#the discourse however somehow never reached me

[hydrachea]

Give me the ship opinions on kaeluc ☆

ship ask game

Kaeluc: Ship It

What made you ship it? Kaeluc is actually one of the two Genshin ships that broke containment and reached me before I even started playing, so I already had a bias (that you, my dear friend, absolutely did not help). Then I started playing and the deal was easy to seal, wow, red/blue duo that had an intense falling out and have a tense relationship to this day, plenty of in-game pandering, and they're brothers? It was a losing battle from the start.

What are your favorite things about the ship? The angst they have is delicious, especially from Kaeya's side. Everything that went down the night Crepus died, the way he knew how Diluc would react but still went through with coming clean... And how he never blamed Diluc for it and cared for his Vision after he left Mondstadt, returning it safe to him when he came back... He cares! He cares!! I also love how well they know each other despite everything, and I love the thought of them possibly eventually making up. They have a whole arc and we're only in the middle of it, Hoyo keeps us so well-fed.

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship? The whole "brothers vs sworn brothers" debate is pointless, both are true in the first place considering they are sworn brothers but were also raised together with Kaeya being adopted by Crepus, so pick whichever you like best and leave it at that. It really doesn't matter, just enjoy yourselves.

[notwithaste]

as i still process unnatural habits and annoy my nearest and dearest fandom friends with my endless discourse on phryne-jack-rosie dynamic absolutely nobody asked for as well as dissecting that last scene - you know the one where she said it’s never too late for him (ha!) and he wanted her to know he wasn’t with rosie and she was very relieved to know he wasn’t with rosie and he was fully going to kiss her and they smiled dumbly at each other and he went out presumably to commit murder so they could work together again soon and she ended her night leaning back against the door smiling dreamily (i know what you are phryne fisher!)

yes AS i still process ~that episode, i have somehow in a feverish daze reached season 3 and let me tell ya, the opening credits are nowhere ~near long enough for me to process that cold open because they’re ~dating? 🧎🏼‍♀️

it’s that breath she takes before she opens the door to what she thinks is jack that will haunt me, because this is jack and this matters. help.

‘is that an invitation.’

‘well i could wait a whole day for yours.’

and that exchange is snappy and quick and witty as they always are, but boy if there isn’t an undercurrent of something more there from phryne and as much as she’s been the flirty airy force in this dance they’ve been doing, i think it’s wearing on phryne a little, his reluctance and his guard. and i am really curious about their date and how it was arranged and who made it happen and what were the implications because that was NOT a friendly meal and they were both giving it such regard and relevance and care, and then the disappointment and frustration in the aftermath, and the trying again and god. that was a date date.

and then of course the main event with THE OTHER MEN. THE CONSTANT PARADE. lord i have asked and i have received 😭

and i don’t mean that in the sense that phryne should be called out on her men or her past (never!) but that it would bother jack? yes, of course it would bother jack, of course it does; and it may have taken enough whiskey to kill a horse (dear repressed jack, never change) but i’m so glad it came out. jealous trope can be so SO good when done right and so often on shows we get the tired generic shtick that comes out possessive and controlling and over the top, but here jack is in fact actively trying to be okay with it. he’s trying to be the man she needs him to be (or rather the man he thinks she needs him to be!) and it’s so endearing and so jack and i love that. but the thing is, jealousy is an emotion like any other and it’s human and when someone you love is with someone else, that’s gonna bother a person and i just love how honest and raw that scene is. especially considering how long it must have been brewing and how much it must have been bothering him to say something at all, let alone be so candid about it (i love you, alcohol).

(also phryne’s delivery of ‘what other men’ had me YODELLING 😭😭 i love her more than words can say.)

(oh but yes; he’s trying so hard to be what he thinks she wants him to be and all she wants is him.)

and then of course the undressing scene elmo fire gif 😮‍💨 now i don’t know if she was just saying it to throw him off kilter but i find it hard to believe phryne fisher wouldn’t do at least some of the undressing; sneak a peak, call it research, reconnaissance if you will.

i hate they didn’t get their date however i LOVE the layer her father’s presence has added to phryne. that last scene, the raw old hurt there - accentuated by the fact ~she always plays the role of the frivolous one; god that juxtaposition honestly gave me goosebumps! - was so honest and exquisite.

and when baron toast to his daughter, the look jack shoots her is ~knowing. she may be putting up an indifferent casual front but he knows her and he notices and god it’s so good. i really want this explored and addressed, especially but not exclusively with jack and phryne.

(also mac asking phryne what have you done to him 😭 and then when phryne says stood him up for another man she’s like come on cough up like phryne standing up jack is the most ridiculous concept 😭 also, mac and jack as friends in law is my favourite non-phrack headcanon interaction 🫶🏻)

and god i just love this new dynamic we’ve shifted to in s3, the way they are about each other and with each other is just so… inevitable. i mean she’s always been tactile but now she’s ~tactile; she’s not just teasing and edging anymore. and he’s been reserved but now he’s calling her out - and not just in his big speech but throughout the episode. and it feels like there’s a clear purpose to what they’re doing, a clear shift that’s happened where they went from knowing who they are to each other in season 2 to taking that knowledge and giving it direction and trajectory and purpose, and the progression is just wonderful to watch 😭

(that said, i’ve only seen 3.1 so far so if i’m horrendously wrong you’ll give me a break and we’ll just pretend i never said that 😂)

tl;dr they should kiss now and jack’s floppy bed hair is very lovely and should make an appearance alongside phryne’s going to bed face from unnatural habits and essie’s freckles are a source of great distraction to me

[dailybayonetta]

sorry, if im bothering you with this (you don't need to anwer if you don't want to), another one of these discourses about bayonetta i've seen with queerbaiting with bayojeanne and that one spoilers thing. do you agree it's an actual thing that happened?

Okay, so BIG SPOILERS AHEAD (metion of them, but not explicit) and lots of text ________

So let me start by saying, usually, as a gay person myself - I've been in this situation. When you clearly have a dynamic between friends of the same gender but it's written much more deeply and with the care and with the actual tropes that get used for het couples and filled with love (and that word gets thrown around, but like, we talking about any kind of love). That happens. But what also happens - is that writers / devs usually never confirm these. Fans and fandom do more job of putting lgbt rep into something that originally doesn't really have it or hidden in narrative (pushed, that also common with censoring) and then act like devs or writes or show runners own them something they invented. Again, it's a complex issue, because sometimes authors take time or have to push for relation ships (LoK / adventure time) and sometimes authors take credit for the ships fans popularised (that one supergirl show comes to mind???) However, in Bayojeanne cause, I can kind of see where people coming from because: a) Bayo herself is an ambiguous character, people been saying for ages that she's bi coded (i can't speak on that honestly) b) Kamiya called Bayonetta and Jeanne couple - not a pair, not duo, and compared them with other couples (that also semi-canon / canon)

c) a lot of promo material art, just as concept art depicted them in way that would couples would. especially couples that have "different side of the coin" dynamic and that complement each other some examples: 1 // 2 // 3 // 4 // 5

Fanservice? Sure. Still. A thing that did happened. d) the scenes they had were also common for couples, shots on the reaching hands (the recent one i can think about with cloud and tifa in ff7remake), bayonetta holding jeanne "bride" style, bayonetta holding jeanne when saving her soul (do i need to mention how later they did that scene in familliar way with luka and bayo but just without the kiss, riiiight) and like, i could go on, but you get the idea

d) And what I also think Bayojeanne isn't just that kind of ship that was "oh fans hyped it up and they never interacted in canon" or something. It's in the story. Again, maybe it wasn't explicit and writers probably didn't intended to be that way (maybe Kamiya did but looking at bayo3 who knows), because once again it's a common thing when writes do this type of dynamic and "oh, the bond is so strong" and that kind of thing has a right to exists, if it wasn't for the othert stuff i said about. Again, it's a complex idea and situation. And many things matter in the case. And I'm not a professional and not that type of person who cared about it in Bayonetta of all things. Does that falls under "queerbaiting"? Hell, if I know, because I never expected them somehow to get canon or anything (and if you go through my baoyjeanne tag you know I love them dearly), cause not only being a game from japanese devs but also that I know better now because I got baited enough in various media before. Can I blame people for thinking this was queerbaiting? No, I don't think I can. Especially because it's just bad for the script. What this implies of such strong and impowering fantasy character as Bayonetta is even worse. And like, Bay///o/lu//ka doesn't in any way erase Bayonetta's bi-coding or her being into Jeanne (afterall it's not the same Bayo and we got multiverses now🙄) but I think people are upset because it was executed reeeeeally poorly and untasteful for such character. And people saying it's kind of character assasination are right in a lot of ways. Hell idk why anyone skips the part that Luka also didn't got any development and got thrown in this mess as well. And also THAT PART. What happened with it - who knows what was even going on in the writing room of Platinum.

[arielmagicesi]

Briefly back on Tumblr explanation

Hi everyone,

I haven't been on Tumblr since last autumn because I haven't been on any social media. I am not staying back here on Tumblr permanently, but I am logged back in briefly in order to:

a) clean up anything necessary for potential future employers who somehow find my Tumblr

b) go through my likes and tags to find anything I saved, like recipes or lifehacks or book recs (and reblogging all the posts I wanted to reblog)

c) reconnect with my beloved mutuals and friends from here and find ways for us to communicate that are not Tumblr, Twitter, or Instagram

FAQs section:

How long are you staying? As long as it takes me to complete the above tasks. However, I will be avoiding scrolling down my dashboard as much as possible, and trying to stick only to the above tasks, so I may miss out on any posts you make.

Why are you leaving Tumblr? It's complicated, and I don't want to get into why right now (in order to avoid any random user who stumbles across this post deciding to start discourse with me while I'm trying to just sort through recipes and shit). I'll leave a longer explanation here before I log off for good. SHORT ANSWER: Social media is really, really bad for my mental health, and I'm trying to not do things that are bad for my mental health.

Are you OK in real life? Yes, I'm fine. I have a good support network, I finally got a full-time teaching job, and there's no immediate personal crises or whatever.

How do I know whether I count as a beloved mutual or friend or whatever? I'm gonna reach out to some of you, but if you want to stay in touch, please feel free to just message me or reply to this post. If I know you (aka, you're not a random stranger or bot I've never met) (and also, if you changed your URL a bunch, you may need to remind me who you are lol), I'll probably be down to stay in touch. If you feel uncomfortable messaging me but you still want to stay in touch in some way, my AO3 (same user name) still exists and I still check it and if I ever write another fic, I'll post it there.

What's going to happen to your existing posts? The whole blog as it is will stay up. My account will still exist. I just won't be logged in.

Any other questions: Put them in my ask box or messages, I'm happy to answer them.

[foibles-fables]

Hey! I saw your tweet earlier. I’m sorry you (and many others here) seem to keep receiving so much hate. I’m writing this to send you some love because you deserve it! Thank you for always being a beacon of light in the Horizon fandom. The stuff you write and post always bring a smile to my face. Loved all your comments about Call of the Mountain.

I feel bad about the current state of this fandom. I knew we had some bad apples, but I guess I underestimated them. I know we will eventually bounce back, once the homophobes shut up for good and some of the weirdos calm down a bit. We’ll have our peaceful little corner of the internet again.

And that will only happen thanks to people like you, meg-noel-art, and many others who, somehow, always manage to keep things light and fun. As they should be.

PS: This the first ask I send you and I’m sorry for never commenting or saying much. English is not my first (or even second) language, and I am a little shy. I’m more of a lurker, I guess. Also, seeing all the recent attacks might have made me crawl further into my little comfort safety zone lol.

PPS: Full disclosure: my main horizon ship is Ereloy. However, I absolutely love everything you and meg-noel-art post about Talanoy. I try to like and reblog everything I see. Though I always low-key shipped them, since ZD, I guess I’m almost completely converted now because of you. I, too, miss Talanah lol Also, for some reason, the DLC only made me ship them harder. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Sorry for the long message and thank you, again! Cant' wait for the focus network fanzine!

Oh my goodness--thank you SO MUCH for this kind ask. Seriously, this made me smile so much after a ridiculous day, and I appreciate it more than you can even know! Totally flattered you've enjoyed being around and have liked all the silliness I've put out--seriously, my heart is so full <3 <3 <3

The fandom is definitely going through A Moment. And honestly, the gross mainstream homophobia and the shipping gatekeeping/discourse alike are starting to get pretty exhausting. But I'm definitely trying my best to do as you said--to be a beacon for the fandom--until things calm down! Because they absolutely will. We've carved out a nice space, and when everything settles, the peace will return.

Again, I'm so grateful that you decided to reach out! Keep on enjoying your fave ships, and I truly hope you love the zine! Lots of great stuff coming up :) have THE BEST day and please take care!!!

[hyruleanlegends]

Call me Benji!

I am a woman in my 30s. Due to this, I may both be slow to replying. Additionally, I do not write with anyone younger than 18.

This is a multi-muse blog for Groose (Skyward Sword), Sheik (Ocarina of Time), Dark Link (Ocarina of Time), Impa (Hyrule Warriors).

I am completely fine with interacting with duplicates.

My other blog is @fiiirsthero. That blog is paired with @goddessofliiight. This will play some role into how I interact with some characters here.

I am perfectly fine shipping. However, shipping is not the main purpose of this blog.

SPEAKING OF HYLIA - I will not write with anyone who OOCly feels that Hylia is somehow evil, abusive, manipulative, etc. As my partner writes Hylia, this is just simply incompatible. In regards to your character feeling this way, I am perfectly fine and open to plots of discourse over that. If I begin to feel that these types of plots are not in good faith, however, and are just an excuse to degrade Hylia, I will end writing with you.

I am happy to write in fandoms outside of Zelda. Here is a general list of fandoms I am comfortable writing in: General Final Fantasy/Any Final Fantasy game, Tales of Series blogs, Kingdom Hearts, Fire Emblem

If you are an original character or a character from another series not listed and you follow me, I will take a look at your blog and likely follow back. If I am not aware of the fandom, I will do my best to DM you to ask if you had any ideas.

Speaking of - I will only interact with people who follow me. This is just so I know that you are interested. If you unfollow me, that is completely a-okay. If we have been interacting I may reach out once to confirm this was no an accident. This is not in any way an attempt to harass, just a confirmation that tumblr did not Tumblr.

If I follow you first, I am not likely to send in any sort of password or confirmation of rule reading as I admittedly will not fully read your rules to the most minute detail until we are mutuals. I may not do it after you follow me back but I will do my best. I may forget.

I have never heard of Discord before.

[wizardbreen]

Goncharov’s MUSIC

Okay I've been seeing all of this Goncharov discourse around, and it's driving me fucking NUTS how nobody has mentioned what I consider to be one of the most amazing parts of the movie: its jaw-droppingly stunning soundtrack, and the enigmatic composer behind it. From the hauntingly minimalist piano in the long opening shot in the railyard (punctuated by blasts of steam and using the tempo established by the chugging locomotives) to the frantic, crashing wave of strings, cymbals, and church-bells that accompanies the climactic shootout in the third act, there is no moment of this film that does not have remarkably effective scoring and composition. It's a masterpiece. The wavering picollo that we hear time and time again as an omen of imminent death? The elaborate organ during the interlude in the funeral parlor? UNFORGETTABLE. I'm copy-pasting the next bit from an article that I found a few years back--by all accounts it should have blown up like crazy, but somehow it didn't find the traction it deserves. I haven't fact-checked it personally, so take it with a grain of salt or two, but also prepare to have your mind fucking blown:

"The score of Goncharov has attracted much attention for its elaborate composition and the wide-reaching musical influences it seems to pull from. Many reviewers rightfully praised its masterful implementation of the full breadth of the orchestra, as well as its impeccable usage of traditional instrumentation both Russian (the balalaika, the mandolinesque doma, haunting svirel, and jangling buben), and Italian (the castagneta, the zampagna, the organetto, harpsichord, etc.) and the way it borrows effectively from both musical traditions and styles, as well as from the popular genre of the Spaghetti Western.

For many years, the identity of Goncharov's composer has been hotly debated, with no clear correct answer emerging. The composer is credited, of course, as НИкО Мариусович Орлов-Петров, (transliterated: Nico Mariusovich Orlov-Petrov) though this is widely agreed to be a pseudonym, as no other works by this composer have been found to exist. Querying the movie's production team has been met only with stubborn silence and the threat of lawsuits. Many Russian and eastern-european composers and musicians have been put forward as possible composers, but none have come forward to confirm these claims (and many have denied it outright). Imagine my surprise when I took  a closer look at the name, and found what seems to be a ridiculously obvious answer.

The patronymic 'Mariusovich,' 'son of Marius', is something of a peculiar russian name, though not beyond the realm of possibility. 'Orlov-Petrov' is, however, an extremely unusual surname, with an extremely unusual construction. 'Orlov' can mean either Eagle, or sharp-eyed. Petrov can be translated simply as rock 

The given name (НИкО) is peculiar: the first, second, and fourth letters are capitalized. The third is not. Most claim this as a simple typo. I think it means that the к is to be disregarded, and the remaining letters highlighted. НИО. En, I, O. taken all together, we get something like:

En I O , son of Marius, (Eagle/sharp-eyed stone/rock)

Imagine my surprise, when looking up some facts about my favorite film composers, that Ennio Morricone's father was named Mario. And that the surname Morricone derives from the medieval Moricus, meaning…’sharp stone’.  

I make no absolute claims. Morricone certainly never took credit for it, and I respect his decision. I think, though, that anyone who listens to the score with an open mind might be surprised at just how well this theory fits."

[evilwickedme]

This may be WILDLY belated considering when the books were published, but what’s the Raven Cycle about/why is it good in your opinion? Always heard a lot about it in the abstract but nothing actually about the plot.

I mean yeah it's a little belated but better late than never is real and especially applies to one of my fav books of all time

Ok so what is TRC about? In a literal sense it's about a girl named Blue, who isn't psychic but who lives in a house full of women who are including her mom, who's been told her entire life that if she kisses her true love, he will die. She then gets involved with a group of boys from the local prep school, Gansey, Adam, Ronan, and Noah, who - under Gansey's leadership - are looking for a dead (possibly not actually dead) Welsh King right there in West Virginia.

But that's just the story. Listen, this thing's got intrigue and murder and soft magic systems for days, but that's not what makes TRC one of my all time favorite books of all time.

So what is TRC about? As a whole, it's about family - in all its forms. Blood relations, for better and for worse, and friendships that are closer than blood. As a whole, it's about class - the ways class shapes us and the opportunities we do or do not get because of it and what it means about our past, present, and future and how it lets us relate to one another or prevents us from understanding one another.

But on an individual level, each character undergoes such specific arcs that are somehow so universal you can't help but empathize with all of them. It's about learning that you don't hate yourself, or at least learning to stop hating yourself. It's a coming out narrative. It's about getting out of an abusive situation and the many steps it takes to recover from that mindset. It's about chasing love. It's about desire. It's about wanting to plant your feet in the ground and still reach for the stars.

It's also about cars. And trees. There are so many trees.

Like seriously. A fuckload of trees.

Why is it good? It's well written, for one. All my copies, whether digital or physical, are covered in highlights and notes and google translations of latin. I've analyzed and analyzed again and read and reread these books and I always find something new in them.

There's something that's so homey about the minds of these characters. Especially having first read them as a deeply strange teen, they capture something about being a deeply strange teen that I simply haven't seen anywhere else. And this is the example of the found family trope, for me. These deeply strange teens who found other deeply strange teens to understand and love them.

The supporting cast here is also rich and varied. There's something like thirty POVs in the final book but it doesn't feel like it, because you've been existing alongside these characters for so many pages that getting to say goodbye to all of them is all that makes sense.

Beyond that a lot of the reasons I think are good are straight up spoilers or even veer into discourse. But yeah, TRC is worth your time. Several times over.

Also, the audiobooks are like, fine, and available for free on Spotify, which fucked up my stats for 2021 and also forever and ever in general, so there you go.

(I've only read each book in the sequel series, The Dreamer Trilogy, once each, so I'm not nearly as eloquent on it as I am this one, but I will say that it's also worth reading, but it deals with entirely different subjects, is a little darker, and I don't love it as much. I'm not unhappy with the end Maggie Stiefvater gave us for this world, however.)

[fiiirsthero]

Rules

Call me Benji!

I am a woman in my 30s. Due to this, I may both be slow to replying. Additionally, I do not write with anyone younger than 18.

I am completely fine with interacting with duplicates.

While I will interact with other Hylia's, @goddessofliiight is the only Hylia I will ship with. Any other Hylia would be platonic or familial.

I am perfectly fine shipping with other characters. However, shipping is not the main purpose of this blog.

As a subnote to this, I am unsure if he will be interest in shipping with other Zelda's, as he views them as daughters of Hylia and feels that's... a bit strange.

SPEAKING OF HYLIA - I will not write with anyone who OOCly feels that Hylia is somehow evil, abusive, manipulative, etc. As my partner writes Hylia and this Link is in love with her, this is just simply incompatible. In regards to your character feeling this way, I am perfectly fine and open to plots of discourse over that, and can see how this Link could offer advise to others who are struggling with their role placed on their shoulder from the reincarnation cycle started by Demise. If I begin to feel that these types of plots are not in good faith, however, and are just an excuse to degrade Hylia, I will end writing with you.

I am happy to write in fandoms outside of Zelda. Here is a general list of fandoms I am comfortable writing in: General Final Fantasy/Any Final Fantasy game, Tales of Series blogs, Kingdom Hearts, Fire Emblem

If you are an original character or a character from another series not listed and you follow me, I will take a look at your blog and likely follow back. If I am not aware of the fandom, I will do my best to DM you to ask if you had any ideas.

Speaking of - I will only interact with people who follow me. This is just so I know that you are interested. If you unfollow me, that is completely a-okay. If we have been interacting I may reach out once to confirm this was no an accident. This is not in any way an attempt to harass, just a confirmation that tumblr did not Tumblr.

If I follow you first, I am not likely to send in any sort of password or confirmation of rule reading as I admittedly will not fully read your rules to the most minute detail until we are mutuals. I may not do it after you follow me back but I will do my best. I may forget.

I have never heard of Discord before.

[hobie-doh]

I'm very proud of the fact that for the most part I'm pleasant and try to get along with people or not interact with those I know I won't get along with and trying not to engage in online discourse, however, I had one hater for a brief moment in time and I'll never get over it.

They weren't a good person and somehow ended up in a bunch of discord servers with me and my friends (we literally don't know how they got there), they were mean and did things I don't wanna talk about and generally sucked in both casual conversations and our RPs but that's beside the point.

When things reached a boiling point I asked them to stop and they kicked me out of one of servers and went on a long rant about me.

"Hobie is a two faced lying backstabbing bastard" is one of my favorite things ever mostly because they shortly followed it up with, "Wait, what's Hobies gender? Is it lying bitch?"

[theraspberryler]

IRL Benchtrio Tickle Fic (creative, I know)

Welp, here you go! This is my first ever fic, and I’m actually kinda happy with how it turned out. 

Summary: Ranboo’s staying with Tubbo in the UK, and Tommy goes over to visit them. However, Ranboo ends up finding himself in a,, mood, of sorts. He overthinks the situation too much and ends up freaking out, but luckily, he’s got two awesome friends who are there for him! (hurt/comfort)

~This is a tickle fic! If that’s not your thing, then move on please~

TW - Panic attack, self deprecating thoughts, let me know if I need to add anything else

Ranboo had been in the UK with Tubbo for a couple days now, and the two of them have been having a blast, the pure joy and excitement of finally getting to see each other in person had given them the energy to keep going constantly over the past two days, with them doing multiple streams and other activities. They had decided to meet up with Tommy that day, planning to record a vlog for Tommy’s vlog channel, but the past nights of practically no rest had caught up to the two, and when Tommy arrived at Tubbo’s house and saw how exhausted they appeared, he insisted they take the day to rest. They could record the vlog later, it wasn’t a big deal.

Of course, Tubbo and Ranboo immediately protested, but once Tommy made up his mind he was a force to be reckoned with. Eventually they settled to spend the day relaxing at Tubbo’s house, no cameras, and Ranboo had to admit, it was pretty nice. The three of them hadn’t had the chance to just talk without the stress of cameras being in their faces for quite a while, and they all needed the chance to just mess around and act like kids. No need to worry about carefully choosing their words to avoid any discourse. 

Tommy was currently sitting in the chair at Tubbo’s desk, aimlessly spinning in circles as he recalled the events of the previous day, waving his hands around with an animated expression. Tubbo and Ranboo were seated on opposite ends of Tubbo’s bed, Tubbo laughing at Tommy’s over dramatic retelling of,,, something. Despite his best efforts, Ranboo couldn’t seem to pay attention to Tommy’s words. He told himself that he didn’t know what was causing his fidgety mood, but he knew he was lying to himself. 

Earlier that day when Tommy first arrived, he shoved the door open with his usual flair, and loudly announced his arrival. Obviously excited to see him, Tubbo and Ranboo rushed over to greet him. Ranboo had instantly gathered Tommy up into a hug and held him close. And despite the show Tommy put up of not liking Ranboo, he latched onto the other as well, though of course not without poking fun at the other for being so eager to greet him, and a few playfully exchanged insults. That had been great, the thought brought a smile to his face. The part that had Ranboo squirming in his seat right now, was the way Tommy scribbled his nails into his sides after not being able to come up with a witty comeback to one of Ranboo’s playful jabs. It was brief, and after laughing at the squawk Ranboo let out good-naturedly, he dropped it. But, it was more than enough to send Ranboo’s brain spiralling into a lee mood, which only intensified as the playful atmosphere in the room continued.

Ranboo had told Tubbo before about this,,, liking of his before, and he had responded with only positivity, and he knew deep down that Tommy wouldn’t judge him either, but he still tried to forcefully shove the mood down, still telling himself that it was weird, and that Tommy and Tubbo would surely mock him if he admitted to them how he was feeling. 

The only problem was, while Ranboo was lost in thought, the other two had noticed how unusually quiet he had been, and Tommy paused his storytelling, asking if he was alright. At the attention being turned to him, Ranboo froze up, and his nerves kicked in, but he still tried to play it off. 

“I-I uhm, y-yeah, I’m fine.” Ranboo cursed himself for his lousy attempt to reassure them, and the other two clearly didn’t buy it.

“You sure, ‘Boo? If we’re doing something to make you uncomfortable, you can tell us.” Curse Tubbo for being so damn sweet, and those big, worried eyes that were carefully observing him. Ranboo fidgeted in place, refusing to make eye contact with either in the room. He was silent, getting increasingly frustrated with himself. Why couldn’t he come up with a response? Why did he have to be so bad at social interaction? This is so stupid for me to get worked up about, just say something! 

As Ranboo remained silent, Tommy and Tubbo’s concern for him only grew, and Tommy pushed himself up from the chair he was sitting in. making his way over to sit on the bed next to him. Seeing how uncomfortable Ranboo seemed, they didn’t push him to talk anymore, and both shuffled around to sit on either side of him. Ranboo risked a glance to his side, and, catching his gaze, Tommy offered him a kind smile, slowly reaching out to softly grasp his hand. And, oh shit, Ranboo could feel that familiar burning behind his eyes, and he quickly pulled his knees up to his chest, burying his face into them. God, why were they always so sweet to him? He was getting so worked up and upset over a stupid mood, and couldn’t even manage to say anything to them! In his frustration with himself, the tears in his eyes began to overflow, and his breath hitched.

Tubbo pressed up closer to him, bringing his arms up to wrap around Ranboo, before he paused.

“Hey, ‘Boo, it's alright. Can I touch you?” Ranboo managed a nod at that, and Tubbo wrapped his arms around him, pulling him close. It was a little awkward with Ranboo being so much taller than him, but the embrace still served its purpose and Ranboo melted into his touch. Tommy brought his free hand up to Ranboo’s back, rubbing circles into it.

“Hey, Ranboo, it's okay. We’re here. Breathe with me, yeah?” He hadn’t even noticed how his breathing had sped up, but he allowed Tommy to guide him through the panic attack, as he counted their breaths, in and out, moving the hand on his back up and down along with the rhythm. 

After a few minutes of counting and failed attempts, Ranboo had managed to considerably calm down. In that time, the three of them had managed to maneuver into a laying down position, both Ranboo and Tubbo practically laying on top of Tommy, nearly crushing him, but somehow, they were comfortable. After a couple more moments of them all breathing together, Tubbo broke the silence.

“Hey, ‘Boo, you think you could manage to tell us what happened? You don’t have to, but it would help Tommy and I be able to help you.” Ranboo took a deep, stuttering breath, before he opened his mouth to speak. His voice was rough and scratchy, but he pushed on anyway. 

“I-Its stupid, really. I was just in a certain, u-uh,, m-mood, and got frustrated with myself. I-I’m fine, really, I was just upset that I couldn’t say what I was thinking.” Tubbo caught on to what Ranboo meant by “mood” pretty quickly, Ranboo having told him about it before. Tommy still didn’t know what he meant by that, but pushed on anyways, and spoke up. 

“That's not stupid at all, not being able to say what you’re thinking can be really frustrating and scary. You did a great job just now, though, with telling us what happened, I’m proud of you for that.” Ranboo whined at the slight praise, though he couldn’t deny how Tommy’s words and reassurances made him feel better. 

Tubbo forced himself to sit up, stretching his arms and rubbing his eyes. 

“Why don’t we put on a movie? And, uh,, if you wanted to um,, do something about that mood, ‘Boo, we could. Or not! Whatever you’re comfortable with, I don’t wanna push you! We could just watch the movie!” Tubbo was hesitant to offer; not because he didn’t want to help Ranboo with his mood, oh no, he just didn’t wanna make him uncomfortable, or make him feel like he had to.

At the offer, Ranboo felt his face heat up. Wow, and to think that he could have just gotten that so easily. Ranboo pushed the mildly self-deprecating thought away, and shyly nodded in response, hiding his face in his hands. Tommy, still confused as ever, just watched their interaction, not saying anything.

Tubbo gently pulled one of Ranboo’s hands away from his face, offering him a reassuring smile.

“Is it alright if I explain to Tommy, ‘Boo? You know he would never judge you.” Ranboo looked away and nervously bit his lip, but nodded after a few moment’s hesitation, pulling his hand back. Tommy looked between the two, his confused expression growing concerned, both because he was worried this “mood” Ranboo was in was something bad, and because Ranboo had thought that he would judge him for it. Tubbo noticed Tommy’s concern, however, and was quick to set him straight as he guided Ranboo to lay down on the bed of his back. 

“Don’t worry, Toms, it's nothing bad. Ranboo explained it to me over Discord one night. I’m pretty sure he called it a ‘lee mood,’ which basically just means that he's in the mood to be tickled!” Tubbo didn’t miss the flustered squeak that Ranboo let out when he said the word, and smiled fondly at him, even though Ranboo couldn’t see it, since he was covering his face. 

Tommy, upon hearing that indeed nothing was wrong and this “mood” was something as sweet and innocent as that, instantly lit up. 

“Awe, Ranboo, that's so sweet! There's nothing wrong with that at all! You want us to tickle you, big man? Is that alright?” Ranboo squeaked again, and thought this just may be the most flustered he's ever been, but it’s not a bad feeling. Definitely not. 

He couldn’t even attempt to hide how happy Tommy’s positive response made him, and at the light, teasing tone in Tommy’s voice towards the end sent tingles down his spine. Unable to find his words, Ranboo just nodded in response, curling up slightly. He let out yet another squeak as he felt someone’s hands on his sides, unable to hold in his anticipatory giggles even though the hands weren’t even moving yet. He shyly peaked out from behind his hands to see who had placed their hands on him, only to immediately hide again as the other two cooed at his reaction. 

“Giggling already, ‘Boo? I haven’t even done anything!” Ranboo shook his head in response, his giggles heightening in pitch. 

“Dohohon’t tehehease!” Tubbo pouted playfully at Ranboo, not that he could see him.

“Awe, why not? It's fun teasing you, because I get to see your adorable little flush and hear your sweet giggles!” Ranboo only whined louder, causing both lers to laugh. 

Tubbo began to lightly massage little circles into Ranboo’s sides where his hands were laying, occasionally scratching his nails into the sensitive skin. Ranboo, his sides being a fairly bad spot and already being wound up from the teasing and anticipation, let out an embarrassingly loud squeal, arching his back.

“Whoa, did you see that Toms? His sides must be sooo ticklish!” Tubbo snickered. 

As much as he was enjoying watching Tubbo tickle Ranboo to bits, Tommy decided he was bored of just watching, and would find a spot as well. After a couple moments of consideration, Tommy fluttered his fingers over Ranboo’s neck, gasping excitedly at the squeaky giggles the spot produced. Ranboo shook his head back and forth and scrunched up his shoulders, still keeping his hands over his face. 

“C’mon, ‘Boo, stay still for me, yeah? It’s hard for me to tickle you when you’re moving around all over the place.” 

Ranboo still couldn’t believe this was actually happening, it had been such a long time since he’d been tickled, he honestly wasn’t sure where he was ticklish, or even if he was ticklish at all anymore. 

So when Tommy’s fingers glided over his ears by accident, even he was surprised by the shrill shriek that he let out. The sound startled the other two into stopping for a moment, and Ranboo felt himself flush darker. He was about to start apologising when suddenly Tommy’s fingers were back to his ears, tracing his nails around the shells of them. 

“Holy shit ‘Boo, I didn’t even know someone’s ears could be so ticklish,” Tommy giggled. 

“SHUHut uhuhuhup!” Ranboo’s plea fell on deaf ears, as Tubbo picked up his tickling at Ranboo’s sides. 

“No fair! How come Tommy gets the good spot?” Tubbo playfully complained, a childish pout on his face. Tommy let out his signature barking laugh, and stuck his tongue out at the other. 

“Sucks to suck, bitch boy!” Tubbo just huffed in response, deciding to try out a different spot; maybe he could find a spot worse than his ears. 

Ranboo would normally laugh at them and play along with their childish antics, but something about how they were talking about tickling him so casually was extremely flustering to him.

“Guhuhuys! NohoHOHO!” Tubbo’s fingers had pressed into the divots between Ranboo’s ribs, vibrating them in place. Ranboo threw his head back in laughter, his hands finally leaving his face to instead latch onto Tubbo’s wrists, though he didn’t push them away. 

Tubbo grinned victoriously, flashing Tommy a cocky smirk as Ranboo began kicking his legs out underneath him. Tommy just growled in response, immediately searching for a new spot. He experimentally squeezed at Ranboo’s thigh, being rewarded with another hiccup, but not much else. Tommy pouted as Tubbo cackled at him, narrowing his eyes at the shorter.

“‘Sucks to suck,’ huh Toms?” Tubbo mocked, eyes lighting up as he reached Ranboo’s upper ribs, causing Ranboo to let out a louder hiccup than the others and a squeak. 

Ranboo couldn’t even attempt to form proper words now, between how hard he was laughing and how flustered he was, and he was enjoying every second of it. After a bit longer, Tubbo began to slow down his fingers, allowing Ranboo to take a breather. 

As Ranboo began to recover, Tommy smirked as he got an idea. He gracelessly shoved Tubbo off of Ranboo, earning him an undignified squawk from the shorter, before he sat himself on Ranboo’s hips and unleashed all ten of his fingers along his belly. 

Ranboo jolted like he was electrocuted, not expecting the sudden attack, before snorting and falling into loud belly laughter. As Tommy crowed victoriously, Tubbo couldn’t even bring himself to be upset that he lost their little ‘competition,’ instantly cooing at Ranboo. 

“Awwe, does someone have a ticklish belly?” After a moment of violent thrashing, Ranboo went limp, and just accepted his fate. Even though he was laughing so hard his belly was starting to hurt, and he could feel tears prickling in the corners of his eyes, he couldn’t deny how good this felt. To be so carefree around his friends, not even trying to muffle or contain his reactions as he snorted and laughed to his heart's content. 

“NAHAHAHA- *snort* T-TOHOHOMS!” Tommy laughed as his name was called out, pulling his hands away from Ranboo’s belly, flopping on the bed next to him. Tubbo climbed back up on the bed as well, laying himself across the other two. Tommy grunted from Tubbo’s weight being added onto him, and pulled Ranboo into his arms, rubbing his back soothingly. Ranboo buried his face into Tubbo’s hair, trying to regulate his breathing. After a minute of comfortable (almost) silence and Ranboo’s giggling still hadn’t let up, Tubbo laughed, rubbing his shoulder. 

“You alright, Boo?” Ranboo nodded, his head falling back against the bed, taking deep breaths.

“Y-yeahahaha, I’m goohohod.” Tommy fondly rolled his eyes as the giggling still didn’t completely stop, pulling the two closer to him. Tubbo shifted around, wrapping himself around Ranboo, before relaxing and closing his eyes. The only two followed shortly after him.

“Softyinnit.”

“Shut the fuck up Tubbo.” 

[thejustmaiden]

So out of nowhere I was tagged and quoted by a SR shipper for a blog of mine posted in August of last year. Talk about throwback but, hey, gotta appreciate that level of snooping. 😉

Back in the day I actually used to encourage discourse amongst Inuyasha fans- both shippers and antis alike- but I've since realized that it's a lost cause. But for you, @feministmetalgreymon , I'll grant this exception. Just 'cause it's been a while so why the hell not. haha

I want to assure you, however, that nothing you say will ever convince me that Sesshomaru and Rin are meant to be together romantically or that the story intended it so. Nor will you find any validation here. You can ship them for all I care, but please for all that is good and holy while I have your attention try- I mean really try- to understand why it is so many of us Inuyasha fans are so against this pairing in the first place (newsflash: it's not about ship wars), and why we believe a romance between the two of them is completely and utterly out of character.

For those of you interested in reading this, the blog of mine in question that the above shipper mentions in their counter-argument is here for reference. It's titled "Jaken = Rin's Dad?" I'm going to try and keep this short, but I'm also making no such promises. After all, I'm not exactly known for my brevity. haha Now let's get crackin'!

Like you, feministmetalgreymon, did for your recent blog here where you took screenshots of mine to address certain parts, I will be doing the same and dissecting yours accordingly.

[Snippet 1]

I worked with kids for many years as a teacher, and many people in my family have too or still do. Two of them happen to be just over 5 feet which is quite short for the average adult woman living here. I've also worked alongside many a women of short stature, and never did I hear any of them complaining of issues with their students having difficulty differentiating them from their own peers just because they were short as well. I'm sorry but that's just ridiculous. Kids are quite smart and pick up on a lot more than you seem to give them credit for. Height is not the only characteristic they look at to determine who's an adult and who's not, and it's foolish to suggest otherwise. So unless you're a babysitter who's still in their teens and/or who has very childlike features or behavior then I'm afraid what you're getting at is total hogwash. This is just another example of how you shippers offer nothing of real substance to your reasoning, it's only ever cherry-picking or strawmanning from you guys. Stop deflecting from the real issues please, because this certainly isn't one and only winds up being a complete waste of time for all parties involved.

[Snippet 2]

Okay, calm down now. I wasn't insinuating that relationships between parents and children can't change over time in terms of how they get along. Of course that's possible, as all families experience their fair share of estrangement and abuse. What I was speaking about was in reference to the overall dynamic between the two. Because a bad mother or father can still be viewed as a parental figure to their child even if say they're not in said child's life anymore. Since Sesshomaru and Rin share a healthy bond- and just a friendly reminder that in my blog I even said that he doesn't have to necessarily be labeled her father but that a romantic relationship later would still be inappropriate- I didn't deem it necessary to address what you brought up. Plus, it kinda, umm, misses the point?? Please, let's stay on topic. And it's not captured in the screenshot, but stop acting like there isn't a small part of them that idolizes their parents at some point during childhood. Just like you mention later on how it's normal for kids to have innocent crushes on adults that they eventually grow out of? Well, guess what, the same concept applies here. Kids eventually learn that their parents are far from perfect and make mistakes too. Rin is so damn young in the OG series though that we never even get to see her reach that maturity level.

[Snippet 3]

LOL! Alright, okay, so the "unbreakable bond" bit you're mentioning was actually me quoting you sessrinners. Did you not catch that? I literally spelled it out. *sigh* The whole point I was making is that shippers like yourself make hypocritical and contradictory statements all.the.goddamn.time. One moment you guys claim that Sesshomaru and Rin were essentially strangers and meant very little to each other, only to say in the same breath a few seconds later that they were destined to be together and their bond is like no other. I agree, their bond is special, but why must that mean they're going to fall in love?

That is the root of the matter here. Too many animes/mangas have romanticized this older adult man & young girl growing up falling in love trope that it's become way too normalized and widely accepted across the world- and yes, in some cultures more than others. Sadly, you lack the awareness to recognize how this all works. You know how we know that? When we see that you shippers are so desensitized to sexualized images of girls in the media that you share posts like this one below which *subtly* imply a future romance although one half of that pairing is still just a child in the pic and then try and pass it off as cute. That's like super fucking problematic and it scares me that you can't see that (or deny you do). 🤢

After all that's said and done, Sesshomaru leaving Rin in the village with Kaede is to me the strongest indicator more than pretty much anything else he's done for Rin that proves he is her adoptive father. It's so funny to me how you somehow see the exact opposite though. 🤔 What I think is happening is that you got yourself on some squeaky clean ass shipper goggles fresh out of your little echo chamber. Because I hate to tell you, but what you're fantasizing is what you want to see and not what's actually there on screen or was written into the story. I'm strictly talking about Inuyasha and the manga of course. [For the TL; DR version skip to the last paragraph.]

Parents looking after their kids is what parents are supposed to do. A good parent will do anything to keep their child safe and ensure they are cared for, so what he did for her by leaving her there was in her best interests clearly. Besides, as a babysitter, you more than most people should understand that parents aren't always able to be there for their kids so sometimes others gotta step in to help. Haven't you heard of the saying, "it takes a village to raise a child?" Which in Rin's case is literally true! 😂 Sometimes kids are even sent off to stay with grandparents and that's who raises them instead. Or maybe they have to temporarily live with an aunt or uncle because their single parent's job requires they work out of town 4-5 days of the week so they're hardly home. But that doesn't mean that the parents care or love their kids any less, and it's foolish to assume that Sesshomaru must have thought very little of Rin simply due to the fact that he made the decision to leave her in the village. Come on, y'all are acting like he abandoned her there!!

It's just given the circumstances Sesshomaru finally came to learn that Rin traveling with him was no longer safe. I also like to think it's because he wished for her to live a more normal life and to learn how to fully trust humans again. Plus, continuing to travel with him as young as she was would have proven dangerous and unwise. Now for you to know all this and still manage to turn his past actions towards her while she was just a child into a romantic gesture is what boggles my mind. Regardless of how you look at it, from my perspective or your own, Sesshomaru is in the wrong. Either he's a father figure who impregnates his daughter at the young age of approximately 14. OR he's this man she used to travel with who maybe isn't a father to her but who nonetheless basically rapes her since kids her age can't consent to sex with an adult. Idk about you but it sounds to me like nobody here wins with either scenario we're given. In other words, you should be just as mad as we are. If only one side didn't choose to forsake their morals they know we both have in common for the sake of a ship. Welp. 🤷‍♀️

I agree, incest is disgusting but that's not the only problem we have with this pairing. A romantic bond forming between Sesshomaru and Rin would also constitute as grooming.

You realize that over the years he visited her in the village that he brought her gifts too and essentially watched her grow up right before his very eyes, right? I mean, I know you do, but I really shouldn't have to explain further why pursuing a romantic/sexual relationship with each other is plain and simple wrong. And before you say it's not because he didn't have any malintent, please understand that considering their history and power dynamic up to then that yes this is still considered grooming even if Rin supposedly "wanted it" or "made the first move." Whether you consider him her father or not, as the adult who took on a role resembling that of a caretaker in her early life- a critical developmental time for a child- Sesshomaru is obligated to turn down any advances by Rin and most definitely should not initiate any himself. As the first close adult figure she's had in her life since her parents died, it's unfathomable to imagine how Sesshomaru could go through with taking advantage of this young girl who was under his care and supervision since they met. To think he could be capable of betraying that trust sickens me to the core.

This. Now THIS is how a parent/guardian or a similar adult caretaker (babysitter, teacher, etc.) talks to a child. And, in turn, this is how some young children talk to adults. You'd be insane and delusional to deny it! We see it in our everyday lives, do we not? From where else do you think our stories draw most of their inspiration? Yes, obviously these fictional universes have aspects of fantasy that don't exist in the real world, but so how then do you suppose we're able to relate to them? The reason for that being is because these stories are written by people for people, so naturally there are going to be real life aspects embedded throughout. Sure, a little escapism doesn't hurt as we don't need to take everything so seriously, but ultimately we all need to recognize that the messages in the stories we tell matter. Most stories possess a combination of both light and dark themes, but when it specifically comes to the latter we gotta be careful with how we tackle this in children's media since kids are far more impressionable.

So if at the center of a story we have two of the main protagonists whose mom is basically their same age and to top it off she knew their dad when she was just a girl and who just so happened to help raise her, wouldn't you say that's beyond fucked up or at the very least so fucking weird? Like why would we think it's even remotely okay for our children to watch this garbage?? Really think about it. Try and be objective for once and think about how it would sound explaining this storyline to an outsider who's never watched IY or HNY. Well, antis have tried this before many times and we always get the same reaction: Ewww!

Like I said earlier, if you wanna ship it then fine, but 1) please stop seeking our approval or trying to change our minds - your ship wish came true didn't it, so why do you need us to validate it? 2) even though it's not canon, respect that we don't support this sequel portraying pedophilia in a positive light. It's harmful af to not only allow but glorify the continuation of sexualized images of young girls everywhere. And I shouldn't have to say this, but just because this trope is popular as you say does not make it right. Lolicon themes in the media have been an issue forever and it needs to stop. Yes, even some people in Japan or "the East" would agree. Shocker!

We're pissed off and rightfully so because Yashahime's TV rating is 14, not to mention it airs at the prime time kids in Japan watch TV after getting home from school. That's Towa and Setsuna's age, true, but if Rin being the mom when she's like only a year older than them (please don't argue w/ me about the math- antis have so far been right every time with it) is straight-up disgusting and not something we should be supporting or endorsing. Rin's a whole ass child!! Please don't start with the "but times were different then so her having kids at 15 is acceptable" argument either, because we've already debunked that and every other single excuse you guys throw at us. Besides, how or why would you expect young viewers to know these historical "facts" anyway, especially if as you suggest fiction doesn't affect reality so what does it matter? Yet here we are, arguing over a fictional show in real life almost a year and a half into the "Sesshomaru fucks?" sequel being announced. My ass, your ass, hell all our asses fiction doesn't affect reality!

Look, I do apologize if the tone of this blog came off as snippy or condescending at times. I do not wish you any ill will, it's just I'm not really sure what you expected to get out of all this besides maybe getting on my nerves perhaps. haha A lot of you shippers have been desperately scrambling to interact with us, lurking in our tags, jumping onto our posts screaming canon and getting so defensive even though you sought us out first. We've been sticking to our tags, so how about you stay in your lane too. By the way since we're on the topic, have you seen Twitter or Reddit?! SR shippers there are the actual worst and many Inuyasha fans (not just antis) have complained of not feeling welcomed to engage in fandom spaces anymore. Shippers swarm them and scare them off simply because fans don't like your ship and refuse to accept it. It's pathetic, really. No one should ever be bullied or harassed just because they don't like something you might. We're all fans of Inuyasha, aren't we? So let's act like it. Yashahime on the other hand, you guys are welcome to that pungent heap of trash. Fans have a right to criticize it too, but if you like it then good for you, so keep on liking it and don't mind us.

I'm almost done, but real quick back to Jaken! Let's not forget about how the official Yashahime website- which came out after my blog, mind you- described Jaken. This translation isn't the best one available but it's the only version a fellow anti friend could track down. They do recall a better one done by a native Japanese speaker who was also an anti, and that member confirmed that Jaken is indeed called Rin's babysitter. So you see, I was right in my interpretation. In the original post I did compare Jaken to a brother, but after talking to others (some comments can be found under said post) I did acknowledge that he's more of a reluctant babysitter who's not related. And if he's not at least a brother to Rin, then he's definitely not her father.

At the end of the day, the creator Rumiko Takahashi has the final word. Which is guess what? Hogosha. 💖 Probably should've just started out with that and saved us all the trouble, huh? Good day/night to you.

Papamaru bids you adieu now. 🤞

[formenis]

Lesson

Anon asked: “ Can you do a scenario where L hasn't sleep in a while and it got to the point where even the Task Force is worried about him so Watari calls L's secret S/O and she comes barging into HQ and starts yelling at L that he is getting sleep or she is drugging him so he will sleep and L just follows behind her like a love-sick puppy“

A/N: please everyone, let’s give L so much love! Our best detective needs some rest sometimes.

And consider English is not my first language so I’m sorry about all the mistakes you’ll find. I’m trying to improve.

pairing: L x fem!reader

warning: nope

requested: yes

Y/A = your alias

Once Watari said: «L has no internal clockwork or any concept of time. After 102 hours of staying awake, he slept for almost 17 hours» and for him it was not enough.

If you think it's strange, well you don't know L. He goes to the toilette by himself with open doors and slightly changed sitting position. Since he likes clearness, he bathes frequently. But he never washes himself; he just sits in Watari's special "human washer" which includes drying functions.

L is rather picky with regards to clothing, there are always ten or so identical sets of clothes prepared for him. But he cannot put them on by himself…no, rather, he never feels like doing it (Watari has to say something like "banzai" to tell L to lift his arms). Most of the time, he is in his room, sitting motionlessly in that position.

But Y/N L/N knows it very well. She is L's girlfriend for a long time and she is used to L's particular (and almost non-existent) routine. That's her patience and kind personality that caught L's attention. It all started when Y/N went at the Wammy's House for a job interview. They were searching for a new teacher and Y/N satisfied all the prerequisites. During her probationary period all children fell in love with their new teacher, so patient and gentle even with the most spiteful kid.

When Roger Ruvie, the Wammy's House manager when Watari was not there, sent his observations about this new candidate, L agreed in hiring her. And when he met her in person he was hypnotised by her. The children were right, she was special: Y/N became the mother, the sister, the aunt and the friend those children didn’t have. This captured the attention and the interest of the greatest detective in the world.

It didn’t take long for both Y/N and L to fall for each other: the young teacher was attracted by his intellect and by his gaze, so deep and mysterious; on the other hand, L was mesmerized by her personality and by her smirk she had whenever she was right about something. But the thing that convinced L that Y/N was the right one for him was when she beat him at chess.

«Checkmate»  

At first, L didn’t pay attention to what she said but when he observed the chessboard he couldn’t hide his surprise. «Miss L/N…you won»  

«That's what I said»

But back to the present. Y/N was at the Wammy's House checking the homework of her little students when Roger entered her classroom.

«Miss L/N, there's a call for you»

«Ah yes, thank you Roger» Y/N answers at the phone placed on her desk. «Hello?»

«Miss L/N, it's Watari» the old and warm voice of Quillsh Wammy (as known as Watari) echoed through the receiver.

«Good afternoon Watari, I was correcting some homework. Do you need something?»

«It's about L»

.

.

.

Since the beginning of the Kira case, L moved to Japan. He changed hotel every week until Watari finished the new HQ and for the task-force was compulsory not to use any electronic devices when they were with him. This meant L couldn’t call his beloved Y/N that often and he started to miss her.

In order to solve as fast as he could the Kira case, he dived in the work for entire days and nights. Sugar cubes and coffee were his meals and he almost refused to sleep. He focused his mind and all his being to the case.

At first, the task-force wasn’t that concerned since they realised L had particular habits. But week after week, month after month, the situation got worse. His eyebags became darker and heavier, his skin became more white than his shirt and in general he looked really sickly.

«Uhm Ryuzaki? Did you sleep last night?» Soichiro Yagami asked him, there was worry on his face.

«When the Kira case will be solved I'll sleep» L replied rather tiredly despite his monotone voice didn’t express it. But Watari, who was with them serving ice-cream to everyone, noticed it immediately. He couldn’t bear such sight, he had to do something so he made a decision: if nobody could convince L to rest, then Miss Y/N L/N will.

.

.

.

«That's why I need you here, Miss L/N»

«He didn’t sleep for how much, Watari?! Are you serious?»

«Unfortunately yes. He dedicated every part of his being to the case. And by "every part" I mean literally every part of him»

«I can't believe it. I'm coming there, Watari»

«Very well, Miss L/N»

♰ TIME SKIP ♰

When Y/N arrives in Japan she was truly amazes by that country, so full of life, lights and culture. She can't believe it's the same country where Kira is killing. However, at the moment she can only think about L. She is so worried about him and about his well-being: he can be so odious and stubborn about his work that he would gladly renounce to his health if it meant to solve a case.

Y/N is boiling from rage, L went too far. If he falls ill how can he solve the case? Despite the anger she feels, she is excited too: it's been months since she saw or heard L. She misses him so much…but at the same time she wants to scold him.

«He is more hard-headed than the children at the Wammy's!» Y/N mutters at Watari, who is driving the car. With an excuse, he left the HQ to go at the airport to pick Y/N up and now they were coming back.

«Yes, I know.  It's the reason I called you…you are the only one who can convince Ryuzaki»

During the way towards the HQ, Watari informs her about the Kira case, the task-force and all L's suspects. At the same time Y/N warns him about all the new prodigies at the orphanage. The old man smiles kindly when he sees, through rear-view mirror, how Y/N's eyes shine when she started to talk about her students.

After an hour, the two of them arrives at this famous HQ: twenty-three floors aboveground and two floors belowground; Watari said there is a helipad on the roof of the building but the structure is designed so that the helipad and the two helicopters on it cannot be seen by those looking at the building from the exterior.

«Miss L/N, please use the back stairs. I deactivated the cameras so you can reach the monitoring room without being watched by Ryuzaki»

«Alright Watari, thanks»

Y/N did as instruct by him and takes the back stairs in order to reach the elevator. In her mind, Y/N is preparing the discourse to do at L: it doesn't matter if his colleagues are with him, he has to come to terms with her and starting to have a regular and healthy routine.

In the monitoring room nobody has any idea that the greatest detective's girlfriend is there in the same building as them. Actually they don’t know that L has a girlfriend either. So when the task-force see a young woman spread open the main door of the monitoring room they are quite shocked.

«Who is she?» Matsuda looked up from the papers in his hands. Shortly after that, all the other men looked up as well.

«L!»

That voice distracted L from his dossiers and through the reflection on his laptop he recognises Y/N. His lips become a thin line, a sudden rush of thoughts and emotions hits L at the same time. Why is she there? Something bad happened at the Wammy's House? Is it because he cuts ties with everyone during the investigations? Confusion, concern, worry, alarm…fear yet happiness, because he can see her after long time. L is overwhelmed.

«Everyone, please meet Miss Y/A, Ryuzaki's significant other» Watari introduces her at the task-force and each member gasped in shock.

«L! Watari told me you refused to eat properly, to sleep properly…to live properly!»

Ryuzaki spins his swivel chair towards her so Y/N has the chance to look better at him: hollow face, paler skin colour, dark and heavy eyebags. «Y/A, please, I'm not one of your student»

L is somehow relieved that Y/N was there because of him and not because something terrible happened to her or to the children at the orphanage. So he half-sighs in relief when she started to complain about is health.

«Well, you seem like one in this moment! I cannot bear seeing you like this, you know how much important health is for everyone. The lack of sleep or an unregulated diet will affect your mind and your efficiency will decrease! And how can you catch Kira if you're tired?»

Ah, how much L misses those cute "telling-offs". It is clearly Y/N's professional deformation: she worries about people and strangers as much as she does with the children at the Wammy's. So when she finishes her discourse, L couldn’t hide a wide smile.

«I guess you're right, Y/A» L pretended to be sorry but the truth is that he loves seeing that part of Y/N's personality.

«Of course I am! Now let's start from the sleeping part!» she walks closer to him and grabs the wrist. Then she drags him out of the monitoring room leading towards the bedroom. In L's eyes, admiration and love can be seen while Y/N continues with her discourse about a new healthy routine he has to start.

Right before entering the bedroom L stops and hugs Y/N from behind, his arms are around her chest now. «Y/N…you have no idea how much I missed you»

She smiles, removing her teacher mask for a moment, and looks at him. «I missed you too, cutie pie»

L rubs slightly his cheeks against hers in a cute act of affection. Having her in his arm is such a relief for him, L can sense a strong wave of tiredness on his shoulders. «Will you rest with me?»

«Of course~» Y/N caresses his dark hair, something she really misses doing. «I'll stay with you from now on»

[batarella]

3 birds 1 stone - YELLOW

To reach such a high, if it were in any way something he could touch, it was her many kisses, her soft touches, her smiles and her laughs and the little details he’d never miss.

WORDS: 7539 WARNINGS: Sexual Content, Mentions of blood

MASTERLIST | 3 BIRDS 1 STONE MASTERLIST | RED | BLUE

-----

You:

First love never dies.

For so many, it simply remains this fantastical dream. Of monsters and ghouls, fairies and witches. And perhaps, those people are right. In ways not everyone can imagine, most of the time, the realists and those grounded with what cruelties are out to get you, it isn’t always so healthy constantly hoping that the first one you give your heart to will ultimately be the last. Always, one’s immediate thought when they hold a hand or kiss another’s lips was that frivolous hoping and imaginative discourse that somehow, this is what it’ll be for the rest of your life. With that very person you chose to give your heart to and this illusion that you’ve given it enough thought, whether you actually had or hadn’t.

And those realists, those who are constantly out to get other’s hopes and irrational dreams, you never thought they’d speak to you that way until that first crack in your beating heart, the first gap made by the quakes of reality. Your first heartbreak.

And perhaps maybe the worst one, out of all the many heartbreaks you’ve gone through in your eventful young life. The ghosts of your past, the ones that never leave you alone and go on to haunt you for so long as you held onto some kind of hope, torturously holding onto that love and hurt all the same, you just let them exist. You tried to fight them, tried to move on. And for many years, you hadn’t. You failed and it brought you even more of this turmoil.

But had you really come to doubt that theory, the one that disproved that famous claim that first love, in fact, does not diminish, no matter the years and the people and the places you’ve gone through and met? Even with it so obvious that your first love came to such a disastrous, albeit expected end out of two teenagers hopelessly in love, did that love actually die?

Not when after all those years, everything you did and didn’t do out of love always ended up boiling down to him.

The time you shared, that fairytale of a story, one you were fortunate enough to live through and live by for all the years that came after, it wasn’t even because he was the safest bet, which he wasn’t. And it was unfair to call him that at all. It had its own risks, its own trials of hurt, but the triumphs you reaped, the light you’d inevitably saw at the end of that seemingly endless darkness, you never could doubt that it was there at all.

Perhaps that delusion of a fairytale was what brought you down in the first place. Perhaps all this was because you thought he, of all people, could never hurt you at the least, and he ended up hurting you the most. It was this illusion of some fantasy, one you wanted so badly to believe, that this wonderful story of how you came to be will continue for the rest of your life. That this contentment, this fruitful, carefree relationship will last and that troubles aren’t ones to worry about at all. This lie you told yourself that he could never hurt you, it was that very thought that did instead.

So perhaps it were true. Maybe first love never does die. What dies instead was that very mirage, this belief that it’ll continue to be a fantasy just as how it started. Because love never was a fantasy to begin with. It wasn’t how you came to be, or how magical it seems to someone who hears your story. It was how you hold on, how you never take your hands off theirs no matter how much the winds pull you apart. For so long as it continues to bring out the most beautiful version of yourself, love was holding on.

And for those years after your relationship, you did hold on. Both of you. With strengths unmatched by another. You held on.

You realized all that, this decision you ultimately made, a few months ago one night when you got a call from Steph when it should have been a call from Tim. But it wasn’t like you expected that latter at all. This happened one too many times than you would have hoped. But they said he was okay, just a little beaten up. He wouldn’t let the others touch him, however. That was when they called you.

You took a cab from your apartment, even when it costed a small fortune. You were worried, of course, but your hands weren’t shaking, your mind wasn’t a mess you no longer understood, your thoughts were coherent and still you could trail behind them with a red string attached to the back of your mind. All else was calm, as was the falling snow out the car window. You let that calmness get to you. You had to. Panicking wouldn’t do anyone any good. Especially not him.

You got to the manor with no one around to welcome you in save for the butler, which forced you to go straight up to Tim’s room, leave your coat by the rack. It was too early for the sun to be up, too late for it to stay that way for long. You hurried, stayed quiet, then you reached his room. You knocked no more than three times and opened the door without waiting for him to let you in.

They said he had been this way since the first incident, the one almost a year ago when he collapsed and ended up at the hospital. That at rough nights, times when his sharp eye wasn’t as sharp and movements not as quick, he refused to let anyone in for help. Maybe it was this denial that he was in need of any, denial that his lack of sleep and caffeine dependency was still a problem, or maybe he just didn’t want to trouble anyone. Though the same could be said for literally everyone else in the team. A lot of them get shot three times and brush it off just to save theatrics.

And maybe Tim was alright, better than the others let on, and it was because of that incident why they worry about him a lot more. Maybe this was just annoyance of that matter, his locking himself in his room even when a bullet wound over his shoulder so large was making his lips awfully pale and his skin an unnatural shade of white. Even when he didn’t need help, and in this case, he probably did, it didn’t mean you were going to leave him alone.

He was at the foot of his bed, back against the bed frame with a laptop in front of him, legs spread out relaxed and unbothered. Too relaxed, however, almost weak. And his eyes were droopy and low. He looked at you like he’d expected you to come, maybe even wanted to ask why it took you so long. But he didn’t say much. Nothing more than a faint hi spurred out his mouth.

You shut the door behind you and took off your shoes and your last layer of your sweater. When you stood close enough to see that the red stain on the bandage he put on himself wasn’t going to do him any good, you went straight to his bathroom, took out whatever kit he had lying around and settled on the floor right by his side.

“I’m fine, you know.”

“Shut up.”

You tried reaching for his bandage but he ended up grabbing your wrist to stop you.

“I said I’m fine.”

“You’re still bleeding.”

“It’ll stop.”

“It won't if you don’t let me take care of it.”

Still, he held onto your hand, didn’t let it go even when it loosened, and you didn’t pull away either. Instead, you inched closer, tangled your fingers together so yours would rub calmingly against the back of his palm the way he often liked.

You didn’t know what movie he had on his laptop right then, and frankly you didn’t care much. When he’d loosened his hold on you just enough to let go and reach for a clean rag in his kit, his eye trailed back to the screen. His hand, however, stayed on your lap, lightly resting on your thigh.

His way of giving in. It was one of those days, as obvious as it was. Didn’t mean you weren’t there to annoy the hell out of him until it inevitably changes, or not. You just liked being around to make sure he’ll be okay. Often, he is.

You pulled on the hem of his shirt, and reluctantly, slowly, he sat up, didn’t take his eyes off his laptop and grabbed the back of his shirt and pulled it off. You ignored that itch in your neck when he sat back down, lean abs rippling with his back crouched over.

You worked painfully slow, painful for you just as it was for him. His blood was everywhere, spilling out the bandage that had absorbed more of it than it should. You took it off, praising yourself for not taking another five minutes back at home doing whatever when it was apparent you should have gotten here two hours ago.

Like he expected some nagging remark out of you, he still couldn’t look you in the eye. And you, as frustrated as you were with him, opted not to say anything at all. You just took the rag and went to work, brushing it on the skin surrounding the wound red with the stains.

Nothing too lethal, though nothing you should ignore. You cleaned the rag and carefully, with the gentleness on your fingers you found to be present when you touched the most sensitive spots on him, you dabbed the cloth onto the wound, and with that, you found yourself sitting so close to his body, enough to smell the remnants of smoke from an exhaust pipe, probably from his bike, stained onto his bare neck.

No longer could you hear the movie that went on behind you, No matter how much noise there could have been, there was only silence, and with that silence there was that pull on your throat, one not too easily ignored unlike everything else you pushed to neglect.

Tim’s eyes were no longer on the screen, as it seemed when you glanced up to his face. There were on your hands, mesmerized by how soft you were touching him. Even with it just being a graze of your finger against his skin outside the wound, still it was this feathery touch, enough to have drowned him within a cloud’s misty bed.

It was, against your wishes, the kind of silence you wished wasn’t so deadly. Deathly silence, as you’ve come to learn, draws out the loudest voices in your head, thoughts in volumes you never would have otherwise comprehended. And there would be no ignoring them, not at that moment. And those thoughts lingered on the taste of his breath against your lips, his fingers that had went up from your clothed thigh to your cheek, brushing strands of your hair away even when they weren’t much a bother. They were on his hair, damp from sweat falling to his eyes. The smell of him, that mentioned smoke, the cologne he put on earlier that day, the natural musk of his scalp you once loved to revel in. It was the feel of his skin that seemingly grew warmer each second that passed.

You went on to clean the wound, even when your mind had long left that issue, though you convinced yourself it was reason enough for you to draw your head even closer. To have a better look at the wound. And at that, his face was close enough for you to hear the counts of his breaths.

Tim didn’t back away. He let you work, do whatever you wished with his chest without an ounce of protest.

Your other hand, the one without a rag to hide behind, finally found its way on his bare shoulder to hold onto when that hitch of your breath almost knocked you out cold, when at the faintest hover of his warm lips against your neck, the little trails of him cold on your skin.

You tried not to stop with the rag, but even that was hard to do. With your eyes closed shut, hands clenching to a fist just to have some kind of composure. Tim wasn’t pressing his lips against your skin enough to kiss it, to feel his tongue around it and send you to some heavenly descent. It was just there, barely even touching it, hovering so close enough to feel the chap of his dried lips but just not enough.

You almost clenched hard onto his shoulder when he breathed, hot against your skin, and continued to for so many more seconds.

Leaning into him would have been the easiest thing to do, to let his lips press hard onto your neck to leave marks, hand on your head tight enough to hold you in place.

But it was that knock on the door that pulled you both into the realities of what it was, or rather, what you weren’t. You didn’t kiss him that night, and since then, you never failed to ponder constantly on how you should have

That night was months ago.

Tonight, you hoped, that with every well-wishing angels and spirits there were, that with your hand on the doorknob, heart in your pocket, and breath held back for as long as it needed to be, that all this would only go as well as you’d hoped.

.

Tim:

He could smell the trouble he was in the moment she walked into his room unannounced. And only with her would it not bother him in the slightest, when if it were anyone else, he’d have sent them out his room three seconds after they’d barge in like that. She only knocked twice, just before she opened the door and walked in, thereby catching him in the middle of the untimely act of staying up past two in the morning, crouched over his desk so unhealthily bad for his spine that instinct screamed at him to sit up just to mellow down the eventual nagging.

But there wasn’t any of that, at least. “Hey,” she said, and she settled down with her jacket hung up on his door.

“You’re here late.”

“Figured you’d be up.”

“How’d you know?”

“I just did.”

Then he turned to his laptop, realized she knew because she saw his status was online, and that it didn’t have to take a detective or a best friend to figure that out. Tim stretched out his neck went back to focus on the screen. Thankfully, he wasn’t as bad as he used to, having a cup of freshly brewed coffee waiting for him at the side of his desk. Then, he’d never hear the end of it.

It was that kind of comfort, the same as having a hand to hold as you stared right into the eyes of an apocalypse or a face so beautiful to look at when all else around the world just seemed so wretchedly ugly, having her company even when it wasn’t to some necessary resort. She was just there, and her presence meant so much more than it should.

But he stayed calm, went on with his work, while she went over to his side looking over at the screen like it were any interesting. It wasn’t. Not for anyone who looked at excel files and felt the need to throw up.

A hand on top of his shoulder, however, loosened some tight knots on his arm, tensions he didn’t even know was there. He didn’t flinch nor move, though his fingers at the keys stopped for a moment, especially when she rubbed her palm over his clothes to ease even more of the tensions within him until he felt nothing less than jelly.

“What are you doing here?”

A snicker out of her proved she didn’t take that as much offence.

“Is it so hard to believe I just wanted to visit?”

“At this time of night?”

“Not like it’s any trouble, or the first time.”

“Last time, it was an emergency. I told you not to take cabs this late.”

“Tim, I’m fine. I just wanted to stay over.”

“And you’re welcome to, but you should have called. I’d have picked you up.”

Even if she called at five am asking him to take her out of town to pick up some paint or whatever just five minutes after his head would have hit a pillow, he’d do just that. She knew that right?

“You want me to come here less often?”

“No.” He leaned back on his chair, tipped his head up so he was seeing her face so gracefully smiling down at him. Immediately the sting on his eyelids that have long pained him since midnight have gone out the window. And with a smile, all else was as soft as the cloud at the end of some metaphorical window. “Stay. But come over when it’s still early.”

“Fine,” Y/N said. “I will.”

As if she heard his wishes for her to never take her hand off his shoulder, she listened. And she just stood there, silently at his side watching him go on about things she didn’t even understand. Or perhaps he wasn’t giving her enough credit. Either way, it was boring as hell.

Her finger tightened.

“What are you doing?”

“Just…” he shrugged. “You know. Work. You wouldn’t be wanna hear about any of this.”

“You’re right. I don’t.”

Just as he began to internally whine when she finally let go of her hold, to say he was soothed enough to close his eyes and just feel how wonderful her fingers felt, tangling themselves into the mess of his hair and drawing it to the back of his head, he didn’t want to be so obvious with his shivers, which were definitely there.

“But whatever that is,” she continued. “I promise you it’s nothing worth losing hours of sleep over.”

“I know I should listen to you more often, but trust me, I really have to get this done.”

“Really” she sneered. “Tonight, tonight?”

“Three hours ago, in fact.”

Telling her all this would be as useless as outrightly pleading that she leave him alone, which he definitely won't do, and she definitely won't listen to.

“Are you just gonna stand there and watch me work?”

“If it puts any pressure on you to just leave it and come to bed, then yes. I will.”

“You wouldn’t.”

“Want me to get a chair?”

“Don’t. Stand there. I dare you.”

“Watch me.”

Another run of her fingers through his hair and already he lost his streak of thought.

And it would have been all too painful if he went on to fight back that sneer, which he hadn’t realized had been there at all until he had to. Leaning towards his screen, fingers on the keys, he tried, with all his might, to just get this all done. Then he can stop dragging her along this nocturnal hell she’d come to adapt from him.

He kept working, and for a few minutes, he actually did get lost in it, even when he felt the back of his head being toyed around with her tying little braids over his neck, his bangs, the strands of hair that had grown too long. Hand over his mouth, he just glanced up through his side eye, and with her too engrossed on the braids she didn’t see him stop tapping altogether and watch her move.

Something he hadn’t expected, his whole body didn’t expect, or at all foresee even with the kind of intimacy he was used to, was when her hands that touched his neck, first with her measly tips of her fingers and eventually with her hands, had trailed down his broad shoulders, squeezing at the muscle and bone.

And her gentleness, the same that catered to wounds and held him like a faint, thin blanket would fall onto his skin, every hair on him raised, every part of him stiffened.

Every part of him stiffened. Not one left out.

She just went on. And on and on and on. Fingers down the sides of his neck, leaving faint white trails and nail marks down his shoulders and all the way back up his ears. His breath caught so short, every muscle in him so tense at the same time so awfully relaxed he might as well have fallen to the ground.

The thought of work didn’t dare cross his mind for a second after that. So what if he loses half a million tomorrow?

Those same hands, now squeezing the sides of his arms, were reeling him in like a caught salmon. Nothing else would have drawn him in so much, not even the devil himself. His fingers left the keyboard.

And just as he leaned back enough to startle her, Tim grabbed her wrists, pulled them across his neck so she was embracing him. Her stomach against the back of his head, and her face, like a bright yellow star smiling down at him from miles above, was looking directly below. Her smile was incomparable, even more so when she drew her hair back and the light allowed him more of her he never would have forgotten about anyway.

And he smiled back, made sure she couldn’t draw her arms away, then when she dipped down, his mouth met her cheek. She wasn’t bothered at the slightest. It only made the stretch on her cheeks from her smile more apparent.

Her hair, the sweet strands of daisies and lemon, pressed up against his skin as she leaned down, her face almost all the way down his shoulder. He held onto her arm as if to urge her to stay, to go further against him, to stand even closer so he could have even more of her than he already has, than he possibly can.

Tim stuck his nose against her scalp, just beside her ear, and breathed in. It tickled her enough to flinch, but not enough to let go of his tight hold.

It was mistake enough for him to open his eyes and repress all the other senses he had, the senses that mattered if he wanted to have her even more, he had to look onto the screen that had gone black, where it was no more than a dark mirror, one that stared back at him so painfully haunting.

He stared at her, holding him so intimately close, face stuck to his cheek and her lips leaving trails of her gentleness against his flushed skin. He stared at himself, and how he could just allow her to do all that and more, and not move so much as a finger, how he’d let her do anything to him, hurt him even, so long as she wanted him to.

How cruel she was, and how cruel he was to himself, to let her kiss and hold him like this, when they were supposed to be just friends, best friends, knowing how he felt, knowing how she affects him. How cruel of this world, and how he let those cruelties allow to consume him too much, rid him of any rational thought that when he wakes up that very morning and have to face the world again, she might end up choosing one of his brothers. How cruel it all was, for the world to let his hopes up, and for him to just let it. Allowing himself, and all others, to haul him straight to an inevitable world of hurt, and how for a few minutes of consuming bliss, having her so close to him that he could smell her hair and taste her skin, he was heading straight for that hurt himself.

Best friends don’t have boundaries, or lack of there is, like theirs. Which made all this even more painful. Best friends don’t hug and kiss and squeeze each other’s shoulders the way she just did. He should push her away, go back to work, let her sleep on his bed while he works away the night, and all this would be gone.

But all he did, regretfully, was close his eyes, eased into her like she were a bed of daisies and tulips and lilies, flowers without thorns to possibly stab him. Her lips, so gentle and soft, pressed themselves against the tip of his forehead and he felt her smile.

He kissed her wrist. Maybe it was a step too close, but that didn’t matter. He didn’t care. He’d get lost in her and tomorrow he’ll never find a way out of it, out of all this mess, but he’d have brought it to himself. For these slow-moving minutes, it might not even be worth it. But he could convince himself that it was.

“Go to bed,” he whispered, far too intimately against her ear. He felt her stiffen. Did he have to whisper? No. Was it intentional? Perhaps.

He got a giggle out of her, a tug on his hair, and even more squeezes on the spaces between his shoulder and neck. This was getting way too touchy. Even for them. She hasn’t touched him like this in years.

And still, he allowed her to.

“Don’t stay up too late.”

“I won't.”

The way her arms slid off him, even that felt so wonderful, against the clothes on his chest and the skin that seeped out his collar. His hands were reluctant to let her go, even to his own subconscious, and he only knew because the air never felt colder than when she’d fully withdrawn and no longer could he feel the heat of her chest pressed against his back.

He didn’t look up from his screen, but the work had long passed his head. He stared at it, everything this blank that couldn’t even be drawn, and let the silence overtake all thought.

.

You:

It was greatly inappropriate in just about every way imaginable.

Was it wrong to hold him like that, when not even you could talk yourself out of your own tempting voice and letting your nails dig into his shoulder, and lean in so your lips would reach his skin? Was it so over the line, a line you drew yourself that had long been vulnerable to a few slip ups?

Perhaps it was. Perhaps you were wrong that he might still want you the way you wanted him right then. Perhaps he did just want to stay friends, forever, and what you did might have been the end of all that. Start another fight, ignore each other for another few weeks.

You won't allow that. Not after your last fight, when you finally had it in you to tell him about Jason and it turns out, he already knew, the days and weeks of silence that followed after might have been the hardest to climb out of. For both of you.

But as it always has, it all fell right back into place. This place. This comfort not even the fuzz of a carpet laid in front of a nipping fireplace could give you. This place in his bed, and how you could just lay on it without a single shift in the air. How easily you just took off your prosthetic and showed him the worst parts of you, the worst parts you thought of yourself, and how he didn’t see them as the worst at all.

You truly did not deserve this kind of forgiveness, this kind of place with him, when you’ve had your share of mistakes just as much as he did. That silence that followed after reassured you that you cannot, even if you desperately tried to, live without Tim.

You laid on his bed, stripped to the thinnest clothing you had on and settled under the sheets. It wasn’t long before you heard him shut off his laptop, push back his seat. And with you facing away to the other side of the bed, you saw the lights turn off, then he got into bed beside you.

Then your eyes were on the ceiling, for you just couldn’t have the strength to face him, not when he was that close, and not when you, of all times, had doubts to go through with what you truly wanted. And what you wanted was him. After all that chaos, all that betrayal and hurt, was it right to give this one last try?

Tim was looking up at the ceiling as well, hands over his stomach. He was just as stiff as you.

But as easy as it was to forgive each other, it all molded back into this state of rightness, like this was exactly how things were supposed to be. Nothing to change. Nothing was supposed to change.

“Tim?”

“Yeah?”

His voice, even as a whisper, sounded a lot clearer with the lights off somehow. All you could see was the ceiling. You couldn’t even see his face.

“I’m sorry about everything…”

Some kind of click, but not even that could be heard. You just felt it. Somewhere. There was something about the air that was this sudden gust against your skin, up your face to let you know, much like a slap would remind you, of where you were.

“I’m sorry about… everything else...” he said.

Why wasn’t he turning over his stomach, falling asleep just as soon as his head hit the pillow just like he always does? Why was he still talking? Why was he still wide awake?

“You should sleep.”

“I’m not tired.”

That was, in all honesty, the first time you’ve ever heard him say that and sound like he genuinely meant it.

“I’m not, either,” you said. “What do you wanna talk about?”

“Maybe we should at least try to sleep.”

“That’s big of you to tell me that.”

“You’re the one who came all the way here,” he scowled.

“Fine, then if you don’t want me around-“

“Dude, come on

The snort that came out of your nose was not pretty at all, but neither was his own laugh that followed, one made even more resonant and mesmerizing to listen to with the darkness and the silence and how the only thing you could feel was how your toes were touching under the sheets.

That pulled you on your side, facing away from the boring ceiling and at the beauty that was Tim, how at the same time, he turned to face you as well. Hands tucked under your head, and his grabbing hold of the sheets, you were looking at him too obviously engrossed with that mistiness of how undeniably in love you were with him, even without so much as a touch out of your finger. You let your eyes do the touching. And with the way he looked back at you, you’d never seen a sight as perfect as his eyes. Even without much light, even with the details barely seen. You just knew he looked beautiful.

“So now you want me to come over at night and bug you at the expense of the company.”

“The company can afford the expenses,” he shrugged.

“Really?”

“Really.”

“Kind of unfair how I’m the only one to visit.”

“Your studio doesn’t exactly scream office workplace environment.”

You shoved his shoulder, right where the healing bullet wound was, and you heard him hiss. “Ass.”

“You're an ass.”

His laughter again. It was so easy to fall into and keep your silence just so you’d hear more of it each time.

He was closer to you. Somehow. Between his exchanges and the distraction of his own voice, he’d inched himself even closer. Near enough now that you could see his lips and how his breath tasted.

You just kept smiling, like it just couldn’t wear off even if you tried, and slowly you reached for the collar of his shirt, thin against his hot skin. And with that you found him staring down at your hand, watching you do just that.

“I’ll go to your place,” he sighed. “Take the work home. I’m sure they won't miss me.”

“Tim, I was kidding.”

“I’m not.”

You laughed and pushed your face against the pillow, which grazed his nose against your ear.

“Would you like that?”

“Hmm?”

A strand of your hair had fallen over your cheek. He brushed it back before you even had time to notice it was there.

“Me? Coming over to your place a lot to work?”

Your lips were dry. Your fists were not. You shouldn’t be nearly as relaxed as you are right then.

“Of course…”

“No, I mean…”

He moved, so much closer to you, then his hand was on your arm. The one right above your waist.

“I mean everyday… or at least, a lot of the time.”

His thumb, brushing over your skin. You never knew a sensation could be so addicting.

And your voice, snatched out of your throat. You never knew such a thing could happen after just a sentence.

“All those nights at the office, when I should have spent all that time with you, or even just answer your calls…”

Your own hand was against his chest now. It wasn’t pushing him away. It was just there, touching him. And you wouldn’t let it slip.

“None of it was worth it…” Again, his fingers brushed back your hair, but even after he did, he went on to hover them over your cheek. “And I was stupid enough to choose something else. But I should have chosen you. Always. Just like you’ve always chosen me.”

You swallowed and hoped it worked for the tears as well. “Tim, that was a long time ago-“

“I’ve never regretted anything more…”

Everything had stopped, even your own breath. You never thought so much could be caught at your through, especially all coherent thought. This cycle of a life, how it had all boiled down to one mistake. Finally, it came to a full circle.

“Are you okay with that?”

To have you all day? The way it was supposed to years ago? So I never would have had to lose you in the first place?

With the whole of my heart, definitely.

“I’d like that…” you said. “Very much.”

You didn’t even care if he felt you cry, with his hand over your face. This sense of security that wasn’t false in the least, this curtain you can always hide behind and fall back to when the world constantly would pull you down. It was his touch, like that very moment, that held you so gently not even a kiss from the kindest butterfly, trusting you with its fragility as it lands onto your skin could possibly compare.

You love him.

You love him.

You love him.

You cupped his face, just as his other arm snaked below your head so he was pulling you so deathly close. His strong arms now around you, encasing you in him, the way you always sought out to be held. Only with him did it feel so right. To move closer, to have your limbs tangled, to exchange breaths and look into each other’s eyes and see everything there was about him.

It took too long, possibly because all this had come too much to process, even with it so long overdue.

The harps that played beyond the sky and resonated only to you and your ears alone, it was all the more apparent, all the more did the songs of angels sing to every sense they could possibly pick up. It took too long, just staring into each other’s eyes in such darkness when you weren’t supposed to see anything at all, when your lips met.

The softness. The crashing waves. The sweet, serenity of silk. And the blow of the strongest gust of wind. It was all that at once.

.

Tim:

This was everything his dreams have come to remember and continue to remind him every time he allows himself to sleep. Her lips, her soft, perfect lips. None of what he said was a lie. None of it was worth losing this. Losing her.

Everything, the whole room, the ceiling, the sky outside his window, the floor under the bedframe, the winds even with the still air. Everything. Everything moved. Everything was spinning. Everything was revolving around them. Everything moved but time, the only one that wasn’t frantic enough to keep moving, perhaps even move faster. He could hear the seconds tick away but none of that even made it past his ear drums.

Finally. Finally.

One hand on her face, the other on her waist, Tim pulled her even closer so he’d feel her heart beat, the only thing he wanted to listen to from then on. Everything was spinning but he couldn’t care less if it was a quake in the fault lines. He was there. She was there.

Their lips moved like two petals of a single flower, moving to the wind’s blow and so delicately touching, not enough to hurt but enough to show the sheer amount of want that had long been held off.

Like everything, the whole world, no matter how much his mistakes had sought out to destroy it, to destroy everything he’s ever wanted, it was all kind enough to forgive him, to forgive both of them. Even with a world so seemingly irreparable, they were back in each other’s arms, in a hold tighter than ever before. And he wasn’t about to let go for as long he was strong enough to keep holding on.

He gently pulled away, just to look at her in the eye.

Because maybe, this was all just for the moment. Maybe this was just the world’s way of letting him know what he’ll ultimately lose and miss out on. Maybe, all this was just to last for the night, and nothing more.

But that look in her eye was unmistakable. So was the way she tugged on his hair. I love you. I want you. I’m yours. That’s what she was telling him. And it was everything he ever wanted to hear.  

He kissed her again and rolled her to her back, lips pressing harder, fingers digging deeper.

This. He had her. She’d chosen him. Always and always and always. She chose him.

That spinning went on, everything around them, until the world was a blur not one of them could care less about. Everything his eyes set out to see that wasn’t her body, he ignored. The sound of her breathing and whispering against his ear, the feel of her hands roaming all over his chest. Nothing else but her and her alone. He pulled his shirt off, just as her teeth dug deep into his collarbone. Her. Her. Her.

All her clothes were on the floor. Her breathing turned to moans, which turned to screams when his hand reached down between her legs and drew the sounds out of her. Then it was his own sounds, sounds he never even heard out of himself until right then, at the sharp pain just as he was inside her. It was all too slow, rolling his hips in this pace he wanted to go faster and faster but even then, he took his time.

.

You:

In every way was it the most beautiful thing to have. To be one with him. You were one. You were beautiful. You were this infinite, untouchable being.

His teeth on your neck, biting down just to hold himself up from his own thrusts. Euphoric. Lights that flickered like strings and series. Then you tried to repress all that by kissing him. It only did so much.

You were lost, so deep into corners of rooms and halls not even the sharpest eye could find you in. This galaxy you could swim into, without a tie to confine you or a cage to hold you back. Your deepest, most carnal desires all bundled into this moment of want and eventual, satisfying end, which could only be such an end if you wanted it to be. And you didn’t want it to end. Even as you screamed his name like nothing could ever hear you. Everything in you tightened. Everything letting go of what so long was held back. All the while, your arms were around him, lips against his. He let go as well. Inside you.

Until the sun came to greet you, that night went on like it was otherwise endless. That night didn’t end the moment it was day. It ended when you say it ended.

A beginning and an ending, and only good things, as you hoped, would come after it.

And in between those wonderful sessions of love, you asked him to be yours. Forever. And a promise to no longer let go.

Lucky for you, he said yes.

.

Epilogue

Tim:

“Yeah. We can get rid of the couch. No one sits there anyway. Yes, everything goes on that side of the room.”

There were three men handling the couch. The other two were busy cleaning what used to be a cement wall and was now a glass sliding door that parted two rooms. The new tiles had just been set up, and all that was needed was furniture. Which wasn’t even much.

It was hard enough trying to ward her off with the dumbest excuses he could think of, but it wouldn’t have lasted longer than a week. Today, she comes over, with it being barely presentable. But he was too excited to hold it off even longer.

Y/N stepped into his office and almost broke the knob off after seeing the unfinished construction site of what used to be just his office.

‘What’s going on?’ She mouthed at him. He waved her to come over, and after carefully making her way across the dusty tiles, she kissed the corner of his mouth.

“You’re looking good,” he smiled.

“What’s all this?”

“Something that was supposed to be all done by today, but with the wiring problem, this is all the surprise will have to suffice.”

“Surprise?”

“Come on.”

Hand on her back, he led her to the glass door and stepped into the newly renovated room, one so bare and so empty, without a desk or a love seat in sight, she marveled all the way up to the ceiling.

“This,” he said. “Is your new studio.”

He should have pulled out his phone at the way her jaw dropped.

“My what?”

“I know what I said about working over at your place.” He held her waist, pulled her close enough so she wouldn’t shake. “But I wanted to do something for you. We can go both ways. Some days we work here and some, we go over to your house.”

“Tim, this is twice the size of my apartment.”

She probably hadn’t listened to a word he said, with her still stuck up on how high the ceiling was.

“Check out the best part.”

From his pocket, he pulled out a small remote.

What was just a wall, which led to the outside, parted into two, separate doors, and it opened into a window looking down from so immensely high up the city, with the cars below the size of matchboxes and people of ants.

“I think I just pissed myself.”

Tim laughed, again, then pulled her waist once more so she could only look at his eyes.

“I just want to be around you. Every day. I’m not letting you out of my sight anymore.”

“You’re sexy when you show off how rich you are.”

“If you said that any sooner, I’d have bought you a whole island.”

Arms encasing him close, she kissed him so perfectly like those very same petals that would have wilted without their eternal companion.

“Now come on,” she pulled away too soon and he mewled. “You promised me a ride.”

All the way to the elevator, and even within, she never loosened her hold on his hand. And she led him up the rooftop like it was her who owned the place. And that smile was palpable, the one that beamed when he watched her pull him to wherever she wanted to take him. As they opened the doors up the rooftop, already the helicopter’s propellers were whirring. She’d call them before she arrived, of course. She was too excited to waste any more time.

To reach such a high, if it were in any way something he could touch, it was her many kisses, her soft touches, her smiles and her laughs and the little details he’d never miss.

Then they soared, to such heights unexplainable.

-----

MASTERLIST |  3 BIRDS 1 STONE MASTERLIST | RED | BLUE

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[touyaspeach]

i’m a little confused ab the whole cyancherub situation cause from what it looks like cassie accused another writer of plagiarism only bc they used a very common trope used in fics and refused to solve the situation privately even tho the person she accused reached out to them several times. cassie didn’t even initially reach out to this person privately but instead brought the situation out on the blog inviting hate to the person once her followers figured out who she was talking ab. and then when the person she accused defended themselves bc they were receiving an influx of hate bc of cassie’s accusation all of a sudden they’re in the wrong?? there’s nothing wrong w defending urself when someone accuses u of something as serious as plagiarism. it would be worse if she just ignored the situation so she did the right thing by clearing things up publicly esp when cassie wouldn’t even respond to her messages trying to solve things and asking how she plagiarized her and considering ppl were in her inbox calling her a plagiarizer. the fic she’s talking ab is literally such a common trope and she didn’t create it. y’all are so weird for blowing this way outta proportion and her deactivating is literally her making herself a victim in a situation she created. u can’t start discourse and then get surprised by the outcome

Hi there! I'll try to clear up as much as I can, but know that I'm not directly involved in the situation, I only know what I've personally read and seen.

And I will go ahead an own up to my own bias as Cassie's friend, however I'll try to keep this response as unbiased as possible, okay?

First and foremost, I just don't understand how this whole thing got shifted from, "this person is maybe copying another person's fics, nearly line for line in some instances." to this whole trope thing? Because that's not at all what the concern was.

Cassia knows that tropes are tropes, she's not stupid. She knows that nobody owns anything. That was never even the issue. The issue was similarities crossing fics with similar themes.

Phrases, lines, scenes, those things matching up more often than not was the issue.

And, no, perhaps she didn't reach out when she should have and that's it's own deal, and despite that knowing she'd had Rubi's accounts blocked and didn't receive any messages. But you can't police what people do on their own platforms, especially since Cassie never called anyone out by name. If lines were drawn, it was because others made their own conclusions, not because she sent her fans after Rubi.

And even when Cassia brought it up, she begged people not to flood Rubi's inbox with hate, because that's not at all what was intended. However, not once did Rubi return the same gesture. Therefore, her fans swarmed Cassie's inbox with hate. Let me remind you; Rubi has considerably more of a platform that Cassie does.

If anyone is blowing this out of proportion, it's Rubi's fans who not only flooded Cassia's inbox, but are now sending these types of messages to the people who associate with her and defend her. Regardless of who is right or wrong in this situation, Rubi's fans are showing their asses by being overly aggressive and rude. And it's Rubi's fault for not calling them off, especially since Cassia never wanted this from the beginning.

Before I wrap this up, I do wanna mention that defending yourself from accusations is totally normal and expected. Rubi has every right to try and clear her name as she sees fit, however somehow this thing got boiled down to, "tropes cannot be owned," instead of the core issue of, "this person is taking too much inspiration from my work."

I'd like to link you to Rubi's own post, including the google doc she wrote up with her supposed proof. Here. And let anyone draw their own conclusions. Again, I'm only speaking from the perspective of what I've seen as Cassie's friend. And, naturally, as I do not personally associate with Rubi I'm siding with the person I'm familiar with. I hope I could clear some stuff up.

Overall I think this situation got blown way out of proportion when it could have been handled better, but it's said and done now.

[quidfree]

just screamed over your fem todobaku it was endlessly entertaining and I’m sure to be rereading it every two weeks from now on... the way katsuki pieces things together and the absurd setting is everything I wanted and more TT!!! For prompts.. tdbk’s relationship in the eyes of their classmates? That moment in a prev fic where momo is like yeah I’m with jirou now 🤗n then tdrk goes oh me too but w bkg is forever embedded into my brain lmfaooo like what does everyone make of this insane pair

pftttttt glad it fulfilled your expectations anon i love writing half-serious todobaku pieces where they are still 50/50 strategic geniuses and emotional morons as per canon but the setting is increasingly absurd. i don't know what the context was for giant deku in that sketch but the visual was too good. date-crasher deku at it again.

as for ur prompt i do love the concept bc i live for third party pov content but i would find it v hard to get done in the prompt format bc 1) honestly a lot of the 1A students (etc) don’t have very defined personalities lol and 2) when it comes to those who do i have too much to say to do this in an hour. however i can give you some bulletpoint summaries of the BNOCs (and if you have any specific niche classmates whose take you want do let me know). with that being said...

kirishima: forever and always a supportive bestie and thus leader of the todobaku fanclub. i mean just read my fic yknow. 1000% called it on bakugous side first (and/or bakugou told him) and has been enthusiastically supportive ever since. hes a big ol romantic really and also unironically thinks todobaku is the manliest of pairings (and totally made for each other, bro!!) so hes beyond stoked when they do get together. hes one of their most comfy third wheels bc he and bakugou r very close and he and todoroki r also good friends so no one is like on uncomfortable/uneven footing and hes unfazed by the ups and downs of their relationship bc hes used to both of their antics. the secret-keeper.

i don’t have enough separate intel on the rest of the bakusquad but they’re 1) completely thrown by the revelation that after years of wheedling and trying to set bakugou up into surprise dates he is not in fact ‘work-sexual’, and to top this off is actually into todoroki of all people 2) obnoxiously supportive, as you would expect. secretly they’re all kind of defensive of bakugou’s fragile heart (citation needed) and so nervous about how the whole thing is gonna work out but when it becomes apparent todoroki does not have better sense they relax and just become excessively nosy. like to complain that bakugou and todoroki weren’t content dominating their year academically and professionally they also had to steal out 2 of the country’s most eligible bachelors, the selfish bastards.

camie: second leader of the todobaku fanclub, idc. clocks it ahead of literally anyone else in their friend group bc she just, like, got that vibe, you know? theres a multitude of equally blunt and inappropriate ways in which she addresses this vibe (calling them out in person when theyre years away from it, trying to not especially artfully orchestrate a get-together, etc) and they are all very unsuccessful. shes ‘lowkey mad bakugou stole her potential man’ but ‘finders keepers’ so once they’re past that she’s all for it since she correctly thinks they r freaks best suited to e/o and also honestly probably thinks bl is cute or something. todoroki and bakugou both endure her encouragement very long-sufferingly. big double dater energy.

yaoyorozu: not at all in the first to clock gang, bc honestly the idea she has of todoroki is still a lil idealized/inaccurate and certainly does not involve dating bakugou; the initial reveal is inevitably delivered very casually to her as she scrambles for a polite reaction. she’s kind of wary of the whole thing at face value but close scrutiny leads her to conclude they’re actually not-terrible together. upon reaching this conclusion she begins making earnest overtures towards a very confused bakugou bc she figures she may as well make the effort to get to know him better. i always hc her as having had a crush of some variety on todoroki at some point so theres probs a bit of wistfulness involved and also a far larger ‘nvm dodged that bullet’ energy bc todobaku r romantically a mess and a half. to her despair she is extremely weak to camie’s todobaku gossip.

uraraka: to everyone’s vague bewilderment, a secret todobaku stan from the get-go. you could say this is bc it leaves deku solidly open but honestly she just has similarly odd friendships with todoroki and bakugou and it’s like a persistent guilty thought of hers that they’re kind of well-suited somehow. she often tells todoroki he can do better just to wind bakugou up but would be the first to take bakugou’s side if he actually did. she really enjoys them together bc she finds somehow they’re easier to tease- it humanizes them both further to be weak to dumb emotions. she plays counsellor sometimes but like subtly bc she knows better than to give outright advice.

iida: completely blindsided by the information, also spends several months in the grips of insomnia convinced that both their friend group and japan are doomed given the inevitable dramatic breakup. then he spends a singular day hanging around them at work or something and realises that his imagined version of them as a couple was in fact completely off-base bc they’re just overly intense workaholics who are too single-focused to ever bother splitting up. also top 1 most likely friend to launch into a completely sincere defense of them and their relationship in response to like the laziest off-color paparazzi bait comment.

midoriya: where to begin honestly. he def gets weird vibes from them throughout the whole usual melodrama but 200% does not come to the right conclusions. when he finally gets the news broken to him (never gently) his brain breaks a little. it’s mainly the bakugou element bc kacchan is.. kacchan and like.. not necessarily fundamentally someone midoriya has ever imagined harboring human interest in another living person. also todoroki in a parallel way has always struck him as resoundingly disinterested in relationships mainly bc hes kind of above them. of course once he sets to theorising he can connect some dots to bakugous various jealousies over the years and also todorokis pretty open staring and wow he is not very good at connecting dots actually. anyways once he recovers from the shock i think theres a variety of ways in which he takes it bc honestly it is very weird that his best friend and his .. closest friend (?) who have always primarily interacted through or due to him now have this competing private relationship. regardless obv he is intensely supportive in like, the typical kind of overbearing midoriya way. i sometimes make it so its just one of those things that everyones cool with but also the details will always be something midoriya and bakugou do not want midoriya to know bc Awkward, vs other times i make him super cool w it to the extent that hes just overenthusiastic and todorokis all oh. sure. thanks :) while bakugou loses his shit. he does genuinely think they’re a really good fit upon reflexion, and since he’s best suited to knowing why he’s p much always correct in his assessments. its one of those things where each duo in the trio has the capacity of playing up the subject matter to the third party’s detriment, tho when todoroki is the third party he’s less embarrassed by bakudeku’s todobaku discourse and more enduring their various bizarre friendship rituals + the serious physical damage they usually precede.

also aizawa clocks them first and is like oh god please no this is going to take at least 5 years to implode and will age me 10 years in the process