chaichaichuu

[autism-swagger]

Tara headcanons :3

(it's literally just angst. Blame @lionydoorin for making me have Tara thoughts)

She can't stand the smell of cooking meat anymore. It reminds her of Amber.

After Sam left, there wasn't anyone buying groceries on a regular basis. She never starved, but there were many occasions where she went to bed hungry.

She doesn’t remember most of the night her dad left (or even the man himself for that matter). She tried to grab him as he was leaving, but he shoved her off. She slammed her head on the corner of the wall really hard, and ended up with a scar on her forehead, chronic psychosomatic migraines, and tinnitus.

She'll avoid going to the hospital unless she absolutely has to. Not only does it reminds her of being attacked, she was also a really sick kid, and she spent a lot of her childhood hospitalized. Even just going to the doctor stresses her out.

She's like. 70% stress and anxiety at any given moment. Seriously somebody get this girl some SSRIs before she has a heart attack.

Her leg and hand have permanent nerve damage, and her entire left arm is kind of fucked up after 6. She has a semi-permanent arm brace, a cane for her leg, and a whole lot of chronic pain.

Christina had a revolving door of boyfriends, and would bring them home sometimes. They were almost always awful to Tara.

She really misses Amber sometimes. She never tells anyone.

[james-spooky]

this is a test

[snailfen]

whoever designed utopia shelter is my personal life nemesis now

[gatheryepens]

…

[weridokid776]

Jealousy Jealousy’

Hashira boys x reader

Context:a new demon slayer has been really touchy and talkative to you and your boyfriend is not having it

this has:Obanai Iguro,Sanemi Shinazugawa,Tengen Uzui,Muichiro Tokito,Giyu Tomioka,Kyojuro Rengoku

also this might have spelling errors sorry

btw Muichiro is age up in this (around 17-18)

Obanai Iguro

Jealousy level:50% he would think he the only one that’s worthy for your time no one else so when he heard a lower rank demon slayer was talking and touching you he was in rage he would hold your hand as he glared at the demon slayer “obanai…your holding my hand…hard..” you said he looked at you with soft eyes “sorry…” he said looking away from you he would secretly talk to the demon slayer “you have no time with lady/Mr y/n..they and I are on the same rank you are nothing but beneath us..you are not worth their time..” and soon the demon slayer would leave you alone cause of obanai threats “that’s weird right..?” You said to obanai “very..” he said as if he didn’t do anything wrong.

Sanemi Shinazugawa

Jealousy level:90%

he would hate and I mean HATE that someone other than him is touching your arm and talking to you “who the fuck are you..” he said behind you glaring at the demon slayer, you looked at him and smiled “oh! Sanemi! This is the new demon slayer!” You rise an eyebrow like obanai he would threatened the demon slayer “who the fuck do you think you are?… your nothing..y/n is mine..and will always and only be mine do you understand..?” The demon slayer nods “good..” and soon the demon slayer quickly stopped talking to you “hey sanemi have you seen the new demon slayer they said they wanted to talk to me..” you ask him he gave you a look “no..I heard he’s on a…‘special’ mission by the master..” you looked at him “oh well I hope he gets back okay.���. Sanemi stood up “come on let’s go..” he said you smiled and walked together holding pinkies.

Tengen Uzui

jealousy level:30%

You being the fourth wife/first husband of Tengen uzui liked to sometimes walk around the demon slayer Corb when you saw a new demon slayer you both started a conversation you didn’t think anything of it but the demon slayer was touching your arm Tengen from a far saw this he walked up and a small smile on him as he place his hand on your head you looked up to see Tengen “oh lord Tengen hello back from your mission..?” He noded and smiled “yes how is my lovely WIFE/HUSBAND..” he said a bit hard and low the demon slayer looked a bit shocked “wife/husband..?” The demon slayer said Tengen smiled “yeah they my fourth wife/husband…” the demon slayer was again shocked Tengen put his hand on your waist Tengen:come one y/n we should get going suma and the others are waiting for us ..” he said as you two walked away leaving the demon slayer alone Tengen smirked.

Muichiro Tokito

Jealousy level:50%

he would hate a random demon slayer touching you and talking to you you were talking to the new demon slayer they were touching you muichiro threw a pebble at them “ow..” the demon slayer said holding there head “oh sorry…I miss..” he said claiming glaring at the demon slayer as he held a pebble “hello y/n lady mitsuri was wanting us to go have lunch with her..do you want to come..?” You smiled softy and noded taking muichiro hand as you two walked he would most certainly threaten the demon slayer “you better leave miss/mr y/n alone they don’t like you and never will…” and soon the demon slayer left you alone.

Giyu Tomioka

Jealous level:70%

normally Giyu isn’t really jealous but when you were mostly talking to the new demon slayer he got pretty upset has much they were touching you and how you were laughing with him he walked up to you two grabbed your waist and held you close you looked up at him “giyu..?” You said looking up at him “sorry I but I need to talk to your… friend..” you looks at him seeing he was talking about the new demon slayer you noded as giyu and the demon slayer walked behind a wall Giyu soon pin him to the wall “listen here you are nothing to y/n they are perfect you are nothing but a dirty fly…so leave them be..”

and just like that the fellow demon slayer left you alone..and you always wondered why.

Kyojuro Rengoku

Jealousy level:80%

He would try to acted calm when they will be touching you be soon he would also threaten them “I suggest you leave my partner and me alone we don’t want you by us..” he said holding you closer to him he would try to stay calm when the demon slayer would try and touch your shoulder rengoku who catch there hand “I think you should go…I-….we don’t want you here..” soon the demon slayer left, rengoku sighed “I’m sorry little flame..I don’t know what happen to me.. I do apologize..” he looked at you “it’s okay rengoku to be honest that person was kinda creepy…” he laughed softy “you are my favorite person you know that..” he kiss your forehead “set your heart ablaze little flame..”

Thank you for reading <3 :)

[noellefan101]

Offline to Online

Summary: your boyfriend is a streamer, a popular one at that. this is a fic about: how their chat find out that you are dating, how they treat you off-stream and on-stream/do they treat you differently

Warnings: swearing, mentioning of death threats and killing(Scaramouche), streamer reader(Scaramouche), slight ooc, if there is anything else then pls tell me

Characters: Xiao, Childe, Venti, Scaramouche, Aether

Note: I am trying my best ok, and I'm kinda new to Tumblr, so if it isn't to your liking then leave, please./I´m sorry if you can´t understand what I´m writing, bc neither can I/. btw this is later than I originally intended bc it got deleted when I was almost DONE, like seriously. so I have like no motivation left now, yay :(

Xiao

How Chat Found Out: You two were roommates, or that´s what his chat thought anyways. Because you two lived together that was what you told them and most believed that so you thought it was fine/Xiao is shy and lied about you two dating when they asked, and then you just lied too cus you are the best(I mean that with my whole heart).

but one day when you were out with some of your friends, and Xiao was streaming at home with Zhongli(in this story Xiao´s adoptive father) some girl suddenly came up to you and started yelling at you because apparently you took her "boyfriend" away, you and your friends got confused and just let her be after, she had yelled at you for about 2 min. a little later you called Xiao and explained what happened. and after Xiao told you that Zhongli got asked about your relationship while he was gone to get some food, and he forgot that you were keeping it a secret and even showed some photos of you kissing. when you got home/to a guilty Zhongli and Xiao trying his best to comfort him/you both forgave him and then properly announced it the next day, so you don´t have to worry about anyone finding you out. . . because they already know.

On-Stream: he is very shy so its mostly something like your beside him, in the background or sometimes sitting in his lap. he doesn´t pay that much attention to you but only because he thinks it's embarrassing and that stuff. he will also become a tomato if you kiss him on-stream, even though he will despise you for an hour or so its worth it.

Off-Stream: he becomes less shy and pays more attention to you, he also blushes more at your closeness because he doesn´t feel like he has to hold back his emotions. why? well, he´s with you the most wonderful y/n in the whole world. so yeah he behaves differently when you two are alone, and not with hundreds of people watching you.

he loves you, but he´s not always good at showing it.

Childe

How Chat Found Out: honestly I think would just tell them I they asked, but weirdly no one did. maybe it was because they didn´t want to interfere, and thought it was inappropriate. or they didn´t want any of the lovesick fans ruining your relationship. but either way, there was definitely someone else in the house, because they could sometimes hear someone talking in another room, and sometimes post and pans, I guess they just didn´t say anything about it.

but then one of his friends brought up how you were doing because you were sick the last time they talked to him. and he said you were doing better and then the chat flipped out with messages like "Who the f**k is y/n", "are you dating that y/n person", bratty fan girls raging because how dare him and so on. he then talked about you for the next 30 min, and the other person in the call almost fell asleep by how much he talked, so the chat now knows a lot about you. . . maybe a little too much.

On-Stream: he talks a lot, he always does, but now there are more topics about you when he talks all day. example: what you ate today, a pretty outfit you wore this week, some new accessories he got you today, and yadda yadda. he also has you sit on his lap or beside him in your own chair. and ofc he kisses you at least once every stream.

Off-Stream: I would say that he´s not much different, but maybe a little, for example: lets you talk more and now listens more than he talks, kisses you more and is always touching you(not in a sexual way).

he loves you more than anything and is not afraid to show it.

Venti

How Chat Found Out: honestly I think they already knew since he does "drunk" streams-streams with alcohol-and there was always someone beside him: you. you decided you would be bedside him for his safety and to make sure he doesn´t do anything too dumb. you were out of frame, so they couldn´t really see you, but Venti sometimes talked to you so they knew what you sounded like, and saw your hands once or twice. and they adored you, and by the way he talked about you and looked at you he did too. So naturally they thought that you were dating/or related by blood but he was too lovestruck when he looked at you.

but yeah one stream he maybe drank a little too much, and he maybe began talking to you while forgetting that he was live and called you some rather. . . sweet names and then passed out, so you carried him out of his room to make him sleep a bit. when you suddenly remembered that you forgot to turn off the stream and you didn´t even turn off the camera. meanwhile, the chat was freaking out because you were so freaking pretty. so you went in and turned the stream off.

On-Stream: you now sat a little closer and people could see at least half your body, you also there in more streams and not just those containing alcohol. you two didn't give that much affection but you sometimes kissed him here and there.

Off-Stream: besides being closer and kissing more often then I don´t think there are any other differences in behavior other than ofc you spend more time together and not just beside each other.

he loves you a lot and also loves to show it.

Scaramouche

How Chat Found Out: well basically he got into an argument with Childe typical of him. you were in a collab with them and playing a multi-player game when they started arguing over something/you didn´t know what bc you tried to ignore them, so you didn´t get a headache/and it got so heated you had to mute them so you and your viewers didn´t hear all their screaming and send a message to Scara to tell you when they were done. Therefore you didn´t hear Scara yell "Well at least I'm not single" (I forgot to say that here Childe is single in this part, oh well) and everybody was shocked, they thought that Childe would be the one to get a partner first. so while Scara and Childe were still arguing, the viewers started discussing who would want to date were dating him, they didn´t find anybody though.

a few days later they finally asked him instead of speculating about it, and he/with a straight face/"Oh. . . me and y/n are dating, you didn´t know?" and let's just say that chat flipped out even more because wtf you dating HIM of all people

On-Stream: he doesn´t show any affection like at all, the only thing is you forcing him to let you sit in his lap. but no kissing, sweet talk or anything like that, nope just the same grumpy Scaramouche. he got a little annoyed when you kissed him once while he played with some friends but forgave you. Oh, and you also collab more with each other.

Off-Stream: he is definitely a lot nicer, and is kinda soft for you/but only for you/. And he doesn’t look like he wants to k!ll someone all the time or sending death threats to anybody, so at least that's one thing going for ya.

he loves you, no matter if you annoy him from time to time.

Aether

How Chat Found Out: he was in a collab with a few people (Lumine, Venti, Xiao...), and Lumine wanted to annoy Aether, it´s a sibling thing. and therefore she brought up a lot of... not the best topics to talk about on stream, and she also brought up the fact that someone is living with him/you/and how that person is just sooo sweet and pretty/handsome. (because of course she´s been over and already knows that you two are dating) so she teased him by telling him about how he should totally date you, to try and get him to reveal it to the viewers. yes she could have just told them, but this was more fun for her.

he knew what she was doing but didn´t give in until Venti (actual best annoying b!tch) started to do it too, which Lumine loved Aether... not so much. so he eventually gave in and told them that, yes he was dating someone, Xiao then asked who and Lumine made him admit that it was you/the person he`s currently living with/and chat wanted ANSWERS so they asked him stuff like, who were you, where did you meet, when did you meet, how do you look, can we see this y/n, and so on. he answered the best he could while venti and Xiao were also asking questions. he eventually called you in and asked if it was ok for people to see you, and you said yes. (you cannot say no, understand) so you showed your face and you trended on teyvats twitter.

On-Stream: he definitely has you around him almost all the time, like sitting on his lap, beside him, or having you do something of your own in the background, you're properly also there if he does any cooking streams, vlogs or hangouts.

Off-Stream: he´s still has you around him, but now you´re a lot closer. that´s his way to show more love freely instead of keeping it down. because there's tons of people looking at you all the time, and sometimes he doesn´t want to share you.

he loves you very much, and wants you to be there with him at all time.

Masterlist

You are welcome to reblog and like any of my posts, but you CAN NOT translate, copy or hate on anybody for liking my posts

[pwippy]

hi. what is this. 4th hand post? idk. anyways. reaching out in alien stage! literally and metaphorically! i had to cut out a lot of stuff because i reached the 30 image limit

mizi

she doesn't put on an act when she performs. the way she reaches out to sua is the same way she performs, but without! a glass wall separating them! she's first to reach out to sua and holds on tightly. she also reaches out in self defense (aka beating up luka or that cool gun scene I COULDNT FIT IN.) or in love/anger. for the anger part check out this cool thread @crustyfloor and @ivanttakethis analysing how mizi couldve been attacking sua as well

sua

once she connected with mizi she held on TIGHT. before mizi, she was treated as doll. just an object. with mizi (codependency) she actively reaches out, placing flowers in mizi's hair and reaching for the light. the light, being artificial, could represent false aspirations? she hopes for a better future but knows its doomed. alternately shes reaching for heaven. (SORRY I HAVE TO QUOTE IT- rage rage against the dying of light OK IM DONE) also mizisua picked up the 2 hands outstretched from each other. its like theyre halves of a hug its so cute

ivan

man. where do i even start with him. besides the beating up scene which was more reciprocation? ig? hes actually kinda lowkey and gentle with how he reaches out. i cut out the club scene which would be the most obvious example but yeah !! he reaches back for till in the meteor scene. he does a hand twirl (which someone analysed on pinterest), he reaches out again when he's dying, closest thing we'll get to him opening up, in any collar scenes he like barely brushes tills neck. how does he know how to open those btw. in his 2 other freaky scenes he's. distracting till?? idk i've seen arguments for him distracting till by doing that blood thing but till did like. pay attention to him. he responded to wtv ivan said. idk it might be an unreliable narrator moment. ALSO THE WALL. THE SCRATCHES IN THE WALL. not sure if he's scared or interested or something else but hes holding back something man. idt he'd interfere tbh

till

he reaches out for mizi most of the time. its always indirect tho! chasing the flower crown. literally held back by glass. reaching out for fake mizi. AND most importantly reaching out with his music. i think the guitar fingering counts. he always can't or doesn't want to approach mizi. he straight up doesn't reach out to ivan besides the meteor scene. might be symbolically implicative of his fear of emotional connection!

hyuna

she reaches out to people to help them!! when she was younger she reached out to luka (theres also that one part in all in where shes brushing her fingers against his face) and acted as some support for him. despite her brother being audibly creeped out by luka she brushed this off and treated both of them like younger siblings (despite luka being older). she also picked up(???) the fist in the air thing from hyun woo! outside of anakt she looks like she wants to strangle or shoot luka. when she tried to stab him and was sent off stage she saw a hallucination of hyun woo but couldn't reach out since she was in handcuffs. she helps mizi out now too!! assists her in navigating around the alien stage premises (helps her up onto the scooter + gives her a gun) and distracts her from a mental breakdown

luka

off stage he's usually curled up (the official art rahh) but on stage he takes as much control as he can. illusion of freedom! he goes straight for the neck or for his opponents emotions and purposely gets into their personal space. the way he reaches out is like a taunt or a lure. towards the alien audience, his chest is bared to them. "i was made for your entertainment." etc.

also i think its interesting to note anyone who reaches for the sky is immediately cooked

[comfortcomes]

i said i would make an actual post about this and my irls are sick of me talking about it on ig i’m sure but i do think it’s really really important that people know how much abortion funds are struggling rn on both the local and national levels. after the dobbs decision in 2022 there was a huge surge in donations to ab funds and a lot of them were able to expand their budgets as a result which was amazing. but that money is gone now, it is not being replenished on anywhere near the same level, and abortion access is MUCH more expensive than it was two years ago. these funds don’t just pay for abortion procedures (the cost of which has also gone up btw), they also provide direct support for flights, gas, hotels, because for people living in half the states in the US these are now crucial factors in their ability to access reproductive healthcare. the two biggest national funds (NAF and planned parenthood) have both capped their assistance for individual callers because of the demand, which in turn puts even more strain on local funds to close that gap. so basically if you’re trying to get an abortion as a US citizen today there’s no guarantee you’ll legally be able to in your state, the procedure will be more expensive and it’ll be harder to get an appointment than it was two years ago, and despite you paying what could easily be thousands of dollars to access essential healthcare, where you could have been fully funded by NAF in 2022, these orgs are now only able to pledge 30% of your total cost. funds in my state that have monthly budgets in the tens of thousands are having to close their helplines after two hours every week because of the insane amount of need. granted i live in a state that experiences unique demand as the first access point for many people living in southern states with abortion bans, but we’re not at all unique in the inability to keep up with the amount of people seeking help.

if you gave money to your local abortion fund when dobbs dropped, i guarantee no matter where it is that fund is now overwhelmed with far more demand and much less money than they had in 2022. and abortion funds are some of the only organizations you can donate to and be absolutely certain your money is going directly to people who need it—we’re a very small org but at the last budget meeting for my local fund we literally had less than $30 allocated for anything other than abortion support the entire fiscal year. two years ago people were giving “rage donations” in anger about the future injustices that would happen when abortion bans became widespread, but those things actually ARE happening NOW and there’s a really simple way you can make a small dent in a massive national crisis and it’s by becoming a recurring donor or volunteering for the abortion fund near you. as a country we’ve decided to just accept that women don’t have the right to full bodily autonomy in half of the US but you don’t actually have to accept it, you can stop numbing yourself to the grief you experienced about the end of roe v wade and contribute materially to slowly building that right back up again. and these are the places that are doing that: https://abortionfunds.org/find-a-fund/ and they really need your money

[crumblinggothicarchitecture]

I was so impressed with your toe-to-toe comment on the French philosophy anon. So happy to have found you, omg! I heard Taylor called her ttpd set as the "female rage musical." I take it she knows the impact of the song Labour by Paris Paloma which has been dubbed as the female rage anthem. So naturally, here is the 34 year old culture vulture, can't-have-any-ideas-of-her-own that is Taylor Swift hopping there wanting to get the attention away from it when that song is quite phenomenal. One song compared to her 31 diss tracks that's nothing to me, at least, but the excessive sentimentality of an infantile woman in her 30s. It's gross the confessions she's put on that album. And even her own fans are comparing her to Olivia Rodrigo. That's she's copying everything about her - song, outfits, the "female rage" theme just to mock her. Somehow, Swift thinks it would do her a world of good. People are catching on to her antics which are absolutely disgusting, btw. I'm hoping one day you write about all these completely ridiculous gross things she's done using her own lyrics. You know what I mean? I hope someone write about her nasty lyrics and that it completely destroys her.

Thank you ha, I'm glad you found something meaningful in that post. I will not lie, that Anon actually hurt my feelings for a second (I got over it by writing my response), but I was upset at being so misunderstood. I'm not out here levying unreasonable criticism at Taylor Swift. All will be based on reality, or interpretation of her own lyrics.  I’m defs out to get her though- in the most legitimate way possible- and maybe someday I will publish for real on her. I have a couple of criticisms that I will not be putting on my blog- because I want to say it on a bigger platform. : )  

I do see a lot of harmful things in her music that I have been resisting the urge to write about for YEARS! Even back in 2009, listening to "Love Story" I remember thinking to myself, oh this is nothing like what Shakespeare meant and it's also a weird appeal to the patriarchy through the "I talked to your Dad/ Go Pick out a white dress." It's so clear that she's just reduplicating mainstream attitudes on romantic relationships by using Christian Conservative social standards of needing the father's permission to ask the girl's hand in marriage. She obviously wanted to attract the Christian- Conservative fan- base with that song, and that's exactly what happened. Her marketing is tied to the phrases she places inside her songs in a way that is extremely calculating. She, Afterall, learned from the best at attracting mainstream, Christian, conservative fans, Toby Keith (hate that fascist, white nationalist freak). (WHoops, that was mean- oh well, he’s dead anyway). (and if he wanted me to be nice- he shouldn't have been a fascist).  

It's so obvious, and I really figured everyone else was also aware of the ways in which Swift interpolates patriarchal standards in her music. I have many more examples- I could write a whole essay on it.  

Apparently, everyone thought she was a feminist? Bro, she became a "feminist" if only to evade criticism and capitalize on mainstream pop-feminist trends. She's not a real feminist. Her use of “feminism” to evade critique ties directly into her other marketing strategy of telling the world “I’m so innocent and young” all the time. 

Also, her co-opting of the phrase Female Rage has made me angry, exceptionally angry. I saw that she's trying to trademark the phrase. I am incensed. I will post about it soon. 

I wish Swift would stop co-opting legitimate terms and pulling only the most shallow- self-centered conception of the term out to use in her mediocre music. She’s like if Pinterest was a person- and I’m tired of it.  

Paris Paloma’s “Labour” is amazing, because guess what- it actually speaks about the experience of women under patriarchal standards in a way that respects the seriousness of the topic. I absolutely believe that Swift saw how viral that song went and decided she needed to cash in on that too.  

And she is totally copying Olivia Rodrigo. Can you imagine being 34 and trying to act 20? I would die of embarrassment. But it's so obvious that it's getting weird.

I have much more to say on this topic- sincerely I could write a book on the conceptual point of “Female Rage” in media. I have thousands of examples, and I’ve been studying this stuff for years. I will, however, ramble on no longer. Thank you for your kind words- and I hope you enjoy my upcoming writings.

[lady-phasma]

Hey! I'm loving chatting with you on these last posts, so now I'm curious about your IWTVerse faves? Season, episode, scene, character, ship, book, chapter, quote. It can be more than one, btw! I know quotes are more specific and it can be hard remembering, so it doesn't need to be your ultimate favorite, but something you love. Also, how should I call you? 🙃💗

I am so excited to answer this! It's been lovely to meet you! You can call me Auntie but not everyone feels comfortable with that. So Phasma works or Phazzie (I've gotten that one before and it's fun).

My IWTVerse faves... hmm... let's see.

Season 2 is definitely my favorite season for many, many reasons but mostly because Assad got to shine so much more!

Favorite episode of all 15 eps? This is difficult. I love the more dramatic and powerful episodes like 2.05 and 2.07 but I really love the pilot. If I had to choose just one it would be 2.07. The trial is brutal but it showcases all the amazing writing, acting, set design, and camera work even if I watch it with tears running down my cheeks.

My favorite scene from any episode is probably Lestat's "little drink" scene with Louis. That is unbelievably hot and never gets less hot no matter how many times I watch it. But specifically, this shot in the room before they get started. The feelings. oof!

Picking a favorite character is probably the most difficult. Lestat has always been the love of my life (since I read IWTV & TVL at 10 years old) but I truly adore all of the main characters in the books and series.

I don't really have a favorite ship. I ship them all with whoever. I am incredibly intrigued by all relationships that Armand has, but no ship in Anne's world is more important to me than another. Each pairing helps us understand something about the characters which is why she shipped them all over the place with each other. LoL

The book answer is easy - The Vampire Lestat. Here's a link to a recent post I made about my 30 year old copies of the books. I read TVL until it fell apart multiple times but I still have it on my shelf.

Favorite chapter from my favorite book or from any of the books? Both? LoL My favorite chapter of TVL is chapter 1 of Part 3: Viaticum for the Marquise (when Lestat turns Gabrielle). My favorite chapter from the entire Chronicles is Chapter 4 of The Vampire Armand. Not only did Anne write one of the most beautiful dead doves, but she tossed in a little of her BDSM flavor in that chapter as well. The scene with Marius and Amadeo's brattiness is delicious every time I read it.

My favorite quote from the series is I had powers now and decades of rage to process, and it was both random and unfortunate the man picked that night to dabble in fuckery. - Louis

My favorite quote from the books is probably the opening of TVL: I am the Vampire Lestat. I'm immortal. More or less. The light of the sun, the sustained heat of an intense fire —these things might destroy me. But then again, they might not.

[fire-emblem-drabbles]

Pairing: Karlach x durge reader, Gortash x durge reader

Prompt: Some thoughts I had when I brought my dark urge and romanced Karlach to face Gortash.

Description: Having just survived a divine revelation from daddy dearest Bhaal and making your way to Wyrm's Rock, you're a little shaken but ready to face whatever Gortash may throw at you. You wanted to see Karlach have her revenge as sure as it was your own. Yet... something familiar and strange stirs within your blackened heart when you look at Gortash. And most frighteningly, he looks to you the same.

Rating: sfw

Word Count: 2678 3037

Notes: Happy 4:30 am I got off work and like a man possessed wrote this. It's not edited (yet) but if I don't post this and get validation I may just fucking die so. Have this terrible little brain baby! I just think it would be so tastey. No one wins here btw!

oh this is huge spoilers for dark urge/act 3 btw! I took some liberties but it's my fanfiction and I can if I want to

Edited: 10/1/23 (read it and there was a lot of mistakes lol)

Curiosity has guided you far, in this adventure. It’s helped you find the pieces of your past life, both those that proved to be a boon and that which you would have rather left buried. You’ve repressed your dark urges, fought them, proved to yourself and your allies, and especially your lover, that you’re better than that. Better than the person you once were. Better than what your father would have you be.

And it’s never been more clear than when you stand before Gortash now. You can feel Karlach before you, bristling at seeing his face. The way Wyll panics at seeing his father, obviously not himself. Gale, too, is is all wound up-- the emotions held in this room are fit to burst, and you and Gortash are the center of it.

You felt a flicker of it before, when seeing his face in the Ilithid colony beneath Moonrise. There was familiarity there; not the burning hatred that seized your heart when you looked at Orin, nor the cool indifference you felt upon taking Kethric’s life but something far different. The closet thing to normal you felt from your previous life. It scared you more than the murder, than the blood on your hands and the bile burning the back of your tongue.

He felt like home. A feeling you thought only Karlach could bring about you, of calm and happiness acceptance and all things nice and lovely that father would surely disapprove of. And when he speaks, when his disgusting honeyed voice and hardened gazes softens upon landing to you, when “My favorite assassin,” leaves his silvered tongue, you can see whispers of the past before you.

A part of it, mind, you might have preferred to keep lost. It comes in flashes and fuzzy moments, in warm feelings and beating heart. Your hand, held in his; your lips lost together. Bodies tangled and thoughts lost... You linger in those memories a moment, remembering how right it all felt. And thinking, how funny, even back then you were pulling away from father's puppet strings.

As you come back to the present, you're left stunned silent a moment, as his words flow in one ear and out of the other. This is Gortash-- the man who sold Karlach to the Arch Devil Zariel, who abducted Wyll’s father and whose manipulating the cult of the absolute and all the people of Baldur’s gate all at once-- and he’s the man who helped you learn what love is.

It's also so sickeningly familiar, the way your heartbeat picks up upon meeting his gaze. How he reserves an easy smile just for you, even if you’ve seen it hundreds of times. You have to close your eyes, to reach out and take Karlach’s hand despite how hot she’s grown. It's almost too much for you, to remember how happy you were with Gortash when you've been fighting for so long to find a way to keep being happy with Karlach.

“Solider?” Even through her own anger, her own disgust and sorrow and rage and madness, Karlach pauses, (your whole party does, in fact) in seeing the familiarity between the two of you. Seeing the effect Gortash has on you, their dauntless leader, their dear friend. If only they knew who they were calling their ally now...

“Holy shit,” Is all you can manage out in the moment. So many thoughts, little forgotten memories blink past your eyes. Karlach squeezes your hand, and you squeeze back just to let her know you’re still there.

“I didn’t think I’d have quite that strong of an effect on you,” he chuckles and you hate how you can tell it’s from genuine affection, and not twisted glee. He truly is glad to see you-- and why shouldn’t he be? It can't have been that long ago that the two of you were lovers.

“Don’t flatter yourself,” You have to steel yourself in front of him, in front of your friends. But how can you deny it? Things have always been this way between the two of you. Delicate and strange and so wrong as to feel right.

“It’s nice to see you haven’t changed.” That charming smile, turned business as he turns to face your party whole. “I was worried, after Orin did you in. But I should have known you would return, find your way back to me.” He’s all confidence as he speaks, and you notice its mostly to you. It’s almost as if the room isn’t filled with courtesans, as if your party isn’t there to back you up. Like you aren’t clutching to Karlach like a lifeline.

“You’ll… have to fill in the finer details.” You admit softly, frown fitting your face. “I’ve reclaimed bits and pieces of my former memory but I’m afraid much of my former…” You hesitate as you consider who you were before all this “...life is beyond me.” You decide to remain as passe as possible. But perhaps he already knows you remember. Actually, your certain he does-- there’s a look of mischief twinkling in his eyes that surely only you can see. But cruelty is in his nature, as begets the chosen of Bane. You’re lucky, then, that for you, and only you, his urge can be diminished into something a little more charming.

“Why, without you this cult would be nothing! Well, without us.” He laughs again and you can feel your companions eyes upon you. “You and I came up with this whole plan-- to steal the crown of Karsus, overpower the elder brain, and use its powers to create a loyal army of cultists… if Orin hadn’t overthrown you, things wouldn’t be near a mess as they are now.” He rolls his eyes dramatically, a sigh fitting past his lips. “That sister of yours is quite the handful, and far less careful about controlling her urges. Why, with you back, and with Kethric’s nether stone no less, I dare say we have a chance to get things back in line again.”

“_____, what is he talking about? Why is he talking like he knows you?” Karlach’s voice tears through your thoughts, just as you feel her warm hand leave yours, and your party's gaze all land on you.

“Oh Karlach, dear sweet Karlach…” Gortash speaks again. “Are you certain you want to hear that?” Your breath hitches as he speaks. You were hoping Gortash would have more decorum than to admit what the two of you once hand. Perhaps its obvious to him how you feel about Karlach now. Maybe you looked at him the same way, once; maybe you are now.

Perhaps then, it's jealously that causes him to speak. You can't imagine how he must feel, seeing someone he got rid of so long ago stroll up with the person he thought was taken from him. Yes, now that you think about it, that would make him quite mad...

“You shut the fuck up, Gortash!” Karlach raises her voice before you even think to speak; Gortash merely smirks, speaks again with mockery lacing his tone.

“Indeed, _____, why don’t you enlighten your friends, your lover, about your past self?” Your name spoken from his lips was so, so nice. It made you ache in a sickeningly familiar way. And so too, was the venom in his when he spoke of your lover. Of Karlach…

“They know,” You manage to croak out. “With the tadpole they saw… saw the vision my father sent to me.” One that you had gotten hardly an hour before coming here, even. That you were a Bhaalspawn, of your dearest fathers own flesh. That you were his chosen before Orin struck you down. You knew that wasn't what he met. You were desperate to hide this-- like when your urge first overcame you, when that poor girl Alfira's blood stained your hands and camp...

“Then surely, you remember, about us?” Daring as ever, Gortash moves forward, to cup your chin tenderly with his gauntlet that held his nether stone.

How easy it would be, to twist the arm that dared hold you, to rip that precious nether stone from the sorry hand that dared touch your hallowed flesh.

“Us? What is he talking about?” You could hear the desperation in Karlach’s tone, even if you couldn’t see her. Your eyes were locked with Gortash’s, lost in them really. “_____, why are you letting him touch you?” Even from here, you could feel her heat. She was angry, so angry that he dare touch you. But scared, too. Scared that you weren't even trying to stop him.

You tear away from Gortash’s intense gaze, gently remove his hand from your person and ignore your urge. And so to, ignore the urge to reach out for Gortash in return. So many parts of yourself you have to deny, it was getting hard to know what’s really you…

“Fine. Fine!” You raise your own voice, uncaring of the puppets in the room. You turn to Karlach, to the only reason you’ve gotten this far. “You deserve to know anyways.” Still, you heave a sigh, for what is a heavier burden than the truth? “Yes, before Orin betrayed me, I was the chosen of Bhaal. But beyond that…” Even still, as the truth lingers on your lips, tingles on the tip of your tongue, you hesitate as you meet Karlach’s gaze-- as you filter to Gale and Wyll as well.

Your breath dies a moment as you see how worried they are for you. You’re scarcely worth such kindness, moreso from such good people as them. “Gortash and I were… close. Far closer than any plan may have merited. One might have even called it love, if you believe such evil capable of it.” You admit, looking to the floor. You wouldn’t be able to take the look of betrayal in their faces, nor the grin Gortash surely wore.

“I…” You can feel the way the anger leaves Karlach. Even if she didn’t want to show it you can feel through that dammed tadpole how numb she suddenly feels. “Right. You guys finish” She gestures vaguely to you, to Gortash “whatever the hell this is. I gotta go.” You don’t even have the heart to stop her. Don’t have the courage to watch her retreating form.

“Karlach, hold on!” Gale is quick to follow. You’d have to thank him for that. For doing what you should be doing. You can feel Wyll’s hesitation. But he stays. You’d have to thank him too. You don’t want to be alone (as much as the word means in a room fool of likely tadpoled individuals like yourself) with Gortash right now. Even if Wyll is just staying for his own father.

“There she goes.” Gortash is brazen now, wrapping an arm around your shoulder and pulling you in to his chest. You don’t know if it’s right to be this close to him, to hug him like you so desperately want to. “I do miss our time together. We could be still be together, work together. It would be my honor to restore you to your former glory-- to help you regain your title as Bhaal’s chosen once more.” The idea fills you with twisted glee. You recall, with errie smile, how Gortash was once wrapped around your little finger. How easy it could be to twist him to your designs, and kill him when it suited you most. How it would please father, how it would only make you stronger, to get such a distraction out of your life.

“That’s not who I am anymore.” You say with much force, creating some distance between you and Gortash. You're not sure if its about the two of you being together, or you being Bhaal's chosen. Still, he does not falter. He gets down on one knee before you, looking up at you with adoration. You hate it. You love it. It’s disgusting and beautiful and you know this isn’t the first time he’s been on his knees for you. Play your cards right, it may not even be his last.

“Even so, I can see how much your heart cries out for revenge. You mean to kill Orin, and as it happens I want her dead as well.” Again, beautiful hands, coveted nether stone, circle around your own. “We could rule together. Even your little… friends.” This was your plan, after all. Your genius that got this terrible cult going.

“Just what are you proposing?” You can’t help but squeeze his hands. Can’t deny the beat of your heart-- for the evil within must hear this promise of power. Coming from a man you may even still hold dear a part so strong it can't look away.

“We reforge our alliance. Bring our empire to fruition. My steel watch won’t harm you, so long as you kill Orin and bring her nether stone back.”

“_____…” Wyll’s voice surprises you. For a moment, it really was you and Gortash, and the empire you stood to create. “I know this must be a hard decision for you. Gortash seems to know you better than you do yourself this moment. But we need to consider all our options.” He reminds you. Pushing you towards neither extremes at this moment. A level head when yours was, as always, a shambling mess. "Remember how far we've come. How far you've come."

“That’s not a decision I can make right now.” You admit, hastily pulling away from Gortash. His face falters a little as he rises to his feet. “There’s a lot I need to consider.” When he stands tall again, looking to you, that familiar cocky grin is again in place.

“I understand. You always make the right choice in the end. But, just to prove my loyalty,” That word stings just a little. You hadn’t proved loyal to most anyone who trusted you, at least in this particular moment. “I’ll share this with you; an impostor is at your camp, right now.” You frown again as you look to him.

“Orin…” You grit your teeth as you consider your sister, how any one of the people you had come to trust with your life could be the backstabber herself.

“So if I were you, I’d act quick.” He smiles at you but you see how it doesn’t meet his eyes. “So, my dear, why don’t you stay for my coronation?” He laughs softly as he turns towards Duke Ravengard, who seems more statue than man at this moment.

You do just that, watch with wary gaze and heavy heart as Enver Gortash is ordained ‘Archduke Gortash’. Many tough decisions lie ahead of you and you couldn’t will yourself to think on a single one of them as you watched Gortash rise with a new fervor. He seeks your gaze, your approval, as the room erupts with applause. But it’s high time you left, to figure out what to do next.

You climb down the barren halls of Wyrm’s Rock with Wyll, unsure what to say or do next. You feel like you’ve had enough adventure and learning of your old life for once day, but of course Gortash gave you fear to return to your own camp as well…

“Are you alright?” Wyll stops you as you slowly walk towards the south span of Wyrm’s rock, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder. You jump at his touch, only to sigh and relax when you realize it's just him.

“No not really, that was a lot for me.” You admit with a shaky laugh.

“I… were you truly involved with Gortash before… well, before?” He frowns, the look on his face hard to read.

“I… yes. I was.” It would be no use to lie.

“And now?” He asks, unexpectedly. “What now?”

“What now indeed.” You sigh and lean into him. Wyll supports your weight with a good natured hug. “I love Karlach, Wyll. I love her so much. But… old feelings linger in my twisted mind. Gortash was…” You shake your head. How can you explain that who you were, who you use to be… Gortash was the only person that you respected? That seemed to understand you, to meet you at your level? Even now as you thought of it, more cursed thoughts of your time together came back to you. It hurt, mentally and physically.

“I can’t say I understand, friend, but I know yours is a troubled past.” He pulls back from you, smile fitting his handsome face. “I think it would be best for us to head back to camp for the day.” He guides you that way, and you decide to follow his judgment.

“I just… hope that Karlach is okay. Had I known, I…” You shake your head. How could you have known? In a past life, you were lovers with the very man that ruined her life. The man that made it difficult for you two to even start a relationship to begin with.

“Rest, friend. You can’t of helped that.” You nod. He was right. But that still left you in the middle of some ridiculous love triangle…

You just have to decide, dearest, darkest urge, who is most important to you; Enver Gortash, Bane’s Chosen, tyrant of Baldur’s Gate and the matching mind to your own criminal plot to rule it all… or Karlach Cliffgate, the woman he ruined in the pursuit of his own power, and the one you promised to help end him.

Either way, there would be betrayal. Heartbreak. And fighting, for sure.

You could, of course, kill them both. That would solve so many problems for you! Feed your urge, please your father, and remove any obstacle that would distract from your goal. Wouldn’t it be delicious, to drink in their desire, thinking they’ve won your favor-- only for you to break that precious trust as their bodies twist under your blade…

This all of course assuming you could fight off your dark urge still... Rest would not come easy tonight, if at all. But it wouldn't be the first time. Come what may, you would forge your path forward.

[naraven]

Marlboro and a Can of Arizona Ice Tea

hi so. this came to me in a vision

this is all platonic/familial btw! reader can be read as around 22-23 ish and haitham is in his late 20s, early 30s and sometimes people don't really like that kind of age gap plus i think alhaitham as a tired dad figure is way funnier somehow

this is pretty ooc!! not in the way he talks but like i lwk don't think he would act like this LOL to me these two are the family ever

tw / alcohol but its brief in the beginning, addiction to nicotine and specifically smoking, talk about reader gaining weight as a symptom of withdrawal, and general symptoms of addiction that might be triggering so please be wary!

wc / 2.1k

also this sounds really obvious but i don't condone smoking!!! i believe anyone and everyone is capable of quitting and living the best life they can without nicotine.

You need help.

Serious help? Maybe not at this point, but you can certainly see yourself in some deep shit pretty soon.

And it all started when you graduated.

Your brand new degree was fresh and crisp. You celebrate with all your friends, glad that you all somehow survived the four years up to that point. You screamed your head off when you partied later that night, alcohol basically coating your entire insides. Your liver would probably murder you before dying.

That was when you took your first cigarette.

Nowadays, it seemed that vapes and e-cigs were all the rage. You could honestly give less than half a shit. And really, you don't even remember who offered it to you. The white stick somehow ended up between your fingers and an outstretched hand with a lighter lit it up for you.

You took a drag, and coughed up violently. It tasted like filthy waste, smoke clouding your throat and building up in your lungs. Clouds of gray puffed out of your mouth with each heavy heave.

Somehow, you ended up burning through the entire stick. After the first initial puff, you went in for another because that was just embarrassing. Soon enough, the yellow end was all that remained in your hand. It felt almost electrifying, fueled by adrenaline and nicotine running through your body. Basically, you felt high on life.

Not wanting to ruin the fun with a fire, you escaped to a less crowded area and found an ashtray filled with other finished cigarettes. Your own joined in the dozens of yellow ends sticking up into the air. 

And then after graduation, of course, came moving out. Luckily you had planned ahead during your finals week while procrastinating and found the perfect place to live: a semi-decent two room apartment with affordable rent. Basically, the best place for a soon to be master's student. Undergraduate dorming would no longer be viable for you.

Waitering part time has left you with a pretty good amount of money, too. It would, for now, be able to support your new apartment.

So begins the current day you. Tired, stressed, and chronic smoker.

Ever since that party, you went out and bought a pack of Marlboro from the liquor shop that was about a block away from your apartment. It was tiny and smelled too strongly of gasoline, but they had Marlboro and Arizona Ice Tea. That alone was a good enough excuse to visit every free weekend you had. Which just so happened to be every weekend.

You paid in cash, with the tips that you would get at the end of every week. You would just leave your wallet at home, fish out $15 in cash, and leave with your phone and keys. The bare necessities, because you were semi-scared of being robbed for some reason. 

You swear the cashier at the liquor store has something against you. Every time you hand him the bills in your pocket you swear he's glaring at you.

It's whatever. You get your tea and cigs, he gets your money. Simple as that. 

You tip him every once in a while. You bring an extra dollar to the usual $13.86 you pay and slip the single dollar into the small glass case labeled "tips: thank you for the generosity!"

You never speak to the cashier, either. You only started talking to him because the cigarettes were behind him. The first time he spoke was when he scanned your items silently as the scanner beeped, said "13.86," and didn't even say have a good day. But you know what, good for him. Working with tough customers, you can understand some of the stuff he goes through. 

After that he never speaks to you again. He gets used to seeing you walk in and grab a can of Arizona tea from the fridge. He already has a pack of Marlboro on the counter by the time you're there.

And so life went on. Life went on until 6 months later, when on a particular Saturday evening you speak up.

"Can I have another pack?"

The cashier's face remains the same. He turns to his left and reaches for another pack of Marlboro cigarettes.

"26.73."

You brought your wallet for today. You were too lazy to calculate how much you needed to bring. Future master's degree student, everyone. 

You dig out a 10 and 20 dollar bill. You take the two packs into your hand while he still counts your change.

"You know smoking kills, right?"

You almost jump at the sound of his voice. He never, ever spoke to you. His words also, oddly enough, offended you.

"You work here, I'm giving you more money. Do you say that to everyone who buys a pack from here?"

You raise a brow as he hands you your change. He starts talking again when you open the small pack.

"Today's the only day I work here. You're also the only regular I see."

"Damn, part time only on a single day? Your day job must be nice."

You curse under your breath when you realize your lighter ran out of fuel. You sheepishly look up at the cashier who simply sighs, already hitting the numbers on the cash register.

"3.63.”

~~~

About a month after that, you started a small conversation.

"I've decided that I'm going to reform. I'm buying a vape!"

You refrain from laughing at the grimace on the cashier's face. His teal-amber eyes scrutinize you and he remains speechless.

"Oh, c'mon. I heard these are like a healthier alternative."

You inspect the pod as the cashier pulls out a pamphlet from underneath the counter. As you read through it, he explains what it is.

"A whole 20 pack of cigarettes has the same amount of nicotine in a single vape pen. Where did you even get your information from?"

You look at the infographic carefully, not hearing his words very clearly.

"No shit? I had no clue. Well then, I'll see how this peach flavored pen tastes, otherwise it's back to the classic for me!"

“Not so fast. Here.”

Before you can leave, he stops you in your tracks. The cashier grabs something opposite of his side of the counter.

“On the house. Slow to melt candy is another way smokers quit.”

A wrapped piece of candy is placed in your palm. You unwrap it and suddenly you feel like a child again. Sweet sugar coats your mouth instead of smoke, and you can kind of get behind this.

“No shit? I’ll keep that in mind.”

~~~

A month later, he's the one that talks first.

"On the house."

He hands you a blue package. Upon reading the big white letters, you see it's a box of nicotine patches.

"Are you… serious?"

You mutter incredulously. There's no way he was being for real right now. Yeah, sure, the nicotine was getting pretty rough by now, but there’s no way you look that bad. Right?

"I'm not taking this. Have it back."

He blinks, staring at the box in your hands. You glare when he does nothing to try and grab it.

"If you're worried about paying for it, I already paid for it. Take it."

The fucking audacity of this guy… You instead slam the box on the counter, since he wasn't willing to take it back from you himself. You could quit anytime, you didn’t need his help in this.

"I said I don't fucking want it."

You leave the store. In your rage, you don't even realize that you left with only your tea in hand, Marlboro left on the counter along with the nicotine patches you very violently placed down.

And so you suffer throughout the week. The itch for a hit of nicotine is strong, but you don't have the time to go out and buy one. Final exams had you studying for hours at a time without much time for anything else. And when you go out to eat dinner with a couple friends to chill before final exams really start going, you struggle to think straight and accidentally snap at a friend. You immediately regret it and apologize but you are clearly not doing ok.

You avoid going to the liquor store too. Partially because of the one time someone offered you help you pushed them away and it felt awkward just walking back like nothing happened and partially because, of course, of exams.

You can't sleep, and that barely helps with your appetite. Never in your life had you ever felt so hungry all the time. When you stare at yourself in the mirror, you very much look heavier and unhealthier than ever.

Exams pass. You can't say you're very confident that you passed any of them.

So you trudge your way back to the usual place for a smoke. You cough the entire way there, almost gagging a couple times before finally arriving.

Despite the distance being the same, the walk there felt so much longer. You struggle to breath at a normal rate and the only thought in your mind is getting a lit cigarette in your mouth.

You can feel the familiar green-red eyes on your back. When you open the fridge to the Arizona tea do you finally turn to stare back at him. 

Neither of you say anything. When you get there, the usual pack waiting for you is gone.

"Please just take this."

Instead, the blue box of nicotine patches is there. Replacing the usual gold and white box is instead something that you know you should have used long ago.

"...Why do you care so much anyway?"

Your voice is hoarse, and you let out a particularly nasty cough. You wince when your throat burns at the surplus amount of coughing you've been doing.

"Because you look about the same age as my students, if not younger. Someone as young as you shouldn't be suffering from this."

He crosses his arms. You open the blue box and pull out a patch that looks like a sticker. You like stickers.

"For now, peel one off and put it on your bicep. It'll last for about 24 hours. I'll send a couple links about what you can do afterwards. There will be side effects. Hand me your phone."

In a daze, you slide your phone out of your back pocket and place it on his outstretched palm.

"This is a timer. You reset it everytime you relapse." The cashier shows you the app he laid out on your phone. Oddly enough, you feel rather comforted knowing he's doing all this.

"You are the only person who can reset it. If you relapse and decide not to restart the timer, no one will know. The only person holding you accountable is yourself. I will not scold you for relapsing. It is very difficult to overcome any kind of addiction." He places the phone back into your hand and slides the blue box of patches towards you.

Wow, you weren't even sure what to say back to that. So instead you stare at the dual colored eyes of the familiar cashier.

"... Y'know, for a liquor store cashier you care a lot about your customers. I'll rate you 5 stars on Yelp. 'The kind cashier sabotaged his own business for a pitiful customer like me.'"

He looks concerned, brows furrowing. You wonder if you said anything to offend him.

"I don't care about this place. In fact, if it shuts down then it's all the better for me."

You blink.

"Huh?"

"I'm only working here because I owed the manager of the store a favor. If this place closes down I can focus more on my job and get a promotion sooner."

A moment passes before you let huff out a laugh.

"No shit? Whatever you say."

You realize you don't know this man's name. You've known each other for almost a year and you never bothered to learn his name.

Wow, it's crazy to think that you moved into your apartment a year ago. The complex felt more homely, and you could relax at home without it feeling weird. You felt a sense of belonging in this tiny cramped liquor store. You walked to and from this place so often it was basically a second home.

"Just stay safe and healthy. That's all that you can do for me at the moment." 

His voice was so… warm. You try not to cry as you feel the weight of his tone.

"Right, whatever you say. Also, I never got your name, cashier guy. Care to tell me who my nic addiction savior is?"

Maybe you joked about your situation a bit too early. But the cashier only places the blue box into your hands, wrapping his hands around yours to curl over it.

"Call me Alhaitham. Just trying to help."

[kingmagnificoofrosas]

Hi. So I’ve been enjoying your blog for a few days now and I just want to say ‘thank you’ for giving King Magnifico fans the safe space they deserve. Thank you for giving King Magnifico the safe space he deserves.

I tried to find other blogs that defend him the way you do but I couldn’t. I agree with you 100% on Magnifico and honestly think he was the only good part of the movie.

You’ve inspired me to create an OC of my own to ship with him. I’m remaining anonymous and don’t want to tell you about them because I don’t want to offend you, due to your faith. But I will dedicate the OC side blog to you once it’s open.

Without you, I would’ve felt like a silly 37 yr old caring so much about a Disney character. Especially while I’m going through a hard time. Now I will preserve my endangered mental health by spending time on developing my character and my Magnifico fan blog.

Please keep it up. You’ve given me a Magnifico safe space and have inspired others to celebrate their love of this character.

Oh my goodness!!! *emotional noises*

I'm so immensly moved I'm struggling to find the right words. Thank you doesn't even feel enough! I feel beyond happy and honored that I've managed to help, inspire, motivate and comfort people. That's what I want to do and if I manage to, it fills my heart with so much gratitude and joy!

But really, without you guys, I wouldn't be standing where I'm standing with my blog at this point.

I loved Magnifico from the moment I first saw him on screen and as soon as I understood enough of his story, it was more than clear to me, that I had to not only create a safe space for fans who - just like me - realized that he isn't a villain but also a place where I can fight against the very toxic stance against traumatized people and mental disorders.

And no! Never feel bad or silly for loving something because of your age! Age doesn't matter. I'm in my late 20s and one of my friends is already 30 so 🤷🏻‍♀️ Who's to tell us we cannot love certain things anymore just because we aren't kids/teenagers anymore? People who spread such information aren't better than all those other bullies and they're obviously wrong. You can be a 100 years old and still love plushies and dolls, or Legos, or disney - it's not just for kids!

Also, while I'm more than pleased to see that more and more people start siding with Magnifico and becoming vocal that he's not a villain but a traumatized protagonist, I'm also greatly concerned by people still shaming, ridiculing, belittling and villainizing trauma.

The fact that Disney itself has pushed those toxic stigmas is beyond me! Just like one of my greatest fellow defenders stated : When did bullying a traumatized person into uncontrollable rage become acceptable? When did it become acceptable to villainize traumatized people? Since when does the message "true love breaks every curse" matter no more?

When did people lose so much compassion and became ok with pushing hate and unforgiveness?

Standing up for trauma and defending those people is not justifying wrong actions! It's calling awareness! Compassion and love! It's explaining and drawing a big difference!

There are so many toxic statements I hear people make toward traumatized people and people with mental disorders. And I think it's one of the cruelest, most disgusting and heartless things!

Magnifico has become a symbol for so many and a beacon to rise awareness to trauma and the toxic stance of disney and some people out there.

Btw, Japan has even created a hashtag that celebrates Magnifico. The japanese have been stressing from the start that Magnifico isn't a villain. The japanese amazing! ✨️

So, I thank you for being a part of this incredible supportive, growing defender squad! I'll keep doing my best to fight for what's right and keep this blog growing ✨️

I wish you all the best from the bottom of my heart! ❤️ And again, thank you so very much!

[breastforce]

hey, so like if you want an honest explanation of someone who once went so deep in the paint he wrote a trans!femme craig headcanon entitled 'butch' over the course of an absolutely feral christmas vacation: I liked south park as a dumbass baby because my empathy wasnt finished developing yet and it made me laugh harder than family guy did. You see the same thing in the invader zim fandom, people who liked it as closeted queers with a lot of unexplained rage and cynasism they dont have a word for yet, projecting all their weird feelings onto this incredibly hostile cartoon. as you age you learn to be kind, and end up sorta. retroactively looking at that angry little gay kid you used to be with less cringe and more sympathy. Then you go back and watch some episodes and yeah they're problematic, seem to hate YOU in particular as a jewish gay kid, but because you're a jewish gay kid you feel like you're allowed to laugh at it. and then you wonder what other people online are saying, and get sucked into the weird vortex of other people who are trying to be kind to their shitty confused middle school selves by... refusing to remember what the actual show was.

This is the perspective of someone pushing 30 btw, i have no idea what current 14 y olds get out of it.

Well, asked and answered!

[missgoldberry]

It's not about being secret, it's about the way they say they want to be private and then play games with the fandom, posting hints that tehy're together (especially A and other Luke's friends). And are you really ok with these huge age gaps? I struggle to see what they have in common with these young people

Look I don't love huge age gaps when one person is very young. Luke and Antonia have less years between them but it seems like he was looking for a young/less successful girlfriend and that's icky to me. It seems like Nic and Jake were friends and then something developed which is more understandable to me but the gap between 37 and 24 is huge at that age (34 and 47 for example wouldn't be a big deal to me at all lmao). I wish they both were in more age appropriate relationships. But at the end of the day everyone involved is an adult. I do struggle to imagine the appeal, I'm 30 rn and I wouldn't want to date someone in their early 20s at all. But I do have some friends who are younger and they're not all the same, with some I genuinely feel we have an equal friendship and some younger people I know seem so so young and immature that I would struggle to spend any time one on one. And I kind of hate bringing up supposed maturity because "being mature for your age" is what every young person thinks about themselves, and the way every person dating much younger justifies it. But there is truth to that, not every young person is the same, just as not every older person is the same. You can be in a similar place in your life in your 20s and your 30s. To give an example from my own life, when I was about 25 I became really close friends with my coworker who is 21 years older than me. Now obviously there was nothing romantic about it at all (we're both in long term relationships AND he's gay) but we hung out all the time together and it truly didn't feel like there was 20+ years between us because we were in a similar life stage at the time? We worked at the same job, making a similar amount (I made more actually because I was working there longer), we both had long term relationships but weren't married and had no kids (and no plans for it), we both wanted to buy better places to live but had no money, we liked similar books and movies and had similar interests. Now I'm absolutely not denying that he had way more life experiences than me, and we obviously weren't dating or living together so that's also a very different dynamic. And if I saw a 25 and 46 year olds dating I would be side eyeing it hard. But I'm just saying that there doesn't always have to be a huge power imbalance between ages, you can legit connect with someone much older/younger and it doesn't have to be weird. The whole "what are they talking about" debate seems silly to me because you can connect with people of different ages than you. Btw me and that guy are not friends anymore because he turned out to be a raging transphobe.

Now when it comes to playing with fandom… I don't think there's nearly as much playing as people believe lmao. The truth is that fans will dig through backgrounds of pictures, look at windows and floors to draw their conclusions and you can't avoid it. And I know the argument is always "well they know fandoms are like this so they shouldn't post these things" but like?? That's kind of ridiculous. Imagine asking your partner to not post from vacations because people might analyze palm trees, or say they're not allowed to wear your hat (or a hat identical to yours), or forbid them from following who they want on socials, or avoid touching them when in public, especially once people already know you're together. Like that's an insane ask and not a good way to live. It's one thing to not blast your relationship on social media (which I think is a good idea if you're famous) but constantly living in fear of someone figuring out you're with your partner is fucking stupid imo. I do think, at least in the case of Luke and Antonia, that they did 'play' with fandom a bit because they wanted to make sure people knew they were together. Like the polaroids for example were very very intentional. And tbh it kind of makes sense, I'm sure it's very difficult to date an actor who has to go on a world tour for months when you just recently started dating, and he's being loved up with his costar, and everyone wants them to be together. It would be hard for many people, especially for a 23 year old who's probably in her first serious relationship. So yes I think they made some obvious moves on social media 🤷‍♀️ But that's not a crime and it doesn't contradict that they want their relationship to remain private. They just want it to be known that there is a serious relationship here. And Nicola and Jake I think are just living their life, not trying to hint at anything but also not hiding.

[ocrpfinder]

🦇🩸 | 21 y/o Transmasc writer looking for 18+ only writers for a fandomless ( oc / oc ) mxm or mascxmasc rp! My character is transmasc just a heads up! Open to extra queer themes with other trans characters! Lazy lit to Novella Rp! No rapid fire! Discord only! I work night shift so replies can be spotty during the day! Some settings I’m looking for are violent and corrupt dystopians, post apocalyptic dystopians, monster fantasy ( vampires/werewolves/etc ), gang/mafia/crime settings, 90’s setting, omegaverse, etc! Also willing to do fandom inspired plots! Despite my characters default bio he is subject to change for the plot as long as I still have some of my original headcanons/lore in there; like personality for example! The dynamics I’m hoping to get are tense, drama filled, toxic, abusive, angsty relationships, with complicated feelings for complicated characters — my guy being just as hesitant and scared for a real relationship as yours but oh so desperate for connection.

I especially want to include 🪦🕊️Dead Dove with violent and dark themes ranging from murder, horror, crime, gangs, gorey violence, toxic or abusive relationships, incest, noncon or dubcon, age gaps, etc. I have few limits to what I’ll write! Smut wise I’d like to keep the story plot driven regardless of smut; but I’m okay with frequent smut to 30/70 smut to plot ratios. My character is a bottom and sub but he is NOT a darling, soft, meek type of guy! He’s a spitfire, he’s toxic, and he can be abusive/violent just the same! Again, this is his default info below, it’s subject to change!

A little about my character: A 4’10” - 5” ft tall street fighter who’s in a gang. Sammy has the body of a rabbit but the heart of a wolf. He’s an insolent, stubborn, younger guy who may be petite but he packs a hard punch and can handle his own to a certain point. His unwavering loyalty and obedience only lies within his gang leader. He might be his pet, but he is in no way tamed. He’s a wildcard. He’s all fire and rage, he absolutely refuses to back down or bite his tongue. He’d find a way to give lip even if his tongue was cut out. All around his familial relationships are shit to say the least. He doesn’t trust easily, he’s paranoid, cold hearted on the outside, and violent. Like a mad dog he’ll snap without warning, his fangs are always bared, and his lips are always curled in a snarl. He’s hooked on cigarettes and booze, and he can’t last without his mood stabilizers. He works at an underground fight club and can often be seen sporting bars, even if he isn’t of age for a plot. The club is a front for the gang. I do often prefer to write Sam in a violent dystopian like setting where crime is rampant, bodies are in the streets, the city’s in chaos, etc. Think the purge almost. Otherwise, he’s just got a rough life on the streets in a gang. ( His age can vary for the plot btw! I primarily write him as 20 default, and 25 the oldest though. )

That’s a wrap to my yapping, we can do that more in dm’s if we click and plot together! Just an fyi I will not be able to write full on replies THIS week, life stuff, but I’ll hopefully still be available to plot! Leave a like if you’re interested though! I’ll get back to you asap!

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