#their joy is getting me thru the pain

[eastoncowan]

the 4459 celly replay… i am healed…

[munamania]

best part of my day is gonna be the massive hit of pillow and blanky when i get home from work

[thueenz]

they should invent a me that doesnt overfill sandwiches

[othercrossee]

I'm so hellbent on never telling people I'm trans or repeating myself about my pronouns and everything so I get used to being misgendered a lot and ofc people not respecting my pronouns and opinions in general if they were to listen once when I said I'm trans, so it so euphoric to be alone and being like I'm trans, I'm nonbinary and ive never been happier than now

[tia-222]

The void is The quantum field?

I found out about the void back in november 2023 on pinterest, and I joined tumblr because of it. Last night, I came across a tiktok video with the title "how to know if you're in the quantum field in your joe dispenza meditation". The girl in the video basically said things like: -Being disconnected from your 3D reality, how disconnected you are from the 3d from the meditation. -in order to create from the quantum, you can't be in space time, you have to be in time space. -You can't be trying to create from 3D, you have to be creating from "NOTHINGNESS" -going to your inner world Link to the tt video: https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSF1nWtBc/ That's what she said. It hits me when she mentioned the word "nothingness" because the void is basically also the nothingness. The void is being everything and NOTHING at the same time. And I thought does that mean the quantum field and the void are the same thing? so if we do joe dispenza quantum field meditation we can get into the void? So you can simply go into the void/quantum field thru his meditation? I'm not promoting doctor joe dispenza or anything i wouldn't call myself an expert im just someone in the void community. I just thought this could help you guys! Anyway I found some of his quantum meditation on yt: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DwHLLVvPAng&pp=ygUlam9lIGRpc3BlbnphIHF1YW50dW0gZmllbGQgbWVkaXRhdGlvbg%3D%3D https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3PWmCQMKwEw&t=27s&pp=ygUlam9lIGRpc3BlbnphIHF1YW50dW0gZmllbGQgbWVkaXRhdGlvbg%3D%3D https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N_Jz7iy7wN0&t=600s&pp=ygUlam9lIGRpc3BlbnphIHF1YW50dW0gZmllbGQgbWVkaXRhdGlvbg%3D%3D I'd recommend doing the first one which is 1h 30mins bc idk it seems better. It may be long but do it for your desire life. Note: English is not my first language, I have never posted sth like this before idk if my explanations is understandable. I just want to share this everyone in the community.! @voidprincessblog pls help share this to everyone 😭😭😭

Hii love!! omg tysm for this <33.

Yess, the void has many different names to it and the " Quantum Field " is one of them. I've read becoming supernatural by Dr Joe dispenza and it's phenomenal. Many people have entered the Void State/ Quantum Field. I'm gonna talk about this right now and link some stuff from the book that y'all can read from.

What does Dr Joe dispenza say about the " QUANTUM FIELD " ?

" As you enter this endless, vast space as an awareness, there are no bodies, no people, no objects, no places, and no time. Instead, infinite unknown possibilities exist as energy. So if you find yourself thinking about knowns in your life, you are back in the three-dimensional reality of space and time. But if you can stay in the blackness of the unknown for long enough, it will prepare you to create unknowns in your life. "

Success story of how someone got healed Instantly :

" After they unfolded into the quantum field, I then asked them to dimensionalize a scene from their Mind Movie. When the meditation was finished, I instructed them to lie down on the floor—but as Sarah told me later, she couldn’t find the floor. She kept reaching lower and lower, searching for it, but it was no longer there. The next thing she knew, she was in another dimension having a full-on IMAX-like sensory experience—but without her senses. She was living a future scene of her Mind Movie. Enough circuits in her brain had turned on to make her internal experience as real as any external experience she had ever had. She was not visualizing this scene—she was in it, living it.

“I realized I was in another reality, a different time and space—I was in my future,” she explained. “And I was actually performing aerial yoga. I was hanging upside down and the floor wasn’t there. I kept reaching for it, but I was just swinging upside down from this beautiful red silk scarf. I felt freedom from my pain. I was swinging freely in space.” Eventually she did lie down, with tears of joy flowing down her cheeks. When she came out of that meditation, all of her pain was gone.

“I knew I was healed,” she said. “I was in awe of the power of my mind and I felt tremendous gratitude. I continue to manifest things from my Mind Movie—in fact, my Mind Movie can’t even keep up with my life.”

Also, there was an anon from an deactivated blog which spoke about entering the void by using Dr Joe dispenza way. I'm gonna copy and paste it here, and link it too 🖤.

" i have a fabulous book by dr.joe dispenza (how to become supernatural). he talks of the void state or the zero state and how you’re open to all possibilities and timelines. in it, he directed to first become aware of your body, the space you take between the folds of your skin, the space you take in your room, your home, your neighborhood, and the world. now- you must forget all of this and focus only on the black behind your eyelids. you must become no one, no thing, no body, no time in space. you must forget of your accomplishments, your worries, relationships- anything that makes YOU, you. literally on the first “try” of doing what he said i got into the void. it’s so easy i understand how stressful and confusing the void can be but just try to let go of all of that and focus on being nothing. imagine a beam of light going through the black space where your affs travel. stay focused and try not to dwell on the 3D. do not pay attention to the time or if you’re itchy- whatever. just having a clear mind helped me so much. ofc, this is not required but it does help!! " Original link

[raggedytiger]

ragatha/agatha and pomni/penny human hcs!

(r)agatha:

is an english teacher!

yes she still loves horses. she used to ride them, & she loves old western movies.

owns cowboy hat and boots.

analytical and loves long & winding conversations.

has a very happy cat named sandwich.

patches her own clothes, doesn't have kids but if she did she would embroider their names into their belongings.

she still plays cello, she loves music in general, probably sings like an angel.

can't do any mathematics.

can drive, but like a lunatic. somehow has never had an accident though, so it's fine.

probably has a cute little baby blue/yellow car now, but definitely had a beat up offroader truck at some point that got put to good use. or maybe she still does, i'm not the boss.

total lesbian, a bit of a heartbreaker but not intentionally (women just keep falling for her)

goes to town/neighbourhood/community meetings. likely is/was in a knitting circle

absurd number of quilts in her home

pomni/penny:

is an accountant as we know, and cannot cook for shit as we know.

no pets she can barely take herself for walks. is more similar to a cat, but had a dog growing up. would love a collie or a dalmatian probably.

would name the dog something stupid like Thermometer Johnson.

she can drive, but nervously.

really quick thinker, like impressively, unless she's under HUGE amounts of stress. is literally always thinking at 100mph.

no sense of interior decor or personal style. all practical, kind of butch. really does kill a suit.

very much lesbian but not fully to terms with it. probably had short-lived relationships with men in which she was 'content' but didn't really care for it. seeing agatha as agatha for the first time was probably a crazy punch to her little gay heart. not to mention the cowboy gear.

autistic

watches 90s anime to wind down

listens to every single genre of music. passes a lot of time with headphones in, slowly making her way thru the entire world's discography

owns no band merch or anything though she just listens

can't sleep without a fan on, thunderstorm 12hr audio, blackout curtains, weighted blanket, water nearby

does not sleep a lot

both of them (going to call them pomni and ragatha for convenience):

didn't immediately recognise one another. i havent got an exact idea of how they reunited after getting out, but there were tears.

bonded in a very rare and unique way - they got to revel in the newfound joys of real life again. they got to eat delicious food, go on long, unobstructed walks in the real sun, be warmed by it, chew on ice cubes and shiver at the pain, listen to each other's heartbeats, listen to real music, read real books, smell soaps and flowers and sauces. they went to the supermarket together and read all the labels, and bought one of each type of fruit to try between them, and smelled all the candles, and touched all the blankets. spent a lot of time holding hands and kissing and i'm sorry to say, probably having sex, because holy shit, i'm real, you're real, we're real

now live together in ragatha's apartment, after pomni moved out of her small and confusingly-furnished flat.

both of them feel inadequate from time to time. this is resolved by a stern-but-loving talking-to.

sandwich likes pomni very much. pomni doesn't really get cats, but loves sandwich a great deal, and enjoys letting her sleep on her lap.

ragatha is very pleased to see her girls getting along.

ragatha cooks, pomni chops the veg. she often doesn't fuck it up

pomni cleans a lot as a 'thank you for letting me live here, i love you'. she's very much acts of service, ragatha is words & physical touch <3

they watch a lot of movies together. depending on how long they've been stuck, they might have culture to catch up on

ragatha wants to have a house with a garden one day. pomni starts germinating seeds from their fruit & veg like a weird science experiment. ragatha is delighted when she is presented with a baby tomato plant.

clothes are shared. ragatha's are bigger, but most of pomni's are ill-fitting anyway so it can go both ways. ragatha likes to dress pomni up in different outfits and have her do a little fashion show. pomni pretends not to savour the confidence boost.

pomni starts sleeping more

[wiltkingart]

as another fruity tguy i really REALLY love the way u draw men so so much i see your work and i feel warm from head to toe cause you make trans men so beautiful. i can feel in every work that you love transmascs and being a tmasc and it comes thru in every paintstroke to me.

sorry to hijack with a big paragraph but last anon rly spoke to me and i wanted to share my experience if its ok

to last anon-- my journey is perhaps different from others but for me when i started T i also felt like it was the most important, life or death thing, but after spending time on T i found that even if the results werent as Manly as i was hoping for originally, i suddenly found myself in love with the simple fact that i had changed and my body had changed in a way that was on MY terms, even if it wasnt """perfectly passing"". since then ive found that not having T or having to lower my dosage was no longer painful or frightening.. im not sure how else to explain it other than At First, it felt like the testosterone was trying to fight Against the woman that Was my body, to sort of Transform it completely into this Man, but one day i just suddenly realized "oh. im not fighting anymore. and im actually pretty happy" and even tho i wasnt Perfectly masc by a long shot there was suddenly.. peace. i fell in love with my patchy body hair and my funny voice and my weird dick and then to my own suprise i found myself falling in love with the things i used to hate and wanted to get rid of. i suddenly loved my boobs (i wanted top surgery for YEARS before t) i loved my eyelashes, i loved the way my body looked in womens clothes, and i still loved being a man. im still a man and happier with that than ive ever been, but im more feminine now than i really ever have been! and its because suddenly being a man and having this mans body was something that belonged to ME, not to anyone else. this happiness and this body were on MY terms!!! so anon, i hope that you can try hormones and you get to explore the changes that bring you joy and that you find even more joy in the things you never expected before. but if you dont get hrt? youre still one of us always. i hope you will still find the love in your heart for yourself and the man you are regardless. peace and love and trangenderism ❤️

just want to add on that i relate heavily to your part about "falling in love with the things i used to hate and wanted to get rid of" because my chest was one of my biggest source of grief pre-T and could not imagine a life for myself without top surgery, and even injured myself from binding too much. but something about being on hrt and finally seeing and experiencing myself with more masc features (and living my life as a guy, in my own way) gradually flipped a switch in my brain and i started to love my boobs. and then when i stopped T i was worried and scared i would lose that love, but now i actually love them more than ever (if my art wasnt indication enough hehe). there's so many ways to be trans, and be a man, and i'm so grateful i gave myself the patience and space to explore that, and that i can continue to explore and experience joy with it. peace and love and transgenderism forever 💙

[thatsdemko]

falling in love again - p.gasly & c.leclerc

masterlist

requested: y

pairings: Pierre gasly x fem!reader & charles leclerc x fem!reader

warnings: mentions of cheating + anxious thoughts + established relationship + love triangle +mentions of affairs

a/n: boy oh boy has this been a challenge for me to write. six drafts later and this is the final product! and yes there will be a part two! there was a second part to the ask that’s not yet complete! ☺️ also a Pierre girl thru and thru 🫡 so this PAINED me to write. would really appreciate some feedback on this xx

weddings are supposed to be happy occasions. the joining of two people coming together as one. the day every little girl dreams of, has finally come for you.

except it’s not a beautiful dream. it’s far worse.

for the past six months of your engagement, the man who once brought you so much joy and happiness no longer gave you that same excitement. you blamed the cold feet, anxieties, and stress of planning the wedding, but the moment has finally come and you still feel that way.

Pierre gasly, is your fiancé and the most perfect man on all paper and of any girls dreams. he’s kind, sweet, caring, and so beyond loving you swear you don’t deserve him. and truth be told, he doesn’t deserve you. he doesn’t deserve a wife who won’t love him the same that he feels.

matter of fact, since the beginning of the engagement your eyes began to fall towards a particular groomsman— the best man may you add, charles leclerc. you never noticed him right in front of you all this time until it was too late.

charles was the other man, and probably the worst friend ever, because for six months he was the reason you arrived home late, you held off on picking a date, and took away all your fears. he’s the man you so badly want to be walking down the aisle to, but he’s not.

charles has convinced himself he’s okay with it. in fact, he’s more worried you’ll say ‘I do’ instead of I don’t because he knows for a fact you don’t love Pierre. at least not anymore.

he knocks quietly on your door of the church. the music is faint but the over excited giggling from your bridesmaids fills his ears. he’s been given the task by Pierre to check on you and make sure you’ve been eating and staying hydrated. it’s sweet how much he cares, but all you care about is that Charles is there to do the same, and maybe worse.

convince you to leave the alter.

“is it safe for me to enter?” he pushes open the door a smidge, his accent rings through the room to let the girls know it’s not your fiancé, and he’s pulled inside by your maid of honor quickly.

“don’t linger for too long out there! he can’t see her.” she hisses, making sure the door is locked behind them, “she’s in the bathroom.”

she points to the door that’s cracked open, the only person in there is you. you’re crouched on the floor next to a bottle of vodka and a fan. the train of your dress is fluffed out all around you. he can hear your mothers voice over the phone, she got too sick to attend, and is trying to now calm you down. you’re terrified of what you’re about to walk into, you can’t marry him.

you hear the shuffling of dress shoes, and you’re greeted to a man in slacks, but when you look up it’s like he saves you from the worst phone call of your life, “I have to go, mama I’ll call you later.” you hang up quickly trying to get up from the floor, and he rushes to help making sure to not step on the white dress.

he swallows the lump forming in his throat, he can’t believe how gorgeous you look. there’s no amount of words to describe how he feels because he’s on the worst rollercoaster of emotions of his life right now. he wants to be happy for Pierre, but part of him holds onto that hope that you’ll disappear with him. leave all this behind.

“mon amour, you look breathtaking.” he breathes out allowing a tear to slip down his cheek, you frown wiping his cheek with your thumb. it almost would be better if he wasn’t here, but you know why he had to be. he’s Pierre’s best man, and it’s his job to check on you.

“don’t be this way, charles. you’re making it hard.” you whisper watching his back lean against the cracked door to gently close it all the way. you don’t have time for what he’s thinking about, you’re supposed to get married in an hour.

“do you have to marry him?” he asks, it’s a dumb question, but it’s the right one to ask considering you don’t even want to answer it. you don’t want to marry him, but now there’s thousands of people arriving to France today for this particular day. it’d be horrible to not walk down the aisle now.

“charles,” you breathe out, mouth going completely thick and dry you can’t speak. you’re blinking away tears to try to keep your makeup intact, you hate this. absolutely hate it.

“I think if you really want what’s best for him, you’d call this off. you’d leave with me instead and we can just go anywhere. anywhere but here.” he takes your shaking clammy hands in his beginning to kiss your knuckles. he strokes your ring finger that for the first time was bare to the bone. the big rock that once sat there was about to be replaced with a promise. one you couldn’t keep.

“cha–“

“no, y/n. I love you and I know you love me. you told me at rehearsals you don’t love him. I can’t see you being happy with him.” he drops your hands from his and he’s twisting open the bathroom door leaving it open for the girls to rush in and check on you. there was now thirty minutes left until the wedding bells would ring.

he slips out the room and heads back to where Pierre is nervously pacing with yuki attempting to get him to drink water. when Charles walks in Pierre is relieved, “how is she?”

“nervous but good.” charles plays a fake smile patting his friend on the back before taking the seat next to yuki who had inhaled the after smell of your perfume on his suit jacket, “you sneaky bastard.” yuki just mumbles shaking his head.

the time is a ticking bomb, it’s now ten minutes and everyone is beginning to line up. charles has been given the honor to walk you down the aisle since neither of your parents or close family could attend.

your hand presses against his back, allowing it to linger longer than it should’ve, “so where would we go?” you whisper hoping the wedding planner and photographers aren’t listening. you take the bouquet from him using it as a shield to protect your privacy.

“anywhere you want, amour. just say the words.” you both watch the first bridesmaid and groomsman walk down the aisle, both moving up closer to the door. it’s t-minus 5 minutes until your arrival in the church.

there’s a long pause between you two, he’s beginning to grow nervous you won’t back out. you’re beginning to have reality settle in for the first time. this is real life, not a fairy tail or a movie. there was no redos, but there was a chance to bolt.

“how about Asia?” you offer, eyes flickering down at the white flowers in your hands before looking up at him. he shrugs giving you a nod, moving up one more space now.

“I could do Asia, but where in Asia?” he asks, one more step closer. three more groups ahead of you both now.

“Japan? heard it’s beautiful.” you loop your arm through his, you throw the flowers to the side both of you watching them silently fall to the ground making the wedding coordinator pick them up.

“your flowers, mrs.gasly—“

“it’s miss y/l/n. just tell him I’m sorry.”

[notsoattractivearenti]

Two and A Half Men (Christian Pulisic x Fem!Reader x Weston McKennie)

WC: 1.1K

Warnings: none

A/N: ok i'm not sure how to put it properly in the title without looking like a threesome group LMAO but in this fic Christian is reader's partner and Weston is both reader and Chris' best friend. and i'm aware Christian is holding a ball in the cover pic but imagine it’s a baby instead! this one is probably meh but i've been thinking about this idea all day and just had to write it down. hope you guys enjoy and i’d love to hear your thoughts thru ask/reply/reblog 💗 apologies for any errors! feedbacks are highly appreciated 🤍

—

“Knock knock… Can I come in?”

You see Weston’s head peeking through the slightly-opened door, respectfully waiting for you and Christian to let him in.

You wave your hand from the hospital bed to invite him to come inside. Wes carefully opens then closes the door, and quietly walks toward you. You see him bringing two bags of something in one of his hands but you can’t figure out whatever those may be.

“Hey, Y/N!” He gives you a big hug. “How are you feeling, my friend?”

“Hi Wes! Very exhausted, of course, but all good. Thanks for checking in.” You respond weakly.

“Oh I figured!” He laughs. “Christian told me you were in labor for almost 24 hours??? That’s wild! I don’t think I could be as strong as you were!”

You chuckle with a faint smile written on your face. You weren’t lying when you said you are very exhausted – it was a very long and painful process you had to go through to bring your child into the world. But no matter how insanely tiring the labor was, you loved every second of it and would do it all over again.

“Yeah… Wild indeed. Totally worth it, though.”

“By the way,” Weston hands you one of the bags he brought earlier, “I got you sushi. I know you love them and you couldn’t have even one during your pregnancy, so I believe you deserve some.”

“No way! Thank you Wes!” You excitedly unpack the bag and open one of the three boxes of sushi Weston gave you. You haven’t eaten one in nine months, and right now it’s like those delicious sushi are begging you to eat them right away – and obviously you can’t resist it.

“Ugh, sushi is overrated.” Christian scoffs.

—

Christian just came back from changing your baby’s diaper in the other room. He is holding your little bundle of joy in his arms – since he was just born, Christian has already become so protective of him he didn’t want the baby to ever leave his arms.

“Hush, C, no one needs to hear your trashy opinion.” You playfully clap back at his statement.

Your banter cracks Weston up. He cackles and you both do a high five.

“Ha-ha! Burn bro!”

Christian squints and shakes his head. He is more than happy to know that his best pal and his life partner are best friends, but sometimes when you two “gang up” on him – which happens really often, because you both love to make fun of Christian together – he would feel so outnumbered and get quite annoyed by it.

“Hmm, I’m not loving this dynamic, you know.” Christian says sarcastically.

“Oh boohoo, don’t be so bitter, white man.” Weston mocks him in response.

“Anyway, what’s up, new dad!?” Weston greets Christian then does the usual handshake with him – but since Christian is currently holding your baby, they do the one-hand version of the handshake.

“Happier than ever bro! I’m living the dream!” Christian gushes. 

“Aww, congratulations my brother!” Weston excitedly pats Christian’s back.

Christian gently supports the baby's head and back with his hands then slightly lifts the baby closer to his face.

“Here, we want you to meet our son, Finley Mark Pulisic. You can call him Finn for short.” Christian officially introducing your little man to his best buddy.

Weston is immediately in awe of Finn. His eyes were instantly locked on the face of the cutest little human he has ever seen.

“Wow, dude, he is so precious…” Weston murmurs. “You’re so lucky. man”

“Yeah, I know.” Christian replies.

His eyes are also very much set on Finn, admiring how adorable his little one truly is. For him, “lucky” is an understatement. He feels like he has hit the jackpot with the family life he’s now living, and would not want to change even the littlest thing.

Weston feels the urge to caress Finn’s little chubby cheeks with his finger, but he doesn't want to cross any boundaries so he asks for Christian’s permission before doing anything.

“May I feel his cheeks?”

“Yeah, of course.” Christian allows him to do so.

Weston gently caresses Finn’s cheeks and his heart suddenly feels like it is exploding.

“Oh my God, why is he this soft!? These fluffy cheeks are to die for! He is so cute!” Weston just blurts his thoughts out.

You – who is currently busy eating sushi that Weston brought for you on the bed – laugh when you hear what Weston said. It is clear to you that he has become Finn’s number one fan.

“What can I say, I did make one hell of a cute baby.” You chime in.

“We. We made a cute baby.” Christian jokingly corrects you.

You roll your eyes, blow a raspberry at him, then continue eating.

“Yeah, no, Finn’s cuteness is definitely all Y/N. Like, one hundred percent Y/N.”

Of course Weston is taking your side, he just wants to get into Christian’s nerve.

“Yea, yea, yea, whatever.” Christian mutters.

—

Christian’s arms get tired from carrying the baby for quite some time, so he puts Finn down on his crib next to your bed. At the same time, Weston feels like he is forgetting something, so he looks around and realizes he brought another takeout food for Christian. He quickly grabs the bag to hand it to Christian.

“Oh, Chris, I brought you some burritos,” Weston hands the other bag to Christian, “they are not from Chipotle, but you gotta eat, bro.”

Christian chortles.

“You don’t need to do that, but thanks a lot bro.”

“Anything for my favorite new parents.” Weston winks and funnily does the finger guns at us.

“You know what Chris? I just thought about this: now that you have a son, we’re like two and a half men. Like, you and I are the two and Finn is the half. How awesome is that?” Weston randomly tells Christian about this thought that crosses his mind.

You were listening to Weston’s random thoughts and already feeling left out – obviously you are not being serious – you voice your protest to him.

“Hey! What about me? Where am I fitting in on this scenario?”

“You will be the one who gave birth to the half man!” Weston laughs.

You’re confused as you don’t find that funny, but you think you should just play along.

“Eh,” you shrug, “whatever.”

“You two can raise Finn together then.” You acted upset.

“Y/N, please, don’t be mad…” Weston pretends to beg for your mercy.

“You and I both know anyone is better at parenting than Christian, right?”

“Come on guys,” Christian groans, “stop bullying me!”

—

taglist: @pulisicsgirl @neverinadream @swimmingismywholelife @chilwellspulisic @bracedes @lovelynikol16 @thoseboysinblue @lizzypotter14 @masonsrem @landoslover

[ivanzplaid]

I saw those praise headcanons and it reminded me of an idea I’ve been sitting on for awhile.

A male reader who brings up the idea of spanking to Lawrence Gordon, Peter Strahm, Patrick Bateman, and Bo Sinclair.

The readers kinda shy and nervous about it too. I’ve just been sitting on this brain rot for awhile and I wanted to share it.

-📼

LOVE YOU CASSETTE ANON YES OF COURSE. i love when yall share the brainrot with me because when i see these requests i literally jump with joy, share all ur thoughts with me i love this idea sm😭😭😭 these characters are perfect too because we have a nice mix between stern and classy to rough hungry and im literally screaming running around thinking about this THANK YOUUU. also im labeling this group as slashers even though all dont fall under the category, its just easier this way

my progress got deleted halfway thru bo's section so im so sorry if its sloppy i was just fedddd up w tumblr

requests are open, masterlist is up!!

Slashers x M!reader + Introducing Spanking | Headcanons

Warnings: nsfw undercut, dirty talk, man handling, praise & degradation, caring!lawrence & bo (but also some mean!dom! energy.. just how its gotta be), dom!slashers, sub!reader, punishments, we all expected mean!patrick lets be real here

Lawrence Gordon

lawrence loves to hear any ideas you have, he thinks its healthy to share new ideas and experiences with eachother. yet he also gets a slight suspicion that youre holding out on him the next time youre in the bedroom, he knows you well and can memorize your body language, so when he sees you avoiding eye contact and talking in a hushed or awkward manner, he wants to know whats going through your mind

he'll lay down and have your head on his chest while he plays/pats your hair, trying to ease you into saying it, snd is pleasantly surprised with your answer

"Tell me whats wrong darling, speak to me."

"I was thinking.. maybe we could, try something new? We don't have to do this if you don't want to, its fine, but, could we try spanking?"

his eyes meet yours and he sees how reluctant you were to telling him. as his hands find your chin, angling it up to meet his eyes, he smiles and says sure, whatever will give you a better experience is something hes willing to try

he thinks its funny how nervous you were, since hes open about a lot of things. hes a stern and classy dom, utilizing punishments and keeping himself composed a lot, he likes to see how youre such a mess when hes commanding over you, how his slight touch and gaze make you whimper

loves to see your vulnerability, he wants to see you exposed and at his will, he wants you to be vocal for him and show him how much you love it, it fuels his ego and reassures that he isnt doing anything wrong (because in the end hes still lawrence, and he cares about you more than his own life)

will mock you as he does it, it is a punishment after all. loves to see how obedient or defiant you are during and after, he likes to make you seem pathetic for your reactions

"What? Can't take it? Oh but handsome we just started.."

will have you count how many times he does it, he wants to hear your voice sputter and moan, it will get him hard and he will use it against you ( using it as an excuse to fuck you hard, saying that "he couldnt resist your lewd and obscene moans" )

loves to force you to look at him as he does it, he wants to see that pretty face of yours, whether you cry, whine, or try to hide your face

does that thing where every time you squirm or move on him, he chuckles darkly saying "Oh Baby, you're making it so hard for me to not hold you down right now.. and just show you some fucking manners.."

he is seconds away from making you cockwarm him as he laughs at your attempts to get off. he will overstimulate you by slowly stroking your dick and then going "ah-ah-ah.. you have to stay still, its still a punishment"

he loves to stroke or pat your hair as he spanks you, he loves to feel you flinch as he inflicts pain. after he does it, he'll rub your tender spots and say how well you took them, and how pretty you sounded as you did (or, if you were bratty, how depraved and pathetic of a sight you were)

he'll take such good care of you, giving you proper aftercare and everything, but for now, hes got you ass up, displayed nice and neat for him

Patrick Bateman

hes more than excited you are, as he is more into impact play/things along that line. he just loves to see how your body contorts to his advances and how his fingers just gently gliding across your ass make you whine, both from how tender it is and because his touch is so gentle you need it

he also thinks its hilarious that you were nervous about asking, because hes a pretty dominant/open man, hes into some kinky shit, and hes not afraid to talk about it.

he will mock you about being nervous, then taunt you with that fact, making the experience all the more exciting/intense, just as he'd prefer. he will rub your face softly and say how delicate and precious you look, and say that this for the better, then begin spanking you

"Darling-Darling.. don't cry now. I'm not even close to being finished."

his voice is always smooth and calm, which coupled with his confident exterior, is terrible for you. he will stroke you and play with your ass while he spanks you. putting a cockring around your dick if he knows youre getting too close to cumming when he spanks and teases you, he needs you to be ready for him after, when he has you gripping at the bedsheets while he fucks and degrades you

is honestly a slight menace when it comes to things like this, he'll talk you through the spanking snd make sure that youre whiny and rubbing up against him for more, he gets off by seeing the physical effects of his work, making him hard asl

"Good Boy.. thats right, take what I give you.."

likes for you to make eye contact, and will grip your chin just to face him so he can see your face give out a pathetic moan (may even take a photo.. just for safe keeping)

and he will be mean about that, asking if his personal slut couldnt take what he asked. in a mocking tone he'll say if he should go lighter next time, or if you like it hard since you moaned his name the entire time

will have you suck his dick after, because he thinks you enjoyed it too much, and if he did all that for you, he should get something in return. but dont worry, he'll guide you and say how your mouth was meant for his cock and his cock only, and how well you take him, especially after how sore you are

he notices you staying off/putting less pressure on your ass as you suck him off, and it makes him proud. the whole kink makes him proud, because hes happy to see his hand prints on you, knowing that his gorgeous boyfriend took it, and thanked him after for it, thats his art

i wouldnt be shocked if he had some handcuffs or toys.. he experiments and he pulls hoes so. but because of this, he may incorporate some bondage in and handcuff your wrists/ankles to the bedposts, having your stomach on the bed, and then deliver the spanking there.. he likes to see the cuffs rattle and your body shake

would obviously have you count as he spanks you, not because hes tryna be classy like lawrence, but because he knows you cant, and likes to hear your voice die out the moment he starts, and he will go on and on, having you count to the 10's, 20's, and if he thinks youve deserved it, 30's

"C'mon sweetheart.. don't stop counting. What number am I on?"

aftercare is exquisite, taking absth and applying some nice little lotion, just so he can abuse you the same the day after

Bo Sinclair

hes also a bit of a rough yet concerned man. he wants to try this out, because it lets out his sadistic side a bit more, but if he could get lost in the pleasure he gets from it, or, if he hears genuine pain from you, he gets anxious. he'd never want to actually hurt you, but if you give him the go ahead, he indulges in it. something about seeing you like prey under him makes him go nuts

is like an animal when he loses control, he will make you cry, he eants to see you beg for him to keep going (or for him to stop), he wants to see how much he can break you before your all fucked out beneath him

he lowkey likes having control and dominance over another guy, it really boosts his ego, definitely some uncovered trauma but either way, seeing you whimper from what he gives you gives him a massive hard on

will ask you teasing snd taunting questions just to get you to cry out and squirm. sayin something like "Are you likin' it doll? Or should I just stop and leave ya all needin' for me.."

please moan his name, because he will not only spank you harder, and rub where the tender spots are, but after he will lay down, have you sit on his dick and shove himself inside of you as hard as he can. hes gonna show you a reward you get for sayin his name all pretty like that

he loves to put you into doggy style and spank you as he fucks you, its his favorite thing for easy access

he also loves to objectify you, using nicknames like "pet, toy, doll, etc."

"Ah ah.. look at me, keep your eyes on me sweets. It's not that hard." he says this as he literally pounds the shit out of your ass, gripping your chin so that you cant look away

speaking of this, he loves to force you to look at him. he cannot get enough of it. he wants to see your every move, every way you contort, and every sound you make, because he needs your reactions

he wants you to touch snd to grab him while he spanks you. him imagining you gripping his thighs or having you sucking him off will result in a spank of encouragement, his little treat. he loves it, he wants to feel you on him

also loves overstimulation while spanking you.. find his hands wandering and stroking your dick, or massaging your ass while he spanks you to increase your pleasure

out of the bedroom he continues this behavior. if youre in his shop helping him, he'll tap your ass before squeezing it, loving how shocked you get at his roughness in public

"Theres my little pet.. takin' this spanking all too well.. almost like you want me to make your ass more tender than it is!"

loves to ask you rhetorical questions to tease and taunt you. he wants to see you get all worked up over his nothing, his voice lingering in your ears to belittle you. he'd ask "oh sweets.. was that too hard? would you want me to be nicer? cause that pathetic moan you let out tells me a different story.."

is all for having you be loud and proud with your cries, god knows he gets loud, whether its dirt talk, grunting, or even a deeper growl, he does it, so he wants to hesr all those pretty sounds you have for him

he really loves to have you beg for him, something about having you so needy that you cannot restrain yourself makes him lose it. he wants you to cry, whine, beg, or stutter his name and beg for whatever he'll give you. because after that, hes fucking you so hard jnto the bedsheets, having you grip onto them with no signs of stopping. and trust that every plead is another spank, with him going "oh.. my dirt little toy loves it when I use their body snd treat them like the pathetic slut they are?"

is all for rubbing your tender spots and seeing your body jump from the feel of his calloused fingers running over you. he sometimes intentionally slaps the same soot because he needs to hear that lewd moan come from your mouth that makes him so hard

Peter Strahm

now he is a very stressed pent up man, he doesnt have a lot of outlets, so when his boyfriend introduces the idea, he looks into it for a bit before acting on it, hes not a really kinky guy

however, once he figures everything out, hes all for it. he finds a way to express his frustration sexually, seeing you under him as he fucks into you, moaning for his touch, it is therapeutic for him

he loves how his rings add a bit of a sting when they spank you, he loves how the specific marks on them show up and how you whimper, and honestly he loves to hold you down when he does it

the control he finally feels is a much different type of control than what he has at work. this control is stress free, he doesnt feel like he has a weight on his shoulders from conditions or cases he isnt meeting. he feels totally, and indescribably in power, and it turns him on so much more

hes never really experimented with kinks before, so expect him to find a new type of bliss with this. hes going to be as into this as you are, stroking your cheek with his pointer finger as he pleases both you and him

is more into praise than degradation, loves to say how pretty and sweet his boyfriend is. "My good little boy is taking it so well.. you cant get enough of me."

really loves to have you facing towards a mirror while he does it, he wants to see your face and he wants you to see how you look. having his dick slide in and out of you, your moaning face unnable to form any sentences, seeing his hand come up, only to roughly come down on your ass while he says how perfect you look

wants the verbal affirmation of how good it feels, he gets off on how he knows that hes doing good, that you cant help but tell him how good it feels

"There he is.. thats my boy. Thats right, take it, youre doing so well."

wants to have his hands all over you when he fucks and spanks you. on your thighs, on your shoulders, on your hips, or even spreading your ass to get the perfect view for his work

this section is so short im so sorry but it literally got deleted after i SAVED it so i gave up a little😭

thinks the way that you squirm when he holds your hips down/chokes you is hot, he loves to feel you moving and struggling for more against him

[ebookporn]

What's Behind the Return of Bookstores?

Just when you thought that Amazon had finished off brick and mortar stores, booksellers are making a comeback. Yes, there's lots of available, low-cost, retail space. But the retail outlets are filling a bigger need.

by Howard Tullman

It looks like 30 years after the founding of Amazon and after decades of decline during which more than half the bookstores in the U.S. disappeared, we may actually be seeing a dramatic uptick in the opening of new bricks-and-mortar bookstores.

As a member of one of the last generations that will ever buy hardcover, non-fiction books (albeit primarily from Amazon), this is unexpected, exciting, and somewhat inexplicable news. I've insisted for many years that nothing would ever replace the sheer visceral joy of browsing a bookstore, the delight of happening upon new discoveries, and the efficiency of visually scanning dozens of stacks and shelves looking for new titles and those by familiar authors. One of the last great creative arts in advertising and marketing is the design and beauty of striking, surprising, and stirring book covers. Digital displays of any size filled with stamp-sized jpegs, tiny gifs, and banner ads can't compete.

I don't care how many different ways Amazon tries to present its massive inventory, there's simply no emotional connection or compelling comparison to seeing and holding the material up close and personal. Online book buying and paging thru endless screens reminds me of the painful and fatigued feeling you get these days when you search for something to watch on any of the streaming services and quickly become so overwhelmed by the sheer volume, clutter, and crap that when you finally make a selection, you're inclined to give up because you're now too tired to watch the thing. In fact, one of the worst aspects about the overwhelming flow of new books and the pressure to keep up with them is that it keeps us from reading so many of the older classics. 

READ MORE

[ruporas]

i wanted to give you some support to counteract the weird asks. and that is to say that... your comics and art hurt me in the best way. you really are *the* trigun artist for me. you give the characters such humanity and softness. i think you're the reason trigun occupies my brain so much, and why i'm reading through trimax.

your characterization is perfect. and it's wolfwood who i'm really a sucker for. the desire to protect him, knowing how unfair his life has been, maybe even knowing what happens to him as well. he has his gruff and blunt personality but its the way he's truly a sweetheart deep down, with those he loves, and not only that, but he would continue to protect others, before himself, despite everything.

...i really love how you do angst. neither of these idiots (affectionate) would admit to anything being wrong with them, and yet you manage to beautifully portray the weights they carry. if not through tension in their relationship, then physically (scars and memories; or dark circles under eyes. "can't talk about it" might be one of my favorite works of yours) um... basically, i hope you keep up the good work, and keep making things that you love and are passionate about. don't let the opinions of others stop you. the world needs your art and your voice. i love reading your tags and everything you do. ...and i hope you are taking care of yourself, irl. you are loved. <3 thank you.

T___T THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL OF YOUR KIND WORDS WAHHH... i didn't mind the previous asks at all, but it really means a lot to see this kind of support and i'm happy to know my art can push that desire to read maximum!!! sincerely, one of my top goals is to just push for that, so thank you for including that detail <3

and wolfwood is absolutely my favorite character so i'm happy to know my characterization for him is good... that sentence of him continuing to protect others first instead of himself is just, :") yeah,. for his entire life basically, he's taken care of other people and if not for the eom, he could've had a gentler life of doing just that, taking care of others without the bloodshed. he is such a sweet character, it's forever painful remembering what he's endured.

and gahh thank you so much for enjoying my work and for reading my comics in general..!!! vw is the rep ever for unspoken love so i have a lot of fun exploring the different avenues that could lead to, many parts of it tends to be sad and bittersweet, but only because they love the other so much.

genuinely, thank you for all of this!! i will keep making art for as long as i can, for myself and for everyone who's willing to stop by. this kind of support is always incredibly encouraging, i really don't know how to express it properly in words, but just know i read them over like 20 times before i can even reply bc i need to digest it and explode with joy dgmkdsmgg BUT THANK YOU FOR TAKING THE TIME TO SEND THIS AND FOR YOUR SUPPORT!!! have this small doodle of two very exhausted guys, they are getting thru the horrors together

[minophus]

Can we get the Gabe helmet and how he is with kids ramble op. Please I'm begging I love your version of Gabriel so much I need to be friends with him. Maybe even drink a cup of tea with a little biscuit. Maybe he'd even be so kind to tell me stories about angel society and history,,

Yesss

I think a while after the council was put into power, for higher angels, the helmets were mandated. As an exercise of that power and to enforce conformity with their idea of perfection.

Gabriel was lucky in that he kept the hinge of his topandbottom jaw Mobile (with enough effort and pain.) but a lot of other supreme angels+councilors were not as lucky(example: oc abraham. the gold accents of his helm leave him Completely sealed. he will never open his mouth again).

Like i said it is very painful and tedious to get his mouth open. Painful mostly because the helm is like, embedded into his jaw? and his skin has grown into it so tightly it'd be like trying to rip the shell from a turtle. its just that he'd survive. I like to picture it requiring so much effort he has to use both his hands+mental and physical willpower at once to pry it open. There'd be a lot of blood. There'd be so much blood. So much. So much. I like to envision it as some sort of metaphor for freeing himself + self discovery.

Him w kids, oh he loves kids. He's a busy guy but he is a people person and he loves to talk and play. Yes he knows his way with a sword like the back of his hand, but hes very good at pretend. he loves to give piggyback rides. he is always open to giving a hug to any child that might not be having the best day.

In heaven, consolation through forgiving of mistakes thru the Lord and emotional support through their holy scripture is only standard. He doesn't offer much more than this but it still does mean a lot from Archangel Gabriel. An angel of such high status going out of his way to support a young one. after the disappearance of god and no angels being further created & young ones growing into their roles he'd miss playing and talking with kids. Always gave him such a joy

[whumpshaped]

LMAO YOUR OPINION SO TRUE, I've seen people write whumpees getting tortured and assaulted and mutilated and starved and beaten every day for literal years and they still have them acting like it didn't traumatize them 😂 "no they're just really strong sorry I don't like PATHETIC WEAK whumpees who *checks notes* act like an actual human would upon being tortured and get trauma, what's trauma lol? Not real. Now move along, it's time for him make jokes about his 3rd anniversary of pethood"

to be very very clear i am absolutely not saying ppl writing defiant or "unrealistic" whumpees r bad writers or their stories r bad or anything, its just not my personal taste. like, ive seen ppl be like "ugh pathetic broken whumpees are so boring" and that already triggers my rsd so i wanna be clear that i am NOT trying to put anyone down at all, please write what brings u the most joy, because there will be plenty plenty others who love that same thing.

this got long bc im rambling im sorry

but yes what u describe is absolutely my pet peeve, for the sole reason that my own personality is soooooo far away from that that i cant project lol actually, i wonder if it rly is unrealistic, or if there are ppl who have such a strong detachment from their situation that theyd continue to act that way. or even just... you know how people can get used to everything. and how with chronic pain for example, the pain gets "boring" and you wont see those ppl just rolling around the floor in agony 24/7 bc thats not very fun. they just learn to function w pain levels potentially much higher than average. i wonder if a whumpee whos been in captivity for 3 yrs could have a similar situation where theyre just tired of being scared and they have no joys other than making whumper's eye twich. (and only break down after the stressors and repeated trauma are gone)

i think my whumpees swing the other way on the unrealism spectrum (or maybe not idk ive never been thru that and fingers crossed i never will) and im sure thats also annoying for some people. but if u know me, u know i am obsessed w rules and order. breaking rules of any kind gives me immense anxiety. i also hate unfair treatment to death! so if i see a whumpee break rules and succeed and thats how they gain advantages, it pisses me off! bc they just broke the rules why r they getting better treatment!! even if they get worse treatment im just huffing and puffing bc well u couldve avoided that!! i wouldve!!

another reason is that if whumpee is successfully defiant and pissing whumper off or smth, getting under their skin, whatever, it takes me out of the whumper fantasy... if u saw me describe my ideal whumper u saw how i literally wrote mary sue. that includes being able to control and break their whumpee. if whumpee isnt following the rules it makes me question the whumper, and i dont like questioning the whumper, i want the whumper to be in absolute and utter control of everything.

BUT AGAIN THATS ALL PERSONAL OPINION. thats what i like, thats what i write, thats what i seek out from others. i hope others have a very fun time writing as defiant whumpees as their heart desires.

[bosskie]

Family Drama

I felt like drawing something silly to amuse myself since I have been feeling quite awful lately... So, I got inspired by one of those unreleased Slig news related to Molluck's trial, having Molluck and his mother, Lady Margaret, about to have a face off with boxing gloves.

Frankly, it has bothered me how badly I did draw her last time, at least in my opinion, so I liked to try it again too. Still not sure how her head should be drawn but I'm trying my best.

I really don't know if I should write this stuff or not... But well, I tend to spend like all my time alone with my thoughts... I have just been thinking that how difficult for me it is to see me having any skill/talent... How difficult for me is to feel like I 'deserve' any love... During my worst moments I can wish that everyone hated me so I was perished, erased from this world... But at the same time, one side of me wishes to be loved... It just made me cry when I looked at my newest self-insert sketch a moment ago, how loving Molluck seemed... I'm just only able to give love to myself thru him...

It's still just so difficult to see myself having future... I feel like I have already failed in life way too badly... I just keep having doubts, feel like no one probably wants me, to be with me, pay for my work etc... Even when it's said that I did great job, I just doubt it... It's driving me crazy... I just cannot even enjoy my 'achievements' when I feel like they were just luck or mere 'lucky mistakes'... I just don't believe in myself.

I'm not even sure if I'm healing well enough or at all actually when giving up has felt more tempting now... I just see no reasons to fight anymore, life makes zero sense to me... In my mind, I still see Molluck looking at me and telling me beautiful things, loving me... I don't know if I'm just crazy/nuts, to keep living just for a fictional character, when my mind just tells me so intensely to leave the real people, how I'm just wasting their time, resources, even love... Molluck ain't real, so I cannot really waste his time 'n' stuff, and that's why my mind accepts him better than real people.

I just live with mental pain every day, for some other reasons too I'm not telling. It's draining me, been living with it for over a decade... Back then, I thought that I wouldn't be even alive to this day but here I am, for whatever reason. I just don't know how to achieve happiness, haven't felt such a thing for so long, haven't been able to enjoy my life this whole time... My life is good, I have basically gotten all I have wanted but still, I feel so depressed, thinking that I don't deserve this all, that it would be better for everyone that I never even existed or that someone else was born instead of me... I'm just unable to see how I bring joy to the others, unable to feel loved... I never remember feeling such a thing, even as a child, even I have gotten so much love... It just makes me feel like there is something wrong with me, that I'm broken, too broken... I only know that I'm loved but why I cannot feel it... I only remember a few moments when I have been able to feel such a thing, or at least one, but it was me feeling like how Molluck loves me...

Man, why must my mind be like this... Well, I keep watching the show of my life... At least I have found some happiness when I found Molluck since he is the character I have been looking for all these years, he is the one that feels like the right one. Though, yes, it does also depress me that he is just fictional but well, technology can help me! Gotta just get rich so that I can only just be and live in my virtual world... Yeah, that's the only way to 'live' with him... Man, I don't know what I'm doing with my life, so I'm just wasting it on Molluck... I just don't really feel like doing anything with my life, so yeah, Molluck is fine.

Yeah, this Gluk just means so much to me... I have already heard so many times that I'm odd, so gotta just embrace the odd!

[thecolorsfucked]

i think the reason i got called a nomad for chronic homelessness why im seen as my health is failing not just chronically fucked up and exacerbated by my mental illness the reason im seen as not an orphan or without support despite not seeing or speaking to my mom in 17 years and barely knowing my father(hes more of a distant manipulative uncle that eventually met me as an adult) is because

like many other ppl with Shit Life Syndrome

i adapted to it all

it bugs me it hurts me its hard it's unbearable but i cant like stop? so i adapted i sucked it up i sprinkle hints of pain bcuz with Shit Life Syndrome no individual can fix it so u dont dump everything on ppl itll hurt them more than it could help u

i adapted and decided if my life is going to be hell i am going to get whatever joy and fun and experience i can strangle out of it and sometimes that involves rash impulsive and not always responsible decisions

and it makes me look like i kinda want it this way

and i dont and i think this happens to ppl who accept life is shit but decide to enjoy what we can we look like its some kind of lifestyle choice and not systemic oppression that we are surviving thru