#the logical part of my brain tells me to expect this

[tristanrambles]

Me through clenched teeth with a white-knuckled grip on my pen: My Art has Value, the Only One who has to Like it is Me, My Art has Value---

[reidrum]

close to home | s.r

pairing: spencer reid x reader

a/n: this has been rotting in my brain for days now i hope you enjoy the angsty comfort this brought me <3 my requests are open (guidelines in pinned!) or if you wanna just chat hop in my ask box :) gonna hopefully work on a smut fic in the next week so keep an eye out hehe

cw: angst, hurt/comfort, protective!spencer, afab!reader who uses she/her pronouns, non bau!reader, cm type violence, reader sustains injuries from unsub, vague description of injuries, maeve mentions, derek being a good friend, spencer being so in love with reader, this takes place probably a year after maeve, inconsistencies with tls and characters but who cares

wc: 2.4k

summary: the bau is working a local case when their unsub strikes again mid investigation, hotch tells reid and morgan to go check it out but spencer finds the address of the crime to be a little too familar

_______________________________________________

whenever the bau has a case based in the dc area, it’s always a little easier on the team. familiar stomping grounds, ease of resources, no major time difference, and everyone can sleep in their own beds. the hard part about home cases is knowing there’s a serial killer in the place they know deeply, with people they cared about deeply.

spencer and callahan are in the middle of the bullpen staring at the giant white board with all the evidence they have so far. the unsub has been killing women in their mid 20s in the local dc area, with the mo currently unknown. there had already been two victims, both killed in their homes. spencer was currently trying to analyze all the information the case had alongside with what garcia was able to provide, and he was still hitting a dead end. morgan had joined them at some point too, trying to offer what he could remember from the crime scenes but to no avail. he felt his eyes straining and dropping so he decided to get more coffee, but was stopped by hotch and garcia entering the bullpen.

“police just got a 911 call about a break in, but there’s a witness this time. she was home when it happened and it looks like he didn’t expect that and tried to knock her out before escaping. i think it sounds like our unsub. morgan and reid i need you to go check out the scene and interview the witness, see what she remembers.” hotch explained.

morgan and reid nodded as garcia spoke up, “i just sent the address to your phones, it’s a house on hillcrest so it's not that far from here.”

spencer froze. he had to have heard wrong, she did not say hillcrest, “did you say hillcrest?”

“yeah hillcrest drive. it’s like, a 15 minute drive it’s not that bad.”

he felt his heart drop to his feet, a sinking feeling building in his gut. that was the street you lived on. he tried to ground himself with logic, the probability of it being your house is only 10%, but he was dreading asking the fated question.

“garcia, what’s the house number?”

“reid, i already sent it to your pho-“

“garcia, what is the house number,” he spoke again. 

please don’t say 1159 please don’t say 1159 please don’t say-

“1159.”

fuck. the color drained from his face, and the nausea was building to a head quickly. spencer hurriedly tried to think through the last time he spoke to you, last night? this morning? he doesn’t check on you as much as he does when he’s not on a case, but oh my god why can’t he remember the last time he saw you.

“reid,” hotch bellows, finally breaking spencer out of his trance, “what is it? what do you know?”

he shook his head,  “nothing. morgan, let’s go.” he grabbed his jacket and booked it out the door.

morgan, garcia, and hotch all looked at each other in concern, before morgan spoke up, “i’ll see what’s up.” the latter two nodded softly, though the worry didn’t let up in their eyes.

morgan walked up to the car to find spencer repeatedly trying to call someone on the phone, clearly unable to get through and getting really frustrated.

spencer was alerted by morgan’s presence hearing the car unlock but he didn’t even look at him, just immediately got in the car and strapped his seat belt. morgan joined him in the drivers seat giving him a wary look before turning the car on and pulling out of the bureau.

“okay reid, spill it. it’s obvious you know who lives here.” morgan speaks up.

“just drive, please.”

“because if you know something, something that could help the case, it would be helpful if we knew.”

“morgan, just drive.” he borderline yells.

he raises his eyebrows at his raised voice, “listen kid, i’m just trying to help you. i can see you’re upset but we’re on the same side, you know that.”

spencer takes a shaky breath, feeling another shade of guilt at yelling at one of his friends, for something he didn’t even know about. he’d kept you a secret for many reasons— your relationship with him was still new, and he just wanted to keep you to himself for a bit. after what happened with maeve, he felt especially more responsible at keeping you safe and making sure you didn’t get tangled up in his line of work.

some job he did of that.

the one thing he regrets about how he handled the maeve situation, was not asking for help until it was almost too late. for not doing anything about her stalker when he was part of one of the most famous fbi teams built to find people like that. he’d always live with that guilt, but he vowed not to do that with you.

he loved you so much. you were so kind, and smart, and beautiful. a breath of fresh air after feeling lost in a dark tunnel for so long. you were so understanding when he explained what he did for a living, and what had happened to him and people he cared about as a result. he still remembers what you said to him when he told you that you could have an out, if you wanted.

“any risk is worth taking if getting to be with you is the consolation prize.”

tears welled up in eyes thinking about the memory. if you were willing to take any risk, then he should be able to as well.

he cleared his throat, and morgan’s ears perked up, “my uh, my girlfriend lives there. where the unsub, at- attacked.” he voiced softly.

morgan looked at him for a beat while driving, spencer missing the way his face dropped. he tightened his hands on the wheels, and didn’t hesitate to turn the lights and siren on and shift gears to speed up.

__

the car pulled onto your street and the first thing spencer sees is the flashing light of the ambulances. morgan doesn’t even put the car in park before spencer’s bolting out hoping he can find you quickly.

he’s asking all the paramedics he’s passing if they’ve seen you or know if you’re being treated, were you transferred to a hospital and he didn’t know, the tunnel vision slowly overtaking him until he hears a voice breaking through like sunlight call out his name.

he whips his head in the direction he heard it come from, and he’s never been more grateful to be met with the beautiful sight of you. you watch his eyes widen and let out a sigh before running over to where you were sitting in the back of the ambulance. he’s definitely not thinking when he goes in to hug you, not even knowing the extent of your injuries. he’s overtaken by the desperate need to hold you in his arms so he knows you’re safe and okay.

“hi,” you choke out muffled, “funny seeing you here.”

he pulls back to inspect your face, taking note of a small cut above your left eyebrow and the beginning splotches of a bruise forming on your lower jaw. his heart aches so much looking at you, knowing what happened to you and who did this to you.

“hi, honey,” he lets out tearfully, “are you okay? i mean, of course you’re not. but what did the paramedics say? did they give you anything? are you sure they checked all your injuries? you know what, let me go call the guy over. i’ll be literally two seconds.” his panicked ramble fading off as he rounds the truck you’re sat in to find the emt.

upon his extensive questioning of the man who treated you, he found out that you had sustained a minor concussion from when the unsub swung at you with an umbrella, superficial cuts caused by a broken vase you threw to defend yourself, and a dislocated shoulder from getting shoved into the wall.

you were okay, but at what cost.

the emt leaves you two and spencer sits himself next to you on the rig. he wraps an arm around your waist and pulls you as tight as he can and the other hand cradles your head into the crook of his neck, holding you so tight he’s hoping he can squeeze the bad memories out of you. it’s at this moment of feeling safe and sound in his arms when the adrenaline of your attack wears off.

spencer hears a small whimper and feels a few hot tears trickle down his neck, your breathing gets faster as you’re attempting to beat your body’s fear response. the slow build up of sobs starting to rack your chest, and he immediately holds you tighter.

“it’s over, baby, they won’t hurt you anymore. i promise.”

you sniffle, “i know, i just can’t believe this happened. to me, to us. it’s not fair to you.” trailing off the last two words.

“to me? wh- what do you mean?”

you take a deep breath, “i don’t mean to bring it up again, i just know how eerily similar this is to a past experience you’ve had. and i hoped that i wouldn’t be in a position to make you feel that way again. i don’t know why this happened, i'm sorry.”

he looked down at you incredulously. genuinely unable to believe that you were sitting next to him on an ambulance, beaten up with bruises and scars after a home invasion attack, worried about how he would feel when he got to you. it was enough to finally let the swell of tears saved up in his eyes fall.

“oh sweetheart,” he chokes out, realizing you’ve been trying to be brave for him this whole time, “what happened is not your fault, do you understand me? my job is to always worry about you and your safety. when garcia said the address i…i couldn’t even process it, i don’t even know how i got to the car,” he shook his head, “but i am the last person you need to push your emotions down for. i will always take them in stride and love you even more for that, okay?”

“okay,” you take a shaky breath, “i love you.”

“i love you.” he leans down to press a kiss to the crown of your head.

both of your heads look up at an approaching figure, who you quickly recognize to be ssa derek morgan. you knew spencer hadn’t told the team about you yet, so you tried to sit up independently as fast as you could before he came over and suspected something.

spencer’s grip didn’t let up when he bent down and whispered, “it’s okay, he knows.” you look up at him with wide eyes when derek finally reaches you.

“reid, i already talked to the detectives and we’re good to go when you’re ready,” he turns his body to you and gives you a comforting smile, “hi sweetheart, i’m derek morgan, it’s nice to meet you.”

spencer rolls his eyes at the nickname while you giggle softly, “hi derek, i’ve heard so much about you. it's nice to finally meet you too.”

“i wish it were under better circumstances,” he sighs, “listen, i know it’s all still really fresh for you, but it might help the case if you’re able to come in for a cognitive interview, or even talk to a sketch artist.”

spencer doesn’t miss a beat before protesting, “absolutely not. we can do it later, it’s fine.”

“reid-“

you look up at him placing your hand on his chest, “spence, it’s okay. i want to help, please.”

he rests his hand on top yours and gives it a light squeeze, “okay, but i’m not leaving you alone for a second.”

“i didn’t think you would.” you smile.

“alright lovebirds, you can have your private time later, we should go now.” derek teases.

spencer groans, “see this is why i didn’t say anything.”

“you think i’m bad? wait till penelope meets her.”

__

the three of you pile into the car before starting the drive to spencer’s apartment so he could get you a change of clothes and other things you might need. you end up falling asleep in the back seat, the final stage of your shock sinking in like a rock. spencer checks on you from the rear view mirror and sees you passed out, and smiles.

“she’s cute,” derek starts, “can i ask how long?”

“nine months.” he replies, fishing for something out of his pocket.

“pretty boy hid a girl from all of us for nine months? maybe we’re not as good profilers as we thought.”

“imagine that,” he laughs, and gestures to the item in his hand, “look.”

spencer’s holding out a well loved photo booth strip with three pictures, of you and spencer from the time you went to a local county fair. you’re sitting in his lap, mostly due to the cramped space and the expansive limbs. the first picture is the two of you holding up finger guns attempting to be as back to back as you can. the second picture, you intended it to be a normal one where you both smile at the camera, but spencer couldn’t take his eyes off you and the picture captured the love struck gaze he had on you. the last one you were about to tell him the idea for it, when he grabbed your face and pulled you closer to kiss you, neither of you knowing when the final picture snapped.

the edges were worn out and frayed, clearly broken down by the oils on his fingers from pulling it out frequently. it was his most treasured item, a constant reminder of what was always waiting for him when he got back from grueling cases, and how lucky he was to have you in his life.

“you look really happy, kid.” derek says, thinking about the many times he’s seen his friend at rock bottom, the things that have been so brutally taken from him, and the suffering he’s had at the hands of his job. his heart warms for his friend, who seemed to finally catch a break.

“i am.”

[rafeandonlyrafe]

kinktober: innocence/corruption

words: 3.8k

warnings: 18+ only!, smut, virgin reader, unprotected sex, m and f receiving oral and handjob, daddy kink, lots of pet names including kitten/good girl/princess/baby, corruption kink from rafe but hes still very sweet, one instance of pussy slapping lol, mild degradation, use of slut

taglist: @drewstarkeysbae @thelomlisrafecameron @f4ll-for-you @dilvcv @slut4drudy @drewsbabygirll @jjmaybankswifes-blog @rafescokenostril @jjsmarijuana

“i bet you’re so wet right now.” rafe whispers, sending a shiver down your spine.

“i’m not.” you pout, not even fully understanding what he’s saying, mind still fuzzy from the intense kiss he just gave you.

“liar.” rafe smirks, hands still placed on your waist from when he pulled you onto his lap and flush against his body.

“i’m not a liar!” you shake your head, eyebrows furrowing as rafe just lets out a chuckle.

“you are.” rafe says, leaning forward and pressing a quick kiss against your lips, and even though it only lasts seconds, your head begins to feel dizzy again and you lean forward, seeking out more.

“little slut.” rafe whispers as your forehead presses against his shoulder, unable to keep your eyes on his as your chest presses into his. “i can feel your nipples getting hard.” you sit up suddenly, feeling your face get hot as your cheeks blush. you over your breasts with your hands. “they are not.” “move your hands then.” rafe commands, but you press them harder against your chest, willing your nipples to settle down, but when rafe reaches up and rips your hands away, you know he can easily see the hard buds poking out from under the fabric of your shirt.

“i knew it. liar.” rafe cups your breasts, keeping his hands to the outside of them, manipulating them beneath your shirt as the toys with how they sit on your chest.

you should tell him to stop, but you can’t get the words out. rafes thumb suddenly swipes over your nipple and you jump up off his lap.

“now you’re definitely wet.” rafe says, eyes on your pussy that is now level with his face.

“no, i’m not!” you say again, even as you feel something unfamiliar stirring in your stomach. “you’re being a bad boyfriend right now!”

“the only thing that would make me a bad boyfriend, sweetheart, is if i didn’t take care of my girls pussy when it got wet for me.”

“it’s not wet!” you whine, cutting rafe off before he can say something, “and don’t call me a liar again!” rafe closes his mouth in a hum, eyes coming to meet your face. “then show me.” “what?” you question, glancing down your body.

“if you’re not wet, show me your pussy. let me see.” rafe is staring up at you expectantly, and the flame burning inside of you speaks before the logical part of your brain can. 

you humph and pull your shorts down your legs, leaving you bare. rafes eyes widen, expecting a second layer underneath.

“open up, kitten.” rafe taps your thigh, and you spread your tightly clenched thighs just slightly, revealing a mess of sticky wetness. rafe smiles up at you, and you want to cry out of shame and embarrassment, but mostly for lying to your boyfriend about not being sopping wet.

“there. you’ve seen. i’m a liar, now let me put my shorts back o- ahhh!” you let out a scream as rafes hands land on your hips, pulling you closer to the couch he’s sat at as his lips attack to your clit, forcing his head between your legs as they part so you don’t lose your balance. 

“rafe!” you scream, reaching over him and holding onto the back of the couch as he tongue pokes out of his mouth, licking up the wetness you claimed wasn’t there.

you let out a series of moans as he focuses directly on your clit, bringing you a type of pleasure you’ve never felt before. you know in that moment that there’s no going back, no going back to the innocence you once possessed as you reach a hand to the back of his head, pressing his face further into your cunt.

“admit it.” rafe mumbles against your pussy, only pulling away slightly to speak, letting you feel the vibrations of his voice. “admit that me kissing you made you this wet.” “f-fine.” you cry out as his lips wrap around your clit, giving it a suck that makes you see stars. “fine! yes! you got me all wet.”

“you lied.” rafe pulls away fully, and you try to push his head back between your legs, but he won’t let you. “you lied to your boyfriend. i thought you said we would always tell each other the truth.”

you didn’t trust rafe when he first asked you out. you were new to the outer banks and came from a very sheltered life, so when you finally agreed to be his girlfriend, you made sure some rules were put into place. you didn’t even think to include anything about sex, you’ve never experienced it before.

“i’m sorry.” you pout, the shame about the lie now mixing in with how dirty you feel.

“i’ll forgive you, baby.” rafe tugs you down onto his lap, depositing you on his knee so you’re now face to face. “i’ll forgive you if you’re very good for me tonight and do everything i say.” “okay.” you whisper, not wanting rafe to be mad at you. you blink back the tears that have welled up in your eyes, you cunt clenching around nothing as you wish for his mouth back on you again, back delivering the world-changing pleasure.

“good kitten.” rafe says, cupping your cheek and bringing you in for a soft kiss, but you don’t want soft now that he’s shown you so much more. you deepen the kiss, opening your mouth slightly for rafes tongue, granting him permission as your own tongue tangles with his.

you lean forward to get a better angle, but also end up pressing your cunt into his thigh. you moan into his mouth, rocking forward against his jeans, no doubt leaving a large wet spot as you continue to move.

you don’t even realize that rafe has stopped kissing you, sitting back to watch you get yourself off on his leg. you place your hands on his chest, pushing your clit directly into the muscle.

rafe gives his leg a sudden bounce, making your legs widen. you cry out, eyes closing as you grind down.

rafes hands land on your hips, and you hope he’s going to help, but instead he forces you to stop, shifting you so you’re not lined up anymore. “no, rafe, stop-” you whine, opening your eyes to see his stern expression greeting yours.

“dirty sluts get themselves off like this. i thought you were my good kitten, not a dirty slut.” rafe says, making you almost cower at the harshness in his tone.

“i am good.” you pout, sticking out your bottom lip, and rafe can’t hold back the urge to lean forward and bite it, tugging you back into a ravishing kiss, only pulling away when you’re both out of breath.

“good girls also don’t lose their virginity on a couch. let me take you up to bed, princess.” you just nod, standing up off rafes lap, who only lets you stand for a moment until he’s up, sweeping you into his arms.

“wh-what do good girls do when losing their virginity?” you whisper as he climbs the stairs, feeling your face redden again.

“good girls do as their boyfriends say. and you’re gonna do so good honey, no reason to be nervous.” rafe kisses your cheek as he sets you down on his lush bed, closing the door behind him, hoping that will make you feel a bit more comfortable despite being completely alone in the house.

rafe stands next to the bed as he tips your head up, giving you a sweet kiss that has your nerves fluttering away. he smiles down at you, a wickedness shining through, not able to be fully concealed. 

“can you…” you mumble, and then stop, remembering that you’re supposed to listen to your boyfriend, not tell him to do things.

“it’s okay, baby, ask.” rafe asks, giving you the permission you needed to speak.

“can you take your shirt off?” you ask, surprised at your ability to keep eye contact while asking, remembering the time you went out on his boat and rafe took his shirt off, and you were unable to take your eyes off of him.

rafe doesn’t respond with words, instead pulling the tshirt off over his head and tossing it away. he takes your hand in his, placing it on his bare chest, giving you permission to touch.

you glide your hand over his smooth skin, admiring the way his muscles stand out. you move lower, eyes following your fingertips as you feel his abs, moving lower and lower until you get to the hem of his sweatpants. 

you let out a gasp when your eyes finally meet what’s right in front of your face. rafe is straining so hard through his sweatpants that you know it must be painful, the way he’s pushing against the fabric.

“what do… good girls do with this?” you ask, hoping rafe knows what you’re referring to.

“they touch it.” rafe says, taking your hand again and lowering it over his crotch, pressing your palm against his hardness, making him let out a grunt.

“that feels good?” you ask as you begin to rub your hand over it. 

“baby, it feels amazing.” rafe steps back, and you frown, going to ask him if he’s lying about it feeling good if he’s making you stop, but then he grabs his sweatpants and lowers them down, taking his underwear with him.

your eyes widen at the sight in front of you, a primal urge taking over as you reach back out, wrapping your fingers around his thick length. you’ve never seen a cock up close, and definitely not one as beautiful as the one your boyfriend possesses.

“fuck, your hands on me are heaven.” rafe moans, and you feel a flutter in your heart at the praise, beginning to stroke your hand up and down over his shaft, eyes occasionally traveling up to his face to make sure he’s still enjoying your movements.

you try different things, try faster, try slower, you even take your palm and rub it against the end of his cock, making rafe suddenly thrust forward with a moan. you can tell he likes it, but his reaction scares you slightly, so you keep to stroking his length.

“you want to know what else good kittens do?” rafe asks. he smiles when you quickly nod.

“they lick it.” he says, taking a step closer so he’s between your legs, not failing to notice the way your wetness has grown to leave a mark on his bed, but you’re so focused on him that you’ve forgotten the ache in your pussy.

“oh.” you say, leaning forward and taking an experimental lick of the head of his cock. you look up at rafe, swallowing the slightly salty taste that’s left on your tongue. 

“come on.” rafe encourages you, and you lean forward, licking again, relishing in the taste as you continue, covering the head of his cock with spit as you get into the feeling.

once you’re used to it, you begin to move your hand again, stroking it from base right up to his head where you continue exploring with your tongue.

“try sucking.” rafe says, and you only hesitate for a moment before opening your mouth, placing the head of his cock against your tongue. you close your lips over it, surprised how big it feels inside of your mouth.

you give a gentle suck before looking up, not wanting to hurt rafe. “harder.” he commands, and you close your eyes, focusing again as you give him a harsher suck. the moan rafe lets out spurs you to continue, caressing his cock with your tongue inside of your mouth as you continue to suck.

your hand, that was holding him steady at the base, begins to move again, and you develop a rhythm of sucking and stroking him when suddenly rafe pulls away, chest heaving as you swallow the remnants of his taste on your tongue.

“did i mess up?” you ask, making rafe let out a breathy laugh.

“no, baby, not at all. i just almost came.” he explains, reaching to run a hand through your hair.

“oh!” you say, eyes widening. you almost made him orgasm. you knew that was the end goal, but you never realized how good you were doing. you feel a bit of pride grow in your chest at that.

“you know, we can keep practicing until you eventually can suck all of me.” you glance down to his cock, eyes widening, wondering how you’re supposed to fit all of him inside of your mouth. 

“don’t worry now, darling.” rafe ducks and gives your forehead a kiss. “we will work up to it. for now, why don’t you take your shirt off then lay on the bed?” you had forgotten completely about your own pleasure, but at the reminder you realize how hard your nipples have grown, and how the need to have him back between your thighs has only gotten bigger as you sucked him off. 

you shuck your shirt off, no longer feeling as insecure now that rafe is naked. you scooch further up on the bed until you’re able to lay down on the pillows, watching as rafe paces at the end of the bed, eyes never leaving your body as he admires you, admires you like a predator does their prey before taking them down.

“spread your legs.” rafe commands, and you follow his instructions instantly, bearing your pussy to him.

rafe gets onto the bed, kneeling between your thighs. he runs his hands over your legs, trying to control himself, but the need to hear your moans again is too great.

he presses his thumb to your clit, easily rubbing over it due to your slickness. your back arches up off the bed, letting out a cry.

“good kitten, shh.” rafe says, bring his thumb up and sticks it in his mouth, tasting your wetness before quickly reconnecting. “i’m gonna touch you somewhere new.”

you barely register his words, too focused on the way your clit is pulsing with pleasure. your eyes that you hadn’t even realized had slid closed shoot open when the tip of rafes finger presses against your hole.

“rafe!” you squeal. you’ve never had anyone touch you there before.

“remember what i said about good kittens?” he reminds you. you take a deep breath, letting your body relax. you trust your boyfriend, and you need to make up for lying to him earlier. 

“good girl.” rafe presses his finger harder, until it breaks the seal of your hole. he could moan just from the first knuckle being inserted, knowing you’re going to squeeze his cock so tight.

his finger keeps pushing in, and you feel like it’s impossibly long. it’s uncomfortable for a moment, but his thumb continues to move over your clit, and the discomfort changes to pure elation as you feel a high rising over your body.

“stop, rafe, i think i’m gonna pee!” you warn, but his thumb continues to move, and he turns his hand so his finger quirks up, pressing against the spot inside of you that has you tumbling over the edge, entire body arching up as you moan, letting out a slew of words that sound like rafes name mixed with curses, curses that you never let pass your lips but you can’t help it now.

your entire body shakes as you feel wave after wave of pleasure, all from rafes adept hands. he slows his thumb on your clit and eventually stops when it pulses angrily underneath him, but he keeps the singular digit inside of you.

“did i pee?” you ask, afraid to even look down, unsure what just happened.

“no, baby, you just came. you had an orgasm.” rafe explains, placing his freehand on your outer thigh and rubbing it comfortingly.

“that felt…” you don’t know how it’s possible for you to blush anymore, but you do, “that felt really good.”

rafe smiles down at you, “i know honey, and i’m gonna help you feel another one since you’re such a good kitten. and you’re gonna help me cum too.”

“i’m gonna help you feel like that?” you ask, wanting to experience the intense feeling with your boyfriend.

“you are.” he nods. “this is why you’re such a good girl, we are gonna get to do this all the time now. i’ll show you how to orgasm with my cock, and with my tongue.” “i can cum on your tongue?” your eyes widen, remembering the way his soft but skillful tongue felt against you.

“you can.” rafe says, “but first, i need to open your pussy up with my fingers so i can fit my cock inside of you.” “i don’t know if it’s gonna ffffff-” you’re cut off as rafe begins to move his finger again. 

“i’ll fit baby, don’t worry.” rafe says, feeling how good you’ve already opened up for him. your body lays slack against the mattress, and he’s glad that you got to your orgasm so quickly so he can focus on opening you up while you’re relaxed.

he moves until his singular digit pushes easily into you. he looks up to find your eyes closed, taking deep breaths as you attempt to keep your body relaxed, but you do tense up momentarily when a second finger joins in pressing against your entrance.

before you can even freak out, they are both plunging inside of you, moving easier due to your wetness.

“baby girl, you’re making me so proud.” rafe says, and he swears you actually start to glow under his praise. his innocent little girlfriend, somehow managing to remain sweet even as he finger fucks you.

“can you… touch my clit again?” you ask, swallowing thickly.

“no, princess. next time you cum i want it to be on my cock. i’ll touch your clit then.” rafe says, noticing the face you make. “don’t pout or you won’t cum at all.”

you wipe the frown off your face, really wanting to feel what it’s like to orgasm with rafes cock inside you, even if it looks too large.

“i’m gonna scissor my fingers now, kitten.” rafe warns, and you let out a moan as he starts to open up his fingers, pressing them against your walls to make space for himself.

“there you go.” rafe mumbles, eyes on your cunt as you loosen. he can barely stand to wait any longer as he gently pulls his fingers out, sucking them into his mouth to get another taste of you.

“t-time for your cock?” you ask, whispering the last word so quietly that rafe can barely hear you.

“yes, time for my cock. be a good girl and stay relaxed.” rafe considers what position will be best for you before grabbing a pillow that you’re not resting your head against, and moving it to underneath your hips. he moves closer on the bed, rubbing the head of his cock against your pussy.

as soon as he brushes your entrance, you tense up.

“hey.” rafe warns, pulling his hips back as he delivers a swift slap to your pussy, right over your clit that has you crying out. “i said relax.” “sorry.” you whimper, taking a deep breath as rafe lines himself up again. he pushes his hips forward, moaning as the head of his cock is concealed by your tight heat, walls constricting him but he’s able to keep moving as you stay relaxed.

“good girl.” rafe praises you as he sinks in, pausing to move at a snail pace when you squirm or make a noise of discomfort.

eventually, his hips are settled right between your thighs, pressed as deeply as they can go. as much as rafe wants to go feral, he doesn’t want to cause you too much pain, so he lets you have a moment to adjust.

“so big inside me daddy.” you whimper, unsure of where the name came from.

“daddy, huh?” the corner of rafes lip quirks up. “maybe you’re not a good girl after are, maybe you are a dirty slut.” “i’m no-oooo!” you scream as rafe beings to move, his hips pulling away and then slamming back in. your eyes roll back in your head at the feeling of his cock moving against your walls, every inch feeling so sensitive.

“you’re not a dirty slut? because this is exactly how dirty sluts behave when they have their daddies cock inside of them.” rafe moves faster when he feels that you’re only getting wetter.

“i wanna be your good kitten.” you whine, hands grasping at the sheets.

“hmm.” rafe slows down so he can feel every inch of you, using his cock to memorize the way you feel around him. “maybe you’re my good girl and my dirty slut. can you be both for me baby?” “i can, i can.” you whine, feeling tears slide down your face. rafe keeps one hand stabilizing your hip and uses the other to swipe his thumb across your cheeks to collect your tears.

“be my slut and my princess. cum on my cock for me.” rafe wants to last longer, he really does, but now that he knows how dirty you can be when he pushes you, especially the way you reacted to him slapping your pussy, he knows this is by far the last time you let him play with your body.

he speeds up, his cock swelling inside of you as he rubs you clit again, as promised. you moan consistently, unable to control your voice as you get closer and closer to the edge, now able to identify the feeling as it hits you hard.

rafes cock hits your insides just right, and you explode at the same time as him, your cunt squeezing repeatedly in your orgasm, milking all of the cum out of him as he shouts your name, releasing himself as deeply as he can.

you are both breathing heavily when rafe falls forward, pressing his body against yours. you whine at the change of position in his cock as he keeps it lodged deep inside of you.

“was i good?” you whisper, pressing a kiss to his jaw as rafe picks his head up.

“you were so good, princess. such a dirty little whore for me.” rafe kisses you in earnest, delighting in the way your lips slide over each others, even more open to the make out now than you were before you had sex. “gonna be your good little slut from now on.” you whisper against his lips, surprised to feel rafes cock twitch inside of you as he rehardens slightly.

rafe presses a deep kiss to your lips, “i know you will, baby. i’m so proud of you.”

[mrfoox]

'when someone gets mad at me especially girls in the way where they want space/want to be alone... I get all clingy and lovely dovely bc im scared of them leaving me. That's because of my abandonet issues I for from my mom'

Me: hmm... Yeah i.. I might have something akin to that bc of my dad problems

'oh yeah, how?'

Me: uuuh idk

Me in reality when anyone treats me slightly different, ignores me or seem mad/sad/upset with me or for any reason: I'm sorry. It's all my fault, I should be ashamed I'm so sorry please tell me what I can do to atone? -mad anxiety and possibly sobbing-no please I'm sorry, I know I should not have said that before, its that why you're mad, right? I'm sorry please

[thinkinonsense]

ok so i had a thought😏😏 dbf!logan takes ur virginity and from then on u guys hook up whenever u get a chance (all the time). one night he gets done dicking u DOWN and u say u love him and he’s all like “we can’t do this anymore kid” very ANGSTYYY

i love you, i'm sorry- dbf!logan howlett x fem!reader

part two *mdni

"i love you, logan."

four little words that would send your world crumbling before your feet. the older man lifts himself from in between your chest, both of you panting post orgasm. nights like this had become a bad habit for the both of you.

from the moment logan first slipped off your panties in this exact spot a year ago, you had been wanting to tell him how you really felt. you wanted to tell him how you craved his touch when he wasn't around, how you adored the way he took care of you and most importantly, how this didn't feel 'casual' to you anymore.

seconds turned into minutes of silence, desperately waiting for logan to say something; anything.

"lo, are you going to say some-"

"we can't see each other anymore, kid." he says, avoiding eye contact with you as he pulls out.

"what?"

this wasn't real. that's the only sentence that your brain could form as you watch him put his boxers back on. you laid there on his bed, naked, vulnerable, with his cum dripping out of you and he can't even look you in your fucking eyes.

"ya' heard me." logan says, putting a cigar in his mouth and tossing your dress on the bed next to you.

"what happened?" your voice was trembling on the verge of rage and heartbreak.

"i told you a year ago not to bring that 'love shit' in here."

a year ago when he took your virginity. he promised to be gentle and to care for you. guess that didn't extend past sex for him.

you scoff, pulling your sundress over your head. "you didn't say that when you said you love how tight i fit around you or when you said you love how well i know you. was any of that even true?"

logan ignored you as he lit his cigar and waited for you to leave. you stand up and walk over to him, touching his chin and turning to so he's facing you.

"look me in the eyes when you kick me out of your bed." you spit angrily at the man you adored endlessly.

all logan could see was your eyes full of tears and your red puffy lips, trying to keep yourself together. deep down, he knew he deserved all the shit in the world thrown at him for him for breaking your heart. you would never understand why he had to be so cruel but his intentions were never to hurt you like this. it killed him.

"find someone your own age to love, kid." logan says, twisting the knife.

"don't call me kid, logan!" you yell at him. "i'm not a fucking child!"

"then stop acting like one!" his voice boomed back at you, spurring on more tears.

who had he turned into? you couldn't recognize the man in front of you. this wasn't your logan.

"so, you're just going to let me leave like this?" you cry, glaring at him. "give up everything we have all because you're afraid of me loving you?"

you didn't expect an answer, he already shoved your hand away from his face, no longer wanting the image of your broken heart haunting him.

logan wanted to tell you everything, explain why he can't accept your love because it will put you at a greater risks, but logically, logan knows he has to let you go.

"in ten years, when your ass is still sitting drunk on one of my fathers bar stools and he shows you photos of me and a man who can appreciate me for more than sex, a man who can admit he loves me back, you'll remember this moment because this will be the last time you ever fucking see me." you tell him rather calmly as you collect your shoes and purse.

logan watches you do as he asks and leave. if he was a better man, he would have done it differently; but then again, if he was a better man, he never would've fooled around with a twenty-something year old.

the front door slams with a broken sob escaping your lips. from the bedroom, logan could hear your car engine starting and that's when he could allow himself to grieve the life he would've had.

[lilahisntsadanymore]

Blood status seems to become less important when you acknowledge the actual feeling of love. What will Theo do when Y/n comes to the terms with the differences between them being impossible to ignore?

Pairing: Theo Nott x granger!reader

Words count: 1.9k

Author's note: My apologies for keeping you waiting so long, but I finally got some time off at uni!! Wishing you all a good year!!

Kind of a 2nd part of this fic, but you can read it without the previous one

≫ ──── ««•◦ ✪ ◦•»» ──── ≪

Keep you safe

One evening, Theo was waiting in the library. Waiting for a person he never expected to talk to. Y/n Granger. He found himself feeling a bit nervous, even though there was no reason.

Thinking about Y/n made him feel something. A feeling he never felt before. Slughorn said it's love, the muggle kind of love, the purest form, not induced by anything supernatural.

Theo decided to read about it. Hoping to find some book about it, he asked the librarian. She gave him a book specifically about love potions and spells. One of the first chapters was just what Theo was looking for.

"How to tell the difference between love and infatuation caused by magic." He whispered the first sentence to himself.

He started reading, his mind realizing what he got himself into as his gaze brushed over the text. Well, technically it wasn't his own fault and apparently also not the girl's fault.

But there must've been a reason. If love was a part of biology, brain chemistry, there had to be some logical factor.

"What are you reading?"

When Theo heard Y/n's voice right next to him, he immediately closed the book, causing it to make a loud sound.

"You took such a long time I got bored." He replied.

"Don't be so shy," the girl shifted her eyes to the title of the book, "oh, love potions and spells? But we're doing something completely different."

"Really? I couldn't care less, forgot what we were supposed to do." Surely one thing he'd love to do was making out with her on that table.

Y/n put her homework on the table.

"Read it and tell me what's wrong."

"Nothing is wrong, I just-"

"What's wrong with my text, Nott. I didn't ask how you were doing."

"Right."

Theo took the papers and started reading. The text was written with the most beautiful handwriting he's ever seen. So elegant, so precise.

"How long did it take you to write?" He asked.

"One evening. It was easier than you'd think."

"I think it's extremely easy." He bragged. "Anyway, is that all? Or do you wanna add something?"

"Well, Slughorn thought it's necessary for you to help me. Is there anything you think should be added?"

"Uh, no, it looks fine," he mumbled, avoiding eye contact.

"Fine? Theodore Nott, the perfectionist Slytherin, settles for 'fine'? I expected more from you."

"Look, it's not my homework, it's yours. I don't know why I agreed to help you, but it was pointless."

"You got yourself into this, could've said no."

"What the fuck am I even doing?" Theo asked rather himself than the girl. "I don't need to be helping a mudblood, who cares what grade you'll get." With these words, he stood up.

"Because-" Y/n stuttered. "Because... I've heard your conversation with Slughorn. And you said... that you liked me."

"Me? Liking you?" He snorted with laughter. "What the hell, Granger?"

Tears formed in Y/n's eyes as she watched Theo walk away. Sure, he was mean to her before, this wasn't the first time. But this time was somehow different.

Y/n could swear she heard Theo confessing to Slughorn that he's actually in love with her. It's not possible her brain played tricks on her. Plus Hermione said Theo told her about his feelings for Y/n.

≫ ──── ««•◦ ✪ ◦•»» ──── ≪

Harry walked onto the astronomy tower. Y/n was supposed to be back a long time ago. Ron and Hermione also wanted to go there, but Harry asked to let him go alone.

Harry knew where Y/n was thanks to the Map. He felt such relief not seeing Nott's name next to hers. She was standing alone, leaning on the banister. There was something in her hand, Harry couldn't see well in the dark, but from the smell he realized it was a cigarette.

"I didn't know you smoke." He spoke.

Y/n expected this to happen, she was aware of Harry's feelings towards her. She took one last drag from her cigarette then dropped it on the ground, put it out with her shoe and kicked off the tower.

"Why do you keep doing this?" Y/n asked, smoke leaving through her mouth. "I knew you're gonna look at your silly little map to see where I am."

"We were starting to get worried. Theo is... you know, dangerous. We got scared he would hurt you."

And he did. Theo did hurt Y/n, just not physically.

"Hermione should be here instead. But, let me guess, you told her you'll check up on me."

"Maybe," Harry admitted finally, "do you know why? Because I actually care about you. I've had feelings for you for years. I deserve you, not Nott. I deserve you, because-"

"Because you're the chosen one?" She mocked and paused. "Look, Harry, I like you as a friend. I've never felt anything more than this. I can't change how I see you and I won't pretend otherwise."

He nodded, acceptance settling in. "I get it. I just... I thought if I cared enough, it would make a difference."

"Caring is important, Harry, but it doesn't always lead to the feelings we hope for."

"Whoever you date, just don't date Nott, please."

"I promise I won't. Not after today, I'm over him."

"Care to share what happened?"

"I'll tell you, Hermione and Ron in the common room. Let's go, I've been here too long."

≫ ──── ««•◦ ✪ ◦•»» ──── ≪

Y/n didn't even know how wrong she was that night on the astronomy tower, but she forgot about it. Weeks went by, Christmas had passed, everyone were back from the break. Classes started again and Y/n found herself hoping to catch a glimpse of Theo.

They kept exchanging glances on the corridors, accidentally bumping into each other in the crowds. Y/n wanted to believe Theo liked her, but even if he did, they could never work.

"Y/n, listen to me," he said, catching her when she was alone in the library one time. "I know how things have been between us, but during the break I... I realized I don't wanna keep being enemies."

"Theo, you know it could never work. You said what you said and maybe it's better to leave it this way."

"I contemplated a lot," it was true, he spent the break mostly in his room, drowning in thoughts. About her, about them, coming to terms with what he was feeling. "I decided to accept my feelings."

"That's great for you, but we could never work. I've always 'fancied' you, I guess, despite what you were doing, ironically, but the time we worked on my project together, I accepted we could never work."

"And why's that?"

Y/n took a deep breath, wondering if he was stupid or just pretending. Maybe it was a bet he had with someone. Maybe Draco dared him to do this.

"You don't see how different we are? What do you expect is gonna happen? Would you introduce me to your father? Wouldn't you care that I'd get you disowned?"

Theo looked at her, Y/n could see sadness in his eyes. She realized her words made him realize the differences between them, because he walked away. Theo walked away without a word.

Y/n pierced her own heart with an invisible knife. She was really hoping they could work, but it just wasn't possible in this universe. Maybe there was a universe where none of this purity bullshit didn't exist. Y/n wished she would've been born there.

Y/n couldn't predict what Theo was going to do. She thought her words made him give up on her. It was for the best, of course, she should've focused on her studies firstly, and then on a realistic relationship.

It was a Friday. Y/n was sitting next to Ginny by the Gryffindor table. It was dinner time, all the students gathered in the Great Hall. All the students besides one Slytherin, the one that Y/n hoped to see. Maybe it was weird, but she enjoyed the sad looks they'd pass to each other.

"Hey, Y/n, are you listening?" Hermione asked from across the table.

"Sure," Y/n quickly shifted her eyes to her sister. "You were talking about Defence Against the Dark Arts."

"You've got divided attention. Stop looking at the Slytherin table."

"Ugh," Ginny groaned, "were you doing this again? Merlin, you stare at this Slytherin git 90% of the time."

"Well, he isn't here today. I wonder where he could be. Everyone else is here."

"There he is," Ron pointed out, rolling his eyes.

The golden trio and two younger Gryffindors looked at the doors' direction. Theo had just walked into the Great Hall, but surprisingly he didn't walk towards his table. He walked towards Y/n.

"Y/n," he spoke, catching everyone's attention. People were reading to witness another argument. "I can't help this, I love you."

Shocked noises came from all the tables, but Slytherins kept whispering between each other also when Theo continued talking.

"I don't care what anyone says, anyone thinks. Love is not meant to be controlled, it kills me to fight it."

Y/n stood up from the table, ready to leave the room.

"Theo, stop," she begged, "you're embarrassing us both. Your friends will-"

"I don't care what they do. If they don't accept it, they're not my friends. If anyone wants to fight me for having feelings for a muggleborn, I can fight, I've never lost a duel."

The whole Great Hall fell silent, even the teachers didn't try to intervene, when they saw Theo pulling out a small, black velvet box.

"I want you to wear this ring," he opened the box, "as my promise to always protect you from whoever tries to harm you or our relationship."

"It's beautiful, but..." Y/n was speechless by the sight of the ring. It was silver with two gemstones forming a subtle heart - half emerald and half ruby.

"It was custom made and if you accept it, I'll once get you a matching engagement ring. Also, there are thorns which will hurt you when you try taking it off. I want you forever, Y/n Granger."

The ring in the black velvet box sparkled under the enchanted ceiling. The Great Hall remained in silence as Theo poured his heart out, confessing his love. The unexpected turn of events had everyone on edge.

Slytherins exchanged intrigued glances, Gryffindors shared confused looks and even the teachers seemed to not know how to react. Y/n could feel the weight of everyone's eyes on her, and for a moment, she considered the potential consequences of accepting Theo's proposal.

"Theo," she began, her voice breaking, "it's not that simple."

"I know it is. But I can't keep hiding my feelings, Y/n. I've tried, and it's tearing me apart. I'll protect you from whatever comes our way."

Y/n looked at the ring, then back at him. "I believe in second chances. And I appreciate your sincerity. I accept the ring, Theo."

Theo carefully took the ring from the box and gently slid it onto Y/n's finger. The Great Hall burst with cheering and applause, only the Slytherin table didn't seem so enthusiastic about this.

Theo placed his hands on Y/n's waist, pulling her in for a kiss. She didn't hesitate to kiss him back, her hands sinking in his dense her yet the ring on her finger still visible, reflecting the light from the ceiling.

[littlexdeaths]

strange love - s.h.

king steve harrington x loser fem reader

everybody wants to know, if we fucked on the bathroom sink…

18+ ONLY MDNI

warnings: underage drinking (everyone is 18+), mean!dom steve, steve is a major asshole, public sex, light degradation kink, unprotected piv sex, cream pie, steve makes reader cry, some good ole’ angst

a/n: this is a reworking of my first steeb fic i ever wrote on my old account. i hope you enjoy xx. and thank you to @stveharringtn for looking this over and hyping me up. ily cherry 💕

based on strange love by halsey

word count: 2.4k

You shouldn’t have come to this stupid party.

And you wouldn’t have, if Steve hadn’t practically begged you to make an appearance. It was only going to lead to more heartbreak for you, having to watch him flirt with every girl in the room. The night would end with you going home alone, wondering why you weren’t good enough to be on his arm.

Despite all that you go anyway, your heart severely outweighing the logical side of your brain. You even made sure to wear your best dress, hoping it would capture his attention. But the male didn’t glance your way the entire night, and you felt utterly defeated.

Why you didn’t leave after an hour of being ignored is beyond you, a small part of you still holding out hope. Leaning against a wall in the hallway you watch with disdain as your classmates drunkenly grind on each other. It was one of the last parties of the summer before college classes started, and everyone seemed to be making the most of it.

Everyone except for you.

“This was a stupid idea,” you mumble to yourself, glancing down at your drink with a deep sigh.

Swirling the now lukewarm beer around in your cup, no longer interested in people watching. Drunken laughter pulls you from your sulking, watching in utter annoyance as Tommy attempts a keg stand in the middle of the living room.

A large crowd has surrounded him, giving you the perfect opportunity to find Jonathan and leave.

However, feeling a piece of paper being slipped into your hand stops you dead in your tracks. Your eyes searching for the source of the note. A familiar flutter starts in your lower belly as you catch sight of him, the male now halfway up the stairs. You quickly unravel the crumpled page to find a few words written in his messy script.

You immediately crumple the note in your palm, downing the rest of your beer before you make your way up to the second floor. Despite the large and somewhat confusing layout, you navigated the dark halls with ease. As you knew the male's house far too well now, having found yourself in his bed more times than you liked to admit.

This wasn’t supposed to happen like this, it was only meant to be a one time thing. To get back at your cheating asshole of an ex-boyfriend, Troy. After finding him tangled in the sheets with Vicki Carmichael at a party quite similar to this one. All because you weren’t ready to have sex with him. As much as it stung, a bigger part of you was incredibly relieved.

Something never fully cliqued with him, and deep down you didn’t want him to be your first. Troy and Steve were very good friends, and played basketball together. So it seemed fitting to ask Steve to be the one to take your virginity. Telling yourself it would royally piss Troy off, knowing you’d give it up to Steve and not him. But the truth is you’d always secretly had a thing for Steve for years.

That was your real reason, not that you’d ever admit it.

Steve was more than happy to fulfill your wish, not knowing your motive behind it. But what neither of you expected was that he would keep coming back for more. Once he had a taste of you, he couldn’t get enough. You had him wrapped around your finger, without even realizing it. However you both made a promise to keep the whole thing a secret, any plans of revenge now being thrown out the window.

Now that you weren’t dating Troy you had gone back to your quiet loser status, which you much preferred anyway. But Steve couldn’t have that ruining his reputation, so instead of arguing you went along with it. Agreeing to a secret friend with benefits relationship, despite knowing you’d want more. Feelings aside it didn’t stop you from hooking up with him multiple times a week, which brings you back to the present.

Your breathing was labored, partially due to the hand covering your mouth. You could hear the bass of the music from outside the bathroom door, so there was no need to be extra quiet.

But with Steve it was a necessity… especially in such a public place. Where anyone could press their ear to the door and figure out what was happening.

You found yourself bent over the bathroom sink, Steve fucking into you with such a ferocity it made your knees wobble. He had barely let the bathroom door shut before he was on you, tugging your panties down your legs. Tugging his shirt over his head, not bothering to take off his jeans in his impatience to have you.

“God, you’re such a little tease you know that? Wearing this fucking dress, getting me all worked up.” He growled in your ear, whimpering against his hand as he pounds into your soaked heat.

The male is gripping your hip so hard you know he’ll leave bruises behind, but the harsh action only turns you on more. Knowing how desperate he was to have you, made you putty in his strong hands. Your own hand drifts between your thighs, finding your bundle of nerves and encircling it with your fingertips.

Glancing into the mirror in front of you, you watch his face as he continues to ram himself inside you. His honey brown hair sticks to his forehead, no longer styled in the perfect swoop he had it in before you entered the bathroom. His dark eyes meet yours in the reflection, a knowing smirk playing on his lips as he watches you intensely.

“Hm, look at how pathetic you look honey… letting me use you like a whore.” He grunts, leaning in closer and tugging on your earlobe with his teeth, “But you like that don’t you? You like being my whore?”

You find yourself nodding, unable to speak. Partially due to the hand still covering your mouth, but you knew even if it wasn't there it wouldn’t have made much difference. The male had fucked any logical thoughts from you at that point.

But you can’t deny the way your body reacts to his words, your walls tightening around him at the mere mention of belonging to him… and him alone. Something Steve doesn’t miss either.

“That’s cute, baby…” he chuckles, letting his lips graze along the exposed skin of your throat. “Glad she knows exactly who she belongs to.”

Tears of pleasure blur your vision, mascara streaming freely down your cheeks. Your fucked out reflection stares back at you as he continues to pound into you from behind. Hooded eyes drift to gaze at him once more, seeing how his mouth falls open in a moan as you continue to pulse around his cock.

His sun kissed skin was beautifully flushed, his days spent as a lifeguard at Hawkin’s community pool were treating him extremely well. It made you want nothing more than to leave a trail of dark bruises along his freckled neck— effectively marking him as yours.

But you knew that couldn’t happen, he wouldn’t allow it. His reputation as the town’s local biggest player was far more important to him than you could ever be. At least that’s what he wanted you to believe.

You watch in awe as his head tilts back, exposing more of his throat to you. His adam’s apple bobs as he moans, fighting the urge to push him against the wall and taste the sweat that’s coating his skin in a glossy sheen.

Steve just looked so pretty like this, on the edge of release. While you had witnessed it many times now— part of you still was so mesmerized by him.

You can feel your orgasm bubbling up inside you, continuing to rub your clit faster. You cry out against his hand, the whimper of his name now muffled by his palm. Your eyes nearly roll back as your orgasm crashes over you. But Steve doesn’t let up his pace, your knees almost buckling as he fucks into you harder.

“I know you can cum harder than that honey, do. it. again.” He growls lowly in your ear, dropping his hand away from your mouth.

Quickly knocking your own out of the way to continue rubbing your overly sensitive clit. You’d barely come down from your first high before he had you hurtling towards another one, his cock hitting that sweet spot inside you with acute precision.

Your eyes meet once more in the reflection, a cocky expression crosses over his features as you feel yourself falling over the edge again. Gripping the counter with both hands, biting down harshly on your lower lip to stop the scream that wants to escape your lungs.

In your euphoric state you don’t notice the way Steve’s eyes watch you possessively, pride filling his chest knowing he’s the only man who has ever seen you like this. The only man to ever make you feel this way, and he planned on keeping it that way. Selfish as it was.

The blissed out look on your face is the thing that finally breaks what little composure he had left. The male burying his face in the crook of your neck as he paints your inner walls with his release. Stilling his hips at your deepest point, in an attempt to keep his cum buried inside you.

Steve’s secret way of marking you as his.

As both of you attempt to catch your breath, the sounds of the party carry on as if nothing happened. When Steve finally releases your hips, you grip tighter onto the counter to support yourself. Knowing your knees were far too wobbly to keep you upright. A soft whimper leaves your lips as he slides out of you, suddenly feeling empty. In more ways than one.

The male is quick to tuck himself back into his jeans, roughly pulling your panties up your legs. You can feel his cum beginning to pool in the lacy material, the dirtiness of it makes your body feel hot. You let out a shaky breath, turning to face him as he finishes tucking his polo back into his levi’s.

“Wait a few minutes before you come back downstairs, yeah?” Is all he says before he’s slipping out of the bathroom, running a hand through his tousled locks.

The door closes softly, and that familiar feeling of shame washes over you again. You shouldn’t be surprised by it at this point, as your little hookups always ended the same way.

With Steve thoroughly pleased with himself, and you all alone.

You can’t stop the moisture from flooding your vision, carefully sitting down on the edge of the tub. Gripping the hem of your dress in your fists as you ruin whatever makeup was still left behind. Shoulders shaking as silent sobs rack through your chest.

In that moment you made a promise to yourself, you wouldn’t let any man— especially someone like Steve fucking Harrington make you feel this way again. It wasn’t worth it. He wasn’t worth it.

You continue to let the traitor tears fall for a while before returning to your feet. Glancing back in the mirror you barely recognized yourself, your usual bright eyes were dull, bloodshot and puffy. The little makeup you had done was now smeared across your cheeks. With a frustrated sigh you attempt to collect yourself before returning to the party.

Cleaning the black streaks from your face, adjusting your rumpled dress until you looked somewhat presentable. Taking a deep breath you finally leave the safety of the bathroom, descending the carpeted stairs on shaky legs. No one pays you any mind as you make your way back into the sea of people.

But what you find in the living room feels like a punch straight to the gut.

Steve is on the couch, another girl already straddling his lap with her tongue down his throat. His large hands that were previously gripping onto your hips were now splayed across her bare thighs. Inching higher and higher up as she tangles her fingers in his hair. You can only stand to watch for a moment longer before bolting out of the room and into the kitchen in search of another drink.

Thankfully the room was almost empty, except for a familiar brunette who was sipping on a can of Pepsi. You don’t say anything to him, grabbing an open bottle of vodka off the counter and bringing the rim to your lips. Enjoying the familiar burn as you greedily gulp down the clear liquid at an alarming fast rate.

Jonathan looks at you concerned, immediately rushing to your side in an attempt to grab the bottle from you. You quickly dodge him, shoving him away with a dirty look.

“Jonny stop! I’m having fun, see?” You roll your eyes before dramatically taking another large swig. Your best friend had seen you drink plenty of times before, but never like this. He knew you well enough to know there was clearly something wrong.

Before you can go back in for another drink he grips onto the base of the bottle, wrestling it from you with a grimace. Before slamming it back onto the counter, making you wince slightly at the sound of the impact.

“That’s enough now. I think I should take you home.”

His tone is stern, but laced with worry. You find yourself pouting in response, a small hiccup leaving you as he sighs. The only reason Jonathan was even here in the first place was to be your ride, he hated these parties. And he especially hated Steve Harrington.

But he was your best friend, and he would’ve done anything for you. And right now anything consists of getting you home before you do something stupid, “Fine dad… take me home then.”

Jonathan rolls his eyes at your childish behavior before wrapping his arm around your waist to help guide you through the house to the front door. The vodka you had just chugged was definitely starting to take effect, as you stumbled alongside him. Now suddenly a lot more grateful for his help.

What you don’t notice in your tipsy state was a pair of honey eyes watching you both from across the room, jaw clenched in jealousy as Jonathan helps you out into the warm summer night.

[bettinadoodles]

Reunion

And a tiny drabble to set the scene... ♡

Caleb x MC

CW: grief/comfort, slight angst

WC: 245

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

"...Caleb?"

Not yet daring to believe, she reaches out a shaky hand to touch, to confirm.

"Hey, pip-squeak."

A sob rips through her in response to the familiar nickname she never expected to hear again. Not in that voice. Not from those lips. The precarious dam that has been holding back her grief for the past six months finally bursts. She crumbles along with it, collapsing to the ground, clinging to him like he's her last lifeline. In his arms, all the emotions she has kept bottled up finally find their release and come spilling out in harsh waves. All the questions of how, and where, and why are pushed aside because the only thing that matters right now is that he's here. So solid. So alive.

"Caleb... You... -- I thought... I... -- I missed you. So much." It's all she can manage to force out through the sobs that are tearing through her, shaking her whole body.

Caleb tightens his grip on her. He has loved her for longer than she could possibly know. His heart aches to see her like this. Yet... a part of him is almost elated seeing the force of the emotions she's spilling out all for him. The way she is clinging to him so desperately. Calling his name with so much longing. Maybe, just maybe there is a chance... 

He never wants to let go of her again.

"I'm here now pip-squeak, I've got you.”

------

Listen, the logical part of my brain tells me circumstances will likely prevent them from having a big emotional moment when Caleb finally comes back, but this is what my heart craves, and what our poor MC deserves. ♡

[gilverrwrites]

Call me Tim

Tim Drake/Reader, 2K

[Say his name, P2] AN: I did not expect part 1 to be se well recieved, here hoping part 2 was worth the wait! CWs: Breach of trust, teasing, semi-public foreplay, mildly stalker-ish behaviour on Tims part.

Tim had always told himself that fucking his fans was not a thing for him. Not a kink. Bernard was different, he just had so much passion. He would have been into him regardless of whatever he was fixated on.

Then you happened.

Ever since he’s been telling himself that it was coincidence, not causation. And again, he liked you before he found out you’d spent your formative years kissing cutouts of him. Well, he doesn’t know that part for sure, but he liked to imagine it. Point being; your adolescent crush on him was not the driving force behind his attraction to you.

But as he found himself plotting ways to naturally bump into you as Tim Drake-Wayne, it was becoming increasingly harder to deny that he maybe was, a little bit, kind of into it.

Hitting you up online? Too out of the blue.

Turning up at your house? Way too much.

Then one night the perfect opportunity arose. He’d overheard you making plans to meet some friends at an uptown bar later that week. He wasn’t scheduled to patrol that night. Despite the logical part of his brain telling him it was a creepy move, he just couldn’t pass up the chance. Red Robin had to be so cautious around you, but if you hit it off with Tim he could let a little loose around you.

That’s how he’s ended up sitting on the table adjacent to yours, listening in on your private conversation and praying you wouldn’t recognise him before he was ready.

“So have you guys ever had someone ask you to call them by a different name when you’re… you know?” He nearly coughs on his drink, sitting bolt upright as though it will help him hear better. He trusts you not to spill on who the guy is. You’d had that conversation already, but he wants to hear you say Tim again.

“What like ‘Daddy’? Yeah, my ex was into that.”

“No.” Your voice has grown so quiet, laced with a sheepish laugh just like the morning you’d confessed about your crush to him. God, he wishes he could turn around and look at your face. He’d bet you’re all flustered. “Like, another actual man’s name?”

“No, hon. That’s weird.”

“Who’s the guy? Whose name?”

“You don’t know him.” You shut down the first question. He bets your fidgeting, looking at anything other than your friends as you consider your next words cafeully. “But he wanted me to call him Tim. As in, Tim Drake.”

“That’s really weird. Did he know you used to be down bad for him?”

He knows it's mean to turn around now, and worse, risky. Liable to scare you away but it’s so worth it to see the five stages of grief cross your face in the span of 3 seconds when you notice him. You're like a starstruck deer in the headlights as the word “yeah” dies on your lips. If he cupped your cheeks right now, he's certain the heat would burn away any remnants of his fingerprints.

The whole table falls silent as one by one, your friend’s clue into the situation. If it weren’t for their sickly amused smiles, and the foley of the bar, you’d think the world has stopped turning. You wish the world would stop turning.

He’s staring at you with an almost impish smile and your fight, flight, or freeze kicks in. You opt for stuttering “I have to piss!” As you abruptly leave the table.

I have to piss. You just bumped into The Tim Drake, and the first things he heard from your mouth were that you’d called his name while hooking up with someone, and I have to piss.   

The queue to the solo bathroom in this place is always long, and usually you’d be annoyed but tonight you’re grateful for the extra time to compose yourself, or you would be if you apparently hadn’t been followed.

“So, is he your boyfriend?” Where the fuck had he come from? You hadn’t seen him approach at all.

“He’s…” Not, not your boyfriend. You see each other at least weekly, sometimes you cook for him, and he often brings you gifts. However, you’ve never had that conversation, you don’t even know who he is under the mask. You don’t have his phone number. Despite multiple sexual encounters, you hadn’t even seen him naked. Now that you think about it, there’s a definite power imbalance in whatever you have. “Why?”

You’re much more defensive of his teasing than you are with Red Robin. Understandable, you didn’t really know Tim, and he’s really hit you out of left field. This is all turning out a bit crueller than he’d intended, but he can’t bring himself to stop. Your apprehension tonight is as tempting as your timidness had been last time. It’s like he’s trying to seduce you on hard mode.

“Just tryin’ to find out if it would be appropriate to buy you a drink, maybe ask you to dance?” He sounds off. Not like he does in the TV interviews and podcasts you’d heard him on, but still familiar. It’s hard to focus on, however, because he’s standing so close. Close enough for you to smell the fresh sweetness of his aftershave, for you to see the features you’ve been fantasising about up close.

“This place doesn’t have a dance floor.”

“We could go to another place.”

“Oh no buddy, I’m not going to any secondary locations.” He can’t help the smile that crosses his lips. You remembered his safety tip. He just hopes it reads as anything other than prideful to you right now. “Don’t think for a second just cause you heard what you heard that I’m gonna fall all over you.”

“Buddy? You can call me Tim.” The obvious innuendo has you cracking a genuine smile. Your nerves are still apparent from the way you're tapping your fingers against your thigh, and your refusal to make meaningful eye contact with him but he’s chipping at your walls. There's four people waiting ahead, and he wonders if he can breach your shields completely before it's your turn. “Or if it makes you feel better you could call me whatever that other guy’s name is.”

“Is this how you get people to sleep with you? You tease them relentlessly until they give up just so you’ll go away when it’s over?”

“Ouch.” You have a point, he’s never behaved like this before. He’s always been a self-confessed smartass, but you just bring out something especially brazen within him. Something wicked. He’s being a jerk, but you’re chewing your lips and sneaking awed glances at him, which implies you’re more into it than you’d admit. “Am I not what you expected?”

He probably would live up to your expectations had this been your real first meeting. If he wasn’t already comfortable around you, he’d be enamoured by your appearance, too skittish to match your keen whit or ask about your hobbies, not when you look at him with those eyes. If anything, the typical Tim Drake persona might even bore you by rambling on about detective novels or WayneTech.

“You’re why people say you should never meet your heroes.”

“Okay, fine.” Maybe he had gotten a bit carried away messing with you. “Can I just ask you one more thing, and then I’ll go away, or buy you a drink? Whatever you want.”

Your eyes drift up to the ceiling as you consider his offer. It’s not an uncommon tick for people to have, but it’s certainly more endearing when you do it. Eventually, you nod, conceding to him and offering real, esrnest eye contact. You’re still willing to hear out your favourite celebrity, and a pang of guilt at once again abusing his authority thrums through his chest.

It doesn’t stop him from asking, however. “What clued this guy into your crush on me?”

“Pictures.” You frown, still not breaking eye contact. Something is different. The nervous energy you’ve been emanating since he’d followed you to the line has subsided, replaced by something tantalisingly self-assured.

“Pictures of what?”

He tries to pry but you give him nothing.

“Of you.”

“What kind of pictures.”

The answers here don’t matter to him anyway, he already knows. He’s just trying to segue into a specific set of questions.

“Just, pictures.”

“How ambiguous.” Here’s his chance to try and satisfy that burning fantasy. “Did you practice kissing on them?”

“What? No.” Your tense shoulders say otherwise. “Why would you even ask that?”

“I don’t know.” Perfect. He gives his best noncommittal shrug before leaning in closer, balancing his weight on the wall behind you until the distance between your bodies is closed. He can still pick up hints of your body wash, but it’s washed out but the smell of a parfum that he wishes he could spray on his pillows at night. “Thought I’d offer you the real thing to compare.”

Your response isn’t what he’s expected, but it is what he’s hoped. Your lips press softly against the corner of his lips, and he can’t stop from locking a hand on your hip, not to force anything further, but to stop you from backing away. Although, the wall he has you partly confined against has been doing a pretty good job thus far.

He needn’t bother, however, because it doesn’t take long for you to grow more confident. This is the moment he’s been waiting for.

His mouth parts at the first sign of your tongue and you eagerly explore his mouth. He tastes like IPA, hoppy and warm. Your hands boldly play across his chest, until you fist the fabric of his shirt and tug him closer, deepening the kiss until he moans into your open mouth.

Your sudden boldness is doing things for him. Head spinney, dick hard things. Thoughtlessly, he ruts his hips, rubbing his clothes cock against your lower abdomen until you pull away with a laugh. It’s his turn to be nervous. You’re looking at him with something fierce and canny.

“Excuse me.” A clearly unamused man interjects himself between your embrace to point at the bathroom. “Are you waiting?”

“Oh, yeah.” Tim is surprised by your chipper poise, as you smile politely at the man. He’s even more surprised when you hook your fingers into the give of his leather belt and proceed to drag him with you into the cubicle, locking him inside with you as you offer thanks to the stranger.

“What are you doing?”

“Comparing with the real thing.”  You grace him with another, hard kiss, backing him against the door. Your tongue is hot against his already heated skin as you hurriedly work it along his jaw and neck. He remembers how you’d looked when you’d first noticed him earlier and wonders if his burning face looks equally as nonplussed as he lets you have your way with him against the bathroom door.

He hisses when you plunge your fingers below his belt once more, this time unbuckling it. You’ve fucking cracked, he must have broken something in your brain. There’ll be exaggerated stories about this all over the Gotham Globe’s home page tomorrow. Hell, if he cares though.

“You’ve changed your tune.” He comments, bucking his hips, helping you free him from his boxers. Your fingers lock around his base, and it throbs at finally being touched by you. He’s wanted so badly to fuck you for months but as Red Robin, he’s had to be careful, had to put his guard up which had resulted in a very altruistic sex life. But Tim Drake could fuck you. Right here, right now, Tim Drake-Wayne would fuck whatever hole you’d give him and the thought of it has him losing composure fast.

Your lips lock in one last frenzied kiss before you drop to your knees, and you look like an Angel sent from hell, looking up at him from beneath his reddened cock, with heady eyes and salacious smile.

“So, Red.” Shit. His heart skips a beat. Shit. Shit. Shit. He’s not sure what gave him away, but he doesn’t have a chance to care before you spit on his dick and start to pump with a deliberate rhythmic pace that has his head rolling back against the door. He’s not sure if he wishes he’d never done this at all, or if he’d done it sooner. “What name should I use tonight?”

[marlynnofmany]

Paws in a Circle

There’s a poster I saw once, back on Earth, that had a silhouette of a bear with deer antlers, and it was labeled “Beer.” I had forgotten about it completely until I met our newest client, who by that logic was definitely a beer.

I’d already done my part of the interaction by carrying out one of the heavier boxes, so while the captain went over the delivery fees with her, I was free to stare politely and decide which other Earth animals she resembled. (Fur coloring more like a red fox, and semi-upright posture that was less bear and more extinct giant ground sloth.)

I was so focused on watching the client handle the datapad with her giant paws that I completely missed it when the hovercar behind her sprung a fuel leak.

Paint saw it, though. “Oh! Your car!” she yelped, pointing. “I’ll get Mimi!” She was off in a flash of orange scales, back into the ship in search of our mechanic.

The client growled a swear word that didn’t translate, shoved the datapad back at Captain Sunlight, then galloped over to her car. While I expected her to throw open the hood in search of the part that was leaking, she instead made a beeline for the back seat.

When she threw open that door, I saw why.

“Kids! Out of the car! It’s not safe!”

A half dozen bundles of spotted yellow fur tumbled out, making distressed noises that didn’t need translating. They had tiny little antler buds and very big eyes.

Captain Sunlight was busy talking to someone through her communicator, probably Mimi. I stood there uselessly by the packages. What did I know about fuel leaks? Nothing helpful. I knew the puddle was growing by the second, and was probably flammable, but that was about it. And this backwater spaceport barely had an information booth, much less a local response team.

The client ushered her cubs over to where we stood just as Mimi and Paint returned. Blip and Blop followed with a big toolbox carried between them. Mimi was already taking charge and waving tentacles about, talking to the captain about the lack of reliable repair shops this far in the boonies, telling Blip and Blop how best to use their muscles in opening up the engine, and reassuring the customer that this was fine, actually, that model hovercar had a known issue with the fuel lines.

When the client dithered over minding her cubs and being present for the repairs, Captain Sunlight pointed a scaly yellow hand at me. “Our human can keep your little ones entertained. Bring them over here.”

“Uh,” I said.

Captain Sunlight looked up at me, still talking to the client. “She has extensive experience in tending to small furry creatures.”

I wanted to say that veterinarian training and childcare were two very different things, but I wasn’t about to make the captain look bad. And knowing Mimi, this would be quick.

The client said, “Thank you. Kids, you need to stay over here, okay? Next to these boxes, but don’t touch. Listen to the tall one. I’ll be right there helping fix the car.”

The tiny-voiced replies were recognizable words in the most common trade language, though their pronunciation made me clock them at around three or four years old in human years. They were very cute.

And they were suddenly my responsibility, all looking up at me like spotted teddy bears while the rest of the adults fretted about the car.

The questions were immediate.

“What are you?”

“Where’s your fur?”

“Did you lose it because you ate the wrong thing? Mommy says we have to eat our vi’mins so our fur doesn’t fall out.”

“Is this instead of fur?”

I freed the tiny paws tugging at my pants. “I’m not supposed to have fur. I’m a human. And yes, I wear clothes to keep me warm instead.”

“It looks funny.”

“Do you have to brush it?”

“Do you know any games?”

I brightened at that. “Games! Sure, I know some games.” I wracked my brain for something that would keep them entertained without causing new problems. “What kind of games do you like to play?”

They all answered at once in an avalanche of words, bouncing around in excitement, with a couple grabbing each other’s fur to keep from falling over. I couldn’t make out a thing they were saying. But I had the beginning of an idea.

“Do you like dancing in a circle?” I asked.

They had no idea what I was talking about, and possibly no understanding of basic shapes yet. Three of them spun in place while the others waved their arms.

“First you stand in a circle, like this,” I said, sketching out the shape in midair. “Here. You stand here, then you there…” With some gentle nudging — they were so soft — I soon had them arranged in something like a circle. “Now hold hands with the person next to you.”

I was a little concerned that their paws weren’t suited to this, since they had long blunt claws already and didn’t look very dexterous, but they managed. With lots of giggling and hopping in place.

“Now everybody step to the side, in this direction.” I ushered them into a clockwise rotation, nice and slow (and giggling), with no risk of any little fluffy heads bonking onto the spaceship landing pad. It took them a second, then they got the rhythm without tripping over their own feet.

Then they unanimously spun faster, hopping and laughing with squeals and barks that were probably making more than one adult turn to stare. I don’t know; I kept my eyes on the littles. My arms were out and ready in case somebody stumbled and brought the whole circle crashing down.

But no one did. The half dozen youngsters wheeled and spun, bouncing with glee and showing no sign of stopping.

“That’s new,” rumbled a voice behind me. I tried not to flinch when I looked up at the mama bear. Beer. Whatever. She asked, “Is that an activity from your planet?”

“Yeah,” I said. “Pretty basic, and it seemed good for kids.”

The antlered head nodded. “Looks like valuable practice at coordination, as well as teamwork. There are a few adults I know who could benefit from that.”

Images flashed through my head of huge antlered bear aliens doing ring-around-the-rosie as a corporate teambuilding exercise. And professional athletes trying to improve their footwork. “Yeah, they probably could. And it’s a fun bit of community bonding time.”

Mama Bear nodded. “Okay children, the car is fixed,” she announced. “Time to go home.”

The cubs made the exact same disappointed noises as human kids. Even when their mother waded in and picked them up one by one to urge them towards the car, they didn’t want to stop playing. They grabbed hands in pairs and spun off that way, even faster than before. I did have to catch one fuzzy little teddy toddler, who just laughed about it and hopped around some more.

Peripheral vision told me the rest of the crew was helping move the packages into the hovercar’s storage space and mop up the last of the fuel. Overheard conversation told me that the good captain had tactfully gotten us a bonus payment for the mechanical assistance. I couldn’t tell if childcare was part of that, and I didn’t ask. I just focused on herding the excitable youngsters back to their car, where thankfully they all knew how to get into the safety harnesses without help.

Mama Bear closed the door. “Thank you for everything,” she said, directing that at me as well as Captain Sunlight. “I will recommend your services highly to anyone who asks. And we will probably need more deliveries soon, once we get the new house set up, so perhaps we will see you again!”

Captain Sunlight nodded. “Perhaps so. It was a pleasure doing business with you.”

I waved goodbye to the kids, who had found the button to open the window and were just as excitable as ever. “See you later! Maybe next time I can teach you the Hokey Pokey. That’s big on my planet.”

~~~

These are the ongoing backstory adventures of the main character from this book.

Shared early on Patreon! There’s even a free tier to get them on the same day as the rest of the world.

The sequel novel is in progress (and will include characters from these stories. I hadn’t thought all of them up when I wrote the first book, but they’re too much fun to leave out of the second).

[celestialglow24]

•••Promise Me•••

Frank Castle x AFAB reader

You finally see Frank again after months of being apart with no explanation.

hi friends. more Frank angst because this man has taken over my mind lately and i think you all should suffer with me. please enjoy xx

The walk back home from the restaurant wasn’t too bad of a trek. You had convinced yourself it’d be alot faster than waiting around for an uber, or bothering your cousin at 12 am to come down there and pick you up.

Was it wise? Probably not. But the multiple shots of liquid courage—fueled with the desire to take a long hot shower—gave you a sense of confidence no one would have been able to shake.

So you said your goodbyes to the group you were with, telling them a little white lie that your ride was here, and began walking home.

As the loud street music and bustling noise of downtown nightlife started to fade, that confidence began to wane.

It was really quiet out here, and no one was around from what you could tell. You could see the sign for a park a little ways ahead and that managed to level your nerves.

Your cousin’s apartment wasn’t too far from there and if you kept at the pace you were moving, you could get there in 10 minutes or so.

God you hated wearing heels. You’d yet to find a pair that didn’t make you want to cut off your feet and curse the ground after only a couple of hours of use.

There was a part of you that was half tempted to take them off and walk the rest of the way barefoot, but after already passing several broken bottles along the street, you decided you didn’t want to chance a night in the ER.

All things considered you were proud of yourself for going out tonight. It had been months since you’d done anything besides: work, sleep, eat, repeat.

Save for a few weekends now and then of binge watching a true crime doc with your cousin Lucy or a trip to the dog park with her dog Penny, you hardly allowed yourself any time to relax.

Anything to avoid your mind having the opportunity to think of him. To think of your past.

So when your coworker invited you out with people from your department to celebrate their recent promotion, you decided to let yourself enjoy a night out. You felt you had earned it.

You hadn’t been working for the company very long, but you got along with everyone pretty well. It was nice of them to include you.

It was certainly more fun than you expected to have but after your brain had tried multiple times to convince you that you’d seen someone that wasn’t there—someone who you hadn’t seen in months—you knew it was time to go.

6 months.

6 months and you still searched for him in a room full of people.

It was pathetic.

Even now, as you walked the nearly empty streets you felt him. You didn’t know how— and despite logic and reason battling with these inexplicable feelings— it still felt like you could sense his presence.

Yeah, this had to be the alcohol talking.

You tightened your trenchcoat around your torso in an effort to self soothe and offered a half smile to the few people you walked by on your way toward the park.

As you rounded the sidewalk, you pulled your phone out to text your cousin that you’d be home any minute. She was probably already sleeping but you wanted to give her the heads up anyway.

Anything to avoid her attacking you with a broom like she did the one time you got home late from work.

Just as you went to tuck your phone back in your coat pocket it slipped out of your hand, landing on the ground face down with a loud crack.

“Fuck” you cried, bending down to asses the damage. Thankfully you had a screen protector, so the actual screen was fine. But man you had done a number on it. The uneven cracks that splintered the screen made it difficult to read the time and notifications.

As you rose from your squatting position, you caught a figure out of the corner of your eye ducking behind a car across the street.

You felt your stomach drop.

Slowly… you stood up taller, squaring your shoulders and trying to steady your breathing. You calmly reached for the front clasp of your clutch, thanking any god or the universe that you managed to stow your taser earlier that night.

You chose not to make any sudden movements. Instead you waited. You waited for so long you were starting to question if you had seen anything at all. Maybe you misunderstood and it was the alcohol messing with your senses.

But when you saw the tip of a black hoodie through the window of the car you knew you weren’t losing it.

“Who’s there?” you shouted.

No response.

“Listen,” your voice shook, “I’m about 10 seconds away from dialing 911 so if you’re not interested in explaining to the cops why you’re sneaking up on -”

“Ain’t no need for all that.” You heard a voice call back.

Your breath stilled. As soon as the voice hit you, it was like the ground beneath you had been ripped away. You didn’t even feel like you were in your own body anymore.

You dug your nails into your palm, trying to startle yourself awake. Surely you had to be dreaming.

But when the figure stood and faced you, their hood falling back to reveal their face, you couldn’t deny what you were seeing.

There were so many emotions swelling inside you at once. Disbelief, disappointment, anger and relief.

You didn’t know it was possible to feel so many things at once.

Perhaps the most compelling was the realization that despite everything, you still felt love. So much love that it made you feel weak.

It almost made you forget everything that’s happened.

The feelings of abandonment. The nights of endless tears. The calls and messages that would never seem to go through.

Feelings of confusion. Of constantly wondering what you did wrong.

Questioning if any of it was ever as real to him as it was to you.

You could almost forget it all. Run right across the street into his arms. Hug him and kiss him over and over. Tell him how much you missed him. How much you need him. How much you forgive him if you could just be together again.

But as quickly as those thoughts teased your mind, the feelings of anger and betrayal enveloped you like an unrelenting wave.

You couldn’t allow the love you felt to erase the hell you’ve endured. You wouldn’t.

So you swallowed the tears that threatened to spill and turned away, making bigger strides to get back to your cousin’s apartment.

You could hear him shout your name but you kept moving.

He must have crossed the street because you could hear him calling directly behind you.

You didn’t stop. You didn’t say a word. You just kept moving.

Choosing to run was just plain stupid, but it was your only resort to get away fast.

Not only was it stupid because your feet hurt like hell and you were risking a face plant any second, but it was stupid because he was the fucking punisher.

Any attempt to try and outrun him was pointless. He’d be able to catch you before you could even finish your next thought.

“Hey!” he yelled, finally catching up to you and grabbing your arm. “Just hold up would you?”

“No!” you shouted, yanking yourself out of his grasp. You took a few steps backward and he held his arms up in defense.

At this point you know you looked like a mess. The hot tears you were trying to suppress had spilled over and you could taste the salt of them on your tongue.

You wanted to hate him. You wanted to hate him so much but seeing the pained look on his face broke your heart.

To be honest he looked like shit. He looked like a man who hadn’t slept in months. His beard was long and unkempt. It even looked like he’d lost weight. And his eyes, the biggest tell of all, were sad and empty.

“I just want to talk.” he spoke calmly.

You shook your head. “How did you find me?”

When you left the witness protection program you didn’t even tell Madani where you were going. She tried to pry it out of you, swearing that it was her duty as her job and as a friend to know. However, you wouldn’t budge.

The people that were after Frank had been taken care of according to Dinah. You didn’t want to continue living out the rest of your life looking over your shoulder.

So you thanked her for all of her help and you wished her the best, but you didn’t want any ties to your life back then. You didn’t want any more reminders of him.

“He asks about you, you know?” she had said during your last conversation. “Every week like clockwork. I haven’t told him anything. Just that you’re safe and happy.”

You scoffed, “Well at least one of those is true.”

She was silent for a moment. “I hope you can give yourself a chance to be happy again. Love doesn’t always look the way we want it to and life is hardly ever fair, but once we choose to accept the pieces we are given…. we can allow ourselves to move on.”

You know Dinah meant well. And you appreciated how close the two of you had gotten based on the circumstances. But you weren’t sure if you could agree with what she was suggesting. It felt impossible to move on when your whole body still ached for him.

“Thank you Dinah.” you relented, “Who knew you could be so therapeutic?”

“Just part of the charm.” she laughed.

A comfortable silence fell between you. You were sitting on the balcony of your cousin’s apartment, and for a brief second you felt a little bit of excitement at the opportunity to start over.

Your cousin had managed to get you a job and while it wasn’t exactly what you were doing before, it was familiar work.

You’d be working for a publishing company polishing and approving manuscripts. It was boring, monotonous work but it was safe.

You thanked Madani again and expressed the hope of following up again someday in the future.

Then you changed your number and disabled your emails.

You knew doing so wouldn’t stop them from being able to find you if they really wanted to. Her and Frank were both good for that. But it gave you a sense of control for now. That you were the one deciding to distance yourself this time and the choice wasn’t being made for you.

“Could we go some place to talk?”, his voice broke you out of the memory.

You crossed your arms.

“No. You don’t get to show up out of nowhere after months of silence expecting to just talk. I have nothing to say to you.”

The words that tumbled out of your mouth were meant to be delivered with strength and conviction. Instead, they sounded more like someone trying to convince themselves that they believed them.

“I can explain whatever you want. Just let’s get out of the cold here, there’s a diner not too far out.” he said, tilting his head back towards where you came from. “We could get a cup of co-”

“No, Frank, I want to stay right here.”

He closed his mouth, but you could tell he was trying to keep his composure. You were being stubborn and as much as you hated being in the cold, you didn't want to be around other people.

You didn’t want to take the chance of losing your shit while people were trying to enjoy their food in peace.

“I get that you’re angry, but there’s a lot you don’t understand. I was just trying to protect you.” he tried to reason.

“You left me Frank. You didn’t text, you didn’t call. You left me completely in the dark.” you cried, wiping angrily at your face to rid the tears that were escaping.

“Do you know how scared I was? Having strangers show up to my house and basically tell me I couldn’t exist as me anymore? I had to move and change my name. And the one person I needed more than anything—the one person who could make all of it feel okay— wouldn't even answer a damn phone call.”

You suddenly felt like you were back in the empty apartment Madani had set you up in. You hardly knew her before that day, she was just “someone who had worked with Frank before”, according to what she told you.

But she kept giving you this look. This look that both expressed the pity she felt for you and the wonder of how you ended up in a situation like this? How you managed to get mixed up in the world of Frank Castle?

But you had met him after he had left that life behind him. And according to him, the life that he was never going back to. Things had been good for so long that you never even questioned it until that day. Now you didn’t even know what was real.

“You were in danger alright? I had angered some really powerful people. I had hurt them, did things I’m not proud of and I wasn’t about to let you take the fall for it. You weren’t safe with me.”

“I was always safe with you!” you shouted, “Who else could’ve kept me more safe than you? We could’ve worked it out together, we could’ve came up with a plan—” you stopped as you watched Frank shake his head in disbelief, “What, Frank? What the fuck is that about?”

“You have no idea what you’re talking about. Come up with a plan? Really?” he scoffed, “This isn’t team sports. It’s not some dumb escape room you sit around and solve clues in. It’s real fucking life.”

You looked down at your feet. The escape room comment was a low blow. It was something you loved doing and grumpy Frank hated. He’d go along with it if you planned it, not bothering to hide his disdain at first, but by the end of it you knew he had fun with you.

You didn’t think he’d throw it in your face as a means to mock you.

“Frank, we were partners. That’s what you do.” you replied, trying to keep your voice steady. “You work through things together. As a team. Not one person taking over and telling the other person what to do all the time, but see you didn’t ever want to do that did you? You didn’t think I was capable right?”

“Don’t go there.” he warned. You could see his hands start to twitch. In the past his agitation would have gotten you to dial it back a little. You hated fighting with him and it was never worth it.

But this time you didn’t care. You didn’t understand why he was the one so angry.

“Why not?” you probed, “You always made it seem like I was one mistake away from getting myself hurt.”

“That’s because you never took things seriously. You had no sense of danger. Too trusting, too carefree, too-”

“Stupid?” you interjected.

“I didn't say that.” he shot back. He ran his hands through his hair, trying to find some place to channel the tension. You could tell this was not how he wanted the conversation to be going either.

You couldn’t believe you were having this same fight. It was something you never got along about.

You tried to be understanding. You both had different life experiences and because Frank had a military background, he had been trained to look at things a certain way.

He was trained to look for a threat and “take it out before it took you”. Transitioning back to civilian life wasn’t always that simple. Those habits could be hard to unlearn.

It wasn’t always bad, but it wasn’t always necessary.

Not every stranger was a potential threat set out to hurt you.

Staying late at work didn’t mean you were in danger and someone was holding you hostage.

Interviewing a source for your upcoming news article didn’t immediately put a target on your back.

But Frank always anticipated the worst.

You know it was his way of expressing his love but it could be a lot at times. You just wanted to enjoy life together without always feeling like there was some danger lurking around the corner waiting to get you.

“Go ahead Frank,” you continued, “Let me hear how stupid it was for me to walk home by myself tonight. How naive it was to risk getting hurt when I should’ve called a cab.”

“I ain’t gonna act like it was a good idea, and up until a few minutes ago I’m sure you were realizin it wasn’t either.”

You let out a groan.

“I was almost home, besides I don’t think anyone would’ve tried anything with the big bad punisher stalking me.” you said, throwing your arms out dramatically.

“I mean really Frank, what was your plan? Were you just gonna jump out and shout surprise? Were you gonna follow me home to make sure no one grabbed me? Stare down the cars that drove past me? The people that passed me? What was the fucking point?”

For a moment he didn’t say anything.He kept his gaze down at his boots. The twitching of his hands had stopped, and the heavy rise and fall of his chest had slowed down.

“I needed to see you.”

The phrase was simple, but it held such weight.

You understood what he meant. You felt the desperation in his voice. And yet you couldn’t stop the anger from bubbling up.

“What about all the times I needed to see you? To hear your voice? Why didn’t I deserve the decency of a phone call, a text message, anything?”

“I couldn’t risk it.”

“Bullshit.” you spat. “You could risk asking Madani about me?”

His head shot up at that.

“Are we gonna do this all night?” he asked, the anger picking up in his voice again, “Huh? We’re gonna just keep yelling at each other? Who was right? Who was wrong?”

“Yes Frank because I’m angry with you! You made me feel unimportant. You made me feel helpless, like I had no control over my own damn life anymore.” You stepped closer, making sure he couldn’t avoid your eyes.

“You pushed me away like I meant nothing to you!” you shoved him.

“No.” he shouted, “I pushed you away because you meant everything to me!”

He turned away and let out a deep breath through his nose. The weight of his words slamming into you like a wrecking ball.

“Everyone I've ever cared about gets hurt because of me. Because of my demons. Because of the shit I've done to other people. I couldn't take that chance with you. They were so close to hurting you. I had to do something. That’s why I contacted Madani. That’s why we got you into witness protection.”

You felt the sting of the tears start to swell up again. From anger, frustration or sadness you couldn’t tell. Maybe it was all three.

“You want to know why I couldn’t say goodbye to you? Why I couldn’t call you? It’s because I knew—,” he paused and looked off to the side, “I knew that if I saw you—if I just heard your fucking voice—I’d change my mind.”

He finally locked eyes with you again, taking a step closer to you. He was testing it out, seeing how close you would let him get. To his surprise you didn’t move away.

“I couldn’t be selfish with you.” he said softly.

You didn’t know what to say. You knew the people that had been after Frank were relentless, but you never once feared for your life. Maybe there was more to it that he kept from you, and you wanted to trust him, but it didn’t diminish what you experienced while he was gone.

“Sweetheart, I’m sorry I hurt you. But I’m not sorry I did it because you’re safe. And I know it’s probably not what you want to hear, but I’d do it again in a fucking hearbeat if it meant nothing would happen to you.”

“It’s just—.” your voice trembled and you bit your bottom lip. You couldn’t look at him. You couldn’t put the words together.

“What is it?” he asked gently, taking another step towards you. This time he was close enough he grabbed the bottom of your chin and tilted it up towards him.

“I really missed you and I didn’t think you cared about me anymore.” You choked.

Suddenly you felt yourself pressed up against his chest as he pulled you into him. “No baby, that’s not true.” he soothed.

You wrapped your arms around his torso and laid your head on his chest, letting all the pent up emotions slowly release. God you forgot how good it felt to be held by him.

All the nights you longed for this very feeling. For him to hug you and kiss you and tell you everything was gonna be alright.

You could feel your unsteady breathing start to level out again and all the anger and frustration slowly disappear. It was as if he was a magnet, pulling out the deepest emotions you tried so hard to bury.

“I missed you so fucking much you have no idea.” He pulled back, tilting his head down to look at you.

You both locked eyes and without thinking twice you kissed him. He responded instantly, pulling you so tightly against him it was as if he was trying to swallow you whole.

That feeling people mention of the world standing still—you finally understood what that meant.

When you couldn’t breathe anymore you pulled away, resting your forehead against his.

“What does this mean, Frank?” you quietly asked. “Can we be together now? Do we just go back to the way things were before?”

He was quiet for a moment and you almost regretted asking the question.

“It’s whatever you want it to be sweetheart.” he finally answered, “You tell me.”

You weren’t sure what to say. One half of you wanted to be together again. The other half wasn’t so sure you should give in this easily.

What if it happened again? You didn’t doubt there were more people out there that’d like to see Frank Castle and the people he loved, hurt.

Would he push you away? You didn’t think you could survive it a second time.

“Frank, I love you. I want to be with you. But I need you to treat me like an equal. I want to be included in decisions. I don’t want to be kept in the dark again, it isn’t fair.”

Though he wasn’t speaking, you could tell the thoughts were churning in his head.

“If something like this comes up again I want to know about it. I want to have a say in how we handle it. Can you please promise me that?”

Frank let out a heavy sigh. He had to fight with the selfish side of him that wanted to say no. This shouldn’t even be something you have to worry about. He’s the one that should be responsible, not you.

But if he was being honest with himself these past several months were hell. He hated not being with you and maybe compromising would be the best thing to do after all.

He didn’t like making promises in general, but as he looked into your eyes he couldn’t bring himself to fight anymore. He needed to be with you just as much as you needed him too.

“Okay.” he agreed quietly.

“Promise me.” you urged again. You needed to hear him say it.

“I promise.”

You didn’t even realize how tense your body had become until you felt your shoulders relax. Frank pulled you into him again and you could feel the tension in him relax as well.

If anyone would have told you an hour ago you’d be standing in the middle of the street being held by Frank you would’ve told them they were crazy.

There were nights you never thought this moment would come. So as the two of you continued to stand there, holding onto each other. You realized there was probably nothing in this world that could match this feeling.

You would make sure that no matter what was waiting for you around the corner, you’d never let go again.

[animaymay]

SxF 96 Analysis: Some Small Details About the Reveal

Ok, hear me out. I haven't even read the manga for Spy x Family (yet); I've only watched seasons 1 and 2 of the anime, but I've somehow stumbled upon spoilers for the last two chapters (ch. 95 and ch. 96), and other small bits here and there.

And since I am not totally caught up on the story, I hesitate to call this a proper analysis since I'm mostly going off of what I know from the anime at this point. But!

I've been following the chatter and excitement following chapter 96 and I just wanted to throw this quick analysis out there, since I haven't seen some of these details mentioned yet.

So, I'm going to focus on this particular moment, just for what it is. Down the line, after catching up and having all of the character and story details, I might revisit this scene again with additional insight.

Of course, I'm sure we've all seen this panel at this point.

At first glance, this panel is beautifully drawn. You can tell that it was drawn with a lot of care and attention to detail. Typically, such manga panels are used to emphasize the fact that this is an important moment for these characters and/or the story.

There are even bits of confetti(?) flying around them, reminiscent of cherry blossom petals; this is another known technique used in manga to indicate the emotional importance of a scene for the characters featured.

That all feels pretty obvious, I'm sure. But I also wanted to point out other small details given here, which could potentially add another layer to this scene for folks.

I've seen a lot of discussion around how Anya's admission here is a big deal (and it is). But I haven't seen anyone mention the small detail here that she whispers, "I can read people's minds."

I believe that is also why we see that speech bubble transparently -- to visually show us the softness of her voice in that moment (in addition to representing Anya's willingness to be transparent about herself).

However, let's consider the conversation up until this moment. Right before, Damian had jokingly asked her, "How did you know about my dog and the pond, anyway? What, did you read my mind or something?!"

Of course, he was not expecting Anya to say, "Yes". But it's not the fact that Anya said, "Yes" that makes this scene impactful. Anya could have easily said the exact same words, at normal volume, with a smirk on her face, and nobody would think twice about it. Damian would have immediately understood that she was teasing him. And anyone overhearing their conversation would have thought the exact same thing.

But that isn't what happened. Because Anya was serious in that moment. With a genuine expression on her face, she says, "Yes" and then she whispers her secret to him.

And that is what shocks Damian. That is what causes him to freeze.

In that moment, he's able to sense her sincerity and hear the truth in her words.

His gut reaction is to believe her, whether it's because it's Anya or because of how she said it. It isn't until he has a second to think and his brain kicks into gear that he starts to notice the disparity between what he knows to be true and what Anya is telling him. In a split second, he questions this, and then ultimately rejects the notion that she could be telling the truth.

Why?

The obvious answer would be that what she's told him does not line up with what he knows to be true of reality. The rational and logical part of his brain overrides his heart and his gut, ultimately recognizing this disparity and forcing him to reject Anya's claims.

However, they are at a young enough age that it wouldn't be uncommon to easily believe in "impossible" things like magic or superpowers. So, there's also a chance that it goes a bit deeper than this.

Perhaps this sudden display of sincerity and truth from Anya didn't line up with her typical behavior with him. He's not used to seeing that side of her, and as a result, his mind resorts to him thinking that she's lying to him. He thinks that she's just teasing him. Not only because that's what he expects from her, but also because the only other alternative would be for him to admit that they've just shared a true moment of openness and transparency between them.

Anya's whisper implies, "this is only for you to know." As a defense mechanism, Damian's brain decided that it was more likely that Anya was teasing him than it was that she was being vulnerable with him in that way.

Another detail from this moment stems from the fact that this reveal takes place while they are dancing together. Partner dancing is an activity that requires cooperation and teamwork. At first, we see Damian and Anya struggle with getting the hang of it, but eventually they start working together.

That, in itself, seems to be a fairly good representation of their relationship with each other. However, even more so, it follows the flow of their conversation in this moment. It isn't until they start cooperating that they start to open up to one another.

And the pinnacle of the conversation -- the reveal -- happens at the exact moment when Damian dips her. Not only does this make for a picturesque panel, but it is also a symbolic visual of what's happening.

Dipping your dance partner inherently requires a level of trust. The person being dipped has to literally put themselves in their partner's hands. Depending on the dip, they are giving up varying levels of control and safety over to their partner. They have to trust that their partner won't drop them, or bring them too close to the floor; they have to give up their balance and trust that their partner can hold the weight that they're giving up. And their partner takes on the responsibility and burden of that person's trust (as well as trusting that the person that they're dipping does not throw themselves around carelessly).

And here, in this scene, despite the bickering we see Anya and Damian do, we see that there is at least that small amount of trust between them. Anya trusts Damian to dip her, and Damian trusts Anya to be dipped.

But underneath the surface level, the fact that Anya whispers her secret to Damian while he's dipping her reinforces the idea that she trusts him with that knowledge. In that moment, she gave up some of her own control and safety, and placed it in Damian's hands. Only his. Her whisper implies, "this is only for you to know." And he's been given the responsibility and burden of deciding whether to hold it, or drop it.

[rileyglas]

The List ~Pt. 8 - Change~

Alastor (Hazbin Hotel) x Reader

Summary: Fueled by alcohol and emotion, you muster the courage to confront Alastor about his feelings toward you. During a heated discussion, more truths come to light. The rules you’ve lived by for so long begin to change as you learn more about who you are meant to become. This will be a night to remember.

Themes: The usual angst, this part does contain SMUT, mystery, sassiness, cursing, fluff, actual plot, Lucifer is a cunning shit, slow burn, and of course 18+

3.9k Words

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 7.A Part 8 (You're on it!) Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12

**sentences in italics are internal thoughts of the reader

You freeze standing in front of the door to the radio tower. A million questions run through your mind. A million scenarios play out. A million possibilities of what you were to expect in the next few minutes. It was second nature by now to prepare for the worst. You deliver three loud bangs against the wooden door that echo through the hall. Every logical thought screams for you to leave but the liquor rushing through your veins keeps your feet planted.

No response. There’s not even a shuffle on the other side. Should I knock again? Maybe he went to his room? You raise your hand to knock again when you hear the click of the lock and knob turning. 

The figure before you is almost unrecognizable. Of course it was Alastor but his usually clean pressed suit was replaced with wrinkled slacks and a button down, mostly undone. His hair disheveled in every direction and his eyes had black circles underneath. How does he look even worse than earlier?

“Alastor -” you breathe in shock. 

His eye twitches at your voice, “Leave.” he tries to close the door. 

You slam your palm against the door to keep it open, “No!”. I didn’t make it all the way up here just to leave without a fight. A snarl crosses his face. He steps aside to allow you to enter. Walking in you see an unusual mess of paperwork along with the rest of his suit pieces thrown frivolously around the room. 

“To what do I owe the pleasure of such a late night visit dear?” he sneers as he locks the door behind him. And just like that, every conversation you planned on the way up suddenly leaves your mind. Wait shit…no no no not the blank brain.

“I’m waiting.” he growls, stepping closer to you, annoyed by your lack of reason to be there. You turn away from him and blurt out the only things your alcohol fuzzed brain allowed, “He wants me to leave here to go stay with him. He promised he would protect me and keep me safe and I don’t know if I want that and his touch feels so wrong and – and - all I wanted was to run to you.” You wince from how horribly jumbled your words came out.

A warmth runs up your back and you feel Alastor on your neck. The smell of liquor taints his breath. You stand quietly, bracing for his retaliation. “Please….say something.”

He places his hands on your shoulders. Every muscle tenses from his touch as he speaks, “He wants you to stay with him? To cage you within his own walls?” 

“Yes.”

“Did you tell him all your little secrets?” he continues with an unsettlingly calm tone. “Y-yes.”

“Did you enjoy his hands on you? His lips against your skin?”

A lump forms in your throat as you shake your head, “N-No.”

Alastor walks around you to stand at his desk, looking out the tower window. “Didn’t we agree you wouldn’t leave the hotel without me?” His voice is smug, exuding his usual radio filter.

Is he stupid?

You scowl, frustrated by his sudden cockiness, “That deal was broken when you decided to be a self-serving, ignorant asshole.” 

“Oh my dear, I don’t know how you’ve managed to climb the ranks like you have. Your emotions make you weak, make you sloppy. I have much to teach you.” He says coolly still facing the window.

Oh, okay so he is stupid.

You choose to ignore his comment. “This was a mistake.” you mutter just loud enough for him to hear. Turning on your heel, you head back to the door and reach for the handle, but black tentacles spring up to stop your exit. What the hell!? "Don't do this Alastor." you warn through gritted teeth.

“Come here, please.” There’s suddenly no static, no ringing. You stand your ground and try to leave again only to be pushed back by his dark appendages. “Please.” He repeats, bleak and emotionless. Rolling your eyes with a sigh, you walk across the room and stand next to him, keeping your gaze out the window as well. A familiar comfort washes over you being this close again, but the ache in your chest outweighed any relief. You stand together in silence. Both looking over the city for a long while.

Hesitantly you speak, barely rising above a whisper, “You’re wrong you know. Sure, there’s sadness, depression, anger, selfishness – those weaken the soul. Break you down more than any fall into Hell.” You feel his eyes turn to you, but you stay locked forward, “I would never expect you to understand, but there are some emotions that can empower even the weakest souls. That is how I’ve climbed.”

Rule #4 T̶̷̸̸̸̸̶̵̴̸̶̴̶̷̴̶̸̸̸̵̷̵̵̡̝̙̰̓̌̈̚u̴̶̴̵̷̵̷̸̴̵̴̶̴̵̴̵̷̷̴̸̸̶̶̬͍̯̓̎̈̑ͅř̴̷̷̷̵̴̶̴̸̶̶̶̸̵̴̴̴̷̵̵̴̴̷̲̼̭̱͛̏͠n̶̸̵̶̷̷̴̷̵̷̴̵̷̵̸̶̷̸̴̶̷̴̴̛͓̝͎̱̈́̆̐ ̶̷̷̸̶̷̸̶̷̶̵̴̸̸̴̸̷̷̴̶̵̴̵̦̥͉͔̎͐̾͆ỳ̷̶̵̸̷̵̶̵̵̸̶̶̷̷̷̶̶̸̵̷̶̸̴̥̜̝͆̈̕͜o̴̸̵̶̵̷̶̸̶̴̵̵̴̸̷̶̴̴̶̵̷̴̷͖̯̥̟̍̾̒͠ú̵̵̷̶̴̴̴̷̴̵̶̸̵̵̴̴̶̴̵̷̷̸̵̳̣͔̳̽͊͌r̸̵̴̶̶̶̴̸̸̷̶̵̶̴̸̶̷̵̴̴̶̷̴̬͚̳̜̔̉̍͝ ̸̵̷̶̵̴̵̸̸̶̶̶̸̶̸̶̸̵̸̷̶̷̸̠͚͓͆̈́͌̕͜ẅ̶̵̶̷̸̷̷̸̸̷̷̵̵̸̶̷̴̸̷̷̶̶̴̛̮͓̖́̏̀͜e̴̷̴̴̷̵̴̸̸̵̶̵̶̴̶̸̴̸̸̸̷̷̴͉̮͉͓͑̏̈̐ą̵̶̸̶̴̶̶̵̴̶̴̵̶̴̵̶̵̵̶̸̷̸̶̮͍̱͗͆̚͝k̵̶̶̸̶̴̵̴̷̵̵̴̸̴̴̷̷̸̶̷̸̵̷̺̻̯̜̅̉͒̈́n̷̶̵̴̸̵̷̴̸̴̷̵̵̵̴̶̴̶̶̸̶̶̴̰̫͔̺͑͂̇̍ȩ̴̴̵̶̸̷̸̷̵̷̶̴̵̴̷̷̷̶̸̵̶̶̶̭̹̙͐́̔͘s̸̷̸̶̶̵̷̶̶̶̷̸̶̷̴̵̸̸̵̸̸̸̷̳͔̦̼̐͂̉͌ş̶̶̷̴̵̷̷̸̸̵̷̴̷̸̸̶̸̸̷̸̷̶̵͚̠̺̉͂̒͝ ̵̵̵̷̵̵̶̷̴̵̵̵̷̵̵̷̸̶̸̴̴̶̵̨̟̬̣̇̓̂͝i̷̸̷̵̶̶̴̵̶̶̵̸̸̸̸̵̶̴̸̵̸̵̸̥̦͈͛̾̂͜͝ṉ̷̶̶̸̶̷̸̶̷̷̷̵̶̶̴̸̴̸̵̵̷̶̴̣͓̳͂̉̿̓ț̴̶̴̴̴̷̸̷̶̴̸̶̴̶̷̸̷̷̷̵̵̸̵̨̪̩̍̒́̐ò̵̵̴̶̷̶̷̷̴̶̶̶̶̶̸̷̶̴̶̷̵̵̴͔̭̙̿̈́͌͜ ̶̶̵̸̶̴̷̷̵̸̸̵̶̴̷̵̸̷̴̵̷̵̷̢̹̖͍̊̄̀̓s̵̴̷̸̸̸̵̴̵̶̴̶̷̵̸̸̷̷̸̷̷̵̷̙̮̭̰̀̽͋̓ẗ̷̵̷̷̷̷̶̵̶̴̸̷̷̵̸̵̸̴̵̴̷̴̸͎̗͉̹́̇͌͝r̷̸̷̶̴̶̴̶̸̵̸̷̶̴̶̴̶̷̶̶̵̸̸̮̭̺̘̀̃̍͆ȩ̷̶̴̵̴̴̴̴̷̸̵̴̷̴̷̴̵̷̵̷̸̴̷̭̤͙͒̂̇̈́n̴̴̶̵̷̵̵̷̵̸̷̴̴̵̶̶̵̴̷̴̶̷̵̢͙̪̩̈́͊̔͘g̵̴̶̴̶̷̷̶̵̴̸̷̶̶̴̴̶̷̶̴̷̵̵̝̘̩̪͒͋̕͝t̶̸̸̷̸̵̷̵̵̷̵̵̶̸̸̴̷̸̴��̵̴̶̳͚̘̪͐͑͝͝h̵̶̸̷̶̴̷̶̸̵̷̵̸̷̴̴̵̴̷̸̵̴̸̡̭̝̤͂́͆̿

He holds his gaze as another long silence passes. In the past his stare always felt heavy, as if he was trying to find every flaw or insecurity you could possibly have but tonight, he didn’t burn into you. Tonight he was soft and present.

“I think I’m beginning to understand such sentiments.” He mutters. “Look at me.”

You shake your head and look to the floor. “I can’t play this game with you. It was never just about power to me. I need you to realize that.” The last few days you cried so much you didn’t think you could produce any more tears, yet here they are again, stinging just behind your eyes.

“I had every intention of keeping us nothing more than mutual partners, to only feed from the power we could create. I did what was necessary to keep you close.” Alastor gently takes your hand, intertwining your fingers in his, “But I never expected — I - I didn’t think — This is not a game to me.” 

He doesn’t get it. Your hand jerks away from his. “You have a shitty way of making me believe otherwise.”

A frustrated grunt leaves his chest, “I knew the moment Lucifer met you and felt the power you held, he’d try to take you away. His reaction from seeing us together made it all the more obvious. As much as I hate to admit it, that insolent King is far from stupid.”

“You actually think he feels threatened by me? Or you?” You shake your head in disbelief, “It’s Lucifer, THE fallen angel…the fuckin’ devil himself! He doesn’t need anything. Why would he bother being so open, s-so vulnerable? The man practically crumbled to me. He even compared me to…to Lillith.” “How bold of him.” He grumbles unamused, “Do you really think he would say such things to someone he didn’t know could – “

“He kissed me, Alastor. He kissed me like - ” 

“Like he loved you?” he scoffs at the statement. You watch his body grow with rage, “You want to talk about playing games? Are you so blind to not see he’s the one playing you!? You’re weaker than I thought falling so easily to someone like him.”

Hot tears flow down your face, though you can’t decide if it’s out of anger or hurt. “I’m not weak!” 

“Then start acting like it!” His eyes begin to flicker black and red as static floods the air, continuing to grow into his demon form. 

“It’s not weak to want to be wanted by someone who doesn’t have intentions to….just use me!” You find yourself screaming at the demon, flames starting to surround you. Why can’t he see past his own selfishness…

Alastor goes quiet as he comes down from his form. He beams an arrogant smile at your tear-soaked face, “Silly girl, he wishes to keep you in his castle. To keep you as his pet. He might not need your power but if you think he actually wants you without some ulterior motive, you’re naive and foolish.”

“FUCK YOU!” Having had enough berating, you turn away to leave but his large claw catches your arm to pull you back into him. “What Alastor!? What else could you possibly have to say to me!?”

He leans against his desk and pulls your body between his legs, “Do you not remember what I said the first time we made a deal? Together, you and I could become more powerful than the King of Hell himself.” You tilt your head, “Okay and?”

“Use your head for once! What all powerful being would be willing to risk the possibility of being overthrown? Angel or not, he isn’t invincible. He can’t hide his fear of the potential we possess.” 

The lightbulb finally fires in your brain. Of course... 

Rule #1 B̸̶̵̵̷̴̴̷̶̶̶̨͎̈́ę̴̶̸̷̵̷̸̵̸̴̴̜͊̋ ̸̷̴̸̶̷̵̷̴̴̴͔͙̈́͠o̸̸̸̵̸̷̵̷̶̸̸̲̟̐̀p̶̸̸̴̸̴̵̵̵̴̵͍̞̒̂e̵̴̴̵̸̶̸̸̷̵̶̩̊̑ͅň̸̴̸̶̶̵̴̴̴̶̶̥̕͜ ̴̴̸̴̵̷̷̸̷̶̴͇͙̐̎t̸̷̸̴̵̶̷̴̴̴̷̡̝̂͆o̵̵̴̴̴̷̴̶̸̶̸͚͉̍͌ ̵̶̸̷̶̵̵̸̶̷̸̛̱̗͝t̸̵̷̷̸̶̴̴̷̴̸̗͎̎͑r̸̵̴̴̶̶̵̸̴̴̷͙̣̉̑ǘ̵̴̶̸̸̴̸̶̷̷̸̯̦̓s̸̸̶̶̵̸̸̶̵̸̴̩̰̍̿ṯ̷̶̴̶̸̵̷̴̴̴̴̛́ͅ,̸̷̸̶̸̵̵̴̴̶̵̡͍̈͑ ̶̴̷̴̸̷̵̵̴̴̴̣̤̾͝b̸̵̶̵̵̸̵̶̴̴̶̛̜̹̀u̵̵̶̵̷̷̸̶̸̷̵͈͈̎́t̵̸̷̴̶̵̵̶̷̶̵̡̞̔̚ ̴̸̴̷̷̷̶̷̵̷̶̞̯̋̚n̴̶̵̷̴̷̷̴̶̴̶̳̮̎̈ȩ̵̶̴̵̷̴̵̸̶̵̴͍̀̑v̵̷̸̸̸̵̴̵̷̶̴͔͗͝ͅe̴̷̷̵̵̵̵̸̸̵̵̡̤͋̀ř̵̴̸̵̷̵̸̷̵̶̴͈͘ͅ ̴̸̷̶̵̷̶̸̵̶̵͖̟̔̃d̷̷̵̷̴̶̸̷̶̵̵͈̘͐̔o̷̸̵̷̴̵̵̵̶̸̵͕̙͊̌ ̴̴̴̵̷̷̸̶̵̷̴̜̜̅͘s̷̴̴̵̶̵̶̴̵̸̷̬͈̏̍ò̴̵̴̸̸̶̸̶̶̴̶̫̠̀ ̴̴̷̴̶̸̷̴̵̸̶̯̼̃̓b̷̷̴̶̶̷̶̴̶̵̶̘̹̐̈́l̷̵̸̸̵̵̴̸̷̵̴͎̫͂̉i̷̷̸̶̸̶̵̵̶̵̷̤̪͗̾n̶̴̷̷̷̶̵̶̵̸̶͉̺͑̚d̵̶̵̵̵̴̷̷̸̵̴̖̠͐̉l̶̷̸̸̷̸̴̵̴̵̴̖̘͆͌y̶̶̵̷̵̴̴̴̸̸̵͇̆̾͜

You hang your head in embarrassment by the horrible realization. If you could shrink down to the size of an ant, you would. I should have known better… “He wants to keep us apart so we have no way of rising to power…he wants control. He knows what’s possible, doesn’t he?”

Alastor stays silent but his eyes give you all the answers you need.

You bury your face into his chest, furious with yourself for not seeing it sooner. “I’m so stupid. He got me to trust him and…I told him so much…I showed him…shit…he knows.” Alastor wraps his arms around you tightly. You feel his chest rise and fall with a deep sigh.

“You’re not stupid. I should have told you the morning of his visit instead of -.”

“No - I allowed my own desires to cloud my voice of reason. I want to help…to protect those who can’t do so for themselves. But fuck, for once it was nice to feel wanted for who I was, not just what I could do…” you admit sheepishly, surprising even yourself with your words.

Alastor’s hands affectionately cradle your face. His thumbs softly wipe the tears that remained on your cheeks, “I want you. My body aches and pulls to you. I want to be powerful with you. I know I’ve made you feel like you were nothing to me when in reality, that couldn’t be farthest from the truth.”

“Then say it.” You say plainly as your eyes dart between his. He cocks his head trying to understand your demand. “Tell me the truth. Look at me, swear on your mother’s soul, and tell me the truth.” You needed to hear it from him. You need the words to leave his mouth.

He lets go of you and stands up straight, “Husker talked with you, didn’t he?” 

Uhg Husk isn’t going to hear the end of this…

Frustration bubbles in your chest, “Don’t pin this on him! You just said -” 

His lips press into yours forcefully and you melt into his arms. You’ve craved this feeling for so long that you didn’t dare reject him. Static begins to pulse through your body like never before. Opening your eyes, you see pink and green light surrounding you both. My power has never radiated like this with him. It only should only happen when — oooh fuck I get it now…  

Rule #2 Ḑ̸̵̵̴̴̴̴̵̷̷̸̴̷̴̸̴̴̷̷̵̷̫̩̼̃͐̃͐͜͝o̵̴̶̷̸̶̶̴̸̶̵̷̴̶̷̸̷̴̷̴̷̞̗̣̟̖͐͂̽̊͐n̴̶̶̷̸̸̴̵̷̵̶̵̸̵̷̴̶̸̴̴̸̻̤͍̺͋͐̀̈́̂ͅ'̵̴̵̶̴̵̵̸̶̸̸̷̷̶̵̷̵̵̷̴̶̢̫͖̱͑̆̽̌́͜t̶̴̴̶̴̶̸̶̴̶̸̵̴̴̴̴̷̶̵̵̷͕̼̦̠̘̽́̾̄̈́ ̷̷̶̵̸̶̵̶̷̸̸̵̴̸̸̵̸̷̶̶̶͉̹̰͙͔̈́̂͐̆̌b̶̵̴̸̷̸̷̴̷̴̵̸̴̵̶̴̸̷̸̵̸̲̝̖̦͚͗̿͊̎̌ȩ̸̵̴̶̵̸̵̴̴̷̸̴̶̵̴̷̸̷̵̴̵̩̦͎͇̃͌͐̔̕ ̷̶̶̸̸̶̶̴̶̵̷̸̴̸̶̶̶̷̷̸̶̹̬̙͎̲̉̈͆͆̏a̸̴̶̶̴̵̸̷̶̴̷̴̴̸̷̷̵̶̷̷̶̙̣̹͍͙̒̏́͘͝f̸̴̷̶̸̴̶̸̴̴̶̶̴̶̶̷̶̶̸̸̶̨̡̧̻̯̐̓̐͑̈r̴̵̶̴̸̷̵̸̸̵̸̸̷̶̷̷̵̶̸̷̴̭̩̪̞̻̈́̄̆̔̎ả̶̸̵̵̶̶̴̸̸̴̷̶̶̷̶̶̴̵̵̶̶̢̡̦̖̠̾͑̾͂i̷̶̶̷̸̶̵̵̶̴̸̴̴̴̸̴̷̸̸̷̵̪̩̜̗̦͂̔̂̓͝d̸̴̸̸̸̸̶̵̴̸̶̴̵̸̶̷̴̶̶̶̵̰͚̪̺̥̒́̏̍͠ ̵̶̶̸̵̶̴̴̶̶̸̷̸̵̸̴̵̸̶̸̶̧̰̠͎̪͋̋̒͋̿ẗ̸̵̸̵̸̸̴̸̵̷̶̷̷̶̸̸̷̴̷̸̸̳͇͕̜̟̒̓͌̈ȍ̸̵̶̷̴̸̸̸̷̸̴̵̵̸̵̵̴̸̴̶̷̖̳͔̭̖̄͊̐̆ ̷̸̶̴̷̶̵̸̵̶̷̵̴̶̸̶̸̴̸̴̷̲͎̩̣͂͛̂͜͝͝ṣ̴̶̴̸̸̴̴̶̴̶̵̶̶̴̵̵̴̶̵̷̵̨̠͔̮̑͂͗̑̔ḫ̶̵̶̶̵̴̴̶̸̵̶̴̸̷̵̶̴̷̶̵̶̡̨̻̼̿͛̈́͌͘ö̶̶̵̴̶̸̵̴̴̴̴̷̷̴̷̷̶̴̴̶̴̞̲͙͉̬́̈́́̓͝w̸̴̶̶̶̵̸̸̷̶̵̴̴̷̶̴̶̵̴̶̶̝͎͓̼̤͐̆͊͊͐ ̴̶̶̷̶̶̴̴̶̷̸̴̷̸̶̵̷̵̵̶̵̡̻̪͍̙̈́̇͗̂͐y̶̸̶̵̸̴̸̶̴̷̶̵̸̷̶̷̶̸̸̴̵̦͕̲̱̥̾͗͊̋͠o̴̵̵̴̴̵̷̴̸̶̸̵̶̷̷̴̴̸̷̶̷͈̻͚͙̔̎̀̎̕͜u̶̴̸̶̷̶̵̵̴̸̶̸̵̴̷̸̶̵̷̸̵̻̥̩̭̿͗̐͆͌ͅr̸̷̴̵̶̵̸̶̴̷̶̵̴̴̵̵̸̶̶̷̵͖̙̼̝̝̃̽̊͗́ ̴̷̶̵̸̴̸̵̵̷̸̶̴̵̵̵̶̶̶̵̷̧̥̥̫̭͑̈̆̔̈p̵̴̴̸̶̶̸̴̶̴̸̷̸̶̵̷̸̶̴̶̷̺̰̪͎͓͋̆̄͆̕o̷̶̴̸̸̶̵̸̴̵̸̷̸̴̵̴̴̵̵̵̸̹̟͔̱͉͆̀̐́̈́w̶̸̵̵̵̸̶̷̸̵̴̸̶̴̷̴̸̷̶̵̸̼̣̘̖͐͋͑̂͝ͅȅ̷̷̵̶̶̵̶̵̶̷̴̸̷̵̵̷̸̷̸̶̵̛̼̩̭͓̍̅͊ͅr̵̸̸̶̶̷̶̶̸̶̸̸̸̷̶̴̸̶̴̴̷̨̻̹̪̽͛͒͝͝ͅ

He breaks the kiss to rest his head against yours, panting from the sudden passion, “I swear…on my darling mother’s soul…I love you.” 

“Why didn’t you tell me before?” 

Alastor’s face twists with a mixture of regret and embarrassment, “I’ve made it a point to be ruthless and unwavering. I thought showing anything more would label me weak. When I returned to the city feeling such foreign urges…I thought I was going mad.” You smirk trying to hide the pure joy rushing over you, “Is that Alastor or the copious amount of liquor talking?”

“Probably both.” He chuckles through a smile you swear could split his face in two if it went any wider. Your hand runs under his open shirt and across his chest playfully, “Oooo what other confessions can I get out of the great Radio Demon?” 

Alastor huffs at your sudden confidence, “Oh - ho darling don't push your luck. Terrible of you to take such advantage of me in this state.” Your lips curl into a half-hearted smile, but doubt continues to flood your thoughts, “You say you love me - but your words have failed me before.” 

He grimaces, “After seeing you with…him…the pain of possibly losing you consumed my mind. I went to see a good friend of mine who was able to put things in a new light. I believe the words she used were, ‘Words are cheap, but actions, they speak for the truth’.”

Time to test my luck as usual. “Then show me.” 

He presses a kiss to your forehead and trails down your face, stopping at your lips. “Are you sure?” he asks breathlessly. You nod and push against him with enough force he has to brace himself against the desk. He swiftly returns your passion and draws you flush with his body. As he deepens the kiss with his tongue, you feel him spin and lift you up on his desk - slotting himself between your thighs.

Your hands dance up his body, impulsively undoing the last few buttons of his shirt before pulling it off his shoulders. You break the embrace as you feel the scars that riddled his body. “How -?”

“I didn’t become who I am without some loss, my dear. Does it repulse you?”

“Never.” Entranced, you ghost across each mark making him shiver. Desire crashes over you seeing his body react to your touch. Your fingers continue to flutter over his skin to the small tufts of red hair that trail down his stomach. Stopping at his belt, you lift your eyes to his, “This isn’t like before Alastor. I can’t handle any more disappearing or deals or secrets. Are you ready for that? Are you certain I am what you want?” Your words seem to plead rather than question him.

He pulls your hips into him as he lays you back on the desk, trailing kisses down your jaw. “You’re all I’ve wanted for a long time darling.” he purs into your ear, voice dripping with lust. Is this really happening?

You let out a yelp when his claw abruptly slices down your shirt. He’s too impatient, too deprived of you. His eagerness continues to fuel the heat growing between your thighs. He chuckles as the buttons of your shirt scatter across the room, “Nothing a trip to the tailor can’t fix.” 

He begins to pepper kisses across your collarbone, down your sternum, and over your stomach, pulling soft whimpers from your lips. A devious smile crosses his face as he unbuttons your pants and slides them off your legs along with your underwear. He stands himself between your thighs once more, “Utter perfection.” he breathes. The sudden sound of his belt being undone and ripped from its loops sends goosebumps across every inch of your exposed skin. Last chance to - no…I want this….we need this…

You feel his hard warmth start to slide between your folds. He groans from contact, “It seems you’re already begging for me, darling.” Propping yourself on your elbows, you look down at his length as he teases your entrance. Alastor notices your worried expression, “Take a deep breath and relax, I’ll go slow.” He slowly begins to push himself into you and his mouth falls on yours, begging to catch every moan of pain and pleasure.

Your walls clench from the sudden but welcomed sting. He stills to allow your body to adjust to his size. “Too much?” he asks. You shake your head, “No, keep going.” He continues to push into you, hissing into your neck as he bottoms out against you. You can’t remember your previous experiences from when you were alive, but you were positive you’ve never felt this level of fullness or satisfaction.

You wrap your legs around his waist and tangle your hands into his hair, giving a firm pull at the base of his antlers. “F-f-fuck –“ he mouths while rolling against you, craving friction but not daring to push until he feels your body relax. You buck into him as a silent plea to keep going. He begins to pull out at an agonizingly slow pace, groaning gravelly praises each time he drives back inside, “That’s it.” “Deep breaths cher.” “Give in to me.” He was completely controlled, each stroke deep and intentional.

“Al –“ You cover your face to muffle your moans, surprised by how dazed you’re already becoming. Each thrust you feel him hitting a spot that sends mind numbing electricity through your body. He moves your hands away from your face, “No hiding - it’s just you and me.” His voice is laced with a sweetness you’ve never heard from the demon before.

It isn’t long before the tension in your lower stomach builds. He draws you up against him and grips one of your thighs, putting you in a position that allows his pelvis to grind into you as he quickens his pace. Your fingers dig into his arms to steady yourself. 

You throw your head back with a guttural moan, your noises are pure music to Alastor’s ears. He can’t resist breathing sweet words into your neck, repeating how good you look like this, completely filled by him, no one on your lips but him. In between his admirations, he runs his teeth across your throat, nipping and sucking little marks to claim you that much more. 

His gentle whines across your skin bring you that much closer to release, “Alastor…please…more…”. Any self-control he was holding onto snaps at the sound of your pathetic pleas. Feeling him pull out completely, you protest under your breath. He turns you around and bends your body over the cold wood of the desk. A dark groan rumbles in his chest as his hand slides up your spine and his fingers thread into your hair. He pulls you back gently to lean into your ear, “You want me to show you how much I love you, cher?”

Without waiting for an answer he jerks your head back to crash into you from behind, filling the room with an unholy mixture of your cries and the sound of your bodies connecting over and over. Your back arches from his grip pulling you deeper into his thrusts. Any control he had with you before is long gone. The demon loses himself as your walls tightly massage around him and your sweet sounds feed his desire. 

His free hand wraps around your body. You cry out again feeling his fingers start to massage your aching bud. Your nails dig into his desk and tears begin to stream down your face from the intense stimulation. “D-don’t…p-please…I’m.. – ” you pant nearing the edge of your high. Looking back, you watch his antlers grow.

“Say…my name….a-a-AGAIN!” he stammers between breathy grunts. Unable to hold back any longer, you bow back into him, feeling the tension in your stomach finally snap, “Oh God, Alastor!” you gasp. Every muscle trembles beneath him as your body welcomes the long awaited release.

He plunges deeply once more to feel you spasm around him. “There’s no God here, cher.” He growls as he sinks his teeth into your shoulder, making his name fall from your lips once more. Hearing you scream his name pushes him over into his own resolve. His body stutters, filling you with every drop of him. You bask in his whimpers as he rides out the high.

Your body collapses on the desk. Alastor lies on top of you kissing every bit of skin he can reach. You hiss as he runs his tongue across the fresh blood trickling from your shoulder, “No one will have the pleasure of tasting you again.” His chest rumbles against you. He continues to drag his lips across you, remaining inside to take in your body just a little longer. For the first time in weeks your mind is blank, entirely present in the moment, drinking in every second of his body being one with yours.

“Stay still dear.” he commands, grudgingly pulling out and away from you. The cold air from his sudden absence makes you shudder. You let out a breathy giggle at the feeling of his warmth trickling out and down your legs. Alastor returns and starts to run a cloth between your thighs, “I admit, I quite enjoy you like this.” 

“What? Vulnerable and naked?” you tease.

“Unequivocally mine.”

You turn around to wrap your arms around his neck. “Say it one more time for me?” He rolls his eyes but happily obliges to the request, “I’ll say it a million times if I need to - I love you.”

“I love you, Alastor.” Rule #3 K̸̷̵̴̸̸̸̵̵̵̵̸̷̶̶̵̷̴̶̶̴̫̩̻̗͚̇͆͑̈́̀e̴̶̷̷̶̷̷̶̵̵̶̵̵̶̶̶̵̴̷̷̷͙̪͔̫̣͛͐̎̀͝e̵̸̷̵̷̴̸̸̸̷̷̷̴̵̶̴̷̴̵̵̴̢͈̬͍̺͗̌̒̆͝p̵̷̷̴̷̸̶̶̵̵̷̷̴̶̶̷̷̵̷̸̸̧̛̦̤̼͚͋̅̄͝ ̷̸̸̸̴̵̵̷̵̶̷̴̵̷̸̷̵̵̴̴̸̺̳͚̩̤́̓̈́̇̌t̷̶̸̴̶̴̵̴̷̸̴̸̸̷̸̸̸̶̶̶̵̤̣͙̫̹̃̉̌͂̂h̴̸̸̶̷̷̶̶̵̸̷̶̵̵̵̴̶̴̷̶̴̡̘̯͖̝́̽̌̌̏ȏ̵̴̸̷̷̷̵̴̴̶̵̸̸̷̸̶̵̶̶̸̸̱͍̞̉̓̚͜͝ͅs̶̵̴̷̸̸̵̸̵̵̷̶̵̴̷̶̷̷̴̵̴̢͙̹̯̗̾̒̃͒͝ȩ̶̴̷̵̴̸̴̸̶̴̵̵̵̵̸̵̷̵̵̴̵̧͇͙̠́̑̈́̊̄ ̷̵̵̸̵̷̷̶̶̶̷̸̸̴̴̸̵̸̵̸̸̧̦̘̖̺̔̀̂̌͛y̸̵̶̶̴̶̸̴̸̴̶̸̷̶̴̶̸̸̸̴̸̢̘̼̗̰̌͒̕͝͠o̸̴̶̸̵̶̸̷̴̸̶̶̷̴̸̶̷̴̷̷̶̡̨̖̭̠̊̾̆̓͗ų̵̶̸̵̷̶̴̸̵̵̷̴̵̶̶̴̷̶̷̶̷̙͕͚̰̀͆̔̉̌ ̴̸̷̶̴̷̴̶̴̶̶̵̸̸̸̵̸̴̴̴̴̤͍̤͖͎̐̐̑͆̕l̶̸̵̶̶̷̷̸̷̵̶̴̶̴̶̵̸̶̷̴̶��͇̦̩̰͋̈͊̈́́o̸̶̸̷̶̶̸̴̴̶̴̶̷̶̵̸̴̶̸̸̶͕̜̟̥̼͐̐̀̈́̐v̸̶̴̸̸̷̶̷̷̵̵̷̴̶̸̷̸̶̵̴̴̟͙̩̝̭̒̒̋͘̕e̵̶̵̶̴̸̴̶̶̷̵̷̸̶̶̴̵̶̷̴̵̺̬̩͔̺̓̾͆̕̚ ̶̷̶̷̴̶̶̸̷̷̴̴̷̴̷̶̴̵̸̸̴̨͈̣̩͕̉͋̎̿̀c̶̸̶̵̵̴̴̴̷̵̷̶̷̴̴̴̴̷̸̵̵͓̳̘͓̬͐̐̈́̌̈́l̸̶̸̷̴̷̴̷̸̵̷̷̵̴̷̷̷̵̸̵̴̢͎͍̻̈́́͊̚͜͠o̸̵̷̸̷̷̵̸̴̴̶̸̷̷̴̶̸̷̷̸̶͇̻̣̯̖̐̿̕̚͝s̴̷̸̷̷̴̵̴̴̶̵̷̵̸̴̴̵̶̷̵̷̛̠͍̳̥͔͆̐̃͝ë̶̵̴̷̵̵̷̷̸̸̸̴̶̴̶̸̵̴̷̴̷͈̳̙̟̥́͑̔͘͠

Green and pink light reflects off the walls once more as you kiss him, bodies vibrating from the connection. He grins against your mouth, “Your power grows darling. You’ll need to learn to control it if we are going to keep this up.” 

You groan at the thought, “I’ll add it to my list of things to do tomorrow.”

Alastor nods and walks over to a chair where a few of his shirts were laid over the arm, pulling one on himself and tossing you another, “This should suffice long enough to make it back to our room.” You slide the shirt over your shoulders and let out a sigh of relief seeing it was long enough to hit mid-thigh. Last thing I need is someone in the hall seeing more than they want.

Without thought you inhale the intoxicating smell of his cologne that still lingered on the material. Every worry you had could wait until tomorrow. Right now, you selfishly only wanted to live and breathe Alastor. You begin to button the shirt but freeze at the realization of what he said, “I’m sorry, did you say our room?”

A hand presses against your lower back, “You don’t actually expect me to let you too far from me again, do you cher? Your things have already been moved. Now, shall we?” He beams as he picks you up, carefully minding that you remain covered. Like second nature your arms slink around his neck, “I can walk you know, don’t give yourself that much credit over what just happened.”

He starts to make his way out of the tower, “I wouldn’t be so smug if I were you dear. I’ve been without you, craving you, for a long time. This is to save your energy for when we make it back to the room.” His tone was playful, but you could hear the underlying threat.

Two can play that game. You mischievously start to gently bite and kiss his neck while whispering taunts in his ear, “Looks like the scary Radio Demon has lost his self-control.”

That comment combined with a solid bite to his neck is his breaking point.  Before you make it to the door the world spins out and back in. You feel yourself fall back forcefully against the silk sheets of his bed. Looking down you see Alastor hungrily climbing over you with feral eyes. He growls through a toothy smile, “Want to say that again love?”

I don’t think I’m getting any sleep tonight. 

Tag List (Let me know if you would like to be added!)

@rl800 @fairyv-ice @looking1016 @martinys-world @sirens-and-moonflowers @alastorssimp @alastorsgirl48 @mysterisumone @phamtasic @ohnah2022 @eris-norwega @kaylopolis @littlebluefishtail @little-slyvixen @laudrawin @qu1cks1lversb1tch @diffidentphantom

[alexawynters]

Scarlet Whispers pt. 8

Gif not mine, as always

Trigger Warnings: Smuttttttt. Horribly written smut.

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Female!Reader

Rating: M. Minors DNI

Masterlist with parts 1-7 here

Chapter Eight

Translations: котёнок - Kitten; malyshka - baby; lyubov - love; dorogoya - darling; I probably missed some… I should have probably been doing this the entire time, no? Eh… My b.

A/N: Its uhhh.. My first time writing smut for the public so uh… be gentle pls? Lol. Lemme know how it went. Writing dialog and smut makes me cringe haha. This was also written while I was in the hospital. Is it bad that the 5 day stay was almost a vacation compared to life? Haha, living the dreeeaammm. Someone pls hit me with their car or something so I can go back and have 0 responsibilities for another week. Promise I won’t sue 😛

Once again, edited while floaty. Apparently that’s the only time I can get the motivation to open my laptop. In my defense, I’m currently in the middle of a move and starting a new job so pls forgive my laziness. I’m a tad overwhelmed. It’s finnnne. 

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During your time at the aquarium with Wanda, you hadn't noticed how late it had gotten. Logically, you knew it was around dinner time because you both had just eaten, but you didn't realize until you both entered the dimly lit cottage that it was so dark outside. Despite the long day you’d had, you weren't ready to go to bed just yet. Body thrumming with an unfamiliar energy, and you could tell it stemmed from Wanda's hand still holding onto your waist. Now that you were home, it would be socially acceptable for her to let you go, but instead, she chose to linger.

Never one to enjoy having others in your personal space, regardless of if you were touch starved, you were thrilled to discover that you didn't mind the witch being so close to you. In fact, the mere thought of being separated from her made your stomach roil with anxiety. Looking at the redhead next to you as you traversed the hallway towards your room for the evening, a new kind of craving overcame you. This one was different from the hunger you had experienced just before dinner, and you realized that you couldn't get enough of the witch’s touch and presence.

Reaching your shared room Wanda finally moves to separate from you, and as she heads opposite from you, her hand falling away, you make a split-second decision. Well. Decision was being generous. More accurately you allowed your impulses to take over, unable to think logically - you couldn’t let Wanda get too far. Not that there was anywhere for her to go in a bedroom you both shared, but your brain wasn’t exactly running on all cylinders at this time.

“Wait!” 

You don’t know what, or even if you were thinking, knowing only that in the scant few feet the witch was away from you, your whole world felt like it was collapsing. A lightly calloused hand shot out as you turned to grab her hand again, and in your exuberance, you accidentally ended up yanking the woman towards you. In an unexpected feat of grace surprising both of you, you managed to catch Wanda. Despite her velocity, you were able to use her momentum, spinning both of you. A small jolt of pain wracked through your bones as your back landed harshly against the smooth wall, with Wanda safely in your arms. Chests heaved for air, both of you having fully expected to collide, ending up in a heap on the floor.

After the initial surprise wore off, both women giggled, though neither made a move to separate. “What is it, Y/N?” the older woman asked. Amusement colored her gaze, mixed with something else you couldn’t quite decipher. You were still learning new facial expressions to this day. 

“I-” You started then stopped, trying to assemble your thoughts and determine just how vulnerable you were willing to be. “Thank you, Wanda. For today. For… everything. This was..” you trailed off, unable to find the words. “Everything.”

You hoped Wanda would understand what you meant by that even if you yourself weren’t quite sure just yet. What you were sure of is that you wanted to return to Wanda at least a fraction of the care and devotion she had shown you in all this time. You knew you didn’t want her to walk away, heart aching at the concept. What you didn’t know was what you wanted to do next, you hadn’t exactly gotten that far, but you couldn’t stomach the thought of being apart from her.

The redhead’s gaze softened at your words. “You don’t need to thank me, lyubov. You deserve so much, and I just want you to be happy.” 

The words “with me” went unspoken, though she was dying to let them out. Instead, well-manicured hands lifted the tips of her fingers to gently push some fallen strands of your hair from  your face, as she studied you curiously. A feeling you both were on the precipice of something settled firmly within the witch’s chest. Wanda was fairly confident she knew exactly what that something was, but she wouldn’t plunge you into anything you weren’t yet ready to fall into.

Though certain in her assumptions, Wanda was unable to clearly read your surface thoughts. A jumbled mass of emotions, each thought no more than fleeting before another took its place, your mind was a whirlwind. The next steps had to be taken by you, and if you weren’t up for that yet, the redhead was content with where you both were at this moment. 

A palpable tension filled the air, conveying an unspoken awareness that something transformative was about to occur. Anticipation lingered in the atmosphere, creating a delicate blend of nervousness and excitement. There was an understated, magnetic attraction that drew you closer to Wanda. Completely unaware as you were, enthralled by the alluring softness of her lips which stoked a longing within you to know if they felt as velvety as they appeared, you were unconsciously learning forward.

It was a moment of breathless expectation, where time seemed to stretch. The world had fallen away, leaving only the two of you suspended in the beauty of the impending inevitability. Eyes finally connecting with Wanda’s, a silent, mutual understanding was shared, and in that moment, you made a decision.

”May I…?” your voice a husky tremor, thick with emotion.

Never had Wanda found you more endearing than in that moment. Your innocent consideration that you would need to ask her permission after everything. As if she hadn't been waiting for this very moment for so long. As if this wasn’t what she had been waiting for since first discovering the Darkhold, and all the possibilities of a multiverse.

“Please, Y/N.” The witch’s reply was all but a breathy whisper.

As your lips and hers finally connected in a gentle, exploratory kiss, an electric current seemed to pass through their bodies, igniting a fire within your souls. It was a moment of pure magic, a culmination of all the emotions and desires that had been building between you both. Breaths mingled, blending together in a perfect harmony of passion and longing.

The softness of the kiss spoke volumes, revealing a depth of connection that you were certain words could never fully capture. A tender exchange, filled with a delicate balance of vulnerability and trust. Each touch, each movement of Wanda’s lips against yours, was deliberate, as if she was savoring every precious moment of this newfound intimacy with you.

With every passing second, the world around faded away, leaving only the two of you enveloped in a bubble of pure bliss. Time seemed to stand still as you explored this uncharted territory together. A feeling as if something inside, you hadn’t known had been missing, was now perfectly slotted into place. Home.

When it came to kissing you, Wanda marveled at the stark contrasts between your Avenger variant, and you. While your other variant was self-assured, often taking command of a kiss with practiced skill, you, on the other hand, were gentle and tentative. It was evident that you were willing to let Wanda take the lead, which she found incredibly empowering, almost addictive. She knew she should probably take this first kiss slowly for you, however, your submissiveness was simply too delicious for her to pass up such an opportunity.

Long, slender fingers came to rest just under your jaw, firmly holding you close, Wanda using her body to press you harder against the wall, as if trying to merge your two bodies into one. A gasp escaped you at the length of the witch’s body pressed so intimately against you. Wanda, ever opportunistic, took advantage of your open mouth to deepen the kiss, her lithe tongue swiping softly at the seam of your lips in askance. 

You couldn’t even fathom a moment where you would ever deny Wanda this request, opening your mouth to grant her the access she desired. Her skillful tongue sensually slid against yours, eliciting a barely suppressed whimper from you. With a little coaxing Wanda was able to entice your tongues to engage in a seductive dance, leaving you breathless and heady. 

Eventually, the kiss broke, leaving both of you craving more. It had opened the door to a world of possibilities, and in that moment, everything changed. The bond between the pair of you had deepened more than you could know, and more than Wanda had hoped for. Despite initial reservations, your heart knew then you would follow Wanda anywhere, irrevocably tied to the witch forever. There was no one you wanted or trusted more.

While trying to catch your breath, no words were spoken. Taking this moment, your intrusive thoughts began creeping in because of course they were. Desperately you hoped the woman wouldn’t view the kiss as a mistake, praying that you measured up to your superhero counterpart. That you were truly what she had been looking for all this time, even if you weren’t anything special.

You would do anything to have her lips on yours again, and briefly a thought occurred to you that this woman could murder you, and you would probably thank her for the privilege. Therapy, maybe you should ask Wanda if she could get you in to see a therapist, because that wasn’t concerning at all. 

It wasn't in you to feel ashamed just then though, not when the very thought resonated in your soul. Gods, was this what you had been missing your entire life? And it had been right under your nose, for ages you had been unknowingly depriving yourself, hellbent on self-sabotage.

As you finally caught your breath, the witch gazed at you hungrily, causing a shiver to race down your spine.

"What do you want, detka?" Wanda asked, voice sultry. She tilted her head as if curious, but in reality, she was relishing in your disheveled appearance, eyes raking over your blown pupils, and kiss-swollen lips. So responsive for her, and this was only a kiss. Your first kiss with her, to be specific. Wanting to completely ruin you, it took every ounce of self-restraint for Wanda to wait for your answer instead.

Chest heaving, your brain struggled to pull together enough brain cells in order to provide her with an answer. When you finally spoke, your voice had a throaty quality you had never heard before.

”You. I want you.”

Green eyes, the color of jade, sparkled in such delight they could have practically illuminated the room with their vibrant glow. As you stared into her mesmerizing gaze, you got lost in her presence. Your mind was a myriad of thoughts, unable to focus on anything else. Every word she spoke, every movement she made, had a profound impact on you. As if the witch had cast a spell over you, weaving her magic effortlessly, and you willingly succumbed to her enchantment, eager to be under her captivating influence. 

A mischievous smile played upon her lips, adding an air of mystery to her already enchanting demeanor. The grin hinted at the hidden depths within her, the playful intentions that lied just beneath the surface. So, as Wanda’s mischievous smile lingered, you couldn't help but be drawn further into her web of enchantment, willingly surrendering yourself to the metaphorical spell she had cast.

"Oh, lyubov, will you let me ruin you?" she asked teasingly, her voice filled with impishness and a hint of excitement.

Swallowing nervously, you felt desire building deep within you. Your experiences in this matter were limited, but you trusted the former avenger all the same. Still, you had a sneaking suspicion that whatever Wanda had in store for you would likely test your limits, even if you had no idea what those were yet. Eagerly, you nodded, ready to throw yourself headlong into this unknown, trusting the witch implicitly.

The moment her silky lips met yours once again, a hunger ignited within her, surprising both of you with its intensity and passion. Wanda pulled you close, her fingers curled in your hair, keeping you in place as she plundered your mouth. You could do little but let her lead the way, trying not to embarrass yourself with how much she was turning you on. Her sharp teeth tugged on your lower lip before biting down hard enough to draw blood. A pitiful whine was barely restrained by you as Wanda lapped at the new wound she had caused.

Deciding to test your boundaries during the kiss, the redhead gently wrapped her other hand around your throat. Not tight enough to cut off your oxygen supply, but the pressure did restrict some of the blood flow to your brain, leaving you in a deliciously foggy haze. A breathy moan escaped you, which Wanda eagerly swallowed as you gladly ceded control of the kiss to her. Pride out the window, you were no longer capable of trying to withhold any sounds she could draw from you. Wanda found it delightful that so far you were proving to be the perfect little котёнок for her. The redhead eagerly anticipated discovering what other surprises you had in store for her.

The other hand not on your neck moved from your hair down to the first button of your shirt and hesitated. “Is this okay, Y/N?” She asked, voice surprisingly soft for someone who currently had one of their hands wrapped around your neck.

Sluggish thoughts hazy with lust, you nodded with what would have probably counted as an embarrassing amount of enthusiasm. Having someone as gorgeous as Wanda in front of you, asking for your consent, you found you couldn’t be bothered by your eagerness. You were a simp, and you were fine with that. Anything to get more of Wanda touching you.

The former Avenger grinned, finding you utterly adorable. She was charmed by how needy you were for her. Unable to help but revel in the power dynamics between you, relishing the opportunity to challenge your blissed-out mind and watch as you struggled to comply with her demands. It was a delightful game for Wanda, and she was going to have fun training you.

Before she could continue though, the witch wanted you to be absolutely sure. Regardless of how long she had waited for you, if you weren’t truly ready, Wanda didn’t want to push you. She wanted all of you, everything you had to give, but if you still weren’t ready, weren’t sure, she could wait. Wanda would wait forever if she had to. 

 “Lyubov moya, if you want me to stop at any point, just say the word, and I’ll stop immediately, okay? Full stop, I promise, and I won’t be upset with you.” she insisted, voice thick with longing as her nose grazed gently across yours in a reassuring manner. 

Even now, Wanda was always putting your safety and happiness as her top priority, endearing her evermore to you. How could you have ever doubted that this woman had anything but your best interests at heart? The purest of intentions?

Knowing it was a bit over dramatic, while you appreciated her reassurances, if the witch didn’t do something in the next few seconds, you felt like you might combust. Releasing a needy whine, you hoped to convey your desperation to Wanda who only chuckled at your behavior. 

“Relax, malyshka, I’ll take good care of you, I promise. But first, I need you to use your words, darling.” The hand on your throat easing its grip a little, allowing more blood to your brain, giving you back some of your intellectual capacity.

With Wanda’s body covering yours, you petulantly ground against her in the hopes of achieving any sort of friction, causing her lips to quirk upwards in an amused smirk. You weren’t going to get out of this until she had confirmation of your understanding, and if she happened to tease you into a petulant, writing mess in the process, well, that was just the cherry on top.

Giving in, you let out a keening whimper. “I understand Wands, please. Just touch me. Please!”

A wolfish grin overtook Wanda’s face at your begging. Green eyes locked with yours, and she could see the desire and longing in your eyes, mirroring her own. The way you looked at her, with a mixture of vulnerability and trust, made her heart flutter with a sense of joy and fulfillment. You were willing to surrender yourself to her guidance, to allow her to take the lead and shape you into the person she knew you could become. That kind of implicit trust and faith you had in her shot her arousal through the roof.

With each passing moment, Wanda's excitement grew, knowing that she had the opportunity to train and mold you into her perfect little котёнок. She relished the thought of all the fun games that lay ahead, confident in her ability to guide you towards your full potential. Your willingness to submit to her desires fueled her passion, making her all the more determined to own you completely. This power was the ultimate high, and she didn’t think she could ever get enough of it.

Her hand moved from your throat to wrap around your waist with a firm yet gentle grasp, pulling you closer to her in an undeniable display of ownership. The touch of her hand on your hip sent a surge of adrenaline coursing through your veins, igniting a fire within you that you had never experienced before. It was a possessiveness that transcended the boundaries of mere desire, a possessiveness that spoke volumes about the depth of her emotions for you.

Far from being suffocating, her dominance was a testament to the strength of your bond. A tangible manifestation of the passion that burned between the two of you, it was a flame that only grew stronger with each passing moment. Her assertive touch was a declaration, a proclamation of her utter devotion and fierce protectiveness towards you.

In that instant, you couldn't help but be overwhelmed by the intensity of her feelings. A sensation that both thrilled and comforted you, it was a magnetic pull that drew you closer to her with each passing second. Feeling as if you were the center of her universe, the focus of her unfaltering attention, and you visibly preened under her attentiveness. Your hands which were clenching the bottom of her shirt held fast, unwilling to let her move more than a few inches away.

Now that she had your consent and had subtly established your place with her, Wanda's svelte hands returned to the task of unbuttoning your shirt. Unable to resist the allure of your lips for long, she passionately kissed you once again. As your lips moved against each other with a sensual rhythm, Wanda swiftly unbuttoned your shirt. Before you knew it, your shirt was completely undone, revealing your torso to her exploring hands. A shiver ran through your body as her slightly cool palm pressed against your abdomen for the very first time, the gravity of her body pressing you further into the wall. While you had felt her touch on your skin before, it had never been this intimate, this exhilarating.

As her hand glided over your bare skin, heat coursed through your body, the sensation sending shivers down your spine. The flames within you steadily stoked by every caress. Your breath hitched as her touch lingered, tracing delicate patterns along your abdomen.

Growing desperate you deepened the kiss. Your hands instinctively reach for her, moving from the hem of her shirt to tangle in her hair as you pull her closer. The magnitude of the moment was almost too much, feeling the desire consuming you from within.

Wanda's lips slid against yours with a fervent hunger. Her roving hands continued their journey, tracing every curve and contour of your torso with an almost reverent touch, sending pleasure coursing through your body. As your lips moved in perfect synchrony, heightening your senses, it left you yearning for more. The room was filled with a heady mix of desire and anticipation, as you both gave in to the draw of the moment..

Lost in the haze of passion, you couldn't help but give yourself completely to Wanda's touch. The way she explored every inch of your body with a delicate yet possessive hand left you breathless, craving more of her commanding aura. It was a dance of pleasure and surrender, a symphony of sensations that left you craving her touch like a drug. You had never needed anyone or anything as much as you needed Wanda to continue doing whatever she wanted to you.

As the kiss broke, both of you gasped for air. Wanda, still breathing heavily, leaned back to take in the sight of your newly revealed skin, her eyes darkening with want. Though never having been confident in your own body, often choosing to cover up, to hide in your self-consciousness, the way Wanda was looking at you now though left no doubt she liked what she saw. Yet still your insecurities plagued you, especially now that you were no longer covered up and there was nothing for you to hide behind.

The witch didn’t need to read your mind to know where your thoughts were going. The expression on your face, the way you tried to curl in on yourself made it plain. Voice thick with desire, Wanda needed to reassure you. “You’re so fucking beautiful, Y/N. Don’t ever let yourself believe otherwise.”

Though you didn’t truly believe her words, her tone and the way she held you like she couldn’t get enough was almost capable of convincing you in and of itself. You decided then that throwing yourself into this was the fastest way to get out of your head. Throwing caution to the wind, you slammed your lips against Wanda’s again, desperate for more of her.

Impatient, you couldn't resist the urge to guide Wanda's hands lower, craving for her to touch you more. Deft fingers brushed against a particularly sensitive spot, sending a surge of pleasure  shooting through you, and tearing a quiet gasp from your mouth. Your body responded eagerly to her every caress, arching into her hands, silently begging for more. Emboldened by your response, Wanda's touch grew daring, her kisses to your neck pressing harder leaving red welts that would purple over by tomorrow. Her marks on you would tell all who you belonged to. Her fingers began exploring your body with a newfound confidence. The touch was both gentle and possessive, leaving you with the utter clarity that she wanted to mark every inch of you as her own, even the parts of you no one else would ever see.

The room was filled with the sound of your shared breaths, heavy with desire. Feeling the urgency building within you, your body pressed closer to Wanda's, seeking to ease some of the pressure within. Her touch was all at once overwhelming yet not enough.

Determined to elicit every delicious sound she could from you, one of Wanda's hands finally moved to your breast. Gently she cupped it while her thumb teased you by gliding around your areola, avoiding your hardened bud. She took great enjoyment in your whimpers and gasps as she teased you. If she had it her way, she would keep you like this, never giving you quite what you wanted. Wanda would ease you into that eventually though. For now, this was enough.

Eventually she had mercy on you, letting her thumb lightly graze across your nipple. A deep, throaty groan emanated from within you, your hips bucking against hers, unbidden. Taking the opportunity you had presented her with, Wanda slotted her knee between your thighs, applying firm pressure just where you needed it most. You whispered an exhaled curse as your head slumped forward onto the older woman’s shoulder. Your grip on her tightened, the urge to just rut against Wanda’s leg nearly overpowering what little was left of your rational mind.

Wanda could feel the subtle grinding of your hips against her leg, and she encouraged it, pressing harder each time you arched towards her. The witch grasped your hips firmly, helping to set your rhythm as you desperately sought more friction between the apex of your thighs.

For someone who hadn't even taken off their pants yet, you were surprisingly worked up, but you were far too focused on chasing your high to be overly concerned about it. Sensing how close you were, Wanda pulled away from you, calling forth a keening whine from you. The older woman chuckled softly at your desperation. Her raspy voice next to your ear made you shudder. 

"Patience, dorogoya, I don't want you to come just yet unless it's in my mouth or on my fingers."

Wholly unprepared for her words as you were, they almost single-handedly threatened to ruin the witch’s plans as you nearly came on the spot. Wanda was aware that you had likely never edged before, and while she should have shown some mercy, she found no enjoyment in that prospect. Her intention was to have you so drunk for her to the point where you would become a helpless, trembling wreck, willing to do anything she desired just to reach that peak. Then, she planned to repeatedly push you off that ledge so many times that you would be a boneless, quivering mess for her by the time she was done with you.

As her words hung in the air, you felt a mixture of anticipation and hesitation. This was a new territory for you, one that you weren't entirely sure of what you were getting into. But as you looked into Wanda's eyes, filled with desire and a touch of mischief, you couldn't deny your feelings. You wanted to experience everything she was willing to show you, to give yourself fully and trust in her to guide you through this journey of pleasure.

With a deep breath, you nodded, your voice barely above a whisper, "I trust you, Wanda."

A smug smile played on Wanda's lips as she gently held your cheek. "Good," she purred, her voice laced with satisfaction. "I promise you won't regret it. Now, let’s take this to the bed.” She didn’t want your first time together to be rutting up against a wall.

Wanda grasped your hand, leading you the remainder of the distance to your shared bed. Once there the witch assisted you in removing the remnants of your clothes, gently pushing you backwards onto the bed. Before joining you, she took a moment to admire your naked body, as you looked up at her with a combination of desire and excitement. You were uncertain of her intentions, but the fact that you were willing to trust her filled Wanda's heart with joy.

With a gaze that could only be described as ravenous, she studied you and quietly uttered a curse. "Fucking exquisite" she husked, hoping to drive home her words from earlier.

Squirming under her intense gaze, you blushed deeply at her compliment. No one had ever called you that before, not in your entire life. The longer you laid there, alone under her scrutiny, the greater your need for Wanda grew. Before you could ask her to rejoin you, she was already removing her own clothes with purpose. You waited with bated breath, as Wanda revealed her body which you swore could have been sculpted by Michelangelo himself. Honestly, you thought it was a little unfair for someone to look so perfect. You felt absolutely privileged to be in this moment with her, that she had chosen you of all people to witness her glory. No one you had ever seen, in person or even on tv could compare. Wanda was a goddess, and you wanted to worship at her altar.

The redhead knew she was an attractive woman, but your loud thoughts were giving her quite the ego boost. She had you right where she wanted you, but Wanda would be damned if she allowed your self-deprecation to continue. There was not a single doubt in her mind that you were equally deserving to be here with her.

“Your thoughts are loud, malyshka.” She almost giggled at how red your face turned when she called you out, reminding you of her powers, and your gaze dropped.

 “While I’m flattered, darling, you need to know.” Wanda said with certainty as she began crawling up the bed towards you. Once she had crawled up the length of your body, the witch trailed her fingertips along your thigh, and up your torso to your face. Curling a graceful finger under your chin, she tilted your face upwards until you made eye contact.

“You are stunning, lyubov moya. There is no one else I would want to be here with right now. Not in the entire multiverse, believe me, I’ve looked. No one but you. Can you trust me on that, Y/N?”

Green eyes searched Y/E/C for any sign of lingering insecurity. With the witch looking at you so earnestly, your doubts faded into the background. They would likely never be completely silent, but in this moment, those thoughts were just white noise. Speaking was currently too difficult for you so instead you simply nodded at her words.

No longer able to hear your uncertainty as loudly, Wanda felt you were ready to continue. “Good, but just to make sure, I’m going to show you.”

Before you could ask what she meant, Wanda kissed you again. Her hand, which was previously under your chin, caressed down your chest and cupped your breast. She gave it a gentle squeeze, causing a soft sound to escape your throat.

As Wanda's touch re-ignited the flicker of pleasure within you, her lips and tongue traced a path of heated kisses down your neck, leaving a hot trail of saliva behind. Her skilled hand continued to explore your body, evoking an oeuvre of gasps and moans. Eventually, her lips settled on one of the places you desired the most, enveloping your nipple.

Once Wanda's lips closed around your hardened bud, a jolt of pleasure shot through your body, causing you to arch your back in response. Her tongue teased and circled the sensitive bud, sending ecstasy pulsating through your veins. While Wanda continued to lavish attention on your aching nipple, her other hand trailed down your body, caressing and exploring every inch of your skin. The combination of her skilled touch and the intense pleasure coursing through your body made it difficult to think or focus on anything else. 

Her hand continued its exploration, gliding over your skin with a feather-light touch. Every brush of her fingertips, each flick of her tongue against you sent your arousal to new heights. Your senses were completely consumed by her, the world around you fading once again into a distant blur.

Completely at Wanda's mercy, you found yourself basking in her every touch and caress. The pleasure she was bestowing upon you was the best high you had ever felt, addictive and irresistible. Your mind was filled with a primal need, a craving for more of the pleasure that only she could provide.

Wanda switched breasts, moving to lavish attention on the other one ensuring it didn't feel neglected. Her hand continued to tease your flesh, raising goosebumps to form on your skin. 

Unable to sit still, your own hands came up to tangle themselves in the redhead’s hair. Head held firmly in place by you, Wanda's hand slid lower, exploring the wetness that had pooled between your thighs. Svelte fingers teased your entrance, and you gasped as the anticipation nearly undid you.  Back arched, begging for more, you whispered a “please!”

Helpless to deny your plea, Wanda's fingers dipped inside you, your slick allowing them to slide in with ease. You moaned lowly as she began to move her fingers in a slow, deliberate rhythm, curling and stroking against your most sensitive spots. The pleasure built within you, radiating through your body like an electric current.

Your hands tightened in her hair, pulling her closer to you as your hips instinctively rocked against her hand, seeking deeper pleasure. Wanda matched your movements, her pace increasing, driving you closer to the edge. Her lips found yours once again, swallowing your moans as the pleasure consumed you.

The room was filled with the sound of your shared breaths, the wet, almost obscene sound of her fingers moving inside you, and the symphony of your pleasure. Each stroke of her fingers sent you spiraling further into this rapturous euphoria, your body trembling with desire.

Lost in the carnality of the moment, you could feel the heat building within you, the pressure mounting until you were teetering on the edge. Sensing your imminent release, Wanda's fingers quickened their pace, driving you towards oblivion. Moans growing louder, they mingled with the sound of your ragged breaths.

“Are you gonna come for me baby?” She asked, voice dripping sweetly with lust, not letting up the pace even a little. The woman knew what she was doing to you, and couldn’t resist drawing it out just a bit. 

Beneath her, you squirmed and bucked in place, desperation eeking off you in waves. You hadn’t exactly had many partners to begin with, and you had certainly never been especially vocal with any of them. Wanda couldn't have you being all shy on her now though. She wanted to hear each and every sound she could possibly draw out of you as proof of how good she was making you feel, her fingers hitting that special spot deep inside of you that had always been just out of your own reach.

“Now dorogaya, use your words. Are you going to be a good girl and come for me? If you can’t answer me then I guess I should stop.” Wanda slowed her pace and you all but wailed your frustration.

“Yes, yes I’m going to come. I’m so close, Wands, please don’t stop!”

Truthfully that should have been enough for her but sadistically she wanted to push your boundaries further still. She smirked at your pleas. 

“I won’t stop, Y/N, but you can’t come until I give you permission.”

You didn’t think you had ever been on such a precipice of euphoria before. It was right there if only Wanda would let you. Part of you wanted to ignore what she said and let yourself go, but the part of you that yearned to be good for her won out in the end. 

You begged pitifully. “Please Wanda, please let me come! I’ll be your good girl, please, just let me come!” You would say anything the woman wanted as long as she would let you finally finish.

It was positively sinful how your submission made Wanda feel. She wanted to experience you like this every day for the rest of your lives. The tremor of your voice as you begged, how quickly and completely you accepted her commands, it was positively sublime.

“Well when you beg so prettily for me, how can I resist? Be a good girl, Y/N - come for me.” Her fingers curled deliciously, mercilessly hitting your new favorite spot. 

With Wanda’s permission, the world shattered around you as your orgasm crashed over. Your body convulsed with exquisite hedonism, every nerve ending alive with sensation. Wanda's name were the only words from your mouth as you rode the high, your orgasm careening over you in a tidal wave of pleasure.

For Wanda, feeling your wet heat tighten around her fingers, practically refusing to allow her to pull back to even help you through your peak, was so perfect. You didn’t know it, but it was enough to make Wanda topple over the edge alongside you, her head dropping to the crook of your neck while she whispered sweet nothings in your ear, struggling to bring you gently down from your high. 

As the aftershocks of your release subsided, Wanda gently withdrew her fingers, her touch lingering for a moment before she pressed a soft kiss to your lips. She held you close, her presence a comforting anchor as you came down from the heights of pleasure. You whimpered at the feeling of emptiness after being so joyously full.

Breathless and sated, you nestled into her embrace, feeling a profound sense of contentment and connection. And as you lay there, wrapped in each other's arms, you felt that this was just the beginning of something beautiful between you both. You had made the decision to trust Wanda with your body, heart, and soul, and in this moment, everything felt so right.

Wanting to return the favor, and make Wanda feel as good as you did, but as you tried to shift in her embrace, the former avenger simply held you tighter. Feeling rejected, you wilted in her arms. Perhaps you had already failed to live up to her expectations, so much so that she didn’t even want you to touch her. How heartbreaking to have failed so soon, to never get the chance to prove yourself.

Voice soft, Wanda alleviates your fears. “Not tonight, darling. Tonight was all about you. Rest with me for a little while, detka, I just want to hold you. May I do that, Y/N?”

Murmuring a quiet assent, you settled into the comfort Wanda provided. You both laid there, basking in the intimacy you both had just shared, feeling content and happy. It wasn’t long until your eyes began to droop, signifying you were about to nod off.

Sensing how close you were to sleep, the witch gently roused you. She giggled at your grumblings for the disruption but insisted you both needed to clean up. Shaking your head, you whined as you tried to hold her in place with you, unwilling to let her go for any reason. Wanda  had to actively restrain herself from cooing at your adorable stubbornness.

“Come on now, it’ll be just a few minutes and then we can go back to sleep, okay darling?”

Petulantly you shook your head, and Wanda full on belly laughed, holding you tightly to her while she did so. Her laughter was infectious, and you couldn’t help but chuckle as well, knowing you were being a bit ridiculous.

Eventually, both of you calmed down, and Wanda pulled away from your embrace, mentioning that she would be right back. You let her go, but you pouted the entire time she was in the bathroom. After a few moments, you could hear the sink running, and then the witch returned to you with a warm, damp washcloth in her hand. With an unprecedented level of care, Wanda cleaned between your legs, removing any trace of the night's activities, while being mindful not to overstimulate you.

“There we go, detka. All clean. Let me just throw this in the sink, and we can go to sleep.”

Doing exactly as she had said, Wanda quickly returned, swiftly maneuvering her way into the cozy bed beside you. With a few gentle movements, she skillfully arranged the soft sheets to envelop both of you, creating a warm and comfortable cocoon.

Once she was finished setting up the sheets, you wasted no time in crawling back into her arms, burying your face into the divot where her neck and shoulder met. You felt like you had been through the wringer, but in the best way. When she had gotten up to clean you both, with her no longer being in your arms, your emotions had run all over the place. Now all you wanted was to be as physically close to the redhead as possible, to reassure yourself that she wasn’t abandoning you after such a vulnerable act.

Wanda was not at all opposed. Quite thrilled in fact, and as she held you, one hand came to gingerly trace random shapes along the side of your face, whispering nonsensical words of love and solace. Pillowy lips placed a soft kiss to your forehead.

As you drifted off to sleep, feeling safer and happier than in your entire life, you heard Wanda whisper in her native tongue. You were curious, but too far gone to ask her what she meant.

“я так люблю тебя, дорогая. (I love you so much, darling.) I promise I will always keep you safe, and I will never let you go.”

A/N 2: ... Why do I have a higher word count for a chapter with smut than any other chapter? .... Reasons. We're going with "reasons". So uhhh... yay? nay? Yeet myself off a cliff? Also if anyone wants to be added to the taglist just lemme know in the comments.

Taglist: @dorabledewdroop

[mysterious-moonstruck-musings]

Closed Position: Week 4 (Jive Part 2)

Closed Position Masterlist ||| Main Masterlist Dieter Bravo x OFC (Katarina)

Series Summary: Dieter Bravo, now sober, was looking to change his bad boy image after hitting rock bottom. His team hoped that having him join the nationally televised family friendly dance competition, Dancing with the Stars, would be a good first step, if they can keep him out of trouble. 

Katarina Stamos expected her last season as a professional dancer on the show to go the same as it had for the past thirteen seasons. That all changed when she was partnered with the infamous Dieter Bravo. 

Dieter and Katarina are reluctantly thrown into their partnership and must learn to work together to succeed in the competition. In the process they form a deeper connection beyond the dance floor that neither anticipated.

Chapter Word Count: 16.6k

👉 Warnings: Themes dealing with intimate partner violence (not from Dieter), past alcohol abuse, and past drug abuse. There will be fluff, tears, spicy language, and smut. This will be a slow burn. Read at your own risk. Dieter Bravo comes with his own warnings.

Chapter Quote: I’m so fucked.

Kat's POV On my drive home from the diner, my thoughts were only of Dieter. His mood had been all over the place this week. I really had been concerned about him slipping up and felt more relief than I probably should have when he mentioned his therapy appointment. At least he seemed to be handling things the right way. I couldn’t figure out what suddenly had made him so upset, but I felt like it had something to do with me. He had been more distant since the show on Monday, and I didn’t understand why. 

When Dieter came into the dance studio on Wednesday, I could tell that Alec’s presence was affecting him. Having both men in the same space with no one else around made me nervous. It was obvious that Dieter didn’t care for Alec and vice versa. The tension between the two of them was so thick, I was concerned about another confrontation. Luckily, Alec didn’t stick around long. 

However, the tension was still there even after Alec left. I couldn’t take it anymore. I had to ask Dieter what was going on. I figured it had something to do with me giving Alec another chance. I knew how Dieter felt about the way Alec treated me, but for a brief moment, I couldn’t help wondering if there was more to it - if maybe he was feeling something for me too. Something more than concern for a friend’s safety. 

It pissed me off when he said he was disappointed in my choice, even though he had every right to be. It was hard to hear because I knew he wasn’t wrong. It was a bad decision, and I could already feel the regret setting in. The burst of anger did fuel me to ask what I really wanted to know, if there was another reason he was so upset about it. I knew him well enough to know that he wouldn’t answer it honestly, but he did falter. I briefly considered his response, something about it causing butterflies to form in my stomach. My gut was telling me there was something else, but the logical part of my brain didn’t believe it.  

His pleas that followed to not let it get bad and the burning look in his eyes caused a shift in the tension. I couldn’t fight the urge to touch him, my hand involuntarily reaching for his cheek. He surprised me by leaning into it before taking my hand in both of his. The moment turned oddly intimate, and I wanted nothing more than to tell him how I was feeling, but I knew I couldn’t. It was wrong to be feeling those things for him. I knew that I needed to keep it professional, for all our sake. 

Dieter seemed to return to his normal self after that, which had me questioning things all over again. Surely that wasn’t all that had been bothering him? I worked to brush that thought aside. I was just happy to have him back. Given that the day had ended so well, I wasn’t ready to be away from him. I had missed his light and wanted it to shine on me just a little bit longer. So, I asked him to try the Greek diner with me, which turned out to be a terrible idea. 

The last two hours had sent my thoughts and feelings into a tailspin. Dieter seemed to be opening up to me more and more each time we were together. Tonight felt…different. Not unlike how it felt when I had dinner at his place. He was attentive and maybe even a little flirty. The way he kept looking at me was causing my thighs to clench together under the table. I wasn’t sure if it was just a physical attraction or more. He definitely had me reevaluating things during my whole drive home.

It was already getting late by the time I pulled into the garage. I hadn’t heard from Alec at all, even though he said he was planning to come over for the night so we could go out for breakfast before our rehearsals started the next morning. I was both annoyed that he hadn’t at least texted me and relieved that I might not have to deal with him. I was settling into bed, planning to go down a social media rabbit hole on the Dieterina hashtag when I heard the front door open. I sighed, set my phone on the docking station to charge, then laid down to go to sleep. 

I could hear Alec moving around to get ready for bed, eventually settling in at my back and pulling me against his body to kiss my cheek. He smelled of cigarettes and something else I couldn’t figure out. Something floral maybe? It wasn’t normal and it made my stomach turn. When I only acknowledged him and didn’t escalate things, he sighed heavily then turned away and quickly fell asleep. 

My mind began racing. Was that perfume or something he had eaten or drank? I couldn’t tell and it was sending me into a spiral. I hated having to worry about this. I shouldn’t have to. And did I really have a right to? I wasn’t behaving much better than him today, and the thoughts I had been having were a whole other thing. 

And so what if it was perfume? He had been rehearsing with Lana half the day. It could just as easily be from that. Surely that’s all it was, if anything. Right? I was trying my best to be rational about this and give him the benefit of the doubt, but it was hard. Would I ever stop thinking like this when it came to him? 

It took forever for me to finally fall asleep, but I had managed to calm my thoughts by then. Not that it was a restful sleep. I spent most of the night tossing and turning, plagued by weird dreams that I couldn’t remember after waking. They only left me with a sense of foreboding that I couldn’t seem to shake. 

The following morning, I was in the bathroom getting ready when Alec came in. He hugged me from behind, burying his face into my neck and sighing dramatically. 

“Baby, I’m gonna have to skip out on breakfast. Marc just texted me and asked if we could switch rehearsal times. Something about a sick kid…So, we’re gonna head in earlier than planned.” 

He raised his head, giving me his best sad puppy face in the mirror as he rested his chin on my shoulder. 

I let out a controlled breath, sticking the mascara wand back into the container. No sense in getting ready now. “That’s ok…it’s understandable. It was nice of you to do that for him.”

“Yeah, so I guess imma head out. Maybe we can grab dinner later?”

I nodded, turning to kiss him goodbye. Only, he didn’t kiss me on the lips, he kissed me on the forehead and walked off without a second glance or another word. Something about that didn’t sit right. It stunned me actually. 

After I heard the front door shut, I moved to peek out through the curtains. Alec already had his phone to his ear with a smile on his face as he got into the driver's seat. Something about this felt off. 

I took a deep breath, moving to get my phone from the nightstand. Alec wasn’t a huge fan of Marc, often calling him a stuck up prick because he wouldn’t go out partying with the rest of the guys at all hours of the night. Marc was married and had young kids, so of course he didn’t do that. It was hard for me to believe that Alec would do anything to help Marc out given his feelings about him. Alec wasn’t typically very accommodating to people he didn’t care for. I was also fairly certain Marc usually had evening rehearsals, so he could be home with the kids while his wife was working. 

I pulled up Marc’s contact information and hit the call button. I worked to steady my breathing as the phone rang. Part of me hoped he didn’t answer out of fear from what I would learn. He did answer though. 

“Hey Kat, what’s up?” 

“Hey Marc, sorry to bother you. I just wanted to double check, did you by chance change your studio time for today?” 

“Nope, it should still be our usual evening time slot. Why?”

His answer knocked the air out of my lungs. I knew Alec was lying. I somehow managed to compose myself and quickly think up an explanation. 

“Not a huge deal, they had us double booked, but I think I’ve figured out a solution. I just wanted to check first before calling Dieter with the change.”

“Oh damn, that’s annoying. Do I need to do anything?”

“Na, I’ve got it sorted. You guys should be good.”

“Awesome. Thanks for catching that or we might’ve been sharing.” 

“No problem. I may see you around later. Enjoy your morning.”

“You too. Thanks again! Bye.”

I wasn’t sure what to do with this information. It didn’t necessarily mean he was cheating, but why else would he need to lie like that? I puffed air out of my cheeks, deciding to throw on my gym clothes and go to his place to see if he was there. 

A short time later, I found myself pulling into a parking spot at Alec’s apartment complex. I noticed his car was in its usual assigned space, so I decided to go in. As I was unbuckling my seatbelt, I spotted Lana walking up the steps leading to his second floor landing. I froze, watching as she knocked on the door. A few seconds later, Alec was there, pulling her tightly against him and kissing her with a lot more enthusiasm than he had with me lately. 

It hurt to see it, but I needed to. With the previous incidents, Alec swore he was never physical with those women. I didn’t believe him, but I also had no proof either. This time, there was no denying it. They definitely had something going on and clearly had for some time. 

The oddest mix of emotions was swirling inside of me. There was relief of course, but there was also hurt and anger. I had given up so much for this asshole and this was how he continued to repay me. After letting anger win the battle as the dominant emotion, I sat trying to reason with myself on the best way to handle this. I wanted to confront him, but I was also worried about his reaction. Would he get violent? 

I hesitated, but eventually stepped out of the car and began walking toward his apartment. When I reached the 2nd floor landing, I realized his door was still slightly ajar. The dumbass didn’t even get it shut all the way. As I got closer, I could hear them, on the sofa I assumed, already fucking. I felt sick from the sounds. It was made worse by the words that were coming out of Alec’s mouth; She’s the only one he needs, the only one who means anything to him, the only one he wants…it went on and on. I couldn’t listen anymore, reaching to push the door open with force, causing it to slam into the wall. 

Alec was seated on the couch with Lana straddling his lap, now trying to cover herself with her hands at the sound of the door. I got an eye full as his unprotected dick slipped out of her when she turned to look in my direction. 

I was seething. He couldn’t even wrap it up. He wasn’t even worried about bringing something home to me. Looks like my concerns were valid. 

“Kat…w-what the fuck are you doing?” Alec sputtered, shocked by my sudden appearance. 

I took a steadying breath, determined not to cry in front of him. “I just wanted you to know that I heard it with my own ears and I’m seeing it with my own eyes. There’s no sweet talking your way out of it this time you fucking asshole.”

“Baby, come on. Let’s talk about this…” 

He moved to get up, but Lana pushed him back against the sofa, refusing to get off his lap. Then she turned back to me, a sly smile on her lips. 

“What are you smiling about? He’s your fucking problem now.” 

I turned to leave, overhearing Lana telling Alec not to go after me as I moved toward the stairs. I had to applaud her, at least she seemed to have some authority over him. For now, anyway. In time, he would probably break her down too. 

In an odd way, I felt like that confrontation had taken some of his power away from him. He couldn’t lie his way out of it. There was no way he could twist this in his favor and save face. He wasn’t going to control me anymore. He couldn’t. My chains were broken, and I wasn’t going back. 

After sitting in my car for several minutes, the adrenaline rush was beginning to wear off, and now the hurt was setting in. The things he had said to Lana told me how little he actually cared about me. Why did he fight so hard to keep me around if he didn’t want to be with me? Or had he just been telling her what she wanted to hear? He was good at that tactic. 

I was left feeling like I had wasted the last six years of my life, for nothing. I was suddenly full of grief over everything that I had given up for Alec, and regret for the way I had allowed him to treat me. It was a relief to be done with him, but that didn’t make it hurt any less. I loved him once after all. We had been happy in the beginning and at one time I believed we could find our way back to that. The tears were coming now. I needed to get away from his apartment. 

I backed out of the parking spot and headed home. Once locked inside, I let the tears fall as I crawled into bed and sobbed into a pillow. An hour had passed when I finally checked the time. Realizing that I needed to pull it together and get ready for rehearsals. We were filming today, and I refused to do it looking like an emotional mess. 

After dragging myself out of bed, I moved to the bathroom to examine the damage. My eyes were red and swollen. I applied a warm compress, hoping it would take some of the swelling out. It helped some, but not enough. After washing my face, I worked to put a little more makeup on than I would normally wear in hopes it would make it less noticeable. It seemed to help some. 

I had to rush to make it to the dance studio in time. The camera crew was already there setting up and coming at me with a mic pack as soon as I walked through the door. I did my best to act normal, but from the way Dieter was eyeing me, I could tell he knew something was off. I knew he wouldn’t ask with hot mics on us, so that gave me some reprieve. 

My mood improved as we began to rehearse. Dieter of course found ways to make me smile, like he always did. Things seemed almost normal by the time the camera crew left for the day, leaving us alone for the last two hours of rehearsal time. Dieter did ask if everything was ok since I seemed flustered and was a few minutes late. I lied and said Alec and I had gone out for breakfast, and I had gotten held up by a traffic accident on the way here. I didn’t think he bought it, but he didn’t question me on the topic any further. I hated lying to him, but I wasn’t ready to share what happened. I needed time to process and deal with it on my own first, otherwise I was going to break down into a crying heap if I tried to explain it now. 

Our last bit of studio time went on as normal, allowing me to forget about the whole Alec thing for a bit. Once our time was up, we gathered our things as Dieter shared the latest Zee antics with me. Mentioning that he was heading to the pet store as we walked to our cars to leave. He lingered for a moment after saying goodbye, like another question was on the tip of his tongue, but he never asked it. Instead, he smiled and gave me a quiet, “See ya tomorrow” as he got into his car. 

I was considering my next steps as I left the dance studio. I knew that I probably needed to get checked out since I had no idea what Alec had been up to. I was certain he used a condom every time we were together since I had first found out about his infidelity, but I realized that wasn’t fool proof, and he was a fucking idiot. I also realized that it didn't protect me from all STDs. There were other ways of catching things. 

I was silently cursing Alec as I pulled into the parking lot of one of the local walk-in clinics. It looked fairly empty, which was a positive. I sat there for a moment, trying to prepare myself for what I was about to do. I would have to explain my situation, which meant I would have to finally say it out loud. I just hoped I could keep it together. The fact that I was having to do this made me hate him more than I had ever hated anyone. 

Luckily, they got me in quickly. I gave a urine sample, had an exam, then had blood drawn, and was swabbed in all the places to be tested for every STD possible. I was stoic through the whole process. It was the only way to keep from falling apart on the poor medical staff. I was told it would take 5-10 days to get the results, which seemed like an eternity when dealing with stuff like this. It made me feel dirty and used. I shouldn’t have had to do it, yet here I was. I should have listened to my gut instinct a long time ago. It would have saved me a lot of stress and grief. 

With that out of the way, I finally made my way home. I decided to soak in the tub for a bit to try and relax. I was feeling a little achy, probably because I hadn’t really been taking care of myself this week since Alec had been around. I needed to do better so that it didn’t become an issue. We still had a lot of weeks left to get through.

As I sat in the tub, I started browsing Instagram. Eventually finding myself on Dieter’s page. I had given it a quick scroll when I first followed him but hadn’t looked since. I noticed he had added “Cat Daddy” to his bio which made me snicker. Then, I scrolled all the way back to the beginning. He didn’t have much posted. Based on one of his earlier posts he had removed a lot before he went to rehab. I assumed it was the less than flattering stuff from his party days. 

There had obviously been a shift in him. I could tell just from the few posts from before rehab that were still available. Most of his newer content focused on Zee, plants, and painting, which I loved to see. There were a couple of the same shots provided to us from the show that I had shared, but nothing else.

I caught myself going on a liking spree. I had to force myself to stop before I ended up liking all of his posts. As I scrolled back toward the top, one picture caught my eye. It was a shot from his “sanctuary”, the corner with the leather seats and guitars where we played together the previous week. He posted it the day after I had been there, with the hashtag #MyFavoritePlace. I couldn’t help but wonder if his post was related to my visit. I shook that question from my head. What a ridiculous thought, Kat. 

I was then drawn to a picture of his hands covered in dirt as they potted a plant. He really did have nice hands. They were large with long, thick fingers. The small bullseye tattoo only added to their appeal. My mind momentarily wandered to thoughts of those hands on my body but dismissed them. I can’t go there. If I do, there’s no coming back. I moved on to the next post. I was chuckling at Dieter’s Croc covered feet when notifications started to pop up. 

“bangingbravo1 liked your photo.”

They came in one after another. My liking spree must have prompted him to do the same. The only difference, he did like all of my posts, except for the ones that had Alec in them. OK, Bravo. You made your point. Publicly. He was so unapologetically himself and was not afraid to make his opinions known. I honestly loved that about him, but damn if that wasn’t going to cause some gossip if anyone noticed. 

I hit the little notification bell at the top and turned all notifications on for him without a second thought. I smiled to myself, hitting the ‘message’ button. 

ME: I feel like I’m being Instagram stalked right now…

He didn't keep me waiting long for a reply.

DIETER: I’m pretty sure you were stalking me first, sweetheart. 😉 (wink emoji)

My smile widened, he was trying to push my buttons. Truth be told, I kind of liked it when he did that. 

ME: I told you not to call me that, Bravo.

DIETER: My apologies…Kit Kat.

I rolled my eyes. He was never going to let that nickname go. 

ME: What are you up to this evening, besides liking all my posts?

DIETER: I was painting until my phone started blowing up with Instagram notifications.

ME: Oh yeah? What are you working on?

DIETER: Something new…it’s a secret.

My brow furrowed. What a weird response. He’s usually very open and excited to talk about his hobbies. 

ME: Oh come on, not even a hint?

A picture came through. It was obviously a close up shot of part of a painting. It just looked like swirls of purples, magenta, and black with oranges and yellows at the edge. I couldn’t tell what it was, but I was intrigued.

ME: Those are new colors for you. I like them.

DIETER: Well, I have new inspiration...

Why was he being so cryptic? It was causing butterflies in my stomach again.

ME: And that inspiration is…what?

DIETER: My 🐈 (cat emoji), of course.

Why didn’t he just say Zee? Unless he thought he was being slick with double meanings? Surely not. I held my breath as I typed my reply, then hit send without reading it. 

ME: Your feline or your human 🐈 (cat emoji)?

He started typing, then stopped. It took him a good thirty seconds before he started again. 

DIETER: I’m afraid you’ve hit your question and answer quota for today. My turn. What are you up to this evening?

I snorted, this was about to take a turn. Did I want to go there? I decided to keep it PG, not wanting to make it weird. 

ME: Just trying to relax my aching bones.

DIETER: And how does my human 🐈 (cat emoji) do that? No hints? 😏 (smirk emoji)

My thighs clenched together. He did not just fucking say that. I wasn’t sure how to respond. Were we flirting? I chewed on my bottom lip as I thought through my options. Another message popped up.

DIETER: I’m sorry. That might have been a little inappropriate to say.

He was one hundred percent flirting and now worried he overstepped. Alright Bravo, if you’re gonna go there…then I am too. 

ME: If I give you an inappropriate hint, will you answer my question?

DIETER: That depends on how inappropriate your hint is…

I chewed my lip again, thinking. I muttered a quiet “Fuck it” as I propped my bubble covered legs up on the side of the tub and snapped a picture. It’s not like he hadn’t seen more than that from my costumes. Then again, this implied I was currently naked and wet. 

I decided not to send it through Instagram, instead pulling up his contact info and sending it as a text. I felt nauseous afterward, worried I was misreading things. He was taking entirely too long to respond. The bubbles finally started bouncing, indicating he was typing.

DIETER: I feel cheated. Your toes are cropped out. Your answer is a no go.

I snorted. He obviously didn’t have a problem with it.

ME: Please tell me you don’t have a thing for feet. That’s just gross.

DIETER: I’ll take what I can get. I’m not picky. Besides, you probably wouldn’t say that after one of my foot massages.

My thighs clenched again. Fuck. Why is that doing things to me? Probably because it implies he’s good with his hands…his very large hands.

ME: Are you offering?

DIETER: All you have to do is ask, honey. I’ll do anything I can to help you feel better. 😉 (wink emoji)

Fuuuuck. I can't deal with him. He was sending my mind spiraling straight into the gutter. For a brief moment, I wondered if my vibrator was charged before scolding myself for going there. I was so fucking ridiculous. How did I go from being distraught over my ex cheating on me to this? I needed to chill and get my life figured out before I ruined mine and Dieter’s friendship. 

ME: Well, I hate to cut this conversation short, but my water is getting cold. I’ll see you in the morning?

DIETER: Of course. And for the record, I do have a hydrotherapy tub that doesn’t get cold. You can use it anytime.

DIETER: I swear I’m not trying to be weird with that. I know it helps with arthritis pain. 😂 (laughing to tears emoji)

I laughed, almost tempted to ask if it would fit two people but refrained. I knew he was only trying to be helpful. 

ME: That’s good to know. 😂 (laughing to tears emoji). Go to bed. I’ll see you in the morning.

DIETER: I will do as I’m told. Goodnight Kit Kat.

ME: Goodnight.

I got ready for bed after that. My mind was now jumping all over the place. I realized that I hadn’t heard from Alec since leaving his apartment, which was unusual for him. Normally he would be blowing up my phone with calls and texts. Maybe he knew it was over this time and wasn’t even going to bother to try to fix it. I could only hope that was the case because I didn’t want to deal with him. 

Then my thoughts went back to Dieter. I was so confused about my feelings for him. I wanted him physically, yes. That much was obvious. What I didn’t know was what I wanted beyond that. I wasn’t sure if I could trust what I was feeling. How much of it was real and how much of it was a result of our situation? We were both in a perfect storm of emotions, looking for happiness and somehow finding it in each other through dancing. 

It’s not unusual for dance partners to fall for each other because the physical closeness and intimacy involved does cause the release of oxytocin in the brain. That fact is common knowledge among dancers, and it fuels the long debate about if the dance connection between partners is real or if it’s just a temporary psychological effect from hormones. Is that what was happening here? Would the intense feelings for him fade once the show was over? It was certainly something to consider. 

Granted, I’ve had a lot of dance partners in my life and never felt like this before. It was similar with Alec, but nowhere near as intense and those feelings with him waned over time. However, I could attribute that to his shitty personality and the way he treated me. We still danced together, so in the end that didn’t save us either. 

By the time I finally started to fall asleep, I was more confused and conflicted than ever. I decided that I would just go with it and see what happened. It was really the only thing I could do. It wasn’t like Dieter had expressed interest in anything more anyway. He was in recovery after all and did say he was taking a break from dating as part of that process. So, I was probably getting myself worked up over nothing. 

The next morning, I awoke feeling surprisingly lighter and more relaxed. The prospect of being done with Alec for good seemed to remove a lot of pent up stress and anxiety. Plus, Friday rehearsals typically went pretty easy for us since we had our routine down. It was just about fine tuning with the music now, allowing us to have a little more fun with it. 

When I got to the dance studio, Dieter hadn’t arrived yet. I wasted a few minutes getting the music ready and stretching. Then I checked the time, realizing he was a few minutes late. I was suddenly worried that something might be wrong, he was usually a few minutes early if not right on time. I was reaching for my phone to send him a quick text when he walked through the door with his cell phone to his ear. He looked a little wild-eyed as he said his goodbyes to end the call, but also seemed to be fighting a smile.

Once he was finished, he dropped his bag onto the floor and gave me a cheesy grin. 

I gave him a confused look, “What’s going on?” 

He put one hand on his hip, the other was rubbing his chin. “Well, I got invited to do SNL. I didn’t think that would ever happen again.”

I gave him a toothy smile, “Dieter, that’s awesome. I’m excited for you!”

He held up his pointer finger and grimaced, “Slight problem though…” He paused. 

I raised my brows, waiting for him to continue. 

“It’s for next week. That Gosling dude dropped out at the last minute, and they don’t have a lot of options.”

My face fell, “How’s that supposed to work?”

He laughed nervously, “Well, how do you feel about going to New York with me for the week…so we can still rehearse?”

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I can’t do that. “Dieter, I don’t know if the producers will allow that.”

He was smirking now, “Actually, Lenny, my manager, talked to them this morning and they’re willing to make it work if you’re willing to go with. We would just have to film some things ourselves and there was something mentioned about promo stuff but I dunno what all that entails.”   

Fuck. He was really excited about this. I could tell from the look on his face. I knew this was a big deal for him and for his career. I really didn’t want to be the one thing to hold him back, but I needed to think about it - consider how it could affect things between us. 

“When do you have to let them know something by?” I asked.

“By tomorrow morning, but preferably as soon as possible.”

I nodded. “OK, let me think about it and figure out what exactly that means for us, work wise, if we go. I’d like to know those details first.”

He was nodding along now, “That makes sense. I know it’s short notice and a lot of extra stuff you were not planning on doing, so if you don’t want to, that’s OK. I swear. I don’t want you to feel pressured. I think we can make it work though…and I think it would be fun for us.”

I chuckled, “What I’m not fun enough for you already?” 

His eyes bulged, “No! That’s not what I meant. You know what I mean…and…I did also wanna ask if you’d be willing to do a skit with me.”

I snorted, “What? Like a SNL skit?!?!”

He nodded, “Yes. I have an idea for one.”

I shook my head, “Dieter, I’m not an actor. I can’t…do that.”

He rolled his eyes, “Sure you can. It could be one of the pre-recorded skits, so you don’t have to worry about the live part. I can coach you through it.” 

I took a deep breath, then let it out slowly. He seemed like he really wanted to do this, “What’s the idea?” 

He snickered, “Well…you remember when you said ‘Nobody puts Bravo in the corner’?”

I wasn’t following, “Yeeesss…”

“Well, I think it would be fun to do a Dirty Dancing parody, with the roles reversed.” 

I snorted, “You’re so fucking ridiculous.” 

He burst into laughter, “I know, that’s what makes it funny! It’ll be gold! Come on!” 

I sighed, “Let me think about it. I’ll let you know something in the morning, ok? It’s not a no…yet.”

He huffed and crossed his arms over his chest like a petulant child, “Ooook, fine. I’ll wait for you to think about it.” 

I rolled my eyes at him, then poked him in the chest, “Don’t be bugging me about it either, or I’ll say no.” 

He smirked, “OK. OK. Got it. Let’s rehearse then. I’m ready to get my Jive on today.” 

Dieter did his best Elvis hip wiggle on that last line, curling his lip upward as he spoke. It sent me into a fit of laughter that I struggled to come back from. This set the tone for the rest of the day. He seemed to be in an exceptionally good mood, even for him. The jokes kept coming one after another and he was acting a complete fool the entire time. I’m not sure we ever stopped laughing. He didn’t take himself seriously and I loved that about him. Alec had been the complete opposite, an uptight asshole, which often kept me on edge. It was a nice change, one that I wouldn’t mind being permanent.   

I was actually a little sad once rehearsals were over. We had a good day, and I wasn’t ready for it to end, but I needed to go home and figure out what to do about New York. After we said our goodbyes, I sent a quick text to Stacia and Joe. I needed to know what they were thinking because it sounded like they had a plan. As I was pulling into my garage, my cell rang. It was Joe asking if I could come in for a quick meeting the following morning. I agreed, which was essentially the end of the conversation. 

I had a million questions and did not understand how this was going to work. What about group rehearsals? Or the weekly behind the scenes filming? And what promo stuff would we be doing? Most of all, how the hell would we fit all this in around Dieter’s SNL schedule? It seemed like a lot, but I would be doing it with Dieter. Something told me that if I did go, things would not be the same when we got back. I just didn’t know if that was good or bad.��

The following morning, I had to get up extra early so I could go to Television City Studios to meet with Stacia and Joe. I thought it odd that they didn’t ask to meet with both Dieter and I together, so it automatically had me on edge. The fact that they had agreed to this told me that it was playing into whatever story they were trying to manufacture. So, I knew I had to watch myself. 

Surprisingly, I didn’t have to wait. I was taken back to the conference room straight away where I found Stacia and Joe in unusually bubbly moods. They were chomping at the bit to follow through with whatever they had planned for us. 

Once I was seated, I noticed Stacia looking at me oddly. I couldn’t figure out what it was about. She eventually realized I had noticed her staring, which prompted her to get things started.

“Kat, how are you doing? Everything still going OK with Dieter?”

My brow furrowed slightly, “Yeah, everything with Dieter is great. He’s doing well.” 

She nodded, “Good. That’s what we like to hear. So, I guess he told you about New York then based on your call?”

I nodded, “He did. I was surprised to hear that you guys approved it. I’m curious to hear your plans because I don’t understand how we can possibly pull this off. It’s a lot.” 

Joe smiled, “Actually, I think we can work it out pretty easily. We’re thinking you could take a break from group performances next week. In lieu of that, we can book you on a couple of morning shows. That would meet part of your contract obligations so that some of that stuff is out of the way.”

I took a minute to think about that, it wouldn’t be a bad thing. It would keep me away from Alec for the week too. 

“OK, and what about the behind the scenes filming? Will a crew be coming with us?”

Stacia laughed, “Na, I really don’t think that’s necessary. Dieter can handle some of the filming if we provide the equipment. We also ask that you two ramp up your social media posting a little bit more…maybe even come up with a hashtag or something.” 

They are being way too cool about this. What’s the catch? 

“Where will we rehearse?”

Stacia was still smiling as she continued to stare at me in that odd way, “We’ll book you a space in the hotel. You can rehearse as you have time. It obviously won’t be as structured as it is now, but we think you can work it out.”

How had they figured all of this shit out so quickly? What made them think I would even agree to go?

I pursed my lips in thought. “And our Tuesday morning pre-production meeting?”

“You won’t have to worry about that. We can go over everything now.” 

My brows knitted together, “Without Dieter?” 

Joe smiled politely, “We trust that you can pass the info along to him with no problem.” 

I narrowed my eyes at them, “Why didn’t you meet with both of us together about this?”

Stacia leaned forward, placing her hand on the table in a gesture that was meant to be comforting. “We wanted to run it by you without his influence. I didn’t want you to feel pressured by his presence. His manager made it pretty clear that he really wants to do this.”

I scoffed, “I appreciate the thought, but Dieter would never pressure me into anything. So that wasn’t necessary. I would appreciate it if we could keep our meetings together.” 

Stacia’s lips set into a tight line, “My mistake. Perhaps I should have asked first. Anyway, as far as the plans for next week, we have you doing the Rumba to Thinking Out Loud.” 

The fucking Rumba. Perfect. It was obvious she was fighting a smirk now as she dug around in her binder, and I knew why. The Rumba was one of the most intimate and sensual performances in ballroom dance. It was obvious they were doing everything they could to milk this situation. 

Stacia pulled some papers out, sketches for our costumes. “Luckily, we already had these ready to go. Dieter’s is pretty simple and shouldn’t be an issue. Stop by wardrobe before your spray tans tomorrow evening and they’ll have something similar ready for you to try on. They’ll rework parts of it to make it more like this. We wanna make sure your costumes are ahead of schedule just in case you have travel delays or anything like that.”

I sat staring at them wide-eyed, “Why are you telling me all this? I haven’t agreed.” 

Joe laughed nervously, “Well it’ll be the same details even if you don’t go. Just don’t tell the others you got your dance and song early or they’ll consider it an unfair advantage.”

No shit. This is so fucking bizarre. 

Stacia leaned forward on her elbows, “So, Kat…What are ya thinking? Is it manageable enough for you? Anything else we can do to make this easy on you?” 

What the actual fuck? The crease between my brows deepened. 

“No…I think I’m good. I’ll let you guys know what I decide. Anything else?”

Stacia leaned back in her seat, eyeing me in that weird way she had been since I arrived. “How’s Alec doing?”

I could feel my hackles rise. Why the fuck does she keep doing this? I glared at her for a moment before composing myself, somehow managing a small smile, “Alec is doing just fine...” With his fucking tramp. “If that’s all, I need to get going. I don’t wanna keep Dieter waiting for rehearsals.”

They both smiled, “Of course. We don’t wanna cut into your time, obviously.” Stacia added. 

I got out of there as quickly as I could. I was feeling frustrated and angry. It was obvious what they were up to, again pushing us together for their narrative. However, what frustrated me most was that I knew it might actually cause something to happen between us…or at least I wanted it to. This couldn’t have been set up any better for them.

On the drive to the dance studio, I considered my options. The most attractive thing about going was being away from Alec for a week and not having to dance with him. Fuck. I still have to dance with him on Monday. That was going to go over well. Maybe Emily will swap me with one of the other dancers. That’s going to be a big red flag to the entire cast, and they’ll instantly know something is up, but I guess it’s inevitable. They’re going to know eventually anyway. I was also going to have to face Alec at some point. I needed to prepare myself for that. 

I did need to consider Dieter in this. It was a big deal for him, I could tell. I didn’t want to be the only thing keeping him from doing something that could have a major impact on his career. I was also wondering what it would be like to spend the week with him, away from all this. It would allow us to get to know each other a little better, outside of the studio. It would also give me a chance to see him at work, which I was strangely curious about too. 

I pulled into a parking spot with a few minutes to spare. I sat there going through the pros and cons. There were only two cons that I could think of. One, which was honestly also a pro, something might happen between us. Two, if something did happen, it could ruin our friendship. Was the risk worth it? If Dieter is as amazing as I feel like he is and he wants to be with me, then yes. I think it might be worth it. 

I took a deep breath, then exhaled slowly to calm my nerves. “I can’t believe I’m gonna do this.” 

After a few more deep breaths, I grabbed my bag, got out of the car, and started walking toward the main entrance to the dance studio before I changed my mind. I found Dieter sprawled out on the floor, looking at his phone. He dropped the phone on his chest when I walked in, a smile spreading across his face as he greeted me. 

“There you are! I was about to text you. You’re later than normal.” 

He sat upright and slid his phone across the floor toward his bag. He moved to get up, but I stopped him. “Stay there. We can start our stretches on the floor.” 

He nodded, eyeing me as I sat my bag down and dug my water bottle out. When I turned to face him, he was looking at me expectantly. I knew he was waiting for my answer, but he wasn’t going to ask. I was tempted to wait until the end of rehearsal to tell him, but I knew he needed to know. 

I sat down in front of him and started stretching. He didn’t make any move to stretch with me, instead he continued to stare, his brows arching further into his hairline by the second. 

“Is there a reason you’re not stretching?” I asked, pretending I didn’t know what he was waiting on. 

He scoffed, “Are you messing with me right now?” 

A smile tugged at my lips, I couldn’t fight it. 

A tentative smile spread across his face once he realized it, “You’re gonna go with me?” 

I nodded. He jumped up, leaned down, and pulled me to my feet before I even realized what was happening. His arms wrapped around my middle, lifting me off the floor in a tight hug as he spun us around, thanking me over and over again. I laughed at his overly dramatic reaction, but I knew his excitement was real. 

He finally sat me down, holding my shoulder briefly to make sure I had my footing. 

“Kat, you seriously just made my day. This is a big fucking deal for me right now.” 

“I know. I don’t want you to miss out on the opportunity. It’s gonna be a lot of work though. You know that right?” 

He nodded, maybe a little too enthusiastically. “I’ll work my ass off, I promise…oh! I need to text Lenny so he can get things moving.” 

He ran over to grab his phone off the floor and started tapping away. 

“So, when do we need to leave?” I asked. 

He paused and stared at the ceiling, like he was doing calculations.

“Umm…” He grimaced. “Tomorrow, like right after the show is over probably? I don’t know the flight times though. We might have to do a red-eye.” 

It was my turn to grimace, “Oof. That’s rough. Damn, when are we gonna have time to pack?”

He shrugged, “You think we’re far enough ahead this week to cut out a few hours early? We do have the fucking spray tans later this evening. Ugh, can we skip that?” 

I chuckled, “I doubt it. Maybe we can next week though? Hopefully.” 

I looked at the time. “Let's get four hours in and see how we’re feeling. If all is well, I say we go pack. Otherwise, we’ll be up late doing that.” 

He nodded, “Sounds like a plan.”  

I watched as he opened the camera on his phone and put it in selfie mode, “Guess we better start our social media campaign.” 

He quickly leaned in, snapping a pic of himself and half of my head. I laughed, “I’m sure they’re gonna love that one.” 

He snickered as he tapped away at his phone for a couple more minutes, before setting it back down next to his bag. Suddenly, my phone dinged with an Instagram notification. Well, that’s embarrassing. He looked at me with narrowed eyes, “Do you have notifications turned on for my posts?” 

I shook my head, turning away as I fought a nervous smile, “No…of course not.” 

He stepped in front of me and placed his pointer finger under my chin, raising it so that I was looking at him. I felt the heat of his touch jolt through my entire body as he gave me the cockiest smirk. 

“Say that to my face, please.” 

I couldn’t say it without smiling, I was the worst liar. “I-umm…”

His smirk turned into his cheesy lopsided grin as he tapped my nose with his finger, “That’s what I thought…Don’t worry Kit Kat. I know you love me. You don’t have to hide it.” 

He said it with a teasing tone, but that didn’t stop my eyes from widening at his words. “I-I just figured if we have to do all this social media stuff, I wanna know what you're posting about me. That’s all. Don’t get any crazy ideas.” 

He chuckled, “Mmmhmm. Sure. I’m on to you.” 

I scoffed and rolled my eyes, “Whatever, Bravo. Get to stretching so we can get out of here.” 

He locked eyes with me, leaning in as he spoke. “Yes ma’am. Where do you want me?” 

What. The. Fuck. Is that? I was fairly certain that I stopped breathing. His eyes were smoldering - absolutely burning into my soul. I cleared my throat, “O-On the floor.” 

That came out breathier than I had intended. He arched a brow at me. 

“You need to stretch.” I reminded him.

His eyes darted around my face as his teeth sunk into his bottom lip, trying to hold back a smile. Something told me that he knew exactly what he was doing. New York was going to be interesting.

Once I managed to get him focused, we hit rehearsals hard. The Jive was not an easy dance, so we were exhausted by the time our four hours were up. My hips and feet were beginning to ache. That figures. Just before a long ass flight too. 

We were feeling pretty good about where things were, so we did end up leaving early to go pack before the cast spray tan session. When I got home, I quickly checked Dieter’s Instagram post before I got started.

I felt a rush of excitement when I saw the post. He really put #SheSecretlyLovesMe as a fucking hashtag? I wasn’t prepared for that. It was obviously a joke, but something about it felt a little flirty. There was also something about seeing a selfie of us together. It wasn’t like one of the performance shots from the show. This was personal and intimate in a weird way. We were letting the public into what I thought was our carefully crafted bubble. 

I had to push those thoughts out of my head, I didn’t have time for that now because I had to rush to pack. It was a struggle, half of my laundry was dirty because I hadn’t felt like doing it. I had to get creative with my outfit choices for the week, only having time to wash and dry one load. I managed to get most of it taken care of before it was time to leave for our latest spray tan session. 

During the drive over, I could feel my nervousness setting in over the possibility of seeing Alec and Lana. Not knowing how they were going to act toward me or behave toward each other was the biggest cause of it. Their behavior had the potential to cause some serious drama.  

Once I got to Television City Studios, I waited in my car until I saw Dieter arrive. I didn’t want to chance getting cornered by Alec or Lana alone. By the time I moved to get out, Dieter was already there with a questioning look on his face.

“What are you doing? Hiding in your car?” 

I laughed nervously, “I wasn’t hiding…I was just taking care of some last minute stuff.” I lied. 

He nodded, “Yeah, I feel you on that. I’ve had to make a long list of instructions for my assistant. He’s on plant and cat duty while I’m gone.” 

I chuckled, “Shouldn’t he be coming with you?”

Dieter snickered, “Umm, normally he would, yes. But he can run my calendar and boss me around remotely. I guess I need to find a permanent plant and cat sitter for when I’m gone though…”  

He looked pensive for a moment, “Are there professionals that do that sort of thing? Like certified? I’m pretty picky about that shit…I can’t leave them with just any random person. Especially Zee. She’s probably gonna be a mess while I’m gone...” 

I would’ve laughed at him if he didn’t look completely serious and sincere with his words. Could he be anymore fucking adorable? The care that he gave to his plants and Zee was completely melting my heart. If I knew nothing else about him, that alone would probably make me fall for him. 

I stood there taking in his expression, his lips pursed as he considered the question before he reached to rub at the back of his neck and sighed. The prospect of having to find someone to fill those important shoes while he was out of town seemed like a massive feat for him. My mind wandered, questioning if that was something I could do for him - take care of the things he cared about most when he couldn’t. I found myself wanting to. I wanted to take care of him. 

I suddenly realized Dieter was staring at me with questioning eyes. Shit, he said something to me, didn’t he?

I shook my head, “I’m sorry, what?” 

He smiled nervously, “Are you ok? You seem a little distracted. Am I boring you with my plant and cat problems?”

I gave him a genuine smile, “Absolutely not. I love hearing about your cat and plants.” We started walking toward the front entrance. “Please never stop telling me about them.” I added. 

He chuckled shyly, “If it gets annoying, just tell me to shut the fuck up. I know that I get carried away sometimes.” 

I shook my head, “You will never hear that from me.” 

He reached to pull the door open for me, then lightly placed his hand at the small of my back as he followed me through the door. His touch caused sparks at the base of my spin that shot out all the way to my fingertips and toes. I don’t know why because he often touched me there while we were dancing. This was nothing new. I can only assume it had to do with how casually he touched me off the dance floor these days. Especially since he had such an aversion to it in the beginning. 

We made our way toward the dressing rooms, eventually parting ways so we could get changed for our spray tans. Just as I was closing the door behind me, Alec and Lana passed by. Figures they would be here already. I sighed. I really did not want to be alone around them. 

I toed off my shoes, then stood there for a moment, feeling like there was something I was supposed to do. Then suddenly I realized I had forgotten that we were supposed to go to the wardrobe department first. “Shit.”

I grabbed my phone to text Dieter. I wasn’t even sure if he knew we were supposed to do that. 

Me: Hey, I forgot…we’re supposed to check in with wardrobe about next week’s costumes before tanning. 

Dieter: That would make sense…heading your way. 

There was a knock at the door. I turned to open it without a glance. Instead, I wandered around the room to find my flip flops as Dieter pushed the door open and leaned against the door frame with his arm above his head. Once I had my shoes on and moved toward the door, I was taken aback by how good he looked. I’m almost certain I froze on the spot as my eyes scanned up his broad towering form. It must have been obvious what was going through my head based on the smirk that appeared on his lips when my gaze finally met his. 

“You see something you like, honey?” He said in a husky voice. 

I swallowed thickly, “No, I see someone who’s standing in my way. Are you gonna move?” 

He chuckled, stepping to the side to let me pass, but I hesitated. Tensing once I caught sight of Alec and Lana walking back down the hallway toward the spray tan room. Alec’s back was toward us, but Lana’s was not. Her eyes connected with mine, she gave me a curious smile as they passed by. I could feel my jaw tighten as I inhaled a deep breath. I felt Dieter’s hand on the small of my back again, grounding me from whatever spiral I was about to go down. 

I felt him lean in close to my ear. “Kat is everything ok?” he asked quietly. 

“Yeah, of course. Let’s go.” 

He gave me an odd look before motioning for me to exit through the doorway. He followed, closing the door behind us. 

Minutes later we found ourselves in the wardrobe department, Amy and her assistant were in a tizzy trying to find clothing in the proper size for us. Apparently, Dieter had slimmed down some since rehearsals started, which wasn’t unusual given how much exercise we were getting. So, they had to size his black pants down. They were still having an issue with the white button up shirt being too tight in the shoulders and chest. Of course they are, because he’s so fucking broad.

His slightly smaller waist was now emphasizing just how broad he actually was. I couldn’t help staring at his reflection in the mirror as they fussed over him, pinning and marking for alterations at the waist of the shirt as they joked about how many buttons he would need to leave open so he could move properly without ripping the shoulder seams. 

As I took him in, I noticed the pants were a different style than what they usually gave him. The fit was snugger in the thighs and ass, emphasizing all the right parts of him. Add that to the way the plain white button up shirt was hugging his biceps and shoulders…it nearly had me salivating like a crazed animal. Who knew such a simple outfit could look so fucking hot on a man. 

My attention was drawn back to the conversation happening around me when Amy asked with a sly smile what I thought about the costume. Fuck, she totally caught me ogling him. My eyes were drawn to Dieter’s in the mirror. He was smirking at me as he waited for an answer. Busted. Again. If I kept this up, he was eventually going to ask me point blank what my fucking problem is. 

I cleared my throat, “I mean…I think it looks great. Can’t go wrong with the classics.” 

They seemed happy with their handiwork at that point. Helping him remove this shirt so that he didn’t get stuck with pins. Meanwhile, I was ogling him again. I did not need to see him like this because he looked too fucking good. It seemed like his belly had shrunk some, but he was still soft around the middle, the way I liked. His shoulders and chest seemed more sculpted if that were even possible. I had to force myself to turn away before I got caught again, though from the cocky glances I noticed Dieter shooting my way, I think I may already have been.

After that, Dieter was off to the changing room to put his clothes back on and it was my turn to be poked and prodded at. They had put me in a backless white dress that had a low cut sparkly bodice and a feathered bottom half. It looked nothing like the sketch Stacia had shown me, but I didn’t question it. 

“Alright Kat, instead of making yours from scratch, I’m gonna rework this one. That way we at least have the sizing on the bodice and straps worked out.” She turned, grabbing a bolt of fabric, offering it to me to look at. 

“I’m gonna redo the bottom half with a sheer white fabric that I’ve ordered. It’ll have silver threading and beading to match the bodice. It’s similar to this but has a little more bling and it’ll be more romantic and flowy looking.”

I nodded, “Sounds good. I trust that it’ll look amazing with you in charge.” 

Dieter was behind me now, coming closer to inspect the bolt of fabric I was holding before letting his eyes scan over every inch of the dress. He arched an eyebrow and smiled at Amy, “I think that’s gonna look awesome, Amy. Then again, Kat can make a potato sack look amazing.”

He turned away, like he hadn’t just dropped a bomb, going to stand out of the way so Amy could get to work. I was shocked over his comment as I turned to Amy with my mouth slightly agape, catching a look pass between her and her assistant. Great, there’s some gossip for the cast to spread around.   

After Amy was satisfied with her alterations, they left Dieter and I alone for a few minutes to go pull shoe options for me. I decided to break the tension by suggesting we snap a quick picture for Instagram, figuring we might as well get into a habit of it now. Dieter leaned over in front of the mirror with a small smile while I snapped a few pictures with my phone. I took the opportunity to make a teaser post that we had big plans for the following week.

A few seconds after posting it, Dieter’s phone chimed in his pocket. I gave him a smug look, “Now who has Instagram alerts turned on?”  

He shrugged, “I mean, if you’re gonna be making posts about me…I wanna know what you're saying.” 

I narrowed my eyes and nodded, “Mmmhmm. Sure.” 

Amy returned then, offering me four options for shoes. Once I made my choice, I went to change out of the costume. We hustled to get back to our dressing rooms so we could change into our “spray tan” gear, then made our way to where the cast was congregating to wait their turn. They had already started the session, but to my dismay, Alec and Lana were still waiting. I had hoped they were done and gone already. I made a point to stay as far away from them as possible while also trying to not look in their direction. Of course, Dieter noticed. 

“Is Alec too good to talk to you when I’m around now?” he asked, eyeing them on the other side of the room. 

I sighed, “He probably hasn’t noticed me. It’s not a big deal.” 

His brows furrowed, “Oh he one hundred percent noticed you. I saw him looking…”

I felt panic rising in my chest and my face tensing, “I said it’s not a big deal. Drop it.”  There was no way I could explain what happened without getting emotional right now. I didn’t want to give Alec that satisfaction.

Dieter gave me a look of confusion but didn’t question it further. If he hadn’t realized something was up before, he definitely did now. I changed the subject, more so to give myself something else to focus on than anything, “You wanna grab some dinner after this? I’m starving.”

He gave me a guarded look, “Sure. What did you have in mind?”

I thought for a moment, “I’m thinking burritos. It’s a burrito kind of day.” 

He nodded, “I think I can get behind that.” 

We managed to avoid Alec and Lana for the reminder of our time there. Luckily, we didn’t have to wait long before one of the production assistants called us in. The staff had apparently been told to get us through as quickly as possible, which I appreciated. Stacia and Joe had actually done something right for once. 

Dieter and I finished up with our spray tans around the same time. I took advantage of it and walked back toward the dressing rooms with him, still paranoid about running into Alec or Lana. Luckily, we didn’t. We briefly parted to our respective dressing rooms to change. I was digging around in my gym bag, trying to find my shirt when Dieter knocked at the door. I yelled for him to come, not paying him any attention as I got more aggravated that I couldn’t find what I was looking for. 

I puffed air out through my cheeks and placed my hands on my hips, confused as to why I couldn't find my shirt. I finally met Dieter’s wide-eyed gaze, now realizing I was standing there in jeans and a black push-up bra. 

I sighed, “Put your eyes back in your head, Bravo. It’s not like you haven’t seen me in athletic wear before.” 

He laughed nervously, “That’s true…however, athletic wear doesn’t emphasize things like that.” 

I rolled my eyes at him as he tried not to stare at my chest. He eventually leaned down and picked something up that must have fallen out of my bag.

“That what you’re looking for?” he asked as he handed it to me. 

My forehead dropped into my palm as I sighed, “Yes…it is. Thank you. I thought I forgot it.” 

After throwing the t-shirt over my head, I started gathering my belongings. He watched me intently as I shoved things into my bag more forcefully than necessary. I wasn’t even sure why I was suddenly so irritated. I assume it was from seeing that asshat with her again. 

“Kat, did something happen? You know you can tell me. I feel like something’s going on with you the last couple of days.” He said gently.

Great job hiding it, Kat. I turned to face him, fighting back my emotions before I responded. “Yes. Ok. Something happened…but…I-I don’t wanna talk about it right now. Can we just have a normal evening? Please? I promise I’ll tell you. I just need time to process it.” 

His brow furrowed as anger flashed in his eyes. 

I shook my head, “He didn’t hurt me, if that’s what you're thinking. It’s…not that.” It seemed to calm him knowing that much at least. I shoved the last of my stuff in my bag and zipped it up.  

“Come on. Take me to get some food…please.” 

He opened the door, allowing me to walk out ahead of him. We were quiet until we got to the parking lot. I opened the trunk, threw my bag in, then turned to Dieter, “You’re driving.” 

He arched a brow at me and smiled, “Yes ma’am.” 

I followed him over to his car and plopped down in the passenger seat as he threw his bag into the back. Once he got situated behind the wheel, he grabbed a pair of glasses and popped them on his face. I couldn’t help admiring how adorable he looked with his glasses and messy hair. He glanced at me, looking slightly worried, “What? Is my spray tan fucked up or something?” 

I chuckled, “No. Just admiring your glasses.” 

He smirked, turning his head forward and starting the car. As we were on our way, I called in a pickup order. Dieter gave me an odd look but didn’t question it. After disconnecting the call, I tried to lighten the mood by asking about Zee. That seemed to do the trick, keeping him talking until we got to the restaurant. We sat in the parking lot, waiting for the text that our food was ready. After about forty-five minutes of waiting, Dieter was beginning to get impatient as his stomach grumbled loudly. 

Just as he started his tirade of complaints, I snapped a quick picture of him making his annoyed face, snickering as I posted it to Instagram before he even realized what was happening. His phone chimed with an alert. He paused mid-sentence, narrowing his eyes in my direction. 

“What did you just post?” he asked sternly, before cracking a smile. 

I shrugged, “Might as well get used to it. If we have to post social media shit, I’m gonna be as obnoxious as possible with it.” 

He looked at his phone and snorted, “Fucking hell, Kat. OK…it’s on now. Just remember anything that I post going forward is your fault. You started this.”

I rolled my eyes at him, “Whatever you say, Bravo.”

My phone dinged with a text that our food was ready. I moved to get out, but Dieter locked the door on me. 

“I got it. You sit,” he said sternly. 

I scoffed, “Well…OK then.” 

He was back within minutes, shaking his head as he handed me the food through the window. Once he was back in the driver’s seat he gave me an exasperated look. 

“What’s wrong?” I asked. 

“Apparently the girl working the front is a Dieterina shipper. I got questioned out about why the food was in your name and why I was the one picking it up. Like that means something…” 

My head dropped back against the seat, “Great. Here we go with that stuff…they’ll look for anything.”

I felt my stomach do a little flip at the thought of it meaning something. It didn’t bother me as much as it once did. Especially now that Alec was out of the picture. However, I didn’t want Dieter to be associated with that new development in any way. He didn’t need a reputation as a home wrecker to add to his list.

Once we decided that we would eat in the car, I began filling him in on the details from my meeting with Stacia and Joe - not having told him everything yet. We got a head start on discussing our dance for the following week as I pulled up the song to listen to while we devoured our burritos. We sat in silence, listening to it in full, twice. I could feel the tension forming between us as the realization set in of how intimate this dance was about to be. All while we were off on our own together in New York. 

We sat almost a little stunned as we considered our options for the Rumba. I finally suggested we think on it and discuss it more once we made it through the Jive. It felt like an added pressure to worry about it right now. At least it did for me now that I was thinking of everything else that was coming at us with it. 

After we finished eating, he dropped me off at my car so I could head home for the evening. Once home, I rushed to finish up the last of my packing since we would be leaving for the airport directly from the studio after the show was over. I wasn’t even sure of most of our travel details. I just knew a car would be picking me up in the morning. As bad as it sounded, I was relying on Dieter to know what was going on since his people were working with both studios to figure everything out. It was a little nerve wrecking, but I brushed it off as I crawled into bed and passed out from the exhaustion the last few days had brought. 

I was in a rush the following morning, double checking that I had everything and also trying to get ready before my ride was due to arrive at 7AM. I was beginning to feel overwhelmed with everything to come as I stood at the kitchen counter, reading through an email from Stacia and Joe with my schedule of promo appearances for the week when a text came through from Dieter. I checked the time. It was 6:55 AM. Confused as to why he was texting me so early, I switched to my messenger app. 

Dieter: Your ride is here. Do you need any help?

A crease formed between my brows, “What the fu…” 

I walked over to look out through the curtains. Sure enough, I could see Dieter through the open back window of a SUV that was sitting in my driveway. My phone dinged again. 

Dieter: Also, your plants look sad. I’m disappointed in you. Have I taught you nothing? 😂 (laughing to tears emoji)

I rolled my eyes.

ME: First of all, shut up about my plants. I do not have a green thumb and I have accepted that. I’ll be out in a minute. 

I hurried around, double checking that everything was turned off and locked up before grabbing my bags and heading out the front door. The driver got out of the car, rushing to help me. He took my bags as Dieter pushed his door open and slid to the opposite side of the car so I could get in without having to walk around.

I got in and sat down with a huff, “I wasn’t aware that I would be riding with you this morning.”

He shrugged and handed me a coffee, “Ehh, it’s on the way.” 

I gave him a confused look, “No it’s not.” 

He chuckled nervously, “It is if I’m getting coffee…and take the long way.” 

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. He was so extra sometimes. 

He elbowed me gently, “Hey…about your plants…can I send someone over to take care of that for you? I don’t like sad plants.” 

I snorted, “You’re joking…”

His eyes widened, like he had been caught doing something he shouldn’t, “Yeees. Totally joking.” 

I gasped, “You’re not joking!” 

He shook his head, “No. I’m kind of serious…actually.” 

My head shook from side to side, “Dieter…no. Absolutely not.” 

He pouted like a petulant child in that way he does. 

I poked him in the arm, “Stop that right now. I’ll take care of them when I get back.”

“When you get back!?!?! They’ll be dead by then!” he said dramatically. 

I couldn’t help laughing at him, it was honestly cute that he cared that much.

“I’ll have my assistant stop by to water them. He’s on plant duty anyway.” 

I scoffed, “Dieter…no.” 

“Shhhh. It’s happening. I’m not discussing it any further.” He waved his hand dismissively in my direction as he turned his attention to tapping at his phone.

My mouth dropped open in shock over his sassy attitude, “Did you just…” 

“Yes. Now be quiet, I need to concentrate to type up these instructions.” 

He gave me the side-eye with a small smile tugging at his lips. I shoved his leg with mine as he burst out laughing. So, this is how this week is gonna go. 

After arriving at Television City Studios, the driver helped unload our bags so we could store them in our dressing rooms. We got several odd looks as we wheeled our luggage through the lobby and down the dressing room hallway. The sight was sure to cause some gossip since no one knew about our plans for the upcoming week. 

Once we dropped off our luggage, Dieter and I headed to the ballroom to get the first few run throughs with the band and camera blocking out of the way. I tried not to pay attention to the eyes on us because I knew Alec and Lana were among them, but by the time we finished, I could feel my nerves setting in. I would have to face Alec soon enough for the group performance dress rehearsal. 

I spent a fair amount of my time in the hair and makeup chair trying to focus and not let that asshole get to me, determined not to let him mess me up today. I knew Dieter could sense my tension from the way he kept looking at me with concern, but he never said anything. Instead, he tried to keep me distracted by talking about anything and everything as we sat there getting lathered in hair spray, gel, and makeup. Occasionally, he would reach over and give my arm or hand a reassuring squeeze when he was able. 

Then, Lana and Alec walked in. They sat on the opposite side from us, thankfully, but we could easily still catch glimpses of each other in the mirrors. It wasn’t lost on me that Alec was keeping an eye on us when he was able. His gaze making me feel more tense by the minute, causing my chest to tighten and my breathing to pick up. 

I turned my chair facing away from the mirror, toward Dieter instead. Dieter’s wide-eyed reflection told me that he could see the panic setting in. Without warning, he turned his chair to face toward me, which resulted in a minor scolding from the girl working on his hair. He didn’t say anything, but I could see how concerned he was from the way his eyes were focused on me. 

I sat staring at the rise and fall of his chest, attempting to match his breathing. After a short time passed, I felt something pressing against my lower leg, just above the ankle. I glanced down and found Dieter’s outstretched leg against mine, grounding me to the here and now. It was unexpected and exactly what I needed. When I finally looked up and met his gaze, I realized my eyes were pooling with tears. He saw it too. 

He looked around, checking to see if anyone else had noticed. He cleared his throat, “Hey, I’ve been meaning to ask…do you mind if I list you as Zee’s secondary emergency contact on her paperwork? You’re the only other person she likes so far. You know, just in case I’m outta town or something?” 

His question took me by surprise, which I’m pretty sure was his intent. It also made me feel emotional in a different way. I knew he was putting a lot of trust in me for something like that. I sniffled. 

“Really? Does that make me like her godmother or something?” 

He shrugged, “Is that a thing for cats? I mean, I guess so…” 

The ladies working on our hair let out a chorus of “awwws” over his question. I gave him a genuine smile, thankful that he was here with me. He always knew what I needed. 

“Of course, anything for Zee.” I finally answered.

He returned my smile with one of his own. He almost looked…relieved? I wasn’t sure if it was from my answer or the fact that the distraction had worked. 

Another girl stepped in to start working on my makeup at that point, so Dieter had to move his leg away from mine. I found myself longing for his warmth the second it was gone. We did, however, stay facing each other. 

We soon found ourselves talking and joking with the ladies who were getting us ready, and I had completely forgotten about Alec and Lana on the other side of the room. Dieter kept the laughs going by giving suggestions on my hair and makeup. Most of it was said with the intention of being funny, but they did take him up on the suggestion to add a red rose accessory to the side of my hair that was pinned back. He went on to say that it would make my red lips and nails pop a little more, seemingly thrilled that they actually agreed with him. 

Time flew by after that, and we were finished in hair and makeup before we knew it. Dieter had refused to leave his seat until I was finished, and surprisingly they didn’t make a big deal out of it. I think they enjoyed his company just as much as I did. When we finally got up to leave, he followed closely behind me, somewhat blocking my view of Alec and Lana. I had a feeling his actions were intentional but couldn’t know for certain. 

Once we got into the hallway, I felt his fingers slide around my left hand, his thumb gently gliding back and forth over the engagement ring that I still wore on my finger. I noticed his brow furrow slightly before asking if I was ok. I nodded. He smiled before leaning in next to my ear and speaking in a low voice. 

“Just for the record, I think you look amazing in red.” 

I could feel the heat creeping up into my cheeks and a tingle between my thighs from his words. I gave him a shy smile just as we reached my dressing room door. My grip tightened on his hand, before pulling him into a hug. A real hug. Not one of those half-assed side hugs we did more often than not. I didn’t hesitate to bury my face in his neck, inhaling his scent as deeply as I could. 

“Thank you for keeping me together back there.” 

I felt his arms tighten around me, “You don't have to thank me for that. You know I’d do anything for you.” 

I pulled away and cupped his cheeks with both hands, letting my eyes roam over his face before I gave him a sad smile, “I know you would. Thank you just the same though.”

I felt his fingers twitch on my hips, suddenly making me aware of how this might appear to onlookers. I dropped my hands and stepped away, “I guess we better get changed for dress rehearsal.” 

He nodded, “Yeah, I’ll meet you back here so we can go together, OK?” 

I nodded. He seemed to sense that I didn’t want to be left wandering the halls alone. He could already read me better than Alec ever could. 

Minutes later, we had changed and were heading back to the ballroom. Quickly getting through our dress rehearsal with a few minor errors on my part. Having Alec lurking around was really starting to become a distraction. Knowing that I would soon have to dance with him was making me extremely anxious and I was having a hard time moving past it. I hoped once that was out of the way, I would be able to focus on our routine the way I needed to. 

After our dress rehearsal, Dieter walked me back to my dressing room so I could change into the group performance costume while he waited just outside the door. When I was ready, he escorted me back to the ballroom. He tried to keep the conversation light through it all. Even managing to make me laugh a few times. I had to appreciate his efforts, I’m not sure I would have made it through the day without him. 

Before I knew it, the professional dance cast was gathering on the dance floor to run through the opening performance. Dieter stayed nearby, casually sprawled out in a chair, watching. It did give me some comfort knowing he was there. 

As we were standing around the center of the floor, awaiting instructions from Emily, Alec approached me. I refused to look at him directly. For once he seemed nervous and unsure of himself as he worked up the courage to speak to me. 

“Kat, can we talk later? Please?” 

My eyes briefly cut toward him, “I have nothing to say to you.” 

He sighed, “Please. Just let me explain.” 

I could feel the rage bubbling inside of me. What could he possibly have to say that would explain his behavior? I turned to face him, my expression not hiding the anger I was feeling. 

“I don’t even want to be in your presence right now. You should consider yourself lucky that I’m not making a big deal out of having to dance with you today. So, just keep your damn mouth shut and let’s get our fucking job done.” 

His eyes widened, shocked that I was standing up to him in such a way. I could sense several cast members watching us, clearly having overheard me. It seemed to make Alec uncomfortable, probably because he couldn’t react how he normally would to my defiance. His only response was to nod and stand there quietly. He stayed that way until we started the routine. Surprisingly, he did drop the issue. The only communication between us was what the performance required. We managed to make it through without any issues. 

I walked off the dance floor without saying another word to him, feeling more relaxed and realizing that he no longer had any hold over me. This thing with him was finally over and I could let him go. He had to know there was no coming back from it and he couldn’t blame me for it either.

Dieter stood and moved to meet me at the edge of the dance floor with a questioning look on his face. I gave him a genuine smile now, looping my arm through his as I pulled him toward the exit, “Come on, let’s get our final fittings done.” 

The rest of the morning went by in a blur as we rushed to finish up with our final fittings and stop in for touch ups on hair and makeup. Before we knew it, we were in the staging area, waiting for the live show to begin. I managed to make it through the opening performance with Alec without any issue. He didn’t try to speak to me at all outside of what was necessary. It seemed he had finally listened to me for once. Afterwards, I rushed to change for my performance with Dieter. I was eager to be back with him, finding that his presence was like a comforting balm to my still raw emotions that threatened to break free at any moment. I was more than happy to be done with Alec, but there was still some residual hurt there too. There always would be since he had taken up such a large part of my life. However, Dieter seemed to make it a lot more bearable.

When I finally made my way back to Dieter, he gave me a brilliant smile before leaning in to tell me that I stole the show once again. I rolled my eyes at the compliment but was flattered by it just the same. We took a minute to take some quick pictures in costume to post on social media to make the bosses happy - both of us adding playful comments about each other just to make it more entertaining.

He stood there for a moment, staring at his phone before glancing in my direction.

“You know, those shorts should be illegal. I can’t believe they’re letting you dance in those.” 

I scoffed, “Excuse me? I’m pretty sure I’ve worn less clothing to dance in than this before.” 

He chuckled, still looking at his phone, “That may be true, but those little skirts don’t hug your ass like that.” 

My eyebrows disappeared into my hairline as I stared at him. His eyes widened, like he just realized he said that out loud. He slowly raised his head to meet my gaze and gave me a sheepish smile, his cheeks turning a little red. 

He shrugged, “I’m sorry. I’m a man. I’m gonna notice a nice ass. Especially when it’s shaking in front of me on the daily. Sue me.” 

I snorted at his openness. He had no shame. If only he knew all the parts of his body that caught my attention on the daily…

To break the tension, I pulled out my phone to get our weekly hype song ready. I handed Dieter one of the earbuds, he gave me a questioning look as he listened before bursting out laughing. 

“The Brian Setzer Orchestra? Really? I swear I never know what you're gonna pick…I love it.” 

I laughed, “Keeping with the theme of the week. Gotta get you in the Jive mindset.” 

We started moving to the beat of the music, getting into the right mindset for the high energy dance we were about to perform. Out of nowhere, a camera was suddenly being shoved in our faces reminding me about the behind the scenes filming they were starting this week. It sort of took away from the moment, but we smiled and waved. Luckily, they didn’t stick with us for long. Dieter and I both shared a look of annoyance as they moved to another area to film. I made a mental note to find us a place to hide for the following week. 

Minutes later, we made our way out onto the dance floor and took our places. The spotlight dropped down on Dieter, who was standing in the middle of the stage. He opened with some of his signature Elvis Presley hip wiggles to the audience’s delight. He soon joined me on the main floor where we shifted into our high energy swing style dance. Neither of us missed a beat as we made our way through the routine - rock stepping, kicking, and twirling with smiles. Dieter added to the theatrics by giving several lip curls as he continued to gyrate around the floor. We finally ended with a flourish, settling into our ending pose as the lights dimmed to darkness around us. 

The screaming and applause from the crowd was almost deafening as we made our way over to the interview area and awaited our scores. Dieter was his usual charming self as he answered questions about his struggles for the week. He shifted to praising me for my patience and ability to get him to where he needed to be for the competition, hugging me tightly into his side as he spoke. His occasional glances in my direction were causing all sorts of reactions from my body. Clearly the high energy atmosphere was only intensifying things for me because the only thing I could think about doing was getting him back to his dressing room to straddle his thick thighs and have my way with him.  

I was drawn from my thoughts just as the judges began to read off our scores, giving us three 9’s and one 10. We were inching closer and closer to a perfect score every week and I absolutely could not believe it. Especially since the judges tended to get more critical as the weeks went on. Dieter was beyond excited, lifting me off the floor with a spin as we briefly celebrated the results.   

We spent the rest of the show watching from the staging area. Again, our only real competition this week seemed to be Alec and Lana, which grated on my nerves. Everything in me was hoping they would fuck up and get voted off the show, so I didn’t have to look at them anymore. It didn’t look like that was happening anytime soon though. 

Dieter didn’t leave my side until we returned to our dressing rooms to change out of our costumes. When I opened the door to set the dry cleaning bag outside for pickup, Alec was there with his hand posed to knock on the door. 

The anger that I felt in that instant was beyond anything I could describe. I couldn’t believe he had the audacity to try and “explain” this situation to me after what I saw. I dropped the dry cleaning bag beside the door then crossed my arms over my chest, refusing to allow him to enter my dressing room. I didn’t want to be alone with him out of view of other people. 

“I believe I told you that I didn’t wanna speak to you.” 

He tried to crowd me so that I would move backward into the room, but I didn’t budge. 

I gave him a pointed look, “Whatever it is you have to say, you can say right here.” 

He scoffed, “We have no privacy here.”

I shrugged, “Well… I didn’t wanna hear what you had to say anyway.”

I moved to close the door, but he stopped it with his hand. 

I huffed, giving him a frustrated look. 

“Kat, come on. You can’t blame this all on me. You’ve been checked out for months. You’ve wanted nothing to do with me. What was I supposed to do?”

“I dunno, maybe try to earn my trust back? I’m sorry but worrying about who you’ve been fucking and if I’m gonna get an STD is kind of a mood killer in the bedroom.”

His eyes widened, anger flashing there briefly before he remembered where he was. 

I laughed sarcastically, “Did you really think this little talk was gonna work after what I walked in on? This wasn’t texting other people or chatting online, Alec. There is no talking your way out of it. You fucked up and it’s all on you. I told you this was your last chance, and it literally took you…what, all of three days to fuck up again? You didn’t even try. So, fuck your excuses. I’m done.” 

I moved to pull the ring off my finger. He looked like he was about to have a meltdown as I held it out to him. Something between hurt, defeat, and anger was swirling behind his eyes as he took it from me. I don’t think it ever occurred to him that this could be an outcome for his actions. 

His jaw ticked to the side, it seemed anger was winning. “This is because of Bravo, isn’t it?”

I shook my head, “Dieter doesn’t have a damn thing to do with this, so don’t even go there. You did this when you decided to fuck around with other people. YOU. No one else.” 

I sighed, realizing there were now a couple of people hanging around to be nosey. Fuck this. I don’t owe him a conversation. “Give me my house key and leave please.”

Alec shook his head, “I don’t have it on me.” He was such a fucking liar. His keys were half hanging out of his pants pocket. I rolled my eyes, reaching to grab them before he realized what was going on. I took my key off the ring then tossed the rest back at him before shutting the door in his face and locking it. 

I sank down in one of the plush chairs, letting relief wash over me now that that part was over with. I hoped he would let it go, but deep down, I knew he wouldn’t. I couldn’t have been happier that this was my last season on the show for this reason alone. It was probably also a good thing that I was going out of town for the week. At least it would give him some time to cool down. 

My phone chimed with a text from Dieter asking me to let him in. I drug myself up out of the chair to turn the lock and open the door. Dieter didn’t make a move to come in, instead he reached for my chin, tilting my head upward to meet his gaze before settling his hand on my shoulder.

“Are you OK? I overheard someone say you and Alec were arguing.” 

My eyes scanned the open dressing room doors behind him. It seemed like there were more people milling around than normal. Without a word, I pulled Dieter inside and shut the door behind us. I didn’t care what anyone thought about it. 

When Dieter turned to face me, I was fighting back tears. He pulled me against his chest into a tight hug. He hadn’t hesitated to come to me when he thought I might need him. I really didn’t deserve him. We stood there in silence for what seemed like an eternity before he finally spoke. 

“Can you please tell me if you’re OK? He didn’t do anything to you did he?”

I shook my head against his firm chest, “No…not physically anyway.” 

I could feel his body relax against mine as he hugged me just a little tighter, causing me to melt into his arms. He really did give the best hugs, completely enveloping me with his scent and warmth. Honestly, I couldn’t remember the last time I had felt safer or more content than in that moment. I never wanted to let him go. 

Our moment was broken by his cell chiming in his hand. He sighed, pulling away to look at it. He left his other hand resting at the nape of my neck.

“Our ride to the airport is here. You ready to go?” he asked. His fingers lightly threaded through my hair as he spoke. 

I nodded, moving away from him to collect my bags. He helped me get them into the hallway, then I followed him down to his dressing room so he could grab his. There were more than a few curious eyes on us as he emerged with his own suitcases. I was sure that our strange departure together would only add to the gossip in the days to come. 

We were silent during the ride to the airport, but that didn’t stop him from reaching between us for my left hand, settling his on top of it, squeezing in what was meant to be a comforting gesture. His thumb made a few passes across my knuckles before pausing. In my periphery, I could see his head turn toward me slightly as he glanced downward. A crease formed between his brows before he met my gaze. I could see his jaw tighten as his eyes danced around my face before he eventually turned to stare out the window. He rubbed his chin for a moment, then I felt his fingers move to entwin through the tops of mine. We stayed like that until we got to the airport. 

Of course there were paparazzi at the airport, shouting questions at us about the show and asking why we were traveling together. Dieter was quick to mention that we were traveling for work. That was really the only question either of us answered. I was in no mood for it and Dieter didn’t seem like he was either. 

By the time we got on the plane, we were dragging. It had been such a long day already and we still had to make it through the five hour flight and get to the hotel. We knew we were going to be running on fumes the next day after considering the three hour time loss in our schedule. So, we did try to sleep on the plane. After falling asleep on Dieter’s shoulder, I did manage to rest better than expected, but it wasn’t enough.

It was nearing 6 AM by the time we finally made it to our Soho hotel. Dieter and I stood leaning against the check-in desk waiting as they looked up our room reservations. We were pretty much dead on our feet by this point and hoping to get at least a few good hours of sleep in before we had to head over to Studio 8H for Dieter to start digging into his SNL duties. The lady behind the desk finally turned her attention back to us, sliding our room keys over along with some paperwork for Dieter to sign. 

The desk clerk smiled, before going into her spiel about the hotel amenities. Dieter waved her off, “I’m sorry, we’ve just gotten off a five hour flight. We really just wanna sleep right now.”

Her smile widened, “Totally understandable Mr. Bravo. So, you’ll be staying in the South Loft on the 16th floor. The elevators are just over there.” She paused, motioning with her hand. “Do you need help with your bags?” She asked. 

This woman’s full attention was on Dieter. Not that I blamed her, but damn. I was standing here too. I tapped on the countertop, “I’m sorry, but where will my room be?” I asked impatiently. 

Her smile faltered somewhat as she looked between us, “Well, you’re both in the South Loft.” I felt the color drain from my face before she even finished the sentence. I’m so fucked.

Next: Week 5 (Part 1)

A/N: Happy Friday my lovelies! I hope you enjoyed the latest installment. I'm sure you did given that Alec is now officially out of the picture. Please do share your feelings on his latest (major) fuck up. How do you feel about how Kat is handling things? She's kind of all over the place with it. We didn't get any of Dieter's POV in this chapter (because it was so fucking long... sorry), but we got a pretty big hint at the end when he realized things were about to change. What do you think was going through his head on that drive to the airport? What about his reaction? Also, now that he knows Alec is out of the picture, fully expect the menace to come out.

Stacia and Joe are of course up to their tricks. How much do you think they know about what's going on with their cast?

Speaking of the cast...WTF is up with Lana? Do you all hate her yet? How do you think she feels about Kat and what Alec did to her?

The next chapter(s) will be focused on Dieter and Kat in NYC preparing for the Rumba and SNL. Let's just say Kat wasn't wrong about the trip changing things between them. 😏

Below is your Jive video for this chapter. It was some nice inspo for Dieter's Elvis dance moves. 🤭

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[vidavalor]

Why does Crowley in season 2 have sideburns and Crowley in season 1 doesn't?🤔🐍

Because he's actually Elvis in S2. It's a theory I've been keeping to myself for awhile now because I was worried people might think I'd lost it but I feel comfortable enough now with all of you to share that I'm 150% sure that this will be revealed midway through 3.04, when Gabriel will return to tell Aziraphale that he forgot to mention it before he left for Alpha Centauri but he's had the real Crowley in a magical cell in Heaven since the end of S1. The one Aziraphale's been sleeping with since then is actually The King in disguise. (Elvis is supernatural so he can shapeshift, obviously, in case you were worried that I didn't think that bit through.)

Upon learning this, Aziraphale will pause, consider, then smirk and wiggle a little bit while making a dirty joke that involves the phrase "burning love", and then politely ask for his actual Crowley back. When Gabriel shrugs and says it's not his department because he doesn't work there anymore, Aziraphale's flaming sword will appear in his hand to match his rage. He'll slay Gabriel like Adam did the lion outside of Eden (because parallels, you guys...). The King-- who really didn't want to be a part of this and doesn't want to go on together with suspicious minds with anyone anymore-- chooses redemption, whips out his lethal banana (you gutter brains, it's an actual fucking banana...) and goes with Aziraphale to storm Heaven to rescue Crowley. David Tennant's really going to be stretched thin playing two characters at the same time in S3 atop all the flashbacks but we know he can make it work.

When they finally get through Michael (this takes about 40 seconds), our scrappy gang of Az, Elvis, a pair of ragtime singer ghosts played by Nina Sosanya and Maggie Service, and Crowley's two most emotionally damaged plants find the real Crowley curled up in the fetal position singing "All Shook Up" to himself (he and Elvis are permanently psychically linked now but don't worry, it's not a big deal, just a callback to the fly) and the dramatic score swells as Aziraphale rushes over and finally lays one on the real Crowley.

Aziraphale then recaps S2 to the real Crowley, who just stares. The only thing he reacts to is learning that Elvis snogged his girl. In a fit of rage, he has the Maggie and Nina ragtime ghosts (who are also angels, it's complicated) make him holy water and then hurls it at the demonic King of Rock 'n Roll, who lives long enough to sing: "Lord, Almighty, I feel my temperature risin'" before being eviscerated.

We might expect Frances McDormand to return here for this but she doesn't. We will be left wondering why The Voice of God didn't even show up to respond to the dying King and what that meant.

Except remember when I said that Crowley and Elvis were psychically linked?! Yeah. Crowley starts to die and Aziraphale sobs because, really, this was all very avoidable. This is when we all get wibbly because "A Nightingale Sings in Berkeley Square" covered by AI replicating the voice of Elvis plays as Crowley begins to draw the last breath he doesn't need to take. He dies. We're all sobbing. But it's okay because, as the final credits roll, Lord Beezlebub then appears, looks at the ridiculous mess in front of them, just says "this is so dumb", and then zaps Crowley back to life.

I don't know about you all but that really seems the most logical explanation to me. Especially since the alternative is just: "because he felt like it."