#the one braincell pinging around

[olessan]

I love them

[elitehoe]

Ok look I just need y'all to keep in mind that the last time Kenny Omega wore a graphic tshirt with a double meaning to it the pepsi slut debuted

[glambots]

Y/n is chatting away while working on Monty and Monty is just watching them, trying to use his two and a half brain cells to figure out if this is just regular maintenance or if Y/n is trying to get something going. So still watching them, he slowly reaches for their chest or waist, which makes Y/n stop talking.

Y/n: What are you doing?

Monty: Oh, this isn’t foreplay?

Monty: (slowly reaches for your face)

You: (pauses) ...?

Monty, realizing he Fucked Up: You got...a thing. (pretends to pick something off your hat)

You: Oh, thanks.

Monty: No problem. (internally: Smooth moves, Mont-Man. Nailed it! They don't suspect a thing. I Am So Cool.)

[lellu]

giant evil newt milfs in your area

[antisolanum]

Bro you’re the one on whom a swastika tattoo belongs, you’re call the survivors of the Shoah the reich in order to justify the new murder of seven million Jews, your allies are calling for Jews to be raped and their children murdered, you could not be more evil if you don’t care, but I’m sure you’ll try to find a way to up how evil you are - that’s inevitably what happens on this path. I really wish you guys would start wearing swastikas and stop pretending you’re anti Nazis, you’re literally repeating their propaganda. You want our seven year old nephews dead the same way the Nazis murdered our grandparents seven year old brothers. Shut the ever loving hell up forever about our trauma, if you’re going to root for us to be murdered, I think the bear minimum you can do is be mildly less phenomenally evil. Think you can try that? Try being not so completely the devil incarnate?

you literally cannot parody these people, they are completely gone and only a shell remains

[devourable]

If you’re okay with it, what are your nsfw headcanons for the delinquents? Like as a group (if they do that) and individually?

i'm getting to it!!!! goddamn /lh

ty for the compliments though ahh 😭❤️❤️❤️ i try my best,, hopefully i'll get some more done now that i'm done w the mermaids,

sfw on top ; nsfw beneath!

🚬 the delinquents | mattias, judas, aaron, dominic

· mattias and judas are the ones with the most free time; meaning they're the two who you often hang out with the most. the experience is a bit polarizing because despite them being practically polar opposites, they get along incredibly well; it isn't uncommon for mattias to crack the most stupid jokes ever and for judas to laugh at them. it isn't unusual for them to drag you along to their less-than-legal shenanigans; judas usually keeping you occupied while mattie stuffs his pockets with stuff that he thinks you'd like. they'll laugh it off if you catch them in the act (they already did it, so... may as well enjoy the spoils, right?)

· aaron and dominic do their best to free up time to spend with you, but in the circumstances they can't, they're texting you constantly. they have two different groupchats; one with all five of you, and one specifically for aaron and dom where they'll text you/each other their schedules and what they plan to do when they can spend time with you again. they don't even slightly care if your schedule conflicts with theirs, they will be getting you out of it one way or another.

· they are the definition of 'boys will be boys'. they're all pretty smart on their own (save for mattie), but when they're all together? they share one collective braincell that pings between the four of them. they can and will get distracted by the dumbest things ever, and if one of them gets an idea for something, there's a solid chance the rest of them will follow suit with it. they are not above trying to drag you along with them (especially if you also have next to no braincells to speak of). they will literally get distracted by a cool bug if you send them to do an errand for you.

appearance wise, this is how i imagine them ;

mattias - shortish wavy red hair, pale skin, grey eyes. he has a gap in his two front teeth! his body is lithe and pretty skinny, noodly boy. he has a scar on his stomach. yes, you can kiss it, he will love that.

judas - black hair thats curly on top and shaved on the sides, dark brown skin, light greenish-hazel eyes. he has freckles but they're hard to see if you don't look closely. decently muscular but still a bit on the squishy side <3

aaron - medium length dark brown hair, tired pitch black eyes, tan skin, average build with a bit of muscle on him. he has beauty marks peppering his entire body and one of his teeth are chipped. it's a little bit of an insecurity for him.

dominic - curly black hair, brown eyes, light tan skin — kind of like the inverse of aaron lol? average build but he's closer to the skinnier side. he has a very distinctive birthmark on his face that he always gets a bit flustered over if people make comments about it.

nsfw below the cut, MDNI!

the boys don't really sleep with each other, but they have messed around a few times; especially aaron and dominic, given how long they've known each other (they were each other's first everything!). it's less of them being attracted to each other and more of them being a sort of stress relief for one another if two or more of them are in the mood. best friends help each other out!

mattias is the most likely to initiate something between himself and the other guys, especially if you're involved. he has a bit of an exhibitionism kink, purposefully trying to get it on with you in common areas with the hope that one of his friends will walk in on it and join. he's veeeery touchy, has the tendency to hump/grind against you through his clothes while you're making out because he wants you to feel just how worked up you got him. he likes it almost as much as the actual act of sex, in fact.

judas tends to avoid initiating anything as a whole, but if you come onto him or he's real pent up, he can and will drag you off to any private space he can find for you to share. he's into riskier settings — not in the way mattias is, though, he likes doing it in places you'd get caught in in normal circumstances (such as a park at night, a bathroom in a closed business, an abandoned building, etc etc). has a thing for making you make lots of noises. he loves hearing you say his name.

dominic is a massive voyeur, plain and simple. anything that has to do with watching you, whether that be watching you get railed by one of his friends or a video that one of them took for you, he's all for it. in the event that he walks in on you and one (or more) of his friends having some fun, he's content to watch — unless you ask him to join, of course! he's also very much into receiving. anything involving your hands or mouth on him is enough to drive him nuts.

aaron likes bondage and has a breeding kink, especially when jointed with one another. he loves tying you down and seeing how many times he can get himself to cum in you, muttering about how he's gonna knock you up one way or another (regardless of your gender, lest that makes you dysphoric). he also has a kink for marking of all types, whether that be hickies/bruises or literally marking his/his friend's names on your body. either way, he's taking pictures of you and sharing it to your groupchat later &lt;3

all together, they work pretty well with one another. dominic's content to sit back and watch his friends have their fun with you, mattie and dom are likely the ones actually fucking you, and judas is probably recording the entire thing. the dynamic varies slightly when it's only two or three of them, but for the most part, they have an entire system on how they please you.

[adobe-outdesign]

Lotad review if not done yet

Lotad's pretty fun, on the grounds of both being a lily pad creature and for having six legs for no real reason. The entire line's based off of the kappa, which is a amphibious yokai with a water dish on its head and a beak. Reinventing the water dish as a lily pad is clever, and it works as a secondary theme.

Visually, the triangles on the hat create a zig-zag pattern that's built upon as it evolves, and the yellow beak provides contrast. I do wish there was more contrast between the blue body and the lily pad—maybe a light green to match Lombre—but otherwise it's a fun little guy.

I also appreciate that Lotad very clearly has a single braincell pinging around in its head like a Windows screensaver.

Lombre is probably my favorite out of these guys. I just enjoy this thing's kind of sombre personality and habit of hiding in the water and scaring people—almost feels like it could've been part dark-type if it wasn't for the rest of the line.

There are a few elements that feel a bit extraneous in the design (such as the ear and the spikes on the hands and feet—maybe those are claws, but then why aren't they red?), but otherwise it comes together pretty well. The light and darker green have good contrast and allow the red accents to really pop, and the markings help to break up the body. I also really like the weird beak shape, which is more of a beak on top and a regular jaw on bottom, with a bit of a zig-zag to keep up with that visual element.

The only other thing I question is if the red parts would've made more sense in yellow, seeing as the red, while looking nice, does just randomly pop up in this stage and then abruptly disappear again. But otherwise yeah, this is a good middle stage with a distinct identity.

Ludicolo feels like a bit of an out of nowhere turn, as we suddenly went from a sombre prankster kappa to a strangely Mexican kappa monster with some vague fruit elements integrated into it. However, it is refreshing to get a final stage that's upbeat and super fun instead of the badass-type designs we usually get, and it does still continue the kappa and lily pad themes enough that it still fits with the line.

The design itself brings the zig-zag motif into full swing by giving it both zig-zags on its fur and on its hat, which is now vaguely sombrero-like. The fruit elements in the middle of the hat and the hands are a pretty interesting way to build on its grass-typing, and the colors work well together.

If there's one issue I have with it, it's that the fur feels a bit out of place—it's just a bit strange considering kappa are amphibious creatures and it's still part water-type. Also, while the green around the eyes helps draw attention to them, it does break up the flow of the design due to the triangles going sideways instead of down like all the other zig-zag elements. But that aside, Ludicolo's a pretty entertaining design that really works better than it probably has a right to.

Overall, some fun and funky kappas with some strong visual motifs.

[tintreach-cleite]

WoF Headcannons Arc 1

Clay

He likes woodcarving and decorates his place with his carvings despite his girlfriend being perpetually on fire

He and Peril collectively have three braincells, each having one with the extra bouncing between them like a game of ping pong

He sometimes breathes a little bit of fire on himself to make sure he's still fireproof before he hugs Peril

Peril

She inexplicably hates jenga for literally no reason

She's bi (just got that vibe, yn?)

She likes drawing in burnable objects with her flamescails

Is absolutely terrified that she will accidentally burn a carving that Clay made

Tsunami

She is incredibly muscular but is also the shortest in the group other than Sunny

She likes bridal carrying Riptide and calling him babygirl

She is a master of martial arts and hosts classes for it at Jade Mountain Academy

She has an absolutely terrifying reputation outside her school but actually spoils l her students rotten

Glory

She constantly makes fun of Tsunami for being short

She also makes fun of Deathbringer for being short

She is a total weeb but is terrified that Deathbringer will find out and make fun of her (he already knows)

She REALLY likes food but tries to keep a regal image when her subjects are around

She is the most well liked queen in all of Pyriah

She is impossible to fluster

She's a top

She secretly likes meat

Deathbringer

He always exaggerates his age to try and seem cooler but is actually quite a few months younger than Glory

He is secretly in a d&d group with Kinkajou, Winter, and Qibli but is desperately trying to keep it a secret from Glory (Kinkajou told her all about it)

He loves dishing out flirty comments to Glory but is INSTANTLY flustered as soon as he gets one back

He's secretly a vegetarian

He tries to act like a flirtatious top but is very much the opposite

He is amazing at keeping secrets from literally everyone except Glory

Starflight

He is a romantic ace

He makes a podcast with Fatespeaker

He loves dancing

Despite being blind he has a wonderful memory and is able to memorize a new environment in only a few hours

He has a fear of fire for several obvious reasons and keeps his library OBSCENELY cold

Sunny

She is a lesbian

Clay is her wingman

She is terrified that she will have to inherent the throne and is begging her mother for a sibling

She has severe anxiety

She desperately wants to be a leader but is too scared that no one will listen to her

Thorn

What could I headcannon, she's perfect

Also she and Smolder are totally fucking

She also makes sure Onyx knows just to get on her nerves even more

She's also planning on adopting Qibli

[meltypancake]

hellooo !!

i’m curious how eliane gets along with the rest of the blue lions ? or just any other significant relationships she has with any students at the monastery haha :0

hallo!!! thank you for the ask, it activated so many braincells c:

i'll cover her relationship with the blue lions in the early academy days for now ♪(´▽｀) ranked by friendship level, here we go!!

people she's close to ↓

annette 😊💖💖 precious pal

A+ study buddy and the true reason why eliane hasn't missed the majority of morning classes

she has caught herself removing the pebbles off a road, thinking annette would and could trip on them (´。＿。｀)

there are too many pebbles in this world. she'll just have to settle with catching her friend every time she stumbles

ashe 🥹😊💖 fun to tease

eliane felt an instant kinship with ashe! fellow commoners with a shared interest in herbology make for a great team (^^ゞ

much to his chagrin, she's also way into the spookies. tales of ghosts haunting the monastery really get her going and he would like none of that, thank you very much

she makes him a potpourri pouch filled with ghost-repelling herbs. he ties it to his evil-repelling amulet.

mercedes😊💖💖 provider of snacks and comfort

being around mercedes makes her feel so cared for, she's the older sister she's always dreamed of (´▽｀)

they are both waaay too easy-going for their own good though... empires will rise and fall while they munch on homemade sweets

on friendly terms ↓

ingrid 😋🥔 bonding bites

these two have the most riveting discussions about which tavern offers the juiciest cut of meat. they find time to record a whole tier list of dining hall dishes in a shared journal

ingrid is her best, most faithful taste tester! food truly is the cornerstone of society

dedue 😯🙂 a greenhouse regular she's curious about

she always assumed he was some kind of plant magician. apparently magic isn't his forte, so what the heck is up with that green thumb?

he makes sure to teach her the basics of gardening (before she can ruin the flower bed). the first time her seeds actually end up sprouting, she runs all over the monastery looking to show him

(adding him in the list for completion's sake) dimitri 🙂 nice, but a little uptight

rather distant ↓

felix 🙂 amicable (entirely one-sided)

he's so blunt unlike the whole lot of flowery nobles, there's no second-guessing the meaning of his words which eliane likes. she's pretty fond of him! he finds her rather annoying though (oﾟvﾟ)ノ

eliane will seek out felix for a spar, get obliterated until he's fed up entertaining small fry and he shuffles off as she lays defeated (though not disheartened). rinse and repeat

any verbal abuse goes in through one ear and out the other with her. what a gremlin

sylvain 😐🤨😑 ?????

eliane has incredibly mixed feelings about sylvain which get progressively worse the more she gets to know him

he ping pongs between being genuinely helpful and sensible while also making girls cry on a daily basis... and it would make her life a lot easier if he could just choose one and stick with it !!!

any attempts to flirt with her get shut down. on a different note, she's a little miffed he never trains or studies yet still gets better grades than her

at the end of the academy phase she's become more or less close to everyone in the blue lions, except maybe felix. he's not the type to be all buddy-buddy anyway (‾◡◝)

thank you for reaching the end!!! c:

[little-mouse-adventures]

The reason so much nonsense happens at Fowl Manor isn't because of magic residue or old money insanity, it's because Domovoi "I'm the oldest so I know best" Butler, Tim "My house, my rules" Fowl, Angeline "I'm the lady of the house and real gentlemen always listen to a lady" Fowl, and Artemis "I'm a certified genius so what I say goes" Fowl II share at most two braincells that just bounce around like ping-pong balls, and it's only on obscenely rare occasions that any one of them has possession of both braincells at the same time.

[kennysboxergf]

i LOVE your writing sososo much 🫶🏻 could you pretty pls do an AJ smut where he fucks up and pisses you off so he makes up for it 🤭🤭

Make Up For It ~ AJ Shabeel

Shit. Shit. Shit and fuck.

He fucked up.

And now you wouldn’t talk to him.

And he was really sad about that. Everytime he would go to kiss you, hug you, hold your hand, anything, you would turn away. And you didn’t do that often because him initiating physical contact was already a rat thing so he knew he really fucked up this time.

He walked to your room with a determination that had built from his guilt. Knocking three time (it was your code) he folded his hands in front of his crotch and waited.

10 seconds.

20.

30.

And more, the seconds turned into minutes and AJ started bouncing from foot to foot in anticipation.

1 minute.

2 minutes.

5.

No reply, AJ frowned and called out to you.

No reply, he knocked thrice once more. A ping on his phone.

“Go away” it read.

“Lemme make it up to you” he fired back.

No reply.

“Please?” He texted again.

The door opened in front of him, relief flooded his being as you face appeared in front of him. He almost gave in and went to hug you right there but one of his three braincells reminded him you wouldn’t react well to that.

“Can I come in?” He asked, a small tilt or his head and a anxious expression on his face.

You nod a little and open the door wider. He steps in his shoulders curled into him, making him smaller than he usually appears to be.

You close the door behind him.

“Baby let me-“ he starts talking, turning around as he hears the noise. You interrupt him by cupping his face and kissing him.

He squeaks in surprise but it doesn’t take long for him to wrap his hands around your waist and start kissing back. 

“I thought you were mad?” He asks once you pull away.

“I am,” You say, “but you’re gonna make it up to me aren’t you?”

“Whatever you say, ma’am,” comes the reply as he eagerly pushes you onto the bed. You land with a thud and give him a look of warning because that actually kind of hurt.

He smiles in apology and his hand start exploring up your shirt as his other hand stabilises him above you and he leans down to kiss you.

You reach up to kiss him, arching you back as his hand explores you waist, only slowly moving up to you chest.

You use your free hands to also explore his body. He was toned, even though people wouldn’t expect it. You outlined his abs and chest and just as quickly move you hand into his pants to cup his crotch from the underpants.

He lets out a noise, breaking the kiss to throw his head back. You take the opportunity to flip the two of you around, with you now sitting on his crotch, one hand on his chest and you slowly grind down.

He moans and grabs your hips guiding you to the right places. His hands love up again tugging your T-shirt up. Indulging him, you raise your hands so it can come off fully. He admires your breasts, seeing as you weren’t wearing a bra, and cups one hand around your tit, playing with your nipple.

You let out a quiet moan, but that just wouldn’t do for AJ, who flips the two of you around once more making quick work of your shorts and panties and his clothes as well, they get thrown into some random corner of the room to be found tomorrow.

The next day you are made aware that Sharky, two whole rooms down from you, heard you and AJ and that he had started plans to find another apartment to live in.

-

short and incomplete bcus I am motivated however not very productive

I might complete this later tho if anyone wants 😍

anyways love everyone of you, you’re doing well wherever you are in life, never falling behind, and tot ziens! <3

[crystal-mouse]

Please, PLEASE I'm begging you for some context for the large ham saga WHAT IS THIS

(i am dying of laughter and i need more)

Large Ham is Large Ham. Large ham is beyond comprehension or words.

And with that said, here's the context (warning this will probably be long) in the most concise way i can explain:

To begin with, we have a server. It's mainly a space where we discuss trek and create (often cursed) memes. Most of us are on very wide timezone differences. So whenever we communicate, somebody somewhere is very likely sleep deprived in one way, shape or form. The collective braincell we have developed gets pinged around like a very confused satnav.

With this in mind: The ham saga.

First, @cursedtrekedits sends a photo of an article about omega glory (TOS 2x23). In this image, Sh*tner is decidedly a 'Large Ham'.

thus forward, we call him Large Ham.

Meanwhile on a more wholesome note, @frogayyyy and I create Otter spirk. This is relevant for later.

Then, Large Ham takes my quiz, @gayfour creates the image.

the image is cursed, but there were also other, more cursed, iterations. however, for today, you will be spared their image (these are the less cursed variety).

A few days later, frog drinks an innocent juice, containing on the inside, a quote about buttered otters. This leads to discussing buttered spirk and therefore the idea of buttered sh*tner.

following this, frog searches large ham to create this, but finds that sh*tner appears as the third image when u search large ham. I then posted this discovery.

the image is made into a server emoji.

Smaller Ham takes my quiz, more lore is made. frog creates flat ham.

four creates the he/ham edit.

all is good all is fine, until four forgets the word for squirrel, calling it a snail. Editing the squirrel web page leads to Large Ham web page edit and more hams.

more hams lead to Ham University, created by four. we get masters in cursed memes.

star trek monopoly leads to talking about bad ham and lucky ham. For our pockets. Frog creates 'pocket meat'. Billy bear is unlucky ham.

(lunchable ham is lucky meat FYI)

bill hambearger is created. He is cursed. I post him.

four makes ham pride flags. the pride flags look like five guys spirk so large hamdog is created by four. i think he looks like little robots.

anyway four made a hamclock (its Ham mer time)

then i made this for unknown reasons

Anyway, thats all the current lore and context! something something the curse of knowledge, thanks for the ask!

[rawberry-preserves]

I only had one braincell while making this

Please tag your results

Beware of major spoilers for both games

[hoffmannwrites]

On My List

1  - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 + 1 Masterlist

Author’s Note: OMG this is the last part. I can't believe I actually finished a fic?? who am I??? anywho, this part gets a little hot and heavy, so just a warning there. Nothing super explicit, but like dicks are mentioned. Thank you for reading alone and indulging me!!

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Eddie Munson

Description: 5 Times Steve and Eddie kiss as friends, and one time they don't.

Warnings/Tags: Everyone lives, Nobody dies, 5+1, Kissing, Fluff, Idiots to Lovers, Friends to Lovers, heavy petting, brief sex talk, gay stereotypes, brief mention of Upside Down induced PTSD and panic attacks, uhhh they're gay your honor, no beta we die like Barb, let me know if I missed anything?

I Think We're Alone Now

+ 1

There’s only so many platonic kisses from a super hot jock that a single-braincelled gay man can take. And 5 is the limit. Eddie has been absolutely losing it since he high tailed it out of the last sticky situation he was in with Steve, still trying to wrap his brain around what the fuck was happening. He’s gone back and forth between a bunch of different theories, but usually ends up ping-ponging between “Steve is just a very affectionate friend who is comfortable in his heterosexuality” and “Steve keeps kissing me for a reason”. Eddie refuses to acknowledge the fact that this reason is because Steve actually likes kissing other boys in a very gay, very homosexual way, refuses to even toy with the idea that Steve likes him in that kind of way. But even though he fully believes it is actually impossible, Eddie has been mildly avoiding Steve for the past few weeks. Not totally! But anytime that Eddie isn’t sure if Robin is also working, he waits to return his tapes until he’s sure she is. And anytime Steve calls to invite Eddie over for movie night or to do something with the kids or anything, Eddie makes sure he leaves early enough that he’s not the last one standing. Makes sure he only goes into the kitchen for a snack when someone else is already in there. It’s just safer this way, he thinks. He doesn’t have to deal with the issue if it’s never really an issue, right? Doesn’t have to answer or ask any questions if he and Steve aren’t alone together for them to come up. 

However, Steve isn’t a complete fucking idiot and notices something is up. It takes him a little while, assuming Eddie is just busy with the band or D&D for a couple weeks before he really starts to notice the pattern. But once he does, he’s worried. Worried because he knows what Eddie’s been through in the past year, knows from personal experience how hard it is to live in "the after" of that. He knows that sometimes it can take a long time to really process and show any signs of PTSD, knows it can get even worse around the anniversary of the event (which is right about…now actually). And above all of it, he knows how fucking lonely it is, how hard it is to try to do it by yourself. I mean, hell, Steve didn’t really have anyone to talk to until Robin came around, because it was just too weird with Jonathan and Nancy, and the kids were just kids. And even after he had Robin, he still had to go home sometimes. Usually to an empty house. And even if it wasn’t empty, it’s not like he could tell his parents what was going on, just had to put on a brave face and blame his weird mood on a failed algebra test or a bad day at work. So yeah, he’s no stranger to having to go through all this shit alone and trying to just deal with the impossible- with the way his scars itch and he always feels like there’s something just around the corner and the ringing in his ears sometimes and the migraines and the way his chest starts to tighten when he thinks about any of it too hard. And Steve is determined to make sure Eddie doesn’t have to go through that alone, not like he did. 

So they have a movie night. It’s supposed to be Eddie’s turn to pick, but he’s waiting for the new Evil Dead to get in at Family Video, so they let El pick and she chooses The Goonies (after some helpful suggestions from Robin), which no one is opposed to because it’s fricking The Goonies. And they're at the point where Chunk is telling the Fratellis about everything bad he’s ever done when Steve gets up and goes to the kitchen to make more popcorn. He hates yelling during the movie, but knows it’ll actually be less distracting in the long run. “Eddie can you come here and help me with something?” He knows Eddie is about to complain, ask why someone else can’t do it, he can feel it in his bones like a sixth sense, so he continues. “I need someone tall.” He knows Argyle is actually the tallest out of the group, but he’s been passed out in the recliner since the Truffle Shuffle. He also knows Eddie will never resist an opportunity to remind everyone that he is exactly one inch taller than Steve and yes it matters. 

Eddie hops up from his spot on the floor, too blinded by his own ego to see this is obviously a trap. Steve would never ask him for help to reach something, his pride would prevent him. But Eddie is in the kitchen now, and Steve is pointing to the cabinet above the fridge “there’s more popcorn in there, I just can’t reach it.” 

“Aw, too short down there in under 6-foot land? Don’t worry, I’ll get it for you, seeing that I’m the tallest man in the world,” Eddie says, patting Steve on the head patronizingly. 

“In the world?” Steve just repeats, in disbelief at how Eddie’s ego knows no bounds. 

“Ever, actually,” he casually replies, handing Steve the box of Pop Secret with a smug smile. 

He turns on his heel to return to the living room, but Steve grabs his wrist before he can. 

“Uh, actually I wanted to talk to you for a minute.” Steve says, voice softer and eyes kinder than they were a minute ago. 

Oh no. Oh no oh fuck oh shit. He was about to tell Eddie that he thought this had all gone too far and he knew Eddie had a big fat gay crush on him and that Steve was flattered but just Straight with a capital S. And that was fine! Eddie could live with that, it was honestly probably the best let down he could hope for. But it was so nice living in this delusion where every kiss with Steve didn’t have an overcast cloud of “he rejected you!” over it yet. But Eddie realizes that he’s going to have to have this conversation sooner or later. And he wants to run, oh god does he want to high tail it the fuck outta dodge, but he can’t. No more running, right?

“Ohkayyyy,” Eddie says, feigning oblivion. He decided to stay, not to face it like a man. Baby steps. 

“I just uh.. I just noticed that you’ve been ya know kinda off the past few weeks." (Eddie starts to sweat) "You haven’t been around as much-" (his eyes are looking everywhere except Steve) "-and you pretty much always leave while it’s still light out-" (oh god was it that obvious that he didn’t want to be alone with Steve at night?) "- and you’re just keeping to yourself a little more.” (God he’s so fucking transparent) “I just wanted to let you know that, I get it." (Here is comes) "It’s been a year since everything and it’s never easy on the anniversary and I know it’s fucking scary but you don’t have to do this alone."  (Steve is still holding his wrist) “You know, you have me and Robin and everyone else to talk to or to stay with and we get it. And I know it’s hard to talk about this shit, but you went through literal hell and that’s nothing to be ashamed of. " (Wait he’s confused) "We’re all still processing and dealing with that trauma and PTSD is super complicated, so like we’re here to talk. It helps a lot more than you think, and I just don’t want you to have to deal with all your Upside Down shit alone, okay?" (He’s still confused but putting the pieces together.) 

And Eddie just stairs at Steve for a minute, computing everything Steve just said. Just stares for too long then is appropriate, probably. And Steve looks so concerned, so sincere. And Eddie can’t help but laugh. Fucking fully toothygrincan’tbreathe LAUGH. And now Steve’s a little pissed because, hey man-we all went through shit and people died and we almost died it’s not fucking funny. But before he can chastise Eddie, the taller man is apologizing. “Oh fuck I’m sorry. I’m not—that was really sweet. And I appreciate the fuck outta you. That’s just so not where I thought this conversation was going.” 

Steve’s relieved. “Oh.” 

Eddie’s relieved “Yeah.”

“So where did you think it was going? “

Eddie is no longer relieved. “Oh it’s nothing.” 

“Because something is definitely up with you.”

Fuck. Damn Harrington and his spider sense for always knowing what’s wrong.

Eddie has a couple options. He can keep walking on eggshells, ignoring his friends, and flaking early and pretend like nothing is happening forever. (Or until his crush on Steve goes away. Which it won’t. So forever). He can stop doing that, but still avoid this conversation, and just act like nothing ever happened. (Which notably will be impossible, with the way he can’t ever take his eyes off Steve when they’re together.) Or he can face this. Right here, right now. He can tell Steve what’s going on and they can both get the fuck over it. And hell, the man saved the entire world with a guitar solo, he can face a straight boy not liking him back. 

“I like you” 

“Yeah I’d hope so. You’re in my home and we’ve been hanging out for like a year.” 

“No like… I have, uh, romantic feelings for you. And I know you don’t feel the same and you’re straight and that’s fine, I just couldn’t keep dealing with being around you all the time and you flirting back and kissing me because even though I know it never meant anything to you, it meant something to me and was really confusing so I just had to put some distance there. And I know that you’re probably gonna be pretty upset with me for, like, being gay and letting you joke with me or whatever and that’s fine, I just, uh. Yeah. That’s why I’m being weird. The Upside Down stuff is like, completely secondary to everything else going on in my head right now.” 

Steve just lets Eddie ramble. Lets him get it all out while he listens with his arms folded across his chest and eyebrows raised. Once Eddie finally finishes, finally meets Steve’s eyes, Steve can’t help but quirk his brows into the bitchiest expression he can muster. 

“First of all, you gotta sort out your priorities. The anniversary of our group shadow dimension almost-death should definitely come before worrying about boys. Second of all, who told you that?” 

Eddie’s a little taken aback at Steve’s nonchalance. And confused again. “Told me what?” 

“Like. Half of that shit. That I’d be mad at you for flirting with me? That it was a joke? That I’m straight?”

Now that last one really catches Eddie off-guard. “Well. No one. But like. You are. Right? Straight I mean.” 

Steve’s face is just getting more contorted as this conversation goes on. “Eddie!” He pinched the bridge of his nose in exasperation. “Who’s my favorite singer?” 

“What?” 

“Answer the question” 

“Springsteen. Or Madonna.” 

"And what’s my favorite movie?"

“You tell everyone its Animal House but its Rocky Horror.” 

It’s like Eddie doesn’t even hear the words that are coming out of his own mouth. And Steve is looking at him wide eyed with an eerily similar expression to the one Robin gave him in that Star Court bathroom stall in the summer of ‘85. “Eddie…” he takes a step closer and Eddie move his eyes to meet Steve’s, brow still furrowed, ass now pressed against the countertop. Steve boxes him in, puts both hands on the counter on either side of Eddie. He wants to kiss Eddie, wants to kiss him and shut him up and drown in those stupid big eyes so fucking bad, but apparently that hasn’t worked yet! Apparently kissing 5 times is just too vague for the metal head. So Steve does what he does best, he flirts relentlessly. His mouth is inches away from Eddie’s and Eddie looks almost drunk off it, trying to follow around Steve’s eyes and lips at the same time. “Remember what you called me in the RV when you were hotwiring it last spring break?” Steve is whispering into Eddie’s blushed skin. 

Eddie swallows heavily trying to focus on the meaning behind the words and not just the fact that he can feel them on his skin. “Uh…big boy?” He says, voice almost squeaking, completely void of all previous bravado or sex appeal. 

“Mhm,” Steve nods slightly. “I always knew I was into guys. But you calling me that, while hot wiring a fucking trailer. It wasn’t just Johnny Depp in Nightmare on Elm Street in a crop top or Tim Curry in those fishnets anymore. It wasn’t a hypothetical anymore. It was right in front of me. It was you. A little dirty and in leather and me in your fucking vest and you grinning up at me like you didn’t know exactly what you were doing to me.” The whole time he’s making this confession, he’s whispering it straight into Eddie’s skin. He’s getting impossibly closer and ghosting over ever where Eddie needs him. But they’re crotch to crotch at this point and Eddie can feel Steve getting half hard against him at the thought of the memory and Eddie is quick to follow in his footsteps. Eddie is silent, eyes half closed and just relishing at Steve being all over him. “Eds..” Steve practically licks up Eddie’s neck, getting only a hum that sounds like a question back. He removes his right hand from its place on the counter and brings it to Eddie’s chin, gripping it just enough to shock him into opening his eyes and really looking at Steve. “Kiss me.” 

Eddie doesn’t need to be told twice. His hands are in Steve’s hair, his shoulders his waist, his ass, just moving trying to feel all of him. Steve is pressing him into the counter so hard now Eddie thinks there might be a bruise across the backs of his thighs, but he doesn’t fucking care because the way the front of their bodies press together is worth everything. Steve’s hands are in Eddie’s hair now, tugging just right and Eddie’s mouth opens enough to let Steve bite his bottom lip and tug. And Eddie almost moans out loud, but catches himself just in time. “Steve.” Now it’s his turn to return a noncommittal hum. “Steve-“ Eddie says more pointedly this time, pulijng him back just slightly by his pockets. Before Steve can protest, before he can let out the whine he's on the verge of, Eddie reminds him of their current situation. “There are kids in the other room. And if you keep going, I’m going to cream my jeans in your kitchen.” Steve loves the idea of Eddie cumming in his pants for him, if he’s being honest, but understands the issue. “Stay the night?” He asks with a few more kisses to Eddie’s neck. “You’ll be lucky if you ever get rid of me again” and Eddie has to practically drag Steve back to the living room, where they’re now sitting almost on top of each other on the floor against the couch. It takes about 10 minutes before the kids realize they never brought back popcorn and Nancy decides to go do it her damn self. 

A/N:

The Goonies came out in June of 1985. It’s a banger. I think that El would really like it because it’s got adventure and friendship and bad guys who get what’s coming to them and has a happy ending. It remind her of her friends and she has a crush on Mikey (also rip Bob) 

Popcorn was like huge in the 80s? Act 11 and Pop Secret both came out in the early 80s as microwave popcorn and so did a bunch of other brands. I didn’t know it came out so late??? Wtf??? I forget microwaves didn’t exist.

I named each of these chapters after a song from the 80s and they've all been period accurate accept for this one, which came out in August of '87 ( this would take place around March/April of '87), but it's fucking TIFFANY so I made an exception. Anywhore, here's a list of the songs in case you wanna check them out.

You Spin Me Round by Dead or Alive

Every Breath You Take by The Police

Happy New Year by Abba

Suddenly, Seymour from Little Shop of Horrors

Drive by The Cars

I Think We're Alone Now by Tiffany

Thank you for reading my little fic, gay people in my phone! Feel free to follow my fandom Twitter @ hauntedvaginas , check me out on Ao3 @ hoffmannwrites or shoot me DM here if you ever wanna be my friend. I love you and I'm kissing you on the forehead.

[ironunderstands]

tips for playing mercy (as someone who has played her way too much

some terminology:

first off I’m assuming that whoever is reading this plays on computer and has default controls, sorry consol players but that’s not my area of expertise (although I’m sure the general tips will still be useful)

I will be referring to guardian angle as GA (the ability that allows you to fly around; its shift on the keyboard), GA + spacebar as SS or slingshot, since it slingshots you in whatever direction you look in when you press space, and GA + crtl (or whatever your crouch button is) as SJ or super jump, because whenever you press ctrl after using GA you do, well a super jump. Valkyrie (Q ability the one that allows you to fly around like you are in creative mode in Minecraft) will just be referred to as Valk, and Ressurction (e ability that brings people back to life) will just be called Res, I will call mercies staff her staff and her gun her gun (or Barbie blaster if I am going to attempt to be funny)

onto the actual tips LMAO

-never stop moving, even if you think you are safe, you are not safe, you are never safe and unfortunately your enemies do have braincells and will notice where you stay, and will come after you

-that being said; you don’t have to use GA as soon as it comes off of cooldown, if you are in a safe position, stay there until it’s clear it will become unsafe, although move back and forth obviously (unless it’s one of those spots where you really can’t move, although I would recommend not staying there for long)

-high grounds are your best friend, mercy is one of the most mobile agents in the game, half of your enemies are going to seriously struggle to reach you

-with the height and position advantage, you can typically see more than your teammates do, I recommend calling out or at least pinging where enemies are if you think it’s important

-“use GA not as positioning but to position” -absolutely Queen of mercies Skeisti, as fun as spamming SJ is, it leaves you in the enemies line of sight and makes you easy to kill if they can aim, literally the only time I would recommend spamming SJs is if you are using them to glide on a roof out of the enemies sight, but even then treat the position as temporary

-DAMAGE BOOST, healing nothing is useless, if you can use blue beam, do use blue beam, and don’t wait for your beam target to be 100% on hp, if you are waiting to heal your team to full to damage boost, you will never damage boost, besides your other support is there for a reason

-HOWEVER, you can’t damage boost a corpse so if your beam target reaches critical health (they will have like a red plus sign on them and be yellow through walls) HEAL THEM especially if your other support is dead/unable to reach them and there are no health packs in the area, or methods of self healing are on cooldown/unreliable in the situation

-speaking of your other support, pay attention to their health bar, them being dead is bad for everyone so as soon as they hit critical you need to switch your attention to them, they can heal your other teammates in the meantime

-if your other support is getting dove, beam them; doesn’t matter if it’s one person, doesn’t matter if that person is almost dead, if your support dies from this their is a 90% chance the fight is lost

-stop trying to save teammates that are beyond saving, your Doomfist diving headfirst into a 1 v 5 with 100 hp and a dream a million miles away from you is a goner, unless you have Valk you have to accept that

-speaking of accepting things, accept when a fight is lost and run away, the only ones who tell you there is shame in running away are your enemies who want you dead

-memorize healthpack locations and GA/SS to them if you are in danger, trust me this has saved me so many times

-learn how to play other supports, even top 500 mercy OTPs can play other ones, if you are inflexible the enemies will break you

-you can move when you are Resing, don’t stand still

-try and res behind cover; learning how to Jump Res really helps with this and can let you pull off some reses you really couldn’t before

-if you are doubting you can do a Res than probably don’t do it, it’s better to stay alive then get yourself and your Res target killed again, it’s a 30 second cooldown after all

-you do have a substantial amount of time to res a dead person depending on their respawn timer, so if your enemies are distracted and you know your team is ok without you for a few seconds, going to res a soul in your enemies back line and flying back isn’t a bad idea

-don’t waste Valk, even in the highest ranks, killing a mercy who knows what they are doing in Valk is incredibly difficult, it’s your get out of jail free card and use it when you know you have to or at least when you know it will be beneficial

-in Valk you can see the enemies health bars so don’t be afraid to pistol someone if you know you can kill them

-however, try not to go for kills in Valk in comp, battle mercy is fun however it’s not very good, infinite ammo can’t save her low projectile speed and damage (it’s only 40 per headshot), and it’s incredibly hard to kill people from war away, and getting up in their face to aim easier puts you at risk, so don’t treat Valk like an Ilari ultimate, a support who’s ultimate is designed to do damage because Valk isn’t designed to do damage

-don’t be afraid to damage boost your tanks: a tank using their ultimate, roadhog and rein in close combat and/or roadhog using hook, Ramattra using his punches and a high power Zarya are just as good damage boost targets as your dps

-speaking of dps, some damage dealers are better to boost than others, typically I would pick the ones that don’t have to go in and dive, as diving puts you in danger

There’s way more I could say, however there’s better and smarter mercy mains on YouTube so I recommend watching their stuff (like the aforementioned Skeisti and Elyzhau). Have fun mercying, and I hope this was moderately helpful

[nonuggetshere]

Wayward royals au is so so fun because on one hand there’s incredible angst but on the other hand it’s just the comedy of errors of just being on the worlds worst road-trip.

All three of them just barely know how to be a person in society and it shows every time they get somewhere. In the meantime it’s just awkward silence on the road intermittent with moments that do eventually become points of bonding it seems.

YEAH, EXACTLY

All three of these idiots share one singular braincell and it gets passed around like a ping-pong ball, and sometimes it just misses and rolls away instead

PV is somehow most functional, if not for the debilitating social anxiety that is. God bless that stag for putting up with their bullshit for a year and a half, I would have just cut my loses and left them to die.

PK also absolutely fumbles around with the map once they do manage to get one and PV absolutely gives him shit for that

Also once they do bond there's no escaping short jokes from PV. Like calling him "your shortness"