the psychic damage I get dealt every time I remember the vast improbability of Tolkien's string of elf twins ending in identical Elladan and Elrohir.
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
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I think that one thing people fail to understand is that unsolicited literary criticism coming from an online stranger who is reading with no knowledge of what the authors intended goal is, is not going to be received the same as say: the authors beta reader or friends who know what the authors intended goal and has the sufficient knowledge and input to help the author reach that desired outcome.
"But I'm only trying to be helpful" How do I know you have the knowledge and literary skill for you to be able to actaully do that when we don't know each other and you are essentially a stranger to me? Are you applying this criticism based out of personal biased experience and desire to see the story or characterization be driven in another direction or tweaked, or do you know the author's intentions for the character? If the story is incomplete, are you basing your criticism of a character on the incomplete narration with only partial information available of them or are you building up a report until the story's completion? Did the author provide you with the information needed to make a fully informed criticism?
Have you discussed with the author what their plans are or are you assuming them based off the narration, especially if the narration is proven or implied to be unreliable or missing key points of the plot? Are you unbiased enough to help them reach their desired outcome for the characters and story regardless of your personal feelings towards the characters/antagonists and setting? Can you handle being told your specific input isn't wanted because you're a reader and/or have no written anything relating to their genre or topic? Do you understand and respect that the author's personal experiences might influence their writing and make it different than how you would have done it personally? Do you understand if an author only wants input from a specific demographic relating to their story?
If it's for fanfiction or other hobby media, are you holding a free hobby to a professional standard? Are you trying to give criticism because you feel like the author has produced 'subpar job performance' of their fic? Are you viewing their work as a personal intimate outlet or something that must conform with mass media? Are you applying rules and guidelines when the fic is shared for simple sharing sake? Is your criticism worded appropriately and focused on the parts where the author has requested input on rather than a general dismissal and or disapproval?
Have you put yourself in a place where you assumed you have the input needed for the story to evolve better, or have you asked what the author needs and what they're having trouble with? Can you handle having your criticism rejected if the author decides their story doesn't need the change and not take it as a personal offense against your character? Are you crossing that boundary because you think you are doing the author a favor? Are you trying to be helpful, or do you just want to be?
I think sometimes when people hear authors go 'please don't give me unsolicited writing advice or criticism' they automatically chalk it up to 'this author doesn't want ANY constructive feedback on their stuff at all' and not "i already have trusted individuals who will help me with my writing goals and- hey i don't know you like that, please stop acting so overly familiar with me'
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Today at work, my stepmother called the place I work at, but didn't say anything and my manager said "Hey, your stepmom just called. It might be something serious." And I was genuinely worried that something bad had happened.
So, I check my phone in the break room (I usually leave my phone in my bag) and she asked "Did you let the dogs out before you left?" I was so angry when she did that (mainly because I was having a lot of bad luck and it all was piling up).
So when I got home, I told her about how I was worried that something had happened and you know what she said? "Oh, don't worry. I wouldn't call you if there was an emergency."
So my parents are willing to call me over and over again to ask if I let out the dogs before I left, but won't call me if my mother died or something??!!
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at some point it's just like. do they even fucking like the thing they're asking AI to make? "oh we'll just use AI for all the scripts" "we'll just use AI for art" "no worries AI can write this book" "oh, AI could easily design this"
like... it's so clear they've never stood in the middle of an art museum and felt like crying, looking at a piece that somehow cuts into your marrow even though the artist and you are separated by space and time. they've never looked at a poem - once, twice, three times - just because the words feel like a fired gun, something too-close, clanging behind your eyes. they've never gotten to the end of the movie and had to arrive, blinking, back into their body, laughing a little because they were holding their breath without realizing.
"oh AI can mimic style" "AI can mimic emotion" "AI can mimic you and your job is almost gone, kid."
... how do i explain to you - you can make AI that does a perfect job of imitating me. you could disseminate it through the entire world and make so much money, using my works and my ideas and my everything.
and i'd still keep writing.
i don't know there's a word for it. in high school, we become aware that the way we feel about our artform is a cliche - it's like breathing. over and over, artists all feel the same thing. "i write because i need to" and "my music is how i speak" and "i make art because it's either that or i stop existing." it is such a common experience, the violence and immediacy we mean behind it is like breathing to me - comes out like a useless understatement. it's a cliche because we all feel it, not because the experience isn't actually persistent. so many of us have this ... fluttering urgency behind our ribs.
i'm not doing it for the money. for a star on the ground in some city i've never visited. i am doing it because when i was seven i started taking notebooks with me on walks. i am doing it because in second grade i wrote a poem and stood up in front of my whole class to read it out while i shook with nerves. i am doing it because i spent high school scribbling all my feelings down. i am doing it for the 16 year old me and the 18 year old me and the today-me, how we can never put the pen down. you can take me down to a subatomic layer, eviscerate me - and never find the source of it; it is of me. when i was 19 i named this blog inkskinned because i was dramatic and lonely and it felt like the only thing that was actually permanently-true about me was that this is what is inside of me, that the words come up over everything, coat everything, bloom their little twilight arias into every nook and corner and alley
"we're gonna replace you". that is okay. you think that i am writing to fill a space. that someone said JOB OPENING: Writer Needed, and i wrote to answer. you think one raindrop replaces another, and i think they're both just falling. you think art has a place, that is simply arrives on walls when it is needed, that is only ever on demand, perfect, easily requested. you see "audience spending" and "marketability" and "multi-line merch opportunity"
and i see a kid drowning. i am writing to make her a boat. i am writing because what used to be a river raft has long become a fully-rigged ship. i am writing because you can fucking rip this out of my cold dead clammy hands and i will still come back as a ghost and i will still be penning poems about it.
it isn't even love. the word we use the most i think is "passion". devotion, obsession, necessity. my favorite little fact about the magic of artists - "abracadabra" means i create as i speak. we make because it sluices out of us. because we look down and our hands are somehow already busy. because it was the first thing we knew and it is our backbone and heartbreak and everything. because we have given up well-paying jobs and a "real life" and the approval of our parents. we create because - the cliche again. it's like breathing. we create because we must.
you create because you're greedy.
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"Can it run DOOM?" - boring, of course it can run DOOM, I've seen everything run DOOM from a knitted blanket to a pregnancy test to DNA
"Can it be used to recreate Bad Apple?" - exciting, imaginative, ALWAYS blows me away with the execution, an eternal banger, I am never expecting it and I am always pleasantly surprised to see Bad Apple in a new medium
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Zelda goes mushroom girl
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he can't be gentle. how could he possibly be something that was beaten out of him so cruelly at such a young age?
you don't get soft fingers dancing lightly along your hairline as you sleep on his lap, no, you get a large, calloused paw brushing back your hair so he can see your pretty, pretty features better cos it was annoying him. he can't hold your hand don't be daft he'll crack your smaller bones in half... is the reasoning that he hopes will convince himself to stop fucking thinking about playing with your pretty fingers and pressing soft kisses to them. he's not soft! he's a killing machine! he knows nothing but anger and rage and numbness. so what is this strange fuzzy sensation in the hollow hole in his chest that's bothering him? why does it feel good? why is it making him fucking smile?
when he curls his mass around your sleeping body, don't be mistaken. he doesn't want to feel the way you fit perfectly against him. he's just.. trying to swallow you whole. he's not trying to get closer to you no no he's actually attempting to steal your joy. it's not as if you lessen the, thus far, endless and overwhelming burden of his corporeal blight oh no he's just using you.
everytime he presses his mouth against you and doesn't suck your blood out, he reasons that he's practising self-control and instead forcing himself to leave featherlight kisses that make you giggle oh so sweetly even when he knows deep down that he'd pluck out every one of his own teeth if even one dared puncture your skin. simon's not a soft man. he's not a gentle man. he's killed countless with the very hands that you play with. he tells himself you mean nothing to him, that he could walk away and forget you whenever he felt like it but everytime he wishes that his fingers were softer so that they may be more pleasant upon your skin and everytime he wishes that his lips were less chapped so that you may kiss him more, he knows he's fighting a losing battle.
simon riley will become a soft and gentle man in your embrace and there's not one thing he can do to prevent it.
masterlist
pls comment i have so many thoughts about this man that need to be talked about xx
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"Redesigned" Totodile
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I do really like the way the new chapter kind of showcases that Loid is really starting to settle into this whole parenting gig.
Like first 20 chapters Loid would have immediately gone into an anxiety induced fit about being a horrible fake father and how he's failing the mission and Anya, if Anya pulled the same crying fit trick on him (like she's done with success before) or he'd at least start to doubt his choices a little. But he just acts like a regular dad does and tells her to shut up, he doesn't give a fuck and she's staying her ass at home. And she would have too if Yor didn't convince him and if that isn't the most family shit ever I don't know what is
That's the growth we needed. Nature is healing.
Also he would have never out loud called her a brat before especially where Yor or someone else could hear and doubt their "father daughterly ness" but now he's yelling at her like a true father. Because yeah she really don't be listening but we love her for it.
I don't know I've always just felt like he's his truest self when it's just him and Anya. mostly because when he's not hyper focused on appearing like the greatest dad, Anya is just so ridiculous and left field that its hard to have anything less than a genuine reaction to her and the things she says. Also in regards to this operation stryx, she's the person he has the least to hide from, they both know he's not her dad and she's not his kid and that his marriage to Yor is fake. There's nobody to play pretend for, and that allows him to be just a little more real in their interactions because she's real with him.
Like I know he's a spy so we never really know his truest personality cause he's always putting on a mask, even with bond he puts on the mask of trainer no matter how badly he's not deceiving anyone, but honestly it doesn't feel like there's a mask with her. He's not Loid or Twilight with her but some secret third thing. Just a man with no real name but who is no less real and the strange kid he's trying to do right by no matter how many stress lines she cause him
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if you took a language class in school (any level, any language) did your instructor assign you a name from that language? like, when i took french in high school i was assigned a "french name" that i had to use in that class. did anyone else experience this?
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I think what a lot of j&h adaptations get wrong, is that ultimately, Jekyll is, at heart. A Cunt. Lots of adaptations like to write him as an innocent scientist, who got more than he bargained for when he drank the potion, and unleashed a monster, but in the novella, the only thing the potion really does, is change Jekyll's appearance. He created Hyde, and I think he had the opportunity to make Hyde into something good, but, because he's a cunt, he chose to use his alter ego as a force for evil and chaos. "Edward Hyde was alone in the ranks of evil"- of course he was, you never allowed him to be anything else. And Jekyll is fully aware of what he does as Hyde, he says it himself in his full statement, and he feels no remorse. He didn't create Hyde accidentally, he made Hyde because he wanted to do bad things and get away with it, without damaging his reputation.
Fuck Dr Jekyll, all my homies hate Dr Jekyll.
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"Op is Binghe" this "who gave Binghe a tumblr" that
NO!!!! I AM NOT LUO BINGHE!!!!
Luo Binghe is a BITCH baby masochist submissive omega looking ass. No game. No skill.
And I am the super cool troubled alcoholic that people consider dating to get back at their parents AND I know how to use lube at least. Unlike SOME dumbass shizun married
"Ohh I treat shizuns body with care" well thats your mistake binghe put me in the same room as shen yuan and I am violating him ways that cannot even be conceived . I should be married to shizun it'd so unfair
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Oh god, oh fuck, oh no; the parallels between Jean at the beginning of tsc panicking and telling Wymack "I want to go home" and Jean at the end of tsc falling apart after finding out his baby sister has died, telling Neil the same thing.
"I want to go home."
He is only nineteen
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