#they’re both the same amount of each but they’re different in how they present

[wrightandco]

edgeworth is a jerk on the outside and kind on the inside and phoenix is kind on the outside and a jerk on the inside

[dandylovesturtles]

Made myself emotional over the “Leo and Donnie chose to be twins” headcanon.

———

“By the way, it’s Leo and Donnie’s birthday next Thursday. You’re coming, right?”

Draxum looked up from his work organizing next week’s lunch schedule to look at Michelangelo, sitting on the counter and swinging his feet. Celebrating individual birthdays wasn’t a thing that the yokai did, but Draxum had been forced to accept that the boys could not be dissuaded from this human tradition. He’d been to two birthday parties now, for Michelangelo and Raphael respectively, eating cake and presenting them with some small trinket he purchased.

He’d known that he would have to go to more birthday parties at some point. But he wasn’t expecting two at once.

“Why on the same day? I can’t imagine the blue one wanting to share.” Actually, he couldn’t imagine Donatello wanting to share, either.

“Oh,” said Michelangelo with a laugh. “That’s ‘cause they’re twins!”

Draxum stared at him. “Twins? What kind of nonsense is that?”

Mikey tilted his head. “What do you mean?”

“They’re entirely different species, for starters,” Draxum pointed out.

“I mean, we all are, but we’re still brothers.”

“Yes, by virtue of your shared DNA donor and the circumstances of your raising.” Draxum waved that off. “But “twins” refers to a situation where two children are born at once, especially as the result of a split of a fertilized egg. Which is absolutely impossible in the case of Leonardo and Donatello. Even if I were to be charitable and simply consider them “twins” for having the same hatch day, I can tell you they do not.”

“Uh, okay,” said Michelangelo, unimpressed. “But they’ve always been twins, so I don’t think it matters to them.”

“Why not? I would think it would matter to Donatello especially, since he claims to be scientifically minded.”

Michelangelo laughed. “Not everything is about science, Barry. Not even to Donnie.”

“Then his decisions about when to apply science and when not to are inconsistent and confusing.”

“Well, it’s their birthday, so they get to pick.”

“I am certain that is not how birthdays work.”

“It’s how it works for us!” Michelangelo slipped off the counter. “We’ll see you on Thursday, right? It’ll mean a lot to them if you come!”

Draxum was fairly sure Leonardo in particular would prefer he didn’t, but that didn’t matter. Now he had a mission: he had to correct this strange incongruence.

“Yes, I will be there.”

“Yay!” cheered Michelangelo. “Okay, see ya Dad!”

He squeezed Draxum around the waist on his way out. Draxum was finding he didn’t mind that as much as he used to.

———

Leonardo and Donatello’s party was just as loud and obnoxious as the other two. Blue and purple decorations covered every inch of the old subway station, strange music blared from unseen speakers, and a horrendous amount of junk food was spread out over a table. It was the same group of people present today as there ever was, the eclectic mix of humans and yokai that the boys considered family, but it felt like a crowd three times the size with the amount of noise being made.

Draxum stood off on his own for most of it, his slim birthday present already delivered to the table stacked with gifts. He’d been a little shocked when Donatello and then Leonardo came by to say hello, since he’d been prepared to be ignored by both of them. It was… nice, maybe, that they did that. Even if Leonardo just wanted to make jokes at his expense.

For most of the party, the two birthday boys seemed to be competing with each other for attention. In fact, the longer he took it all in, the whole affair seemed like a clash of ideas. The purple decorations were neat and tidy, geometric patterns and hard angles. The blue decorations were whimsical, uncoordinated, and haphazard, and there were places it seemed someone had deliberately covered up some of the purple with the blue. Leonardo wanted to play rock music and Donatello wanted to play techno. The cake was a mess because they’d both requested different themes for the decorations. There were arguments between the two of them every few minutes, and according to the human girl April this was “typical behavior.”

But why? They weren’t really twins. They didn’t have to share this day.

Hopefully Draxum’s plan would fix all this nonsense.

When it was time for gifts, Leonardo loudly declared that he was going first, sparking an argument. They squabbled for a bit before agreeing to play rock-paper-scissors, which was apparently what they did every year.

Leonardo won the game and celebrated obnoxiously while Donatello scowled at him. Then he gestured at the gift table - which Draxum, in his efforts to stay out of the main throng, was closest to.

“Hey, Barry! Grab me a gift! Make it a good one.”

Draxum sighed but reached over to take one of the blue packages, checking the tag to make sure it was for Leonardo. “This one is… to Leo from Donnie,” he read.

“Oh no, not that one. Our presents to each other are always last.”

“Because they always get sappy about it,” said April with a laugh.

“Do not!” yelled Leonardo at the same time Donatello hissed, “You take that back!”

“Uh, yeah you do, and you know I’m right.”

Draxum ignored the petty argument to look back at the gift table. If they weren’t going to be satisfied with his choice, he might as well give them his own gift.

He lifted it, in its sensible brown packaging, off the table and handed it over.

“Why not start with this? It’s to both of you from me.”

“Both of us at once?” asked Leonardo. “Oh man, you’re throwing off our whole system, Barry.”

“Yes, but he’s giving it to you,” Donatello pointed out, “which means my turn is still next.”

“Uh, no, if it’s for both of us then it counts for both of us, which means it comes back around to me!”

“Ooooh no, you do not get to loophole your way into opening two presents in a row-“

“Ahem!” Draxum loudly cleared his throat, getting their attention. “Would you please just open it?”

“Yikes,” said Leonardo. “Touchy.”

“Some people just don’t understand the sanctity of opening birthday gifts,” said Donatello with a sniff. But he leaned in to watch as Leonardo tore off the wrapping paper and opened the box.

They were both silent for a moment, staring at it. Then Leonardo said, “Uh, no offense, Barry, but what is this?”

“It’s a… scientific study on how twins are formed during the gestational period,” said Donatello, pulling the paper clipped thesis from the box. “Oh, there are more in here… Also about twins.”

“Uh…” Leonardo blinked at it, clearly bewildered. Well, he was always a bit slow. “Thanks…? I think?”

“Not that I don’t appreciate the scientific literature,” said Donatello, “but this isn’t really my area of study and Leo does better with training manuals and textbooks than research papers.” He looked up at Draxum. “Is there something about this we aren’t getting?”

“Yes there is,” said Draxum, sweeping his hand around at the entire party. “I am here to correct your mistaken assumption that you are twins.”

The room fell silent. Donatello set the paper back in the box, staring at him. Leonardo’s brow creased in anger.

“We are twins, though,” he said, setting the box aside like it was burning him.

“No, you are not. There is simply no way that the two of you could be twins. It is biologically impossible.”

“You think that I’m so stupid I don’t know that?” Donatello demanded, getting up from the chair he was sitting in. “Are you doubting my intelligence?”

“Yes, if you honestly think you are twins with him, then I am.”

“Uhhh, Draxum,” said Michelangelo quickly, stepping between him and the now furious Donatello, “this was a… funny joke, but you can stop now-“

“This is not a joke. I am simply explaining the facts.”

“Yeah, well,” now Leonardo was on his feet, too, “the facts are that me and Donnie are twins. Always have been, always will be.”

“You are not,” Draxum insisted. “And given what I have seen here today, I’d think you’d both be relieved, since you clearly don’t enjoy being twins!”

Both boys looked like they’d just been slapped in the face. The rest of the room had gone completely silent, like everyone was collectively holding their breath.

Donatello broke first, turning on his heel and marching out of the room, his hands balled into fists and his shoulders hunched up as high as they could go. “Dee!” called Leonardo, and then he was scurrying off after him. There was the sound of a heavy door slamming, then silence.

It didn’t last long.

“Draxum!” roared the rat, actually getting up from his chair to get in Draxum’s face. “You come in here and upset my boys on their own birthday!?”

“Seriously not cool, Drax,” said the human April. Cassandra shook her head in shared disappointment behind her.

Draxum pushed Lou Jitsu back, scowling at his accusers. “I was only explaining reality! This is really the rat’s fault for letting their delusion go on so long.”

“Delusion!?”

“Barry!”

“Rat!?”

“Ooookay,” said Raphael suddenly, stepping his way into the middle of the fray and starting to herd Draxum back toward the exit. “That’s enough of that for now.”

“I am simply trying to explain-“

“Trust me, hoss, you wanna step away from this one,” said Raphael, and his tone was angry but surprisingly measured. “Come on.”

They retreated to the sewer tunnels outside the subway station. The smell was much worse out here, and Draxum wrinkled his nose.

“Alright.” Raphael heaved a sigh, folding his arms. “So here’s the deal. Mikey likes you, and I guess I kinda do too, so I’m gonna try to help you before you completely torpedo your chances with the rest of the guys. Which, you kinda did already, but maybe we can turn it around.”

“I still don’t understand why they’re so upset,” said Draxum. “Surely it was obvious they aren’t twins.”

“Uh, yeah, they know they aren’t twins by bio-whatever,” agreed Raphael. “They ain’t stupid.”

“Hmm.” Draxum turned up his nose. “Donatello isn’t stupid, maybe.”

“Leo ain’t stupid, either, he just pretends like it.” Raphael pinched his brow. “Listen, that isn’t the point - the point is they already know they didn’t come from the same egg or hatch the same day or whatever. They’re just twins anyway.”

“But how? That doesn’t make sense!”

Raphael sighed again. “Alright, look. Dad didn’t know when we hatched, right? But we all wanted birthday parties like we saw on TV, so he let us pick.”

“Yes. And for some reason Leonardo and Donatello chose the same day.” Draxum could figure that much out on his own.

Raphael nodded. “I was the biggest and oldest, and Mikey was the littlest and youngest, and Leo and Donnie were just kinda sandwiched in the middle. I think at first they just wanted a thing. Somethin’ that set them apart from me and Mikey, ya know?”

“Not really,” said Draxum. Raphael glared at him, and he sighed. “But go on.”

“So they picked the same birthday and called themselves twins. I think Pops just so glad they were actually getting along that he agreed to it. And I think he thought once we got to the day, and they realized they were really gonna have to share it, they’d both demand their own day instead. I know I thought that was gonna happen.” He smiled at the memory. “But the day came, and… they fussed the whole time just like they do now. Arguing about what kind of cake they wanted and who got to open their present first. But they didn’t ask to split. They kept it the same day, and they kept calling each other twins and it just stuck, until we didn’t question it anymore.”

“…They are both stubborn,” Draxum pointed out, and Raphael laughed once.

“Yeah, guess they are. But that’s not what this is.” Raphael shrugged. “They chose each other back then. Maybe at first it was just to have a thing, but then it became real. And every single year they keep choosing each other. That’s why they’re twins.”

Choosing each other as twins… Draxum furrowed his brow. “It’s not normally a choice,” he pointed out finally.

“Yeah, well, our family doesn’t get a lot of choices, so just let ‘em have this one, okay?”

“…Fine,” Draxum finally relented. “As long as it’s noted that this is purely a social designation, and not a biological one.”

“Uh, sure, whatever.” Raphael rolled his eyes. “Glad we got that cleared up, though. Think you can come back to the party and behave?”

Draxum wrinkled his nose at that phrasing, but nodded. “Yes. I will not bring it up again.”

“Good!” Raphael’s smile abruptly transitioned into something much more dangerous. “Because if you make my little brothers upset on their birthday again, I’ll remind you what it was like when we were enemies.”

Then the smile was back. “Now let’s go in!”

He walked back to the subway station, leaving Draxum to follow on his own. Draxum couldn’t help but sigh wistfully.

Raphael would have made a great general for his army.

———

The boys had already returned by the time Draxum got back. They were opening more gifts, and he noted they were wearing hoodies now - though they had apparently decided to swap their signature colors. They were smiling and chattering, and any hint of their earlier upset was gone.

Until Draxum stepped into their line of sight, and both of them went rigid, wary of him.

Apparently just talking to the red one was not enough. Draxum would have to do more. What a pain.

But he didn’t want the boys to hate him. So he sighed and launched into it.

“I… am sorry. I shouldn’t have said you aren’t twins.”

The boys looked surprised at that; slowly, their posture loosened back up.

“And… to make up for my present, I will… take the two of you wherever you want to go in the Hidden City.” The next words were painful, and he ground them out. “My treat.”

Leonardo and Donatello shifted their gaze from him to each other. They were silent, but it didn’t seem like they needed to talk to have a conversation.

Then they finally looked back at Draxum, slow grins growing over both their faces.

Eerily matching, very evil grins.

“Oh,” said Leonardo, happily menacing. “I think we can think of something.”

“I concur,” said Donatello in the exact same tone.

Oh, thought Draxum. Maybe they really are twins.

[certifiedlovergirlsstuff]

case of the day | s.r. x liaison!fem reader

everyone was tired. it’s been a week long case out of state with a time zone difference of four hours, everyone was thrown off. but the bad guy was caught, the lives of those taken will sit somewhere in those dark corners of your mind, always giving you reason to try and work just a second faster.

“hey,” a soft voice spoke beside you. it pulled you from your heavy thoughts, you blinked and turned to see that spencer’s joined you on the jet couch. your word search book and highlighters sitting in your lap while spencer held a thick book on string theory, he probably already knows everything about that theory though.

“hi,” greeting him back as you bring yourself back to the present. no one on your team was hurt, everyone is going back to their lives and loved ones. “do you want to get something to eat when we land?”

it’ll be about four in the afternoon when the jet lands, your breakfast and inflight snacks long gone. spencer’s mouth twisted to the side in thought, it was cute. “there’s this indian place if you’d like.” his eyes were alight at the mention of the restaurant, probably a favorite of his.

you smiled small, “i haven’t had much of the flavor, but i’d like to try.” always happy to spend time with spencer outside of the office. you took him to this coffee shop that housed a book nook, he showed you were he has his weekly chess meeting at the park. you’ll have to think of another place to bring him after this.

“you doing okay?” his soft question caused you to keep your eyes on your lap. you weren’t sure why it was this case that’s caused your mind to think the most of, maybe it’s one of those things were after a certain amount it’s your way of reminding you about the severity of your job.

his hand set atop yours, his thumb bringing a comforting motion to your skin. you’ve noticed how spencer’s more okay with touch when it comes to you, elle teases you about it, but you’re happy to know he’s the most comfortable with you.

your eyes focused on spencer’s chin, “do you ever have a case that reminds you how many disturbed people there are? that it’s our job to stop these people before more are killed at their actions.” now bringing your head up a little higher, lids heavy and eyes sorrowful.

you sighed deeply, “i know it’s different between us since you’re in the field and have a gun. and i’m just a liaison dealing with the media, but- anyway.” shrugging off your sentence.

spencer rolled his lips, brows pinching in the middle as he analyzed over your words. his palm was still warming your knuckles, “there was this one case. a guy who was kidnapping then killing families after a week, he took three families before we were called in. and we got him before the fourth family met the same fate, and when he was taken into custody for questioning he said “the fathers are a disgrace. mothers the whore. and a child the mistake.””

you saw his adam’s apple bob when he took a deep swallow. you moved your pinky to graze the side of his hand. “and i just thought, he’s heard and or seen these things to just think that about every family that resembles his. his upbringing was that torn up he only saw one thing, even if the family he was stalking were happily safe and loving to each other.”

spencer leaned his head against the backrest, his eyes a bit glossed over. you just made him relive that case, clear as day for him. with your free hand you let your fingers card through the hair on the side of his head, sweeping over his ear and stopping at his jaw. “i’m sorry. i didn’t mean to make you relive that,” thumb giving a flick beside a freckle.

his fingers circled your wrist, “it’s okay. but also just because our jobs are a little different they’re both still very important to this department. you’re an important member of this team.” raising his brows for extra emphasis.

“thank you,” you whispered. “why don’t you get some rest? here,” having to move your book and highlighters to the side and getting yourself a bit more comfortable. “use my lap.”

“you sure?” “of course.”

spencer shuffled around then set his head to your lap, his long legs stretched and bent to the end of the couch. he stared up at you while you looked down, “is it okay if i touch your hair?” he smiled, “of course.”

with soft, soothing repetition you saw how spencer’s muscles loosened. “tell me about string theory,” just wanting to hear his voice uninterrupted.

“well, string theory is a theoretical framework in which the point-like particles of particle physics are replaced by one-dimensional objects called strings…”

both of you didn’t notice how gideon and hotch were eyeing the both of you near the front of the jet. a tiny smile cracking that stone facade of hotch. “they’re good for each other.”

“it’s always nice to have someone or something important to take comfort in with this line of work. keeps use sane and human.” gideon spoke before returning to his paperwork.

[connabeth]

there is something so personal to me about the stark contrast percy and annabeth represent in regards to parenthood and responsibility because of the difference in their upbringings. percy only intent on going on this quest because it’s a chance to save his mother. annabeth determined to see this quest through to prove herself to her mother. percy interrupting chiron and immediately choosing annabeth as his companion because he thinks she’ll prioritize their duty and wouldn’t betray him (bc they couldn’t possibly be friends). annabeth staunchly defending athena during her confrontation with percy and their encounter with medusa, insisting that she loves her mother. percy having a more bitter outlook on the gods, not seeing medusa as a full monster because of what his mother taught him, not accepting that it’s okay for athena to be an absent parent.

their fundamental differences lie in percy, in spite of his rough childhood, having the privilege of knowing what a mother’s love feels like and annabeth being robbed of it. she’s constantly been neglected or left behind and does not know what it’s like to have someone love you, prioritize you, protect you since day one. like she just wants to be seen!!! she just wants to be loved!!! the closest she can get to a mother’s love is subtle, detached acknowledgement from athena upon completing this quest successfully but she clings onto the notion that this is okay, this is something worth putting her life on the line for because she doesn’t know what a real parent’s love feels like!!! she’s begging for scraps!! she’s aware that it’s not ideal, but she thinks this is the closest to love she can get from a parent. believing that the most minuscule amount of attention from a goddess is worth fighting for because she’s never had a real parental figure in her life besides a fuckass horse who has hundreds of other child soldiers to attend to…she’s as motivated by love as percy is.

and the funniest part of it is, as much as they initially bicker, they’re on the same page the whole time. annabeth, who deeply desires athena’s approval, standing her ground against alecto and killing her sister, refusing to give up on percy. percy, who needs his mother alive and safe, shutting down medusa’s insinuations about annabeth and beheading her. grover making percy understand how important annabeth’s cap is to her as a present from her mother. grover getting both their thick skulls to realize they’re in the same boat, that they’re somehow innately loyal to each other despite their mommy issues because they share the same core principles despite expressing themselves differently.

[vigilskeep]

With Bea being your potential canon Inquisitor, how would your protagonists feel about each other?

keir and minerva don’t easily trust each other. he sees someone manipulative and dangerous who is always acting for her own agenda and doesn’t take proper care of her own people. she sees exactly the kind of big heavily armed human man throwing threats and physical violence around that all her life experiences have taught her wariness and dislike for. they’re both very accustomed to being the scariest thing in the room and have a tendency to get territorial. however, they have ferelden in common (whatever keir’s other thoughts, he will always owe respect to the saviour of his homeland) and someone they love in common (whatever minerva’s other thoughts, she will always owe a helping hand to the person anders cares about, and who kept anders safe when she couldn’t be there). once they get to know each other and have some picture of why the other acts like they do, it’s not all bad. probably. eventually

keir always looks at beatrice and sees someone else. he sees his beloved sister, as the sheltered young andrastian noblewoman she might have been. he sees the sebastian who was once his friend, both his earnest kindness and his inclination for fanaticism. and he sees grand cleric elthina, a woman whose unassuming appearance never changed the amount of power she wielded and what a profound danger she was. he is never sure which of these is closest to the truth and it creates a mixture of protective sympathy and real fear he finds a little sickening. for her side, she finds him somewhat intimidating on a basic interpersonal level. which he... kind of fundamentally is, lmao. arguably they’re both free marcher nobles but they’re from such drastically different worlds of experience all the same. she gets most of her information on him from the excitement and romance of hushed gossip or varric’s stories. the reality has more harsher extremes than she would like. but she wants to believe he’s a hero and that they’re on the same side

minerva harbours particular dislikes of sickly-sweet earnestness, “overly” pious andrastians, warden hero worship, and people who simply have power drop into their lap and then don’t even have any idea what to do with it. beatrice is precisely a combination of those things. she is... not likely to be minerva’s favourite person in the world. however, on minerva’s return from wherever she is, she would forced to admit through gritted teeth that bea is not only genuinely well-intentioned but straightforwardly a political ally. she is literally going to be the one who legitimises the mage rebellion and ushers in the end of the circle of magi. on those grounds, minerva will contain herself from whatever the political equivalent is of unhinging her jaw like a snake and eating the poor girl alive. she would kind of be visibly containing herself from doing that if they ever met and it would be a pretty unsettling experience for everyone involved. bea is at present blissfully unaware of all that and continues to think of minerva as a great warden hero and would hotly defend her against any heinous rumours of blood magic and involving herself in politics more than wardens should

(bea’s perspective needs the most work here because she’s newer. i’m also working with current bea, as in, early game dai bea the bright-eyed idealist who believes andraste has chosen her. she definitely believes in heroes—in a fun, weirdly meta, a little self-important way, she’s probably very aware of the idea of herself, minerva, and keir as the three “protagonists” of the dragon age so far. i think the bea we end up with by trespasser might have a very different take on the other two after she ends up with a very different take on herself, but i haven’t gotten there yet. i suspect that at great personal cost she may even develop a personality minerva would find bearable to be around 😭)

[eloise175]

The Twin Terrors

Two out of my five headcanon calliope kids, along with some of their traits and background! And some crumbs on the other siblings as well if you squint. (Special thanks to @kuroneko1815 who heard me out on my rant about them lol)

Callisto was ecstatic when he saw that the twins’ hair color was the same as Penelope’s; he insisted that the eye color complimented their pretty hair color.

Just like their mother, the siblings have a love for expensive things, especially rubies and emeralds, (blame their father, Callisto covered them in emerald jewelry since they were literal babies).

Growing up, Dante will start to resemble his father more and more, while Eden will take after Penelope with looks.

The twins wear ‘coordinated’ earrings. Dante’s earring has a star, that he wears on his left ear, while Eden has a moon earring on her right ear.

The gold earrings were actually Callisto’s and Penelope’s, but when the twins were born, the married couple immediately knew the earrings would suit the children better. It was a toss on who’d get the star, and who the moon, but in the end with Judy’s and Kayden’s help, they settled for the current arrangement.

Turns out the choice suits the twins nicely since Dante is more outgoing, therefore ‘as bright as a star,’ while Eden can be more secluded, which alludes to the different phases of the moon.

They also have ‘complementary’ moles of sorts. The position of the moles actually defined the placement of the earrings, Dante has a mole under his left eye, and Eden has one underneath her right eye.

Dante is the only one out of the two that has always had dimples, however growing up, only the dimple on the left side remained. The dimples come from Callisto and his mother (whom I decided to call Eleanor), whom had dimples on both sides, while Callisto has only one on his left side.

Dante is the oldest of the two, and takes every chance he gets to rub it in Eden’s face, which consequentially gets him whacked on the head.

They show their love by beating each other up, it’s just how they are.

Chaotic middle children.

Walking potty mouths. The ‘no cussing rule’ only worked on Judith and the baby of the family, Rigel. Kayden can and will curse, however he chooses not to, he has more ‘fancy ways’ of insulting people, but Dante and Eden are the foul-mouthed duo of the family. Sometimes Callisto’s crude language pales in comparison to the twins’ appalling choice of words. The only time they don’t curse at all is in front of Penelope, mom is a scary being that should not be angered in any way.

Stick together like glue, where one goes, the other follows.

They will get angry if someone assumes they like the same things, aka the dumb stereotypes that always follow twins.

Once at a party hosted by a noble, someone tried to serve a meal that had a big amount of peppers in it to Dante just because Eden likes peppers; Dante ended up grabbing that servant by the collar of his uniform and threatening him, because he has a strong dislike for raw peppers after he got sick as a child after eating some. The only thing that stopped the servant from getting sucked punched was Judith’s interception of the whole thing.

People refer to them as ‘The Terrors’ because personality wise, they’re basically copy and paste of Callisto’s more brutal tendencies. (Reynold was the one that started referring to them as that, however he means it in a playful and teasing manner, he loves the two gremlins to death).

Literally the karma of shitty people, because despite all of this, the twins only go after the bad and questionable ones.

The two of them aren’t mean, in fact they’re very nice, kind and playful once you get to know them. A good example of the people present on Eden and Dante’s hit list are the ones exactly like Gloria Kellen and her fetch dogs, aka the bullies.

The twins are the equivalent of ‘the hot cheeto girls’ when it comes to defending someone from bullies.

Out of the two, Dante is the more volatile one. He’s the one that picks fights the most out of the five Regulus siblings. The altercations are usually put to rest by Kayden, and when his older brother isn’t there to stop him, Judy will try to placate Dante.

Dante is very irritable when it comes to people he doesn’t like, and won’t hesitate to call someone out on their bs.

He gravitates more towards swordsmanship, and has a collection of all kinds of swords, which are his pride and joy. Some of them he forged himself overtime with the help of his father; you can find any type of sword you can think of in that collection, from normal ones to magical and very powerful ones, to ancient sword relics.

Dante combines magic and swordsmanship, and has this one special attack of ‘flying swords,’ it helps that some of his swords are somewhat sentient thanks to the magic he imbedded into them with Penelope’s help.

Oftentimes he can be found training with Kayden and Callisto, who teaches them everything he knows.

On the other hand, Eden is the more ‘docile’ of the two. People usually would rather deal with Eden than with Dante because they deem her more well-mannered, when in reality they should watch out when it comes to her.

Eden is actually more of a ‘behind the scenes’ kind of girl. Cross her and she’ll dig up any and every information on you in under an hour. Give her 20-40 minutes and she’ll have your entire life’s events at hand.

She’s the blackmail girly, and has her own special ways of making people talk when she needs/wants something, ways that actually don’t include any sort of harm, at least not physical.

Eden is in fact, a telepath, who also makes use of telekinesis. I’m talking about literally eradicating trees and yeeting them at someone if she’s testy enough, all of that without breaking a sweat. She could be sipping tea while controlling random objects to do all the work for her.

All of the Regulus kids have an inkling for music, and each has their own designated instrument. Judith plays the piano; Kayden has his cello; for his brash nature, no one would expect Dante of all people to play the violin, but he does, and he’s pretty much a prodigy when it comes to that; Eden has her beloved harp and lyre; Rigel plays the flute, and later on, he also picks up on how to play the guitar.

Speaking of talents and hobbies, Eden can be found very often in the kitchens trying out some of her recipes. The kitchen staff are some of her favorite people.

The Head Chef is always the first who tries her dishes, (yes he’s the test subject), this man has went through food poisoning because of little Eden’s very dubious deserts, yet he’s still the first who offers to try out her weird concoctions. He’s pleased to see her improvement as she grows, the Head Chef is basically an adoptive uncle at this point.

Judith and Callisto are the ones who get the finished, improved and actually edible result to try out firsthand. They have no idea Eden gave the Head Chef food poisoning a few times, and are giddy with the fact that they are the first to try her dishes, ignorance is bliss after all and Eden couldn’t agree more, she doesn’t have the heart to tell them the truth.

Penelope knows of this and has tried quite a few times to coerce the Head Chef out of his ‘test subject’ occupation, however he insisted on it, and Penelope settled on designating a special doctor for the poor man. However, she does find amusing Callisto’s and Judith’s giddiness whenever they boast about being the first to get to try Eden’s food.

[rewritingcanon]

victoire weasley headcannons NOW pleaseee

YAS THE ONLY GIRL EVER!!!!

looks almost the exact same as her mum and has her mum’s personality (with a little bit of bill fused into her)

she has the oldest daughter mentality where she always needs to be StressedTM over something. even when she has nothing going on in life she will create an issue to be worried over. when she was younger this was hard for her to emotionally handle but she has gotten better at pretending she is sane over the years

this also led her to do med school. idk healer vic is something so personal for me. idk what exactly she’d be doing but i know it would be in the big buck areas. a dermatologist or a optometrist or a surgeon or something. she’s smart as hell.

very particular about presenting a good image for her family. she was the oldest weasley in the new generation and so she knew she had to present herself in a certain way, and she never thought she minded until she was suddenly 18 and having an identity crisis

furthermore, the rita skeeter incident with her and teddy nearly killed her. shes been through some traumatic shit but that was crossing the line

gets into so many fights with dominique because both of them are polar opposites and are jealous of each other for completely different reasons. dominique wishes she can fit into the mould like victoire so easily does, victoire wishes she could be as free and uncaring as dominique is. both don’t understand each other

HOWEVER victoire and dominique are the ultimate soulmates. it doesn’t matter how much they fight, they’re very close. dominique rants to her and sends her memes victoire can’t understand and victoire will still pay for dom’s meals when theyre out bcuz it doesn’t matter how old dominique is, she is still her little sister. and victoire retains every last piece of dom’s friendship group drama, and stalks them all on social media silently judging the shit out of them

no seriously victoire and dominique are The Siblings like the most important relationship in each others lives i could write essays on my hcs for their dynamic. ask me about headcanons for them specifically and i will go into LOTS of detail

anyways. victoire loves journalling in sparkly ink from wizard smiggle. is the type to write “heart diseases” in glittery pink aesthetic cursive.

she absolutely rocked the 2010s. probably had a minecraft streaming channel with teddy.

i have also made a huge amount of tedoire headcanons here so i will keep this post relatively free of them hehe

every song MARINA ever sings is about victoire tbh

she’s a ravenclaw to me, which made her a little insecure because everyone sort of assumed weasley = gryffindor, so she had to change her brand a little bit and establish herself as a delacour so people would lay off her. it helps that shes as insanely pretty as her mother

sucks ass at quidditch but no one will ever know because she graciously avoided flying at all costs (she can do enough to pass the compulsory flying classes but that is IT)

loves legally blond the movie

cosplays as annabeth chase for every fucking halloween party because she literally only has one costume and refuses to buy more

bisexual but she didnt know until she started dating teddy and liked them just as much when they would metamorph into a girl. then she started connecting all the dots… that one traumatising breakup with that friend who ditched her for their bf…. how all her fav songs are wlw songs… why she likes gina gershon from bound so much…

dressed like gwen stacy in the amazing spiderman movies. long socks. polished black high heels with straps. brown woollen vests and cream coloured shirts with frills. pink lip gloss. ALWAYS in headband season. very fem academia.

very outwardly polite and nice to other people but always retains a sense of distance. she wants to be close to people but she doesn’t know how to build those connections— she’s very scared of being hurt or betrayed so she sticks with people she’s already known before her walls went up.

used to be a little dictator when her, dom, and louis played games around shell cottage. she would make all the rules and be very strict about following it all. dom and louis were useless at games without her, because they couldnt make rules where there were stakes and it wasn’t fun without them. yknow, older sibling shenanigans.

pretended to be supportive but cried for three hours silently in her dorm when both dom and louis and ALL OF HER COUSINS were sorted into NOT ravenclaw

always mained princess peach in mario bros games and would get genuinely pissed when someone took her instead

reads booktok books… sorry… shes a STEM girlie…

secretly has a big appetite towards meat.. definitely not inherited from her dad… definitely not haha (she went vegetarian for nine months to try and stop herself and it literally almost killed her she was hangry all the time)

can speak french fluently and better than her siblings can

has like five beauxbatons penpals excluding the maternal cousins

this isn’t even all of them but i will leave her here for now. i LOVE VICTOIRE so so so much dawg..

[nova-dracomon]

Me, Myself and I: When I’m you, but also me

Or, what it's like to be a your own dragon, but also literally intertwined with two other dragons as a single dragon

So we are a system of five dragons with three of our members collectively identifying as a hydra linktype, but each of them also has an individual form outside of that. As a hydra, we feel like we ride a weird line between what it means to be an individual and what is the self. We’re writing this to share what our daily life is like because we thought others might find it interesting! There’s not that many hydras around in the alterhuman community that we’ve seen at least.

We are a single dragon – we share a single body even in the headspace and are connected in a way we don’t share with other headmates. However, it gets extra fucky because we aren’t always together like that nor are we always all present in it when combined. Sometimes only two of the three hydra members combine at a time to be a hydra – it’s not necessary to have all three. Because of the shifting make-up of members, the appearance of our hydra form–the number of limbs, wing arrangement, and size also changes. Generally speaking, we'll be the size of whoever the largest dragon in the group is at the time. The one constant is that we always have gold scales.

Does Identifying as a Hydra Mean I Must be Plural?

How do you know when you’re a hydra then?

How do we know when we’re an individual dragon vs a single unit as a hydra? The easiest way to tell is because we’ll look like a hydra in our headspace. When someone isn’t in hydra form they’ll appear as their individual form. We can “tune in” to another headmate’s frequency and get a glimpse at what they’re doing/where they are from the front. It’s like adjusting the dial on a radio and can happen as quickly as if you glanced over at a mirror. Beyond essentially looking down at ourselves to check, we can often just feel it. The usual scenario is we feel like we’re in hydra form and we quickly check-in to confirm.

What does “just feel it” mean? It can mean feeling the phantom sensation of another neck alongside our body’s physical one. It can also mean feeling like our thoughts/feelings are “fuller” and we’re experiencing the thoughts of another fellow hydra head running parallel to our own. Another common occurrence is we can feel closeness, a unique lack of boundary, between what is me and us. 

Something we’ve been asked is who is controlling the body then? Do certain heads control different parts? How do we decide when we are moving around the headspace or collectively fronting? When we’re a hydra we’re not three dragons that have been glued together we are a single dragon. We all collectively control everything. As long as we have a shared intent, our body will move accordingly. And if we disagree? It definitely happens, but communication barriers are basically nonexistent. We feel each other’s thoughts and feelings as instantaneously as our own. It’s unusual to be frozen in indecision, it’s more like hesitating before making a choice. Talking things through just happens so quickly.

To share a mind

The thoughtleak is real. Thoughtleak happens between all of our headmates, usually when we’re close to each other in the headspace, but when in hydra form it’s more intimate. There’s definitely been times where we’ll suddenly feel an out-of-place emotion and have to consider who it belongs to. Which, that can happen with our other headmates, but it’s a stronger, more pressing feeling and harder to distinguish as someone else’s since hydra. When we’re not in hydra form, the rules seem to be the same as our non-hydra headmates: thoughtleak amount depends on proximity. It’s not possible for us to be both a hydra and in individual forms at the same time. It’s one or the other. Likewise, shifting between them doesn’t leave us in a limbo state. There can be a general knowing or sense that the form is going to shift soon before it does, but the actual change in form happens quickly.

Also, our other headmates are not able to just hop in and suddenly decide to join us as a hydra. There’s not a great way to explain it besides we’re able to do it because we’re drift-compatible. It’s just not possible unless we’re on the same wavelength.

Choice is punk and being an otherlinker is not only valid, but actually extremely cool.

The things you choose for yourself are powerful and we choose to describe our hydra-self as a linktype. This may or may not seem odd given everything we’ve said up to this point, but we have a specific reason for it. Everything: merging, being close to one another and sharing with each other is a choice. The linktype descriptor immediately communicates to others that we are collectively choosing to become another, different dragon together.

Nothing happens against someone else’s will. It’s impossible to Voltron into a hydra if we’re not comfortable with it. Forming together as a hydra is contingent on us not only on us being in tune with one another, but actively desiring to be close to one another. You gotta be drift-compatible and be willing to get into the robot. 

If you're interested hearing more of our rambles on being a hydra check out our older writing A Few Thoughts on Being a Hydra.

Parting Thoughts

We want to finish with a quote from Thorn. It was said in response to our 30 day alterhuman challenge, but we feel sums everything up nicely:

"We have a strong bond that has grown stronger over time. There’s a quote saved on our phone that I want to paraphrase: 'Right now, they feel like they’re in a box–like the menial distance between them is some forced, unnatural barrier that shouldn’t be there. Right now, they want to tear that barrier down.’ Being a dragon inherently comes with a feeling of power and pride, but being a hydra is about love and connection. We often joke that the only thing we love more than ourselves is each other. We’re close with our other headmates, but there’s something about becoming the same being as one another. A unique level of synchronicity and trust is needed for it. I love them.” – Thorn

[sighs-deeply-and-dreadfully]

Lol, I can’t help but imagine how Wally would react to a gothic, kind of grungy, reader. Just someone who wears black and white all the time, maybe with hits of darker blues or reds. I just find the idea amusing since the neighborhood and characters are all bright, fun colors while there’s just this one gothic person wearing spikes or something.

 

Also, something I can picture is Wally painting them because they’re so different from everything else and the uniqueness of their style and makeup is so fun to draw and paint, and the reader feels the same way. I can just picture the two of them drawing each other or something.

(romantic or mutual crushes, please ^^ I've always been a sucker for opposite aesthetic couples)

HAHA!!! I’m also a sucker for opposite aesthetic couples HEHEHE… I’ll strike you a deal; I’ll write both (mutual crushes and romantic)! HAHA

The Raven and The Kingfisher

Wally Darling x GN!Goth/Grunge!Reader

Headcanons Format, Mutual Crushes -> Romantic Relationship

When you first moved in, to say Wally was interested would be an understatement.

He adored your style, he found it very!! Refreshing? He loves all his neighbours and he loves their town, but sometimes something new can be appreciated!! And you were something new, alright!! /pos

After just a few days of talking, he ended up asking if he could paint you— and he loves to paint all his neighbours! But he certainly wanted to give a shot at conveying your style.

All those darker coloured paints (ones that maybe only been slightly used to create new tones) could finally be used >:]

If you were to say no, he’d accept ! That’s alright ! But he’d probably still likely doodle something of your style in private— although not necessarily of you.

If you say yes? He’s over the moon.

He takes great care to make his paintings as accurate as he can!! He’d likely be on yours for a while, just because you introduce a lot of new colours he hasn’t worked with before— the closest reference he has had is Frank and the other things he’s doodled— so it might take a while longer than usual!! But it’s so delightfully fun to experiment and learn.

But the outcome is lovely, and he proudly hands the painting off to you.

He doesn’t make that the last time he’s drawn you, though, goodness no. It almost becomes a habit, to doodle you.

Which his friends begin to notice, when the litte sketchbook he drags around is practically filled with scribbles of you.

At some point, he is with Julie! She ends up glancing over, and giggles at seeing him doodle you yet again, with a soft “Oh, Wally..”

The two had just been sitting around lightly chatting and doing their own things— and Wally was drawing.

Confusedly, Wally would lift his head— what was funny? Had he done something funny with meaning to—?

“You’re drawing the new neighbour!”

He tilts his head. Why yes, he was? How is that funny—? Julie picks up and continues, though.

“You’ve been drawing them sooo mucchhh.. Do you like them, or something? I think you might like them— we all kinda do!“

He tilts his head again. “Of course.. I like them, they’re my friend..?”

But that interaction gets his brain spinning, and eventually— during a hangout with Frank— he just kind of. Pauses.

He mutters under his breathe, and soon whisks himself away with a rushed farewell to Frank— who is just left staring in confusion.

Ah, so maybe like is a loose term. Haha ooooops..

When he steps into Home, who creaks him a hello, the amount he’s been doodling you somewhat- hits him like a truck?

You’re in his sketchbooks, mainly, which— all of his friends were! But his sketchbooks were almost like a direct thread to his “subconscious”. He just doodles whatever comes to mind, or whatever he feels (and his true feelings have a tendency to alter how it presents itself— though really only in ways he can understand). He uses it very much as an outlet.

And you were, basically, on every single damn page of the thing.

.. whoopsie.

With the newfound knowledge that he, haha, maybe has developed a “teensy weensy itsy bitsy” crush—

Heee is now terrified to be around you.

If it was so obvious to everyone else, was it obvious to you?

Wuh-oh.

He doesn’t let this anxiety stop him from talking to you, though. The thoughts of it made him sad— and the thought of him withdrawing making you sad made him ever sadder.

But from beyond this point, he’s a lot.. less collected.

When you two hang out, there’s a small shift in the air— that he is hyper-aware of, and you might be, too.

Wally always did stare— he liked eye contact, and he didn’t really care to learn where else he should be looking during conversations—

So him avoiding your gaze was almost off-putting due to how foreign it was.

He’d glance to his hands, or to his supplies, or To the sky.

Anywhere but you when you looked at him— he couldn’t!! Really bare your reaction!!

He knew it’d be the same way you look at him all of the time, but the thought it might be negative made him.. antsy.

Because, again, if his little crush was obvious to everyone else before it was even obvious to him— was it obvious to you, too?

This keeps up for a few days, and eventually— you just.. ask him what’s been up. You note his change in behaviour, and you express you’re confused— maybe even a bit concerned.

And the dam just comes flooding.

He gives some garbled twist of a confession, nervously wringing his fingers the entire time (something he almost never did).

He expresses it’s okay if it isn’t mutual, and that he just had to get it off his chest before he “exploded” (Barnaby used that word a lot in his jokes— so maybe it’d be funny if he used it, too?)

He’s overjoyed to hear you return the affections though, and immediately just sort of de-tenses and instead starts.. kicking his legs. Very quickly. Stimming. Hehe.

From there, you two fall into a relationship. You had already sort of been recognized as a “thing” by everyone else in the neighbourhood— as you were often seen together.

Now, you were practically always seen together— making the opposites in your aesthetic very noticeable. Two halves of a pair!

When you aren’t together, Wally has a tendency to.. maaaybe.. gush about you, a lil..

Specifically to Barnaby! He knows Barnaby doesn’t mind to listen (especially while consuming his.. “lovely” hot dogs (/sar)).

While the two stand around, Wally cupping his normal hotdog in two hands and Barnaby chewing on his abomination lovely creation, he’ll just go onnn and ooonn about you, or what the two of you have been up to, or what you plan to do later. His words are kinda hummed as he does, and he seems to idly be wiggling his head side to side.

Barnaby is happy to lend an ear! He’s got two very big ones, after all.

.. plus, it’s easier to lull Wally into kind of just.. handing his hotdog to him.. hehe..

Not that he wasn’t going to already give it! He just gets to receive it faster, and Wally pays no mind.

Overall, that little man is head over heels for you— absolutely smitten. He finds your aesthetic very, very pretty— and you in turn just as much.

Expect sappy love letters and even more paintings of you, dear. :]

I FORGOT TO DO AN AUTHOR’S NOTE AT THE END IM SORROY I GOT DISTRACTED HWAHWA

THis was super cute to write and I hope it was satisfactory!!! :D

Have a lovely day!!!!!

[typellblog]

Nisemonogatari - An Analysis

Being a siscon really did not help with this one.

With Kizu I could somewhat pretend that it was its own isolated arc despite the absurd length, but as the cast ever-expands it becomes more and more difficult to act as though I’m only writing about one character at a time here. 

Indeed, we even have mini-scenes for each of our previous heroines. These are deeply oriented around fanservice, albeit in a way that actually also contributes to the characterisation of everyone spotlighted here. (Not that I can say the same for those involving his sisters, later.)

Hitagi gets to indulge her most sadistic impulses in a way I don’t think we ever see again beyond this point, Kaiki serving as both catalyst for her kidnapping Koyomi and catalyst for her changing in a more substantial way in the future. 

The mystery of Hachikuji continuing to hang around is once again raised, along with ominous foreshadowing of what this might mean for her future. She starts to emerge as a surprisingly mature character, her gags more obviously deliberate, her advice surprisingly helpful.

Nadeko is given a chance to pursue her one-sided crush on Koyomi. Her techniques are childish but reveal a surprising amount of . . . cunning? Malice? Foreshadowing for her later arcs. In any case, Koyomi remains completely oblivious.

I think the most interesting part of Kanbaru’s scene here is an indication that she’s not as much of a pervert as she presents herself to Koyomi as, and indeed to Koyomi is the operative term here, because as we hear from Hanekawa when Koyomi tries doing impressions of his friends (great scene, shame it was cut in the anime), Koyomi might have quite a different impression of Kanbaru than others do. 

Speaking of Hanekawa, she’s the only one that seems to be actually folded into the main plot this time, but simultaneously she feels like she’s growing more distant. She doesn’t get a directly horny treatment like the other characters, instead focusing on a gag about giving Koyomi permission to touch her boobs, but if he ever uses it she’ll hate him forever. Notably it establishes a completely different dynamic to her totally accepting attitude in Kizumonogatari.

Her character growth is significant, putting aside the stereotypical class president look in favour of a more ‘normal’ one, arguably something she’s wanted to do for a while. She had a sort of . . . lack of self-awareness of her own abnormality, before. Her role here is as a positive role model, I guess, for the entire set of Araragi siblings. If they’re fakes, she’s the real deal. If they need to be aware of their own weakness and inferiority, she needs to become conscious of her own strength. 

This, of course, doesn’t really make sense until we take a proper look at our arc character.

Karen Bee

To be blunt I struggle to bring myself to like Karen. She feels fake to me. 

I find myself in a similar position to Koyomi in some ways, the mentions of his sisters peppered into the Kizumonogatari novel triggering my own weird sense of jealousy/inferiority.

In theory, I should like Karen. She resembles nobody more closely than Emiya Shirou, probably my favourite protagonist of all time. Although, to avoid the risk of derailing into another Fate/Stay Night essay, I’ll make a different comparison. Someone who himself gets compared to Emiya Shirou all the time. 

Koyomi Araragi.

How come I’m able to get invested into this guy’s story, his justice, his self-sacrificing nature, his stupid, corny, but sometimes really cool lines, and not do the same for his sister?

I think on one level the answer is simple - I’ve spent the past four books inhabiting his perspective. I don’t have any context, for Karen. Who is she trying to save, and why? What difficult decisions does she have to make along the way? The Fire Sisters’ escapades are treated as a gag, occasional mentions of them playing Russian roulette with the Mafia or getting into brawls with the police, but nothing solid. Karen’s trying to save the middle schoolers getting scammed by Kaiki, but I don’t care about them. I’m not given any reason to. 

That’s just a matter of perspective, though. I don’t find it a particularly convincing argument, when Koyomi tells her that her justice is fake because she only acts on the behalf of others. Is that desire itself not beautiful? If you saw the same people suffering that she did, would you not want to help them, too?

I haven’t been shown any of those people, though. So I don’t get it. 

But I’m wasting time with this. I can’t see these people, won’t see them, because I’m living in a different world from Karen. She’s still in middle school, and Koyomi is in high school. This is explicitly called out as being a point of change for him, one where he first began to close himself off to others on account of his self-worth evaporating as he realised the world was more difficult than he had thought. 

Karen and Tsukihi don’t have that, yet. They’re missing the key element that’s driven Koyomi’s whole character progression over these previous four books - the fact that he doesn’t have any friends. Lol. 

But I mean seriously, you see how the problems Koyomi is faced with operate on a completely different level than those the Fire Sisters try to deal with? They have an idea of a clear and simple evil, one that they’ll go to any ends to defeat. 

In comparison - Koyomi isn’t fighting villains. He tries to help the victims of oddities, but they can only save themselves, or so we’re told, making Koyomi seem useless when it comes to the big action scenes. What he struggles to overcome is his vision of himself as a burden, someone whose helpfulness is an unwanted favour and selfishness is a destructive, vampiric urge.

Karen and Tsukihi never once consider the possibility of themselves being burdens. They go off to help people heedless of the potentially destructive consequences (which inevitably seem to result). 

Karen’s ‘acting only on the behalf of others’ is fake to Koyomi because he’s already come to terms with his own selfishness. He couldn’t help Kiss-Shot, couldn’t do what she requested, because her request was to die, and he wanted her to live. The Fire Sisters haven’t yet been faced with such a difficult problem, haven’t yet been asked whether their self-sacrifice is really just self-satisfaction. Koyomi is scared of hurting people. All the time. He makes his decisions with that possibility in mind. That’s something he’s just had to accept. The Fire Sisters don’t seem to worry about that at all. 

When Koyomi tells Karen that before being right, she must be strong, we initially assume he’s talking about physical strength - the ability to defeat one’s enemies. But looking over Koyomi’s past actions, we’ve seen physical strength prove of little use to him time and time again. What he means is the strength of will to not falter in the face of opposition or difficult choices. He may not have been right, when he chose to keep Kiss-Shot alive. But at least he had the balls to do it.

Hanekawa points out he’s really criticising himself with this one. After all, there are plenty of times where he’s failed to show strength, like his struggle to let the second snake go in Nadeko’s case. He couldn’t commit to one course of action or another and risked getting the worst of both worlds. Hanekawa, in contrast, always commits to the bit, never giving away in the slightest that she had feelings for Koyomi after he started dating Hitagi. She’s almost too strong, that was her problem according to Oshino, and indeed in doing so she ended up hurting herself as much as she helped other people.

She has to be aware of her own strength, not act as though everything she’s doing is perfectly normal, hold off on dragging everyone with her directly to the right answer.

In the same way that Koyomi has to be aware of his own weakness, to know he can’t solve everything on his own, and not be afraid to ask for help. 

In the same way that Karen hasn’t quite internalized it, that evil and good aren’t always so obvious, that you need to be ready for getting your ass kicked, and maybe you should have asked a couple of people to come with you.

When Koyomi and Karen fight, he gets the shit beaten out of him, but he still clearly wins. Karen struggles to articulate her viewpoint when faced with an actual objection, and eventually gives in, reassured by Koyomi that he never thought what she was doing was wrong.

Hmmm. I notice that I haven’t discussed Karen’s associated oddity yet, the bee. Interestingly enough, it’s just not that important to her arc. It doesn’t influence her personality or behaviour at all, like many of the other characters’ oddities. It just makes her sick. 

Oshino’s old adage proves true to an extent - the bee does appear for a reason, in the sense that Koyomi says it's her own damn fault, for going up against Kaiki alone. She gets what she deserves! A bit harsh, perhaps. It’s also her own fault in the sense that her overactive imagination is part of what stimulates its effects so much - the bee is a fake oddity, clinging to a fake person, someone who plays make-believe in such a way that they’re susceptible to a fake disease. 

Obviously the fire association with the bee makes sense for her, especially in regard to how it becomes a fever, getting heated up because of justice leads to her pushing herself too hard and burning out. Blah blah blah whatever. The symbolism doesn’t interest me, because I think the far more important thing about the bee is that it’s not representative of a larger problem. Karen acts fairly similarly before and after being afflicted. She isn’t saved by anyone else, but you’d have to stretch to say she saved herself, either. Unlike Koyomi, she has friends. Unlike Hitagi, she doesn’t have difficulty reaching out to others. Unlike Kanbaru, she doesn’t have a hidden side to her, a wish that she can’t fulfill.

I said it already, but the Fire Sisters don’t have regrets. They don’t have any lingering trauma. They’re the ones causing problems for other people, supremely confident in their own righteousness. They may be fakes, but in a sense they’re a lot more real than the rest of the cast.

Tsukihi Phoenix

Well, at least that’s the case for Karen, whose outside image and inside personality are perfectly aligned. For Tsukihi, on the other hand, there’s a bit of a disjunction. 

Alright, I guess we’re doing Tsukihi too. I wasn’t exactly planning on both at once when I started this, but I suppose at this rate I have enough room.

What, I haven’t talked about Kaiki yet? God, who cares. What do you want me to say, here. He’s a fake that’s accepted his fakeness in the same way Koyomi asks of Karen. A withered branch to Koyomi’s sapling, the third stage in the Araragi evolutionary tree. I don’t quite get it, how exactly this man is supposed to be Koyomi taken to his logical extent. He’s evil, but in a very deliberate way. He’s not convinced of his own justice, has no interest in promoting his position. He almost feels like he’s playing a character. I’ll get back to him in later arcs, but for now I think the important thing to note is something I mentioned last time - as a male character, his role is more about mirroring Koyomi than being someone Koyomi ought to forge a connection with. As an adult specialist, his arc is complete, so to speak. There’s nothing in him to change or that needs changing.

He’s the polar opposite of the Fire Sisters in that way. They’re too young to have changed yet, not quite mired in the coming-of-age plotline that ensnares this story’s main characters. Kaiki isn’t an arc character, doesn’t need to be won over by Koyomi, but neither does Karen, really. 

Koyomi already has a deep enough relationship with his sisters - just look at their openings, the lyrics addressed to a vague listener that’s almost him but feels far too idealised, his image cropping up again and again in their visuals. In Platinum Disco, he overshadows Tsukihi from the background, closing his mouth over her and forcing her to dance headlessly. His influence over her is obvious, almost total. In Marshmallow Justice, he’s buffeted around by the currents of Karen’s flames, speaking to a more antagonistic relationship, her trying to insist on her righteousness to him.

This is an established, regular part of their dynamic. If anything, the biggest change to their relationship doesn’t happen in the arc where Karen is afflicted by an oddity, it’s the toothbrush scene at the start of Tsukihi Phoenix. (Which still baffles me in a lot of ways, but I really don’t want to get bogged down in it right now).

I said it already, but Karen’s oddity doesn’t really represent any deep-rooted psychological issues for her - it’s fake.

Unlike Karen, however, Tsukihi’s oddity is of immense significance to her. Not just in terms of its importance to this arc, but all the way down to its influence on her personality and behaviours. After all, Tsukihi herself is the oddity.

The Shide no Tori, an immortal oddity that adapts to its surroundings. It’s volatile, mercurial, constantly renewing itself. It’s also eternal. The core of the thing is that it has no core, no consistent personality, and as such must take cues from those around it. Tsukihi acts according to her whims, but in the end remains incredibly dependent on others, latching onto them to give her a purpose. 

Her justice is fake in the sense that it’s been picked up from Karen and Koyomi. It’s not at the core of her being. 

She doesn’t have the same drive for it that Karen does, and as such tends to follow her sister’s initiative.

But, similarly to Koyomi, she does have the ability to regenerate from fatal danger. Just as he would throw himself into danger to help his friends even without it, she’s said to have thrown herself off a building to help Karen without even knowing she has the ability.

In comparison to Koyomi’s selfish, half-assed vampirism, a healing ability that has him straddling life and death without really making progress in any fight, Tsukihi’s immortality is pure. Instant. Perfect. There are no consequences. 

There are no consequences. She doesn’t regret because she isn’t given anything to regret. Learning about the supernatural would threaten the Shide no Tori’s position as a normal human, so the memories of being killed are wiped from her mind when she wakes up.

Of course she would throw herself into danger to save someone else. She doesn’t really have a ‘self’ to value in the first place. Everything important to her comes from other people. Koyomi faces immense self-loathing for a similar reason. Tsukihi doesn’t seem to be bothered by it, though. Perhaps she can’t be.

She knows her sense of justice is a bit different from her siblings, and she considers the possibility of the Fire Sisters breaking up. The possibility of Karen changing when she reaches highschool, in the same way Koyomi did. The implication being that Tsukihi would not, floating from hobby to hobby without ever forming a permanent attachment to anyone, constantly reinventing herself like a phoenix rising from the flames. 

That’s the Shide no Tori. A clever fake that keeps itself from being noticed by imitating a normal human. Kaiki might say that a deliberate fake may have more value than the original, but even the deliberateness of it is carefully removed, not allowing the host awareness of anything related to their condition. 

In that sense she’s not any more or less human than her siblings. 

That is, I suppose, the main conflict of this arc. It’s centered on Tsukihi but doesn’t involve her - how can it, when her entire gimmick involves being unaware of what’s going on around her?

Koyomi is opposed by the exorcist sisters Ononoki and Kagenui. Just as Kaiki mirrors Koyomi, they mirror the Fire Sisters. The older, physically inclined, human. The younger, an oddity. And they claim to be defenders of justice.

This is the tricky part about justice, which Koyomi has been trying to impart to Karen. Most people think their actions are justified. Someone like Kaiki is an absurd exception. How can you insist on being right when your opponents also claim they’re on the side of justice? We’re not getting a good answer to that in this book. 

Perhaps I’m starting to understand a little how Koyomi is like Kaiki, here. Because he doesn’t claim to be on the side of justice. He never even tries. He gives up that battle before it starts. He’s not on the side of humans. He’s not on the side of oddities. Like the time with Kiss-Shot, he’s nothing more or less than on the side of the person he chooses to protect. 

Little sisters are more important than justice. A sentiment I can get behind.

In any case, there’s something a little bit off about Kagenui here. Part of her motivation is hoping to meet Oshino and in his absence she takes on a little of his role - viewing Koyomi as a human, rather than a monster. 

Something must have set her off, Koyomi thinks, when she starts talking about him forcing his ideals on others. He might be fine with leaving Tsukihi alone, but what would Karen think? His parents? Tsukihi herself? Wouldn’t she become a real problem if she was aware of her true nature as an oddity?

He responds by saying he’s allowed to force things on his family. Once again, he’s okay with being a bit selfish, a bit of a burden. Koyomi’s sisters aren’t like the other girls he meets throughout the series. He doesn’t need to win them over, doesn’t need to break down the barriers between them and come to a complete understanding - he already does understand them.

Tsukihi being an oddity prompts realizations on his part, but nothing he didn’t already know. He already understands and accepts the entirety of her, in the same way they do for him. So he doesn’t need to worry about forcing something that can’t ever be repaid on her. He’d accept the same for her. They would, all three of them, happily die for each other, and they know it.

Something must have set Kagenui off, talking about this topic, and it seems to relate to her relationship with Ononoki. Are they real sisters, or fakes? Wouldn’t it be a real problem if an immortal oddity was aware of her true nature and tried to practice justice regardless? Kagenui argues that Tsukihi would be cruel and arrogant in the pursuit of it, having been freed from the constraints of human reason. 

Koyomi thinks of the former Heart-Under-Blade, someone who was obscenely over-the-top and utterly inhuman. I think of Ononoki Yotsugi, quick to violence, quick to insults, saying she’d be fine if this entire world of fakes was destroyed.

Yep, Kagenui is definitely a bit off, here. Too concerned with matters we aren’t really privy to, at the moment. It’s like the fight with Karen all over again - Koyomi gets the shit kicked out of him, but in the end he’s still standing, and his opponent wavers a little. Finally learning “a lesson ten years in the making”. 

She talks about the inherent nature of humanity, the doctrine of innate evil. If we suppose that people are born evil, then any good act requires putting on a fake persona. Like Hanekawa and Koyomi talked about in Kizu, self-sacrifice vs self-satisfaction. They both think of themselves as faking it, only acting like they’re truly ‘good’, but according to Kagenui’s proposal, there’s no such thing as being truly good. The truest good is in trying to be good, a deliberate imitation. A fake that has more value than the original.

So, where does that leave us? One really has to wonder about Koyomi’s decision to not tell Tsukihi (or even Karen) anything about the supernatural. Another selfish decision, in the vein of what he did to Kiss-Shot. It’s in character, at least. 

I think it’s interesting how he describes it, after kissing her. There was a time where Koyomi was an only child. There was a time when he only had one sister. But for her entire life, there wasn’t a single moment where Tsukihi wasn’t the little sister of him and Karen. Nisemonogatari is about family, and family, for Tsukihi, is something that she can define herself in relation to. It’s a permanent attachment, created by the circumstances of her birth. Like a cuckoo, the Shide no Tori leaves its young in the nest of another family to prepare them for facing the world. Tsukihi isn’t ‘really’ from the Araragi family, in the same way that she doesn’t ‘really’ have a sense of justice like the other two. But in her deliberate attempt to adopt it- well, you know how it goes.

Koyomi doesn’t need to tell her about the supernatural, about the fact that she’s a phoenix, because in a meaningful sense she isn’t one. She’s his sister. She’s Karen’s sister. That’s good enough. 

Koyomi’s last lines are strangely poignant, contradicting the usual epilogue format by occurring before he’s woken by his sisters the next morning. “I got way more involved than usual, but there was no point in staying there forever. For now, I’ll go back to my room and change.”  I feel like it’s a comment on the blending of worlds that’s been going on here - he’s part of the backstage, as Hachikuji puts it. His sisters are at the front. He’s entering the adult world, while they’re still kids. There’s a sense that he shouldn’t get too involved in their incidents, and vice versa. 

A hopeful reading would be that like Koyomi, they’ll also change. In their own time, at their own pace, in their own way.

But that’s all for now. I managed to be somewhat normal about Tsukihi. Somehow. 

[24-guy]

3070 words later. I present to you...

What was the deal with the grill brush?

An amateur essay on “Just for Once” from Nerdy Prudes Must Die by J

When listening to the soundtrack for Nerdy Prudes Must Die (NPMD), I realized that the song that was hitting me most was, unexpectedly, Just for Once. This was odd to me because one could argue that, of all the songs in the musical, Just for Once isn’t that emotional of a song. Especially since it was sung by a side character like Ruth. But since this instance, every time I listened to it, I was struck with the desire to sit and properly delve into the lyrics and try to understand what exactly it was about it that made it so emotional to me. My aim in writing this is to understand how this song develops Ruth’s character further than her initial portrayal.

To do this, we need to take what we already know about Ruth and put it into context. Before this song happens, we have seen Ruth, as a character, in five of the nine songs, with Just for Once being the tenth song in the musical. This feels important to note as this is a significant amount of time to get to know Ruth and her character as well as her motivations and story through the musical.

Ruth is one of the two characters that open the musical. The first is a fellow nerd, Richie, who sings that he is dead. The stage is set in red lighting. When Ruth joins as a second voice to follow up his line, the context stays the same. We know from the first song of the musical that Ruth is going to die. As the performance continues, we go into a bigger piece with the students of Hatchetfield High School singing about how much school sucks. This doesn’t tell us much about her character, so let’s move on.

Literal monster is a song where the nerds of Hatchetfield High sing about their bully, Max Jägerman. Ruth’s part in this is telling us that she is a nerd and that she gets bullied. She has both solo and group lines that tell the audience and the listener that they aren’t enthusiastic about the bullying stopping. However, one of the lines in the part after the first chorus gives us our first hint into Ruth’s main character trait, she is extremely sexual.

The musical continues after this to see our main trio of nerds at a library. Peter, Richie and Ruth are working together on a thermodynamics paper. Here, we get another line that cements Ruth’s main trait being that she is extremely lonely, and that comes across in often uncomfortable moments. This scene we also get told that Ruth craves contact enough that she will talk telemarketers into hanging up the phone, and that she sees Peter getting a call from one as “lucky”. As the scene continues, we see that Ruth doesn’t seem to understand personal space and is nosey as she asks Peter about what Stephanie Lauter – a popular girl from school – is talking to him about. There is some minor things to note from this scene too, like how she references Star Wars and how she initially agrees that Peter shouldn’t get his hopes up about Stephanie because they’re too different in the social hierarchy in school.

Our next proper character moment happens when Ruth, Richie and Stephanie go to the boy’s bathroom to find Peter after he didn’t show up to study at a restaurant with Stephanie. Here, she remarks how the boys are lucky because they can all watch each other go to the toilet thanks to the urinals not having walls between them.

Our last major scene with Ruth and new traits to note, is during the set-up and consequence of a prank that the nerds, Stephanie and a girl called Grace play on their bully, Max. During the set-up we see that Ruth’s history of bullying leads her to lash out at Stephanie for calling them nerds, going into too much detail about her allergy to deodorant. It helps to solidify Ruth as someone who tends to make people uncomfortable with her lack of a vocal filter. In a later moment during the same setting, Ruth is talking to a telemarketer and gets hung up on. When Ruth talks about her nervousness about pulling off the prank, Stephanie comforts her. This leads to Ruth saying that Stephanie is nice, and that she might be in love with her. This helps us understand that Ruth probably doesn’t understand a lot of what she’s feeling, considering that earlier on she seemed almost negatively inclined towards Stephanie. In a moment between Richie and Peter, we get further confirmation that Ruth is “thirsty” all the time, and that it would be easy to sleep with her and then leave her because of it. When the prank goes wrong, with Max fighting against the perceived ghost and skeleton, we see that Ruth – in the skeleton costume – seems flattered and happy with the praise from Max.

So, to recap. In the lead up to Just for Once, we can understand that Ruth is an anxious character. She doesn’t think too highly of herself or her fellow nerds and will only really push for them to try to get ahead if someone else seems to be reaching out with them to support them. We know that she is touch starved enough that someone being kind and touching her shoulder is enough to make her think that she is in love with someone and that, because of this, she will take any human contact that she can – even if its salespeople on the phone.

With this foundation, we can now talk about how Just for Once expands our view of Ruth as a character.

In the opening before the song, we find that Ruth thinks she can perform on stage better than one of her classmates. This leads into our “musical in a musical” song that is a staple of StarKid shows. This song is supposed to be sung within the context of the musical “The Barbecue Monologues” that exists within the Hatchetfield universe, but I think it can do well at telling us a lot about Ruth’s character as she did decide to sing this song over any of the others that possibly exist within the rest of the production.

The first hint that the song means more to Ruth than immediately apparent is during the end of the second verse, where Ruth sings “And life is fine, if only it were mine.” While it may be because the character that she’s singing for is discontent with life, we have also seen that Ruth doesn’t really fit in outside of the nerd friend group she’s found herself in. We can speculate that she also feels like life isn’t hers to hold. She may feel like she would enjoy life, if only it was something that she could enjoy, seeing as for so long before this point in her story, she was being bullied.

Before this, she sings about how the character has “installed a new bay window” and that they were shopping “for shutters to obstruct the view”. I think that this implies that Ruth understands that having improvements to her life is something that she should want (after Max’s death, the bullying stops entirely), and that she can see the appeal of, but she still wants something to conceal the view of the outside, or even stop the outside from seeing who she is on the inside.

The chorus is the main tell that this song goes deeper than surface level to me. Ruth sings that “just for once I’d be the centre of attention, just for once, remember what a life could be, just for once I feel the light inside the burning of a candle, living just for once…” I’m going to take apart this chorus piece by piece to explain what I think each part means.

The opening line states, “just for once I’d be the centre of attention,” and this lines up with what we know already about Ruth’s character. She has demonstrated already that she craves attention and affection. We have seen her reaction to being praised for her performance as the skeleton in the prank to Max. Ruth wants to be loved, and to have her performance praised. She wants to be the lead of a play.

The next is “just for once, remember what a life could be” this feels like it’s reiterating my point where Ruth wants to remember what her life could mean if there was never any bullying that happened as it has warped her view of what life is. She now has a downplayed life where there’s no point in standing up to people because what’s the point if they all have more worth in your school than you do?

The second to last part is “just for once I’d feel the light inside the burning of a candle” and I think that this means that she wants to feel the light of the spotlight on her, that she wants to be in the spotlight. The way candles are always described is as calm, dancing flames. She wants to be like the flames on candles, to be seen as a delicate but bright focal point of the entire picture.

The final line of the chorus is “living just for once” and it is repeated halfway after the initial singing of it. This, again, just gives the impression that Ruth doesn’t think she was ever really living. She wants to live a good, happy life. But she can’t.

There is a line in the third verse that states “and I was not unhappy about the attention I ensnared, judge me”. This is referring to the character she’s singing for losing their hair after chemotherapy. It can also be read as Ruth not being unhappy about the attention she possibly got after the news of Richie’s death got around. After all, they were both nerds, and in a superficial school like Hatchetfield High even if they weren’t friends, she’d probably get some attention thanks to the apologies gained. This isn’t to say that she was happy, or even neutral, about Richie’s death. This is me pointing out that she would have gotten some of that attention she craved from the loss of her friend.

The following lines don’t stand out to me as anything personal as they start to feel more like the story that she’s singing about is getting across comes in. But the chorus changes again, so I’ll cover those lines too.

The first of these lines is “just for once my life could be just what I wanted”. Here it feels, again, like Ruth wants her life to be something specific, that she could just be better, and be more confident, popular, whatever.

The following is “just for once I’d feel the spark that I once knew”. This introduces another piece of information when it comes to Ruth’s character; she used to know what it felt like to be like this, to perform. She has felt that spark of being on stage, like she is while singing this, and she wants to feel that spark again.

The next is a similar line to one in the first, with a single word changed. “Just for once I’d feel the fight inside the burning of a candle”. This doesn’t change a lot about the implications of the line, but it does give the feeling that she feels like she could be ready to fight for wanting this. She wants this bad enough that, just for once, she’s ready to fight for it.

“Something more than I can handle” is the last line before we have a “just for once” and I feel like this calls again to her wanting to be in that spotlight. She wants to be in the spotlight, even if she knows that she can’t handle the pressure it puts her under for doing so. This marks a turning point in the song where the tone shifts, paralleling what Ruth may be going through with realizing she might not be ready to handle the pressure that being on stage could cause.

The first line of this section is “Should I flip the burgers now? Should I double check its well done on the outside not within?” This is filled with confusion about what she is doing. Ruth’s character has been placed to supervise something they don’t know what they’re looking for when it comes to checking it’s fine to flip the burgers. I believe this parallels Ruth’s hesitance and uncertainty when it comes to navigating a space like theatre, or high school, where she does know what to look for in theory. But in practice she falters, consumed by insecurity and self-doubt, potentially ruining her reputation/ ”burgers” if she does one thing wrong.

Breaking up the lines in this portion of the song are painful sounding “oh”s that sound like pleading to whoever is listening.

“Should I let the coals burn out? Should I let the years cook my body down in front of him?” Is the following line. And, again, this feels like a parallel between the character’s doubt about themselves and their health struggles with getting cancer at a reasonably early age, and Ruth’s doubts about her popularity and lack of connection, feeling like her life is over even though she’s only eighteen years old and her life is barely properly begun. She feels undesirable now, how is she going to feel when she’s older?

This next part of the song, while just repeating the line “Just for once”, has a portion of the music playing that is a leitmotif that has shown up in a lot of the songs before this point. Most noticeably, it takes centre stage first during the song “Cooler Than I Think I Am”. It plays over the top of a part of the chorus where Peter – the lead singer – sings the line “I’m not a loser”. This is brought up again during the titular song “Nerdy Prudes Must Die”, where Max is about to kill Richie, and Richie sings the line as a last-ditch effort to prove he’s no longer a loser, Max shouldn’t kill him. This musical idea is used as a point where the nerds are breaking out of their set place in Hatchetfield High’s social hierarchy. Richie uses it as a beg to be spared. The music behind Ruth’s vocals use it to foreshadow her demise at the end of this song thanks to the use of it in Richie’s number. It sets hope up and dread in the audience when they remember that Ruth was alongside Richie in the opening number singing about how they were dead.

The final part of the song doesn’t seem like it’s a part of the song from the in-universe musical at all. Ruth sings about how a family is borrowing her tap shoes. It’s melancholy in tone, and she continues, singing how it’s “no bother, I never ever use them”. And in a heart-wrenching moment, she says “I used to dance”, before repeating “I used to dance” like she’s about to cry.

I think that moment of the song is the most plain about Ruth’s feelings. I think she did used to dance, and that she did lend her tap shoes to someone because her anxiety stops her from performing anymore. This is a sad moment that lingers slightly before we return to spoken dialogue for the end.

“I found your grill brush, Maurie. It was right here, all along.” Right. The grill brush. This is one of the main reasons I wanted to write this in depth look at Just for Once, because I feel like the grill brush holds more meaning than it first appears. When it is first mentioned, the character of Maurie is looking for the grill brush and Ruth’s character gives a sarcastic comment about how they used it to brush their hair that morning. We know this is even more of a joke thanks to the later lines describing the chemotherapy. However, this ending says that the brush was there the whole time.

I think that the grill brush is symbolizing Ruth and her ability to perform. Given the initial response, it would make sense for the parallel to be how Ruth wants to perform but can’t because, well, she’s herself. She’s nerdy little Ruth who makes sexual remarks and Star Wars references and has anxiety so bad she quit dancing even in her free time. But, after this performance she does while the rest of the cast for The Barbeque Monologues are taking a break, she has more than enough ability to act on stage if the pressure isn’t there. She can do it. So why does she sound so sad when she says, “It was right here, all along…”? Because she knows that even if she can perform, she can’t do it with an audience thanks to her anxiety and self-doubt.

So where does this leave us with Ruth’s character after watching this performance? We now know that Ruth, despite initial appearances, is an aspiring actor with the ability to act but her anxiety is holding her back. She’s performed willingly on stage, but when she knows there is no audience to watch her perform. Even though she wants attention and to have the comfort of people seeing her, she still wants to have the ability of shutting everything out, letting herself be a secret because that’s what she’s used to.

Just for Once feels so sad because it’s an “I want” song that ends with the lead dying. The audience listens to her story, her wants and desires, and knows that she is going to die before the end of the musical because that is what we were told with the opening number. Just for Once is a song that Ruth sings to herself because she can let herself be selfish, and she can let herself want to be the centre of attention when she’s stood on stage alone with nobody to judge her.

Maybe if she survived, she would be able to gain the courage to handle the pressure she feels when she’s stood up on that stage.

[wannaeatramyeon]

Love your blog! 🥹 Can you write some general Gun and Goo headcannons? They’re such a fun duo I can’t- 🤠

Thank you for being so sweet anon and again sorry for the looong delay. Take this complete and utter word vom. I.. I don't really know what this is apart from a ramble presented in bullet points.

Gun Park + Goo Kim: Duo headcanons

Fuck, I love these two.

Let's start from the top.

Gun and Goo might not always get on, often behaving more like a bickering old married couple one step away from throttling each other, but they absolutely respect one another.

Begrudgingly so. Meeting someone that can go toe to toe with them does not happen every day.

Being secret friends or successor though, is completely out of the question. They never even considered it in the first place despite Gun ticking most of Goo's criteria and vice versa.

Both completely unhinged and chaotic in very different, often clashing, ways. Finding each other grating, fighting skills complementing each other due to circumstance rather than naturally.

Gun thinks of Goo as a disloyal, flighty and greedy maniac. Whereas Goo sees Gun as a dull stick-in-the-mud who only cares about fighting.

They're both right.

Gun doesn't care much for material goods. He will still buy the best of the best, because why the hell not. However, he does not form any sentimental attachment to it.

Goo is surprisingly similar. Often preferring shopping sprees as a form of a power trip and to show off how rich he is. There is a fleeting thrill of buying something he wants, but ultimately it gets discarded.

Stealing Gun's things, on the other hand, much more rewarding for Goo.

The first time he laid eyes on Gun wearing the striped yellow shirt and scarf combo, Goo knew he had to have it. Besides, it would look much nicer on him, dont you think? What the hell is Gun Park doing wearing such bright colours anyway.

In all honesty, Gun doesn't waste enough energy on clothing to say anything when he saw Goo in his outfit. Although he did roll his eyes and take an extra long drag of his cigarette.

(A/N: I love the idea of Goo stealing Gun's clothes. But I tend to flip flop between how private Gun is, keeping his work and personal life completely separate. )

If the outfit isn't stolen, then it would mean Goo went out and bought the exact same thing... Which is funnier if you think about it.

Because the sheer amount of effort that that takes, finding the same top, same scarf - because why the fuck would Gun tell him where he got it even if Goo did ask.

The fact that Goo takes a significant time out of his day just to fuck with Gun. Truly, what an idiot. Does he have nothing better to do?

Spending so much time together, they pick up naturally on each other's likes and dislikes. Well, Gun does anyway. Goo does most of the talking, and the few times Gun does talk - Goo doesn't even bother to listen.

Unfortunately, that means if someone asked Gun what happened on the latest episode of an anime series, he would be able to recite exactly what Goo has told him, and then afterwards beat them up for asking in the first place.

There's a closeness there that disgusts them both equally with how well they know each other. Music preferences, how they take their coffee. Knowing each other's mood like their own. Ugh.

Life carries on though and there's still shit to do. WIth most of their waking moments spent together, they weave in their own errands between jobs and missions.

At least Goo does. Gun's life is much more orderly instead of a whirlwind of chaos. He is proactive and reactive whereas it appears to him that Goo will just fulfil his own whims as they come up.

Either way, Goo is the one driving and it's his car so Gun has no choice but to go with.

Well. Gun can stay in the car like some sort of pitiful dog awaiting their master's return or join in with Goo.

He usually opts for the latter, and also regrets it too. For example, getting cookies together for fuck's sake. Grabbing ice cream. Ring shopping!

Really, don't let anyone tell you that Gun is impatient. He puts up with far too much from his blonde partner. He can be extremely level headed, often choosing to walk away from things not worth his time rather than waste his energy. There's a lot of hill where he would prefer not to die on where Goo Kim is concerned.

If you asked Goo what was the one thing he hated most about Gun, the ensuing silence would be the longest he has ever been quiet for. Because there really is so much he hates about that fucking guy.

Just one? Then Goo would likely say the smoking. Not only does it stink, but the smell seeps into the car interior and lingers on everything. Goo often likes to pretend he's choking when Gun lights up. Putting on a coughing fit and spraying spittle everywhere until Gun walks away in disgust.

If you asked Gun what he hated most about Goo Kim? Completely deadpan and straight faced, he would say 'everything'.

[stillness-in-green]

Chapter Thoughts — Chapter 391: Rejecting the World + Chapter 392: Villain Name

On Toga’s Accusations

I am somewhat wary that two-thirds of Toga’s accusations towards Ochaco—you’ve never wanted for anything; your life was perfectly easy to live—are worded in such a way that they’re very easily parried by a reminder that Ochaco grew up in poverty.[1]  No, Uraraka never struggled with quirk-based compulsions like Toga did; she always seemed to fit easily into her social surroundings; that doesn’t mean she’s never wanted for anything and has always had an easy life.  It feels extremely akin to the Spinner fanboys yelling at the Black dude that he has no idea what it’s like to be judged by his appearance; it makes the accusers look wildly self-centered, oblivious to hardships suffered by people other than themselves.

That said, Ochaco’s already done the thing where Toga expresses that she finds her life difficult and Ochaco responds by ignoring that statement completely in favor of moralistic scolding about actions having consequences.  One would hope, given the contents of these two chapters, that we’re not due for yet another speech of that sort.  At most, I’d like to see Ochaco use their shared difficulties—different in nature, but both still present—as a basis for empathy rather than an excuse to chide Toga for not trying harder.

A while back, I criticized the Flamin’ Sidekickers for feeling the need to justify their continued association with Endeavor to Dabi—as if their reasoning makes any difference to Todoroki Touya!—and I feel similarly about this. True as it is that Ochaco has faced her own share of problems, her firing back about those problems and comparing her and Toga’s responses to them would not actually be helpful right now in de-escalating the situation.  It’s not always about you and your own problems!  Especially not when you’re trying to talk someone down!  As was the case with the Spinner fanboys, Toga’s in a very bad place right now, and has been for a long, long time.  Ochaco doesn’t have to validate her crimes, but I do think it’s important to validate her pain.[2]

(Hit the jump for more on Toga—her flashback and the intersection of her emotions with her quirk mechanics—as well as some musings on the broader implications of the quirk counseling scene, and the usual assortment of odds and ends.)

   

On Toga’s Emotional Quirk Mechanics

O Nice to finally get a hard confirmation that the doubles are clones of Toga-as-Twice, not clones of Twice himself.  Makes sense, given the speed with which she’s replicating, and makes it slightly easier to justify her own emotional hang-ups interfering with the way Double normally functions, though I’m by no means rescinding my complaints about that whole thing being hella arbitrary. Also, confirming that these are all Togas would seem to make it less probable for Uraraka to be able to pick out the real thing by her tears, right?  If they’re all Toga-masquerading-as-Twice, shouldn’t they all be crying?

O I like the Zeno’s Arrow-esque nature of the problem with Toga’s time limit on her transformation here.  Like, yes, any given double, and Toga herself, will run out of transformation time eventually, but she’s making exponentially increasing numbers of doubles every single second; each one of those doubles is created with the same amount of blood stock its creator had at the moment it started the creation process.  Each double thus comes into existence with one second more time than its creator now has.  So, how thin can Toga slice those seconds?  How infinitesimally close to the timer reaching zero can a double still snap out a new copy, which now has that tiny fragment more time remaining to make a copy itself? Real life doesn’t operate on philosophical time, of course, so she’ll run out of time eventually, prompting a huge tidal wave of Twices turning back into Togas, but it’s a neat thought exercise.

O DELIGHTED that Tsuyu’s guess was off-base, so all the ice-cold, “Toga doesn’t really love the League,” take meta from the people who think the League are toxic and bad for each other is rendered just hilariously short-sighted in retrospect.  Because, hey, maybe you shouldn’t take Tsuyu’s word over Toga’s about Toga’s own feelings!  Imagine that!

O Interesting that, despite the whole horde moving with the feeling of, “All heroes must die!” when they overrun Tsuyu, they don’t kill her on the spot, but rather just bind her and hoist her up as a hostage.  I assume there’s at least some influence from Hori not wanting to kill off any student characters, but extra-canonical explanations being what they may be, it still reflects interestingly on Toga’s own desires and intentions, and certainly her (underutilized) affection for Tsuyu.

   

On Toga’s Flashback

O So like, Toga’s dad definitely hit her in the flashback, right?

His hand is outstretched, specifically visible against the black silhouette of the rest of his figure; he could have just slapped the bird out of her hands, but I don’t think that would have been enough to spin her all the way in the opposite direction from when her parents first discovered her with the bird.  Further, she’s on her knees and hunched over, one arm raised towards the left side of her face, and if you look closely at her cheek in the next panel—

              —you can see a mark on the left side of her face that isn’t there on the right.

I don’t have a particular observation about this to discuss further—just wanted to point it out.  Toga’s father’s first response to seeing his three-year-old daughter holding a dead bird was not to tell her to put the bird down, or to hit it out of her hands, but to slap her so hard it spun her around and knocked her over.  Oh, and then to accuse her of killing it.

The three-year old.  Killing a fully-grown sparrow with her bare hands.  I couldn’t kill a fully-grown sparrow with my bare hands because a fully grown sparrow wouldn’t let me in touching range without flying away!  What is wrong with Toga’s father, exactly, that that’s the assumption he jumps to??

Incidentally, one of the bright little changes the anime made to that sequence back in MVA—one I actually overlooked in the In Memoriam posts—was to specifically animate him slapping the bird out of her hands and then leave her standing there grinning, arms lowered, as her parents continue berating her.  It’s truly astounding that we are still uncovering new issues stemming from the anime’s butchering of My Villain Academia!

O Speaking of Toga material the anime wildly fucked up, let’s talk about ~~quirk counseling.~~

So like, I tried for so long to maintain a layer of skepticism about what Curious said about quirk counseling.  After all, Curious was a villain, a member of a free-quirk-use cult, violently against the current social order.  She was categorically not a reliable narrator about the intentions and outcomes of quirk counseling!  All the same, it seemed safe to assume she was at least partially right, if only because, in a meta view, no one ever showed up to contradict her!  If we were meant to understand that she was wrong, why allow her words to stand uncontested?

Well, it turns out it’s because she was 100% right!

“They attempt to hammer out any bumps in your understanding of the world and program you to fit neatly into society’s little boxes,” she said, and, “The counseling ends up emphasizing the inherent differences among us all.”  And here we find a counselor saying, “Let’s get you all reformed, nice and normal,” thus emphasizing that Toga is very much not normal.

Of course, the counselor then immediately turns around and reveals that Toga’s desires are normal, at least in the sense that “deviant” desires are quite common in “children with powerful quirks.”  It happens all the time, apparently!  Despite the frequency of the problem, though, the best answer Hero Society has come up with is to preach repression, to strictly control who is allowed to use their quirk—and thus alleviate any natural urges that might accompany it.

Remember what Re-Destro said back in Chapter 227?

Wow!  It’s almost like this was an entirely predictable outcome!

O My perennial gloating about the (MVA-era) MLA being justified and correct aside, it’s interesting and, I think, promising that Horikoshi made time to include that bit on quirk counseling here.  Firstly, it reinforces the idea that Toga did not become a villain due to the actions of one discrete villain like AFO; she was failed by society at large, so simply offering her the sanctified blessing of The Sympathy of One (1) Teenager is not going to do a thing about the problems that created her, and will go on creating others like her unless real change happens in the attitudes of the current society.

(Of course, all of that is also true for Spinner, and we saw how the confrontation with the societal problems that created him went, thanks but no thanks, Shouji.)

Moreover, though, it’s yet another element that points in the direction of the Quirk Singularity Theory looming on the horizon.  If quirks are getting stronger and stronger as generations pass (and we’ve got plenty of evidence that suggests that they are) and psychological issues like Toga’s are common in those with strong quirks (and I don’t see any reason for a professional counselor to misstate something like that[3]), then it follows that such issues will also become more common as quirks increase in strength.  Indeed, an irresistibly strong desire to use one’s quirk would be a logical expression of Ujiko’s conclusion that quirks will eventually go out of control!

This is the dark side of Second’s conflation of a person’s intent with the term “quirk” back in Chapter 369.  It’s a place where the translation of the word kosei as “quirk” obscures the sentence somewhat.  Recall that the word Horikoshi uses translates more literally as “personality.”  So, Second says that a strong intent is what makes a person fearsome, and this is why meta-abilities were given the name they were[4]: the power is merely a vessel, a weapon to be used to carry out the intent in question, a characterful, personalized expression of one’s inner will.  In other words, a “personality.”

But the inverse also becomes true.  If a quirk, a “personality,” is reflective of one’s will, then to suppress one’s quirks is to suppress one’s will.  To condemn someone’s quirk becomes the same as condemning them.  To label a quirk deviant is to label the person’s will deviant.  And if a quirk grows too strong to control, then the will-as-embodied-by-the-quirk also goes out of control.  Hence, Toga snaps after too many years of suppression.

So how does that problem get addressed?  The MLA, of course, wanted free quirk use, because Destro foresaw a time when quirks would grow too powerful for suppression to be effective.  Even radical self-acceptance and an even more radical restructuring of society are still just kicking that problem down the road, though, assuming they’d be effective at all—not that it looks like Hero Society is on the cusp of embracing that particular point of the MLA’s ideology regardless!  Indeed, as Team Hero still regards the problem of quirks increasing in strength as “fringe thinking reserved for cults,” they don’t seem to have any intention at all of addressing the problem.  Time will tell if the story itself will do so.

O It’s striking that even after some years of emotional abuse, Toga was still barefacedly begging her parents to please explain to her what made her so different from everyone else.  It’s a telling parallel to her willingness to actively seek out Ochaco and Deku to ask their opinion on things, and makes it not terribly surprising that she reacts so negatively to being rebuffed by them.  Her whole question in the wake of Jin’s death was whether heroes viewed villains as human—when heroes go on to reject her, like her parents did, of course she’d assume that it means those heroes also view her as inhuman.

   

Stray Notes

O ‘Eeeeeey, people picked up on the Death part of the Parade name this time!  I notice it hasn’t been corrected in the online version of 375, though; I wonder if the volume release will fix it?

O One thing I wasn’t clear on from the leaks/scanlation—the former of which are too fuzzy, the latter too murky—but am very happy to see here is that the Himijin Horde is definitely visible on the horizon for Hawks.  You can tell from the difference in the shading: fuzzy, gray, irregularly sized trees on the right and left, but a long black line of much more regular height in the center:

They’re heading for the Todorokis and Iida, too, of course, but Hawks is obviously the confrontation I’m most interested in.  (Read: GET ‘IM.  GEEEET ‘IM.)  Very much hope we get to see that before Uraraka completely defuses this whole situation.

O Love the acknowledgement from both Ochaco and Tsuyu that Ochaco’s efforts here are late, and that’s worth an apology, worth Toga being upset about.  I’m thrilled that the story is finally, explicitly folding villains into that idea expressed by Nedzu that it’s difficult but necessary for someone to be the first one to hold out a hand if society is to meaningfully advance.  I extra love that Ochaco is holding out that hand while also taking a huge risk: offering her thoughts on why Toga’s having problems with making quirk-use-capable clones.

As I said about Chapter 382, Toga resolving that issue would be incredibly dangerous for Team Hero, and I love that Uraraka is still—despite being very aware of that danger—willing to try to help Toga with it.  With no guarantee of reciprocity, with everything at stake, Uraraka still takes the time to carry on that conversation because it’s what her heart tells her is the right thing to do.

After all, if she can resolve Toga’s issue, that stands to win her back at least a degree of Toga’s faith, at which point a Toga-made clone of Shigaraki obliterating this whole stretch of countryside would no longer be what Toga wants.[5] More than the strategic considerations, though, it's plainly apparent that Toga struggling with Jin's quirk is causing her great anguish, and that's really what Uraraka wants to soothe.

Taking the talk-no-jutsu gamble is how Shinsou should have handled Machia; it’s how Deku should have been handling Shigaraki instead of drowning him in his Fist Ocean.  I praised Mirio for making at least a game attempt at it, and Shouto took a crack at it before slipping back into castigation; if Spinner had been coherent enough to hold an actual conversation with Shouji, we might have gotten it there.  This conflict, though, is where I expect the tactic to finally work, as Toga has both the emotional investment in Uraraka[6] and the presence of mind/free agency to actually respond.  I can’t wait to see how it goes!

O Toga’s spitting-mad injunction that Uraraka not dare to pity her based on societal standards that never made room for Toga to begin with is an excellent echo of Jin's indignance that Hawks would dare to say Jin led an “unlucky” life, as well as Toga’s own fury at Curious for trying to paint her as miserable.

----------------- FOOTNOTES -----------------

[1] So far as I can tell, there’s not an officially recognized difference between “being poor” and “living in poverty”—they’re just different parts of speech describing the same condition—though it seems many people feel instinctively that there’s a difference in severity there.  Still, I’ll stick with “poverty” in this case: while Uraraka’s family never seemed so destitute that they were worried about keeping a roof over their heads, we know that, as of the beginning of the manga, she was skipping meals to save money.  I doubt she would have been so blasé about going hungry that it could be used as grist for comedic volume extras if she didn’t have prior experience with it, and not having enough money to have regular meals is right there in what it means to live under the poverty line.

[2] Elsewhere in this same angle, Deku’s frank empathy for and validation of Gentle and his motivations is what made Gentle’s return feel so much more earned compared to Nagant’s, and Shouto scolding Dabi for involving innocent people proved ineffective.  Shouji, meanwhile, took a stab at validating the mob’s pain, but didn’t have a single word of sympathy for Spinner.

[3] You know, assuming she doesn’t turn out to have been secretly on AFO’s payroll or something.

[4] Setting aside Second’s rampant historical revisionism about the origin of the term, of course, because not a lick of what he says lines up with the actual story of the Mother of Quirks.

[5] Though, you know, the clone Shigaraki would probably still want it!

[6] Dabi’s emotionally invested in Shouto, but in an inverted way, not one that primes him to listen to anything Shouto has to say.

[wibble-wobbegong]

Who is Peter Owens?

Okay so! Officially decided to separate Peter from the full saint post (in progress), though the theories merge together a little. If you’ve been keeping up with it, you probably already know a fair amount of this stuff!! This is just a deeper dive.

In short, Peter Owens is a theoretical character stemmed from wanting to understand the purpose behind ‘Peter’ being a name that’s repeated several times throughout S4. This will serve as both a theory and analysis, discussing why I think Peter exists and then analyzing his impact on the narrative!! I’m gonna use this post to discuss the 5 Peters, Peter’s role in the story, and his connections to Mike as his antithesis.

The 5 Peters

The kickstarter of this theory is the fact that Peter is a name repeated four times throughout the show. The repetition of names is something that never happens unless some important connection is meant to be made. For example, Billy and Will are both named William or how there are two other characters named Henry in earlier seasons. Repetitive names are a sign to pay attention!! For a name to be repeated four times in the same season with absolutely no allusion to who this could actually be?? That’s even more aggressive than the repetition of Henry’s name from earlier seasons. There is something very important about this Peter character and he could not be hinted at in previous seasons, but we NEED to be paying attention to him now.

Who are the four Peters mentioned by name in-show?

1. Lab Peter

2. Peter, Owens’ Son

3. Petey McHew

4. Peter Bingham

I did, however, say that there are five Peters! There is another Peter tied to the show by name, but he isn’t mentioned in the show itself. His name is;

5. Peter Ballard

The first step is to figure out what the connecting factor is between all these different characters! They’re all in very different settings with very different roles. Seemingly. Let’s get the facts down for each of these characters.

Lab Peter | 4x01, 6:19

The Peter in the lab isn’t given a last name, so we only know him as Peter. Brenner only refers to him as Peter. We never actually see who exactly it is that he’s talking to, we only know that a Peter is present in the lab at the time of Henry’s massacre. I could only find one potential subject to be Lab Peter, because of his lack of a last name compared to the other ones.

The man on the right is the only one of the military men whose last name isn’t visible. Here we have Miller in the middle, the man on the left has a last name too short to be Ballard.

My eyes aren’t the best, but I’m pretty sure these are Blackmen and Thatcher.

It’s possible that the man without a last name is meant to be Peter, but it seems unlikely because Brenner calls for two people, Peter and Alan. Our Peter traveled in a group of two, and these three traveled as a trio. There’s a chance this is Peter, but it doesn’t line up with information we’re given from the other Peters.

The two facts about Lab Peter; was at the lab at the time of the massacre and he was with someone named Alan.

Peter, Owens’ Son | 4x03, 3:11

When the government raids Owens’ house, they shuffle through old boxes and they take things, including a non-descript metal box and someone named Peter’s box of school projects. He’s most likely Owens’ son, considering he kept the school projects in his house and then being school projects indicate him having been younger with Owens and living with him long enough to gather a box full of projects. The fact that his wife is aware and she’s the one upset about the projects means she was attached to him as well, but she isn’t involved with anything in the lab as far as we know.

^ the projects

The facts of this Peter? Owens’ wife attached enough to him to suggest he wasn’t just a lab kid, the projects indicate that he was involved with the Owens for a length of time, and he’s most likely their son.

Petey McHew | 4x04, 22:47

“But can I tell you a story? 1978, I was at summer camp. And my counselor Drew told me and everyone in Cabin C the true story of the Victor Creel massacre. And little Petey McHew… you know Petey, right, Ruth? Yeah. Little Petey McHew started sobbing right there on the spot. Full on hyperventilating.”

And here we have the story of Petey McHew! The most prominent thing about McHew is his fear of Victor and the fact that he was at summer camp. We also know that ‘Ruth’ and ‘Rose’ were familiar with Petey. Those names are relevant because they’re also repetitive in the story.

Ruth, Nevada is the neighborhood which Owens lives and where NINA lies.

Rose is something relevant to the Creel home as well as a connection to Owens.

The pillow is only visible when Owens stands during his argument with Sullivan (the military guy), hence the connection.

Peter Bingham | 13:37

The boy that looks like Will? That’s Peter Bingham. He’s the Peter that we know the least about. He’s using salt, wearing orange and blue, and he has the same haircut as Will in S4.

In the background, on the pinboard, there’s another summer camp reference! The flyer for Camp Know-where, the summer camp Dustin and Suzie went to, is pinned. It’s the version for 1986, but you can see the computer logo in the middle of the top of the flyer! On the official site, they describe every day as being an adventure, which lines up with the phrase “Adventure is Calling!” plastered on the flyer.

Peter Ballard

This is the tweet where they denounced the connection between Peter Ballard and Henry Creel. Of course, you should always take what the Stranger Writers say with a grain of salt, but the fact that they also addressed the difference between Enzo and Dmitri in the same tweet, which actually is true, does make me more inclined to believe them. They’re drawing a connection, and while one could be real and one could be fake, parallels are often used to reveal the truth.

Just like how Enzo was a fake name, an entirely different name for an entirely different thing. Enzo has been used before by Hopper, referring to the waiter as Enzo in S3 when he gets stood up by Joyce. Enzo is not the name of a character. Peter Ballard, in the same way isn’t the name of a character. It is, however, relevant to the story somehow.

The biggest thing about Ballard is that his only connection is to Henry. There’s nothing else about him, simply a name meant to hide the connection between Vecna, 001, and Henry. They could’ve chosen any name, but they chose Peter.

Peter’s Role in the Story

So we have all this information, but how does it come together? Who exactly is Peter, and what purpose does he serve in the narrative?

There are 3 major connections within the 5 Peters; Henry Creel, Sam Owens, and summer camps. Diving into those connections helps us build the story of Peter Owens (though i’m sure his name already gives you a bit of a hint).

Connecting the Dots

How does Henry play into the different stories of a few of the different Peters?

Lab Peter - The Peter mentioned is referenced right before Henry’s massacre, as well as being a worker for the lab. The lab was sort of built for Henry; to study him and his abilities, to control him, to recreate him. Anyone involved in the lab somehow has a direct tie to Henry Creel. In the lab, we don’t even have confirmation who Peter actually is, so it is a popular theory that Henry is called Peter in the lab!

Petey McHew - This is one of the more direct connections because of the mention of Victor Creel, specifically the story of Victor supposedly murdering people. The person actually behind those murders is Henry. Victor is also Henry’s father.

Peter Ballard - Quite honestly the most blatant tie to Henry, considering it was a cover name for his character. Peter Ballard has no other connections to any other character.

Now, this seems to be pointing in the direction of Peter being another version of Henry; someone to add on top of the ever growing list of characters that are secretly Henry. It heavily points to 001 actually being referred to as Peter in the lab, even.

The problem with that, however, is that it doesn’t explain why Peter is so heavily connected to Owens and not Brenner. We’ve never even seen Owens and Henry interact and Owens was strangely absent in the flashbacks to the lab.

I considered that Henry had been living as Peter and Owens’ son at some point, but that doesn’t make sense when paired with Brenner’s obsession with him and his need to control him. Brenner and Owens have a strained relationship, they barely trust each other in S4. If Brenner was going to leave Henry in someone’s hands, it wouldn’t have been Owens.

Alongside that, there are also things in these stories that directly connect to Henry that don’t align with what we know about Henry. Peter is scared of Victor — scared of the damage he can do. Henry states that he views his father as naive and pathetic, he never saw his father as someone to fear. Victor wasn’t a good father by any means, but he did love Henry. He never directly caused him harm and tried to protect him (though his thinking is flawed). There is zero reason for Henry to be scared of Victor, especially in relation to those murders.

As for Peter Ballard, it makes no sense for Henry to also be Peter when we look at the parallels drawn to Enzo’s false name in that tweet. If it were a statement on its own, it would be deserving of suspicion, but there’s an intentional inclusion of Dmitri. Parallels are something we use all the time to determine the reality of a situation, so that parallel is meant to be used to reveal the truth again.

Henry Creel is not Peter.

So who else could he be? Why does he still have such strong connections to Henry if he isn’t Henry himself?

Now, we turn to Owens’ son. Here’s the thing. Owens has incredibly strong ties to the Creel family for some reason despite not seeming to be involved at all.

When Owens is presented with the photo of Chrissy’s body, he claims not to know anything about it. His reaction says the opposite. When the military leaves, Owens immediately goes to check on NINA information. Later, when his agents have picked up El and they’re in the restaurant, he says, “A war is coming to Hawkins.”

How would he know that? Ever since November 1983, there has never been a body that looked like Chrissy’s. It’s a completely new style of killing. In fact, this is the only one that could’ve feasibly been done by a person. What the general points out doesn’t necessarily eliminate an ordinary person. Yet, somehow, Owens knows that this means a war is coming to Hawkins. The only way he’d know anything about what a body like that means is if he was aware of the true nature of the 1959 Creel murders. He doesn’t go searching for Victor. He was on the inside. He knew about Henry and his abilities. He knows about Henry’s anger, about his motivation and what these kills would lead to.

Arguably, Owens knows even more about Henry than Brenner. When talking to Will in S2 after his episode, he asks a series of typical questions until Will brings up his feeling that the Mind Flayer is evil. Owens’ response?

“What do you think the evil wanted?”

HOW would you make the jump from ‘big evil sky shadow this kid is seeing due to trauma’ to it wanting something? It’s never interacted with Will directly. Will has just been seeing it. It doesn’t even chase him till Halloween!! Owens had no reason to ask that question. Yet he did.

Owens questions things someone with no knowledge shouldn’t be questioning. I’m not saying that he knows Henry is behind the Mind Flayer. He’s asking the right questions though.

More so, I bring up the rose thing again. Owens is also tied to the rose of the Creel house.

Owens knows so much about Henry, and yet we know Henry can’t be Peter. It doesn’t make sense. Somehow, Owens has knowledge of the Creels, their history, and Henry’s endeavors without there ever being a direct connection made.

Here appears to be a roadblock. What other character could possibly be Peter? None of our current characters knew about Victor and had those same ties to both Henry and Owens. That’s when an anon suggested to me that Peter may be a character we haven’t met yet.

There’s something about Henry’s character that makes him feel somewhat… incomplete. Or rather, there’s room to expand upon the cause of his and his abusers actions. Henry is heavily queercoded and the same language that’s used to describe Will is used to describe Henry. They parallel each other in so many ways, through trauma and powers, and there are hints towards parallels of queerness, yet they’re never really expanded upon. We never see the blatant comparison for sexuality as we do for their artistic ability or being traumatized. They’re both “sensitive,” but as far as parallels go, that one is the only obvious one (broken seems to be more about trauma than queerness, though it’s applicable to both). Why have all these parallels and hints towards queerness only to stop with their toes on the line?

What I’d like to point out is that the lab seems to function as a sort of allegory for conversion therapy. Henry was sent away to Brenner because he needed to be fixed, because something about him made him different and whatever it was was the thing Virginia hated. She didn’t seem to know about his powers, and Henry appeared to be the idolized American child (white, blond, blue-eyed, able-bodied, skinny). If what she hates is what we can’t see, and Henry is already queercoded, it’s likely she hates him for his queerness and wanted to send him to Brenner so he could “fix it”.

How would Virginia know this about Henry? Sexuality is something that, if not told, has to be discovered. Henry was a young kid, only 12, there isn’t much he could’ve been doing alone that would out him.

Remember how I said Henry and Will’s parallels are a bit incomplete? Another question; do you think Lonnie’s hatred of Will stemmed entirely from the fact that he was a quiet kid who liked art? That Lonnie decided Will was queer based off that alone? It’s possible, but remember that Mike was part of Will’s life when Lonnie was still around. Lonnie may have hated Will for not being stereotypically masculine, may have made some assumptions, but with how affectionate Will and Mike were before S3 it’s safe to assume they’ve always been like that. Two boys being affectionate is a way more reasonable jump of logic (not that lonnie/homophobes are reasonable). Will’s queerness would probably remain under tight wraps if it weren’t for Mike. Hell, Will’s love for Mike is how Jonathan knows he’s gay. Sexuality on its own doesn’t have to be romantic to be true, but Will’s arc with his sexuality is heavily based on his feelings for Mike.

Taking those facts, let’s say something similar happened to Henry. Henry was somehow discovered, prompting the Creels to move and for Virginia to want to send him to Brenner (she also possibly sexually abused him in her own attempts to fix him). Who would Henry have been with at the time? Who would recommend Brenner to Virginia? Who has strong ties to the Creel family?

Peter is Owens’ son. The Creels lived in Ruth, Nevada near Owens. Henry and Peter most likely met at a summer camp, or at least went to one together (possibly another allegory for conversion therapy, but i’m not 100% sure they were sent to the camp for being gay) and grew close. Most likely, they were best friends and a little more, just like Mike and Will had been.

Peter was always scared of Victor, a very religious man who loved his family and wanted to protect them from demons. Victor had a gun he sat outside with at the Creel house, one he planned on using to shoot the demon tormenting his family. Victor is a religious man with a gun who loves his son. Peter is a gay kid, and Victor would most definitely had blamed Peter for “influencing” Henry. Peter had every reason to be scared of Victor.

Owens has a relationship with Brenner and works with him. We don’t know much about Owens’ view on gay people, but considering it was the 1950’s and he’s got a close relationship with Brenner, I wouldn’t be surprised if Owens had worked with him on a conversion therapy project. Of course he’s never been okay with hurting kids, but he’s also always been dedicated to saving them. Owens and Brenner are men of science, and science at the time was flooded with propaganda that stated homosexuality was a curable disease. Owens wanted to help cure these children, hence his grid shirts and role as the web of the spider, but he’d never do so through the extremes Brenner would.

If the Owens and the Creels discovered their children were gay, gay together, Owens could very well have recommended Brenner to Virginia for when they moved away. Brenner ran a location in Hawkins, Indiana, posed as a hospital with electrocution materials at the ready (Terry Ives was shocked till her brain was scrambled). Electro-shock therapy was a very common treatment.

Of course, after Henry’s powers were discovered, Brenner was no longer interested in fixing him but became obsessed with understanding his abilities.

Basically, Peter is Owens’ son and Henry’s childhood lover just like how Will is the son of a homophobic man and has his own childhood lover.

How Peter Influenced Henry

How did Peter actually impact the plot, beyond just being the one Henry got caught with? It does in fact go further beyond, and this is where we bring in one more Peter that I haven’t mentioned yet. He’s never said by name, but he is in the show.

This painting on the left from the Russian church is a painting of Saint Peter. He’s most known for two things; holding the keys to the kingdom of heaven and his written vision of the Second Coming of Christ, called the Apocalypse of Peter.

The Apocalypse of Peter, when you look into the visions listed (punishments for sinners) they tell a very similar story to what we’ve been seeing in S4 and hint at what’s likely to come in S5. Not every prediction will be used, but a lot of them will. These are written in order of the actual listed punishments in the apocalythe, but only some of them have happened; others are predictions for future character events.

“Blasphemers are hanged by the tongue.”

Blasphemy; the act or offense of speaking sacrilegiously about God or sacred things; profane talk:

This is an unfulfilled but predicted event for Mike. This will likely play into effect during his trance in S5, but you never really know with this series.

“Women who adorn themselves for the purpose of adultery are hung by their hair over a bubbling mire.”

Unfulfilled, but not surprising. She’s been emphasized for a reason, we’re just yet to learn why. It seems she may end up partaking in Henry’s punishments, which makes sense given his attitude towards her through Billy.

“Murderers and their allies are tormented by venomous creatures and numberless worms.”

Is now a good time to mention that there’s a pretty good chance Peter died?

“Liars whose lies caused the death of martyrs have their lips cut off, with fire in their body and entrails.”

The victims were all martyrs and Jason’s lies led to their deaths, as if not for the conflict they may have been able to come up with a real solution quicker. It seems like he has fire in his ‘body and entrails’ to me! Get fucked.

“Men who take on the role of women in a sexual way, and lesbians, fall from the precipice of a great cliff repeatedly.”

Isn’t it wild how gay men and women are said to fall from the great cliff repeatedly? How Mike has yet to do this action under Henry’s influence, and yet there are signs of him not only going back to the cliff but doing so during his trance? Where no one can save him?

“Those who do not heed the counsel of their elders are attacked by flesh-devouring birds.”

Kinda what he gets for not listening.

“Women who had premarital sex have their flesh torn to pieces.”

Are you starting to see the pattern between all the people who’re predicted targets? 

“Sorcerers are hung on a wheel of fire.”

So, it seems the Peter may have had an influence on Henry’s future goals considering how many similarities there are between Peter’s Apocalypse and Henry’s plan of action.

I doubt Peter quoted these types of punishments as an exact plan, but it very much so seems like he’d been angry at those who oppressed people like him and Henry, which makes perfect sense if he had a conversion therapist for a father. If Peter had been enduring homophobic rhetoric his whole life, only to find out he was the very type of person his father sought to fix, of course he could learn to hate people like Owens; people who were at the top ranks of society, who got to live their lives how they pleased and control everyone they’d decided was below them.

Peter’s beliefs could’ve been a motive behind Henry’s actions. Obviously, Peter alone wasn’t a motive, but I think he played an important part as to why Henry started killing in Hawkins —why he was even in Hawkins in the first place. Peter spoke of a world where the people who hurt them were finally brought down, a world where they could be saved. Henry could make that happen. Henry understood what Peter was talking about on a deep, deep level. He felt it too. Losing Peter, the one person who showed him kindness, probably played a role in Henry’s chosen path of salvation and revenge, though he’s twisted things to fit into his own moral/ethical code.

Now, what’s really interesting is that Henry and Will are parallels and antitheses. In the same way, I think Peter is meant to be Mike’s antithesis.

Mike’s Antithesis

This last part shouldn’t be too long! Basically, when we look at the narrative, Peter is being built as Mike’s antithesis in a similar way to how Henry is built as Will’s antithesis. Without having Peter as a canonical character, and therefore having no guaranteed understanding of his personality and moral code, this will mostly be based off of everything I’ve talked about this far in the theory.

Where are they similar? Both of them grew up in peaceful, suburban class homes with passive fathers who were pretty openly homophobic. Ted isn’t to the extreme that Owens may have been, but he’s made more than his fair share of snide remarks and there’s a Reagan sign in front of the house. There’s also the way that the boy they’re both in love with had a scary, homophobic dad with a gun.

On a deeper level, they both play very similar roles in the narrative. Henry and Will both fight for a lot of reasons, but just like how Will finds his courage and strength in Mike, Henry may possibly doing the same from the memory of Peter. This is also where they start to diverge a little bit, becoming antitheses to each other.

Where Peter finds sanctuary in hating those above him, Mike finds sanctuary in the people on his level. Peter only looks up at he could’ve had, but Mike doesn’t even bother being jealous of the people above them. He looks left and right and finds the beauty in the people around him. They’re his best friends! Peter and Mike both want to be able to be themselves, but their approaches to that are different. They share their views with the people around them, taking leadership roles (Saint Peter was given the keys to the kingdom of heaven, which serve as leadership and faith encouraging tools over the people) and guiding people to follow their beliefs too. Peter encouraged revenge and an us vs them attitude. Mike encouraged community, always tells his friends how amazing they are and serves as a beacon of hope for the people around him more often than not.

Where Henry is dark and Will is light, Peter is despair and Mike is hope. Where Henry is rejection and Will is acceptance, Peter is hatred and Mike is love.

Mike and Will are a version of Peter and Henry. They’re the ones who end up together. Peter and Henry lacked so much love, it was what drove Henry to become the monster he is. Will has been surrounded by love, it sets him on the path of goodness Henry never had. Where Henry lost his childhood love and was left alone, Will and Mike pulled through. It’s sort of perfect that Peter would be introduced as Henry’s old love interest in the same season Mike and Will finally get together. Showing Peter too early as a parallel to Mike and Henry’s crush may have given too much insight into byler.

Another fun little thing; Mike has a lot of imagery regarding crosses this season for reasons unknown. Saint Peter died via crucification, but he was crucified upside down. Makes me wonder what that could mean for Mike, seeing as how Henry is the “upside down” version of Will, in a sense. Definitely nothing good, but interesting nonetheless.

I think that’s everything! At least, the important stuff. Any other small details I find about Peter will go under ‘#petergate’ and general posting about Peter will just be tagged with his name, ‘#peter owens’. He’s a little fucked up but he’s also just a little guy. You ever met a 12 year old? He’s pretty normal tbh

Thank you for reading!!!

[pelideswhore]

Achilles and Apollo analysis

ty for this ask and i’m sorry it took this long lmao… this also applies to everyone else who submitted an essay suggestion way back then, i’m still gonna be answering those eventually. i’m sorry for the delay lol

Apollo || Achilles parallels

When you consider the actual content of the Iliad, it’s noteworthy that the epic starts with the (almost) simultaneous wrath of Apollo and Achilles. In both cases, the consequence is the death of hundreds, which shows their power. However, they’re different in that Apollo is a) acting on the wishes of a mortal and that b) Apollo chills out when he gets what he wants, Achilles however continues sulking. Unlike Apollo, Achilles attempts to harvest as much as possible from his “divine wrath”, despite Apollo being the actually divine one. To be entirely fair towards Achilles, he is mortal and hence has more to lose/less time to enjoy life to its fullest (source: In Our Time podcast). They are paralleled again in the last book of the Iliad, when Achilles recounts the story of Niobe to Priam. He compares Niobe to Priam, thus comparing himself to Apollo.

Throughout the entire Iliad, Apollo and Achilles follow what I call ‘opposing character arcs’. There’s definitely a proper name for that, but what I mean is that they’re basically headed in opposite directions on the same road. While Achilles needs to be humbled, Apollo needs an ego boost.

To clarify: Apollo is way too attached to mortals during the war, most notably Hector, but also Chryses and if you include backstory, Cassandra. Of course, the other gods also have certain mortals they look after, but no one gets as attached as Apollo does. Artemis (his twin) is completely detached from the war, and Athena (who has a similar amount of screen time) is not attached to the mortals themselves, but rather what they mean to the war. Poseidon cares so little that he, despite being actively on the Greek side, saves Aeneas’ life in order to abide fate. This is how he addresses him after saving him from Achilles:

‘What power, O prince, with force inferior far, // urged thee to meet Achilles’ arm in war? // Henceforth beware, nor antedate thy doom, // Defrauding Fate of all thy fame to come.’

Apollo, on the other hand, saves Hector’s life on many, many occasions, despite knowing his death being ruled by fate. Achilles states this explicitly in Book 20:

Achilles closes with his hated foe, // His heart and eyes with flaming fury glow: // But present to his aid, Apollo shrouds // The favoured hero in a veil of clouds. // Thrice struck Pelides with indignant heart, // Thrice in impassive air he plunged the dart: // The spear a fourth time buried in the cloud; // He foams with fury and exclaims aloud: // ‘Wretch! Thou hast escaped again, once more thy flight // Has saved thee, and the partial god of light. // But long thou shalt not thy fate withstand, // If any power assist Achilles’ hand […]’

The goal of Apollo’s character arc is for him to recognize his superior spot as a god on Olympus.

Achilles is the exact opposite of this. Achilles sees himself as above all others, even above fate itself (paradoxically, that is a mortal thing to think; Zeus, the ultimate immortal, acknowledges his inferiority towards the fates). Achilles is determined to live as long as possible, though he knows that his fate rules otherwise.

As you can see, Apollo and Achilles mirror each other in some way. Nevertheless, within these similarities they remain different. I’ve compiled a list of examples from the Iliad:

Book I: Achilles needs Thetis’/Zeus’ help to execute his wrathful plan, Apollo on the hand can execute his own plan himself,

Book XVI: Apollo helps Hector in killing Achilles, which is directly paralleled to

Book XXIII: Athena helping Achilles kill Hector (note that Achilles and Apollo are on opposite sides of the spectrum; Achilles is the one receiving help, instead of being the one to give it) — p.s.: it’s interesting that Hector was killed due to the help of Athena, his reasonable, divine counterpart, just as Achilles would be killed by Apollo, his vengeful and wrathful divine counterpart (x)

Despite proving himself to be a needy goofball (affectionate), Achilles doesn’t stop from continuously acting like he’s a god.

That is until Patroclus dies. By the end of the epic, both have completed their arc. For Achilles, the turning point comes when Patroclus dies (notably at the hands of Apollo). Following Patroclus’ death, Achilles admits he’s not divine and not even the best of the greeks. He abandons his fear of death, even brings it upon himself and falls in battle, just as was expected of him.

Similarly, Apollo does not intervene to help Hector during the duel. In a way, he even caused it by killing Patroclus. After that, he only shows his affection for Hector by protecting his corpse until Priam can collect it. After the end of the Iliad, by the time Troy has fallen, he’s so detached that he doesn’t even take part in the siege. He doesn’t do anything he shouldn’t to protect anyone he shouldn’t.

Okay, this is the part where I start reading into things that are just Not That Deep, but Apollo and Achilles have both earned themselves a certain level of closure, so here we go.

Regarding their appearance, Apollo and Achilles’ classic feature is their long, blonde hair. I am, of course, an advocate for redhead Achilles, but xanthos (the word used to describe him) can mean blonde. Walter Burkert regards Achilles almost as a “doppelgänger” of Apollo, mainly because of their hair (x). This similarity builds a connection between Apollo and Achilles, which isn’t super deep, but interesting.

The cutting of Achilles’ hair is not only an act of respect to Patroclus, it’s also him giving a part of himself to death, and if you distance yourself from the war motive, it’s the point where Achilles ascends from boyhood to manhood (x). Above I mentioned that their long hair connects Apollo and Achilles — by cutting his hair, Achilles is removing the one big connection he still had to Apollo and thereby his strive for divinity.

Apollo gets his closure by basically killing Achilles through Paris, whom he uses as a tool without getting attached to him. Achilles’ death could also be symbolic for Apollo killing the mortal part of himself, which Achilles represents. Walter Burkert says Achilles’ death at the hand of Apollo specifically was unavoidable since “the hero [is] an obscure reflection of the god in the indissoluble polarity of sacrifice” (x, trans.). By the time Euripides’ Orestes takes place, Apollo is acting very much like Athena, manipulating and toying from high above instead of being sentimental. He ruthlessly destroys Orestes’ life for no reason other than the fact that he wanted to.

To me, the hate between Apollo and Achilles might very well stem from disguised self-hatred — they see in the other their own flaws and direct the anger that the self-reflection causes on each other. Beyond this (at risk of sounding too much like Troy the film), it might be jealousy for what the other possesses, namely divinity or mortality for which they long so much.

[stilesssolo]

Okay.. let’s hear it! Initial thoughts of the new album!

Ugh sorry for the delay on this. I listened to the (first) album when it dropped at midnight, finished it and saw her say “double album, 15 more songs!!” went “that’s nice. I’m going to bed” fully intending to spend most of today listening and relistening to fully take it in, but then there was a crisis at work and I suddenly had a shitton to do in a very little amount of time which was not a conducive environment to fully digest these *very* dense songs. I still haven’t sat down and done nothing but listen to half the songs on the anthology, so. I am never more jealous of west coast time zoners than during new music drops. 😂

I immediately logged off the internet when I heard it had leaked Wednesday so I truly went into this blind. My initial thoughts are… well… okay! I don’t dislike it. But I don’t love it, you know? The songs are very dense but I still don’t think it’s her best writing (and I’m a Bruce Springsteen girlie; I love a cryptic lyrically dense album). There are a whole bunch of songs that I really enjoy and some REALLY good lyrics. But I remember hearing Cardigan or YOYOK for the first time and how that felt and I just don’t get that on anything here. I also cannot acknowledge the implications of how many goddamn songs are about Matty Healy and how in love with him she was without risking a mental breakdown!!! The idea that CARDIGAN was written about him… I cannot do this… take me back to when we thought The 1 was for sure about Harry Styles. I was present for the Gillette rain show “I’m the happiest I’ve ever been” psychotic break and I STILL was not prepared for the amount of psycho behavior on this album regarding the rat man!!!!

I think I have two main problems with this album. 1: it is too goddamn long. I am not one to complain about getting more content but I feel like a lot of these songs are just saying the same thing and not doing it in a way unique enough to justify having both of them. Like I think we could have EASILY trimmed a lot of fat and gotten these both into one 20-ish track album that would have read better. I feel like a lot of this has to do with the social media culture now of more, more, more, always racing towards the next thing— like how a day after we got 1989 TV the swifties were clamoring for rep TV. Like we just got 5 new songs!!! Slow down!!! I would have preferred quality over quantity lol and this album very much felt like quantity, quantity, quantity.

And then 2: I miss when she used to really push herself to try different things and to get better at her craft. Not that I want her to be attacked and get backlash, but her insane levels of fame have made her so untouchable that no one can say anything remotely constructive without being crucified and I feel like it eliminates some of the drive she has to push herself to be better and write better (hello Speak Now and Red!!!). I saw Rolling Stone gave this album a perfect 100 score like???? Hello???? The album is not bad, but to grade it as perfection compared to others? Over Red? Over Folklore? Over 1989??? Let’s be real. And I feel like this album has a lot of “well it’s good enough” moments where I’m like… but is it good enough? Could we have worked to make this better? I feel like she needs new collaborators too. She does great work with Jack and Aaron but I feel like they know each other too well and it’s getting to the point where they’re not editing or pushing her as much as they should be. A lot of the songwriting here just felt complacent. Get Liz Rose back in the room I am begging!!!!!

Now that I’ve typed all that out I feel like I am being increasingly harsh, but idk. It’s a fine album. There are some songs I enjoy and I’m sure it’s gonna grow on me more as I listen and really digest, but it doesn’t really have any super stand out moments to me right now. I saw a tweet saying this album is not to top the charts, not to draw in new fans, this is for the swifties who know and care about Taylor’s lore and want to listen and know what was going on during this period of her life, and she just needed to get it out there and say it so she can move on. And I do enjoy the lore, don’t get me wrong, but I kinda hope that’s the case and the next album is a clean slate, because… other than the lore, there’s nothing really new or interesting here, sonically, lyrically, etc. I really hope her next album she takes a big risk and does something different. I also feel like she needs a BREAK. Like I don’t want any new music for the entire year of 2025. Go recharge and take a break and come back to us with your best work, queen. I feel like the rerecords and the constant churning out of new music and content is just watering down her undeniable talent.

I wanted to like this a lot more than I did, but you know. C’est la vie. I never was a big poetry girlie anyways, and I’ve seen some people say they love the album (and to them I say I’m happy for you I clap I cheer and i’m gonna let you rock!!) but for me… idk. We’ll see how I feel in a week. But throughout the day today I kept feeling the temptation to put Chappell Roan back on, so… I think that sort of sums up my initial feelings on the whole thing. 😂