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geekwritersworld · 3 years

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hi, el! i hope you're doing good (well, if not, it's okay. we all have awful days. it's totally okay to cry and rest for a while!) im just here to request a tom hiddleston fic where y/n is a celebrity (feel free to choose! model, actress, singer, anything.) that is kind of spoiled, what she wants is what she gets. not until she met tom who somehow helped her on how to budget stuff. then, the media spread nasty rumours about them and y/n's parents don't like their relationship. they tried to fight for their love, and then all so suddenly they started to doubt each other and let what the media say to their head and they decided to break things off. 3 years later, they saw each other at a gala or something, they started to reminisce with each other and think about what could have been if they continued to fight for their love, but nonetheless, they're still happy for each other. and an extra is someone took a photo of them. y/n is looking at tom while touching her purse looking happy and tom is also looking at y/n, both having familiarity and softness in their eyes. thank you! (and of course, it's okay if you won't write this! )

Hoax

Pairing: Tom Hiddleston x actress!reader

Warnings: Long, kind of angsty but not much,

A/N:I kinda base her personality off of Lexie brooks from the middle*Also Anon I apologize for taking so long in putting this fic out.

As always, feedback is always welcome, please comment and let me know what you thought. Thank you for reading❤❤

It had always gone her way. She had enough money to buy her way through things. What she wanted she got.

And no one really stopped her. Why would they when she spoiled them too?

However though she may have always gotten what she wanted, but she’d also always managed to remain kind. People found it bewildering when they’d see the way she’d get always get what she wanted but at the same time she was sweet and patient.

It was undoubtedly something she’d learned from anywhere but her parents, to always remain kind, despite your circumstances.

Y/n always felt the pressure of the outside world that seemed to be watching her every move. She found herself over the years to be spending a lot more time at home rather than out, which was odd since she’d been quite extroverted. she became extremely picky over the numerous invites she’d receive to numerous events. Preferring to keep her circle small, since it was easier to keep the relationships real, Y/n didn’t socialize over a certain point.

It was often assumed that as an actress Y/n would have quickly adjusted to the flashed of the cameras that were shoved in her face whilst judgement and rude comments were thrown her way. But even 9+ years of acting could never help her get used to the crude comments and stalkers. She did quickly learn that it was something you ground your teeth and tightened your jaw and got through.

It was at an award show that y/n met him. She’d been sitting at the bar, during the afterparty. Stirring her drink for 10 minutes, she placed her elbow on the bar top and her chin in her palm; avoiding touching her face as much as she could.

The loud chatter behind her only got louder as the soft music, Ludovico Einaudi if she wasn’t mistaken, began to play. The night had exhausted her, the conversations with numerous fellow actors and actresses and the long conversation with her good friend and co-star Daneel Ackles. Y/n stifled her yawn, however uncomfortable that was and sat up straight, hoping no one noticed her slouch.

“Would you mind terribly if I joined you Miss Y/L/N?” The voice didn’t sound familiar at first.

Swiftly turning her head towards the voice while being mindful of her hair so as not to mess it up since she didn’t need anymore humiliating pictures of herself online, she smiled and nodded upon finally recognizing the gentleman before her.

“Oh I really wouldn’t” she smiled kindly.

“thank you” he slipped off his jacket and set it on his chair, before sitting down and ordering his drink.

“Have you enjoyed this lovely evening?” Tom asked her as he sipped on his drink.

“I did, did you?” she smiled” oh and its Y/n by the way”

“Oh I know, I’ve seen your movies, you’re brilliant honestly, I mean it really is no surprise you win majority of the times you’re nominated”

If it wasn’t for his mentioning of it, Y/n was sure she would’ve forgotten her award on the bar top and not realized it till she was home. It wasn’t because she didn’t care, she did, but she was far to exhausted mentally and physically to fathom her win.

It started off as occasional meetings from then on. Tom would every now and then invite her to the theatre where he would frequently be apart of Shakespeare plays and she would often invite Tommy to the numerous promotional events held for the TV show she was in.

Then they started inviting each other to their homes, talking walks together, Y/n even occasionally babysat Bobby when Tom would be busy or away.

“What are you buying that antique table for?” he plopped down on the couch next to Y/n , who was lost in the online world of antique stores.

“Because I just want to Thomas” Y/n sighed as she got up to grab her wallet.

“But darling do you need it?”

“No Tom, I want it” she smiled while typing away the credentials online.

Tom had soon learned, few months into their friendship that his best friend seemed a little to used to getting whatever she wanted, he didn’t particularly have an issue, however he just didn’t understand buying excessive things.

“alright” he picked up the remote and switched through the channels.

It was a regular occurrence for Y/n to get things she didn’t need. It was a habit she didn’t know how to break.

“What do you think?” Y/n turned the laptop towards Tom, who raised his brows.

“I think you don’t need the table darling. It really isn’t a requirement” He softly said.

“Jesus fine” she sighed rolling her eyes. Her friend’s persistence that she didn’t need another antique table wasn’t wrong, but she wasn’t used to anyone telling her she didn’t need to buy something because she didn’t need it.

She clicked and typed away. And one phone call later she turned to Tom who finally found something he wanted watch on TV.

“There, cancelled my order. Are you happy now Mr. You don't need it” she rolled her eyes and smiled slightly.

Y/n remembered the day by lake like it was seconds ago.

They’d decided to go on a drive since both of them had the day off and wanted to step out for a bit. With the sun bright and the air warm, the lake was the prefect idea. It would be quiet and serene, just what both Tom and Y/n would certainly cherish after their exhausting week working.

The grass was damp and cool under her toes,the smell of the lake wafting through the air as the sounds of water trickling tickled their ears. With her shoes in her hand; Y/n trailed behind Tom towards the lake.

The trees stood tall as they walked past them hands interwind, Y/n held Toms hand to keep from stumbling. Tom held Bobby’s leash with his other hand, as his dog trotted in front of him.

They’d found a dry spot to sit, with their knees close to their chests, Y/n put her shoes down, while Tom looked up at the sky and Bobby sat down in between Tom and Y/n with his paw resting on Y/n’s foot.

They weren’t sure when they’d begun talking, but their conversation drifted with Tom speaking of his childhood memories of getting lost in the forest as a child, and Y/n’s eyes brightening and her laughter echoing in Tom’s ear. Y/n told him stories about her childhood, things she’d never disclosed to anyone before.

They’d laughed till the sun went down a little and it reminded Y/n of something.

She decided maybe she could tell him. She hadn’t shown anyone this before. It was her little secret and they weren’t very far from it anyway.

“Come on” She got up and dusted the back of her dress, whilst pulling Tom up and grabbing her shoes.

“what ? where?” Tom dusted his pants as well, placing Bobby back on his leash he followed Y/n, with a confused expression.

“I’ll show you in a minute” she chuckled at his confusion and impatience.

“oh dear” he mumbled

“what?”

“I’m being led somewhere in the middle of the forest, and you won’t tell me where, Darling I have to admit, it doesn’t sound like it’s going to end very well” Tom joked

“Tom I’m 5′5 and you’re 6′4, I couldn’t murder you even if I wanted to, plus Bobby needs his father” Y/n rolled her eyes.

Tom’s chuckle almost made her stop in her tracks, he sounded beautiful. Her chest ached, and she decided to keep moving, not wanting to think about it any further.

“Alright I see cabins”

“Remember how I always go away every few months and I don’t tell anyone where?” she breathed out “this is where I come”

“Hold on, you come to a cabin? I thought you flew out somewhere” he laughed out, his blue eyes shining.

“Nope, no flying anywhere” She pulled him by his hands towards one of the cabins. There were 4 cabins next to each other, she headed to the the second last one. Climbing the short steps and opening her purse she pulled out her key, while Tom looked around. Taking in the view. It seemed as though only 2 of the other cabins were in use.

Pushing the wooded door, Tom and Y/n stepped in, Tom noticed there were stairs leading to another level. A brown leather couch and fireplace fell under his gaze while he walked in further, not missing the way the entire cabin was furnished.

“So you....rent the cabin out every month?” Tom said slowly following y/n into the kitchen.

“oh I didn’t rent it, I bought it” she smiled, knowing he would’ve said something about it being unnecessary. But he didn’t. Instead he walked towards the large the glass window in the living room and looked out.

“It’s raining, you think we can spend the night here and leave when it stops raining?” he asked her.

“yeah of course, there's food and everything here”

“Bobby” Tommy called out to his spaniel, who poked his furry head from behind the couch.

“I know you’re afraid of the rain buddy” Tom kneeled down and picked his dog up and held him in his arms and slowly sat on the couch. Bobby adjusted himself on the couch and curled up next to his father.

“It looks quite beautiful doesn’t it?” Tom whispered to Y/n when she sat down next to him with a cup of hot chocolate for both of them.

“It really is”

They conversed while the rain poured harder. Tom noticed the way they were both sitting so close, and he almost shifted away a little. But he didn’t want to. He kept glancing at her lips as she talked about her upcoming panel with the rest of her co-stars.

“Jensen didn’t know about i-”she stopped talking when she noticed Tom’s flickering towards her lips every now and then. He didn’t want to wait any longer, nothing good came out of waiting too long and he’d waited too long anyway.

They leaned in, the cold air turned warm, his lips molded with her perfectly, she slipped her fingers to the back of Tom’s head and let his hair slide between her fingers as he held her face with his hands. His warm palms made her feel dizzier than she already felt.

That was 9 months ago. 9 months ago when she knew what she wanted and she knew she wanted him. But she didn’t just want him, she needed him. He made her so much better as a person. And he wanted her. He needed her.

It seemed so clear then, yet here she was 9 months later wondering if she and Tom were making the right decision.

She’d realized, unsurprisingly that though her relationship with Tom was filled with bliss and love, it was undoubtedly difficult considering not only was the media unforgivingly ruthless in trying to get any insight into their relationship, but they did so by spreading the nastiest possible rumors aimed at Y/n.

She handled it initially, but as the weeks progressed, it became increasingly harder having to live with the constant anxiety that anything she did could be twisted into some sort of inane rumor.

It started to seem as though she and Tom were the only people who supported their own relationship; her own parents, disliked Tom. They didn’t like that he had helped their daughter grow into a more giving person. Y/n’s parents felt as though Tom made their daughter into someone they did not raise her to be. They did not like that she was growing in ways where they (her parents) were not involved.

The days when Tom and Y/n would decide to meet made Y/n feel a sense of dread. She loved him undoubtedly, but she also couldn’t help being torn between her lover and her parents happiness.

Tom started to feel the weight of the media’s pressure a little later on. But he felt it nonetheless.

He constantly worried that the pressure was taking a toll on his girlfriend. He could see it, even if she refused to say it; he saw it in her sudden irregular sleep schedule. He saw the stress of their relationship in the dark circles under her eyes, the excessive coffee cups and the slowly dimming eyes. It was obvious in the way she began to drag herself in the mornings to set when usually she’d look forward to filming the next day.

Completely aware of his girlfriend’s parents view of him as well, Tom realized he had to speak to Y/n. He couldn’t let their relationship affect her mental health any longer than it already had.

Sitting at the kitchen table, Y/n put down her phone as she grasped her cup of coffee.

She’d be seeing Tom today, the dread that spread through her chest could not be helped. Y/n loved him beyond words, but holding Tom back in a place that wasn’t good for him, wasn’t fair to him in any aspect; she thought.

When Tom stepped foot into y/n’s home, he felt his hand feel clampy. Letting Bobby of the leash; Tom walked into the kitchen and kissed Y/n on the forehead and let his lips linger against her forehead for a second before stepping back and looking at her.

He almost backed out-from bringing up a conversation he knew was going to hurt both of them.

But he blurted it out in the next few seconds, and they sat at the marbled counter, elbows grazing each others while the darkness spilled into the day outside their window.

Dread built up in Y/n chest as the seconds slipped away. It was the unspoken Tom and Y/n had let sink in better than the spoken. There was only one way that this day ended, and both of them knew that. The conversation was only to delay the hurt that would inevitably come.

“I love you Darling, and I truly hope you understand that I adore you-tremendously” gazing into his girlfriends tearful eyes, his throat felt like it was closing in.

“I know” whispering those two simple yet heavy words Y/n stood up and hugged him. She didn’t know how she’d proceed in the following days without him. She couldn’t just forget someone who’d taught her so much. He held her tightly, a part of him hoping maybe if he just held her and didn’t let go it would be enough to make everything work out.

But it wasn’t. And he knew it. They knew it. They knew that they’re months of bliss were over, it didn’t matter how in love they were, or how much their hearts broke. Y/n would have to go to set the next day and push herself through filming the next day even though her chest would be hollow. Tom would go to the theater the next day and force himself through his Shakespeare plays and glance around the audience every now and then even though he knew she wouldn’t be there.

Y/n’s urge grew stronger the closer Tom got to the front door; to pull him back and stop him. the tears spilled heavily as her hands grew cold and each footstep felt like pinpricks. How was she to know? that love hurt to the point where your mind went blank and all you can remember is the life you had with him?

Though he tried to keep his composure, Tom pulled Y/n in for a hug before he left for good. And when he stepped foot out of her door, he couldn’t even make to his car before he broke down. He sobbed whilst he got into his car and almost began to drive before he wiped his tear stricken eyes. But the longer he stayed the harder it would, so he slipped out of her driveway and onto the path that would take him further away from her.

She didn’t speak of him to anyone, not even her parents, a part of her was always angry at them for contributing to their reasons for breaking up. She closed up and almost felt like throwing up whenever she saw pictures of him with another girl, but he wasn’t hers anymore. A year later everyone expected Y/N Y/L/N the phenomenal actress to move on. She’d become more straightforward. And so at an event she was questioned about her and Tom; not before the interviewer gushed about how she thought Y/n and Tom were great together and was sad they broke up , Y/n didn’t beat around the bush. All she said was “That was between me and him, thank you for your opinion” smile and proceeded to walk away.

She only forced herself to be half the woman she was before she and Tom split up. But even she knew she wasn’t the same. Y/n thought of him more often than he probably did; or so she thought. Tom read a page of Shakespeare each day from the 1725 version of his sonnets that Y/n had got her hands on and bought him for his birthday. He remembered badgering about the price, refusing to leave her alone until she told him the price. He knew however that the fact that it was an old antique version, it was nowhere under a thousand. He treasured it, not because it was Shakespeare but because it was y/n who gave it to him.

She never picked up her bottle of perfume she’d left over at his house, so Tom placed it on his highest shelf. He missed her beyond expression and often spoke of her to his mother even 3 years later.

Y/n’s Parent’s weren’t thrilled to see that they’re daughter had only distanced herself even more.

“Why don’t you look at another car?” her mother suggested, one evening.

“Why?”

“well you’ve only got one car, it wouldn’t hurt your image if you got another better one and drove that one out”

“I don’t need another car, what am I supposed to do with 2 cars, the one I've got is getting me places isn’t it? It’s doing what its meant to, I don't need another one” Y/n placed her cup of coffee down.

Sitting on the other end of the couch her father rolled his eyes, he didn’t think Y/n’s new habits she learned from her ex-boyfriend would carry on even after they broke up. But apparently they did.

“Anyways, once I’m done filming this year I’m taking a break” Y/n picked up her empty coffee mug and got up and walked to the kitchen.

“Oh come one, It’s been 3 years, will you ever move on from him? Tom was a passing cloud, move on Y/n!” her father snapped.

“I’m taking a break after filming whether you approve or not, and I absolutely do not have to explain to you my reasons for needing a break dad” remaining calm and polite was becoming increasingly harder whenever someone brought up the fact that she hadn’t moved on more than a few months later.

If it wasn’t that she’d already not attended about 4 award events, Y/n almost didn’t attend this one either. But she’d been talked into it by her management and plus, she’d been nominated for an award anyway. She’d mentally prepared herself for the long night ahead.

It was the usual loud and lively event. Y/n had given a few interviews, smiled through the photos, the award ceremony and through her acceptance speech. As she walked back to her seat with her award carelessly held in a loose grip, she looked up momentarily from the ground where she was trying to watch her steps so as not to trip, and allowed her gaze to fall on the suited up gentleman.

Tom applauded as he heard her name announced as the winner, he didn't doubt her win, and he was proud. He watched as she very carefully walked back to her seat, he remembered the way Y/n was always so scared of tripping at award events-where her fall could be caught by numerous cameras. Smiling at her, he didn’t expect her to look up, had he seen it coming he would’ve looked away.

Her eyes were as kind as he remembered. The way she held the award; Tom knew she didn’t really care. Which confused him a little since she’d always been overjoyed and proud when she won an award, her smile was as homely and comforting as it was the day he met her. He missed her greatly. Just as he smiled at her, she returned his smile with a small one of her own and quickly walked ahead.

When the main event was finally over, as tempted as Y/n was to just head home, she also wanted a drink and she’d promised a few of her friends she’d be at the . So instead she headed to the afterparty and sat down at one of the empty round tables.

She placed her purse on the table, and curled her fingers around the glass of the golden-ish liquid. Y/n did her best to remain interested in whatever it was her friends and former co-star was talking about, but she couldn’t. All she could do was focus on the figure behind her former co-star, sitting on the table beside theirs. It felt as though he was so close yet so far away.

Tom itched to get up mid conversation with Hugh and walk over to Y/n; sitting right next his table, but she herself was immersed in a conversation as was he.

When Hugh finally got up to get another round of drinks, Tom swiftly got up and walked over to Y/n’s table-which luckily she was the only one at and was no longer speaking to anyone else.

“Would you mind terribly if I joined you ?” He almost smiled, when he purposely framed his question the way he did the first time he met Y/n.

“Oh Christ” she flinched and brought her hand up to her chest “scared the crap out of me Tom, and oh I really wouldn’t”

Both of them chuckled, relieved that they were in a place where they could lighten things up with each other.

“How have you been?” Tom smiled, watching her carefully. Y/n did always have a knack for-well not exactly being honest about how she was doing and brushing it off and saying she was fine even when she wasn’t.

“Im fi- ah you won’t believe me will you?” she raised her brows and laughed.

“No, I wouldn’t. I haven’t forgotten your-habit” he smile was sad

“Alright then, I have been alright. Could be better but, well it is what it is” before he could get a word out she continued on to ask “what about you? How have you been?”

“I’ve certainly been better. Thank you for asking darling”

The small talk and formality in their tones almost hurt them, to go from knowing each other so well and loving each other, to becoming strangers with familiar smiles.

Y/n gazed at his blue eyes longingly. Missing seeing them in the morning as he woke up next to her. She’d missed everything about him; the gentle whiff of his cologne she could recognize anywhere, the way he’d adjust his tie or his glasses.

“Do you think it would’ve worked out?” Y/n blurted out after they’d been conversing for almost half an hour.

Tom didn’t have ask her what she was talking about. She only voiced the question he’d asked himself almost everyday.

“Truthfully” he sighed “ I don’t know. Sometimes I think it would have, but that’s just wishful thinking I suppose” he’d been looking at the tablecloth the entire time, but when he finally did look up at her, he was hit with the urge to kiss her. But he couldn't. Right?

“I don’t think it is. I feel as though maybe we could have” she was looking at him with unhindered emotion of love. She felt for him as strongly even now 3 years later.

With one hand resting on her purse and the other on her lap, Y/n looked at him while he rested one hand on the table while the other slipped towards Y/n’s knee.

“Y/n” his voice lowered as his hands caught hers on her thigh “ do you think, 3 years later we’d handle us better?” Y/n knew exactly what he was asking her, and it wasn’t whether she could handle the heat from others if they got back together.

Tom smiled as he held his cup of tea in one hand, and scrolled through Instagram in the other. He had the day off; to rest from the award event he’d attended the previous night. And while he’d usually sleep in on days off, he had a surge of energy he hadn’t had in a while.

“Darling have you seen this?” he tilted his phone towards Y/n who had just walked into the kitchen with his shirt hanging loosely off of her shoulders and grabbed her cup of tea.

“No I haven’t seen my phone yet, what is it?” sipping on the tea, she raised her brows at Tom.

“here” Y/n eyed the image of herself and Tom gazing at each other, while he spoke. Even through the image, the softness and familiarity didn’t go unnoticed. Y/n realized that she and Tom had been photographed in the same moment she answered his question.

“I do, but don’t take my word for it. We’re not going to know unless we try” she smiled.

#tom hiddleston fanfiction #tom hiddleston #Tom Hiddleston Request #tom hiddelston x reader #tom hiddleston angst #tom hiddelston imagine #tom hiddleston one shot #tom hiddleston drabble #tom hiddleston loki #tom hiddleston x y/n #tom hiddleston x you #tom hiddleston x actress!reader #Thomas William Hiddleston #tom hiddleston x reader #I apologize for whatever the fuck this is

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secretlywritingstories · 2 years

Text

security! | phan one shot

Summary: Dan comes home to Phil after tour rehearsals. They cook, kiss and banter. And Dan reflects on the word “security”.

Tags: Established relationship, 2022!phan, domestic fluff, tour rehearsals for we’re all doomed, cooking, kissing, banter

Word count: 3k

No warnings

Written as a surprise gift for @azuphere, who has been following my writing for years and always leaves such lovely comments that absolutely melts my heart.

Read on AO3 or below

Half of the time it didn’t feel real. He was going on tour again. He was going on a solo comedy tour. He’d always privately chuckled when the media had called him a comedian, but he supposed that it fit better now. He was going to stand on a stage and tell stories in a funny way. He’d done so for years online, even if not as much in the last few years.

Part of him still expected it all to fold like a house of cards. He was bracing himself to see it all crumble around him, even though they were now officially in rehearsals for the tour. It would start very soon. It was less than a month away. Several stops on the tour sold out and it still didn’t quite like it would happen.

Dan supposed that the pandemic has made him even more sceptic than he was before. All of his will-they-won’t-they projects had scarred him too. He wouldn’t admit so out loud, but it was the inevitable truth. They fed into that little insecure voice in the back of his head that he’d worked so hard to shut up for years. The one telling him that he wasn’t good enough. That his ideas were shit and that was why it never panned out. He was being punished for something, slapped back in the face when he was only trying to create something cool that could make people laugh and relax for a moment.

It’s a very nasty voice.

But thankfully, he lived with a much kinder one.

Not that Phil actually said words of encouragement verbally that often. He was shy and slow with his sincere words and when he did choose to say them, it always hit like a tonne of bricks. Dan was simply not equipped to handle it. He’d gotten better over the years but it’s still not easy.

He was away from Phil these days more than he’d like to be. Rehearsals were a full day out of the house and he came home exhausted and just wanting to curl up on the sofa, or rather in Phil’s arms.

Phil was already waiting with open arms to pull him right in. He’d also insist that they had dinner together, whether Dan felt up for it or not.

“You need all the energy you can get,” he said, and reached out to shake out the vegetables and ground meat in the pan. Often, they would indulge in getting delivery. It was expensive and not always the healthiest but it was easy and convenient.

Not tonight though. Phil had already been prepared to make fajitas by the time Dan stepped through the front door.

Dan watched him cook and tried not to think about how this recipe is one of the only ones so ingrained into their brains that they didn’t need a recipe on hand. They’d made this for a long time, it had followed them ever since the Manchester days. It wa simple and tasty and most importantly quick and easy.

Both of them really liked it when cooking was quick and easy. You’d not make a culinary chef out of either of them, but Dan still liked being in the kitchen while they cooked together. Not that he was much help tonight.

He’d shoved some stuff out of the way and hopped right up on the counter, almost hitting his shins in the process. Phil had done a fond eye roll when he thought that Dan wasn’t looking. It was his first mistake. Dan was always looking, even more so now that he had spent almost nine hours without Phil.

It’s far too long for them, and he was not the only one who thought so.

Phil had a lot of stuff to update him on, all the little random thoughts that he’d had throughout the day felt like they had piled up and been stacked, ready to unpack when Dan returned home.

He’s shared a home with this man for over a decade now and yet domestic moments like this could still punch him right in the stomach in the best way. He got to sit in his kitchen in his own house, after a long day of preparing for an exciting and nerve-wracking creative project and watch the love of his life cook.

All the misery he endured during his youth faded away in comparison to the brightness of this future.

“Are you even listening?” Phil asked, snorting fondly like he’d already worked out that Dan’s brain had checked out.

“Sorry,” Dan said, blinking a couple of times to see if that could help make him feel more alert. It seemed to just make him sleepier. “Tired. You were saying something about a sponsorship? A new one or a repeat offer?”

Phil shook his head and pushed the pan off the head and went to get the tortillas out of the microwave. For years they’d done them in the oven but then they figured out that they could just as easily do it in the microwave with the same, if not better results.

Dan supposed that some things had changed then. Just like him and Phil, it was still the same recipe but they’d found ways to improve here and there.

“New one. Not Safe For Work products, if you get what I mean,” Phil said, moving the tortillas onto cold plates. “As if they expect me to just whip it out on camera, I could barely get away with the singing pickle!”

“Wait, whip what out? Your dick or a product?” Dan asked, leaning back on his elbows and shooting Phil a wolfish grin. He knew perfectly what Phil had meant but it was entirely too fun to tease him. It was fun how he could still get flustered like this. Inside of the bedroom, he was almost entirely unshakable, so Dan would delight in teasing outside of it.

“Their product,” Phil said, clicking tongs at Dan with a snapping motion. “Mind out of the gutter, Howell.”

Dan didn’t answer, he just threw his head back and laughed. It felt good to be home.

He did like rehearsing and he knew he’d also love touring again. He had experienced it before, how it gave him a sense of purpose to have a very set schedule to adhere to and something specific to accomplish each day. Others might find it restricting but Dan found it rather freeing.

He didn’t have to figure out what to do all on his own, how to fill his days with meaning. He’d put down a plan and then have to stick to it no matter what because people were depending on him and the audience would be waiting each shownight whether he felt ready or not.

Still, he’d never done this alone before. It had always been a huge comfort to have Phil next to him. He worried that he’d taken for granted that he could always just turn his head and right there would be Phil, who not only got exactly what Dan thought but likely felt the same as well.

He was really going to miss that.

“You are still joining for some of the tour, right?” Dan felt compelled to ask.

Phil turned around, leaving the food abandoned for now. It was hot and he should be continuing with it. Still, he didn’t hesitate for a moment to walk up to Dan and perfectly slot himself between his dangling legs bouncing slightly off the cupboards.

Dan was always a little taller than Phil, but he was even taller sitting on top of the counter like this. It made Phil lean in close and look up at him. Phil’s hands found Dan’s thighs, a soft but steady grip. Dan stopped swinging his legs.

It had been so many years of looking into these eyes and Dan’s breath still caught in his throat. Phil’s undivided attention was intoxicating and it made Dan’s whole body feel warm.

“Rehearsals messing with your head?” Phil asked, instead of answering.

Dan hadn’t thought they did, but he realised that Phil was right. It was because of rehearsals that he was worried. It even went well today. The crew were nice and fun to work with, and Dan had never had trouble performing in front of an audience. But he had never done something this big or for this long all on his own.

He was excited for this solo project but so many years spent working with Phil wasn’t something he could just shed so easily. It had been ingrained into him. It was arguably healthier for them now to have a bit of distance and move away from the brand of Dan and Phil, so they could just be themselves. It allowed them to be just Dan and just Phil in their own little bubble.

Still. Change was scary.

“Maybe a bit,” Dan confessed.

Phil’s hands moved up from Dan’s thighs to touch his face. His hands smelled like fajitas and it made Dan’s nose tingle a little but he held still under Phil’s touch.

“Even the stops where I’m not there, I’ll always be only a phone call away. You know that,” Phil said, and then he was leaning up to press a soft kiss to Dan’s lips.

Phil didn’t have to get quite up on tiptoes to reach but he still did it, leaning more of his weight onto Dan. It felt grounding and like he had something tangible to hold up on. Dan’s hands found Phil’s hips and he held him close, even though he made no move to deepen the kiss.

He just wanted to make it linger.

“Food is getting cold,” Phil said, speaking against Dan’s lips. Dan couldn’t see it but he could feel how Phil’s mouth was curled up into a smile.

Part of Dan just wanted to trap Phil with his legs and hands and just keep him here. Kiss him silly until they were breathless and then drag him into their shared bed. Another part of him was also really hungry and the food was getting cold.

Food and sex were two things that made him happy. Having them with Phil made him extra happy.

It would be much easier to ignite the spark between them, than reheating the food Phil had just gone through the effort to make.

“Stop being distracting then,” Dan said and lightly slapped Phil’s shoulder and shoved him back.

Phil giggled, clearly pleased with himself, as he turned his attention back to the food. Dan jumped down from the counter, flinching a little as his feet connected. That didn’t feel great on his ankles. His butt had also fallen asleep. Maybe he was getting old.

It was nowhere near as scary a thought, as it had once been. After all, he was not ageing alone.

Dan helped get the mixture into the tortillas and then they relocated to the living room, plates and drinks in hand. Some days, they made the effort to sit at their fancy dining table that could seat way too many people, but they did often end up in front of the television while having dinner. They’d put on a show and only pay half attention, but it was a time-honoured tradition.

The fajitas were good, and they hadn’t cooled off too much. It didn’t take Dan much time to get sleepy afterwards, and cuddle up next to Phil. He could fall asleep right then and there, even though he knew it would mess with his back and only cause Phil to have to wake him up and actually drag him into bed.

A notification went off on his phone, a reminder that he’d made for himself.

“Can you read it for me?” Dan asked, as he couldn’t be arsed.

Phil’s face was coded into Dan’s phone too, just like his finger print had been on a previous phone and just like he still knew the code to open it. The same was true the other way around. They respected each other’s privacy and never went swooping, and it was much more convenient to be able to get into each other’s phones.

“It says you need to send a tweet about a Back To School giveaway for tour,” Phil said and then handed Dan his phone.

He let out a groan but accepted the phone all the same. It was one thing he had absolutely not missed about having a big project out. He hated having to do promo for it. He’d been a self-made creator for so many years and it was always daunting to entrust his words into someone else’s hands. He could never be sure that they would tell the same story that Dan was trying to get across.

Doing a giveaway was on the better side of promo. It meant that he could give a viewer who might not otherwise get the chance, an opportunity to see the show and meet him. It always felt good when he could give a bit back to the people who’d allowed him to have these opportunities in the first place.

“Right, I promised to do that tonight. Ugh,” Dan said but heaved himself off of Phil and the sofa and went to fetch his laptop to check where he’d put that coded link. It thankfully didn’t take him too long to find and he was so tired that he didn’t overthink his caption too much.

This was going to be an early night for him, he could already tell. He guessed that was what he got for having to get up early and jump on the tube to travel to the rehearsal space. He would much rather start his day in the late morning than bright and early.

“Done!” he proclaimed once it was sent off.

“Well done,” Phil said, still from his spot on the couch.

Dan stretched his hands behind his back, hearing an audible click. His body seemed to have more and more places where it suddenly clicked. Dan forced himself to his feet, just to take a glass of water and brush his teeth, so he wouldn’t feel guilty about forgetting later.

He’d left his phone on the coffee table next to Phil, and once he came back, he saw a notification from @AmazingPhil on his lockscreen and Phil was wearing a proud smirk.

“What did you do?” Dan asked with a raised eyebrow.

He knew it wouldn’t be anything bad. Those days of confessing too much on Twitter were long behind them. Deleted now, but never truly gone. They’d learned that lesson the hard way. Now it was mostly teasing and banter whenever they replied to each other publicly. They trusted each other’s judgement implicitly.

“Why don’t you check?” Phil asked, eyes all innocent.

It was a cute reply. Very Phil. Joking that he’d clicked on the link by mistake and now might have to meet Dan in Toronto. If things went according to plan, he would indeed accompany Dan during part of the US and Canadian tour. It was far too long to be without his partner.

“So, you’re going to steal a spot from one of our lovely viewers?” Dan asked, all mock offended and dramatically.

“Says the guy who came in second during my quiz for our viewers!” Phil shot back. “You nearly won! Imagine if you had!”

“Then don’t make a quiz on my area of expertise,” Dan argued, while he opened twitter to type a reply.

“It was a quiz about me!” Phil argued, laughing between words.

“Exactly! My area of expertise,” Dan repeated and sent off the tweet. Just a single word. “Now come here, you little meddler,” he added and tossed his phone aside to get his hands on Phil instead.

It started as an attempted tickle attack but it quickly turned into something else entirely and they stumbled their way into the bedroom.

It was only later, both of them shirtless and sweat cooling off under the air condition they’d put on, that Phil noticed Dan’s reply to his tweet. They’d gone on their phones, just a final time before falling asleep, and Phil had let out a snort.

“Oh, I’d love to see you calling security on me,” Phil said.

“Don’t tempt me, I will,” Dan said, with a poker face, but they both knew he was joking. Phil hit him on the shoulder and then snuggled closer, even though it was almost too hot. At least the horrible heatwave had somewhat left London now. It was slowly getting better.

Some days it really did feel like the world was ending. Dan had always known he was only half joking about the title of his tour. A lot of bad things were going on in the world, but even so, he didn’t fully think that everyone was doomed.

Not as long as kindness and beauty still existed in the world.

Phil fell asleep quickly, not one to be kept up too late but thoughts running around his brain on repeat. Dan envied that, but he had also learned to get better at it. Tonight, he was so tired that he could just knock out but still he found himself opening Twitter and going to his own profile.

security!

A single word. Lowercase. Exclamation mark.

Phil had caught the joke instantly. It was obvious. Dan was pretending he was calling on security because Phil would sneak into the meet and greet. It was right there and it was meant to be easy to understand.

But still, Dan’s brain was good at fixating and twisting things around in all the ways it could be seen.

Security didn’t just mean security personnel. It also meant to be free from threat and danger. It was one of the reasons that Dan wanted Phil to come along too. For security. He never felt quite as safe as with him nearby.

Most of it was bullshit because if a threat popped up, neither he or Phil could do much about it. They weren’t exactly fighters by nature. But there was a strength in their bond and no challenge felt quite so big that they couldn’t handle it as long as they were together.

After that thought, sleep came easy, cuddled up next to Phil.

They were each other’s security.

#Phanfic #phanfiction #domestic fluff #domestic phan #my stories

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crazykuri · 2 years

Note

This reminds me of a couple months ago, when Tom was filming exterior shots for TCR, and Twitter was being vile towards him, and his appearance. Tweeting about him non stop and how ugly they thought he looked, tagging Zendaya in tweets, asking her why she’s dating him. Then the next day, Zendaya liked that post praising Tom for being true to the character he’s playing and focusing on humanity vs. vanity. I’m sure Twitter doesn’t remember that today. 🙄

Hmmm pretty sure they see those nasty “hit tweets” about them and maybe they’re even aware of those weird news articles like that one relating his Budapest visit to Taylor Swift (edit: weird TO ME. just giving an example of annoying things I read online!) It’s great that he chooses to delete the app every now and then (he’s mentioned this a few times already so you know deleting social media apps helps him a lot) and it’s also good that he returns for important stuff 🤍 (like the fact that he’d be back on September 1st, jk). Idk what Twitter has been saying. I’m guessing they’re being “sympathetic” now? That’s always the case when Tom talks about his mental health. Of course they’d once again b* about his poor shoe choices or something in a few days but whatever. Tumblr aint different, tho? Some anons are being very weird, and antis are using this charity video to invalidate Tom & Z’s relationship. 🥴 I don’t know what my main point is really. Glad he has a way to protect his mental health. Seems like I’m not getting the haircut insta story after all. 🥲 And I hope he comes back soon

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deeranger · 3 years

Text

Fic Writer Questions!

@oddsocksandstuff tagged me in this, thank you so much, sweetie! ❤️

1) How many works do you have on AO3? I’ve got 40 so far (of which 25 are SPN fics). There’s more to come!

2) What’s your total AO3 word count? 486,667, apparently. That tells me each of my fics has an average wordcount of 12,166.675… Seems about right. I was never any good at keeping things short.

3) How many fandoms have you written for and what are they? Uhh… On AO3 I’ve written for Supernatural, Supernatural RPF, X-men (Cherik) and McFassy (James McAvoy/Michael Fassbender). But I’ve written a lot when I was younger that has never made it online, including NCIS, Pirates of the Caribbean, and lots of weird one-shorts starring everyone from Michael J. Fox to Kevin Sorbo from “Hercules: The Legendary Journeys”. 🤨

4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos? “A Lesson to be Taught” – an SPN Wincest pwp fic where a dominant Dean fucks (and spanks) Sam and they discover that Dean apparently has a daddy!kink. Comes with a photo manipulation too! There be dick.

“Taking Game” – a semi-dark medieval Cherik (Charles Xavier/Erik Lehnsherr from X-men) AU. Basically, Charles is a poacher hunting on king Erik’s land to his great dismay. And so, he’s captured and gets the choice between losing his life or serving the king for a bit… Dubcon and smut ensues. “Only Like This” – a little SPN Wincest dub-con fic about hopelessly pining Dean doping Sam just so he can touch and kiss his oblivious little brother. It’s okay. Sam won’t remember when he comes to. “It’s Only Carnal” – A dark SPN Wincest noncon fic where soulless!Sam needs to blow off some steam. And when it comes to carnal activities his brother isn’t exactly a novice – so why not use Dean’s body to make them both feel good? “Demonized” – a long and dark af SPN noncon fic written in collaboration with the awesome @palishere. Sam is captured by some nasty demons who use him to lure in his brother. At first it seems the demonic scumbags are just really perverted and have a weakness for sexual torture, but they turn out to have ulterior motives…

5) Do you respond to comments, why or why not? Yes, always. I think it can be a bit demotivating for a reader to leave a comment and get zero response – and so, they might not bother to comment on the next fic. At least, that’s how I feel personally. And besides, I really want to let readers know that I appreciate them taking the time and effort to actually tell me what they think.

6) What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending? Oufff… Seriously? How can I possibly pick just one when 99.8 percent of my fics are not only dark af but have gut-wrenching ambiguous endings as well? I, err… I’m gonna have to think really hard about this one, hold on… *Insert buzzing cicada sound*… Uhh… Well, I guess it might be… “Play or Pay” – a dark female!reader-insert Wincest fic where demon!Dean has you and Sam trapped somewhere underground. Sam ends up being on the receiving end of the demon’s cruelty when he tries to save you. Using Dean’s body the demon ends up raping Sam while the reader tries to escape to get help... There’s a little twist in the end. Loads of dead dove here, including death (not Dean or Sam). “The Orange Hour” – where undercover inmate!Dean has to rape CO!Sam in order to save both of their lives and get them out of the jail in one piece. It doesn’t go completely as planned. (Comes with an nsfw photo manipulation). “Demonized” – loads of bottom!Sam torture, full of hurt and absolutely no comfort... It’s just… I dunno, I think I and @palishere had a collective meltdown in the noncon and angst department. Sorrynotsorry.

8) Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written? Nope, I’ve never in my life written a crossover. Usually, I’m too laser-focused on 1 obsession at a time. I can’t multitask, okay?

9) Have you ever received hate on a fic? Yes, the fandom purity police has visited me on AO3. The usual self-proclaimed know-it-alls vomiting their bullshit all over the comment section about how “problematic” noncon is and how “sick” I must be. I thought about moderating comments for a while, actually – but I just deleted their follow-up comments until they left me alone. 😤

10) Do you write smut? If so what kind? Yes!! Gimme! Usually, I write noncon smut or just good ol’ pwps that feature some sort of dominance. That’s it. That’s my jam. In general, the only smut I don’t write is the cute, fluffy, feel-good, cuddly stuff… My smut’s usually pretty rough and/or some sort of dub/noncon.

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen? Yes. Someone stole “It’s Only Carnal” and posted it as her own on some Portuguese fanfiction site. She even replied to comments, answered questions and talked about how much she loved writing it, etc… Luckily a sweet mutual on Tumblr let me know about it and I reported her for plagiarism. The stolen fic was taken down shortly after and the account deleted. Goddamn thief. 😡

12) Have you ever had a fic translated? Yes. Honestly, I can’t remember which fic(s). But people have contacted me on AO3 and asked for permission to translate my stuff into Chinese. I have - of course - happily allowed them to. It’s such an awesome compliment to get, I think!

13) Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yes, 2. “Demonized” and the fluffy Ficfacers prompt fic “The Masks We Wear” starring Sam and Dean taking their pranks a step too far. Basically, the brothers get angry with each other and they need to talk it out… No smut in this one, can you believe it?!! But that was kinda the prompt we received. The prompt was literally: “Sam and fluff”. Anyways, both fics are co-written with the lovely @palishere. You can find her AO3 here. 😊

14) What’s your all time favorite ship? Wincest!!! Definitely. Gimme all the brotherfucking, please. No contest. And coming in on second place I guess there’s Samifer – never paired consensually, though. I just love Lucifer messing with Sam’s head and torturing him in all kinds of cruel ways.

15) What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? Oh, that’s a mean question… I have a noncon WIP where Sam and Dean are in prison. I wrote a whole story outline, gathered my own little dictionary of prison slang, etc… But I never made it past page 10 or something. Sam was supposed to get jumped by a gang of inmates and then Dean was supposed to helplessly watch from the sideline, offering to trade places if they’d just leave his little brother alone… And after that it’s all about a mix of healing and vengeance… But the story has been lying on the shelf for more than a year and I doubt I’ll ever continue it. Oh, wait! I almost forgot – I have a long Cherik WIP sequel to “To Have and to Hold”! Just checked, its wordcount is 18,729! Holy crap…. What a waste, huh? But I honestly don’t think I’ll ever finish it, because I’m not into Cherik anymore. That ship has kinda sunk for me…. So, now I’m hyperfixating on Supernatural, yeah?

16) What are your writing strengths? Description, I think. I just love details and setting the mood. I like to think I’m pretty good at writing in English too even though it isn’t my native language… I wish to be better and expand my vocabulary but I’m doing okay nonetheless.

17) What are your writing weaknesses? Description, I think. Yes, you read correctly. I often describe things TOO much. Sometimes to the extent where the pacing gets so slowed down that I feel like the scene loses its ‘feel’. I don’t know if it’s just in my head, but that’s my major concern about my writing. That and my signature ambiguous endings, lol.

18) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? Love it. It can be difficult to pull off, but if you get it right it can be magical. Just don’t overdo it and make sure that the reader can follow. I don’t think I have any fics online where I do it, but I’m not a complete stranger to it either.

19) What was the first fandom you wrote for? Ack, my poor brain trying to go back to when I was friggin’ 13… You know how many years ago that was?! 25!!! Okay!? *Huffs*…. Anyway, I THINK it might’ve been Keanu Reeves’ character in “Johnny Mnemonic”. Or maybe David James Elliott’s character as Harmon Rabb in the early seasons of “JAG”. I dunno. Either way this question makes me feel really old and I don’t appreciate it. Don’t @ me. 😅

20) What’s your favorite fic you’ve written? That’s probably a tie between “The Orange Hour” and “It’s Only Carnal”. They’ve both got nice pacing and that’s my biggest challenge, I think. Also, I love the whole Morse code thing in “The Orange Hour”. I don’t even know what happened or how I came up with it, but hey, I can surprise myself if I want to, I guess! And of course there’s the smutty noncon and all of the hurt… So, those two fics are my personal faves. 😏

I’ll tag @jackandthesoulmates, @pinkoptics, @palishere, @wrenseroticlibrary, @decadent-prince, @negans-lucille-tblr, @juinae and @impala-dreamer and everyone else who feels like doing it! Feel free to ignore, of course.

#dee answers #fanfiction questions #personal

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jaskierswolf · 4 years

Text

The Grass is Greener Pt.1/3

Summary: Jaskier's mother is coming to stay and his garden is an absolute mess and his lawn mower has seen better days... luckily for him his ridiculously hot neighbour is there to lend a hand.

Geraskier

CW: Shitty parents being shitty.

(Prompted by @alwenarin and based on this post by @infinite-mirrors)

________

Jaskier stared forlornly out at his garden. His mother was due to come over on her yearly visit and the next few days of his life were going to be hell. His mother was the sort to blast into his life like a fucking tornado, pull apart everything that he had built for himself and leave him broken, shattered into a thousand shards of glass. He wasn’t even sure why he still let her in, probably some childhood trauma that meant he was desperate to please her, to make her proud, but what did he know? He wasn’t a therapist, much to her displeasure. Anything would have been better in her eyes than a musician and occasional bartender.

He didn’t make much money. His band hadn’t taken off yet and only really had a small but dedicated following online that donated pocket money in exchange for small previews of new tracks or little poems that could be given to lovers or in greetings cards. Most of his rent was paid for in the tips he made at the bar. He was lucky to have the house at all really. He shared it with his housemates: Priscilla, his bandmate and ex, Essi, her younger sister, Valdo Marx, his former schoolmate, professional rival and absolutely twat face who lurked in his attic room and never really came out to talk to them, and last but not least, Regis, a kind scholarly type who had been living in the house before the other rooms had become available and most importantly made excellent homemade gin.

Said housemates had agreed to fuck off for the weekend so he could pretend that the house was his in a last ditched attempt win over his mother.

Of course, none of them had helped to tidy up before leaving and he’d spent the last twenty-four hours deep cleaning the house, and bolting the door to Regis’s bathroom shut. The gin in the bathtub wasn’t ready to bottle yet and he wasn’t exactly going to drain the tub of his elixir. He’d moved the furniture in his friend’s rooms around enough to make it look like they weren’t extra bedrooms, more… rooms that just happened to have beds in case he had company. Priscilla’s room now resembled a music room, Essi’s room had been turned into a makeshift study, Valdo’s he’d left a mess and claimed it was just an attic, and Regis’s room was sort of a library if you squinted hard enough.

That just left the garden.

“Bollocks!” He moaned.

None of them really cared much about the garden, apart from the box down the end which housed Regis’s herb garden for cooking. The rest of the garden a mess. The grass was practically a wild meadow filled with weeds. He quite liked it. He enjoyed looking at the dandelions, daisies and buttercups but his mother would have a fit.

Where was he even going to start?

Lawnmower. They must have one. He stumbled through his back door onto the patio and made his way to the shed that honestly barely lived up to its name. It was falling apart and leaked horrendously, but luckily inside was one rusty looking lawnmower.

“Bingo!” He grinned and pulled the mower out of the shed. It was heavier than it looked but luckily Jaskier was also stronger than he looked. Even so he wasn’t entirely how he was going to start the damn thing.

Perhaps Geralt would know…

Fuck.

Geralt.

Geralt had just adopted a newborn baby. Her name was Ciri. Most of the time Geralt just called her ‘Cub’ which Jaskier found to be incredibly endearing, a fact that had nothing to do with his teensy little crush on the mechanic.

He pulled up Geralt’s number in his phone. He’d been delighted when Geralt had given him his number, yes maybe it was because Jaskier kept turning up at Geralt’s doorstep after shifts at work because he’d forgotten his keys and none of his bastard housemates were answering the door and Geralt just happened to have a spare key, but the main thing is he had Geralt’s number.

After that they’d conversed a few times over text. Mostly if one of them was running to the shops and wanted to know if the other needed anything. Occasionally Geralt would text to ask Jaskier if he could watch Ciri for a short while if Geralt needed to leave the house. Once Geralt had even given him a lift to work because Jaskier’s bike had gotten a flat tire and he didn’t have enough time to walk all the way to the bar. So they weren’t exactly strangers but he wouldn’t really call them friends.

In fact Geralt was still listed as Hot Neighbour in his phone. He meant to change it, it was just that you couldn’t argue with the truth. Geralt was his hot neighbour.

J —Hey Geralt! Is it ok if I mow my lawn? I don’t want to wake Ciri if she’s asleep. :)

He stared at his phone intently until about an eternity later, Geralt replied.

G — The child must not be an obstacle.

Jaskier snorted as he read the response. He read it aloud a couple of times trying to mimic Geralt’s rough husky voice and managed to give himself the giggles.

His phone buzzed again.

G — I can hear you laughing at me.

“Oh shit!” He almost dropped his phone and his cheeks felt like they were on fire. “Sorry Geralt!” He called into the air.

G— Hmm.

Jaskier scoffed. Who text back “Hmm”? And why did Jaskier still find that so attractive?

But never mind that! He had the green light. Operation Finally Make His Mother Proud, or FMHMP for short, and yes you could absolutely say that if you tried hard enough, was go! He was going to mow the lawn like a proper adult!

He tried for about six years to turn the mower on but without any success. He kicked the lawnmower in frustration and the whole damned thing fell apart.

“Fuck it!” He yelled as he hopped about on his good foot that hadn’t been battered by lawnmower.

He sulked back into the house and flopped down dramatically on the sofa. It was over. His mother was going to hate him and he would die as a disgrace to the Pankratz name and the Lettenhove estate.

He was half way through his pity party when the doorbell rang. He grabbed his phone to check the time. Strange, his mother wasn’t due for another three hours.

“What the fuck?” He mused and padded over to the door. To his surprise Geralt was standing on his doorstep with Ciri tucked safely into a baby sling on his chest and behind him was a shiny lawnmower. “Ah. Geralt!” He grinned.

Geralt turned to the lawnmower and back to him. “Thought you might need some help.”

Jaskier blushed. “Right. Yes. Of course. Come on in!” He stood back to let Geralt through. “Oh, actually do you want to come round the side gate? The lawnmower probably shouldn’t come through the house. I’ve just cleaned up.”

Geralt grunted but followed Jaskier around the side of the house and into the back garden.

“What the fuck, Jaskier?” He grumbled when he saw the state of the lawn. “I thought you said you were mowing the lawn, not trying to find it!”

“Ah, yes, well. That is an excellent point.” Jaskier stammered, pulling at the hem of his shirt nervously. “You see my mother is visiting.”

Geralt raised an eyebrow. “Your mother, how old are you? Twelve?”

Jaskier gaped at his neighbour. “Geralt!” He whined. “I’m twenty-nine! Mother is just a cow.”

“Hmm. Fine. Let’s do this.” Geralt pulled Ciri gently out of her sling and passed her to Jaskier. “Hold her. I need to grab her stuff. This will take longer than I thought.”

“Oh hang on!” Jaskier called after Geralt but it was too late and Ciri began to cry. “Umm. There there.” He cooed and rocked her gently. “Shall I sing you a lullaby, cub?”

She didn’t answer, babies rarely did, so he decided a lullaby would be fine and began to sing in hushed tones as he rocked her in his arms. Geralt wasn’t long but he seemed surprise to come back to Jaskier rocking his daughter to sleep in his arms.

“Hmm. She likes you.” Geralt noted.

He was carrying Ciri’s car seat and a bag was slung over his shoulder. In his other hand was a large electric contraption with some nasty blades at the end. He dumped the scary looking monster and placed the travel cot on the patio table. Once Ciri was safely asleep they got to work.

Or more accurately, Geralt got to work. Jaskier mostly just watched and made sure Geralt had all the refreshments he needed. He also kept the conversation going by listing all the grievances his mother had with him from her last visit, Geralt hummed and grunted but didn’t offer much in return but it didn’t matter. Jaskier was more than capable of holding an entire conversation by himself.

“And then she starts wittering on about how my sister has a perfect husband and a darling little angel.” Jaskier moaned. “So of course then it’s ‘Julian why don’t you have a wife?’”

“Julian?” Geralt asked.

Jaskier glared at his neighbour. “Don’t ever call me that, I beg of you.”

Geralt shrugged. “I won’t. Just asking.”

“And I tell her, for the hundredth time, to say partner or spouse or lover or you know… not gender specific because she knows! Geralt! She knows. I don’t know how many times I have to tell her.” Jaskier sighed. “Oh, umm I’m bisexual just to give you some context there.”

Geralt nodded. “Right.”

“So of course she starts complaining that I always have to make everything gay, and I’m like… ‘Mother, I am gay!’” Jaskier announced with wide arms.

Geralt looked up at him, pausing halfway down the lawn that was now starting to resemble a lawn. “So why not tell her you’re seeing someone?” He asked. “Solve both problems if you say it’s a guy.”

Jaskier put his hands on his hips and tilted his head. “Yeah.” He scoffed. “Until she asks to meet him.”

Geralt shrugged. “I could do it.”

Jaskier’s heart jumped in his chest. “You what? Geralt!”

“My ex has been bothering me about finding someone.” He grumbled. “Two birds, One stone.”

Jaskier narrowed his eyes at his insanely hot neighbour who was now apparently suggesting they… fake date??

“What exactly are you suggesting here?” Jaskier asked slowly. “You pretend to be my boyfriend for my mother’s visit and we what? Send a few photos to your ex to prove you’re moving on?”

Geralt smirked. “As long as you promise not to fall in love with me.”

Jaskier’s jaw dropped.

Well fuck. _______

#the witcher #geraskier #geraskier fanfiction #geralt of rivia #jaskier pankratz #geralt x jaskier #jaskier x geralt #geralt/jaskier #cirilla fiona elen riannon #ciri #dad geralt #surprise fake dating #I could be persuaded to write a second part #let me know if you want part 2 #Update there will now be three parts #ask and you shall receive #the grass is greener

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wiypt-writes · 4 years

Text

Stark Spangled Banner

Ch 14: Nothing Personal

Summary: Steve confronts Fury about the Lemurian Star mission and the Director reveals just exactly what it is he’s been working on. However, when Fury is later gunned down in Steve’s apartment right in front of the Captain and Katie, the two are forced to run from the very people they’ve called colleagues and friends for years.

Pairing: Steve Rogers x OFC Katie Stark

Warnings: Language! Violence.

A/N: I love this edit from @angrybirdcr

Disclaimer: This is a pure work of fiction and classified as 18+. Please respect this and do not read if you are underage. I do not own any characters in this series bar Katie Stark and the other OCs. By reading beyond this point you understand and accept the terms of this disclaimer.

Chapter 13

Stark Spangled Banner Masterlist // Main Masterlist

“You just can’t stop yourself from lying, can you?” Steve seethed as he crossed the floor of Fury’s office.

Nick didn’t even need to ask him what he was talking about. Without turning round the Director spoke calmly. “I didn’t lie. Agent Romanoff had a different mission than yours.”

“Which you didn’t feel obliged to share” Steve pressed, raising an eyebrow as the Director spun in his chair to face him.

“I’m not obliged to do anything” Fury replied simply, looking at him.

“Those hostages could’ve died, Nick.” Steve pressed, holding the man’s gaze.

“I sent the greatest soldier in history to make sure that didn’t happen.” Fury stated, and Steve could feel his temper rising even more. He hated the blasé attitude the Director was discussing the issue with, like it was simply something he wasn’t all that bothered about.

“Soldiers trust each other, that’s what makes it an army.” He said after a short pause. “Not a bunch of guys running around and shooting guns.”

He wasn’t expecting the response he got. Fury leaned forward, frowning as he levelled Steve with a look.

“The last time I trusted someone, I lost an eye.” Fury spoke, his tone steely. Steve cocked his head to one side, crossing his arms but maintaining his silence. “Look, I didn’t want you doing anything you weren’t comfortable with. Agent Romanoff is comfortable with everything.”

“I can’t lead a mission when the people I’m leading have missions of their own.” Steve pointed down at Fury’s desk, stressing his point.

“It’s called compartmentalization” Fury eyed him. “Nobody spills the secrets because nobody knows them all.” Steve snorted silently and gestured at Fury. “Except you.” Fury took a deep breath and levelled Steve with a look. “You’re wrong about me. I do share. I’m nice like that.” Steve frowned as Fury stood up and motioned for him to follow.

“Where are we going?” Steve’s frustration was evident on his tone.

“You’ll see.” Fury stepped inside the elevator. Steve followed. “Insight bay.”

A photo of Nick’s SHIELD ID flashed up on the screen, surrounded by a green light. Then Steve noticed his, but the light was red as the SHIELD computer spoke. “Captain Rogers does not have clearance for Project Insight.”

“Director override, Fury, Nicholas J.” Fury spoke, without missing a beat.

“Confirmed.”

The elevator started to moved downwards. Steve leaned against the rail which ran round the middle of the glass box and clasped his hands in front of him by his belt. Despite his initial annoyance, he had found himself beginning to understand what the Director was saying. SHIELD had so many secrets, many a matter of national security. It made no sense for everyone to know everything, it was a security risk, he got that. But it still irked him.

“You know, they used to play music.” Steve said, his tone softer as he broke the silence, making a joke at his own expense.

“Yeah. My grandfather operated one of these things for forty years.” Fury mused, somewhat nostalgic. “My granddad worked in a nice building, he got good tips. He’d walk home every night, roll of ones stuffed in his lunch bag. He’d say ‘hi’, people would say hi back. Time went on, neighbourhood got rougher. He’d say ‘hi’ they’d say, ‘Keep on steppin’. Granddad got to grippin’ that lunch bag a little tighter.”

The flash into Fury’s personal life surprised Steve somewhat. He cocked his head to one side and looked at the man. “Did he ever get mugged?”

“Every week some punk would say, “What’s in the bag?”

“What did he do?”

“He’d show ‘em. Bunch of crumpled ones and loaded point twenty-two Magnum.” Fury smirked “Granddad loved people. But he didn’t trust them very much.”

Steve had to smirk slightly, thinking that Fury sounded a hell of a lot like his grandpa. He looked down for a second, and when he looked up he was aware that they had now travelled down the side of the Triskellion and were descending further, underground even. As Steve looked around he realised he was in some sort of below building hangar, and he looked out of the glass, spotting three giant Helicarriers. His mouth fell open in surprise, his brow furrowing.

“Yeah, I know. They’re a little bit bigger than a point twenty-two.” Fury remarked.

Eventually the elevator stopped and Fury stepped out, Steve hot on his tail as he watched people bustling around the hangar shouting, carrying things, fixing things. The helicarriers were bigger than the one they’d used during the Chitauri invasion, each being able to house at least twenty Quinjets.

“This is Project Insight.” Fury explained as he led Steve across the floor of the hangar. “Three next generation Helicarriers synced to a network of targeting satellites.”

And then Steve understood. “Launched from the Lemurian Star.”

“Once we get them in the air they never need to come down. Continuous suborbital flight courtesy of our new repulsor engines.” Fury stopped underneath one.

“Stark?” Steve asked, frowning.

“Well, he had a few suggestions once he got an up close look at our old turbines.” Fury nodded, as they continued. “But don’t worry, that’s not something Nova is keeping from you.”

“I wasn’t” Steve said honestly, as he looked up and around the hangar. “I trust my girl.”

Fury looked at him before he turned his attention back to the matter in hand and pointed up again “These new long range precision guns can eliminate a thousand hostiles a minute. The satellites can read a terrorist’s DNA before he steps outside his spidy hole. We gonna neutralize a lot of threats before they even happen.”

Steve crossed his arms. “I thought the punishment usually came after the crime.”

“We can’t afford to wait that long.”

Steve could feel the nerve twitching in his jaw. “Who’s ‘we’?”

“After New York, I convinced the World Security Council we needed a quantum surge in threat analysis. For once we’re way ahead of the curve”

“By holding a gun at everyone on Earth and calling it protection?” Steve looked at the director, frowning. He didn’t like this. It smacked of something HYDRA would do.

Fury picked up on his tone and he looked at Steve, arching an eyebrow. “You know, I read those SSR files. Greatest generation? You guys did some nasty stuff.”

Don’t I know it? Steve thought to himself as he took a deep breath. “Yeah, we compromised. Sometimes in ways that made us not sleep so well. But we did it so the people could be free.” He turned and pointed at the helicarriers before looking at Fury “This isn’t freedom, this is fear.”

“SHIELD takes the world as it is, not as we’d like it to be.” Fury stated simply. “It’s getting damn near past time for you to get with that program, Cap”

Steve shook his head. “Don’t hold your breath.” And with that he left.

He changed quickly, eager to put as much distance between him and SHIELD as possible for the rest of the day. After a short conversation with Rumlow about a mission report, he was on his bike and heading for Katie’s apartment, his mind whirling. What was Fury playing at? This wasn’t what he signed up for, at all. It felt so far removed from what he had joined the army to do, to keep people safe, free. Had he really changed that much? He felt a sudden pang for his Howling Commandoes, for Bucky, for Peggy, for Colonel Philips, for all those damned missions which had been simple- destroy HYDRA before they destroyed you.

Despite the fact he had woken up that morning and felt so happy with his girl being there, he couldn’t help but wish life was as simple as it had been back then.

*****

Katie’s morning had been far more productive. She had looked at a couple of transcript extracts her editor had selected. She had to admit, the guy had a good eye for a future blockbuster, and this one she particularly liked. After discussions, they settled on an initial run of two hundred hard copy of the books to be sold online, along with a downloadable kindle version, and if they went they would review how many more we needed.

Pleased with her mornings work and having cleared her diary for the afternoon, she had lunch in the kitchen and had just finished when she heard the elevator door open. She headed into the main area of her apartment to greet Steve, taking a deep breath as she noticed how drained he looked.

“Dare I ask how it went?”

His response was a sigh as he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her in for a hug, simply wanting to feel her close.

“That good huh?” She squeezed him back gently before she pulled away and headed towards the kitchen, him following behind her.

“Debrief was fine. Fury, however, went on about compartmentalisation, the usual crap.” Steve sighed, running his hand over his face, smiling softly to himself when he saw she was gathering stuff out of the fridge to make him a sandwich “And then shared something I really wish he hadn’t.”

“Like what?” she asked, throwing some turkey and mayo onto a sub. “Ever heard of Operation Insight?” Steve looked at her, even though he knew the answer. There’s no way she would have and not told him.

“No?” She handed him the plate containing his sandwich.

“Well apparently your brother has. Thanks.” He took the plate from her sat at the breakfast bar taking a bite of his food. He swallowed and then continued “Three huge hellicarriers that are basically designed to go up in the air and never come down based on Tony’s arc reactor tech. Programmed to monitor potential threats and wipe them out before they get chance to do anything.” She frowned, settling on the stool next to him. “And Fury has sanctioned this?”

Steve nodded, taking another bite of his food. “I don’t like it. Like I said to him, punishment normally comes after the crime.”

Katie could see he was really struggling with this and that his faith in SHIELD was running very, very thin. A lot of what the Agency did was political, not just about keeping people safe. She’d tried to explain that the lines were a lot more blurred than back in the 40s, but still had to admit she was kind of with him. As she pondered for a moment, Steve could see the cogs whirring in her brain, the slight v shape crease that always formed in the middle of her eyes when she was thinking was present. Steve didn’t blame her, it had thrown him too and he’d had the full explanation. The hangar had been huge, and there were enough people in there to make him realise that a LOT of people knew about it. What he didn’t know was who on his immediate team knew about it.

“I just wanna know who I can trust” He sighed, looking at Katie as she reached out gently, touching his cheek.

“I know, Soldier.” she said, softly before she shook her head. “Okay, no more talk about SHIELD or hellicarriers, or whatever.” She moved to pick up her soda. “What do you want to for the rest of the afternoon?”

Steve wanted to go to the Smithsonian. He’d been thinking about it since they had emailed him to invite him to open the exhibit on him, which he had politely declined. But he was curious to see what it was like, curious and also eager, after today, to be reminded of a time when he worked with people he knew inside out, people that he would trust with his life. And he was keen to share that with his girl, the woman who had months ago before they even started dating, been the one to help him pick what the museum would display.

“You know, we’ve still not been to the Smithsonian since they opened the exhibit.” He shruged, hoping his tone was casual enough to make it sound like he hadn’t been thinking about it enough. He failed though, smiling as Katie looked at him, arching an eyebrow.

Busted.

“Call it curiosity.” He shrugged.

“You know what curiosity did don’t you?” Katie quipped back, her eyes flashing playfully.

“What?”

She grinned as she delivered the punchline “Killed the Cap.”

*****

“A symbol to the nation. A hero to the world. The story of Captain America is one of honour, bravery and sacrifice,” the narrator at the Smithsonian museum said as we entered the exhibit.

Steve paused to pull the collar of his blue jacket up a little further, a gesture that, along with the cap that was pulled down over his face, he hoped would prevent him from being recognised as they made their way to the start of the pieces.

"Denied enlistment due to poor health, Steven Rogers was chosen for a program unique in the annals of American warfare. One that would transform him into the world’s first super soldier,” the Narrator continued. Steve paused to look at the display to his right when Katie gently nudged him.

“Think you’ve been rumbled.”

Steve looked down at her, and then followed her gaze as she looked to her left at a small boy dressed in a light blue T-shirt adorned with the design of his shield who was watching the pair of them, his eyes growing wide. Steve smiled, put a finger against his mouth to indicate for him to keep quiet. The boy nodded and then turned, running back off to find his mum.

Without speaking Steve took her hand and led her over to the part of the exhibit that had an older looking motorcycle on a platform and some black and white footage playing beside it. The footage was of him in his older Captain America uniform, also currently on display, running through a battlefield.

“In this rare footage, everyone’s favourite war hero, Captain America…”

He didn’t stop to hear the rest, he could remember that mission by heart. It had been on the outskirts of Toulouse, liberating another HYDRA prison camp. Katie allowed herself to be led by him, this was his moment after all. They slowly walked to a display of mannequins dressed in his original suit, plus those of the Howling Commandos, which had been donated by their families. His eyes lingered on Bucky’s for a second and he took a deep breath.

“Battle tested, Captain America and his Howling Commandos quickly earned their stripes. Their mission, taking down HYDRA, the Nazi rogue science division,”

Katie looked at the uniforms, a smile on her face. She had only seen photos of Steve’s war suit, never seen it in person and it intrigued her. More so because this was something that her dad had made, something physical he had touched. She felt a tug on her hand again, and she looked up to see that she was being led to a section dedicated to Bucky. The familiar (albeit again, only from photos), handsome face of his best friend looked back at them as they wandered over to read what it said in more detail.

“Best friends since childhood, Bucky Barnes and Steve Rogers were inseparable on both school yard and battlefield. Barnes is the only Howling Commando to give his life in service of his country…”

The narration didn’t cover half the text on the black, glass screen and in Katie’s opinion it wasn’t a particularly good tribute to a man who had lost his life in such tragic circumstances. She read the rest of the text as Steve’s eyes skated over it, reading, despite the fact he knew it all. He wished he could have saved him, he really did. He’d loved him to have been able to meet Katie. But then, he wouldn’t have anyway. As he would have most likely been dead now. Or what’s to say things may or may not have ended up differently. Would Buck have been on the Valkyrie with him?

He watched the black and white footage playing, where the two of them were talking and then laughing about something and he felt the sadness hit his chest again. And as if she sensed it too, Katie gripped his hand a little bit tighter and lay her head against his arm, her weight giving him something to anchor himself too, and he was grateful for it.

They carried on walking and then they found there was a small cinema area a bit further round the corner playing footage and interviews. Steve paused for a second and then looked at Katie, the question stayed silent. She nodded and together they walked in, taking a seat on one of the benches. There was a bit of introduction footage, and then a familiar face appeared on the screen.

Besides him Katie took a deep breath and whispered a single word “Dad…” and he automatically dropped a hand to her knee, where she placed hers on top of his as the two of them watched her father an animatedly talking to the camera.

“Rogers was different” Howard spoke, smiling, the caption on the screen telling him the footage had been filmed in 1953. “He was constantly striving to do the right thing, with no fear or care for how it would affect him. He, err, when we dropped him behind enemy lines we had no idea if we would see him again. I narrowly escaped myself, the machine guns nearly took our aircraft down but without thought to how he would get back, he told us to leave him behind. When they declared him missing in action the entire company was devastated but, lo and behold… well they can’t keep a good man down.” Howard paused and then looked down and back up at the camera “I can only hope that if I’m graced with Children, they grow up to be half as driven as he was to do the right thing…”

As Katie looked down at her feet, a stray tear fell down her cheek. Seeing her dad there like that was raw. She knew that Tony felt the loss of their parents far more than she did, she had only been seven after all when they had died and Tony had been her father, if you will, for far longer than her actual dad had. But still, seeing him in front of her so candidly, talking about his hopes for his future children, made something in her chest tighten and she couldn’t help but feel sadness at the fact she never got the chance to really know him. Steve gently squeezed her knee, but then as they looked back up at the screen it was his turn to still as someone he recognised extremely well, her face painted into his memory for life, entered the screen and began speaking, also in 1953.

"That was a difficult winter. A blizzard had trapped half our battalion behind the German line. Steve, Captain Rogers, he fought his way through a HYDRA blockade that had pinned our allies down for months.” Peggy Carter stumbled slightly through the interview. “He saved over a thousand men, including the man who would become my husband as it turned out. Even after he died, Steve was still changing my life,” And despite the fact that she smiles slightly at the end of this line, it’s clear to see that talking about Steve affected her a lot.

Katie leaned against him and with a breath he lay his head on top of hers. “We haven’t seen her for a while…” she whispered as the video finished. “Shall we go on the way home?” He gave a soft chuckle and dropped a kiss to the crown of her head.

“You read my mind.”

*******

Peggy was pleased to see them, as always when she was having a good day. They both greeted her and after a few pleasantries they told her about their trip to the Smithsonian. Peggy smiled, informing them that she remembered the interview, like it was yesterday, apparently the man interviewing her had been an “utter rogue”, but she didn’t elaborate on what that meant further than saying he was worse than Barnes, which made Steve laugh. They chatted a little about her time as Director at SHIELD before she trailed off with a sigh as she noticed that Steve was uncharacteristically quiet. After a little gentle coaxing from her and Katie he told her what was on his mind.

“My whole life I’ve just wanted to do what was right, I guess I’m not sure what that is anymore.” He paused for a moment, thinking of how to voice his worries about SHIELD “And I thought I could just throw myself back in and follow orders, it’s just not the same.”

Peggy chuckled as she rolled her eyes and looked at Katie. “He’s always so dramatic.”

Katie let out a small laugh, nodding her agreement. “Tell me about it!”

Steve shook his head, a smile on his face as he raised his eyebrows slightly and looked away as Peggy continued to speak.

“Look you saved the world, we rather mucked it up.”

“No you didn’t. You know, knowing that you helped found SHIELD is half the reason I stay.”

“And the other half being?” Her eyes strayed to Katie who smiled, looking down and then up at Steve as he caught her eye, his hand resting on her knee.

“I quit remember?” Katie reminded her.

Peggy smiled “Indeed, a woman with principles. That I can get on board with. ”Katie gave a little smile as Peggy continued. “Look, the world has changed and none of us can go back.” She spoke softly. “All we can do is our best, and sometimes the best that we can do is to start over.“

At that she started to cough. Steve quickly picked up a glass of water from the table and rounded the back of the chair Katie was sitting in to try and hand her the glass.

"Peg?” He held the glass out as her coughing subsided and she took a sip. Once she had finished she looked up and stared at Steve as if she was seeing a ghost

“Steve?” Peggy breathed out in an amazed yet broken voice.

“Yeah,” Steve whispered, his heart sinking as he recognised the look in her face. Her memory had gone, again.

“You’re alive! You, you came, you came back,” Peggy whimpered. Tears were gathering in her eyes at this point as she tried to hold them back and Steve was struggling to do the same with his own. One of the smartest, nicest, bravest women he had ever met was being betrayed by an illness that was literally rotting her brain. It was cruel, and every time she did this, they went through the same routine.

“Yeah, Peggy.” Steve responded forcing a smile onto his face as Katie squeezed his hand gently, standing up so he could take the chair next to Peggy.

“It’s been so long. So long,” Peggy started to cry, giving up on holding back her tears.

“I’ll leave you with her.” Katie spoke softly as she gently touched Steve’s shoulder. His hand briefly reached up to lay over hers before he leaned over to take Peggy’s.

“Well, I couldn’t leave you.” He forced himself to smile. “Not when you still owe me a dance.”

Normally that calmed the old lady down, but not today. She was becoming more and more confused and in the end he had to press the call button.

“Again?” The nurse who attended asked softly, and Steve simply nodded.

“I’ll fetch the doctor.”

Outside Katie took a deep breath and headed towards her car. Ex partners could always be an issue in relationships but this was something else, something completely different. She opened the passenger side to the car and sat side on in the seat, door open, legs dangling out. She felt sorry for Peggy, she really did, and her heart ached for Steve. It can’t be easy seeing the woman he once loved, and probably still did in some way, fading like that in front of your eyes.

She ran her hand over her face, rubbing at her eyes slightly and waited as she watched various people coming and going out of the main doors of the hospital. It wasn’t that long before a familiar figure appeared, a flash of white T-shirt standing out against his dark navy jacket and equally dark jeans as he walked towards her, hands in his pockets. She stood up, not saying a word as she wrapped her arms around him and he buried his face into the nook of her shoulder and neck, his safe place, his hands gently resting on her hips as he breathed out a sigh.

“Is she okay?” she asked gently. “Yeah they sedated her.” He said as he pulled away.

“I’m so sorry Steve.”

“What for?” “Peggy…it’s so unfair.” “Yeah…” He replied simply. And it was. He wished things could be different, that Peggy wasn’t ill. That she could be home, with her family, living out the last years of her life with the dignity she had lived the rest of it. She deserved more. He looked over the car roof across the street and watched for a second, everyone milling about their business, getting on with their lives. Like he was, and whilst he wished things had been different for Peggy, he suddenly found himself thinking and wondering if he would change anything if he could.

He felt Katie still in front of him, reacting to the fact he himself had changed posture, and as he looked down at her he was suddenly struck with the answer to his question. Despite everything, despite his sudden feelings of nostalgia sparked by the events of the last twenty hours or so, no he wouldn’t. Because whatever had happened, every action, every decision, it had led him to the girl now in his arms, and he loved her so fucking much it hurt. Yeah he had loved Peggy, he still did in some ways, but it was nothing compared to this. Nothing.

He reached out and took Katie’s hands, pulling up her arms so they were round his neck, pulling her closer to him as his own hands joined at the bottom of her back

“I love you.” He said gently, needing her to understand, to believe him. “My best girl.”

“I hope I’m your only girl, Rogers.” She sassed back with a sniff, and he smiled softly, happy that she understood.

“How about we head back to mine and not leave the flat for the entire day tomorrow?” Steve looked down at her, the idea suddenly coming to him and her face lit up. Katie loved lazy days. It was rare Steve was in the mood for them, his incessant energy normally meant he had to be doing something. But on the odd time he agreed, it usually involved them staying in bed till about midday, then watching old movies on the TV under a blanket on the couch, maybe a bit of fooling around and then calling a take out before retreating back to bed. Right now that sounded like a damned fine idea. “Can you clear your diary?”

“Consider it cleared.”

“I just wanna make one quick stop on the way home” He suggested, his journey of contemplation was leading him to one more place. He glanced at his watch before planting a kiss on her lips as she looked at him questioningly. “Thought we could pay our jogging friend a visit.”

********

“Look who it is. The running man and his pretty girl.” Sam joked slightly as he came over to the doorway where Katie and Steve were stood.

“Hey.” Katie smiled as he dropped a kiss onto her cheek.

“Caught the last few minutes. It’s pretty intense,” Steve commented as Sam shook his hand.

“Yeah, brother, we all got the same problems. Guilt, regret,” Sam shrugged. As his sentence went on his voice got more serious and softer.

“Have you lost someone?” Steve asked, perceptive as ever. Katie mentally cursed herself for not filling him in fully, but Sam didn’t seem too bothered to talk about it. He nodded gently.

“My wingman, Riley. Fly in the night mission. A standard PJ rescue op, nothing we hadn’t done a thousand times before, till an RPG knock Riley’s dumb ass out of the sky. Nothing I could do. It’s like I was up there just to watch,” Sam paused to cross his arms over his chest, his posture slightly tense. “After that, I had really hard time finding a reason for being over there, you know?”

“But you’re happy now, back in the world?” Steve asked

“Hey, the number of people giving me orders is down to about zero. So, hell, yeah,” Sam joked, loosening up slightly, before getting a bit serious, “You thinking about getting out?”

“No.” Steve replied quickly before he took a breath. “I don’t know. To be honest, I don’t know what I would do with myself if I did.”

“Ultimate fighting?” Sam shrugged and Steve laughed as Katie snorted. “It’s just a great idea off the top of my head. But seriously, you could do whatever you want to do. What makes you happy?”

Steve turned his head to look at Katie, an unconscious movement, smiling gently as he shrugged. “I dunno…”

“Oh I think you do.” Sam said, smirking slightly as Steve placed his hand on the small of his girl’s back.

“Oh, stop by the front desk on your way out,” Katie turned to Sam, smirking, and he raised an eyebrow in question,

“We asked for you by name.” Steve clarified.

“She seemed thoroughly impressed.” Katie finished. Both of Sam’s eyebrows rose at that and he looked down the hallway towards where the front desk was.

“You two are the best.” A smile stretching across his face as he began to turn to head down the hall. “Stop by anytime.”

“No problem.” Steve grinned in amusement as Sam jogged his way down the hall.

It was gone eight by the time they got home, having made a pit stop for a beer on the way. Steve held the door open for Katie, and she stepped into the apartment building and started to climb the stairs in front of him, giving him a quite pleasing view of her ass as her hips swayed side to side in front of him.

“Sam’s right you know.” She continued their discussion from the bar. “And so is Peggy.”

“What about?”

“If you wanted to get out you could do, start over.”

He took a deep breath. “I don’t know what I want, but spending the rest of my life playing janitor for Fury is not it.”

“I can write you a resignation note.” She grinned and Steve chuckled slightly and then took a deep breath.

“You know, it’s funny when I think about it. Us, stuff, what we’ve done and how far we’ve come in a year.”

“You’re saying it like it’s a bad thing.” She teased as she stepped onto his landing.

“No, that’s not what I mean at all.” He took a deep breath as she headed towards his door and turned to face him “You know, I’ve never really talked to anyone or shown them about my past in detail or introduced anyone to Peggy bar you.”

“Well I am your girlfriend.” She shrugged, holding onto the hand that wasn’t digging into his jeans pocket to fish out his keys. “Your best girl.” At that he smiled. “So you should be able to talk to me about anything.”

“I know, I’m not explaining myself very well.” He remarked, finally succeeding in obtaining his keys. And he wasn’t. He was trying to tell her that he couldn’t imagine his life without her, that he wanted her to share his everything, including his home.

“Spit it out Rogers.” She teased as he slid the key into the lock.

He took a deep breath. “Coming home last night and you being there…and then this morning…it was perfect, Doll, and I want that all the time.” He turned to face her leaving his key hanging from the door. “How would you feel about us maybe moving in together?”

She paused for a moment, looking at him, realising he was deadly serious. She raised her eyebrow.

“I thought you came from a time where man and woman didn’t live together until they were married?”

“We could get married if you want.” He blurted out. That made Katie raise both eyebrows as she studied him again, her mouth dropping into a small ‘o’. Steve looked back at her, trying to keep his face passive, as if it had been a joke, even though he knew it wasn’t. He’d known for months she was the one.

But to blurt it out like that? Outside his apartment door, in such a dumbass way?

Way to go, Rogers.

Katie cocked her head to one side, there was a funny look on Steve’s face that she couldn’t place. But whatever it was, even if Steve was serious about them getting married, she knew him well enough to understand that was not how he would want to propose, and that he was probably kicking himself about stumbling it out the way he had done. So she broke the nervous tension, as she always did, with a slight joke.

“You know, that’s not much of a proposal.” She slid her arms up around his neck. “But its one step up from you’d make a great housewife, I suppose.”

“Should I try again?” A cheeky grin spread across his face, glad the tone was playful, his arms circling her waist “Yeah, with a big, fuck off Tiffany diamond.”

“I didn’t think you were so materialistic?”

“Well, you know what they say? Diamonds are a girls’ best friend.”

“And there I was, thinking it was me.” He muttered, his lips pressing onto hers.

“That’s so sweet!” A voice interrupted and they both turned to look at Kate, his neighbour from over the hall. For a split second Steve thought she was talking to them but it soon became apparent she was on the phone. “That’s so nice…but hey, I gotta go…okay bye…”

She dropped the phone into the basket of laundry she was carrying before grinning at us both “My aunt, she’s kind of an insomniac”

Steve smile before looking at the basket of washing in her arms as he dropped his arm round Katie’s shoulder “you know if you want…if you want, you can use my machine. Might be easier and cheaper than the one in the basement.” “Thank you, but I already have a load in downstairs actually, and you really don’t want my scrubs in your machine.” She grinned. “I just finished a rotation on the infectious diseases ward, so,”

“Ah, well, we’ll keep our distance,” Steve grinned, holding his hands up, palms out.

“Hopefully not too far.” She chuckled. “Don’t want to lose my best neighbour. Okay, well I better be off.” She turned to go before she stopped and spun back round to look at Steve. “Oh, by the way, I think you left your stereo on.”

“Right, thank you.” Steve watched her go, frowning. He looked at Katie as they both pressed their ears to the door. The record player was certainly on but…

“We definitely didn’t leave that on before.” Katie looked at him, as the gentle tones of Kitty Kallen Long Long Time hit their ears.

Steve held his finger up to his lips and gestured to the window, before leaving Katie where he was. He ran off, down the stairs as fast as he could and then he scaled the gate on the fire escape easily. Once he reached the steps which were parallel to his window he took a running jump, easily pulling himself up over the sill and into the kitchen area. Quickly and quietly he moved along the wall, picking up his shield which was leaning against the shelving unit. Holding it up, he cautiously peered round the corner of the room into the living area and instantly relaxed when he saw Fury lounging in a chair.

“I don’t remember giving you a key.” He said, somewhat sardonically.

“What, you really think I’d need one?” Nick replied. Steve shook his head and headed to the front door of the flat, pulling it open.

“Fury.” He said with a roll of his eyes, turning and walking back into the apartment.

“Huh?” Katie asked as she followed him into the living room, where the music was coming from, to see Fury sitting on the couch in the dark.

“What are you doing here?” She demanded.

"Nice to see you too, Nova. And in answer to your question my wife kicked me out.”

“I didn’t know you were married,” She continued, frowning. And she didn’t. And she wasn’t sure that he was.

“There are a lot of things you don’t about me,” Fury replied casually.

“I know, Nick. That’s the problem,” Steve grumbled walking forward as Katie remained where she was, eyes narrowed at her old boss. Steve flipped on the light switch, instantly recoiling in surprise when he noticed Fury’s injuries. Besides him Katie gasped slightly and moved to get closer to help but Fury indicated for her to stop and the both of them to stay quiet. He turned off the light again and typed something on his phone.

'EARS EVERYWHERE’.

Bugs? His apartment was bugged? By who? They both exchanged a glance and instantly Katie looked up and around the room, as if she expected to see a microphone glaring at them.

“I’m sorry to have to do this but I had nowhere else to crash,” Fury looked around a bit before he typed something else up on his phone:

'SHIELD COMPROMISED’.

Steve and Katie shared another glance, the pair of them wide eyed. This was bad.

“Who else knows about your wife?” Steve asked, keeping his voice even.

Fury showed them another text;

'YOU TWO AND ME’.

“Just my friends,” Fury grunted in pain while getting up and walking closer to them.

“Is that what we are?” Katie blinked at him. She still hadn’t completely forgiven the man for lying to them all about Coulson.

“That’s up to you.” Fury replied, his eyes darting from Katie to Steve.

Then out of nowhere came a rapid succession of gunshots. Steve quickly pushed Katie out of the way, the pair of them taking cover behind the kitchen wall as Fury groaned before he collapsed down to the floor. Steve scooted forward, keeping as low as he could, pulling him into the kitchen. Katie knelt next to him and tried to check his injuries through his black clothing when he reached up and handed something to Steve.

“Don’t, trust anyone,” he coughed before passing out. Katie and Steve both looked at what he had been handed and saw that it was a flash drive. Steve curled his hand around it and looked at Katie, but before either of them could say anything else there was the sound of someone breaking into the apartment. Steve quickly moved into a defensive position, in front of Katie and Fury, raising his shield.

“Captain Rogers?” a familiar voice suddenly called out and they watched as Kate, his neighbour, cautiously walked in with a gun pointed. “I’m Agent Thirteen of SHIELD’s Special Service.”

“Kate?” Steve frowned, shaking his head. He’d just about had his fill of surprises.

“I’m assigned to protect you.” She continued

“On whose orders?” Katie snapped.

Kate stopped as she spotted Fury lying on the floor. “His,” she dropped besides Katie, checking Fury for a pulse and then spoke into her radio

“Foxtrot is down, he’s unresponsive. I need EMTs.”

“Do you have a twenty on the shooter?” A SHIELD agent questioned through the radio.

Then there was a movement on the other side of the window, on the roof adjacent to the building. Steve instantly glanced up and saw a flash of silver and the shadow of a figure running across the rooftop.

“Tell them I’m in pursuit.” He said and with that he took a running jump and smashed straight through his window, and through into the office building opposite. Steve ran, keeping his eye on the man, smashing through walls, windows, anything in his way. Eventually he caught up with him on the roof and flung his shield at the assassin who, to Steve’s shock, caught it with one swift move in the hand of his metal arm. There was a pause as Steve could do nothing but eye the man with surprise before the shield came flying back. Steve caught it, with both hands on its rim but the force pushed him back a few yards along the gravel surface of the roof. By the time he had stopped the momentum moving him, the assassin had jumped. Steve ran to the edge of the building and looked down.

He was gone.

*****

“What happened?” Hill asked as they all looked through the glass window at the hustle and bustle of the operating room. Steve moved his arm from around Katie and took her hand in his, squeezing her fingers gently.

"He was at my apartment when we got home.” Steve started. “I hadn’t even had chance to ask why when there were two blasts, then another. Someone shot him through the window- three times. I tried to go after the shooter, but I lost him on the roof of the building across the street.”

Steve had no doubt in his mind that if there was anyone else in SHIELD they could trust right now it was Hill, but both he and Katie kept quiet. He had taken Fury’s warning of trusting nobody seriously and had told Katie as much as they had strode through the ED of the hospital. Both were aware that Hill was studying them, side on, her face stony.

“What aren’t you telling me?” She asked quietly.

“Nothing.” Katie answered for them.

Before Hill could drill either of them anymore, the door to the observation room flung open and heavy footsteps crossed the room, stopping at the other side of Katie.

“Is he gonna make it?” Natasha asked, almost inaudibly, staring through the window.

“We don’t know,” Hill mumbled.

“Tell me about the shooter,” Natasha whispered

“He’s fast and strong. And he had a metal arm,” Steve said, letting go of Katie’s hand to fold his arms across his chest and as he did, they both caught the look of recognition and slight fear on Natasha’s face reflected in the window.

“Ballistics?” She swallowed heavily.

“Three slugs. No rifling and completely untraceable,” Maria answered softly.

“Soviet made?”

“Yeah,” Maria looked at Natasha in shock. Steve turned to face her, as did Katie, but she didn’t look back. She stared straight through to the operating theatre but before Katie could ask what it was that she wasn’t saying, the operation room went into overdrive. Machines started beeping erratically, the doctors and nurses were rushing around the room and the panic was palpable even behind the glass. But they couldn’t save him.

“Time of death, 1:03 A.M.”

A few moments passed as the four of them stood completely in shock. Katie reached up to wipe a tear that had trickled down her cheek away, before Natasha turned and almost sprinted out of the room.

Steve pulled his hand out of his pocket, turning the flash drive that Nick had given him over in his hand. Nick had been killed because he knew whatever it was that was on that drive. What could possibly be so bad, so secret, so dangerous that the Director of SHIELD was deemed a threat for knowing? He glanced up at Katie who was watching him, tears in her eyes. She might have had her issues with Fury, but he was a good man and would never have wished him dead. With a sigh Steve placed the item back into his pocket and pulled her in for a hug.

******

A little later, they were all in the same room as Nick’s body. Natasha was by him, hardly having moved a muscle, almost like she was in shock. And it unnerved Katie. Nat wasn’t one to really show emotion but then again, Fury had meant a lot to her. The door opened and a doctor entered, speaking to Hill. She nodded and then walked over to Katie and Steve, coughing to clear her throat.

“They need to take him.” She said, her voice cracking slightly. Steve nodded and stepped forwards.

“Nat. Natasha…” But at that she turned away from them all and made her way quickly into the corridor of the Hospital. Katie and Steve looked at one another, before they hastily followed her.

“Why was Fury in your apartment?” Natasha span around to ask Steve. Her eyes were filled with sadness, but Katie could also see suspicion etched on her pretty features.

“I don’t know,” Steve sighed shrugging his shoulders, and before the conversation could go on further they were interrupted by Rumlow.

“Cap, they want you back at Shield,” He informed them, gently touching Katie’s shoulder. “You too Nova.”

“Alright, give us a second,” Steve nodded dismissing Rumlow, perhaps a little more harshly than he intended, as he turned back to Natasha but Rumlow was insistent

“They want you now,”

“Alright” Katie spoke firmly but calmly. Rumlow nodded and then moved back down the hallway.

“You’re a terrible liar.” Natasha shook her head at Steve with her trademark smirk that didn’t reach her eyes before she turned and left.

“What the hell is on that drive?” Katie asked Steve after a moment of silence.

“I don’t know, but it’s what Natasha was saving data to on our mission the other day.” He replied before he looked up staring very focused into a vending machine to his right, which was open as a janitor filled it up. He didn’t want to take the drive back to the Triskellion, just in case. He knew that something wasn’t quite right.

Katie caught his eye before glancing around the hallway that was mostly full of SHIELD agents, luckily they were all congregated on the other end.

“Do it.” She nodded, figuring out his intention to hide the item “I’ll distract them.”

Without another look back at him, she began to stride forwards towards Rumlow.

“Its almost four am.” she glanced at her watch. “What do they want us for Brock? We already told Sitwell what we know and I don’t work for SHIELD anymore, remember?”

Rumlow shrugged “Honestly, I don’t know Nova. I’m just under instructions to get you both back to base.”

At that point Steve reached them, but he wasn’t stopping. Taking Katie’s hand he nodded to the STRIKE leader

“Let’s go.”

“Yeah,” Rumlow fell into step with them, fixing his earpiece. “Strike! Move it out.”

Steve drove to the Triskellion, Katie’s car flanked by the Armoured SUVs as they sped through the streets of DC. Katie dozed off for ten minutes and Steve let her sleep, lost in his own thoughts. He had expected her to be called in alongside him, especially after she had been, along with him, the last people Fury had spoken to him before he died. But he wasn’t happy about it, he wanted her as far away from whatever the hell was going on as possible. Once they arrived he gently shook her awake and the two of them were given an hour or so to grab something to eat. Neither were hungry, but they forced down their sandwiches, Katie’s brain working in overdrive as she did so. Something was nagging at her, and she was trying to make the connections, figure it out, but her head simply kept replaying Fury getting shot over and over.

“Foxtrot is down, he’s unresponsive. I need EMTs.”

“Do you have a twenty on the shooter?”

She frowned.

“What is?” Steve asked, coffee in his hand as he sat back on one of the large chairs in one of the common rooms by the kitchen area.

“Before…when Kate…Agent thirteen, whatever the hell her name is called back to base…she said Fury was down and needed EMTs…”

She paused and Steve waited, knowing how her analytical brain worked. She had to follow threads, talk them over or write them out, letting them weave together as she did. A look of comprehension crossed her face as the threads connected.

“Sitwell…” She whispered.

“What about him?” Steve asked. “He was the one that replied, at least it sounded like him.” She bit her lip, but not in the seductive way that made his crotch twitch, the way she did when she was thinking “And he asked…do you have a twenty on the shooter.”

Steve frowned, not quite sure where this was going. “Okay…” “Well, how did he know Fury had been shot? How could anyone know he had been shot?”

Now he understood. He understood completely. Damned it she was clever. “They couldn’t.” He sat up and leaned towards her, his voice dropping. “Not unless they were there or Kate…whoever, told them.”

“And she didn’t. She just said he was down and unresponsive.” “Which means…” Steve began, but Katie finished for him. “Sitwell knew about the hit. Because he was in on it.”

The both looked at one another, their faces wearing similar looks of shock. Fury was right, SHIELD was compromised. But how far, they had no idea.

Before Steve had chance to say anything else, the door opened and Rumlow stepped in

“Secretary Pierce is ready now guys.” “Thanks.” Katie nodded, shooting Steve another glance as they both stood up.

“Not a word.” He mumbled as they got into the elevator “We say nothing, not until we figure out who we can trust.”

“If we can trust anyone.” She mumbled back.

*****

“Captain, why was Nick in your apartment last night?” Secretary Pierce looked at Steve as he sat on the couch next to Katie in the large office.

“I don’t know.” He answered in a soft voice.

“Did you know it was bugged?” Pierce pressed on.

“We did.” Katie nodded meeting the secretary’s eye. “Because Nick told us.”

“Did he tell you he was the one who bugged it?”

Steve took a breath and glanced at Katie, his expression stony but the two of them shared the understanding.

No, no he had not.

“I want you to see something.” Pierce continued, and gestured to a monitor just behind the couches we were sitting on. On the screen was a man tied down to a chair, he looked to be currently being interrogated. Katie didn’t recognise the man, but Steve did. It was Batroc, the lead merc from the hijacking of the Lemurian Star.

“Is that live?” Steve asked.

“Yeah, they picked him up last night in a not so safe house in Algiers.”

“Are you saying he’s a suspect?” Steve didn’t take his eyes off the screen “Assassination isn’t Batroc’s line.”

“It’s more complicated than that. Batroc was hired anonymously to hijack the Lemurian Star. He was contacted by email and paid by wire transfer, and then the money was run through seventeen fictitious accounts. The last going to a holding company that was registered to a Jacob Veech.” Pierce said handing Steve a folder.

“Am I supposed to know who that is?” Steve skimmed through the file offered to him in curiosity and confusion.

“Not likely. Veech died six years ago. His last address was 1435 Elmhurst Drive. When I first met Nick, his mother lived at 1437.”

“Wait,” Katie frowned as she gathered what Pierce was suggesting. “Are you saying Fury hired the pirates? Why?”

“The prevailing theory?” Pierce shrugged. “The hijacking was a cover for the acquisition and sale of classified intelligence. The sale went sour and that led to Nick’s death.”

“If you really knew Nick Fury you’d know that’s not true.” Steve replied strongly, and he believed it. Fury was a lot of things, but a traitor he was not.

Pierce nodded in agreement. “Why do you think we’re here talking?” He then got to his feet and began to walk towards the window. “See, I took a seat on the council not because I wanted to, but because Nick asked me to because we were both realists. We knew that despite all the diplomacy, and the hand shaking and the rhetoric, to build a really better world sometimes means having to tear the old one down. And that makes enemies.”

Steve didn’t like the way this was going. He looked at Katie and gestured for her to stand as he did. Pierce turned back around and looked at them both.

“Those people that call you dirty because you’ve got the guts to stick your hands in the mud and try to build something better. And the idea that those people could be happy today,” Pierce shoved his hands in his pockets. “Makes me really, really angry. Captain, you and Miss Stark were the last ones to see Nick Fury alive. I don’t think that’s an accident.” Pierce said matter-of-factly. “And I don’t think you do, either. So, I’m going to ask again was he there?”

“He told us not to trust anyone.” Steve said honestly.

Pierce made a humming sound. “I wonder, if that included him.”

There was a tense moment of silence before Steve spoke again. “I’m sorry. Those were his last words. Excuse us,” He turned to leave, picking up his shield that he sent down upon our arrival and attaching it to the harness on his back, before ushering Katie out of the room slightly ahead of him.

“Captain,” Pierce’s voice halted him mid step and he turned to look at him. “Someone murdered my friend. I’m going to find out why. Anyone who gets in my way is going to regret it.” Pierce’s voice rang out again, a pointed look in their direction.

Steve wasn’t a stupid man, and he knew that was a veiled threat. He took a deep breath, considering his response, before he decided appearing un-rattled was the best option.

“Understood.” He nodded, holding the door open for Katie to step through keeping himself between her and Pierce as he followed, anchoring his hand on her back to keep her moving.

“You should have lied.” She whispered.

“Huh?” “Back then, said we didn’t know why Fury was there. By telling him that he told us not to trust anyone he knows we know and that we’re hiding something.” Her tone was a little panicked and Steve simply took a deep breath.

“We need to get to the hospital and get that stick.” He looked at her, remaining adamant that whatever it was that was on there would hold the answers. He looked up and down the corridor before they stepped into the elevator.

“Operations Control” Steve spoke as the elevator scanned his face and Katie’s Guest ID.

“Confirmed”

Just as the doors were about to close, Rumlow stepped in with two other STRIKE agents.

“Keep all STRIKE personnel on site” He was saying. Both the agents nodded and voiced their acknowledgement of his order. “Forensics.”

“Confirmed.”

“Cap, Nova…” Rumlow nodded to them both.

“Rumlow.” Steve acknowledged him as the doors closed and they started to descend.

“Evidence Response found some fibres on the roof they want us to see.” Rumlow turned his head to look at Steve. “You want me to get the tac-team ready?”

“No, let’s wait and see what it is first.”

“Right.” Rumlow turned back and Steve looked out of the side of the elevator, pondering what his next move was. Chase down the man responsible? The drive? The elevator stopped at the next floor and Rollins plus a few more SHIELD and Strike agents entered, Steve moving over slightly to allow them in.

“What’s the status so far?” Rollins was saying.

“Administrations level” another one asked, before they continued whatever it was they were talking about, moving round to find a space behind Steve and Katie.

He noticed Katie look round, a frown on her face, but before he could say anything Rumlow spoke, looking over his shoulder at Steve.

“I’m sorry about what happened with Fury. Messed up, what happened to him”

“Thank you.” Steve nodded.

Katie could sense something was off. Years of training as an Agent didn’t just leave you when you quit, and those years of training had taught her very well to read body language. Rumlow was alert, too alert, and it was more than just a nervousness because Fury had been killed. There was an atmosphere in the lift, and she glanced at one of the agents that had joined them at the last floor. He was still talking, normally, but he there was a bead of sweat dripping down his cheek from his temple.

Steve could sense it too. He watched as Rumlow and Rollins exchanged a glance and looked down at Katie who was watching him, nervous expression on her face. He shook his head gently, instructing her to keep calm.

The elevator stopped and another agent entered.

“Records”

This one stood in front of them, facing the elevator doors and it was then with a slight air of exasperation at allowing it to happen, Steve realised they were surrounded. Whilst he wasn’t too concerned, he knew he could more than likely fight his way out, it was his girl he was bothered for. It had been months since she had been in active combat, and this was going to be brutal. Besides him Katie stiffened, feeling very underprepared for what was about to go down. She had no weapons, nothing. Instinctively Steve gripped her hand and pulled her forward so she was stood next to him instead of behind and moved his feet apart slightly, hands on the buckle of his belt, adopting his Captain stance, preparing for what was coming.

“Before we get started,” he sighed, looking down before he stared straight ahead, “does anyone want to get out?”

His eyes flicked to the back of Rumlow’s head. There was a moment’s pause before all hell broke loose. They both put up a good fight, ducking, diving, punching. Steve was then shocked with a baton, but he simply grit his teeth, absorbing the electricity into his body. It hurt, but it wasn’t unbearable. And then, three of them managed to snap one of his arms to the wall of the elevator using some kind of metallic clamp, before five of them piled on him at once, attempting to pin his other arm in too. He kicked out, taking down as many as he could.

Just as Katie had floored the second of the agents who had launched at her, she was grabbed from behind by her hair and hauled to the edge of the elevator, being wrestled roughly to the floor by Rumlow who was instantly on top of her, trying to get her wrists from where she had positioned them underneath her body in an attempt to stop them restraining her.

"Brock…” She spoke gently, looking at him as she swallowed. “What’s going on?” “I’m sorry Stark.” He shook his head. “Just following orders.”

“Yeah well follow this.” She snarled, the anger brewing in her as she jerked her head forwards as hard as she could, feeling it connect with his nose. He yelled, and then her head snapped painfully to the right as he back handed her straight across the face. She felt her lip split and the warm, metallic taste of blood hit her taste buds, stars flashing in front of her eyes as her ears began to ring from the harsh knock.

Steve saw Rumlow land the blow to Katie’s face and let out a growl of anger and aimed another kick at the final agent standing, causing them man to collide with the side of the elevator before slumping down. He turned, pulled on his arm as hard as he could, wrenching the cuff off the side of the elevator and looked up in time to see Katie, who was now pinned against the wall by another set of those damned cuffs, take a blow to the ribs from Rumlow causing her to cry out in pain.

“Rumlow!” Steve yelled causing the man to whip his head round, surprise on his face. Katie, using her arms as leverage, swung her legs upwards, kicking Rumlow with both feet. The STRIKE leader stumbled slightly as Steve snarled at him, his entire body and face alight with rage “Touch my girl again and I’ll fucking kill you.”

Rumlow got to his feet, holding one of his arms out, electric rod in his hand “Whoa, big guy. I just want you both to know, this ain’t personal.”

He then lunged at Steve with his electric rod but one on one Steve was easily able to defend himself, he moved to the right, dodged and grabbed Rumlow, throwing him harshly upwards where he crashed into the ceiling of the elevator, before falling to the floor, unconscious.

“Yeah well, it kind of feels personal” Steve said, his breath slightly ragged from the exertion. He used his foot to flip his shield over like a Frisbee, catching it perfectly.

“You alright?” Steve asked, stepping over the bodies that littered the floor of the elevator to get to Katie.

“Yeah.” She assured him. Steve cut the cuffs that were restraining her into two pieces with his shield and she bent over, his hands gently on her back as she rubbed at her side before straightening up and stalking over to where Rumlow was beginning to stir slightly. She kicked him hard in the face, causing him to flip backwards and he was out, unconscious.

“Nothing personal.” She spat, then looked up at Steve. There was a moment during which they both looked around, trying to make sense of what had happened, before the elevator doors opened and Steve pulled Katie sharply behind him. They both stared at a team of STRIKE agents pointing their weapons into the elevator. Steve raised his shield.

“Drop the shield! Put your hands in the air!”

Steve looked round, and spotted the elevator wires to the left of Katie’s head

“DUCK!” he yelled at her, and as she did, he swiped with his shield over her head sending them plummeting. Eventually the emergency brake systems kicked in and the elevator stopped, slightly misaligned with the doors by a few feet. As Katie bent down to retrieve a gun and some ammo off one of the Agents, Steve forced the door open, intending to climb out but more STRIKE agents were approaching. He closed the door again and looked at Katie, then around the glass walls, looking down below us at the glass roof of the main Triskelion atrium.

It was a long way but they could make it.

“You’re fucking kidding, right?” Katie exclaimed, realising exactly what he was thinking.

“Give it up, Rogers! Get that door open! You have nowhere to go!” came the yell from the floor outside the elevator door.

“Do you trust me?” Steve asked, both his hands cupping Katie’s face.

“Of course I do, but…”

“Then hang on…”

She sighed and jumped onto his back, swinging her legs round his waist and her arms round his neck. Steve raised his shield in front of him, before he propelled them forward and broke through the glass in the elevator, spreading his arms out wide as he fell to prevent them from tumbling through the air before tucking his body as tightly in to his shield as he could. Katie did the same, burying her head into his back as they crashed through the glass ceiling and hit the floor with a loud clang, to screams and shouts from people all around the atrium.

Katie gave a soft groan, rolling off Steve who moaned and stretched out, having been winded from the impact. But Steve knew they had to keep moving. With a monumental effort, he pushed himself up onto his knees, took a deep breath and offered his hand to Katie to help her stand. They both took a quick glance around before he started to run, pulling her with him. She stumbled slightly, but Steve kept hold of her, not letting her fall until her legs seemed to be working again.

And then they ran.

**** Chapter 15

**Original Posting**

#stark spangled banner #steve rogers #Katie Stark #steve rogers x ofc #steve rogers x original female character #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers fic #mcu #mcu fanfic #captain america #chris evans #chris evans characters

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twdmusicboxmystery · 4 years

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Bits & Pieces, Themes & Evidence

Morning Everyone! So, below are just a bunch of bits and pieces that me, my fellow theorists and/or others in the fandom have come up. They don’t really fit into one, cohesive theory, but they’re most about or have come out of 10x18. I keep joking that this is the episode that just keeps on giving. We’re STILL talking about it and figuring things out about it.

Leah as a Hallucination/Daryl’s PTSD:

It’s been suggested that in 10x18, Dog never actually left Daryl. The episode is cut in a way to suggest that Daryl went long periods without seeing Dog (which is symbolic, of course) but maybe that’s not true and Dog was always there. Not only is that super interesting, but it works with one of my first observations. When I first watched the episode, I thought that the second time he sees Dog, first time as a grown dog and not a pup, and meets Leah, he didn't seem surprised to see Dog. So, I thought maybe he'd seen Dog a lot by then. I changed my mind for the sake of the symbolism. If it represents Grady, it makes more sense that Daryl simply recognized him as the pup me once met, but really had been separated from his for awhile. But I’m just saying this hallucination theory and the idea of Dog being there all along, just backs up my first impressions. That's all.

Also, weapon13whitefang left a long comment on my Tumblr post about Leah being a hallucination. It's really not so much about the show as about PTSD because they have some experience with it. I found it really interesting and enlightening, so it might interest some of you. You can read it HERE under the comments.

Why He Got Defensive at the Idea of Leah Leaving Him

A couple of my friends were talking about this, and this is just my contribution to the conversation. I think it's directly because Leah is predicated on his time with Beth. Even if he's not consciously aware of the delusion, some part of his UNconscious brain knows that Leah = Beth. And he knows Beth wouldn't have willingly left him. Not only because she said that, but because when she DID disappear, it wasn't her fault or her choice either time. So, when Carol says, "maybe she just left," Daryl's brain rails against that and he gets really defensive. And the interesting thing is that it's really not about him taking it personally or about his ego. It's about what he knows to be true of Beth. It's actually his brain being really logical in the midst of the delusion.

The Talk Dead to Me Podcast with Lynn Collins

I listened to the Talk Dead to me Podcast and this week’s guest was—no surprise—Lynn Collins. No huge TD smoking guns or anything, but it was interesting nonetheless. First of all, one of the really big C@ryl accounts was pretty much called out for being a toxic troll.

For anyone who doesn’t know, Lynn Collins gave a different interview a few days back (not this podcast; just a different one) in which she mentioned that Daryl and Carol’s relationship is very mother/son. Just after that, I won’t say the name but one of the most well known C@ryl accounts who can be REALLY nasty to…well…I was gonna say other shippers but pretty much anyone in the fandom who dares disagree with her, called Lynn an ageist for saying that Carol was mothering Daryl.

So, when the podcast began, Johnny O’Dell, who is the host, said that most TWD fans are super cool but a lot of the shippers can be toxic. He doesn't mention any particular ships in accordance to that (I actually think he briefly mentions all of them, saying people ship Daryl with Carol, Beth, Connie, and Rosita the most) but then after saying SOME of the shippers can be toxic, he talked about the post she made calling Lynn Collins ageist and said that was ridiculous and toxic and that we need to be cool to the actors. So, it's very obvious it was her comment he was talking about.

And of course, the ageist thing she accused Lynn Collins of is ridiculous. Not only is it true that Carol and Daryl’s relationship can be very mother/son at times, but saying so is not an insult to Carol. It’s a comment on the nature of the relationship, not on anyone’s actual age. Of course Carol isn’t old enough to be Daryl’s mom. But that doesn’t mean she doesn’t mother him.

Then when Lynn Collins came onto the podcast, she addressed the ageist comment. She basically said everything I said above in more detail. She talked about how she was taken aback by being called that because, being a woman over 40 in Hollywood, she actually deals with a lot of ageism. And about how she's a mother, but became one a little later in life (in her thirties, rather than her twenties) and she was shocked that being called a mother can actually be derogatory to some people. It REALLY shouldn’t be. It’s really sad that people would take that as an insult. And then she went on to say that any character can be maternal, even if they're not the biological mother of the person they're mothering. She even said Daryl is somewhat paternal to Carol, teaching her how to gut a fish and everything.

Now, maybe this is neither here nor there when it comes to TD stuff. But one thing I thought was really interesting was that Lynn Collins said when she first started watching the show in S2 or S3, she was actually a Caryler. She wanted them together originally. She also said that eventually she realized that's not where they were going with it and kind of moved on.

But the thing is, it just proves to me even more that she's being told to talk about it in a particular way. If everything she's said is true: that she was a raging fan and has been in the tags and talking about it a ton (and she says that on the podcast again; that she would get really excited about it and watch with friends and they would tell her to chill, lol) then why on earth would you talk about Daryl and Carol as a mother/son relationship...unless you were instructed to.

She knows how passionate and sometimes toxic the Caryl ship is because she used to be one of them. So that just drove home for me that this isn't something she would just come up with on her own. And I did like what she said and how she said it. I honestly think she's trying to help the Carylers feel better about things, but also let them down gently. And of course there are some hardcore Carylers, like that account that said the ageist thing, that are just never going to give it up. Not much anyone can do about that.

The only other thing that struck me about the podcast, and also brought to mind stuff said on TTD, is that I'm more and more sure that everyone knows what's up with Leah's character. If she's an illusion (and I'll assume she is until we know different) I think everyone knows that. I think Lynn knows it, Norman, Melissa, all of them.

For one thing, she said in this podcast that she didn't know if or when she'd be back. That was kind of a slip of the tongue, I think, because we already know she's signed on for S11, and she's announced it. And they're filming. So that's just untrue. And I thought that about Melissa on TTD, too. She said she didn't know what the Leah story line would be, they only told her a little bit back in Bonds when she had to say "her dog." But Melissa is a long time, mainstream cast member. I just don't believe that she doesn't know where the story is going. Again, just something they're instructed to say. But something else occurred to me, too.

When Melissa talked about the "her dog" line on TTD, she said, "there was a line that became a thing." From that, I have to assume she meant that people started to obsess about it online and wonder what the "her" was about. I honestly don't know if anyone other than TD picked out that line, but they might have. Either way, between this, and their reaction to the Caryler's "ageist" comment, it proves that they read the online theories. And of course we all already know that, but there's proof. That ageist comment was posted like 24 hours ago. And already they're addressing it and obviously don't like it and don't want people thinking the show or its actors are associated with that sort of thing.

Which is exactly why I think they HAVE to know about our Leah-is-a-hallucination theory. Even others outside our fandom suspect it. But the writers aren't addressing that. And don't get me wrong: I don't think they will. The Bonds line was literally MONTHS ago, and they waited until the Leah episode to address it. Because otherwise, they'd have to give spoilers and they weren't going to do that. But my point is, if the hallucination theory was not a thing (kind of like Rick being on TWB was not a thing and Lynn Collins being an ageist is not a thing and Beth not being BBQed at Terminus was not a thing) they would be addressing and discrediting it. They aren't. I’m definitely side-eyeing that.

Daryl’s Search for Rick/Beth’s Search for Liquor

This is something my fellow theorists and I were discussing back and forth for a few days. I’m not going to give you the entire conversation, but someone said something about Beth searching for liquor in Still and couldn’t that be a foreshadow? See—you’ll probably hear more about this in coming weeks—but we’ve been rewatching old episodes like Still, Alone, and others, with an eye toward what we’ve learned from S10 and especially the bonus episodes. And we’re realizing there’s a lot more foreshadowing in them than we ever realized before. Most of what’s in them we’ve looked at in terms of the Bethyl romance and of course Beth’s return, but I for one have never thought to go beyond that. Yeah, I REALLY should have.

So here’s the thing. We always talk about Daryl searching for people, but Beth was searching for liquor in that episode. I've never really thought to connect those two things. It either represents the same template of Daryl's search for her, or it might represent her searching for him. But then, those two templates may be one and the same. I need to think on it more and make more connections.

One thing it did make me think of, though, is that there's a theme about not accepting the first and only thing that comes your way, because there's something bigger, better, happier, more fulfilling down the road. So, Daryl didn't want Beth to drink the peach schnapps because that's a weak drink. He wanted her to have a REAL drink. And of course we've talked about this theme in terms of the peach schnapps before.

But we kind of see it everywhere, including in relationships. The small, short term relationships all follow this pattern. Maybe it’s not a terrible relationship, but it’s not true love, either. So they need to move on from it and find the more perfect relationship for them. The locations or homes do, too. So, in 4b, we saw each of the groups stop somewhere and try to stay. And it wasn't so much that they chose not to. More often than not, circumstances forced them to leave. But still. The theme is that it was better that they moved on so a bigger reunion could take place.

And on that note, Leah really still does fit the short-term relationship pattern. If the point was to always show short term relationships that weren't ideal and something better coming down the road, that's why they wanted to do something like this for Daryl. Beth is obviously going to be the much better, more fitting, more fulfilling relationship, where he belongs, etc. But I think they knew they couldn't do that without doing a disservice to Daryl's character. The only way to satisfy both criteria was to make her a hallucination. So the pattern is still there, but for him, it's not a real or literal relationship.

Find Me Theme

So, @wdway is the one who reminded me of this. Back in 9x05, Rick gets hurt and starts hallucinating right before blowing up the bridge and being taken to the CRM by Jadis, right? All on the same page? Well, in that episode, there’s a huge theme about Rick finding his family. In every hallucination, he tells the people he sees—Shane, Hershel, etc—that he’s looking for his family and needs to find them. Near the end, he hallucinates Michonne and the others being with him on the bridge, and Michonne tells him that they’re his family and he did find them. Then, just before he shoots the dynamite, he says, “I found them.”

And now we have this episode called “Find Me” where Daryl is obsessively searching for Rick, and there’s a ridiculous amount of Beth symbolism thrown in. Are we seeing the over-arching theme?

So, what does this mean? I don’t think I’ve really pinned it all down, yet. But I do think this is an over-arching theme for the entire show. I think in some ways, “home” and “family” are synonymous, because home is wherever your family is. It’s not a physical location.

But we started out with Rick looking for Carl and Lori. Then Merle went missing, and Daryl searched for him. Everyone searched for Sophia when she disappeared. And the list goes on and on. So it’s a big theme. I’ve always said Andy didn’t leave the show just to spend more time with his family. That’s a happy bonus, I’m sure. But this was always a planned part of the story. Now Michonne is actively looking for Rick, we see Daryl searching for his body. And the reason Beth symbolism is thrown in is because he searched for her, but they didn’t show us that and won’t because it would be spoilery. And Beth is alive, even if Daryl doesn’t know it. And yeah, I could go on and on. Just wanted to point out this theme and how important it is. Which leads me to….

The Three Spikes

The last thing I’ll mention is the grouping of the three spikes he sees both by the door and on the outside of the house that we’ve all been trying to interpret. I kind of had a breakthrough the other night. But the thing is, it’s not just a breakthrough on the three spikes.

It’s kind of a breakthrough on the ENTIRE rule of threes theme. It’s actually kind of epic.

So here’s how I came to this. I was going over the template in my head, yet again, that I mentioned is shown both here, in 6x03, and that will be in the spinoff. So let’s run through it. We’ll use this episode, 10x18, as the example. So, Daryl is searching for Rick, right? And Carol wants him to stop and come back with her to where Zeke and Henry are. Those are two possible choices for him. But there’s also a third: staying with Leah.

Similarly, in 6x03, Daryl goes searching for Rick, rather than staying with Sasha and Abraham. Those are the two things he’s trying to decide between, and he eventually goes back to Sashraham.

Now, there is actually a third choice there. It’s just that Daryl doesn’t seriously consider it. The third choice is going back to Alexandria to help them. And this IS addressed in the episode because they talk about how they don’t know what happened, but some loud noise pulled half the herd off the road. We, the viewers, know it’s the Wolves, but Daryl, Sasha, and Abe really didn’t know what was going on there. And who is back in Alexandria, spear-heading the defensive against the wolves? Carol!

So you see what I mean. There are three possible choices there: find Rick, go with Carol, or stay with Sashraham. And I’ve said forever that Sashraham = Beth/Bethyl. And of course so does Leah. So the third choice is always the one that represents Beth.

Do you see where I’m going with this? If not, I’ll just tell you. This represents three different paths for Daryl. They’ll diverge at some point and he’ll have to make a choice about which one to take. And then I realized—duh!—they’re all actually represented for us here in this episode. Not only because of what I said above, but because Leah lays them out in her ultimatum. Where do you belong 1) out looking endlessly for your brother 2) back at the communities with your family (i.e. Carol) or 3) here with me.

So those are the three paths that he’ll have to choose between during the spinoff. That’s what the spikes are about, because they specifically dealt with his three choices in this episode. But that may even be the reason they used the rule of threes around Beth to begin with. She’s the third and correct path.

Want more proof this is a thing? @wdway sent me this pic after I first told her about it:

And guys, go back and watch this. When he gets to the crossroads, the camera pans around him, showing him being unsure about which path to take.

Then, while writing this up, I remembered that this did this in 6x03 as well:

On the left is Daryl on his bike, rejoining Sasha and Abraham who are coming down from the top.

Yeah, 3 paths. 3 spikes. Rule of 3s. Who’s excited for the spinoff? 🙋

Now, just one more thing not add to this I think you all will like. In re-watching 9x05, there’s the part where Rick hallucinates Shane, right? Well, part of their conversation there is about the “third man.” And I’ve talked about this before, but probably not nearly enough, because it’s more important than most of us give it credit for. Rick and Shane talk about when Rick was shot in 1x01 before the apocalypse hit. They say they thought there was only 2 men, but there was a third they didn’t know about and “that changed everything.”

I always saw that as perhaps a statement about Grady. Because they should have had three prisoners for the hostage exchange, where Dawn only had two (Carol and Beth). But after Rick killed Lambson, they only had two. If they’d had three, Dawn wouldn’t have been able to demand Noah back, because it would have been an even exchange. So the third man would have changed everything.

Another way to think about it is that, if the shot that hit Beth didn’t come from Dawn—and it REALLY didn’t, y’all) then there was another threat somewhere that they couldn’t see and didn’t know about. If they had, they might have been able to guard against it. See what I mean? I genuinely believe they used Rick’s arc in 1x01 as a jumping off point for planning what happened at Grady.

So, when I rewatched 9x05 and heard this conversation between Rick and Shane yet again, it made me think of the three spikes and Daryl’s 3 paths. So what if he only knows about the two paths he can take: look for Rick or go with Carol. But there’s a third path he’s not aware of, yet. But the third path changes everything. Because that’s where/how he’ll find Beth.

Eh, eh?

Okay, well, I’ve given you enough to chew on today. These are just some things we’ve been discussing from the episode that just keeps on giving. ;D Meanwhile, episode 19 will be airing in a few days, and it will be fabulous, too. Probably not quite as epic as 10x18, but still fabulous. ;D Thoughts?

#beth greene #beth greene lives #beth is alive #beth is coming #td theory #td theories #team delusional #team defiance #beth is almost here #bethyl

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krreader · 4 years

Text

EXO reacting to you, a foreign idol, receiving hate after your relationship went public.

pairing: exo x foreign idol!reader fandom: exo warnings: language ; racism genre: angst ; fluff word count: 1.5k+

a/n: I wish the reality were a lot different, but with jongdae having received so much backlash.. god I just hope people will leave them all alone and let them love in peace.

kim minseok

Concerts were supposed to be a fun time for both idols, as well as fans.

But seeing stuff like this always made Minseok regret his career choices.

All he could do was stare at the racist sign that a fan was holding up in disbelief, maybe even a little bit of sadness and disappointment that one of his fans was behaving like so.

His band members must have seen his reaction, Junmyeon, as the leader instantly nodding towards the fan and a manager handled the rest from there.

She was gone, but what she had written on that sign was branded in his memory.

“You okay?” you asked later that night when you joined him in bed.

Minseok opened his mouth and looked at you, but then he closed it again and smiled, shaking his head a little, “Just tired.”

This wasn't something that you needed to know. He wanted to protect you from that world of hate as much as possible.

kim junmyeon

Junmyeon was so busy bowing to the artists that passed him that he didn't even notice your band being among them at first.

But the moment his eyes landed on you, his smile instantly widened.

PDA wasn't exactly something you could do here and you both knew it, neither of you was this stupid.

But the smile that Junmyeon had only reserved for you seemed to be enough to start a shit-storm online.

“Why is he only smiling at her like that? It's disgusting.”

“Does she think she's special or something? Somebody remind her that she's not.”

“Can she just go back to where she came from? It’s annoying me.”

Were just examples of hatefulness spread in online forums and the likes. But Junmyeon made sure that you wouldn't read them.

Right after the award show, he and you decided to – instead of going to the after-party – go straight home and just enjoy some alone time together.. without your phones.

You knew he was looking out for you when every time you wanted to check your messages, he pulled you closer and kissed you instead and every time you’d ask why, he’d just laugh and tell you that he couldn’t get enough of you.

And well.. his strategy worked.

zhang yixing

Yixing must have thought that with him barely being a part of EXO's promotions anymore, that fans would lay off of him and you.

Maybe give him a pass and let him live and love in peace.

That's why he brought you to the film premiere as his date, because he truly thought it would be fine.

But damn, fans were viscous.

The moment he and you stepped out of the car, they were screaming at you to get back to where you came from and it was.. a mess, to say the least.

Nevertheless, Yixing was proud to have you by his side and every chance he got for an interview, he mentioned it, wanting to show these “fans” that their racism wouldn't change his opinion on you in the slightest and that it was absolutely not appropriate here or anywhere else.

But he knew that this night wasn't easy for you, even if you smiled throughout the entire time and he was glad when it was finally over again and you were back home in the safety of your own four walls. There, he could at last wrap his arms around you and hold you close as you were finally allowed to shed a few tears.

“I'm so sorry,” he kept whispering into your hair, “I love you so much, never forget it.”

byun baekhyun

“Are you even able to communicate?” one of the interviewers asked Baekhyun after the topic of you and him having started dating came up.

And the question caught him off guard because, “You've.. talked with her.. lots of times before? And she spoke.. perfect Korean?”

“Well, yeah, but it's just.. she's not Korean.”

It was so stupid and everyone in the room knew it. Some of his band members snorted, others even started laughing, while Baekhyun just really didn't know what else to say to this.

“I think you handled it well,” you said later that night when you sat down next to him on the couch, “They just want gossip and they'll do anything to get it.”

“I just wish they'd stop disregarding you so much just because you’re not Korean.”

“My confidence is a lot bigger than they think,” you smiled and kissed his forehead, “I'll be fine, babe. You don’t have to worry about me,”

He pulled you into his arms with a sigh and held you there until the world felt like a better place again.

kim jongdae

Jongdae put down his phone with a heavy sigh after having read yet another headline that was so similar to all the ones before.

“South Korean idol Kim Jongdae dating foreign idol (Y/N) and fans aren't happy about it.”

It was a Korean article and people knew, even by his name alone, that Jongdae was Korean, but they still had to emphasize it.. because you weren't. And that was apparently an issue.

“How are you?” he texted you later.

“I'm okay, don't worry about me,” you replied only a few minutes later.

“But I am worrying. Don't read the articles, okay?”

“I'm fine, Jongdae, really. Media can suck my non-existing dick.”

After reading that line, Jongdae immediately started to smile and nod to himself.

You were right.

The media could sick his dick too.

park chanyeol

“What are you doing?” Chanyeol leaned down to press a kiss against the back of your head, his eyebrows furrowing when you were watching one of his music videos.

“Nothing..”

But from the way your voice sounded and the fact that your shoulders were slumped when you walked into the kitchen, it really didn't look like nothing.

So he followed you and pestered you for as long as it took for you to finally tell him what was bothering you.

“People keep comparing us to you guys. Saying that we have fewer views and that we're less popular and that it's all my fault.”

“(Y/N), they're just jealous.”

“I know.. but our relationship.. it's ruining my group's image, Chanyeol. These girls have worked so hard and it's..-” you let out a heavy sigh and shook your head.

“Hey,” he took a step closer and grabbed your chin to make you look at him, “Nobody is ruining anything, especially not you. You are an essential part of your group and without you, they'd lose an important puzzle piece.”

He must have known that you were hinting at leaving the group, but that wasn't something that Chanyeol would stand by and just watch. You had worked hard too.. and he wouldn't let you stop now just because some jealous idiots thought they had the power to destroy your life.

do kyungsoo

“I'm sure the situation isn't easy for you,” his new make-up artist said as she was doing the finishing touches on his face, “In regards to (Y/N), I mean.”

He didn't want to talk about it, but he appreciated her concern, so he said: “Thank you.”

“It's not easy when someone clings to you so hard that you can't get rid of them. I've been there.. but you'll escape the relationship eventually.”

That had him stare at her with confusion, “Wait... what?”

“I heard foreigners are extremely clingy... that's probably why.”

Needless to say, she had her job for exactly one day.

Kyungsoo wouldn't work with a racist, especially not one that disrespected his girlfriend like that.

kim jongin

They were doing a fan sign right now, the first one after Jongin's and your relationship got exposed.

He had been incredibly nervous beforehand, but so far, everyone was nothing but kind to him. Nobody had even mentioned you.

Until one fan came up.

“Don't you think you should find someone like yourself?”

Jongin stopped writing on her album momentarily, his eyes still on his writing, but then he continued with his signature with a smile, “She is like myself. An idol. An artist.”

“But she's a foreigner. She's not really like us.”

Jongin clenched his jaw, then looked up with a sweet, but very fake smile, “She's a human being. A very kind one. I hope that can be respected.”

The girl would have liked nothing more than to argue with him about this, but the manager ushered her to keep going and Jongin was with the next fan that was a lot nicer than the one before.

He was just glad that you hadn't been here to listen to what she had said.

oh sehun

“Hey, I just wanted to call you,” Sehun smiled as he accepted your call, but when he could hear you cry, he instantly froze, “What happened?”

“Are you sure this is good, Sehun? I don't think anyone approves.”

“What do you mean?” he furrowed his eyebrows and quickly hurried into an empty corridor where he could speak to you in peace.

“The fans.. your fans, they all.. hate me.”

Sehun let out a heavy sigh and closed his eyes for a moment.

So you had read all the nasty comments.

“(Y/N), don't read them. The people that write these things are not in their right state of mind. These people don't matter.”

Of course, it was easier for Sehun to just say these things as he was not the victim in this situation, at least not directly. But he still felt for you, of course he did, he loved you. All he could do was be there for you and continuously tell you and show you just how much you meant to him.

Your nationality didn't change that, despite what other people seemed to think

#exo scenario #exo imagine #exo reaction #exo x reader #exo #reader #requests #kpop imagine #kpop scenario #kpop reaction

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lizallanapologist · 4 years

Text

The problematic behavior of Tomdaya stans; a thread

Some of you might not be aware of the stalkerish problematic stuff tomdaya stans have done with Tom and Zendaya’s life but it’s gotten to the point where Tom’s own brothers protect with big scrutiny every single female in Tom’s life because they fear they’re going to get bullied or harassed. This is not OK and this has to stop so we’re exposing their toxic behavior.

This is only to bring awareness and we do not condom any hate or death threats, don’t send hate to tomdaya accounts, either block them or report them but don’t bully them. Many of them might need professional help dealing with the fact that Tom and Z are not together due to the fact that they created an illusion in their heads for a long time but that doesn’t mean some of them aren’t plenty manipulative and love to get away with bullying and harassment.

If you don’t know, Tom was recently seen with another woman on his instagram, not going to say the name and please don’t try to find out about her, the relevant information is in this post and all of the private information regarding her is being protected for the same reasons. Many stans decided to apply the same treatment to her as they did to Olivia. If you don’t know what happened last year, all information is here. The fact that this kind of bullying and harassment got overlooked is horrifying.

This specific behavior doesn’t apply to all of the stans but the vast majority is on the same page.

A big thanks to all the blogs who contributed with information and their writing in this post.

STALKING

1. Tomdaya stans have made an entire thread/timeline of events in Tom and Zendaya's life that they manipulated so it can be seen as proof of them dating. They stalk every single part of their lives, from paying stalkerish apps to review their instagram activities daily to having a constant GPS to know their exact locations everyday. They ask twitter accs, owners of restaurants/stores, people close to them information about their whereabouts/the things they buy or eat/who they were with, etc.

They order their ‘’interactions’’ with specific dates and they even know information you shouldn’t know about them.

They pay for apps that helps them stalk their every move. That’s right, they take every like as proof of them being together.

They hide behind the pretext that they're celebrities and this is what they've signed up for but neither Tom nor Zendaya have signed up for constant daily harassment of their partners in life.

HARASSMENT OF PARTNERS

Tom was seen last year with a blonde girl called Olivia, everyone speculated that was his girlfriend and that was something everyone should’ve respected since it’s Tom’s life and he’s in control of it, instead, many fans including Tom H. crazy fans and tomdaya stans, decided to stalk and harass Olivia to the point she had to make her account private. They started bullying her by publicly calling her names like ‘’Olive Oil’’, ‘’Ugly old woman’’, ‘’Ugly fake bitch’’ among other names. They continuously compare her with Zendaya and write on her friends and family members’ social media and ask them to tell Olivia nasty things. You really think this is ok?

Same is happening with the girl Tom was seen with. Tom’s own brothers asked several people to take down and delete the video because they were disrupting her privacy. Many stans didn’t care and started all over again harassing the girl. (I’m not posting images or the identity of this new girl in hopes that this helps maintain a little big of privacy for her.)

However here are some examples of them harassing Olivia:

’’I saw a troubling post on twitter about this fan dming another fan saying that they’d kill her (Olivia). That they’d find a way. So that “the fans can have him all to ourselves” - source

MANIPULATING THE NARRATIVE

Tomdaya stans and some Tom Holland crazy stans love to harass Tom Holland to the point that they tag family members and friends only because he decided to go out in public with Olivia. They call him cheater, manipulator, a dumbass, made fun of him because Tom is dyslexic calling him an illiterate, mocked him and tried to cancel him in every opportunity given by manipulating everyone into thinking some of these ‘’facts’’ are true.

Many fans don’t know better and go to social media to frame Tom as a scumbag because many tomdaya stans have convinced the public of this.

This same issue occurs with Zendaya. Her known boyfriend; Jacob Elordi, is frequently called a cheater and is being investigated every five seconds on every social media, candid, interaction ever. Many fans are already calling him cheater, telling everyone Zendaya’s changed her behavior thanks to Jacob and that she needs help.

Source

BULLYING

The definition of cyberbullying according to Stopbullying.gov:

“Cyberbullying is bullying that takes place over digital devices like cell phones, computers, and tablets. Cyberbullying can occur through SMS, Text, and apps, or online in social media, forums, or gaming where people can view, participate in, or share content. Cyberbullying includes sending, posting, or sharing negative, harmful, false, or mean content about someone else. It can include sharing personal or private information about someone else causing embarrassment or humiliation. Some cyberbullying crosses the line into unlawful or criminal behavior. “

Examples of cyberbullying on Tumblr from good ole Toutdesuite360:

https://toutdesuite360.tumblr.com/post/190572803098/faces-haha-ive-heard-this-has-been-memed-when

Making fun of Jacob Elordi’s wealth… but that isn’t that only thing that the Tomdaya stans have done.

She basically implied that Olivia looked like an elderly lady, and she permitted her followers to humiliate her.

Funny, that a middle aged woman who has never revealed her face on her blog is bullying a young woman.

(She may have deleted the link to save her a** on the post with the Cher pictures, but thankfully @crazypeopleonfandom took screenshots of this post; I got most of my photos from them)

The next aren’t pertaining to the ‘innocent’ Toutdesuite360, just some random jerks from Twitter/Instagram. If you have the time, you can read through them.

See the pictures above and below for reference.

Labelling Zendya, Jacob E., Tom, and Olivia as cheaters, when there was no confirmed relationship between Tom and Z, and Jacob broke up with Cari already is plain disrespectful. These are type of claims are considered slander, and I’m surprised that the people who own these accounts haven’t been rightfully sued.

And remember when I talked about the repetition of people tagging Tom and Z’s family for their ‘thoughts’? Why are you tagging Nikki in your post?

Calling Olivia, once again, a vulgar word that shouldn’t be used for any woman.

This person and many other tomdayas are harassing Zendaya and Tom by tagging them repeatedly. Now we know why Tom stopped using Twitter, and why he may be taking breaks from social media.

And, as pointed out in another point on the thread: Tom has dyslexia! I easily ignore the posts that tease him about his lips, but when it comes to his disability, that crosses the line. It is unacceptable to bully someone just because your fantasy relationship doesn’t seem so real now.

Before I finish this point, I just want to remind people that celebrities are humans too. Everyone has feelings, and even if they haven’t seen these posts, it is still harmful to post this kind of information on your account. Fans who are young (or naive) may see these posts, thus making them believe that Tom actually cheated on Z, and that Z is really with Jacob as ‘payback’ to Tom. Bullying is still an ongoing issue, and maybe you should stop harassing/humiliating people on your platform.

DEATH THREATS

Olivia, Tom and his family, friends, Zendaya, Jacob Elordi, etc. They were sent death threats as a result of a fictional ship. This is truly upsetting and we’ve shown some proof of that above and it’s truly sickening how many of them really want to attack Olivia in public only because of a few photographs.

DEBUNKING EVIDENCE

While we don’t know anything for sure, we need to trust and respect what Tom and Zendaya have said several times: they were never together and they were just friends. This is a topic that makes them feel uncomfortable and tomdaya stans decide to twist their words every time they want to clarify the situation, saying they’re hiding their relationship and that they’ve been hiding it for over 3 years.

Stop believing everything SpideyParker on YouTube says, that person desperately wants them together so they’ll do anything in their power to make it seem like that they’re ’’still together’’. All of their evidence is also nothing but scraps. I can also make a video cropping out certain individuals from the frame to make it look like Tom is with someone or I can also investigate every tiny detail to a borderline degree to make it seem like Zendaya is dating someone. It’s really easy to manipulate the truth, so don’t fall for these things so easily. Check with the real sources, Tom and Zendaya. Trust and respect what they say it’s not your job to investigate and figure their lives out.

Their evidence of the relationship is ridiculous, stuff like them wearing the same clothes,

because obviously there’s no way this jacket is in any random store in the world...This is a unique jacket, made by Tom and Z specifically...And it’s not even the same jacket. If we’re going by their logic, then

More, more, more and more.

Source

Robert Downey Jr. and Tom have been in a relationship for a long time...

Angourie, Remy and Tom wearing the same jacket.

I have no idea what’s going on with the freaking necklace you swear with blood that Zendaya gave him but that’s hardly something special:

Matching necklace with Olivia.

Avengers necklace.

He likes necklaces, nothing special here.

'’Tom only goes to Zendaya’s home, and only goes out with her!’’

Tom Holland went to RDJ's house to watch Black Panther with him.

Tom and RDJ facetime daily.

Obviously, his only friend is Zendaya...

Look at him and Zendaya there, wow.

‘‘Tom looks at her with heart eyes and in a very special way!’‘

Excuse me, what is he supposed to do? Ignore Zendaya and look somewhere else every time she talks?��

He literally looks at everyone the same way.

‘‘He only does Spider-Man because he wants to be the Peter Parker to his Mary Jane, one of the most romantic comic book couples!’‘

I can’t believe I once read this as proof but I haven’t forgotten about it.

Interview with Tom and Laura:

“Is Zendaya’s character Mary Jane Watson?’’

Tom Holland: “No, no! This is one of those rumours, that like, we’ve all said it’s not true.

Laura Harrier: It’s not true!

Tom Holland: Like, we keep on… You guys keep building yourselves up for disappointment.

Laura Harrier: Unless we don’t know how this started? Because you guys are gonna see this movie and be like “…Ugh.” She’s Michelle!

Tom Holland: She’s a character called Michelle.

Laura Harrier: She’s playing Michelle.

Tom Holland: 100%. Hands down. Her character’s called Michelle. And she’s sort of this weird, quirky one in the friendship group that Peter has. She’s funny, but she’s super strange.

Laura Harrier: Yeah, super dry humour.

Tom Holland: She’s 100% not Mary Jane. It’s funny, everyone’s like “Is she Mary Jane?” and I’m like NO, I’M TELLING YOU! SHE’S NOT MARY JANE!

Source

‘‘He did the Will Smith thing with her, he loves her!’‘

‘’He only ever talks about her! He only praises her!’’

Angourie Rice.

Robert Downey Jr, 2, 3

Laura Harrier, 2

Elizabeth Olsen.

Jacob Batalon.

Chris Hemsworth.

Jake Gyllenhaal.

And the list goes on and on.

‘‘He always goes to her special events only! He only goes to her parties! He only goes to hospitals with her! He was on the set of Euphoria with her!’‘

How about, he goes out with her and everyone else in group and individually? He goes out with Harrison alone, with Jacob alone, with Laura alone, etc. I love how many of them love to leave out certain people to make everyone believe it’s only the two of them. And he doesn’t only goes to hospitals with her, he’s gone with many other people and he does it because he’s a good person, not because he’s on a date with Zendaya.

Tom AND Jacob visit Zendaya on the set of the Greatest Showman.

Tom and friends celebrating Harrison’s birthday party.

Tom on a double date.

Tom going to Joe Russo’s restaurant to get an exclusive cooking lesson from Jessica Largey.

Tom on birthday parties.

Tom, Laura, Harrison and Harry out for dinner in Brazil.

Tom, Brie Larson, Tessa Thompson, and Zachary Levi in a club in Brazil.

Tom, Laura, Jacob, Harrison in a pool party.

RDJ & Tom Holland visit Jon’s restaurant and participate on his show.

Tom Holland visits Doctor Strange’s set.

Tom Holland, Ciara Bravo, Joe Russo visit haunted attraction.

He’s a good person and loves supporting his friends.

‘‘He only has chemistry with her!’‘

Tom and RDJ’s extraordinary chemistry.

Tom and Jake’s chemistry.

Tom and Jacob’s chemistry.

Tom and Laura’s chemistry.

Tom and Daisy’s chemistry.

Tom and Chris Pratt’s chemistry.

Also Will Smith, Chris Hemsworth, etc.

Look below for Ciara and Tom’s chemistry.

Like I said before, maybe he’s a good actor and that’s it?

‘‘Their FFH kiss was too real and magical!’‘

Spoiler alert for Cherry

Fan about witnessing Tom’s kiss with Ciara Bravo:

His reaction about kissing Laura Harrier:

‘‘He LOVES touching her’‘

I’m sorry, is he supposed to be scared of touching people?

This is it. This is the big touch they always talk about and the only times they’ve ever held hands is in manips or in FFH, but that doesn’t count, those are fictional characters. Well...

Maybe he’s a touchy person. Consider that.

’’She’s the only one that knows him well!’’

How well do Zendaya, Jacob, & Laura know Tom?

I’m sure Harrison, RDJ, his friends and others know him pretty well too.

And only because he knows she likes ice cream doesn't mean she’s his ultimate soulmate or something blown out of proportion.

‘‘He’s only a gentleman with her!’‘

Tom saves Gina Rodriguez

Tom rescues fan

Karen Gillan

‘‘He looked way too in love with MJ to be fake’‘

Nope.

Nope 2

Nope 3

It’s called acting, pretty sure you guys know by now he’s good.

‘’They’re inseparable!’‘

Jacob, Tom and Harrison

Also, why is it that every female in his life is his cousin, aunt, close childhood friend or ‘’he probably hates her’’ for you?

They’ve said this multiple times but:

In an interview with Elle, Tom said he is not involved with anyone at the moment but is "definitely a relationship person." And when addressing the rumors, he says it’s uncomfortable and annoying when people ship him and Zendaya together.

Zendaya also denied the claims, telling Variety Magazine that she and Tom were simply ‘just friends’.

You can ship them if you want, as a bromance or cute chemistry, but not at the expense of someone else. Not when you violate their privacy, their lives and specially not when you bully, harass and stalk every detail of their lives.

Zendaya is clearly very happy with Jacob Elordi:

Let her have that. No, she doesn’t look miserable with him, no, he didn’t change her style or her personality. No, she doesn’t dress differently because of him. She is the same as always, she looks even happier. Let her be. This is good for her. She has every right to go out in public with her boyfriend. And for the love of god, stop commenting on her instagram posts ‘’warning’’ her that Jacob is going to cheat on her. Hopefully that won’t happen ever.

And no, they’re not going to magically ’’get back together’’ when Spider-Man 3 starts filming, stop wishing bad luck on Zendaya and Jacob’s relationship. Tom is not going to magically realize how ‘’wrong’’ he was for ‘’leaving’’ Zendaya. He never left her, he’s her friend.

All of this have gotten to the point where Tom can’t have a friendship with a female and he has to ‘’protect’’ them every time he wants to interact with them. Do you guys seriously think this is ok? Are you really a fan of his if this is how you want him to live? Controlling him all the time?

Do you realize how wrong and unfair it is for the other partner every time you comment in every single picture on instagram, twitter, etc about how ‘’cute’’ Tom and Zendaya are? About how ‘’ugly’’ Olivia is? How about when you compare Zendaya and Olivia, or every single female in Tom’s life? Or when you comment on Zendaya’s instagram telling her she is different now and that you don’t like her now because she’s changed for Jacob? Telling her that Jacob is going to cheat on her? Stop sending death threats to the partners, stop tagging their families in your ‘’evidence/proof’’ posts/tweets. Just because they don’t voice these things doesn’t mean they don’t read them.

Being sincere, if you all, as a collective; really, genuinely cared about Tom, this is the last thing you would wanna pull. In your endless obsession with thinking you have a right to dictate the life of a man simply because he's famous; actually stopped once to consider how this is possibly making Tom and Zendaya feel?? You are basically sending the message that nobody is enough, that him being happy isn't enough, that he won't ever be allowed to be happy until he gets with the person YOU think is best for him. Fucking abhorrent, how they don't have a choice on who they choose to fucking love. This is how you make a celebrity jaded. THIS is how you make a celebrity hate you. And he will, unless you stop your bullshit, and treat him; and whoever he decides to be with, like human beings.

When you focus only on two people it’s easy to believe anything, try and see the bigger picture. Allow Zendaya and Tom to enjoy their lives without harassing them and their partners.

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