#the most obscure niche joke

[shapeshiftersvt]

Today, Shapeshifters is officially

[watatsumiis]

Being A Part of the Sumeru Squad!

I've been thinking a lot recently about being a part of the ‘in’ group in Sumeru - the ones shown to be good friends on screen already (Tighnari, Cyno, Al Haitham and Kaveh!) I feel like there's lots of ways one could slot themselves into the dynamic and it's just very pleasant and fun to think about. 

(Rambles below the cut. Platonic stuff, reader is referred to as ‘you’ and is entirely gender neutral) 

Though the squad is almost constantly making playful little jabs at one another, bickering back and forth and whatnot, they're overall a pretty supportive and kind group and accept you into their midst without too much fuss. 

You soon find yourself invited to a myriad of small, casual get-togethers where the group catches up with one another. It's kind of weirdly formal at first, with so many of them holding such high and important statuses. 

Luckily, Kaveh also ends up feeling pretty left out during these discussions, so you'll have someone to chat with or ask questions when you've lost track of the topic at hand. Plus, he's often got some very funny (and surprisingly astute) commentary to add on, even when the subject is painfully dull. 

Once all the politics are out of the way, the conversation tends to ease right up for a little while. Regardless of whether you're at some restaurant or cafe, or just hanging out at someone's house, there's usually snacks available and things will remain super lighthearted for a bit, all jokes and talks of recently released books or occasional infodumps about hyperfixations and special interests. 

On that subject, whenever the stars align and two or more group members have the same special interest or hyperfixation, hoo boy, you can expect them to monopolise the conversation and somehow always drag it back to whatever niche fascinations that they may have accrued lately. 

If you have something you want to talk about, you can rest assured that at least one person in the room will be able to engage. Everybody has their own collection of equally specific and obscure knowledge - with the occasional kind of hilarious overlap. Kaveh and Cyno’s shared fascination with Fontanian machinery, or Tighnari and Al-Haitham’s in-depth discussions of insectoid languages and their potential overlap with human ones are some of the first to come to mind. 

Of course, disagreements do break out every now and then - but everyone is fairly civil for the most part, if a little bit overdramatic and occasionally loud. It's interesting to see how everyone the group tends to take sides almost as soon as a hint of a possible disagreement rears its head. Al-Haitham once questioned Cyno's sense of humour, querying whether it could really be considered comedy if nobody was laughing, and pretty soon, Tighnari and Kaveh were arguing along as passionately as if they'd been personally insulted. 

You tend to be the tiebreaker more often than not - with such an evenly split group, there often tends to be an even balance between whatever arguments. It doesn't help that Al-Haitham likes to break it all down and give pros and cons for both sides (while still keeping his own stance firm), which may make it impossible for you to decide. 

Luckily, it's easy enough for you to guide the group's attention elsewhere. Just offer to make them some hot drinks or ask if someone wants to play a round of Genius Invocation, and it's like the argument never happened at all. 

It's easy to wind up feeling a little out of place in a group of such highly ranking people, but it's like your friends develop a sixth sense for when you're starting to get a little confused or feeling out of your depth. Instead of poking fun at you (like they do for Kaveh), they'll find a way to rope you into the conversation that doesn't put too much pressure on you. Cyno and Tighnari, especially, seem to have a way of relating things to subjects that are in your area of expertise to help you parse them better so you can find your footing and be debating back and forth with the rest of them. 

Game nights tend to get really intense. It's not a case of if someone will flip their lid, it's simply a case of when. Alliances and subsequent betrayals are all too common, and you'll often find yourself being bribed to help someone one-up another person. 

They even have a ‘trophy’ for winning each week's game night. It's a tiny crown, carved out of wood and painted gold. Collei made it and donated it to the group. Whoever possesses the crown also possesses the ultimate bragging rights until the next gaming night (or until they accidentally sit on it and squash it with their big clumsy butt. Kaveh ). 

Though the group is chaotic, noisy, and constantly teasing one another, they're all so supportive of one another and will stick together through thick and thin. As the conversations slow down, sometimes some pretty serious subjects get brought up, heavy venting and other such similar things. 

Though, they're all very understanding if someone isn't in the correct headspace for that sort of talk, and will happily postpone it or talk about it elsewhere if needed. They're also very used to multiple conversations happening at once, so it's easy enough for someone to dodge around the heavy topics if they need to. 

The squad can be almost violently supportive at times. Sometimes you worry that Cyno may be one hundred percent genuine about abusing his status as the General Mahamatra to threaten somebody who mildly inconvenienced you one time in the market last week. 

Overall, the vibes of the friend group are super fun (if a little intense at times). They may not say it directly, but everyone is super glad to have you around, hanging out with them and getting in on all the goofs they make and shaking up their dynamic a little bit.

Please don't repost, steal, copy or otherwise plagiarise my writing! I do not consent for my works to be translated and posted elsewhere, or copy - pasted into bot or AI technology.

[canmom]

Hello! I absolutely love your blog, everything from your festival recounts to animation analysis and programming (one of tumblr's recommended posts was the one where you made your own rasteriser, and I liked your attitude in what I've read so much that I'm gonna attempt to conquer my 3-year-long grudge against using opengl during college and do something similar now that I'm a bit older and have no deadlines :D).

But anyway, I have 2 questions (sorry if there's easily accessible answers, tumblr search is not helping): 1. During your animation nights, does the screen stay black while everyone watches their own video while you provide commentary? I haven't caught any yet but maybe someday! And 2. do you have any youtube channels or just one-off video essays that you like that also cover animation/directors? Or, even programming lol.

Sorry for the long ask have a nice day!

hiii! i'm very touched that you like my dorky eclectic blog <3

For the Animation Nights, I just stream the video over Twitch from local sources on my computer, typically by playing the video in mpv and recording it in OBS. This is obviously not ideal from a video quality perspective, but it's the easiest way to watch video in sync without making everyone download files in advance. Then we all chat in the Twitch chat box (in large part to crack stupid jokes, it's not that highbrow lmao). I've gotten away with it so far!

As for youtube channels, I can recommend...

anime production/history (i.e. sakuga fandom)

SteveM is likely the most sakuga-fan affiliated anituber. He makes long, well-researched and in-depth videos on anime history, usually themed around a particular director or studio.

Pyramid Inu might be my fave anituber - very thoughtful analysis of Gundam, obscure mecha anime and oldschool BL and similar topics. tremendously soothing voice too.

The Canipa Effect does excellent deep dives into the production of specific shows, both western and anime. I appreciate the respect he gives to the Korean animators of shows like AtlA in particular!

Sean Bires's 2013 presentation on sakuga is pretty foundational to this whole subcultural niche, and a great place to get an introduction to the major animator names to know and significant points in the history of anime. unfortunately a couple of the segments got slapped down by copyright but the rest holds up!

animation theory (for animators and aspirants)

I'm going to focus here on resources that are relevant to animation in general, and 2D animation. if I was going to list every Blender channel we'd be here all week :p

New Frame Plus is one of the best channels out there for game animation, describing in tightly edited videos how animation principles work in a game context and analysing the animation of various games. highly recommend

Videogame Animation Study is similar, examining the animation of specific games in detail

the 'twelve principles of animation' (defined by Disney's Ollie Johnston and Frank Thomas) remain the standard approach to animation pedagogy; there are various videos on them, but Alan Becker (of Animator vs Animation) has quite a popular series. I haven't actually watched these but many people swear by them! Dermot O'Connor expands the list to 21. Note that some of the terminology can be a little inconsistent between different animators - c.f. 'secondary motion'...

Dong Chang is an animator at Studio NUT, who produces a lot of fantastic, succinct videos on standard techniques in the anime industry, timesheet notations, etc. etc. Studio Bulldog, a small anime studio, are a good complement; they focus more on douga than genga and are generally a bit more traditional.

programming

big topic here, I'm going to focus on game dev and tech art since that's my field. but also some general compsci stuff that's neat

SimonDev - graphics programmer with a bunch of AAA experience, fantastic explanations of advanced optimisations and some of the more counterintuitive aspects of rendering

Acerola - graphics programmer who makes very detailed guides to a variety of effects with a very rapid and funny 'guy that has seen monogatari' editing style. When he's good, he's really good. His video on water is probably the best one I've seen (though I can recommend a couple of others).

TodePond - the most charming, musical videos about recursion and cellular automata you've ever seen. less programming tutorial and more art in themselves.

Ben Eater - known for his breadboard computer series, a fantastic demonstration of how to go from logic gates up to the 6502 with actual hardware. worth watching just for how clean he puts the wires on his breadboards like goddamn man

Sebastian Lague, Useless Game Dev - both do 'coding adventure' style videos where they spend a few weeks on some project and then document it on Youtube, resulting in a huge library of videos about all sorts of fascinating techniques. great to dive into

Freya Holmér - creator of the 'shapes' library, makes videos on mathematical programming, with gorgeously animated vector graphics. Her video on splines is a particular treat.

There are definitely many more channels I can recommend on these subjects, but I'll need to dig into my history a bit - unfortunately I need to rush out right now, but hopefully that should be good to be getting going with!

[helloitsbees]

nothing brings me as much joy as someone being so fandom-pilled that they tag or caption the most niche, obscure in-joke with "someone has probably already done this". no i don't think someone has drawn herbert west in the huge david bryne suit already but i want so badly to live in the world where you're the sixteenth person to have thought of that exact concept

[makoredeyes]

Hello, I hope you're doing well! This is probably an odd question, feel free to ignore it. I wanted to ask you as a fellow writer I admire, who is mostly focused on unpopular/dead/deep lore characters. Do you also sometimes feel like what you're writing is irrelevant and unexciting for everyone, except yourself? If so, how do you deal with this? For me sometimes this sudden realization is so crushing, that I cannot bring myself to finish a single work.

Hello! That’s not an odd question at all in fact it feels pretty relevant tbh. (Omg sorry long reply you got me going 💙)

I think I have several kind of interrelated answers for you so let me lay them out.

1- I am powered by autism and a MIGHTY hyperfixation. I have no choice I am compelled. I am blinded to all other things and so while the little bit of feedback that I do get is AMAZING and so extra sparkly motivating it is not entirely what compels me (but BOY does it help)

2- I joked with a friend just last night that, “this season is, as usual, does not have NEARLY enough Felwinter content and so I must therefore create my own.” - as she pointed out, there have been exactly TWO seasons with ANY Felwinter content at all and I wasn’t playing destiny yet for one of them. My point being, sometimes you gotta create what you want to see yourself. I’ve always found myself in some really niche corner of whatever fandom I’m in and have to do this a lot. Probably how I got to writing and drawing etc. fun thing is tho you find a really special group of people who think and love like you that way, and if it’s a smaller crowd, it’s all the more intimate for it Imo. I’ve made some super special friends in the last 9 months or so in my weird little corner here and it’s magical and I think that quality over quantity filter is awesome. (But yeah i know the validation machine is SO good too)

3- the BEST magic of borrowing from obscure content, generally unknown or undeveloped characters or lore is the creative freedom. The headcannon swapping the worldbuilding the background gathering… the RESEARCH! Gleaning what little bit I can from what we DO have. Who the fuck is timur?! We don’t know. I borrowed the beautiful designs for his face and general personality that Sylenth has developed because she’s done such an amazing job and was kind enough to allow me to play with him as she made him, and took that as jump off point for my writing etc but I have all the wiggle room in the world with but a few widely dispersed canon signposts to lead my direction and that is just so fucking fun for me.

(And that doesn’t mean more mainstream characters like Osiris don’t have their creative appeal to me either. I will deep dive on lore and character analysis for YEARS but living in the peripherals is comfy for me)

Those are all the positives to my work, but yeah, sometimes I do feel a little dejected. I have definitely felt a drop off in reader response weirdly in converse to the effort I put into my writing. Housefire has evolved into much more of a cohesive Plot(tm) that is going somewhere very specific from its origin of a few interlinked fluffy anecdotes and funnily enough about the time I started really digging my heels in and plotting and planning and putting in twists I was REALLY excited about, people started responding less. Some of my favorite fics are the least popular. Some of my art I am most proud of gets the least attention but that damn doodle of poor Felwinter getting splattered by a warsat has 200+ more notes than my next most popular art. (The shitposts always win Damnit! 😩🤣😅)

I get frustrated and yeah sometimes a bit discouraged sometimes and I spend Way Too Much time sitting here refreshing my notes because I am a sad lonely person chronically online just way too thirsty for a little validation or a conversation with someone but like. Every piece gets better. Every piece SOMEONE appreciates. Every piece **I** enjoy and is also a chance for all of that when I share it with the world and that’s exciting and good, and like I said the people in this community as niche and little as it is, are really something special, and some of the people that have come into my circle because of it make it SO worth it.

**I was done but then I read your ask one more time and I’ll add this since it popped into my head last-second:

If we are creating works for dead characters we love, we are keeping them alive.

How magical is that??

[oscconfessions]

TRANSFEM TISSUES PROPAGANDA ATTACK!!!

why do another nonbinary arc when you can do the transfems justice? sure, we already have lightbulb, but lightbulb happened in between seasons and it was never even canonized! wouldn’t it be great to finally make the transfems happy and give the world an actual transfem arc?

tissues is easily one of the contestants i have the most problems with. firstly— the way their sickness is made fun of when it’s genuinely a disability. let’s add more to this walking ableist stereotype and build on that! make them have niche interests— since they’d probably be bedridden a lot, maybe make them a super geeky person! make them like fandoms and spending their time drawing fanart for their favorite shows— make them have super geek freakouts when they learn someone else has heard of their favorite obscure anime!! make them an enjoyer of horror media, or make them an otaku!! make them indulge in media so that they can imagine themselves in a world where no one makes fun of them for their condition!

my next point is to make them have an arc where people realize that there’s more to them! have one of the new contestants reach out despite their illness! make them learn all about who tissues is, make them learn about tissues’ rich inner worlds that they’ve built up to escape the reality of their sickness. make them become really close with tissues and make them share their interests with them as well. make them open up to eachother— i could see this happening with cabby or clover, maybe even tea kettle! …and then have one of the older contestants refer to tissues as “the sick one”, or some other dismissive term that references only their condition. make tissues’ friend angry at that contestant for only seeing tissues for their disability, make them yell at that contestant and let them fucking rant. and make tissues be in the background, hearing all this and realizing that they… really don’t deserve to be treated like that, do they? make them realize that all this time they’ve been trying to escape when in reality, they can stand up and fight. just like their favorite heroes do. just like their friend did for them.

(btw its very important that their friend is a girl i should mention this)

let them get more confident over time, starting with them glaring at people who joke about their condition. then have it escalate into them taking a stand against anyone who says mean shit against them— have them tell people off for being ableist fucks (not words used in the show most likely) and make their friend be proud of it. make them grow closer with their friend over the course of the show, and have a scene where the two are alone. tissues would ask “…what’s it like to be a girl?” their friend would be a bit confused, but would explain it to the best of their ability. “…huh.” their friend asks why they asked “…i know… that some people don’t feel like the gender they were born with… and i always kind of identified with that.” “i was wondering because… because i felt strange about being a man. and i… i feel exactly like what you said.” Have their friend realize that. oh this guy is a girl actually. Have them offer the best advice they can, whether it be analytical or motherly or even a little awkward. and i want tissues to feel inspired to change. i want tissues’ title to change from The Sickness to The Adapter. someone who can change and grow no matter the situation— if only they try.

please consider this

-🥜🪶

.

[eoieopda]

[ateez as tinder dudes]

this is a joke, but i’m also convinced that i’m correct, so… there’s that. also, don’t look at me, incorporating a fourth (FOURTH!!!) group on my blog. i don’t want to talk about it 🫣

hongjoong

he’s treating this like a portfolio. he’s got the max number of pics uploaded, and they’re all editorial, like he’s expecting to be scouted. is he repping a brand? is he just flexing that he’s got better style than you ever will? he knows this is tinder, right? no.

absolutely no bio, whatsoever. his age isn’t even listed, somehow. you know nothing about him except that he owns more than one cowboy hat, and honestly? that’s all you need to know.

you’re actually 98.4% sure that he’s a catfish — who just looks like that? — but that’s not going to stop you from swiping right to see if he did, too.

he did not.

seonghwa

he’s intentionally using pics of him with his mother, with kids, with small animals, etc. because he’s calculating. couldn’t be more of a targeted attack if the profile was computer-generated. frankly, you can’t say if it was or wasn’t. suspiciously perfect.

that’s where the tinder prowess stops. he doesn’t know how the swiping feature works so he’s swiped right on everyone. oops.

his bio has subsections — plural — with endearingly dorky interests laid out in full. he’s well-rounded and objectively attractive to literally all people. man is everybody’s type, esp. yours.

tragically, he has never once responded to a message, and he never will.

yunho

he must’ve made this as a joke, right? every picture of him is hilariously unflattering or a recreation of a meme or some childhood photo, except the last one — which is a meme. it’s something obscure that appeals to the sense of humor of exactly .01% of the population. you can tell by looking at him that he is chronically online and had unrestricted internet access as a kid.

his bio is also absurd. this dude has something like “my first words were, ‘this human form is limiting’”, and it’s extremely polarizing. on purpose. puts his whole personality right there, right from the get-go because it will ward the wrong people off and flag down the exact niche he’s targeting.

i feel like he’s either a lukewarm conversationalist that makes you wonder how the rest of his profile was so funny, or the first conversation is an incredible, god-tier bit — and then, when the bit runs its course, you realize that he deleted his profile, never to be seen again.

rip

yeosang

all of his pictures paint an image of someone hard and edgy, and you’ve got it all wrong. you’ve been fully bamboozled, bestie. that is a whole ass fairy princess.

always messages first and/or responds immediately, revealing that he’s the most “uwu” person of all time. seriously, what the fuck? people unironically use “hehehe”? in this day and age? ^_^

unexpected gem. the person he actually is isn’t someone you would normally shoot your shot with, but you’re not mad about it.

one of the rare few on the app who would rather die than find a hookup (the idea makes him itchy, okay?) but he will actually seek and find a future spouse, just watch.

san

most of his photos are of him and his friend (it’s wooyoung. of course it’s wooyoung), and the subtext is so confusing that you can’t tell if they’re looking for a third or are just guys being buds ??? what is happening, and why are you so into it?

the photos that don’t include his friend (boyfriend? seriously, what is going on there?) are all action shots because he needs you to know that he is athletic and built. you do not need to wonder what he looks like naked because he’s not wearing a shirt in any of them.

he’s got the stock photo equivalent of a bio. most uninteresting thing you’ve ever seen, so you do not hit him up.

you should have :( you would’ve loved him.

mingi

i regret to inform you that this man has the most cringeworthy online presence of all time. god, he’s so fuckboi-coded!! and you hate him for it, but you hate yourself even more for being into because you sure are, diva!!!

i feel like the song on his profile is extremely questionable, either because it’s some bizarre, ambient instrumental; by someone that’s been justifiably cancelled and you don’t know whether or not he knows that; or worse, it’s his own.

all of his pictures are group pictures. you cannot tell for the life of you which one of them he is, requiring you to go to the instagram he’s referenced in his bio — which is exactly the point. the instagram links to his soundcloud because it can get worse.

if you actually bite the bullet and respond to his shitty pick-up line, he’s the bbygirl to end all bbygirls. absolute heart of gold. you almost want to smack him for being so bad at marketing himself.

get him a PR person to straighten his shit out; mingi is fired.

wooyoung

this motherfucker has deleted and remade his profile 8,000 times because he needs to “reset his matches” aka has spent every waking moment swiping.

he probably pays for tinder so he can swipe in other locations — not because he’s looking for anyone, but because he wants people to look at him.

you have to wonder who took the photos because they’re sure as shit not selfies but they’re all vaguely chic thirst traps (it was san. of course it was san.)

when it comes to messages, he either communicates exclusively with emojis or gifs, or he only responds to compliments. small talk? NOPE. tell him he’s pretty or get out :’)

if you do wind up linking (because the whole conversation thing is a lost cause), he’s insane. you’ll spend one night with him, never see him again, and you will remember him on your deathbed.

was he a ghost or a fever dream? you’ll never know.

jongho

he’s only here because his friends made him, and he will make that crystal clear. nothing else will be, though. he’s either got an extremely dry sense of humor + is deeply ironic, or he’s genuinely that odd.

all of his photos are identical selfies (expression, location, angle, etc.) and the only difference is the shirt he’s wearing. is…. is that on purpose? is he being funny, or is he seriously that much of a cartoon character? WHO KNOWS.

tbh, he’s the dude that makes a profile, finds an IRL partner immediately, and totally forgets he has a profile because he deleted the app ages ago. this is tragic; he would’ve been just your type.

message him all you want, bestie. it won’t work.

[submalevolentgrace]

hey videogames enjoyers, play a little 'what if?' game with me.

imagine an alternate timeline where the modern first person shooter didn't and doesn't exist. no call of duty, no titanfall, no borderlands, no bioshock, no pubg, no overwatch, not even halflife. they never existed. there was however still a small experimental game way back in the 80's called 'wolfenstein 3d' that basically nobody remembers, leaving pretty much no cultural impact or legacy on the gaming landscape. and sure, around y2k if you fell down some very specific internet forum rabbit holes you'd find a small niche community playing some equally obscure successors inspired by wolfenstein: doom, quake, hexen, and some weird one called rise of the triad; 'wolfensteinies', the community called them, in honour of the original. most gamers would be put off by their confusing and frustrating mechanics, but of course, everyone that stuck around long enough to really get into one of these cult-canonical 'big four' in the genre was captivated by them. people in this tiny community loved their wolfensteinies so much that it was a (true) running joke that basically everyone was trying to make their own version of one.

but if you played these unknown games, or even just attempted to describe their characteristics to other gamers, they'd look at you like you were insane. who'd play games like that? they have such ugly primitive graphics, and you just shoot people with bullets that come out of your eyes somehow and you have to keep picking up fuel for the shooting, and the enemies shoot you back, and you're stuck in some kind of unfathomable maze and have to keep walking and opening doors until you find your way out, and you keep having to shoot at enemies the whole time while running out of shooting fuel? people play that for fun???

and over the years there were a few attempts at making something approaching this bizarre "shooting people from your eyes and opening lots of doors" kind of gameplay more mainstream for various 16-bit and early 3d consoles… but despite being both faithful to the wolfenstein roots and also bringing something fun and unique to the table, they always did poorly both critically and commercially, even with a big brand tie-in like pokemon or final fantasy attached, so were forgotten.

and the genre of wolfensteinies died out.

but then, something unusual happens in the early-to-mid 2010's; the indie game scene kinda explodes, and goes fully mainstream. it's never been easier to get your game up on steam or even a console's digital store, and with the boom in experimental indie games playing around with what's possible, a new type of game - a whole new genre! - blasts onto the scene: the "wolfensteinie". nobody seems to know where the genre or name came from, but suddenly every other indie game that comes out is a wolfensteinie or has wolfensteinie-style mechanics in it. mainstream gamers and fans of this brand new genre have still never heard of quake or doom let alone the original, but 'wolfensteinie' popularity has skyrocketed. confusingly, however, all these indie darling wolfensteinie games - that are ostensibly drawing inspiration from wolfenstein 3d or else why would they still be calling themselves wolfensteinies - none of them are really first person shooters… the first person shooter still doesn't exist, or at least hasn't for decades. some of these games have a first person viewpoint but most don't, many have guns in them but many don't, a few of them take place in mazey castles i guess, but it honestly kinda seems like none of the people making these games have ever even heard of wolfenstein 3d or the big classic wolfensteinies.

so what even makes a modern game a wolfensteinie then, if none of them are fps's? well it's the coloured keycards and dogfood, duh! that's what wolfensteinies are all about! you collect coloured keycards to unlock the respective coloured doors, and there is dogfood that you can eat. everyone knows that's what a game means when it says it has 'wolfensteinie mechanics' in it! and since these mechanics are so popular, game designers want to put them into as many of their games as possible. an action adventure wolfensteinie with soulslike combat, a dungeon crawling dating sim with wolfensteinie mechnics, an island hopping life sim wolfensteinie! although as the genre has broadened its appeal, the mechanics have obviously been softened a bit for the average gamer; it's generally accepted that painting over keycards to open unmatched doors and storing dogfood as an inventory item for later instead of having to eat straight from the bowl still let a game count as a wolfensteinie, or at least 'wolfensteinish'.

the word 'wolfenstein' is still literally in the title of the genre, but its roots and history and identity have been so unrecognisably mangled that most people seemingly don't even question where the name came from, whether this 'wolfenstein' thing might have originally been its own unique game, with its own unique mechanics almost completely unexplored in the modern genre. what would fans say of the original genre-defining game?

"eww, that's so ugly and basic, we have way better games now with keycards and dogfood in them, if opening doors in a maze is what you find fun gameplay."

imagine that world. no first person shooters are made, but the market is absolutely flooded with indie games - and AAA titles now too! - all proudly claiming lineage from wolfenstein 3d, all absolutely certain that what makes them part of that lineage is coloured keycards and dogfood. imagine the absurdity. imagine you were one of those big four cult fans from back in the day, struggling to even find a copy of 'doom community support edition' that can run on a modern operating system, while fans of keycard and dogfood games think you're nuts for wanting to play something as obscure, bespoke, ugly and just plain uninspired as doom.

imagine that reality. keycards and dogfood being the cultural legacy of first person shooters.

because, yeah, this post is an old gamer's lament for the absurd reality that exists with a little genre that for some reason is still called 'roguelikes'.

rogue? nethack, angband, linley's dungeon crawl, adom? a massive amount of complexly interactive elements allowing for inventive solutions and emergent gameplay unlocked through iterative knowledge and creative thinking of available tools? people play that for fun???

"eww, that's so ugly and basic, we have way better games now with permadeath and procedural generation in them, if playing the same bits over and over and over is what you find fun gameplay."

[dailycharacteroption]

Races Among the Stars 8: Kobolds

And we end off this week’s special with your, mine, and the internet’s favorite: Kobolds. Those delightful little draconic scamps that have wormed their way into our hearts (and other bodily organs) over the years.

Kobolds weren’t initially in Starfinder officially, partially because when the system first launched, the writers had trouble finding a niche for them in the setting that already had so many small-sized lovable scamp species in it, ranging from old classics like gnomes and halflings, to the recently promoted core option of the ysoki, and of course the Pathfinder staple of goblins, it’s hard to justify yet another such species, or so goes the claim. Personally the fact that there’s literally a planet in the Pact Worlds with an entire continent of dragon-ruled nation-states seemed like the perfect basis for me, but that is just my two cents.

In any case, kobolds are back, first appearing in the Alien Character Deck along with other Golarion staples, and later being expanded upon in Interstellar Species!

But kobolds have changed a bit in the millennia since the days of Pathfinder, so let’s go over that real quick-like!

When the Gap ended, kobolds were… conspicuously absent from the multiverse, and many assumed that they shared the same fate as the missing world of Golarion.

However, a century later (which is still several centuries before the current point in the timeline), the first experiments with witchwarping magic began, and while those first forays mostly brought into existence strange machines that seemed to be non-functional within the constraints of local physics and reality, with them came reptilian humanoids which were apparently, by all analysis and their own admission, the missing kobolds, leading to an entire population of them inhabiting Absalom Station and beyond.

Where things get especially strange, however, is the effect these first-generation kobolds had on reality. They had in their possession keys to empty apartments that somehow nobody had noticed before, credentials for jobs that seemed not to exist before. It was as if reality was bending to give the kobolds a place in the world. Whether this place was folded into the main reality when they arrived or existed before and was obscured is another mystery.

It seems apparent that during the Gap, kobold-kind, or at least some of it, saw whatever even the Gap obscures coming and use advanced reality warping technology and magic to shunt themselves off into a pocket reality somewhere between another universe and a demiplane, perhaps the border of the main one, until the event had past and further witchwarping events and experiments called them back. Of course, wherever they were, they did not escape the effects of the Gap itself, and have no memory of that time.

The result is an origin that is one part an excellent way to give kobolds a new refreshing backstory in this far-future age, as well as a funny meta-joke about literally injecting kobolds back into the setting.

However, it should be noted that while that first generation warped reality around themselves, kobolds born into the setting’s universe properly have not manifested nearly as many strange, reality warping events, though the secrets of witchwarping are now heavily associated with kobolds in the same way that draconic power and magic is.

Starfinder-era kobolds were introduced after Pathfinder Second Edition came out, meaning that they have the distinctive appearance from that edition, which I was not a fan of, but the design has grown on me over time.

Kobold are small reptiles with somewhat oversized craniums covered in scales that come in a variety of colors ranging across the rainbow and even rare metallic shades, reflecting the traditional colors of chromatic and metallic dragons and plenty in-between. Additionally, they also possess horns, most commonly two oversized backwards-sweeping ones, though some sport up to 8 smaller horns. They also possess sharp teeth and a long tail for counterbalancing their craniums, though their small size and unimpressive physiques usually make these unappealing options for self-defense.

It is also notable that most kobolds also go through rare periods of flux, their bodies changing as the witchwarping magic that infuses them makes changes. Usually these are benign, things like bouts of nausea, developing a new allergy or repelling pathogens, but others are more extreme, manifesting dramatic spell effects. The most disruptive are thankfully rare, but aspiring witchwarpers use them as the basis for their magic, developing and controlling these warps.

Kobolds are a communal species, and so they often seek to aid their communities whenever possible, and a kobold child can be expected to be raised not just by their parents but by the whole community. However, kobolds also have a deep pride as a people, stemming from the truth that they know in their heart of hearts: kobolds are dragons, and the fact that their forms a diminutive and weak is one of the universe’s great injustices. Plenty believe that in whatever reality they were in before returning, they wore the mighty shape of true dragons, while others believe that this is a convenient folktale. Either way, this has birthed several philosophies, including those that seek to unlock their draconic heritage, those that seek to reclaim the power and wealth they believe they deserve, and of course those that seek to ignore all that and just live their lives in the reality they find themselves in.

Kobolds are agile and passionate, but frail.

That being said, their scales provide some decent protection in a pinch.

With their keen minds, these tiny reptiles have a special knack for engineering and physics, true to their long history of trap and weapon building.

The colors of a kobold’s scales are not just for show. Indeed, that coloration indicates some genetic similarities with various forms of dragon, granting them resistance to acid, cold, electricity, of flame to match.

Kobolds have a lot of fun options as characters. Their charisma and association with the art makes them excellent witchwarpers, not to mention other charisma classes like solarian, envoy, and the like. Their agility also makes them good picks for operatives as well as most any ranged combat build, including ranged soldiers, evolutionists (particularly those seeking a draconic form), and so on. Their love of building and intricate devices also makes mechanic and technomancer thematic choices as well, and biohackers might seek to unlock the secrets of dragonhood in their genetics. They also have a history of magic, making mystic and especially precog good choices as well. Their only real weakness seems to be their con, making nanocyte, vanguard, and any especially tanky builds somewhat difficult, but not impossible. Additionally, beyond classes, the Interstellar Species book has lots of feats meant to represent kobolds unlocking their draconic potential, ranging from wings, a breath weapon, and outright gaining a draconic alternate form!

And that’s it for this week! Through a curious accident of how I’ve been picking which species to cover, this week has been mostly species that are relics of the fantasy origins of the setting, which is neat to point out. Regardless, I hope you enjoyed it, and look forward to more options next week!

[tequiilasunriise]

Random canonshipping headcanons because I’m invested in this crackship:

Instead of common petnames such as ‘babe’ or ‘darling’, Perrin affectionately calls Viola ‘shutterbug’ bc DUH meanwhile Viola gives me ‘my muse’ vibes but also ‘ma cherie’ because French™️

Viola’s lockscreen is a quick phone pic she took of Perrin’s intensely focused face as she’s about to take a photo of some passerby Santalune Forest Pokémon, but the best part is Viola’s vivillon being casually perched on Perrin’s head the entire time kinda like a comically oversized bow

What can I say when you’re a Pokémon photographer you get used to staying extremely still as not to spook your subject, and sometimes you just get used to becoming a perch fer wild Pokémon who mistake you as a funky looking tree

In this case Viola’s ace just really likes to vibe with her trainer’s girlfriend and Perrin is more than happy with the arrangement even if she doesn’t notice the giant butterfly perched on her half of the time because yeah she’s just used to being a makeshift tree fer randomass mons

Perrin’s lockscreen is a photo she took on her camera of a victorious Viola leaping with joy and a jubilant sparkle in her eye after a hard fought gym battle against a tough opponent she had narrowly beat, the vibrant gym leader celebrating with her vivillon is defo one of Perrin’s favorite pics ever

Yes Perrin loves to photograph Pokémon, but her gym leader girlfriend in action is a very, very close second when it comes to favorite subjects

When it comes to how they met in the first place, I like to think Perrin travels around the world photographing a variety of Pokémon, and when she heard of a Kalosian gym leader who was also a Pokémon photographer specializing in bug types girly just had to visit the region and check her work out

They met in a gallery showcasing Viola’s latest collection of photos, and hit it off real quick with their shared love of capturing the hearts of Pokémon in a single snap (infodumping to each other bout their fave photographers, techniques, praising the other’s work, etc etc)

You know inside jokes with the homies that require seven layers of context and a highly specific sense of humor? Besides a love Pokémon photography itself, Perrin and Viola bond over photographer memes that only they understand like anyone who would overhear the conversation would be so fucking confused

Like, their Pokégram dms are just filled with spamming the other really niche photographer memes/reels because meme spamming is its own love language

Need Viola taking Perrin as her plus one to some Kalos Pokémon League event and Perrin to make some obscure reference that sends the bug type specialist giggling and Korrina leans over to Grant to playfully stage whisper, “Damn, you never made her laugh like that when you two were dating” and Grant would roll his eyes as he goodnaturedly shoves off Korrina and mutter something about weird photographer humor

Grant and Viola as besties who tried dating but found they were better as homies and Grant wingmanning Viola when she was mad crushing on this traveling photographer can I get an amennnnn

Jokes on her while Viola was meticulously planning how she’s going to rizz up this baddie with box dye, Perrin thought they were already dating and Viola preferred to take it slow because useless sapphics <3333

When they’re OFFICIALLY dating not much really changes between the two expect more physical affection (smoochies!!) because ah yes Viola, her calling you all these sweet nicknames and consistently ‘hanging out’ with you all alone at Kalos’ most famous romantic spots is soooo normal gal pal behavior mhm yeah y’all dressing up all cute and stylish to go cafe hopping around Lumiose City was soooo platonic

Perrin and several of Viola’s friends tease the HELL outta her fer this fer pretty much the rest of time but hey!!! Now that the air is cleared, Perrin turns up the blatant flirtiness with her official girlfriend now that she knows Viola is comfortable with going not so slow so to speak >:)))

Rip Santalune City’s gym leader girly got that raging gay panic on a daily basis now

There’s tons of long distance girlfriends shenanigans because Viola has to consistently stay in Kalos to run her gym while Perrin continues her travels, this leads to timezone shenanigans where it’s like three am fer one of them and the other is just casually grabbing brunch but it’s finnneeee gods knows the gays don’t need sleep

Ruining your circadian rhythm fer your gay lover is also a love language guys trust trust trust

Assuming they met and started dating pre-Kalos game events, imagine it’s a videocall that’s like:

“Shutterbug, hey, um, why does every news station say Kalos was hit with a huge mega death ray?”

“Oh yeahhh don’t worry about it the whole thing got resolved by that super tough challenger I told you about a few weeks ago, anyways LOOK at this gorgeous Volcorona I was so lucky to meet today!”

“Viola please- wait those wings are so glossy wow the trainer must be taking such good care of them.”

Perrin says she’s not sure how a single kid can singlehandedly save the whole region from certain doom mixed with legendary Pokémon, the events of the DLC go down (whatever they may be), and then she calls Viola with a, “…okay, okay yeah I get it now.”

Anyways that’s all I got fer now if I decide to make a part two list then yiipppeeeee I love getting invested in total crackships

[lynx-tales]

I thought of the silliest, most niche, and obscure joke on Sunday and it will not leave my head, so here goes.

Someday, I will own two cats. I will name them Vladimir and Estragon. I will tell people that there are actually three cats, and if they wait a little while, they might see Godot.

[solmints-messyocdiary]

"Alice"

There is nothing to say here.

Name: "Alice" Doe

Age: Late 20s. Older than she appears.

Pronouns: She/They/It

Gender: Super cute, amazing, talented bishoujo

Sexuality: Weeb (translation: she doesn't get laid)

Alignment: chaotic neutral

Birthday: February 7

Sign: Aquarius

Birthplace: [ç̸̯̜͕̱̗̾͌̌̇̇̔͗̉̎̚͘e̸̺̖͊͊͆̄̕͝ṅ̴̯̩̪͈̊͂͊̃͂̔͊́́̒́͜s̶̼͕͇̟̯̹̩͈̜̯͗͑͂̍̉̾͘͠ơ̴̡̯̦͎̹̍̈́̽̆̐̓̾̎̕̚͝r̸̝͇̗͔͙̱̲̀͐̉̌̐̈́͐͌̈́͜e̶̢̝̰͖̮̪̿͑̓̊́̍͆̒̈̑͆d̵̢̜͖̺̼̦̟̏̂́͘]

Job: Crime scene cleaner

-

Personality:

Haha... she wants to be liked but left alone at the same time. She finds her personality absolutely unbearable, so she'll try to mold herself in any way you need her to be. She can try and play the part. She tries to act as this wild, lovable, and energetic gal that everyone loves. A manic dream pixie girl to be exact.

However... she is an anxiety-riddled nerd who is hyperactive and can't stay still. "Alice" always tries to crack jokes, sometimes at the most bad timings, to ease down the tension. She hates herself and tends to become extremely depressed when her mood gets bad enough and her social battery is drained. She can also be quite negative, judgemental and cruel in her head.

Being perceived is both terrifying and important for her.

-

Height: 1.64 cm (5'4/5'5" feet)

Weight: It's a se-cret~ 48 kg (106 pounds)

Physical Description: A petite woman with blond-dyed hair and blue tips, her roots can be seen and are a dark brown. Greyish blue eyes with an unnerving stare and nervous smile. She has a pear-shaped body, thick thighs, and a nice butt. Her body is always littered with bandaids or bandages due to her clumsiness or how often she gets into fights. She has a scar on her mouth... she'd rather not say how she got it.

-

Hobbies: surfing the web, watching 4 hours videos on niche/obscure topics, sketching, reading manga, watching anime, playing eroge/horror games, staring into the void

Favorite stories: Bibliomania, Emanon, No Longer Human, Lady K and the Sick Man, Devilman, 1984

Favorite movies: Perfect Blue, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Angel's Egg, Jennifer's Body, Girl Interrupted, American Psycho, Spirited Away, Paprika, Akira

Favorite series: Serial Experiments Lain, Ergo Proxy, Neon Genesis Evangelion, My Dress-up Darling, Gangsta, Zombieland Saga, Magical Girl Site, Sailor Moon, Black Rock Shooter, Ghost in the Shell, Saint Seiya, Elfen Lied

Favorite Videogames: Mario 64, You and Me and Her: A Lovestory (Kimi to Kanojo to Kanojo no Koi), Huniepop, Silent Hill, THE iDOLMaster, Yume Nikki, Needy Streamer Overdose, Jisatsu no Tame no 101 no Houhou, Slow Damage, Subarashiki Hibi

Music Taste: J-pop, J-rock, electronica, eurobeat, vaporwave

-

Loves: solitude

Likes: junk food, Kuromi, physical media, boba tea, manga, Cogimyun, her waifus and husbandos, Dating Sim games, Super Sonico, bootleg figures, horror, deep-dives, horror indie RPGs, cows

Dislikes: boring people, people making fun of her, feeling sad... feel... ing... am I... A̷̳͗m̴̒ͅ ̸͈̐Ĩ̸̠ ̴͚̾r̶͇̔ȇ̴̘ã̴̪l̸̡̆?̸̗͝ ̷̩̈I̴̫̽ ̶̫̊a̸̰͊m̷̯̿ ̸͈͐s̵̭̈́c̴̱̈́a̴̕͜r̷̡̃e̶̦͌d̶̪̽.̷͇͝ ̷̙̒I̵̟͝t̶͍̋ ̶͎͑k̵͉̾e̷̢̿ȩ̴͑p̶̮̚s̵͉͐ ̶̦̕g̷̞̎e̶͊ͅt̶̝̂t̸̘̓ỉ̶͜n̵͉̿g̶̣͗ ̶̳̀ẃ̸̯o̵̜͋r̶̭̈́ṣ̴̄e̷̲͒.̸̯̑ ̸͈͘P̴̼̆l̶̠̈́e̷̖̒a̴̦̒s̸̭̏e̵̠͠.̸͙̀.̸̹̋.̸͇̆ ̶̝̈́p̵̟͝Ĺ̸̼E̴̼̋A̶͖̋S̷̗̈E̶̲͂ ̴̞̈́H̵̫̚Ẻ̶͈L̶̨̕P̶̪̽ ̶̟̍M̵̟͊E̸̛͔.̶̯́

Hates: solitude, herself ḥ̸̡̹̘̭̣̣̬̤͑͗͑͛̒́͗̈́͘̚ĕ̶̞̭̫̑̽̾͌̃̂̒̕̚r̵̛̲̖̙̭̜͙̳̙͚̿̾͌̓̓̀̅ş̵̛͇̜̩̲͓̪̋̌͊̈̉̄̐ȩ̷̡̠͍̥͔̞̼̣̈́ͅļ̶̛͕̱̃̉̎̈́̎͆́͝f̵̡̭̼̦̺̑̀̂̑͘̚͘̚ ̷͖̮̠͂̂͒͌̀͜͝ḧ̵̡̨̜͚͇̟͎͉͇̳̓̂̓̽̀̒ė̷͈̲͕̈́͌͗̍̎̊̕͝r̸̼͚͈̮̓̆̍̇̿́̅ş̷̫̘̰̼͖͖̄ę̸̠̤̼̪̓̒̆̈́͘̚͝l̸̨̧͖̼̰͈̅͆̀̆̃̔̐ͅf̶̙́͒̂͋̂̇̏ ̷̡̘̘͓̖̉͜h̴͓̹͓̭̤̳͚͛͜͠ͅê̵̤͓̖̘̬̭̫͓̒̓͗̈́̕ͅr̵̪͔̝͍͕͖̹̥̹̳̆̐̋͑͒͝͝s̴̫̗͙̈́ͅê̵̡̨̤̩͜l̴̥̈̽̐̾͒͗f̸̳̾̆̐̃͒

-

Extra

Right-handed

"Professional" tummy ache haver

She suffers from anxiety, making her not go out at all to prevent having to interact with others

She's a social smoker but doesn't like to drink alcohol in public

She likes to burn CDs and give them to people she sees as friends. She's surprisingly good at finding songs you might like.

Women make her nervous because she is constantly comparing herself to them

Dissociates... hard. There are times when she can't determine what is real and what is fake

[purplekoop]

Something else I found out while looking into that big Hero 42 theory and all the links supporting it: the wiki is wrong about something! Well. Not wrong entirely, but missed something.

Streamer Mode is a setting made for (you're not gonna believe this) streamers in order to avoid being harassed in-game by stream snipers. Part of what it does is hide the user's in-game name by replacing it with a bunch of randomized options, almost all of which are references to characters, voice lines, in-world factions, community jokes and memes, some community game modes, or even some obscure references, like the name of the mech from Volskaya Industries or... the fact the SFX for the Moira Mythic were made using a glove full of macaroni? The wiki compiles all of these, and it's an astoundingly comprehensive list, with all but a very select few names being given an explanation that's, if not obvious, at least probable.

However, when both looking for reference images for hero 42 and browsing the list myself in response to that theory, I found the wiki misunderstood one reference! Specifically, the explanation for the name xXSwordMadamXx.

From the wiki:

Now, it is qualified with a "possibly", as the only woman with any established sword skill that most players know of in the OW world is Kiriko's mom (the one who trained her and the Shimadas, fearsome enough apparently to even be on Doomfist's radar).

But, believe it or not, there's a character in the world of Overwatch literally just called "Sword Madam", and you've probably seen her in passing if you've played in the past year:

She's one of the fighters advertised on those terminals in New Junk City! Given how other names reference similarly niche map details (like the coffee place or Egg House cafe in New Queen Street) I doubt this means much, but it's still a neat detail. I mean I sure as hell wouldn't complain if I had see more of her, but not getting my hopes up, especially with both how similar she looks to Junker Queen in build and how historically the devs have struggled with melee-only characters.

I don't have a Fandom account (and don't plan to), but if anyone would like to correct this then the "everything must be correct always" freak in me would appreciate if you did it on my behalf. Here's the article in case anyone's curious:

(note that I use a basic URL extension that declutters Fandom wiki articles, so free bonus tip from me: just replace "fandom" with "antifandom" in the URL to make these sites usable!)

[kaladinsspear]

Silly Game Time: What are three things that can reliably make you smile?

My family. I was gonna try to list a specific person, but I can't decide who. I inherited my android sense of humor from my dad, my sister has the best comedic timing of anyone I know, my mom is crazy smart and well educated and loves to use the most obscure niche information to make the goofiest jokes, and my brother is a master at double meanings and unexpected humor. They are all brilliant in their own ways and make me laugh all the time. That's not even mentioning the goofy pets and their antics.

Being outside. Doesn't matter the weather, being outside always makes me happy. I'm really lucky that I get to work outside every day. The other day I got caught in a rainstorm and it was beautiful. I was soaked, but it was beautiful. I have an Instagram account where I post pictures of all the cool bugs, plants, rocks, clouds, etc that I see through the day. I'm on my computer right now, but I'll reblog this with some of my favorite pics when my phone isn't dying.

Music. I actually have 3 years of a degree in vocal performance. I love all kinds of music, and love finding new favorites to listen to (any suggestions?)

[genderkoolaid]

in my brain, the whole "[size] dick energy" thing was always coined to de-stigmatise dick size with the usual help of humour. the sentiment being that it doesn't matter what your actual genital size is, what matters is your energy and how you behave regardless of it.

it's not perfect, no, but it's miles better than just omitting the "energy" part. society has been weird about genital size all along (see: small genitals being desirable in ancient Greece) so acting like it's gonna go away ever or overnight is just. eh.

I don't see where it's realistic to spend so much energy arguing about this as if it's life or death?

I'd rather rejoice that a human trafficker is in custody for reasons of his own making.

How, exactly, does using "small dick" as an insult destigmatize dick size?

You are still associating dick size with worth. Listen to me: your argument is ridiculous.

"You have a small dick" = bodyshaming insult

"You have small dick energy" = destigmatization? Are you being serious right now? Are you seriously trying to argue that slapping "energy" on the end of a bodyshaming insult is destigmatization? Would using "fat energy" as an insult destigmatize fatness? Are you for real right now?

The body part is in the name. Its not like, a code word. It did not come from any sort of attempt to destigmatize small dicks. It could not more clearly be based in the idea that having a big dick is seen as being something cool, powerful, and worthy. That is a basic fact of modern Western culture, and you would have to be wildly disconnected from modern Western culture to think that isn't the reason the jokes became popular in the first place.

It is not "miles better" than without the energy part. It is the exact same. People (transmascs and intersex people especially) who are directly impacted by this, because it is directly mocking our bodies, are saying that this is bodyshaming because it directly leads to our own self-hatred and the undervaluing of our bodies in society. If anything, its helping to continue normalizing this bodyshaming because of people like you, who for some reason that escapes me, think that putting "energy" after bodyshaming negates the bodyshaming.

Also, are you fucking kidding me? Really? "its been around forever so its not gonna go away anytime soon"? Are you really using that tired argument?

I know its been around for a while. I have, in fact, literally said that I don't blame people for using it without realizing its bodyshaming because its so ingrained in our culture and its not a well-known enough issue for the average person to even connect it with bodyshaming. I just want people who hear people explain why its harmful to stop making those jokes and stop defending them. I'm not "acting as if its life or death", I'm just annoyed that people keep making weak arguments about why it Totally Isnt Bodyshaming to avoid doing any self-reflection on how something that you take for granted may actually be harmful and against your own morals.

Which gets on to your final point, which I have also seen @transfaguette get. That we are distracting from the human trafficker getting arrested or something.

Literally the first things I did when I heard the news was make a post celebrating it, and reblogging the actual screenshots, and answering an ask saying that I live for the day Andrew Tate falls into obscurity. I didn't even mention the bodyshaming until someone else brought it up, and I mentioned how I was annoyed with people's lame justifications. But also, in the tags:

#wish greta hadn't used that insult but y'know greater good + i don't entirely blame her for not being aware of a#rather niche viewpoint on it#kinda same w how I feel abt people using empathy to mean compassion/being a good person#like it's not right but it's also not in the public discourse enough#for the avg person to realize why it's harmful

I literally said it was for the "greater good" and that I didn't blame her, or even most people, for using the joke without thinking about the bodyshaming element.

I did and am rejoicing at the human trafficker getting himself arrested in the stupidest way possible. I have been very openly happy about Greta's tweet since I literally first saw it. It is possible for people to both be happy with what happened, and wish that a different joke had been used.

The reason "small dick energy" as a joke is being discussed is because this is an issue I have talked about in the past, and since it was used in a very well-known instance recently, it makes sense to bring it back up since it's already in people's minds. Its not like I completely ignored what happened, or I'm out here saying that the entire thing shouldn't have happened because Greta made a joke I didn't like. I love that what happened, happened, and I continue to be happy about it. I was mildly annoyed she used a small dick joke, and I am far more annoyed with people like you who feel the need to make these weird, flimsy defenses of it?

You are just being actively resistant to the fact that connecting having a small penis, in any way, shape, or form, to being less of a man or worth less as a person or less cool or whatever is bodyshaming and it hurts people. If you can be as creative with your insults as you are with your defenses of bodyshaming, I'm sure you'll be fine.

[obscure-horror-game-protagonist]

BEST OBSCURE(??) HORROR(???) GUY, ROUND 1

SUMMARIES:

David Hoover (The Crooked Man) - Regarding the events of The Crooked Man specifically (not any of the others, sorry idk what happens in them), at the beginning of the game David moves into a new apartment, which turns out to be very haunted. In hopes of finding the previous tenant to ask him about this, David ends up going to various abandoned locations, where he runs into the game's titular scary guy, as well as a different more normal person in each location. Then there's this whole thematic parallels situation where these people he meets have problems reminiscent of his own, and then it turns out that actually the scary guy and the people are all parts of the same guy's ghost (the previous tenant of the apartment) who, due to their similar problems, was haunting David in some sort of attempt to either kill him or to make him get things together and improve his life, which does work out somehow in the game's good ending. I'm skipping a lot of details I know but that's because when I got anymore specific this paragraph ended up extremely long? I can't even mention the other games here or this description for clarity will turn into a damn essay on the guy I'm sorry Most notable trait: When we actually remembered to look him up to make sure he was "obscure" enough for the bracket, it turned out there were actually a lot of posts about him, but we were too far in to replace him so we'll just hope he's niche enough to qualify. If you are a part of his unexpected Tumblr following then do consider this factor when voting.

Arthur Hastings (We Happy Few) - Ok please remember we have to finish writing this description before the 1st so that we can start queuing the posts. We have to. We can't leave it as a note to ourselves to write it later anymore we shouldn't have announced a date before we were actually finished writing these. Barry please don't forget we have to write this. We decided on this format we have to commit to it we can't make one of them just be a joke it wouldn't be fair to the voting process and wouldn't be funny to anyone except us. We already must be on thin ice with the public because of how it turned out we picked a bunch of guys people actually knew just because we didn't want to get 0 votes so they're mostly not even that obscure. Barry I don't even think this one is a horror game it doesn't say it is on wikipedia. Barry where are you. Barry I'm going to unionize Most notable trait: british