Thinking about everything with Rhyme and Beat in TWEWY and getting unnecessarily sad about fictional siblings bc just. Fuck.
Like. Imagine you die saving the one person in the world that doesn't treat you like shit. Then minutes later you realize she still ended up dying because you weren't strong enough to protect her. And there was a hidden price for trying to come back, what you value more than anything, and in your case that was her entire memory of you. So she treats you like a stranger and it breaks your heart but you can't say anything about it. And her price was her dreams and goals so she's outwardly happy but silently depressed bc she has nothing to strive for.
And then. Just when it seems like everything's going okay. You make a mistake and this person you failed to save who can't even remember that you tried, she saves you. At the cost of her own chance. Without even remembering a thing about you, just because that's the kind of person she is, and in her mind you have more to live for because she gave up her dreams. And now you're still here but she's gone, because you still couldn't protect her.
Then someone suggests a way to maybe save her, but it involves aligning with the people that destroyed her in the first place and may not even work. You can't go back, there's nothing left for you if you do, the one person that meant anything to you is gone. And so you dedicate whatever you have to doing whatever you need to do to bring her back. Because there's no point in getting a chance to live if she isn't there.
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I Loved You - Yusaku x Ai Drabble
Wrote this drabble in-between other projects. It's mainly an extended scene of Yusaku's reaction to Ai's death.
Here’s a link to the AO3 version if you’d prefer: https://archiveofourown.org/works/41131317
“Hey, can I ask you one final thing?” Ai’s voice was hardly more than a whisper, as it was clear he was fighting to find the strength to speak. “You lazily gave me the name Ai, but I really like it. If this name has a definition, what do you think it is?”
Yusaku, barely able to see through the tears in his eyes, knew his answer almost immediately. “Ai means ‘to love people’.” He stopped, unable to go on.
“I think so too. Now I understand that definition. Bye, Play- Yusaku.” Tears poured from his eyes as his body began to fade. “I loved you.”
And with those words, Ai disappeared, splitting into a million pieces like dust in the wind. A sob broke past Yusaku’s lips. He tried to clutch the specks of what remained of his partner to no avail.
When Yusaku opened his eyes again, he was suddenly hunched over some railing and he realised he was back in the real world. Before him stood Ai, his eyes closed and head hung low. His body swayed over the railing, falling to the ground below with a loud slam.
“Ai!” Yusaku gasped, vaulting over the railing.
It was a few metre drop but Yusaku didn’t care. He had to get to Ai. All around him were several copies of Ai’s body, all flopped on the ground and unmoving. Horror shot through Yusaku like a bullet to the chest. Falling to his knees, he grabbed Ai, what had once been the real Ai, in his arms as he choked back sobs. Then all of it came out in one loud cry.
“AI!”
Yusaku clutched the body of his partner, fresh tears streaming down his face as he pulled Ai into his chest.
“I loved you.” Those words… they’d haunt Yusaku forever. He’d never be able to unhear them, much less answer them. Because Yusaku had an answer. He’d done everything he could to deny it and hide it from even himself, never wanting Ai to know. Now it really would be “never.” And Yusaku was left with nothing but horrible heart-wrenching regret for every bad thing he’d ever said to his partner.
Trying not to sob, Yusaku leaned toward Ai’s ear. “I loved you too, Ai… my Ai…” Trembling, he placed a soft kiss on Ai’s forehead.
It seemed useless to say now. Ai would never know, even though he deserved to. He deserved the world. He deserved so much more than Yusaku had ever given him.
Yusaku had finally said it, but it was too late.
Or… was it?
A strange feeling surged in his heart, as if the gap Ai’s absence had left was being filled again. It was the same sensation he’d had when Ai came back after his sacrifices against Revolver and Bohman. Yusaku gazed up at the sunrise, his heart swelling with emotion.
“He’s alive.”
Yusaku couldn’t exactly confirm it, but still, there was a possibility. A hope. Ai was a part of Yusaku and he could sense his presence in his heart as strongly as he had before.
“Ai…” Yusaku put his arms around Ai’s body. “I promise… I’ll find you… and I’ll make things right.”
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🎶Martyn??
🎶 A headcanon about music
martyn likes to sing and is pretty good at coming lyrics on the spot; not to make everything about my favorite guy but he and oli have definitely had little music moments together in the series they’ve both been in
martyn mostly sings for fun and oli likes teaching people some of the actual techniques behind singing so sometimes they just get together and “practice”
send me asks boy
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The way some of y'all talk about Luke Newton is just. . .I need this fandom to check itself with a swiftness, because the very thinly veiled ableism is ENOUGH. Like it is WILD to see, in the year of our lord 2024, people either actively infantalizing or talking down this grown man.
Calling Luke Newton stupid for behaviors that are just him displaying his Neurodivergence? Ableism. Saying it because it takes him longer to answer a question is ableism. Saying it because he said something 'incorrectly' or not as eloquently on the fly as his neurotypical costars? Ableism.
Saying he's boring because he's quiet or he doesn't talk as much (because he often needs more processing time and/or has anxiety to surmount) is ableism. Knitpicking his social media and how he doesn't interact as much with a fandom that has actively been cruel to him is ableism.
Assuming Luke is out here like some helpless little lamb clinging to Nicola because 'oh, she's his comfort person!' instead of recognizing that they both lean on and like each other? Is ableism. Saying he has a one sided infatuation with her BECAUSE he needs her as said comfort person is ableism. Essentially being all 'awwww, poor wee baby, he has anxiety so thankfully his neurotypical costar is there to pick up the slack!' is. ableism. You cannot in one breath say that Nicola's love language is touch but also that Luke is the only one ever reaching to hold her hand because he needs her to ground him. That's ableism.
They both like each other. They have a very close relationship and they both clearly admire the other and like to be around one another. To frame it as him being some inept toddler and her as his more capable caretaker and 'thank God he has her to give him the save' is ableism! That's ableism, babes!! And in many cases people don't recognize that's what they're taking part in, but that's what it is.
He is a grown man and a hell of an actor. Yes, he's quieter than some of his costars. Yes, he contemplates what he says in his mind before he says it, and it takes him some time to do so. Yes, he doesn't behave the way his neurotypical peers do. He doesn't have to. He won't- because he has a neurodivergent brain. And he shouldn't have to behave as a neurotypical person or an 'acceptable' neurodivergent person to have respect from people who claim to be his fans.
He's been outspoken and unapologetic about being a neurodivergent actor with ADHD and dyslexia and how that can contribute to difficulties in the current media machine. He has discussed his coping mechanisms. He has specifically done so because he knows how difficult it can be to be a neurodivergent person in the limelight, and he uses that spotlight to show other neurodivergent actors they can be successful, too. And people saw this openly neurodivergent man and said some mad out of pocket nonsense about him.
As the tour comes to a close, I just really need people to look back on their beliefs and viewpoints during it and do some reflection, because I am side-eying a LOT of takes that have gone largely uncontested.
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war god sukuna has no need for you. you know this as intimately as you know yourself.
he is a monstrous god, well-suited to the mantle he was given from birth; two pairs of muscular arms as thick as the average man’s torso, two cruel faces, a gaping maw carved into the hardness of his stomach. to peer into sukuna’s eyes is to see death and famine and destruction — wars raged long before you and long after you — and live through it all.
he has no need for you. he is perhaps more powerful than the entire pantheon, even the six-eyed-one and the curse-consumer, who swallows the sky every day to bring night. you have little understanding of the sheer magnitude of his power — your pathetic human brain can only fathom so much — but you know that sukuna, undoubtedly, is the very meaning of the word. and yet, he keeps you.
you are not a concubine, though he shirks those he has in favour of your company. you are not a general, nor an admiral, nor a soldier, and yet he seeks your counsel. you are not a mage, and hardly a grand priestess, and yet sukuna finds your door instead of that of his great temple, where hundreds live and breathe to serve him.
you had only reached the status of alter-maiden before your own temple was crushed to dust; little responsibility was given to you beyond tending the hearth, studying, and occasionally helping with chores. but sukuna dresses you in the finery of high priestesses — gauzy crimson dresses that bare your stomach and chest, fine golden jewellery and garnets that appear almost black in low light — and instructs you to dance in the way your superiors did. dances of worship, dances that he does not need, because he is already all-powerful.
the dances fit you like armour fits the weedy frame of a young boy — your legs don’t quite stretch far enough, your arms can’t move with a fluidity only gained by experience — but sukuna watches you like you are a sorceress, enchanting him with each step. he hushes uruame as they try to speak, insisting on remaining undisturbed during your worship — and when you finish, panting and glistening with sweat, your god only hums in satisfaction, grin all sharp-toothed and feral.
it must be blasphemous, you think, to perform such revered dances so clumsily—
but perhaps even more blasphemous, though, is the lingering touches your god fixes upon your waist; the hunger in his eyes as you dance; the scrape of his pointed nails against your jawline; the tent in his robes at the sound of your laboured breaths after dancing.
you fear the god of war means to have you in more ways than one — and worse still, you can’t find it within you to care.
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