infinity war team up could NEVER beat the samskids reunion
5 notes
·
View notes
(elementary dear watson voice) Blitz, Dear Reader.
20. Dear Reader — If your life was a book what would its title be?
BLITZ: Hmmm.
VETO: "My Life As A Teenage Murder Butler."
BLITZ: No.
VETO: "I'm Gonna Fuck A Game Show Host, Just Wait."
BLITZ: No.
VETO: "My Great Fun Time With My Cool And Sexy Roommate."
BLITZ: You're welcome to keep that one yourself.
NICKLE: "Stealing Someone Else's Jello Out Of The Fridge, a true crime story"!
BLITZ: I get a lot of flak for someone who buys ninety nine percent of the food we have in there.
NICKLE: That's exactly why you can't just steal the one percent that's mine!!
BLITZ: Any other suggestions?
VETO: Man, I dunno.
NICKLE: Casey, what do you think?
[Casey, on the couch, wordlessly displays a hologram of the board game Clue.]
NICKLE: Hahahahaha!! Oh my god, that's perfect!
VETO: They'll let you name a book anything these days.
BLITZ: It sounds like we have a winner.
5 notes
·
View notes
You guys rlly don't realise how much knowledge is still not committed to the internet. I find books all the time with stuff that is impossible to find through a search engine- most people do not put their magnum opus research online for free and the more niche a skill is the less likely you are to have people who will leak those books online. (Nevermind all the books written prior to the internet that have knowledge that is not considered "relevant" enough to digitise).
Whenever people say that we r growing up with all the world's knowledge at our fingertips...it's not necessarily true. Is the amount of knowledge online potentially infinite? Yes. Is it all knowledge? No. You will be surprised at the niche things you can discover at a local archive or library.
79K notes
·
View notes
Everyone's all "i'll fuck your dad" until they realize that means they'd have to fuck someone over 40. and those people are weak.
8K notes
·
View notes
NU UH
Jack Fenton, dialed his younger sister's phone number as he gazed apologetically at the family of bats, that was hanging around in his living room. he impatiently waited for the other party to pick up.
The Bat family remained stoic as they observed the man, they had or Batman had ordered to put the call on speaker, if ever the phone was answered, Robin had stared at the doorway leading to the kitchen there stood Jack's supposed oldest daughter Jazz. who only stared amused at her father's antics much to Robin's confusion.
finally after a grueling 10 seconds wait, the call was finally answered.
Robin held his breath awaiting for the voice he was expecting for.
"Yes, Ahki?" Talia's voice resonated, from the phone. making everyone's eyes except the Fenton family widen.
'what? mother never told me she had a brother.' Damian thought as he took a peek at his father's face who was scrunched up in confusion. same for the rest of his family.
"Talia, my dear ukht, I've heard from a few birds and bats that you have taken my son. on his fieldtrip." Jack said, his nervous and outgoing personality vanishing and what took place was a serious and angry tone of a father as soon as heard the caller's voice, making everyone in the room shudder at the sudden cold atmosphere while the oldest daughter remained composed and unbothered as she watched.
Silence came from the other side of the phone, before answering "It seems i have." Talia answered back, you can here the voice of a boy in the background asking if it was his dad.
"Stop with this false innocence of yours, bring my son back immediately, partly alive and safe." Jack stated, much to the Bats and birds confusion.
Silence once again, as the phone remained quiet seemingly put down on a table with a few whispers and shuffling. before it was picked up once again.
"Nu uh." was the only thing Talia said as she hang up.
everyone paused.
"The fuck you mean 'Nu uh'?!" Jack yelled, at his phone. While his wife walked their daughter's side who was laughing her ass off, confused she looked at the bats then at her husband and then just sighed.
"Dinner's Ready." she only said as she retreated back at to the kitchen.
4K notes
·
View notes
reblog for sample size etc.
21K notes
·
View notes
the BEST new pokémon in gen 9 btw are these two sanrio reject ass mice that count as one pokemon together
but they they silently evolve from level 25+ into the exact same two mice but now they have 1 or 2 kids with them. literally you open your party to discover that these two mice FUCKED in their pokeball and have now sprung their kid(s) on you
55K notes
·
View notes
Will you receive food as a guest in someones house?
by mapsinthefeed
4K notes
·
View notes