#thats way too risky to gamble on

[kazumist]

THROUGH THICK AND THIN .ᐟ

✩ — in which soshiro had forgotten the lengths of your love for him.

✩ — request: hi, can i pls request an argument with hoshina and how u resolve everything 🥹🥹🥹

✩ — includes: hoshina soshiro x gn!reader. hurt/comfort, angst if u squint. cw: arguments, implications of soshiro being injured but thats just it, soshiro is kinda mean Uhm, ooc!hoshina this is another experimental fic help me. wc: 1440. reblogs and feedback are much appreciated !!

if there was one thing sharper than the blades hoshina soshiro wielded, it would be the words that escaped his lips.

hoshina knows how to sugarcoat his words. he considers himself a good talker—negiotiator, if you would. however, when it comes to more sensitive topics, that’s when it all starts to crumble down. 

he never expected for him to catch feelings, especially with the line of work he takes. it’s too risky. dangerous. worrying. but he fell as deep as the ocean could get for you. you accepted it. him and his line of work. him as a whole.

yet soshiro seems to forget that sometimes.

getting out of a mission unscathed was impossible. he would always have at least one injury planted on him. it was a repetitive game of russian roulette where either his injuries would be severe or light. and unfortunately for him, today was sadly the former. 

a knock was heard at the door of the hospital room he’s staying in. a mission had recently just finished—about three days had passed, and soshiro was unconscious for the first two due to how he overexerted himself. “come in,” he says. and to his surprise, he saw you opening the door.

soshiro hasn’t told you about him being hospitalized yet—so how?

“captain ashiro told me.” oh. so that’s how. well, he was aware that you had also built a friendship with his commander. and that was completely fine with him. it was awkward when you walked over to the bed, pulling out the chair for you to sit on. you refused to make eye contact with him while soshiro just stared at you.

neither of you has an idea of what to say.

“i wish you told me as soon as you woke up. i was worried sick when i heard the news about the kaiju attack and all.” you said, keeping your gaze focused on your fingers as they played with each other. he flinches slightly as guilt starts to bubble up inside of him. it was already five in the afternoon and he’s been awake since ten in the morning. he wishes that he told you as soon as he woke up as well.

however, there’s one thing that has started to creep onto soshiro lately—fear. insecurity, perhaps. he gets haunted by the thought that you would definitely be happier in someone else’s arms and that you would be more happy being bathed in someone else’s affection. being with a man like hoshina soshiro was dangerous, as if it were a gamble to play.

because you never know if you’ll still wake up to him being alive the next day. and believe it or not: hoshina was scared—terrified of that possibility. he doesn’t want you to be sad, he crumbles at the thought of you crying in the first place. so he made it a task for him to push you away. to be distant.

to be someone you would hate.

that’s the only way he could keep you safe.

“sorry. i didn’t want to disturb you.” bullshit.

“why…” you trailed off. soshiro noticed that you werent playing with your fingers anymore and that you were now clenching your fists. “why would you think that? soshiro, your health matters to me.” his heart also clenched when he heard the slight crack in your voice. “why would it matter to you? i could die any day.”

“are you being serious right now?” he hates it. he hates the way that the first time he saw your eyes today, they were filled with such negative emotions. anger. hurt. confusion. “do i look like i’m kidding?”

“soshiro, why are you acting like this? did i do something wrong? i know we haven’t seen each other a lot because we’ve been both busy.” no, you didn’t. this is my fault, but this is also for the best. is what he wanted to say—but he just swallows up his words. “it’s nothing.”

“no, it’s not just ‘nothing.’ tell me what’s wrong, please? so we can fix it. it pains me when we’re like this.” it pains him too—it pains him so fucking bad. but hoshina soshiro is stubborn. so he will find himself accomplishing his task, whether it pains him or not.

because all he wants is the best for you, even if he wouldn’t be able to provide that.

— — — — — — — — 

he doesn’t know how things got so heated between the two of you. and he’s sure that you both might disturb the other patients who are confined in the room next to his.

“why won’t you just tell me what’s wrong? i feel like an idiot, soshiro! what am i?! some fucking mind reader on what goes on inside your head?!”

“like i told you, it’s nothing for you to worry about! what can’t you understand with that?!”

“what can’t you understand with me saying it’s not just nothing?!”

“and what can’t you understand with me implying that you shouldn’t care anymore?! dp i have to spell it out for you?”

you weren’t sitting down anymore, and hoshina doesn’t dare to speak anymore. fighting with you was the worst. and this time, he fucked up real bad. “i… it’s getting late. i should get going.” you say, and soshiro could feel a part of him shattering when he heard you hold back a sob.

the next time soshiro saw you, he was on his day off (a day off he didn’t really want to take but captain ashiro forced him otherwise since the doctors told him he shouldn’t be making his body engage in strenuous activities just yet). and the first thing he did? he visited you. he knew you get off work early on fridays, making you free for the rest of the weekend earlier.

he knocks on your door, although hesitantly. he’s nervous as he waits for you to open the door.

and he’s grateful that you still opened the door for him in spite of your last conversation with each other. you didn’t say anything as you opened the door further, inviting him in. the awkwardness gave hoshina a rush of deja vu about the awkwardness in the hospital room.

“i’m sorry.” although these two words don’t just cut it so easily, he thinks.

“do you really mean it? what you said in the hospital?”

his breath hitched as he found the right words to say. if hoshina was going to be honest, he hasn’t thought much about what to do at this point. surely, he had achieved his goal that night, right? “yeah.”

“liar.”

he turns to you immediately, and you were already looking at him to begin with. “you’re lying, and i could tell that because you’re nibbling on your lip. you always do that when you lie. just tell me the truth, soshiro, please.”

why should he? would you accept his reason? would you accept the insecurities that haunt his every waking thought? would you accept him even though he said such mean things to you the last time you saw each other?

would you still love him despite it all?

you would. you always would. 

and so he explains from the very start—when and where these thoughts started in the first place. and you listen to him intently, absorbing every single detail he says. once he was done, you took a deep breath. 

“god, you’re so stupid. did you know that?” soshiro lets out a weak chuckle at that, avoiding your gaze. you cup his face with your hands, making him face you. “look at me,” he refuses. “soshiro, look at me.” he then complies, slowly trailing his eyes across your features before resting them on your gaze.

“you don’t get to decide what’s best for me when it comes to this type of thing, okay? i love who i want to love. you don’t get to decide that i’d be happier with someone else. because i love you. i love you more than you could ever imagine, more than you could ever feel. remember that. engrave that inside your mind so you can never forget. you are the one i am helplessly in love with, soshiro.”

i love you. i love you. i love you. it repeats inside his mind. you are the one i am helplessly in love with. it echoes. soshiro feels stupid for attempting to become someone you hated in the first place. there was no way he could ever bear the possibility of you actually hating him.

how could he forget? you had already accepted him as a whole. through thick and thin, you will stand by his side.

[leqclerc]

Is there any "number 1" driver at any other team that's as disrespected as charles is by his own team??

I know the answer is no, because they won't even admit he's the number one despite him being miles clear of his teammate.

Like imagine any of the other teams posting about a race that their driver called the worst race ever for them and then changing the story to make it seem like it was the drivers fault for not being smart like their teammate and think of "the risky gamble" themselves and not the teams fault for fucking up.

Imagine any other team refusing to acknowledge any of their drivers great driving or overtaking at a race that the win was LITERALLY TAKEN AWAY FROM HIM and to this day have not mentioned it. If one of the merc drivers or mclaren or any other team managed that copse overtake that charles did, you'd best believe they'd have posted it multiple times. But nope, according to scuderia Ferrari, Charles leclerc did not partake in Silverstone 2022.

Imagine any other driver achieving one of the most prestigious accolades in f1, a grand slam, the first for your team in 12 years. The driver thats from your academy, one of your own, and you can't even acknowledge that with a measly post. Any other team would've rolled out the red carpet to post about an achievement like that.

It pisses me off so much that charles fans are called sensitive when we count social media posts, but how can we not be when we see the way he's constantly left out to dry on track, and disregarded off track (except of course when it comes to ice bath content) Like they could post carlos' Monaco p2 despite it being such a controversial outcome for the team, but they couldn't make a post about charles australia win. I won't even get into all the interviews by binnoto and Mekies last year when they couldn't even defend their driver after they fucked up. Poor boy really is taken for granted

Ferrari social media admin when it's time to post about Charles's achievements: I sleep

Ferrari social media admin when it's time to post Charles ice bath content: Real shit

Not sure what the social media "strategy" is and at this point I'm too afraid to ask 💀 By wanting to be as vague and uncontroversial and fair as possible, they actually create more discord between fan groups... If they decided that posting throwbacks to achievements from previous seasons is going to be a thing they do, they should execute it better. Because so far what they post vs what they don't has been incredibly arbitrary (not to mention polarizing). A grand slam weekend probably carries more significance and "value" than a P2 finish, but you get a post about the latter and not a word about the former. That was certainly a choice 🤔And then of course the quote Tweets which are just............. Lord give me strength 😭🙄

Idk, honestly, I'm so tired of their "How do you do, fellow kids?" memetastic #relatable Swiftie approach to social media that I mostly just elect to ignore them and not engage with most of the posts in that vein. 🤷🏻‍♀️ It's giving Ryanair Twt account energy where instead of addressing very real complaints they choose to ratio their own passengers in the most obnoxious way possible...

[ducknotinarow]

03/07 RaphVon - [🎁] our muses exchange holiday gifts

| SEND AN EMOJI FOR A STARTER ! ↳ winter season & holiday based

Leave it to Mikey to somehow get Von and Don to agree to the baby shower idea. But hey did go all out even though at some point it seemed he forgot that it was meant for the mother seeing how the banned had to have Don's nah scribbled out and replaced by Von's. Idiot. Was Raphael's main thought as he been hanging back during most of this thing. Mikey manged to pull a few of the invited parties into the games which just seemed dumb to Raphael. He purposely said 'baby' near the start and gave his pin away to whoever was nearest to him and sort of hung towards the back of it all. The baby shower wasn't really his thing.

When he noticed Von as some point seem to take a moment to rest well Mikey had another of his game ready to start up. Raphael took it as a opening. As he made his way to sit beside Von. Holding a gift bag near his side just enough to keep it from Von's sight as he joined her. "Hey least Mikey invited you to your own baby shower in the end 'ight?" He smirks a little her way paying a second to make sure Von was fine. Offering to help her sit down if she needed it. But of course like Raph expected she was handling the whole being pregnant thing very well. But that was Yvonne for you stubborn to the bone.

Raphael's attention turned back to the party they were currently bobbing for pacifiers everyone Mikey got to go along with it had a bowl of water before them and had their hands set behind their backs. The goal was who ever got all three in their own bowls first won and Mikey manged to capture all of his before anyone else. He could just feel the flash backs to the Battle Nexus showing before his vision. Great that was going to be something to look forward too, man he is for sure staying with Casey tonight after this. "Though somehow I 'hink this turned into more for Mikey than either of youes." Raph points out.

Which took him back to his reasoning of sitting beside her now, away from everyone else, he knows they all had a gift to give for the baby coming. They were sure of the gender yet but a baby still needed anything they could offer. Or in some cases make. It was a sort of secret and not a secret. In that no one under any circumstances was to ever mention the fact that Raphael knew how to knit. But it wasn't like no one knew about him able to do so. Splinter had had him take up the habit in an effort to help Raphael with that ever burning flame the fueled his temper. And he found comfort in the repeated action. Splinter was the first to ever receive a gift made by Raph. And slowly everyone did. Sure it wasn't really for Von but thats how these worked the gift was to the mother for the baby. Von was just much more a risky gamble because she liked to push that whole deal when it came to fact about Raphael.

He still grabbed at the gift bag and held it out in front of her. Looking far off to the side not even towards the party, selecting a random brick in the wall to focus his gaze on to. "yeah I know were doin' gifts at the end but 'm gonna try ditch soon as I can. So wanna make sure you get 'his is all."

Raphael expresses only turning to face her again when he felt the weight of the bag leave his own hand. Slightly peering over to watch her look into the paper shopping bag, Peering in and it was clear to see right away that there was a purple knitted blanket in there. Bands of two shades purple and near the top right corner was a small fish done in a even dark shade of color. It was clear this had taken longer and more time to make compared to most of the other knitted gifts Raphael had ever given. Sort of outing a few more thing about this little hobby of the rough and gruff turtle. It was thanks to some help, outside help from a Ms. Morrison that he may have learned a bit more he could do.

Raphael wouldn't explain it but he did put a lot of thought into the look of the blanket he know both Don and Von had a liking for the color purple so course it was going to be those similar shades they both wore. The fish in their own shade of purple. Part of him wanted to try and make it look like the usual silhouette look of Ariel from the move Don just loved to death. But it had proved to be too hard for him to really do at the time. Besides? who was to say their kid would also like the movie? Pretty sure they would one way or another actually. So a fish seemed fitting in the end. Von like to sit out by the docks same as Raph after all and it tied back to the sea that Donnie loved and wanted to explore the depths of. Raphael felt it worked. And made sense and glared a dagger at Casey every time he sat down to work on it at the apartment. Or when he tried to ask for his partners thought about it because of how much thought he was expressing was going in towards the creation.

"I see that look on your face Von." Not really she was on his right side after all but he didn't need to be actively looking at her to know she was in fact making some sort of expression that would likely annoy him right now. "Kid needs a blanket 'ight? well should get a new one and not 'ike we can really come by that so easy." Okay sure Casey or April could help with that but then it was more a gift from Casey or April and not Raphael. Which is why he opted to making one himself. After all he knew how to do it.

Raphael finally sighs and givens in feeling better to get it over with as he twists a little to better face her. "What?" He says it like a warning, it was pointless Von was never really deterred but the tough act. Didn't stop the red banded turtle from giving it though. Even if he knew she wouldn't be thrown off by it. "Get it over wit' ya ya Raph made a blanket for the baby whatever ain't a big deal." He says doing his best to keep to his act. "Knew I shoulda jus' left with out givin' it to you personally." yeah right he wanted it know he had done it even if it meant dealing with this now.

[slow-button-off]

I'm ignoring the disqualification and just want to get into the strategy. I really don't get it. There's a few things that I've been thinking of:

1. Like okay fine, their simulations showed that a one stop would be similar to a 2 stop, but what kind of data are you collecting when you have data from the sprint that shows how much more your tyres fell off compared to everyone. Did they think that somehow they'd magically be able to change something between Saturday and Sunday even though they were under parc ferme. They're usually so cautious and sometimes this season have been TOO conservative with their tyres out of fear of excessive deg, so then why now would they think that they could pull this off knowing the track characteristics and the weakness of their car. And this leads me into another point:

2. Do you think they realize that a major weakness for them is that they can't think on the fly and adapt to changing situations. We've seen this so many times - rain suddenly comes and they panic, safety car comes out and they don't know what to do. They saw that the strategy wasn't working like merc and mclaren but instead of adjusting and reassessing, they just pushed through. Why do they keep following what their data says and not what's actually happening on track. The same as Hungary 2022 where it was clear that the hard tyre wasn't the right choice, but no, our computer tells us it's what we should do so we won't follow what we see happening in front of us on track, we'll follow our data. This is something that they really need to work on because it affects so many races - usually on charles side of course. There's obviously something flawed with their simulation model. Why are they the only team that shows weird things like this. Why are they the only team that expects rain when there isn't rain (Brazil 2022), why are their numbers so often wrong. Surely by now you'd figure that they need to make changes to their systems.

3. My last point is what was the point of it?? Like yes, your data showed that a one stop is a possibility, but no matter which way you looked at it, that wouldn't have been the preferred method. So why would you decide to go that way and make life difficult for your driver when you could do what everyone else was doing and end up with the same position. From what I can recall from the race, it's not like he would've gained anything from doing the one stop. If he did the 2 stop, he wasnt losing any positions. It's not like it was a turkey 2021 situation where they were no where and could try something strange because they had nothing to lose. I don't get why they needed to take a gamble - because thats what it was, a gamble. Even if the simulations showed that it was possible, it was still a risky move. So I just don't get why they decided to go that route. And I won't even get started on why they thought to try the alternate strategy with the lead car, because then I'd have to fly to maranello to burn the place down.

It just worries me so much that things will continue like this even when they get a competitive car and in the end nothing will change

The data collection itself is probably fine but they can't extrapolate it at all.

I think they know. What Fred said makes me think that they know. But they're gonna need to actually go ahead and fix it. But that's also easier when you have good numbers in the background.

[nicomrade]

Hello local Akagi and Sahara enthusiast! What do you think those two would think about each other? Would Akagi be impressed by Sahara's begging to be in a dangerous gamble?

took forever to get to this one cuz i cant make up my mind. so lets start easy i suppose

i dont think akagi would be... impressed by it but i tihnk he might respect it? at least an older akagi does respect it- hiro did some similar begging to be part of the east/west tournament and akagi enjoyed that. a younger akagi only looks at other people to tell if they can be "an existence like his" and doesnt care much beyond that. sahara IS willing to take risks and stick to his death gambling decisions so that 19kagi does respect id say? (if his conversation w urabe is anything to go on- he dislikes/d half-assed people) he wouldnt feel NEGATIVELY towards sahara anyway. but who does akagi even truly dislike ?... only time he gets mad is in the chohan arc so. hes a pretty easy going dude all things considered

sahara-wise i think hes got a bit of an ego and overestimates how really good at gambles he is/would be lol. like "please let me in ur death game and i promise ill win and i wont die and u wont have my death on ur conscience i promiiiiise ill win i can win id win anything" is kinda like erm. u dont even know what game itd be yet. and hes one of the first people to actually step on the brave mans road (if not the first? i forgor) so he has an outlook of "ok i can pull that off" and i think hed be impressed w akagi skills but not see him as a demonic gambler or anything hed hear about akagis risky wins and think "wow! so cool! i could pull that too!". but akagis drive towards death and destruction he wouldnt vibe with and maybe thats what hes scared of akagi for. the suicidal drive of it all. that sahara doesnt have he just doesnt wanna have to work a job hes in it for the money (which akagi has no interest in) like he wouldnt get why akagi doesnt care about money & isnt happy despite always winning really ("wdym losing is healthy? losing sucks. if i could, id never lose. this guys an idiot lol." <- sahara internal thoughttrack)

so i guess put together.... theyre both a bit puzzled with each other but feel generally positively towards each other? also sahara DOES die at the peak of his gamble and thats the one thing (19) akagi desired so maybe hed be a bit jealous of that. but then saharas dead so they cant interact

sahara also has social skills that akagi doesnt have... hes like if osamu was kinda fucked up. like sahara would maybe make himeslf look like easy pickings so he can scam his colleagues and then akagi walks in and wins his bets before sahara can pull his scheme.? vs osamu just being straight forwardly picked on by his colleagues lol. sahara would similarly stick to akagi and follow him around if they met in those circumstances i think. but less in a "i admire you and want to learn from you" way and maybe more "let me eat off of ur scraps"

or saharas kaijis friend that akagi meets once and he just invites himself in akagis life and hangs around him. idk if hed be interested in playing akagi tho? saharas really just in it for the money lol idk that he enjoys games really. but they could be game buddies still thatd be fun even if not necessarily in-character

[keefechambers]

I would like the stranger things fandom to stop acting like murray is gonna out his best friend's closeted child, like bro.

[draggingthedregs]

Hello! I love your writing so much! Can you write some kanej with Kaz being protective of Inej? If not that’s completely fine :) thank u!

a/n: okay so I always really struggle with “protective Kaz” things because I feel like he knows that she can most definitely take care of herself and he respects her for that. So this is what I came up with to try and meet in the middle. There’s that scene in Six of Crows where Kaz sends Inej to get rid of Rojakke (is that how you spell it? Idk he was in one scene, his name is not the point) and then when they’re back in his office that night he asks like “Did he put up a fight?” and she says “Nothing I couldn’t handle” and he says “Not what I asked” so thats where the idea for this came from, thank you bye. 

word count: 2634

There was something about the floor of the Crow Club that set Kaz at ease.

Its endless cacophony of coins bouncing from table to floor, the spinning of Makkers Wheel, the laughter floating onto the street, and, his personal favorite, the flipping that only accompanied a deck of cards. Somedays he thought he’d be content to shuffle at a table forever.

It was then that Inej pushed through the entryway, shaking off the rain that rarely ceased to pour over the crowded city. She pulled her hood down, her inky hair braided into a long rope laying against her shoulder. Kaz traced every inch of her, as he often did when she entered a room: the slope of her nose, the smile she flashed to the greetings shouted in her direction, the knives strapped to her hips. He tried to ignore the voice in the back of his head that reminded him he’d also be content to be with her forever.

There were times he hated the things that he would notice, hated how his brain slipped past the innocent intention of watching to a sinister place of touch and consequence. He flipped the thoughts over in his head, studying them from every angle like he would a card trick, trying to mold them into different pictures. But the images froze in place anyway; the feel of her skin against his burned like fire, even in an illusion.

Most of all, he hated that he couldn’t force these delusions into reality, couldn’t touch her how he wanted, couldn’t force the bile down and only feel Inej’s warmth.  

As she approached him, nodding to the private game rooms at the back of the club, giving him a clear view of her, he saw that something was amiss. Scarlet bloomed through her vest and onto her sleeve, trailing down to her thigh. He followed her, shutting the heavy door behind them and turning its complex series of locks. She’s upright. That’s all you should care about. 

“The Exchange was crawling with Stadwatch. Security must be tight since the incident.” 

“Did they see you?”

Inej practically scoffed, leaning her weight against the wooden table. “No. But I’m sure they’ll find someone who fits their bill. You know as well as I do, the council will want this quieted soon.”

Kaz nodded. Two weeks ago, the Exchange had been robbed, and though it was never publicly released, Kaz knew exactly what was stolen. After all, he had all the stocks and shipment papers locked in his safe as they spoke. 

Roeder had been the one to pull off the job originally, this being one of the few things Kaz had required a spider for while she was busy at sea. He had done a mediocre job, but he was sloppy with locks and leaving the place as he’d found it. Going back to the scene of the crime seemed too risky a gamble but when Inej returned, she knew she could scrape it. And Kaz wasn’t going to start doubting the Wraith’s abilities now. 

He flipped through the file she handed him. To anyone else, it may have looked useless, just pages and pages of numbers and times, scratchy handwritten tables filled with nonsense. But to him, and to a mercher with half a whit, this was key to investing. With the talleys and dates in hand, he would know what shipments to bank on and where to place his shares for the next few months. 

“As always, the Wraith pulls through.”

Inej nodded and pulled her hood up once more. “You’re welcome.”

Kaz gave her another once over, slower than intended. “What happened?” He blurted, his voice sounding like a low growl in his throat.  

Inej looked down at herself, brows knitted, studying the blood on her trousers. “Bullet or two from a guard just shooting at shadows.” With her brief summary of events, she took her weight off the table, readying herself for the journey back into the wet.

Kaz felt a sinking in his chest at the thought of her walking away from him, even if it was just to her apartment, and he hated himself for it. Now especially with her covered in blood, he couldn’t stomach the thought of her leaving. Without meaning to, he had taken himself back to before she had left.

It had been Inej’s last night before heading to sea when they had tried to pretend they were normal, that there wasn’t still so much between them. Kaz sat next to her on his bed, bad leg out in front of him, avoiding her gaze. 

“We don’t have to do this at all.”

But he did. Kaz had to prove that he had come further than this. I can best this… 

When she set sail the next morning, the feeling of failure settled deep within him, right beside the feeling that this time, he may never get her back from the sea. 

Now, he couldn’t help but stop her. “Inej-” he began. 

She turned, her hand resting on the doors heavy handle.

He made up the steps between them to stand beside her. Kaz forced himself to give any semblance of explanation, knowing that he’d promised to give her what she deserved and knowing that he was currently failing. “Let me walk with you.”

Inej nodded, dropping her hand as Kaz unlocked the door and opened it for her. He felt awkward, and quite frankly stupid; opening it as if she was some pretty girl that couldn’t handle the difference between whether to push or pull. She strided through anyway and he followed, silently cursing himself and hoping the grimace on his face looked normal for his temperament. Once they’d made it to the street, she slowed to walk beside him. 

At first, neither of them spoke. Then, in her gentle and hushed tone, perhaps to avoid his inevitable questions about her evening, “Am I getting a personal escort through the Barrel?”

Kaz needn’t look down to feel the smile in her voice. “Is that what you’d prefer to call it?”

“It isn’t exactly an evening stroll down the canal, is it?”

“I suppose not.” He cringed at the sound of his own rasp, smashing against the lift of her voice like waves against stone. Though from what he could tell, she didn’t do the same. Inej only shrugged, tugging her hood forward against the drizzle. 

“I only meant that I should feel lucky to get the King of the Barrel to myself for the night.”

Kaz thought he might keel over. “I am a busy man, but I still find time to survey my kingdom.”

Inej only rolled her eyes and kept her gaze straight forward. A moment of silence nestled between them, leaving only the sound off the East Stave hanging in the air. After fighting with himself for what seemed like far too long, his gaze settled atop her.

“Yes?”

Kaz swallowed hard, “Did you miss Ketterdam?” Did you miss me? 

She considered his question, and to him, the silence stretched through the air like a rubber band about to break. 

“I did. More than I thought I would.” Inej finally relented. Her voice had drifted to a somber place, a quiet stillness replacing the humor she’d had minutes before. 

They had turned down a back alley, the darkness consuming them in sore contrast to the dazzling lights of the Stave. Their footsteps echoed in a syncopated rhythm, his awkward gait and cane paired with her near-soundless steps. 

Maybe it was the high of having her back, walking next to him through Ketterdam as they’d done so many times before, but he hadn’t realized the direction they’d been walking. They approached the Slat, its crooked frame jutting out from the foundation at a welcoming tilt. He glanced down to Inej once more, watching as she took in the building, trying to see it through her eyes, as he wished to see much of the world. 

“Is the Captain afraid of her old nest?”

If he had intended it as a jab, she didn’t take it as such. Inej shook her head once, “It just feels like home…” 

She moved before he did, taking a deep breath of the stale air inside as she stepped through the threshold. There was movement, as there always was, but the Slat was quiet this time of night and Kaz was thankful. It meant that, selfishly, he could keep Inej upstairs and to himself for as long as he could come up with things to talk about. Perhaps they’d even sit on his bed and she would allow him to make up for the last time they’d found themselves there. 

Kaz marveled at her as she took the creaky stairs ahead of him, the steps creaking beneath his weight after seemingly not registering her. His eyes once again wandered to the blood stains that covered her. He felt a hair-pin trigger go off in his chest and suddenly, there was anger. 

Stop that. She isn’t yours to save. 

Inej waited for him to open the door, sidestepping as they both now stood on the landing. If Kaz hadn’t just been studying her, he might have missed her change in demeanor and the way she shifted her weight to the wall behind her.  

“Inej.”

“Hm?”

Kaz attempted to even his tone. “How bad are they?” 

“What?”

His voice sounded like stones grinding against one another, “The bullet wounds.”

She shrugged but he could see the stress of the evening in her features. Her limbs seemed heavy and her eyelids fought to open with every blink. With a shove, Kaz unlocked his office door, forcing the warped wood open and, without hesitation, Inej followed him in, taking in the room as she clicked the locks back into place.

He leaned his cane against the makeshift desk and shucked his gloves off as he approached the cabinet beneath his wash basin, digging through its drawers for gauze and shears. Behind him, he heard the familiar creak of his window opening. The smell of rain against the cobblestones wafted toward him. 

“Your window seat has felt neglected. Your crows too.”

“Does that mean you stopped feeding them while I was gone?”

No. They reminded me of you. I couldn’t let another piece of you go. “They’re scavengers. I’m sure they managed.”

It was then that Kaz turned to see her standing by his bed. Inej looked up, her cheeks flushing red like she’d been caught doing something she shouldn’t have been. He only walked over, setting the bandages on the thin mattress. “So I don’t have to find a heartrender for you.”

“They really aren’t that bad-”

“You’ve bled through your clothes. They’re bad enough.”

Inej cleared her throat as she began removing layers of knives and clothes. Kaz’s eyes roved over her, the pounding in his chest growing louder. He hated it. 

 Her arms and shoulders were covered in fresh scars, some of them still red and scabbed, and the bruises on her ribs were still deep purple. 

“Slavers don’t give up their cargo easily.” Inej’s voice came out with caution, as if she was waiting to see his reaction. 

His gaze met hers, voice carving into the air like a rusted blade. “Where are they all now?”

“Dead.”

A sense of pride cracked through him as a rare smile settled on his lips. Kaz nodded. “Good.” 

She picked up a strip of bandage, wrapping it around the bullet wound on her bicep, silence filling the space between them. Inej didn’t need to look up to feel the weight of his eyes on her. A flush crept to the tops of her ears. “I didn’t want you to see.”

It was rare for Kaz Brekker to be confused and yet, here he was. 

“I thought you might kill someone. Or start to doubt that I could handle myself.”

“I could never doubt you. Only a fool would.” It was only after he said it that he realized it had been aloud. 

Inej tied off the bandage then glanced down to the blood on her pants.  

“I can-”

“No.” She said, finally making eye contact with him again. “Stay.”

For his sake and hers, Kaz turned his head to avoid staring as she shimmied out of the bloodied fabric. 

She sat on the edge of the bed and poked around for any bullet fragments, the muscles in her thigh tensing, the dried blood on her skin looking black. Inej was just as strong as ever; all her limbs built of corded muscle coated in the lithe grace of an acrobat, just as he remembered. Despite his better judgement, Kaz took a long look at her. 

It’s shame that eats men whole. He could feel it gnawing at him as he attempted to push away the image of her bare thighs against his sheets. 

“Kaz, can you-?” She nodded to the scissors, her hands stuck at an awkward angle around her leg, the apprehension on her face clear. 

He picked them up and took a deep breath before sitting down beside her. When he leaned over, he was careful not to touch her. Her breath stirred the hair on the back of his neck. One turn of his head and their lips would have been inches apart. This reminded him far too much of the hotel washroom; he only hoped it would end better. 

Kaz cut the bandage gently, taking the end from her and tying it, his knuckles grazing against her skin. Panic hit him before anything else, afraid he had overstepped. It took him a moment to realize there was no revulsion roiling through him. 

“Inej-”

“It’s alright… Thank you.”

He nodded, grabbing what was left of the bandages and the shears and placing them on top of his dresser. Then he opened one of his drawers, rummaging through the mess of clothes until he found what he had been looking for. 

Kaz handed her a pair of cotton sleep trousers. “I can’t imagine yours are salvageable.”

Inej smiled, sliding them over her legs. They were huge on her. And though they hadn’t discussed her sleeping arrangements for the evening, it appeared she would be staying there. 

He sat back down, staring at his bare hands; the hands that had just graced her without trouble or hesitation. She reached over, threading her fingers through his, and studied him, watching for the shift. But it never came. 

“Will you lay with me?”

At that, he looked up. 

In front of him was a girl who deserved so much more than Dirtyhands. A girl who made the sea cower and made the sun look dull. A girl who could have done anything she wished in life with ease and grace. And yet- she was sat in his bed, holding his hand, and patiently waiting for the semblances of affection he could provide. 

Kaz felt himself nod. 

She pushed herself back until she was against the wooden headboard. They both moved slowly, carefully placing their limbs so there was no overlap. 

Then, he was laying beside her; both of their heads turned to study each other.

“Thank you.” Inej’s voice nearly a whisper. 

The minutes stretched into hours, and Kaz lay listening to her breathing. I will have you without armor. 

Well after twelve bells, the cadence of sleep seemed to grab hold of him, weighing heavy on his body. As his eyes drifted shut, he hoped that there would be more nights like this: nights with Inej close by his side and stillness in his mind. 

He reached for her hand in the dark and promised he would not let go come morning. He would never let go of her again. 

[luckhissoul]

psychology + mental health deep dive !

general mental health related trigger warnings apply.  feel free to include more or exclude those facts / test results that take too much time or don’t apply, you can check out this list for more personality-related quizzes to include!

QUICK FACTS ,

diagnoses: n/a - not sure if he’d have anything considered professionally diagnosed as an mental illness.  i’d say he has some form of ptsd and an addictive personality ( gambling, drinking, sex, dangerous situations ) , which my two minute ( so correct me if i’m wrong ) google research told me that those are considered more disorders and not a mental illness.  triggers: n/a - although it’d take a certain level of trust for him not to get mad or low key freak if someone touches his throat. he keeps it covered though.  positive coping skills: naming the stars, spending time with olver (his boy his child *wipes tears* ), spending time alone ( is this a good coping mechanism or a bad one ? ) negative coping skills: drinking, gambling, casual sex, recklessness, there was a knife fight or two, spending time alone ( tossing this on the negative, too ) , making jokes about it, denial. attachment style: Disorganized / Fearful-Avoidant love language: physical touch myers briggs / mbti: ESTP-T

HISTORY EXPLORATION ,

are their diagnoses formal ( via a doctor, therapist, etc. ) or informal ( self diagnosis, a hunch, unrealized, etc. ) n/a - but i’d say any sort of thing that he does have would be unrealized.

have they ever been treated / medicated? no

have they ever been hospitalized or treated on an inpatient basis? no

how old were they when they first started experiencing / realizing symptoms? experiencing early 20s / realizing ? never. 

do they have a family history of mental illness? no

how was mental health handled / discussed in the family? no

what are their thoughts on mental health / their diagnosis? he wouldn’t have any ? 

in what ways has their diagnosis shaped their life or experiences? subtly, in a way he doesn’t notice. 

SYMPTOMS: note that all of the below are, on their own, normative and typical aspects of human functioning. they become “symptoms” when they last longer than “normal” or when they pose a significant impact on someone’s life / functioning.

BOLD  all that are present,  ITALICIZE  those that are resolved or in the history.

depression.    anxiety.    panic attacks.    dissociation.    derealization.    depersonalization.    suicidal ideation.    self harm.    homicidal ideation.    psychosis.    auditory hallucinations.    visual hallucinations.    delusions.    mania.    hypomania.    racing thoughts.    hyperactivity.    attention difficulty.    flashbacks.    nightmares.    hyperarousal.    hypoarousal.    hypersexuality.    hyposexuality.    psychopathy.  risky behavior.    catatonia.    somatic / bodily concerns.    mutism.    phobia.    agoraphobia.    hoarding.    obsessions.    compulsions.    body dysmorphia.    hair picking.    skin picking.     amnesia.    illness anxiety / hypochondria.    sensory loss.    speech difficulty.    comprehension difficulty.    communication difficulty.    tics.   defiant behavior.    irritable mood.    vindictiveness.     aggression.   pyromania.    kleptomania.    paranoia.    attention seeking.    narcissism.    avoidance.    dependency.    pica.    rumination.    food restriction.    food binging.    purging.    soiling the bed.    insomnia.    fatigue.    sexual dysfunction.    delirium.    developmental delays.

explanations / elaborations on any of the above symptoms: suicidal - was very brief period of a few months. hyperactivity is a constant. flashbacks are a mix of his own experiences and memories that aren’t his, like remembering literally dying dozens of times. nightmares - not nightly. low key hypersexuality - mostly just having fun but there’s a line or two where he’s i’m so sad now i’m going to get a woman and thats just -- compulsive gambling / drinking / casual sex. amnesia - he’s missing pieces of his memories, a lot of his childhood is just blurred. defiant behavior - constantly rebelling, would always do something to defy authority.  attention seeking - flashy, wants to stand out, likes to be noticed - guess it makes him feel seen in a way. avoidance - will avoid confronting literally everything he feels so. good or bad for the most part. 

tagged by: @caracarnn​ tagging : @ofimaginarybeings / @inprometheanfire​​ / 

[ironicapparently]

AU Where some of DICE key members are the elite, powerful and rich students of Hopes Peak, such as Byakuya, Mondo, etc.

DICE is as said by Kokichi, a powerful organisation that can manipulate the world with a ring of a phone and with over 10,000 members. Started between the parents of the students but passed down to the actual kids because

A) If any sketchy business was caught between the Yakuza and The Togamis, it could alert people to sketchy business practices and such.

B) Not only would the adults be able to avoid suspicion but can guarantee a place at Hopes Peak Academy, a place where they could meet without suspicion and to have a secure future with bonds with other minor people that could be useful (like somewith a Talent like SHL Adviser).

C) DICE has a front of being a Prank Squad that pranks for fun or for hire and since if kids meet up to prank and act like Kids, that wouldn’t be to suspicion either and if attracts media attention it will have substitutes for the actual 10 Key Members (they are apart of Dice but a separate section).

Members would be:

Chihiro: Hear me out, he, in his own way, is probably one of the smartest and powerful people in Hopes Peak/World.

The man made an AI that is like an actual human with emotions and such, able to replicate human emotions (becoming Mondo), made the AI world and hacked into Hopes Peak’s files (probably a really secure place). This would be really useful, plus who would expect Chihiro to be apart of DICE, making him a good source of information for things around Hopes Peak.

Byakuya Togami: He is considered by ultimate standards to be special (which seems like a very hard feat) and is to inherit the a large company (worth billions probably). Excellent resources for a group like DICE.

He also hates boring things (seen in 1-2), so he would have a reason to want to join in on something petty or spread chaos. He also wouldn’t be suspected to be apart of DICE due to his attitude of being stuck up and having a low tolerance of people in general.

Kokichi Ouma: The leader of DICE and Ultimate Supreme Leader, there is obviously a reason he was chosen for this title and what better reason than to be the head of 10 of the most powerful people in Japan.

Since DICE is described as a Prank Squad of 10 misfits, people wouldn’t really think much behind weird things being attributed to the actual DICE (Powerful People) but the made up one.

Mondo Owada: (Since this is an AU, his brother gave him the title) He is the leader of Crazy Diamond, the biggest biker gang in Japan. This type of power can be useful for manipulating more lower class people to stay in line and can be good for intimidation tactics.

To be honest, if you heard Mondo was apart of DICE with Chihiro, you would probably laugh because the guy seems so serious and angry to be apart of a prank squad.

Celestia Ludenburg: Her ability to gamble could be used for a lot of useful things like she would need to understand probability and risk to Gamble in a way that won’t risk her, put on an act to appear whatever way she needs it to be in her favour and a good grasp on reading people.

This can come in handy with negotiation and such to make sure they have the upper hand in the deal, just intimidate people into giving information if needed, invest money into different stock safely or take the risky move and straight up gamble so actually money to increase their budget if needed.

She, like Byakuya, wouldn’t seems to be apart of a “prank squad” due to her style of clothing (impractical if you want to prank) and her act of being better than everyone.

“Imposter” Ryota : His ability to become anyone and not be doubted is a skill that would be valued in a company like DICE, his ability is probably the most useful for when it comes to spying on famous people in the world by pretending to be a family member or such.

Since he is currently being the ultimate Animator, he would seem unimportant to a prank squad like DICE and seems too serious about himself and his animation to do something like that.

Fuyuhiko Kuzuryu: Is apart of the Yakuza, a power group of people that could probably take care of any illegal activity needed, he is capable of self defence and intimidation.

He just doesn’t seem like someone who would be able to tolerate Kokichi and also doesn’t tolerate Kokichi that much.

Nagito Komaeda: Canonically, he is actual quite rich but is never mentioned on what his parents actually did. Though it can be implied that they were rich/important due to him getting kidnapped and held for ransom but are on the more quite type or not well known due to the kidnapper not knowing he had no remaining family to pay it off.

His luck can be a useful asset for risky plans and due to his luck keeping him alive no matter what it can probably minimise any death threating senecios. He is also seen to be good at planning,preparing due to his luck and his ideas and ability to find dangerous items (bombs, guns) .

Since he treats all ultimates the same, it can’t be seen that treats Kokichi or anybody better than the rest, but everyone in DICE are fully capable to treat Nagito like how everyone else does, if they want to or not.

Rantaro Amami: As the Ultimate Adventurer, he probably has made connections to different places around the world and is probably the only person in DICE to make an accurate map beside from 3 others. Due to his navigation skills, he can navigate around Hopes Peak without bumping into anyone using different passages (secret and non-secret) to evade and student or guards.

He treats everyone the same and is honestly seems way to chill to be bothered to prank people.

Key Note: He also the well needed Dad of Dice.

Kirumi Tojo: She is literally a maid that can do anything and is the secret Prime Minister of Japan, probably one of the most needed members to DICE due to her ability to do anything needed.

She acts too like a mom to be apart of DICE.

Key Note: She is the well needed Mom of Dice.

Dice was probably a group of pranksters till he was persuaded to be used for the connections between each family and corporations to avoid any suspicion from the media and that’s how it was created.

HONOURABLE MENTIONS:

PEKO PEKOYAMA FOR BEING STRONG AND CLOSE TO FUYUHIKO

GONTA GOKUHARU FOR BEING A STRONG MAN AND THE FACT HE PROBABLY KNOWS HOW TO POISON PEOPLE BECAUSE OF BUGS AND KNOWING OF THE ARE POISONOUS OR NOT AND BEING ABLE TO SMELL POISON SOMEHOW.

ISHIMARU ONLY BECAUSE HE SLIGHTLY KNOWS ABOUT DICE DUE TO MONDO AND CHIHIRO BUT THATS IT.

That’s it for now but yeah hope this is fine.

[pinkbutterfly84]

Quintis Text Conversations pt 2

1.10 Risky Buisness

T - Hey Happy how did your date go last night?

H - What's it got to do with you?

T - ah come on Hap I'm just asking as a friend?

H - you know i don't talk about my personal life

T - I know but this is what friend's do to get to know each other, as questions about what they have done

H - what did you do last night?

T - OK ill tell you then you tell me

H - deal

T - ok I stayed at home, went on the online poker room win £500 and thought about what you were up too

H - gambling thats what you do every evening?

T - not every evening not anymore no, just when I got something on my mind

T - your turn now

H - fine

H - if you must know i didn't go, backed out the last minute

T - why?

H - dunno didn't feel right, so spent the night taking apart a boat engine I picked up at the scrap yard

T - see that wasn't so hard. Perhaps tomorrow we could go to Kavalskis after work and talk about our days

H - don't push it Doc. This is new for me this whole friendship thing never really had any friends

T - what none

H - no when you don't stay anywhere for more than a few weeks or months there is no point.

T - what about the team?

H - I mean Walt and Sly are cool but I wouldn't tell them every thought and feeling

T - you need friends Hap, people to lean on, who are there for you when you need them. You know i care for you and will always be here when you ready to open up more

H - listen Doc its late, let's table this for another day

T - alright Hap, goodnight sleep tight

H ' night doc

1.11 - Talismans

T - Hey Hap, how's your ankle?

H - yes Doc im fine doing everything you told me to do

T - that will be a first

H - its not often you give me good advice

T - you were pretty amazing out there today Hap, but back to our conversation you don't need to put on your armour around me I won't hurt you

H - looks like we both have a past to deal with, I'm sorry i never asked about your parents must of been pretty tough growing up

T - it wasn't easy Hap that's why I became a doctor to help my mom but she never wanted my help left me to fend for myself wont accept any treatment. I send her money best i can do

H - what about your dad?

T - that waste of space gambled all our money away and left us when i was at college not seen or heard from him since

H - dont you want to find him?

T - no, he knows where mom is so he could get in touch if he wanted too

H - why did you push me to find my dad then?

T - you don't know anything about your dad, he could have reasons you don't know about. You deserve answers Happy

H - if your dad was a gambler why do you gamble?

T - thats the millon dollar question, I started as a way to spend time with my dad when I was much younger, then he realised I could win him money so he used me. When I figured this out I made mistakes on purpose and that got him really mad and that's when he eventually took off then I gambled to get food for mom and me. Eventually became addicted to the high. Now I gamble as a way to forget aftercare bad day go into a zone but its becoming less frequent

H - you can always talk to me instead

T - ah Hap you getting to grips with this friend business!

H - do you have to be so sarcastic all the time. I'm off to bed now night Doc

T - night Happy sweet dreams

I found these harder to find a flow with so sorry they are not so good. Next lot should be better 🤞

[thetravelerwrites]

Johnny (Cowboy Minotaur) Pt. 2

Rating: Lemon Relationship: Male Human/Male Minotaur Additional Tags: Exophilia, Reader-Insert, Monster Lover, Interspecies Relationship, Male Reader, Male Monster, Gay Reader, Gay Monster, Post Gold Rush, 1860's California, Cowboys, Cowboy Minotaur Content Warnings: Gun Violence, Gay Sex, Anal Sex, Handcuff Bondage, Cumflation Words: 3798

The conclusion to @severedreamerbeard ‘s commission! Randall puts pressure on Johnny, so the reader decides to do something about it, only to be injured while protecting Johnny. Please reblog and leave feedback!

The Traveler's Masterlist

The next few weeks were unremarkable. The town was small and most folks were mild-mannered. The only place that seemed to have any trouble was the saloon, and Bláithín was more than capable of handling most scrapes that went on there herself. She came in to the jailhouse once or twice, dragging an unconscious drunk behind her while you and Johnny were playing blackjack for peanuts and pennies.

You and Johnny often ate your meals at the saloon, though Uncle George invited you, Johnny, and Judge Jones over for dinner once a week. He liked to cook, but in such a small town, he rarely had anyone to cook for.

All through this time, you’re trying not to think about whether or not Johnny was like you. If you told him and he wasn’t, he could arrest you and send you to the Sacramento big house for indecency. And if he was… what? You had to admit to yourself that you liked him rather much, but it wasn’t as if you could have any sort of relationship with him that was anything more than professional. In the city, people didn’t care about other people, but in small towns, people talked. You knew if you gave in and he reciprocated, people would talk. Johnny hadn’t been here much longer than you, but the people of Redington already respected and admired him. You didn’t want to strip him of his job, home, and dignity because you had feelings.

One afternoon, as you and Johnny were talking with Bláithín about her recent stolen packages, Randall came into the saloon followed his entire entourage, with Lloyd at his left elbow. The entire room went silent and a few of the bar’s patrons hastily threw down money and left. Bláithín stood as straight as her packhorse body would allow and both you and Johnny stiffened.

“Relax,” Randall said, holding up his hands in placation. “We ain’t here to start trouble. We just want some grub and a drink. That against the law now?”

“Bláithín?” Johnny asked.

“I haven’t ever officially barred them from entering, and as long as their payin’, I suppose there’s no harm,” She said slowly.

“Maybe we’ll stick around for a bit,” Johnny told her in an undertone.

“I’d appreciate that, sheriff,” She replied.

The boys settled around the saloon, ordering food and drink and being rowdy, but not so much that it would require tossing them out.

“Hey, sheriff!” Randall shouted over his buddies. He’d been watching the two of us whisper to each other. “You done breakin’ in that new deputy? Workin’ him hard, I bet.”

Johnny snorted, but you said in a whisper, “They want to rile you up. Don’t rise to the bait.”

Lloyd piped up next. “Yeah, I bet he’s so sore from his ‘job’ that he can’t hardly sit down.”

His men laughed uproariously.

“Johnny,” You asked him as you felt him getting more and more tense next to you. “We both know they’re criminals. Why haven’t they been run off or arrested before now?”

Johnny huffed in exasperation. “They’re careful about it. They do most of their… work… outside of the town limits, which means it’s outside of my jurisdiction. What happens out in the desert beyond the town’s boundaries is fair game. There’s no witnesses, so there’s no crime. My hands are tied unless they do something illegal within the town’s borders.”

“What would be enough to get them sent away for good?”

“Burglary, robbery… nothin’ good,” He said, eyeing the group as they howled with laughter.

You thought about what Johnny had said when you first got to town: He loves any chance to prove he’s the biggest swingin’ dick on this side of the tracks. “What about assault on a lawman?” You asked on a low voice.

Johnny frowned. “What’re you--”

“You know, Randall,” You said loudly, pushing yourself off of where you’d been leaning on the bar and advanced slowly. “You want to know what I think? Why you like pokin’ at Johnny so much?”

“Oh, do enlighten me,” Randall said in an amused tone.

“You’re jealous,” You told him simply. “Johnny’s got everything you want. Respect, money, integrity…” You looked Randall up and down. “Height. Looks. Brains. A backbone.”

Randall’s smile changed to a scowl in half a heartbeat. “That prissy dickweed has nothing on me.”

“If you mean smell, you’re exactly right,” You said, holding your nose. “Are you like an actual cow and roll in your own dung? That’s the only reason I can think of that you’d smell so bad all the time.”

Randall stood so fast that his chair flew back. His entourage also shot to their feet, their hands going to their gun belts.

“You’re either as stupid as you look or tryin’ to get your ass beat,” Randall said.

“That’s fair, I do have a hitable face,” You said.

“Kid, stop it,” Johnny said, grabbing your arm.

“Gotta protect your little boy toy, don’t you sheriff?” Randall said, cackling.

“What’s a-matter, Randall?” I shot back. “Mad he won’t take you back?”

That’s what did it. Randall cracked you across the face. You were prepared for it, but he hit hard and you stumbled back into Johnny, who caught you and pushed you back onto your feet.

“That’s enough!” Johnny said. “Randall, you’re under arrest!”

“Like hell I am!” Randall said, drawing his gun. He pointed it right at Johnny.

“Look out!” You couldn’t push Johnny out of the way, he was too large. But you cold jump in front of him. The bullet was aimed at Johnny’s ribcage, but it managed to hit you squarely in the shoulder. It was enough to rattle the bones in your arm and you cried out in pain.

Johnny bellowed in rage and jumped into action, delivering a blow to Randall’s stomach that sent him sprawling, his gun skittering across the floor. Lloyd tried to retrieve it, but Bláithín stood there with her rifle, aimed at his head.

“Wouldn’t be doing that, if I were you, bucko,” She said. Two more of his gang rushed her, guns in hand, and she twirled with incredible agility and kicked them both hard in the knees. The snapping sound echoed throughout the saloon, and they went down screaming. The other four shot out of the saloon, into the street. Bláithín went out to follow them, but you stopped her.

“Leave ‘em,” You gasped, getting up off the floor, gun in hand. “They ain’t actually done anything. These four are the ones we want to worry about.”

Johnny was on the ground over Randall, pummeling him into the floorboards. You grabbed his arm as he was going down for another blow.

“He’s out, John!” You said. Johnny was breathing heavily and stared at you, his pupils pinpricks and hyperfocused, but he stopped and got up, breathing as though he’d run to the coast and back.

Bláithín was holding Lloyd at gunpoint. “These four inna going nowhere, John, but we need the surgeon. Run an’ get ‘im.”

Johnny stared at you for a moment longer, then obeyed.

Getting the bullet out of your shoulder was more painful than it going in, but there was no permanent damage. Johnny was at the other end of the infirmary, securing the other prisoners. He glanced back at you occasionally, as if making sure you were still there, although you were going to be in that bed for a day or two to make sure the wound didn’t open up or get an infection.

Uncle George and Judge Jones arrived shortly after, talking with Johnny in hushed tones. Jones and Johnny went off to another room while Uncle George came to sit on the cot next to you.

“That was a risky gamble, son,” He said, although he couldn’t bring himself to sound too annoyed at you.

“Ain’t this why you brought me out here?” You asked, a little woozy from the whiskey they’d made you drink before taking out the bullet. “To get rid of Randall?”

“Well, yeah, but I didn’t expect you to get yourself shot!” He said, his annoyance bubbling to the surface.

“He was aimin’ for Johnny,” You said seriously. “A gutshot in that big guy would have been fatal.”

“Hmph,” Uncle George said. “Well, you’re not staying here with these hooligans. You’ll be staying with me till you’re patched up. Johnny’s gonna have to make a trip to Sacramento to bring back deputies from the big house to transport Randall and his men back that way. He’ll be gone about two weeks.”

Your heart sank a little, but you kept your face neutral.

“What about the four of Randall’s crew that got away?” You asked.

“Scattered like cockroaches after their leader got caught,” George said. “Just as well. They hadn’t actually committed a crime, they were just present when a crime was committed. Perhaps now they’ll move on and pester someone else.”

“Hmm,” You hummed. “Will the town be alright without a sheriff? I mean, with Johnny gone and me laid up?”

“Bláithín’s takin’ up the reins, so to speak, until John returns. She’s a capable woman.”

“I believe that,” You said, laying back with a tired sigh. “I think I might get some shut-eye, Uncle, if’n thats alright?”

“Sure thing, son,” He said, standing. “Got some paperwork to do, as it is. You rest easy. I’ll have you moved to my house tomorrow morning.”

You fell into a sodden slumber, feeling heavy. Later, you were awoken in the dark by a gentle shake.

“Wake up, deputy,” You heard a gravelly voice say softly.

“Johnny?” You asked, groggy and unable to see much in the dark.

“Yeah, it’s me,” He said. “I’m leavin’ out tonight. I want to get there and back as quick as possible, but… I… I wanted to thank you. For takin’ that bullet for me.”

“I’d do it again, John,” You said, still half asleep. “I’d do it a thousand times.”

You closed your eyes again, and there was silence. Perhaps he thought you’d fallen asleep again. You felt his hand take yours and hold it, gently caressing the knuckles. Your heart thumped when he pressed a kiss to it, but when you opened your eyes, he had dropped you hand and you could hear him hurrying out of the building.

You’re uncle had said it would take two weeks for Johnny to get to Sacramento and back, but he managed the trip in half the time. He was dusty and looked a bit thinner; it looked like he’d barely taken a rest the whole time.

By the time he got back, you were on your feet again and had taken back the job of deputy from Bláithín, though your arm was still in a sling. She gratefully relinquished it, though the town had been quiet with the offenders finally caught and out of the way.

“Welcome back, sheriff,” You said brightly as he leapt off his horse.

“Thanks,” He said. “How you holdin’ up?”

“My arm’s still stickin’, so I’m all good,” You said, wiggling your arm in it’s sling.

Johnny nodded, satisfied. “The boys from Sacramento are about an hour behind me. They’re at the train station, getting a bite to eat.”

“Have you eaten?” You asked him. He shook his head. “Come on, then. I’m buyin’.”

“Nah, kid. You don’t pay for nothin’ when your with me anymore,” He said, smiling at you. It was the first actual, honest-to-god smile you’d ever seen on his face. It completely changed it, lighting it up and making him look…

You shook your head. Now wasn’t the time.

After you’d eaten, the deputies arrived. You followed Johnny into the jailhouse. As soon as Randall saw the deputies, he started screeching.

“They provoked me! Him especially!” He said, pointing at you.

One of the deputies banged the bars of the cell with his baton. “Hush up!”

“What about him then?” Randall asked, pointing at Johnny, his voice more menacing. “There are some things about him you’d probably like to know.”

“And how exactly do you know those things, Randall?” You asked him dangerously, getting in his face though the bars separated you. “How exactly do you know?”

Randall shut his mouth tight and glared at you.

“You said you had something to declare?” The prison deputy asked.

Randall’s jaw worked and he looked at you with pure venom.

“...no. No, I don’t.”

“Fine. Time to get moving,” the deputy said. Randall, Lloyd, and the other two of the gang were loaded into a barred paddy-wagon.

As they moved off, Johnny said, “Can’t say I’m sorry to see the back of ‘em.”

“You said it,” You said, massaging your shoulder a bit.

“Does it hurt?” He asked.

You shook your head. “Not much.”

He snorted. “Quit tryin’ to be a hard ass. When’s the last time the bandage was changed?”

“Couple days.”

“It’s due, then. Come on, I’ll take care of it,” he said, walking back to the jailhouse. You follow.

He sat you down at the table and got a box from the bunkhouse.

“Take off your shirt,” He said.

Your heart threw itself into your throat, but you complied, carefully pulling your arm out of it’s sling and tugging the sleeve off.

“Lay your arm on the table and get comfy,” He said, pulling out strips of cloth and some salve.

He was inches away from you, and you could smell him. He smelled earthy and reminded you of home. Comfy was the last place you could be right now. Your heart was hammering.

He carefully peeled the old bandage off and inspected the skin, checking for infection. He was gentle. You could feel his breath on your bare chest and it was all you could do to hold still and not reach out for him. He gently worked the salve into your skin without hurting you much and re-wrapped the wound.

“...uh…” He started diffidently. He was purposefully not looking you in the eye. “Thanks… for pipin’ up for me. I don’t know… what you know… or… but…”

“John,” You said seriously. “Look at me.”

He looked up, his face stern and closed, but his eyes showed his true self. You bent forward and kissed him. He pushed you back immediately. At first, you were scared you misjudged him, but he was looking at you wonderingly.

“You… you’re…”

You nodded. “I’ve been holdin’ back because I didn’t want to cause you trouble… but… God, Johnny…” You rushed forward again and kissed him, harder this time, and he didn’t pull away. If fact, he gripped you tightly, causing you to yelp in pain from your shoulder.

“Sorry, sorry!” He said, letting you go at once.

You shook your head. “No, I’m fine.” You got up and bolted the door of the jailhouse. “Is this alright?”

He nodded, breathing hard and standing. He unbuttoned his shirt and pulled it off as you unbuckled your belt one-handed.

“Are you sure?” Johnny asked, shedding clothes.

“Yes,” You said, pulling him down by the chin to kiss him again. His hands found your buttocks and lifted you so that your legs were wrapped around him. He swept off the desk and laid you down on your back, pulling your boots and trousers off. He reached over you, bending so that his body was flush with yours, and pulled open a draw on the desk. When he drew back, he was holding the bottle of oil that he used for sore muscles.

He put some on his fingers and rubbed it against your entrance, and you moaned. He worked the oil in while kissing you, eventually inserting one finger, then two, then three. His fingers weren’t exactly small, and the stretch felt amazing.

He moved you so that you were laying lengthways on the desk and reached back into the draw, pulling out a pair of handcuffs. He pushed the desk closer to the cell and took your hands, carefully lifting your arms up and cuffed them to the cell.

“Don’t move around too much,” He said as he climbed onto the desk between your legs. “Don’t want to reopen that wound.”

You nodded, breathless at the sight of him. His length had slipped out of it’s sheath and was standing at attention, brown and black like the rest of his body with a flat head. Johnny covered it in oil and rubbed it in,

“Ready?” He asked.

“It’s been a while,” You admitted. “I’m more than ready.”

“I can guarantee it’s been longer for me,” He said, chuckling, as he pushed himself slowly into you. You groaned with the sensation, your head falling back against the desk.

He took your knees in his hands and pushed them back against your chest and buried himself as deeply as he could go. Looking up, you saw a bulge in your belly were he had planted himself. He moaned as he slowly pulled back out and pushed in again, the bulge disappearing and reappearing with each thrust. Once he was confident he wasn’t hurting you, he sped up and you gasped. Your own member was bobbing and twitching against your stomach, and instead of grasping it, he reached underneath and rubbed his fingers over your sack, massaging the skin and making you cry out. You muted your noise, though, fearful that others would hear.

“Fuck,” He breathed, leaning forward on his hands and speeding up. You could feel him twitching inside you, and he had trapped your cock between your stomachs, so as he thrust, he was rubbing it between the two of you.

“Oh, God, Johnny,” You gasped. You could feel yourself getting close, the friction of his skin against your length and the feeling of him working his against the nerves inside you made you feel like you were going to explode. Your body tensed as you came, spraying against you and him as he continued to move at a frenetic pace. The tension caused a little bit of pain in your shoulder, but you barely noticed it.

He reared up and grasped your hips, ramming into you with a fierce intensity until he came as well, filling you so full that your belly pooched again with the sheer amount he released into you.

He slowed to a stop, still inside you, and rested on his knuckles, wheezing.

“Are you hurt?” He asked, struggling to get his breath back.

“No, I’m alright,” You replied, just as breathless.

After some time, he uncuffed you and helped you down off of the desk, and the two of you cleaned yourselves up and dressed without speaking. Sitting back down at the table, you reached out for his hand.

“I know your worried about people finding out about… us… what we are…” You said. “But… I like you, John. I don’t want to stop this.”

“I don’t either,” he said with a worried frown, gripping your fingers tightly.

“I…” You gulped. “I could… I could talk to my uncle.”

“What?” Johnny said. “No, don’t! No one can know about this.”

“I won’t tell him about you,” You assured him. “I’ll tell him about me. Uncle George has been more of a father to me than my own father. If anyone would understand, he would. And even if he doesn’t, he wouldn’t tell anyone.”

“You’re absolutely sure of that?”

“Yes,” You said, squeezing his hand. “Trust me.”

Johnny regarded you with a grim expression, but nodded.

That night, you stopped at your uncle’s house unannounced, which you had never done before, though the invitation had always been there.

“My boy!” Your uncle said, hugging you when he opened the door. “Good to see you up and about. What brings you by?”

“Actually, Uncle George, there’s somethin’ I need to talk to you about.”

“Well, this sounds serious,” He said, stepping back so that you could come in. “Maybe we could talk about it over a brandy?”

“That’d be nice, Uncle, thank you.”

He took you to his lounge and pulled a decanter from a shelf. “So what has you looking so dour, son?”

You took a glass and sucked in a deep breath. “Did you and my pa ever have a talk about me bein’… different?”

“Not as such,” George said, sitting in a chair opposite you. “Though my brother and I don’t see eye to eye on many things, so his definition of ‘different’ may not be the same as mine.”

You sighed. “Honestly, Uncle… I’ve always wanted to be open about this, especially with my family, but Ma and Pa beat into me that I… wasn’t right.”

“Not right how?”

Moment of truth. “I… You… You must be wonderin’ why I never had a sweetheart or been interested in marryin’. Truth is… I actually would like to be married… just… not to a woman.”

“...I see,” You uncle said slowly. You winced at his distant tone.

“I’m sorry to disappoint you, Uncle,” you said sadly.

“Young man,” He said. “You haven’t disappointed me.”

You looked up. “I haven’t?”

He shook his head firmly. “No, my boy.” He took a swig from his own glass. “You know, Herbert and I went to college together. We’ve been very close friends ever since. He lived in New York, but he came out here with me to be the judge. Did you know that?”

“No, sir?” You asked, confused by the question.

“Jones and I never married or had sweethearts, either, but our positions put us beyond reproach. People gossiped, of course, but we were members of high society. We had enough power to quash most of it.”

Your jaw dropped. “You… is that why Pa never invited you to the farm? I thought it was because he resented you for being rich.”

George laughed sharply. “That was certainly part of it.” He clapped you on your good shoulder. “Look, son, don’t worry. We still have to be careful, but Herb and I started this town to be a safe place for good people. You’re a good man.” He took another sip. “And so is Johnny.”

Your heartbeat hitched up. “Yes, he is.”

“More to the point, he’s safe. You make sure he knows that.”

You smiled and relaxed, sitting back in the armchair. “I will, Uncle.”

After talking with George, you went back to the jailhouse. Johnny was sleeping when you came in, and you slithered into bed with him. The beds were a little narrow, but you made it work. He snorted awake.

“Did you talk to your uncle?” He asked, cuddling you into his side.

“I did,” You said with a smile, kissing him softly. “It’s alright, Johnny. Everything’s alright.”

He sighed and threw the blanket over you. At ease, the two of you slept.

Since my work is no longer searchable, please do me a favor and reblog this story if you enjoyed it. Help me reach a wider audience! To help me continue creating, please consider buying me a Kofi or donating directly to my PayPal!

Thanks for reading!

My Masterlist

The Exophilia Creator’s Masterlist

[brinytrolls]

Hey! I was wondering if maybe you could throw me a post of all your trolls and a lil blurb abt them? I'm a wee bit new to your blog and friggin love your trolls already but I don't know they're names v well or too much abt them.

OOOO ok sure anon!! im trying to work on a new select page with lots of new info on each troll…but due to university its taking me. a long ass time bc i got No Free Tiiiime 

anyway! ill go hemospectrum order, starting with lowest….and hopefully help u learn a little bit about em! ;v; [u can click their names to go to their character pages ;0 tags also included in case u wannna look em up on my blog!! i also have 2 dancestors so throw an ask if u wanna see them too] 

veleno caudae [#vcaudae]

🐍 severely underloved and underrapreciated-she’s a tough vintage city lesbian with a penchant for illegal things and pushing her luck. she works part time as a lounge singer and cabaret dancer, but thats not where her money comes from.

🎲 she likes to gamble against highbloods in risky games of chance, and often cheats or rigs the game. she doesn’t care, she needs the money more than they do. she’s probably one of the city’s richest lowbloods-but no one knows that.

🐍 she’s pretty coldhearted and untrusting of people-being by herself has gotten her this far, and she’s not about to change her system now. 

rest under the cut or this is gonna get LONG

florem viridi [#fviridi]

🐝 sweet lil jade gal just trying to breeze through life. [or..afterlife? it’s difficult to quantify when you’re a rainbow drinker.] life has kicked her down hard in the past, and she’s trying her best not to let it rule her in the present day, despite her anxieties about it.

🌱 she loves nature and all things that come with it-both the beautiful and the morbid. gardening is her main hobby, but it sits alongside hiking, outdoorsy sports, camping and tea making. not to mention a little dissection, taxidermy and carnivorous plant care to shake up her quads more than a little!

🐝 she’s the ultimate grandma friend–trying to feed up all of her friends and quads and help their lifestyle, but she’s not afraid to stand up for herself or tell you if you’re being ridiculous. she’s no pushover, and has a stubborn temper. she’s three ounces of whoop ass

sarkan sarky nerdal [#snerdal]

🐉 my blogs resident dumbass meme man & grubtuber. despite knowing how to build robots and being a pro at maths and science, he prefers to use his tech knowledge to run a pretty well known grubtube channel. he spends way too much time on the internet as a result. 

🎮 has no sense of self preservation whatsoever, doing dumb stunts he passes off as “parkour”, never sleeping [being a shifter doesn’t help], and generally leading a stupidly unhealthy lifestyle. he consumes enough caffeine in one day to fuel a small family, which doesn’t help with his paranoia and jitters about the empire. 

🐉 generally, he’s a pretty sweet dude, although he never knows when to stop joking or tone down the sarcasm. he’s trying his best.

harrel hierax [#harrel]

📰 stuck up birdboy. he works for the mafia, but not out of his own will, forced into it during his studies as a forensics student. he cleans up crime scenes for a price, and is one of the best in the business to cover up your tracks and stop you being chased down by the police. he’s incredibly professional and businesslike to his clients. 

🎷 behind closed doors and away from…illegal business…he’s a total recluse. a huge hypchondriac and germaphobe, he tries to avoid the outside world-and the people in it-in order to try and gain some control of his life. he compulsively and obsessively cleans and reorganises his apartments, hoping it’ll help his anxieties some. it doesn’t.

📰 in the rare alone moments he manages to chill, he really enjoys music, especially jazz. singing, piano and saxophone is a secret passion of his, not that he gets enough calm moments to practise anymore.

faldur gemela [#fgemela]

🐠 a BASTARD MAN. a violet-fuchsia cusp who thinks he’s the hottest shit around, and could not be more wrong if he tried. awful temper, sour disposition, and generally unfriendly attitude make him possibly the worst person to be around this side of the planet. alternia’s portrayal of seadwellers has him believing he’s above the others and deserves everything he wants, and he gets it.

👑 getting everything handed to him on a silver platter has made him jaded and bored-he’s reckless and impulsive with little empathy, turning to other trolls for entertainment ( 😉 ), as well as alcohol, bars, and the occasional murder. spoiled rich kid levels of boredom leads you to extreme things. 

🐠 his quads are trying to make him better, though-trying to make him focus on his less destructive hobbies like reading, writing, book restoration, astronomy and his 15 cats. it’s...a difficult process. 

ans thats everyone!! feel free to ask more stuff abt anyone ur interested in! im aLWAYS open to it!!

[ravenaveira]

Who’s most likely on the chopping block SPOILERS AHEAD

Ok in the latest trailer we see literally everybody's getting bodied and it looks like pretty much everyone's gonna die or at least a majority of them will but realistically speaking I dont think KH3 is gonna be THAT dark

HOWEVER I do believe there will be SOME deaths as KH3 is supposed to be the darkest kh game I dont see Nomura letting this be a and they all lived happily ever after ending, but I believe its going to be a more bittersweet ending where the good side wins but at a great cost

So the next question is, whos actually gonna die? well I have some theories on whos the most likely to die and whos most likely gonna survive

For starters Mickey Donald and Goofy are pretty much set in stone they’ll be fine, its not TOTALLY impossible but I highly doubt Nomura or Disney would kill off those iconic characters so lets just mark them off right now to the SAFE list

Aqua, Terra, Ventus and Lea are more unknown, they could die or they could not but I’ll explain why its so up in the air

Aqua can and will be saved so it doesnt make much sense for her to die after we go through all this to save her, that being said she could die trying to protect everyone just like she did in the past but I still think to bring her back only to kill her off is highly unlikely so IMO Aqua is safe

Terra is a gamble, hes been on thin ice since BBS and I always assumed he would eventually die anyway I just didnt know when but I always figured he would eventually muster up the strength to free himself and die to protect his friends, I felt like Terra would possibly end himself to prevent Xehanort from using him to hurt any more people, in this case, I see Terra possibly doing that in this situation and I feel like Terra’s ‘death’ is long overdue since at least to me its been hinted thats where his arc was heading since the end of BBS, so IMO Terra is marked for death

Ventus is also a high possibility, if it wasnt Xehanort it was Vanitas trying to kill Ven although in Vanitas case his reasoning is alot more complicated but the fact remains they have both tried to ‘kill’ him in some way shape or form and have been searching for him for years and now that they’ve finally FOUND him the chances are pretty high that Ven is gonna die, he is in a VERY vulnerable position and unable to fight or defend himself and thanks to Aqua nobody knows where he is or how to save him so Ven is definitely in the danger zone and thats why IMO Ventus is hanging by a thread

Lea is a gamble too, he’s already ‘died’ once, became Axel, died again and became Lea again, to have him die a 3rd time seems excessive but it would be heart-wrenching if he is killed by one of his former friends Saix, Xion or Roxas which although having Lea die AGAIN as I said would be excessive this would DEFINITELY be a dark and tragic ending for Lea and the impact would be much bigger than it was the previous times and it’ll hold that much more weight to it seeing him suffer from the loss of Isa and then keep remembering Xion and Roxas as well only to have one of them be the one to take him down for good is just beyond sad, so even though it may be excessive the impact would be massive which is why IMO Lea is marked for death 

Now to move on to the main two, Riku and Kairi

For starters even with my personal bias against Kairi Im not stupid enough to think shes gonna die infact I think its the opposite, Kairi is HIGHLY unlikely to die and here’s why

She’s part of the main trio that we’ve followed from the start, she’s Sora’s love interest, she’s technically the main female, she’s a princess of heart, she’s a keyblade wielder, in other words she’s too tightly woven into the story that for Nomura to take her out would not only be bold af but also extremely unexpected, its not often that you see a member of the main cast killed off but if they are its almost never the love interest which is why I believe Kairi is safe

Their also hyping up the romance way too much for them to just kill her off, unless this whole ‘oath’ and ‘dont think twice’ is just one big red herring and they pull a 180 not only would that be risky af but also pretty danm genius cuz nobody would see that coming but I will not be mad at it and infact would appreciate Nomura even more for takin such a huge risk that not many others would take, although I already know majority of the fandom wouldnt agree with me on that and I think Nomura is aware of the shitstorm he would get if he did that aswell so yea Kairi is definitely safe

Riku not so much, unlike Kairi, Riku is not a love interest or atleast not the one Nomura intended, true Riku is also a part of the main trio but the rival/best friend always has the higher chance of dying to protect the MC than the main female/love interest does

You also have to look at Riku’s character arc, his growth from giving into the darkness and doing horrible things to his journey of redemption, I believe his final atonement would be giving his life to protect Sora who in the past he had hurt so much, this and it leaves Sora still alive to save the world and defeat Xehanort since in the scene we see Sora doesnt have his keyblade and hes on his knees about to be attacked by a swarm of heartless and Riku being the last man standing protects him and if not for Riku, Sora would have died there, but Riku despite all odds against him, gives his all in protecting Sora

Someone made an interesting comparison of when Axel was fading away after ‘putting his whole being into an attack’ from the looks of the trailer Riku is DEFINITELY giving his all in this attack, Riku is ready and willing to die for Sora which is why Riku IMO is marked for death

But I also dont think Riku is gone for good, I think he might become a nobody and he IS the only one in the main trio who hasnt had a nobody, granted because he’s never been in a situation TO have one but now is the perfect time with the perfect setup for this to happen and come into play

How exactly this will play out in the future? I have no idea and until we play the game I cant think of any theories BUT I dont think Riku’s gonna be gone for good, I think he’ll have a Lea situation where he becomes a nobody, ‘dies’ then returns to being his somebody again, or in other words is revived/reborn

Anyway thats all for my theories on who’s most likely to die on the heroes side but what about the villains?

Saix is definitely marked for death, same for most of the seekers of darkness, Vanitas and Ventus MIGHT actually make peace and accept one another and reunite so in a way you could say Vanitas ‘dies’ or he could go tragically and be killed being separated from Ven forever once again

And of course Xehanort is definitely gonna die, he’s the only one I am atleast 98% sure is going to die because at this point he has to unless they go the Iron Blooded Orphans route where literally almost all of the good guys DIE and the bad guys actually WIN with our heroes just having to live in hiding defeated Xehanort is almost gauranteed to die so IMO Xehanort is dead

Now to explain my ranking before I end this post so some of you who may be confused understand what I mean

Marked for death - means they have a target on their back and are within the enemies crosshairs and are highly likely to die unless they are saved by some deus ex machina and a miracle happens

Hanging by a thread - means that they are close to death but not quite sure if they’ll actually die hence why their hanging by a thread, maybe it’ll snap maybe it wont just gotta wait and see how things play out

Safe is self explanatory and the same applies for Dead

Thats everything, let me know if you agree or disagree or you think someone else will die that I didnt mention and why

[whatdidisay]

Decisions, Decisions. A First World Problem.

I’ve never had too much trouble making decisions. Historically, it’s only ever taken me five minutes to pick my lunch, an outfit, and a movie. But as I get older, its become all too much. 

I scroll through Netflix for hours, trawl the shops for the perfect 20th dress and flat-out refuse on being the one to choose a restaurant on outings. Snap decisions seem to be a thing of the past as I overthink everything. 

Do I pick the same option - the safe option? My usual french toast for brunch dates, the same rom-com that is a safe bet in evoking enjoyment or satisfaction? 

And while you may think that these certainly seem like first-world problems, I feel if I can’t get this right, how will we get the important things right?

Because it seems every time I risk trying simple new things it goes wrong. If I can’t even foresee the unsavory amount of aioli on the new brunch burger at my favourite cafe, how can I not anticipate poor outcomes of the life-altering decisions I will need to make one day. 

If I can’t seem to leave for work on time no matter how much I try, what if I take a gamble on the wrong kind of people/person or career? What if, I choose something that goes horribly wrong, what then?

Something that was so simple like apple or orange as a child now induces a full-blown case of the toxic butterflies in my stomach. For me, I fall into this pit of ‘failure is not an option’ often. 

The apple is new, exciting, unknown and looks fairly promising. But the orange, oh the orange is safe and warm and feels as familiar as a hug from mum and I know there is no hurt or disappointment lying ahead as I cut it into quarters. 

So what if I choose the apple, though it could be risky. Its green shiny exterior is just hiding the worm that has crawled its way in, only found after I take a huge bite?

Normally, I’d say, life is short, you can spit the worm out. But what if I can’t? What if I have bitten into enough apples with worms and I am tired of it? What if, my friends and advisors are split down the middle and say do what makes YOU happy, go with your gut?

But, then I take the safe option, guard my heart and risk of failure and the taste of the orange is more bitter than sweet? 

Or worse, what if I sit in limbo, refusing to choose until the whole fruit bowl rots away. 

Do I stay true to the wants and desires I had a year ago, even though things have changed? Even though safe is scary now and scary is much safer?

This doubt has crept into many aspects of life as of late and I have had to take a deep breath and sit back. How dare 2019 carries over problems from the previous year as if the sun rising on the 1st of Jan simply forget to take the pain and worry with it. 

Sometimes, I forget to accept the things I can't change and hold myself to these impossible standards, forgetting that I also hold other people to them too. I gave my self a time limit to feeling sad or disappointed about something and it was exceeded. I told myself I'd be smarter, better, funnier and have all my decisions made by a certain date. 

I think what I am trying to say here is, I have no friggen idea what can or will happen to me and I CANNOT control it. And we CANNOT control it. And man, when that’s your life it’s pretty darn scary. What decision is the right decision? Well, how long is a piece of string?

Take a deep breath with me. 

And now, I spout out all of this great advice I have a lot of trouble sticking to it. 

So here’s another question I am really endeavouring to answer in these hard decision-making times. What situation do you see yourself being the happiest with?

Try it with me. 

I do have one piece of advice though that I have learnt and will always stick to. Don’t EVER base your decisions on what people might think of you if you do or don’t. 

Try it with me x

[theskyexists]

empress ki

are these koreans gonna go as far as to let this man fall for who he thinks is just some young cool guy?

i mean - they’re not chinese so

this is kinda silly lol. if she really wanted to be let go she could have just punched him. i guess that would have gone too far

this RANDOM assassin almost kills them - he disappears. we good. no worries.

where are her own men????

NOOOOO don’t ruin it

why the fuck would she have developed a feminine slap? i think theyre gonna ruin it. like contact with a male love interest will just forcibly feminise you

ok no she came up with an excuse

god - an openhanded slap from another man lol i can see how that might be quite offensive

she just chills in the crown prince’s bath no prob lol. ok so she locked the door

she just let herself get fuckin shot for this lol

this episode moves super fast but thats fun but i still don’t know how the king and the crown prince are related. the whole hostage thing really messed things up

i just realised that i love the bro/bro mlm stuff if its actually m/f. LOL.and I KNOW it’s going to only last one fuckin episode bc we’re gonna go right back to misgyny and chattel slavery especially for women but yknow

does she remember him?? did she send the bandana? i dont know on which side she really is.

yeah ofc shes the bandana guy. i mean - DUH.

WHY RISK YOUR OWN MEN - WHAT WAS THE PLAN

is this spy gonna get her bandana now???

or are these not her own guys?? THEY ARE

is she playing the king?? like - im still trustworthy though!!!! (or at least my men are) but how could she think to rely on the crown prince???

oh no the cool big sword moustache guy!!! why would he be the spy for the king????????????? what is there to gain??????? HE’S NOT THANK GOD

YES!!!! I LOVE THEM. ‘hit me’ BAM *violently and romantically perches over him to almost stab him*

aww haha the king is attached to seung nyang. too bad you’re an evil bastard she wants to destroy

i can’t quite tell why revealing the salt location drop off point is important or not. i guess it was just and only a test.

was that the guy in blue who volunteered to be shot at? : ‘( ah it’s not.its just some nobody. I guess she couldn’t have known who knew of her blue bandana so she had to hide it. But couldn’t she have told this guy from the very beginning when they were alone?

did the official guard not get told that more people were coming???? LOL. that’s one fuckin mess

HEROIC HORSERIDING YEAAAAAAAA did she not think of a reason for being alive? ‘kill me’ OH MY GOD hahahahaa. smart but so risky (it turns out that the crown prince is the crown prince but the king is the brother of his dad’s)

is there something you want? I THOUGHT YOU WANTED MONEY oh my god this guy is gambling it all lol. oh no, he’s gonna make it too.

it’s always the ‘unrightful’ people that get villainised for wanting power

what the fuck her dad’s gonna kill all her friends and make her into a sex slave? jezus christ how dark (i read a synopsis that she gets sent to yuan after all somehow). on who’s fucking authority? couldn’t they have gotten at the very least a letter from the goddamn ‘auditor’ to protect them

oh my god. just wear your fucking ring on the outside of your goddamn clothes. that was so FUCKING close

wow that was a pretty realistic breakdown

GO SEE HIM HELLO!!!!

she became a fucking COP TO SEE HIM HOLY SHIT LOL

JUST SHOW HIM THE FUCKING RING

did she just leave her band of boys behind???

dude why is this series romance blocking me what the fuck

gotta show that Yuan is backward through furs and beads!!

i do love that this series had the guts to start off with heartbreak. but also to let the female protagonist be a big bi....amorous...?

this show somehow made me feel sympathetic towards a stinkin imperial rich kid. he didn’t ask to be born into a family that would become his death

‘young boy’ *is literally at least 40*

the KING has only 10 men to spare? really?

he’s gonna let his servant get fucking murdered in his stead? yikes. ok so that wasn’t his PLAN no. poor servant guy

so they got her a MATCH - a dirven and smart and powerful king. and a soft and unexperienced and endangered future emperor.

this is so much my fucking THING it’s insane. i don’t even mind that the king is kinda ...average looking.

and she kicks his ASS LOL. and he falls ultimately deeply in love with her. this is incredible.

i wonder if she’s going to hold the death of his servant against him

they didn’t even take his head? stupid. oh i guess that’s for the traitors.

SHE STILL DOESN’T GET ITS REALLY HIM. I THOUGHT SHE WAS SMART

really - she lets the fucking chief get the credit. are you fucking kidding me? fuck this. be smarter! hate having to say that to a character. Be! smarter!

now he gets to be WHY HIDE FROM YOUR BOYFRIEND WHAT THE FUCK. if this is gonna be the whole fuckign show i can’t take it.

im gonna need to know if she keeps fucking hiding. stop hiding! STOP. stop hiding from the important men in your life! what the FUCK. stop hiding from your dad. Stop HIDING FROM YOUR FUCKING BESTO BOYFRIEND

the prince isn’t even upset about his servant’s demise

fucking finally somebody found out seung nyang was the ONE

I love Strong King - I love vulnerable future Emperor

he’s just a stupid indoctrinated kid! somebody should explain to him all the horrors that have been done to people in his name!

we have a sequence in which she’s done great deeds, gets called in, is concerned about how she slapped the important person around lol

we’re gonna get teh exact same for Togon one day

jezus christ that’s a very romantic thing to say to a cool and heroic young guy who saved your skin twice, king. are you - i n l o v e? a lil bromance perhaps?

awww he’s so damn happyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.

she’s like - fuck. wish she stayed a little more ruffian though. wheres the fucking swagger!

how am i so into this m/m ship. LOL. im really into this stronk man and rogueish ‘boy’ bonding through hardship crisis crossing all rank

im up for her teaching the prince compassion and horror and the way of the world though

I KNOW this is soon going to devolve into a palace drama though so that fucking sucks

why is the emperor a young guy and the brother an old guy. was the emperor the preferred son? from the preferred wife?

has she never heard a guy pee??? i thought she lived with soldiers and shit

why the fuck is she carrying his excrement to the sea when she’s his BODYGUARD. this went differently than i thought

he literally is alone. there is no shift of the guard with him. hello?

what the fuck is this lax bodyguard shit. you need at LEAST two so one can sleep while the other guards.

everytime she bathes im like - ALARM ALARM

this jimbo traitor is so stupid lol

commander - just approach this stupid idiot. be the dad you want to be.

you could just become his son!!! hello????

so you really care about the peoplle huhg? thats why you keep selling off women?

oh my god. is the prince also falling in love with this ‘boy’? who embodies the masculine ideal? GOD I LOVE THIS SO MUCH im gonna cry when this is over and she ends up a fucking maid

this romantic fucking epic music as they struggle in a petty fucking competition in teh surf jlsjLKFJSDLJ:FLDSF I LOVE THIS

SHE VIOLENTLY PERCHES ABOVE THIS GUY TOO. ROMANTIC MUSIC

the koreans KNOW what is good. THEY KNOW.

oh this poor guy. please let this guy meet poor people. like. idk. the stolen women made into slaves and shit

yeah yeah they bond without him knowing about losing a parent and wanting revenge

the king is like, MY BOY!! that’s MY boy!! hands off!!!! that’s my dearest bromance boy friend!!!!

oh no - shes going to have to choose who to ride with lol

oh nooooooooo Seung Nyang don’t hurt King boyfriend !

‘he will not take Seung Nyang, will he?’  i had to double take there

I FINALLY understand the appeal of all unassailable men in romance. god, my brain is weird.

give seung nyang to me. dsjfpawejfeawjfljsdkljldsjflkdfsa dude. no. i know this is a love triangle but it is just within good if they do THIS moment right

the prince is a horrible shit

nooooo seung nyang please don’t hurt the king!!! he loves you!!!!

‘why am i burning up inside?’ YOU LOVE HIM!! YOU LOVE SEUNG NYANG!!! you love this guy!!! the koreans are daring lil mfs

where is the ruffian guy with the moustache and big sword?? he was the king’s left hand man when he wasn’t king yet.

the actress has really feminised Seung Nyangs mannerisms and way of movement past few eps (oh it’s a dream)

oh my god they’re no-homo-ing this through a dream. he just FEELS like Seung Nyang is a woman!!! that’s why he’s attracted!!! lol

seung nyang loses her dad. prince doesn’t notice. jezus

he impressed some dudewith his self-righteous dragon heaven propaganda. goddddd. the prince truly does not care how many people have already died for him. WHEN will he become likeable instead of hilariously piteous

just absolutely devastating end scene. shitty k-pop outtro.o hgod

will the prince finally - through seung nyang realise that actaully it fucking sucks that people keep being horribly harmed and killed for his sake?

JEZUS CHRIST I AM ON EPISODE 5 wHAT THE FUCK THIS IS LIKE 60 episodes long. oh my god no.

the thing i like about this show is that she looks believably like a very feminine boy for korean standards.

they keep playing him as childish, selfish and incompetent. but like, soooo many people DIED FOR HIM

hwo didn’t they kill bayan for obviously killing their own guard lol

finally she confronts him with the regular people!!!

what is lord jang doing with them

wow the commander’s beard is long. they been going for a while

well he is suffering - but can’t she get to him through words. make him a better person?

he is asking an important question. ANSWER IT GODDAMNIT

thsi ‘warming’ is so ridiculous haahahaha

*has full view of covered breasts* ‘he is definitely a boy!!!!’

i don’t know what sexuality politics this is - probably very bad ones - if you’re a straight man then you’re attracted to some fundamental femaleness in women!! or something

why is a bite mark evidence

god - these powerful people have enormous egos. they must, it is bred in them.i deserve power and when it is taken from me it sucks so much i can’t breathe!!! well uh yeah - everybody feels that way you ain’t special

she looks so sick

feels empathy for the first time ever. what a wonderful fantasy. that somebody could teach a prince empathy

*goes into town completely uncovered in royal robes which haven’t been weathered at all* ok

‘why did you hide you are a woman?’ what COMPLETE AND UTTER MALE NONSENSE

WOMEN ARE GETTING DRAGGED OFF TO BE SEX SLAVES AND YOU ASK THAT??? ‘sure, im sure you had your reasons’

WHAT FUCKING IDIOT

53:50

so she gets him in and then he betrays her? lol. but does it really matter? the king won’t be tried, there’s no reason for goryeo to be annexed. seung nyang won’t die. etc. he might as well go back to his deadly golden cage without endangering himself.

is it for her dad that she asks this of him? he faints, eh that’s a fine way out.

cant she hug a king back when he hugs her????? come ON

he almost killed his fucking son. these people are so CRAAAYYYZY

*leaves the people most likely to turn on him behind with the prince*

why does he have to reveal this?? what are the stakes here??”

goryeo’s soldiers???????????? what the fuck. i thought he was gonna come up with something clever like - pirates or something. not just ‘oh it was a random weirdo band of soldiers’ no -  ‘under the orders of the king’

WHAT. hes throwing teh whole country to the wolves. if seung nyang doesn’t kill him ill be surprised. seung nyang better get him for this for a thousand fucking years.

so he’s even personally betraying seung nyang. for a tiny chance at power. damn. wow. damn wow.

jezus what a fucking way to leave your daughter! making your last exchange putting yourself down as a father. DUDE. could have ended shit in a better way!

anyway literally cried twice about her losing her dad already

anyway so they both die in her arms. great.

yeaaaaaaah swearing to kill him. good. too bad it’s gonna be like 50 eps of palace maid shit and the prince barely got a taste of poverty

really wonder how traumatising this whole - is revealed as a woman and transferred to the empire as a sex slave thing is going to be - for me i mean

‘he’s probably living well in his homeland’  - how could you trust that your orders will be followed???

this is completely unrealistic wow

doesnt she get a fucking horse

who the fuck was park bhu - the undercop?

oh apparently laughing ugly is an indication of evil for a woman. laughing maniacally is an indication of evil for a man

her archnemesis is gonna unmask her as a woman in public? i think i might have to quit this show at this exact moment.

aaand.....guess ill have to quit.

ok that wasn’t so bad

how did they have women’s silks and makeup with them

she’s literally a martial artist warrior and she can’t fight a rapist attacker with her hands free?

oh god. she’s gonna be all feminine now bc she looks like a girl. oh god. i feel kinda sick.

SHE SUDDENLY DOESN’T HAVE ANY BANGS ANYMORE BUT LONG HAIR

THAT COMB WAS MAGICAL

some classic ‘female body weak’ sexism. love getting that from the beau

i know they’re trying to make danashiri seem unsympathetic but she’s saying fuck you to sexism here. then again it’s because she’s a spoiled elite brat

they really are made for each other

holy shit. this series just goes on and on and on and on and on. i can’t do this.

[vitalmindandbody]

Blockbusters assemble: can the mega movie endure the digital age?

From Star Wars sequels to superhero dealerships, blockbusters still govern the film industry. But with Amazon and Netflix tearing up the liberate planneds, are they on iffy floor?

Is the blockbuster in hardship? On the surface, to propose such a thing might seem as foolish as siding out the incorrect envelope at the biggest happen of the film docket because you were busy tweeting pictures of Emma Stone. This is the blockbuster were talking about. Its Luke Skywalker, Jurassic World, Disney, The Avengers, Batman, Superman, Spider-Man, Pixar. Its the Rock perforating his fist through a build. Its the effects-driven culture juggernaut that powers the entire film industry. Does it look as if its in tribulation?

A glance at the balance sheet for the year to appointment would cement the view that the blockbuster is in insulting health. Total grosses are higher at this stage than any of the past five years. Logan, the Lego Batman Movie and Kong: Skull Island have already been gathered in big audiences globally. And then theres Beauty and the Beast, a true-life cultural phenomenon, currently hastening its course up the all-time rankings. All this and theres still a brand-new Star Wars instalment, another Spider-Man reboot, Wonder Woman, Justice League, Alien: Agreement, Blade Runner 2049, plus sequels of (* deep breather *) Guardians of the Galaxy, Cars, World War Z, Kingsman, Transformers, Fast and the Furious, Planet of the Apes, Despicable Me, Thor and Pirates of the Caribbean still to come. Hardly the signs of a crisis, it would be fair to say.

Dig a little deeper though and the foundations that blockbusters are built on start to look shaky. Last-place month, Variety wrote a legend that covered a picture of an manufacture scared to death by its own future, as buyer preferences adapt with changes in engineering. Increased pressure from Netflix and Amazon, those digital-disruption barbarians, has caused the large-scale studios to consider changing the road they liberate movies. The theatrical opening, the 90 -day cushion between a films debut in cinema and its liberate on DVD or streaming, is set to be reduced to as little as 3 weeks in an attempt to bolster diminishing dwelling entertainment auctions. Its a move that the industry sees as necessary, as younger witness develop more adaptable, portable deeming techniques, and surely many smaller yields have begun to liberate their movies on-demand on the same day as in cinemas it was one of the reasons that Shia LaBeoufs Man Down grossed a much-mocked 7 in cinema.

Ana De Armas and Ryan Gosling in Blade Runner 2049. Photograph: Allstar/ WARNER BROS.

At the same time, investors from China long thought to be Hollywoods saviour have suddenly chilled their interest, cancelling major studio treats as the Chinese box office sustains growing tenderness( with domestic ticket sales exclusively increasing 2.4% in 2016 against a 49% rise its first year before)and the governments crackdown on overseas investment starts to bite. Add to that a couple of high-profile recent duds Scarlett Johanssons Ghost in the Shell, Matt Damons The Great Wall, the unintentionally creepy Chris Pratt/ Jennifer Lawerence sci-fi Passengers, Jake Gyllenhaals Alien knock-off Life and you have an manufacture thats not as expanding as the blockbuster bluster might suggest.

Hollywoods response to this instability has been to double down, places great importance on blockbusters to the exclusion of just about everything else. In the past few decades the summer blockbuster season has mission-crept its way well into spring, a phenomenon that has been worded cultural global warming; this year, Logan was released a merely three days after the Oscars objective. The developing impression is of a full calendar year of blockbusters, with a small drop-off for Oscars season in January and February and even in that period this year we are continuing envisioned the liberates of The Lego Batman Movie, The Great Wall, John Wick 2 and the regrettable Monster Trucks.

Meanwhile, the mid-budget cinema that hardy perennial that used to help prop up the industry by expensing relatively little and often deserving mass( recollect Sophies Choice or LA Confidential) has significantly been abandoned by the major studios, its full potential profit margins seen as insufficiently high when the cost of things such as commerce is factored in. Which isnt to say that mid-budget movies dont subsist, its merely that theyre being made by smaller, independent studios understand Arrival and Get Out for recent successful precedents or most commonly as TV sequence.( Theres that Netflix, interrupting situations again .)

In essence, what this all means for the industry is the fact that it blockbuster or bust. Studios have looked at the altering scenery and decided to react by replenishing it with superheroes, act stellars and CGI beasts, realise more blockbusters than they used to, but fewer films in total. The old-time tentpole formula, where a few large-scale movies would shelter the mid-range and low-budget material, has largely been abandoned. The blockbusters are about reducing the cinemas these studios grow down to a minimum, read Steven Gaydos, vice-president and executive editor at Variety. They represent nothing but large-hearted gambles. You have to keep building a bigger and more efficient spaceship.

Its a high-risk strategy and one that, in accordance with the arrangements of Disney and their Marvel, Star Wars and Pixar dealerships, has brought big-hearted wages. But this sudden ratcheting up of the stakes means that the cost of outage has become far more pronounced. Last-place time Viacom was forced to take a $ 115 m( 92 m) writedown on Monster Trucks, while Sony took a writedown of practically$ 1bn on their entire film division after a faltering couple of years.

Hugh Jackman in Logan. Photo: Allstar/ 20 TH CENTURY FOX

While those losses might be explained away as research results of bad bets on bad cinemas Monster Trucks was infamously based on an idea by an managers five-year-old son they hint at the apocalypse that could ensue if a broader, industry-wide trouble were to present itself. Namely, what if the public loses its appetite for the blockbuster?

Its not entirely without precedent: in the late 1950 s, as television threatened to plagiarized a march on cinema, studios responded by starting large-hearted. Spectacle was seen as the key: westerns, musicals and sword-and-sandal epics predominated. But audiences soon ripened tired of these hackneyed genres and ticket marketings continued to diminish. That occasion the industry existed, thanks first to the insertion of vitality provided for under the jumpy, arty New Hollywood films, then later with the early blockbusters such as Jaws and Star Wars.

Could such a mass tuning-out happen again? Certainly, theres an creepy echo in accordance with the rules that Hollywood has reacted to changing experiences with length and spectacle, but also in their narrow focus. Once an sexual thriller such as Fatal Attraction or a musical drama such as Footloose might have reasonably been considered a blockbuster. Nowadays the blockbuster almost exclusively resides in the action, fantasy, minors film or superhero genres.

The superhero film including with regard to looms big over the industry, as every studio tries to repeat the formula to be prepared by Marvel. Ever-more niche caped campaigners are being given their own cinemas Batgirl, Aquaman, the Gotham City Sirens in an attempt to exhume a new Deadpool. Spider-Man and Batman have once again been rebooted by seeking to freshen up the respective dealerships. And, of course, everyone wants their own cinematic cosmo a vast galaxy of characters that together can generate a seemingly infinite number of spin-offs, sequels and prequels. At this very time, the creators of Call of Duty are actively seeking to turn their terrifying shoot-em-ups into a series of interlocking cinemas, while James Cameron a director whose preferred method of cracking a nut is with a sledgehammer, you suppose is creating a cosmo around his smash-hit Avatar, rife with five sequels, graphic novels, actual romances and, most bewilderingly, a Cirque du Soleil show.

These shared universes actively court the sort of audiences who will turn up to every movie, buy the action anatomies, don the cosplay outfits and gobble the branded breakfast cereal in other words, teenage boys. The dominant ideology is fanboy culture, suggests Gaydos. It is adolescent. It is conflict resolution by violence. It is wish-fulfillment, spectacle and recreation tone and feeling, if we are seeking to get Shakespearean.

Truly, the geeks have inherited the earth. But what about the rest of us? How many have the time, intensity or inclination to sit through, enunciate, all the cinemas in the forthcoming Universal Monsters shared universe, which begins this year with a reboot of The Mummy and has resurgences of Wolf Man, Van Helsing and the Invisible Guy in pre-production? Greenlighting this line of cinemas without be seen whether anyone is going to bother to watch even the first of them looks like a risky struggle, and the recent situation of the Divergent YA cinema dealership, whose latest cinema is being exhausted as a TV movie due to lack of interest, offers up a cautionary narration that studios should perhaps be paying attention to.

Cars 3. Photo: Allstar/ WALT DISNEY PICTURES

But whats striking about all these blockbusters is how youth-skewed they are, at a time when a one-third of cinemagoers in the US are over the age of 50. Older audiences can enjoy The Avengers as much as everybody else, of course, but sloping your sell primarily towards young people is a risky programme. Young beings tend to be the most fickle audience, one whose attention is split in thousands and thousands of plazas, pronounces Gaydos. Theyre too the gathering least able to splash out on cinema tickets. And of course theyre an audience who are becoming increasingly accustomed to watching material on their telephones, laptops and smart TVs.

In other words, theyre the ones likely to force through the seismic change the industry is currently fretting over. If they lose interest in the modern blockbuster in accordance with the rules that younger audiences turned away from the westerns, musicals and historic epics in the 1960 s, the studios will have to find something lustrou and brand-new to brandish in their faces and this time they wont have something akin to the New Hollywood to courtroom them with, as that sort of transgressive, jumpy, groundbreaking price is increasingly growing up on the small screen.

Perhaps the best event the studios can do in the face of this new world is to demonstrate some imagery in how they develop and present their blockbusters and there are signs that this is already happening. Producer Stephen Woolley, who has worked on movies such as The Crying Game and the forthcoming adaptation of On Chesil Beach, quotes Deadpool as a cinema that has subtly managed to change the perception of the superhero movie. Its taking a much more sophisticated consider of that world-wide and humiliating it, while at the same strengthening it. It was a ingenious have-your-cake-and-eat-it from the ones who caused it.

Meanwhile, Disneys successful live-action reimaginings of their inspired undertakings most notably Beauty and the Beast and The Jungle Book suggests that its possible to play the sequels and remakes recreation without it detecting like a retread over old-time dirt. Most remarkably of all, the musical think this is making a comeback with the success of La La Land, that rare mid-budget movie to have crossed over into blockbuster status, grossing more than $400 m at a fund of $37 m.

Woolley is aware of the risks twirling around the blockbuster, but feels that mass extinguishing is still some method away, if it ever arises. The peril you have is that gatherings are fickle, and we are able to abruptly turn off, he alleges. Something happens for them to say: Actually, we dont like those movies any more. And theres always this inkling that is likely to happen. But every time it seems to happen on the blockbuster figurehead, another movie comes out to prove you wrong.

Ultimately, though, what might keep the blockbuster safe for the time being is not the films themselves but all the stuff around them. The thought that the studios are seeing is something akin to a hypermovie or a supermovie, alleges Gaydos. Its a whole other thing. Its a toy-delivery arrangement. A Cars movie will gross $500 m or $600 m but the Cars products will sell$ 4bn. Ultimately the movie is designed to be a giant sell implement for merchandise and theme park that generate billions and billions.

As Hollywood agonises over its own future, it might be that the best lane for the blockbuster to survive is to subsume itself into big, more secure revenue streams: dolls, competitions, merchandise, live attractions. So if you want to keep the blockbuster around for a little while longer, you should get your Superman costume on and spout yourself a container of that branded cereal.

Read more: www.theguardian.com

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