#the flow in the first drafts was SO WEIRD it just took so much time trying to figure out what was wrong

[kudouusagi]

Would you say that Bucchigiri is Utsumi's sophomore slump (coming off of SK8)? I was hoping for so much from this one, and yet it seemed like she and Taku Kishimoto were making so many wrong decisions here during its production. MAPPA's influence probably didn't help matters either.

Well, according to Utsumi from the Spoon 2.di article I read, she didn't really know what to make with this one so it was kind of a group project. She really wanted to make SK8 and she asked for pretty much all the staff that worked with her on it personally. It was very much a passion project for her.

For this one this one she said she was already making SK8 and didn't know what to make when they asked her to make another original series, so she discussed it with the producers at MAPPA and they all agreed on a yanki show, and then it took them a long time to decide on the Arabian Nights theme after that. She suggested a few different ideas and the other producers decided they liked the Arabian Nights theme best. She was assigned Kishimoto to be the writer, but she hadn't met him before. Things like that.

Here's something from the interview with Kishimoto in Spoon 2.di 107

Q: Kishimoto-san, it seems that you initially proposed a bit cooler story but Utsumi-san asked you to add some comedy to it. How did you feel when you heard that request? A: If I had to say, I've had a lot more work reorganizing and rearranging the structure of manga to adapt it into an anime. I'm not the type of person who naturally has a lot of stories and characters bubbling out of me, so when I make things I unconsciously drift toward making formulaic stories of cool heroes who always win. When I do that though, the characters I make are very stereotypical, and so when I submitted the first draft to director Utsumi and MAPPA's Otsuka-san, they said "The flow of the story is good, but the characters feel really stereotypical." It was then I was asked, "What were you like when you were Arajin's age?" I wasn't good-looking, so I figured if I just directly confessed to a girl I liked I'd be rejected, and so I thought I had to try even harder than other people. I'd give girls poems, and if that didn't work I'd carve the girl's name into a stone and give it to them, and I made it my goal in life to make that girl love me. So I told them I really couldn't be used as a reference for anything. But when I said that, they said "That's so interesting!" I felt like someone like that could never be a main character, or rather, I had ruled it out because I felt like it would be crazy to have a main character who acted like that! Since I was rejected for being so creepy in real life, after all (lol). But the two of them said it was interesting, so Arajin's weird parts became my weird parts and by adding my weird parts into him, it naturally became a comedy. So, rather than trying to write a comedy or making it become a comedy, I just added my own silly parts in order to give the character a personality, and it ended up developing into that because of the character's personality.

So the whole reason Arajin is who he is (someone everyone hates lol....) is because he's based off Kishimoto himself. I don't know what the story was like before but I really can't agree the flow of the story is good now... but yeah.... that's how we ended up here.

[arlertdarling]

tldr: i’m cancelling my follower event and moving blogs to @junovie. i’m officially back from my ‘break’ but i can’t promise i’ll be frequently active (at least not as much as i used to be), much less that i’ll be writing/posting new works regularly.

i look forward to catching up with you all !! thank you for your support and understanding <3

full original post under the cut

hello!

you may or may not have noticed that i’ve been quite inactive for the last few months or so.

i’m sorry to everyone who has reached out to me in that time — i’m not ignoring you, i’ve just been logged out of this account and staying away from tumblr in general. i plan on getting back to you all privately and individually, but if you could read this post, just so you have an idea of what’s going on, i would really appreciate it! :)

anyway, i have two announcements to make regarding my blog — not bad, but definitely important changes! i’ve been meaning to make them for a while, but only just found the time and courage to go through with them.

there’s also a more in-depth (albeit rambly) explanation to why and where i’ve been gone after the announcements. it’s a little long, so there’s no pressure to read it all if you don’t want to.

my first announcement is that i’m cancelling my 100+ follower event.

...but you probably all saw that one coming lol

i absolutely intended to complete all the requests regardless of how long it took, but it’s been over 7 months now and i no longer see myself ever getting around to them at this point. i feel awful about it, especially because i was so excited about the event and milestone itself, but i just don’t have the motivation to write the rest anymore.

to be transparent, the main thing that affected and eventually halted my work flow entirely is this weird subconscious self-disciplinary rule i had where i was ‘not allowed’ to write anything until i’d finished my old projects. this isn’t an actual rule obviously, but it prevented me from writing new ideas or enjoying writing on this blog/for tumblr as a whole for months. every time i got inspired to write something, i’d remember that i have these obligatory requests to complete first, that it would be selfish and unfair to ‘ignore’ or not prioritise them, that people will be mad at me for not doing so etc, etc.

i’ve luckily stopped thinking this way now, but that’s why i’ve made this decision. i should write for myself and my enjoyment, first and foremost. it shouldn’t be an obligation. it’s not a commission or contractual assignment, it’s a silly online milestone event that i made and can just as easily discontinue should i want to — so that’s what i’ve chosen to do.

thank you to everyone who participated and/or supported the event, it means a lot to me still, and i’m sorry to those whose requests i didn’t manage to write. even with how much time has passed, i still feel shame and embarrassment about how this all turned out, so your acceptance and understanding would be really appreciated.

my next announcement is that i’m moving blogs.

i’m moving to a new account where i have an interaction/personal main blog (@junovie) and my current nsfw writing sideblog. i might make a new sfw one for my other writing shenanigans, but i haven’t made up my mind about that one yet.

it’s nothing serious, i mostly just want a fresh start. this blog has gotten disorganised and messy, and while some people don’t mind or even like it that way, personally i need structure and organisation in order to stay sane, so my plan is to move to a new blog. as for this blog — i might delete it permanently in the future, but for now, i just intend to archive it.

with the announcements out of the way, i just have a few more things i want to talk about.

i’m currently writing this part of the post in march of 2024, but i’ve been considering these changes since around december of 2023, and started drafting this post in january.

in that time, i’ve been mostly logged out of this account (aside from when i would come to add to this post) and keeping tumblr at arm’s length in general for... no reason in particular really? i know many people have had at least one bad experience or two during their time on tumblr, which may have led to them needing a break, but i’ve honestly been lucky enough to never have encountered anything severe personally.

for the most part, i’ve just been focused on my education. i’m at a stage in my life where i have important decisions to be making, paths and passions i want to be pursuing, responsibilities i need to be taking care of... and in comparison, my time for writing on tumblr has dwindled.

on the other hand, this ‘break’ of sorts, away from tumblr, has helped me realise just how much of my time i had been spending on what is really just another silly little social media app on my silly little phone. that’s not to say the people i’ve met and the feelings i’ve experienced aren’t good, valuable or a part of my life, or that the support i’ve received and joy i’ve shared don’t have worth in the bigger picture, because they are, they do, and i’m grateful for them all!! but in retrospect, there were, and are, more important things in my life that require my time, energy and attention [over writing] and that i should have been prioritising sooner. that’s on me for getting essentially addicted and becoming neglectful, and that’s why i needed to step back like i have.

in some ways, i feel a little guilty, because i feel like, i don’t know... like my sudden ‘hiatus’ should have been as a result of some big, crazy life event, or depression or something. and it kind of was [the latter], at the start, but the truth is it’s the opposite now? like, i’ve just been happier these days... but i don’t think it has anything to do with my break from tumblr, at least not in the sense that it makes me unhappy, or the absence of it improves my mental health or whatever. just in the sense that the time i would have spent scrolling or writing, i’ve now been spending doing other hobbies that make me happy, making connections with real life people, reflecting on and learning to love life and myself. i’m far from being where i want to be and i’m definitely still figuring things out, but i feel like i’m better at dividing my time now, and more capable of being on tumblr without it consuming my life force and every waking thought.

so, i’m going to come back, but i’m making no promises that i’ll be frequently active (at least not as much as i used to be), much less that i’ll be writing/posting new works regularly, especially not requests. i’m here just to have fun, be silly, bond with people over stories and fictional characters — and whatever else i may want in the future — but i never want it to feel like a chore or burden again.

even though i feel bad for basically ghosting everyone in my inbox and being inexplicably MIA for like, 3 months, i don’t regret taking this break. i just hope everyone will understand and respect my decisions and the changes to come.

friends/mutuals are welcome to message me if you’re curious about details or concerned or whatever else, but i’ve probably said enough here to answer any questions lol. i look forward to coming back and catching up with you all.

see you guys soon <3

[bangtanficsforyou]

Enchanted

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader

Au: Strangers to lovers (sort of)

Genre: Fluff.

Word count: 4.6K

Summary: Let's just say it's based on enchanted by ts.

A/N: this was requested a long time ago but then it stayed in my drafts and never saw light of the day. Until now, ofc.

As an event manager, you've had to plan for a variety of occasions. From birthday parties for kids to promotional events for companies, all sorts of events. But never have you arranged for something this big.

It isn't a special occasion, but rather a party for and of the wealthy people. 

You weren't expecting to get such a huge project any time soon, considering it's only recently that you've joined this line of business. Thus, when your assistant informed you about this particular client, you started laughing and even complimented him saying "good one." Your laughter, however, died when your assistant opened the mail and you simply gaped at it like a fool.

You were to arrange a party in one of the most prestigious halls in the city. Not only that, the money that you were offered had your head spinning in disbelief. 

Needless to say, you'd have been a fool to not take up the project. 

And so you did, you took the project, worked your ass off for it and now you find yourself in front of the hall, the party has been arranged in.

You knew you were going to be here, but you thought you'd be here as the event organiser and that you'd be behind the scenes, just in case any problem arises. You weren't expecting your client to put your name on the guest list and then formally invite you as a guest.  

When you received the card in your mail, your first reaction was that of disbelief. You knew that there will be many-list celebrities here, and for you to spend a night amongst them, is something that made you feel jittery yet excited. 

Your second reaction was that of panic. What are you going to wear? Do you even have proper clothes for the party? Even if you do, do you have matching heels with that? 

After much searching in your closet, you settled for the red gown that now adorns your body with silver heels and matching earrings. It took you a fair amount of overthinking but you finally were able to make a decision and stick with it.

Right now, you just hope you are looking good enough to be a part of the crowd inside.

You take a deep breath and head towards the entrance. The guards open the gigantic doors for you with a smile, which you return albeit nervously.

However, once you're past the entrance the sight that greets you has your heart beating a little faster. 

The halls look stunning. Royal, even. There's just something so classy and elegant about everything around you, that it's quite simply indescribable through words.

Yesterday, you had come here to survey everything for one last time but now that it's filled with people it somehow looks even more beautiful. Although you're the one who is behind all the arrangements, you somehow can't believe that it turned out this great. 

Your eyes then drift from the decorations to the people around you. You watch from a distance as people chat with each other, suddenly feeling too nervous to walk any further when you spot some familiar faces you've seen on the television.

To dissolve the bubble of insecurity that is floating in your stomach, you eye the drink counter. When your eyes move back to the crowd, you know there's no way you'll be able to enjoy yourself without some liquid courage. 

Hence, without further ado, you walk straight towards the bar. 

---------------------------------------------------------------

Three-four shots and half an hour later, you find yourself sitting around a table with a businessman, his wife, a well-renowned music producer and a news show host. Weird mix but somehow the conversation keeps flowing effortlessly.

They make sure to include you as well. Asking you questions about yourself and your job. Despite that, you feel like the odd one out. You can't relate to more than half of the things that's been spoken. 

You simply feel out of place. 

Putting up smiles, you try not to show your discomfort. 

Adjusting to new people and making conversations with them, is a must for running a business. That way you have a better chance of landing yourself a deal. You have been trying to do the same here but somehow the introvert in you has decided to make an appearance today, making it a tad bit more difficult than it usually is. 

"Miss Y/L/N," A voice startles you. "Can I please talk to you for a minute?" 

"Mr. Henry," you greet your client and politely excuse yourself before leaving your seat to talk to him. "Is something wrong?"

"No, not at all. Everything is perfectly fine." He quickly reassures you with a smile. "I just wanted to inform you that a friend of mine asked for your contact information. They have an upcoming event and want you to organise it. I hope it's okay with you that I have given him your card."

"That's absolutely fine." You respond with a controlled smile, in an attempt to hide the fact that you feel like a giggly child. "I hope you liked the decorations and all the other arrangements."

"I absolutely love it. I know who to go to from now on for every event."

His words make you grin wider.

Mr. Henry is a man in his mid-sixties and from all the times that you have conversed with him, he has been extremely patient and kind, compared to a majority of your clients. He's rich and a well-known person in the business world but somehow he has managed to stay grounded and humble. Which admittedly, is very rare to find. 

You both chat for a little while until he excuses himself to welcome a guest.

Now left alone, in the middle of the hall you take a subtle glance at the table you were sitting at, a few minutes ago. Now that Mr. Henry has possibly landed you with another project, you find yourself not wanting to go back to the table anytime soon. Not that the crowd you were chatting with were anything like the obnoxious rich people you'd expect to meet at these kinds of events but still you just don't feel like it. It's not your crowd, as some might say. 

Deciding to get yourself another drink, you head towards the bar and on your way, bump into someone.

"I'm so sorry." You exclaim, your eyes automatically checking their suit just in case they were carrying some drink and you made them spill it on them. Isn't that what nightmares are made of? Spilling a drink on some random rich dude and spoiling their suit? 

"It's okay." A deep husky voice speaks, causing your wandering eyes to freeze.

His voice is kind of attractive.

When your eyes move up to look at the man, your breath hitches. He is simply the most gorgeous man you've ever seen. Not finding it in yourself to form a coherent sentence you simply nod.

Gosh, what's wrong with you, have you not seen handsome men before?

Trying but failing to say something suitable, anything to perhaps be in his presence for a little longer, you decide the smart choice is to just leave. Because anything is better than looking like a fool who doesn't know how to speak. 

Awkwardly shaking your head, you clear your throat and flee from the spot.

As soon as you have reached the bar, you order a drink and sigh. That was embarrassing. 

But that doesn't mean your eyes don't try to sneakily catch a glimpse of the man. When you have calmed your racing heart, your eyes scan for him. Your gaze moves across the hall and a part of you wants to make sure that you really did see someone that gorgeous.

When you do spot him, he's conversing with a couple in their mid-forties. He smiles big as he chats with them and although you don't have the full view of his face, you can tell his smile is just as beautiful as he is. 

Your eyes then slowly move and take notice of the suit he's wearing. It's probably silly but when you were looking for any possible stains that you might have caused, your mind was too focused on stains to notice his suit. But now that you do, you realise even his suit stands out. It's forest green in colour with floral prints. Not to be that person, but not everyone can look that stunning in a floral suit. But he undoubtedly looks spectacular in it. 

You watch as he starts explaining something. From his ministrations, you assume he's probably talking about the event. At some point, his eyes, along with the couple's, start looking for something in particular and it's then that his eyes suddenly meet yours causing yours to widen in horror before you look away.

So subtle of you.

Fuck, had you not embarrassed yourself enough? Why did you have to stare at him like a weirdo? You bet he thinks of you as a creepy human being with the way you were watching him, as if you were in a trance. As if this is the first time you are seeing someone as gorgeous as him.

Cursing yourself, you order another drink in hopes of swallowing down the embarrassment and forgetting this whole ordeal. 

All your hopes, however, go down the drain when moments later you hear the same deep, husky voice right next to you.

"I'll have what she is having." 

Fuck. You didn't think he would just walk up to you. You try and look anywhere but in his direction.

"What's the name of the drink, by the way?" He queries and it takes you a few seconds to realise that he is asking you and not the bartender. 

Unable to avoid him anymore, you acknowledge his presence. "Screwdriver." 

The smallest of frowns appears on his face. "The drink is called screwdriver?" Seeing you nod, his interest piques. "I haven't heard of it before." 

"It's very common." You swirl your straw, pretending to be interested in the way the liquid moves in a whirling motion, in an attempt to pretend that you aren't affected by his gaze. 

"I'm not very fond of alcohol," he shrugs, finally removing his gaze from you to receive the drink. You watch from your peripheral as he takes a sip and you find yourself anticipating what his reaction might be. For some reason, you want him to like it. 

He hums after gulping down the liquid. "It's sweet." 

"Good sweet or bad sweet?" You query, somehow grabbing the courage to look at him. 

"Considering that I like sweet drinks, I'd say good sweet." 

His words surprise you. For whatever reason, you assumed he would be the kind to like strong drinks, the kind that causes you to scrunch your nose with each sip. Nevertheless, a part of you feels delighted to know that he likes your choice.

"Sweet drinks are underrated," you comment. Although you can still taste the embarrassment on your tongue, you feel slightly at ease around him than you were moments ago. If he's willing to chat with you, why shouldn't you just go with it? 

"They are," his eyes brighten up hearing your words, feeling excited that someone shares the same unpopular opinion as him.

You chuckle at the absurd topic of conversation but nod.

He clears his throat and takes another sip. "So, what brings you here?"

"I am actually the event planner." 

His eyes flash with understanding. "The event has been organised pretty well, I must say."

"Do you like it?"

He hums. "Yes, it has got an aesthetic vibe, plus the decorations have a classy yet cool touch to it."

Amused at his response, you smile. "I wasn't expecting to hear those two words in the same sentence." 

"Cool and classy?" He raises a brow and looks at you for clarification.

When you nod in reply to his question, he hums.

"I think, everything that's classy should have a bit of coolness to it and everything cool should have a bit of classiness to it," he explains why he chose those two particular words to compliment your work. "That adds to the balance, you know? And you did an excellent job at it."

You shoot him a smile that shows that you're thankful for his kind words but at the same time entertained by his line of thinking. "Never wondered about the balance between cool and classy, but thank you!"

He rests his glass on the table and looks at you as if he knows you're not getting the point he's trying to make.

"I'll give you another example," he begins with a concentrated frown. "If the royals from ancient times had a bit of coolness to them, they probably wouldn't have a stick up their asses." 

You snort in a very unladylike manner, causing the liquid to enter the wrong pipe and you break into a fit of coughs. 

"Are you okay?" He queries, a concerned and regretful look appearing on his face.

You wave his concern off with a motion of your hand and try to slow down your breathing to get rid of the coughs. After a minute or so when you finally get rid of the irritation in your windpipe, you chuckle. This time, thankfully without the liquid in your mouth. "Why would you put it that way?"

Seeing that you are fine, his features relax before the question registers in his mind causing a smirk to appear on his face. "As someone who comes from a royal family, I always have this urge to make fun of them." 

That catches you off guard. The majority of people in attendance are indeed important in one way or another but you could have never guessed that the man you're talking to comes from a royal family. "You belong to a royal family?" 

He nods, his smirk morphing into a smile. A sweet one, if you may add. And it might just be sweeter than the drink you hold in your hand.

"That explains a lot," you mumble to yourself.

"Huh?" He queries, unable to catch your words.

You shake your head realising you spoke the words out loud. You do not need to embarrass yourself any further, Y/N. "Nothing. So is that what brings you here?" 

His smug smirk disappears and he looks at you with surprised eyes as if to make sure that you are not joking. Noticing that you are not and that you are being hundred per cent serious, he smiles cheekily. "Well, let that be a secret." 

"Hey!" You say in a tone that clearly shows displeasure. "This is not fair, I told you who I am and what I do for a living and all that shit."

He chuckles, amused by how you actually look like someone has offended you. "Well, it's not like we had a deal." 

You scoff. "Is this how the royals are?"

He laughs with his head thrown back and you relish at the sight. He's so fucking pretty. "Maybe it's just nothing worth mentioning and that's why I am avoiding telling you what I do for a living. Otherwise, this whole charming facade of mine would completely get ruined."

Squinting your eyes, you suppress a smile. "Who said you are charming?"

"Hmm," he hums and pauses for a few minutes as if thinking. "I don't know, maybe those red-tinted cheeks of yours?"

Well, shit. 

The smile you were trying to hold back disappears at the speed of light and your cheeks get a shade darker. You would have felt even more flustered had it not been for the soft chuckle he lets out. 

You try to come up with something witty, anything that makes up for how shy you are feeling. But the sudden change in music catches your attention and the only thing you end up saying is oh they changed the song, pretending to be fascinated by it.

But if you thought that your faux pretence of being really into the music that's currently being played would allow you to have some time for your brain to return to its normal state, you were wrong.

"Would you like to dance with me?" The deep, husky voice speaks, causing a shiver to run down your spine and causing your brain to turn into mush, yet once again.

You look at his outstretched palm and think. Here stands a man, so gorgeous that you think you may be dreaming. What's more? He's here talking to you and asking if you'd like to dance with him as if it wouldn't be a moment straight out of a fairytale for you. 

At the back of your mind, there is a nervous voice that seems to be worried about you making a fool out of yourself. But then, what's the point of not living in the moment? You know if you don't enjoy and let yourself be, you'll regret it.

"I'd love to but then I don't dance with strangers," you respond with a little sassy curl to your lips. If he wants to dance with you, he has to tell you his name. Because, boy oh boy, do you want to know it so badly. Want to put a name to the face that won't be leaving your mind anytime soon.

He seems impressed with your words and hums, "Fair enough."

He takes a step towards you causing you to panic. Fuck you weren't prepared for this. You weren't prepared for this at all. Too bad for you he doesn't stop there, he bends down and comes close enough such that you feel his warm breath hit your ear. "I go by Kim Taehyung."

Fuck, there goes your heart doing somersaults as if it's the Olympics.

Gulping, you blink at him as he retracts a step. The smirk on his face makes you double-check. This motherfucker knows what he's doing. 

You clear your throat before you try to put up a facade of not being affected at all. You know there is no point in it but then, if you were to let your body express how you're feeling on the inside, you're pretty sure you'd collapse on the ground. Right now, butterfly legs have more strength than yours.

"I guess I wouldn't mind dancing with you, Mr. Kim Taehyung," you put your hand forward for him to take. 

And so he does and with a wide charming smile, guides you towards the dance floor. 

---------------------------------------------------------------

Dancing with Taehyung is nice. 

With his hands resting on your waist and yours resting on his shoulders, the two of you sway gently along with the music. It's relaxing, calm and enjoyable. 

And you don't even realise it consciously but you feel more at ease with him. 

"Here's a question for you," he speaks for the first time since the two of you have stepped on the dance floor. "Back then, were you perhaps looking for some sort of stain on my suit?" 

You immediately know what he's talking about and your cheeks heat up. "Um, yes. That was my instinct."

A smirk appears on his face as if his assumptions have been just proved right. "Do you happen to bump into people and spill drinks on them a lot?"

"No, that's just what happens in movies and stuff and that's the first thing that came to my mind," you retort, defending your line of thinking. Isn't it just natural to look for possible damage you may have caused to the other person's clothing if you happen to collide with them in an event where almost everyone has a drink in their hand?

"Do you watch movies a lot?" 

You may be wrong but you detect an undertone of confusion in his voice and it makes you feel confused.

"Yes, I do," you affirm.

He pushes away whatever confusion he may be having and smiles cheekily. "Then you must know that such bumpings always take place with the hero, who's dashingly handsome and cute."

Well, he definitely can be a hero of a cliche rom-com. It would suit him."Or someone who's middle-aged and rich and creepy and thinks they own the world." 

Taehyung chuckles at your words, enjoying how you seem to have gotten comfortable enough to challenge him. "Well I'm not sixty, not creepy and I definitely do not think that I own the world."

"So you don't deny being rich?"

"I shouldn't be lying, now. Should I?"

"Huh, would you look at that, I'm suddenly very interested in you."

A boxy grin appears on his face and he pulls you closer by the waist. "I'm glad to know that."

A part of you feels like looking away from his eyes but the other, much more dominant part of you, just wants to keep looking into them. So you do. You stare into his eyes and find yourself mesmerised by the intensity they seem to hold. His orbs are simply the prettiest shade of brown and you feel like you may just get lost in them.

The music changing into something more upbeat, thankfully breaks you out of the staring contest you had started out of nowhere. 

Both of you start moving a little faster to keep up with the music and erupt into a fit of chuckles every time one of you steps on the other's feet by mistake.

You two dance for three more songs until a man who looks about the same age as Taehyung, approaches him and whispers something into his ears. Taehyung's expression changes into something remorseful. 

"I'm sorry but I'll have to leave," he informs you with a small frown. 

His words make you mirror his expression and you feel disheartened at the thought of him leaving. But it's not like you can ask him to not leave. 

"Sure," you speak with a smile that you hope looks genuine. You don't want him to know that somewhere you feel sad that the time you two had has come to an end. 

He squeezes your waist lightly before letting go and with one final parting smile, he's gone.

---------------------------------------------------------------

You are glad that the event has finally come to an end. 

You have been feeling incredibly bored and nothing has been appealing to you. You have been wanting to go home and finally, you can do that. 

It's odd but you're sure that your sudden lack of interest has something to do with a certain man named Kim Taehyung. The way he caught your attention and left you mesmerised has made everything else seem dull in comparison.

There is a tiny part of you that feels disappointed thinking that this might be the first and the last time you met him. It's not like you have any contact information of his, all you know about the man is his name. It's also not like you provided him your contact details and neither did you express that you'd like to know him beyond this evening.

Heck, he was so enchanting that all you were focused on was him. There was hardly any rational thinking, only nervous butterflies and shy smiles. 

But now you wish you had just asked him for his number, his insta handle, his Snapchat, just anything. Anything is better than wanting to rewind time so that you can relive the moments with him.

You're so lost in your thoughts that you don't notice the man who's heading in your direction. It's only when they collide with you that you realise how mindlessly you were walking. 

The collision takes you by surprise, making you yelp and you drop the purse you were holding. Somehow the clutch of the purse is loosened on coming in contact with the ground and all the belongings you were carrying get scattered. 

"I'm sorry," the man in question apologises and bends down to collect your stuff. 

"It's alright," you say, before doing the same. 

It hardly takes a minute for the both of you to put your things back together. When it's done, the man apologises once again before leaving.

You sigh, not thinking much of the interaction and exit the hallways and ultimately get in your car.

---------------------------------------------------------------

By the time you reach home, you're exhausted.

How you manage to take a shower and freshen up, is beyond your understanding but somehow you do.

You sit on your bed and go through your phone to respond to some texts. Once done, you open your purse to get the charger with the intention of plugging your phone to it and going to sleep.

However, while your hands look for the charger, it comes in contact with something that makes you frown. Confused, you take the object out only to realise that it's a card. 

Your confusion increases even more when you read the details of the card. It's of some manager of some agency. 

Huh? What is it doing in your bag and whose is it?

You flip the card and on the backside, there's another number but this one is handwritten. Below the number are the initials 'KTH' and next to it is a small hand-drawn smiley face.

You try to think who 'KTH' could stand for but nothing clicks in your brain. Not having a clue as to whose number this is and what this card is for, you decide to Google the agency name. 

As soon as you get the results of your search, you are shocked to your very core. The very first picture that pops up is that of Taehyung. 

And then it clicks. 

Taehyung. Kim Taehyung. KTH.

This is Taehyung's number.

As soon as the realisation clicks, you type his name on the search bar. After all, if his picture is the first one that Google shows you when you search for a particular agency, it must mean he's someone famous. 

And your assumptions are proved right when you read the results. Apparently, he's a very famous actor who has been part of many films and is a favourite amongst the fans. No matter what article you click on or what review you read, everyone only has to say good things about him. 

With the new information about him, a few things start making sense to you. Why he was surprised when you said you had no idea who he was or why he looked confused when you said that you do watch a lot of films. 

Once your little search is over you close the search window and with big surprised eyes think to make sense of the situation.

You met one of the most gorgeous men on earth. You spent time with him. There mayhaps was some flirting involved. You danced with him. And this man turns out to be a world-famous actor who has a huge fan following. 

What. The. Fuck.

Not only that, you currently hold the said world-famous actor's number in between your fingers. 

When this particular thought occurs to you, a question comes to your mind. How did this card reach your purse? 

You skim your brain for the events of the night and the only possible explanation that comes to you is the man you collided with just before leaving the hallways. It must be him.

With that question being answered, the only thing that's left for you to do is to text him. You don't even sit and wonder about what to text and whether you texting him at this time would come off as you being extra eager. You just text him.

You: hello?

Kim Taehyung: is this y/n?

You: yes

Kim Taehyung: geez finally

Kim Taehyung: i thought you wouldn't text

His words make you grin wide and suddenly all your exhaustion is gone. Your fingers get to work as you type out a witty response. His response comes instantly. 

It's fair to say, you spend another hour chatting with him and go to bed with a sweet good-night text from him.

Good night, it is.

If you enjoyed reading this and wish to support me, head over to my patreon!

Early acces to TRYML (02) is here.

[toushindai]

what do you think Ganondorf and Rauru did while being imprisoned together? ☕ Do you think they just spend the time fighting?

I’ll tell you what I DON’T think happens, I DON’T think ~thousands of years pass in the blink of an eye~. No way. You two are stuck with each other and you are going to feel each and every interminable second of it. Suffer

Let’s tuck the rest of this under a cut so I can just say whatever

First of all obviously I think they’re gonna have weird sex about it. Weird, nonphysical, time-jumbled hatesex. I have not been subtle about wanting this from them, I think? And in fact, back before I got “A Certain Nobility of Character” working—which took so many miserably failed drafts—when my latest draft was refusing to cooperate, I did write a little of that (under the very punny filename “timefuckery”):

But as time wears away he learns to read, instead, the ebb and flow of hate. There are—moments. Moments when he remembers Sonia—the gentle sweet smell of her, the feel of her body astride his, the feel of her body cold in his arms dead because Ganondorf wanted him to suffer and Rauru’s despair hates himself more than he could ever hate another being. Moments when Ganondorf’s scorn is overwhelming, his rage, his neverending attempts to assert I am stronger than you and Rauru remembers a low whisper in his ear claim your power if you think you have it. Time is gone and he is entrapped in a whirlwind of the past and there are moments of teeth against throat and mouth against mouth and the electric lust of Ganondorf on his knees the heat of Ganondorf atop him, pushing him down, pushing inside of him. These moments play themselves out again and they leave each other aching and hollow and sated without truly moving.

I want them to be sort of bled together like this, feeling each other’s feelings, subjected to each other’s memories. And now that I’m 35k deep into this story I’m telling about them, I am imagining the two of them getting caught in this horrible, all-consuming feedback loop of loneliness and alienation because I really do see so much of that in both of them. They are never in a position to bond over it and they certainly still aren’t once they’re locked into eternally restraining each other but like. Imagine feeling someone else’s crater-in-their-chest loneliness and not respecting it and yet it echoes your own and you cannot cannot cannot get away from it. For thousands of years. Hot, I think!! Deeply compelling. Can you even sustain hatred for that long? Or maybe Ganondorf can--that is how we get Calamity Ganons, after all--but imagine Rauru wearing down, hatred becoming a despairing sense of understanding, feeling violated by his own sense of empathy as he comes to understand what Ganondorf feels, as Ganondorf's feelings and motivations come to feel like inevitable fact and it starts to seem like things never could have gone any other way than this one.

Also though yeah sometimes they are absolutely just trying to tear out each other's throats with their teeth. Definitely.

Anyway not to shill again but @skitter-kitter ALSO wrote excellently about this and like. If Rauru is touch-starved in ten years just think how he's gonna be after a millennia or two. It's honestly bonkers that Rauru is so chill on the Great Sky Island. Though I guess Link was out cold for a while. Rauru must have had a chance to do some processing.

[lovelybunn]

lgbtqia+ headcanons !ㅤㅤ– feat. stan, kyle, cartman, kenny, n butters !

warning(s): swearing, some homophobic themes, slight mention of sex

author's note: since its gay month, wanted to post this (and its been rotting in my drafts) so here yall go, ya skittles !!!!

stan marsh .

he/him –ㅤㅤhis parents have taught him (mostly randy) that there are only two genders, female and male, and he identifies as cis. so if you tell him you use any pronouns other than she/her or he/him, and/or ask him for his pronouns, he'll look at you funny. although, he'll try and respect them anyway.

bisexual –ㅤㅤwhen he first met wendy, of course he thought he was straight, but then he started gaining weird feelings for kyle that he couldn't explain. so of course, with the help of useless buzzfeed quizzes and google, that's when stan found out that he's bisexual.

demisexual –ㅤㅤeven when stan hit puberty, he never was interested in the topic of sex in general. one time kenny showed him one of his magazines, and he didn't even bat an eye. of course, as he got older it was a lot more appealing, but he felt like sexual attraction was pretty much pointless. he rarely will refer to himself as "demi", though.

ㅤ

kyle broflovski .

he/they –ㅤㅤkyle has never felt quite whole with the labels "boy", "male", etc... he had always felt there was more to it, he just never took the time to really think about it. he found out what he was missing while walking to class. two openly queer kids had complimented his outfit for that day, "man, i love that dude's shirt!" "yeah, they're totally rocking that fit!" those simple words sparked a sense of euphoria deep inside kyle's core, yet, since he knew up to nothing about queer culture at the time, he couldn't figure out why. after school he did some extensive research on his situation, finally giving a label to how he was feeling. kyle broflovski was a demi-boy.

bisexual, masc leaning –ㅤㅤkyle never thought too much about his romantic/sexual preferences, he was too studious to even have something like that on his mind. although, one day at school stan had shown up with his hair dyed blond. kyle's poor heart pounded so hard he started sweating.. he had always thought almost every girl was pretty, but that day made him realize that boys could be pretty too.

ㅤ

eric cartman .

he/him –ㅤㅤhe has a male superiority complex so bad and he thinks "pronouns" and "more than two genders" is dumb ("my pronouns are U/S/A *bald eagle screeching*")

homophobic closeted homosexual –ㅤㅤhave y'all seen the gay ass shit he's pulled on kyle? that boy is obviously in denial. but he uses the word "gay" as an insult, so of course he's homophobic.

secretly a drag queen –ㅤㅤremember when he wore that cheetah/leopard print shirt and embarrassed his mother on live television? yeah, and the time he wore that blond wig? he has an entire closet dedicated to his craft. more than once has he walked around his room in full drag acting like he's walking down the runway. (he can't do makeup for shit tho...)

ㅤ

kenny mccormick .

he/she/they –ㅤㅤidk, kenny just gives very enby vibes. he doesn't mind being referred to as "he/she", it's just they like being perceived as androgynous. kenny is a #1 "clothes have no gender" believer.

pansexual –ㅤㅤthere have been many times in the show itself that point to kenny liking more than one gender, and them being bi doesn't really work and neither does omni, cuz they don't really have a preference, pan is the best assumption.

ㅤ

butters scotch .

any pronouns –ㅤㅤ"oh, you use xe/xem? me too!" this lil child just loves collecting pronouns like pokémon cards, butters' autism feeds on it. a lot of times, if someone tells him that they use a pronoun that she hasn't heard of, that shit will get snatched so fast, it's not even funny.

gender-fluid –ㅤㅤy'know how butters was misdiagnosed with multiple personality disorder? yeah, that was just them flowing between genders. one day butters will feel extremely masculine, the next hyper-feminine, and the next neither or both. sometimes he'll even switch within a day, it depends.

polyamorous –ㅤㅤbutters is very open both romantically and platonically. he believes there is no such barriers or limits to love, that love should be given to everyone fully and freely, without discrimination. ( + more people, more cuddles !!!)

[citrus-cactus]

Howdy, all! I can't post my art summary quite yet because it contains part of someone's Secret Santa gift, so I thought I would fill out the fic summary template created by @reliablejoukido (see her original post here!). Even though I didn't publish (or finish!) much, I did start writing again this year, and that feels like a huge accomplishment, so it seemed like it would be fun to look back and talk a little bit about what I have in the works.

First, the finished fic!

My er... grand return to writing (I wouldn't call it that, but I did have a lot of fun writing and drawing for it, even if it took 6+ months from start to finish ^^;). I love these three characters as a trio so much. It was really hard to pull out a quote I liked and have it make sense in context, so I put the summary in there... but since I brought it up in another post, I thought I'd share what one of my editing drafts looks like:

(ok, so maybe not the tiniest font imaginable, but sometimes there are cross-outs to the cross-outs and sometimes I DO run out of room near troublesome paragraphs and in the margins!)

Now, onto WIPs!

Hmm, well! That sure is a title, isn't it? ;) I wanted to write Junzumi and came up with this idea late last year, and finally started trying to figure it out. It's meant to be fun and flirty and a bit awkward, but the ultimate goal is to be kind to JP, because he (and his body) are given so little love overall. And even though JP and Zoe are not actually hooking up in this fic, it is meant to show the relationship between the two of them in college, and how they could start going from friendship to dating. There IS nudity, but it's meant to be tasteful and respectful, I promise!

Oof. I haven't forgotten this fic, I swear (even though I published Chapter 4 three years ago!). I got really excited to work on it earlier this year (flush with success from actually publishing something, rotfl!) and then let it continue to languish (orz). Upon reflection, the reason it's been stalled is I was having a hard time figuring out the flow of action, but after re-outlining it in September I think I know now what Maki needs to be doing in order to experience the emotions I always meant her to be feeling in this chapter. And yes, she and Meiko meet (yay!).

Chapter 6 has been done for YEARS, and Chapter 7's probably pretty close to done as well, so it really is just this chapter being the hold-up.

AKA, Garg Fic #1. Been mulling over ideas for fic for this fandom all summer, and finally decided to write one based on some minor characters from the SLG comics (that I didn't even read, and can't read now because they're out of print). But I AM reading the new Dark Ages comics, and I'm proving to be a really good guesser about certain details, so actually, I feel INCREDIBLY validated about my original vision and characterization, ahaha.

As you may be able to tell from the quote selection, this is not a happy story. But I believe it's a story worth telling. It's about preserving customs in the face of tragedy, and mourning, and extinction, and love.

AKA, the thing that pulled me away from writing Garg Fic #1. I was possessed. I was writing something in my head about Macbeth's relationship with Demona this summer, and suddenly (VERY suddenly) it morphed into this. Dang, but they're fun to think about. This fic is weird, it will contain one MAJOR narrative trope/cliche, and it's definitely going to be NSFW if I end up getting that far. But I reeeeeeally like this paragraph I wrote for it XD

Thanks for the template Zuz, and thanks to everyone else for letting me ramble about writing! See you again for the art roundup!

[carousellights]

The Boy With The Headset | Part 2

Synopsis: The world was always so loud. Moving so fast without any care for the people who might get left behind.

All the commotion of college seems to put Y/n’s life on autopilot. Her only safe haven being the almost absolute quiet of her dorm room.

Jisung can’t seem to handle the constant sounds of life preferring to drown himself in music instead.

The boy with the headphones who sits next to Y/n seems to blend their noises into a perfect melody.

Word count: 1.4K

Pairing: music major! han x student! reader

Genre: friends to lovers, fluff, angst, slow burn, mutual pining

Masterlist

Previous / Next

Jisung straightens out his posture as he hears the click of Changbin coming in. Changbin sets the food on the table, starting to unpack the bags while setting all the different foods in their correct place. Another click of the door causes Jisung to turn his head. “Sorry I'm back so late I was at the studio helping some of the guys in the dance department.” Chan sat in his respective spot while opening his food he mumbles a quick thank you to Changbin.

While Jisung could admit that his roommates were louder than he liked most of the time he could never imagine living with anyone else. They were very considerate of the fact that Jisung just needed places to be a bit quieter. Too much noise at once made him feel like exploding. He even cherished moments like this. Eating in complete silence gave him time to prepare himself for the conversation that would flow later.

As they all finished eating Chan took everyone's trash, putting it into the trash while the two other boys made their way to the living room. Once they all got comfortable, Chan decided to break the silence, “So did she end up helping with the track?” as Jisung was thinking of how to answer Changbins voice filled his mind “Wait, Jisung you had someone else listen to your track? Are you replacing me?” Finally gathering his thoughts Jisung decides to speak, “yeah she helped me a lot actually. Though I think I'll come with you to the studio tomorrow because I have to redo the guide.”

Chan tilts his head “why do you have to redo it? Did the guide get deleted too?” Jisung shakes his head but before he can answer he feels Changbin hit his shoulder “Don't ignore me. I'm very confused. Who is this girl?” Jisung lowers his head filling him in on the details, “also I need to redo the guide because I think the vocals need to be higher to flow better.”

As Chan clicked on a show he lowers the volume and put on subtitles looking at Jisung to see if the volume was ok. As the first episode ends he can't help but remember that he hasn't responded to you yet. As he pulls out his phone he feels like he's being watched. Looking up he sees that his friends are leaning over to see what he was doing. “You guys are so noisy” he mumbles and reads over Y/n’s text again while his thumbs hover over the keyboard.

“Dude just text her back she's going to think you're avoiding her.” Jisung glances at Changbin before drafting out his text. What should he even say? Was it too weird to respond so late to her message? Just as he was about to delete it, Chan reached over and hit send. His heart dropped. Turning off his phone he set it down turning to Chan. “Don't look at me like that ji! If I didn't send it we both know you would have just deleted it.” As the show continues in the background he feels a buzz looking down your name lights up his screen.

Y/n: Great! I'll try to get us the same spot as last time!

While smiling he types a reply sending and tries his hardest to not overthink.

-

Jisung: I'm looking forward to it

Her heart is pounding. Standing in a crowded supermarket was not her plan. Why the market was crowded on a Friday night was a mystery to her. After seeing his text Y/n couldn't help wanting to get the snacks right away. Just to be prepared. Making new friends was hard. Which is why she couldn't pick between getting sweet or savory snacks. If Jisung didn't like the snacks she brought then he wouldn't want to hang out again. At least that's Y/n’s way of thinking.

Y/n needed to pick fast. The muddled conversations were becoming too much for her to handle. With her clouded judgment, Y/n places both options in her cart and rushes to check out. The beep coming from each scanned item brings her closer and closer to wanting to leave the store. Wanting to just be back in her room.

As she walks through the door Y/n sets down her groceries putting them into their places in the pantry or fridge. Just try to study this weekend so you won't be such a mess on Monday. Grabbing her backpack Y/n sits down laying her papers out in front of her. Placing her most important papers closest to her. Y/n picks up the small note Jisung left. His handwriting is messy and crooked. Was this his normal handwriting or was it rushed? Smiling, she opens the note and puts it into an empty drawer.

After looking at her notes for thirty minutes straight Y/n realized that trying to study was a lost cause. Not being able to focus without someone else also working near her. Not even bothering to put her notes away Y/n heads to the bathroom to wash up.

Laying in bed with her wet hair thoughts just keep racing in her mind. At times like these Y/n wonders if having such a quiet apartment was a curse. There was an ache, a yearning, nothing she thought of could satisfy it. Standing up Y/n takes out her CDs and plays a random track hoping to distract her. Laying in her bed just seems to give her the same fate. Drifting off to sleep.

-

Sitting in the last class of her Monday schedule was normally ok. But normally Y/n wasn't waiting for the clock to read 12:20 so she could leave. The professor's words seemed to drag on with no end. As soon as the clock turned, Y/n stood from her chair and rushed out of the class. Walking across campus usually gave her a way to clear her mind. Yet today was not normal. The sound of the wind blowing through the trees filled her mind. The sound of her shoes hitting the pavement.

Making it to the library Y/n sets her bag down on the chair and rushes to her apartment. She needed to keep that spot. She maybe had twenty minutes to get the snacks and get back to the table before someone else moved her things. Rushing in, Y/n grabbed a beach bag and stuffed it with everything she had picked up on Friday. Did she need to bring drinks? Did Jisung consider drinks a part of snacks? Looking at the time she divides to just leave with what she has now.

Walking back into the library Y/n sets down the snacks and sets her notes on the table. Biting her lip she starts spreading out her papers. Brushing away the feeling of guilt by remembering Jisung’s note. Pulling out her phone it's 1:20 pm. Glancing around her she then texts Jisung.

Y/n: I got us the same spot!

Sighing Y/n stands up and looks at the books surrounding their table. As the seconds ticked by, few people began leaving. Maybe due to late afternoon classes. After reading the spine of the books for the second time she checks her phone again. 1:40 pm. She checks the text to Jisung. Unread. Sitting at the table she contemplated packing up. Staring at the notes she hears a small voice behind her.

“I'm sorry I'm late. I was picking up some drinks for us.” Jisung sat down and pulled his laptop out from under his shoulder. “I didn't really know what drinks you liked so I got a few.” he set down his bag on his chair and pulled out a variety of drinks. Once they were all set out you stood up and set down all the snacks on the table. “I didn't know what snacks you liked so I got a few.” Their eyes found each other and they broke out in laughter. Y/n calmed her laughing with a faint smile still on her lips. As she looks at him she notices his eyes have a shine to them even with the minimal light surrounding them. As they study, they fall into what seems to already be their routine. The faint music from Jisung’s headphones seemed to be the only noise that Y/n needed. It wasn't overwhelming. It was perfect.

As the evening stretched on, all of Y/n’s built-up work was done. Leaning over she sees Jisung playing his track. Looking at the sticky notes placed by the touchpad she sees a small note. Titled ‘Y/n’s likes’ on it is written her favorite drinks and snacks.

Taglist 🏷️

@autumn-lv

[alessiathepirate]

Life is Strange: Before the Storm

WOUNDS: Frank Bowers x fem!reader

Summary: "In his own way, he tried to keep her and her friends out of trouble. Yet no one asked him if he was okay. He did so much for them - and she was the only one who wanted to honestly say thank you for that."

OR

They both have injuries, they both worry for the other - so checking up on your loved one is a must.

Notes: English isn't my first language. I apologize for any mistake I made while I wrote this short story.

I think this one deserves a longer explanation :)

I was working on this / had this in my drafts for months - and now it's finally finished! Although I wanted to make this a series, a longer story following the whole plot of the game, I decided against it. It would've been mostly literal dialogues from the game and I wasn't sure if it would've been interesting that way. Since it was originally suppoused to be a longer story I apologize if the her in this case has a little bit of a personality.

Also, Frank deserves his own stories. He doesn't get enough appreciation.

Warnings: swearing, mentioned drug use, violence, description of wounds

•••

She took a deep, nervous breath as she looked at the path in front of her. It was dark and empty - and it definitely didn't show any sign of life anywhere. She had to admit, Rachel really left her mark on the forest and probably on the whole town. Dead trees were everywhere and when she breathed the dust in, it made her sneeze and cough.

She grabbed the bag on her shoulder, her fingers were slightly shaking and there was a weird feeling in her stomach. She wanted all those feelings to stop and disappear, so she could finally concentrate - but she just couldn't give that command to her body, because it didn't want to co-operate.

Then, after a few moments of silence, she walked towards the meeting point what was sent to her through a message. Soon enough, she saw life in the chaos. There were only a few healthy trees here and there at first, but then she was walking through the forest she knew. The green and lively one.

Was it worth it though? The silence, the walk, the pain?

Even getting the stupid phone number was hard and she blushed so hard when Rachel and Chloe asked why they need to cover for her. She didn't say anything though, she just asked them to drop her off at the Two Whales diner - yet she knew they were dying from curiousity and the fact that they didn't know what was going on with her, especially after the accident.

The accident, where she saved Rachel from Damon Merrick's knife and where she was stabbed because of that decision.

She still felt the need to vomit, whenever she thought about that moment.

She was in front of Rachel and Chloe when it started, so she couldn't see what was going on behind her, but in the next second she was pushed aside by Rachel. She almost fell, but luckily she found her balance. The next thing she saw was Rachel hitting Damon Merrick in the head with a piece of heavy looking plank. The knife - what he used to threaten them - fell out of his hand, he fell too and meanwhile he pushed Frank, who landed on the ground as well. Blood was flowing from the dark wound on Damon's forehead.

She looked at Chloe who froze from shock and most likely panic, then she looked at the knife. Rachel was still standing with the plank is her hands.

And then she jumped. She jumped for the knife, trying to get it, trying to get Damon's weapon far away from it's psychotic owner.

Damon was about to get up and get to Rachel who tried to hit him again. She was there, she could feel the handle... Damon caught the plank with his left hand, trying to catch the knife with the other, but then he felt her hand on the weapon.

She tried to grab it, but her hand was kicked away after the guy pushed Rachel away, who fell. Her fingers were numb from the kick, but she didn't have time to rest and check it.

Rachel was up again, she was about to hit Damon out of anger and frustration. But she saw something Rachel didn't. She saw Damon reaching for the knife. She saw him move towards Rachel. She was sure he was about to stab her...

And then she jumped again. This time to get her friend out of harm's way which was, well - successful. Too successful. She saw Rachel barely keeping her balance and then she felt the pain. The fucking sudden, strong pain in her stomach as she landed on the ground, unable to land on her hands to push herself back up.

She heard someone scream and gasp. Maybe it was her. Maybe it wasn't. Somehow she was sure nothing left her mouth.

She turned around. She was laying on her back and she tried to find the place where the pain came from with her hands. There was something sticky. And then there was a kick.

"Oh, for the fucks sake!" she was sure Rachel was about to hit Damon again who most likely just kicked her in the stomach.

But she wasn't sure. She couldn't think. She gasped, the air ran out of her lungs, her eyes opened in fear and realization. She hugged herself with her arms to try to get away from the pain, she wanted to curl up and disappear...

She tried to get the memories out of her head as she saw light not so far away. Fire, how poetic... - with a table and two chairs, the first one full of booze of course, but that was something she expected.

Her anxiety increased when she looked at the RV she wanted to find and she felt as if her bones turned to jelly. She didn't have time to mentally kick herself for these irrelevant feelings, because in the next moment her muscles moved on their own accord. She knocked on the RV's door, then she stepped back to wait.

She was sweating - she soon realized. She tried to explain it to herself that it was because she was standing so close to the fire, but even she couldn't believe herself.

The RV's door soon opened, the man who she wanted to see was standing in the doorway, but before she could find the right words to say, to begin with; the small puppy ran towards her, jumping on and bumping into her knees, trying to make her pet him. She couldn't however, because the wound still hurt, even if she was only breathing. The puppy's answer was a gentle bite. She just smiled and let out a small laugh.

"Still a killer, I see..."

"Pompidou!"

"It's okay. No need to scold him. He just wants to play, don't you?" she looked down at the puppy still smiling, then she looked up at the man, who was still standing in the doorway. "How are you doing? I heard what happened and I wanted to know if..." she shyly looked at Pompidou who was biting her shoelace, but this time to hide the fact that she was blushing. "you are all right."

She felt his gaze on herself, mainly on her face. She knew he saw the blush she was trying to hide so desperately and she knew he was studying her every expression.

God, she felt so bad that the only thing she can do is awkwardly standing there, waiting for an answer. She can't squat down to pet Pompidou or anything, because of the wound - and in that moment it was the worst thing in the world.

"I'm fine." the answer came after a while and she had to step back to let Frank fully get out of the RV. For a few short seconds they were just standing there, examining the other - even though she still didn't dare to look him in the eye. She could almost feel his breath tickling her forehead. "I'm sorry I didn't check up on you back in the hospital." his words finally made her seek his gaze - there was some kind of softness in his eyes. "I just thought it would be awkward... you know, with family members and all that."

"Oh, don't even start with them!" she laughed as she remembered how annoyingly kind everyone tried to be to her after they found out what happened to her. Her parents didn't want to leave her alone for a second and even Joyce wanted to go and see how she was doing. She adored that woman - especially after she smuggled some food in for her. "It's so weird to see everyone suddenly becoming so annoyingly soft with you, you know."

" 'Good to know you're alright." Frank said and for a moment she thought she heard some kind of relief in his voice. It made her legs shake.

"Yeah," the blush was back again "I'm happy to see you're okay as well."

Pompidou gave up on biting her shoelace and lazily sat down between the two of them.

"Take a seat, I don't want you to stand here all night." he kept his hand on the RV's door handle for a moment and then asked: "I have some beer in the fridge if you want one."

"Sure, why not..." in reality she had plenty of reasons to say no, but she didn't want to refuse the offer. "Thank you!"

Frank was gone for a few minutes and while she was left alone, she took a seat in front of the fire. Sitting down was still a hard and uncomfortable thing to do. She had to get rid of her bag for it and she had to keep her hand on the bandaged wound to slowly sit down and find a great position. Not so long after, Pompidou curled up next to her.

"Why did you want to meet up?" she heard Frank's voice from the RV. "You need something again?"

Her heart ached from that accusation for a moment.

"No." she answered sadly. "I just- uh... wanted to make sure you are okay. I heard what happened with Damon and I didn't know your number so I couldn't call or anything before, so I-" she finished her nervous rambling after he got back with two bottles of beer in his hands. She shyly took one of them and muttered a quiet 'thank you' as Frank took a seat as well.

"I'm happy you're here."

"Yeah, me too."

There was silence for a while as they opened the beers and took a few sips.

"The damn dog seems to like you more than anyone else."

"Yes, he's real cute." she said happily as she looked at the small, sleeping body next to her chair. "His name is really French. Pompidou was the name of a French president. It means: someone from Pompidou, a place in South-East of France."

"You really are a smart ass, huh?" Frank asked, trying to sound annoyed, but she saw the small smile he was hiding.

"Come on, don't act like it bothers you!"

"You're right. It doesn't." after he took a sip from his beer he added: "It's cute."

This time she tried to hide behind the bottle she was holding to hide her rosy cheeks. "I didn't know you- found me... cute." she said slowly and waiting for an answer she took a sip from the beer as well.

"Really? I thought I made it kinda obvious."

Her teeth bumped into the glass as she tried to not choke on the alcohol she wasn't able to swallow properly. God, she really turned a rambling, awkward idiot every single time she was talking to him.

Did he really make it that obvious though?

She didn't know him for long. They met at the Firewalk concert, where she went with Chloe to try and enjoy life after an awful part of reality. It was the day they pissed off Damon's pals as well. Since that day she hasn't heard anything but jokes, kind words and praises from him - and in his own way, he tried to keep her and her friends out of trouble. Yet no one asked him if he was okay after he kept those douchebags back at the concert or after he got in fight with Merrick to give Chloe, Rachel and herself an opportunity to run away. He did so much for them - and she was the only one who wanted to honestly say thank you for that.

She quickly grabbed her bag and looked down at it, not looking at Frank while she was trying to find all the stuff she brought for him. Meanwhile she was praying to the gods above, that her hair was hiding her face well.

"Yeah, so as I was getting here I grabbed a few stuff I thought you might need." she put a paperbag on the table with the Two Whales logo on it. "I didn't know what kind of burger you like, so I stayed with cheeseburgers - I haven't really seen anyone who hates them. Also, Joyce makes the best fucking cheeseburgers in Arcadia Bay and- oh God, I am rambling again, aren't I?"

Frank didn't say anything, but she could tell he wasn't ignoring the poetic question. His eyes were filled with surprise and adoration, and she did her best to hide behind her hair again.

"Anyways, the thought that I am lying in a hospital bed with stitched up stab wounds and not knowing what's up with you didn't let me sleep peacfully. I learned how to take care of stab wounds properly, the nurse kindly showed me before she let me go, so I-" she put a first aid kit on the table, what was filled up with all the things she knew she needed "I packed everything up and got here to check if the wound you have is taken care of the healthy way... If you let me, of course..."

There was complete silence for a long time. It made her sweat nervously and she grabbed the bottle of beer again, so she can do something with her hands.

"What makes you think my wound hasn't been taken care of?" Frank asked as he touched the place above his heart, where the knife stabbed him not so long ago.

"Oh! Well I thought that it would be too risky for you, going to the hospital after you were stabbed by Damon Merrick... You wouldn't want the cops to sneak around and start to ask questions..."

Frank couldn't hold back a chuckle. "Smart ass!"

"Hey! You say it again and I'll take it as a personal insult!"

"Sorry, kid. I really don't want to insult you in any way." he said with a smile, but his voice was full of honesty. "So, Price told you everything... You can't keep anything a secret in this damn town these days, can you?"

"No, with us around you really can't." she laughed.

"Right, so you sure you won't poison me, accidentally kill me or anything?"

"I didn't go to some fancy university, Frank."

"Yet. You could make it anytime though."

She proudly smiled while her cheeks turned pink.

"So it means you trust me enough to believe I won't kill you?"

"I trusted you with the money you and Price had to get from Drew, didn't I? You made sure Price gave it to me. You stopped Damon from stabbing your friend and now you're here to check on me- with food..." the smile Frank gave her made her melt. "I don't see the reason why it would be a bad idea to let you see my wound."

She just smiled shyly as Frank put his beer down on the table, so he could reach the first aid kit to check it out properly.

"So, how do you want to do it?" he asked as he looked through the small box.

"You were stabbed on the left side of your chest weren't you? Oh, come on! Don't look at me like that, you know Chloe told me!"

" 'Course she did!"

"Right so..." she looked down for a moment at Pompidou, so she won't have to look Frank in the eyes, while saying these words: "I think you should take your shirt off or something- I mean it would be weird to stitch you up through it, wouldn't it?"

"Yeah. So this is the moment where I insert a 'if you wanted to see me shirtless all you had to do was ask' joke, right?"

"Please don't or I'll have to accidentally hurt you."

"Right, I get it." Frank said with a small laugh. "Wait a second."

He put the beer down and quickly got rid of his shirt, while she carefully stood up to get her chair closer to his. She kept her left hand on her stomach while she carried the furniture with her right. A few moments later she sat in front of Frank and tried to stop her hands from shaking.

"Were you the one who bandaged the wound?"

"Yes."

"All right. First I'll take this gauze off and then I'll take a proper look."

And then she put her left hand on his shoulder as she tried to get the gauze off with her right. She did her best to avoid his gaze. His skin was warm under her touch and with that it was also comforting. She let out a shaky breath as she realized he put his complete trust in her, he let her feel the way his chest moves with his breathing, he let her feel the warmth of his skin, he let her see the damaged area of his body - she can't fuck this up.

The fabric peeled off rather easily, even if it was stuck to his skin from the dried blood. Frank didn't let out any noise, but his expression meant that it wasn't painless.

"Did you take anything? I can't give you painkillers if you did unless you want to have a heart attack or something." she asked as she opened the med kit and grabbed a small, clean piece of fabric.

"Who do you think I am?"

She let out a laugh as she opened a water bottle and made the fabric wet. "Right, it was a dumb question."

She started to clean off the dried blood, but she was careful not to rub the wound or the stitches directly. She had to say he did a good enough job on the stitching. The thread seemed strong and medically acceptable, and the little holes in his skin where the thread came out seemed healthy and to her relief it wasn't infected at all.

"I have to say that you did a great job." she said as she put the water bottle and the fabric away. "I have close to nothing to do in this case."

She then grabbed a towel from the first aid kit and made sure she dried the area. Soon she was opening a white package what was full of square gauze and put one on the wound.

"Keep it in place, please."

She got some surgical tape and cut four pieces after measuring the gauze, then applied them along the edges of the square gauze so it was half on the dressing and half of his skin.

"Here, that's all I can do. At least I'll sleep calmly at night." she said as he put his shirt back on.

She was about to stand up and put the chair back to its place when he grabbed her hand as gently as possible causing her to stop her movement, and remain sitting on the furniture. "Thanks."

"It's fine. Don't mention it"

"I do appreciate the things you do for me, you know. You look after me, you worry about me..."

"I do the same things you do for us."

"For you." he corrected her. "I do most of that soft shit for you."

Her face was burning up. She could feel it. She tried to hide, but he didn't let her do that.

Frank's thumb softly brushed along her hand and her fingers, but when he reached the ring one and the middle one he stopped. Those two fingers on her right hand were in a bad shape, they were red and full of small cuts, not to mention the nails. The nails were the colour between black and dark purple and they'll most likely fall off after a while. The kick she's got from Damon did a number on her hand.

"Does it hurt?"

"Sometimes." she answered honestly, her voice higher than usual.

"That son of a bitch did a number on you." his voice was full of anger and worry, sending her to a whole new state of mind.

"I could say the same, you know."

"That doesn't matter, I wasn't spending weeks in a hospital room."

"To me it does." she whispered, her throat was getting dry. "And it wasn't weeks, it was only like ten days."

And then it just happened. Frank leaned in, their lips collided and the state of mind she got to when she heard the worry in his voice overtook her. Her thoughts got fuzzy, she felt dizzy and she was unsure if she'd be able to answer simple questions after he kissed her like that.

There was no war, no battle for dominance only a silent statement: I'm happy you are okay. And that statement and understanding made the kiss that passionate, yet that sweet. It was a mix of many undescribable feelings. Her stomach made flips and her face felt hot.

Her hands landed on his shoulders as he pulled her closer, causing their teeth to collide for a second - but that was easily forgettable when his hands were grabbing her waist, massaging the area gently as he pulled her towards himself more.

She was sure she would have landed on his lap if her wound was nonexistent. From the movement her stomach started to burn - and this kind of pain definitely wasn't from the passion. The feeling got a whimper then a pained moan out of her, ending the kiss sooner than she wanted to.

"Damn it, sorry." was Frank's reaction and then his right hand gently, with feather light touches found the place where the bandage on her stomach was applied to. "Didn't mean to hurt you."

His fingers started to draw circles around the wound, then he draw squares along the edges of the surgical tape.

"It's fine." she said with a smile she couldn't hide, a little out of breath. "I'm fine."

"You scared me, you know?" he started. "When you got stabbed. It scared me."

"But I'm fine. And I wouldn't be if you didn't look out for me and my friends."

"Yeah." there was a small pause, but he didn't withdraw his hands. "So do you want me to take a look at your wound as well?"

She blushed, but this time she didn't look away. "You know how to do it?"

"I learned from the best."

They shared a smile and Frank pressed a kiss to her forehead before he leaned back. "Now, those cheeseburgers are getting cold."

As she carefully stood up to get the food she bought, Frank placed the chair she was sitting on next to his one so there won't be anything between them. Pompidou, like he felt the change in the air, got up from his place and sat down next to her chair again. The puppy looked up at her with big, sweet eyes.

As they sat out there while they ate, one question formed itself in her mind: how will she explain this to her friends, who won't take secrets as an answer.

"Would you like to stay the night?"

"Can I?"

"You can." he answered with a smile as he took a sip from his beer. "Besides I gotta buy you breakfast tomorrow."

The stupid smirk what found its way up on her face was a clear answer. So was the kiss she initiated.

Damn the explanation. That can be a problem what'll have to wait 'til tomorrow.

[lennoxlorian]

WRITING: GETTING THROUGH THE DRAFT

It’s been a couple of years since I’ve done NaNoWriMo and I am looking forward to jumping back into it full force this year. And as I start prepping with outlining, last minute research and setting up a special Scrivener file for the project, I remembered a post I wrote of the things I did that helped me smash NaNoWriMo the second time and wished I’d had these tips the first time around.

I found the post I wrote but over the years, (you can read that here) and since then I’ve gathered more practical tips to getting through NaNoWriMo. Remember, these tips are basically, to push through and get that first draft - which seems like the hardest part. How can you revise and edit something before you have something to even revise and edit, right? So, here are my original tips, plus some extras.

Set up a “Notes” file. This may seem like a weird tip. But I promise that it will be worth it at the end. The “Note” file can be a word document, pen and paper or even a Scrivener type program that has a notes section attached to the file. This will be a place where you will be jotting down every comment, note and idea you have as you write your novel. The purpose is to keep yourself from going back and falling into the downward spiral of self-editing/editing as you go. Because we know that it tends to lead to a novel in a perpetual unfinished state. My suggestion is to divide your notes into “Chapters”, “Parts”, “Page Number-Ranges” - depending on how you’re writing your novel and writing subsequent notes and ideas under that particular one. This helps you to find relevant information during the editing process.

Keep moving forward. No matter what. Don’t worry about the details. Don’t worry about changing something, even if the scene seems really long, dialogue heavy or you are describing the heck out of the setting. Don’t waste time thinking about how to change a small detail. Chances are you will probably not end up using it anyway. Just make a note of it in your “Notes” file and keep pushing forward.

An outline helps - even if you consider yourself a “Pantser”. Not everyone has an outline. For me, I LOVE outlines and mine tend to get crazy detailed. But what I appreciate about having an outline is that it helps me to keep my story in the direction it needs to go. Mind you, even with an outline, sometimes I do get into a flow that deviates from my original outline (It’s the tiny, rebellious pantser inside of me!). And that’s okay! I do suggest, even as a pantser, that you create a simple action breakdown. You want to have a clear idea where your characters are headed. Even a little.

JUST WRITE. Simple as that. Moreover - and this is important - write as if no one will ever read it. Don’t get caught up with how you think your novel should sound or even how you want it to sound. Just write it because it will create a voice of its own. YOUR voice. And that’s pretty freaking awesome. Putting myself into that mindset took away all of the inhibitions and self-doubt that I had and it created much of my best work. So write those cheesy action scenes or embarrassing love scenes. At the very least, it’s good character/plot development, it will get it out of your system and you’ll realize, later, that those scenes weren’t even needed. No harm, no foul.

Over write. Though many of the tips I'm giving can be applied to writing your first draft, this particular one is mainly for NaNoWriMo. As much as we would like to sit in front of our computers everyday or 30 days and just write, the truth is that we have lives and responsibilities that oftentimes takes us away from writing more than we’d wish. Sometimes for a whole day! (Boo!) But life happens. So over write. Write more than your daily word target. Especially, when you have extra time. That way, you won’t get behind and you’ll probably reach your goal sooner than you thought.

Stick with it. If you get #PlotStuck, don’t give up. What helped me, was to write chronologically. Meaning, I forced myself to get through whatever writer’s block I thought I had. Even if it’s introducing a new character, object or location to get the juices flowing, again. Some may say to skip over it and come back to it later but that’s how I got into a habit of not finishing novels. For me, waiting to get over that barrier - whether it was taking a quick break or a walk or reading - got me through several of those hurdles. What I’ve learned is if you’re serious about writing, you have to get through it because writing is not easy and it won’t be the last time you’re Plot Stuck. Trust me.

These are some things that helped me write and finish my first drafts. They may not work for everyone so take what you can and leave what you can’t. These aren’t the only tips I have but just the ones I have at the moment. I’ll be sharing more of those tips when they come to me. Or if you have a different question about my writing or my process or the blog or even my first draft, just ask me!

[vilyanenyavilya]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

tagged by @xottan. thank youuuu

1. How many works do you have on ao3?

14

2. What’s your total ao3 word count?

734,739.

Thank Checkmate for over half of that.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

MCU, mainly frostiron

4. Top five fics by kudos

Checkmate (Chess and Chocolate Chip Pancakes in Stark Tower)

Mischief Meets Hawk

Variant Friends

The Firefly Light In Your Eyes

The Sorcerer Next Door

5. Do you respond to comments?

yep, when it gets to a back and forth I love it!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Mischief Meets Hawk, but more bittersweet because I skipped over what would have been the angstiest part. It’s just what happens when a god (Loki) becomes best friends with a human (Clint).

7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

They tend to be happy, but I’ll say Checkmate since it took 409,963 words to get Tony and Loki there. So much happened to build up to the ending.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Had two comments that I would count, one was more just mis-understanding and one was the type of thing you delete and block the user.

9. Do you write smut?

I write more love scenes than pure smut and other scenes that cut away. Though that might change in the next fic. Firefly’s probably the most smutty.

10. Craziest crossover?

Nothing published, but in my head there’s a Leverage and Avengers + Loki crossover where the Leverage crew is pulling a job and keep seeing weird stuff happen around them. They just want to steal from the rich person and fix something for one or a couple people while at the same time the Avengers are dealing with something huge.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope. Would be fun! Someone ask!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes, back in SGA days.

14. All time favorite ship?

Frostiron, to no one who follows me’s surprise. I just love them.

15. What’s a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Look Question List, I’m really trying on Lost in Time, okay? I have two lovely people reading it for me right now. It’s been two and a half years since I started the draft, but I am determined to start posting.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue. It will just flow out, especially between Tony and Loki.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Descriptions, especially of location and setting. I have to go back and fill in. It’s my least favorite part. Can’t I just do plot and dialogue and everyone know what I pictured in my head?

18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

Google translate is a wonderful thing. In Love Language Barrier I used it for Norwegian and a Swedish speaker said it was readable. It was integral to the fic concept, otherwise I use a little here and there if it’s appropriate. Mainly for sweet names Loki calls Tony.

19. First fandom you wrote in?

SGA

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Ahhhhhh at the moment Checkmate or Mischief Meets Hawk. Checkmate because it’s my big fic and Mischief Meets Hawk because it spontaneously happened after I watched Hawkeye and needed to put Clint with Loki on an adventure.

-

tagging @poetic-fiasco if you want 💚📚📚📚

[hopefulcanary]

Do you have any drawing tips for semi-beginners hoping to improve drawing people? 🙏

Draw at least once a day, even if you don't feel like it. Artistic skill is 5% raw talent and 95% stubborn af bull-headed "fuck you I'm mad that I can't draw a 3/4 head so I am gonna draw it a hundred times until I get it right"

Do drawing warmups– straight lines from the shoulder, spirals and circles and cubes, things that get your muscles, well, warmed up. Even if this is all you can draw that day, you're still gaining fine motor control.

Copy from old school masters. I literally, 100% do mean "sit your butt down and freehand a copy of whatever famous painting/sculpture/piece you're gaga for". Critically analyze how these artists drew the human form. Why do you enjoy these artists' works? What would you like to learn from them? I'm not a great colorist, so I enjoy studying how other artists utilize light and color.

Listen to Jack Kirby's advice:

Use references. All the time. Every damn day. Download stock photos that look cool and try drawing them. Take photos of yourself, your friends and fam and draw them. Feel weird because smug little assholes cry that "that's cheating", or folks make fancy jpgs of how you have to change a certain percent of the pose/hair/face/the way the shirt is flowing on your friend's body because exact life-drawing studies are "copying" now??? References are how artists work successfully and grow as artists. So you know, fuck them.

"Stock photo [person] [action]" is a life saver for finding poses to practice on

Use grids if you need to. Our predecessors did. Hell, they used crazy things like the camera obscura to make the perspective of their paintings correct. Programs like Procreate literally have grid guides to help.

Just completely stuck on a body part and frustrated that you can't get it to look right? Trace it. You have my permission. Trace it to get the form right, then try free-handing it again. You'll probably nail it. MAGIC. This is not "cheating".

(Don't trace stuff and pass it off as yours/use it for final pieces* unless your style is literally rotoscoping, a perfectly valid art form. Like, know your work and take pride in it.)

Related to that, don't feel married to a particular "style". Learn the basic foundations, then Experiment. Do those "draw my character in [X] style" memes. Flexibility will help you be kinder to yourself. Push your limits.

Redraw old work, so you can see how much you've improved.

Everything about a person can be broken down into basic shapes. Don't feel like you have to draw all the body contours perfectly the first time, and don't feel married to your first drafts. Revise, revise, revise.

Be kind to yourself. Seriously. Allow yourself to be patient with yourself. Adults in particular are so hard on themselves when it comes to drawing, when we don't need to be.

*On the topic of tracing:

Want to know where you CAN trace all the live long day? Your own work. "What?" Yes. Good god, yes. Light boxes exist in meat space for a reason! Layers in digital programs exist for a reason! So you doodled two different pics of Bucky Barnes and you love his face on one but hate it on another? C&P that sucker over or draw off that. Make a new layer above the mess. Finesse the Winter Soldier into complying cuz he's an obedient boy. It's your vision, go HAM.

On the subject of "Originality":

Andrew Loomis' Figure Drawing For All It's Worth is a solid read that goes into the specifics of how to draw people, going into anatomy and breaking down bodies and faces into shapes and lines. Part of my improvement came when I stopped stressing out about the whole image (at least at first) and took things section by section.

It might seem a little dense and intimidating at first, but it's so much better than a lot of the "how to draw" stuff on the market today.

This is also dense af but I hope it helps!

[andromedaexists]

WUPDATE: Orp

𝚆𝚎𝚍𝚗𝚎𝚜𝚍𝚊𝚢, 𝙵𝚎𝚋 𝟸𝟸𝚗𝚍 || 𝚂𝚑𝚘𝚛𝚝 𝚂𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚢 𝚄𝚙𝚍𝚊𝚝𝚎

This is gonna be a weird update because I am working on two projects at once. But that's okay!

First up: Call Me Icarus folks. I have been working on CMI, I am now at 43k words! "But Andi," I hear you saying. "Why is there a short story banner and no CMI excerpt if you've been working on CMI?"

Well, long story short, I am not comfortable sharing what I've written yet. I have completely abandoned my normal writing style, meaning that what I am writing now is much more reminiscent of a true first draft. It is not pretty, it does not flow well, and I am not ready to share it. Once I have a chance to go over it again and polish it up, then I will share it.

CMI TAGLIST: @flowerprose @isherwoodj @cream-and-tea @touchingmadness @lockejhaven @marinesocks @wildswrites @the-finch-address @writingpotato07 @leighvalentin @pinespittinink @inkspellangel

Now, that means I need to find something else to share! I do have some of my short story polished and good to go, so I figured I'd share that!

This month's short story is a retelling of the myth of Orpheus & Eurydice set in modern times. I'm sorry that there's no CMI excerpt this week, but I hope you enjoy!

This story is sad, a tragedy played out on paper. It ends in death, just as it always has. You see, this isn’t the first time this story’s been told. This is merely one version in a sea of words. And it always ends the same way. But that’s why we’re here. We’re here because we know how this story ends, and yet I tell it anyways. I tell a tale of a love once lost, a love sought after and fought for. A love lost once again. Throughout the ages the names have changed and the faces twist and morph, but at their heart they remain the same. This is the tale of Orpheus and Eurydice, though they prefer the names Aria and Rowan this time around. Back when this story was first being told Orpheus was a poet and Eurydice was his beautiful wife that misfortune took too early. Throughout the years many things have changed: technology has advanced, lyric poets starting writing their works, Greece fell and Rome rose from the ashes, the Old Gods died out. One thing that never changed was love and grief. Those pesky human emotions that blind perfectly wise men and cause them to make the wrong decisions. That’s why we keep telling this story, why I keep telling this story. For as long as humans can feel, they will be blinded by love and grief. And so I will be here, gifting caution through tragedy.

Taglist:

@inkspellangel @cljordan-imperium

Please fill out this form to be added or ask to be removed!

[souryogurt64]

Diff anon here! Sorry if we’re beyond this convo but I wanted to share some further thoughts about Joe’s book. (And as a former creative writing major, this will be more about form than content)

Generally I think there was an impasse between expectation and delivery. Like Joe has a really strong voice (cringey at points obvi, but highly specific and clearly very personal) but when you cut out really being able to talk about the band in order to protect their privacy you end up with a lack of content that leads to a lot of redundancies. It makes perfect sense to me that he would want to avoid sensitive topics within the band either out of respect for his friends or by request but when you can’t talk about the biggest aspect of your life for the last 20 years you’re not exactly giving yourself a lot to work with.

Beyond the content gaps, and let’s say “immature” style, I think there was a pretty serious miscommunication gap between writer and editor.

Like, tbh, it felt like a first draft was published. And I don’t necessarily mean that to insult Joe, because all first drafts are bad, but like really glaring stuff that should have been addressed by an editor — structure, flow, the aforementioned redundancies, and some pretty off color jokes — were left in. It felt like I when I bought the book I was also handed a red pen. As someone who’s worked in the publishing industry it feels very much like this book was written with a deadline in mind as opposed to a story.

I don’t think it was a complete failure by any means — I think it takes a lot to be that honest, regardless how your honest sits with me — I just wish the honesty was met with more sincerity and a shitload more practice. There were moments that I found really moving, but the weight of significance of those moments were deeply unbalanced. It was really sweet to read what he has to say about Patrick, but it feels weird that he (Patrick) took up more of the book than Joe’s wife. Or Andy, for that matter, who wasn’t even mentioned. 20 pages spent on story about an elementary school bully with little conclusion beyond “i was lonely” versus two paragraphs on why the band went on hiatus. Again, what editor is letting that slide?

I think Joe is probably a really good story teller but a pretty bad/novice creative non fiction writer. It’s all tell and no show. I think with more time and guidance the book would have/could have gone somewhere, but honestly I don’t really think he was actually in a place to start making conclusions about his life’s events nor do I think his editor/publisher etc. weren’t gonna give him the time to do so. And when you cut yourself off from being able to talk about or create characters of the people in your life your not so much writing a memoir as you are an explanation.

If you do feel like reading it — which is fair, it is (at times) very entertaining — I’ll let you know which chapters to skip.

Okay sorry for the novel. Peace out!

Yeah I agree. When I saw the bit about how he wasn’t gonna trash anyone in the band and they brought only positive things in his life and he wasn’t gonna spill any dirt and that the Arma hazing was a “positive experience” I just knew it was gonna be bad. 

Part of why Pete’s book is so interesting (to me haha) is that he touches on a lot of conflict with his bandmates and how it affects the band and how complex their relationships are. Joe is not in the book at all— Pete just refers vaguely to “The other guys in the band” besides Martin/Patrick and The Animal/Andy. They’re very distant with each other mostly, at one point he even says he’s too embarrassed to ask The Animal to live with him. 

But anyway yeah, I knew it was not gonna be good for the reasons you were outlining. Joe strikes me as a very laid back person that minds his own business and doesn’t want to drag his drama out in public like Pete often does, and also no one wants people taking stuff that happened 20 years ago out of context, but like I just felt like the way the band was presented came across as a little insincere and too approved by everyone’s publicist. 

I don’t doubt they are like A Band Forever or whatever but like for example the Arma hazing thing, multiple people who were there said they hazed the shit out of Joe and he went home crying and Chris had to fly out in the middle of the night or something. Like Joe is obviously over it by now but I just felt like the books presentation of it was a little insincere compared to how Chris described it 15 years ago lmfao 

Also, there was this thing that happened in 2008 JUST before the hiatus where Patrick admitted he quit the band at one point and then Joe said he didn’t even feel like he was in the band at all and he knew they were all gonna get upset with him for telling a journalist that. Then the article came out and everyone but especially Andy lost it on social media and said it was all lies except Patrick who said that yes it was factual but he didn’t agree with the phrasing/spin. And like every single #controversial bandom scandal on the planet the later articles about the incident were of course written by Pete’s cowriter for the novel Joe is mysteriously absent from. Andy is also characterized as very violent in the Blender article which he adamantly denies and The Animal is the same in the book 

ANYWAY I’m not surprised Joe didn’t talk about his wife since like he wants to protect his family which is totally understandable but I am shocked Andy didn’t get one mention 😭 Considering the hiatus was announced not long after the Blender fiasco I definitely think the devil is in the missing details and there were so many holes in what I saw of the book, lmfao

[talenlee]

Cancon 2023 Wrapup

Cancon 2023 Wrapup

As I write this, I have gotten home from Cancon 2023. The day started at around 7 AM, then started on the con floor at 8:30, and following that we had to pack down at 12:30 and finally got ourselves on the road at 1:30. It’s now many hours later than that and much of my time has been spent recovering from the drive and the weekend of standing on my two feet and shouting at people a lot. What follows is memories constructed, as best I can, from the notes I took of the time, and the information present to me now.

First things first, this is a convention that differs from most I do by being so far away from my home that I have to sleep near the event. This year, we got lodgings in someone’s spare room, with myself, Fox, and the driver who took us. That driver, who I won’t name on this blog so as to not blow up their spot, was super helpful the whole time, didn’t have to be there and was generally 100% great. I do not know how to repay them the effort they put forth to help us get the convention run.

But anyway, we drove down on Friday morning; this gave us time to get to the convention centre, register our presence, then set up our table area and the display of our goods. Our displays this year featured three 3-meter long tables arranged in a L shape, and we had some card tables as well, that put some of our stock out away from us, and meant that you didn’t have to approach us as people to look at the products we were selling. I thought this was a bad idea because I thought our most useful tool for converting attention to sales was me, talking to people, but I also didn’t think it was good to argue about it, so I just let it go.

Turns out I was completely wrong: By having the table there, we invited people to stop from the flow of traffic, then I saw them slip in closer to avoid being an impediment, then they’d come to the table and just… buy things. Just buy them! No explanation, no hard sell, no rules explainers, just… they’d buy them based on the boxes.

That’s weird enough as it is, but know what made it weirder? The things they chose to buy. There are a bunch of games I sell that are, in my opinion, aggressively weird. Some of our games have a great clear aesthetic that pulls the eye – games like You Can’t Win, Hook Line & Sinker, and The Botch and The Botch Is Back are all based around clear and bright designs that I think hold attention. But Winston’s Archive is a game I made with an incredible niche theme: Sorting books. What’s more, Winston’s Archive is a game where, thanks to trying to incorporate dysexic-free fonts, the cover kind of looks a bit… drafty? Like a first draft. Like the things that would normally make it look more interesting make it harder to read, so the result is a box cover that I feel a little awkward about.

We have one copy of Winston’s Archive left.

I have no story about it, no viral hit, no explanation from some source about a game that infected a group and then they all came back to play it more. I have no story about that. I just know that somehow, left to their own devices, a bunch of people looked at this game box and went ‘oh yeah, I’ll have that for $15’ and they just straight up bought it. That’s really exciting!

Another memorable thing is that on the first day, I wore my This Shirt Says Trans Rights shirt. I did this because I figured it’d be the busiest day and if I was going to get into a fuss over it, I’d rather get it over and done with. What I got instead was a consistent response from strangers, even people I walked past, complimenting the shirt, which was really nice. What’s more, I wound up having a lot of conversations with queer gamers and parents of queer gamers who wanted to be able to connect to people, and also get games that didn’t seem they were going to be likely to shock anyone with anything upsetting.

It reminded me of that awkward phrase I don’t like, ‘find your tribe,’ where the whole point in our disconnected landscape of socially unmoored people-bubbles, there are definitely factors that let us anchor ourselves to one another, and bereft of anything else, finding one another is helpful, it’s a way to be able to say ‘I can connect on at least this.’

We sold a bunch of Queer Coding too; a game that I think of as just an icebreaker, something you want for cons and meetups where you’ll be dealing with people you don’t know. Similarly, Senpai Notice Me flew off the shelves, but it always does: people love a meme and this one is also very pretty. Finally, You Can’t Win continued its weird presence selling itself, because despite the game being very clear about how hard it is, people kept buying it.

The other thing I usually bring back from Cancon, aside from stories of people I yelled at and a sore throat, is a haul of games I bought, and this year I didn’t buy any. It was a conscious decision: I was busy, and afraid of spending money at first, but then as things became more relaxed, and the large stall I was excited by dropped their prices more and more, I found myself nonetheless deciding to instead not buy new games this year. This wasn’t a wholly painless choice: What I wanted to ‘buy’ effectively, was more space in my house; by not buying new things until I had exhausted what I owned, I was making sure I didn’t have an ever-growing stack of games I didn’t know if I wanted any more.

There are a few things I kind of wish I had picked up, but not enough to have actually done it; Red Rising was down to $20, B’Twixt: A Game Of Thrones is a game I want to have a copy of but not a Game of Thrones copy, and that’s all we have so far. Wise Guys, a $100 big box game, was going for $10 and I passed it over, and I even saw games on my wishlist – like Not Alone and Fog Of Love at steep discount, and decided to not get them.

I am thinking about this feeling, this decision to do things this way and about how excited I was to see how many of the games I took to the Bring-And-Buy had sold. I want to make sure I’m not focusing on acquisition and instead on what board games are; Experiences.

The last story of Cancon – at least for now, as I remember it – is of my Tyranids. I have some Tyranids, a whole army’s worth, from 2004. I have played with them once, and then they sat in a drawer, in a box. I decided this year to try and rehome them, to put them in the bring-and-buy and sell them on to someone else. Since it’s a whole army, it’s expensive, and people interested in the field have told me it’s a good price for them… but also someone needs to want to buy a whole army’s worth of Tyranids, even retro metal ones.

They didn’t sell, but I’m not upset about it. I want them to go to someone who wants them, not someone who was afraid of missing out. We’ll try again at MOAB and maybe if they don’t move after enough tries, we’ll find some other place to put them. Who knows, maybe the spaces for play will have opened up enough that I get to play with them. I know One Page Rules is a cool looking system with something Tyraniddy in it. Could be useful there!

But this is the joy of material games: They are material. I can share them with people and I can give them away and nobody controls the central authority on how people play with them.

Check it out on PRESS.exe to see it with images and links!

#Diary

[samanthahirr]

I'd love to hear about 8 and 24 for the meta ask meme! <3

Thanks for these asks, Mac! Fun Meta Asks for Writers

#8 - Is what you like to write the same as what you like to read?

YES, I think what I like to write IS the same as what I like to read! I love adventure stories, I love get togethers, I love idiots mutually pining, I love humor, I love horror, I love hurt/comfort. Those types of stories are my favorites to read and reread. And those are the kinds of plots I find the most inspiring to write! 

While I do enjoy reading the occasional relationship drama or curtainfic or kidfic or character study, and even deathfic on rare days when I want to cry...those aren’t the types of stories I want to immerse myself in for days of writing at a time. So those simply aren’t the stories I end up writing.

#24 - Would you say your writing has changed over time?

God, this is such a fascinating question I’ve never considered before. I had to open up one of my first fics from 10 years ago and compare it to something I just published, and I was shocked to realize that my answer is essentially NO.

My “writing style” has baaaaaarely changed in the last 10 years. Small differences are that I (try to) use fewer adverbs nowadays, and I’ve thankfully dropped the weird misogyny that cropped up in my earlier stuff (which like…where was that even coming from?! What the hell, younger-me?!). And nowadays my ratio between dialogue and narrative asides has tipped a little more to the narrative side, but I think that’s because I’m writing from the POV of more complex and intelligent protagonists. I mean, James Bond is a super-spy; when he walks into a room, he’s going to be a lot more observant than an average citizen, and I like to demonstrate his expertise and skills by including those observations in the narrative.

I can say my “writing process” has changed, and for the better! I’ve learned to trust in my flow more than I used to. I used to struggle with getting first drafts written, agonizing over word choice and varying sentence structure, and constantly editing as I wrote. First drafts took forever to get out! Nowadays, I’ll do sprints to write a first draft of a scene or a short fic quickly, then I won’t look at it for a few days, and when I come back to it, I find that almost all of it is written well. There’s still polishing to be done, plus adding in additional details/layers I thought up during the time away. But when I don’t let myself second-guess or edit as I write, I write much faster and with less painful self-doubt than I used to!

I've really loved getting prompted to think about all of these self-reflective questions!

[industrialisland]

writing process

Tagged by @red-sky-in-mourning

do you write in order?

man I wish. I usually start in order, at least. I write until I hit a block and then skip to a part that I feel more excited about, whatever it takes to keep myself writing. I’ve gotten up in the middle of the night to jot down some random collection of sentences that I might use later. Tying those scenes together later is definitely something I struggle with. This is why I don’t post fic til I’ve got it completed.

The nice thing about co-writing Home Sweet Home with my sister is that I’m forced to write with some structure- no skipping ahead, because what she writes is based off what I write, and vice-versa, and I have to be timely about it because she’s waiting on me. Being given an open-ended prompt is really helpful. Writing on my own gives me too many options and maybe too much leeway as far as getting it done timely.

how fully formed does your writing come out the first try?

Fairly. I’m a big reader and I’ve always had a good grasp on writing, and I edit as I go. And I like to re-read my work so I catch little errors and things that don’t make sense. My beta reader complains she has nothing to do, lol. I’d like to be good at outlines but I’m just not.

how many drafts do you go through?

I don’t write in drafts. Occasionally if a scene isn’t working/is too long/is sort of what I’m looking for but not quite, I’ll rewrite it, but I don’t rewrite the entire story. For example, in my original first draft of everything broken, Stede punches Ed in the face immediately upon arriving back on the Revenge. Changing that to a kiss meant a lot of softening of their interactions. There was a much longer interlude of Stede’s thought process in getting back to Ed that just wasn’t flowing, so I had to rewrite to keep the important bits and make everything more succinct. I also did some POV switching- originally the entire fic was from Ed’s POV, but making it switch back between both of their POVs rounded it out so much better.

tell me about your process.

I clear out time to write and I use Write or Die to set myself a word goal. Some days it’s just barely scraping by, other days I don’t even notice that the timer has stopped, the key is to make it a habit. I use Spotify to find some chill/focus music, no TV, especially not the source material because that gives me the creeps, like I’m perverting it somehow, lol. I have to be really excited about an idea to write, though, I always have this weird lingering embarrassment about starting a new fic for no real reason!

It takes me a long time, though. I’m in awe of the people who can write a novel length fic in less than a month. Both of my fics took me ~3 months each.