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OOO I’m so happy to see some new doodles of Long Min and Lu Zhen TT^TT
Smth about them just makes me wanna giggle and kick my feet
dslkofdjfolkj Anon ;______; ANOOOOON....!! You have single-handedly boosted our confidence in our work like 200% ifudhdioguh
Thank you ;____;ojndoidfnoimfndosd here's a doodle
#my art#sketchy sketch#my oc#original character#answering stuff#iusho<iosdfjh#sdoijfoijsdfoijsd#doifjsofij we freaked out on discord instantly dsoihsio#there might be little text snippets soon in the future#oidsjoifjdsoifj#pllllrlrhhrh anon likes our silly OCs ;_____;#Long Mins eyes work in fantasy cat eye logic: him happy etc his pupils get bigger#why because its cute shh no it doesnt make sense shhhhh
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Some answers to some of the questions I've gotten lately <3
Hii! I don't think there is one word that makes me happier to read in combination with my game than *immersive* — Thank you <3
I have sort of on purpose avoided face claims, and not advertised the art I've made because I really want the character to look how people want. If other people send me face claims I could post them and we could see if we all think similarly 😅
The two remaining ROs main (physically) defining qualities are,
A: gold coloring, meaning eyes are something between (hazel/warm golden brown/amber/) and the hair has some natural highlights that shine in a golden shade / shines in bright light (so hair is between: dark-blonde/red/warm brown/ + freckles). I have in my notes that they move like a cat... And they are considered very attractive in the 1800s.
I'm sure i've described them in more detail somewhere, but I couldn't find it right now.
H: Deep/dark/vibrant green eyes. They speak softly, but with authority. Great posture. Hamish is tall, Helena is short. Classical ideal gentleman/gentlewoman.
Important clarification
Ahh, yes—okay. I want to clarify this. The options with (<3) are not the only romantic options! There are sooo many romantic options. But the hearts are sometimes there to signify a difference from a similar platonic choice or if I think it is unclear in the choice text.
You can totally play many different types of sherlocks /flirts and still land a romance option! The (<3) is only a small part of the romance options!
And, also, the first choice with Watson in chapter 2 is only to set the MC's relation with Watson. It does not lock-in or -out a platonic or romantic relationship. It's just how Sherlock feels and have treated Watson in the past. The only way to lock out a romance with Watson (so far) is to choose the option in the character creator.
Hahah <3 Love this <3 There is no reason to choose just yet! (I would love to do a poll to see who's the favorite now, hmm...)
<3 <3 <3 I love you!
Hahaha I'm really glad to hear it <3 There are a few little code snippets hidden in the code, I'm really glad to hear that one was appreciated <3
<3 There will be more bird moments in the next chapter! <3
Hiii! <3<3<3 You can fight quite a lot—there are two choices that lower romance points with Lestrade, but it's not too much. If I can get some of my twine ideas to work you will definitely be able to have a dynamic relations shift that can change through out the chapters and then have it reacted upon. Stuff like " You don't argue with me anymore?" Or " You've never been *kind* before..."
Thank you so much @llamagirl28 <3
I was soooo close to writing it haha—but it was too early!!! We have to wait a little longer for such moments <3
Hahah Now it's in my head too! (Loki is Lestrade right? And thor is MC? :0 )
<3 If you choose what I call the "tsundere" MC option Watson will (mostly) be able to figure it out. They find it cute. But there might be future moments—especially when it comes to important romantic questions where it might complicate matters. Things like "Do they really like me?? Or am I fooling myself?" might be increased playing a tsundere MC (but also a very shy MC that doesn't show how they feel or a very flirty MC that flirts with everyone...)
I'm definitely taking a rest now :'D
Ohhh man I ran out of allowed pictures haha. I'll copy the text on the rest!
CHAPTER 2!!! I have no words and too many words, simultaneously. I love Watson so much!! But nothing can dethrone my love for Lestrade, sorry. Love triangle when???
<3 I think such scenes could appear as soon as chapter 7 when all the ROs are in the same place :)
Hgehrgrgeg I'm absolutely in love with the new chapter its so good!! This is jusy my initial reaction (aka me screaming) because i cant form intelligent thoughts rn ❤ Oh also, Jane Watson marry me challenge 💍
Jane H Watson is now yours <3 take care of them!
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Spilled Pearls
- Chapter 19 - ao3 -
Time passed, as it had a tendency to do.
After Cangse Sanren left, Lan Qiren remained in seclusion for the next two months, reviewing texts on the Lan sect rules regarding reciprocation, filial respect, and loyalty, and occasionally playing some new pieces – he’d started composing music as well as simply learning it, and that was a finicky business. Not only did he need to worry about the musical composition itself, like any normal musician, but there was also interweaving the spiritual energies and figuring out the way the song could be used as a spell, which was a completely different and often completely contradictory set of rules.
Moreover, the most powerful song-spells, he knew, were the ones that incorporated and drew on emotion, and he’d always had difficulty with those. Like most of his clan, Lan Qiren cleaved towards the more intellectual melodies, difficult but cold and distant, yet if he wanted to be truly innovative, he would need to find melodies in his heart.
Not long before he went to the Nightless City he had been inspired in a dream with a half-snippet of sound, which he had been painstakingly building up into a song in fits and starts, but recently he had found that whenever he played it the only image that came to mind was that of pearls scattered amidst blood-red mud.
The song was good, though, although it felt unfinished and incomplete. After he emerged from seclusion, he played it for his music teacher, first without qi and then with, demonstrating the suffocating and asphyxiating feeling of it – a heavy stone sitting in the midst of his chest, all his misery and anxieties wrapped up into musical notes – and his music teacher had been thrilled.
“You were born to write tragedies, child,” he said, examining the score proudly. “This is not only good but innovative, a new style with unexpected effects. I look forward to seeing you refine this further, and to your future works.”
Lan Qiren saluted deeply.
Music was just about the only thing that was going right for him at the moment.
The other disciples had been lured back into gossip by his presence, consumed by curiosity, and the teachers had come down on it hard, breeding resentment; even his few friends had been made tired by the whole fuss and only wanted it to die down. The rumors went by swiftly and quickly, anything to do with the Wen sect or the Nightless City almost immediately spread around everywhere, reaching his ears almost immediately upon his exit from seclusion.
One in particular caused him alarm, suggesting that Madame Wen had been discarded or even killed immediately after successfully bearing a son to her husband, but Lan Yueheng had convinced Lan Ganhui, always good at making friends, to write to the Wen sect disciples he’d become friendly with in the Nightless City to find out the truth. In the end, it turned out that Wen Ruohan had merely grown more distant from her, instructing her to go into seclusion for the birth a little early, and had perhaps sarcastically sent her a few treatises on the subject of a wife’s duty to support her husband. In the end, Wen Ruohan was an ambitious and ruthless man who encouraged his sect to take him as his model - as he himself had remarked, Madame Wen’s viciousness in fact demonstrated how she was an excellent match for him.
Lan Qiren hated that he was relieved that Wen Ruohan had not taken out his rage at what had happened on his wife, who had instigated the incident. He hated even more his suspicions that Wen Ruohan might have refrained from doing so not out of morality but out of the thought that Lan Qiren himself might disapprove - he wasn’t sure if that thought made him happy or sad.
At any rate, he soon didn’t have time to worry about things like that.
Lan Qiren’s refusal to explain in any detail what had happened at the Nightless City that had sent him fleeing and retreating into seclusion was largely not accepted by his curious peers, especially when someone had jeeringly pointed out that he’d probably told Cangse Sanren the whole thing already, and he refused to go to his teachers to complain, as he had in his youth.
His brother hadn’t accepted it, either.
He’d given Lan Qiren ten days after exiting seclusion, clearly expecting him to come and report on what had happened. When Lan Qiren had not done so, he had finally grown impatient and found him, demanding to know what it was that he had done that had caused such a fuss.
Lan Qiren had knelt and declared that he was unfilial and disobedient, that he had broken the rules, and requested that his brother punish him for his wrongdoing.
His brother had stared at him for a long time before realizing that Lan Qiren was serious – that he would rather be punished for intentionally breaking the rules against honoring and obeying his elders than tell what he had done or what had happened. Even when he was dragged to the hanshI, his collar pulled tight in his brother’s fist until he was thrown down to kneel in front of their father the sect leader, Lan Qiren did not object; he knelt without complaint, and even pressed his forehead to the ground in deference, but he did not speak.
The punishment his father decided upon for him was harsh, but Lan Qiren accepted it willingly. By the rules of his sect, an accepted punishment expiated a breach of the rules; once punished, he could no longer be persecuted for what he had done to earn the punishment. It would be over and done with.
Of course, there were always ways around that.
Technically, Lan Qiren’s breach was not in refusing to tell what had happened, but in disrespecting his elders by so refusing. A few days after he recovered from his initial punishment, his brother, still furious at having been denied, asked him the same question, with the same result. Their father looked disapprovingly at his eldest son – deliberately exploiting loopholes was not good etiquette – but again imposed a punishment.
Lan Qiren gritted his teeth and endured.
Lan Qiren’s brother did not bother him a third time, but by then it was too late; their relationship continued to deteriorate. Lan Qiren sought to avoid his brother whenever possible, and his brother’s disappointment in him grew; although he did not explicitly complain or impose punishments directly, he made his views clear. Those disciples and teachers that most admired him were, as always, more than willing to follow his lead and fill in the gaps, and for one reason or another Lan Qiren spent more time in the discipline hall than ever before.
Eventually, noticing the division, others in the sect sought to reconcile them – their teachers, in the most part – but Lan Qiren rebuffed them, having noticed that their requests to be more considerate and free-minded were always aimed at him and never to his brother.
After poor Lan Yueheng, who never cared about anything but his alchemy and his mathematics and, possibly, the particularly indulgent outer-sect female disciple that guarded the stockroom of the ingredients he used to make things explode and regularly looked the other way when he came to get an extra helping, got roped into trying to tell Lan Qiren to be more forgiving, citing rules about fighting within families leading to nothing with a miserable and bemused expression on his face, Lan Qiren went to the teacher in question and rather acidly pointed out the discrepancy.
“He’s your elder,” the teacher said.
“Do not disrespect the younger,” Lan Qiren retorted.
“He’s your family –”
“Am I not his?”
The teacher sighed. “It’s not the same, with him. You know how he is – how he’s always been.”
Lan Qiren knew. Still, he said, “If you can identify where my conduct does not live up to the rules, please do so, and I will consider if my conduct requires modification. At the moment, I do not.”
“Qiren…”
“Why must I always be the one to yield?” Lan Qiren demanded. “I didn’t answer one question, and I took the punishment for it, as was my right. He is the one who is insisting on making a fuss, not me – why come to me? I don’t want anything from him.”
“That’s the problem. You shouldn’t fight so – why this, why now? You’ve always yielded to him before.”
Lan Qiren said nothing.
“He’s still your elder brother, Qiren. Soon, he’ll be your sect leader.”
“Do not fear the strong; do not bully the weak,” Lan Qiren said. “Being sect leader makes him more responsible, not less.”
“Qiren –”
“I have been a good brother to him for nearly twenty years, honored teacher. Perhaps not the most promising, perhaps somewhat embarrassing, but devoted in my own way. I have not changed so much. I am still loyal, still filial; I still do all that I am asked…the only thing that changed is that I expect nothing from him.”
Not even his love.
Lan Qiren knew better, now. He’d seen what a brother could be, what it should be - he’d experienced, however fleetingly, having someone genuinely care for him, listen to him and indulge him and take joy in his company; no longer would he accept his brother’s barely concealed disdain as an adequate substitute.
“Qiren –”
“Has my father said anything?”
His teacher fell silent.
Lan Qiren bowed his head, having expected nothing better. His father was growing more and more distant from the world, less and less interested in the minutiae of everyday life; he could still stir himself to care for his precious eldest son, the child of his heart, but his oft-forgotten and overlooked second?
Unless Lan Qiren’s brother had complained about him, his father was unlikely to remember that such a person as Lan Qiren even existed.
“Does father hate me?” he asked, emboldened by his misery. It was the question he had always wanted to ask and had never dared to, and his teacher flinched as if struck. “Is that why he never saw me?”
“No,” his teacher said. “No – it wasn’t…”
“Does he blame me for my mother’s death?”
“He blames himself,” his teacher said, and sounded tired unto death. “From the very first. He thought that if he had not been sect leader, they might not have lost their children; if he was not sect leader, it wouldn’t have mattered if they’d had only one child left. But he couldn’t blame the sect, so he blamed himself – you don’t know how bad it was, Qiren; you don’t know what we all went through back then. When your mother died, he even lost his mind for a time.”
“What does that have to do with me?” Lan Qiren demanded. His hands had clenched into fists at some point, his knuckles pale and white. “If he blames himself and not me, then why did he – he never –”
He barely even saw me, he wanted to say. I am his son, just like my brother, yet it’s as if I don’t exist.
Why couldn’t he love me, too?
“You were very young,” his teacher said, his voice suddenly very distant as if he were remembering something. Lan Qiren looked at him in surprise. “I shouldn’t tell you this, but...she had just died, and he had lost his mind; none of us had realized the extent to it, thinking it merely grief. You were young, you didn’t understand. You ran to him, seeking comfort, and he nearly – he couldn’t risk having such a sin on his conscience, Qiren. You should not blame him.”
“What are you saying? That he neglected me and held me at arms’ length to console himself for nearly murdering me?” Lan Qiren asked, and thought back to all the times he had found himself afraid of his father’s glacial voice, terrified for no reason. If his father had tried to kill him in a rage, as his teacher suggested, shouldn’t he have been more scared of the heat than of cold?
Unless - his brilliant and accomplished father, who always acted as the rules said he should but who had lost his heart along with his wife - unless he had knowingly -
Perhaps it had been the sect that had ordered their separation, not his father. Perhaps his father, who had spent years going through the motions of leadership and caring only about the son that reminded him of his wife’s joy and not the one who reminded him only of her death - his father, who led their sect and raised his eldest son and in so doing taught them all to be like him, overly partial to favorites and overly harsh to those that did not meet expectations - perhaps he had not objected to that arrangements. Perhaps it had been the elders that had set the rule of meeting only once a month, rather than not at all.
Perhaps they had thought that it had been for Lan Qiren’s own good that they had done so.
Perhaps they thought it was for his own good that they encouraged him to yield now to his brother’s temper, to humble himself despite having done nothing wrong, and all for the sake of familial peace.
That was not the conduct mandated by his family’s rules. Not the ones he followed, anyway.
It’s his fault, Lan Qiren thought suddenly. He saw the path we were walking down, my brother and I, and he did nothing to stop it; he loved my brother too much and me too little, and ruined us both through his negligence and indifference. He made my brother think he deserved the world that he then had to hold up on his own, while he made me think I deserved nothing...he could have done better by us. He should have done better by us.
Finding that his teacher had run out of things to say, Lan Qiren saluted him once again.
“I will be filial and loyal, as the rules require,” he said simply. “I will respect and honor my father and brother. Do not doubt that.”
He said no more. Instead, he returned to his quarters, wondering if they thought he was happy about how things stood between him and his brother, who he still loved.
Nothing could be further from the truth.
He thought miserably to himself that he had been happier living in denial, pretending to himself that there was brotherly affection between them, that his brother’s coldness was only because Lan Qiren had spoiled things somehow by being inferior than his brother would have preferred. When he could love his brother whole-heartedly and think to himself that his brother secretly loved him back, when he suspected but did not know that that had only ever been a lie he had concocted for himself. He had been far happier back then than the way it was now, when even the paper-thin one-sided façade of love was gone.
The saddest part of it all was that Lan Qiren still loved his brother, his stupid Lan heart as inexorable as a mountain avalanche already set in motion. He just didn’t much like him.
He did like Wen Ruohan, the brother that liked him back and might even have loved him if a man such as him could recognize such a tender emotion, but that wasn’t really relevant.
Lan Qiren knew his duty, whether to his sect, to his brothers, or to morality. He knew what he had to do.
For his part, Wen Ruohan waited over a month and a half after Lan Qiren’s exit from seclusion before trying to reach out again by mail. No doubt conscious of his dignity and ego, the powerful sect leader that no one ever really denied, his letter talked around the subject in Wen Ruohan’s usual high-handed manner and evaded either apologies or explanations; from his tone, it was likely that he expected Lan Qiren to respond in anger and denial, or even not to respond at all. Instead, Lan Qiren wrote back obediently, reporting dully on his daily life. When pressed, he even wrote a short summary of his ongoing projects, copying the words precisely from the submissions he made for his teachers to avoid excessive enthusiasm.
Wen Ruohan’s letters developed a certain level of concern after that, which Lan Qiren ignored in favor of continuing to respond politely but unenthusiastically; a filial younger brother, just as he was to his own blood brother, and nothing more. At the next discussion conference, he saluted Wen Ruohan to the exact degree required by their relationship and called him xiongzhang as a respectful younger brother ought; Wen Ruohan had an expression on his face that suggested he had bitten into a sour lemon and stepped in dog shit at the same time, and his eyes followed Lan Qiren around for the remainder of the afternoon.
Lan Qiren was concerned for a while that Wen Ruohan would try to summon him once night fell, forcing the issue, but he was saved through an unexpected twist of fate – namely, that Jiang Fengmian had, like all the others, completely misinterpreted Lan Qiren’s relationship with Cangse Sanren. The Jiang sect heir marched up to him not long after the opening ceremonies had been completed and asked him, stiffly, to swear that he had no interest in the lady and would not communicate with her in the future. Lan Qiren, thinking primarily of their friendship, refused, and then Jiang Fengmian punched him right in the face.
Lan Qiren might be cold and standoffish as a rule, but he did have a temper, and that temper did not hold with being assaulted over things that weren’t even his fault – neither of them were even involved with Cangse Sanren! – and having been so thoroughly goaded he had no choice but to hit back.
In the end, Cangse Sanren had slapped Jiang Fengmian silly and Lan Qiren’s brother had sent him to kneel in disgrace all night, reminding him no fighting without permission and with his eyes silently promised additional punishment when they returned home.
Wen Ruohan didn’t disturb him that night, and Lan Qiren was able to persevere. Indeed, Wen Ruohan troubled him much less than he’d feared, opting in his hurt pride to instead turn to Lao Nie and stay remarkably close by his side – Lao Nie was the one who looked apologetically at Lan Qiren and tried to find time for him, whether to invite him on outings or to scold his brother for the apparent breakdown in domestic tranquility. For his part, Lan Qiren ignored Lao Nie and didn’t hold it against him even when he started showing up to the discussion meetings with distinctive red marks on his throat.
All right, he held it against him a little.
How Lao Nie had such bad taste, Lan Qiren had no idea. Surely he, unlike Lan Qiren, had known enough to realize that Wen Ruohan was an evil man…?
Probably he had; it was only that he didn’t much care. Lan Qiren had promised to try to stop lying to himself about people he liked, and that meant he couldn’t pretend that Lao Nie wasn’t a remarkably callous man at times, ruthless and careless with anything that was outside his sect – even his friends. There could be no doubt that he loved them, sincerely and honestly, and yet…
Lan Qiren was a little disappointed, but not much, knowing that he, too, was irrevocably bound to such a man as Wen Ruohan. He couldn’t blame Lao Nie for the same thing he himself had done.
Mostly he was just pleased that his suspicion regarding their relationship had been confirmed, even if somehow – unbelievably – no one else seemed to notice it.
In fact, he thought it might mark the very first time in his life that he’d figured out something interpersonal before other people had. Normally he would report it to someone at his sect as soon as he noticed that they’d overlooked it, wanting to do his best for them, but the sensation was too novel and his relations with his sect a little too cold at the moment; he hugged the knowledge to his chest instead, enjoying the brief warm feeling of knowing something other people didn’t.
He intended to tell them, of course, once they returned back to the Cloud Recesses, only they had barely brushed the dust of their journey off their shoulders when they were summoned to the gathering hall for what everyone had now expected for years: Lan Qiren’s father, eyes blank, made the announcement that he was officially setting the date for which he would be retiring as sect leader and retreating from the world, going into seclusion to try to break through the boundaries of cultivation and reach the heavens in a single bound or else die in the attempt.
Lan Qiren’s brother, naturally, would inherit.
He was as fresh from the road as the rest of them, but with his hands behind his back, standing beside their father, he looked as fresh and untouched as a new-bloomed orchid, as beautiful as a polished piece of jade. His eyes reflected the dichotomy that Lan Qiren had learned governed his brother’s life: pride, for the power that he was going to inherit and the accomplishments that everyone agreed made him worthy of that inheritance, and envy, looking at his own father with jealousy, longing also to withdraw from the weight the world had placed on him and do what he could on his own, unburdened by others.
Lan Qiren’s brother, Lan Qiren had learned, saw everything in his life through the prism of himself – did others have something he wanted, did he have something that they didn’t, how did he compare, was he being compared…when he got something into his mind, he cared for nothing else but how to achieve it, no matter the cost, and most of the time he was successful, too. He was fundamentally self-sufficient, requiring nothing and no one but himself, and so was capable of performing miracles – if he was motivated to do so.
Lan Qiren was much less capable. He was lacking in cultivation, lacking in social skills, lacking even in a similar degree of independence, longing as he did for the company and acceptance of his peers even as his introversion demanded sufficient time to himself. There was no way in which he was superior to his brother; in every respect, he was inferior.
And yet, sometimes, he thought that his brother was jealous of him, too.
(Their father retreating into seclusion meant that they would both be losing him – but it was really only Lan Qiren’s brother that lost something. For Lan Qiren, what he mourned was only the absence of what had never been there, and he had finished mourning for that already.)
In the end, the main change occasioned by the impending change in leadership was that Lan Qiren’s brother grew too busy to pay much attention to Lan Qiren, much to his relief. Relations between them grew…not warmer, no, but less fraught, and although Lan Qiren knew he ought to celebrate, he mostly mourned that the cause of it was not a real mending of fences but rather his brother simply forgetting that he existed, just as their father always had.
Lan Qiren took the first opportunity he had to get out of the Cloud Recesses, even attending a party to celebrate sworn brother’s new son with relatively little issue. During the visit, Wen Ruohan ignored him in favor of sticking ever closer to a strangely distracted Lao Nie, almost as if he were deliberately slighting Lan Qiren for having been cold in their last interaction and for not answering his letters the way he wanted. Lan Qiren briefly felt hurt at having been put aside and forgotten so quickly - assuming that he had been forgotten, which he wasn’t sure of, as Wen Ruohan ignoring him sometimes seemed almost performative - but then reminded himself that this, like his poor relationship with his blood brother, was only the results of his own actions, and those of others.
He didn’t – regret it, not really. He’d lived his life by the Lan sect rules, and he didn’t regret doing so now, no matter how lonely the results might make him feel.
Instead, he returned to the Cloud Recesses and began to plan out in earnest his plans for departing the Cloud Recesses to travel the world as a musician, the goal he had set since he was young and was finally, impossibly, on the verge of satisfying. He would need to stay for his brother’s ascension to sect leader the next year, he thought, and perhaps for a year after that – just because their relationship wasn’t good didn’t mean he was entitled to do things that would let other people talk about it – but after that…
After that, he would go.
He would make new friends, or not. He would learn new things. He would see what the world was like.
Sooner than he thought, Lan Qiren turned twenty, thereby finally becoming an adult. The event took place with little fanfare, and Lan Qiren sent back the gifts he received from both Wen Ruohan and Lao Nie unopened with a polite note indicating that he was unworthy of such attention, and Cangse Sanren’s with a much more emphatic note reminding her that he was largely uninterested in sexual matters and therefore had no need for these sorts of implements.
His brother got him new guqin strings, the same gift he always gave – Lan Qiren had once been very happy to receive it before he realized that it was the storeroom distributing the gift in his brother’s name – and Lan Qiren returned that as well. Lan Yueheng was the only one who successfully managed to give him a gift by virtue of sneaking the fancy brush he’d bought for him into his table in such a way that Lan Qiren utilized it before realizing it was new, and then refused to take it back on the basis that it had already been used. He looked so pleased with himself over his little trick that Lan Qiren didn’t have the heart to scold him.
Time continued to pass: day by day, night by night, season by season.
And then she arrived.
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False Confidence - Chapter Ten
I had to cut the real chapter in two because it was way too long, than managed to make it just as long as it was before again. So I'm sorry for the long read 😂 There's also gonna be an 11th chapter, which is the last planned one. There might be bonus chapters or little snippets of their future, but I'm not sure yet 😊 Hope you guys will enjoy this one and have a great evening 🧡
Inspiration song
Masterlist | Taglist/Queue | Request
Chapter Nine | You’re here | Chapter Eleven
The heartbreak of Bahrain was soon followed by Lewis testing positive for Covid and everyone running around like headless chickens, trying to sort everything out. Seeing George in Mercedes clothing a few days later was still strange, even though all of us knew it was coming the moment Lewis had to step aside. It felt natural but strange at the same time, whenever we crossed paths in the paddock and my eyes were searching for the Williams shirt whenever he was standing next to Nicky and Jack.
That strange feeling followed us right into the weekend, sticking to every step we took. It didn’t help that I still felt uncomfortable around the car after that incident and seeing how wrong it could have gone. I also decided to mention it publicly, standing up for anyone who still couldn’t just forget everything but felt like they couldn’t talk about it. Showing weakness wasn’t a huge part of this sport’s daily routine. A few people immediately questioned my mental strength but my performance the next day showed them otherwise luckily. While the practice sessions went quite well as I somehow found even more speed than usual, it never came out in Qualifying. I got stuck in Q2 and just couldn’t get to the level that we were on during Friday and the morning. P11 was still a good position for points, but with P4s throughout practice sessions, we thought we would get to fight for another podium. Dan had a bigger chance for it, but we all knew it would still be a struggle for him to get up there and also stay there for the remaining laps.
The paddock somehow felt strangely empty compared to other weekends when I entered on Sunday. We all knew who everyone would be looking at for the sessions, but it was astonishing to see how all the cameras were turned towards George every time he showed up. I couldn’t blame them though, we were just as amazed and excited by this change as the fans and the media were. Maybe even more as we knew him a bit more personally and saw how much he deserves to try himself in a Mercedes. I also didn’t mind that all the hype was around him for once, as he deserved it and also gave us a bit of a breather from them always following everyone around the pitlane and paddock. It also carried onto the track with most of the discussion either being about him or involving him, which was also understandable.
Luckily from the moment we got into the cars that energy didn’t follow us and everyone was left with their own little beast and thoughts. It didn’t matter who was in which car, as everyone was your usual opponent and media attention given to one person will not give any kind of advantage to anyone. It was prior to the start of the formation lap when I turned the wheel a bit while looking down at it when I spotted a little sticker behind it. The text on it made me smile but I wondered if it got there thanks to the team or someone else. It had my tiny sunflower sticker, making me suspicious about Dan, although I knew he wouldn’t have had time to do it between the time I looked at the car the last time and the time I got inside.
“ Who’s the sticker from? ” I asked as soon as I took a turn and had a bit of free time on the straight to speak to Aaron. He usually let me get my focus fully back during these laps, but I felt like this wouldn’t change or mess up anything.
“ Lando. Almost got his ass whooped when he came into the garage. ” I got an answer back immediately and I could hear the little chuckle in Aaron’s voice. That must have been a sight, when Lando tried to sneak to my car and then got caught. “ Took you some time to see it finally. ” He added, with a real laugh following his words but getting caught off.
I could remember the first day when I dared to mention to the media how getting back into the car and racing felt a bit strange after the last race and then I went to Lando when they started picking my words apart. Most people thought I wasn’t ready to take part in F1 if something like that brought my confidence down, but somehow it couldn’t really get to me. I wasn’t happy about it and Lando listening to me and giving me advice helped a lot, getting me back to my balance in a few hours. He was the one who told me I shouldn’t follow other people's opinion about me or the team or the car, because I’m not owned by any of them. Which was now on a sticker right in front of my hand, reminding me that whatever others think should not take up space in my head and does not have to be my real end goal.
“ I usually drive with my eyes on the road and not the steering wheel. ” I rolled my eyes a little, focusing on getting the right grid spot and stopping the wheels on the yellow line, before I had a few seconds to lean back and take a deep breath.
Aaron stayed silent from then on, letting me focus on the lights and switching both of us into the usual race mood and mindset. Everything was fun and jokes until it was just seconds away from the lights coming up and then turning off. In the next second my hand was back on the wheel and with one last glance at the sticker my eyes snapped back onto the five lights that lit up after each other and then turned off, signaling all of us that the race is on as everyone took off. Seeing Dan shoot off of his spot on the grid made me smile for a second, before I could see the car next to me getting a bit closer than I felt comfortable with and had to quickly rethink my starting plan to get into a safe spot and keep my position. Instead, making my mind up in just a few seconds I pushed my foot down and ended up in 8th, safe and sound for the next 20 odd laps.
I could see Dan up in the front running at a few turns but when his strategy had him enter the pits I took his position right until it was my turn to take a pit stop finally. Doing a one stop strategy meant that even though I lost a bit of time and a few positions, it was easy to get them back when the others took their second stop, getting out of my way. Only Nicky and Lance were on the same strategy, the latter right in front of me, until his one took longer and I got in front of him just by a few thousands of a second. None of us anticipated the stint going so well and then just as I felt both surprised and hopeful by a chance at a podium place, George fell out from in front of me, giving me P2 in the process. As much as I fought my way up the grid to be in the top 5, it felt unfair to get to second by someone else getting unlucky once and then a second time not long after.
As much as I wanted to focus on keeping my P2 from Lance behind me it was hard to forget about George, who had so much to lose today. Aaron kept my head cool, distracting me from anything that wasn’t in connection with my own driving. It felt like I was flying as I almost got to lead the race behind Sergio so comfortably after a season that was never easy to fight through. Crossing the line in that same position still felt ecstatic even though there was a sour aftertaste in my mouth every time the thought of stepping onto the podium without George went through my mind.
“ Welcome to your first F1 podium procedure, Winola. ” Aaron’s voice over the radio caught my attention and I couldn’t hold back the smile that got onto my face. As much as I was disappointed for George, I knew the team deserved this podium just as much for their hard and relentless work over the weekends. “ I’m sure you will have no problem finding that P2 sign in the pit lane. ” He added, making me thank both him and the whole team as we took one last lap around the circuit to cool down the cars and get back to the pit entrance.
A few seconds later Dan passed me, holding a hand and then his thumb up for me which I copied, keeping up with his pace for a bit before he got in front of me to let others pass. A few cars later I could see Lando’s orange McLaren approaching, aiming for the space next to me. Still following the cool down plans I first sped up a bit putting a gap between the two of us, before slowing down, both in limits of course, as he tried keeping up with the new pace, making him overshoot the space next to me and ending up almost a full car length in front of me. I already had a smile on my face which just got wider during the cat-mouse game I started and then turned into a chuckle as I could see him lift his fist into the air, holding himself back from showing me his middle finger. It would have been deserved too. In the end I gave up, getting myself next to him waving as Lando turned his head towards me and shook it, probably with a smile hiding behind his visor.
While he went with all the other cars I followed Lance’s pink car to the boards, and parked right behind the one that had ‘P2’ printed right across it. After turning everything off, I just sat there for a few seconds with my hands coming up onto the visor of my helmet as I slowly realised what actually happened. I got my head wrapped around my thoughts for a second, before finally getting out of the car. I put the steering wheel back into its place before I let the bodywork hold my weight easily until I jumped off, punching my fist into the air and running to the team immediately. For a split second I thought I would faceplant from the force with which I started running, but luckily a few mechanics caught me before I could embarrass myself in front of the cameras. This second place felt like a win as I got pulled into tight hugs and were met with fistbumps and slaps to my back or helmet. I could feel when Dan arrived at the group hug, almost pushing me off my feet but luckily catching me before I could compensate for the missed faceplant. I thought my face would split into two with my widened grin as he pushed up my visor, the only shield that saved me from everyone knowing I was already crying.
“ I knew it. I told you that you would cry. ” He laughed at me the second he looked through the slot in my helmet, giving it a pat after his words, making me shake my head. He brought me back to the memories we made at the start of the season, making me realise how far we have actually come. “ It’s okay, we all do it. Even if we deny it. ” He shrugged a little, pulling me back into a hug, before the team pulled me away again.
I was soon ushered to the little stand where I could put down my helmet and gloves before finally having a drink. I got to get my interview done second, the whole setting a bit awkward as I never got to experience it before. By the time I finally warmed up to the task we were already done, getting to walk back to my stand until everyone was ready for the podium ceremony. I almost reached my destination when I was pulled back by my arm and enveloped in a hug immediately. I let out a squeal from the surprise that rushed through my body from the force of someone yanking me, but as soon as I realised it was Lando it turned into a chuckle. The first time it actually hit me how tired I felt, was when my body relaxed into his embrace, with my head falling onto his shoulder.
“ I guess the sticker brought you some luck? ” He asked, pushing me back a little, even though I would have gladly let him take my weight, giving me a bit more time to rest. I looked up at him as soon as there was a bit of space between us and and I only had to bend my neck back a little. He wasn’t tall, but then there’s my height that could never actually be called height.
“ It did, thank you. I still can’t really believe it. ” I shook my head a little, letting go of his arm when I realised I was still holding onto him, after getting my balance back. “ This is so bizarre. I feel like I took someone’s place just out of nowhere. ” I let out a sigh, looking around as Checo was still answering some questions and the others slowly getting back to their teams.
“ You took your place. It was waiting just for you, and never let anyone take away from it. You don’t owe them anything. ” Lando answered immediately, repeating similar words to his ‘They don’t own you’ sticker, before the both of us got ushered inside where we would have to part ways. His words stunned me so much that I couldn’t react in time, just let myself get pulled into another hug before he had to get back to his team.
What Lando said stayed with me throughout our wait for the ceremony to start and did not let my stomach calm down. I already had too many feelings swirling around in my gut and it didn’t help when it was time for us to finally get out onto the balcony and take our places on the podium. I already had a few tears in my eyes, chalking them up to the AC inside the building, when it was my turn to walk out and take those two meaningful steps onto the second place of the podium, looking over the crowd of F1 members in front of us. Even though it was my first ever F1 podium ceremony, my eyes were still missing the fans, although I had nothing to compare it to as F2 and F3 podiums were really different.
We waited for Checho to get onto the highest step, clapping for him until everyone stood still to listen to the anthems. As much as I wanted to one day hear mine, right now I was content with what I managed to achieve. Putting the yellow/black cap back onto my head I watched as Checo and their chosen Racing Point employee took their trophies before it was my turn to receive the tiny bit smaller version of it. With a grin taking over my face I stepped forward, making sure I didn’t drop the prize as it still felt huge in my hands, and raising my arm into the hand celebrated with the team even if they couldn’t come closer just yet. While Lance celebrated a bit as well I was already opening up my champagne in order to start spraying the others as soon as the music started. As much as they could have celebrated alone as a team, with both Lance and Checo getting onto the podium, before I could even think about turning away from them their bottles were already aimed at me and I couldn’t hold back my squeal when the cold liquid hit my face and neck.
I was drenched in champagne in just a few seconds, wincing away from the constant attack they started on me. When they turned away from me finally I sprayed them back and then turned towards the crowd and let the champagne go over them even though I knew it would probably not reach them. Stepping back I gladly clinked my bottle to the others’, taking a gulp from it even though champagne wasn’t my drink and my face did scrunch up immediately after the bottle left my lips. I almost stumbled forward with the force that Lance's hand landed on my back in a congratulatory slap that made the both of us laugh in the end, high on adrenaline as the alcohol didn’t yet have time to get into our blood.
Lil met me at the exit of the building, leading me right to the team who were already waiting, silently to my surprise. This changed as soon as I came into their sight, all of them screaming and pulling me into a group hug. I could only hug my trophy closer to make sure it was safe from people bumping into me as the group started jumping up and down. As much as I would have loved to stay and celebrate with them all day long, I had to give my trophy up to one of them after a few photos and leave for the media pen. The knowledge that we had the remaining day after my interviews to celebrate today’s outcome was the only thing that held me back from sticking with the team. We caught Dan for a few seconds as he was leaving with Aurélie and I was entering the pen, and it was perfectly enough time for him to pick me up and spin me around. I felt dizzy and a bit out of breath by the time I could finally feel the ground under my feet again, but I had to get to the sport and didn’t really have to time to calm down before I was already face to face with one of my favourite interviewers.
“ Well, that looked like a fun race to take part in. ” She exclaimed, her excitement just adding even more onto mine. “ How was it from the inside? ” She asked, giving me all the time I needed to get my breath and words together.
“ What gave it away? ” I joked about her first question, the both of us sharing a quick laugh. “ But yes, saying it was enjoyable is an understatement. We gave it our all, as the season is almost over, and it finally worked out. Everyone always worked their ass off to give Dan and I a strategy that could get us either a podium or points, and this weekend everything fell into its place finally. ” I was shaking my head as it still couldn’t wrap itself around the fact that I reached this milestone in my first season.
“ A picture perfect end to the year then? Maybe some motivation for next season with the rebranding and the new car? ” She asked, with the same genuine excitement I always saw on her face whenever we got a few minutes to talk.
“ There’s always something that we can improve on, mostly getting Dan to share a podium with me as well, but I guess that will have to stay for the future. Although Abu Dhabi could still surprise us. ” I shrugged a little, not totally believing my own words, but it was perfect daydreaming material. “ But I’m happy with how this race turned out, and it for sure will give me some much needed confidence inside the car. I feel like we have come a long way since February and it’s also not the end of the road. That’s for sure. ” My grin was probably visible from space, but I was sure it wouldn't die down until I went to sleep from total exhaustion after we finally celebrated today with the team.
“ I’m sure Daniel will gladly celebrate with you like it’s also his podium. He may even offer a space for the trophy at home. ” Her words coming from anyone else would have made me raise my brows, but I could easily detect when she was joking by now.
“ He may but everyone can be sure that the trophy isn’t leaving my hands in the near future. I may even take it on the last race with me in the cockpit. ” I shrugged my shoulders a little, my eyes focusing back on her as she voiced her following question.
Media duties were never and will never be my favourite, but today was bearable and an occasion that I would gladly repeat in a few days time. It let me wind down a little before taking at least a million photos with the team and then changing back into my normal clothing. All the celebrations continued over dinner with music and drinks as well as our usual meals. We all knew the end of the day would bring another race week, but nothing could have held us back from enjoying ourselves this one time. It may have made us a bit more cautious but no one really rejected any drinks that were offered.
In the end the party was shut down a lot earlier than usual, which in the end prompted me to steal a bottle of champagne from the main table and two glasses as well. With those in my hand I left the team behind in search of the one person who didn’t celebrate with us, although I would have liked him there. Carefully, making sure I won’t drop any part of the ‘package’, I knocked on his door as soon as I stepped in front of it. It took him quite some time to open the lock and finally pull the door open. However, as soon as I was met with his sleepy eyes and tousled curls, I knew he must have already gone to bed.
“ I have champagne? ” I offered with a smile, although it would have been fair if Lando sent me away. I was still hopeful and let out a relieved sigh when he stepped away to give me space to enter.
“ That bottle saved you from my wrath. ” He shook his head as he closed and also locked the door behind me. “ So I’m guessing the celebration went well? How does it feel to be on a podium, ” Lando walked back to the bed with me following right behind, until we sat down on his bed.
“ It’s fine. ” I shrugged a little, delighted at the face he made at me as a reaction, before bumping my shoulder into his. “ I’m kidding. It’s unbelievable still, even though I went through the whole process of a podium ceremony. ” I shook my head a little, getting ready to open up the champagne at the same time as kicking down my shoes.
“ The first one always feels strange. But it was deserved. You guys nailed that one stop strategy. ” We clinked our glasses together before taking one sip from it. “ Wouldn’t say it all looked relaxed, comfortable and fun, but in the end it worked out. That’s what matters at the end of the day anyways. ” Lando added, leaning back on the headboard with the sleepy look nowhere to be seen.
“ I was lucky. You don’t have to dance around it. I know I was mostly lucky and just at the right place at the right time. ” My eyes were stuck down on my glass, but the smile never melted off my face though. “ But I’m gonna still enjoy it nevertheless. Tonight is my night, well deserved or not. ” I added while moving up the bed and leaning back right next to him.
“ Hey. ” Lando got my attention, my eyes moving up to his face. “ You deserved it, do not make me repeat myself ever again. ” He shook his head and even though a part of me believed him, I knew this would be a fight in my head that I had to get over by myself. “ If you’re not in the right place at the right time, you wouldn’t have gotten lucky. And one portion of luck doesn’t mean it’s long term. You fought well to keep everyone behind and got the placing you deserved. ” His hand on mine was a welcome weight, in a way grounding my running thoughts and also the adrenaline that was still zooming around my body.
“ How do we always end up on your bed? ” My mind immediately went to lighten the mood, a chuckle accompanying my words before I quickly downed the amount of champagne that was still in my glass.
“ How much did you guys already have before you came here? ” Lando asked, looking up at me when I moved to fill up my glass again. We may have had a few drinks, but I didn’t really feel it’s effect yet.
“ Not much. Don’t fret, I can take a bit more champagne. ” I rolled my eyes a little, putting down the bottle while Lando held the glasses, securing them from falling off the duvet. “ There’s no break to detox before Abu Dhabi, so they got everyone to bed early. ” I let out a sigh, turning back from the bedside table afterwards and taking one out of his hand.
“ And why aren’t you in bed early then? ” He asked back, letting his glass touch mine for a second again. He was waiting for me to answer, but I rather took a sip from the drink before getting onto answering him.
“ I am in bed if you think about it. ” I leaned back again, being the one this time who reached out for his hand and even squeezed back gently. He seemed fairly alert and awake, but you could easily tell he was deep in sleepyland when I knocked on his door.
“ If we look at it like that… Although I’m sure they meant sleeping, and not drinking with your friend. ” Lando shook his head a little, but didn’t stay away from the champagne too much longer either.
“ We will be, just not right now. Although I can leave if I’m not interesting enough. ” I offered, sitting up straighter and pointing towards the door. Truly getting up and leaving was never in my plans, but he didn’t have to know that. “ And not here probably. I have to get back to my room first. ” My nose scrunched up at the idea of having to walk after more alcohol in search of my own room.
“ You don’t have to. There’s enough space here anyways. Who wants to walk after getting tipsy, anyways? ” Lando surprised me with his words, but he only spoke the truth. “ Congrats again. Onto the last race. ” He raised his glass before we took the next sip in sync, the both of us letting out a laugh afterwards. As I was already too lazy to walk more than absolutely necessary when I arrived at his room, in the end his offer seemed comfortable enough to make me stay and fall asleep about an hour and a shower later.
Waking up was fun, right until the headache that last night caused kicked in fully. My only hope was that it was immediately after a race, which meant we would get to relax a bit more than usual. Double headers were already a strain on the body but knowing how I will feel after waking up probably wouldn’t have held me back from celebrating anyways. It wasn’t everyday that you get onto a podium as a rookie, and you can’t just pass on that chance when you’re lucky enough to get it. Taking my phone from the nightstand my eyes were luckily met with a text from Marks, informing me that today is mostly off and I’m only needed for one quick session in the evening before flying to Abu Dhabi. With a sigh I got out of the bed, Lando staying fully asleep, and left the bedroom in order not to wake him up by moving around.
As much as I wanted to wait for him to wake up on his own accord, I knew the team would need me for PR duties and some other interviews. Knowing well what Lando liked and usually ordered for breakfast that fit a driver’s race week diet, I ordered him some breakfast and then took the two glasses and the champagne bottle as I was leaving the room. I knew we would meet up around lunch time, so I wasn’t worried that we wouldn’t get to speak if I leave him there for the day. It was rare that different teams shared a hotel, but luckily I didn’t have to make a run for my own building at dawn and could just walk down the hallway to my own room. Or at least that was the plan, which got cut in half for a second when the first person I saw after leaving Lando’s room was Dan and Aurélie. I should have known our team would be moving around as everyone had meetings and to-do lists to complete before leaving for the next weekend.
“ Good morning! ” They got me out of my staring phase with a synchronized greeting, my cheeks immediately feeling ten times hotter than usual. “ So that’s where the last bottle disappeared to. ” Dan exclaimed right before a laugh breaking free from his insides and I followed his gaze with my eyes, landing them on the bottle in my hands.
“ I… Yeah. Thought no one would be missing one bottle. We had quite a few still when I left. ” I looked back up at Daniel, and even though I was worried he was actually mad at me in a way, I was only met with his usual smile as Aurélie was trying to hold back her laughter. “ What? ” I asked immediately, confused about what part of my sentence they could deem funny.
“ I hope it got the mood up for you guys. ” Dan grinned at me but was already inside the elevator, knowing his words would make me want to hit him. He wasn’t far off as I considered throwing the mentioned bottle at him, but in the end thought it would make too big of a mess. It wasn’t worth it sadly. “ If you guys would like to fly to Abu Dhabi with Max and I, let me know. We have two more seats. ” He added, stunning me at first, but it didn’t sound like such a bad idea in the end.
“ You know what? It did. And I will ask him, thank you. ” I lifted it for a second before sharing a laugh with Aurélie and leaving them to finally get to my room. As much as I could feel the blush creeping up on my neck and cheeks, I wanted to enjoy a great joke and if someone, Dan for sure didn’t mean to hurt anyone with his words.
Getting through the day was a struggle with my headache, but I knew it was just that part of the day before I would get to rest a little. The break between the last interview and my late training session consisted of a quick lunch and a long nap in my hotel room. I didn't really get to meet up with Lando before it was already time for me to leave for the hotel gym. Arriving into the lobby I was about to just straight away go to the room that Mark reserved for us, when I spotted Lando chatting away to some fans with Charlotte by his side. He looked just a tiny bit tired, but was far better off then how I still felt from yesterday. The difference between someone partying and someone just drinking a glass or two. Although it still wouldn't have made me change my mind. After a quick glance at my watch, making sure I wasn't late and had a bit of time, I was already turned towards him and got close enough that I got his attention but wasn't rushing them or the fans in any way. It was their lucky day, I wasn't about to ruin it when I could talk to Lando whenever I felt like it.
I waited until Lando signed their caps and took a few pics with them, a smile getting on my face as well, remembering how it felt to meet F1 drivers while you were only a fan and also while fighting towards a seat. Never with Lando, as he was a part of my life before it could turn into a colleague like relationship, but with almost any other driver from the grid who was already racing while we were just karting or fighting through the junior series. He was already saying bye to them and turning towards me when they seemed to spot me as well and asked for pictures. I snapped out from going down memory lane, my head feeling dizzy for a second as I went from a long time F1 fan to the F1 driver I was now, realising that their question shouldn’t have sounded as strange as it felt for me. The second I realised they were waiting for an answer I nodded and stepped closer, letting them decide how they wanted the picture but I wasn’t surprised when they requested Lando to be in one or two as well.
“ Hi! ” He turned towards me, with his usual grin on show, as soon as the girls were content and walking away from us. “ How’s your head? ” He inquired while Charlotte was still on her phone, meaning we had a bit of time before any of us would have to go.
“ Achie, but I deserve it. Hopefully it will get better before we get to Abu Dhabi. ” I let out a sigh, shaking my head carefully not to make everything worse. “ I wanted to find you during lunch, but ended up napping the time away. Dan offered to take both of us on Max’s jet to Abu Dhabi, if you’re up for it. ” I finally got to the subject that I was looking for him in the first place for. The other is just generally talking with him for a bit.
“ If they’re sure about it I would love to. It will be fun, that’s not even up for debate. ” He accepted my offer without any second thoughts or actually barely any thinking about it. I shouldn’t have been surprised, knowing he was quite good friends with Max and Daniel as well. “ Sure you can take them one on one for a few hours? ” His chuckle made one of my eyebrows raise up in question. “ Never mind, it will be fun. ” Lando clapped me on the shoulder, turning towards Charlotte when she called out his name.
“ Go, before she gets angry. None of us wants to experience that again. ” I shook my head while wincing at the memory, before trying to shake it out of my head. As funny as it was, you never wanted her anger to be aimed towards you.
I gladly moved into the hug Lando initiated as we said goodbye and turned towards our own destination. The second I lifted my eyes from my watch I could spot Mark at the entrance to the hallway, leading from the lobby towards the gym and swimming pool, meaning I was already quite late. The numbers on my watch only assured me of the suspected situation, making me quicken my steps towards my trainer. Luckily he seemed to be on the happier side of life that day, and didn’t try to jokingly punish me or push me to my limits too much for my rare mistake either. For once I could thank the ‘recovery day gods’ for saving me from his anger. Thanks to them I could actually get back to my room without a limp in my step and actually managed to get into the shower without fighting my lazy and tired side.
After a quick shower I got on the phone with Dan to accept his offer about the flight to our next race destination, getting all the info about the journey down on paper. Knowing that Lando would be in the middle of some kind of a team meeting, I only texted him the infos and started packing all my remaining stuff. Living out of a suitcase most of the time had its perks, one being the tiny amount of packing one had to do while travelling from one place to another. Let’s not mention the cons of it though. Just as I sat back down on my bed to bug Lando about not answering me, a message from him arrived on my device making me smile. He also pretty much decided on his own that we would be having dinner together before taking a car to the airport, and didn’t give me a chance to decline in any way. Not that I would have, anyways.
He seemed adamant about getting everything sorted, from getting us a taxi to getting us a table somewhere, that he also kept a secret right until we got there. Luckily it wasn’t anything fancy, my basic choice of clothing fitting the diner, but a place that I mentioned to him during our off days prior to the weekend. I was both surprised and touched that he remembered and went out of his way to make it all happen before we would leave. The atmosphere and the food was out of this world, and even though it probably didn’t fully fit our dietary plan, it would have stayed between us anyways. At least I wouldn’t go and tell on him if he kept it to himself as well. What Mark and Jon didn’t know about wouldn’t hurt them. Or us. Depends on the perspective, really.
After our meal we got another taxi to the airport, where we easily walked through all the checks and were escorted to a lounge for the private jet. I was quite surprised to see Max and Daniel nowhere, but thought they were just either running a bit late or were already on the plane while they ran through our papers once more. I didn’t really understand why Lando looked quite nervous, given we weren’t about to travel with strangers or with a big crowd, but with friends he should have known well and it was his own decision to travel with them. By the time we had to board the plane, and our travel buddies were still missing I was starting to suspect some funny business going on in the background. Lando’s anxious leg shaking throughout our whole waiting time didn’t help my thoughts in any way either.
“ What’s going on, Lando? ” I couldn’t wait any longer to ask then when we were walking up the steps to the plane. He didn’t turn back towards me but never gave me an answer. At least not in the form of words.
My brows were furrowed already, but the lines on my forehead got even deeper as he let me go through the door first, making me the first one to get onto the plane. I was close to getting scared about going first, thinking that they might be planning some kind of a prank on me, but the voices I could hear erased any and every thought from my head. I didn’t even care about my luggage anymore, leaving my suitcase in the way of the entrance and took a few huge steps to finally see for myself if I was just imagining the voices or it was my actual reality. A huge part of me was sure I was actually going insane, but my eyes confirmed the picture created in my head as I could see my whole family on board, not paying any attention to us boarding. It was only my scream that got their heads turned towards the entrance, with less surprise on their faces than I had of course.
I probably could have broken some kind of world record with the speed I had for the few steps I had to take to get to my mum at first, and then everyone else. I could hardly let anyone get out of my squeeze to get to another person, slowly getting through the line that formed as everyone stood up. I couldn’t believe my eyes to see both my parents and all my siblings in front of me and not just through a screen. It took me a good ten minutes to calm down finally, just in time for all of us to sit down as the plane was set to finally leave the airport and take us to Abu Dhabi. I took a seat right next to Lando and across from my parents who looked exactly as ecstatic as probably I did from the outside, but at least felt inside.
“ You’re staying for the whole week? ” My excitement was slowly calming down as everything sank down in my head and it wasn’t such an alien thought after missing them for so long. Mum’s nod made me grin once again before I couldn’t hold back any longer and finally brought up the last race, to tell them everything face to face finally.
Props to them, they all listened to my rambling, even seeming excited about my story, even though they followed the race on TV and already listened to my presentation through a phone. I was even a bit disappointed that I didn’t have the trophy with myself, as it seemed safer to make it travel with the team, but I also knew we would have the time to show them after landing. We didn’t have to get everything ticked off the list in one hour, when we had a whole week and even the weekend for it anyways. I knew I was running on new found adrenaline the second everyone seemed tired other than me, dozing off in their seats while I was still scrolling through my social media, showing Lando a pic once in a while as he was still awake next to me. By the time I decided to put down my phone, only Lando was awake, but getting ready to sleep as he got back to his seat with a blanket.
“ Wanna share half of it? ” He asked just as I was about to ask for exactly what he offered, and I could only nod as an answer. Without another word he got our footrests up and the blanket draped over the both of us, luckily big enough that we could fit under it both.
I had a debate in my head with myself just for a second, before I pushed up the hand rest that was between our seats, leaning my head on his shoulder. He didn’t even seem surprised and that’s why I got a bit scared when he pulled away abruptly, straightening myself up immediately. I got even more confused when he took his discarded hoodie from the little table we had. My cheeks stayed their normal colour only because they didn’t have time to produce enough blush. However the second he placed the folded up hoodie on his shoulder, leaning back fully in his seat, it seemed like only a few milliseconds were enough for that missing blush to arrive. I was glad he was way too deep in his phone to have a chance to look up and make fun of my new colour. Trying my best I just put back my head in it’s previous spot, hiding my cheek into the soft material as much as I could, catching a whiff of his usual cologne coming off of it in the process. It made me sigh out which prompted Lando to turn his head a little and look at me out of the corner of his eye. As an answer I just gently shook my head, closing my eyes again and focusing on getting some sleep as soon as possible.
When I woke up my head needed a minute or two to realise where I actually was while it was still laying on Lando’s shoulder. My leg also must have moved over his, his hand holding it in place, while we were asleep making me halfway draped over him. Feeling the weight of his head and his curls a bit on my forehead held me back from moving too much around as we still had a few minutes before landing and waking him up wasn’t really a priority. Opening my eyes again they landed right on my mum who had a meaningful smile on her face that made me blush as soon as I completely wrapped my head around the situation. I mostly just closed my eyes again until it was really time for us to wake up, when luckily it was Lando who first started moving around meaning I didn’t have to be the mean one, poking him awake. He seemed pretty out of it at first but got himself together by the time the plane finally landed and we were allowed to get off with all our baggage.
The thought of having my family out at a GP again still felt strange as we took a car ride to the hotel where we had our reserved rooms. Lando’s team was at a different one but he still kept us company for the ride and got most of my family’s bags out of the trunk with the help of my dad before taking the same taxi to his own team’s hotel. As it was already late and everyone was tired anyways we all decided to just get our rooms, have a quick dinner and then call it a night. Before going to bed I still made sure to send a thank you message to Lando, but I only saw his reaction to it in the morning as I fell asleep the second my whole body touched the duvet.
I was glad that I never held back from sending that message as in the remainder of the week we never really had time to meet up and talk more than a few words. The first time I got to really talk to him was during an interview that included both of us after the first two free practice sessions, getting to discuss the whole season and the feelings we were bringing into the last race. It all felt like a simple conversation with jokes flying all over the place as well as of course the usual teasing that us being in the same area almost always brought out of people. It was still a lovely start to the weekend and got our spirits up even if the schedule was packed and we didn’t get much socialising after this occasion. As much as this was the last race it still held the same importance and we couldn’t just forget about it. It was still an important occasion for a chance at points that the team needed.
Somehow it turned out to be pretty underwhelming after everything, although that was actually good news in a way. We were happy for the couple of points we managed to get, but it wasn’t the same kind of content feeling afterwards. The only thing that made it special was having my whole family there, watching the race from the stands and also getting to support me right from the garage through the sessions. All of them would have never fit in that small space, but they managed to decide who and when would sit in the garage rather than their seats in the grandstand. There was a smile that never left my face, not even when we had to separate for the nights as they had their rooms a bit further away from me. I usually went to bed with it, and woke up with it still being there, only disappearing while I was in the car and had to focus.
It took a bit of time for both Dan and I to tick all the interviews off the to-do list which meant we could finally film our last team video together. It turned out to be a bit emotional, the thought of separating from him, in the team mates sense of the word, becoming actual reality just as we neared the end of the day. The end of the video felt like it was a real closing point of the season and the start of something new and uncertain but also very exciting. Even though we were free to leave the spot with the camera crew gone, none of us really made a move to stand up and leave the spot where we were sitting at the pitwall right across our garages. It was strange to see the packing get to the point where they started to take off the boards with our names and pictures, from above our own garage openings.
“ Hey. It might be Lando jumping on my nerves and challenging my calmness next year, but that doesn’t mean you can’t come to me. Understood? ” I felt him bumping our shoulders together just as I turned towards him, peeling my eyes off of the packing crew. “ I’m still here, just a few garages away. Even for questions that sound stupid, yeah? ” He asked again, not letting go of my eyes as I nodded.
“ Thank you. I can’t say I won’t need it. ” I let out a chuckle, knowing there will be moments when I will be unsure about the right answer. “ You know... I don’t think I could have asked for a better partner in crime for my first ever season. ” My voice might have sounded a bit shaky during the last few words, but reading his face as much as I could he wouldn’t have been much better off. The hand clapping my back instead of words coming as a reaction also told me that I must have been right.
“ It has been a pleasure. ” He forced his words out in the end, making us both laugh by how formal our conversation sounded. However we both knew, as much as we joked around and with laughter being a main part of the last year, all these words were real and we both meant what came out of our mouths.
It was only when he had to leave that we finally got off of our butts, him leaving towards the car park while I went to get my things together from the garage. I opted for a last walk down the pit lane after retrieving my backpack, watching as I passed every garage, all the teams packing up already. I didn’t miss Lando still standing around, with his team and his phone in hand, and I was about to just wave at him as a goodbye when he called after me. I turned back to see him pass the phone to the two guys next to him while he quickly caught up to me actually running.
“ Hey! Are you coming to the after party? ” He asked without any hesitation, getting to the point immediately. “ I’m sure Dan mentioned it and I hope you didn’t think we would let you pass on it. ” He added with a grin and his arm came up around my shoulder as we continued on my previous route to the parking lot.
“ I knew you guys won’t let me just go back and sleep as normal people would like to do. ” I had to roll my eyes, my smile staying put though as I knew from the moment Daniel brought the party up that I wouldn't get to miss it. “ Yes, I’m going. I already have my outfit waiting for me in my room. ” I let out a sigh when he was still waiting for a real answer from me, even though I thought my words said enough already.
“ Fantastic. Just what I wanted to hear. ” He pulled me closer, almost making the both of us stumble and fall to the ground but luckily somehow we caught ourselves just in time. “ How about I take a taxi to your hotel half an hour earlier than the party and we go together from there? ” He stopped when we got to the end of the pitlane where I would take the exit.
“ I would like that. But don’t be late. Might take myself there alone otherwise. ” I tried to threaten him a bit, even though I knew it probably would never work. He knew me better than to believe such empty words coming from me.
His answer was enough for me though, both saying our goodbyes before I turned towards the exit and he walked back to his team to continue whatever they were doing on his phone. It was only back at the hotel when I realised they were probably already streaming when I met him, as he was still live on Twitch with both of the guys standing around him as well. Deciding it could be my entertainment while getting ready I positioned the phone somewhere safe while I took a shower and got dressed again. I was surprised when he was still going as I was already pretty much done with everything but my hair.
‘ Shouldn’t you be on your way? You might be late already… ’ I took my phone into my hands to send him a message privately and with a bit of a delay could actually hear his phone go off with the notification.
It was already worth it to send it when I could see his face change as he checked his watch for the time and then rushed to the end of the stream. He was of course still on time and would arrive just as I finished up with everything. It was still fun to play with him and make him a bit worried to see his face change in record time. While my screen went dark with his stream turning off I got started on my hair. It didn’t take longer than usual and just as I packed everything away there was a knock on my door. As a last step I pulled on my sandals before taking my little bag from the bed and walked up to the door to open it, revealing Lando in a baby blue shirt and white pants.
“ I’m surprised but also not really, how you’re exactly on time. ” I laughed as his face finally relaxed a little from the tense look he had on just as I stepped outside. “ The fans seemed surprised and sad how quickly you had to leave. ” I let out a sigh, trying to put on a sad face to accompany my words.
“ They would probably let me off the hook if they knew I had a party to attend with someone like you. ” His compliment wasn’t anticipated in any way from my side, making even my hands freeze for a second as I was putting away my keycard. When I looked up at him he already had his signature smirk on, knowing full well he managed to catch me off guard with how his tone told me he meant everything.
We got into the elevator still silently, the both of us leaning back onto the wall, but I couldn’t hold back from looking at him for longer than three floors. I was ready for more teasing words or a cocky grin but his only reaction was reaching out his hand towards me just as we reached the ground floor. With a sigh and a shake to my head I took his hand, letting him lead us out of the building and to a car that took us to the part of the local beach where the party was planned. We could hear the music from a corner away and easily spotted the pack from the entrance as we were granted entry at the sight of our passes.
Turned out we were just on time to get a glass of champagne and listen to the quick season summary before the real partying started. With a last storm of applause and everyone clinking their glasses together the season was deemed close and the music got turned back on, our ears getting saved only by the fact that we were outside and not in a closed-in club. Even if I would have tried to get away after the first few minutes of dancing, Lando and Daniel made sure that I would always have someone keeping me there. I couldn’t say I wasn’t enjoying it as my laughter throughout the night would have betrayed me, but I was still relieved every time when I got to leave the dance floor to get myself a new drink.
After hours of dancing, drinking, conversing and just simply having fun, my feet were happy when Lando offered for us to sit down somewhere. I was a tad bit confused when he seemed to have clocked onto a sitting hammock at the side of the party venue, but I never really stopped him on our way there. I watched intently as he sat down, still holding my hand in his, that he seconds later used to pull me down as well. At the start of the night I might have tried to squeeze in beside him, but right then and there my only thought was to not get his slacks sandy as I sat down on his lap sideways. The back of the hammock almost fully shielded us from the partying herd enough that I could let myself relax into his arm that came around my middle, in order to hold me back from falling off the hammock. We had a great view on the open water with all the music and noise behind us, a bit more muffled than it has been while we were in the center of the crowd. Thanks to probably the alcohol in my bloodstream and also to how tired I was Lando’s whispered “ I’m really glad you’re here too. ” almost went unnoticed even though he said it right next to my ear.
“ Here as in right now with you? Or just in general? ” I wondered when my brain finally processed his words and I realised he wasn’t just thinking out loud. I lifted my gaze onto him from the surface of the water, even though his sudden close proximity made me freeze for a beat.
“ Both. Just you existing and also being part of this whole circus. ” Lando shrugged, his arm tightening around me while he took a sip of his cocktail. I had my drink as well still, but felt like this conversation should be had before I would down even more of it. “ The only part I always like about this hectic place. Even if we had a few bumps on the road until now. ” He was rather looking at the view than me, but in a way I was glad for it, as I got to examine his face without him really noticing.
“ Quite the potholes if you ask me… ” I tore my eyes away from his irises to carefully move around a bit and sit in a way that I could rest my head on his shoulder. “ Surprised we managed to get through it. We’re both a bit too hot headed for things like this. As much as they think you’re a shy little kid, you have your moments. ” I poked his side ‘accidentally’ with my elbow and could immediately feel the shaking of his body as he both tried to pull away from my attack and tried to hold back his laughter.
“ You’re one to talk. We’re both just as bad as the other. ” He shrugged a little, his fingers digging into my side as he tried to make me squirm, and sadly succeeded with his siege. “ You’re the one with a dragon on her helmet. It fits you well. ” He added, making me roll my eyes, but it wasn’t enough to make me wanna leave. After the whole season nothing would get me to actually leave his side. At least not things that could actually happen.
“ Exactly why I have it on there. Scares people away before they try to get close to me. ” My head fell back onto his shoulder, my forehead resting on his neck and my eyes fluttering close. “ I just need to come up with something new design wise for next year. With the new colours. ” I let out a sigh, already daydreaming about the new season, even though usually it stressed me out. His proximity had a great effect on numbing my brain and making me relax. “ You should design one for me. Yours always looks pretty neat. ” I looked up at him, immediately feeling as excitement slowly woke up my brain.
“ I’m not against the idea. But you can’t say no if it’s not perfect. ” He raised his finger in front of my face, threatening me in the funniest way possible. I accepted his conditions with a nod, letting my head fall back in it’s previous spot, staying put even when he flicked my nose. His body shook with his laughter but it wasn’t in any way uncomfortable.
The songs in the background came one after the other, the party seeming endless with all the noise and shouting. In that moment I felt free in every sense of the word. We finally closed a season, giving us some time off, that we could decide to spend however we wanted. It was also the first time where I didn’t try and answer every question that popped up in my head and just tried to enjoy the moment. Also the fact that no kind of media was allowed to the party let me really just go with the flow without worrying what will get onto the world wide web for every fan to see. The drivers still could post content about our night, but we both knew they were our friends who would look out for us and make sure to not post anything that we wouldn’t approve of.
That free feeling was the only thing that gave me enough confidence to move my head off his shoulder, accidentally bumping into his chin as he made the same movement. I couldn't help a quiet chuckle right until his arm moved up from around my waist to around my neck. His eyes were everywhere, in the end focusing in on mine finally, a smile getting onto both of our faces. I could feel his fingers going through my hair absentmindedly, as it was pushed onto my shoulder where his arm was resting. His other hand was still on my thigh, resting right under where my dress ended, his fingers drumming on my skin to the rhythm of the songs in the background. It was all a welcome feeling and sensation going up to my scalp and running through my whole body. His gaze only intensified its effects even though his eyes were even softer than usual. It was the first time I didn't try to understand what's going through his head, although I was pretty sure we had almost the same thoughts and ideas going through our brains.
I would never be able to tell who moved first, but it wasn't important anyways. The only thing I could focus on was how his lips met mine in a quick and chaste kiss. His arm stayed around my neck, holding me closer softly, giving me the chance to pull away any time. Not that I needed that chance. My eyes opened again the second we separated, his doing the same and meeting mine immediately. I could almost feel his smile on my own skin from our proximity and couldn't hold back from the need to experience it as I leaned forward for another kiss. We soon separated again for air, prompting me to move around a little, turning more towards him in order to hide my face in his shoulder. As much as I moved in for the second one, my thoughts caught up to me finally, making me blush immediately. I could feel as he took the glass that was still in my hand, putting it aside before he fully hugged me closer to himself. The moment my hand was free it shot up to the nape of his neck, holding on, even though I already felt secure from falling by his arms. I couldn't help but let my fingers go through the short hairs there, while a shiver ran through my body at first by his breath on my neck and then by the little kiss he left right behind my ear, brushing my hair away from the spot to give himself space.
" Don't you dare close me out now. " Lando spoke up, right next to my ear, leaving another kiss there before leaning back a little. I followed his movement with my body, hiding my face back into his neck but bumping my nose into his jaw intentionally in the process. "You can put on a dress like this but then be shy about a kiss? " I could both feel and hear his chuckle shaking his whole body while his hand slid onto my back to emphasize his words, about my backless dress.
" They're two very different things. " I mumbled into his skin, amazed at how he seemed to understand what I said. " You can't compare them... " I moved my head a little, looking down at his hand that had the bracelet on which I gave him not long ago. It always made me feel warm inside, knowing he actually liked it enough to wear it every day. " But I won't, it just surprised me in a way. " I shrugged a little, moving back again and letting my hand slide down to his stomach. I didn't dare to look up at him yet but was perfectly fine and content letting him take my hand in his and hold it there.
“ I’m glad the season ended when and how it did. I wouldn’t exchange it for anything, not even winning the championship. ” His words made me look up immediately and when I realised he wasn’t joking I had to fight my own emotions. In the end, just a second later, my disbelief won over getting wooed by his compliment and I swatted at his chest full force.
“ Yes you would and should. I would be actually angry if you didn’t exchange it for the championship. ” I shook my head at him, totally forgetting about how looking into his eyes would make me feel after everything. I slumped back into my previous spot, but at the same time couldn’t look away. It was visible even in his eyes as his grin got wider and I was more than mesmerized by the front row view I got of it.
“ Hi. ” He bit out just in time, before my elbow met his ribcage and he let out a huff of air, surrendering to my attack. “ Feisty. Has anyone told you that before? ” His hands tried shielding his sides from another round of attack that his words could have brought onto himself.
I was just about to roll my eyes at him when I could see movement in the corner of my eyes, and turning my head I was met with Daniel standing not far away from us. “ Lovebirds, wanna be part of the group pic? ” He called out to us, not giving me any time to feel embarrassed by our position. He didn’t seem one bit surprised and was already turning away when Lando answered his question.
I was the first one to get to my feet, taking my sandals and the remainder of my drink into hand, knowing I would probably lose them otherwise. I watched as Lando did the same with his shoes and glass, my eyes sticking to the part of his shirt where a few too many buttons were opened as he straightened up. In my dazed state I gladly took his hand when it was offered to me, letting him pull me towards the group gently. We both left our shoes at our official table before joining everyone else at the front of the bunch thanks to both of our heights. I didn’t pull away when Lando’s arm came around the front of my shoulder, in that moment giving up any care of the world around us. I just wanted to enjoy the bit of time we still had before the break started.
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Heyy, I saw your prompt list— could you maybe do Mackelena (with a side of Philinda and Huntingbird, if possible) and soulmates? Congrats of 111 followers!!
Thank you so much!!! I hope you enjoy this-- it's my first AOS fic so here goes nothing!
Pairing: Alphonso Mackenzie/Elena Rodriguez (minor Philinda and Huntingbird)
Word Count: 3,143
Tags/Warnings: rated G (for giant simp, which Mack is, good talk), character death mentioned, as is divorce
For most of his life, Mack had believed in soulmates. He’d grown up being taught that he’d meet someone, and when they first touched, their respective soulmate marks-- for him, a mark on his right hand, very dark brown streaked through with honey-gold-- would light up, and they would share a Moment. A brief snippet of time from the future that would show them their life together, if they chose to move forward with their relationship.
Some didn’t. Mack knew people who hadn’t stayed with their soulmate. But he’d seen, overwhelmingly, that when a person found their soulmate and stuck with them, they were far happier than if they didn’t.
He’d always thought that the only woman he’d ever be in a serious relationship with would be his soulmate. But then he’d met Nicole. The two of them had fallen hard and fast, and even now, after their divorce, Mack would never say he regretted it. Regretted how it ended, yes. But he had loved Nicole, even if she hadn’t been his soulmate.
Some days, Mack wasn’t sure if he’d ever find his soulmate. But he was fine with that for now, fine working at the mechanic shop that he co-owned. He had friends around him, and he visited his brother whenever he could. So he’d wait, and that was okay for now.
There were days, though, when he wondered. Was there really one woman waiting out there for him somewhere?
The sound of arguing broke Mack out of his musings, and he looked up from the car just as Fitz stalked into the back of the garage, looking irritated. Running a hand through his already messy hair, he said, “I’ve had about enough of this, it’s your turn. Have fun.”
“Have fun with what?” Mack asked, wiping his hands off on the rag he had resting next to his toolbox. “Something wrong, Turbo?”
Clearly trying to calm himself, Fitz took a deep breath and pointed over his shoulder. “There’s an irate customer out there, demanding that we hurry up and fix her car. I tried telling her that we’ve got a queue and we’re going to start on hers soon, but she didn’t exactly give me a chance. She wants to talk to the mechanic who’s working on her car.”
“Which name is that?” Mack asked.
“Rodriguez-- she’s on your list, I think.”
“Great.” Suppressing a grimace, Mack set aside the rag and headed towards the door that separated the garage where they worked and their main office. “I’ll be back in a minute or two.”
“If you’re lucky,” Fitz muttered.
Ignoring that, Mack stepped through the doorway. He spotted the customer almost immediately-- a Latina woman with dark brown hair braided back from her face, dressed in a black leather jacket and jeans. She caught sight of him and stomped up towards him. “Oh, you must be the turtle man who’s working on my car,” she said, her low voice furious.
One of Mack’s eyebrows shot up, despite himself. “Turtle man? We’ve only had the car for a couple weeks.”
“Yes, and I need it fixed,” the woman said emphatically. “Fast, so why don’t you get a move on? If I’d known you were going to take all year--”
Holding up his hands, Mack said, “I understand you’re upset, Ms. Rodriguez. But one of our best workers quit last week, and we’re having a hard time catching up. Obviously we’ll get your car done as soon as possible, but there are a few other cars before it. I should be done with them over the next few days, and I will personally make sure that your car is taken care of. Does that sound fair?”
Ms. Rodriguez eyed him for a moment, looking skeptical, but then let out a sigh. “Okay. I’m-- I’m sorry, I didn’t know you were short-staffed.”
“Nothing we can’t handle, it’s just a little backlog,” Mack assured her. “But I promise you, Ms. Rodriguez, your car will be one of the next ones.”
“Good to know,” she said with a nod. “And you can call me Elena. I mean, it’s the least I can do considering I kind of chewed out your friend back there. And you.”
Releasing a chuckle, Mack said, “Fitz can handle it. You can call me Mack, and we’ll call you as soon as your car is ready.”
Shaking her head, Elena said, “Oh, I don’t think so, Turtleman.”
“Sorry?” Mack asked, caught off guard.
“After how long it’s taken already? I’m coming back here to make sure you don’t start ignoring me again. I’ll be back in two days. See you then.”
With that, Elena breezed out of the office, leaving Mack with his mouth open as he stared after her. Huh, he thought, eventually turning to head back to his work. It looked like he’d be seeing a lot more of this Elena.
Sure enough, Elena was back two days later, just as Mack finished work on the last car and had started an assessment to see what was wrong with Elena’s. The short answer was, he soon learned, everything. This car was not going to be a short project.
When he told Elena that, she just shrugged. “Guess you’ll be seeing me a lot, Turtleman. Get used to it, and get to work.”
“Yes, ma’am,” Mack said, hiding a grin as he headed off to find his toolbox.
~ ~ ~
“Soulmates definitely aren’t real,” Bobbi told him.
Mack raised a skeptical eyebrow at his friend. “What makes you say that?” he asked, taking a sip of his drink. They were at a bar, celebrating the promotion Bobbi had gotten at her job-- although Mack had a feeling there was another reason they were here. He’d known Bobbi long enough that he could figure it out when there was something she wanted to tell him.
“It doesn’t make any sense, scientifically,” Bobbi explained. “And it’s definitely not logical. I mean, touching someone and you see the future? It doesn’t really make any sense, Mack.”
“Maybe not,” Mack admitted, deciding not to expand on his own theories in that area. “But there’s a lot about love that doesn’t make sense, and it’s not like the whole world had one mass hallucination.”
“Maybe not,” Bobbi said, sounding skeptical. “But unless you can provide me with a scientific explanation for it, I’d say it’s a load of bull.”
“Uh-huh,” Mack said. “So the soulmate thing had nothing to do with the fact that you’re back with Hunter again?”
“Of course not--” Bobbi stopped. “Wait. You knew?”
“Didn’t take much to put it back together,” Mack said wryly. “You only take me out for drinks out of the blue like this when you need to tell me something important, and it’s usually about you and him. Also, he changed his Facebook photo to you and him again.”
“Wha-- I told him to be subtle!” Bobbi let out a groan, burying her face in her hands. “He is so typical.”
“So, you are back together,” Mack said, and he saw a small smile start across Bobbi’s face.
“Well… yeah. We are. We’re taking it slow, and he’s at least trying to not make soulmate comments-- but that’ll last.” Giving him a sideways glance, Bobbi asked, “How do you feel about this?”
“What, you and Hunter?” Mack took another drink to avoid answering right away. “I’m happy for you two, obviously. I just don’t want to see either of you hurt again. I’ve had to bail Hunter out of too many drunk tanks for that.”
“I know-- that’s part of why we’re taking it slow this time,” Bobbi said with a laugh. “For your sanity.”
“My sanity appreciates the effort, but I’m not the one in the relationship,” Mack pointed out. “It’s up to you two, not me. But seriously, I am happy for you guys.”
“Thanks, Mack,” Bobbi said. “By the way, I might have asked Hunter if he’d meet us for dinner nearby.”
“I had a feeling there was another part to the plan,” Mack said. “Well, if you two are paying, I’m in.”
They made their way to the restaurant where Hunter was waiting, and had just settled down at the table with him and were starting to flip through the menus to order when Mack’s phone buzzed.
“Ah-- hang on one minute,” he told them, pulling out his phone and checking it. He was pleasantly surprised to see it was a text from Elena, who had gotten his phone number the second time she’d come by the garage, in order to ‘make sure he was keeping on task’ in her words.
The text held an image of a turtle, and the words, at the zoo earlier. I think I found your long lost brother.
Mack found himself grinning as he texted back, For someone who wants their car fixed fast, you’re not very nice to the guy fixing it.
Elena’s response was quick. What, are you gonna not fix it now? I found your long lost brother! Mack chuckled as her next text came a few seconds later. Besides, you’re too much of a softie to refuse to finish the job for me.
Guess you know me too well, Mack responded.
Well enough to know you’re a softie.
Shaking his head, Mack put away his phone and looked up to see Bobbi and Hunter watching him, both wearing sly grins. “Who was that?” Hunter asked, innocence dripping from his tone.
“Just a friend,” Mack said. He knew better than to give Hunter too much information when he was in a mood like this. Grabbing his menu, he flipped it open and started browsing, ignoring the sly looks that Bobbi and Hunter exchanged. He was going to get interrogated about this, he knew already. But there would be nothing for them to find out. Elena was just a friend, after all.
~ ~ ~
“By the way, soulmates are definitely real,” Phil Coulson told him.
Mack gave him a surprised look as he took the paper bag from the older man. He’d stopped at Phil’s coffee shop on the way into work, as he did from time to time, and was picking up coffee and desserts for the shop. “Why do you bring that up?” he asked.
Shrugging, Phil said, “Something Bobbi and Hunter mentioned when they were in here yesterday.”
“Let me guess-- Hunter brought up him and Bobbi being soulmates again?” Mack said, grinning wryly.
“Surprisingly, no,” Phil said as he rang up his bill. “They were discussing you. Hunter is under the impression you’ve met your soulmate for some reason, and Bobbi was telling them that they don’t exist.”
“Huh. Sounds about right,” Mack said, trying to hide his surprise. Although it shouldn’t shock him that Hunter immediately made the leap from “texting someone he likes” to “he has a soulmate and hasn’t told us”. Bobbi would probably handle things a little more cautiously, thankfully. “Looks like I’d better tell him he’s wrong.”
“Really? No one yet?” Phil asked.
Mack shrugged as he handed over cash for the order. “I have no idea who she is or where she is. I have been married before, but I guess that was part of why we didn’t last. Part of it, anyway.”
Nodding, Phil said, “I know the feeling. I was in love quite a few times before May and I finally met.”
“Really?” Mack said in surprise.
“Sure. Just because there’s one specific person out there for you doesn’t mean you won’t be attracted to other people. It’s normal.” Putting the cash in the register, Phil said, “But there’s something different about the woman who’s the one for you. I could tell right away that she was special. Just took a while for us to realize just what was different.”
“What he’s not telling you,” came the voice of Melinda May as she came in through the front door, a duffel bag over her shoulder, “is that it took us two years to finally figure out that we were soulmates, and it was only because he’d just been hit by a car and I had to give him CPR.” She held up one hand, stained a sunny yellow.
“We all find love in different ways,” Phil said, giving May a soft, loving grin. “How was class?”
“We’ve got some new idiots to beat up on,” May replied, moving behind the counter to drop a kiss onto her husband’s cheek. “And Daisy kicked a practice dummy through a wall, so she’s getting even better.”
“My wife and daughter are terrifying,” Phil said, grinning even wider. “Here’s your change, Mack.”
“Oh-- thanks.” Pocketing it, Mack gave May and Phil a nod before heading out the door and down the street.
It only took him a few minutes to walk the short distance back to the garage, and when he got there, he found a familiar, slight figure waiting for him next to her car, with a sly grin on her face.
“Late again, Turtleman,” Elena teased him as Mack set the paper bag down on the nearest clean surface.
“I’m pretty sure you’re always here early, Yo-Yo,” he told her.
“Yo-Yo?” Elena lifted a curious eyebrow at him.
“Yeah, cause you keep coming back here.”
“You’d almost think you minded me showing up,” she teased as Mack pulled open the paper bag and pulled out two disposable cups of coffee.
Handing her one, he said, “I don’t mind.”
The smile Elena shot at him was brighter than the sunshine coming through the window in the corner, and it warmed Mack as he got to work.
~ ~ ~
“Hey, Mack?”
Mack looked up from his work on Elena’s car to where Daisy was sitting in the back of her dad’s 1962 Chevy Corvette, which he affectionately referred to as “Lola.” However, Lola needed a little work done, so Phil had relinquished the car into Daisy’s hands, and she’d brought it to Mack for him to look at.
“What’s up, Tremors?” he asked.
Daisy didn’t respond right away, fiddling with the edge of her jacket as she bit her lip. “Do you believe in soulmates?” she blurted out.
One of Mack’s eyebrows shot up, and he almost asked what prompted the question-- but stopped abruptly as he remembered what day it was. A year to the day since Daisy’s boyfriend, Lincoln, had died when a robber had broken into his house and shot him when he’d tried to protect Daisy. The man had been arrested, but Mack knew that only soothed part of the pain for his friend.
“I do,” he said cautiously-- he’d never learned whether Lincoln was Daisy’s soulmate or not. Regardless, he decided to speak the truth. “I believe in soulmates. But I also believe you can be truly, deeply in love with a person who’s not your soulmate. It doesn’t make them any less important to you and your life.”
Daisy jerked a quick nod, staring determinedly up at the ceiling. “He wasn’t mine,” she said suddenly. “Lincoln. May and Dad already know, but I just…” She trailed off, blinking hard.
Mack nodded slowly. “Maybe he wasn’t. But I knew Lincoln. He was happy with you, and he loved you. In the end, that might matter more than being someone’s soulmate.”
Taking a deep breath, Daisy nodded. “Thanks, Mack.”
“Any time, Tremors.”
They dropped into silence after that, until Mack heard someone knock on the office door. “Hey, Mack!”
Mack felt a smile crossing his face as he moved from behind the car to see Elena strolling towards him, hands in her pockets. “Hey, Yo-Yo,” he said, and Elena returned the smile.
“You know, the nickname is growing on me, Turtleman.” Turning her gaze to the car behind him, she said, “So? Do you have good news for me?”
“I do,” Mack said, patting the side of her car. “After almost a month of work, I finally finished it. Your car is finally fixed.”
A grin flashed across Elena’s face. “About time-- but thank you. I owe you. Literally and figuratively. I probably owe you for all that coffee you bought me.”
Waving a hand, Mack said, “Don’t worry about it. I was happy to do it.” He paused, the reality of it finally hitting him. If his work was finished… he wouldn’t be seeing Elena again.
No sense in moping about it, he told himself sternly. Grabbing the keys from the table next to him, he dropped them in Elena’s outstretched hand. “All yours,” he told her.
Elena nodded, stuffing the keys in her pocket. “Thanks, Mack.” She paused for a second, then extended a hand to shake.
Mack blinked in surprise-- he hadn’t expected such a formal goodbye. But he went to shake her hand, and it was only as his fingers were curling around hers that he noticed the dark blue soulmark on her palm.
A flash of light radiated from their hands, and Mack felt himself transported away from the garage:
He was sitting on the couch in his apartment, leaning back and relaxing. He could hear voices in the kitchen-- a man’s baritone, and Daisy laughing-- and music was emanating from a radio a little ways away.
A soft noise from next to him caught his attention, and he glanced over to see Elena, curled up next to him, her head resting on his chest as she hummed along to the song. Mack wrapped an arm around her and dropped a kiss onto her forehead, and she let out a soft noise. “Te amo,” she whispered, and Mack felt a smile pull at the corner of his mouth.
“Love you back,” he said as a wave of contentment swept over him.
Mack’s eyes snapped open and caught hold of Elena’s. To his shock, a slow smile was spreading across her face. “I knew it,” she said.
“Oh, you knew it?” Mack said, trying to steady his voice. “How exactly did you know it?”
“You’ve got your mark on your hand, too,” she said with a shrug. “Other than that… put it together, Turtleman. I wasn’t just hanging around here waiting for my car. Well, other than the first time.”
Mack felt a smile start to grow on his own face, and then another voice broke through his thoughts.
“Holy. Crap.”
Both of them looked at where Daisy was still lounging in her dad’s car, her eyes wide and a huge grin on her face. “This is awesome,” she said.
Mack exchanged a look with Elena. “I’ll call you?” he offered, and Elena snorted.
“Knowing you? I’ll call you first, Turtleman.” Shooting him a wink, she turned and strolled out of the garage, a spring in her step. For a long minute, Mack watched her, feeling himself grinning like an idiot. Then he turned back to his work, making a mental note to learn Spanish.
#alphonso mack mackenzie#alphonso mackenzie#elena rodriguez#yo yo rodriguez#mackelena#daisy johnson#phil coulson#melinda may#bobbi morse#lance hunter#agents of s.h.i.e.l.d#aos#aos fanfic#111 followers celebration#it was dope. the end
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one night stand au for the ask game! (if ur still playing lols)
Yes I most definitely am! (Sorry this took us a sec, I had to consult with my better half 💕 )
This one has been unintentionally underwraps for months, but we work on it pretty much every night. This is a HotchReid roleplay fic, set in an AU where Reid doesn't join the BAU until season 3. And ends up meeting/sleeping with Hotch literally the night before his first day. But they don't know they will be working together when they do, not until Reid is walking into Hotch's office the next morning. And as hard as they try to have that be the end of it -- Hotch is his boss after all, they just can't be doing this -- they find themselves breaking the rules they set down for themselves. Again, and again, and again.
There's so much sex in this, we've already written at least 250k words and we're still going. It's so good. But it is... a lot of sex.
The lovely @spencehotchner writes for Hotch, and I'm writing for Spencer.
With +250k in my docs I feel like I kind of have to include a snippet, so it's below the cut. It's safe for work, sorry folks, just super long. Because I ramble like a mofo so my entries are so, so long. We still need to edit/beta everything but we do plan to post it at some point. Some day. It's too good to keep to ourselves.
--
Aaron smiles up at him goofily as Spencer tugs him up. "Mm, I'm coming, I'm coming." He scrambles up and follows him.
He would make breakfast if he could. He would make it so good, and kiss Spencer over coffee, and get to know him all day. He’d ask all the questions he wants to ask-- what makes him tick. What puts that beautiful smile on his face. What makes his brain whir, and his heart spin, and his body go electric. He wants to know all of the things that turn Spencer on, even outside of sex. He wants to know what he wakes up for in the morning. What he tastes like after a good cup of coffee.
Fuck work.
"What time do you get off work?" he asks.
Spencer turns to him, eyes wide and... hopeful. Fuck. Aaron is watching him, with this content and appraising look, like he's thinking of things they don't have time for -- not just the sexy things, but other things. He'd said something about coffee the night before, and for the first time since Spencer got word he'd been offered the position at the BAU, he really wished he didn't have to start today. He'd been looking forward to it for weeks.
But all he wants right now is to drink coffee with Aaron in his kitchen.
"Um, well -- first day and all. New team, new boss. Usually I'm nine to five, normal hours, but I don't know how late I'll be there or... if I'll be off early," he glances at Aaron from beneath his lashes, fingers still tangled together, shower beating against the tile behind them and steaming up the room. He pulls the man with him beneath the spray, straight into a kiss that's wet and slick as the shower warms them and sluices down their skin.
He tries to pretend he isn't still shaking a little, aftershock tremors of their morning sex, and nerves about what Aaron is going to ask him. If he's going to ask him.
"Did you have something in mind?" he dares to ask, and it's quiet and barely heard over the shower, but Spencer does ask it. He's proud of himself for that. The affect Aaron is already having on him is palpable, and Spencer likes it -- likes the way Aaron makes him feel. In general, and about himself.
Aaron hums, placing a small kiss on his lips, hiding a smile. "Yeah, well. There's this thing called dinner that people often do at night. I was planning on having it. Was wondering if you'd maybe join me."
It’s not subtle, not in the slightest, but Aaron is through with subtle for the moment. He’s ready to lay it out on the line, here. I want you, I know you want me.
Spencer's heart is about to beat out of his throat, and he smiles so wide he's all teeth and upturned lips and a deluge of pecks to Aaron's own smile that he tries to hide from him. They're basically the same height, the man can't hide a thing from Spencer when they are pressed this close.
"I'd love to," he beams, kissing him again a little deeper, a little more playful, and he's going to make them both late at this rate. But God, does Spencer love kissing Aaron. "I'd love nothing more."
Aaron smiles, pinching his side playfully. "Yeah? Well, I guess that means I'll have to get your number."
Aaron can imagine it now-- being on a case, seeing Spencer’s number on the device in his hand as he texts him good night. Them talking throughout the day today, in the future, little check ins on each other, because Aaron is sure he’s not going to be able to get this boy off his mind. It’ll be a struggle to do anything but text him all day.
He runs a hand through Spencer’s wet curls, playing with the ends of the strands, trying to memorize the way the shower’s steam paints a blush on Spencer’s cheekbones. Watercolor. Aaron could see him as a work of art.
God, he had to be crazy. But going home at night with a random stranger was crazy for him. Standing in his shower the next morning was crazy for him. Asking for his number was crazy for him.
Crazy felt good.
"Play your cards right, you might even get my last name," Spencer says cheekily, giggling and dodging out of the way as Aaron tries to pinch his side again.
But he's... so happy, so delirious with it, that nothing could ruin his day now. Because he was going to have dinner with Aaron after his first day at work for the BAU, which he'd been dreaming about since Jason Gideon used it a lure to recruit him into the FBI just after his second Ph.D.
For the first time, in a long time, his life felt pretty perfect.
Aaron grins and steals another long, slow kiss from him, feeling light and airy and good.
Fucking hell, does he feel good.
They get out of the shower and Aaron dresses as quickly as he can, because he really does need to go. As soon as he's dressed, though, he's pulling a half dressed Spencer into his arms to kiss him again.
Spencer manages to get into briefs and slacks and is trying to color coordinate some kind of dress shirt and sweater combination with a tie (literally everything is clean, this shouldn't be this hard) when Aaron is there pulling him into a searing kiss. Still damp from the shower, dressed in his clothes from last night, smiling against his mouth and Spencer can't help how he huffs out a laugh and kisses back with just as much enthusiasm.
He really didn't want the man to go. But it was quickly approaching 7:00a.m. and D.C. traffic had to be hell, even with a cab. Spencer had always taken the train when he was at MIT, the East coast had a well established system. So he'd decided the week prior he would just do the same here and save himself the daily morning anxiety attack of trying to make it to work on time on his own. That's what public transportation was for. Regulated, mass transit. Set arrival and departure times. A soothing balm if there ever was one.
"Give me your phone," he says with a smile, still so close he basically speaks against Aaron's mouth. He takes the offered iPhone and puts his number in under his name, just his first name. Ready to make the man earn the rest of his personal information.
Maybe, if dinner went well, they'd have... all night to get to know each other. Was it too much to hope Aaron would stay the night again? Probably, but Spencer was in a dreaming mood. Reach for the stars, might as well. With everything going so well, it was only a matter of time before something happened to interfere.
God, he hoped they didn't catch a case on his first day.
Aaron smiles down at the name on his screen. Spencer. He pulls him into one more final kiss, his head spinning pleasantly. There will be more where that came from, he reminds himself. Prays hard in that moment to whoever is listening that he’ll be able to make it to...
"Tonight," he promises. "I'll see you then."
--
The BAU Section Chief, SES Erin Strauss, is the one to greet Spencer when he arrives at the FBI building in Quantico. She's a stern woman, but friendly enough for someone in such a position of authority, and she seems very pleased that Spencer is there to join the team. Calls him 'Dr. Reid' often enough he knows either Gideon or his former team leader had mentioned it was something he was particular about -- or she was more concerned about his appeal politically than what he can do for the team.
He didn't let it sour his mood, though, because the morning had just been... too good to be ruined by something as trivial as that. Spencer had gotten the job, he was there in the building, had just received his badge and his gun and his ID card for the key-padded doors and a whole slew of other orientation day milestones.
And now he was on the seventh floor, about to walk into the Behavior Analysis Unit, where he can see people milling about busy as worker bees and his chest swells with nervousness and excitement and too many emotions to name.
If not for Aaron, and their amazing night and morning together, Spencer would be all nerves and worry -- but the morning sex alone was enough to knock a lot of that tension out of his spine and shoulders. He was ready for today, more ready than he'd ever thought he'd be.
Chief Strauss leads him into the 'bullpen', as she calls it, a lower level agent holding the door open for both of them, and then she's leading him to a cluster of desks that must be part of the new team he's joining.
"Good morning," she says, startling a trio that was talking animatedly over coffee -- and then all eyes are on Spencer. "This is Dr. Spencer Reid, I'm sure you were expecting him. Is Agent Hotchner in, yet?"
The three standing there very obviously fight rolling their eyes, and Spencer gets the feeling it's not about him or his title as 'Dr. Reid' -- or he hopes not anyway. His hopes are confirmed when a pretty, petite blonde smiles sweetly and sincerely at him and introduces herself as "Jennifer Jareau, but call me JJ", the communication liaison for the unit. A position Spencer wasn't aware existed, but he could definitely see the merits of it. Then, she addressed Chief Strauss.
"Hotch is always here by 8:00 a.m." she says, in a way that was somehow not condescending, but probably should have been. "He'll be up in his office waiting for you, ma'am."
"Thank you. Agent Morgan. Agent Prentiss." She nods to the others, and Spencer merely waves and grimaces a smile, wanting to actually introduce himself and hoping the others understand at least a little bit. He isn't sure he can actually say no to the woman who was his boss's boss.
"Erin, are you going to let him meet anyone?" says a voice from above them, just a half a level above the bullpen where offices line the walls -- and it's fucking David Rossi. Standing there, in the flesh, and Spencer is actually a little starstruck. Since when had David Rossi come out of retirement? He knows he's gaping a little bit, mouth parted on a million and one questions to ask the man, but at Chief Strauss's huff of indignation, he lets his jaw snap shut.
Later. He can ask later.
"Is Agent Hotcher ready for Dr. Reid? I'm sure you all have a case to go over," she says in a drone, and Spencer's stomach drops at that. Fuck, he hopes they don't have a case. He... has a date. That would probably be a bad excuse.
"I don't know," David Rossi says in a teasing lilt, then merely turns to the side and speaks into an open office door. "Hotch, you ready for Dr. Reid."
Spencer is blushing down to his roots, and Rossi merely winks at him to show he's joking. Apparently, Chief Strauss was being over the top and not just like this all the time. That kind of makes the situation worse, in his opinion.
Strauss doesn't wait for an answer, and starts up the stairs with Spencer following and trying to get used to the team dynamic. David Rossi actually pats him on the shoulder as he tries to slip by. "Don't worry, he's all bark and only a little bite. And I'm pretty sure he still hasn't read your file yet."
Well, that's not exactly promising.
Aaron still manages to show up about 15 minutes earlier than he had planned on. He had an extra suit at the locker in the office, and just went straight there to get dressed.
Which, of course, meant he had to run into David.
"So," David says, a shit-eating grin on his face. "Someone didn't need a ride home last night."
Aaron keeps his face stoic as he adjusts his tie, sitting down at his desk. "Do you need something, Dave?"
"Who was she?" David just barrels on, raising an eyebrow. "I wasn't under the impression that you were on the prowl last night, but I was apparently wrong."
Aaron stares him down.
"That good, huh?" Dave just grins, and grins and grins, and Aaron doesn't let the fact that he's had the most amazing morning in years show through on his face. Nothing can take away the fact that, on his phone, there's a number with the name Spencer beside it.
"I'm an adult," Aaron says, simple as that. "Now, can you leave? I still have to go over the--"
"Oh, he's here!" Dave says, looking out the door. Aaron's blinds are closed, and he raises an eyebrow. "Oh, he's young. Erin are you going to let him meet anyone?" David says as he steps out of the door.
Aaron laughs to himself, straightens his tie again, prepares himself to meet the newest team member. He hopes whoever this is will be good for him-- good for the team. He's nervous. He loves his team, thinks they have a great dynamic. Change is... different. After Elle had left, things had been rocky. No one could replace her, but this new kid was supposed to be something special.
Aaron would just have to see about that.
"Come in," he says, busying himself with some files to look like he isn't anticipating the worst, when a knock rasps at his door.
Chief Strauss knocks at the Unit Chief's door, the team leader that Spencer would be directly under for the foreseeable future, and just walks on in -- in fact, the knock seems a little last second. Like she doesn't usually announce herself when she comes in, and is on her best behavior in front of Spencer.
He's not sure why, it's not like he wouldn't find out how everything works around here eventually. He isn't going anywhere.
"Aar- ahem, Agent Hotchner," again, with the hesitation, acting formal. Spencer looks around the dark wooded office lined with books on Law and sadism and serial killers alike, until he turns to the desk against the wall. "This is Dr. Spencer Reid, your newest team member."
Sitting there is a man in a dark suit, broad shouldered, black hair, bent over some files spread on his desk and seemingly very intent on his work. Finishing whatever he was making note of before looking up at them.
Dark eyes. Darker lashes. Tunnel vision stare that pierces through Spencer, and all the breath escapes his lungs.
No.
Strauss turns back to him with a tight, friendly smile; unaware of the bomb that has just gone off inside Spencer's head.
"Dr. Reid, meet your new Unit Chief: Supervisory Special Agent, Aaron Hotchner."
#god please let this formatting work#everyone form a prayer circle that this super duper long snippet isn't all out of order#did i need to post a 2k snippet?#no i did not#but i wanted to because i love this rp so damn much#this is unedited and subject to change but i honestly feel like it's perfect#asks#ask game#HotchReid#Heid#katyswriting
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let me kiss you
navi/masterlist
pairing: hongjoong x reader
genre: angst, fluff; requested!
word count: 1.9k
warnings: language, insecurities
if it’s not too much to ask, can i request for one when the reader’s ex is a member of ATEEZ right now?
a/n: here you go again dear anon i hope this one is to your liking!!
this was… uncomfortable, to say the least. you’d met hongjoong out of the idol context, and while you did care a lot about him and his work and while you did know the names of the other members, for some reason you’d managed to miss that one of them was your ex. and not just anyone, no, it was seonghwa, the one your love told you the most about, his best friend, and now you had to pretend nothing was wrong while he kept excitedly telling you about how he’d love for you to meet them, his friends, his family, how he’d love if you finally got to spend time with all of them now that his company had given their okay. you’d have to ruin things because the drama of having one of the boys be your ex had the chance to ruin their career when it had just started, and you couldn’t do that. you couldn’t do that to hongjoong, not after he’d worked so hard, and you couldn’t do it to the other boys, either. they deserved better than for your past relationships to mess up their future. especially when you didn’t even harbour any hard feelings towards seonghwa - it just hadn’t worked out, but that was how it often went with teen romances, they ended because neither was really ready for the commitment yet. now you were ready, but you also knew you couldn’t act like you didn’t know seonghwa, and you knew fans could be desperate to figure out anything at all relating to their bias’ past. having dated seonghwa and now dating hongjoong was definitely not something that would stay hidden, nor was it something that wouldn’t be able to ruin their careers. you’d be seen as a slut, and while you were okay with that image because you didn’t have much to lose in that regard, because you weren’t famous, you couldn’t do it to hongjoong. you couldn’t have your bad image taint him. so, instead of being happy, you decided right there that you couldn’t be with him, that you had to end it before you were made public, that you had to end it before it was too late.
“joong”, you started, then corrected yourself. “hongjoong…”, and latest now did he know that something was wrong. he hoped he was mistaken, though, pretended he hadn’t heard the tone in your voice that left him scared of your next words.
“hm?”
“i don’t want to meet the boys. i don’t want to meet any of you. i don’t want to meet you anymore, either.”
it was so hard to get these words out, but you knew you had to. you knew you couldn’t ruin your love’s future because of a stupid teen romance with his best friend. you couldn’t do that to him, you’d rather break his heart and leave it for someone else to mend than ruin his entire future.
“what do you mean? how are we gonna do things if we won’t meet?”, confused, desperate to hear that this was just a joke, but it wasn’t, it sadly wasn’t.
“we’re not going to do anything. we’re breaking up, hongjoong.”
“something happened. i know something happened and you’re not telling me what it is, but please don’t do this.”
it hurt so much to see him like this, begging you to not leave him, begging you to not do this to him when you’d worked so hard to get where you were. but it had only been two months since you met, you’d been dating for about one now, and you were certain it would be easier for him to get over losing you than over losing his future. you couldn’t imagine he really already cared so much about you.
“nothing happened. it’s just not right for me, this whole… idol life. it doesn’t fit.”
you hated to say this. you hated to use this against him. you knew he was scared he wouldn’t find anyone that was willing to accept the fact that he was an idol, and you’d promised him you’d make it work, but you couldn’t possibly tell him that you were breaking up to keep his dream alive. he wouldn’t let you do that.
“okay”, resigned, head hanging low because he couldn’t argue against that, deep down he’d known he wouldn’t be able to find real love as an idol, he wouldn’t be able to find someone that was willing to stay with him and accept this kind of life, so even though it hurt he knew he had to let you go. he had to let you go because he couldn’t hurt you, and you were letting him go because you didn’t want to hurt him. so instead of spending the night cuddled up and excited to meet his friends, he spent the night at the dorm crying and thinking and trying to make a decision, one you hadn’t anticipated.
when you found out two days later that ateez was taking a hiatus due to their leader having a health condition that left him unable to support the group right now and had him needing to focus on his recovery, you didn’t think much of it. heartbreak hurt, but he would be okay.
but this condition lasted for several weeks, and you were starting to worry, just like the fans that were scared ateez was going to disband because they couldn’t work without hongjoong. and because you were no stranger to the fan spaces you saw all these rumours, saw leaked snippets of conversations that might be fake but might be real, and you texted a number you could only hope was still in use: seonghwa.
[y/n]: this is y/n, remember me?
[seonghwa]: why are you texting me? we haven’t talked in years
[y/n]: that’s why. what has hongjoong told you about this hiatus, because i know why it is
[seonghwa]: how would you know?? i wouldn’t have thought you’d be one of those stalker fans
[y/n]: would you believe me if i tell you i dated hongjoong and broke up w him shortly before
silence for a few seconds, then he started typing again.
[seonghwa]: so you’re his girlfriend
[y/n]: was. i can’t do that to the group if someone finds out we dated and now i’d be with hongjoong and i just don’t think it’d go well
that finally explained things, explained why you’d broken up without a reason hongjoong knew, explained why it all came so suddenly for his friend.
[seonghwa]: talk to him. don’t make this decision for him, for all of us. come over and let’s talk
and though you didn’t want to you agreed, going to the address seonghwa told you on the phone - he didn’t want to text it just in case -, being let in by a very exhausted seonghwa as you followed him to their dorm’s common area.
“who’s that?”, another boy asked, and now you had everyone’s attention, looking like a whole mess because you’d been crying near nonstop, too, because hongjoong hadn’t been the only one affected; knowing you had to do this didn’t make doing it any easier.
“y/n.”
hongjoong seemed shocked to see you, probably was shocked to see you, and then the others seemed to understand.
“what are you doing here?”, your ex-boyfriend then asked, looking from you to how you were half hiding behind your other ex-boyfriend, curious and hurt.
“seonghwa asked me to come”, though this answer didn’t make anything clearer to the boy you still loved.
“how did he ask you to come? how does he have your number?”
“that’s the thing. can we talk, joong? in private.”
everyone’s eyes were on you as you left the room, curious and worried because they knew you’d really affected their leader.
“what’s up? why are you here?”
he sounded cold and hurt and you hated it, hated it more than anything that you were the reason for him sounding like that.
“i don’t care about your idol life. i lied to you and i’m sorry but please don’t ruin your future because of this.”
“then what is it? why’d you leave? why’d you break up? if it’s being an idol then i don’t want it, i don’t want to have to give up on everything just because of this. i’ve been thinking about disbanding because it’s just not worth it if it ruins everything else for me.”
“no, joong, don’t, please”, almost crying, much like the man in front of you, “i just wanted to protect you and your future and your members and i didn’t want to be the reason why everyone hates you.”
“explain, please explain”, because your words didn’t exactly make a lot of sense yet - the company had agreed that there was nothing about you to worry about, nothing they’d maybe need to hide or take care of.
“it’s seonghwa. i used to be with him, in school, and we didn’t end on bad terms but i’m so scared people will say i’m just collecting member after member or something and then i’ll ruin your career and-”
“let me kiss you”, he interrupted. he wanted nothing more in that moment than to kiss you, but he didn’t want to do it in case your feelings for him had left, so he asked instead, making sure it was okay.
“okay”, and he didn’t need more before his lips were on yours, soft lips but a desperate kiss, swallowing the sobs that were now starting to escape your throat but breaking away as soon as he noticed, pulling you into his arms instead.
“y/n…”, he started, holding you tightly, “y/n. my y/n”, continuing until you’d calmed down a little before he spoke up again.
“everyone’s had high school romances. or, most people. you didn’t even know he’d be an idol yet, or in my group. how would anyone use that against you? how would anyone blame you for that when you didn’t know anything about it, hm?”, trying to comfort you even though he wanted nothing more than to cry himself.
“i just don’t want to ruin what you’ve all worked so hard for”, you admitted, though you were clinging to him as if your life depended on it.
“you’re not ruining anything, i promise. if that ruins things then let’s ruin things. it’s not worth it if i can’t be happy.”
“no, joong, don’t, don’t risk things, not for me, don’t-”
but again he interrupted you.
“you saw what not being with you did, what the thought of never having someone who could stand being with me despite my job did. don’t think that i’d give up on the person that wants to be with me despite it all just because you’re a little scared people might not like that you dated my best friend before.”
you nodded against him, trying to accept his words, trying to accept what he told you, and when he felt you relax in his arms he was finally able to relax as well. maybe you’d be with him despite it all. the one person he wanted despite it all.
“we’re trying”, he told you, his forehead against yours and looking you deep in the eyes, “we’re trying.”
“we are”, you confirmed, and his heart did somersaults with happiness.
and because he was tired of crying and being sad, he decided to ask a stupid joke question that you’d never let him live down, teasing him about having a thing for your ex.
“so… is seonghwa a good kisser?”
#ateez#atiny#hongjoong#kim hongjoong#ateez x reader#hongjoong x reader#kim hongjoong x reader#ateez au#ateez angst#ateez fluff#hongjoong au#hongjoong content#hongjoong angst#hongjoong fluff#ateez content#hongjoong imagines#hongjoong timestamps#hongjoong scenarios#ateez imagines#ateez reactions#ateez scenarios#ateez timestamps#seonghwa#yunho#yeosang#san#mingi#wooyoung#jongho#ateez x atiny
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WIP snippet meme thing tagged by @avi17
Tagging @daughterofnero and @heamatic
Post a snippet of a thing you're working on
“Earthrealm’s champion is a mighty warrior,” Raiden observes, wrapping a cloth bandage around Shang Tsung’s right hand and wrist with firm care. His glowing eyes are downcast, watching his work, his mind a million miles away. The sorcerer recognizes the distance and reaches out with his as-yet unwrapped hand to tilt the thunderer’s chin upward so their eyes meet, bright and dark. There is still that old thrill of excitement, meeting those strange eyes and Tsung is surprised by his own enthusiasm. This is why I keep him around, he tells himself, as if in a last-ditch effort to maintain control over his emotions. Raiden, as no one else in his life, has been able to step effortlessly past the walls the sorcerer has built to protect himself—his mind and heart, so damaged and broken from a young life in the gutters of an unforgiving city—to lay hands upon the deepest parts of him. He fears this, loathes it, in a way, because it symbolizes his ultimate weakness, the largest gap in his otherwise impenetrable armor. Yet he, ever at war with himself, loves it, deeply and completely, craving the nakedness such intimacy brings.
[[MORE]]
“I am also a mighty warrior, old friend,” Shang Tsung reminds Raiden, pressing his lips to the corner of the former deity’s mouth. Raiden does not smile and the gesture is, for once, unable to pull him back from his distraction. The sorcerer begins to wonder if the man has not lived these moments before. They have spoken little of Raiden’s life before it became entangled with that of his chosen champion and for many years, that had been just fine, a mystery which would reveal itself or which Shang Tsung would unwrap with great care and gentleness, as he had unwrapped the man’s habit on that fateful night just after he had secured Earthrealm’s safety for ten generations. He of insatiable greed cannot, naturally, hold back that curiosity for eternity and soon he will enquire after it. For now, he supposes, speculation will do.
“And you are fighting on behalf of your Emperor,” says Raiden sourly, knowing what has to happen, what must be done in order for time to continue its course. He has had many conversations with Lord Liu Kang on this exact subject and even a few with Shang Tsung, who, upon meeting Shao Kahn, took an immediate interest, if not an outright liking to him. “His tactics,” the sorcerer had declared, “are far too brutal for someone so old; one might have learned subtlety by now.” But the subtlety had come from somewhere behind the throne—if Quan-Chi’s brand of mad soul sorcery could be called subtle. In other timelines, Raiden reminds himself, he is insidious; now he is a raving zealot with my father’s head whispering blasphemies to him. But he is still dangerous. By winning the Kahn’s favor in the first tournament, Shang Tsung had ousted Quan-Chi as Shao Kahn’s favorite sorcerer; the great Emperor had even granted Tsung the use of Quan-Chi’s flesh pits, an offer Shang Tsung had graciously accepted out of pure, human curiosity.
It is said—in whispers, mind; no one would speak such a thing aloud—that the Kahn’s lovely daughter, Mileena, had been created here, that she is not his flesh and blood, but a copy of the girl Sindel had borne to Jerrod of Edenia. Shang Tsung’s informants had soon given him even more detail about her creation and the reason behind it. “Evidently,” he had told his divine consort one evening as the breeze became chilly off that weird ocean and they lay together under furs, “that mad fool, Quan-Chi, claimed he had the power of something called an Elder God—that he could reverse death. Sindel’s little Kitana was too far gone, they said, and her mind was in shambles. Clever Quan-Chi used his creation, Mileena, to save the Empress and make himself valuable to the great Kahn. How is that for family melodrama?” The power of the Kahn had been such that no one questioned Mileena’s place at his side and her mother, the queen Sindel, had regrettably gone quite mad and so only wanted a daughter to love and dote upon.
“Yes I am, pet, at your suggestion—or have you forgotten?” Shang Tsung’s grip has not relinquished its hold on Raiden’s chin, but he does not pull away.
“No,” he says quietly, “I have not.” Some things, certain events, must happen in order to keep the sands of time from shifting out of control, Raiden reminds himself. Liu Kang had told him that this is one of those events. The new keeper of time, thankfully, is not so cryptic as Raiden’s own, past self—or doomed future self, as time rolls. On the other hand, he is also not dying.
“Do you regret advising me this way?” Shang Tsung’s hand has slid its way around the back of Raiden’s neck under his hair, which is secured with a simple, but pretty hairpin of gold. The sorcerer’s forehead presses forward and their knees touch as he leans into his lover, drawing strength from their proximity. “It is my right to challenge him, as former champion, and as my island sits between all realms, I can ally myself with whomever I choose, can I not?”
“You can,” breathes Raiden, “and his choice of you as his ally and favored sorcerer has angered Quan-Chi, who now seeks to upset the empire of Outworld.”
Shang Tsung does not speak. This is more than Raiden has ever said about his own machinations. The sorcerer is under no impression that his companion is a true fool or simpleton in any way, but his sincerity often gives that impression, so hearing this side of things thrills him. He would take Raiden right here if his match was not coming up shortly. He may still do so; there can be time for them… there is always time for him.
“Even now, in his fury at the affront to him and therefore to his mad, dark god, he is opening a rift between Outworld and…. Elsewhere.” Raiden’s eyes close and he sighs deeply.
“So his dark god… does exist?” Only now does Shang Tsung interpose his voice, so curious is he about the goings-on of the divine aspects of a world which has known few gods. Raiden sighs, shoulders sagging. He signals for his champion’s other hand and it drops gently and obediently from the back of his neck to his lap. Shang Tsung flexes the other one, testing its strength carefully, drawing away from Raiden to sit up straight and regard him intently.
“Yes,” Raiden says eventually, “he is—a remnant of a… dead timeline.”
Shang Tsung feels his heart beat a little more quickly then. Timelines and worlds apart from his own—what riches and knowledge such a thing must hold. But dead? How can a timeline die? How can a world die? Aside from merging with another, a realm can never cease to exist, can it? He makes a mental note to check his library for any old texts which might hint at such a thing, though he is fairly certain if he possessed such a tome, he would remember it.
“And this rift?”
“Could be disastrous for Outworld, but its opening will ensure the Shokan people never ally with Shao Kahn, forcing him to rely upon the Tarkatan tribes as his foot soldiers. They are mighty and many, but…”
The lack of prince Goro in the next tournament ensures long life for Kung Lao, the soft-spoken, humble choice of Lord Liu Kang. A Tarkatan champion might be a worthy foe, but they, at least, only have two arms apiece. This shifts the sands of time, but not beyond Lord Liu Kang’s ken and control. Shang Tsung still fights for Outworld and Kung Lao still faces him. “And if the Tarkatan are allied to the throne of Outworld, the Osh-Tekk will not be; that is an old feud, and a bloody one.”
“So, my sweet, gentle emissary has a few schemes in him, does he?” Shang Tsung’s voice is a purr as Raiden passively finishes wrapping his hand and wrist.
“A few,” Raiden agrees.
“You are destabilizing an entire realm, o’ exquisite one,” continues the sorcerer. “I admire your ruthlessness.”
Raiden looks up and their eyes meet. Shang Tsung is hungry, his gaze roaming over the thunderer as if the man were utterly naked before him. Raiden knows Kung Lao will win—he must, for the sake of the timeline—and knows he will spare Shang Tsung which, in another life, embitters him and sends him limping foolishly back to a pitiless ruler who punishes his failure. This, Raiden knows, is something Quan-Chi would love to see, though the Netherrealm sorcerer’s mind is currently elsewhere. Shang Tsung is not the only one with informants. This time, however, Shang Tsung will not return to Shao Kahn, as his servitude is a ruse. Still, Raiden worries…
That worry presently evaporates as Shang Tsung’s oh-so-clever hands find his thighs beneath the layers of cloth which conceal them and push them gently apart. He is seated on an ornate bench of dark, carved wood, inlaid with mother-of-pearl and shaped with sensual elegance. It is an ideal place for someone as beautiful as Raiden to be seated—or so Shang Tsung opines. The cushion beneath him is comfortable, the best there is, and it supports him pleasantly as his former student drops to his knees between great, powerful thighs, looking up with glittering, obsidian eyes, asking only the permission of the deity-who-was.
“I would offer more,” Shang Tsung asserts with the weight of years and complete devotion dripping honey over every word, “but…” His eyes dart minutely to the door which will lead out and down to the arena for Final Kombat. His look flashes annoyance, as if the event were a mere inconvenience. Right now, it is, of course, and will be treated as such.
Raiden can feel his pulse rising, core beating hard in his broad chest, and a gentle flush of red-gold crossing fine-boned features. A distant rumble of thunder from an unexpected storm whispers of deep, aching desire, but the sorcerer awaits Raiden’s express permission. Coercion will simply not do.
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LMAOO ITS DONE anyways here have this out of context text snippet and let ur imgination run wild
Narrow Escapes and Fresh Starts
George fell back against the cold brick alleyway wall in exhaustion, slowly sliding down to sit next to the tall man already on the floor. Out of breath, he looked over to the taller male, who seemed to be completely calm, despite the fact they had only narrowly been able to escape a swarm of the hideous, infected creatures chasing after them.
"How are you so chill?! We almost fucking died, just in case you forgot!" George shrieked, out of shock and almost jealousy that the man next to him was so relaxed.
The taller male lazily searched though his dirt covered, worn down grey bag and pulled out two bottles of water. He threw one into the lap of the smaller man next to him.
"Drink up, fella, we ran a long way and you look exhausted. Oh, and keep your voice down. They might be able to hear us."
George stared at him for a bit in confusion, before he picked up the water bottle, sat the it beside him and attempted to get more information out of this man.
"Who are you, anyways? You scared the shit outta me when you just came out of nowhere, grabbed my wrist and started running.." George pressed on, desperate to know who the fuck this guy was.
"Name's Will, I think, and I've been running away from those creatures presumably longer than you have, judging by the way I had to save you from that swarm." The taller man replied.
"You didn't save me, I easily could've outran those things by myself!" George exclaimed in an offended tone. "And what do you mean you think your name is Will? Surely you would know your own name?"
"Well I'm sorry, but everyone in the country has had their memories completely wiped. I'm lucky I even remember my name. And anyways, if you're so smart, do you even remember your name?"
"Yeah, 'course, I'm not thick."
"Well what is it then?"
"George."
"Shit name, that is," Will muttered, but loud enough for George to hear.
"Says you! You have one of the most basic names in existence!" George shot back.
"I just saved your life, mate, shut up!"
"Why are we even arguing about this anyways?" George questioned, with hints of frustration in his voice. "As if our names are the most concerning thing right now.."
"I don't know. I'm kinda just looking for shit to say, really." Will replied.
The two sat in silence for a solid twenty minutes, unsure of what to say or do. What were the going to do? Where were they going to go? What would be in store for them in this dystopian future? Would they ever see each other again?
"So," George started, "what now?"
"I don't know," Will said rather blankly.
"Oh.."
"You met anyone else around here before me?"
George's face morphed into a sad expression at the question. He hesitated a bit before he answered.
"Yeah," George replied a little sadly. It had been a while since he had seen a friendly face. Or a human face, really. "I met this Welsh girl called Becky and we kinda stuck together for a while, but we ran into a swarm of the creatures and I lost her in the crossfire."
"Oh, mad. Ya reckon she's still alive or..?" Will asked quietly. He wondered if they were close before she got lost.
"I don't know man... I hope so," George mumbled, his voice cracking slightly. Tears collected at the corner of his eyes. Will noticed this and shuffled closer to George.
"I'm guessing you guys were pretty close then, huh?"
"You could say that."
"She meant a lot to you?"
"Kinda, yeah.." A singular tear rolled down George's cheek silently, rolling off the edge of his face and spashing on his pale arm. More tears came down and soon enough he was silently sobbing next to Will. Unsure of what to do, the taller put an arm around George's shoulders, trying to comfort the crying boy.
"Miss 'er, Will," The shorter male mumbled.
"We'll find her, George. It'll be fine."
Will wasn't sure why he felt so bad for this stranger he had only met an hour ago. Maybe it was because George seemed sort of.. pitiful to him? He didn't quite know, but he planned to stick with him regardless.
He didn't know what it was, but Will had a feeling that it would be a good idea for them to stick together.
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Sooooooo…. how about that Halloween wedding? 👀👀👀 or maybe even the bachelorette party??? 👀👀👀 or…. Both?
The actual wedding is gonna be a few chapters long so here's a little snippet of the night before the Jerena wedding. Again, sorry my drabbles aren't drabbles hahaha
“I can’t do this” and “We need to talk” were two text messages Jamie never expected to receive from Serena the night before their wedding. Every worst case scenario was running through her head and her worries were further exacerbated when Serena wouldn’t answer her phone. Mrs. Benson and Mrs. Castillo instilled in them that it was bad luck to see each other the night before the wedding, so that’s how Jamie found herself sharing a suite at The Beverly Hills Hotel with her Best Man instead of holding Serena and easing her worries like she wanted to be.
An hour had passed from when she received the text messages from Serena to when she heard the sound of someone knocking on her door. She opened it to find Serena standing there in leggings and one of Jamie’s hoodies; her eyes red and puffy from crying. Before she could get a word out, Serena wrapped her arms around her waist and nuzzled into her.
“Jay, can we get out of here?”
“But it’s bad luck to see each other the night before our wedding,” she told Serena although she knew there was no way she would abide by that superstition after seeing her future wife’s sad eyes.
She’d have done anything for Serena and that moment was no different. What Serena had in mind, she wasn’t sure, but the last thing Jamie expected was to end up in the backyard of the Benson house on the playground Serena and her siblings played on when they were children and when they were incredibly wasted as adults.
They sat down on the swings and, not wanting to pry, Jamie waited on Serena to offer as much or as little information to her about how she was feeling.
“I love you, Jamie, and I want to be your wife more than I’ve ever wanted anything,” Serena reassured her. “I’m just scared. Our wedding turned into something bigger than we wanted it to be and you know I lose my confidence in large groups. When I’m in the classroom, I’m in my element. I’m confident. I’m poised. Outside of the classroom, that fades away. I’m going to be emotional when I say my vows and I’m going to be vulnerable. I don’t want to feel that way in front of so many people.”
Jamie reached out for her hand. “When we say our vows, we’ll be looking at each other. We can pretend it’s just the two of us. Besides, I’m going to be so caught up in how beautiful you’re going to look in your dress that I’ll probably even forget what I’m going to say. I’m setting you up for comedic gold, Ser. One thing I realized, though, is that weddings are never for the couple getting married. Ours is no exception. Tomorrow is for your mom to get emotional when she helps you get ready, for your sister to feel like she has authority because she’s Maid of Honor, and for your dad to beam with pride when he walks you down the aisle. Our wedding day is for our friends and family to enjoy, so let’s just try to enjoy it with them. You’ll even get to see Ollie in her little tux.”
“My baby,” Serena leaned her face against the chain on the swing. “My hormonal baby. She’s excited to see Alex in her Junior Bridesmaid dress. Oh, god. Now I’m thinking about the possibility of being at their wedding in ten years.”
“Okay, bad idea. Don’t think about Ollie in her tux,” Jamie squeezed her hand. “Think about the Halloween theme. Our moms let you get away with Ouija board print invitations, there’s going to be autumn Sangria, and the kids’ section is going to have a pumpkin decorating station. Who, more than anyone in the entire world, likes pumpkins and Sangria?”
“I like pumpkins and Sangria,” Serena said softly.
“Are you sure?” Jamie teased. “Doesn’t sound like it.”
“I like pumpkins and Sangria!” Serena nearly shouted.
“That’s my girl.”
Serena smiled for the first time that night. “I guess you’re right. I just had to get all of this out of my system. That and I missed you, but don’t let it go to your head and start thinking I can’t go a single night without you.”
“You can’t,” Jamie laughed. “I think tonight proves it. Just think, in two days, we’ll be on our honeymoon and we’ll have an entire week for just the two of us. I have some surprises lined up for you that you’re going to like.”
“Do these surprises involve you railing me on every surface of the cabin? If so, I’m a very willing participant.”
“Serena!” Jamie was taken aback even if she was intrigued by the idea. “I mean, yeah, we can do that, but there were a few places I wanted to take you on the drive over there.”
Serena let go of her hand so she could start swinging herself on the swing. “Me, too. There’s a place Kyle, Lexie, and I used to go to when-”
“I’m gonna stop you right there,” Jamie interrupted her. “I love you, Serena. You know you’re the light of my life and the woman of my dreams. But I swear if you take me to any Blair Witch style house deep in the woods, I’m getting an annulment.”
“Well, according to you and our moms, our marriage is already doomed because we’re seeing each other the night before our wedding,” Serena said as she continued to swing. “We might as well have some fun before the annulment.”
Jamie looked at her soon-to-be wife swinging higher and higher on the swings. She had eased Serena’s worries that night, but the more Serena continued to swing, the more Jamie felt as if what she had done was just a temporary fix. Underneath the poised and sophisticated exterior she showed the public, she was still that scared little girl trying to heal from a childhood that took her confidence away.
Serena stopped swinging and Jamie saw the pleading look in her eyes. “Jay, will you hold me tonight?”
“Tonight and every night for the rest of our lives, Ser.”
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Found (Chapter 3) - Morisawa Chiaki/Reader
Summary: Chiaki can vaguely remember that time in kindergarten when he saved a girl during a school field trip but he knows that it was the first time he became someone’s hero. With only a dolphin plush and a worn-out handkerchief to remind him of that memory, he finally meets her again.
A/N: A lot of IRL stuff happened which caused the delay of this update but here it is~ Hope you enjoy and please look forward to the next and final chapter~!
Chapter 3: A Snippet of the Past
-
It seems like today is his lucky day as Chiaki is called up on stage by the emcee, his smile couldn’t be any wider as he joins the other kid next to the sea lion. The next bit of the show was to have volunteers from the audience play some tricks with the aquatic animal.
He was waving excitedly to his mom from the audience seats when he heard a scream followed by a splash of water.
The crowd was in panic as the girl was pulled underwater, the emcee calling for a lifeguard through the microphone and the girl’s classmates shouting at her. Chiaki is stunned as well. One second she was just standing next to him and the next she’s gone.
But he was moving before he even registered what he’s about to do and jumped into the water, the worried voice of the emcee fading as he tried to swim deeper into the water to reach the drowning girl.
‘Heroes have these kinds of moments too, huh? Suddenly rushing in to help without giving it any thought.’, he thinks to himself, stretching his arm long enough to grab hold of the girl. With the sudden charge into the water, however, Chiaki didn’t have a chance to take a deep breath so he was struggling to pull themselves above water before he ran out of breath.
But he couldn’t hold it any longer. He lets out air from his mouth, bubbles escaping and making their way upwards, and started to inhale water. It was painful. Despite that, he kept a firm hold of the girl’s arm. Judging by the ease of pulling her towards him, the animal must’ve let her go.
However it was too late, as Chiaki’s senses were fading and his grip started to loosen.
It was the aquarium staff who ultimately saved both children, pulling them out as quickly as they could. Thankfully, they were able to regain consciousness after receiving first aid, and their worried parents rushed in.
As his mother was patting his head in relief, Chiaki looked over to the girl who was fighting the tears in her eyes, telling her mom how scared she was and the older woman comforting her. She seemed okay physically, at least.
They were led to the infirmary for a quick check-up, and after confirming that both didn’t sustain any injuries were taken to the souvenir shop to get some dry clothes.
--
Chiaki feels a tug on his shirt and turns around to see the girl in a fresh new set of clothes bought from the shop. She was fidgeting with her fingers before shyly meeting his eyes.
“Mommy said I should always thank people who help me… so… thank you very much for saving me!” She bows her head and Chiaki is at a loss for words.
“No, no. It wasn’t really me who saved you.” The young boy quickly denies despite the warm feeling her words brought him. He felt like he didn’t deserve the gratitude. He did almost drown with her after recklessly jumping in after her.
She shakes her head. “I already thanked the nice adults earlier. But you were the one who tried to save me first, right? So, thank you!” She insists and bows her head again. The sincerity of her voice made the young boy give up any more argument and accept her gratitude. He smiles in reply.
“A hero never hesitates when there are people in need, after all.”
Chiaki then notices a paper bag beside the girl. It was the same size as the one he has after purchasing a souvenir from the shop. “Did you also buy one?” And the girl tilts her head to the side in confusion.
He points to the bag. “A souvenir, I mean.” He clarifies. She turns her attention to the bag and nods.
“Yes. The dolphins from the show were cute”, she reaches inside the bag and reveals a pink stuffed dolphin, “so I want to keep one too!”
Chiaki’s eyes grow wide and opens his own bag. “I also liked the show so I got one too!” A blue stuffed dolphin peeks from inside, the same kind the girl has. The girl gasps in awe and giggles before speaking again. “We match!”
“We do!” And he matches her laughter with one of his own before being interrupted by a sudden sneeze, surprising the both of them.
“Are you okay?” The girl worriedly asks, and Chiaki quickly wipes his nose with his sleeve.
“Y-Yeah, I’m fine! This usually happens when I get a little chilly but it should be fine when we get outside.” He explains. He was never good with changing temperatures to begin with and the air conditioning of the shop was doing more harm than good. They did both just came from the outside stage earlier and that summer heat was no joke. Not to mention them being dripping wet not too long ago.
The girl gives him one more concerned look before patting on the pockets of her skirt. She pulls out a handkerchief. “Here, you can use this. Mommy always makes me carry one.”
Chiaki was hesitant but gave an awkward laugh before taking it. “Thanks! It’s a little embarrassing you had to see that.” He can already feel his cheeks turning red. He should really start bringing a towel of his own in the future. But the girl pays it no mind and says that it didn’t bother her at all.
Before they could start another conversation, a voice calls out and the girl turns around to see her mother waving at her from the entrance. It must be their time to leave.
“Mommy is calling me... I guess it’s time to go home.” She says, a hint of sadness in her voice. The girl didn’t move from her spot and looked down on the floor with a frown. It must be hard to say goodbye to a new friend so early.
A cheerful ‘Well, take care!’ should at least break the silence, Chiaki thought. Though he too didn’t want to part too soon, he knows his mom would be calling for him too. So he puts on a brave smile and steps forward. But just as he was about to open his mouth the girl lifts her head.
“It was nice meeting you! Thank you again for rescuing me!” She spoke with all the appreciation she felt at that moment. “... And I hope we can meet again.” She quickly grabs her paper bag and runs away before Chiaki can even utter a reply. She takes her mother’s waiting hand but before the two exit the shop, she turns around.
“Bye bye, Mr. Hero!”
--
Chiaki lies awake on his bed, his mind still reminiscing the incident from long ago. How could he have forgotten?
He remembers having a field trip when he was younger. A troubled expression of his mother when she realized Chiaki picked up the wrong paper bag from the aquarium shop. And the panic he felt after realizing he and the girl had accidentally swapped bags. He remembers coming down with a fever on that same night.
So that memory wasn’t a fever dream after all?
He sits back up on the bed and reaches for the old paper bag he left by his bedside. A pink dolphin, a handkerchief, and a name. No matter how many times he opens it, nothing changes. He closes his eyes to let it sink in once more.
He was the one who saved her. He was her first hero.
--
After dropping by the ES building for work, Chiaki spends the rest of his free time roaming around ES. He still can’t believe it. Remembering what happened is one thing, but meeting the girl he had saved back then was almost too coincidental that the brunette wonders if there really is some divine being at work here. Or it could also be fate trying to tie them together. Not every person you meet will cross paths with you again, after all.
Maybe this is the universe giving Chiaki an opportunity to give her back her handkerchief. He didn’t really intend to keep it back then, just wipe his nose quickly and then hand it back, but she was gone too soon. The pink dolphin was hers too, so he can give that back as well. But that could mean her giving him the blue one, which was supposed to be his. She had treasured his dolphin for so long and for her to just return it like that, in exchange for a pink dolphin that he didn’t really paid attention to all these years, would be a really disappointing trade.
All he’s thinking right now is if their current relationship would change if he tells her. And if that change would be for the better or for the worse.
Right now, he’s assuming the worst.
He thought a walk would clear his mind of these thoughts, but it only made him think about them more. He needs to find another way to distract himself.
But somehow in his wandering around, he ends up at the front of the cafe. He must’ve navigated there by instinct, though he wasn’t sure if he would call it that considering he was only able to go there twice. Well thrice, if he counted today.
He steps a little to the far side of the road to let the other people walk past. It would look a little suspicious if people saw him just staring at the shop so he takes out his phone and pretends to be texting someone.
He subtly looks up from his phone to see inside the cafe and spots the owner by the counter, picking up the orders to serve. Another female joins her with a tray in hand. That must be the other employee who was sick for the last few days. Well, he’s glad the owner didn’t have to wait tables alone today. Yesterday was a hectic day indeed but today’s atmosphere looks a little calmer, with a manageable amount of customers.
‘There was a festival nearby which would explain why there were a lot more children in the area’, was what the owner told him.
At the thought of what happened the previous day, Chiaki remembers a funny exchange he had with her. He had tried to pay for his order but she insisted it’s on the house, saying that she might still get in trouble for making him work so it’s the least she could do.
“Haha! I told you, you won’t. So it’s okay, really. Let me pay for it.” Chiaki was already reaching for his wallet, taking out some L$ and placing them on the table in front of her
She pushed the money back at him, shaking her head. “Well, then just consider it as payment for helping out. It’s the least I can do.”
“No, no. Just take it. I’m still a customer after all!”
“Usually when someone’s offered something for free they’d gladly take it, you know?”
“And I’m not one who just takes advantage of that and not compensate you properly for your hard work.”
Their exchange went on for a few more minutes until both started laughing at how silly they both are for just a parfait. In the end, they decided to just meet halfway and pay the dessert on a discount.
A small laugh escapes Chiaki’s lips after looking back at the memory and he finally tucks his phone back to his pocket. Maybe he really is just overthinking it all and she’d actually be happy when he tells her. Maybe. He should probably at least tell Kanata or Kaoru about this whole situation. Knowing their thoughts about it would also help him get out of his pessimistic tunnel vision.
Chiaki nods to himself and takes one last glance at the cafe before heading back to the office, now with an objective in mind.
--
this fic is also up on my ao3, @lightspeedrobin , do give me a follow there too if you can~
Ch.2 | Ch.4
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Project Earplugs
Summary: Snippets from The Pogues’ WhatsApp messages.
(Implied future Kie/Pope. Implied future JJ/Reader. This is set in a slight AU – the reader has always been one of the Pogues and none of the events of season 1 have taken place.)
A/N: I’m a long-time fanfic reader, but this is my first attempt at writing it. I’m very new to Tumblr, so I doubt anyone is actually going to see this, but I had fun writing it anyway.
Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the Outer Banks characters or settings.
********************************************************************
The Pogues WhatsApp Group Chat
JJ: I’m ravished. Like, seriously. My stomach just growled so loudly Miss Watts started looking out the window
JJ: So, I’m thinking free food at The Wreck tonight, who’s in??
John B: I don’t think that means what you think it means bro
You: I’m in!
John B: Yeah, me too
JJ: (replying to: “I don’t think that means what you think it means bro”) what??
Kie: Whoa guys
You: Where even are you JJ?
Pope: He means famished.
Pope: Also, I’m in
JJ: Detention
John B: Ah, stealth detention messaging. Nice.
Kie: Seriously, wait a sec guys, I need to check with my dad
You: But Kie… JJ needs shrimp and grits and to be told he’s ravishing!
John B: What was Miss Watts looking for?
JJ: An angry dog, I think.
John B: wtf
JJ: (replying to: “But Kie, JJ needs shrimp and grits and to be told he’s ravishing!”) After a quick google, happy to say I’d be okay with that mate 😉
Pope: Now I’m picturing JJ as the heroine in an old Hollywood black and white…. Someone pass me the brain bleach
You: hahahahaha!
You: Someone needs to Photoshop this!
JJ: I take it back. Just shrimp and grits please
JJ: So, meet at The Wreck in an hour?
John B: Yep
Pope: Cool. See you there.
You: On my way
Kie: Seriously guys, you’re lucky my dad only pretends not to like you. He’s said it’s fine btw. See you soon.
********************************************************************
WhatsApp Chat with JJ
JJ: No
You: (devil face emoji)
JJ: Don’t
You: No promises
You: Grace Kelly?
JJ: Not funny
You: Lana Turner?
JJ :/
JJ: Fine, Audrey Hepburn
You: No way you could pull off Hepburn
JJ: Um, well, Marilyn Monroe then. Final offer
You: Sold
JJ: If I didn’t know you better I might be worried, but I know you’ll never be bothered to actually do this
You: I might surprise you
JJ: Not possible
You: Whatever
You: You out yet?
JJ: Yeah, she just let us go
You: Pick me up on your way?
JJ: Sure mate
You: Woop woop, shrimp awaits!
You: Well played with that btw 😊
JJ: Skill McGill
You: Dork
********************************************************************
Whatsapp Chat with JJ
You: OMG, did you see that?!
JJ: Yeah
You: He’s being really obvious!
You: Why doesn’t Kie notice?!
You: I mean, he’s not being very subtle
JJ: Yeah, they need to bang already
You: Nicely put
You: Do people even say bang anymore?
JJ: I just did, so yeah
You: Seriously, they would be so cute together!
JJ: Agreed.
JJ: Also, the banging. That needs to happen
You: Sigh
********************************************************************
John B created new WhatsApp group
John B added Kie and Pope to new group
John B named new group: “What are they even?!”
John B: They’re side texting again
Kie: Yep, caught that
Pope: What?
Kie: Seriously Pope, how could you miss that?! They’ve been sitting right in front of us all night!
Pope: Yeah, but what’s new?
Pope: Seriously though, isn’t that also what we’re doing right now?
Kie: Touché
John B: Yeah, but this is the first time we have and they literally do it all the time. Also, we waited until we got home to talk about them, we’re not sitting at the same table
Pope: True. But, so what? We all know they’ve got their own little thing going on – the super intense side friendship within the main friendship group.
Kie: Yes, but they should be more than friends! They’re clearly perfect for each other, but they’re both too dumb to see it!
John B: Truer words
Kie: We should help them
Pope: What?
John B: YES!
Kie: Stage 1: We need to get them to realise they have feelings for each other.
Kie: Stage 2: We need to get one of them to make a move.
Pope: But what if they don’t want to jeopardize their friendship?
Kie: Stage 3: We then all need to get earplugs for when we stay over that the Chateau, because the nocturnal noise levels will get ridiculous
John B: Gross. I love it. I’m in.
John B changed the name of the group to “Project Earplugs”
Pope: There are so many variables here that we haven’t though about
John B: Buzz kill
Kie: Come on Pope! It’ll be fun!
John B: Just a little bit of harmless meddling
Kie: Would you feel better if we made you Project Manager?
Pope: Haha, very funny.
Pope: I want veto power
John B: Not if you’re just going to veto everything
Pope: Well, if I make a spreadsheet you’ve both got to listen while I explain it. I think we should properly examine the variables first, our actions could have severe consequences. Then I’ll come up with a few ideas for actioning Stage 1. We should properly discuss the options before we act.
John B: Wow Pope, you’ve just made something fun sound like homework.
Pope: Can’t reply now, spreadsheeting.
********************************************************************
WhatsApp chat between John B and Kie
John B: Project Manager? You’ve created a monster
Kie: He’s just being Pope
John B: OMG, a spreadsheet! Seriously Kie, what have you done?! Haha
Kie: He’s just concerned about his friends. I think it’s sweet.
John B: Okaaaay
********************************************************************
WhatsApp chat between John B and JJ
John B: I get so annoyed when there’s something that needs to be made fun of and you’re not there.
JJ: What are you on about bro?
JJ: You know I’m in the spare room right? Who needs making fun of? You could literally shout it from there and I could hear you
John B: Yeah, never mind
JJ: Whatever dude
********************************************************************
WhatsApp chat between you and JJ
JJ: John B’s being weird
You: huh?
JJ: I think he might have forgotten I was in the house
You: Jeez, what did you walk in on?!
JJ: Nothing like that
JJ: He’s just messaged me about teasing someone and complained I wasn’t there to hear it. Idk what that was about
You: You’re right, weird
JJ: Tbh, didn’t think you’d text back tonight, bit late for you isn’t it? wyd? 😉
You: Mind out of the gutter please
You: Nothing much, just on my laptop proving you wrong
JJ: No
You: Yep. Surprise, surprise!
JJ: No way
You sent a picture file.
You: Night Marilyn 😊
JJ: Oh dear God
#jj maybank#john b routledge#kiara carrera#pope heyward#outer banks#jj/reader#implied future kie/pope#outer banks fic#jj#pope#john b#kie#john b ships jj/reader and kie/pope
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Day 6 of @khoc-week : Life’s Perks
Another writing snippet for today! No spoilers to speak of this time, just a fun little moment between the Destiny gang at the very beginning of Book 2 - Inferno’s Edge...before all the angst really gets going.
As of now I don’t have anything planned for tomorrow’s prompt, so this is probably my last post. Thanks for the fun week, and thank you in particular, Mod Lucky, for all your sweet comments on my posts!
.
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“I bet we've gone way over our normal training time by now.”
I gave a short laugh. “Think maybe Sora will actually be out of bed when we get there this time?”
“I wouldn't count on it. I have a feeling our arrival is the only reason he gets up when he does.”
Shaking my head, I clicked my tongue in disapproval. “Heroes. What are you gonna do with 'em?”
To our surprise, once Riku had rowed us back to the mainland, we found Sora and Kairi both on the beach waiting for us. “There you two are!” Sora exclaimed as we clambered ashore. “You took forever this morning!”
“Obviously even longer than we thought, since you're not only awake, but dressed and out of the house,” I returned. Sora stuck his tongue out at me, and Kairi giggled. I gestured toward the latter. “She woke you up, didn't she?”
“Yep.” She clasped her hands behind her back with a smile. “I woke up and got ready at the normal time, and when I didn't get a text from you I decided to head over to Sora's anyway. After he finished breakfast, and you guys still weren't back, we came down here to wait for you.” She jabbed her thumb in Sora's direction. “He wanted to go over to the play island to find you, but I wouldn't let him. Just in case...you know...you guys needed some alone time.”
I raised one eyebrow at her. “I'm not sure what you're implying, but yeah, we got caught up talking about a bunch of different stuff.”
“Talking, hm?” Kairi smirked mischievously.
Sora had turned and walked past me a couple of steps, and stooped down to pluck a seashell out of the sand. Straightening, he examined it closely. “Thought you guys were supposed to be training, not talking.”
“Oh, trust me, we did that, too,” Riku answered, giving me a knowing look.
Without warning, I threw my arms over Sora's shoulders and collapsed my full weight onto his back. “He tried to kill me, Sora!” I moaned.
“Ugh!” Stumbling forward, Sora dropped the shell in his hand and just barely kept his balance. “What, and now you're passing on the favor to me?”
“I'm so tired...”
Sora must have given Riku a questioning look, because the older boy shrugged. “All I did was teach her Strike Raid.”
“Over and over and over and over...”
“Okay, yeah, I got it.” Sora waved his hands in front of his face to shut me up, and I grinned. Why it was so much fun to annoy him, I wasn't sure. He was kind of like a little brother, I supposed – even though we were technically the same age. One of these days, if we didn't all die of old age first, I was certain that he would end up being my brother-in-law, so the relationship seemed to fit. Future brother-in-law...now there's a title I should use at some point to tease him...or Kairi...or both.
For now, though, I went with a phrase that I knew would immediately perk him up. “I need ice cream.”
“Ooh, that sounds good!” he predictably replied.
Riku wasn't as impressed. “Ice cream? Didn't you two just finish breakfast?”
“Ah, who cares! Come on, let's race to the cart!”
I still had not stopped hanging off of Sora's shoulders, and now took the opportunity to leap up and wrap my legs around his waist. “I'm too tired. Carry me.”
“Wha-?”
“Giddy up.” I kicked at his legs.
“I'm not a horse!”
Laughing, Kairi ran over and jumped onto Riku's back. “I want a ride, too! I haven't had a piggy-back ride in ages!”
Riku groaned, though he was obviously fighting back a smile as he wrapped his arms around Kairi's knees. “She's too tired from training...what's your excuse?”
Kairi set her lips into a pout. “You still owe me for leaving me here alone for a year?”
Though I couldn't blame her for that stance at all, after the discussion I had just had with Riku my heart skipped a beat on his behalf. His face went completely serious for the briefest of moments as something flashed in his eyes, but an instant later he was nodding and jostling his friend up higher on his back.
“Fair enough. Let's go get you kids some ice cream.” He took off at a jog, with Kairi squealing with surprised laughter.
“Hey!” Sora protested, taking a few unsteady steps before breaking into an awkward run himself. I wrapped my arms further around him to keep from being shaken off. “Hey wait!”
“I thought you wanted to race!” Riku threw back over his shoulder.
“Yeah, but...! That was before...!” Sora huffed and grumbled under his breath before shouting again. “This is not a fair race!”
“How is it not fair?” Riku laughed, still way ahead of us. “They're the same exact size!”
“Yeah, but we're not!” Sora shot back.
I slapped him gently on the head. “Aw, stop your complaining before you insult me, and just go catch him! You know you're just as fast as he is.”
A little flattery went a long way with this boy. In an instant, he was grabbing hold of my legs and shifting me into position, and his steps began to quicken. “Yeah, I am. Okay, let's go!”
I let out an unintentional squeak as he broke into a full-on run, all of the bouncing making me start to regret my choices. Soon, though, we started to catch up to Riku and Kairi, and her uncontrollable giggles were infectious. I started laughing, too, and only stopped when we all collapsed into a breathless pile in front of the ice cream cart.
“Let's...not do that...again,” Riku panted.
I nodded. “Yeah. Agreed.”
“It was your idea! And you didn't even do any work!” Sora protested, punching me in the arm.
“Yes, but it was a bad one. I think I might have either brain or spinal damage.”
Kairi shrugged, still smiling. “I had fun.”
Riku and I simultaneously shoved her backwards into the sand.
#khocweek2020#kingdom hearts#kingdom hearts fanfiction#fanfiction#fanfic#writing#writing snippet#original character#kingdom hearts oc#kingdom hearts original character
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2020 SU Fic Sampler - WIP Showcase
So in my continued attempts at distraction, I trawled through my SU fanfic folders, looked at the ol’ endless WIP pile. Figured I’d do a little roundup of some that are in something resembling a decent state. Maybe even see where interest lies and all that, get some attention and validation, you know, all that good stuff one craves. Of course, there’s loads more than this, and I might one day post some things I wrote but never quite managed to finish up, or that got super jossed in ways I couldn’t get myself to work around.
Now, in no particular order, here’s 8 draft snippets totaling almost 6000 words - not very polished, obviously, some quite rough around the edges, some long, some short, some that work better without context than others. But here they are anyway, with an utterly predictable array of focal characters. Any missing segments or my asides/notes in the text are [written like this], because I usually write very non-linearly. Hope you all like mood whiplash!
P.S. I live for comments.
Like Talking To A Wall, aka Bismuth making friends with the wall, statue, and floor Gems. Early precursors to radicalisation and “I would have liberated everyone”, perhaps. Started as one of my first reactions to the Diamond Days episodes.
“Hey, thanks for listening.”
“Anytime. You’re lucky I’m so supportive,” Mica piped up from up on her arch.
Bismuth laughed. Bittersweet. “Yeah. Yeah, I guess I am.”
Then, with a surprisingly gentle hand pressed to the carvings she’d been so careful about, she added a soft: “I’ll miss you.”
“Chin up! It’s gonna be a lovely off-planet adventure for you,” Granite rumbled from just above her head. “A brand new colony! Think of the sights!”
“You can tell us all about it when we see you again.”
Bismuth leaned back, pressing her whole back against the wall, reluctant to leave, even if a snooty shift supervisor was bound to come around and chase her off soon. “Yeah, I’ll make sure to do that.”
They all knew very well that, as always, when the building was done, it was goodbye. The chances of there being a need for repairs or remodelling - and the exact same bismuths being brought in to do them - were incredibly slim.
But pretending was nice, sometimes.
-
Hey, Steven, think I could get a moment before we leave? I won’t be long.
-
They were right where she’d left them, and the years had done very little to change them. A bit of a patina there, some dust, the tiniest bit of wear on sharper corners.
“Bismuth?” Several familiar voices cried out to her in shocked recognition.
She knew she must look a sight - battle-ready and battle-worn, but armour still gleaming, and with a bearing of one who had been through much and was always ready for more. She felt her back had never been so proud and straight, her shoulders so resolutely set.
“I think,” Bismuth grinned, “you’re gonna start seeing changes around these parts.”
---
One for that favourite Pearletariat/Pearl Solidarity fic sub-genre of mine: Clever Pearls Cleverly Getting Around Badly Worded Orders. A bit of an origin for an as-of-yet unnamed pearl OC, because I sure don’t have enough of those!
In the untold thousands of years of Homeworld and Gemkind, and the hundreds of thousands of commands given to hundreds of thousands of pearls, nobody ever thought to Order a pearl not to think. That would imply a they mattered at all, and who would ever put stock in a pearl’s thoughts? Most Gems weren’t sure pearls could think, anyway. I mean, if they could, all that standing around would be intolerable, wouldn’t it? And imagine not being able to say no to anything, even crushing your own gem - shards, at least I’m not a pearl!
They were, occasionally, when dealing with an owner’s important, private, confidential business, Ordered to forget, or, a bit less esoterically, Ordered never to tell.
And [OWNER] has always been all too eager with the Orders. As if she went to bizarre lengths in her thinking that pearl couldn’t - or wouldn’t? - do anything upon merely being told, let alone by herself. Every little thing, from sweeping up the shards of a broken decorative plate to taking down the minutes of an important meeting [OWNER] was presiding over - (im)pressed upon pearl with the crushing weight of an Order.
But she could still think.
Even when Ordered to wait by the door, freezing her limbs and anchoring her legs to the ground with all the force of a starship mooring mechanism. Even when Ordered into silence for days and planetary rotations on end because [OWNER] had wanted to read an important document without being disturbed and it simply didn’t occur to her to lift it when she was done.
In the wake of the Rebellion and the Renegade Pearl, it only gets worse, and soon enough pearl can barely remember the last time a single movement she made was voluntary.
---
SU Future-era Bismuth and Steven convo I scribbled down in between some of these recent eps - after Growing Pains in particular I think - because Bismuth is the absolute pep talk queen.
“You already said you were sorry for trying to kill me in the Forge, and really, it’s okay, it was all a misunderstanding. Besides, it’s more than a lot of people have done!”
Bismuth blinked at the pinkish sheen around Steven’s cheeks, around the downturned brows - strange trick of the light, that. “Steven, come on. Just listen to me for a minute.”
“Okay,” Steven sighed, and leaned against the railing Bismuth had fixed just that morning.
“Point is, for me, the war had never ended. It wasn’t only yesterday, it was today. It was over for everyone, it seemed, except for me. And getting over that, getting used to that, really seeing that as the truth, not living every day buzzed up with that anticipation of the next battle, just waiting for Homeworld to come down hard on us with whatever new horror they’d come up with… that took a while. And it took help.”
[sudden apparent non-sequitur but It’s An Allegory, Steven.]
“When you make a sword, you can’t make it rigid and unyielding. You can’t just temper it into toughness and hardness and make it unbreakable. It needs to have some give in order to be durable, it needs to be able to bend so as not to shatter on impact. And sure, maybe the first parry or strike wouldn’t be the one to do it, but the tenth, the hundreth, the thousandth? Any time you might just find yourself holding on to a hilt with the jagged remnants of everything, and shards scattered on the ground. And if you’re very lucky, that’ll happen during friendly sparring, not in the heat of battle.”
Steven shrugged without response, and seemed to be shrugging off all the words as well. Back to the direct approach it was, then.
“Now you, Steven,” that at least got a bit more attention, “Sure, you can brawl with the best of ‘em, and you put that gem to damn good use. You’ve got great technique drilled in, too - I’d expect nothing less from one of Pearl’s students. But that’s not how you won, in the end, is it? You never won because you were tough, or strong. You have a diamond in you but you’re not hard at all. Well, except on yourself.”
“In the end all of this was possible because you were soft. Just malleable and pliable enough when it was needed. And that takes guts.”
“Hey, I’m just saying,” Bismuth put a hand on his shoulder, and even with all the very human growing he’d done, he still seemed to almost disappear in it. “You put yourself out there for others… maybe it’s about time you let them help you.”
---
The next chapter of the His Dark Materials/Daemons AU which I am sooooo painfully late with it’s not even funny anymore. Already posted some excerpts [here] and [here].
“She’s been... away on business, but we’ve sent a zeppelin for her and she’s well on her way back. Hopefully.”
“You have a zeppelin?” Rose was rapidly failing in all her efforts to keep her voice down.
“Of a sort. We, er, we... stole it.”
“Stole-!”
“Yes, well, stole might be a strong word,” Pearl tapped a finger against her chin. “You see, there was a small decommissioned postal craft left below the southern mail station aërodock that nobody would ever miss, all I had to do was fix it up a bit and-”
Rose blinked. “You fixed a decommissioned zeppelin.”
Pearl waved a hand almost casually. “I had some help, but yes. Svalbard, understandably, is hard to reach with other means of transport, and Bismuth needed to be able to go back and forth.”
“You,” Rose began, awed, “are utterly wasted on bringing me my slippers, I’ll tell you that.”
“Well then, maybe,” Pearl blushed, but there was nothing hesitant about her smirk and the strikingly proud tilt of her head, “maybe you could take them off with a bit more care than kicking them halfway across the room and sending them off under the cabinets and- and then I wouldn’t need to do that at all. And I could fix all the zeppelins in the world.”
-
[more from the super secret backroom rebellion meeting]
“They’re with the Consistorial Court of Discipline, no doubt. Always on the lookout for,” Bismuth grimaced, “heretics. A lot falls under that. A lot of good excuses to snatch someone off the street and do who knows what to them. And they’ve been funneling people there, people vanished by the CCD. Not lacking in test subjects lately.”
“How did you get this? Where?” It was Sapphire, this time. Ruby seemed overwhelmed, and sat clutching her hand desperately as the tiny frog and hare both whispered something to her.
“We traced the funding for all this. It was difficult and deliberately obfuscated, but we managed. A facility like this, an entire operation, cost a pretty amount, you’d assume - and you’d be right. It had to come from somewhere. And whoever was paying for it was likely to want to know what was being done with their investment.”
“So we followed the trail. And it turned out I was… ideally positioned to… to, erm, procure what evidence there was to be found. Because, well...” Pearl trailed off, and lifted one of the stolen report sheets for all to see.
It was as clear as day, the family crest right above the astronomical amount being granted. Four diamonds, neatly arranged.
Neshu’s ears were flat against his mane, and Rose found herself wishing the ground would simply open up and swallow both her and him and the chair that she sat on and he’d tried to duck under.
Bismuth spoke up, grim, every drop of earlier exuberance gone from her. “When the Diamonds look out from the windows of their mansion, they don’t see people. They see tools, toys, and weapons. Nothing else.” She sounded more tired than angry. “It’s just what they’ve always been doing, but writ large.”
---
And then, of course, the Longass PearlRose Fixit because I hate the gag order but at the same time want it gone… slowly and organically. Alternating Rose and Pearl POVs spanning throughout the rebellion era, all sorts of flashbacks and Imagining Things included. At one point they end up attempting to essentially jailbreak Pearl, because Pearl is, as we all know, absolutely the most hardcore. Also thank you SU Movie for confirming all the awful Alexa-flavour fanon/headcanons and giving me an excuse to dive into a bunch of Gems-as-AI tropey stuff, on top of everything. [another previously posted fragment here]
“I don’t want to. I never want to do that to you again.” She stops, takes a breath, reconsiders. “And I know it’s a lot to ask of you, the trust I just… trampled over. So I want to make sure that it’s not just that, you trusting me not to make the same mistake again, with no reassurance anywhere. I—I want to not be able to. Nobody should be able to do that to you.”
“Nobody should be able to do that to anyone,” Pearl corrects readily.
“You’re right,” Rose smiles, only a bit wry, “as always. My brilliant, brilliant Pearl. What would I do without you?”
“Never get back to the point you were trying to make, I imagine,” Pearl quips with something resembling sauciness, and Rose feels at least some of the weight starting to lift off her.
“Right,” Rose agrees, chastised, and tries to focus. “I just… I’m not sure how, or what I need to do at all. It’s not like there’s much precedent – ownerless pearls are unheard of. Even when their owners get shattered, it’s only ever temporary, and, with such high demand, very brief.”
Pearl nods in agreement, and hums. “Luckily, we’ve seen plenty of unheard of and unspeakable things here.”
[echoes of Scabbard convo]
“I want to know, I want to be certain, that you’re here because you want to be.”
“So do I.” Pearl responds quietly, letting their fingers entwine.
[Giving an order not to follow orders doesn’t work, failsafes exist. Then they try a sort of ownership transfer thing, and try to make the new owner Pearl. It doesn’t register, “invalid transfer target”, even when Pearl tries to hack it - some odd gem tool that scans and pokes at her gem - she gets all bummed out because she can’t even reprogram a very basic and modifiable handheld tool/device to recognise a pearl as an actual gem and person. What chance does she have against hearts and minds and an entire ingrained culture of an entire sprawling empire?
“You changed my mind,” says Rose all softly and earnestly.
Have I really? Pearl asks herself but doesn’t let it escape out loud. Still. Step by small step, she admits to herself. Incremental, slow, but persistent work. She can do that. Even as down on herself as she is, she can do that.]
“The… the override.” Pearl breathes out suddenly.
“What?”
“The administrative override - you, or, well... Pink Diamond should be able to trigger it, even without a Rejuvenator. We shouldn’t…” Pearl looks strangely scared now, swallowing small gulps before pushing onwards, hands trembling and fingers knotting together, “w-we shouldn’t need a full reset, really, but. But we can try modifying the owner identification...”
Having to… turn into Pink again (turn back into yourself, you mean, a small voice whispers, who are you trying to fool) doesn’t sit well with her, of course, but. Get a hold of yourself, Pearl certainly has it so much worse in this scenario.
[more here about how they both need to kind of “revert” a bit to try this and it sucks, because no! unpleasant poking of holes in the elaborate fantasy! For the greater good, but still.]
And oh, Pearl looks just about ready to either cry with some strange terror Rose has never seen her display, or dissipate her form on the spot - the small dam of coldly throwing around terms like administrative override activation and owner identification variable providing just enough distance for her to carry on.
“It shouldn’t be too risky if we’re… if you’re careful.”
[Pearl trusts her with everything, her literal entire self - with this thing that is such a blatant violation of her being and her person, that she now wants to turn against itself, using one of the most humiliatingly clearly objectifying aspects of her status as an instrument of her liberation. It is all A Lot.]
Rose remembers, also, with a sting, the way she grumbled and sulked over the gaping pit of guilt in her stomach and refused to even look at the glowing, floating shell Blue was so insistently pushing her towards. She wanted her Pearl back, not whatever White and the others had decided to foist upon her now. Not a pale replacement, nothing they deemed suitable.
-
“Please state preferred customisation options.”
“Come on, Pink,” Blue urges, softly but mercilessly as ever, large hands enveloping Pink almost whole from where they’re planted on her shoulders, “White had her specially made, just for you! And we helped as well - only the best for our Pink. Now it’s up to you to put your finishing touches, as is proper-”
“What for? You’ll just take her away when you feel like it anyway,” she grumbles into her arms, curling up on the floor and resolutely refusing to look even as the glow spreads from the corner of her eye, insistent.
Just as insistent as the awfully familiar little voice. “Please state preferred customisation options.”
“I. Don’t. Care!” But now with a newly noticeable, if strained restraint - not, like her usual, punctuated with a slam of her fist on the floor tiles, perfectly shiny and pink. No, she couldn’t- do something like that again-
“Default setting selected. Please stand by.”
Yellow scoffs and moves to leave. “Come on, Blue. No point to us wasting our time being here if she’s just going to throw one of her tantrums.”
But Blue refuses to leave it at that, and makes sure to cut with parting words, before slinking through the large pink doorway. “I am very disappointed in you, Pink. To act like that, and with White personally making sure you got such a lovely gift even after everything...”
“Waste of good nacre, if you ask me,” Yellow muses from somewhere up above. “At least try not to break this one.”
The glow intensifies with a hum, and Pink screws her eyes shut and pretends not to see or hear anything.
By the time she opens them again, the others are gone.
But then there is another presence at her side, hovering just behind, as is proper court protocol. The shuffling of tiny, soft slippers on the polished stone - weren’t pearls supposed to be endlessly, effortlessly quiet?
“Leave me alone,” she preempts quietly. The shuffling moves away.
-
“Please identify yourself.”
Calmly, now, calmly but firmly, just like we planned it. Don’t mess this up now. She’s counting on you. She trusts you. “Pearl.”
“Please state preferred customisation options.”
They’ve discussed this too, of course - extensive (over)preparation and planning down to minutiae is Pearl’s go-to at the best of times, and something she clutches at for comfort at the worst of times. And she’s always, to a sometimes comical extent, despised that ridiculous dress. To a wonderful extent, too, all things considered.
“Revert to last implemented appearance.”
“Settings selected. Please stand by.”
[Of course this doesn’t work because all it does is change the $username$ variable, not the actual identity of the person imprinted: it’s still Rose/Pink, she’s just nicknamed “Pearl” now, but she can still give orders and everything.]
[evolves into Pearl literally hacking herself… the most hardcore of modders]
---
Pearl Playing the Field aka “why not hyper-analyze that one brief shot of the notes and phone numbers in Pearl’s gem and write 9 meet-cutes”. Pearl goes out to “find herself”. Whatever that is supposed to mean. Supposed to be set pre-ASPR, but also extends past it. Ended up with some Bispearl in it too because I am predictable and can absolutely not help myself.
“Your hair is wonderful!” She feels like she almost has to shout to be heard over the din of the bar’s ill-chosen soundtrack, and she doesn’t appreciate it. Definitely not one of her favourite places she’s decided to visit recently. And the ventilation is atrocious.
But still, she’s come all this way, so she may as well make the best of it. And while the preoccupation with hairstyles during first meetings seems like a bit of an odd running theme (can it really be termed a running theme, though, if it’s happened all of two times?), it’s certainly worked in the past (recent, very recent, and hardly bursting with relevant instances, Pearl!). Oh, and this particular one is just too fascinating. Approaching a work of art, Pearl would dare say. Especially, well. Especially when paired with the lovely eyes and striking jawline and strong neck it seems to deliberately be drawing attention to.
Pearl leans on the bar, in the bit of space the woman happily makes for her, and tries to look confident and well-informed, but not smug, no, never smug. “I know... about the, uh, goop, of course. I know how one accomplishes this.”
The woman gives a bemused smile. “Thanks! Not too shabby yourself.” She leans in closer. “I'm actually in school for it.”
“School?” Pearl casts desperately back to what she's heard from Steven and Greg's often hasty instruction. That was for educating human children, wasn't it? She'd put one together for Steven that one time, with desks and a blackboard… and Connie attended one regularly...
“Yeah, kind of a late game career change.” Pearl nods along as she realises - or, rather, remembers - she is absolutely terrible at gauging human ages. “But I thought... after almost 30 years in accounting and not going anywhere I wanted to be going... it’s not like we have all the time in the world, right? So I figured, why not? Go for something I'm actually invested in and that I've always wanted to do, y'know?”
“Oh. Oh yes, yes I do.” And for once, she really does. Well, not the time-related bit, perhaps, but the very particular delight of getting to pursue one’s genuine interests after a long while of being denied? Absolutely. “I’ve done something of the sort myself, actually. Go for it! As they, uh, say.”
The dramatic gesture of almost punching the air with a closed triumphant/defiant fist might have been a tad over the top, but it wins her a smile that doesn’t seem unkind. The woman winks and tips her glass at Pearl, then finishes her drink - something sweet-smelling and almost as colourful as her hair.
“I had a classmate do this one for me, and I did hers after.” Pearl is nodding along again, leaning in to hear better as the woman’s voice dips lower. “I kind of like to experiment, push the limits, go wild with it. Hey. You interested? Promise I won’t go too wild on you.”
Pearl's mind goes blank there for a moment. The woman is… very close, and there are unignorable implications unrelated to hair styling so obvious here even she is picking up on them without issue, and the music hasn’t gotten any quieter. Interested in what, exactly, she wants to ask, but she came here for wild new experiences and exciting novelty, didn’t she, so instead comes out with a rather strangled-sounding: “Eughhhhh...uhhh.... Ye...s?”
The woman’s expression goes serious. “Hey, come on, we don’t have to do anything you’re not comfortable with.”
---
Forge Showdown AU - aka in a twist of fate Bismuth poofs Rose during their confrontation and revelations happen that change the course of… well, pretty much everything - one of a bunch of AUs where the PD reveal happens earlier and under different circumstances (I had an idea of doing a 5+1 of those at one point).
The glow of the lava coloured the quickly dissipating smoke more orange-red than pale pink, and Bismuth stared numbly at where their revered leader, Rose Quartz herself, had been standing mere moments ago. She’d lashed out, true, but she hadn’t really been expecting the clumsy blow - more of a warning, or underlining a point in their continued argument-turned-fight - to land. In all their many sparring sessions, Rose had never succumbed to something like that, would have never so much as let it brush against her. But she’d been- frozen, distracted… by what?
There, scraping softly against the ground as it rolled with leftover momentum...
That was not a rose quartz gem.
Bismuth raked her mind feverishly, thought back through the last few, oddly blurred seconds.
“We’re not using this, Bismuth! It’d make us just as bad as them!”
“No! You’re the one who’s as bad as them- look at you, lording over all of us, thinking it’s your right to command me, order me around, like you’re, what, my diamond?”
It… it had to be some kind of imposter, or spy. Right? Some kind of… awful Homeworld plan, trying to tear the Rebellion apart from the inside. Where was Rose, then? The real one? Captured? Being interrogated somewhere, her whereabouts kept strictly secret to minimise the chance of rescue? Shattered? Impossible, they’d never hear the end of the victorious crowing.
When could it have happened? The last few battles and meetings had been nothing out of the ordinary, and Bismuth couldn’t think of anything odd or off about Rose recently at all. Not a single hint or sign that anything was amiss. Not a single misstep. Homeworld would have trained and conditioned its agents well, but Rose- Rose was singular, and utterly one-of-a-kind, and how could they possibly capture all of it so perfectly-
Bismuth startled out of her thoughts as the beginnings of light seemed to gather in the core of the gem, and all but threw herself onto it, encasing it in a bubble.
Rose was rather special, wasn’t she? And not just in what she said or what she did or how she behaved or what she led and encouraged them to do, but…
Her endless array of wondrous powers. Her sheer strength, overpowering ruby fusions and quartz battalions alike almost single-handedly. The healing which Bismuth herself had been on the receiving, lifesaving end of countless times. The way she called upon the organic creatures of the planet to fight for her, fighting in their name. And then, her regular absences. The way she seemed to know exactly what the Homeworld troops were up to - that wasn’t just some kind of tactical brilliance.
She dared to look at the gem again. Its hue was changed some by the bubble, but that was still in no way a rose quartz gem. No, it was an altogether different shape, but a terrifyingly familiar one.
But it made no sense!
Bismuth ran a slightly trembling hand down her face.
Pearl. Of course, Pearl would have to know, if anyone. About… whatever this was.
But if this, if she was… her, then Pearl-
Bismuth’s insides twisted in horrible ways as the implications began to flitter through her mind, each one worse than the one before it. There was the old call-and-response ringing in her ears, making her feel disoriented and sick with what had to be the beginnings of anger, could grow into a great fury, leaving her unnecessary breaths ragged: Who do you belong to? Nobody!
But-
Not Pearl, then. At least, not at first. Garnet. Garnet would know, and Garnet could See. They’d get to the bottom of this.
---
A metric ton of rebellion era ficlets, vignettes from my eeeEEeeEEeeEEE Bismuth collection mostly, which I’ve been accumulating since 2016 and have only posted some - Pearl, Rose, Garnet, Bismuth centric, occasionally with my takes on namedropped characters, some of which would now need an update to match actual canon.
Snowflake was there, held in Garnet’s arms. The familiar pattern of white speckles on black skin, the tight silver coils of hair sticking out every which way.
“We got her back. She wanted to see you.”
“Me? And you just listened to her? Are you out of your mind? How can I help? Have you taken her to Rose? If her gem- if she-”
“I’m right here!” Snowflake struggled out of Garnet’s hold, and stood up - wobbly, barely upright, but determined, on those legs that ran circles around Homeworld, and ran interference and messages faster than any Wailing Stone, in a pinch. “And I’m fine!”
“You don’t look fine, Snowy- listen, please just-”
Snowflake walked up to her, not stumbling a single time, and, gritting her teeth, looked right at her. The hairline fractures in her gem were visible from here, and Bismuth couldn’t help a wince. “Snowflake, come on-”
“I didn’t tell them anything.”
Bismuth wanted to clutch her to her chest and scream a thousand things at her, but You don’t have to prove anything to me and I’m proud of you and I’m going to make them pay for ever laying a finger on you all waged a war in her throat.
In the end she just settled on holding her close, very gently, until Garnet left, unheard, and came back with Rose, tears already in abundance.
[Later:] “I never properly thanked you, Garnet. For bringing Snowflake back.”
Garnet shrugged. “It was a group effort.”
-
A familiar voice sounded at the entrance to the Forge. “Now come along, it’s just here. Bismuth? Do you have a moment?”
“You know I always have time for you, Pearl,” she called back, putting her current project away. “What did you nee- oh.”
Bismuth blinked.
“Uh... wow,” was the only thing she could manage as pearl after pearl filed into her Forge, soon taking up most of the space around the anvil in impressively neat rows. “New recruits? A whole bunch of you, too.”
“Yes, well,” Pearl made her way to the front of the group, carefully avoiding brushing against the others on her way. She was fidgeting again, long fingers tangling and untangling rapidly, and that was one sure sign of mounting distress. “Garnet and I had planned out an attack on one of Blue Diamond’s supply lines. There was supposed to be a shipment of weapons coming in today, but it turns out it was… pearls.”
There was something rather off about Pearl’s tone, too. Bismuth made a note to ask later, and do her best to catch her alone.
“Well, all the better for us. Nice to have you all on board.” Her jovial tone was only slightly forced - the pearls all looked like they clearly needed something resembling friendliness, but their skittishness was palpable. She turned towards a pale green pearl right at the front of the group. “Now, what do I call you?”
There was nothing but mild confusion, vague fear, and general quiet shuffling. “No ideas yet? Don’t worry about it! There’s plenty of time to decide and find something that fits.”
[she does indeed manage to talk to Pearl alone, later]
“What’s the real problem, Pearl? You can’t fool me. I can tell something’s wrong.”
The rather flimsy front finally crumbled at that.
“I just… we- we took out the citrines they’d sent with the shuttle, and Garnet boosted me up so I could force the hatch open and I did, but then...” Pearl let out a distressed little half-sigh half-sob, one hand gesturing weakly. “They were all looking at me so wide-eyed and...”
She took a moment to at least attempt to collect herself.
“I don’t mind having them here, it’s not that at all. It’s just that… we were standing there, with all these newly-made pearls and… obviously I couldn’t just leave them there, in the middle of nowhere! And after what we did, whoever found them, they’d just have them shattered. Because of me. They were compromised. You’ve heard what they do now, haven’t you?”
“Yeah, I’ve heard. They’re the monsters, Pearl, and it’s not on you. It’s not you doing that to pearls, it’s them.”
“But it is on me! It quite literally is because of me, because of what I did, and continue to do. I made myself visible and played at being important and look what it got us,” Pearl was near tears, a frustrated blue colouring her face, “a handful of runaways and the rest being treated worse than ever.”
The tears were out in full force after that, and Bismuth put an arm around Pearl’s shaking shoulders. “Hey, hey, none of that.”
“We ended up taking them with us, but it feels like… it feels like I forced them to come here. Is it really any better than what Homeworld does? All I did was say you’re going to be rebels instead of you’re going to serve and they never got a say in anything.”
“Have you asked them?”
“They don’t know what-”
“Hey. Just ask them, okay? Ask them what they want. We can help them either way. Of course I’d love them to stay. But it’s not up to me, and if they want to go to wherever it was they were supposed to go- we can do that, too.”
-
[Rose discovers her healing tears in a dramatic fashion - they come up with the idea to make the fountain - and thanks to Save the Light we have a pretty good idea of who lovingly made all those statues]
She gently wiped away some of the chiselling dust with the flat of her thumb, just like a tear. A magnificent, healing, life-giving tear.
This was familiar work. But with none of the endless chafing, none of the hated reminders of her former station - Bismuth couldn’t find anything in herself but reverence. And… inspiration. She was a Gem, stars knew she didn’t need rest, breaks, anything of the sort, but still - this pace wasn’t something she’d felt driven to in a long, long while. All day under the burning summer sun, and every night under the light of her own gem. All alone, as the sanctuary took form under her hands.
To get the curls just right, tiny detail by tiny detail, somehow communicate the softness of those cheeks in stone… it took drawing upon the very depths of her well of skill, because how else could she ever hope to capture the likeness of someone as extraordinary as Rose Quartz?
With small, careful movements, she formed the roundness of the lips that could spit fiery words of rebellion, inspire like no other, scowl fiercely in the heat of battle, smile contagiously, bellow out an outrageous fireside guffaw, murmur comforts so softly, kiss…
And then she did it again, and again, and again.
[in the end, Rose is presented with a veritable shrine to herself]
“Rose? Is something wrong? You… don’t like it?”
“No, no, Bismuth, it’s… it’s incredible.” The smile Rose turned on her was as beautiful as anything, but it wasn’t hard to notice it didn’t quite reach her eyes.
#steven universe#oathkeeper writes things#INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO:#pearl#bismuth#rose quartz#bispearl#pearlrose#daemon au#the pearletariat#pearl playing the field#those stars of brightest magnitude#let's get down to bismuth#steven universe future#i love pearls just... bury me in a big pile of pearls honestly#endless wip pile#fanfiction#my fic
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I’m getting job training at Bonehaven learning center
I’m typing this on my phone because I don’t have a computer, but i’m hoping to get one in the next month. Anyways, my name is Logan, and I had no direction in life. I was born on March 22, 2003, so i’ll be 18 in about a month. I have a few interesting things about me that might be important for this blog. I am autistic, I suffer from several mental disorders that cause psychosis, anger issues, and in general destructive behavior. I dropped out of high school midway through junior year, and have been through the process of getting my ged while holding down a job at a grocery store.
I don’t know when but my parents found out about a program called Job Corps, and I filled out an application. I’ll be going to the Bonehaven center in Oregon, where I will be trained in SAPS(Security and protective services). This should be happening in the next few months, but since right now my life is doing pretty poorly social wise, I thought writing a journal might help. I don’t like being trapped in my own bubble though, so i’m doing a blog. Instead of screaming my thoughts onto paper, i’ll be doing it into the void that is the internet.
My hobbies include reading and writing, listening to music, and practicing bass(I’m not very good at it). I’m hoping in the future though to write my own music, or at least perform in a band. My main dream is to become a ghost and monster hunter though, traveling the United States checking out hotspots of folklore and supernatural activity. Sadly I have to focus on reality, and that’s why I am doing SAPS with Job Corps, I’m not an idiot but i’m not the smartest guy either, and despite me having a bit of a weight issue, when i’m working out regularly I have body builder muscles and i’m absolutely swol.
Right now me and my friends are going through a rough patch, I spend too much money and time on my friend Ivy, while I barely spend time with Jenny. It doesn’t help that they hate each other and refuse to be in the same room together. Ivy is super needy and texts me every day to hang out, which makes me irritable most of the time so I usually lie and say I’m working because I need my alone time. Jenny never texts me and I rarely see her cause she lives a couple towns over, and I don’t have my license yet so I always have to ask for a ride.
I’m hoping to get my license soon, but with this pandemic, it’s been nearly impossible to get an appointment set up. I have this old convertible Chrysler that my grandma gave me, it needs a new battery and hood, and before I take it in to get fixed, I have to scrub the inside down with bleach because of all the mold. It’s a really nice car though and I hope to have it running in a couple months. I have a bit of an energy drink addiction and right now I’m in love with these zero calorie, 300 mg caffeine drinks. I get the new red dragon flavor and it’s just a really good and smooth fruit punch flavor.
At my job, I’m the closing parcel, so i’m the guy pushing carts and cleaning the restrooms, though I refuse to clean the womens restroom after I had done my whole *knock knock* “HOUSEKEEPING, ANYBODY INSIDE?!?!?” routine, and nobody answered, so I walked in and in the first stall, a woman was...having some fun I guess, awkward thing was she stared me in the eyes and only did it more furiously, so I just don’t go in there anymore. My bosses are generally very pleasant and easy to work with, except for Big Bitch and Little Bitch, who I will not say their names as to not reference their names.
Big Bitch has no idea how to manage people, and has a thick accent that makes it very hard to understand him. He’s the one that tells me to go vacuum the front lobby when the cart bays are over flowing and people are complaining. Little Bitch has absolutely no empathy or awareness of his surroundings, he generally wanders off to go talk to customers or check his phone, while he lets the assistant manager do all the hard work of managing the front end. The assistant managers are the people I can actually respect, because they’re real people instead of an annoying character that only exists to make my day harder.
In general I don’t have to do much most days, and take long breaks because people often don’t use carts or make massive messes, you’d think they would but it’s only happen a couple times in the year i’ve worked here. At home I live in a repurposed bathroom, where the sink, bathtub, and toilet had all been removed and paved over to turn the room into an exceptionally large storage room, where I have a twin sized bed, a tv, and an xbox that I never play. Often at night, I can hear my parents having sex over my music because the walls are so thin. Getting drunk or high helps, but most days I just turn the tv up high or listen to music via my headphones.
I’m going to be switching to a flip phone, because I want to stop using social media as often, and I just think they’re cool. I love old tech. I’m making the switch after I get a laptop, so that i’ll still have a way to update this blog. Anyways I’ve, recently been getting into the occult, mainly to explain my prophetic dreams that are either random events that i’m going to experience or end of the world scenarios that happen in other universes. My mom had the ability to see and conjure the dead, and my brothers inherited that ability, but I didn’t. While i’m sensitive to the supernatural, I can’t perceive what’s around me, only what’s in my head
I initially thought it was some sort of schizophrenia the voices in my head, but even after taking anti psychotics and getting monthly injections, they never went away. I never told anybody though, because I don’t want to go to a hospital again. I’ve been trying to categorize and place the voices, but they’re not the same every time, and they’re not talking to me. They’re just talking, it’s like eavesdropping on a conversation that doesn’t exist, but yet some how, the information I hear is usually about the people around me, some random stuff, and me. I’m currently in the small break room, with an ear bud in my right ear and two conversations going on to my left.
One is my coworkers talking to each other, and the other one is a man talking to a woman, I don’t really know what it’s about but a few snippets are “Yeah I piss in the milk, they can’t tell though. I’ve managed to open a door, gonna try to do that again soon. I made about 3 kids cry again, honestly if I could I’d make a career out of it”
Just random things like that, in general though the conversation seems to be about somebody named and I don’t know how this is spelt so this is a guess, “Hephitus” I have no idea who that is, but it seems like they’re talking about a person. I hear this name every now and then, but they dropped this name a few times and in general it’s them just verbally shitting on him/her, pretty much what I do when i’m talking about somebody. I typically ignore these convos but right now i’m bored, so I got nothing better to do. I have to go back to work now though, so Imma go. I’m going to try posting daily, so let me know what you think. This has been Logan or LogNecro, and this is my blog
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When you see this post a snippet of your WIP
I saw @dinosaursmate's post on my dash so here we go! This is from my Pygmalion AU (which might be my big bang??? Maybe???)
It takes four weeks. From start to finish, that’s actually not that bad; Louis has spent more time than that on sculptures before. Of course, the reason that it only took four weeks is because…
Well, he’s not really done much else in the meantime.
He’d eaten, when he remembered to. He’d slept. But from morning to night, he’d been in his studio. He’d had his groceries delivered, only sent the occasional text to Zayn to let him know he was still alive (something left over from when they’d first stopped living together, and Louis no longer had anyone to tear him away from his work). He hadn’t even watched any football on the telly. Most days, in fact, Louis hadn’t even known what day it was until he checked his phone, and he forgot it just as soon as he put it back down.
But finally, his perfect man, his masterpiece, is done.
Louis isn’t sure how to feel about it.
On the last day, when he knew he was about to finish, he’d procrastinated. He’d called Zayn, for the first time in weeks, made plans to go out with him and Niall that evening, and if Zayn had been surprised to hear from him he hadn’t said anything.
He’d gone out to get his own groceries. Had even cooked a proper meal.
It’s stupid, and juvenile, because all he literally has to do is finish the last perfect little toe. Everything else is done, Harry is done, and Harry is going to be perfectly happy in his new home, because Harry is a statue and statues don’t have feelings.
And Louis isn’t going to miss him because Louis is not that pathetic, and it’s unhealthy to have an attachment to inanimate objects. Even if said inanimate object is a physical representation of his perfect man, and holds too many of Louis’ secrets and dreams for the future that he hadn’t been able to keep to himself as he was working.
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