#the game is all about action and being on borrowed time

[totentnz]

some mundane things v and johnny do:

going to the laundromat. they have to stay there because someone stole v's underwear one too many times and that shits expensive

late night trip to buy cigarettes. v was convinced she still had a pack. she bought a bunch of vapes some time ago but johnny gets grumpy when she doesnt smoke a "real" cigarette

getting lunch from one of the stalls in the megabuilding. johnny picks the food, v picks the drink.

v has an impromptu "i need to dye my hair" moment, she already owns every colour under the sun but none of them are right so they do a "quick" trip to the drugstore. johnny wants new nailpolish

v decides to pop into the record store. johnny looks around and finds some old classics. v buys all of them. + a poster bc it looks cool

v is doing some coding and the sound of the keyboard relaxes him. eventually it reminds him of alt and he goes off at her. v obliges however and switches to the digital keyboard. johnny doesnt know if he likes it

they walk past a thriftstore and johnny stops v. they are selling a copy of v's favourite movie. she lost the vhs some time ago and never bothered to get a new one

even tho v lived in her apartment for a few months now she still has some boxes to unpack. johnny gets a glimpse into her past that doesnt feel like an invasion of privacy. v wishes she could do the same for him

back at the record store johnny talks about guitars. v doesnt understand a word and it reminds her of her ex. maybe she does have a type

[gunnerfc]

Distracted | Steph Catley x Arsenal!Reader (18+)

Summary: On the rare off day, you attempt to spend it playing video games with some of your teammates but Steph has other plans.

Warnings: fingering (steph receiving) | not sure exactly how to tag that there’s a gaming headset being used so other people could technically overhear 

WC: 2.4k

AN: steph is so 😩🧎🏻😩🧎🏻

You groaned as your eyes fluttered open, the tiring training from the past week plus the game you played yesterday caught up to you. You were thankful today was an off day, any chance to relax around the house was never something you would turn down. Before the game yesterday, you made a deal with Caitlin, Leah, and Katie that the four of you could play a few rounds of FIFA while you were all relaxing.

You sat up in bed, stretching your arms slightly before turning to Steph’s side of the bed. Your brows furrowed in confusion when you were met with an empty bed, your girlfriend hadn’t said anything about going anywhere. You turned to pick up your phone, seeing a text from the defender that she had gone out for coffee with Lia and didn’t want to wake you.

You quickly texted her back before opening the group chat that was made with the three teammates you'd be playing with. You rolled your eyes at the multiple messages of them yelling at you to wake up but responded that you were awake. You immediately got a reply from Katie that read ‘fucking finally’ to which you sent her the middle finger emoji. 

You got out of bed, taking your time doing everything you needed to do in the bathroom just to piss your teammates off further. It was your day off, you were meant to be relaxing and that’s what you were going to do. Just as you made your way to the living room, the front door was opened, and in ran Calvin. The dog jumped up at you in excitement and you couldn’t help but giggle at his actions. You quickly gave him a few pats on the head before he was off to find his water bowl. 

You stood up fully just as Steph came around the corner, a bright smile on her face when she locked eyes with you. “Good morning, baby,” the defender whispered when she was closer to you before you pulled her into a kiss.

Your lips moved against her softly, each time you kissed Steph you put as much love as you could into it. The Aussie pulled back after a moment when air became an issue, her arms locked around your neck as yours rested on her waist. 

“You don’t mind if I borrow the TV for a bit, do you? Me and Caitlin have to beat Leah and Katie’s ass on FIFA,”  you asked, a small smile on your face as you stared at your girlfriend.

“Of course not, though if you're teaming up with Cait, you might be on the losing team,” Steph joked as her hands played with the baby hairs on the back of your neck. 

You groaned at her words, of course, Leah and Katie would stick you with the one person who wasn’t great at the game. You sighed dramatically as you pulled away from Steph to hook up your playstation to the TV. Steph giggled at your dramatics before telling you she was going to take a shower. 

You gave her a thumbs up behind your back as you focused on the cords in front of you. Once you had everything set up and ready to go, you quickly sent a text to your teammates that you were ready. You had your gaming headset resting on your head and once Katie had joined, your ears were met with a round of swearing that you had taken too long.

“Um! It’s our day off, Katie! Excuse me for not wanting to be in a rush all day,” you huffed into the mic, the defender ignoring your words completely. 

You tuned her out as you waited for Leah and Caitlin to join as well. You heard Leah’s voice telling Katie to ‘shut up’ and you were thankful for the blonde. Caitlin joined the call last, quickly saying hello to everyone. 

“Wait, wait. Before we start, Caitlin, how good are you at this game,” you questioned, hoping Steph was just messing with you.

You knew she was right when all you could hear was loud laughter from Leah and Katie before Caitlin said ‘not the best.’ You threw your head back against the couch at her response. You let them pick the teams as you hoped that you’d be able to carry your team to a respectful loss.

Meanwhile, upstairs, Steph had just gotten in the shower. The defender let the hot water wash over her as she washed her hair. Her thoughts started innocently until she thought about how long it had been since the two of you had sex. With your busy schedules, it had been a while, and now with a rare day off, you were downstairs playing a video game. 

Steph could feel herself becoming needier, the pressure between her legs already noticeable. She needed something to distract you from the game you were playing but she knew how you could get when it came to winning things. The defender quickly finished her shower, her neediness growing by the second. Once she was out, she found the perfect set of clothes that would drive you crazy.

As she got dressed, she could hear you yelling in the living room, swearing when Caitlin wouldn’t pass the ball to you when you were open. Steph took a moment to breathe at the sound of your normally sweet tone turned harsh, it was affecting more than she thought it would. She quietly made her way to the living room, though you were too engrossed with your game to realize she was out of the shower. 

You were laid out on the ‘L’ shaped couch, your legs resting on the extended piece of the couch as your eyes were locked on the TV. You didn’t notice Steph right away, not until she was right next to you, seemingly forgetting what personal space was. You spared her a quick glance, throwing her a smile before your eyes were back on the TV in front of you. Steph sat with her thighs pressed tightly, trying to apply pressure to her clothed core.

Steph watched you play as best as she could, her mind hadn't stopped racing with different images of you making her cum and it was becoming hard to focus on anything else. You had yet to realize what she was wearing, too determined to win a video game to focus on your girlfriend. Simply being this close to you wasn’t enough and Steph was going to have to step her game up.

“Baby,” the defender whispered lightly, knowing that if she was much louder, your teammates would be able to hear you over your gaming headset. “Can you take a break,” she added as her hand traced random shapes on your thigh. 

You swallowed lightly as you felt her fingertips on your skin, blinking a few times to keep your focus on the game. “Maybe in a bit, babe,” you nodded but never took your eyes off the game you were playing.

Steph groaned softly, she couldn’t wait for ‘a bit’ because she knew you meant longer than you said. The defender turned her attention back to the animated soccer game on the TV, sighing softly when the game was paused. You scoffed as you heard Leah saying she needed to get her takeout but you took the opportunity to look at Steph.

Your breathing picked up slightly at the sight of your girlfriend wearing your arsenal training shorts and your jersey. She knew that you loved seeing her in things that marked her as yours, especially seeing her with your last name across her back. Your eyes scanned up and down her body, before you locked eyes with her, she was trying her hardest to get you away from your games but your need to beat Leah and Katie was winning.

“We’ll play a couple more games and then I’m all yours. I promise,” you husked, your arousal seeping through your words. You leaned to give Steph a quick kiss when you heard Leah over your headset saying she was back.

Steph tried to deepen the kiss before you pulled away but she was unsuccessful. Her head fell back against the couch when you pulled away, far too needy to wait for you. An idea popped into her head as she stared up at the ceiling and she smirked to herself knowing you would give in to her. When she knew you were solely focused on the game, she slid away from your side slightly to give herself a little bit more room.

You were too focused on your game to notice Steph wasn’t pressed against your side anymore and you certainly didn’t notice when she moved to take the shirt she was wearing off. It wasn’t until the piece of clothing was draped across your thigh and you took a quick look down that your eyes went wide in realization. You blinked rapidly to refocus your thoughts but your need to know won out and you took a quick look in Steph’s direction when you lost possession of the ball.

You bit back a groan when your eyes locked with your girlfriend’s bare torso, realizing she opted to not wear a bra after she got out of the shower. You closed your eyes and shook your head to clear your mind, your attention back on the game after you heard Caitlin yelling at you. It was becoming harder to focus on the game knowing your girlfriend was half-naked just a few inches away. 

You were determined to win this game, the score was only three to two with a few minutes left to play. You hoped that your heavy breathing couldn’t be picked up on your headset, otherwise your teammates would never let you live it down. As you played the game, you felt another piece of clothing hit your legs and you didn’t have to look to know it was the shorts your girlfriend was just wearing.

Steph sat with one leg propped on the coffee table in front of the couch and the other spread wide as the cool air hit her wet center. Steph moaned lightly at the cool feeling, her hands running up and down her body, groping her chest as her head rested against the couch. She knew she was getting to you, but you weren’t caving as fast as she needed you to.

“Give me a second, guys,” you mumbled as you paused the game, ignoring the annoyed shouts from your teammates.

“C’mere, baby,” you growled softly, keeping your voice low so you weren’t overheard on the mic.

Steph jerked her head up as you pointed to the area between your now spread legs. The defender quickly listened, hoping you finally give her what she needed. Steph settled between your legs as you wrapped your arms around her, the controller in your hands was resting on her lower abdomen. You hit resume on your screen as you leaned your head forward slightly to press kisses along Steph’s bare shoulder blade, your eyes still locked with the screen in front of you.

Steph, completely unaware of how gaming controllers reacted to certain plays, jolted slightly when the controller vibrated against her lower stomach, sending shockwaves through her wet cunt. Steph’s head fell back against your shoulder at the sensation, soundless moans falling from her lips. Each time you went in for a tackle or were tackled, the controller would vibrate against her, acting as a stimulation for her quickly approaching orgasm. 

She was no longer paying attention to the TV screen, more focused on what she was feeling between her thighs. She missed when the game ended, but knew something was different when you let go of the controller. You let the item fall against her thigh, your fingers tracing lines up and down any part of her body they could touch. You didn’t bother taking the headset off just yet as you were still in conversation with the other three but that didn’t stop you from dipping your fingers into Steph’s aching core.

One of Steph’s hands shot up to her mouth to cover her lips, silencing the loud moans that were escaping her. You brought the hand that was currently inside her to her wrist, forcing her hand away from her mouth. You kept your conversation going as you thrust three of your fingers in her dripping cunt, the thought of one of them hearing her becoming more of a turn-on as you continued. 

Steph clenched around your fingers but it didn’t stop you from roughly pushing into her, the palm of your hand rubbing against her sensitive clit with each thrust. Steph was close to the edge, the familiar feeling quickly approaching as you didn’t let up. The defender whispered your name followed by a chant of “please” as you sped up your fingers. Her hushed moans and the sound of your hand hitting her skin echoed around the room as you listened to your teammates argue over your headset. 

“I’m gonna cum,” the defender rushed out as her back arched off your front, her hips rolling to meet your fingers.

Steph’s breath stuttered as she came around your fingers, her thighs attempting to close but you kept her legs spread with your other hand. You didn’t slow your movements as you fucked her through her orgasm, her cum coating your hand as you moved inside her. Steph whined lightly when the feeling became too much and you pulled your fingers from her sensitive cunt.

Steph rested against your chest as her breathing was heavy, her eyes fluttering shut as she calmed down. You brought your three fingers to your mouth, sucking them clean as you held back a moan as you tasted your girlfriend.

You tuned back into the conversation over your headset just as Leah asked if you guys wanted to play a few more games. “No, I think Steph and I have some plans,” you responded, earning ‘boos’ from Caitlin and Leah. Katie opted to make a whipping sound before you rolled your eyes and told them goodbye. 

You quickly threw the headset off your head, tossing it somewhere with your gaming controller. Steph was still catching her breath as you ran your hands up and down her body. “You have my full attention now, baby,” you whispered against her skin as you sucked and nipped at her skin. 

The two of you made good use of the day off you had, making up for lost time in the bedroom. You didn’t let up once as you pleasured your girlfriend, pulling orgasm after orgasm from her the entire evening.

[heartss4val]

hi valerie!

i have a suggestion for a leo x reader. we all know he would give beautiful little gifts, so how do you think he would react when receiving them? like something artistic and carefully handmade. idk just thought it might me cute lmao

thank you 🩶

𐑺 ˖ ࣪ ࿐ྂ KNICKNACKS | leo valdez x gn!reader hc's [wc: 586]

leo would be so ecstatic omg

he'd handle the small trinket you made for him with so much care and delicacy, you'd think it was made out of glass. and once he was finished admiring your creation, (though, that would take a while.) he'd immediately blurt out a high-pitched "for me??"

he just struggles to comprehend why someone as talented as you would use your creative abilities for him? he's so used to being overlooked that even the thought of being the recipient of your artistry is almost unfathomable. :(

leo would turn your creations over and over in his hands, silently memorizing every detail, as if he's afraid that your work might vanish if he takes his eyes off of it.

and his reaction?? always stays the same?? no matter how long its been?? you'd present your work to him and he'd be so theatrically shocked. like full on gasping and lowkey fighting for his life as if he hadn't expected the gift at all, even though you'd been showering him with your creations for the past month.

but once he gets past that point?? he becomes almost obnoxious about it. 💀 he'd sit in the dining pavilion so proudly, your little knickknack perched right next to him with the full intent of somebody asking him about it JUST so that he could ramble about you.

literally ONE person would bring it up, just to make small conversation, and he'd be like, "oh, THIS?? it was made by MY partner, for ME, by the way. but no big deal, y'know."

waited his entire life for that moment fr.

i completely mean it when i say leo would sweep ALL the belongings from his shelf to showcase even ONE item you made for him in all its glory. front and center. his siblings are so confused.

but if you start regularly gifting him things and blessing him with your artistry on a daily basis? he'll dedicate an entire shelf to your creations. and it's so funny because the rest of his area is so cluttered and disorganized, with random unfinished projects laying around without a second thought, bed not even made, but the shelf above his bunk?? the one with all your creations sitting on it?? it's so neat?? organized and color coded and everything?? it almost looks out of place.

even when you're away on quests, he still admires the creations you've left behind, tenderly cradling them in his hands and running his fingers over every curve and edge, as though you were still with him in the moment. :((

after some time, the gifting thing would turn into running joke between you two. a game of one-upmanship where every gift had to be better than the last. like if you made him a small sculpture out of clay, he would show up at your cabin the next day with a BOUNTY full of creations he made himself, along with a bouquet of flowers that he borrowed with no intention of giving back (stole) from the demeter kids to top it all off. <3

you'd make him one thing and he makes you ten more, he's so whipped.

leo would cherish your gifts so much, like he's almost scared of ruining them. especially if your gift is something that is SUPPOSED to be worn, like a ring of some sort. he'd proudly wear it around camp, obviously, but he'd check on it every few minutes to make sure it hadn't magically vanished from his finger. or worse, broke.

of course, leo knows he could fix it if it became damaged, but it wouldn't be the same. it wouldn't have your charm and artistry, your unique touch that made it so special.

all in all, leo is so enamored with your creativity, but judging by his actions, you probably already knew that.

[wispystar]

☁︎·̩͙✧

spencer reid . ii

✦ = finished | ✧ = not finished

Feel free to recommend me some more fics! If there is any author that doesn’t want their work on here pls let me know and I’ll remove it. Series are at the bottom. Be warned for spoilers. I will not be adding spoiler warnings so tread lightly. please lmk if links arent working

back to <;- spencer reid . i

—-

Amidst the Chaos by @a-simple-gaywitch

genre: angst, fluff, fem reader, bau reader | summary: Spencer and (Y/N) didn't get along, and it annoyed the whole BAU. But when a traumatized (Y/N) shows up at Spencer's apartment late one night, their whole relationship shifts | tw/warnings: mentions of abduction.

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Adored By Him . ii by @beautiful-bau-beau

genre: angst, gn reader, bau reader | summary: Spencer dating someone and you being sad because you had a crush on him but not saying anything because you don’t want to ruin his happiness.

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All I know by @unseededtoast

genre: angst, fluff, fem reader | summary: Five years after leaving Spencer Reid, it seems that fate might have given you a second chance. Inspired by "Everything Has Changed" by Taylor Swift/Ed Sheeran

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Already Gone . ii by @fandom-imagines-stories

genre: angst, fem reader, bau reader | summary: With a relationship interfering with your dangerous job, you force yourself to break things off with your boyfriend. Reid tries to maintain a professional relationship, but can’t deny his heart break. Inspired by Already Gone, a cover by Sleeping at Last. 

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Addicted to a losing game. . ii by @sinfulspencer

genre: angst, fem reader, bau reader | summary: Rossi is getting married, the whole team is present. Y/N doesn’t have a date but Spencer does. And it’s not her.  

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a father's daughter by @/pathologicalreid

genre: fluff, angst, fem reader, bau reader, hotch reader, established relationship | summary: in which your father doesn't approve of your relationship, but who knows how he'll react when reid jumps into action after a threat against your life

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brilliance by @pathologicalreid

genre: angst, fluff, fem reader, bau reader, established relationship | summary: in which reader goes into labor after a fight and spencer is nowhere to be found

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Books and Notes by @galaxy-siren

genre: fluff, fem reader | summary: During movie night with Derek and Garcia, Spencer’s neighbor returns a book she borrowed and leaves a note inside it asking Spencer to dinner.

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coffee by @ddejavvu

genre: fluff, gn reader, bau reader | summary: it's his first day at the BAU and the reader is so taken by him, she has constant puppy eyes and he mentions about needing a coffee and the reader simply gives him her coffee cup and then morgan and emily are like 'you're whipped'

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cake by @reidjumpers

genre: fluff, gn reader, pregnant reader, bau reader, established relationship | summary: accidentally announcing your pregnancy to the team all because of a slice of cake

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Can’t Be Your Secret Anymore by @shemarmooresfedora

genre: angst, fluff, fem reader, nurse reader, established relationship | summary: You hardly expected the next time you saw Spencer after your big fight is him coming out of an ambulance on a stretcher.

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cookies & casserole by @/ddejavvu

genre: fluff, gn reader, established relationship | summary: The team visiting Spencer for one reason or another on their day off & reader opens the door (maybe even wearing one of Spence's shirts) and that's how they all find out Spencer is in a relationship?

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day-off by @railingsofsorrow

genre: fluff, fem reader, dad spence | summary: dad!spencer spends his day off with his daughter.

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deprivation by @reiding-writing

genre: angst, gn reader, bau reader | summary: Spencer needs support. He needs it. But he for the life of him just cannot reach out for it himself. And after one particular case, you make an effort to try and quell is emotional rampage.

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distance by @/reiding-writing

genre: angst, fluff, gn reader, bau reader, post prison spence established relationship | summary: Spencer makes a show of physically distancing himself from his teammates after he returns from prison, and in trying to abide by that boundary you accidentally misread his intentions

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Daisies Mean 'I'm an Idiot' by @/shemarmooresfedora

genre: fluff, slight angst, fem reader, bau reader | summary: Spencer unintentionally declines when Y/N asks him out because he couldn’t possibly be the man she was describing to Penelope in her office.

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do you like how i look? or just how i look on you? by @bau-drabbles

genre: angst, gn reader, bau reader, established relationship | summary: I was wondering if you do like a concept where reader and Spencer have relationship problems because he's in love with JJ?

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falling asleep by @in-another-april

genre: fluff, gn reader, established relationship | summary: It’s rare for Spencer to fall asleep before you, but it’s a very welcome sight

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For Your Eyes Only by @ro-is-struggling

genre: fluff, angst, fem reader, garcia! reader | summary: The three times you and Spencer managed to keep your relationship a secret and the one time you got caught.

-

Here for you by @weird-is-life

genre: fluff, slight angst, fem reader, bau reader | summary: 4 times you take care of Spencer and one time he takes care of you | tw: blood, injury, abductions, mentions of car accident

-

home grown by @nostalgicmess

genre: fluff, fem reader, gardener reader, established relationship | summary: JJ’s trip to the farmer’s market results in a discovery about Spencer.

-

hibernation envy by @honeydjarin

genre: fluff, slight angst, gn reader, bau reader | summary: It’s okay to seek out warm hands and a tender heart, especially when it’s this cold. 

-

How Penelope Garcia Saved Christmas by @reidscanehand

genre: fluff, slight angst, fem reader, bau reader, christmas fic | summary: 12 days of christmas cookies with the team and how Penelope fixes reid and readers relationship

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I'm not her by @hercleverboy

genre: angst, fluff, fem reader, established relationship | summary: the reader is tired of being compared to maeve.

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I'm fine (not really) by @/luveline

genre: fluff, fem reader, bau reader, shy reader | summary: reader cannot function when spencer is around

-

I Don't Mind If It's You by @/eideticallys

genre: fluff, gn reader, bau reader | summary: maybe styling spencer’s hair should be an everyday thing for both of you.

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I Would Never Fall . ii by @/reidscanehand

genre: fluff, slight angst, fem reader, bau reader | summary: an undercover mission reveals a lot more than expected

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I love you (and I don't want to) by @/babymetaldoll

genre: angst, fluff, fem reader, bau reader | summary: After three years in love with Spencer, (Y/N) decides it's time to move on.  He will never love her anyway, right?  

-

my wonder by @downthe-f4ndom-rabbith0le

genre: fluff, fem reader, bau reader | summary: All his life, Dr. Spencer Reid has been told he is a genius - gifted, different. When you, a new member of the BAU, arrive, he expects the same weirded-out reaction from you as everyone does. But when you don't, and you instead find him interesting, Spencer finds himself forming an attachment to you. And as the years go on, is it really any wonder that he falls for you? This is six times you secretly say I love you to Spencer, and one time he says it back in the same fashion.

-

Meeting the Team by @/galaxy-siren

genre: fluff, fem reader, established relationship | summary: Spencer has been keeping his girlfriend a secret from the team. What happens when they finally meet her. 

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migraine massage by @/reiding-writing

genre: fluff, slight angst, gn reader, bau reader | summary: Migraines are the worst. They hurt and they stop you from doing absolutely everything. Spencer was silently pleading for relief from his own body, and you plan to fulfil those needs.

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nicknames by @pathologicalreid

genre: fluff, fem reader, bau reader | summary: in which you meet the team for the first time, and receive your first nickname

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no expectations by @andiebeaword

genre: angst, fluff, fem reader, bau reader | summary: Reader is in love with Reid. He’s fallen for a woman named Maeve. While trying to save her, Reader makes a choice. | notes: full fic is on ao3

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notice me . ii by @fandom-imagines-stories

genre: angst, fem reader, established relationship | summary: A killer leaves Reid’s girlfriend on the steps of the BAU with a message for Hotchner and the team. Spencer’s judgement is clouded and it seems that the killer isn’t finished with you. 

-

no sign of danger by @/pathologicalreid

genre: fluff, slight angst, fem reader, bau reader, established relationship | summary: Spence becomes protective of you after swat makes a mistake causing injury.

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passive aggressive by @/ddejavvu

genre: angst, fluff, gn reader, established relationship | summary: spencer’s stressed, and he takes it out on you. you’re sure it would have hurt far worse if he’d shouted, but instead he broke you down bit by bit, his cold demeanor leaving you crying in your car.

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"Ready?" by @reidyoulikeabook

genre: fluff, fem reader, bau reader | summary: The team finds out about yours and Spencer’s relationship.

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rejection by @/kryptonitejelly

genre: angst, slight fluff, gn reader, bau reader | summary: say reader has been pining and yearning over aaron for so long and decided to tell him about reader's true feelings but reader didn't know that aaron is currently seeing someone :") he's all sorry and apologetic towards the reader :( after the 'rejection', reader ask for transfer request to another department bc as much as the reader try to not get affected, it still.....

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Rather Ardently by @/reidscanehand

genre: angst, fluff, fem reader, bau reader, established relationship | summary: reader where she and Spencer are married and then he starts having his headaches so he seeks out help from Maeve. She doesn’t die or anything but they become friends and reader starts to feel insecure about herself because of how much Maeve and Spencer has in common and then Spencer realises but her reassures that he loves her?

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Reaching for the Moon . ii by @/reidscanehand

genre: fluff, angst, fem reader, interpol reader, college friends | summary: based loosely on Sabrina or an old friend of reids comes back into his life and he's hoping this time he can be the one who gets called hers.

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spending the night by @mandarinmoons

genre: fluff, gn reader, established relationship | summary: just a cute fic about waking up to spencer after spending the night

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secretly mine by @actually-safer-to-kiss

genre: fluff, fem reader, bau reader | summary: Spencer and Reader have been seeing each other for a while without the team's knowledge

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sense memory by @/pathologicalreid

genre: angst, fluff, fem reader, hotchner reader, established relationship | summary: After eight months, you and Spencer reunite after he was in prison and you were in WITSEC.

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Serenade her, bro! by @babymetaldoll

genre: crack fic, fluff, fem reader, bau reader, established relationship | summary: Spencer and (Y/N) have their first fight after a rough case. To help him ease his mind, Derek and Rossi take Reid out for a few drinks. But things get a little… out of hand. 

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Secret Life, Secret Wife by @reidslibrarybook

genre: fluff, fem reader | summary: Throughout his years at the BAU, the team starts to notice Spencer’s unusual behavior. It’s almost as if he’s hiding something… or someone.

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stuck between a rock and a hard place . ii by @/pathologicalreid

genre: angst, fem reader, fbi reader, established relationship | summary: You, an undercover agent, uncover a hidden secret of the country's largest operation, putting your life in danger and under the protection of the BAU.

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taken care of by @golden1u5t

genre: fluff, gn reader, established relationship | summary: could we get spencer and a fem reader where she has to take care of him after he got shot in the leg and she basically has to help him adjust to using crutches and helping him to bathe and wash his hair and stuff, especially when it’s getting longer he finds it so much more difficult

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The Very Essence of Love by @/reidscanehand

genre: angst, fluff, fem reader, bau reader | summary: Maybe he dislikes her because he can’t truly dislike her, ever. 

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Thank you for loving me by @ralvezfanatic

genre: fluff, gn reader, established relationship | summary: Spencer comes home after a long and stressful case, and doesn't want anything but to be with Reader. Of course, Reader is more than happy to take care of their boyfriend.

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The Secret Socks by @kcthrine

genre: fluff, fem reader, husband spence, bau reader | summary: Reader wakes up in the middle of the night to her husband, Spencer Reid, putting socks on her cold feet.

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The Moment I Knew . ii by @reidspharb

genre: angst, fluff, fem reader, established relationship | summary: Spencer misses your 25th birthday and that’s when you realize your relationship can’t be fixed.

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Thirty-Six Months . ii by @moonice20408

genre: angst, fluff, fem reader, bau reader | summary: You and Spencer click right away when you join the BAU and a relationship soon follows. But nothing lasts forever…

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Twenty Thousand Words Per Minute . ii by @/reidscanehand

genre: fluff, slight angst, fem reader, nanny reader | summary: I was thinking, what if reid had a son who was dyslexic? Reid has an incredibly fast reading speed and has an eidetic memory, i just think he would try his hardest to understand his son.

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the funny little things. by @messyyythoughts

genre: fluff, fem reader, bau reader | summary: your relationship with Dr Reid of the BAU is a good one, so good that there’s these little funny things that you both do with one another...

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the comfort of rain by @/hercleverboy

genre: angst, fem reader, bau reader | summary: spencer reid is her soulmate, isn’t he?

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The One Where Everyone Finds Out by @/reidscanehand

genre: fluff, fem reader, bau reader | summary: Spencer Reid is in love with Y/N, and she’s in love with him…only they don’t know it yet…and they might be are definitely going to be the very last to know. And since Spencer and Y/N happen to be surrounded by the best profilers in the country, the rest of the team is, of course, the first to piece together the romance. Little by little, bit by bit, the team solves the case of Spencer and Y/N. 

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unrequited by @hercleverboy

genre: angst, fem reader, bau reader | summary: the reader is in love with spencer. he’s not in love her.

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undercover by @spencerreidsmiles

genre: angst, fem reader | summary: spencer reid is your assignment.

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undercover by @in-my-shifting-era

genre: fluff, fem reader, bau reader | summary: When an unsub is hunting for young couples at a bar; reader and Spencer are asked to go under cover posing as a couple to catch him.

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ungentlemanly by @/reidscanehand

genre: fluff, fem reader, bau reader | summary: who knew when reid gets drunk he gets flirty

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unexpected sleepover by @luveline

genre: fluff, fem reader, bau reader, single dad spence | summary: spencer and his daughter amanda find their reunion unexpectedly interrupted when you need a place to stay the night.

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Unexpected Visitor by @sweatervest-obsessed

genre: fluff, gn reader, established relationship | summary: There are some things that the team does not know about, like you, for example.

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WooPea! by @eideticallys

genre: fluff, gn reader bau reader | summary: you start your day right, cracking science jokes & making spencer reid smile. the other bau team members be damned! or, you crack the worst jokes in the planet & emily has had enough of it.

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We're Okay by @forhappysake

genre: angst, fluff, fem reader, bau reader, established relationship | summary: After JJ admits her decade-long love for Spencer, you and your boyfriend have to have a conversation to calm both of your doubts and fears.

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Who's your daddy? by @justawritterwithideas

genre: fluff, fem oc, dad spencer | summary: After a long day's work, the BAU returns to the head office where they find a stroller with a small baby sleeping and a child very determined to surprise his father… But who's his father?

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Who Needs Time Management When I Have You? by @/eideticallys

genre: fluff fem reader, bar reader, established relationship | summary: one of the many perks of having a boyfriend with flawless memory is that you do not have to remember stuff—he remembers them for you.

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You're on your own by @rynwritesreid

genre: angst, slight fluff, fem reader, bau reader| summary: After releasing Spencer will never love you back, you take some time of work to work on your mental health. However, an unsub the team have been working to find, finds you first.

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✦ Don't Let Me Go . ii . iii by @spencexreidimagine

genre: angst, fluff, fem reader, bau reader, established relationship | summary: Can you write an imagine where Spencer and the reader get in a fight before a case and the whole time Spencer is being passive aggressive with her until she ends up seriously hurt and he thinks she’s going to die before they got to make up?

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✧ im always just a door away . ii . iii by @juqtier

genre: enemies to lovers, fluff, angst, fem reader | summary: when you moved in to your new apartment, you never imagined your neighbor, spencer reid, would be such a nightmare. he wasn’t your favorite guy. in fact, you hated him. unfortunately for you, you can never seem to escape him. the universe clearly has other plans for you two.

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✦ I'm Starvin', Darlin' . ii . iii by @bitesizedgremlin

genre: fluff, angst, fem reader, bau reader | summary: Spencer realizes how touch starved he is when you, the newest member of the BAU, develop a habit of casually touching him throughout the day. | notes/warnings: the last part has smut

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✦ "This is killing me" by @bisexualwannabewriter

genre: fluff, angst, fem reader, bau reader | summary: You’re working for the BAU, and Dr Spencer Reid is your best friend on the team. Actually, he’s your best friend, pErIoD. The thing is, you’re not supposed to feel that way about your best friend. He makes you feel some type of way, everyone in the team can see it, except you and him.

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✧ The In-Betweens by @fandom-imagines-stories

genre: fluff, angst, fem reader, hotch reader | summary: When the team figures out Reid has a secret girlfriend, they try to get all of the details. Things take an interesting turn as Spencer and the reader draw closer. (Each chapter has its own summary)

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✦ The Statistical Probability by @/reidscanehand

genre: fluff, slight angst, fem reader, bau reader | summary: Spencer Reid is doubtful of the statistical probability of falling in love until he meets the BAU’s new communications liaison, Y/N. Thus begins a relationship and a story of healing, growing, and finally finding the statistical probability of finding a happy ending. | notes: the third chapter includes smut

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more this way —-> spencer reid . iii

[shu-glue]

devilspawn!

alhaitham x gn!reader

wherein Alhaitham, despite being deeply and irrevocably in love with you, thinks it's rather immature to be picking fights with a child whose age hasn't even reached double digits yet. until he meets said child himself. notes: gn!reader, written in lowercase, reader is implied to be the traveler but can be read otherwise, alhaitham is whipped for reader, reader hates timmie so if you adore the kid i'm very sorry, two curse words (reader says ass and alhaitham mentally says little shit)

alhaitham loves you a lot. he really does. he rarely ever says the three magic words, and for the most part, it's fine on your end because he expresses his deep affection for you through his actions.

sometimes, he'll say 'i love you' through quiet but powerful hugs after he comes home from a long, grueling day in the Akademiya. other times, he'll whisper 'i love you' as he hands you a small trinket or even a book you've mentioned in passing, one he bought just earlier when he saw said item in a stall while on an assignment. he'll call you 'beloved' through massaging your shoulders after training, and he'll tell you how much he adores you through the many times you spent basking in each other's presence in comfortable silence.

he'll walk with you to the ends of the Teyvat if it means staying by your side, however…

"love," alhaitham shakes his head, "you're a… fully grown adult. the one you want to 'crush under the heavy hand that is loss', is a child. my love, a child."

now, alhaitham is no stranger to the game that is TCG, Genius Invocation, the Card Game. the only times he, kaveh, tighnari, and cyno will meet up are when they're all free, fancying a drink, and cyno wants to try out another new card he has recently obtained.

in all honesty, your partner couldn't for the life of him understand the hype about this card game. he was by no means an amateur - he has won enough games to be considered an official TCG player, despite only borrowing decks from kaveh, and he is the only one able to actually last more than 5 rounds against cyno in a single session at lambad's.

he knows how to play, he just does not see the need to play so obsessively, nor blow off money for special cards he'll only use in a few given instances of his life (if he even utters this line of thought out loud around cyno, he'll have a spear stuck on his back for the rest of the day).

however, you - his lover, his partner, the only person reserved for the ring in his pocket - love TCG, and as the loving boyfriend he is, he tries to keep his opinion of the game to himself; he'd rather have a giant spear in his back than see you sad and pouting as you shuffle through your beloved deck of cards. he should know, he's made the mistake once and it took him a couple of padisarah pudding servings to cheer you up.

alhaitham loves you, and if you like this card game, he will certainly make sure you're happy every duel or match you do. he just can't wrap his head around why you're setting off to the bridge that leads to the entrance of mondstadt city, deadset on making a something years old child cry from defeat.

"alhaitham, baby, you don't understand," you argued, "that child is my mortal enemy, my lifetime arch-nemesis, and a pain in my ass."

"yes, darling, but consider: you have many more potential TCG friends who would make better rivals than some random kid." alhaitham rubs his forehead, completely exasperated if it weren't for the adorable way you're marching ahead in front of him like a goofy soldier going into war.

you only spin around just at the mouth of the bridge, your hands on your hips as you stare up at alhaitham with a pout on your face and a raised eyebrow. "you think i'm being irrational, aren't you?"

alhaitham raises an eyebrow back as he continues walking. "not necessarily, my love, however - "

there's something about being hit in the face with multiple fluttering wings and feathers unexpectedly, that can render even the most stoic of men like alhaitham utterly lost and speechless. is it the pure shock? the pain of not really fluffy appendages hitting their face? well, it's when the haze of birds - pigeons? - finally clear, alhaitham is greeted by the displeased and outright sour expression of the one he can only assume to be timmie, your 'sworn enemy'.

"what are you doing?!" said boy screeched. "you scared my pigeons away!"

alhaitham could only blink owlishly at the dirty blond haired boy, looking around to see a bunch of pigeons flying away, leaving a trail of feathers in their wake. granted, despite all the horror stories you told him about timmie, alhaitham's rational enough to be patient with timmie.

"i'm sorry, but I don't think I have control over that, kid." alhaitham tilts his head down to look at timmie. "if you feed your pigeons in the middle of the road, especially a bridge with exactly two exit and entry points, your pigeons will surely—"

"no, my mama always said that if you're a person with a pure heart, the animals won't be afraid of you." timmie turned his nose up and stuck his tongue out at alhaitham. "that's why my pigeons like me, and not you, you meanie!"

alhaitham had to reel himself back to take in the ridiculous logic, the gears in his head turning to come up with an explanation. "no," he shakes his head as if it's hurting, "birds and all animals for that matter don't know the concept of morality, thus they have no sense of right and wrong as humans do. the only reason the pigeons run away from others and stay with you is because you're feeding them, creating a dependent relationshi—"

"blah blah, why should i listen to an old man with graying hair?"

said (old) man with gray(ing) hair visibly reels back, flabbergasted. he's not so much offended as he is shocked at timmie's attitude. he wanted to say 'no, he's not old', 'his gray hair is a natural phenomenon because of genetics', and, 'listen here you little shit'.

"see?" you commented from the sideline, arms crossed. "devilspawn."

"ARGH!" timmie shouts, pointing an accusing finger at you. "you again?! stop scaring my pigeons away!"

"i keep telling you, there's nothing i can do about that!" you shout back, bickering with the small child as if you were about to lunge at him.

alhaitham looks back and forth between the two of you, mentally wondering if he was dating and courting someone of the immature type (doesn't mind it solely, because it's you). when he moves to calm you down so the both of you can finally head into mondstadt city to look for marjorie, timmie says:

"maybe my pigeons don't like you because you look like an ugly cow!"

oh boy. no good. no, no good, alhaitham won't tolerate that.

alhaitham loves you a lot. he really does. he rarely ever says the three magic words, and for the most part, it's fine on your end because he expresses his deep affection for you through his actions.

and if it means making a little boy cry at a simple card game to protect your dignity, then so be it.

"beloved. if you would so kindly let me borrow your cards."

"wha—?"

"beloved."

this is just a silly drabble i thought of a lot of days ago and no, it's not proofread AHAHA. i have been so inactive lately and i apologize for that, school has been hectic and i was busy with college applications to boot. but now, i'm about to graduate so i should have some free time before i finally taste the college life ಥ⁠‿⁠ಥ if y'all saw this post but with no tags you did not

[deltaharrington]

SHARING IS CARING

PAIRING: Boyfriend!Bokuto Koutaro x Fem!Reader x Hinata Shoyo

SUMMARY: Bokuto’s close friend, and teammate, Hinata is inexperienced when it comes to women, so Bokuto decides to share his girlfriend as practice…

WARNINGS: NSFW content, MINORS DNI, sexual content, kinda poly?, group mastrubation, etc. Timeskip Bokuto and Hinata (THEY ARE CONSENTING ADULTS)

Dating a professional volleyball player came with its ups and downs.

Bokuto was the perfect boyfriend by all means, but that didn’t distract from the fact that he had to travel a lot, and with your work schedule, you couldn’t always make it to games.

As much as he loved seeing you at his games, Ko understood that you wanted to work. (Even though he’d argued plenty that his own income was enough for you both).

At times when you were separated, he’d have more time with the MSBY team.

Especially Hinata.

It was no surprise that his star pupil had grown since high school. He was taller, more experienced, and a complete catch.

So when the ginger expressed that he hadn’t had any luck with woman, Ko was shocked.

“I’ve never even touched a woman, Bokuto-san!” The ginger whined in the locker room after a game. All of the other boys had left, and the pair always went back to the hotel together.

“I feel like….I don’t know how” He added and Bokuto raised a brow at the revelation. “Like..you! I see the damn scratch marks Y/N gives you, so you must be doing something right” Hinata said, his cheeks flushing a bit.

“Are you saying I’m good in bed. Shoyo?” Bokuto teased and the ginger groaned and huffed, shaking his head a bit.

“Can you teach me? Or…tell me how you do it?” Hinata asked “I can flirt and get girls just fine, but when we go to have sex- I don’t think I know how to please them enough”

Bokuto understood that better than anyone. When you two first began dating, he was more than inexperienced and he was terrified he wasn’t doing anything right.

It took practice, and soon enough, you were putty beneath Bokuto when you had sex. He was an absolute God in bed.

If only he had someone to teach him.

“I have a proposition for you, Hinata” Bokuto said before he sat next to the ginger on the locker room bench. “If Y/N is okay with it, I’ll let you borrow her for practice” He said.

Hinata nearly gaped at the offer. “Bokuto- I couldn’t do that! She’s your girlfriend!”

“Sure you can my man! I’m completely okay with it, if it’ll boost your confidence.” Bo said “And Y/N is good at this stuff! She helped me!” He said.

So it was settled. Now to get your permission.

“You want me to what?”

“I want you to let Hinata fuck you, he needs the practice” Kotarou said like it was nothing.

“I- what made you think of this?” You asked, shocked.

You’d just been lounging on the couch with Bokuto when he brought the topic up. He’d just gotten home and you were spending as much time together as you could before he had to leave again.

“He was stressing about pleasing women, and I was like that when I met you” Bokuto explained. Oh. So he felt bad for him.

“I…I guess I wouldn’t be opposed to it” You mumbled and he smiled. “Only if you’re there” You added and he nodded with a stern look on his face.

“I have to guide him- I’m not sending him in blind” Bokuto said “And besides, you are mine after all” He added and you rolled your eyes playfully.

The idea had your mind racing with not-so-pure thoughts. Having two big guys pleasing you? Oh god. You hoped you wouldn’t regret this…

“How’s next week sound, pretty girl?” Ko said and you nodded your head, the nerves in your stomach swirling at the mere thought of showing your boyfriend’s best friend how to fuck properly.

The night of the…uh act? You didn’t know what to call it, but it came quickly. Bokuto planned on bringing Hinata over for dinner and then afterwards “the fun would happen”, as your boyfriend put it.

He requested that you wore his favorite set, as he planned on getting in on the action too. He wasn’t fond of being left out, especially not by Hinata.

The poor ginger boy was a blushing mess when he arrived at your apartment, and you tried to calm him down with small talk, but that only seemed to heighten his nerves.

“Hey, Hinata” You spoke as he picked at his dinner, his cheeks properly flushed and his hands shaking like a leaf. Poor guy.

“No need to be nervous, think of this like volleyball practice” You said and he began to lighten up after that. Thank the Gods.

Once dinner was over and everything was cleaned up, Bokuto led you both to the bedroom, having Hinata sit in the chair near your bed so he could watch first.

Bokuto stood looming over you with a hungry look in his eyes. Your cheeks heated up at this, glancing to Hinata to see nearly the same look in his eyes.

Oh fuck.

“The first thing you have to nail is the way you kiss someone…like this” Bokuto said and moved to you, gently cupping your cheek before leaning down, pressing his lips to yours. You almost immediately moaned into his mouth just by the mere passion in his actions, allowing him to slip his tongue into your mouth.

Hinata watched intensely as you two made out, watching as Bokuto’s hands trailed to your waist and slipped under your shirt, gently squeezing at your plush hips.

Hinata was nearly a mess just watching something this intimate up close.

Bokuto pulled away, a small string of saliva connecting your mouths. A sheepish smile crossed your features he smiled. “Now she’s shy…” He teased before waving Hinata over.

Shoyo stood and made his way to you like he was a magnet, his eyes glued to yours.

“Your turn” Bokuto said and Hinata did as told. He gently cupped your cheek, tilting your head up to look at him before his lips met yours.

A gasp emitted from you as Hinata pulled your body flush to his, his large hand slipping under your shirt and traveling up your back.

He slipped his tongue into your mouth and your hands caught in his hair, gently tugging at the shorter strands near the nape of his neck, earning a grunt in response from him.

When Hinata pulled away, the same string of saliva held you together like with Bokuto.

“H-How was that?” He asked and scratched the back of his neck.

“Hinata..you were perfect, you did exactly what Bokuto would have” You said and your boyfriend smiled wide.

“See? You’ve got this ginger!” Bokuto said and gave you a smirk, moving to stand behind you.

“Stay in front of her” Your boyfriend ordered and Shoyo nodded his head. “Now, let’s get these off, hm?” He said and gently raised your shirt over your head, revealing the, nearly see through, bra you were wearing. He did the same with you pants, leaving you in your matching panties.

Hinata was a blushing mess “You’re so beautiful” He muttered and you blushed a bit.

Bokuto gently wrapped his arms around you from behind and you leaned into him. His hands trailed up and began to grope at your tits, emitting a small whine from you.

“She’s super sensitive, which means she’s very vocal…she’ll tell you if she doesn’t like something” Bokuto said and Hinata nodded his head profusely.

Bokuto’s right hand slid down your front and then into your panties, making your cheeks flush.

His middle finger found your clit and he began circling at a fast pace, causing you to throw your head back and let out a loud moan.

This lasted a bit, and Hinata was watching as you nearly fell apart in Bokuto’s arms.

“I like to play with her a bit, mark her up, bring her right to the edge…” Bo said right as you were close to cumming. He then stopped his movements, earning a pout from you.

“We’ve gotta let Hinata in on the action too, sweetheart” Bokuto said and you nodded “He can make you cum”

Hinata and Bokuto switched positions and you expected Hinata to have some trouble finding your clit, but he found it almost immediately, and he absolutely went crazy, his middle finger moving in circles at an ungodly pace.

“Hinata! Shit- that feels so good!” You cried out. His left arm supported your body weight as you leaned into him, loud and unpredictable moans leaving your throat.

“Fuck! Can I cum?” You asked and Hinata looked to Bokuto, who shrugged.

“It’s up to you Hinata” The man said and Hinata smirked a bit.

“Mm not yet, hold on a bit longer for me” The ginger cooed and you cried out in desperation.

“Please! Shoyo!” You begged and he hummed in confirmation before you came, your body shaking. Hinata held you up and helped you ride through the orgasm. He was good at this.

“Now give her some praise…she likes that” Bokuto said and Hinata nodded.

“You did so good for me” He whispers and pressed kisses to your cheeks and neck from behind you. “Good girl” He added and your cheeks flushed a deep red.

“Is….is that all?” Hinata asked and Bokuto raised a brow.

“Oh, we’re just getting started”

PART 1 of 2

[vainvenus]

⌲;꒰ Head over heels. ꒱

Pairing(s): Vance Hopper x Gn!Reader

Summary: You're the only person Vance can stand being around or talking to.

Includings: No Grabber!Au, best friends to lovers, chill x hothead dynamic, kinda ooc vance, jealousy, bit of a slowburn, mutual pinning, happy ending tho!

An: First post for Vancey boy! 💪🏾

I don't like the ending bc it was rushed a hard to write

"And now I'm the one who's in trouble! Me? Because that fucking dipshit and his stupid ass friend bumped into me!"

You hummed in response so that he knew that you were still listening to him as you were looking for your dark blue lighter.

You were listening to Vance rant, having just learned that he was now banned from the Grab-And-Go for a week for starting a fight all because some boy's bumped into the pinball game he was obsessed with.

"It's fucking stupid and I should've kept pounding his head into the floor until he passed out."

You had found your lighter and grabbed a lavender scented incense, lighting it and letting the flame burn before you blew at it and put it in the incense holder.

"It was an accident, Vance. You should've handled it more responsibly and walked away from the situation."

He had furrowed his brows, he knew that you were right but he was still too stubborn to admit it at the moment so he rolled his eyes.

"Whatever. The fuckers should've watched where they were going." He said, crossing his arms over his chest.

You nodded "Yes, they should have. I'm sorry you got kicked out, Vance. I'll make sure no one beats your high score."

Although Vance was in the wrong for him beating the boys up over a something like that you didn't want him to feel like the way he felt about the situation was invalid or him overreacting.

You walked over to your record player, going through a few of your discs to find something to play so that he at least wouldn't be in such a bitter mood.

You smiled softly as you pulled out one of the discs and put it into the record player, placing the stylus on it as it had started playing 'Dancing Queen' by Abba and you turned your head to smile at Vance.

"C'mon..I know you want to." You said, walking towards him and chuckling softly as you grabbed his hand and tried to pull him up from his spot on the bed.

"I don't fuckin dance... especially not to Abba." He said and you knew for a fact that he was lying because the last time you borrowed his mixtape player it was one of the first songs that played.

"Dancing is a good way to free your body from negative energy. Something you seem to have a lot of." You had said as you swayed to the music, the sound of the multiple bracelets you wore shaking together.

Vance narrowed his eyes up at you "That's bullshit."

"Is not! Works for me whenever I'm angry."

He furrowed his brows "I've never seen you angry before though."

"That's because I don't show it. I don't let my emotions control my actions or mouth. I find better ways to release my anger."

Vance had thought about that sentence for a while. He wondered what you were like if you were to finally snap like how he does, furrowed brows and shouting profanities like a sailor.

"Dance with me, Vance! C'mon!!"

He groaned as he rolled his eyes and stood up from his spot on your bed and stiffly moved to the song like he was a robot and you couldn't help but laugh.

"What's so funny?!"

"You dance like we're at our first dance together and the slow song just came on!" You had giggled. "Loosen up!"

Vance had glared playfully at you. "I thought this was a judge free zone?"

"Oh it is...just not for stiff dancers."

The boy had chuckled at this, a genuine one that showed his teeth and he couldn't even be mad about the situation that happened earlier.

It was always like this when he would go to you to rant for a bit, you would talk to him and make him feel like his feelings were completely valid, you reassured him every single time but scolded him rightfully.

You were the comfort he longed for constantly. That missing peace in his life. You felt like what home should've felt like for him.

You were sweet and caring. Not once could he think of a time where you yelled at him even if he was screaming his lungs out at you. You were understanding and he loved that, he love that you knew his better than he knew himself.

Vance loved you.

"Hey, Vance!"

He snapped from his thoughts as he looked over to you who was back at the record player, going through your discs once more. He was sure you had every song under the sun with the stack you had.

"Any song requests?"

"Hotel California."

"Gotcha!"

♡

When you heard your door swim open an slam shut you hadn't even questioned it at this point, already knowing who the culprit was.

You turned your attention away from the painting you were working on as you turned to look at Vance who looked like he was already angry if you couldn't tell by the door slam.

"What's the matter now?"

"Nothing. What're you doing?"

You had knew that he was lying but you would take care of what was bothering him when he wanted to talk about it so you gestured to the canvas.

"I'm painting. The sky's really pretty right now so I'm trying to capture it while I can." You had told him and he had rolled his eyes.

"You should try it. Painting can help let off steam." You said, dipping your brush back into the light pink paint.

You always tried to get Vance to paint or draw with you, telling him it was a good way to express his anger without yelling or breaking something but art just wasn't his forte.

"i don't paint. It's hard to work with and I'm not good at it." Vance had complained as he crossed his arms, standing beside you while staring at your painting.

"Oh c'mon, the last time you painted with me was a finger painting."

"I don't care."

You shrugged as you turned back to the canvas, glancing back at the sky before you went back and had glided your brush against the canvas, letting the music playing fill in the silence.

Vance shifted in the spot next to you, eyes glancing from the painting before back to the sky which was a mixture of soft purple, blues and pinks with the sun peaking from them.

He looked back to you as you were back into focus mode. Your eyebrows knitting together whenever you were like this and he couldn't help but smile a bit at the expression.

"Starings rude, y'know."

His face immediately shifted and he had scoffed "I wasn't staring, asshole! I was looking at the painting!"

"Mhm..you sure you don't wanna give painting another go? You don't even have to paint the sky you can paint your emotions and-"

Vance swiftly cut you off "Just give me a canvas and brush before you start with your hippie emotion bullshit."

You had giggled softly as you went to grab another canvas and easel, setting them beside your own as you gave Vance an empty pallette and set the paints between the two of you.

He picked up the blue paint and looked back over at you who seemed to be caught up in finishing up your painting and he had smirked.

He had opened it as turned his body a bit as he squirted it onto the palm of his hands, rubbing them together and pressing them against the canvas.

He watched as you turned to him with a smile before your smile had dropped. "Vance, really?! C'mon! I thought you were behind finger and hand painting! You're gonna make a mess!"

He had smirked, reaching out to touch you as you had backed away. "Vance Hopper! Don't!"

"Don't what? Do this?"

He had grabbed you arm to pull you towards him as he pressed his palm against your cheek now leaving a blue handprint there as he pulled away laughing.

"Asshole!" You had playfully shouted as you grabbed the pink paint and rubbed it across your palms, now pressing your hands against his face and he had laughed loudly as he pressed his hands back against yours.

You both pulled away to reach for more paint, a childish game now being played between the two of you as you were grabbing different colors.

Red, blue, pink, purple and yellow handprints were plastered all over your faces, arms and even shirts. Neither of you were mad at the mess though now on the floor and laughing at how idiotic the two of you looked.

"You're an idiot, Vance! I'm gonna have to take like four showers!"

"Oh stop complaing! You literally fought back."

You giggled as you looked at the red paint on your finger and rolled closer to Vance as you lazily drew a heart on the back of his hand.

Vance stared at the red heart with wide eyes before he looked back at you who had that same bright smile on your face that made his heart skip a beat.

"See, you could've just drew that on me but you wanted to be a childish asshole." You hummed, pressing red paint again this nose and Vance stared at you.

Yeah.

Vance had already fallen in love but he was falling harder.

♡

The next time Vance had came over he had noticed that you had the music playing again but he could also make out the sound of another person.

The two you seemed to be laughing together, the sound overbearing the song that was playing at the moment and he furrowed his brows.

He stomped up in the stairs and made a B-line for your room, gripping onto the doorknob, twisting it and pushing the door so roughly that it slammed against the wall when he entered the room.

His eyes glanced from you who was staring at him with wide eyes gore he glanced over the person you had been laughing with.

Bruce Yamada. somebody he wasn't too fond of just because he was everything Vance wasn't. Popular (for the right reasons), kind and caring, not a bad bone in his body. Everyone either wanted to be him or be with him.

He noticed that you were holding his hand with a bottle of blue nail polish in your other hand as the two of you were staring at him with wide and confused expressions.

"Vance. Stop entering my mom trying to catch me doing drugs."

"The hell is he doing here?" He completely disregarded your statement, glaring at Bruce and oh if looks could kill the Yamada's would be having a funeral.

Bruce had only smiled that award winning smile at Vance though "We're painting nails! You-"

He had cut him off swiftly, venom dripping from his tone as he spoke "I wasn't talking to you, asshole."

You had frowned as you looked up at blonde, placing the nail polish back in the tube. "Vance you shouldn't talk to him like that. He hasn't done anything to you."

You were right, Bruce was innocent and all he did was answer his question but Vance was acting on his emotions right now which were pure jealousy and fury.

"And? I wasn't fuckin' talking to him so why did he even reply?" Vance spat and Bruce awkwardly sat there.

You had narrowed your eyes slightly at Vance before inhaling and exhaling softly, looking back to Bruce with a small smile.

"Bruce, I'm sorry to cut this short but can we continue another time? I think me and Vance need to have a talk."

"Yeah..of course. Sorry for..uhm.."

"No, don't apologize. You didn't do anything wrong. You told him, glancing back to Vance back to him.

"Get home safe, mkay?" You commented and he had smiled and nodded at this. "I'll call you when I get home. Thanks for having me." He had waved you goodbye, slipping past Bruce and out the door.

Once you heard the door from downstairs close you had gathered up the nail polish and put them back into your box.

You turned to turn off the record player and looked back at Vance who was giving a distasteful look to the wall.

"Wanna tell me what that was about?"

He hadn't answered, keeping his eyes away from yours and after a short while he had just shrugged.

"Don't just shrug at me." With the way you were talking with him he was sure you were irritated and it only upset him more when he realized he ruined your mood.

"That was completely uncalled for." You stated, gesturing to Vance who looked like a child being chided for the first time.

He shrugged again, his words being stuck in that lump in his throat and he watched as you crossed your arms, shaking your head like a disappointed parent.

"I don't know what made you so upset before you came here but it gave you no right to call Bruce names and get angry with him."

Vance knew this, he knew he was in the wrong all the way this time but he couldn't help it, always thinking with his mouth and fists and never that head of his.

He huffed "Yeah? Well, he shouldn't even fucking being over here....with you...alone."

You raised your brows, holding back the urge to scoff "So you're the only one who gets to be alone in my room with me?"

"No! I...I'm not saying that but-"

"Then what are you saying, Vance?"

And there it was, that word vomit that he had been trying so hard to hold back.

"I'm saying that I love you, okay?! I fucking love you and every time I'm around you I just fall harder for you!" He shouted, voice cracking like he was on the verge of tears.

"So yes when I saw you alone, painting nails and giggling with Bruce 'Hearthrob' Yamada I was a little pissed off!"

It was silent after that.

Not even any music playing in the background to fill it up, just complete silence and the heavy pants of Vance.

It was probably four minutes of silence before you had spoke up.

"So you mean to tell me..you were rude to Bruce because you were jealous?"

Vance had gave a small nod, biting on the inside of his cheek.

You had let out a huff, chuckling a bit "Vance...that had got to be the most idiotic thing you've ever done. I don't even like Bruce like that, we're like siblings ."

"Oh.." Vance mumbled, now more embarrassed than before. He would definitely owe the boy an apology at school tomorrow.

"And plus, I'm not really into baseball players, I like people who play pinball."

His eyes widened slightly as he pointed to himself "You're... You're talking about me, right?"

"No Vance, I'm obviously talking about Moose. Yes, you."

"Why me?"

You tilted your head in confusion "What do you mean?"

"I mean, why me? I'm not definitely not a dreamboat like Bruce or-"

He was cut off by your lips on his, that vanilla flavored ChapStick you always wore now glossing over his lips and he stared at you like a deer in headlights when you pulled away.

You tilted your head and shrugged "I don't want dreamboat Bruce or any other person you're about to name."

You grabbed his hand and held him softly while grinning up at him "I want been my best friend for years troublemaker Vance."

It was quiet for a bit and Vance rubbed his thumb over the palm of your hand after you made it pretty clear that you weren't letting his hand go.

"You sure?"

You placed another kiss on his cheek, pretending to think for a moment before nodding.

"Positive. Couldn't see myself with anyone else."

He had smiled and brought you close to wrap his arms around you and decided that walking over to the bed would just be too much and he slid down the wall onto the floor with you.

With you laying on his chest and playing with his curls that definitely needed a good wash or brush he had heard you mumble;

"Well...maybe Keanu Reeves..."

"[Y/n]."

"Joking! Joking! You gotta admit he's pretty though"

He gestured to himself "Am I not?"

"Oh you are! Prettiest boy in Denver. But have you seen Keanu Reeves?"

Sure he had competition with Keanu Reeves but at least he knew that he outranked everyone in Denver.

[officallunar]

A Thief's Heart: Returning Stolen Hearts

Synopsis:

In the land of Teyvat, where adventure and friendship thrive, you find yourself entangled with the Traveler and the various heroes of Genshin Impact. You have a unique hobby - you enjoy "borrowing" items from the characters in the game, but your intention is always to return them, often with heartfelt notes attached.

Gn reader x some of the genshin men and women (separated)

(I lost count on how many people I am doing)

You mostly embark on a journey with them,on the way there, you would secretly take something from them, for example;their items.

Diluc would be confused at first before knowing that you have taken one of his belongings. As you continues to "borrow" items from Diluc, he can't help but chuckle at your audacity. He honestly think that it’s adorable but won’t say it out loud.

Kaeya might playfully tease you when he discovers your secret.

"Ah, so it seems we have a little mysterious thief among us. I must admit, your antics are quite entertaining."

When Childe finds out, he bursts into laughter, finding your actions both amusing and endearing.

"Haha, you've certainly caught my attention in the most unconventional way. I can't help but admire your spirit."

Venti, the bard, would probably respond with a whimsical comment like,

"Ah, stealing hearts as well as items, aren't you? Your mischievous charm is truly captivating."

Albedo might approach the situation with scientific curiosity.

"I find your actions quite intriguing. It's as if you're conducting a unique social experiment."

When Xiao first realizes that you have been taking and returning items from him, he might furrow his brows in confusion. After awhile you might see him crack a rare, small smile. (Please tease him)

Upon discovering your secret activities, Zhongli would approach the situation with a keen sense of curiosity. He might leave you a rare and exquisite Geo related artifacts out of admiration (he finds your joy of “borrowing” his things adorable)

Ayato, upon learning of your actions, takes it upon himself to investigate discreetly. He finds your behaviour cute and wonders about your motives .

When Alhaitham confronts you, his demeanor is measured, but he adds a soft touch of affection, saying,

"I must admit, I find your actions intriguing, and they've piqued my curiosity. Could you enlighten me about your motivations?"

Bennett would react with enthusiasm.He thinks that you're like a lucky charm and always returning what you take. Your positivity is contagious, and he can't help but admire your optimism.

Razor, while initially be confused, could express admiration with sincerity, saying,

"You not take. You return. Good friend. Razor likes."

Eula, though would be initially confused,but she will hide it by saying “Vengeance will be mine” (yeah im sure we all know what she is going to say)

Yanfei, a skilled legal advisor, may initially see your actions as legally ambiguous. However, she's impressed by your commitment to balance and might offer legal advice to help to your continuous actions within Liyue's laws.

Ganyu, being a diligent worker, becomes curious when she notices your activities in Liyue. She quietly investigates, wondering about your motives.She finds it cute and adorable often smiling when she see you sneakily sneaking off with her stuff.

Yae Miko, always on the lookout for interesting stories, takes notice of your actions and becomes intrigued.She would probably tease you abit or so

Im not really good at writing as it is my first few times writing a fanfic but I hope you enjoyed reading this!You can take this idea and write it if you want,I do not mind,but if you ever do write,I wanna read it 🥳🥳. I was reading a fanfic by @thatdeadaquarius and just got the idea to write it,it’s not the best lol. It’s not that I like Childe,it’s just that he is easier to write.

[jaeminlovesboomboomtime]

enhypen reaction to you calling them by their first name

Heeseung

“Heeseung what are your plans for today?”

“I’m sorry, what did you say?” he would ask with this face 😦

dawg was literally eating his cereal when you asked him this and just stared at you eating his cereal slowly

“Heeseung, I asked you what your plans were for today” you said rolling your eyes bc he wasn’t answering you 🥱

He then gets up out of his chair and walks over to you. he puts his arms on your shoulder and says “Please, enlighten me on what you said again”

your literally malfunctioning like a robot that just got water poured on it.

“Uhm no man”

“ugh ew don’t EVER call me man”

“Well then what do I call you, Heeseung?”

“I don’t know maybe like, Heedeungie or Bambi?”

his eyes would be sparkling sm i swear 🥹

unfortunately you would give in and call him ‘heedeungie’ and ‘bambi’

“What no i’m- i dont- ugh fine. ONLY because your my boyfriend and i love you <3”

he starts jumping up and down like a little child when he finally wins.

Jay

You’ve always really liked Jay’s perfume collection. He had some sprays that he’d let you borrow but you wanted some for your own.

“Hey Jeongseong, where do you get all these perfumes from?”

mans socks almost flew off his feet when you said his first name. 😇

“I’m sorry who the hell is Jeongseong?” he asked as if you didn’t know what had just came out of your mouth.

you, being a watery 🤡 just replied with, “Uhm who is the only man here with the name Jeongseong?”

blud looked at you so offended 😭

when you stood up from the couch dawg tackled you back on the couch and cuddled with you.

“I’ll get them for you-“

“Omg yay thank you so much!” you cut him off but he continues

“-Only if you don’t call me Jeongseong anymore.” he said looking at you with an eyebrow raised.

“Okay okay deal!”

man smiles at his success 😃

Jake

since winter was coming up, you still had your summer stuff out and really needed help putting it all away. Jake was doing nothing besides playing a game on his phone (let’s say rhythm hive 😍) so you decided ask him for help.

“Hey Jaeyun, would you mind helping me out by putting the summer shit in the shed? 😃”

🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️

“Uhm you good Jaeyun?”

🐌🐌

doesn’t make a big deal about it and decides to play along yk?

“Sure thing, Y/N. I’ll help you!” jake replied smiling from ear to ear.

You just stand there. You didn’t actually think that Jake would be so chill about it

🧍‍♀️

“What? What’s wrong Y/N”

“Ugh baby your ruined it!” you said playfully while running into the backyard.

“HAHAHA I SAUR GOT YOU GOOD.” Jake laughs and runs into the yard with you.

“You SAUR didnt 🥱🙄” you said mocking jake.

Sunghoon

blud is used to you doing this at this point. don’t even respond to you

“Hey Sunghoon what ya doing?” You ask.

“Oh nothing just watching TV.” He said as if it wasn’t obvious enough.

“Oh. Well Sunghoon I was just wondering if you wanted to watch a movie with me”

“Sure, I’ll pick the movie.” He said getting up

you were very confused on why he wasn’t reacting like you thought he would’ve. you honestly thought he would’ve been somewhat upset about it but he seems to not be bothered.

“Sunghoon can it be a action move please 🙏?” you asked. you called him sunghoon to see if it would tick him off but he didn’t budge.

“Hey! Why aren’t you reacting when I call you by your first name?” You ask upset

Sunghoon just slowly turns around and looks at you 😛

“Because, you do this to me all the time babe.”

“Oh”

🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️

you literally feel so embarrassed and now wanna dig your own grave.

Sunoo

Poor baby was so confused. he literally didn’t know what to do after what came out of your mouth.

“Hi Sunoo! Isn’t it such a pretty day out. Wanna go for a walk with me?”

babes just stood their with his mouth like 😦

looks around the room and then point to himself.

“Me?” he asked with his mouth still agape

“Yes you Sunoo! Who else is named Sunoo in this house?” you replied back

“No one..” he replied back softly.

“Do you wanna go for a walk with me Sunoo?”

“Only if you don’t call me Sunoo anymore. I like being call bub, baby, and ddeonu”

he was pouting and WHFILE he is saur cute.

sunoo rn:

🥺🥺

“Okay bub i’m sorry. I wont do it again.” You said smiling and hugging him.

happy sunoo = happy life

Jungwon

you and jungwon decided to do some ‘spring cleaning’ in your bedroom. yalls were cleaning underneath his bed when you found a skateboard

you always wanted to learn how to skate but never did because your older brothers were just asses 🙄

“Jungwonnnnn, ouuuu can you please teach me how to skate? please please pleaseeee?”

shy creature istg

“What? OH skating yeah mhm I could teach you!"

you literally spent the rest of the day learning and let's say you have scratches all over each your legs and hands..

He made it his job to place a a huge ass bandaid on each one and place a tiny kisthy on each one which eventually annoyed you.

MY HEART ❤️❤️❤️

Niki

you saw this trend on tiktok where people are making cakes of pictures of people but end up looking like it just fell 30ft in the air. you really wanted to do this with niki because 1. you were bored and 2. because you just love spending with with him.

you heard him coming towards the kitchen so you call him over

“Riki i wanna make something with you come here now please!”

he does that thing where he slowly turns his neck and pops his eyeballs out. (KSJDNDJISKOWOA IHOPE YALL KNOW WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT)

"What did you call me?" he says with a psychotic look while smiling in the hallway.

“Riki..baby..?”

he runs from the hallway, picks you up, and runs over to the living room to plop down on you.

"RIKIll HELP ME | CANT BREATHE"

acts innocent while your suffering

"So what did you wanna ask me? 😇😇😇 he says with his legs kicking back and forth while your under him

“I wanted to make a cake with you” you say out of breath.

“Oh yay! I love cake!” He says running back to the kitchen leaving you on the couch.

HAJOAPALA I CANT BELIEVE I FINALLY HAD THE NUTS TO POST 😭 yalls this is my first post so at least give me some credit for trying here ☹️ anyways, love yall. stay safe!! ❤️❤️❤️

[wishluc]

What do you think about multiple yanderes (like, an entire casts worth) after the same person? Word vomit ahead. Written with TWST and Obey Me in mind.

As chaotic as the idea seems, eventually they'd learn to work together towards this common goal of theirs. The beginning is sure to be the worst, but also the most crucial. If you play your cards right, perhaps you can walk away the victor?

Imagine: the strong, the powerful, the influential, all wrapped around your finger, all sitting by your feet. With that kind of power backing you, there's no telling what you could be capable of. There would be nothing you couldn't do. Nowhere you cannot go.

This power, however, is an unstable one, it is a fight against the tide, where one wrong move could have you swallowing seawater. Your suitors are as insatiable as they are numerous, and jealousy is an inevitably. If a fight were to break out, you'd plummet to the very bottom of the food chain. No longer the crown, you would instead be nothing but a spoil of war.

Not that harmony is any less dangerous, mind you. Borrowed strength can become shackles in the blink of an eye. With no power of your own, using others is all you can do to survive. You can only hope, then, that your only salvation will not become your downfall.

This balancing act, this tightrope on which you walk is so very lonely. But, with enough perseverance, perhaps you can carve out a place for yourself.

It is unfortunate, then, that any place from which you carve, will never be anything but a hollow hideaway.

Anon, you have a very lovely way of weaving words together. This was a joy to read (and to think about)! I'm sorry I couldn't reply immediately :( I've discussed a OM! brothers sharing a darling (w/ mention of the others) here, but if you want a TWST version let me know!

You'd think, with the avatars being brothers, that they could work together if the situation called for it.

It only takes about a week of trying to get used to your new arrangement for you to realize just how wrong you were. Even among themselves, you realize, the brothers have their own alliances of sorts. While it's understandable that the twins want to spend time with you and each other, you're still caught off guard by some of the others. It's easy enough to figure out some of their dynamics; Satan and Belphie squeeze closer to you when Lucifer tries to approach, Levi and Mammon, despite their constant arguments, whisk you away from the others to play video games, Asmo is constantly by your side when Lucifer is, clearly fascinated by something you're not aware of.

They don't show the same cooperation when they're all together, and it takes a toll on you. it gets exhausting to be the constant center, to know that everything you did could be taken in different ways. Asmo scowls when you reassure Mammon that he'll always be first in your heart, Lucifer's silent rage rolls off him in waves when you laugh at Satan's plan, Levi refuses to hear out your reasons when you're a few minutes late after being held back by another demon—it feels like you have to constantly think about the possible repercussions of every small action, or suffer the punishment.

At first thought, involving the others, like Solomon or Lord Diavolo, doesn't feel like a good idea. More suitors means more internal competition and more complications for you. But ultimately, it helps out your predicament. There's no denying that all of them are selfish, even Simeon, but they're more level-headed than the brothers at least, and can recognize that this shared arrangement is their best attempt at having you. And nobody would dare refute Barbatos whenever he declares that you've been summoned to spend the weekend at the castle instead; Lord Diavolo, Barbatos, Solomon and SImeon make for far better company than the brothers together.

Trying to manipulate anyone, whether it be to take some semblance of control back or find a way to get out of a situation you don't like, will likely be fruitless. In fact, it comes across as so pathetic and desperate that your lovers will be amused—a far better reaction than the anger that will boil over should they ever feel insulted that you thought you could control them—at the thought of a regular human trying to exploit them, and maybe even play along. Lord Diavolo, in particular, always receives your pitiful attempts with a laugh—though he does remind you that he much prefers if you say what you want from him outright. Mammon and Levi are easier to take advantage of as long as you say the right words in the right way, but if any of the demons are in a bad mood, your efforts will be received with thinly veiled rage and sharp words.

It might occur to you that coaxing just one person to your side, to suffer at the side of one, would be a much better fate than your current one; Solomon, Simeon, or Lord Diavolo being your most likely targets. Even if the brothers wanted to defy them, it would be complicated when considering their powers and status. You can try, acting coy and sweet with Solomon, who finds your coquettish smiles and teasing remarks endearing, and confiding in him your fears about the brothers and their tempers, or you could play into Lord Diavolo's fondness for you, with lingering gazes and disheartened expressions when he had to leave, turning him away with a dejected glance and words about how the brothers wanted you to spend the night at HoL instead, knowing how little opportunities he had to be with you. Simeon, too, was weak to your fond treatment, indulging in the warm smiles and heartfelt conversations you offer and your honeyed voice when you call out his name, consoling you after you get caught up in yet another argument between the brothers. Despite all your efforts, the result is unfavorable. You still have to cozy up to the dangerous figures keeping you here, still have to hide your plot from the brothers, which is hard when Lucifer always seems to know just where you were all day.

Any solace you find in the quiet moments—in Belphie's arms during a nap, in Satan's lap as he reads, lying against Levi and watching the brightly colored screen, resting your head on Lucifer's shoulder, letting Asmo paint your nails, sitting on the cold kitchen floor while Beel rummages through for a late night snack, and holding Mammon close to you, missing the days when it was only you and him together—is fleeting and harder to come by now that they've decided they all want a piece of you.

all works © wishluc. do not copy, steal or repost my works on other platforms. (including translations)

[cinnamonest]

Lena thank you for the fucking food (scara post). I didn't even get halfway into the story before I started laughing. Scara entering an early midlife crisis because of reader's colourful pens took me outtttttt like he is such a lil bitch

Other than that, I've been WAITING for a post where Scara goes ham on a darling that technically never did anything "wrong" and always treated him nicely/fairly, with nothing being good enough for him 😭

That's what makes any situation with him so hopeless, there is literally no way out. The man is so neurotic that he will just interpret literally anything you could possibly do or say in a way that fits a narrative he's already constructed in his head. He internally exaggerates everything you say and do so that any negative comment or action is a million times worse than it actually is, and even the nicest of your words have some hidden negative meaning or implication.

Moreover, you don't need to do or say anything at all, just your existence is enough to be annoying and being annoying is enough to warrant a fixation. It can be any demeanor too — he'll find a way to interpret it as irritating, and fixate on retaliating for your crime of annoying him, all while you are barely aware he exists.

And once that fixation is established, because it's based on something so broad yet so vague as your very existence, there's no way to undo it. It's also in large part that specific bitterness guys get where they're attracted to some girl that feels unattainable, so they take the “if I can't have her then she can't be happy” mentality.

But YES he IS suuuuuuch a little overdramatic bitch about everything even vaguely feminine darling does you're so right. For starters he’s a naturally severe case of cute-aggression, so anything perceived as cute automatically earns an intense reaction.

He’s also very much stuck in the immature boy mentality where anything he mentally associates as feminine is icky and dumb. Yet at the same time, he's attracted to it, so being attracted to and annoyed by the same thing creates a lot of internal confusion and frustration, which you WILL bear the brunt of.

Which is so much worse with e-girl darling because you know darling is gonna have the e-girl staple items. The sanrio-themed everything. The cutesy phone case. The cat-ear gaming headset. All the frilly lacey clothes and underwear. Awful. A complete waste of money. Why does it look so cute on you and why does that make him feel like punching a wall.

Even in consensual interactions, he has a comical degree of aversion and repulsion. No he's not sitting on your bed or borrowing your pen or using your controller. It's PINK. Are you out of your mind. Ugh.

[a-dumb-sarcastic-bisexual]

ROTTMNT Headcanons:

Every single person in New York knows who the turtles are  

They know their full names, ages, birthdays, social security numbers

They know everything about them they just don’t care  

Because the turtles keep to themselves and keep the city (kind of) safe they pretend like they can't see them  

But anytime there's a fight they think “the boys (and April) are at it again” and then they avoid that area like the plague

The boys (and April) share most of their stuff (i.e., clothes comic books, and action figures) with some small exceptions  

So, it’s not uncommon to hear someone yell “who took my sweatshirt! Come on guys you know that’s my favorite”

Or the occasional “are you wearing my shirt in that photo when did you even borrow it?”

April had a stash of the boy's sweatshirts that she’s been “meaning to give back” for 6 months now

Leo has given up hope on ever getting his 4town t-shirt back (if you think the boys didn’t watch Turning Red, you're lying to yourself)

April has a Disney+ account that they all use because Donnie said “if you can steal my tech to impress your girlfriend, I get to watch Treasure Planet as much as I want”  

And then the boys complained and said April was playing favorites

And now they all have the password

Every single Wednesday they sit down and have a movie marathon  

To keep the peace Raph made these rules “two boxes of pizza per person, one bucket of popcorn per person, and everyone gets to choose one movie”

Those rules fly out the window the second he conks out

Mikey’s movie always has to go first because he usually falls asleep within the first 30 minutes of the marathon  

Raph has to go next because he usually passes out after Mikey, they make fun of him for it every night  

Depending on how busy her week has been April will either fall asleep before or after the twins but she usually puts up a good fight (mostly cause she’s scared Leo will draw on her face)

Leo and Donnie always compete to see who can stay up the longest and again it usually depends on what kind of week they’ve had

Donnie is used to staying up late working on his tech but if his week was stressful, he can't make it past the fourth movie

And Leo is the resident insomniac who can't go to sleep unless he’s bone tired or medicated  

Honestly most nights they don’t know who went to sleep first because they pass out within seconds of each other

They both claim they won and everyone else calls in the tie  

Leo April and Donnie all secretly get together on Tuesdays and have a movie night of their own  

They find the worst movies at the bottom of the bargain bin and watch every single one

Donnie spends the night picking the movies apart while April and Leo laugh their asses off

Honestly, Donnie would have stopped coming to this meetup months ago because these movies are so damn frustrating to him  

But it’s nice to see April and Leo so relaxed so he watches the shitty movies they’ve picked  

Fridays are set aside for April and Raph to just relax they play soothing music put on face masks and just talk about anything and everything  

Saturdays are always Mikey and April days and they do a whole bunch of things sometimes they go to the mall, or they spend the day baking a cake, or painting

And sometimes during the really stressful weeks, they just sit next to each other and rest

And Sundays are April's alone days no one gets to text her or call her unless the city is falling apart  

The boys used to feel bad because they thought their friend was tired of being around them  

But then April kindly reminded them that she is an introvert at heart and even though her brothers are her people if she doesn’t get some alone time to recharge, she will have a mental breakdown  

Donnie pointed out that April probably wouldn’t want to leave the house on these days so the boys decided that every Sunday they would deliver her favorite games, snacks, and drinks on Donnie’s drone  

The first time they did it April almost cried (who’s she kidding she bawled like a baby) and gave them the biggest hugs on Monday  

[yanderes-galore]

Sombra needs a yandere alphabet! Please, I'm desperate qwp

Of course! We need more Sombra content anyways ^^ Decided to borrow a GIF off Tumblr this time.

Yandere Alphabet - Sombra

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Stalking, Manipulation, Breach in privacy/No privacy, Isolation, Kidnapping, Blackmail, Somewhat soft yandere, Overprotective behavior, Possessive behavior, Drugging, Possible poor uses of Spanish, Breaking and entering, Forced/Dubious affection, Jealousy, Forced relationship.

Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

Sombra is a yandere that knows just about everything about you. She spends the first part of her obsession stalking you and hacking into any personal info she can get. The second half is when she acts on her obsession.

I'd say Sombra's obsession is mostly tame. She's really hard to detect as a yandere at first, right up until it's too late. By the time you know about Sombra she already has you moved to a secure location off the grid.

Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

I have a feeling Sombra isn't big on being messy. She prefers to keep her hands clean and instead isolates her darling through manipulation and lies.

She's someone to blackmail and threaten others to get her way more than outright murder.

Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

Sombra would make sure the area she keeps you in is isolated yet cozy. No one may be able to find you except her. That way she's the only one you have to rely on.

She sees no need to mock you. She cares for you more than anyone else (She cares for Sigma, but not in the romantic sense). She plans to take care of you and hide you from Talon. If anything, having someone like her on your side should be an advantage.

Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

She tries not to, Sombra's not a monster (In her eyes). She respects you more than most would. She still treats you like a human even in your new isolated home.

She's just... looking out for you? That's why she keeps you away from others!

Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

Sombra is rather secretive so she isn't very vulnerable. Although you can tell by the tone of her voice when she talks to you and the gentle behavior of her actions that she cares. She doesn't wish to deprive you of comfort unless she has to.

She may be busy at times due to monitoring many networks and looking for any signs of you being searched for, but she cares. She won't pour her heart out entirely to you but she will indeed show she cares through little actions.

Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?

Disappointed and a little amused. She understands your fight, after all she took you from home like some abandoned animal. However... she sees this as just a little hiccup from you.

If you fight her she'll be sure to discipline you afterwards. It's hard to pinpoint her location due to her invisibility tech. She'll just surprise you and restrain you.

"Nice try... better luck next time, eh?"

Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?

Not a game and while she thinks its funny at first, it gets old. She originally thinks it's funny as she knows you can't leave. You won't even know where to go and she wiped any form of ID you had to keep you as hers.

Yet when you keep trying she begins to get... bored.

Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

Sombra is very tame compared to other Overwatch yanderes I've covered, but here's what I think.

The worst experience with Sombra is your abduction. You had no idea you were being tracked or stalked. Right up until she slips into your room.

It's scary as you had no idea of Sombra's existence in your life up until now. Sombra has been watching your life like a hawk, absorbing every little piece of information she can get on you. She's been in the shadows of your life... completely out of sight.

Then she's suddenly in your room, pinning you to a wall with a drug injected in your neck. You don't know who this woman is or why her gaze is so intense. Then when you wake up... expecting it all to be a nightmare...

You wake up in a room with her standing over you, a loving grin on her face.

"Welcome home, cariño."

Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

Sombra has fallen for you by chance while searching through your files. Part of her feels a need to protect you from the corruption of this world, while another part of her just wants you to herself. She plans to start a relationship with you... even when she keeps you so isolated.

She tries to convince you your love is unique... different from normal... special, even.

It's different from normal alright... yet not in the good way.

Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?

If Sombra is jealous she can hide it well. She tries not to concern you with it and it most likely happens early on in her obsession. If she's jealous of someone she gets to work on finding dirt on them.

Sombra will then use blackmail on those around you to keep them away from you. This makes it easier for her to wipe your presence from the world and isolate you. Then she can simply pluck you away from your old life.

Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling?

Sombra seems like she could be flirty, teasing, and affectionate with you when she wants. She took you in because she loves you, of course she wants to show that. As a result expect her to show/give affection when she's back from her missions.

She'll kiss you, hold you, cuddle you, etc. She'll try to cheer you up if you seem upset, which you most likely are considering the situation. What's scary is she seems like a genuinely loving girlfriend.

If you met her any other way, maybe that's what you could be.

However... she stalked you, drugged you, and acts like it's all okay. No one else knows about you now. It's just you and her.

She likes it that way.

Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

As stated before, Sombra's "courting" is primarily just stalking you. She spends her growing obsession gathering all sorts of information, pictures, and videos about you. She even does it all while you are unaware.

If you were also part of Talon, it's a different story. She'd be her usual persona while doing everything behind the scenes.

Again, for the most part you have no clue about her obsession until it's too late.

Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

I'd say so. She's always been secretive so she can mask her true nature/intentions well.

Naughty: How would they punish their darling?

Sombra isn't too big on punishment. She'd be a yandere who prefers to just lock you in a room more than anything physical. She wants to hear you admit you need her... only then will she let you out. She hates to hurt you though.

Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?

Just your freedom, your life can be somewhat normal besides the isolation.

Patience: How patient are they with their darling?

Very patient, it comes with her job.

Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

She'd have a really hard time, she acts stoic but if you died she'd be devastated.

Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?

A little but no.

Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?

Hard to say when it comes to her, maybe curiosity?

Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?

She tries her best to comfort you. She doesn't want you upset, she wants to love you. As a result she'll pull you in to comfort you.

"There's no need to cry... I'm here."

That's most likely why you're crying.

Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?

She works much more in the shadows than most yanderes/isn't obvious.

Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?

None, she keeps her weaknesses locked up well.

Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?

She tries not to.

Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?

Not a worship yandere but would go to great lengths to have you in her care.

Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

A long time. She can wait months to years to strike.

Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?

Most likely mentally.

[tlgtw]

//Spoilers for Everything in AC6: Fires of Rubicon//

The Meaning of the Motif of "Borrowed Wings" and how G5 Iguazu Exists to Reinforce It

What seems to fly over everyone's heads about G5 Iguazu is that the point of his character is how 'deciding upon a goal and having the willpower to strive for it, no matter what' is literally as important as the line between life and death.

You need to find a purpose for yourself that you personally believe in. Cause no matter how grand or how petty that purpose is, if you don't have one... you die!

With whether or not you actually succeed at that goal being completely irrelevant... to your conviction for it.

(Something, something, it's the ambition that you're living for, not whether or not you get the accolades at the end.)

A moral proclaiming the importance of "deciding upon a purpose of your own free will, and then pursuing that goal no matter what setbacks you encounter" is all nice and easy when you're main character e621, who experiences no setbacks because, as the player, you're necessarily going to be strongest fighter in the galaxy.

But it's pretty obvious how trite that is on its own, where your only canonical character trait is that you always win no matter what.

And so, Iguazu's purpose narratively is to show how, beyond any ounce of doubt whatsoever, that 'winning' is not a relevant part in what makes "having a purpose" so important, or so necessary.

In essence: It's what makes Iguazu live.

Start of the Game: Volta and Iguazu both want to beat up Michigan.

- Volta gives up, and then he gets sent by Michigan to die at the Wall.

- Iguazu deserts. And he does not die at the Wall.

After Gallia Dam he send you hatemail to say that the Redguns will scale the wall, but Iguazu himself doesn't even approach the Wall after this. As G4 Volta's last words reveal, he deserts before the operation is attempted.

Iguazu *himself* watches from the sidelines, costing him no less than an almost certain death like Volta's.

And the reason Iguazu changes his mind about scaling the wall with the Redguns is because, after Gallia Dam, Iguazu decides upon his purpose. His personal conviction.

Iguazu personal goal becomes -> He wants to kill you.

We love pathetic boys.

But the reason Iguazu deserts for the sake of this new goal is specifically because he wants to become stronger than 621, and not want his obligations as part of the Redguns to get in the way of this goal of his, he goes independent.

--- Correction ---

Iguazu deserts the Redguns at Watchpoint Alpha, prior to the death of G1 Michigan. He doesn't desert the Redguns at the Wall, he only goes Away WithOut Leave. The reason for which he goes AWOL being to take independent work, as we see an example of at Grid 086. Outcomes of everything are still the same, I just mixed up the order.

Also;

Volta: "Iguazu, listen, like, Michigan really like cares about us...! It's like we're part of his family, man, just give him a chance."

Volta: *Gives Michigan a chance*

Volta: *Gets killed under the leadership of G1 Michigan*

It's really funny but sad.

It's also really funny and sad how effective at Yank-bait G1 Michigan was.

But it's illustrative of how effective it is to break down someone's expectations and feelings of self-worth to legit 0, such that empty platitudes like simply saying the right words, like the names of the expendables themselves or to bring in the medical teams after a battle (as if they wouldn't have come otherwise?), will leave such an impression that they think you really do care about them--even in despite of how worthless they obviously are~!

And all at the same time as your direct actions and orders lead them straight to their meaningless avoidable deaths.

What could be more cost-efficient for your employers than soldiers who're literally suicidal for you, right?

Ha!

--- ---

And not only does this decision directly lead to Iguazu not dying at the Wall, but, no longer squeezed under G1 Michigan's boots, G5 even directly improves as a fighter.

This is shown in how his AI differs between his fighting at the Gallia Dam--where he's overly defensive, constantly having his shield up, despite wielding two guns.

And then, later at the Grid--where he actually fights aggressively like his AC's loadout is built for.

The second major encounter with Iguazu is Watchpoint Alpha where he either fights you directly, and dies there. Or he hires Coldcall to kill you, and survives elsewhere. Again, this is an instance of Iguazu's legitimate determination towards his chosen goal directly separating him from life and death.

When he hires Coldcall, Iguazu focuses on his goal, and let's go of distractions like his personal pride and image.

Ridiculous, right? Iguazu letting go of his pride?

But consider how it's directly Iguazu's personal feelings that lead him to facing 621 personally. He doesn't *just* want to kill you in that instant, he wants the glory of killing you as well.

But the accolades at the end aren't what makes it worthy to pursue a chosen goal.

Iguazu wants 621 dead. And when he hires Coldcall, this is him coming to terms with pursuing his goal, regardless of his personal setbacks. Iguazu faces the fact that he personally wouldn't be able to kill you. And, because he comes to term with this setback, he finds an alternative method that would still lead towards fulfilling his chosen purpose.

To confirm, of course, Iguazu's purpose is really dumb and terrible. But it's not whether one's chosen purpose is 'a good goal' or not that the value of pursuing it comes from. The value comes from it being one you decided for yourself, as opposed to, for, for example, by a corporation's profits. (Not a coincidence narratively how Balam's forces, united most in their complete idolization of G1 Michigan, following *his* word no matter what even knowingly to their deaths, are the deadmost losers in the story.)

Unlike for example e621's chosen conviction, or Rusty's chosen conviction, (Also no coincidence narratively that G1 Michigan, who only exists as the weapon of his corporation and put out a bounty for his own assassination--expressing how he has no personal plans for the future and literally wants to die--is guaranteed to be taken out by either of these two, no matter what.)

It's not the loftiness of a goal that determines if it's of worth to decide upon one of your own free will and pursue it in the first place.

The 'value' of pursuing a goal is unrelated to what that goal itself is.

What makes pursuing a goal valuable, is the conviction.

You don't have to be smart. You don't have to be emotionally mature. You don't have to be a good fighter. You don't even have to be brave.

You just need to choose your purpose and follow it.

This is what the motif of 'wings' and 'borrowed wings' are all about in the story as well. It's about pursuing a goal that was chosen by someone else, versus pursuing a goal that was chosen by you yourself.

"They choose what to fight for, and take to the skies in flight."

"One cannot fly on borrowed wings" in this case literally meaning that if you pursue a goal not because you want it, but because someone else wants it, it will directly lead to your death.

Criticizing their "borrowed wings" is what Ayre and Rusty chastise the RLF for for solely repeating slogans and "not bothering to think [for themselves]."

And Iguazu, deciding he doesn't care about how he'd be seen by others, and only caring for the goal itself to be accomplished. Survives, where Coldcall dies in his place.

Coldcall, a far superior fighter to Iguazu. Dies, instead of Iguazu, because he was flying for Iguazu's purpose -> Fighting on borrowed wings.

Etc etc "this is hell, we're in hell!" and so on and in the Alea Iacta Est true ending of the game Iguazu, outta nowhere!, becomes the legit Final Boss of Armored Core 6.

How the hell did this 4th-gen AC pilot, otherwise a completely random nobody without a purpose not given to him by his employer, get to outer space and stuff, right?

Well, consider how the complete rando that was e621 does the same: Their personal conviction.

"But Iguazu only got to become the final boss out of dumb luck," right? ALLMIND chose him for little else but that he was the only old-gen Augmented Human that was still alive. If ALLMIND wasn't there, he couldn't have accomplished anything, so obviously it can't actually be meaningful.

But how would 621 have escaped Institute City without being rescued by Carla? How would we have escaped Arquebus re-education without the AC that Handler Walter secretly assembled left for us?

And, most relevantly here since this is the Alea Iacta Est route itself: How would 621 have known about V.II Snail planning to ambush you in Institute City without ALLMIND herself's very assistance?

C4-621 is, at a glance, just as much a recipient of dumb luck as Iguazu.

But thematically, it's not pure happenchance.

It's the results of the both of these characters continuing to fight for a cause they chose to believe in, no matter what.

So Iguazu survives. He survives the hijacking of Watchpoint Alpha by ALLMIND. And he even goes so far as to survive the hijacking of his own brain by ALLMIND, taking over the final boss even after being assimilated.

"What essential difference made ACs superior to unpiloted craft?"

The answer is simple -> One cannot fly on borrowed wings.

Unpiloted craft can never have a purpose that is actually their own. They exist only for the person who's wings they borrow--who's purpose they serve--who built them.

That's why piloted ACs are better. *Not* on borrowed wings, in this case, they can fly higher.

For C4-621, that chosen goal is to achieve Coral Release. (Since it's is still the mission you yourself choose that finally puts you on the Alea Iacta Est route or not, it fits within the theme of free will. Even though, as a videogame, there's an obvious limit to just *how* much free will the player is actually able to express. Within the story, however, when 621 chooses the mission to begin the path to an ending, that's them deciding for themselves 100% that's that the goal they want to achieve, no matter what.)

For Iguazu, that chosen goal is to kill you. (The goal he wants to achieve, no matter what.)

And so, because he was not flying on borrowed wings. Iguazu survives fucking everything. Stupid wings, yeah. But that just shows: What matters is only that they were his own.

Even against the most powerful super duper AI mastermind that ALLMIND was, the biggest loser on Earth, G5 Iguazu, survived.

Where even she is made to give way to Iguazu's conviction -> Killing e621.

Hammering this point home is why "I'm only here for what *I* want! I don't care about ALLMIND's goals, just my own!" is basically the only thing Iguazu says across like 2 entire 3rds of the final boss.

Iguazu's chosen goal is not ultimately successful.

But it wasn't whether or not Iguazu ultimately killed 621 in Rubicon's exosphere that lead to him not dying at the Wall like G4 Volta, or at Watchpoint Alpha like G1 Michigan and Coldcall, or upon the destruction of his physical body by ALLMIND.

It was his conviction that lead him past those things. His WINGS!

He chose what to fight for, and he fought for it.

On the wings of his free will, Iguazu flew above even the very clouds of Rubicon itself.

And that's why he was the Final Boss.

The only thing able to finally kill him being the person with a conviction even greater, C4-621.

(As a sidenote; Taking account of the main moral of Armored Core 6 really puts into perspective how many trillions of times it gets repeated explicitly across the game lol.

VS Rusty, VS Rusty when he calls you "power without a purpose," VS Cinder Carla, VS Handler Walter, Ayre's description of what the name "Raven" is literally supposed to mean, etc.

They all talk about how you've chosen your path and you'd made sacrifices to get this far and you finally have a conviction that is your own and how big a deal that is and so on.)

[dailycass-cain]

Alright time for my thoughts on the McFarlane Toys Target exclusive DC Multiverse Gold Label Batgirl (Cassandra Cain) action figure.

As I said when the figure was first announced it's a "Frakenstein's monster" of past McFarlane Toys Batgirl (Barbara Gordon) figures.

The top is from the "3 Jokers" Batgirl while the rest (including the belt) is based on the very first Batgirl figure McFarlane Toys released (the Sean Murphy redesign).

It's not the first time Cass has borrowed from a Babs Batgirl figure. Mattel did it. Even Imaginext did a Burnside Batgirl in all of Cass's colors.

So it has all of their articulation.

Comparing the prior McFarlane Toys Cass figure (the Page Puncher from last year). Comparing the two in molding details, paint, and accessories: the left-hand one is exceptional.

However, articulation the right hand Batgirl wipes the floor with the other. The Pagepuncher is quite hard to stand up by itself without the stand and you can only do a few poses with it due to the molded on batskin lower gear and belt.

Even with it being old molds from McFarlane, the new Batgirl figure takes the crown of being the most posable Cass action figure ever. Destroying not only the DC Direct pair.

So what about it and the Mattel (the long-running champ)?

Well, articulation-wise, McFarlane Toys takes Mattel with "newer" action figure tech. What really takes the crown as THE BEST Batgirl action figure is one of its new parts and its "secret weapon": the wired cloth cape.

The fabric ain't Mafex quality (you can see through the cape). However, like a Mafex the wire is in there go with no fear of popping out. Because it is a wired fabric (and not plastic) you can get some pretty AMAZING pictures with this Cass.

The cape and newly sculpted head make this probably THE best Batgirl figure we've gotten (so far) because you can get Cass in some crazy kickass poses.

If there's a big gripe I have with the figure is the accessories we get. They're from the Murphy Batgirl, and while the grapple gun got a HUGE paint makeover, the BIG Batarang (while also repainted) just feels so out of place.

Instead, McFarlane should've just given us alternate fist hands or an unmasked face (either would've made this would've made it even better).

That's where MODDING comes in handy.

Even with the flaws, this figure is something to behold. It's a game-changer. All caped Bat Fam members have to be content with this exceptional figure and now those who came in the past feel "dated" because of it.

On the plus, for Cass to be the one to get this. Yeah, it feels GOOD. Like, years of wait and McFarlane Toys gives us this banger of a figure.

Like, I keep taking either one I own and begin messing with it with crazy posing.

IT'S JUST SOOO GOOD! 🥺🥺🥺

Therein lies the final flaw.

That this figure IS a Target exclusive. Cause with all I've said, I can easily see this figure being IN DEMAND, and like DC Direct Stephanie Batgirl (or Mattel Cass) before her probably eventually carrying a HEAVY price tag in the aftermarket over time.

Unless of course, McFarlane Toys pulls a McFarlane Toys and does variants with this figure over from now and then. I can easily see it given that this figure is called BATGIRLS (Cassandra Cain).

You don't say that and not tease a future Steph figure.

Cause um Stephanie needs one given we only have two (DC Direct and Mattel). It feels… wrong.

So if already don't have this figure, and you see this figure on a Target shelf? BUY ON SIGHT. You won't regret it. This figure is EXCEPTIONAL even with the reuse. The wired cape and Cass's design aesthetic makes her so GOOD.

Dare I say she's the best McFarlane Toys female DC figure?

I dare. I DARE!

So those who have her: what do you think? Do my words add to what you feel? Do they not? I'd love to know.

[misscammiedawn]

Derealization in Night in the Woods and Metal Gear Solid 2

This post contains discussions and descriptions of severe dissociation that may be triggering to those who experience those symptoms and details themes of abuse, war and alcoholism please be kind to yourself when reading. Full game spoilers for NitW and MGS2.

In my Media, Myself and I series of posts I've been talking about depictions of Dissociative Identity Disorder in media. Highlighting good representation because I think it's easy to tear down what doesn't work, but showing what does is a very teachable moment. Best way to increase understanding and tear down stigma is to show understandable and relatable examples. Even if they're imperfect.

To that end, I wish to take a mild distraction from talking about identity focused symptoms of dissociative disorders and do some posts on elements of dissociation which aren't highlighted as often, particularly not well.

Depersonalization/Derealization Disorder is on the dissociative spectrum and the symptoms are experienced within forms of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and Dissociative Identity DIsorder.

To borrow an info-graphic I utilized in my Hypnosis and Dissociative Disorders essay a while back

Source: Mayo Clinic

The brain processes the world and our association within that connects the concepts of "Me" and the concept of "Reality" and integrates them so we are able to process external reality and express our internal reality.

When we look at our hand we can look at it and understand "this is my hand", the shape of it, the sensation of proprioception, the knowledge that we are able to move it and it will move based on our innate intention. There is no process of "I want to move my hand, I am going to move my hand, my hand is moving" it all happens as part of one seamless process.

A practice within hypnosis for creating a sense of dissociation required for trance states is to have a person look at their hand and turn the phrasing from "my hand" to "that hand". Gradually having a person look at a thing until our brains stop processing it in relation to our surroundings until it "detaches" as a way of temporarily removing critical filters in an effort to lead a person to an altered and suggestible state.

A good example of this one can experience without assistance is to stare into a mirror for an elongated period of time. Our brains are always attempting to process a large amount of information and presents context to you that changes "those images on the mirror's surface" into "my reflection", it's why we are able to feel familiarity as a sense. When we perceive something that activates those associations the relevant information automatically filters in our mind and presents the concepts associated with the stimulus.

If we stare at the same reflection for too long those associations begin to disintegrate and we begin to view them divorced of the contexts we hold for them.

For those who suffer dissociative disorders, this is the root of why someone with DID will not "recognize" their reflection or why a person may not feel familiarity with something/someone they are aware of.

Dissociative amnesia is a topic I wish to cover in a future essay but it is also included in this process. Essentially when we dissociate our minds lose the ability to effectively filter what we are perceiving and relate it to our selves, our memories and our experiences.

Derealization is what happens when that critical filter between the external world and our internal perception breaks down. It's when we are not processing the world as being something we are engaging with. This may present as a disconnection between our perception and our understanding, for example "my hand feels like it's larger than it looks" or it can be a complete disconnect from what is happening in your present reality causing you to feel like you are in a dream. In extreme cases you lose your ability to relate your actions from consequences.

Let me tell you, having this happen while you're behind the wheel of a moving vehicle is terrifying and I hope no one reading this ever has to experience that.

I should also note that these symptoms tend to get dramatically worse the more you focus on them. In my own life, if I have a sensation that parts of my body feel incompatible with my inner perception of them then the vague dysphoria can blossom into full dissociation if I try to examine the feeling in any depth.

For an everyday version of it, think about the sensation of Deja Vu and how it feels like you have already experienced something which is happening in the present. During that state you are dissociated enough from processing your present reality that it "feels" like you've already experienced it, despite the knowledge that you are currently in the moment.

All of this is to give a vague view of what Derealization is and what it feels like.

Today I want to share two pieces of media that include a character overtly experiencing these symptoms and how the fiction displays the character experiencing this internal experience so that an external audience may understand.

Night in the Woods is a 2017 narrative driven adventure game by Infinite Fall. It follows two weeks in the life of Mae Borowski, a 20 year old cat suffering from severe anxiety who has dropped out of college and returned to her childhood home, an impoverished Western Pennsylvania mining town named Possum Springs.

There she moves back in with her parents and reintegrates with the rural community of Possum Springs. She spends time with her childhood friends, talks to the locals and tries to solve the mystery of a severed arm found in town. All while having vivid dreams on a nightly basis and dealing with the an ambient level of judgment from her parents, friends and community over her perceived irresponsibility.

Where Mae is trying to solve the mystery of the severed arm and the secret cult that hides within Possum Springs, the audience has some other mysteries to solve attached to the attitudes of some of the residents. Mae's parents and friends constantly pressure her to explain why she felt it necessary to drop out of college when so much was sacrificed to get her there. There is also "The Incident", a mysterious event in Mae's past, ominously hinted at when Mae's next door neighbor warns...

"No one's forgotten who you are and what you did, you know. Small town polite's all you got, kid."

The player is left in the dark as to the circumstances that paint Mae's reputation in town and throughout the course of the two weeks we begin understanding more about Mae's past, the circumstances behind her return to Possum Springs and the reasons those around her harbor a mild resentment towards her.

There are some potential supernatural elements relating to Mae's dreams and the nature of the cult but I feel it is best to stick to the grounded elements of the plot for the sake of this essay.

The Incident, it is revealed, is that 6 years before the game Mae beat another kid with a softball bat. Seemingly unprovoked. It earned her the nickname "Killer" and shaped much of the way people in the town, including Mae's own parents, view her.

"Why did you beat Andy Cullen?" and "Why did you drop out of school?" are questions people constantly demand of Mae and it forces her to become defensive and prickly to those around her. There's even a sequence involving a heated argument between Mae and her mother when the latter drops her kindness and patience over the matter and demands answers that Mae refuses to give.

To give the game away without fanfare, Mae suffers from extreme dissociation.

She's ashamed of it, afraid of it and the local town doctor, who I will discuss shortly, has no meaningful way of helping her deal with it. Mae is left to journal about her feelings with no meaningful way of understanding her symptoms or preventing them from crippling her. It is not even referred to as dissociation within the plot of the game, though those who are familiar with derealization will recognize it easily.

If you wish to see the conversation where Mae confesses her condition, it is about 4 minutes long and will provide some context, though I will brush over the description if you do not have time/ability to watch and listen.

Mae describes a time when she was playing videogames and felt an intense empathy towards the characters on screen. She felt like she knew them intimately and at a certain point something "broke", she came to understand that the characters she had been so connected with were not real. She was not actually connected with the events happening on screen, it was all a game.

And in understanding that she felt alone and abandoned on her side of the screen and the sensation spread out to the view outside of her window. The trees blowing by in the wind were as fake and distant as the characters in the video game. She had memories and attachments and associations with that tree, but looking at it from her window she could see that it was just a tree. Just an object.

"Just shapes"

This disconnect spread into every aspect of Mae's life and all of the associations she had built between herself and the world around her had vanished and she found herself in a world that she no longer felt attached to in any meaningful way.

"Just like this meaningless bulk of... stuff."

She felt alone. Abandoned. Overwhelmed by the simultaneous enormity and emptiness of everything.

The next day during the softball match she cannot even remember how it happened but she ended up ontop of the mass of shapes that was Andy Cullen and... that was The Incident.

Mae's family lost a lot of money paying off the medical debt for Cullen's family and everyone's attitudes towards her turned cold. She was sent to Dr. Hank for therapy... and this is where I take a break to discuss the causes of dissociative disorders and how badly Mae was let down.

The root causes of DPDR are the same as other dissociative disorders in that extreme abuse, neglect and continued stressful situations cause the mind to put up barriers and break associations to protect the self from harm. To boil a complex idea down to a few words consider the mind saying "This is not happening to me." as a way to prevent pain from an experience.

Where identity based dissociation focuses on the words "to me" and removes the self from the harmful events, derealization focuses on the words "this is not happening" and rejects the events outright, refusing to process the context behind what is happening.

Much of the game's story is told through implication and one must peel back layers in order to get a full story. At first glance Mae may seem like a normal young woman from a rural community in the rust-belt and question what could have been enough for her to develop a dissociative disorder.

First off, don't do that. No one owes anyone a justification for their condition and there is no such thing as "traumatic enough" to be valid for a diagnosis. What a person experiences is what they experience. But Mae is fictional and the core of her character is having an under-treated dissociative disorder. Half the reason I wanted to write this entry was because her depiction of it is deeply relatable and can be used well for teaching what goes into a person developing PTSD and dissociative disorders; most depictions seem content with sexual abuse or violent deaths.

For Mae, it's a lot more subtle and all too human. At least, for a cat in a world of anthropomorphic animals.

Mae's mother, Candy, never went to college and always regretted it. She feels like her life hit a dead end and she has remained in the mining town of Possum Springs decades after its mining industry faded out. She works as a receptionist at the local church, spends all day reading True Crime novels and had a number of miscarriages before finally giving birth to Mae, her "miracle baby".

Mae's father, Stan, was working with the mine when it closed down and has since been bouncing between job to job trying to keep his family afloat, especially after the medical expenses from The Incident, the subsequent remortgaging of the house and Candy's dreams of sending Mae to college. Stan tries to be a good father but hates his job, is always working and it is revealed he used to be an alcoholic.

Lastly you have Mae's Grandfather. He is dead before the game starts. Mae loved her granddad very much and his influence can be felt throughout the whole game. He would read to her, pay attention to her and teach her things. One of the game's DLC chapters even involves him reading Mae a bedtime story.

Also grandpa Borowski was a union man and collected the teeth of an employer who tried to abuse the workers. That doesn't really play in to my essay as Mae does not discover this fact until the events of the game but I am not going to go without hyping up a man for taking teeth.

Mae misses him so much that even 6 years after she was asked to keep a journal by Dr. Hank the first page reads "RIP Granddad" and as the game goes on the following can be found inside:

This information is drip fed to us through organic and relatable moments. For instance, Mae reveals her father's alcoholism while she is drinking too much (sidenote, she is underage for the location she lives) at a party.

The idea is to give a full and rich view of Mae's life and show that she may not even recognize the trauma for what it is and was.

For instance, we know from the start that Mae has crippling anxiety. This could easily be linked to the expectations of Candy putting her hopes and dreams of college on her "miracle baby". Before Mae was even born she had expectations placed upon her for being the long wanted child of a mother who wanted her baby to do all the things that she never could.

For neglect you have the fact that both parents are forced to work in abundance to maintain their lifestyle and pay for Mae's college in an economically depressed community. Mae spent a lot of her home life alone, feeling pressured by her mother and literally scared of her alcoholic father.

Both parents are good and loving and kind parents. But they failed in some regards. Sometimes you can want the best for someone you love and do everything you can to provide the best life and a failure to listen, adapt and accommodate can do more harm than anything.

Her grandfather eventually passed away, taking her positive links away in her home life and after The Incident she was ostracized from the community and forced into further isolation. Socially anxious, outcast and without her supportive grandfather, she eventually is given an opportunity to go to college. Something her childhood friend would have literally killed for an opportunity to do in her stead.

---and she drops out.

---and upon returning no one will get off of her case about it.

This damned statue did it.

A statue so loathesome to Mae that it appears in her nightmares and she relives the fantasy of smashing it to bits with a baseball bat.

If you watched the above video (or have played the game) you will know that the statue was made up of several shapes and was installed at Mae's college.

The sight of this statue terrified Mae to the point of which she would spend entire days holed up in her dorm room either not eating or gorging pizza and sleeping for days at a time.

Being away from the familiar sights and people of her home town made her dissociative symptoms go into overdrive. At home she knew that The Tree that had lost all meaning and association to her was still the tree that she played with when she was young. She knew that her parents are the people who raised her. Even when she saw them as "dead shapes" the memories persisted and she could endure.

At college it was nothing but strangers in a strange land and a statue comprised of shapes reminding her that everything was shapes.

But they sent her to therapy, did they not? Why wasn't she being treated?

Dr. Hank is a small-town doctor he is the physiologist, he is the dentist, he is the psychologist. He is the doctor. The only doctor and he has no idea how to treat someone with severe symptoms like Mae.

In town Mae can talk to a character named Selmers every day. Selmers is a self-styled poet with depression and also being seen by Dr. Hank. In discussing both mental healthcare treatment and depression with Selmers the player can learn that Dr. Hank treats all forms of mental illness the same. Essentially "journal until you feel better". The town lacks the structure and framework to provide help to someone like Mae.

In other words she has been untreated this entire time and removed from her support network and sent off to college, she could not handle things. Of course she was going to fail under those circumstances.

The game does a remarkably good job of displaying how DPDR can impact a person, especially as it is linked to anxiety and depression, and creates an empathetic narrative about what it must be like to live with that condition.

Sadly it offers little in the way of answers for treatment. In reality treatment involves psychotherapy and creating a structure of coping mechanisms for how to handle episodes and ground oneself. This can come in the shape of breathing exercises, kinesthetic sensation fixation, identification exercises ("name all of the blue items you can see" "name all of the items that begin in A") but above all else, getting a grip on what emotional triggers one has and learning to resolve them will help.

For Mae, being away from home is a trigger for her. Home isn't going to be the same place and people forever. She needs to be able to get on top of her symptoms in order to cope. Dr. Hank was not helping her with that.

The game ends on a bittersweet note that Mae may end up spending her whole life in Possum Springs purely from fear of leaving her zone of familiarity.

Unfortunately the narrative is about clinging to a dying town and how unsustainable it is.

We do not know what will happen next. The structure that failed Mae has only gotten worse in the 2 years since she left for college. Her parents may end up selling the house because they cannot keep up on the payments and on a long enough timeline Gregg and Angus will move away (should their relationship survive the effort to escape) leaving Bea and Mae to watch Possum Springs continue to decay.

Part of Mae's journey is accepting this inevitability and not fighting it, but choosing not to abandon the town regardless. After all, she can't stray from it without a risk to her mental health.

The game offers no answers. It simply shows a slice of hard reality for those who live caught in the trap of decaying towns, economic collapse and mental illness without support structures and treatment. but it does a very good job of providing an empathetic case that an audience can relate to and sympathize with the symptoms of.

But what about a game that tries to make the audience feel the same way that the character does...?

Metal Gear Solid 2 is a 2001 self-proclaimed tactical espionage action game developed by Konami.

It tells the story of a secret military operations agent code named Raiden who is attempting to save the US President from a terrorist group called Dead Cell. There is much more to it. But I am attempting to be brief.

Metal Gear is absolutely frustrating for me to write about in this essay series because their research tends to be fairly good but their sensitivity often comes off as actively malicious at best.

In terms of conditions, symptoms and sensitivity to emotional triggers, Raiden is on paper a fairly decent representation of dissociative disorders developing in those who grew up in war. In practice he has a murder alter named Jack The Ripper who breakdances with 3 katanas.

I promised I would stick to positive depictions only and so I will stick only to the final 2 hours of Raiden's first appearance.

At this point in the game the president is dead, we have learned that the terrorists were really after a giant battleship that houses a powerful AI which is going to be used to censor the internet to control the flow of information and control the populace. Raiden has met up with protagonist of the first Metal Gear games, Solid Snake, and has managed to install a virus into the AI system that will corrupt the data and prevent it from controlling the internet.

In order to get on the battleship, Snake betrays Raiden and hands him over to the terrorists.

Thus begins the final act of MGS2.

It is imperative to understand that these events happen in rapid succession right after the AI is infected with a virus.

Neither the audience nor Raiden are given an opportunity to truly process all of the rapid fire information that we are hit with.

MGS2 has a metatextual narrative about the nature of sequels and audience expectations. Many of the events happening within the story are intimately playing upon our familiarity with the series, recreating circumstances from both Metal Gear 2 and Metal Gear Solid. Part of the critique is that players are looking to simply recreate the experience of the first game and the narrative goes out of its way to punish Raiden (and thusly the player) for trying to "be" Solid Snake. Much of the game has been mired in failure and any wins we have received are either negated in a cutscene following our gameplay victory or are displayed as being ineffective next to Solid Snake who is forever being displayed as the better protagonist.

So when Raiden wakes up in a torture chamber directly designed to look just like the Shadow Moses Island torture chamber from Metal Gear Solid 1 (and both dialogue and graphics of that cutscene are displayed briefly) we, the player instantly assume familiarity with the concept. To drive that point home the player is forced to survive a button tapping mini-game which is sprung upon us out of nowhere (there is no tutorial. The game expects your familiarity with the concept and thusly does not need to explain it - as a side note it is impossible to die in this minigame, so a lack of familiarity does not impact gameplay, only narrative experience)

All while the only surviving villain from the first game directly says in dialogue "We're also inside the memory of Shadow Moses"

The cutscene also has Raiden face to face with the main villain who recognizes Raiden as a child soldier he helped raise to fight in an African conflict. For the first time we are able to view Raiden, view Jack as his own man outside of his similarities to Solid Snake. We find out he is a child soldier with an impressive kill record who was raised with other child soldiers, drugged and forced to kill in a conflict that he had no personal connections to. He claims "I was given a gun and told to shoot, if I refused then I was the one who would be shot."

Throughout the game, Raiden has been getting phone calls from his girlfriend, Rose, who serves as the mission analyst. When the villain, Solidus, reveals Jack's history she calls him to ask more about this and Jack at first pushes away the memories, claiming that "they" wiped his memories and that he experiences nightmares only to give a vivid and emotionally description of his experiences as young as 6 years old killing for no reason other than he was told to.

Rose attempts to comfort him, to say that she wants to share the burden of his past, Raiden refuses, blocking everything out and pushing Rose away, claiming that he cannot afford to start a family.

Children are a huge emotional trigger for Raiden. This is displayed heavily in the future games of the series.

Overall this is an extreme example of a backstory that would give an adult severe PTSD and forced to confront his past, Raiden is emotionally primed to have a complete dissociative break from reality.

But presently I am not writing about how Raiden experiences derealization. I'm writing about how the player experiences it.

We know that Raiden has been trained in virtual reality to prepare him for this mission. When we see cutscenes describing this we are shown footage of the previous Metal Gear games, particularly the virtual reality training missions from the PS1 game.

The implication is very much that Raiden has played the same games that we ourselves have. The Metal Gear Franchise has an interesting meta-narrative going on that displays games are released in order of declassification with an early conversation in MGS4 mentioning that the events of MGS3 (which takes place in 1964) were declassified recently in the game's present of 2014.

Raiden has played the Metal Gear games. We have played the Metal Gear games.

And the game itself is overtly recycling moments from earlier entries of the series and trying to highlight this fact.

Right after we put a virus into the AI.

Things got really weird from the moment we insert the disc to infect the system.

Escaping from the torture chamber our character is completely naked and runs to the next area. We are given a loading screen.

Ominous music plays and we receive a phone call from Campbell, the mission control from both this game and the previous Metal Gear games. He speaks with a distorted voice. He stutters, telling you that you must proceed with your m-mission. He notes that in your current condition you will not be able to attack or "enter the hanging mode"

He continuously spouts the mission objective and says your role is to take out the terrorists. Raiden demands to know why he keeps saying "role" and Campbell replies

Raiden then notes that he has never met Campbell in person. He has only spoken to him over long distance communication.

Should you return to the torture room the title card will be switched with the name of Japanese rail stations. If you pause the game you are treated to a "map" of Arsenal Gear:

The image is from Glauben, Wissen und Kunst der alten Hindus

All while Campbell calls you every few steps to order you to turn the game console off, recycle further lines from previous Metal Gear games (as well as show footage from them) and your radar is replaced with voyeuristic footage of a young woman sunbathing.

The enemies are now wearing thick armor with no humanizing characteristics and they fly about with inhuman power while wielding katana that can block machine-gun fire.

The floor has scrolling text floating across the surfaces something that the series uses for the VR stages to signify you are in a training stage.

The game is pulling out all of the stops to make sure you are confronted with the reality that you are playing a video game while the character within the video game is experiencing the same information.

He meets up with Snake who reveals he has the unlimited ammo bandana from completing MGS1, all but confirming this is a video game. Much of the information in this segment can be justified in-game. I literally cannot sidestep the fact that a flesh and blood man pointed at a piece of headgear and said "Unlimited ammo". I almost wanted to skip over it as it's devastating to my point about how the game tries to pull you and Raiden out of reality.

See to Raiden, he can no longer be certain if any of this is happening or not because of his experiences with VR. With everything collapsing around him, it feels reasonable to assume that the AI Virus is breaking down the universe around him. With full knowledge of the plot, we the audience can know that everything is happening and the virus has infected his augmented reality elements that make up the in-game HUD. But Raiden doesn't know that and the player on first playthrough cannot fully know it either.

It's almost reasonable to assume that the entire game is taking place within a VR Simulation.

Virtual Reality has long been studied as having links to DPDR with a number of scientific studies examining the link.

The connection is very much there though typically VR only influences a mild sensation of derealization when playing, though to those prone to dissociation they may experience more rapid and powerful effects with prolonged exposure.

Raiden tells Snake what is happening and how his grip on reality is falling apart, going as far to doubt whether his girlfriend, Rose, was ever real either. Snake has no idea how to verify for Raiden that the things that are happening are real and tells him to just keep moving forward and figure it out. He also provides Raiden with a sword.

In the metatext, this is a symbol for Raiden gaining his own unique playstyle. As long as he is emulating Solid Snake he cannot succeed but when he accepts himself as his own person and embraces his unique gameplay mechanic he is able to break free from the narrative and actualize as his own person.

In the sense of the derealization episode, it gives Raiden an opportunity to mow down the wave after wave of "Tengu Soldiers" who come after him and Snake.

Metal Gear is a franchise that doesn't like it when you kill people. Here it has handed you a sword and told you to go to town with an unlimited supply of anime ninjas. The game lightly insisting "it's a video game, it makes no difference how many people you kill" and to flaw the game's philosophy for a moment, the only penalty is a ranking when you beat the game. MGS3 is the one that actually hits you with consequences for in-game murder.

As Raiden stands on a platform with Snake the game continues to devolve and a custom Mission Failed screen appears, mimicking the standard game over.

Gameplay continues inside the small box that typically displays where you died, you can die on this screen.

You then fight 25 copies of the giant mech in a recreation of the photo area from the Metal Gear VR Missions and the world's most convoluted plot reaches its crescendo point with every character betraying everyone else before Raiden has to kill a cybernetic US politician with a sword for the first but not last time.

The sequence takes about forty-five minutes to an hour thirty depending on your play style. The plot is too much and has a layer of metatext on top of it regarding the nature of audience expectations and sequels along with a haunting premonition of what the internet would become.

There are a lot of reasons to praise and a lot of reasons to hate the ending of MGS2. Personally I adore it. But one thing that truly cannot be stated enough, especially back in 2001, is how the game intended to make the player feel during that final section.

It's not enough that Raiden was having a complete dissociative episode, losing grip on his reality, it's that the game was designed to make the player go through those emotions at the same time as the character.

I was going through a really rough patch at the time. It was a few months before I was kicked out, my ties with my mother had been cut off, my dad was in a ward and suffice to say where my head was at the time? The immersive dissociative experience this game offered worked like a charm. Though external factors had a lot of influence.

DPDR is weird in the sense that everyone dissociates. It's a natural and normal thing, but disorders that are born from an excessive amount of disconnect between the self and reality tend not to be relatable experiences. Displaying a character losing their grip on reality is not an easy thing to do.

When we see someone say "I don't know what's real any more" in a piece of media we have empathy for their situation but it's not easy to have the audience in the same mindset as them.

Another hauntingly good example is Perfect Blue which I will likely not discuss in detail in this essay series because the content is a little too dark and the depiction of Dissociative Identity Disorder is not flattering in the slightest.

But the movie does depict an actress whose reality is blurring in with fiction by having a series of interactions happen one after another and revealing that the entire scene was part of a television shoot, with every subsequent scene piling on the confusion between what is happening on camera and off camera.

I can think of other examples of characters experiencing derealization episodes. Some even have fairly good depictions of how someone can be driven to that point, such as the slowburn of Bojack Horseman Season 5 where a number of circumstances pile on until the title character has an episode. The problem is... every single depiction that is coming to mind right now ends in either stigmatizing depictions or violent outcomes.

Heck, even Mae and Raiden up there had violence attached to their dissociation.

If there's one thing I want to make clear as I go through these essays, it's that those who have mental illnesses featuring dissociation are usually trauma survivors and are far more likely to be the victim of violence than the perpetrators of it.

I'm happy with the two examples of derealization I've written about today, NitW for the realistic depiction of the origins and impact and MGS2 for taking the player along for the ride; but I'd still love to see an example where a break from reality did not end with blood.

Please send me an Ask if you can recommend any.

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So... that about brings it to a close for my little ramble on DPDR. I've a few other entries in the essay series on the back-burner. Next will likely be a breakdown on how Umineko handles recontextualizing memories. I've gotten a few paragraphs of that drafted out already.

These essays are really a bit of self-indulgence for me, though so they happen when they happen.

Thank you for reading.