something yeah?" He says.

"Anything" she nods.

"Promise me you'll wear that when you're mine. When I've proven to you how sorry I am, how I truly feel" he says and she thinks he's already proven all of that, not that she lets him know that just yet.

"I promise" she says, pulling him into another tight hug.

"Let's go join the boys yeah?" He asks and she nods, not before pressing a firm kiss to his lips. He watches her as he leaves the bed, begging her to stay there for a second whilst he grabs his phone, snapping a quick photo of her, she looked so cool, clad only in her underwear, tattoos on display, tanned skin almost tempting him again.

"You're so beautiful love, could look at you all day" he says, palms flat against the bed as he lowers his mouth to hers quickly before they finally dress and join the boys.

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Two weeks later the band are all sitting around this huge room at one of the venues. The past two weeks have been absolute bliss, it somehow felt that they had all grown closer, they all spent every waking movement with each other, never tiring of each other. You'd think spending 5 weeks with each other, 35 whole days, would make them sick of each other, but she loved the time she spent with every single one of them.

Matty and Lou had almost been in their own little love bubble, every day Matty did something to prove how sorry he was for treating her so badly for so many years. He made her a coffee every morning, sung songs to her when they were alone, scattered loving kisses to every inch of her body he could find. Sometimes in the middle of the night when they should've been sleeping, he would tell her a story, a small fact about the old days, that just proved that he really didn't hate her after all.

The band were now scattered about the room on various sofas. Matty sits on a round leather chair, it almost swallows him, makes him look tiny in comparison.

Ross is sprawled out on the ground next to him, his legs extending in front of him as one arm rests under his head. Matty laughs at how ridiculous he looks, his head resting near Matty's calves as the two spoke, Ross's voice slightly distorted from lying upside down.

The sound catches the attention of Lou, they share a look briefly before she continues talking to George , the two laughing with each other, G's arms wrapped tightly around her shoulders, the two spending some much needed time with each other (especially considering Charli had left to do her own shows) but the sight made Matty's heart swell.

"I've never seen you so happy mate" Ross says from below him, making Matty turn his attention to the lanky lad laid beneath him. The tall man turns on his stomach, looking up at him the right way round now.

"It's good mate" he then says. Matty nods, his eye wandering over to her again. He almost draws her in his mind: laughing uncontrollably with his best mate, tears coating her cheeks, a huge smile resting against her lips, those lips that he can never get enough of. Her hair is up in a ponytail, carelessly showing the bruises scattered around her neck.

"She's just the best" Matty says and Ross nods.

"She is. Thanks for that, glad you plucked your ideas up, glad we didn't lose her in the end " Ross says and Matty smiles at him "one of us forever now".

Matty nods "yeah" he has half a mind to ask her to get the 1975 box tattooed, she was part of the band after all, but she was also so much more than that.

A little while later, Ross has moved from the floor, now mucking around with Hann and George.

Matty remains in the huge chair, too comfortable to move. His phone rests in his hand, scrolling carelessly through Instagram, coming across a photo Lou had posted, the one he took, he smiles before commenting, reading his mates comments too, smiling down at his phone.

His phone pings, notifying him of a text. He smiles when he clicks on it, a selfie of the two of them set as her picture, "Room for one more?".

His eyes leave the screen, when he sees her, her own phone resting in her hands as she leans against a wall on the other side of the room. He nods and she walks over. He holds his arms out as she climbs onto the chair, he adjusts her so her legs are hung over his, holding onto her side as she rests against him. She smells faintly of cigarettes and he thinks that must have been where she was previously, but its her scent that is so overwhelming her; sweet and addictive that evades his senses.

"Hi" he says quietly, a wide smile breaking out on his face.

"Hi" she smiles.

"Missed you" he says simply, she nuzzles into his side, not saying anything for a beat, her lips press against his cheek, feeling the rough stubble he had let grow against her mouth.

"Missed you too" she pulls back to look at him, his red lips call her name and she can't help but push hers against his. His hand flies to her jaw, controlling the kiss quickly. His mouth opens on instinct and her tongue quickly meets his, moving against each other passionately. She pulls away slowly, making him groan in protest against her, only making her giggle. Oh that laugh, he fucking loves it man. He loves her.

"What was that for?" He asks, not complaining in the slightest, just curious.

"You guys are adorable" George says sighing deeply. They break away to look at him. A frown on his face.

"Fuck I miss charli' he says and they both frown.

They share a look, nod and both open their arms up, inviting him to join on the huge chair. He practically throws himself onto the pair, the both of them wrapping him up in a warm hug.

----------------------------------------------------------

They were both acting absolutely feral before the show, they were annoying the shit out of everyone with the amount of sexual tension that was in the room.

The moment he walked out in his suit she felt her eyes darken, her breath pick up and her heart beat faster in her chest (and core). Her eyes raked down his form, how the shirt clung to his chest in just the right way, how his slacks fit his slender legs perfectly. He looked godly and she found herself swallowing at the sight.

He knew that look all too well and he smirked at the sight. She looked fit too: black leather skirt clinging to her delicious thighs as she sat on a high chair, her booted legs swinging, the top she was wearing wasn't particularly low cut but he could see the "M" necklace he bought her resting in between the swell of her breasts.

"Fuck" he muttered to himself, it didn't take her long to wear the necklace at all and the thought had him falling deeper by the minute.

He felt a hand clasp his back making him have to peel his eyes of her.

"Mate, we've got 5 minutes before we have to be on that stage, I know she looks fit but don't start something you know both of you can't finish" Ross says and George nods next to him. He sighs but nods agreeing with the sound advise.

His legs take him to her anyway. The boys flee just in case, getting ready to go on stage and leaving the pair be.

"Wow Healy" she says and a groan grumbles in his chest at the sultry tone she uses.

"Right?" He says, giving her a twirl, trying to ease the tension for his sake only. His eyes find hers again and he almost loses it.

He runs a hand through his curls which aren't tamed by the usual hair gel tonight and she almost pounces on him. His feet betray him and take him the rest of the way to her. His eyes land on her delicious thighs, hands finding them without a single thought. They're spread not a second later and oh how well they welcome him. His eyes catch a glimpse of her black lace underwear and his eyes snap shut.

"You're killing me here" he says as her neck strains to find his Adams apple.

"Baby" he groans eyes snapping open, their dark eyes finding each other.

"You look so good" he says, the vowels drawn out.

"You don't look so bad yourself Healy" she says, fingers playing with his curls, he didn't even see how they got there but they're curling around the strands gently, she knows she can't mess up his hair too much.

He breathes in deeply as he looks at her, breath bated and sharp.

"You look so good baby" she sighs out, repeating his words back to him, her breath hitting his lips.

"Oh fuck it" he says, smashing his lips against hers. Their tongues quickly find each other, meeting messily. He presses his core forward, his hands finding her hips and pulling her tight against him, she almost falls off the chair, but his tight grasp has her held against him, flushed.

Their make out session is quickly cut short, bells ringing to let the band know they're due to be on soon.

"Fuck" he murmurs against her lips, he sighs against her before they both pull away to go on stage.

He had clearly decided to make this show more painful for her. Particularly when he did the 'bit' on the sofa. It felt all to real when his fingers grasped the buttons of his shirt. Usually he would look up, away from the audience but this time he turned to where she was standing on the stage.

His eyes found hers, he took a puff of his cigarette, lips pursing as he blew out, he winked at her making her gasp. His hand smoothed down his chest, he only looked away when his palm lay flat against his trouser covered cock, that's when he decided to throw his head back, he purposely let out a deep sigh.

She swore she heard her name and the fans in front of her looked to her and screamed. Oh shit he said her name.

"You little shit Healy" she murmured to herself.

During the final bows, she made her way backstage and waited for him there. She sat anxiously for a while before she left, deciding to wait in his changing room. When she heard the crowd screaming loudly she knew they had left the stage.

She knew he'd rush to find her so she had to be quick. Her fingers found the zip of her skirt, discarding it. She took off her top, revealing a black lace bodysuit, something Matty hadn't seen her in before. She found one of Matty's white shirts and threw that over her frame. She heard the door slam against the wall behind her and she whipped around to seem him. His shirt was nowhere to be seen and he had already started on the buckle of his belt. He shut the door behind him and turned the lock until it clicked.

"There she is" he said, his voice deep as his eyes found hers.

"That wasn't fair now was it Matty?" She says, stepping slowly towards him. He froze in his tracks as she approached him, finally taking in her attire. A groan rumbled from his chest and his cock twitched in his pants.

"Fuck me you look hot' he says as her hands are placed on his bare shoulders. She lowers herself until she's on her knees, her lips finding his abdomen as he throws his head back.

"Don't get me wrong, you looked so fit. Running your hand down your chest like that" she said, mimicking his earlier actions.

"And the way your head was thrown back when you..." She says, her hand moving down more until flush against his core.

"But it wasn't fair Matty. Saying my name as if no one would hear" she says.

"Lou" he sighs again. She looks up at him through her eyelashes, her fingers find the zipper of his trousers and they make light work of undoing them. He helps her remove them, he knows she's the devil when her lips press against his clothed core.

"Fuck me" he says. Looking down at the beautiful woman on her knees for him, trying to commit the view to memory.

"oh I will, don't you worry baby" she says and he groans. Her hands find the hem of his boxers, pulling at them until his member is free and snaps against his abs.

This is completely uncharted territory but he's thriving off it.

"You're so hard for me" she says and he nods bashfully. She's too turned on and needs him too much to tease him, so her lips quickly find their place around his tip. The red and leaking tip disappearing against her red lips, her lipstick marking his member.

He groans and his hands wrap around her hair, making a makeshift ponytail .

"oh fuck you're good at this ' he groans. Her lips move down his shaft, all the way to the base and she moans against him, the vibrations nearly killing him. She begins bobbing up and down on him, the head of his cock hitting the back of her throat perfectly. She doesn't gag, she moans and it has Matty's stomach clenching.

"Oh fuck you're the best" he says and she looks up at him, continuing her work and making him writhe against her. All that can be heard is his deep grunts and the wet sounds coming from below him and it's like music to his ears.

"Baby I can't, I need to be inside you" he groans, she moans against him and his hands are quickly placed against her shoulders, pushing her off him until a pop sounds. His hand finds her and he pulls her to her feet, he grabs her hips and pulls her flush against him, he quickly picks her up, leading her to the countertop to the left of them. He pops open the lace bodysuit, she grasps him in her hand and leads him to her core. His tip brushes against her clit before dipping into her cunt, coating just the head of him with her juices. He gives her a look and she nods at him, letting him know she wanted this.

"Fuck you're so wet, who made you this wet huh?" He says, lips pushing against hers, tongues fighting.

"You, it's always you" she says against him.

"Please fuck me Matty" she sighs.

"oh I will' he says, a smirk resting against his lips before he thrusts harshly into her. She takes all of him and they both moan loudly.

"Oh god Matty' she moans, hands grasping at his back, trying to get him closer although not possible.

"You were made for me darling' he looks down at where they meet, nearly coming undone at the site.

He pulls back before his hips snap forward again, sending his cock deep into her. Her head snaps upwards as she screams. They moan, groan and scream in unison, his cock driving to and from her at an unforgiving pace, curving upwards slightly and hitting her gspot perfectly. His eyes are trained on where they met, the sight filthy, turning him on even more. He felt unbelievably lucky that he got to have her like this. He had never felt this good with anyone before, but he also couldn't believe how connected it made them feel.

Her mouth opens and forms a "o" as the tip of him rubs against her soft spot.

"That it baby?" He groans and she nods vigorously. He continues driving himself into that spot, the spot that has her convulsing around him. His own head shoots back now, her lips sucking against his Adams apple. His fingertips find her clit and he circles it.

"Cum with me" he says, his words sending her over the edge, he cums not a second later joining her in the white hot pleasure.

It was a hard and fast fuck, what both of them needed to shake off the tension that had started to become unbearable mixed with adrenaline of the show.

He holds her tightly against him, pressing soft kisses to her lips. He pulls back to look at her and finds her smiling up at him.

"Never going to get used to that" he says and she nods in agreement. His pulls out of her, making the both of them groan. His fingertips find the "M" of the necklace as he smiles down at her. He doesn't ask if this means she's his, because the both of them already knew that and neither of them needed or wanted to confirm it just yet. They were enjoying just figuring it out for now.

"Look pretty with my initial on you" he says and she smirks.

"Marked your territory real good" she says and he all but groans at that. His territory. Her words had basically confirmed she was his anyway.

"Spoke to the boys earlier.... We think... If you want. That you should get the box tattoo" he says and she smiles up at him. If anyone asked her about this moment, she knew she wouldn't be able to do it justice, or explain how it made her feel. It was the best thing that had ever happened to her, it let her know that she was where she was supposed to be with the people who loved her most: she was home.

"I think that's a wonderful idea" she says, fighting back the urge to cry at the sentiment.

"Now what are we going to do about the fact you moaned my name in front of thousands of people?" She asks and he laughs loudly, leaving her to get a cloth to clean her up. He's gentle with the process knowing she would be easily overstimulated. She appreciates the softness of it all, especially when he places a soft kiss on her forehead when she winces.

"That's up to you love. We can let them speculate, or we can tell them" he says and she nods, thinking through the possible options.

"Tell them what though?" She asks and he agrees, at this moment in time, nothing was confirmed, they both knew how they felt but nothing was set in stone yet, they were going with the flow.

"I don't know... But I do know I don't want to have to hide. Want to love on you whenever I want... Flirt with you on that stage and over Instagram" he says making her laugh.

"How post-modern of you" and they both laugh loudly at that.

"Well then... Guess we just let them speculate" she says and he nods at her. His lips press against hers before they both get changed, returning to the boys.

"You guys are gross" George says making everyone laugh.

"Oh shut up, we've heard much worse from you" Matty says.

"Oh Charli... Just like that" Ross says, in a high pitch voice, completely taking the piss out of G. She's thankful he's taking some of the heat off of Matty and her.

"I do not sound like that thank you very much!" He says, defensive as ever. They join the group, Lou talking with Hann about various things as Matty messes around with the other lads.

She couldn't see how this could get any better.

Part 7

[askfallenroyalty]

my thoughts on finishing AFR (tumblr version)

Firstly, thank you all so, so so much for reading.

5 years ago, on February 19th, 2018, 2:24 PM I posted the first AFR comic. I drew it thinking it'd be a nice little project for a few months, and then I'd move on. Little did I know it'd become a huge passion project and something that's brought me many, many tears and laughter. It's been a journey making this thing, I can easily say I am hardly the person I am when I first made this. I've learned so much about myself, the world, and what I wanted to say in comics.

AFR didn't become a serious project until I realized Asriel and Chara's story hit home to me and I realized I had something more profound to say than just "heehee silly ut comic where siblings squabble." Now it's become a story about growing up, and the life after the "happy ever after." What does it mean for "everybody to live?" well, you live. You suffer. You cry and laugh and it's everything you want and you fear. You wake up another day.

It's no secret that Chara and Asriel are heavily based on myself. Every OC and every character I can put my grubby little hands on have been influenced by me. Yun's excitement for monsters, Mew Mew's loud declarations of frenzied thought, Hol's quiet, head-in-the-clouds nature... the list goes on. Knowing the characters now, I'm excited for the redraw as I can paint their stories from start-to-finish properly. It pains me more than anything I can't just say "here's a finished product, fully and forever." But one step to getting there was finally finishing the tumblr version. So even if I were to die, or lose my ability to draw, I can say: I told my story. I made it real. It's messy, incomplete, and not at all what I aspire it to be, but it's here. And that means, so, so much to me.

Never again will I be accepting story asks. Never again will we see what crazy thing Asriel and Chara are up to in their journey into adulthood. While the story will continue to develop, it has it's ending.

I've grown, a lot. I started this when I was 21 years old. I've had a on/off relationship, I've learned I'm neurodivergent, I've moved out of my abusive dad's home. I've had so many jobs in that time. I lived through the pandemic (not that it's over) and I've made and lost (out of touch) friends along the way. I am Sam. I drew AFR. I still have so much left to do to make it fully realized but I did it.

And in that time people have offered me grammar and spelling corrections. Advice, suggestions, fanart. You've sent like, I can only imagine to be at least a thousand asks in this amount of time. You guys have been a huge part in this comic being made. Even as the story moves more and more away from the "Ask" part of the title, you guys made it so much more fun, thought provoking, and exciting.

So while my minds a bit scattered and I'm kinda jumbled up, I just want to say with every bit of myself: THANK YOU!!!!!

I understand if many of you don't choose to stick around for the redraw, I'm more than thankful to anyone who's read this far (or heck, just one tumblr post is enough. I feel seen.) and if you so choose to stay, I look forward to sharing a million more little moments with you. ^_^

Thank you and I wish you the very best, have a good life. Peace and love on the planet earth <3

[wwillywonka]

and just like that, the final chapter of heaven on their minds is done! thanks to all my readers for being with me on this crazy journey! i first started writing this so many years ago, when i was just a little pre-teen, so it finally being done feels truly insane. thanks especially to @n0isy-gh0st for beta-reading, to @ohbutwheresyourheart and @fandomjunkyard​ for being my other wonderful wonka moots, and to @tea-earl-grey​ and @dragons-dice​ for being my two biggest supporters and bestest friends. <33

Chapters: 12/12 Fandom: Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - All Media Types, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (2005), Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory (1971), Charlie Series - Roald Dahl, Wonka (2023)Rating: Mature Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage Relationships: Charlie Bucket & Willy Wonka, Arthur Slugworth/Willy Wonka, Willy Wonka/Original Male Character(s), i don’t ship willy/arthur but wonka’s backstory cannot exist without arthur taking advantage of him, Mr. Wilkinson/Willy Wonka, Noodle & Willy Wonka, NOT charlie x wonka, very much not a ship fic Characters: Willy Wonka, Charlie Bucket, Arthur Slugworth, Original Male Character(s), Mrs. Bucket, Mr. Bucket, Felix Ficklegruber, Gerald Prodnose, Mr. Fickelgruber (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory), Mr. Prodnose (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory), Mr. Wilkinson (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory), Noodle (Wonka Movie 2023), Wilbur Wonka, Willy Wonka's Mother, God Additional Tags: willy is transmasc, Religious Metaphors, Lonely God, Character Study, Depression, Suicidal Ideation, canon child abuse, Eating Disorders, Rape/Non-con - Freeform, dead dove do not eat, the kindest people are the ones who have been through the worst horrors, hope it’s clear that i do not endorse any of these i just want to put willy through hell, hypocritical character, Unreliable Narrator, Jesus Christ Superstar - Freeform, Jesus/Judas type relationships, Toxic Co-Dependency Summary:

Willy Wonka is the most famous man in the world. There has never been anyone like him and there never will be again. But how did he get here? How did he earn his reputation? Who along the way hurt him so fiercely that he went mad? If you strip away the myth from the man, you will see...

Or: A dark, tragic take on Charlie and the Chocolate Factory because the prequel didn't do anything right. Mostly a deep dive into Willy and Charlie's friendship.

Or: CATCF 2005 was so fucking unhinged to look at a beloved children’s book/classic film character and go “oh yeah, let’s give this guy childhood trauma and PTSD flashbacks thus making him think he’s unlovable then make him go into a fifteen-year-long isolation to prevent suffering from further pain then introduce him to a 10 year old who treats him like the Christian god and make that child his best friend and sole reason for living then give him the loving family he deserves because even the most fucked up people deserve to be loved. Yeah, let’s show this to children. Oh, and don’t forget to make him a bitchy twink.” <3

Inspired by Jesus Christ Superstar.

[hazbinhazbinhazbinreblog]

Crack Fic (idk if the first one went through)

———

Velvette's chatting with Niffty on a call about one of the cyclop's works.

The work in question is, allegedly, a "tasteful erotica focusing on the journey of two demons' sexual desires" which is just their code for 'Niffty wrote a 200 chapter Bible of Vox and Alastor getting it on lets fucking GO'.

Anyways. She's beta-ing for her best girlfriend because social media is her domain and RPF smut absolutely counts as social media. Velvette is flipping through one of the chapters and marking down and errors and making comments to Niffty while doing so.

She tosses the empty pen behind her and plucks a new one from her pocket as she passes through a doorway.

"In chapter nine I think you should give Al and Vox some type of incentive to keep going at it. I mean, I enjoy reading about two guys fucking as much as the next person, but seriously these two have been fucking for eight chapters straight using just spit as lube and your boss' shadow…tentacles…"

Velvette trails off as she glances up and realizes she's walked into an Overlord meeting, which should be impossible considering she's at home and because there's another Velvette seated at the table in front of her along with a copy of Vox.

Velvette looks behind her through the doorway. She's not at her house.

She looks forward again.

Everybody's still staring at her.

Niffty is still on the phone, repeatedly asking about what caused her to stop talking.

Velvette chuckles nervously and gestures for the Overlords to hold on for one minute. "Ahahaha…uh, Niffty? Do you think you could get Alastor to come pick me up? I think I'm lost. Yes, this is some magical bullshit. What? No, I'm not in a world where everybody's having an orgy. Yes—no—look, just ask Al to come get me. I don't care if those two are on a date I just need to get home. I don't have his magical fuckery or whatever. Yeah, m'kay. Thanks. Love ya hun. Buh-bye."

Velvette presses the end call button and gives everyone a nod. "Sorry for barging in and shit. I'll leave you all to it."

Velvette turns and sprints off, not willing to entertain whatever bullshit this is.

She hears the sound of several footsteps running after her and curses her shitty luck. If Alastor decides to cut his date with Vox early to help her she's going to have to make it up to him big time.

It did not go through the first time for some reason, Niffty is so unhinged bless her crazy mind

[stars-of-kyber]

Kanthony + 38?

38- “You fainted…straight into my arms. You know, if you wanted my attention you didn’t have to go to such extremes.”

Ok, Anon, you inspired me.

Let's see Anthony and Kate and their completely crazy first date.

PS: I am a teacher. I am most certainly NOT a doctor nor do I claim to be. Most of the medical advice in this story came from @mimix007 who was a queen and helped me with the basic of humans.

Also, I NEED to thank all my girlies who read this but specially @waterlilyrose who embarked on this journey with me when I got the little lightbulb moment and sprinted and cheered me on me as I went through this whole mess today. Thank u <3

Enjoy!

If 24 hours earlier, someone told Kate Sharma she'd be sitting in a hospital room in the early hours of the morning, still in her nice green dress, heels and fancy lacy lingerie, her hair and make-up done, she would have called the person crazy. Maybe laughed to their face. 

And yet, there she was.

She’s been set up on a blind date by Ben, her coworker from the gallery. Apparently, she reminded him so much of his brother and he imagined they’d get along famously. 

Kate did not have the best track record with men, especially posh guys with more money than they knew what to do with, which was Ben’s family’s case, but her friend had shown her a photo and, well… the man was hot. Not just handsome. It was almost unfair how one man could be so sinfully attractive. 

Even if the date didn’t go anywhere, at least they could have a bit of fun. He looked like a guy who knew how to pleasure a woman in bed and Kate most certainly could use a guy like this in her life right now. Plus, Ben wouldn't set her up with someone who was a complete arse, would he? They were friends and he was a nice person, he wouldn't do something like that. 

Or maybe he would. Because Anthony Bridgerton seemed like a huge jerk. 

Anthony, that was Ben's brother's name, showed up to their date late, looking a bit worse to wear. Don't mistake her meaning, he was still one of the hottest men Kate'd ever lay her eyes on, but there were dark bags under his eyes and he looked pale and sweaty as if he was fighting off a nasty hangover. The first few buttons of his dress shirt were undone and his hair sticking up a bit as if he had run his hands through it a few times. She wouldn't judge him if he did though, his hair seemed perfect to run your hands through.

He didn't seem to be drunk. There was no telling alcohol smell and his speech was clear. But he wasn't really alright either. He pushed his food around on his plate without really eating and he barely touched a drop of the wine he had asked for. Hungover for sure. Kate tried interacting with him, asking questions and offering information about herself but Anthony looked distracted, taking a long time to answer her, if he listened to her at all.

By the time Anthony started excusing himself to go to the toilet,  Kate stood up as well. She was ready to tell him she was leaving and that if he hadn't wanted to have a date with her, he could have told her so and she wouldn't have wasted her time and energy trying to look her best. She really would have been less offended if he had just told her to her face he didn't want to meet her than whatever was going on that night. 

But before she could get more than two words out, Anthony's face went ghostly pale, his eyes rolled to the back of his head and he collapsed against her. They both went down, his skin clammy and feverish under her fingertips, his breaths heavy and raggedy. 

Kate was doing her best to remember the few first-aid lessons she'd taken in uni, but she wasn't sure how good that would be. The first step was always don't panic and she was already failing in that quite spectacularly. 

Perhaps he wasn't just being a rude arse, after all. 

Kate had yelled for someone to get an ambulance, they had patched him up in a gurney and Kate hadn't even thought twice before accepting the paramedic's help to climb in after him. 

Anthony had been rolled straight to surgery as soon as they rolled into the A&E and Kate was shown to a waiting room, a kind nurse telling her someone would give her an update soon. She tried calling Ben, to let him know what was going on, but somewhere during the chaos, her battery had died. She had Anthony's phone in her purse, but he had a password and all Kate managed to do was to block his phone for a full hour trying to guess it. 

It had been a couple of hours of waiting nervously when a doctor told her he had a problem with his appendix, but the surgery had been successful and her boyfriend would be up to a room soon and she could wait for him there. 

Kate only thanked the man and followed the nurse towards the lift without another word. What was she supposed to say? That they were on a sort-of-blind date, meeting for the first time and she had been sure he was a huge jerk until he passed out in her arms? 

No. That wouldn't do at all. Kate was just going to go along with it, wait for him to wake up and managed to call on a family member and when he was properly accompanied, she'd go home. That sounded like a reasonable plan.

And that's how Kate found herself half-dozing off on a not-very-comfortable hospital sofa on the sickbed of her sort-of-date as the first strakes of daylight started to colour the sky. 

That would most certainly be the craziest date Kate had ever been to. She doubted anything could ever come close to that. 

From the bed, Anthony groaned, squirming on the mattress before his eyes slowly started blinking awake. 

"What..." His voice was husky as he looked around, completely confused. "What happened?"

"You fainted…straight into my arms." Kate was up in a flash, reaching for the cup of water the nurse had instructed to give to him slowly. "You know, if you wanted my attention you didn’t have to go to such extremes.”

 He started to chuckle, which quickly turned into a pained whine, as he clutched his stomach. "Oh, ouch." 

"Oh God, I'm so sorry." Kate looked around desperately for something she could do to help, but of course, there was none. Damn her and her smart mouth. "I was trying to lighten up the mood."

"S'alright." Anthony waved her apology away. "Water?"

"Oh, yes! Here." Kate reached the side of the bed, helping him gently plop up enough to be able to sip on the cup. "Just go slow, the nurse said drinking too fast might make you sick.

"Too late for that, I guess." Kate looked up at him desperately, ready to bolt out to the corridor and find a nurse if he was feeling unwell, but instead, Anthony was smiling humorously at her. "Since I fainted and all." 

"That's not funny." She huffed, pushing the hair away from her face. 

"It is a little bit." 

"You had to have surgery!" She stared at him with narrow eyes. "Your appendix was inflamed. Or burst. Or something." 

"Which one was it?" Anthony groaned in pain as he let himself fall back against the soft hospital bed. "I think one of those things is considerably more severe than the other." 

"I don't know. I went to art school, not med school. " She rolled her eyes, crossing her arms in front of her chest defensively. "The doctor didn't tell me much and I was kinda nervous at the time to pay too close attention."

Kate thought he'd call her out on her stupid comment, or say anything about the situation he was in, but instead, he just turned his eyes on her and asked: "Can I have more water please?" 

"Right. Sure." Kate took the plastic cup back to the jar in the corner of the room, clearing her throat nervously. "I"m sorry I didn't call your family, by the way. My battery died and I couldn't unblock your phone."

"Thank God," Anthony whispered with a sigh as she stared at him with a raised eyebrow. "Please don't call them." 

"What do you mean?!" She squeaked. "You had surgery!" 

“Do you have any idea how much I'd hear for this?" Anthony looked at her face and then at the cup clutched to her hand. 

"Right, the water, sorry." Kate was back by the side of the bed. "What do you mean how much you'd hear?"

"I have a large family." He gulped the fresh water, sighing appreciatively. "My mother is... She's great but she's been telling me I need to slow down for a while now. If she learns I was sick and didn't get checked out, I wouldn't have a moment alone in the next two months."

"Trust me, I get the feeling. My stepmother is just the same." Mary Sharma was a force to be reckoned with when she wanted to be. She'd probably place Kate under house arrest and she didn't live in her family home anymore. "She'd probably force feed and not allow me out of the bed." 

"I have seven siblings." He chuckled and groaned again at her surprised face. 

"Seven!" 

"Yup." 

"I have one and she drives me insane." 

"My mum could have someone on every hour of the day sitting with me. I'd never be alone again." He told her dramatically. "I'd not put past her grounding me and taking away all my electronics." 

"I understand your suffering." Kate nodded sympathetically. "But I'm not letting you check out without anyone to watch over you. Is there a friend you can call?" 

"This would be Simon." Anthony shifted in bed with a whimper, trying to find a more comfortable position. "But he's gone and got engaged to my oldest baby sister, so I can't really trust him with it." He sighed. "He'd tell on me the moment the phone was off and Daph's almost as bad as my mother."

"Well, that would be less than ideal, I guess."  

"The only person I could trust to keep this quiet is Hyacinth, but somehow I don't see a 10-year-old being much help in this situation." He gave a half-shrug, clearly trying to keep his abdomen from jostling too much. "Well, her and Fran, but she's in Scotland and I won't have her miss classes to come watch over me." 

"Can't you talk to Ben?" Kate rested her elbow on the mattress next to his arm and her chin on her palm as she watched him gingerly reach up to muss his hair. 

"Ben's a tattletale and momma's boy. Mum can break him in less than a minute." 

"What's the least worse option, then?" 

"You really won't let me go on my own, will you?"

"Absolutely not." Anthony seemed to consider that for a moment before sighing defeatedly. 

"I'll end up calling Ben." He sighed dejectedly. "He'll probably be able to hold Mum back the longest. At least he's got a flat I can hide on for a bit."

"Sounds like a plan." They sat in companionable silence for a moment, Anthony's face twitching with discomfort as Kate chewed on her bottom lip, unsure of what to say or if she even should say anything at all. "I'm sorry for the date thing." He told her, the tip of his ears turning pink. "I promise I usually behave much better."

"Well, it is a bit funny... After all the panic passes, anyway." Kate chuckled awkwardly. 

"At least it's a story for the ages." His smile really was quite dashing, she had to admit. 

"That it is."  The silence that settled on them for a moment was a bit more light-hearted than the one before as Kate tried to gather the courage to speak. "Sorry, I really have to ask..." 

"Hum?"

"People say... Well, my sister had an inflamed appendix and that's a really painful thing." Anthony raised his eyebrow at her but did not speak. "And for you to faint, you were probably feeling pretty shity..." She trailed off, unsure of how to continue. "Why didn't... You could have just rescheduled the date, you know?" 

"I mean... yeah, I guess." His shrug was a bit self-conscious. "But I'm kinda used to some pain in my daily life. Like migraines from lack of sleep or gastritis from spending way too much time without eating or whatever stupid thing doctors like to go on about." Kate had to press her hand to her mouth to keep from laughing at the dismissive roll of his eyes. "And... I don't know... I really wanted to meet you. Ben talked a lot about you and, I'm not trying to be disrespectful or crude in any way but you're really beautiful." Kate felt a blush rise to her cheeks, unable to keep the tiny smile from creeping into her lips. "I wouldn't let a bit of normal pain get in the way of that." 

"I'd say you underestimated the levels of what's normal pain a bit there, didn't you?"

"I'll admit I didn't imagine it would get so much worse so fast." He admitted with a grim nod before his eyes softened as he turned them to her face, making heat pool even hotter in her cheeks. "Please tell me I didn't ruin things and I'll get another chance?"

"Well, that depends." Kate grinned, her eyes alight with mirth. "Will you faint on me again?" 

"Nop, never again." He shook his head, wincing as the movement sent a flare of pain up his side. 

"I suppose we can work something out then." His smile was so bright Kate desperately wished to feel it against her mouth. To feel if those lips were as soft and plump as they looked. And so, to hell with it, she did. 

Kate blamed the lack of sleep and the adrenaline and nerves from the night before for her poor impulse control. She leaned forwards, careful not to jostle the mattress too much and risk hurting him, and she pressed their lips together in the gentlest of kisses, just a brush followed by a little pressure before she pulled away. Anthony tried to chase her mouth, leaning forwards before grunting in pain. 

"Down boy." She laughed, something stirring at the pit of her stomach by the way his eyes darkened. 

"Come back here." His words were half a command, half a desperate plea. "Please." 

"You just had surgery." She reminded him with a gentle pat on his hand as she settled back on the seat, trying to ignore the spark of electricity that went through her arm at the touch. 

"One more." He pleaded, lacing their fingers together. "To help me heal faster." 

"Na-hum. You'll have to wait." She tutted at him. "I'm not having a doctor call me out for opening your stitches or something.”  

Anthony let his body rest in the bed, sighing in defeat, but he did not let go of her hand. Outside the window, the sun was slowly starting to show its bright face, making the sky turn a hundred different hues of blues, oranges and pinks. 

"Will you at least tell me how much the dinner was so I can refund you?" He asked and Kate froze in the spot, her eyes growing triple the size of her face. 

"Oh God..." She choked between a laugh and a desperate sob. Anthony's head snapped to look at her.  

"What?!" 

"You fainted and the ambulance came and they were taking you to the restaurant and I..." She covered her mouth with her hand, her face flooding with colour. "I didn't pay the bill." 

They stared at each other for a few silent moments before they burst out in laughter, Anthony clutching his side with a grimace. 

"Oh God, I can't believe I dined and dashed." Kate wanted to shove her head under a pillow, her face flooding with colour and her chest heaving from giggles she couldn't quite control. 

"Please stop making me laugh," Anthony begged, although it didn't seem he was having any success in stopping it either. "I just had surgery and laughing hurts."

"Hell! Sorry, oh my..." She snorted, burying her face in her palms, trying to control her breathing. "That's so embarrassing, oh lord..." 

And although it had been most certainly the weirdest date Kate had ever been to, she was quite certain it was one of the best ones, in the end. Well, after the panic passed, of course. 

Ben arrived a little more than two hours later and the moment he crossed through the room's large door, Kate was sure Anthony had made a mistake calling his brother and not his best friend because Ben looked livid. 

"What the hell is wrong with you?" The tallest man cried in a harsh tone, sending the two other people in the room, who had been talking since Anthony had woken up jumping in surprise. "Hey, Kate." He looked at her, his entire posture shifting for a moment. "Thanks for sitting with him." 

"S'all good, mate." She replied, blinking at the sudden change, and then Benedict's attention was back on his older brother, the sweet, funny man absolutely fuming. 

"I cannot believe you, Anthony Bridgerton! I don't even...." The painter breathed in deeply, making a visible attempt to calm down. "You had surgery...."

"Emergency surgery." Anthony corrected, which did not help at all in his brother's attempt at remaining calm. 

"You had SURGERY to remove your goddamn appendix and you didn't..." 

"It was my fault, Ben. My phone was down and..." Her friend stopped her words with a raised finger. 

"You did nothing wrong Kate, I'm actually really grateful for you sitting with him all night." His narrowed eyes didn't leave his brother's face. "You, on the other hand..."

"I am sick," Anthony warned. 

"How long have you been sick, you stubborn idiot?!" The youngest of the brothers roared. "That's why you looked like shit in Greg's competition last night!"

"I..." 

"And on Hyacinth's match!"  He looked accusingly at Anthony, who had the decency to look ashamed. "How much did you eat in the past two days?" 

"I don’t really see how..." The words were so low and jumbled Kate couldn't understand any of them. 

"Anthony!"

"Alright, you're annoying, Christ!" The eldest sibling finally spoke up. "I didn't eat anything, alright? I was feeling nauseous, couldn't keep anything down anyway." 

"You were drinking black coffee!" Benedict threw his hands up in the air in exasperation. "Why didn't you go to the goddamn doctor?! Are you trying to die?"

"You're being dramatic." 

"I'm so mad at you right now, I could punch you." 

"I didn't go to the doctor because I had a lot of shit to do, Benedict," Anthony spoke slowly. Apparently, his patience had run out. "I had a pile of documents waiting for me at work. There was Hy's game and Greg's swimming and Daphne's wedding planning. I sometimes have a stomachache, because according to that doctor you forced me to go, I have gastritis."

"You have gastritis because you spend days without any proper food, running on coffee and self-sacrifice, you pompous arse!" Ben retorted with a huff. "Hy and Greg would have understood if you missed ONE game or swimming competition. Daphne's wedding is more planned and organized than my life has been in the past, I don't know, ten years! And you haven't had a day off in three years, Anthony. The last time you did was because Hyacinth got a broken arm when she was seven." Ben clapped his hands in front of his face as if praying for something, although Kate wasn't exactly sure what. 

She couldn't judge Anthony too much. She worked two jobs and used to work three until she had a burnout crisis the year previous and Mary forced her to quit one, kept track of Edwina's grades, helped Mary with the house and the bills and still walked Newton every day. Her sleep schedule was erratic at best and she ate only because her stepmother called her periodically at meal times. 

Maybe Ben did have a point when he said she reminded him of his older brother. 

"I don't know why you're so mad at me." Anthony insisted. 

"You don't... You know what Ant, I'll tell you." The tallest brother lowered his hand with a strange fire in his eyes. "I'm mad because you think you are indestructible and you don't give a shit about your own health although you can spend literal hours lecturing us about ours. I'm mad because it didn't occur to you, at any point in the past week, to turn to me and say 'Ben, I'm feeling overwhelmed.' and..."

"I wasn't overwhelmed," Anthony scoffed in annoyance. "I had appendicitis." 

"It didn't occur to you, at any point, to turn to me, or to Simon, or to Daphne, or to anyone, to say 'I'm having a very strong pain in my abdomen and I can’t keep food down' and any of us would have gladly stepped up to help you with all the shit you needed to get done while you went to a goddamn doctor instead of having to get an emergency surgery in the middle of your date!" 

"Alright Benedict," Anthony mumbled with a mocking roll of his eyes. "next time I sneeze, I'll let..." 

Kate understood the reluctant feeling in Anthony's tone. It was hard to ask for help, especially when you had people depending on you for a long time. How did you turn to someone that came to you for absolutely everything for years and years and said 'I have too much on my shoulders, I need help.' without feeling like an absolute failure? And at the same time, without making them feel like failures because you never told them you were overwhelmed. 

Kate was also very, very bad at asking for help. 

"You know what, Anthony? I'm not going to try to reason with you. There is no point, you won't listen." Benedict sighed deeply, rubbing the bridge of his nose wearily. "I'm taking you to Mum's." 

"You're absolutely not." Anthony scoffed, trying to cross his arms stubbornly in front of his chest, but failing miserably when his entire face convulsed in pain. 

"I can't see how your sorry arse is going to stop me." Ben looked triumphantly at this older brother. "You are going to mum's and you are staying there until you are 100% recovered from your surgery and maybe  an extra week to be safe and you are going to eat three proper meals a day and work regular hours if mum allows you to work." 

"You're going to have to kill me," Anthony told his brother completely determined. 

"I am considering it." 

"I'm not going." 

"Oh, you are." Ben nodded his head and his grin was absolutely diabolical. If Edwina was looking at Kate like this, she'd probably have run for cover and it was clear in Anthony's face he would agree. "Please ask me how." 

"I'm not giving you the pleasure." Benedict just waved his grumpy brother's words away completely at ease. 

"It's not a problem, I'm telling you anyway." He rubbed his hands together and in Anthony's eyes, Kate could see he was considering just jumping out of the window not to suffer whatever fate his brother had planned for him. "Because I’ve already called mum," Ben lifted a finger, as if counting. "and Daph," One more finger up. "and I called your work and told them you're taking the next week as sick leave and are not to be disturbed." A third finger was lifted but he was clearly not done. "I have also already bribed Eloise with something she wants quite a whole lot so I think you'll be hard-pressed to get her to cooperate with you." With each finger that went up, Anthony's eyes went wider. "And to finish it off, I've spoken to Hyacinth and Greg." Benedict looked triumphant with his entire palm open in front of him. 

"What did you say to them?!" 

"I might or might not have implied that you are really sick and that if you don't rest, you might have a big health problem that will be a risk to your life." The taller man seemed to be feeling pleased to see Anthony so shocked in a way only a younger sibling could. "They're really scared, you know?" 

"So, you lied!" Anthony accused.

"No, I didn't, you lout! If you don't fucking rest you're going to rip a stitch and bleed inside out or something!" Benedict stormed. He had also been to Art school and was certainly not a doctor. "And honestly the worst they'll do is spend a shitton of time around you and you'd never complain about that." Anthony did not seem to have an answer for that. "What you really should be worried about is Daphne. She was talking about taking a few days from work to look after you." 

Honestly, if Anthony made an attempt to jump out of the window, Kate would probably help.

Anthony had been released from the hospital and into Benedict's clutches in the afternoon, with a list of medicine and doctors' orders to follow and several overprotective siblings to look after him at home. Kate did not envy him at all. 

She had awkwardly stood there as Anthony signed a pile of forms under his younger brother's watchful eye and asked them if anyone could call her an Uber, since her phone was dead, which immediately prompted Ben to offer to just drop her home. And that was how she found herself sitting in the back of a car with Anthony Bridgerton as his brother drove. 

He was sitting half-bent in what looked like an uncomfortable position, his mop of brown hair falling to his forehead, dark circles under his eyes. Kate just felt the desperate need to curl around him, have his arms around her, holding her tight. He had quite spectacular arms, really. 

She managed to fight back that one impulse, too afraid to hurt him if she tried. It didn't keep her from reaching out to his hand, lacing their fingers together. Anthony looked from her face to their joint hands back to her face, a tired but bright smile blooming on his lips. 

From the rear-view mirror, Kate could see Benedict's smirk, but she ignored it. She'd let him groat, at least for a little bit. He deserved it. 

The car pulled at the curb in front of her small block of flats and before she could think twice about it, Kate leaned forwards, kissing Anthony with another of those ridiculously soft kisses, their lips brushing together gently for a moment before she pulled away. 

"I thought you said I'd have to wait?" He asked, a satisfied smile gracing his lips as he looked at her. 

"Yeah, but I'm pretty sure you'll need something to help you keep sane in the next week." Kate giggled as he groaned. "And something for you to think of, you know? Until our next date. Once you're better." 

"I can't wait." 

And really neither could she.

Anthony was a model patient. An annoying one, the biggest pain in his siblings arse he could manage to be, but a good patient none the less. He took his meds, ate his food and rested. He complained and bitched and moaned every second of it, but he was doing it. He and Kate texted everyday and seeing a message from him light up her phone make a silly smile take over her face like a stupid teen with a crush. 

And finally, three weeks after their disastrous first day, Anthony got the all clear from the doctor and he was waiting for her at the door of a fancy restaurant, looking exactly like that hot, hot man Ben had shown her in a photo that had convinced her to accept the date. 

"You're not going to faint on me, are you, Mr Bridgerton?" Kate asked, with mirth on her smile as she approached him, enjoying the way his eyes raked darkly over her purple dress. 

"Not a chance, Miss Sharma." He barely got the words out before pulling her into his chest and finally, finally, kissing her properly. 

It was a kiss worth waiting for.

And a year and a half later, Anthony's eyes were still raking over her, this time with tears pooling on them as her mother walked her down the isle, the flowy white dress contrasting quite beautifully with her raven dark hair and the henna tattoos on her skin. 

"You're not gonna faint on me now, are you, Mr Bridgerton?" Kate asked for the thousenth time, smiling up at him as she let go of Mary's hand and took his. The smile he offered back was as bright as the sun. 

"Not a change, Mrs Bridgerton." 

Truly, that first date had been one of the best things in her life, after all. 

[fandomgirlz01]

Author {Faith}: 

Omg guys… we’ve hit it. I am beyond so very thankful that you all love my work so much that you are willing to follow along this crazy journey me and Nat decided to go on a long time ago. It feels like yesterday that I asked Nat to be my editor on a book I wanted to start to try writing {my Colby Brock book on wattpad…}, but in reality it's really now it’s been since August 8th 2019 when we did start the book. The book has since grown, but over the last three almost four years now we've primarily been on tumblr and have LOVED it so so so much. As some of you probably know, I {Faith} started out on wattpad and I used to be a firm believer that writing over there was the best place to write on even though I moved over to reading on tumblr a LONG time ago, but as I read more and more on tumblr I started to make friends with writers on tumblr. As I started making those friends, wattpad seemed to change as well as some of said friends encouraging me to move over to tumblr. 

So with that being said I talked it over with Nat and together we made the decision to also write on here. I believe it was one of the best decisions I've ever made {with Nat’s help} because today I find that I absolutely LOVE writing on here so much more than I do wattpad. I Love how you guys are so encouraging and sweet on here, I don't think I've really come across one mean person on here and while I know they are out there, I am so so glad I haven't met one yet. I LOVE all of you so much and it blows me away that all of you are following us and you guys are what push me to write, really you are. I am so incredibly thankful for all of you and I’m so excited for all of you to see what’s coming next. I can’t even begin to thank you all for the love you guys have for them as well as me and Nat. More is coming soon I promise! So so much more is coming, we even have added and are adding onto who we write for. Anyway to celebrate you guys we are doing this sleepover as well as opening up requests again, although I am {Faith} very behind on writing right now so if you have already requested an imagine and We have not posted it yet, just know I am indeed working on some of them. 

Just message us and I will personally give you an update on where your request is. If you guys wish to put in a request just please remember to be patient with me as I work on all we have coming out for you. I love you all and I hope you all enjoy this sleepover that we have created for you all. Another will be out when we hit 5,000. Keep reblogging and loving our stories up so we see all of your love. Really thank you all, so so much it means the world to me, I really can’t thank you all enough. 

Editor {Nat}: 

Holy moly I can't believe we've reached 1,000 followers! We are so grateful for each and every one of you and appreciate how much love you have given our stories. Like Faith mentioned, we've been working on fanfics together for about 4 years! It seems that time has gone by so fast and as the editor, it's been incredible to watch Faith's writing skills improve so much. It has been so much fun to edit all of her stories and I am so excited for everything that is coming in the future. You guys are amazing and we love you all so much!! To celebrate 1,000 followers, you can interact with us and feel free to ask us any questions, play a game with us, or just say hello! Thank you again for enjoying our stories!!

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[sequinsmile-x]

Stained Glass Windows - Chapter Twenty Seven

Life was complicated, but they wouldn't have it any other way.

-x-

Hi friends!!

Stained Glass Windows is now officially 6 months old!! Which is crazy. Thank you so much for the love and the comments and everything else. I really enjoy writing this version of them and will continue to write them as long as I know you're enjoying reading about them <3

Please let me know what you think!

-x-

Words: 2.3k

A full list of warnings for the fic can be found on the Series Master List and will be updated as we go along.

Read over on Ao3, or below the cut

Emily groans as they walk into their apartment, stretching her arms over her head as she watches Aaron walk past her. There was a tension in his frame that usually wasn’t present in their home, anger that he had not so subtly carried back with him all the way from San Fransisco, much heavier than the weight of both of their go-bags slung over his shoulder as he heads for the laundry room. 

She’d watched as he got more and more frustrated as the case went on, as if working with Sam Cooper and his team hadn’t originally been his idea. She knew it was mostly to do with Mick Rawson, his flirting with her at any given opportunity relentless, despite the fact she was now undeniably visibly pregnant and unresponsive. Part of her was surprised Mick hadn’t actually turned into stone because of how Aaron had been staring at him, the lines between their professional and personal lives blurred as he clenched his fists by his side whenever Mick spoke to her in Cooper’s team's office. Whatever tension had been building in Aaron only got worse after they returned from the takedown, his jaw as tight as she’d ever seen it as Mick bragged about how he’d saved JJ’s life, a smirk on his face as he winked at Emily across the room. 

She smiles as she feels the now familiar, but still incredible, bubbling sensation in her stomach, and she places her hand on her bump. 

“Hi Nugget,” she hears the door to the washing machine being closed with more force than necessary and she shakes her head as she rubs a circle on her stomach, “Let’s go see why Daddy is so grumpy.” She walks towards the living room and stretches again, her body sore from the uncomfortable mattress in their hotel room and the long flight home. She sits on the couch and smiles as Aaron walks out of the laundry room, stopping him on his journey to the kitchen by holding her hand out to him, “Come sit with me for a bit.” 

A small smile flashes across his face, “It’s late you need to eat-”

“Please,” she says, knowing it’s playing dirty, that he’d never deny her, “Just for a little bit and then I’ll eat whatever balanced, healthy thing you have planned for dinner.” 

He sighs and nods as he joins her on the couch. She leans into his side and smiles as his hand automatically finds its way to her belly. Ever since she’d started to feel the baby move a couple of weeks ago he was desperate to feel it himself and it made her heart flip in her chest, the love he felt for her and their unborn child was enough to make her want to burst into tears at any given moment. She places her hand over his and rests her head against his shoulder and she hates that he’s still tense, that there's still a tightness in how he is holding himself together.

“You shouldn’t let him get to you,” she says carefully, running her fingers in circles over the back of his hand. 

“Who?” He asks, his voice gruff in the same way it had been since he’d watched Mick flirt with her as he passed her a bottle of ginger ale whilst everyone else drank beer before they left California. 

“Rawson.”

He clenches his teeth and swallows thickly, pushing down bitter jealousy that he knows he shouldn’t feel, “I wasn’t letting him get to me.” 

She laughs and looks at him, her eyebrows raised in challenge, “Seriously, honey? Because at one point I thought the guy was going to turn to stone.” 

He sighs and looks at her, well aware that he was caught out. He’d never been able to keep how he felt from her, not even when they first met. He now knew that was one of the reasons he hated being around her at first, so unfamiliar with the feeling of being an open book, of being so easily read, that it made him not trust her. Now he, usually, loves it. Glad that after a lifetime of being misunderstood, of slowly watching Haley understand him less and less as they grew apart, that he had someone who could see through the walls he’d built when he was too young to realise he’d even picked up the tools. 

He knew Emily loved him, and he trusted her. He knew she’d never stray, that she was loyal and kind, and that she wanted this life they were building together. But there was still a voice in the back of his head telling him that he wasn’t good enough for her. That she could do better. 

And he lived in fear of her one day realising that. 

“It’s just…” he says, shaking his head at himself, laughing bitterly at his own insecurities, “He’s your type.” 

She pulls away from him, her eyebrows shooting into her hairline as irritation licks at her insides, her emotional control no longer entirely her own thanks to her raging hormones. 

“My type?”

Aaron hears the barely disguised annoyance in her voice and he sighs, “He’s handsome, and cocky and British and…I don’t know. I could see you going for a guy like him.” 

She stares at him, her mouth open as she chuckles humourlessly, her eyes narrowed, “You do remember I’m pregnant with your baby right?” She asks, glaring at him as she holds up her left hand, her engagement ring sparkling on her finger, “I’m engaged to you. I signed the fucking paperwork to buy us our dream house last week. You have got to be-”

“Em, sweetheart,” he says, cutting her off and placing his hand on her thigh before she can spiral any further into anger, “I know. And I’m not saying…” he blows out a steady breath, “I trust you. I’m worried that one day you might realise you settled for me, when you could have had someone who is worthy of you.” 

Any annoyance, any anger at him for what she had thought he was implying, drains out of her, causing her to visibly deflate in front of him. She feels tears press at the back of her eyes and a sound that was somewhere between a laugh and a sob escapes her. It makes her ache. Like she wants to cry and fight everyone who ever hurt him, anyone who ever made him feel like he was anything less than exactly who she’d been looking for her whole life. 

“You think you aren’t good enough for me?” She asks, watching his face closely for a reaction. He looks down at their now joint hands in her lap and she sighs, shaking her head before she shifts forward. She cups his face and forces him to look at her, “Aaron, I love you-” 

“Em-”

“No, you’re going to listen to me,” she insists, shifting even closer to him, almost in his lap, “I love you. And I love our life and Jack and Nugget,” she says, both of them chuckling softly at the nickname, “And I wouldn’t want to do this with anybody else,” she scrunches up her nose in distaste, “Much less with Mick Rawson. And you’re the best man I’ve ever met,” she shakes her head at him when he scoffs, “You are. You’re kind, even though you don’t want anyone to know that. And you’re handsome and loving and really fucking good in bed. I will spend the rest of my life reminding you of all of that if you need me to.” 

He chuckles, leaning forward to press his forehead against hers, “The rest of your life?” 

She hums and nods, “The rest of my life. I don’t wear this ring just for decoration,” she says, kissing him, smiling against his lips, “So no need to get jealous about arrogant assholes in leather jackets, ok?” 

He nods, although he still feels the tendrils of insecurity wrapped around his lungs. “Ok.” 

“Good,” she says, kissing him once more before she shifts backwards, her hand on her stomach again, “Now make whatever gross healthy thing you were going to make for dinner, Nugget and I are hungry,” she groans as something in her back pulls, “And sore,” she grimaces as he stands up, “I might have to start packing that pregnancy pillow in my go-bag and put all my clothes in yours.” 

The mention of it makes him pause his journey towards the kitchen and he turns back to look at her, his hands on his hips as he watches her sit with one hand on her back and one on her belly. It brings back the fear he’d felt when he saw JJ have a gun pulled on her, well aware that if Emily had been out in the field it would have been her. She’d always been fearless in those situations, almost reckless with her own safety. 

And it terrified him.

She was relegated to the precinct wherever they want, something she had readily agreed to when they found out she was pregnant, but that didn’t mean she was out of danger. They’d had showdowns with unsubs in precincts before, they’d had them in the damn bullpen, and it made him feel like he couldn’t protect her. 

Like he couldn’t protect them. 

He clears his throat, knowing he’d have to tread carefully with any suggestion about changing what they’d agreed months ago. He walks towards the kitchen and opens the fridge, ready to start preparing dinner.

“You could always start staying behind with Garcia,” he says casually, pulling vegetables out of the fridge, “You know she’d love the company.” 

Emily sighs, closing her eyes as she breathes out slowly in an attempt to push down her irritation again. They had a plan. She would go on cases until she reached the start of her third trimster and then she’d stay back in Quantico until her maternity leave started. Then after the baby she’d start a job in another department, the details already on their way to being all lined up. 

It was something that they hadn’t told the team yet. 

She knew it was what she wanted, what was right for her and her baby, but it was still a tough decision. She loved her job, she loved the family she had found in the team that came along with it, but she loved her baby more. She’d made the choice her mother had never been able to make for her. 

They had a plan.

“We said we’d wait until I was 28 weeks,” she says tensely, standing up and crossing her arms over her chest as she joins him in the kitchen, “I’m only 19 weeks.” 

He looks up at her from the kitchen counter, “I know, but-”

“But nothing,” she cuts him off, “We agreed. You can’t just…change your mind.” 

He sighs, placing his hands on the counter, “JJ almost got shot today.” 

She scoffs, “So…what, you think you have to protect us now?” She asks, her lungs stuffed full of anger, “I am perfectly capable of protecting the baby. In fact, protecting Nugget is entirely on me at the moment,” she seethes, pointing at her stomach, “I am staying behind doing victimology on every damn case in those precients that smell like bad coffee and men who haven’t discovered what deodorant is. I am taking all the damn prenatal vitamins and eating all the fucking rabbit food you are making me because I know it’s the best thing for my kid,” she shakes her head at herself as she wipes tears from her cheeks, her frustration burning hot against her skin, “So don’t act like I would do anything to put us in danger.” 

Aaron feels guilt vibrate in his chest and he walks over to her, placing his hands on her waist as he pulls her in, grateful when she doesn’t shy away from his touch. A sign he needed that at least some of her anger was fuelled by her hormones. 

“I know that, sweetheart,” he says, assuring her, “I know.”

She nods, blowing out a breath as she feels the anger pass as quickly as it had appeared, replaced with something she can’t even name as tears continue to fall down her cheeks. 

“I’m not ready to be done with the BAU, Aaron. And as soon as I stop going on cases that’s it. I’ll be helping, but…I won’t be part of the team anymore really.” she says, leaning into his palm as he cups her cheek, “I know leaving is the right thing to do. I want to do it, I want to…” she chokes on a laugh, “I want to be different to my mom.”

He sighs, his guilt only increasing as he tightens his hold on her, his fingers trailing through her hair. He kisses her temple, soothing her with nonsense against her skin until she stops crying. 

“You already are, Em. You’re putting the baby first and Nugget isn’t even born yet.” He says, and nods against him, grasping at the back of his shirt, the lack of contact with her mother louder than it had ever been. Elizabeth’s choice once again clear. He pulls back from her and kisses her forehead. “28 weeks.” 

She smiles at him, relief unfurling in her stomach, and she wipes her cheeks, “28 weeks.” 

He kisses her before he lets her go, walking back to the counter to carry on making dinner, “Come on, I’ll make your rabbit food and then you can have some ice cream.”

“With sprinkles?” She asks, taking a seat on one of the stools at the kitchen counter, having to balance herself slightly differently than she usually would. 

He raises an eyebrow at her, “On your salad?” 

She rolls her eyes and laughs, the exact response he’d been looking for, “On my ice cream, you jerk.” 

-x-

Tag list:

@ssa-sparks, @lukeclvez, @lyds102, @glockleveledatyourcrotch, @hotchnissenthusiast, @danadeservesadrink, @ssamorganhotchner, @emilyprentissisgod, @notagentprentiss, @freesiasandfics, @emilyshotchniss, @thecharmingart, @paulitalblond, @hancydrewfan, @camille093, @whitecrossgirl, @moonlight-2-6, @rawr-jess, @florenceremingtonthethird, @jareauswife, @ms-black-a, @beebeelank, @aubreyprc, @zipzapboingg, @psychopath-at-heart, @criminalmindsgonewrong, @fionaloover, @kinqslcys, @prentissinred, @ccmattis-22, @denvivale317, @thrindis, @hotchsguccitie, @cmfouatslota77, @alexblakegf, @aliensaurusex, @prentissxhotch, @emobabeyy, @victoiregranger, @stormyweatherth, @wanderingdreamer009, @ssablackbird, @luhwithah, @lex13cm, @prentiss-theorem, @dont-emily-me, @mrs-ssa-hotch, @jocyycreation, @itsmytimetoodream, @hotchnissgroupie, @controversialpooh, @capsshinyshield, @canuck-eh

Join my tag list here!

[superblysubpar]

we'll call it love masterlist

Hey, thanks for being here - whether you binged the series or have been here the whole year or you're literally just reading this and don't care to read the series. I know it's a little (okay a lot) cheesy to make a whole post saying thank you for a silly little fanfic but I've had a tough year, and I didn't want to make the post longer and well, here we are. Don't read it if you don't want to or you think it's cringe.

I wrote the "Rocketman is Dingus. Dingus is Steve. Steve is Rocketman" scene on November 25th, 2022 in the back of my mother in law's car while shopping. I had no real vision other than Friends With Benefits, modern AU, use the songs off of the Uncanny Valley album by COIN, reader hates love and duh - Steve falls in love with everything that moves. Over the course of basically an entire fucking year, a short, 4 "parts" "minseries" turned into this. This lovely, wonderful, infuriating most days, pain in my ass series that I'm going to cherish for the rest of my life. I learned and discovered so much about writing and about myself while creating it. We're truly almost at a year, and originally, when this idea came to me, I was back on my old blog and I just can't even express to you how crazy it is to know the notes I got on first fics to this journey to the new blog and this series...I feel like I can't say thank you enough or express how crazy it is to me and how truly grateful I am. While writing this I was thoroughly broken down to just a sobbing mess multiple times by comments, messages, and love left for the story - I have your messages saved, and they mean more to me than you could ever know. I made new friends while writing it, I daydreamed about these fucking idiots while on my first international trip, I'm chasing crazy dreams and it's truly all because of this story and you guys. All because of your patience and encouragement as I strung you along for almost an entire year just for a silly little fanifc.

A special and specific thank you to @sweetsweetjellybean I love you I love you I love yoouuuu and I know this was a way bigger commitment than either of us foresaw when I asked you to beta for me. Hours, days, and months of friendship and encouragement can't be acknowledged with a simple thank you, but it's the best I got. And another special thank you to @loveshotzz who not only is also an avid supporter, editor, and encourager, but gave me all the Chicago daydreams and sightseeing tour that literally is at the heart of this entire series. Red Hot Ranch idiots, Steve's apartment, Replay, the train, and many more things wouldn't exist without her.

Thank you for your endless support, for literally taking my hands and dragging me across the finish line, I don't deserve either of you 💛

thank you all for your constant patience, encouragement, and love. And thank you for letting me tell Rocketman and Y/N's story 💛

[namazunomegami]

11 and 21 for the writer ask thing!!

Omg, girl, you're a blessing!

11. Books and/or authors who influenced you the most

No doubt, Frank Herbert is the one who influenced me the most. Like, he literally changed my writing style and techniques from the basics when I read Dune. I absolutely abide his rule that "if you want to be a great writer, write about what you know best" or something along the lines. Basically, write about what you're interested in and willing to put effort in it. In Herbert's case, he was interested in how environtments change people and vice versa, to me I guess it's how people have an effect on each other and I know dysfunctonial relationships like the back of my hand.

I also like subverting tropes in the way that he did with Dune and the whole "hero's journey/chosen one" thing. And using an omnipresent/omniscient narrator, constantly switching POVs in a scene.

It's so funny but I think I should thank Tarantino for influencing me when it comes to writing dialogues. You shouldn't be afraid to put some mundane stuff when your characters are talking, and you can deliver tension with a few carefully chosen words in these mundane segments. And also building your characters through conversations, because that's how real people do when they don't know each other. I always circle back to Inglourious Basterds which is understandable, it's one of my fave movies all time but this movie is the epitome of building up tension in just dialogue alone, and the setting, the character's manerism is just spice to the whole scene.

But some of the writers here on this site are great sources of inspiration too. If I want to write a fic that makes your skin crawl, I read something from @/rush-the-stars or @/banjjakz since their writing styles will never fail to amaze me.

21. Who is/are your favorite character(s) to write?

I think Geto deserves to own a fave title for the sheer amount of shit that I wrote for him. There're countless wips that yall don't know of or won't plan on sharing.

But I like morally questionable, emotionally constipated guys who act like nothing fazes them but go soft for one person. And maybe... have crazy ways to protect them from literally anything. Or not. I have fics and wips of really shitty characters who only want to hurt the reader and they're generally delighted by their pain. But hey, don't judge me, this is a dark content blog.

Characters that can give you a bit of a psychic damage if they want to. The ones that are so complex it makes me want to pull them apart to see their layers and explore them.

To talk about my wips a lil bit, writing Alastor and Asmodeus were quite the fun! I enjoyed every single sentence that I came up with for their dialouges. For you, I really want to elaborate on what I like about writing Adam but sadly I couldn't spend enough time with his fic yet.

About readers... I like the ones who are blusterous, driven, observant, stubborn and even petty to the point to make stupid decisions because that was the only way they saw it right. Shy and inherently submissive readers (even tho that my readers are submissive in sexual situations) kinda make me feel cornered and limited.

When I was thinking about how to answer this ask, an original character, Lotte came up in my mind as my fave character to write. She's the main character of my novel and recently reread the doc (that shit deserves a massive rewrite) and I just love her so much and all the time I can spend in her head. All that pain, repressed anger, petty defiance yet the rest of her emotions are dull and muted from all the suffering she experienced. And even tho she is fucked up beyond repair, her heart is still filled with love, an almost chivalrous kind of need to protect anything that's dear to her. And the arc her character leads me through is just amazing. This is the character I love to write.

[christyscancerjourney]

Hello my name is Christy. I'm 45 and living with breast cancer. I was diagnosed with breast cancer in August of 2021. By the time I caught it, it had already traveled from my breast, neck and lung all at different stages. I have 3 amazing kids (well young adults) 4 amazing, beautiful and handsome grandbabies and (2 more on the way) and had only been married to my husband for 8 months (both our first marriage and only). There has been a lot of getting used to during this journey for all of us. We have had to navigate through every obstacle thrown our way and somehow, we get through it stronger each time, I lost my mom in September and sat by her side until she took her last breath. Who was my rock for as long as i can remember. I have an amazing stepdad that has never turned his back on me and is still here for me no matter what.

I have had covid 2 times, i have had a mastectomy, a brain tumor removed the size of a lime that grew in a months' time. When i got diagnosed covid was a scary thing and I had to do all my chemo and radiation treatments alone. Not that that was an issue because I love quietness. Just to be in my own thoughts and world. Don't get me wrong I love the support system I have. I couldn't ask for a better group to get me through the ups and downs of having breast cancer and all that goes along with it. I love each and every one that is sitting beside me during this difficult journey, Thank you to everyone.

When being diagnosed you have a million and one things going through your head all at once. How will I ever get through this, will this be the death of me, who will be standing beside me throughout all the crazy ups and downs, how will I get through side effects they tell me I will go through during treatment, how will I remain strong and positive through everything life is about to throw at me, and most importantly will I be able to show my husband, kids, grandbabies, family and friends just how strong I am?

Well its going on over a year and a half and I'm still positive, still here to show everyone love, showing my kids that it is ok to go through something terrible and do it with a smile on your face, do it with your head held high, do it with knowing it could be worse, and most importantly still have compassion in your heart (we might not see it but someone has it worse than you). We all deal with situations differently and that is ok. We are allowed to have our moments of weakness it's about how we pull ourselves out of the weakness to get back on our feet and keep moving forward in life. Don't let a situation we have no control overtake over our lives.

For my kids I want them to know that they are my whole world. That being their momma is one of the biggest blessings I have ever been given in my life. That even if I am feeling weak, drained and sick that I will always be there for them in every single way possible. I will be their biggest cheerleader cheering them along. That I love every day forever always to the moon and back.

For my husband I'm so thankful that I have you by my side. I know that I love you whole heartedly and that we have had to go on this crazy journey so soon into our marriage and at times its tough. I couldn't ask for a better husband, stepdad, and grandpa for our family. I know that it's irritating at times, but I know this will only make us stronger in the end. I love you so much Nick.

To my family and friends, I want to thank you for routing me along in this crazy journey and for being by my side being a great and amazing support system that I so desperately never knew I would need. You guys' rock and are so amazing. I love each and every single one of you.

Thank you for taking time to read a little about me. My plan is to put my story out there for others to see. I hope that I can be an inspiration to others in this crazy cancer journey. I will try and post once a week to share what I am going through and how I'm feeling week by week treatment by treatment.

[highwiredazeken]

BACK INTO THE GAP WITH TOM BAILEY OF THOMPSON TWINS

Tom Bailey and the Thompson Twins are about to hit the road on the Totally Tubular Festival – including a local stop at the YouTube Theater in Inglewood on June 29th!  Also featured on the tour are Thomas Dolby, Modern English, Men Without Hats, and a whole lot more!  Recently celebrating the 40-year anniversary of the iconic Into The Gap release, expect Tom Bailey and the Thompson Twins to perform selections from that album as well as many other fan favorites from a vast and epic career in music.  Highwire Daze recently interviewed Tom Bailey to discuss the forth coming Totally Tubular Festival, the 30th anniversary of the first Babble album, a look at his solo Science Fiction endeavor, and other topics of intrigue.  Read on…

We’re here with Tom Bailey of the Thompson Twins.  You recently completed the 40th anniversary of the Into the Gap Tour. How did that go, and what were some of the highlights? It went very well, thank you. And it was an amazing thing to do after 40 years. Some of those songs, I hadn’t performed for 40 years. Some of them had never been performed. I think one of them was never performed live. So, it was something of an undertaking, and we enjoyed it so much. It’s a new band, of course, and the interpretations of the songs were contemporized, you might say, but very recognizable. And they get a big response because the people who come to those shows remember that album, and they’re mentally, if not vocally, singing along with it.

Was it a challenge to actually learn some of these songs that you’ve hardly ever played or have never played? Well, of course, it’s a challenge. Challenge is a good thing, but I have a band of amazing musicians, and we got stuck into it, and the results were very good. We were happy.

When you look back on Into the Gap and the fact that it’s been 40 years, what do you think of the album now in retrospect? Well, it’s one of the ones that I’m most pleased with, from the catalog of output over the years. I think we were at the peak of our abilities in one way or another. And it was also, strangely enough, quite an easy album to make, in the sense that it just flowed out without great disputes or lack of direction or anything. It just was really clear what we had to do, and the focus was there. So, yes.

What are you looking forward to the most about the upcoming Totally Tubular Festival? We won’t get the chance to play at such length because our set length is much shorter on the festival. I think there are 7 bands, so that’s going to be exciting. We’ll start… I think we’ll have to start fairly early in the evening to get 7 bands through, and whoever’s on stage management will have their work cut out for them, I think.

But anyway, one of the big thrills for me is co-headlining Thomas Dolby, which is an idea that’s been a long time coming. We worked together on my 2nd album. He played some synthesizers on that. And so, he was kind of instructive. He’s one of the early synth guys in the UK. And so, he was influential in getting me going there as well.

But we’ve never actually been on the same stage. And in fact, for years, we’ve been out of touch with each other but bumped into him at an ’80s festival a couple of years back, and the idea of doing something together came up, and here we are. It’s come to fruition.

In Los Angeles, she’ll be performing at the YouTube theatre. I was wondering, what are some of your favorite memories of playing here in Los Angeles? Well, of course, Los Angeles is a beautiful and crazy place. So, my memory of arriving there for the first time was kind of unbelievable. I think after an overnight journey in the snow going through the mountains and then arriving on a sunny day, and Sunset Boulevard, I could not believe the kind of dream come true of Hollywood. But it’s also an intense place to be. It always seems like one of the important gigs of the tour.

And I think also, because of some of the radio stations that supported us there, like KROQ, for example, some songs were famous there that didn’t create so much of a wave elsewhere. And that’s interesting, isn’t it? That of the songs you write, sometimes 1 is a hit in one place but not another, and there was a particular B side that got played a lot on KROQ that people wanted to play live, which we never do. This is a strange thing.

I tend to remember that they were playing like Passion Planet and Tokyo. That’s right. Yes.

I love those songs. Did you even play those songs live anymore? No. No, not at all. I think, I referenced a little bit of Passion Planet just because so many people have asked me about it, but I don’t do the whole song at all. And elsewhere in the world, no one ever mentions it, but in Southern California, they love it.

You have another anniversary that’s happening this year. It’s a 30-year anniversary of The Stone by Babble. When you look back on that and the fact that it’s been 30 years, what do you think of that album now in retrospect? And strangely enough, by coincidence, that was the other album, as well as Into the Gap, that just kind of flowed out of the process so easily. I love that record. It was never destined to be a hit because it’s essentially an underground project, but I think creatively it was very satisfying. And I love to hear it now. And it’s a different kind of music; it’s long form. The songs are much longer; they have long introductions. These days, people write pop songs starting with the chorus. Back in the day, in the days of Babble, we would take 3 minutes to even get to the first verse.

Let’s talk about Science Fiction that you released in 2018. For people who haven’t heard it, how does Science Fiction and your solo work compare to what you do in the Thompson Twins? I’m working in the kind of mainstream pop area again on that record. So, it kind of picks up where I left off with The Twins. And it was relatively easy to make that move, if you know what I mean, because of The Twins. Because of the way we divided the tasks in the three-piece twins, basically, music was my responsibility.

So, it was me doing it and me doing it again on my solo record. So, there’s a great similarity in the process. Science Fiction is a solo record in as much as it’s just me playing anything. No one else is really involved apart from some backing vocals. And yes, I enjoyed writing those songs. Again, it flowed fairly easily. It doesn’t always happen that way, but you’ve actually picked 3 records that were (fun to do).

I believe you are performing Science Fiction live, or you did on the Into The Gap tour. Tell me about that song and the inspiration behind it. Yes, we often include the song Science Fiction. Well, it’s a funny thing because, as I’ve said in the past, I’m not particularly a fan of science fiction as a genre, because, to me, I don’t read or watch those movies that people would suspect from that song. To me, science fiction is a way of looking at the present because it re-contextualizes the problems of now.

And so, in that sense, I’m a big fan of science fiction or the perspective that it brings. But as you may know, the song really has another level, another meaning, which is about dragging someone away from their obsession with science fiction and bringing them back to now. That’s really what the song is about.

Would you like to record any other solo music or even Thompson Twins music in the future? I’m always writing and recording, so there’s all sorts of stuff in the can in various states of repair, and whether or not we make another album, I don’t know. It won’t be this year because Into the Gap is being re-released. It’s been remastered and is coming out in various formats like Dolby Atmos, and stuff. So, I don’t want to get in the way of that. And that’s going to be the big thing for me this year.

Another one of your albums is about to celebrate 40 years, and that’s, of course, Here’s to Future Days. Any plans to do any kind of tour with that? No, some people have mentioned, “Hey, why not?” But they don’t get much time off these ideas; people do that, but it’s like, we’ll see. I can’t imagine that, performing the whole of the Future Days album would be as easy or as satisfying as it was with Into the Gap, but we’ll see. I’ll have a look at some of that material again and try and include it.

Do you ever hear from Alannah Currie or Joe Leeway from time to time? Yes, but partly because of the re-release of Into the Gap, there’s been a lot of email discussions going on about how best to do that. But I also caught up with Alannah in New Zealand about a month ago. We had coffee, and she just moved there again, and I was just about to leave to come out on tour. So, we had a meeting and everything was cool. Everything’s good. She seems in great shape, and I think Joe’s happy as well, so it’s good.

Are you currently involved with any other bands or projects outside of what you’re doing now? Not directly at this very moment, but always part of me is as a gun for hire. I like to do that from time to time. I just played on a couple of other people’s records. One actually interestingly enough, an original Thompson Twins member made an almost kind of an Americana country record. And he said he wanted some keyboards. And so, he sent it to me, and I played piano on it. So, things like that are always great fun.

Tom Bailey, gun for hire. I like that. Occasional gun for hire, we should say.

Ken: Occasional gun for hire. Okay, there you go. All right. Do you have any messages for Thompson Twins fans out here in Los Angeles who are reading this now? Absolutely looking forward to seeing familiar faces and new faces when we get there. It’s going to be wonderful. Touring these days is a big deal for me, and I love doing it. So, to be performing anywhere is a dream come true, but LA is one of the big ones. Let’s have a party!

(Interview by Ken Morton – Live Photos by Jack Lue)

Thompson Twins on Facebook Totally Tubular Festival Official Home Page

[knightofameris]

ames :D it’s jules🧸!!!

woah!! i’m so glad i caught you in a (un)timely manner :D three months isn’t toooo bad of a wait, right? KWKDWK

you’re right, you never changed your URL—i don’t know what april 2023 me had going on but i am glad i’ve remembered the right one all this time! i don’t use tumblr that much anymore either but i do log on from time to time just to see what’s up!! i’m so glad you’re doing well, it makes me so happy to hear about what you’ve accomplished and what you’re excited about for the future. :)

i am so so so proud of you. i know you have talked about how your home life was never the best and to know that you have made your own life for yourself and are away from such an environment genuinely brings me so so so much joy!! AGHH ames, you deserve it. i hope you know you deserve to feel so accomplished of yourself + proud of yourself, and that i’m proud of you too! and hey, no one ever said you had to stick to one thing in life >:D so yeah if you end up switching career paths, go ahead and do it! i support you no matter what you do!

AHHHH!!! A BOYFRIEND!!!! he sounds so so so cute i hope you two are doing good now!! i love that you two can talk to each other about anything and be comfortable like that :3 and of course of course, a prerequisite for being a bf is to be able to play games and watch anime together >:3 i hope everything goes well for you two no matter what, and that you find happiness <3

i’m glad you’re doing better mentally, hun <3 burnout sucks ass and having no passions for anything definitely sucks the life out of you… but YAY! one piece!! i still…have yet….to get into it….my friends are into it + so is the guy i’m seeing right now KSMDSK should i get into it??? is this a sign?????

thank you for all the sweet words ;D my journey has definitely been a little bit … hm. crazy? than i would have wanted?

(TWs up ahead for unhealthy coping mechanisms, breakdowns, depression, anxiety, anger issues + toxic relationships. if you’re not okay with that it’s completely okay! i’ll put a TLDR at the end of where you don’t have to read too explicit stuff)

it has been an incredibly wild ride for me, even though it’s been only 9 months since i initially sent that ask. i graduated and started college late august and went through probably the absolute worst month and a half of my life; i got broken up with after a 2 year relationship, lost my entire high school friend group including my best friend, almost lost my childhood friend group, dealt with a LOT of mental health issues, and just overall was not having a very good time. to be clear, i was in the wrong in my relationship and i denied it so much of the time until it ended up kicking me in the damn ass. i dealt with a LOT of home issues/past trauma, which impacted my relationships with my pre-college friends + ex, and in the end, my breakup was the straw that broke the camel’s back. my pre-college friends dropped me with no warning and everyone from before turned their backs on me, basically. i spiraled into a depression and since i already struggled with anxiety + anger issues, it was rough, INCREDIBLY rough. it was like you were talking to a wall, almost? i would have breakdowns during the dorms and lashed out and was just coping in an incredibly unhealthy way, to the point where one night i ran off. i ended up having to have what’s called an emergency counseling session at my college with a counselor and the community director, and since then have been going to therapy.

TLDR; because of mental health issues, i lost a lot of people who meant the world to me right as college started (i.e. bf of 2 years and bestfriend). this, along with the adjusting to college life + past trauma, had me seeking therapy early october.

HOWEVER, i am doing so much better now! and i can say this confidently. i started therapy, rekindled my passions in poetry and art, focused on my academics and ended with a 4.0 for the sem, found friends who love and care for me and want to see me grow, enjoyed my first semester + got out of my comfort zone, and currently am romantically involved with someone who means so much to me! it’s been a roller coaster in getting to where i am today and i know i have so much more to work on but i’m so, so, so proud of myself. i also found myself a found family in one of my hs teachers. him and his wife figuratively took me in and care for me as if i am really their child, and i am so incredibly grateful to them for all that they’ve done to support me.

actually, the day i’m sending in this ask is the day before i move back into the dorms! i’ve been home for winter break. it’s been a lil rough again but i am excited to get back to the dorms (less excited for the actual classes…) and see everyone. i start classes monday!

so yeah, that’s about it for me!! i’m not really into haikyuu anymore or even genshin—i still think about the characters from time to time (iwaizumi hajime 27 personal athletic trainer yeahyahyeahyeahyeah) but it’s nothing too serious :P i played honkai star rail for awhile!! however once college started i haven’t really had any time to invest in those kinds to time-consuming games where you have to grind D: but i still do love all the character designs and am actually studying to hopefully be apart of the game design process one day!! so !!! WOOP WOOP !!!

OKAY THATS ACTUALLLYYY IT i swear !! hopefully we will be able to catch up again soon—it’s always nice knowing that the people you crossed paths with in life are doing well :3 thank you so much for everything once again! until next time, darling ames <3

- your lovely 🧸 :)

Okay well, uh, this is like 5 months later ASDJFLKADSJKLDASFALSKDJ I would be totally down to exchange discord if you're comfy! but up to you! I will be trying to check more <3

AWWWW thank you so much jules ;u; that's so sweet of you. Life is so strange as we get older... I know it's just going to get weirder and weirder. A lot like Haikyuu, even when reaching the end of a journey, not only do you feel a bit empty but also... relieved? Because you did it!! But also, the journey, even hard, was fun. I sure miss my friends because a lof of us have big adult jobs now so it's hard to call and text--you're always a bit exhausted at the end of the day. Watching Battle of the Garbage dump really hit me in the feels LMAOOOO. The match was fun for them but they didn't want it to end but in order for it to BE fun was because they knew it had to come to an end TT_TT

Heheh thanks!! I find that a lot of the characters I simp for all have bits and pieces of him so :3

Also, hey, that shit sounds real hard man. Thank you for sharing all of that with me, I hope that in the past 5 months it hasn't been to crazy and you've been enjoying your first year of college! I hope you've found a good therapist and I hope, no I know, you will find friends who will stick with you through thick and thin. And whoever your partner is is lucky to be with you. Honestly, I don't really, and haven't really, have a friend group anymore. Maybe it's because America has the lack of a third place, the lack of walkable cities except during university (if you lived on campus), and a bunch of other things. But we gotta work with what we got and sometimes just having different friends in different parts of your life is okay, you don't always need to bring them all together for that "friend group" because it's just not always like that. And I spend time with my boyfriend's kinda friend group (more like a discord server where anyone who joins will join and it's the same people who do) and yeah I know them and they know me but I also know they would not be good REAL friends. LMAO.

I'm glad you're doing so much better! Therapy is so good and helpful and also props to you for getting a 4.0... that shits hard. And I hope you're enjoying the time with the person you're romantically involved with! heheh. Also that's so sweet of your former HS teacher! Goals, honestly. (On that note, I have a contracted teaching job as a physics HS teacher now WAHOOOOO, I long term-subbed an English class for all of second semester and that shit was hard cus these kids had two teachers quit on them and multiple long term subs lmao so they were pretty disheartened until i stuck it out)

I hope you enjoyed your second semester in the dorms!!!

I get like random spurts of haikyuu obsession... and then it's off. I actually got back into genshin now! LMAO I started playing the main quest, and it just got me hooked. Since it's summer and I already have a job set out I've been relaxing tbh so I started playing again since I got bored... Trying to work out though cus I have no muscle and I should take care of my body LMAOOO

Also valid! I feel like I would try to play games and shit during school as a student but there was always so much to do. Now, I have so much free time heheh.

I WOULD LOVE TO SEE YOUR WORK WHEN YOU GO INTO GAME DESIGN OMGGGGG, imagine i play one of your games in the future...

Yes! I totally get it, I'm glad you're doing well, I hope you've been doing well as well ;u;