#that quotes that says art should find you

[covenofthearticulate]

hiii idk if you’ve ever discussed this before but i’ve been thinking about louis and marius interacting all day and so i’d LOVE to hear your take on what you think their dynamic would be like! what do you think it would take to get louis to engage with him on a more intimate level?

NO KENZIE YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH I ADORE MARIUS AND LOUIS!!!!!

literally all my favorite quotes about Louis in canon come from that little bit in QOTD from Marius' POV! Like!!! I will never get over how IMMEDIATELY smitten they are with each other!!!

Like on the one hand we have: "Louis stood quite still looking at [Marius] as he had earlier, as though he were seeing a myth made real."

and then we see that the feeling is absolutely mutual with Marius: "He smiled at Louis. Something in the manner of this one made Marius happy, though he wasn't sure why."

I think their dynamic is just so especially interesting because they have so many connecting threads re: Lestat and Armand, so up until QOTD they really have this mythologized version of one another— to Louis, Marius is this grand figure with all the answers Louis had always been searching for, and someone who both deeply loved and deeply hurt some of Louis' closest companions. For Marius, Louis is this strange fledgling who had the audacity to expose these secrets he's kept hidden at his own expense for literal centuries. By all accounts there should be some tension there, or at the very least some awkwardness!

But just as Armand and Louis are sort of two sides of the same coin in a lot of ways, I think Louis is one of the only vampires who has an innate understanding of Marius' worldview. Louis is not the artist or philosopher or politician that Marius is, but he holds a lot of the same values. I mean— Louis is a textbook Libra for god's sake— he NEEDS order and balance in his life, and lord knows Marius is the only other person who prioritizes that as well!

So anyway this is all to say that I really don't think it would take much for Louis to want to engage with Marius on a more intimate level!

And like, I was talking to a friend about this the other day as well but I'd like to think that in their contemporary era, Louis could really be the pupil that Marius needs. Yes, Daniel's relationship with Marius is bittersweet and interesting and fun to play with, but I've always wanted to see who Marius is outside of being a caretaker, and I think Louis is just like the perfect middle ground where he doesn't need or want anyone doting on him or worrying over him, but he's still coming into his own in the new era, he's still finding himself, he needs a kind hand, someone to talk with about books and music and art and culture.

And on Marius' end, I think it would do him good to spend time with someone who is just so genuine. As much as Marius needs and wants his pupils to challenge him, I think he would really benefit from having someone who is willing to just listen and appreciate his philosophy (that's not to say that he and Louis wouldn't have disagreements— but even then I'm sure they hash it out Socratic Style and end up with enough intellectual stimulation to get them all giddy).

ANYWAY TL;DR: WE NEED MORE MARIUS & LOUIS CONTENT PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD

[onlyasgoodasitgets]

IVE BEEN TRYING TO FIND THE NAME OF THIS BOOK FOR MONTHS

i could remember the synopsis, the cover art, the name of one (1) character, but NOT the author or title and i find it on the shelf of a literary arts cafe by chance

i read this over a decade ago on my first gen nook!!! i’m so excited

[crossbackpoke-check]

it’s all the rest of what i want with you

connor dewar/brandon duhaime :: 8k

Summary:

“Brandon,” Connor says with a sigh. “There’s no baby in there.”

“Not yet,” Brandon says. Connor feels his stomach twist, almost like what he would imagine a baby kicking to feel like.

in these trying times of dewvorce, may i offer you 8k of pwp inspired by @stillfertile’s wonderful art which i had. several breakdowns about 🫶 anyway please enjoy!!!

[frociaggine]

@moscca you're right and you should say it! Here's a really great compilation of Taz quotes I've been keeping in mind

From an interview where she says that Lovecraft was one of her main inspirations, talks about her relationship with horror vs. sff as a genre author, and wanting to find relatable heroines in horror lit.

I didn’t write Gideon the Ninth for the characters—I wrote it entirely for the structure. I wanted to tell a very specific story, and I needed everything to serve that story.

I want people to realise there are no boundaries. I also want to release people from having to take their universe entirely seriously, if they don’t want to. Science fiction and fantasy reflects ourselves, our anxieties, our joys. I’m just writing to amuse myself, as per usual.

I am writing for my younger self and it would be disgusting of me to try to teach her anything.

(& other quotes from that same interview)

Although love and forgiveness aren’t necessarily the same thing either, Gideon’s frankly divine ability to forgive is a huge core of the novel. [...] Forgiveness is almost the electrical current being able to transmit through love.

The way I personally stay true to the story I started down on is to give myself permission to not teach anyone anything. [...] I know that a lot of people do take enormous pleasure and relief in lines or phrases or ideas from stories that ring true to their own lives, but it’s important for me that I tell a story and that I’m not writing Chicken Soup for the Necromantic Soul.

...the God of the Locked Tomb IS a man; he IS the Father and the Teacher; it’s an inherently masc role played by someone who has an uneasy relationship himself to playing a Biblical patriarch. John falls back on hierarchies and roles because they’re familiar even when he’s struggling not to. But the divine in the Locked Tomb is essentially feminine on multiple axes.

It seems to me that most books by anyone female-adjacent have an expectation that they will comfort the uncomfortable and discomfit the comfortable etc., whereas a guy can just tell an adventure story and be done with it. This ties in with an idea that I think nowadays that good art is moral and bad art is immoral: i.e. if a story is good it must somehow be beautiful on the moral scale. We go looking for why the art we love is moral even if the art we love is a donut.

[pinguwrites]

To Lend a Hand | Thomas Shelby

Pairing -> thomas shelby x sister!reader

Summary -> After catching your brother masturbating, you decide to go to him for help in a matter you've been struggling with—the art of pleasure, and specifically, how to do it for yourself.

Word count: 3.2k

Warnings: smut (minors dni), a little dark!!! bc dub-con near the end, age-gap (not specified, but reader's in her early twenties and tommy late twenties/early thirties), fingering, incest (half siblings so reader doesn't have to be white/reader's implied to not be fully white), masturbating, oral sex f receiving, fingering, mention of lizzie perverted!tommy, spanking/slapping pussy, tommy's lowkey condescending, use of sir

Disclaimer: Peaky Blinders characters, plots, quotes, etc. do not belong to me and belong to the rightful owner(s). This is only fanfiction and this is just for fun.

Thomas Shelby wasn't sure how it happened. He hadn't meant to fall for his younger sister, not when you were so young and innocent and filled with potential, but things happened, and, as he reasoned with himself, so did love. He didn't choose it, nor could he stop it, no matter how hard he tried, no matter how hard he tried to push down his desires. He would find himself touching your shoulder whenever he could, siding with you whenever you argued with the other siblings, and even taking the blame for you when you got in trouble. He knew he could never have you in the way he wanted. You were a forbidden fruit, an apple he could never take a bite out of.

He always thought it was cruel. You were right there, right in front of him, but just out of his reach. Your laughter made him smile on even the darkest days, your touch made him warm in the coldest nights, and when he was alone and scared and vulnerable, all he had to do was come into your room and curl up in your arms as you held and comforted him to sleep.

He tried to drown his feelings with sex. Partially as a distraction from you. He wanted to guide his attraction to other women, if possible, though he also just enjoyed fucking and the pleasure that came with his cock buried deep inside of a hole.

But sometimes it wasn’t enough. Sometimes, while he had whores on all fours, he would still think of you, of his beautiful little sister, and how it would feel to fuck you, to marry you, to love you in all the ways he wanted to.

Tommy made sure no one was nearby before he sat down on his bed and pulled out his cock. It was a big thing, a fact he was proud of. Long and thick, and it always got hard fast. He just knew you would like it, if only he could show it to you.

He spit on his hands and started pumping his length, his chest rising and falling. His breaths came out in shallow gasps as he increased the speed of his movements, imagining his hands as yours. You would be on your knees, looking up at him through fluttering eyelashes, teasing him no other woman could.

This wasn’t a rare occurrence. He wanked a lot, like most men did. When he was in the military, as a teenager wet behind the ears, and especially now, though a lot had changed from each of those periods in his life.

He felt like he was just getting worse and worse. Like a rusting car. He was an awful person, he couldn’t deny that, but he didn’t want to be an awful brother to you.

He caught a glimpse of himself in his mirror, the small one on his dresser, but he looked away. A part of him was ashamed. All you needed was someone to look up to, yet here he was, coming at the thought of you.

"Fuck!"

Tommy froze and turned his head, only to see you, the devil herself, at the door, eyes wide and stuck on the scene at the bed.

It was like time had frozen. Tommy’s hand was still on his cock, but he wasn’t moving. He was looking at you, and you were looking at him �� or more so, his body.

But before Tommy could say anything you shut the door. He could hear the sound of your footsteps as you hurried away.

Shit, he thought. Shit! He should have made sure the door was locked. What was he thinking? Had he just ruined things between you and him? He knew you were aware of his lustful activities, but to see it in person . . .

He sighed. The mood was ruined. He put his cock back in his pants and got up to wash his hands. He was going to have to talk to you about, make sure everything was okay.

It was not a conversation he was looking forward to.

+++

“Tommy?”

Tommy recognized your voice, and the gentle knocking of your knuckles. He was in his office, just finished arranging a meeting via his secretary, when you stopped by.

He hadn’t gotten a chance to talk to you yet. This was the perfect time.

“Come in, sweetheart.”

He always called you that, despite what his Aunt Polly and Ada thought. Ada used to be jealous that he never gave her such an endearing nickname, though she quickly got over that as she aged, and Aunt Polly, well, she thought it was inappropriate, but in her desperation to hope nothing was going on, she eventually ignored it and chalked it up to sibling affection.

Arthur and John never really cared. They always thought he was being soft on you, and while there was the occasional teasing, nothing major ever came out of those talks.

You walked in, looking down. Your face was filled with conflict and indecisiveness, as if you were hesitating to tell him something.

“Listen,” Tommy said. “I’m sorry you saw that. A girl like you has no business—”

“It’s not about that,” you blurted, playing with the hem of your dress. You never did that unless you were nervous.

You sat down on one of the couches near his desk, finally meeting his eyes.

“I just . . . I have an odd request.”

Tommy raised an eyebrow. “Odd request, eh?” You didn’t say anything, unsure of how to continue. “Well, don’t keep me in the dark. Tell me what it is that has got you all flustered like a silly school girl.”

You huffed at the comment and paused, then decided to just go through with it. Tommy wouldn’t judge you, would he? He never did in the past.

“I’ve been with men. A few times. Sex and all that,” you started, trying to be as brave as you could.

Tommy did not like hearing that. He knew you had partners. He warded off as many suitors as he could, but you were sneaky, and found ways to slip through his restrictions. The thought of you fucking someone else made his heart thump with silent anger, however hypocritical it was. Both because he wanted to protect you, and also because he wanted it to be him you were with.

“Go on.”

“But they’ve never . . . you know.” You made a confusing motion with your hands. “Look, you promise that if you don’t like where this is heading, you tell me to stop and leave? And we never bring this up again?”

“I don’t want you to stop.” But seeing the look on your face made him nod. “I promise.”

“They’ve never.” You wrung your hands awkwardly. “Made me come,” you finally said.

Tommy didn’t give any indication, nor expression that showed he was surprised, but he was. Out of all the things he was expecting you to say, this was not one of them.

“And what has that got to do with me?”

He hated how harsh he was being, but he felt like he was going to break at any moment. Break this facade, carry you in his arms, and pleasure you himself.

It was just more proof that these other men didn’t deserve you. They couldn’t even give you an orgasm.

“I just — you know, I was wondering, how much do you know about women? I know you see Lizzie and your other whores, and I know you do it for your own pleasure, but do you know how to . . .” you trailed off.

“I’ve made women come, yes,” he answered. “Many times.”

“Could you . . .” You took a deep breath. “Could you show me how?”

This time, Tommy did have a reaction, a very visible one. A faint blush dusted his cheeks, though he tried very hard to keep that from showing.

“Sweetheart,” he said slowly, trying to keep his voice steady. “I’m sure you can do that on your own.”

“But I can’t,” you said, getting bolder by the second. “I’ve tried, and I just can’t. And, well, you know how to — and —and you’re the only one I trust!”

You were seriously regretting this.

“I’m sorry,” you added quickly, getting up from your seat. “I’m sorry, Tommy. Please don’t be mad. Let’s just forget about this and move on—”

But Tommy stood up as well, and grabbed your wrist. “No.”

You stood there, scared. He wasn’t going to yell at you, was he? Even worse, what if he told Polly? You were done for, this was all over. It was going to be so miserable during family meetings and Christmas dinners and —

Tommy tilted your chin up. “You want me to touch you, is that it? You want your big brother to pleasure you?”

You nodded, rubbing your legs together.

How could he say no? How could he say no when you were asking him so politely? It was his job after all, no? To teach you things? And he would be damned if he let another man do it for you first. It was his responsibility. His opportunity.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, Tommy.”

He tapped your cheek twice. “Good. But if I’m going to do this for you, we need to have some rules, alright?

“One: you don’t tell anyone. No family, no friends, no strangers. Got it?”

“Yes, Tommy,” you said, biting your lip, something that made him loose his focus for a moment.

“Two: you listen to me. No saying ‘stop’, no disobeying my orders. You said it yourself, you don’t know how to do it. I’m the experienced one. You trust me and take it. Is that clear?”

“Yes, sir.”

Tommy’s eyes darkened in lust. “Go to your room and lock the door. Wait for me.”

Feeling a rush of excitement flush your body, you grinned and ran off to do as he said.

A while later, you heard his voice and welcomed him in, making sure to lock the door behind you guys this time. You didn’t want someone else to share the incident you had earlier today. That would be absolutely mortifying.

You expected him to go easy on you, to take things slow, but was shocked when he pushed you onto his bed, held your legs up, and pulled down your skirt.

Now, you were only in your panties, trying to cover your thighs. “Tommy!” you squeaked, feeling shy all of a sudden, even though this was your idea.

“Legs up,” he ordered.

You stayed still. “It’s okay if you can’t make me, you know.”

“I will,” he responded arrogantly. “Now, are you going to do as I say?”

You instinctively closed your legs together. This was more embarrassing than you anticipated. You were wet and horny, but still.

He crawled on top of you, cupping your face in his hands. His lips were inches from yours, and all you wanted to do was reach up and kiss him.

“I know you’re scared, but you asked for this, sweetheart.” He brushed the hair out of your face. “I won’t hurt you. All I want to do is make you feel good. Will you let me to do that? Will you let your big brother take care of you?”

His words were enough to convince you. You slowly took your panties off, an agonizing pace for Tommy. But the moment you tossed them to the side of the room you closed your legs again.

“I don’t know if you’ll like it . . .” There were so many things you hadn’t thought of. You were grateful he was willing to help you, but what if it all went wrong? What if he thought you were disgusting and left? What if he made fun of you?

No. Tommy wouldn’t do that, you told yourself. Stop doubting him.

Tommy gave you an incredulous look. “Like what? Your cunt? Oh, sweet girl. I already love it.”

He placed a pillow under your lips and settled you down properly, finding a comfortable position for both you and him.

“You’re tense.” He ran a hand up through thigh, making you shudder. “Relax.”

You shut your eyes, arms above your head. You couldn’t believe this was actually happening. Your wildest fantasies were finally coming true.

Tommy pried your legs open, and after a few moments, you felt him kiss your clit, gently, but firm, murmuring with that sincerity he reserved for only a few, “Beautiful.”

Your eyes flew open and you looked down, seeing Tommy between your legs. You immediately went to run your fingers through his dark brown hair. No man had ever gone down on you before. You thought Tommy would just finger you and get on with it, but here he was, about to eat you out.

“Relax,” he repeated, hand still running up and down your thigh.

You closed your eyes.

He kissed your cunt again, but a little lower this time. “Beautiful.”

Did he realize how flustered he was making you?

Another kiss, lower. “Beautiful.” Another one. “Beautiful.”

He started sucking, delicately on your clit, looking up at you through fluttering eyelashes as he observed your reactions, but just in a few moments, after he briefly sweeped his tongue over, he lightly bit down and increased the intensity. 

You moved your hips up and down, squirming. You had never felt like this before. You had tried fingers and pillows and objects but none of that compared to Tommy’s mouth on you. He was like magic. 

Your continued running your fingers through his hair. You loved playing with it. Sometimes, you wished Tommy would grow it out longer.

“Put your hands here,” Tommy said in between kisses. “I want to hold them.”

He placed your hands down in a straight line, so he could interlock his fingers with yours as he ate you out. It felt oddly romantic. Like there was no one else in this moment but you and him, him and you, together in an act of pleasure.

You squeezed Tommy’s palm, struggling to keep yourself still. You didn’t want to accidentaly buck your hips up into his face, or squiggle away from him, but you were finding it increasingly difficult not to.

Tommy didn’t seem to mind. He just rode you through your movements, nose brushing up against your cunt. He was making obnoxious sucking sounds, like puckering, which made you try and hide your face by turning your head to the side.

He pulled away, making you whine in disappointment, but then he slapped your cunt and you yelped at the stinging, still nice sensation.

“Tommy!” 

He did it again, harder, with a grin on his face. “Like that?”

“No-o,” you lied.

That didn’t stop him. He left a few more slaps to your body, revelling in your reactions, but before you could close your legs, he pulled them apart and plunged a finger inside your hole, vigorously rubbing up against that swollen spot inside of you.

You moaned, arching your back. “Tommy.”

“Such a sweet girl, eh?” he praised. “My sweet girl. Can’t believe you’ve never cum before. I’ll be your first.”

Tommy was more interested in giving you your first orgasm than claiming your virginity. The idea that it was him, not you, or any other man, that could make you feel this good, that was the only one that could make you feel this good, inflated his ego.

His fingering was rough. You tried to take note of how he did it, curling his fingers inside of you, but it was difficult to focus, and before long, you felt something unfamiliar come rushing through your body, and with a jump of your heart, you realized what it was.

With a cry, you came onto his fingers, feeling a little dizzy for a moment. It wasn’t necessarily as mind-blowing as portrayed in those romance books you always read, but it certainty felt amazing, like if you could do it all day, you would, just in your room, groaning and sighing, nothing but you and yourself.

But Tommy didn’t stop.

You looked down, eyes wide, as Tommy continued to pump in and out of you, his breath labored, but his pace even faster and rougher, to the point where you felt like your mind was jumbling up.

It felt good. Too good. Too much for you to handle.

“Enough,” you tried to say, throwing your head back onto the pillow. “I came, s’enough.”

“No,” Tommy growled. “I know what I’m doing.”

“It hurts a little,” you mewled, grabbing onto his arm. You tried to pull him out, but you were too weak, and your efforts were futile. “Please.”

“I told you no saying ‘stop’, didn’t I?” He kept rubbing up against that spot, not caring for your protests. “I’m not gonna hurt you, sweetheart. Trust me. You don’t know anything.”

You took in his words. You were overwhelmed, but you knew Tommy was right. He did know better, he always knew better.

Eventually, you could feel another orgasm coming. This time, when you came, Tommy stopped, and watched as the white juice poured out of you. He licked it up, and for a moment you were scared he was going to start all over again, but he just licked the cream off his fingers, and gave you a kiss to the forehead.

You looked down. His cock was hard. You could see it buldging through his pants. After catching your breath, you reached forward to unzip it, but Tommy didn’t let you.

“Why not?” you asked, curious.

“This isn’t about me. It’s about you.”

Oh, how Tommy wanted to let you play with it, but it wasn’t right. He couldn’t take advantage of you like that.

He had done his work, and now it was time to leave.

He cleaned you up and got off your bed, only for you to follow him.

“Can we do this again?” you asked desperately. “I like being with you.”

Tommy thought for a moment. It wouldn’t hurt. He could see himself making a habit out of it. He was only concerned about his family, what they would think, and what would happen between you and him if things went wrong.

He wanted you as a lover, but he didn’t want to loose you as his sister either.

“Yeah. When you need it, come to me. No one else, you understand?”

You nodded, smiling excitedly. He felt a little bad. You were so young. You were confusing your sisterly affection for romance, and here he was, using it as an opportunity for his own desires.

“Remember,” Tommy said, his voice low. “Don’t tell anyone.”

“I won’t ever,” you promised.

He lingered for a moment, then left the room, creeping back down the stairs to his office, leaving you inside. 

It was difficult to get any work done after that. All he could think about was you, and the future of your love. He wasn’t sure what was to come, but all he knew was that he was glad it was with you.

Taglist:

@henrywintersdearestgirl

@shroombloom-rry

@meetmeatyourworst

@mrkdvidal1989

@smailaway

[menuliso]

i actually think i have some sort of brain damage from chapter 403 because now ive taken my bkdk obsession to a whole new degree. like, i was insane before, but now i feel as if i should be genuinely put into an asylum.

ive gone through a full on awakening.

before this chapter i refused to believe that bkdk would become canon/hinted bc like its wishful thinking. but now? ive fallen into the fucking deep end. i am of full belief that bkdk will become canon or at least be hinted bc horikoshi is cooking something and im so glad im not the only one to see it.

there is no way that man doesnt know what hes doing. bkdks entire arc has been fucking perfect and this man just keeps BUILDING UP. like all this talk about feelings, and how bkdk have never really spoken about them to eachother before??? this is like, building up to a fucking love confession i swear, because katsuki DIED for izuku, and izuku cant control his heart when it comes to katsuki, and like… what other explaination is there? atp i consider it canon that theyre in love with each other.

and the other most likely ship that i thought was gonna be canon, izuocha, just is not feasible. its not like i dislike the ship, no hate to it at all, but making it canon would be so fucking harmful to izuku and ochakos characters and we dont talk about that enough. it would a dissapointing, flat conclusion with barely any build up and itd be the bland, predictable formula. like, ochako has already basically wrapped up her thing with izuku with that entire fight with toga. shes admitted herself that her crush on izuku was more admiration than anything of massive substance. and dont even get me started on izuku. barring some fluster and embarrassed blushing in the early seasons, this boy has NOT reciprocated AT ALL. its actually ridiculous. izuku has been focused on like, two things only: hero work, and kacchan. izuku does not show ANY romantic feeling to ochako whatsoever.

surely, surely if horikoshi were to make this canon, he’d put in a little more effort? add some more chemistry, more development, more than just ‘boy meets girl. blush and get shy. little crush. get married. the end’?

that is bad storytelling, and horikoshi is anything but a bad storyteller. this guy adds foreshadowing YEARS before the chapter. horikoshi is INSANE when it comes to character + relationship + plot development. if horikoshi throws all that out the way, and makes izuocha canon, id be extremely, extremely disappointed. not because i hate the ship, but because itd be out of nowhere, disregard practically ALL development, and be nauseatingly dissatisfying.

talking of which, for the entire day ive been thinking about the foreshadowing for bkdk.

there. is. so. fucking. much. it feels like everytime i read like a new section of the manga, their relationship is described in the most frutti tutti rainbow gay way. im sorry, shigafo, did you just say that katsuki is closer to izuku than ANYONE else? excuse me, aizawa, did you just describe them as pair, a pair that the class revolves around? dont even mention the shit that izuku and katsuki say referring to each other. i cant even choose one to add in here, but every out of context bkdk quote has like these SEVERE more-than-platonic undertones, especially when you consider their past and their development. i feel like horikoshi has been doing some fucking insane foreshadowing for something MORE.

yk, i keep on thinking about how in the double spread in 403, the words ‘the beginning’ are displayed right over bkdk, as they find each other. call me delusional, but that has to be on purpose. i also keep on thinking about izukus green and orange gloves in so many official arts, and the light in both their eyes when they see each other, and the way theyre both always observing the other, never speaking about how they feel directly.

their relationship is just so, so……. and i feel like the only next step is for them to talk. just. fucking. talk. its been hinted at for so long, and horikoshi is doing SOMETHING.

them simply being together would be the most satisfying, developed, beautiful ending.

if they arent canon, i will die. ill say it now. bkdk canon. there is too much proof. as a writer, i know for a fact that i write everything for a REASON. why would horikoshi write this, if he wasn’t going to do anything with it?

bkdk will be canon. i dont care if i sound insane, or get proved entirely wrong. i now fully believe that the last page of the manga will be bkdk at a theme park eating crepes.

thank you chapter 403 for driving me off the rails.

[music-orthemisery]

Pre-Folie Release Madness of (p)2- A Timeline

After spending a few days in cuckoo bananas world thanks to the video re: Patrick's best man speech, @grandtreeangel and I have some things to slide across the table.

Between October 19, 2008 and November 7th, 2008, FOB played a series of shows leading up to the release of Folie a Deux. Each show featured a Pete/Patrick banter moment that, when put together, creates a very...interesting narrative.

October 19th - Birmingham, England show

Pete making a Top Gun reference to the $20 bar bet scene while Patrick plays the Top Gun theme song.

The scene in question: "Total carnal knowledge...of a woman this time, on the premises"

October 22nd - London, England show

First live performance of Patrick's "Love Lockdown" cover

Please see @grandtreeangel’s post HERE for more context on this totally normal thing Patrick did.

October 25th - Lille, France show

OG "my little cabbage" moment Pete, in French, says to Patrick, "You are beautiful, my little cabbage."

October 27th OR 28th - Blog post

Pete posts this on his Tumblr . It says 10/27, but there's some disagreement on time zones so it may be 10/28. EITHER WAY...

Originally, this linked to a clip from the movie Love, Actually. In this scene, a man confesses his love to a woman who is married to his best friend.

There's plenty of debate about this movie, scene, and storyline in general, but we aren't here for that right now!!!

Let's just focus on the facts:

Woman. Married. To BEST FRIEND.

The man was the best man AND the videographer at the wedding.

This whole moment is done secretly. He confesses, they kiss, she goes back inside and tells her husband it was just some carolers.

In general, this whole story arc is ripe with longing and unattainable love due to a marriage keeping the man from being with the woman.

I...wonder what this sounds like...

October 28th - Toronto, Canada show

Love Lockdown cover where Patrick says, "That's for you, Pete."

Again, Patrick being very normal!!!

October 29th - Blog Post

Pete contributes an entry to Bill's "Mondayeyes" poetry club on friendsorenemies.com:

Credit to @alphadog's post for this HERE

The entire poem is quite impactful, but a few lines of interest:

"Where do you get off?" or more like "how"

and...

"You chose this"

When Pete uses quotes, it's noted that this indicates things that have been said to him.

There are scents and spells that keep us coming together, there are sparks that keep us forever

The art of keeping up disappearances

Also, big hello to some Rat-A-Tat lyrics

Whenever I could make the sweat roll backwards and your pulse stream in reverse

(Big thank you to @dykeandyhurley for sending this to me)

November 6th - Boston, MA show

Pete shares the story about Patrick's best man speech.

Huge props to @predoom for finding this moment!

If you haven't seen Top Gun (?!), the context here is very important:

The line "Ice, fire, or clear," is said in the scene where Goose dies.

Scene: "Ice, Fire or Clear!"

Also, it should be noted that, to Pete, he is Goose and Patrick is Maverick.

The fact that Patrick picks this quote to say to Pete...in his best man speech...at PETE'S WEDDING. A quote said when Maverick LOSES Goose.

AND...apparently no one else in the reception quite...get's it. Pete is the only one who does. That line was just for Pete. From Patrick.

Of all the lines in that movie, he picks that one, from that moment.

Then, of course...

We have "The Kids Aren't Alright."

Featuring the lyrics:

Stuck in the jet wash Bad trip I couldn't get off And maybe I bit off more than I could chew And overhead of the aqua blue

Along with Pete's annotation:

November 7th - Philadelphia, PA show

Patrick sings Lullabye.

Take a peek at this post for all of that mess.

"Well, Bronx was about to be born!"

Sure, sure. I'm not DENYING the relevance there. Just. Go look at the post, damn it. Trust me.

And then...?

Nothing. They take a break, Bronx is born, and then they play a show in Columbus, OH on December 1, 2008. This whole little back and forth ends. Folie a Deux is released on December 10th and...well...we all know what happens after that.

[hiael]

Obey Me! Headcanons that the voices in my head created

The pact marks don't affect the MC in general, but when they are used, the color of the user's eyes tends to change to the color of sin (when Solomon sees the color of his eyes changing to the colors of his brothers, geez, jealousy boy), it happens more often than you think and in addition to the marks on the body, it's a reminder to everyone that you're connected with the lords of hell.

Human beings can speak very quickly and neither demons nor angels can keep up when this happens. Scientifically, we talk fast because of anxiety, nervousness, excitement or the communication conditions that the environment provides. Solomon and MC talking about something they thought was cool during the tea? For the others it becomes a RAP battle and all they can hear is "hum, nah, ha, hehe", the rest is indecipherable. More than once, during a presentation or debate in class, MC was told to shut the fuck up or slow down so that everyone could understand.

All material related to the history of the human world is more or less 100 to 200 years out of date in the library. Satan is slowly trying to update this, but they think that 200 years is almost nothing for humans to change, so unlike technology (which they think they created with magic) they just don't care. A new iPhone ok, now the human being landed on the moon during a bloodless war? Their lie, do you still believe what mortals say?

Humans sleep more than angels and demons, but even less than demons from the circle of laziness. MC, Solomon and Belphie (and sometimes Luke) usually sleep in some places at RAD during and between classes.

All exchange students have their own fan club. Luke's must be the quietest, everyone friendly and kind so as not to disappoint the little angel. Did you see him walking past you today, sad that he hadn't managed to buy a keyring at the RAD art fair? Bitch surprise, his fan club are still demons, the keyring will mysteriously appear on his desk in the classroom written "To Luke, a little big ray of sunshine in our lives" and the person who bought it has left the RAD, anyone know why?

Still on the subject of fan clubs, we're not talking about Solomon's. If the number of demons he has a pact with isn't enough of a warning, there are others walking around in capes and blouses as if they were cosplayers and sending letters to his house with phrases like 'roses are red, violets are blue, can we make a pact? Signed: Demon X' should be a better warning

And to end the fan clubs, MC's are trained in the art of being meticulous, a silent army that lives in the shadows - meaning they are in the devildom version of twitter. Lots of photos taken on the sly, fanart of all kinds, fanfics, merchandise and videos edits of (and when were they sheep? There are millions and millions of images circulating out there). Ever wondered why Miss Em sold so much? The MC fandom. They won't compete with anyone for their attention, the sweet human is simply appreciated the way they are (and they don't want to be on the brothers' list to "get away from the MC"). The Human Appreciation Club was not approved by the student council and they removed their devilpedia page, but that didn't erase these demons desire to idolize MCs. Live, love and laugh for MC, the way simps are.

At some point, the Real or Cake trend went crazy until Luke, who started making desserts that looked like everyday things, only stopped after surprising Simeon by cutting a cell phone-shaped cake (Simeon tried to break his with his hand after that, thinking it was cake. He spent 3 weeks without a phone)

Every time MC returns from a trip to the human world, they have to bring a suitcase just with souvenirs from there. Luckily, it can be anything they find fun, like a frog-shaped coaster, a jar of M&Ms with a pinwheel on top, a whole corn cake, a tie with a motivational quote, a children's book, or a coin of a specific year. Everyone just loves the fact that MC was thinking of them and they love using the gift they received. Barbatos's favorite tea set is now a completely transparent one with gold floral details.

Children's cartoons from 1940 still show on Devildom TV and Beel watches while eating or working out.

Lucifer has a family photo inside his wallet, Mammon once tried to steal his credit card, he was so shocked that he ended up screaming, he was caught and punish. Neither of them mention the photo.

[misserabella]

okay hear me out abby x tattoo artist reader!!

okay hear me out 🩷 (so much fluff!!)

tattoo love

abby anderson x fem! reader

abby who is just starting to get her tattoos years after finally getting into medicine. (she’s become a re known surgeon and so her skills finally being recognized, she doesn’t need to keep ‘images’, so after years of suffering and hard work she finally gets her first tattoo appointment’)

abby who, mindlessly scrolling though instagram, finds your account and falls in love with how beautiful you tattoo and decides that if she’s going to get a tattoo her first should be yours.

abby the pretty girl that hits you up with a ‘hey! i just wanted to say that i really love your art and was wondering if i could book an appointment with you! :)’

abby who smiles widely when you hit her back with a ‘sure! what are you looking for? :)’

abby who sends you pictures of little tattoos that her friend ellie had made for her and quotes that she loves with which she would like to do a sleeve. minimalistic, all black and white and small. she even had one for her mother, who had sadly passed away years prior.

abby who blushes when you tell her that the artwork is beautiful and that she’s really brave to go all in due to this being her first time being tattooed.

abby the nervous wreck who keeps spacing out during work due to how excited she is.

abby the tall pretty blonde that sits on your waiting area for you to finish your prior appointment to go inside.

abby the intelligent surgeon who flushes when she sees you, all smiles and pretty with skin littered in tattoos.

abby the clumsy mess that makes an scene when you call out for her and she quickly sits up, hitting the center table on her way to you and making the magazines on top of it fall to the floor.

abby the apologizing wreck who can’t stop saying sorry as she kneels and starts to pick them up, cheeks, neck and ears going all red when you help her and your hands meet. shit. was she a fucking teenager?

abby, the amazing surgeon that forgets how breathing works when you smile at her. where were the lungs again?

abby, who sits silently, with wide puppy eyes as you explain everything that will happen during then session, show her everything you’ll be using and their function. you were like a surgeon, but for tattoos. and she liked that.

abby, who listens to you as you try and distract her from being nervous as you get everything ready by showing her some of your art and who silently thanks you for doing so.

abby, who realized it doesn’t hurt that bad and joins into a soft easy conversation with you.

abby, who you learn about a lot in that hour and a half —you two had accorded on meeting up the next day to finish up her sleeve—. by the end of the session you know that she’s a general surgeon, that her mother passed very early on her life, that her father is the most important person in her life, that she also has a dog name alice and that she really loves snow drops and lilies.

abby anderson, who can’t wait to meet you again and ends up laying awake all night, ending up slightly dozing off on the second appointment. of course you didn’t tell her, you didn’t mind. she looked so adorable with her pretty blue eyes all droopy in sleep…

abby_anderson, who posts you to her instagram stories once her sleeve is complete and who you end up following that same night ‘cause… maybe you found her too cute for your own good.

abby_anderson, account that you spend eyeing for hours. she seemed to really love hitting the gym, finding time to go every morning early before her shifts. and she was…, hot. her muscles were huge. you found so cute how gentle she was compared to her exterior, all scary and strong. she also posted about books she’d read, and films she’d watch with her friends.

abigail, better known as abby, who hits you up a few days later telling you how happy she is with the result of your work and how she’d love to invite you to a cup of coffee to thank you. you of course said yes.

abby the blushing mess that takes you for a walk on the park, buys you coffee and with who you spend the whole day talking and walking around, going for dinner that same night. also the flushed wreck that asks you if it’d be okay to meet up with you again.

abby, the gentle general surgeon that texts you in between shifts and in her free time and that cups your cheeks and softly kisses you under the stars on your third date.

abby anderson, with who you now lived and with who you’re two years in in the most perfect and beautiful relationship you’ve ever had.

and all because of a tattoo.

-

a/n; so cute :(

[ihaveverything]

Limitless manifesting for beginners

part I - basic concepts

part II - states, techniques, change

ʚ part III - mental diet, sats

part IV - daily life, time

part V - resistance, faith, the ''real'' world

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.

On your journey to success, you may find that manifesting does inevitably come with an art of discipline and persistence. However, this is not to say it’s tiring, draining, difficult, or effort based at all. The discipline comes naturally, and persistence is without resistance. As the creator of your reality, you are met with infinite probable selections. Infinite states you may occupy, therefore leading to infinite possible realities you could experience. Taking responsibility for this and making the decisions that align with the life you wish to live is being, not doing or trying

Mental diet

The process of mental dieting can be quite confusing at first because there is a constant nagging reminder that you are supposed to return to fulfillment as frequently as you can. However, this is not about setting a schedule or reminders throughout the day to try to slip into the state a certain number of times an hour. Even though returning to states should be easy and the goal is to truly embody that new identity as much as you can, it is common for people to get distracted from being, and focus too much on trying.

It’s understandable to experience some good days and some bad days. There will be days when it’s easier to feel optimistic about the Law in general, and days where all you want to do is give up and spiral. The key point here is that positive thinking and optimism isn’t the reason why you can maintain a more stable mental diet. Mental dieting is to help change your beliefs. Each moment you return to the state of the wish fulfilled is to identify with a different probable reality where you are experiencing your desire. It is a choice you are making to feel what it would be like to have your desire. It is not thinking about your desire with little conviction. There is a difference between “okay I have my SP back. did I feel it right?” vs “I accepted the feeling of being back together, therefore I am experiencing aligned thoughts and emotions due to my conviction in knowing this will reflect into my 3D.” Acceptance is always the first step in this equation. Trying to do anything, whether it be forcing the state of the wish fulfilled, forcing the 3D, or using effort based techniques such as robotic affirming are all less efficient than accepting what you want to be true for a moment.

“Stop trying to change the world since it is only the mirror. Man’s attempt to change the world by force is as fruitless as breaking a mirror in the hope of changing his face. Leave the mirror and change your face. Leave the world alone and change your conceptions of yourself. The reflection then will be satisfactory.” ― Neville Goddard, Your Faith is Your Fortune

Additionally, there is no such thing as waiting to feel fulfillment. It’s understandable to have fear or doubt around feeling like you are unable to fulfill yourself whenever you want, but the truth is everyone needs to stop waiting. Make the decision now. Don’t tell yourself you’re gonna go all in tomorrow or next week or after the next motivational video. You occupy a state of awareness every single moment of the day. There is no excuse not to give yourself your desire now, because of the following quote:

“I will be” is a confession that “I am not “ The Father's will is always “I AM.” Until you realize that YOU are the Father (there is only one I AM and your infinite self is that I AM), you will is always “I will be.” ― Neville Goddard, The Power of Awareness

When you are feeling down on days where you’re not so confident about your manifestation skills, it’s at core a reminder that you are still viewing life as someone who is “trying” to obtain a desire that seems separate from you. We have been manifesting and creating our whole lives. Even your personality is based on the beliefs that created your environment starting from when you were born. We often let our mind run on autopilot and allow it to entertain negative possibilities that we expect to unfold even when nothing has been seen in the 3D yet. We place such faith in expecting the worst when it is unseen, but we rarely do the same for the positive best outcome, because society has taught us all about probability, things going wrong, luck, and every other reason which implies there is something or someone outside of ourselves that can control an individual’s reality. Expectation of the negative, whether it be you’ll never get that SP back, they are in love with someone else, you will lose that job, or overall the Law just doesn’t work will often lead to feelings and emotions of fear, lack, anxiety, etc.

“Sensation precedes manifestation and is the foundation upon which all manifestation rests. Be careful of your moods and feelings, for there is an unbroken connection between your feelings and your visible world. Your body is an emotional filter and bears the unmistakable marks of your prevalent emotions. Emotional disturbances, especially suppressed emotions, are the causes of all disease. To feel intensely about a wrong without voicing or expressing that feeling is the beginning of disease – disease – in both body and environment. Do not entertain the feeling of regret or failure for frustration or detachment from your objective results in disease.” ― Neville Goddard, Feeling is the Secret

When manifesting anything, the key to being is knowing how you and your desire are one. Everything already exists within you, and that combined with how creation is finished should be a powerful understanding that brings you to realize there is no such thing as “doing” this or that to make your 3d change. Your awareness of being is enough. By conditioning yourself into an identity / state you become one with it and manifest that state into reality. You, while far more than the state you are one with, have to become it by placing your awareness on it. Doing this is as simple as the decision to be something, you choose to become aware of being that state, and it manifests when it is natural. It should be noted that the time it takes to make something natural is dependent on the frequency, not the length of time, so do not expect months or years to yield results. In fact, such a long time with no success is a blatant mistake that you are either lacking discipline in your mental diet, or a failed approach due to more effort than being.

“The future must become the present in the imagination of the one who would wisely and consciously create circumstances. We must translate vision into Being, thinking of into thinking from. Imagination must center itself in some state and view the world from that state.” ― Neville Goddard, Awakened Imagination

“To move into another state or mansion necessitates a change of beliefs. All that you could ever desire is already present and only waits to be matched by your beliefs. But it must be matched, for that is the necessary condition by which alone it can be activated and objectified. Matching the beliefs of a state is the seeking that finds, the knocking to which it is opened, the asking that receives. Go in and possess the land.” ― Neville Goddard, Awakened Imagination

Everyone has their own choice for what method they prefer to use for manifesting. Some people like affirmations because it feels like a solid statement that helps them feel into the state. Others may choose visualizing since scenes may help them get their imagination running. Ultimately it does not matter what you do as long as you are focusing on the end result while patiently knowing that it will become your reality. We all gained interest in the Law because of what it promises us, but if you aren’t being the promise first, then results won’t come to you no matter how much “effort” you put in. As Yoda once said in Star Wars:

“Do or do not, there’s no try.”

SATS

Your sleeping hours are just as important as your waking hours of life. Your sleep plays a major role in your manifestation, so the last waking state you occupy is crucial. “You must be in the consciousness of being or having that which you want to be or to have before you drop off to sleep. Once asleep, man has no freedom of choice. His entire slumber is dominated by his last waking concept of self.”― Neville Goddard, Feeling is the Secret

A method of aligning your state with the wish fulfilled while you are drowsy is commonly known as SATS. Although SATS is often done right before falling asleep, there is nothing special about the time of day you do this. It is equally effective to do SATS as soon as you wake up or during the day. It is an extremely helpful way to manifest, but it differs from techniques such as affirmations, visualizations, scripting, etc because it’s a state. Affirmations themselves hold no meaning, and the scenes you visualize aren’t what manifests either. State Akin to Sleep refers to the deep state of consciousness during meditation or just before falling asleep. The reason why Neville recommended this method is because your last waking state is what dominates your entire sleep, and it sets the ground for your next day. You will often find that falling asleep in the state of the wish fulfilled vs in a state of lack can be very different for how easy your mental diet is the next day.

There are 2 different ways to go about SATS, but ultimately they both aim to achieve the same goal: making sure your last waking state is aligned with having your desires.

The traditional way is what many people know. Finding a comfy position, visualizing a short 10-15 second scene that implies your manifestation is fulfilled, looping that scene until you fall asleep.

The second way is simpler because some people feel like looping a scene puts too much emphasis on trying to “make it work” or “do it right” instead of focusing on the feeling and being part. There will always be people who don’t enjoy doing that, but because the goal is to fall asleep in the state of the wish fulfilled and not necessarily how perfect your scene is, so an alternate way is to enter that state right before you knock out, and it will be just as effective.

Your SATS scene does not have to be perfect at all. It doesn't matter if you visualize in first person or third person or how you go about this, because your only goal is to focus on the intention you set for your scene. Just like your daily mental diet, knowing and conviction is what brings about your desire. This is also why it's not absolutely necessary to loop the scene and even beat yourself over it not being a perfect cycle.

source tba

[beegalactica]

the power of positive self-talk

The words we speak hold so much power. Our words can enforce our positive self-concept, or drag us into endless spirals of self-doubt. The way we talk to and about ourselves is important more than ever in a world where others' opinions, beliefs and expectations are constantly being forced down our throats.

It is so easy to get stuck in a fixed mindset, where you catastrophise every little inconvenience as if it's the end of the world. You know it's not, but at the moment, it feels like the worst thing to ever happen to you. Here's how to tackle those negative emotions and affirm yourself through the art of positive self-talk:

Rewrite the narrative. You are the author of your own story. Instead of "I don't think I can ever recover from this", tell yourself "I don't know how or when, but I will get through this."

'Fake' it till you make it. I hate this quote generally because I believe that new things will feel foreign and strange at first, but this doesn't mean that it's a fake practice. Do whatever you need to do, to get you to believe, but don't lose sight of yourself. It might seem strange at first, but one day you'll be able to say that you'll be okay and actually believe it so keep moving towards that moment.

Practice the art of consistent practice. Learn to catch yourself when you find yourself growing in negativity. Try to reaffirm yourself, and metaphorically swim back up to the surface. Some days, it will feel like the tides are against you, but catastrophising events in life can lead to a whole host of physical, emotional and mental side effects.

Allow yourself to feel. Positive self-talk should not be misconstrued with toxic positivity. You are allowed to be sad. You are allowed to sit in bed and bawl your eyes out. You are allowed to feel your emotions. You just need to be able to acknowledge how you feel, and still be able to bounce back.

You are your own best friend. If your best friend was having a bad day, would you tell them that they're pathetic and they deserve it, or would you try to show them just how loved they are? If you'd put them down, then you need to rethink what a friend is. If you would try to uplift them, why won't you do this for yourself? Instead of blaming yourself, comfort yourself. Be that friend and tell yourself those words of encouragement that you would give to someone you love and care about.

At the end of the day, you should be someone that you love and care about.

[guardian5tiger3]

Tarot pick a group ....

Anything that comes up.

1. 2. 3.

One

You guys are what people call lovers of life. A lot of you are really into some form or forms of art. A lot of you are really wise, open minded , really psychedelic type of individuals know it or not. You have a fresh way of looking at things a lot of the time and other people may feel that way about you all. You're definitely something a lot of people and really what the world needs . It's like you would be something missing and things would be incomplete without your uniqueness. :)

Oddly I got something about fried food maybe some of you work in a restaurant but really I'm getting the energy that you should treat yourself like you love yourself and fuel yourself with love when it comes to anything you take in and just generally the energy you put yourself in and feel. I'm picking up a really light nice energy. So I'm getting a quote from Alan Watts . Oddly I can't find the quote I'm thinking of .. but I saw one that said " waking up to who you are requires letting go of who you imagine yourself to be. "

I seriously can't find the quote some of you should look into Alan Watts and what he talks about. Generally, though, I'm getting you're searching for something maybe consciously or unconsciously and the universe wants to motivate you to continue to do that and I'm feeling a lot of refreshing energy, so if you open yourself up and allow any energy the universe is trying to gift you that. I heard "a peace of mind" and felt in my third eye really calm. And I see a bird with its wings open now. So there's some information or knowledge or wisdom or something and you will find it just stay on the path that you're on and focus on any good vibes around and within you. Spring time also is looking good for you guys a few of you might be moving also seeing about someone adopting a dog if you thought about that this is saying you should or maybe you already know you're gonna idk. For most of you though look forward to spring I see seeds you planted growing metaphorically which is totally with the season, and good surprises and just really good happy fun light energy. Especially!!! If the winter was kind of rough. Even if you just didn't have fun with the weather if you live where it snows. Or any personal struggles with that being a metaphor for that, I saw a heavy snowstorm, so , yeah. :)

Two

I've been getting a lot of weather symbolism so far and I saw like a rain storm for you all. I also got two cards about conflict, in general. So if you can relate to any tense , irritating energy, anything negative going on this is for you . Even just negative vibes especially with other people or for some living situations even for someone something to do with a kid in your life so it really depends and of course is gonna be specific for everyone what it might be. Seems like you've been trying to stay stable and "hold your own" best you can while also trying to go with the flow in terms of regulating your emotions according to the situation at hand. I just got three nines in a row, 999. That can tell you this is all coming to an end around this time or soon ok. Really picking up queen energy too ..? This is kind of strange but I'm picking up on the energy of treasure like you'll have a surprise or gift or something good from the universe like a present cause of this stuff and just y'all being good people thru this stuff and everything as best you can and being very stable for the circumstances or in general, but I initially got it worded and presented like, treasure. Like pirates or something which is funny cuz I just got a pirate sword tattoo haha. I'm also channeling old cartoons for some reason, like Tom and Jerry specifically, the old ones, like when you were a kid chilling Sunday morning watching the cartoons with your bowl of cereal or whatever. That's a vibe a lot of people share having to be able to experience. I rocked with wacky races and Scooby Doo lol. Among others ..Maybe something you're manifesting now goes all the way back to your childhood, somehow that's a hint. I'm also getting candy and heard sweettooth y'all better be careful with all that or find alternatives so to not damage your teeth ok. And if any of you are eating cuz you're bored ok straight up I heavily got play video games lol. I can relate to that. Also going for walks. Some of you need to drink cold water and make sure you're focusing on hygiene in any way. And for anyone feeling like life is bleak or boring or whatever or unexcited I would say stick to a routine and keep yourself busy for now, things always change no matter what that's a rule of life, and something might come to you one day that's a good idea for something to do, a new adventure, hobby, maybe you volunteer somewhere cool or anything really, it seems like you'll just have an idea eventually.

Three

39, 41,14,13 ,15 all might be significant. Maybe something about math and how math works.....? Wtf... Ok....y'all might talk about the matrix or get references to that. Also a lot about nature especially.... During the day. Also about camping. And ....parks? Depends on who you are. Andddd 16. Right I don't know if this all adds up to something or what I've never been super great at math so... Or maybe something is straight up building up to something ...? Lol. Lot of riddle like energy in this. I got humpty Dumpty . Y'all WTF is this . ? This is so specific and doesn't make a lot of sense to me but what I just channeled was like a group of people or at least two chilling like campfire vibes and sharing something to smoke and just hanging out kinda..... Idk if you want a time like that you can manifest it or some of you already have vibed like that idk. Cuz I saw multiple instances around a campfire and not but mainly at night or in the afternoon ,also sitting on steps outside. I guess you guys in your lives right now it's a lot about synchronicities and ... Going with the flow...? I keep picking up on Dora. The explorer. Anyway y'all seem like ok if your lives are all stories at the end of the day and you're in the middle of your journey but it's like a dope journey ,like embrace whatever adventures you're on and all the obstacles you face cause you have a destiny at the end of it. And by end I don't mean the end end I mean once you meet the ending of this your life will go on, after the happy ending (didn't mean to say happy ending but I added happy. :) . ).... Are you guys just confused in life cause I couldn't tell you what any of this means but hey if it resonates than I guess this is your confirmation youre on the right path.

I'm really picking up that the amount of fun you have at this point in your life at any given moment is mostly up to you. I think there's some points in time in the past and future that are destined to be certain vibes. Like looking at the stars or you have a altercation with someone or whatever you know but , I heard "in the meantime" like, for most of the time you can kind of decide to have fun, make things fun, you're free to do whatever you want. Some of you need to hear and absorb that. You are free. So make the most of that. Whatever you feel in any given moment.

Also , in the meantime is a song by spacehog, me being me I'd say listen to the whole album it has a few of my favorite songs on there personally, but yeah that's a great song so I do personally recommend it , too. Also I heard space song, space, traveler. Maybe I'm picking up on song names and don't know. I know space song is obviously a song but idk about traveler or space so idk. If you know a song like with those words it's significant. For some reason I wanna say, have a good day, lol. I hope this makes sense if it was meant for you. :) . Y'all definitely get a happy ending. So worry less and enjoy the moment it couldn't be more clear to me if you resonate with any of this, you definitely get a happy ending and it'll all be more than ok. Just roll with it. ;) 💗

[cozage]

Hi! Could you write something with Sanji, Zoro, Law (maybe Izo) with a S/O that likes to do graffiti? Like, they have a small ring notebook (idk if it's this, but it's the one that opens and close and u can put more pages) where they keep their small arts, incluiding their name? Pretty pleasee

A/N: I hope I did you justice!! I kept Izo off because I haven’t met him yet (Still in Wano!) but when I get to him I might revisit this and add it!

Characters: gn reader x Sanji, Zoro, Law

Cw: just cute fluff :) 

Total word count: 600

Graffiti on His Heart

Sanji

He finds your notebook by accident. He was cleaning up your room to surprise you, and found your binder in a pile of scattered files

You found him a few hours later, mesmerized by your drawings. You rush over to him, trying to cover it, but you see him staring at some decorated block letters “Sanji + Y/N” with a heart around it. 

There’s other things around it, quotes you’d heard from the crew and things that happened around the ship that you doodled to make cute page accents, and you can see Sanji’s eyes looking at every single thing you drew, his fingers sliding down the page as he looks. 

“You weren’t supposed to find that,” you say, your hands gripping around your notebook. 

“What?” his eyes are still on your pages even as you take them away. He looks up at you, and it’s like he just realized you were there. 

“Oh, Y/N!” He blushes hard when he realizes he's been caught snooping. “You never mentioned being an artist! This work is magnificent!”

“I dabble sometimes,” you say, closing it quickly. “Nothing fancy.”

“Nothing fancy?!!?” he scoffs. “You could design our logos! You could decorate this whole ship and give it some real character! You should talk to Franky!”

“Oh, thanks Sanji.” His compliment makes you blush. “But I don’t really like to show my work to others or show it off. I just use it as a creative outlet sometimes.”

“Oh!” He looks back at the notebook at smiles. “Well if you ever want someone to show it to, I would love to see the rest of them.”

You sheepishly give the notebook back to him, and the two of you flip through the rest of it together. 

Zoro

Zoro walks up to you while you’re sitting on the deck. “Is this yours?” he asks, holding your sketch binder. “I found it in our room. Never seen it before.”

He opens it and flips through it, and you jump up to grab it. “It’s some really good stuff,” he mumbles, and you snatch it out of his hands and snap it closed. 

“Thanks!” you say, holding it close to your chest. 

“Hey wait, I was still looking!” He reaches out for it but you pull away.

“It’s mine!” you say, taking a few steps back from him so he can’t leap forward and grab it. 

He huffs and rolls his eyes, turning away from you to go back to whatever he was doing. 

“It looked really good,” he called back to you. “I liked the themed pages you made for each crew members. Especially ours.” He winked at you and walked away without another word.

You’ll occasionally find your binder moved from where you last placed it, or find little extra things (like subtle lines or shading) added to doodles as proof that Zoro was occasionally checking it out, but he doesn’t comment on it or tell anyone else about it. He just waits for you to bring it up and show you again before he outwardly comments on how much he likes your work. 

Law

“Law,” you call out, walking into his office. “Have you seen my green binder anywhere?”

“Over here,” he yells from the back room. You walk into his lab to find it sitting on top of his books. He’s measuring out some kind of liquid, focused on getting it perfect. “I really liked what you did with our jolly roger on page three. I was thinking we could adopt it for some of the gear we have.”

“You looked through it?” you gasp, your eyes flicking over to your sketchbook. 

His gaze moves away from the beaker in front of him and over to you for a moment. “Was I not supposed to? It was on my desk.” 

You cursed silently. You had been doodling last night while he was reshelving some books, you must’ve left it behind when you all went to bed.

He stood up, abandoning his project to put his full attention on you now. “I didn’t know you liked to do graffiti and sketches. We could definitely spruce up the outside of the ship soon and use some of your designs, you know? Or have a crew wall in the common area. The names you did on page ten really captured the essence of each crew member, it’d be cool to have that displayed somewhere.”

You feel anxious at the thought, and Law can feel it. “You don’t have to,” he rushes to say. “It’s just a thought.”

“Can I think about it?” you ask, and he nods in agreement. 

“You should show them though. The others. You’re talented, and I’m sure they’d like to see it.”

He goes back to his work, and he doesn’t bring it up again, but he clears off a wall in the common room and sets out some spray paint if you ever feel up for it. And he always keeps his eye out for a chance to steal a glimpse of new work you’ve done in your green binder.

[copperbadge]

Hi, please ignore if this is too personal, but as someone with Jewish ancestors who is considering conversion, I'd love to know your reasons for converting? For me it's more about community and reconnecting with that part of my family (there's a complicated family history there) than about religious belief, but I'm worried that might not be enough of a reason, if you know what I mean?

I don't know, I think conversion to Judaism is hard enough that if you don't have "enough" of a reason, you'll find out -- but I also think that one doesn't have to have a "sufficient" reason to convert to any faith which allows it, just determination and respect. If you want a connection to your ancestors and community, that's a very powerful motivation. And if it's not enough to sustain you through conversion, that's still a huge self-discovery for you, and while some practice should remain closed, you can still connect through things like traditionally Jewish foods and appreciation for Jewish art and culture.

For me, it's not that it's too personal, but it's difficult to vocalize; often when I'm asked about converting there's an assumption that I'm marrying a Jewish person, and when I say no, I usually add, "I just hear a call." Which admittedly is much more often said by Christians joining a ministry, but it's the most truthful I know how to be in short. Something in Judaism speaks to something in me. I have very little Jewish ancestry (although every time the DNA websites reevaluate their calculations it ticks up a percentage point, which is hilarious to me; I'm up from 2% to 6% currently) but the attitude towards the divine, the strength of tradition, the respect for learning, they all speak to my soul.

Even the hard stuff -- content in Torah or Talmud that I find difficult to reconcile with modern sensibility -- is at least something to challenge me, and Judaism is a faith that encourages argument, so I'm allowed to have a critical opinion of it. I think a lot about a quote I read from someone (possibly a reader, if so I am so sorry I can't find your name in my memory) who said, "I keep kosher, but sometimes I eat bacon when I'm mad at G-d." I think a lot about my Methodist confirmation class, where I was almost kicked out because I thought the Parable of the Wedding Feast was stupid and continued to argue against it after, realistically, I should have stopped; if it had been a class for a Bar Mitzvah, we might have been allowed to really examine it instead of glancing across it awkwardly and moving on. (As I found out years later, it was basically about how anyone can be a Christian but Jews should be punished for refusing to convert, so you know. Even as a kid I was very Jewish in my approach to theology and knew anti-Semitic propaganda when I heard it.)

I like that so many of the traditions involve things that I find compelling: bread, fire, water, the written word, the cycle of the harvest. I like that there's a search for truth and precision in Jewish scholarship, and that scholarship often seems to reward a neurodiverse approach to faith and study. As someone committed to philanthropy and versed in radical compassion, the exhortation to care for others baked into every foundational Jewish text is also very attractive. Some of the prayers I find viscerally satisfying (particularly the Traveler's Prayer, for some reason).

I find faith in a single divine entity extremely difficult, but one of the first things that got me to seriously consider Judaism (something I'd already been interested in) was being told that you can be an atheist Jew. To be able to commit to a faith community while still struggling with faith itself feels special to me. Whether a divine entity caused the miracle of the oil we celebrate this time of year is immaterial to me; the beauty of the narrative, the righteous rebellion rewarded with eight nights of light, is enough for me.

I might never finish conversion; realistically while I've done a lot of studying I still haven't worked extensively with a rabbi on a conversion path, and I do not call myself a Jew and won't until I complete conversion (I do observe a lot of the holidays and prayers, but mainly because that's generally advice to converts, so they can understand the demands of the faith and the myriad issues with being Publicly Jewish). But that's fine too; Judaism has been around for thousands of years, it'll wait for me, and if I never convert I'm still enjoying the journey.

[seospicybin]

SATURN.

Hyunjin x reader. (s,f,a)

Synopsis: Realized that Hyunjin's true love will always be his art, you decided to move on with your life to only cross path with him once more. (6,7k words)

Author's note: Don't say I didn't warn you!

Black and blue.

Hwang Hyunjin had been painting his canvas with those two colors, black and blue, and the hues in between.

"What are you painting?" You asked as you took a little break from your painting to see him working, at how he immersed himself in it, becoming one with his art.

"I dream my painting and I paint my dream," he responded with the Van Gogh quote he always uttered to you whenever you ask almost the same question every other day.

Or to be exact every Saturday afternoon.

You took a painting class because it had always been your hobby since you were a teenager. You love it simply because it's relaxing to you and you feel a little more alive when you paint. Many people said you have a talent for it and a lot more people had coaxed you to make your hobby into a career but you opposed the idea.

That would be a dream job, of course, doing something you love and making money out of it.

But sometimes, your hobby should stay as a hobby, or else it wouldn't give you the same excitement as it used to and ruin the experience for you.

You prefer working a normal job to make money and do something you love once a week, that was more than enough for you.

For Hyunjin though, it's a whole different thing.

Painting is more than just a hobby, something he does once a week or to pass time, it's his life. He believes it's what makes him, him.

He does it because it's the path he chooses for him, to be a painter and to be acknowledged by people as one.

He has the talent his skill is above everyone in the class and you believe the only reason he attended the class is nothing but to paint more.

You wouldn't say you knew him, you didn't know each other apart from you always sitting next to each other and chatting a little during class. You weren't that close to being considered as friends, well acquainted was more like it.

"See you next week!" You say to each other after class and after that, you went to your respective homes. It was never more than that.

Except on that one rainy day in spring.

It wasn't like you have anything to do for the rest of the day, you decided to wait for the rain to stop by sitting on the big windowsill with the raindrops tapping against the glass.

You took out your sketchbook and pencil case when Hyunjin came then sat at the other end of the windowsill.

"It's a spring rain," he said, also taking out his sketchbook.

"What are you going to draw?" You asked and regretted asking because you could guess what his answer would be.

"You," he shortly replied.

You pursed your lips, guessing if he was joking or not.

"And I'll draw you!" you said back and not getting any complaints from him.

It was more like a challenge you put on yourself, you knew it would be hard to draw him, impossible even. He's so beautiful, his facial features are sharp yet delicate, God must have taken his time creating him, making him the most beautiful human you ever laid your eyes on.

"Beautiful necklace!" He beamed.

You glanced up from your drawing when he already looked down at his drawing, your hand flew to your necklace, rubbing the pendant between your thumb and index finger, "thanks, it's a family heirloom."

Since you were already looking at him, you looked at him intently, observing his face to catch something no one has ever seen on him or something subtle that people miss.

You leaned in close and he glanced up to find you staring at him, "what?"

You squinted your eyes and touched the faint mole under his eyes, "I didn't notice this before!"

You leaned back and continued drawing, trying to draw him as best as you could, trying not to at least, made a disappointing drawing of him.

When the rain turned into drizzle, you finished drawing him or what you thought is the best drawing you could ever do of him.

"I'm finished!" You said, looking at him who was still deep in concentration with a crease formed between his eyebrows.

He flipped his sketchbook shut and looked up at you, "let me see!"

You hesitated to hand it to him, your finger fiddling with the spine of your sketchbook, gripping it tightly.

He held out his hand at you, long fingers adorned with rings reaching out at you.

"Let me see!" he said again.

You reluctantly gave your sketchbook to him, getting a little anxious as he took it and flipped it to the drawing you did of him.

His fingers trailed the paper as if he was touching his face, feeling every stroke of your pencil on it.

"I'm not good at doing portrait drawing," you quickly told him, giving him an explanation even though he was quiet the whole time he looked at your drawing.

Then he ripped the paper out of your sketchbook and put the drawing in his book, "I'll take this!"

Your eyes widened in surprise, "You have to pay for that!" You joked.

He roughly shoved his sketchbook into his bag, "how about dinner?"

"Huh?" You got confused by his answer.

"I'll pay it with dinner," he said again then got down from the windowsill.

You were joking, you didn't think that he would take it seriously. Then you checked the time on your phone and it was hardly five pm, "but it's too early for dinner."

He shrugged and hoisted his bag higher on his shoulder, "do you have something else to do?"

Would it be embarrassing to tell him that you don't have anything to do on a Saturday night? Or every Saturday night for that matter?

"I don't have any plans... no," you settled with a simple answer.

"Okay then, let's go!" He offered his hand to help you get off the windowsill.

The rain has stopped completely when you walked out, he asked where you live so he could think of a place to eat somewhere in the area.

It was the most personal thing he ever asked you and he did it for your convenience.

"Where do you live?" You asked back since he asked yours and it was appropriate to ask for his as well.

"I live downtown," he vaguely answered while swiping his card to enter the subway station.

There were a lot of eyes looking your way, but when you looked twice, they were actually on Hyunjin. You understood that he's pleasant to the eyes, it would be hard to not glance his way.

When you looked at him though, he looked unbothered and you thought he must be so used to this.

He grabbed the strap of your bag and pulled you to the side as someone walked past you.

"What about noodles?" He asked.

"Hmm?" Your mind was elsewhere a few minutes ago and then he asked you out of the blue.

"Noodles for dinner?" He asked again.

You squinted your eyes at him, "Come on, my drawing isn't that bad! I think I deserve meat for dinner," you teased him, nudging his shoulder and earning a small smile from him.

He squinted his eyes as well and considering your offer, put an arm around your shoulder to keep you close in the crowded train in the early evening on a Saturday.

"I wouldn't say it's bad but—"

"I was joking. I'll take anything for dinner!" You quickly told him, hoping he didn't take your joke seriously again.

The train stopped at your station and he let go of your shoulder to hold your hand, leading you out of the train.

"How about both?" He asked, still holding your hand as you both climbed the stairs out of the station.

You turned your head at him and squinted, "did you read my mind?"

To wait until dinner time, you stopped by a bookstore where he recommended you his favorite novel and in return, you recommended him a book from your favorite poet. That ended up with you buying a copy for him.

"I already have a copy at home so please take it!" You pushed the book to his chest and he looked at it, having no other choice but to accept it.

"Thank you!" He muttered.

By the time dinner was served, you were already hungry, famished even. It seemed like Hyunjin was the same that nobody talked but kept stuffing your faces with food.

At one point, you both looked at each other and burst out laughing at how ridiculous you looked.

You took a stroll around the park after dinner while sipping iced coffee and enjoying the cool night air after a rainy day.

"Let's sit there!" Hyunjin pointed to the steps overlooking the river.

You followed him by sitting on the step next to him and staring up at the night, at the stars hiding behind the grey clouds.

"I often think that the night is more alive and more richly colored than the day," he said, putting his drink down next to his feet.

"Yeah?" You weren't sure about his remarks but everyone has their view about everything, it's not about right or wrong.

"Do you also paint at night?" You asked out of curiosity.

"Not always," he answered.

He looked up at the starry night and sighed, "but seeing the stars like this makes me dream."

It's so rare to find someone like him, who openly romanticize his life and is not ashamed of it, not a bit. It made you curious of what it would be like to see the world through his eyes.

"When people look at your painting, what do you want them to feel?" You asked again, purely out of curiosity.

That question got him quiet, he didn't think that you would ask a such question out of the blue. He had no answer for that, not yet.

You understood that maybe he wasn't expecting it and you quickly came up with another question.

"Can I have your drawing of me too?"

He sipped his drink and stalled, "I'm not finished yet."

You clicked your tongue at him, "don't even dare to ask for dinner when you give it to me," you joked again.

"That's fair!" He said.

Since the stars were disappearing behind the thick clouds, you took it that it was going to rain again and decided to go home.

Hyunjin insisted on walking you home no matter how many times you told him that it was only a few blocks away from the park.

It was starting to drizzle again when you arrived at the front of your apartment building, "thank you for dinner!"

"I wasn't treating you to dinner. I paid for your drawing!" He corrected.

You softly chuckled in response and stopped walking with Hyunjin also stopped on his track.

"You'd better get home fast, I think this going to turn into a big rain," you suggested.

He didn't answer but kept staring at you, making you flustered standing there right in front of him. You hurriedly thought of something to say to not let it be awkward, "see you next week!"

"See you next week!" He said back then took a step closer, opening his arms to hug you.

You opened your arms as well in reflex and hugged him back, he feels so warm and comfortable, like a spring morning.

"Goodnight!" You told him while pulling away from the hug.

He let go but put his hand on your neck, without warning, giving you a peck on the lips. Strangely, the kiss felt natural like you've done it a thousand times already while in fact, it was long overdue. Yet it felt so good, so right, better than the ones you imagined in your silly little daydreams.

He let go of the kiss and then looked at you, his thumb tenderly caressing your cheek in a slow, circular motion.

"Goodnight!" He muttered with a voice so low it was almost like a whisper.

You nodded because you didn't know what to say, your brain was failing to form a verbal response for him. You waved your hand at him instead then went inside.

It took twice the time it usually takes you to climb the stairs to get to your unit with a hand touching your lips, the lips that touched Hyunjin's lips and kissed.

It was the kiss that distorted your reality, turning it upside down and proved you that time is indeed relative, a week felt like a year when all you could think about is when your lips will reunite with his again in a rapturous, enamoring kiss.

Every week it was him holding your hand, taking you places and discovering new ones, making each other laugh and smile, while everybody else could only be jealous of you.

For one day in a week, he snatched you from real life and into his world, where you could see everything through his rose-colored lenses where everything looked enchanting and beautiful, for that one day he made you feel like you're living in a fairytale.

It was raining one night and you both ran to the nearest building to take shelter from the rain.

He removed the wet strands of hair stuck to your face from the rain while you were giggling and panting at the same time from running. He put all of the hair behind your ear and held it there, planting a soft kiss on your lips, he tasted like roses in the rain.

"Are you cold?"

"A little."

He pulled you into a hug and put his jacket around you, wrapping you in the warmth of his embrace where you rested your head on his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat, drinking in his scent of creamy vanilla and sunshine and... freshly cut flowers?

Then you realized that you were standing right outside a florist shop and saw buckets of flowers on display inside the shop, colorful and delicate, blossoming even after the sun had gone for the day.

Hyunjin noticed that you were looking at the flowers, "should we buy some?"

You shook your head, "I don't like flowers."

He jerked his head away, probably because it was the first time he heard someone say it, "Why?"

"Because they wither and eventually die," you replied.

You looked up at him, "if you want to gift me something, I expect something that lasts for a long time."

He raised one of his eyebrows, puzzled.

"You know... like gold, diamonds, company stock!" You joked.

He looked the other way, at the night sky that poured rain that was getting heavier.

"We're already close, if we ran, we might make it in 5 minutes," he said while taking his jacket off.

You laughed at how he didn't respond to your remark and changed the subject. Then he put the jacket on both of your heads and his hand held yours.

"Are we going to run through the rain?" You asked, thinking he wasn't really serious about the suggestion.

"We're already drenched anyway, what difference would it make?" He asked.

You looked down at your clothes and he was right, you were already soaking wet, a little more rain wouldn't be a problem.

"Come on! Run!"

The two of you ran and kept on running, you led the way while he kept you close with his hand clasped yours so tight, didn't care about the water splashing as you stepped on the puddles on the pavements.

The drops of water dripped down the end of your clothes as you climbed to your unit and Hyunjin followed you from behind, too busy catching his breath.

"The blue one or the black one?" You asked, letting him choose from the two bathrobes you have in the house.

"Black."

You handed him the one he chose and he didn't hesitate to take his clothes off right then and there, putting the clothes straight into the washing machine.

He stripped his clothes off until he was stark naked in front of you and unfazed by your presence. You knew you should be looking away, but you couldn't, you kept staring at him, at his lanky figure, dainty waist, the mass of his muscles, on his arms, stomach, and thighs, he was just perfect. 

In contrast to his calm, your heart was beating so loud, you believed he could hear it too.

He put his bathrobe on and turned to face you, "aren't you going to take your clothes off too?"

Your mind was adrift, it took you a minute for it to be back to your head, "huh?"

"Aren't you going to wash them too?" He asked again.

You swallowed hard, starting to get nervous, or maybe it was the cold that started to seep into your body. You took a deep breath and started by taking your shirt first, it was hard because the fabric stuck to your skin.

Like you weren't anxious enough, the button got stuck in your hair when you pulled it over your head, "Ouch!"

"Here, let me help you!" He offered, getting behind you to carefully untangle the hair.

There was a sudden rise in your body temperature and you thought that it was coming from the heat his body emitting, the kind of heat that you wanted to envelop your whole.

"There!" He said, letting you know he was done helping you with the crisis.

"Thank you!" You muttered, throwing the shirt into the washing machine.

Hyunjin sighed and turned away, "I'll make tea!"

You smiled because there was no way he would know where to get anything in your kitchen but he did it so you can have some privacy to take the rest of your clothes off.

Hyunjin managed to locate where you store the mugs and he was boiling some water, you quickly walked to the cabinet to get a box of teabags, then put one on each mug.

"I hope you like a lemon balm!" You said.

Hyunjin carefully poured the boiling water into the mugs and let the tea brew, you helped by dumping the teabags until you saw his soaked bag on the dining table.

"Oh no!" You rushed to spill the contents of his bag, knowing that he got a sketchbook in there and afraid they would get damp, ruining all of his artwork.

You saw the book you bought him and there was a bookmark between the pages, "you're reading it!"

"Of course, you bought it for me!" He casually said while carrying the mugs of tea to the dining table.

You got touched, and you bought it as a gift but knowing that he read it meant so much more to you, that meant he treasured it, cherished a gift you gave, and probably got a grasp on why you like it so much.

It was comforting to have him in the apartment, just sitting and having tea with him, the rain had stopped but the night was not yet ended.

You wanted him to stay for as long.

"Will you stay the night with me?" You blurted out your thought, fingers gripping the handle of the mug so tightly.

"What makes you think I have another plan?" He asked back after sipping his tea.

You didn't know why everything felt so natural with him like you'd done it thousands of times already, how easily he entered your life without making you feel you were being invaded.

"You have so many books," Hyunjin said, pointing to the stack of books on the bedside table.

"I read when I can't sleep," you elaborated.

Hyunjin took a copy of the same book you bought him and flipped it open, finding the poem you marked with a flower sticker.

"That's my favorite one!" You elaborated.

He gave you the book, "Read it to me," he requested, shifting on the bed to face you.

"I don't know, I'm not sure–"

You reluctantly took it from him, conflicted about whether to fulfill his request and let him know you suck at reading poems or disappoint him straight away by not doing it.

"You only need to read it," he said.

"Okay then I'll just read my favorite part," you caved in then held the book a bit higher to provide you the right angle to read it.

You cleared your throat before you start reading.

"I didn't want any—" you paused to glance at him if he had a second thought.

He responded with a nod, telling you to continue.

You continued reading and restarted it from the beginning, 

"I didn’t want any flowers, I only wanted

To lie with my hands turned up and be utterly empty.

How free it is, you have no idea how free—

The peacefulness is so big it dazes you,

And it asks for nothing, a name tag, a few trinkets.

It is what the dead close on, finally; I imagine them   

Shutting their mouths on it, like a Communion tablet."   

You immediately closed the book before he asked you to continue.

"That's it!" You said but didn't dare to look his way, it was embarrassing enough to have him listen to you reading him a poem, and the silence that hung in the room only amplified the awkwardness.

He gently grabbed your chin and turned your head to meet him, then he slowly leaned in to kiss your lips, so tenderly like you were a fragile paper doll.

You opened your eyes to find his staring into yours.

"You're achingly beautiful," he muttered and pressed a kiss on you again.

You could say the same about him, he's made of dreams and all of the heavenly things, a prince charming that is somehow trapped in this real, cruel world. He belongs in a fairytale yet he was there with you with his body molded perfectly into yours, held you close, protecting you from the nightmare that might invade your sleep.

But it was also his lonely hand that seeks yours and the kisses that found solace on your neck that woke you up.

You looked over your shoulder to have him capture your lips in a kiss, knocking the air out of you.

His free hand started to part open your bathrobe, exposing you to the night cool air, and raising the goosebumps on your skin. His hand was quick to raise your body heat with light, feather-like touches, making the butterflies in your stomach fluttering awake.

His fingertips left a trail of searing touch down your chest to eventually met your heating core and out of reflex, you shut your legs, feeling flustered.

"May I?" He asked, his plush lips grazing yours as he spoke.

You nodded, spreading your legs wide enough to let him touch you there.

A low gasp escaped your mouth the moment his hand made contact with your sex, delicately like he would touch a flower.

Hyunjin didn't hesitate to taste you with your essence coated his fingers, licking them clean.

That was so arousing and he was just as aroused, you could feel his erect member poking your rear.

"Let me make love to you..." he whispered, his warm breath tickling your ear.

"Yes, please," you responded, nodding so eagerly because when it comes to him, you lose your common sense and there was no use in pretending.

His hand parted your legs open once more and you helped by keeping your leg lifted to allow him access, to touch you more, tease your entrance with his swollen cock like you weren't drenched enough.

He kissed you so hard before putting all of his focus to push his length inside you, slowly and stopping just to make sure you were alright.

He kissed you in between your moans, "you're taking me so well," he hummed against your lips.

He placed his hand on yours, keeping your leg lifted together with you then pushed deeper until he fully buried inside you.

"Ah... perfect!" He sighed.

He kissed your lower lip and gently bit it, "you're so perfect."

Again, you could say the same thing, you could feel how hard and big he was inside you. You couldn't say anything but let out moans in response.

Hyunjin started moving, thrusting into you from behind, and in the middle, he lifted your leg higher, allowing him more space to move.

He pushed even deeper, hitting you in all the right spots that your body started to shake as pleasure bubbled up inside you.

"You're made for me," he murmured with his mouth on your shoulder.

"So perfect for me," he said again through his gritted teeth as he added more speed.

His other hand wrapped around you tight, fondling your breast in his hand, squeezing it hard knowing that you were so close to climax.

"Close... oh, close..." you breathlessly said, squeezing the hand that cupped your breast.

Hyunjin moved at an impossibly fast pace, hitting you right on the spot again and again until you come to your high, around him, in his tight embrace.

"So beautiful cumming around me like that," he sweetly praised you, putting your hair away to kiss you on the side of your face.

He thrust a few more times to eventually pull out, keeping his cock clamped between your inner thighs, and kept thrusting.

The least you could do was clench your thighs together for him, moaning with every friction he made between your slick inner thighs.

Even his moans are beautiful, low, and breathless like the sound of a gust of wind.

He grabbed your chin to sink his mouth on you again and you felt something trickling down your thigh, you sighed into his mouth knowing that he just came all over your thighs. 

He didn't let go of you yet, he held you tighter like he would float away if he didn't.

His hold was firm but his body was warm, his kisses turned tender as the night turned the darkest.

As much as Hyunjin makes the perfect prince charming, he's just as flawed as a human being. He has this notion that in order to be a great painter, every painting he made should turn out great, or at least, fit into his impossible standards of what a painting should be.

You witnessed it happening a couple of times, him being hard on himself, belittling his talent just because his painting didn't turn out the same as the one he envisioned in his head.

You stopped him from placing a big streak of black paint across his canvas, "I love it," you said.

You put his hand away, putting yourself between the painting and him.

"I love what you painted," you praised and took the paintbrush from him, joining it with your hand to not let him pick it up again.

Hyunjin said nothing but turned away, couldn't stand seeing his painting one more time.

"Let's just go home!" He said.

And by home, he meant your bed, your soft skin, and the beating heart inside your chest.

His hands painted your body with slow, gentle caresses. A canvas that was so divine he would only use the best colors but he couldn't think of any color that would match the blush on your cheeks.

He sure could get the color of his cum making streaks on your flushed body, pearly white glistening under the hazy afternoon light.

He placed kisses on your bare shoulder as you lay face down, "how are you so soft all over?"

You smiled in response, turning your head just enough to give him a quick peck on your lips.

Hyunjin took a pen lying on your bedside table and uncapped it, biting the pen cap between his teeth as he started to draw on your back shoulder.

You stayed still for him, watching him through the reflection in the full-length mirror, eyebrows knitted as he focused on the drawing he made on your skin.

After a few minutes, he finally stopped and capped the pen back. He rubbed over the skin to place a gentle kiss on it.

You didn't waste time to see what he was drawing, turning it to face the mirror and saw the drawing of flowers.

"They're not going to wither or die," he told you, placing his hand on your waist, not letting you out of his reach.

You turned to face him, "yeah but they'll be washed off when I shower tomorrow," you said.

"Then don't shower!" He joked, pulling you back to lie down on the bed again and hovering above you.

He kissed you so deep you got breathless even though the kiss only lasted for a few seconds. He then looked into your eyes, intensely yet they held sentimentality in them, "I'll make you a flower field," he promised.

You ran your hands up on each of his arms and joined them on the nape of his neck, "I'd love that."

Just like any fairytale, there was one thing that you shouldn't do, it could be pricking your finger on the spindle of a spinning wheel or one bite of an apple but for you, it was the one question that you should never ask: What are we?

There was this temptation to ask and the hope that things might turn out different from what you expected or it could be that, falling into a deep slumber and never waking again.

What you were having with him was nice, being with him, not having to name, it was all nice but the uncertainty of it all made you the slightest bit worried about what the future holds for you both.

And you wanted to be with him for as long and as far as this heart takes you.

What are we? You muttered in your head as you stared into his dark brown eyes.

Am I yours?

You asked in your head but didn't dare to let it out to the world, for him to hear.

Are you mine?

You turned over on the bed, having him pinned under you while you sat on top of him. Placing your hands on his chest to lean closer, you chose to bind him in another way.

"Promise me!" You dared him.

He got up to sit up, looking at you with unwavering eyes and long fingers trailing the shape of your jaw, "I promise."

You put your lips on him to mark his words and sealed the promise with a kiss.

It was crazy how you always crave his body, it was even crazier that he always cater to it. It was never just sex with him, it was making sweet, tender love together with him whereas you always felt so involved, in it together with him.

You bounced on his cock while he gripped your waist, guiding you, setting a pace to your movements. Your fingers clawed into his shoulders, crying in pleasure.

"You keep clenching around me," Hyunjin said between his soft grunts.

Not for one second, you thought of your pleasure, you did it for him, to please him. You took his mouth in yours and kissed him hard.

"I want you to cum inside me," you muttered.

He let go of your waist and put his hands around you, "You want me to cum inside?"

You nodded while looking at his face, a sheen of sweat formed on his forehead.

"Cum inside me," you said again before planting another kiss on his plump, red lips.

You continued moving, bouncing on his cock while he was still processing your request but he didn't get much time for the time that. You were getting him off, picking up the pace while clenching around him, smothering his cock in your tight, velvety walls.

"Gosh, you're so alluring..." he sighed.

You smiled at his praise and held his face in your hands, kissing him until he cum inside you. Hyunjin held you so tight as he buried his seed deep inside you that you found it hard to breathe.

You kept moaning, feeling his cock engorged and twitching inside you, his mouth sucked on your shoulder hard enough to leave a mark there.

His mouth eventually found yours and gave it a long, lingering kiss. When he pulled away, he kept his forehead pressed against yours, "you are..."

He paused to peck your lips, leaving your lips wet with his saliva, "you are my northern star."

The northern star, Polaris, a star that neither rises nor sets, a constant star in the dark of his sky and guides him when he's lost. Not the brightest star but holds such great importance to him. The only star that he looks up to when he needs his way home.

"You are my northern star," he muttered the praise again with a tender gaze.

When morning came, reality woke you up with the harsh truth that you couldn't stay in the fairytale too long. Hyunjin usually stayed for the rest of the weekend and never left without telling you. One day though, you sat on the edge of the bed, watching him sleep for a minute before leaving for work, looking at his sleeping figure with his back basking in the morning sun. You gently brushed his dark locks to the side and accidentally woke him up.

He caught your hand and held it in his, "why are you up?" He mumbled.

"Work," you shortly answered.

"You can stay as long as you want," you told him, rubbing the metal ring on his index finger with your thumb.

"Okay," he responded with a sleepy smile.

"I'll get going," you said.

He forced his eyes open to look at you and said, "Have a great day!"

Then he kissed your knuckles before letting you go, smiling even though his eyes were still heavy with sleep. When you came home, Hyunjin was already gone but you found a drawing of flowers stuck to your refrigerator door, there was a sign on the corner of the page, the initial H in a cursive letter.

And that was how you tried to survive another week with the promise that you get to relive that fairytale again. 

But the thick clouds cast a shadow on supposed to be a warm, sunny spring day. It wasn't the perfect lighting for an art class but everyone managed to paint something despite the gloom the day brought.

You were too immersed in your painting that you didn't realize Hyunjin barely started yet, he kept mixing paints on his palette but not a stroke of paint on his canvas yet, it was still pristine with no speck of paint on it.

Maybe he hasn't decided on what to paint yet so you left him alone, afraid that you might only disrupt his creative mind from working.

After a while, you glanced in his direction and saw that he had started painting. That put you at ease, knowing that he was just stuck on ideas and not what you thought it was, a creative block.

Then you heard a loud thud next to you, you saw that Hyunjin just dumped a whole jar of dirty water onto his painting, making the still-wet paints drip down the canvas.

"What's wrong?" You asked but you were too late to grab his hand and get an answer.

He roughly took his bag and left the class. Everyone else watched as he made his way out of the door and followed his figure until he was out of sight.

There were so many things crossing your head at that very moment, there was a part of you that wanted to run after him and asked what went wrong. But your feet stayed immobile and you froze there on your seat, deep down it was best that you let him be.

You started to doubt your decision when he didn't come to the art class the next week.

And the next week when the art class did a painting of sunflowers.

In the following week, his seat remained empty.

He didn't come on the next Saturday when it marked the first day of summer that promised brighter days ahead. You eventually stopped wishing that he'll be back and his absence told you so much about how much his presence meant to you and your presence to him, how the answers contradict each other.

You found yourself lying awake in bed at night, seeing the stars in the night sky then sighed. Hyunjin was right, seeing the stars makes you dream.

You woke up in the middle of the night to the knocking on your door and you trudged to open it, and found him behind the door with tired, sunken eyes.

You didn't ask him questions but took him to bed, lying next to him as he stared at the ceiling of your bedroom with hollow eyes.

After a moment, he took your arm out and made it a pillow for his head. He put his hand across your chest with his head nuzzled into your neck, "I want to touch people with my art..." he said.

You placed your hand on his and let him speak his thoughts out loud, "when people look at my paintings, I want them to say..."

Hyunjin took a sharp, deep breath before continuing, "he feels deeply, he feels tenderly..."

His voice was so low and broken, a picture of the state he was in, trapped in his own head, suffering from his ideas and having problems setting them free. Mostly, how tortured he was by his romantic ideal of what an artist should be.

"I know..." you said to him while squeezing his hand, assuring him that you were there and listening to him.

Hyunjin only let his heart open when he painted, he bleed through every brush of paint on his canvas, his love for his art is pure and unparalleled. He is what he paints, you can see the beauty of his paintings through the cracks of his fractured soul.

And for that, the world couldn't love him, a broken thing.

"This world was never meant for one as beautiful as you," you told him.

He exhaled a cold breath into your neck, "You're the only one who understands me."

That was also why he let you in because you were the only one who understands him, but not enough to figure him out.

It is the only way you know how to love him when all of the doors to his life are closed and he keeps his heart locked in a box.

Tears caught in your throat when you realized you weren't exactly in a fairytale, you were lost in the maze you put yourself in for trying to love him, a man whose true love is his art, not a person, not you.

"You're my northern star," he said again, tightening his hold around you.

You looked away, at the night sky through your bedroom window, and then it hits you, for when Hyunjin looked up at his sky, the first thing he would see would be the brightest star and it wasn't you.

He tenderly brushed his lips on your cheek while putting his arms around your body and closing the gap between your bodies.

His hand turned your face at him, "read me a poem," he softly spoke.

How could you think of any when all you could think about was how your love didn't make him whole, your love didn't feed him, he could and would survive without your love.

Ultimately, how much you love but it did nothing to him.

"Read me a poem..." he spoke again, his eyes were on you but he couldn't see how you were shattering from the inside.

You nodded and thought of something, despite the amplifying pain that numbed you from the inside. You got reminded of something, it wasn't a poem but a verse from a play you read once.

Hyunjin pressed his forehead to the side of your face with the tip of his nose poking your cheek, his hand clasped yours and rested on your stomach.

"Life is a flower, of which love is the honey," you began.

You stared up at the ceiling and inhaled air as it was getting harder to breathe when the truth kept weighing on you, "it's the dove and the eagle united in the sky."

You continued as he pressed another kiss on your temple, "it's a grace trembling at insistent force, it's your hand sweetly forgotten in mine."

You let the words hang in the air and seeped into the silence, let them become vain, like those three words which you decided to leave unspoken.

"Beautiful..." he sighed with a slow caress on your cheek then brought his lips onto yours.

He kissed and kissed while you swallowed it all down, further down until your feelings were buried deep in the pit of your heart never to let them out.

And the world was indeed never meant for one as beautiful as him.

While you learned that the world was never meant to be a fairytale.

-

A FEW YEARS LATER

How could you be this stupid?

Not realizing that your ring was missing until you looked down at your hand once you boarded the train that will take you home.

You managed to recall the last time you saw the ring, it was a moment before you checked out of the hotel you'd been staying in for the last three days.

The hotel insisted that one of their staff probably found it and forgot to report it to the hotel security, they told you so many excuses to stop you from going full-on hysterical about it.

The receptionist came up to you, "it might take a long time since we couldn't contact the staff on duty because of the change of shift," she informed.

The information only heightened your panic, making you even more anxious than before.

"I really need that ring back," you said with a trembling voice, holding your tears back from the fear of losing the ring forever.

"We're very sorry but we'll keep on trying to contact her and we'll do everything to get your belonging back," she explained, she was as just as panicked to see you on the verge of crying.

"No! You don't understand!" You didn't mean to snap at her like that and echo in the hotel lobby, it was almost midnight but there were still a few people going in and out of the hotel at that hour.

You took a deep breath to calm yourself down then lower your voice, "that ring is precious to me," you said again with a suppressed, frustrated tone.

You felt the tears pooling in your eyes, "I have to get it back, it's a..." your words trailed off.

At first, you thought your brain deluded you into seeing him. When it registered that it was him, it felt like a dream... seeing him again after so many years, of all many places and times, he saw you again when you were scared shitless, a nudge away from bursting into tears.

From your peripheral vision, you saw him coming in your direction and you quickly swallowed your tears away.

"It's important, it's a... a family heirloom!" You finished before looking away, away from his line of vision.

"We understand the importance of your belonging, and we'll try our best to get them back for you, for now, please remain calm and we'll get back to you once we got an update," the receptionist furtherly explained then excused herself to get back behind the desk.

It was too late to hide yourself from being seen by him, so you looked down at your feet and hoped he would turn away from you even though that would be a betrayal of your heart's desire.

You felt his hand on your shoulder and you didn't dare to breathe until he turned you around.

"Hey," he softly greeted you.

There was no way he didn't recognize you, you already expected he would despite you being the one who saw him first and tried not to let him see you.

You hesitated to look at him, you knew what damage it would cause from just seeing his face.

Then again, you missed so terribly much so you looked up and met his eyes, "hey..." you croaked.

He tilted his head to the side and the hand that was on your shoulder moved to cup your face, "are you okay?"

His hand felt warm against your cheek, it was comfortable and safe.

You hated how you hard stacked your guard up so high only for him to knock it down easily with the simplest of his touch.

"I'm..." there was a lump caught in your throat, "I'm not okay," you finished and admitted it making the tears flow out of you.

Without further questions, he pulled you into a hug and let you cry into his chest, shielding you from the hurt of the world even for just a moment.

In the middle of the night, on the sofa of the hotel lobby, he saw you struggling to open a bottle of water and doing it for you at the end.

"Do they know where is it?" He asked as he sat on the sofa next to you.

"The staff who was on duty probably took it with her," you answered, fumbling to wipe the tears in the corner of your eyes with your knuckles.

"Do they call the police?"

You shook your head, "No, I don't want to make a big fuss. I just want to get my ring back," you told him the reason why.

"That means she stole it!"

You didn't need him to put it that way. You combed your hair to the back out of frustration, "I don't know," you sighed.

You kept your head down as he placed slow, soothing rubs on your back.

"I'll be back," he said, leaving you alone on the sofa.

That only gave you time to blame yourself, how could you be this reckless and lost such an important item?

You hadn't been in your right mind recently, you had a lot on your mind that you took days off from work, hopped on a train that took you out of the city, and stayed in the hotel for days.

All that just to try to put your mind off things but it did the opposite, you couldn't stop thinking about why things went wrong.

"Let's go!" He suddenly said with his hand stretched out at you.

You looked up at him with questioning eyes.

"I have the address of the housekeeper who took your ring," he explained, "let's find her there and get your ring back!"

Deep down, you knew that there was a big possibility that the ring had gone forever. With just one look, people would know how much that ring costs.

But you didn't want to give up on looking until you were a hundred percent sure it was really gone.

The streets were almost empty when you arrived at the neighborhood of the housekeeper's address. You climbed the stairs that took you to her apartment and rang the doorbell several times.

You tried knocking on the door as well but there was no answer.

You slumped against the wall, getting more hopeless the louder Hyunjin banged on the door.

The next-door neighbor probably heard it and poked his head out of his apartment door, an elderly with a balding forehead and grey hair.

"Are you looking for Mrs. Kim?"

You were the one who noticed him first, "yes, I'm looking for the person living in this apartment," you answered, pointing to the apartment number written on the address.

"She's probably still out but she'll come back soon," he informed.

You sighed, didn’t know where to start but you needed him to know how important it was for you to meet her.

"It's urgent, I need to see her as soon as possible. If you know any way to contact her, can you please tell me?" You asked.

The elderly man saw the desperation in you, then weakly smiled, "she'll be back soon," he said again.

"How do you know she'll be back soon?" Hyunjin asked this time, standing next to you facing him.

"Because her son is here with me," he answered with the same smile.

Hyunjin felt bad for being impolite to the elderly man, especially when he invited both of you to wait in his apartment and Mrs. Kim's son made you a cup of tea.

You looked around his place while sitting on the couch, he got an eccentric taste for an old man. There was a neon sign, an aquarium, a round table with a silky red tablecloth, and dried flowers hung on the wall.

"I have excellent taste in home decor, right?" He beamed at you.

You softly chuckled, feeling embarrassed to be caught by him, "No, I like it."

Mrs. Kim's son carefully placed two cups of steaming hot tea on the table in front of you then sat on the floor, working on his homework.

"I read people's cards for a living, dear," he explained, "I still take sessions but people rely everything on the internet nowadays."

"Ah!" You exclaimed.

"Have your teas, please!" He said to both of you.

You slowly lifted your teacup and brought it close enough to your mouth, blowing air on it before taking a small sip.

"You want me to read your cards?" He offered out of the blue.

You put your teacup back on the table, "Oh, no. I'm good," you kindly refused.

He waved you off, "please, it's not like I have an exciting thing to do," He pleaded.

You glanced at Hyunjin who was watching Mrs. Kim's son working on his homework and he glanced back at you with an eyebrow raised, hinting at you to accept the man's offer.

"Well, if it's not a bother," you said, relented.

"No, it's my pleasure, dear!"

He led you to sit on the chair facing the round wooden table with the silky red tablecloth while he sat across from you, then he took out a deck of tarot cards from a small drawer under the table.

"You know, this morning I did a quick reading of what my day would be and I got Page of Cups," he told you while shuffling the cards in his wrinkled yet agile hands, pretty much showing that he was experienced.

You smiled at him even though you didn't get the meaning behind his remark, you guessed it was a good thing since he said it in a happy tone.

He gave the deck of cards one last good shuffle then spread it on the table into a nice curve, the cards looked worn and slightly torn on the corner.

"Pick three cards!"

You took a deep breath, then stretched out your hand.

"Use your left hand and hover it along the card, then pick the card that speaks to your heart," he instructed as you switched your hand with the left one.

You did what he instructed you to do, hovering your hand above the spread of cards then picked the one that felt right and clicked in your heart.

He placed your three chosen cards in the middle of the table, then flipped the first one open.

There was a picture of a child passing a cup filled with flowers to another child then there are 5 other cups in front of them.

On the second card, a naked lady hovers above the earth surrounded by a green wreath.

And the last card shows a woman and a child in a boat being rowed in the water to a land that is on the other side.

The elderly man hummed as he observed the cards then nodded to himself.

You never really believed in this kind of thing but if any of the cards mean a bad thing, you were sure it affected you in a way.

"This," he pointed to the first card, "Six of cups, meaning that you've been thinking of memories, happy memories from the past," he explained.

"It could be of a thing, or a certain moment in your life or a person."

Your eyes unconsciously gazed in Hyunjin's direction and the elderly man noticed that subject of this particular card was him.

He nodded without saying anything.

"This is The World," he said, pointing to the second tarot card.

The naked woman holds a staff in each hand, she looks so divine that the creatures around her look up at her.

"But it's in reverse," he said.

Your heart skipped a beat, alerted that it might be a bad sign.

"Don't worry, it's not always bad," he comforted you.

"It means that there's a delay in your life or that you are seeking personal closure from something, halting you from going to the next cycle in your life."

He was merely reading your randomly chosen cards yet you felt so seen like he was reading through your mind and finding out everything you were trying to hide. Maybe this is why some people don't like having their fortunes read, it's like peeking into something you shouldn't be seeing in the first place.

"Don't be alarmed, dear," he said to you, he tapped his old, shriveled finger to the last card, "this last card shows a good turnout," he said.

"This is Six of swords," he elaborated, "you'll experience a transition of some kind, and it's a happy one without regret,"

A smile rose on your face, feeling relieved that your cards weren't as bad as you thought they would be.

"I'm glad to hear that," you honestly admitted to him with a sigh.

He smiled at you, then took your hands in his on the table, "Just remember, dear, in order to move forward, you have to leave something behind," he warned you with gentle eyes.

He squeezed your hands, then flashed you a comforting smile before letting go of your hands.

"Well, I hope that gives you enlightenment," he playfully said while laughing gathered all of the cards but left the last of your chosen card on the table.

"You left one," you told him.

"That one is for you," he said.

You tipped your head to the side, "for me?"

He nodded then placed the card on your open palm, "despite your sadness, you need to remember that moving on is the ideal option for your future," he said.

The words lingered like some motivational poster hung in the back of your head as you looked at the tarot card for a little while, then put it inside your bag.

You went back to the sofa and sipped your warm tea, glancing at Hyunjin who was so invested in helping Mrs. Kim's son with his math.

When your teacup was almost empty, that was when Mrs. Kim finally came knocking on the door and his son ran to open it for her.

She gave you a strange look as she got into the apartment and saw you sitting on the sofa.

"You're having guests, Mr. Lee?" She asked the elderly man.

"They're looking for you," he answered.

You quickly got up from the sofa and walked up to her, "Can I talk to you for a second, Mrs. Kim?" You politely asked her because you didn't feel great with his son listening in on the reason why you came for her late at night like this.

-

The truth was Mrs. Kim did take the ring with her, but since she was almost late for her second job, she forgot to turn it in to the hotel. It was indeed accidental, and you were glad that you didn't involve the police in the first place.

She thanked and apologized to you countless times until you were both back in Mr. Lee's apartment no matter how many times you told her that it was alright.

Afraid that you might lose it again, you tied a scarf on the ring and put it inside the inner pocket of your bag.

"Thank you once again for kindly letting us wait here," you told Mr. Lee.

"I'm sorry that we disturb you late at night like this," Hyunjin added, feeling sorry for both Mr. Lee and Mrs. Kim, also his son.

"No worries. It's a happy surprise," he said to you.

You were feeling blue for saying goodbye to them, added to the fact that you wouldn't see them again, it was a nice short meeting on an eventful night. One that you would remember you shared with an odd ensemble of people in your life.

You didn't remember climbing these stairs before, maybe the anxiety took you completely that you couldn't think of anything but the ring.

Then you got it back and you felt so relieved, you kept exhaling air as you climbed down the stairs. The tension slowly subsides, leaving you completely drained to eventually slip on your foot and fell down the steps.

Hyunjin rushed to help you, kneeling on the wet pavements from the melting snow, soaking your coat and jeans.

"Are you okay?" His voice was tinted with concerns.

You nodded and took a moment to sit there, "It's the uh... tension..." you breathlessly answered.

"Let's take a taxi back to the hotel!" He put an arm around you to help you get up.

You brushed your dirty hands together, "No, I have to go to the train station."

Hyunjin helped you to stand on your feet and craned his neck to find a taxi nearby, "you can always take the first train home tomorrow," he insisted and waved his hand to hail a taxi.

"I have to go home fast, I have—" you yelped when you saw the scrape on the heel of your hand.

The taxi pulled to the side of the street and Hyunjin opened the door for you, "I'll take you to the train station myself first thing in the morning," he promised and helped you get into the car.

-

Hyunjin already changed into comfortable clothes when you got out of the bathroom wearing the hotel bathrobe, he insisted on getting your dirty clothes laundered and will be delivered back in the morning.

"I ordered dinner earlier but it's already cold now," he said, gesturing you to sit on the small dining table.

"I tried to order a new one but the kitchen is closed," he furtherly explained, placing the utensils in front of you.

Since you were no longer anxious, you got to see him closely, his hair was still long but a bit shorter than the hair he had a few years ago and his facial features were more evident, defining his age and reminding you that he got older too just like you.

But Hyunjin will always be beautiful... warm eyes, sweet smile and you looked down at his delicate hands that have created so many beautiful paintings.

"I'll make us tea," he said, leaving the table to turn on the water boiler.

You dig into the plate and laughed at how the pasta became stiff that you had a hard time twirling it with your fork.

Hyunjin softly laughed seeing you struggling to eat it, he helped by stirring it with a spoon.

"Are you still painting?" He suddenly asked.

You already knew that the question would come out at some point, "I stopped painting a year ago," you shortly replied.

He put down the spoon and looked at you, "Why?"

You shrugged and shoved a forkful of pasta into your mouth, "it just hit me that art supplies are really expensive," you joked.

You slid the plate toward him, "let's share the dinner," you offered.

Hyunjin stared at you for a few seconds before digging into the pasta, "Sure!"

There was a knock on the door when the two of you were having tea, it was a hotel staff delivering a first-aid kit box for Hyunjin.

"Can you sit here?" He asked you, patting the space on the bed next to him.

"I can do it myself," you kindly refused.

"Please?" He pleaded with a soft voice.

You walked to the bed and sat next to him with the box of first-aid kit opened on the floor next to his feet.

"Your hand," he asked for your hand.

You held it out for him, "it's just a scrape," you said.

He didn't say anything but carefully put ointment on the wound with a cotton swab, so carefully and blowing on it once in a while.

He's so, so beautiful and you once again felt like being in a fairytale again.

A prince charming helping a damsel in distress.

He put the bandaid next and made sure it securely covered the wound.

"Thank you!" You muttered.

But he wasn't done yet, he took your other hand and turned it over, saw the deep scar that ran along the side of your palm.

"Is this why you stopped painting?" He asked.

You were stupid to ever think that he wouldn't notice, Hyunjin has always been that, attentive and observant.

"I got into an accident a year ago," you explained because there was no use in hiding it from him anymore.

"Crushed half of my hand, my ring and pinky fingers are paralyzed but I'm still lucky—"

Your words got cut off as Hyunjin placed his lips on it, kissing your scar like it would magically heal it for you. He pressed a kiss along the scar with eyes closed like it was hurtful to do so.

Maybe he couldn't heal you, but everything he does felt magical.

You suddenly got hit by a wave of sadness that came from how much you missed him, yearned for him, and longed for him.

A tear rolled down your face, out of happiness or relief, you didn't know which.

"I missed you," your voice quivering against your sniffles and you swallowed air to help you finish the sentence, "so terribly much."

Your tears kept flowing out of you like a river and you couldn't stop it, guessed your heart was just as happy to be close to his once more as he pulled you into a hug.

"I missed you too," he said as he held you tight, wrapping you in his arms.

And you crumbled in his arms, into the warmth that was once offered the safest embrace, reminded you of the most painful and happiest time of your life.

He took a moment to look at your face and gently wiped your tears with his knuckles, smiling so fondly as he doing it.

Then, he ever so softly placed his lips on yours and stayed like that for a while. Just his lips on your lips, plush and warm.

And it felt like coming home to him.

He had been places, new places, strange places, beautiful places with the most breathtaking sceneries but nothing can beat this wonderful feeling of coming home.

You provide comfort and warmth, a body that is so pliant to his touch, molded to his body when he holds you against him, and a hand that could break open his heart just from resting it on his chest.

His fingertip traced the curve of your lips before kissing it, it instantly took him back to the rainy spring days, your feet tangled and hands touching each other under the cover.

The days when he had the least confidence in his dream but also the happiest when he was with you.

"It's you, isn't it?" You asked out of the blue.

Hyunjin tangled his hand in your hair, "mmh?"

"The painter with the initial H," you answered.

You didn't need to wait for his answer, from the subtle shock visible on his face, you could tell that your guess was true. It wasn't just about the initial that fits his name, but from his paintings, you could feel all these endearing, gentle touches of his hands in every brush of paint on the canvas.

It was vivid, intense, and flawed but if you could see through the cracks, you could find him there, pure, delicate, and bewitching, Hyunjin.

"It's true," he admitted and brought his hand to your jaw, "that's me."

You triumphantly smiled because your heart knows him well more than your mind could perceive.

"I'm so happy for you," you genuinely said to him because you knew how much he wanted to be a great painter, and being acknowledged as one, all of that came true.

Hyunjin connected the dots and noticed something, "did you come here to see the exhibition?"

You let him slip his fingers between the spaces of your fingers, "yes."

He couldn't be happier to know that not only had he found his way home but a home that welcomed him to stay.

"What do you think?"

Art is not about right or wrong, like or dislike, good or bad, art is a tool people use to convey the message it wants to tell to the world. And it's imperative that you get the message in his paintings.

"They're..." you paused to try to fathom your thoughts into words as he held onto your hand as if his life depends on your words.

"A little reserved, tender..." your eyes stared deep into his before finishing your sentence, "beautiful just like you."

But nothing could quite describe how beautiful you looked when you said those words to him and how it made him feel, it would be impossible to paint it as well.

"Are you happy?"

That one question turned the table back to him, he never even asked that himself.

"Are you happy with your paintings?" You asked again.

He had to look deep within himself to find the answer, he got older and he lost pieces of himself, good or bad, it was inevitable. There was still a stubborn part in him, but he knows how to make peace with it.

And he could confidently answer, "yes."

"I'm happy for you," you responded with a delightful sigh, that was all that mattered to you, he made peace with himself.

He pulled you closer and held you tighter because the regrets of leaving you a few years ago came haunting him again.

How he left the morning after when you were still fast asleep and stopped coming to the painting class, he couldn't afford love at that time, the fear of losing his passion for his art was much bigger than the fear of not being able to give you the love you deserve.

"I'm sorry I left," he muttered and it felt bitter coming out of his mouth, how he hated himself still for it.

"It's okay. I understand," your voice was muffled as you nuzzled your head into his chest.

"What I did was—" he stopped talking mid-sentence as if it was painful to keep talking.

"What you did is right," you convinced, then forced him to look at you in the eyes, "there's no guarantee that you'd be this great if you stayed."

That didn't make Hyunjin feel a little less guilty, his conscience remained the same, "I'm sorry."

You put your hand on his chest to stop him from muttering another apology, "you're happy now. That's all that matters."

"And how about you? Are you happy?" He turned the table back at you.

You nuzzled your head further into his neck and nodded, "I'm happy."

And that was all that mattered to him.

He put your hair to the side and looked into your eyes which guided him back here, his haven, home.

"My northern star," he sighed.

And he wanted to stay in that home, own it and live in it, forever.

-

Your hands folded under your head, snuggling up to his chest to seek more warmth as the night had turned to morning.

Hyunjin watched you sleeping and he felt nostalgic, at how it reminded him of the days he spent in your bed, waking up next to you and seeing your face first thing in the morning.

There was a crease on your forehead and he put his finger to make it disappear, warding the nightmare that might reside in your sleep.

"I'll make it go away," Hyunjin muttered under his breath, rubbing over the crease on your forehead while holding your face with such loving.

Your eyes fluttered open and he quickly removed his finger from your forehead.

"Good morning!" He said out of reflex.

You blinked your eyes a few times to adjust to the light and rubbed them.

"Morning!" You mumbled your reply.

You looked so adorable to him, still lost between dreamland and reality, pure and innocent. He couldn't help but kiss you.

That took you by surprise as you stiffen against his kiss and when he pulled away, you shyly smiled at him.

"That's a bad idea. I haven't brushed my teeth," you meekly told him.

He chuckled at your flustered response and ignored your warning, pinning you under him so he could press another kiss.

A kiss that takes things further and you opened the gate to him by letting him invade your mouth. His hands silently made their way to part your bathrobe open, exposing your heavenly body to him.

He abruptly stopped kissing you to take his t-shirt off in one swift move because he needed to feel you skin-to-skin, he wanted that softness lathering him all over.

He kissed and kissed, dragged his mouth down your neck and chest to put it on your lips again with hands touching you all over.

Then all of a sudden, he pulled away with his face hovering a few inches above yours.

"Stay for one more day," he asked.

All he needed was one more day to show you that he wouldn't leave this time around.

"Just one more day!"

The glints in his eyes told you how much he wanted you to stay and he couldn't afford to get the unwanted answer from you.

Before you could think of an answer, he put his lips on you again and put his body on top of you, a hand propped on your side to not put his whole weight on you.

But you have to let him know, "Hyunjin..." you tried again.

"Please?"

And the plead tasted so sweet against your lips.

How could you say no to him? But you couldn't say yes either. You got quiet as you thought of a way to put things gently.

Hyunjin placed kisses down the side of your face as his hand went lower, lower to down south until his fingers met the elastic band of your underwear.

"Hyunjin," you stammered, couldn't focus when he caught your ear shell between his plush lips, "Hyunjin, I can—"

The knocking on the door put a halt to everything and you sat on the bed, putting on your bathrobe again.

"That must be my clothes," you said and got off the bed to open the door.

The breakfast was already served when you got out of the bathroom, dressed in your freshly laundered clothes.

But his eyes darted to the ring on your finger and it seemed like you decided to put it on that day. The blue diamond looked striking against your skin tone.

He poured coffee into your empty cup, knowing that you prefer that for your morning drink.

"That's a nice ring!" He complimented without looking at it. "No wonder you were so terrified of losing it," he added.

You put your hand on your lap, under the table, out of his sight.

"Thank you," you weakly said and sipped your coffee.

He finished his toast in two bites and got up from his chair, "I'm going to shower."

"Okay," you responded, looking up at him with a smile.

The taxi ride to the station was short, probably it was because of Sunday morning which caused no significant traffic.

But the station was already crowded with people, Hyunjin waited as you bought your ticket.

You clutched your bag in front of you as you walked back to him, "my train will leave in half an hour."

Hyunjin had been trying to make sense of it all, the ring, the reason why you came here, how you met and why you needed to get back home. He came to one conclusion.

He took both of your hands and held them, "don't lose it again," he said with his thumb rubbing over the ring.

You softly chuckled and nodded.

Hyunjin sighed and gathered his guts to blurt out the truth: you came here not to restart.

"I know it's not a family heirloom."

The smile on your face slowly faded like someone had brought the brightness down.

"I know you have someone waiting for you back home," he said even though it was hard for him to say it out loud, he didn't want to acknowledge it but at the same time, he couldn't just ignore it.

"Hyunjin, I—" you choked on your tears as tears streamed down your face and he had enough of seeing you crying.

"Shh... please, don't cry!" He cooed, holding your face in his hands like you were a fragile object.

You took a deep breath and began to explain everything, "I had a second thoughts about my engagement."

"You don't have to—"

You shook your head, "that's why I came here, I came to see your paintings in the hope I get to settle this matter... this attachment... to fill this hole in my chest," you continued with a trembling voice.

"But my heart ached for you, Hyunjin. I was broken and you took a piece of me with you when you left," you cried harder and it was heartbreaking to know that he caused you all of this.

"I couldn't move past it... I tried so many times and I couldn't," you vigorously shook your head and crumbled completely in front of him.

Hyunjin didn't realize he was crying too until tears rolled down both of his cheeks, he immediately brushed it off with his hands and pulled you into a hug.

"I tried to love someone else but you keep calling to me," you sobbed into his chest.

This wouldn't happen if he didn't leave without telling you, he could have told you that he couldn't love you at that time and let you go to love someone else, someone who deserves it.

He didn't know that it will have you tethered to him.

"I'm sorry," he repeatedly said because that was all he could come up with, a limitless amount of apology.

He hugged you so warmly and shielded you from the world, letting you cry your heart out, let the pain that he caused seeping back into him.

It would be unfair for him to keep you chained to him, you deserve your happiness as much as he deserves his.

He tilted your head up and attentively wiped the tears from your face, he looked at you with eyes that had seen behind the veil.

Then he slowly brought his lips to yours and gently kissed you, kissed you like he never had and never will. Star-crossed lovers are on the verge of collapsing.

I let go of my claim on you, he said in his head as he kissed you again with the utmost affection he has for you, breaking and shattering, shrinking and deflating. He didn't know how would he recover from that but time heals, time heals everything.

"I want you to be happy," he said.

He brushed your hair to the side and held them there, "are you happy?"

You nodded.

"Are you happy with him?"

You nodded again.

"Does he make you happy?"

"Yes."

"Good!" Hyunjin beamed while nodding his head.

"That's all I need to know," he kissed you again for your lips will never touch again.

After a moment, he let go of the kiss with a gasp.

"I'm sorry but kissing someone's fiancé is kind of hot," he joked.

You sadly laughed while wiping your teary-eyed and bravely looked at him, "thank you for keeping your promise," you told him.

"The flower field," you said, "it's beautiful."

He was more than glad to know that his message was received. A painting of a flower field that he promised you and wanted to show you himself. But he didn't have the chance to do that, he has to set you free and let you fly.

"You'd better get on the train," he reminded you with a squeeze on your shoulder.

You took a long last look at him and smiled with your aching heart, "you are a great painter, Hyunjin."

You took his hand and squeezed it, "You do feel deeply and tenderly," you praised.

There was a lump forming in his throat but he wouldn't let it out, you were the only one capable to deliver such earnest praises and moving his heart.

"Thank you," he said, squeezing your hand back.

There was an announcement to board your train and you hurriedly slung your bag on your shoulder, "it's time," you said with a sad smile.

It was time, time to go and time to let go, time to move on and part ways, time to say goodbye because this is where your life path branched out.

Hyunjin took a deep breath to lessen the pain inside his chest, "I'll see you next Saturday!" He joked or it was his wistful thinking to wanting to go back to those days.

You chuckled then it changed into a sad smile, "I'll see you next Saturday!" you said back.

You took your hand back from him and he let it slip away, and started walking away from him.

He watched you stop after a few steps and turned around, running to give him one last hug. He knew you were crying again but you let go so fast, he didn't get to hug you back. He could only watch as you walked further away from him.

You kept walking and walking without looking back at him and he realized that he has just become the past.

-

The exhibition wasn't open yet but the security knew he was one of the artists featured there, letting him in without questions.

He strolled through the gallery flooded with the morning sunlight and sat on the bench facing his painting, the painting that evoked so many things out of him.

The Flower Field by H.

He suddenly remembered the poem you read to him on the last night he spent with you.

'Life is a flower, of which love is the honey.'

But you are not flower nor honey, you are a field filled with the most beautiful flowers and he wanted to stay there, lay down with his eyes closed and his hands turned up.

It was the only painting that tells so much about him, where he poured his heart out and let it open for the world to see.

He pulled his phone out of his jeans pocket and called his agent, he picked up on the second ring.

"I have told everyone that you'll never sell The Flower Field," his agent said through the phone, knowing that he would reject so many offers for this one painting.

"I changed my mind," Hyunjin said.

There was a long silence before his agent could respond to his remark, "you want to sell it?"

"Yes."

There was another silence then a long sigh, "there's this good offer from a gallery—"

"I don't care who you sell it to, just... I don't want to know," he resisted the lump in his throat to come out by swallowing it down.

"What happened? What changed?" His agent said because it was just last night he insisted on never selling the painting.

"The northern star," his voice broke at the end of the sentence and he tried again, "I lost the northern star."

His agent got confused by his answer but he sensed that something was not alright, "it's okay, you will make a lot of paintings better than this," he comforted.

Hyunjin's face dropped as his phone slipped from his hand and fell onto his lap. He couldn't look at the painting anymore without the reminder that he made it for you with the thoughts of you in his head and the poem you read to him.

No, he can't make better paintings than this because it was done in love and what is done with love is well done.

He felt stupid for believing his art is far greater than loving you, it was the opposite. It was your love that brought out the emotions in him, the force to keep thriving and push himself to keep going. It was your love that makes his art harbor so much more than just a message, there are emotions and memories. The painting is a love letter that will not wither nor die, just like his feelings for you.

But Hyunjin was too late to learn that there is nothing more truly artistic than to love people.

-

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[hanleiacelebration]

Han/Leia Appreciation Week 2024

WE'RE BACK, BABY! "Wait, what's happening, wasn't this in August??" you might wonder. Based on your feedback, we decided to host this and (probably) future editions of Han/Leia Appreciation Week earlier in the year. July seemed like the better choice, given that it's a vacation period in both hemispheres!

This year we're also giving you the prompts over a month in advance, so you have plenty of time to plan and create!

Han/Leia Appreciation Week was an event originally hosted at @han-leia-solo between 2016-2019, but for the past three years, we've taken up the mantle here at @hanleiacelebration 😊

💖 How does Han/Leia Appreciation Week work?

The event will run from July 14th to July 20th, and there will be two different prompts each day that creators can fulfill with: fanfic, fanart, gifsets, graphics, fanvids, headcanons, crafts, playlists, rec lists. You’re encouraged to tag your posts with #hanleiaweek2024 so we can reblog them! After the week is over, we’ll share a masterlist with links to the works.

You can show your appreciation in many ways; however, please keep in mind that it has to be a creation of yours of some sort, e.g. don’t repost other people’s fanart, gifs, or unedited pictures. Rec lists should include a link to the original source both for fanfic and fanart (more on this after the cut).

🎆 The prompts

Sunday 7/14: Tradition / Ceremony

Monday 7/15: Braids & Bloodstripes (hair or clothing) / Home planet

Tuesday 7/16: AU / Canon divergence

Wednesday 7/17: Force / Belief

Thursday 7/18: Favorite scene / Favorite quote

Friday 7/19: Meeting / Escape

Saturday 7/20: Free day!

You can use only one of the daily prompts, combine both, reinterpret them, or skip the day if you can’t think of anything. If you’re not able to post on the same day for a prompt, you’re still encouraged to share it through the week—just don’t post works for a certain prompt before the day corresponding to that prompt.

💠 💠 💠

FAQs and Rules under the cut - please read!

💕 Can I post my work to another site and share the link on Tumblr?

Yes! This is a good option for people who might want to create explicit art that could be taken down on Tumblr, write a long fic or multichapter, or make videos or playlists.

💕 Does it have to be a new creation? Can I finish and post a WIP?

It has to be something that has never been posted anywhere else before, so finishing and sharing a WIP is okay! If it doesn’t fit any of the prompts, you can share it on Free Day.

💕 Is this event open to all ratings?

Yes! Just remember to use a “Read more” cut if you’re posting the whole work on Tumblr, and to add a note at the top if your work is rated Mature or Explicit, as well as if it has any major trigger warnings, so all folks can safely browse through the entries.

💕 Are there any length or quality requirements?

There’s no min. or max. length for fanfic or quality level for art, but please note that AI-generated works won’t be accepted. For gifsets, there’s a minimum of two gifs (that must be made by you!). For playlists, there’s a minimum of five songs. For rec lists of fic or fanart, there’s also a minimum of five recs. Some more questions you might have about rec lists:

- How do I share someone else’s art without posting a picture? You might post a thumbnail that crops a preview of the piece; if the piece has a title, you might use that; you might describe it; or you might say something like “this piece by [artist]”, and link to the source.

- What if I found a fanart on Google? Try to find the original source using reverse search image.

- What if I can’t still find it, can I just say “credit to the artist”? In that case, please just don’t share the piece.

- What if I know the artist but don’t have a link to the original source? Naming the artist and linking back to where you found it is okay, in that case.

💕 Can I write for canon/Legends and include other pairings?

All canons, time periods, headcanons and AUs are welcome, and you’re allowed to include side pairings, except for R*eylo. However, keep in mind that this is a Han/Leia appreciation week - at the risk of sounding repetitive, works should focus on appreciating Han and Leia’s relationship!

💕 What’s the time zone for the event?

Please don’t worry too much about time zones: when we say “day”, we always mean “whenever that day is for you in your part of the world”. IE: if it’s Monday for you, you can post your work for the Monday prompt.

💠 💠 💠

Do you have any other questions? Don’t hesitate to send us an ask or to message one of the mods: @lajulie24 @hanorganaas and @otterandterrier

We can’t wait to see what you all create!